#I'm sorry I can't save all of you right now

[surielstea]

Your Needs, My Needs

Request made by @loving-and-dreaming

Pairing: Cassian x Fem!Reader

Summary: With the return of Cassian’s ex, Reader makes the decision to distance herself from him— but hasn’t expected him to notice.

Warnings: A teensy bit of angst, mostly fluff!

A. Note: Sorry this is so short, I just began writing for Kinktober and started pouring all my focus into that and totally forgot about my reqs, hope this is enjoyable nonetheless :)

1.3k words

The past week has been hell.

Cassian and I haven't touched or had a meaningful conversation in seven days. All due to the return of his ex.

Alora was back from her three-year-long expedition of traveling courts and making connections. Cassian and her called it off before she left, it seemed mutual, and neither of them was too broken up about it so when me and Cassian got much closer over those three years it hadn't felt wrong.

But now she was back, and I was determined to save myself from the heartbreak of being the other woman.

So I distanced myself, backed away, stopped my lingering stares and cuddling on the couches, and stopped the flirty teasing and banter altogether.

We sat in the training ring, panting and out of breath, drinking from our waters silently. We used to sit shoulder to shoulder— despite the heat emanating from our bodies, we preferred to be close, but now there was a noticeable gap between us and it cleaved my heart in two.

I glance over at the winged male to see him already gazing at me. I give him a polite smile, trying not to fumble with my water as I avert my stare and place the bottle down beside my feet.

"What are you doing?" He suddenly asks and my brows crease, glancing back over to him, the hurt expression on his rough yet handsome features.

"Trying to catch my breath?" I say through a slightly dramatized pant.

"That's not what I'm talking about. You've been avoiding me, what have I done?" He narrows his eyes on me and I huff, looking away, afraid he might be able to see right through me if I held eye contact.

"I haven't been avoiding you Cass, just, giving you space." I shrug, keeping my voice from wavering.

"One and the same, what did I do?" His blunt words struck me like a slap, a frown pulling at my lips.

"You didn't do anything." I shake my head, finally meeting his hazel eyes.

"Then why give me space?" It hurt more than I expected it to, to look into those eyes after so long, torture to be away from him for only just a week. I doubt I could even stomach being around him once he got back with Alora.

"Alora returned, Cass, I figured you'd want to pick up where you left off," I explain, remaining strong on my point.

"And what if I don't want that?" He stands, now looking down on me. I mirror his position, rising onto my feet yet he still remained looking down at his nose and I cursed his tall height.

"It's what you should want," I argue with narrowed brows.

"No, what I should want is what makes me happy." His voice brooked no room for argument as he took a step forward, and for a moment he looked like he was going to reach out towards me, then thought better of it. "And that's you." He confesses.

My heart stutters at his words, fingers twitching with the need to touch him. "Cass." I sigh, shaking my head.

"Don't 'Cass' me, sweetheart." He tilted his head down at me.

"She's better for you," I murmur, shrugging and fighting my need to wring my hands.

"You think I can't decide what's best for me?" He steps closer, a dangerous distance now between us.

"No,” I blurt, my brows bunching.” I'm just trying to make all of this easier." I huff, my bottom lip now protruding. I didn’t want to argue, I didn’t want to even be bothered to discuss it, I thought this was what he would want?

"Easier for who?"

His question was met with silence as I debated the question. I thought it’d be easier for him, I hadn’t realized he would notice my distance. I was only trying to save him from having that awkward conversation with me.

"I don't want her, I want you." He reaches out, his hands cupping my cheeks. I blink in surprise, a blush staining my cheeks. He wanted me?

"But, I thought—" I begin to say but he cuts me off.

"You thought wrong princess," He smiled arrogantly, but the line between his brows told me he was still distressed. "I didn't want to tell you, I thought you might realize on your own.” He said, then let out a soft chuckle as he added, "Figured the nicknames and cuddling was enough to give you a hint."

I avert my gaze, the burning on my cheeks starting to grow overwhelming. "Sorry," I utter, wrapping my arms around myself.

His hands slip from my cheeks to the nape of my neck, his thumbs tilting my jaw up, making me look at him. "Don't apologize just, please, no more distancing yourself from me,” He reasons and I frown.

"I was only trying to protect you, protect myself," I explain my stance on our argument still not satiated.

"I don't need protection, I need you." His hands tightened around the back of my neck but it didn’t hurt, it was a reassuring squeeze, a reminder. "I'm not going anywhere, alright?"

"Okay." I nod slowly, a soft smile spreading across my lips, one I haven’t given him in the past week.

He leaned closer and my breath hitched, eyes flicking down to his lips. “I’m going to kiss you now, is that okay?” He asks and I nod fervently. A wicked smile spreads over his lips at my reaction but doesn’t leave me waiting for long before his lips crash down onto mine.

The kiss was soft, yet passionate. He conveyed every neglected emotion in that kiss, how much he desperately needed me in the seven days I didn’t look or touch him, how depraved he was. His lips were skilled, and his tongue even more so as it slipped into my mouth. I sighed softly, allowing him to explore every crook and crevice, studying and memorizing it as if for later reminiscence.

“I missed you,” He whispers into my mouth and I giggle, wrapping my arms around his shoulders, my chest pressed into his.

"You're so clingy." I rolled my eyes, feigning annoyance. He smiled wildly at that, because despite the kiss, this was normal, the hugging and teasing, he hadn’t realized how much he cherished it until it disappeared.

"Gods, I missed you so much." He repeats, a cadence in his voice that sounded so genuine, making my frown return, my hand rubbing circles on the back of his shoulder slowing.

"I thought you'd go back to her, I was only trying to help," I say softly, his eyes soften as he quickly shakes his head and says,

"I was never hers, just didn't know it until you." He leans closer and pecks my lips softly. "I'm yours, I always have been." He reassured and my smile returned, I pushed up onto my toes, connecting our lips over and over again, kissing him until we were both sick of the taste of each other.

“And I’m yours,” I confess. “I’ve always known that, though,” I say bashfully and his grin widens, feral, genuine. My hand slithered to his jaw, my thumb now tracing over the outline of his sensuous lips. “I missed you too,” I confess, even if I was the one pulling away.

“I know, sweetheart, your sorrow-filled stares were proof.” He teased and I shuddered, looking away with a bright red blush. He chuckled and brought my face back to his with a nudge of his nose. “It was cute,” He reassured me, and even if I didn’t believe him, I allowed his lips to press against mine, again, and again, and again.

General Taglist: @fxckmiup @olive-main @iluvyewman-blog @gaymistakeboi @glitterypirateduck @amara-moonlight @impossibelle @fauxdette @going-through-shit @glam-targaryen @hufflepuff-pa55 @sarawritestories @tele86 @rogerbarnesxx @azriels-shadowsinger @stinkinstuffie @sandramalikstyles-blog @sassyangel16 @lilah-asteria @starsinyourseyes @inloveallthetime @melsunshine @nighttimemoonlover @cookiemonsterwholovesbooks @cumuluscranium @adharanotfound @azrielsmate3 @aelincaddel @hiddlestonspassionsackx @dee-writes-smut @cynthiesjmxazrielslover @pit-and-the-pen @mybestfriendmademe @starswholistenanddreamsanswered @circe143 @bubybubsters @joshysloshy @username199945 @ivy-34 @notsarareallynot @vixenshiftsvrs @aurorab99 @pey2618 @mmg777 @andreperez11 @thatacotargirl @123345566 @one-big-fangirl @moonslitluna @imyherondale @salvawhxres @bookishbabyyyy @anuttellaa @breadsticks2004 @azriels-human @mamita-vera @demetercabingreen-thumb

[petew21-blog]

No way back

Richard Madden was now on top of his career. Starring in Game of Thrones and after that in many successful movies as well.

He loved his aching career and his life

Until it was taken from him. By you

You really loved him as an actor. But you fell in love with his body much more. And that's why you attacked him on the street after that play he starred in.

He put up quite a fight. But you had a knife and eventually you succeded in stabbing his shoulder. Stabbing was the crucial step to swap bodies. After that, you were now fighting your old body, that was towering over you and held a knife in your shoulder. Thank god for the police for shooting him and saving you

The ambulance took you to the hospital. He hit some of the big veins, so you were bleeding rapidly. So they had to take care of that. Some doctor stitched you up and told you you were lucky. "I know. Thank you"

You were finally left alone in your room. You went to the mirror in your gown to look at the wound and at your new self.

And there he was Richard staring back at you.

You took of the gown. Revealing the big wound and some scratches on other parts of the body.

He put up quite a big fight before you switched. If you wouldn't stab him, you'd be the one who was dead now. Not Richard.

You looked over your new shirtless body. Your hairy torso covering the muscular chest and abs. All yours now to enjoy.

