#IT WASNT AS BAD AS EVERYONE'S SAYING IT IS 😭😭😭

[ceofcatgirls]

//suggestive

Going to finally make a post about this bc its been haunting my mind for a good month or two at this point--

This is a brief-ish post about guns being used as a metaphor for masculinity, power, and potential stand-in for phallus imagery in the dollars trilogy. I'll also be speaking about these things from a general stand point too, but I'll try to focus on how and where they interconnect.

I doubt most ppl will read all of this but I have brainworms so I need to put this out somewhere .

I think a lot of these points can be said about Westerns in general, btw. Not just Leone movies. However I'll focus on the dollar trilogy because this is already too long and needs to have a focus.

Now, I'm sure masculinity will need no defining, but I'll briefly show what definition of phallic imagery I use;

(Yes I'll eventually tie all this to the homoeroticism present in the movies, with a slight feminist bent to this analysis)

(I want you to keep in mind throughout this post that guns are metaphoric stand ins for dicks lol, just so i dont have to keep repeating that all the time)

I think this definition is quite good as it incorporates the concept of power into itself, which imo is a must-have when discussing masculinity in artwork.

As expected, there is an undeniable connection between phallic imagery and masculinity, which is also tied to power. A lot of masculinity throughout human history has relied upon genitals (even if not completely) to assert itself, which in turn, would affect the power relations men and women have, but also between men themselves. After all, the patriarchy is dependent on gender, with the male gender having the upper hand. This would mean, within a patriarchal society, men with more masculinity have more power, so we can see how sexuality is so tied to the patriarchy also, and how men will inevitably compete.

I'll start with perhaps one of the most obvious examples of this from the trilogy; which also conveniently has phallic imagery, or phallic metaphors.

Specifically, I'll start with the first proper interaction Colonel Mortimer and Manco have in For a Few Dollars More

(I'll link the clip just in case)

I'll state the obvious first; this is obviously a competition to define who would have the most power (and thus upper hand) in their relationship. That's why neither character backs down, and why there is a tense animosity between the two. Of course its also more complicated than that; Manco, the youngest of the two, is obviously taking this more seriously and is the more antagonistic. Mortimer seems to just be entertaining him at times, whilst also trying to show that his years of experience can give him the upper hand. Its a perfect scene presenting power, age, experience, who the characters are, and how their relationship will be forward from this.

And of course, as any western, guns are used for this.

Perhaps it's the perfect genre for what Sergio Leone wanted to present. Guns are the perfect metaphor for a phallus; they display power, they display masculinity, and they even have the shape! They can define life or death, much like how male sexuality, and therefore a phallus, can define a man's position in the patriarchy.

The shootout ends in a draw, as both Mortimer and Manco are skilled with their guns. Their stand-off for power and dominance led to a standstill and an equilibrium between the two. This will then define their relationship, as they form a equal partnership.

(And of course, perhaps Mortimer was being kind to Manco and held back a bit. He did the same in the end of the movie, by letting him take all the rewards. To Mortimer, there is more to gunslinging than an attempt to assert masculinity. And the fact that he holds back in his competition with Manco presents a level of respect he has for him, which adds on to the already existing homoeroticism of two men using guns to assert their dominance onto each other. I'd even argue that's what makes the homoeroticism purposeful, in this movie's case.)

There are other examples of guns bring used to impose masculinity throughout For a Few Dollars More. That is the crux of every final duel after all. But Mortimer and El Indio don't have significant homoerotic undertones so I won't get into it.

My other favourite example of this occurance in the dollars trilogy, is in The Good, The Bad and The Ugly.

It's a quick, small moment in a wider, longer scene. However I like how it gets across its message in a simple way.

It's the end of the scene where Angel Eyes forces a partnership onto Blondie.

I think it's important to mention how this is how Sergio Leone chose to end a scene where Angel Eyes and Blondie form a partnership. Its basically telling the viewer that Blondie consents to working with Angel Eyes. On a surface level, Blondie is sliding the gun to its holster to show that he's making peace with Angel Eyes. However, further introspection on the subtext also reveals other things.

For starters. The slow sliding in and the zoom in on the gun, with it becoming the centre point of the scene, easily becomes homoerotic (I don't think I need to explain how sexually suggestive it looks), but with it being seen as a sign of peace, it can also be seen as a sign of not only consent, but also submissiveness. Blondie here is admitting that he's under the thumb of Angel Eyes, and he can't do anything about it, not even with a gun. He can't challenge his power, nor his masculinity. The phallic imagery here only adds on to all of these points, for reasons mentioned previously.

Moving on from specific scenes, I'll mention something present throughout the movie that the definition I used above also mentions; cigars can also been stand-ins for phallic imagery, and masculinity.

Do I really have to mention how The Man With No Name is literally always having a cigar in his mouth ??? Its a very obvious oral fixation, one that Sergio Leone uses to his advantage.

Leone doesn't just use a cigar to make TMWNN look cool. The cigar, much like how a gun was used to represent Manco and Mortimer's, and Blondie's and Angel Eyes', relationships and partnerships, its also used to represent the relationship between Blondie and Tuco.

The scene where, imo, Blondie's and Tuco's relationship changes, is where Blondie offers Tuco a cigar after eavesdropping the conversation between Tuco and his brother.

And Tuco takes it, smokes it and grins!

Notably, Tuco's and Blondie's changing relationship is shown through a cigar rather than a gun, which is objectively significantly less violent, which sets them apart from the other relationships. There is also a closer contact between them, as in the other iterations of TMWNN never gave his gun to any ally of his, much less shared such a close contact as mouth-to-mouth.

The homoeroticism is rather obvious, and in this cade, it's present without power but still with phallic imagery.

(Another notable example was, if my memory serves correctly, in a Fistful of Dollars, Joe lights up a cigar for Ramone. But I won't mention that much since I could be confusing this for another movie, but if it did happen, it's also another scene packed with symbolism, and quite the opposite to Tuco's and Blondie's cigar scene).

Continuing to speak more generally, there are often focus and zoom ins on the guns in the movies. This peaks at the final Mexican standoff in GBU, where the guns are in their holsters and belts. Its natural that they'd be near their crotches too, but that only emphasises the masculinity, power and phallic imagery already present in the movie (as well as tension in the scene).

It comes with no surprise when Blondie chose Angel Eyes to shoot at. After all, Tuco and he had already made peace with each other. The only true masculine competition was between Angel Eyes and Blondie + Tuco.

There are also scenes where TMWNN shows off his skills with his gun; displaying his masculinity again through phallic imagery, so it's no wonder he went to become a figure of masculinity.

There is also the scene where Tuco acquires a new gun after being abandoned by Blondie. That represents what was mentioned previously; how men often fight for power. In this case Blondie takes away Tuco's power and masculinity by humiliating him in a desert. Tuco acquiring a new, polished and refined gun is his way of reclaiming his masculinity after Blondie emasculated him.

I won't speak much about A Fistful of Dollars, because the relationship between Joe and Ramone isn't as developed as the other relationships in the other movies. But it's also worth noting how a focal point in the final duel includes Joe's pistol and Ramone's supposedly stronger gun.

"When a man with a .45 meets a man with a rifle, you said the man with the pistol is a dead man. Let's see if that's true. Go ahead, load up and shoot."

In here, Joe reclaims his masculinity through a final duel. I wish the movie had been longer so I could connect potential homoeroticism to this scene like I did with the other examples, but I think it's a good scene, so I mentioned it nonetheless.

Sergio Leone movies are very much centred around men. That's generally how westerns work, too. But I think it's interesting, as it adds aligns with the analysis that men uphold the patriarchy between themselves, and this is even more true with Leone movies as they include little to no women (whereas many westerns have at least one or two), so most interactions are between men.

I'm not suggesting Sergio Leone intended all this. I do think the homoeroticism, phallic imagery and masculinity is purposeful. He was a Marxist, so perhaps the feminist angle to all this was also purposeful, but I don't think that's the case. Much like his contemporaries, Leone focused on class analysis when critiquing power structures (this mostly in his other movies), so the patriarchal angle was perhaps unintentional. I like to give the benefit of the doubt to artists when analysing their art, though, so I'm always happy to be proven wrong.

As I said. This is way too long and no one will probably read all of it. There are far more examples but I won't include every bc this is already a long asf post.

