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nerdywriter36 · 5 days ago

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Fanfiction Author Interview Game

Thank you @brendadaaedestler for the tag!

How many works do you have on AO3?

30 as it stands!

What's your total AO3 word count?

591,986

Your top 5 stories by kudos:

Sticky Notes and Serendipity // collab with @brendadaaedestler // Erik/Christine long-fic // 224 kudos

Say You'll Share With Me // oneshot collection, mostly Erik/Christine // 143 kudos

Our Little Home // oneshot // Erik/Christine // 139 kudos

Starting Fresh // twoshot // Erik/Christine // 99 kudos

my heart is home when my hand is in yours // oneshot collection, collab with @brendadaaedestler // mostly Erik/Christine // 83 kudos

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I always do! I love seeing readers interacting with my fics and sharing what they enjoyed about them, and I always want to show my appreciation for those comments. The only reason I wouldn't is if I missed it somehow or if my frequent co-author has beaten me to the punch and replied already.

What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?

It's probably Sleep So Long Awaited, which is a play on the end of LND where Erik dies instead of Christine. It's sad, it's got sad Gustave, a moment of peace between Erik and Raoul, and...well, Erik dies. It's not a happy story.

What's the fic you've written with the happiest ending?

I would definitely say Sticky Notes and Serendipity! The epilogue hasn't gone up yet, but it's super fluffy and sweet, and the entire fic just came to such a happy, wonderful ending. You'll see what I mean on Saturday 😉

Do you write crossovers?

I don't, no. I might write fics inspired by another piece of media, but I wouldn't think I would ever write a proper crossover.

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Not direct hate? I once received some criticism that was DM'd to me that was definitely not asked for and unnecessary, so that sucked. It was really a big blow to me, and I considered taking down that fic after receiving that comment because it made me super insecure about the entire format of the fic. It came from a person who had been very supportive of my stories for a long time, which made it even worse. Thankfully, my best friend convinced me not to take the fic down, and my critic has now been exposed for not being a good person, so it all worked out in the end.

Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I don't write it and I won't be writing it.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Yep, I have had my fics scraped and posted on other websites at least twice, either by bots or by another user.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

I have not! Someone offered to translate Like Father, Like Son, but my coauthor on that story was not keen on the idea. It's something I would have to consider because I think I would worry too much about my style and plans for the story being lost in translation and I wouldn't be able to really tell. I wouldn't totally write it off, though!

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Ohhhh yes! Like Father, Like Son was my first collaboration, and I write probably about half of my fics these days with my best friend @brendadaaedestler. We have something in the works for NaNoWriMo as we speak!

What's your all-time favourite ship?

Definitely Erik/Christine, I love writing with them and reading about them so very much.

What's a WIP that you want to finish but don't think you ever will?

It's not one that I don't think I will ever finish, but I think it will be a while before No Need For Goodbyes ever gets finished. I would love to go back to it, but I've been away from that cast of characters for so long that it can be hard to slip back in. My coauthor also no longer has the time to work on it with me, and it is a very time-consuming project, so I'm not sure when I will get back to it.

What are your writing strengths?

I think that dialogue is definitely my strength. It comes very easily to me and it's something that I always enjoy getting to write.

What are your writing weaknesses?

Getting lost in the dialogue! Sometimes I get so caught up in what the characters are saying and the emotions that they're expressing that the writing can get dialogue-heavy. I always have to make a conscious effort to include scene descriptions, settings, and descriptions of the character's bodies and expressions.

What's a fandom/ship you haven't written for yet but want to?

This is an interesting question that I honestly don't think about a ton lol? I've always been pretty content writing Phantom fic and don't really have the inspiration to jump into other fandoms. Shipwise, I've only written sporadic Meg/Erik fic and only a long time ago, so that one could be fun to explore. There is angst there.

What's your favourite fic that you've written?

It was Like Father, Like Son for the longest time because it was my first Phantom of the Opera fic, my first long fic, I loved the characters, etc. I'm still super proud of that story, but I think Sticky Notes and Serendipity takes the cake. It's my first true multi-chapter fic since LFLS, and I can just see how much my style has changed, how much my writing has improved, and it makes me feel really good about myself. I am in love with the versions of the characters that we wrote, and getting to work so much with Erik's anxiety and making it feel so authentic was a crowning achievement for me. Also, seeing all of the love for the story that Chloe and I have written together makes me feel so amazing. Sticky Notes is my favourite for so many reasons.

Tagging: @starlitexpress @intothemertensverse @sloanedestler @ablatheringblatherskite @shinyfire-0 @paperandsong @jennyfair7 and anyone else who wants to play!

#tag game #writing stuff #my writing #fic #poto #long post

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the-guilty-writer · 2 years ago

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Criminal Minds PRIDE Fic Challenge!

Here we go! First writing challenge ever and I'm even more excited about the theme. During June I ask fic writers to challenge themselves a little bit by writing a piece that is LGBTQ+ inclusive!!! Don't let the topic intimidate you; If you want to participate, but don't know where to start, there are prompts to help. All the fics will be collected in a Masterlist that will be avalible by July 1st.

Note: if you have accessibility issues with this post (or any of my posts!) let me know and I can send you the information in an accessible format.

Prompts and rules are under the cut!

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These prompts are only ideas to help get you started! You can write any LGBTQ+ centered fic you want! Feel free to modify any of the more specific prompts to your liking.

Prompts:

Character coming out to their friends/family/the team.

Character's found family is more supportive than biological family when they come out.

Characters go to a pride parade/festival/event!

Characters discuss queer coding in media.

Character(s) explains their new, queer relationship to a child.

Character 1's child comes out to them. They go to Character 2 to ask what they wish their parents would have done.

Character 1 is having an identity crisis (gender or sexuality). They go to Character 2 for help.

Character 1 is confident about their identity. Character 2 isn't, so they ask for some advice.

Character 1 takes Character 2 to a gay bar for the first time to act as their wingman/wingwoman/wingperson.

Character 1 is unsure if they're attracted to or envious of Character 2's confidence in their identity.

Character has been dating Morgan, but realizes they're not attracted to men. He isn't sure how he ended up in this situation twice, but it's the perfect opportunity for him to play matchmaker for his ex girlfriends.

Character comes out to the team (or it's just pride month) and Penelope goes a bit overboard with decorations.

For the writers who are intimidated by this topic or unsure if they can write it: write something with GN!reader. It's less intimidating than you think, and it can make someone's day to be able to read a fic they might otherwise not relate to!

Bi and Pan Prompts:

Character 1 has always thought they were straight, but they realize their feelings for their best friend, Character 2, are more than platonic.

Character 1 is in a straight passing relationship and worries about the visibility of their queer identity. Their partner is incredibly supportive in helping them express themselves.

(NSFW) What does Emily really do during a sin to win weekend?

Trans and Nonbinary Prompts:

Character 1 gives Character 2 a gender affirming haircut.

Hotch teaches Character how to shave.

JJ teaches Character how to do make up.

Character finds themselves needing gender affirming clothes. Rossi makes sure they have the best of the best.

(NSFW) Character 1 gifts Character 2 gender affirming lingerie and it gives them quite the confidence boost.

Aro and Ace Prompts:

Character 1 keeps trying to set up Character 2 with people/telling them to find someone to help ease their stress. Character 2 has had enough of it.

Character has a monthly spike in libido and it makes them question their identity. Spencer tries to help with a ramble about science (NSFW add on: and a few other ways).

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Rules:

The fic can reader insert, OC, character x character, general fic, etc. as long as the character(s) is from Criminal Minds (yes, even the ones I don't write for).

Fics can be any genre and can be platonic or romantic in nature... and yes, this includes smut (I know, I know my brand is ruined. Oh well). You must be 18+ if you are going to submit smut. You all know I love platonic fics very much if not more!

You can write something new or dig up something you've already written! I'm also happy to add on fics that are sent to me after the masterlist is posted.

Tag me in your fic or message me the link. Please list the ship, content warnings, and have a 1-2 sentence summary of your piece! If you have multiple pieces, you can submit a mini masterlist.

Be kind and respectful! Reach out to me if you have any concerns. This blog is a safe space!

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Thank you to @imagining-in-the-margins for the support and for sending some of the prompts from discord! (and telling me it's safe to tag @foxy-eva for this too)

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maochira · 2 years ago

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Lies and guilt.

Tags/notes: gn!Ego's kid!reader, reader is a teenager, a little angsty, hurt/comfort but it ends with hurt, canonically Ego is too young to have a teenage kid so he's a bit older in this

Synopsis: You live in the Blue Lock facility along with Ego and Anri, but it gets boring sometimes. That's why you started sneaking out to where the Blue Lock players are. But one evening, you get injured and there's no other choice than to tell your father the truth.

Requests open! - dad!Ego masterlist - regular masterlist

You've always been a good child who never got into trouble, so lying to your father and hiding something from him is extremely out of place in your behaviour. When you first started sneaking into the players' area, you promised yourself it would be a one-time thing. A one-time thing you'd immediately forget about afterwards.

But then it happened again. And again. And now it's a regular thing. At least twice a week you find yourself on one of the training fields with some of the Blue Lock players.

There might be cameras in most places, but you know where there are none and when your father isn't watching. Usually, it's late at night or very early in the morning.

You're not proud of it and there's always a bit of guilt inside you when Ego praises you for being such a good child, but there's no way you could tell him the truth. You've done it way too many times to save yourself from his disappointment and anger. And yet, you keep repeating it. Really, what has gotten into you?

Maybe it's the loneliness of living in the Blue Lock facility. Shortly before Blue Lock began, you were kicked out of your soccer team because your coach wasn't okay with you following your father's egotistical approach to soccer.

Seeing all these players with the same approach and knowing how close they're to you, made you want to meet them. And you gave in to that urge, over and over.

You didn't know for how long you'd be able to keep hiding this from Ego before you break down and admit you haven't been the good kid he still sees you as.

Today's evening went like any other. You went to meet some of the Blue Lock players you've become friends with and played a bit with them. You would have definitely stayed longer, but the ball hit your face and your nose started bleeding. In a regular match or practice, that wouldn't have bothered you. But something in the moment when the ball hit your face, something clicked in your brain.

Sure, accidents happen during soccer. You've certainly had your fair share of minor injuries in the past. But for some reason, getting injured from playing soccer behind your father's back made all the guilt you've been bottling up return.

Your plan was to go to your bathroom, clean yourself up and then go to sleep. You planned to tell Ego the truth tomorrow, since you believed he'd be asleep.

But just as you're walking through the hallway, you hear Ego leave his office.

"(Y/N)?" He looks at you and his eyes widen when he sees your sleeve, which you had previously used to wipe away your blood. "Are you okay?"

And that's the moment you realize you really have to tell him the truth right now. If he hadn't seen you like this, you probably would have pushed it back even more instead of doing it tomorrow.

After you don't answer, Ego walks closer to you. "Your nose is bleeding." His voice is stern as always, but there's worry in it too. "(Y/N)-chan, what happened?" He gently grabs your chin and raises your head, so he can get a better look at you.

Ego rarely calls you "(Y/N)-chan", he only does it whenever he's worried about you. It's a habit that stuck with him from when you were younger.

You take a deep breath before you start speaking. "Dad, I'm so sorry..."

Ego wonders why you would apologize right now, but he doesn't answer yet. He wants you to explain first.

"I sneaked into the players' area and-" You start, but Ego already interrupts you.

"You did what?" His voice sounds stricter than before. "Why would you do that?"

You want to explain yourself. You want to tell him how lonely you feel all the time. You want to tell him how you never played with someone who has the same soccer ideology as you until now.

But the words don't come out of your mouth.

Ego lets out a frustrated sigh when he realizes you're not going to answer. "Clean yourself up, then meet me in my office. We need to have a serious talk about this."

As your father walks away, you turn around and go over to the bathroom. You hate the current sight of yourself in the mirror. There's still blood on your face, it dripped from your nose down your lip. But fortunately, the bleeding has stopped by now.

You're hesitant about entering your father's office, but it's something you know you can't run away from now. You've already told him what you did. By now, you've calmed down a little, so you're sure you can manage to explain yourself now. But still, you know Ego is going to be incredibly disappointed in you.

You carefully open the door and enter your father's office. He's sitting on his chair, turning his head to you when you walk in. He doesn't speak yet, even after you sit down on the chair in front of his, it takes a few more moments until he says something.

"I can't believe you would do anything behind my back. Especially something like this. Are you even aware of the consequences?"

"I am, but it was just an accident. I've gotten injured in soccer before. It doesn't hurt anymore either, I promise I'm fine."

"That is not what I'm talking about." Ego gets even more frustrated. "You really didn't think this through properly, did you? You could have interfered with the project. You could have ruined it. The players aren't supposed to meet anyone from the outside, especially not you."

As if your guilt about lying wasn't already enough, now the guilt of knowing you could have ruined your father's dream makes you feel even worse.

"I'm really sorry, dad." You attempt to apologize. "I just-"

Ego ignores your apology and simply continues talking. "If you want to play soccer again, we can look for a new team you can join. But in no circumstances are you ever playing with any of the Blue Lock players again."

"...What if I wanted to join Blue Lock?"

Ego sighs and adjusts his glasses. "We already talked about that before Blue Lock started. You're not joining. I'm not letting you ruin your soccer career with this."

"So you think I'll lose because I'm not good enough?"

"You are more than good enough, (Y/N). But Blue Lock isn't fair. Even the greatest players can lose. Besides, not only is it too late to join anyways, you know I have another way planned for you. And that doesn't include you joining Blue Lock."

"But dad-"

"(Y/N), stop it. I'm not saying this as the director of Blue Lock, I'm saying this as your father. You do not belong in there." Ego places a hand on your shoulder and softens his voice a little bit. "I couldn't stand seeing you in there. I couldn't stand seeing you ruin your career like that. Do you understand?"

You hate to admit it, but you know Blue Lock is a place you'd never fit into, despite you being raised with the same egotistical ideology towards soccer.

"Besides, if you were in there, it would be unfair for everyone else. You're my child and even if I tried not to, I'd have some personal biases about you."

"I know, you're right," You admit, avoiding eye contact for a moment. "I just wanted to play soccer with someone who plays it in the same way as I do."

"I understand your reasons, but that doesn't make what you did okay. But it was a one-time thing and nothing really bad happened, so I'm not mad at you."

The pressure of the guilt returns. It makes tears form in your eyes that you can't stop from rolling down your cheeks.

"I-It wasn't a one-time thing..." You stare at the floor as you confess the truth. "I started that when... I think when the second selection began."

Ego uses the hand that previously rested on your shoulder to grab your chin, forcing you to look at him again.

"That was weeks ago." His voice returned to a cold tone. "How often did you sneak in there? How could you hide something like this from me for so long?"

"Twice a week. But it was never for a long time. Never more than an hour."

Ego takes a deep breath and is about to answer, but then he closes his mouth again to rethink what he's going to say. It's obvious that he's not only disappointed but also very angry.

"We're done talking for tonight." Ego gets up from his chair. "I refuse to let my anger out on my child. We'll continue this conversation tomorrow. I need some time to think."

Before you get to answer, Ego exits the room, leaving you all alone in there.

All alone with your guilt.

#bllk #blue lock #bllk headcanons #bllk ego #blue lock headcanons #blue lock ego #bllk oneshot #blue lock oneshot #blue lock x reader #ego jinpachi #jinpachi ego #ego x you #ego x reader #ego jinpachi x you #ego jinpachi x reader #jinpachi ego x you #jinpachi ego x reader

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nowoyas · 10 days ago

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koi no yokan 24: closet door (nishinoya yuu/reader)

First - Prev - Next - M.list - Ao3

A/N: greetings from hell! we are now more or less completely certain that I have sprained my wrist due to the fall down the stairs on Wednesday. this shouldn't affect any update schedules, however, because of the difference in how my brain functions when using the dictation software versus just typing, you may notice a difference in writing quality. I have done my best to keep it at the same quality and the same voice as usual, but there's only so much I can do when I can't type. Even so, I hope you enjoy!

Summary: The final days before prelims.

Warnings and tags: emetophobia, references to child neglect, light suicide ideation

Words: ~3800

You do not answer the door.

Not the bell, not the knocks. Not phonecalls or texts.

And Yuu, predictably, is worried.

He'd assumed, when you didn't leave the house this morning, that your night had been about as rough as anticipated, but the radio silence throughout the day is concerning. Concerning enough that, after ringing the doorbell twice and waiting ten minutes, he's about to go get the camping gear from his house and wait you out.

He rings the doorbell a third time. His phone buzzes a moment later.

[name] to Noya at 19:48

[name]: go away

Noya: not until I know you're okay

[name]: im not

He sighs. He's not going to get anywhere like this.

He remembers the spare key and locates it with ease, walks right in as quietly as he can manage. You're not in the living room, so you must be upstairs—he climbs the stairs, winds down the hall to your room, where the door is shut but not locked. He cracks it just a bit, then knocks. There's a shuffling from within the room.

"Come on, [name]-san," he says softly through the crack.

You don't reply. He opens the door the rest of the way—your futon is still laid out, and in fact looks freshly vacated, based on the fact that you haven't so much as smoothed out the comforter. You've got no less than four plushies laid up in said futon—he suppresses a smile when he spots the one that had been a get-well-soon gift from Shouyo—but you're nowhere in sight.

[name]: I said go away

[name]: I look awful

[name]: I don't want to be real right now please don't make me

"Are you sick?" he asks out loud, frowning. The text comes back quickly.

[name]: in the head yeah

[name]: did you seriously use the spare key to get in because I didn't wanna talk

He shrugs. "I was worried. Last time you skipped a day you at least came to the door."

[name]: getting punched in the face and telling you about my mom wasn't all that bad. Just exhausting

[name]: I literally want to die right now please just go

His heart cracks at the words. "Yeah, when you put it that way, there's no way I'm doing that."

[name]: senpai

[name]: please

He sits down on your futon, legs crossed. "I'm not leaving until I know you're okay, but I can text Okaa-san and let her know you're not up to dinner tonight."

A muffled fuck! leaves the nearby closet. He huffs and moves to sit with his back against the wall beside the closet door. You must have forgotten.

[name]: see now I just feel bad

"You didn't already feel bad?"

[name]: you know what I mean

[name]: you'll miss dinner for sure if you wait until I feel better

[name]: you're gonna die here at the rate I'm going

He shrugs. "I can miss it. I'll be fine."

"Don't you fucking dare," comes the muffled reply. It's obvious, when you finally speak, that you've been crying. "You have games. Tomorrow. You need to be at your best."

"Oh, she talks!" He smiles. It's progress. "You're still coming tomorrow, right?"

Silence, both from the closet door and his phone. His heart drops.

"[name]-san?"

The closet door creaks a little. "Do you want me to?" you ask quietly.

"I don't think I'll play half as good without you there to watch me," he says honestly. "And I need you there as a good luck charm."

"But do you want me there, because—"

"[name]-san. I want you at dinner with my family, and I want you at the matches tomorrow, and I wanted you at practice today, and I want you at every practice after this, and I want you at every match I ever play."

Silence. You pull the door shut. For a moment, he thinks he's said the wrong thing, but then—

[name]: can you get out for two seconds so I can get dressed

"You're coming to dinner?"

[name]: im actually bisexual

"What?"

[name]: im coming out of the closet

He lets out a startled bark of laughter. "Marry me. Don't even get dressed; I don't mind."

[name]: 875

[name]: I mind

[name]: I PROMISE I'll actually let you back in the room once Im dressed

"Fine, fine." He gets up. Leaves the room. Closes the door behind him. There's a moment of shuffling from within—your footsteps approaching. He thinks you're about to open the door for a moment, and then he hears you fumbling with the lock and jerks it open, careful not to hit you with it. "Oh, no you don't. You promised!"

You don't fight it. You let him push open the door the rest of the way, greet him with your hood pulled firmly over your head and an adorable pout. "Only because I promised," you say quietly.

God, you're in a state. Your eyes are red with tears, face swollen. "Do you wanna talk about what happened?"

"He bought me a late birthday cake. He said he didn't know last month was July."

"That's… good, right?"

"He did it right when things got tense and just left. He walked."

"O…kay?"

"So I immediately had a complete mental breakdown and he came back with cake to find me hyperventilating where he left me because the last time someone went for a walk after a tense conversation they fucking died." You lean into him, slowly bringing your arms up to wrap around his torso. He returns the hold tentatively, resting his chin on top of your head.

"Oh." Ohh. He holds you just a bit tighter as the realization sets in. "I'm so sorry."

