#Ignore my rant (pt. 2) goodbye now!
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infpravenclaw5w4idkwhatelse · 3 months ago
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in other news, because November Is Approaching, I’ve been in political circles more often on this website, and I’ve been in fandom spaces so much more frequently up until now that I forget that the same rules don’t apply for politics? Specifically, in fandoms, it is accepted and even expected that if you don’t like/ agree with something, you just move on, don’t comment, and steer yourself away from stuff like that in the future, and if you choose not to do that and to instead be an asshole about it, multiple people are generally like “hey man, clearly this wasn’t meant for you. Go about your business and leave them alone”.
And what I forgot about politics is that it’s almost the exact opposite. If you don’t agree, you are obligated to say exactly why and extrapolate on why the original person’s opinion is trash and morally reprehensible. And what’s more, no one at all is like “hey, obviously if this is a post about voting in the U.S. and you don’t live here, it’s not for you” or “if you don’t care about lgbtq rights, obviously you won’t care what Harris has done for them and won’t vote for her. No need to comment about it, bud”. And it’s consistently a little shocking for me.
Now obviously, things discussed in political discussions are waaaay more important than, say, what two characters should but won’t get together, and I’m not trying to say that political discussions should be more like interacting with fan content in that dissenting opinions aren’t welcome, because political discussions shouldn’t be that way; bad decisions are more easily made when no one challenges the rational behind them. It’s just an extreme culture shock to go from spaces where you’re going to be called out and criticized for even politely disagreeing with the OP to ones where it is perfectly ordinary to find not only a comment section made up completely of people who disagree with OP, but who also readily insult and belittle them for making the post in the first place.
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parkers-gal · 4 years ago
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Part 2 of Harry thought she was cheating on with tom" uhm you should do it if you want or not.
Harry wants know the expalantion. Why did y/n and tom are soo soo close??
its okay if you dont want do it :))
hiii sorry it took so long ! :( that piece is called “what’s his.” here’s pt two !! <3
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With two days gone, you feel it’s probably time for you to stop ignoring Tom. After your fight with Harry, you thought it best to not interact with any of the Hollands until things settled, but right now you’re in desperate need of some comfort, and Tom doesn’t deserve to lose a friend because you’re in a rough patch with his brother.
He’d called you an extraordinary amount of times, checking on you and asking questions and offering his help whenever it was needed. You hadn’t answered until today, and he’d replied within seconds.
You were going over to their flat. Tom promised Harry would be out with Sam and Harrison, so you wouldn’t have to deal with awkward encounters or situations. You’re grateful, at least, that your fight with Harry hasn’t splintered your friendship with Tom — at least, not as much as you thought it might.
The beep of your car brings you out of your head — you realize you’re at Tom’s house a lot faster than you thought. You’re on time, though, but you’re not as mentally prepared as you’d like to be. You’re a bit distressed, and noticeably so. Fighting with Harry wasn’t fun.
“Hey, Y/N/N.” Tom greets you as he opens the door, stepping aside to allow you inside. You smile nervously, awkwardly, and you manage to remove your shoes and settle on the couch. Tom has movies and ice cream pulled up, your favorite blanket splayed out on one end of the couch.
As you settle, he sits beside you, hands in his lap while he smiles gently.
“Do you
 wanna watch a movie? Or
 maybe talk about what happened?” He swallows thickly. “I’m here if you need to vent or- rant or whatever they say nowadays.”
You chuckle, almost dryly, but nod nonetheless at his offer. Ten minutes go by with you talking, and somehow you’ve shifted closer to him. Another ten minutes pass and you’re crying into his shoulder about the entire ordeal, hugging his side, leaning into him as another tear falls.
He takes his time with you, calming you down before talking quietly. He’s rationalizing the issue with you, telling you the things Harry said. He knows he shouldn’t, because this really isn’t his business, but he can’t help it. He wants things to work out between you and his brother.
The front door opens, though neither of you hear it through your talking. Harry comes through the hallway, and when he catches sight of you cuddled into his brother’s side, he scoffs, rolling his eyes.
Tom notices him first, and when you follow his eyeline, you quickly separate from Tom, standing as you attempt to go over to him.
“Harry- Harry it’s not what you think-!” You don’t get to say anything you want to, because as he runs up the stairs, his bedroom door slams loudly, leaving you a puzzled puddle at the bottom of the staircase.
When you turn slowly on your heel, you’re close to crying again, and when Tom makes a move to hug you, you step back.
You’re muttering words as you grab your bag and make for the door. “Tom, I’m sorry. This was a bad idea, I- I shouldn’t have come.”
You leave him in the doorway, quickly situating yourself in the driver’s seat of your old car. Tom is sighing to himself, hands rubbing his forehead while he slams the door with a “shit.”
When he turns around, Harry is on the staircase, making his way down. He’s furious, angrily making his way towards Tom. Only, he doesn’t stop. Instead, he walks right past his older brother and straight into the kitchen. Tom finds nothing holding him back as he runs after him.
“Harry- Harry please, wait.”
“No.” He harshly closes the fridge after getting a cup of yogurt out from the pack on the top shelf. “I don’t care for whatever you have to say.” “No, but I want you to know there’s nothing going on between us-”
“Does it look like I give a fuck?” He sets his spoon down on the counter, fingers gripping the edge of the marble in anger. “You’ve already stolen her from me, it doesn’t matter anymore.” As Harry leaves the kitchen, Tom’s anger bubbles into the air, and he can’t stop himself from yelling at his younger brother.
“I didn’t ‘steal’ anyone! It’s your fault that you were too insecure to talk to her instead of accusing her of cheating on you.” Harry turns around slowly, nostrils flaring, jaw clenching and eyes darkening. He drops the cup of strawberry yogurt, the spoon clinking on the hardwood. In a matter of seconds, Harry is lunging at his older brother, about to swing a fist, but luckily, Harrison is by his side in the nick of time. He’d arrived just on time, noticing Harry’s stance and recognizing the signs of when Harry is about to swing a throw.
“Stop, stop.” Harrison’s voice is a loud and stark contrast to the tense silence between the Holland boys.
“Fuck off.” Harry shoves Harrison hands off of his arms, storming out of the room, leaving a breathless Tom and a panting Harrison.
“What the fuck was that about?” Harrison gestures to the entire room, to the direction in which the boy had walked out. Tom doesn’t reply, too caught up in the events that were just portrayed in front of him. “Care to explain?” Harrison gets louder as more time passes, and Tom nods, gesturing for him to stop yelling.
“I just
 Harry walked in on me and Y/N.”
“Oh god, Tom.” Harrison cuts his explanation short, and Tom is quick to clear up the image.
“Not like that. We were just- we were just talking. She started crying so I hugged her and then Harry found us like that.” “So Harry walked in on his brother hugging his girlfriend.” Harrison stated bluntly, clearly.
“Pretty much. But then he got angry so she left so I tried to clear things up but then he got angry and we yelled at each other and-” “And what did you say to him?” Harrison gives Tom a side eye, and Tom winces at himself.
“I
 blamed him for everything.” “Jesus, Tom.”
“How was I supposed to know he was gonna throw a punch?!”
“You weren’t, but you should’ve known you were gonna piss him off even more!”
Tom scoffs, head tilting backwards while he looks at the ceiling in thought. “I don’t know what I’m supposed to do.”
“You need to stay out of their relationship.” Harrison doesn’t sugarcoat what he thinks needs to happen. There’s no happy ending for you and Harry if Tom doesn’t stay out of the waters until it clears up.
“But-”
“No, Tom.” Harrison’s shoulders sag slightly. “Look, I know she’s your friend too, but that’s Harry’s girlfriend. You’ve
 I don’t know
 caused tension? You’ve gotten in between them. They need to bond again.”
“No, yeah, I know. You’re right.” He sighs. “I just
 I don’t know if this is all my fault? It’s not my fault Harry said those things to her.”
“Yeah,” Harrison sips a glass of water. “But you should give them space until they make up.” Tom hums, nodding as he crosses his thick arms. “You know, you could start by explaining why the hell you and Y/N are so close.” Tom eyes him while biting his bottom lip.
“She’s
. Taking online courses so she can get into screenwriting. I’m trying to get her an intern for an upcoming film I’m working on.” He confesses as if it’s the most taboo thing in the world. “She wanted to surprise Harry by saying she’s coming with us for filming. We just- we don’t know if it’s final yet, so we didn’t want to tell him anything.” Harrison rolls his eyes, almost unsurprised at the predicament. “Well, stop making work seem so unprofessional. Harry can handle time away from his girlfriend if it comes to that.”
“Right. I suppose I should talk to her.”
“And then get her to talk to him, yeah.”
“Kay,” Tom grabs his car keys and a jacket before waving goodbye to Harrison, the door clicking on his way out.
**
You’re not sure how Tom convinced you to go to Paddy’s rugby game, but you’re here nonetheless. You have a jersey on under your cardigan, jeans fitted nicely while you stand with your arms crossed. It’s cold and dark out, so the field lights are on and they’re brighter than light mode on your cell phone.
Tom said he’d meet you here, at the bottom of the bleachers. The game has already started, and while you’re mediocrely cheering with the rest of the crowd, you’re still hyper aware of the fact that you’re alone. When you feel a presence next to you, you realize Tom has taken a stance on your left side, Harry on your right.
With a thick swallow of your dignity and courage, you step closer to Harry. “Do you
 wanna talk?”
He chews on his lower lip but nods almost confidently. You shiver as the two of you walk towards a popcorn stand. It’s quiet for a good few moments, beats passing with just the rustling of grass under your shoes.
“I’m
 sorry about everything I said. I know you’d never cheat on me.” He’s first to break the silence, rough deep voice cutting the tension and breaking the ice. “I just- I get so insecure whenever you’re with Tom. I don’t feel like a good boyfriend when you’re always with him.”
You can tell he’s sucked in his breath, a sure sign that if he doesn’t compose himself, he’s going to start crying. You take the opportunity to reply.
“I know,” You breathe out. “I was
 maybe a little too close to Tom. I just- I didn’t realize, y’know? It seemed like you were fine with it but the dynamic got weird and- I’m just
 I’m sorry too. I should’ve tried to
 help you with your insecurities instead of doing
 what I did.”
He nods, watching his feet take each step. “I missed you.” He confesses it just as the two of you come to a stop in front of the popcorn stand. You lick your lips, breathing out a helpless chuckle.
“I really missed you, too.”
When he takes a step closer, you realize what he’s initiating, and you embrace him strongly, holding him tightly, squeezing him. He inhales your scent, sighing to himself and exhaling in relief to have you back in his arms. You smile against his shoulder, bringing him closer, if possible.
“‘M sorry.” He’s grumbling into you, voice rasping. You can tell he’s a bit emotional, so you squeeze him again, pulling apart to look at him.
“‘S okay.” You smile, bringing his face closer to yours. “We’re okay.” Your fingers are under his chin while he nods, and suddenly, your lips are embracing, kissing sensually just as they have so many times before. He can taste your coconut chapstick, and he smiles into the kiss, hands on your waist gently.
“We’re okay.”
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v-arbellanaris · 2 years ago
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Not to nitpick on a personal rant, or revive your previous annoyance, but you've mentioned that Anders refers to Hawke as "one bright light in Kirkwall", instead of "one bright light in [his life]", but it was actually both! Former being a response to Hawke agreeing to get Ser Alrik's ass (unromanced) and the later is from Questioning Beliefs from Act III (romanced). 1/2
It my native language, "the light of one's life" is a very popular pet name, when conveyed by a single word, that translates to "[my] sun". It's also considered to be one of the most endearing ones. I've never seen someone find it repulsive before, leave alone if that someone is your partner of 3 years (unless they simply just hate pet names). I'm bringing up this random funfact because I feel somewhat guilty for this entire fandom stir, as it was my ask that OP was responding to 😔😔😔. 2/2
OH YOU'RE RIGHT!!! thanks for the correction! i forgot about that particular instance in act 3; it's been a while since my da2 pts, im currently redoing an origins run for Mood for my wip lol
hopefully this doesnt stir more stuff bc im content to let it lie now (like im annoyed but ive already blocked op so whatever), but i'll place the next bits after a cut just in case
for context: when he calls you the one bright light in his life in act 3, it's after the quest, justice, where he's setting things up for act 3's finale. specifically, that quest starts with him giving his valuables away to varric -- a clear indication of his suicidality/expectation that he's going to die by the end of this. he tells you, on the friendship romance route, you are the most important thing in my life, but some things are more important than my life. the entire speech is him trying to explain himself in a roundabout way, so that when things play out, you don't blame yourself for his actions or for not stopping him, so that you don't think you didn't matter to him at all/never mattered, because you did. he tells you, "you are the one bright light in my life. never blame yourself for what will happen." after like. four years together. seven years of knowing each other. he thinks he's going to die -- and in some pts, DOES die -- and he tries to make sure you know that you were really, truly loved, that he meant everything he said to you about caring for you, that this relationship mattered to him. like... every time that quest plays, i have to pause and take a breather or else i'm going to cry. lit just thinking about it makes my heart hurt.
i genuinely can't see how it's manipulative, or toxic? is it just me??? this is literally his goodbye to you, unless you spare him in the end and he goes with you to the gallows. this is what he wants his last words to be to you; a reminder that he loves you and that you shouldn't blame yourself for his actions.
i have similar petnames in my mother tongue, too. and i agree re: it being the most loving term of endearment. (u should also. Drop the term of endearment. if u want. so we can collectively adopt it for a/nders.) but the way OP phrased it doesn't seem to indicate any issues with petnames but rather the fact he said it at all which is really...
it's just really... aggravating? weird? idk? to me that this person cherry-picked it as "he calls you the one bright light in his life which is soooo toxic"
........ like. the implication here is that it's toxic because he's depressed? and depressed, suicidal people who tell you that you're the only thing keeping them going is some kind of.. terrible, awful manipulation tactic and not a desperate cry for IMMEDIATE help? as though he's holding his mental state over you, threatening you with it in order to get compliance or something? like if this is the friendship romance route, it's so weird that the apparent critique here is that anders... expects you to care about him/and cares about you? they just like. ignored the entire context around both times. even in my first blind da2 pt (my first romance was bela), when i got to that scene, i IMMEDIATELY felt concern on his behalf not alarm that he was somehow manipulating me?
and most of the post is like that. just... cherry-picking random things and blowing them out of proportion/making it out to be something he's not. like the entire post was just... shitting on an/ders for being a romance option? like. if you hate all the romantic aspects of the andersmance, you literally have four whole other options for a romance -- and we already know exactly who op prefers because they can't seem to stop themselves from constantly comparing the two romances, or rather, specifically, using the apparent "toxicity" of h/anders to prop up fe/nhawke -- like. go romance someone else then lol
also. i dont think you should feel guilty for anything. its kinda obv from OP's post that they'd had this in their mind for a long while (even tho it's not a fresh take by any stretch of the imagination) bc i saw other posts on my dash that i rolled my eyes at from them w similar phrasing for how they believed h/anders was toxic [in comparison to f/enhawke] & the implication that h/anders was somehow inherently inferior to f/enhawke as a ship. so. ultimately, disappointed but not surprised. this was likely inevitable the moment their blog gained traction by interacting w proa/nders blogs & content lol
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s3r-en-d1p-ity · 5 years ago
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just friends (pt. 2) - t. chalamet x reader
really no one asked for a part 2 but I had it in my drafts then one person asked so here, one person that I love dearly :) @eternaleviee​
pairing: reader x timotheé chalamet
warnings: swearing, mentions of the hanky panky
part 1 , part 3
lil recap: just a background, how they met, the beginning of their friendship, when y/n had a lil crush on timo
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It was tearing you apart. Eating at your insides, making you feel all guilty inside. You’ve been telling yourself all these years that your crush on TimotheĂ© had vanished, but in reality, it had grown stronger and you didn’t even realize it.
How didn’t you realize it? You aren’t sure. You told yourself the butterflies in your stomach was the happiness of seeing your best friend. 
You were in love with Timotheé, and you couldn't ignore or deny it anymore. And it was all because of a little comment. A stupid comment on an Instagram post of you two.
the way they look at each other... y/n looks at him like he puts the stars in her sky.
“Like he puts the stars in her sky.” That made it all the more complex, but much more sense. TimotheĂ© did put the stars in her sky. He put the happiness in her life. The hope.
You were brought out of your thoughts when Timotheé tugged on your wrist, pulling you down Hollywood Boulevard. The simple touch sent jolts up her arm and shivers down her spine.
“I don’t understand why I had to get so dressed up.” You grumbled, looking down at your black dress and heels. “Aren’t we just meeting our friends?”
“Yeah, but we’re going to Chateau Marmont and there’s someone I’d like you to meet.” He grinned over his shoulder. Your heart dropped in your stomach, and you felt sick.
The last time he said that, you met Reilyn. His controlling, invasive ex-girlfriend that stole all of his time. There was someone else, now.
You sighed and put on a fake smile, nodding. You wished you never read that comment. Maybe you wouldn’t feel so sick to your stomach right now.
You arrived at the restaurant and Timotheé spoke to a waiter before following him to a booth in the very back, in a different room then everyone else. You saw your whole friend group, and an unfamiliar girl sitting next to (y/b/f). Everyone looked up when you two arrived, and the unfamiliar girl got up and smiled at Timotheé, pressing a kiss to his cheek.
I should’ve stayed in bed. You thought, scanning her. She had shoulder length blonde hair, beautiful facial structure, and perfect height.
She turned to you, and held out a hand. “Hi, I’ve heard about you a lot. Timo talks about you all the time.” She smiled politely.
Funny, I haven’t heard a word about you. You looked over at TimotheĂ©, seeing him stare at the both of you nervously. You were the only person who ever called him Timo.
“It’s nice to meet you...” You went on, gesturing for her name.
Something flashed in her eyes, and her gaze flickered to TimotheĂ© for a short second. He hung his head and she looked back over at you. “Lily.”
“Nice to meet you, Lily.” You smiled, shaking her hand. She smiled back and returned back to her seat. You sat at the open seat next to one of your friends and got lost in conversation, but couldn’t shake the thought of Lily and TimotheĂ© out of your mind.
“I think you should tell him.” Harry shrugged, taking a sip of his tea.
You and Harry Styles had been friends for a while. You collaborated on a song and continued to be very good friends after that, and you often went to each other for advice.
“He’s dating Lily.” You reminded him, furrowing your eyebrows.
“I know. But if he never told you about her and he always talks about you, there’s something going on. Tell him, y/n/n. YOLO.” Harry smiled, nudging your hand that was resting on the table at the small cafe you were at.
You looked up from your cup, narrowing your eyes. “Never say that again.” You tried not to laugh. He laughed, which only made you laugh.
“Just promise me you’ll try.” He realized you weren't going to tell him. You sighed, and nodded.
“I’ll try.”
Nope. Nope. You weren't going to tell him. You went over to his place in hopes that he was alone, but as soon as you got to the door you heard the moans and headboard slapping.
That was almost a week ago, and you couldn't get the noises out of your mind. You missed being on tour and being occupied every second so you had no time to overthink anything. Now, you were doubting everything.
A few days after the... incident, you went out for coffee with Lily and Timotheé, determined to force yourself to like her. There was nothing not to like, except for the fact she was dating him.
You proved yourself wrong. The whole time, she was glaring at you while Timotheé tried to engage in conversation. When he got up to go get another coffee, she was off on a rant about how you were obsessed with Timotheé and that you needed to stay away. As soon as Timmy came back, you said your goodbyes quickly and rushed out of the cafe, your blood boiling.
It took a week for Timotheé to realize you were acting strange. He walked in unannounced to your apartment just in time to see your regular fuck buddy, Jack come out.
He was pulling his t-shirt over his head, and once it was over his torso, TimotheĂ© could see that he was panting. His eyes snapped up him, and he nodded. “Sup, dude.” Jack breathed out, smiling at him before leaving the apartment.
TimotheĂ© felt his heart clench and he rolled his eyes. He wanted to like Jack, he really did, but he couldn’t bring himself too. He sighed and walked to your bedroom, where you were getting back into bed.
“What did you forget, Jack?” You sighed, your back facing him. You climbed under the covers and then you noticed TimotheĂ© standing by the door, wearing a jean jacket, a graphic tee, and grey sweatpants. “Oh. It’s you.”
