#I've heard the tags get bonus comments

[silverkrakencomics]

Hello! I'm terrible at social media, but decided to give Tumblr another go, and figured I should start with an intro post.

I'm Maryanne, and I write and draw comics when I can, and sometimes I write and draw other things.

My comics are usually weird, often silly, typically cute, sometimes sad, and occasionally epic.

This is my website:

And here's a piece of art!

A personification of the galaxy AM 0644-741 (aka the Lindsay-Shapley Ring).

[ramblingautisticman]

Here is part 1 of my new series 'And They Were Gamers!', a series in which Logan and Wade play video games and be cute and gay- enjoy!

I'll be posting it here and on A03! I've got about three-ish chapter ideas/things I'm writing, any suggestions or idea please comment!!

(Based on this post!)

(Tagging @ineffable-monster-romancer because you gave me the idea for the tiny house and flowers!!)

------------------------------------------

It had started simply. Wade scrolling through YouTube at 3am due to insomnia, and wasn’t that how most things started?

He was used to staying up late, his body refusing to give in to the tiredness running through him. Logan had tried to get Wade to sleep easier- tried to find a way to get him relaxed enough to pass out- but nothing had seemed to work, so he did continued to do what he always had, didteacting himself with his phone until he either fell asleep or it was morning.

Eventually, he moved from tiktok to Youtube, and after awhile he found a video that seemed interesting. Something about a game called Minecraft. He had heard of it- the kids at the mansion had talked about it briefly when he was there a few months ago- but he had never actually seen it. So he pressed play and lay in bed watching it, finding himself quickly enamored in the video.

Before he knew it, he had spent the next 5 hours watching videos and looking up the different versions, and quickly it had become something he needed to play.

It seemed like a fun little time waster for when he couldn't sleep, plus, it seemed very relaxing compared to the other games he enjoyed.

So when Logan finally stirred, Wade had quickly started rambling about it, telling him anything and everything he could about the game- coming up with 100 and 1 reason as to why he should buy it- and even if Logan had no clue what was happening, when he left to go shopping and left Wade to watch even more videos about this game, he threw in the copy of Minecraft Wade had wanted (and yes, he had to message Laura to ask what one Wade needed for the switch thingy he played on, and spent a good hour being annoyed at how many different versions of it there seemed too be).

When he came home, Wade had helped bring the groceries to the kitchen, spending the whole time talking about a video he had watched about someone making a castle in the game- and by the end of his ramble- the only thing left in the bag had been the game.

Wade had nearly exploded with excitement when he saw it, quickly wrapping his arms around Logan in a bone crushing hug and thanking him about 50 times, before grabbing Minecraft and rushing over to his Switch.

And that was Wade for the next 3 days solid. It was all he did, and thank god they had no missions, cause honestly? Wade would've probably just taken the thing with him.

Luckily, Logan found his excitement over it cute so he was allowed to get away with not doing much else. And it seemed to be helping Wade when he couldn't sleep which was a bonus.

After about a week, Wade had greeted him at the door after walking Mary Puppins, tears in his eyes as he held the screen up for Logan to see.

"My dog died!! I had him since the first night! And now he's dead and I didn't even get to finish the dog house! Stupid fucking skeleton shot him!! I'm such a bad dog owner! Don't let Mary near me!!" He cried, tears now rushing down his cheeks, a frown on his face.

And Logan really didn't know what any of that meant, but he didn't like Wade being this upset. And he didn't like hearing him think he was a bad dog owner. "Hey, it-s okay- you are a real good papa to Mary." He said softly, gently holding the dog closer to Wade, watching as she licked his face.

It seemed to help alittle, Wade gently holding her with one arm, kissing her forehead before looking back to the screen of his Switch. "I wanted to make him a house...I was so close to getting a nametag for him.." He muttered, looking back up at Logan with those big sad eyes that made his heart ache.

"I'm sorry baby, why don't we cuddle up on the couch? You can show me the monster farm thingy you were making, yeah? Maybe you can get another dog?" He suggested, gently guiding Wade to the couch and gently sitting down, listening as Wade slowly explained that the monster farm was called a 'Mob Spawner', and that he didn't know if he could find another dog because of where he lived.

Logan thought that maybe it would pass in a few days, but Wade was still heart broken about his Minecraft dog, and Logan needed to fix it. So, he devised a plan. Well- him and Laura.

It seemed that Wade had messaged her about it, because she knew exactly what Logan was on about when he had sent her a text for help. Initially, he just thought that Wade could find another dog, and even though that was technically true- Wade didn't seem very happy at the idea of going and getting another one. Something about not wanting to go exploring and loosing all his XP if he died.

So Laura suggested something else. She had suggested that Logan learn to play it so that he could go and find Wade a dog himself. Which made him very very confused. He wasn't good with technology- had only just figured out smartphones- but he wanted too. Wade deserved to have his dog back, and here he was, sneakily using Wade's switch to try and learn the game.

It took a few days to get the controls down, but Logan quickly got used to them- and honestly? He began to understand why Wade loved it so much. The relaxing music, the cute animals, the addition he was gaining to mining.

Now, playing it himself, Logan understood why Wade had gotten so upset when his dog died. It was easy to get sucked into the game- to shut your brain off while collecting wood or getting attached to a chicken you managed to hatch from a random egg- and it made him want to get Wade his dog even more. That, and play it with Wade himself.

It took another few days to get a dog. He had to wait for Wade to go on a mission, but as soon as he left the apartment, Logan booted up Wade's world and got to work. He still wasn't good- he had to Google a few things- but eventually he found and tamed a dog.

Logan spent about an hour getting it back to Wade's house, and then proceed to spend another hour figuring out how to fish for a name tag. As soon as he started fishing, he realized that maybe he was enjoying Minecraft more than he had expected. It surprised him to enjoy a video game- he had only ever really played a few in the 80s with the kids at the mansion- but here he was, 4 hours later still playing.

He hd originally just wanted to get a dog for Wade, name it Mary Puppins and be done, but he couldn't help but get more and more into it as he contuined to play.

At first he realized Wade didn't have an anvil, so he went mining for iron. Then he needed some more levels for the name tag to make sure he didn't used Wade's, so he went and killed some mobs. Then he decided to make the dog alittle house, even if it was just a square of wood, then he found some flowers and decided he wanted to decorate with them.

Before he knew it, Wade was opening the door and loudly announcing he was home. Logan tried to save and exit the game quickly- but as usual- Wade was faster than he was, quickly looking at Logan with a confused expression.

"What is this??? Your using technology beyond an old android? Am I dreaming?" Wade said dramatically, taking his mask off and plonking down next to Logan on the couch. "Wait...why are you on Minecraft?.."

Logan looked up from the Switch and over to the man sat next to him, blushing slightly, as if he'd been caught with his hand in the cookie jar. "Oh well- you seemed so sad about your dog- ya know? And I wanted to cheer you up, so I messaged Laura and she said about me finding you a dog so you didn't die with your XP, so I tried to join on a different profile thing but I couldn't, so I logged in on your one- I promise I didn't lose any of your XP or use any of it- and look! I found you a dog- and I called her Mary Puppins, and I even made her a house! Also, I found some red and yellow flowers, so I thought that would look nice....." He rambled, suddenly worried he had upset Wade. Should he of asked before he played? Did he mess the world up?

He held the screen infront of Wade- the same way Wade had done to him a week and a few days ago- and glanced at it, pointing at the little dog. "It's a grey dog, so I thought she kinda looked like Mary, ya know?.." Logan added, looking back at Wade, who seemed to be crying? Shit.

"Sorry- did I ruin it? I just wanted to help- I can get rid of the dog hou-" like usual, Wade interrupted him.

"Oh my god! Peanut! That is the most amazingly romantic thing that someone has ever done for me! You learned how to play it- and then got me a new dog?? And you got yellow and red flowers to decorate? Our colours!? You are the most amazing boyfriend ever!! I'm going to keep her so safe in her adorable little house and-and I'm buying you a Switch and we are going to play together and make a house together and we can put our beds together!" Wade rambled, somehow with on breath, and Logan couldn't help but smile widely at his excitement.

He kissed Wade's cheek softly before handing over the console. "Yeah, that sounds good...I've already been looking at one actually- Minecraft is really fun. And I'm glad your happy." Logan said softly, laughing alittle at how stupid it was he was nervous about this. It was a video game, why did he need to be anxious?

"Oh, I am buying you whichever Switch you want, I'm buying you Minecraft, and we are going to spend the weekend making the best house ever." And honestly? Logan wasn't going to argue.

[iliveforyouilongforyouvesuvia]

M6 and MC during a storm or other bad weather event? Can be as fluffy or as angsty as you please.

(Bonus: What kind of umbrella would each LI have, if any?)

The Arcana HCs: M6 during thunderstorms

~ the way my mind gets flooded with serotonin just thinking about thunderstorms XD I've added some pics of the kinds of umbrellas I think they'd use too ^.^ thanks for the prompt anon! - brainrot ~

TW for mentions of panic attacks in Julian's and Portia's sections and tooth rotting fluff in general

Julian

HATES thunderstorms

They take him right back to the night he lost his family, until he's a scared little boy holding his baby sister and waiting for his parents to come save them all over again

Just the sound of rain alone used to send him into panic attacks as a kid and young teen, but he's been an adult on his own for a long time at this point and it's rare for him to have that reaction now

That doesn't stop him from getting anxious though

He'll alternate between uncharacteristic silence and feverish chattering, making overly casual comments on the weather

He will also be laser focused on you. He knows it's irrational, but he's got a deap-seated fear that the storm will take you from him too and he will follow you like a shadow

He doesn't want to become a nuisance though, so he'll be fussing over you nonstop - layering you with blankets, insisting you eat or drink every thirty minutes, dosing you with vitamins, etc

Of course, you love him, so you find a way to make things bearable

The sound of thunder and sensation of cold rain bother him the most, so cuddling in bed where it's warm and dry and the blankets can muffle the sounds is ideal

The best is when you ask him to read out loud to you. He gets to be close to you, make himself useful, and stay distracted all at once. Just don't let him have coffee, the jitters will send his anxiety through the roof

(He rarely uses his umbrella, but it's as gothic as he is and has a raven head carved in the handle)

Asra

LOVES the rain

Their magic is water-affiliated as it is, and you're telling them that everything's being splashed with it? Well what are you waiting for, MC, it's clearly time to go outside!

Constant smiling and giggling

The streets are almost completely empty because everyone sane is staying inside, and he takes full advantage of that. It's the most childlike, playful, and hyper you'll ever see him

Tag, you're it!

They'll run and give chase for as long as you can manage it, and as soon as one of you slows down they're pulling you into their arms to dance. Don't worry about the music, they'll make it happen somehow

Kisses in the rain with his hair plastered to his face will never not be delightful. He won't hold still for very long though, if you hold him too close he'll take it as his invitation to tickle you and run

Puddle-jumping competitions for the biggest splash

If you're not in the city, oh boy, they're hunting for the biggest mud pit they can find and pulling you into a match

Does not have the healthy fear of lightning that he should. Will stand in the middle of a field or try to climb a tree for a better view, and you have heard him at his loudest when he shouts back at it

The foamiest hot bath when you get home, they'll spend the rest of the evening curled up with you in front of the fire with hot chocolate

(They don't like using their umbrella anyways, so it turned into a magical art project)

Nadia

Rain holds unusually fond family memories for her

For starters, it usually signaled a drop in temperature, which was a welcome break in the tropical Prakran climate

But back home in Prakra with six busy older siblings and royalty for parents, thunderstorms were when everybody took a break and spent the day together in the palace with games and tea

She doesn't have to think twice about continuing that tradition with you

She'll usually give everyone the afternoon off once basic Palace upkeep tasks are finished and spend it with you

She loves sitting on the veranda with you in the afternoon, commenting on the lightning and listening to the thunder and rain, drinking tea with you and telling you stories of her childhood

As soon as it starts to get dark she's taking you inside and putting together a dinner in the kitchens. You and the palace chefs know she doesn't really cook, so they'll leave some "ingredients" to find

"Ingredients" often being a cold roast bird of some kind, a freshly baked loaf of bread "hidden" in the cupboard, a bowl of greens with the dressing on a different table, and two "forgotten" plates of dessert

You don't know if she knows that kitchens aren't usually like that, and you have no intention of telling her otherwise

She'll retire with you to her chambers early, so she can lie in bed with the windows open and listen to your voice and the rain

(She has a collection of umbrellas for different outfits, mostly used for garden events)

Muriel

You didn't expect it, but Muriel feels supremely at peace when it rains

As a kid, it was one of the only times when the city would get quiet. He could go out in the rain, and just for once, walk as far as he wanted to without bumping into anyone or being looked at

He could stand in the middle of the widest street and hold as still and breathe as deeply as he wanted to without a single person yelling at him to move

And nobody wanted to attend the roofless Coliseum when it was raining

Out in the woods? It's even better

He takes a quiet pride in knowing that for once the forest is louder than the people are

And the cold doesn't bother him in the slightest

There's a part of the hut roof that juts out by several feet and he keeps a stool there. He'll lean back into the tree roots and stone wall, watching the curtain of rain an arm's length away with a contented smile

To him, rain sounds and smells like freedom and new beginnings

He'll never pressure you to join him, but he'll be so happy if you do

It's an atmosphere where he's the most at home in his own body, so you can expect him to initiate a lot more physical touch

He'll be comfortable enough to pull you into his lap and wrap a cloak around the two of you to keep you warm and dry

Gentle kisses against the cold stone, wrapped up in his warmth and a thick blanket while the earth smells fresh and the rain tap dances on the leaves all around you

(Asra got it for him as a gag gift and he unironically adores it and uses it all the time)

Portia

She gets super irritable when it rains

Do you know? What hair like hers likes to do? When it gets this humid? Do you know? How much time it takes? To clean up the bucketloads of mud? That Pepi tracks all over the floor?

