#IT FELL APART SLOWLY AS THE BOOK WENT ON AND THEN IT EXPLODED

[ghosts-and-blue-sweaters]

JUST FINISHED A GOOD BOOK

[sixatrocities]

── homecoming.

pairing: ranpo edogawa x edgar allan poe

content: blowjob. that's literallly it.

wc & notes: 822 words!!

Ranpo was suffering both internally and externally. His sweet boyfriend had gone back to America, and he missed him dearly. Their relationship was no secret to the agency, with the younger detective constantly gushing about Poe to anyone who would listen.  

He was currently sitting in his empty office, laying on the floor with his feet up on a bookshelf. He was wearing donut patterned pyjama pants and one of Poe’s plain t-shirts. Reading the book that reminded him of his lover, Ranpo was desperately waiting for him to return from his home country. 

Right when he finished his chapter, the door slowly opened. “Hello? Is anyone here?” Ranpo immediately swung his legs over his head and scurried up to his feet, stumbling before running to embrace his boyfriend. Wrapped his hands around Poe’s waist, he buried his face in his chest. 

Poe almost fell back from the sudden and rough embrace, but then relaxed into his lover's hold. “I missed you” Ranpo muttered into Poe’s shirt. He pulled away after a few seconds, admiring the swooning face of his author boyfriend. That look of admiration was soon replaced by a glare of lust, as he then grabbed Poe by the collar and pulled him in for a rough kiss. Poe instantly reciprocated it, slightly opening his mouth so Ranpo could slip his tongue in. The kiss was messy, full of tongue and desperate. 

They both pulled away for air, panting as they looked at eachother with the same lewd look in their eyes. No words needed to be exchanged before Ranpo was pinned against a bookshelf. Poe began to kiss down his boyfriend's neck, starting at his jaw. Ranpo whined softly, forgetting just how sensitive he was to neck kisses.

The kisses travelled down to his collarbone, until they suddenly stopped. Poe moved back up to meet his lover's face before enveloping his lips in his own, pulling off Ranpo’s overcoat at the same time. He sank back down, and Poe looked up at the younger of the pair while he untied his tie and threw it on the ground beside him. He did the same thing with Ranpo’s vest, keeping intense eye contact with him the entire time. 

Poe finally undid Ranpo’s white button up and slid it off his shoulders, discarding it to the floor. He went back to the detectives now bare chest, kissing and sucking down to the zipper of his pants. Ranpo whined in euphoria, gripping Poe’s hair before sliding his hand down his back and letting it fall back to his side. 

The older detective reached up to caress his boyfriend's cheek before unzipping his pants and sliding them and his boxers down at the same time. He didn’t fail to notice the wet spot that was already growing there, but now that Ranpo’s dick was exposed he could see the precum bubbling from it. Poe smirked at Ranpo from below and took him in his mouth. 

Ranpo instantly let out a loud whine, feeling the back of Poe’s throat hit his tip. The American bobbed his head up and down while looking up at his boyfriend. Every atom in Ranpo’s body buzzed with pleasure, his thoughts becoming incoherant. His eyes nearly rolled to the back of his head before fluttering closed. His hand once again gripped Poe’s hair as he lost himself in pure bliss. His state of euphoria abruptly ceased as he felt a lack of warmth around his dick and a hand grip his chin. “Look at me” Poe demanded. Ranpo’s breath became more laboured as he winced and opened his eyes. 

He thought he was going to burst from the mere sight of Poe’s eyes glaring daggers into his. When he was satisfied, the older of the two shrugged and took Ranpo back into his mouth. The grip he had on his boyfriend's thighs was mouth watering, and Ranpo was falling apart with each harsh suck he felt. His thighs began to shake and Poe knew what was coming. He bobbed his head up and down at a furious pace until Ranpo exploded inside his mouth. Still whining under his breath, a feeling of ecstasy washed over him. Poe swallowed it with no hesitation, the liquid silk sliding down his throat like honey. 

Ranpo was still panting when Poe wiped his mouth and stood up, as the Japanese detective slowly slid down to the floor. His flushed dick had begun to soften as he continued to catch his breath, his head leaned back to expose his neck. Poe sat down next to him, and Ranpo instantly collapsed onto his shoulder. The American snaked his hand around Ranpo’s back to rub his arm, leaning over onto his head. “I missed you too” He whispered. Ranpo sighed and closed his eyes, leaning further into his boyfriend. Poe smiled and closed his eyes as well, the two now reunited lovers enjoying the peaceful silence.

[weird-person-935]

THE ENTIRE AU

You know that one BO4 campfire scene? The ending? Imagine it, but with Ad. Ad accidentally contaminates the liquor with a drug only he can consume, killing everyone who drank it late in the night, Ad and Dempsey being the only to survive, Ad due to being immune and Tank because he first Drink that night. He had his own booze he drank instead. Not wanting to share germs with anyone being his reason. But that was 2 years ago…without Richthofen…the world has gotten worse. Jumping timeline to timeline using a book they can’t understand. Each time they see their “friends” Ad grows more and more paranoid…slowly driving himself Mad with guilt and drowning himself in drugs and alcohol. Tank desperately trying to keep him from dying at his own hands. Ad is simply a shell of what he once was…his words always slurred and his body weak and frail from never eating more then a meal a week. Dempsey is slowly losing hope himself. All they’ve done is look for the timeline where they fit in best…a new home…a better home….but its been years. Ad is on his last leg. Practically Richthofen and Nikolai mixed into one. They’re biggest fear has always been a reality in this case…they’re the only ones left. And there’s no light at the end of the tunnel. Only fire…and the screams of the dammed.

TW&CW// Death, gore, ED, SH, Suicide mention, Drugs

What Ad saw that night was nothing but chaos. The infected drink took only a hour to cause the effect it had on the crew. It started with Ultimis Nikolai who had drank the most the night. Small coughs turned into fits of practically puking blood, shaking and trembling as he desperately called out for help. Waking everyone from their slumber. By the time anyone has gotten near him, he was convulsing and foaming at the mouth, having torn his own eyes out and almost torn open his own throat trying to gasp for air. Next to fall was Primis Tank. Collapsing and grabbing at his throat as well, coughing up blood and practically having a seizure, his eyes going bloodshot as his mouth and eyes slowly started to drip red. Joining Nikolai on the floor. Now came panic. Takeo holding the body of Nikolai close, sobbing and trying to determine what had happened. Both Richtofens trying to figure out how or why they were poisoned. In that moment Richthofen fell next, as Ad watched in horror, he saw his love practically tear himself apart before ultimately taking the pain away himself, Then went Edward, though as soon as he felt the pain he went back inside his tent, bot wanting Ad to see him spray blood all over, then went the Takeos. Ultimis tearing out clumps of hair and screaming bloody murder as his heart exploded from the inside. Dying with Nikolai in his arms, soon slumping over and leaving a pule of blood toot surround them. Primis Was holding onto his Nikolai tightly. Both of them crying and making promises. As soon As He saw Takeo start to show pain. He looked at Ad and took Takeo in his arms, walking down the hill slightly to finish the job. 2 gun shots fill the air. Nikolai never returned that night…the only survivors were Ad and Tank…clinging onto each other for dear life, Ad was nothing but a mess of a person. Sobbing and desperately trying to crawl to Richtofen’s body, begging to be let go. It wouldn’t be till the morning when Ad would find the cause. his drugs were laying next to the bottle they drank. after that discovery Ad stopped eating and drinking. Only drinking water and eating once a week. Trying to starve himself to join his love. If Tank forces him to eat, he resorts to trying to bleed out. But is always saved by Tank. He feels nothing but pain each waking moment of his life. He wants to die but Tank keeps him alive. Still hoping to find them shelter. Ad knows he caused everything. But Tank wont let him say it out loud. Every day Ad gets worse. Tank growing more paranoid that one day when he wakes up…all he’s find is a puddle of blood…and a another friend gone in a instant.

Throughout the years they spend searching for a new home, a few timelines have kept them safe for a bit. The two meeting different versions of themselves and giving Ad the hope he needs to keep going a little longer. Ad’s favorite timeline would have to be when he found a Primis version of himself who he deemed Opa. Opa was almost the same age as his Richthofen, only off by 2 years, he was a very weird and funny man! Him and Ad had gotten along well, staying up long hours and dancing in blood showers together just like him and Richtofen once did. He felt at home. The two stayed there for a year and a half, Ad went back to a healthy weight while there due to Opa’s cooking skills, he even got along with the Edward and crew their! Not as strong as the ones he loved…but it was strong enough to be unbreakable. Sadly the pair had to move on, Opa giving Ad his coat to keep extra warm and to have a lasting memory while on their journey. The rest sending him off with many hugs and kisses as they entered another world. This time well…everyone was animals! Ad was first to find this out with Tank. Bumping into his fluffy counterpart, both starting to growl and bark at each other, both Tanks having to run over and get their Ad’s to heal. Tank was surprised to see his breed. Both of them circling each each before they simply Hugged and went into a complement fit, the Ad’s soon entertaining themselves as Ad rode his fluffy counterpart like a horse, running around and annoying his crew! Only allowed to stay a day as the Cattofen didn’t like having another Dempsey around. After only a month they were tossed into more and more universes, including one where Ad was a zombie!! That one Tank definitely didn’t like…the final destination was as back down the road of depressing timelines…But this time Ad has hope….walking through the portal holding Tank’s hand tightly, they walk in to find new adventures, new hope, a new life. His soul feels peace as a new dawn is entered. But its only a matter of time…

It’s a dark day for the pair. Its been so long since they’ve seen a happy timeline for them to stay. Ad has started to go back down the path of drugs and self harm, his body so fragile and weak you can see the bones under his skin. he’s so tired, so worn out he can barely walk anyway, having ti be carried by Tank most days and having to be forced to drink perks to keep him alive just a little longer it’s about midnight, the two have set up camp for the night, laying next to a roaring fire and staring at the stars. Its been a long day. Ad was the first to speak that night.

“So…how much longer do you think we have till we find home?…3 years? 2 decades?” He utters, his voice raspy and hoarse, smoking a cigarette and just staring wide eyed into the sky.

“10 seconds.” Is all Tank could reply with. A small confident smile on his face, hands behind his head as he stares into the night, almost as if he’s daydreaming.

Ad raises a brow and looks af Tank, cocking his head ad Tank contines, his smile never leaving his face, soon turning and facing Ad, making his face more smug then ever.

“See? 10 seconds exactly. Because whenever i see you. Its the closest thing i got to home. We’re all we have left…and i think that’s plenty enough for me.” The marine says in a tone softer then clouds in the sky.

Ad’s face turned red as he heard those words, making him quickly roll over and try to sleep, the American chuckling as the night passes, soon enough they’re back on the hunt for the perfect home. Weeks pass, then months, soon enough its been almost 2 years since the journey started once again. Ad hasn’t eaten in so long. He seems so fragile and weak, Tank hates seeing it. After another week or so, the two find a timeline that makes them both happy. Its got everything! A Primis and Ultimis crew! All together, its almost like home! Accept there’s no Dempsey in Ult, but there is a Ad.

The two Ad’s meet and he soon finds out that his Tank had passed a few years prior due to a fatal hell hound encounter, clearly its been affecting that Ad harsh, he looks exactly like him! Though there’s one glaring difference, the other Ad doesn’t have a nose scar, when he does! As the two talk more he slowly starts to realize this Ad thinks that Tank will be staying and Ad will be leaving. With the way he’s talking it seems like he’s trying to hint at Ad being temporary. Which Ad quickly shuts down and makes it clear that him and Tank are staying Together. Not apart in any way, shape or form. Which seems to tick off the other but he doesn’t say anything. a year passes and everything seems to be going well, until one day Ad walks in on Tank kissing the other Ad which causes a screaming match between the two before its revealed he didn’t know it was the other Ad, this was the first time he had made a move on him and that sent Ad into a rage. Tackling the other Ad to the floor and starting a fight between the two, growling and biting, punches are exchanged before they hear a shotgun be loaded. It’s Tank. He knows what must be done but…which one is Ad? *HIS* Ad?! The two immediately start arguing, each calling each other the imposter before Tank just closes his eyes and shoots without thinking, getting one of the Ad straight in the heart, ending his life instantly. The two embrace and kiss, soon walking off as Tank looks back almost worriedly, not fully sure of his choice before turning back and continuing to walk to the group

“ dont worry Liebe, you know who belongs too you~ “ he side with a smile

“ Yeah i know…but uh…didn’t you have a scar on your nose? “ Tank asked, raising a brow a bit

“ me? Nein! Not once in my life. But Eddie did! “ he said confidently.

“ Right…c’mon sugar. Its time for our new life to start. “ he smiles as he puts him on his shoulders

“ Ja! And zhe old one…behind us. “ he says as he looks back at the body, smiling softly before returning to Tank. as if nothing ever happened.

The End

[pervysenpaix]

I love you - KiriBaku X BlackFem!Reader

Hi friends ! I know I'm supposed to be in hiatus b-but @xogabbiexo is a bad influence and forced horny thoughts upon me ! So here is a smut scene from a book I never published here. It's kinda ✨geigh✨. 18+ NSFW CONTENT MDNI - All characters aged up

📷

This is not how I expected my night to go.

My two best friends. The two people that I fell in love with. Those that occupy my every fantasy. They're about to fuck.

Bakugo is laying down with (y/n) straddling him. His hands roam her body and grope her breasts as he licks and sucks on her neck. She moans his name when he bites down on her shoulder while grinding against his bulge.

Her hands are moving everywhere: in his hair, down his arms, across his chest. Every time her acrylics graze his skin, he shivers. It's the sexiest thing I've ever seen.

I knew that they wanted each other. I've talked about with Bakugo before and (y/n) always throws subtle hints. But I never imagined that their sexual tension would've exploded like this.

They've barely spoken a word since they began making out. Carnal attraction and lust overtook them completely.

Bakugo had ripped (y/n)'s shirt, so she was completely naked apart from those thin lace panties.

"Ride my face, Princess" Bakugo growled and smacked her ass, earning a yelp from the girl. He lifts her up with ease and positions himself between her thighs.

Panties were pushed to the side and his mouth attached to her dripping cunt. Her slurped and sucked on her clit and folds, turning the girl into a moaning mess.

"Yes, Katsuki~. Like that..." she mewled softly and rocked her hips against his face. His hands tightened around her thighs, pulling her even closer as he dipped his tongue into her entrance.

The mixture of sounds , the wet sloshing, her low moans, his soft grunts, it all went straight to my dick.

I'm so fucking turned on right now.

Katsuki really did it for me. When he agreed to stay the night my heart nearly exploded. It's like he's changing, slowly but surely opening himself up. Opening himself to the possibility of something more.

(Y/N) definitely is part of that change. I don't know if he was jealous of her or if he just likes her. It's probably both to be honest. But, I'm grateful for whatever caused it because I've never wanted something as much as I want them.

I love them so much. I need to touch them. Be inside them.

I positioned myself between Katsuki's legs and ran my hands down his thighs. He flinched and tensed, they must've gotten too carried away and forgotten that I was here.

"Calm down man. It's just me." I whispered and bent down to lick the precum off his tip making him tremble.

(Y/N) looked over her shoulder at me and bit her lip.

"Ohhh~... Eiji..." she moaned as we locked eyes.

I winked at her as I licked his inner thigh and bit down. He cursed softly under his breath, trying to hold back his moans. Probably because (y/n) is here but that won't do.

"Katsuki, we both know that you're about to be screaming my name in a few minutes so why even hold back ?"

I dip my head down and circle his asshole with the tip of my tongue.

"Fuckk, Red..."

"That's more like baby" I mumble, while sticking two fingers inside him. He shudders and starts to push against my hand. He always takes me so well, such a good boy.

"Hurry up and make her cum so I can fuck you. I know you want some dick." I smack his ass and thrust faster, making both of them moan. Fuck that was hot.

Bakugo inserts two fingers into (y/n)'s wet pussy and starts to suck on her clit.

Our fingers move in a synchronized rhythm for a moment. Me fingering him and him fingering her. I was practically drooling at the sight.

"I feel you clenching, Princess. Be a good girl and cum for me darling" he murmured against her folds.

(Y/N) climaxed on Bakugo's tongue with a trembling moan but he didn't give her time to recover. He lifted her off his face and slammed her on his dick. I know he likes it rough, but damn.

"Shit you're t-tight" he groaned as he slammed her hips against him.

"Katsuki, Katsuki, PLEASE. FUCK !" She screamed, eyes already rolling to the back of her head. His mouth fell open and he watched her intently, gazing at her lewd expression as she fucked herself against him.

She swirled her hips, matching every thrust that slammed into her gspot.

I know she felt good. Katsuki's strokes are long and hard. He'll fill every inch of you with his huge cock. He's about 9-9 1/2 inches and VERY thick.

I couldn't wait anymore, seeing them like this was gonna make me lose it. So I swiftly pulled my fingers out of his ass and started pushing my dick in.

He paused for a second and sucked a breath. His knuckles went white as he squeezed (y/n)'s waist. (Y/N) snatched his hands off her, pinned them above his head, and started to bounce up and down.

A string of curses and moans left the blonde male as we fucked him. I thrusted harder and (y/n) bounced faster. I could see him melting underneath us, completely consumed with pleasure.

"Oh my god. Fuck me. Fuck me please" he begged and rolled his hips upwards. His eyes were squeezed shut and his fingers were intertwined with (y/n)s.

Shit, I could feel myself getting close. They looked so fucking good together. It felt amazing.

We were all moaning each other's names, groaning and screaming.

Our climaxes were set off like falling dominoes.

(Y/N) came first clenching down on Bakugo and smashing their lips together. He cursed and shot into her, causing him to clench around me. It was too tight and felt too good. I couldn't help spill inside of him.

We sat there for a second. Panting. Trying to recover from that pornographic explosion.

I don't know if it was the after sex high or the rapid beating in my chest but my emotions were swirling and I couldn't stop myself.

"I love you"

My Moots | @xogabbiexo. @plussizeficchick, @blkchxrryblyss, @bl--ankhaeji, @luna-indigoduh, @riozakii, @bunnxie, @simpliheavenli, @not-your-damsel, @tsukihime25, @nekojiki, @nasty-quillz, @bookwormsenpai, @po3ticb3auty

[snelbz]

Tempting the Fates {Chapter 9}

Summary: It’s the final semester of Aelin Galathynius’ collegiate career and she is so beyond ready to be done. Her schedule is packed full of nursing classes and labs designed to test her knowledge and hone her skills for the real world and her “big girl” job. However, she needs one last elective to graduate, so she decides to study a subject she’s always been fascinated by: Mythology. Who would have thought that a class about gods and goddesses living complicated lives would end up complicating her own in such an unexpected way?

A @snelbz X @theladyofdeath collaboration.

Word Count: 3378

Chapters will be posted every Wednesday.

Tempting the Fates Masterlist

Shelby’s Masterlist

Tara’s Masterlist 

***Announcement! *** After the completion of I’ll be Seeing You and Tempting the Fates, all of Tara and I’s joint fanfiction will be posted on a separate blog that we run together > @snacmc. Be sure to follow the new blog as we will start posting on there soon!

Hestia

– Goddess of the hearth, home and family

Mondays and Wednesdays always seemed to drag.