TimotheĂ© scoffed. “Yeah, it’s me. Sorry to disappoint.” He said, his voice dripping with sarcasm. “Not happy to see me?”
You shrugged, but your insides were going crazy. Push back all the feelings. Don’t let him know. “Nice girlfriend.” Was all you said, pulling the covers up to your chin.
“This is about Lily.” He acknowledged. “I don't understand. Every time I get a girlfriend, you hate her. What’s wrong with you? Why won't you let me be happy?” You scoffed, turning over to look at him. “Let you be happy? That’s exactly what I’m trying to do! Every time you bring a girl near me, she automatically sees me as a threat. That’s why I stay away, so I don’t fuck up whatever is happening. I know you like Lily, and that’s why I haven’t been talking to you! She hates me, so I hate her. Just don’t bring her near me and we’ll be good.” You went off, throwing your hands up in the air at the end.
Timmy didn’t say anything, just raised his eyebrows. You stared at him, waiting for a response.
“...Sounds like you have a crush on me.” He shrugged, smirking at you.
Your heart sped up, afraid that he had caught you. Now everything was ruined. But you were going to do your best to deny it. “Grow the fuck up, TimotheĂ©. This isn’t 2nd grade. I’m trying to be a good person.” You growl, laying back down and turning your back to him.
It was quiet, again. Then, you felt Timmy’s hands on your back, pushing you over. Then he was climbing in next to you, and he wrapped an arm around you. “Don’t be mad at me, please.” He mumbled, his forehead resting on your back.
God, curse you for falling for this scrawny, adorable, stubborn boy that is Timotheé Chalamet.
“I told you, I’m not mad at you.” You grumbled, trying to ignore the goosebumps on your skin from the arm that rested just below your breasts.
“You are. You’re just not admitting it,” He mumbled, his lips brushing against your skin with every word. The small action sent chills down your entire body. You couldn’t take this anymore. You thought you were going to explode if you didn't tell him.
“God damnit, TimotheĂ©.” You whined, sitting up. You looked behind you to see TimotheĂ© still laying down, staring at you. “How fucking oblivious can you be? How could you not see? Or maybe you did, and you’re doing this on purpose.” You shook your head, getting up.
“Slow down, y/n/n. What the fuck is going on?” Timmy furrowed his eyebrows. You rolled your eyes, crossing your arms.
“I’m fucking in love with you, TimotheĂ©. I have been for years. You were too blind to see and I was too scared to tell. Are you happy now? You can get rid of me and go see your precious girlfriend. I’m staying away because I’m jealous, god.” You spilt out, not caring anymore. You kept your eyes anywhere but Timothee’s face.
“Y/n.” TimotheĂ© said.
You sighed. “How hard is it for you to understand? I’m waiting. Just break my heart and leave.” 
Your eyes finally landed on Timotheé only to see him centimeters away from your face. Then, he was leaning in and kissing you.
The feeling felt nothing like you thought it would. You thought it would bring butterflies to your stomach and make you feel all giddy, but it just ignited the flame inside you even more and your whole body felt like an oven. You didn’t realize you were kissing back until your fingers were tugging at his hair.
Your lips moved sloppily, but with so much passion. The way Timotheé’s hands fisted your shirt said it all. You were sure after this, there was no way you were going to be able to let him leave.
He was pulling you closer and closer to him, until there was no room in between you two. But then, his phone started ringing.
He told you to ignore it, but you shook your head and pulled away from him, using all your self restraint to do so. You were breathing heavily and so was he as he grabbed his phone, to see the contact name on the screen.
Lily.
so... part 3? idk. only if y'all wanna see it. this really did suck and I wanted to make it longer but I am a very shittayyyy writer.
check out my other stories here !! this is my first timo imagine, so there are no others for him unfortunately! I have written one piece for sweet pea from Riverdale and 2 for Kian Lawley :)
hope u all enjoy ur day!!! luv u <3
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kdthecactuswizard · 5 years ago
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Feelings Suck pt.1
Series: Coming Undone
AU: Dahlia is Gay
Pairing: Dahlia X Tyler
Warnings: Queer Questioning
The dark haired witch glances around the halls, as everyone is suffering under Umbridge's rule. It couldn't be any later than early afternoon, but Dahlia was already exhausted. Most days she would be running a muck with Fred and George, but today she couldn't keep her mind straight.
Literally. 
Her eyes kept flying to Tyler beside her, her platinum blonde hair silky smooth with gorgeous shining grey eyes. She was once again going off on a rant about how much she likes Harry, and with every word out of her mouth Dahlia felt her heart breaks a little more.
She's been dealing with these thoughts for months, but she usually just pushed them aside, telling herself she liked George instead. She was dating him, after all. 
But every time they would kiss Dahlia would imagine she was kissing Tyler's soft lips instead of George rougher ones. When George would put his arm around her shoulders and leaning down on her, she'd imagine it was Tyler instead.
Dahlia tried to ignore the thoughts, but today they seemed more intrusive than usual. Every little thought that came to Dahlias head were something about how great Tyler looked, or how much she wanted to hug and kiss her.
But yet, Dahlia knows this would never happen. She's with George, and Tylers been pining after Harry ever since she met him in her first year. But ignoring them would do nothing for her. She needed to talk them out with someone.
Dahlia absentmindedly said goodbye to Tyler, who had Arithmancy, while Dahlia went off to an Astronomy class. 
Thankfully, Hadie was in her next class. Hadie was the expert on anything not straight, and having an excuse to talk with her one on one would make this whole thing a little easier.
Dahlia stepped into Astronomy, yawning. Now that her mind wasn't distracted by Tyler every 2 seconds, she was exhuasted from her astronomy class last night at 2am. She had decided that reading was more important than going back to sleep. Thank god this was her only class today.
She walked to the front of the class, to where Hadie was sitting with her arms crossed and her head in her hands. Dahlia yawned as she sat down besides the exhausted Hufflepuff.
The whole class was basically asleep at this point, except this one quiet ravenclaw in the back who Dahlia was 90% sure was a vampire. Dahlia shook Hadie awake. Hadie swatted her hand away, but Dahlia stopped, and came down and whispered to her.
"I think I'm gay." Dahlia whispers. Hadie sits straight up immidently, with a huge smile on her face.
"You are?" Hadie yells, a bunch of people grumbling and complaining under their breath. Dahlia glances aside, her face red. Hadie blinks, seeming to finally registering it. Hadie leans in, and lowers her voice to a whisper.
"Wait, aren't you dating George?" Hadie whispers. Dahlia nods slowly.
"I feel so bad about it, but ever since we got back from winter break I can't get Tyler out of my head. I feel like I've been lying to George for months, but I don't have the heart to break up with him." Dahlia begins to ramble. Hadie sighs, as she sets her wand down on the table.
"Well first if you really think your gay, maybe you should break up with him. I'm sure George would understand if you told him." Hadie says with a yawn.
"I know, but Fred says he's had a thing for me since like two years ago. He's completly hooped." Dahlia mumbles.
"Yes, but how long are you going to keep this up? Are you going to marry him, and have kids with him just so you won't break his heart?" Hadie asks.
"No..." Dahlia trails off.
"There will never be a good time to tell him, he'll just have to understand and live with it." Hadie says with a shrug.
"But I-" Dahlia was cut off, by Proffesor Sinistra entering the classroom.
Everyone groaned as she walked in, and Hadie leaned over to whisper as Professor Sinistra began to speak.
"You can't pretend to be straight forever." Hadie says, before laying back down on the table.
"I can't." Dahlia mumbles to herself. She looks up to Professor Sinistra, talking about stars and junk. If only it was that easy.
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sincerely-us-imagines · 6 years ago
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It’s all about the money, honey (pt 2) (connor murphy x reader)
alternatively titled “it’s not about the money, honey”
Part 1 is here
I got a lot of good feedback on part 1 so thank you so so so much for that!!
It’s almost 1 am and I have to be up in like 6 hours and there is no way in hell im proofing this tonight lmao
also this is seriously 10 pages long i’m soRRY ITS A LOT
warnings: swearing, a teeny tiny bit of angst, asshole cousins i think thats it? also i tossed in some of my personal hc’s for evan oops
“So does this mean you’re done prostituting yourself out to Murphy?” Jared asked after you told him what went down Friday night.
Evan shot Jared a disproving look.
“I’m not a prostitute, Jared. I was just--”
“Getting paid for the “girlfriend experience” by someone who can’t get laid?” he popped a baby carrot into his mouth. Evan and Jared were the only two who actually knew what was going on between you and Connor. And sometimes you regretted telling the latter. Like right now, for instance.
“I never slept with him, Jared. I never even kissed him. The most I ever did was like, hold his hand.”
“Somehow that’s even more pathetic on his behalf.”
“So what are you going to do now?” Evan asked, ignoring Jared completely.
“I don’t know. He’ll probably make up a story to tell his parents why we broke up.” you tried to sound nonchalant about the entire thing. You barely tolerated each other away from his family, so why did this feel like the end of an actual relationship?
“Uh oh,” Evan said, eyes locked behind you.
“Well speak of the goddamn devil.” Jared laughed.
You turned around to see Connor approaching you from behind. He looked horrible. There were deep purple circles under his eyes and his hair was a frizzy unwashed mess. You pushed down any feeling of pity you had for him as he walked up to you.
“I need to talk to you.” he said.
“Just tell them we broke up. It doesn’t need to be a discussion.”
Evan shifted uncomfortably across from you while Jared watched on, clearly amused.
“I don’t want to-- just. Please, can we talk?”
You sighed and gestured to the seat beside you.
“Fine.”
Connor eyed your friends.
“Away from them?”
You rolled your eyes but picked up your bag nonetheless.
“I’ll see you guys in econ.” you told them, giving a small wave before following Connor to an empty lunch table in the back corner of the cafeteria.
“Look, Y/n, I’m really sorry. You were just trying to play along and do what you thought would be best. I shouldn’t have snapped at you.”
“It’s fine.” you shrugged it off as if it were nothing. As if you totally hadn’t cried yourself to sleep Friday night after you got home, or spent all of Saturday at Evan’s place ranting about it.
“It isn’t. I was an asshole and you didn’t deserve it.”
“Yeah, you really were.” you agreed. His jaw clenched and he took a deep breath. It brought you a small sense of satisfaction to know you got on his nerves.
“If you’re still willing, I want us to keep
 doing this,” he gestured between the two of you and took a deep breath, as if what he would say next was going to hurt him.
“And for you to come with me to my cousin’s wedding.”
You blinked at him, a bit taken aback.
“You
 You actually want me to go? You can just tell your family I’m busy that day or something.”
“No, I, uh,” he sighed, “I want you to go. I don’t want to be alone with my family.” He looked down and began to pick at his chipped nail polish. “Things, um, they aren’t as bad when you’re there.”
You couldn’t help the smile that spread across your face.
“Aww Connie,” you cooed and poked his cheek, “do you like having me around?”
He flushed pink and swatted your hand away.
“No! You just
 don’t always totally suck to be around.”
You put a hand over your chest in an exaggerated manner.
“Oh Con, that is the sweetest thing anyone has ever said to me!”
“Oh shut the fuck up,” he grumbled, rolling his eyes at you, “And don’t call me ‘Con’.”
“If you say so, Lawrence.” you shrugged, smirking.
He only ignored you.
“So we’re cool?” He asked, glancing over at you.
“We are.”
“Okay so the wedding is the 1st of next month. It starts at 3 but it’s like an hour away so i’ll be there at around 12:30 so we’ll have time to get gas and maybe stop and get a drink for the road and still get there a little early.”
“Got it.” You nodded, punching the information into your phone’s calendar.
“Cool.” He stood up to leave but stopped. “Also, uh, do you maybe wanna come over for dinner thursday? My mom said she’ll make that casserole thing you like.”
“They asked me back already?” you were kind of surprised. It was usually every other week you came over.
Connor was quiet for a few seconds while he adjusted the strap on his messenger bag.
“Uh, yeah. They did.” he wasn’t looking at you. “I’ll see you in science, yeah?”
“Of course.” you answered, a little confused by his behavior.
He mumbled a goodbye and headed off, leaving you wondering what the hell was going on with him.
The last couple weeks of the month flew by and the 1st came up sooner than you’d expected. You were ready at 12, having had Evan come over to help you with your hair. He was actually really good at, which was surprising with how bad his hands shake. He said he learned to braid in boy scouts when he was little and used to do his mom’s hair all the time when he was younger. You’d have to ask him is he would do your hair for prom, too.
You wondered if Connor would ask you to prom. Just to appease his parents, of course. It would only make sense for a boyfriend-- a fake boyfriend- to ask his fake girlfriend to their senior prom. It’s all fake, Y/n. you remind yourself. He doesn’t actually care about you like that.
You shook the thoughts from your head and straightened out your outfit, a pretty swing dress with a  lace overlay. Connor pulled up at 12:15 and just kind of
 sat in the driveway. After watching him from your bedroom window for a couple minutes you went downstairs to say goodbye to your mother (who was quite excited for you to be going on a “date”. And kept giving you that knowing Mom Look) and headed outside towards Connor’s car.
You approached the door and looked inside to see him sitting there, scrolling through his phone. You knocked on the window and he jumped, looking over at the window with wide eyes. He unlocked the door and you climbed in, laughing at him.
“Why were you just sitting in the driveway?” you asked, pulling on your seatbelt
“I was early and I didn’t want to bother you, so I was just going to wait until 12:30 to text you.”
“Since when do you care about bothering me? That’s, like, all you do.” You looked over at Connor to find his eyes fixed on you. You shifted uncomfortably and adjusted your dress.
“Uh, Connor? Is something wrong?”
“Yeah.” You tilted your head in confusion at him. “I mean- no. No, nothing’s wrong.”
He turned back to face forward and put the car in reverse, backing out of your driveway,
“Okay
 Well, um, you look really nice.” you told him. And it was the truth. He had his long curls pulled back into a bun, wearing black dress pants and oxfords with a maroon suit jacket over a pink shirt with a tasteful floral print tie. It was a very classic look, but with a fun twist. And it looked great on him.
“Zoe said I look like a bellhop.” he grumbled. You couldn’t help but laugh.
“You don’t.” you assured him, “You look really, really handsome, Connor.”
The tips of his ears turned pink at your compliment.
“Thanks. You look okay too, I guess.” he said in a teasing tone.
“Asshole!” you laughed, hitting him lightly on the arm.
“I’m kidding, Christ!” he laughed too. “Really though, you look great.”
“Thank you, Connor.” you smiled and rolled your eyes, trying to fight the heat rising in your cheeks.
Connor pulled into the 7-Eleven down the street from your house, parking beside a pump and turning the car off.
“You want anything?” he asked as he opened the door.
“Nah, I’m good.”
“Nothing?”
“No, Connor. Thank you though.”
He shrugged and shut the door and you waited until he was in the building before pulling out your phone and snapping a picture of yourself, sending it to the group chat with Jared and Evan.
Jare-Bear: damn. hot mama.
Ev: you look great!
Ev: you sprayed your hair again before you left right?
You: yes, ev
You: thank you
Jare-Bear: evan ur gay
Ev: only half
Ev: ish
Jare-Bear: whats connor wearing
Jare-Bear: a trenchcoat and bandolier?
Ev: jared, thats not funny
You: can you not be an asshole for like 2 minutes?
You: he looks really good, actually
Ev: think you can get a picture with him?
Jare-Bear: why? So u can have material to jack off to both murphy siblings
Ev: shut the hell up
You glanced up from your phone to see Connor walking back towards the car with a plastic bag.
You: gtg
You: message you guys later <3
Ev: okay have fun!
Jare-Bare: use condoms
You stuff your phone in your purse and watch Connor leans against the car as he pumps the gas. He tugs the little curls at the nape of his neck, the ones that wouldn’t fit into the bun, twisting them around his finger and letting them spring free. A nervous habit, you assume. A replacement for his usual compulsion of running his hand through his hair, probably. Why do you know that? That’s so weird that you like, consciously recognize that. What the hell--
The nozzle clicks and you quickly turn to look straight ahead, pretending like you hadn’t just been analyzing his behavior.
He opened the door and folded himself into the driver’s seat, starting up the car. Once getting situated, he opened the center console and pulled out a bottle of hand sanitizer, squirting a few pumps into his hands and rubbing them together.
“What?” he asked when he realized you were looking at him.
“Nothing.”
“Do you have any idea how dirty gas pumps are?”
“I don’t suppose I do.”
“Well, they’re fucking filthy.”
“I believe you.” you couldn’t help the amused grin spreading across your face.
“Then what’s so goddamn funny?” he was pretending to be angry, but you could tell he was fighting back a smile.
“You’re just so
” Please don’t say it. Don’t fucking say it, y/n.
“I’m so
?”
Cute. You’re fucking cute, Connor, okay? Everything you’ve done today has been unbearably adorable and I can’t stand it.
“We should go.” you say instead, glancing at the clock on the dashboard.
He eyed you suspiciously but didn’t say anything.
“Okay, but first,” he dug around in the plastic bag and handed you a bottle of water and a pack of M&M’s. You looked down at them and then back up at him.
“I know you said you didn’t want anything but I thought since it’s kind of a long drive you might
 y’know, change your mind or something.” his voice suddenly changed from it’s half bashful tone to something a little stronger, but still light. “And I’m not about to pull over for you to go get a snack or some shit. So really it’s in my best interest, y’know. Just so I don’t have to hear you whine.”
“Sure.” you smile, taking a sip of water
“Whatever.” there’s a ghost of a smile on his lips as he pulls out onto the road.
“Thank you, Connor. Really.”
Connor turns on the radio in favor of answering you.
Connor pulls into the parking lot of a rather large synagogue roughly an hour later. He finds a parking spot near his parents’ SUV.
“Holy shit,” you say, getting out of the car and admiring the architecture of the building. Connor snorted as he rounded the car to come get you.
“Oh, oops.” you covered your mouth, realizing what you’d just said.
“You are such a dork.” Connor smiled, holding his arm out for you to take.
“Shut up.” you laughed, nudging him.
Inside the synagogue you met up with Cynthia, Larry, Zoe, and their grandmother, who greeted you both with a big hug and kiss. and found your seats. You talked easily to Connor and Zoe until more people began filing in, filling up the pews. The ceremony was simple yet beautiful, and the bride’s dress was utterly breathtaking. You didn’t know them, sure, but you did tear up a bit (which made Connor smirk and poke you in the side).
After the ceremony and before the reception, Connor, after being instructed to by his parents, bashfully introduced you to some of his other family, all of whom commented on either how well Connor did or how beautiful you were. Except for one cousin.
He seemed to be a few years younger than you, maybe 15 or so. Connor immediately tensed when he saw him approach. He looked over towards his parents, almost like a scared kid would, but they were too wrapped up in a conversation with some third time removed somebody to even notice.
“Hey, hey! Larry Junior! How’s it going?” the kid said, clapping a hand over Connor’s shoulder.
“Don’t call me that.” Connor said, glaring at him, and taking a step back to escape his cousin’s grasp.
The kid put his hands up in mock-surrender.
“No need for aggression, buddy. Don’t need a repeat of your 6th grade summer, do we?”
You glanced up at Connor in confusion.
“Oh he didn’t tell you?” the kid continued, “He had to go to, what was it called, Connor?”
“You need to shut up. Now.” Connor growled.
Connor was at least a head taller than this kid, and one of the most intimidating people you’d ever met. Why wasn’t he scared?
“Oh yeah!” the kid snapped, “”Behavioral Correction Camp”! He didn’t tell you that, did he?”
You stayed quiet, chewing on the inside of your mouth anxiously.
“Anyway,” he continued after getting no response for you, “how long have you been dating this charming cousin of mine?”
“Three and a half months.” you said, grabbing Connor’s hand protectively.
“And what exactly are you doing with him?”
“What?”
“Why are you with him? We thought Connor would never get a girlfriend. He was such a problem child, freaked out over every little thing, threw tantrums.” the kid laughed a little, “Hell, the reason he had to go to Batshit Crazy Camp was because he beat the shit out of me when we were younger, isn’t that right?”
Connor was absolutely fuming. You could feel his hand shaking in yours. His jaw was clenched so tight it was a wonder his teeth didn’t just shatter. He was using a lot of self control right now, that much was evident.
