#I'm not saying that Gabi is innocent

[keischreiber]

I love it when characters realize their mistakes and apologize.

Because there is nothing wrong with admitting that you are at fault when you realize that you have been mistaken.

[httpiastri]

more than enough – jmm21

you hate your birthday, but pepe is determined to change your mind.

genre: fluff/a little angsty/comfort

pairing: reader x college!pepe marti, ft christian mansell and sebastian montoya

warnings: uhhh anxiety and such ?? idk

word count: 2.6k

author's note: just like last year, this is merely a very self-indulgent birthday gift to myself (and a bit of a late birthday gift for a friend on here who confided in me about not liking their birthday either), so sorry if you don't relate but i needed to write this for myself despite how painful it was. not happy with how it turned out but, i had to get it out of my system. <3 (also not proofread because i will freak out likely aaaaa)

this is mostly a standalone fic but ig it kinda works as college!pepe so i put that there. i got this idea at my mom's birthday back in march but never actually wrote it until this last week... also loosely based on a tiktok that really spoke to me.

also! this doesn't really work with the headcanon of pepe, seb and chris all sharing an apartment, but i wanted it this way. i also wasn't comfortable including gaby or hermes, so i used the names nora and emma for seb's and chris's respective gfs. :)

"why didn't you tell me your birthday is next week?"

the question is innocent enough, only borderline accusing, but something tightens in your stomach nonetheless. you don't look up from the pot in your hand, however, instead continuing to scrub it with your dishbrush like it's no big deal. "who told you that?"

pepe chuckles as he makes his way over to your side, leaning against the counter as he looks at you. "emma," he tells you, crossing his arms over his chest. "going to answer my question now?"

"i must've forgotten to tell you."

"oh, come on..." your boyfriend shakes his head. "is there a reason i wasn't allowed to know? did i do something? do you not trust me? am i-"

"pepe," you say, his name followed by a sigh as you look over to him in hopes of stopping his rambling. "it's nothing personal."

"what is it, then?" he presses, eyes following your hands as they begin to rinse the pot he'd cooked your pasta in just a couple hours ago. "why don't you want to tell me?"

you take a deep breath, shrugging your shoulders before turning off the tap. "i just... i'm not a big fan of my birthday."

the biggest understatement of the year.

you hate your birthday.

for a number of reasons, really. some to do with your family and childhood; many to do with your own inner thoughts and feelings.

you hate how it reminds you of every bad birthday you had as a kid. you hate how it makes you hopeful that people will remember and congratulate you, because you hate how painful it is when they don't. you hate how you always get reminded of how little people seem to care, and how they always prioritize themselves even on what's supposed to be your day.

it's too much of a mess to explain to him right now – maybe, hopefully, one day you'll have the energy and courage to go through it all.

you hadn't forgotten to tell pepe; you had just been silently hoping he wouldn't address it, and that everyone else would forget, too. but apparently, you have a snitch in your friend group. "what do you mean?" pepe asks.

"i'd much rather not celebrate it." you place the pot on the drying rack, wiping your hands on your towel hanging by the stove before turning to him. "a lot of stuff regarding my birthday just makes me really upset. if i could, i'd just... make it disappear, honestly."

your eyes flicker to the floor, fingers nervously fiddling with the sleeve of your shirt. he can tell you don't want to get into it, and he won't push you. instead, he opens his arms wide, taking a step forward. you accept the offer instantly, arms wrapping around his waist as he pulls you close.

the air in your little dorm room isn't as thick as you had expected it to be when telling him all of this – but at the same time, you aren't surprised. pepe has always had a way of grounding you, making everything seem a bit easier. "i can't make it completely disappear, i think," he says, placing his chin on top of your head. "but i can pretend for you."

you hum contently, letting your eyes close for a few moments. "that would be great."

he remains quiet for a couple of seconds, but then he can't stop himself from talking again. "do you really not want anything? no party? you threw me that party for my birthday, i'd feel guilty not doing anything back."

"i did it because you had a fun time and you like those things, and because i enjoyed planning it. but i was really hoping i could skip all that," you answer, pulling away ever so slightly to look up at him with a sheepish expression. "i would honestly rather have dinner with you, emma, nora, sebas, chris... maybe get some takeout from that new indian place down the road?"

to pepe's ears, you sound more than just a tiny bit crazy – but your being so different from him is one of the things that attracted him in the first place. he nods, leaning in to press a kiss to your forehead. "whatever you say, love."

"where did your girl go?" emma asks the second pepe slumps into a free seat by the cafeteria table.

your boyfriend shoots a glance over his shoulder back to the serving line before setting his plate down. "they were out of rice so she's just waiting for a new batch," he says with a shrug.

"okay then, let's be quick before she gets here," emma speaks up again. "what are we doing for her birthday? it's just a few days away, but i think we can pull something off."

"me and seb were talking about throwing her a surprise party," nora says, looking over at sebastian who's nodding excitedly.

pepe, however, lets out a dismissive sound and swats the air with his hand. "no, forget about that," he says, stuffing a spoonful of pasta into his mouth. "she doesn't want any of that."

nora snorts. "what? of course she does."

"you know, pepe," emma counters, eyebrows raised at the spaniard. "every girl will tell you that she doesn't want a surprise party. don't bother, i don't care, you don't have to do all that for me! but in reality, we're all secretly craving it."

pepe considers her words for a few moments; maybe there is some truth in them after all. maybe all you did was try to act modest, to put the idea in his head so he would make the right choice.

but you weren't the one to bring up the subject – he was. he remembers clearly how you were doing your very best to avoid talking about your birthday at all, and the memory of how tough of a subject it seemed like to you is still etched into his mind. he thinks you were so brave to confide in him like that, and so he needs to stand up for you. he can't dishonor your trust.

"trust me, guys. she really doesn't want it." he ignores the groans of the people around him, taking a few sips of his water before continuing. "can't we all just grab some dinner on saturday instead? maybe that new indian place?"

"works for me," christian joins in. "how about presents, then?"

"right, are we all buying something together, or separate gifts?" emma fills in.

pepe shakes his head yet again. "i don't think she wants that, either." his words are followed by a long silence, which makes him unable to hold back a chuckle. "just paying for the food should be enough."

nora sighs dramatically, the palms of her hands pressing into the sides of her face. "and i'm supposed to just trust you, huh?" she asks and pepe merely shrugs, focusing back on his food. "hope you're not messing with us here, marti."

"i have no idea what he said, but he usually is," your voice spreads through the group as you finally take a seat at the table. "fill me in and i'll help you decide if he's just being annoying."

