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brokebonewritings · 2 years ago

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Bless Me, Father

Priest! Matt Murdock x afab! reader

Tags/Warnings: 18+, violence, smut, mention of religion, hurt/comfort

Summary: Seeking a priest for guidance. You just weren't expecting this priest to be an ex, and a vigilante.

Word Count: 4.2K

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A/N: This was written for a really dear friend of mine. I love them a lot, and I hope they love this story just as much! Pair this fic with A Question of Lust by Depeche Mode and Church by Chase Atlantic.

You walk into the church slowly as you think about what you would say. The cold bitter air pricks your nose, immediately warming as you step into the sanctuary. It’s been a long time since you have been here, though you feel comforted by the environment. Setting your bag and scarf on a pew, you walk towards the confessional booth and step inside quietly. You inhale and exhale before speaking to the priest on the other side.

“Bless me, father, for I have sinned.” You start. Hearing him shift in the booth next to you, you continue on. “It has been 3 months, and 15 days since my last confession.”

You continue to tell him about things you have done in the past few months. About things you feel are wrong, and how it makes you feel. How you felt shunned by your family for expressing your personal thoughts and interests. You begin to tear up as you finish speaking.

He sits for a moment before speaking. The air felt tight around you as you anticipated his voice.

“My child, there is no reason to weep.” His voice was soothing, much like a cup of hot chocolate. He continues. “What you are feeling about yourself is not wrong. You are on a journey of self discovery. Embrace it, and those who shun you will see the butterfly they mistook for a caterpillar. There is no penance for you today.”

You glance over at him, and catch a glimpse at the young priest. He looked stiff, as if he were a mannequin. You nod at his words and wipe the tears from your eyes. Stating the absolution, you thank him and step out of the booth.

Lingering for a moment, you took in sight of the beautiful cathedral. Nothing felt more peaceful than the quietness of the church. A few nuns were staggered in the pews or kneeling at the altar. The smell of sweet incense flowed through the air.

Turning to look over your shoulder, you see the priest step out of the booth and turn his head in your direction. He smiles and makes his way towards you to walk you out.

“I haven’t seen you here in a long time, y/n” He starts, you can tell he was shifting uncomfortably.

“Yeah, it has been a while huh?” You avert your gaze to the wood flooring. “Not since our breakup”

He winces at that comment. You didn’t have mal intent behind it. Just stating the fact. It had been a nasty one at that. He wanted to become a priest, and you wanted to have a family. Simple as that.

“Listen if you ever need to talk…” He sighs. “You know where you can find me.”

“Sure, sure. For godly insight I suppose?” You mutter. “Since when did Father Lantom step down?”

“About a month ago. I was appointed here personally.” Seeing the grip he held on his cane, you decided to take your leave. Not wanting to further the conversation before it got too awkward.

“I, uhm, have to head to work. Those court documents are not gonna write themselves, I guess.”

“Right. Well. Hopefully I will see you back again soon..” He said, giving a curt nod before you turn to leave. “And, God be with you, y/n”

“God be with you too, Father Murdock.”

“He WHAT?!” Karen whispered in your shared office. She really was your closest friend so obviously you had to tell her.

“Right! So he was my ex from college which was so long ago, but god we were so in love.” You crossed your arms in defeat. “How could he look even better now?!”

“Oh no! You cannot go running back to that ‘used to be good’ feeling.” She stood and crossed to you. “Did you forget that, HE’S A FUCKING PRIEST.”

“I KNOW!” You huff. You were perfectly content without the knowledge of Matt actually achieving his dream. Sure it was extremely selfish of you to think, but he did break your heart. No wonder you hadn’t heard anyone talk about him, he basically fell off the face of the earth. Lost in thought, you hardly noticed when your boss approached your office.

“What’s up guys? What’s the hot gossip?”

You look up to see your boss, Foggy, leaning against the doorframe. Hardly a boss though, he liked to consider himself a friend to everyone in the office.

“y/n wants to fuck a priest!” Karen casually said. You gasped loudly at her sudden statement, and stood up from your chair.

“I never said that!”

“Woah, didn’t see that one coming.” Foggy chuckled at the response. “Why a priest though?”

You roll your eyes as you lean against your desk. “It was a really long time ago okay? And he definitely wasn’t a priest then.”

Foggy cocks an eyebrow and looks at Karen. Who in return gives him a look.

“So what was he then?” Karen asks, looking back at you. You considered the question for a moment before sitting back down.

“Just a good catholic boy, I guess.”

“You guess?” Foggy says suddenly.

“I mean, sure we had some fun.” You start quietly. “But we always found our way back to church on Sundays…”

“I thought you weren’t religious?” Karen asked curiously. You considered the question before answering.

“I’m not anymore. Not after how everyone made me feel after our breakup.” You turn back towards your desk to end the conversation. Foggy and Karen both shrugged at each other before going back to their own tasks.

Letting the tears fall silently from your eyes, you didn’t like when people watched you cry. Not that you liked to be emotional, but you didn’t want anyone to see you as weak.

The work day was long and strenuous. You worked quietly at your desk, only looking up to answer questions or find more paperwork.

Clients called and you helped to the best of your ability to answer questions, sending them to Foggy if you couldn’t. Until it was way past your time to head. You hadn’t realized it was dark outside. Turning around, you noticed Karen was also still working.

You gather your belongings and stand to leave. Giving Karen a quick hug, before heading out.

You walked quickly down the street after getting off the bus. Not that you were trying to act in fear, but you definitely knew that someone was following you down the street.

Hell's Kitchen was never the safest at night anyways. Working late was the worst, especially in cases that involved some sort of underground organization.

Turning down another block, you turn your head to see if the man is still following you. Of course he fucking was. What is the deal with men these days? Maybe you were overthinking it, and he just lived on the same street as you. Clearly you were too lost in your anxiety to not notice the second man coming from in front of you.

“Hey, pretty thing. Where are you rushing off too?” He says before grabbing your wrist. You gasp suddenly, trying to rip your hand from his grip.

“Please let go, I’m just trying to go home!”

“Oh honey… Our boss would like to have a word with you.”

Without missing a beat, the man wraps his arm around your waist, and begins to pick you up. The kicking and punches you were throwing didn’t seem to phase him. His other hand covered your mouth to muffle your screams.

That’s when you noticed a dark figure standing on top of the building nearest you. You prayed that it would help you.

And just like that, your prayer was answered. Maybe. You watched as the figure jumped down into the alley way. Forgetting that for a moment, you continue to kick and flail your arms to deter the man.

Of course there was a parking structure for these guys' convenience. You never understood how no one caught on to these things. While putting you into the car, you feel his body slamming against the door with force. Laying on the floor you scream as you see a man clad in a full white suit tower above you.

“Wait! Wait!” He puts his hands up in surrender “I’m a good guy I promise!”

Finally getting a full look at him, you realized you had never seen this hero before. Sure you’ve run into Spiderman multiple times, and even that Dr. Strange guy.

He stretches out his hand to help you up and you hesitantly take it. You narrow your eyes at him once you’re out of the car. The accent was not from around here. British. It was definitely British. “So who are you supposed to be?” You ask.

“Oh erm. Just call me Mr. Knight.” He starts and then continues with a bow. “It’s a little late to be walking around here, innit?”

You shrug and stand there awkwardly. Reaching for your satchel you finally realize it was missing. Turning back to the car you bend and reach around for it. Once you find it, you climb back out and turn to see that this “Mr. Knight” guy was gone and replaced with a scarier version of a mummy.

He sees the surprise on your face and the fear flash in your eyes. “Same guy. Don’t call me Mr. Knight though.”

The once crisp white suit had turned into a wrapped garment with a large crescent moon in the middle of his chest. It really did look like a superhero outfit.

“Stay right here. I need to get rid of these guys.”

You nodded and watched as both goons got back to their feet in a battle stance. The man in white pulled two crescent shaped blades from his chest, and waited for one of them to throw a punch. As they began their battle, you ran further back to avoid any debris flying around.

Turning your back against the violence, you didn’t want to see what was going to happen. Your eyes shut tight as you hear the gargled screams of your kidnappers. Once you determined it was all over you glance back up and see another figure standing in the dark parking structure.

Gasping loudly you trip over your own feet before falling backwards. You scramble back up and run over to the man who just saved you. He looked confused as to what you were frightened about. That was until he saw the figure.

“If you know what’s good for you then you need to leave.” He said.

The figure in front of him growled. “I’m only here for her.”

Wait. You had seen this silhouette before. Sometimes as you walk down the street you would catch a glimpse of him. ‘The Devil of Hell's Kitchen’ they called him.

“It’s him.” You let out slowly. The man in white looked towards you, before you noticed the grip on his crescent weapons.

“Listen, guy, the lady is not interested in getting kidnapped tonight.” He said harshly. “You look like you don’t wanna die tonight either.”

“What makes you so sure you’re gonna kill me?” The figure taunted before taking a step forward. You look at this stranger with begging eyes. Hoping that you wouldn’t have to be in the middle of a hero battle. He sighed as he looked at you and then back at the devil.

“You asked for it pal.” He muttered before running towards the dark figure. Each fluid motion of his fists were dodged by the other man. You could tell that he was growing tired of the devil missing his punches.

He snarled loudly before yelling, “I’m tapping out!”

Suddenly the wraps disappeared and the white suit returned. The crescent shaped knives were replaced with a long bow staff. Breaking it in half, he readied himself for the devil’s next attack.

He was quickly met with a kick to his face and the sharp inhale really proved how hard the kick was. The next rounded kick was stopped by the chain attached to Mr. Knight’s staff. The devil flipped back as he untangled the chain from his ankle.

It was like lightning the way that Mr. Knight moved. He threw his hook up towards a pipe and went into a sprint. Swinging himself around so that he could end up on the other side of the other man. Failing as the devil grabbed hold of his forearm and slammed him on the ground.

The sound alone made your ears ring. You stayed behind the car door watching them fight. It was the only battle you have seen up close, and boy did it not fail to both excite you and make you feel fear.

Continuing with his motion, the devil begins to punch the hero into the cement. Over and over. Until finally there was a sudden stop of movement.

Mr. Knight held the devil’s fist, straining to keep it from making contact with his face once again. You noticed that the man in red looked up suddenly at you. His intense gaze made shivers go down your spine.

“Oi, wait a minute I know you!” Mr. Knight said suddenly. “Daredevil! It’s Us!”

‘Daredevil’ snapped his head back down to look at Mr. Knight and pulled his fist away.

“Steven?” His rough voice sent more shivers down your spine. The tone sounded vaguely familiar, like you had heard it somewhere before.

“Yeah mate!”

The man in red stood up fully and held his hand out to help Steven up. You don’t understand fully how he didn’t recognize him, if you saw a suit that crisp you would have remembered immediately.

You stand surprised as the suit morphed back to the wrapped garment. It changed right in front of you, just like magic.

“Where’s your partner, Spector.” Daredevil asked. “You never go anywhere without them.”

He winced after the question. Something personal you supposed. “It’s the reason why I’m in America.” He leaves it at that.

Both men turn to look at you. You cower a bit not really knowing what they are about to do. The devil takes a step towards you, and you promptly take a step back. He holds up both his hands.

“I’m not here to hurt you.” He states. “I thought you were in danger.”

You narrow your eyes at him. “Yeah well, Sailor Moon beat you to it.”

“Hey!” The other hero said with offense in his voice.

You both turn to look at him. He hesitates a moment, most likely not going to say another word. How could you be meeting two heroes in one night? Well, not heroes, more like vigilantes it seemed like.

Clearing your throat, you looked around at the scene and wondered which lucky person would find that in the morning.

“This has been real fun, but I’d really like to go home and sleep.” You finally say. Daredevil and Mr. Knight both nod towards you as you start walking away.

“Let me walk you home.” A gruff voice says, turning to see Daredevil take a step towards you. It wasn’t a question, it was clearly a statement. “To make sure you get home safe.”

You shrug and walk towards the entrance of the parking structure. A voice calls from behind you both that makes you stop dead in your tracks.

“Hey Murdock, if you see my partner, give me a call…” Moonknight said with a hint of sadness in voice. You glance up at the vigilante beside you. Murdock. Matthew Murdock. The only Murdock you knew.

He reaches a hand up to touch your shoulder. Not believing what you had just heard, you flinch away. “Matt?” You managed to choke out.

“I’m sorry.” He says gently. “Let’s just get you home.”

“No.” Tears pricking your eyes. “You need to tell me what’s going on.”

“Fine.” He says before starting to walk again. You follow close behind him. Street after street you managed to keep up with him. Seeing the church come into view you realize that he was taking you to his own sanctuary.

Matt opens the side gate to the cemetery and steps aside so you could enter first. You step inside and head to the bench you both sat at when you were younger. He lingers a bit by the gate before entering and following you deep into the graveyard.

Once you both are inside, and he makes sure the coast is clear, he takes off his mask. Setting it down next to you, you stare at it. You cannot actually believe that you were saved by Daredevil. Well sort of.

And to make it all worse, Daredevil was your ex. Your knight in shining armor was someone who completely broke your heart. How poetic. You look up at him as he paces.

“You do realize how sacrilegious this is, right?” Your comment definitely breaks the ice. The smile that tugs on the corner of his mouth is only slightly comforting.

“This started way before the priest thing.” He stops pacing and sits next to you. “While we were together actually.”

“You’re joking.” Your mouth gapes open. He stays silent. “Oh god. You’re serious.”

He grabs the mask before speaking up. “ It’s partially the reason why we broke up.”

“What?” You his through your teeth. Was this guy serious right now? “What do you mean it's partially the reason why we broke up? You said you wanted to pursue a life of Christ, Matt.”

“I did! Didn’t I?!” He raised his voice. “I did what had to be done to protect you, y/n!”

You stood from the bench and put your hands over your ears. Not wanting to hear another word from his mouth.

“Okay what are you doing?” He asked.

“I don’t want to listen to you anymore!” You shout. “I mean do you even know how ridiculous that sounds!”

“I did it for you, y/n! I did all of this for you!”

Then there was silence. Not even the wind howled through the trees in that moment. Letting everything sink in, you felt your heart pounding against your chest. You bring your arms down in a folded position and stare at the man in front of you.

“I really was in love with you, Matt.”

“I’m still in love with you.” He stood as he confessed. “I think about you. Morning, Noon and Night.”

Air that was trapped in your lungs was released all at once. Like you have not been breathing for a whole year. You felt insane to think that this wasn’t some convoluted nightmare.

He took a step towards you, and you let him. Feeling like this had all happened for some divine reason, you let him take your hand. His glove was rough against your skin. You never broke your eye contact off of his face. Studying how his jaw tensed and untensed, or how his eyes always followed the sound of your voice.

“Please Matty.” You sniffle. “You broke my heart once. I can’t take it a second time.”

“I promise you, there won’t be a second time.” He says before leaning down and kissing you gently. It takes a moment for your brain to process what was happening. Once you realize it was in fact a real kiss, you kiss him back. Arms snaking their way around his neck and his around your waist.

The kiss becomes more hunger filled. You can tell you both were touch starved by the way your hands began to roam. His body was pressed into yours, and you could feel yourself getting more turned on every second.

“Sweetheart.” He says. “You smell so fucking good.”

You moan lightly against his lips. Taking his bottom lip between your teeth, you tug on it lightly earning yourself a low groan. The way it vibrated between both your chests went straight to your core.

