#IM ACTIVELY LOSING IT I DONT EVEN HAVE AN INTELLIGENT POST TO MAKE

[god-tier-bastard]

hey. im never gonna not be losing my mind over this.

[probably-haven]

Hello!

So I’m the anon who asked for more Archon War Venti headcanons and I just loved it! I really like reading your headcanons cuz some of them are similar to mine but mostly are headcanons that I didn’t think of so it really is nice to read and see your thoughts about Venti!

I feel like as if I’m asking too much but could you keep doing these types of headcanons? Like it doesn’t have to be Archon War headcanons but like some headcanons about Venti’s relationship with the Ragnvindrs and Gunnhildrs. Because the first Gunnhildr was the first one who prayed to Barbatos and the first Ragnvindr was his friend who left but came back and I really wanna hear your thoughts on that!

And I’ve decided to get off anon cuz you just replied to my texts and I wasn’t expecting that so I’ve got a short confidence boost that I am completely taking advantage of! And thanks for the advice! or uhh comment? observation? I’m not entirely sure but thank you for that! I’ve heard that be said to me a few times and I have been trying to be more, uhh, assertive so thanks for that!

rfouierjkhfkecs i actually came across information on Gunnhildr and the "Red-haired warrior" yesterday when i was doing more research into the rebellion against Decarabian and I was like "wow this would be really fucking fun to research and theorize on, but its too specific/niche to include unprompted no matter how much i want to" but bestie you prompted, and im literally so happy right now because I didn't think I'd ever really get the chance to post about them!

also lmao yeah, i tend to try and reply to as much as I can, since it's a good feeling when someone does and all. but yeah, no problem! I’m glad you felt confident enough to reveal XD. 

This may be structured a bit more like analysis/theory/just citing canon things at first before it gets into a more headcanony format.

ehe i have so much free reign on this it's lovely

More Archon War Era Venti: one two three

spoilers for Venti's backstory and Diluc's(kinda, i think, just in case)

first things first, laying down some canon background because before yesterday i hadn't heard of either of them outside of that one cutscene.

the very reason Decarabian had his storm wall up in the first place was because at the time Andrius had declared war on him- and his tower, and the city of Mondstadt by extent, were basically constantly under attack by Andrius's blizzards, which since he was still alive back then, were a lot bigger and covered basically what seems to be the whole of Mondstadt outside the barrier.

This meant that people had two options. Live in the city under Decarabian's oppression, or live outside the barrier, and brave the blizzards of a warring god... which was not a good idea

but the Gunnhildr clan(not yet called that) tried- and they almost died because of it. In the midst of a blizzard, the clan chief's daughter, named Gunnhildr(which the clan would be named after later) sent out a prayer that was heard by a wandering wind spirit. And the faith of that prayer gave the spirit enough power to create a small shelter to protect them.

When her father past, she became the new leader and also a priestess. She would later lead the clan to fight Decarabian alongside four others. And basically the Gunnhildr Clan ended up as like sworn protectors of Mondstadt

-

as for the red-haired warrior, who is basically assumed to be the earliest known ancestor of the Ragnvindir clan(im gonna refer to as Ragnvindir for convenience sake, even though "Ragnvindir" is technically a different character from Vanessa's era)theres not much information on him, but heres what i have from the various wiki's

- he was a wanderer

- one of the first to use the sign of windblume to find other rebels(so he's intelligent)

- actively propped up the nameless bard so he could watch as the tower was destroyed

there's this little tidbit too from the Windblume Ode bow's description that im probably gonna talk about a considerable amount too: "Atop the ruins of the ancient tower, amidst the cheers, songs, and tears of those who had newly won their freedom. A red-haired warrior turned his back on the newborn god, hidden like a single raindrop in a tidal wave of humanity. He was first among those who passed the secret sign of Windblume, the one who wove threads of dawn throughout the long night. His name has since been lost to time, but his deeds are still remembered in song." followed later by "The fate of this clan will likely never change: they shall ever live in the darkness and bring forth the flame of dawn."

-

Now I'm going to start with the Ragnvindir(geez, why's it spelled like that tho)

My idea of his character is basically formed by a mix of Ragnvindir stereotypes and just generally analyzing text.

So what do we know about Ragnvindir's for sure? they are shady motherfuckers- or at least they rarely operate in the spotlight. also damn, these guys are more cursed than anemo vision wielders- like the only one who didn't canonically lose someone close to them was Crepus, but considering that Diluc doesn't exactly have a mom..... he probably did

so what do we know? - he was close with the nameless bard - he was intelligent - he likely operated primarily from the shadows "ever living in the darkness" - he was a wanderer - he abandoned Venti during the celebration - but his deeds were still remembered in song, so Venti and him were likely still close

now the question of the century: how will i choose to interpret "turned his back on the newborn god"? And honestly, I'm- not sure- at first i assumed he abandoned him completely- but Venti did still make sure to carry on his memory- which could just be Venti being Venti, but for the sake of sanity, this is how I'm interpreting it.

A lot of things happened to the Ragnvindir that day. He lost a friend, saw another become a god to replace the one they had conquered, and he saw his goal, his reason for being in Mondstadt, come to fruition. "see the world through my eyes" the bard had said, and the Ragnvindir had been a wanderer even before. Sure, the people had won freedom, and that was to be celebrated, but he's intelligent to recognize that people would likely see him as one of the key figures in leading the rebellion. And for him this was a solemn time, and ending to a chapter, and not being one to operate in the spotlight, the last thing he'd want is to be swept up in festivities and attention at a time like this.

It also likely didn't help that he's probably smart enough to understand the idea of "power corrupts," and seeing the wind sprite just readily accept the mantle of Archon was likely not the most comforting thing to happen in the given situation after all. But Decarabian was gone, and Andrius had ceased his blizzards, so without a word, he slipped into the crowd and left, a wanderer once more.

-

now back to Gunnhildr

she was the first to receive an anemo vision from Barbatos, no I do not take criticism on this "the power bestowed on her by Barbatos" like please, they basically said it.

It also mentions that she crowned Venti with laurels(symbol of vistory) after the battle- the book Biography of Gunnhildr additionally says "the Gunnhildr Clan will continue honoring the legacy of its ancestors and its duty to the Anemo Archon: to protect Mondstadt, the land and all who inhabit it, forever."

I really like this because it conveniently ties into my past headcanon about Venti granting visions to the people of Mondstadt and having them be the ones to erect wind barriers and defend the city in his absence.

So in the Archon War I like to imagine that the Gunnhildr clan had a lot of people who were actually granted visions and were basically in charge of protecting it from those who would attempt to ambush them.

Mondstadt essentially became known for this- the fact that the mortals within it were strong enough to fend off the force of a god without support from their own.

but regardless, Gunnhildr, as she had before, served as a priestess to Barbatos, the closest thing that Mondstadt had to a ruler, and yet she only took charge of prayer and protection.... i hate to just- equate them to their descendants- but to an extent- her role was kind of like a merge between Jean and Barbara- Except with a whole lot less structure.... i really dont want their characters to just be carbon copies of the descendants but- c'mon, the comparison was right there.

anyways besties- back to Venti so i can tie them in

The Archon War was one of the worst times for Venti in his entire life thus far. And the time immediately after Decarbian's fall, while Gunnhildr and the Ragnvindir were still alive, was the key period of time in which things could have gone very differently.

Venti is the god of freedom. That's a reoccurring theme and I think I've made that abundantly clear. But during this time, Venti was anything but free.

I've mentioned before how he would stay far from the city of Mondstadt so the shockwave of his death wouldn't reach him, should he fall.... well- Venti is new to a lot of things- godhood- humanity- war- freedom- and at this point he was trying hard to figure out how to be Mondstadt's god without becoming Decarabian, and while still being able to survive, and make sure they survived, and see the world for his friend, and carry on his friends legacy.

And this is a lot of stuff for what was once a carefree elemental being, and there were certain things that had to be done for this to happen. He couldn't just stay in Mondstadt, or he would grow weak and his people would be vulnerable to attack, but he couldn't abandon it, because despite being able to fend for themselves, there's always hat just in case. He couldn't stay in any one place outside of Mondstadt for very long or he'd be found and killed. He knew in order for Mondstadt to survive he would have to take an active role in the war, strengthen himself so he could defend Mondstadt, and thats exactly what he did.

He started by going after the less powerful gods, ones he had a chance at beating with the power he got from the Gunnhildr clan and the rest of Mond, and by wiping them out, he would grow stronger, so he kept it up- working his way up the metaphorical ladder.

but he couldn't let anyone near him either, because he knew just what would happen if he was attacked then. Were it not for Gunnhildr's prayer, the early years of the Archon War would have been without contest the loneliest time of his life, and there would be nothing he could do about it, bound by survival and his attachment to the legacy of his friend, constantly fearing for his life and going against his very nature as the god of freedom. Frankly thrust into that circumstance that early on, and having to face it alone, it's likely that Venti would have caved under the pressure and dropped his attachment to either his survival, or to his friends legacy... or just something entirely worse(isolation messes with brains) so I'm attributing the fact that he didn't do that to Gunnhildr's companionship, speaking to him and guiding him through it as he had guided her through the blizzard some time ago.

I also like to think that she's responsible for founding at least a number of the different celebrations that still happen in Mondstadt even now.

Ugh supportive warrior priestess- we stan

anyway meanwhile! we got the Ragnvindir

He hears about Venti taking part in the Archon war during his wanderings and returns to Mondstadt to check in, wary of what he might find.

Venti, who hadn't seen him since the rebellion, is elated to say the least and they do a bit of catching up because they need it

and then the conversation turns more serious, and the Ragnvindir brings up a third thing that Venti needs to hold onto- his humanity.

See, in the early years, just desperate to get a foothold on the world, Venti's first number of targets were just indiscriminately going after those he knew to be weaker than him, and the Ragnvindir points this out, saying that while it's not necessarily bad, if he keeps doing it, it won't be long until he causes his and, by extent, Mondstadt's legacy to be tainted by a reputation for slaughter, no better than any of the other bloodthirsty gods that frequented the war's fields. "Think of what the bard would do, we were both close enough to do that much"

And Venti becomes yet more caged, but recognizes that he's right, and this is another turning point, that in the coming years would keep Venti from losing himself.

also- Gunnhildr, Venti having told her about the Ragnvindir's concerns that he now shared, probably organized some kind of event (not unlike the right of part, but also, yes unlike it) that was deliberately intended and designs to serve as an excuse that Venti could chose to take to visit Mondstadt, something she know he desperately wanted to do, but wouldn't allow himself for fear of putting them in danger. But if she made it an official celebration, then it would give Venti the opportunity to visit his people again, under the guise of it being a responsibility, not having to deal with the moral implications of doing so at a time when he was already dealing with enough of those already.

