#Idk maybe I should just annoy the community into pushing for this lol.

[cervidaedalus]

You want a Ranged Job with whips? You want rope of leather with limited movement? You want a weapon with some kinda ehhhhhh ethics and history? NO. YOU WANT ROPE DART. Rope dart is part of a category of "soft weapons" in kung fu, but has since also been expanded upon by the Flow Arts community. There are numerous categories of soft weapons including "whips" like chain whip and 9-section whip (similar to what Victor Belmont uses) which function very differently from your traditional wrapped leather whip and are leagues cooler. The movement of these is far more fluid, and the attachment of a rope dart, meteor hammer, monkey paw, etc allows for not only the ability to stab your enemy while engaging in social distancing, but greater control of the weapon via the Science of Physics (tm). This allows for beautiful and fluid attack animations on par with DNC and SGE.

The Job with the most diverse weapons in game is MNK, featuring knuckles, fists, claws, tonfa, katar, deer-horn knives, and more. With a rope-dart ranged, there are equally endless possibilities for the stylization of both the tether (chain, rope, silks, sections, etc) and the attachment (ball, blade, point, claw, fire, a dead rat, idk whatever). Currently, the only MMO with a rope dart inspired class is Black Desert, with the gender-locked Lahn. DON'T SLEEP ON ROPE DART.

[feuqueerfire]

23.5 Eps 9 - 12 Live Blogging

well... I started watching an on-air show after a long time (February 2023 Never Let Me Go, I'm not counting Our Skyy 2) and I really just binged the first 8 episodes and fell off lol. Interestingly, I also had to binge the last 4 eps of NLMG because I stopped keeping up weekly after ep 8 (though I did watch eps 4 - 8 on a weekly basis before that).

Anyway, I wasn't feeling a Need to come back to this show because I found the resolution to Ongsa-Earth underwhelming and the reaction I've seen to these last few episodes has also been middling, so hmm idk. I'm also just not in the mood for high school shows right now (I Will Knock You is also on-hold rip), so it feels a bit unfair to this show to watch it when I'm not in the mood but what can you do? I don't want to leave it hanging even after the show ends.

Ep 9: When The Earth Tilts (May 22/23)

9-1

aughhh I really don't know if I should make myself just watch this or not because they're being cute but I just... kinda don't care. I'm indeed in the mood for something more dramatic but I also think I'm just apathetic toward them the way I became toward Akk and Ayan as soon as The Eclipse finished airing and also to Palm and Nueng toward the end of the show (although I loveeee Palm and Nueng now after some time has passed, so maybe that'll be the case here too?)

the introduction of the exchange program

Oh, dad and Ongsa just moved to Bangkok and they're getting to live as a full family, so I guess Alpha and mom lived here before

Aw, Aylin interacting with them and forcing her mouth to do smiles to try to fit in/communicate with human family

I... watched 10 mins the whole day, rip

am I being unnecessarily harsh on this show or does the conversation not seem... natural between Onsga and Sun like it's just a bike riding scene and it should be fine but why am I just like... this isn't how people talk.

at first I was like nooo Ayling shouldn't need to put on makeup to fit in the way she was trying at lunch with Alpha and Ongsa but it's cute if she wants to do it herself before meeting with Luna heh

khun faen hehe

pls not the two pairs competing

9-2

aw, Teacher Nida and Bambam helping an insecure Alpha

9-3

chef Alpha omg

no more P'Ton flirting, we have progressed past the need for P'Ton flirting

Aylin basically pieing his face was so deserved, idc that Ton helped Ongsa and Sun or whatever, he's annoying

oh nooo my poor overwhelmed Aylin

9-4

1 year scholarship to America

and now the guilt of Alpha telling Sun to not leave Ongsa, oh no

is this their first I love you? I can't remember

ahhhh the towel scene + kisses

lol I know how the scene ends because of spoilers but I would've lost my damn mind while waiting if I didn't know lol

I wasn't really into it at the start of this ep but I liked it again by the end!

I didn't mind Luna asking Aylin to socialize more with her family because it's a fairly small step since she already spends time with them and I think it'd be good for Aylin to push herself a bit out of her comfort zone and realize the benefits of maintaining relationships but the stuff at the end was too much, like why must Aylin sit at the table for lunch with a bunch of Luna's friends when she already struggles with people? I hope Luna thinks it through more next ep and apologizes but I'm nervous that that won't be the case based on some fan reactions, though idk if that was to ep 9 or ep 10.

Ep 10: (May 23/24)

10-1

plss Alpha with the knife truly is so funny

ah, Sun's out to her parents + they know Ongsa's her gf but Ongsa didn't know they knew everything

...not keeping secrets

and vaguely hypothetically asking about distance and time

10-2

secrets plaguing Aylin and Sun

oh, Sun's telling Ongsa. and she hasn't even taken the test yet and doesn't know if they'll make it. honestly a pretty good time to get Ongsa, no misunderstandings or really much secrecy yet

10-3

Teacher Bambam and Nida lmfaooo Bambam reading all the tarot cards correctly but not picking up on them being about HER!!

I feel like we've been finally learning more about Sun these past 2 eps through this scholarship and her desire for it

DON'T GIVE UP SCHOLARSHIP AND EXCHANGE PROGRAM AND NEW EXCITING EXPERIENCE FOR THIS RANDOM HIGH SCHOOL RELATIONSHIP

not even TESTING for the scholarship?!?! girl pls

I went to bed and was supposed to watch the last part before going to sleep but I didn't feel like watching Sun out Ongsa (maybe? based on a bit of the Next Part teaser at the end) so I'm here the next morning

10-4

my Aylin !!! :(

but also like... is it that big of a reveal that Aylin was bullied? feels like More should've been said or explored here?

I'm gonna smack Ton

the teachers confession!! hehe

Ongsa's right to tell Sun to pursue her exchange program dreams

okay Sun's outing of Aylin was accidental and I'll give it a pass because she's a teenager who has grown up in a very accepting home and they're all out at school, so she didn't think before mentioning the 3rd wheeling thing

but she should realize that Ongsa's trying to steer the conversation away and back off

instead of confronting Ongsa and outing her in front of her parents and wtf is "so you're never gonna tell them about me?" why is 'never' coming up here? you've barely been dating bruh and haven't discussed anything. like she could've been upset at Ongsa for keeping her a secret without feeling the need to declare it in front of her parents when Ongsa doesn't want to come out

and then just Leaving and riding away on P'Sunny after doing all that?!?!?

I've seen that Ongsa's the one who has to apologize to Sun apparently and I don't want to watch that at all.

Ep 11: (May 24)

11-1

indeed you should've been mad at finding out Ongsa's Earth, would've made more sense than here.

NO MORE TON, ENOUGH

11-2

do I care about Tin and Mawin? I cared more earlier on in the show but now idk

why is there so much Ton, he and Charoen better not end up together like she literally does not like that man

I don't really get the 'you don't understand me at all' thing tbh

11-3

parental acceptance

another series mention of worrying about disappointing the parents

the thing is I just feel like coming out isn't only about "you worry too much about what others think" like that's not the same category as Ongsa not telling anybody about Sun and her dating because Sun's popular while she's not. It has more to do with possible pushback and violence from her own family where she didn't feel safe enough to come out. and i just don't like that coming out and being publicly with a girl is treated as the same thing as 'caring too much about other people'

and like make your home and environment a very explicitly queer-accepting space so that your daughter isn't so afraid of coming out to you and doesn't know what reaction to expect wtf

11-4

losing my entire mind at the Luna/Aylin scene, they're soooo cute, I'm soooo giddy hehehehehehe

Sun's parents at least telling her to not change for the one she loves

and Sun says sorry too

long-distance incoming, i'm guessing we'll get some time skip next ep

So close to the finale, finally

Ongsa sending Sun Hundreds of texts and going to her home at night is why. at least Sun called her out on the texts + acting unhinged publicly about the sun, but why have her go to Sun's house at night while Sun's explicitly ignoring her and knock and text and stuff. at least Alpha was taking her away but still. I'll overlook it (kinda how I still was so into PaiSky in Love In The Sky despite Pai's endless SIMs and calling) but it's been noted.

Ep 12: Promise Me... Sun (May 24)

It's a shame that my feeling is glad that I'm almost done rather than being sad about reaching the end.

12-1

Aylin, I freaking love youuuuuu, cutieeeeeee

12-2

terrible cook Ongsa, so true, same girl

12-3

the merch alien hat

at least we're not getting Ton with Cheroen

12-4

Grade 11... were they in grade 10 before?

the separation being in the literal last part is later than I expected

Aylin putting the Luna love note in her mouth hehehe

Nida/Bambam plssss lmfaoo

no! Ton and Charoen are not in love, leave her aloneeeeeeeeee

Aylin is such a trickster when it comes to getting kisses hehehehehehhe

no more glasses for Ongsa, I saw this on a Tumblr post and was like ?! >:(

reunited

Overall:

GMMTV's first GL and MilkLove's first full GL; I was super excited, especially after having watched MilkLove in Bad Buddy and the Magic of Zero special, which is why I started watching this on-air (thought I'd start it even earlier than ep 8 but didn't because of exams). So it's a shame that I feel so... nothing about the show, especially the main couple; I think Aylin/Luna is my fave ship in here. I think I also just wasn't much in the mood for a silly high school romance series right now, which isn't the show's fault but contributed to why I didn't feel the pull to continue watching the show. When I did watch it, it could get pretty cute though, I giggled/gushed a few times, especially about Luna and Aylin. The teachers' storyline was cute too, though barely there. Aylin was the MVP for sure.

Rating: 6/10

[wendytestabrat]

why i think stan is a mild aspie

ok like ik stan was just diagnosed with aspergers as a joke and aspergers isn’t even a real disorder in south park but like i def feel like there was some truth to that diagnosis bc i think stan does have some aspie/autism tendencies. i mean even tho stan is the most social and popular of the boys or whatever you can tell he still does struggle with social cues and communication at times i think this is why everyone in stan’s life just takes advantage of him *COUGH kyle and wendy COUGH* bc he doesn’t rlly know how to set boundaries. stan’s too nice to people and just goes along with whatever idk if that’s an autism trait but i think some people with autism are like that. but i also think this is why wendy gets annoyed with stan sometimes in their relationship bc he sucks at communicating and he gets so anxious with her that he pukes. stan can just be kinda oblivious & awkward at times and sometimes he won’t even know or can’t tell that wendy is mad about some shit until it’s too late lol. like i think “cock magic” is the best example like how did stan deadass not know wendy was on the volleyball team like even cartman knew LOL. there’s that deleted scene where wendy jumps down stan’s throat for it and she tells him that she said she’s on the volleyball team a bunch of times to him but he didn’t listen & he didn’t take her hint at the beginning when she said he should show his support for the volleyball team like he thought she meant she was going to the game just to watch instead of play. also another example of stan’s obliviousness was him being the only kid in the class to not know tolkien’s name was spelled tolkien LOL. stan also gets rlly in the zone sometimes and he has his little quirks and fixations he focuses on like most people with aspergers like how stan gets rlly into board games or magic the gathering and also he really likes songwriting too and cares abt helping animals. i mean stan will go to great lengths to help animals out like in “whale whores” even when no one else gives a shit and he has to do it by himself. also remember when he got so fucking hooked on freemium gaming that he gambled away all of the family’s money? LOL i also think the reason why stan stays friends with kyle even tho he’s a shit friend is bc it’s what he’s familiar with and he just doesn’t want things to change which is how people with autism are they like their routine and familiarity hence why he got so depressed when everything was changing in the episode “ass burgers” & he didn’t know how to move on and not be friends with kyle anymore. same with how stan refuses to date a girl other than wendy and he’s always trying to make his relationship with her work. stan is also not a very emotive person which is common in aspergers, because stan usually has a blank expression on his face most of the time and it takes a lot to get him to react to shit, but then when stan is pushed to his limit and he gets angry he fucking explodes lol. stan’s also a rlly smart and rational person, fuck the people who say kyle is the most logical one bc stan is lol. you can tell stan thinks things through logically and he doesn’t like having to deal with emotions in situations. i think a lot of this can be easily debunked or explained by something else like stan’s depression or maybe he’s just a rlly aloof person. but i think it’s worth pointing out. again, stan is pretty social unlike most people with aspergers which is why if he has it i think it’s only a mild case rather than someone with severe autism. but i think stan might just be as popular as he his bc he’s just a nice person like that and he doesn’t ever try to get into beef with anyone so people like being around him. i wanna hear what ya’ll think is this something you’ve noticed too or did u just pass the whole aspergers diagnosis as a joke like the episode intended.

[anime-kia]

Noncommittal

I guess this is me getting somethings off my chest. I'm in my feelings and I'm SICK! Men are annoying LMFAOOO:(OOOOO.

Warnings: Angst

Relationship: Ex Boyfriend Erik x Reader (but y'all are talking... cuz... feelings...)

I was listening to You Don't Know by Tank feat. Wale while writing this. You can also listen to Kehlani's new album if you need a soundtrack lol.

You had no idea what plans God had made for you when this man walked into your life. It had to be some sick joke. 

You met Erik five years ago, and dated eight months after knowing each other. He was perfect, your ideal partner that you weren't actively seeking. You even saw a future with him, a small wedding, and maybe a few kids, but it all came crashing down in an instant. 

Broken communication and wandering eyes were the key factors in the end of what you thought was your future. 

Baby ❤️: I'm just not feeling it anymore...

You couldn't count on your fingers how many times you read his text over and over again. He didn't even the balls to breakup with you in person. 

The tears fell from your eyes, coating your phone screen in a slick layer. Constantly you wiped it with your sleeve, but more kept falling. 

The devastation left you to leave him with a simple 'Okay'. Too broken to be mad, and for months, too sad to be optimistic. 

You spent nights in bed, tears streaming down your cheeks. He was running through your mind from morning to night. Despite all your friends telling you to forget about him, it was hard to forget someone who had you smiling so hard that your cheeks started to hurt. Laughing so hard that tears would spill from your eyes. 

But those were happy tears...

Now... These tear filled eyes were followed by headaches, heartache and snot.  

Though Erik himself stayed off of social media, his new girlfriend surely didn't. Thanks to your best friend, the pretty brown skin with hazel eyes was now someone you stalked from time to time. Just to see his face... That smile that had you bending at will, his every command. 