Yeah, she didn't think so

She doesn't talk about it (and frankly, she's not the introspective type, so she might not even be aware of it) but the trauma of that shipwreck stays with her even if she can't remember it completely

So no, she doesn't get flashbacks or nightmares, but as soon as it starts thundering she's plagued with a sense of unease and danger that she just can't shake

She also associates it with watching her teenaged older brother panic and meltdown, which isn't the most positive memory

And of course, it doesn't help that rainy days mean keeping a very active person cooped up inside with nothing to do but keep house

She'll spend the first few hours obsessively getting her space in order - meal prepping, cleaning, organizing, list-writing

It's better not to get involved until there's nothing left for her to do

That's your cue to help her tie back her hair, brew some soothing tea (or something stronger, if she's really fidgety) and sit with her on the couch while she talks a mile a minute all about her week

It will take a few years, but eventually she'll come to associate rain with you so strongly that she might even come to love it

(She likes having the brightest, most distracting umbrella possible for such miserable weather)

Lucio

He doesn't like thunderstorms. At all

He's generally tougher than he acts - he grew up with Morga as a parent, after all - but his brand of bad weather as a kid was snowstorms and blizzards and fierce winds

Not all this business with metal-attracted bolts of sky electricity and sudden, loud noises and water that makes everything muddy and gets everywhere (especially on the dogs!)

Unless it's impossible, he's spending thunderstorms inside, no matter how tight your budget is

As soon as it becomes anything more than a light drizzle, he's cancelling all of today's plans and going off in search of affordable, effective shelter

If he had it his way, he'd do his best to sleep through the whole weather event hunkered down beneath a pile of quilts and blankets

The problem is with Mercedes and Melchior. They love the rain

There's mud! There's exciting new smells! Let them out, let them out to play!

And Lucio, of course, will let them out like the doting dog dad he is, and then they'll come back inside with their white fur drenched and matted with mud and shake it all over everything

The only thing all three of them agree on is that lightning and thunder = bad

The dogs of course have sensitive ears, and no matter how many times he hears it, it always makes Lucio jump (too unexpected)

Your cuddles will be desperately sought after and much appreciated

(The first umbrella is the one Lucio wanted to buy. The second is what he got, because it needs to fit in his traveling pack)

[intoanotherworld23]

Right And Wrong

Pairing: Reader x Bradley Bradshaw

Warnings: Some swear words, brief mention of sex

Length: 2.2k+ words

Summary: Working for a company that makes and builds different jets for naval bases has been an experience over the past year, and on top of that you have the best co workers and boss. Until one day the son of the owner shows up to change everything

I honestly really like this one and I hope you guys do too, and would love to receive honest feedback from everyone on this so far! If you want to be added to a tag list please let me know and I will be sure to add you! Hearts, reblogs, and comments would be very much appreciated!! Thank you all so much!! XOXO

✨Please do not copy and paste my work or steal my work or publish my work or I will have you reported✨

"Please tell me," your friend came running up to you nearly out of breath her eyes wide like she had the biggest news to tell you. "That you have heard."

"Heard what?" Setting your bag and coffee cup onto your desk as you sat down in your chair. She was always an energetic person in the morning, and you were kind of the opposite.

"I can't believe he's actually coming in today." She exclaimed as you just stared at her still completely confused to what she was talking about.

"Who?" You asked having absolutely no idea who she was talking about.

"He's never come into the office before, and nobody knows why." She kept rambling on like you already knew exactly who she was referring to.

"Who?" You asked again but she kept mumbling in disbelief and you were starting to get a little annoyed with her.

"Okay you better start talking soon or I'm throwing my coffee in your face." You threatened jokingly not in the mood to play her little mind games.

"Bradley Bradshaw is coming in today." Shrugging your shoulders having no idea who she was talking about or why this man was so important. "Oh come on you can't tell me you don't know who he is."

"Can't say I've ever heard of him." Turning around in your chair as you started typing an email.

"Well you better act like you know him when he comes in." Crossing her arms across her chest a warning in her tone.

"Is he like royalty or something?" She scoffed at your response.

"Basically." Leaning against your desk as you looked back up at her. "He's the son of the company’s owner."

"Oh yeah right I thought the last name sounded familiar." Snapping your fingers as you finally remembered the last name.

You'd only been working at this company for about a year, and were still learning new things every day. You worked for a company that made jets, and sells them to different naval bases across the nation.

You knew who ran the company, but you've only met the man a couple of times in meetings. He seemed like a really sweet man, and seemed like the type of man to take care of his employees. You were just hoping his son was the same.

Jake Seresin was actually your boss, and everything you did was ordered by him. Jake was cocky and would flirt with you, but he was never rude or incredibly demanding of you. He has never crossed the line with you, and could actually be very nice. Never yelled at you or threatened to fire you. He was the perfect boss.

"I've heard his son is a major asshole." Well there goes that thought of him being nice. "But he is devastatingly handsome and single."

"Let me guess," you started off saying as you fully turned your chair towards her." He's a major playboy."

"I mean yeah." She shrugged like it was no big deal. "He's got women kneeling at his feet."

"Why does that not surprise me?" Your voice dripping with sarcasm as you chuckled.

"Once you see him though you'll see why girls throw themselves at him." She raised an eyebrow at while puckering her lips.

"Yeah the fact that he is worth millions and millions of dollars has nothing to do with it." Shaking your head as she just rolled her eyes at you.

"I mean the money is just an added bonus." She argued back.

"So for all you know he could be a millionaire with syphilis." Her mouth going wide open with a grin as your choice words.

"God that would suck if he does have something gross." Frowning disappointingly at the thought of her hopes and dreams getting crushed.

"Good morning ladies." Jake greeted as he looked up from his phone.

"Good morning Mr. Seresin." The both of you said simultaneously with a warm smile. Your friend twirling her hair in her finger as he bit her bottom lip enticingly.

"I hope you two aren't gossiping already." He chuckled being one of those bosses who bantered back and forth with his staff.

"That's how we get through the day sir." You joked as he shook his head with a huge smile

“Well try and play nicely girls.” Giving you both a sly wink as he stepped into his office.

"I'm gonna fuck him one day." She whispered loud enough for you to her as you almost choked on your coffee.

"Jesus Christ." Covering your mouth with your hand as you looked at her with wide eyes and she just laughed. "Could you be a little more blunt."

"Every single girl in this office would jump at the chance to get in his bed." She responded back as you just shook your head at her.

"Do all you think about is sex?" Nudging her shoulder as she giggled.

"Don't act like you wouldn't jump his bones should the opportunity arise." She was right but you weren't going to admit that out loud.

"Some of us can keep our legs closed." Squinting your eyes as you smirked at her.

"Once you see him shirtless you won't be saying that." She said in a sing songy voice.

"I have some dignity."  Trying to not picture him shirtless now.

Now curious to what his body looked like, but having a good idea with how thick his arms were through his shirts. Even his thigh muscles bulged under his dress pants. The man looked like he took care of himself, and worked out everyday.

"Whatever I'm gonna go back to my desk." Waving her hand in defeat as she trudged back to her desk as you laughed at her.

She welcomed you on your first day with a friendly smile and helpful hand. Showing you the ropes, and shortcuts to things that they didn't teach you. Since then the two of you have become like best friends, and we're constantly hanging out and over at each others places. You were just thankful to have a friend like her.

Going through paper work and emails starting your day off right away. It was Friday and you weren't wanting to spend one extra minute after work trying to catch up. You were wanting to leave soon as possible, and open a bottle of wine and watch your shows. Jake was usually good about not stacking up the work load on your shoulders.

Although he was quite impressed how quickly you could keep up even having no experience in this kind of field before. He was just lucky he had someone like you to make his job easier, and he paid you very well too.

If Jake wasn't your boss you probably would have tried to date him. Or at least be more flirty with him, and probably tried to get him into bed. He was good looking, and was used to girls swooning over him.

So engrossed in your work that you didn't even hear someone walking up to your desk, and stopped in front of you. Feeling a shadow you slowly looked up to see a tall and hulkish man standing there with a grin on his face. Staring at him with a stoic look wondering who this man was.

He had on a very clean and expensive navy blue suit. His hair was perfectly combed back his blonde highlights exposed under the ceiling lights. The one thing that did stand out about him though was the trimmed mustache under his nose. Most men looked like cheesy porn stars with mustaches, but he actually looked really good in it.

"Can I help you?" Asking him as you stopped typing.

"Yeah is Jake in?" He asked looking over to where his office was.

"Do you have an appointment?" Chuckling at your question like you told a joke.

"I don't need an appointment sweetheart." He clicked his tongue at you, feeling your lips turn into a frown.

"Uh yeah you do." Answering him no amusement in your voice.

"All you gotta do is take those pretty hands of yours and pick up that phone and call your boss." His tone condescending towards you leaning back in your chair in disbelief at how he was talking to you.

"Or.. you can come back when you have an appointment." Snapping back at him but he just laughed lightly at you.

"You're new here aren't you?" Cocking his head to the side not in the least bit deterred by your tone.

You weren't going to let this guy upset you or get you frustrated. It would look bad on you if Jake saw or heard what was going on, and how you presented yourself to a potential client. How you act reflects on the man who owns this company, and that could mean your job. That's why you just decided to ignore his question.

"No appointment. No Jake." Standing your ground as you stood up crossing your arms under your breasts.

Watching as his eyes dropped down to your chest to whatever exposed cleavage he could ogle at. Hearing yourself scoff in disgust at this man already not liking him based off his whole demeanor and mannerisms. This man was one false move away from getting slapped.

"Do you know who I am sweetheart?" Raising an eyebrow at you as he stepped closer.

"No and quite frankly I could care less." Lifting your head up so you could look into his eyes.

"You've got some balls on you sweetheart." He was impressed that you weren't afraid of him, but also found it funny that you had no clue who he was.

“Bigger balls than what you’ve got.” Mumbling under your breath but he still heard you anyway.

“Keep talking sweetheart and you’ll find out.” His tone darker and deeper you visibly gulped at his threat.

"Stop calling me sweetheart."

"What's your name then?" He asked as he was standing so close you could smell the coffee on his breath.

"Like hell I'm gonna tell you my name." The man in front of you continued to smirk at you as you had one of disgust and distaste.

The two of you were just standing there staring at each other the other one refusing to back down first. It was like a challenge to you, and you were determined to win. Not even noticing that other people in the office were watching the two of you like a show down.

The tension was so thick between you two it could have been cut with a butter knife. At some point you felt like your body was starting to gravitate towards him, and you were getting lost in his eyes. This man was incredibly handsome but he was a major asshole the way he walked in here like he owned the place.

"Hey man I didn't even hear you come in." Jakes voice echoed as he walked towards you both stepping back from the man still maintaining eye contact.

Silently thanking Jake for coming out when he did otherwise things could have gotten worse. Jake clearly knew the man, and you almost blurted out what a major asshole he was being. Biting down on your tongue though not wanting to piss off Jake.

"Yeah sorry I was just talking to this beautiful woman." He complimented and you held back the fake gag in your throat.

"Yes she is beautiful and she also happens to be my very best employee." Turning to Jake to give him a very weak smile. "This is Y/N."

"Perfect name for her." This man was grinning like the Cheshire Cat rolling your eyes when Jake wasn't looking.

"She's been taking care of me for about a year now." He was singing your praise your ears felt like they were on fire.

"I'm sure she has." His tone and words like he was trying to say that Jake was meaning something else.

"I'm glad that you could come in at last minute." Focusing his attention on the man now as you just stood there.

"Of course you're my best friend I'd do anything for you." Great just your luck the two of them were best friends.

"I know it's a lot to ask of you." Now you were wondering what was going on looking away trying to act like you weren't paying attention anymore.

"Yeah of course anything for my fathers company." Your ears perked up as you shot your eyes over to the arrogant asshole who was smirking at you.

"F-father?" Stuttering as you looked over at Jake praying that you heard him wrong.

"Yeah his dad owns this company." Your stomach dropped and you wished the floor would swallow you whole. "This is Bradley Bradshaw."

"Nice to meet you sweetheart." Using the same pet name you hated before daring you to say something in front of Jake.

"I'm glad you two could meet." Jake having no idea of the interaction that you two just had. You were just gonna have to grin and bare it.

"She and I are gonna have a good time." Scrunching your face up wondering what he was meaning.

"What?" Your voice hushed as you had a look of panic that you hoped Jake didn't spot. "What does he mean?"

"Bradley's gonna be working here." All the background noise was now completely silent as you just stared at him a blank expression. "He's gonna be your boss for the next year."

[runnning-outof-time]

Birmingham | Tommy Shelby x Reader (Part 16)

Previous Part

Pairing: Tommy Shelby x reader

Summary: Some of (Y/N)'s past comes to light during the drive to Sheffield. She’s finally able to speak to her brother, and have the upperhand for once…until things change on a dime. Thankfully Tommy's there to back her up. After everything goes down, her mum is the first thing she can think about.

Warnings: language, strained familiar relationship, psychological abuse, weapons, violence (typical to series), character death, mentions of drinking

Word Count: 3151

A/N: alright, y’all…here’s the chapter. It’s all going down here. I hope that it doesn’t disappoint given this type of material isn’t what I normally write. A big shoutout is in order for @peakyscillian , who helped me with the structure for a part of this chapter. Also bonus points if you can pick out the line of Garrett’s where I channeled Fitzgerald from The Revanent. Enjoy ! :)

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(Y/N) kept her hands twisted tightly together in her lap as she stared out at the road ahead of her. With each second that passed, her grip got stronger. It was to the point where her fingernails were digging into her skin, but she didn't care. She needed some way to alleviate this nervous feeling that was bubbling up inside of her.

"Are you ok, (Y/N)?" she heard Tommy ask beside her. His voice made her look over at him to see that he was taking quick glances in her direction in between staying focused on the road. He must've seen the death grip she had on herself.

"Honestly...no," she answered, exhaling a long breath then. "I...my mind's not stopped since we've left Birmingham."

"What's going through it?" he asked, glancing in her direction once more.

"I can't stop thinking about what we're going to do. It's not quite the homecoming that anyone first thinks of," she responded, a bit of a nervous laugh bubbling past her lips after she finished speaking.

"(Y/N), if you're having doubts about being the one who..."

"No. It's not doubt about that," she abruptly cut him off the second she realized the direction his statement was heading in, "I'm the one who's going to do this. I need to...for my own sanity and for the hope that I can gain some peace moving forward. I will go about every day in a much calmer state of mind once I know he's no longer a threat to my mother or I."

Tommy slowed the car down and pulled over to the side of the road after noticing the shift in her voice as it faded out towards the end of her statement. He knew that her past with her family was complicated, but the extent of it had never been shared with him. Seeing her sink further into herself the closer they got to Sheffield made him realize that maybe now was the time to get the full extent of the story.