Also on his travels, the Ragnvindir probably started and spread a number of rumors that could end up working in Venti's favor, not that anyone ever knew it was him of course.

basically Gunnhildr protected the people of Mondstadt and did all she could to keep everyone in as high spirits as possible, Venti included.

And as for the Ragnvindir, he took a more realistic approach, traveling and getting venti followers in far places, spreading false information about him, and just overall making sure that Venti didn't do things he'd regret.

And when they died, Venti would carry their legacy with him as well, not losing his humanity to the tide of war as he very nearly had(though he still often came close), and trying to spreading high spirits where ever he could without fail.

[creacherkeeper]

hey same anon from before!! and yeah i meant general headcanons/ aelwyn + the bad kids dynamics/ honestly whatever fh headcanons you have so lmao you’re good. if you have any more know i would LOVE to read them but no pressure of course!!

oh okay dope ^^ thank you for clarifying. but ...... while we’re here ...... MIGHT AS WELL TALK ABOUT SOME ND HEADCANONS EHH??

of course disclaimer that these are just my own reading and everyone is entitled to read it differently, but i’ll try to back up my takes as much as i can

-

adaine (autism & panic disorder) - detail-oriented problem solver, thrives under the structure of school but doesnt do well with overwhelm, organized, seems sensitive to noises (like if the bad kids are being loud or rowdy), extremely earnest and forward even in situations where its inappropriate and doesnt always understand when its actually hurting her goals (see: every time an npc has to go “whats your deal? can i help you?” to adaine), tends to fumble some spontaneous speech (come backs in fights or like. the WHOLE thing with the innkeeper), very knowledgeable and skilled in a specific area of interest (divination magic), thrives with an emotional support animal, possibly ace (for sure not all autistic people are but we tend to be in much higher numbers), vibes with ayda almost immediately (by like. just straight up asking if she wants to be friends), very direct when talking, strong sense of justice and morality and gets very frustrated when things dont work how she thinks they should

riz (autistic) - hyperfixates on cases (both in the ‘losing track of time’ and ‘has trouble thinking of other things while out and about’ way), odd sense of fashion, has trouble making friends and understanding relationship dynamics (him thinking he was friends with the popular kids in ep1, being obsessed with finding penny who was his babysitter but then they dont really hang out after, being very verbal about fabian being his best friend even though fabian is embarrassed), ace, detail-oriented problem solver, sleeping issues, CAN lie but tends to be very direct to the point of being rude and abrasive at times, very defined moral code and strong sense of justice, easily frustrated in certain situations, intimidated by social interactions (especially with people he doesnt know), struggles with self-care and self-maintenance, i dont know exactly how to categorize the hissing but im throwing that in here too, doesnt always have “average” emotional reactions (like being really excited about the video of his dad instead of upset), very mature interests for his age

gorgug (autistic) - trouble with communication (putting his thoughts into words, tends to speak very slowly with a lot of pauses, doesnt always know what to say or what the average person in his situation would say), has a hard time making friends, struggles with emotional regulation (you can read barbarian rage as this in general but im also thinking of him getting mad at the high elves and just having to run around to calm down), very emotionally intelligent but doesnt always come across that way because of communication struggles, understands the value of having things explained in a simple and accessible way and does so without judgement or embarrassment if others need him to, thinks in a different way and comes to conclusions others dont seem to (sometimes he’s completely correct and other times .... dad!?), uses sensory input to regulate emotions (mostly music/drumming), screams when overwhelmed, doesn’t always ‘get the point’, is a very good friend but is so with great intention and care

fabian (adhd + dyslexia) - doesnt enjoy school, has some Very Bad Rolls when it comes to books and reading, doesnt think he’s as smart as his friends, struggles with a disconnect of identity (how he sees himself and his family vs how other people see him), very physical and physically active, tends to default to loud and “rowdy” (as adaine put it), struggles with emotional regulation, very sensitive but would NOT admit that, doesn’t always understand social cues or when he’s being rude, struggles with impulse control

fig (adhd + autism) - sensory seeking (especially music & the physical element of playing music which can be read as stimming, as well as smoking cloves), disconnect between how she sees herself (mysterious closed book) and how others see her (incredibly open and earnest), feels like a social chameleon and slips into roles very easily but has trouble feeling like and understanding herself; very excitable, engaged, reactive, and verbal; runs away when she feels uncomfortable or overwhelmed, tends to wander from the group a lot, admits several times that she wasn’t paying attention or doesnt remember key info about the plot, builds an identity around deviation from societal norms, big emotions, lots of energy, cares very deeply but actively works on understanding boundaries, doesnt always pick up on social cues

kristen (cptsd) - discussed in this post but can be summed up as issues with affect and emotional regulation, cognitive/executive functioning issues, difficulty with boundaries, struggles with impulse control, goes from VERY self-restrictive to VERY loose with sexual activity, drugs, alcohol, tattoos, etc; struggles with self-concept, doubt, and trust issues; possibly has dissociative and/or depersonalization tendencies with her cleric abilities 

so 8))))) yeah. bad kids neurodivergence headcanons ahoy

[gg-astrology]

What do you suggest for those who are beginners in astrology? Like how can they improve their learnings more?

Hey there!! 💞💞💞💞 Aaah what a great question!! 💞💞 Thanks so much for asking and giving me opportunity to talk about it!!!! 💞💞This can probably apply to ppl who aren’t beginner-beginner too?? 💞💞It might be good for?? content creators?? as well?? Maybe?? 💞💞

Tips for learning/progressing into astro (maybe??) 🌟

Check the ‘astro asks masterlist’ for stuff on jus… learning astro?? this also for astro, but more/extended??? something you might wanna hear if you’ve been feeling down/demotivated lately or jus need a lil pick me up/kick in the bum – for general stuff, community, things we can do/things we should guard, etc 💞

🚫long post 🚫

Keep an open mind? 💞 It’s easy to get swept up in something/join a set of mentality/believe it’s right because it’s there and people believe it or you have experience™️ that ‘justify’ the thing (‘its what i see so it’s what i believe/know’) Do your research, don’t categorize/group things together, learn to dissect and differentiate. Try not to be prejudice/keep an open heart and mind (it’s not that hard to do, you just gotta ‘check’ yourself for it)  💞💞

What you’re exposed to influences your take on subjects/topics, so be discerning and critical that you aren’t grouping things together or taking it as it is. Learning isn’t just about?? our senses right?? So combine it together (balance it out) and try not to close your opinion/guard yourself up alright (mind v senses v heart v doing stuff v learning things and retaining knowledge)? 💞  

There’ll be interpretation that connects with you and those you just ‘take’ as ‘I don’t get it but it seems right’ – make sure to find out why you don’t get it. It’s a hint that there’s a reasoning/way to explain it that rings closer to you. You might be a person who understands certain things explained a certain way, you might not. 

Figure out a way to resonate with the hypothesis, because then you understand it and you’re on top of how to interpret it. 

If someone proposes a limitation or different interpretation for it, you can adjust and learn how to incorporate it into your understanding better as well (because you get it, you understand it. It’s personal to you now – we have 12 signs in our chart it’s just a matter of connecting that knowledge together and knowing what it means as well) 💞

Find your own way of saying what you mean. Nothing is stagnant as it seems, it’s always like a little buoy in the middle of the sea when it comes to certain subject make sure to express that out and measure where you are on that sea-level as well. 

Support others, or at least try not to be a dick to them over things 💞 This is also in-line with reaching out to others and not trying to go through shit alone 💞 How does this relate to learning astro? We might not think we need people but wow does it help a hell lot (and also we do need people?? that’s a– thing?? astrology vs astronomy)💞

Have a good connective system, mutuals, friends. Be open to people and treat others the way you want to be treated 💞 Have someone to support you, catch you out on your shit or help you re-think/brainstorm the way you handle or react to stuff (buddy-system it if you can) 💞 

Knowing that someone can give you a second glimpse, double-check and wishes well for you/is in your corner helps tremendously even though logically we might not ‘need it’ (if you don’t want a ‘study buddy’ or ‘group study’ then that’s perfectly ok??💞💞 jus make sure you have someone supportive of you and your interests, people who won’t tear you down if you manifest yourself?? 

Reach out to others, it helps. But don’t use them for resource?? that’s just– a shitty thing to do with people if you don’t want to have a genuine interaction with them.💞

You’d be surprised at how many people we might hold dear might tear you down?? Don’t wanna scare you so you can skip if you want. But whether they do it consciously or not, make sure to find and genuinely appreciate the things you’re doing, the way you work/think. 

If you’re the person who others appreciate the way you work/think/what you’re doing— make sure you aren’t tearing others down. This is a thing?? Whether you’re doing it unconsciously or if you start going  ‘maybe I can do this better than them, maybe I can grow/get more appreciated’ — don’t. It’s that kind of egoistical arrogance that’s going to hurt others/your friend. 

You’re not supporting, you’re using them. Even if you think you’re bubbling well on your own/minding your own business (there’s a time/place for that)– it’s still a community of people you’re influencing. 

Try to be socially responsible, it’s not that bad and it is something you’d rather be safe than sorry about y know (being well-informed socially and using that for the better?)💞

Learn how to appreciate and support, how to let people thrive. Learn how to ‘check’ yourself and stop acting out of your own fears/lashing out onto others as well. Most of the time it’s your own experience (or insecurities) that’s making you push others down like that. You’re going to lose more friends and opportunity if you keep doing it– so make sure to get some motivation, some support (if you need that), use your voice in the community well as well. 

Brings us back to the point earlier: treat others the way you treat yourself, if others treat you with appreciation and compliment – give the same energy back?? 💞 Learning astro also depends on the community too right? So how do you want to be treated within the community/how do you treat the community? 

It’s not just knowledge, it’s also self-growth. If we want to have self-love/care/help/growth, we gotta learn how to act harmoniously with others as well. Nothing ‘self’ related is ever truly done with just ourselves, it’s how we invest, how we treat others and how others treat us (keep trying even if you fall, keep trying. We got trump but we’re still trying, right? Stop giving up hope.)  

Learn how to navigate it, instead of trying to fight it (putting the self first or others first//imbalance) Act with consciousness, the more you’re aware of how you behave/react the more you can learn how to be emotionally intelligent and socially active as well 💞

Your best resources are the people around you as well, sometimes it’s not just books or what you read online. How people conduct, react, how they insert themselves into the narrative/your life will influence what you think about them and how they think about you. 