“Matty. I need you.” You pant as you pull from him slightly. He cups your face with his hand and nods.

“I need you too, sweetheart.”

Rushing through the front door of the church, you kiss the man in front of you with an intense passion. You can’t remember the last time you were touched by a man. Let alone kissed by one.

The way he grabs your waist with his gloved hands was addicting. You feel every desire and you’re sure that he could smell your arousal. You begin pushing him towards a pew before he turns you around and stops the motion altogether.

“Wait.” Hearing his voice startled you. “We should move to somewhere more private.”

“Where? The only other place is your office, and I’m not about to be bent over a desk, Matt.”

He raises an eyebrow and looks in thought. Whatever was going through his head made your heart start to race. Taking your arm, he leads you towards the confessional booth pulling off his suit, and your own clothes in the process.

Once he is satisfied with how naked the both of you are, he climbs inside. You follow behind him and once he makes himself comfortable in the seat, you straddle his lap.

Leaving a trail of marks down his neck, you feel the heat of his hard cock against your stomach. Moaning from the sensation you readjust yourself and begin to slide him into you. You hear the way his breath catches as your tight cunt passes over his cock.

It’s silent in the church, the only sounds being made were the moans coming from you and the priest you had underneath you. You can’t help but wonder if this was the wrong thing to be doing. Despite those thoughts, you continue to lewdly whimper and sink yourself onto him.

“Oh Father Murdock, how fucking holy art thou” You smirk as you hungrily kiss him.

This makes him groan against you as he thrusts himself deeper inside you. Gasping loudly, you feel his cock in the pit of your stomach. How he managed to thrust that far into you was an act of God. You look down to watch his hips thrust up into you, and you push down onto his cock. It was absolutely breathtaking knowing that he was doing this to you.

“Y/N, you are going to be the absolute death of me.” He gapes, “You feel like absolute heaven.”

“I’m not going to last much longer, Matty” You clench around his length as you begin to bounce more sloppily.

You hear a slight growl creep up from the back of his throat before he grabs your thighs and flips you both over. This new angle had you at a curve, which made each thrust more earth shattering.

“You don’t get to come until I allow it.” His voice echoed through the small booth. Chills were sent up your spine. Looking up at this holy man through your lust filled eyes, you try to focus on every feature of his face. The way his jaw was tensed, and how his eyebrows furrowed.

The intensity of each thrust sent you into an overstimulated galaxy. Seeing stars was typically not what you experience in times like these. Then again, you both had not had sex in a long while.

His panting mixed together with the groans falling from his lips was drawing you to your edge. The little voice in your head kept repeating itself. ‘You don’t get to come until I allow it.’. Fuck did that have an affect on you.

Your moans began to sound more high pitched as the overstimulation hit you. He lowers his head to your chest, taking a nipple into his mouth and sucking on it harshly. The gasp you let out pleased him even more.

He continued to suck before moving his mouth to your neck, leaving small bruises here and there. You could feel his thrusts start to slow down as if he were getting tired.

“Pl- please, I'm begging you.” You whimper pathetically.

He smirks before whispering in your ear. “On the count of three. Okay, sweetheart?”

You nod as you groan loudly.

“One.”

His thrusts begin to pick up, as he fucks you harder than before.

“Two.”

Your cunt starts to clench around his cock as you try to hold on for that third number.

“Three.”

You both moan and pant as you come together. The pulse of his cock as it releases his hot seed into you feels good against your quivering pussy. Never before have you experienced an orgasm this good.

Breathing finally steadying out, you stare up at him. The sweat running down his forehead was very prominent. You noticed a smile beginning to make his way onto his face. You smile as well.

“What?” You ask quietly.

“I think this is the most sacrilegious thing I have ever done.” He says back in a whisper.

“Oh and not the vigilante thing?”

He shakes his head before pressing his forehead to yours. “How bout you tell me about what has your heart racing at the moment?” He says instead.

“I just didn’t think I would ever be doing this.”

“How about you share your confession then?” He says while giving you another small thrust making you moan.

“Oh…” You ponder. “Then, bless me, Father, for I have sinned.”

#daredevil #matt murdock #marvel #fanfiction #daredevil fanfiction #daredevil fandom #daredevil fic #charlie cox #imagine writer #fanfic writing #imagine #brief moonknight #moon knight #steven grant #marvel fanfiction #matt murdock x reader #matt murdock x you #matt murdock fic #matt murdock smut

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m1ckeyb3rry · 9 months ago

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Hiii Mickey! B4 I request smt I just wanna congratulate you on 500 (u deserve sm more) your writing is literally heaven. Shakespeare who? 🤔 Anyway, b4 I completely forget what I came to request and start yapping on about how ur a literature god, may I pls req jealously hc on SitH characters?

Sincerely,

friedrichswifegirlfriendfiancesidechick

── SOMEBODY'S JEALOUS!

Synopsis: Headcanons about how some of the SitH boys act when they are jealous.

Event Masterlist

Pairing: Colt x Reader, Friedrich x Reader, Hadrian x Reader, Marek x Reader

Word Count: 0.9k

Content Warnings: 3/4 of these characters are ocs from a specific fic i wrote so that ig?? also friedrich is a menace but what's new

A/N: you're too sweet anon AHAH thank you so much!! i can't believe you like sith sm that you want to request for it...that's actually so crazy to me but means sm thank you again!! i wasn't sure which characters you wanted so i just did my favs hehe

Additional: part of my 500 follower event! see the event description and rules to make a request of your own.

Colt Grice

i think he would be the pouty type of jealous if that makes sense

like he's not going to say anything outright but he lowkey acts like a child

becomes super clingy in the moment

afterwards is all like "why don't you love me anymore 🙁"

"what does he have that i don't 🙁🙁🙁”

he's cute about it though like you can't even be mad at him because he's genuinely so worried that you like this other person more

definitely would try not to make it your problem though like he recognizes that it's his own issue to deal with so he's not going to get upset with you just for talking to someone

will probably refer to himself as your boyfriend in front of whoever he's jealous of just so that they know their place and he WILL be petty about it

he's a pretty chill guy overall so i don't think he would be too horrible but he definitely has his moments of insecurity and doubt

would not hesitate to fight a man if you expressed that you were majorly uncomfortable though. he literally goes to the gym JUST to be able to beat a man up if necessary

otherwise though he trusts you to handle it

just be prepared for him to be extra affectionate afterwards

Friedrich Visser

unlike his best friend he turns into a supervillain if he's jealous

like friedrich 99% of the time is this sweet, adoring boyfriend (setting aside how sassy he is and how much he definitely teases you)

he jokes around a lot and is relatively unserious most of the time so you literally get whiplash when a guy starts flirting with you and all of a sudden your goofy bf is replaced with his evil twin

he's very tall and he will use that to full effect

modern au friedrich is a boxer so he gets bonus intimidation points for that and canon friedrich is a warrior candidate so at that point any guy might as well give up LMAOAO

he's also creepy looking (STILL HANDSOME GUYS I PROMISE HE'S HANDSOME HE JUST HAS A CREEPY VIBE TO HIM THAT FREAKS PEOPLE OUT) and normally he wishes he was more approachable but now?? it's exactly what he needs

he'll start whispering quietly in a foreign language and the person thinks he's cursing their bloodline (he's literally just reciting the irregular verbs in the preterite tense in spanish)

a glarer. he has a crazy death stare and he will take advantage of it

creates such an inhospitable atmosphere that the person literally just runs away out of fear

then he's back to his regular self and asks if you want a sweet treat or something

he's paying ofc because he's the best boyfriend in the world and you could never dream of wanting someone else. right??? 🤨🤨🤨

Hadrian Amata

to be honest i cannot see him being jealous or at least acting like he is

he is far and away the most emotionally mature person on this list (and probably in the entire sith-verse tbh)

like if someone is hitting on you he'll literally agree with them and tell them he thinks you’re pretty too

he might hold your hand or hug you or something in front of them just so that they leave you alone, but that's about the extent of it i think

he’s not a pushover though. if someone isn't taking a hint he will tell them to leave and then escort you away himself because he doesn't want you to have to deal with that kind of bs

he was raised with a sister so he knows better than to be possessive or controlling

he wouldn't want someone treating xanthe like that so he's not about to treat you like that yk??

major green flag but that was to be expected from him

Marek Birdwhistle

this depends on what universe we're looking at

if it's a modern au where he doesn't get scarred or pre-athyae then he's funny and lighthearted about it

he is canonically the best looking character in the story (besides y/n) pre-athyae incident so if we're talking about a world where he doesn't get tortured and whatnot then honestly just the sight of him near you will be enough for people to back off

like no wayyy are they flirting with you when MAREK BIRDWHISTLE is right there

honestly you might be the one who gets jealous i bet he gets mad bitches 😭

but he pretty much ignores all of them...he only really has eyes for you so although he's friendly to anyone he'll (very politely) reject anyone who makes serious moves

if someone does have the guts to approach you he'll lowkey judge them

he's going to be subtle about it but he won't hesitate to point out their flaws and ruin their self-confidence

now if this is in canon, especially post-athyae...i don't think he gets jealous necessarily because he literally just hates himself so much that it would only make sense if you want someone else

i’m not going to describe his injuries in this because they're pretty horrific and you’ve all read the chapter but yeah. he genuinely does not believe that you love him when he looks like that

he went from constantly being praised for being handsome to people being horrified by half of his face (which is generally kept bandaged but still) so it is a HUGE change for him

he would require reassurance that you are with him for more than just his appearance and that you don't find him hideous at all

omg pls be nice to him fr he deserves better i think the only characters who can claim to be treated as poorly by the narrative as him are the haas twins 😔

#colt grice #friedrich visser #hadrian amata #marek birdwhistle #ship in the harbor #reader insert #headcanon #m1ckeyb3rry milestone #m1ckeyb3rry writes

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fakeshibe · 1 year ago

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the internet is so overtly hostile to kids and young people. commercialisation and profit margins killed off the places younger kids were safe and welcome to be in, creeps and those seeking to goad people towards extremism took over those spaces designated for teens.

There is no safe place. Every time i see a 14 year old on twitter, I see them being told to get off the platform. It’s not safe, it’s not for you. And that’s entirely correct, twitter is not a safe place for a 14 year old, but where is? Tumblr? not really. Club penguin? it’s dead. Community forums? not really a thing anymore. Discord? not without that teen being very aware of their safety and how to look after themselves, at which point they may as well have stuck to twitter.

Like it or not, it’s the job of every single one of us to make a space that is safe for teens. Doesn’t mean you have to be kid friendly, just means you need to take reasonable precautions that your not-kid-friendly content stays in your space, that they can’t accidentally come across it. Content warnings, censoring/spoilering posts, possibly avoiding the main tags for a thing if that topic is child friendly and your art is not. stuff like that. Like if young people are likely to search for stuff like lego, maybe don’t put your nsfw bionicle ship art into the general lego tag, stuff like that.

It’s your job to keep an eye out for your fellow humans. If you see a young person they you know displaying signs that they’re possibly being harassed/groomed/generally made uncomfortable/not doing well, make sure they have a safe person to speak to. You don’t have to be that safe person, you just need to make sure there’s someone who can listen to them.

If you see a kid doing something they really shouldn’t be, it’s on you to explain why they shouldn’t be doing that. Don’t berate them, don’t attack them for it. Explain, help them to understand why that’s concerning to you. We all know internet safety classes in schools are pretty rubbish, usually super outdated. I did a child safety course like two years ago that still included tips on building a safe myspace page. School isn’t going to teach kids about the immediate issues on todays internet, it’s on the community around them to guide them and look out for them.

Also playground humour is fine, just be aware when you’re joining in to not take it too far or make it weird. And bear in mind that even just by virtue of being a couple of years older than whatever young person you’re talking to, there’s a power imbalance in that conversation. Don’t encourage playground humour to the point of making it an entirely inappropriate topic. Your the one guiding this conversation, steer it in the right direction.

And if you see someone being weird towards any minor, wether you know them or not, call that shit out. Let it be known that someone is keeping an eye out, let that kid know that they’re welcome and they’re looked out for. Let that creep know that people see them, and people are very, very aware of what they’re doing. Make them feel unwelcome, run them out of your spaces, spread awareness of risky people. Keep your spaces safe.

This is all especially as important as IRL spaces become more hostile to potentially vulnerable young people. Queer teens especially are going to be looking for community and safety online more and more frequently. Make sure that the places they find will be a respite from the real world, not just a different set of threats to navigate.

Make sure young people feel safe on the internet, and make sure that those looking to take advantage of their presence, don’t.

Why am i writing all this? I’ve seen too many posts about people’s experiences as a young person online, and i talked to my brother the other day about him and his friend’s experiences and it’s terrifying that there’s really nowhere for young people to go. Also i’ve realised that i’m not doing enough to be part of the solution. so this is part of that, im gonna be far, far more aware of the issue and doing more to try and help.

#internet safety #This post brought to you by seeing several communities on twitter oust dodgy people the last few days #no beef with bionicle fans btw i just couldn’t think of another example

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idkbroimjusthere · 9 months ago

Text

The Path I Chose | part two

Summary: I'm a freelance CIA agent. That's not really a thing but that's what I call it. I'm working for a woman named Kate laswell on some off the books investigating. We've been searching for Information on a child trafficking ring that has connections to ultra nationalist groups through europe. I don't get to know the details, but I know enough to do my job. I know what I'm doing is dangerous, but I'm staying away from the worst of it, Right?

Content Warning: This is going to be pretty dark cannon typical violence and all that, some implied SA, and forced proximity I guess? so no minors and read at your own risk. Also there will probably be sex cause I'm a perv

Somebody is talking, an urgent tone present. It's not a voice I recognize and I can't quite make out what they are saying. Another voice joins in, someone closer to me, I think I've heard that one. I try to focus on what I can hear in a half asleep state but it's difficult. Exhaustion scatters my thoughts as voices fade

I startle awake, eyes opening, as pain sears through my arm. We're in a car or van or something. I'm sitting on ghosts' lap with his arm holding me still as the other man who saved me pours something over the nasty gash in my thigh. It burns worse than it did when I got it.

I scream in my head but it comes out weak, like a muffled sob.

"Shhh, it's alright" the man called ghost says, "it's ok love, you're ok" he repeats, moving his hand up and down on my back.

The sleeve of my shirt is ripped open with careful hands. A particularly deep cut on my bicep that's pain had become unnoticeable, once again sears as whatever it is that they're cleaning it with is poured down my arm. I cry out and jerk away.

"Be fucking careful soap" the man holding me barks. A mumbled "sorry" is all he gets in response as the conversation happening around us continues. He turns his attention back to me and again repeats that everything is ok. I feel weak from the pain, and consciousness slips away.

I wake up again to the sound of running water and a whispered "I'm sorry love, we have to get you clean or you could get an infection, you're ok, I'm sorry." My eyelids flutter open and closed, and I try to move my legs. Water sloshes over my belly and I realize I'm in a bathtub, being washed. Fear and adrenaline shoot through me.

"No, what's going on" I strain my voice, trying to get the words out but they are quiet and mumbled still. "It's ok, you're safe, it's alright." I try to lift my arm but a big hand pulls a half wet towel back over me. I hadn't realized that I was covered and I feel some relief knowing that he isn't looking at me completely naked, even though he's probably to one who undressed me. Ghost, I believe. Weird name but whatever.