Thanks to her lack of Rowan in class, Aelin’s classes were boring and she found herself thinking of other things, rather than the notes she was supposed to be taking. Like the way Rowan’s eyes had been on her as she went down on him in the shower earlier than morning.

At his insistence, she’d begun using his shower for more than just sex purposes, as she’d so eloquently explained to him the week before. She was regularly staying over, getting ready for her own classes in the morning, just as he was. But whenever one of them followed the other into the tiled shower, it was used for practical reasons.

As well as sexual ones.

Suppressing a whine as she thought of the way Rowan had pinned her up against the cool tiles that morning, Aelin crossed her legs and checked her watch. Only another twenty minutes and then she had her break between classes. She wasn’t hungry, thanks to the protein bar she’d eaten just before this class started, and she was close to the gen ed building, so she decided she would drop by her mythology professor’s office. She had a few questions about the homework he’d assigned yesterday and face-to-face was always better to her than an email.

Once her anatomy professor was wrapping up, Aelin was tossing her books into a bag and hauling ass across campus. Rowan’s last class was wrapping up, too, and she didn’t want to miss him before he hurried off to do whatever else.

She could’ve texted him to stay put, but she didn’t want to ruin the surprise.

She made it to his building and dodged by those who were hurrying off to their other classes or their beds, and stopped at Rowan’s office door before giving it a halting knock.

It took him a second to answer, but when he did, he was handsome as ever.

His shirt sleeves were rolled up, the button down tucked into his trousers. When he saw it was Aelin at his office door, a silver brow lifted.

“Aelin,” he began, clearing his throat. “How may I help you?”

“I have some questions about the homework,” she began, voice low, even though no one else was around. “Can I come in for a second?”

Rowan moved aside before she had finished her question. With one last glance down the hall he shared with a few other first-year professors, he shut the door, sealing them into his office. The blinds were open, but on the third floor, it wasn’t like anyone could see the private meeting he and his student were about to have.

Even if he didn’t know what kind of meeting it was about to be.

“Are you on your lunch break?” She asked, leaning back against his desk.

He nodded. “Didn’t plan on taking lunch, but I’ve got a couple hours before my next class. Was going to work on some grading. Why?”

He had stepped closer, pausing beside one of the chairs he kept in front of the desk for students to sit in.

Aelin clearly had other ideas of where to sit though. With a smirk, she reached out and lightly gripped his shirt, pulling him towards her.

“You had questions about the homework,” he breathed, leaning away as she tried to kiss him.

It wasn’t that he wouldn’t kiss her. He just wanted to see her squirm.

And squirm, she did. “You know very well that I turned in the homework yesterday afternoon.”

She tried to kiss him again, but he fell away, even though his arms were around her waist.

“I don’t recall that,” he taunted. “Maybe you could remind me.”

“I turned it in just before I did this,” she crooned, and her lips found his.

Aelin kissed him, slowly, her arms snaking around his neck. She swore she would never tire of the feeling of his mouth on hers.

“Oh yeah,” Rowan muttered, against her lips. “Now I remember.”

It only took him a second to grab her hips and set her on top of his desk.

There was a clattering of something tipping over, probably a cup of pens or paper clips from the sound of it, but neither of them cared. Not as he gripped the outside of her thigh where her legs were wrapped around him, or her hand found its way into his hair. He was both frustrated and very glad she’d worn leggings today. While he wished she was wearing something with a bit easier access, it was probably a blessing in disguise that he couldn’t get his hand between her legs.

Or his mouth.

Or any other body parts.

That wasn’t stopping Aelin from rubbing against him, looking for friction, as their tongues battled and teeth occasionally clashed. She let out a quiet moan and he tugged on her hair, pulling her lips from his.

“We’re not fucking in my office,” he breathed, looking her in the eyes. “It is way too dangerous.”

She nodded, knowing and accepting the fact, but it didn’t mean she was done kissing him.

“Was this morning not enough?” He smirked, trailing his lips down her throat instead of returning to hers.

“It’s never enough,” she gasped. “Every time I’m away from you…”

Her words trailed off as their lips met. It was true. It was never enough. She was so fulfilled with Rowan, and the second he was gone, she longed for him.

“Come over tonight,” Aelin begged. “Stay with me tonight.”

Rowan groaned as his tongue slipped between her lips.

They stayed at Rowan’s nearly every night. The only times Aelin stayed at her own apartment was when she had an exam or homework she had to work on, without Rowan distracting her. Lysandra and Aedion had met Rowan over dinner a few nights before, though Aelin had insisted take out was much more her friends’ speed than a fully home cooked meal. However, Aelin had a lab due the following morning, so after dinner, Rowan had gone back home.

Alone.

“We have class tomorrow,” he replied, lips still on hers.

“So we’ll make sure we get up early.” Dragging her teeth across his jaw, she gripped his shoulders. “Bring over everything you’ll need to come straight to class.”

Rowan hesitated. “I don’t know.”

“We don’t live on campus,” Aelin said, quietly. “It’s not like I live somewhere surrounded by students.”

Rowan pulled back and met her gaze. “It’s important to you?”

Aelin nodded, arms still wrapped around the back of his neck. “I love being cooped up in your apartment. I really do. But, sometimes I wanna be cooped up somewhere else, too.”

Rowan huffed a laugh. “Alright.”

“Yeah?” Aelin asked, a soft smile painted across her light pink lips.

Rowan couldn’t help his own smile forming as he leaned forward and pulled Aelin closer to him as he kissed her, softly. They went on like that, dwelling in those slow, prolonged kisses. There was something personal, something exceptional about a long, slow kiss. Something sensual that made Aelin’s stomach feel like it was going to explode, even though it lacked that animalistic passion they had come to find within one another.

A quick knock at the door had them jumping apart, Rowan dragging a quick hand through his hair, not having a chance to reply before the door opened.

“Hey, Rowan, I was hoping you could— Oh.”

The pretty woman froze in the doorway, taking in the scene in front of her.

It was innocent enough, though Aelin’s lips were swollen from their kisses. That could easily be explained away, especially as her teeth found the bottom lip and gnawed on it.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t realize you had an appointment,” she said, eyeing Aelin, who had thankfully gotten off the desk before she’d entered.

“It wasn’t officially booked,” he explained, slightly stepping in front of Aelin to keep her shielded. “Miss Galathynius had a few questions about the homework I assigned in class and about an upcoming project. She stopped by during her lunch break, since her schedule is so busy.”

Silence built in the office, and after a second, Rowan cleared his throat. “Did you need something, Remelle?”

“Maeve sent out an email about a mandatory department meeting for Thursday night,” she said, slowly, still looking at them both suspiciously. “A couple of us in the building were going to get drinks after, wanted to know if you wanted to come.”

Rowan cleared his throat. “Uh, yeah. Sure. I’ll plan on it.”

“Good,” Remelle said, a little too quickly. “And check your mailbox in the office. It’s full.”

With another look at Aelin, then at Rowan, Remelle left and the door fell shut behind her.

Silence enveloped the room.

Rowan slowly turned around to look at Aelin, whose face was pale.

“You couldn’t have locked the door?” she whispered.

Rowan scoffed. “Yeah, because that wouldn’t have been suspicious, being locked in here with a student.”

For some reason, the word student felt like a jab coming from him in that moment. Aelin’s back straightened. “I wasn’t aware that the receptionist randomly barges into your office. If a student found it locked, they probably wouldn’t think it was weird, at all. Offices around here are locked all the damn time.”

Rowan sighed and nodded. He stepped towards her and ran his hands up and down her arms, pressing a soft kiss to Aelin’s forehead. “You should go. There’s only so much we can talk about homework.”

Nodding, Aelin wrapped her arms around his waist, and he wrapped her up in his own. “I’ll see you after class?”

“I’ll run by my place to grab some things and pick up dinner on the way,” he promised, tilting her chin up to look at him. “I’ll see you later.”

She nodded and rose up on her toes to press a kiss to his lips. Grabbing her bag from the chair, she adjusted her messy bun, which was only a little messier than it had been before and slipped out the office door.

Leaning back on the spot Aelin had just been sitting in, Rowan took a quick moment to breathe before setting his desk to rights and heading down to check his community mailbox. It wasn’t full as Remelle had implied, but there were a few things in it, mostly department memos and notes from other professors. He ignored her suspicious look as he made his way back up the stairs to his office and settled behind his desk to work on the grading he’d planned to do during his lunch.

He was halfway through an essay from one of his upperclassmen when his email dinged on his laptop. It had gone off a few times since Aelin had left, but he’d ignored them, assuming they were automatic replies to Maeve’s email about the meeting.

Tapping on the track pad of his laptop to wake it up, he kept reading over the essay as his email came to life, but he waited until he was done to look over at the most recent notifications.

Freezing, Rowan’s eyes flashed over the subject of the email from Maeve three times before he actually had the nerve to open it.

Meeting in my office after your final class of the evening.

We need to have a talk.

*

Aelin felt as if she had been holding her breath for hours.

Which was exactly how long it had been since she had received her text from Rowan.

As someone who was not nervous or paranoid by nature, she hated the feeling of being so freaked out that she was nearly about to vomit. She had already cleaned her apartment once, and was pouring herself a glass of wine as she was deciding what she could clean next. Maybe she would clean out the fridge.

After downing her glass of wine, she did just that, throwing open the refrigerator door and emptying out what had been in there for over a week.

She didn’t even hear the front door open, nor did she hear her roommate and cousin walk into the kitchen.

“Ace?”

Aelin yelped, jumped, and spun around, nearly knocking over her glass of wine on the counter nearby. “What the hell?” she yelled. “You can’t just sneak up on people like that! Doesn’t anyone realize how fucking rude it is to just barge in?!”

Aedion’s brows shot up as Lysandra stepped forward. “Uh, everything okay?”

Aelin’s face fell into her hands as she leaned against the countertop. “Does it look like everything is okay?” she asked, words muffled.

“What happened?” Lysandra asked, gently prying Aelin’s hands from her face.

Her eyes were still shut, as if she could shut out the world. Taking a deep breath, she released it, answering in one, quick burst. “I think Rowan and I got caught.”

She heard something hit the floor, clearly dropped by Aedion, but Lysandra’s hands went slack on her wrist. “What do you mean?”

Letting her head fall to the countertop, she groaned once before standing up straight and looking at them. Aedion had indeed dropped the bag of pretzels he’d pulled from the cabinet.

“We both had long breaks today, so I stopped by his office to see him for a minute. I didn’t mean for anything to happen. I mean… Yeah, I kinda did. I kissed him first.”

“I don’t need to hear about this. Lys can fill me in,” Aedion muttered, scooping the bag of pretzels off the floor and heading for Lysandra’s bedroom.

“We didn’t fuck or anything,” Aelin sighed after he left. “But we did make out on his desk a bit. It was barely even PG-13.”

“So what happened?” Lysandra asked, getting another glass down and refilling Aelin’s glassed wine and filling one for herself. “How did you get caught?”

“The secretary walked in,” Aelin said, staring at a spot on the hardwood. “She didn’t see anything, we broke apart before the door opened, but… I don’t know. She sounded suspicious, looked suspicious.” Aelin took a sip from her glass. “I mean, seriously, who knocks but doesn’t wait for a come in before they open the damn door? It’s rude as hell.”

“I don’t wait before coming into your room,” Lysandra said.

“That’s different, we live together,” Aelin said, unable to control her chuckle.

Lysandra smiled, but it faded as she shook her head. “That man needs to learn how to lock his office.”

“That’s what I said!” Aelin agreed, and topped off her glass before it was even halfway empty.

“So, what?” Lysandra went on. “She came in but didn’t see anything. Maybe she just always looks suspicious. I’m sure nothing will come out of it.”

Without another word, Aelin took her phone out of her pocket and slid it across the counter. Lysandra slowly picked it up and read Rowan’s text.

Got an email from Maeve. I have to go to her office tonight. Says she needs to talk to me. Sounded urgent.

Aelin had texted back. Did she say what it was about?

No, Rowan had replied. But it doesn’t sound good.

“Have you heard from him since he sent these?” Lysandra asked, setting the phone down.

“No, but we’ve both been in class.” Aelin let her head fall to the countertop again. “He’s supposed to come over after he gets out. But now I’m wondering if that’s such a good idea. What if someone sees him getting here?”

“It’s not all students, and we’re not exactly social butterflies. We don’t know any of our neighbors,” Lysandra said, clearly trying to soothe her.

Aelin just shook her head. “I like him, Lys. A lot. I can see a future with this guy, but… What if this is all too much? It’s too dangerous. We’re jeopardizing our futures.”

Lysandra’s eyes softened. “The secretive part of your relationship is only temporary. Besides, he’s head over heels for you, too. Would it really be worth it to give that up?”

“What if Rowan is about to lose his job?” Aelin shot back. “Lys, I would never be able to forgive myself. I have to do something.”

“Always the hero,” Lysandra muttered. “Look, the best thing you can do right now is stay here, drink wine, and let it all play out. Rowan is a big boy. He can handle himself.” Aelin said nothing, so Lysandra went on. “I just want to see you happy. Does he make you happy?”

“Beyond. Happier than I’ve been in a long time,” she sighed, crossing her arms over her chest and leaning against the counter. “I know it’s only been a few weeks, but… I care about him.”

“And it’s pretty damn clear that he cares about you, so sitting and waiting sucks, but that’s what you’ll have to do.” Lysandra crossed the kitchen and wrapped her best friend up in a hug. Aelin’s forehead fell to her shoulder. “I can send Aedion to get more wine if you want.”

Aelin nodded.

Lysandra chuckled and said, “Then that’s what we’ll do. Why don’t you—?”

A knock on the front door had Aelin’s head snapping up and she hurried from the kitchen. Throwing open the door, she found Rowan standing on the other side. Before he could say anything, she pulled him inside and wrapped her arms around his waist, burying her face in his chest. “Gods, I’ve been so fucking worried.”

To her surprise, he laughed quietly, and it only caused Aelin to lean back, eyes wide. “What could possibly be funny right now?”

“I’m not I’m trouble,” he whispered, arms going around her waist. “We’re safe, we’re fine.”

Aelin blinked, all anxiety fading from her body only to be replaced with confusion. “Why did Maeve call you into her office, then?”

“She just wanted to check how things were going.” He shrugged. “Being new, and her nephew, she just wanted to check in.”

“Gods, Rowan!” She shoved his chest, lightly. “You couldn’t have texted me that? I’ve been a nervous mess!”

“She’s not exaggerating,” Lysandra mumbled from behind them. “Hi, Professor.”

Rowan rolled his eyes. “Hi, Lysandra.”

As Lysandra headed towards her room, he looked down to where Aelin was staring at his chest. He tilted her chin up until she was forced to look at him. His brow furrowed and he was surprised to see silver lining her eyes. “Everything is okay, baby. Why are you crying?”

She shook her head and blinked, but wasn’t able to stop the single tear that spilled over. He wiped it away with his thumb. “I thought we got caught, that I had ruined your life.”

His heart nearly broke. “Aelin…” He wrapped her up in his arms again, holding her as tightly as he dared, as if he could keep her from falling apart. After a second, he leaned back so he could look at her, but didn’t let her go. “Being together isn’t a decision that just one of us has made. We both went into this relationship knowing the consequences. If something were to happen, if someone finds out, you aren’t ruining my life.”

Aelin snorted, and framed his face in her hands. “So we’d both be ruining your life?”

“No one’s life will be ruined,” Rowan promised. “I’m going to be with you, Aelin. Now, and when you graduate, we can have a normal relationship, whatever the hell that means. If you’ll have me, I’m not going anywhere.”

“That’s a big promise to make so early in our relationship,” Aelin breathed, running her thumbs across his cheeks.

“I have a good feeling about us,” Rowan followed, melting into her touch.

Leaning down, he pressed his lips to hers, but pulled back and smirked. “But maybe I’ll start locking my office, just in case you decide to make another unexpected visit.”

Aelin threw her head back and laughed, wrapping her arms around his neck as she rose up on her toes to kiss him again.

The day had stressed them both out, but throughout it all, there was only one thing Rowan could think about: he didn’t know what his future held, but there was one thing for sure.

He wanted Aelin in it.

[rowanaelinn]

Fire on Fire - chapter four

chapter three // chapter five

Aelin slammed her car door harder than necessary, sighing once she was comfortably sitting in her seat. She buckled her seatbelt and turned her head to the man sitting next to her in the passenger seat. "I'm not going to buckle your seatbelt for you, you're an adult, not a child."

Arobynn just chuckled and did it himself. “Always a delight to deal with you, darling.”

Aelin had to take a deep breath or she would snap. Getting mad at him wouldn’t work, it never did. It would just make him mad at her, and it wasn’t worth it. “Call someone else next time, then.” She said as she started driving. Aelin wished she had drunk a coffee before or taken anything that could help her stay awake. Arobynn lived one hour away from this bar, the night was going to be very long. “I forgot, you have no one else.”

“Be careful how you speak to me, Aelin.” His words were harsh even if they were slurred by the alcohol. Aelin hated the part of herself that was scared at his threat. So she didn’t answer, focused on the road, and put on some music to try to distract herself.

Aelin thought about last night, how bad her night of work was until she danced with Elide. Aelin had always loved to dance, she remembered all the times she forced her parents to sit for an hour so she could show them everything she learned that week at the dance studio.

When she turned eight, Aelin started doing dance competitions and she was good, very good, actually. She went to nationals twice, the first time she ended up in fourth place, not good enough. The second time she was in second place, it was better but still not good enough. Aelin Ashryver Galathynius was born with the need to be the best at everything she did, she didn’t understand why. Maybe it was because her parents had always been first in their own way and Aelin wanted to be like them.

After an injury at fifteen, she had to stop dancing. She still remembered crying in Aedion’s arms for an entire night. If Aelin thought about it, she would realize that’s the moment everything started to go downhill in her life. But she tried to avoid thinking about it, if she didn’t think about the problems, they didn’t exist.

“Why are you dressed like a whore, anyway?” Arobynn broke the silence and Aelin’s heart clenched. She hadn’t been hurt when Rowan made comments on her outfit because as much as she hated him, she knew he respected women and just wanted to hurt her. Arobynn never had an ounce of respect for women, he had proven it multiple times, that’s what made his comment horrible. “Not that I’m complaining in any way.” Aelin’s eyes left the road for two seconds to see him with a disgusting smile on his lips and his eyes fixed on her thighs. It took all her self-control not to vomit right there.

“I was working,” she simply said. She didn’t have to justify herself but Arobynn didn’t like to be ignored.

“You work at a strip club now?” He snorted. “Why do you even want to work? I told you I could pay for everything you need.”

He did, and it had been generous. Too generous from Arobynn to come without a price. “And I told you I could do it on my own.”

“Well, you don’t seem to earn a lot of money wherever you work since I’m still the one paying for your college tuition.” He said with a light tone but Aelin caught what he really meant. You’re only here thanks to me, be grateful.

“How many times do I have to thank you for it?” She asked with a sharp tone. Aelin had never been very good at staying calm. “I told you I would pay you back-”

“Bullshit,” he tapped his foot on the floor of the car, almost screaming. Unusual for him to lose his temper. When Arobynn was mad he favored hurting people with words. It was very rare for him to be physically violent. She jumped in spite of herself. “Do I look like I care about the money?” No, of course not. The money he used to pay for her college was like pocket money for a ten-year-old child, he didn’t see the difference in his bank account before and after paying for it. “I don’t understand why you want to work and live in a shitty apartment when you could be cared for and live in a manor.”