Try to realize that we are bias, because we’re essentially human. Even when we look at things ‘detached from the ego’/well-reasoned we’re still human. No matter how unbiased/knowledgeable we think/know we are, we can’t escape the inevitable nature of our species. So the most we can do is try to keep it together ok and try to be considerate/nice (learn to let others love you/love others, is sometimes harder than learning how to ‘love yourself’)💞

If you’re more of the traditional astrologer type (heavy learning and theory, history, really fun and exciting!) — people are appreciative of things, old or new, it never hurts to keep an open-mind about stuff 💞 

Some might not even realize it’s an option, and while people might be (everyone) ‘well thats our/their fault they should’ve researched’ – it’s good to consider that sometimes our modern day life doesn’t always open certain doors up to us all at the same time (we all learn different things at a different time/place in our lives) – so make room for yourself to be curious and to grow, don’t stay stagnant in what you already know and is trying to ‘perfect’ (bc perfection is always improved, more and more as we gain more time/age/perspective as well)💞  

Theres always room to grow, there’s always room to learn more. But realizing that you’re over-stepping boundaries and making other people uncomfortable with your interpretation is also a thing.It’s?? something we should consider 💞 

Just try to be considerate of others, and be aware of how much you insert/hold yourself back, how you conduct yourself and what your influence does to others as well 💞 Have people you talk to, who can lift you up and encourage you because you deserve it (make sure they’re ok with that too and try not to pile it onto one person ok?) 💞

Don’t stop trying 💞

Low-key that’s kinda like how we behave with politics? Either we ‘dont care either way’ (which is shit for the community/direction we’re going), cares only for the self/personal gain (cough *the 1%* cough), is well-informed and feels shitty about the situation we’re in right now (depressed, suffering, either protesting or lies in bed thinking about giving up) or is just… y know, HOPEFUL but also angry and wanting to be proud of our community and ourselves (prosper/thrive stuff like that) 💞💞

Try to be socially conscious, if you’re down/drained, look out for your happiness/your own health first (pls care for your own health/well-being) 💞 For me, finding a buddy or supportive mutual works. I can’t invest time into everybody but those who I have genuine connections with, I try to keep up as much as tumblr messaging app would tell me I have a notification (it doesn’t sometimes) 💞💞

Tips maybe more specific for beginners/intermediate?? 💞

(might be more relevant? But I’m not sure what type of beginner we are because there’s– a few? But this is the main bulk so maybe give this a read even if you’re not a beginner too) 

Premise: Everything below this is after the assumption that we allread up stuff, study about the subject, research things already and is starting somewhere/in the process of starting (already interested in astro) 

*I wasn’t thinking about complete COMPLETE beginner who mayhaps might’ve just discovered there’s things beyond the sun-sign (for those that are💞: im sorry ;; I think there’s a post for that too somewhere on my blog maybe skdjnk 💞)  

So for those who are beginner astro: Practice 💞Can’t emphasize this enough 💞 We might be self-conscious about our skills, but your biggest critic is yourself and your ego/mood (or lack of it)? 💞Just try practicing it 💞 

Theoretical knowledge might get you somewhere, but we also need to know how to apply them 💞 Try to figure out how to read/interpret as you go 💞Sometimes people are like ‘uh oh, red flag. You can’t just let any lunatics out there.’ So this is out of the assumptions that you’ve been a very very theory based person (read a lot of stuff) but haven’t got the time/energy/motivation to start yet. 

Balance comes from steady progress in both, so if you dove head deep into doing something. Do your research. If you did research, start working. This is a lab exercise and the more you waste time the more you don’t know how to time-manage yourself into doing both (theory and practical). 

We improve when we learn how we work/what we need to work on along the way, but making sure you have substance in both is good for you (so you don’t fuck up the lab exercise and waste your time) 💞

Test yourself and your knowledge? 💞 Find your niche, what you’re interested in 💞 What you might want to figure out or contribute with? 💞 Having a sense of purpose, or having a friend help you check you or hype you up (support you) really helps with motivation 💞 

Dont be afraid to ask for encouragement, don’t be too prideful or overthink it too much, we all need that especially when we’re starting out – it can be lonely on your own and even if you can handle it, try to not put that weight on yourself?💞 

Jus reach out for people who can give you the time/energy, and help support each other up 💞 It’s much better than being by yourself or feeling shitty about what you do alone. Can’t stress this enough, what’s the point of having a community if you’re going to use them for resources but feels so alienated/alone and like things are passing you by (not feeling knowledgeable enough/forgetting stuff because you don’t hold yourself accountable for applying/putting it out there somewhere so you can ‘practice’ it really) 

It also helps with retaining knowledge and intuition, realizing that the things we’re learning are not stagnant and neither should our learning interpretations/methods (we’re all learning as we go so don’t feel bad about contributing or look down on yourself/your knowledge ok?)💞 

You learn more if you follow the guides but use that as a jumping board, things are fluid but there are a few certain rules 💞 Don’t feel intimidated by them, find what interests you and research it because you want to (not because you need to in order to be have ‘complete/fair knowledge’ on the subject) 💞 

Figure out a way that’s uniquely you, that you can find purpose to and explain it in your own way 💞 We’re talking about the same thing, we’re just doing it in a different way/choosing different parts of the same topic to talk about with each other (sharing is caring, but remember to like..diary entry it out? Sometimes if you push something onto others it can be like uuuuuuh?? cause no one really interprets the same way as each other) 💞💞  

Remember that where-ever you are on the spectrum (beginner, intermediate, whatever) it’s not like– a ‘conclusive’ subject. It’s not like we can know all there is to know about something and that’s the be all end all in it. 

That’s why we practice as we go, because we always think: 

‘If I know a little bit more/feel more stable with my knowledge then I can start interpreting’ — there’s no ‘end’ to the knowledge, you keep learning as you go 💞

What matters is you sharpen yourself and narrow it down to what matters to you, that you yourself progress and grow as an astrologer/person 💞Try practicing as you go otherwise you’ll feel self-conscious about yourself/your own ability forever?? 💞💞💞 

Most of the time, we only know what we perceive/interpret 💞While we can look at others and be like ‘wow! fantastic’ at what they do, that doesn’t discredit how you interpret or what you want to talk about💞  

Share, contribute, we’re all talking about the same thing just different parts of it 💞Your voice matters, and what you bring to the table even if you think you’re repetitive or being redundant it matters 💞

No one is essentially the ‘boss’ of a subject 💞We’re so scared of criticism when we first begin, even constructive ones are feared too 💞 

Closing ourselves down emotionally or detaching the ego from your work doesn’t always help (esp in term of compassion/what you want to produce/contribute or help others with) – learning how to be your own cheerleader does (*be aware of your social influence, how you affect others and what you say as well tho!) 💞

Learning how to grow, have a support system, how to accept emotional hurt instead of deny it or glide past it helps 💞 ‘it aint that deep’ but it is personal and healing to some people, it can be an emotional thing 💞 

Don’t dismiss that, learn how to feel comfortable with what you do, check that the way you come across or the way you want the information to contribute is actually having an impact you want 💞

Think of it as growing, editing and manifesting yourself to be the best person? 💞 You’re essentially trying to discover you or have a voice 💞 Whether its in the community or on the subject, learning how you come across on the topic — receiving compliments, criticism– letting it help you and take what you need from it, 💞 Let it help you grow and experience things, discover and learn more about yourself as you do 💞

It’s more than just the subject right? 💞It’s the experience of learning and progressing with your knowledge/ability as well, what it takes to get comfortable/stable enough and to be efficient with it 💞

It’s figuring yourself out 💞 Like learning art, you figure out your own style what you want to do and you have different characteristics from each other 💞 It’s a constant learning progress 💞 So it’s not like, a completely different learning process than art (you can see your progress, no one stays the same when you practice– you’re not the same ‘artist’ or create the same ‘art style’ that you have when you started, with astrology it’s a similar thing– not completely the same but similar)

For beginners, knowing that you yourself is holding you back from doing stuff, starting stuff or criticizing yourself because you’re scared others going to criticize you (and beat down your confidence/happiness/ego) is something we’re going to have to tackle 💞Self-imposed fear, constant watching our back or just being afraid to share (procrastination/putting it off until later) is what’s stopping you the most. 💞 

Do something right now, post something. Even if it’s small. It’s a start and it makes a huge difference (what you envision for yourself, how you want to contribute/manifest, what kind of person you want to be– if you’re more of the type to think about your ‘purpose’ as well)

Getting into the habit of doing something because it feels like a relief, like you’re expressing your own knowledge. Like you have more voice or is just confidence in something. Helps. 💞

Even if no one sees it (which is probably what all beginners are praying for skdjn) even if someone yells at you (fear conjured by our own anxiety and wariness of the cancel culture??) you find your own footing and you know your own path. You figure out what you want to do from there because you know you and you know how to write stuff for yourself, alright? 💞

I think for complete beginners getting over this initial fear is hard, like the hardest thing because we might feel we’re essentially ‘putting ourselves out/up there for criticism’ – it’s easy to be cynical/closed-off, it’s harder to be confident/content with ourselves. Learning how to do this for you, to say it with your own voice. The astro community is vast, if your voice isn’t someone’s cuppa tea then they’ll leave? If they like your opinion/want to hear you clarify more, they’ll ask? 💞 

Treat others the way you want to be treated?? 💞 That’s the best advice I can give you if you don’t want to deal with what you fear?? How you talk about stuff, what you say and what kind of people you’re talking about matters. If you talk more shit than you actually give back, then you’re going to attract more shit to you as well? It’s in how we conduct ourselves and how we figure us out (*for how to help ourselves, sometimes shit happens and sometimes it’s hard to get over a past experience or let prejudice color our lens)   💞

We grow and learn, and sometimes we’re embarrassed by our past behaviors– so make sure you’re looking out for your future self as well 💞

Sometimes our fears and ‘ill do it later’ is bigger than our happiness and actual knowledge. You undermine yourself, and your own mind and paranoia is sometimes your biggest foe 💞 

Who’s the one who double checks everything they write? Who’s the one who doesn’t carelessly make up a post because they don’t like getting backlash? It’s you. You’re your biggest editor but also your biggest push back, learn how to be spontaneous and do things now 💞

Mmmm another thing that might be hard for beginners, but will help them a lot is ‘jumping off’ things (applying knowledge). People like interesting posts right? We like things that are beyond the basics, because we know the basics. That’s the guidelines, and sometimes we look back and see interesting posts there too! 💞

But the point is, you gotta learn how to find your own voice and make posts that personally interests you? 💞 Posts that makes you invested, that makes you feel personal. Posts that gets you to self-express your voice 💞 

