#I'm trying to stop i swear
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Guys I'm running outta space
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lotus-pear · 1 year ago
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god i love skk sm i wish gay ppl were real :(
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hyacinthsdiamonds · 4 months ago
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Imagine having the fastest car on the grid, but Max Verstappen lives so rent free in your head that you try to copy him instead of doing literally anything original... Mclaren, you'll never be him, no matter how many times you claim the orange army as your own!
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revenantghost · 1 month ago
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Hey, I’m just here to say you’re extremely missed and that, even though there’s probably not much I could say to make any of the bad things less awful, I’m hoping for an easier and gentler future for you soon. Take care, ok?
Oh man, thank you so much for sending this, and I'm sorry it's taken so long to respond (and to the other person who sent me an ask, too—I'm not sure when I'll get to it but please know it was seen and means so much). It has just been. So awful. I won't dump on the public at large everything that's happened, you don't need that novel, but it feels like every day life's falling apart more and more.
Just, seriously, thank you for sending this, and to the couple of people who checked in with chats (again, I'm sorry if I haven't responded yet, spoons are just very limited). There have been a lot of times throughout this where I get overwhelmed by everything going on and some truly horrific people I've met in the fandom and I've considered deleting everything permanently! Very often!!! Tbh I'm still struggling with that VERY intense urge while writing this. I feel so unsafe, and scared, and run down.
And tbh, it's really hard to believe anyone could care about me when I feel so awful and worthless, I feel like it must be an obligation, or I somehow accidentally manipulated people, but I'm trying to cling to that being the brain demons talking. Because I really appreciate the time and effort anyone's taken with me. And I really miss fandom and fun, even if it's weighed down with some significant trauma—I still love the stories and the characters and, most importantly, the amazing people I've met here. Outside of any fandom I've poked around in, the wonderful people I've met matter the most, and I'm trying to cling to that.
I really enjoy talking with everyone, running little projects/events, and for the first time in years actually writing again. (I've been slowly plucking away at that AU I mentioned a few times and I want to start posting for an event this month but! Ahhh!!!) I would like to try and be active again, and I'm so sorry for just being such an absolute goddamn mess. I feel like this is all too much to even say, but I do want to just be honest about all of it. Still, again, thank you so much for reaching out <3 And I'm sorry this is so ridiculously long even though I don't feel like I'm saying much and nothing important, I didn't intend for this answer to be a word-vomit update, just. Things suck, but you guys are good, and I hope things are as okay as you can be on your side of the screen <3
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necrotic-nephilim · 5 months ago
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What's so fun about BruJay as a ship is Jason's sheer obsessive devotion to Bruce. Jason is possessive over Bruce, to the point he doesn't care about the deaths of others so long as he has Bruce's attention. A part of the UTRH arc this isn't talked about enough is that Bludhaven fucking explodes mid-way and Jason won't let Bruce see if Dick is alive.
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batman (1940) #650
A lot of discussion about UTRH paints Jason as this anger-driven cold, calculating machine up against Bruce when it's so clear that his love for Bruce is what drives him at his root, even if he won't acknowledge it. He says it himself, he would've done anything if it was Bruce who'd died instead of him and his anger is rooted in that possessive devotion not being reciprocated.
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batman (194) #650
BruJay as a ship always to be, to some level, unrequited. Even if Bruce loves Jason back in that way, he'll never be that obsessed with Jason. Jason will always view Bruce's love for Dick or Tim to be a distraction, proof that Bruce isn't dedicated enough to him. Jason has the need to always have Bruce's attention, even when it could come at the cost of Bruce's other loved ones. Something something cannibalism as a metaphor for love in how Jason wants to consume Bruce's whole existence. He can't let Bruce leave him again, can't let Bruce love or grieve anyone else. Forcing Bruce to choose between Jason and the Joker isn't just about confronting Jason's killer, it's about confronting the other person who exists as this duality with Bruce and consumes so much of Bruce's life. That's the role Jason wants to fill, calling himself Red Hood and forcing Bruce to look at what he's become. But still loving Bruce and wanting more than anything for Bruce to reciprocate that love in the way that Jason understands. I just think it's good soup and rife with Dynamics that are underexplored with them.