There were a few videos of them, at restaurants, the basketball court, and other places he would visit with you. Often times he would push the camera away when she aimed it at him, complaining about "the feds".

However there was one picture that made you itch. His head wasn't in the frame, but she had hers against his chest, manicured fingers sprawled across that brawny frame. The caption made it even worse: He's gonna put a ring on it 😘 

Only if she knew that Erik didn't like commitment... That would've avoided the horrible remarks she made about him exactly two weeks after that last post. 

You felt embarrassed for her, but at the same time you were happy that she wasn't with your m- With Erik. 

A couple years later and you were back to yourself, not pressed or crying over Erik anymore. He wasn't running through your mind day to night. 

It was all going great, you were even dating again. And just before you did enter a relationship with the date your sister set you up with, he came back.

A contact that shifted all the way to the bottom of your list had made its way back on top.

His number being the only thing showing, but you memorized it long ago.

Hey. Wyd?

You stared at the message, heart rate picking up and all the emotions flooding back in at once. 

A simple question as that and you felt like you'd been ask to solve the hardest equation in the world. 

Should I ignore it?          

But of course you couldn't. Your heart wouldn't allow you to.

Getting ready to go on a date.

Petty always was the best way to go...  However, it was true. Your date would be pulling up in the next thirty minutes to take you to an Italian restaurant. 

When you getting back?

Again, you stared at the message baffled. What did it matter to him?

Idk.

And that was that. 

Or so you thought. 

"I don't know, the way that waitress was staring at you makes me feel like I have competition." You joked with your date, Rome, who just pulled into your driveway.

But the lights shining on the figure sitting on the steps of your front porch had the both of you quiet for a moment.

"Nah, maybe I'm the one who got competition." He said with a troubled tone.

"I... Rome, thank you for this. I'll call you later, okay?" You kissed him on the cheek and exited the car.

"You want me to come with you?" 

"I'll be okay." You gave him a smile. He nodded and you waved him goodbye, watching as the car pulled out of the driveway.

Erik was staring at you, still seated. It was hard to see his face now that the headlights weren't shining anymore, and the porch light was off. 

You walked closer, ready to remove your heels that threatened to toss you to the ground with a small misstep. 

"Why are you here, Erik?" 

"To see you." 

"For what?" 

"What you mean for what? I'm not allowed to see you?"

You stared at him incredulously. 

"There's nothing to see..." You moved around him, but he caught your arm, staring your body down.

He would say otherwise. Erik kissed his teeth, irked that you had the audacity to step out the house in a slim fitting dress and high heels for another man. 

"Nah, there's a lot to see, ma." He bit his bottom lip, gold slugs glowing in the dark. His eyes were drowned in lust, hypnotizing you as if nothing happened.

Things were never the same, even after you allowed him back into your life. You didn't take him back, you couldn't. 

The fear of him breaking your heart, and the fear of the feelings you felt all those years ago terrified you. So all you could resort to was a situationship. 

Admitted, it wasn't ideal for your future plans. You still wanted to get married and you still wanted children. Everything Erik didn't want back then. 

However, one drunk night of FaceTime resulted in you promising to have his baby in the next few years. Was it a mistake? 

At first, you believed that he didn't want to be in a relationship with you, but if there was one thing you could confirm, it was that he didn't want you to be boo'd up with anyone who wasn't him.

Until one day he made a suggestion.

"I think you need to be with me."

You stared at him, one eyebrow raised then looked away before speaking. "I really don't think that's a good idea, Erik." You couldn't look him in his eyes.

Of course you wanted him back, you were in love with him. No matter what he did, your heart couldn't let go of him. But you refused to be broken again. 

"Why not?"

"Cuz I don't want to go through everything we did before. I can't."

After that, he didn't bring it up again. 

Though you wanted him to, just to vent to him and get everything off your chest. But he wouldn't... So you were left with an active mind, which became even more active once he started showing up less.

Not a text, not a phone call.

Truly, you were exhausted. You were sick of him putting you in your feelings, just to go MIA and return at his own will. 

It made you wonder if he even cared. Or were you just entertainment while other females weren't available? 

You were a human with valid emotions.

No matter how much you cussed him in private, saying you were done with him, you knew it was lie. 

He had you wrapped around his finger, because maybe fate decided that he was your soulmate. A twisted and sick joke made by the universe, tying you to this man who didn't know within himself what he wanted. 

Maybe Prince Charming would be out there to save you one day, but for now... Erik Stevens had you under a spell that felt impossible to break. 

I hope y'all enjoyed!

I been meaning to get this off my chest and into my diary (yes I have one), but I decided to write instead and of course due to story purposes I changed up quite a bit from my actual situation lol. 

Thanks for reading!

(Start/Finish: May 17, 2020)

[yesimwriting]

hi, i love all your work! could i please request headcanons for what it'd be like to go from being enemies to lovers with nikolai lantsov.

thank you:)

A/N maybe i moved this up on my request lists bc i woke up today and went 'nikolai lantsov'

--

- i'm being a little liberal with cannon bc my mind first went to 'princess! reader who hates nikolai bc they're competitive and then they have to team up together to try to get their parents to break up their arranged marriage but fall in love in the process (this might be a little undetailed but i'm thinking of writing a full fic or mini-series with this plotline so let me know if you'd be interested!! i could see a smutty ending to that fic but idk,, lmk what you thing ig lol)

- Ok so first off enemies to lovers with the loml nikolai lantsov would be SO GOOD bc he's so dramatic and obviously attractive so even though you hate him you know he's hot,, there's never a dramatic realization that he's attractive bc it's just a fact

- butttt you'd rather give up any claim you have to your family's throne than feed his already gigantic ego

- okk but lets get to the beginning of your enemies to lovers relationship

- so basically every summer your parents go and stay with Nikolai's family at this super fancy vacation home bc your parents are both royalty and your kingdoms have a very healthy relationship

- just bc it's the summer season doesn't mean it's summer vacation,, so as children for about a month you two share a tutor,, and when i tell you that created a rivalry so fast i mean it

- you're not the eldest princess and you're always trying to be the best for your parents approval, nikolai just wanted to impress the really smart girl who had a pretty laugh (poor nikolai lol,, he had no way of knowing how important being the best in school no matter what was to your self esteem)

- maybe if you two could communicate you’d like each other a little better at this point but it starts when you’re pretty young and by the time you’re like 13 it’s a solidified dynamic (and 13 year olds are the MEANEST and most insecure people in the world so that’s when your relationship turns to full enemies)

- now that you’re 13 you have more princess-y requirements, especially over the summer. So when you see that Nikolai gets to practice with swords and gets more free time while you have to practice setting tables you hate him more than ever. 

- Nikolai senses that you’re extra hostile but he has no idea why,, he tries asking once but he makes a joke about how ‘maybe you’re jealous bc youre no longer the center of my attention’ and even though he’s just trying to ease the tension you feel like he’s making fun of you

- so that’s when things get aggressive, but at that point summer is almost over so it’s whatever

- next summer comes and you’re still SO MAD at him,, so when you get to the estate you’re like ‘i’m not even talking to him idc how quiet these next three months are’ 

- and you get there all determined to hate him,, but once you get there and see him something in you cracks bc he had the audacity to spend the last year going through puberty AND LIKE HE’S ALWAYS BEEN CUTE BUT THIS IS SOMETHING ELSE 

- so youre mentally panicking bc how do you even talk to someone that looks like that now???? but then you remember that you didnt even want to talk him so in a panic youre like ‘maybe i can avoid him and he’ll just assume it’s bc i hate him bc i do,, who cares if he’s unbelievably hot now’ 

- nikolai doesn’t assume anything, he just gets to the estate and is like ‘why hasn’t she insulted me yet?? is she suddenly too good to give me attention?’ so during the lessons that you still share he gets an idea

- he decides to one-up you in everything bc that’s always gotten a reaction out of you 

- it works,, every time he corrects you or steals an answer from you, you’re ready to snap but then you look at him and take in his stupidly perfect face and  you just shut up 

- nikolai thinks it’s not working so he just tries harder

- by the end of week one you can’t take it anymore so when the tutor leaves at the end of lessons you snap, you tell him off for how often he’d repeat what you said and change a few words and get all the praise from the tutor

- on the inside he’s like ‘took long enough’ but the more you rant he’s like ‘is she okay???’ he’d be more concerned if you weren’t threatening his pride and at this point he’s still annoyed bc if you were that annoyed you should have just talked to him instead of ignoring him for a week

- he’s thinking that just bc you got really pretty over the last year doesn’t make you too good to yell at him on the daily

- the worst thing anyone can do to nikolai is ignore him LMAO (lowkey relatable)

- so he starts arguing with you and you’re so upset that you forget about how aggressively attractive he is 

- and you two are alone in this room and the more you argue the closer you two get

- the climax of the argument is when neither of you are yelling, you’re just so mad you’re beyond raising your voice and once you’re both at that point it goes like this: 

“Nikolai Lantsov, you are the most insufferable person I’ve ever met” 

“Well then, Darling, you should look in a mirror.” 

“You are so entitled, so ridiculously self obsessed that it ruins your attractiveness.” 

“...” he literally just like blinks twice. “You think I’m attractive?” 

“Uh? No--i didn’t say that at all, maybe if you didn’t have the language comprehension of a child you’d understa--” he just reaches forward, grabs the collar of your dress, and kisses you. 

- it’s your first kiss so you have no idea what you’re doing and it’s with some one you CANT STAND and you’re so mad bc you had expectations for your first kiss and he’s taken that from you--but the thing is,, 

- he’s good at it. Like really good at it. Like so good it makes you curious about what he does the nine months of the year he’s not stuck here with you bc there’s no way he hasn’t had practice. 

- but you’re also extremely confused and nervous and aware of how stupid you’re being (and a little hormonal bc being 14 isn’t easy) and then he places his hand on your cheek and that snaps some sense of reality into you bc it’s one thing to enjoy the kiss but another thing entirely to want him to escalate it

- so you place one hand on his chest and push him off of you slightly. He takes the hint, pulls away enough to look at you and then you two just stare at each other 

- your hand is still on his chest and you have absolutely no idea what comes next, but you find yourself looking at his lips

- since you haven’t slapped him or pulled away more than a few inches he thinks maybe things are okay so he leans forward slightly and kisses you again. 

- you reciprocate a little too fast, the kiss lasts two seconds before thinking about how insane you’re being so you push away entirely. 

- He lets you go,, and in the most awkward display ever you’re like ‘uh I need to go,, i can’t be late to ball preparation lessons’ and you leave that room faster than you’ve ever left a room in your entire life. 

- the next day you consider pretending to be sick to avoid him but that would only give him more power over the situation so you go,, and he’s just sitting there calmly

- youre on edge the entire day but he never even jokes about it

- a part of you is a tiny bit annoyed bc who kisses you and then pretends it never happened? but overall, you’re relieved 

- the days pass and it never comes up but now whenever you two argue you think of how quickly kissing him both shut him up and got rid of your tension 

- the summer goes by quickly, your usual dynamic has returned and you wonder if he even remembers kissing you. twice. in a row. 

- the next couple of years are normal,, even when you two no longer take lessons together you still dont like him. He’s just so assured and he takes such joy in bothering you. 

- and then one summer your parents sit you down and they’re like ‘we need to plan the future alliance of our kingdom’ 

- you’re a little confused bc you’re rarely allowed to sit in on these things bc you’re a girl and you’re basically meant to just be a royal’s bride--and then you realize why you’re there. 

- you start protesting before your father can finish announcing your engagement 

- the parents were smart bc they announced it at the end of summer so you two couldn’t drive them crazy or conspire

- the first thing you do when you get back to your castle is write to him for the first time ever 

- your letter is basically ‘pls tell me you’re doing something’ 

- the two of you talk until you come up with the plan to get your parents to break up your engagement 

- your parents dont really care about your feelings and they expect the two of you to argue with them,, but they care about the kingdoms

- so you two decide that if you act like youre so in love that you let your duties slip the engagement will end,, especially if you two are in love in a toxic way 

- so the next summer you two make sure to flirt and act like youre totally obsessed with each other and skip lessons together and just are constantly together and acting like you’re on a honeymoon

- your parents are like ?? since when 

- at one point you flirt with a random guard just so Nikolai can have a ‘jealous outburst’ while your families are strolling through the garden 

- ngl jealous nikolai had you ready to RISK IT ALL,, you were ready to drop the plan and marry him on the spot 

- he notices bc he notices everything about you and when your family walks away he gives you a quick kiss and youre stunned,, much to his delight 

- your desire to break up your engagement takes a slight backseat in your mind bc you decide to set off on a secret goal to make him flustered

- it doesn’t take much, your dresses get a little more risky, your comments get a little more suggestive

- the only problem?? he seems to have his own personal goal and it’s to make you even more flustered than he is

- soon the two of you are lost in layers of pretend and competition

- when your parents are finally thinking about delaying the engagement and keeping you two away from each other until you calm down a little (i feel bad for them,, an entire summer of being surrounded by the ULTIMATE sexual tension) 

- you’re sad and you don’t know why bc this is what you wanted, but then Nikolai stands up and says that you two planned for this and he has the letters to prove it (he was ready to drop the receipts LMAO) and youre like ??what are you doing?

- and he says he’d rather marry you then never see you again bc now all he wants is to get know you bc he has no idea how he wasted so much time arguing with you 

- and you just meltttt but your in front of your entire family and his as well so you just sit there for a minute and then you tell him you feel the same way 

- but the summer’s over

- you kiss him before leaving and he says you’ll have to visit bc he can’t go an entire year without seeing your ‘pretty face’ 

- you promise to visit him soon

- your at home for exactly a day and a half before getting an invitation to visit him 

- you laugh bc the only way that letter could get to you that fast is if he mailed it before you even left 

- you say yes obviously,, and spend some time having a really cute fall-dating vibes together until you figure out how you really feel 

- and you feel like he makes your heart STOP and that’s why you hated him,, bc you didn’t like being vulnerable 

[whatifyoulivelikethat]

warnings: extremely negative feelings towards a sibling, distressing / intrusive thoughts. placed under a break due to the content of the message. remember, I'm not a mental health professional.

updated with additional viewpoints from readers at the bottom!

I'm sorry in advance.

I really hate my older sister. She never respects my boundaries, insults me frequently, and is just annoying and hypocritical in general.