"'N then he apologized and we talked about Okaa-san for a while and I thought maybe he might actually listen and be home more, but he hesitated and said he'd try." A sniffle. "And we watched volleyball to distract me, but then he—he—"

Your shoulders shake. He pulls away, guides you to sit with him so he can cradle you just a little bit better. (Now is not the time to think about the fact that you started watching volleyball for comfort. He files it away for later.)

"I can't ever come out to him, Noya," you mumble. "He said he was glad I wasn't playing volleyball because all the women—it was some match between women's teams—looked like lesbians. Like it's a bad thing."

A bunch of potential responses race through his head. Everything from what an asshole to okay, like lesbians aren't hot which he's pretty sure he's slightly more qualified to say than the average guy but probably isn't very useful right now. What comes out feels lame and not nearly enough. "That's messed up."

You nod. "It's like—I don't even know what I want from him. Him not being here makes me feel like shit. And when he's actually here I feel worse. And now I have evidence that he'll never accept me for me, and probably if I did come out he wouldn't get the bisexual thing or pull something about how it's fine if I grow out of it and end up with a man, and—and—" You pause. Buckle in on yourself a little as your stomach growls loud enough for Yuu to hear. "I feel sick."

"Have you eaten today, like, at all?"

You shake your head. "I… I didn't get out of bed until I heard you coming up the stairs."

"[name]-san!" he admonishes. "Alright, that's it. Get everything you need for tomorrow."

"Huh?"

"You're coming to dinner. You're gonna eat."

"But why—"

He tilts his head. "I'm gonna ask you to stay the night, and I don't want you to have any "nos". So you gotta get your stuff together and bring it with you to my place before I ask so you don't have the "no" that your stuff is all here and you don't want to drop by in the morning."

You let out a soft laugh, melting into him just a touch. "You're gonna casually ask me to stay the night."

"Well, yeah!" He shakes your shoulder playfully. "You're good luck. You proved it at the training camp. Gotta absorb all the luck I can off you! And, y'know, I sleep way better when I'm cuddling someone, and—"

"Okay, okay. Message received, you wanna cuddle. Is Rina-san gonna be okay with that?" You wriggle out of his hold, go hunting for clothes.

"What do you mean? She loves you."

"I think any reasonable parent might raise an eyebrow at a girl sleeping in the same bedroom as her son. I don't exactly have the concussion to use as an excuse anymore."

He shrugs. "If Satsuki can have her girlfriends stay the night, I don't see why you can't. Besides, it doesn't mean anything, right?" He flashes a smile, winks at you.

You roll your eyes. "I don't like your implications, Mister. And yes, strictly platonic."

"As long as you still come along. Come on, give me more reasons to say no so I can get you to admit you wanna sleep with me tonight!"

It might've been on the nose, but at your flustered squawk and the bag suddenly flung at his face, Yuu thinks it was worth it.

Even better yet, you play along—you're clearly still down, but you set up arguments for him to knock down one by one, even as you finish packing and walk with him back to his place. By the end of the night, over video games and bantering with Satsuki, you've given in—you steal the shower, cuddle right up to him with no pretense. His chest swells with pride at the feeling of your head resting on it at the end of the night, and threatens to burst when he catches a whiff of his own body wash on your skin.

Strictly platonic, his ass.

You wake up to a commotion on the bus. When you turn around in your seat, leaning over Noya to investigate, you find Hinata leaning into the bus aisle, his head between his knees.

"What's going on?" you ask.

"Shouyo's not feeling good," Noya says. "Anxiety, apparently."

You furrow your brow. "Is he going to be okay?"

Tanaka pokes his head into the aisle. "He gets like this before matches. Before our first practice match he literally threw up in my lap."

You cringe. That sounds… bad. "Okay, wait—Tanaka-senpai, switch seats with me."

He blinks. "What?"

"You heard me." You grab Noya's shoulder and slide over his lap. He lets out a strangled noise, hands coming up to steady you as you slide right past him into the aisle. The shuffle is quick and, for your part, painless. You slip past Tanaka—Noya moves into the seat you'd had, and Tanaka takes the newly-opened aisle seat so that you can sit across from Hinata. "Hinata, do me a huge favor and hum for me."

He looks up in confusion, but before he can say anything, he slaps a hand over his mouth and drops his face back between his legs. "W-what?" he asks weakly.

"You heard me. You can hum anything, it doesn't matter what, but your body's gag reflex can't actually work if you're humming."

He begins to hum—the sound is tuneless, and you're not sure it comes from any particular song so much as his anxiety. You smile softly and reach out a hand rub small circles into his shoulder blade.

"Okay, that's good. Just keep humming for me no matter what while we wait for Coach Ukai to pull the bus over." You speak quickly and softly, but for the last part, you raise your voice insistently so that you're heard. The sharp look you flash in the rear view mirror catches Coach Ukai's eye, and you think he nods in reply. Good.

"I can't believe you're getting nervous like this again," Tsukishima says. "You know, if you didn't gorge yourself like you were talking about this morning, you might not have made yourself sick—"

You don't look up when you speak. "Tsukishima."

The anxious buzz of the other guys falls quiet.

"Do you think you're helping right now?"

Silence.

"Exactly. Not the time. So shut up."

There are a few stifled laughs, but you don't care about those right now. Your focus is on Hinata. It seems to be anxiety, rather than panic—that's good. You have better techniques for anxiety attacks than panic attacks anyway.

"Okay, Hinata, I'm going to ask you to do something for me, but you can't stop humming, okay?"

He nods shakily.

"So what I need from you right now is to just look around, and I want you to focus on picking out five things that you can see, okay?"

He nods, and as he continues to hum the same random notes, he picks up his head to look around.

"When you're done, you can just nod at me to let me know, okay?"

You watch his eyes settle on distinct points—first to you, then to Tanaka in the row beside you. Then to the roof of the bus, then to a sulking Tsukishima a few rows back, and finally, to his own shaking hands in his lap. When he's done, he looks at you again and nods.

"Good. You're doing great. Now, I want you to find four things that you can touch right now. Can you do that for me? When you do, I need you to go out of your way to actually touch those things. Focus on how they feel, alright?"

Again you watch him work—he reaches out and brushes fingertips against your arm. Then against the seat of the bus, then against his shorts, and then, after a moment of hesitation, against his own hair. You keep your hand rubbing his back the whole time and nod.

"Tanaka-senpai, can you hand me my bag from the row? Thanks. Keep humming for me, okay, Hinata?"

He nods. He's switched to a random lullaby, and you smile when you recognize the tune.

"Okay, I know this will be hard because you have to keep humming, but try your best for me, okay? I need you to find three things that you can hear for me. It can be any three things, including your own voice, but I want you to take a moment to notice how they sound as you're listening to them."

He tilts his head this way and that, and for just a moment, his humming falters. You force down the surge of panic as you see him lurch a little, but he picks back up with the humming and nods to you when he's picked out his three things.

"Good." You rifle around in your bag for a moment, searching for something. When you find it, you bring it to the top of the bag and open the cap. "Two things you can smell next. You've probably got the one from the bus air, but just in case, I have something to make it easier."

He sniffs at the air a moment, and once he has, you hold out your open bottle of hand lotion—vanilla-scented—for him to smell. Once he's done, you put it away and immediately reach back into your bag for your water bottle. With honestly perfect timing, the bus slows to a stop on the side of the road.

"Almost done, Hinata. We're gonna make our way off the bus first, and then we'll get to that last one."

You walk behind him down the bus aisle. The entire time, your hand doesn't leave his back—you're careful to keep soothing him, to keep him as grounded as you can get him. When the two of you are clear of the bus, you purposely remove your hand from his back and take three very large steps away. "Alright. Stop humming and let it out."

He obeys to the letter—the humming stops, and then he lurches over and begins to throw up. It's loud and gross and smells bad, but at the very least, it's on the side of the road and not on the bus where you'll be trapped with the smell for another forty-five minutes or so. "I'm so sorry," he cries, doubled over with his hands on his knees.

You uncap the water bottle and hand it to him. "None of that. We weren't finished with the grounding exercise. Here's one thing you can taste. I would recommend swishing and spitting to get the stomach acid off of your teeth and the taste out of your mouth a little bit."

Again he obeys, swishing the water in his mouth and spitting with a distasteful look on his face. "Ugh. That was disgusting."

"Does it feel a little better, though?"

"Yes, it does... Thank you…"

"You can keep that water bottle; you'll want to drink the rest of it in slow sips until we get to the tournament. Hydration and all that."

At the mention of the impending matches, he looks a little pale again. You reach out and replace your hand on his back, hoping that the motion will soothe him a little bit. The two of you get back onto the bus and into your seats, where you lean in with a sympathetic look.

"Nerves about the matches, then?"

He nods weakly. "I just—I don't want to mess up today. I don't want to bring everyone down. I just want to stay on the court as long as possible."

"And you're going to. You know that, right? Even if you have one bad day, you've earned a place on the court already. It's not like Coach made you a starter just because he felt bad."

"But…"

"I mean, you're going to be fine. All of you are. Sure, anxiety is a thing and I don't expect you to just stop feeling it, but you should know that all you have to do is everything you've already been doing. And if that's the case, then you don't really have to worry, because you already know you can do it. You've been doing it. So you know you're capable of it. Y'know?"

He looks at you with tears in his eyes. "[surname]-san…"

"In the first place, I've spent the past two months watching you guys play and I'm pretty confident that you're gonna do just fine today. Even if you can't trust yourself, you can trust my judgment, right?"

"Yeah... you're right. You're so nice... seriously."

You shake your head. "I'm not nice. I'm talking about statistics. You know that we keep those, right? And I like to look at them. so I can say with absolute certainty that all of you have been getting more solid in the things that you're trying and that you've been steadily closing the point gap between you and high-level teams. So you should know that when I say that I'm confident in you doing well today, it isn't based on feelings. It'd be rude not to trust me when I put so much thought into it, right?"

He smiles. An unfamiliar arm reaches from the row in front of you and shoves your shoulder playfully. It's Tanaka. "Man, Noya-san's right. You really are a tsundere. It's okay to say that you like us and trust us to win, you know?"

You bat at his hand with an unimpressed look. "Yeah, when I feel that way, I'll say it. Until then, I'll say what I mean. Thank you for the suggestion, though."

"But man, [surname]-san, you handled that really good." Hinata tilts his head. "How did you know the trick with the humming?"

You laugh and shrug your shoulders. "Had the stomach flu last year and had to ride it out alone. I think I threw up every hour at exactly the hour for like, two days straight or something. I didn't really want to have to clean anything up, so I figured out how to make sure I didn't have to. And you know what? It worked!"

He furrows his brow, giving you a sad look. "You had to go through that alone?"

A nervous laugh, a shrug. "It's not that big a deal. Otoo-san was busy with work, and it's just the two of us, so I didn't really wanna bother him. In any case, I got through it just fine, and if I hadn't had to deal with that, then I wouldn't have had the trick to share with you now. So it worked out! I'm glad for it."

"If you're sure…"

"Anyways, how are you feeling now?"

He smiles. "Better. Thanks."

You spend the rest of the bus ride to the tournament venue talking to Hinata. He seems, for the most part, calmer than before. You'd like to think that you do a pretty good job of keeping his mind off of the anxiety—you manage to ramble engagingly enough about the most recent book that you read, although you don't remember much about it given that you read it before the concussion. By the time you're all getting off the bus at the venue, he seems more or less thoroughly calmed.

You wait for Tsukishima, hands behind your back. When he steps off the bus, you grab at his arm with a tilt of your head. "Sorry for snapping earlier, by the way. I don't mind the way you act the rest of the time, but I was just worried about making sure that everything was sorted out right now. It wasn't personal, you know?"

He shrugs. "It's fine."

On the way in, a pouting Noya falls in step with you. You roll your eyes. "Dare I ask?"

"Nothing."

"Uh-huh. Nothing. Are you jealous? Is that it?"

"Yes," he says. "I'm very jealous. Next time, I'll be the one to get sick on the bus so you can lovingly rub my back for ten minutes."

"You're gonna make yourself sick from nerves?" You roll your eyes. "You? Yeah, sure. I'll believe that for sure. And lovingly? Dude, he was gonna throw up. Physical touch grounds people when they're anxious."

He sighs, draping his arms around you. "Fine. You were really good with Shouyo. I'm proud of you."

"Proud of me?"

"Yeah. You know, the flu thing."

Oh. Yeah. You guess you didn't really get too anxious talking about your family or anything. You shrug. "Thanks, I guess. It didn't feel good."

"But you did a really good job. Marry me?"

You huff and bump your head against his shoulder. "Let me run the numbers... Maybe if you ask another eight hundred and seventy-four times."

"I can do that."

You're starting to worry that he actually can.

Tags: @deeplightgarden @idonthaveanameideayet @dusstory @kazunish

#my fics #nishinoya yuu/reader #nishinoya yuu x reader #yuu nishinoya x reader #yuu nishinoya/reader #hq reader insert #haikyuu reader insert

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newtonsheffield · 2 years ago

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Hi Molly, hope you are well! is hurts like heaven still going to be a fic?🥺 could we please have a little snippet or anything of them or even edwina and josie they are so cute and I miss them so much! Have a good weekend 😊

Um. Maybe it will be.

I don't know, my enthusiasm for it has dulled a little after some criticism seemed to stack against it. Much like with the new chapter of all that i am (all that i ever was). I don't know, justification and saying you don't know the whole story yet takes a toll. Tiring. Eats away at enthusiasm.

But here's this.

Kate had spent most of her life it felt like, walking the three streets between their house and the Bridgerton House. She'd tagged along with Mary at first, to drop off and collect Edwina, then as she'd gotten a little older she'd volunteered to go by herself, hooking Edwina out of whatever game she and Tony were playing, and even when Edwina had been sixteen, Mary had sighed before she put dinner on the table while Kate was home from university and her father had just been getting home.

"Can you go and make sure your sister is planning to come home?"

She'd walk those streets slowly, giving Edwina another few minutes with her best friend before rapping on the neat front door , Wisteria climbing up the side of the house.

"Kate!" Mrs Bridgerton would always say kindly, gesturing her inside.

"Hi, Mrs Bridgerton, I'm just here for Edwina." She'd say, though the woman must have already known.

"They're upstairs." Mrs Bridgerton would say, and the old they got the more exasperated she became. "There was a lot of whispering before they went up so I'd knock twice if I were you if you don't want to get an eyeful of something on Tony's laptop. Lord knows I've not had the balls to look on that in years."

Kate would always stifle a laugh and make her way upstairs, rolling her eyes as she heard the laptop snap and magazines rustling about seconds after she called out.

The welcome she'd always received had been warm. Even the last time she'd been here, when she'd dressed in black Mr Bridgerton had been lain to rest and as she'd looked at her own father who'd been right there in the car beside him on their way from a meeting, everything felt numb.

But she was sure her welcome wouldn't be so warm this time. Not with Violet's son's hand on her thigh as they made their way through traffic anxiety gnawing in Kate's stomach like a dog with a bone.

"You're not nervous are you?" Anthony chuckled from the driver's seat, turning the wheel one handed as they pulled onto the street, the other occupied with keeping contact between them.

Kate rolled her eyes, "I'm meeting your mum, of course I'm nervous."

Anthony's brow furrowed, that little worried crease between his eyebrows far too prominent. "You've met my mum literally thousands of times. She sends you a christmas present."

"That's kind of the point." Kate sighed, reaching for his fingers, intertwining them tightly. "That was before all this happened. She might not feel the same way now."

He wiggled his eyebrows as they pulled into the curb, darting around to open her car door "Are you worried my Mum's going to ask you for compensation for my virginity? Only fair that you giver her a few chickens, you did seduce me an innocent young man, into a relationship."

Kate rolled her eyes, poking his ribs as Anthony made to throw the door open. "I actually think you seduced me, somehow."

"You're damn fucking right I did." Anthony threw the front door open, hollering up the stairs before Kate could stop him. "Mum! I'm here!"

"Anthony, jesus." Kate hissed at him, "Give her a second."

"What? If we loitered on the stoop she'd think you were seducing me even further with your feminine wiles." Anthony was grinning at her, pushing back with his hips until he had her pinned against the bannister, his arms either side of her.

"My feminine wiles?" Kate scoffed, trying to pretend his closeness was having no effect at all "What are you-?!"

"Well, some things never change."

Violet Bridgerton was standing in the doorway to the kitchen a slightly amused expression on her face as Kate shoved hard against Anthony's chest who seemed undeterred by his mother's presence and kept his arms tightly around her anyway.

"Mum, you remember Kate." His lips were still tickling her ear as he spoke, shivering down her throat.

"Of course, darling. It's been a little while."

Kate's cheeks were burning as she forced words out. "It's lovely to see you again, Mrs Bridgerton. It's been too long."

Violet hummed gently before she turned to her son. "Anthony, go and make sure Gregory's not got lego up his nose courtesy of his sister again, make sure they're ready for dinner."

Anthony kissed Kate's cheek lightly, before he bounded up the stairs two at a time, "Alright troublemakers, your leader's home!"

Kate couldn't help the smile on her face as she watched him go, his eyes bright smile huge.

"He's a good boy, always has been." Violet hummed softly, catching Kate's attention, "Even though he's not a boy anymore."

Kate's stomach swirled uncomfortably for a moment before she cleared her throat, "I hope you don't feel that I'm... taking advantage of him in some way. I know I'm a little older than he is but-"

"You're not even five years older than him."

Kate flushed again, "I know but, he's sweet and kind, and capable of knowing his own feelings and I love him, Mrs Bridgerton, and he's happy with me and I hope that means more to you than anything else."

Not for the first time Kate wondered if it would matter so much if she hadn't been the one their parents had trusted to look after him and Edwina. If she hadn't grown up ahead of him. She supposed she'd never know. "And I never thought about him like that until recently."

Violet stayed staring back at her, blinking in surprise at her forthrightness before a delighted laugh broke free of her chest, echoing around the entrance room. "Kate, I think you've... I'm very happy for you and Anthony. He's had feelings for you for a very long time and I'm not... overly surprised." She leaned in a little conspiratorially, "Truth be told I'm only a little cross because I now owe your mother £100, she won the bet."

And despite herself, Kate laughed as well.

#hurts like heaven #kathony #anthony x kate #kate sharma #kate sheffield #anthony bridgerton #molly’s asks and answers

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chuuyrr · 3 years ago

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1st years + sukuna babysits scarlet witch! baby fushiguro! reader

jujutsu kaisen x reader

masterlist of the series

warning(s): none

i thought of another one lmao + i also think that sukuna would be a big softie for scarlet witch, baby fushiguro reader, he's definitely not canonically but in my works, he is a softie.

you don't usually stay with your older, half-brother megumi, but he'd be happy to look after you when gojo can't.

gojo had to go somewhere again so he left you in your half older brother's care and of course, nobara at yuji comes along with that.

"i will be away for a couple of days, look after kikufuku over here okay?"

gojo kissed your mochi-like cheeks, watching you giggle and smile in delight. "don't give your brother and his friends too much trouble now!"

"we'll watch [name]-chan, don't you worry bout' a thing gojo-sensei!" chimed yuji and nobara as megumi took you from gojo's arms after you had kissed his cheek goodbye and that's when the chaos began.

"gumi-nii!" you squealed, snuggling up in his arms like the bundle of sunshine you were.

"that's so cute!"

"he just called fushiguro 'gumi-nii'!"

this caused yuji and nobara to coo and gawk at your cuteness. megumi, on the other hand, buried his face in your hair. he did not want to be seen blushing from your cuteness.

"hello [name]." he lifted his head to smile at you.

nobara asked in a baby-like voice. "you are such a cutiepatootie! what do you wanna do [name]-chan?~"

"oh! do you guys wanna take [name] out?" yuji suggested, "we can go out to eat and walk."

"i wanna go out!" your eyes practically had stars in them as they lit up with excitement.

as much as megumi wanted to stay in with you today, he couldn't resist you. so he agreed to yuji's suggestion and brought you outside of jujutsu high along with yuji and nobara.

what they didn't know was that little [name]-chan can sometimes be a cat with zoomies. you were always bouncing and running up and about whenever something piques your interests.

you might have tiny legs, but those legs can freaking run a mile if you wanted. luckily, yuji was fast as you are—meaning he was the only who could run and catch you whenever you've ran off too far or to a not-so-safe place like in the middle of a freaking road, chasing after a dog leashed by its owner with cars zooming by left and right.

he'd always be there to swoop you in his arms which would always make you giggle and bubble with laughter, naively thinking you were now playing a game of tag or chase with yuji.

megumi, nobara and yuji took you to a restaurant and got you your favorite katsudon dish. you happily ate your food. after eating lunch, they took you to your favorite pokemon stores and your brother got you a pikachu stuffed that was twice your size just because.

megumi is your brother. it may not look like it, but he really cares for you and your happiness means the world to him.

megumi was upset to find out that his little sister was going to be exploited to the zenin just like him, which confused him since you had no cursed energy of sort.

he figured they would just train you to become like his and your father. he was glad that gojo took you in and raised you in his care but god, gojo should have really told him about your 'cursed energy' and exceptional capabilities from the start.

after spending the entire day with them, you got tired and yuji offered to carry you since megumi had already been doing that since earlier.

you were cuddled up to his chest, your tiny arms wrapped around his neck securely along with the pikachu stuffed toy that megumi bought you. you snored peacefully in your sleep. you were absolutely tired from the zoomies you had.