#necrotic festerings#brujay#jaybruce#jaybru#jason todd x bruce wayne#batcest#i've had this thought in my head for a while#i was just weirdly shy about posting it? like convinced myself it's not as verbose as some of my other thoughts#also GOD why is the art of this arc SO BAD.#i can't take it SERIOUSLY#i hate looking at it.#the faces. why are the faces like that.#brujay needs more love bc jesus#gotham war had some good brujay content but i am still too bitter to discuss that shitshow. so. ignoring it for now.#bruce changing jason's brain chemistry as an act of love is the most FUCKED UP brujay thing ever tho#it's so Them.#sorry that is just peak brujay. they are incapable of meeting in any middle and always trying to change each other.#maybe this meta should've been about that.#but then i'd have to use new-52 and rebirth panels so eh. nvmd.#this page makes it seem like i hate post-flashpoint comics. i don't i swear#they just interest me less for batcest.#like oh yay everyone's getting along and working together.#it only came at the expense of throwing away decades of character work. small sacrifice.#i need to stop posting meta at fucking 5 am.#no one is going to see this bc i can't be a normal person.#wrote this while watching invincible#which is pretty good so far but man the ending of ep1 clocked me. i was absolutely bamboozled.#i had something else i was going to say in the tags but i lost it.#anyway most of this is a ship post and projecting shit as per usual and yk. not serious comic media.#i'm just silly and gay.
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the-eyes-of-andyserkis · 1 month ago
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Andy and Matt Reeves recording ADR for Alfred in "The Batman" (during covid!).
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klutzytomb · 26 days ago
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I never thought I'd say this, but there's no way I'm one of the only ones here that isn't chronically online. Right? Right??
#PLEASE don't tell me this is genuinely how all of you view this#I'm not gonna make a longer post unless prompted but. there's no way so many of you are this chronically online. there's just no way#I mean this is the nicest way possible btw#some of y'all need to get some friends IRL. like genuinely.#if y'all are thinking that its evil to draw teens smoking weed or for there to be 2 year age gaps in high school relationships-#you do NOT know enough people. I'm being serious#don't get me wrong; some of the things being talked about are serious issues#(I am basically only referring to Louis when I say this. I hope you're doing okay man)#but the rest is stuff that is just so stupid I swear#I don't like engaging in drama hence why I'm not gonna tag the fandom or make this a big post outside of the tags#So much of this is the kind of thing you'd see in a 2018 DA ranters video and that is NOT a good thing#the combination of a lack of nuance + being teens with no life experience + hard opinions is soooooo ass#like this feels like the beginning of a clique who hates artistic expression#I saw one of the posts talking about how people in this fandom should basically be only wholesome or else you're evil and just. What??#Not how art works. not how liking a thing works. stop trying to police the people around you#when I say 'you' I am referring to the amorphous blob of people I'm targeting this rant at and not everyone btw#and I thought that me with my mental health testing approved black & white thinking pattern was bad. god damn#sorry for these tags being so long and ranty I just needed to yap about how I think a lot of this is stupid#if anyone following me doesn't want to follow me anymore due to this that's fine. idrc tbh#I could also like explain anything I mean in an actual post if anyone is confused by any of this#but otherwise this is my two cents#andy rambles
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fisheito · 1 year ago
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i wanted to see altaria rei then i started goofin around
#the only ones i could see clearly were eevee eiden and morpeko morvay#i couldn't pin rei to a single mon bc i don't know a THING ABOUT HIM yet#but i want to see ghost type rei fight ghost type kuya and they're both just super effective against each other#i wonder if all the old men automatically get honourary ghost type membership. live 300 years ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED: spooky#ANYWAY LET ME TALK ABOUT MY LIST#as in the list i was compiling of pokemon who matched the VIBE of someone and i couldn't decide#now BESIDES the ones req et al. already mentioned. which i already 👍👍👍 i was trying to find even moooore . exploring what could be.....#rei: altaria. marowak (alolan). noctowl. chandelure. decidueye. ribombee [a quiet friend :)]. inteleon.#once again i don't know rei's birdy deal yet so i won't (eheheh) pigeonhole him into an owl pokemon but we'll just wait and see#i had inteleon under rei before milke brought up sobble yakumo so now i'm like..... oh no...#rei fits the last evol and yakumo fits the first two.... uhhhhh#they can share. like they share gem placement. butt buddies.#yakumo had: girafarig. froslass. azurill (crying). tropius. wishiwashi. leavanny. marshadow.#i just want him to hang out with the food related mons and enjoy some fresh fruit with a giant flying dinosaur. yah#OK FOR EDMOND I SAW SIRFETCH'D AND COULDN'T STOP LAUGHING#WHAT A REGAL BOY. I HAVE TO. PLEASE I NEED EDMOND TO WIELD ONIONS#i was trying to be serious and find him a proper majestic pokesona . i swear. but the look on sirfetch'd's's face#edmond's list went: skarmory. lucario. cinccino. zeraora. dachsbun.#do i know edmond? i doubt. he's fluffy. wait no he's severe. wait no would he dare carry a fluffy cakey pokemon around? DARE HE????#for olivine i was even more stumped. seems like a lot of the pokemon i immediately thought of were the fluffy nurse types#stuff like chansey/blissey. kangaskhan.#this pokemon is 100% female? *flings pokedex out the window* no. olivine is a gender now#some of the newer pokemon i considered were bewear. drampa. mabosstiff.#but once again these were all just Protective of the Little Ones types#so i was imagining olivine just chilling with his serene smile and an army of MASSIVE CARETAKER POKEMON behind him#but. there has to be more to him than just taking care of others . furrows brow. idk. i'll settle for lapras FOR NOW#ditto eiden riding on the back of lapras. wonderful. glorious#pokemon crossover
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bumblingbabooshka · 11 months ago
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Tuvok & Janeway both strike me as people who insist they aren't rich* but then they bring up a summer house or something in casual conversation *note: I'm aware that Star Trek humans live in a post-scarcity world with no money but still. I can't help but see the truth and the truth is that Janeway's fridge had an ice dispenser.