I've always had these issues with her, but she lived at her own apartment away from me and the rest of my family, so I've been able to control my hatred of her. But last year in March she moved back in and sold her apartment. She has no plans of leaving anytime soon, and I can't stand her.

We shared a bedroom for about a year because we were also taking care of my cousin who also moved in with us last year. My cousin has since moved out, but my sister is unfortunately here to stay for a couple of years. But with extra space, I was able to move into the spare bedroom and thought that would be the end of my problems.

It wasn't. In fact, she has become even more unbearable. The hardest part of this relationship is that she has a weird obsession with being with me. I'm not sure if this is because she loves me, or she's just weird. I think she's weird because my parents never act like she does.

Our bedrooms are right next to each other. There's really no reason for her to miss me. But every single fucking minute she's coming into my room to bother me. I would have more empathy for her if she acknowledged my limits, but she doesn't.

She's constantly cuddling me after I've said for MONTHS that I don't enjoy it and it makes me uncomfortable. She constantly belittles me by saying I couldn't live without her, and that I would be a mess if it wasn't for her (mind you, I've lived without her at the house for YEARS and I was perfectly fine). She's constantly in my business, interrogating me about every little thing. She once locked the door and wouldn't let me leave the room without answering her questions for 20 minutes; she asked me about a $30 Amazon order containing manga I ordered with MY OWN MONEY. And I had permission for my parents to order it! It wasn't her business whatsoever.

I've tried to keep her out numerous times; I've gotten in trouble for it. My parents say I'm being mean and that this is her way of loving me. What I feel like they ignore is that I'M UNCOMFORTABLE. Her way of "loving me" HURTS.

I've tried communication. I've had multiple meetings with my family about my boundaries and they say they'll change, but they never do.

Another factor that worsens this is that I have borderline personality disorder. I'm currently being denied therapy or intervention of any kind. I get told my mental illness is a result of me having an attitude and hating my family.

I writing this to you because I've been having very alarming thoughts recently. I'm been somewhat suicidal as long as I can remember, but this is different. I've been having nightmares about killing my family/my family killing me. I don't want to kill my family. As much as they have abused me, I know they truly love me deep down. But when I'm in a mental breakdown, I don't think for the most part. I'm afraid I'm going to do something to hurt them if they continue to push me. I'm too scared to turn myself into the police and I don't want to be taken away from my home. I truly need therapy, but it's expensive and I'm not allowed to get it.

Are there any options left for me? I love my family and I want to get better, but I can't stand them. It'll be a while before I can live on my own, and I don't think I'll make it that long.

I'm so sorry.

I appreciate that you came to me, however, please remember I am not a mental health professional.

I do not have the best relationship with my family. I've come to accept that they just exist and I moved away from them. I keep a strict level of familiarity with them for my own sanity and well-being. There are people in my immediate family I don't talk to anymore or only speak to in certain situations, with other people around to buffer my emotions. No one in my family understands or respects my mental health issues and I have ceased talking about it with them.

I will admit, I had to ask for help. I'm going to share the answer of someone I trust, because they are much more level-headed when it comes to something like this.

Use different words with your sister. Instead of "I'm mad or annoyed", use words that bring out more empathy - "You're making me sad and uncomfortable. You're hurting me." Anger is usually perceived as something within you, something you must control. But sadness is usually not perceived in the same light. People usually see sadness as something that has a cause and perhaps letting her know that she is the cause will have an effect on her. Using different words when speaking to her may slowly change her perspective.

When it comes to your parents, well, parents do not usually understand sibling dynamics. They're fucking useless most of the time when it comes to problems specifically between siblings. It might be better if you say something like, "Her constant intrusions are affecting my school work. My grades are going to drop." Usually, parents respond more urgently if you say you education is affected - and it doesn't matter if it's true or not, we're just trying to get them to help in some way.

I had to remind them it's summertime lol

Oh shit, you're right. Er. Well, In any case, it seems you've tried having reasonable discussions with your parents and it doesn't seem helpful to continue discussing this particular topic with them. Maybe get into fitness since it's summertime. Go outside, do something active. She can't cuddle you if you're running, right? Then you can also be stronger and feeling better physically improves mental health. Put some music on, go hiking or running, take yourself out of the situation.

I don't know if this is possible, but perhaps if you're experiencing a mental breakdown and you're afraid of hurting your family, run out of the house? It might be better to be physically away from them at that time to avoid saying or doing anything you regret. It may help clear your head and help your family realize that this is something that is truly debilitating to you.

I don't know your age, so I don't know if the school thing is relevant. It's only a suggestion.

You said it will be a while before you can live on your own. When I knew the cons of living with my family outweighed the pros, I did everything in my power to prepare myself for leaving because I needed a goal in order to survive. I needed distractions, reading, writing, gaming, music, anything else to occupy my mind and help control my thoughts. There was a time when I needed music to fall asleep (headphones in on low volume).

Also... uh.

I'm not saying you should do this. I'm only saying I did.

My siblings and I have physically fought before. One has scars from fighting me. The scarred one is the one closest to me currently.

Not saying you should do it.

But I did.

If anyone feels comfortable enough to share how they dealt with it in their own situation, please do. Maybe more perspectives can help this person.

--

some other experiences sent to me:

anon #1

I don't think I had a situation that extreme but my brother was a little like that. I honestly had to become kinda rude and indifferent. Like he'd always use my laptop and stuff and I put passwords on everything and just don't tell him. And then when he tried to hug or cuddle id say I don't liek it and just push him away physically now this soudns fucking obvious when I say it this way but like I don't think I read that u tried it ? Idk I discovered I have a loud annoying scream that neighbours will hear, and fucking strokg legs I used to kick him away but like I was tiny so I don't really endorse violence but I didnt like being close to a 'boy' essentially at taht age so yea... Idk man siblings are weird and I have had intrusive thoughts so I think I didn't handle it well but for a few years I became an asshole to him and then now I'm good with talking sometimes and I keep it short and sweet and I've mentioned that I'm sorry for being mean in the past bcuz like I am ? Bcuz I'm not an asshole ? ( But like I did what I had to do ) I hope u get the help and support u need

anon #2

I read the message from the previous anon and I have to say I relate to what they say. I wouldn’t say i’ve completely dealt with the situation when it comes to my parents.

I have 4 siblings and i’m the oldest, my sister that’s 2 years younger than me always gets in my way and is a tyrant. Because she’s much taller than me she overpowers me and i also have scars from when we’ve fought. My parents don’t intervene because they say we’ll make up soon and I honestly can’t stay mad at people for long. I also live with my parents and am not able to move out anytime soon until I get my degree.

A few weeks ago my mother was complaining to my father that I don’t help around the house and all that bullshit but it’s obviously not true. Anyway. My father came into my room and threw all my clothes from my cupboards on the floor and said my sister and I must get out of his house. He was literally pulling us and we were crying because where the hell would we go. My smaller siblings were begging for him not to chase us out of the house but he was ballistic. He was constantly throwing insults at me, calling me selfish and disrespectful. I was having a mental breakdown and I said i hope that God takes my life away because i’m too weak to do it myself. I kept saying that and when my parents heard me. They called me crazy and were laughing at me and said i should take it back because instead of me another one of my family members would go.

My parents don’t care about mental health and therapy. It’s all unnecessary to them. But after that night I tried to find my own way of getting rid of the negative thoughts, I choose to ignore what everyone tells me. I agree with everything that you said about trying to get away from their family when they have those thoughts. I try meditation and praying. I’m not sure if that person follows any religion but that’s what helped me. And writing can be cathartic. Also remember that you’re not alone, there are so many people out there who share your sorrows and can relate to your situation. I think about my little siblings who i’m close to and what it would be like if i wasn’t there.

Maybe if they could get a pet? I know having a pet can make you feel less alone and you feel a sense of responsibility towards them. As for their sister, she needs to see their point of view and tell her that she makes her feel overwhelmed with the things she does. She can spend time with her and try to make her understand that they need their space too.

anon #3

I also have sum advice 4 the sibling anon frm a fellow bpd buddy:

Does ur view of ur sister change from "i hate her" to "she's alright" sometimes? Viewing sum1 as all bad or all good is common in bpd ppl and usually changes alot. I rec writing down the moments where she shows she loves u. This could be thru buying smth for u or doing smth 4 u. I had a similar relationship w a friend and this exercise helped me remember that she might not have intentions to hurt me and might b trying 2 bond. Repairing the relationship might take a while. Talk alot if u can, it seems like ur family is at least willing to hear u out, even if there behavior doesn't change much. Keep sum distance if needed. Working out and finding fun hobbies is good.

If u feel like ur breaking down, try breathing exercises n identify 5 things u notice thru ur senses. What do u feel? What do u smell? What do u taste? What do u see? What do u hear? I personally like taking myself down rabbit holes. For example: I see a yellow jacket > this shade of yellow is a cool tone > what makes a color "cool" or "warm" > why do we associate red with warmth > what if the sun was blue > what if ocean water looked orange > is water wet

I usually end up forgetting what was making me upset. If it was a big deal I would still remember, but at least I would b less emotional and a bit more rational.

Search up cognitive behavior therapy and dialectical behavior therapy and try 2 practice sumthing similar 2 exercises u would perform w a therapist. Squeeze stress balls. Masturbate (this blog is perfect 4 that lol). Maybe watch some videos done by therapists on youtube. I watched a couple of videos abt therapists reacting 2 fighting in movies and I learned alot (this video was very fun to watch)!

Anyway that's what helps me! Good luck 2 u!!!

[rheawritessometimes]

Ooh matchups!! I am here lol 👀

May I get a romantic matchup w one of the adult male characters?

Personality:

I come off as very friendly and sociable bc I'm too socially awkward to gracefully turn down a chat lmao. Don't get me wrong I do like talking with people but bc I'm too anxious to interrupt people when I have my own thoughts I often end up listening to the other person go on and on and it feels like they're just talking at me :/ I would very much appreciate someone who realizes this and actually pauses to ask for my opinion to make me feel included in the conversation

On the other hand, if the other person is willing to listen, I will ramble for hours about my own interests (and also go on like five tangents before I inevitably lose my original point lmao). I'm a biologist so point out any living thing to me and I'd probably have several fun facts ready to share

I almost always have a smile on my face when I'm out in public or anywhere I'd see another person. I just really don't want to come across as rude so I smile at everybody lol

This unfortunately has the side effect of making me hide my negative feelings from my friends. It's not that I'm actively trying to — if they caught me in the moment I'd at least be honest about my feelings — but I tend to push all the negativity to the back of my mind whenever I'm out with friends and only really address it when I'm alone at night. I also have a hard time showing any sort of weakness to anyone, despite my philosophy of "always talk to your friends about your problems." It's just that I'm supposed to be the one who has it together, so I feel like I have no one to go to when I need help. I'm trying to change this habit but it's been difficult lol

Likes/Dislikes:

Communication is so important to me. As someone who's very nonconfrontational I try to do all I can to avoid an argument. And honestly, being honest with each other will solve like 99% of the misunderstandings that people regularly have anyway

I love pretty much all creatures (tho my favorites are cats and also dragons even though they're not real) prob bc as a biologist, I have an appreciation for all living things and the roles they play in the world. I'm the type of person to trap the spider and bring it outside. These little critters are just trying to live like the rest of us!!

As for dislikes, I'm not a fan of jealousy in a partner. I guess some people find it hot when your s/o gets possessive of you but I'd rather just trust my partner and have them trust me? And when you do feel jealous like,, talk to your partner about what's making you uncomfortable?? Idk maybe it's just me lol

Hobbies:

I love drawing, writing, and piano!

I also love learning new things. Idk if it's really a hobby but I do enjoy adding to my collection of random trivia

Extras:

My love language is quality time and physical touch

I tend not to pay attention to my day to day life so I end up forgetting a lot of details about what happened the past few days. If someone brings it up I'd be like oh yeah that happened!! But if they were to ask me what I did last week I'd draw a blank lmao

I'm pretty sure all the tall boys in Genshin are a good head taller than me so do w that what you will lol

I absolutely make kissy faces and baby talk at cats and dogs

I tend to be pretty awkward with kids bc I don't know how to communicate with them. I can't even talk to adults who can articulate their thoughts you think I'm gonna understand children??

Dskgjsjd okay this was,, very long I'm sorry ;; but I hope it gave you a lot to work with haha!! Thank you in advance :D

I match you with...

Diluc!

Diluc is the type to regularly ask for your input and opinions when talking with you. He’s very aware of the fact that if it’s just him talking, it’s not a conversation. Even with other people, if he feels like you’ve been ignored he’ll divert the conversation to you as smoothly as possible.

Listening to you is a way to get to know you better, he’s keen to store details about your interests in his mind. Will he write them down in a hidden journal to make sure he doesn’t forget the most important parts? Maybe.

If you’re just looking to ramble about your interests to someone, he’s happy to listen to you talk while he’s doing paperwork and similar activities. His full attention may not be on you but he retains some of the details and will perk up and comment on anything that he finds particularly interesting.

The juxtaposition between smiling you and broody Diluc as you walk down the street together is *chef’s kiss*. It’s not that he’s necessarily unhappy, it’s just kind of become his neutral look over time.

I’m gonna be honest, it takes this man a while to figure out that you tend to hide your feelings. But! Once he does figure it out he regularly asks you how you feel. He just wants to check up on you and if he can help you with something that’s bothering you, he absolutely will. He doesn’t think you should rely on each other, but you should absolutely support each other.

Diluc is a very honest man, but sometimes he can be a bit blunt in expressing himself. He doesn’t mean to come across as rude or anything, but he’s not always the most delicate when using his words. Diluc would say “This is bland.” rather than, “I think we can improve this by adding some spices. :)” He usually means well, though.

Entirely indifferent to animals but if it makes you happy he will move spiders outside instead of squashing them. Even when you’re not around.

Diluc isn’t exactly the jealous type when it comes to other people giving you attention but he does absolutely take notice and is paying extra close attention if someone starts flirting with you. He gets a little more annoyed if you’re actively interacting with him when it happens, but when you’re more on your own he can’t really blame anyone for taking interest in you. Diluc won’t do anything about it and will let you handle it yourself however you see fit unless the person starts getting pushy. Mostly just concerned for your comfort and safety.

This man absolutely knows how to play the piano. If you’ll let him, he wants to listen to you play and if you play the piano with him? Makes his heart so happy, his smile will be so soft. Absolutely thinks about proposing when you play together.