What the conclusion? I need to stop thinking about gay people!!!!!!!!!

A look into how my braincells look whenever I think about these homos a bit too much;

And this is how I felt writing this post:

And the thing is there's so much more I can say but I don't wanna make this too long esp since this is me ranting more than a proper analysis but jfc Leone always made sure to make his movies so damn gay it's actually insane

[annegroves]

Finished noragami...Man wtf 😭 yall werent kidding about that ending it was even worse than i thought LMAO

[angrywarrior69]

I'm tired after work too but if I don't do one of my hobbies for at least an hour every day I start to get deranged. Watching TV feels like a waste of time unless I've specifically set time aside to watch tv

[elliesanqel]

loser ellie being down bad for mean!reader please like maybe shes a popular girl that kinda makes fun of her

obsessed

sypnosis; you were the popular girl—mostly known for making fun of people but there was one girl in particular you always made fun of on the daily. however, with you thinking she hated your guts because of how you treat her, little did you know how secretly obsessed she was with you when she shows another side of herself. warnings; smut, sub!fem reader, dom!ellie, semi-public fingering, slight cum play, not proofread, mdni. a/n; sorry for the wait…i’ve been sick😭 but here i am powering through💪 i looooved this idea so tysm for ur req! (sorry if it sounds rushed, better ones will come soon💔) hope u enjoy! reqs are always open so send as many in i looove seeing them! also if you wanna be on my taglist drop a comment or dm me!

➝ masterlist

you sat at your table with your friends, just a regular wednesday. everyone who wasnt your friend saw you as the mean girl. the popular girl. the one everyone would kill to be like or even sit with. you had to admit, you loved the feeling of being drooled over. you were mean to alot of people, you enjoyed teasing. but when it came to that one girl? ellie williams? oh you enjoyed teasing her more than everyone—your go to was the fact that everyone knew she was a lesbian, mostly because of the fact you knew you could say something as you were straight. or…so you thought.

you laughed with your mates, till at the corner of your eye you see her, her backpack slung over her shoulder as she trails past your table, not even making eye contact and you could sense the fact she knew you’d say something when she turned her head the other way.

“look, guys. its that lesbian weirdo.” you laugh, thinking you were somewhat funny as your friends laughed too. you never let a day go by where you wouldn’t tease her. after all, in your eyes it was just banter. she shot you a look of disgust, which only made you smirk when you realised she wasnt trying to look away.

“what’re you starin’ for? hm? did you wanna kiss me or something?” you joke, your friends laughs echoing behind you. she rolled her eyes and walked off before you could make another joke, shooting you a side glance as she exited the cafeteria. you smiled to yourself, thinking your teasing was successful for today.

that was until after lunch had ended, you had 2 more lessons left before you went home now so you got up and said bye to your friends, walking towards the hallway to your next lesson.

you stopped at your locker for some things, but before you could close it a rough hand gripped around your arm and dragged you to the nearest empty classroom. you couldnt even react it was so fast, all you could do was try and scream but even that was abruptly cut off by a hand covering your mouth.

the classroom was pitch black as the blinds were down, but an open window blew one of the blinds slightly, letting some light in and illuminating who dragged you here. your eyes widened in confusion, but then you were just completely dumbfounded once you recognised the memorable features…of her.

“you—” you began, but your sentence was yet again cut off when she took a step closer, her firm hands wrapping around your naked thighs due to your short skirt, and she placed you on top of one of the desks. she looked at you with those eyes. that same look that you knew all too well.

“you get off on making me look like a fool all the time. don’t you think its my turn now?” she whispers seductively, her breath fanning across your lips as she leaned in, her palms resting on your thighs. this was the complete opposite of what you’d expected from her, and to add on—you’d never really heard her talk before up until now.

you gulped loudly, her words leaving you completely speechless. you silently cursed yourself as you felt your thighs involuntarily spreading a little further, letting her stand inbetween them which is exactly what she did when she saw the opportunity.

she gripped your thighs harder, her lips leaning in and brushing against your ear, her voice low. “hmm. this doesn’t seem like straight behaviour to me. the same girl who makes fun of me for not being it,” she whispers, her hot breath touching your ear.

“spreading those legs for me, huh? yeah, seems very straight, doesn’t it?” she teases. repeatedly mentioning the whole straight thing considering you constantly made fun of her for being lesbian. so many thoughts clouded your mind and you were partly confused, but she was able to read that part. “let me clear that mind of yours, mhm?” she mumbles breathlessly, pressing a warm kiss to your cheek before one of her hands slowly began reaching up your skirt.

“you were right, y’know. i do want to kiss you.”

your breath hitched, her lips inching closer to yours and pressing a soft kiss to them. her tongue slipped over your bottom lip—seeking entrance and you complied, parting your lips for her. her tongue slipped into your warm mouth, sliding against your own in a desperate kiss as both of your breaths were heavy. for some reason, you weren’t pulling away. god, what was she doing to you? you started questioning yourself. wondering wether you made fun of her just to cover up the fact that you could potentially…like her. so many thoughts clouded in your head, but her next movement quickly swiped them all away.

she broke the kiss—her middle and ring finger slipped up your thigh, and past your panties, gently running through your folds. fuck sake. in a classroom. seriously?

you arched forward as you felt her warm fingers rub your folds, your forehead meeting with her shoulder as a needy whine fell past your parted lips. her eyes widened at that, however. she lifted her other hand from your thigh, getting her pointer finger and middle finger and gliding them across your bottom lip, wanting to slip them in. “be quiet. suck.” she commanded, ordering you to suck on her fingers to keep you silent.

your eyes flashed open, but all you could do at this point was comply. you opened your mouth further, taking her digits into your mouth as you began sucking on them. her face fell, her teeth finding her bottom lip as she bit down on it, urging her other hand. she began circling your clit which caused you to bite down on her fingers that were making your mouth feel so full.

she loved the feeling, seeing the girl who made fun of her looking like a fool beneath her. “thats it, thaaats it. suck, sweetheart.” she teased, her voice still that low and seductive tone that you’d gotten used to by now.

she wasted no time in slipping her fingers inside of your clearly aching pussy. she could feel your walls clench around them as she slipping them in fully. you bit down harder on her fingers, your eyes completely rolling back as you arched further.

“ohhh fuck…look at you,” she whispers, moving her lips to your ear again, her voice lowering even further as she spoke. she layed soft kisses to your temple, her soft lips grazing against your skin. her fingers continued to move, pumping in and out of your sobbing hole at a fast pace. so fucking ruthless.

you could feel it now, your stomach tightening and your walls clenching around ellies fingers, she could feel it too. one of your hands reach to her forearm, gripping on for dear life as you could feel yourself on the edge, your teeth biting down harder and your tongue swirling around her fingers in your mouth. she swore she could feel your juices surround her other ones before you’d even came yet, beginning to smirk as she saw you unfolding for her.

“i-i…im gonna—” you almost gag on your words, your mouth completely full with saliva and surrounded by her fingers. your ankles wrap around her waist, trapping her in. “shh, i know, i know.” she whispers reassuringly. she knew you were teetering on the edge and she wanted to get you there, purely to see the sight and for you to feel pleasure. with a couple more pumps, her fingers curling up and stroking against your spongey spot, and her thumb finding your clit, circling it gently, you felt your whole body begin to shake before finally jolting.

your cum flowed out of your aching pussy, onto the desk below you and covering her fingers. you give one final bite on her fingers in your mouth, but you couldnt help but whine as your back arched once more. why was that so good…and why did you want more? she grinned, slipping her fingers out of your mouth with a pop.

then came her fingers from your wet cunt, slipping them out. she smirked at the sight. “i knew your cum would look good on my fingers,” she whispers, looking you dead in the eyes. but then she raised her fingers to her mouth, inserting them in and licking up every last bit like it was liquid fucking gold. she let out a content hum, all the while your eyes widening as you watched her lick your juices up.

her words lingered in your head. well fuck. she’s thought of this happening before.

she reached her hand back down, gathering more of your release back onto her fingers, causing your hips to move against them slightly and your teeth finding your bottom lip. she really didnt care by this point, how desperate she looked for you, she just cared about showing it. this time though, she inched her fingers to your mouth, caressing your lips and letting your own cum drip onto them.

you’d never experienced anything like this before but you knew what she wanted, and you couldnt help but want nothing more than to comply with it. your tongue darted out, licking up your own cum off your lips that she’d put there. she eyed your every movement, smirking as she watched you like she was watching a damn porn video—completely mesmerised.

she pushed your panties back to where they should be, licking her fingers a few more times like she’d just enjoyed and was full from a good meal. she leaned into you, her lips brushing against yours now which caused your heart to jolt.

