#and of it is a deepseated issue and ill die from it..idk. i dont want 2 get it checked out bc then ill habe to.pay.to.get it fixed
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Visit Tumblr Blog
Explore Tumblr blogs with no restrictions, modern design and the best experience.
Last Seen Tumblr Blogs
Fun Fact
China blocked Tumblr because of pornography and censorship problems in 2013.
Text
ok sry last one. sry
#its like i know im unwell but when i go to talk to ppl abt it i just cant#it never phrases right i never actually am able to articulate how I feel because i dont really know i guess. and it feels like the words i#use r judt sort of. borrowed? i dont say things how i feel bc i dont know how i feel i say like. i say things how i think a person would say#them. and sometimes its nott acurate but i dont have anything in my toolbox thats closer#does that make sense. snd i also like. ontop of base communication issue#i dont like being honest. thats not rly it. i want to be homest bc i want help#but when i talk to a therapist im bad at telling the full like. how do explain#im bad at being like..how i actually am bc i edit mysel#and sometimes i edit tooheabily an i leave out entire bits of like. tje context i guess#which is bad im supposed to give full context but it makes me feel ill to not tell ppl what they want to hear#and obviously a therapist doesnt Want to hear anything theyre judtdoing their job#but i cant r fullt honest snd the idsue is ill focus too much on one aspect eith the therapist#snd then they think thats the only thing and then i bring in a nother thing and they like. ots too much theres not enough time to talk abt#everything bc i ramble#i dont know. i eish i knew how to properly seek help#i need to get a pcp too. i need it for the blood marrow thing they said i need apcp bc of the fainting thing#its judt bsd luck. i just happene to hsve a fainting spell a couple days b4 the call#it doesnt rly mstter. i dont faint often its like every 2 months maybr. and its always my fault#i dont know what it was last time i think i was just overstimulated and maybe hungry#and that time at work was um. hunger anyways#and most times b4 that it was hot showers or baths or blood or whatever. it doesnt matter#and of it is a deepseated issue and ill die from it..idk. i dont want 2 get it checked out bc then ill habe to.pay.to.get it fixed#and i dont hsve a job which means my family will have to apy to get it fied and who cares#its probably just a blood pressure things and the doctors would just. idk. not getting into it#i just dont think it matters i guess. if i die i die and then its not my fault yk NFNFJG#and i wont die its judt lightheadedness and somrtimes fainting. and i can get on the ground usually
1 note
·
View note