Something about being in the same room as you when you’re writing or drawing and he’s reading or doing work feels so right to him. Even if you’re not interacting, peacefully spending time together while being productive is time well spent, he thinks.

You being smaller than him isn’t something he really pays much attention to. It doesn’t make much of a difference. His thoughts on it are pretty much just, Well, it does make it easier to pull you out of danger. That’s good.

Diluc feels conflicted when you’re babying animals. On one hand, he finds it very adorable. But, it is one of the only times he feels moderately jealous over the fact a cat is getting your attention and not him. He doesn’t get jealous when you spend time with other people or even when you interact with animals in any way other than this. Why does he feel like this? Nobody knows. But it’s true, I feel it in my bones.

Equally awkward if not more so with children. Luckily for him, he’s ‘weird and grumpy’ so kids don’t really seek him out much. It might even keep kids away from you when you’re with him, unless they really like you.

It wasn’t often Diluc wore a pink shirt, actually, you were pretty sure he had never worn one. You don’t recall ever seeing one on him and it was hard to imagine him going out and making the purchase. The sight was unusual enough that when you saw him wearing the pale pink button-up while looking over a few papers in his study, you couldn’t help but ask about it.

“I didn’t know you owned any pink shirts. Is it new?”

Crimson eyes flicked up from the papers in his hand to you. He placed the papers down, leaning back in his chair. You could see his cheeks turning a bit pink, too. The pause he took and his flushed face made you think he was embarrassed about it.

“One of… There was a mixup and one of your red items got mixed in with my white clothes. I don’t have any other clean button-ups at the moment,” he told you bashfully. The bit of color was different from his usual black attire, but you didn’t think it was anything for him to be quite so embarrassed about.

“It looks good,” you assured him, “Maybe you should wear pink more often.”

[fmdrohan]

hello, hi ! 👋🏽  i hope this introduction post finds everyone well. ♡ i’m no one new to these parts, but for those of you who don’t know me, you can call me alé. i’m 21+, use he/him pronouns, and i’m the current typist for aria’s main vocalist, nina seo, & now, i’m bringing you all yet another muse. so, without further delay, i’d love to introduce you to brand-new creation of mine called 𝖞𝖔𝖔 𝖗𝖔𝖍𝖆𝖓. he is knight’s main dancer, sub vocalist, and rapper, as well as their currently marketed “sexy” member. outside of his career, he’s honestly just one big douche-bag skater kid that seeks cheap thrills, and who wants to do nothing more than put a smile on your face... even if causes him trouble sometimes. more info about him is below the cut, so please like this to plot ! ♡ tumblr im’s or discord by request.✨ 

𝖍𝖎𝖘𝖙𝖔𝖗𝖞.

born in seoul, south korea, to a working class, christian family.

mom was a manager at a local restaurant, dad worked at a law firm.

both of them were busy all the time; they lived paycheck-to-paycheck.

he didn’t get much attention at home, so he sought it out at school.

there, he was known as a a huge “class clown” or “class daredevil.”

all he wanted was to put smiles on people’s faces and push limits.

did he end up in the principal’s office a lot? YES, that was his “brand.”

as he got older, his class clownery turned to pranks and thrill-seeking.

he also became HELLA interested in skateboarding and parkour lmao.

rohan felt as if he wasn’t living if he wasn’t on constantly on the edge.

he’s broken a few bones, endured tons of scrapes, but never gives in

this, obviously, didn’t please his mother and father... they were just busy.

too busy to reprimand him and care—rohan got away with a loooot of shit.

he didn’t start receiving discipline until he was scouted by bc entertainment.

despite his messy hair, distinct style, and overall vibe, he fit the bill somehow.

the two years he spent in practice changed him a little as a person; for better.

he found a new love in dancing, and he was naturally pretty great at it tbh.

his background made him extremely coordinated, flexible, and really strong.

his fearlessness made him bold enough to try out new moves or stunts.

two years later, he débuted as a main dancer and kept his impulses at bay.

this isn’t exactly what he saw himself doing in life, but he wasn’t mad at it.

over time, his image began to shift into sexier and “stud-lier” territory.

his outfits became more revealing and he was treated differently in public.

this... fucks him up a lot because it’s the exact opposite of how he is.

he’s just some skater / parkour punk that gives off dumb big bro vibes.

how on earth do they expect him to be portray and convey sexy 24/7?

as this is more of a “job” to him than passion, he does what they tell him to.

so long as his checks get signed and he accumulates wealth, he’s good.

𝖕𝖊𝖗𝖘𝖔𝖓𝖆𝖑𝖎𝖙𝖞.

as mentioned above, rohan gives off very douchey “big brother” vibes.

he’ll pick on you, tease you, pull pranks on you, etc. all in the name of fun.

he’ll go too far sometimes, and he’ll feel bad, but has “no regrets.” 😎  lol.

lowkey loooves anime and draws his own bad sketches; also into sci-fi.

underneath the dumb, douchebag exterior is just a big ol’ nerd, that’s all.

if you’re a cute guy, he’ll DEFINITELY flirt with you—taken or not taken lol.

he’s someone that hasn’t really let being an idol ruin his personal life tbh??

he still does whatever the fuck he wants within the constraints of his contract.

though, whenever he gets “bored,” he does things he’s not supposed to.

bc entertainment’s warned him of being careful not to injure himself, but...

i don’t really think he cares at this point in his career; he likes more freedom.

little random, but he loooves underground / indie rock music and rap, too.

one of those assholes that doesn’t really listen to any other idol music lmao.

to be fair though, he’s not really a massive fan of knight’s music either. 😁

he just sings or raps whatever they tell him to and rolls with the punches.

lowkey wants to take up tattooing and graffiti at some point, he’s that guy.

loooves to talk and meet new people, even if they find him a li’l annoying.

whenever he’s stressed, angry, upset, hungry... he shows it with aggression.

it’s never gotten intense much, but he’s not much of a sensitive “crier” yk.

there’s more of him for me to discover as time goes on, so that’s it for rn!

𝖕𝖑𝖔𝖙-𝖑𝖎𝖓𝖊𝖘.

no plots page yet, sry :/// i’ve been a little busy this week rip.

some ideas will be below though so lmk if they appeal to you!

one, he’s definitely known to ghost people, so... maybe your muse is one of ‘em? like, this would be locked to males in the lgbt community, but you know. give him some really awkward encounters to make him feel like shit for ditching you after tons of sweet talk. sad thing is, he’s aware of it, and it’s mostly because of his schedule, but also ??? he’s just having fun, you know. he doesn’t wanna get tied down to anything right now.

two, maybe that ONE GIRL he tried to fuck with at the beginning of his career. while he knows he’s always been attracted to men, i think he would’ve convinced himself to at least try it out with a woman to make sure he wasn’t also interested in them, too. he’s a MASSIVE flirt and sweet talker, definitely made her feel special, but like... it never really went anywhere because... he just wasn’t into it, but didn’t wanna make her mad lmao. clearly ended up in a break-up and it could be both an ugly or pretty ending imo idk.

three, i’d DIE if other muses in famed were super into skating, or anime, or really any of his interests, too, and they’ve formed a “club” of sorts? just your local band o’ dirtbags who get together and fuck shit up a little bit here and there. i feel like this could be open to anyone who shares any of his interests tbh ??? maybe closer to his age is preferred, but honestly, i’m here to discuss whatever! i’m all for compromises and shit tbh.

four, maybe someone’s he’s lowkey seeing ( male, male-presenting lock ) that he’s really vibing with, but he just can’t... feasibly reason why he should have a bf right now. he’s got a lot going on, so he’s kind of a flake, but at the same time, he doesn’t intend to be an asshole to them. they’re maybe one of the only people he’s “softer” with. can end up romantic or platonic depending on how they handle it together, me thinks!

five, a dance partner or two would be pretty cool tbh! he’s not a dancer first, so he likes to dance with other people who are passionate about it to learn from ‘em. he can handle his own with choreography, but doesn’t have his own distinct style, so he’d really appreciate all the help he can get in becoming better ig? all in the name of work!

six, maybe a person who fucking HAAAATES him because they find him really annoying and super douchey, so they just... avoid him at all costs. however, he kinda picks up on the fact that they avoid him, so he pesters them even worse, which doesn’t end well... ever. this is definitely more open to anyone tbh and we can plan as we go!

seven, flipside where it’s someone that he CAN’T stand because he finds them really persnickety, snobby, and rude as fuck. if there’s one thing he hates A LOT, it’s bratty rich kids with silver spoons in their mouths. like, if this was a “the outsiders” verse, he’d be a greaser 1000000%, not a soc. lmao. he’d butt-heads with this person a fuck-ton.

eight, however many guys wanna piece of him, he’s happy to have a catalogue of fwb’s he calls on. he’s definitely not someone who says no to a good time, and he can act like a perfect boyfriend if that’s what you want. sadly, this’ll always be a temporary game. any of these fwb’s can go in many directions and can be plotted out individually!

nine, the age old question... “who’s your ideal type?” under pressure, he said you as a joke ( because of this, it could be male or female ) and now, fans of your respective groups ship you two together all the time. it’s a little awkward, and you two haven’t really talked about it much, but here you are... at a shared event sitting next to each other. how do you handle it? what do you do? is it awkward or all in good fun?

ten, someone who kinda hates that he doesn’t really take being an “idol” all the serious. he’s got a lot of shit on his bucket list he wants to do and he doesn’t let fame fuck with that, so he’s careless. he didn’t go into this business because of passion, it’s just where he ended up. your muse doesn’t like that, and thinks people like him are lazy as fuck.

[mochuelovelli]

Lilith for the character ask?

Oh boy, a controversial character! Gotta say, I stan James Charles /J

How do I feel about this character?:

On a real note, I do like Lilith as a character. When we first meet her, she's pompous and proud. Oozing with entitlement, she's easy to route against and you like to see her get worked up and "brought down" to Eda's level as the wild which so eloquently put it. Later on, but not too much later that it feels disingenuous, we really get to see her show that she cares for her sister. One might believe it is *Eda* being ridiculous, as far as the audience is aware, Lilith's offer holds little downsides. Eda would be cured and be afforded the luxuries of the upper class AND keep her magic. All she had to do was be the Emperor's soldier.

As to not get off track by talking about Eda, (im sure Lilith herself would loathe that lol) Lilith's reveal to have cursed her sister over a spot in the emperor's coven was...controversial to say the least. I don't think it's unpopular to voice that, yeah. It could've been communicated better to the audience since I saw plenty of commentators and regular fans themselves either thought Lilith cursing her sister was *needlessly* petty and not at all thought out (which yeah it kinda was).

From where I stand on that issue is, yeah, Lilith's whole reason to curse her sister could've been avoided by just talking to her sister and asking her to let her have this. BUT, I think a lot of people forget that the Emperor's coven would want to limit the number of powerful witches in their coven. Sure, Belos would want to be protected by a bunch of loyal soldiers, but he wouldn't want too much of the population to ever have a much power as him. So limiting the number of members in not just his coven but possible in the other major covens, would aid in controlling that population.

This might be pure hogwash but like, there are a ton of other "lesser" covens. So in my mind, it's more likely that the general population of witches gets sorted into one of the various miscellaneous. If you think limiting yourself to only practicing Illusion magic sucks, imagine only practicing whatever the fuck the "swag coven" does.

Lol gonna add a page break this shit is getting too long

Romantic Ships for this character?:

Hm, it's only s1 and we haven't seen her interact w/ many characters outside of her fam/Belos/actual children. I kinda jokingly ship here with Steve lol. Kikimora and her also have a funny dynamic but in all actuality, I don't ship her w/ anyone rn.

Non-Romantic Ships for this character?:

Her and Hooty lol. I mean Eda is an obvious answer but like, Hooty fucking with Lilith is too funny to not want to see. Her and King would be great too, probably get some good B plots out of it. It would be a good contrast since they both can be petty but in different ways and I think that would help flesh out their characters a bit more and maybe cause some introspection (at least on Lilith’s end lol)

Unpopular opinion about this character?:

Lol. I feel like she is such a divisive character in general that most opinions about her aren’t too out of the main stream. I guess a more meta take is that when she’s portrayed in fanworks, usually fanfic but not exclusively, very...one note lol. She’s usually a pretty flat, boring character in an attempt to highlight the contrast between her and Eda. She’s the straight-laced, “responsible” sibling who has a chip on her shoulder. In fanon, that equates to her characterization to either be like, completely and utterly apologetic to the point where it becomes unbelievable for any person to do. Her apologizing or making amends is usually quickly forgiven by Luz/and or Eda. Sure, Luz is very forgiving person naturally but like?? She’s wasn’t mad in canon too much about THEIR well being (almost getting impaled), she was specifically pissed about Lilith betraying Eda. 

So, if Lilith is a big part of your story (and it’s working in the realm of canon), then this should be a problem which doesn’t get resolved by just ONE big action. I also feel like her being on better terms with Eda would come BEFORE Luz since Eda’s main gripe with her would be about her being annoyed by Lilith’s controlling nature and the fact that she didn’t trust her enough to talk about her feelings back when she was first cursed (also her using Luz against her but I feel like that would probably be a hurdle that wouldn’t really be over come until Lilith in turn would be willing to sacrifice herself for Luz while also making an effort to care for Luz as a person not just see her as a “pet”). Hhhh this section is so long and its kinda bleeding over in the next question so-

Something I wish will happen or would have wanted to happen in canon?:

yall if you are still reading I am so sorry sksk

I want Lilith in general, not to be forgiven by either Luz or Eda. Eda probably early on stating about how she is unsure if she could EVER forgive her sister for what she has done. BUT, critically, Eda would see that Lilith is trying and she is willing to work with her (with a unhelpful dose of teasing) because at the end of the day she still loves her sister. For the relationship they had before everything with south, for knowing her side of the story even though she believes it doesn’t justify her actions. She understands and sympathizes, she’s grown a bit softer thanks to Luz, which is very funny since I want Luz to be the one who is the hardest to convince Lilith actually had a change of heart but more on that later. 