“guess i’ll see you tomorrow then?” she whispers, her words hitting you like a fucking truck. see you tomorrow? oh no she did not.

your eyes shot open in fury, about to physically yell at her for acting so nonchalant now. but before you could even protest she’d already began walking to the classroom door, opening it and closing it behind her, not even having the courtesy to give you a glance before she left. you sat there, completely dumbfounded and angry that she’d left you in a damn classroom in a state like this.

but something tugged in your stomach, silently cursing yourself that you were actually excited for tomorrow.

taglist: @valeisaslut @elliesfavtoy @ttspenny @willurms @slutt4ellie @stvrluvrrpres @elliescoochieeater @st0nerlesb0 @les4elliewilliams @eveyuyy @starwilliams @ellieswrath @eriiwaii @vahnilla

[d3stinyist1red]

ʏᴀɴᴅᴇʀᴇ ᴄᴇʟᴇʙʀɪᴛʏ x ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ

yan celebrity who everyone likes and adores

yan celebrity who you texted for no reason at all, it wasnt even that bad it was just

--------------

Y/nis_daddysigma

wsg lil bro

nice clothes 🙏

-----------

yan celebrity who decided to check his insta messages that day, scrolling through the thousands of messages his fans sent him until he randomly picked one

yan celebrity who decided to respond to you

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Theyluvme

thanksss :3

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yan celebrity who immediately begins texting back and forth with you, you were SHOCKED ASF bc why is this random millionaire tryna keep convo with you..

yan celebrity who you managed to captivate within a small moment of time, immediately trying to text you every second of his day, kicking his feet back and forth when he texts you

yan celebrity who is hooked, waiting for your messages back, feeling so good when he hears that familiar buzz from his phone signalling that his wifey texted him

yan celebrity who thinks about you 24/7 now, thinking about who you were with, if they were a bad influence, if he should install more cameras in your house,

yan celebrity who literally fantasizes about your guys future, he decided that he WAS gonna carry your baby he does NOT care

Yan celebrity who can't handle it anymore, needing to be near you in real life, and not just him stalking you

yan celebrity who meets you the first time in real life after all those face time calls and texts messages, literally clinging onto you a koala, LITERALLY HIS BODYGAURD HAD TO PULL HIM OFF YOU😭😭

yan celebrity who gives you VIP tickets every time he has a concert, literally rambling about you to his bodyguard who wants to go home ( BODYGAURD does NOT get paid 😭🙏🙏)

yan celebrity who instantly notices you in the crowd, waving at you, heart pounding against his chest and performing his best at the concert to impress you

yan celebrity who escorts you backstage, and hovers WAYY too close to you, trying to find any and every excuse to touch you (he smacked your ass and told you that he saw a fly on it and he wanted to kill it, there was no fly 💀)

yan celebrity who anytime you try to put some distance between you both, pulls you even closer, giving you more attention, more of him

yan celebrity who literally cries when you finally decided to jerk him off, watching TikTok on your phone as he crumbles into a whimpering mess, arching his back and everything in front of you

Yan celebrity who buys you anything and everything you want, taking you to many country's every week saying that 'Dont worry about it, baby! I just feel like I should do this for my wifey!' (he thinks you guys were married as soon as you jerked him off, you've literally told him you only helped his problem bc he was about to perform and he wasn't gonna be able to perform with his full potential if he was 🧱)

Yan celebrity whose hands always lingers on your arms, loving to squeeze and hold them as a way to show his love and clingyness for you

Yan celebrity who texts you corny shit

--------------------------

Theyluvme

bae this is ur sign to breed me

Y/n_daddysigma

get the fuck out my dms bro

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I_luvy/n_pls_eatmeout_n/n

Y/nis_daddysigma

bro just put the ketchup packets in the bag bruh

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I_luvy/n_pls_eatmeout_n/n

pls eat me out

pls edge me

pls

pretty pls

im going to touch you so good tonight

Y/nis_daddysigma

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GUYS I GOT LAZY ASF LMAOOO

[coulson-is-an-avenger]

also as a note because i forgot to mention this: Hayashida talks a lot about using uneven polyrhythms and competing time signatures and stuff, and while that can sound weird and jarring, i need to emphasize:

he adds those layers so cleanly that i didn't realize it was happening on my first listens.

i picked up what he intended — for the song to feel unmoored or chaotic or tense, but it wasnt until like four listens in that i realized exactly WHY the music felt like those emotions when it did.

his working of multiple rhythms and beats does Not come across as choppy or discordant, it comes across as extremely clean, and that is half the genius of it all and why i bring it up so much. it's not just that he throws together random sounds, its that he makes extremely dissonant sounds seem harmonious. THATS fucking skill.

[ID in ALT Text]

Hello tumblr 💙💙for today, the anniversary of the greatest music album adaptation of Moby Dick of all time, I figured I'd share my powerpoint about why I like it album so much :)

this is both propaganda to get more people to listen to mr. hayashida and also just general proof that i can in fact talk about things that are good.

anyways this album genuinely shook something deep in me and i need more people to be aware of its existence!! it's such a genuinely beautiful, intentionally constructed masterpiece of gorgeous instrumentation and vocals, brilliant composing, and really powerful emotional weight. it is first and forevermost, a worthy companion to the great american novel of Moby Dick. i cannot ever recommend this album enough, and i hope more people will join me down to the seas 💙

[skinnedkate]

c***unitytwt, and specifically a**d fans, are getting on my NERVES. i made a pretty flippant joke that theyre never explicit abt him being autistic despite how everyone talks abt him, and you would think i waterboarded three puppies w their reactions.

[maplesyrupsainz]

˖⁺｡˚⋆˙just say yes | CS55˖⁺｡˚⋆˙

pairing: father!carlos sainz x y/n reader (she/her)

genre: social media au, established relationship

warnings: so much fluff 0 angst just lovey dovey cuteness & fun ! idek if there's much of a plot tbh lol

summary: in which you, your boyfriend and your daughter are the target of everyone's jealousy & you bask in it 😊

a/n: hiii i luv this request so cute & i havent done any carlos fics yet!! i love it he's soo beautiful fr! i've done the baby faceless tbh i felt a bit weird looking for pics hahahah anyway hope u like it 😊😊

request!!!: Can you do like a smau where carlos has a daughter and it's just fluffy as HELL !! And ofc we need lando and charles being goofy in the comments!

fc: various blonde girls from pinterest

my masterlist

instagram ->

carlossainz55

liked by charles_leclerc, yourusername, and 682,674

carlossainz55 vacationing with my girls

view all 11,356 comments

yourusername im soo lucky

carlossainz55 that's me actually. i love you

yourusername i love u!! sm more

landonorris you guys are always rubbing your perfect lives into our faces it has to stop

charles_leclerc i agree it is too much now

yourusername maybe if either of you could keep a girlfriend you could be like us

landonorris cant commit

carlossainz lando you need to grow up

charles_leclerc leave him alone he's a baby

yourusername i prefer the term pussy 🤷‍♀️

landonorris y/n i thought we were friends

yourusername we are it's called tough love

carlossainz55 sorry lando but she's right

user1 i missed carlando interactions

user2 me too so happy to see the carlando domestics continuing through instagram comments

user3 even funnier with y/n involved she's literally just an extension of carlos i love it

user4 best couple in the world

user5 only couple in the world more like

yourusername

liked by carlossainz55, landonorris, and 218,426 others

yourusername he wont even put the ferrari merch down in the off season

view all 4,189 comments

yourbff omg baby in ur sunglasses she's fr a mini u 😭😭

yourusername i know, i've never felt love like it 🥹

carlossainz55 me when i look at you

yourbff take your sickly sweetness out of my replies 🥲

user6 i love how all their friends are jealous of them too😭😭 it's not just us

charles_leclerc he's dedicated 😊

carlossainz55 thanks for being on my side charles 🙏

yourusername ur biased

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landonorris i know you're not talking about me

danielricciardo or me

maxverstappen1 or me

yourusername well i actually wasnt but now i am

oscarpiastri me?

yourusername no never you oscar my fav rookie

yourbff

liked by yourusername, carlossainz55, and 121,376 others

yourbff babysitting duties

tagged: yourusername, carlossainz55

view all 2,893 comments

carlossainz55 am i in trouble in that pic of us

yourbff she was explaining to u that u brought the wrong pickles home for her

carlossainz55 so yes then

landonorris wtf is the wrong pickles a pickle is a pickle

yourusername shutup little lando you dont understand me

charles_leclerc well duh ur a woman his pea brain cannot comprehend women

yourusername ur one to talk!

landonorris 🤐🤐🤐

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yourbff @.yoursister told you so!

