#I'm reading Elektra
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Clytemnestra's grief and rage as she performs funeral rites for Iphigenia are so good and remind me a lot of what I like best about the portrayals of grief in Greek epics
#please feel free to ignore this#I'm reading Elektra#The way she can't believe Iphigenia will have to navigate the underworld alone when Clytemnestra has always walked ahead#making sure the path is safe for her daughter#vs. her realization that if she dies she can't get revenge so she'll have to send Agamemnon after her instead
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The thing about Chip Zdarsky's daredevil run is that it takes inspiration from the Netflix show and forces that into the comic continuity, but it doesn't even lean into the elements I personally love about Netflix Matt?
He's not perfect, but NMCU Matt at his best is shown to be deeply compassionate and has such a rather warm demeanour to him. When he's happy (especially in college-aged flashbacks) he's really expressive. Women like him because he comes across as thoughtful, rather than being a womaniser. And there's no question as to whether he loves Elektra or not, considering he spends most of the Defenders trying to get through to her.
Not to mention that his Catholicism is deeply personal and certainly not devout. He's a person who grew up around religion and is uniquely attuned to the suffering around him, trying to work out his place in being a man of the people.
None of these traits are inherently better than 616 comic Matt, or even drastically different (although I do think they're fundamentally different characters who I like for different reasons).
But I guess my point is that... it feels like Zdarsky's Matt is based mostly off the "he's an emo Catholic who dresses like a devil to let out his anger and also sleeps with loads of women" jokes based on people's perceptions of Netflix Matt, without adapting a lot of the likeability and nuance that made me like him in the first place.
#daredevil#daredevil comics#anti chip zdarsky#matt murdock#I don't think I've ever really 616 ranted on here mostly because I'm more of a murderdock blog LOL#but like... idk I felt like throwing out my take???#because I genuinely do love Daredevil comics AND the Daredevil Netflix show#which is absolutely flawed and isn't a 1:1 adaptation#but I don't necessarily need an adaptation to be 1:1 when it's good#BUT what bugs me more is the misconceptions that an adaptation can bring#especially when those misconceptions seep their way into the source material#so people are right when they say zdarsky's run is made with the netflix show in mind (particularly his awful treatment of elektra)#but the irony is that zdarsky's matt is just... not netflix matt#so no it doesn't appeal to me#in fact it makes me madder#personally I much prefer when 616 matt is drastically different to his netflix counterpart#I'm done now but byeeee I love you if you read this
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Here's how to fix Frank Punisher.
First, retcon whatever happened in Punisher 2022. Say it was all a dream and Frank passed the test or whatever by not giving into the Beast at the very end, thereby defeating it. Or the Beast was possessing him the whole time, so none of that was really him, and also Maria was not like really Maria or whatever. I don't care, it's bad, it completely undermines everything that makes Frank as a character, and it needs to go.
So. At the end of Punisher 2022, he's in some hell dimension called 'Weirdworld'. That's fine, that can stay. This is the only good content in the entire run besides Frank's obligatory homoerotic moments with Daredevil.
Frank should get forcibly adopted by wandering children and accidentally catapulted into Dad Mode™ between unimaginable bouts of violence. This is probably the only time that run got him right.
Now, to bring Frank back. He needs a new Microchip. This guy can have some connection to the original David Linus Microchip Lieberman who Frank murdered to death for betraying him back in the early aughts, or he can just be some rando who took on the hackerman name.
He appears to Frank in Weirdworld as some sort of spirit while the kids are sleeping. New Microchip has projected himself in there using magic. He offers to bring Frank out of Weirdworld, but in exchange, Frank has to grant him a favor. Frank tells him to go fuck himself with extra sauce. New Microchip offers to save the kids, too, and Frank is a sucker for kids. So he agrees.
(I'm picturing New Microchip kinda like that nerd guy from the animated Atlantis movie, but OG Microchip was also fat, so like Atlantis guy with a little extra pudge. Cute, though.)
Frank is back on Earth. The kids are free and get sent to someone, probably Natasha because Frank trusts her and she'd look at them and go "what the literal hell" and I think that would be funny. New Microchip has a very Frank-like backstory where his family got killed, and he wants Frank to kill their killers. Frank is opposed because His War Is Over and he doesn't like being forced to do things. But he has to go along because of the magic deal.
Punisher skull comes back. Frank mows the people New Microchip wants dead down in a very typical, Frank-like way. New Microchip also outfits him with a battle van and provides really good tech support. When it's done, Frank is automatically released and is no longer bound to New Microchip.
Naturally, Frank goes to kill him. He finds New Microchip sitting out back looking at the scenery of some sort with a loaded gun waiting nearby. Waiting for Frank. New Microchip's job is done, and he gave up everything to do it. He expects Frank to kill him.
Instead, Frank is like. Grudgingly impressed that this guy had the balls to take what's coming to him instead of trying to run. He also likes his new battle van and could get used to that sort of thing. So, he offers New Microchip a job.
Ok. Here's the crucial part. If this was a new run, Frank should be done with this round of gratuitous violence by issue 3-5, and he and New Microchip should be fucking before issue 10. It needs to be played exactly the same was as if New Microchip were a woman. He's patching Frank up or something, and then they start kissing, fade to black, next page shows them in bed together.
Marvel needs to really play up Frank being bisexual. Not gay. Bisexual. Frank loved his wife, and that's very important to his backstory. Also, gay and not bisexual Frank gives off this weird vibe like being gay helped make him the Punisher, and that would be a nightmare for the PR team and for me personally. But they need to make him SO queer. To the point where people see those stupid thin blue line Punisher skulls and go...isn't that the one who has a boyfriend now?
Angry right-wingers with guns will be burning their shirts and tearing the decals off their cars. Frank's fan base will return to where it belongs: with weird comic book freaks who think he's a funny little guy.
One other thing. There has to be one splash cover where Frank is bridal carrying New Microchip to safety. There should be an explosion behind them. The explosion should, inexplicably, be in the shape of a skull. Picture this. It's very romantic.
#frank castle#punisher#shitpost central#but also I'm kind of serious#when you read this I hope you think of me as that guy with the red string from it's always sunny#also this didn't really fit in the post but#Frank should magically know that Daredevil is Matt know#if dying made Elektra remember all the shit Frank went through should do him the same favor
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theseus was one of the worst men in greek mythology but I feel like in terms of hero status he was also one of the funniest. bro peaked in highschool. one hit wonder. did one good movie then fell off. immediately after his first big hit he got cancelled into oblivion and just kind of fucked around being a dick for the rest of his life
#like it can't be stressed enough he abandoned ariadne AND caused his fathers death ON THE WAY HOME from killing the minotaur#served for like 1 day and that was all he could manage#the thing with pirithous is so funny too. like they're AWFUL. they're the shonen anime that's so misogynistic it just turns gay#forgot which source it's from but the part where phaedra's like if you love pirithous so much why don't you marry HIM 🙄#comedy queen get his ass#anyway I'm reading jennifer saint's ariadne retelling it's sooo good#I might talk more about it later since I may as well just put my thoughts here#and I have lots of thoughts!!#I'm going to read her elektra retelling next and I KNOW I'll have stuff to say about that#sapphire's random thoughts#greek mythology
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If you spend some time reading Aeschylus, Euripides etc. you really begin to wonder why those YA authors feel the need to go around "retelling" these stories from the womens point of view like??? hello. it's already been done. like centuries ago. tell me Euripides doesn't manage to raise the deepest sympathy & understanding for both Clytemnestra and Elektra and Helena and Cassandra I dare you
#spent my evening shift today reading elektra :)#since my department is running on half of its manpower & all my superiors are on vacation & i'm sooo done with this week#wenn die katz ausm haus ist tanzen die mäuse aufm tisch hihi#⚓
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Woah you also ship Matt Milla congrats on having good taste
i haven't gotten very far into their relationship (rn i'm on their first date, i believe?), but they seem really sweet and i think it's sad how things ended between them.
