#I'm sick and exhausted

[elialys]

WE’RE GETTING THE NEWSREADER SEASON 3 DATE TOMORROW AND A TRAILER ON FRIDAY HELENDALE NATION RISE UUUUPPP!!!!

^ me about all of this

[a-leg-without-fear]

Poison🩸🌧️

got the feels and wanted to write about it

Ship: Old!Logan Howlett x Mutant!Fem!Reader 🩸

Rating: 13+

Wordcount: 786

Warnings: disease, injury, blood, aging, kind of age gap? (they're roughly the same age but reader doesn't show it), grief

Your nose scrunched as it was hit by the all-too familiar scent that followed Logan like a shadow. Acrid, sharp, deadly. Seeped into his blood from his metallic bones, poisoning him. Killing him. Leeching his life and healing mutation to where he was a husk of the X-Man he once was.

It was 29 years to the day since you’d met him. When he'd woken up, terrified, on that chrome stretcher and nearly choked you to death. The blood flowing through his thick arms pumping by your ears and only proving what you’d hypothesized: his blood wasn’t normal.

Logan’s blood ran thicker than every other person’s. Tasted more metallic, more iron in his blood than the rest of the mutants that filled Charles Xavier’s mansion. You had always found Logan’s blood to be tricky to manipulate. Whether it be to stimulate his healing or to form the thick ichor to your desire, it just didn’t want to cooperate.

That same difficulty faced you now as you kneeled in front of your and Logan’s shared bed. The room rattled as another freight train barreled by outside. Dusty picture frames swinging on rusted walls, bottles of medication bouncing on wire shelves, creaking bed groaning under Logan’s weight.

You held a clean rag to a shotgun blast in Logan’s gut. His blood had soaked through two others just like it, now lying in the dented bucket at your feet. A vein in your neck strained as you focused on healing the wound.

“It’s no use, doll. I’ll be fine,” Logan grunted. He tried to wave you off with a withered hand. You smacked it away from your face. A low hum rumbled his chest.

“Shut up, old man,” you said. That earned a rough chuckle from his chapped lips. You glanced up at him from where you knelt between his knees.

If pure reverence was an expression, what painted Logan’s face in broad strokes fit the bill. Crows feet bunched around his hazel eyes, smile lines deepend by his close-lipped smirk, graying eyebrows turned up at the edges. He ran a calloused hand along your unaged cheek.

“Beautiful as the day I met you,” he whispered softly. Grief struck you in the chest like a wooden stake. 

It wasn’t fair. Logan’s adamantium skeleton sucked the life from him, making him age and decay, while you remained the same. Wrinkle-less, youthful, bright-eyed. You would pump your youth into him if you could. 

But you couldn’t.

All you could do was prevent the inevitable. Prevent what once seemed impossible, yet hung over you like a thick fog.

Logan ran his thumb under your eye, collecting a tear that spilled from your clouded eyes. You blinked up at him as a thick lump formed in your throat. Words unspoken passed between the two of you. Adoration, understanding, sorrow. Leaking from the hot tears spilling from your eyes and into Logan’s leathery skin. 

“I love you,” you breathed into his palm. You gave it one last attempt, healing the wound in his stomach. You could just barely feel the edges closing and the skin knitting together. The ligaments running through your neck and shoulder tensed under the effort.

“Love you too, doll,” he replied, using the hand not on your cheek to smooth down your strained muscles. Thinning fingers ran down your shoulder, passing over his borrowed flannel and your bare skin, then wrapped around the hand held to his gut. He laced the digits with yours, “Give it up. I’ll heal the old-fashioned way.”

A sigh rattled your lungs, anguish pooling in your chest like an oil spill. You let Logan drag your hand away from his stomach and to his face. Your crimson-stained fingers traced along the tough skin of his jaw.

“Always taking care of me,” he mumbled. Kind eyes ran across your pained expression. 

He tucked his fingers under your chin and brought your mouth to his. Plump, full lips met chapped skin. You poured your devotion into the kiss, licking into Logan’s mouth and clutching at his white tank top. His fingers dug in your silken hair.

It wasn’t perfect. It never was, when it came to Logan. Nearly thirty years of being together had taught you that fact. He was messy, rude, rough around the edges. Not to mention metal-clawed and built like a fridge.