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midnight-drip · 3 months ago
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fun fact: when I was two, I had a really thick Brooklyn accent. I've never been to New York, I don't know anyone who's from New York, I don't even live in the U.S. I think I had it for a few months before it just disappeared completely.
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torgawl · 11 months ago
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this is absolutely killing me *bombastic side eye, criminal offensive side eye playing in the background*
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a-sassy-bench · 2 months ago
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previously on my life: a lot of stressful things happened. then my dog died and it totally broke me (also epilepsy is triggered by stress as an added bonus, so that's been fun). i made a poll asking tumblr what hobby i should do so i don't keep staring blankly at the wall and the winner was an old hobby i haven't done in ages. the poll worked, i feel a weird sense of social obligation now so even though i don't want to WE'RE CROCHETING BITCHES (/affectionate).
the yarn has arrived and i think i'm going to do something either from bugsnax or adventure time. i used to be really good at crochet and my best friend asked me to make them a filbo ages ago but i need some practice projects first because i haven't crocheted in years. i'm considering making small bugsnax projects and sending them in the mail to my bestie with no warning whatsoever with weird cryptic messages using letters cut out of magazines because unfortunately for us all this is just who i am as a person.
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thanks again if you voted in my weird poll, i really needed a little push ❤️
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It's so funny to me that I have so many creative things that I want to do that I'm going to like have to... make a list and pick and be like... okay Kane we are focusing on this one today right now😊
I have so many drawing ideas, I have that Winter/Christmas themed selfshipping game that I wanted to do that started on the 14th, I want to revamp my whole S/I story with Storm...
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starfilledsky2810 · 21 days ago
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damn I yap a lot
tldr; im alive, sadly im still on hiatus, other stuff is fine now I just have new [physical] problems, you'll know when I'm fully back (give it another couple months) and comfortable, I'm in a [technically well-over] 3-month long ongoing depressive episode [not tryna do trauma olympics or make anyone feel bad btw it's all chill]
so sorry if I've left you hanging [with art or smth], I'll get to it in time, I promise [I may have unwillingly forgotten, likely not but there's a chance]
Hey, I'm alive, I have been for the.. almost 6 months I've been gone. Holy shit, I didn't even realise that it's been that long. I figured I should at least say something in case anyone is worried or wondering even though everything isn't solved yet, so, here. [under the read more so it's not flooding or anything]
Also, I figure I should apologise for venting on main and just leaving it up - this is all going to stay up because I need to keep it somewhere to aid with my memory issues - but, still, must've been a little weird
Absolutely not a good time to say all this [for me bc I haven't thought this message through] but I'm kinda half-back, just on hiatus from socials due to declining physical health. Really badly declining, I need help honestly
Originally, as you know, I was gone because I had a really bad fall out with my mother, but things pertaining to that have been solved now [except me not feeling 100% safe and trusting to my mother, that will never change. She's tried hard, I just wish I could find her reliable emotionally as well]. It's just that, since then, basically, all these physical problems that I don't understand have been royally fucking me up and messing with my mental too. It's messed with everything I love. I don't know what to do anymore.
Oh wait, where I was actually going with this, so
OK nvm I forgot but you'll see me around bc I've been talking to certain people trying to pretend like nothing's happened and I've made the kinda-silly decision to not fully come off hiatus or talk to other certain people before I'm okay again.