"look, [name]-chan fell asleep."

nobara whispered and whipped out her phone to take a picture of you. "she's so cute! how the hell is she related to you fushiguro?"

yuji nervously laughed upon recalling the memory that occurred earlier wherein you literally disappeared from their sight when a pokemon mascot outside the store caught your interest. "she ran so much earlier. we even lost track of her for a second."

megumi assured his friend. "don't worry, i won't tell gojo-sensei."

sukuna took form on yuji's cheek and spotted your peacefully sleeping figure. "what is this brat doing?"

yuji yelled in a whisper at the king of curses, not wanting to wake you up. "oi, don't call her that sukuna and shut up! can't you see she's sleeping?"

"this one's weak, i don't sense any cursed energy from her." sukuna claimed, earning an irk on yuji's temple.

yuji retorted. "she's a child, you dumbass."

apparently, little did you know that as yuji and sukuna bickered in the physical world, you had somehow astral projected into sukuna's domain without his or any of their notice.

ryomen sukuna

sukuna was sitting on his throne with eyes closed when he suddenly heard pitter patters. your footsteps to be exact. opening one eye, he found you looking at the place in complete awe.

well that was quite the first impression of a four year old, normally kids like you would cower in fear from the hazy red environment that was filled with bones and malice.

how are you not scared or creeped out even the slightest? but most importantly, he couldn't help wonder at how you got here without him noticing.

he did not feel a single ounce of cursed energy from you, let alone any connection with you. you didn't eat one of his fingers now, did you now? sukuna knew how irresponsible his vessel can be at times but, surely not? right?

"oi, how did you get here?" sukuna called your attention.

"yuji-nii?" you squeaked out, tilting your head at him like a confused puppy.

"i'm not that brat." sukuna furrowed his brows at you. "i asked you a question first."

you ran up to his throne with a smile on your face, you looked at him with those sweet and naive eyes of yours.

"then, who are you? this place is so cool, you have pretty clothes too!"

sukuna blinked at you. how were you not afraid of him? or this place in general? were you that oblivious?

"sukuna." he told you, his eyes still expressing confusion. "you still haven't answered my question. how did you get in here?"

"i dunno." you giggled in response, "but i like it here! i love the color red."

what the hell did you mean by that? sukuna raised a brow at you and straightened his back. he watched as you crept closer to him, your arms resting on his knees as you looked at him with a smile and star-lit eyes.

he peered at you. "you're not supposed to be here brat."

sukuna raised his hand, ready to bring you back to the physical world with a flick of his hand, but his breathing hitched when you still remained. there was a strong force that appeared to be stopping him.

"what the fuck? how are you doing that?"

you blinked, clearly oblivious "do what?"

sukuna sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. his cursed energy and even techniques were useless against you. it left him stunned, but mostly confused. he still couldn't understand why and how you were doing that when he couldn't feel a single drop of cursed energy from your soul.

you suddenly decided to tap his knee which caught his attention. "hey!"

withdrawing his hand, he looked at you with a questioning look. "what do you want now, brat?"

"up up." you made grabby hands towards him, wanting sukuna to pick you up and snuggle with you just like how yuji did when you fell asleep.

sukuna clicked his tongue. he felt like he was being bewitched by your cuteness and your mysterious presence. he would most likely choose to yell no at you and leave you to cry, but something compelled him not to do that.

could it be a brother-instinct? was that even a thing? it better be because there was no way that he was going to be a father to you. whatever the hell this human emotion he was feeling, it felt so foreign.

after a couple of seconds, he reached out to you and picked you up just like you had wanted. sukuna lifted you in the air, making you giggle and laugh. it made him scoff and smile at the same time. some troublesome brat you were.

"tell me, how did you do it? what is your secret brat?" sukuna pressed, continued to pry. "you know, you look just like that fushiguro brat. you're not his child are you?"

you shook your head, still smiling. "gojo is my dad! megumi is my brother."

sukuna raised a brow at you, clearly piqued with interest. he was quick to assume that gojo was the one taking care of you as your father figure whilest being related to that fushiguro but, if you're related to him, it could mean you're just as talented as he was. you literally just entered his domain without his notice. that's literally talent.

"what cursed technique did you do to get here? come on, tell me." sukuna pinched your mochi-like cheeks, discreetly admiring how squishy and kissable they were.

"i still don't get what you're saying." you furrowed your brows together, pouting.

you really did not understand what sukuna was trying to tell you. gojo still hasn't taught you anything about cursed energy and techniques, and it was probably because he believes that it isn't what you have.

sukuna sighed in defeat, finally getting the message that you really didn't know how. he sat you on his lap, staring at you intently. you looked just your brother, you got his eyelashes and gaze whenever you were curious or thinking. but you had [color] hair and [color] eyes, he assumed you got it from your mother.

"you comfortable brat?"

sukuna asked you, gently pulling your hair back from your shoulders as he combed his fingers through your hair. he watched you nod and hum in content.

sukuna eventually cradled you in his arms until you began to close your eyes. perhaps staying in here with him was draining you out in a way. he may not exactly know the answer, but something told him that you had a special kind of 'cursed energy'. one that you can conceal involuntarily.

but right before you fell asleep, you opened your eyes, half-lidded from drowsiness. you called out to him, "kuna?"

"what do you want this time?" he swallowed thickly.

you let out a small yet tired yawn. "can i call you kuna-nii?"

sukuna brushed the loose strands of your hair, allowing your head to rest on his arms and flicked your forehead. his actions might have said no, but that didn't stop you. you smiled as your eyes finally gave in, but not before you whispered. "goodnight, kuna-nii."

yuji finally felt your presence enter his conscience and was left stunned how you were able to do that. he heard your voice inside his head just like he had heard sukuna's. paled, he looked at megumi.

"[name] just entered sukuna's domain. i heard her voice." megumi and nobara panicked.

immediately, you were woken up by your brother.

"[name]! wake up!"

you opened your eyes with a yawn, confused at the panicked expressions they each held. "huh?"

"gumi-nii?" you rubbed your eyes. "is daddy here already?"

"are you okay? did.. did you have a good dream?" megumi swallowed thickly, carefully wording his question. he didn't want to worry you or make you panic.

you perked up at his question. the drowsiness you had subsided instantly. "yeah! i was in a pretty red place and there was this man who looked like yuji-nii."

"did he hurt you?" megumi asked in concern, taking you from yuji's arms in a panic to inspect any injuries, which you shook your head to that in response.

you smiled gleefully, "he made up-up with me just like yuji."

the three of them glanced at each other in disbelief at how you were able to do that and looks like gojo would need to hear a thing or two from them, and maybe finally explain your cursed energy to them.

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dreamifics · 3 years ago

Text

Love and Monsters

Steve Harrington x Reader!Henderson

Oneshot

Y/N Henderson's life was not like any other normal teenager's life, on a very young age her only friends was her brother, Dustin and his friends.. She was not popular in highschool, but she was not a nobody neither.. Y/N was just invisible, lost in the sea of students.. She was almost through highschool though, one day her life was turned upside down, literally and figuratively.. It's been months since the 'thing' happend, but she was still shaken up.

Y/N was laying in bed, My Generation blasting from her stereo.. She was home alone, her mother was out with some friends, her brother was hanging out with 'King Steve'.. Ever since Steve helped them about Dart, she grew closer to Steve but their short lived friendship ended when Dustin left for camp and Steve worked on their family business while she was stuck preparing herself for college.. Y/N misses Steve, his unfunny jokes and oh god--his laugh..

A loud knock startled her, she shot up from her bed, memories of what happend was flashing back to her.. Despite what she tells her friend, she was not okay.. She almost died twice and that opened up trauma's and issues within herself..

Another loud knock startled her, Y/N shakes her head and just ran to the door.. Reaching their front door, her icy hands made contact with the cold steel knob..

It revealed a disheveled Dustin and Steve, she could tell that there were excitement dripping all over them.. Steve was still wearing his sailor work uniform, he looked cute to Y/N but she once threw that thought in the back of her mind..

"What's up?" She questioned the two.

Dustin just smiled and pushed pass her, while Steve was reluctant to go in.. Steve avoided Y/N for almost the whole summer because of the daunting realization that he was catching feelings for her and that scared him.. Y/N was the kind of girl that likes to watch nerdy movies, spend hours playing games with a bunch of kids and save the world two times.. However, Steve was scared, he was still stuck in the unjustified rules of highschool and popularity. . He still wanted to be 'King Steve', but he also wanted to be Y/N's..

"Nice outfit, sailor boy.." Y/N winked and laughs at Steve, he just shakes his head and went inside their house..

Steve made his way to Dustin's room with Y/N right behind him, but before reaching Dustin's room, he passed Y/N's room.. He unconsciously stopped as he looks around, observing every corner of her room.

There were posters plastered all over her walls, books were all around her room in her bed, shelves and even floors.. In the other side she had a small collection of music that made Steve smile.. Because they had the exact same taste, she is the perfect girl.

"If you want to go in, you're free to wander around my room, anytime.."

Steve turned around to face Y/N, he misses her.. How Y/N sarcastic remarks leave her sweet lips or how she rolls her eyes whenever she see something stupid.

"I might just take you up on that.."

"Hm-mm.. You didn't even talk to me when Dustin left, you broke my heart, Steviee.." She jokes, but it sounded a little bitter.

Y/N did get hurt, Steve stopped talking to her when Dustin left, it seems like Steve didn't really like her as much as she thinks he did. Y/N was bored and got stuck just studying and sometimes hanging out with the party.. It was fun but she was looking forward to hanging out with Steve.

"I'm sorry about that, I didn't want to see my old friends hanging out with someone like yo---" Steve stopped his sentence, he didn't mean that.. His mind was a mess, he said those things because he didn't want Y/N finding out his stupid feelings

"Right..Yeah, I get it.."

"Y/N that's not what I me--"

"Cause King Steve shouldn't be hanging out with people like me?Gotcha.."

Steve didn't even had the time to reply, he was met with Y/N's slamming door.. He didn't mean that.. Steve loved hanging out with Y/N, he want to give her something special.. Steve wanted something more from Y/N.. He knew exactly what and he didn't need a reason why but Steve wanted to give Y/N something more..

Y/N was hurt, she didn't know why but Steve words brought devastation to her.. She felt disappointed and upset, Y/N was expecting something special.. She didn't know what or why but she was expecting something more from Steve.

Y/N was dropping off Dustin to the mall where Steve was working, her lips were in a unsual frown.. Y/N wasn't usally like this, she was having a bad week, Steve just hurt her feelings and she was taking it much harder, it was very unsual.. The two Henderson was making their way to the Scoops Ahoy shop, Dustin was rambling about a message he picked up while contacting his girlfriend.

"Are you listening?" Her brother asked as they reach the store.

"Yepp, you should go in now.."

"Y/N, this could be a good thing!"

"I know..If you need my help, you can find me in the food court.."

"Y/N.."

"Yeah, Dus?"

"Are you okay?"

Y/N's mind went blank, she hated lying to her brother but she didn't want to worry anyone. She laughs and messed Dustin's hair.

"Of course.. Now go, you know where to find me.." With that she left..

Y/N was not okay, the last time she slept was a month ago.. Nightmares kept crawling back to her, she was growing more paranoid by the day.. She was not okay, but she couldn't tell anyone that.. Everyone else is okay, even Wil who had it more rough than her. And to top that up, she was broken hearted by Steve's rejection of their friendship.. Y/N just massaged the bridge of her nose, when will she be fine?

Dustin and Steve was in the corner of the mall with binoculars in their eyes, Steve saw Y/N.. Sitting alone in the corner, a walkman in her ears and a book in hand.. Y/N was mouthing the word as her eyes read every word on that book and Steve couldn't help but feel all giddy and guilty inside.

"You see anything?" Dustin snapped Steve back to their current task.

"Uh, I guess I don't totally know what I'm looking for.'' Steve answered honestly, Y/N distracted him again.

"Evil Russians."

"Yeah, exactly. I don't know what an evil Russian looks like."

"All blond, not smiling."

"Mm-hmm?" Steve's eyes didn't looked for any Russians, his eyes drifted to Y/N spot but she was gone.. Where did she go? He couldn't help but worry, was she talking to someone else?

"Also, look for earpieces, camo, duffel bags, that sort of thing." Dustin added.

"Right, okay, duffel bags." Steve darts his eyes away from Y/N seat but it only fell on a girl he asked out earlier.

"Oh, you've gotta be kidding me." Steve mutters.

"What?" Dustin questioned.

"Anna Jacobi's talking with that meathead Mark Lewinsky."

"If you're not gonna focus, just gimme the binoculars."

Dustin got annoyed by his distracted partner, he should have brought his sister along.. But he knew that Y/N was not okay, she seemed distant and lost in her own mind.. Always spacing out and Dustin can hear her cries from his room, it killed him to see her loving and hyper sister transform into a walking corpse.

"Aw, Jesus Christ, whatever happened to standards?"

"I mean, Lewinsky never even came off the bench." Steve rambled on, annoying Dustin.

"Dude, you are the worst spy in history, you know that?"

The two fought for the binoculars, but they just looked stupid.. Dustin initially gave up and gave the binoculars to Steve.

"I don't get why you're looking at girls. You have the perfect one in front of you."

"Seriously, if you say Robin again..." Steve closes his eyes waiting for Robin's name to come up but it never did.

"No, Y/N.. My sister.."

Steve's heart clenched at the mention of her name, he wants Y/N too.. What can he do? Y/N hates his ass now, he was a jerk and he didn't deserve Y/N.

"No, man, she's not my type." Steve answered while he diverts his eyes away from Dustin.

"I saw you staring at her closed door for about 5 minutes."

Steve eyes grew wide at the realization that Dustin was watching the whole time.. Dustin just shakes his head, if he was asked he'd say that her sister felt the same way..

"She's not even... in the ballpark of what my type is, all right?"

"What's your type again? Not awesome?"

"Thank you."

"Hm."

"For you information, your sister is too sarcastic, she's too nerdy for me.."

"Also, she's too...boyish.."

Beautiful, that's what he wanted to say..

"Dude, that's my sister you're talking about, and besides she's not like that.. She's nerdy but so what? Y/N's also not boyish, she's just secured with her masculinity.."

Dustin's word echoed throughout Steve's system, he already knew that.. But somehow hearing it from another person's perspective made him like you more.

"Y/N's just not my type.." He lied..

Y/N was everything he ever wanted in a girl.

"Thanks for the clarification, Harrington." A voice surprised the two.

Y/N was standing behind them, her arms crossed.. Steve's eyes widen in surprise, did she hear everything? He didn't mean that, what did he mean?

"I didn't mean t--"

"Dustin, if you told me you'll stalk people in malls, I should've brought you to a psychiatrist.." Y/N ignored Steve and just focused on her brother.. Y/N would be lying if she haven't felt more hurt by the words Steve dropped.. She had been listening since the talk about girls came up, Y/N spotted the two doing eccentric things and she decided to eavesdrop.

"No, it's called spying.." Dustin rolled his eyes at her sister remarks while Steve was still frozen..

"What's the difference?" Y/N asked, her eyes still focused on he brother..

"It's just different, okay? Were looking for the--" Dustin stopped and looks around to see if anybody was near..

"Russians?" Y/N continued in a loud tone.

"Shh!" Both Steve and her brother shushed her. Y/N was surpised, she glares at the two and moved closer to them.

"Fine, can I tag along? I'm bored and it'll be nice to be a national hero."

The two looked at each other, Steve was nervous.. Y/N obviously didn't want him around, but this could be a chance for him to apologize to Y/N.

"Sure, you can help us look for russians with dufflebags and camo." Dustin pulled her sister to his side.

"That's kinda racis--"

"No, it's not!" Dustin cuts her sister off making Y/N laugh..

"Whatever you say Dus.."

And that's how she ended up inside a theater with two kids and two drugged teenagere.. Y/N's breathing was heavy, they were captured by Russians just moments ago.. Adrenaline was pumping through her veins, she thought this town was finally normal again, but turns out she was wrong.. Very very wrong..

They needed to get out of this hellish mall, Y/N need to find out if there's still russians lurking out, looking for them.

"The two of you need to stay here and take care of them." Y/N instructs to her brother, she pointed at a floopy Steve and Robin.

"Wait--Where are you going?!" Dustin stopped her by pulling her arm.

"I'm going to see if those fuckers are still looking for us.."

"No, we'll come with you.."

"Dustin, you need to stay here and keep a low profile.."

"Y/N don't be a hero.."

"Hey, Dipshit!I'm not trying to be a hero, what I'm doing is protecting you guys because our two friends are drugged and beaten while we brought a little kid into our mess!And I will do everything to keep you all safe, even if that means I get hurt or killed!"

Dustin knew that there's no talking Y/N out of this, her sister was right.. Taking a deep breath, he just nods and hugs her sister..

"Just please, stay safe.." Dustin was in the verge of tears but Y/N held him tight in her arms.. Dustin pulled back, Y/N gave her brother a comforting smile, she rubbed his cheeks and pat his head.

"I'll be okay, I'm a Henderson for god's sake.."

Dustin laughs as tears stroll in his face, she kissed his forehead and walked away, trying not to attract attention.. Taking a deep breath she left the theater, she'll do whatever it takes to keep her brother and her friends.. Y/N's mind flew to Steve, she was pissed off but she was not sure anymore.. The way he saved them and got beat up for them, she couldn't find a reason to be mad at him, all she can think about is his childlish look and how hot he is in his sailor uniform. Y/N just shakes those thoughts away and tried to focus on her task..

Russians..

Steve and Robin were throwing up in a seperate cubicles, they were getting the drugs out of their system.. Retching and puking can be heard all through out the theater bathroom, Steve groans and flushes the toilet.

"The ceiling stopped spinning for me. Is it still spinning for you?" Robin's voice can be heard from the other cubicle.

"Holy shit. No. You think we puked it all up?" Steve rested his back to the mini wall inside the cubicle..

"Maybe. Ask me something.."

"Interrogate me." Robin said in a mocking russian accent.

"Okay. Interrogate you. Sure. Um... When was the last time you, uh, peed your pants?"

"Today."

"What?"

"When the Russian doctor took out the bone saw."

"Oh... All right, my turn."

"Okay. Hit me."

"Have you... ever been in love?"

"Yep. Nancy Wheeler. First semester, senior year." Steve imitates a gunshot.

"Are you still in love with Nancy?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"I found someone else, she's a little bit better for me.It's crazy. Ever since Dustin got home, he's been saying, 'You know, you gotta find your Suzie. You gotta find your Suzie.' "

"Wait, who's Suzie?"

"It's some girl from camp, I guess his girlfriend. To be honest with you, I'm not 100% sure she's even real."

" But that's not- that's not really the point. That doesn't matter. The point is, this girl, you know, the one that I like, it's somebody that I... didn't even talk to in school. And I don't even know why."

"Maybe 'cause Tommy H. would've made fun of me or... I wouldn't be... prom king. It's stupid. I mean, Dustin's right, it's all just a bunch of bullshit anyways. Because, when I think about it, I should've been hanging out with this girl the whole time."

"First of all, she hates me now because of a stupid thing I said but when we hanged out, we were bonding and shit.. She was perfect for me, she's nerdy, hangs out with kids too much.. She likes the same things I like, her brother is my bestfriend.. Sometimes I wonder if she's real, because she's too perfect."

"Wait--You like Y/N?"

"Yeah, ever since last year.. I like her so damn much, I can't even believe that I said to her that I shouldn't be hanging out with someone like her."

"YOU SAID THAT?" Robin's voice boomed out all over the bathroom, Steve just sighs and slids out of the cubicle..

"Unfortunately, yes.."

Steve slid in to Robins cubicle, she was glaring at him.

"If you ask me, Y/N doesn't deserve someone like me.. She--She's too nice to be caught up in my miserable life.. And besides she would never like me.."

"I think you're still high.."

"No, I'm not.."

"Do you remember what I said about Click's class? About me being jealous and, like, obsessed?"

"Yeah?"

"It isn't because I had a crush on you. It's because... she wouldn't stop staring at you.."