"Almost done, can you hear me?"

I nod yes and that's all I can think to do. I'm scared but I think I'm ok. It's hard to tell, but I think this man really is just trying to help me. His words soothe me as the water runs over my wounded arm, the towel being carefully lifted to expose it.

"Watch it Lt. If you keep talking all sweet to 'er like that I'll start to think you've gone soft"

My eyes shoot to the man over ghosts' shoulder. I hadn't even noticed that he was here. I'm glad to see him averting his eyes, looking at the ceiling. What did they call him? Something strange, I can't remember. My face flushes red and I look at ghost. His face is covered in a black balaclava with a skull painted on it but I can see his eyes. They are lined with black paint, but the light color of his eyelashes contrasts it. He has brown eyes. That's all I can think right now, too overwhelmed by what's happening. I've never been bathed by another person, let alone two strange men, but I'm oddly calm for being in such an uncomfortable situation.

The bathtub sits in the corner of a small bedroom. The room looks old, but clean, a small lamp on the nightstand illuminates it with a soft orange glow. The ceiling and walls are wood, and I figure we're in a cabin. The water is warm and there is electricity so it can't be too off-grid but it's northern Europe, possibly Russia so I really only have a vague estimate of where we are in the world. I could have been asleep for hours on the way here and I didn't look outside at all so we could be anywhere. I don't think I would have woken up if we got on a fucking plane.

"What's your name?" Ghost asks as he runs his fingers through my damp hair, trying to be gentle as he combs out the knots.

"I need water." I state

"I'll get you water, what's your name?" he doesn't move, eyes fixed on mine. I look away.

"Jane"

"Good. Johnny, get Jane some water." Johnny picks up a bottle from the nightstand and hands it ghost, who unscrews it and brings it to my mouth. I drink for a while and when I'm satisfied I move my head back. He puts the bottle down and grabs a fresh towel and some folded clothes sitting on a stool by the tub.

"We'll get you dressed now and you can sleep"

"No, wait, who are you? Where are we?"

"It's alright, we work with your boss, Kate laswell. We came to get you, and some information, we work with her often."

"Can I talk to her, please?"

"No" he says "not right now, we have a debrief with her in a half hour but you don't have the clearance to be there. We will talk about what comes next after you rest."

I think about how I got into this situation to begin with. The conversations I had with Kate that led me to getting interrogated by terrorists. It all seems so far away, like that was years ago. I'd assume the drugs they were giving me haven't worn off by how hard it still is to focus on remembering things and the timeline of how I got here.

"O-ok" I try to be strong but I really wish I could talk to someone I know. Someone who could get me on a plane back home. I'm done. Ghost carefully removes the wet towel and covers me with the dry one. A few tears fall down my face, despite my best efforts.

"Arms up" ghost says, wrapping the towel around my chest. He grabs a T-shirt and helps me lift my arms, sliding it over my head. "Stand up, I've got you." His voice is soft. Softer than anything I've heard in a while. It feels natural, the way he slides his arm behind my knees and scoops me up out of the tub, easily. You'd think his stature would make me nervous, but right now, when he's being as gentle as he can, slowly helping me into a pair of sweatpants while I lean over his shoulder to keep upright, I feel sort of safe. And very tired, I've been so full of adrenaline and fear for so long that my body can no longer keep up.

I'm carried to the bed and set down on wonderfully soft pillows that I sink into without hesitation. I'm covered in a thick cotton quilt, soft with age and smelling like fresh linen and a hint of smoke. I sigh deeply and my eyelids droop.

"We'll just be in the other room, get some sleep"

"Ok" I say, sounding a bit less sad this time.

#simon ghost riley #ghost x female reader #soap mctavish #simon ghost riley x reader #ghost x reader #cod #call of duty #captain john price

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im-autistic-and-i-must-ramble · 2 months ago

Text

Masking; and the deconstruction thereof

I made a choice this summer to stop masking.

I was wrapped in such a strange balance of logic gates constructed to survive a world that seemed to hate me in specific. So much of myself was only internal. People had to wait months or even years to know things about me.

I had a revelation. I started masking because it hurt to much to watch the people who love you look you in the eyes while excitement pours out of you, joy and animation you rarely have the luxury to experience, and then they utter a noncommittal noise and turn away without comment. It hurt so much to be utterly disregarded. Yeah, My parents weren't abusive, but they either willingly ignored, infantilized, and undermined me. Or the interpretation I'm going with; they were human beings and parenting is fucking hard. But functionally I started to go inside as a child because I had no one to keep me on the outside, what was the point of the real world. No one there liked me, or was nice to me, or wanted to talk to me. Adults straight up despised me. Adults like smart kids in very small doses and only if they're smart in an approved manner. If you were an angry autistic kid with communication problems who just wanted legitimate questions answered, people fucking HATED you.

I think I made them uncomfortable to be honest. I know that I questioned literally everything and when it didn't make sense or was logically unsound I made sure people knew it. And when a literal child is questioning your worldview and you don't have an answer I suppose it can be rather embarrassing.

I say all this because the reason I started intentionally unmasking is I felt myself going inside again. The world around me becoming so distant that I am barely awake and I spend every waking moment in my own imagination. I haven't been like this since I was about 13 and I do not want to regress.

I am a creature of fractures. Part of me would love nothing more then a full scale retreat into the only place where I have felt happy and safe, the recesses of my own mind. But Part of me remembers that the few moments of contentment in my adult life have all been at the hands of the people I love.

The Larp social seated with all those people who I love and who love me. And I made that myself. No one there to ease the socialization. I had to have courage.

Addam bought me those tickets to feed the hippos. We giggled like school kids as we tossed whole heads of lettuce into those monstrous jaws.

Joe, who I held in my heart like a brother. The only person I had ever practiced with and will ever practice with most likely.

But now everyone at larp hates each other. Now Addam lives in Mexico.

Now Joe wont talk to me. I don't know why.

Now Kris is dead. The one member of my family who always treated me like an equal. Like my mind and my experience was worth a damn. When I got my autism diagnosis, when I got my OCD diagnosis. We talked about what it was like, how neither one of us realized it was the same thing. Because OCD looks like cleaning and neither one of us was a clean freak. I wasn't alone. It ran in the family. SOMEONE FINALLY GOT IT. And hes fucking dead.

Maybe thats why it hurts so much more now when the one person in the world I have left in any meaningful way, just disregards me. That old feeling of being nothing, being less then nothing, being a pest, a bother, just obliterates anything else in here. It is a fucking emotional bulldozer and I don't know how to deal with that without masking. I'm tired. No...tired is something good, its worn muscles and burned skin. Tired is a difficult puzzle that you'll pick up again in the morning. I am fucking WEARY. I am whatever level of exhaustion where it just becomes permanent.

#autism

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erigold13261 · 1 year ago

Note

I can see the FRAU kids (Sayu crew, 1010 and Yinu) becoming like the kid from “Bitter Choco Decoration” by Syudou! it’s literally about killing your inner child and fitting into society’s expectations

English cover by rachie https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=6G7ilxWNG9o

I do the things I do so I won’t be trusting, and so I won’t be loving, I’ll never hope for anything

Even then, I’ll go along acting very carefully

Ego never growing, I don’t want them to know me

And

Bitter choco decoration

I’ll kill my ego and my heart, and put them in the ground

Bitter choco decoration

I guess I grew up in the end, hey Mom, look at me now

OOF

Oh no this is a REALLY good song!

And you are definitely right about this fitting Yinu, Sayu Crew, and 1010. Though I would say in different levels with Yinu being the most fitting overall.

Like right off the bat, the title alone being "Bitter Choco Decoration" shows that you are only supposed to enjoy looking at the product, not actually savoring it (I don't me savoring in a weird way, but it's the best word I could come up with atm).

Basically a "look, don't touch" because once you get a taste of the substance/see the actual personality of the person, you will be disgusted, make a face, spit them out and walk away.

Yinu, Sayu (and the crew), and 1010 are just made to be looked at and enjoyed on a superficial level now. You aren't supposed to actually get to know them. They aren't supposed to be people anymore. Just idols and musicians for the world to faun over.

Because once you see the bitter personalities that all these people have, you aren't going to care about them anymore (like a parasocial relationship I guess).

One of the first things that stuck out to me was the lines "I do the things I do so I won't be hurting // and so I'm not a bully, I won't give in to murdering." To me these lines can be taken in 2 different ways, one that appeals to Yinu's character more and one that appeals to the Crew's characters more.

First is that Yinu is doing things to make others happy so that she can be happy with herself (mainly for her mom's happiness). She is literally not a bully at all, trying not to act spoiled but also sometimes has intrusive thoughts that she doesn't want to give in to.

Then there is the Crew who do what they want to make them feel better. This is them actually being bullies but they are in denial about them being bullies because it's all just "jokes" "pranks" and all in the name of "having a little fun" (usually at Yinu's or 1010's expense).

It's hard to really talk about all three of these groups because there is so much in this song, but they are all playing parts. The lines "I'll say a joke or two and // Talk in such a way that'll make you wanna' stay" is something I can see all three groups doing.

They are all acting in ways they think will allow them to survive. Some want to survive with a bit more happiness in life (such as Yellow, White, and the Crew) while others are content with just surviving with the bare minimum (Yinu, Green, Red, and Blue). Anything to make life a bit less hard, such as acting a certain way, is good enough for the most part.

The main chorus kinda twists my analysis of the title itself. Mainly appearing that the groups are the ones who have to eat the bitter choco decoration instead of being one. Mainly seen in the lines in the first chorus "Be sure to eat it 'till it's gone and don't you say a word" and "A picky eater through and through you still have much to learn."

These lines do add to my point that these characters are putting on a show (both for the public and their coworkers) at being good little souls. But it's an uncomfortable situation for them, similar to having to eat bitter medicine. The only difference is that medicine is good for you while the choco decoration is for show and has no real substance to it. It's not helping them to put on this play and hide who they are, but if they act like a "picky eater" then they are acting more like children and have to learn the ways of adults.

Even the end of the first chorus and end of the song show that these characters can't talk to others like adults would. They will try but realize they aren't able to properly say what they want or are looked down on and end up saying "never mind" and hold their tongues.

After the first chorus ends, I think that whole stretch before the very fast part shows a lot more of 1010 and maybe a bit of Yinu. Again, they are playing parts, but they are also making sure no one gets close to them. They are saying what people want to hear, basically trying to manipulate the people around them.

They are trying to make everyone around them like them to an extent so they can have more freedom and less pain. 1010 will "praise them very highly, admire all their qualities" so that they are "coming off politely" in the hopes of making life easier to deal with.

The problem with this though is that they are a ruined display basically. Like if Yinu is a lovely bunch of chocolate roses that are starting to melt and the Sayu Crew are some choco seashells with a few cracks in them, then 1010 are a broken pile of chocolate bits trying to be formed into something pretty.

They, specifically Blue, fucked up their chance at being seen as a beautiful display. Visually they can look okay, but everyone KNOW they are a bitter choco decoration. There is no illusion that they could be sweet and something to really enjoy.

Of course some people still see this display and want to eat it, loving it, but the people closer to the display find it disgusting and want to throw it in the trash. The only thing stopping them from doing so is Neon J ability to continuously make a semi-decent choco display that can trick people far away that this is still a desert to enjoy.

Now onto the fast part. A mix of all three groups can be found here. Each one are bound in their own prison that they participate in (both a prison made of outside sources as well as internal sources). Basically these characters can were made in a way similar to tempered chocolate, where a lot of precision and patience was put into making them the best thing for NSR. But now that that patience is wearing thin, these groups can't really melt so they are on the verge of snapping because of the pressure.

They were made to look good for the public, and now that is their prison. Just decorations for NSR that are going to be snapped and remixed until they are molded to the proper image. And once they are found out to be bitter, or are no longer appetizing, they are gonna be thrown away.

Like this can be absolutely seen in the line "They're gonna' leave you far behind, their art forever tainted." Like that line is literally what NSR is going to do to these characters. It's a huge prison that these characters are in, with lots of baggage and trauma that is going to chew them up and spit them out once the taste of bitterness become too much for the public and NSR to deal with.

The lines "Way back at the start, with dreams, I could impress // Now it's tossed aside, no one cares, no one obsessed" is another version of this that shows the downfall of NSR and these characters. They all started NSR with such high hopes. To have fun, get out of a shitty situation, to perform, to be loved. And now they are realizing that once no one cares or are obsessed with them anymore, they are going to be tossed aside.

The next few lines are also pretty important.

"Sometimes we say no but we're always meaning yes" shows how none of these characters are actually allowed to say "no" and even if they do ever say "no" then it's not going to be taken seriously. Not by Tatiana, not by Mama, not by Neon J, not by Eve. These characters just need to do what they are told and to not question it.

And when they do that, you get the lines of "'Hey, I gotta' say that today we were amazed. // Got a knack for things like that that could // Blow us all away'" where it's praising them for being puppets. I think this can be a type of "love bombing" where there will absolutely be times where someone (specifically Tatiana) will just give a shit ton or praise to any of these characters at random intervals to try and keep them content and happy with this line of work (yes Tatiana will even love bomb 1010, but it's a bit easier to see she doesn't mean it to them than it is when she does it to Yinu or the Crew, but 1010 don't care because it is a rare moment where they don't have to be terrified of her, so they accept this praise and continue to work).

The pretty slow part about "Love in season, give a reason... // Love in feeling, give a meaning... // F.U.C.K.Y.O.U" seems like a doubt each of these characters have in their heads. How they are supposed to show love in a certain way, or that there has to be a reason to receive love, otherwise there's no real meaning or feeling behind it.

They all have a part of them that does want to say "fuck you" to everyone and everything around them. Some of them say it to certain people (White and Yellow to the rest of 1010, the Crew to Yinu) while others haven't said it at all but are absolutely thinking it.

The last chorus is pretty much all of these characters giving up parts of themselves so that they are what is needed of them. They want to "be all that you need, [they] want to make it last" while throwing their feelings away ("burn it all away, [their] feelings into ash") and killing their sense of worth and self esteem (their ego) to bury it away in order to conform to the wishes of those older and in power.

"I guess I grew up in the end // Hey mom, look at me now!" is definitely a line that resonates with all of these characters in a certain way (though the word "mom" isn't the part to focus on, but a parent/guardian instead).

All three of these groups had to grow up in a weird way. Yinu went from a spoiled kid who got everything she wanted to a teen who thinks that if she doesn't take on all this burden and suffer silently then her mother won't love her or Mama will suffer on her behalf.

The Sayu Crew all have negative relationships with their older family members (both parental and sibling). They are all basically the breadwinners for each of their families and need to act like mature adults in order to keep their jobs and the minimal love that their families barely give to them.

And 1010, though they were never dolls in this AU, they had to "grow up" in a sense that they started from scratch with sentience. All they knew was war and fighting, and now they were thrown into a whole new environment where they had to act like lovable young adults for random ass fans.

The "Hey mom, look at me now!" line, to me, is less about actually calling to a mother figure, but to someone who raised you or showed you how to navigate life. These characters want that specific person in their life to take a look at them now and basically ask "are you proud of what I became?"