“ Your manor.” She said coldly.

“Yes, mine. How is that a problem?” He was angry, Aelin could see it at the way his hands clenched on his tights, the way his right leg kept fidgeting, or at the way he pronounced every word that came out of his mouth as if they were full of venom.

“You are my professor, Arobynn. I am your fucking student and not only this but I am also your teaching assistant. Do I really need to explain how wrong it is?”

“I am trying to take care of you, Aelin. I would expect you to be nicer.”

“Right now I am the one taking care of you!” She screamed, done with his bullshit. If someone had told Aelin five years ago that her favorite author was like this, she wouldn’t have believed them. “Even if I don’t want to.”

“I’m waiting for the day you crawl for my help, Aelin.”

She didn’t answer, instead, she kept her eyes on the road. She thought about her favorite books and how happy they made her. Maybe she would read one when she gets back home, it was too late to sleep anyway. Twenty minutes later, she parked her car right in front of his house. It was big, too big for a single man.

Aelin looked at her professor as he unbuckled his belt. “Have you graded the papers we gave you last month? Students will need them this week.” She asked but knew the answer. He just smirked at her and winked.

“You know me better than this, sweetheart.”

Aelin sighed and got out of her car, following Arobynn. He wasn’t walking straight and somewhere in the back of her mind she hoped he wouldn’t get hurt. Aelin knew Arobynn wasn’t a good man, he was a real piece of shit. But he had been there for her when she was at her worst, he didn’t do a lot but he had been there. He gave her opportunities she would never have had alone. And even if his interest in her was bad, he believed in her. He read every single one of her stories, gave her advice to become the best writer she could be. He let her access his contacts. If she ever made it on the best-seller list, it would be a little bit thanks to this man.

He opened his door and Aelin didn’t wait before going to his study, not caring about what he did. She quickly found the folder full of papers. She went through all of them and left hers and Lysandra’s on Arobynn’s desk. She couldn’t grade them, even if she wished she could grade Lysandra’s, but Arobynn didn’t want her to play favorites.

She turned but found Arobynn watching her at the entrance of the study. He had a glass of whiskey in his hand, of course, he would start drinking again the minute he got home. He walked towards her and she was struck by the size difference between the two of them. He pinned her with this lover’s gaze. She looked at the face she once found beautiful and swallowed. She wanted to move but couldn’t.

“What would I do without you, sweet Aelin?” He purred, letting one of his knuckles caress her cheek and before he could brush her lips she turned her head to the side. This gave him just more room to lean in and place a kiss on her cheekbone, his lips were soft and warm. Slowly, Aelin pulled back. “Tell me what I have to do for you to let me lay the world at your feet.”

Aelin said nothing as she walked away from him.

-

The moment Aelin entered her bathroom she fell on her knees and threw her guts up in the toilet. She could still feel Arobynn’s hand brushing her thigh in the car, could still feel his eyes on her or his hot breath on her ear.

When she closed her eyes she could remember the first time she saw these grey eyes four years ago and how different it felt to have them on her.

Aelin couldn’t hear the music over her friends’ laugh and her own.

When a waiter passed her she took the opportunity to take another glass of champagne and give him her empty glass. Her head was already spinning in the most delicious way.

"Ten bucks says he goes back with him tonight," Nehemia said, her eyes fixed on Aedion and the handsome blond man he was talking to. They were at a charity event, Aelin had agreed to accompany her parents only if she could bring her friends. Her three friends practically lived at home, so they agreed.

“Ten bucks?” Aelin asked as she took a sip of her drink. “How boring you are. Five hundred says they make out in a cupboard here.”

“You’re the only rich girl here, you know that?” Sam asked as he took her under his arm, forcing her head to rest on his chest. Aelin laughed loudly as she pushed him away, trying not to spill her drink on either of them.

“You are so loud, Aelin,” Lysandra complained but she wasn’t better. If anyone drank as much as Aelin did it was her best friend.

“I think our little Aelin,” Sam said, his voice full of fake seriousness, as he took her head in both hands, Aelin giggled at his fake frown. “Is slightly drunk.” Sam finished, and before Aelin could say anything he bent to kiss her. She lost herself in him, putting her arms around his neck. After a few seconds, they pulled apart but Aelin rested her head in his neck, breathing deeply in his lavender scent. She would kick his ass later for using her soap.

“Fireheart?” Aelin heard her mother call, she turned around but tripped on her long dress. Sam caught her before she could fall and the group of four friends exploded with laughter. They had all had a little too much to drink if they needed so little to laugh.

Aelin hid her glass behind her back, remembering that her parents had forbidden her to drink. They didn’t want their sixteen years old daughter to be seen doing inappropriate things. Sam took the glass discreetly and she knew he would get rid of it as soon as possible. Aelin's parents would never suspect Aelin's perfect boyfriend of helping her disobey her parents.

What her parents didn't know was that her three friends were her partners in crime, especially Sam.

“Aelin, honey.” Her mother said as she stopped in front of her. Sam’s hand rested quietly on her hip, a silent reminder that no matter how the conversation turned out, Aelin was not to get upset.

But Evalin was not alone. "My dear, I'm sure you know Mister Hamel?" She asked, knowing full well that Aelin knew him. She had dozens of copies of all his books all over her room, his writing was just amazing.

Aelin turned her head to admire her idol's face. He was handsome, for a thirty-seven years old man. If Aelin was honest, she had always had a thing for men older than her.

When her eyes met his gray ones, Aelin tensed. Absolutely everything about this man screamed power. From the way he stood to the little smile on his face as he held out his hand for Aelin to place hers in. His hand was warm but not soft, she could feel several scars. He placed a kiss on the back of her hand before saying softly, "It is a pleasure to meet you, Miss Galathynius."

The memory of that night made her throw up a second time as she fought against tears. Everything about this memory was painful. She had worked so hard to keep these emotions locked inside of her for years, she couldn’t break now. Not after everything she did to forget.

“You got drunk?” A deep voice asked and Aelin whipped her head toward that voice only to find a shirtless Rowan, arms crossed, watching her from his doorframe. She didn’t secretly marvel at his muscles like she usually did whenever he was shirtless, tonight, another proof of how bad she was feeling. “Is that why you’re so late?” His voice was hard, the same voice he usually used whenever she was around.

“Were you worried?” She asked, sarcastically. She didn’t have the strength to fight now, and yet… She couldn’t help when he was around.

“Your cousin and best friend were worried sick. Are you so selfish that you don’t care?”

“I’ll talk about that with them, then. I don’t need you here.” Her voice was as hard as his, while she usually was more teasing. Aelin saw him frown at her tone but she didn’t give a shit, she needed to be left alone. “But if you want to know, I wasn’t getting drunk, no.”

“Then what were you doing?” He snapped and Aelin didn’t understand him. Why did he want to know that? Shouldn’t he have been happy she wasn’t here? Why did he even come into the bathroom? Aelin supposed he heard her throw up, it’s not like she was a very discreet person. Did he come here just to mock her? “What has put you in such a pathetic state?”

“Get the out,” her voice was weak, trying not to think about one of the worst nights of her life. You look pathetic , Arobynn had told her two years ago. But Aelin couldn’t help it, everything about that night disgusted her. When she looked up at Rowan she thought she saw concern in his eyes but she probably was hallucinating because a second later, his eyes were cold as ice.

He laughed, even if his laugh didn’t have any humor in it. “You know what, Aelin? Keep throwing up all you want. You’re worthless.”

“Tell me something I don’t know.”

There was a long pause and when Aelin thought he wouldn’t say anything else, he opened his mouth. “I understand why your parents cut you off. Who would want a disappointment like you as their daughter?”

“Don’t ever talk to me again.” She said silently, and when he closed the door, Aelin let the tears run down her face. For the first time in his life, Rowan hurt Aelin.

-----

taglist:

@sheharahu // @morganofthewildfire // @thestoriesyoutell // @fromthelibraryofemilyj // @swankii-art-teacher // @itsforeverinnocent-blog // @becarefuloflove // @imnotsogoodatthis // @rowaelinismyotp // @a-court-of-milkandhoney // @feysand-loml // @surielandiareendgame // @live-the-fangirl-life // @story-scribbler // @loves-books // @fangirlprincess09 // @theysayitscrazy

[tomtenadia]

A Little Braver  - Chapter 12

Here we go. As promised i did not keep you waiting too long and chapter 12 has finally landed by gentle concession of Whitethorn airlines. 

Be ready for angst, fluff and our Rowan in full fuss mode. I swear the man invented fussing. Also, our Iceman this time loses it. Even Fenrys is shocked by how much. 

EDIt: forgot to say ATC is Air Traffic Control.

-----------

Rowan had finished his class and went back to his office. He had given those spoiled brats a very intense training and he had taught them how a real pilot flew and was quite satisfied of his level of evilness. 

He sat at his desk, grabbed his phone and noticed a text from Aelin and a smile tugged at his lips.

Not even two hours back. Crash at the airport. I guess those civilian pilots are as bad as you claim.

He laughed to start with but then terror took him. He switched on the computer and tried to find some news about Orynth. He found a newspaper and read the breaking news. There was a video taken by probably some reporters on an helicopter and he almost fell sick at the images. The article mentioned two aircrafts but he could see only one. He had a bad feeling of what could have happened. The crew zoomed in and he spotted Aelin’s engines but he could not tell apart who was on the ground. Then he saw it. The collapse. A cloud of dust and fire lifted in the sky and he hoped that none of the guys were inside.

His heart raced and pure undiluted terror as he never felt, spread through him.

Once inside Aedion had to navigate through debris and remains of the collapsed structure. The dust raised by the collapse had somehow reduced the fire and he could see around him. 

“Aelin,” he called out. He walked and walked and he knew he was getting further and further from the entrance.

“Aelin… answer me, damn it.” He shouted over the silence. A few electric cables flew over him and he ducked just in time to avoid electrocution.

Then he heard it. Her PASS alarm. The one that activated when it did not sense motion for a certain amount of time. He hated that sound because it meant that one of them was in danger.

Eventually he saw her body and flames too close for comfort.

“Chief, lieutenant. I have her. Have EMTs on standby.” he shouted over the radio.

“Lieutenant, Chief, we have two water lines coming in now.”

He ran to her and fell to his knees working to clear the debris from on top of her and once free he rolled her over and noticed she was not breathing and not wearing her mask which lay abandoned at her side. His finger went to her neck and found a pulse albeit weak “She is not breathing, I need the medical team inside. Now.” He shouted over the radio with panic thick in his voice.

He gave her a few rescue breaths “please… please… don’t do this to me. Please, Aelin.”

He put his mask on her face, trying to pass some oxygen to her.

Voices broke the silence but he was too busy helping Aelin to bother to look who it was. 

In a moment the rest of the team had followed inside and they were putting off the remaining fire around them, allowing the medical team to do their jobs safely.

Lysandra was on her knees in an instant. Elide was at his side and Dorian was towering over them he was the one who had taken the two women inside.

“She is not breathing and her pulse is weak.” Said Aedion, his voice cracking “Help her, please.”

Lysandra did some checks with experienced efficiency.

“I need to intubate her, Aedion remove the mask when I tell you so.”

Lysandra got ready with all her gear “now.”

With the skills of someone who had done it a million times she intubated Aelin very quickly and Elide started to press the balloon to send air in her lungs and oxygen to her body. Lysandra did a quick check and noticed her right arm bore some bad burn marks. She wrapped the wound as best as she could with temporary bandages.

“Dorian, pass me the backboard.”

Within minutes Aelin was loaded on the board and carried outside. The remaining team stopped, staring at their captain unconscious.

Rowan was following the livestream of the accident when he noticed Dorian’s holding a board with someone on and on the other side a tall blonde man: Aedion. He looked a bit better and his heart sank. His eyes recognised the body on the gurney. Her blonde hair, her long braid.

All of a sudden he forgot how to breath. He just stood there watching as the gurney that carried her was lifted into the ambulance. Aedion jumped in as well and he saw Lysandra and Elide climb in the ambulance and drive away with crazy speed and sirens wailing.

He stood slowly, as in a daze, grabbed his stuff and left. He went home, packed all his belongings and drove back to the base. As quickly as possible he filed a flight plan and not long after he was in the air. He would explain everything to the school commandant but he had to go. He had to be with her.

The flight back to Orynth seemed to last forever. He swore loudly when on approach to Orynth he was told that the airspace above the city was closed. He was furious, the airbase was so far away from the airport that it was stupid.

“Orynth main, Typhoon FF9762, I am requesting clearance for landing at the airbase, not at your stupid airport. So you let me land this plane or when I ran low on fuel I will land in the middle of the motorway and then you can deal with that.”

A moment later he got clearance for landing and when his landing gear touched down on the runaway he quickly taxied inside the hangar.

When he opened the canopy, Lorcan was there waiting for him “don’t. I don’t fucking care about the school or anything else right now.” He grabbed his bag and quickly told his engineer to perform his post flight checks. It was totally against the rules but he had no time to lose.

“Elide texted me. They took her to Orynth general. It was the closest one. She says it’s bad.”

Rowan ran out of the hangar and to his car not even bothering to change out of his jump suit, threw his stuff in the back seat and drove like a madman to the hospital. Once inside the A&E he spotted some familiar faces. Her squad was all there, waiting for an update. Rowan stopped. Then his gaze crossed Aedion’s. The man walked to him and Rowan was sure he had been crying.

“How is she? Where is she?” His voice was shaky.

“We don’t know. They took her in urgently. When I found her, she was not breathing and her oxygen tank was dead. She was unconscious when we brought her in, and with some horrible burns on her right arm.”

Rowan sat down heavily on a chair, his hands shaking visibly. They had just found each other. He could not lose her. 

“I thought you were in Doranelle.” Aedion’s voice was flat and his eyes fixed on the doors where they had taken Aelin.

“Aelin sent me a text saying you guys had a call at the airport.” His hand ran nervously through his short hair “then I checked the news and there was a livestream of the accident. And I saw it. All. And when I saw you and Dorian carrying her out… I left everything and flew here with my jet. Bloody ATC almost prevented me from landing.”

“This is always the worst part.” Said Aedion sitting beside Rowan “the waiting.”

The whole group remained in silence and Rowan did the same until a doctor went to them and Aedion stood, followed by Dorian.

“I have an update on the captain. Her condition is critical. She suffered serious internal injuries from the collapse and they are being treated now. Her right arm has some severe burns and again they are now being treated to avoid infection. Her oxygen levels are still below the normal parameters. During surgery she has coded twice, but we got her back. As soon as the team is done with her we will move her to the ICU. We need to keep her under strict control. She could still develop acute respiratory syndrome. She will stay intubated and heavily sedated.” Then the doctor turned to Aedion “I will let you know when you can see her.” And with that he walked away.

“Everyone, return to the station. We are still on duty.” Aedion ordered his men. They gave him a hug and asked to keep them posted. He knew that it had been very hard for them to obey him. They all wanted to be there for her but slowly they filed out leaving him alone with Rowan.

Dorian patted his shoulder “I will stay with them at the station.” And he left with the rest of the squad. 

“The scene at the airport seemed terrifying.”

“It was,” said Aedion in a flat tone “the small plane got reduced to smithereens. How the fuck that happened?”

Rowan sighed, he had an idea “possibly a mistake by ATC. They probably directed the smaller aircraft on the wrong runaway and the big plane landed and just crashed on it, then lost control, probably lost its landing gear and just slammed into the hangar bay.”

“How do you know?”

“Watching the live of the news. You could see that the bigger aircraft was on a landing trajectory from its heading. Also, it was on the runaway that Orynth airport uses for landing. The smaller craft was totally in the wrong runaway.”

“Well, it was a mess.”

“Did you manage to save anyone?”

Aedion nodded “all the people in the big aircraft. As soon as we arrived Aelin told us to keep an eye on the wings for fuel. The aircraft exploded but not before we managed to evacuate the passengers. Manon and Asterin saved two of the civilians by hiding in the cockpit.” He sighed “Aelin saved four.”

Rowan chuckled “she took two of my books one on flight theory and the one on airplanes in general.”

“That is why she knew about fuel being in the wings.”

Rowan nodded with pride “Aelin and I… we are working on things. On us. I…” he lowered his head “I care about her… a lot.”

Aedion leaned back on the chair and removed his fire jacket, remaining in his t-shirt “she can be difficult and believe me there is no one but me who knows just how much. I grew up with her. She is my cousin after all, but I always loved her like a sister. But Aelin has the bad habit of saying what she thinks and we had so many fights because of that. She can be a brat, but together with Lys they are the two most important women in my life.”

Rowan smiled briefly at Aedion’s description of Aelin. It was perfect.

“I proposed to Lys.” Confessed the blonde man.

Rowan slapped him hard on the shoulder “that is an incredible news. Congratulation, man.”

“I thought it was time. Lys and I have been together for three years and I love her.”

Rowan was about to add something when they saw the doctor approach them.

“Aedion, you can see her now.” The man stood and gestured to Rowan to follow him.

“Family only.” Said the doctor when he noticed Rowan stand.

“He is coming as well, Sorscha. And if anyone has any problems, they can take it up with me.”

The woman lifted her hands in yielding gesture “She is on the sixth floor in the ICU, room 46.”

“Thank you.”

“Are you all this friendly with doctors?”

“We visit hospitals a lot.” He added sadly.

Aedion walked to the stairs and Rowan chuckled “not you too…”

“What?”

“What’s with you guys and lifts?”

Aedion laughed “you posh boy can take the metal trap. I am walking.”

Rowan huffed and followed Aedion up the stairs. He was not letting an army guy beat him. He had pride.

Rowan pushed to keep up with Aedion and by the time they reached the sixth floor his legs were killing him, the man in front of him had kept a brutal pace, probably on purpose.

In silence they reached the room and Rowan pulled aside “you go in first, you are family.”

Aedion nodded and Rowan sat down on the chairs outside the room. Thing was… he needed time. He was scared of what he would see on the other side of the door. He was terrified.  She was the one with the scary job. He was the one who knew how to fly away from danger and avoid being shot out of the sky. She, on the other hand, she would willingly face a fire to save people. Getting involved with her meant going through the hell he was living now. He fought it for as long as he could. But somehow along the way he had fallen for her pretty badly. He closed his eyes and leaned his head against the wall.

Much later on he felt a hand on his shoulder “you can go in now.”

Rowan turned his head to the door and his heart sank. Then he stood and mustered all the courage he had to open the door and step in.

The room was silent apart from the steady beeping sounds of the machines monitoring her heartbeat and the hush sound of the ventilator pumping air in her lungs. He froze and closed the door behind him. He stared at her immobile body. With all the cables and tubes and machinery, she seemed so small in the hospital bed.

He finally took a step closer and sat down on the chair beside her.

“Hi,” his voice broken as he felt tears streak down his cheek. Gently he brushed the tip of the fingers on her right hand and noticed the heavy bandaging on the whole arm.

“You scared the shit out of me.” He whispered, his head leaning on the bed near her hand “A part of me wants to bolt because I am not sure I can take it. But the other side tells me not to. Tells me that the recklessness, you fierceness and bravery are why I am so damn crazy about you.” He stood and paced back and forth “the idea of losing you paralyses me with fear.” He took a step backward with fear gripping his heart “I can’t do this. I am so sorry. I just can’t.”

