#IF THIS IS THE KIND OF STUFF THAT UPSETS YOU WHY WOULD I WNAT TO READ THE MANGA AT ALL

[elibean]

that was it????????? THAT was the cut that got the entire bsdogs fandom to boycott the anime?????????????

my god i will never understand manga fans

[lolita-lollipop]

REALLY REALLY SOFT YANDERE AIZAWA X READER

( mentions of anxiety, and paranoia)

This wasn’t requested. But I got super anxious and stressed today because I had a lot of stuff to do and not much Time to do it, so here’s just me projecting word vomit, thank you for reading .

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You’d spent the whole night contemplating life, Wondering what was going to happen in your future, he had faked about getting someone with an ienmortality to pass it to britt he of you, willingly or not. You just stared out your window the whole time, the familiar feeling of fear creeprd up on you, except this time, it was colder, it fully went through your body, giving you chills, and making you jsut wnat to ball up and cry.

From the moment you had woken up this morning, Aizawa could tell something was wrong, usually when you first wake up you get all cute and confused, Today you just kinda stared out at him, which was everything but normal, yet he continued on with the day, hoping that it was just a rough night for you, he’ll just put you down for a nap later.

But as the day progressed, he started to notice the worried glances towards the windows, the nails that you’d bitten down, the biting at your cheek, and the constant itching at your own neck. You avoided all tHe windows like the plague, as if something was wrong with them, like you were scared of them. It scared him, as he didn’t know why, and you were hurting yourself, which is a big no-no.

You hadn’t spoken to him, hadn’t tried to eat unless he forced the spoon into your mouth to hand feed you, just constantly on edge,It made the atmosphere tense. You’d been fiddling with the torn threads from aizawas t shirt, he had recently been having you wrar a lot more of his clothes, they smelled like him. The frayed edges just ankiyed you, so you pulled at them, in doing so, more would be forced to pop out, it’s like they were intentionally doing it to annoy you. You just kept tugging at it, making your fingers hurt, as the skin around the edges was peeling.

All day, the tingling feeling in the back of your mind jsut wouldn’t leave you, it was just the drowning feeling of anxiety, constantly feeling scared for no real apparent reason, feeling so stressed over little things, that your hands would shake while doing them. Eventually, you’d just gotten fed up with your own self, annoyed that the feeling wouldn’t just leave you, you held your head, feeling a headache coming on

“baby? Are you alright? You seem a little upset today, did I make you mad?” Aizawa questioned from his desk chair, peeking in Over at you in worry, you’d previously Been holding a crayon, coloring in a page of a coloring Book, one fo the adult ones, as he didn’t want to Upset you further by giving you a Disney princess one, you could have a break for the day.

“Uh huh- I’m just great daddy. Wonderful actually, this is just… fine” you managed to say, letting your hands run through your hair, catching on a few strands. You’d thought that you’d done a good job at covering up your evident uncomfortable-ness today, as he hadn’t approached duos about it yet, meaning he probably hadn’t seen it. But-oh-oh yes he did. He stood up, placing his laptop on the desk, walking over to you, and kneeling to your height. He pulled your hand into his own, clutching it gently.

“Oh honey- I’m just worried about you. I don’t want to force it, but can you please tell me what’s wrong? You look so sad, I just want to help.” He continued, this time, pulling your entire body close to his chest, you were significantly shorter than him, so it was quite easy to just hold you there. And hug you. His words were so soft, so loving, like he actually cared, it just shoved you over the edge of the cliff you were on, you’d been trying to cope the whole time today, ignoring him was just to help do that. It’s kind of like when you’ve just stopped sobbing, and then someone asks if you’re okay, and it jsut throws you right back into it.

“I- I don’t even- you jsut- why so I feel so- and I don’t wanna cry- daddy please help” you spluttered don’t, confused, it was all so overwhelining, like pain but not really pain, get it? You were no longer on the verge of crying, you were crying now, soft sobs left your lips as he picked you cram off the floor, grabbing a blanket on his way back to his officer chair. He hushed you comfortingly ont he way, placing you down in his lap and wrapping it around you.