"Mrs. Click?" Robin chuckles and just shakes her head.

"Y/N Henderson, I wanted her to look at me. But... she couldn't pull her eyes away from you and your stupid hair. And I didn't understand, because you would get bagel crumbs all over the floor. And you asked dumb questions. And you were a douchebag. And- And you didn't even like her then and... I would go home... and just scream into my pillow."

"But Y/N's a girl.."

"Steve.."

"Oh.."

"Yeah, now listen..Don't give me the 'she doesn't deserve me' and 'she doesn't like me back' crap.. Y/N was inlove with you since highschool, now you will tell her all about your mushy mushy feelings and you'll two will get married, have kids and you'll have me to thank for. "

"But what about you?"

"Please, I moved on.."

"Really?"

"Hell yeah, with my pretty face?I could find someone in a jiffy!"

The two were laughing when Dustin and Ericka burst into the bathroom.. Annoyance and frustration written all over their face..

"Okay.What the hell?!" Dustin asked very annoyed.

"Dude, we're normal again.."

"That's not the problem now, we need to find Y/N and go with the rest of the party."

"Y/N's not with you?"

"Do you see her?" Erica asked with the normal sass in her voice. Robin rolls her eyes at Erica who just glares at her.

"Where did she go?" Steve ignored Erica's sarcastic question

"She said she'll check the perimeter, but she hasn't come back since." Dustin answered, she was worried for her sister.. In their situation, who wouldn't?

"Shit." Steve and Robin both utter at the same time.

Y/N was changed into a much more inauspicious clothes, it was just some pants and a shirt tucked into it.. She fixed her disheveled hair and wiped her sweat.. She needed to blend in, her eyes wander around the mall.. There were Russians walking around, bviously looking for someone and that someone was them.. All the exits are heavily guarded by guards, there's no way out..

Taking a deep breath she walked back to the theater, praying that her brother and friends was safely still there but before she could even reached the theater, a russian man spotted her..

"I got eyes on one of the target!" The russian said into his earpiece, making Y/N run to the higher level of the mall, her heart racing and she was starting to feel tired.

Y/N just ran until she lost the russian, her breathing was getting shorter by the second.. Y/N's leg was starting to hurt but she ignored it and looked down to see if she can spot her brother..

And there they are, getting chased by guards.. Worries pumped into her brain as they run.. She needed to help them, if not they could get killed.

"Hey stupid spies!I'm right up here, morons!" Y/N screamed at the top of her lungs as she waves her hands around..

Steve and Dustin was horrified as they hide into the counters, Y/N was risking her life for theirs..

The guards that was chasing them made eye contact and targeted Y/N but before they could do anything a car honk.. The russians looked at each other, confused and dazed.. Eleven can be seen controlling the car, she throws it at the bad men and all they could hear were groans..

Y/N felt a surge of relief, she made her way to her brother.. Dustin, Robin, Erica and Steve pop out from behind the counter, steam hissing.. Y/N saw her brother and they all rushed up to hug her..

A tight hug welcomed Y/N, but this hug wasn't just from Dustin.. It was also from Robin, Erica and Steve.. Suddenly they all look up to see the rest of the party.. The hug was cut off by Dustin running to hug Mike and Eleven.

"Lucas?" Erica saw her brother and it made Lucas confuse..

"What are you doing here?"

Y/N who was just taking in deep breaths smiled to herself.. They were safe, but she knew this was not over.. Steve stayed in Y/N side, Robin's word replayed in his mind.. This is his chance to say his undying love to Y/N.

"Y/N?"

"Hmm?" Y/N saw Steve besides her, she was growing tired but Y/N needed to keep thriving for everyone.. Y/N saw that Steve was hesitant, he was nervous and it made her felt nervous too.

"I--I uhh.." Steve mumbles, his tongue was backing out.. Y/N had such a powerful effect on him, to the way she says his name, and everytime Y/N calls him, his heart skips a beat.. It sounds corny, but it was true..

"What?Do you need a speak and spell?" Y/N joked, it didn't help a struggling Steve.. He started to grew more anxious, he needed to get this off his chest.. This could be the last time they all see each other alive, there's no telling what could happen to them.

Y/N was just staring at him

"I have something to confess---"

Steve was cut off by El who was in pain and grunting in the floor.. They all ran to her aid and helped her with the pain she was going through.. Steve slightly curses at himself, maybe this was not a great time for a love confession.. He needed to focus on surviving this hellish adventure.. Again

It finally ended.. Y/N was relieved, it was over.. They were safe, Y/N and Dustin were sitting in the back of an ambulance, a blanket around them as they hug each other..

"If this shit happens again, we're moving.." Y/N jokes.. Dustin chuckled, maybe they should.. However, the adventures were growing more fun and dangerous..

"Nah, we love being heroes.."

Y/N laughs as she held her brother tighter, she fixed his hair and wipe some dirt off his face.. Even if he's old now, he'll always be Y/N's baby brother.. She smiled at the memory of Suzie and Dustin singing in the middle of mayhem and chaos.

"Stooop, I'm all grown up now!" He stood up and made his way to his friends..

"Don't get too far, lover boy!" Y/N shouted causing Dustin's cheek to blush..

Y/N sighs at the sight of her brother walking away from her, this is the last time she'll save the world, she was tired of monsters.. Y/N was just enjoying the cold air of the night when someone cleared their throat.

"Hello to you Harrington.." Y/N smiled at Steve, he was just standing infront of her.. Y/N can't help but feel giddy when Steve's in his sailor outfit.. It saddens her that Steve was still stuck in his highschool mindset..

"I have something to tell you.." Steve mumbles incoherently, but Y/N understood it.. Steve was always nervous when Y/N's around, he remember the first time he saw Y/N..

Steve saw Dustin on the street asking for help, and he didn't believe at him first but he was soon convinced by how Dustin was nervous and scared.. They pulled up at the Henderson's residence, that's where he first saw--no that's not the right word..

That's where he first acknowledged Y/N..

She was sitting on the porch steps on her pajama's, there were dirt on her face and her hairs a mess.. Y/N's face lighten up when he saw Dustin getting out of the car..

"Hey Dus------What is he doing here?" Y/N's face dropped when he saw Steve also getting out of the car.

"He's our back up.." Her brother answered short and continue walking into the entrance of the basement.

"I'm back up..'' Steve said cocky at Y/N, she just scoffs and followed Dustin..

"For a guy with a black eye, you're awfully confident.."

"That's what seeing a pretty girl like you does to me.." Steve didn't know what he ate that time but he had this whole new confidence when he started talking to Y/N.. However, Y/N didn't seem impressed to his corny jokes and pick up lines, she was always scoffing and rolling her eyes..

"Yeah, you said that too when we were inside..That" Y/N's voice pulled him back to the present.. Y/N gestured at the burning mall infront of them.

"Yeah.." Steve cleared his throat, he opens his mouth, but the words won't come out he's chokin', how, everybody's jokin' now, the clocks run out, times up, over, blaow .

"Are you gonna say something?" Y/N was starting to get nervous, did she do something to make Steve act strange? He was shaking, the sweat on his forehead is flowing like the Niagara Falls.. That's not attractive yet for some reason she found it hot..

"Oh--Yeah--Uhh.." He failed to say words again, why can't he just go straight to the point?

Robin who was with the rest of the party was staring at a stuttering and nervous Steve.. The rest started to notice even Jonathan and Nancy who was in each others arms..

"When is he gonna tell my sister that he likes her?" Dustin ponder as he stares at the two..

"I don't know, he's taking forever just uttering one sentence.." Lucas pitched in making the others laugh..

"I thought Steve was a suave and cool guy?" Mike jokes causing some of them to laugh, some was just quiet.. They were still having a hard time grasping all of this, especially Max..

"He's a nerd just like you guys.." Nancy answered, they all shake their heads as they watch Steve nervously fidgets..

"Alright, I finally had enough.." Robin whispers, the party turned to Robin, carefulky watching to what she had under her sleeves..

"HEY Y/N!" Robin shouts..

Y/N broke her gaze with Steve and brought it to a shouting Robin, not far from them.. Steve just froze to his place, panic started blaring out through his mind..

"WHAT STEVE'S TRYING TO SAY IS HE FREAKING LIKES YOU!" Robin shouted, and it all made them freeze.. Y/N blinked rapidly, did she hear that right? Steve l-likes her? What? When? How? Where?

Steve felt embarrased, he wanted the crawl in a hole and die.. Robin was dead to him, how could she do that? Now Y/N's gonna start to avoid him, she obviously doesn't like her back.

"I-Is that true?" Y/N finally asked the question she was dying to ask, she never really thought about Steve that way.. Fine, she's not gonna lie, there were some thoughts about Steve that kept her up at night..

"I can explain--If you don't feel the same it's totally fi----" Steve panicked and randomly said any excuses he can think off, not giving Y/N a chance to speak..

Y/N rolled her eyes at how Steve was rambling on, she smiled and stands up.. Pulling Steve sailor outfit, she kissed him..

Steve pressed his lips harder on Y/N, he wanted this kiss to happen since he first saw her.. And now it's happening, Y/N puts her arm around Steve's neck.. This was her first kiss and she was glad that it was to Steve.. They both kissed as the burning Star Court crumbles infront of them. Y/N didn't knew that you can find love and monsters in this terrifying situation..

Dustin groaned at the sight of her sister and bestfriend kissing, he wanted to vomit and scoop his eyes out.. This was not a sight for sore eyes..

"Ugh!I don't want to watch my sister exchange salivas with Harrington!" Dustin sigh under his breath

"Get used to it, you'll be seeing a lot of him.." Robin teased making Dustin die inside.

"Dammit!"

Y/N was just thinking that some people lost someone special, Eleven lost Hopper.. Max lost Billy and the rest will wake up in the morning with terrible memories haunting them everyday, they can no longer feel the assurance that they're safe in the quiet town they grew up to. They knew everything that lies withing the depths of this ground, all the horrible things that Hawkin Labs brought.. Chief Hopper and Billy Hargrove died for them, they were heroes.. And the sad part is, no one will ever know.. Those who deserves to be recognized is no longer here, the heroine act they did save the world yet the world doesn't even know about them.. But Y/N and the rest knows that the sacrifices they made won't go to waste, they'll do everything in their power to keep whatever haunts this eerie town at bay.

I found this highly nice but cringey at the same time so bear with it, I also wanted to update my series about James Potter but I just can't seem to end it ughhhhh..Anyways, I hope you guys like this one..

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scuttle-buttle · 3 years ago

Text

Chapter 11

WC: 2077

Rated: E

Chapter Tags: full on angst, discussions of emotional trauma, mild depictions of blood/gore, mentions of self h*rm & su*cide, mentions of child abuse, discussions of physical disabilities, institutionalization, some dialogue & plot canon to TV show, hurt/comfort

🧠

The rest of the conference went by much like the first day did. Both you and Laszlo bought a few books for your collections. An ease had settled over your conversations with the help of Sara and John's presence; you spoke more freely with each other. You tell yourself it is not because he's going soft on you or vice versa, but rather that you have found yourself in this imaginary bubble where you happen to get on well. It's inevitable that it will pop once you’re back at school and Laszlo will revert back to his usual callous state.

Laszlo. It still felt odd to think of him like that, rather than by his title. You couldn't lie, it gave you a sort of thrill. Even in your dreams you had only called him by his honorific. Thankfully you didn't have another dream after Friday. You couldn't escape the feeling that you'd said something incriminating in front of the man in question. So you chose to pretend it didn't happen.

Monday morning came and you headed to the train station. Once again he had secured a private cabin for the journey. This time you came prepared with a book since you had yet to replace your broken phone.

"Thank you again for inviting me to this, I really enjoyed myself. It was really nice of the department to foot my travel expenses, the hotel was really fancy. I may have helped myself to a mini-bottle or two," you joked.

"There is no need to worry about the department's finances; they were not involved."

You pause. He paid for you? Laszlo did say he would take care of the arrangements; but the four-star hotel, the private compartment train tickets, the admission to the conference, and every meal? Shit, that must have been a fortune, hundreds of dollars at least.

You don't know what to say, so you settle for an awkward "oh." A moment passes before you add "I appreciate that, um, I can pay you back. Might take some time but I can."

The professor is flippant in his reply. "There is no need, it was well spent for the research and knowledge acquired." He opens his book signaling the conversation is over.

You lick your lips. Fine then, I'll just consider it payment for emotional suffering and damages of the last eight weeks.

The first few hours of the journey were spent reading one of the new books you picked up at the convention. Occasionally you would peek over the pages at the professor. He was engrossed in his own selection; sometimes he would pause to write down a thought.

Around the seventh hour of your journey you had given up on reading anymore in favor of looking at the fields outside. The silence was comforting.

Laszlo had trouble concentrating on the book in his hand. He saw you as a conundrum. One minute you could be sociable and teasing with your comments, then next you were biting at his throat with your quick wit and fierce ideals. He decides that he wants to know what made you into who you are today. Now is as good a time as any.

His eyes on you cause a tingle up your spine but you ignore it. Laszlo breaks the silence; "may I ask a personal question?"

"You just did," you answer, still peering out of the large window. He huffed once, amused. At his following silence you face him. You raise your eyebrows to signal him to go on with his question. Curiosity grows at the thought of what he intends to ask.

"Twice now you have made implications of a traumatic past," he begins.

Bubble popped.

Interrupting, you snark "is this the part where you psychoanalyze me, doc? Because trust me, I've been through enough of that." You pick at the lint on your jeans.

Laszlo tries to choose his words more carefully the next time he speaks. "What I mean to say is, the first afternoon in the classroom where you defended that student you implied you had been witness to a trauma. You then displayed signs of anger and embarrassment before leaving prematurely. Yesterday you mentioned having entered a psychiatric facility. As an alienist I can't help but find myself curious about your experiences."

You slide your eyes to meet his from across the cabin. Your face is devoid of any emotion. "We all have our demons. Even you can't argue with that."

Your jaw clenches. Everyone had warned you. They all said he would try to worm his way into your head to figure you out. All the reviews, the gossip, everything. It was a big fat 'I told you so'. You give a pitiful laugh at the situation. "You know, everyone told me that you would pull this stunt."

He seems confused by your statement. "And what is that?"

"That you'd get inside my head and try to figure me all out or whatever. You already know I googled you beforehand, what everyone says about your methods. By now I assume you've done a little research yourself. I promise you there is nothing exciting here," you scoff and point to yourself.

"You would be correct in your assumption." You chew at your cheek as he starts. "I do know some of what happened in your past. Yet I also know that society likes to dilute the truth into something either more palatable, more entertaining, for people to consume greedily. What I want to know is what you have faced. How you have not allowed the experience to overcome you so much so that your humanity is erased like the characters I lecture on."

Eyes closing of their own volition you are thrown back in time to that night so many years ago. You didn't talk about it anymore. Bitsy knew of course, but that was the extent.

Laszlo waits. He knows this is likely to push you over the edge if your history with him means anything. Quite frankly, anyone would be tossed to their limit at his interrogation had they gone through what you had. John always told him that he needed to work on his bedside manner; that he had a habit of coming on too strong in his pursuit of learning the intricacies of the human mind. But your earlier comment about being sent to a so-called 'nuthouse' rubbed him the wrong way. It left a bad taste in his mouth. He needed to know. He needed to understand.

Laszlo can imagine the reprimand that he would receive from John and Sara for this. Just as he considers apologizing for his intrusion you open your eyes.

"She was fine. None of us suspected anything was wrong. I came home from having dinner with some… boy, and she had locked herself in the bathroom. She- she must have started over the sink and moved to sit on the side of the tub. She was hunched inside it when I got the door open. I pulled her out. Blood was… everywhere." Your voice is clinical as you explain.

"After, I shut down. So I checked myself into a psych ward a few days later when I couldn't get the feel of her blood off my hands. It's slippery, you know. And it smells. You wouldn't think so but it does." You clear your throat. "I did the therapy, took the meds they prescribed, all the standard treatments. Later I started watching true crime documentaries. I'd heard about exposure therapy so I figured the more I saw the gore, the less the image of my dead roommate would bother me. And it did help. The nightmares stopped after a while, I came back to school. I was better, just not the same.” You had watched the passing landscape as you explained. Turning to face him you speak again. “That's why those pictures didn't bother me. They weren't anything I hadn't seen before."

He contemplates you. The discovery and subsequent loss of your friend in this manner would no doubt cause lingering effects to your psyche. A stain that would forever remind you. "I offer my sincerest condolences. I do not presume to know what that would be like to experience, but I am glad you sought help afterwards. To make the choice to alleviate yourself of your own suffering where possible.”

As he says this he realizes that your anger towards the idea of being enslaved to unconscious impulse makes perfect sense. It explains why you focused so much energy on defending your belief in free will. That you have the power to choose how you carry your joy, your anger, your healing. It reminds him of how he held onto his own guilt and hurt, ignoring how it festered within him for so long. He feels as though he needs to share a piece of himself with you.

“I played piano as a child, quite well too. My mother hoped I would someday make a career of it. I vividly remember playing Mozart’s Concerto for Piano No. 20 in D Minor at a holiday party when I was seven years old. It was my favorite to play.... It requires two hands." You finally look at him. "My father...” He pauses to gather himself.

Now it is the doctor that cannot meet your eyes. As you listen you feel your confusion grow. How could he have been a talented pianist if he only had full use of his left hand? Unless..., the realization dawns on you just as he continues, his words slow.

“My father had two sides. One loving and the other brutal, the two often coexisting. It was something as trivial as putting me to bed, I recall... A game of tug of war. We were laughing…” He inhales a sharp breath. Already you can feel the tears begin to blur your vision. “I don't remember if he was drunk or if I said something that offended him. He must have pulled my arm behind my back.” Laszlo exhales shakily. “In small children, fractures can often affect…” he trails off, unable to finish. You can hear how he barely holds himself together.

Your heart aches for the broken man that sits in front of you. He never let on how much his arm bothered him, at least not within your presence. Suddenly you don’t see him as this rude, insufferable, obsessive man, but instead as someone that spends his life trying to protect himself. He projects his own anger and hurt so that he may, just for a minute, forget about his own demons. He wants to help others even when he feels he cannot bear to help himself.

But unlike you, he has to live with the physical reminder of his past every day of his life.

You stand and move to sit on his right side. Before allowing yourself to think too much of your actions, you place your hand atop his own, curling your fingers around his palm and squeezing delicately. You don’t bother wiping away the tears on your cheeks. “I’m so sorry, Laszlo;” the whisper is barely heard above the sound of the train. A second passes where you fear you have overstepped and offended him by touching the affected limb. When his thumb tightens against the backs of your fingers you know he is not. He holds you in place.

“You asked me how I kept my humanity. How does anyone really? We learn to take what we get and we carry it in a bag. Sometimes you have to drag the damn thing behind you. But eventually the weight gets less and less if you allow yourself to move forward, even if it’s still there with you all the time. I dealt with what happened years ago and it does still haunt me. It’s easier now than it was, but… I- I suppose I’ve learned from you too. Sitting in those lectures and hearing you talk. We can either let it haunt us for the rest of our lives… or we can accept it… and use the memory of our pain to help ourselves and others.”

“I’m not sure the choice is entirely in our hands.” His tone is mournful.

You turn to smile at him through your tears. His own eyes are bloodshot. “I disagree. If it weren’t, if we didn’t have the freedom to choose that, we’d all be murderers.”

Tag list

@hardlyinteresting @lorna-d-m @livvyshmiv @somethingthatsaysbubbles @greeneyedblondie44 @unbeatablecurlgirl @apparrio @marchingicenotes7 @anteroom-of-death @bruhidaniel @lemairepstuff @thehuiabird @zemosimp05 @alindeluce @iamnotthecatladynextdoor @laura-naruto-fan1998 @trelaney @boneheadduluc @i-am-dead-inside-666 @fictionlandslanddreams

#the interpretation of dreams #laszlo kreizler x reader #laszlo x reader #laszlo kreizler #the alienist #the alienist angel of darkness #daniel brühl #daniel bruhl #laszlo kreizler fanfic #laszlo kreizler daniel bruhl #scuttle-buttle #tw self harm #tw suicude #tw child abuse

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kaz11283 · 4 years ago

Text

Of Course I'm Here

Characters: Come on you know by now how this goes (Loki x you) (Team x you, platonic)

Warnings: None. And really if you ever see anything that I might need to able as a warning please let me know... I'm the person who forgets there are people out there that get offened by the word F*** if that is an exapmle of anything.

Summary: Mid battle and the avengers keep looking for an answer as to why the God of Lies hasnt showed up yet. Of course you have no idea but at least he proves them all wrong.

