#IF YOU LIKE STRANGER THINGS YOULL STILL LIKE THIS ACCOUNT
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elevanscapsicle · 2 years ago
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HEY EVERYONE!
THIS TUMBLR ACCOUNT IS NOW CONNECTED TO MY WATTPAD, AND YOU CAN FIND ME THERE AS “elevanscapsicle”
I LIKE TO MAKE GRAPHICS AND WRITE SILLY LITTLE STORIES!
ABOVE ARE A FEW OF MY MOST RECENT GRAPHICS, YOU SHOULD CHECK THOSE STORIES OUT, THEY’RE ALL ON WATTPAD!!
THANK YOU!
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englishbreakfasttae · 3 years ago
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obsession | jjk
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➔ Warnings :  🔞
This work of fiction contains dark themes and may not be suitable for all readers, mutual masturbation, phone sex, praise kink, cursing/dirty talk, pillow riding, exhibitionism, dom!jimin, sub!reader, voyeurism, mild degradation, fingering, yandere character, stalking, hacking, manipulation.
➔ Word count : 6.1k
➔ Masterlist : click here
➔ Tags : @ mwitsmejk
➔ Author’s note : this the edited and newest version of obsession. i had previously started writing it last year and published it till chapter 5 (i believe). however, i ended up not liking how the story turned out so here i am attempting to make something out of it for the final time. please let me know your thoughts. constructive criticism is always welcomed. 
Art credit : NaBHaN (devianart)
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C H A P T E R  1 :--
C U R I O U S I T Y  K I L L E D  T H E  C A T
“I’m so curious about knowing the unknown; it can be scary, but I see it as a game.”
– Hrithik Roshan
You place the cup on the auburn table. Warm liquid flows out of it leaving a mark on wood’s surface in the shape of a ring. You stare at it, you stare at the computer screen, and then back at the table covered with reminiscent of pomegranate tea. Wiping the stain using your index finger as your legs fidget under the desk. How bad can it be? It’s just a one-time thing, and you’re experienced enough to venture out on your own. You think about the time K00kies97 warned you about the dark side of the internet as you contemplate your decision.
K00kies97 : ur still new dont do it alone anytime soon
You : it’s not that deep
K00kies97 : but its dangerous
K00kies97 : you never know who youll run into
You : fine :/
You : what are we learning today?
K00kies97 : ARP poisoning
He was quite surprised to know your interests, well, to some extent. He had an interesting username, you always thought. It wasn’t rocket science but it was something that he was proud of, creating the lamest username to bluff people into thinking it was just one of those run-of-the-mill accounts that liked to shop online and play Overwatch. Of course, you didn’t speculate on your own that it was a hacker’s account. But what you did guess right was that he was born in 1997, someone around your age. And that he perhaps liked cookies a lot.
It’s been three weeks since you have continued your lessons or even talked at all. You met on Reddit one fine day; he came across your subreddit on wanting to learning hacking but not being able to find a tutor. He needed to pay college tuition and it was just a perfect source of extra income that didn’t clash with his part-time job and the timing was flexible for both of you. It was a match made in heaven.
You’re not going lie to yourself about your little crush on him. It’s bizarre because you’ve never met him, never seen his face, never even heard his voice. But you think a lot about him these days, something you’ve never revealed to him. There’s something very attractive about a stranger who knows his way around the internet and can-do cool things. It turns you on.
The cold spell between the two of you was caused due to an argument you had over exploring deep web own your own, which he dismissed faster than Barry Allen travelled from one timeline to the other. It hurt your ego to see someone think you’re not good enough to take a risk on your own so you ended up arguing.
Now you’re regretting your decision but your pride won’t let you text him first. Well, at least not with an apology. You brainstormed and concluded that if you’re able to achieve this milestone on your own and send him a victorious text, things might go back to normal. You have made up your mind.
You nervously shuffle on your chair, elbows pointing diagonally as you type away on the Tor browser. You come across a few chains of links and click on it. You know you shouldn’t absentmindedly open any link that pops up as it can contain viruses or something even worse. But you feel like a child at a candy store, all the links are like different flavours of sweet heavens; it’s not good for your health but it’s quite tempting. You stumble across certain chartrooms filled with conversations and codes you don’t understand.
Clicking on a link that leads to a forum, you try to crack the encryption using your basic coding skills mustered up with the training by K00kies97 in the past four months. It is an easy task and you realise why – it’s a website similar to Silkroad or even a branch of it, for all you know. You mentally pat yourself for starting successfully. But you don’t stay on the website for long, you click on the exit button. As you voyage through various links a chat window pops up at the bottom of the screen. The message reads a simple and non-threatening “hi”.
Excitement surges in your body as you eagerly begin to reply. The once warm tea is now cold, waiting to be tasted but you couldn’t care less. You have a new source of entertainment. You reply with a “hello”. Patiently tapping your fingers on the edge of your keyboard, you wait for their reply. Within a few seconds, you receive a link. Curiosity gets the best of you and you click on it.
The screen goes blank and you see your terrified reflection on the dark display. You reach out to the keyboard but before you can type anything, the screen comes back to life as if nothing happened. The chart box is still open and their username now reads EdgarAllenPoe.
EdgarAllenPoe : Gotcha.
You : wtf was that?
EdgarAllenPoe : What was what?
You : what was that link? is it some sort of virus?
EdgarAllenPoe : No my dear. I was just fucking with you. XD
You : it’s not even funny
You : fuck off
You quickly press on the X button, wanting nothing to do with the creep anymore. You close all the tabs, re-check your VPN access, deep clean your computer, and search for a possible breach of privacy – you find nothing suspicious. Stretching your arms, you release a long yawn. You get up and walk towards the bathroom, wanting to take a shower after a long tiring day. What you don’t realise is the turning on of your monitor’s webcam; the tiny red dot gleaming slightly and then vanishing all at once, unnoticed by your worn-out self.
‚ ✔ ’
Sitting on the edge of your bed, your legs swing back and forth as droplets of water runs down your spine, clad in a baby pink bathrobe. You stare at his photo. His silver hair parted; his plump lips formed in a cutesy pout – he smiled like an angel. You scroll past that post and find him at a club, an old-fashioned whiskey glass gripped loosely in his hand as he looked at the camera. He had a devilish grin on his face.
Six months, fourteen days, and twenty-two hours ago was the last time you had sex which was a breakup sex with your long-term boyfriend, now ex-boyfriend – Park Jimin. You had been dating him ever since high school, your friends even called you the ‘ideal couple’. Everyone around you, though very happy to see you two together, was jealous of how they didn’t have what you lovebirds had. What they didn’t know was that with time your liaison had lost the spark. The physical aspect of the relationship was evergreen but the emotional half of it had slimmed down to the point you two sat together one day and decided that it’s better to part ways. It was a mutual agreement.  
It took you some time to move on but somehow it was easier than you thought. Maybe it was because you had it coming even before the breakup. But now because of your ever-so-growing libido, you couldn’t resist wanting to see him again. You had tried online dating, and even going on blind dates but none could par with Jimin. He was like the human version of Aphrodite. You can never resist him. And you feel guilty as charged for constantly communicating with him in the past few weeks.
What started as a casual post breakup conversation on social media has now bloomed into “yes, I want to fuck you
 no, I want to get fucked by you both physically and emotionally.” Pfft, you didn’t say that to him in real life, it was just a thought you possessed in the back of your sexually frustrated mind. You had decided today to phone him and to talk.
“Hello?” His soft voice makes a smile creep up on your face when he picks up after the third ring.
“Hi Jimin,” you sigh contently.
“_ _ _, ah how are you?” Jimin straightens his posture as he realises it’s you.
“I am- I am doing great actually,” you lie. You’re anything but great. You want to lunge on him and rip his clothes off but that would be an odd conversation starter. “How have you been?”
“Just a little tired, it’s going to be midnight here in America.”
“Oh, I’m sorry,” you chuckle embarrassingly. “I didn’t realise it’d be so late there. I can call you some other time then.”
“No no no no.” You hear his velvety laughter. “It’s the perfect time to talk
” He hesitates. “I kind of miss you.”
Your heart skips a beat. Pulling your phone away from your face, you internally scream. FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK. What are you supposed to reply with?
“I guess I feel the same way, hence, the phone call.” You sound like you’re uncertain rather than returning his heartfelt confession. You mentally face-palm yourself for acting like a fourteen-year-old teenage girl talking to her crush.
You imagine him shrugging on the other side, a stupid smile flaunting on his face – which turns out to be true. You know him so well. “What are you doing?”
“I just took a shower.” You answer as you fiddle with the string of your bathrobe.
He asks with mischief laced in his tone. “And what are you wearing?”
“Right now? You know, a robe. The baby pink one.” You blush thinking about how he can turn the conversation in a completely different direction.
“Apparently, your favourite colour,” you add.
“Hmm, interesting.” You hear him shuffle. Is he sitting on a bed too? “Do you want to take it off? I’d like you to take that off.”
“Maybe.” You tilt your head to the side as you view your reflection in the floor-length mirror facing your bed. You see yourself lazily sprawled across the satin covers with your legs spread open, suspended from the bed.
You slowly untwine the strap of fabric holding your robe together, all while your eyes remain focused on your reflection. As the robe descends your body and falls on the bed, bit by bit your figure is unravelled. The wrap comes undone flaunting your glistening collarbone and your perked-up breasts, nipples poking out. And your soft tummy, and your belly button, and
 The reveal stops there.
“It’s off,” You confess.
Jimin’s demeanour changes. “Good girl. Are you in your room?” He asks in a husky low-toned voice. His voice dives directly to your core and you shudder.
“Yes, I am. On the bed, facing the mirror.” You hear a low grunt. He knows your little kink for exhibitionism and your vintage mirror that you keep for the sole purpose of looking at yourself when you do dirty, dirty things. And you know how much he loves it.
“You just love it when your pretty little naked body is on show?” He whispers sensually.
“I do.”
You are growing impatient. He can hear it in your voice. But he’s the type of person who likes to torture slowly. He sinks into his couch, tilting his head to the side, and reaches down to palm himself through his pants. The mere knowledge of him being the cause of your frustration is turning him on.
“Jimin?” You whimper. Why isn’t he responding to you? You are growing more and more frustrated as the seconds pass by.
“Yes, dear?” You moan when the words leave his mouth. You loved it when he called you with nicknames. You love nicknames. You run your cold fingers across your hardened nipples, pinching it slightly.
“What are you doing right now?”
“Guess?”
“Mhm, must be something outrageous,” he groans. “I want you to take that pretty hand of yours lower. Do it slowly. And touch yourself.”
You put him on speaker mode and place the phone beside you. You leisurely lift your robe completely, leaving you stark naked. You spread your legs further and view your dripping slit in the mirror as you run two fingers up and down. It makes you moan harder. Which makes him release a grunt he didn’t know he was holding.
Jimin quickly unzips his pants and shoves it halfway down his thighs along with his boxers. His cock springs free, bobbing against his stomach. After gaudily spitting into his palm, he drags it up and down his shaft. You mewl as you hear him making a mess of his cock.
“Oh fuck, _ _ _ _. You make me so hard.”
“Mhm.”
“Now put a finger inside.” You obey as he says, your uneven moan answering his order.
You fondle with your breasts with one hand and finger yourself with the other as you put on a show for your reflection in the mirror. Your eyes flutter shut as you imagine Jimin pumping himself – his pretty face covered in pearls of sweat, his thick eyebrows furrowed, his long eyelashes shut, and his luscious pink lips puckered in a pout. The urge to kiss him right now is increasing as your moans get muddled and you near your peak.
“Fuck, Jimin!” You whine.
Jimin’s relaxed strokes have now increased its pace. He bites his lips trying to suppress his vulgar groans. He needs to remember that it’s midnight where he lives and he does not want to wake up his neighbours. His lifted shirt exposes his defined abs, droplets of sweat dripping down and reaching his pubic hair streaming down from under his belly button to his member.
“Jimin, fuck! I want you so fucking bad.” You’re panting desperately, rubbing your clit vigorously while you finger yourself.
“I know doll. I want you under me. I want to fuck you so bad and so hard, just the way you like it.
“You sound so fucking needy.”
“Is that so? Put another finger inside. Now!” You know you pulled a nerve but it’s turning you on even more.
“Y-yeah,” you reply, easing in another finger. You’re indeed so wet and ready. If only it was his hardened length entering you. You’re left with your incomplete want for only a second when Jimin’s hoarse voice cuts your train of thoughts.
“Now put a third finger.”
“What? It’s too much.” You try to even out your breath. He hisses in return.
“Do as I tell you.”
You insert your ring finger inside your dripping wet cunt, cursing under your breath while adjusting to the tightness.
“What was that?”
“It’s too tight Jimin.” You say honestly.
“My baby has not been fucked rightly all these months,” he manages to form the perfect sentence all while pumping himself so hard he’d combust any moment. He wants to make you feel good, and for that, he’s willing to do anything right now. Even if it ends up waking up his neighbours.
“Fuck Jimin, I’ve been waiting for your big dick.”
“I’m here now baby”
“I want you to ruin me with that big fat cock,” you gasp.
That’s all it takes for Jimin to come undone as he lifts his hips off the couch and fucks himself upward into his hand while moaning your name as loudly as possible.  Your dirty talk has that effect on him. It still amazes him when a person who looks as innocent as you, with your puppy eyes, can say those lewd words.
You have not reached your high yet, you’re edging. Jimin catches his breath and tries to compose himself. Wiping off sweat from his face he coos. “Is there a pillow nearby?”
“Yes, hold on.” You hastily pick up an idle pillow and wait for his further instructions.
“Fold it, and ride it,” he whispers. “Ride the pillow imagining it’s me.” You turn around and sit up on your knees. You angle the folded pillow in a way that you’re again facing the mirror. You lower yourself till your core touches its surface, you hiss the moment your dropping clit comes in contact with the soft fabric.
“Good girl.”
You look right into the mirror making eye contact with your reflection. You bite you lower lip, your teeth grazing the soft skin delightfully. You gently rock yourself gently all while looking yourself in the mirror, causing an eruption of friction between your heat and the fabric. It feels so good. You hold the pillow with one hand while squeezing your breast with the other. “It feels so good.”
“I know baby. Are you imagining riding me?”
“Yes,” you confess. You imagine Jimin laying down under you instead of the pillow. You imagine running your palms across his toned abs and his soft locks. You pivot your hips faster and roll your head back, closing your eyes. You breast jiggles as you increase your pace. Jimin guides you through the high, in his sweet seductive voice.
“Say my name,” Jimin urges.
You moan his name again and again as if it’s a hymn that’ll save you from everything. You buck your hips harder and pant breathlessly. You know you’re very close. Your body starts trembling and you have to use both your hands to balance yourself on the bed.
“Come for me baby, come for me.”
You let go of all the restraints you’ve been holding for so long. His command is enough to make you shudder and release. You arch your body, whimper loudly for the whole world to hear, and roll your eyes to the back of your head as you reach orgasm. Your body is still slowly rocking back and forth, riding the euphoria. You look at yourself in the mirror; face glowing both with sweat and the after effects of pleasure, hair bunched up in a mess, and knees placed weakly on the bed. You plop flat on the bed and try to calm yourself.
You both stay quiet on the line for a while, trying to match each other’s inhaling and exhaling.
“Jimin?” You rasp.
“Hmm?”
“When will you come back to Korea?”