You huffed, sobs racking your body, to quick for you to handle. Your breaths were short, countering the legs amount of energy being used to cry, making you feel lightheaded and woozy. Aizawa pulled you close, stroking at your hair, and looking at you in worry, he was expecting confusion, anger, maybe a few tears, not an outburst like this. He acted immediatelyz

“Can you give me some deep breaths sweet girl? I bet you’re stressed out aren’t you? I shouldn’t have ignored it, I’m sorry honey, daddy is realy sorry. “ he cooed, brushing th hair out of your face as you nuzzled your face into his chest, letting your tears soak his shirt, he didn’t care though, of course. You didn’t give a reply, insteAd nodding into him as he rubbed your back. The foreign feeling weighted over you like a rock, but with every pat or kiss form him, it became lighter and lighter. While your eyelid became heavier and heavier.

“Oh I know, you just let it all out to me all right? I’m sorry that you kept this in all day, just cry as mcuh as you want. That’s it”

———

“M’sorry for bothering you while you’re working, I should’ve just stayed quiet” you spoke, voice wavering slightly, you’d been sitting with him for over half an hour now, just a comforting silence between the two of you. And you realized how annoying you probably were, crying like a crybaby for no reason. He shit you a look, slowing his back patting for a moment.

“Don’t say that honey, if your evrnfelem upset you have to tell me right away alright? You are never a bother, I can’t have my little girl feeling sad can i? You bet I can’t” he replied with a stern undertone, answering his own wuestiome. You snuggled up under the blanjet, wrapping your arms around his waist and playing with the ends of his hair, he chuckled at how cute you looked, all of a sudden looking adorable sleepy. Probably now that he’s not so worried he can finally absorb the cuteness.

You wh in d at the sudden movement of him reaching over the desk to grab the stuffed teddy bear at the corner of the desk, bringing it over so you could hug it, usually he would lace you I bed by now, either his or yours, but tonight he wasn’t going to let you go, oh no, so you’re just gonna have to sleep in his lap until he finishes here. You don’t have any qualms right?

“We’re gonna have a really nice breakfast in the morning, you missed inch and dinner today, we gotta fill that tummy up. Goodnight baby”

“Goodnight… I-I love you”

“I love you too kitten, sweet dreams”

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How do we like? Was it too fluffy? Ion know.

*unedited, as it’s being written at like 1:54

Thank you for reading, have a wonderful day, and make sure or treat everyone with respect! Goodbye!

[idekwidcfo]

party time? a.k.a. “worse” version chapter 4

or maybe 3... I didn’t keep track very well... 

As I predicted, my dad was almost joyous at my request to go to a normal teenager parents-are-out-of-town party. He teased me, which I didn’t love, but he also gave me explicit permission to go and encouraged me to have fun. I hadn’t actually told him that my activities last night had been a date, but when he told me to bring a condom or dental dam or “whatever it is you people use” I felt it was better that he knew. 

“I’m actually going as a second date with this girl I like from school,” I told him, very pointedly not looking up from the homework I was pretending to do. 

I tried to stay focused on my math questions but as the seconds ticked past, his lack of a response became impossible to ignore. I found myself looking up from my homework despite the fact the only reason I had homework out was to give me an excuse not to look at him. He was just staring at me thoughtfully. The seconds continued to stretch out, long enough that I almost stopped feeling awkward. He finally nodded his head in obvious approval. “Good for you, kiddo. If you two are serious about things I’d like to meet her sometime.” 

I felt blood rush to my cheeks and wished that blushing wasn’t so obvious. “Oh, I don’t think that’s necessary, we just went out for the first time last night.” 