Applying knowledge isn’t hard, you can do astro-notes for yourself and that’s a pretty efficient and productive start already? 💞 Finding your own methods or what kind of things you want to talk/post about helps too 💞 

Doing things for yourself generally helps alot because it’s there to add to your own voice, your own observation and knowledge in something beyond just theoretical. It’s also there to share and contribute with others 💞 The more you notice, the more you learn how to apply 💞

More and more, you learn how to grasps not working so point by point (I’m learning this and then I’ll go learn that) but how to weave them together and how they differentiate? 💞 That’s where you wanna be at right? Where you can talk about some astro philosophy and re-work how you think/interpretate/learn stuff and share that with others as well 💞

Anyways, those are just things that might help. To keep in mind? Just do stuff. Like do things. That’s how you find support and learn about yourself. You’re never not going to like ‘you’ when you start doing something (like going to a dance class for the first time, trying out something you like. You might be nervous/hyper-aware but you come out knowing where you stand with the idea of it continuing)– you’re going to look at yourself and want to edit more and more. So make sure you start, so you can actually do something with it too! 💞 

ALSO TO NOTE: Try not to be prejudice. This is an icky subject especially with serious traumas, victims who has their own mind-prison (*is in therapy or need it to help with past experiences) we’re all biased, we said that. For those who are in therapy (experiences that has happened in the past) – work on you, we’re here for you. Take your time, it’s good to even be aware of certain trigger points. Please take care of yourself first 💞

For those who are?? less serious?? honestly it’s jus a fun thing like you can joke but you can also be serious just– if you come to me I’m always gonna be like ‘hey its ok’ and?? jus?? talk about their traits and stuff?? 💞💞

That’s some?? Tips for beginners I think?? 💞💞 I hope it’s useful?? 💞💞💞

[ghoststrawberries]

im just out here making the hollow knight characters human and also slam dunking them into a bnha au for no reason other than so i can give them quirks dont mind me im bein self indulgent tonight n havn a good time thinking about this. this definitely isnt all the Hollow Knight characters, just a few, but i might add more to this post some other time!

---

the Knight, also known as Ghost - quirk: Void. they can manipulate shadows and a dark unknown energy to both attack and defend. their quirk most often manifests as tendrils that fan out from their body and whip at friend and foe alike. They have tiny antler-like horns, and their eyes appear to be wide, black, empty sockets, peering into a dark space in their head. They often wear a simple mask to cover their empty eyes. It is unknown if that black emptiness is a part of their quirk or not, but that plus the fact that they don’t ever speak and don’t often show emotion gives them the unsettling effect of seeming to be hollow.  People who know them well though know how expressive they can be. They’re in Gen Ed and no one can get an answer out of them as to why they didn’t want to be in the Hero course. 

Hornet - quirk: Silk. She can spin threads of silk from herself. it comes from her wrists and is extremely strong, strong enough for her to swing or pull herself along on it or use it as a weapon. She has a lot of extra tools that she’s built for herself to help her utilize her quirk better, like her Needle and some other deadly gadgets, that she attaches her Silk to in order to throw and wield them with lethal precision. The downside to her quirk is that she can’t create too much silk at once or else it exhausts her/gets “jammed” and she can’t use it for awhile. She’s in the Hero course, and her hero name is Weaver. She’s the older half-sister to the Knight but doesn’t share their odd hollow appearance, with her eyes and face being normal, but she does also have horns. hers are smooth and curved though. 

the Hollow Knight - quirkless? They’re the older sibling to Hornet and the Knight, but no one really ever sees them. People who have seen them though describe them as massive. a hulking form that, despite it’s size, seems to curve inwards on itself to try and make itself smaller. Rumor has it that they used to have a quirk, but something terrible happened that caused them to “lose their quirk” and isolate themselves in their home out of trauma. they hate and are triggered by bright lights and extremely sharp things, and only ever talk/interact with Ghost or Hornet. they have horns as well, theirs being the largest of the three of them, and like Ghost they have a hollow-like appearance to their eyes which is only emphasized by the odd crack that stretches from their left horn through their left “eye.” They don’t wear a mask to cover their eyes like Ghost does, they don’t even seem to really care...

the Pale King - quirk: idk how to name this but like. everyone in his vicinity gains a boost in intelligence, but also they find themselves drawn to him and easily manipulated by him. its like a field of influence he is able to exert over the people around him at all times that makes it easy for him to not so much mind control others but... suggest things to them. people follow him and stay around because they enjoy the boost in intelligence, without knowing that he’s stringing them along like puppets all the while. he was a “Hero” with a large kingdom-like domain over his own hero agency and the small city that surrounded it, praised for bringing peace to what was once a very crime ridden and tumultuous area, but he was doing some secret dark dealings in villain activity and illegal quirk sciences on the side. He disappears mysteriously one day and it is unknown whether he was killed or fled from the consequences of his actions.

Quirrel - quirk: Perfect Memory. he’s perfectly able to recall any fact or piece of information he’s ever learned/been told. especially useful as he’s the apprentice to the great scholar Monomon. Yet, after Monomon became involved in a deal with the Pale King, Quirrel found himself suffering from amnesia, and completely displaced from the city the Pale King “ruled” and where Monomon’s Archives were. For now, as he works to piece together what happened to his quirk and his memory, he is a substitute teacher who can substitute for both history classes and combat classes. He still has a mask with him, but is it Monomon’s? or someone else’s. After all, why would Monomon need a mask if she wasn’t a hero...

White Lady - quirk: a secret. The wife of the Pale King, she keeps the true nature of her quirk a secret after some terrible deed that she used her quirk to help with and now feels regret over. Many have speculated as to if it is connected to her tree-like appearance or not. Her hair and legs are pale and seem almost root-like, and it’s very hard for her to move around without a mobility aid like a wheelchair. She loves nature, and has her own personal gardens in the city that the Pale King “rules” that are almost always flourishing. Ever since the Pale King disappeared though, she hasn’t gone to her gardens, and has in fact locked herself away in the rooms that were hers in the giant house she and the Pale King lived in. Only her personal guard and best friend, Dryya, is trusted with her care. 

[transhawks]

Hawks of course! (Or Shiggy if you've already done him!)

oooh. Okay time to perhaps lose some followers?

HAWKS

I like: I like his dedication, his ability to see the thing needs to be done. I love how driven he is and yet he’s not driven by fame or prestige. He’s heroic but he doesn’t exactly enshrine the ideological naivety that many heroes seem to have. I like that despite all the fronts he presents, he seems to be a genuinely good person struggling with himself and his desire for freedom and to make his own choices.

I dislike: His inability to let others help, to slow down, his ‘do it myself’ nature. It does read as dismissal/ego to others, but it’s far more complex, borne of old wounds. He’s a perfectionist and I think this might be what might end him. Also, his inability to say no to a task when it comes to his life, to his freedom, his willingness to let himself be a sacrificial pawn (and for what? Why him is what I want to know? What allows a man to be okay with being used as such? What happened to him that his self-worth is in the hands of others?).

“A society where heroes have more free time than they know what to do with. I will make it a reality, as fast as I can.” - My favorite quote

Tokoyami&Hawks, Natsuo&Hawks, Mirko&Hawks, Fat Gum&Hawks are brOTPs, and I might ship him with Fat and Natsuo. 

DabiHawks, ShigaHawks has grown so fast on me, ShigaDabiHawks as an ultimate OT3

For NOtps, anything with the kids, even if they’re aged up to 18 because I’m currently an RA with a six year difference myself and that’s a huge gap in maturity and generally experience. I don’t care for En//awks (but I don’t wish to bother fans in the tag so)

Random Headcanon: Hawks has a nictitating membrane! That’s the thin membrane birds and reptiles have that protects their eyes, especially for birds during flight. I think his goggles are probably better protection but also shield people from noticing the fact his eyes just got covered by a semi-transparent film. I’m sure it’d be unnerving for a lot of people, a not so ‘cute’ mutation, and not work in favor of his image so he hides it.

I don’t think he’s anywhere near as sexually active as the Hawks standom seems to think he is due to his workload. My unpopular opinion is that he’s probably had several sexual experiences with mostly strangers, and probably never been in an actual relationship. but he sad and lonely thirsty tho. Also I don’t think he’s actual best buds with Miruko. I don’t think he’s allowed himself to have many friends tbh.

Domesticated Animals by Queens of the Stone Age is another song I associate with him.

favorite picture of them - I have too many! But here’s this one I made my background:

SHIGARAKI

I like the fact he has shown so much character development. I know there are people who seem to think that he hasn’t, or he’s very much being cunning for his members, but I strongly feel that Shigaraki is growing in emotional intelligence - I’m excited to see what sort of villain he’ll be by the end. I also do find the man-child thing hilarious and watching him throw tantrums is wonderful. Also the scratching thing - but I’ll get to that in Headcanons.

Yet I didn’t care for him when I got into the manga in May. I thought he was immature, lacking conviction and ideology (which he did and still somewhat does), and that annoyed me - not the type of villains I generally cared for. But he’s grown on me. I guess I dislike the perceived lack of self-reflection when it comes to his own upbringing (or what we can gather given AFO).

“I’m angry at this world that categorizes the same violent acts as heroic or villainous, deciding what’s good and what’s bad. “symbol of peace?” Ha. you’re just a device to repress violence. violence only breeds violence.” - My fave quote

brOTP - shigaraki x LoV!!!!!!

OTP - Shigadabihawks!! and the pairings that make it up : 3

nOTP - I feel like ShigaHaul would be a bit too much neurosis in one pairing lmfao, it’s not for me. Any ships with the kids or Toga. I think he’s in his late teens/20 but he clearly differentiates between himself and the children when he talks about them, so even if there’s a three or four year difference, I’m very ‘no’.

My head-canon is more an explanation of canon behavior: Shigaraki clearly has Dermatillomania, a type of Body-focused Repetitive Behavior. BFRBs are not exactly OCDs but appear like them and there’s no conclusive cause - I have several BFRBs and I’ve heard the theories go from genetic components/neurological disorders to links with PTSD and Anxiety and back to neurological reasons. Seems to be a mix of both, lol, and we’re given antideps for treatment. But yeah, his skin picking/scratching is named Dermatillomania and I wouldn’t be surprised if he made his face scarring worse with it. But it’s like the first time I’ve seen BFRBs in anime, so I find this cool!!!! (should I make this a separate post??)

Not sure if this is unpopular, but here’s an opinion:. While I don’t think he’s exactly the nerdy loser, no matter how much I want to joke about basement-dwelling, I do think he’s never had sex?? i have no opinion on him being a top or bottom, I just think the closest he’s gotten to any sex is 2-D and on the screen, so far.