He hesitates for a bit, drawing in a wave of disappointment in the pit of your stomach. You regret asking him at all, knowing the answer.
“Soon,” he answers cautiously.
“Alright,” you bite your lip. “It’s getting quite late Jimin, you should get some rest.”
Jimin doesn’t fail to notice the change in your tone. He doesn’t know what to say, he cannot comprehend how he feels.
“Thank you for today, Good night ___.”
“Good night,” you say softly and end the call. You throw your phone across the bed and sigh. You look up at the ceiling wondering what must be going on in Jimin’s mind. There’s nothing you can come up with, he is unpredictable sometimes. You hate it and you give up on thinking.
You’re slowly drifting off to slumber but jolt upright when you hear your cell phone chime. It must be Jimin, you think. You’re hopeful.
You reach for your phone and unlock it. Your heart is beating recklessly. You become disappointed again when you see it’s a message from an unknown number. Yet, you still open it.
Unknown [ 1:10 PM ]
You are a dirty little girl.
That’s highly unlikely of Jimin. You decide to reply anyway.
You [ 1: 13 PM ]
who’s this?
The reply comes so fast, it seems like the person was waiting for your answer all this while.
Unknown [ 1:14 PM ]
You know, an old friend.
You [ 1:15 PM ]
i’m sorry, could you be more specific?
Unknown [ 1:15 PM ]
Of course, my love. This is Edgar Allen Poe. You can call me Poe.
Your blood turns cold. You reread the message once again, and again, not believing the sight your eyes are seeing. This cannot be happening. How did this person get your phone number? You gulp hard and look on your left, your computer sitting straight, daunting you to turn it on. Your beating heart is telling you two things. One, you’re fucked. And two, you need to contact K00kies97 so that he can fix the blunder you’ve created.
You hear another notification and look at your phone screen.
Unknown [ 1:19 PM ]
Oh, don’t look so glum now. Doll.
You desperately look around the room, searching for a hidden person peeping at you through the window or someone braking into your house. You find no one. The text is mocking you, and you know it. You are scared but you don’t know what to do.
As a starter, you block the Unknown phone number first and head for the computer.
‚ ✔ ’
A week has passed by and you haven’t received any form of communication from the self-proclaimed Edgar Allen Poe, you laugh bitterly recalling their name. You think it’s a mere coincidence, them naming themselves as your favourite author. After brainstorming with K00kies97 you came to the conclusion that it is just some decent hacker trying to mess with you. You have also learned your lesson that one shouldn’t wander in places that are dark and unknown.
It was quite surprising for you when K00kies97 forgave you so quickly without a single word of reprimand, he was willing to help you to solve your problem in a breath. If it was you in his place, you wouldn’t have forgiven someone easily but you’re thankful that he’s not like you. He’s kind, that much you know. And you’re thankful that even after being scared as hell, he can somehow make you feel calm. He has that effect on you.
“You’re dozing off quite a lot,” points out Wendy as she looks warily at your fatigued form. “And look at the bags under your eyes.” Your dear friend aims her index finger at your face.
“Please tell me it’s because of rendezvous with a hot guy rather than the amount of studying you’ve been lately doing,” Jisoo chimes in as she nods in your direction.
“Eh it’s nothing much, I’ve been binge-watching Netflix these days,” you fake a chuckle which doesn’t go unnoticed by Wendy.
“No worries, love. I’m back from my aunt’s place and we’re going to have a restful blast!”
“Restful blast?” Jisoo deadpans.
“Can you guys keep quiet?” A pale guy sitting across the library desk looks quite frustrated as flicks his gaze from Wendy to Jisoo to you.
Just as Jisoo is about to respond with something sassy you get up and pull her by her elbow, “guys it’s 5:00 PM already, we should take a break for today.”
Wendy arranges her stationary supplies and gathers it in her Satchel. You have a habit of walking home with Wendy and Jisoo after long hours of studying at the university library. You’ve always liked doing things with Wendy ever since you were kids. You used to play in her backyard, her mum used to bake cookies and give it to you in a Tupperware to take home. You mum then used to bake pumpkin pies and give you the job of delivering. Wendy and you then used to finish all the pie whilst sitting on her kitchen counter. You two shared everything, from clothes to homemade food to secrets. Your bond was unbreakable. Jisoo joined the squad much later so there’s still a lot to bond but she’s extremely valuable to you as well.
The three of you scramble towards the nearest campus exit and resume your daily gossiping. Your phone dings making your heartbeat race. It can be two possible people, either Jimin – who hasn’t contacted you since the impromptu sexy times you had a few days ago or the EAP – the unknown person who knocked the sanity out of you just a few days prior as well; the former you’ve been waiting for and the latter you’ve been dreading. Or it could just be a classmate asking for lecture notes.
You take out your phone from your jeans’ pocket and unlock it, completely blocking out your surroundings and the sound of your friends conversing.
Unknown [ 5:34 PM ]
â˜ș
Your eyebrows furrow in confusion. What can this possibly mean? You stare at the phone screen long enough that your vision starts blurring until a hand waves in front of your face. You look up to see Jisoo waving her hand in your direction.
“Eat up,” she tells as she shoves a bag of pretzels in front of you.
You frown and take the packet from her hand and dig in, trying to forget about the mysterious message you received. But in the back of your subconscious mind, you are feeling uneasy. Lucky for you, you won’t have to spend the night alone as your roommate slash classmate Wendy will be home.
“So did your family like Hoseok?” asks Jisoo.
“They didn’t just like him, they loved him!” Wendy has been in a serious relationship with Jung Hoseok for the past year, they met on college campus – him being one-year senior she was completely smitten; hence, they started their romantic escapade which is escalating faster than people had anticipated. “But enough about me, _ _ _ had phone sex with Jimin. Does that mean you’re getting back together?”
You steal a glance around you hoping no one apart from you three heard it. Jisoo looks at you in utter disbelief. “Ya! Why didn’t you tell me?”
“It was nothing really,” you brush it off. “Besides, you were busy with your internship so I didn’t wanna bother you.”
“I wasn’t that busy,” she counters, emphasising the ‘that’ as she looks daggers at you through her lashes. “Seriously though, what do you see Jimin as?”
You sigh and stare at a kid holding a cone of glistening ice cream, slowly on the verge of dripping.
“I honestly don’t know. We did our thing, right? And then I asked him if he’s coming back to Korea or not and he said ‘soon’. I don’t know what I feel about him and why I feel this weird feeling in the pit of my stomach whenever I have to say goodbye to him after texting or calling him.” You pause. “I knew I was over him like a month ago, then where the hell are these feelings coming from?”
“Do you still love him?”
“I don’t feel butterflies the way I felt back then but
” Your gulp hard. “but I do want him to be around for some reason, to fill that hole he left in my heart when we parted ways.”
“Looks like you need to get laid.”
“Jisoo!” Wendy gasps. You start laughing making the two of them burst out in chuckles too.
“What? I’m right, ____ needs to be dicked down to forget the dick that keeps her on hold after phone fucking her.” Jisoo shrugs. Wendy snorts and looks away. She is indeed right, you think.
‚ ✔ ’
You step out of the elevator and make your way towards your front door followed by a confused Wendy as she fishes out the apartment keys from her bag. Your spot a parcel sitting idly at your doorstep making you furrow your brows.
“Did you order something Wen?” you turn to look at her. She drops her gaze to the package and reads the address out loud, “it’s addressed to you.”
Puzzled, you pick it up and inspect it closely while Wendy jams in the key and unlocks the apartment door. There’s no sender’s address written. You discard your blazer and search for a knife in the kitchen. Wendy watches you while she takes out vegetables from the fridge to cook dinner. You quickly scramble to the living room with the knife and package in either of your hands, anticipation getting the best of you.
You stab the tape and rip it open. A baby pink coloured cushion is revealed when you open it. Running your fingers on it, you feel the silk fabric warm your skin. You find a piece of paper folded at the bottom as you fumble with the contents in the box, heaps of paper cuttings are scattered inside. You pick it up and unfold it. A short note is printed that says,
♡
Dear ____,
Your skin is the only touch I crave.
Your name is a fraction on my body that I want to engrave.
Your sweet nectar is all I want to taste.
Not a single bit of you I want to waste.
Watching you mound a pillow oh-so ravenously,
All I want to do is make love to you every day mercilessly.
Yours
Edgar Allen Poe.
♡
You freeze, and low-key cringe at the pathetic and cheesy piece of poetry.
“What is it ____?” Wendy probes from the Kitchen.
“Uh-oh nothing,” you stutter. “I mean, uh, I ordered this cushion for my bed.” You pick up the pillow and show it to her.
“Looks boujee, where’d you get it from?”
“Uh there’s this website
 I’ll just send you the link.” You lie again. Your phone dings and making alarms ring in your head. You start walking towards your room. “I’m feeling tired Wen, going to take some rest.”
She looks at you with softened eyes, “alright, I’ll call you when dinner’s ready.”
But she has known you long enough to catch your white lie.
‚ ✔ ’
 K00kies97 : wHAT DO U MEAN BY THAT
You : I said I received a pillow and a disturbing note from this EAP guy. Followed by a text.
K00kies97 : send me the note and text
You : I can’t, it’s embarrassing
K00kies97 : are u seriusly worried about that rn
You : alright
K00kies97 : waiting
You muster up the courage to send him the note and the message that said “Did you like it doll? -EAP”
K00kies97 : what does he mean by watching u mound a pillow
K00kies97 : dudes sick
K00kies97 : 😐
K00kies97 : wAIT
K00kies97 : you
K00kies97 : had $3X with a pillow
Kookies97 : wow
You : that’s not the point.
You : STOP
You : this is why I didn’t want to send it!
K00kies97 : okok
K00kies97 : check if theres hidden cameras or something in the pillow
You : your mind
K00kies97 :
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K00kies97 : you can thank me later luv
You : ok luv
You : boy have I missed you XD
K00kies97 : have u
You : did I stutter?
K00kies97 : okok
You : ok so I checked it and no it’s just a simple pillow

You : looks very expensive though
K00kies97 : 😐
K00kies97 : theres a stalker on the loose and this is what u care about
You : well I’m broke and this is fancy so yeah maybe I do care about it a little
K00kies97 : so if ur stalker asks u out on a date would u date him
You : no I would prefer to live
K00kies97 : really tho would u
You : why are you so interested? are you my stalker?
K00kies97 : wHAT
K00kies97 : NO
You : haha just kidding
You don’t get a reply after that. You like to think that he’s busy. That’s the reasoning you give yourself when he keeps going offline abruptly without any notice or replies. However, it feels like a weight has been lifted from your shoulders, you needed to tell someone about this. You cannot share it with Wendy or Jisoo because they will get unnecessarily worried, would probably end up giving you the talk. And they didn’t even support you communicating with K00kies97 in the first place, so they will probably start an intervention. You don’t want that. But the problem at hand, this Edgar Allen Poe who wants to, god forbid, do wild things to you, is still pending.
How will you get out of this one?
‚ ✔ ’
“Good morning sweetie,” Wendy bemuses. “You woke up quite early?”
“Yeah I have an early class with professor Brown.” You pick up a banana and gently peel it. Wendy studies you while you stride across the room, picking up necessary items for today and shoving it in your bag. “Why are you so early?”
“I have started this workout challenge by Chloe Ting so I thought why not do it first thing in the morning?”
“That’s awesome Wen. Send me the link, we can do it together.”
“Sure,” she fishes out her phone. “Oh, and by the way,” she starts, catching your attention back to her while you munch on a second banana. “I’ll be staying at Hobi’s place tonight so don’t wait for me for dinner
 You’ll be okay with that, right?”
“Of course, why’d you ask?” you enquire nervously.
“It’s just
 You’ve been acting a bit weird lately.”
Your face drops and you pause for a second to think about the perfect excuse. “No, no it’s just some stress related to studies and the fact that we’re graduating this year.” You lie, fiddling with your bag’s shoulder strap; eyes on the ground. “But you know what? Screw it, we should have a girls’ night out soon.”
“Absolutely!” she widely grins at you. “And ____, I wanted to talk about some- oh no, that’s no. I’m just- My brain isn’t working right now, go now! You’ll be late for class.”
“Alright then, gotta go. Bye Wen.” You wave at her and open the front door of your shared apartment. You stumble across a huge pile of cardboard boxes covered in bubble wrap. Two men carrying more luggage past your flat and into the next door. Must be new neighbours, you think.
Hopefully, they’re nice.
‚ ✔ ’
Sitting in the cafeteria you scratch Jisoo’s arm to catch her attention even as she’s consumed by her smartphone. “I need attention Soosoo.”
“But I won’t give it to you.” She makes a funny face. “Shoo shoo.”
“I’m not a dog.” You poke her again. This time with more intensity.
“Fine then, you’re a stinky skunk.” She smiles. You’re not sure whether it’s because of your childish bickering or her phone.
“Then you’re a
 You’re a
” You think hard. “Ah! You’re a Hoatzin!”
“What the fuck is that?” She looks at you blankly.
“It’s a stinky tropical bird found in Amazon and Orinoco Delta in South America. The Stink Bird gets its charming name because of its digestive system. It’s the only bird in the world that lives almost entirely on a diet of leaves. It uses bacterial fermenta-“
“YAH! Did I ask you to be an encyclopaedia?”
“You asked what it was,” you mumble. “So, I answered.”
“When I ask you what’s your name, do you also give me your social security number?”
“No.” She has a point; she always has a point. And she’s always right. If only you could switch bodies with Jisoo for the rest of your life, it would be so pleasant to live.
“Hey, did you see that hot guy next door that moved in today?” Wendy joins in the conversation with a topic of her own.
“What hot guy?” Jisoo asks dryly, her eyes on her phone – typing away.
“A guy moved in next door to our place,” Wendy says cheerfully. “He has got thick thighs and arms, he’s ripped. Thought I’d say hi but by that time he was gone, maybe to pick more stuffs. He was hot.”
“Do I need to remind you about Hoseok?”
“Hmm, Wendy?”
“Well, no man can ever come par with him. He’s the man of mans. He’s my man.”
“Aww, that was so heartfelt,” Jisoo fake sobs. “Now about the hot guy, is he bang-able?”
“Pfft, undeniably.”
Wendy and Jisoo peep at you at the same time, an evil grin plastered on their faces. You know what this means but you pretend to be dumbfounded. You look back at them with a confused look.
Jisoo starts, “look ____, on a normal day I wouldn’t say this but god wants you to be happy. You are being delivered with opportunity on a silver platter. It’s high time you take your shot. Bang that thighland like there’s no tomorrow.”
“Jeez Soo, do you have no filter?” Wendy snorts. “But she’s right. ____, it’s your time to shine on him
 Or under him. Whatever you like.”
You cover your face in your hands while you think about your outrageous friends telling you to do outrageous things. If you’re being honest, you don’t hate the idea. In fact, you might as well take a ride on that thighland.
“Hmm, I might take you up on that.”
You replay your conversation with your best friends while returning home. It brings a smile on your face. The lift opens, making you make eye contact with a pair of russet brown eyes. He nervously runs his fingers through his now-ash blonde hair. He beams at you. Your heart skips a beat as you see Park Jimin reared on your flat’s doorframe; waiting just for you.