"Why're we stoppin'?!" Arthur called from the car behind Tommy's.

"Just stay in the car!" Tommy called back to him, killing the engine before he turned to look at (Y/N).

"What did we stop for?" (Y/N) asked a similar question to Arthur's.

"You seemed to be getting worse the closer we got to Sheffield," he told her his observation, "figured that maybe you'd need a moment."

(Y/N) was biting back her tears at this point. "I've taken one, so let's go, yeah?" her statement came out a little more forced than she'd hoped.

"Let's take another," he went against her wishes before continuing, "you said that you'd have a calmer state of mind once he's dealt with...what do you mean by that?" he decided to come right out with his curiosity, hoping that she'd trust him enough to share with him.

(Y/N) looked at Tommy for a few moments, deciding whether or not she wanted to open up and explain her past to him. Then she remembered him opening up to her about his past and what he was going through when they were at the Garrison. With a deep breath and a long sigh, she decided that he was someone she could confide in.

"As much as I hate to say it, I have not a good memory shared with either of my brothers," she started, seeing Tommy's eyebrows furrow together before she continued, "when my father took charge of the gang, he began to push the idea that a woman's place was outside the sphere of business. He brought my brothers up on that idea, so naturally they fell right into place with enforcing it. My mother...she was fine with it. It followed right in line with the Weller family's idea that a woman couldn't be the head of the gang, which was why my father took charge in the first place. But my brothers...they took it a step too far most times. They'd often take the psychological route..." she trailed off then, her voice giving out as different instances of her brothers making her feel inferior began to come to mind.

"Love, you don't need to..."

"No, I need to," she abruptly cut Tommy off, shaking her head as she squeezed her eyes shut for a moment, "maybe speaking about it will help alleviate the burden they've placed on me."

"Only if you feel comfortable," he told her, and she nodded her head before taking a deep breath.

She continued once she'd let it out slowly, "when I was younger it was the typical boys vs. girls, kid typed things. They'd tell me that I couldn't play with them, or that I couldn't be a part of the things they were doing. Clay pretty much stayed in that realm as he got older too; he'd tell me the same thing our father had instilled into our minds: a woman's place wasn't in business and that I had no need to be trying to insert myself into situations where I wasn't welcome. Garrett, on the other hand...he never knew how far was too far. He'd take every chance he got to put me down; to tell me that I wasn't good enough or that I couldn't handle anything. He liked to remind me that, because I was a woman, I was essentially useless to the family as a whole; that I'd never do anything for it like they did. He'd call me weak, he'd call me a coward...he would criticize me for staying inside and then tell me that I was making myself an easy target when I would go out. These remarks would get woven into almost every conversation we shared together, and it came up so much that I just got used to it," she paused, softly laughing to herself before continuing, "as terrible as it sounds, it was nice when he went off to war...because then I only had Clay to deal with, and he had other things going on, so letting me know my place in the family wasn't high up on his list."

"But then Garrett came back..." Tommy filled in the next part of her story when she took a moment to collect herself.

"He did. He came back even worse than he was before. His actions and ideas escalated, to the point where I had to run away," she took a shaky breath as her mind went back to the final days that she'd spent with her family. After a moment spent composing herself, she continued, "he and Clay were trying to make a deal stick...they thought they had the man to where he was going to agree, but he just wouldn't. So Garrett came up with the idea that he'd throw me in the deal as a sweetener, and after persistence from his end, the man bought it. I was to go with this man I'd never met because my brother decided that I was nothing more than a pawn to use in their business endeavors. I made it as far as the man's driveway before he had second thoughts and drove me back...he said he'd work things out on other terms. But Garrett wasn't happy about it. He thought that I was the one who made the man change his mind. He said that he would kill me if the business deal didn't go through in the end, because I would be the only reason why it wouldn’t...I left that night because I didn't want to wait around and see it through."

By the end of her monologue, (Y/N) had noticed that she now had crescent shaped marks in her wrist as a result of how hard she was pressing her fingers into it. She sniffled and reached up to swipe away the tears that were welling up in her eyes before they could escape.

"I'm sorry, I...I didn't mean to unload all of that onto you," she apologized, finally looking at Tommy again.

"Don't apologize. I'm sure doing it helped you," he brushed her off, hoping that his expression was being received as sympathetic. Inside an anger was boiling up with each second that passed. He now had another reason why this man needed to be dealt with before the sun set.

"It did," she nodded, "it's just that now my mum's in his crosshairs because she's still speaking with me, and I won't have her become even more collateral damage from my decisions. That's why I need to be the one who does this...who finally frees us from his grips."

"You're sure of it?" he checked with her once more, still not wanting to push her into something that may be too much...and if he was being honest, he wanted to do it himself now.

"I am," she answered, an assured expression on her face.

"Ok," he nodded upon hearing her answer, "are you ready to go?"

"I am," she repeated her previous response, nodding slightly as she spoke.

Tommy only nodded before he started the engine again, waving his hand out the window to get the attention of his brothers before he maneuvered the car back onto the road. (Y/N) took a deep breath as they began driving again, feeling better after getting things off of her chest. She was still slightly nervous about what was going to be done in a matter of hours, but she felt even more assured that this was the right thing to do.

——

The car was parked down the lane from the pub that Garrett frequented. Tommy had decided that they would walk up so that things wouldn't be even more out of the ordinary. Arthur and John took the other men accompanying them to where they knew Clay would be at this time. They would all make sure that Clay and his associates would stay where they were while things played out.

"You ok?" Tommy asked (Y/N) as they approached the pub.

"I am," she nodded, taking another breath to calm the nerves that were bubbling up.

"And you have what you need?" he checked, referring to the revolver he'd given her before they left Small Heath.

"I do," she answered, her hand subconsciously going to where the weapon was situated in the waistband of her skirt, underneath the flowing part of her blouse.

"Ok," Tommy nodded, stopping and turning to look at her once they were a few steps from the pub's doors. "You can do this," he assured her one last time, his words making her nod, "and I'll be in the corner of the room if things don't go as planned."

(Y/N) nodded one last time and sent him a nervous smile before she turned and walked the few steps separating her from the doors. After another deep breath, she opened them and entered the pub.

The pub was basically empty. There were a few men scattered around the decently-sized room, drinking and minding their business. (Y/N)'s eyes fell on Garrett rather quickly. He was sitting in a stool straight in front of her with his back to the door. She could have easily done the job...just pulled out the gun and taken care of him without even being five steps into the establishment. But she didn't want it to go down like that. She wanted to speak her mind to him first.

So she confidently walked up to the bar, her shoes soundly loudly off the hardwood. She could hear Tommy enter the pub behind her and from the corner of her eye watched as he took a seat at an empty table next to the doors.

Without a word, she stopped at the bar and set her hands down on it. Instead of looking at him, she kept her eyes focused straight ahead. He'd recognize her soon enough.

Within seconds, he did. "It's awful bold of you to set foot in this city after all you've done," there was a smirk apparent in his voice...there always was.

"After all I've done?" (Y/N) countered, making sure that her voice was steady, "I just came to visit mum, Garrett. It was you and Clay who..." her steadiness cracked as she recalled that fateful day. Garrett noticed this and looked to capitalize on it, but she didn't give him the chance as she composed herself and kept speaking, "this is as much my city as it is yours, and you know that," she finished off with a glare.

Garrett chuckled at her comment, unbothered by her steely gaze. "Everyone clear out!" he called to the other patrons in the bar, who promptly heeded to his request. Tommy stayed tucked in the corner, where the darkness of the room hid him. (Y/N) stole a glance in his direction to make sure he was still there. "I need to have a word with my sister," Garrett continued, his grin still present. He waited until the room was clear to speak again, "you know I don't actually know how this is still your city since you bailed on it in the middle of the night," the cockiness was present once more.

"You of all people should know why I did that," she spat back at him, not having the tolerance for him to do this now.

"Why did you even come back here?" he disregarded her statement, "did mummy write you another letter telling you how oh-so terrible things are? Did she want you to come and save her?" he was talking in a mocking voice now.

She actually did, (Y/N) thought, but didn't dare say that.

"Why did you come back here, (Y/N)? Huh?" he continued to prod when she didn't say anything, instead keeping her stone faced gaze on him.

"I came to deal with something I should have a long time ago," she answered him, her words coming through gritted teeth as she tried to keep herself calm. She'd been waiting to do this for a while now, she didn't want to mess it up or jump ahead of herself.

"Oh yeah, what's that?" he asked her, his eyebrows raised. She wasn't sure if he noticed her movement as she slowly pulled her weapon from the waistband of her skirt.

"To make sure that you can't hurt me or anyone else ever again," she told him, keeping her words steady as she brandished the weapon, holding it up for him to see. Wasting no time in pointing it at him, she kept her hands steady and her grip relaxed. She couldn't let him see how she was really feeling.

A grin slowly formed on Garrett's face as he realized what was happening now. He didn't show one ounce of fear or shock at what (Y/N) had done. "You wanna show me how much you've grown now, huh? You go to fucking Birmingham and all of a sudden you think you know how to handle a fucking weapon?!" he started screaming at her, inching closer to her as he spoke, making her shrink into herself slightly. She held the gun steady though. "Fucking show me then! Use it on me!" he taunted, moving even closer to her.

(Y/N) gritted her teeth and kept her hold. No matter how much screaming she was doing inside of her mind now, she couldn't get herself to pull the trigger. She was frozen in her spot as all of the memories of the times he'd taken this similar tone with her flooded back again.

In a flash, Garrett grabbed the gun out of her hand, managing to do so before she could even react to him. She gasped at the feeling of the weapon, and the power, leaving her hands and tried so hard to maintain her composure as he flipped the barrel around to face her, grinning like a maniac now.

"See...you don't know how to do a fucking thing. You're still the same, pathetic coward that ran away. Still scared to do anything..." he trailed off, pulling the hammer of the gun back as he kept it pointed at her. His grin grew as he stared her down. "What am I to do now? How could I possibly let you walk away from this, huh?" his final word was accentuated by the sound of the gun clicking, which made (Y/N) flinch and squeeze her eyes shut.

What brought her back was the sound of his laughter. She opened her eyes to see him opening the chamber and spinning it, seeing the bullets that were loaded into it - in all but one of the slots. He then shut it and spun it once more, eyeing her up and down as he chuckled again. "Next time you plan on killin' a person, you best remember to load your gun properly, you fuckin'..."

A loud bang sounded out in the room, stopping Garrett mid sentence. (Y/N) dropped to the floor at the sound of it, covering her head as a last ditch effort as a ringing sound took over all of her senses.

"(Y/N)!" the voice was muffled, the ringing still taking center stage. "(Y/N)!" it called again.

She didn't know how long it was before she opened her eyes again. After blinking a few times, she found Tommy kneeling in front of her. She also felt a presence to her left, but she dared not to look in that direction; knowing exactly what, or rather who, it was.

"Are you ok?" he asked her, his voice more clear now. Concern was deeply etched into his features.

"I...I think I am," she stumbled over her words, nodding slightly.

"Let's get you up then, eh?" he suggested, making her nod again as she took hold of his outstretched hand and allowed him to slowly pull her to her feet. "Are you sure?" he asked her, his eyes locked onto hers as he tried to search them; to see if he could gain any underlying clues.

"Yes," she breathed, nodding again, "is he...?" she couldn't even finish her sentence without choking up.

Tommy knew exactly what she was getting at though. "He's dead."

(Y/N) nodded at this new information. "Good," she breathed, giving another slight nod. She took a few deep breaths before someone popped into her mind. "I need to go see my mum," she said then, just barely getting the words out before she stepped past Tommy and headed for the door.

If Tommy called out for her, she didn't hear him. She exited the pub and allowed her feet to take her down the streets without much thought. She needed to see her mum, and she needed to see her now.

Next Part

Tagged: @mgcldydrms @the-anxious-youth @cloudofdisney @look-at-the-soul @elenavampire21 @mrsalwayswrite @julkaamazing @evita-shelby @lilyrachelcassidy @notyour-valentine @shelbydelrey @december16-1991 @onlydeadcells @peakyswritings @just-a-blackhole @watercolorskyy @strayrockette @peakyduchesss @alexxavicry @captivatedbycillianmurphy @yummycastiel @dark-academia-slut @tommystargirl @stevie75 @lyarr24 @signorellisantichrist @zablife @anotherblinder @midnightmagpiemama @cillmequick @l1-l4 @chlorrox @lostgirl219 @woofgocows @bdudette @mrkdvidal1989 @stephhevring @fictional-hooman @httyd-marauders @nataliewalker93 @rangerelik @thecraziestcrayon @cilliansangel @shaddixlife @tracysnook

SERIES MASTERLIST

[maaradag]

massive, rambly spoilers for the new WILTY christmas episode underneath

First thoughts after finishing: oboy, both Lee and David going THROUGH it. Bet Rob was feeling all good safe in his host chair.

The guests were Victoria Coren Mitchell (whee!), Naga Munchetty, Alex Brooker and Melvyn Hayes. I'll admit I had to look everybody's names up except VCM.

Alex Brooker's lie has been available as a clip on the BBC website for a couple of days now, so nothing new there. Delighted by the fact that Victoria's (unbroken?) streak of guessing correctly on this show continues

So for me the show proper started with Victoria's card, which oh my god, holy shit, this was worth the wait.

David looks like he wants to sink into the floor, but for me, as Lee says: "If it helps in any way, I'm absolutely loving it."

I mean this is golden. Victoria starts trying to explain David's underwear philosophy, before turning to David and checking if she's not you know, revealing too much information on national television. David who has already spent the last few minutes looking like this is his worst nightmare, reassures her that no worries, "this is dreadful". All the while Lee is clapping his hands delightedly.

(BONUS Sweet moment!. Naga patting David on the shoulder, in an attempt at reassurement, cringing too hard to be very reassuring)

I don't know who Melvyn Hayes is (I'm not British, so my bad I guess) but his small comments here and there really brought it up a notch. Could have been annoying but it was really funny.

Other nice quotes from this round:

Victoria (to David, having revealed much about his underwear habits): I'm so sorry. (Then she laughs a bit more)

David: thE biBLe AnD fifTy SHadEs oF grAy

Melvin Hayes: I'm excited! (everybody cracks up)

This was FINALLY the resolution of Lee's quest to find out what David wears underneath his clothes.