“You wanna know why I’m with him?” you asked, squeezing Connor’s hand tighter, “Not that I owe you any kind of answer. I’m with him because he’s sweet and thoughtful. He cares about me and my feelings and my wellbeing. He’s got a great sense of humor and he gets me. He makes me feel like no one else can. He can be gentle despite everything he’s been through, despite what people like you say to him, and he admits when he’s wrong and he’s trying. He tries so hard to be a good person. And he is a good person. And that’s a lot more than I can say about you.” You didn’t realize you were crying until you finished talking. You wiped your eyes on the back of your free hand before tugging him towards the big wooden doors out to the parking lot.
“The reception is in half an hour, you two! We’ll meet you there!” you hear Cynthia shout cheerfully as you leave the building.
You walked to the car, not letting go of Connor’s hand until it was absolutely necessary.
Once inside, you pulled down the visor and looked in the mirror, wiping at your eyes with a napkin from your purse, doing your best not to smear your makeup. You took a swallow of water from the bottle he bought you earlier before taking a calming breath.
“I’m sorry.” you told him, shaking your head. “I-I didn’t mean to--”
“Y/n, shh. He grabbed your hand and laced his fingers through yours. “Thank you. For saying all that. You didn’t have to do that.”
“What was I supposed to do? Just stand there and let him insult you? Connor, you’re my--” you cut yourself off. He wasn’t your boyfriend. He wasn’t really your friend, either. That doesn’t mean what you said wasn’t true, though. “I care about you.” you finished, looking out the window.
“I care about you too.”
“Shut up.” you smiled, not looking at him.
“Wanna head towards the hotel for the reception?” Connor asked, removing his hand from yours. You nodded and he put the car in gear.
You pulled out your phone and opened your group chat.
You: shit you guys
You: this is bad
Ev: ????
Jare-Bear: did he hurt you
You: no
You: i think i like him
Ev: really?
Ev: like, LIKE like?
Jare-Bear: gay
Ev: hey jared?
Jare-Bear: ya
Ev: shut up
Ev: for once in your life
You: yeah
You: i think so
Jare-Bear: i thought you had better taste than that
You: shut up
Ev: shut up
Ev: just be happy for her
Ev: unless youre about to like
Ev: profess your undying love for her
Ev: then its really not your business
You: thank you ev <3
Jare-Bear: i think shes just in denial u know
Jare-Bear: using murphy as a distraction from her lifelong crush on me
Jare-Bear: its okay u can tell me
You: lmao
Jare-Bear: rude
You: thats me
You put your phone on silent so it wouldn’t constantly buzz with Jared and Evan’s inevitable bickering.
“You want something to drink?” Connor shouted over the music. The reception turned out to be one hell of a party. There was tons of food and drinks, flashing lights and balloons and streamers and a massive dance floor, and it was loud. Really loud. It was kind of like prom, but with a lot of old people.
You nodded and gave him a thumbs up in confirmation. He got up and wandered off towards the far wall where the refreshments were.
You made small talk with Zoe until he came back.
He handed you a clear plastic cup full of what you assumed to be sparkling cider, and clinked his own against it in a toast. You smiled and took a sip. You froze, eying him as you swallowed.
“Connor,” you said slowly, “Is this alcohol?”
“Yup.” he grinned, taking a big swallow from him own cup. You didn’t bother asking questions. You didn’t really care how he got it.
You laughed and talked about nothing in particular for a while.
“Oh, I like this song.” you commented absently as the first few notes played over the speakers. Connor stood up pulled off his jacket, laying over the back of the chair, and held his hand out.
“Dance with me?” he asked.
“What?” you almost laughed.
“Will you dance with me?”
“I don’t know how.” you admitted.
“I’ll show you.”
“You can dance?”
“Is that so surprising?” he feigned offense.
“I mean, yeah.” you laughed.
“Just come on, jerk.”
He took your hand and lead you towards the center of the dance floor.
“Okay, now put your hand here.” he placed your hand on his shoulder. “And I put mine here.” He rested his hand over your hip and you felt heat rise in your cheeks.
“And then we just,” he began stepping in a simple pattern. You picked up quickly and were able to keep up, only stepping on his toes a few times. It got easier with each song.
A slower paced oldies song came on and you laughed as he spun you around out of tune with the song, the skirt of your dress flaring out in a big circle around you. You came to a halt in front of him, stumbling a bit as you regained your balance. He held tight to your waist to keep you upright. A wide, crooked smile was stretched across his angular face as he looked down at you. You couldn’t help but smile back. He continued to sway you to the beat of the music.
“Thank you for coming with me tonight. You really didn’t--”
“Hush.” you smiled. “I’m having fun.”
“I am too.”
You leaned your head against his shoulder and he snaked his arm from your hip to your lower back.
“Oh!” you said, pulling back after a couple of minutes. “I told Evan I’d send him a picture of us together. Is that okay?”
“Oh. Uh, yeah. Sure.”
You hurried back over to the table and grabbed your phone, ignoring the flood of messages from Jared and Evan arguing, and opened up your camera. You took different pictures and chose a random one to send to Evan and Jared and promptly shoved your phone back in your bag.
You stayed a couple more hours, dancing and eating and having a good time with Connor, before you decided it was probably time to go home.
“Hey, Y/n. Come on, wake up.” Connor was shaking you gently.
“What?” you yawned, sitting up straight. “Oh god my neck hurts like a bitch,” you groaned, massaging the aforementioned area.
“Yeah, I bet. You fell asleep with it at like a 90 degree angle.”
“Ugh
 wait. I slept the entire way home?”
“Yup. And you snored too.”
“I did not!” you gasped.
“Totally did.” he laughed, nodding. “Full on sawing logs over there.”
“Shut up oh my God.” you rubbed sleepily at your eyes, forgetting all about your makeup. “What time is it?” another yawn forced its way out of your mouth.
“Half past one.”
“In the morning?!”
“No, it’s just after lunch, Y/n.” Connor replied sarcastically.
You rolled your eyes and stretched out, grabbing your bag from the floorboard.
“Can I walk you up?” Connor asked. You nodded.
He walked around to your side of the car and opened the door for you. Your heels made you a  bit unsteady on your feet, having just woken up, so Connor looped his arm around your waist as he walked you to your front door.
You began digging through you bag for your keys, swearing under your breath at the ungodly amount of junk in your bag.
When you successfully found them and looked back up Connor was holding at least half a dozen twenties.
“No.” you shook your head, pushing the money away.
“Y/n-”
“No, Connor. I don’t want you to pay me.”
“We had a deal, Y/n.”
“Please, Connor, I’m too tired to argue. I had an amazing time with you today. I don’t need your money; it was my pleasure. Really.”
Connor hesitated before putting the money back in his wallet, still looking unsure.
“I, um. I don’t want you to pay me anymore.” you told him. “When we hang out. I
 I like just being with you. If you want me to keep being your fake girlfriend or whatever around your family, that’s fine but
 I don’t want you to give me money for it. I meant what I said to your cousin.”
Connor stared at you for a moment before speaking.
“I don’t want you to be my fake girlfriend anymore.”
Oh. That’s okay, Y/n. It’s fine. You freaked him out by saying that and he has literally no obligation to stay around you if he doesn’t want to.
“That, um, that’s fine. It’s totally your decision. Uh, whatever you wanna tell your parents happened is fine just-”
“I don’t want you to be my fake girlfriend.” Connor interrupted, grabbing your hand. “Maybe I could take you out next weekend? Like on a real date?”
Your stomach fluttered and you nodded a bit too fast.
“Yes! Yes I
 yes. That would be amazing. I-I’d really really like that.”
“Okay.” he grinned.
“Okay.”
“Cool.”
“Yeah.”
“I should, uh, I should get home.” he gestured with his thumb at his car.
“Yeah, totally.” you couldn’t wipe the dopey grin off your face.
Connor headed to his car and you began to unlock the front door.
“Oh!” he called just before you stepped inside, “Can you send me those pictures?”
You nodded and he gave a thumbs up.
You snuck inside as quietly as you could, creeping into your room and shutting the door softly. You stripped off your dress and hung it up before pulling on a big t-shirt to sleep in and using a makeup wipe in a half-assed attempt to wash your face. You were too tired to go all the way across the hall to the bathroom. Your skin would give you hell, yeah, but that’s a problem for future you. So is the rat’s nest your hair will be when you wake up in the morning without brushing it out but you really couldn’t be bothered right now.
You climbed under your covers and unlocked your phone, seeing messages Jared and Evan had sent in response to the pitcture.
Jare-Bear: shit dude
Jare-Bear: hes got it bad for u
Ev: he really does
Ev: look at the way he’s looking at you
You tapped the picture to make it bigger. You were smiling at the camera, head tilted slightly to the side, while Connor watched you with soft eyes and a gentle smile. He looked happy just being there beside you.
You forwarded the picture to Connor and sent a quick goodnight message before settling into your bed, smiling even as you drifted off to sleep.
167 notes · View notes
minnochu · 7 years ago
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Lustrous (pt 4)
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Hybrid!Kook x Reader AU
Pt 1 | Pt 2 | Pt 3 | Pt 4 | Pt 5 | Pt 6 | Pt 7 | Pt 8 | Pt 9 | Pt 10 | Pt 11 | Pt 12 | Pt 13 | Pt 14 | Pt 15 | Pt 16 | Pt 17 | Pt 18 | Pt 19
(A/N): Ha ha... Hi guys.. it’s been a while. This week hasn’t been a good one for me, from my uti to me throwing up this morning, but laying around drowning myself in water made me want to be productive for once and had me writing (finally!). Although I really need to update Interference and Wonderwall, please accept this probably crappy update for Lustrous >~<
You sigh as you pick at your food when lunch time finally comes around. Thoughts flood your mind, just as it did the whole day so far, making it difficult to concentrate in class. So far you’ve gotten a few warnings in your classes for your dozing, but that’s the least of your concern. All you can think of is the night before and the events that had unfolded.
“I think it’s in your best interest that you stay away from me from now on,” Jungkook says with a stiff expression, unable to look you straight in the eye, “Yahiko-ssi is right, and your friend as well
 I only danger you.”
A grimace makes its way to your face as you continue to reminisce your conversation with the wolf-boy as he walked you home.
“I don’t think you are-!” you attempt to protest but you freeze when the taller boy turns fully towards you, almost chest-to-chest with you - looming over your shorter form.
A shadow casts over his handsome face, but fails to hide the menacing gleam of his eyes sparking that brilliant blue you’ve come to admire. You should be afraid, a small part of you screams get away from him, but another part of you is enamored by this boy as you step back to increase distance between you both.
“I’m not like any other monster you see at school (Y/n), I find that it’s in your best interest to just stay away from someone like me,” he growls, voice low before he turns away sharply and you notice the flare of his fluorescent irises fading and returning to it’s normal mocha brown.
Upon arriving at your home, Jungkook politely declined joining you and Yahiko for dinner, all through out his bull shit explanation he gave you a condescending look before bidding you both farewell. To Yahiko it might’ve been a casual see you later, but to you it was a goodbye-please-don’t-ever-talk-to-me-or-even-look-at-me-after-this kind of farewell.
Hyejin watches you with concern, your chopsticks scraping and poking at your fried rice.
“(Y/n),” she calls, repeating your name once again, this time much louder in hopes of catching your attention, however you continue to stare down at your food. Sighing, she leans over the table and nudges your shoulder slightly, causing you to flinch and look up surprised.
“Wha, oh Hyejin, whats up?”
With furrowed eyebrows, she nods her head towards your food, “I should be asking that to you, lunch is almost over and you haven’t eaten one bite of it.”
Her eyes squint at you and her mouth further turns downward when she recognizes the weariness in your eyes and the dark swells beginning to appear underneath them. “You haven’t gotten any sleep last night either, have you?”
Pouting in defeat, you nod guiltily, “Yeah
 not even a wink, there’s just too much on my mind at the moment.”
“Hey.. (Y/n), I’m not forcing you
 but if there’s anything I could do to help - you can come to me, rant, anything
 I’m here for you!” she smiles sweetly, warming your heart at her worry.
“Thanks.”
Once your last period comes around you’re officially exhausted and can’t wait to just head home and retire in bed. At this point your head is bobbing up and down as you slip in and out of sleep, unable to concentrate on your potions teacher’s lecture about various potions and their ingredients one could create from just the base mixture they’d made previously. You’d be so much more interested if you weren’t so sleepy and bothered by the ignorance of the boy sitting beside you.
He’s been giving you the cold shoulder the whole day, in the classes you both share, in the hallway, and even now. You caught him trying to persuade your teacher to change his seat, unluckily the proposition was inevitably rejected and he’d have to sit beside you. All day he hasn’t spared you one glance, and now you’re not in a mood to argue when you’re about ready to just slam your head onto the desk and sleep.
You don’t notice but Jungkook’s watching you from the corner of his eyes. Shifting to rest his chin on his palm, propped up on the desk, as he tilts his head slightly to better watch your tired self almost tip over when your elbow slides of the desk and your head, that was resting on your hand, follows its path. Immediately you awaken, blushing brightly as you glance around to see if anyone saw that. You catch Jungkook’s gaze, the minuscule smile - you presume - that had made its way across his lips disappearing as he snaps his head towards the front. You catch the light hue of pink dust across his cheeks, and you can’t help but find it adorable.
“You saw nothing,” you pout.
He shakes his head, not offering you one glance just as he has the whole day.
“Is this how it’s gonna be?” you further frown, crossing your arms over the desk and lay your head on them, “If I were to be honest, I don’t care if you’ve done that... I’ve felt nothing but safety around you, maybe that was then but this is now-”
“You don’t know anything,” he grits, eyes squinting down at you.
“That may be so, but I know that you’ve saved me from that wendigo - you having blue eyes shouldn’t change how I perceive you to be-”
Interrupting you, a book comes down upon your head lightly but strong enough to catch your attention. Your teacher wears a sarcastic smile, twitching in annoyance at the corners as she reprimands you for seemingly sleeping and having the audacity for talking during her lecture once again. The class laugh and giggle at your dilemma, the witches whispering amongst themselves rather loudly about your actions.
“Look at her, she’s just trying to catch Jeon’s attention.”
“What a hoe, with those looks?”
“It’s not even looks, she’s a mere human! Disgusting little beings, can’t believe we gotta go to school with them.”
“Nothing can sway the Jeon Jungkook, what makes her think she’s different?”
You ignore them as you receive yet another detention from your teacher. This time however, when you’re finished and she lets you free from the room, you’re not greeted by the wolf-boy standing outside the class. The wall is barren of his tall form leaning against it and you frown at this. It leaves you to walk home alone, having to face Yahiko’s questions of his whereabouts before you can finally collapse onto your bed.
For the next week, you’re losing hope in trying to catch Jungkook’s attention, finally giving in and doing as he wants you to: keep away from him. You pay him no heed, and decide to just do as he says.
“(Y/n)!”
You perk up beside Hyejin, both of you stopping when a familiar brunette calls out to you and catches you by your elbow. He freezes for moment, scrutinizing your friend before returning his attention to you.
“Jimin-ssi? Whats up?” you ask, glancing at Hyejin who is staring at the ground and waiting for you to finish whatever business you have with the wolf-boy.
He laughs lightly, waving his hand in dismissal at your formality, “Just Jimin is fine! But listen-” he steps closer to whisper for only you to hear “-I’m sorry about Jungkook’s behavior, but I assure you he’s a good boy! Just trust him please when he tells you to stay away from him - you’re a human, and like he said, he might endanger you so please keep that in mind!”
“Is it because I’m a human, you guys think I’m weak and could hurt me with a tap of your finger?” you retort back rather heatedly.
“Yes.. I-I mean no
 we-well partly!” he stutters, scratching the back of his head, “I don’t mean to offend you, but our Jungkookie is a special one
 we just don’t want you to get hurt.”
“Well he’s got what he’s been asking for already,” you sigh, “We have to head to class now Jimin, I’ll see you around I guess.”
Before you and Hyejin can leave, he stops you once more, “Wait, please, there’s nothing wrong with you, he’s just trying to think about your safety - please try to understand.”
I don’t think I can, you think as you nod and continue to your next class with Hyejin.
She glances at you as you both enter your class, taking your seats beside one another before you decides to speak up, “How do you know bangtan’s Jimin? You two seemed pretty close there.”
“Not really,” you laugh, quickly trying to come up with an excuse when there’s no way you can tell her it’s because you were with Jungkook, “I might’ve ran into him the other day while I was dozing off so
”
“Ah
 you should be more careful next time!” she giggles at your clumsiness, “I’m glad you’re much better now! I was really worried for you.”
“Haha yeah
”
You weren’t any better. Maybe you looked it, but you were still worrying about Jungkook and what it is that made him so dangerous. Curiosity would surely kill you one day. It was no use worrying your head over it to the point of insomnia and stress, but still you thought about it - especially when the guy sat next to you in your potions class.
Sighing, you stretch as you finally leave the school building. Unluckily, you were stopped by a desperate classmate with after school cleaning duty and you couldn’t find it in your heart to say no to her when she explained that she had a really important date with that cute guy on the soccer team. You’ve been trying to avoid leaving school so late when Jungkook is no longer there to walk you home, but it’s inevitable when you had to stay later than usual.
Fear has you locked in its grasps as you walk your usual route, the feeling the same as that day. That’s when you feel it. This aura, terrifyingly similar to that wendigo’s, but then it seems to multiply and it doubles. You suck in a breath, quickening your pace and lowering your head, hoping that it’s just your mind playing tricks due to the fear of what may lurk in the growing darkness as the sun begins to set.
Risking a peek back, you sigh in relief when there’s nothing to fear until you turn back towards your path and a little girl has appeared out of nowhere. You don’t remember hearing her footsteps approaching nor seeing her in the distance, but that is least of your concern when she’s sobbing and bawling. She notices you and latches to your leg immediately.
“Please miss! Please help me, they- they’re going to get me
 my mommy
 they already got her
” she sobs in between hiccups, her small fingers gripping onto the skirt of your uniform.
“They? Who are they?” you ask urgently, looking around for any signs of life until you’re propelled forward by your hand.
“Please,” she cries, tugging at your hand incessantly.
Rustling nearby startles you both, the girl cries “we must hurry!” before she leads the way in fleeing with you in tow. Your adrenaline rises as you whip in and out of neighborhoods, before she leads you both straight into an alley with a dead end.
Catching your breath, you sigh and turn back towards the opening of the alley. The hairs on your arms stand straight up when you recognize those glowing white eyes. Sucking in a breath you attempt to turn towards the little girl only to be stopped by claws digging painfully into your waist.
“My what a doll you are,” a female’s voice, different from the child’s, rang in your ear, “What a good taste you have brother.”
Curses, you thought, no wonder you felt the aura dividing, there was two of them.
“This time you won’t be getting away,” the one in front of you says, glaring menacingly as he bears his large and sharp teeth. You struggle against the both of them, but it’s no use when they’ve got supernatural strength over your puny non-existent abilities.
“Hurry up brother, I’d like to have a taste,” the girl behind you whines as she further digs her claws into your skin.
It hurts, it hurts, you chant as you squeeze your eyes closed, I’m going to die!
He snatches your wrist, sniffing your skin momentarily before his mouth parts and he’s sinking his teeth into your arm.
Fuck fuck, it hurts it hurts, your mind screams just as a shriek leaves your mouth, eyes tearing open to see the blood that’s rushing from where the wendigo’s mouth is latched onto. Black dots your vision at the amount of blood you’re losing, but you try to ignore it as you raise your leg and swing upwards into his crotch. Immediately, he growls and lets go of your arm to tend to his jewels. In an effort to catch the female behind you off guard, you swing your head backwards in hopes of butting her face. However, she expects it, grabbing your head and smashing it into the side of the wall beside you both.
Your senses go numb, ear ringing and losing all control as you knock out immediately upon impact.
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nightbts · 7 years ago
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seeing you again pt.4 | park jimin
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Pairing: Jimin + OC! Kim Yejin
Genre: Fluff/Angst
Word Count: 3k
Summary: It had been almost 3 years since Yejin saw Jimin, but on that one afternoon, fate had something unimaginable in store for her.
Parts 1 2 3 4 (FINAL)
Sequel To: Falling For You (Jimin Series)
---
"She really said all that? Suri unnie?!?!" Jungkook asked incredulously as I nodded my head in response. It was a bright Monday morning that day, the sun shining, the birds singing, the clouds like cotton candy in the sky. But still, I couldn't help by feel just a little blank on the inside.