"i was just telling them about what mr. peterson said yesterday," pepe says quickly. "about what he'll do to everyone who fails the exam."

you throw your head back laughing, nodding instantly. "oh my god, that was hilarious. so, it started with someone on the front row asking about..."

pepe loves birthdays. his own, too, but mostly he finds himself looking forward to his friends' birthdays and longing to celebrate the important people in his life. he loves picking out gifts, planning celebrations, and making sure everything is perfect. it just comes naturally for him to be caring and detailed in that way.

but while pepe eagerly awaits your birthday, you couldn't even come close to feeling the same way.

most years, you spend the weeks leading up to your birthday dreading it, and the day of your birthday crying, because your birthday reminds you of everything you try to forget year-round.

pepe wants to make the day perfect for you, but he also obviously doesn't want to do too much. it's a hard task, but he's set on making it work – and the first step is getting a cake.

his first thought was to get you something huge, something to properly convey what he thinks you deserve and how much he loves you. though, it didn't take long for him to realize that something like that would be way too much for you. instead, he settled on a more basic yellow cake with some kind of white coating that the lady in the bakery recommended to him, and dropped by the grocery store near campus to buy sprinkles and a bunch of candles.

the end product is a little messy, but created with so much love, and pepe knows you're going to adore it. what he doesn't know is how he managed to keep you away from his refrigerator and the surprise hiding in it all night yesterday, but it doesn't matter – all that matters is that you're currently still sleeping soundlessly in his bed, with no clue of what's going on over in the kitchen.

pepe's hands are trembling slightly as he lights up the candles; he is a little nervous, he will admit, but he's also excited at the same time. he can't wait to see the look of surprise on your face, so he hurries up and places the cake on a tray along with two cups of coffee.

he silently curses at the way his bedroom door creaks when he pushes it open with his foot, but thankfully you don't move a single muscle. he carefully scoots over to the side of the bed, sitting down next to you and balancing the tray in his lap. he reaches over with one hand to your cheek, thumb tracing along your skin, fingers settling under your jaw. "mi amor," he whispers, a soft hum leaving his lips as he watches your eyelids slowly flutter open. "happy birthday."

it takes a few moments for your eyes to adjust to the sunshine lighting up the room, but when they do, they can't help but focus on him. the goofy grin on his lips, the messy hair, the-

the cake on his lap.

you push yourself up to sit in bed, rubbing some sleep out of your eyes. you're mistaken, surely? you're still half-asleep, you must've imagined it...

but no amount of blinking makes the cake disappear. the little flames of the candles swaying in the air, the single drop of stearic rolling down the side of a candle, the rainbow sprinkles sticking to the top and sides of the cake – it's all very real.

pepe was so sure this was the right way to go. but seeing the tears begin to seep out of the corners of his eyes makes him horrified. he messed up.

he knew the sprinkles would be too much. and that amount of candles, what was he thinking? he definitely went overboard.

"oh my god," he says, instantly placing the tray on the bedside table before scooting closer to you. "i'm so so so sorry, i thought you would like it... i don't know what i was thinking. here, let me-"

you shake your head as he begins brushing away your tears with his thumbs, and to his big surprise, you chuckle. "don't be sorry," you say, letting out another laugh when you see the confused expression on his face. "i do like it. a lot." you reach up to take his hands in yours, bringing them down to the bed and intertwining your fingers. "it's just... very emotional, for me. as you can see."

he also chuckles now, and he thinks he understands – even though seeing your happy tears is more painful than he'd expected. "okay," he says with a nod. "so..." his eyes flicker back to the cake.

"yes, please. i mean, what could be better than a sugar rush first thing in the morning?"

pepe would've been so happy to shower you with presents to express how much he loves you; it would've made him so proud to invite all your friends to a big celebration, to show you how much you mean to all of them, to change your idea of a birthday. but this – sitting together in bed, eating straight from the cake (no plates needed), pressing sugary kisses to each other's cheeks – is another form of perfect.

he just hopes you think it's perfect, too.

hearing you tell the stories of how you needed to bake the cake for yourself if you wanted one as a child, how you always made sure to buy yourself a gift because the risk that no one else would get you one was too high, and how you always needed to plan out your own parties breaks his heart – but hearing you open up like that also means the world to him. he understands that it's all buried so deep inside of you, but there's nothing he wants more than to help you heal and to prove that you can have much better and bigger birthdays than that.

but for now, a little cake in bed and a ton of kisses will have to do.

baby steps.

"chris, will you pass me the chicken korma?"

he leans over the crowded couch table and holds out the takeaway box to nora, who takes it into her hands and thanks him. "that one is really good," you tell her through your mouthful of bread, nodding to your friend.

"what's the verdict, then?" sebastian asks from his seat over on the couch. "i need a rating from the birthday girl, one to ten."

"food? ten," you say, taking a sip of your soda. "company? ten."

birthday? eleven.

the whole day has been much better than you'd expected; from your wake-up this morning, to the lunch date you shared with pepe over in town after a cute walk along the river, to having your closest friends all gathered in your living room for you. you don't even mind the way your buttcheeks are already starting to hurt after sitting on the floor for too long – you knew you should've invested in more seating for moments like these – because all of this is worth it.

"agreed," pepe chimes in from next to you. "especially about the food."

"speaking of which," says emma. "was there any bread left?"

you're quick to jump to your feet, already turning towards the kitchen. "garlic or plain?"

"ooh, garlic! thank you!"

pepe hurries off the floor right after you, making up some excuse about getting a new spoon for one of the sauces, but no one even bats an eye. you hear him enter through the door, and you smile instinctively. "how are you feeling?" he asks when he reaches your side, hand finding the small of your back as you rummage through the takeaway bag. "is this all enough?"

"it's more than enough. so much more." after pulling out the garlic naan from the bag, you reach up to the side of his face with your free hand, brushing your thumb over his cheekbone. "best birthday ever."

you seal your words with a feather-light kiss to his lips, and he's still smiling when you pull away. "you promise?" he asks, eyes searching through yours for any slightest hint of insincerity or uncertainty.

"i promise." another kiss, followed by a gentle hum, and he visibly relaxes. "thank you."

"no, thank you." for opening up, for letting him do all this for you. for existing. "only happy birthdays from now on, okay? i will make sure of it."

"it could never be anything other than a happy birthday with you around."

[feyhunter78]

PLEASE UPDATE IM BEGGING THIS IS MY BRAND NEW LIFE SOURCE RN

I'm gonna assume this is about Pink Pastels, and gladly give you what you're asking for👀

Pink Pastels Pt 6

Description: It's time for Gabi's field trip, and wouldn't ya know, you and Miguel are in the same group.

Pt 7

Miguel’s never been a chaperone before. During Gabi’s Kindergarten field trip he was away on a business trip, but this time he made sure to be there, not just because Gabi’s class was going to the zoo, and she loves the zoo, but because of you.

There’s this need to protect you, like an itch beneath his skin. He can’t forget the look of fear on your beautiful face, or the way you clung so tightly to him, desperate and terrified. The crunch of that man’s bones beneath his fists, the fear that ran through your attacker as Miguel tore into him, talons and fangs covered in his blood, crimson drip, drip, dripping down to the pavement below, it was an almost ecstasy.

Your broken and discarded shoes are hidden in the back of his closet, along with your hairband. It’s pathetic, really, the makeshift shrine that’s beginning to form, and he knows that his actions could so easily borderline being creepy, but you’re his. He knows it. You’re meant to be together, and he’s simply showing his devotion.

“Papá, Papá, we’re here.” Gabi tugs on his shirt sleeve, her face lit up with pure, innocent excitement, and he resists the urge to crush her to his chest and never let her go.

“I see, where do you want to go first, Mija?” He asks, adjusting her baseball cap and making sure it’s snug on her head. He doesn’t want her face to get sunburned, but she hates the feeling of sunscreen, so they compromised.

“I want to see the hippos!” She says, bouncing in her seat as she turns to talk with her friends behind her, little, high-pitched voices discussing and debating which animals were the best.

“Mr. O’Hara, here’s your map, and safety packet. I trust you went over the info online ahead of time?” You hand him a manila envelope, smiling brightly at him.