ANNOUNCEMENT TIME: hey guys Im back, I know it hasnt been long but I also know I havent been posting every single day like I was, i got into a weird little funk where I didnt want to do anything, I was just feeling completly drained, and I felt bad because I have my little and I didnt even want to play with her because I have just been so TIRED, but I'm feeling better. Work has been kicking my ass here lately and ive been working over 50 hours a week so ive literally been coming in, eatting / feeding the little, getting us ready for bed, and crashing as soon as she falls asleep. But im here now. I will probably be more active on weekends than during the week because I have more time to spend working on stuff but I will be posting also during the week just not daily. At least until after state comes. Thank you so much for the reblogs, likes, comments, follows, and messages please keep them coming! If you would like to be tagged please ask or message, and requests are open. Love you guys so much! 💚💚💚💚💚

Loki Masterlist

~~~~~

"Y/N, BACK UP I NEED BACK UP! EYES IN THE SKY!" Tony yelled from above, you and Clint stood back to back on a roof top shooting as many bad guys as you could. Clint took aim at another carrier, shooting at the engine causing the entire thing to blow up raining debris and hot metal around you.

"Damnit Clint! Farther away make sure they are farther away!" You yelled popping him on the head with an arrow before aiming it at the thing that was chasing Tony.

"Where is lover boy at? You.sent him the location right?" Nat asked into the com.

"Yes I sent him the location, no I dont know where hes at." You mocked.

"Did you send him the right location?" Sam asked.

"One time, one dam-"

"Language!" Steve chimed in causing everyone to groan. Gun shots where ringing all around you and you could here metal on metal paired with Hulk screams coming from another building over.

"Language." You mocked muting your com son that no one but Clint heard you. "I am a 26 year old woman, I think I'm old enough to cuss if I want." You drew back your bow and sent another arrow flying into another goon that had Nat trapped aginst a wall. She shot you a thumbs up before running off. You hit unmute on your com.

"Jesus, 26? Baby, you sure you don't need to be at a babysitter instead of on a building killing things?" He laughed.

"Dont worry Hawk, when we get done here I've already booked you a nice nursing home to be put into." You put your bow around you and stood on the edge of the building. "I need a better view." You looked round, the top of a taller building caught you eye. "There Hawk, we can cover a better radius from up there, get closer to the action."

"DOES ANYONE KNOW WHEN THE GODS ARE GOING TO BE HERE? WE NEED MORE HELP WERE GETTING TIRED AND OUT NUMBERED!" Tony came over the coms screaming.

"How do we get up there? Or do I even wanna know?" Hawk came to examin where you were talking about.

"Im jumping, you cant tell me that someone wont catch me." You shrug.

"GODS WHERE ARE TH- Y/N DONT YOU DARE JUMP!" Tony stopped and hovered right were you was standing.

"Then take us over there. We need higher ground, we cant cover everyone from down here." You crossed your arms.

"Where are the gods at y/n?" He asked again

"I. Dont. Know. Jesus you guys act like I'm suppose to be there keeper!" A simultaneous you are came from everone through the com causing you to roll your eyes. "Hes gonna be here I swear it! Now take me to the building or I jump. 1.....2....-" Tony grabbed you by the collar of your jacket and flew you to the building.

God these things were everywhere and you were starting to run out of arrows. After shooting another ship and causing it to blow you heard what was unmistakably pounding on the roof top door leading to where you currently was at.

"I have some univited guests about to join my party. Anyone available for some assistance?" You yanked out the two emerald green and silver daggars that your boyfriend had given you not long after you had started dating after throwing your bow around you.

"Buy some time kid, I'm on ground level right now but I can try to get up there as fast as possible." Bucky called over the com.

"Buy some time? Ok. I can do this. I work better from afar but a little hand to hand never hurt anyone, just easier to get stabbed this way." The first of the things busted through the door running straight at you. You jerked out of the way missing his staff by just a few inches. Quickly turning you flipped the dagger like Loki had showed you and stabbed him in his side causing him to fall to the ground before the next one tried to impale you.

"I have two daggers and they have freaking staffs! Back up! WHERE THE HELL AR-" you were interupted by static in the air and a bright light. The bitfrost had just opened up leaving to gods standing in front of you and taking out the remainder ofnthe bad guys. "HES HERE! I TOLD YOU GUYS THEY WERE COMING AND THEY'RE HERE." You pulled two extra coms from you pocket and gave them to Thor and Loki.

"Always a pleasure to battle beside you Lady y/n." Thor smiled takkng the com and putting it in his ear before taking off again.

Loki sauntered over to you and put his arm around you waist, you put the com in his ear as he rolled his eyes. He leaned down and gave you a quick kiss.

"You got a new outfit." You smiled at him. God the way he looked in his battle clothe always did something to you, the horned helment was a plus.

"You like it." He smirked down at you pulling you closer.

"Your wearing your horns to." You reached up and brushed a peice if hair behind his ear.

"STOP. STOP NOW. WE CAN HEAR EVERYTHING AND ITS GROSS." Tony yelled causing you both to roll your eyes.

"Quick run down, bad guys everywhere, no end in sight, and I'm out of arrows pretty sure Hawk is too." Loki waved his hand over your quiver making more arrows appear.

"I see you had to use your daggers. I am sorry for not being here. Are you hurt anywhere?" He asked stepping away from you to examin you.

"Small cut on the side, nothing I havent dealt with before, Ill be fine. You go make sure Hawk is fully stocked up and help the others. I got a birds eye view of you right here." I leaned in kissing him one more time before smiling at him and pushing him away. He kissed his two finger before placimg them over his heart and you did the same, "always." You both said before he disappered.

You could hear Thor laughing at the chaos going on and Steve trying to direct the god of thunder on what to do. You had learned earlier to just let him do his own thing and he would be fine. Tony was still trying to micromanage everything when you heard Loki mumble something in an old language and his com cut out. You had figured it wouldnt have stayed on to long though but at least you had tried. It had calmed down up on your end so you decided to finally go back down to where Clint was at shooting an arrow with heavy duty rope you glided back down next to him to watch what was going on.

"Hello, earth to y/n." He snapped his fingers in front of your face. You had been to busy staring at Loki and that damn helmet. "I dont even understand why were friends." He rolled his eyes propping up on the ledge watching as the rest of the team secured the last of the bad guys.

"Because we both shoot arrows, because we are both the best in the team, or because we both know we are the best looking one on the team so we have to stick together." You laughed jumping up so you could sit on the ledge.

"The birds can come out of their nest now." Bucky called over the coms causing you both to sigh.

When you and Clint had reached the bottom you walked over to Thor theowing your arms around the big goof ball.

"You are amazing during battle as always." He beemed patting you on the shoulder.

"As always? Thor youve only fought with her twice." Steve said beside you.

"I had a week off. Went to Asguard, spent time with the boys. Someone had to keep them in line." You shrugged like it was no big deal.

"She was amazing!" Thor went on telling the story of the fight you had all gotten into.

"Mothers been asking about you by the way dear. Wants to know if you've decided to come stay for a while." Loki leaned down and whispered in your ear.

"I think I'm leaning toward a yes. I can't stand being away from you, you had been gone forever this time." You reached for his hand as you both walked to the quinjet.

"I was making arrangements to have our room redone. I figured you would come with me." He gave you a knowing smirk as he reached up to take off his helmet.

"Leave the horns on. I have a suprise for you when we get home." You pulled his hand away from his head and smacked his butt.

"You are a little minx." He laughed chasing you into the jet while the rest of the team groaned and rolled their eyes.

"Even if you wasnt moving i would be kicking your ass out! I am so sick of the PDA between you two." Tony hollared after you.

"Leave them alone Tony, they are courting. Im just glad my brother is happy and not trying to stab me." Thor clapped Tony on the back.

~~~~~

Tag List:

@kgirardin

@sophlubbwriting

@supbeeches

@high-functioning-lokipath

#loki laufeyson #loki odinson #loki #loki avengers #loki daily #loki fanfic #loki fanfiction #loki x reader #loki fluff #loki x y/n #lokilaufeyson #loki one shot #loki (marvel)#loki imagine #loki masterlist #loki and thor

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heresathreebee · 3 years ago

Text

Wearing THAT Part 2

Summary: Reader teases Dewey in a Poison Ivy costume. You finally get to fuck you best friend. Let him show you stars. Previous Masterlist

Tags: 17+ | Undressing, oral sex (female and male receiving), protected sex, light choking and spanking, and hair pulling

AN: damn I took way too long to post this but IT'S FINALLY HERE PLEASE ENJOY

“Big baby,” you hiss.

“What was that?” Dewey sat up on his haunches and his jeans burned as he straddled your bare thighs. You could honestly say you never once imagined this would happen in real life and you’re kinda nervous about the expectations not just for you but for him. Yet every move he makes brings you confidence– you’re both all in now, why not have fun? You were about to fuck your best friend afterall. Speaking of, Dewey brings your attention back to the present when you feel his warm hands slide around your wrists and pin you to the bed below. “What did you say?”

You can’t help but squirm and you feel the gush of new wetness seep out of you. Dominant Dewey was never something directed at you before now. “I called you a baby! What are you gonna do about it?”

He knows you’re egging him on and he’s content to let you. His grip becomes tighter on your wrists to the point of pain and he loosens his grip like a warning. “Maybe I’ll flip you over and spank you, that what you want, you little brat?”

Un-fucking-believeable. You hate being called a brat, fucking loathe the word, but it sounds like the sweetest threat coming from him (maybe because you know he doesn’t actually mean it). You want to say yes, but Dewey climbs off of you to disrobe. White button up whipped to the floor by the lamp, superman t-shirt lost to the carpet by the door. It’s when he starts to undo his belt that you involuntarily whimper.

He hears you and goes a little slower.

"This what you need," he says with certainty. "Fuck, you look good."

His grip on your ankle encourages you as you slowly but surely wriggle and roll from your back to your belly, never breaking eye contact but feeling your whole body tremble. Dewey must see it as he drops his belt to the wayside much to your disappointment. You want to correct him, tell him you're excited, not scared, but you shut your mouth. Maybe it's for the best, you decide, maybe next time.

You yelp and quickly cover your mouth when you feel Dewey's hand come down on your ass. Dewey watches your flesh jiggle with a smirk. You feel heat seer through your body and grab one of his pillows to bite down on. You wiggle your hips encouraging him to do more.

You feel his hands slide up the backs of your thighs and then his teeth give you a nip on your sore cheek. The wetness between your legs grows. Dewey's hand comes down on your other cheek and your eyes roll back into your head. He groans and you hear him finally drop his jeans onto the floor before you feel his warmth meld onto your back.

Dewey plants a tiny kiss behind your ear. "Ned's still awake. We have to be quiet," he whispers regrettably.

"So?" You try to roll your hips and feel what can only be his hardened member. "Patty's out, what's Ned gonna do?"

"Ned will come in here if we're not trying," Dewey replies, "he's done it before, trust me."

You smack your lips to let him know you're annoyed but you are also immediately distracted by Dewey's warmth as it soaks into you. He's like your own personal heating unit, a furnace in human form. You can hardly feel the chill that usually takes over the room and you bet if you stood outside in the true Chicagoan winter in his arms you might not feel a thing.

His tongue is even hotter as he runs it between your shoulder blades. You know he's right– there's no spanking your butt in a way that feels good and is light enough not to make a lot of sound. You two haven't even had sex yet and you're already thinking of next time.

He purrs in your ear, "I'll make it up to you right now."

Dewey nudges your legs apart to sit between them. You want to turn over and watch him but you're committed to this position and the thrill of not really knowing what comes next. He doesn't leave you wanting for long as his hand slides between your belly and the comforter and his hips roll against you, languidly brushing his cock between your moist folds.

Fuck. "Do that again…"

You're not the one in control here, and just to remind you of that, Dewey ignores you. You feel him pull away and his hands circle your hips up so he can slide a pillow underneath and prop you up higher. You spread your legs almost unconsciously and await eagerly for his next move.

"Fuck." His breath ghosts over your backside and it makes you even more of a mess than you already are. "I can't believe it took us so long…"

The feeling of his fingers digging into your cheeks is followed by the feeling of him pulling them, spreading them wider for better access to you. Your body trembles in anticipation and your eyes drift shut as you feel his dexterous tongue circle your entrance. Dewey's moan makes you clench and you have to bite down on the pillow you've kept to your chest to keep quiet.

Dewey's mouth is languid and exploratory as he lavishes your most intimate parts with some much needed and long awaited attention. Your eyes roll back twice when he dips down to lick your clit, then goes back to focusing on your hole. The tip of his nose is another maddening sensation constantly bumping into you unexpectedly. You're used to your partner's noses bumping your clit, not your other hole.

Just when you think you can't take anymore teasing, Dewey pushes two fingers into you down to the knuckle and you whine. They're fucking thick and you definitely saw that beast he's got swinging between his legs so you know this is merely preparation for what's to come next. It forces you to shiver and squeeze the intrusion much to Dewey's delight.

"Dewey…"

Dewey hums against you and your core tightens in response. The scratchy hair on his chin is driving you to the edge faster than you ever thought possible but you want to see him. You twist and contort until you can look and reach behind you. Instead of tangling your fingers in his hair, you pet him. His eyes open lazily, looking at you over the swell of your ass. His fingers and mouth never stop working your body with the same skill he puts into playing his guitar and you can't stop that wave of emotion from crashing over you.

Your fingers curl into his hair and you can barely feel the moan he releases into your pussy because you are completely star bound as you cum.

Your legs twitch as you fall limp to the surface of the bed. Your head is still in the clouds and you barely notice Dewey crawling up your body to lay half next to you half on top to just cuddle with you and let you come back to your feet. You're grateful for the brief respite as you catch your breath and come to.

"Holy fuck." Your voice is muffled by a pillow and it makes Dewey chuckle. You roll over, put a hand on his chest to push him back and resettle face to face, then rest your eyes. "Gimme like five minutes."

"That good huh?" His voice is positively dripping with smugness but you let him have it.

There's nothing like the feeling of his head on your shoulder and his fingers gently grazing the back of your thigh. Dewey's not in a rush to finish, this is your first time together and he wants it to be good– he needs it to be good. Because he likes you.

You catch your breath and sit up, forcing Dewey to roll off of you. He gets a good look at your front now that you've sat up and he drinks it all in, eyes never lingering in one place too long. That pride goes straight to your head and you lean over him mischievously.

"This ain't everything you got, is it Rockstar?," you tease, "gonna show me what else you got, right?"

Dewey's eyes quickly turn dark again and his hands slide up your thighs to your hips. One hand grips the back of your neck and pulls you down into a deep kiss, your nipples tingling as they brush the hair on his chest. You don't expect him to flip you over and can't stop the AAAAUUGH that escapes your mouth.

You land right under the headboard not three inches from the night stand. Dewey towers over you, hips keeping your legs apart but it's not enough so Dewey presses his palms down on the inside of your knees to open you up even more, as far as you'll go. His tongue swipes over his bottom lip and you're briefly worried he's going to eat you out again– you want his cock.

The bobbing, red thing that's been leaking precum since you sat in his lap at the party. He must have noticed your line of sight as his hips jut forward just a little bit, inviting you to touch him. You make him look at you as you reach for it, feeling the smooth velvet skin wrapped over an iron rod. It's imperfect in that good way. Curves a little to his left at the end and he keeps his bush trimmed. You give his cock a squeeze at the base with every stroke and watch his eyes roll back into his head.

Dewey swallows roughly and shakes his head as if staving off a fog. He flicks your hand from his cock and leans down to kiss you again. You allow his tongue entrance without hesitation and run your fingers through his hair, just basking in his attention despite the throbbing need in your core.

You definitely hear somebody open the door over Dewey's sweet moan, but it's forgotten as soon as the door closes and the grumble that follows is muffled on the other side. It sounded suspiciously like finally.

You hum and break the kiss to breathe, "want your cock in my mouth."

Dewey is already shaking his head but you're adamant. "Just for a second, please? It'll only be a second."

"You're bold in assuming I'm going to last a second on that wicked tongue of yours."

You chuckle, but you lean back anyway and lick your bottom lip expectantly. Dewey rolls his eyes playfully, but he can't hide that he wants to see– even if only for a second– just how far you can take him. And he is in for a surprise.

"This is such a bad idea," he says, crawling up your body. "Stupid idea. Terrible…"

When his hips are high on your shoulders you open your mouth wide, tongue out just to tease him. You are rewarded with a deep, deep groan. Dewey's already thinking about how he's never going to recover from this.

With his hand wrapped around the base of his cock, he presses the leaking tip to your tongue.

Instantly you give him a firm lick and feel his whole body shiver. The frenulum of his cock slides along the tip of your tongue deeper into your awaiting mouth. You wrap your lips around it and suck. The noise it pulls out of Dewey makes your nipples ache.

"Fuck…"

You relax your throat and take more of him and half way down his shaft you feel the hair of his balls tickle your chin. The man has to grab the headboard to keep himself upright, eyes rolling back into his head as he tries not to cum then and there. Before you can do anything more, his hips pull back, hand pressed to your forehead and he slides out of your mouth with a wet pop.

"No more, no more," he begs. He looks delirious for half a moment before he gathers his wits and climbs off the bed. He digs around in his nightstand for condoms, flashing six foil packets and asking with far more sense than he has in the past few minutes, "what color?"

"Green."

Dewey tosses the others on the nightstand and rolls the green one on at your request. He mumbles something under his breath and you kick him in his pert little ass. "What was that?"

"I said you would pick green."

"Well I gotta remind you how good I look in it, don't I?"

Dewey returns to the bed, towering over you from between your legs and ratcheting them up higher, bending you almost in half to glower almost menacingly. "The next time I catch you wearing tights, I'm going to fuck you through them."

You hum and buck your hips in invitation. "promises, promises…"

He kisses you as he finally, finally slides inside of your wet, tight heat. He tries, tries, tries to take it slow but once he's got the head in, he snaps his hips the rest of the way home, needing to be engulfed in you now. Your pussy feels even better on his cock than his fingers and you felt fucking amazing on his fingers.

"Babe…"

You dig your fingers in his hair and pull hard. "Fuck me, Dewey. I want bruises."

Your command is his to obey. It's not long before his deep, testing thrusts become a brutal pounding, one where he has to grip the headboard with white knuckles and hold you down with the other hand on your stomach. You take it– all of it– with dirty moans and thrashing. He's hitting something deep inside you that nobody has ever hit before and it's fucking unravelling you at the seems.

"So good…" his mumbling voice finally rises enough that you can make sense of his words over the wet slap of skin on skin. You're both coated in sweat and drunk on each other's bodies. Your eyes drifted shut at some point trying to not get overwhelmed by the many sensations but they fly open when you feel fingers around your neck.

Dewey's looking down at you and you've never felt hotter. His hand squeezes– for nothing more than a single second– and he watches you, still pounding away at your pussy.

You lean your head back, a silent offering. The next breath you take is deep and you are given no choice but to hold it as Dewey finally finally clamps his hand around your throat like a vice. Your mouth opens subconsciously but you cannot gasp. No air goes in or out of your lungs, there is only a burn beginning in your chest and a dizziness in your head.

Your eyes roll back and you break the instant Dewey let's slip a very unconscious and in the moment "fucking love you."

Stars burst behind your widened eyes and a gush of wet seeps in from somewhere in your body and pushes Dewey's cock out. He let's your throat go and has to cover your mouth at the volume of your moan.

The man laughs at the spectical and pushes back inside your heat, fucking your through your second orgasm and delighting in being covered in way more liquid than either of you expected.

His pace changes, long deep strokes meant for him and his pleasure. How he can still fuck you at this pace will leave you wondering for months after this, but he does and he does it so well. You wrap your arms around his shoulders and pull him down flush against your skin.

The change in angle brushes your clit and causes tiny sparks in you and you tighten around Dewey with a purr. He meets your purr with a growl, burying his face in your chest and continuing to pump into you. He's close, you can feel it in the frantic change in his rhythm. Dewey keeps time like a fucking metronome but he's lost in the feeling of your skin, your smell, your embrace.

Your legs wrap around his hips and you run your tongue over his ear before you whisper, "I love you too, Dewey."

Dewey's entire body freezes. His cock throbs with the beat of his heart as he fills the green condom and presses his hips into yours as hard as he can. He can't breathe until his orgasm recedes, and by then you're coming again too just from the excitement of it all. He can barely hear the whimper he releases into the hollow of your throat as your pussy milks him for all he's worth.

You're both shaking for several minutes in the afterglow, holding each other and catching your collective breaths. You barely remember cleaning up and changing the sheets. You do remember sharing starry eyed glances and giggles with Dewey just before finally falling into bed and curling into each other.