#experimentaldata#kimi replies#kimi reads dd#i think so far kirsten and milla are my favorite long term love interests#natasha and elektra were done so weirdly canonically that i probably shouldn't ship them#but i like the versions that live in my head#matt/karen drives me crazy bc they're annoying 🙄#glori and heather i'm just like whatever#idr know of his other love interests yet. just the main ones i guess.
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me versus my hatred for the s*xualization of Elektra's character and her feminine rage to the point that there is a psychological complex named after it
#⚡ ooc. ── ❝ 𝘖𝘩 𝘯𝘰 𝘪𝘵'𝘴 𝘔𝘢𝘳𝘪. ❞#I'm just gonna need the men to shut the fuck up about women and psychology for a minute honestly#the whole take is so backwards and I get Sophocles had a history of inc*stuous themes but#he is not the progenitor of her story and also I don't even think that was his own intention with elektra specifically in his retelling#and so many interpretations are done by men and completely misunderstand her and the concept of her feminine rage#which is why A.nne C.arson's translation is superior and I will die on this hill#(yes I am reading C.arson's Oresteia again shhhh)#a woman feels great grief and rage about her father's death at the hands of her mother? must be s*xual!#as if a woman's grief can't be full of rage without being tied to s*xuality or demonized and attributed as something unnatural and wrong#because women can only be viewed through that lens apparently#and as for how this has been attached to a psychological concept I once again say fuck you freud you freaky bastard
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elektra, sophocles (trans. anne carson)
#you have NO idea how regular i'm feeling today#love you incestuous codependency <3#elektra#currently reading
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theres so many greek mythology retellings.....
#i'm always interested in greek mithology inspired books but my good i didn't realise just how many of them are being published nowadays#just finished ariadne and it was kinda mid ngl but ill still check elektra#guess ill keep reading those until i get fed up with the lukewarm feminist takes#this is the price we pay for tsoa's success ig...#eventually ill read the actual stuff but these are less scary than picking up odyssey and illiad akshakj
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What if I didn't stop laughing during all the Deadpool and Wolverine movie and I turned to look at her like 'did ya hear that too' and she was laughing too and it was so perfect and then I proceed to almost fucking die 'cause OH MY FUCKING GODS IS THAT ELEKTRA 💞💖💕💘💞💓💗💘💕💘
#we just have the kinda relationship wade and logan do#more or less#anyways#got sucked to go watch a marvel movie#but#it's deadpool#I couldn't not agree to see it#(I think I lost a lung laughing)#besides#(even if she likes the motherfucking green ass carrot hair)#she was there <3#also#I had the biggest elektra obsession at eleven#I think she was my really really first acknowledged lesbian crush#Do I remember something?#just the fucking red suit and the bring me back to life and her cool blades and#dio shit#finally watched the movie so I can explore the tag 😌#I really shouldn't be distracted from reading the Jaime Reyes comics from 2006 on#but a night of research won't do nothing bad right#it's deadpool I mean#you can't blame me#(I'm sorry Jaime I swear I love you my guy <3)
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just finished elektra... sophokles had to have known he was one of the Greatest from the fact he wrote that and antigone alone my god
#next up ... orestes!#i don't think i've ever read euripides so i'm excited#elektra#antigone#sophokles#currently reading
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Clytemnestra again mentions the curse of the House of Atreus in this chapter, reassuring herself that it ended when Agamemnon spared Aegisthus and how the stories will remain just stories for the rest of her children's lives. And then she watches Agamemnon sacrifice Iphigenia at Aulis
#please feel free to ignore this#I'm reading Elektra#The way Jennifer Saint describes the events leading up to it and Clytemnestra's growing dread vs. her desire to assuage her daughter's fear#Clytemnestra says 'I did not like the idea of Agamemnon bargaining our daughter to the immortals in this way'#imagining that Iphigenia's marriage to Achilles is what Agamemnon traded for the winds to sail them to Troy#Sorry Clytemnestra it's actually worse!
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Erica Schultz' Elektra run so far has been intensely frustrating to me, because on one hand, she clearly has more love and knowledge about Elektra as a character than Zdarsky ever did. Little details, like Elektra's burner phone from when she was an assassin, or just giving her a character outside of Matt – these things are pretty good, and I like them. She clearly understands the feel of the character, and she's certainly done more for Elektra than Zdarsky ever did.
But I feel like every Elektra story of hers so far has fallen short in the same way. And I think it's because she's depicting Elektra a little more like herself, but seems ignorant to how unhealthy, uncomfortable, out of character, demeaning and unnecessary Daredevil!Elektra actually is. And she keeps squandering opportunities to shed the mask.
Maybe it's that her hands are tied. Or maybe it's that she genuinely likes writing Elektra in this way.
But there's something endlessly frustrating about the marketing for Unleash Hell using "Murder is an Art!" as a tagline, but then doubling down on the fact she doesn't kill now.
They're giving Elektra her font back. They're giving her a red band comic. But they refuse to let her reclaim her own name, or to have a life outside sharing Matt's identity just to please him. It's so exhausting.
#elektra natchios#I just. FUCK man.#I keep reading and feeling hopeful#but it's just so damn degrading to continually strip elektra of her agency and independence#and then you see people on reddit who've clearly never read elektra comics who say that they prefer this over how she was#but their examples of how she was are all just... the netflix show or miller dd#it's actually so sad that she's existed as a character outside of matt for most of her comic publication#but chip fucking zdarsky my sworn enemy decided to get his greasy little mitts on her#and now people who don't like or respect elektra as a character say they like this change to her status quo and hope it sticks#fuck you fuck you fuck you#also to be clear I don't hate you if you're an elektra fan and you like her current state. I'm happy for you#but it fills me with rage and sorrow every time I think about it too much
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won't somebody come take me home? [Logan/Reader]
Summary: You've been abandoned to the Void after experiencing heartbreak in your universe. Instead of becoming food for Alioth or one of Cassandra's underlings, you find a new family with the resistance seeking to bring her down. When Johnny doesn't come back to the hideout, you keep watch in the hopes of seeing his return. Instead, you find a Deadpool variant fighting someone who looks achingly familiar. Someone who reminds you of your old life and the person who broke your heart. When you finally come face to face with a Logan after being pruned from your universe, you're not expecting the longing you're met with or the fact that in his universe, you were his wife. Word Count: 7.7k Author's Note: I've wanted to write for X-Men for so long and then I saw Deadpool and Wolverine and fell in love with Logan all over again. If you like this, please let me know! I'm so nervous about writing for a new fandom. And if you want to see more X-Men stuff from me, please let me know that as well! Reader's song for this is definitely I'm With You by Avril Lavigne, but I kind of imagine Logan's ends up being Hanging By a Moment by Lifehouse.
closer to where I started // all the smiles that are ever gonna haunt me
Read on AO3
Everyone in the Void had a tragic backstory that was befitting a hero or villain or anything in between. You were the ones who were lost, abandoned, or forgotten by your worlds and the people you cared about more than anyone else.
You didn't remember much about how you got to the Void, but you had a pretty good understanding of why you were dropped into the barren wasteland for the multiverse's landfill.
Like most people in the Void, you were here because of heartbreak. The one person you had loved with your entire being had loved someone else. You had given him your all, but he only gave you a piece of himself. And when he ripped that piece of himself away, leaving you aching and broken, you were swept out like unwanted trash and right into the Void.
"What's got you so down today, ma chérie?" Remy dropped down into the chair at your side.