Vicarious by Tool

Okay, every time Hori draws him in detail is magnificent. Hori should have been a horror mangaka. But also this:

[constablegoo]

alright so i have. a lot of questions and thoughts on changeling physiology

tldr it’s quite unorganized so; asexual reproduction, shifting is a natural instinct but can be expanded through study and discipline, Form is easier to reproduce than Function, changelings passively absorb energy via background radiation, conservation of mass... ha, energy efficiency, regeneration is an aware but subdued/vulnerable state, you can sneak up on odo but not most changelings, exaggerated and inhuman movement, language and body language learning, Viscosity tm, vital organs exist, injury and physical tolerance, focusing the senses...

asexual reproduction. loads of possibilities here. they might split in two (which could mean they’re really all clones of one another or else slight variations on an original) or lob a bit of themselves off which then begins to form a new individual. they might fragment off and start growing more individuals from themselves until they’re mature enough to carry on, or they might produce spores!!! OR they might reproduce the way coral do. the main complication is that this is meant for simple or single-celled organisms and also maybe leaves them all more vulnerable to that Clone Problem of being wiped out by a single virus. but perhaps their ability to mimic other types of dna is involved in providing new individuals with a robust enough mix of original genes to be baseline Adaptable

also a problem with simple organisms is that they propagate Extremely quickly and tend to be short-lived and. unintelligent (think fruit flies) so - changelings could have a fair few ‘simple organism’ traits but are ofc complex in reality

the mimicry -- do they actually become the material?? if you scan a changeling as a rock, they have the make up of a rock. but what about more complex materials? or systems? like fire? that requires energy input. im gonna go with: 1. depends on skill level 2. some things like fire they can mimic visually, maybe even with proper light and heat, but does take energy to do so.

speaking of which HOW do they get energy. i think i rambled about this a little in another post, but basically im going with the idea that they’re sort of filter feeders on the dust of the universe... they’re just VERY energy-efficient and collecting these little bits of radiation being thrown around space is a passive activity. i.e. odo probs wouldnt even know he does it, even though he does it constantly.

um. conservation of mass. the biggest thing ive seen odo turn into is that blob-monster, which was maybe 10′x10′ ? 15 at most? large, but probably somewhat unstable, and not huge. the smallest thing in canon is probably the mouse. ive seen the idea that humanoid-formed odo might be. hollow? there’s no need for him to actually form internal organs or any of that, its all surface-level, and besides. if we’re going with the idea that they can reproduce Form more than Function, they wouldnt actually work. he doesnt even eat anyway, so why waste that kinda energy?

that said!! there are probably some basic object functions they can reproduce. im gonna say that maybe your average changeling isnt going to be able to make a microwave that actually microwaves (not without a great deal of practice and scientific understanding), but could more easily become a lamp, for instance, that does actually turn on. that means they have some ability for bioluminescence, but again that requires energy and would shorten the time they can hold that shape.

regeneration obvs. is a chance to re-acquire energy, but we’re told odo doesnt sleep - it’s still a resting state, but maybe he’s still at least somewhat aware of his surroundings, if a bit unable to focus. he certainly seems to still undergo thought processes, etc. but if attacked in this state, he’ll be quite vulnerable, esp if he’s just reached hour 16, but he wont be completely defenseless. WAY more likely to hide than retaliate though, esp depending on where in the cycle he happens to be at the time -- even if that werent also kinda his personality. maybe its like bein rly rly rly tired but ur brain wont keep quiet.

kinda enjoy the idea of changelings becoming a little translucent or misshapen when they zone out. it takes some effort, practice, skill to remain present. a habit!

im sure he doesnt really bother to maintain constant humanoid-shape unless someone’s likely to look at him. could see him MAYBE being caught unawares, on occasion, whoops. very rarely, but how embarrassing

on that note, if you’re able to sneak up on odo and surprise him, he might momentarily jump a little out of shape (like a cartoon, exaggerated). other emotions like disgust or haughtiness might come off a little exaggerated too

at large, humanoid body language is a learned language for changelings, even if they can pick it up very quickly

odo’s got his humanoid walk cycle down pretty good but probably not perfectly, actually. i sort of imagine it could be a little more flowing -- not always -- but if he’s doing something he normally doesnt do, he moves a little less like a human bc he hasnt practiced it enough

ok whats the viscosity of changelings? like..... really runny and liquidy? j.... jelly? i kinda refer back to single-celled organisms again. cytoplasm w control.

in fact odo probably has some very simple (or maybe very complex, considering, but able to disguise themselves accordingly. so simple-appearing?) organs going on in there as well as cytoplasm of some sort

they dont sweat, they dont bleed, they dont smell, they dont taste, they dont sleep

they DO see, hear, are tactile, and feel most emotions that humans do. some of that emotions stuff is cultural

losing a little tiny bit of themselves (injury, i.e., a bit chopped off by a weapon) probs doesnt really hurt much more than getting a scrape, but if u like chop em in half thats gonna be Bad. but most surface level damage is just like getting a haircut or something, no pain. re: that scene with odo stopping the turbolift like.... that could’ve been painful

FOCUS!! sight, sound, etc - im writing senses as things that dont necessarily need to be located in the. face. bc they dont. but im thinking odo tends to concentrate it of course to better interact with others. that means technically - he could. .. . ‘accumulate light sensors’ and see out the back of his head, for instance, even without forming eyes, but because odo’s odo and he’s really trying to fit in he usually wont do that sort of thing and you can still sneak up on him. sometimes he even forgets he can do that kind of thing, when he’s humanoid-formed (unless he’s startled -- then he might revert to more ‘natural’ reactions) - bc he really hasnt spent any time with his people at all

this doesnt even get into the Great Link and changelings being a little bit touch-psychic

another thought !! i like the idea of one limitation being that he has to have seen / experienced in-person / studied / encountered / been exposed to an object, person, or animal to really become it. that’s where skill comes in -- some things are going to come very naturally, like shapes that are common in the universe such as rocks or. plants, in star trek .  they can learn by description or by looking at images and making their best guess, but its not gonna be totally accurate. so - some shapes come from study, like humanoids, and others come more by instinct like rocks and dirt and water, like learning to talk.

so when did odo meet a klingon targ omg

also means they are instinctually EXCELLENT observers, both of material and behavior

but imagine a bird or smth speaking in odos voice yikes

speaking of speaking, odo speaks bajoran and doesnt really know any other languages on his own, except workable cardassian. i.e. he’d have to learn to speak seagull

what if bc odo’s learning and sort of stunted in skill bc of his upbringing and inhibitions his face is..... actually made of latex, sometimes, like when he needs to save energy he goes Low Poly Rendering cos its close enough, and easier, and he’s interacted with plenty of latex and other Made materials bc he’s hardly lived at all anywhere that wasnt built-up by life forms. (probs partly why he seems so interested in practicing other animals and plants -- natural shapes are not shapes he’s been as exposed to, so they’re more interesting - and dynamic - than say, furniture / appliances)

he gives off no body heat, but neither is he cold. room temp, with a wide tolerance

can survive in space and vacuums

they seem somewhat naturally stronger than humans, esp as a sturdy material

some of them can become a magnet, thats just aligning poles / can then reproduce some basic electronics functions

at least they seem to have pretty comparable intelligence to humans so that’s relatable

[patriotsnet]

Why Do Republicans Stand With Trump

New Post has been published on https://www.patriotsnet.com/why-do-republicans-stand-with-trump/

Why Do Republicans Stand With Trump

Beneath The Hood Of Trump’s Support Base

Why Are Republicans Still So Afraid Of Trump? | The 11th Hour | MSNBC

Trump’s victory in 2016 came on the back of a surge in voter turnout among white Americans without a college degree, a group he won by better than a 2-1 margin over Democrat Hillary Clinton. Trump won 6.5 million more voters over the age of 45, despite losing the national popular vote by almost three million.

But that “demographic blowback” which saw some older Americans cast a vote for the first time since Ronald Reagan was on the ballot, was never a long-term strategy they are literally dying off.

But they aren’t dead yet, and neither is Trump’s support base.

AP: Julio Cortez

A CNBC poll last week found 89 per cent of voters without a college degree and 74 per cent of Republicans want Trump to stay active in politics in some way. Almost half of Republicans want Trump to remain head of their party, while 11 per cent want him to break away and start his own party. It’s that final figure that probably worries Republicans more than any other.

Trump has already flirted with the idea of starting his own “Patriot Party” to rival both Republicans and Democrats, and provide a vehicle for a potential third presidential campaign in 2024.

The only time a former president tried to return to office under the banner of a new party, Theodore Roosevelt in 1912, he consigned his former Republican Party to a distant third place.

Republican Voters Arent Clamoring For Changes

It might seem odd that were only now turning our attention to Republican voters, who may seem like the most important factor in keeping the party from shifting gears. Im not so sure. We have a lot of evidence that voters tend to follow the cues of political elites . In other words, I suspect that if GOP elites, from national elected leaders to Fox News to local activists, had collectively broken with Trump and Trumpism after the Capitol riot, the percentage of rank-and-file Republican voters ready for the party to go in a new direction would have grown.;

Party elites arent completely unresponsive to popular will, of course. If, for some reason, a majority of Republican voters were positively clamoring for a new direction, perhaps elites would respond. But thats not happening. Instead, polls suggest rank-and-file Republican voters seem fairly averse to major changes to the GOP, particularly a real repudiation of Trump.

Opinionrep Justin Amash’s Brave Decision To Leave The Gop Just The Tip Of The Iceberg

So who will stand up now and help take the Republican Party in a new direction? Election season cannot go into perpetuity, at some point we must govern. Someone must lead.

I am not naive, nor do I believe that the majority of our political leaders have the intelligence or moral compass to act with the courage of Abraham Lincoln. Expecting an overnight solution to a longterm problem is a recipe for failure. And I realize that the same people who mocked me for believing that Republicans and Democrats could work together before, will likely mock me once again for believing that all hope is not lost.

I realize that the same people who mocked me for believing that Republicans and Democrats could work together before, will likely mock me once again for believing that all hope is not lost.

But what other choice do we have? Our democracy requires compromise and courage to meet the challenges that we face. We cannot afford to continue down the broken roads that have led us to gridlock. We need each other.

Like it or not, Democrats need a strong Republican Party to act a a counterweight in our deliberative process. The Framers fully intended for progress to be incremental, not overnight or all at once. A democracy absent diversity is not a democracy. This symbiotic relationship may not be pretty and certainly may not always be successful, but it is necessary to the framework that makes us a shining star on a hill.