Before I move on to what I want her path towards forgiveness with Luz looks like, I want to bring up a parallel that I haven’t seen many people make. Fans always talk about the parallel between the Clawthornes and Luz/Amity, and rightly so because there is a lot to extrapolate there, but I think another interesting dynamic that might be interesting to see in s2 would be an episode that focuses on lost friendship/sisterhood with the Clawthornes and Amity and Willow. It’s kinda funny that Amity and Willow’s friendship was ruined because Willow was too “weak” while Eda was too “powerful”. In a potential episode, it can show the progression both Eda/Lilith and Willow/Amity are making in rekindling their relationship with each other. For Eda and Lilith this would be a lot more rough around the edges since it both be either the first or one of the first attempts at doing so while Willow/Amity would maybe be further along yet still have some major/minor hang ups with one another. With Willow/Amity, their relationship would either be rounding the bend of fully moving past the “idk how to feel about you stage” or it is stated outright that Willow forgives Amity, (and by forgive, I mean in the “we both know what you did, you’ve actually changed. we won’t have the same relationship that we once had but I’m okay with trying again”). In contrast, Lilith and Eda would reach a understanding and come up with some ground rules on how to handle each other (Eda’s main take away from this “episode” would be what I previously stated in the last question), ones that will be more like guidelines cuz its Eda lol. Also what separates the Clawthornes conflict from the Willow/Amity one (besides the obvious) is that the Clawthornes both know how the other works. Which buttons to push and all that so both of them are going to have to learn to resist doing that, at least a bit, in order to actually progress. 

ANYWAYS, I also want Luz to be the one to regard Lilith the coldest. Luz refusing to let Lilith teach her anything despite probably having more practical/book smarts knowledge on magic theory than Eda because she doesn’t trust her. If they are gonna use that masked dude as a spy, I want Luz to assume Lilith is somehow a coconspirator. This plot thread doesn’t have to be going at 100% the whole time, (in fact I would want it to be a temp thing maybe lasting a couple eps at most or like, just something that is hinted at but not dived deeply until the second half of the season). Really, Lilith has a hard time because Luz straight up doesn’t give her the opportunity to really express her regret/remorse. Lilith probably won’t at first give her a ton of reasons to forgive her as she usually attempts at coming back at Luz’s snide remarks with her own quippy comebacks. Sksk a really angsty end to an attempt could include Lilith saying something to Luz after going on a small talk with her (where yeah Lilith has improved but still needs noticeable work) that she “reminds her a lot of Eda” and Luz bites back with something like “Oh yeah? You going to curse me too? You want another person you can force to do what YOU want?”. 

Hell maybe “parental problems” could have Lilith poke at, either on purpose or accidentally, Luz’s feelings about going back to the human world and Camila. Lilith reminding her, maybe unknowingly, reminds her a lot of her mom and that causes her to blow up on her. Luz would hate that comparison, thinking about how similar her mom and Lilith are to one another. That because she still has such a strong dislike of Lilith, it bleeds over into how Luz views Camila and vice versa. In that, both Camila and Lilith value respect, an adherence to the rules, have a great sense of wisdom (arguably for Lilith lol /hj), and (eventually for Lilith once she gets to know Luz better) a genuine want for Luz to succeed and belief in her even though they are critical of her actions at times. Sure Eda reminds her of that more, motherly protective kind of love, in which she would do anything for her to be happy and healthy. Lilith can be the other side of that, the worry and slight doubt. That familiar way they each go about trying to understand and get close to Luz yet not quite getting it yet would still do whatever she’d ask for her sake. Luz at first would take Lilith being disappointed in her actions as an accomplishment. As they grow closer and the more Lilith reminds her of her mom, it becomes scary. The disappointment hurts and in an effort not to feel like that again and to not want to think about the comparison between Lilith and her mother she will snap back at her. Eventually Lilith would then have to change again and reassure her that she cares and by extent, her mother cares to. It is here Lilith is willing to let go of being so constantly controlling and learns to encourage first (or do some form of the compliment sandwich) and Luz comes to peace with her feelings about her mother and understands her position better. To be able to love herself even if she knows that she will always try to do her best. 

oh my fucking god you made it im so sorry i guess i had a lot of thoughts. fffffff

[jyndor]

I swear, WHY are these people harassing MINORS. The atla fandom is mostly adults at this point, that they're SEARCHING KIDS OUT is just so absolutely disgusting. Those kids got to miss the initial ship wars, let them go through 2020 in peace.

Anon I feel you. Full disclosure, I have had a bottle of wine and spent four hours talking to my family on zoom so I’m heated. Okay, here we go. Let me say this. I am 29 and neurodivergent/ADHD so I prefer explicitly-stated social rules of engagement. Like I don’t always pick up on social cues and that has gotten me into interpersonal conflicts in the past with my peers.

BUT. I am 29 so I also understand that I am in a different place than I was when I was 15 or 12 or 17. I have different needs, different expectations, from those who interact with me than I did when I was a kid. Fuck, I know how it might have felt back 15 years ago to hear adults say “she’s a kid, she doesn’t know what she needs, her brain isn’t fully developed and she can’t legally consent” yeah that pissed me off and in some ways it wasn’t true but with regard to consent it was. Of course it was. But what I’m hearing from these minors, these teenagers who I don’t know if they’re 12 or 17, but they’re not asking to be treated like adults - they’re asking to be treated with respect.

Now all of what I am about to say is not me excusing this behavior, but analyzing why it happens. And yes, I am about to say that all of these anons are white I can smell the entitlement in the air.

I know why these fools are targeting minors and poc zutara shippers. I know why. You know why. We all know. They are EASY fucking targets. It’s sick, picking on kids. Absolutely sick. Harassment, predatory. And they are also acting in bad faith - if they were working in good faith, they would come off anon and say, “hey x I truly believe that zutara is harmful and I am confused as to why a poc would be cool with something that other poc say is harmful to them, can we have a discourse?” now granted, this is fucked up and essentialist garbage, and no one is entitled to discourse~ with random people on social media.

Now I want to make something clear before I get to my next bit: the zutara fandom is not the r*ylo fandom. First off, the zutara fandom has experienced hateful shit from TPTB since early on in fandom; we don’t have a lot of support from the creators. In fact, the creators have been outwardly misogynistic and hostile to us. Okay, Dante Basco and some of the writers MIGHT ship zutara but that’s like, not institutional support. And also there is a history of SOME fan creations being really fucking racist. That shit, the “dark enemies hate sex” shit that zutara is stereotyped as being about, is almost completely purged from fandom. Not that it doesn’t exist still. And not that it shouldn’t be corrected and that we shouldn’t try to grow as a fandom. Have I seen shitty politics from zutara shippers? Yes. And I cringe every time, but like I don’t expect every person to agree with my politics. We have grown so much as a fandom - and you can tell by the fan creations. Fanworks are not about non-consensual domination anymore (like they often were in the early days of atla), they are about respect and reconciliation. And they have been for YEARS, like I’m talking s2 onward, when zutara took off. *sips wine*

‘cause here’s the thing. Fandoms are groups of people. People, as a result of centuries-old imperialist/racist constructs, are racist. We have to actively unlearn so fucking much. And any fandom is going to have its shitty elements. This is not something non-zutara shippers are exempt from. Actually, the zutara fandom has done a lot of work to make the fandom safe for poc and minors over the years and I am so proud of it. I have never seen that in a fandom. Ever. It’s not to say it’s perfect, of course not.

We did that on our own. Not because kataangers or sokka/zuko shippers were like WTF RACIST lol no because poc in the fandom were like, HEYYY before you write capture fic please learn about x, y and z, and the white parts of fandom were like, oh shit let’s get educated, this ship is about reconciliation and growth, let’s live up to that. I mean honestly from what I’ve seen from the larger atla fandom, which has a hard time dealing with the criticisms about why atla is racist (lol shocking that bryke appropriating cultures for their financial benefit would be considered racist but /s) could learn from the zutara fandom. js.

Honestly I assume most of these anons are just fuckin white asshole anti-zutara trolls who have never actually interacted with the zutara fandom. As a white person I do think that we white people have a certain level of entitlement to spaces that are not ours. Like, I don’t see poc who have had to be in more collectivist or communal settings as a result of colonialism and white supremacy invading spaces they don’t belong to in the same way that white people do. This is a LEARNED behavior, not an essence or in our DNA. Like, many white people get pissy about not being allowed by social contract to say certain slurs, but like... A) it’s not a legally enforced LAW lmfao and B) those white people only get annoyed when they realize they aren’t allowed to say it. That’s an extreme example, but I think it’s emblematic of a larger problem - because of colonialist ideology, white people feel entitled to ALL spaces and ALL things. We get annoyed when things don’t work how we feel they should. I grew up expecting things to change when my social class put pressure on those things, so it is always going to be somewhat jarring for me to know that that isn’t the case for marginalized communities.

I know some of my friends who are black have said things like, “lol cait why are you so shocked and appalled that x is the way it is, that’s how it always has been.” Not always, and not all of my friends, but like it happens. In those instances it’s like, I see something happen that is racist or fucked up, and they’re like... yeah. Obviously. But for someone who is not exposed to something, they might find it hard to swallow. When it comes to fascists and capitalists, I don’t have any sympathy left to offer - just get fucking educated or have a fist to the nose. But ships are not at that level. And like people work with political bubbles, where they often get isolated to what discourse is happening in other bubbles, fandoms and subfandoms (like ship fandoms) also exist in bubbles. (I am not saying that fascists/capitalists are soul searching in their bubbles, but they do exist in clear bubbles on and offline and that is terrifying to me; their discourse cannot be GOOD and I hate not knowing what they are plotting).

Example. I don’t interact with r*ylo unless it interacts with ME, and what I see, I don’t like. (let me be clear, I am not comparing zutara with r*ylo because they are NOT equivalent; I would not be a zutara shipper if I thought they were similar). But I don’t go into shipper tags and harass children who support r*ylo. I hate it, I really do it fucking sends me up a wall, but I only ever interact with anti-r*ylo content. and in that way, I don’t know what discourse the r*ylo fandom is doing to correct its horseshit. I only know what I see, and I see r*ylo shippers being toxic and racist.

So I hate fucking r*ylo but you don’t see me going out of my way to interact with r*ylos about their ship. I can’t begin to tell you how much I am ANTI-r*ylo. It is antithetical to everything I believe. But again, I am not going into the tags, searching for r*ylos to harass. Maybe the r*ylo fandom is working on its toxic shit, maybe it isn’t. I have no idea, and I am not going to harass r*ylos about it in their inboxes unless they come into my inbox and harass me. And by the way, even then I am not going to have private conversations with shitty people - that’s all gonna be public, bitch.

Wow... IDK if this is coherent because like I said, wine. At best, these anons are racist white people who think that they are helping the anti-racist cause by attacking people who they think are pushing racist narratives... but are not challenging their implicit biases and so are picking on the most vulnerable people, who because of essentialist garbage, they feel like are traitors of the Cause or whatever, and also are minors so they assume are incapable of fighting back.

It’s racism, my friend. I’m drunk, but it’s racism. Hopefully I don’t have much to edit in this tomorrow morning lmfao. Please tell me if anything doesn’t make sense.

[radiosandrecordings]

Lowkey hate it whenever a podcast gets popular enough to enter kinda public consciousness... Like rn tma is getting so mainstream that it's getting labeled annoying and cringe, almost thr same happened with taz balance and i feel like wolf 359 was close. idk call me gatekeeper or whatever but i think im so used to podcast fandoms being such a tight circle it's throwing me off so hard that people outside that know the show and have opinions lol

I absolutely get where you’re coming from, anon, because I tend to think like that a lot, but recently I’ve been trying to cut that kind of thinking out of myself

Do I miss when the TMA fandom was a lot quieter and you felt like everyone knew everyone? Yes absolutely. I’ve been into audio dramas for. Three and a half? Years now and it something that felt so personal before. Sure, everyone liked Night Vale but it felt personal. It was for the weird queer 14 year olds who needed to feel at home somewhere. Penumbra, Bright Sessions, every other thing I listened to had the same kind of vibe to it of community. And TMA feels a little like it blew everything out of the water with how popular it got.

But I also am a person who wants to work in audio. So, I know, logically, it’s idiotic of me to be angry that more people are accepting it as a medium just because I want to feel like I’m in a clique. Those are my future listeners I’m trying to bar the way of. So really I should be pushing the door open and going ‘please, come in, sit, stay a while. If you liked this show, maybe try mine?’

Also I adore Rusty Quill as a company and am so glad they’re doing as well as they are. The popularity of TMA has done so much for them, people who worked SO HARD with very little for so long. Now they can branch out and do other things and be the phenomenal thing they deserve to be.

So do I agree with you anon? Yeah pretty much. But I think the popularity, as much as it might irk me, is definitely a more positive than negative

[draculaurennn]

PRERELATIONSHIP -Liona General – Cullida Love – McJunk Domestic Life - Fuujiro

S— SHIP QUESTIONS @silverblighted

PRE-RELATIONSHIP — Liona .

How did they first meet? Siona was locked in a crumbling temple under the deserts sands and best girl Nova found her! And then Link and Gan cornered them like 10 minutes after they escaped.

What was their first impression of each other? For like 5 min Link thought she was actually tricking them that she wasn’t an evil mage, and then she passed out, and he was like “ok maybe not.” Siona’s first impression was like 2 hours later when she woke back up and she thought he was really nice!

Did any of their friends or family want them to get together? Link’s fam really did not! But Siona’s only family is Nova and she did. 

Who felt romantic feelings first? Uhhhh... I think technically Siona did, but only because she thought meeting a prince like that is really romantic and was probably just projecting that ideal on him a little bit. But either way they’re both idiots smitten within 24 hours so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Did either of them try to resist their feelings? Siona does, a few times. She does because she has to go home, she does because she thinks she has to return to the Twilight Realm alone, and she does because she doesn’t think the way her story is playing out that she’ll be allowed to stay with Link. I think Link probably did for like one week and then decided it’s not worth it to try resisting people you care deeply about. 

If you had told one of them that the other would be their soulmate, what would they think? asdfghjhgfd this one’s so hard UHHHHHH i think Link would think that’s pretty fuckin swell and makes sense if it goes hand in hand with finding a lost princess in the desert, and i think Siona would say that’s not a thing but she’d be super jazzed bc she’s an idiot romantic too. 

GENERAL — Cullida .