Your nipples hardening at the sight of the beautiful man in front of you. And not the only thing that was hardening.

You are Richard Madden now

But the blood and scratches reminded you what you have done. That you were now in a different man's body. That you took his life and got him killed. There's no going back anymore. You can't get back to your old life, see any of your friends or your family. Or even your dog

It was all so bittersweet. Getting his body was one thing, but now you felt the guilt of it all overcoming you. You looked at yourself in the mirror and saw the teary eyes looking back. Did you screw this up?

6 months later

After dealing with the aftermath and going to therapy. You decided to quit acting for a while. You didn't even know how to act, cause Richard's memories did not stay in his body and secondly you probably wouldn't even enjoy it.

You asked for therapy after the attack a decided to pretend to have some sort of amnesia, which became an excuse for everything after that. Especially for not knowing who in Richard's life was who.

But now it didn't matters. You were in Los Angeles, Hollywood Hills. Enjoying the beautiful scenery and the sun shining on your beautiful hairy chest.

With just one bottle of water and a phone in your hand, you arrived to the place and sent the photo

"I'm here" you said out loud

From a bush, an attractive young man came out

"Holy shit, it's really you. Omg sir I have to say I am the biggest fan."

"I thought you came here to hook up"

"Yeah... right. Sorry. Sure"

You unzipped your jeans and pulled out your big dick to jerk. It was getting hard. You loved freaking out these twinks in your body. Hell, this guy's probably the same age as you were. But you're in Richard's body now, being older than him

He was shocked and just stared at you. Definitely aroused

"Are you gonna stare or take care of it?"

"I... YES! I just thought we could go somewhere private. There is a lot of rattle snakes here you know"

You came close to him. Pushing him on his knees and shoving your hard dick into his mouth

"There is only one snake you gotta be worried about right now"

You left him on the mountain. Covered in cum all over his face. You had an interview to get to. Fuck, your acting career was about to start again.

The twink caught up with you. "Can I call you? I really wanna do this again"

"Already hungry for more? This is my adress. And bring a friend"

The guilt was still deep in your heart. But moments like this definitely made it better

[nthspecialll]

Hiii! I love all your character analysis posts and theories so much, and was wondering if you have done any theories about where the gang was before Blackwater, by chance? I think I saw a post recently mentioning Montana but I can't for the life of me remember if it was you who posted it or not! 😅

But I've wondered about their locations before RDR2 a lot and would love to hear your thoughts about it. I remember reading a very early page in Arthur's journal about how they were in the Northen Grizzlies? But apart from that I can't remember anything else about locations, if there were any mentioned. And I'm sorry if you have done a post like this already, it's just a little piece of the backstory I'd like to hear theories about 😊

I have not talked about it but I definetely can! Also thank you for liking my stuff!!

Well, firstly, some places that exist in real life does not exist in red dead and those are the places on the map. Texas is New Austin, New Orleans is Saint Denis and Luisiana is Lemoyne, meanwhile Californa and New York does exist in game, meaning we can't completely be sure what places exist unless they are directly mentioned.

Firstly, we know they have been in Chicago, that is where Dutch and Hosea met! Then in 1877 the pair went to Kettering, Ohio, where they scammed 300$ out of the residents, later that year we know that they met Arthur in the Northern states somewhere, which could also be Montana! We do not know more than it was someplace in the North.

We also know some time before they met Arthur, they went to Blackwater once but exactly when we do not know.

In 1885 we know they were in Illinois, saving and picking up John Marston and two years later they robbed their first bank Lee and Hoyt, which we do not know where is.

But between then and 1898, they robbed 36 banks across the frontier as stated by Ross in rdr1, which is where we get the famous "We were told there was a price when we reached 50." The wiki page of the VDL gang does say they came to Montana in 1898 but they won't give me source to confirm it, which is a little annoying, but just mentioning it.

We know at some point between 1893 and 1898, after Bill joining the gang, they went to Canada, him, Arthur and Uncle robbing a bank together.

We also know that for a while they would return to the same places for Arthur's romances. Both with Eliza, where he could pop by every few months and for Mary, whom they at least returned to after 1894 when Abigail joined, and before the deaths of Annabelle and Bessie.

Either way, now we come to the fun parts, around winter 1898, the gang was up in what is called the Northern Grizzles, we only have access to the western (Around Mount Hagen) and Eastern (O'Creagh's Run), so I would assume that the Northen are outside the map, probably up above the Wapiti Reservation somewhere.

They traveled down the "Western Foothill of the mountians", not sure what road they took as it could be one off map, which I would honestly guess, probably traveling around the cold of Colter and coming in from left side of the map. Either way, they most likely ended up somewhere down by and Big Valley, which can match up with the fact that Arthur mentions that life was good and food was easy to find. That area does have a lot of easy food access and so forth.

Now I have seen a few people say Dutch met Micah in Strawberry, which is honestly very fair assumption, it matches up with a lot, but a simple fact is forgotten, Strawberry does not have a bar, which is where they met.

I would say that Micah most likely had been in Strawb and done, whatever business he had with Slim and Martha (I believe their names were), and traveled up and out of map where he met Dutch and then decided to join them back down.

Afterwards they traveled down to Blackwater where they "hid in plain sight" right outside town as Arthur says he does not like being so close to the town, and considering how close they were to Valentine, I would guess they camped at the ledges where Charles and Javier hides when going to find Sean, either there or the other side of the town.

Blackwater Camp:

But even though they were camped so close to down, Arthur funnily enough still stayed in town from time to time. It does however not seem that they were settled there or in Big Valley for very long, as Arthur also says that they have been running more than normally those weeks.

Now we get to a bit that confuses me because suddenly the group goes from the southern part of the map down in Blackwater, to suddenly appearing up by Spider Grove by Colter, and Arthur mentions that they headed "east over the Grizzlies" so they went west from Blackwater, out of the map, and then up North only to go east again. Not to mention that it seems they did it in a fairly short time, they haven't had proper time to talk about what happened, they were still shook, Davey was not yet dead from a gut wound and Jenny was burried not far from where we first see the gang?

See that is a little confusing, but I hope that answers your question! I had a lot of fun answering it at least, rereading Arthur's journal and all.

[emeryhiro]

What are your thoughts about the whole bethyl thing? I personally saw it more as Daryl finding hope and light when he was in a place of deep despair - she showed him that there's still good to be seen in the world. And so it was a major loss to him personally when she died. Plus she helped him process part of his past trauma.

But I've seen Norman Reedus and Greg Nicotero say that while romance wasn't scripted, there was a taste of it in the air when it came to acting choices. I hate that idea bc she was a teenager and it makes me feel less good about Daryl. I guess I'd hope that if he started catching some feelings "he didn't understand" (as NR puts it), then he would see that they're too far apart in other ways for it to go beyond a father/daughter big brother/little sister sort of bond. What do you think?

Hey Anon!

Thank you for your questions 😊 I'm sorry it took me some time to respond. I just wanted to be careful with what I say and how I explain my opinion since the last thing I want to do is disregard or disrespect anyone else's opinions on the topic.

I agree with you. I always saw that the reason Daryl grew to care so much for Beth was because she gave him hope and didn't allow him to shut off from the world after he thought he'd lost everything and everyone that mattered to him. This ultimately made him feel like he owed her because she saved him, maybe not in the literal sense, but definitely mentally. Her persistence ultimately leads him to finding everyone again.

Only hours before having to be on the run with Beth, Rick had told Daryl about how he'd sent Carol away for killing Karen and David, and we saw how defeated that made Daryl feel. Realising that Carol had to shoulder that responsibility on her own and that he wasn't able to be there to stand up for her put him in a really bad place mentally.

This guilt was then compounded by the governor returning to the prison and killing Hershel infront of everyone, and the guilt that Daryl felt for giving up his search for Governor, which in his mind was the reason Hershel died and they lost the prison.

So all these things combined meant that Daryl felt responsible for EVERYTHING that had just happened TO EVERYONE. And no one was there to help him sholder that pain and responsibility.

Ultimetly his instincts kick in, all the walls that he'd slowly been breaking down come right back up, and he starts to go cold again just to numb himself from everything he's feeling.

And this is where Beth came in. Firstly, her innocence and optimism was the only thing stopping Daryl from completely shutting off from the world. She kept reminding him that the other's could have made it and that if they got out then odds are others must have as well. And secondly, she kept him busy, she was something that needed his protection and that gave him porpose and a reason to keep going.

After Beth gets taken, Daryl ends up with The Claimers, who he thinks are exactly the type of people he deserves to be around, because (in his mind) he can't seem to be capable of keeping and protecting anything good that comes his away, but by some miracle he's reunited with Rick, Carl and Michonne again, and this is where he realises that Beth was right, and if Rick and co have made it then it probably means others have as well.