#so the post is for the practical stuff n the tags r for emotional btw [or at least I tried to do that]#[yeah just except the para starting with “originally” I'll keep that there despite being unnecessary]#-#genuinely. im so scared. im so scared all the time [most of the time not scared of anything in particular - I mean the physical problems#fuck me up by making me scared and sad and tired most of the time for no reason]#I have no energy and it's all up and down and even though I actually feel okay rn [not good but okay] after literally breaking down an hour#ago I still know this shouldn't be happening#nobody is going to believe me if I say I have high-functioning depression. who do I tell. well they will believe me but how would it help#and I'm so scared to tell anyone for no reason. I'm not scared mentally rn but no matter whether or not Im ok the emotion stops me from#taking action if that makes sense.#--#I don't understand what I did to deserve this why is this happening to me#why are these internal problems out of my control happening to me#I don't understand and it truly deeply scares me#---#I meant to out this at the start of the tags but fuck it I'm too far in and on mobile to go all the way back now#thank you if you read this far. truly thank you because I need someone to talk to and my irl's are not an option for all different reasons#if I reach out to you about smth random please talk to me as if I'm still not half-gone.#feel free to message me whenever about wtv despite the “hiatus” I need it#... if you have read this far for whatever reason please text me that my Rui loves me my brain is trying to guilt me and say he doesn't#[that just happens when I'm in a certain state even tho that's when I need Rui the most selfship mutuals u get it pls help me out]#he. he does love me right? I swear he does I just. can't seem to believe it right now#I shouldn't have pushed all that to the bottom when it was directly telling my mutuals what I need lol#I feel a little hopeless sometimes. that's not like me I'll be alright in the end. no not that. I'll be better than alright I can fix this#I can fix this. I just need help. god I need help.#at the very least I'll be alright
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cathymee · 3 months ago
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maybe it's to maintain a sense of tension & turmoil that would eventually reach an explosive peak, a sense of tug-of-war, a back-and-forth to hammer home the ideals they want to deliver and for the viewers to chew on, but although these arguments regarding hiroshi & his stance as a man torn between his loyalty for his country & the loyalty for his Filipino friends and lover is of course important, how they write these scenes & the points they present from this week alone is getting too repetitive...? literally the argument scenes from last night & tonight between adelina & hiroshi is basically the same; the ideas were the same, the dynamics were the same: the aggressive, radical adelina, bristling rage and fear over the injustices she's seen thus far, and the cautious, inspiriting hiroshi, all hopefulness and reassurance one moment as a lover, defensiveness and sternness as a japanese soldier in another. this debate will be ever-present ofc, it is one of the series' biggest conflicts, but it is unfortunately so easy to tell when it is a.) being pulled up as a main topic to move the plot along / be a necessary conflict for character development/introspection / be the conflict to deliver the morals & messages the writers want to send to their viewers, or b.) when it is being pulled up only for the drama and filler to pass the time. like watching the characters sit down to argue for 10 minutes, do other things for the plot for 2 minutes, then sit down again to argue for the next 20 minutes. lol.
#lots of things i wish they would soon improve but this 1 bothered me tonight..stopped watching halfway thru#these scenes would be like excellent breaks for when we need to take a breather to digest what's been going on#but at the slow pace they've set it it's just...nothing's been going on since like...4 days ago#except for eduardo's plot#it's just arguments..everywhere....all the time....over the same repetitive things#no progress nothing new to chew on despite there being drastic changes to their situation...? same vibes from the time they weren't occupie#yet lol. same dynamics mostly#only new points of debate is regarding hiroshi & his country vs friends conflict#& carmela being desperate to go back to comfort & luxury vs her family standing as firm as they could against the occupation#ahhh i am sooo not eloquent enough to express my full thoughts but like!!! fellow viewers if y'all r here u understand me right lmfoskadhsg#finding it hard to criticize bc i'm trying to make sense of where they r coming from#a.) seeing as unlike mcai this is a complete original story it's hard to see what direction they'd like to take it to#b.) fil shows really find it hard to break away from their normal formulas of family dramas & bastard children & love triangles :'))))#god the opportunity to tell a refreshing diff story but this is like gma show 67627627th but set in the japanese era....then mixed with 50%#of the mcai show feel#the editing the visuals the acting = good. 60% of the story line = can be compared to the hundreds of gma shows we've seen be4#anywy going off on a tangent...#c.) i can understand the slow pacing as them trying to establish the settings & the feel of that era so that the more intense tragedies-#later on would hit harder#but again. few scenes feel like they're dragging on for too long. some scenes & themes r too repetitive#need to see something differenttt something fresh something developing. something moving & feeling & connecting w/the audience#need to see more of the Philippines & the Filipino people in the 40s!! not the same afternoon prime drama shot in intramuros#need to see their messages staring into our souls instead of just being words uttered in tears#all this to say....flop era this week tbh sorry#EXCEPT FOR MAX COLLINS & HER LIKE. 3 MINS SCREEN TIME. MAX COLLINS I LOVE U QUEEN#rambles#pulang araw#putting this in the main tag i KNOW some ppl out there would feel the same & can explain this better lol i swear????
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yellow-faerie · 4 months ago
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On one hand, I could write a fic focusing on the Handmaidens that sticks to canon and delves into their thoughts and opinions and actions in a world where their queen is dead and they are struggling for direction in a world where democracy has been destroyed
On the other hand,
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