Who initiated the relationship, and how did it go? It’d ultimately be left up to Cullen, I think. I think Cressida wouldn’t have been afraid to tell him she was waiting on him to tell her when he was ready, but I don’t think she would have ever pushed it after that. So it was probably Cullen, and it was probably right after her dumb ass almost died after Haven. Went great, though, even if she was groggy and turned around. Cressida would have probably told him it was about time LOL

Did they have an official first date? If so, what was it like? As official as you can get when you’re in the Inquisition, I guess. I don’t even know if they count things as dates? Just nice outings with each other away from their jobs and duties. More than likely it was a nice trip to a lake to sit and chat and have a picnic and not worry about busy places and other people. 

What was their first kiss like? Their technical first kiss is in the alternate reality nightmare with Dorian, and Cressida tried kissing a red lyrium-corrupted Cullen to get through to him. For her, that was a first, but it was awful, and not even in their reality, so it doesnt really count. Their actual first kiss was in Haven right before she ran off to help Vesta, bc I think they were both pretty sure they were just doing to die there LOL. 

Were they each other’s first anything (kiss, relationship, etc.)? Cressida is Cullen’s first-pretty-much-everything. I guess technically Cullen is Cressida’s first (and only) husband, which she’s pretty glad about. 

What’s their height difference? Age difference? Cullen’s about a foot taller than Cressida, and nine years her senior. 

What’s their relationship with each other’s families? Cressida’s family is... almost totally horrible. Her dad is dead, so no relation for Cullen there, and her mother is a monster of a woman who abused the hell out of her sister. Vesta is awkward with Cullen but I think she’s grown to like him over time. (Not enough to tell him, but enough to be supportive I think LOL). They’re cordial enough and can be in a room alone, even if they don’t talk a lot.  Cullen’s family is so many sisters and a brother, and they all love Cressida. Cressida was panicked to meet them; she doesn’t panic meeting anyone, but she was really worried they wouldn’t like her bc she doesn’t think she, as a genuine person, is a likable person. She was also worried they’d think she was too pompous and shallow because she just doesn’t do field work. But they really like her bc she’s earnest and forthright and tries, even if she’s awful at menial field tasks. And they joke she’s too pretty for Cullen, so that’s always a plus. 

Who takes the lead in social situations? Cressida. Hands down. It’s what she’s good at, it’s what she lives for, and it probably annoys some people that she has to open her mouth, but she commands a situation very well and in her mind, that’s how it should be. Cullen’s p fine w that though bc he doesn’t love social situations and he’d rather do his own job and be left alone.

Who gets jealous easier? Uhhh, probably Cullen. Cress doesn’t make that easy for him bc she’s flirty and commanding and winds people around her fingers to get her way. I think there’s been a few times early on where he wasn’t even sure she genuinely liked him or not bc she can pay fake attention and admiration so convincingly even to people she doesn’t like. Cressida’s also... like, so obnoxiously confident in her own outward personality but also so incredibly convinced by how much Cullen loves her (once she knows) that I don’t think she ever worries about him vying after someone else. (Although, she did get pretty upset and tilted with the Warden Surana hanging around since she knows about that LMAO.) 

LOVE — McJunk .

Who said “I love you” first? Jesse. He said it a few times. Jun-ki’s kinda mean, though; I’m pretty sure she told him no he doesn’t a few times? Idk, he’s too nice for this bitch.

What are their primary love languages? Jesse’s is pet names and touch both. He’s not really shy so he can express it in a lot of ways. Jun’s is small gestures, like sitting with someone while they’re struggling. I guess her other one is also literally fighting people for him even tho he definitely probably did not ask LOL. 

How often do they cuddle/engage in PDA? All the time. All the fucking time. Their coworkers hate them. Think April and Andy, and then multiply. (And Jun literally would spit her gum in this man’s mouth just to annoy other people.) 

What are their favorite things to do together? They do... so much together uhhhh sdfghj idk, I know Jun likes doing most things with Jesse around now. Movie nights, pizza dates, annoying PDA, drinking games, weird places to fuck... they’re a little inseparable. I think the only thing Jun doesn’t like to do with Jesse around is upgrade sessions with Angela because she doesn’t want to be seen all broken up, and training segments because she doesn’t want to be responsible for him getting hurt. 

Who’s better at comforting the other? Jesse. Jun’s never been good at it. He says what he thinks she needs to hear without impressing on her a bunch of psychology she never said she had. He’s just good at offering her something to relate to and a shoulder to lean on. Jun’s not very good with words, though, so she’s not very good at or sure how to offer comfort when someone needs it, especially Jesse. But she just says she’ll hang around and if they fight about it she just says to shut up and deal with it. He’s usually better once he vents.

Who’s more protective? BIG DEBATABLE. I think it’s pretty... even. I think either of them will fight as hard as they can for the other, though I think Jun may be the only one more likely to throw herself into actual harm’s way, and that’s just because she’s definitely the more reckless of the two. 

Do they prefer verbal or physical affection? Jesse’s a more verbal person but I think physical affection and affirmation is where they’ve connected. No one has to say anything, he just does, but it’s just the cherry to the rest of it and physical communication and affection is more than enough for both of them. 

What are some songs that apply to their relationship, in-universe or otherwise? THERE”S A WHOLE BUNCH ON THE SPOTIFY LET ME TELL UUUUU BUT THE BEST ARE OFF THE TOP OF MY HEAD “Something About Us” by Daft Punk “Amphetamine” by MNQN and also I could add matchbox 20 but i’m not tryna get roasted

What kind of nicknames do they call each other? Yikes. Uhhhhh, Jesse’s partial to: darlin’, sweetie, sweet pea, sweet bean, juniper berry, junnie b jones, jun-bug, and the list goes onnn.  Jun’s partial to cowboy and (affectionately) dumbass. 

DOMESTIC LIFE — Fuujiro .

If they get married, who proposes? Probably Shinjiro, and it was probably something stupid and weird at the grocery store. 

What’s the wedding like? Who attends? Small, probably at a park or something, but all of their friends. They don’t have a lot, but that’s what makes it nice. I think they’d be more interested in spending money on travelling afterwards than trying to make a big deal out of a celebration.

How many kids do they have, if any? What are they like? I don’t think they have any kids. I don’t think Fuu has any interest in bringing a kid into the world bc of the shit she’s gone through on her end; there’s no innate part of her that thinks she needs to have a kid to raise them better just to make up for how alone and neglected she was as a child. If they wound up with any kids, it’d probably be some circumstantial adoption of a wayward orphan they kept coming, honestly? A mentorship or personal attachment just kind of developing, really. Like Denzel LMAO. That’s the only thing I could see happening really asdfgh.

Do they have any pets? THEY HAVE KOROMARU. Otherwise, I think they just put food and shelter boxes out for their neighbourhood cats. Shinjiro probably lets them in a lot. 

Who’s the stricter parent? Shinjiro, hands down. He was the stricter parent when he was a teenager. Fuu is/ would be the parent who is also being scolded.

Who kills the bugs in the house? Shinjiro kills them and Fuu takes them outside. Shinjiro just doesn’t think bugs belong in the house, and Fuu thinks killing them is bad luck. If he kills them before she gets to take them outside, they probably “fight” about it, but it’s not a divisive convo that’ll sour the day.  

How do they celebrate holidays? Shinjiro’s not really a holiday person and Fuu’s really busy, but I know she thinks they’re worth doing. So everything’s probably pretty quiet and half-decourated for. Holidays with events to go to that they don’t have to prepare for, like festivals, Fuu definitely nags to attend. Things like Christmas, I think they just plan on nice dinners and quiet evenings. 

Who’s more likely to convince the other to come back to sleep in the morning? Ooh, uhhhhh asdfg that’s hard. Probably Shinjiro? I don’t think he tries often, but he is the one more likely to sleep late. I guess it’d be circumstantial, in a lot of ways. Like if he wasn’t sleeping a lot lately, Fuu would sleep late to try and keep him around. If Fuu’s overworking, Shinjiro would try to bait her back. But otherwise, it’s probably Shinjiro, since she’s usually up early because she wants to run early.

Who’s the better cook? Shinjiro, hands down. Fuu’s okay at it; if she has to make dinner, she’s happy to do it and it’d be fine food, it just wouldn’t be anything exciting or special. She understands basic seasoning laws and how to use a rice cooker. Shinjiro’s the one who’s anal-retentive about produce quality, technique, prepwork, etc. He’s the one who literally watches home cooking network and considers buying a separate pasta cooker, after all. It’s one of the few things he’s really passionate about, and he’s always emphasized how important a good meal and diet are to health with the idiots he hangs around. 

[jamaisjoons]

(1/7) I'm sorry this is going to be super long, so if you actually answer this I'll be so thankful lol... idk how much experience you have in relationships and sexuality and whatnot but I just really need to ask someone about this and you seem super friendly and nice so I wanted to ask you, and if anyone else reading this ask wants to give me advice I'd love and appreciate that as well - I'll keep an eye on the comments 💜 So I've been in a relationship for over 5 years now. I want to preface

this ask is incredibly long and if therefore the rest, along with my response, is under the read more!

(2/7) this with saying that I'm not unhappy with my relationship overall. And I honestly do prioritize emotional connection over physical, but this is something that's been on my mind recently, especially since I started getting into reading fanfics and learning more about how diverse and explorative someone can be with sexuality. My current boyfriend was my first serious relationship so I never experienced anyone else sexually. And I know stories romanticize, dramatize, and exaggerate things

(3/7) so I don't expect that I should be able to experience my sex life exactly as its portrayed in the fictions I read. I've been generally content with my sex life with my boyfriend, while maybe not fully satisfied but content. But lately its been bothering me. I've always had a higher drive than him so I don't mind needing to... take care of myself most days and just have sex whenever he's up for it. (Although he gets whiny if I'm not up for it the day he is, which I guess is partly fair

(4/7) since there's only like 2 days a month I'm not horny lol). And I do tend to take quite a bit longer to uh... well, cum, than he does as well so I've never really taken any offense to him not trying super hard to get me there. Lately it has been bothering me though... he does give effort to it most of the time but gives up because he has trouble getting the right spots and/or it takes a long time (and yeah I chalk that up to female anatomy being more complicated than male so while it is

(5/7) disappointing, I excuse it because of that) But it bothers me because I feel like I try to push myself more to figure out what he likes and try different things out of my comfort zone more than he does for me. (i.e. I've recently started trying to get used to anal even though so far its painful and I haven't found pleasure in it yet because it's something he's always wanted to do). He also loves blow jobs and always wants one - kind of expects it and gets disappointed if I tell him I don't

(6/7) want to that day and sometimes (most of the time) tries to push it, even though I don't push him if he doesn't want to go down on me. I've more or less given up on trying to cum when we have sex, just kind of settled on enjoying it for a while and helping him and then finishing myself off after. I'll sometimes ask him to help afterwards, and he'll help with some stimulation like nipple play and stuff for a bit, but if he's already gotten his release I feel like he treats it like a chore.

(7/7) It's just been bothering me more and more lately. I'm worried about talking to him about it because idk if I'm just being needy or if he'll be offended or upset. And I don't really know how to fix it anyway so idk how to bring it up or any solutions to offer but since its been bothering me more I don't want to just leave it as it is. Do you have any advice for me? Also I'm SO SORRY for the novel and going probably too detailed into my sex life... I hope this wasn't bothersome or annoying!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

i’m gonna preface this with im not a professional and any advice i give is based on my own feelings and thoughts and based on experiences of my own and they won’t be the same as yours! please take caution reading/heeding any of my advice because really i’m not any different to you and i have no real qualifications for giving out sexual advice.

so honestly speaking, i have a fear of commitment and trust issues and as a result i don’t very often partake in committed relationships (i’ve been willingly and happily single for YEARS) - and my previous ones weren’t all that good either (my last two ended with cheating rip). but i’m happy to help in any way possible and it means a lot that you feel like you can speak to me about this!

Okay so, my first point is that sex is honestly diverse and yes its always mindblowing in fics, but in reality its not always the case. sometimes sex is bland, sometimes its really good, and sometimes you don’t really enjoy yourself (not in a bad or nonconsensual way, but more it doesn’t leave you as fulfilled as it could and it just feels,,,, meh for a lack of better word for it). that being said, considering you’ve been in a relationship for a long time and it’s your first and (i assume only? sexual partner) i can potentially see why its just been a case of contentment and not real fulfilment - especially, since it seems you haven’t really been communicating and taking each other’s feelings into consideration? well him more so than you.

Side point, he really shouldn’t be whining if you don’t want to have sex but as long as he’s not pressuring you into anything its fine - people tend to whine (i know i do sometimes too)

Okay so in terms of cumming, not everyone takes the same amount of time to cum. some really need lots of stimulation and stuff in order to really cum and others cum really quickly. its an individual thing - but you definitely seem like the former. That being said, just because you take longer to cum and the female anatomy is more complex (really its not t H A T hard) doesn’t mean he should give up - you work hard for him to make him cum and he should do the same for you. especially since you’ve been together for so long.

A lot of this seems that you’re actively trying more than he is (you’re not obligated to give him oral, especially if he doesn’t reciprocate and he definitely shouldn’t push it). In terms of anal, the human body is different from person to person and not everyone is wired the same. just because someone else enjoys anal doesn’t mean you will, and if it’s painful and you’re not enjoying it, perhaps it’s best to tell him to stop because you get nothing out of it. if he loves you, he’ll make the sacrifice even if he enjoys it (like you’ve been doing for him this entire time). If he’s cummed and he’s not actively wanting to make you cum - you need to call him out on it because it's not fair for him to orgasm and for you to work for it yourself. it’s downright selfish and bad sexual practices and more than anything its not okay and its not a healthy sex life.