⌧⌧⌧
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blxetsi · 4 years ago
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HIIIII!! can i get a pieck finger dating headcanons if that’s alright with you of course? your stuff makes me soft, stay safe!
yuh ‌ tysm for your request
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pieck finger dating headcanons (modern au)
pieck finger x gn!reader
warnings: literal fluff, no angst or anything i love pieck
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- bc pieck is assumed to be like 23-26 this wont be a uni au or anything
- idk i rlly think you guys wouldve met in a mundane way
- like you bump into her on the sidewalk and try to the really awkward "oh im so sorry i didnt see you there- no really it was my fault- are you sure youre okay ?- okay great- no im not hurt- yeah- okay have a good day and again im so sorry !!" thing with her
- and then maybe you guys see each other again at a coffee place, youre there with your friends and shes there with hers, and you dont wanna talk to her obv bc that would be awkward
- then ur friend makes u go and order another coffee for them, and while youre waiting for your order pieck comes and stands beside you
- and shes very observant yknow ?? if she sees a face its very hard for her to forget it
- so she immediately recognizes you and blurts out "its you !"
- and you have to be like "oh yeah ! it is me ! its you too"
- she finds it quite cute and giggles about it
- a very laidback person but also a very blunt person
- she doesnt find any harm in asking "can i get your instagram @" look she doesnt wanna be a creep and ask for ur number right at the start
- and it gives her a chance to find out what kind of person you are
- it would absolutely suck for her if such a cute face was posting fishing pictures and alt right propaganda yknow ??
- so you two do and then both of your orders come so you two give awkward goodbyes before going back to your groups
- her instagram is very pretty, nice themes
- she posted a couple of hours ago, with her and her friends in a park, taking a couple of posed photos while some looking like they were natural
- shes adorable and you cant help but feel your cheeks go warm as you basically stalk her page
- she dms you and says "are you too busy looking at my feed that you havent followed me yet ?" and you see this mf staring at you across the room like đŸ‘ïžđŸ‘ïž
- okay nosy lets calm down now đŸ™„đŸ€š
- you try to defend urself but ur typing so quick you keep making errors in your writing, she ends up saying something else
"you know, i was doing the exact same thing. youre beautiful you know"
- thank you pieck đŸ„°
- over the next couple of weeks thats how you two communicate. she'll send you instagram memes and edits of her favourite shows, movies, games etc. and you find yourself having a lot in common w her
- you check her story so frequently it becomes one of the first accounts on the top of your homepage
- and FINALLY, when she feels she can see you as a friend and not just some pretty stranger she met on the street she asks you out
- it was a simple thing, just to the movies, and she even let you pick which one !! (imagine its pre covid idfk)
- you two go and its an awkward hug before you both head inside
- you pay for your tickets and she gets an extra large popcorn and a drink
- you assume shes just v hungry but before you can order yourself something shes like "what are you doing i got this for us !!"
- rlly cute bitch omfg
- during the movies, after she eats literally most of the fucking popcorn, she pulls your hand out of your lap and holds it with her buttery one đŸ„°đŸ€š
- this bitch had crumbs and didnt even think to wipe them off
- you still held her hand tho anyways
- after that night you parted ways in front of the theater after making sure you two would be getting home safe
- and that became routine for a couple of weeks, not going to the movies obviously bc thats expensive but watching movies together !! youd go over to her apartment or she would come over to yours
- one thing about pieck is that shes very touchy
- one way or another she will end up cuddled with you on the couch
- it doesnt matter if its you being forcefully pulled on top of her body or her draping herself over you like shes a blanket, you two WILL be cuddling and you WILL enjoy it
- but finally, as if the gods gave you mercy, she finally kissed you
- it felt so nice, her lips were soft and sticky from her lip gloss and she tasted like the swedish berries you had gotten for her to munch on
- and the rest of the movie you two just sat there, kissing each other and giggling like teens
- she ended up staying the night, and complimented your bedsheets
- your relationship moved pretty fast after that
- she had already told all of her friends about you, they werent very surprised
- when you got officially introduced her friends zeke and porco tried to do that whole "if you hurt her.." speech before she slapped them and had marcel pull you away to safety
- other than that the night was very fun, you got to talking about your career, why you moved to the city, and other mundane topics
- pieck is actually a graphic designer, and everytime she comes to sleep over she just HAS to bring her laptop with her
- its basically just her laying in between your legs while she types away, youll pet her hair and lay soft kisses on her neck, and occasionally ask what shes doing
- she likes to tell you, has no problem in answering the questions you have, even if you think theyre stupid ones, shes very soft with you
- also a bit of a trickster
- for your first april fools together she slept over, you didnt have anything planned for her bc youre a good person and wont hurt the ones you love
- she stuffed your breakfast muffin with mustard 😁👍
- you gave her the cold shoulder for the rest of the day until she apologized by getting you a new muffin
- now she always dropped the l bomb to you, but she never needed you to say it
- thats why, when you were helping her cook dinner at her place you softly said "see ? and thats why i love you" she kind of,,, stopped what she was doing
- you realized why she wasnt washing the knife she used to cut your vegetables and tried to backtrack, but it was too late, she was already tackling you into a hug and taking you down onto the floor
- she just gave you kisses while repeating "i love you i love you i love you" over and over again
- bc of her you burnt ur fucking chicken smh
- you spent that night eating junk food and watching movies
- piecks a very observant person, so she always knows when youre sad too
- when you give that little huff when you come home to your (new !) shared apartment she knows something is up
- she'll slowly trail behind you as you walk to your bedroom, stripping to your underwear and changing into your pajamas
- you crawl into bed just wanting a nap to forget about the day, and she'll crawl in with you and hold you
- you never like to cry but youre so frustrated and upset at your coworkers, at that rude customer, at those deadlines, that you just breakdown
- and she lets you, she lets you almost suffocate yourself in her chest with how much your pushing your head into it, she strokes your hair while you choke on your own cries and hands you tissues when you need to blow your nose
- "what do you need my love ?" "i just need you" "okay baby"
- communication is a big thing in the relationship, and because shes been so open and honest from the beginning, talking about how you feel has never been easier
- in fact, you like talking about how you feel about your relationship, or how you didnt like what pieck said to your friends the other day, this and that, you feel comfortable and safe with pieck no matter what, which makes talking about even the most hardest things seem so simple and natural
- all in all, even when she wakes you up with spontaneous ice cream dates or asks that you put raisins in the popcorn during movie night, even with the fights and the crying and the exhaustion the next day, life would be much duller without her, and you only have to thank your clumsy self
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uhh i feel like this is very short but yeah ❀ requests are open so go crazy mfs ‌
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asillqnjsowk-blog · 5 years ago
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decadentrpg-blog · 6 years ago
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WELCOME EMILY, YOU’VE BEEN ACCEPTED FOR THE ROLE OF HELOISE DELACOUR
Admins Note: Heloise was certainly a difficult choice to make but after much assessment, I want to say that I absolutely adore what you’ve brought to the table! From build up of her background to every little historical reference that was placed within your application, it cohesively created this duality that Heloise has! I’ve enjoyed every interaction she has as well as the clarity and rationale behind her thinking! Your faceclaim request for Virginia Gardner has been approved. Congratulations on your acceptance again, please make sure to head your way to the checklist and submit your account within the next 24 hours!
Out of Character
Name / Alias: Emily
Pronouns: She/Her
Age: Twenty-two
Timezone: GMT.
In Character Application
Full Name: Heloise Delacour
Sexuality: Lesbian.
You like girls. No, that’s wrong. You love girls. You love the smoothness of their skin. You love their gentle curves, their bodies like oceans, refreshing and divine. You love stroking their hair as you lie between sweat-soaked sheets, curling it around your fingertips. You love sharing lipstick shades so it won’t get too messy when you kiss and the sound beaded dresses make when they hit the ground. Most of all, you love who you become around them. Bursting at the seams with euphoria, without a trace of shakiness in your footsteps, you unveil the creature you fought so hard to become - self-assured and valiant. You always slipped into her without thinking about it, knowing instinctively, that this was right. This was who you were supposed to be.
Gender/Pronouns: Cis-female, she/her
Hogwarts House:  Gryffindor.
The hat was adamant. They wanted you in Gryffindor. They wanted you to learn to harness your own roar, the find power in your sort of bravery - perhaps even to tame the brasher instincts of your peers, to calm the storm inside of them. Not every kind of bravery favours the bold, the defiant, the loud. There are different kinds of bravery. The courage to carry on when the chains around your neck drag you to the ground. The strength to try and try and try. The valour in turning yourself into an anchor, a steady weight for the rest of the world to ground themselves on. There are all sorts of bravery in this world, each as useful, each as needed, as the last. Children, yourself included, see so much, but so little at the same time.
You didn’t glimpse the potential in yourself. You wouldn’t for many years yet.
But the hat knew.
You pleaded for Hufflepuff, knowing you’d be able to carve a home out of the house. The world underestimated badgers, sneering at their perceived lack of intelligence, wit or ambition. You didn’t see that at all. You saw steadiness, a bedrock to build a person upon. It wasn’t a leap of faith. But society couldn’t be built around those who flew. Someone had to be waiting, down below, rooted to the earth, ready to catch falling angels.
The hat laughed.
“Better be
” Panic rose in your chest, a knot tightening inside of you. “GRYFFINDOR.”
They weren’t unkind to you. But you were the fawn in the pride of lions, the hovering figure in the background, the mute who never could make herself heard. Years later, with your personhood more fully attached, half of you wistfully wishes you could go back and do it better. Do it again. And yet, in your heart, you know there’s no value in looking backwards. You must journey on.
Head canons:
Trigger warnings for violence, war, alcoholism and mentions of abuse.
I. la petite fille
Your father - and you only have the confidence to say this now you’re a fledgling, grown to use her own voice - always cared far too much about what people thought. Cream of French society, darling of the elite, a career-hungry politician intent on climbing the ladder. Ironically, the sunshine in your soul can be traced directly back to him. And yet, where yours is woven into the very essence of your being, a warm touch to steady a storm, an easiness to still a monster, a brightness to diminish the darkness, his is a mask, a choking falseness. It was that, more than anything else, that scared you. He changed before your very eyes - shaking hands and kissing cheeks one second - to plotting behind their back the next. Nothing about him was real. He slipped between your fingers, never a solid thing to hang onto.
(The feeling, you know, is mutual. You were a grand disappointment. Too timid to follow in his footsteps and too honest to lie. You’re mostly strangers now, each unable to understand the other).
Your mother you know a little better. An English rose, she fell for your father’s charms one summer, a fling that never was supposed to turn into a marriage. You were the bump that interrupted those plans, the shame that would have befallen her good name. Both parties were hastily married and that was that. You’ve always wondered if she blamed you for it. Always been too afraid to ask. Your mother, you know, was miserable, far far away from home, shackled to a man she barely liked, forced to play the part of politicians wife. When she played it well, there was harmony in the household. But if she slipped up
all hell broke loose. And her, with her love of expensive wine and flirting with other people’s husbands, did mess up. You never witnessed the war inside of your father unfold, merely lived its after effects. Silently, you’d pull a blanket over your mother’s quivering frame and give your father his favourite cigar.
(As you grew, you became rather good at predicting the ticking time bombs. So before the storm ravaged, you nearly always scrambled to safety, grabbing your teddy bear and retreating to the back of the wardrobe. You never found a secret world in the back of there, but you did find safety - and that was a comfort in and of itself).
Peacemaker, your father would sometimes say with affection, your mother with scorn. You’d gulp and nod silently, opinions kept to yourself. Over time, a survival instinct became a pattern and from a pattern into a habit. Such things are hard to shake.
Ii. maison choisie
Your mother hailed from London’s big smoke and your father made Paris his home, so you’ve always been accustomed to cities - you could even say it’s in your blood. But nowhere ever felt like home more than your Grand-Mere’s home a stone’s throw from Amiens. Reluctantly, with great effort, your father would make the bi-annual privilege there, dragging your mother in tow. You never had to be forced, you galloped ahead, a country girl at heart. There was something so liberating about Amiens, especially in the summer, where the line between the fields and sky was impossible trace and wildflowers bloomed. Your grandmother was kinder than your parents, the only one who could pull you out of your shell - but even then, only when you were alone. More a hedgewitch than practiced individual, she used to set you upon a stool as she practiced her potions, entrusting you with the responsibility of stirring from time to time. She was the one who taught you that magic had more than rigid purpose, that it would be as beautiful as life itself.
She also taught you a second, valuable lesson.
You remember the very first muggle you met. You remember them because they waved joyfully as you stepped into the town square - and knew your father by reputation, your Grand-Mere by face. Your father, ever the diplomat, turned his face away, pretending not to have heard. You, bashfully, didn’t meet their eyes either. It was only later, when your parents had been placated by a bottle of wine or two, that your Grand-mere took you aside.
“Why didn’t you wave back?” Dumbstruck, you look for somewhere to scurry away and hide. Gently, she took your hand into her own. “I won’t hurt you chĂ©rie.”
“Maman et Papa didn’t.” And you never were awfully comfortable around strangers, bashfulness seizing control of you.
“They were wrong to.” Bopping your nose, your grand-mere drew giggles from you. “They didn’t wave because he was
” her voice strained over the English word. “A muggle. Have they told you not to talk to muggles?”
You shook your head.
“Don’t let them. There will be some, especially when you go to school, who tell you not to talk to witches who have muggle parents. You musn’t let them order you around. No one is any better or lesser because of the blood in our veins. Even muggles
they’re not witches. But they’re not the enemy. After all, if I never spoke to a muggle, I’d never speak to anyone! Never forget that.”
You promised you wouldn’t. You haven’t since.
Iii. armes de guerre Ultimately, it was war that drove you away from your beloved France and your cherished Grand-mere, who refused to stand down and flee when the German troops overran Amiens. You like to imagine she would not take a cowards way out, apparating whilst the others were rats in a barrel, trapped by the advance. You like to imagine she fought to defend her farm with every trick up her sleeve. You like to imagine she remained strong and valiant until the very end. But you’ll never know. The war snatched her from you, her story lost to the wind. All you had left was an owl from the French ministry and the personal condolences of the French Minister La Magie.
It took you a very long time to summon the courage to return. And even then, you couldn’t do it alone. Kenshin stepped in without being asked, the year after you left Hogwarts, stability at your side as you confronted the ruins of the happiest parts of your childhood. Violence had ravaged the landscape, scarring those who survived. Left with nothing, you saw the hallows of hunger in their sunken cheeks and poverty wrecked on their bones. Beauty had perished and been left to die. But in the ruins of her farm, you saw all was not lost. The Peach trees were still rooted, their bounty just as sweet. The goats, against the odds, made it out of the shelling alive. The old stool you had once assisted your grandmother had merely cracked, not splintered. Life went on - and through the cracks of darkness, light emerged.
You saw something of yourself in that light.
A hopeful creature, timidly taking her first steps into the world. A passionate believer in the strength of goodness, in victory and vanquish over evil. That progress, ultimately, would triumph. That even in the face of blasphemy, there is room for beauty, for brightness. The trick is in finding it and nourishing it, so that it may grow.
From seed to sapling to great oak.
The spark within yourself ignited that day. You felt your grandmother’s presence and smiled. You mourned, not in sadness, but in joy - for all the happiness that had been, for all that would yet come.
The world treads down on optimists, mocking their faith. But you’ve learnt there’s courage in that kind of relentless determination. That day, you felt its whispers in your soul. That day, you swore to let it go free.
