#IDK IF THIS MAKE SENSE I LIKE TALKING ABT THEM TOO MUCH
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ppgear dealing with realizing theyre in love is so funny
niko: fell first. hyperventilating, can't believe he's in love with someone like him, get flustered easily when wanderer is brought up, heavy in denial but still seek out his company anyway, way too many things remind him of wanderer and get stupidly happy if anyone said "he mentioned you earlier-". genuinely acts like a highschool boy in love.
wanderer: fell harder. thinks he's hiding it well, he is not. usually remains rather unbothered and unaffected but then he's staring at niko yapping for 10 minutes straight with such endearment in his gaze, actively tried to push the feelings away and ignore it, ended up being as (if not even more) emotional than niko (but every outbursts are silence)
#wanna do comparison to see how different they both are#often time i do get a lil insecure if niko might be too similar to wanderer-- but while i think niko's just as verbally straightforward#as wanderer niko is more openly emotional in a lot of aspects while wanderer is more reserved when it comes to his emotions#so wanderer falling harder makes sense considering he's more guarded of who he allowed to be in his life--#while niko is more desperated to have connection but is still somewhat guarded enough to only allowed few in#IDK IF THIS MAKE SENSE I LIKE TALKING ABT THEM TOO MUCH#tag: puppetgear#.txt
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i recently started another hades 2 playthrough and idk if im just delusional but im just becoming more and more convinced that youll be able to meet ~certain~ gods once youre getting closer to a ~certain~ place
#tried making that post as spoiler free as possible#but im not gonna be spoiler free in these tags so dont look if you dont want any spoilers whatsoever#ISTFG WE BETTER MEET ARES AND/OR ATHENA ON THE WAY TO OLYMPUS#THEY ARE GODS OF WAR WHO ARE MENTIONED OFTEN AS BEING BUSY W THE WAR AGAINST CHRONOS' FORCES#MEETING THEM ON THE WAY UP TO OLYMPUS MAYBE SORTA HOW IT IS WHEN YOU MEET ARTEMIS OR ICARUS OR NEMESIS WOULD MAKE SO MUCH SENSE#AND I JUST FEEL LIKE SOME LINES ARE KINDA TEASING AT IT ALREADY#LIKE SOME THINGS ERIS SAYS ABT ARES OR WHEN THE OTHER GODS ARE TALKING ABT ATHENA AND ARES#id also love to meet dionysus but. hes apparently getting very drunk all the time so i doubt hed be like defending olympus rn lol#but back to ares and athena. it's just so. this is a war and they are gods of war. we Gotta meet them (pls pls pls pls pls pls pls)#gonna have to check how much space is left in that keepsake place...... bc idk.#theres the fates who we're presumably gonna meet/save too and we're probably gonna get a keepsake from them#maybe hypnos is gonna wake up at some point so thats a hypnos keepsake#and then ares and athena keepsakes also pls#but we also dont have a keepsake from hades rn so hmmmmm#idk i just hope we/melinoë can actually meet hypnos and athena and ares and build friendship w her dad and the fates#hades 2#hades 2 spoilers
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screaming to the crowd. zero escapers i need to know your thoughts/hcs on 1904!phi and her partner.... im thinking a lot about phis insane ass backstory. need to Know.....