I think my best advice right now is to actually talk and communicate with him. A good, healthy sexual relationship that satisfies both parties, can only and will only ever be possible through open communication. you’ve been together five years and you’ve said you’re happy with your relationship overall - which means that you’ve known each other long enough to openly communicate with each other about your likes/dislikes/things you want to try/how they can help. Thats the blanket one, but here are some things you can talk to him about:

In terms of making you cum - you know your body better than anyone else, so perhaps showing him what places are your erogenous zones may be an effective way. If you feel comfortable, sit in front of him and masturbate - show him what gets you off. Sometimes even have him participate - direct his hands to where you want him, tell him when something feels good, when something doesn’t feel so good. but communicate

Tell him that you always try for him and it’s upsetting and makes you feel unsatisfied when he doesn’t put in the same enthusiasm. in sexual relationships, there is compromise and sometimes you do things you don’t necessarily enjoy just as an act of love and care (one of my irls hated giving her boyfriend blowjobs but she used to do it because he enjoyed them and that's okay because she was willing to do it out of love. there were also things he compromised for her like how he never enjoyed wearing condoms because it didn’t feel as good but she didn’t want to go on birth control so he accepted it). There are clearly things you are willing to compromise on (anal) and so he should be doing the same for you

You’re both different people and have different sexual interests and what feels good for you. You should both put in effort to explore these together. Have an actual conversation with him - and if he doesn’t take your feelings, if he starts getting upset or offended, then that speaks more for him. but if he loves you, if he’s a good partner and boyfriend, he will actively listen to you and your feelings and try and understand them. without communication sex and relationships are nothing and you cannot be afraid to speak to him or not speak to him for fear of him reacting negatively.

also if he does reactively, maybe it’s worth considering if this relationship is worth going on with. sometimes people stay with each other because it’s all they know, because they’ve been together for a long time and they fear starting fresh. but that is not healthy. if something isn’t working, no matter how much time and effort you’ve put into it, it’s not worth staying and being unhappy and the best thing you can do is gather the courage to get up, leave and move on and find happiness somewhere else.

i think ? i’ve got most of my points across, but if there’s anything you need clarification on, please do feel free to message me again! but please remember my earlier disclaimer: i am in no way shape or form a professional and i have no qualifications in order to give you advice. these are just my thoughts/opinions/how i see things!!

anyway, i hope this helped! i’m so sorry it took so long to get back to you!

[tslasvegas]

Episode 2: “I am typically regarded as a joke” - Livingston

Anyways... rip Colin, no idea who that was.. obviously Okay well I think we are out of the first impressions stage of this game and I think I've done an okay job of not making a strong impression one way or another, except to DeNara who I've been talking to most consistently since the start of this game. Except for today lmfao I was NOT active on purpose but I'll try to get to that in this confessional. I saw that the tribe went on a call so I decided to join and chit-chat with the girlies of this tribe and I've gotta say.. I'm lowkey disappointed to learn that despite being a returning player, everybody else on the tribe is friends with each other. Aside from Mo it sounds like they all know each other one way or another and I'm kinda left out of that connection. Even though they might not all be friends, it is a bit uncomfortable to be in a call with people where you know NOTHING they're talking about and you're not catching any of the jokes or references to other games. Also, I noticed that the personalities kinda blended together and these aren't people that I'd get along with in other orgs I play, so.. oops. One highlight of the call was that Nik was talking about Rachael and they were saying that Rachael got rid of them, I believe. Basically just talking about how they view Rachael differently because of that I guess? I was kind of in and out during that. But then DeNara posted IN THE TRIBE CHAT when it was just us three plus Kailyn on the call that Nik was spilling tea... and it was just. so. cringe. Idk if Nik or Kailyn noticed and the fact that everyone else was acting so nonchalant makes me think I missed something but either way I was on mute howling bc of second-hand embarrassment. As far as my current position, I do feel a bit comfortable with where I'm at because although I AM uncomfortable being left out of the friend group, normally I thrive early game when I get underestimated. I'm trying to just not make waves and stick to whatever plans come my way and hopefully people don't view me as a threat. Every time I'd leave and rejoin the call everybody was talking about totally normal IRL stuff so it doesn't seem like people are playing the game yet, but last round I did make a bit of an alliance with DeNara for the time being. Despite feeling like an outsider, I'm going to just continue to look at the positives of every situation because as a pessimistic person by nature, I'm inclined to feel doomed in any scenario. But this is my redemption season. I'm not here to get tenth place, I'm here to win and this season will prove itself to be an uphill battle and I'm just getting started. Tumblr Survivor has always felt like the story of Sisyphus and the Boulder to me. Look into the deeper meaning of the story and I promise a lot of the details do kind of relate to me and my character throughout my run in this community, but the general idea is that I've been tasked with a chore of having to push this heavy boulder up a neverending mountain in Hell. As a returning player, I've faced a lot of hardship when I could've just gotten the outcome I want the first time, and each return to Tumblr Survivor, I've pretty much done worse and worse since then. I'm ready to finally push that fucking boulder out of the underworld and bring myself back to the playing field I deserve to be on. For now, I'm just going to keep pushing.

So glad we won that first immunity. Why am I not surprise to see a unanimous vote for the first tribal. Even a self vote.... hopefully we win again today 

I’m already over this tribe. Keegan and Liv are the only fun ones to talk to, Joey I think tries but also doesn’t. Also low key hoping people don’t know too much about Svalbard cause if people know about Rachael and I being close that could be a problem. I’m not letting my work schedule get in the way of my activity, but it’s a bad sign to me when I’m of the most active people on the tribe. I should be the baseline, not the gold standard

I think our Tribe is a bit laid back. Not much interaction, not really that engaging. I hope Jake and Kevin did a good job at the challenge, I don't want to go to Tribal again. The typhoon here passed, I hope Tribal passes too!

Woo we got out the main inactive person. Although really my entire tribe is quiet and lowkey inactive, but Jake and I talk a lot in PMs which is good. Also Stephen is doing his best with timezones so I know he wants to play bc he's always on when he is able to be on. The next biggest inactive person on the tribe is Kevin, but he instantly volunteered to do the challenge so yay I guess. If we lose though, he is still an option to go in my mind. I'm not trying to make too much of a plan because we could win this challenge and then I'm going to try to open the vault because if we come in first I will have 10 chips. But I still need to figure out if it costs 10 chips to open the vault or if you're just not allowed to look at it until you have 10 chips.

You want a confessional, well here it is. Nothing has happened. To be honest, I’ve barely even spoken to anyone today. Or yesterday for that matter. It’s also been quiet in tribe chat.

I finally got my tribe on a call. Most of them joined in, at least for a little bit so that was nice. The only person that wasn't on call was Ben, which kind of paints him as the outsider of the tribe right now. 

...five seconds later

I want to get to know Mo better and maybe set up some sort of alliance with them, but they are so spotty with when they are on, it is difficult to keep a conversation going. I am not chill enough for this game yet lol.

ok. so like that's annoying. that challenge was supposed to be fun but jake is making a big stink. and like yeah i'm mad too but like it's over and it's just a game it's not like actual money lol. also, i don't really care if we go to tribal. makes you stronger. whatever. i'm sure he's a nice person but like i think he's just mad he lost. whatevs. 

Nik and Rachael did our challenge and won. Thank goodness it wasn't me! What my tribe will soon come to realize is I am basically useless at challenges. Rip me.

...five seconds later

Yay! Mo finally asked if I wanted to work together! Took them long enough ;-) jkjk I am excited to finally start playing this game

So after a heated and undeserved loss - sorry Dan I know we talked about it but I'm sticking to my guns - I start packing my bags. All of a sudden Stephen wants to target John, John wants to target Timmy; and nobody is throwing my name out there... Like... Hello? I just got into a public fight with production, shouldn't I be target number one? And now, Xavier and I are the swing votes... How the hell did the worst Tumblr Survivor Player and a 45 Year old man end up stuck in the middle? What the hell even is this season?

WE LOST AGAIN. So now which alliance to choose?! 

I can't believe this round. I should be the target, why - why am I not the target? I lost the challenge. I yelled at production. I am the easiest vote, but nobody is voting me! What is happening?? Timmy and Stephen made an alliance chat with Xavier and I to vote John. John and Kevin are working together to vote Timmy. Xavier says - "Jake tell me what to do!" Timmy and John are both telling me everything the other one is saying to each other, and it's amazing. I have no idea how Xavier and I are voting tonight. On one hand, you have Stephen and Timmy who seem like a really strong duo. But Stephen trusts me a lot, and if I vote out his closest ally than I'll go down that list - which could be trouble in case of the inevitable swap. John is MY closest ally, but if we vote him out the team is much more united. Do I play for ME or do I play for WE? I'm 95% sure the vote is going to be 4-2, and people are going to be blindsided.

“Theres three tribes! Means we’re less likely to have back to back tribals” -_- sure jan. So we lost again, blergh, looked like an annoying challenge. The tribe is still pretty muted, who knows whether they’re voting for me or not. I made a 4-man alliance with Timmy Jake and Xavier, which i do want, but we’ll have to see if everyone is legit. The two bad possibilities are if everyone is actually voting me for various reasons (timezone, round one oopsie, etc.) or if the real vote is jake for arguing with dan. idk, time will tell. From my POV the vote is John, pretty randomly just based on the fact of who competed in the challenge.

Hiiiiiii So I am very excited to be back in the game again. I very much enjoy my original tribe especially Andrew. We already have a Pennsylvania alliance with Stephanie and I think that that is good groundwork to have moving forward should we ever lose a challenge we already have three that are tight in at seven so if we hear anything about any of them targeting us we can do something about it. I like Livingston a lot and Joey but I can’t tell if Joey is 14 years old or not and that kind of bothers me. I am v excited to get with Kevin and see where me him and Andrew can go 

Winning is great, but we need to lose the next one or it’s gonna be a weird spot if the first swap is at 18, although it is very possible that it’s at 16. I don’t want to go into a swap with all the agency being with Luxor, or us having the most players because in both cases we get painted as the targets. Bad news all around

I have yet to confess but here goes! I feel very good on my tribe. We seem to be doing fairly well at comps so far and I would love to continue to miss Tribal as much as humanly possible. I have talked to everyone on my tribe in some capacity but I am not trying to be the one to initiate like alliances and shit before we even have to attend tribal. I just wanna be chill and lay low while also being a good member of the tribe whom people like. Keegan and I have a mutual agreement to make sure each other gets far. I got first boot in my last game and he has never made single digits here in Tumblr Survivor so let's change that. One fear with working with Keegan is that he knows how I play. I played his game, Forest of Horrors, and got rocked out at the Final 7. Keegan has since told me that I was runner up for Player of the Season. I am typically regarded as a joke in this community but Keegan is someone who knows how I play and respects how I play. This game is an entirely different scenario so I am going to likely try to keep my connection up with him.

So the vote seems like it's going to be John Coffey. I'm quite sad about it for a few reasons. He is really nice and I know we work well together in games and he is a very loyal player. Also, Jake had an entire temper tantrum last night after results and that was just extremely annoying. But, Jake is more active and talks to me more while John is a rare sighting. Tbh I would rather it be Kevin but I think they're getting a pass since they participated in the challenge...always next tribal because knowing this tribe it's a strong possibility. I swear if the next challenge is a music video though I will punch a wall since that will be my death sentence since I do not participate in those. I never feel comfortable so I just don't. If we go to tribal as a tribe of 5, that might not be that good, so just really hoping that that is not the next challenge.

ok here's the tea guys. i am pretty solid in my tribe right now. after this vote tonight there 5 of us, and 4 of us are in an alliance, which is good. HOWEVER, i'm solid with the 3 people separately. that's put me in a good spot for a tribe swap/merge. obviously we're like years away from a merge. but we could tribe swap soon. we shall see! 

[fisheoctrashdump]

Scarlette and 2, 3, 4, 14, 15, 16, and 20 with Avery, Arvid, and Kaya

Cooking

Scarlette's cooking is very basic. She can boil pasta, make pancakes, and roast vegetables. It's all pretty simple, but at least it's edible lol she tends to use too much butter and sauces when she cooks, but other than that, it's fine.

Also, she doesn't eat meat so she never actually taught herself how to cook it.

Sleeping

Her sleeping schedule is all over the place. Sometimes she can fall asleep at 7pm and sleep until noon the next day, and then other times she can't get herself to fall asleep no matter what she tries. She tends to wander the house on those nights she can't fall asleep. She will eventually find a comfortable spot in the kitchen or outside someone's door and just vibe there in the dark until she either passes out or the sun starts to rise.

Driving

Scarlette has her license, but not a car. Currently, she and Clara are sharing a car. Scarlette is insistent on getting her first car herself, even though she hasn't been able to find a job yet.

She's a very careful driver. It still makes her nervous to drive sometimes, and she mostly won't drive unless she has to. When she does have to drive, it's usually because Kaya wants to go somewhere. Clara is super cool about letting Scarlette take her car, mostly because she doesn't have anywhere else to be most of the time.

Dancing

Scarlette dances….. really weird. I imagine she dances in a very Roy Purdy kinda way lol She dances because it's fun, not because she's good at it. (Also keep imagining Scarlette and Johnny dancing similarly for funsies)

Singing

She's not all that good at singing. She sometimes sings stupid little songs that she makes up on the spot to be funny, but she's aware that she doesn't have any talent when she sings. Sometimes if a song really reaches her and she wants to sing along to it, she turns it up a little louder and sings softly along to it.

Anger

Like with her sadness, Scarlette buries her anger. She doesn't get angry about much. The few major times she's been angry was like, during the situation with Amber, seeing bad things happening to her family (like when Arvid was in the hospital or when Clara and Venus were breaking up with Erika and Cass), or during the last few months of being friends with Rowen before he died.

Something else that causes her a lot of stress and anger is Kaya's relationship with Livia.

She believes her anger is something that should be concealed, and she works hard to make it unnoticeable to everyone around her. I feel like, when she finally hits her breaking point, it will be rather scary to her friends and family. She won't blow up or anything, but it's a silent rage that makes her just look darker, maybe even evil? (I'm basing this on someone I know, so idk how to explain it but I'm picturing it in my mind anyway lol)

Relationship with ___

Avery -

With Avery, I've been imagining Scarlette kinda knowing Avery before Arvid does. They were never close or anything, just in the same class together in first or second grade. I don't imagine they talked much if at all, but it is something she likes to tease Arvid about lol

They'll get to know each other better later on, probably after gen2 events.

Their friendship starts up kinda suddenly. Avery starts trying to talk to Scarlette sometimes when he's around Arvid, but she avoids him at first. Arvid brushes it off as Scarlette just being weird and tells Avery not to take it personally, and after a few more attempts, Avery gives up so he doesn't make her feel uncomfortable.

Then like, overnight, Scarlette decides to talk to Avery first and they have their first real conversation and they both feel pretty good about it. Avery can see that Scarlette is kinda weird and eccentric, but he finds it intriguing. They both don't have too much in common, but they start experiencing new things together.

Scarlette being friends with Avery makes her very nervous at first. She's very worried about him, his mental health, and what he thinks of her, but she doesn't let any of this show. She eventually learns to separate her feelings about Avery from her feelings about Rowen, and it becomes much easier for her to manage their friendship.