(If only I still wrote fanfiction, and if only I could ever manage to write RPF this would segment would surely inspire me. Just putting that out into the universe before going back to hiding beneath the covers)

Have some pictures of David going through it:

BONUS: Lee being a smug bastard

The Melvin Hayes story did very little for me, as previously mentioned, no clue who he was before this, and the people he mentions are people I've heard about before but also know very little. Glad everyone seems so delighted by it though.

To contrast the previous picture have a happy picture of David and Victoria being pleased by Melvin Hayes story

THIS IS MY (Feat. a Celebrity Guest whoohooo)

Yet another person I don't know who is, but Patti seemed famous and Lee was all over her which turned out to be quite funny.

Victoria's sounded familiar by any rate, like I heard it before. Delightful story anyhow, her delivery of "better still, you can be in it." killed me.

Naga with the slow reveal of it being Lee that they hadn't recognized. Wonderful! Lovely! No notes. It's great that the story wasn't true because then the digs at Lee, and the Jimmy whatshiface of it all just became the marks of a good liar

(looked it up, the guy's Jimmy Nail. An English singer-songwriter apperenly, according to google).

David used his versatile tool to make decent stomach growls. Colour me impresssed.

Last round is a classic Lee round, in which he gets an herculean task and we watch him try to reel it in. (Alex B turns out to be quite the generous laughter which is great.)

Tag yourself I'm Alex, losing it.

[litnerdwrites]

Clandestine Affairs - Lust X OC (II)

A/N: Okay, sorry for the wait on chapter 2, but it's my birthday on Saturday, so I want to get through as many of my obligations as I could so I could enjoy my weekend with it. I can't promise that the next chapter will be out in a timely manner either though, since my sister's birthday is exactly a week from mine, and I'll be prepping for hers. I'll be back at it after that, hopefully.

However, I did get myself the Waterstones exclusive edition for Throne of the Fallen. Beautiful cover, sprayed edges. No bonus content, which is sad. I really wanted to read it, but I still love how it looks on my shelf. I also really want to read Heartless by Marissa Meyres, but I'm having trouble getting started. Motivation? Anyone? On a side note, would y'll like to see me write short snippets for some fun prompts every now and then? Just for fun, and hopefully get some writing critiques if anyone has any.

Feel free to comment what you think will happen next, or what you hope will happen next. Also, requests are open, and let me know if you want to be added to a tag list. I do have some Euphemia content I'm editing. Hopefully, I'll have it up next week, if not chapter 3, since that is where things are going to start getting a bit more interesting, now that I've set things up.

WC: 1509

TW: Nothing outside the canon typical.

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 (You are here) Chapter 3

Something felt… different. 

Despite not having slept, spreading the night dancing and chatting with the Malvagi instead, Amara felt… Lighter. 

She found herself humming softly as she walked into Sea & Vine for breakfast, waving at shopkeepers setting up their stalls for the day, and even stopped to indulge in idle chatter with the few who had some time to spare. 

It wasn’t until she found herself outside of the bookstore her family ran that she felt those imaginary cinder blocks appear around her ankles again. Each step seemed to take more effort than the last, as she forced herself to lift her feet instead of dragging them, and the invisible chains seemed to double in weight as she raised her foot to remove her shoes.

Amara’s heart rate picked up with every tiny noise she made as she entered her father’s store. The click of the door opening as she turned the handle had her pausing in apprehension, before timidly pushing open, only as far as necessary to squeeze her body through. Amara stiffened further and further, for every second that the hinges creaked, or the floorboards squeaked beneath her. She flinched as the bell above the entrance rang, alerting potential occupants of presence, but when nobody came, she gently pushed the door shut, shoulder staying hunched and stiff as the bell rang again, softer this time, and the door fell shut with a thud and a click. 

It was silent for another beat, before quickly slipping her slippers back on, she creeps through the store, to the back, and finds her way to the kitchen. Only once she’s shut the door, does Amara let out a tiny, tentative sigh of relief.

Rolling up her sleeves, she begins tittering about the kitchen, grabbing eggs, flour, sugar, and other ingredients, to start on breakfast. Within an hour, the Cornettis are in the oven, and the table is set with bread, jam, and freshly brewed cappuccinos, so she took the chance to head upstairs and take a quick sponge bath before changing. She paused momentarily when she heard voices from up the hall and rushed back down again, as silently as possible while the voices turned into movement, prompting me to be quick. 

It was only when the table was set to perfection did she hear footsteps headed down the stairs. She took the opportunity to duck into the back garden, and begin setting up the various seating areas that could be accessed by a side door in the store, that leads down a quaint little path, to the back garden that overlooks the beach and ocean. 

Even without taking count, there were more boats bobbing over the water, amongst white foamed waves, now that it was daytime, then there were last night. Light reflected off of the azure pool, concealing the darkest depths below. 

Peaceful. At least on the surface. 

The thought was uncomfortably familiar. 

In the quiet of the early morning, Amara found her mind drifting back to last night. 

She had danced with the Prince until her feet ached, losing herself in every glide and tug and twirl. Music, unlike any music she’d heard in their mortal realm, echoed, even now, in the depth of her mind. Elegant, like something you’d expect to be played for nobility, yet something about that music touched her very soul, as if it somehow had hands and puppeteered her body through the motions while her mind drifted, though it never drifted too far from her dance partner. She had only really clocked the hours passing when she felt herself slump against Lust’s arm, and her breaths came out in pants. 

When she’d moved to pull away, she’d almost collapsed into the sand after feeling the white hot pain shoot through her feet. Lust gave her a crooked grin, and scooped her into his arms, carrying her to a nearby rock formation. With a surprising amount of tenderness, he’d placed her down and begun removing her shoes, the grin widening when he noticed how much she’d worn them through in the hours they’d danced, and seemed pleased by it. At some point, a goblet, likely worth more than every store on her street, filled with water, and some cookies, frosted in purple and silver royal icing. They looked like something foreign nobility would have at tea parties or concerts. 

She raised a brow at Lust, before taking a hesitant bite. The sweetness had her eyes widening and cheeks going red. Lust merely snickered at her, to which she huffed, and attempted to kick him, only for him to catch her foot easily from where he stood. With an all too calm expression, he began inspecting her foot, eyes narrowing every now and then, as though he were a doctor. He even began tutting her when she tried to pull it back. Then, that cursed demon had threatened to resort to ‘his own brand of discipline’ should she attempt to assault him again.

Her eyes snapped open, suddenly aware of her flushed cheeks, and the way she froze in place at the memory. At the time, she’d huffed and turned back to her biscuits, with red tinting her cheeks, but now, as she thought back to that moment, she felt a fluttering in the pit of her stomach. 

Anxiety, surely. 

“Amara!”

She flinched at the voice that so rudely pulled her from her thoughts. 

“Oh, good morning father,” she greets, quickly walking over to him, shoulders stiff, “Did you like your breakfast?” 

He pulled his eyes from the set up back garden, turning to examine her. 

Amara remained stiff under his gaze. 

“Breakfast was a bit… much, this morning, Amara,” he comments. “Do go easy on it tomorrow, lest we run out of food for lunch and dinner,” 

“Yes father. I’ll do better tomorrow,” 

“Oh, and Amara? Later this week, go into town and use some of your salary to buy something… respectable to wear. We’ll be having guests over next week,” 

“Yes father,” 

He smiled down at her, before pulling her forward, into his chest. 

“Alright, sweetheart. I’m going to open the shop. Make sure you have a quick breakfast before coming down to help too,” 

Amara barely suppressed her squeak as her father pulled her into his arms. 

“Y-yes father,” 

“Pardon?” he asked, tightening his grip. 

“Yes father,” 

She spoke clearly, willing herself not to stutter. She shrunk under his touch, as her father ruffled her hair, before he went back inside. 

Amara didn't move. 

Clasping her hands together, she inhaled a deep breath, before exhaling again. 

Then inhaled again. 

And released it.

Again.

Release.

Once she felt as though her nerves weren’t at risk of frying her brain, Amara went back towards the kitchen. Silently, she took in the empty platters, and cups, with little more than crumbs left over. Sighing, she began washing the dishes, putting everything away. After helping herself to the very last slice of bread, smothered in some homemade jam, she headed out to the store front. 

“That took a while. You weren’t dallying were you, sweetheart?” 

“No Father. I cleaned up, ate, and came straight out,” she quickly assures.

He ruffled her hair again, pressing down slightly harder than necessary. 

She suppressed her wince. 

“Just don’t take so long next time, alright?” 

“Yes father,” she nodded when he left. 

Amara watched as her father wandered into the back, likely going up to his study to work. As he left, the tension left her shoulders, just a little, and a sigh of relief escaped her. 

How long has it been since it happened? 

Weeks? 

Months? 

Part of her didn’t want to believe that it’d been so long since her mother had been found dead in an alley, heart carved from her chest. She’d been there for most of the night, it seemed, left to rot. Amara had broken down by the corpse, prepared for burial at the church. She’d sobbed and screamed and begged the Goddesses to bring her back until- 

The ringing of the bell drew her from her thoughts. Amara spun on her heel, ready to greet the first customer of the day, a bright, welcoming smile on her face. 

“Good mor-” 

The parchment gently landing on the desk in front of her caught her eye. 

She glanced left.

Then right. 

Then towards the door. 

Despite clearly having heard the bell ring, the store was empty, and the door shut. Nothing had been moved, or altered, aside from the tiny slip of parchment now resting on her desk. 

Reluctantly, Amra reached for it, examined it. 

Then she glanced left again. 

Then right again. 

Then she slowly unfolded the parchment.

A sharp gasp was pulled from her lips at the contents. 

She staggered back. 

The parchment fluttered from her fingers to the ground. 

Miss Willows,  I found such enjoyment in your company last night, that I find myself craving more. In exchange for a sinfully delightful reward, please come grace me with your company once more, where we shared our last dance.  Forever yours, L. 

[maochira]

Hello it's me again? My apologizes if requests aren't open or anything (or if it's too long). I wanted to request Tsuntsun Barou Shouei. Barou often acts like a tsuntsun (Tsuntsun: A tsundere but their default personality is cold and blunt), and he's a bit harsher with reader (reserved/chill). While the Ubers are chilling out, Aryu confronts this and says how it's almost like Barou has a crush on reader (very ✨glam✨ of him). Barou immediately gets defensive by this comment, going on a rant on why he would never such a person like reader. However this just becomes more proof that Barou does like reader and now every Uber is teasing Barou and calling cap to the point even Snuffy calls Barou out on the bluff. Bonus: Other Blue Lock players who aren't even on Ubers call cap as well, like Bachira, Chigiri, Isagi, or whoever you want 👍

WAIT I'VE NEVER HEARD OF TSUNTSUN BUT. I LOVE THIS SO MUCH OMG.

Requests open! - NEL assistant masterlist

Tags: gn!assistant reader, tsuntsun!Barou, reader is a lil oblivious

Series synopsis: You, Claire (@deerangle3) and Mao (me) are assistants in the Neo Egoist League. (I haven't added Claire and me to something in a while HSNFNNDSD we only make a lil cameo in this)

It's one of those evenings when half of the Ubers team asked you and your coworkers to hang out again, so of course, none of yu could say no. While Claire and Mao are mostly busy talking to Lorenzo, you find yourself in a conversation with Oliver and Sendou. You're very oblivious to it, but both of them are flirting with you.

Barou hears all of that and it makes the feeling of jealousy rise in him, although he doesn't admit it to himself. Barou mumbles something under his breath about how Oliver and Sendou are so stupid for flirting with you because you deserve someone much better than them. Aryu hears that, and without caring if anyone else hears him, he says: "Sounds like you've got a crush on (Y/N)."

Immediately, Barou gets extremely defensive and lists any possible reason why he doesn't have a crush on you. But then, that suddenly drifts off into naming all the reasons why he has a crush on you. Although, he tries to hide that and acts as if they're also reasons to dislike you.

By now, the entire room has gone silent and everyone's listening to what Barou says. He only realizes that when he finishes and he's trying to hide his embarrassment.

It's so obvious. Way too obvious. Now everyone is teasing Barou about being so obvious with the way he tries to hide his true feelings for you.

Just silly little you doesn't properly understand it and think everyone's just joking. Especially because Barou still refuses to acknowledge his feelings for you.

Somehow, a few days later even Snuffy knows about it and sometimes when you're doing work around the other teams, you can hear them talking about how they've heard that Barou has a crush on you. Only that makes you realize no one was genuinely joking when they were teasing Barou for having a crush on you.

But it's a bit weird how half of the Blue Lock members that aren't even in the Ubers team know about it. Claire and Mao probably told them. They definitely did.

[dangerously-human]

Answer the Questions and Tag 5 Fanfic Authors

I was tagged by @youareiron-andyouarestrong and @menina89 for a fanfic writer tag game, which was quite fun to do!

1 . How did you get into writing fanfiction? A lot of the very early stories I wrote down were continuations of books I read. In one of my summer journals my mom would have us keep in elementary school, I found a story extending The Littles with characters who were welcoming a new baby. See, kidfic was my favorite even when I myself was a kid! Of course, it was only much later that I heard of the concept of fanfiction, in high school. Shortly thereafter, I booked it to the school library during lunch or a free period and banged out a Supernatural wee!chesters sickfic. Created an FFN account and, as they say, the rest is history.

2. How many fandoms have you written in? Counting just what I've posted to AO3 (so not all the stuff from early childhood), and not double counting adaptations as separate fandoms, 19 so far. Not telling which, but that will be increasing to 20 in the near future...

3. How many years have you been writing fanfiction? That story I told above was from when I was 6 or 7, if you want to count that. Otherwise, somewhere around 15.

4. Do you read or write more fanfiction? Usually I'd say I read more, but it's been about even lately, particularly as I've been writing mostly for Lockwood & Co - I'm really, really picky with what I'm comfortable reading in that fandom. Lately, though, I've been reading more for other fandoms (particularly Dune and Little Women, and making a small dent in a large backlog of reading for some of my earlier fandoms, like Stargate Atlantis, Farscape, and Fringe).

5. What is one way you’ve improved as a writer? Writing conflict. It's still not something I find easy, but it's something I find rewarding, so I've been working at it. And I think I've come a long way so far.