He ran out of the door but Aedion blocked him “that was quick.”

“I can’t…”

Aedion’s face morphed into pure rage and grabbed Rowan’s jump suit by the collar “oh yes you can. I told you before, posh boy. You break her heart and I break you.”

Rowan collapsed exhausted on the chair and took his head in his hands “I can’t… I can’t go through that hell a second time.”

“What to you mean?” Asked the blonde man.

Rowan looked up and met Aedion’s eyes. So much like Aelin’s. They could have easily been twins.

“The pain…” he paused “I can’t deal with that pain again. Losing Aelin would break me definitely. And at the same time I can’t leave her for the same reason. I need her in my life. She might be infuriating but at the same time I am mad about her.”

“Then you have your answer.” Said Aedion flatly.

Rowan stood and Aedion placed his body in front of him.

“I am not bolting. I need to go home, shower, clear my head and I will be back.”

“You bolt, and I will find you.”

Rowan raised his hands and walked away in silence.

He got home, dumped his bag near the bed and shed his clothes on his way to the bathroom. Opened the water and dove under the jet, the water hot to the point of being painful. He stood there. Eyes closed and head bowed. Realising that the water would not be able to wash away the shame of him almost walking out on her like a coward. Again. He was not as brave as he thought. When it came to his feelings he was a disaster. But there was deep terror in him, to a level that he never experienced not even with a missile trained on him. He had almost lost her and at the thought he struggled to breath for a moment. He leaned against the wall and allowed the tears to flow, he allowed himself to cry and let his fears go for a moment. He could not believe that in a matter of few months she had become so important that the thought of losing her would break him this much. He breathed deeply and tried to regain some focus.

Quickly, he washed himself and then walked out with a towel around his waist and padded to the bed to grab his phone. He called the commandant of the school in Doranelle and explained him what happened, why he had to leave all of a sudden and most of all why he was not going back. The man was not happy and he was going to catch hell from Lorcan as well but he did not care. He had given up too much of his life to the force. Now it was his turn to be selfish and put his life before duty.

As expected Lorcan called him not long after and he was now on his way to see his CO in nothing but jeans, a polo shirt and a black leather jacket and a pair of sunglasses. If he had to piss off Lorcan better do it properly.

He knocked once in front of his door and the grumpy tone of the man of the other side told him to enter. He saluted lazily and definitely did not miss Lorcan’s stare of disapproval at him appearing in front of his CO in civilian clothes.

“You seem to have misplaced your uniform.”

“No sir, definitely at home in my wardrobe.”

Lorcan growled his disapproval “I got an interesting call from the commandant of the school in Doranelle. He says that you resigned your post. That you have no intention of going back.”

“That is correct,” and Rowan sat down although Lorcan did not give him permission to do so.

Lorcan threw a folder on his desk “and I got a complaint from ATC saying that you breached airspace lockdown last night and threatened to land on a motorway if they didn’t let you land.”

“That was bullshit on their part. The airbase is on the opposite side of the city compared to the airport. There was no risk for me to get anywhere close to the airport. They were aware of my flight plan and my heading. It was total bullshit.”

“Well, now I have to deal with an irate traffic control supervisor and an outraged commandant at a school with which we have been cooperating for years.”

Rowan shrugged in challenge “not my problem.”

“No Whitethorn, you are the fucking problem.”

“Then suspend me, like I give a fuck.” Rowan leaned back in the chair and stared outside ignoring Lorcan’s tantrum.

“You broke aviation rules with that stunt of yours last night and before that you put your personal life before duty.”

Rowan bolted on his feet “I am so fucking tired of sacrificing my life for duty. I did it so much that when my wife died I was on the other side of the continent and I was given a couple of days of leave to go to her funeral and then was ordered to haul ass back to my post as if nothing happened and like the good obedient soldier I was, I even thanked you all for giving me two days to mourn.” He shouted, not caring if he was being disrespectful to a superior “I gave the airforce twelve years of my life, no questions asked. And all of a sudden I am not sure if I want to keep doing it.”

“Is she really worth it? Is that woman really worth giving up on your career?”

Rowan moved dangerously close and leaned on the desk with his hands “she is worth more that you cold-hearted bastard can ever imagine.”

Lorcan stood “get your arse out of my office, captain Whitethorn. You are suspended for a month.”

“Good.” Said Rowan and walked out slamming the door not bothering saluting Lorcan or add anything.

On his way out he met his squadron “what are you doing back in Orynth?” Asked Gavriel surprised.

“Getting my arse suspended for a month apparently.”

“What the fuck?” Fenrys stared at him in disbelief. That was something that he would do. He could not believe that Lorcan had just suspended Rowan. The man was a stickler for protocol and rules to a fault.

“Broke aviation rules last night by landing during an airspace lockdown. Ticked off ATC big time. And before that I left my post in Doranelle without telling anything to anyone.”

“Who are you and what have you done with Iceman?” Asked Connall.

“Aelin.” Was his answer “she was at the disaster at the airport last night. She is in bad condition. I had to come back.” He sighed “then Lorcan gave me a dressing down for putting a woman before duty and I might have pissed him off to historical levels. I would stay clear of him today.”

“And he suspended you.”

“Yes,” confirmed Rowan and the rest of the team almost noticed relief in his eyes.

“But you are coming back, right?” Rowan noticed sadness in Gavriel’s eyes. The two had been friends for a long time. And although he could not care less about Lorcan, he felt as if he was betraying his team mates.

“I don’t know… I might.” He said not convinced “A month away might do me well. I am not sure right now.”

“How’s Aelin?” Vaughan had the guts to ask the question no one could voice.

Rowan’s hands fisted “she is in bad shape. Intubated and sedated. When Aedion found her she was not breathing. She has bad burn on her right arm and plenty of other injuries. She was buried under the collapse of the hangar after she tried to save some people trapped inside.”

“Damn, the woman is badass.” Fenrys patted Rowan’s shoulder “when you go to the hospital, tell her that we are rooting for her too.”

He covered the young man’s hand with his “will do.” Then he straightened “now I better go, before Lorcan comes through and punishes all of you just for speaking with me.”

“Keep in touch, please,” added Gavriel.

Rowan winked and left and once he finally stepped outside of the perimeter of the airbase his soul felt lighter.

He reached the hospital not long after and found her room empty, her team was probably at work and he was glad he could have some time with her.

“Hi menace,” Rowan sat down and brushed a kiss on her forehead “are you enjoying your nap?” His finger gently flicked her nose and he sat back down “I got suspended for a month… I guess I broke a few rules to be with you.” His finger brushed hers emerging from the heavy bandage “and I epically ticked off a few people, but it was so worth it.” He squeezed her fingers “you are totally worth it.” He then stood and started walking around the room making adjustments. He fixed the blinds so there was some sun in the room, he tucked her properly in bed, almost afraid she could be cold. He fixed the flowers on her nightstand and made sure they had water. And finally he sat down on her bed and slowly undid her braid, brushed her hair and braided it again.

“I am sorry I left this morning, I… was overwhelmed.” He sat back down on the chair “I am not leaving. Not unless you want me to.” He grabbed her hand again but then he heard the door open and he sat straight.

“Hi,” said Lysandra and Elide in unison.

“We just dropped off some patients and we came in to see her.”

Rowan stood and with his hand he offered his spot to the two women.

“I thought you were away.” Said Lysandra, walking close to her friend and depositing a gentle kiss on her forehead.

“I was, and then I saw the disaster and I flew back and got myself suspended for it, but I don’t care.”

Lysandra was about to comment but he stopped her “I had to be here for her. I have no regrets.” His head then turned to Elide “you might want to stay clear of Lorcan for a few days. I ticked him off big time and the man might be a bit furious at the time.”

“Oh, okay,” the woman said timidly.

“I am sure that one of your smile will fix the mood of that poor old bastard.” Lysandra’s comment made him laugh.

“She just went in…” Lysandra’s voice was now a whisper and she sniffled turning her back from the other two occupants “she always does this type of crazy thing. Dorian was furious.”

A memory appeared in Rowan’s mind and his words were out before he could stop them “are they involved?”

He heard the woman chuckle “No. Dorian is in love with her and that is no secret. He was her captain when she was at west. But she always saw him as nothing but a friend. Also he is the chief and she a captain, so nothing can happen. They are really good friends, but no, nothing ever happened.”

A selfish part of him relaxed.

Lysandra’s radio went off and she groaned “come on Elide, back to work.”

Rowan waved them goodbye and went back to his chair.

***

Ten days had passed and the season had slowly turned and spring was now in full force.

Rowan was standing at the hospital window, looking outside towards the Staghorn mountains. The tops had officially lost their snow. He inhaled the fresh air and closed the window again. That room had become his new home in the past ten days. He had left only to go home and get changed and washed, but apart from that he had kept a tight vigil on her. They guys at the station had to work and he had been more than happy to keep her company. He was out of a job for the time being, anyway. He turned around and walked to the bed. Nothing had changed. She was still intubated and still unconscious. The doctor had raised concerns with regards to the damage her lungs had suffered and a neurologist had confirmed that her responses were within normal parameters and that they were expecting her to wake up soon. In the last few days they had noticed an increased cerebral activity which according to the doctors was a good sign. He sat down again beside her and went back to the book he had been reading to her. As a joke between the two of them he had started reading flight manuals, or any of any of his books about flying. He had read her other books as well and all the possible articles about their amazing rescue at the airport. Rowan had spent so much time at the hospital that all the nurses knew him and helped him every time he had a request for them to make her more comfortable. He had brought more comfortable pillows, had decorated the wall of her room with all the cards she got from the different fire stations and from west, together with the ones of the four people she save in the hangar. With his mobile he had played classical music for her and a few times he had played an opera as well and joked that they finally got that date after all. His past ten days had been dedicated to nothing else but her. He was humming away a tune from the last opera he had played, while tucking her bed sheets properly when he brushed her hand and felt it move. It was a subtle movement but he felt it. Rowan kept humming and this time the motion was much clearer.

“Aelin…” her middle finger lifted by a fraction and Rowan laughed.

“Are you giving me the middle finger even when you sleep? You are such a brat.” He leaned forward and kissed her forehead “Can you hear me?” He whispered near her ear.

His gaze returned to her hand and this time he noticed her clearly trying to bend her fingers.

Rowan sat down beside her and stroked her cheek once more “Aelin… it’s me.”

A tiny flutter of her eyelashes had his heart race madly in his chest. And when her blue eyes finally set on him he gave her a big smile “it was abut time, there was no need to get into a fire and almost get yourself killed if you needed a nap.”

Aelin groaned and he noticed the middle finger in her left hand rise sightly. Rowan roared in laughter. Then she lifted the same hand and went for the tube in her mouth.

“Hold on, you are still intubated. Let me go and call the doctor.” He disappeared outside of the room and came back with her doctor a moment later. He extubated her and the procedure looked very unpleasant. Aelin coughed heavily but the doctor reassured him it was normal and then left the two alone.

Rowan grabbed a glass of water on the nightstand and helped her. He lifted her a bit and pressed the glass against her lips “drink a little.”

She drank eagerly and then collapsed back on the pillow exhausted. Rowan sat at her left side and brushed her head gently with his hand “are you in pain?”

With a small movement she shook her head. Rowan looked at the bags with liquids hanging behind her and noticed they still had plenty of stuff in them. She was hooked on painkillers and antibiotics and had a feeding tube down her nose.

“You… here.” She managed with difficulty. Although she was breathing on her own the doctor had warned him that some issues might take longer to heal. The smoke and the fuel fumes had battered her lungs pretty badly and that it was why after extubation, the doctor had placed small oxygen tubes in her nose.

“That I am.” he took her hand in his “after your text complaining about civilian pilots I had a look at the news and they were showing the inferno at the airport.” He stopped, he would never forget that horrible scene “when I saw Dorian and Aedion carrying you out I realised I could not stay there any longer. Long story short, I broke a few rules, pissed off a few people and got suspended, but I am where I am meant to be.”

“Suspended?”

Rowan nodded solemnly “Turns out that even if he has a girlfriend, Lorcan is still a cold-hearted bastard. I have no regrets.”

Aelin sighed and her breath came out ragged “squad.”

“They are all fine and they miss you. Aedion has been playing captain and he hates it and Dorian has been helping a lot as well. They are on shift now but they came and visit a lot.”

She was about to say something else but a brutal cough hit her and she was left exhausted and wheezing and he pulled her to him. It destroyed him seeing her like that.

He shifted the pillows behind her and allowed Aelin to be in a semi sit position, hoping that would make breathing much easier than lying down. He sat beside her, pulled an arm around her shoulder and dragged her closer to him “Aedion proposed to Lys.”

“Know.”

“There is no pleasing you, young lady. I assume Lys has told you.”

Aelin smiled at him and nodded.

His phone buzzed in his pocket and when he removed it he realised it was Lorcan. The man had tried to phone him all morning but he had refused every single call.

Rowan sighed heavily and Aelin looked up at him with a worried expression.

“I almost resigned.” His forehead touching hers “then I didn’t because of duty and all that shit. When they carried you out I lost it. Nothing else mattered but being here for you. Screw rules and regulations.”

She turned her head and deposited a kiss on his lips “thank you for being here.” She managed with great difficulty.

***

With spring in full swing, Orynth was covered in colours from flowers all around the city. The air smelled sweet and warm.

Aelin inhaled the fresh air and after almost a month in the hospital she felt alive again. Rowan lifted her in his arms and slowly carried her to her house. Her legs were still shaky and she was still weak. Her recovery was taking longer than expected. The doctors had put her through a respiratory therapy, but at times she still felt short of breath. Rowan dropped her off on the sofa and went to get their stuff. He had made a deal with her and he would stay with her until she was better. He still had four days before his suspension was over. He had been at her side since she woke up and the nurses had told her that even when she was still unconscious, Rowan had barely left her side.

Her mind went back to when he told her he could be very caring for the people he loved and he had showed her that over and over again.

“Here we go.” He dumped all the bags in the living room and then went to the bedroom and Aelin had a feeling he was preparing so that it was up to his standards.

“The bed is ready, your highness.”

He fussed. He fussed a lot but she realised she had started to love that side of him.

“Does it meet your standards, captain?”

He grinned “I don’t think is grandiose enough.”

“I will make sure I’ll upgrade my living standards to accommodate a posh boy like yourself. I doubt an army guy will fuss. Aedion never did.”

“They have no standards to begin with.”

Aelin threw a pillow at him but Rowan ducked in time and an instant later she was in the air and he dumped her on the bed with little ceremony.

He leaned forward and kissed her “now get changed,” he ordered and threw her her bed clothes.

“Yes, sir. At your orders sir,” she mocked him with a funny salute.

He shook his head “you civilians really have no respect for rank.”

She stood on her knees in bed and shed the top she was wearing and removed her bra as well, remaining bare.

He was busy emptying her bag that when he turned and saw her semi naked he almost tripped on the dropped top.

“My girls here feel lonely,” she palmed her breasts in a very sensual way

Rowan ignored her and passed her the pyjama top “It seems like you are doing a good job at keeping them busy.”

She slapped him with her t-shirt and got dressed again “I’d better get covered again, I don’t want to traumatise you.” She was about to add something else but a fit of coughing stopped her. Rowan was at her side in a moment and held her, knowing that it would usually leave her spent. The fits had become less frequent as she improved but the occasional one was enough to leave her breathless and this one seemed to be one of those. She grabbed his arm and squeezed it “hurts,”Aelin complained fisting her hand in his chest while concentrating on breathing. Rowan grabbed the inhaler she had been prescribed to use during an attack. She did as she had been shown by the doctors and then melted in his arms.

“Lie down.”

“Open…” she started but the coughing resumed and her hand fisted in the bed sheets this time. She grabbed the inhaler and breathed its medicines again, feeling air rushing back in her lungs. Eventually she collapsed in bed exhausted “Window…” she finally finished.

Rowan moved with speed and did as told. Aelin loved the spring air and even at the hospital she often asked him for the window to be open. It made her feel as if she could breath.

He moved her to the centre of the bed and covered with the blankets “do you feel like eating something?”

“No,” she said weakly and he knew she was not well. In the short time he had known her, Aelin had never refused a meal “Sleep,” his hand brushed her hair and she was asleep within minutes.

Once he was positive she was asleep he walked out and gently closed the door and went to the kitchen to make a phone call. Lorcan had been pestering him almost every day but Rowan had ignored him.

“The dutiful captain finally decides to phone back, or should I call you nurse Whitethorn now?”

Rowan growled and almost closed the call again, then decided to count till ten and listen what he had to say.

“Say your piece Salvaterre and let me go.”

“I want you to march back through these doors in four days.”

Rowan pinched the bridge of his nose. How could he leave her alone?

“A please from time to time doesn’t hurt.”

“Whitethorn, I don’t give a fuck if your firefighter woman made you a well mannered soldier. I am your superior and if I give you an order I expect you to answer with yes, sir. Another peep from you and you get your arse written up for insubordination and you can kiss your career goodbye.”

Rowan had to punch something, but a loud noise could wake up Aelin and he wanted to avoid that. So he just hung up the phone without giving Lorcan a reply then he grabbed a pillow and screamed into it. Once he was done he grabbed his laptop from his bag and set in motion his next plan.

TAGS:

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BEAUTIFUL art by @thepoisonofgod 

Masterlist  ~  Chapter 29

Words: 1800  Warnings: Unproctected sex, swears, intimacy.

Thanking the goddess that is @astroboots for the beta!

*********

As the sky got darker, the celebrations amped up.

Zach fit like he’d always been part of our family. He supported Ahma when she staggered a little while watching the lion dance - standing for long periods had never been her forte.

Later, when we watched the fireworks before heading back home, I came back from using the nearby restroom to see that he’d procured a folding chair for her. No one had asked him. I instinctively knew he’d just done it, and my Ahma beamed up at him like he’d hung the moon.

When we got back to Mom’s, she made tea while I changed into my new dress. The fabric felt cool and silky against my skin.

When I came out of the bedroom, Mom and Ahma were fussing over Zach, blocking my view of him.

“I can’t accept this,” he was saying, his voice low.

The two matriarchs in my family parted, giving me a view of the man I’d come to care for so much. 

He wore a smart white shirt, open at the neck, and a pair of charcoal suit pants. A jacket in the same fabric lay over my Mom’s arm, and Ahma held a pair of smart, black sneakers - indistinguishable from dress shoes from a distance, but shoes he’d be able to wear every day.

My heart squeezed, hard.

“Aiyah!” Ahma cried. “You cannot tell me how to spend my money. I will be dead soon and what good will it do me then?”

Zach looked up at me, torn. I shrugged helplessly.

“I am too old to walk to the store to return the clothes,” Ahma said, affecting a feeble air. I swallowed back a laugh.

Mom cupped his face in her hands. “Just say thank you, Zach.”

Zach smiled slowly and nodded. “Thank you. Thank you both so much. Happy New Year.”

“Happy New Year,” we all echoed.

Mom handed Zach the jacket and he bent and bussed her cheek.

Satisfied, Ahma and Mom disappeared into their respective bedrooms to change for dinner at our favourite Chinese place. The table had been booked for three hundred and sixty hour days, I reckoned.