You huffed out a laugh that was nowhere near amused. "Besides the fact that we're all stuck here and trying to avoid Cassandra and her wandering fingers?" You brought your hand up and wriggled them in Remy's face, reluctantly letting out a laugh when he snapped his teeth at them.
"Ah, there's that smile," he mused, bumping his shoulder into yours. "You thinkin' 'bout your old life?"
You rolled your eyes, inanely feeling your throat tighten as you fought the urge to cry. You kept your gaze on the bottle of whiskey on the table. Remy reached for it, but he met resistance and turned a glare on you.
You shrugged your shoulders before dropping the forcefield. "I had a dream about him last night," you admitted with a scowl. "About what happened and how no one on my team had my back. How they all thought it was inevitable." You snorted before you quickly grabbed the bottle and took a swig, relishing the burn that traveled down your throat and sent warmth pulsing through your chest. You handed it over to Remy, ignoring his obvious annoyance.
"Listen, you're a lot better off now than you were with those fuckers," he consoled as he finally wrapped his hand around the bottle. "But don't go gettin' between me and my drink, now," he warned, his eyes briefly flashing red before fading away. "I'm not like those assholes who abandoned you. You've got nothin' to hate me for."
"You're real shit at pep talks, you know that?" Johnny cut in, knocking into Remy as he walked by. "Leave Y/N alone. She doesn't want to put up with your bullshit right now."
"And you suppose she wants to put up with yours? All you've got is bullshit," Remy taunted, idly twirling a card between his fingers. It was half a threat, but Johnny would only fight fire with fire and Remy knew it. Elektra had forbidden both of them from using their powers in the hideout, since they had almost burned it down last time.
"Will you both just stop?" You groaned, letting your head hit the table. Someone reached out to pat you on the shoulder, but you didn't bother to look and see who did it. "I love and respect you both dearly, but if you leave another scorch mark in here, then we'll all be in trouble."
Remy obediently stowed the card back up his sleeve while Johnny rolled his eyes.
"Yeah, whatever," he sighed before making for the door. “See you later.”
"Where are you going?" You called, watching him retreat.
"I'll be around," Johnny answered, shooting you a smirk over his shoulder. "I always come back, don't I?"
You didn't get a chance to respond before he was gone. You always worried about Johnny when he went on his little trips around the Void. He swore he would be careful not to run into any of Cassandra's goons, but you knew all of your days were limited. Whether it was Alioth or Cassandra or one of the many rogue Deadpools wandering around, it was only a matter of time before trouble found you.
Remy stood up and placed the half-empty bottle of whiskey in front of you. "Just this once," he allowed with a wink. "You appreciate that, though, you hear?"
"Thanks," you muttered before reaching for the bottle.
You spent the rest of the day trying to block out the dream while you trained with Laura.
You were so caught up in your own thoughts that you didn't realize you had company.
"Damn, what's got you so riled up?"
You turned to look at Eric, surprised to see him standing there. You then realized your knuckles had split open and you had trashed the makeshift punching bag you had made out of an old blanket and some sand.
"Nothing," you deflected, half-tempted to go invisible just so no one could see you. Even though he was wearing sunglasses, you knew you had his full attention and you didn't want another lecture on leaving your past behind.
No one on your team was good at that, but you were arguably the worst at letting your pain go.
You always hated when you dreamt about Logan. His last words to you echoing in your mind over and over. You hadn't been enough for him, but Jean? Jean was everything he wanted. You supposed your powers paled in comparison and you would never measure up when all you could do was conjure forcefields and become invisible. Logan had been in love with her from the first moment he laid eyes on her, but you had never seen that look on his face when he looked at you.
It was a pity that you had given Logan everything only to be cast aside for the one who truly held his heart.
If Johnny were there, he would have told Blade to mind his own business, but he still hadn't come back.
"Again," Laura prompted, drawing your attention towards the punching bag. It was half-demolished, but you figured you still had some fight in you.
You noticed her shake her head at Eric as you turned away and focused all your hurt into your fists, watching the bag fall apart.
Johnny hadn't returned by the next morning and you were starting to worry.
You considered everyone your family, but you had a special bond with Johnny. He had been the first person to welcome you to the resistance and you, specifically your powers, had reminded him of his sister. He opened up to you about how much he missed his team, his family, and you told him about the heartbreak you had endured in your universe.
"I'll tell you what, if I ever get my hands on your Logan, I'll light the fucker on fire."
You felt a laugh bubble out of you. It was the first time you had laughed in ages and it felt so good to know you could still find joy in things. "He'd just regenerate."
"Not when I'm done with him," Johnny promised. "I'll cook him 'til he's just a heap of ash and then you'll dance on his remains."
You shook your head, but let Johnny carry on with his elaborate plan for revenge on your behalf. Johnny would never meet your Logan and you knew you would never actually see him again. Everyone in the Void was forgotten and there was no escape.
"You worried about Johnny?" Elektra wondered, coming to stand at your side.
You were keeping an eye on the horizon, searching for any sign that Johnny was coming home.
"It's not like him to be gone this long without some kind of message he's okay.
"He's gotten this far, hasn't he?" Elektra pointed out, shooting you a reassuring look. "He'll be fine."
You nodded your head, but didn't budge from your spot.
"You plan on staying out here all night?" Elektra asked.
"If I have to," you admitted with a shrug of your shoulders. "What if he's in trouble?"
"Then you won't be any help to him sleep-deprived," she answered.
"I've had worse," you deflected with a forced grin.
Elektra sighed, but didn't try to dissuade you again.
You had a pair of binoculars Laura had scavenged and you were doing your best to keep an eye on your surroundings. You were surveying a forest when something caught your attention. You focused on the sight, wondering for a moment if Elektra had been right and sleep deprivation was messing with your mind.
You pulled the binoculars away and blinked a few times before looking through them again.
"Ah fuck," you groaned when you realized that what you were seeing was real.
"What's wrong?" Laura asked, startling you.
"Shit," you hissed, nearly dropping the binoculars. You handed them over and pointed towards what previously held your attention. "You see that?"
"Is that--?" Laura cut herself off before shooting you a disbelieving look. "It's him."
"With a Deadpool," you confirmed with a nod of your head.
"We should get them before someone else does," Laura suggested, handing the binoculars back to you.
You hesitated, knowing she was right, but hating the idea of seeing him again.
"I can go alone," Laura offered. You knew she also loved her Logan, but he had been like a father to her up until his final moments. Your Logan had managed to bring you nothing but pain and insecurity.
"No," you told her with a firm shake of your head. Johnny had gone off alone and now it had been almost two days since the last time you saw him. In the Void, that was as good as a death sentence. "I'll go with you."
You let the others know you were off to rescue two new recruits to the resistance and helpfully left out the fact that one of those people was a Logan variant.
Laura led the way and you followed in her tracks. You kept yourself invisible, knowing that if anyone came after Laura, then you could use your presence as a surprise. You had also learned to use your forcefields as a weapon as much as a defense and you were ready if anyone tried to attack.
Once you got to the station wagon, you let yourself become visible again. You slowly approached the car while Laura investigated the clearing for any signs that you might have been followed. You could see the Deadpool variant wrapped up in the seatbelts, but you couldn't help but let your focus stray to Logan.
He was different from your Logan, but seeing his face hurt all the same. Your Logan had taken everything from you and given nothing back except for pain. This Logan was a stranger, but he still brought up familiar feelings. Love and confusion and agony.
"Is he yours?" Laura wondered, finally joining you in your study of Logan.
"No," you assured her. "Mine would've never been caught dead in the yellow suit," you admitted with just the tiniest hint of relief. You never wanted to see your Logan again, but you couldn't help but admit to yourself that didn't mean you never wanted to see any other Logan. You were scared, terrified of the pain he might cause you, but you hadn't been able to let go of the love you held for him. You were sure, even in that moment, that you would love Logan in every universe. It was too bad he wouldn't love you just the same.