6. What’s the weirdest topic you researched for a writing project? When I was writing my Those Binary Stars 'verse for Endeavour, I did frequent, if light, research to keep things as historically accurate as possible. Stuff like when were whiteboards invented, when did Scrabble enter the mainstream, when did people start using car seats with children and what were they like earlier on...

7. What’s your favorite type of comment to receive on your work? When somebody picks up on symbolism I infused into a fic, that's so exciting. Sometimes it's something I didn't fully notice as I was writing, which is a bonus! It's also a delight to hear specific lines that worked for a reader, or hear that everyone is in character (this is especially vindicating for minor and/or complicated characters).

8. What’s the most fringe trope/topic you write about? Probably my more explicitly religious fic? It doesn't feel super fringe most of the time, given my writing circle, but in the grand scheme, I recognize that it is.

9. What is the hardest type of story for you to write? Anything with significant plot, especially if I have to account for the passage of time. I also find major AUs impossible. Minor canon divergence, sure, especially if deviating from a particular moment in canon. Changing the setting or foundational truths about canon? Terrifying.

10. What is the easiest type? Some drabbles practically write themselves. As indicated above, I am a canon-compliant girlie. Post-canon is where it's at, although I also like magnifying a moment in canon to peel apart the layers and dive deep into the emotion. This works especially well for angstier work, which, perhaps contrary to appearances, I often find flows more easily than fluff for me.

11. Where do you do your writing? What platform? When? I mostly use Scrivener, on my couch at home in the evening, laptop propped on a pillow on my lap, horizontal to varying degrees. One day my back will hate me for this. I also do a lot of preliminary writing prep in the notes app on my phone, wherever I am (on the train, in bed, in a meeting at work, etc).

12. What is something you’ve been too nervous/intimidated to write, but would love to write one day? I've got three rather ambitious AUs in progress, which I'd love to write but I think I'd have to break them apart a bit into things I could do in stages, perhaps a series of oneshots posted out of order, like Restore the Years has turned into (but with more overarching plot). In order of increasing difficulty/plottiness: Lockwood & Co office menace Skull AU, Fringe S4 fix-it AU, Endeavour spy AU.

13. What made you choose your username? I started as visionsofmangos on FFN (and later, AO3), which was my attempt to follow John Green's idea to just throw together a couple words that sounded sort of pretty and poetic in combination but didn't inherently mean anything. (I don't even especially like mangoes, and usually spell that word with the E.) This is because I had something to post and no idea what to call myself and I was in a rush, and also because I very intentionally did not want to use the same username as I used for Tumblr - I would share my early fanfiction with my sister and some IRL friends, but my Tumblr existence was separate. (Even now, although I have my Tumblr linked from my AO3 profile, I'm more comfortable with the reverse - my Tumblr peeps are welcome to my fanfic, but I'm a little nervous about fanfic people coming to find me in a wizard hat eating mayonnaise out of the jar at midnight on this here blog, or however the post goes.) I eventually chose human_dreamer_etcetera for my "everywhere except Tumblr" username, which I used a lot as a self-description prior to that and quite like for its more meaningful poeticism.

Zero-pressure tagging @astridcontramundum, @karasbroken, @insidethekaleidoscope, @paranorahjones, and @hiddenvioletsgrow!

[lyntergalactic]

20 Questions for Writers

i was tagged by the ever lovely @oakashandwillow

1. How many works do you have on AO3? uh... are we counting works i've orphaned over the years? if not, 16 over two accounts.

2. What's your total AO3 word count? 41,118

3. What fandoms do you write for? currently, it's all star wars all the time, though there's probably going to be a one piece fic out of me soon. other fandoms i've written for include dragon age, naruto, and stranger things.

the rest of the ?s are under a cut to save space!!

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

(i promise you that) we're marching on | naruto fic, sakura-centric gen

the long and short of it | witcher fic, geralt/eskel, bonus fiberarts

the unexpected series | stranger things fic, steddie, rule 63!steve with surprise baby

quid pro quo | star wars: the clone wars fic, rex/echo, smut

the will to carry on | stranger things fic, abandoned wip, rule 63!steve

5. Do you respond to comments? i try to! i don't always have the spoons for it tho

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? surprisingly, it's not the fic that's all about grief and recovery. it's a star wars drabble, changing of the guard.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? the joke answer is quid pro quo. (because it's smut.) but most of my endings tend to be content or hopeful if not happy, so this is hard to quantify for me.

8. Do you get hate on fics? not as of yet, but given i write cloneshipping i'm honestly just bracing for it to happen at some point

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? indeed i do. i currently only have one smut thing uploaded, so idk if i can say anything for certain about trends, but given my wips... emotional sex and smut as character studies seem to be my thing.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? nope. not really my thing.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? nope! thankfully, i've heard horror stories

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? i think one that no longer exists was once translated. (i had a sad habit of deleting or orphaning things i was less than pleased with when i was younger. i know better now.)

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? ahaha yes but none of it i'm going to mention by name. all my co-written fic happened in middle school with IRL friends.

14. What’s your all time favorite ship? i'm a filthy multishipper this question is like asking me which of my hairs i like best

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? oh man. definitely the will to carry on and the couple of stranger things wips in my wip file. not that i don't love the stories anymore, but certain parts of the fandom annoyed me right out of any inspiration or desire to touch anything related to said fandom with a twelve foot pole.

16. What are your writing strengths? i like to think i'm good with characterization and dialogue.

17. What are your writing weaknesses? writing anything longer than 3k words max lmao though that has been improving lately and i have high hopes for the sev fic getting finished

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? there... there is a whole can of worms here that this question opens for me and i don't think anyone wants my ramble about dialogue, other languages, conlangs, dialects, and the effects of having been in anime fandom for so long so. this is not getting answered other than with a shrug

(unless someone wants the ramble in which case i will happily oblige)

19. First fandom you wrote for? teen titans cartoon when i was a wee thing. it was a self-insert fic that was less than a page in ms word, single spaced :')

20. Favorite fic you’ve written? this is such a cop-out answer but i genuinely don't think i can pick a favorite. maybe ordinal, just because i'm still super proud of having finished it and what i did with the characterization at missing scenes? but augh i want to put more here too

i'm tagging @bisexualdinahlance, @bilbosmom-belladonna, @cacodaemonia, aaaaand @cabezadeperro but no pressure if you're not game :> and if anyone wants to do it but isn't tagged /points to eyes /points to u

[villa-kulla]

hi! I love shoot your shot/conviction immensely and just finished my eighth (maybe?) read through of it. then I was checking tumblr tags and saw you did some "dvd commentaries" which was a fun bonus treat! I was wondering if you had any other thoughts about the series that never made it into the fics/asks? I've also been laughing to myself imagining people in the courthouse being like "I wonder what Howard's up to" and Jimmy and Kim just have to suffer in silence. Or sometime later a rumor (1/2)

(2/2) spreads that maybe somehow Howard's involved with Lalo? and Cliff is just like "I can't believe Jimmy is spreading rumors again 😔 I'll have to correct everyone." Anyway, thank you for such lovely fics and I hope you have a wonderful day!

aaaaah thank you so much! EIGHTH omg that is heartwarming 😭 Also “I wonder what Howard is up to” omg dying at the idea of rumours just trickling back up to ABQ. People all like "Oh I heard Howard's getting involved in some non-profit down in Mexico, that's so great of him!" And Jimmy and Kim knowing full well this has to be a cartel front like "Hnnngh".

And I’ve been trying to think of some ‘deleted scenes’ the past week! I don’t think there were any actual full SCENES I wanted to include and didn’t, other than the ‘theatre school’ background, which I worked into Conviction. Other than that, the fic turned out pretty similarly to the outline, give or take a few things that popped up organically. Although I definitely had a lot of behind-the-scenes headcanons about the characters, or random thoughts that didn’t end up getting explicitly worked in! Like these aren't new thoughts to the fic or anything, I'm just expanding on them a little more. Not sure if it's what you had in mind, but here are some NOW!

Wardo/Eduardo

I was soooo looking forward to giving Howard a nickname! Something about ‘Howie’ wasn’t doing it for me, and I also wanted something more Spanish. It didn’t take long to think of ‘Wardo’ which I LOVED the sound of, and, AND, it has the bonus of also being a nickname for Eduardo. So I liked them having yet another thing in common, and even their names being flip sides of the same coin:3 I also liked the idea of narcissistic Lalo sort of naming Howard in his image lol. There are parts in Conviction where I make references to Lalo ‘carving’ Howard like a kind of Pygmalion, so I think the ‘Wardo’ nickname fits in with that well.

Howard's mental state

One thing that didn’t get touched on a whollllle lot in the comments is what a bad headspace Howard is in in this fic. He’s not exactly suicidal, but there is a definitely a sort of shrugging self-destructive tendency. I see him as over the worst of his s4 breakdown, but even if he doesn’t actively want to die, he can’t really imagine the rest of his life either. So while I think a more mentally-healthy Howard would have pulled away from Lalo sooner, this Howard has much less self-preservation. As far as he’s concerned, even if Lalo DID snap and kill him, would that really be the worst thing? It’s not like he’s very happy with his current life anyways. That idea comes into a play in a few ways in the fic, but probably most obviously here, after they part ways in chapter 2:

Footsteps heavy, Howard forced himself to walk back across the empty lot, not sure why he felt so tired. He knew he’d dodged a bullet and that he was lucky to be walking back into his offices at all, but…

In some ways, he couldn’t help but think a bullet would have gone down smoother.

Oh Howard...the poor guy would almost rather get killed than continue his current life trajectory:S There are for sure other reasons he’s into Lalo, not just the appealing threat of danger, but the constant threat that Lalo could put him out of his misery is...not the turn-off it should be for him. Anyways, Howard's certainly no pushover in this fic, but he is more fragile in this fic than he thinks he is, and in a very good space to get corrupted. And fortunately - or unfortuantely - Lalo likes a project!

Cappuccino

His cappuccino for Cheryl has a peace sign as a literal peace offering, so his cappuccino for Lalo has a leaf on it. Ya know. Because he’s turning over a new leaf. Anyway lol. Follow for more heavy-handed coffee metaphors ☕ 

Lalo as a Chuck-like figure

I’d talked before about how part of Lalo’s appeal to Howard in this fic is the sense of excitement he represents, and I think that’s fairly evident in the fic. But one thing I didn’t really explore is that in some ways Howard might have seen Lalo as a new Chuck. While Howard can lead, I don’t think he actually likes the role of leader very much in this fic. I think he feels more comfortable following someone with a stronger personality. And I think he latches onto Lalo as that someone. He used to being the second in command to someone difficult, extremely intelligent, charismatic but with an edge, and also someone who requires a particular “handling”. And so Howard’s “only I can understand this man, he needs me, I’m just helping him” approach to Lalo comes easily because he already had that dynamic with Chuck.

ALSO, one thing I reeeeally wish I’d worked in, is the way Howard’s relationship ended with Chuck, and how it would have been extra rationale for him attaching himself to Lalo. I think the fact that he betrayed Chuck - and felt such guilt - would only make his sense of loyalty to Lalo even stronger. He already let down one person close to him, and that person wound up dead. So of course he could never do the same thing to Lalo. Even if what Lalo does is ethically wrong, he needs Howard’s sympathy not his judgement! Howard learned this the hard way with Chuck, and takes it to an extreme with Lalo.  Howard absolutely would have used this as a justification for siding with Lalo, and would have rationalized it as the ‘right thing to do’.

Howard’s sexual experience

It’s mentioned in the fic that Howard’s slept with men twice before Lalo, but I think he’s had a little more experience than that. Howard’s approaching the idea of ‘sex’ from a sort of heteronormative point of view, where sex = penetration. So I do believe Howard’s only tried that twice, but he’s probably experimented before that, enough to know that yes it is something he is in fact interested in. There’s “that one time in Tahoe” where he ‘properly’ slept with a man for the first time, took the top role, and it was probably an incredible experience for him. We also know Howard had a not-that-great experience with bottoming that didn’t get that far, and I imagine that was the second time he had sex with a man (aka Phoenix lol). I think the first time was so good he felt it was worth exploring again, but the second time was maybe more physically unpleasant for him. So that was enough to convince him that he could hang that part of his life back up in the closet and shut the door. But there’s not enough room in the closet for Howard’s yearnings AND all those suits lol, one was going to have to spill out again. 

Also in chapter 1 when his sexual experiences were mentioned, initially I imagined they were both affairs while still married to Cheryl. But then as I continued to write Howard and got to know him better, I found the idea unlikely. I think the first time was pre-Cheryl, and the second time was maybe while he was dating Cheryl, but before they got more serious. He would have considered it ‘one last experiment’ before settling down with Cheryl, and was maybe even relieved he didn’t enjoy it as much, making it easier to choose the more socially acceptable lifestyle.

(also while we’re talking about sex lol, in some ways I find it unlikely they didn’t use a condom in chapter 4. Two mostly self-aware queer guys who would have been young men in the 80s? Probs not lol. But again, Howard’s a little self-destructive in this fic!)

Gunplay

Normally I don’t really plan out sex scenes and kind of just like to follow the characters and see what they do. But that being said,  I knew gunplay was definitely going to feature at some point in this fic as a sexier spin on canon lol. In an early outline I actually imagined them NOT parting ways in chapter 4, and having a whole ‘montage sequence’ of them starting an affair, leading to this:

There were different ideas for this scene, some involving Howard being more involved in the gun use and actually turning it back on Lalo a little. But in the end I like how it worked out, and the way it became a kind of surrender for Howard. Also I’d never written anything remotely as kinky as gunplay before lmao, and YET...I really don’t find it that kinky to be honest, at least not the way the scene is framed. Like sure it’s a little fucked up of them lol but c’mon, it’s romantic! It’s about being recognized! They’re absolute freaks here, but they’re freaks who see each other!! As far as gunplay goes, theirs was pretty sweet lol. Anyways, Howard needed to let go, and Lalo needed someone to want all of him, and I love that that’s what the scene turned into. It’s definitely a key turning point for both characters, and so I like that it sort of feels like the fic’s ‘water cooler’ moment <3

Aaaaaanyways, there were sooooo many things about each character that I had in mind while writing, and wish I could have included it all. But at a certain point, then it starts become more of a manifest than an actual story. I could have crammed in all these ideas more explicitly, but it would have been at the expense of flow. It felt better for characters reveal themselves through action, and still operate within the structure of a story. But hopefully some of these things came across, whether as text or subtext or what!