And yet, despite it all, he was yours. You woke up next to him every morning, went to bed with him every night, much like you’d done ever since you met. Your lives were so intertwined it was hard to tell where you stopped and he began.

You knew, decades after Logan was gone, you’d treasure your intimate connection like nothing else.

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[expelliarmus]

[youchangedmedestiel]

Destiel AU idea (again)

Dean is searching for a flat because he recently divorced Lisa. He wants one that is big and comfortable enough to welcome his children, Ben and Emma. It's been months since he started searching for one. Fortunately, Lisa is understanding enough to let him stay in their old house until he finds something.

They actually aren't in a hard and conflicted relationship right now, their marriage stopped because there wasn't love between them anymore. They still care about each other.

Dean knew he wasn't in love with Lisa anymore and he suspected the same for Lisa, but he was fine with it. Lisa though thought otherwise. She asked for divorce because she said that they both deserved to find love and be loved.

So, Dean is doing his umpteenth visit for a flat that he spotted on Internet. This one seems really nice and clean, his children will be able to have their own rooms. And the kitchen looks awesome with enough place for him to cook.

The real estate agent who give him the tour of the flat isn't bad either. He has blue eyes, which looks surreal, long and dark eyelashes that match his hair and his growing beard. Dean listens to him attentively and can't help but look right into his eyes when he speaks. Dean wants to confide in him and he does that naturally actually.

He tells him that he is sick to search for a home for his family. It's been months, and he's exhausted to be disappointed each time he thinks he found something. But at the same time, he wants his children to feel good in that new home so he is demanding.

That real estate agent, Castiel, is compassionate and doesn't understand why Dean doesn't find one with his solid, complete application. Castiel tells Dean that maybe it's because others real estate agents are struggling right now. There's a lot of people searching for a new home at this time of the year, so a lot of work. Castiel admits that he, himself, is buried in work all day long.

He works 6 days a week constantly. Since Dean is really attentive to what the man in front of him says, he notices that Castiel doesn't seem to have someone in his life to get back to. So, he goes for it. He asks Castiel if he wants to go and get a drink with him once they have finished the tour.

Castiel seems surprised by the offer and looks away. He fumbles with his pen and papers and puts them on the kitchen counter. He takes a deep breath. So, Dean fears his answer.

"Are you asking me on a d-" Castiel starts asking hesitantly.

"Yes." Dean cuts him, because he somehow fears that word. It sounds too official and he's still living with his ex. Plus, it's been a while for him.

"O - okay. Yeah." Castiel agrees, and neither of them is able to look at the other.

[imekitty]

Tomorrow. I will update Disillusioned tomorrow.

[r1poutmygvtz]

don't you just love going from being so angry you're breaking and punching things, to being so upset you genuinely consider killing yourself, to being so happy you're giggling and smiling uncontrollably at every little thing, just to end up becoming completely apathetic towards everything all within 30 minutes of each other?? /s 😻

[captainjonnitkessler]

You know a lot of American anti-atheist sentiment derives directly from atheist organizations fighting Christian hegemony, right? Like the number one reason atheists are stereotyped as “angry evangelical atheists” isn’t because some people are annoying on reddit, it’s because atheists and atheist organizations are constantly suing cities and schools and companies to get them to stop shoving their religion in everyone’s face and people fucking hate us for it.

You would not believe how hard atheists have to fight to get city councils to stop opening meetings with Christian prayer, to stop high school sports events and graduations from including Christian imagery, to stop companies from coercing their employees into Christian prayers, to get towns to remove crosses from their town crests, to get government buildings and courthouses to take down their Christian monuments. Atheists have been fighting this fight constantly for decades.

And the reaction is always, always, incredibly vitriolic hatred and death threats from every conceivable quarter, including otherwise progressive and liberal people. I’ve seen high school students called “evil” by their own state senators for trying to get prayer removed from their public school. I’ve seen city council members get death and rape threats for giving humanist invocations in place of prayer. It is always framed as “those angry atheists trying to force their atheism on everyone else”. It is always framed as “overly sensitive atheists getting angry if anyone even mentions religion”. It is always framed as “atheists who can’t just let people live their lives”.

If atheists are vocal about fighting religious hegemony, then we’re angry bitter militant evangelical atheists. If we’re not, we’re cultural Christians who are supporting Christian hegemony. It can’t be both, so which is it?