I think this moment above was the beginning of Daryl starting to believe that he has value again. Rick's words begin to soften him again, but even after reuniting with almost everyone again, we don't actually see Daryl's guard come down until this moment below.

Every single shield/wall he'd been putting up until now is instantly shattered. He's completely exposed in this moment. His mind and body take a few seconds to register what his eyes are seeing and what his heart is feeling, and he's instantly running to Carol and into her arms without any other thought. This is the moment we can get a true reading of his feelings.

Regarding how he felt for Beth...

Yes, I think there may have been some confusion from Daryl's side about what he was feeling for Beth, just like how Norman has described it previously; he cared for Beth, she was nice to him, and that was so rare in his life that he misread the whole situation and couldn't interpret what he was actually feeling. In my opinion, there was no romantic feeling or intent on either side; they were both just navigating a new form of friendship that they'd never experienced before. And if I had to, I'd compare his relationship with Beth to his relationship with Lydia. To put it very simply, he felt responsible for protecting these young girls who, at the time, had no one else on their side, and ultimately, both girls saved him in return and looked up to him as a role model.

~~~~

Thanks again for the questions 🩵 I really hope I did this justice because my main goal is to keep my blog a positive place for everyone.

I know there are many varying opinions on this topic, but I'm glad I got the chance to share mine, and I just wanted to once again say that this is my opinion and not meant to invalidate anyone else's 🩵

[natsunenuko]

TW // mental issues, mental absue, harassment, surgery/blood

I'm sorry this one is so long, but please carry on reading. It's a chance for me to not only speak about the situation but let out some steam too. It is unfortunate this announcement comes at the same time the flood occurs on the south of my home country (Poland) and I'm in the endangered zone, luckily so far safe, as I feel my head can't handle more stress.

It's been so long since I've been this personal online. I realized how I didn't feel the urge to vent for 3-4 years by now which is a sign of improving mental health. But my healing is still a process, and I'm afraid it's too hard to carry this rock alone at this point. I fought my thoughts if I should do this and I think just as deeply as I write right now. Yet, I know it's better late than never and I thank deeply my friends for helping me out recently as well as in the past in my lowest. I wholeheartedly owe my life to you.

I couldn't ask for better friends. As years verified, even long lasting relationships might be nothing but a mask and I had to learn the hard way. I ended a friendship of 13 years at the time over a misunderstanding. Other person I put my trust on was nothing but a groomer with morally corrupted sexual tendencies who would take advange of a group of minors while being the only adult among them, yet acting like a person much younger than all of them and pressuring all their mental issues on children instead of seeking help. The latter, I might speak of more in detail when I'm ready.

Long time ago I tried calling out for help but back then, the intrusive thoughts won; "Others have it worse, just work harder.", "No one will give you anything for free, no one will care.", "What people will think of you?". and I would only speak about these things in a closed circle of my friends.

I tried my best in silence by not giving up on my creative passion, working restlessly for years, improving. Hoping I could reach the point I can sustain myself purely on what I make.

But the problem is not being self-sufficient. And it's not about my art...

All of my life it has been me, my momma and my granny. The other two important figures weren't there for us, by choice. (which is hard to say if losing someone you loved is worse than not being cared for in the first place) My rather young self at the time didn't put much thought about it as I didn't understand it but something always felt wrong; my only issues at the time was being "that weird, quiet kid with little to no friends". But despite the hardships, my momma has always been my hero, working without a time for a break or rest so we could live happily, to afford something special from time to time.

However in 2014 my momma has been hospitalised and almost lost her life to wrongly treated ovarian cyst (cyst rapture), with enough blood loss to require emergency surgery...

From that point on things went downhill and the result of that we feel to this very day. To stay afloat we fell into a severe dept. (We didn't have any savings, could only rely on borrowing money or loans) And since I was a child as all of this happened, I've only learned about it all throughfully as I entered adulthood, so I wouldn't need to worry about anything and "just be a kid". Which I really understand, but it doesn't make it easier to handle.

And by now, for several years I keep on trying to earn money, so I could free my momma from this chain and let her live, not survive. I always wanted to get through this quietly, because I never, ever wanted to burden anyone with my home problems. But it grew to a point I might need to grab anything to climb towards the light

The goal is $10 000... which is scarily large number.

I list all the options but Kofi is preferred to keep track of the funds!

My commissions are HERE! (the sheet will receive a slight update in upcoming days) My Kofi is HERE! (Level 4 Tea is free headshot drawing every month!) HERE's other services I do (adopts, brushes, etc) I plan to do paid requests for my friday streams on occasion! Anything else I come up with I hope to include in here! Every person who donates will be part of "Thank you" list where I hope to shoutout everybody, cause every penny matters. I want this situation to end...

[lowkeyrobin]

hiii! hope you’re having a good day/night/whatever :D i was wondering if you could do something where the reader was fives (almost ?) s/o and then after learning about him and lila theyre upset. and then reader and diego sort of bond over the feeling and find solace in their friendship with each other. i mean this in like a thing for diego sort of way, the five thing is just a backstory. sorry if this is hard to understand english is hard

oooo okay this is cool!! ; and don't worry it's not hard to understand at all! your English is very good 🫶 ; but we are gonna pretend five wasn't trapped in his teenage body for all the time reader would've known him or wtv 💀 cause the physical and mental gap between diego and five is diabolical and idk how else to make it not weird. I usually say and enforce that I won't recognize the five/lila thing as canon but this is relevant to the story and I need diego requests lol. ; but uh yeah!! thank you for requesting, I hope you enjoy!! ; also the ending part lowkey sucks I'm sorry

DIEGO HARGREEVES ; it's called moving on

summary ; after Five and Lila get trapped in the subway, they have a double affair on you and Diego. after saving the world, you both bond over it and move on (to each other)

warnings ; language, cheating, arguing / physical fighting, knives, alcohol

disclaimers ; five is in the physical body of a 30-ish year old to make this not creepy as hell on any parts. I have a distinct hatred for whatever tf happened w Lila and Five so don't expect to see anything nice about them... ; also reader is a sparrow, didn't wanna get incest-y in here...

word count ; 1.5k

masterlist

Klaus, Allison, and Luther sit on the couch, watching over the kids while you and Diego rush to the door. Five and Lila had been MIA for hours now, you were both growing worried. Luckily, it was them standing at the doorstep.

"Where've you been?" Diego asks, slightly worried. "It's been hours"

"Seven, at that" you raise an eyebrow at Five. "You've never just gone MIA for that long. Did you find anything out on how to stop all this shit? Cause we did"

Five is unable to look you in the eye. "Uh, not really. What'd you learn?"

"Well, for one, Dad's alive, so is our mother... I think?" you begin, pulling him inside. "She's not really our mom, but she's Dad's wife, or whatever. Our actual birth mother's are alive in this timeline. And your Ben died because your Reginald shot him in the head! We think fate is coming together cause my Ben and Jennifer are together and we have to stop them-"

Diego and Lila step in behind you, joining you all in the living room. Lila's family stand in the kitchen, coming together to make some Christmas dinner food for the upcoming days. You can't help but notice both Five and Lila can't look you in the eye, how they look tired and haven't spoken damn near a word.

You four stand in the middle of the living room, shoes off to Lila's family's rules, your socks digging into the carpet. Allison, Luther, and Klaus part their attention between the kids and you four.

Diego looks down at Lila's wrist, seeing a glare from the sunlight outside on something she was wearing. He quickly grabs her wrist, confused of what she could've been wearing, as she didn't like bracelets, at least not store bought ones. She wouldn't have gone on a run to get herself a bracelet, right? I mean, what?

Diego furrows his brows at her while you press a chaste kiss to Five's forehead.

"I thought you hated bracelets?" Diego mutters, grabbing the attention of the siblings who sit on the couch.

Lila looks at him with fake confusion, trying to brush it off. "No, I don't"

"Yeah, you do" Diego nods. "I got you one for Valentine's Day and you traded it in for a Dyson vacuum."

You and Five look to Diego and Lila, listening in.

Lila is silent. "I don't like store bought ones. I kept the bracelet you made for me in that mental institution"

She had him on that one.

"Who made it, then?" Diego asks firmly.

She's silent. Five looks away from Diego.

Diego looks to him, then back at Lila. He frees Lila's wrist from his grasp, staring Five down. You look between him, Diego, and Lila, connecting the dots.

"Five?" You question, eyebrows furrowed, your voice unsure.

Diego reaches for his back pocket.