Oh yeah, one final thing I wanted to do but didn’t: have them order takeout from pollos hermanos lmao. I love the idea of them holed up in a motel room somewhere with a pollos bag and cups on the nightstand in the background, but it just...didn’t work lol. But we can dream.

Thanks soooo much again for your nice words, and also for giving me the opportunity to ramble about my blorbos! They defs live in my brain now so it’s nice to shake them around again <3 Might pop back with some extra thoughts on Lalo's side of their whole courtship because he was going through his own progression in terms of falling for Howard, but this was getting LONG!

[peach-and-bugs]

💜 Passing Notes - Agatha Harkness xfem!Reader (she/they pronouns)💜

Modern High school teacher AU

Ch 21 💜Bonus chapter💜Ch 22

(18+ Chapter, Minors DNI, you will be blocked)

Fanfiction master list

disclaimer: don't repost my work. I only post on Tumblr and on Ao3. anything else is stolen and should be removed immediately

Summary: y/n had no intention of becoming a Westview resident again, but here they are, moving into their parents’ old home and taking a job as an English teacher at their old high school. While these sudden changes hadn’t been part of y/n’s life plan, what they really didn’t expect was to come face to face with the former graduate that her Musical performances had always been compared to during high school, Agatha Harkness. They also didn’t expect this older woman to take such an interest in her, despite y/n distant demeanor. (Two former Westview leading ladies turned high school teachers develop an interesting relationship over their first school year together)

Warnings: ✨smut✨it's just smut. (vaginal fingering; R receiving, some minor oral fixation and minor swearing) (18+, Minors DNI, you will be blocked)

Word count: 1,869

A/N: well, hello again! it's been a minute, hasn't it? but I'm back for the moment! I've been taking some time to prioritize school and my friends, but I promise I haven't forgotten about you or our lovely Agatha. at the very least, I refuse to leave this fic unfinished, so here's to getting things back on track! As always, feel free to leave questions or thoughts in my comments or ask box, and happy reading! 💜

Passing Notes Tag List: @danvers97 @romanottsmaximoff @500daysofmarissa

Agatha Harkness Tag List:

General Tag List: @summergeezburr

-💜-

There was a sparkling eagerness in Agatha’s eye as she shut her front door behind you to resume previous activities. After a flurry of stumbling to remove shoes and coats, hands wrapped around your shoulders and the small of your back, attaching to you like vines around a tree as she squeezed. She began leaving sloppy kisses on your neck to replace the ones you'd wiped away on the ride home. You gripped her shoulders tight, shutting your eyes as you took in a shivered breath through your teeth. It was clear that her foreplay in the dressing room had only been the first level of her potential. 

As she kissed you in the entryway of her home, you were consumed by her intoxicating electricity that made your head spin. Only a few thoughts could slither through your mind, and you realized only now that Agatha had time to plan this. She was always calculated and prepared. She had the time to plan out every movement, every stroke, and every breath that she’d pull from you. She was going to work you till she’d had her fill, and you couldn't be happier. 

She moved you backward, your shoulders slumping against the wall as she moved from your puffy lips back down to your throat. Her teeth had begun scrapping at your skin, elating a delicious sting that faded as soon as it arrived. She had you weak in the knees, and if she didn't get you upstairs now, she was going to have to carry you herself. But you had no doubts she would be against that idea. Your breath had quickened and you squeezed your eyes (and coincidently your thighs) tightly shut as you tightened your grip on her hair and her shoulder. You heard her hiss as you inadvertently tugged her scalp, but the noise was promptly followed by an electrifying sucking feeling against your neck followed by the smooth, soothing feeling of her tongue.

“Agathaaaa,” you said in a voice that came out as more of a whine than you intended. You'd leaned forward, your forehead against Agatha’s shoulder, your nose brushing against her neck now. You felt rather than heard the groan in her throat just before she nodded, pulling just far enough from you to guide your upstairs.

 She let you lead her into the bedroom by her hand after ascending the stairs and shut the door behind her. Turning towards you once more, you would have expected her to pounce, but instead, she’d momentarily returned to a rather gentle, sentimental state. Her hands found your cheeks, guiding your forehead to rest against hers. You warped your arms around her middle, fingertips gently scratching at her back. She shut her eyes and took in a long breath. 

“You’ll tell me what you want, right?” she asked rather quietly. You stalled for a moment before nodding. “And you’ll tell me to stop when you need me to,” she asked. You nodded again.

“I’ll tell you loud and clear,” you murmured, adjusting to moving your hand over her ear, tucking hair beyond it, and dragging the pads of your fingertips over the apple of her cheek. She opened her eyes and smiled once more. She leaned up and kissed your hairline before her gaze returned to yours. 

“I just needed to be sure,” her smile returned, bright and wide like the Cheshire she was as she turned, her hands running down your arms as she backed away from you, teasing and guiding you up the stairs. You followed with no hesitation and once the door of the bedroom was shut behind you she was on you again. She pulled you forward as she backed up, falling onto the bed with a satisfied moan reverberating from her throat. You’d never imagined Agatha would be all that vocal in bed, but something about her adamant eagerness elated something very strong from you, making your skin hot with anticipation. 

She had you straddle her waist, making it easy to push her back to the bed and unbutton her blouse. She stalled for a moment, eyes flickering between your hands and the satisfied grin on your lips as you momentarily took control of her. You revealed the black lace braw under her top and just as your hand was about to skim over her obscenely soft skin, she took your wrist in her grip. You furrowed your brow, ready to protest, but she shooshed you, cooing as she kissed your knuckles. 

“Angel, I don't know how much longer I can handle not having you tight around my fingers, so if we can please move things along, I think that we’d both appreciate it,” your eyes widened and you felt as though your ears must be steaming with the imagery that flashed through your mind. Agatha seemed to get the message as she grinned again, sitting up on her elbows as she indeed her chin, wordlessly asking you to scooch. 

You did as she asked and found yourself pressed into the pillows of Agatha’s bed as she scaled over you. Her blouse was still left open, only held together by a few buttons at the bottom. You watched with anticipation as her breasts moved up and down with each breath she took. Once above you, she nudged your attention back to her eyes with her pointer finger under your chin. 

“I never knew you found them so distracting,” she commented with a satisfied hum. “Maybe I should start wearing more lowcut v-necks,” you smiled and began to laugh, parting your lips for your own retort, but whatever words were on your tongue were quickly made incoherent as Agatha attacked your collarbone while one of her hands wandered up under the sweater you still had on. Her hands were cold against your burning skin, sending a cascade of goosebumps over your chest as she dipped into your bra cup. 

Her fingertips began to squeeze and toy with your chest, testing the waters of your pleasure with curiosity. While it was quite enjoyable, you began to squirm under her. The image of her dipping down to the heat building just below still burned into your mind as she kept at your neck. You let go of a strangled moan from frustration that had Agatha arching her brow and leaning back ever so slightly. You bit your lip, squeezing your knees together under her form and you sighed as she smiled. 

“What happened to ‘moving thing’s along’?” you murmured, reaching up to pull her head back down, bringing her lips against your own while simultaneously taking her free hand and guiding it to the button of your slacks. Her fingers fumbled for a moment too long and you took control, brushing her away as you continued to kiss her, biting her lip as you undid the button and zipper for her. You felt her brow scrunch and she pulled away from your lips with a huff of breath that fanned over your nose. 

“I don’t know if I like you doing all my work for me,” she murmured. You scrunched your nose as you laughed. 

“You're taking too long. I’m ready to get the job done myself if I-” you cut yourself off with a strangled moan from surprise as her fingertips rather roughly dipped into your underwear, gliding past your clit as she assessed the situation, shall we say. She began to slowly circle, watching your brow tighten as your eyes screwed shut at every stroke. You heard her hum against your ear as your fingertips dug into her curls, tugging with a delicious sting to her scalp. 

She dipped into you ever so slightly, teasing you with a pleased expression on her face. You grit your teeth as you waited, but groaned with relief as the pad of the thumb inched inward, finding your clit and applying the perfect gage of pressure as her two fingers finally glided in. she started out slow, as though she was still testing what was right, but quickly found a nice rhythm of swirling her thumb along with curling her fingers in and up that had you squeezing your eyes tight and making the most pleasant sounds she could never have fully imagined conjuring (and trust me, she’d imagined it). 

“You’re doing an amazing job,” she purred, leaning forward to brush her nose against your jaw as she placed warm, wet kisses as she pumped in and out. “Maybe I’ll give you one of those gold star stickers I have on my desk when I’m finished with you,” she teased, her teeth biting down on the skin of your ear as she chuckled. Part of you wanted to scold her for the comment, but the other, more devious part that was absolutely devouring the affection she was giving you reluctantly let out a throaty moan as you buried your face in her chest as she shifted to lay beside you, her hand remaining deep in its place as she pushed knuckle deep into you. 

Her pace quickened and you felt that star-striking pressure begin to properly build in your stomach, ready for you to burst. In a desperate attempt to thank her prematurely, you pulled her neck toward you, forcing sloppy kisses on her untouched skin. You absently added your teeth to the mix as you began to squeeze around her and the most gorgeous moan of pleasure escaped her chest. The vibrations of it against your lips were enough to send you over the edge in her arms and you let go of a pitched whine, hot and ready against her skin as you came down hard on her fingers. 

You felt dizzy and kept your eyes shut tight as she pulled you down, her free hand brushing away the sweaty bits of hair that clung to your forehead. She pulled out slowly and you let go of another, more pitiful whine that had her chuckling softly under her breath as she kissed your cheek, your eyes fluttering open.  

“That alright?” she asked you when you could focus on her again. Your eyes wandered to her hand, which she was moving to wipe on the blanket beside her. You reached out your hand, gesturing to her. She gave the appendage to you with a questioning look, and without much warning, you took the digits between your lips, slowly swirling your tongue around them as you tested the fruit of her labors. Her eyes widened and she might have even begun to blush, but it was hard to say with the minimal light in the room. You hadn’t bothered to properly turn all the lights on upon your arrival. There had been more pressing matters at hand, clearly.

“Well, now I’m jealous,” she said, propping her head up on her elbow. You arched a brow, letting her take her fingers back. “I didn’t get a chance to taste you,” she stated bluntly. You laughed, scooting forward to kiss the pulse point under her neck. 

“We’ve got plenty of time if you'd like a sample,” you murmured against your skin. She felt her shiver eagerly under your touch and knew you were in for it again now. 

[danpuff-ao3]

New Goals!

While writing my dear friend Bethy this morning, I sort of made the decision to scale back and rethink all of my grand plans.

Now, I am a lady who can do a lot. That ADHD + OCD combo can be good for some things, I suppose, especially when properly medicated! Accomplishing a lot makes me feel good and happy and gets me all riled up to do more! What I at times fail to remember is that this energy and focus isn't endless. And my sense of responsibility and perfectionism will mean my doom when I inevitably slow down.

My therapist and I have been working on me recognizing and celebrating what I do accomplish, even when they're not on my "list." I have a bad habit of feeling useless when I did 10 things in a day but none of them were on my "list" or in my "plans" and so I chalk the day up as a failure. It helps me to stop and look and say "Hey! I did that! That is a thing that I did and that's very cool and good of me." And that helps.

But it also helps to recognize when my Brain (also named Brian, per my friend Nina, based on a misreading of a Tweet some months ago, haha!) is getting overexcited and dancing around and adding more and more grand plans to our plate. It also helps to verbalize because, for me, and my dang Leo Moon, I need to share and to be seen and understood.

So while there is plenty I'd like to do, I've narrowed down my goals for the year to 3 pretty solid goals:

Snarry-a-Thon

Snarry Bang

Project: Three of Hearts

While the plan is to complete and submit fics for the above fests, my Project is just what I plan to work on in between times. My goal is progress there.

So regarding the above goals, this is where I'm at:

Snarry-a-Thon: Rough Draft & Edit 1 done. Off for beta reading now.

Snarry Bang: teammate chosen and as of yesterday a plan nailed down!

Project: Three of Hearts: Very loose outline. And chapter 1 done! I figured my struggle with the outline might be helped by starting it, to help give me more of a feel for characterization and dynamics. I think it helped because my "vague outline" is starting to feel a bit more solid!

WIPs I would like to make progress on this year, but am refusing to to stress about:

Dralbus fic

Scarry fic

Lavmione fic

Contempt-verse fic (Kinktober?)

Contempt-verse fic (Christmas?)

The Christmas Prince 2

Goals I've cut: mostly Year of the OTP. I wrote Again (and Again) and Lovestruck to fill YOTP prompts, but while it seems fun, it's just too much. I have been panicking in the back of my mind about what to do for a March prompt and it's just not worth it. I don't want to feel obligations to finish things out. So I'm going to remove the Year of the OTP tags from those fics and try to forget I ever heard about it. The part of me that must finish everything it starts is deeply unhappy, but I need to scrub away all sense of needing to finish it, so I don't beat myself up when I fail.

The downside is that, with the idea of doing Year of the OTP and posting a new fic every month, I would definitely have reached 100 HP fics this year! I'm ever closer to that goal, but...if not this year, then certainly next year. There's no rush, really. Also: even though the OCD part of my brain rails at this a bit, I should at least celebrate that I do have 100 works on AO3! If we could my astro meta and my old Marvel fics, I'm actually at 103!!!! (Still trying to talk Brian into accepting that win.)

The thing is, I still do a lot, even if I don't get everything I hoped or planned to do done. Other plans for the year include:

More rec lists! (And I've already done rec lists for this year so everything here on out is gravy!)

More general meta (have I done this yet? Who knows. I'm sure I'll feel inspired sometime.)

More HP Astro posts (already done! All else will be bonus!)

2 fests to run! HP Chan will wrap up next Monday, and that same day HP Fruit Fest starts!

Reading and commenting! I've already done that! And I hope to do more!

Learn bookbinding! I still have supplies to gather, but I started doing test prints of short fics to play with programs and typesetting and printing and such. That's a start!

Mostly I just want to be involved in fandom. I want to interact with my community and chat with my friends and meet new friends. I want to give as much to the fandom as I can, in whatever form I can, be it recs or meta or fics or what have you. Or even just fangirling hard on Discord servers! It would be fun to do more podcasts this year (hint hint @careofmagicalshippers and @fanficmaverickpodcast LOL.) Or...idk, what else can I do? Idk, but no stress to me! I'm here to have fun and spread love.