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yourusername no wait

twitter ->

instagram ->

yourusername

liked by charles_leclerc, scuderiaferrari, and 302,748 others

yourusername happy first race of the season i love my boys so much

view all 8,883 comments

scuderiaferrari ❤️❤️

liked by yourusername, carlossainz55

user11 omg i love her

user12 this is the cutest post ever

charles_leclerc omg y/n being nice to me

yourusername it's the hormones and ur cute face getting to me ur soo pookie

charles_leclerc what is pookie

oscarpiastri dont ask

yourusername it means i love u 😊

carlossainz55 we are all so lucky to be subjects of y/n's affections so don't question it ok?

user13 omg carlos is so down bad lol it's adorable

landonorris come visit us too we miss you y/n

yourusername well i might. can i squish ur cheeks?

landonorris i'll think about it

yourusername im not coming till i have a yes for sure

yourusername posted a story

liked by yourbff, scuderiaferrari, and 121,847 others

user14 CHILDREN?? PLURAL??

user15 yes y/n we get it ur the luckiest girl alive

yourbff purrrrr

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yourusername not a day in my life

yourusername now let me come squish ur cheeks. charles let me do it

landonorris ok fine.

yourusername YAYYY

user16 most gorgeous man alive fr

yourusername posted a story

liked by carlossainz55, danielricciardo, and 98,183 others

carlossainz55 come back here

carlossainz55 please come back we miss you

charles_leclerc not you sneaking off. is carlos annoying you too??

yourusername you are too mean to that boy!!!!

mclaren you can stay with us!

yourusername poachers!! im much too loyal

user17 omg lol im obsessed

user18 SOO CUTE

f1wags

liked by carlossainz55, user6, and 73,294 others

f1wags carlos after the race with his longterm girlfriend y/n y/l/n today 🥹

tagged: carlossainz55, yourusername

view all 3,935 comments

user19 she needs a ring asap

user20 r how long have they been together now??

user21 like 8 years lol

user22 carlos liked 🥹🥹

user23 they r so personal to me

user24 do u think they know how much everyone loves them & is jealous of them

user25 absolutely & they love it lol

user26 if they ever break up im done with love

user27 idk who's luckier her or him

user28 they're the definition of soulmates

user29 the world will stop on their wedding day fr

carlossainz55

liked by yourusername, yoursister, and 728,193 others

carlossainz55 my perfect family

view all 13,438 comments

user30 stop it 😭😭😭

yourusername how did we create somebody so gorgeous😭

landonorris not you asking this as if you both aren't the most conventionally gorgeous people to ever exist

yourusername HAHAH shutup lando you are always slithering around to ruin our sincere moments

landonorris SLITHERING?!

user31 omg slithering 😭😭😭??

user32 lol at lando's comments he's like us

charles_leclerc let me babysit soon

yourbff why you coming for my job

carlossainz55 dont fight over my child

yoursister miss you guys!!

carlossainz55 we will have to come visit soon

yourusername ❤️❤️❤️

user33 put a ring on it carlos

liked by yourusername

twitter ->

instagram ->

yourusername

liked by carlossainz55, yourbff, and 231,023 others

yourusername night off from baby

view all 6,173 comments

yourbff everyone in the world is in love with you

carlossainz55 right well they need to back off

yourusername tehehe

user37 wow she's unreal

user38 wifeee

carlossainz55 you are so beautiful

yourusername 🥹🥹🥹 i love u

carlossainz55 i love you

landonorris Y/N?? YOU DIDNT INVITE ME??

yourusername ...girls night

landonorris BUT YOU ALWAYS SAY IM ONE OF THE GIRLS

charles_leclerc i wasn't invited either mate

yourusername im so sorry. you guys are grown men though

landonorris no im one of the girls

user39 one of the girls 💀

user40 i love lando & y/n's friendship so bad

carlossainz55

liked by yoursister, yourusername, and 733,984 others

carlossainz55 our week off so far

view all 17,293 comments

user41 i want her

user42 join the club

charles_leclerc is y/n available for brunch tomorrow

carlossainz55 yes

yourusername i am?

charles_leclerc that is fantastic y/n we will pick you up at 11am

yourusername we?

charles_leclerc yes!! see you then

yourusername ?? WHAT

yourbff aww i love my y/n

carlossainz55 yours?

yourbff yes she is mine! tyvm carlos

yourusername hahahahaha

yourusername i love u both

messages ->

instagram ->

yourusername posted stories

liked by carlossainz55, danielricciardo, and 334,756 others

yourbff pretty pretty girl

yourusername yup

carlossainz55 i told you you'd enjoy yourself 😊

yourusername yup

user43 omg the brunch with charles?

user44 so effortlessly cool

user45 looks delicious tbh. you not the food

messages ->

instagram ->

yourusername posted a story

liked by carlossainz55, yourbff, and 123,284 others

user46 brunch & then the beach??

user47 hmmmm

user48 wuu2

user49 charles forcing her to brunch & then this???

carlossainz55 posted a story

liked by yoursister, landonorris, and 892,293 others

yourbff 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹

user50 MY PARENTS

yoursister AHHH!!!!!

landonorris heeheehee

charles_leclerc ur welcome mate

user51 OMG FINALLY

user52 OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG

user53 OMG IT'S REAL!!!!

yourusername

liked by carlossainz55, charles_leclerc, and 792,673 others

yourusername luckiest girl alive

tagged: carlossainz55

view all comments

landonorris congratulations parents

yourusername aww love u our little lando

charles_leclerc congratulations beauties

liked by yourusername, carlossainz55

yourbff my gorgeous girl with her beautiful daughter and some guy

yoursister the most beautiful amazing woman you've ever seen and then.....carlos

yourusername mean girls!!

carlossainz55 no they're right perhaps?

user54 LOL barbie & ken vibes

danielricciardo CONGRATULATIONSSSS 🥳

liked by yourusername, carlossainz55

lewishamilton congratulations ❤️

liked by yourusername, carlossainz55

user55 😭 so happy for them

user56 im obsessed with them.

user57 best couple on the grid period

user58 the most beautiful family ever. SO JEALOUS!!!

THE END ❤️

[beiasluv]

christmas spirit’s | f1 grid

a/n: super rushed but enjoy 💀💀

ynfannss

liked by username, username and 76,727 others

ynfannss NOT CHARLES BEGGING FOR YN TO TAKE THAT PICTURE AS HIS SECRET SANTA PRESENT

view all 3,764 comments

username mans knew that she loves f1 dilfs and went with it

username I NEED to see Jenson reaction

username NO because Sebastian IS her mentor 😩

username I FEEL SO BAD FOR YN 😭

username RIGHT

username NOT WHEN SHE GAVE THE BEST GIFT AS WELL

username 😭😭

username BUT QUEEN WASNT FAZE AT ALL

username NO SHE LOVED THAT GIFT

username I wouldn’t be mad if I was gifted the three branches of government

carlossainz55

liked by yourinsta, landonorris and 524,626 others

carlossainz55 ¡feliz navidad! from the sainz’s 🎄

view all 101,261 comments

username carlos is in spain (without the s)

username NO MORE CHRISTMAS PARTY SAINZ😩😭

username NO MORE SMOOTH OPERATORR

username another one ticked off the list 😭😭😭

username ikr???

username YALL ACTIN LIKE THEY DONT HAVE PRIVATE JETS 👹

username FR THEY JUST HOP ON AND OFF LIKE ITS A FUCKING BUS

alex_albon

liked by landonorris, georgerussell63 and 361,155 others

alex_albon wishing everyone a very happy christmas from the albons!