To the outsider's perspective, these two are polar opposites. Scarlette is always so full of energy with so much to say, while Avery is very quiet and seems to be very serious. He finds Scarlette to be super funny and enjoys trying to match her energy when they hang out, doing silly and embarrassing stuff with her, without a second thought. She enjoys pulling Avery out of his comfort zone, and seeing him have fun with her.

Arvid -

Scarlette cares about Arvid a lot. She wants to see him happy, and tries to be a fun older sister to him -

But most of the time, Scarlette just feels distant from Arvid. She understands the fact that she is purposely doing things to annoy Arvid, but she consistently feels like her presence is unwanted by him no matter what she does. She is often very hurt by Arvid's words and actions, because she wishes to build a solid relationship with him even though he pushes her away. She continues to make the effort to communicate and spend time with him regardless, and never addresses how Arvid makes her feel.

Kaya -

Her relationship with Kaya really sucks at the moment. Scarlette feels helpless watching Kaya make poor decisions, all while struggling with keeping the balance of maintaining a fake relationship, while also realizing she has real feelings for her. She doesn't feel like Kaya would reciprocate, or even care if Scarlette told her how she felt. She sees Kaya as kind of selfish, but she feels bad for thinking that way about her best friend. She also has an incredible amount of jealousy and hatred for Livia, but she's forced to pretend that she likes her if she wants to stay a part of Kaya's life.

Scarlette feels that between Kaya's obsession with Livia and her preference for her new friends, she's being neglected not just in their fake relationship, but also in their friendship. Despite all this, Scarlette wants to see Kaya do better for herself, and still cares deeply for the person she knows Kaya can be.

[aizenat]

So in honor of the Fruits Basket reboot who would you say are your fave Furuba characters and ships (canon) and why? Least fave Furuba characters and canon ships and why?

Oh hi nonny! This is fun! I meant to reply earlier, but I know this is going to get in depth so I wanted to be on my computer when I replied. Also, this is going to have major Furuba spoilers (duh). 

I’ll start with the least favorites to get the negatives out of the way. My least fave characters are hard because I tend to love more than hate characters in this series. However...

I didn’t really like Motoko or any of the Prince Yuki fanclub girls. I had a much better appreciation for her after that graduation scene; I’m glad she didn’t confess to Yuki and instead just thanked him for helping make her high school experience fun. When you think of that, how she had a group of friends who all shared this adoration for him, and how much fun she had, it is sweet. 

BUT the fucking fangirls really helped create a culture in their school where people couldn’t get close to Yuki even if they wanted to! And seeing how much that hurt Yuki, despite their intentions, it irks me. It was only once there were people like Manabe and Kimi who didn’t give a fuck about the fangirls (Kimi’s handling of the fangirls was just so wonderfully delicious for this very reason) that Yuki was finally able to have a fun high school experience and let loose a bit. It’s not all Motoko’s and the fangirls’ fault; Yuki had his own demons to fight through. But you can’t deny that if everyone knows that there is a legit fanclub with strict rules on how anyone, especially girls, are allowed to communicate with him, they’re not going to think they can joke around and goof off with him. 

Interestingly enough, I think her daughter makes up for her. Her daughter’s love of the Sohmas is so much funnier, non-obtrusive, and more respectful than Motoko’s was. 

This might be unpopular or surprising, but I really dislike Shigure. Aside from him being a disgusting lech (that scene with him going the high school talking about seeing high school girls is sick. And as someone who is 27 going on 28 my own damn self, I would protect high school girls from perverts like him until my dying breath), I just find his motivations and mindset fucked up. Like, he was fucked when he decided Akito was the love of his life, but the things he does just to get a reaction from her is annoying as BALLS. Idk if we ever got a definite number for how old Akito is, but she’s still much younger than Shigure. And doing shit like SLEEPING WITH HER MOTHER out of spite when you know Akito is just one wind blow away from losing her fucking shit is just so gross. He’s too grown to be doing dumb shit like that, and I have zero respect for him. 

Also, on a side note, I don’t really like Kureno either. Not like he did anything in particular (except get with Arisa, which I don’t like at all), but I find him boring as dirt. The only interesting thing about him is that he’s the first one who’s curse broke. Cool. So why are you here? He’s not much of a character; he’s just there to show that the curse IS breaking, and then to cause tension between Akito and Shigure. All while being dull and annoying. Boy, bye. 

Least favorite “ships” is funny because I actually dislike more couples than I like. But among my least favorite are: 

I think I lowkey read Arisa as a lesbian as a kid, and it was really annoying that Takaya-sensei decided to force her into a relationship. Especially because I just wasn’t sold on her and Kureno. Kureno is nothing like Tohru for her to be doing that “Oh, he’s like Tohru” thing. He did one thing she would do, boo hoo. I can’t imagine Tohru also doing what he did with Akito (ie, not leaving/not establishing boundaries), so there’s that. Also, the, like, 9 year or whatever age difference is a hard no. Arisa had so much potential and personality and whatnot than to become that fuckboy’s housewife. ALSO, that line when she says she wants to hit like 6 feet or something, and Kyo asks if she wants to be a model or something, I couldn’t help but think “oooh, she should be a model!” Imagine Arisa as a model! That’s what she should have been; not Kureno’s girlfriend. UGH! 

No matter how many times I read it, I can’t get over Katsuya and Kyoko’s age difference. I mean, at least Arisa is in high school and been through some shit to mature her where you can KINDA be okay with her and Kureno (except me, who hates it 100%). But Kyoko was IN MIDDLE SCHOOL. Like, how you a grown man falling for a MIDDLE SCHOOL STUDENT. The fuck? The hell? Jesus did not die on the cross for this. Even taking into consideration culture and the time period, it’s 10000000000% NOT okay. NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO. Even when I was the same age as Kyoko myself reading this (like 15ish), I had a HUGE issue when I learned about that age gap. It’s gross. It’s predatory. And when he’s even called out on it by Kyoko, he laughs it off. 

His personality was cute, but I don’t know why they couldn’t wait. Like, even if they did something where they met when she was in middle school, and then maybe ten years later, while Kyoko was reforming her delinquent ways, she finds Katsuya again and reconnects with him, fine. But really? 

I respect it only because they made Tohru and she’s a gem, and he died long before the story began, so it is what it is. But ew, hell no. 

The last couple I don’t really like, and this is really unpopular, is Haru and Rin. I know most people who read this love them, but I always found their relationship to be too codependent and unhealthy. Rin isn’t my favorite character, but considering her history, I can’t be too mad at her. Not to mention she reacts the way you would expect a high school girl going through what she did to behave. I was friends with angry girls like her in high school; I get it. I also saw those same girls get into unhealthy codependent relationships with guys and are still struggling today. I like Haru a lot, and I’m sure he and Rin could be sweet. I love how protective he is of her. But Haru just wasn’t right for Rin when they were going through the breakup and then getting back together thing. The things they said to each other were just off putting to me. Once things calmed down, they were fine, but I found it hard to root for them because of what a weird introduction we got to them as a couple. 

Now on to the positives. My favorite characters. This is going to be conventional, buuuuuut...

Tohru, obviously. Only losers who fell off Fruits Basket don’t love Tohru. She’s very awe inspiring honestly with her attitude. You read her reactions and think how you want to be that sort of person. You want the be the person someone looks at and thinks of as home. You want to be the sort of person who is encouraging and positive and happy. You want to be someone full of light. 

I do have critiques of her being a “perfect mother” character, and how she finds herself mothering a bunch of guys (like, literally taking care of three males cooking and cleaning for them. Gross). There is something to be said about whether Tohru would work as a character if she had real goals other than “get a job and support myself.” If she had goals like wanting to go away to college and get a career. Like, imagine Tohru as a therapist. She’d be able to help so many people. But no, her humble Japanese heart wouldn’t allow her to go for some sort of passion that grandiose. Like, we live in a modern day where it’s GOOD for girls to have passions, so it’s kinda off putting that her only passion is homemaking and nurturing those around her. 

BUT, she’s still so sweet and kind and makes you want to be a better person! lol. 

What’s funny about Flying Pot-kun is that when he was introduced, I remember thinking “he reminds me of someone.” And I was racking my brain of people I knew irl, wondering who he reminded me of. Then Yuki starts going “he reminds me of someone,” and I was like “What? Yuki too?” And when Yuki thought of his brother, I started DYING laughing! It’s ironic that Yuki’s best friend ends up being a younger version of his brother who irritates him. 

Manabe is really fun, but I really love his relationship with Yuki. I like when they fight, when they talk. But what really impressed me is the scene with Komaki, where she tells him off about what he said to Tohru at her mother’s wake. And how instead of getting defensive (”what? I was only looking out for you!”), he realized that he fucked up. I wish he would have apologized to Tohru earlier, even if she didn’t remember him until a while later, but he’s a guy so I don’t expect much from them (whoops, my misandry was showing). 

Still, Manabe reminds me of my guy friends from hs, and how fun and stupid and silly they were. I could see him hanging out with them, getting in trouble with them, so I like him lol. 

My #1 favorite character has to be Yuki. What’s hilarious is that when I first read Fruits Basket through (so, as a teen, reading all the volumes as they came out during the Tokyopop run), I HATED Yuki. I thought he was a dick to Kyo unnecessarily. There’s that one moment right after the “True Form Reveal” I believe where Kyo is visibly trying to not snap at Yuki the way he normally does. But then Yuki provokes him and causes Kyo to yell at him. As the oppressed older sister of a favored younger brother, I know first hand how it feels to be provoked to anger by someone who knows how to push your buttons. And so I likened Yuki to my brother and hated him for that. It felt like to me that every time Kyo wanted to move on, Yuki was there to put him down. 

Then I reread Fruits Basket when I was 19 and realized “Holy shit, Yuki is a male version of me.” Not 100% obviously, but his self loathing and the way he isolated himself even after no longer being under the direct control of his family was something I could relate to. I realized that I disliked Yuki because I saw in him all the flaws I disliked in myself: hating him was easy because I was hating these parts of myself. 

When I understood that, I related to his story more, and he’s always my favorite character now. I especially love once he becomes student body president. All of the scenes with him and the rest of his student council members are gold. Kimi and her stupid flirting, Manabe going off track, Chibi-suke’s play at maturity while everyone else goofs off, and Machi’s quiet and awkward energy leads to some amazing moments. Seeing Yuki interact with them in a way he never lets himself behave with his family is great; and we get to see a side of him you know his classmates rarely see too. You watch his confidence grow and it just makes my heart glow. I’m smiling while I’m typing this lol. 

Favorite couples? Tbqh, there’s only two I really love and respect, and they’re the obvious two. All others can fall apart tomorrow and I’d feel NOTHING. But these two were endgame and perfect. 

Tohru and Kyo. God, the first time I read this series, when I realized that it was setting those two up, I wanted to DIE from happiness. Kyo was my BOY first time around, and he could do no wrong. So to know he “won” over Yuki and got the girl made me so happy. Rereading it, I always find Tohru and Kyo so adorably compatible. Tohru is very good at reading his love language, and seeing his deeper meaning. I remember someone mentioned that Yuki, in the beginning, still kept a lid on his feelings, making it hard for Tohru to 100% connect to him. And that Kyo was always so explosive with his feelings; even if it’s awkward and not 100% how he feels, Kyo still expresses how he feels as he’s feeling them. 

I think that’s why when she confesses to him, she takes his rejection as REAL rejection. Because Kyo is always the honest one, the one she rarely has to question how he feels. Kyo is always honest. I thought that was a good assessment, and a good reason why they work. 

Not only is Tohru’s love for Kyo healing for him, but her love for Kyo is healing for Tohru. Being able to move forward and create a future with him allows her to move on from her past. Through loving Kyo, and working on breaking the curse so she can free him and be with him, can she move past her mother’s death. Imagine if she just graduated, got a job, and lived on her own after high school. She’d be alone. And left with remembering her mother all the time. It would have broken her. Loving Kyo meant she had to be willing to let her mother go a bit. Move on and live despite her mother not being around. And after Kyo stopped being a dumbass, that’s what his love was for her. It freed her. Not as a distraction, but as a way for her to heal from it. 

They were really made for each other. 

Despite my love for Tohru and Kyo, Yuki and Machi are just my absolutely FAVORITE. Their dynamic together is so interesting. Yuki is so used to people putting him on a pedestal that he’s intrigued by someone who’s like “he’s not a prince; he’s just an average guy.” And when he starts giving her attention, Machi, who is used to being ignored and overlooked, is flabbergasted. Not only that, but he UNDERSTANDS her without her having to say anything. And what’s funny is that that is how Yuki is. He doesn’t express his feelings the way Kyo does; he holds a lot in. His feelings might manifest in small ways, but it’s hard for others to read it.

Because it’s how he is, Yuki is able to read deeper into Machi’s actions. He hears a story from Manabe about her walking in the snow, just making footprints, and then sees that she destroys clean and organized rooms and spaces. He puts two and two together: she hates when things are “perfect” and orderly. So she has to “ruin” them. And just like that, he gets it. Like, imagine what they’re house has to be like with Yuki being bad at cleaning and Machi just HATING a messy home! And considering how their son almost brags about his messy habits in Fruits Basket: Another, jfc, it’s gotta be bad! 

I think that’s why Yuki and Machi are so cute to me: they also compliment each other. They can observe each other and see deeper than what others see. Machi didn’t just see his perfect persona at school: she saw beneath that. She remarks that he seems lonely, and he is. He sees her actions and realizes the truth. They think of each other and then do things based on that. Yuki sees her clutching a Mogeta when she meets his brother and realizes she must like him. Then sees another Mogeta while out and buys it for her just like that. Machi asks Yuki what he wants and when he says fertilizer like a dumbass not realizing her intent, she goes out to get it for him (carrying fertilizer by herself couldn’t have been easy). 

They see each other. And that’s what’s so beautiful. In a world where they both, for one reason or another, are so easily forgotten and overlooked, they see each other. They found each other. They get each other. FUCKING CHRIST IT’S TOO BEAUTIFUL TO THINK ABOUT. 

Also, some honorable mentions of couples I actually liked: Komaki and Manabe (I hope she beats his ass every time he calls her his meat angel lol), Ayame and Mine (I wish we saw more from them; then maybe I’d like them enough to wax poetry over them), and Hatori and the Great Mayu-chan-sensei (god, those two!!!!! Wonderful!!!!!). 

Thanks, nonny, this was fun!