Zach spread his hands, awe on his face. “Martha…”

“It’s useless to protest,” I murmured, smoothing my hand down the lapel of his shirt collar. “They got your size just right.”

“You didn’t know?”

“No, I didn’t. I assume that’s why they waited until I went to change to give it to you.” I slid my palm up and cupped his jaw, rubbing my thumb over his lower lip, over the little crease, the little kiss from the angels who made him. “You look very handsome.”

“You look…” Zach settled his hands on my hips, his gaze travelling from the top of my head to my feet and back again. “Wow. There are no words. Am I really the guy who gets to go home with you tonight?”

“Yes. You are.” I leaned in and kissed him softly. He drew me close, and his lips parted under mine. I felt his cock twitch through the dress pants and pulled back, sighing.

“I don’t think I’ll ever get enough of you, Martha Song.”

Mom and Ahma appeared as Zach put his new sneakers on. He looked so good. I was overwhelmed by the urge to unbutton that smart shirt and press my lips to every inch of tanned skin, to breathe in his scent and mark him as mine and never, ever let him go.

“Ready?” Ahma asked. She wore a red and gold embroidered jacket and a smart, pale grey top and trousers. Mom had donned her best cheongsam, a rich, dark green with coiled black brocade forming a floral pattern across her left shoulder. Her hair fell around her face in soft waves, and I was struck by how beautiful she was.

“Ready!” I said, slipping my arm through Zach’s.

He bent his head to mine. “Proud to be on my arm tonight, honey?”

“I’m always proud to be on your arm.”

He shook his head, muttering “Stupid,” like I wasn’t playing with a full deck, but he dropped a kiss on my forehead anyway. I could feel his smile.

Mom unlocked the door, and I tugged Zach towards it, but then remembered something. “Wait!”

I hurried to the kitchen drawer where Mom kept a little box with special knicknacks, and fished out Bryan’s dog tags, slid them around my neck, where they rested under my cheongsam, next to my heart.

Zach was watching me with softness in his gaze.

“I always bring him with us for New Year dinner,” I said quietly.

Mom caught me in a big hug, squeezing me tight. I squeezed her back, and felt the cold metal of Bryan’s dog tags between us, and it was momentarily like there were three of us again; and then we locked up and made our way to Da Mao Jia.

*****

“I had plans, I swear,” Zach groaned as we practically fell through the door of my apartment. “I did. But I can barely breathe right now, let alone engage in anything more… enthusiastic.”

Just the thought of him lying on top of me made me shake my head. “Unfortunately, I agree. We were no match for Da Mao Jia’s new year banquet.”

Zach closed the door behind him and shook his head. “I’ve never seen so much food. I have never eaten so much food.”

I hefted the takeout box in my hands. “I hope you want beef ho fun and har gow for breakfast.”

He made a face. “I need to lie down.”

I settled the box of leftovers in the fridge. Zach was sitting on the couch, eyes closed, hands on his stomach. “I may never need to eat again.”

“That’s a shame, because that takeout box begs to differ.”

He chuckled. “Stop talking about food and get over here.”

I started to sit, then thought better of it. “I need to change.”

I unbuttoned the cheongsam and slid down the side zip. I felt like I had a little food baby and I sighed with relief as it was given more space.

Zach watched me over the back of the couch as I shimmied into an old t-shirt and took my glasses off, setting them on the shelf above the futon. 

“God! That’s better. I’m sorry we didn’t get to have fun with the dress.”

“Plenty of time for that.”

My pulse quickened. He was talking about the future. A future with me. I was careful not to mention it, though.

He patted the couch and I dropped down next to him. He curled his arm around me, and I snuggled in. Outside, the fireworks exploded in the black of the night sky, spears of red and plumes of gold splitting the darkness and shaming the pinprick stars.

Zach’s fingers played lazily in my hair. “Your Mom and Ahma are too generous,” he said eventually.

“No, they aren’t.”

He mulled this over for a few moments. He was so warm and solid beside me, and I never wanted to get up.

“While we were out - you were in that little fried chicken place with your Ahma - I asked about the pot washer job. They said yes.”

I sat up. “Zach, that’s amazing!”

He flushed. “Well. It’s a job.”

“Don’t downplay it. I’m pleased for you.” I pressed a kiss to his lips, felt them curve under mine. “I am. Congratulations.”

His arm tightened around me. “Don’t know how I’ll cope in the kitchen. It’s in their basement, so there’s more space than most places. We’ll see. I have to try.”

His quiet determination made me love him even more. If that was possible. “You’ll do great. I’m sure of it.” I kissed him again, felt interest stir between my legs. I sat up further, then turned and swung my leg over his thighs so I straddled him. “And I’m also sure that I’m ready for dessert.”

Zach’s eyebrow arched. “Oh, yeah?” He smoothed his palms up my bare legs to cup my ass through my thin underwear. His hands were warm, a little rough.

I shivered. “Very much yeah.”

He inhaled sharply when I unbuttoned his suit pants, my knuckles brushing against his cock, now at full mast. My muscles clenched greedily at the feel of him. 

“You know,” I whispered against his neck. “Before you, I had a little scare. Had to get tested at the clinic. I was clean, and there’s been no one since. I take the pill to control irregular periods.”

I felt his cock jump in my hand. He blinked. “I’m trying to work out if you’re saying what I think you’re saying. It’s making all the blood leave my brain.” He cleared his throat as I palmed him eagerly, his breathing getting heavier. “Um. We had regular tests in the marines. There was someone, during, but we always wore condoms. So I’m clean. But you don’t have to….” He sucked in a breath as I twisted my wrist just so. “..take my word for it. I’ll wear a condom for as long as you want me to.”

“I trust you, Zach.” I used my free hand to push my underwear aside and rubbed the head of him where I was soft and wet.

Zach closed his eyes. “Fuck.”

He started to stroke me just where we were almost joined. Watching his thumb circle my clit while I rubbed his cock over my entrance made me wetter, more excited. “Zach.”

“I got you, baby girl,” he murmured, his eyes hazy, gazing at me with something that was maybe half lust, half love. “I got you. Let go for me.”

And I did, gasping into his neck as I rode the high. As my muscles clenched and spasmed, I slid myself down on him, feeling him inside me without barriers, and the heft and fit of him was divine.

“Martha,” Zach rasped, his palms hard on my hips. “Holy shit, Martha, you feel so good-”

I picked up the pace, riding him hard, his little grunts and quick inhales stoking the fire, until his hips stuttered under mine.

“Shit. I can’t - I’m coming, honey-”

I clenched hard around him and with a guttural murmur of my name, he spilled inside me, shuddering, his face buried in my neck.

I love you, Zach, I thought. I love you so much.

**********

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[irisofpurple]

Good Girl

Summary: What happens when Lana comes home to Ethan, fashionably late after a girls night?

Book: Open Heart Book 3 (post ending)

Pairing: Ethan Ramsey×f!MC (Lana Stevens)

Word Count: 2k.

Warnings/Rating: Smut, Swearing, NSFW; Explicit.

A/N: This is pure filth and nothing but filth. A self indulgent produce of my very Scorpio brain and the smuttiest fic I've ever written. I'm not exactly sorry but you've been warned jskssjjkkhhssk. It follows up after New Look, which was my first ever Pictagram edit. I suppose you can still read this if you missed that though. Hope you enjoy reading!

This work is NSFW and meant for 18+ readers only. Please use discretion.

Disclaimer: All characters belong to Pixelberry.

A rush of giddy excitement hit her as she turned the keys to his apartment, making her stumble slightly at the doorstep as she entered.

Alcohol from the countless shots Jackie made them do was still hot and pumping through her veins. In her drunken haze, Sienna had actually convinced her to keep the wig on.

She adjusted it slightly before she realised she'd stepped into pin drop silence, the moonlight streaming in through the floor to ceiling windows the only source of light cutting through the darkness.

A quick glance at her watch told her it was 2:30 AM. Way past Ethan's bedtime.

Her stomach dropped. The girls night had went on longer than she'd anticipated. They'd gotten a bit carried away between gossiping and drinking to new beginnings. It had been a while since they'd had a relaxing night as this after all.

As fun as that was, what Lana was really looking forward to tonight was seeing Ethan. All that teasing had made her as hot as she'd hoped to have made him. She wanted to leave right then but it wouldn't have been fair to her friends.

Her shoulders slumped. It was no use now.

She turned head into the bedroom, the knowledge that she'd find him peacefully asleep making her heart sink a little.

"You're late."

The familiar rumble of his voice echoed through the room, making her gasp in surprise and turn back around.

There he was. Sitting at the bar with a glass of scotch nestled in his hand.

Her heart jumped in her throat, a fresh surge of adrenaline coursing through her, renewing her excitement even more than before.

The contrasting shadows and moonlight highlighted his already sharp jawline, making him look more beautiful than ever.

Slowly, he rose from his seat, drawing nearer to her, his dark predatory gaze never leaving her. She wasn't able to look away either, her belly clenching with anticipation with every step he took.

She shivered as he ran his fingers though the red hair, his blue eyes going the deepest shade of sapphire possible.

"You're still wearing it, I see." he muttered darkly, a dangerous edge to his voice.

A slow smirk spread across her face. She knew no joy like seeing Ethan Ramsey tethering on the edge in a struggle for control.

And she'd make sure he fell over tonight.

"I thought you'd fallen asleep." she said, feigning nonchalance, pointedly ignoring his observation.

In a sudden movement, he pulled her hand by the wrist to the front of his pants, making her feel his hardness though the fabric.

"Do you know how hard it is to sleep like this?" He said through gritted teeth.

Lana was unfazed. Her tongue darted out to moisten her lips as she stared right back into those celestial blues.

"I can only imagine." She murmured huskily as her fingers caressed him ever so slightly, confidence oozing through her as he twitched violently at her touch.

He pulled her hand away and onto his chest, having realized that his move had backfired.

"You made me wait." He accused, his rebellious gaze dropping to her lips.

"I think I know exactly how to make up for it." Lana said with coquettish smirk.

She captured his lips soon after, not letting him a chance to say anything more. Her hands travelled down to palm his bulge once more, making him groan against her lips. Tongues tangled in a desperate battle for dominance, their need for each other assuming more importance than air for a few breathless moments.

Lana pushed him onto the couch, looking down at him with a devilish smile as she pulled off her wig, shaking free her natural blonde curls. They fell around her shoulders gracefully as Ethan watched her with an awestruck look on his face, all traces of resistance gone. She took off her top next, taking delight in his sharp intake of breath as her breasts spilled free before his reverent eyes, following to straddle his lap and continue kissing him with abandon.

Her lips trailed down the corded muscles of his neck, sucking and biting as she goes. Ethan's hands meanwhile were firmly gripping her waist, another one inching underneath her skirt, closer and closer to her soaked core.

But she wouldn't let him get there. Not yet.

His shirt flew across the living room in a matter of seconds and then she on her knees before him, her lips having left a wet trail of kisses all over his chest and abs.

She unbuckled his belt with deft fingers, pulling down the redundant material of his trousers. His cock sprung free, jutting out in all it's glory, demanding immediate attention.

Her delicate fingers gripped him firmly, pumping him a few times torturously.

"Lana.." Ethan groaned helplessly.

She gave him a smile that she knew he found devastating.

"Feel free to pull my hair." she said as she moved to give a long luscious lick along his length.

Her blood red lips were wrapped around his cock the next second, causing Ethan's hips to buck up involuntarily. His fingers tangled in her hair, making her hum around him in satisfaction.

She was on her knees but the one surrendering was Ethan, completely at her mercy. That knowledge was as beholding as it was empowering.

She sank down the length of him, hollowing out her cheeks, relishing every grunt and moan that escaped his throat as she took him deeper into her own.

She repeated the motion, working him up, not letting the involuntary gags or tears brimming in her eyes stop her from taking him where she wanted.

Keeping eye contact, she realised him with a dizzying pop only to suck on his heavy balls till they were as wet as his now glistening cock.

The look of sheer adoration mixed with lust and frustration on his face had to the hottest thing she'd ever witnessed. It made her own folds drip with arousal.

Her tongue flicked across the slit of his tip, before her warm mouth engulfed him once more to bob down his steely length with determination, taking him all the way in.

"Sweetheart, you're going to make me.. FUCKK!"

His grip on her hair tightened, almost to the point of pain. It only served to excite her more. She didn't let up till he emptied himself down her throat, cursing as he shook and came like never before.

She licked him clean, not leaving a single drop.

She felt breathless and a little punch drunk as he pulled her up and into his arms, kissing her tenderly, softly caressing her cheek and wiping away the tears.

He pulled back to look at her, concern etching his handsome face. "Are you okay?"

She laughed. "Of course. Why wouldn't I be?"

He seemed satisfied with her answer because the look of worry gave way to a roguish smirk.

"Just needed to be sure cause I'm not done with you yet."

"Wha-"

"Shhh." He silenced her with his fingers. "You had your way with me, didn't you? Now it's my turn."

"But.." her query died in a moan as Ethan's fingers found her dripping core.

"Damn." He hissed. "How are you already so wet?"

Lana was in no shape to answer because his thumb was working her clit in maddening circles, excruciating pleasure rippling through her as two fingers curled into her slick passage.

Her eyes rolled to the back of her head as his skillful fingers moved over her with precision and expertise, over and over again. Just when she was about to reach her peak however, he ceased all movements.

Lana cried out in disappointment from the sudden loss of sensations.

"What are you doing?" she hissed at him in frustration.

Ethan only smiled. "You didn't think I'd let you get away with all that teasing so fast, did you?"

"What do you-"

"Hush, my darling. I said it was my turn. You made me wait for you all evening. Now close your eyes."

"But-"

"No arguments." He said firmly.

Lana hesitantly shut her eyes, the ache between her legs getting unbearable with each passing second.

"Good girl." She could hear the smile in his voice. "Don't move an inch and keep your eyes shut. I'll be right back."

"Where are you going?" she cried. "You can't leave me like this."

"Don't you trust me, my love?" He chastened.

Lana gulped. "I do but.."

"No buts then. I promise I'll make it worth your while but no cheating or this ends here."

"No!" Lana shook her head. "I'll do as you say."

"That's my girl."

She heard his footsteps fade away as she struggled to stay still. She was tempted to take a peek and more anything else, touch herself and soothe the throb between her legs. She could get off so easily right now.

But she didn't dare disobey. The wait and build up made her wetter and more turned on than she'd ever been.

Her breath came in shallow pants as she waited and by the time he was back, she felt like one touch would be enough to make her explode.

He secured a silky fabric across her eyes and she heard a low click of glass on the surface of the table.

What the hell was that?

Her heart pounded in her chest and her sex clenched in anticipation.

"Hands above your head and don't move. Or I'll have to tie you up."

She nodded eagerly, following his instructions. "Please Ethan."

He chuckled. "Patience, my love. If there's anything I learnt tonight, it's that waiting makes everything better."

She gasped as she felt his lips on her inner thighs, his beard deliciously scraping her skin as he kissed her everywhere but where she needed him most. It was too much but not enough.

His fingers hooked around the lace of her panties. "As pretty as these are, they have to go."

A loud rip followed, tearing through the room and informing her that her panties were definitely in shreds.

"That was.." she choked out, almost in alarm, unable to finish her sentence. But Ethan seemed to understand her concern.

"I'll buy you more." He grunted.

She felt warm liquid slosh onto her chest, flowing down slowly between the valley of her breasts and down her belly, making her entire body tingle.

Her back arched as the flow inched closer to her pulsing core. She moaned out loud as it finally reached it's destination, suddenly cooling her hot sex.

Ethan's mouth closed on her clit before she could process what was going on.

"Ethannn" She cried out.

She didn't recognize the feline noises escaping her, gasping and moaning for her life as she climbed higher and higher with each masterful stroke of his tongue.

"God. I thought scotch was best had neat. I was wrong. So wrong." He muttered against her sex.

The low rumble vibrated through her body and as soon as his fingers joined the ministrations of his mouth, Lana catapulted over the edge, fireworks exploding behind her eyes and blinding her with hot white pleasure as she came all over his face harder than ever. He didn't stop till all the aftershocks rocking her subsided, letting her ride out her orgasm.

He removed her blindfold and pulled her into his arms, gently kissing the top of her head as she hugged him feebly.

As she caught her breath, her eyes landed on the expensive half empty bottle of scotch and she laughed. "Scotch and sex? Who would've thought?"

Ethan chuckled, running his fingers through her hair. "Me apparently. How did it feel?"

She buried her face in his chest, feeling her face heat. "You know how I felt. I was pretty vocal about it."

Low masculine laughter rumbled through his chest making her heart squeeze and sex clench, like she didn't just have the best orgasm of her life.

She wasn't embarrassed though because she could feel his rock hard errection against her thigh.

She looked up at him mischievously. "Are we ready for a round two?"

She yelped as he lifted her, her thighs wrapping around his waist as he carried her to their bedroom.

"Always."

Whew! I hope you enjoyed reading that. As usual, I'd love to know what you think. Please forgive the mistakes if there are any. I couldn't proofread due to shortage of time.

Tags: @lem-20 @pixie88 @aleynareads @maurine07 @whimsicallywayward15 @lovingramsey @coffeeheartaddict @txemrn @shewillreadyou @aussieez @queencarb @quixoticdreamer16 @schnitzelbutterfingers @imaneditorthankyouverymuch @mercury84choices @thegreentwin @adiehardfan @custaroonie @headoverheelsforramsey @openheartfanfics @choicesficwriterscreations

[maneskinrollercoaster]

~ We’re Everything To Each Other That We Ever Needed 3: Being Without You Is Like Being Without Myself ~

Pairing: Ethan Torchio x Chiara Russo (fictional character)

Word count: 4629

Warnings: smut, swearing

Summary: Ethan makes an unexpected decision.

Ethan stormed out of the bathroom and went downstairs to see Damiano sitting on the couch in the living room. When he saw Ethan he immediately stood up.

- Ethan.. fratello.. I’m so sorry.. - Damiano said trying to reach Ethan’s shoulder.

- How dare you call me a brother? Huh? After what you did? - Ethan was furious and nothing would be able to stop him.

- I know I fucked up, but hey, you know I didn’t mean that, I’m sorry - Damiano said clearly feeling guilty.

- You’re not sorry, at least have some balls to fucking admit it. - Ethan stood up in front of him. - You always take everything you want huh? You don’t even care of what other people feel, you just go and grab anything you’d like without any consequences. And you had to do it with Chiara too right? You had to take the only fucking person I truly loved! - Ethan grabbed Damiano’s shirt and it was only a matter of time till he hits his face.

- Ethan I swear I didn’t want that to happen, I was drunk.. - Damiano said trying to stop him.

They were both looking into each other’s eyes, Ethan’s dark from anger, Damiano’s guilty.

- You’re pathetic, I’m not even gonna waste my time on you, you fucking piece of shit! - Ethan let go of Damiano, gave him the last death stare and walked out of the house.

*in the meantime*

Chiara was overwhelmed. She was sitting at the counter for 15 minutes now after Ethan left her alone and stormed out of the bathroom. She was numb. Her cheeks were red and wet from the tears, her eyes puffy. She’s never seen Ethan that angry. He was always calm, quiet and when something bad was happening he always preferred to talk than argue. But Chiara couldn’t blame him. She was the one who betrayed him and broke his heart.