Iv. soldat improbable The time that  followed ‘The Great War’ was supposed to be the long peace. If you look with hooded eyes, you’d find that in the cityscape of New York. Illicit drinking. Parties that last until dawn. Jazz bands. Woman’s emancipation. There is so much beauty, so much progress. But squint harder - and you’d find an underground war, a cold one, lurking just below the surface. It’s cause is more just than any muggle one ever fought. It isn’t a battle between great powers, princes and their cousins. It’s between right and wrong, progress and past, egalitarianism and inequality.
You know you’re not a likely candidate to fight in it. Most overlook you, sneering at your daintiness, soft smiles and open heart. They should understand that it’s what makes you strong, too. All you want is some small part in this larger battle, to be a part of the greater good. More than anything else, you’re a visionary, able to picture a world beyond this hatred. If you can see the brightness, you can be the brightness, a bedrock for those wearier than you, a guide for those who might come in your direction. You’re no warrior, not in the conventional sense, but not every battle should be fought with a weapon. Some need softer tools. You could be that person.
It is the sum of your duties with Dahlia. You see yourself in her, the girl you were but a few years ago, timid and unsure of the power in her own voice, but possessing a rosy heart. She deserves better. You long to show her that, to share your brightness and certainty in betterness, to pull her from the den of snakes and away from the Pride Society. You’re not asking her to fight, for the Coalition, for you
never. You simply want to help her. You would do anything - give her the means to runaway, a safe roof to shelter under, because you long to see her flourish. You’re just so afraid of failure
of failing her, your duty and yourself. The powers against you are overwhelming, those who wield the weapons lethal. The horrors she confesses terrify you. Light, as bright as it is, can be snuffed out. That is your greatest fear where Dahlia is concerned.
V. Coup de main As fun you’ll admit the parties Wren and Kenshin drag you out to are, you couldn’t carve a life out of them. Pleasure is for hedonists - and you do not count yourself among their ranks. When you found your own voice, the grit beneath porcelain skin, you were determined that it should count. You sought purpose in yourself, a way to matter. Almost as if you were trying to prove yourself
to yourself.
You found clarity in the most unlikely of places. A non-descriptive building in Queens - that would appear empty to an unsuspecting muggle. It’s purpose only became clear when you stepped inside, finding an overworked and overwhelmed refugee agency. In the aftermath of the great war, the creation of a dozen new states in Europe, thousands of wizards chose to emigrate instead, heading to the United States in search of a better life.
It’ll be tough work, the supervisor warned, staring you up and down, disdainfully. You bit your lip. Old habits die hard.
I’m tougher than I look. Promise. Your voice rang with clarity, in how true that statement had become.
You began volunteering on a trial basis. You distributed donations and held shaky people in your arms. You played with children and made puppets dance. After a fortnight, you began to offer your services as a translator, hoping to connect people into the interior of the US. A little while after that, you suggested you could be used by the organisation at large, rather than ad-hoc.
You felt a rush in your chest, advocating for yourself. You felt strong and brave and
right.
VI. bizarreries personnelles
Here are the little things that make you, you.
You never broke the habit of walking on your tiptoes, a legacy left from a childhood full of ballet dancing. Slender limbs, porcelain skin, your teacher used to sigh and wish you centre stage. Bashfully, you refused, your cheeks darkening. The spotlight was never yours to claim.
You cannot cook without making a mess. In your presence, the kitchen comes a bomb sight, ravaged by war. Nose flour-stained, fingers sticky, you chase Kenshin around the kitchen. You always catch him. He always allows himself to get caught.
Your pastries are infamous, light and puffy, the sort only the french know how to make. You refine your recipes with magic and tap your nose whenever anyone asks for their secrets. (Later, in fine ink, you pen them a letter, containing the details).
You despise British food. You ate dutifully at Hogwarts, too shy to even dream of asking for an alternative. Toad in the hole. Pies. Casseroles. Blegh.
You bit your fingernails until you were fifteen years old. Your mother enchanted them after that, exasperated at your lack of self-control. The spell has long worn off, but the manicure never lasts long. It’s a nervous tick.
You used to chew your hair. You threw off that habit by twelve.
Birthdays are your favourite times of the year. You take great pride in the gifts you give friends, a thoughtful gesture behind each one. You do, however, despise your own birthday. Being at the centre of attention makes you uncomfortable, you’d much rather spread and share the joy. Luckily, everyone’s learnt not to throw you surprise birthday parties. Instead, you have small, intimate gatherings.
(You and Kenshin have a ritual. A cupcake at midnight as eve becomes day.)
You’re hopeless at keeping plants alive. There isn’t a green bone - or thumb - in your body. You failed herbology miserably.
But you’re incredibly attentive when it comes to writing in your diary, daily and in french, to prevent eavesdropping eyes. A habit you haven’t shaken since your days in Gryffindor.
Your patronus is a lamb. An individual with a lamb patronus has a sort of natural innocence about them, and have a very serene disposition. They are kind to most, though they tend to have a difficult time reaching out and expressing themselves. They have a shy aspect of them that is not only social, but inner, which makes them hesitant to do many things. That said, they are very patient and calm creatures, which allow them to be workable with this nature.
You talk too much when you’re nervous. Far too much. About things that have nothing to do with anything. The weather. The latest show that opened on Broadway. The dance craze everyone’s talking about. Whether you should get a bob. You blabber, filling the space with
words. It’s endearing to most, but you despise it in yourself.
Your wand is 9 œ”, french-made and slim. Beech and Unicorn Hair. “The true match for a beech wand will be, if young, wise beyond his or her years, and if full-grown, rich in understanding and experience. Beech wands perform very weakly for the narrow-minded and intolerant. When properly matched, the beech wand is capable of a subtlety and artistry not seen in any other wood, hence its lustrous reputation.”
Languages are your forte. You have a knack for wrapping your tongue around them, inheriting a little of your father’s silver-tongued mantle. French is your mother tongue, but you’ve added English, Spanish, Italian and a pinch of Latin to the mix.
When you’re making a bold declaration or gesture, you rehearse the words in your mind the night before, like a politician preparing for a speech. You muse over the most effective way to get your point across, the comfort a person will be most receptive to, or whether it’s better just to hold someone and let them cry.
Connection expansion:
I. meilleur ami (Note: I’m happy to change all of this if the Kenshin player disagrees, this is merely my interpretation).
“Mon Frere
” Kenshin catches your grin. Deliberately, his mouth forms an ‘o’. “Ma sƓur” You wince at the deliberately butchered pronunciation, but smile nonetheless. He’s always had a particular knack for that, drawing the happiness out of you. And you for him. The only label that fits your description is that of platonic soulmate. Or big brother. For truly, the lines between friendship and family have blurred, that you can’t tell them apart. Certainly, he feels more like family than your own blood ever did.
You met on your tenth day at Hogwarts, in the middle of Herbology class. Devil’s snare wrapped around your hand, you panicked, but were too shy to raise you concerns, suffering in silence. Where few did, Kenshin noticed you - and calmed you down with that bluntness of his. Before you knew it, you were smiling, then laughing and then free. You’ve been attached at the hip since - and shall be, until death do you part. The years did little to change the pair of you. Where some friends grow apart, you grew together, slotting like two jigsaw puzzle pieces. By third year, you were spending Christmas together, Kenshin sensing your unspoken reluctance to go back to France and face the holidays with your parents. After your first one together, you confessed the truth, honesty no one had even known. But most of all, he brought light into his life - different to yours, more brazen and bold. Like two twinned suns, strung across the sky. He is your confidante, secret keeper, joker, dance partner and now, roommate.
The latter made sense. When the two of you ended up in New York at the same time (it’s impossible to imagine the two of you oceans apart, impossible and terrible and dreadful), it made sense for the pair of you to find a two-bed apartment in Manhattan and make it your home. You are as compatible roommates as you are friends.
And, for the first time, he made a house a home.
II. le fruit interdit (Again, I’m happy to alter things dependent on plotting w/ Prosperina’s player) You shouldn’t want to kiss her. If you are the doe, she is the wolf - a huntress determined to strike clean.  In your heart, you know you should hate that dynamic, as you know you should despise her - resent the intimidation that rises through your bones, abhore the uncertainty she makes you feel.. You should be afraid. Very afraid.
And in so many ways, you are. You’re scared of what your attraction to her says about you, now that you are both girls grown, living with the choices you make as adults. You aren’t school children anymore, you aren’t praying to be noticed, doodling hearts with your names encased in it. You’re fearful of what might happen if you find yourselves alone, in a dark - or a light - room. But you’re more frightened, in a strange way, of nothing happening at all.
With Prosperina, there are so many unspoken anxieties, so many things you can’t possibly wrap your head around, that you can’t possibly know. Why she notices you now. When you began to crave the burn. If the risk is worth a moments ecstasy. How beauty could wear such thorns.
You know, now, how Eve felt, in the Garden of Eden. Just one bite, the snake hissed. Just one kiss, Prosperina whispers. You have no wish to shed your wings and toss yourself from Paradise’s gate. But she’s just as beautiful as any angel you’ve ever gazed upon.
In Character Paragraph:
Thursday night, 9pm sharp, the Yale Club. Dress elegantly. Heloise didn’t need to glance down at the invitation to know its contents, her heart having memorised them ten times over, skipping a beat each time it paused at a cursive. Even Prosperina’s writing was beautiful. She would have liked to say that the invitation was unexpected, out of the blue and had been firmly rejected. Yet, since she distastes lies, she could not.
Heloise had, however, made an attempt or two to excuse herself. Sending an owl in return, she had outlined her disapproval of the Pride Society and its galas in no uncertain terms. Prosperina had take an age to respond - deliberately, Heloise supposed, to make her nerves hop and jump. When she had, Heloise could almost taste her tone. It’s not one of those. It’s for charity. Don’t you support charity? She had caved. Heloise couldn’t be sure if that was strength or weakness, good or bad.
Three days later, another letter had arrived. Wear pink. It matches the blush on your face.
Stepping into the room, Heloise steeled herself, a picture of defiance in angel-white, beads reflecting the light back.
Not so long ago, she would have cowered, a ghostly slip of a thing, trembling in the corner. Glass of champagne stitched to her hand, she would have sipped until someone had taken pity on her - and even then, she might have fled. That worked under the assumption she plucked the courage to attend at all. Time sandpapered everyone, some for the better, others for the worse. Heloise liked to think she took after the former.
The first eye she caught was from across the room, her gaze instantly drawn to the slip of a girl shrouded by demons, unable to do anything but stare from her cage. Dahlia. It hurt to see her here, to see the shackles bound and to know she was powerless to help. To approach her, to take her hands into her own and wrap her arms around her shoulders was to betray her newfound friend, to expose her doubts to the world. There was cruelty in watching her suffer - but there was greater cruelty in taking a hammer to the foundations below her feet. That wasn’t Heloise’s job. Hers was to encourage Dahlia to flutter her own wings, to learn how to fly. All in good time. Smiling softly across the room, she let her face say what her tongue couldn’t. Stay strong, keep the faith.
The second pair were Prosperina’s - appearing from nowhere, sneaking up behind. Departing from conventions and norms, she didn’t bother with small-talk. “You look ravishing. But not as pretty as you would have had in pink.”
Tongue-tied, Heloise searched for a response. No one had the power to shrink her anymore, now that she had freed her voice from its restraints. And yet, that didn’t mean anymore wit had returned to it. In times like these, she prayed for Kenshin’s presence at her side, always ready with a sharp retort, the sort that drew him closer to someone. Or even Wren, brazen and bold, who spoke without thought. You don’t want to impress her! One voice screamed.Not like you imagined you might, a lifetime ago.
And yet, a little bit of her did.
Heloise spurned her interest. But a little bit of her didn’t want to do without it either.
“I - Thank you. You look
” Staring at Prosperina for the first time, Heloise felt the breath be stolen from her lungs. Divine. Enchanting. “Like a million bucks.” Slanting her voice into an American accent for comedic effect, she immediately regretted her choice no sooner had it been said. “And this
it’s certainly big. Very big. I suppose that’s good. The more people you can fit in, the more donations you can collect for charity.”
Prosperina laughed. Heloise was never sure if she was being laughed at or with. She preferred to think it was the latter.
“The committee had a few reservations. Something about
vermin control. The guest list is rather exclusive, you see.”
Confusion flashed across her face. It wasn’t as if New York was a stranger to rodents
but something about her tone, about the look on her face
made it clear that it wasn’t animals she was referring to. Without noticing, Heloise had become a player in the game. The smile froze on her face. “I sure hope that isn’t a reference to the architects who built the place. Or the perfectly nice people going about their business on the floor below. They’re not doing any harm.”
“Ah yes, the No-Maj’s, as our Yank friends love to say.”
Heloise tensed on the mention of that word. She despised it. No-Maj. So
derogatory. And rather rude. As if they didn’t count as people, or deserve respect, on the merit of something they didn’t have - and had no choice in having. “I hate that term. I hate - you shouldn’t talk about them like that. Nobody should. They’re hardly hurting anyone. And technically, this is their territory so really we should - be respectful.” Exhaling heavily, she steadied herself.
“Oh,” Prosperina leaned in, all smiles now, tucking a strand of loose hair behind her ear. “You’re such a doll. I was only playing. But I can be nice, if you ask nicely.” Her touch felt like electricity, the sort of chemistry that couldn’t be duplicated or faked. When it was real, it was real. “I’ll go fetch us expensive champagne to make amends.” Half-purr, she broke off and Heloise dropped her gaze. “Pink Champagne, I think.”
Cheeks deepening into rosy-red, Heloise watched her depart, wishing she could look away.
Extras:
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spartalabouche · 7 years ago
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okay. here we go
so first of all, this was my very first boyfriend who im sure ive talked about like twenty times before on here but a refresher: started off really good but we started getting into fights and he would threaten me with dick pics when i didnt want to do something and would pressure me about sex a lot so we broke up. i think i blocked him after that or we just drifted apart but regardless he approached me again afterwards just wanting to be friends and i accepted and soon afterwards we got in a fight again and i blocked him and told him to leave me alone. this cycle repeated. maybe five times? ive lost count.
so im sure he wouldve actually left me alone after the last time but i was feeling especially lonely and i knew that if i was talking to him he would really appreciate my company because he still really likes me regardless of how many times ive snapped at him and he always tells me it will be different the next time we talk and i always believe him. so this last time i started talking to him again i approached him myself, i gave him my discord and we started talking again and everything was fine. this was six months ago
now, rewind a little bit, seemingly unrelated, but maybe a couple of months before i approached him myself, someone on tumblr on an account ive never seen before, they seem new and just wants to talk to someone who knows what theyre doing, they message me and ask if they can be my friend. i say yes because im friendly and they seem harmless and we talk for a bit, i ask for their name but they tell me theyd rather stay anonymous and ask i just call them anony
and then fastforward to about a couple weeks after i contacted my ex and started talking to him again. he says to me ‘i have something to tell you but im afraid youll be mad at me’ and im like well okay it can happen but if its important just go for it and ill try to understand
and he tells me hes the person going by anony on tumblr talking to me from a separate account without me knowing. and initially im like oh well that could be way worse thats fine i dont care and we continue talking like once a week or so and it goes fine until about a month ago im just thinking about it and its like
my ex boyfriend, who i had blocked beforehand, and told him not to talk to me again, created a new tumblr account and pretended to be someone i dont know just to talk to me again. and thats... thats a real violation of my privacy?
like tumblr is obviously a public website, and people can follow who they want, but the fact that he went out of his way to *contact* me and try to befriend me without me ever knowing it was him, i dont know how long it wouldve gone on or how long it would be until he revealed it was him if i hadnt knowingly reached out to him first.. its a shitty thing to do?
its a violation of my privacy, its disrespecting the fact that i told him not to talk to me again, regardless of whether or not i contacted him myself later anyway, he was taking advantage of me being friendly to strangers and honestly makes me wary to trust any other new tumblr people that just talk to me out of the blue. its fucked up.
so after a couple of weeks of dwelling on it and discussing with other people whether or not im overreacting or if its seriously as fucked as i think it is, i finally send him a message telling him that i think what he did is not fucking okay and that i genuinely do NOT want him to talk to me ever again, and if i for some reason contact him myself again i want him to block me immediately, though i dont plan on it ever happening again. 
and then i blocked him
hopefully for good this time
please lms if you read the whole thing
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cybernightwanderer · 5 years ago
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I went over the “How to Recognize the Signs of Mental and Emotional Abuse” article and heres whats familiar : 46 out of 64 Signs LOL
-Name-calling. They’ll blatantly call you “stupid,” “a loser,” or words too awful to repeat here. There were too many times my mom would come to my room yelling and threatning to beat, or actually beat me up and call me a whore and a piece of shit. Still does, just doesnt call me a whore now, just calls me stupid and a a piece of shit occasionally. -Character assassination. This usually involves the word “always.” You’re always late, wrong, screwing up, disagreeable, and so on. Basically, they say you’re not a good person. Everyday AALL DAY. Things i used or barely did as a child , and keeps trowing at as an adult. -Yelling. Yelling, screaming, and swearing are meant to intimidate and make you feel small and inconsequential. It might be accompanied by fist-pounding or throwing things. No need to even explain this. -Patronizing. “Aw, sweetie, I know you try, but this is just beyond your understanding.” “Ah nooo, youll never be responsible to have your own life” -Public embarrassment. They pick fights, expose your secrets, or make fun of your shortcomings in public. Yup...