Your hair is down today, the crown of your head covered by a white bucket hat, and you’re wearing jeans with a sage green T-shirt that reads SRE Field trip, in big white block letters. He’s wearing the same, everyone is, to ensure if a child is lost, they can be easily returned to their group.

He takes the packet from you, nodding. “Of course, can’t leave my chaperone partner to do all the heavy lifting.”

You laugh a little at that and continue down the bus aisle, handing out the remaining packets.

He lets Gabi pull him off the bus and is soon swarmed by five first-graders, each one a friend of Gabi’s—she makes friends so easily, something he can’t take credit for.

“Okay everyone has their groups, please stay with your chaperone, and your buddy, don’t go wandering off, and meet back here, at the entrance at three o’clock.” An older teacher says, before she gathers her own group and heads through the zoo gates.

You bend down to face the kids, an excited smile on your face. “Alright, what animal are we seeing first?”

“Hippo!”

“Lion!”

“Monkeys!”

“Seals!”

A chorus of answers rings out, and you turn to Miguel. “Mr. O’Hara? Do you have any suggestions?”

You look so pretty, the sun shining down on you, the casual outfit, the way you tap your finger against your lips in thought, clearly putting on a show for the kids. If he ignores all the others and focuses on only you and Gabi, he can almost imagine this is a family outing, not a field trip.

“Last time I was here, they had snow leopards?” He feigns ignorance, but when your face lights up, he feels that intoxicating shot of dopamine.

Snow leopards are your favorite animal, the one you’ve voiced your desire to go see many times while in the school’s teacher’s lounge. One which has cameras, that Miguel has access to. Obviously.

“They still do, they’re my favorites.” You confirm what he already knows, and the children immediately change their answer to match yours.

“Why don’t we go there first, then if the kids see any animals, they want to visit on the way there we’ll see them afterwards?” He suggests, still acting oh so innocent.

“What do we think? Everyone agrees with Mr. O’Hara?” You ask the children, straightening up and throwing him a smile when they all agree to his plan.

Miguel stands back behind you and the children, watching as you join them up at the glass, helping them read out the informational signs, and marveling over the big cats.

The environment set up for the leopards is lush, full of greenery and stone. Perches and outcroppings meant to mimic their homelands, and mounds of snow that they seem to disappear into, reappearing with a flash, causing Gabi and her friends to jump back in surprise then burst into giggles.

You soon join him, your arms tucked behind your back as you watch your students. “I think this is one of my favorite days of the year. I know it’s stressful, and tiring but seeing how excited they all are, just really makes me happy.”

“Gabi loves the zoo, we come here every year on her birthday.” He tells you, desperate to include you in their life, if only through shared pieces of personal information. “I’ve got all the photos in my office, my coworkers’ joke that by the time I retire I’ll have half my office wall covered.”

“I used to go to the aquarium when I was a kid, there’s something about standing underneath those giant tanks, with the way the light plays through the water—it’s breathtaking.”

You’re breathtaking. He wants to say, but he doesn’t. Instead, he says, “I know the feeling.”

You smile shyly at him, and for a moment he’s back on the side of your building, watching you through your window. He didn’t intend to be there, to watch you, he only wanted to ensure you were okay. You were fast asleep, hair askew, in a soft looking oversized t-shirt, the moonlight dancing across your peaceful face.

He couldn’t tear himself away, enraptured by the sight.

You let out a huff, and in his peripheral, he spies the name on your phone. Todd.

He hates Todd.

“Everything okay?” He asks carefully, his eyes on Gabi.

“Yes, sorry, just some personal issues, nothing serious.” You say quickly, sliding your phone into your pocket.

“Ms. Y/N, can we go see the hippos now?” One of Gabi’s friends, Emma, comes up to you, looking up at you with big blue eyes, her hand tugging at your shirt.

“Is that what everyone else wants to see?” You ask, gaze sweeping over the other children.

“Yes.” Emma says confidently, running off in the direction of the large animals, Gabi following closely behind.

“Girls!” You call out, looking from them to the others.

“Go, I’ll bring the others.” He reassures you.

You take off after them, and he gathers the remaining four children, who huddle around him like ducklings.

“Is Ms. Y/N mad? She looked mad.” One of the little boys—Tony, named after the Avenger or a family member, Miguel isn’t sure—asks him, chewing on his bottom lip.

This is that Tony, Gabi’s told him about this boy, how he’s very nice, and funny, but gets scared easily. She likes him, maybe not in a way she yet understands, or that Miguel is ready for, but if his baby girl has to have a crush on anyone, an easily scared little boy isn’t the worst.

“She’s probably mad at her dumbass boyfriend.” Dahlia, a girl he can tell is from the Bronx by her thick accent, speaks up, and it’s all he can do to keep from laughing at the scandalized look on Tony’s face.

“Don’t tell Ms. Y/N I said a bad word, but that’s what I’ve heard Ms. Melissa call him.” She says quietly when she sees Tony’s face.

“I won’t tell if you won’t.” He promises.

“Gabi’s right, you are the coolest.” Dahlia says, grabbing his hand and swinging it back and forth as they walked.

The coolest? He wanted to run ahead and scoop his daughter into his arms, she thought he was the coolest.

Tag list: @nyctophilic0vitnir, @miggyoharaswife, @badbishsblog, @imisshim2much, @wanderlustingcastaway, @lynn-9703, @sleepyamaya, @erensbbg, @sweetea85, @ilovemiguelohara, @natthernandez, @stxrrielle, @ihateuguys, @jenniferdixon05207, @blep-23, @luvisaaxoxo, @minimari415, @emerald-09, @violet-19999, @kenchosaikuo, @groovycass, @youcantseem3, @lovefks, @nightshxdex, @dusstory, @aesniri, @munsonssecretblog, @kirke-is-my-name, @starbearieee, @chatoicboy, @act1839, @needsleep3000, @totally-not-georgia

[sonofthesaiyans]

Sasha's Finest Hour...

This is perhaps the only episode of Attack on Titan I would willingly watch if I were to sit down and put it back on.

"I'm Home".

Way back in the early days of season two.

Doesn't matter how much time has passed since the finale, my love and appreciation for Sasha has never wavered. And this episode here, where she showed us what she was truly made of should have been the start of much greater things for our legendary Potato Girl.

Her courage in this episode cannot be overstated. Armed with nothing but a bow and arrow, she finally managed to cast aside her fear of the Titans to save her hometown, and in doing so she saved the girl who she'd later take in as her own sister. Sasha has always been one of the most noble characters on the show, and nowhere is that clearer than in the moment she stays behind to ensure Kaya's escape.

Her character growth in the span of a single season is nothing short of impressive. She went from the odd one out among the recruits to throwing herself in the clutches of these monsters all to save an innocent life, and LIVED to tell about it.

It's from that moment that Sasha went from a silly, self-indulgent farm girl into the kind of warrior the Scout Regiment needed.....And one who earned her right to wear the Wings of Freedom. Not many who can say they fought their way out of the arms of a Titan with only an arrow for self-defense.

Sasha proved she's much stronger than she appears, her sense of justice and her compassion for others is what makes her stand out among Eren's circle of friends. And it's moments like this episode that are why I believe so strongly that Sasha had the potential to rival even Mikasa as the main heroine of this story. She's a girl with no extraordinary superhuman abilities, just a strong will to live and to stand with those who need her the most.