Chiara slowly stepped off the counter, not really knowing what to do with herself. She went out of the bathroom and picked up the T-shirt from the floor. She took off the heels and the dress and she put on a shirt, sitting on the bed. Chiara knew that she has no right to be in Ethan’s room but she didn’t have enough courage to go downstairs after what she did with Damiano.

How could you do this Chiara? How the fuck could you cheat on Ethan, he was so good to you, always so caring and loving, so polite, what the fuck were you thinking!? - she said to herself and closed her watery eyes.

Moments passed and she heard a quiet knock on the door. She said muffled “come in” and a second later she saw Victoria entering the room. Her face was serious like never before. Chiara figured that she knows about everything.

- Damiano told me what happened. - she said coming up to Chiara and sitting next to her on the bed. - Girl, you fucked up.. - she sighed.

- I know.. - Chiara’s voice broke. - I really didn’t mean for that to happen.. - she started crying.

Victoria wrapped her arms around her shoulders and pulled her into a warm hug. Chiara didn’t expect that, she thought Victoria will yell at her.

- I know you didn’t want that, Chi. Damiano is so embarrassed, he talked to Ethan and they fought. Ethan stormed out of the house and Damiano locked himself in his room. - Victoria said stroking Chiara’s back gently, trying to calm her down.

- What the fuck was I thinking, Ethan will never want to speak to me again. - she said covering her face and breaking down even more.

- If you really didn’t mean that, Ethan will understand. I’m not saying he will come back to you but give him some time. He loves you and he’s crazy about you. It’s gonna be all good. - Victoria said resting her head on Chiara’s, still stroking her back.

***

It was evening already and Chiara spent the whole day in Victoria’s room. They talked about what happened and Victoria promised her that she will help her fix everything. Thomas also sat with them for some minutes and told Chiara that even though she fucked up big time, he knows Ethan and he’s sure that they will fix it between each other. Chiara also talked to Damiano which at the beginning was really awkward but then they apologized to each other, hugged and decided to leave it in the past. She also promised him to help him with Giorgia. All that didn’t mean anything though as long as she didn’t fix everything with Ethan, which still didn’t come back home.

Ethan was walking around Rome all day, thinking of what to do. He felt lonely, betrayed and not appreciated at all. He felt like he will never be enough for anyone. He was crying half of the time but had to hide it when some fans were coming up to him to take a picture. He’s never been so broken but after all day wandering around he decided to go back home and have a serious conversation with everyone.

- Can you all come downstairs, per favore? - Ethan said, stepping inside the living room.

Chiara heard his voice and her heart started beating faster, her stomach started hurting really badly. She was stressed and when she looked at Vic, her eyes were full of fear. Victoria took Chiara’s shaking hand and pulled her towards the door. They went downstairs where Ethan was sitting on the couch. When he saw Chiara he was shocked that she was still home. His heartbeat increased and hands started sweating. It’s gonna be a lot harder than I thought - he thought still not letting his eyes off of Chiara.

Girls sat down on the couch opposite Ethan and a minute later Thomas and Damiano joined them and sat next to them. Ethan’s face was serious, without any emotion but inside he felt like he’s gonna explode any minute.

- I have something important to tell all of you. - he said looking at his hands.

They were all looking at him, waiting for the answer when he looked at them one by one.

- I’m leaving the band. And Italy. - he said breathing out all the air he was holding in his lungs for what felt like forever.

- WHAT?! - Victoria raised her voice.

Surprise was un understatement. They were all shocked of what Ethan just told them. Leaving the band? How? Thomas, Vic, Ethan and Damiano were inseparable, when they were arguing it was always temporary because they could never stay mad at each other. But Ethan’s face was serious and they knew he wasn’t joking.

- What do you mean you’re leaving the band? We’re in the middle of the European tour, we have so many festivals arranged for the next months, you can’t just leave Ethan! - Damiano said, deep down knowing he had no right to tell Ethan what to do.

- You see that’s the point! You never care about what I feel, you only think of yourself and what people will say. And I’m always the one left out alone, dealing with everything by myself. You guys don’t give a single fuck about me! You never ask me how I’m doing or if everything is okey! And I’m done, I need a break, from all of you! - Ethan said with his voice raised.

He looked at Chiara.

- Ethan please, don’t leave. It’s all my fault, I know, I’m sorry, but don’t leave them just because of what I did.. - she said pleading.

- It’s not only about what you did, it’s about all of you and they way you treated me like air for the past months. I deserve better.

They didn’t know what to say. Ethan never would have thought himself of leaving the band and when he said those words it sounded so unrealistic. He knew the break will bring Måneskin a lot of problems but he didn’t care, he was proud that for once in his life he stood up for himself and didn’t stay quiet like usual.

- Where are you gonna go? - Thomas said quietly with tears in his eyes.

- I’m gonna fly to Portugal, to my family. - Ethan said and he knew there’s no going back.

- For how long? - asked Victoria with a breaking voice.

- I don’t know yet. For some time.

- But you will come back right? To Italy, to us. - Damiano asked.

- I’m not certain. I just know I need a break, to rest and think about everything. - Ethan said.

- When are you leaving? - Chiara asked with her face all red and wet from tears.

- Tomorrow, I can’t stay here any longer. - Ethan said letting his head down.

They were all sitting in the living room for at least an hour. In silence. None of them had courage to say anything and they were all too overwhelmed with Ethan’s decision. They knew that him leaving will break them more than anything.

*four months later*

It’s been four months since Ethan left Italy and Måneskin house never felt so empty. After the first day without him, Thomas, Victoria and Damiano understood that he was the essence of their band. They knew that Ethan was right, they fucked him up and never paid attention to him and his emotions. The three of them were always the loudest and Ethan was always the one taking care of every situation and now when he wasn’t there they felt like everything fell apart.

Chiara was completely shattered. She locked herself in her apartment and didn’t leave for two weeks after Ethan left. After their conversation in the living room Chiara went with him to his room and apologized so many times, cried and begged him to stay. Ethan told her that he understands but he won’t change his mind. A break was what he needed, and he hoped that they will all finally see how much they’ve broken him for the past few months and how much they didn’t appreciate everything he’s done for them.

It was a sunny morning and Ethan was laying on the grass in the garden. His aunt lived in Lisbon right by the Tag river. The weather was amazing and Ethan found himself spending a lot of time at the beach, swimming or just laying on the sand and reading books. He’s never felt so relaxed. Yesterday he face timed with Chiara for the first time since he left. It felt weird to see her and speak to her after such a long time but Ethan missed her more than he thought. They way she always joked around and made him happy. He could see sadness on her face even though she tried not to show it.

- I miss you.. - she said looking at him through the screen and gaining courage to tell him how she really felt.

Ethan didn’t know if he should say it back or change the topic. He wasn’t sure about anything these days. He loved Chiara, of course it didn’t change. He knew that he is able to give her another chance and try to fix their relationship but until he’s back in Italy he didn’t want to bother himself with that. Not until he saw her face on the screen. She was still beautiful, as always and even though Ethan was still hurt, the corners of his lips uncontrollably went up making him smile at the sight of her gorgeous face. Deep down in his heart he knew that he already forgave her.

*a week later*

Ethan was standing in front of Måneskin house. He was nervous. Two days ago he decided to come back to Rome and fix things between him and Vic, Thomas and Damiano. His heartbeat increased when he knocked at the door. He had the keys but after such a long time he figured it would look stupid to just come in and act like nothing ever happened. After a few minutes he saw the door open and Victoria standing in front of him.

- Ethan! - she shouted happily jumping at him and hugging him tight. - I’m so glad you’re back - she whispered into his ear, not letting go of him.

- I’m glad to be back too, Vic. - he said hugging her back.

They pulled away when Ethan saw Thomas running towards him and jumping on his arms. Thomas’ eyes were watery and they both laughed when he kissed Ethan’s cheek.

- I missed you so much, Edgar! - Thomas said jumping off of Ethan’s arms.

- I missed you too, Toni. - Ethan said poking Thomas’ shoulder and smiling to him.

Damiano came downstairs and looked at Ethan surprised. He came up to them and stood in front of him. Ethan looked at him for a couple of seconds with an emotionless face and Damiano thought he’s still mad at him, but then Ethan pulled him into a warm hug. Damiano sighed with a relief and hugged Ethan back.

- I’m sorry, Ethan. I’m happy you’re back, the house was a mess without you. - Damiano said still hugging Ethan.

- Let’s leave it in the past. - Ethan smiled lightly just like he always did, pulling away from Damiano.

They were all back together. Four rockstars who loved each other more than anything.

- We’re so sorry for every single time we hurt you, it will never happen again. - Victoria said putting her hand on Ethan’s back.

- I know you guys didn’t mean that. But I would much appreciate you to pay more attention to me. - he laughed and along with him Vic, Thomas and Damiano.

***

- Are you gonna meet with her? - Asked Victoria while her and Ethan were sitting at the balcony in her room.

- I don’t know, Vic. I miss her and I really want to see her, I want everything to be back to normal. But she disappointed me and I don’t know if I’m ready yet. - Ethan said. - By the way, how is she? - he asked, looking at Vic.

Chiara wasn’t fine. Even though four months passed and everyone told her that time will help her heal, she found herself thinking of Ethan all the time. She still couldn’t accept the fact that she let him down and she missed him a lot. He was her everything and if she could she would turn back time and change what happened.

- She’s okey, I guess.. She came here yesterday, we invited her for a movie night. She looked fine, but tired. - Vic said.

- Hmm.. She didn’t come here often when I was gone, did she?

- She came here a month after u left. Mainly because she promised Damiano that she will help him get back with Giorgia. After that she came like twice and yesterday. - Vic explained. - She really loves you, Ethan. I know I can’t ask u to talk to her but she really regrets what happened, you’re her everything. - She said, looking back at him.

Ethan knew that he has to meet with Chiara and talk about everything. He wanted to have her back, next to him. He forgave her a long time ago, he loved her too much to be mad at her. But he didn’t know if he’s ready to trust her fully again.

*afternoon, the next day*

“I’m back in Rome, would you want to meet?”. Chiara was looking at the screen of her phone for good 10 minutes, shocked by a message she received from Ethan. She didn’t expect him to text her at all, she thought he won’t speak to her again. Her cheeks turned red and she got nervous. Should I meet him? What am I supposed to do? - she thought still looking at the phone screen. “Yes, I’d love to. When?”. She tapped a message on her phone with shaky hands and let out all the air she’s been holding. “I can come over to you place today. We have to talk about everything”.

Today. She was supposed to meet him today and talk to him after four months without him. She suddenly felt all her breakfast going up her throat. Her face turned red and her stomach started hurting. She felt noxious. She ran to the bathroom and threw up. Her eyes were watery and puffed. After a while spend in front of the toilet puking, Chiara took her phone and texted Ethan. “Sure, see you at 5?” the message said and Chiara couldn’t believe that she will get to see him after such a long time.

***

It was almost 5 and Chiara found herself running around her apartment cleaning everything and preparing for Ethan. She was about to put the water for a coffee when she heard the door bell ringing. Her hands started sweating and she almost pissed her pants. She slowly opened the door and saw him standing there.

He looked stunning. His hair longer than before, he was dressed in a white buttoned up shirt, tight black jeans and black Dr. Martens. He was so handsome. Chiara gasped at the sight of him.

- Ciao, Chi. - he said with a slight smile on his face.

His voice was calm and deep just as always.

- Ciao, Ethan. - she said, still looking into his eyes.

They were standing in front of each other both not knowing what to do.

- Please, come in. - she said but instead he came up to her and wrapped his arms around her pulling her in to a warm, welcoming hug.

Chiara felt all the time stopped. It was only them standing in a tight hug with each other, enjoying each other’s embrace. Ethan missed her scent and the way she always stood on her tip toes to reach him. She was everything he ever needed and when he finally held her in his arms, he felt like everything was back to normal.

- I missed you so much. - Chiara sobbed into his ear and he squeezed her even tighter.

She couldn’t control herself anymore and she bursted in tears holding on to his neck. Ethan knew that Chiara regretted what happened the minute he saw her sad eyes and he couldn’t control himself either, tears falling down his cheeks.

- Shh.. I’m here, Chi. - he said politely, stroking her back to calm her down.

She pulled away and looked into his eyes.

- I.. - she wanted to say something but Ethan stopped her.

- Let’s come in and sit down. - he gestured at the inside of Chiara’s apartment.

- Yes, yes. - she said and they both entered her flat.

Chiara made a coffee for her and Ethan and they both sat down next to each other on the couch in the living room. They stayed silent for a few minutes just staring at each other and smiling slightly.

- How was Portugal? - Chiara broke the silence, taking a sip of her coffee.

- It was good, weather was really nice. I spent most of the time at the beach reading. - he said also sipping his coffee.

Chiara noticed that Ethan looked a bit different. His arms were more muscular , his chest wider and his thighs bigger. He was so insanely attractive.

- Did you start working out? - she asked surprised.

- Yeah, I had to focus on something and my aunt has a little gym in her garage so I just lifted some weights. - he said chuckling. - So you see the difference? I didn’t know it’s that visible.

- Four months is a long time, of course I see the difference. - she said, letting down her head and looking at her cup.

She wanted to jump at him and kiss him and tell him how much he means to her and that she’s so happy that he’s back.

- Listen I’m really-

- Sorry.. I know. - Ethan interrupted her, putting their cups on the coffee table and grabbing Chiara’s hands. - I know you’re sorry and I know you didn’t want any of that to happen. I understand you were drunk. But you hurt me a lot, cazzo.. You broke my heart Chiara. When I saw you with him.. You don’t even know what I felt. I felt like a part of me died. - he said squeezing her hands.

- I know. - she said quietly loosing all the courage to look at him. - I know I hurt you and disappointed you, but I love you, Ethan. I love you more than anyone could ever think and I can’t imagine my life without you. I know I have no right to ask you to forgive me, but believe me, when you left, my whole world shattered. Because being without you is like being without myself. And what am I without myself? Nothing. - she said with tears in her eyes, finally looking at his face.

Ethan couldn’t stop himself. He cupped Chiara’s cheek with his palm and pulled her closer. He stroked her shoulder with his other hand and seconds later she could feel his lips on hers. The kiss was slow, gentle and full of love. They kissed carefully, afraid that one of them will hurt the other. Chiara wrapped her hands around Ethan’s neck and suddenly he pulled her up on his lap. She pulled away and looked at him carefully.

- I forgave you a long time ago. - he said pecking her lips again. - I love you, Chi. And there’s nothing that can change that. - Ethan kissed her again, more passionately this time.

- But.. wait, what does this mean? - she asked, pulling away again.

- I give you another chance. You hurt me but I realized that you didn’t mean it and I’m willing to try again with you. - he said stroking her cheek and looking into her eyes.

Chiara couldn’t have been happier than in this minute. She threw herself on Ethan and hugged him tightly. He leaned his face against her neck and wrapped his arm around her.

- Thank you - she said, kissing his cheek.

- You’re my everything Chi. I can’t live without you. - Ethan said.

He kissed her again and moments later they found themselves in Chiara’s bedroom, making out on her bed. He pulled off her oversized hoodie and she started unbuttoning his shirt. All the fear, sadness and shame disappeared when Ethan kneeled in front of her on the bed, pulling off her shorts along with her panties. Chiara grabbed his belt and after she took it off, Ethan pulled off his jeans and hung over her beautiful naked body. She pulled him closer, grabbing the back of his neck and while running her fingers through his hair, she kissed him with so much desire. She was needy and so was he. They both missed each other’s touch and a feeling of their bodies grinding against each other.

- I love you so much - Chiara said when Ethan kissed her breasts and started trailing his kisses down her stomach.

- You’re all fucking mine. - he said when he reached her thighs.

Ethan spread them apart and the second he laid his lips on her, Chiara let out a loud moan. He started licking her up and she was tugging on his hair. She grabbed the sheets when she felt him licking her entrance and she couldn’t stop moaning his name.

- Ethan.. It feels so good.. - she sighed when he squeezed her hips and looked her in the eyes, still licking her.

At this sight she lost it and a warm feeling spread inside her stomach while she reached her climax. She let out the last moan and a second later Ethan was above her kissing her dry lips.

Chiara wrapped her legs around Ethan’s hips and, looking into her eyes he put his erection inside her, filling her to the last inch. Chiara screamed from pleasure, a familiar feeling of him inside her. He started thrusting slowly. He remembered the way he fucked her in the bathroom and this time he didn’t want to hurt her. Chiara felt different this time. She knew that this sex was like no other. Full of love, reassurance and passion. It was different than any other sex she had with Ethan and she couldn’t get her eyes off of him. His torso was well built, visible muscles on his chest. His arms were stronger and his back was a lot wider than it used to be. His cheek bones were more sharp and Chiara couldn’t stop staring at him while he was pulling inside and out of her.

- Like the view? - he moaned kissing her cheek and his pace went a bit faster.

- Yes.. - she sighed and tugged his hair.

Even though the sex was slower than usual, Ethan and Chiara felt their high coming. He started moving a bit harder and faster but not too fast to enjoy the moment just a bit longer. Chiara felt her walls tightening around Ethan’s erection and she knew she’s gonna cum any second. Ethan grabbed her face and kissed her harshly while hitting every little spot inside her. They were both on the edge when suddenly Ethan’s warm sperm spread inside Chiara and her walls clenched around him. Both screamed each other’s name reaching the climax together.

Ethan fell on Chiara’s body, they were all sweaty and breathing heavily. After a second he pulled out of her and laid next to her, pulling her closer to him, so she could lay on his chest. Chiara leaned her face against Ethan’s neck and put her hand on his chest, stroking I gently.

- I love you, Chi, more than this world has ever seen. - Ethan said and kissed her forehead.

Since then Chiara and Ethan decided to start a proper relationship. They loved each other more than ever and Ethan knew that it was a good decision to give her another chance because Chiara didn’t leave him once, even for a second. She was constantly trying to show him how much he means to her and she was completely crazy about him.

*a few years later*

- I do - Chiara said, smiling.

She was standing in front of Ethan, in a beautiful white long dress, holding his hands. Victoria’s sobbing could be heard in the back.

- Do you Ethan Torchio take Chiara Russo to be your wife, to have and hold from this day forward, for better and for worse, for richer and for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, until you are parted by death?

Ethan squeezed Chiara’s hands and smiled to her widely.

- I do. - he said and Thomas bursted in tears.

- I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss your bride.

Ethan grabbed Chiara’s face with his both hands and planted a gentle kiss on her lips. She wrapped her hands around his neck, kissing him back and smiling. Everyone started cheering, crying and clapping their hands.

Chiara was nothing without Ethan. Ethan was something with Chiara. Together they were everything to each other that they ever needed.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Wow, that was long but I was so excited to finish it that I lost the count of words haha!

I hope you enjoyed these 3 parts.

Thank you so much for reading! 😘

Requests are opened if you’d like me to write anything specific ❤️

Tag list [ @teenyweenynightghost , @superchrystaldrug ]

[starcrossedkaiju]

Kingslayer AU: Chapter Six

Finally. Onto the newer chapters. These’ll have a lot more character development and bonding. I wrote this about two days ago. So it’s hot off the presses.

I’m actually kinda proud of this one. Also I’m trying to make these shorter because I don’t wanna be writing a single chapter for three days straight anymore; it was burning me the hell out.