"Yea..." I sighed before saying, the guilt gnawing at me, "But I feel really bad, you know? It seemed like she really liked him." I said, the words trailing off as my voice went quiet.
Jungkook's eyes softened slightly, as he sighed, giving my shoulder a gentle squeeze, "Hey...don't worry, trust me. I've know Suri unnie for a while now, and she'll probably find a guy in a month or so," He snorted, "I was surprised she actually stuck along this far with Jimin."
Giving him a glare, I remarked, "But still. I just don't like this feeling. I feel like I'm that bad bitch in every rom-com that steals away the guy from the girl who really deserves him. "
"Yejin, you are the girl that really deserves him and even though you can, sometimes, be a bitch-ow-!," he yelped as I hit him, managing to swat my hands away before continuing, "You are not the bad person here, alright? Nobody is. Now can you stop complaining and hurry up and thank me for making that supposedly dumb mistake?" he smirked mischievously, his face quickly gleaming with pride.
Rolling my eyes, I mumbled a quiet, 'thank you' under my breath.
Holding his hands up to his ear, he mocked annoyingly, "Hmm, I don't think I heard that? What did you say?"
"Thank you!" I exclaimed, with a hint of exaggeration in my voice as Jungkook beamed back at me, "Now, was that hard?" he retorted as I groaned, shoving him aside. Laughing, his eyes crinkled into crescents as he smiled widely at me, his hands quickly ruffling my hair.
As we continued to bicker our way into the courtyard, the both of us stopped in when a petite girl suddenly appeared in front of us, her round eyes nervously looking everywhere except at Jungkook.
"Um..Are you Jungkook-sshi?" she squeaked, as Jungkook looked down at her, his own doe-shaped eyes mirroring the girl in front of him. Rubbing the back of his neck, a nervous habit of his I had noticed, he chuckled slightly, "Uh, yup! That would be me. Jeon Jungkook."
Looking between the two with raised eyebrows, I stifled a laugh as I could clearly tell what was going on.
"Um.. you actually left your notebook in class. So I thought I'd return it to you since we had an assignment due tomorrow..." she said shyly, her lips curling upwards into a small smile as she slowly handed it to him with both hands.
"Oh! I never noticed! Thanks Hyerin-ah." Jungkook grinned, as he took the notebook from her.
Her eyes widened in surprise, as she asked in surprise, " Y-you know my name?" Jungkook raised his brow and smirked, "How could I not know the name of such a pretty girl?"
Her face flushed a slight tinge of pink, as a smile crept up her face. She brushed her hair behind her ear before saying bowing and saying goodbye. And as she scurried away, I quickly looked at Jungkook, a look of surprise on my face.
"Am I seeing things or did Jeon Jungkook just flirt with a girl?! Who is she, hu-?!" I giggled as I started to pester him.
Shoving me off, he rolled his eyes before coughing awkwardly, muttering, "I-It's nobody-"
"So you're telling me you just happened to leave your notebook there. It wasn't on purpose, right?" I asked, laughing.
His face reddened as he protested immediately, "I did not!" before walking ahead of you in a cute stomp.
Following closely, I grinned, "Well, she's cute." as we rounded the corner of the hallway, the point at which Jungkook and I parted for our classes.  
Jungkook just sputtered incoherent words and this time I ruffled his hair and cooed softly, "Bye Jungkook-ah," before walking off to my class, leaving an embarrassed, but grinning, Jungkook behind me.
--
It was around 8 o'clock that Friday night and Jungkook and I were at my apartment eating ramyun while watching my personal favorite Korean TV show, Running Man. The beginning of the episode started with its' star guests, my eyes immediately widening at the sight of SHINee's Minho. My eyes were glued, unwilling to look away from the TV when I heard a faint sound from the door.
Ignoring it, I continued to watch the show when I felt a strong gaze on me. Pausing it with the remote, I turned to my right to where Jungkook was sitting, his eyes staring at me, annoyance radiating from his glare.
"What?" I asked annoyed. Rolling his eyes he said, "I know Minho must be like a god to your eyes but how does that affect your ears? Are you deaf? The doorbell rang like twice."
Getting up, I retorted, "And you couldn't get up and get it yourself?" As he shrugged in response, I shot him a glare, making my way to the door.
Slightly curious as to who would be visiting me at such a time, I opened the door slowly, my head peaking out from the side. My eyes rounded at the figure in front of me as I opened the door completely, standing up straight as his eyes laid upon me.
"Jimin-ah..." I trailed off as he gave me a small smile.
"Hey. Can I come in?" he asked, motioning towards the door. "Ahh.. yea of c-course." I sputtered, stepping to the side as he brushed past me, close enough for me to feel his hands brush mine, the touch a fleeting moment but enough to make me flush.
"Ah hyung! It was you?" Jungkook said excitedly as he saw us walk into the living room. They gave each other a quick hug before Jungkook looked between the both of us, his eyes glinting with an all-too-familiar look.
"Well...." he drawled off, "I was just about to leave anyway. I couldn't handle Yejin and her unhealthy obsession over Minho." Jungkook complained, gagging while rolling his eyes.
"Hey!" I whined, as he gave me a wide smile and waved goodbye, walking out the door with a little skip in his step, not before giving me a quick wink in reassurance.
Turning back awkwardly to Jimin, he looked down rubbing the back of his neck shyly before saying," Um, I'm sorry for coming here so late, I-I just wanted to talk about things."
Waving him off, I said gently, "You're fine Jimin-ah, do you wanna go for a walk? We can talk and go to the cafe on the way?"
His eyes shined as he gave me a warm smile, "That would be great."
Chuckling, I replied, "Well I'll just go get my coat and we can leave."
Leaving him in my living room, I rushed quickly to my room grabbing my tan coat. Looking into my mirror to see if I somewhat looked presentable, I smiled and gave myself a quick nod of encouragement.
You got this Kim Yejin, you got this.
As I made my way back to the living room, I found myself looking at Jimin who was looking at the pictures that I had put up months ago on the wall.
Walking up behind him, he turned around sensing my presence, his eyes in slight surprise. Motioning towards the pictures, he asked softly, "You kept these?"
Feeling myself flush in embarrassment, I looked at the floor as I replied," How could I not?"
Up on my wall were four pictures, framed and in a row right next to one another. The first one was my dad, mom and I when we went to Disney World when I was 5 years old. I stood in between my parents, my hands tightly griping onto the both of theirs, a big wide smile on my face as we stood in front of the castle in Magic Kingdom.
The second picture was of Leia and I, a couple months before I left for Seoul. We were holding onto each other tightly, our eyes and smiles beaming at one another.
The third one was one of my all time favorites. Jungkook, Jimin and I were standing on small bridge that went over the small stream we'd always used to visit by my house in the States. Both of the boys were looking at each other in annoyance, their arms crossed and their faces in cute pouts. Meanwhile I stood there laughing at them, clinging onto the both of their backs, my smile wide and bright.
And finally the fourth picture; the one that took a lot of courage and personal strength for me to put up. It was one of the very first couple pictures I had taken with Jimin, one before our feelings were confessed. I was caught off-guard in a mid laugh, while Jimin was smiling brightly at the camera, his fingers in a V. It was a picture that brought back so many memories and stood as a turning point in my life and relationship with Jimin. Just months after that picture, things happened that I would've never thought would and till this day still don't regret happening.
As I looked back at Jimin, my eyes widened lightly to see him staring at me, a unfamiliar look in his eyes that had me feeling suddenly overwhelmed.
"W-We should get going?" I asked nervously, biting my lip. 
Clearing his throat, he broke away his gaze and motioned towards the door," Of course."
--
Walking down the street in silence that chilly night, I hugged my coat closer to me as Jimin and I made our way to the cafe down the block.  As a silence passed over us, Jimin gently broke it and started, "Suri told me what happened."
Feeling myself go still, I coughed nervously causing him to look at me in concern. "Are you okay?" he asked worriedly.
Nodding, I shoved my lightly trembling hands into my pocket as I replied, my voice surprisingly stable, "What did she say?"
Letting out a forceful chuckle, he said, "She tried to laugh it off. She told me what Jungkook had told her and then the conversation she had with you that day after. I was shocked the way she took it, half-expecting her to curse or throw stuff at me, but she didn't. I guess I misunderstood her a lot."
As I listened to him continue to rant on about what else Suri had said, a question had been stuck in my throat ever since he started. Feeling my patience run out, I blurted out, interrupting him, "Jimin, W-Why did you date her?"
Stopping mid-sentence, he looked at me, eyes widened and lips parting, as nothing came out of his mouth. Feeling myself frown slightly at the absence of words coming out of him, I shook it off and muttered, "Nevermind, forget it..."
A cold breeze brushed past me, causing me to frown even more, my body slightly shivering.  Noticing immediately he took off his scarf and wrapped it around my neck, pulling me closer to him. The warmth from his breath fanned my face, as I stared at him while he placed it upon me.
As his eyes trailed back down to me, I pushed him off slightly, still feeling a little frustrated at the lack of answer to my question. He let out a sigh and trailed off, "Yejin-ah.....I-"
Surprisingly tears sprung to my eyes, as I shook my head feverishly. "No, it's okay Jimin-ah. You have your reasons and it's not something you have to tell me I understand-"
"Yejin-ah." He interrupted sternly. His hard set eyes softened immediately at the look on my face before dropping his head low, letting out an exasperated sigh.
"What I did is something I regret till this day. Why I did it I can't give a proper reason for because it just happened." he said painfully, his voice cracking, "I-I all these years, I've never forgotten you Yejin-ah, and I waited, trust me I did, but I felt like recently everything was going wrong for me that I lost my patience. And knowing that I lost it a month before you came back, makes me feel terrible. For you, me and Suri noona."  
Sniffing, he continued, "Suri noona was someone who was actually like a sister to me. She had so many boyfriends and every single one of them broke her heart, and every single time she'd come running to me. And when she confessed, I just couldn't bring myself up to being just one of those other guys. I felt too guilty and accepted her, thinking, I'll like her eventually. But, even then, I couldn't get you out of my head Yejin-ah. Everyday, the guilt ate me alive knowing I was betraying you even after I promised that I'd wait. But eventually I just gave up, and I've never regretted doing that so much in my life."
Letting out a sad chuckle, he shook his head, "I'm absolutely the worst in the world. Here I am standing shamelessly, trying to explain myse- Yejin-ah?" he stuttered as he looked down at me, his eyes going round in surprise.
Wrapping my arms around his waist tightly, I tucked my head into his chest as I felt the tears prick the corner of my eyes.
3 years
I've waited 3 years to be in his arms, to be able to hear his heartbeat in his chest, to be able to engulf myself in his warmth, and even now, the feeling made my heart flutter. Letting out a sigh of relief, he wrapped his arms around my waist, holding me tight against him as he whispered endless apologies into my ear.
Pulling away just slightly, but still in his grasp, I looked up at him as I gave him a sad smile, whispering, "I really really missed you, oppa."
Chuckling softly, he leaned in, his forehead resting against mine. As he stared into my eyes, the memories of us from years back flooded into my mind. The way he helped me get over Will, the way he made me feel worth it and special, the way he made me feel loved like no other.
His eyelashes fluttered against my cheek as he replied lovingly, "I missed you even more."
Nudging his nose against mine, I smiled as my hands wrapped themselves around his neck, pulling him closer, if it was even possible. As I gazed into his chocolate brown eyes, his looking right back into mine, I saw them flicker down to my lips, making me flush.
Leaning in closer, I felt his lips brush mine teasingly as he whispered lowly, "Can I?"
As my breath hitched, I felt myself start to nod when suddenly his lips fell over mine, taking me by surprise. The warmth of his lips against mine that chilly night sent a current running through my body, while I felt my heart hammer in my chest. His hand tightened on my waist, pulling me closer to him and leaving no space between us.
Feeling myself melt against him, I kissed him back, my hands running through his black locks. Smiling into the kiss, his lips continued to move slowly against mine, keeping it sweet and innocent. After what seemed like eternity, we both pulled away, our faces both flush under the street lights where we stood.
Intertwining my fingers through his, I smiled teasingly at him before I said, "Seems like you missed kissing me more than I thought."
Laughing, he gave me another peck before saying, "Not my fault your so irresistible."
Blushing, I hit his shoulder playfully as he winked at me and said cheekily, "Not as irresistible as me though."
Gagging, I said sarcastically, although a faint smile gracing my face, "Gross, you'd think 3 years later and you'd mature, but I guess not."
As he held me close to him, we made our way down the street, as our laughters filled the air that Friday night, knowing one thing and one thing that only mattered.
We were together. --
AN: lmao I had this ready for ages and just never posted bc I kept forgetting also this is unedited and trashy but I was lowkey just done w this fanfic since its been so long but at the same time I hope I did some justice to it hahahah @khadijaahsan05 thx for the endless remainders hahahah :)))))
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jjkfire · 7 years ago
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Wrapped Around; pt.6
Jimin x Reader x Tae // College!AU // 11.8k words 
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Summary: Freshman year was a mess and sophomore year doesn’t seem to be looking too good either. You know boys like them are no good for you but maybe they’re just your kind of type
Genre: Fluff, Angst, Smut
A/N: hur hur finally!!! I always feel horrible for making y’all wait for a month for each chapter haha. also, im running out of appropriate vmin gifs lmaooo
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 2.5 | Part 3 | Part 3.5 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 7
Previously

Jimin silently stuffs a spoonful into his mouth and although he had no appetite, the mere thought of this being something you made is enough to push him to forcefully swallow it. He thinks perhaps if he ate enough of it, it could help fill the vague emptiness he felt in his chest but he knew that only one thing could do that and that was you.
“So, he went to the ball with this Mina girl?” Solji asks, her voice slightly fuzzy over the phone speaker.
You let out a low hum of agreement, sinking down onto your bed, the phone still pressed to your ear.
“Because she asked?”
“Yes,” You sigh, setting your phone next to your head after selecting the loudspeaker option on your screen.
"And you had a week to ask him to the ball but you didn’t?”
“Well, I mean
 yeah
 but whatever, that’s not my point,” You groan. “My point is that he slept with Mina.”
“And is that a surprise to you? You really can’t blame him can you?” She asks. “He probably waited for you to ask him out to the ball and when you didn’t, he assumed you weren’t interested and went for someone else who was.”
“But I am interested,” You grumble, running your hand over your face in frustration.
“Well, how would you expect him to know you’re interested in him if you never show it?” Solji questions. “He’s not a mind reader you know
”
“But we— he knows it, I’m sure he does.”
“Y/N, trust me when I say boys are daft sometimes.”
“Forget it,” You sigh, waving your arms in the air in defeat. “I’m over it, over him.”
“Sure,” She laughs and you can just imagine her rolling her eyes at you.
“I’m serious!” You frown. “This is all probably just a fun game to him. I don’t want a guy who isn’t able to keep it in his pants for like 5 seconds.”
“Won’t you look at this? Kettle calling the pot black,” She scoffs. “Do you need a reminder of the number of boys you burned through freshman year?”
“Shh, we do not speak of the cursed freshman year,” You scold but you find yourself laughing along with Solji by the time you end your sentence.
“Anyway, stop ignoring the poor boy. I’m tired of seeing all of his cryptic emo tweets about you on my timeline.”
“I’m not ignoring him,” You retort. “I’m just busy.”
“Doing what? Lounging around the house in your pyjamas?”
“Hey I’ll have you know that simply doing nothing is a privilege we lose every time the semester begins so, I’ll spend as much time lounging around without judgement, thank you.”
Idiot, Solji mumbles under her breath and you laugh along with her.
With time, the conversation switches focus and you listen about her talk about her winter break so far. As you hear her speak about her calm, drama-free holiday, you can’t help but agree with Solji, that it was you who had created all of this mess for yourself. 
Just because you had shared a few intimate moments with Jimin, didn’t mean that he had to be exclusive with you because the truth was he didn’t owe you anything, not even an explanation which he so graciously offered. Honestly, you were just being a huge baby by ignoring him, refusing to deal with the feelings you had for him, dragging him and others down in your state of confusion. You end the call with Solji feeling much lighter about everything. Maybe you could salvage this winter break after all.
Jimin’s heart skips a beat when he hears you calling out for the boys come movie day on Monday. You throw your arms over the shoulders of both Hoseok and Taehyung before sending a blinding smile Jimin’s way.
“Well, well
 look who finally decided to show up for once,” Taehyung glowers.
“Oh come on,” You groan. “I only missed one week.”
“So you’re not busy anymore?” Taehyung lifts his eyebrows at you, his tone so condescending you almost feel like slapping him across the face.
“Yup,” You answer with a warning glare before your lips curl up into a soft smile. “My aunt didn’t have any errands for me to run today.”
“Ahh, it’s good to have you back,” Hoseok smiles, slinging his arm across your shoulder, completely unaware of the silent conversation you were having with Taehyung.
Jimin stays quiet, watching the whole exchange cautiously. You smile warmly at him, as if the two of you hadn’t argued just a few days ago and he’s completely baffled. So, you suddenly weren’t mad anymore? Had Mina told you the truth about the night of the ball? That had to be it. You were practically seething the night he found you in his home but here you were joking around with all of them like nothing had happened. Jimin wasn’t complaining of course, he missed your playful jests, your adorable scowl.
The three of you prance around the adjoined arcade, playing a few rounds of assorted games. Many of which Jimin lost on purpose just so he could see you rub it in his face, a million-watt smile gracing your lips but there’s something that seems to be missing from your smile that he can’t quite pinpoint. 
Everything seemed rather normal
 well at least normal enough after all that’s happened. Although he notices that you’re keeping a notable distance, choosing instead to cling to Taehyung but hey, baby steps
 at least you were here at all.
After spending a sizable amount on game tokens and snacks, the three of you finally pick a movie to watch, some action-comedy movie and as silly as it seems, Jimin was giddy at the thought of finally being able to sit next to you.
As usual, he takes his place beside you, the other boys sitting next to him on the opposite side. He spends most of the movie glancing at you rather than the screen, looking for a hint of a playful smirk that you would usually send his way but your eyes were practically glued to the screen the whole time. Perhaps the movie was just that good? 
Jimin tries to pay attention to the battle happening on screen but his heart starts palpitating at the thought of finally being able to interlace his fingers with yours again. He felt like a twelve-year-old who had finally scored a date with the prettiest girl in school and he wonders if you knew you had that effect on him, how your presence alone was enough to render him into nothing but a nervous boy.
Halfway through the movie, Jimin spots your hand resting below the arm rest that divided the space between the both of you and a light smile graces his lips. Although you usually did place your hand there earlier towards the beginning the movie, at least it was there now and this was his chance. 
His hand inches towards yours, his pinky brushing yours and suddenly he feels your hand jerk away, retreating towards the popcorn bucket instead. Jimin’s heart drops, the feeling of pain pinching at his chest and if the lights were switched on, you’d be able to see the undeniable sight of worry etched into his features. He glances at you, the bright flashes from the screen illuminates your face for a few brief moments, revealing an unreadable blank expression and he sighs, rubbing his hands down his thighs nervously.
For the rest of the movie, you place your hands on your lap, not wanting a repeat of the attempt and Jimin’s frown only grows deeper. So, he was wrong. You were still mad at him or not... and he’s not sure if this was better or worse because when you were angry at him a few days ago, at least that meant that you were upset with him, that the situation had bothered you. Now that you were smiling at him, as if you were unfazed by it all, did it mean that you no longer cared for him? That maybe you weren't mad at him at all... Maybe you secretly detested him. Jimin just needed to get you alone, corner you into answering him. He knows you hate being put on the spot but your mixed signals were literally driving him insane. 
When the movie ended, Jimin had meant to ask if he could talk to you alone but as the four of you stand in the lobby of the theatre listening to Taehyung rant about the movie, you suddenly bolt the moment you see your bus arrive, frantically waving the boys goodbye as you shout your apologies for your sudden leave. Jimin only lets out a heavy sigh as he watches you disappear into the bus. It was almost as if you could sense the impending serious conversation he had been planning to have. He should have known something wasn’t right. Your smile seemed empty and you hadn’t actually uttered a direct sentence to just him all afternoon. Damn it. His heart aches, painfully so and he hates it. He hates you.