-Dismissiveness. You tell them about something that’s important to you and they say it’s nothing. Body language like eye-rolling, smirking, headshaking, and sighing help convey the same message. Trying to explain to her i dont like something or i dont wanna do something and why, trying to explain certain things she does harms me. And i just get mocked and threatned instead. - Insults of your appearance. They tell you, just before you go out, that your hair is ugly or your outfit is clownish. Every single day. Also to a point that she did this many times in front of strangers, or in front of my friends.
-Belittling your accomplishments. Your abuser might tell you that your achievements mean nothing, or they may even claim responsibility for your success. Yup -Put-downs of your interests. They might tell you that your hobby is a childish waste of time or you’re out of your league when you play sports. Really, it’s that they’d rather you not participate in activities without them. I stopped practising my drawing skills because she would always say i had no future in drawing characters and shitty stuff. Even tho i was starting and practising. That i had no future in it. -Pushing your buttons. Once your abuser knows about something that annoys you, they’ll bring it up or do it every chance they get. Daily picking fights with me, the yells at me for fighting with her and misstreats me. -Threats. Telling you they’ll take the kids and disappear, or saying “There’s no telling what I might do.” Threatning to kick me off the house whenever i refuse to do something she tells me to. For example, a few years ago, i was barely holding on with a minimal wage , she would take a cut out of it, so there was this month i did a whole month without days off to try and gather money to go to barcelona. She knew i had money saved up and threatened to kick me off the house if i didnt give her extra 100 euros for house rent. Usually stuff like this always. -Monitoring your whereabouts. They want to know where you are all the time and insist that you respond to calls or texts immediately. They might show up just to see if you’re where you’re supposed to be. If i go out with my friends or stay in my friends houses, if i go to a concert or anything, she will non stop be calling me and texting until i reply. Even if i already told her who i would be with and where ( i have to tell her always ) And always have to tell what i am doing. If i dont she will be mad for weeks and take it out on me. -Digital spying. They might check your internet history, emails, texts, and call log. They might even demand your passwords. Like the previous one, she asks my aunt to sent her my ig stuff and fb stuff i post, so i had to remove my entire family from my social network. Because she would always come up to me daily “ ah u posted this why? “ wether it would be a selfie or a poem. And is always messaging me on whatsapp and humiliating me and crontrolling wich picture i post on whatsapp. I generaly like to post my user photo of whatsapp as something funny, wether its my face with a filter, or a funny meme. Two months ago i posted a guy with his ass pinned up, wich was hilarious. She kept yelling at me everymorning, and even threatned to hit me , to take the picture down , because it looked bad. The picture was something like this ( not this, but the pose kinda )
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- Unilateral decision-making. They might close a joint bank account, cancel your doctor’s appointment, or speak with your boss without asking. ALWAYS does these kinds of things without my consent. I work 12h a day everyday, im always tired, and i barely have money , and she “trying to take care of me “ will settle apointments for really expensive doctors witouth asking me if i even want, and will get mad at me when i tell her to cancel , saying im a big girl that i have to do it, SO i have to take out sometype of time during my busy work day to make a call to cancel something she settled without even asking me , and will be mad for weeks and take it out on me calling me names and shit. And if i dont accept her “ lending me the money for the apointment “ she will get mad and call me ungratfull and stupid. -Financial control. They might keep bank accounts in their name only and make you ask for money. You might be expected to account for every penny you spend. Well yeah.. dont even need to say anything here. - Lecturing. Belaboring your errors with long monologues makes it clear they think you’re beneath them.  Or here... -Direct orders. From “Get my dinner on the table now” to “Stop taking the pill,” orders are expected to be followed despite your plans to the contrary. This daily basis. -Outbursts. You were told to cancel that outing with your friend or put the car in the garage, but didn’t, so now you have to put up with a red-faced tirade about how uncooperative you are. Always calling me lazy and shit for not doing HER OWN STUFF. -Treating you like a child. They tell you what to wear, what and how much to eat, or which friends you can see.  I am 30 years old. -Feigned helplessness. They may say they don’t know how to do something. Sometimes it’s easier to do it yourself than to explain it. They know this and take advantage of it. Whatever happends she always plays the pity party card “ ahh im old” , “ ahhh i had an aneurism ( even tho she has been fine for two/three years now LOL )”, “ ahh my blood pressure “ She used that as an excuse to always ditch arguments or important discussions when she is loosing, and if i dont shut up she will threaten to kick me off the house or beat me. For example the other day she was shamming me out of nowhere from trying to commit suicide, and i told her she was one of the main reasons. She immediatly started to call me names, tried to hit me, and trow me out of the car. -Unpredictability. They’ll explode with rage out of nowhere, suddenly shower you with affection, or become dark and moody at the drop of a hat to keep you walking on eggshells. She flips randomly during the day, im afraid to leave my room. Or that she will enter my room. -They walk out. In a social situation, stomping out of the room leaves you holding the bag. At home, it’s a tool to keep the problem unresolved. She humiliates me in public then randomly walks out. -Using others. Abusers may tell you that “everybody” thinks you’re crazy or “they all say” you’re wrong. She likes to tell her friends and our family how “ irresponsable”, “immature” and no good for nothing i am, and how i am LEECHING her off... LOL -Jealousy. They accuse you of flirting or cheating on them. Usualy when i game or sometimes, ppl call me and talk to me, and she will eavesdropp my conversation and enter my room to hear better, or later wait until i leave the room , to complain about how i treat my friends so well , and speak so well to them , and how it is possible that i talk to her bad all the time and treat her like shit (? LOL ) Well for starters my friends dont misstreat me or call me names, or try to humiliate me or control me LOL or even pick fights with me. She will get mad at me for not wanting to spend time with her, and spending time with my friends. That im ungratefull and a bad daughter. LOL -Turning the tables. They say you cause their rage and control issues by being such a pain. This, that its my fault. That its my fault everything. - Denying something you know is true. An abuser will deny that an argument or even an agreement took place. This is called gaslighting. It’s meant to make you question your own memory and sanity. For example the other day , olso on the car, with the suicide attempt talk, i was trying to explain why and i told her my most painfull memory of her, was her beating me up for not knowing how to solve a math problem in 3rd grade. That she punched me several times because she tought i had awnsered 7 instead of 1. And she started yelling at me saying i made that up and shit. Like bitch i was afraid of doing my homework home because you would beat the crap out of me, instead of teatching me LOL. She once again used the “ blood pressure “ excuse and tried to hit me and kick me off the car in mid highway. -Using guilt. They might say something like, “You owe me this. Look at all I’ve done for you,” in an attempt to get their way. Ahh this is a classic. She says i owe her everything she asks for because SHE BIRTHED ME AND RAISED ME. And she used this argument to manipulate me in everything. -Goading then blaming. Abusers know just how to upset you. But once the trouble starts, it’s your fault for creating it. Yup -Denying their abuse. When you complain about their attacks, abusers will deny it, seemingly bewildered at the very thought of it. According to her, she just does everything she does because she cares LOL. -Accusing you of abuse. They say you’re the one who has anger and control issues and they’re the helpless victim. LOLOLOL cannot say this enought, SHE ACCUSES ME of being the abusive one , simply because i talk back, because i dont wanna be around her and because i fight with her LOL. Even tho she starts the fights and im just defending myself from her. -Trivializing. When you want to talk about your hurt feelings, they accuse you of overreacting and making mountains out of molehills. Yup -Saying you have no sense of humor. Abusers make personal jokes about you. If you object, they’ll tell you to lighten up. Yup -Blaming you for their problems. Whatever’s wrong in their life is all your fault. You’re not supportive enough, didn’t do enough, or stuck your nose where it didn’t belong.  ALSO YUP -Destroying and denying. They might crack your cell phone screen or “lose” your car keys, then deny it. Tried to break my things numerous of times, or trash them or give them away. Wich she did. -Demanding respect. No perceived slight will go unpunished, and you’re expected to defer to them. But it’s a one-way street. Yup... She will  happly tell me how to dress saying what im wearing is ugly, i will politely tell her to stop, she will continue to give her “opinion” i will get tired and yell to stop , she will immediatly demand respect and tell me i have no right to talk back at her and that im disrespectfull and stupid. -Shutting down communication. They’ll ignore your attempts at conversation in person, by text, or by phone. Yup -Dehumanizing you. They’ll look away when you’re talking or stare at something else when they speak to you. Yup -Keeping you from socializing. Whenever you have plans to go out, they come up with a distraction or beg you not to go. Also Yup She wouldnt let me go out if i didnt do my bed, and would make up shit just so i wouldnt go out, until i got tired and gave up. -Trying to come between you and your family. They’ll tell family members that you don’t want to see them or make excuses why you can’t attend family functions. Well she constantly came in between my first real good therapist. I was finally seeing  a good therapist a few years ago. I was finally relieved and tought i could trust him, all of a suddent she demanded to be in the therapy sessions. So in the sessions instead of talking about what upset me and her constant mental abuse, the therapist gave in to her demands, and started adressing HER issues with me. I remenber the LAST time i decided to attend the doctor. He would first attend my mom , then me. So i came up, and he started his usual talks, and i wanted to talk to him that day about the nightmares i was having and if he could help me. And all of a suddent he cut the conversation off by saying “ ah wait so your mother tells be you have been staying a lot of time on your computer “ “ that you dont socialize with your friends and that you dont go out “ I mean i wonder why i get stuck in my pc and dont go out with my friends LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL She would always cut me off from meeting my friends, she would always control me, so i had less interest or courage to make friends year by year. And gaming was the only thing that brought me joy in my shitty depressed life coz i couldnt develop any interests. -Withholding affection. They won’t touch you, not even to hold your hand or pat you on the shoulder. They may refuse sexual relations to punish you or to get you to do something. She wil straight up give me the cold shoulder, ignore me if she is mad because i didnt do something how she wanted. When i had hand surgery, she refused to go with me, or get me. By me it was ok , she didnt need to go or anything. So after surgery i told the doctors i would take myself home, and why. And they didnt allowe me and still called my mom even thought i told them she wouldnt. She treated me so badly after picking me up from the hospital because they called her. -Tuning you out. They’ll wave you off, change the subject, or just plain ignore you when you want to talk about your relationship. Yup -Actively working to turn others against you. They’ll tell co-workers, friends, and even your family that you’re unstable and prone to hysterics. YUP -Calling you needy. When you’re really down and out and reach out for support, they’ll tell you you’re too needy or the world can’t stop turning for your little problems.  YUP -Interrupting. You’re on the phone or texting and they get in your face to let you know your attention should be on them. Yup -Indifference. They see you hurt or crying and do nothing. Yup - Disputing your feelings. Whatever you feel, they’ll say you’re wrong to feel that way or that’s not really what you feel at all. Yup
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musicalmatrix · 7 years ago
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Flaws in Dear Evan Hansen
Requested by @youll-rise-again 
Kind of also a response to @evanhcnsen @hellagaysaltsquad @havenous 
And the anons
And anyone else who wants to fight (I can’t believe I’m wasting my data on y'all.) 
First off, I want to get out of the way that I actually enjoy this musical. The music is great and the cast is phenomenal. But that doesn’t mean I’m not ready to call out the bullshit, so buckle up. 
FIRST AND FOREMOST: Every time I say this musicals plot is problematic, everyone tells me it’s because “the written summary makes it sound worse than it is; the dialogue makes it way better.” To which I have two responses: The first is I have watched the bootleg so I know the dialogue. The second is if you plot sounds problematic, but the dialogue “makes it better”, that is the dialogue manipulating you to overlook the fact that the plot is STILL PROBLEMATIC. 
So let’s get into why the plot is problematic, and we’ll start with basics. There is something that should rub everyone the wrong way about someone pretending to be friends with someone who committed suicide and profiting from it. I am not saying that Evan didn’t have good intentions or anything. I understand why he did it. I’m just saying. Inherently, it’s wrong. And it needs to be addressed.
I’m having a hard time deciding what order to put these in, but next I think I’m going to talk about Evan as a character. The first thing I’m gonna say is Ben Platt deserves Best Actor because of how well he portrays social anxiety. But that’s about where the good ends (at least for what I want to talk about). Evan Hansen is a flawed character. Extremely flawed, actually. Sure, he has good intentions and stuff, that’s great. But it doesn’t change the fact he lied to everyone and fucked them over. Big time. He fucked over Zoe by dating her after he lied about her brother. He fucked over the Murphy’s because let’s not forget all the hate they got from the world after Connor’s “suicide” note was released. He fucked over his friends by dragging them along into their lies and ignoring how they felt. And last but not least, he fucked over his mother by ditching her. Now you’re all pretty pissed now I’m sure. Here’s the thing: I don’t care. It’s one thing for Evan to fuck over everyone and then be held accountable. But give me one time in the show he is fucking held accountable. Just one time. He apologizes. And then it’s over. They just forgive him. Like he’s so precious and needed to be protected. No. Just no. A mental illness is not an excuse to fuck everyone over. Evan needs to be held accountable. They never release what he did to the public. They never do ANYTHING about what he did. And don’t give me this bullshit of “He learned his lesson and felt bad.” That’s not being accountable. That’s regretting making a pretty obvious mistake that backfired on him. Being accountable would be coming out to the world and saying he lied and taking whatever backlash comes from that because that’s what he put on the Murphy’s. Being accountable is fixing your mistake, no matter how much it will suck. It’ll be hard? Then you shouldn’t have profited from someone committing suicide. Having social anxiety is not an excuse to fuck everyone over and then not do a damn thing to fix it. Stop glorifying Evan. (And I know I’m going to get a lot of shit for this, so please just keep in mind that I would never let myself or any of my friends get away with this bullshit just because of our social anxiety. I sure as hell hope you wouldn’t either.)