Recommended Reading: How Many Registered Democrats And Republicans Are There

Trump Is Still A Force In The Party

After the 2012 elections, prominent Republicans sharply criticized Mitt Romney and his campaign. Democrats did the same to Hillary Clinton after 2016 and sometimes included former President Barack Obama in their criticisms, too. For a political party to change direction, it nearly always has to distance itself from past leaders.;

Or put another way: For there to be an autopsy, there has to be a dead body.

They’ll Stand By Their Man Even When Doing So Is Bad For Democracy

Former President Trump will once again make the kind of history you do not want your name associated with on Tuesday when his second impeachment trial commences in the U.S. Senate. As with Trump’s first trial , the outcome is not in doubt. But just because we know how it will end doesn’t mean the trial won’t be gripping. Members of Congress narrating their terrifying Insurrection Day ordeals will be a riveting spectacle. And just as we did in the House last month, Americans will get a quick and dirty head count of how many Republicans value democracy itself more than their own political fates.

Don’t get your hopes up on that score. While the political and evidentiary cases for GOP senators to convict Trump and bar him from ever holding federal office again are straightforward, the path to 67 votes is not. Instead, viewers should brace themselves for torturous arguments about how it is unconstitutional to impeach a former president, and some extremely “It depends on what the meaning of ‘is’ is” galaxy logic about how Trump did not incite the crowd to insurrection because he did not literally say the words “please go and lay violent siege to our national legislature.” Gathering more than one Republican in a room these days is a plain invitation to this kind of sophistry.

That they still refuse to do so says more about them than it does about Trump.

Read Also: How Many States Are Controlled By Republicans

Why The Gop Congress Will Stop Trump From Going Too Far

The coming resistance from Republican lawmakers who hate Trump, fear executive overreachor both.

This is a sneak preview;of the upcoming January/February 2017 issue of the Washington Monthly.

Could it happen here? Could a democratically elected leader come to rule us as an autocrat? Citizens of a free society can never lose sight of this question, andhowever complacent many of us have becomethe election of Donald Trump has shoved it back out to center stage.

A dependence on the people is, no doubt, the primary control on the government, James Madison observed in The Federalist Papers, but experience has taught mankind the necessity of auxiliary precautions. These precautions are the separation of powers and checks and balances, enshrined in the Constitution. Citizens concerned about tyranny from the leaders they have elected must depend on the other branches of government to defend the republic.

In particular, the public must rely on Congress, the branch of government that Madison felt necessarily predominates, given its proximity to the people. Moreover, Article I of the Constitution vests in Congress all legislative Powers herein granted, as well as ample implied powers of oversight, and the power of impeachment should that become necessary. If a strongman government ever takes root in America, it will not be simply because we elected a president determined to establish it, but because Congress acquiesced in his designs.

Support Nonprofit Journalism

Opinion: If Republicans Dont Stand By Trump They Risk Losing Their Base Forever

The Republican Party risks exile for longer than it has endured in the modern era if, in the absence of incontrovertible evidence of actual high crimes and misdemeanors, it deserts President Trump during the campaign to remove him from office. Democrats are pursuing impeachment because they obviously fear that they cannot defeat him at the ballot box in 2020.

The advantage of talking with radio listeners and not merely lecturing readers or tweeting at followers or opponents is that you hear from people who arent among the Manhattan-D.C. media elites who overwhelmingly hate Trump. Cautioning that crowd against confirmation bias is as useless as it was to warn the Obama administration that the nascent Islamic State was not the terrorist . Awkward truths dont do well on the left. But here are some awkward truths:

First, no quid pro quo, much less an illegitimate one, has been proved about Trumps dealings with Ukraine.

Second, quid pro quos have always been a feature of U.S. foreign policy from the long-ago Louisiana Purchase to more recently President Barack Obamas sending the Iranian regime $1.7 billion in cash, which was central to the controversial U.S.-Iran nuclear deal. Quid pro quos are sometimes excellent and obvious, sometimes controversial, sometimes illegal.

That wont fly with half of the country. And that half is watching very closely.

Read more:

Don’t Miss: What Is Difference Between Democrats And Republicans

Why Donald Trump Is Republicans’ Worst Nightmare In 2024

Analysis by Chris Cillizza, CNN Editor-at-large

Earlier this week, amid a rambling attack on the validity of the 2020 election, former President Donald Trump said this: “Interesting that today a poll came out indicating I’m far in the lead for the Republican Presidential Primary and the General Election in 2024.”

“Trump is confiding in allies that he intends to run again in 2024 with one contingency: that he still has a good bill of health, according to two sources close to the former president. That means Trump is going to hang over the Republican Party despite its attempts to rebrand during his exile and its blockade of a Trump-centric investigation into January’s insurrection.”“Manhattan prosecutors pursuing a criminal case against former President Donald Trump, his company and its executives have told at least one witness to prepare for grand jury testimony, according to a person familiar with the matter — a signal that the lengthy investigation is moving into an advanced stage.”

House Republicans Meet With Trump To Discuss Overturning Election Results

Gravitas: US Election: Why Trump cancelled the Republican convention

Trump loyalists are planning a last stand Jan. 6.

Rep. Jody Hice tweeted after the meeting: “The courts refuse to hear the President’s legal case. We’re going to make sure the People can!

12/21/2020 10:10 PM EST

Link Copied

President Donald Trump huddled with a group of congressional Republicans at the White House on Monday, where they strategized over a last-ditch effort to overturn the election results next month, according to several members who attended the meeting.

Rep. Mo Brooks who is spearheading the long-shot push to overturn the election results in Congress organized the trio of White House meetings, which lasted over three hours and included roughly a dozen lawmakers. The group also met with Vice President Mike Pence, who will be presiding over the joint session of Congress when lawmakers officially certify the Electoral College votes on Jan. 6, as well as members of Trumps legal team.

It was a back-and-forth concerning the planning and strategy for January the 6th, Brooks said in a phone interview.

In addition to the dozens of House Republicans who are committed to objecting to the election results, Brooks said there are multiple Senate Republicans who are now receptive to the effort, though he declined to name names. Sen.-elect Tommy Tuberville , whom Trump has repeatedly praised on Twitter recently, has said he is considering the idea.

Sen. John Thune , however, told reporters Monday that the House GOPs effort is going down like a shot dog.

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Opinionwe Want To Hear What You Think Please Submit A Letter To The Editor

I have often been called too optimistic and criticized for my faith in my fellow American. Yet I wear those labels with pride, because at the end of the day we have to believe. We have to believe that we are part of something worth fighting for and saving.

Most importantly though, we have to believe in the goodness of each other and our ability to correct course even when it seems impossible. That has been our saving grace throughout history, our ability to turn this social experiment around and live up to our motto out of many, one.

Michael Starr Hopkins is the founding partner of Northern Starr Strategies and served on the presidential campaigns of Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton.

Republicans’ Choice: Stand With Trump Or Risk His Wrath

Trump has already informed at least two GOP lawmakers of his dissatisfaction with their defense of his racist tweets.

Sen. John Cornyn prides himself on winning a large share of the Latino vote in Texas, campaigning in the Asian American community and running ads in three languages. Its a crucial strategy for a Republican in a diverse state and one that is sharply divergent from President Donald Trumps approach.

So as Cornyn seeks reelection next year with Trump on the ballot, hes making sure that he isnt dragged down by the presidents more inflammatory politics, exemplified again this week by his racist tweets telling four liberal Democratic congresswomen to go back to where they came from.

I dont have any trouble speaking to any of my constituents. They dont confuse me with whats happening up here in D.C., said Cornyn, who has gently criticized Trumps battle as a mistake that unified Democrats. I know we are consumed by this here, but it doesnt consume my constituents when I go back home.

Its a common refrain for Republicans trying to deflect a Trump-fueled firestorm and highlights the dilemma that the party will face for months to come.

GOP lawmakers, especially those facing potentially tough reelection bids, need to create independent identities to win over Trump skeptics. But if they break too fiercely with the president, he and his grassroots supporters might turn on them, with disastrous political consequences.

Also Check: What National Policies Did Republicans Pursue During The Civil War

Why So Many Republicans Cling To Trump

Ben Shapiro got part of it right. A toxic mix of status anxiety, persecution fears, and echoes of the Civil War helps explain why they follow Trump into the abyss.

On September 17, 1862, over 10,000 Confederate soldiers were killed, wounded, or went missing in a single day at the Battle of Antietam. Very few of them came from slave-owning families, so why did they agree to give their lives in defense of human bondage?

I was reminded of this question when I noticed that Politico Playbook had recruited conservative celebrity and author Ben Shapiro;to explain why the vast majority of House Republicans voted not to impeach President Trump on Wednesday for sending a murderous mob after them on January 6. Politico was slammed by liberals for opening its best-known section to a conservative whos been charged with being bigoted and intolerant. But Shapiros explanation of the rallying around Trump during his final days wasnt totally off base. He was on to something about how Republicans see the world.

With Trump leaving office within a week, defending his incitement of an insurrection doesnt seem to be in the long-term self-interest of Republican officeholders.;But the Civil War example helps explain why people sometimes do very self-destructive things out of spite or insecurity.

White supremacy was such a consensus view at the time that Lincoln felt compelled to defend it.

Like the rebels at Antietam, no one wants to die for nothing.

Support Nonprofit Journalism

Where Texas Republicans Stand On Donald Trump

The surfacing of a 2005 clip showing Donald Trump speaking lewdly about women has caused many Republicans to drop their support for their party’s presidential nominee. Here’s how the controversy is unfolding in Texas.

Editor’s note: This story has been updated with additional comments. It was last updated Oct. 13.

The surfacing of a 2005 clip showing Donald Trump speaking lewdly about women has caused many Republicans across the country to drop their support for their party’s presidential nominee. Here’s how the controversy is unfolding among Texas Republicans in Congress and in statewide office:

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Critical Of Trump And Still Not Supporting Him

Texas House Speaker Joe Straus

Has he previously supported Trump?;No. Straus has never offered support for Trump, often saying he is instead focused on down-ballot races as the chairman of the Republican Legislative Campaign Committee.;

Where does he stand now?;Straus said in a statement Oct. 10: “I’ve had serious concerns about the nominee throughout this entire process. My focus remains on supporting Republican legislative candidates in Texas and across the country.”;

What We All Forget About The Political Career Of Bush 41

Clinton-Gore could compete

Bush’s term in office featured a short and highly successful war in the Persian Gulf and a budget deal with Democrats that would eventually reduce the federal deficit and slow the growth of the national debt. But a brief recession cost him in the polls, and a rebellion broke out on the party’s right.