You jump onto the the bus, letting out a long exhale as you plop yourself down onto the nearest empty seat. Pretending Jimin had no effect on you was a lot more tiring than you thought it would’ve been. No matter how many times you’ve told yourself to let it go, that it was fine that he had slept with Mina, half of you was still unbelievably mad at him while the other half of you craved to be held in his arms. Pathetic, you scoffed. Why couldn’t you just make up your mind about him and stick to that decision? 
God, you remember how you panicked when you felt his hand brush up against yours. You weren’t sure if it was deliberate or by accident so you tried to play it off by pretending like you wanted to grab some popcorn. You think you did a pretty good job of trying to hide your emotions but when you saw his constant glances while Taehyung was talking, you knew that Jimin knew something was off. Knowing Jimin, he was going to be straightforward and ask you point blank what exactly was happening between the both of you and truthfully you didn’t have an answer to that so rather than trying to figure it out with him, you took the coward’s way out.
Mina strolls over to your house as you shovel the snow out of the driveway, watching on as you curse each time you plunge the shovel into the layer of white that blanketed the cobblestone path. You notice her a few moments later as she climbs up to sit on the short wall that divided your houses and you finally put down the shovel to greet her with a smile.
The both of you indulge in small talk, about how the last few days went for each other and truly you feel a little guilty because you had been giving her the cold shoulder over something that wasn’t really her fault. She makes no mention of Jimin for the first solid 10 minutes and it surprises you because she usually opened her conversation with the mention of him but then just like clockwork, he comes up in one of her stories. Apparently, he had been avoiding her, refusing to reply to her texts and you shake your head knowing that this was classic Jimin. It was as if he was begging for you to hate him. Unbelievable that he’d give his childhood friend the exact same treatment. An A class asshole, he was.
“He’s a douche,” She grumbles and you nod your head, agreeing to the fact. “But I still like him,” She groans, head in her hands and you frown, stopping yourself short of saying me too.
Breaking two hearts at one time
 you expect nothing less from Park Jimin to be honest. 
She leaps off the wall, dusting the snow off her pants with a deep sigh before turning to you with a large smile on her face. She informs you of a last-minute party she had decided to hold in celebration of her parents both leaving yet again for another work trip, singing gleefully about the set-up she had managed to get done within such a short span of time. It’s obvious that she was throwing the party in a ploy to lure Jimin to her house and boy is she smart because say the word party and he would come running. You didn’t really want to go, especially with how you had left the theatre abruptly yesterday but the promise of alcohol and good music has you nodding your head yes
 even if you weren’t too happy with the guest list.
At a quarter past 9, a few people have already begun to show up but what surprises Mina is Jimin strolling in this early into the night, alone too. He had given a rather vague answer of we’ll see over text so she wasn’t even sure he was going to show up at all but she had mentioned that you were going to be there too in the following text and although there was no reply to that, she should’ve guessed that it was all she needed to say to have him come running.
“Hey, Mina,” He greets, handing her a bottle of liquor. 
“Hey stranger,” She smiles, placing the bottle down on the counter. 
He laughs off the greeting awkwardly, grabbing himself a beer bottle from the fridge.
“I’ve got a question to ask,” Jimin grunts, having trouble with the bottle opener.
“Shoot,” She smirks. Mina has a feeling she knew just what he was going to ask. After all, she knew just why he had been ignoring her.
“Why did you tell Y/N about us sleeping together—” He whispers the last two words, his two hands brought up to mimic quotation marks. “—when I specifically asked you not to?”
“About that,” She laughs. “I didn’t tell her personally as per se. Her cousin asked about my hickey so I told him and she just happened to be listening to our conversation,” She licks her lips, pouring herself a drink. “I kept my promise, I didn’t tell her.”
"Mina,” He groans. “Telling the story while she is in the vicinity isn’t exactly what I’d consider keeping your promise.”
She simply shrugs her shoulders, unbothered, choosing instead to move into the living room where the other guests were gathered.
“Fix this,” Jimin demands with a stern grip on her shoulder.
“How do you suggest I do that?” She questions, whipping around to lift her eyebrows at him. “It’s a little too late for that, don’t you think?”
Jimin stares back in confusion. He doesn’t recognise the girl standing before him at all. Her words seemed to drip with poison and envy, almost malicious, nothing like the sweet girl he grew up with.
“Look, I don’t know what’s gotten into you,” He starts. “But just—”
“Jimin!” Taehyung shouts as he climbs onto the boy’s back, clinging onto him like a koala and Jimin lets out a groan. Tae always had horrible timing. As he struggles to shrug Tae off his back, Hoseok snags the bottle out of Jimin’s grasp, downing most of the drink before he places it back into his hand.
Mina greets everyone, smiling as she sees you striding into her home, your cousin by your side, the sight reminiscent of that of the night of the ball. You pull her into a hug before both you and your cousin make your way to the drinks table, your insides bubbling with excitement as the atmosphere of the party hits you. You fill your red solo cup with a multitude of assorted liquors, a mistake, you know, but you just wanted to reach that alcohol high as soon as possible. 
Jimin watches you carefully, unsure of what mood you were in today. Were you going to be furious with him like you were a few days ago? Or maybe just like yesterday, you were going to be surprisingly warm to him, with a side of mild confusion of course because nothing was ever straightforward with you.
It seems like you choose the latter when you sit down next to him, flashing him a curt smile before joining in on the conversation, shifting a little further up the couch to put some distance between you and him. Jimin silently thanks Taehyung who hands him a drink because lord knows he needed one if he was going to stay sane tonight. Between your confusing behaviour and Mina’s annoying one, he’s surprised he hasn’t screamed out in frustration yet. Why couldn’t Mina just clear things up for him and why couldn’t you just be open with how exactly you were feeling? Women, he sighs. They simply drove him mad.
Taehyung sits next to you, giving you a belated hug before encouraging you to down your drink with him. You meant to refuse the request but he flashes you that puppy dog smile and you find yourself throwing back your cup in one huge gulp. The alcohol stings your throat and you scrunch your face at the burning feeling which earns a laugh from Taehyung. Weak, he teases and you shove him away lightly with a frown on your face.
The drink had just about settled in your stomach when Hoseok comes barging in with shot glasses lined up. You refuse, obviously, but he brings up the topic of tradition and friendship and you groan, reluctantly agreeing to what is basically a one-way ticket to spending the night hugging a toilet bowl.
You’re not sure how Hoseok had managed to line up over 10 shots that quick but here the 4 of you were having 3 small glasses to each person. Your stomach churns when you lift up the first glass and as you chant the classic line before throwing back the drink, you can’t help but think back to how this very moment is usually the last memory you have of every crazy night you’ve ever had. If all goes to plan, throwing back this shot might very well be the last thing you remember tonight as well, which for the first time, might be a good thing.
Two shots in, you try hiding the last one underneath the coffee table but while doing so, Hoseok catches you and he sends you a disapproving look before he makes you drink two extra shots as a penalty. You beg Hoseok, asking him to let you off the hook but he starts pouring a third, warning you that you’d have to take another if you don’t start drinking. Letting out a groan, you twist the glass in your hand making a face as you bring it up to your lips. Taehyung, ever the gentleman starts pouring himself a shot to accompany you on carrying out your penalty. Well, if you were going down, at least you weren’t going down alone.
By the time you’re done, you don’t even dare to stand up because you’re sure your feet will just buckle underneath you. You lay back into the couch, your head nodding along to the music blaring over the speakers while your arms hung off the shoulders of both the boys seated on either side of you.
The next two hours are a blur in your mind. You find yourself enjoying the music and cheering on the boys as they - in your opinion - have one too many drinks and soon enough everyone on the couch is at your level
 except for your cousin. Your cousin is having the time of his life, collecting a year’s worth of photos to blackmail you with, chuckling with each click of the camera. You shout for Hoseok to join the photo session but he’s nowhere to be found, probably in some corner of the house, shoving his tongue down the throat of that cute girl he liked. The boys on either side of you were just as drunk as you though and they comply to every photo request. Usually, you’ve had enough after one or two photos but tonight, you were way too gone to object, the three of you smiling as you all pose for yet another photo, as per your cousin’s instruction. In your state, you don’t notice the way Taehyung’s hand sits extremely low on your hips, neither do you notice the fact that Jimin has kissed you on your cheek close to 5 times now, each time whispering something a little too inappropriate in your ear when he pulls away. 
An ungodly amount of empty glasses lay upon the coffee table top, the sight an indication of how the three of you have managed to hit the sweet spot of being drunk. Each one of you had on the same smile, your heads lightheaded but your minds calm. Sober enough to remember tomorrow when reminded of significant events of the night before but drunk enough to be unable to tell when exactly the three of you had excused yourselves to the toilet to take an obscene amount of selfies on Taehyung’s phone.
“I’m tired,” Taehyung pouts.
“Aw baby, c'mere,” You coo, patting your thigh. Taehyung smiles delightedly before laying down, his head comfortably placed on your lap. He grabs your hand and places it in his hair, encouraging you to play with his soft locks and you do, a light smile gracing your lips as your fingers grazed his scalp in a quiet rhythm.
Jimin frowns at the mention of your pet name for Taehyung. He wanted to be called baby too. In the most innocent and childish way, he hates Taehyung. He hates how he knew all these details about you. He hates how you treat Taehyung with such endearment while he himself only got the cold shoulder or this fake warmth that you’ve recently begin to show him. Jimin wants you to smile at him genuinely or run your fingers through his hair. In other words, he wanted to be Taehyung. Jealousy nips at his insides and he finds himself cursing his best friend in his head. In his slight rage, Jimin reaches for Taehyung’s shoulders, lightly shoving him in an attempt to get him off your lap. He has had one too many shots though so all that’s really happening is his hand lightly gliding off Taehyung’s shoulders, his palm grasping nothing but air. Even so, Taehyung whines swatting away Jimin’s hand that hovered above him. 
“Babe, stop doing that,” You frown, removing your hand from Taehyung’s hair to pull away Jimin’s hand.
Babe. Hmm, he likes the sound of that. 
“Okay, babe,” He smirks, interlacing your fingers with his, an absolutely stupid smile on his face. He returns to his previous position his head resting against your shoulder, a sweet sigh escaping his lips as his thumb glides over yours in a soothingly repeated fashion. With a whine, Taehyung tugs your other hand prompting you to go back to stroking his hair and you oblige. You shut your eyes, tilting your head until your cheek rested against Jimin’s soft hair. 
Your cousin watches all of this, feeling like he was halfway between vomiting at how cringey this all was and laughing because he’s never seen you this affectionate before. He takes at least another dozen photos, knowing that this was a moment you’d love to forget but he will never ever let you live this down. In fact, he would never let you forget this whole night. Might even make a slideshow out of all the pictures as a special birthday surprise for you. You’ll love it for sure.
As it almost approaches midnight, the party has seemed to calm down a fair bit and you feel yourself drifting off to sleep. You shift uncomfortably, trying not to wake either of the boys but you’re unsuccessful. Jimin awakes from his short nap and gives your hand a short squeeze before nuzzling against your neck, letting out a hum of delight.
“I like you when you’re wasted,” Jimin yawns. “You’re a lot nicer.”
“So you hate me when I’m sober?”
“A little,” He hums. “But I hate you a lot when you ignore me,” He pouts, his sentence slightly slurred due to the alcohol that’s coursing through his veins.
“I have never ignored you,” You answer, feigning surprise.
“Tell that to all the messages I’ve sent to you that went unanswered,” He points accusingly in his drunken stupor, a single finger swaying in the air.
“I was busy.”
“Doing what?”
“Stuff.”
“You’re still angry at me,” He groans, noticing the blank expression you often wear when you’re trying to hide your emotions.
“I’m not.”
“You are and you won’t let me explain myself,” He whines, lifting his head to look at you but your eyes don’t meet, your gaze completely fixed on Taehyung’s head.
“I’m not,” You sigh. “I don’t want to hear an explanation because I just really don’t care.”
“So
 you hate me?”
“What? I don’t,” You laugh. That was lie. You did hate him. “I said I just—”
“Then, kiss me.”
“What?” You question, your mouth going slightly dry at the way Jimin was staring at you.
“Kiss me,” He repeats.
“Why?”
“To prove you don’t hate me.”
“I’m not kissing you,” You frown. “I don’t hate you and I don’t know where—”
“If you don’t care and you don’t hate me, kiss me.”
“No.”
“So, you do hate me
 and you do care about what happ—”
There he goes again, sounding like a broken recorder. You put a finger to his lips, interrupting his sentence.
“If I kiss you, will you shut up?” You ask, annoyed with his constant badgering that did nothing to help with the throbbing sensation you felt in your head.
“Definitely,” He answers, his eyes wide with anticipation.
“Great,” You smile, turning your head fully to face him. Your lips are a hair’s breadth away and Jimin could feel his heart start to pound. Was it the alcohol or was it just you? He wasn’t sure. He wills himself to sit up straight, to sober up because shit, you were about to put your damn lips on his and he wants to be able to fully remember this tomorrow.
Except, he never feels them.
“Y/N,” Mina calls, tugging you off the couch roughly and instead of lips touching lips, your forehead bumps against Jimin’s harshly, a groan of pain leaving your throat as you rub the aching spot. Taehyung who has tumbled onto the floor, lets out a yelp of pain before he pulls himself back onto the couch, settling his head down in Jimin’s lap in the absence of yours.
You stumble into Mina when she pulls you forward again and she holds you up, before dragging you away, up the stairs and into her room.
Jimin sits on the couch feeling 1 part confused and 3 parts frustrated because you were so close to kissing him just seconds ago and then you were gone, being whisked away by Mina. What was with everyone and their shitty timing tonight? Your cousin who had been recording everything was on the floor, laughing like a madman and he wonders if a night out with you guys on a regular night during the semester was like this because if it was, he was going to get started on his request to transfer.
Mina guides you to her bed before she shuts the door with a frustrated groan, a look of pure disappointment on her face.
“You shouldn’t have drank so much,” She sighs.
“Blame Hoseok!” You exclaim as you laid down on her bed, your legs dangling off the edge. 
“You were this close to kissing Jimin,” She glowers, her hand in front of your face, her thumb and index finger almost touching. “This close!”
“He asked me to!”
“And if he asked you to eat a pile of shit would you have done that too?”
“No
 but—”
“You know how I feel about him,” She frowns.
You did. God, you’re a horrible human being but Park Jimin is the devil reincarnated and he tempted you at every turn.
“Sorry,” You mumble.
“You ruin everything,” She groans, kicking at the miscellaneous clothing on her floor.
A pang of pain runs through your chest and you stay silent, your anxiety beginning to claw at your throat.
“I didn’t sleep with him,” She exhales out of a sudden and you perk up, confused. “Because I wasn’t ready,” She quickly adds.
“That’s
 that's—” You leave your sentence hanging, unsure what an appropriate response to a sentence like that sounds like so you shut your mouth, swinging your legs in silence.
“And he’s mad at me now because of that whole night and it’s all because of you,” She huffs, fully emphasising her last word.
There’s a second of silence, almost as if she was waiting for you to ask what exactly you had to do with all of this but you know better than to question her because Mina is seething at the moment and she looks absolutely terrifying.
“So, just do me a favour and stop getting in my way,” She grumbles, as if your existence in itself was a burden to her.
“Sorry,” You mumble again. Maybe you should’ve fought her, told her that she was getting in your way too but you were tired and you just wanted all of this damn drama to be over with. You wanted to go back to your first week here, the week where you hid from everyone
 Everything had been much simpler then because no Jimin equaled to no problem.
Honestly, why was Mina here, getting mad at you when Jimin was just at fault, if not, even more so? He was playing the both of you, leaving both of you sad and confused but you know telling her that would get her even more riled up and if what she had said to you earlier was any indication of what she’s like when she’s truly angry, you didn’t really want to provoke her any further. She was simply too blind to see the truth.
With just a few words, it was as if the party had died and everything seemed to have dulled to grey. The elation that came with the alcohol was now replaced with a solemn feeling, one that seemed to swallow you whole. Mina had stormed out of the room after spitting out her final line and you laid on her bed, trying to collect your thoughts. With a loud exhale, you push yourself off the bed, and make your way towards the stairs, ready to go home and grab some much-needed shut eye.
When you find yourself in the living room, you see Mina talking to an obviously disinterested Jimin and you laugh to yourself. The poor girl was so in love with him and it seemed like he barely cared for her. You tap your cousin on the shoulder, pointing towards the door to signal that you were ready to go home and he simply nods, already having in mind just the conversation Mina just had with you.
“Babe, what about my kiss?” Jimin pouts with his head tilted to the side when he notices you saying your goodbyes.
Mina sends you a warning glare and you don’t know why but it makes you bubble with anger. You had planned to stay silent but who was she to threaten you like that? In that moment, you thank Hoseok for all the shots he had fed you throughout the night for you’d never let thoughts like these cross your mind but with a little bit of liquid courage, you feel a surge of confidence course through your body. A pinch of rebellion never killed anyone, right?
You smile sweetly at Mina and the look she gives you sends shivers down your spine but you’re turning towards Jimin, your mouth already moving.
“Sorry, babe. The host says you’re completely off limits,” You frown. “I’ve been told to stop getting in the way of things
 to stop getting in between the both of you sweet, sweet lovers,” You sigh, a condescending smile on your lips.
You know you probably shouldn’t have said that but you were feeling rather spiteful especially after having had the time to fully digest everything Mina had said to you. Shame, you had really liked her before she revealed her true colours. If she thinks you ruin everything, then hell, you were going to make it your mission to.
“What the fuck?” Jimin growls, an immeasurable amount of anger behind his words. He turns to Mina, his eyebrows furrowed, jaw taut and fists clenched. Maybe it’s the alcohol that has him feeling this way because you’ve never seen him this angry before. You tug at your cousin’s sleeve, wanting to be far, far away before you have to witness a shouting match between the two of them and your cousin obliges, quickly ushering you towards the front door.
“Honestly Mina, what’s wrong with you?”
“She’s fucking making shit up, I didn’t say anything like that!” She exclaims, a crowd beginning to gather around them.
“No, I’ve had enough,” He shakes his head. “The last time you told me you didn’t say anything, you said exactly what I told you not to and who are you to—”
You don’t hear the rest of his sentence, your cousin promptly shutting the front door behind the both of you.
“Holy shit, aren’t you guys a dramatic bunch,” Your cousin exhales, guiding you down Mina’s driveway.
“I was just having fun,” You shrug.
“Hell yeah, you were,” He laughs, as he opens the front door to his house. “Just wait until tomorrow when I show you all the wonderful photos I’ve taken of this lovely night.”
You nod, fully aware that he probably has one too many embarrassing photos of you now but really how bad could they be? All you know is that you’re drunk, a little sad and unbelievably tired. All you wanted right now was to curl up into your bed and sleep. The best thing about being this wasted was that you didn’t have time to stop and recount the events of the night because the moment your head hits the pillow, you’re already falling deep into sleep.
You wake up with an absolute killer headache and a heavy sense of regret. Unfortunately, unlike most nights, you remember most of this one. Goddamn it, the one time you wanted to have no memory of the previous night, your brain decides to work against you.
The final sentence you had uttered before leaving Mina’s house still tastes bitter on your tongue but that is one thing you do not regret from the night before. You’ve never met someone who was so manipulative, showing you one side when needed and showing you another when things weren’t going her way. To think you felt bad for her, felt guilty for pushing her away. You shake your head in disappointment. Perhaps your subconscious knew better.
At breakfast, you get a full recap of the night before, completely against your will of course. Your cousin shows you photo after photo, each one more embarrassing than the next but at least you were having fun? The finale is of course the video of you with Taehyung on your lap and your face mere centimetres away from Jimin’s. You cringe while watching it and break out into laughter when you see the look on Jimin’s face as Mina drags you away. 
“Why did you have to go and piss off the only person that throws a decent party in this stinking town?” Your cousin frowns.
“Look, she definitely had bitch flakes for breakfast yesterday because the girl was downright nasty last night,” You huff. “I just couldn’t take it anymore.”
“Guess we’ll just have to raid my mum’s alcohol cabinet to get drunk,” He sighs.
“I’m sorry I ruined the remainder of your winter break,” You laugh, patting him on the head.
“Oh, don’t worry, all I have to do is look at this picture and it makes me feel all better,” Your cousin smiles, turning his phone to show it to you.
There’s a gasp and then a shriek that tears through the house.
“Delete that now!!!”
Your cousin is up on his feet, laughing wildly as he tries to escape from your killer grasp. 