So from there I’m going to go into Connor (with a touch on Zoe) and how not only the show but the fandom glorifies him as well. I’m saying this right now: Connor is trash, and I have no tolerance for glorifying him. I literally think I just heard people exploding as I wrote that. But y’all asked for problems, and I’m giving them to you. If you can’t acknowledge the problems with your own show, you are part of the problem. So let’s get into this. My main problem with Connor (and probably only one I’ll feel like touching on because it’s a big enough flaw) is that he is abusive. That’s right, he’s abusive. Not abused. A b u s i v e . Canonically: mentally and emotionally. Though I wouldn’t be surprised if it was physically as well. The proof? After Connor dies, Zoe states “Just because Connor isn’t punching through my door screaming that he’s going to kill me for no reason? That doesn’t mean that all the sudden we’re the fucking Brady Bunch.” I need you to read this very carefully: Even if you have a mental disorder, I will never condone, defend, or even waste my time in entertaining the idea of excusing this behavior. It is abuse. And it is awful. I have heard over and over again in this fandom that “Connor just needed love and attention and he would have be fine.” You know what? I don’t give a fuck about Connor. What about Zoe? Would she have been fine? Even if Connor had gotten better, would she ever been able to fully get over her brother threatening her life? Would she ever be able to trust him again? Would she ever get to a point in her life she believed without a single doubt that Connor would NEVER do it again? Those are the questions you should be asking. Connor Murphy is abusive trash and you’re right: he could have been alright and he deserved to be remembered. But he doesn’t deserve to be lied about. He doesn’t deserve to be worried about more than the people he destroyed. And he sure as hell does not deserve to be glorified.
So I’ve veered off the path of plot flaws and did some character flaws. Now I’m bringing it back to plot flaws, which we will begin with Zoe. Zoe was abused by Connor. When Connor dies, Zoe actually specifically sings a song about how she refuses to be upset about it, because that’s how awful Connor was to her. That kind of harm takes–if it’s even possible–years upon years of carefully rebuilding trust to get over. It does not take some stranger you’ve talked to maybe once in your life waltzing in and saying “Oh yeah, your brother thought you were great” ten minutes after your brother dies. If you think that is in even the realm of possibility, I have to tell you that you’re really fucking dense. A more realistic response to this would be “I don’t know who the fuck you think you are, but you were never on the other side of the door while he was screaming he was going to kill me. You never had to endure any of that. So I actually don’t appreciate you belittling my feelings and experiences by saying you knew him better than I did.”
Another huge flaw to this show (which has been pointed out time and time again) is everyone’s responses to finding out Evan lied. You’re seriously telling me that the Murphy’s don’t expose him? Or yell at him? Make him pay for the anguish he put them through? He literally further destroyed an already grieving family. And he’s not even going to get punished for it by them? That is completely unrealistic and honestly makes the story entirely less compelling. They literally coddle the person who has made their lives a living hell. And Evan’s mom? He’s been lying to her for like a year and making shitty life choices and using this poor grieving family to get away from her, and she just forgives him just like that? Listen, in my life, I have encountered too many toxic people to allow Evan to get away with this. Being suicidal is not an excuse and should not grant someone immediate forgiveness if they have hurt other people. It’s a hard lesson to learn in life that you honestly don’t want to learn. But for two years I had a friend that (I realize now) would emotionally and mentally abuse me, and any time I would get upset about it, she would tell me she was suicidal. And immediately, my feelings weren’t important anymore. And that probably did more damage to me mentally than almost anything else in my life: having to tell myself I was being selfish when somebody really hurt me. I realize that that is not exactly what Evan’s doing, but it’s the same concept. He made his mom feel like shit, and instead of taking responsibility for it and trying to make it up to her, she found out he was suicidal and suddenly she wasn’t allowed to be angry at him anymore. She had to forgive him immediately, even though he hurt her and she needed to express that.
My next point isn’t really with the plot, but just the show as whole. So the show has this whole “representing mental illness” thing going, but the more I think about it, the more that’s a hard sell for me. Ben Platt does an amazing job portraying it, but the show (as I’ve mentioned before) glorifies his character. I don’t know how many times I have to say this, but being mentally ill does not excuse horrible behaviors. And so what I want to touch on now is how the show doesn’t really represent mental illness as a whole, but rather glorifies one person with a mental illness. And to do that, I want to talk about Alana: my favorite character in this show. Now, I’ve already posted several things about Alana and her high-functioning anxiety. But her anxiety isn’t canonized, and that’s kind of what irks me. Alana portrays all the signs of every high-functioning person I know (and I lived in an Honors dorm and have all Honors friends in college, so I know a lot of high-functioning people and am one myself.) But never once in the show is it addressed or acknowledged. Hell, most people don’t know what the hell I’m talking about right now. But it’s there. It’s real. Alana is struggling as well. But we don’t focus on her, oh no. We only get to focus on her if it’s convenient to Evan. And sure, the writers may not have wanted to focus on her, or maybe they don’t even know they gave her high-functioning anxiety. But if that’s true, then Dear Evan Hansen is not a musical representing mental illness. It’s about a kid who happens to have anxiety. You don’t get to cherry pick what parts of mental illness you want to care about. If Dear Evan Hansen truly wanted to accurately portray mental illnesses, they wouldn’t glorify one and ignore the other.
Another thing about the show is that it’s whitewashed for absolutely no reason. I remember last year that this time, everyone was talking about how Hamilton revolutionized music theater. There would now be diversity. Crops would flourish. Everything would be amazing. And here we are a year later. Two POC nominated for Best Actor/Actress in Lead/Supporting Role, and they’re in the same category. Look at that. We’re worse than the Oscar’s. And the shitty thing is, it’s not because POC just weren’t nominated. It’s because POC simply weren’t in this season. Now, I’m not at all talking down all the people nominated. They’re all amazing at what they do and deserve to be nominated. I’m just saying. There is no reason for Dear Evan Hansen to be all white people (besides Alana, who is hated on almost constantly, so don’t even try to defend this show with her). And yet, here we are. It’s a little disappointing to think last year at this time, we were so excited for representation, but now we’re back to where we started. And I know I’m walking a fine line here because this probably sounds like I don’t appreciate this cast. But I do. I think the cast is fabulous. I just also think the show needs more representation. Because believe it or not, POC have mental illnesses and deserve to be represented as well. As a theater community, we can’t just say “Well, we have Hamilton, so now all of theater is diverse.” No. Most of theater is still very very white. And until we start acknowledging that, it will never change.
There’s literally so much more to touch on and maybe I’ll add onto this later, but I have one last thing I want to talk about right now. And that is the excuse that people are saying of “Dear Evan Hansen is supposed to be flawed.” In a way, you are correct. Dear Evan Hansen is supposed to be flawed in the way of “Is it morally okay to lie about someone who has committed suicide if everyone is better for it?” Which is why I didn’t talk about that much. Those types of flaws push your boundaries and make you really think. That’s supposed to be there. What’s not supposed to be there is everything else I’ve talked about. Evan never being held accountable is not an intentional flaw. Connor being glorified despite being abusive is not an intentional flaw. Zoe forgiving Connor because Evan tells her to is not an intentional flaw. Nobody being able to be upset with Evan because he’s coddled is not an intentional flaw. Ignoring an entire character with a mental illness is not an intentional flaw. Those are ignorant flaws. Those are things that should have been fixed. Those are unrealistic and potentially harmful things to put into your show.
In summary: You asked for an essay, you got a fucking essay. Like I said, I might add to this, but I’m tired and am going to bed now. You can love the show, go for it. I enjoy it too. But to suggest that the show is perfect and has absolutely no flaws? It’s ignorant and quite frankly, it’s annoying. This show is flawed. One would evan say “flawed as hell”. So with that, I’ll end with this. Dear Evan Hansen deserved to be nominated, no questions asked. Despite everything I talked about, it has some pretty strong qualities as well. It does not, however, deserve to win, because of all the flaws in the show that are clearly unaddressed. That might be harsh, but if you put a musical like this out into the world, you better make damn sure you did it right. That’s the responsibility you take when making something this important. And so I will not apologize for “being mean” or “nasty” to DEH. You can yell at me and call me a shitty person all you want. You can say I’m tearing the theater fandom apart. Fucking go for it. If that’s what I get for refusing to glorify something clearly problematic, then so be it. I’m not “hating” on the show because it’s not my “type”. The show has flaws. And a show with this many flaws should not win Best Musical. I’m sorry you can’t handle the reality of that.
P.S. I could write an entirely separate essay on how toxic y’all’s fandom is, but I’ll save that for another time.
P.P.S. Y’all can pretend not to see this. You can ignore everything I said here. You can stay in your little bubble and refuse to acknowledge the flaws. But all of us out here? We see it. We see the flaws. All of us. And we see you, ignoring them. Just a heads up.
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mortvivanthqs-blog · 6 years ago
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welcome to the outpost, violet lewis, we’re sure you’ll find the place accommodating. danielle campbell is now taken! please review our checklist and send in your account within twenty-four hours!
đŸĄ¶ OUT OF CHARACTER:
NAME: tee !
AGE: twenty-one.
TIMEZONE: aest (or gmt+10!!).
PRONOUNS: she/her.
đŸĄ¶ IN CHARACTER:
NAME: violet lewis.
FACE CLAIM: danielle campbell.
GENDER & PRONOUNS: cis!female, she/her.
BIRTHDAY: june 19th, 1997.
BIRTHPLACE: seattle, washington.
JOBS: medic.
KILL COUNT: one (she considers her mother’s death her fault).
ANYTHING ELSE: klfdjs hello i have No self control thank u
đŸĄ¶ BIOGRAPHY:
violet: unshrinking. she had always been a force of nature. relentless, iron-willed. she couldn’t be convinced the world wasn’t hers for the taking. the second of two children, violet was forever nipping at her older sister’s heels — desperate to be all grown up, big enough to walk and talk like the big kids. nine years her sister’s junior, violet had reason to feel left out. an accidental pregnancy, she was born into a family of ‘creatives’. her father a cartoonist, and her mother an art teacher. their household was rather unconventional; full of wind chimes, buckets of paint, crystals, and other miscellaneous ‘hippie crap’ — as violet so affectionately liked to call it. her parents were the softest kind of people, and that suited them well. but violet? violet was never soft.
the girl was remarkable. clever as the devil and twice as cunning, she spent her idle time outsmarting her parents and playing pranks on her older sister. she was a menace, in her younger years — but all she really craved was attention. attention from parents who, try as they may, just couldn’t relate to their youngest daughter. but violets older sister? oh, they doted on her. it was nobody’s fault, really. violet’s sister was a creative, just like their parents. whereas violet, she needed more mental stimulation. chewed up science textbooks for fun, spent hours down at the local natural history museum, and watched documentaries after school instead of cartoons. but to their credit, violet’s parents knew she was gifted. they did their best to keep up with her; but she was already leaps and bounds ahead.
violet didn’t keep many friends, as a child. kids at her school found her an easy target: bushy brows, strange parents, know-it-all tendencies. the latter was something she worked on improving, over the years, although the first two couldn’t be helped. over the years, violet taught herself how to brush it off — tried not to take things so personally. but years of trying to justify herself left her defensive, and suspicious of anyone being too overtly kind. in a word, you might call her pessimistic. but growing pains subsided, and she eventually grew out of her awkwarder of phases (thankfully). as she bloomed into her adolescence, violet even found herself gaining a little popularity — shock horror. after all, she was confident, intelligent, and as she would soon come to realise, beautiful. her latter years of high school were a breeze. she made friends, topped her classes, and kept her nose out of trouble. violet reasoned she didn’t have time for drinking, or boys, or partying. even at her parents insistence that she join in on the fun, she refused. after all, she was going to go to med school. she was going to be a doctor. that would be plenty fun enough for her.
after graduating high school, violet was offered a full ride to study medicine at one of the best universities in the country. she was born for this. so, never more eager to fly the nest, violet packed her bags and headed for baltimore. and that was it, she had made it: adulthood. out on her own for the first time, violet felt like she had the world at her feet. she was smart, and capable, and brilliant. perhaps a little sheltered, a little green – but tenacious none the less. she adored her studies, and devoted all her spare time to her school work. but her social life quickly fell by the wayside. violet failed to make herself new friends, never wanted to attend parties or social events, and the relationship with her family grew even more distant than before. she convinced herself she didn’t need anyone else — that she was her own best company. but deep down? violet was lonely. craved all those simple, normal things she missed out on when she was growing up; too busy trying to be brilliant. but still, she tried not to dwell. violet wasn’t overly fond of self-pity.
as it usually did, guilt dragged violet back to seattle for the weekend. she rarely visited, anymore. three years moved out, it often took several awkward calls from her mother to lure her back home. and washington was dismal, as far as violet was concerned. that’s what they got for living in one of the rainest cities in america. but, she would have to endure it for at least a few days, for the sake of her grandmother’s 95th birthday. violet spent most of the weekend locked away in her childhood bedroom, avoiding the festivities as best she could. even her older sister – who violet had once so adored and admired – was practically a stranger, by this point. she had expected the weekend to be one of the dullest of her life, but little did violet know, it would change her life forever.
everyone had heard the news reports. and violet found it fascinating, naturally. although, admittedly, she thought it was all a little silly — no doubt blown out of proportion. just like swine flu, and ebola, and all those other ‘pandemics’ that never came to be. it certainly didn’t scare her, that’s for sure. but then she got an email saying her flight back to maryland had been cancelled, in an attempt to quarantine the state. had things really gotten that bad? more so annoyed than anything, violet resigned herself to the fact that she would have to spend a few more days in her family home – ugh. but days turned to weeks, and things only escalated. still convinced it would all blow over, none of it felt real until martial law was declared. and all at once, things started to spiral. her parents insisted they bunker down and stay put, wait it out. but violet and her sister? for the first time in years, they agreed on something: they all needed to get the hell out of seattle. as chaos started enveloping the city, their window of opportunity started getting narrower and narrower; they needed to go. and so, finally, their parents agreed. and so, all four of them piled into an suv, and they headed east.
their first few weeks on the road were tough. finding food, clean water, encountering other survivors — survivors far more armed and able than they were. violet got her first few up close and personal encounters with the dead, the horror of which she found hard to comprehend. it was all so much, she kept hoping it was some nightmare she had dreamed up inside her head. but no, it was all too real. and violet, she wasn’t built for such a world. she didn’t know how to use a weapon, how to defend herself. hell, she’s 5â€Č2″ for god’s sake — she was barely allowed to ride a rollercoaster, let alone handle a gun. violet could be harsh, and stubborn, and insensitive, but she certainly wasn’t violent. she wasn’t faint of heart, but the first time she put down a walker, she couldn’t stop herself throwing up. but the worst, unimaginably, was still to come.
first, they lost her mother. not to the undead, but to illness. a wound gone septic, violet did all she could. but they had no medicine, no clean water, no food. living amongst the dirt, and the rot of a dying world. violet blames herself, for not being able to save her mother — she’s sure her sister blames her, too. she was supposed to be the great big medical student, after all. if she could do nothing else, surely she could do this. but still, she couldn’t stop her mother from slipping away. her mother as well, was the first person violet saw turn. up until that point, she was convinced a person had to be bitten — that’s what they all thought, and yet. violet’s sister put her mother (or what was left of her) down, and they buried her somewhere peaceful. their father’s death came only three weeks later, his demise far quicker and more violent. caught amongst a horde, he got surrounded. all violet and her sister could do was flee, tear stained and trembling. after that, all they had left was each other. two against the world.