Bush got a primary challenge from Pat Buchanan, a media personality who served as an adviser to Reagan and Nixon. Buchanan assailed the budget deal because it raised taxes. He conjured the spirits of Reagan and Goldwater and questioned Bush’s conservative bona fides. So did Ross Perot, an eccentric billionaire Texan who was running as a self-financing independent.

On top of that, Bush was confronted with the Democrats’ choice of an all-Southern ticket in Clinton of Arkansas and Al Gore of Tennessee. The young Democrats who could talk Southern carried their home states plus Louisiana and Georgia and all the Civil War “border states” . The region was back in play.

Clinton and Gore threw a chill into Republicans. What if Clinton served two terms and gave way to a still-vital, still-Southern Gore who could serve two more? That would be a roadblock in the White House equivalent to Roosevelt’s four wins.

Read Also: How Did President Clinton’s Impeachment Affect Republicans

[nerdytranswoman]

NSFW ask! those questions......... alllll of them.

1. Are looks important in a relationship?

Not sure. I tend to follow my gut when i meet people, so maybe there's some subconscious thoughts? But Personally, I’d say not, since I actively seek out thoughts on looks in order to change them by thinking “what if that was you?”. 

2. Are relationships ever worth it?

Yes. Yes they are. I feel so good when I click with a group of people, but when I find that one I can spend 100% of my time/energy with, they are all i need.

3. Are you a virgin?

haha, whats that?

4. Are you in a relationship?

Not in any I like, thats for sure. (samy, shut up. you got your family/live under the same roof, i want mine.)

5. Are you in love?

yes.

6. Are you single this year?

yeah. ish. 

7. Can you commit to one person?

I can, and I have before. 

8. Describe your crush

Smart, funny, nerdy, loves to talk with me, but even the silence in eachothers company was amazing, seeing the stars/moon reminds me of her every night. 9. Describe your perfect mate

^up there.

10. Do you believe in love at first sight?

mmm, yes? people are people, and sometimes they just... click!

11. Do you ever want to get married?

Yes, but not for government benefits. For Love. 

12. Do you forgive betrayal?

No, not without a VERY good explanation with proof. 

13. Do you get jealous easily?

Yes. bitch, I know I ordered the salad, but I’d cheat on it with your burger anyday.

other than that, no.

14. Do you have a crush on anyone?

Yes.

15. Do you have any piercings?

Yes. Yes I do. ;p

16. Do you have any tattoos?

yes. 27 if you count individual letters separately.

17. Do you like kissing in public?

If it’s someone I love, then the world can fuck off as I make out with them in the middle of the mall.

20. Do you shower every day?

I try to, but water conservation/depression sometimes get in the way.

21. Do you think someone has feelings for you?

Yup. I’m cute as heck, so unless you’re Ace, I assume you have feelings for me. 

22. Do you think someone is thinking about you right now?

Probably. Do parents ever not think about their kid?

23. Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months and not cheat?

Easily.

24. Do you think you’ll be married in 5 years?

Well, I was engaged last year, so who knows! Maybe!

25. Do you want to be in a relationship this year?

Yes, of course. I’m sick of my heart breaking tho.

26. Has anyone told you they don’t want to ever lose you?

Yes. I didn't think it would be that bad till I lost them.

27. Has someone ever written a song or poem for you?

mmm, nope.

28. Have you ever been cheated on?

Kinda? I’ve been lied to in the middle of a break with an understanding we would use the break to improve our relationship.

29. Have you ever cheated on someone?

Never.

30. Have you ever considered plastic surgery? If so, what would you change about your body?

Yup. Besides the standard surgery, I want to modify my body with augmentable mechanical limbs!31. Have you ever cried over a guy/girl?

Every day.

32. Have you ever experienced unrequited love?

Yes.

33. Have you ever had sex with a man?

Yup. Hated it.

34. Have you ever had sex with a woman?

Yup. Loved all of them. wait, no scratch that, still love them all even if our lives are going in two different directions now.

35. Have you ever kissed someone older than you?

Yes. Yes I have. 

36. Have you ever liked one of your best friends?

Liked? LIKED??!?! I love her. RIP, Alex. I miss you.

37. Have you ever liked someone who your friends hated?

Yup. first gf. she was manipulative and my friends told me, but I wouldn't listen.

38. Have you ever liked someone you didn’t expect to?

Yes. First time I met them I was scared shitless, but now I’m pretty sure that person would fight for me if someone was a big enough of a dick to me. 

39. Have you ever wanted someone you couldn’t have?

Yes, everyday for two years now. 

40. Have you ever written a song or poem for someone?

haha, yes! but none of you’ll ever hear it!

41. Have you had sex so far this year?Yes, though not as much as my newfound horniness would like me to be having. 

42. How long can you just kiss until your hands start to wander?

Umm, depends? Sometimes kissing doesn't start till after the wandering?

43. How long was your longest relationship?

3 years.

44. How many boyfriends/girlfriends have you had?

Umm, I’ve dated a lot, but in terms of actual relationships? 5. 

45. How many people did you kiss in 2012/2013?

Nobody. That’s when I was coming out of the closet to myself. 

46. How many times did you have sex last year?

I had a partner then, so...

47. How old are you?

Im currently a Quarter of a century old. How about that?

48. If the person you like says they like someone else, what would you say?

“Awesome! go get that skan... Skilled tuba player, im assuming.” 

49. If you have a boyfriend/girlfriend, what is your favorite thing about him/her?

Currently not applicable. But I do like the intelligence and depth of conversation I’ve had with partners. 

50. If your first true love knocked on your door with apology and presents, would you accept?

No. That ship has sailed.

51. Is there a boy/girl who you would do absolutely everything for?

Yes. 

52. Is there anyone you’ve given up on? Why?

A girl named Glenni. She told me she was Ace, but I will admit it took a little longer than that to stop pining for her. 53. Is there someone mad because you’re dating/talking to the person you are?

A few people don’t like my on-again/off-again/complex relationship with a gal in Monterey.

54. Is there someone you will never forget?

Alex.

55. Share a relationship story.

Watching the sunset on the beach slowly turn into a hamburger because of the clouds. We also had a picnic and I made vegan cheese for her sandwich! Idk what happened, but sadly we are no longer together.

56. State 8 facts about your body

Soft, Squishy, blonde leg/arm hair that makes me look shaved even after 8 months, a scar on my nose, a scar on my arm, crazy strength, shit stamina, gets wet at the beach.

57. Things you want to say to an ex

Fuck you for messing me up so badly that when I met the next person to make me feel even happier, I chickened out out of fear I’d lose them. 

58. What are five ways to win your heart?

Food, Conversational compatibility, cuddles, Adventures, ability to enjoy eachothers company in silence.59. What do you look like? (Post a picture!)

Here

60. What is the biggest age difference between you and any of your partners?

7 years. that's the extreme I’m willing to date.

61. What is the first thing you notice in someone?

Eyes, usually. Not color or shape, but how they express themselves, if that makes sense.

62. What is the sexiest thing someone could ever do for/to you?

I’d say something special that shows me how much they care for me. 

63. What is your definition of “having sex”?

Um, pretty much whatever you do with you and your partners genitals i guess?

64. What is your definition of cheating?

Seeing someone else in a relationship/sexual capacity without my knowledge. 

65. What is your favourite foreplay routine?

Teasing, followed by light touching.

66. What is your favourite roleplay?

BDSM, Brat vs Dom. I’ll let you guess what role I like to play. ;p

67. What is your idea of the perfect date?

Lots of cuddling, movies, and food all at home followed by sexytimes maybe?

68. What is your sexual orientation?

Gay. women are just so hot. 

69. What turns you off?

Lots of things. but being mean is pretty high up there. 

70. What turns you on?

Cheezy romantic crap directed at me.

71. What was your kinkiest wet dream?

Giving my partner complete (consensual and trusting with a safeword) control for them to do whatever they want with me. 

72. What words do you like to hear during sex?

... 

”Good girl.” 

>.

73. What’s something sweet you’d like someone to do for you?

Take me out for fancy food.

74. What’s the most superficial characteristic you look for?

Weight. I dont like too skinny or too heavy, but someone with a healthy looking amount of chub I can become immediately attracted to. 

75. What’s the sweetest thing anyone’s ever done for you?

Flew out to visit me. We shared one kiss. 

76. What’s the sweetest thing you’ve ever done for someone?

Idk, I like to think im pretty sweet to most people in general, but I don't know what the sweetest thing I’ve done for someone is. 

77. What’s your opinion on age differences in relationships?

if you’re not in your teens, don't date a teen. Otherwise, keep it within a decade to minimize incompatibility brought about by slight differences in culture growing up, especially in this technological age where it seems every six months there’s a new generation influencing the world. My limit is 7 years.

78. What’s your dirtiest secret?

Ever sucked a girls dick on a beach under a new moon? I have. 

79. When was the last time you felt jealous? Why?

A few days ago. She’s just better than me in every way it seems. 

80. When was the last time you told someone you loved them?

yesterday?

81. Who are five people you find attractive?

Me, samy, rain, glenni, alex

82. Who is the last person you hugged?

um, my therapist. A new one that i can very easily open up too, and apparently the feelings I’ve shared with her made her want to hug me at the end of our session. 

83. Who was your first kiss with?

NOBODY. thats who. 

she ded 2 me.

84. Why did your last relationship fail?

I have no clue. I thought things were going well, but then she told me she wanted to end things romanticly. I accepted, because why not? I don't want to force someone to be with me that doesn't want to. But I do worry it was something i said, something I did. 

85. Would you ever date someone off of the Internet?

haha, how do you think i find gf’s?

[soynairobi]

“¡Every thing is alright!”

It’s been so so long that I dont write here, and recently i checked my last posts and read them and I enjoyed it a lot, and it made me think a bit of me again. 

I feel a 8-9/10 bad.

Im now in Berlin, in a cold cold balcony. I could be inside the apartment instead of in the cold balcony but i dont feel like i can do just like if nothing happens anymore. I can't just sit there in the couch while i see Tobi working or/and watching random girls, and im just there next to him like if supporting him. I can't go back to sleep and hug and cuddle him till fall asleep after feeling betrayed, I cant go back to cuddles that easy anymore. Cuddles lose the healing power it has when the problem that has to be healed is always the same one and it comes always the same way. 

I appreciate the love that Tobi and me have. I believe we're very blessed for finding each other. I admire Tobi's humour and cleverness, and intelligence and sensibilidad. I remember reading his letter saying that there's no better joy for him than seeing me happy and smily. And I certainly feel very nice and warm in my bauch and its nice. It just came to my mind now what Julia (psycologist) said, that your partner can't make you feel good or better, but is yourself... lets take that in consideration again. He makes me feel good but is not either his duty and I shouldn't allow that he has that power, at the end he is another person and he is not my brain. So i have to make me feel good myself. 