Although, you supposed you didn't really have a Logan. You never did, since the one from your universe was never yours in the first place.
Doubt and wariness began to creep in and you started to herd Laura towards the Honda you were half-sure belonged to the Nicepool variant. "You drive," you prompted, opening the passenger door seat and carefully sitting among the wreckage and blood that was practically painted on every surface of the car.
Laura started the car and you glanced over your shoulder, waiting for the two backseat occupants to stir, but they were both still knocked out.
"They really did a number on each other," you muttered, your gaze already back on Logan.
Laura was silent for long enough that you thought she was ignoring you. "It's not your Logan," she reminded you after a couple of minutes. You realized you were still watching him and finally forced yourself to turn around in your seat.
"It's not," you confirmed, studying your hands in your lap. You let them shift in and out of visibility, a nervous habit you had when you were torn between fight and flight.
"Then he's not the one who hurt you," she continued, keeping her focus on the path in front of you.
"He's not the one who saved you," you shot back. The way she looked at this Logan like she was seeing her savior miraculously alive all over again had felt like a punch in the gut. You were both mourning and the source of it had just dropped right back into your lives. "He might be worse," you pointed out.
"He might be better," she argued with a quick glance at you. "He might not even know us."
"Yeah," you sighed, reaching out to place a hand on her shoulder, silently apologizing for being so defensive. "Eric's right," you conceded with a grimace. "I need to let it go."
"Hard to let something like that go," she allowed with a soft smile at you. She was the only one who knew the full story. Johnny knew most of it and the others knew enough, but Laura had loved her own Logan like family. She knew what it was like to lose him, albeit in a very different way.
When you got back to the hideout, Laura helped free Deadpool while you formed a forcefield around Logan and used it to lift him out of the car. Charles had claimed it was a form of telekinesis, but you always told him you were just controlling the forcefield. Whatever was inside it just happened to move with it. If you dropped the forcefield, then whatever was inside it would fall.
Laura dragged Deadpool inside while you let Logan hover through the air and into the hideout. Laura left Deadpool on the floor, but you were careful with Logan and let him hover just over the bed you used before letting him go.
Laura shot you a bemused look before going to let the others know you had company.
You weren't really sure what to do with yourself, so you settled for pacing from one end of the room to the other. You were halfway across the room when you heard a rustling noise behind you. You half-hoped it was Deadpool waking up, but when you turned around, it was to see Logan squinting up at the ceiling.
You froze, not daring to move a muscle. Logan blinked a few times before he began to sit up. He stopped and then tilted his head up, sniffing the air. You had always found the way he used his enhanced sense of smell adorable, even if no one else did. He suddenly turned and buried his face in your pillow, pulling in deep breaths. He reached up to clutch the pillow in his hand as he sat up, keeping it pressed to his face.
You weren't even really sure what was going on, so by the time he finally lowered the pillow and met your gaze, you were staring at him completely dumbstruck.
Several emotions warred for control on Logan's face when he saw you. Grief, despair, heartbreak, hope, disbelief, and relief. Finally, he seemed to pull them all together into a neutral expression.
"Y/N," he started, taking a step towards you.
You instinctively took a step back. You knew that this Logan wasn't the one who hurt you, but it was hard to let all of that go when someone who looked exactly like your Logan was staring right at you.
"You're alive," he tried again, taking another step, as if he was drawn to you.
"I am," you answered, your hands clenched into fists at your side. You couldn't handle the way Logan was looking at you. He looked at you like you were his whole world. You would have killed to get your Logan to look at you like that. But having it now, from a different Logan, felt equal parts thrilling and unsettling. "Who am I to you?" You asked, needing to know what you were dealing with now. You had assumed maybe you were part of Logan's team in his universe, but he was hopelessly in love with Jean and didn't give a fuck about you. The way he was looking at you told an entirely different story.
"You're--," he started before he looked down at his left hand. You could see a wedding band around his ring finger. "You're my wife," he finally admitted as he balled his hand into a fist. "You were, at least," he added with a grimace. "And me? What am I to you in your universe?"
You didn't know whether to tell the truth or lie. But Logan had always known you way too well and any story you spun would unravel as you told it. "I loved you," you finally confessed. "But you left me for someone else," you continued, noting the way Logan's expression tightened, rage flashing in his eyes.
"Who?" He growled, advancing on you.
It was your biggest shame and worst heartbreak, so you faltered over the name for a moment. But you weren't even in the same universe as her or him anymore and it was time for you to stop running from your pain.
"Jean. He left me for Jean, alright? It didn't matter that I loved him and it didn't matter that we were together. Scott died and Jean needed someone and apparently that couldn't be anyone but him. He told me it was nothing, but I knew. He never looked at me the way you just did. He looked at her like she was the only person he cared about and when he left me for her, I ended up here," you hissed, finally walking towards Logan. "And I bet neither of them ever gave a fuck that I just up and disappeared. So, seeing you now has brought up all the shit he put me through," you snarled, reaching out to push at his shoulder.
"Y/N, I--," he started, reaching out for you. His expression was nearly reverent as he let his hand fall on your shoulder.
"Don't," you said, pushing away from him. "I'm not your wife," you snapped, hating the way his expression closed off and was replaced with that look he got when he was trying not to feel anything at all.
"And I'm not him," he shot back. His gaze drifted to the side and he reached out to grab a bottle of Remy's whiskey. He popped the top off the bottle and took a long swig.
You heard someone groan before you looked over at Deadpool. He brought a hand up to his head and Logan turned to watch him. He took another drink, keeping the bottle close to his chest, as he approached Wade.
"Ugh, what's with the angry bear staring me down?" Wade wondered, finally sitting up. "Also, where the hell are we? Are we about to be skinned and used as decoration for some post-apocalyptic lair?"
"Do you ever shut up?" Logan growled, taking another drink.
You knew it took a lot to get Logan drunk, but at the rate he was going, he would end up there by nightfall.
Deadpool finally scanned the room and noticed you. He got to his feet and pointed a finger at you. "Oh, holy shit. You're Y/N! You're a big part of this guy's tragic backstory, I can tell ya that, so what are you doing here?" Wade reached out to clap a hand to Logan's shoulder and got brushed off.
"That's enough!" Elektra called before walking into the room.
Wade looked shocked to see Elektra, but his eyes went wide at the sight of Blade striding into the room. Gambit then made his entrance before Laura took up the rear of the group.
Introductions went around, before Wade started in on Gambit and his accent. You could tell Remy was reluctantly amused, but he was distracted by something else.
Remy dismissed Wade and focused in on Logan. He shot you a quick, concerned look before he began flipping a card as he studied Logan. "Well, we've never had a Wolverine up in here before. Not sure we've ever wanted one here before," he said with another look at you. "I can tell you now it's just a common courtesy to at least ask before you go drinking up all my liquor."
"It's a good thing I don't give a fuck," Logan responded before taking another drink.
Remy's eyes burned red as he muttered an insult under his breath. He let the card in his hand go, letting it slice the bottle of liquor in half. Glass and whiskey rained down on Logan's boots, but he looked unbothered. He reached out to grab another bottle before pulling the top off and taking a drink.
"Oh, you sure are an asshole, aren't you? I'm starting to see why you hate this one," Remy continued, aiming the last sentence at you.
"You hate him?" Wade asked, whipping his head back and forth, from you to Logan and back again. Wade gasped and turned to point an accusing finger at Logan. "You and you," he pointed to you, "aren't a you in your universe?" He pressed his hands together, letting his fingers interlock. "What'd he do? Was he too busy practicing his brooding in the mirror? He try to slip you a little adamantium surprise in the bedroom? Did he--"
"Shut up," Logan snapped, tightening his grip on the bottle in his hand.