And for most of them, that answer is actually going to be no. Which would give a kind of closure to each of these groups because maybe then they can stop acting if they knew what they were doing wasn't what was wanted of them. But because they are so deep into this lie and play, they don't want to ask that question because if that person in their life ends up saying "yes" then they are forever stuck having to play that role until they slowly die.

And even if they die "Hell will always follow me, even when I'm dead" is a line that shows even death isn't going to set these characters free (which is why I think, as I stated in the "Nothing's Working Out" ask, Green is the only one who is okay with dying. These other characters know death isn't the option so they keep playing the game and pretending to be a perfect little choco decoration).

The line "Please, I wanna' feel like I did back as a kid" is the idealized past that all these characters think they have (or wish that they had in 1010's case).

"Not a single piece of clothing to cover what I did," to me, is a line about cutting or self harm. Something I don't think Yinu participates in at all (yet). Some of the Sayu Crew possibly have stuff to hide using clothing, and while 1010 don't have bodies that can scar, they do have their own self harm practices that, if they were organic, would need clothing to cover.

I don't know what to think of the last line (or like second to last line). Specifically the "Weren't you that preoccupi-" line. Because it definitely has some significance to the song, but I'm unfortunately not keen on to what it is.

Though honestly, the line before it "Hey you look familiar, though it's been a couple years," makes me think of a future where these characters get away from NSR and any shitty family situation but are recognized years later in the street. They are asked if they are who they were and end up shutting down that conversation in order to absolutely try and forget their past (they want to forget it entirely instead of deal with their trauma to try and move past it).

This song is overall really good and really fast. Mostly reminding me of Yinu with parts more heavily geared towards the Crew or 1010.

#nsrtalk #song #eritalks #noart #asks

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shiruuuuuu · 2 years ago

Text

#SocialMediaPlatformSmith

GOOD AND BAD OF SOCIAL PLATFORMS

Multitasking has become a common theme in our lives. It’s a wonder how we manage it all.

We depend on our smartphones for work, school, our personal and social lives. When was the last time you left home without your phone and kept on going? The internet has become a significant part of our daily lives. So too has social media.

And it is having an impact on today’s teens.

Social media usage

Back in 2005, when social media was still in its infancy, only about 5 percent of users in the United States were involved in social media. In 2019, that number grew to about 70 percent.

Pew Research Center surveyed social media usage and popularity among US adults early in 2019. The survey found that while the most-used social platforms for adults are YouTube and Facebook; teens prefer SnapChat and Instagram, while TikTok is reportedly the fastest growing social network among younger users.

Social media use is nearly universal among today’s teens. Pew Research Center reports 97 percent of 13- to 17-year-olds use at least one of seven major online platforms.

The amount of time spent on social sites is astounding. One report indicates the average teen ages 13 to 18 spends about nine hours on social media each day; tweens ages 8 to 12 are on for about six hours a day.

Like most things, using social media has its positives (the good), its cautionary tales (the bad), and dangers (the ugly) that lurk and impact the lives of many, but especially teens.

Mindcast: Healthy Mind, Healthy Child Podcast

A Podcast from the experts at Bradley Hospital, leaders in mental health care for children.

Listen to the podcast

Why is social media good?

Social media and technology offer us greater convenience and connectivity:

staying connected with family and friends worldwide via email, text, FaceTime, etc.

quick access to information and research

banking and bill pay at our fingertips

online learning, job skills, content discovery (YouTube)

involvement in civic engagement (fundraising, social awareness, provides a voice)

great marketing tools

opportunities for remote employment

Social media can be a good thing, but if teens ever feel uncomfortable about something they see or read on social, they should trust their own feelings and talk to someone – a parent, a teacher, or another trusted adult. Bullying, threats and cruelty on social media are all signs that the person doing those things needs help.

Why is social media bad?

Along with the good comes the bad. With all of its benefits, the nature of social media presents a range of potential issues.

•Online vs Reality. Social media itself is not the problem. It is the way people use it in place of actual communication and in-person socializing. “Friends” on social media may not actually be friends, and may even be strangers.

•Increased usage. The more time spent on social media can lead to cyberbullying, social anxiety, depression, and exposure to content that is not age appropriate.

•Social Media is addicting. When you’re playing a game or accomplishing a task, you seek to do it as well as you can. Once you succeed, your brain will give you a dose of dopamine and other happiness hormones, making you happy. The same mechanism functions when you post a picture to Instagram or Facebook. Once you see all the notifications for likes and positive comments popping up on your screen, you’ll subconsciously register it as a reward. But that’s not all, social media is full of mood-modifying experiences.

•Fear of Missing Out. FOMO has become a common theme, and often leads to continual checking of social media sites. The idea that you might miss out on something if you’re not online can affect your mental health.

•Self-image issues. Social media sites provide tools that allow people to earn others’ approval for their appearance and the possibility to compare themselves to others. It can be associated with body image concerns. The “selfieholics” and people who spend most of their time posting and scrolling are the ones most vulnerable to this. In fact, most college girls who use Facebook at least five times a day are likely to link their self-worth to their looks. That doesn’t mean that the main problem is social media; it only provides a medium for it, which further elevates the problem. It also promotes the same sort of behavior to others.

Social media and bullying

Sadly, there is an ugly side to all that technology offers. While bullying is not a new concept, social media and technology have brought bullying to a new level. It becomes a more constant, ever-present threat -- cyberbullying. The State of Rhode Island anti-bullying laws & regulations define bullying and cyberbullying as follows:

“Bullying” means the use by one or more students of a written, verbal or electronic expression or a physical act or gesture or any combination thereof directed at a student that:

• causes physical or emotional harm to the student or damage to the student's property

• places the student in reasonable fear of harm to himself/herself or of damage to his/her property

• creates an intimidating, threatening, hostile, or abusive educational environment for the student

• infringes on the rights of the student to participate in school activities

• materially and substantially disrupts the education process or the orderly operation of a school

“Cyberbullying” means bullying through the use of technology or any electronic communication, which shall include, but not be limited to, any transfer of signs, signals, writing, images, sounds, data, texting or intelligence of any nature transmitted in whole or in part by a wire, radio, electromagnetic, photo electronic or photo optical system, including, but not limited to, electronic mail, Internet communications, instant messages or facsimile communications.

BULLYING STATISTICS

Every 7 minutes a child is bullied. Unfortunately, intervention is rare, with an adult intervening in only four percent of cases, and a peer in 11 percent. An astonishing 85 percent of all cases of bullying are not addressed.

The following are just some statistics on how common bullying and cyberbullying have become: According to StopBullying.org:

•One out of four (25 percent) teens are bullied, while up to 43 percent have been bullied while online.

•Nine out of ten LGBTQ students experienced harassment at school and online. Biracial and multiracial youth are more likely to be victimized than youth who identify with a single race. Kids who are obese, gay, or have disabilities are more likely to be bullied than other children.

•58 percent have not told their parents or an adult about something mean or hurtful that happened to them online.

•5.4 million children stay home on any given day because they fear being bullied.

7 Ways To Stop The Negative Effects of Social Media:

1. Take a Break

Taking a break from social media allows you to rest, recharge, and regroup.

2. Create an Intention or Purpose

My intent for using Facebook was to keep in touch with friends and acquaintances near and far.

3. Connect with Those That Lift You Up, not Put You Down

They pressured me into accepting Facebook friend requests at my worst job ever.

4. Change Your Perspective

There are at least two ways to look at photos, status updates, and comments.

5. Keep Your Content Positive

Negative content can trigger negative emotions.

It can cause you to assume the worst about everything.

Worse, you might have difficulty accepting good things in your life because you don’t believe you deserve them.

6. Contribute to the Cause

According to a study, users who are actively posting, commenting, liking, and sharing content are more likely to feel a sense of bonding and inclusiveness with others on social media.

7. Remember That You Are In-Charge

Ultimately, you are responsible for your emotions.

It is not Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, or other forms of social media.

Although there are important benefits, social media can also provide platforms for bullying and exclusion, unrealistic expectations about body image and sources of popularity, normalization of risk-taking behaviors.

REMEMBER NOT TO BULLY, AND OFCOURSE DON'T ALLOW YOURSELF TO BE BULLIED.

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versadies · 2 years ago

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mindless dreams (childe x gn!reader)

SALUTATIONS. mindless dreams

ADDRESSED. childe (w/ gn!childhood-friend!reader)

STAMP. in which childe always thinks of you, longing to meet you again after not seeing you for so long, only to find you at your worst state of all.

CONTENT. angst/no-comfort, mentions of violence, mentions of human experiments, dottore is his own warning, spoilers to childe's background and lore, grammar errors (?)

POST-SCRIPT. here's another angst story from me once again... im going after everyone now >:)

LINKS. masterlist \ taglist

For as long as Childe could remember, you’re always on his mind.

When he was in the Abyss, his mind wandered back to you, wondering how you’ve been, whether or not you’re looking for him, and what your reaction will be when he finally finds a way to come back.

When he was in the military training of the Fatui, his mind wandered back to you, wondering how you’ve been, whether or not you’d be proud of what he’s doing, and what your reaction will be when he becomes a part of the Fatui.

When he became a Fatui Harbinger, his mind still wandered back to you, wondering how you’ve been, whether or not you’d be proud of what he’s doing, and what your reaction will be when you find out of his achievement.

Some of his wanderings are left unanswered, for he couldn’t contact you.

He reunited with you at last when he came back from the Abyss. You gave him the warmest hug he needed after going through so much for three months, only to find out from you that he’s been gone for three days. He didn’t dare to question the time, he’s just happy to finally see you again (even when you looked worried from how there is no light in his eyes).

Since then, trouble follows where he goes. Of course, he always makes sure you’re out of harm’s way, but despite that, you worry for him because of how much he changed. You never brought it up though, you didn’t want to ask what happened to him when he disappeared, not wanting to face his wrath just like the other kids who picked on him.

When he was taken to the Fatui and had to go through military training, he didn’t protest about it, knowing it’ll satisfy the battles he craved for so long. It breaks his heart that he won’t see you everyday though. That’s why he was so determined to get this over with as soon as possible!

The two of you constantly send letters to one another. You even gave him a small painting copy of you that was painted by a painter that your parents hired for your portrait, and he kept it in his person for life.

It wasn’t until one day when you suddenly stopped sending letters.

He doesn’t recall writing something that’d make you uncomfortable, besides rejecting your idea of visiting the Fatui headquarters to see him. Perhaps you were just busy…?

As days went by, his worries grew stronger. Where could you be? Why haven’t you sent any letters anymore?

In a blur, time flew fast and Childe became a Fatui Harbinger.

The first thing he did was to visit his village as soon as possible, wanting to see you again after so long. When he visited your home, all he could see was nothing more but an abandoned home.

His heart sank when he entered your home that’s full of dust and empty spaces. It’s as if you and your family never existed here…

When Childe brought you up when he reunited with his family, they all refused to answer him, which frustrated him to no end. Why can’t they tell him where his childhood friend is?

To this day, his family still didn’t tell him of your whereabouts. Either due to forgetting as to who he’s talking about (which he knows are just pretend), or due to the silence they give him whenever he mentions you.

He often imagines what could’ve been if you’re here with him now. He would’ve been happier than ever! He could imagine you running up to him whenever he comes back to his hometown from his missions, you writing letters to him with him replying back as soon as possible like old times, you loving the gifts he sent you while he’s away from missions, and overall, he imagines you being with him — be it as his lover or as his dear friend.

He prefers the former though.

There’s never a day where he reminisces the times he had with you when he was only but a child with dreams. Perhaps in his heart, you’re his dream. And just like how you disappeared in his life, so did his dream.

However, deep in his heart, he has a new dream. He dreams to see you again someday, maybe when he’s traveling around Teyvat for missions and somehow encounters you by the bustling crowds. He believes that he’d recognize your brightful eyes and smile even if you look way different than what you look like back then.

To this day, he keeps the painting you gave him from your letter, often admiring it with a dreamy sigh.

The day when he finally saw you again was the worst day of his life.

Not even his experience in the Abyss could be compared to how he felt when he finally saw you… in the laboratory of the Doctor.

Childe is not one to visit the lab of the second harbinger, but he regrets not visiting it sooner, especially when he looks at your tragic state now.

There you were, sitting on a seat staring at the void. You’re wearing a fatui uniform, and despite still looking the same but older (and perhaps hollow), Childe couldn’t believe he’s staring at you.

He refuses to believe he’s looking at you, his childhood friend and his first love.

When he looks at your eyes, he sees nothing but a vast void that shows no light.

You showed no reaction when you saw him, you could only stare at him with no emotions. It’s as if you don’t recognize him at all.

“Oh? I see you’ve finally met my experiment.” Dottore says with a grin when he enters his laboratory and spotted the eleventh harbinger standing in front of you. “Meet Test Subject 01902, also known as my helpful assistant.”

The doctor didn’t notice the way Childe’s hands turn into fists when he hears his words. Test subject…? What did he do to you?

All this time, while he was dreaming to meet you again without bothering to look for you anymore, you were stuck with the terrible doctor suffering from his experiments with you the whole time.

He couldn’t imagine what Dottore had done that made you become like this.

“Peculiar thing, aren’t they?” The doctor asks. “I found them standing outside the Fatui Headquarters, looking for someone who goes by Ajax.” He explains, reminiscing the time when he found you looking for someone… For Childe.

Childe could still remember that one last letter you sent to him. You didn’t listen to his warnings when he said to not go visit the headquarters. You were actually visiting him, only to encounter that monster of a harbinger.

Childe feels sick, still staring at you in horror and in devastation. He should’ve looked for you harder. He should’ve visited the doctor’s laboratory sooner. He should’ve suspected that something bad must’ve happened–!

“Poor thing accepted my offer to take them to whoever this Ajax is when it was nothing more than a lie.” The doctor suddenly laughs at the thought. “You should’ve seen the fear in their eyes when I locked them in my laboratory and began my experiment. They should thank me for everything. After all, they’ve become the perfect assistant anyone could ask for–”

Without another hesitation and word, Childe lunges at the doctor, his delusion sparks to light and he sees nothing more but red.

Even if the eleventh harbinger somehow comes out of the laboratory alive, he knows it would do nothing to take back everything you’ve been through for the past few years.

For as long as Childe could remember, you’re always on his mind.

Perhaps this is what regret is.

PENPALS. @scaraslover @saving-for-xiao @dawgimsohot @ragnvdnr @chiruru @aqualesha @renamichii @mrkamisato @shenhesl0ver @serami00 @serenareiss @hiqhkey @emperatris-rinaka @bystander36 @irisxiel @ladycoleigh @034ven @dear-dairiess @owozi8 @hadesaedes @chiro-chiro-kun @hersscherofyatta @mariusvonhangme @yuzuricebun @nejibot @hoshikistarlette @solaaresque @crowbird @lordbugs @flowersforayato @headintheclouddd @estelwrld @giyusimpsassemble @irethepotatosblog @moonlightaangel @alice0blog @shotosbrainrot @sniffoat @chihawari @mxsomn @kuni-kuzushii @jiminscarmex @mitsukii14 @ylimeprive @sachispet @loreleis-world @sn-owo @starforecasts @someonetookmynamelmao @ceylestia @astrequa @ymikkos @reallysporadicarcade @melodyyamino @dudufodd @somberrock @yevenly @lemontum @nghing @shaiah @miss-lady-witch

#genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader #genshin x gn reader #genshin x gender neutral reader #genshin impact x gn reader #genshin impact x gender neutral reader #genshin impact fanfiction #childe x reader #childe x gn reader #childe x gn!reader #childe x gender neutral reader #tartaglia x reader #tartaglia x gn reader #childe x reader angst #childe angst #genshin angst #genshin x reader angst

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jessiarts · 3 years ago

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I don't know who needs to hear this, but no one ever learns from being yelled at.