#personal supporter of old woman yuri. thats what they are to me#to me they are like. very much not a normal family by the time they take in phi and foster her the Other phi would be 104......#assuming she is also just kind of weird with age like delta is i guess LMAO. but yeah#phis autistic tgirl swag carries over to 1904 phi too . to me#though there is also something to be said about how they specifically Fostered her like she said and didnt . adopt her. delta was adopted#she was not#unless 1904 phi was but like. fostering and adoption arent the same thing! far from it#like it kind of implies they didn't intend to keep 2008 phi around permanently? if that makes sense#plus the way phi talks about her foster parents (barely at all and she says that she doesn’t have a mother or a father)#makes it sound like she doesn't really consider them true parents. and how she talks abt the brooch and everything in vlr makes it seem lik#the mystery of what happened to her birth parents was probably on her mind a lot considering that brooch was the reason she studied latin a#all. she says she kept its message close to her like a prayer. its interesting. is there some kind of strain between her and her foster#parents? are they just busy a lot with their research work?#is it a matter of the idea of being wanted? wanting closure on what happened to her birth parents?#idk! lots on the mind i think its conceptually rly interesting bc of All That combined with the fact that she essentially raised herself#i like pondering how she ticks. yknow#zero escape#ztd spoilers#phi vlr#zero escape phi#zero time dilemma#ztd#trevor.txt#phiposting
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oh hey the video is public now so i can post on tumblr about this without sounding insane! anyway everyone should go watch me and a few other speedrunners hunt fire for sport (randomizer edition)
#blossom.txt#hollow knight#blossom plays hollow knight#i have ~4 years of rando racing experience so i know how to analyze a rando seed to death#and be Very Normal about it#this was my first time doing hk pvp so i was not doing much of the hunting part lmao#i was more doing like tracking and strategizing and telling people where he probably was so they could kill :3#it was a really interesting one you should give it a watch!!!#(also if anyone has stuff they want to send asks abt i will absolutely jump on that chance to infodump :3)#(please let me infodump i'm very autism yippee yipee)#oh also having watched it back pye edited it to have proportionately more of my voice than is in the actual vod lmao#because i was mostly standing around talking abt what was in the seed bc i memorized the entire fucking 10 page doc i wrote#a normal thing to do on a thursday night#idk how i feel abt that because i hate my voice lmao but like hopefully kids in the comments aren't too mean T-T#i feel like with the amount of complexity a rando seed has focusing on the person who was telling everyone where the stuff is makes sense#so it's not necessarily a bad thing i just hate my voice ew ew ew#slightly disappointed that most of the discussion abt abyss got cut out#so there's just a few times we mention king's brand seemingly for no reason#but it was a Whole Thing where we were like 'why did he get shade cloak'???#because you wouldn't waste time going the long way all the way around peak for no reason right#there were several grubs in abyss and brand was on the way so i was trying to figure out when he would go to abyss#and he just...never did. why fire#threw off my whole plan by playing it like a svh game and not a spoiler rando race. smh#i wasted a bit of time just hanging around basin and he literally never set foot in there lmao#and then also guarding paum relic in fungal because it had hidden stag and if he went to get it i wanted to know about it#instead he just three cycled right fungal and did mantis lords....#cryign#also the amount of times shelby got jumpscared and attacked me thinking i was fire...oops#some of them didn't even make the cut it was so bad ahfdlkjhglkjdf
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literally Cannot stop thinking about how all the musicians i love for their rlly raw political music that hits just right and yet now (and tbh realizing always) theyre silent on everything going on rn? like i thought they actually stood for something bc their music does Not tip toe around shit but here we are??? and nothing??? maybe im not paying attention but like. dude.