He got up and walked over to the fridge, grabbing a beer and cracking it. I tried to hold back my frown, but Christ, it was only about 10am. “You’re on two dates in two days? That sounds at least a little bit serious.” 

“Well, I’m not really even sure this counts as a date. We ran into a friend of hers at the show and he invited us. She said she’d go with or without me, but I figured you wouldn’t mind me getting out of the house.” 

He shrugged. “Well, if you take her on a third date I hope you’ll consider bringing her home. I’d give the two of you privacy if you wanted to hang out in your room and fool around.” 

I felt my face flush again. “Dad, that’s really not necessary.” 

“I know it’s not necessary but I also know teenagers are fucken horny and I’d rather have you foolin’ around downstairs where you’re safe and not gonna get a public indecency charge or banned from the local theater or whatever than have you goin’ out and doin’ it weird places and feelin’ like you can’t come talk to me if the condom breaks. Oh, I guess that wouldn’t be a problem for you, huh? Lucky kid-- no preggo scares for you! You’d still want to get tested for chlamydia and stuff, I suppose.” 

I wondered if my face would stay red permanently at this point. “Okay,” I conceded. “Thank you. I’ll talk to her about it and see if she is interested.” 

“That sounds good. Also, I know this is hypocritical coming from me, but make sure that after this party you’ve either got a place to crash or a ride home. I don’t need you taking after your old dad here and getting a DUI. Call me if nothin’ else, I’ll be good and drunk by then but better my experienced ass drives drunk than your inexperienced ass drives drunk and ends up wrapping you and this little lady around a tree and then you’re either dead or in the hospital with a bunch of medical bills and either way there goes my weekend.” 

I cracked a smile at his bad, dark joke, but I hated that he had just made such a good point such a stupid way. His grammar especially irked me. Sometimes it seemed like he was in a neverending competition with himself to see how long he could extend a run-on sentence. But he had a point that I hadn’t considered. I was not about to drive drunk. Ever. I hoped to die of old age having never driven drunk in my life. But I hadn’t thought about getting home. I had pretty much stopped planning at ‘go to party with Mar’. “Yeah, thanks,” I told him. “I’ll make sure we have that taken care of before we leave. In fact, I’m gonna go down to my room and message her about it now,” I said, excusing myself from the table. 

And I did just that. I logged onto AIM, hoping that Mar was online. To my relief, she was. 

Cows_IV: hey! Glad to catch you on. Got permission from my dad as expected but he brought up a good point of how do we get home? 

Mar didn’t respond for a bit, and I was worried that she was actually away from her keyboard despite her username showing up as “online now!” I opened MySpace and caught up on some of my other friends’ new photos and bulletins and whatnot, considering whether or not to also send her a text. Before I could make up my mind, however, I got a response on AIM. 

OHSHITITSMAR: hey! What do you mean? 

Cows_IV: I mean, like, I wanna drink and have a good time, but I don’t wnat to drink and drive. Do you know if we’ll be able to crash there? 

OHSHITITSMAR: oh! duh! You’ve never been to one of Derek’s parties! Yeah, he always has somewhere for people to crash. His dad has like a million couches for some reason. 

Cows_IV: oh cool! Perfect lol

Cows_IV: ummmmmmm 

Cows_IV: also my dad wants me to consider bringing you home so you can meet him. 

OHSHITITSMAR: ummmm ok. Why not lol 

Cows_IV: because he’s an alcoholic and will probably embarass me, but he did say we could have some privacy in my room. 

OHSHITITSMAR: well, privacy in your room sounds nice and I don’t mind alcoholics lol 

Cows_IV: cool lol so maybe like, next week you come over here after school? 

OHSHITITSMAR: well, I was kinda hoping you’d want to go to Electric Avenue again next Friday. They have a show nearly every week. 

Cows_IV: That works. We can come home and let my dad make us dinner, then go to the show afterwards. If that’s ok with you. 

OHSHITITSMAR: htat is okaby with me! 