"Ok," you say, "I know I said we don't have to label it but…"

Dewey drags his knuckles against your spine. "Yeah… if you had to pick a name… what would you call it?"

You hum and draw stars on his chest. "How about… for the rest of my life?"

Dewey smiles till his cheeks hurt. "I could get behind that."

Morning comes with a flourish of sounds. Dewey's snoring, birds chirping, Patty knocking.

Oh god Patty's knocking…

You bury your face in Dewey's neck and groan. There's no way she remembers your promise… right? She's knocking a lot, maybe she's just mad with a huge hangover. "Dewey! Where's my girl? Dewey!"

"She's in here!" Your head shot up and you looked at Dewey with a face belying utter betrayal. Dewey simply looked at you with no remorse, like a cat who pushed your glass of wine from the table. "Ready to go for a run babe? You're good right? Do your legs work?"

"You motherfuck–"

But then Patty was opening the door with a confused face and you had to scramble to cover your nudity. "What? You're sleeping in the same bed now?"

"Uh…" you're at a loss for words between the two of them.

"Doesn't matter, get dressed! You can borrow my clothes or Dewey's, shower later! Let's go!"

As soon as Patty's gone from the door, you turn on Dewey. The man throws a hand up in defense but instead of catching your hands, you kiss him. You hold his heart in your hands and kiss him deep and long. When you finally pull back, he's breathless and ready for a second round.

And that's when you tell him, "when I get back, I'm gonna smash your guitar into tiny little pieces and stab you with them."

You left him alone to panic for the hour you were gone (he spent it hiding his equipment from you).

The End

@fundamentally-lazy @werwulfy @hoodoo12 @escape-your-grape @go-commander-kim @imma-fucking-nerd

#three bees writing #dewey finn #🐝🐝🐝✒#Dewey Finn x female reader #smut #🖤❤💛#black reader insert

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maplecornia · 3 years ago

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chapter 26

𝔴𝔬𝔯𝔡 𝔠𝔬𝔲𝔫𝔱: 1.85K

𝔰𝔲𝔪𝔪𝔞𝔯𝔶: You watched them from the sidelines ever since you were a young teenage girl. Now you’re grown up, they’ve returned after 2 long years and everything has changed. What happens when you pull back the mask and find the darkness within? What happens when you see that they’re broken?

𝔞/𝔫: i don't think i'll ever get over how hot Namjoon is ;-;

You groan as you lean against the pillar near the entrance to the BigHit building.

Last night, when Taehyung walked you back to your apartment, you didn't sleep very well. Turning to glare at your rather disheveled reflection in the mirror, you let out another groan.

Why did he have to show up? You were perfectly fine, things were perfectly normal, and then he had to screw up your heart all over again. Letting out a small scream, you throw a 3-second fit before leaning your back against the clear glass wall.

Sooner or later, you're going to have to go in.

Why can't it be later?

Letting out a guttural growl, you pull yourself off of the glass and head inside the building, stomping like a little two-year-old. You really don't want to see him today, you're afraid of what will happen if you do.

You don't want to fall.

Please God, don't let me fall.

Entering the building, you feel a bit more comfortable, not so out of place. Now, you have a purpose, a plan; a reason for being here. Smiling softly to yourself, you walk forward, this time nothing in your way. As you reach the receptionist's desk, you smile as you recognize Jojo behind it.

Playing coy, you knock twice on the desk before glancing away and holding your head in your hands. She glances up, ready to greet the newcomer but as soon as she sees your face, she breaks into a grin.

"Ah~ it's the snoozer, early today I see." You frown at the nickname but when she smirks your way, you can't help but grin like a giddy child. It feels good to have friends or at least the beginning relationships of one.

"I told you, the time was wrong." You pout, flopping on the desk and she laughs before preparing the schedule you need for Namjoon today.

"Mmhmm, and what happened yesterday? Was Mr. Kim too tired of waiting and told you to stay at home?" The mention of yesterday causes your grin to fade a little. With it comes the memory of Taehyung, and he starts to reenter your mind. Pulling yourself off the desk, you smile weakly, shaking your head.

"No, I had an injury, Namjoon wouldn't let me come in." She blinks a bit in surprise at the informal way you address him.

"'Namjoon?' Huh, I didn't think the two of you were that close. You only met once after all." She mumbles before typing something into her computer. Realizing your mistake you let out a small gasp.

"Oh, I'm sorry. He told me to call him without honorifics, I suppose it slipped my mind." You look away from her, a bit embarrassed, but as soon as she presses the print button, she chuckles.

"Don't worry, Yen. I was just joking." When you don't look at her, she sighs a bit before lightly knocking on your head. Surprised, you rub your forehead and pout as you meet her gaze once more. Smiling, she pays no mind, presenting you with an ID badge. Your eyes widen as you see it, and you take it from her waiting fingertips.

"Is this mine? I didn't think they'd process it so fast."

"Of course it's yours, whose else would it be?" Jojo chuckles, leaning over the counter and pointing to your name. "See? Lin Yen."

You bite your bottom lip, trying to suppress your grin. Somehow, this makes things all the more real, you can't help your delight at the sight. Jojo catches sight of the cute expression and can't help but laugh as she pulls away.

"Now hurry up, the schedule is all ready for the day. Don't forget to check in with the head manager, you remember his name right?" She reminds you, making you pause for a moment before you run off.

"Of course, it's Kim Sejin. Everyone knows that." She smiles at the coy response and waves you away.

"Okay, hurry up and go then. I'm sure Mr. Kim is waiting for you." You bow to her before taking off, a small bounce to your footsteps.

Walking through the halls without Namjoon is a bit scary, but exciting at the same time. You can't help but love the butterflies coursing through your stomach, and is it weird that you kind of want to barf and dance at the same time? Everything is so exciting and new, it's as though the world has been painted a different color.

You try your hardest to forget everything, just live in the moment as of right now. No more worries about the past. About your friends. About your mom. About Taehyung. Right now, you need to focus on yourself.

And this job seems like the perfect escape for that.

Humming slightly to yourself you do a little twirl in the hallway before turning the corner...

...and bumping right into Kim Namjoon.

You let out a small shriek, stumbling back, your body shrinking into a small protective ball like it normally does. It's a little defense mechanism you've acquired over the years. Your eyes closing themselves tightly, you don't realize who you've bumped into until he takes you by the shoulders and catches you mid-air.

Blinking as he rights you, you look up and find yourself face to face with your boss.

"Are you okay?" he asks, his voice coated with worry, and you chuckle a bit nodding sheepishly.

"Yes, I'm sorry I should've been paying attention to where I was going." You reply, stepping back from him. Though he sighs in relief as he releases you, you find that there’s a heavy cloud hanging over his head. He’s not fully there with you, lost in some unforgotten thought. Furrowing your brow in confusion, you wonder what happened to make him look that way. You open your mouth to ask him about it, but he's already speaking, and your words fall on deaf ears.

"It's a good thing that I bumped into you." You tilt your head in expectation, curious to what he's about to say next. "I needed to talk to you."

"But your schedule isn't ready yet--"

"That can wait."

You open your mouth to protest, but he's already taken you by the hand and is dragging you down the hallways.

Even though you cry out incomprehensible questions and sounds of alarm behind him, he can't seem to hear you. He doesn't want to hear you. His mind is too cluttered with the events of yesterday.

The outlandish plan that BangPD has in store for you.

"Why her?" He asks, his hands clenching tightly at his sides.

After the meeting, BangPD requested to meet privately with Namjoon, after all, he was the leader and one of the people that Sihyuk trusts the most. It didn't matter to RM anyway, he needed to talk to Sihyuk as well, and if it had to be on his terms then so be it.

Bang Sihyuk glances outside at the setting sun, casting shadows throughout his office. Serene and insoluble, shadows meant to conceal that which he would rather keep inside. He sighs before answering, his hands secured behind his back as he stands before the massive glass window.

"You know, BTS wouldn't have existed without you. If I had never come across you that day, if I had never been inspired to create a group that will strengthen and invigorate your music, we would have never gotten here." Namjoon glances at him in frustration. He hates when people beat around the bush, but his respect and humility won't allow him to speak out against his senior.

"It's the same with her."

Bang Sihyuk reaches out and taps on the window before letting out a soft chuckle.

"Did you know that glass is so easily broken? That is, when it's on its own. But when you fortify it, when you strengthen it with multiple pieces, then it becomes indestructible." Turning around to face Namjoon, he smiles.

"Almost Bulletproof."

Biting his bottom lip, Namjoon remains silent as he watches BangPD walk to his desk and sit down. He raises his brow when Namjoon remains standing, but when it's clear that he has no intention to make himself at home, he merely sighs.

"She auditioned before, you know. For the BE:LIFT project, for Source Music, she even auditioned for Plus Global." Namjoon balks at that. This is new information to him. He knew that it was her dream to be a singer, but never did he know that she wanted to be an idol. Especially since she's a foreigner, that would be near to impossible. "I didn't accept her."

"Why?"

"I didn't want to share her."

At the explanation, Namjoon turns away, running his hand across his face in frustration. This is much more complicated than he thought. Somehow, she's been connected to the company for the longest time. Not just through Jaejin, not through him himself, not even through Jungkook or Taehyung. Before any of them had a chance to see her potential, she's been on the mind of their former CEO since she auditioned 5 years ago. For a program, she would never be able to succeed in.

"I have been planning this for a while, Namjoon."

He's unwilling to accept it, he can't accept it.

"She's the missing piece."

At the thought, his hand clenches subconsciously around yours.

He can't stand the thought of you disappearing far from his reach.

And yet, almost against his will, he finds himself bringing you to the very fate that will keep you from him.

Perhaps forever.

He pauses when the door comes into his line of vision. Almost as though he were afraid of what lies behind that very same door. Mrs. Kwon looks up from her desk as the two of you enter the small lobby, and presses a button on her phone before muttering incomprehensible words to a person on the other line.

Out of breath, you place your hand on your chest before looking up at him. At the sight of his set jaw, and stony eyes, you can't help but feel a bit worried.

What exactly happened to make him look that way?

Once more, you open your mouth to speak to him, but Mrs. Kwon interrupts and you look at her in surprise, not noticing she was there.

"You may go in."

Confused, you turn to Namjoon, but all he does is give a nod to the secretary before stepping towards a massive oak door. Curious, you peer around him to glance at it, not quite aware of your surroundings. There's a small plaque on the door, one that reads the name of the person residing within in perfect neat letters.

방시혁

Bang Sihyuk.

Your heart stopping in your chest, you freeze halfway to the door, your hand slipping out of Namjoon's.

"Namjoon, why are we here?" you try to keep the fear, the anxiety, the worry out of your voice, but the efforts are futile. He swallows hard, steadying himself before turning to you, his warm eyes soft and apologetic.

"He wanted to meet you."

𝔫𝔬𝔱𝔢: you can probably guess what will happen next, but nonetheless i'm exciiiited

chapter 27 here

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letterstothemidnightsociety · 4 years ago

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Alright, so if you've been following along with me, Supernatural season 3 starts out on a trio of episodes that are Really Fun, slides into some episodes that are Pretty OK, then takes a real nose dive into Bummersville. Hoo boy guys, I really hope that this season picks up. I mean, it won’t, but I can still dream. 2021 was maybe not the year to start watching this season. Fair warning.

The next three episodes for this season are just, like, real downers. First we get “Fresh Blood,” which, aside from the terrible title, starts out on a high note. Gordon (gross) somehow manages to catch up with Bela (HOW??) and threatens her if she doesn’t hand over the Winchesters. Bela, in all of her class and grace, won’t give them up because she has a high price point and Gordon is really lowballing her here. Just like, yes, ok, please stay forever, you’re amazing and I love you. And what a scene this is! You have two characters, one with a strict moral code (albeit one that allows for violence and winning at all costs) and the other with almost NO moral code, but an allegiance that can be bought with the best price and it’s such a fun back and forth until Gordon pulls out a gun. And then she pulls out her phone and just has Dean on speed dial and that’s maybe my fav part. Bela has run into the Winchesters twice and they maybe legit hate her but she’s very much like, oh yeah, my BFF’s the Winchesters, I love those idiots!

I love that we come back to this moment later in the episode when Bela, like, three days later, is like, Oh! I guess I should warn the Winchesters that some crazy guy is after them! She’s just so casual about it you kind of get the feeling that, even though technically Gordon was threatening her life, she doesn’t view him as A Threat. She gives the Winchesters a heads up just to be like oh yeah, you might want to watch out for this mild inconvenience, and she seems legit shocked when Dean freaks out. There’s this moment that plays across her face like, oh shit, did I...did I fuck up? And it adds a nice bit of depth to her character. She’s seems honestly worried, both for the lives of the Winchesters but also that Dean won’t like her anymore and that is just a charming bit of A C T I N G!

I am gonna miss her SO MUCH when she dies at the end of this season. WHY did we CANCEL HER???

But despite the fun beginning, this episode is about monsters and how people become monsters and how other people are probably the reason. Because our main baddie is a vampire who hunts to...well, listen if we look at the facts that he lays out in his monologue, it’s a little more tragic - he’s trying to replace the daughters that he lost hundreds of years ago, cool motive, still murder. In practice though, he goes around turning hot blonde coeds into vampires and then ?????? Who knows. I’d like to believe that this was a problem with the CW executives or maybe casting/directing and not with the writing, but it’s SPN and you really can’t be sure with anything. The fact is, this is a CW show from the early 2000’s and a lot of their extras are cast to type. And that’s maybe me exhibiting some girl-on-girl crime, but there are other episodes that did a much less blatantly gross job casting their extras/Very Special Guest Stars.

Anyway, the POINT of this guy is that he’s a monster because someone killed his daughter and he’s just been trying to fill that grief hole inside of him for centuries. This is not unlike Gordon, who ALSO has been trying to fill a grief hole that he’s had for decades, except he’s not killing people and resurrecting them as blood suckers, he’s just killing them. And then, when the Vamp decides to turn Gordon it’s a real sweet moment of comeuppance for like, a HOT second and then you’re like, awww dude, ya done f’ed up. That was a bad idea. You’ve made a HUGE mistake.

More importantly, our Vampire In Question finally runs into the Winchesters and get’s to say things like “I was desperate! You ever felt desperate? I've lost everyone I ever loved. I'm staring down eternity alone. Can you think of a worse hell?” and also “I just ... I didn't care anymore. Do you know what it's like when you just don't give a damn? It's like ... it's like being dead already.” and Dean’s v. much like, THIS IS TOO REAL ROY.

Sam may ALSO be feeling Too Real feelings because he is DONE dicking around with Gordon and honestly yes, I like this, this is good Sam development. It’s nice to know that Sam has a breaking point. And I admit I’m of two minds about this moment because 1) I love the idea of Dark!Sam this season and that maybe Sam’s decision to actually kill Gordon is just one step in that process but 2) I ALSO love the idea of Sam Lite finally having a breaking point and Gordon is IT. I don’t know which theory I like more in this scenario, but they are both good theories.

I think as much as this episode wants to draw parallels between the monsters and Dean (thank you artful editors), you can’t look at the “I’ve lost everyone I ever loved,” line and not think of Sam? Cuz he’s got one (1) person left in his life that hasn’t died horribly, so how desperate is he about to get through the end of this season? I’ve definitely been watching this season with eyes on all the ominous Dean foreshadowing, but the Sam foreshadowing is also there, just buried under the heavy weight of a thousand smulders and suicidal levels of denial.

And also, FUCK the tag on this episode! Guys, it is CUTE but it is also HORRIBLE. Dean starts teaching Sam how to fix the Impala and at first it’s all, “Oh! Adorable Brothers Being Brothers!” and I loved it but then I almost immediately hated it because you realize this is about making sure Sam can get along without him once he’s gone and Dean just accepts his own death with such casual ease that it’s just...INFURIATING!

This scene was rude and I HATE IT!

Cut to - “A Very Supernatural Christmas” Special!

Guys, I was so excited when I got to this episode. THIS is Classic Supernatural Shenanigans. Plus, you know a Holiday Special is the ultimate sign that this show has Made It, right? Or it could be a sign that they’re selling out, who knows, but I think we can say that at this point in the series, SPN is established enough to start having fun with their fans. That’s what this says to me. BUT THEN what we get is like...oh boy.

First - like, I’mma beat this horse to death, but what is WRONG with this FAMILY? John Winchester very quickly devolved into the sort of father that forgot about every single holiday and did not ever, even a little bit, make up for it. It’s not a surprise, but it kind of wrecked me seeing a flashback where Baby Dean is just so attached to a father who can’t be bothered to actually care for his children. I know he’s not in this episode because Jeffrey Dean Morgan was tied up in other projects, but the fact that John doesn’t show up at the end to button the flashbacks with a But then he DID show up for Christmas! just makes this plot line that more gutting. And despite Dean’s hero worship of their father, this is maybe the Christmas where Baby Sam stops believing in his own father. The only bright side to this is that it continues to enforce the fact that Bobby should have sued John for custody. Bobby should maybe STILL Sue for custody so that Dean at least would feel like someone wants him for once in his life, damnit.

And then we wrap this episode up with the Best Worst Christmas of all, because we see Sam start to...also?? accept that Dean is about to die? Cuz that’s what this episode is really about - Dean’s Last Christmas. And everything about that makes me ~ u p s e t ~.

So Sam decides to put his curmudgeonly grinchy attitude aside in order to make it a special day for Dean and ugh. UGH. UGHGHGHG. Season three is the worst guys, and I can’t believe I didn’t realize that until right this second now.

So let’s wrap this up with "Malleus Maleficarum", honestly an episode that is mostly forgettable until we get to, like, the last five minutes. Sure, witches and curses and selling your soul, woohoo whatever.

But then we get some real Ruby centric reveals and like, WHAT is happening?? First off, the scene where Ruby and Tammy have a moment is a real Moment. There is some baggage and tension here and it is heavy. And then Tammy drops the mic when she reveals that Ruby used to be human.

THEN, Ruby legit saves their asses by killing Tammy with a fancy magic knife. Ok, Dean does the actual killing, but Ruby brought the fancy magic knife. So between the hot and heavy tension with “Tammy” and her repeated attempts to keep the Winchesters alive, we’re left wondering what IS Ruby’s deal? I personally wonder how much of the show’s mythology the show actually has figured out at this point? Because interviews with Kripke definitely walk the line between “Oh we definitely have this whole thing worked out,” and “yeah, we’re sort of finding things as we go along,” which is maybe why it’s able to last as long as it does. More on that later.

Of course the big kicker is the final scene between Ruby and Dean. Dean is almost on board with Ruby at this point in the season, and much like his scene with the demon in “Sin City”, they share a kind of vulnerable moment together where Ruby admits that, yeah, she was human once and yeah, Hell will destroy you, body and soul, and yeah Dean’s worst fear will probably come true - he will become the thing he hunts, no ifs, ands or buts about it. And Dean knows that Ruby knows that Dean knows that there’s no way to save Dean from his fate, but they both agree that they can’t take Sam’s last ounce of hope away from him because, for both of them, Sam is their hope. Ruby and Dean both see the war happening around them and they know that with Dean gone, Sam’s maybe the last guy holding back the tide to save all humanity.

Which, honestly? Bull shit. Do you know how many hunters are out there? Neither do I, but this season seems to indicate that there are a LOT. We have barely scratched the surface on the hunter community and it’s a damn shame that they are all weirdo loners because there is a war going on. You know what works great in a war? An ARMY. Buncha mentally unstable, martyr-complex ijits who can’t put their differences aside for one damn MINUTE so that maybe, JUST maybe, the could actually defeat the evil they’ve spent their entire lives dedicated to fighting. And if Ruby and Dean wanted to help Sam, what they should probably do is get him plugged in to that community. I do believe that of all they backasswards, self-obsessed, painfully anti-social crazies out there, the Winchesters are THE WORST.

Listen tho, this was like, a solid scene between these two. Just a lot of work goin' into this and it paid off.

Anyway, back to the mythology for a hot second - This sort of loosey-goosey stumbling into your own world building is probably another one of those things that you’ll only really get in a show with this many episodes per season? It’s that room to play and experiment and just make stuff up as you go along. I think the slow drip method of releasing episodes ALSO helps in this scenario because you’re able to see what fans are reacting to in almost-real time. When viewers are binging episodes, I think you're less likely to see what specifically they’re reacting to and more wholistically they’re reacting to. And that’s not to say you won’t see those specific things that they like/love eventually, but by the time you get there, your season’s been produced in its entirety and you’ll have to bear that in mind for (hopefully) next season. But with SPN, they were writing and producing the show at the same time that some of the episodes were airing. That’s why they were able to make decisions on the fly, based on what fans responded to. And definitely by this point in the show, there was a sizeable and vocal fan base that made their feelings VERY well-known. We’re only in season three, but they’ve already had a number of con appearances and a pretty active online presence. That kind of feedback has got to be helpful, from a writing perspective, but it also allows for things like characters getting cut because nobody liked them for some dumb reason. BUT, if you’re fighting to stay on the air for 100 episodes or longer, responding to fan reactions is what’s gonna do it and that’s a fact.