and they cant even make the “oh but itll ruin my career” because they built themselves on saying theyd say what they believed in whether or not it fucked with their popularity or their ability to make money. like these artists made me give hope in artists creating art for art’s sake, but also to spread really important messages. and yet
#literally makes zero fuckin sense#mainly i am talking abt ren and grandson here#and pls tell me if theyve actually vocally supported a permanent ceasefire#but i dont think either of them have#and like yungblud too but his music tbh is not as hard hitting as grandson or ren#but yungblud Especially has built himself on being a space for outcasts and just like bringing humanity back#which is something that i love abt him so much. his fanbase is so so tight knit#idk why it just feels different with him#but then hes not saying anything and i second guess all of that#ugh!! like theyre all white guys too so im just#like i think i knew in the back of my head#but i rlly rlly hoped#rambles
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do u ever think abt how 3houses/hopes position dimitri’s relationships w his friends in relation to his relationship w the goddess & feel rlly rlly normal or is that just me
#head in hands……….#few3h#it’s about the thing he says to byleth ‘we lack the means to reach out and grasp it’ and then everybody continuously reaching out to him#again and again over and over forever#ESPECIALLY in the king awakens cutscene. felix & dedue reaching out & dedue being the one to physically take dimitri’s hand#it’s like yeah faerghus worships an absent goddess and you’re SUPPOSED to believe in her and trust her and be good for her etc#and dimitri just can’t do it until it’s for his friends#and the scene in the rain after gronder in houses too obv#obviously it’s more blatant too considering the byleth sothis situation but ykwim it’s not sothis doing the reaching out there#like#we can talk abt glory and honour etc all we want but is that a truer motivator than the ppl u love???#for dimitri it isn’t bc he disagrees w all that honour anyway esp after duscur where he saw it fall apart w Glenn’s death (ingie support)#honour and glory are what get his friends killled for him but if he resolves to make the world a better place FOR them#that’s much easier to stomach#(and. the church being intertwined w the knighthood honour thing etc.) lol#idk if this makes sense im having SO MANY issues rendering a film in maya rn lol im slamming my head thru the wall#feposting#fe3h#deertalking#im being very brave not derailing my initial point to just talk abt dmlx here i hope u know that#i love him so much. mimi relationship w faith b like ‘true personal connection is inherently as impossible as seeing the goddess herself’#(teacher proceeds to become the goddess 2 prove him wrong)#im gonna come back and talk abt this before bc its my fav dimitri topic my brain just isn’t working rn o7
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Ok so they put the conciousnesses of 4 successful people into androids. Not sure why yet. And not sure what cobalt's thing was (neon artist, chrom researcher and published author, kei entertainer, but cobalt i cant really guess based on personality alone...) but i guess it'll all make sense next episode
#i still liked chrom's episode the most#im not sure if im just too much of a cynic but im not sure if i can believe the power of art was enough to stop prejudice#im not sure how they passed stage 4 after being like. cancelled on twitter for being andoids#even if the guy deleted the original tweet. idk. i expected them to have to give a response besides the mural#idk i will probably rewatch the episode again tonight#maybe im being too dramatic maybe the power of art can reach people and change their perception and prejudice#especially since the babel voters seem to be just regular people. i could see knocc being the 'exception' to their dislike of androids#dont look at my tags too much im just trying to make sense of how i feel about this episode but dont have whom to talk to abt technoroid
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...
#today has been a day. as in time did pass. the earth rotated. and i accomplished very little#bc im just feeling paralyzed and not so good. and i guess thats understandable#like i understand y its happening but its not any less frustrating. mostly its just knowing that i have to make life altering decisions in#the next few weeks. and the pressure of: if i dont decide to go for this one project then they dont get a student and they dont get funding#that makes me pretty nauseous. and knowing i have an interview Thursday that im not ready for and i dont really wanna do#and its a product of not talking to people like a human being. like i just dont interact with people much. when im in the lab i mostly#stand around looking unapproachable or go in when i kno there's no one there and i just dont have close