I've watched from the sidelines of many discourses/"cancellings"/what-have-youse that've happened around the internet and one thing I've noticed is none of the "Internet Public Enemies" ever learned from their mistakes or changed their minds by being bullied, receiving death threats, or threats of cancelling.

At best I've seen rejected public apologies. At worst I've seen people have genuine mental breakdowns and develop intense fear of ever speaking up again in case they accidentally say the wrong thing or their thoughts are misconstrued. Because the human mind is simply not equipped to deal with the very real effect of hundreds of thousands of people very loudly saying how much they hate you and that thing you said.

You know what I have seen change people's minds, though? Kindness.

I know, it sounds corny and not nearly as satisfying for some, but I've genuinely seen more people change their ways of thinking when someone has taken time to have a calm conversation with them instead of screaming back.

I think we need to try more love with these interactions. The goal should be to get the other person to grow as a person, not to "win" because you made the "bad person" leave the internet. Most people genuinely don't want to be hurtful, they just aren't informed.

The best way I can put it is to think about it like raising a child.

When a child says or does something bad, and they get screamed at and/or smacked, they don't "learn their lesson." The person who yelled at and/or hit them only took out their own frustration on that child, they didn't teach them anything. The child doesn't learn why what they said or did was hurtful or why they shouldn't do it again, they only become afraid of the punishment and usually try to find ways not to get caught the next time. They also just become resentful of the person who screamed at/hit them.

However, when a child says or does something bad and instead they are sat down and talked to like a person about why what they said/did was harmful, they're more likely to learn from that mistake and not do it again. Yes, they may mess up a few more times now and again as they're still learning and not perfect, but as long as you keep coming back to them and calmly explaining to them that what they did wasn't very nice and why, they'll grow as a person and learn they can trust the person who helped them through it.

The same is very much true of adults. I know it can be frustrating when someone who we believe should know better about something doesn't, but we also can't go after everyone like they are a Big Bad Evil for making a mistake either. (Save that energy for corporations.)

Will there be some people who just won't listen no matter how much it's explained why their behavior is hurtful? Of course, but they likely won't be the norm. And it's perfectly ok not to consume the content of someone who makes you uncomfortable. It's ok to state your disappointment and leave them to slip into irrelevance. But I've rarely seen a big flashy announcement for a boycott of a person result in that person believing anything other than they were being persecuted and then doubling down on why their behavior wasn't bad.

It's honestly a very Terminally Online thing to do, assuming everyone is meaning to be a bad person for supporting or saying the wrong things, and propagating the idea that if you mess up you must grovel for forgiveness that will never come because mistakes mean you are inherently bad forever and can never change.

Honestly I believe that's why so many people double down when confronted anymore. The internet has cultivated a culture with no forgiveness. Admitting you were wrong has become weakness in the internet's eyes- Better to double down and show everyone how Right™ you are and really how Wrong™ those bullies who disagree actually are. And if someone does come to change their mind, they're met with jeers for not getting there sooner or for believing the wrong thing in the first place. It's toxic.

We need to allow apologies and encourage growth and guidance. We need to let people know that if people make a mistake they'll still be welcome when they change that behavior. And also that they won't be met with some variation of "See, was that so hard?!" or "FINALLY!" That's important too.

We can't punish the behavior we want to see, and punishment isn't going to help us see that behavior.

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hikari3601 · 3 years ago

Note

Hello! I absolutely love your writing and I have never written a request before so I thought I might ask for a kaeya-childe-zhongli waking up and seeing in the morning sort of thing if that makes sense. Just a wholesome head cannon to brighten people’s days. If you are busy writing other things that is fine but if you do manage to write this I will be very grateful :))

Morning Sunshine

Home page

Pairing | Childe, Kaeya and Zhongli x Reader (separate)

Author’s Note | This took me so long to do. Sorry for being so inactive, I am still alive although barely. I was going to finish this later because of my freaking head, but Hu Tao came home early so in celebration, here you go! Thank you for the request Anon, I really hope that this is ok☺️

Warning | Fluff overload, established relationships(?) and it’s unedited!

Waking up beside you every morning is by far the greatest blessing I will ever receive.

Childe wakes up pretty early every morning, it’s become a habit of his since his days within the lower ranks of the Fatui, but as much as he’s an early bird, Childe doesn’t get up until you do.

Instead, he prefers to watch you sleeping peacefully and it’s at times like these that he would silently thank every Archon for your presence in his life.

Childe would sometimes even daydream about a child or two soundly sleeping in between the two of you, but those were just his wishful thoughts -he would never force you into doing something you were uncomfortable with.

Nonetheless, while you were fast asleep he’d whispered little ‘I love you’s and other praises into your ear while pulling you closer.

—————

As you stirred awake within the comfort of your shared bed, you felt the arm around your waist shift -pulling you closer towards his chest. The shapes that were drawn on the small of your back almost succeeded in lulling you back into your deep slumber, but the warm voice beside your ear stole you away from sleep’s grasp.

“Morning Sunshine, did you dream of me again?”

You didn’t have the capacity to answer -still trying to rid yourself of slumbers’ remnants, so instead, you hummed, regardless of his question.

With his arm still holding you, you contemplated going back to sleep but you remembered the day ahead of you and shifted once again.

“How about I make you some breakfast today since I’m off?”

Once again you hummed in response -this time in agreement. Childe’s breakfasts were absolutely delicious and enough to make you open your dazed eyes.

You met his gaze with your own and felt the heat rise in your cheeks at the sight of his gentle, loving smile.

Right now he wasn’t Tartaglia of the Eleven Harbingers nor was he Childe, he was just Ajax -your Ajax, the very same one who would steal kisses from you throughout the day and sway to an old Snezhnayan song with you at night. He was the one you fell for and the one you adored waking up to every morning.

Good luck getting him out of bed. Personally, I believe Kaeya persuade you into sleeping for another five minutes, but of course those five minutes would turn into thirty.

The two of you typically wake up around the same time, but stay in bed until the one gathers enough willpower to get up —and knowing Kaeya, it’s usually you.

Breakfasts are always entertaining as the two of you are either throwing flirty remarks at each other or discussing the events of the previous day; with Kaeya around there is never a dull moment, so you guys almost always have some form of content to talk about.

But on those quieter mornings, the two of you go through your morning routines in comfortable silence until one of you departs for your daily duties.

—————

It was one of those quieter days. The both of you were still tired from the previous days’ events, from helping out with commissions to endless piles of paperwork -needless to say, six hours of sleep each, was not fun, but the small touches and tender kisses between the two of you were comforting. You sat in front of the dresser, fixing your appearance when you felt his soft skin snuggle into the crook of your neck from behind. He was fully dressed and most likely about to leave soon but he was yet to wear his eye patch so you gazed into his mismatched eyes -feeling as if you were being pulled in by his star-shaped irises. “What’s your day looking like?” He hummed as he proceeded to pepper your skin with kisses. Still looking at him, a thoughtful look glazed your eyes before you responded. “Will you be back by dinner?” You asked, knowing full well that Kaeya’s schedule was always full early in the week despite his easygoing attitude. “I’ll have lunch with you, but dinner might be a problem.” He hummed, his voice vibrating through your skin. You’d most likely wait up for him if you were able to, you thought. Turning your attention back to him, you placed a hand on his smooth hair -unable to help the butterflies that spread throughout your entire being -you really loved this man.

Zhongli will either wake up really early or sleep in with you.

I feel like he would have a set morning routine that he had perfected over the centuries and would follow religiously. “I will have order!”

Mornings with Zhongli are typically peaceful, with the two of you either getting ready for the day’s work ahead or cuddling in bed.

Occasionally, you’d wake up to breakfast in bed whenever he managed to get out before you noticed.

On weekends the two of you would spend more time together in the comfort of your bed, simply relishing the presence of each other. Weekdays, on the other hand, are a little less tranquil although still quite calm.

—————

“Good morning.” You smiled, watching as he peeled his eyes open to reveal a pair of bronze, sleep-dazed orbs.

“Morning, Love.” He responded.

For the next couple of moments, the two of you lay beside each other in complete silence -just looking into each other’s eyes and silently sending out words of gratitude for being able to be with each other.

You slightly shifted your position and breathed out a lighthearted chuckle, earning a curious stare from your lover.

“I’m grateful, to be able to wake up beside you every morning and see your lovely smile -I’m truly the luckiest person in the world.

Zhongli gazed at you with a look as equally loving as yours and pulled you in for a sweet, chaste kiss that, although fleeting, told you of all the words and feelings of endearment that he held within -solely for you.

Zhongli was brilliant when it came to describing himself and his emotions -this was a fact that none could deny, but whenever you came along, it felt as if all the words in the world could never be enough to describe the love he held for you.

“I managed to save quite a bit of Mora this month, so how about we go out for breakfast, it’s been a while, hasn’t it?”

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anxiouspotatorants · 4 years ago

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It is time. It is finally time for the new Suicide Squad rant (and spoilers will be plentiful):

As someone who was into DC Comics and comics in the mid to late 2010s and had so much hype for the first Suicide Squad movie only to be let down, I was so nervous for this one. I knew it was going to be a roller coaster, but whether I would come out happy or disappointed was up in the air. Having just seen it I will say this: I have no idea if this was a good movie-movie. It was insane. The comedy. The violence. The high emotion. I’m still trying to take it all in. But one thing I do know is that this is an amazing Suicide Squad movie. Gunn and co took the best parts of the comic concept and went batshit with it and that is how this property should be handled (in my opinion). Screw edgelordisms, we need full on insanity free of aiming for shock-value or sexy brutality we want chaos baby.

Starting the whole movie as they did, with Savant as the POV for a mission (or part of the mission) that just goes to hell immediately and kills off so many before the title arrives is the perfect way to start this movie. Like the second I realized this was how they were doing it I was just smiling from ear to ear, this is the spirit of the property.

Part of me wishes we got more Amanda Waller, but what we had was impeccable. Then again, this is Viola Davis we’re talking about, and if she was born to play any character in a superhero story, it is Amanda Waller.

And points to her tech team, introducing them with the death bets was just a lovely way to show how regular this is and how awful everyone is in this movie.

I’m not going to pretend like Deadshot and Bloodsport didn’t have the exact same character- and plot premises… but I will say that Bloodsport felt better executed.

I love that they kept some of the past members and not just Harley. Rick Flag got to have a full personality and interactions with his team members and to be a true leader and it made me so happy for someone who initially did not give a single shit about his character. The Harley friendship? The Dubois friendship? The friendship with that guerilla leader? Amazing. The one American soldier in fictional media I genuinely like. You go Mr Flag.

The new members were… they were insane in the best way. Gone are the shitty stereotypes and present are some of the wackiest creations to ever grace the mainstream movie-sphere (aka the slightly less normal comic creations): A man who has to shoot out polka dots two times a day so as not to die from a space virus. A giant child murdering weasel. A guy who detaches his limbs and slaps people with said detached limbs. King Shark. The second person to command rats with a fancy gadget. They are all crazy and all weird and all more or less morally repulsive people and I love them.

The amount of times I did a double take over the soundtrack I swear. Jessie Reyez? The Pixies? It was so much fun to pick up on once I did.

Was the depiction of a vague Latin American country stereotypical? Yes. Was the secret American involvement predictable and felt mildly patronizing from a non-American, part Latina point of view? Yep. But damn it if I didn’t have a good time with those stereotypes and laugh my ass off at how well executed some were. I don’t know if it was meant as parody, but that one secretary has me thinking so — and if so I am pleased.

Speaking of Latino dictators Harley’s one day romance with one of the villains was something I never knew I needed. Like it was so perfect for Harley that when it happened I almost hit myself for not realizing that this kind of plot should be a normal thing for Harley. And the end of it? Perfect not only in this standalone movie, but also in conjunction with the first and with BoP.

The Taika Waititi cameo??? Oh my god??? I did not expect that and I love it?? Sir, What We Do in the Shadows is impeccable.

Rick Flag’s death actually surprised me. It shouldn’t as this is Suicide Squad, but I kind of expected him to be on Harley’s level of unkillable (because let’s face it, no one kills Harley). What I will say is that his death was good and his final words and actions made me love him all the more. I hope this spawns more Rick Flag content, or at least inspires me to look at what already exists, if he already is as this movie made him (it’s been ages since I read one of the Suicide Squad reboot comics okay).

Starro. How can a villain be so wacky and so terrifying at the same time? I did not expect a literal alien starfish to have more terrifying powers and a more tragic plot execution than Enchantress. But here we are. And that damn star just wanted to be floating in space, and instead it was stuck getting revenge by killing and puppeteering human corpses. Wow that thing was creepier the more you think about it.

I don’t know what I think about Polka Dot Man. I loved watching him on screen but also damn those mommy-issues were on a new level. Not just in his backstory but how he literally sees her in every person around him that was insane. Very funny but like also the kind that makes you laugh just because you’re uncomfortable and don’t know how else to releive the tension.

When Waller got knocked out by a staff member I immediately thought «oh my god Amanda Waller is going to kill half the staff for this», so I’m mildly surprised and disappointed that I didn’t get to see that happen. But also I should maybe expect something like this in a potential future Suicide Squad movie. We can’t have everything in a movie as packed as this.

Peacemaker was very horrible and worked really well. Don’t really have much to say about him, not because I didn’t enjoy him but because I already feel like the film itself has said it for me. But the planting and payoff for his death? Chef’s. Kiss.

Harley’s wardrobe was beautiful. Ratcatcher 2’s combat outfit felt like a steampunk plague dream. Bloodsport’s mask was supercool. Rick Flag’s t-shirt was amazing. But the best little outfit was the Mafalda-keychain and her red dress, hands down. Oh and King Shark’s fake moustache finger moment.

King Shark is shaped like a friend I don’t care how many people he ate alive on screen he looks so huggable. It feels like wanting to pet a bear. You know it will kill you but damn it look at those paws and those cute eyes!

I really need to give it to not just James Gunn but the entire production team for this movie. The aesthetic was perfect. The story was the right blend of whimsical and violent. The finished product was a literal rollercoaster and I mean that in a good way. If superhero movies have to be like amusement parks, I hope they’re more like this one and BoP.

I’ll finish on the note that while I think this movie was great and hopefully a step in the right direction for the DCU/DCEU (as in stop trying to play Marvel’s game and just do your own thing/ let your creative teams run wild and free), it is not the first step. Cathy Yan, Birds of Prey and the production team for it took a step first, and they deserve due credit and attention. If you loved this Suicide Squad movie and haven’t watched BoP yet, do so. Because they really are in the same ballpark while doing things in slightly different ways. And any good DCEU movie deserves more attention so the studios know that creativity and risks should be rewarded. I want more DC movies like this, not necessarily in genre but in creative risks. I want a Black Canary rock movie. I want Alfred in a reverse heist movie alone in the batcave against Gotham villains. I want Gotham Academy on screen play by play from the comics. I want a fully animated psychedelic-like Khalid Nassour as Dr. Fate movie. I want elevated horror movie Constantine. I want weird ass Lois Lane journalist movies with a heavy side of Superman. And I want DC movies I didn’t even know I wanted.