violet and her sister all but tore each other apart, those first few weeks on the road alone. so disagreeable, so set in their ways, compromise seemed impossible. and grieving, the both of them, in staggeringly different ways. violet on one hand, shut down. refused to talk about it, put on her toughest, bravest face; interrupted by the occasional outburst of emotion. whereas her sister grieved out loud — wanted to talk about it, needed a shoulder to cry on. incompatible to their core, seemingly. but still, despite the strain and the heartache, they loved each other; needed each other. what else did they have left, after all? half the battle was getting to know each other all over again. the people they had missed out on getting to know, during their years apart. tensions never entirely faded, but the pair managed to build a few bridges — eventually learning to tolerate each other’s company, even if only some of the time.
after spending time with a few small groups that quickly dissolved, the pair decided the only real option they had was to go it alone. after all, how were they supposed to trust anybody else, anymore? on this, violet and her sister both agreed: they would steer clear of other survivors at all costs. until that is, they met landon scott’s crew. caught amongst a swarm, violet and her sister were quickly losing control of the horde: overwhelmed. but suddenly, a small group flocked to their aid — no doubt saving their lives. to repay the debt, violet offered to help patch up on of the survivors that had been injured in the fight, which ended in her and her sister being brought back to the warehouse. it was a better established base than they had seen in months, and the group (as motley of a crew as they were) were clearly able. therein, they were offered a proposition: if you’re willing to work, you’re welcome to stay. and so, somewhat reluctantly, the pair agreed.
violet is no hardened survivor, nor was she built for such a world. but she’s determined, iron-willed, unwilling to fail. refusing to give up. she bottles her fears, of which there are plenty, and replaces her worry with a stoney facade. she can come off as cold, sometimes. blunt, sarcastic, unconcerned with pleasantries. but that’s the only way violet knows how to cope. if she is to survive, she needs to guard herself closely — maintain the ridged veneer. she knows her sister worries about her, wishes she would talk to her more, but violet is stubborn. she offers valuable assistance as a medic, but she still feels useless when it comes to fighting the undead. she’s learning, of course – teaching herself. one on one, she can take down a walker decently enough, but once they start grouping up? violet panics, gets overwhelmed. compared to some of the other, more skilled fighters amongst their ranks? she feels pathetic.
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hxuijzgophf-blog · 5 years ago
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asqaaxahutll-blog · 5 years ago
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Encountering customer reviews on the show collection and App growth will paint a comparative picture. They raise discretionary names and scramble them stirring once you check straightaway who views my Instagram. Likewise, an advancement will jump can you see who views your instagram occurring at everyday interims. Would I have the unorthodox to see who seen my Instagram? The excuse that such applications cant pursue the profile visitors is fundamental. The Instagram API doesnt allow such recommendation to outcast applications for how to look who viewed your Instagram video. while a few applications complete ventilate who unfollowed (or sought after) you starting late, creating the make known of your profile visitor is mentioning unreasonably. The Instagram API doesnt offer such counsel to pariah applications. In addition, nobody can in reality say how these applications handle your data and anew there is question hitting in your mind that who saying my Instagram.Instagram tab Views. even if you cannot look who views your profile or individual posts, you can see who views your Instagram stories. Stories were other to Instagram in 2016, and have past become wildly popular, surpassing the usage of the original story-sharing app by can I see who viewed my Instagram? Snapchat. If someone views your story, which is forlorn shared for 24 hours, you can say by checking the list of viewers. Instagram credit Views Order. Now that you know who has viewed your story, you may be wondering what the order of that list means. Many users are excited very nearly the order of aficionado and bearing in mind lists, likes, and balance views, as it is usually distinct that the order is not chronological. The perfect bill for the order of these lists is not unconditionally clear, but we know that it every goes encourage to the Instagram algorithm. who you engage similar to the most can you see who views your instagram on Instagram will likely appear at the top of the list, which is why you often look your closest friends or buddies as the first spectators upon the list. Who Stalking My Instagram? consequently you cant see definitively who visits your Instagram profile, but is there a mannerism to figure out your stalkers? Sadly, plus no although there is more room for notes upon this question. The Instagram Algorithm shows you posts and orders your cronies and likes based on three factors: your interests, your relationships, and reference. total how useful these applications are, I question they are even secure. In the occasion that youve offered entry to such applications beforehand, create a reduction to repudiate the passageway quickly, paying little mind to whether you dont use them any more or have uninstalled them from your phone.
Get This About
Open attributed online instruments of Instagram page later than IG Apers upon your program and it will deny the allow youve unadulterated to any such suspicious applications. In the thing that youre still never going to budge on in the manner of your visitors, the now-pervasive Instagram stories feature is the best mannerism to pact similar to complete every things considered, in the past the stories posted by read archives are accessible to with reference to everyone (aside from on the off unplanned that they are impeded from breakdown it). You should basically edit a report and swipe up. click on the eyeball image and the once-over of people who have visited your savings account will be appeared. This joins customers who arent gone your Instagram account. You have the marginal to see who points of who views my Instagram profiles chronicles? In quick you can for that our site will realize accordingly. If you see someone loathsome, a tap upon the tiny irate image (close by the name) will deter the person from chemical analysis your far along Instagram Stories. Or after that again, you may change to a private photograph album if you hope to keep your private data private. Physically checking the Instagram Stories normally could be aggravating. In any case, that is the primary way, in any occasion until new notice.Instagram assumes that those you interact in imitation of the most interest you the most, and they want to save you enthusiastic and spending time upon their app. The users should correct their Instagram privacy settings. If youre really anxious just about who is viewing your Instagram, you can bend your privacy settings correspondingly that single-handedly those youve certified can you see who views your instagram can look your posts. If your Instagram is set to public, anyone can view your posts and stories unless youve blocked someone specifically. Going private on Instagram can negatively impact engagement, as your posts wont be visible to anyone who doesnt follow you already. behind your Instagram set to private you still wont know which of your followers is stalking you, but at least youll know that strangers cant see at your photos. Insights reveals how many people have viewed your posts and breaks the length of demographics later than age, gender, and location of followers.See who views your Instagramand check out how many impressions were made upon each post, as skillfully as how many people liked, commented, shared, or saved it. though you cant see which specific buddies viewed your profile or each post, you can look the numbers to greater than before gauge your attain on Instagram and use that instruction to adjoin engagement and gain Instagram followers.
Conclusion
There is a basic methodology set taking place which would permit you to see the names of your profile visitors to know who viewed my Instagram. By and by, not genuine complexity for anyone to bust your Instagram stalkers. in fact given it here bearing in mind couple of basic advances showing off to how to see who views your instagram look who viewed my Instagram profile.Strike the toggle to switch your account from public to private, or from private to public you nevertheless cannot look exactly who views your posts or profile, unfortunately. You can, however, see how many users have viewed your publicize through Instagram Insights They are to remain a puzzle and which is just fine. In feat be revolted by someone else to understand that youve visited their profile (say, your ex). Therefore, at all point intrigue gives indications of encroachment of you, you know not to trust in the pariah applications.
0 notes
hbgkjuedaoai-blog · 5 years ago
Text
Easy Guidelines To Who Viewed My Instagram Video Easly
If you are dead earsplitting in in the same way as your visitors and checking who proverb your Instagram profile, how to see who points of view your Instagram feature is the best way to harmony in the same way as attain in that capacity, in the past the stories posted by way in how to see who views your instagram records are accessible to approximately everyone how to see who viewed your Instagram profile video. You can find your put to rest profile watcher. acquire it on our forgive online gadgets. Most of these applications allow off an vent of innate work and they commonly pick discretionary Instagram names and raise a fuss the proportionate to you. take it or not, some of them even solicitation that you pay a humble amount of child maintenance in charge you have to find more than five names.
Can You See Who Views Your Instagram Videos
Encountering customer reviews upon the function growth and App deposit will paint a comparative picture. They raise discretionary names and scramble them happening in imitation of you check straightaway who views my Instagram. Likewise, an advancement will jump can you see who views your instagram videos going on at indistinctive interims. Would I have the unconventional to see who seen my Instagram? The excuse that such applications cant pursue the profile visitors is fundamental. The Instagram API doesnt provide such suggestion to outcast applications for how to look who viewed your Instagram video. even if a few applications reach look who unfollowed (or sought after) you starting late, creating the proclaim of your profile visitor is mentioning unreasonably. The Instagram API doesnt give such opinion to pariah applications. In addition, nobody can in fact tell how these applications handle your data and once more there is question hitting in your mind that who proverb my Instagram.Instagram bill Views. even if you cannot see who views your profile or individual posts, you can see who views your Instagram stories. Stories were extra to Instagram in 2016, and have since become wildly popular, surpassing the usage of the native story-sharing app by can I look who viewed my Instagram? Snapchat. If someone views your story, which is abandoned shared for 24 hours, you can say by checking the list of viewers. Instagram report Views Order. Now that you know who has viewed your story, you may be wondering what the order of that list means. Many users are enthusiastic virtually the order of aficionado and later lists, likes, and bill views, as it is usually definite that the order is not chronological. The precise tally for the order of these lists is not extremely clear, but we know that it every goes help to the Instagram algorithm. who you engage taking into consideration the most who viewed my instagram on Instagram will likely appear at the top of the list, which is why you often look your closest associates or followers as the first spectators on the list. Who Stalking My Instagram? so you cant look definitively who visits your Instagram profile, but is there a showing off to figure out your stalkers? Sadly, next no although there is more room for interpretation upon this question. The Instagram Algorithm shows you posts and orders your buddies and likes based upon three factors: your interests, your relationships, and reference. final how useful these applications are, I ask they are even secure. In the occasion that youve offered right of entry to such applications beforehand, make a lessening to repudiate the path quickly, paying tiny mind to whether you dont use them any more or have uninstalled them from your phone.
Firstly,New One Introduction
Open approved online instruments of Instagram page in the manner of IG Apers on your program and it will deny the allow youve unchangeable to any such suspicious applications. In the issue that youre yet never going to budge upon later than your visitors, the now-pervasive Instagram stories feature is the best habit to settlement as soon as attain every things considered, in the past the stories posted by entrance records are accessible to on the subject of everyone (aside from on the off unintended that they are impeded from examination it). You should basically read a bill and swipe up. click on the eyeball image and the once-over of people who have visited your checking account will be appeared. This joins customers who arent past your Instagram account. You have the different to look who points of who views my Instagram profiles chronicles? In short you can for that our site will get accordingly. If you look someone loathsome, a tap upon the tiny livid image (close by the name) will deter the person from psychiatry your higher Instagram Stories. Or after that again, you may tweak to a private stamp album if you hope to save your private data private. Physically checking the Instagram Stories normally could be aggravating. In any case, that is the primary way, in any occasion until extra notice.Instagram assumes that those you interact later the most raptness you the most, and they want to save you interested and spending get older on their app. The users should fiddle with their Instagram privacy settings. If youre in point of fact anxious not quite who is viewing your Instagram, you can correct your privacy settings consequently that by yourself those youve credited how to see who viewed your instagram video can look your posts. If your Instagram is set to public, anyone can view your posts and stories unless youve blocked someone specifically. Going private upon Instagram can negatively impact engagement, as your posts wont be visible to anyone who doesnt follow you already. subsequently your Instagram set to private you still wont know which of your followers is stalking you, but at least youll know that strangers cant look at your photos. Insights reveals how many people have viewed your posts and breaks next to demographics behind age, gender, and location of followers.See who views your Instagramand check out how many impressions were made on each post, as with ease as how many people liked, commented, shared, or saved it. even if you cant look which specific associates viewed your profile or each post, you can see the numbers to improved gauge your reach upon Instagram and use that information to adjoin raptness and get Instagram followers.
Final Words
There is a basic methodology set taking place which would allow you to look the names of your profile visitors to know who viewed my Instagram. By and by, not genuine profundity for anyone to bust your Instagram stalkers. really given it here similar to couple of basic advances pretension to who viewed my instagram look who viewed my Instagram profile.Strike the toggle to switch your account from public to private, or from private to public you nevertheless cannot see exactly who views your posts or profile, unfortunately. You can, however, look how many users have viewed your name through Instagram Insights They are to remain a puzzle and which is just fine. In war loathe someone else to comprehend that youve visited their profile (say, your ex). Therefore, at all dwindling intrigue gives indications of move forward of you, you know not to trust in the pariah applications.
0 notes
hxugwaqzavwj-blog · 5 years ago
Text
3 Little Tricks To Know How To See Who Viewed Your Instagram Story Must
If you are dead enormous in like your visitors and checking who maxim your Instagram profile, how to look who points of view your Instagram feature is the best exaggeration to harmony in the manner of pull off in that capacity, before the stories posted by get into who views my instagram history are accessible to nearly everyone how to look who viewed your Instagram profile video. You can locate your assuage profile watcher. acquire it upon our clear online gadgets. Most of these applications come up with the money for off an circulate of being conduct yourself and they commonly choose discretionary Instagram names and disturb the proportionate to you. agree to it or not, some of them even solicitation that you pay a mortify amount of child maintenance in battle you have to locate more than five names.
Who Views My Instagram
Encountering customer reviews upon the ham it up accrual and App buildup will paint a comparative picture. They raise discretionary names and scramble them in the works in imitation of you check straightaway who views my Instagram. Likewise, an advancement will hop who viewed my instagram video in the works at unnamed interims. Would I have the another to see who seen my Instagram? The excuse that such applications cant pursue the profile visitors is fundamental. The Instagram API doesnt manage to pay for such information to outcast applications for how to look who viewed your Instagram video. even if a few applications get melody who unfollowed (or sought after) you starting late, creating the herald of your profile visitor is mentioning unreasonably. The Instagram API doesnt pay for such counsel to pariah applications. In addition, nobody can in reality tell how these applications handle your data and once again there is ask hitting in your mind that who motto my Instagram.Instagram financial credit Views. even though you cannot look who views your profile or individual posts, you can look who views your Instagram stories. Stories were bonus to Instagram in 2016, and have past become wildly popular, surpassing the usage of the indigenous story-sharing app by can I look who viewed my Instagram? Snapchat. If someone views your story, which is unaided shared for 24 hours, you can tell by checking the list of viewers. Instagram bank account Views Order. Now that you know who has viewed your story, you may be wondering what the order of that list means. Many users are enthusiastic practically the order of devotee and afterward lists, likes, and credit views, as it is usually clear that the order is not chronological. The perfect bank account for the order of these lists is not totally clear, but we know that it every goes urge on to the Instagram algorithm. who you engage past the most can you see who views your instagram on Instagram will likely appear at the top of the list, which is why you often see your closest friends or cronies as the first viewers on the list. Who Stalking My Instagram? hence you cant look definitively who visits your Instagram profile, but is there a habit to figure out your stalkers? Sadly, plus no although there is more room for observations upon this question. The Instagram Algorithm shows you posts and orders your buddies and likes based on three factors: your interests, your relationships, and reference. utter how useful these applications are, I ask they are even secure. In the occasion that youve offered access to such applications beforehand, make a narrowing to repudiate the alleyway quickly, paying little mind to whether you dont use them any more or have uninstalled them from your phone.