Cows_IV: haha cool 

Cows_IV: I guess he sort of also brought up something else that I should figure out with you… 

Cows_IV: is this already our second date, or are we just two buds going to a party? 

OHSHITITSMAR: whatever you want. you need to be more assertive about what you want lol 

Oddly enough, or maybe not so oddly, that message stung. I knew that, of course I did, but it was hard. 

Luckily for me, it was easier to be brave from behind a keyboard. 

Cows_IV: noted. thanks. Constructive criticism. I can take it. 

Cows_IV: so on that note, if you’re counting tonight as a second date and we already have plans for a third date next Friday, I feel like one could argue that we are, in fact, date-ing, no? 

Cows_IV: so in conclusion, would you like to like oifficially like be my girlfriend or whatever? 

I typed the last sentence with my eyes closed and hit send before I could start to second-guess myself. I then immediately clicked back over to MySpace so that I would have something to do besides sitting there waiting for the “OHSHITITSMAR is typing…” notification to change to her response. Billie had posted a new photo of herself that was really flattering. I decided to write a detailed complimentary comment, mostly to take my mind off of waiting for Mar’s response. I was still working on it when my conversation with Mar started flashing, informing me that there was a new message. I took a deep breath and switched back to that window. 

OHSHITITSMAR: good for you! That’s what I call being assetive about what you want! I’d be down to officially be your girlfriend, athough i think i should let you know that part of me worries we’re jumping into things kinda fast? We just started actually talking like les than two weeks ago lol 

Cows_IV: I’m sorry but I have no idea what that means. So you will be my girlfriend but watch out we might be moving too fast? 

This time I just stayed in the window where our chat was and waited until “OHSHITITSMAR is typing…” turned into a message. 

OHSHITITSMAR: okay i see why that might not make a lot of sense. Sorry. So like, I like you, and I like haging out with you, but I feel like we’re still getting to know each other really. So like. If I don’t want to continue seeing you in a few weeks just cuz it like fizzles out and I realize I only like you as a friend I don’t really want it to be like a big serious thing. 

Well fuck that. I mean, I did kind of see where she was coming from, but fuck that. I wasn’t even sure what “that” I was addressing a “fuck” towards, but the short phrase summed up how I felt after reading her message. 

I couldn’t even begin to think of what I could or should say to that, so I decided to just wait for a bit. I finished up my comment on Billie’s new MySpace photo and posted it. I went upstairs to use the restroom and grab a pop. 

It didn’t help. What did someone say to that? It felt shitty. I guessed she was being like, careful or responsible or whatever, but it had hurt. 

The thing that hurt the most is that I knew I was absolutely crazy about her, and if she didn’t feel the same way, it was like… I didn’t know what it was like. I couldn’t think of a poignant enough simile or metaphor. The most accurate phrase to come to mind was simply, “incredibly disappointing”. I was also a bit angry. I had just asked her out! She had said yes! But instead of celebrating and congratulating myself, I was upset because she said she might not actually like me like that. 

I finally steeled myself for reading whether or not she had messaged me while I got myself a pop and emptied my bladder, and if so, what she had said. It turned out there were a few messages, and as I read them getting defensive clashed with feeling bad about having just left during a rather serious chat. 

OHSHITITSMAR: soooo you’re just not going to say anything to that? 

OHSHITITSMAR: look even if you just went to the bathrroom or something it’s kinda rude to just not say anything for five minutes after I said that. 

OHSHITITSMAR: are you gonna act mature and respond tyo me or are we just never gonna talk again now? 

OHSHITITSMAR: by the way in the fufute asking if someone wants to be your firlfriend “or whatever” isn’t a good move. the “or whatever” si so unnecessarily flippant. do you actually want me to be your fgirlfriend or is it just ‘whatever’?? 