Support creativity in mainstream comic movies. Help me become a DC fan and happy about it again.

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shokobuns · 4 years ago

Text

“𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐝𝐨𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐩𝐛𝐫𝐨?”

your irritating step brother likes to come in your room during your zoom classes.

PAIRING: stepbro!gojo satoru x f!reader

GENRE(S): smut, quarantine!au (au? LMAO), college!au, taboo

WORD COUNT: 2.7k

WARNING(S): darkish, smut, drug use (weed), high sex, stepcest, taboo, slight dubcon, slight manipulation, exhibitionism (if you squint), sensory deprivation (blindfold), degradation, size kink, unprotected sex, creampie, oral (f receiving), squirting, dacryphilia (if you squint)

(A/N): this rly do be my first time using proper capitalization huh, anyways all characters, SORRY I FORGOT TO ADD THE READ MORE I FIXED IT

More.

One thing you easily learned about Satoru was the fact he wasn’t easy to satisfy. He’s demanding, cocky, all the while being nonchalant. He rarely exerts effort, but gets the desired results. He’s arrogant, but it’s nearly impossible to point out a flaw to counter it at all.

It makes your head hurt. It makes your teeth clench.

When you make eye contact, you make sure to stare back daggers. When you’re forced to talk to him, your voice stays monotone and expressionless. When you’re in a room with him for more than five minutes, your earbuds are already out, drowning out the sound of his voice. But it’s all difficult when you’re under the same roof.

Knock. Knock.

You roll your eyes at the sound of your step brother knocking your door, wondering what the hell he wants now. At this point, he’s probably just trying to annoy you, poke at your sides until he gets attention, any kind of attention, all just to satisfy his boredom.

Your calm demeanor and sharp tongue has always contrasted with Satoru’s teasing attitude. He’s always seemingly trying to provoke you, trying to pry apart the walls you’ve barricaded yourself in. His personality never rubbed you in the right way from the day your dad surprised you with a dinner with your new brother and your new mom. It didn’t matter anyways, you thought. You’d be going off to university soon enough.

The pandemic ran over all of your plans like a truck.

Better yet, your parents still had work without the option of staying home, leaving you and Satoru home alone for a little over eight hours a day. When he wasn’t in class or tutoring his juniors, he was knocking at your door, most likely red-eyed, though you can’t see it, and relaxed. Despite his persistence, you rarely let him in no matter how insistent he is in “getting to know his new lil sister.”

“Go away, Satoru.”

Behind the door, he pouts while you scribble down notes from the screenshared presentation. He comes in anyways, reeking of marijuana and cologne, half of his shirt buttons undone. You steal a small glance before once again glueing your eyes to your computer screen. The voice of your professor bores you, but you’re hyper aware of Satoru’s presence as he makes himself comfortable on your bed. “Get the fuck off! You stink!” You yell, turning off your camera before throwing a pencil right at him.

He catches it mid air with ease, relaxing his head on your pillows while fiddling with one of your many Sanrio plushies. “Can I have this?” he asks, holding one up as you contemplate its value in your head.

“If it gets you out of my room, then sure.” you reply in a monotone voice, turning back to your notes.

“You’re no fun,” he mumbles, rolling over to lay on his side with the plushie in his arms, “Is that organic chem?”

“Yeah, can you go now?”

“I’ll be quiet, princess. Don’t worry about me, just wanna know what my lil sis is up to.” He waits for a response, but is only rewarded with a huff.

It stays like that for the next ten minutes, him watching your professor’s lecture, you scrambling to write all of the information on the slides as he continues the fast paced lesson. You’re hyper focused on your class, putting in your effort to absorb the entirety of the content. In your mind, the only people in your room are your and your computer. “You know, you don’t have to understand everything all at once,” a voice speaks up from behind you, causing you to purse your lips in annoyance, “It’s easier to learn when you’re actually paying attention to the lecture instead of focusing on trying to get everything down.

“We get it, Satoru. You have straight A’s and you’re naturally good at everything.”

“Hey, you’re getting advice from an aspiring teacher. Don’t need to use that tone with me, Princess.” He mumbles, rolling to his back on the bed, “Just tryna help you out in my free time.”

“I don’t need your help.”

He stays silent while you go back to drawing some of your basic compounds. Ethanol, methanol, propane, all of it. Your scribbles are messy and they progressively fill out the page in your notebook. You hear a tsk behind you, rolling your eyes as you prepare for another criticism from Satoru. Sure, he was probably right, but you refuse to feed into his ego. “Does he not link the slides to you guys or something?” he asks, this time with a friendlier tone.

“He does.” you reply, swiveling your chair until you’re facing him. He’s laying on his side again, his shirt spilling off his shoulder as your breath hitches at the sight. The blindfold is snug against his face, his hair pushed up. You’re sure that the stink of marijuana has rubbed onto your sheets and you make a mental note to wash them after class. “Then get high with me.”

“I’m in the middle of class, dumbass.”

“But you can always look at the slides later.” he suggests, “Plus, you’ve looked super stressed lately. Wonder why.”

Because of you, you want to say, but you stop yourself, opting to stay silent while pondering the offer. “Sure.”

He excitedly walks back to his room, returning to your bed seconds later with a joint between his fingertips. “This your first time?”

“Nah.”

“Ooooo,” he hums like a child, “That’s what you’re up to when we’re not around, huh?” he teases and you shake your head with a smile forming on your face.

“I guess.”

He shrugs, holding the joint up to your lips and lighting up the tip. You suck in the smoke into your lungs, holding it in, before exhaling out the screen door of your window. He takes a hit, opening his mouth and inhaling through his nose then passing it back to you. Your professor’s lecture fades into background noise as you fixate on Satoru, finally giving him the attention he’s been craving for weeks. He makes a mental note to offer you weed the next time he’s overcome by boredom.

The high hits you almost immediately. You’ve never had anything this strong and it’s liberating. You feel weightless, but your eyelids feel heavy. Your face is awfully warm and lifted and your vision gets more and more blurry by the second. The intoxication is pleasant, the present worries in your head being cut off as you focus on what’s right in front of you.

Satoru.

Satoru, your dear, irritating step brother who was kind enough to share the weed he stashes in his drawer. It’s getting harder and harder to hate him and you can’t reason why you felt so many negative emotions that you projected onto him at all. Sure, your room reeks and it’s all because of him, but the sight of him laying on your bed in a shirt that barely covers up his upper body makes your underwear feel uncomfortable. You don't know where it’s coming from, but shutting it out was easy when you’re sober. Key word: sober.

You stand from your desk, making your way to your bed and laying next to him. Both of you face each other, easily getting comfortable, warmth radiating off his body. It feels oddly intimate and your thighs press together in order to suppress the lustful feeling that takes over your body. Your arm comes around to the back of his head, tugging on the fabric that covers his eyes. “Can I take it off?”

“Sure.”

He lifts his head, allowing you to pull on the knot until it becomes undone. You don’t know what you were expecting, maybe a scar or something, but you’re in awe of the blue orbs that make you feel like you were staring into infinity. They’re bloodshot and half lidded and it’s when one fact you really didn’t want to accept hits you.

Satoru Gojo is one of the prettiest men you’ve ever seen.

And he’s your step brother.

Uneasiness stirs in your lower tummy and you curse at whatever higher power that decided to give you this type of luck, but a hand on your hip trails to your back, pulling your closer and closer until your faces are at a dangerous distance. You can feel your cheeks becoming alarmingly hot and you hate that you can’t blame it on the weed. His hand comes up to your cheeks, his thumb stroking the soft skin. “Thought you wanted me to go away?”

“Changed my mind.” you whisper, eyes slowly closing, lips parting open as you wait for him to lean in and close the gap.

“Hmm? What’s this?” he sneers, causing your eyes to shoot open and your body to jolt up from your bed. The hazy feeling on your head still remains, making it hard to stand completely straight. “Get out.” you sternly demand, leaning back on your desk chair and pointing towards your door.

“Why should I? I don’t think you really want me to leave, babe.” He props his head on his hand, leaning his elbow onto your mattress.

“It’s wrong.”

“What’s wrong? We’re just two people hanging out on a bed. Unless you were trying to do something else, dirty girl.”

“I- I wasn’t! You’re my step brother!”

“Step brother.” He repeats, justifying your actions.

You’re shaking, guilt occupying your mind keeping you distracted. It’s the perfect time for Satoru to get comfortable in the space between your legs, pulling down your loose shorts and taking you by surprise. Before you have a chance to protest, his nose brushes against your sensitive core, making you let out a squeak. “W-We can’t do this!”

“Didn’t you want this?” he questions, looking up at you with wide eyes, “Wanted me to take care of this pretty little pussy, right?”

You know you should be refusing. You know you should be pushing him out your door. But it’s so hard when his pupils are dilated and the grip on the sides of your thighs feels so right. At this point, you’re not thinking, only nodding along to whatever he’s saying, anticipating his next actions.

“So wet.” He mumbles, pulling down the flimsy fabric and throwing it off somewhere in the room. He licks a thick stripe from your entrance to your clit, sucking softly on the pearl while holding you down as the pleasure causes you to jolt upwards. He sucks and slurps like it’s his last meal, making your empty walls pulsate and little whines along with to leave your lips. Looking down, your eyes meet his, the lower half of his face immersed in your cunt.

The wet muscle fucks into you, curling and pressing against your walls, while his thumb rubs against your little clit. He hits all the right spots that make you squirm, pushing your legs wide open to see more of your ruined pussy. The wetness collects on his mouth, his chin, and his cheeks, filling him with a sick sense of satisfaction. “Such a whore, aren’t ya?” he pulls away to comment, but your fingers thread through his hair, pushing his head back where you need him most.

The action is assertive, something he usually hates dealing with. Though this time, he’s filled with a sick sense of pride at the fact that he was able to turn you, someone who seemed to hate him with a burning passion, into a moaning mess with just his mouth. He hums satisfactorily, sending vibrations into your sensitive core that make your thighs shaky.

You’re already cumming in an embarrassingly short time, gushing all over his face while he laps up all the juices you have to offer.

Before you can process anything else, his lips capture yours, lifting your body and dropping you onto your bed. You look at him with half lidded eyes, still sensitive from your last orgasm, while he pulls off his own clothes. His length rests on the inside of your thigh and he’s huge, so huge that it feels heavy against your skin and it scares you. “Satoru, I don’t think I can take you-”

“Shhh, princess,” he reassures you, “You started this. You have to take it.”

He doesn’t give you a chance to speak, taking the fabric of his blindfold and covering your eyes, tying a tight knot on the back of your head. This isn’t right, a voice in your head tells you, but you ignore it because Satoru treats you so well. He keeps you company, gives you some of his weed, eats your pussy without you having to ask him.

The only thing you can see is black and you whine. You so badly want to see Satoru’s pretty face, his chiseled body, his thick cock, but your thoughts are interrupted by the fat tip prodding at your tiny hole. “Too big..” your voice trails off as your mind is lifted, only the feeling of him splitting you in half remaining. You’ve never felt so full and it feels so dirty, yet your slick says otherwise, betraying any rational part that still resides in your body.

“I got you, Princess, don’t worry.” He slurs, drunk on the sensation of your snug walls. The stretch strings, whimpers spilling from your lips, but his cock hits every spot like no other. By the time he’s fully inside of you, it feels like he’s actually in your guts and it’s all intensified by the isolated feeling, not being able to see him at all. Every bite on your shoulder, every kiss on your open mouth, every delicious drag on your gummy walls is amplified.

You’re already cumming around him, a ring of cream forming on his cock as he gazes down at your bare body, wrapping his lips around a sensitive nipple. You squeal, your breath hitching at the same time you clamp down around his throbbing length. “Already? Such a sensitive little princess, aren’t you?” He mutters in your ear, your nails digging into his shoulders, piercing the pale skin. Tears spill from your eyes, flowing down the sides of your face.

His teeth sink into your shoulder and you want to tell him to stop, but the words don’t quite leave your lips. Only babbling noises accompanied by the wet sounds of your cunt and skin slapping against skin. He’s still pounding into your cervix at a relentless pace, in awe of how your slick drips down his balls and onto the white sheets.

Every time he hits that sweet spot, there’s an odd feeling that forms, like you’re about to make a mess. And when your next orgasm washes over you in intense waves of euphoria, a clear liquid spurts from your cunny, coating his lower stomach and your inner thighs. “Who knew my little princess was such a messy girl?” he taunts, making your cheeks flush in embarrassment.

“S-shut up-”

“Don’t worry about it,” he leans in close, his lips dangerously close to your ear, “I’ll clean it all up.”

His smooth voice causes you to squeeze around him, almost like you don’t want him to ever leave your cunt, and it gets harder and harder for him to move. “Fuck, baby you’re so tight, need you to loosen up,” he mumbles, his own orgasm finally approaching, your little cunny milking him for all he’s worth.

He’s rambling little praises, hot pleasure elevated by the high, his hips stuttering and his cock stuffing you to the brim with his warm seed. You both lay there, still intertwined and his body resting on top of yours.

“Ms. (L/N)! Did you have any questions about my lesson today?”

Your face drops in horror, your hand immediately pulling off the blindfold, as you push Satoru away from you and press the leave button on Zoom. A mix of your juices drop onto the floor and he chuckles, pulling you back to bed. “This isn’t over.”

He pins you back onto the mattress, his cock twitching at the sight of your leaking cunt, pulling your thighs until you’re close and pinning them to your chest. In one swift movement, his entire cock is shoved into your cunt, his balls slapping against the flesh of your ass with every thrust, fucking his cum back into your womb.

Gojo Satoru would never be satisfied.

2K notes · View notes

divinefireangel · 4 years ago

Text

They Just Don't Know You

Soft Yandere! Seo Moon-Jo x F! Reader

Disclaimer: This is just a work of fiction. If this piece of fan fiction is offensive to any celebrity, fandom or culture please let me know so I can take it down. Also note that this is my version of a character or celeb, which will vary from person to person.

Author's Note: A 2nd longer fic for our lovely cannibalistic psychopath. I hate that I'm attracted to him. Someone please be my therapist. Or psychiatrist. Honestly doesn't matter. My brain is fucked anyway.

Copyright: Please note that this is my work and if you want to publish this on any other platform, take my permission before doing so. Taking an author's work and posting it somewhere else without any intimation is just disrespectful. I readily welcome suggestions and criticisms. That being said, Happy reading! 🤍

Warnings: 16+ and written for female reader, but all can read. (nothing specified with respect to appearance, etc of reader). Except that I've mentioned reader is short, cuz LDW is tall 🥰. There is a brief mention of sex, but no actual smut. Reader kinda highkey hates on her parents and younger sister. Read it to know. Age gap between reader and Moon-Jo. Slight obsessive thoughts. Manipulative words. I tried to put plot twist in the end, probably you won't notice it 💀. Please please tell me if I need to add more warnings. Do not read if you start to feel uncomfortable. I apologize in advance 🥺

❗❗PLEASE READ WARNINGS ❗❗

Pre-Requisite / Summary: Just a fic based on the song They Just Don't Know You by Little Mix. After watching Strangers from hell I related this song to him for some reason. Reader and Moon-Jo are in an established relationship. And reader's loved ones don't approve.