view all 89,621 comments

username sad day to be an albon fan

username girl imagine being a logan stan

username you’re either american or american. either way, he is definitely back in florida

username ngl I’ll let him spend any day with lily. a win is a win

username get a fucking life yall it’s just a party

username ITS NOT “JUST A PARTY”

username it’s LIFE

charles_leclerc

liked by arthur_leclerc, yourinsta and 861,718 others

charles_leclerc family dinner from the leclerc ❤️🎄

view all 275,255 comments

username okay mr. host candidate, pack it up rn

username WHERE IS THE PARTY MISTA

username so no one is going to mention that yn goes on to like every single post 😭😭

username and lando.

username they plotting sumthinh

username tell me that bitch didn’t lie to us 👹

username that’s mean. do it again

yourinsta

liked by oscarpiastri, carlossainz55 and 861,517 others

yourinsta new player contract?? 🤭

view all 341,255 comments

carlossainz55 ankles still working?

landonorris at least I’m better than you

yourinsta she was a fairy 🤭🤭

username TIKTOK QUEENNN

username YN IS IN THE UK 🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧🦅🦅🦅

username GOD BLESS FHE QUEEN (Yn)

username LANDO???? EXCUSE ME WHO GAVE YOU THE PERMISSION

username so bf??? 🤭😭😭😭

username WHAT IS HAPPENING

username football girlie here but gah daium yn looks so fine 😩

username the crossover we never (kinda) expected 👹

username so…the party?

yourinsta

liked by charles_leclerc, oscarpiastri and 385,288 others

yourinsta happy holidays and making cookies!

view all 86,626 comments

landonorris where’s mine

yourinsta burnt 👹

username SAME RESIDENCE CONFIRMED

username switching sides

username maybe she’s not planning something after all 😔✊

yourinsta SAY SIKE RN 🤭

username WHATHDG

landonorris 4h

reply

yourinsta 2h

reply

landonorris 23m

reply

f1gossips

liked by username, username and 97,277 others

f1gossips photos of the F1 Christmas party parties last night were leaked. lando norris comfirmed as the party host and special guests of carlos sainz, nico hulkenburg, max verstappen, pierre gasly, kika gomes, yn ln, and charles leclerc himself. monte carlo confirmed.

- admin

view all 1,097 comments

username please tell me yn took that picture of Charles

username queen getting back for his present

username no she was a savage last night 😭

username Queen was roasting no one with hesitation

username AS SHE SHOULD

ngl guys, I actually finished the mark webber one first and then the poll shifted 👹👹👹👹

if you guys enjoyed it, any interaction would be appreciated. if not, then why the fuck not? 😘

today’s a great day to get out and take care of yourself 🫶

[etherealstar-writes]

I WANNA BE YOURS | WOSO X READER | PT 13

pairings: woso x reader

summary: in which you're accidentally added to a random group chat, not knowing they're all actually famous footballers, and obliviously end up having many of them competing for your love and attention.

part: thirteen

part one here

✦ ——— ✦ ——— ✦

liked by ellatoone, alessiarusso99, leahwilliamsonn and 5000 others

yourusername: i'm so proud of you guys!! euros champions wooh!! 🤍💙

lottewubbenmoy: 💙💙

ellatoone: tysm!!

alessiarusso99: 💙💙💙

leahwilliamsonn: nahh what is that photo of me ↳ yourusername: lookin buzzin ↳ ellatoone: buzzin fr

stanwaygeorgia: still can't believe you wore that old rusty metal's jersey instead of mine 😔 ↳ lucybronze: it's because i'm her fav ↳ stanwaygeorgia: you wished

✦ ——— ✦ ——— ✦

(doing a bit of timeskip and let's pretend it's been like around two months since the euros bcuz yeah)

✦ ——— ✦ ——— ✦

THE NATIONAL DIVING TEAM

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ guys look at what leah and i found this morning

stairway YOU GUYS WENT WITHOUT ME ?!

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ well i was gonna offer you but leah said you were busy

stairway WHAT NO I WASNT

willlybum oh well that's so sad

earpsy so this is why you were late to training

willybum i forgot we had training

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ more like wanted to forgot

willybum oi don't expose me like that

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ :)) so how's training going

neev y/n save me from this torture we'll go to nandos together and drag jessie along too

the imposter aka y/n ❤️

neev added flaming hot

flaming hot stoppp not this nickname 😭😭 and we can't go to that nandos place anymore did you two forget? we're banned from last time

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ and who's fault was that miss flaming hot

flaming hot i blame niamh for all that

neev bruh you were literally the one that said you could handle the flaming hot sauce fleming and then practically screamed dramatically about how you were dying which got us kicked out

flaming hot I WAS NOT DRAMATIC AND YOU WERE THE ONE THAT PEER PRESSURED ME IN THE FIRST PLACE

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ it was incredibly funny ngl i mean you couldn't really tell the difference from jessie's face and her national jersey colour

flaming hot stop ittt you two are meanies it literally wasn't that bad i recovered fine

neev um you were literally crying the whole day jessie

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ and we had to buy you like twenty iced drinks for you to finally cool down

look this is you finally calming down after your twelfth drink

neev yeah not our fault you can't handle any spice flaming hot fleming but we're still kidnapping you and taking you to another nandos place tonight

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ we sure are

flaming hot i'm gonna pull a houdini

lotte oooh i wanna come along to nandos!

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ you're very welcome to

stairway me too!

neev absolutely not

stairway excuse you how can lotte come with you guys but not me?!

neev bcuz she isn't annoying like you are

stairway

neev

elton no wayy you guys

willybum oh my god i do not have the effort for this today what is she going to say

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ oh no

the REAL karate kid

ona batlle uh should i be scared?

kie very much

flaming hot what is happening?

stairway

elton did you guys know that you can lick someone's elbow (also known as their wenis) and they can't feel it

lotte righttt of course i needed to know this

flaming hot HELP WHAT 😭😭

neev the fact that i just saw georgia look at me after reading that seriously concerns me

the REAL karate kid unfortunately it's true 😭😭 she licked my wenis

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ ..... yeah i have no words

ona batlle 😭😭

steph what the hell 😭😭

rusty metal i wondered why everyone stopped working out and started looking at each other ella, i do not wanna know why you know that, and can everyone stop trying to lick each other's elbows it's freaking me out 😭😭

kie i'm convinced ella has no thoughts behind those eyes it is just elevator music. on repeat. all day. every day.

stairway i think lucy's wenis needs a licky lick

rusty metal georgia get the hell away from me

elton ALSO if you look at any object near you right now you know in your head what it would feel like when you lick it like the texture and stuff

mccard nahh that's insane i haven't licked everything near me so why would i know how it would feel?

lotte why did i just see rachel and millie taking glances at each other

rusty metal GEARGIA ISTG DONT YOU DARE TAKE A STEP TOWARDS ME CAN YOU ALL PLS STOP TRYING TO LICK THINGS WITH YOUR IMAGINATIONS Y'ALL ARE FESTY OMG 😭😭

esme NAAAHHHHH WHY DID NIAMH ACTUALLY JUST LICK SOME STUFF TO CONFIRM IF SHE IMAGINED IT RIGHT THIS IS SO WRONG 😭😭😭

flaming hot of course she would do that 😭😭

meado

steph is this just a daily occurrence for you guys? is this normal?

door knob i'm sad to admit that it is

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ i'm kinda glad i'm not near any of this rn

flaming hot fr

neev well i wanted to know if my brain was tricking me or not

esme you didn't need to lick it tho mate 😭😭

neev

alex nahh i'm done i'm leaving the gym just saw daly start walking towards bright like she was preparing to lick her i can't witness this today 😭😭

kie why am i not surprised that it's ella that started this again?

the imposter aka y/n ❤️

ona batlle amen to that

steph seconded so glad kyra and charli aren't in this chat to contribute to this chaos omg

flaming hot amen fr 😭

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ omg kyra and cha cha! we need to add em in here too

stairway wait a sec y/n YOURE NOT BRITISH?!