“It’s really one of my favourite pictures of you,” He chuckles, ducking down to dodge the arm that you swing at him. “You look like such a sophisticated lady in it, don’t you think?”
“No!” You scream. “If you ever post that picture, trust that I’ll kill you with my bare hands,” You seethe.
It’s a picture you would later print to keep in a scrapbook hidden far, far away. One to remember your horrid teenage years by. 
It’s really not too bad of a photo. There’s three of you in it; yourself, Taehyung and Jimin, the drunk triplets. You’re sat in the middle of course, with Taehyung and Jimin on either side of you, which sounds normal except they’re both kissing you on the cheek and have one hand each on your breasts while you have two middle fingers raised with a look of fake shock on your face. Thank god movie day is cancelled today because you can’t even think about seeing the both of them before blushing bright red.
You finally get your cousin in a headlock, forcing him to delete the picture in front of you and he pretends to be upset at the loss of a great photo. He’s laughing internally at your proud look of success. You truly underestimated him. Did you take him for an amateur? Of course he had multiple copies of this very photo, all stored away for a day in which it would come in handy.
Ding!
[10:07] Jimin: nerd
[10:07] Jimin: the season finale is out

For a second the world stands still and you release your cousin from your hold. You’ve been waiting for the release of the finale for a whole week now. Wasn’t it supposed to be awkward between the both of you after last night? No, none of that matters not when it comes to the TV series that is basically the foundation on which your friendship with Jimin stands on.
[10:08] You: crap!!!!
[10:08] You: i’m not ready
[10:08] You: wait have you watched it already?
Watched it already? Without you? Never. 
[10:09] Jimin: nah not yet
A sudden realisation dawns on you and you let out a small cry.
[10:09] You: fuck my netflix subscription expired
Holy shit. For once the universe was working in his favour. He had made just the right purchase last month.
[10:09] Jimin: come over then
[10:09] Jimin: you have 10 minutes
You slip into your winter coat, putting on your boots in a hurry. Your cousin gives you a quizzical look and with the mention of the TV show and Jimin’s name, he lets out an exasperated groan. 
“Have fun talking about the whole Mina incident after you finish the episode!” He shouts but you slam the door shut, pretending that you didn’t hear a single word.
[10:10] You: bitch give me 15
[10:10] You: i’m legit running rn
Jimin smiles, getting off his bed to put his plan into work.
[10:10] Jimin: 9 minutes
[10:10] Jimin: tick tock, tick tock
You arrive at Jimin’s house almost 20 minutes after his last text, horribly off schedule, you know but really, you’ve never ran so hard in your life. You hope that he hasn’t started without you and if he did, you would force him to start from the beginning anyway.
Jimin hears you running up the stairs and he quickly pulls the blanket over him, placing his laptop gingerly on his lap.
“You’re late,” He exhales, giving you a disappointed look when he sees you pop your head into his room.
“I’m so sorry,” You apologise, shrugging your coat off to hang it up. “It’s snowing a shit ton outside and—” An awkward shiver runs through you and you rub your hands down the side of your arms. “—fuck it’s cold in here,” You mumble before diving under Jimin’s blanket.
The moment you join Jimin in his bed, he hits play and he watches in delight as your face lights up the moment you hear the words previously on

As the hour-long finale plays, you slowly inch closer towards Jimin, searching for more of his warmth, his thick blanket doing nothing to stop the chilly air that was pinching at your skin.
“Why is it so cold?” You murmur, mostly to yourself but Jimin hears you loud and clear.
“Yeah, the heating’s been a little cranky lately, sorry,” He answers, slipping his arm under you to pull you closer.
A complete and utter lie. 
Jimin had fiddled with the thermostat before you came, putting the heater onto its lowest setting just so you would have to scoot closer to him. It’s a genius plan, he thinks and one that’s obviously working since you were practically laying in his arms at the moment.
You’re so engrossed in the show that you don’t really notice how you were basically cuddling with Jimin currently. Perhaps you don’t realise it simply because it was so normal for you to be in this position with him. Either way, you’re happy because you’re warm and Jimin’s happy because you’re- in his opinion -right where you’re supposed to be. It’s a win-win situation really.
The episode had started off with a thrilling chase, the plot developing slowly as it went on and with 10 minutes left, you don’t think there’s much that can happen but it takes a dark turn, leaving you stunned as you watch characters whom you thought have main roles, start to drop like flies. A knife to the heart, a bullet to the head, each kill hurting more than the one before. You wince away in horror every time and there’s an accompanying squeeze to your side, a telltale sign that Jimin too was literally shitting bricks at the moment. At the end of the show, you’re left speechless as the closing shot shows a room full of dead people, all characters you have come to love.
You turn to Jimin to see a matching stunned expression and he utters three words, 
“Feel good movie?”
You’re nodding your head so fast that he giggles as he goes through a selection of movies. He makes his way down the list of rom-coms and stops at the one he knows to be your favourite. You smile at him, as if to say good job, and he only replies with an annoyed huff. A fake one of course. He secretly loved that movie too.
You barely get through 20 minutes of the movie before you find it hard to keep your eyes open. The activities from last night catching up to you, calling for you to shut your eyes. After 10 minutes of nodding off and waking up, you finally give in, choosing instead to curl up and go to sleep.
Jimin only notices some time after that you’ve fallen asleep. Your signature murmuring notifying him that you’ve drifted off to catch some shut eye. He shuts his laptop and sets it aside, shifting quietly so that he was now facing you. You let out a groan, squirming about in his hold and Jimin holds his breath, hoping that he hadn’t woken you up. You simply settle against his body, draping your arm across his middle while your leg wrapped around him, pulling him closer to you. 
He felt like he was in a dream. You being this close, tugging him towards you? Definitely had to be one especially with everything that has been happening between the both of you, last night being the obvious highlight of the whole disaster of a situation. Jimin had stood there arguing with Mina, the girl he would have given everything to had she asked him 5 years ago. She seemed so different standing in front of him, unrecognisable almost. Perhaps like she said, he had changed or maybe he was finally seeing her for who she truly was now that he was no longer under her spell. Taehyung and Hoseok always did say she was a little scary, that despite her bubbly personality, it seemed as if every move she made was calculated but Jimin had always dismissed that, unable to see anything past that teasing smile she always flashed him
 until now.
Jimin tries to make sense of everything that has happened so far and he wonders how one innocent ‘yes, i’ll go to the ball with you’ had led to all of this mess. It’s all a little too much for him to process and all he truly wants is to enjoy this very moment of you laying in his bed, in his arms, all by your own will. Just the feeling of your warmth is enough to make him smile and he pulls you just an inch closer, tucking your head under his chin before he too shuts his eyes to nod off to sleep.
Jimin stirs from his sleep about an hour later, shivering wildly and he curses himself for turning down the heater so low. He dismisses that thought when he feels your breath against his neck. It was worth it. He’d bear the few hours of cold again if it meant seeing you in his arms.
Jimin lets out a light sigh before he moves downwards, wriggling slowly until he was face to face with you, pulling back ever so slightly to look at your calm features. It’s risky, he knows, but he can’t help himself and before he can think twice, he’s leaning in to place a light kiss on your forehead. He backs away quickly, hoping that you hadn’t felt that. You remain unmoving, your breathing still at the same pace and he lets out a sigh of relief. With a smile, he swoops down to place another kiss at the space between your eyebrows, letting that one linger for just a fraction longer before he moves to the tip of your nose. 
Jimin’s lips had barely left your nose when he notices your beady eyes staring back at him. He backs away slowly, truly hoping that you would somehow shut your eyes and go back to sleep but he knows he’s been caught. Damn.
“What are you doing?”
“Sorry,” Jimin mumbles, his head hanging low.
“I didn’t ask you to apologise,” You laugh. “I asked you what you were doing.”
“Kissing
 kissing your nose,” He answers, his cheek beginning to glow with the slightest shade of pink.
You let out a short hum and Jimin is left slightly confused. He had fully expected you to have been hitting him or running out the door by now but you’re still here, completely relaxed in his hold, wearing a smile of mischief.
“What were you going to do next if I hadn’t woken up?”
“Nothing,” He answers, his voice quivering slightly at the way you seem to be staring darkly at him.
“You sure about that?” You question, a smirk playing at your lips.
Of course he wanted to go for your lips next but he had drawn the line there. That would have been borderline creepy, wouldn’t it?
“I’m sure,” He replies, this time his voice is strong, completely certain of what he was saying.
You shimmy your way closer to him, your nose bumping his and he could feel your breath on his lips as you spoke.
“Really?” You ask. “Pretty sure you were begging to kiss these lips last night.”
He shouldn’t
 not when the both of you haven’t cleared things up yet but your lips were practically brushing against his as you whispered those words and he was just a man. A weak, weak man.
A whimper leaves his lips as he holds on to his last strand of self-control. Your eyes flutter shut and he gives in, surging forward to capture your lips between his own, completely entranced with the taste of you. Warmth blooms in his chest as your hands come up to grip the side of his face, his own hands sliding down to hold you delicately, pressing you as close to him as possible.
You had woken up a few minutes before Jimin, the cold cutting into your bones making it almost impossible for you to stay asleep. You keep your eyes shut, basking in the little warmth that radiated off Jimin, melting at the way he seemed to fit perfectly against you.
The first kiss on your forehead had taken you off guard but you try your best to pretend you were asleep, putting all your energy into making sure your smile didn’t show. The subsequent kisses cause a fluttering that feeling in the pit of your stomach and it was getting harder to maintain a blank, relaxed face. He moves further down your face, towards your lips and when his lips grazes the tip of your nose, you open your eyes to look at him, taking it as your chance to watch a flustered Jimin when he comes to realise that you’re awake.
You egg him on, feeling him tense beside you as you move closer and closer to him, your lips almost on his. The finale aside, you were a woman on a mission. When you had woken up in the morning and recounted the events of last night, you had made a decision. Though Mina’s belated confession made you smile a little, it didn’t change the fact that Jimin had intended to sleep with her that night and that if she was willing, it would’ve happened. You had thought it all out on your trek to Jimin’s house, planning to use his very own moves and words against him. A personal vendetta of yours, to see Jimin get all worked up over the things he said to all the girls he wanted to fuck. 
You were going to get him to play a rom com, hold his hand and kiss him at the crux of the movie. Then, you were going to have him moan and beg underneath you and for the finale, leave him alone and broken in his bed. Although, you have a feeling the last part wouldn’t work. You simply didn’t have enough power over him to make him feel that way. In any case, all of this was for you, for you to finally rid yourself of the player that was Park Jimin.
As much as you liked to believe there was something more going on between you and him, you realised that all of this, all of your feelings for him stemmed from that one night you gave into lust. That’s all it was between you and him, a manifestation of lust and you knew the only way to get rid of it was to get him out of your system. One more time, you tell yourself. It wasn’t going to be hard, you knew that. After all, you were giving Jimin exactly what he wanted. One more time with him and the both of you will go back to being former quiz partners and perhaps even just strangers. Perhaps it was a good thing that you had fallen asleep. It would have been a true shame if you had allowed Jimin to ruin what was your favourite movie of all time.
Jimin pulls away from the kiss momentarily to back himself up against the headboard, his hands tugging you along, your legs now on either side of him and he watches on in awe as you made yourself comfortable in his lap. If cuddling with you felt like a dream then having you straddle him and kiss him senseless felt like heaven. He takes his time with you, moving his lips languidly, wishing to drag this out for as long as you would allow him to.
You break away from the kiss to mark his neck, leaving petals of blue and purple on his soft skin. It’s so hard for Jimin to think clearly when he feels your ass grinding against his cock but his mind clears up just enough for him to remember that there’s still so much he needed to say to you.
“N-nerd,” He stutters, he intends to finish his sentence but you’re biting that spot behind his ear that has him writhing under you. His hands slip under your shirt, roaming your back before gripping your waist with such force, as if he was afraid you were suddenly going to leave.
Your hands tug at the hem of his shirt and he holds your wrists to stop you. Once you get his shirt off and he tears yours away, he knows his mind will no longer have the power to construct full sentences.
“Babe,” He whimpers. “We— fuck—” A roll of your hips causes his words to become mangled moans. “Fuck, okay,” He breathes, barely able to concentrate. “We need to t-talk first before—”
You press your lips against his, cutting off his sentence and he responds with a whine. You were really making this difficult for him.
“We can do that later,” You mumble. “I need you right now,” You whine.
Need. You needed him. Not want but need. He lets that sentence ring in his head one more time before he loses himself completely to your touch, your kiss.
Jimin shoves your hand away, opting to pull his shirt off to speed things up and in that time, you remove yours too. He marvels at your body, his nimble fingers unbuckling your bra in a split second and a guttural moan leaves his lips the moment your breasts come into view. His hands explore every single inch of your body, memorising each curve and dip while your hands tug at his locks, urging him to do something, anything.
All the pictures, all the events, everything that you and Jimin are plays in the back of your mind, warning you of what you are so adamant on destroying but you can’t find it in yourself to stop. Not even the horrifyingly embarrassing pictures from last night can prompt you to stop rolling your hips against him. He was extremely intoxicating, his signature smirk, his scent, all things that had you wanting more
 even if it meant you were digging yourself deeper into a hole of despair. As you sat on him, his aching member pressing against your centre, you come to a realisation that you had horribly miscalculated just how much he affected you and that your grand plan was falling apart with every second. Regret. The emotion fills every crevice of your body but the heat pooling in the pit of your stomach makes it easy to forget it all, to simply stop thinking for a second and bask in the way Jimin was staring at you, his breaths already shallow.
“Baby, fuck, you need to stop that,” He groans. “My mum will be back soon.”
Damn, you loved the way the word baby rolled off his lips. Even if he called numerous girls by the same name, it still made you weak in the knees. You ignore his pleads, continuing your ministrations, watching as Jimin struggles to hold on to his sanity.
“We can be quick, can’t we?” You ask. “I bet I can have you coming in your pants before she gets here.”
Fuck. Jimin’s mind spins at the words that are falling from your lips and all he wants is to hear you say more, speak with more confidence about all the things you wanted to do to him. He can’t bring himself to say anything, his mind only able to prompt him to grab your hand and guide it towards his member that was growing achingly hard.
A light laugh bubbles from your lips as you saddle down further his thighs, your hand tugging down his sweatpants to reveal his member pressed against his boxers, a dark spot forming at where his tip was, pre-cum already leaking through. You palm him slowly through the thin sheet of cloth, the whines that escape his lips causing a pleasurable twist in the pit of your stomach and it takes everything in you to stop yourself from ripping his boxers right off.
“Babe, please,” He begs. “No teasing. I’ve been waiting for this for so long,” He whines.
You silence the rest of his protests with a kiss, letting your tongues dance together, a ton of unsaid words swallowed between the both of you. Your hand slips into his boxers, pumping him once, twice and Jimin detaches his lips from yours, his head rolling back to hit the headboard, rapid breathy whines falling from his lips.
You tug his boxers just enough to let his erection spring free, revealing his cock that made your mouth water, his tip red and angry. You build him closer to his release, your hand spreading his pre-cum down his shaft, gripping with just the right pressure before twisting your wrist to come up to his head, your fingers teasing at his slit. His head now buried in your neck as he tried to muffle his moans with kisses that he left on your supple skin.
Jimin’s almost there, your dirty whispers bringing him closer and closer to his high. Just a few more times and you’d have him blowing his load. His chest rises and falls rapidly, his hips thrusting upwards into your hand to chase his release.
A sharp ring sounds from your back pocket, slowly falling into the melodious tone you recognise as the one you had set as your aunt’s ringtone. Your hand stops dead in its track and Jimin continues thrusting his hip into your hand to urge you to keep going but you let your hand fall limp.
“Don’t,” He whines when he sees you reach for your back pocket. “Don’t answer that. Baby, I’m so close, please,” He begs.
You tilt you head to your side, flashing him a polite smile before pressing your phone to your ear.
“Hi Aunty!” You greet, tucking his member back into his boxers, wiping his pre-release all over the front of his sweatpants. Jimin lets out a frustrated groan, his head resting on the headboard with a thunk! as he gives you a disappointed frown. 
“Y/N, do you think you can stop by the store to pick something up for me?”
Jimin reaches for your hand, pulling it towards his cock, urging you to continue where you had left off but you simply shrug off his hold and send him a warning glare.
“Sure,” You answer. “What do you need me to get?”
Your aunt begins listing a few ingredients, a variety of vegetables but fuck, Jimin has on an evil smirk and you know you’re in trouble. He wraps a single arm around you, pulling you closer, while his other hand comes up to caress your breasts.
You frown at him, and mouth the words stop that to him but he simply shrugs his shoulders at you before his lips wraps around one of your buds, his tongue darting out to swirl around it. You’re delirious as you feel him suck at your skin, his mouth moving to leave patterns down the side of your breast, his hand massaging the other. The words slipping out from your phone’s speaker goes unheard as you tuck your bottom lip between your teeth, devoting all your energy into making sure your moans stay silent. Park Jimin really is the devil, is all your mind can conclude.
Your hand slips between the strands of his hair, tugging at them lightly before you pull harder, forcing Jimin to detach his lips from your nipple. He stares back at you with a sly grin, only to be met with your signature scowl and he leans in to peck your lips, to stop you from saying anything.
You hum into your phone, hoping your aunt hasn’t realised that you’ve been way too silent or worse, that she had heard anything that would have given her a clue of what exactly was happening behind the scenes. 
She’s still listing more ingredients, letting you know on what she was planning to cook and you let out another hum, wishing she would just end the damn call already. Jimin lets his hand slip to your waist as you speak to your aunt and when you give him no attention, he lets them venture further southwards, thumbing the waistband of your pants. He looks up at you but you’re staring into space with your eyebrows furrowed, like you were actually trying to listen to whatever your aunt was saying. As if, he scoffs. His finger slips into your pants, snapping the waistband of your panties against your skin teasingly, knowing full well that this would definitely get your attention.
You pull your phone away, your hand covering the mic as you send him another warning glare. “Jimin, stop that!” You whisper-shout and he only laughs, letting his other hand slip to your behind to leave a hard slap. A tiny gasp leaves your throat and you pray your aunt heard nothing. You move to climb off his lap, unable to tolerate him anymore but his strong hands hold you in place, not letting you move an inch. 
“Okay, I’ll stop,” He whispers into your ear, his light chuckles punctuating his sentence before he nibbles at your lobe. You bring back the phone to your ear just in time to hear your aunt ask if you had got all that and you answer with a curt yes. Crap, you were so screwed.
Jimin shifts under you, pulling you closer to him, your chest touching his and your centre pressed against his erection. It seemed like the word stop had a very different meaning in Jimin’s dictionary. You wriggle around, hoping he’ll release you but your efforts are futile and if anything, only riles him up further. His hips roll into yours letting your core feel his throbbing cock, aching for something, any form of friction. His lips busy themselves by returning the favour, marking your neck as you did his earlier. Low whimpers escape from your throat and your knuckles turn white from gripping your phone so hard, your mind screaming at you to not give into Jimin’s tricks.
There’s too much going on and you feel your resolve slowly crumbling, your mind on the verge of telling you to just toss your phone across the room and succumb to your desires. There’s a murmur on the other side of the phone and you let out a shaky yes, hoping that it had been a question your aunt was asking because you really hadn’t heard anything past ‘I need you to get me some vegetables.’
“Y/N, are you listening?” Your aunt questions, her tone clearly frustrated. “I need you to get them for me now, yeah?”
“Huh?” You question, mind still hazy from the way you felt heat pooling at your centre, the knot in your stomach growing tighter by the second.
“Y/N,” Your aunt grumbles. “Are you in the middle of something?”
“N-no, I’m listening,” You answer and Jimin giggles when you reach out to push him away.
"I said I need you to get me all of that right now.”
“Right now?” You repeat and Jimin backs away to look at you in confusion. Hell no. You’re not going to leave him here with blue balls are you?
“Yes and—”
"Wait, I-I caught most of what you told me,” You lie. “But I think you should still text me the list just so I don’t miss anything out.”
“Ah, my boy will meet you at the store and he has the list, so don’t worry about that.”
What. The. Fuck. She made you sit through all of that torture only to tell you that your cousin had the full list? What the hell was the point of this phone call then?
“He should be there already so meet him as soon as you can,” She chirps. “He always manages to miss something even when he has the list,” She groans.