I felt really shitty about myself. It won out over the defensiveness. She was right, I should have at least said, “okay”, or “give me time to think about how to respond”, or even “I’m gonna go to the bathroom and grab a pop brb.” I started typing something in another window, because I didn’t want her to see the “Cows_IV is typing…” message, but then she sent another message about me not saying anything. 

OHSHITITSMAR: you know it’s been ten minutes now since you’ve said anything? Can you please just respond to me? 

Cows_IV: sorry that was shitty of me, please hold for a better response. 

I continued to compose my better response in another window, even though it was obvious to Mar at this point that I had seen her messages. She didn’t say anything. I felt relieved that I was able to take my time on my response, but also disappointed that she didn’t have anything else to say. Finally, after editing it three or ten times, I was ready to send her the paragraph I had written. 

Cows_IV: It was immature of me to leave. I grabbed a pop and used the bathroom but I was also really disappointed and I didn’t know what to say, so I didn’t say anything. I totally admit that was shitty of me. I’m just kind of hurt, I guess. I really like you and it sounds like you’re saying you’re not actually sure if you like me. Also it was really dumb of me to say ‘or whatever’, I should have just been straightforward and asked if you’d like to be my girlfriend. I typed that and hit send as soon as possible so I couldn’t pussy out, but that’s not an excuse for me being so flippant while asking you to be my girlfriend. You were being honest with me, which I appreciate even if it hurt. I’d like to be your boyfriend and continue going on dates even if it does mean we break up in a month because you realize you don’t actually like me as more than a friend. I’m not going to lie and say that I won’t be hurt and upset if that happens, but I appreciate the headsup that it could. 

I copy and pasted the paragraph into our chat window and hit send. I felt a little better. Worrying over a response and landing on something that was both apologetic and understanding felt really mature. Feeling mature sure felt better than feeling defensive, upset, and angry. I zoned out for a bit, staring through the computer screen out into space, waiting for Mar to respond. I zoned back in when I distantly noticed there were more words for me to read. 

OHSHITITSMAR: ok, thanks for the apology. you drove me a little crazy just not saying anything for over ten minutes!! I do like you, I’m just worried I don’t really know you. How deep of a dive have we really gotten into with each other in only two weeks, you know? 

OHSHITITSMAR: And it goes both ways! 

OHSHITITSMAR: You might think you like me but you don’t really know me yet, and I’m like afriad that you won’tnlike me iuf you get to know me better so. 

OHSHITITSMAR: There’s tjat. 

OHSHITITSMAR: I guess I’m a little afraid. Of like. Getting close to someone. So. Thanks for being understanding and I am sorry if I did hurt your feelings. 

Cows_IV: glad we got through this pretty okay haha. Was it our first fight? Before we were even official? 

OHSHITITSMAR: no, it was our first fight after we became official, I said yes before we had that heavy convo lol. but people fight, I think it depends more on how they handle it than whterh or not they fight at all you know? And we did do good :) 

Cows_IV: yeah that’s a good point. So just to be clear, you are my girlfriend now? 

OHSHITITSMAR: yes, boyfriend, you and I are now a couple :) 

Cows_IV: wow! Lucky me :D 

OHSHITITSMAR: yes. But unlucky for you, I have to go grocery shopping since my mom’s too busy working one of her three jobs to do it. Whoo hoo being poor [eye rolling emoji]. I’ll see you here at 7 so you can take me to Derek’s party? 

Cows_IV: oh, that does suck. Are you walking there? I could come help you with my car. 

OHSHITITSMAR: hey now I don’t want to get sick of you. enjoy your Saturday afternoon and don’t worry about me or my grocery shopping. See you, what, at 6:52pm on the dot? 

Cows_IV: [laughing emoji] you’ve got me figured out. don’t hesitate to call me if you change your mind! I’m not doing anything but relaxing until I leave for your place at 6:39 on the dot :P 

OHSHITITSMAR: okay… I won’t but okay. See you at 6:52! 

OHSHITITSMAR is now offline.