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ nopee lived in england almost all my life but proud aussie here 💪🇦🇺

steph ayeee 🇦🇺

willybum i cannot believe this

elton you're an imposter fr

neev and here we thought you were one of us

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ heyy i am an honourary lioness member isn't like lessi half italian?

thet REAL karate kid yeah?

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ see and she's playing for england i can support both the lionesses and tillies

willybum okay but now that the wsl is starting the more important question is which club do you support?

stairway oh yeah

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ oh uhh i gtg do something really important rn talk to you guys later! bye!

neev y/nnnnn dont forget our nandos!! i'll be waiting!!

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ i won't! better be prepared fleming

flaming hot oh no

✦ ——— ✦ ——— ✦

part fourteen here

[choso-star]

jjk men and jobs!!

summary:

jjk men and there modern jobs!!

characters:

gojo, geto, choso, nanami, toji, megumi, yuji, ino

authors note

wow this was a lot more than i was thinking id wrote for my first time! let me know what you think!

CONTAINS! nsfw, fluff

bartender! gojo

-i just see gojo as a bartender, i have literally no clue why i just do.

-just imagine him standing behind the bar, muscles showing through his tight dress shirt, sleeves slightly pulled up🤭🤭

-thats definitely how you guys met, him standing behind the bar on your 21st birthday, your friends long gone partying and you just sitting there, looking all sweet.

“aww look at the little birthday girl layin down and takin my cock so well” all you can do to respond to the man pounding into you is clench your pussy around his cock. “to fucked dumb to say anything? its okay baby we’ll be finished soon and i can send you back to your friends” when you do end up going back to your friends, gojo is back behind the bar serving drinks and your walking out of the bar with cum dripping down your leg.

—————————————————————————

tattoo artist! geto

-i have such a love hate relationship with this man😞

-he looks like he would genuinely be so talented, and so skillful with his hands(🤭)

-his favorite tattoos to do are definitely the more intricate ones he can really put his heart into

-you probably came into his shop, no appointment and wanting your first tattoo. normally, he probably wouldnt have done it for anybody else, but you’re just to cute to refuse.

“hold still princess, it’ll only hurt for a moment” geto says, pressing the needle to your skin, a loud cry leaving your throat. normally, this wouldnt bother him but today its just different. no matter how many times he tells you to stay quiet or for you to not move, you dont listen, you cant help it after all. “y’know what if your gonna keep bitchin i’ll make you quite”

—————————————————————————

piercer! choso

-this man has my heart he could literally do anything to me

-choso is such a sweetheart, he really is, but he doesn’t necessarily look that sweet.

-with his strong build, arms covered in tattoos, several piercings, he looks a little more rugged.

-this certainly wasnt your first piercing, but it was one of your more painful ones, and based on the reviews, choso was your best and safest bet.

-you were definitely nervous but once you saw choso you almost turned around and left. but your committed, your going to get this piercing.

“just lay down on the chair and it wont take very long” you lay down, ‘to late to turn back now’ you thought. as you lay back choso takes his seat in between your legs, preparing everything to complete the piercing. his hands slightly lifted up your shirt to expose your belly button. you would be lying if it wasn’t a great sight. “so pretty, ready for your piercing?”

—————————————————————————

ceo! nanami

-i know, i know “ceo? everyone puts him as that” its just what he is😞

-he looks so good, sitting at the desk in his office, one foot crossed over the other propped on the desk, working on paper work

-your just his little secretary bringing him coffee every morning and checking up on him every so often. i guess you wouldnt want colleagues to know what you always do at your 2 o’clock meeting.

“such a good girl bent over the desk for me” he says, fingers plunging in and out of your tight cunt. “nanamin p-please give’m more” you slur out, then feeling a sharp slap across your ass, causing you to whimper. “if you dont shut up your not getting any of my cock”

—————————————————————————

plumber! toji

-oh god he can come clean my pipes whenever 😊😊 (please send help)

-definitely fucking hates his job😭 wishes he didnt have to work but knows he needs the money bad.

-you would think he would half ass shit to get it done but he’s doing everything the best he can so he never has to come back.

-and then he came to your house, or, your daddys mansion.

“m’better hurry up before your daddy gets home” toji says, holding your hips as you bounce on his cock. “t-toji your too big., m’gonna cum soon- ah” you cried out, but your sobs fell to deaf ears as toji started fucking up into you harder “c’mon baby lets make this quick, we can do more next time”

toji didn’t fix all of your houses pipes this time, looks like he’ll have to come back to finish the job.

—————————————————————————

actor! megumi

-he’s a pretty boy so ofc he’s gonna be on screen

-all the girls want him, he’s literally the josh hutcherson of his universe. constant edits being made of him, always being shipped with someone new.

-what they wouldnt expect is the one he wants isnt an actor, a producer, another celebrity of any kind, but his own personal makeup artist

“hold still megs i have to put more blush on you” you say, slightly sticking your tongue out to concentrate. megumi’s hands find there way to your hips, and pulling you down onto his lap, causing you to accidentally get to much blush on the side of his face“megumi! now im gonna have to redo your base” you whine, but megumi doesn’t care, pulling you into a slow kiss “as long as i get to spend more time with my favorite girl”

—————————————————————————

delivery driver! yuji

-i felt bad for giving him a delivery driver (no hate to delivery drivers obvi) i feel like its so much less glamorous but it kinda fits him😭😭

-yuji is a little pizza boy, driving around the city in his busted, broken toyota camry, but whatever pays the bills right?

-but, hes a broke college student and this is the only way to pay off all his loans.

-its his last house for the night, he walks up to the door and sees you, teary eyed and holding a tub of ice-cream in one hand and a spoon in the other.

“fuck.. you like that? do i fuck you better than he ever could” he said, your pushed against the wall with yuji fucking you at a pace you cant keep up woth “mmmhm.. m’yes- y..uji soso good!” you cry out, tears spilling from your face as he keeps going “good, i’ll fuck the thoughts of him out of your mind”

—————————————————————————

firefighter! ino

-oh my lord imagine this man in firefighter gear, AWOOGA, that hose aint the only thing spraying🥰(im sorry that was so bad😭)

-ino is a caring person, putting others safety before his own, i mean thats his job as a firefighter.

-so when someone sets your apartment on fore, ino is the first one rushing in to help, even tho he has no clue who you are

-he helps you out, and then theres the investigation, but ino is the only one you trust to talk to about what happened! looks like you’ll be spending a lot more time with him!!

“cmon baby im only fucking you in here cause you basically begged for me infront of those police officers “ he says hips snapping against your own, balls slapping your ass. “i only wanna talk to that firefighter ino! cant i talk to ino!” he says in a high pitch tone meant to be mocking you. “well now im here so talk to me baby, tell me how you feel.”

[aliamor]

Thought this would be funny since I finally got to watch the Minecraft stream everyone's talking about with Case, sketch, and Jynxi(I think is how u spell it)

What would it be like if Y/n was playing there with them. It can be platonic or romantic but I'd think it would be so hilarious that case went to the mines and came back up and sketch and Jynxi have only made a bridge and Y/n is no where in sight cause she dropped their dead weight and she's got a whole base built up 😭

Only if u want to though! Make sure your staying healthy and drinking plenty of water 😤

I love thisss, i got youu, literally watching that stream had me STRESSED OUT.

But loove you, im staying healthy. Make sure you all are staying healthy too and taking care of yourselfs🗣️

—

Playing minecraft with caseoh was always fun, but the mix of sketch and jynxzi… wasnt a productive run through.

Sketch and jynxzi would mess around hitting each other as the day gets wasted once again. Case and you running around getting wood and coal and other good resources. Cases many failed attempts to teach the other two shortly ends as case explores into a cave and never to see the light of day ever again.

But you decide to stick by the other two so nothing to bad can happen, but they manage it to be. About 20 minutes into that, your minecraft skin disappears into the the forest that you’ve told them you’d ‘get wood from’. But really sneaking off to set off into different land.

Case every so often comes through his mic to ask you how your doing, and responding back with “good, hows the caves treating you?”.

“Ehhh…not as smooth as i want it to be” he always hums back.

Hour of that going on and off with the constant laugher coming out through the mic because of sketchs or jynxzis funny remarks, they were having fun so thats all that matters.