"You don't know what the fuck you're talking about," you admonished Wade.
Wade held his hands up in surrender, but he reached out to put a hand on Logan's shoulder. "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned, my friend," he consoled before he approached you. He held his arms out as he walked towards you. "Come here, baby bird, and tell Papa Deadpool all about it," he said as he wrapped his arms around you.
"Get your hands off her," Logan growled, unsheathing his claws.
You brought a forcefield up between you and Wade. It was big enough to encompass his chest and abdomen and you used it to forcefully push him back. You slammed him into the wall, easing up, just to slam him into it again.
"Alright, alright," he coughed out, holding his hands up in surrender. "Don't piss off the Invisible Woman, got it," he conceded as you let your forcefield drop.
You rolled your eyes before crossing your arms over your chest. "That's not what they call me." The reminder of Johnny's sister brought up the worry you had for him. "Where the hell did you two come from?"
Wade did most of the talking and explained about the TVA, Cassandra, and their near-miss with Alioth.
"No one's ever made it out of Cassandra's clutches before," Elektra observed with something verging on respect in her tone.
"No one alive," Eric interjected with an unimpressed glare at Deadpool.
"Well, she is quite terrifying and a little grabby," Wade allowed with a nod of his head.
"One of ours has been missing for two days," you told Wade, carefully not looking at Logan. Logan had been watching you the whole time and you knew he was only mourning a ghost, but you hated how much you liked finally having Logan's undivided attention. "His name is Johnny. Did you see him?"
"The little flameball might've made an appearance, sure, but he's not with us," Wade explained with a flippant wave of his hand.
"Yeah, because you fucking got him killed with your big mouth," Logan snapped at Wade.
"Johnny's dead?" You asked, not wanting to believe it. You loved the others like family, but Johnny had practically been a brother to you. Sure, he let his mouth get him in trouble half the time, but he always managed to get himself out of it. "What the hell happened?"
"Cassandra decided she liked his insides on the outside," Wade answered, "because she's a megalomaniacal, psychotic asshole. Johnny’s words, not mine."
"Well, we've all been knowin' that," Remy said, idly shuffling a deck of cards in his hands. "But what're we gonna do about her, huh? She's got an army and we've just got us."
"Look, you've all been forgotten by your universes, but we can still take her if we team up. You got a Magneto here?" Wade questioned, hope in his voice that you knew was about to be crushed.
You moved to sit down at the table while you listened to the conversation carry on. There was a lot happening all at once and you didn’t know how to process any of it. Wade was desperate to get back to his own timeline, but Logan only seemed resigned. You didn't know how to accept the fact that Johnny was dead and you didn't know how to ignore the fact that Logan was still watching you.
When a plan was made to go after Cassandra and use Juggernaut's helmet to block her powers, you reluctantly agreed that it had some merit. If only because you wanted to get any type of revenge on Cassandra that you could to avenge Johnny.
The others were all on board and you knew most of them wanted nothing more than to bring Cassandra down as well. It was a suicide mission for most of you, but you figured if it meant stopping Cassandra and saving someone's universe, even if that someone was Wade Wilson, then it might be worth it.
"I'm in," you found yourself saying.
"Like hell you are," Logan cut in. "You'll just get yourself killed again and I can't--"
"I'm not dead," you pointed out, aware that the others were watching the pair of you. "I'm right here, because I'm not the one you lost."
"Well, I sure as hell don't want to go losing you again. You can't tell me you think this whackjob's plan is actually going to work out? He’s an idiot."
“Sticks and stones,” Wade muttered, rocking on his heels as he looked at Logan. “Sticks and stones.”
"You can do whatever you want," you told Logan, finally standing from your seat at the table. "But I'm going and if I die? Then at least I die doing something that's not just hiding and waiting for my inevitable end. At least I can help someone, even if it's a Deadpool," you said, gesturing towards Wade.
"Thanks?" Wade tried, sounding torn between flattered and insulted.
You didn't give Logan a chance to reply, because you left the room, opting to walk outside to get some distance from him.
Later, you heard from Remy that you were heading out first thing in the morning. You agreed to be ready by then and spent the rest of the evening invisible. You wanted to be alone, but you also hated the idea of losing one last opportunity to talk to Logan, even if he wasn't yours.
He was outside, staring into the fire he started, and steadily drinking Remy's liquor. You approached him as Laura was leaving his side. Even though you were still invisible, she seemed to know you were there, and walked around you.
You stayed a few feet behind him, watching him frown into the fire.
"I know you're there," Logan called out, turning to look over his shoulder. "You were never good at hiding from me."
You let yourself go visible before you continued to walk towards him. "My Logan didn't really give a shit about me, so I guess he knew where to find me, he just didn't care," you observed with a sigh. Having this Logan around was only showing you what you had missed out on in your universe with your Logan. You reached out to grab the bottle from Logan before taking a drink and handing it back. "You know, I wanted nothing more than for him to love me back. But I wasn't enough for him. And he knew, he knew everything I felt for him, but he never felt the same. I was just someone to warm his bed while his thoughts were with someone else."
Logan was quiet for a few moments before he held the bottle back out to you.
"You've made it clear you're not my wife," he started, keeping his gaze on the fire. "But I don't think you get that I'm not him. I see you and, God, I wish I could keep you safe. I wasn't able to save her. I wasn't able to save any of them and it's my fault my team, my family, my wife are all gone. I walked away and they died because of it," he admitted and you could see a tear begin to slip down his cheek. You had never seen your Logan so vulnerable and you didn't know what to do with this one. "I don't want to lose you again. I know you're not her, but I don't want to walk away and know that you died because of it."
"Then don't walk away," you whispered, moving until you were right beside him. You could feel the heat emanating off him and it sent a shiver down your spine. You had felt the chilling sense of isolation for so long that feeling Logan again felt like you were coming back to life.
"I know I wasn't happy to see you," you allowed with a grimace. "But since you got here, you've done nothing but remind me that I could have had what I wanted all along, but I was stuck in the wrong damn universe. And maybe it was possible for my Logan to love me all along and I just wasn't enough."
"Your Logan is a fucking idiot," he growled, finally looking at you. "You're here in this shithole because of him and you're ready to sacrifice yourself for someone you don't even know. He was the one who wasn't good enough. I guess I'm more like him than I would want to be."
You took a chance and reached out to grab Logan's hand. You were both grieving different people and you knew you weren't his wife, but you wanted to offer him comfort all the same. You also couldn't deny that the feeling of Logan's hand in yours felt like a balm for the pain you had been carrying around since falling into the Void.
His hand tightened around yours and you saw some of the tension leave his shoulders.
"You're enough, Logan," you assured him. "And I believe in you," you confessed. "You don't have to go tomorrow, but I'm going to be there. And if this is the last moment I ever get with you, then there's one thing I want to do."
Logan furrowed his brow in confusion before his expression smoothed out into surprise. You had leaned forward, just barely letting your lips brush his, waiting for him to either lean in or push you away.
You waited for a beat longer, sure you were making an idiot of yourself, before you felt Logan's hand at your hip. He pulled you closer, practically into his lap, as he returned the kiss. It was passionate and tender and in turns aggressive and searching. His tongue was twined around yours and his teeth were nipping at your lips and your head was beginning to spin from the rush. Logan let out a whimper and his hand clutched your hip tighter, and you knew you were going to have a bruise there by the next morning, but you didn’t mind that there would be a reminder of this moment.
You reluctantly pulled away, meeting his eyes and noticing how Logan looked like he was ready to drag you back into another kiss.