“Sure, I’m on my way now,” You huff, trying your best to hide your annoyance before bidding her a curt goodbye.
When you hang up and put your phone back in your back pocket, you’re greeted with a look of bewilderment on Jimin’s face.
“No, no,” He growls. “You’re not going anywhere until you fix this,” He grunts, thrusting upwards. A light moan bubbles up your throat, completely betraying your thoughts.
“I-I can’t,” You mumble, trying to hide the moans that threatened to escape your lips. You search his bed for your bra, your hips still attached to his since he refused to let you go. 
“You have to baby,” He groans, running his hand through his hair. “You can’t leave me like this!” He exclaims, pointing to where you were sitting on, finally releasing his hold on you. 
You take the chance to climb off him and he whines, trying to pull you back to him but you slap his grabby hands away with a laugh.
“You said you were going to have me coming in my pants.”
“I failed,” You shrug.
Jimin flails around in his bed, throwing a temper tantrum like a child.
“I’ll eat you out, I’ll do anything,” He begs. “You can’t do this to me,” He whines like a 5-year-old.
“So you mean you weren’t planning to eat me out to begin with?” You question, hand on your hips.
“O-of course I was.”
“You’re stuttering, Park,” You tease. “That’s not very convincing.”
“That’s because your girls are literally staring me in the face right now,” He points towards your chest. “They make it really hard for me to think straight, you know?”
“Shame,” You shrug, while putting your bra on. “If you didn’t stutter maybe I’d be getting undressed,” You sigh as you pull your shirt back on.
“Baby please,” He cries, stalking over towards you. “What am I supposed to do with this if you leave?” He groans, fingers directing you to look at his member.
“You’re a big boy,” You smile. “Figure it out on your own, baby,” You tease, patting him lightly on the cheek. “Or maybe ask Mina
 I’m sure she’d love to help.”
Jimin’s face immediately turns sour and you know you’ve gone a little too far but really, he walked right into that one.
He lets out a loud exhale as he watches you move towards his door, leaving him to deal with the problem in his pants, alone. He’s never been in this situation before. A girl actually leaving him with blue balls
 but you’re a girl he’s shared quite a few firsts with. Most notably, the first time he’s felt himself slowly being driven insane by a girl.
Shit, he really didn’t want you to leave and not because of his semi-hard cock but because he just didn’t like seeing you go. Today was the first time you had smiled at him since the night of the ball. A genuine smile, not that crappy half smile you’ve been giving him lately or the other smile that never quite reach your eyes, one that had fake warmth behind it. This smile was that rare toothy grin that he thinks is reserved just for him. It’s not, but he likes to think that it is. On top of that, you even called him baby, albeit teasingly, it made his heart soar. It was like you wanted him to melt into a puddle right before you. 
You had to stay
 and if you weren’t going to, he had to see you tomorrow. He has a second to decide what to do and before he can really think anything through, he hears his own voice ring around the room.
“Nerd,” He calls and you look back, lifting your eyebrows at him. “D-do you maybe
 want to watch a movie tomorrow?” He asks, his heart beating rapidly in his chest.
“You mean with the boys? Sure, just text the group—" 
"No, I mean
 Just you and me,” He gulps. “Like last time
 you know? and then maybe we can talk about last night, about everything,” He adds quickly. His mind is racing as he awaits your answer, his heart thudding against his ribcage, so much so it felt like it was going to jump right out of his chest. Christ, even his pre-competition jitters had nothing on you.
It’s interesting, watching Jimin shift around nervously and you almost feel pity for him. He’s a convincing actor, you’ll give him that. You mull over the invite for a while, seeing it as your chance to carry out your plan, perhaps a little better this time. Talk. He wants to talk
 that’s new, you hum. The both of you rarely speak about the things that happened between the both of you, choosing to ignore it until it becomes forgotten. You absolutely didn’t want to ‘talk’ but just like today, you think you’ll be able to wriggle your way out of that.
“Sure,” You smile. “Text me the details later yeah?”
“Y-yeah, of course!” He answers, almost shouting out his reply. He had meant to say goodbye but he’s so excited that his mind is unable to string the right words together. By the time he finally gets his act together, you’re already running down the stairs and out of his house.
Jimin takes a lengthy shower, stroking himself to thought of you, pretending it was your lips around his cock but even then, the euphoria he felt didn’t compare to hearing you say yes to the movie date. He paints the tiles with spurts of white, his breath heavy as he comes down from his high and all that clouds his thoughts now was how good you looked sitting on top of him but how much better you looked sitting beside him, your hand in his.
Being infatuated with someone made him feel so lame, he sighs but the warmth that bloomed in his chest with every thought of you made it feel like it didn’t matter.
By the time Jimin is done with his long, long shower, his parents are already sat at the table, lunch completely laid out. His mother complains about how it’s freezing in their house and he nibbles at his lips, a light feeling of guilt swimming in his chest.
Jimin’s parents notice their son being a lot more perkier than usual and they don’t have to ask why when he starts dropping some trivia about you, something or rather someone he had stopped talking about for a while. It’s endearing really and they watch on in fascination as he lights up, eyes crinkling when he smiles. Oh they couldn’t wait until you came over the next time, excited to finally be able to fully embarrass their son in front of you, a few choice stories already lined up.
Midway through the lunch, there’s a faint ding that comes from Jimin’s back pocket but he’s far too preoccupied with the conversation at hand to notice. A string of messages light up the front of his screen, your name flashing above them.
[1:42] You: hey i’m gonna have to take a rain check on that movie tomorrow
[1:42] You: because
[1:42] You: guess who my aunt’s cooking for tonight?
[1:42] You: my parents!!!
[1:42] You: anyway i’m leaving for my hometown tonight
[1:42] You: so i’ll see you when we’re all back on campus :)
Ah, the universe strikes again. It’s mysterious ways forever working against Jimin.
There’s a dull pain that sits at the bottom of your chest when you type out your messages to the boys, your uneasiness intensifying as you typed out Jimin’s. You had definitely made the situation worse with your stunt this afternoon, further confusing yourself but maybe your short trip home would be able to clear things up for you or even better, help you forget all of it ever happened. Maybe like always, after returning to campus, both you and Jimin would pretend like nothing happened
 the both of you were really good at doing that anyway. 
You shake your head, refusing to think about all of it anymore. You’re sure it’ll all work out because by the time the semester starts, you’ll all be back on campus where there would be a 100 other girls that Jimin could distract himself with and you’ll fade to the background, simply becoming another one of ‘those girls’ that he had had his fun with. Just another fuckboy, you tell yourself. Just another mistake. That’s all he was. Looks like you were going to have to look for another cuddle partner when you get back on campus and you had just the right person in mind

A certain Kim Taehyung perhaps?
A/N: a lil insecure about how this chapter turned out bc i know this chap is kinda jumpy with the constant switching of viewpoints but I just idk hahaha I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter!! As always, thank you so much for reading and feedback is welcome!!!
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zaddyzimmermann · 8 years ago
Text
Something Worth While (Pt. 2)
Alright y’all sorry this took forEVER to edit but here it is. I’ve got a basic idea of where I want this to go but I still don’t know how long it’s gonna be lol. I also decided to keep this on tumblr for now because for some reason I’m super self-conscious about it (I feel like I’m exposing myself IDK)
Also, thank you all for your lovely messages they really encourage me to get off my lazy ass and write this stuff
Heads Up: There is a scene that is a bit NSFW
(Pt. 1)
********
Jeremy - 7 years old
He didn’t mean to run away. He really didn’t. Jeremy was excited to get home from school on Friday, running inside to see if his Papa returned home from his roadie. His flight got delayed, his Dad told him. So Jeremy thought he would surprise his Papa by walking to the airport.
So he left the house with only a sweatshirt and walked down the sidewalk of his development with good intentions. Jeremy probably could have asked his Dad to drive him or even just have called his Papa, but this was something he had to do. There seemed like no other option and he wanted to, he really did. Jeremy felt like this was the best route to take, so why not?
It wasn’t until he got to the end of his development he felt a little lost. He didn’t really know which way to go, so Jeremy chose the right because he’s a righty. He’s now walking inside the bikers lane of the gravel road, and the cars that zoom by startle him every once in awhile. When Jeremy gets to an intersection, a car pulls up next to him.
“Jeremy?” It was his Dad’s friend Lily, who would sometimes come over with her daughter because she was friends with Aria.
“Hi Mrs. Cooper.” Jeremy waves in a polite greeting. His parents always taught him proper etiquette when you see someone you know. “How are you today?”
“I’m fine, Jeremy.” She looks confused, and Jeremy didn’t know why. “What are you doing out here?”
“I wanna go surprise my Papa at the airport. Do you know how to get there?”
“Does your Dad know you’re out here, honey?” Mrs. Cooper frowns, and Jeremy is temporarily stumped because she didn’t answer his question, and also because he didn’t know.
“I don’t know.” Jeremy answers honestly.
“Well,” Mrs. Cooper smiles kindly, “Why don’t we get you back home? I’m sure your Dad knows where the airport is.”
“Good idea.” Jeremy smiles, opening the back door to her car and climbing into the back seat.
Mrs. Cooper calls someone on the phone as she drives Jeremy back to his house. He’s excited to go to the airport with his Dad, and he’s thinking he should have invited his Dad to go with him in the first place. That would have made it more fun.
They pull into Jeremy’s driveway, and he sees his Dad halfway across their property before they even park.
Jeremy hops out of the back seat and smiles at his Dad, but it falters slightly when he sees his Dad has tear streaked cheeks and more pooling in his eyes as falls to his knees and wraps Jeremy in a tight hug.
“Jeremy, don’t you ever do that again.” His Dad says firmly as he can, but his voice is shaking.
“Do what?” Jeremy was confused. “Dad, what happened?”
“Don’t run away on me, baby. You scared me. I didn’t know where you went.” His Dad says into Jeremy’s hair.
“Oh. I’m sorry.” Jeremy feels a little guilty now, since he worried his Dad so much. He still didn’t understand the big deal.
“Where were you going?” His Dad asks, clutching him tighter. His Dad must have really missed him. “Why were you on the road? Jer, you could have been hit.”
“I wanted to surprise Papa. At the airport.” Jeremy defends himself.
“Oh Lord.” His Dad sighs before pulling away. He kisses Jeremy’s forehead, then stands up before taking Jeremy’s small hand in his. His Dad’s hand is still shaking. “Thank you so much, Lily. You’re an angel descended from heaven.”
“Of course, Eric. It was no problem.”
Jeremy listens to them say their goodbyes before his Dad takes him back into the house.
“Can we go visit Papa at the airport now?” Jeremy presses, not letting it go.
“What?” His Dad shakes his head, finally understanding. “No, Jeremy. We are going to wait until he gets home.”
“But I don’t wanna.” Jeremy protests, following his Dad into the kitchen. “I wanna go now.”
“Honey,” His Dad sighs, rubbing a hand over his face. “I’m very tired and still a bit shaken from this whole thing. Can we just watch some television together? I’ll even give you some ice cream before dinner.”
Jeremy didn’t want to do that at all, and he opened his mouth to snap just that, but his Dad was already walking into the kitchen and ignoring him.
“Why can’t we go?” Jeremy demands, chasing his Dad into the kitchen. “Aria is at ballet so we would be back in time.”
“Jeremy.” His Dad gives him a stern look, one that angers Jeremy sometimes, because that’s the look his Dad gets when he’s frustrated. “We’re staying home.”
“Why do you hate me!” Jeremy suddenly snaps, and his Dad immediately stiffens.
“Jeremy, I don’t hate you.” His Dad says incredulously, bending down once again to be at eye level with his son. “Why do you want to go so bad? Your Papa has only been gone for two days.”
“We never do things I wanna do!” Jeremy feels frustrated tears pool in his eyes, and it makes his Dad look a little worried; either because he was about to deal with a temper tantrum all alone, or because his son was about to cry and Eric hated it when his son was upset.
Instead of fighting back with his seven year, Eric tries a new approach. “He’ll be home soon. I promise, honey. Will you help me with dinner? You always make it better than I do.”
Jeremy gives his Dad a look that resembles hatred, but not quite, before storming off to his room and slamming the door.
***
Jeremy’s eyes snap open and the room is black, except for the glow of the moonlight. His body has a slight tremor and sweat is coating his skin, and his mind is thinking faster than he can process. At first he doesn’t know where he is, but he turns his head to see the picture of his family on the night stand. Then it’s like a punch to the face, because this isn’t a dream. He goes to Samwell. He almost died in a car accident. When he tries to remember himself in that drunken and manic state, he wonders if he wrapped around that tree on purpose.
The thought haunts him sometimes, when moments are quiet and he’s left alone to reflect. He knows it’s something he should probably bring up to his therapist, but he can never find the courage to.
It’s two in the morning, but he calls his Papa anyway. It rings four times before a groggy voice sounds from the other side. “Jeremy? Are you alright?”
“Sort of. Sorry to wake you up.” Jeremy says, quite timidly. It’s not like he’s scared of his Papa, but sometimes it’s still hard for him to ask for help.
“Don’t worry, bud.” His Papa assures, and Jeremy hears his father shuffle out of bed and close the door as he probably exits his room so he doesn’t wake up his Dad. “What’s up?”
“I, um, I can’t sleep.” Jeremy leans against his headboard and glances out the window.
There’s a moment of silence, like his Papa is hesitating before asking, “Do you think you’re going to have another manic episode?”
Jeremy isn’t offended by the question, even though he would have been a year ago. That’s probably why his Papa is still a bit hesitant to ask these kinds of questions. Jeremy used to be terrible to his parents in an effort to push them away, because it was easier to hide that he wasn’t taking his medication when he was living in Arizona and able to deny skype calls.
“No, Papa.” Jeremy reassures him. “I
” His voice gets caught in his throat, because he knows what he wants to say, just not how to say it. It’s so hard, because he isn’t willing to be honest. His psychiatrist always tells him that’s one of his biggest problems, so Jeremy tries to force the words out of his mouth. “I don’t want to be here. I screwed up. I want to play in the NHL, Papa. I want to be good for something. I want to make you and Dad proud, like Aria.”
“Jeremy,” His Papa sounds stern, but there’s no malice behind it. Jack Zimmermann just desperately wants his son to believe him. “You know I don’t care if you play hockey or not. That’s not what makes me proud. You’ve come so far and improved so much in only a year. Do you know how remarkable that is? That’s what I’m proud of. I know how you feel right now, and I know you’re thinking you lost something that held the key to your happiness. But Individual happiness doesn’t come from people or things.”
"Then why was I happy before? Papa, I’m miserable. I lost so much.” Jeremy is on the verge of tears, either because of his quickly approaching anxiety attack, or the fact it’s two in the morning. Probably both.
“But mon coeur, you weren’t happy before.” His Papa says softly. “Hockey isn’t everything, and I’m sorry you grew up thinking that’s what you needed to do to make me happy. I never wanted that.”
“It’s not your fault. Stop blaming yourself for things you have no control over.” Jeremy sounds a bit angry in his own ears, so he makes a mental note to dial it down a bit. People are still sleeping, and he’s learned to not take his frustration out on other people like he used to.
His Papa doesn’t get offended, though. In fact, there’s a low chuckle on the other side of the line that makes Jeremey feel extremely homesick. “You sound like your Dad.”
“When will it get better?” Jeremy asks instead.
There’s a sigh before his Papa says softly, “It’s different for everyone, Jeremy. You can’t put a date on these things.”
“I know, I know.” Jeremy suddenly doesn’t want to talk about this anymore, so he shifts the conversation in a new direction. “How’s Dad, anyway? I know he’s working on another cook book.”
His Papa can never help boasting about his husband. Even to his children, Papa won’t hesitate to go on a five minute rant on how amazing and talented Jeremy’s Dad is.
Jeremy’s dynamic with his Dad is in no way a cold relationship, but sometimes it’s  harder to call his Dad to ask for advice or comfort. He always used his Papa for that, because his Dad scared him in the sense if Jeremy said anything stupid, Eric Zimmermann wouldn’t love him anymore. He knows it isn’t possible by any means, but it’s a deep rooted fear that started when he was younger, and now it’s just a part of who he is.
Jack Zimmermann was by no means absent in Jeremy’s life either, but hockey season is always hard on families. Especially when Jeremy’s Papa would be on a roadie, and his Dad would have to handle abnormal tantrums and the quickly shifting moods of Jeremy. He was so young that he didn’t understand why he felt so miserable, and even when he was diagnosed with severe anxiety at a young age, it still did nothing for him, so he took it out on his Dad. Eric sometimes became frustrated with his son, but he never lashed out or raised his voice. It was always that underlying tone of genuine hurt when Jeremy would say things like “I hate you” and “I wish you weren’t my Dad” that Jeremy remembers the most.
So as Jeremy got older and more aware, it was harder for him to lean on his Dad for support, because he was afraid to do it. It was always the fear that if he lashed out one more time, that would be it, the final straw, before his Dad stopped loving him.
It wasn’t fair to make such an assumption on his Dad’s behalf, but if he could turn it off on command he would have done that already. Unfortunately, that’s not how the world works.
His Papa finished updating him on his Dad’s life, and Jeremy waits a few seconds, but not because he’s unsure what to say. “Papa, I love you.” and he still doesn’t know why it’s so hard for him to express himself, so he just accepts it.
“I love you too, Jeremy. Get some sleep.”
And eventually, he does.
***
“Our first game is tomorrow.” Keurig glares at the freshman who are doubled over, trying to catch their breath. Keurig made everyone go through intensive suicides at the end of practice. Jeremy hadn’t felt this tired since the training camps, the summer before he played in his first NHL game. “Jay over there,” Keurig points to him, but keeps his eyes on the freshman. “Is the only one with an excuse. He missed solid weeks of training. The rest of you have been doing this you got here, and some of you- you know who you are- don’t seem to care, which pisses me off.”
“It’s the first game, man.” One of the freshman, Kevin, shakes his head and glances at his suffering friends. He’s also the only one who seemed to be fine. “It’s not like we didn’t work hard to get here.”
What Jeremy has learned the past week, is that Keurig doesn’t play around when it comes to hockey. He’s the kind of guy who takes commitments very seriously. It’s why he studies until he’s passed out from exhaustion, or why he pushes people right to the edge during practice. Rusty told him Keurig is, “Is 100% always 110%.”
Still, their team dynamic is much different than it is at the Haus. For example, Rusty and Keurig are always together, and Jeremy doesn’t want to intrude on the intense bromance, so he just hangs out in the kitchen. It’s surprising how much he gets to witness and hear what stories are told in there. Even the freshman who stop by don’t seem to have a problem with anyone. They grab food Seltzer stressed cooked or cookies Weezer stressed baked. Caleb, a tall Asian boy who is most likely Jeremy’s new D-partner, spends almost all his free time at the Haus, so it’s easy for Jeremy to become friendly with him. He mostly just talks about odd conspiracy theories, but Jeremy didn’t really mind. Apparently, Caleb has a YouTube channel dedicated to his theories and likes to take input from other members of the Haus.
“That’s not what I’m trying to say.” Keurig snaps just a little bit, and everyone goes uncomfortably quiet. “I’m just saying a lot of you think since you’ve made it to Samwell you’re set for hockey-career life. That’s not true. So either skate faster or leave, because college hockey is much different than high school.”
Keurig leaves the ice first with Arrow and Weezer, while the rest of the team lurk behind him. Jeremy skates up to Rusty, who’s staring off at his friend with a concerned expression.
“Is he okay?” Jeremy asks.
Rusty scratches the back of his neck and slowly turns his attention to Jeremy. “He gets intense at the start of the season, but it’s never been this bad. I think it’s the LSATS that are stressing him.”
“I mean, a lot of people get stressed out at the beginning of a season.” Jeremy offers. “It’s hard because these kids are new and they aren’t meeting up to his expectations, so he’s probably just frustrated. Right before my first NHL season, I uh,” had severe depression and anxiety “-flaked, I guess, so the coaches were pissed at me because they thought I was slacking. They were mad because they didn’t get what they paid for.”
Rusty gives Jeremy a small smile, which tells him he helped the situation a little. “I feel like no one acknowledges that you were actually in the National Hockey League. You have legit experience.”
“I guess, yeah. I mean, I was only in it for a year and a half.” Jeremy laughs nervously, but Rusty doesn’t seem to notice. This conversation was moving into dangerous territory. “I kind of like that no one pays attention to my NHL career. It makes things
 easier. Like I can start over.”