“You dont seem as excited as i am with this bridge” sketch speaks out to jynxzi. God knows what he means because at this point you’re miles away from them with a nice pretty house built, food cooking up in the furnace and armor building up. But soon you hear that case is rising out of the dust, finding sketchs beautiful four lane bridge. Cases voice rings through the mic, “i come back from the deadlist expedition of my life to find you built a bridge to a cave THAT GOES NO WHERE!!”

Cases hand slaps down on his desk as you laugh hearing it more promptly from the other room of our house, “and where is y/n?? YALL LOST THEM OH NAHHH..”

“I got lost and built a house from where i was” i lied out, though i did build a house its the ‘i got lost’ part that was a lie

“Baby give me your coordinates, lemme come see you” case says, which you do and he goes in that direction for about 10 minutes before coming across a nicely built house, which of course has everything he needs. A basement that can have a cave mining strip, furnaces on furnaces, and a farm growing out back.

“WOAHHH! HOLY, HOW IN THE WORLD??” He says as explores into the house more.

MWAH,

Would kill to play minecraft with caseoh, it would be so fun😭 be safe lovelys🩷

[24kmar]

𝐈 𝐒𝐄𝐄 𝐇𝐄𝐑 𝐈𝐍 𝐘𝐎𝐔 ( A. Donaldson, T. Ducan)

𝐁𝐎𝐑𝐍 𝐒𝐓𝐔𝐍𝐍𝐀 𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐄

𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒: Art Donaldson x Fem!reader, Tashi duncan x reader

𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒: Angst, Standoffish Reader, female manipulator! reader (wolf in sheeps clothing), language, age gap! (Early 30's art, early 20's reader).

𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐘: Art notices how much the pressure tashi is putting on you is changing you.

𝐀𝐔𝐓𝐇𝐎𝐑𝐒 𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐄: sorry this is short 😭

Art was the first to notice it.

There was no doubt y/n was different, soso different. Everyone noticed it, especially art. It was uncanny really, how much she was like tashi. They always knew y/n was like her, but she was still so different from her.

She was warm, compassionate, sweet. Thats why art fell inlove with her, she was different from tashi. He knew she loved him, and not in the way he knew tashi loved him. Until now, now he was reliving tashi all over again.

It worried him, how she ate less, slept less, every waking moment spent on tennis. He knew y/n was a perfectionist, but he didnt think it was this bad. He saw tashi in her. So much of tashi. He saw it in her eyes, how tired she was. But whenever he tried to express his concern, y/n shut him down immediately. Human endurance was on hell of a drug.

Now it got to the point where how she felt about him was determined by how he did tennis wise. Something she was always so understanding about. With y/n it used to be 'win or lose, ill always love you', now it was 'all or nothing'.

Even then, she was still different from tashi. When he lost, tashi would coach him harder, chew his ear off, make him better. With y/n, it was radio silence. She'd just ignore him, stay quiet, thinking. Somehow, that was so much worse. He rather her yell at him, tell him he sucks, than to just keep him in the dark, wanting to know what she was thinking.

Tashi was the second to notice it.

The way y/n became so hyper focused when playing tennis, but so distracted when she wasnt. Playing back videos of her tennis games. Analyzing her each and every move. Picking apart every flaw she had while playing.

Y/n was more anxious. Training harder. Now tennis wasnt a hobby. You know that saying "do what you love, you'll never work a day in your life."? It wasnt like that anymore. It wasnt play to have fun. It was play to win.

Tashi loved this attitude. Shit, she wished art still had it. But it was starting to scare her. The way y/n looked colder, the way she always seemed to be out of it, almost always spacing out, unless it was something about tennis.

She didnt mean for it to go this far. It hurt, it hurt to see y/n's spirit so broken. Seeing the woman she loves personality so dampened. But it also worked for her. It pushed y/n closer to her, farther from art and patrick. She liked that. She needed that. She needed y/n to be hers, and solely hers. But she needed to fix this. She knew it was her fault, the pressure getting to y/n.

What really got her was what y/n said to art the day of one of his games. The day he said he loved y/n. Waiting for her to say it back, needing that comfirmation before a game like he always did. To which y/n replied "prove it" walking away and sitting down. He couldnt believe what he was hearing. His sweet, warm y/n didnt even say it back.

Niether could tashi. It was like she was looking in a fucking mirror. Like she was watching herself talk to art. He knew what y/n meant. She wanted him to prove her love for her on that court. And he did. He won.

Tashi didnt have bad intentions. She just wanted to make y/n successful. She wanted to see the girl she loved thrive. She would fix this, no matter what. Tashi would do whatever she needed to get the old y/n back. That was a promise, and tashi always kept her promises.

[landitolover]

𝒅𝒖𝒍𝒄𝒆 𝒉𝒐𝒕𝒍𝒊𝒏𝒆 in which oscar is forced to go on a dating app by lando, and he finds some..interesting people! ౨ৎ oscar x reader

WELCOME TO DULCE HOTLINE

the app where you are destined to find the one!

create an account >

login <

number: xxx-xxx-xxx

name: oscar piastri

birthday: april 6th, 2001 (22)

nationally: australian

idea type: funny, nice, and pretty

about you: i like cars?

add a profile! >

please wait while we find your matches !

loading . .

thank you for being patient,

we have found 4 matches!

madison rife has requested to message you!

accept > decline

birthday: november 10th, 2002 (21)

nationally: british

ideal type: dorks, funny, and cute

bio: follow the gram!

madison rife

hey! i think you’re really cute :)

oscar

thanks

madison rife

thanks? that’s all you have to say?

i just complimented you and all you have to say is

‘thanks’ ??? you’re not even gonna say it back??

😐😐

oscar

sorry mate?

this person has blocked you!

try again?

yes > no

hailey danes has requested to message you!

accept > decline

birthday: july 25th, 2001 (22)

nationally: australian

ideal type: charles leclerc

bio: everyones a ferrari fan

hailey danes

oscar fucking piastri???

on dulce hotline??? 😭

thats crazy

oscar

oscar who? the grouch?

hailey danes

😭😭

what brings u here tho

oscar

lando forced me

you would NOT

catch me on this

app if i wasnt forced

hailey danes

lmfao that’s funny

😭

oscar

also i’m gonna block you

for my safety

hailey danes

that’s fine!

tell charles to look at my dms fr

Message ❤️ by oscar piastri

you have blocked this user!

report them? yes < no

try again?

yes > no

lando norris has requested to message you!

accept > decline

birthday: november 13th, 1999 (24)

nationally: british

ideal type: smart and pretty

bio: f1 driver for mclaren

lando norris

LMFAO OSCAR

NO WAY I MATCHED WITH YOU 💀

*clears voice*

sup baby 😮‍💨

oscar

is that how you talk

to girls on this app? 😭

cause boy, do i feel bad

lando norris

my number one opposition bruh

and NO?? I don’t talk to girls like that

oscar

you look like a frat boy

in your profile 💀

lando norris

let’s talk about YOUR profile

are you trying to scare girls away?

you look…. 🌝

oscar

honestly at this point, yes

you’re the one who forced me to get this app

I don’t need a girlfriend

lando norris

that’s what bitches who need

a girlfriend say..

anyways bye oscah!!

good luck on your hunt for a girlfriend

oscar

thanks mate…

try again?

yes > no

y/n l/n has requested to message you!

accept > decline

age: 22

nationally: ??

ideal type: nice and funny

bio: delusional taylor swift lover

y/n l/n

heyooo

you seem pretty normal looking!

oscar

thank you, i think?

you as well

y/n l/n

soo what brings a cute

guy on this app?

oscar

oh, well 😭

my friend kinda forced me to get it

y/n l/n

funny story because

me too?? 💀

honestly, dating apps

aren’t my thing, u feel me?

oscar

oh yeah, I totally agree

some of the people are odd

y/n l/n

NO LITERALLY

it’s so scary there r barely

any normal people on this damn app

oscar

exactly lmfao

y/n l/n

you’re normal though 🙏🏼

just don’t end up being a murder x

oscar

yeah, so about that

apparently someone thought

i murdered my girlfriend

which i don’t even have

y/n l/n

sorry oscar I don’t think

this is gonna work out!

i can’t date a guy who shot

his not real gf ://

oscar

oh yeah thats understandable

what a shame though

ause you’re quite pretty

y/n l/n

stop 🤭

thank you

you’re pretty too (can i call a man pretty????)