Five stuffs his hands in his pockets, head held low.

"Is there something going on between you two?" Diego asks nervously, looking between Five and Lila.

"Diego-" Lila speaks

"Holy shit, wow" Diego scoffs, looking down at her.

Klaus' jaw drops, Luther and Allison beside him share shocked expressions. You look back at the three, unable to react as you're caught frozen in the moment.

"Woah"

"Holy shit"

"I didn't see that one coming"

"Holy shit, I was right" Diego looks between the two, "I knew you were cheating on me!"

You shove Five into the wall, far enough away from the TV and the kids to not effect them physically. Diego hurls a knife at him, just missing his skull by a few centimeters, a purposeful act. He merely did it to scare Five. The knife creates a hole in the wall and a loud thudding noise that catches the family's attention.

Diego turns his attention back to Lila, you looking over your shoulder to listen. "I knew you were cheating on me at that book club"

Lila sighs. "I wasn't cheating on you... not when you thought I was"

You turn back to Five, lips slightly parted, your expression soft yet heavy. He isn't able to speak a word to you. He steps away from the stabbed wall, walking toward you. He reaches for you and you push him away.

"Y/n-"

"No!" you shudder, then speak firmly. "Get away." you back away toward Diego, unable to look at him.

"Maybe we should go-" Luther speaks, seeing how the three were witnessing an awful thing right now.

"No, we're not going anywhere" Allison replies, an arm over him to prevent him from going anywhere.

Diego steps forward, looking at Five in the eye. "Five, did you s-k-r-e-w my wife?" he spells out 'screw' since a bunch of kids under thirteen sit no more than six feet away.

"Screw is spelled s-c-r-e-w" Grace chimes in with a smile, unaware of the situation because of her small little mind.

Klaus snorts, failing at holding back laughter. Allison bites her tongue while Luther deeply sighs, keeping his laughter at bay.

Five bites his lip before slowly nodding.

"What the fuck?!" you exclaim, slinging a quick punch to his face, causing his nose to bleed.

He groans, holding a hand to his nose. He doesn't rebute, knowing he deserved that and much more.

"Are you kidding me?" you question, looking between Five and Lila. "What the actual shit is wrong with you two?!"

Lila's family peers through the kitchen door, halfway understanding what you all were saying as they weren't perfectly fluent with English. You wished you could speak Punjabi to tell them how their daughter cheated and how your boyfriend was a fucking homewrecker.

"Y/n, please," Lila speaks, trying to calm you, holding a hand out to you.

You slap her hand away, and back up toward the siblings on the couch. Klaus holds a hand over his mouth, Luther watches in silence, Allison bites her tongue.

"You're fucking unbelievable."

You cut contact with Five, Diego cut most contact with Lila and kept the kids 70% of the time. Lila paid child support, the extent of their conversations other than the kids.

It'd been a few years since your brother had to be killed. You'd been struggling a lot. In between Ben's death and the whole Five and Lila thing, you weren't okay, you didn't think you ever would be.

Most the family didn't talk to either one after the whole incident. They'd luckily sided with you and Diego. Allison still talked to Lila, but she'd created herself a whole new life, so the two didn't talk that much.

Life moves on, shit happens.

You lived near Diego, the two of you often going out with the kids to still create some sort of happy family dynamic for them. From lunch to movies, to road trips and rollercoasters, you'd do anything for those kids. You felt so bad knowing there was no way to repair Diego and Lila's relationship, wishing the kids got to have more time as a proper family.

Diego sat with you on the couch, no kids in trail this time. They were with Lila this weekend. Fruity concoctions rest in your hands, the television in front of you playing some dumbass action movie.

"People clearly don't like three children on the man they're going on a date with," Diego chuckles. "My kids come first, sorry."

You smile. "At least you're humbled and know what you're living for, what's important."

He raises an eyebrow, confused about what you're implying.

You see that look and clarify. "I dunno what I'm living for anymore. My brother's dead. My ex cheated on me and all I feel is fucking angry day in and day out. I don't know anymore"

Diego's face grows soft. "Moving on isn't easy."

You nod. "It's harder to do it alone"

He's silent for a moment before speaking up. "Maybe we don't have to do it alone?"

You raise an eyebrow. "What're you implying, Di?"

He shrugs, looking into your eyes. "Whatever you want to think I'm implying"

"...but the kids, that's gonna be so confusing-"

"You love the kids. I know you do. Otherwise, you wouldn't have been on all these adventures with us, you wouldn't have asked me yourself to make plans and come over. I know you feel the way I do."

You're both quiet, thinking over your own and the other's words.

"Maybe" you shrug.

"Maybe? I'm allowed to get my hopes up?"

"Calm down, pal" you chuckle. "Not so soon, let's like... ask the kids. I'd feel bad not asking how they felt. They're my priority, they come before us"

Diego nods. "Glad you feel that way. We should get married ASAP." he chuckles, nudging you with his shoulder.

You smile, taking a sip of your beverage. "Feels wrong to even think about this, y'know?"

"It's called moving on. It's normal, I promise"

[reallychaoticwoo]

May I request a yeosang x fan reader smut. Where she goes to Seoul to go to a concert. But she meets Yeosang the day before and she freaks out like panic attack mode. So he takes her to his dorm. Has her shower and change into some of his clothes and it gets him hard and she never had experienced sex or even masturbate so she doesn't understand what she is feeling so he walks her through it all from fingerings to squirting to oral to eventually full on sex. And as they finish she notices blood and gets worried so Yeosang calms her down and such?

⛓️I really enjoyed writing this one! Im still not fully confident in my smut writing abilities, but i think this one turned out better than the last one. Hopefully, this meets your expectations🖤⛓️

✨️Sex Ed in Seoul✨️

📝Word Count: 3,820

❤️Pairing: Yeosang x reader

⚠️Warnings: MDNI 18+ ONLY!! cussing, fingering/oral (f receiving), unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it folks), squirting, inexperienced reader, experienced Yeo, panick attack, lots of smut and a sprinkle of fluff (im a sucker for a happy ending)🖤 Please lmk if I missed anything!

‼️This is purely for entertainment purposes and does not represent the idols in any way‼️

🖤Hope you enjoy!🖤

Your plane just landed, and you are rushing through the bustling airport to get your bags and find where you'll be staying for the night. Not that you haven't already booked a hotel, but you've never been to Seoul before, so you weren't really sure how to get around the city.

Grabbing your bags, you made your way out of the airport and through the busy streets. It must be obvious to everyone that you're not from here. Aside from your difference in fashion and your obviously American choice of luggage, you were looking around at your surroundings like a kid in a candy store. The locals seemed rather nice, giving you small smiles as you passed by. After about 15 minutes of mindless wondering, you made your way to a rather cozy looking coffee shop.

Sitting down with your large luggage bags next to you, you made yourself comfortable and started to Google Maps how to get to the hotel you'd be staying at. You were so ready to make it to where you'd be staying for the next few days. Wanting to unpack, shower, and set out your concert fit for tomorrow. You'd been saving up since the last tour, your heart set on making it to Seoul, and you finally had.

Having been so engrossed in your googling and your thoughts of what tomorrow would be like, you completely missed the man who just sat down next to you. He looked really familiar but you couldn't quite put your finger on it. It's not like you know anyone from here, minus the idols, which, let's be honest, you don't actually know. That's when you saw it. The distinct birthmark peaking out from under his mask, next to his eye. 'No way. There's no fucking way that's him. Do I say something? Do I ignore him and pretend like my bias isn't sitting right next to me??' Your mind was racing almost as fast as your heart.

"So, what brings you to town?" Omg, he's talking to you. You're not sure if it's fear, embarrassment, butterflies, or sheer panic, but your heart is beating so fast you could swear it's about to pound itself right out of your chest. Right now, your chest seems like it's the tightest it's ever been.

"Hey, are you okay?" He looked at you with concern written all over his face. "Uh- I- i- I'm so sorry," quickly trying to gather your things, tears starting to well in your eyes, you knocked your coffee over. Spilling all over the table, floor, and your clothes. 'No... fuck, this can't be happening right now.' The tears no longer resting in your eyes but flooding down your cheeks. Your breathing uneven and fast, your body trembling all over.

Yeosang was quick to action, notifying an employee nearby that there was a spill and apologizing for the hasty exit the two of you would be making. Grabbing your hand and your luggage, he pulled you outside and into a black car that was parked at the back of the coffee shop. Once the two of you were secure in the car, he checked to make sure you were buckled properly. He held your hand is his, pulling down his mask. "Hey, hey, take some deep breaths.. everything is okay." Barely able to comprehend what just happened, what was currently happening, you leaned forward, putting your head in between your legs, trying to steady your breathing. Rubbing small circles on your back with his free hand, his other one gently brushing your hand is his, he repeated, "Everything is okay. You're doing great, so continue to take deep breaths and let your body relax."