#Supernatural #Supernatural rewatch #SPN #Sam Winchester #Dean Winchester #Bela Talbot #Gordon Walker #Ruby #SPN Season 3 #Fresh Blood #A Very Supernatural Christmas #malleus maleficarum #It's gonna lighten up on the next three episodes #I promise #I hope #Don't watch this season if you're still feeling 2020 #Is my personal opinion

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dreams-of-wings · 5 years ago

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Impossible (6/8)

Imagine Billy Hargrove with a Mixed Race/Biracial S/O

Warnings: Racism, swearing, homophobia, homophobic slurs, mild violence, you throw hands a lot, angst.

Masterlist

You stay blocking the window sill for a bit cuz you enjoy seeing him squirm.

Honestly, he is bad at this whole climbing thing and he's struggling to not fall on his ass.

You finally let him in after he almost falls.

You're laughing your ass off while he's climbing through your window and simultaneously having a heart attack.

"It would have been less of a hassle if you used the door."

"I didn't think your parents would be happy if someome like me came knocking on their door asking for you."

You raise a brow at this, someone like him?

After a minute it occurs to you.

"Oh you mean a violent, racist, douchbag, with a reputation that surpasses the devil?"

He frowns.

Contrary to popular belief, Billy Hargrove is very self aware, and very self conscious about himself, his actions, and his self worth.

He doesn't like being an asshole but it's all he knows.

He low-key is afraid of growing up to be like his father.

Even though he has that nagging voice in the back of his mind that's telling him he's already as bad as his dad, if not worse.

He hides it all under a mask of confidence, booze, and cigarettes.

It still doesn't make his actions okay.

You snap him out of his thoughts.

"What?"

"I said my parents are out of town."

Now that he's in your room you noticed that Billy looked shaken up.

Billy Fucking Hargove, for once didn't have a scratch on him, but he looked like hell.

You question him.

It takes a while but he finally answers.

His dad got pissed at him because Max wasn't home, and he came hoping she would be here so he could drag her home.

You convince him to let you come along, because he is pissed and you know how he can get.

He caves and lets you tag along.

The next stop was Lucas' House.

Neither Max nore her son were there, but she said the kids all loved to go to Mike's house to play games.

Next stop is the Wheelers residence.

You dont know what's being said between Mrs. Wheeler and Billy, but knowing Billy and being able to read his body language- well. It takes everything in you to refrain from rolling your eyes and honking his horn (though you fail at not rolling your eyes).

I mean come on you guys are looking for Max, this is not the time to be flirting.

Fuck he went in.

You audibly groan and contemplate jacking his car to go look for his sister yourself, unfortunately he has the keys and you dont know how to hotwire a car.

Finally, he's out.

You forgive him because he comes out with a cookie in his mouth and has another one in his hand, which he gives to you.

"Hell, yes!!"

What?

Who the hell turns down food? And cookies at that. Home made cookies. And they're fresh.

Last stop was the the Byers house.

Fuck, Steve is there.

"Stay in the car."

"What? No!" Like hell you were going to let him beat up your friend.

"Stay in the fucking car!"

Steve seems both angry and hurt when he notices that you're in Billy's car.

You can't really hear what's being said, it's all muffled.

You panic a bit when Billy shoved Steve and you worry they'll start fighting.

"Shit!"

You burst out the car when you see Billy storming for the door, but stop to help Steve.

"Why the hell are you driving around with him?"

"He came to my place first, looking for Max and I offered to help him. What'd you say to piss him off?"

Steve gets mad, thinking your taking his side, and for the second time that night you find yourself rolling your eyes. "Why did you tell him you didn't know her? I tutor Max and her friends, and you babysit her friends, and you and I hang out, of course you would know her?"

You both stop arguing when you here a loud crash from inside the house.

"Damn it!" "Shit!"

You both walk in just in time to hear Billy threaten Lucas.

Fucking excuse you, Billy???

Steve decks him across the face, Billy taunts him, and this time an actual fight breaks out.

You try your best to get them both to stop fighting, but neither of them will listen to you, the voice of reason.

When Billy has Steve pinned to the floor and keeps punching him over and over again you finally get physical.

You tackle Billy off him while he's oblivious to his surroundings and use your hands and knees to pin his arms to the ground.

"What the fuck is your problem, Billy?!"

You've never seen him look at you so angrily, probably because he feels a bit betrayed.

He somehow manages to roll you both over so now your stuck underneath him.

You flinch when he draws his fist back like he's going to hit you, but the next thing you know- there's a syringe sticking out the side of his neck.

"Holy shit!"

He gets up to go after Max, but promptly falls.

Your a bit shocked by Max's outburst.

Now her, you have never seen that angry before.

When they leave, you stay behind to look after Billy and move him to couch

He isn't happy when he wakes up.

He's actually really fucking pissed.

But he's still a little groggy from sleep and the drug (mostly the drug) so it's funny.

Help this child, he thought he was getting off the couch normally, but turns out he just rolled off and onto the floor face first.

Your freaking out and laughing all at once.

Slurred, "What the fuck's so funny?!?"

He needs aspirin and water like a hangover.

He falls asleep again after you get him back onto the couch, and you fall asleep on the floor propped up against the couch in a sitting position.

You don't wake up till the kids get back (Max wakes you up).

The both of you manage to get Billy to his car. He still asleep like a log.

You go to your place, and they spend the night - Max was worried their dad would be even more angry if they woke him up, and even more so if he caught you helping Billy and Max into the house.

The next morning was very #Domestic.

With You waking up to find Max already up and looking through your cabinets for food.

Suprise, you end up making breakfast for everyone!

Max wanted chocolate chip pancakes, so chocolate chip pancakes she shall get.

No suprise, Billy wakes up while you both are making the sausages and bacon.

Full plate of eggs, bacon and sausage, and pancakes for everyone! Yay! 😀

Honestly the best morning the two of them have had for a while, but you won't catch either of them saying that outloud.

Max leaves to hang out with the others.

Billy still seems mad about the previous night.

"What, are you going to pout all morning? All day?"

"I dont pout."

"Oh I'm sorry, what would you prefer to call it- sulking? Brooding? Plotting my death?"

He tries to hide a snicker and lightly shoves you.

Going back to school the following Monday felt weird after everything that happened over the weekend.

You tried asking Steve what was up with all the drawings in Will's house, but he wouldn't budge.

Of course you tried asking Nancy and Jonathan too, but they acted like they didn't know anything.

The next few weeks were full of practice tests and prep assignments for finals.

You saw Billy less and less because you were hitting the books.

Sure he knew you were probably in the library, but after that weekend he wasn't sure how to go about interacting with you, or if he should do so anymore at all.

He kinda feels like you picked Steve over him.

He pops buy on Wednesday and almost gives you a heart attack. He's not surprised that you've been working yourself ragged, and your not surprised he hasn't even touched a text book (let's be honest, Billy doesn't strike me at the type of person to take notes in class, just pull out a pencil and paper to look like he's interested and go about his day).

Your freaking out, because finals but he doesn't flinch because you're like the smartest person he knows.

"Oh c'mon," he's managed to take your precious notes away, "You'll be fine, you're only stressing yourself out."

"Billy, I need those!"

"No you don't," He starts acting like he's reading the notes outloud, but he's getting the facts and formulas all wrong.

You correct him several times, and have actually started to chase him around the library.

Finally he closes the book after your sure you must have chased him around at least twice, "See, I told you. You don't need to study, you know this shit."

You both got kicked out of the library, again.

Billy is banned, but the librarian gives you one last chance...starting tomorrow.

You sigh in defeat, "Alright you proved your point, now give me my notebook back."

You reach for it.

"Nah," He raises it above his head so you can't reach it. Asshole.

Tommy and Carol show up and they think he's picking on you.

Neither of you sees them.

Tommy manages to snag the notebook, gives you an obnoxious laugh when you reach for it, and tosses it to Carol

"Give it back, shit face," Your mood went from playful to pissed in point zero seconds.

"What are you going to do about it, Heinz?"

Lord help you, you're about to throw hands again.

Billy snatches the book back and hands it to you, before looking at Tommy and Carol with a very stern expression.

"You idiots got anything better to do, huh?" He takes a few steps towards Tommy and for every step he takes, Tommy backs away.

Carol is distracted, which allows you to snatch your notebook back. She reaches for it again but you slap her hand away.

The message was very clear for them, so they take their leave and retreat back to wherever they came from.

Billy has lunch with you and manages to get you to skip the rest of school with him.

You don't want to miss during dead week, but the whole fiasco during your study period in the Library got you thinking- you need a break.

You also don't want the absent strike.

"You're such a goodie-two-shoes."

Peer pressure sucks.

You convince him to give you 30 minutes after the late bell rings to show up.

You go to class, set up your desk, the late bell rings, teacher calls role and marks you present. 7 minutes have passed.

You feign being ill.

It really wasn't hard. You just acted more tired than normal, threw in a couple "I have to stop what I'm doing because I have a headache," gestures. You even put your head down for a minute. You sit in the front so your body language is easy to pick up on and the teacher allows you to go to the nurses office when you ask. 12 minutes have passed.

When you get to the nurses office you throw the pass on the desk and storm into the private bathroom - closing the door behind you, before forcing yourself to dry heave. 27 minutes have passed.

You convince the nurse that it must be something you ate that's making you sick.

She gives you a pass and let's your teachers know you're sick and have gone home.

You meet Billy outside the school 30 minutes on the dot, he's surprised you actually came, and even more surprised that you lied well enough to get the teachers to excuse you for the rest of the day.

Of course you're upset when you see Tommy and Carol in the back seat, but you just roll your eyes and brush it off before climbing in shot gun.

Tommy and Carol are mocking you before you even get in.

"We didn't know the, mutt was coming along."

"How nice of you to bring something to entertain us, Billy."

Your looking at Billy through the corner of your eyes as he starts the car.

He waves you off, "Dont mind them."

You have no idea where you're going, or how long it will take so you pull out a book to read.

Before you can even open it, Carol snatches it from you, "What's the Nerd reading?!"

You roll your eyes again.

Tommy snatches it from the red head, "Stephan King. Christine."

"What's it?" Carol pipes up again, "Sappy romance novel?!"

"Wow, you both are actually uncultured, " you snatch the book away from Tommmy, "I'm impressed," and keep it out of his reach by out stretching your arm towards the dash, "Did it take all three of your brain cells to read that?"

Tommy tries to get his hands on you now, but you smack them away.

"Alright, alright!"

The three of you look surprised at Billy, "If you two don't quit your shit," he looks to the rearview mirror, "I'm kicking you out."

The rest of your ride was uneventful.

You arrive at Tommy's house.

His parents are also out of town.

But he lives in a large house with a pool and bar.

They're having an end of the year party and whoops you got dragged along.

You hadn't planned to be doing this with your time so you resort to studying more, much to Billy's behest, and Tommy and Carol's attempts to distract you.

You sit outside on a lawn chair next to the pool while they get everything prepped for the night.

Not much happens till it starts turning dark out, Billy calls you for help with something and when you leave you don't notice Carol and Tommy going for your stuff.

You can imagine your suprise when you find you stuff had been emptied into the pool.

Notebooks, text books, pencils, pens, erasers, even the book you were trying to read on the way.

You look up when you hear Carol laughing as she rounds the pool in your direction, and you see Tommy throw your bag in the pool.

"Are you fucking serious? What are you twelve?!"

Before you can react, Carol shoves you into the pool.

"And that's how you get a book worm to swim!"

You somehow manage to keep your cool, gathering your stuff and putting them on the edge of the pool away from Tommy and Carol. Though you didn't know why you bother, you can tell the ink is smeared and the pencil is faded now, only thing possibly salvageable was your pencils and your reading book, but even that was debatable.

You climb out and sit at the edge.

You feel physically uncomfortable

Your clothing is sticking to you.

And it's basically summer already so the air is hot and a little damp. You look up to see Billy storming out of the house.

"What the hell is going on?!"

"Relax, Billy, we were all just having a little fun, right?" Tommy looks at you like you're afraid of him so you're going to agree with him.

Yeah, no.

"Fuck off," you chuck your biggest text book at him.

None of them knew how well a text book could fly till it hits Tommy in the gut.

Go you! Bonus points for nailing him with the corner.

Your trying to wring the bottom of your clothes out when Tommy comes up from behind you and tries to grab you by the back of your head.

"Hey!" Billy is quickly making his way over to the both of you.

Carol tries to stop him, but she is poetically shoved to the side and subsequently falls into the pool.

You manage to elbow Tommy in the balls but the pain only makes him hold on harder.

"You little-"

He doesn't get to finish because he's promptly punched in the side of the face. You quickly back away from the edge incase Carol gets anymore funny ideas.

Billy helps you up and ushers you into the house.

"Sorry..." He sounds awkward, "About them."

You look at him with a deadpan expression, "Billy Hargrove, apologizing," you sigh with attitude, "pinch me. I must be dreaming."

He grits his jaw, "Don't you start being a smart ass with me- it's them who keep giving you crap!" He started raising his voice.

"Yeah, yet you still keep them around," you make your way over to the sink to keep wringing out your shirt and shoulder check him on the way, "Honestly, I don't even know why you keep them around- at least you have your reasons for being an asshole." You take off your shirt -much to Billy's suprise- so you can properly get rid of the water. Let's face it, a soaked shirt sticking to you like a second skin doesn't leave much to the imagination anyways, "Reasons," you turn to look at him for emphasis, "Not excuses," you turn back to the sink, "but understandable reasons nonetheless." You lay your shirt out flat on the kitchen's large counter to air dry (it's too dark and humid outside for it to dry any better outside anyways), "But they're just assholes because....because...." You sputter and shake your head, "I don't know, probably because they know they won't ever amount to anything better in their lives, so they figure they might as well tear down as many people as they can on their way to fucking nowhere."

You turn and look at him with an aggravated huff and cross your arms. Unfortunately Carol and Tommy walk in at that moment.

"You trashy mutt!"

"Stupid whore!"

"You really think, Billy's that desprit?!"

For a second you were confused. Then you remembered you didn't have a shirt on.

You roll your eyes again before throwing your still wet shirt back on.

"And what the hell Billy?! You really gonna' side with this half-breed?!"

Fuck this.

Fuck Carol.

Fuck Tommy.

And you know what? If this doesn't change, fuck Billy too. You dont need or deserve this.

You storm out the back door, gathering your things and shoving them in your dripping bag before walking around the side towards the front. Billy quickly runs out the front door to meet you outside.

"I'll take you home."

"No."

Billy calls your name and he almost sounds tired.

His tone is what makes you pause and turn around.

"Please."

You raise a brow and swallow your pride as well as your snarky comments, "Fine."

The party commences and goes on without the both of you.

Billy isn't quite sure what he enjoys more, being out and partying or enjoying a relaxing evening indoors, heavens knows he can't relax at home.

Max surprises the both of you by stopping by to visit.

The three of you hang out in your living room flipping through channels and eating popcorn.

Billy eats the least pop corn out off the three of you and opted to have some carrots and grapes less than half way through the first movie.

Billy is totally a health buff.

"Are Carol and Tommy really that bad?" Max mistakenly asked about your day.

"They have absolutely no redeeming qualities."

Max doesn't hide how she shoots a glance at her brother, 'And that fool does?' Is basically what her expression asked.

Billy glares at her from the couch opposite to hers and bites a carrot like it's her head.

You're covering your laughter with your hand.

From now on all my Imagines will be tagged by their titles, series, and parts! Hopefully this will make it easier to find a specific imagine if your looking for it. For example, anything relating to this series is tagged with "impossible", the series itself is tagged as "impossible series" and each individual part is tagged as "impossible pt.[1/2/3/etc.]"

Another example: part one is tagged as "impossible pt.1"

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shawnpetermuffins · 6 years ago

Text

Disney Daze

A/n: This took forever to write just because of who I am as a person and I had like 0 motivation. But I'm back and ready to write. I really like this concept, so I hope the story does it justice.

Summary: They call it the happiest place on earth. Shawn and y/n think other wise.

Warnings: fluff and lots of it, slight mentions of smut.

***

Shawn looks down at you, his girlfriend, his hands tangled in yours. She's beautiful, he thinks to himself. You're standing next to him, sunglasses shielding your y/e/c eyes - they're his favorite place to get lost. You've been together for two years, and he'd been touring the majority of that time, so when he finally got some "time off" he took you with him to California.

Of course you had hoped it would be just the two of you on this little adventure, but would never admit that because he wants to see his friends too. And lucky for you, you're good with his team, so having them tag along wasn't all bad. Except for when Shawn got a little more handsy than he usually would and the guys would point it out by making more sexual jokes than you'd like. Neither of you are shy about the aspects of your relationship by any means; his friends and team use that against you though and love to make fun. They don't mean it maliciously, though and you both know that.

"You're undressing her with your eyes, Shawny boy," Teddy said, pulling the bill of his cap over his eyes. "I don't blame you though."

You laugh and fix his sunglasses while he pushes his hat back in place, "Oh Teddy, you're making me blush. I don't think your fiance will approve." You say just loud enough for Emily to hear. She was able to take a break from her busy filming schedule to join you guys.

"Oh, I approve. You're a cutie."

You shake your head, "Oh, you've got major competition now, bubs."

He hummed and pulled you closer. "They can look all they want. As long as I'm the one undressing you later tonight."

"Play your cards right and you just might get lucky," you said, wrapping your arms around his torso while you walked, making you both kind of slow down a little because the angle was all wrong, but neither of you wanted to let go. He hummed and kissed the top of your head.

"Where to first?" Josiah asked, but you two weren't paying much attention. You were so caught up in the proximity of each other that you couldn't focus on anything outside of your arms length - which just so happen to still be around each other. "Carsland it is!" He said after some discussion from the group. "Maybe we need partners. I'll be with y/n!" He exclaimed. That caught Shawn's attention.

"Over my dead body. She's my partner."

"Oh, so you can hear?" Andrew teased. "Good to know." He patted Shawn's shoulder. "Come on. We're going to Carsland."

"Wasn't Niall supposed to come with us?" You asked as you made your way deeper into the park. "Should we have waited for him at the entrance?"

Shawn shook his head, "He got tied up at the studio. Said he couldn't make it."

You got stopped only a handful of times on your way to the Cars, and that's probably the least amount he's ever been stopped in public with you. But neither of you minded the interruptions.

Shawn took you on nearly every ride - Radiator Springs Racers twice because he wanted to ride in both cars, took you into every store, begging to buy you something even though he'd already bought you more than you needed at the first store you went to. "They all have the same stuff," you shrugged, taking the change from his hand so you could do the penny press. "Really, bubs, I don't need anything else. I just want to make the pennies." You know he rolled his eyes from behind those glasses that covered his beautiful eyes far too well.

"There you guys are!" Teddy exclaimed when she finally found you in the corner of the shop. "Figures I'd find you making out in a corner."

"It's hard to make out when his hat literally hits my forehead every time he leans down to kiss me," I point out. Shawn chuckles and rests his hands on my waist.

"Why were you looking for us? We haven't been gone five minutes. We would have caught up." Shawn mumbled as we walked out into the blinding California sun.

"You've been gone twenty minutes. We started thinking you finally got mobbed." Finally, you giggled, as if it was an event that everyone knew would happen eventually. "Figured we would have to send out a rescue team here pretty soon."

"Well we're fine. No need to worry."

---

It was nearing three when you guys made your way over to the Disneyland side of the park.

"Look, babe!" You nodded to your right. "It's Belle!"

He hummed, "there's not a long line. You want to take a picture?"

"Only if you take one with me."

"Course I will. Josiah, will you take our picture?"

"That's what I do, man." He took Shawn's phone while we got in line.

"God, you're fucking beautiful," Shawn muttered to himself when he looked through all the photos you've taken together today. You and the team were all sitting in a shaded area, rehydrating after having walked for hours upon hours. You and him, however, didn't seem to be slowing down. He had managed to take you on another few rides, except for the really tall ones like splash mountain; you were on the verge of tears when he suggested it. So instead he took you to ride the tea cups - three times. He was currently rewatching the video he took of you spinning the cup around, giggling and just genuinely having a great time. He loved seeing you this way. Carefree and vibrant. It wasn't often that you let this side of you out and he knew that, making sure to bask in every moment where you didn't have a single care in the world.