Tango readjusted his scarf, throwing the end of it behind him. It hit Scott in the face on the way down.

“Watch it,” Scott smacked the man in front of him on the shoulder.

“You’re annoying,” Tango replied from in front of him.

“Guys,” Impulse scolded.

They were approaching the end of the tree line, which would lead them right to the gates of Dogwarts. Scott had been looking at his feet for most of the journey, which is why he ran into Tango when he stopped suddenly.

Tango turned around and pushed him away, “Watch it,” he said with sarcasm.

The group chose to stop just inside the trees. Impulse drew a cloth from his pocket and wrapped it over Scott’s eyes. If he was the one making the plan he wouldn’t have himself as a kidnapping victim, it was a bit on the nose. Tango said it was just for looks.

Scott’s weapons were taken and stashed in Impulse’s Ender Chest, as well as his pager.

Scott sighed, “I still don’t understand why we can’t just get in there and…” he made a stabbing gesture to the air.

Impulse made a sarcastic attempt at looking shocked, “okay, first off, there’s six of them and three of us,” he pointed out.

“Second, that would be impulsive and stupid. They would all come back and hunt us for sport,” he said.

“Says you,” Scott said in the wrong direction, because he was blindfolded. Impulse rolled his eyes at the jape.

“Okay, you ready?” Tango put a hand on Scott’s shoulder. Eager to get a move on.

“As ever,” Scott replied. Then he was lifted off his feet by his accomplices, both of which were taller than him. A hand under each arm.

The trio left the trees and trudged up the mountain towards Dogwarts. Scott went over his life choices in his head while Tango and Impulse quietly argued over not dropping him.

Apparently someone was waiting for them, because Tango began exchanging words with a person standing in front of the gates. It was Etho, no doubt. They discussed the elephant in the room, Scott stuck to the plan and said nothing. Even when Etho asked him how it felt.

He did flip him the bird though.

When Scott was re-introduced to the ground he was on a set of wooden steps. Tango had gone inside, presumably to alert the boss of the situation. Impulse kept a firm grip on Scott’s forearm.

“You know what to do right?” Impulse asked.

Scott nodded. Hoping his acting skills weren’t too rough around the edges.

The door clicked open and a pair of hands dragged him into the main base, pushed him down in a chair, and pulled his blindfold off.

Across from Scott, standing over the opened book on the enchantment table was the Red King. A shiny new pair of sunglasses rested on his face, on top of a purple-tinted nose, and his arm was in a sling. The sight almost brought a smile to Scott’s face.

Ren clapped the book shut and stood to assess his guest.

“Well, what a pleasant surprise,” he greeted without a smile.

Tango put a hand on Scott’s back, “I think you’d be pleased to know he came to us,” he said.

An eyebrow raised from under Ren’s sunglasses. He reached out and pulled a chair from a table near the wall, positioning it in front of Scott.

Ren sighed and sat down, crossing his legs, “is that so?” he asked. Scott started getting uncomfortable.

Impulse made to speak up but was silenced by a hand.

“Let the man speak for himself,” Ren ordered, “come on now dude. Don’t tell me you’ve lost your voice,” he teased.

Scott cleared his throat, “I came to them. Yes,” he confirmed.

“Why,” Ren asked sternly.

Scott did his best not to squirm.

“I changed my mind,” he said, “I want except your offer. To join the Red Army,” Scott explained.

Ren laughed out loud. He threw his head back and leaned backwards. Scott bit the inside of his lip and looked away. Tango shifted on his feet.

“Really?” Ren asked, he was almost crying.

“Ren…” Impulse attempted to calm the king down but was silenced.

“No, no, by all means I want to hear what Major has to say,” Ren said with encouragement.

Scott grimaced, “Although I do not agree that kidnapping me was the best way to go about gaining my interest,” he started.

“Well it certainly gained some interest,” Ren said under his breath.

“I was already considering leaving my agreement with the Red Desert; and do not get me wrong I don’t appreciate anything you and your men have put me or my husband through,” Scott raised his voice. Assertiveness taking over, he stood up.

“I can see an opportunity when it holds an axe above my head,” Scott crossed his arms.

“I am willing to come to an agreement with you. I will join your army, I will act as a double agent, I will act under your orders, on one condition,” he held up a finger.

Ren slowly stood to meet his gaze, although he was a lot taller.

“Jimmy will not be involved,” Scott said explicitly.

The Red King turned away and went back to the enchantment table, he gazed into the book absently. Then tossed it back on the table.

“You’re on thin Ice Major,” Ren concluded and quickly left.

Scott expected a handshake at least.

“I’d say that went pretty well,” Tango said after the door slammed.

“He agreed?” Scott asked.

“Well he didn’t reject. So I’d say you’re hired,” Impulse provided.

“He thinks you’re a valuable asset. I don’t think he could afford to refuse your offer,” Tango leaned down and reassured.

Scott slouched down in the chair and rubbed his eyes. This was a bad idea.

His first orders came two days later. He was put in charge of the “chores”. Which essentially meant he was doing everything nobody else wanted to do.

Tango assured him that the Red Army was just sizing him up to see if he was actually serious. It was precaution, considering Scott had sort of blindsided them by joining forces. Nobody would look him in the eyes unless they were ordering him around. He knew he wasn’t meant to feel welcome there.

“They’ll come around, although I’m not sure why it bothers you,” he said.

“It’s just awkward,” Scott excused, “they act like I’m gonna pull a knife on them whenever there’s only two of us on the room,” he said.

“Well, after you showed them the door two weeks ago they’ve been a bit jumpy,” Tango replied.

Being the supply runner meant the sacrifice of his sleep schedule, except for his three “off days”. In order to operate effectively he had to do most of his chores at night when his husband was sleeping; and thank god he did that most of the time.

Most of the time.

The other times Scott packed a bag full of iron or wood and said he was running errands under the guise of not being able to sleep. It didn’t feel good to lie, but as far as Jimmy was concerned Scott only left the house on the nights they were both awake.

At the next meeting Scott complained to Tango over a bottle of mystery alcohol, “I may as well be an indentured servant,” he poured himself another glass.

“You know, Scott, you’re actually doing something pretty important,” Tango said from where he was lounging on a pile of pillows.

“Indentured servant,” Scott repeated.

“You’re the one in charge of all their resources. I mean they even have you doing farm work right? So you know like, everything about them,” Tango pointed out.

Scott put his head down on the table, “to the last stack of paper,” he deadpanned.

Tango sighed, he got up and pat his teammate on the back.

“At least you’re not on Nether duty,” he said.

“I’m leading a double life! I’m lying to my husband, I’m lying to my friends, I’m lying to the whole Red Army! Who am I?,” Scott shouted; and he meant it more than he’d like to under the alcohol.

“Okay, that’s deeper than I wanna go,” Tango replied. He sat back down and chugged the last of his drink.

“I mean I’m just sitting here, letting other people write my life for me!” Scott continued.

“Okay calm down,” Tango said.

“No! I won’t. You have no idea what I’ve been through,” Scott stood up, his chair slammed on the ground.

Tango shot to his feet, “then enlighten me, Scott. Enlighten me on how hard your life has been while you ignored the rest of the server,” he yelled.

“While you sat back and did nothing, watching the world fall apart around you?” he provided.

“You don’t know me,” Scott said with disgust.

“And who does, Scott?” Tango replied.

The other couldn’t answer, because Tango was right. Scott nodded curtly, picked up his drink, and left the room.

He finished his drink on the way out and threw the glass against the rock face next to the abandoned cow farm.

The shards exploded and scattered in the snow.

Impulse found him sitting on a bolder an hour later, sharpening a stick with a rock.

“I heard you had a disagreement,” he said without warning.

Scott turned around, then resumed his sulking.

“We had an argument, you may as well call it what it is,” he replied.

“Hm,” Impulse responded.

“He insulted me,” Scott complained.

“Does “insulted” mean he said something true that you don’t like?” Impulse asked.

Scott didn’t respond.

Impulse leaned on the side of the bolder and looked into the distance, thinking about his next sentences. Chips of wood fell near his feet.

“You know it would be a lot easier if you two could just get along,” he said.

“Okay dad,” Scott deadpanned.

“Don’t start with me now. I’m trying to help you,” Impulse cautioned.

“Sorry,” Scott apologized. He felt worse when he insulted Impulse than when he insulted Tango.

“I know he’s a bit of a handful, but so are you. I want to make this as easy as possible, and I know you’re not looking to make friends right now, but I think you would feel better-“ Impulse started, Scott rolled his eyes and scoffed.

“You would feel better if you just,” he gestured with his hands between himself and Scott, “let us in,” Impulse finished a bit dejected.

Scott stopped sharpening his dwindling stick. He sighed and dropped it in his lap, putting his head on his knees.

“Who else can it be Scott? Don’t shut down on us like this,” Impulse begged.

“Leave me alone,” Scott said without hesitation.

Impulse lingered next to him, then pat his hand on the rock and nodded. He walked away.

Scott raised his head and watched him until his head disappeared under the hill.

[weird-person-935]

AU TIME!!!

So basically y’know that campfire scene in BO4? Yeah well in that part instead of Nikolai poisoning everyone, Ad accidentally contaminates the liquor with a drug only he can consume, killing everyone who drank it late in the night, Ad and Dempsey being the only to survive, Ad due to being immune and Tank because he first Drink that night. He had his own booze he drank instead. Not wanting to share germs with anyone being his reason. But that was 2 years ago…without Richthofen…the world has gotten worse. Jumping timeline to timeline using a book they can’t understand. Each time they see their “friends” Ad grows more and more paranoid…slowly driving himself Mad with guilt and drowning himself in drugs and alcohol. Tank desperately trying to keep him from dying at his own hands. Ad is simply a shell of what he once was…his words always slurred and his body weak and frail from never eating more then a meal a week. Dempsey is slowly losing hope himself. All they’ve done is look for the timeline where they fit in best…a new home…a better home….but its been years. Ad is on his last leg. Practically Richthofen and Nikolai mixed into one. They’re biggest fear has always been a reality in this case…they’re the only ones left. And there’s no light at the end of the tunnel. Only fire…and the screams of the dammed. More details below

TW&CW//Death, gore, ED, SH, Suicide mention, Drugs

What Ad say that night was nothing but chaos. The infected drink took only a hour to cause the effect it had on the crew. It started with Ultimis Nikolai who had drank the most the night. Small coughs turned into fits of practically puking blood, shaking and trembling as he desperately called out for help. Waking everyone from their slumber. By the time anyone has gotten near him, he was convulsing and foaming at the mouth, having torn his own eyes out and almost torn open his own throat trying to gasp for air. Next to fall was Primis Tank. Collapsing and grabbing at his throat as well, coughing up blood and practically having a seizure, his eyes going bloodshot as his mouth and eyes slowly started to drip red. Joining Nikolai on the floor. Now came panic. Takeo holding the body of Nikolai close, sobbing and trying to determine what had happened. Both Richtofens trying to figure out how or why they were poisoned. In that moment Richthofen fell next, as Ad watched in horror, he saw his love practically tear himself apart before ultimately taking the pain away himself, Then went Edward, though as soon as he felt the pain he went back inside his tent, bot wanting Ad to see him spray blood all over, then went the Takeos. Ultimis tearing out clumps of hair and screaming bloody murder as his heart exploded from the inside. Dying with Nikolai in his arms, soon slumping over and leaving a pule of blood toot surround them. Primis Was holding onto his Nikolai tightly. Both of them crying and making promises. As soon As He saw Takeo start to show pain. He looked at Ad and took Takeo in his arms, walking down the hill slightly to finish the job. 2 gun shots fill the air. Nikolai never returned that night…the only survivors were Ad and Tank…clinging onto each other for dear life, Ad was nothing but a mess of a person. Sobbing and desperately trying to crawl to Richtofen’s body, begging to be let go. It wouldn’t be till the morning when Ad would find the cause. his drugs were laying next to the bottle they drank. after that discovery Ad stopped eating and drinking. Only drinking water and eating once a week. Trying to starve himself to join his love. If Tank forces him to eat, he resorts to trying to bleed out. But is always saved by Tank. He feels nothing but pain each waking moment of his life. He wants to die but Tank keeps him alive. Still hoping to find them shelter. Ad knows he caused everything. But Tank wont let him say it out loud. Every day Ad gets worse. Tank growing more paranoid that one day when he wakes up…all he’s find is a puddle of blood…and a another friend gone in a instant. Please tell me your Thoughts!!

[laurenwritesfics]

The Pieces We Leave Behind

CHAPTER ONE: FRANK

Mary had buried herself in books again. She was a curious and intelligent young girl, but her love of reading was turning into obsession. So much so that Frank was beginning to worry about Vitamin D deficiency. She looked a little too pale. He usually hauled her out of her chair – met with screams and slaps of protestation – and took her to the beach or the park for ice cream, but today, he was piling her into the car to meet with the school principal. Mary had been accused of bullying, and Frank wasn’t going to let it stand.

“This is so stupid.” Mary huffed and crossed her arms. “I didn’t do anything.”

“I know, just get in the car.”

She rolled her eyes, slipping her backpack off her shoulder, throwing it onto the seat beside her. The engine of Frank’s 1974 sedan sputtered to life. Frank’s mother Evelyn called it a rickety rust-bucket, but it was his pride and joy – second only to his sweet, silly niece, who was currently sulking in the back seat.

That was the thing about Frank Adler. He didn’t fix broken things, he just knew when something was worth saving. He saw potential that nobody else could.

He was the first to break away from the family. He was tired, he said, of living a Stepford lie.

This was how he came to be Mary’s guardian. After the death of his sister Diane, the Adler family was irreparably splintered. In the midst of Evelyn’s grief, she had swept Mary up into a life she would never become accustomed to - piano lessons, private school, badminton, early bedtime and absolutely no television.

At just seven years old, Mary was wide-eyed and wise. A headstrong child who sometimes alarmed Evelyn with her ability to face the world fearlessly. Her teachers referred to her as ‘gifted’, which made Evelyn’s eyes light up. She was just like Diane. That was the beginning of the end of Mary’s childhood. Night after night, she would be tucked into bed with a book. As the months went by, childhood favorites were replaced with educational textbooks. Mornings started with a pop quiz. Her social circle grew smaller. She eventually found herself so frustrated by her restrictive life with Evelyn that she once threatened to run away, as children often do. But Evelyn knew that Mary meant it. So when it did finally happen, the thing that shocked her the most was not the act itself, but the fact that, of all people, Mary ran to Frank for help.

At ten years old, Diane scored her first grade A in mathematics. From that moment on, Evelyn decided to live vicariously through her daughter. She had devoted her youth to solving the Navier–Stokes problem (one of the unsolved Millennium Prize Problems), but had never been successful. Frank was the only one who saw her slowly disappear. Forced into a mold that didn’t fit her. He watched Diane suffer through countless socialite soirées, nodding politely, eyes glazed. He was the last person to call her. He found her. He blamed Evelyn.

She would never believe that the cause of death was suicide. Diane was so happy, she said. So intelligent. So perfect. Of course, perfection didn’t exist. She learned this a mere month later when her marriage fell apart.

Mary was the only piece of Diane that was left.

Frank knew that if Mary stayed in Boston with his mother, history would repeat itself. So he intervened. He sent care packages all the way from Florida. They called each other weekly. Six months into what Frank referred to as her kidnapping, he received a phone call in the middle of the night. She was uncharacteristically subdued. Whispering. Her voice trembled. She was trapped. Four hours later he was bundling her into a taxi. It wasn’t going to happen again. Not on his watch.

Evelyn would never forgive him, but he didn’t care. Frank loved his mother – he always would – he just didn’t like her.

The more time Mary spent in Florida, the more she began to dislike Evelyn, too.

It was an unspoken rule that Evelyn was informed of Mary’s achievements. She didn’t much care for the other things – the friendships, the slumber parties, the times she cried herself to sleep from stress and in fear of bullies – those were Frank’s problems. The only problems she cared about were mathematical. She didn’t visit on Mary’s seventh birthday, but she did attend the parent-teacher conference that came after it. Frank was sure that if Evelyn set foot in the principal’s office she would have a heart attack on the spot. So, here he was, driving Mary to school to correct the misinformed adults who believed that his niece was capable of hurting another child.

“Slow down!” Mary caught Frank’s eye in the rear-view mirror. “Mom said never go to bed or drive angry.”

“I’m not angry.” He said, almost flatly enough to mask his frustration.

“Yes you are.”

Frank tapped his index finger on the steering wheel. He counted to ten in his head, exhaling slowly.

“Fine, I’m angry.” He admitted. “These stuck-up bastards don’t know what they’re talking about.”

“Don’t swear.” Mary chided.

“Sorry.”

A short woman with a thin, pinched face emerged from the principal’s office.

Mary was leaning against the window, chin in her palm, counting the trees that passed by, partly to keep herself occupied, partly to quell the anxiety that was swirling inside her. She was always quiet, focussed, and polite. She went out of her way to make friends with the other children. This was entirely unfair. Back in Boston, she had spent time in almost every school in the city – co-ed, prep school, all-girls, but she never stayed too long. She was either too inquisitive, too restless, or – ironically – too smart. Sometimes it felt as though she didn’t belong anywhere at all.

Weaving through the long line of cars in the school parking lot, Frank stopped awkwardly and swung himself out of the car, keeping tight hold of Mary’s hand as they made their way inside. The occasional echo of chatter and footsteps cut through the otherwise silent hallway. The closer they got to the office, the easier it was for Mary to breathe. It was going to work out. Frank would take care of it. He had a talent for charming people into submission.

“Who’s that?” Frank straightened his shirt, still stained with oil and sweat from an afternoon spent fixing up a boat for a local fisherman.

“Mrs Weston.” Mary half-whispered, shrinking in her chair a little. “We hate her.”

Frank huffed, a grin tugging at the corners of his lips. “Yes we do.”

Then, an interruption from a harsh, husky voice.

“Mary Adler?”

Frank turned to Mary, slapping the arm of the chair. “Looks like we’re up, kiddo. You okay?” He tilted his head in concern.

“I guess.” Mary shrugged, her shoulders sinking for a moment before she pushed herself forward and took hold of Frank’s hand again.

The woman’s eyes narrowed and roamed over the two of them. She pursed her lips, paused, and finally spoke.

“Principal Mitchell is unavailable this morning.” She said curtly. “Vice-Principal Madeline Weston. Come in.”

Rustling papers. The pronounced tick-tick-tock of the clock on the wall. An awkward cough. Frank shifted in his seat, a creak eliciting from beneath the adult weight it clearly wasn’t made to support. Leaning out of a slouch, elbows resting on his knees, he tented his fingers and waited for the inevitable stretching of the truth. He raised his eyebrows expectantly, locking eyes with the woman who clearly didn’t know Mary at all.

“Do your worst.” Frank muttered not quite far enough under his breath.

“I take it you’ve done this before, Mr Adler?”

“Once or twice.”

A judgemental hum. “Then I’m sure you know why you’re here today. Mr Adler, your daughter-“

“She’s my niece.”

Madeline crossed her legs and adjusted her lapels. “Your niece is disruptive. She is preventing the other students from learning.”

“How, exactly?”

“Interruptions. Selfishness. Questions in math class are answered almost exclusively by Miss Adler.”

“Yeah, probably because she’s the only one who knows the answer.” Frank scoffed.