"Thank you," you whispered, reaching up a hand to brush your thumb over his bottom lip. You let it drag down briefly and leaned forward to press a chaste kiss to it. Your Logan had been rough and demanding and uncaring, but the love and want this Logan had poured into the kiss had shown you what it would have been like for the love of your life to love you back. Maybe, with that memory, your death the next day would be a little sweeter.
"Y/N," Logan started, but didn't continue.
You offered him a sad smile and started to stand. "I should try to sleep. I've got a big day tomorrow."
You moved to leave, but Logan reached out and grabbed your hand. He reeled you back towards him, causing you to drop down into his lap, but he caught you by the hips. He wrapped his arms around your waist and trailed his hand up your back before it was resting against the back of your neck. He pulled you down into another kiss, this one just as intense, but less frenzied. Logan kept you in place with just the slightest pressure of his hand on your neck and you let him pour everything he had into it.
By the time you pulled away, you were breathless and speechless, reluctant to leave now that you had another taste of him.
"I'll see you in the morning," Logan promised, finally releasing you from his hold.
It took you while to shake off your daze, but then you realized what he was telling you.
You felt a smile tug at your lips before you got off his lap.
"See you in the morning," you agreed before leaving Logan in search of your bed.
The drive in the Honda Odyssey was cramped, but Wade insisted if it could house an all-night brawl between a Deadpool and a Wolverine, then it would hold the rest of you just fine all the way to Cassandra's lair. And then he started spouting off something about safety features and cup holders and you started to wonder if following his plan had been the dumbest thing you had ever done.
You found yourself sneaking glances at Logan at the rear of the car. He was watching you the whole time and every time your eyes met, a little spark of heat shot through you. Maybe he wasn't your Logan, but he had helped you begin to heal all the same. And now you were starting to fall for an entirely different Logan who was likely leaving the Void while you stayed behind and died to get him out.
Life had never been fair to you, but you hated that it was downright cruel to you as well.
By the time you were arriving at Cassandra’s, you were starting to wonder if there had ever been a happy ending for you in store or if it was just supposed to be one tragedy after another.
You lined up with the others as you faced down Cassandra's henchmen. You could see Azazel popping in and out of view and Psylocke trailing through the crowd. Juggernaut was staring down the group while Toad perched high above, a smirk on his face. There were dozens of them and you had no idea how you were going to pull it off, but even if you did die, at least it was to save someone's universe, even if it wasn't your own.
"You know how long I've been waiting for this? Ooohuee, I'm about to make a name for myself here," Remy boasted, eagerly bouncing on his feet while he began to charge a card.
"I don't think any of you walk away from this," Logan pointed out, sending a quick glance your way.
"You just make sure they know what happened here today," Remy continued, not seeming to care that he was staring death right in the face.
"We'll watch your six," Blade told Logan and Wade. "You get up there and we'll get you that helmet."
Before he could follow Wade, Logan turned to you and pulled you close. He pressed a kiss to your lips, one full of longing and grief. "I don't want to leave you," he murmured into the kiss.
You pulled back to meet his eyes, ignoring the fact that you felt like you were losing him all over again. "What you're fighting for is more important," you told him. "Maybe we'll meet again in another universe."
"Maybe," he agreed before kissing you again.
This one was brief, but it left you wanting more.
You watched Logan follow Wade before you were caught up in the fight between your friends and Cassandra's lackies.
The fight was terrifying, because the stakes were so high. You flickered in and out of visibility as needed and used your forcefields to protect your friends or attack your enemies. You used a forcefield to gather rocks and then propelled it into someone just to turn invisible to avoid someone's knife.
You were exhausted as the battle waged on and you knew that circumstances were beginning to look dire for you and your friends. Most of you were hurt and bleeding, and the fight was beginning to drain out of you.
You got distracted by Laura taking Juggernaut out and managing to get his helmet up to where Logan and Wade were no doubt dealing with Cassandra despite Psylocke intervening. You moved towards them, but you felt a searing pain in your side and you looked down to see the end of Azazel’s tail sticking through your flesh.
He jerked you back towards him and a blade sliced through his tail, freeing you. You were quick to form a forcefield around Azazel before he could escape and you began to press in on the sides, shrinking it down so he had nowhere to go. You could see him trying to teleport out, but it wasn’t working, and a look of panic flashed across his face.
You kept pressing in until his skin started to split and blood began to pour. All at once, you swept the sides in, watching as Azazel was crushed. You let the forcefield go and watched as his remains fell to the ground with a splat.
“You squashed him like a bug,” Eric observed with a nod of his head, cleaning Azazel’s blood off his blade. “Impressive.”
“Thanks,” you smiled at Blade, glancing down at the gash in your side.
“Keep your head,” he warned you just as someone rushed at you. You went invisible and stepped to the side, letting them impale themselves on Eric’s sword.
The battle took twists and turns, but after getting stabbed in the shoulder and nearly losing consciousness when someone hit you on the back of the head, you realized that the bodies were starting to drop, but your friends were still standing.
You figured your victory would be short-lived when the skies began to darken and Alioth showed on the horizon.
“He’s looking for a meal,” Elektra grunted, avoiding a hit to the side before using one of her twin sais to bring someone to their knees. She finished them off with a strike to their neck before she turned to look at the rest of you. “We need to get the hell out of here.”
You were distracted by a portal opening up in the air above you and you looked up in time to see Logan and Wade jumping through it.
Someone grabbed your arm and you instinctively moved to hit them, but you realized it was Elektra.
"Come on!" She yelled over the roar of Alioth and pulled you to cover inside Cassandra's lair.
"That was a close one," Remy said as he helped Blade into the makeshift shelter.
"But they got away," Laura pointed out with a small, satisfied smile.
"And we got to kill the fuckers that've been making our lives hell," Remy added with a grin. "Any of you see that one trick I pulled? I got the cards charged up and then guy went boom."
He looked so pleased with himself that you couldn’t stop the helpless little laugh you let out. The past few days had felt absurd and surreal, and you couldn’t even tell if it was all some fever dream. Maybe Remy had spiked his liquor to keep unsuspecting people out of it and you were currently back in the hideout, riding out one terrifying trip.
But when you twisted to the side, you felt like your side was splitting open all over again and you let out a gasp. Elektra knelt at your side, studying your wound with a frown.
"So, what happens now? Are we just stuck here until we know it's clear? We go back to our hideout and wait forever? Half of us need some kind of medical attention,” she pointed out, searching around her until she found a discarded jacket. She pressed it against your side and you let out a hiss of pain.
"Well, we didn't die, so at least there’s that," you offered with a shrug of your shoulders. "I figure we've earned some retirement. Even if we're still stuck here," you allowed with a wince as you pressed a hand to your shoulder. The wound was deep and still bleeding, but you figured you had suffered worse before. You were going to need stitches and painkillers and some more of Remy’s liquor, but at least you were still breathing.
You weren't sure how long you waited for the storm to pass, but by the time you got back outside, it was already dark. Most of the bodies were gone, consumed by Alioth, and you leaned into Elektra’s side as she helped you navigate the various body parts left behind.
"Think the car will make it back?" Remy wondered, surveying the Odyssey with its crushed sides and flat tires. It was practically drenched in blood and viscera, nearly indistinguishable as a vehicle.
"Why don't you start it up and see?" Eric prompted, looking at Gambit like he thought he was a special kind of stupid. “Maybe we can ride one of your little cards back to the hideout. How far can you throw them?”
"That won't be necessary," a voice interrupted, startling you.
A portal had opened up to your left and a woman had walked through it. She had soldiers behind her who were wearing uniforms with a TVA logo stamped on the right arm.
"Wade Wilson struck a deal for all of you," the woman continued, surveying the group. "It's time for all of you to go home."
“Home?” Remy repeated with a skeptical look at the rest of you. “What if we don’t have a home?”