Rusty’s small smile turns into a large grin before slapping the pads on Jeremy’s shoulders. “Alright, man. Rest up. I’ll see you around.” Rusty says before weaving his way out of the bleachers.
Jeremy skates to the middle of the ice and revels in the fact he’s all alone. The facilities at Samwell are actually very nice, and Jeremy realizes in that moment he could be in worse places than here. Like dead, for example. Maybe this wasn’t so bad after all.
***
Both his parents recommended Annie’s, so Jeremy made it a point to go there today after practice. Rusty took a stressed and angry Keurig to “transcend” so he would be less of a “diva” and assured Jeremy that Keurig usually didn’t act like this. Apparently, his sudden shift in behavior has never happened in SMH history. Well, not this intense anyway.
Jeremy has always liked writing essays, because it’s an outlet for all his nervous energy. Sometimes he’d like to think he would have gotten into journalism if hockey wasn’t such a huge part of his life.
By the time he’s finished with his coffee and has his introduction finished, someone slides into the chair across from him. Jeremy looks up, a bit startled.
The boy looked oddly familiar with his undercut brown hair and olive skin tone. It was cold in New England this time of year, so Jeremy looked at the boy’s jacket for an emblem that could give any indication of who he is.
However, it was just a red sweater with Samwell in large letters across the chest. Pretty standard.
“You’re in my European history class.” The boy states, his face looking determined.
“Yeah
” Jeremy trails off. “Do you need help with something?”
“I’m so glad you asked.” The boy says, resting his head in his hands. “I’m Ethan Bourgeois, the one and only, possibly the coolest freshman at this school and the only latino on the lax team so they look diverse and inclusive.”
Is he making fun of his own team? “That’s quite the introduction.” Jeremy says tightly.
The boy ignores him and says, “I need a huge favor.”
Jeremy waits for Ethan Bour-whatever to ask himself instead of initiating the question.
Ethan clears his throat and adds, “You seem pretty smart since you’re always answering Professor Colin’s obscure questions.”
“Thanks.” Jeremy says flatly, his tone conveying he is not amused. This guy seems like kind of an ass, and Jeremy was in the zone before Ethan disrupted his focus. It’ll take forever to get himself back into that type of headspace.
“I will pay you mad cash to write that research paper for me.” Ethan searches Jeremy’s face for any giveaway on his emotions, but Jeremy remains blank. Internally, his anxiety spikes because he doesn’t know this kid and disappointing people always rubs Jeremy the wrong way. He absolutely hates unfamiliar situations. He doesn’t think anyone has ever asked him to cheat before.
“I don’t think so.” Jeremy eventually responds once he has a handle on himself. “I’m flattered you’d ask me to cheat for you.” He says, his voice dripping with sarcasm. This is usually how he covers his internal crises up; being an asshole.
Ethan deflates, his initial confidence disappearing. “Please? I’m so desperate. Everyone else in the class looks mean and unwilling–”
“So you’re saying I look like the poor sucker that needs cash.” Jeremy closes his laptop with a sigh before neatly placing his things back in his backpack. No way is his focus coming back anytime soon.
“Hold on, that came out wrong. I just meant you looked nice.” Ethan, to Jeremy’s horrified surprised, actually follows him out the door of Annie’s. Stop panicking, dammit.
“I don’t have any other option.” The boy pleads.
“I have an option for you.” Jeremy stops walking to look Ethan in the eye. “How about you take notes and pay attention? Better yet, actually do the work on your own.”
Jeremy turns to go on his merry way, hoping Ethan The Ass will get the hint, but instead he runs ahead to put himself in front of Jeremy’s path. “I physically can’t. Like, I know what I want to say I just can’t put it on to paper. My older brother is so self absorbed that he won’t help. He didn’t even let me into his stupid frat. Straight out denied me. Usually my mom would do it–”
“You’re kidding.” Jeremy laughs at the guy, but it dies out slowly when he sees Ethan’s face. He looked dejected and terrified. “Why the hell do you want my help so much? It’s not that hard of a paper, and it’s the first of many. Maybe you shouldn’t be in this class if you hate writing so much.”
“It’s not that.” Ethan rubs a hand over his face. “Listen, I just need more time to figure things out.”
“It’s due at the end of the month.” A gust of wind chills Jeremy to the point of being uncomfortable. “You have plenty of time.”
Ethan’s shoulders sag with disappointment, and he opens his mouth like he wants to say something else, but ultimately decides against it. He moves out of Jeremy’s way before saying, “Okay, sure, I’ll try I guess. Sorry for harassing you.”
Jeremy raises his eyebrows in response before walking back to the Haus without any further interruption from Ethan. Jeremy has been here for basically a week, and so far he has had three strange interactions. What that could possibly mean? Samwell is fucking odd and looking more like a place he will never get used to.
***
Jeremy always hated when his teammates from the Coyotes would call him Zimms Jr. He loved being a Zimmermann, because people would see him like the prodigy he wasn’t. Since he is a Zimmermann, that somehow made him better than everyone else; in his mind at least. He was a Zimmermann, so he could do no wrong when it came to hockey. So why, in the past, did Jeremy hate being called Zimms Jr.?
The Zimmermann name was a crutch he relied on heavily, and it was a crutch Jeremy didn’t realize he hated.
Yes, he loved being a Zimmermann, but not for the hockey. It isn’t until now, as he’s being slammed into the boards and getting the wind knocked out of him, that he realizes that.
Jeremy falls to his knees and the Princeton fans’ cheers fill the arena. No whistle is blown, because he’s not injured and it was a legal check. In fact, he’s endured worse in the NHL. So he pulls himself up and makes the line change. He’s surprised he even got to play tonight, even if it was just for a couple minutes.
“Nice job!” Keurig smiles, shaking his shoulder. “Not bad for someone who’s only had a week of practice.”
No one here cares about his past career. There were some chirps thrown at him out on the ice by the opposing team regarding his former position on the Arizona Coyotes, but they weren’t offensive or insensitive. They were no different than what his other teammates were receiving. It was all in good fun, and Jeremy finds himself regretting the fact he missed this part of the game.
Jeremy went into his first game prepared for the worst, because it’s been nearly a year since he’s last played a hockey game, but in reality it felt shockingly normal. Jeremy wasn’t bitter he was playing college hockey, like he expected himself to be. Actually, it felt
 nice. Somehow, his five minutes on the ice felt more fulfilling than the twenty-five he would be playing in the NHL. Why? Because he didn’t have a crutch, this was all him. He managed to separate himself from the Zimmermann legacy, so maybe his teammates will separate Jeremy from his mental illness if he eventually tells him. It’s nice to know he could possibly have a team to lean on in the future.
Keurig ends up scoring the winning goal and the entire team is ecstatic. Their celly made Jeremy so genuinely happy it was almost emotional overload. They won their first game of the season against Princeton, and for once since getting here, Jeremy didn’t ignore the warm feeling in his stomach, because he could admit he was happy in this moment.
***
It was Jeremy’s first Epikegster, so he didn’t want to miss it. However, he was also fully aware of the alcohol flooding the room. He’s never supposed to drink again– him being an alcoholic and all– so it’s awkward when all the other rookies are doing their first kegstand while everyone else cheers in delight. No one offers it to him, but the fact that they still could sparks his anxiety. So he fills his red plastic cup with coke and retreats to the kitchen to hide.
The public knows he’s an alcoholic, but that’s it. The public doesn’t know he has bipolar disorder, but not because he’s ashamed. Simply because it’s none of their damn business. Also, because he knows the headline would be “Jeremy Zimmermann is Bipolar” instead of “Jeremy Zimmermann has Bipolar disorder.” It’s a difference not a lot of people understand matter to Jeremy. He’s still a person, not a walking talking mental illness.
He snaps a quick picture of the living room packed with people, and sends it to his Uncle Shitty. The boys still think he’s joking around when he mentions he has an uncle named Shitty, but Jeremy thinks that’s even more funny. It’s like he has an inside joke with himself.
“Hey! It’s the hottie from the coffee shop.”
Jeremy whips around, since the voice came from behind him. That moment in itself gave him a sense of deja vu.
Ethan was grinning as he made his way over to Jeremy. “You didn’t seem like much of a party person when I last spoke to you.”
“Yeah, I forgot my red solo cup at home. Usually I bring that thing everywhere with me.” Jeremy chirps Ethan, making sure he doesn’t sound annoyed. He’s in too good of a mood to be mad at the guy anymore. He probably had things going on Jeremy didn’t know about.
Ethan laughs and hops up on the counter across from him. He still looks painfully familiar.
“Did we meet somewhere before the coffee shop?” Jeremy couldn’t help but ask.
Ethan raises an eyebrow, and his smile curls up into a flirtatious smirk. Interesting. “Are you flirting with me–” He pauses, a frown taking over his chiseled face. “Fuck, I didn’t even ask for your name. I’m such a dick; that’s so a thing my brother would do.”
Jeremy couldn’t help but laugh, because yeah, on top of asking a stranger to write your paper, not asking for that stranger’s name is also a douche move.
“I’m Jeremy.” Is the only thing he offers, just in case Zimmermann might give anything away. If this guy didn’t know who he was in the first place, then it is more likely than not he has no idea who Jack Zimmermann is.
“Good to know.” Ethan leans back on his hands, making the muscles on his forearms look especially nice.
Jeremy isn’t an idiot, he knows what’s going on here, because this isn’t the first time it’s happened. Jeremy has been with both guys and girls, because he frankly doesn’t care about gender when it comes to sex or romantic relationships. It’s not like he’s in the closet, either. Once, he brought his boyfriend from high school to a family reunion in Georgia. That wasn’t the most wise decision, because one of his relatives made an offhand comment of, “It must run in the family” that made Jeremy so angry he hid in a bathroom and cried for an hour.
When he got to the NHL, he just didn’t have the energy to be in a relationship other than quickies in a bar bathroom. Ever since his Papa and Kent Parson came out and opened that door, the presser didn’t treat being a part of the LGBT+ community as such a “scandal” anymore. The league is still a long ways away from being entirely inclusive, but it sure isn’t as bad as it used to be. From what his parents told him, anyway.
And the truth is, Jeremy hasn’t been with anyone since the car accident. So he thinks it’s perfectly normal for him to be just slightly turned on by the man in front of him. Well, more than slightly.
After searching Jeremy’s face for any indication he would reject Ethan, he seems to get what he’s looking for, because he hops off the counter and crowds himself into Jeremy’s personal space.
“You’ve ever been with a guy before?” Ethan asks, sliding a hand up Jeremy’s bicep.
“Yup.” Is all he offers.
“Cool. I haven’t.” Ethan says nonchalantly like he’s talking about the weather before pressing his lips to Jeremy’s.
It’s extremely hesitant at first, which gives away that Ethan is a little nervous. Jeremy doesn’t rush or force anything, but when he slides his tongue along Ethan’s bottom lip as if asking for permission, Ethan pulls away.
Jeremy thinks something might be wrong, but Ethan just says “-really fucking pissed it took me this long to realize I’m gay. I blame my bigoted family.”
“Um–” Jeremy frowns but he’s instantly shut down.
“Shut up.” Ethan mutters before leaning in for another kiss. They are about the same height, so it’s easy for them to adjust themselves. Ethan surprisingly slips his tongue into Jeremy’s mouth first, and it’s such a hungry kiss Jeremy isn’t surprised he himself is intensely turned on already. When he positions his leg in between Ethan’s thighs, he feels that Ethan is pretty much on the same boat.
Ethan grinds down to get the friction his body needs, and the low moan of pleasure makes Jeremy even more turned on.
Jeremy misses the feeling of being this close to another person. He misses when someone would hold on to him for dear life, when he made someone moan or beg for more, or when someone raked their fingernails down his bare back. It made Jeremy feel useful in the best way possible. He was able to give something to someone else, and he was able to get something just as great in return.
Jeremy really didn’t want to be caught busting his load in the fucking kitchen, so he retreats from the making out to ask Ethan if he wants to go upstairs.
“Fuck yeah.” Ethan replies with enthusiasm, so the two boys race each other up the stairs. Ethan is a little playful with it, too. He grabs Jeremy’s shirt and jerks him back to get the upperhand, but suddenly stops when he realizes he has no idea where he’s going.
Once they get into his room, Jeremy locks the door behind him and turns around to see Ethan studying Jeremy’s room. “Wait– this is your room? You live here?”
Jeremy blinks, still in his lustful haze. “I mean, yeah
 I thought that was implied.”
“You’re a hockey player.” Ethan states, looking like he’s battling something internally. “Your last name is Zimmermann, isn’t it? Didn’t you attack the lacrosse team with a fire extinguisher?”
Jeremy didn’t see how any of this is relevant, but he also didn’t want to force Ethan to do anything he didn’t want to do just in case Ethan is stalling right now. Didn’t Ethan mention he was a lacrosse player?
“Yeah. They stole my Dad’s recipes and planned on burning them.” Jeremy defends himself, because he senses Ethan’s judgemental tone. He leans against his door, crossing his arms to portray a stance of “what are you gonna do about it?”
“Hmm.” Ethan just looks thoughtful now, absently glancing at the picture of Jeremy and his family on the nightstand. “Your Dad was the first out player in the NHL, right?”
“My Papa, yeah.” Jeremy’s voice sounds extremely strained, mostly because he’s waiting for Ethan to say something offensive.
“I didn’t mean it like that.” Ethan frowns, instantly recognizing Jeremy’s protective tone. “That’s pretty fucking cool. My Step Dad is a dick, so.” He clears his throat, glancing everywhere around the room but Jeremy. “Do you know who my brother is?”
“No?”
Ethan glances back at Jeremy and raises an eyebrow. “My brother is Todd– well technically he’s my half brother. Pretty funny story actually. My dear mother cheated on my Step Dad with their marriage councilor. Ha!”
Jeremy didn’t exactly find that to be a funny story, so he doesn’t even force himself to laugh.
Ethan continues like he didn’t say anything important. “My brother literally has a bounty on your head.”
Now Jeremy knows why Ethan looked so familiar to him. He has the same jawline and the same eyes as Todd, possibly just an inch shorter in height.
“A bounty?” Jeremy chuckles, extremely amused on how ridiculous this whole feud is. “Did you come here to kill me?”
When Ethan laughs this time, it’s a different sound. Jeremy realizes that it’s more of a genuine laugh, rather than the fake one he used a few moments prior. “Did I completely ruin the mood?” Ethan gives him an amused smile. “To be honest, I really don’t fucking care you’re a hockey player. Actually, it’s kind of hot. We’re like Romeo and Juliet.”
“They die in the end.” Jeremy can’t help but mention.
Ethan snorts and rolls his eyes. “In the name of love, Jeremy. There is a difference.”
“Won’t you be blacklisted for making out with me?” Jeremy sarcastically gives him a deadpan expression.
“Won’t you be blacklisted for making out with me?” Ethan challenges. “The hockey team hates the lacrosse team just the same.”
Ethan jumps up to his feet to close the space between them, but stops short so they are not quite touching. He grabs the hemline of his shirt before pulling it over his head, revealing a very sexy torso. Yes please. “I won’t tell if you won’t.” Ethan sings, and Jeremy leans forward to place his lips on Ethan’s neck. His hand snakes around to his bare lower back, pulling him in closer. He begins sucking on the underside of Ethan’s jaw.
“Fuck.” Ethan breathes out softly, his chest rising and falling quickly as he pants.
They stumble to Jeremy’s bed, and Jeremy pulls off his t-shirt in the process. Ethan’s gaze eats him up hungrily before Jeremy is hovering over him, then moves to trailing kisses down Ethanïżœïżœs stomach.
“Not to ruin the mood, but
” Jeremy trails off, giving Ethan a pointed look. It shouldn’t ruin the mood, because he was just being safe–
Ethan isn’t fazed when he responds, “I have a condom in my back pocket like a horny college student, thank you very much. Feel free to do a little extra searching while you’re at it.” A slow grin spreads across Ethan’s face and he winks, the earlier cockiness of personality coming back.
It’s been awhile since Jeremy has given a blowjob, or has had any sexual encounters, but Ethan doesn’t seem to have any complaints. Jeremy sucks him off and Ethan jerks Jeremy off, so overall it was pretty pleasant. 
Jeremy expected Ethan to escape as soon as this was finished since his brother was the captain of the lacrosse team, but he just lies beside Jeremy, staring up at the ceiling. Jeremy doesn’t mind the company, he’s missed the feeling of sleeping next to a warm body.
“So like, high key, best blowjob I’ve ever received.” Ethan says after a few minutes of comfortable silence.
“Thanks.” Jeremy laughs a little, but he doesn’t turn to look at him.
“I have a confession. I was harcore thirsting after you in our history class. You’re fucking distracting with your stupid Henlys jesus christ.”
Jeremy tilts his head towards Ethan and raises an eyebrow when Ethan gives him a smirk. Jeremy asks, “Is that why you wanted me to write your paper so bad?”
Jeremy must have said the wrong thing, because Ethan’s smirk disappears and his cheeks redden with embarrassment as he glances away. “No. I thought it would be a plus since you were hot, but I didn’t ask you because I wanted to get in your pants.”
Ethan doesn’t elaborate, but Jeremy still waits for it. He wants to know why Ethan was so against writing a simple research paper on his own. All they had to do was watch two movies relating to something monumental in European history, and write a paper on how accurate it was and how inaccurate. It was actually kind of fun, in Jeremy’s opinion. “Why?” Jeremy decides to make it simple, instead of saying all of those thoughts to Ethan.
“I’m dyslexic.” Ethan still doesn’t look at him, because his cheeks are still red with embarrassment. “My parents never really got me help, they kind of just did stuff for me. I mean I’m pretty loaded, I’m not gonna lie, so they probably just assume I’ll live off my trust fund or whatever. My brother is the real deal, you know?” Ethan sighs, finally turning to face Jeremy. “My dad the marriage counselor wanted nothing to do with me. I mean, makes sense. Imagine how much business he would lose if that got out.”
Ethan seems to be doing that thing again where he turns something that makes him uncomfortable into a joke. Jeremy is no psychoanalyst, but he recognizes it as something he used to do.
“They tried to pass me off as their kid but, uh-” Ethan laughs, but it comes out a little too sharp. “-people start questioning things when your half latino and your “dad” is some big shot white guy. So I’m just kind of there. I’m meant to be seen not heard.” Ethan pauses before adding, “You’re welcome. You’ve heard my sob story.”
Jeremy frowns and decided to address the earlier issue in that whole story. “Being dyslexic is nothing to be ashamed of.”
“Yeah, whatever. You sound like my brother.” Ethan mutters before rolling over onto his side, studying Jeremy with a calculated expression. “I don’t really follow hockey, like at all, so what’s your deal? I know who your Dads are, because who doesn’t? But aren’t you a descendant of hockey God Bad Bob Zimmermann?”
Jeremy sighs, but he finds it easier talking to someone he barely knows than he does talking with his psychiatrist. That’s probably the same reason why Ethan told him his whole backstory. Sometimes it was nice to talk about yourself to someone who didn’t hold any bias.
“I got really fucking wasted and crashed my fancy sports car.” His tone is dripping with bitterness, so much so Ethan actually takes a few moments to respond.
“Are you
 Okay?” Ethan offers, and Jeremy can tell he’s trying really hard to find the right words.
“Nope.” Jeremy says without hesitation. “And I never will be. Subject change, please.”
“Actually, I’m about ready to pass out.” Ethan goes to sit up, but Jeremy stops him against his better judgement.
“You can stay if you want, but if you don’t want people to know, you should leave in a few hours.”
“So romantic.” Ethan huffs out with a small laugh. “Who knew you were such a sweet talker?” But he slides back under the covers anyway, and rolls over towards Jeremy to invade his personal space again. “I’m a cuddler, Zimmermann.”
“Goodie.” Jeremy’s eyes slip closed and he falls asleep soundlessly.
When he wakes up in the morning, his bed is empty and his room smells faintly of axe body spray. Fucking lacrosse players, Jeremy thinks to himself with a fond smile on his face.
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Okay y’all I really hope that was worth the wait and I exceeded your expectations
There will be more about the actual team next time bc it’s parents weekend (get rekt) but I gotta set things up with good ol’ Ethan
This will also be under the tag of #jeremyzimmermann so it’s easier to find the updates 
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