And we FULLY DESERVED to see a whole lot more of what this episode promised than what we ultimately got. We deserved to see more of Sasha becoming the big sister figure she was to Kaya. We deserved to see more of her with her father who was so proud of her, her mother who we NEVER saw share even a single scene with Sasha....with Mikasa her supposed close friend and roommate, with Niccolo the man who abandoned his prejudiced mindset because of her....with freaking Eren who she had once trusted.....And YES, even with the Gabi Braun, who could have learned much from Sasha without the story taking the extreme turn it did on the heels of Sasha's incredible growth......

....And Hajime Isayama owes us DEARLY for denying us all of the potential laid out by this episode.

This episode offered so much towards one character, and it could have gone even farther. Even without outright killing a Titan, something else we absolutely deserved to see at least once, this was Sasha's proudest moment. We needed more episodes/chapters like this where Sasha could show what she was truly made of.

Sasha Braus, truly the most noble of them all. ❤️ ⚔️ 🥔 ⚔️ ❤️

And with that said, "I'm Home" is also the one episode where my other favorite gal, the too often overlooked Lynne gets her introduction.

Definitely another gal for whom this episode should absolutely have been the start of something much greater.

May be weird that I feel such a strong attachment to a character who was not long for this series, but Lynne still left her mark on me. Like Sasha she is beautiful, compassionate, and rock solid in the face of danger, striking back with the same ferocity as the Titans who are constantly on the attack.

She's a capable member of Squad Miche, and her kindness and care towards Conny and the other members of the 104th make me wonder what kind of relationship she would have had with the main squad if she had been given that chance. No doubt she'd have been a force to be reckoned with, and a force to keep up with, given her gallant stand at Castle Utgard.

Truly a character who deserves a second chance to shine. And this episode gave us a great introduction to what could have been. But once again, we were robbed of that by an author who never acts on the potential he puts onscreen. But that hasn't stopped me from exploring what she could have been, what her story might've looked like, and giving her the spotlight she's overdue for.

Remember her face, because she deserves that much. Lynne earned her Wings of Freedom. ❤️ ⚔️ ❤️

Long story short, this is the one episode of Attack on Titan I'd put on if I were to do so again. This episode gave us much, and it should have been the foundation for far more than what ultimately ended up being.

Two great characters, both who richly deserved so much better.

And that's not all I have to say about this episode, guys. We'll be back on this one soon enough, so stay tuned.

[diadianne]

Post-war Levi ramble + just thoughts in general

I've never posted on Tumblr, so forgive me if this looks weirdly formatted. These are just my thoughts after seeing the little interview Isayama did.

This was mostly sparked by the answer that the Ackermans lost their power, which is somewhat of a bummer to me, but I understand why it happened. I just dislike it when characters lose their powers at the end. Let me clarify: This is not a critique of the show because this show has literally been my obsession for the past year, lol.

Anyway, I got inspired to write this because I saw some people saying that the Ackermans were free from their powers and could be normal humans and therefore happier. I disagree with this because of my opinions on AOT post-war/rumbling.

I do not think Levi lived a happy life post-war/rumbling.

Mental Health

I've had a huge interest in mental health (for whatever reason) since I was younger and, with my past obsession (Modern Warfare II), I got really into learning about veterans, PTSD, etc. I've given presentations and done a lot of research on the topic. But, even without that knowledge, it's very easy to see that Levi has lived a very difficult life, to put it nicely.

I struggle to think that any of the remaining scouts (+ Annie) lived a decent life after. I can hardly imagine the guilt everyone felt after the rumbling. Billions of people died. Not hundreds, not thousands, not millions, billions! Innocent people, children...

Genuinely, how could someone live with that?

Of course, they didn't do it themselves, but there still are some difficult feelings alongside Eren's actions. Someone who was once a comrade/friend.

Levi has completed his purpose. Everyone who fought for the Scouts, who gave their life for the cause, made it possible for this. For Eren to destroy 80% of humanity. Just kidding, but there has to be the question of "Was it worth it? Was all the death worth it?"

"I've saved Eren's life over and over. Many of my comrades died each time. And, this is where that belief has gotten me. It's like some awful joke. Just what was that hope did we look forward to? All that hardship leads to this farce?"

Levi is questioning it all after having his hand forced to kill more of his comrades who had been turned into Titans. Even without Eren being their "hope" anymore, there was a purpose to stop Eren, a purpose to get revenge for Erwin, a purpose to protect his friends/comrades, etc.

I suppose I'm just genuinely wondering how someone could live with that level of guilt and loss. He lost everyone that really knew him. I think it is nice he stays (or at least is not alone) with Gabi, Falco, and Onyankopon, but that will never be the same as Erwin or Hange.

He went from having such a hard, busy, and difficult life to that all being done with. I think as wonderful as it sounds, it is probably hard to cope with that change. There are no more distractions.

Loss of Powers

I think Levi prides himself on being useful and strong because he had to be his whole life. He was "taken care of" by Kenny for a bit. Kenny, as seen, was very power-hungry and I am certain he definitely pushed those ideas onto Levi. Not saying that Levi is power-hungry, but maybe it pushed him to value his strength a lot. He had to be strong.

"Stay in bed? If I lie down any longer, you shits are gonna forget all about me."

I am sure more scenes would give examples of this, but I am going to stick with this one. In short, I believe that Levi, who has always been valued for his strength, would have a difficult time living with his new "weakness," especially with his leg damaged, lack of eye, and two missing fingers.

Post-war Climate

Yeah, sure. "Peace." The ending shows that there were still tensions, therefore war, and then death. A repeating cycle of hate. I mean, killing 80% of humanity? It was 1000000% easier to call the Eldians devils. Now, those devils have no power or "threats" to keep others away. The tensions inside of Paradis must have been insane as well.

Even if the destruction of Paradis happened 80-100 years after the rumbling (I'm not sure of the actual time), I doubt with every fiber of my being that things were just "chill" after the rumbling.

So... no, I doubt he lived a peaceful life. A peaceful life where tensions are high with the remaining bits of humanity, the world, and many of its resources, culture, and history are destroyed, and he is unable to do anything about it.

As an American, I relate it to the experience of being a citizen. It genuinely feels like watching something go horribly wrong but you cannot do anything about it because you're too exhausted trying to keep yourself alive and well. But, this is a rant about post-war AOT so I'm not going to go into American politics/issues lol.

I shortened my thoughts a bit because I get way too into topics. I hope this doesn't come out jumbled and makes some sense. I definitely need to rewatch season 4 (I just keep stopping after three because it makes me sad lol).

I want Levi to live a peaceful and happy life, but, in my personal opinion, I do not believe he did or could. If he did, he definitely has the title of "Humanity's Strongest" for a reason.

[glaciertea]

~My Masterlist~

Here's a list of all the things I've written so far, or currently in progress!

Note: Certain fics will be exclusively on Ao3 and vice versa.

Here is my Ao3 Account ♡

More under the cut~

♡ = Fluff

♧ = Angst/Drama

☆ = Smut

◇ = Romance

○ = General

Longfics

♡ ♧Tales the Songs Weave☆◇ (completed)

Summary: Miguel O'Hara is a leader. A leader who doesn't let anyone or anything distract him from the tasks at hand.

He's focused, unwavering, and ruthless.

But what happens when he abruptly pulls away from his territory and wanders into an unknown playing field he hasn't faced in forever?

Many say love holds no bounds, but how much will he be willing to break for you?