But I think, why am I dealing with this situation... was it me and my mind being mean and mad at me? or was it really something that Tobi did and that is justificable for me to feel that way... 

That is still uncertain to me. The common logic and Tobis logic says that im not entitled to feel this way and to ask for what im asking... tho I dont think the real queastion has been answered in an honestly way, I just dont feel entitled to ask for what I really want... and that is that I dont want to deal with my partner being interested and actively looking for other girls either on the internet or real life... I dont want to know my partner and know that he/she is just that way and that im either taking something of their personality away or im being a bitch for bringing it up. But I really just want my partner to be easy with his needs of looking for other women. And i ask myself if is it a legit thing for me to ask for, or if it exists, or if im being totally unsense. 

What is it. Peace will come to me. 

Yeah certainly im feeling more in peace right now. Still confused tho about what are my rights to ask for and what are absolutely not okay to ask. 

I understand that Tobi has the desire/need of looking at other ass or boobs or body or face. I do understand it. I feel bad for having this feelings. I feel bad for being in a bad mood when it happens, and i feel bad for making him feel bad. Maybe im just being too selfish. Maybe this is not the way i should or the way i want to love. I actually would love to love in a very not asking for anything else and just being happy with what i got and what we have (Which is a lot!! and its really nice!” most of the times) and maybe some day i can reach that. Actually lately i was feeling very acceptable and not playing games in my mind, and i to make it easier and better for us by me just accepting how that things are right now...  im really trying to be chilled and relaxed and balance and easy... and it was working... so maybe i just gotta be more patient and it will come. It will just com this mindset of relaxing and not forcing anything or anyone. I know im trying and god knows im trying (lolololol god, but ja, just to say), all i want is to be in peace in my mind. 

I think about the unfairness. About the consequenses that there is if i would do what i think is fair when tobi does watch porn or looks for random girls on the internet, because he does, he says he doesnt do it like actively but what about what i see he does? because i do see, i do watch him when is happening hoping that it will be the way he says and he just scrolls down and not clicking on the girl that seems to be showing more. But thats not what i see, what i see is his attention going always, always either in the outside or on the internet, always going his eyes to the most naked or more cute one. What about that? im i creating those images? yesterday i saw him scrolling down very fast and the very quick saw a bikini girl and he went up to look at it because he missed it by scrolling too fast. Or i saw him looking at this instagram girl and clicking on the promising hot pictures and then googling her. And then this video of the girls ass, when he was looking at his other screen doing work or writing or somethings and everytime the girl would show ass again he would look at it until the ass is gone and go back to writing or working on the other screen, again and again. What about that? if im really crazy and what im seeing is not real? 

I wish i could just look away when he wants/needs to look at other girls.

And in any case, what does that even matter. It doesnt, it doenst matter if he looks watches or stares, as long as im the one he wants, right? 

That would be so nice to fully believe it. And im looking forward to have that mindset. To just be like, what does that even fucking matter. Right now it does matter to me and it means something to me. But i know it will stop some day, im just working harder to make it happen faster. 

i feel now in a 4/10 better/good. Good that either the writing, or the wind, or the music or the distance helped. }

“Everything is alright” from Living life. Kathy McCarty “Peace” Depeche mode.

[mytaggss]

4.2.17

1. Are looks important in a relationship?

yes i think they are important, but they are definitely not everything or the most important. 

2. Are relationships ever worth it?

yes i think they are if you are in love and being respected

3. Are you a virgin?

No

4. Are you in a relationship?

No

5. Are you in love?

No

6. Are you single this year?

Yes so far

7. Can you commit to one person?

Yes

8. Describe your crush

haha, i technically don’t have one

9. Describe your perfect mate

the perfect mate? well then, tbh i have no preference on race so i am going to leave that blank and leave it open because i am attracted to all races i have found as long as they have the attributes below lol. They have to physcially fit, i really like big muscles, but being fit will work just fine, having muscle definition is important. i like broad shoulders and chest. their face has to be somewhat attractive, i have put less importance on the face over time because its not super important anymore but i can’t be grossed out lol but that is rare. they have to be taller then me. i do like thick wavy hair that i can grab, but tbh hair doesn’t really matter when it comes down to it. they have to be somewhat intelligent. educated. nice/sweet when even if its just when they want to be, i like guys that are sweet to me at least ha. funny, they have to make me laugh. have goals and aspirations. and like them to be handy, like a fix it kind of guy, thats really attractive to me for some reason. (now this is a long list, but i make accomidations to almost everything except the for the height thing, i literally can’t, and they have to be physically fit/athletic/active, and all the personalty things are really important, but aren’t that difficult to find tbh)

10. Do you believe in love at first sight?

Nah

11. Do you ever want to get married?

Yes.

12. Do you forgive betrayal?

hmmmm, it depends, but usually no. 

13. Do you get jealous easily?

mmm, it depends, usually no but

14. Do you have a crush on anyone?

not technically

15. Do you have any piercings?

three on each ear

16. Do you have any tattoos?

No.

17. Do you like kissing in public?

haha i mean little bit

20. Do you shower every day?

yes twice a day, but one of them is just a rinse off

21. Do you think someone has feelings for you?

yes i know one person kind of does, or i know they think i am cute and stuff. but maybe other people do idk. 

22. Do you think someone is thinking about you right now?

hmm, nah. 

23. Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months and not cheat?

yes

24. Do you think you’ll be married in 5 years?

i think it is definitely possible 

25. Do you want to be in a relationship this year?

yes i do at some point this year, i am getting older so... idk but at the same time i might want to have some fun my sophomore year... idk

26. Has anyone told you they don’t want to ever lose you?

i dont think so

27. Has someone ever written a song or poem for you?

no

28. Have you ever been cheated on?

no

29. Have you ever cheated on someone?

No.

30. Have you ever considered plastic surgery? If so, what would you change about your body?

nahh

31. Have you ever cried over a guy/girl?

haha nah, well maybe a little but my pms is literally insane when it comes to my emotion and mood

32. Have you ever experienced unrequited love?

yes kind of, eh

33. Have you ever had sex with a man?

yes

34. Have you ever had sex with a woman?

No.

35. Have you ever kissed someone older than you?

Yes

36. Have you ever liked one of your best friends?

no

37. Have you ever liked someone who your friends hated?

ha kind of, but no

38. Have you ever liked someone you didn’t expect to?

yes

39. Have you ever wanted someone you couldn’t have?

Yes

40. Have you ever written a song or poem for someone?

yes i write poems about people all the time, its a stupid thing i do, it makes me feel better

41. Have you had sex so far this year?

yes

42. How long can you just kiss until your hands start to wander?

not very long at all

43. How long was your longest relationship?

never had one

44. How many boyfriends/girlfriends have you had?

none

45. How many people did you kiss in 2011?

none

46. How many times did you have sex last year?

none

47. How old are you?

19

48. If the person you like says they like someone else, what would you say?

i would be intrigued on who it is and be happy for them

49. If you have a boyfriend/girlfriend, what is your favorite thing about him/her?

N/A

50. If your first true love knocked on your door with apology and presents, would you accept?

i dont really have one

51. Is there a boy/girl who you would do absolutely everything for?

yes

52. Is there anyone you’ve given up on? Why?

no, not yet at least

53. Is there someone mad because you’re dating/talking to the person you are?

my best friend was mad and tried to hide it from me but me being empathic could notice it immediately, even tho she told me it was okay. but i don’t talk to them anymore for many reason but also because i didn’t want to ruin our friendship

54. Is there someone you will never forget?

Yeah

55. Share a relationship story.

none haha

56. State 8 facts about your body

1. i can wiggle my ears 2. i have loss of pigmentation spots on my hips because of medication i used to take(yes they are very noticeable) 3. i am very flexible, contortion status, but at the same time i don’t think i’m flexible enough yet, but im one of the most flexible people i know (in person i mean). 4. my eyes turned from blue to completely green (not hazel) when i was younger and now i have only green eyes 5. i tan pretty easily 6. my hands are like really small lol 7. my shoulders are very naturally flexible 8. i can walk on my hands for quite a while, idk why i’ve just always been good at it, and i trained in acrobatics so yeah

57. Things you want to say to an ex

i don’t have an ex

58. What are five ways to win your heart?

lol idk, really i dont

59. What do you look like? (Post a picture!)

nah

60. What is the biggest age difference between you and any of your partners?

my biggest age difference between anybody i’ve had a thing with is two and a half years

61. What is the first thing you notice in someone? 

their height or their face

62. What is the sexiest thing someone could ever do for/to you?

lol idek, like taking consideration to your needs and like saying sexy things to me, and like saying how good i am or whatever

63. What is your definition of “having sex”? 

like a dick entering a vag

64. What is your definition of cheating?

Acting upon feelings you have for someone while being with/sort of being with someone else who does not know about the first someone.

65. What is your favourite foreplay routine?

i dont really know yet

66. What is your favourite roleplay?

making out maybe, i used to hate it, but just recently i really liked it idk why. and like just moving fast i guess and like talking

67. What is your idea of the perfect date?

haha idk, something active sounds nice. 

68. What is your sexual orientation?

Straight

69. What turns you off?

people with bad hygiene and assholes

70. What turns you on?

somebody who is muscly and funny

71. What was your kinkiest wet dream?

i’ve actually never had a wet dream

72. What words do you like to hear during sex?

fuck, i like that word haha

73. What’s something sweet you’d like someone to do for you?

just invite me over to have a good time haha

74. What’s the most superficial characteristic you look for?

someone that is physically fit probably 

75. What’s the sweetest thing anyone’s ever done for you?

my parents and family have done a lot for me

76. What’s the sweetest thing you’ve ever done for someone?

i dont even know

77. What’s your opinion on age differences in relationships?

if its legal then its okay in my opinon, love has no age (as long as its not illegal (of couse 15-17 year olds can go out with 18-19 year olds and its okay haha. 

78. What’s your dirtiest secret?

i dont even know man lol

79. When was the last time you felt jealous? Why?

i feel jealous probably everyday, but not out of spite, its like a good jealous at least most of the time. 

80. When was the last time you told someone you loved them?

i don’t know

81. Who are five people you find attractive?

oh god i don’t know

82. Who is the last person you hugged?

i think Bruno...

83. Who was your first kiss with?

Quentin

84. Why did your last relationship fail?

i never had one

85. Would you ever date someone off of the Internet?

ehhh it depends, im more of a person who likes to meet people organically