“Then wherever you’d like to be,” she amended. “With conditions, of course.”
It turned out that Wade and Logan not only saved Wade's universe, but every universe. Cassandra had wanted nothing to exist except for the Void where she reigned and both of them had managed to stop her.
You never considered that your fight with Cassandra’s minions wound end with anything except for your death. You certainly never thought you would have the option to leave the Void.
You definitely didn't want to return home, so you asked if you could stay in Wade's universe. Logan and Laura had opted to stay as well and since your variant had never been born in Wade’s universe, you were welcome to stay. It felt like you were getting the opportunity to carve out the kind of life you wanted all along. One where you knew you would be welcome and wanted without fearing that you would be abandoned for someone else.
Now, you were sitting around a table with Wade's family and the beginnings of a new one for you. Laura was sitting to your left and Logan to your right and you couldn't help but feel like this was where you had belonged all along.
Logan had admitted that he wasn't allowed to try to save the people in his universe, but he wanted to be whatever you needed or wanted him to be in your new one. You knew that was a daunting order for someone like Logan, so you settled for telling him that you wanted to start at the beginning.
You wanted to get to know this Logan, because even though you already loved him, you knew that you wanted a clean slate. One where you weren’t comparing him to your universe’s Logan and one where you gave him every opportunity to show you that he was better. You also didn’t want him to just see the ghost of his wife in you, so you wanted him to get to know you.
You soaked up the love and laughter that flowed through the room and met Logan's gaze. You weren't even surprised to see that he was already watching you. You reached out to grab his hand, delighting in the way he immediately welcomed your touch.
You no longer felt forgotten and hopeless. Everything you had yearned for, fought for, in your old life had quite literally dropped right into your new one and you couldn't have been more grateful for another shot at happiness.
From the way Logan smiled at you and brought your hand up to kiss the back of it, you knew he was just as appreciative at the opportunity to turn his life back around.
"Thank you," you whispered to him, leaning over to rest your head on his shoulder.
"Nothing to thank me for," he answered before dropping another kiss on the crowd of your head.
You wanted to argue with him and tell him that he had saved you, but you figured you would tell him later. For now, you were going to enjoy the feeling of belonging you felt and look forward to the fact that there would be a later with Logan.
Edited To Add: I am writing a sequel! It's going to involve Cable (even though he didn't test well) and Logan getting payback on reader's original Wolverine on her behalf and a whole bunch of other fun surprises!! If you want to be tagged, just let me know!
The sequel is HERE for anyone interested!
This is now a whole series! Main post for the series is HERE.
#deadpool and wolverine#wolverine x reader#logan x reader#deadpool#wolverine#reader insert#marvel#marvel imagine#logan#logan howlett imagine#logan howlett#wolverine imagine#x men#my fic#x reader#imagine#marvel x reader#spoilers#when i'm with you i'm home 'verse
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Me back in 2015, after finishing wtiting a short story: i'm so proud of this one. It's so good. I'll never write something as good as that so I'll lock it away and nor review it cause it would be too much
2023 me doing a re-reading of various short stories have actuallt stuck with me and I consider good so i'm actually correcting: uh this... Is actually not half that good lol
#i am critical of what i write ofc but i can retain a sense of satisfaction looking back and when rereading i might be like lol wtf#is this or cringe but sometimes i'm like wow yknow this is actually good stuff! or nice prose here good job!#so like i am as much a fair judge as one can be for their own stuff#this story is just not It but here's the thing: it crawled so my later stuff could run. like for realllll#my dark/reverse manic pixie dream girl elektra existed in 2015 so borderline sociopath extraordinare claudia could be born in 2019#my male-gazy writing from back in the day walked so i could write stuff that actually starts to have a sense of a personal style.#the luke/elektra toxic relationship was the blueprint for all the ones that i've written afterwards!#laura writes#also i read my 5page 2014-15 short story about a lesbian writer that later served as spin off of a 2019 one i'm quite fond of and now. THAT#is good! i don't feel i have to rewrite anhthung#just some minor correctiosn here and there also i showed that story to my literature teacher back in the day lol
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Logan x Reader pt.2
So I truly didn't think that many people would like this but thank y'all so much, genuinely
The reader is unfortunately no longer GN, they are referred to as 'mom' but otherwise fairly neutral
There is blood/sort of self harm imagery in this one but it ISNT SELF HARM I promise! Make sure you only read if you're comfortable though!!!
<< Part 1 Part 3 >> Masterlist
Waking up next to him was pretty surreal. Mostly because of how relaxing it actually was. His chest pillowed your head and one of his arms was around your back, playing with your hair. He smelt fucking amazing.
You lifted your head and looked down at him, images of last night flashing behind your eyes. It had actually been pretty funny to begin with, neither of you could work out how to get the other out of their suits, ending in you both giggling and undressing yourselves. He was out of his suit lightning quick - you're surprised it is still intact - and immediately found his way back to you. Kissing your neck and you struggled to remove your shoes.
“I promise this isn't some elaborate plot to turn you off.” You laughed as your foot was finally free of the blasted shoe.
He merely hummed, breath fanning your neck as he slowly bit down. Your brain short-circuited and it took a full shaky breath for you to be back in the room and removing the spandex.
His face was calm, relaxed, and he gifted you a small smile.
“Hey.”
You grinned back. “Hi.”
“It's still pretty early.” He wiggled his brows.
Your cheeks warmed and, in a move that probably wasn't wise, you hid your face in his chest. “No. We have to get ready.”
His chest rumbled with his chuckle and you groaned, placing playful kisses on his pecs.
“C’mon, baby.” He pulled you up to his lips and kissed you slow. Taking his time with a leisurely pace.
You kissed him back before nipping his bottom lip, knowing it would drive him crazy, and pulling back. “Stop." Kiss. "It's a big day." Kiss. "I gotta make sure Laura eats.”
Confusion splattered across his features but he slowly released you. A fact that you were grateful for because you don't think you could've rebuked him another time.
You eased yourself up, still a little sleepy and a little sore before stretching fully. His eyes watched your naked body shamelessly and you turned to locate your suit.
“What is that?” His expression was stony.
You turned around to catch what he had seen and couldn't find anything. “Was it a spider or something?”
“No, what is that?” He pointed at you.
There better not be a fucking spider on me. You looked down, scared, to see nothing. Just yourself, naked as the day you were born. “I'm still confused.”
“That fucking scar on your back."
Ah.
Shit.
He hadn't seen it last night because he had you laid on your back for the majority of it.
“Oh. That scar.” You played it off. “It's nothing real-”
“Did I do that?”
“No. It wasn't you.” You bit your cheek. “It was a version of you.”
“Wh-”
“Lo.” You stopped him before he could spiral, placing a hand on his cheek. “Nothing happened that I couldn't handle. He just got lucky and unlike you I can't heal everything so unfortunately I have claw marks. But I am alive and safe and you are not to blame.”
He looked like he was about to argue but a knock at the door stopped that.
“Guys, are ya decent?” Wade asked in a sing-song voice.
Not really. “You okay?” You called back.
“Yeah, I'm here to tell you to hurry up because Maya doesn't know how to end this part.”
Who the fuck was Maya? “O-okay?”
“See ya soon!”
Logan didn't look like he wanted to move. He was content with staying here and blaming himself for something that he didn't do.
“Look, Logan, if he is awake they all are. It's time to go.”
He had to agree with you there.
~~
Logan entered the main living space and was unsurprised to see everyone else there. Gambit was sitting with Elektra talking strategy, Blade was kneeling spinning his weapon and psyching himself up, Deadpool copying every move he made and you were braiding Laura's hair.