Not even 10 minutes later, the car had come to a stop. Extending his hand out to you, Yeosang helped you out of the vehicle, grabbing your luggage once again, before waving the driver off. You had gained some control over your breathing, but the feeling of your chest shattering inside you was still evident. Walking inside the large building in front of you, he effortlessly navigated you through the halls and to a room. The room was stunning, white walls, soft gray bedding, a few plants hanging or sitting in various spots, a small bookshelf against the wall filled with some of your favorite novels and a sleek gray desk without a single thing misplaced. It felt comfortable, like a safe haven.

"This is my room, I hope you don't mind the messy bed, I wasn't really expecting to bring someone home today," a nervous but sweet chuckle escaping him. "Uh, I figured you could use a shower as they always help calm my nerves, and I'm not really sure where you're staying, so I brought you here. I hope that's okay?" You tried to look grateful, but everything inside of you was stuck in the limbo of uncertainty. Giving your best polite smile and a nod, he continued, "Well, the bathroom is over here, I'll set some clean clothes and a towel in there for you. Please take all the time you need in there. I'll be in here when you get out." Grabbing a towel and some of his comfiest clothes, he placed them neatly on the counter before returning to the room. "All set. I'll see you whenever you're ready."

Standing under the warm water, letting it embrace your skin, you finally let your body release its tension. Your shoulders dropping and your back slouching ever so slightly. He was right. A shower is just what you need to help calm your nerves. After about an hour of regaining yourself, you finally left the warmth and comfort of the shower. Drying yourself off and putting on the clothes Yeosang left out for you, you took a look at yourself in the mirror. "You've got this. He's just a human, like any other human out there. Just be yourself and don't panic." After your whispered self pep talk, you finally made your way out of the bathroom.

Perking up as soon as he heard the handle to the bathroom door move, he asked, "Are you feeling any better?" You smiled at him, an actual smile, and oh, it was a beautiful smile. "I am. Thank you for helping me out. You really didn't have to do that." He just shook his head at you, smiling kindly. "I did, though. I couldn't just let you go through that alone." His kind smile seemed to change for a split second with a different emotion you weren't able to quite place. Trying not to read too much into it, you sat on the foot of the bed facing him. "Well, I'm grateful for your kindness." Your smile was truly breathtaking. In fact, you sitting there on his bed, in his clothes, it was mesmerizing. Like all of his daydreams had come to life before him.

He'd always imagined himself with a girl who was soft and kind. Someone who would look like a doll in his clothing, whose smile would make his world pause in an instant. With someone like you. Feeling guilty for his wondering mind, he decided to ask again, "So, I asked earlier, but I never got my answer. What are you in town for?" Blush spreading across your face, you looked down, "Funny, you should ask.. I Uh, I actually came for your concert tomorrow. I've been a fan of you all for a while now, and it's my first time being able to come out to Seoul to see you perform." A wide grin spread across his face. How did he not notice you were an atiny? He was so worried about your impending panic attack that he completely failed to remember the fact you were wearing a tour shirt. "I'm glad you were able to make it! I must know, who's your bias? Maybe I could set up a personal meet and greet for you!" Fidgeting with your thumbs, you shot him a shy smile. "Oh, there's no need for that." He was puzzled, to say the least. What atiny wouldn't want to have a one on one with their bias? "Why's that?" He needed to understand why someone would pass up that opportunity. Most fans would (and have) fight for even a minute of time with their favorite member. "Well, uh, you kind of already have. You're my bias." There was no hiding the fact that your face was the same shade as a tomato. Did you really just tell him that?  "Oh? Oh! Well, I'm glad I was the one that you ran into today then." That was it. You're literally the embodiment of what he's been dreaming of, and you like him too??

He wonders if you feel as soft as he's always imagined. What you sound like when you're being worshipped. What you'd feel like if he ever got to make you his own. His pants were tightening at the thoughts. Trying to shift his position, he leaned back further on the bed, pulling one of his legs up to try and hide his hardening length. Unluckily for him, or maybe it was lucky? You noticed that his pants seemed to have a tent that wasn't there before.

"Uh, should I, um, leave you to, uh, take care of that?" You weren't uncomfortable, but nervous? You didn't know much about sex. You were a virgin, hell, you've never even touched yourself. Yet the sight of him, even if only for a split second, sent tingles down your spine. "No, uh, I'm sorry. I'm not usually one to be so, uh, easily excited. I just, well, never mind." You cocked your head at him, your eyes questioning what he meant. Catching on to your confusion, he quickly tried to explain. "Look, I'm usually very in control of my urges, but I'd be lying if I said that you weren't something right out of my dreams. You are very gorgeous, and your smile is heart-stopping. I let my mind wonder, and I apologize for that."

He was honest. That was one of the many reasons you'd liked him so much in the first place. Aside from being painstakingly beautiful himself, he had a personality that was just as inviting as his looks. Feeling a surge of curiosity and something else you weren't really used to feeling, you decided to ask, "What do you mean you let your mind wonder? I'm sorry to ask, but I, Uh, I'm not really um.. experienced." It was his turn to look puzzled. "What do you mean by that? Not to ignore your question, but surely you have some experience?"

"No, I don't. I've never even touched myself, and I'm still a virgin. I just wanted to wait, ya know? Find someone worth giving myself to in that way.. someone who would actually love me and not just use me. I know, it's rare these days, but one can dream." You weren't really sure why you were telling him this. After tomorrow, you'd never see him again, so did it really matter? Give it a month, and he probably won't even remember. They meet so many fans with all kinds of stories.

"I understand, well, to answer your question from earlier. I couldn't help but wonder what your lips would taste like against mine. Or how pretty you sound when you moan. You must make the most magical noises when you're enjoying yourself." Your thighs clamped shut at his words. Your untouched cunt silently screaming to be loved, to be pleasured. You gulped at the thought, I mean, who better to take your virginity than someone you've literally dreamt about every night for years. Someone who you could only pray your future partner would remotely resemble. Someone who saw you, a stranger, and decided to help you when you were afraid and vulnerable.

"Yeosang... would you, um, would you be okay with taking it slow? Walking me through it?"

"I'd love nothing more. I'm gonna need you to come lay on the bed next to me, okay?"

Patting the bed next to him, you moved to lay beside him. Your nerves were getting the best of you again, but this time, it felt good? He eased his way over you, his legs straddling your thighs. Looking down at you with nothing but awe, he leaned in slowly, giving you time to move if you wanted, before softly caressing your lips with his. His hand moving up to gently cup your cheek and pull you slightly closer. Your head was already spinning. How could a kiss feel this good? He slowly moved his other hand to your breast, palming at the soft mound over your shirt. A small but angelic whimper escaping your mouth and flowing into his. You were so perfect, and all he's done is kiss you.

Parting your lips to catch his breath, he moved his way down, placing soft, calculated kisses on your jaw, then neck, the chest. Arching into his touch absentmindedly, your eyes closed in pure bliss, your hand followed his every move, finding its place in his hair, gently gripping the blonde locks in between your fingers. Kissing down your stomach, he stopped right above where his sweats sat on your waist. "Are you comfortable with taking these off, love?" He looked up at you, his eyes reassuring, full of concern for your comfort and yours only. It was obvious he wanted to make you feel good more than anything else. You nodded a quiet "Yes" escaping your lips.

With your permission, he hooked his thumbs on the waistband, pulling it and your panties down carefully. "I'm going to taste you now beautiful, okay? I need you to relax for me and let me make you feel good. Can you do that for me, precious?" Another nod from you is all he got, and all he needed. Licking a slow strip up your folds. "Fuck you're so wet already. Did you know that precious? Did you know how beautifully eager you cunt was for some attention?" Looking up at you, all he could see was the absolutely fucked out look on your face. He hadn't even fully started and you looked like you were ready to fall apart. God, you really could not be more perfect.