friends so i dont really talk to or#text anyone. i just work and fail to get things done. so then when im in a situation where i have to talk to ppl its all anxious shrapnel#or me dominating the conversation bc i cant stand the pauses and i have so much obsessivly rotatinf in my head. and i hate it. im so sick#of hearinf my own voice but no one talk in the way i want them to. i get so bored. and i want to ask pressing and uncomfortable things but#i kno i shouldnt. but i also dont really have a filter so ill just say fucking whatever. which is what i did Saturday when a triggering#topic of conversation arose. so now my lab mate officially knows too much. but whatever wtf is he gonna do abt it. i just get so annoyed#bc now its in my head. thr fact it set me off and that i overshared and that now its in my head. annoying.#and it doesn't help with the writing things i need to finish. bc i dont like feeling like ive done something wrong and one of the reviewers#has good points. which also probably means ill have to redo my 8 days of measurements so far#but i also might b able to shorten the timeline so idk. just a lot is happening rn and i feel the pressure and by brain doesn't like#pressure. and not doing things rn is not good. things need to be done#so idk i dont feel good but it makes sense. by the end of February hopefully things will b figured out#and i should sleep and hope for a better tomorrow#unrelated
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i'm so happy i'll cry so bad when i finally open it 😭😭
#tag later#AAAA IM ACTUALLY SO HAPPY#IM LIKE. RLLY CHILL RN BUT IM SO SO HAPPY#i'll play nier first ofc but oh my god zack. crisis core. i'll cry so bad#im so happy im rlly so happy it's so funny i'm so chill rn but#earlier when i saw data blitz w the poster i jumped n ran to it pointing at it n#I WAS SMILING SM WHEN THEY HAD IT IN STOCK N ALL UWAHH#fun day w my friend hehe we rlly just shopped ngl 🥹#her. 'friend' ehem (read; basically bf) was low on social bat it seems but it was cool meeting them irl BUT I WAS TOO SHY TO TALK..#they're usually more extroverted tho n then#i'm sorry i accidentally peeked at my friend's messages n her friend mentioned that like. if another friend of ours (who apollo n i are#closer with) then it wld've been more chill or wtvr I CANT REMEMBER#i miss hanging out w my friends :< I MISS THEM SO MUCH FUCK#I'm so tired from walking tho help i'm sitting down rn finally#torn between really excited for ccr n stressed for the future n really happy from today n#torn too between feeling excited or. idk lonely rn thinking abt all my different kinds of relationships#that flew by too fast.. i wna spend more time w my friends :<#despite how fun it was n everything i can't shake off this certain. emptiness that i can't make sense of#BUT RN I'M DOING FINE DW#technically i'm friends too w the friend of my longtime friend bcs we met (save for me w my longtime friend ofc#like way back early this year. turns out another guy from the other school went bowling w their friends in the same mall#n OH YEAH in this same mall iirc the friend apollo n i are closer w from the guys went to a con here yesterday?#i just realized hi small weird thumb reveal it seems#i just realized if you're filo n know your malls n know a con yesterday then it's very obvious where i was today uh#WAH THAT SAID THOUGH omg i'm rambling but i'm. god i've been feeling rather empty lots lately But i know that i'm happy from today#omg oh yh bcs of all the ppl i mentioned earlier me n longtime friend n apollo joked abt like. reunion of that grp earlier this year hehe#the idea is rlly lovely.. ngl i rlly do have a level of social anxiety even w close friends yeah but that doesn't mean i'm antisocial no#i rlly want to socialize n make friends :< so the idea of it is. rlly wonderful indeed but it seems so far out of my reach#i'll fix tags later i have sm to talk abt oh my god but it's comforting knowing my friend. felt the same way i do abt that earlier hehe#I RLLY WANT A BUCKET HAT N COOL SHADES TO GO W IT HFKSJFKSJFS
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ok sry last one. sry
#its like i know im unwell but when i go to talk to ppl abt it i just cant#it never phrases right i never actually am able to articulate how I feel because i dont really know i guess. and it feels like the words i#use r judt sort of. borrowed? i dont say things how i feel bc i dont know how i feel i say like. i say things how i think a person would say#them. and sometimes its nott acurate but i dont have anything in my toolbox thats closer#does that make sense. snd i also like. ontop of base communication issue#i dont like being honest. thats not rly it. i want to be homest bc i want help#but when i talk to a therapist im bad at telling the full like. how do explain#im bad at being like..how i actually am bc i edit mysel#and sometimes i edit tooheabily an i leave out entire bits of like. tje context i guess#which is bad im supposed