2.3k ish words My longest fic till date 🥳

" You know that he's too old for you. You can settle for younger, much younger guys for your age sweetheart. If you can't find anyone eligible enough, we will find one for you. And you don't even know if he has intentions of marrying you. What if all he wants is just a fling or some time pass relationship. Hmm? What are you going to do then? "

Sipping her tea silently, Y/N sat next to her dad on the porch swing, listening to all the criticisms he had about Moon-Jo. All his words did was boil her blood. But what could she do when they don't walk in her shoes? They don't know how safe and content she feels when he kisses her like she's the only girl for him in the entire universe. And no point in explaining that to her father anyway. She's tried. And failed. Multiple times.

"Are you done with your tea?" She asks her dad, in desperate attempt to try and get away from him and his words because she knows, and even he knows that it's going to end up in a fight if they continue to speak on the same topic.

Humming yes, he hands her his tea cup which she takes to the kitchen so she can help her mom with dinner. Placing them in the sink upon entering the kitchen, Y/N drags her palms down her face in frustration.

" I could hear what he said you know. Your dad. He's not wrong. Seo Moon-Jo seems like he'll break your heart in three. And we're only looking out for you Y/N. You don't have to go through heartbreak when you can very well avoid it." Her mom finished slowly.

" Why. Why is it so difficult for you to accept the fact that I'm actually in a happy relationship for once in my life. So what if he's much older than I am? He's a dentist. A doctor. A very good profession and he's known and well respected in his neighbourhood too. " Y/N said loud enough for her dad also to hear.

Huffing in annoyance she left the kitchen to go upstairs to her room. Or rather the room she shares with her sister. Of course the door is wide open. The younger rascal is always here for the drama.

Ever since Y/N came out to her family about her relationship with Moon-Jo, her sister has become the favourite child, for obvious reasons. And now eavesdropping with the door wide open? That's a new low. But what else can Y/N expect from such a low life who is literally thriving off her own sister's pain and suffering.

When entering the room, Y/N realizes how big a mistake it was to visit her family. And she did not need such snark from a younger, less experienced child.

"Are you that blinded by " Love " that you don't even see how weird his hair is? A man who isn't an idol or actor doesn't need such long hair. He's clearly a fuckboy. Or man whore. Whichever is right. " She said with disgust.

'She's just jealous. She's just a jealous bitch. They all are.' Y/N thinks to herself.

" At least one of us gets laid regularly. And just so you know, it's absolutely heavenly when he makes me cum over and over on his fingers and his dick-" Y/N said as her tone slowly got lower and darker and her emotion angrier.

Screaming and covering her ears, the younger girl ran downstairs to her mother, no doubt to tattle on her older sister. Rolling her eyes, Y/N started packing her things, all of them, in a bag she took down from the top shelf of the wardrobe.

It's really difficult to leave one's family, but it is clearly getting more and more tiresome to love them nowadays. If it's so wrong to date him, why does Y/N herself not see it? She's a logical and smart young lady. Does her family hate that man so much that they don't even want her to be happy? No matter who she's with. And is it so bad to date a man who's older? Richer? And cares more about her than all of her family members combined?

Wiping the fallen tear stains from her cheek, she just thinks to herself ' They just don't know him. They just don't know him like I do. '

Sending a text to her lover, saying that she misses him and that she's coming back home sooner than planned, Y/N carries her bag through the front door, her parents and sister ignoring her as she leaves and walks out that door one final time.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Once reaching their shared apartment, Y/N collapsed into her lover's arms the moment he opens the door, crying her eyes out. Seeing his lover in turmoil, shedding a tear or two of his own, Moon-Jo carries her to the living room couch to cradle her like a child who needs attention.

" They- They said -"

" Shh my darling. I know. " Moon-Jo said, shushing his girlfriend and giving her a shoulder to cry on. Once she's calmed a little, her sobs turning to sniffs, she lifts her head to meet his gaze.

Seeing her sad, tear stained eyes always upset him. More than anything in the world. Running his long slender fingers across her cheeks and jaw, he removes her hair from her ponytail with his free hand and rests it on her thigh.

" Tell me. Please tell me that you won't break my heart like them. That you won't try to tear my world apart like them. " Y/N looked desperately at him, wanting so badly to know that he's not just using her.

Those words, that slipped out her mouth, shocked Moon-Jo, to say the least. What did he do wrong? What did her family fill her head with?

Tilting his head to a little, he looks into her red eyes, trying to read her mind for a moment, all the while she just looked at him with the same desperate expression.

"Please tell me that you will be there when I need you the most. " Y/N whispered so softly, she herself barely heard it. But the end of the sentence, she started crying all over again.

Taking her head to his neck, he stroked her hair and her sides, trying to calm her down.

" Darling. I promise with my everything, that I will never leave you, I will never ever let you go. That I will do anything, anything necessary to prove my love to you. "

"No, oh dear no. That's not, you don't have- have to do anything at all to make me believe you love me. I'm sorry I asked such a stupid question. " She sobbed out.

Shushing her softly again, he rocks their bodies back and forth, till she's calmed and fallen asleep there, in his arms. Knowing that his arms are her only safe place for her from now on, he takes her delicate figure to the bedroom.

Placing her on her side of the bed, he lays down on his. Staring at her stunning face, he feather touches her face with his fingertips, memorizing every curve, every little detail on her, like a sculptor admiring his work and giving it the finishing touches.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

" So, I did a little digging on your sugar daddy. "

" Why?! And he's not my sugar daddy. " Y/N said in disbelief. No. Not her dear best friend too.

" I know you said not to and I'm sorry. But I am worried about you. He made you leave your family Y/N. " They stated with worry and sympathy.

" No. He didn't make me leave them. I left them by choice. They don't see him like I do. And clearly, they hate that I'm happy with him. " Y/N finished as they sat down at the lunch table.

" Y/N..... "

" What? Even you don't want me to be happy? " She questioned her friend in disbelief. Laughing sarcastically Y/N shook her head.

" I've heard rumours! Okay? He was in the orphanage that had that severe fire explosion. And most of the culprits from that incident are MIA. What if he's one of the people who caused it?! " They said in a whisper, worried that the neighbouring people can hear their conversation.

" Do you really think that? All of that is just a rumour. And he's told me about it. He's told me everything. Unlike my parents who so desperately tried to tie me down to an arranged marriage. "

" He's not good for you. I know you deserve better. Okay he may make happy and all but what if he leaves? What if he just uses you and drops you like you were nothing? We're just trying to make sure you don't get hurt Y/N. Physically and emotionally. " They finished.

" This, all what you said, is cheap talk. But it'll eventually wear down because when we get married and have kids and all that in the future, you're all going to look like fools. And I will proudly say ' I told you so '. "

" If that's the case then I am the happiest person for you. Hopefully I won't have to be the one to say ' I told you so'. "

" Wow. I, just- hah. Wow. Just wow. " She paused.

" You know, I really hoped you would be more supportive or at least tolerant enough to have patience and support me with my decision for my love. " Y/N said loud enough for eavesdroppers to hear audibly.

Of all the people she would have to drop, never even in her nightmares had she fathomed that her best friend would be one.

Getting up from the table, she picks up her bag and leaves without another word, and goes to the only place that has love for her and that accepts her.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Reaching home, Y/N notices the place empty. Maybe he's at the clinic?

Shrugging off her bag and jacket she sits on the couch for a moment, before her restlessness takes over and she begins pacing in the living room.

Why are people being like this? Do they hate her so much? They barely know him. Why are they treating and accusing him to be such a criminal! He's not. He takes care of Y/N so much. He loves her so much. He provides for her. He's affectionate with her, more than he's told he thought capable. He's become her ride or die. And she, his.

They don't know him like I do. They will never love me like he does.

They don't know about the love they have. The just see what they want to see. Bloody society dictating whom to love and whom to not. Is it so hard to see the love they have for each other? Can't they just let it be. They don't know the turmoil she's gone through recently; they don't know how well he's taken care of her, kept her happy and same enough to not let her intrusive thoughts get the best of her.

Her thoughts interrupted by the door clicking open. Smiling, Moon-Jo enters with a box, surely containing sweets from her favourite bakery. How can you not love someone so considerate, who does things for you without even having to ask.

Seeing the sad look upon his lover's face, Moon-Jo's smile fades into a frown.

" What's wrong my dear? "

Smiling sadly Y/N just shakes her head, conveying that she doesn't want to talk about it.

Placing the box of sweets on the coffee table, the two hug each other, feeling of comfort taking over them both. She can just stay here, forever, in his arms till the world ends.

" Babe. What's wrong? You can tell me anything. Anything at all. I'll take care of the problem. " Delicately Moon-Jo cradles Y/N's head in his palms, making her face up to him, their height difference evident.

Sighing, she moves to sit on the couch, motioning him to do the same. " It's just people. And what they say. My family was one thing, but my best friend, the person I chose as my family " Pausing Y/N breathers the tears back in, " They were doubtful of you today. How can I live knowing that no one will approve of us? " Y/N questioned looking at him.

" Does their opinion really matter that much? So much so that you are skeptical of my affection to you? " Coldly, he moved back from his seat on the couch.

" No! No. Gosh that is not what I mean. Not at all. I love you and I know that you love me. So much. So much so I would die for you. But there are other people whom I care about. Who's opinions matter to me. And I don't want to let them go. As happy as I am with you, I need them too. They give me joy in a different way, that is important. "

" Do I not make you happy? Are you not content with the love I give you? Is it not enough? " He asks carefully.

" That's not what I meant! You love me more than anyone I've known. "

"Then what's the problem? You don't need those people who don't love you. You have me. You will have me forever and ever. I will never leave you. And you will never leave me either. We'll be with each other till the end of the world darling. "

Nodding with a small smile you looked down at your feet.

Unhappy with your action, Moon-Jo pulls your face up by your chin to look at him with such force, it scared you a little, making your heart skip a beat in fear.

" Do you not love me, babe? " He asked tilting his head to a side, his expression mildly offended.

" I do! I love you. So much. " You finished with a soft tone, cupping his face with your hands.

Grinning like a Cheshire Cat, Moon-Jo leaned down to capture your lips with his. Reacting immediately, you kissed him with as much energy and sincerity you could muster, as you head filled with thoughts of doubt.

Had your parents been right? Had for friend been right? Had they all been right all along and you too blind to see?

No. It can't be. He loves you. He's said that so many times. And you love him.

You love him.

You.

Love.

Him.

...

Do you love him, or have you been illusioned into loving him?

#lee dong wook #lee dong wook imagine #lee dong wook x reader #ldw #strangers from hell #strangers from hell x reader #hell is other people #seo moon jo #seo moon jo x reader #seo moon jo imagine #seo moon jo x f!reader #yandere seo moon jo

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spencestyles · 4 years ago

Text

I’d do anything

summary: spencer is in love with y/n and y/n is in an abusice relationship. will spencer be able to save y/n? love her when she needs him most?

pairing: spencer reid x bau!fem!reader

warnings: ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP DO NOT READ IF NOT COMFORTABLE READING THIS CONTENT, normal case violence

words: 4k+

please do not read if you are uncomfortable with the content of it abuse is a trigger. be mindful of this.

enjoy!!

SPENCER'S POV

"Guys this is my boyfriend, Owen," y/n said to the team on a night out.

For the longest time she and I have been best friends, nothing more. I have been in love with her for a while now, but I have always been too afraid to tell her. Now that she had a boyfriend, I knew I had lost my chances.

"Oh my gosh!" Penelope yelled. "It is so nice to finally meet you! y/n has told us so much about you!"

Owen smiled and gave y/n a side hug, "Hopefully all good things."

"Yes," JJ quickly said. "She makes you seem amazing. Hopefully you can live up to the expectations."

"Hopefully I do not disappoint," Owen replied.

The night continued with the team asking Owen questions. I had met Owen before and he truly was a nice guy. That was the worst part. However as the night continued, y/n acted strange and almost seemed afraid of Owen. She was acting timid, something she has never done, not even in front of an unsub.

Owen went to get y/n a drink so I decided it would be the perfect time to ask y/n, "Are you okay? You've been acting strange, is Owen hurting you?"

"What?" y/n laughed. "Spencer are you okay? Of course not. Owen and I are perfectly fine."

I sighed, "Okay, just checking. Are we still on for Dr Who tomorrow night?"

"When have I ever not showed up for Dr Who?" y/n retorted. "I will obviously come. Nothing can ever come between us and Dr Who."

Owen suddenly came up behind y/n, "Wait, you're hanging with Spencer tomorrow?" Owen asked aggressively. "I thought we were going to do something?"

y/n laughed, "I told you I can't ever hang on certain Fridays because I watch Dr Who with Spencer. I also never agreed to doing something together, I would have never forgotten a Dr Who watch party."

Owen glared at me. Obviously he was angry I was hanging out with y/n.

"I think it's time for us to leave," Owen said, grabbing y/n's arm very hard. "Say goodbye to your friends." Owen walked over to the table with y/n and put on a fake smile. As they walked out the door, I noticed y/n look back at me, tears in her eyes. Something was wrong.

The whole team was sitting at the table talking about something random when I decided to speak up, "How did you guys like Owen?"

A mix of complements were thrown by the girls, but the guys, they didn't seem too impressed. JJ, Emily, and Penelope, all went to get drinks while Rossi, Hotch, Derek, and I stayed at the table.

"What did you guys think of him?" I asked.

"I hated him," Derek said simply. "I saw the way y/n acted around him, much profilers the girls are. She's acting just like someone who has been manipulated and abused."

Hotch nodded, "I agree with Derek. I know we aren't supposed to profile team members, but the girls obviously don't see anything wrong."

"Are you guys sure?" Rossi asked. "I mean he seems very nice and maybe you all just think he is not good because you all wish y/n and Spencer were together."

The guys looked at me as I began to blush profusely, "I don't want to be with y/n that much anymore." They looked at me in disagreement. "Guys I'm serious, she has a boyfriend."

"Yeah and you don't like her," Rossi argued. "Just admit that you still have a crush on her and then if something really happens I will believe you."

"Fine," I sighed. "I still like y/n."

YOUR POV

"What the hell y/n," Owen screamed at you. "What the fuck is Dr Who night? You know I don't like him."

You choked a sob, "Owen it isn't like that. I don't like him, he's my best friend. Please don't hurt me."

"He obviously has something for you and you have something for him," He yelled.

"I d-don't lik-ke him Owen," I whispered. "I promise."

This had become your normal routine. Spencer or some other male would say something and Owen would go crazy. Especially about Spencer. Owen would yell at you and sometimes things would escalate. That unfortunately is how it went tonight.

It started with a push, then a slap. Sometimes it progressed more, but that was rare.

"We are going somewhere," Owen said.

You were being dragged out of the house, "Owen, what?"

"Well since you can't be obedient, I'm going to have to teach you somehow y/n."

And like that you were knocked out unconscious.

SPENCER'S POV

I walked into work carrying a coffee for both y/n and I. I decided to get her a coffee to apologize for last night's irrational decisions. I had come to the conclusion that Owen wasn't actually abusive, I was just jealous.

Derek and Hotch though, not so much.

"Baby girl, that guy is a grade A asshole," Derek said to Garcia. "Can you please just do one background check?"