“At least they won't be able to grab your hair, lovely.” You kissed her crown as you finished, tying it off with a small piece of fabric. She smiled and scooped a handful of dry cereal into her mouth. “Make sure you have some fruit, please.” The girl rolled her eyes but did take a piece of fruit from the can by your feet. “Good girl.”
Laura would never tell anyone but she loved praise from you. You were her favourite person and for you to tell her she was doing good meant the world. She liked to be strong and fierce but secretly she loved when you babied her.
“You her mom or something?” Logan asked. He didn't mean for it to sound so insulting. Every set of eyes turned to him, their judgement sitting heavily on his shoulders.
Wade even piped up, “What in the ever loving fuck?”
You looked up shocked and a little embarrassed. “No, of course not. But it's good to keep her safe and s-she needs a balanced diet, so I try to... provide one.” Oh, god. You sounded crazy. Your gaze fell to Laura who was staring right back at you. “Sorry. I guess I have been acting like your.. I know you have parents and I know I'm not- I’m sorry.”
“I don't have any parents.” She clarified.
That didn't hurt, per se, but it didn't feel good.
“‘course you do.” El called over. “She just braided your hair.”
Laura smiled and leant further into you, you hugged her back and handed the can of fruit to her. “Have you packed your things?”
“Yeah.” She nodded. Her ‘things’ were her comics and a pair of sunglasses. The light was far too bright for her eyes and they were a blessing in this wasteland.
“That's good.” You smiled as she stood up and walked through Wolverine, clipping his shoulder with her own.
Gambit asked Laura to help him in the other room. Everyone in your party knew it was a distraction so that Blade could feed. It was your turn and you knew it would go over swimmingly with the man that just insulted you.
“I didn't mean-”
“It's fine.” You stood and made your way over to the Daywalker. “You ready?”
“I hate this.” He clasped your arm and you helped him to his feet.
Wade reached his arm out and you obliged, pulling him up too. He bounced happily on his toes and hugged you. “You can be my mom any time.”
“Sure thing.” You chuckled.
“Where are you going?” Logan asked. He was just stood awkwardly where he had stopped in front of you and Laura.
“To feed Blade.”
“Feed him?”
Blade sneered, revealing his fangs. “I used to have a friend that helped my hunger. Now I'm here.”
“We all pitch in.” Elektra continued. ���Take turns.”
Wade fanned himself, “he bites you? Kinky bitch.”
“No,” You shook your head. “I cut myself and pour an amount into a glass, we have a measuring line. It's a very well thought out system.”
“Cut yourself.” Logan's stony expression hadn't quite left from earlier but was back in full force now.
“It might sound strange to you but it's a good system.” You defended it. “We try to shield little Laura, we all take turns, it's fair. The only victim is Blade! He hates it!”
Blade, who had stayed quiet, nodded. He was embarrassed to ask anything like this, he hated that he was a Dhampir. His mother had died because of a selfish Vampire and said being cursed him, he swore to rid the world of them and here he was. No better than those he hunted.
“I'll do it.” Logan volunteered. “I heal so I'll do it.”
“You don't have t-”
“I'll do it.” He was firm but then spoke lowly. “I don't want any more scars on you.”
You sighed but agreed, half hating and half loving him.
“Come on then.” You ushered them both into the makeshift kitchen.
Deadpool followed watching with wide eyes.
Blade hung back as you got the glass, it had been scratched halfway to indicate the measurement.
“That's a lot of blood.” Logan's tone was accusatory.
“Every other day.” Blade informed, emotionless.
Logan was quick to yank off a glove and cut a quick slice on his hand. The hand had so many veins that he was sure it would take seconds to fill the cup. Except, he healed before he could fill it a quarter of the way.
He repeated his actions and the cut seemed to heal faster.
“This is embarrassing.” Wade ‘whispered’.
“Shut up.” Logan growled as he did it again and finally got just under the mark. “Is that enough?”
“Not quite-”
Blade agreed to stop this painful display. “It'll do.”
“Blade, we have a big fight coming up, you'll need all your strength.”
“It's okay, I'll be good.” He picked the glass up and took long thick swallows, hating that the taste was good. That it itched the scratch in the back of his head.
“So if he's a Vampire why can he go out in sunlight?” Deadpool asked whilst Blade licked his lips.
“Daywalker.. he can handle light.” You recalled something, “actually did you know that Dracula could as well? Sunlight didn't kill him, it just weakened him.”
Blade set the glass down, “I killed that mother fucker.”
“Dracula?”
“Yeah.”
“He's real?”
“Real as the stake I shoved into his heart.”
You were in complete shock. “Are you being serious? For real life? This… this is mind-blowing.”
Wade shrugged. “I dunno, I'm pretty sure in that comic he comes back to life.”
“Comic?” Blade raised a brow.
“Yeah keep up, sweety, this is a bunch of nerd comics thrust together with you included.” Deadpool pointed at you.
~~
You'd never seen a fully grown man scream ‘shotgun’ and sprint to the side of a car. Yet, here he was, shoving Gambit to the side and opening the door of a beat up Honda.
Wade rolled down the window and explained, “I'm not driving but I am a passenger princess.”
“I guess, I'll drive.” Elektra shrugged and there were no objections. She was probably the most logical of all of you, she could handle his outbursts and tune him out. She had done that to Daredevil for years apparently.
Laura, Gambit and Blade were next in the car, the latter sandwiched in between the others, they say in the middle row as the back row had been destroyed. You smiled at Laura leaning against Blade.
“Y/N.” Logan gestured to the open boot. Oh, right. Yeah. You'd have to get in the boot. With Logan. The man that had been cold towards you today. Great.
You shuffled into the car and settled your backpack next to you, he got in behind you and you were both just sitting facing each other. Knees meeting.
You busied yourself with your backpack, handing Laura her sunglasses. She had them on her head and placed them down for a second, forgetting them. Luckily you picked them up for her.
“There you go, hun.”
She blushed and took them happily. “Thank you.”
“You're welcome.”
After that there was nothing else to do. You had no distractions.
Wade had put the radio on as El had pulled away from your home. This might be the last time you ever saw it. It was actually a little bit sad. You all might never be back here. Or all but one could be, you hated that thought. It was bad enough Johnny being dead - and he was fairly annoying - you couldn't handle anyone else. Were you going to cry? No. You weren't. You were fine. Everyone would be fine.
You sniffed just as Britney Spears started singing and Gambit and Wade put on a terrific performance.
"I think I did it again."
“You look tired.” Logan whispered, the others wouldn't hear him over the duet.
“Do I?” You frowned. What had you done to him this morning? “Way to make a girl feel special.”
“No I mean.” He sighed. “Have a nap. It's a long journey.”
“There's not an abundance of space.” You gestured to each other.
Logan manoeuvred and motioned for you to move with him, you were wary but did as he asked and ended up in a very comfortable position. It mirrored how you had awoken this morning, resting on his chest, except you were both closer. If that was possible.
To be comfortable he pulled your leg over his, leaving the other straight, and wrapped both arms around your sides.
“I'm sorry I've been a dick.” He whispered against your hair. “I- The scar set me off this morning and everything I've done since I can't explain. I don't know why I've been an asshole. I jus-I haven't meant to be it's just come out like that.”
“It's alright.” You raised one shoulder in a half shrug. Your Logan had explained once that sometimes he says something and between his brain and his mouth it was as though it went through an 'asshole filter'. He truly didn't mean to be a dickhead but he couldn't help it. He usually felt horrible when it happened.
“No it isn't-”
You placed your hand on his lips, “yes it is. Now shush let me sleep. I was up practically all night.”
At least that got you an amused huff.
Part 3
#logan howlett#logan 2017#logan x reader#logan#james logan howlett#deadpool 3#deadpool#deadpool and wolverine#wolverine#the wolverine#wolverine x reader#xmen#logan xmen#wolverine x men
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