[cementcornfield]

emotional sentimental little rant below the cut! i've got a bad cold and a lot of feelings on this friday night lmao

but okay i just want to say how it's been really really nice these last few months seeing so many new joe'marr/bengals blogs pop up and actively post and share stuff! i log on after work and i'm so used to being like 'oh i've gotta clip this interview or this game moment etc etc) and then i get on and see that other people have already done it! and they're getting shared and people are talking in the tags about how they're feeling about these wonderful boys and it matches what i'm thinking and feeling! there's fan art and fan vids and edits! there's over 50 (fifty!!!!) fics on ao3 now! (i remember when there were just 2!!!)

and it's just so lovely to see. how this little community has grown over the years. i can't help thinking back to when it was just me and nacs. and how we'd talk about these boys all the time. and how sad we were that no one else seemed to care. sure, there would always be joe posting, and don't get me wrong, i love him. but there's so much MORE to talk about! so many more stories and narratives to tell besides joe being hot (lmao). and finally it's happening! and i know nacs would be thrilled. i still go back and re-read old conversations and we'd get so excited talking about crazy joe'marr moments or tee being adorable or yoshi being ridiculous. and now that stuff is all over my dash with all kinds of people contributing their thoughts. and i love it i love it. i wish he were here to see this 💔

so yeah, i guess i just wanna say thank you to everyone who's been contributing lately! the newer people and of course my few beloved mutuals who have been there with me from almost the beginning. i spend way too much time on here but i enjoy it (most of it at least lmao) because of all of you <3

[lesbianphan]

when did phil say he was sick during the antwerp show ? :(

It wasn't antwerp! I've read reports from people who went to Warsaw yesterday who said he was a little off and that someone from production even gave him a water at some point and Dan was picking up the slack and like checking on him a lot during the second half of the show. Which is fully understandable, considering they've done three nights in a row and we gotta remember that besides being out of practice of doing stage shows, Phil's health isn't what it used to be, and as much as he likes to tell us he's doing fine, he's just recovered from something life threatening, yk? Besides, he's a chronically ill girly, I know the feeling.... and he has a cracked rib??? like SHIT man, that's some insane perseverance on his part, and I suspect it's mostly cause he doesn't want us to be disappointed.

I do wish (maybe a little selfishly for my own piece of mind) that they rethink/shorten the stunts on this show a little as time goes on.... I mean I'm sure they know what they're doing and they prepared for it, I just worry a little is all, cause these idiots came up with a crazy schedule and it's like... yes you wanna make us happy but at some point you'll run out of steam!

I don't want this to come off as infantilizing cause I know it irks people (it irks me too!) like I know they're both adults and make their own choices, it's just stressful to watch and I've seen them stretch themselves too thin every tour and start looking like zombies and I don't think it's at all necessary to have that much physical stuff when they're not getting any younger

[ilovedthestars]

i have. too many things to do.

[leeblissy]

hi I'm home sick with covid, am probably not getting paid for my time off, and have had to order quite a bit of food cuz I don't feel well enough to make anything o/-< it's getting very expensive very fast and I don't have much money left, plus the money im losing out on from not working is gonna fucking suck.

I can't draw anything rn cuz my apple pencil doesn't work and I'm just so so exhausted anyway but here's my kofi and my v*nmo is herecomeslee if you wanna help a guy out

[dollsome-does-tumblr]

my mom's dog got prescribed a nsaid recently and she's had a really bad stomach reaction to it over the past 24 hours and i'm super worried she's gonna die 😢😢😢 i'm so upsetttttttt. i hate this! i hate it a lot!

[graveyarrdshift]

the sexual tension between me and relapse

[sergle]

I've been on a daytime schedule for the past few days out of necessity, rehoming the kitties and everything, and it's making me physically nauseous

[sherlock-is-ace]

fandom will see the most interesting deep and nuanced character and reduce their entire plot and portrayal to "slutty sexy slut needs to get railed" and it's honestly so tiring

[chronicillnessfromateensmind]

i hate being envious of people for having normal life’s. for not being consumed by doctors appointments and test results. it’s not their fault somethings wrong with me. but i find myself placing anger and grief towards them anyways. how do you let yourself grieve what could’ve been, when you watch those around you achieve everything you ever wanted?