Shortfics

♡♧Of Ribbons and Love○

Summary: All she wants is a Pokémon, and Miguel is a bit on edge about that. Yet, when they stumble upon a hurt Eevee out in the rain, one simply can't turn their back on an innocent creature.

So with that, Miguel and Gabi takes matter into their own hands.

☆A Night to Prove All☆

Summary: Miguel O'Hara has been watching you from across the way. He's curious about you.

He wants to know more about you.

He wants to show you that a certain act will lead to something more.

☆It's Our Paradise, and it's Our Warzone☆

Summary: Miguel helps you out with a daydream you've been having for awhile.

♡Tickets for Two☆ (completed)

Summary: Working the graveyard shift at a movie theater has its quirks. It's not the best thing, and it's not exactly the worst.

Well... There is one thing that keeps you staying at the job: the huge, gorgeous man who comes in every Thursday.

Fun Drabbles

☆Spiders are freaky deviants☆

☆Whoops☆

Note: I'm not as active on Tumblr. Ao3 is my go to, so I'll mostly be posted up there. But I will post things if I conjure up anything up in this brain ♡

[kit-williams]

Barn Anon. Decided to do a silly Gaby one.

Gabriel waits for his human to leave the apartment before turning his attention to the couch. A deep growl fills the air. Everything was fine until his human's birthday party. Then one of her friends went and gave her this... thing. His golden eyes darken as he eyes the offensive item.

At first he thought nothing of it. It was just a gift from a friend. Then his human started bringing and placing it around the house. Not all the time, but enough that he noticed. Again, he could put up with it. Then one day she placed it on her bed, on her pillows. For days he had been forced to watch attention that was once completely his would get occasionally directed to this thing. No more! Never again shall he be forced to share his human's attention in her own home!

Gabriel snarls as he effortlessly rips apart the fabric and stuffing falls out onto the floor. He huffs in dark satisfaction before cleaning up the evidence of the crime scene. He tosses the tattered remains of the innocent plush teddy bear into the trash bin.

I will respect your decision to make this one canon but god I can easily read this as him being a yandere but then again I'm a degenerate trying to survive off of writing only very little smut and little to no yanderes in a month

Note: finally getting to this after fluffuary. My thoughts have not changed

Husbandry Taglist: @egrets-not-regrets @liar-anubiass-blog

Gabriel just cooed as he should have seen how you had gotten upset about it being destroyed and sure it was an "accident" of his strength getting the better of him but the way you scolded him on how it was a gift from a friend. He saw you still upset with the drying wetness of your eyes as you fold your arms frowning at him. He fully knows what he did was wrong but he didn't want to admit that he got unreasonably jealous over a stuffed toy...

He pulls out the bear from behind his back repaired and cleaned from it sitting in the trash. His red eyes looking apologetically like the cute non threatening puppy that he was... and not the xeno killer and astarte killer that he was... no he was a sweet little angel.

You look at the bear looking at its "scar" as Gabriel tries to lighten your mood by saying, "While I might not be an apothecary I did manage to save him from being interred in a dreadnaught."

You give the bear a hug before opening your arms to your Gaby and giving your silly angel a hug as you whisper thank you to him and just hear him coo.

[that-darn-clown]

another ask before church, let's go:

so these are just some general thoughts on my beloved Charlie Emily in the Rewrite.

both of the twins are just like their dad, but in different ways.

Sammy is more quiet and aloof, but he can be a silly guy when he wants to. like Charlie and his father, he's interested in robotics and Maybe taking over the business someday. he's not good with emotions (his own and everyone else's), and he wants William dead (although he's certainly more...impulsive than Henry).

Charlie is calm, generally viewed as the one people go to for comfort (whether she's exactly prepared to or able to is another question entirely), as well as a guiding, leading figure. she's got a temper like her dad, though. if she's pissed, she retorts first and asks questions later.

as Henry says, it's in her nature to protect the innocent. she lifts people into her arms, and yet very few do the same for her.

like, i love the fanon thing of Charlie being pretty competent in her role as Soul Protector for the other children, but. i've always found the idea of Charlie just barely knowing what the fuck to do even funnier.

like, this kid just got murdered. she now has five more, potentially much younger kids that are also confused. okay, now it's six because Cassidy. like. sure, she'll help the best she can but That Doesn't Mean She Knows What She's Doing.

i like to imagine it's stuff like this:

"Okay, can we be a bit less murdery? Y'all can chill the fuck out-"

"Jesus fucking- Okay Gabi. Uncle Will's being a dumbass and murdering kids again, so we've gotta stop him from doing that, okay? Yeah I know, I know, you're tired, but I ain't doing this by myself and you're the only one up right now. No I'm not asking Cassidy for help with this-" (Charlie immediately pre-SAVE THEM)

"NEWSFLASH ASSHOLE: I'VE BEEN PROTECTING PEOPLE FROM YOUR BULLSHIT THE ENTIRE GODDAMN TIME!" (< talking to William post-SAVE THEM)

"Cassidy, I love you like a younger brother, you know that. Stop fucking murdering the nightguards, you're gonna get us in trouble and shut down again."

"Cassidy, I'm gonna turn around, and you better not be about to show me Alex's dead body- Why do I even fucking try at this point."

"Uncle Will, this is why you should've quit your bullshit. Because now you're dead and stuck inside your fursuit for the rest of time. Why are you treating that like a good thing the fuck-" (< not upset about the furry part. it's quite literally everything else that's fucked up to her)

"STOP TRYING TO KILL MY BROTHER, ASSHOLE-"

"STOP TRYING TO KILL YOUR SON, ASSHOLE-"

"Cassidy. Cass. Cassy. My little brother in a better universe. You can move on, you don't need to keep torturing your dad. I mean I get why you're doing this, but fucking Christ-"

and those are just a few examples of Charlie being very tired of this shit. give my girl a break, she needs one

Hahaha charlie just being so tired of this shit but. She loves these damn kids so by god she's getting their shit together

[wildemaven]

I will devour age gap fics, but it does kind of surprise me that age gap is SO popular for joel fics. Especially after watching the last of us (I haven't played the game so I can't speak to that), it really surprises me how often joel is written as being so into the whole young innocent girl type, because I think he would instantly think of Sarah and ellie and just go into dad mode (not daddy mode). But, like I said, I read and love it all, so no complaints!

As much as I love javi's protective side, I think he would be much more into defiling the beautiful, young, innocent girls, where Joel would be more like "okay sweetheart, let's get you a blanket to cover you up and keep you warm!"

I hope this doesn't come off as negative to people who write age gap fics, everyone here is so talented and I'm so thankful you all share your art with us!

Hi Anon! Thank you for sending this in!! I’m so glad you enjoy reading age gap specific fics, it’s always so awesome to find the things you enjoy within the fandom.

I definitely agree with you that, in my opinion, I don’t think Joel would go for a younger partner— so I shy away from fics that are written as such because I know that I won’t enjoy them, they’re not my jam.

But that’s not me saying that those who write them are wrong for doing it, they’re more than welcome to write and enjoy that for him— and I will write and enjoy him written in a different light. The two can totally exist at the same time.

I will respectfully disagree with you on Javi, I just don’t personally see that for him— but that’s totally okay if that’s how you do. I just think after everything he’s been through— especially with Gabi and Helena, he would be more inclined to gravitate towards something more serious— again, just my opinion. I also enjoy reading him as a soft and affectionate towards his partners and I like writing him as such. Circling back to what I mentioned above, that doesn’t mean others aren’t allowed to enjoy and write differently, it’s just not for me. I would also like to note, this isn’t me saying I’m right and you’re wrong, we just have different opinions on Javi and that’s okay.