to give full context but it makes me feel ill to not tell ppl what they want to hear#and obviously a therapist doesnt Want to hear anything theyre judtdoing their job#but i cant r fullt honest snd the idsue is ill focus too much on one aspect eith the therapist#snd then they think thats the only thing and then i bring in a nother thing and they like. ots too much theres not enough time to talk abt#everything bc i ramble#i dont know. i eish i knew how to properly seek help#i need to get a pcp too. i need it for the blood marrow thing they said i need apcp bc of the fainting thing#its judt bsd luck. i just happene to hsve a fainting spell a couple days b4 the call#it doesnt rly mstter. i dont faint often its like every 2 months maybr. and its always my fault#i dont know what it was last time i think i was just overstimulated and maybe hungry#and that time at work was um. hunger anyways#and most times b4 that it was hot showers or baths or blood or whatever. it doesnt matter#and of it is a deepseated issue and ill die from it..idk. i dont want 2 get it checked out bc then ill habe to.pay.to.get it fixed#and i dont hsve a job which means my family will have to apy to get it fied and who cares#its probably just a blood pressure things and the doctors would just. idk. not getting into it#i just dont think it matters i guess. if i die i die and then its not my fault yk NFNFJG#and i wont die its judt lightheadedness and somrtimes fainting. and i can get on the ground usually
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:3
#some tag rambles bc im having a bunch of loz thoughts to hey why not do a short lived tag ramble#starting with the bad i have thought more on how i feel totk fucked up its characters and its like. yeah any arcs that are there are bad#zeldas is dogshit all of the sages are just. VERY tell no show and it really doesnt matter and otherwise idk#nothing wrong with a static character but imo with a static character you then have to show more of them#reveal some things. also doesnt really happen. the main speaking cast are also kinda weak in relation to link#they dont really work off of him very well bc hes… not treated like a character. hes just some virtuous everyman in the story#so theres no actual chemistry between him or the other characters bc he isnt treated a character so like. he has almost no chemistry#its all mostly one sided and none of the sages but zelda have any real chemistry with other major characters either#and the major characters zelda has chemistry with barely matter so fuck it. like when ppl talk abt like. loz stories#and ppl talk abt how yeah they arent the best but totk is rlly bad. i dont feel like any other loz stories are baaaaad#not in the same way. but they dont feel as egregiously fumbled. imo its bc of the characters most of them time#ofc story can be strong enough and im not discounting stuff like mm and oots themes and atmosphere and stuff#it seeeems to me the most popular non zelda sage is tulin? but mostly bc hes a sweet kid and thats fine and all but there doesnt seem to#be much else to him hes otherwise kinda unremarkable bc he just doesnt do much else and seems to exists mostly to serve gameplay and plot#botw did it better bc the champions actively had a dynamic and a relationship with link they arent the deepest but they have more substance#botw zelda is arguably the strongest character in botw with a unique personality and genuine relationship to link even if we just see it#in the memories and seeing her warm up to link is cool but imp they fumble it in the ending of her arc and how it kinda contradicts stuff#and in totk they doubled the fuck down on her unlocking her powers for reasons related to link and decided ig shed figure she needs to be#links forever bestie and hypeman and she kinda just revolves around him in a really superficial way and this is the negative extreme#of a character being bolstered by being connected to link. but anyways in loz its the characters that tend to be the strongest points#and the characters with a clear dynamic and relationship to link shine the most. think groose ghirahim ravio midna fi marin linebeck sheik#the list could go on but the characters who get a chance to shine by interacting with the Player Character are the ones who stick out#and ofc they get more screen time but they cant avoid that character development or general character fleshing out bc they are in some way#tied to link and in a sort of way link himself is more fleshed out through how those other characters react to him if that makes sense#i think loz is at its best when a good bit of emphasis and effort is placed on characters and character relationships#and when thise relationships and character are written well ofc this fucking matters too#anyways thats why ph is one of the best we love our character heavy black sheep them ds characters carry so hard and so fucking well mwah
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hhhhh.