Your chin rested on his shoulder, water bottle nearly empty in your hand. "Have I told you yet that I think you look very handsome today?" You pressed a soft kiss to the shell of his ear and heard him take in a breath.

"No. But thank you." His hand found your free one and he brought it to his lips for a quick kiss, and even though you wanted to keep your hands joined, his were starting to clam up and they were way too hot for you to hold them comfortably. "And have I told you yet that I'm so desperately in love with you?"

You thought it over, "Only like three times since we sat down," you teased.

"Haha, very funny." He booped the tip of your nose. "I'm still gonna tell you again. I love you. I mean it. I really, really do."

You hummed and leaned in to press a quick kiss to his cheek "I love you, too, rockstar." His hand rested on the back of yout head and he smoothly brought you to his lips, kissing you nice and slow, a soft gasp eliciting your mouth when his teeth sunk in your bottom lip.

"Hey!" Andrew threw an empty water bottle at the two of you, "We're in public! Keep it in your pants, maybe?" He said as you separated from your boyfriend, your face feeling hot.

Shawn shook his head, laughing, placing his tattooed hand on your thigh. "They're never allowed to come anywhere with us ever again."

"Definitely not," you agreed.

---

The walk back to the car consisted of Shawn running around aimlessly with you on his back and you laughing uncontrollably into his shoulder.

"Why were we never that cute?" You heard Teddy ask Emily when Shawn set you down and just as quickly picked you back up bridal style and once again started running around like a maniac.

"It's ten o'clock! Calm down, eh?" Andrew suggested.

Shawn ignored him and placed a chaste kiss on your neck. "Come on, Andrew. You never been in love before?" He asked, finally putting you back on the ground, but keeping hold of your hand and spinning you around once, pulling you back to his chest so that you were walking - stumbling, would be a more accurate description - synchronously.

Once back to the hotel, you all went separate ways. Andrew and Josiah went up to bed, Teddy and Emily went to the bar, and you and Shawn went to the pool after changing into your bathing suits. "Hey," he whispered into your hair while you walked casually against the edge of the pool.

Your eyes fluttered open to look at your beautiful boy. "Hmm?" Your hands found purchase in his curls.

He reached out and grabbed the back of youd thighs, and you wrapped them around his waist. "Thank you for today." He pressed a soft kiss to your temple and slowly started trailing them down to the base of your throat.

"I had fun," you managed to breathe out before his teeth grazed your collar bone. "Oh," you moaned softly.

"You looked beautiful today. Couldn't take my eyes off you." His kisses trailed even lower and his hands slipped under the strings of you top.

"Really?" You giggled. "I hadn't noticed."

"I want you," he murmured into your chest, slickly untying your top.

You squealed and hit his arm, "Babe! We're in public!"

He looked around at the completely empty poolside, "Oh yeah, people are definitely gonna say something." His hands cupped your breasts and your eyes closed at the contact.

"Shawn, please," you said into his neck.

"You wanna go to the room?" He asked, his left hand inching it's way to your bikini bottoms.

You gulped and nodded when his fingers met your unexposed skin. "Now, please."

---

Breathing heavily, he pressed a gentle kiss to your lips as climbed off him. "Thank you, baby. So good to me."

You could only hum in response. Catching your breath, you found his hand and played with his fingers for a little bit before you felt yourself growing more and more sleepy. "I love you," you muttered, rolling onto your side.

"I love you," he said back, curling his arm around your waist. Laying beneath the sheets, with his arm wrapped around your naked body, you knew there was no place on earth you'd rather be.

***

A/n: this took so long, I'm sorry. My next fic will be up Wednesday or Thursday though, I promise.

#shawn mendes #shawn mendes blurb #shawn mendes fanfiction #shawn mendes imagine #shawn mendes one shot #shawn peter raul #shawn mendes angst #shawn mendes fluff

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hoopdiddies · 6 years ago

Text

I'm Not Over You // Ben Hardy x Reader (Part 6)

A/N: Y'all I'm so mad cos this is my third attempt in posting this and hoping it would appear as I load my page. Btw, thanks to everyone who supported this series so far, your comments and reblogs really hype me up to write more even when I don't feel like a confident writer ☺ ☺

Summary: You had always loved Ben ever since you two met in university and became the best of friends. That feeling went out like a candle flame when the two of you parted ways until he re-entered your life...but this time with someone who has already occupied his heart.

Warnings: Mentions of drinking, a hangover, fluff, slight swearing and angst.

Word count : 3k+

Tags: @haendel-me-with-care , @mrsdoradominguez-barnes , @mickmoon

Parts: 5 , 4 , 3 , 2 , 1

(Edited)

The first thing you usually expect the second you wake up is the sinking feeling of your plush mattress cradling your entire body, down to the last, visible patch of skin. Your room laced and embellished with an aesthetic ray of sunshine seeping through the gaps of the beige curtains, the light subtly refracting off of every daft corner.

But your current location bodes the contrary. You run your hand over the fabric you're laying on, the familiarity of it arousing you to sit up, ultimately finding yourself on the couch in your living room.

Just as you begin questioning why you're here and not in your own sleeping quarters, a blunt ache spreads in your head and you bring your hands up to your hair, pulling on the roots at the sudden, morning agony. You let out a gritty groan at the throbbing sensation, like someone is bashing you in the head with a hammer that's travelling in the speed of sound. You fall back onto the couch in a low cry to numb the pain, but blessed to find the Aspirin Joe had left last night on the coffee table for you to take– but you don't remember that.

You don't think twice before swiping it from the tray, desperate to alleviate the throbbing. You pop the pill in your mouth and wash it down with the glass of water from the tray, gasping as you feel it swirl down your system. In a breath of relief, you place the glass back on the tray and try to recall every bit that's happened last night.

You get one thing straight; you were heavily drunk and of course, waking up with an apparent hangover decreases your chances of remembering anything the previous night. However you do recall some stuff. Two of them being the moment you had your first drink with your colleagues and Joe arriving a minute after you had your seventh swig, respectively. You wonder if he was the one that took you back.

He has to be. Who else would put essentials, Chinese food and a cup of coffee on the table with a note that has been signed with a blotted 'Joe'?

You wonder where he is at the moment, if ever he's gone home or just presently in the bathroom. As soon as your headache subsides, you get off from the couch, grunting as you stretch your limbs from the position you slept in. You pull on your collar and take a whiff of sweat, perfume and vodka all merged into one, pungent emission. You grimace to yourself, hurriedly making your way to the bathroom to wash up, swearing to never drink like that again.

Upon stepping foot in front of the door, you grab onto the knob and put very little to no thought of what's about to unfurl, twisting it open only to be greeted by a hard bump on your first step in. You yelp as you stumble forward, expecting to greet the floor with a bone breaking kiss yet something hard and meaty cushions you from underneath instead. You lift your head up and lo, you've landed on no other than Ben's clothed chest.

Or rather Ben himself.

What the fuck is he doing here?!

No longer holding back that gasp, you prop yourself up on your hands that are on either side of Ben's head, his face dangerously close to yours with his hot breath fanning against your cheeks.

Since you have both landed on the moist tiles of the bathroom, getting up in a prim position is not going to be an easy task.

"Oh god, um, h-hey." You, unfortunately,utter quickly, your stutter evident. You're an inch away from kissing him and apparently, running out of breath from supporting yourself on your arms, plus your hands are gradually slipping on the tiles thereby lowering you even further.

Ben's bright, green eyes remain as comically wide as they could ever be, the corner of his lips twitching to a small smile as he responds with a hoarse yet guttural, "Good morning."

You have to admit one way or another, his messy, blond hair flopping on all sides and shaping his face in that manner must be illegal.

You shift just an inch to plant your fingers firm on the tiles, hoping to throw yourself off of him by the time you get a good angle to start from. Ben notices your struggle and suggests something else with his cheeks growing redder by the second.

"I'm going to pretend that this isn't awkward and allow you to just fall."

You give him small glimpses due to the agonizing proximity between your faces. "That's a terrible idea. I'm going to end up mushing your face and I know you wouldn't want that."

"You're slipping. You can't launch yourself up in that position." He mutters quickly with how fast you're sinking into him. Counting, you have at least a few seconds before your arms give in to the pressure and you make unwanted contact with Ben's face.

"Come on, Y/N. Joe would be furious by the time he returns and you're not up yet." He teases you and you feel his breath growing hotter along with his accelerated heartbeat as you de-escalate. You wish you could hit Ben for making fun of the situation right now. Rolling your eyes heavenward, you drop your head low and let your arms slide open, your face landing right into the crook of Ben's neck with your upper body slamming against his chest, the impact pushing out a low grunt from him.

Your breath against his neck has left him oddly shivering but you don't notice.

A success, you throw yourself off of him and haul him up along with you. "I won't tell Joe as long as you don't tell Rosy." He banters and you smack his chest playfully. He thanks you and asks how you're feeling after such a night.

You shrug. "I'm fine now after taking that Aspirin."

"Joe's gone out to buy breakfast. The two of us kinda crashed here for the night to look after you." A little bashful, Ben rubs his nape and it makes your heart skip a beat.

"That's thoughtful of you, boys. But what about-" a certain memory flashes in your mind and you recall spotting Ben with Rosy at the pub last night. You don't hesitate to ask him about the possibility of Rosy questioning his whereabouts, leaving out the bit of you seeing them both at the pub. "What about Rosy?"

Ben walks out of the space with you and leans against the wall. "Don't worry, she knows I'm with you and Joe."

You stop yourself from asking him any more questions to avoid friction, especially since you're still hung up on his engagement. You nod and re-enter the bathroom to rinse yourself, pausing halfway to peer at him over your shoulder, a smug smile present in your expression. "Your cologne was insulting."

Ben gives half a shrug, pursing his lips proudly at the fact. "Yours was not bad either, the vodka highlighted it." He chuckles and you tut, closing the door and facing the vanity mirror with your hands clutched on either side of the sink.

You scoff at the fading, crimson glow in your cheeks, even so at the fact that Ben's was just as bright as yours and he could've passed as a tomato at that moment. But that blush was born out of awkwardness.

Yours meant something else.

It definitely is a weird morning.

Half an hour later, Joe returns with a paper bag full of fruits and is welcomed by the sight of Ben having a quiet cup of decaf on the couch, man spreading and waiting for life to happen.

"Hey, mate." Ben greets without bothering to turn his head around. Joe narrows his eyes at your absence from the spot Ben is now kicking back on. "Hey. Where's Y/N?"

"Loo. She's taken the aspirin by the way."

Joe nods, blinking twice. He pads towards the kitchen with the paper bag cradled in his arms, setting them down on the counter and pulling out two apples. Right after wiping your face dry, you step out of the bathroom fresh and sling your face towel around your neck, seeing Joe and Ben chat up with bitten apples in hand. You approach them and take out a seat from the edge of the table, darting your eyes at either of them. "Quick question. What are you boys waiting for exactly?"

"Just for you to finish up. I bought some fruits by the way." Joe reminds you with his mouth full.

"You didn't have to?"

He sighs, less than willing to feel defeated. "But I wanted to, besides," a sly glint twinkles in Joe's eye as he furtively flicks his eyes at Ben who is across him, "I'd be a bad boyfriend if I didn't. My baby's got a hangover and she needs her vitamins." If it were only possible to do an effective spit-take with your own saliva, you would have done it by now. Pretty sure you could hear Ben's breath hitch in his throat.

You don't want to draw your brows together as a reaction to that, it might give away the lie. As much as you want to protest and possibly nudge Joe for not giving you a heads up, this was your doing in the first place and Joe's just keeping up with it, by somehow trying to make Ben jealous...and slightly uneasy. You nod slowly, reaching out to snatch Joe's apple and taking a huge crunch of it as it takes up all the courage you've dredged not to break eye contact with him, before handing it back to a stunned Joe. "Now you're a good boyfriend." You click your tongue and wink back at him, walking away to change your clothes.

Ben would be lying to himself if he denies getting dazed as you gave Joe the eye. He shifts uncomfortably in his seat, clearing his throat at how unusual that was. Of course, that was just you playing along and you feel as if you've tainted yourself with that flirtatious ogle.

Throwing a fresh shirt on, your phone lights up with a notification. You find that it's from the institution and it's been a while since they've emailed you.

Apparently your date of departure has been rescheduled to the 26th of February and it's a relief to know that you have a month left to gather important papers and prepare your passport. You tuck your phone away and exit your bedroom. You and the boys talk for a while and share some laughs as you whip up fruit smoothies in the kitchen, the messy tendencies far from being absent between every taunt.

Soon after finishing your drinks and helping you clean up the mess you've made in the kitchen, they remind you of a certain event they'd want to drag you along to.

"What is it? " You ask, wiping your hands.

Joe flails his arms as he gushes. "The Oscars! BoRhap has been put up as potential candidate, according to Brian."

Your eyes widen along with the smile on your face. "No way! Really?"

Ben grins even wider. "Yes, really! The possibility of Rami bringing home a 'Best Actor' award would be huge! I mean, you've seen the film thrice with me, surely you can conclude that his-"

"His performance was flawless. Yes Ben, I said that the first time I saw the film." You trail him off humorously and shift your pleased gaze at either of them. "I'm so happy for you, guys. Really. Rami's not the only one that's deserving of the award. You all do. I'm suing if they don't call the rest of you up the stage."

They let out a prolonged yet soft 'aww' at your faith in them, bringing you in for a tight hug. You enjoy the bliss for a few seconds before letting go.

"By they way, Y/N. When are you leaving?" Your expression flits faster than you could command it to as Joe puts up the question.

Be still, my throbbing fist.

You feel your heart quicken as Ben's smile slowly vanishes, looking mildly confused. "Leaving? What do you mean?"

You never told Joe about keeping it a secret from Ben the first time, the only person you told was Lucy. Taking advantage of Joe's delay to answer, you quickly dive in to speak. "Leaving for...a retreat!"

Not being the answer he expected, Joe opens his mouth to protest, but you give him the look to zip it and luckily, he does, opting to hear the explanation of the your decision later. You turn to Ben whose face couldn't contort any further from being baffled. You reassure him softly. "We're hosting a retreat at work this February. Just a few days out of town."

I suck at lying.

Ben could only ever mouth a soundless 'oh' as a response. Guilt dreads you from inside, knowing very well the pointlessness of hiding something important as you leaving to study medicine abroad from Ben. Your best friend. It sounds melodramatic and you're well aware of that but the possibility of the spark of your friendship going out the moment he says 'I do' is just inevitable.

You feel it in your gut and never have your intuition failed you.

Zoning out momentarily with the boys being oblivious to it, you faintly hear Joe ask Ben the date of his wedding. Your heart races at his significant mention of date. "Rosy and I have been planning it for a week now and decided on the 26th."

"This month?"

"February, mate."

The days went by fast. You felt like a bee working your ass off nonstop for nearly a month. Sure you got breaks, in the summit of weekends but you could rarely enjoy every passing second with a hodgepodge of obligations in mind. You just got off work with extra cash to purchase a new bag to use for when you depart, despite you being scheduled on the 26th of this month. The date didn't put you on edge before Ben's announcement of his wedding date and now, you can't help but worry.

You walk along the lines of luggage bags on display, finally picking out a silver one with the appropriate space to fill. You ask the sales clerk for the price and she tells you it's in no more than 150 pounds, which is enough. While waiting in line to pay, you brush arms with a slightly, taller figure, not bothering to look at them as you apologize.

"Y/N?"

That voice. You dart your eyes to your left, having your mood alter as you find Rosy smiling at you. "Oh. Hey, Rosy. What are you doing here?" You question, nearly impassive. Not that you aren't thrilled to run into her here - not that you are as well - but the best friend versus fiancee cliche is just not something you wanted to deal with in the first place.

"Just purchasing this purse," she waves a silver purse laced elegantly with sequins it before you, "what have you got there?" She gestures to the luggage bag you're holding. You restrain yourself from giving her the 'what does it look like, dumbass' face and answer monotonously, sighing. "Luggage...bag."

"Ah, any plans for the month to be in need of that?"

"Uh yeah. A retreat." Definitely not.

Rosy bobs her head slowly and you take a step forward, your turn coming up. "That's great. Ben and I are flying to LA this weekend to find a venue for our wedding, you know," she gives you a saccharine smile and your stomach churns, not from the news - it's nothing new - but at her delivery. It's as if she's reminding you of the line between you and Ben, and that you should always remain at the end of your line. You're pretty aware of that, you always have been that a reminder is never needed. Your eyes flicker briefly to her right hand by accident, catching an emerald-crusted, engagement ring glistening around her ring finger. The sight of it leaves a hard lump in your throat.

"That's nice. You're really having your wedding outside the country, huh?"

"Why wouldn't we?"

You shrug, pursing your lips and taking a step forward, nearly reaching the counter. "Nothing against it. I just think the expenses would be too much."

She scoffs at you, flipping her red hair to the side in an indirect yet uppity manner. "You know, Ben was right about you being the thrifty one. That's where he got it from."

You're not having any of this today. "It's an honor, in all honesty." You retort with a sarcastic smile before taking the spot in front of the registrar, your response turning Rosy a little sour. After the cashier sticks the receipt to the handle of the luggage bag, you drag it along with you but pause as Rosy reminds you smugly.

"You're invited, remember that."

It almost seems as if she knows how you feel about Ben and on top of that, she's handing you the reminder on purpose to prod you to your limit but you couldn't care less about what she thinks. She's got him. What else does she want?

When you first thought she wouldn't mesh with Ben well, your gut really stood out. But Ben loves her for possibly a couple of reasons and with nothing particularly overlooked so you have no choice but to accept that she will be playing a huge part in his life.

Their wedding day is the day you leave anyway, so that advantage has saved you the pain and the killer heels. It should be the very least of your worries.

You brush off her words and set a course for home, eager to slam the door shut and sleep through the entire stress.

On your way to your car, your phone rings for the seventh time today and you answer, opening the trunk to put your luggage bag in. "Hello?"

"You know it's stupid, I'm just behind you and this feels pointless."

You turn on your heels quickly and shake your head in bemusement even with your blood rushing headlong, putting your phone back into your pocket and nearly throwing a fist at Ben who's laughing from the shock on your face as you turned around.

How convenient.

I was just thinking of you.

"You idiot, what brings you here? I thought you had a convention to go to or something."

He jerks his shoulders up and takes a few steps closer to you. "Just took off from it. I came by to pick up Rosy."

It has become a challenge to maintain the look you have on right now. "Ah. Kinda ran into her back there."

"Really? What were you buying?"

Your nose crinkles as the breeze blows against your face. "Just a luggage bag."

He hooks his thumbs into his pockets, altering his stance. "For that retreat thing?"

"Yeah. Anyway, you should get in. What kind of fiance are you waiting out instead of making an effort to find her in there?" You taunt him a little and he brings his hand up to his mouth, covering it as to hide the grin that's taken shape. "I'll be in after asking you if you want to tag along to the awards."

You gawk mindlessly at him for a ticking second, scoffing. "For real? No, Ben. You know me. Award ceremonies and parties, especially the ones mostly filled with people who hold their noses up high, are not my strong suit." You express lightly, raising your hand up at him as you politely decline. The amused look on his face is one thing you wish to wipe off but enjoy beholding nevertheless. "Come on. You don't like parties but you've been to mine."

"That's because I did it for you."

"Would you go to this one for me too?" He's pulled off a look that would be hard for you to say no to. You stare up at his hooded eyes with one brow creased, weighing in mind your decision. You sigh in defeat, hoisting your hands up in surrender. "Fine!"

He pumps his fist in the air and cheers. "Yes! Joe's gonna be thrilled with this too."

"Pfft, why?"

"Um, he's your boyfriend? And he needs his date? You're doing this for him mostly? " He reminds you once more in a 'duh' tone, underlining it as a question in answer. It would take you the will of a warrior to resist whacking him in the face with your luggage bag but you're certain you've done that in an alternate timeline somehow. You cross your arms together and turn around to the driver's seat.

"So are you down really?" Ben questions one more time in a nervous tone, making sure of your willingness to go. You climb into your car and slam the door close, rolling down your window and lifting your brows at him, noting. "24th. I got it."

He flashes a contented beam at you and waves slowly. "I'll see you soon." One reassuring nod from you and you turn on your ignition, stepping on the gas and driving just a few feet away from him. You stop the car midway through the exit and peer at the outside mirror through which you see Rosy leap into Ben's arms happily, having him lower her afterwards for a sweet kiss. It doesn't take you a couple of seconds to look away and continue down the road, swallowing the lump in the back of your throat.

The sight still takes a toll on you.

#borhap #queen #ben hardy #ben hardy imagine #ben hardy x reader #borhap cast #borhap cast x reader #borhap imagine

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