Placing a few more slow licks through your folds, he spread your thighs a little further apart. He wanted the perfect view of his new favorite meal. Your hands gripped the sheets beneath you, your hips bucking up, trying to find his tongue once again. "Fuck you're so eager to learn princess. Don't worry, I promise I'll teach you everything I know." And with that he was face first in your cunt again. Licking sweet circles around your clit. You felt like you were floating, your stomach creating a knot of pleasure just waiting to be released. Your hips moving with the licks he placed on your aching bud with perfect timing. Feeling like you were nearing your climax he slowly slipped his index finger inside your tight hole. "Dear god, you are so fucking tight baby, I'm not sure I'm gonna be able to fit, we're gonna have to prep this pretty pussy of yours okay?" You were nothing but a fraction of the girl you were just 10 minutes ago. Your brain foggy, your climax ready to take you under. He slipped his middle finger in, curling both fingers up to find the spongey spot he knew would set you off. Once he found it, he only slightly quickened his face, adding pressure you your clit with his tongue expertly flicking away. "Fuck... FUCK YEOSANNNGGG" Your vision went white, your thighs trembling at the feeling of your high spraying out of you. You were an absolute mess. Trying to catch your breath, you propped yourself up on your forearms. Yeosang already climbing on the bed next to you, water in hand. "Here love, take a sip." You gulped the water down, handing it back to him. "Your shirts soaked?? I'm so sorry!! I didn't mean to - i- I didn't know.." You started. He just laughed waving you off. "Of course you didn't know baby. I'm pleasantly surprised you can squirt and I am absolutely not complaining. It was hot as fuck. I'd love to make you do it again." And you would love to do it again. Having finally fully come back to and steadied your breathing you look at the blonde man sitting next to you. "Yeosang, please, I want you. I want you to have me, I want you to be my first. Please..." Fuck, how could he say no to that? He couldn't. He wouldn't. "Are you absolutely sure love? I don't want you to regret it later." He meant that too. He knew that it was important to you and he didn't want to be the guys you were so desperately trying to avoid. He wouldn't be them, he'd made up his mind. "I couldn't think of anyone else I'd rather loose my virginity to, Yeo.. you're literally my biggest fantasy.. please take me."

And with that, he was taking off his clothes, throwing them on the floor. You followed suit, taking off your.. his shirt, and tossing to the floor. He climbed back over you once again, and you spread your thighs, giving him perfect access to your glistening entrance. Leaning over you to place a gentle kiss on your forehead before resting his against it. "We'll take it slow, okay baby? If you need me to pause or to stop all together, just tell me, okay?" You smiled up at him, your eyes full of love. "Okay," you nodded. Lining himself up, he slowly pushed himself into your sopping cunt. Your lips parting at the stretch, a painful inhale falling from your mouth. "Are you okay? Do I need to stop?" You shook your head, "No, no please don't stop Sangie." A breathy plea to him. Inching himself further inside he groaned in pleasure at the feeling of your warm walls clenching around his cock like a glove. You feel like you were made for him. Molded to fit his dick, and his dick only. Stilling his movement once he was fully sheathed inside you he placed a hungry kiss to your lips. His tongue massaging yours, your beautiful moans being swallowed by him. Pulling away ever so slightly you whined looking at him with the most pitiful, gorgeous, look he's ever seen. "Sangie, please... please move."

Slowly, he retracted his hips before pushing back into you with one deep thrust. "Aahh, shit Sangie!" Another sharp thrust, "fuck you feel so good wrapped around me baby." He set the perfect pace, slow and deep thrusts, pulling you into your own personal utopia of pleasure. Your hands found their place on his shoulders, nails sinking into his skin surely leaving cresent marks he will be wearing proudly tomorrow. Your back arching in pleasure and your walls clenching around him, he quickened his pace. Sharp deep thrusts threatening to explode. "Fuck angel, are you close? I need you to cum for me beautiful, I need to feel you cum all over my cock." His eyes were pleading with yours his hand quickly moving down to where your sweet perky bud was. Applying pressure to the small mound, flicking over it in time with his trusts, your eyes glossed over, you were so far gone. "Sangie... sh...aaahhh.. I'm gonna..." the feeling washed over you with a surge that refused to hold back. Yeosangs thrusts becoming speratic as your essence floods over him like a warm wave "Quick baby, where do you want me to come??" Your mind barely had time to comprehend his words before you were saying, "inside please fuck Please cum inside me, I want to feel you everywhere." With a few more unsyncronized pumps, he was spewing thick white ropes onto your spasms walls. Steadying himself above you, he kissed you tenderly before slowly pulling out and standing up. "Let me help you get cleaned up, I'll be right back."

He disappeared into the bathroom, coming back only a few moments later with a warm washcloth. He was gentle when cleaning you up. Taking his time as to not cause you any pain or discomfort. You looked at the bed, and your body froze. "Yeo... Yeosang.. why is there blood??" Your voice and body trembling at the sight. He quickly wrapped his arms around you, pulling you to his chest. "Don't freak out, okay. It's perfectly normal. A lot of girls bleed their first time having sex, and I promise it's nothing to worry about." He reassured you. "Now, how does a bath sound?" A soft hum into his shoulder was all he needed to know that that's exactly what you needed right now. Gently laying you back down, he disappeared to the bathroom again. As he drew your bath, adding relaxing oils and bath salts, he laid out two towels and some body oil for after.

"Let's get you in the tub angel. I'll be there to join you in a few minutes, okay? I'm just gonna make the bed really quick." He helped you into the tub, one hand holding yours and his other hand resting on your back as you eased yourself in. A quick kiss to your forehead, and he was leaving to change the bedding and throw the soaked sheets in the laundry.

Once he returned, he joined you in the tub, sitting behind you with his arms wrapped around your waist. "So I was thinking.." He started, "I know we just met, and we just had sex, but I was hoping that, if you want, of course, you'd stay with me? You don't have to answer now, but I just want you to know I think you're really something special and I'd love to see what the future has in store for us." You nodded, listening to his words, deciding to answer him after you weren't naked at the very least.

He helped you bathe, and you, of course, returned the favor. Getting out of the tub, he made sure to hold you steady and wrapped you in a fluffy towel. He helped you get dressed in a new set of his clothes and even carried you to his bed. Laying you down under the covers, he climbed in bed next to you. You turned to face him, looking at him with so much admiration, so much wonder and love. "I'd love to stay with you." You said before turning to lay on your back. He pulled you back to face him, his arms tightening around your waist. He kissed the tip of your nose softly, "You dont even know how happy you just made me. You really are the woman of my dreams."

[drschnauzer]

.

[braceletofteeth]

🎶✨when u get this u have to put 5 songs u actually listen to, publish. then, send this ask/tag 10 of your favourite followers✨️🎶

tagged by @leporschespam 🥰 Thanks!! <3

(I had to go and take a look at the Most Played on my music player, then I took note from the ones I know I actually listen a lot)

Me and My Husband by Mitski

A few months ago I was taking a quiz, as you do, and, in one of those infamous song lyrics questions, there it was. That's not where I found the song, though! (it happened long before that). I'm telling you about this specific moment because, in the quiz, it was classified as a song about codependency, and when I read that I was like “Yeah. Pfff. Alright.”, you know, incredulous, but then... I started thinking about all the ships I relate to it... And, as you can imagine, I went from oh to oh very quick.

Use Me (Original ver.) by PVRIS

The new version with a rap part is good too. Not very necessary, but good.

PVRIS is one of those rare bands I vibe with many songs, instead of just few and far in between.

I ALSO REALLY WANT TO EDIT VEGASPETE WITH THIS ONE BUT I NEVER GET AROUND TO DO IT 😭

Sad Girl by Lana del Rey

I used to think the lyrics said 'He's got the fire, and he talks with flames'. It sounded really cool in my head.

Choreomania (Live At Madison Square Gardens) by Florence + The Machine

The studio version is ok BUT THE LIVE VERSION IS EVERYTHING. I love dancing and being dramatic to the sound of Florence songs.

Also, I was today years old when I finally learned how to spell the title of this one (and what it actually means) 🤡

Baby Came Home by The Neighbourhood

What I like the most about this song is that it's tranquil, relaxed; beach vibes, even. Till you get to the bridge, and then you can't help but scream at the top of your lungs.

That's also a Moonjo/Jongwoo song!! I go completely feral every time someone edits them with it.

+ Bonus! New song I've had on repeat lately:

Bells in Santa Fe by Halsey

The first time I heard it was in the new season of YOU, but back then I didn't care enough to go looking for it myself. However, everything worked out just fine, because a week later I found it again—in the playlist of a KinnPorsche fic, of all things.

The reason why I'm listening to it so much at the moment is, Idk, maybe because I'm under stress, and the chorus feels like a daily affirmation/mantra thing...?

Halsey: All of this is temporary.

Me: Yeah I sure fucking hope so lol

—

I'm supposed to tag 10 of my favorite followers, so, let me see... I'll tag some blogs I see in my notes often, but I may not have interacted with directly yet:

@arson-is-lit @wholesometoad34 @notsocharmy @anamaycrystal @technicallyausername @phant0m-l0rd @knifeyrat @thealmightyawesomegay-blog @blue-ladoo @mayablackwolf

I haven't spoken to most of you before. I don't know if you like games, or to be tagged in said games, and, to be honest, one by one, I feel like this invitation will most likely be politely refused, for one reason or another. Doesn't matter. I may never know what kind of music you're into, but I know about other stuff that you like. And you know about stuff that I like, too.

Both to know and to be known feel nice, and good enough. Thank you for being around. 💚

[xcziel]

i just randomly had the realization (while doing some mending, as you do) that one of the reasons jimin is my bias is because his unique voice shares qualities with the singer of my og favorite "boyband", simon lebon