#the sky speaks#pregnancy tw (im not pregnant dw lol)#baby fever moment....................#the other day my mom was like i mean u know u dont even rly need a partner to have a baby. u could get artificially inseminated#and like. i KNEW that was an option but hearing someone say it out loud .................................#like i shouldnt have a baby rn. im not making that much money . am i even emotionally mature enough to raise a kid ?#but also if i had a kid sooner than later---the pregnancy would be covered under my parents health insurance ..#nd i know my parents would help me raise the kid! if anything the fact that im stillat home and have a pretty good relationship w my parent#would just make a more stable environment for the kid during their early development than if i was a lil older making just enough on my own#and also i want one :((((((((((((#i know it might make finding a partner harder down the line#but i wouldnt wanna be with someone who didnt want kids anyway !! its a high priority for me !!#augh . idk#im also thinking more and more about going on T and getting a pretty big chest reduction. and wouldnt it be easier n make more sense to lik#have a kid and THEN do that lol#in some ways im like nooo im wayyy too young but. im 24. my parents had my brother at 20. i cant possibly do worse than them.#i would love the fuck outta the kid...#anywyas for now i write my bkg single dad AU and i yearn#maybe i'll talk abt it with my therapist. im getting back on her sched soon
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:))
#my bil just texted me and asked if i could make some teddy bears that i made last christmas#like if he could order them from me and i was like sure!#but then he also was like how much should i pay you for them and i'm just like????????? i have no clue how to equate monetary value to#the time i spend on making it (or i do but like ..... that feels like way too much money to ask for for me making something y'know?)#and so i just said a really low number like enough for 3-4 coffees#and like it's sooooo weird like the whole thing bc he's been talking about how i should monetise on making them since he saw the first one#made but it also just kinda makes me a bit uncomfy which it doesn't really make sense why i'm like this!!!#but it also kinda freaks me out that he wants to buy them from me bc now i feel like i need to make them absolutely perfect and just aaaaah#this is very stressful idk how people who sell the stuff they make do it#tho obvi it's different from like a stranger wanting to buy it this is like someone who's family#but yeah i'm all 🥴🥴🥴 abt it but it's too late to take anything back now! i do enjoy making them tho but yeah.. my perfectionistic side is#just like.... are u sure ur skills are good enough to get paid for this? :///#anyways i'll stop panicking abt all this once i give them to him and he says they're good or cute or something like that
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huh.
#i can’t believe my mom never told me abt my diagnosis on anxiety#how funny for me to find out while the insurance agent asked me and noted i had it on my record#like i’m surprised i got the minor diagnosis in the first place but also#it just upsets me that like. if i did have that they would deny it and refuse treatment in favor of not making me a liability#and the way they talk abt it too… the need for them to make excuses like the pandemic fucking everyone (it’s true and it fucked me over)#but it’s like. all this time you knew i could need help and they’re more concerned abt how it would look for insurance#and not really believing the diagnosis?? like idk. ik i am doing a lot better than i was last year and it was trial by fire#and i also don’t really think i should rationalize my behavior or who i am#but that anxiety diagnosis would make so much sense and why it was so hard#like there were so many things i didn’t or couldn’t do because i held myself back?#and maybe it’s anxiety. maybe it’s depression (i thought it was depression up until now and ik#doctors are capable of getting things wrong but. idk it just feels like#something like a betrayal? like not to the severity betrayal portrays but#a break of trust between my parents and i#but idk. like i’m in this scenario i would have expected this from them but also#but i’m surprised it happened in the first place and that i have the diagnosis (like maybe it’s bc#ik so many ppl who have anxiety so much worse thag the possibility of mine in comparison seems like. a joke i think)#but idk it’s not really supposed to be a competition right?#caw.txt#vent
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Bro...inhibitor ring Amy...ur mind bro....
Seriously though, while I'm of the personal opinion that her bracelets are weights like they are in the GBA games, I ALSO am a diehard fan of chaos-user!Amy. In fact, ice been saying for years now that she IS a chaos user—she just gives her more supernatural combative abilities cutesy or simplified names as opposed to Shadow's more technical naming conventions.
Storming Heart is a derivative form of Chaos Spear, which in the games looks slower and more concussive like a bomb might be. Rose Typhoon is just a Chaos Blast supplemented by the shockwaves she generates using her hammer.