I don’t think you’re being negative at all, you’re just stating your opinion and that’s totally okay to do so.

There’s always going to be age gap fics, as well as an audience who enjoys it. And then there’s also going to be those who choose to seek out the opposite so they can feel a similar joy in reading their favorite characters.

This is no way a knock at anyone who enjoys or writes age gaps.

Thanks so much for sending this in!

[madraleen]

Attack on Titan - Hajime Isayama Vol.30-31: An Emotional-Whiplash Commentary.

-for the record. usually when i read manga, i'm like, 'aww, i want to see how it ends, but also i don't, because characters might die and then it'll be over, and then i'll miss it UwU." with this one, i'm like, "PLEASE, PLEASE JUST GIVE ME ANSWERS AND LET IT END, I CAN'T TAKE THIS ANYMORE!" XD

-listen, i'm calling eren devil child for distancing reasons, for coping, don't show him all long-haired and beautifully drawn and emotional, i get soft

-LISTEN TO ARMIN, HE SPEAKS! FINALLY HE SPEAKS! HE STRATEGIZES!

-...i don't like seeing eren frightened. this devil child... i don't. i don't.

-JUSTICE FOR FALCO DAMMIT

-noooo :(((( they turned into titans

-MIKASA AND ARMIN ARE STILL SAVING YOUR ASS, YOU DEMON CHILD YOU!

-for real, it was to save falco? i thought galliard just happened to be there, wrong place wrong time

-i don't like seeing eren frightened, i don't, i don't

-FUCK YOU, EREN, JEAN AND CONNIE ARE SAVING YOU, EREN! ARE YOU SEEING THIS, EREN

-i know eren can't die like that, but heh. gabi.

-I DIDN'T NEED EREN'S CUT-OFF HEAD ON A SPREAD PANEL! CONTRARY TO APPEARANCES I DON'T ACTUALLY HATE HIM!

-eren. please. i don't know what i'm pleading for. just please.

-I CAN BREATHE! I CAN BREATHE AGAIN! EREN DOES NOT AGREE WITH EUTHANIZATION! NOW DO YOU HAVE A PLAN? or must i renounce you again

-FUCK YOU ZEKE, GRISHA LEARNED FROM HIS MISTAKES AND LOVED US!

-oooh okay. so owl DID say mikasa and armin, but didn't know what that meant.

-generally i don't vibe with timey-wimey stuff, but i'll go along with it, that's the least of my issues rn

-yeah, how much of the future do they know? and can they see THEIR memories? i mean. grisha saw eren's future. can eren see HIS future via grisha? 

-okay wait so, eren was able to influence grisha in the past because zeke brought eren into grisha's memories in the future? :O

-oh okay so eren did see his future through grisha

-devil child what do you mean by putting an end to this world, are we going to be okay

-mikasa's blushing her heart out at eren's 'what am i to you?' do you really need an answer, eren

-that spiky skeleton thing isn't devil child, right...? oh. it is. oh. oh boy. i regret not reading any spoilers. i regret everything. i suffer.

-armin once again being relatable, 'eren's on our side, he must be.'

-oh. and we're back to world destruction. hello devil child, i hoped you were gone, and yet. how do we stop eren from killing the entire world but paradis. how. h... DEVIL CHILD ARGH

-one brother was like, ‘i'll kill all of us’, the other brother is like ‘i'll kill everyone but us on this specific island.’

-but what was the point of seeing those refugees that made you cry, then?! what about the innocents, why destroy them? can't we talk

-okay, i'll give you that, it's amazing how at moments you side with... everyone, basically. like, now reiner is like 'eren is going to destroy the world' and it's like YES MAN DO SOMETHING

-i think eren sacrificed *his* humanity along with all of humanity to protect you all, jean

-bb armin, who cares if it provokes any conflict with any titan, eren controls the titans. is he not all-knowing though, why are his subjects attacking us

-yaaay, go gabi go! save kaya! save in general! just save!

-it's so funny that we've hit pause on the massacre and we're just focusing on interpersonal stories. like yes the world's being destroyed, but carry on

-i have the same question, gabi, can't eren turn titans into humans and vice versa

-well... eren yeager didn't NOT kill his own people...

-yes mikasa lil bb, think for yourself and shine, yeah? <3 but little bitch armin, you didn't have to phrase it like that

-oh. if even armin calls eren a lost cause...

-demon child trusted floch with the plan?! and not us?!

-Levi levi levi <3. well if he didn't die NOW, i doubt anything else will kill him, it'll be pointless for him to go out wounded and not in a fight... right?

-yeah, by the way, devil child, i don't think armin's ever been controlled by bertolt, i think he's been haunted by erwin's ghost all along

-if armin feeds himself to connie's mum and dies here, i'll kick a bitch

-GOOD BOY CONNIE, DAMN YOU ARMIN SCARING ME LIKE THAT

-annie with her face stuffed with food is so cuuuute

-HEHE NICE, HANGE, COMING IN WITH THE PLANS, HANGE NEVER DISAPPOINTS

-i mean, listen. the world's gone to shit, devil child is slaughtering everyone, and i must say i enjoy seeing the new allied teams of eldians, marleyans, volunteers, whatevers. like, this is BIGGER. this is bigger than all else, this is above nations.

-reiner must feel like he woke up to one of his nightmares

-yes, connie, save the world babies, go out there and be safe <3

-but okay, wait. if, as jean says, eren is doing all of that for them (which i don't doubt), WHY did he push them away? not entrusting them with the plan i can understand, but why was he actively a jerk?!

-holy shit attack on school castes with eren is such a jarring contrast that it gives me whiplash. but okay yes, with these new alliances and with eren's notable absence that fortunately keeps my rage and sadness levels in check, i'm feeling hopeful again

[keischreiber]

A reminder that Reiner's main goal to be a hero was not to save the world necessarily, but to be accepted by his parents. It's just... if saving the world is what it took to be accepted, he'll gladly undertake hell or high water just to be the hero that he felt would grant him the love, acknowledgement, and acceptance of the people meant everything to him.

So, you know, as I rewatch his scene with Eren during the start of W. Tybur's speech, I can't help but think about this. And how this could have added why he mentioned that he was a bad person. That it wasn't about the environment he grew up in... but that he was just a bad person. Because, if I factor in his desire, I can feel that at the back of his mind... his own selfishness was the reason why they are where they are now. Why so many was killed, why so many innocent people had to die.

It's not just about being brainwashed.

Because remember, he tell Eren that he just wanted to be a hero, he wanted to be respected. Which is true. And while he didn't say it out loud, making it seem like he wanted to be seen as a hero and respected by the majority, he does want the to be a hero to earn the respect of his mother.

Who never once (at this point at least because it was never shown, and based from her personality, probably never did) told him that she was proud of him for any reason. For coming back, for winning the war, for surviving, etc. The most that Reiner probably had in terms of acknowledgment from Karina would be two things: Him becoming a warrior candidate, and him being chosen as a Warrior.