And I need to keep that in mind. And give myself the love of self-care. And focus more on what's fun and what inspires me over how productive I am, or being self-critical.

Do I take fandom too seriously? Mayhaps. But only because I love it so much!

Anyway, 10 points to your House if you made it this far. Leo Moon = need to share. So thank you for letting me share with you!

[swearphil]

Question: what's your fave amazingphil vid? I've been meaning to ask this for a while now but I kept forgetting so yeah it can be more than one if you'd like :))

happy nice ask day!!

omg joana, I love this question! I have three videos (and a bonus) that I think represent different eras of phil videos!

in chronological order!

Phil's Favourites: phil giving his genuine comments on items is spectacular and while he's definitely done more videos where he rates stuff, I want more of his favorites with this energy!

PREDICTING MY FUTURE: according to the tags I left on a gif set of this video, this might be the first amazingphil video I ever watched! so it holds a special place in my heart and is a comfort for me

Viewers Pick My Outfits!: there's so much to love about this video! of course there's phil getting new outfits, but we also get the introduction to the cheese costume, we get dan behind the camera, and this is where I first heard of Safiya Nygaard and I adore her!

Bonus! Phil Plays Shelter: I linked the final episode of this series on the gaming channel and I just love it so much! I care so much for all those badgers and I was so excited when they played that lynx game during gamingmas because it was like shelter

[caffeineforbucky]

As Time Goes By...(Chapter three)

A/N: This one took a while to write. I've just been so busy doing absolutely nothing all while procrastinating, so special thanks to that. No, but I really hope you like this, fellow reader. If you like the series, let me know if you want to be tagged!

(Side note: I've been playing RE8, thirsting over lady D, and dying over and over...it's going great! It's part of the procrastination...)

Also, has anyone seen the Bridgerton musical tiktoks? I swear I've had the 'burn for you' song in my head all last month and if you've been living under a rock...here's the link:

https://youtu.be/EwY9_m5qeow

Word Count: 2,299

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Fem! Reader

Warnings: I don't know....angst? As always, John Walker!?! AKA; Fake Cap. Umm...If I missed any let me know.

(A little PSA: I don't hate John Walker: or the actor. John is a well-written character. This is just strictly for the purpose of where my story is going. I'm more reiterating how Bucky treats him in the show. Thank you!!)

You groan, rolling from your left side to lay flatly on your back, arms spread out beside you. You inhale deeply, becoming aware of the moistened dirt and crushed wildflowers beneath you as they release their aromatics. Birds chirped around you, the busy sounds of traffic fading away while you lie still in the field, oxygen feeling heavy in your lungs.

"Y/N?!"

You barely heard the worrisome calls of Sam over the sound of your heart pounding in your ears. You lift your head, the view of icy mountains in the distance, blurry figures making their way towards you while you somehow managed to sit up. Your head was spinning, a sharp ache on the side of your thigh.

Your eyes flickered down, taking note of the small paring knife lodged in your thigh. You exhaled softly, nodding your head at the sight of it. "Okay," You grumble in agreement. With shaking hands, you wrap your fingers around the handle, bracing yourself by taking intervolved breaths before carefully pulling it from your thigh.

You worked fast, ignoring the crunch of rocks and dirt under the acknowledgeable footsteps of Sam and Bucky. Taking babochka, you cut off the end of your pant leg, wrapping the spandex around your wounded thigh before securing it with one of the holsters, tying the ends into a knot. You remain quiet, carefully pushing yourself up to your feet, transferring all of the weight to the opposite leg, eyes drifting up to meet the guys. "Are you guys okay?" You murmur, dusting off the clumps of dirt and dead leaves from your jacket.

"Are you?!" Sam exclaimed incredulously. "You're bleeding!" He points out, gesturing to the bright red staining the skin of your calf as it dripped down to your boot. The wrap might've held the wound shut, but that didn't mean blood wouldn't have soaked through.

"Oh, this?" You ask, glancing down at your leg, the wound throbbing in agony, but you did your best to avoid it. "I've had worse." That was true, from all those years fighting as an avenger. Getting shot, kicked, stabbed, beaten until you were purple, and undergoing mind control. This tiny stab was the least of your worries. It still hurt like hell, and you couldn't hide the discomfort in your features.

"Do you want a piggyback?" Bucky asks suddenly, slightly annoyed at your nonchalance and still concerned nonetheless. You weren't expecting it, the odd but kind offer, especially from the menace himself. Though you weren't one to pass up being carried. With a hesitant nod, you agree, watching Bucky crouch just a bit, allowing you to climb on his back.

The position was awkward for both of you. With his hands tightening on the back of your knees and your arms wrapped around his neck, neither of you could think straight. Yet, you were still thankful. The road to the airport was a long one, and you weren't sure if you could make it in your state. Bucky held you as if you weighed nothing, his super-soldier strength showing off while he carried you on his back, footsteps matching up with Sam. He didn't mind doing it, especially since he was the one who offered, and the proximity was just a bonus.

"Sorry about Redwing," Bucky muses, breaking the silence while the three of you sauntered down the empty road. There was nothing for miles, only empty plains of grass and dirt. Young trees scattered, lacking the greenery around them, evident of the cold weather in Munich.

"No, you're not," Sam remarks, narrowing his eyes to a pinprick at the winter soldier. "You've always hated Redwing."

"That doesn't mean I'm not sorry about it," Bucky grumbles, tightening his hold on you as he felt you slipping. You gasp at the sudden strength, clinging better to his shoulders as well. "How're you doin' up there?" He asks, jaw clenching from your touch.

"All things considering," You sigh, pushing aside the butterflies in your tummy at how close you were to Bucky. "I've been better. We've gotta find out where that super serum is coming from."

"Yeah," Sam chimed in, glancing at you. "-And how the hell after 80 years are there eight super-soldiers runnin' loose?"

Loud honks of a horn ring in your ears, tires treading on the gravel as an army jeep slows down beside the three of you. "So, that didn't go as planned, huh?" John chuckles, pushing the door open only for you to keep walking, paying no mind to the man in stars and stripes.

"Okay, keep going," John utters, signaling the driver to keep up as he pulls the door shut. "Look, at least we know what we're up against, huh? And I'm pretty sure it's one of the big three...so,"

"Aliens, androids, or wizards," Lemar comments as John nods his head in agreement.

"There's no such thing as wizards!" Bucky grunts, keeping his eyes forward, hands on the back of your knees.

"Fine, aliens or androids," John settles, sharing a look with his best friend beside him. "Look, it's 20 miles to the airport, and you guys need a ride. Gary, stop," He instructs, the wheels slowing down. John opens the door once again. "Get in," He sighs, motioning all of you inside the jeep as Bucky and Sam's footsteps came to a halt.

Bucky gently sets you down, taking note of the small whimpers falling from your lips. No matter how tough you appeared to be, you still carried so much vulnerability. "You okay?" He asks, eyes filled with so much concern it almost scared you. He hadn't looked at you like that in a while. "Do you want any help?"

With a soft nod, you oblige to Bucky's ask, needing more help than you anticipated. You didn't want to add any strain or force to your injury. You didn't even realize it happened, and that part of it was Sam's fault for swooping to grab you while you had a knife in hand, but you weren't going to start pointing fingers. You wrap your arm around Bucky's shoulder, using him as support while he boosts you up on the jeep after Sam climbs up first, helping you settle beside him.

"Woah!" John exclaims, almost rising to his feet at the sight of your thigh, your hands stained with blood. "Are you okay?"

With a curt nod, you adjust yourself to relieve some of the pressure while Bucky takes a seat on your left, leaving you to be right smack dab in the middle as he pulls the door shut. You blow out a breath, knowing damn well if it hadn't been for the mishap, you would've walked the damn 20 miles.

"Lemar, hand me the first aid kit," John instructs, pointing to the steel case beside his friend. You wanted to protest, but even you knew that the strap wasn't going to work. Mouthing a thank you, you take the case from Lemar's hand and clip it open.

"Okay, so we got eight super-soldiers on a bulk supply run," John continues, the jeep beginning to roll down the road. You hand the case to Sam, asking him to hold it while you searched for gauze, medical tape, and butterfly bandages, you were probably going to need stitches, but you'd worry about that later. "Why?" John asks, watching closely as you patched up your wound.

"They say their mission is to get things back to the way it was during the blip," Sam answers, handing you another strip of tape. "Maybe they're just tryna help."

"They had a funny way of showing it," Bucky adds, his eyes trained on you, a hiss slipping through your lips as you roll down the remaining spandex. You sigh in relief, the ache becoming dull as you shut the case, giving it back to Lemar.

"Better?" John asks, earning a single nod as a response. "I don't think we've properly met. John Walker," he smiles, offering a shake of his hand, but you didn't move, only staring at the outstretched palm in front of you. "Does she talk?" John mumbles suddenly, looking to Sam or Bucky for a reply.

Your eyes cast down, gaze hardening at the sight of the shield in his grasp. Flashes of Steve running through your mind, the many times he'd catch you trying to throw it like he would. Steve Rogers meant a lot to you, having joined him in not signing the Sokovian accords, being an outlaw, and helping to clear Bucky's name with Sam. So, seeing a man who wasn't Steve hold the shield awoke something in you. Something unkind and hateful.

"When she wants to," You claim, John squirms in his seat, sensing the tension as your eyes flicker to his. "And frankly has no desire to speak to you."

"You don't even know me," John defends, glancing at Bucky, a sly smirk on his lips, and Sam, who rendered quiet, his eyes looking elsewhere. John sets his attention back on you, lips razor thin.

You scoff, shaking your head softly as you fold your arms over your chest. "Jonathon F. Walker," You begin, leaning back in your seat, your eyes never leaving his. "Former Captain of the U.S Army's 75th Rangers Regiment. Graduated at the top of your class from the United States Military and the first person in American history to receive three medals of honor, ran RS-one missions in counterterrorism and hostage rescue."

John's tongue darts between his lips, a frown spreading throughout his forehead at the information you were giving him. Either you did research on him or, you just read his file, which you had done both. You were not one to go into a mission without potentially knowing who you were up against. It was better to be safe than sorry.

"So you saw the news?" John chuckles, the frown falling from his features while he shrugs. "Big deal, so did the entire world."

"Custer's Grove High school alumni."

John's smile falters.

"There you met, Lemar Hoskins and your current wife," You tilt your head in curiosity. "Olivia, right? Or am I getting it wrong?"

Clearing his throat softly, John broke eye contact with you. So you did know him, and you probably knew more than you led on. "Do they always just stare like that?" He gestures between you and Bucky, who had displayed the same distaste for him.

Sam glances beside him, observing the matched body language you shared with Bucky, its no wonder Bucky had taken a liking to you, even if he'd never admit it. "You get used to it," Sam smirks, turning his head back to Walker.

"Okay..." John drags, eyes flickering to the more sensible one of the trio, and that was Sam. "Look, that serum doesn't have the greatest track record, no offense," He waves his hand, dismissing the insult directed towards the only super-soldier in the car.

"We need to figure out where they're going. How'd you track 'em here?" Sam asks, "The flag smashers."

"Uh," Lemar murmurs, scratching the back of his head. "We didn't track them. We tracked you through Redwing."

"You hacked my tech!?" Sam gripes, straightening out his back as he sat up.

"Sorry," John laughs, "It's not exactly hacking. It's government property...kind of the government. Alright, you know things have gotten kind of..."

"Chaotic," Lemar adds.

"Yeah," John nods in agreement. "The GRC, they're doing their best to get things up and running smoothly post blip. If you guys teamed up with us-"

"No." Bucky interrupts. He couldn't let Walker finish that sentence.

"I've got mad respect for all of you," Lemar praises, looking between the trio before him. "But you were getting your asses kicked 'til we showed up."

"And who are you?" Bucky bemuses, cocking a brow at the man next to John.

"Lemar Hoskins," You mention, "I could've sworn we've been through this." You shake your head at the old man, for being 106, he couldn't hear a thing.

"I see a guy hanging out of a helicopter in tactical gear," Sam shrugs, "I'm gonna need a lot more than Lemar Hoskins."

"I'm Battlestar, John's partner."

"Battlestar?" Bucky repeats, narrowing his eyes at Lemar as he nods, confirming his alias. "Stop the car!" Bucky shouts suddenly, brakes screeching as the wheels come to a stop in the middle of the road. Bucky pulls open the handle, ducking, as to not rail his head on the bar-frame above him before hopping off the jeep.

"Look, I get it, okay?" John sighs, calling after Bucky. "I get the attitude, I do. You didn't think the shield was gonna end up here. I get it, Bucky. And I'm not trying to be Steve!"

"Good," You interject, rendering John to settle his eyes on you. "Because you will never be. And just because you're the one wielding it..." You grab the bar above your head, using it to pull yourself up. "It doesn't make you Captain America." And with that, you carefully jump off the jeep, following after the heated super-soldier.

Sighing in frustration, he rips his eyes away from your retreating figures. "I'm not trying to replace him either. I'm just trying to be the best Captain America I can be." He explains to Sam, hoping the falcon would cut him some slack. "-And it'd be a whole lot easier if I had Cap's wingman on my side."

Sam's eyes widen in surprise, his tongue darting between his lips. "It's always that last line," He scoffs, shaking his head as he jumped off the car, following you and Bucky.

John's lips thin out, face scrunching in a scowl. "Let's go," He instructs. The sound of the jeep leaving making its way to your ears.

[elriel-oblivion]

So it's been four days so here's part two 😁 Just wanted to say a huge thanks to everyone who read/liked/commented/reblogged the last part! It was such an amazing response, especially given it was my first time posting my writing here, so thanks for all the love you shared 🥰🥰

Heads up, this part is actually part one from Elain's pov. Initially I wanted to continue from where the last part left off in Elain's pov, but as I was writing the background, I realised I'd written too much to just skip when Az gets to the estate and cut straight into a continuation of part one, so I ended up rewriting the whole thing in her view. So there's no new elriel moments, but you'll get a lot of new stuff anyway 😅 I would've said you don't have to read this part to understand part three, but when I was rereading the later parts a few hours ago, I realised there's some stuff that alludes to things in this part, so I strongly recommend you don't skip this 😅😅

Also, wow, some of my fave paragraphs I've ever written are in this part 😁 Bonus points if you can find them; there are four I'm thinking of in particular 😉

Word count: ~ 3.1K. Lemme know if you'd like to be tagged/removed 😊 Next part up in two or three days 😊

AO3

Ashes from the Deep

Part II

__

It had been a pretty uneventful day as Elain worked through her new plant textbook. Feyre and Rhysand had decided to spend the weekend away at the mountain cabin, Cassian and Nesta were away doing things she wished not to think of, and Mor was at the Winter Court.