even if you look a little mean in your profile

oscar

i was scaring other girls away

y/n l/n

wowzers

anyways it’s time for me to

get my beauty sleep 😴

oscar

goodnight, it was refreshing talking

to someone normal

y/n l/n

haha it was nice talking to u as well!!

okay, goodnight mr. shoot a gf that doesn’t even exist ⭐️

also my insta is yourusername

if u wanna follow :p

Message ❤️ by oscar piastri

oscah 🦅

lando

lando

lando

lando

norris

norris

hello

stop hoeing around

????????

landoh 🥸

jesus

ok clingy

what’s up ?

oscah 🦅

landoh 🥸

?????

care for some context

oscah 🦅

i met her on dulce hotline

landoh 🥸

oo she’s a cutie

oscah 🦅

i know, she’s a major cutie

her personality, chef’s kiss

landoh 🥸

little oscah pastry

has a crusshhh

oscah 🦅

I wouldn’t say that

not YET at least.

landoh 🥸

didn’t i tell u it would

be good for u to get that app

🤠

Read 0:30

౨ৎ hello! this is a bit short, but here’s the introduction to my new series ‘dulce hotline’ i hope you’ll like it! thanks 4 reading!

also this is heavily, heavily, inspired by my wife’s (@d6za1) wattpad book ‘chiki hotline’ so all credits to her! and thank you for letting me use the idea of the dating app 🥸!

other mentions, @moneygramhaas @amoosarte @ch3rryknots ౨ৎ

[layanomaly]

HOLY SHIT YOU GUYS????

THIS EPISODE WAS A MASTERPIECE WTF

“The flow of time is an illusion”

THE TIME SKIPSSS????

AND THE WAY EVERYTHING FIT INTO INTO PLACE AT THE ENDDASHJDBKJFV

THE WHOLE THING SCRATCHED A PART OF MY BRAIN THAT I DIDNT EVEN KNOW EXISTED

AND THE TAROT READINGSSSSS?????? THE IMAGERY OF IT ALLL

BUT STOP JEN AND LILLIA😭

MARVEL REALLY SAID WE’LL GIVE YOU A DEEP CONNECTION BETWEEN 2 PEOPLE FOR ONE EP 

JUST TO KILL ONE OF THEM

AKSJHFBKEUFJBAEKRUFGAERF

COME BACK LILLIA WE MISS YOU

BUT WAIT AFTER WHAT HAPPENED DOES THIS MEAN THE SALEM SEVEN ARE DEAD????

ALSO RIO AS DEATH????

I KNOW WE ALL SAW THAT COMING 

BUT GOD THE REVEAL UGHHHHHHHH

IF I WASNT IN LOVE WITH HER CHARACTER BEFORE I DEFINITELY AM NOW

AND AGATHA LMFAOO

SOMEONE SAID SHE WAS IN THIS EPISODE JUST TO MAKE IT CLEAR TO EVERYONE THAT SHE WAS A LESBIAN 

BAHAHAHAHAAHAHA

“I was your moms…….ex-bestfriend”

“You want straight answers ask a straight lady”

“What can I say. I like the bad boys”

YES AGATHA WE KNOW

[juchily]

Yellowjackets S3 Ep2 thoughts

spoilers below ⚠️

I'm laughing my fucking ass off, Mari's scared for her life screaming like an NPC and Ben is talking like a coach again... Honestly this has convinced me maybe Ben didn't set the fire (although before now I also have liked the theory other Tai did it, this just solidifies it a bit for me)

The switch from Ben yelling push to Mari and Shauna digging up her dead baby to hold him... Oh I'm crying. HE WASNT THERE WHEN SHE NEEDED TO BE TOLD TO PUSH AND NOW HES THERE TO TELL MARI! AGGH

Shauna burying her baby in a different place, rejecting the miracle and occult ideas of the wilderness the other girls have come to welcome

Misty the simp of all time

Taivan going to but "not going with them" lol they know Misty's just going to be trying to get comfy with Nat the whole time

Van's arms, that's it

Lottie's being problematic about inducing drug psychosis... Who would have guessed

Shauna actually saying something good about her family for once. Damn who knew all it took was for your kid to commit assault for you to start actually loving them

SIX WEEKS, HOW THE HELL IS LOTTIE OUT TF, I can't complain I guess

Lottie they were cruel af for calling psych on you (it's logical but coming from the YELLOWJACKETS it's just hypocritical) but those crocodile tears... The definition of grown ass puppy eyes. She sniffles!

Callie already ride and die for Lottie... Did she forget she SHOT her... Oh wait, I forgot that's literally Callie's dad obv she's ride or die 🤗

Jeff checking to make sure Lottie leaves to the porch before speaking his mind HAH

Van's got some PIPES, Taivan freaky once again everyone 👏

Walter and Misty are so simp4simp except Walter is the one person Misty won't simp for... She's digging her nose into that jacket and springing to attention AS SOON as Shauna calls... Walter can't believe this girl

wtf is up with Walter in that scene where Misty is talking to him. Dude looks like he's grieving, in depression, and scheming all at once I don't even know

Oh yeah Crystal, they didn't have a grave for her either (or mention her) on top of Laura Lee last episode (and before you talk about that theory that she doesn't exist, I'm pretty sure that's easily ruled out as not being possible)

Nat does not wanna talk to Misty... And she sure as hell is trying hard to hate Ben/look like she hates Ben... My Nat and Coach Ben friendship... I'm mourning

Callie's more afraid of Misty than Lottie (valid??) but this is hilarious she's immediately freaked out the contrast is insane

Nat sees the trap (Ben's) and tries to hide it, so obviously she doesn't actually want the girls to know/think he's alive, im wondering if she's found his traps before or not. Maybe she hasn't and that's another reason she gets super surprised

Anyways more Mistynat 😭😭😭 Nat's horrible at lying...

HOLY FUCK VAN'S ARMS 🙇🙇🙇

Wtf are lottie and Travis doing... Lottie stop feeding his psychosis baby 🙏

Lottie is sooo insane this season

Misty is absolutely failing at babysitting Lottie and Callie. Callie wants to get them drunk enough to talk sooo bad. Lottie IS the father

Mari and Ben team up?

Uh I just ate my words.

Anyways

A NOOSE??? Mari is not having a fun time, damn... She's catching Ls left and right

Now who was that in the bathroom???

These start up bros are super weird... And Shauna's catching them on their shit

They have ducks and bunnies 😵‍💫 absolute art

His name is Mortimer? His name is Mortimer!

Oh Travis deserves so much better my baby ❤️❤️

LOTTIE DONT, he needs a wilderness restraining order on her fr...

Why does Lottie make Travis the test dummy for this "communication"?? I'm interested because she isn't acting like this to any of the others, not even Nat (who sort of has the blessing of the wilderness)

Oh well Akilah is NOT safe now...

I KNEW IT! MISTY'S PLAYING THE CARDS IN HER FAVOUR TO GET ATTENTION. Shauna still doesn't like her though lol

Oh my Lord forget the Caligula dance number they FILMED THIS for a tv segment for the TV show...

Question is, what did Lottie spill to Callie while Misty was out cold?

Callie braiding Lotties hair <3

Misty just wants to have toxic one-sided codependent friendships Walter, what's so wrong about that? 🙄

Well Ben might be a bit insane

Ooo who laid flowers at wilderness baby's new grave?

Oh, well Melissa with her stupid ass boy shorts and that pretty crop top, she's so pretty 😍 her poor hat's gone MIA though

I'm gay, Melissa's gay, Shauna's a girl kisser

Shaunahat has to be one of the most interesting things i have ever seen

Oh they're freaky alright WITH THE KNIFE AT THE NECK STILL

Ending thoughts:

Want more Laura Lee... obviously I'm a sucker for Jane Widdop I would love to see them back on the show for flashbacks, but overall just an acknowledgment of Laura Lee this season ❤️

Is Ben insane? Is he hallucinating or actually talking to someone and we just can't see/hear them?

Wtf is up with teen Lottie?

What is going to happen with Callie regarding the Yellowjackets and the Wilderness?

I'm still manifesting a pig blood orgy like those mean highschool girls 🤷

More Shaunahat honestly 😈 , would love to see more teen Taivan

I don't think Akilah is going to be safe anymore after this episode since Travis just put Lottie on her.