When I think about how Reiner would have felt during his first meeting with his mom after being extracted from Paradis, I feel like crying. (My tears are very shallow for this man. He gets hurt in any way, I cry.) Because if you look at how he was acting when he told Karina he no longer has the Armored Titan... he looked so scared, even apprehensive about telling her, looked so expectant of rejection, looked so expectant of his mom's disappointment... that he couldn't even look her in the eye. This literally screamed to me that during the time he returned to Marley, his mother could have given him a look of disappointment or a lecture on how they had achieved nothing in those six years, threw him a bit of slack because they at least managed to bring back the Jaw. How horrified she must have looked when Reiner mentions that he might be stripped of the Armor. And despite how, she would not lash out at him, she would give him a look that reflects disappointment.

I still remember that scene where they come back from Liberio and Reiner's looking on at how happy his uncle and auntie were when Gabi came home safe, expressed how proud of her they were.

I feel like... during his entire stay in Marley after the extraction from Paradis, he has never been hugged by his mother.

Which is why, as much as majority of the fanbase dislike Karina (god, even TV Tropes had nothing good to say about her), I'm glad she made it out alive. Because it's her acceptance that truly cements Reiner's happiness. It's the one goal he worked so hard to achieve. IF she had died, Reiner will eventually learn to be happy, but there's always going to be a gap there that no one would ever be able to fill.

[neonwebs]

@wirwolff ᴄᴏɴᴛɪɴᴜᴇᴅ ꜰʀᴏᴍ ʜᴇʀᴇ

Honestly? I'm not sure.

Growing up, I wasn't very close with either of my parents. Mom could only stand me when we were both looking at a TV. I'm sure George only liked me because of the benefits that came with sending me to private school and the fact I was mean like him. I'm only close with Tyler when he wants me in on his plan to ruin innocent people's lives. I can't say I want to talk to anybody who predates any of them.

It's my first year back without Gabriella. Ever since I bought my suit here, I'd been coming back to Oaxaca to celebrate the holiday. Then when I found Gabi, I started bringing her with me. She ended up teaching me more about the holiday than I already knew. She was always so smart.

"This year, I'm hoping my daughter can see me." If she can. If there's anything left of her. "I want her to know I'm doing okay. I'm eating. I'm sleeping. That I'm sticking to my bedtime. That I'm talking to people. That I'm trying." Setting down a picture of her next to Jack's beads. Sighing through my nose seeing that picture again. I want her to know I'm doing everything I can to make things right.

"What about you?" Glancing down to his offering. "A friend?"

[gabriellereed]

'You know I think you're cute,'

Gabi's eyebrows tick upwards. There was no shortage of charming smiles from him, he'd made every effort to be a welcoming host the second her and Selene had crossed through the doorway.

But it was another thing to believe it— that Matty, with eyes like warm onyx, polished and perfect, who outshone everyone else in the penthouse with his smile alone — was interested in her like that.

At least at first. She felt that inkling seep into her when they'd held hands navigating the crowds of the party. Innocent enough, but it was a very physical thing, very sweet. And the way he promised not to leave her side. And the way he'd placed the tab on her tongue, eye contact crackling like a log falling in a fire— intimate, and she knew then he wasn't just hanging around to make Selene's best friend feel welcome.

'It's not really a secret I had to give away…'

"Maybe ... a girl just enjoys hearing it aloud."

Gabi hums at that, hums again at the alleged unfairness of this deal.

'What were you saying about my cute smile? My perfect hair?'

When Matty reaches for her hands, covers them with his own and brings them to rest upon her own hips, she watches fiercely, brows furrowed slightly. The back and forth. The touch. She was wholly absorbed in the moment, no longer wondering idly about Selene, about what emails she might have to send the next day.

"I wasn't saying." Gabi corrects.

"I wasn't saying anything about either of those things. Or... anything about your dimples... which are a very nice incentive to get you to smile." She gives a drawn-out sort of hum. "I didn't mention that I'm trying hard to keep my eyes on your face only."

Who said that! It hadn't been Gabi, obviously, because despite the jungle juice, despite the euphoric cloud this molly was carrying her on, she was trying to behave.

She really didn't need to tell Matty that she thought his abdomen was cut from marble, or that his neck was elegantly shaped in a way that would make an Armani model blush.

"I didn't say any of that, obviously, cause I can't let my guard down in case you dunk me again."

There's a little inhale. A biting of her lip, something sly and determined settling into her features. No, he wouldn't disarm her so easily! Matty wouldn't get her gazing into his eyes, looking at the depth of them, the warmth, the way the glow of the pool casts an aquamarine light against his brow. He wouldn't get he thinking about just how good he looks.

Gabi flexes her hands underneath Matty's, just for the sensation of it.

Gabi was laughing, smiling, looking very proud of herself. She was pulling away from him, but Matty couldn't help the gravity that pulled him toward her. He followed along. She sunk nearly beneath the water, smiling at him.

"You know I think you're cute," Matt replied. "It's not really a secret I had to give away…"

She closed the space beneath them slightly.

"Like I would never reveal to you that I think you have a really cute smile. Orrrr that you've got perfect hair."

Her admission (or non-admission) was encouragement that this was all working. The flirting was reciprocated. They were both interested.

"Seems kind of like an unfair deal. I'm over here calling you cute, and you're just … listing off the things you won't reveal."

Matt braced himself for the small splash of water that headed in his direction.

"We're gonna have to do something about these hands of yours," Matty warned. "They keep splashing me."

He pushed forward, found both of her hands beneath the water. He placed both of their hands over her waist, with Matty's on top.

"There. Now. What were you saying about my cute smile? My perfect hair?"

[saeransangel]

The Head and the Heart

Anonymous asked:

hiiii, first of all, i wanted to tell you that you’re an amazing writer and i’m so in love with all of your works 😭🤲🏻 !!! and secondly i would like to request something. okay so.. i’ve a little headcanon in my head for a while now, where connie’s s/o is a titan shifter. so i was wondering if u could write something where connie’s s/o wants to jump instead of armin to save his mother? thank you so much in advance and i hope u have a wonderful day <33

Canon Verse Connie x Reader

A/N: Hii I'm sorry it took me so long to get to this. I hope you like it:)

Summary: Y/N is a titan shifter and is fully prepared to sacrifice themselves to save Connie's mother so Falco can live.

CW: SEASON 4 SPOILERS, Angst, swearing, canon violence.

WC: 1.6k (not proofread yet)

When Connie first discovered you were a titan shifter, he was enthralled. He had so many questions for you. Why didn't you tell him? He was your boyfriend after all. Why did you keep this from him? But also, do you have any like... cool abilities?

Overall he was amazed that you were a titan shifter. He thought it was even cooler watching you fight side by side with him, crushing the Earth beneath your feet and always making sure to have his back. He always called you his personal bodyguard.

The entirety of your relationship with Connie, being a titan shifter was never an issue for him. Until today, that is.

Your heart was pounding out of your chest and you rode your horse alongside Armin. Gabi was holding onto you from behind, screaming and crying for Falco.

You could barely process everything that was happening. The world was going to shit after Eren threw it into absolute chaos. Falco now has the power of the Jaw Titan and Connie took it upon himself to kidnap Falco and use him to bring his mom back. You couldn't believe that he would do this. Of course, he missed his mother. Being in a relationship with Connie meant you knew everything about him. The good, the bad, and the ugly. So yes, he missed his mother and it was horrible what had happened to her. But killing a child? Innocent or not, Falco is a child. This wasn't right.

As the three of you approached the old, worn down house in the abandoned village, you saw Connie with Falco.