Penelope sighed, "I can't do that Derek, I promised y/n I wouldn't look into him."

I decided to ignore the conversation and wait for y/n to come in for work. After about thirty minutes of waiting I decided to ask Hotch.

"Hey, is y/n coming in today?" I asked.

"Um, no," he said, pulling out his phone. "I got this strange text though, can you look through it."

"Yeah let me see," I said, walking over to where he set his phone down.

"Agent Hotchner, I will not be able to come into work tomorrow for the case. I have an issue with my tonsils. I am sorry." I recited. "I don't think y/n typed this, maybe we should send someone to her house and to Owen's house."

Hotch groaned, "I'll send Derek and JJ, I am hoping our next case doesn't become y/n. Please continue to look over the text and I'll have Garcia look into Owen."

I nodded and put the text onto the white board so I would be able to write on it.

"Hotch, look at this," I said, Hotch walking over to me. "First, y/n hasn't called you agent Hotchner since her first day here, she usually calls you Hotch or Aaron. Also, y/n got her tonsils removed when she was 7."

"Garcia, have you looked into Owen at all," Hotch asked.

"Yeah a little, but it's all normal," Garcia answered.

Hotch glared at her, "Not enough, do a full deep dive. I don't care what y/n told you not to do, he is hiding something and so is she."

Garcia nodded and went straight to work as Hotch's phone began to ring.

"Morgan, you're on speaker."

"Okay so y/n's apartment was spotless," Morgan said. "But it was also locked, so I don't think she went home to her apartment last night."

JJ began to add on, "Owen's apartment on the other hand, was a mess. Like it looked like there was a robbery of some form. Also, y/n's purse was there."

"Garcia what do you have on Owen?" Hotch asked.

"Owen Winters, he is 42 and from Southern California," Garcia began. "As a child CPS was contacted many times and it looks like his dad killed himself when he was 8. It looks like he has an extensive amount of charges for abuse and harassment, all from his ex-girlfriends."

"Do any of them live near?" I asked.

"Yes, boy wonder, 25 year-old Vanessa Montgomery works in a coffee shop near the white house," Penelope explained.

"What is the coffee shop?" I questioned.

"The Starbucks over on Pennsylvania Ave. near the White House," she answered. "Why?"

"I know her, she is the barista that always gets our order perfect," I replied.

"Morgan and JJ pick her up on your way back," Hotch ordered. "Owen Winters is our new unsub and y/n y/l/n is our newest victim."

I sighed as I began to prepare the questions for Vanessa. I looked over at y/n's desk and decided to start looking through it for any details.

As I walked over to the desk, I looked at the coffee on y/n's desk. I wanted to apologize for something that I was right about. Why didn't she tell me? was the only thing going through my head.

At her desk I noticed some things that I guess I hadn't seen before. On her desk she has four framed pictures. One of her, Hotch and Rossi. Another that was her and the girls. One that was of her, Derek and me, from one of the first cases we had together . The last one however, was the one I had never seen. It was a picture of y/n and me from when she took me to Colorado to ski and hike.

I smiled at the memory,

"Spencer, be careful," y/n yelled as I walked closer and closer to the edge of the cliff.

I laughed, "y/n I'll be fine! Come here, let's take a picture."

"Fine! Spencer I swear if I fall, you are coming down with me."

"For you, y/n, I'd do anything."

I then began to look deeper in her desk. I felt like I was violating y/n's personal space, but this needed to be done. As I looked through her drawers, I wasn't able to find anything that could help. Until I looked in the last drawer.

In this drawer, I found papers for a restraining order that had been filed and denied. y/n was trying to get away from Owen.

"Guys, I found something," I said yelling into the conference room. The team looked at me to continue, "y/n filed a restraining order on Owen but it was denied. The date was two months ago. I was thinking back and y/n has been acting a little strange for the past five months. Owen has to have her."

"Reid, we already established Owen has her, but this ensures that he was abusive," Hotch said.

Emily sighed, "The timeline makes sense. She has been hanging out with us less and she has worn more turtlenecks in the past five months than I have seen anyone ever wear."

"Yeah," Penelope said. "y/n has ditched us for girls night for the past few months. She also got mad at me at team dinner last night when I asked why she wasn't wearing something more revealing."

"Her smiles have been fake," I added. "She smiles at us all the time to brighten our days, but they haven't been as nice, welcoming."

"Well, Reid, it looks like you were correct," Rossi said.

"What do you mean?" JJ asked.

Derek laughed, "Last night when you three went off to get drinks, Reid told us he thought Owen was acting violent with y/n and thought she was acting strange. Hotch and I immediately agreed, but Rossi didn't seem convinced. Rossi thought Reid was just jealous because he has a crush on y/n and he doesn't realize she likes him."

"Derek, not the time," I said sternly.

Emily laughed, "I can't believe you of all people couldn't see it Spencer. y/n is hopelessly in love with you and now she is dating a scumbag because she doesn't think you like her."

I sighed as I began to look over where y/n could be located, thinking about the idea of dating y/n wouldn't help us find her. We had made little progression on this, but we knew it had to be somewhere with significance to either one of them or both of them.

I decided to ask Garcia, "Garcia, have you made any progress on where y/n could be?"

"Yes 187, it looks like Owen owns a small cabin around half an hour from here," Garcia said.

"Okay let's go now," Hotch told us.

Garcia gasped, "Wait there is a live feed. I'm putting it up on the screen."

The video was horrific. y/n was tied to a chair looking almost dead. She had blood falling from above her head and looked like she had been through hell.

"Hello BAU," Owen said to the camera. "I have your dear y/n, but you wont be able to get her. y/n will never be out of my sight ever again. I will not have Dr. Spencer Reid ruin our relationship."

"It's not your fault Spence," y/n said to the camera. My heart clenched. She was in pain and I couldn't be there to help her.

"He is the one in the way of our relationship y/n," Owen yelled. "Of course it is his fault."

"Spencer isn't the issue with our relationship Owen," y/n yelled back. "You are."

Hotch started to grab his things, "She shouldn't have said that, we need to leave now. She is already in danger."

We all ran to the SUVs. I went in a car with Derek and Hotch. Derek drove and broke every traffic law imaginable, making the thirty minute car ride less than twenty. The three of us grabbed out vests and began to run to the cabin.

Suddenly, Hotch stopped me, "Spencer it isn't safe for you to be there."

"Hotch I have to go," I protested.

"Spencer, you are the reason she is there," Hotch said. "It may be Owen's fucked up mind, but you are the trigger that made him angry. y/n loves you more than him and he noticed and now we're here. Stay outside." I decided to not fight and stay outside to wait for the other team members. The other SUV pulled up quickly after us.

"Jesus Christ, that was the fastest I've ever driven," Emily complained. "Spencer what are you doing out here?"

"Morgan and Hotch already moved in, Hotch doesn't want me inside," I explained.

"I'll stay out here with you Kid," Rossi said. I nodded in thanks as I watched Emily and JJ run to the cabin. I stood staring at the cabin. Time had become slow motion. It felt like an eternity watching the movement inside.

I heard Derek yell from the cabin, "MEDIC! WE NEED A MEDIC!" I immediately ran into the cabin. I looked over and saw y/n in Derek's arms, barely breathing. I heard Owen yelling at me, but couldn't focus on anything besides y/n.

"y/n," I said, moving to where I was holding her head. "y/n, I need you to listen to me. I love you, I always have and I am so sorry I never told you."

"Sir, we need you to move," the medic said, trying to move y/n onto the stretcher. I began to move when I felt someone grab my hand. I looked down and noticed it was y/n. She gave my hand three squeezes. I Love You.

With y/n on her way to the hospital and Owen getting taken back to Quantico, Derek, JJ, and I all went to the hospital to keep tabs on y/n while the others closed the case.

I sat in my chair nervous out of my mind. Derek sat next to me trying to calm me down and JJ was across from me.

"Spencer, you need to calm down," Derek told me.

"I can't calm down Derek, y/n could die," I said frantically.

JJ began to laugh, "Did you know the other day y/n told Emily, Penelope, and I, that she wanted kids? Can you imagine that? y/n with kids?"

A tear trickled down my face, "She always told me she wanted two kids, one boy and one girl. y/n would be a great mother."

Derek laughed, "The thing that would make y/n such a great mother if her kids were also yours Pretty Boy. I have known since the beginning you two would have pretty kids." I laughed, but also glared at him.

"y/n y/l/n?" The doctor called. The three of us stood up and the doctor began to walk towards us, "y/n is out of surgery. It was touch and go for a while, but she is stable. There were many noticeable signs of abuse that were old, she has a broken harm and three broken fingers, all of which are old."

I let out a shaky breath, "When can I- we see her?"

"I can only let one person in at a time and I doubt she is awake," the doctor explained. JJ and Derek looked at me, signaling me to go to y/n's room. I followed the doctor to her room.

"It might be a little much to see, she may not look like herself. She is very, very fragile and has wires attached to her," the doctor said before opening the door for me. Walking into the room, the environment was tense. y/n was laying in the hospital bed with wires attached to her and much of her body was wrapped up from the surgery and from her injuries.

I went over and sat next to her bed, grabbing onto her hand, "y/n, you can't hear me but I am here. It's Spencer. I am so glad you are okay, but why didn't you tell me about Owen? I could have done something. WE could have done something. I am just so glad you are safe."

For the rest of the time, I sat there watching her sleep. Not in a creepy way, but to make sure she was safe. I was so pissed at myself for not realizing what Owen was doing earlier. I should have been able to see the warning signs. Some of them were subtle, when she wouldn't hang out with the team or was constantly checking her phone. But some of them should have been immediate red flags, the flinching in front of the unsub or how she always wore clothes to cover herself. I should have known. The team should have known.

I felt y/n's hand move and saw her shift, "Spencer?" she asked.

"y/n," I said breathlessly. "I am right here, but I need to go get a nurse. You are at the hospital, Owen hurt you."

I started standing up to leave, "Spence, no. Don't leave me."

I sighed, looking at her disheveled features, "y/n, I will be right back. You need to see a nurse."

Walking out of the room was painful, hearing her sobs in fear of being hurt again. It pained me to know I was leaving her when she needed me, again.

I walked over to her nurse, "Um y/n y/l/n has woken up, I thought you should know." The nurse said her thanks and walked with me to y/n's room. As we walked in, the sound of y/n's labored breaths became more noticeable.

"Miss y/l/n, we need you to calm down," the nurse said, running to y/n's bedside.

Immediately, I walked over to y/n and held her hand. "Sir, you need to exit the room," the nurse said, ushering me away from y/n. At that moment I didn't know what was worse, hearing y/n's cries or feeling so helpless in the situation.

Suddenly, I felt a presence next to me, "Reid, you need to leave, it's not good for you here."

Derek.

"Derek, I-I-I can't just leave," I stuttered. "I need to be there to help, she's all alone."

"Kid, you need to shower," Derek said.

"No, Derek you don't understand," I said angrily. "I can't just leave her here again. I didn't notice when she was hurt and I need to show that I care."

Derek sighed, "Reid, she knows. She's not going to hate you. No one knew that she was going through that. It's not your fault."

I was about to say something when I say y/n being moved out of her room by doctors, "What is going on?" I asked.

"Miss y/l/n is getting taken back into surgery," the doctor said. "We don't know what happened." I began to hyperventilate. I was freaking out. y/n wasn't alright. She was going to die.

As I began to sob, Derek pulled me into a hug, "She is going to be alright man. You'll get to see her again and talk to her and finally ask her on a date. Does that sound good?"

I unconvincingly nodded my head.

"No, Spencer, don't do that," he said. "Don't doubt the doctors and think about the statistics, y/n is not a statistic."

I nodded, wiping my eyes.

"There you go," Derek smirked. "Now, go take a shower at your house so y/n wont shy away at your scent. Also, maybe get her some flowers. She likes-"

"Pink roses," I interrupted, laughing. "Pink roses are the most difficult flowers to find."

Derek laughed, "At least try to find them."

"For her," I began. "I'd do anything."

After that, I ran to the SUV to head to Quantico and get my car. The car ride felt like forever and I wasn't excited for the possibility of seeing Owen. Thankfully, I didn't see Owen between the time of dropping off the SUV and going to the parking lot to get my car. The car ride to my apartment was short, thank God. I decided to take a quick shower, just wanting to freshen up. I got dressed in my home clothes, which were in fact different from my work clothes, contrary to the belief of most of my team members.

I made it to the flower shop that was down the street from my apartment. I was usually able to find at least one pink rose here, but it was typically very difficult.

"Hello," the shop owner said. "We are close to closing Spencer. Do you need anything in specific?"

"Pink roses," I stated.

The owner laughed, "I'll have to check the back, but don't get your hopes up."

I knew I shouldn't have gotten my hopes up, but I couldn't help myself. y/n loves pink roses and I love y/n.

The owner came back, "You my kind sir, are in good luck. We had one bouquet left of pink roses in the back."

"Thank you, thank you, thank you," I said, pulling out my money. The owner nodded as I ran out the door to my car.

Speeding to the hospital, I made it to the waiting room. In the waiting room, I couldn't find the team. They were all there, but they weren't in the waiting room. I decided to go to y/n's room and see if they were near there.

Walking to y/n's room, I heard laughter. I looked into the room and saw the team in there along with y/n, smiling. I knocked on the door and slowly opened it.

"Spence," y/n smiled. "I missed you."

"Well I should get going," JJ began. "I need to go see my boys."

The rest of the team followed with their excuses for leaving y/n and I alone.

"H-hi y/n," I stuttered. "I brought you flowers, h-how are you?"

"I am as good as I can be," y/n laughed, obviously compensating the pain. "Thank you for the flowers Spence, I can't believe you could find them at this hour. You have always told me-"

"10 AM is the best time to buy pink roses," I interrupted. "Sorry."

"It's okay Spence, how are you?" She asked.

"Not that great," I said honestly. "Why didn't you tell us y/n?"

y/n sighed, "It was hard Spencer. I already barely had time alone with you guys and I didn't want to ruin it. Owen was also very scary- a mad man. I felt hopeless Spence, I didn't know what to do. I mean I've seen situations like this all the time in cases, but when it was actually happening I felt like there was nothing to do."

I held on to y/n's hand, giving it small kisses while she continued to talk me through her feelings, "and Spencer, I don't want to be alone tonight. Do you think you could stay?"

"Of course y/n," I answered.

"Thanks Spence, you're the best," she said. We continued to sit in a comfortable silence, watching the new episode of Dr Who on the small television in the corner of the room when y/n spoke up again, "Did you mean it?"

"Did I mean what?" I asked, hoping she didn't mean my love confession.

y/n looked at me, knowing I was avoiding the topic, "When you said you love me Spencer. Did you mean it?"

"Yes," I answered.

"I love you too," She said.

I smiled, "Maybe once you're better Icantakeyoutodinner?"

"Spencer say it slower and I'll answer," y/n laughed. "I couldn't understand you."

"Once you're better maybe I can take you out to dinner?" I asked.

"Of course," y/n said. "But no Indian, if we are going on a date I want to go out somewhere. I want to feel pretty."

"To me, you are the most beautiful girl in the world," I said.

y/n blushed profusely, "I still can't believe you found those pink roses! I bet you had to look all over."

"I did, but for you, I'd do anything."

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