I wouldn't be surprised if the more technical terms for her Invisibility and Precognitive abilities—referring to her tarot readings, accurate intuition, etc.—were something along the lines of "Chaos Shroud" and "Chaos Divination" respectively. Then there's her pocket dimension where she keeps things like her hammer and cards, so that could just be accessing her own personal "Chaos Space". Hells, she even has a uniquely strong capacity to sense the energy of other people and things, which is what makes her such a great tracker in canon, and if the energy she's sensing is actually just the chaos energy all living things naturally possess in varying strengths and signatures, then maybe she also employs a sort of "Chaos Dowsing" technique.
Idk if you can tell, but I'm a big Amy fan lol. I usually just love all-arounder characters like her—seeing how she's faster than Tails and Knuckles but not Sonic, stronger than Sonic and Tails but not Knuckles, and smarter than Sonic and Knuckles but not Tails. Also, a sweet, peppy magical girl who's greatest traits are her passion and kindness? Sign me tf up.
Would be funny for her to ask Shadow to teach her Chaos abilities now that she knows to take off the inhibitors and for him to be all ???? "What are you talking about? You use them all the time??" lol. My shadamy shipper heart would also just love to see them grow closer over this, but that's neither here nor there
i love amyyyy i love her so much. her abilities are so wild and all over the place and the moment you think deeper abt them youre like,,,, how tf does she do what she does actually why tf does she have a pocket dimension. and you're so right abt the naming thing!!
to me it just makes sense her being a chaos energy user. all the other hedgehogs can do it, she's got abilities that are very similar to theirs, it makes sense that she channels chaos energy too. if sega weren't cowards, she'd have a super form by now 😔
also hilariously enough im in the middle of drawing a short lil follow up comic to my last one w that premise :3c sneak peek
#asks#wip#amy rose#shadow the hedgehog#sonic fandom#sonic fanart#comic#chaos amy au#my art#fanart#digital art#im personally indifferent to shadamy but i do love them being close friends regardless of ship or not
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self care.
info : moze x gn!reader, fluff, semi-hurt/comfort if you squint, scenario warnings : mention of killing & feeling inhuman, joke abt the intimacy of killing so slightly suggestive but nothing is actually explicitly explained or done notes : the tense is all over the place but i’ve done so much character studying of moze, i just needed to get this off my brain. tbh idk what i was even getting at with this anymore i just blanked 😹.
as inhuman as he might feel, there is no doubt that moze is mortal to the bone when he melts into your touch. it’s weird to be treated so kindly, your hands smoothing lotion over freshly washed skin, unfazed by the scars and unsightly mess that he is.
he rarely talks during these times. he doesn’t need to.
“this mask will keep your skin soft.” you start to smear a dollop along his forehead. “jiaoqiu recommended me some herbs to use”—a chuckle—“but i had lingsha double check the list beforehand.”
soft is not what moze would use to describe himself. it is not something he’d consider, built with calloused hands and eyes that have seen too much. you seem to disagree. the delicate way you handle him is as if he were porcelain, a cup that could shatter with a rough wind.
his fingers twitch. the wraps around his arms are peeled away with care, gloves having been discarded to the side king ago. every bit of skin revealed is met with a soft kiss, the press of your lips lighting his nerves.
“your hands are really pretty,” you mumble against his knuckles, catching his eye with a cat-like smirk. “shame you always cover them.”
“… it would be unwise to kill with bare hands,” he deadpans.
“true… can’t have you being intimate with others on the job.”
moze chokes on a breath, the slight flush of his ears the only give away to his surprise. “what… do you mean by that?”
“getting close and personal, skin to skin, intimate.” you nod as if that makes sense. it doesn’t. not to him at least.
the shadow guard levels you with a blank look, watching you continue on with your shared night routine as if nothing happened. it’s quiet for a while. moze is broken from a daze when you step back. curling his fingers into loose fists, he stares down at at the rough hands once concealed by his uniform.
“… thank you.” it’s quiet, a plea if anything for you to read between the lines and the unsaid. his eyes are soft at the corners. you kiss them, because of course you do.
“always.”
#! notepad.txt#—stellaronhvnters.#hsr x reader#moze x reader#moze x you#hsr x gender neutral reader#hsr fluff#moze fluff#hsr comfort#hsr x gn reader
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