Amren had only been round in the mornings, probably to check Elain was still alive. She'd glance round the living room, examine some of those fine crystal glasses in the display cabinet and then leave. There was no difference today, though Elain always felt Amren's scrutiny upon her even when that muted silver gaze was directed elsewhere; perusing Rhys' wine collection had become a tired ruse.

So besides preparing and taking her meals with Nuala and Cerridwen, Elain had spent her afternoon with her book, making notes and copying drawings. The twins had gone off on some errands, so she'd wandered into the garden at some point to tend to her many plants, telling them how lovely they each were. The crocuses looked particularly stunning this autumn day, their pale violet colour breathing life into the shades beneath some of the trees.

With her book, she'd identified new weeds, digging into the soil to rip some pesky ones out. Sometimes she didn't want the help of a tool; sometimes she needed to feel those roots on her bare skin.

Harvesting the carrots and beetroot was also on the agenda today, along with seeding for some spectacular displays next year. She'd been collecting the seeds from some of her summer blooms, like those soft clouds of baby's breath, saving them to replant. These she sowed directly into ground she'd prepared days before, her fingers digging into the crumbly clumps of earth.

Autumn onions she'd plant tomorrow, perhaps. Feyre always remarked on how their strong taste complimented meats well, so Elain wanted to harvest some fresh for her sister for once. It'd take a few months of waiting, but there was little else better than picking out and eating food one had grown with their bare hands and the essential ingredients of love and care.

Setting her book on the patio table, Elain surveyed the garden. It was a good day's work. Plants watered and sown, weeds uprooted, and hands sweaty and soiled, Elain was proud of what she'd achieved today. There were no distractions, nothing to take her from the one thing she always found satisfaction in.

After a long shower, she found herself back in the garden with a cup of tea and a blanket. The sunset washed the sky in a blaze of red and orange glory before it yielded to the cool tones of twilight then night. Elain sat in silence, hands wrapped around her mug. How long would it be until someone's arms were wrapped around her, until she felt the warmth her sisters finally had?

Silly, these thoughts. Immortality stretched far ahead, there would be time to develop that companionship. Months and years were but a heartbeat in the life of a High Fae. She wouldn't even notice the years pass.

Or so everybody else kept saying.

With her tea finished, she perused the book of recipes she'd borrowed from Nuala. Some recipes jumped out, ingredients for which she'd been growing for a few months now. Pumpkin pie sounded especially delightful, the gourd having almost darkened and hardened to ripe quality just a couple days ago. They should be ready for harvest tomorrow.

A chill wind sent Elain inside to prepare and have her dinner in pleasant silence. Even her mind was quiet tonight. After washing her dishes, she stood by a bay window, fingers idly tapping the windowsill.

Faelights bobbed like tiny lamps, dotted through the garden. The full moon was now high in the sky, its ghostly glow illuminating the datura flowers she'd seeded half a year ago. She pulled on her blanket and went out again for a better look at those gorgeous blooms, the petals opening only at night.

Elain couldn't be happier she'd found seeds of a triple-flowered variety. They'd grown to produce large trumpets, three layers of petals ruffled against each other. Somehow she thought of her sisters as she crouched and stared at the flowers, each layer so similar, yet fighting for space and breath as it unfurled before another. It was only when they were all fully open that they could sigh along the night breeze as one, an ethereal song of togetherness, tinged with notes of poignancy, only heard by those with the will to look deeper.

The white petals were stained with velvet violet, a true vision in her garden. While the others had given her passing compliments on the flowers, Azriel had seemed stunned the first time he saw them, citing them his favourite of all the plants Elain had grown so far. Something about their shape and contrasting colours, he'd mentioned.

She smiled fondly at the memory, where his eyes sparkled as he reached for one of the soft petals.

Her hand lashed out to grab his wrist. 'Don't touch them; the leaves and stems are highly poisonous.'

His brows rose. 'You wouldn't think that at first sight. But they're beautiful, Elain. Truly magnificent,' he said, his smooth voice so low, a voice that was night given sound. And how befitting, as even those datura flowers seemed enraptured by his presence, one shy petal finally unfurling towards him.

She beamed at him. 'They like you. Flowers like it when you talk to and compliment them - but these ones haven't given me the same reaction as they have to you. I think they really like you, Azriel.'

His answering smile was heartbreakingly tender.

A few more seconds passed before she realised she still held his wrist. She silently let go.

It was a shame she'd have to dig out the datura shrub and move it inside for the winter; it did look magnificent in the moonlight.

The sky shifted past its midnight velvet, and still Elain crouched, admiring the flowers. She shivered in the night's chill. The stars above twinkled and glistened, cold and distant as ever, yet stunning - infinitely more striking than they'd ever been when she was human. A thousand different colours sparkled in that vast expanse, the moon a phosphorescent queen in the centre of her court.

The Night Court truly lived up to its name in the wee hours of the day. Its opulence never failed to mesmerise her; the enhanced Fae eyesight was at least one thing she was grateful for from this body.

Her eyelids became heavy and she yawned. Why was she still out here? It was late into the night; she should be in bed by now. But the night was so beautiful and it was so quiet and she wanted to appreciate it all just once. Just once without the expectations of others, without having to wear that miserable smile all the time.

Of course, it didn't look miserable, which is probably why almost nobody ever bothered to look deeper into Elain. She should be used to it by now, but it still felt - wrong. That most overlooked her so long as she wore a smile. That most didn't think her capable of feeling the utter bitterness and loneliness she had once seen so plain on her sisters' faces.

And in acknowledgement of her sisters' hardships, Elain didn't fault them for not looking, for not seeing her. To see past the thick blanket of darkness in one's own mind was a trial in itself. But it had been years since the war now. And still they didn't notice.

They didn't notice that Elain was being shredded from the inside out.

It was almost laughable. But not funny enough.

No, it was not funny that people still treated Elain like a child, that people wanted to keep Elain in some weird impasse of a stage between child and adult. She'd thought finally carrying out her duty and giving her hand in marriage would show everyone that she was growing up: Elain Archeron, middle born but first married. Of course it was still on her own terms, to a man whom she'd loved. A man who'd seen her through the rubble of her family's lives. But she'd overall hoped doing what was expected of her would be enough.

Clearly not. She didn't even know who she was any more. Did she ever? Everything she'd once yearned for, gone. That fragile human life would soon be just a speck on the horizon of her past.

She sighed. Rebuilding herself was going to take a long time.

But what would she have to do for people to see her, to listen to her? Throw a rage? Fall into a drunken stupor and break a few dozen bottles?

She definitely could, but those were not her. She was Elain Archeron. And so she would wait. Patience wasn't a bad thing at all; she saw it on the shadowsinger's face all the time, that tranquility and calmness she so wished to feel inside.

Azriel. Her heart softened as he entered her mind again, and she dug her fingers into the soil, if only to occupy her fidgety hands. As sure as the chaos of her visions these days, there was a mess of butterflies related to him she wasn't willing to show. Or understand.

Elain and the spymaster? Now that was laughable. Truly laughable. He was wise and patient, while she - well, everyone already thought her a child, and though he listened like no other around her, surely even he couldn't glimpse the adult she so desperately wanted everyone to see.

No, it was foolish to entertain the idea of a relationship with him. No matter how much he saw.

No matter that he was the first to see her since Graysen.

Elain exhaled. She stifled another yawn, smoothing out the soil, then brushed her hands clean. She wrapped the blanket closer around herself and stood. Twinkling stars and velvety darkness and -

There, a knot of shadows materialising at the far edge of the garden, collecting and swirling into a larger mass before Azriel himself stepped out and sagged against a tree. His shadows whirled and obscured him, a dark fire with him burning at the core.

Elain's voice left her throat before she even thought to call him and she ran over to his figure slumped in the dimness.

She couldn't help but say his name again as she neared. 'Azriel!'

Those beautiful hands fiddled with a Siphon, but he looked even worse up close. Fatigue dragged at his body, a second weight to all the muscle and armour he already had to carry. Sweat and dirt clung to him, his hair. At least the shadows were parting, swallowing each other and misting away as they often did around her. Perhaps she should ask someday why they did that. But not today, not when his breathing was so laboured.

She raised a hand - to do what, she had no idea. She couldn't just touch him right now. 'You don't look okay.'

Something else limned his features as he huffed a light laugh and said, 'I'm fine, don't worry.' His voice was raw, so starkly different to its usual icy smoothness. It was common for him to guard his emotions, but in his state, this kind of thinking was just unhealthy. What would it take for him to be honest with her?

'You don't have to pretend with me, Azriel,' she said, lowering her hand. She studied the ground, embarrassed that she'd come up to him. What could she even offer in her pathetic childlike state when he was so clearly affected by his mission right now?

His hand rose. Her heart faltered, she had to do something, and she blurted, 'Can I wash your hair, please?'

His eyes widened, his entire composure crumbling. It wasn't often that the shadowsinger looked startled, but Elain was far too shy to show that she quite liked the effect her question had on him.

'You want to wash my hair?'

His face was so exquisite, it hurt to look at it. His eyes would be even worse; it wouldn't be the first time she was rendered speechless by their kind gaze. A myriad of colours swirled in their glistening depths - gorgeous greens and brilliant browns, all so natural and rich, if only she could look at them long enough to find their matches in the garden around her. Though, his eyes were an entire spectrum of colour in their own right. How would she ever pick out each and every shade?

And if she somehow did have the courage to meet his eyes now, what would she see of herself in their reflection?

A lovesick puppy? A doe-eyed, fearful fawn?

No, she didn't want to know.

So she swallowed and focused on his hair. Perhaps this Fae eyesight was a curse, for even his hair was shockingly fascinating. Only flat black from a distance, the faelights bobbing about the trees highlighted layer upon layer of silky raven locks up close. His hair was so dark it seemed to absorb the surrounding light. Mud stained one side of his head, and it was an effort to keep her hands from brushing it away, so she said, 'I'm positive that's mud and you shouldn't sleep with that in your hair. It'll only take a few minutes.'

He ran a hand through his hair, clumps of dirt falling out.

'You've managed to get some on your face, too.' There were light specks of mud and blood across his face, a more noticeable patch along his cheekbone, thrown into sharper relief by the faelights and his own weariness. Was that a cut beneath the patch? And another on his temple?

She leashed her arms.

What had happened? He wore the signs of a fight, but why would he come here when he knew Elain was the only one home?

His eyes bored into her face, but she refused to meet them. He seemed to lean forward then, stumbling.

Ridiculous, absolutely ridiculous that he wouldn't even acknowledge he was in need. Azriel rarely stumbled. Any fatigue Elain had felt just a while ago was now burrowing down a little longer. Her voice was firm when she spoke. 'I'm washing your hair. It'll help relax you into falling asleep.'

His brows rose, but if Elain stood there one more moment she wouldn't have the courage to do anything for him. For herself - she could take care of someone else. She could do for Azriel what she hadn't done for Feyre all those years as a human.

And for Azriel, she could tend to the male who'd provided her with comfort and safety in this world of distress and danger.

So she pulled him along, clenching her jaw and refusing to look back. Her heart hammered in her chest but she continued, hand wrapped round his armoured arm. Her hand slid down to his wrist but just as she was about to replace her grip, he grabbed her other hand and pulled her into him.

The shadows instantly began to ensconce them, dozens of those cool tendrils twining like vines. The estate loomed huge before them, and Elain gripped Azriel's hand tighter. 

'My bathroom,' she said. Beneath the low whisper of those shadows, her blood thrummed, her heart so painfully obvious against her ribs now. It would be a wonder if the spymaster wasn't aware of it. Though she did hear another flutter above, right by her ear. But as expected, the shadows made quick work of their journey and she didn't have the chance to dwell on it further.

Now out of the comfort of Azriel's hold, Elain set down her blanket and made to grab a chair from her bedroom. His dark presence was so overwhelming that she exhaled lightly as she entered the room and took the chair. She dragged it to the sink, avoiding his gaze, and pulled a towel, soap and a large jug from the cupboard by the door.

As she settled the soap and jug on the sink, she dared a glance at him. He was still clad in full armour, those black scales gleaming like obsidian over his skin, his Siphons glistening jewels across his body. 'I think you'll have to collapse your armour for this,' she said.

He inclined his head and tapped a Siphon, those scales lashing back into each other with cruel elegance. They were a mirror of their master: cold, controlled and unyielding, forged from scintillating darkness. He was a night sky riddled with stars; light existed if only one bothered to look for it.

Azriel's great wings righted themselves as he stood straight, now looking smaller in just his black tunic and trousers. Something about him seemed vulnerable without the armour, so Elain breathed, 'It's beautiful, all of it.' The hulking armour, the classic simplicity of the tunic and trousers, and the male who wore them all.

He was just so wonderful, Azriel. An enigma that could see her own. Her heart clenched.

Azriel rustled his wings, colour blossoming on his cheeks.

Elain blinked and pulled the chair out a little. 'Please sit.' As he sunk down, she rested the towel on his shoulders, hovering her fingers above his forehead. Her body tensed and her fingers remained suspended. It was like a spark of tension flickered in the space between their skin, teasing her, tempting her, taunting her.

After all, she'd offered to wash his hair, an act that would certainly require touching. But why was she so hesitant? She'd touched him before - kissed his cheek, even. Although that had been in the heat of adrenaline, a mark of her gratitude where a simple thank you wouldn't suffice, not for risking his own life for hers.

This was - what was this?

She finally lowered her fingers through that tense spark, pushing his head back against the sink. It was exhilarating, this contact, but he lowered his wings, shifting on the seat. Elain moved into the space he gave, turning on the tap as he went still. Just as her body was taut, taut as the skin of a drum.

She checked the water. Warm. It was time to start.

Azriel was looking up at her. Something like yearning swirled in his eyes.

He looked so tired. It made her heart ache.

'You can close your eyes,' Elain whispered. And he did.

___

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