they both possess that vocal "sob" and a slightly nasalized "growl" in the lower register - if you listen to say, Take the Dice (or anything off Seven and the Ragged Tiger) and then listen to Face Off you'll get an idea of what i mean

they are not at all alike otherwise - simon's voice is often strident and anthemic, not really ever delicate or breathy the way jimin sometimes is

but the jimin growls and low notes from early days bts aren't so far off - sparking off a recent discussion i saw somewhere: i think in his heyday simon *could* have covered Lie the way few might be able to

[aceparagon]

tag dump part 2 ( out of character tags )

☆ SELF-PROMOTION → you are a beacon of hope to so many that you meet. the burden is great; yet you remain strong. ☆ HEADCANONS → these are layers to you; to your heart. let others see who you are within; let your walls down for now. ☆ META → classified information on the world and the force that declared war on the Earth. ☆ PROMOTIONS → these are my dearest friends! you all mean so much to me & help me keep going despite the insurmountable odds. ☆ A LITTLE PLACE CALLED HOME → these facets help run the city of neo-tokyo and the world overall. ☆ MEMES → downtime games for when there's a lull in this hero's busy life! ✫ MUSIC → what empowers her to fight — to keep going on despite the surmounting odds. watch her dance like a star. ☆ OUT OF UNIFORM → downtime is necessary even for a hero tasked with so much; remember to take a break for yourself. ☆ STARTER CALL → you've got a message! what does it say? ☆ DASH GAMES → what's new on the 'net? ☆ QUEUE → ''sorry I can't answer your call right now! I'm off saving the world!'' ☆ DASHBOARD COMMENTARY → even if her duty has her out on the frontlines; may these messages remind you that she is with you. ☆ PSA → hey listen! this is some important stuff here! ☆ OPEN → as a new day comes; there will always be something new to look forward to.

[creature-wizard]

Okay y'all, going forward, this is what we're doing.

Shit's scary, I know. But we absolutely cannot afford to surrender to that fear, because that benefits the GOP. They want us to feel powerless, because they know we are not powerless. That's why they have so many shills and bots discouraging people from voting.

We will not demoralize ourselves and each other by doomposting in our moments of panic. If we have a panic attack, that's okay. But we are not going to spread that fear to other people in public. We will save our most scared thoughts for our private journals and close friends. And we will support our friends who are feeling hopeless.

We will remember that spreading awareness of Project 2025 and Agenda 47 has been hurting Trump. And we will continue to do this.

We will remember that right now, our only option is Biden, because without ranked choice voting, getting a third party candidate in is simply impossible. We might not like it, but that's why we're going to push like hell for ranked choice voting once we get his pruny old ass in to office for a second term. (And thank God, he can't have more than a second term; the Democrats will have to find someone else afterward.)

We will not spread conspiracy theories. Conspiracy theories are the weapon of the enemy. We don't need them.

We will not publicly mock Trump in all of this. Making Republicans feel even more victimized is a losing strategy. "But it's my blog-" I'm sorry, are you playing for political keeps or are you just here to fuck around and put everyone's life in even more danger?

We will emphasize the ways that Project 2025/Agenda 47 will hurt everyone. And we will keep talking about it.

We will remember that the UK and France have already avoided far right takeovers in their elections.

All right? You got that? Because we got this if we stick together and keep at this. Shit's bad right now but that doesn't mean it has to be bad forever. We got each other, and we can do this.

[aceparagonings]

tag dump part 2 ( out of character tags )

☆ SELF-PROMOTION → you are a beacon of hope to so many that you meet. the burden is great; yet you remain strong. ☆ HEADCANONS → these are layers to you; to your heart. let others see who you are within; let your walls down for now. ☆ META → classified information on the world and the force that declared war on the Earth. ☆ PROMOTIONS → these are my dearest friends! you all mean so much to me & help me keep going despite the insurmountable odds. ☆ A LITTLE PLACE CALLED HOME → these facets help run the city of neo-tokyo and the world overall. ☆ MEMES → downtime games for when there's a lull in this hero's busy life! ✫ MUSIC → what empowers her to fight — to keep going on despite the surmounting odds. watch her dance like a star. ☆ OUT OF UNIFORM → downtime is necessary even for a hero tasked with so much; remember to take a break for yourself. ☆ STARTER CALL → you've got a message! what does it say? ☆ DASH GAMES → what's new on the 'net? ☆ QUEUE → ''sorry I can't answer your call right now! I'm off saving the world!'' ☆ DASHBOARD COMMENTARY → even if her duty has her out on the frontlines; may these messages remind you that she is with you. ☆ PSA → hey listen! this is some important stuff here! ☆ OPEN → as a new day comes; there will always be something new to look forward to.

[ariaste]

listen ok so i made some good jokes yesterday about Lestat having an onlyfans but i am back today with a new essay and this one is entitled

Why The Invention Of Social Media Is Going to Permanently Save Loustat's Fucking Marriage

come on this journey with me.

ok so on one hand we have Louis, who does not like to leave the house except when he absolutely fucking has to and even then he resents it. my man wants to be at home with a book 100% of the time and he's so fucking valid for that. When he leaves the house, bad things happen to him. He has learned this and honestly i can't fault his evidence. it sucks out there. it truly incredibly sucks out there.

the problem is that sometimes he is married to lestat, who starts clawing at the walls if people aren't paying attention to him for 12 consecutive seconds, and being Out Of The House is the best place for him to go foraging for People To Pay Attention To Him. my man once had a rock star career the way that some people get addicted to meth brewed in a trashcan in someone's garage. Louis, through no fault of his own, is simply not capable of filling this psychological need no matter how hard he tries, except he should not even HAVE to try like that, because no one can do it, because Lestat is fucked up and like wasn't hugged enough as a child or something

this imbalance in their relationship is the core source of all their marital problems since day 1: THIS man's idea of a good time is chilling on the sofa in silence and maybe staring contemplatively at the wall for a while, and THIS man starts self-destructing at a truly astonishing rate if no one is making eye contact with him. If you make Louis go outside and socialize with people, he's miserable and sulking and whining about "are we done can we go home". If you make Lestat sit in silence in a chair for five minutes he starts crying and claiming that No One Has Ever Loved Him, Ever, Ever, And No One Understands Him, And He Hates Everyone In This House and He Is Being Actively Neglected And Cruelly Mistreated Right Now And No One Even Bothers To Feel Sorry For Him, This Is BASICALLY Domestic Violence Against Him Personally, If Only Anyone Knew About The Quiet Hidden Tragedies Of An Unhappy Marriage, and then he breaks some furniture and a window and isn't seen again for six weeks and comes back like "you will not believe what just happened, i [checks notes] met Merlin and also a dragon who gave me three wishes, brb i'm going to write another book about it :))))"

all you fucking have to do to fix their problems is to hand Lestat a cellphone and say the words "do you know about social media? you can say whatever shit you want and there's always someone awake in some time zone to talk to you." Suddenly Lestat is now very interested in sitting quietly on the couch, Lounging Alluringly and posting thirst traps on instagram and finally getting emotional fulfillment from all the likes and comments of "omg???? omg this is the hottest man alive". he does not have to leave the house anymore to get his attention meth. His yawning abyss of neediness is being fulfilled by having parasocial relationships with millions of strangers online who all think he's sexy and don't have to experience how fucking awful he is up close. he can flirt pointlessly with 200 people at once which is FINALLY ENOUGH FLIRTATIONS FOR HIM TO SATISFACTORILY JUGGLE

Meanwhile Louis is 3 feet away, vaguely reflecting to himself that HE is feeling all emotionally fulfilled because they're spending this great Quality Time together in perfect silence while he reads his book and Lestat plays on his cellular telephone and only OCCASIONALLY giggles to himself or says "louis which of these photos do you think is sexier, the one with four buttons undone or the one with five buttons undone" Louis is feeling like his Opinion is being Valued, Louis feels like he is being Consulted on Matters that are Important To Lestat. He has opinions about the photographs. It is not that much trouble to be interrupted from staring philosophically at the wall to spend five seconds looking at a photograph and then saying "that one". Finally he is experiencing Cozy Domesticity. he is so horny about it. lestat is surprised and bewildered about the sudden sharp increase in the amount of sex he is now getting but before he can make any vaguely mean comments about it (bc he's confused and vaguely defensive and worried that it's going to stop out of nowhere and he doesn't know any other interpersonal skills for expressing a thought) his phone pings about how he's just broken 5 million followers on instagram and he totally forgets to even mention the sex thing, which means that he continues getting the sex instead of inciting an argument about the sex and going through his 800th divorce from Louis

all their friends are extremely confused when a whole month, and then six months, and then a year goes by without another Loud Divorce happening and no one crashing through their front door like "I HAVE TO SLEEP IN YOUR GUEST COFFIN FOR THE NEXT MONTH, HE IS INTOLERABLE". They are worried. they are concerned. what is going on over there. are they both dead. no, they can't both be dead, Lestat just posted another tiktok of him sucking on his own fingers, which he would not be doing if Louis were dead. there is an ecosystem collapse happening in the groupchat and it's because the main Drama Vectors have been neutralized