“Do not insult the quality of education provided at this school, Mr Adler.”

“I’m insulting the students. Mary can do so much better than here. She’s so smart – too smart.” His voice deepened, even and impassioned. “If you just took the time to get to know her-“

Madeline cut him off. “We don’t get to know the children here, Mr Adler. We encourage their talents.”

Frank tried and failed to fight the push in his calves compelling him to stand up. He tapped Mary’s shoulder and made his way to the door. Whether she liked it or not, Evelyn was going to hear about this.

“This is bullshit. Mary, we’re done here.”

Launching herself out of her chair with a scowl, Mary followed Frank back into the hallway.

“So that’s the Wicked Witch of the West, huh?”

Mary exploded into laughter.

The sun beat down on the asphalt as they re-entered the parking lot, hands pressing against searing metal, the air thick and musty inside the car. Frank adjusted the rear-view mirror, turned the key and hooked his arm around the passenger seat as he pulled away.

“Buckle up, genius. Let’s go get some ice cream.”

Read chapter one HERE. Read the full series on AO3.

Permanent taglist: @hiddelstannerbarnes  @redlipstickandblacktea @just-one-ordinary-fangirl​ @optimistic-dinosaur-nacho​ @djeniiscorner​ @its-tortle​ @k347​ @ixalit​ @iguessweallcrazyithinktho​ @cevansfics​ @capchrisevaans​ @hawkeyeandthewintersoldier​ @musette22​ @mcubabydotcom​ @worksby-d​ @chuckbass-love​ @bluemusickid​ @fallinforevans​ @hellobeautworld​ @katiew1973​ @just-dreaming-marvel​ @disaster-dean​ @rebthom89​ @navybrat817​ @just-dreaming-marvel-2​

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[hiitsbee]

Dear Fred | F.W.

Fred Weasley letter AU

Warning:sad content,references do death

Masterlist

Summary:After Fred’s death you leave a letter on his grave

You slowly walked towards the smooth,white gravestone:your steps were unsure,the breath stuck down your throat as you weren’t ready yet to see the cold stone with the name of your loved one engraved on its front.

In loving memory of Fred Weasley

A son

A brother

A dear friend

A caring boyfriend

And a brave fighter

April 1st,1978-May 2nd,1998

Forever missed

Never forgotten

You kneeled down and while closing your eyes you took a long breath,wiped away a tear which wet your cheek and took out the letter you had written the day before to read it one last time.

From:Y/n

To:Fred (Freddie) Weasley

Dear Fred,

I’m here collecting my thoughts. So many things are going on in my mind,so may words would love to fly from my hand to the paper,so many feelings are exploding inside me,twisting my stomach,my heart,my senses. Dizziness makes my sight almost blurred;”wicked” maybe you’d say jokingly,”painful” I’d reply scolding. But I have no one to reply like that to,so why have you left? I have no one to scold now,I have no one to laugh with,to open up with. Normaly now I’d come to you,I’d seat on your bed,in between your legs,with my head leaned against your shoulder or in the croock of your neck,and I’d tell you what I’m feeling. You would listen,you would silently listen to my words and then you would hug me,caress my hair,let me stroke my face against the cloth of your warm sweater,leave kisses on my head and then you would say something that would make me feel a little bit happier,you would make me laugh you would...you would just be yourself,the caring,funny,goofy boy I fell in love with at Hogwarts. That boy stole my heart. He stole every little wind coming out from my mouth. He stole the emptiness of my dreams and filled it with his smile,that boy stole every seed of sadness,replacing them with little,shiny stars of happiness,and I do really think that it made life angry,so much angry that she decided to take him away from me and leave just an empty space. A space as empty as Hogwarts at 5am in the morning,when we used to run out from our dorms to meet on the astronomy tower to see the dawn. Can you see it from where you are now? Yesterday I did. I woke up at 5am,or better,I didn’t sleep at all,I was busy thinking about you...but that’s not the point;the point is that I woke up and ran to the astronomy tower thinking that seeing the sun rising would make me feel better. It didn’t. I cried. I cried because while running there wasn’t the sound of your laugh,there wasn’t your hand holding mine,your breath filling the silence. It was just me running in the shadow of my loneliness,looking like a psycho with the ruined mascara I had forgot to take off the night before. That was the moment I realised that seeing the dawn didn’t matter anymore,or maybe it had never mattered in my entire life because everything I cared about was seeing it with you. Then I reached the tower and I looked at the sun. I felt nothing but more pain. A pain growing every time the sun showed a new part of itself,and it ended with me hiding my face in between my hands not to see it anymore because even the sun was reminding me of you.

I see you everywhere,Freddie,I can’t stand it anymore. I see you at the burrow,at the joke shop,I see you even when George greets me. Poor George he’s so sad. The last weekend I slept at your house:I heard him crying for the whole night. The whole night,Freddie,do you know what it means? Life teared him apart as much as she did with me,maybe even more. You need to know that Sunday morning I step in the bathroom and saw him reading the instructions of some bottles. I asked him what they were and he replied it was hair dye,blonde hair dye to be exact. I demanded him if he went crazy:he lifted up his head,showing me some red teary eyes and said “Fred’s presence is making me crazy”. He dyed his hair because in the mirror he couldn’t see anything more than you. No one can change chapter,read a new line of the book wich is our life. We’re all stuck at the same sentence and we all will be for so long. I’ve been asking myself what I’m going to do with my life. Will I ever fall in love with someone again? Will I love them as much as I loved you? Will I see you in their behaviour? Will I tell them how the boy I once loved died? I’m concerned because I know that I’ll always compare them to you. They might gift me with a flower and I’d probably ask myself “would Fred gift me with the same flower? Or would he give me something different?” and what if the answer is “he would give me something different” would I still like the present?I’m going crazy,Freddie,I really am. Your absence is making me crazy. I want to feel you. I want to feel your kisses,your hugs,I want to hear your soft voice whispering to my hear that everything’s a nightmare,that soon I’ll wake up and you’ll be there,next to me,comforting me with your presence. How long does it take to forget what really made you feel alive? You died Freddie,and that day a part of me died with you. It’s buried in the same grave as yours,so please,my dear Freddie,take care of that part until we’ll meet again. Take care of that part as mush as you took care of me when you were here. Watch out for me,sometimes tell me if I’m doing good,help me if I’ll ever need. You were my biggest sourch of reassurance and safety,a presence no one will ever replace. I’m sorry if it will be hard for you to read this letter because of my tears which ruined the ink of the words. Will you read it? Wherever you are will you do it? Can you promise me? Do it Freddie,plese,and then give me a sign. I love you.

Forever yours,

the one who loved you like no one else,

Y/n.

After reading you folded the paper sheet and put it into a small white envelope you closed with a litte piece of red paper,you took the red roses you bought on the way there and left everything on Fred’s grave. Then you made a little step back and looked for a few seconds at his imagine,smiling with more tears coming down from your eyes. In that moment a drip fell on your forehead,and then another one,and another,a few minutes later the sky was pouring rain all over you. It was the sign you asked for. Fred had read the letter and now he was crying with you.

[klaus-is-the-real-number-1]

Stop crying your heart out (Number 5 x reader)

ASK: I saw the post you reblogged about Five crying and I was wondering if you could do one like that, where Five is so frustrated, hits the point where he breaks and reader tries to comfort him (if reader could be taller than him I would love that) maybe at first he doesn’t want to get comfort bc makes him “weak”, but eventually gives in? I just love angsts. 

A/N: Not the most angsty but it is a lil, hope this was what you were hoping for!

Words:1176

Anger is fire. Smouldering embers ready to set fire to anything it comes in contact with, spreading and engulfing with no remorse to those in its path. It can either grow and blossom or wilt and die like a plant, it just needs the right conditions to keep it alive. Someone taken over with anger is unstoppable, unpredictable and uncontrollable, not caring who they hurt in their path, just like fire. Eventually, all fires must come to a stop, wether its life is ended by opposing forces or it burns itself out but either way, it doesn’t go out without a fight.

Anger is destruction, annihilating everything within reach and leaving a wreckage behind it. Once it had taken over, nothing would stop the carnage it caused to the person who was infected and their surroundings, total demolition occured. But he was a gazelle in an ever expanding jungle, swift, sagacious, secretive. Only he knew where the jungle was but he couldn’t hide his scent forever, soon the hyenas would catch up and finally have the last laugh.

Buzzing filled the quiet room, reaching out desperately trying to find the source of the noise in the ungodly hour of the night. Finally, your hand lands on your buzzing phone, squinting to read the screen before answering, not even being able to get a word as words rushed into your half asleep mind. Objects came into focus as your eyes adjusted to the darkness that resided in your room, not even being able to understand the fast paced words that were hurtling towards you. “Klaus, please slow down.”

“Something’s up with Five.”

Rain pounded onto the streets as you ran towards the Academy, thunder roaring in the sky. Coldness seeped into your core as your clothes became drenched from the rain, puddles splashing as you collided with them at full force, droplets splashing up as if an atom bomb had gone off. Feeling like a fish in an ever expanding pond, finally being caught by predator, your heart raced thinking about the worst case scenario that could be happening in the Academy.

But you weren’t paying attention, being careless with your steps in your haze of worry. Head first, you collided with the rough ground, air forcing its way out of your lungs and hands burning as they tried to brace your fall. There was no time to think about the ever growing burning radiating up your palms and into your palms and up your legs, almost meeting in the middle but you didn’t care, you had to make sure he was okay.

The dark doors loomed down on you as you reached out to knock before slowly pushing it open. Moonlight illuminated the hallway as you stepped in only to throw you back into the darkness of the unknown, back into the ever expanding pond in which you were oh so small. Shaking from the cold, you slowly made your way up the stairs, knowing exactly which turns and twists to take to get to Fives room. A small crowd was gathered anxiously by his door, shocked eyes took in your shaken and soaked figure adorned with grazed knees and hands.

A small smile came over your face when you saw the Hargreeves siblings, only to drop when you heard the silence echoe in the corridor with nervous looks between you and Fives door. Taking a deep breath, you twist the doorknob, not knowing what to expect. Five had these moments where every now and again he would forget where he was, forget that there wasn’t an impending apocalypse; or at least that we knew about, but when he got like this he was a bomb, just ticking away waiting to explode.

When he explodes it’s as if a petrol bomb was thrown, his flames of anger and sorrow charing everything he touches, unstoppably spreading until he burnt himself out. All anyone could do is wait it out, wait for the wildfire to stop spreading to then care for the embers after to make sure they went out. It was a hard task for everyone involved but always took an even harder emotional toll on Five, just as he gets better it happens again and there was no clear trigger that lights him up, there was never any warning.

As you closed the door quietly behind you, your eyes rested on the complete carnage that lay ahead, writing upon writing was scribbled all over the walls that had been freshly painted, books lay sprawled across the floor, open at random pages with some even torn out or wrote on. Snapped pencils and scrunched up paper piled over the trash can and littered onto the floor, almost providing a trail that led somewhere, someone. 

Five was bunched up in the corner, his knees tightly pressed against his chest with his face covered by his hands almost making himself appear as small as possible. Slowly, you approach the quivering boy, unsure if his embers will turn into a flame as you touch him or will die out into a smoke; he was unpredictable.

“Five?” Kneeling down next to him you cautiously place your hand on his shoulder, unsure of his next actions.

“It just doesn’t make sense.” Suddenly he sprung up, muttering to himself, going back to pacing around his room. Words such as ‘apocalypse’ and ‘end of the world’ flowed from his mouth. All you could do is stay on the floor and repeat his name but it only fell on deaf ears, it was like he couldn’t even see you were in the room. 

On the fifth repeat of his name his head snapped towards you sat on the floor as if he had only just realised where he was at all, his eyes scanned the torn apart room as you stood up and got closer to him. His frantic eyes met yours but never really saw you, his eyes were clouded with fear. “The world is going to end in ten days.”

“Five we’re not in 2019 anymore.” Carefully you grabbed his shoulders, forcing him to look at you to try and break the trace like frantic state he was in. “You’re safe now.”

All of a sudden, a heartbreaking sob wretched its way out of him, almost involuntarily. His fire had been put out as the aftermath rolled over, tears streamed down his face as he struggled to breathe through his sorrow. Pushing you away, he turned, not wanting you to see him in the state he was, he couldn’t be seen as weak.

Anxiously, you stepped in front of him and held him close, wrapping your arms around him so he couldn’t escape. He weakly tried to pry from your grip, his sobs only growing stronger but you stay put. Eventually, he gave up trying to push you away, allowing you to hold him before reciprocating the hug. You gently rest your head on top of his, bringing your hand to stroke his hair as he continued to cry.

“You’re safe now, Five.”

[fireheartfaery]

and i fell apart

I got very obsessed with maelin and went on a tumbles binge. While the content is INCREDIBLE there just wasn't enough so I'm adding to the pile with *gestures to whatever this is*. Please enjoy! Let's not pretend this was edited lmaooo

to Jana (@flamingveritas​): for the compliments and falling down the maelin rabbit hole with me

i highly recommend listening to rosier/punk2 by brakence while reading this. if i could i would have just copy pasted the song and made that the fic.

I left home now I'm fucked up

Realized how much I loved you

Whole goddamn life, been a suck-up

Now I'm just tryna get my luck up

All the pain went when you kissed me

—rosier/punk2, brakence

Manon has indulged, feverently and with vicious delight, in all manner of debauchery and sin over her many years. She has sipped the blood of men like fine whiskey, and kissed women like morning dew clinging to rosy petals. Most especially, she has never denied herself a pleasure.

Once her gold eyes lock on a target it's as good as hers, already weaving into her present and past. It is no longer a thing of the future to her. No because that would imply she still needed to get it, that it was not hers yet. It is something she simply refuses to accept.

Which is why, blood boiling, iron nails glinting viciously in the midday sun, she snarls at the blonde haired, blue eyed queen. The most beautiful being she has ever seen and by far the most infuriating. Manon has never wanted to lick someone's lips while simultaneously driving a dagger through their heart so godsdamn much in her life.

"Get your ass back here, Queen." She can barely keep the growl out of her voice. She feels half beast.

"Fuck you Witch," Aelin sneers, "You don't get to tell me what to do. Not anymore."

Manon is in front of her before the wind can catch in her snow white hair. With another grumble clawing through her throat, she plants her feet in front of the blonde. It takes everything in her not to melt at the fierce beauty she is met with. Gold spun hair, rivaling her own eyes, and sun smattered freckles and arched eyebrows. There's a look in the queen's eye that makes Manon want to pull them too close for decency and see how much of the pretty gold ring swallows that blue gaze.

"You owe me." She says instead. There is no gentleness in her voice. They have never been gentle with each other.

"I owe you nothing." Aelin spits. "I stopped having anything to do with you the day you left me."

"I didn't leave you." She explodes. She cannot go on like this. She can't bear it.

"Oh," The queen's voice takes on that high pitched tone, as if she's attempting to be snappy but her emotion is betraying her. She carries on despite it all. "Well, sorry for thinking that coming home to a note that says 'I'll be gone for a some time' and then not having a wife for ten years doesn't count to you."

There are tears running down that beautiful face and it makes every part of Manon wither away. She is made of iron but it takes one look at Aelin's crumpling composure to reduce her to rust and ruin.

"If I was gone for three hundred years I would still be your wife. No matter how long, or how far." Her voice is disturbed dust on a locked chest.

"Please leave." The queen shakes her head, stumbling backwards, away from her, from them. "I can't do this. I won't."

"I'm not going anywhere Aelin." Her voice cracks and she wants to curse herself for sounding so weak. But this is not a matter of blood and teeth and enemy. This is a matter of heart and she would always be weak when it came to the person who owned hers.

"That's what you said every day before you left for a decade." It is so quiet, so unbelievably quiet it feels almost as if the world hushed to hear that statement.

Her chest feels like it's been struck by lightning. She cannot imagine anything else would make her heart beat so fast while killing her so slowly.

"I didn't have a choice." She shakes her head. The words are coming out wrong. Will they ever be right?

"You had the choice to tell me."

At this her mouth curls into a snarl, gold eyes flashing with rage. "I would never have put your life in danger like that."

"We could have faced it together." Aelin bites her quivering lower lip. "Like we always have."

"I will never risk you, I will never put you in harms way if I can handle it myself."

"Maybe you could have handled it Manon," Her wife sighs, tears still rippling down her golden cheeks. They carve rivers over her freckles, making them stones on the riverbed. "Or maybe we could have done it together and it would have taken five years instead of ten. Or maybe you could have gone alone and I would have kissed you goodbye and said come back soon."

"That is—"

"Instead," The blonde interrupts, sadness, true grief, covering her face like a veil. "Instead I woke up to an empty bed one morning and it just never ended. Everyday I wondered if you had left because you no longer loved me, or if you had been dragged away, or if you went on a mission and had not survived it. Every day I thought of your white hair and your gold eyes and the smile you have when the wind dances across your skin and I didn't understand why I could no longer see it, see you."

Tears, hot and salty, stream down Manon's face. It is violent and full of agony. She isn't going to survive this. How could she?

"But I'm back now." She gutters.

"For how long?" The question is laced with exhaustion as if it had been asked to the point of meaningless.

How long will she be gone? How long can I live like this? How long should I wait before I try to find her? How long before I realize she doesn't want to be found? How long has she stopped loving me? She sees the questions reflected in those blue-jeweled eyes. It snaps the chords of her heart, like broken piano strings.

"Forever."

"That tells me nothing."

She doesn't know what to say, doesn't know how to make this right. She would do anything. She would suffer through hell if it meant making this okay again. If it meant standing by her wife's side once more, instead of loving her from so far away.

"Please Aelin," She breaks, cracks so hard her jaw snaps. "How do I make this better? How do I fix us?"

"I don't know," Blonde hair glitters in the sun as she shakes her head. It catches like a halo. "I don't know and it hurts so much and I can't—" She is hyperventilating.

Manon wants to go to her, wants to wrap her arms around the queen and hold her until they've both stitched themselves back together. But she knows she will be shoved away, so far and so fast she will not be able to recover.

"I love you Aelin." She says. Her voice is quiet but her words are clear as Terassen waters. "And I will love you through every season to come, and every sunset we witness while on the back of abraxos, and every morning I catch you with chocolate cake before breakfast, and every evening that you read a book to me, and every moment I find your lips perfectly slanted over mine. I will love you through this life."

They had never placed their love in the past. Manon had never said "I have loved you since", she always says, "I will love you through..."

"And I will love you through the next."

The sobs that wrack the queen's body make the witch's hands shake. She cannot believe she has hurt her love so much, so carelessly, so destructively.

"I don't need you to love me through the next. I needed you to love me through this one."

"I do!" She cries. "I do, I do, I do. How could I not?" There is distance between them that no bridge can cross, but she can reach out a hand and brush her fingers across a tear-streaked cheek. So close in body, so far in heart.

"I will not survive if you leave me again." Her queen sobs. Manon sobs with her.

"I cannot survive leaving you."

Hands, smaller than hers, infinitely more warm, find her own. "I love you through the darkness."

"Until it claims us." She finishes softly.

And ever so gently, intertwined only by their fingers, they begin to stitch together. The future is theirs, and it is the only guarantee.

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[image id: white all caps text, on a black background, that reads, “i thought you were dead”. end id]