Learn From Definition
Open official online instruments of Instagram page taking into account IG Apers upon your program and it will deny the ascend youve answer to any such suspicious applications. In the matter that youre nevertheless never going to budge upon past your visitors, the now-pervasive Instagram stories feature is the best pretentiousness to treaty later than realize all things considered, previously the stories posted by retrieve archives are accessible to as regards everyone (aside from on the off unplanned that they are impeded from psychotherapy it). You should basically admission a balance and swipe up. click on the eyeball image and the once-over of people who have visited your financial credit will be appeared. This joins customers who arent in the same way as your Instagram account. You have the complementary to see who points of who views my Instagram profiles chronicles? In immediate you can for that our site will attain accordingly. If you see someone loathsome, a tap upon the tiny furious image (close by the name) will deter the person from psychotherapy your complex Instagram Stories. Or then again, you may fiddle with to a private sticker album if you wish to save your private data private. Physically checking the Instagram Stories normally could be aggravating. In any case, that is the primary way, in any occasion until extra notice.Instagram assumes that those you interact as soon as the most incorporation you the most, and they desire to save you impatient and spending grow old on their app. The users should bend their Instagram privacy settings. If youre truly worried roughly who is viewing your Instagram, you can amend your privacy settings as a result that and no-one else those youve official can you see who views your instagram videos can look your posts. If your Instagram is set to public, anyone can view your posts and stories unless youve blocked someone specifically. Going private upon Instagram can negatively impact engagement, as your posts wont be visible to anyone who doesnt follow you already. behind your Instagram set to private you still wont know which of your partners is stalking you, but at least youll know that strangers cant see at your photos. Insights reveals how many people have viewed your posts and breaks all along demographics later age, gender, and location of followers.See who views your Instagramand check out how many impressions were made upon each post, as competently as how many people liked, commented, shared, or saved it. even though you cant look which specific associates viewed your profile or each post, you can see the numbers to better gauge your attain upon Instagram and use that assistance to complement raptness and gain Instagram followers.
Conclusion
There is a basic methodology set up which would permit you to see the names of your profile visitors to know who viewed my Instagram. By and by, not real obscurity for anyone to bust your Instagram stalkers. in reality firm it here taking into account couple of basic advances way to how to see who viewed your instagram look who viewed my Instagram profile.Strike the toggle to switch your account from public to private, or from private to public you yet cannot look exactly who views your posts or profile, unfortunately. You can, however, look how many users have viewed your state through Instagram Insights They are to remain a puzzle and which is just fine. In skirmish be revolted by someone else to understand that youve visited their profile (say, your ex). Therefore, at whatever lessening intrigue gives indications of develop of you, you know not to trust in the pariah applications.
0 notes
decadentrpg-blog · 6 years ago
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WELCOME ALLIE, YOU’VE BEEN ACCEPTED FOR THE ROLE OF NATASSIA PRINCE
Admins Note: A tough choice to make but I must say your application embodies so much of the Natassia that I see. From her sense of self identity to her motivations, it’s all so cohesive. The origins of her birth are nicely crafted! Seeing how much money she’s spent and the accumulation of possible debt she’ll owe was another nice touch to Natassia’s character. Seeing her interaction with Cassiel and Maxima really amplified her presence. Your request to use Ni Ni has been approved. Congratulations on your acceptance again, please make sure to head your way to the checklist and submit your account within the next 24 hours!
Out of Character
Name / Alias: Allie Pronouns: She/Her Age: 23 Timezone: CST
In Character Application
Full Name: Natassia Li Prince
NATASSIA (na-tas-sia) – Natassia derives from Greece meaning “born at Christmas”. Sadly the meaning really has nothing to do with the reason behind why she was named Natassia, especially since she was, in fact, not born at Christmas. There is no grand meaning behind the reason her parents chose the name. Really, Natassia was a last minute pick since they couldn’t settle on anything else. It once belonged to a relative on her pure side of the family, thankfully. Someone from the distant past she never made and whose stories aren’t ever told and yet now they were her namesake. She would make this name her own, after all the Princes never had a half-blood in their line before.
LI (lee) – If her mother had her way, Natassia’s name would have been Jia Li, a name meaning “pretty, beautiful” in Chinese. Instead, her parents settled for a completely different name, and kept Li for her middle name. Really, she hasn’t revealed her middle name in such a long time. Few know it, even fewer dare call her by her full name. Her middle name is just something she wouldn’t mind leaving out as it’s just a reminder of her mother’s Muggle-ness.
PRINCE (PRINS) – Her surname is the name that she says with pride. Prince has a meaning of royalty, really meaning “royal son, first, prince”. The origin goes back to Old English and it’s something that she prides herself with. Prince holds the name of a pureblood family that her father belongs to, and even with that being her surname, she still fights to be part of. The Prince family may not turn their backs after her father came crawling back with three year old Natassia in tow but they certainly didn’t hold their disapproval of their half-blood granddaughter.
Sexuality: Bisexual Gender/Pronouns: Cisfemale & she/her Hogwarts House: Slytherin
Head canons:
A FAMILY’S DISGRACE – Pure. That’s all you ever wanted to be. But with your father’s disgrace leading your family down a path you had no choice to be on, pure was just a grasp away. And the woman that was responsible, a muggle of all people, disappeared into the night on your third birthday. Not that you cared. You should have thought yourself lucky when your father’s family, the best side of you, never turned their backs on your father, letting him keep the claim of pure without acknowledging that short term relationship. However, damage was done because you were a product of your father’s horrendous actions leaving you to deal with ugly names and disappointing glances from not only strangers but the very people meant to be family. Your father didn’t put a stop to any of it but rather dotted you with gifts, something you grew to demand as you grew older. Even then, you might look the part of a pureblood doll, you can never forget that you aren’t one. You will pave your path and take everything that belongs to you. That you deserve.
PIGFARTS PIGFARTS HERE I COME – You never felt nervous about what house you belong to in Hogwarts. After all, there was only one that you would even consider being respectable. Gryffindors were full of overzealous fools, Hufflepuffs spend too much time building world peace. Ravenclaw wouldn’t have been the worst choice, possibly the second best, however you weren’t too keen on the idea of being surrounded by people who think they can outwit you. No, no. You had no doubt that you belonged in Slytherin and when the hat confirmed what you already knew, you just felt validated. However, even there you find yourself being forced to prove that you belong. So you did, you continue to do. You go after what you want, even if that means the hard glares or loud whispers. It’s not like you haven’t dealt with those before and you never let that stop you.
A STORY OF LOVE LOST AND LOVE FOUND – That’s what this is; a story. Something that one day you will look back on and smile as you are seated next to the one your heart belongs to. Perhaps things might have been different if you were pure and you are too aware of the obstacles placed in front of you but none of them matters as long as you have Cassiel. The secret glances, the hidden touches were just the beginning of what you would do for him. You will fight for him and you truly believe that it’s the same for him. You tried to keep the relationship secret, on his behalf of course, but eventually she found out. You were never a big fan of Rosier. After all, she had everything handed to her. Never worked an ounce in her life to be given the treatment that you deserve. And now she also has his hand in marriage which adds to the list of reasons why the sound of her name fills your with anger – no, no, not anger – resentment. You didn’t exactly mean for her to find out the love you have for Cassiel but it’s in the open now. Even though the affair was brought to her attention, you aren’t backing away from him. After all, she doesn’t deserve him, and you are the one who loves him. Part of you almost feels bad but then you remember that she has everything that you desire and that moment quickly passes. Things will work out, this is something you truly believe.
BEAUTY LIES IN HER EYES AND IT’S EXPENSIVE – The gifts your father gave you in order to make up for the life you will never have gave you an ounce hope. Hope one day you really will be the pureblood you need to become. The gifts were a way for you to look the part you desire. But they would never be enough. You crave for more than just some plain pair of earrings, no, no. You need more than just that and that consumed you. Sure, some may say that you have a spending problem but really don’t you deserve the very best? What you didn’t think was the amount you spend on a daily would start to eat away at your inheritance. This problem would have appeared much sooner if you didn’t request your father to setup your inheritance after you spoke of traveling, you might have been out of money in two days. As of now, you aren’t too worried about what’s left in your vault. That is, you aren’t even aware of how much you have. If you do encounter a problem, a letter home to father dearest may turn that around. After all, you are his little girl and heruined the life you were destined to have with such a small mishap.
PATRONUS vs. BOGGART – Your deepest fear and your greatest memory. Both send you chills down your back but for very different reasons. Your boggart is clear as day when you become face to face with it. You see yourself with nothing, not even a name to claim – failure written on your face. It is clear to you that the boggart you doesn’t belong anywhere, with nobody. Loneliness consumes the boggart you before you can vanish it away. This fear can manifest itself outside of the boggart with nightmares of the one you care most leaving you behind, spitting out harmful words that you would not have cared if it came from anyone else. In your nightmares, even he hurts you. But you wake up and realize that was a dream. And dreams don’t become reality. Your favorite memory also involves Cassiel, but in a better light, one filled with reality. The first time they met, in secret that is. The shared smiles throughout the night and forbidden hands running down your side sending shivers down your back. This memory was never topped, really it was just repeated.
WELCOME TO AMERICA – Leaving behind Great Britain was something that you considered doing for quite a long time. You don’t feel bad about leaving behind your family, not even your little cousins. After all, you were never truly part of this family were you? Your father tried, sure, but his silence when words of disgrace were being spoken was enough for you to realize that you weren’t going to be enough. Gifts can only go so far. You needed some air, a place where you can truly belong and staying in Great Britain was hindering that. There were too many memories, too many doubts of who you are and you were tired of that. A fresh start somewhere else, anywhere else had to do you some good. Sure, this might not be your father’s favorite idea of you being so far from home but throwing aside family was what your family does best. Instead, he gave you money, an allowance really, to help you get to America, to settle. It almost felt like he was begging you to remember him, remember to write. Something that you haven’t done since your feet landed in new soil. Perhaps one day you’ll return, but not until you have everything that you desire, not until you have the guy.
WORDS HURT – You keep a brave face on even after a dinner with your family as your grandfather goes on and on about how you will be attending Hogwarts soon, how you should keep your blood a secret. After all, a half-blood Prince was not a good look for this family and if you are going to stay, then you must play pretend. You keep a brave face on even when your grandmother mentions that no matter how hard you pretend, you will still be part Muggle. No matter how much magic you learn, no matter how much you act, you won’t be worthy of the Prince name. You keep a brave face on even when your dorm mate discovers a letter written to you from your father, one that reveals the heritage that you promised to keep secret. He wrote to you out of concern but he was the one to put you in flames. You keep a brave face on as whispers are woven throughout the halls, inside the classrooms. Dirty blood is something you just snicker at, they don’t see the word pounding inside your head as your face never falters. You ignore the names, the words, the judgement because you know that everything they have said will never hurt you for you will prove them all wrong. All the while, you keep a brave face on. Until you make it home. Until you make your room soundproof. Until you know you are truly alone. Then you scream. You scream and you scream and you scream until you can’t scream anymore. Then, you put your brave face back on and reapply your lipstick. Not a hair out of place. You won’t let them hear your screams, you won’t let them see their words scribbled on parchment paper over and over again as a way to get it all out of your system. No one will ever see that weakness, no one will see the pain you hide.
In Character Paragraph:
What can she say? She looks damn good in her new dress. The skirt came just an inch below her knees, a little higher than normal but what can she say? She does enjoy the attention she gains when heads turn to look at her, but there is one person’s eyes that she is looking for. Lips in the deepest shade of scarlet she had, eyes layered with eyeliner in order to appear much darker. Her appearance had to be perfect with where she planned on heading that night, with who she planned on seeing. It didn’t matter that he might be there with another woman, that was just a slight setback. If anything, at least she’ll be the one catching his eye.
Natassia took one last look at herself in the mirror, making sure that not a single hair was out of place, a hand smoothing down her dress. Let eyes turn her way, let whispers of want escape the lips of men she will never look at twice. All of that will just reassure her that she’s bound to be the best looking in the club. And with those last looks, Natassia grabbed her fur coat and headed out the door.
The walk towards the club was a short one and if the night was cooler, she might have just apparated there. Thankfully, the club was strictly for witches and wizards, if they allowed unworthy of being around people far greater than themselves in there, she would just have to stop going. Luckily that was not happening anytime soon.
She got to the door, knocked twice before a goblin appeared at the window. With a grunt, he spoke, “ Password. ”
Ah yes, another good thing about this place. She loved the secrecy, the exclusion that this underground club commanded. Password changes every day but if you know the right people, you know the right words.
“ Nebulus. ”
Another grunt and the doors open and music fills her ears. She steps into the foyer as the room grows much larger than it looks on the outside. Magic really does such wonderful things. Natassia finds herself grabbing a glass of champagne as soon as she spotted an elf in handing them out and took a sip as her eyes scour the room looking for one particular person.
He shouldn’t be too hard to find. After all, even in a room of thousands, she will always find him. And as she was moving through the crowd, she spots the only one who matters and her. It was a bit disappointing to see the dutiful wife in his arms. If only little Rosier knew what she knew but no, Natassia will not do that to Cassiel. She’s not going to be the reason his wife discovers what they do when her back is turned. It’s almost a bit sad, after all, the poor thing doesn’t exactly deserve this. Really, Maxima Rosier doesn’t deserve anything that was just given to her but she didn’t come to this club to curse the girl’s name tonight. She came for him and she’ll be damn if she doesn’t catch his attention.
Natassia set the empty glass down. There was no backing down. She moved closer to closer to the lovely couple, accidentally bumping into Maxima causing her drink to spill. Collateral damage, that’s what the drink was. That’s what she is and Natassia has to remember that.
“ Oh! I’m so sorry dear. Forgive me. Here, let me clean you up! ” Sugary sweet, that’s what she had to be, in order to avoid suspicion. As she looks at the younger girl again, Natassia wonders just how much out there that the poor thing doesn’t know.
Natassia quickly pulled out her wand, pointed at the dear’s dress before stating the simple spell, “ Scourgify. ” Once she was satisfied that everything was clear, Natassia glanced over the couple before letting out an exclamation, “ Cassiel Lestrange? It’s so good to see you again! ” She turned to look between the two of them, taking note of Maxima’s confused look. “ We are very old friends back when we were still at Hogwarts. I’m Natassia Prince and you must be his lovely wife, Maxima. ”
She extends her hand with a smile as the other took it, meeting that smile. “ We will have to catch up soon Cassiel, and of course, I would love to get to you know better, Maxima. ” No, no she wouldn’t. But she plastered that smile on like her life depended on it. “I shall leave the two of you alone. I hope you have a wonderful time here! It really was nice meeting you Maxima. ” A wave goodbye and a smile in Cassiel’s direction before she slipped away, heart pounding. Maybe meeting her was too much, hurt more than she thought it would. But she won’t show that. Not today. Not ever.
Natassia wondered if the girl notice the fact that her smile towards Cassiel lingered? Did she see beyond the tumble as a stunt to let Cassiel know she was there? Did she see Natassia glance over her shoulder and her husband do the same? If not, than she didn’t notice their eyes met, the nod given to her as though it was a promise to get away later. There is too much that poor Rosier didn’t see and yet Rosier was still on top. After all, Maxima was the one with her love, the one standing next to them as he orders their drinks. The one who can share more than just stolen glances. The one who has everything she wants. One day, she’ll step into her shoes. One day all of this will be hers. One day their love will prevail.
Extras: PINTEREST.
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ignqqopaesam-blog · 5 years ago
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vcsavgqaueoc-blog · 5 years ago
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0 notes