[shoyudon]

𝐃𝐎𝐄𝐒𝐍'𝐓 𝐌𝐀𝐓𝐓𝐄𝐑, 𝐈 𝐋𝐄𝐅𝐓 .ᐟ

them forgetting a date night.

starring. gojo, sukuna, toji x fem! reader

heads up. cursing, no fluff, sukuna can use a phone (bcs u taught him lol /j), sukuna calling u "woman"

note. haiii, how are you guys doing? make sure to take care of yourself!! i'm feeling a bit angsty today, so i'm gonna write a bit of angst. i miss gojo, like so much u guys :( i might make a part two for this btw hehe

──────〃★ 𝐆𝐎𝐉𝐎 𝐒𝐀𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐔

the one thing you hated more than people being late was people who don't keep their promises — your boyfriend wasn't an exception to it. gojo's a busy man, you get it. for months you haven't been able to see him because he was so caught up in the jujutsu world; he saves people dan and night from lingering curses that it broke you a bit.

the jujutsu world treats him like a weapon; and you never liked it. despite your constant battering on him, trying to get him to quit and just settled in for a quiet life, he tells you that he can't. that people needed him, and you felt selfish.

but isn't it fine to be selfish sometimes?

clutching onto your phone, you'd tried dialing gojo's number at least six times before he answers. his voice groggy and slow, as if he had just woken up from a deep sleep, "huh . . . hello?"

you wanted to yell at him, especially because he was the one who has been reminding you about this particular date night — and he was the one to forget about it, "good sleep?" you ended up asking him, voice hard.

"y/n . . . why did you—"

"why did i call? oh, i don't know. maybe because my boyfriend stood me up for an hour and a half. i look like an idiot sitting here, satoru," you mutter out in embarrassment, avoiding the lingering gazes from both waiters and waitresses around you.

for the past hour, you've lost count of how many times you'd ask them to refill your glass of tea — embarrassing. then telling them you were waiting for someone when they tried to ask you if you were going to order anything since there were people waiting for a table, just for the said person not showing up.

"what time is— oh, fuck. baby, i'm so sorry, i fell asleep when i was work—"

before he could finish his words, you finished it for him, "working. i get it, you're always working. clearly, you don't have time for anything else, right?" you ask him, signaling the waiter nearby for the bill.

"baby, i know. i'm so sorry, i'm on my way, okay? please," he whispers. you could hear a few shuffling on the background; along with a few curses he muttered under his breath as he stumble over his feet, mind hazy from all the sudden movements he was doing despite just waking up.

"no need. i'm leaving the place," you mutter, walking out of the restaurant — heels clacking on the pavement, "and 'm leaving you, because clearly you're not ready for a relationship, so bye."

gojo yells out, "what? no, baby. i swear — i'll make it up to you, please. don't leave me . . ." he rambled on the same words over and over again, "where are you? i'm picking you up. please, can we talk about this? i'm sorry, i know i should've—"

"bye, satoru," and with that you ended the call.

──────〃★ 𝐒𝐔𝐊𝐔𝐍𝐀 𝐑𝐘𝐎𝐌𝐄𝐍

you fiddled the hem of your dress as you sat inside the almost closed restaurant, the last speck of hope you had on your boyfriend —sukuna— dissipating into hopelessness. standing up you walked over to the cashier, taking out your card to pay for the one glass of shrimp cocktail and one glass of white wine.

the cashier shot you a sympathetic look, and you didn't dare to look her into her eyes. face hard from embarrassment and shame, "thank you for coming, come again next time, ma'am . . ." she bids you goodbye as she returns your card.

walking out of the restaurant that now had the 'closed' sign flipped made your stomach churn in mixed feelings: anger, embarrassment, shame, sadness, everything all at once.

sinking your nails onto the palm of your hand, you muttered out strings of curses. you knew being in a relationship with someone who had no understanding to the concept of love was a hard thing — but honestly, you thought you got a hang of it. all this time you had been nothing but patient with sukuna, but maybe even that wasn't enough for him.

three hours. you sat alone inside the restaurant you booked for the both of you for three hours — each hour depleting your hope even more. and sukuna just managed to fuck it up even after he said he'd try. well, you should've underlined the keyword there: he said he'd try not that he'd come.

maybe you saw it coming yet it still disappointed you anyways.

your phone rang. even before you see who it was — you knew it's none other than sukuna. your heart screamed at you to answer his phone call, but your mind told you to leave it ringing because you were in no mood to talk to him. yet, at the end — you still pressed the answer button.

"what?"

"where are you?" his rough voice echoed through the line as you walked down the nearly empty street, holding onto your purse, "place's closed."

scoffing, you answered, "'f course it's closed, it's almost ten. i've been waiting for three hours, ryo. three hours."

you could hear him inhale sharply, "i was caught up with something, woman. where are you now?" he questioned. hearing a few car honking behind on the background, "where are you? answer me."

"doesn't matter, i left. and i'm leaving you, i was wrong thinking maybe i could've changed you — turns out, i couldn't. good luck to you," you mutter out sternly.

sukuna raised a brow, "y're kidding."

you weren't, and all he could hear next was the loud dial tune of the other line hanging up — now did he realize that this was all serious and you were actually leaving him for good.

──────〃★ 𝐓𝐎𝐉𝐈 𝐅𝐔𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐆𝐔𝐑𝐎

you sighed, dialing toji for the first time of the night when he said that he was going to pick you up for a date, the phone rung for a while before going into voicemail. grumbling under your breath, you tried dialing him again for the second time, which ended up the same way.

all these time spent on makeup and picking out the best outfit — all for nothing as your boyfriend, toji failed to show up on time. angry, you tried calling him again for the third time, only for it to end up in voicemail yet again. this time you decided to leave a message for him.

"hey, you forgot. didn't you? hope you're happy with yourself, cause 'm not."

dating toji wasn't the easiest — but you love him, no matter what he was like. and it was stupid of you to do so, all this time you've defended his name against your friends' malice towards him, saying how he wasn't treating you well enough and that you deserved so much better.

despite all that, you love him. disregarding their words, retorting back to how toji treats you well, which he does — except for the times he tended to forget about everything, even you. maybe it was time to open your eyes and actually break up; because you did deserve better than this.

it would be a shame to let all this makeup go to waste, and so you hailed a cab and decided to go out for a treat. and made the best out of everything, that is until toji decided it would be the most convenient time to call you back amidst your little "me time".

wiping your hand on the napkin, you answered him, "huh, you're alive," you muttered out, huffing.

he sighs, "i forgot, sorry." you couldn't see him, but toji actually looked remorseful, already on his way out of his apartment to yours, "i'm on my way."

you chuckled, "doesn't matter. i left my house," you informed, taking a bite out of the crab meat, "so don't bother coming — and i don't think i don't deserve this kind of treatment from anyone, even you, toji. i'm breaking up with you because clearly you don't take this relationship as seriously as i am."

toji furrowed his brows, "i forgot, i fucked up, i can make it up. where are you right now?" he asks, his voice still as calm as cucumber. but the look on his face contradicted the tone of his voice.

"bye, toji. good luck."

© shoyudon 2024 . no copying or reposting allowed !

[yawnderu]

Situationship!Ghost seeing you cry for the first time while having sex save me...... save me Situationship!Ghost seeing you cry for the first time while having sex

His hips halt the moment he sees you're not fully into it, the same eyes that used to look up at him with raw admiration are now distantly looking at the ceiling with a familiar gloss in them, your moans timed and fake. He slowly pulls out of you, pulling the blanket over your naked bodies, yet keeping his distance.

''What is it?'' He asks with a small sigh, eyebrows furrowed in confusion as to why you even initiated things if you're not even into it.

''I'm sorry— I can't do this.'' Your attempts to get up are interrupted by Simon pulling you back into bed, one hand gently grasping your jaw to make sure you're looking directly at him even when your vision gets blurry and the dam finally breaks. Cruel bastard he is, wanting to see you cry.

The sound of your sobs rips into his heart without hesitation. There isn't another sound he hates more. You should be laughing, the giggles that secretly make him so happy should be coming out of you rather than these loud sobs. He knows you're in pain— he knows he's the one who caused it, and he can't forgive himself for hurting someone he loves so much, even when he hasn't come to terms with it.

His arms wrap around your body, one of his warm hands running up and down your back and squeezing you tightly against his body, feeling the mix of warm tears and snot wet his bare chest. It breaks his heart to feel the way you cling to him in a state of such brokenness, the way you trust him so much despite all his failures and mistakes.

'''M sorry, angel. I'm so sorry.'' He whispers right into your ear, his apologies only for you to hear as he rocks you from side to side, gently wiping the tears from your eyes with the palm of his hand. He doesn't have any other words for you, only the silent reassurance that you'll always be safe in his arms.