"Falco! Get away from him." Gabi screams.

You can see Connie jump and look back to see you and Armin riding up to him, fast.

"He's trying to feed you to the Titan!" Gabi yells out again.

You curse to yourself as Gabi blows your cover. You and Armin were going to try and be calm about this. Approach him with caution and talk him out of doing this.

Upon hearing this, Connie wraps an arm around Falco's neck, putting him in a choke hold. His blade was out, threatening that if you came any closer he wouldn't hesitate.

"Connie! Stop it!" Armin yells out, a panicked look in his eyes.

"Stay there! Stay back!" Connie hollers. His eyes shot daggers at you and the other two. You and Armin yank at the reigns of your horse and halt in your tracks.

"Connie, what are you doing?" You ask, trying to stay as calm as you could. The truth was, you were terrified. This was all too much. You and Connie had been through hell and back together, always staying by each other's side no matter what. You two always came back with the support from one another. But if he went through with this...you were afraid that this time he wouldn't be able to come back from the guilt.

"Shut up! I don't wanna hear from you! Don't say anything!" He screams, tightening his grip around Falco.

Armin falls quiet, trying to think of a way out of this that results in everyone alive.

"You wouldn't understand me. You're going to tell me to keep him alive, right?! That's why I should give up on my mom, right?!" Connie's voice was growing increasingly loud and shaky. It broke your heart to see him acting like this. "I'm sure someone as righteous as you wouldn't understand an idiot like me!"

"You're not an idiot, Con." You tried to say. "Just please, let him go and come back to me, okay?"

Come back to me.

That was something that you always said to him when he was having a hard time. If he was ever crying because he was feeling angry, sad, alone, or guilty, you would always be there rubbing his back, patting with his head, and whispering soothing words. "Come back to me."

He grimaced at the familiar expression. "Don't say that to me." He spits.

He then begins moving up the ladder with Falco in hand. No matter how much he squirmed, Falco couldn't escape Connie's grip.

Your face twisted in fear and panic. Armin looked at you with desperation. It's like his eyes were saying, "You have to do something. He'll only listen to you."

And then it hit you.

You deployed your ODM gear and flung yourself onto the beam that was directly overlooking the Titan's mouth. A cold sweat ran down your back. You clench your jaw tightly. You wanted to look at Connie with pleading eyes but you couldn't bring yourself to do it. It would make what you were about to do a lot harder.

You were going to jump.

"Hey! I said stay back!" Connie yelled again. You still refused to look up at him. You could hear his breath shaking even from where you stood. You began to panic more because it was starting to seem like he was catching on to what you were planning. "What are you planning to do?" He screamed. You stayed silent as hot tears streamed down your face. "Say something, Y/N!"

"You told me to shut up, didn't you?!" You yelled back. You forced yourself to look him in the eyes. Your heart dropped as soon as you made eye contact. He knew. "Did you really think I was going to let you do this?" You asked sadly.

Time slows down as you take the step off the beam, dropping yourself down. You closed your eyes to brace for the impact of the Titan's jaws crushing you.

"Y/N, no!" You hear his voice call out for you.

Crunch

Pain engulfs your body, but it's not the type if pain you were expecting. You're eyes are still closed from the impact, but you can feel something warm crushing you chest. You let out a weak cough and open your eyes. You could see the sky, the clouds, and the sun was blinding you. Your mind hazy, you admire the view above you before a familiar face is hovering above you, blocking it.

Connie was hovering over you, his hands pinning your shoulders to the ground. A look of fear and desperation clouded his wide, grey eyes. "Why the fuck did you go and do that, huh?" He screamed, tears freely flowing down his face and onto your cheeks. You tried to answer him but he didn't give you a chance. He shook you again. "Huh?! Answer me!"

You reached up to cup his face with one of your hands, tears threatening to spill from your eyes as well. "I know how much you miss your mom." You choked out. "I just wanted you to be happy."

His expression softened slightly, but he still looked a little angry. "C'mere." He sat the two of you up and pulled you into a tight embrace. "You think I'd be happy without you, idiot?"

"But what about your mom?" You sniffled. You were of course glad he had a change of heart because Falco was still alive and so were you, but you weren't convinced.

"I miss her. So much. But not as much as I would miss you and hate myself for letting you be so stupid." He answered.

"I wasn't being stupid. I was just trying to protect you." You snap.

"Protect me from what exactly?" He asked, still holding your head deep in his chest.

"Protect you from having to carry around the guilt of what you were about to do." You explained, your voice muffled in this chest.

He was silent as he held onto you for dear life. His heart was heavy at the thought of you giving up your own life to protect him from the shame and guilt that would have come with killing Falco. But that was who you were. Selfless to the core. In that moment he became thankful. Thankful that you stopped him, thankful that you were willing to reunite him with his mother, thankful that you loved him enough to stand by him no matter what. He hugged you tightly and buried his face into you neck. His tears wet the thin fabric of the shirt you wore.

"I'm sorry I let you down." He quietly sobbed into you.

You wrapped your arms tighter around him, rubbing his back and his hair with your hands. "Why do you think you let me down?"

"Cause I'm not a good person." His sniffles and small sobs continued as he held you.

"That's not true." You cooed.

"How do you know that?" He asked, finally looking down at you. His eyes were slightly red from the stress of the situation.

"Because I know you have such a big heart, Connie." You smiled, pressing the palm of your hand against his chest. You could feel his ragged heartbeat. "But you have to you use this too." You tapped his forehead, smiling.

"I've got you for that." He said, forcing a teary smile.

You pulled him in and placed a kiss on his forehead, then his cheek, then finally his lips. You held him there for a moment, savoring the kiss.

"So that's what we are?" You giggled after pulling away. "The head and the heart?"

"Seems like a good deal to me." He sighed.

You both stood up, hand in hand. Connie turned towards Armin. The two exchanged a look of understanding. An understanding that Connie knew he was out of line and he was regretful, and Armin accepted that.

"So what now?" Gabi asks.

There was a long silence before you spoke up.

"I mean... we kinda have to like save the world now." You say half joking. Only half though because it was true.

"I couldn't have said it better myself." Connie grinned.

[luckyqueenreign]

Wait a damn minute!!! So, Suresh kisses Gabi, marries Meera. Alfie kisses Kat, marries Meera. And Dana kisses Lulu, marries Alfie (i am on an Alfie route so maybe it differes??? If you know who Dana choses on her route let me know). Both boys kiss the person that they had a history with, someone that they HAVE to know would hurt mc. Both marry Meera. Now why Suresh did that is beyond me and i tend to belive your theory that he chose her because it would cause no more drama and maybe he buys the cute, innocent girl act??? Alfie i get it, you're in love with her or whatever (or at least until the next girl who laughs at your dad jokes comes in). But none of the LIs pick Mc for anything!!! What is fb playing at? Are they gonna use Finn's speech to make the others realise that they should stop playing games and do something about it?!!!

But but but ALSO this feels like they are saying it's your turn now. So i am holding out hope that based on your choices in this challenge you can have a chat with your LI and clear the air. Maybe Suresh really thought that mc doesn't want him anymore. Maybe Alfie/Dana really thinks that mc wants Suresh.

Mc never had the chance to decide or inform her LI that she wants them precisely. And that, thinking objectively, comes out as indecisive...so i guess i can see how the LIs just run with the assumption that mc doesn't want them anymore.

YESSSS its not just the Suresh route, all the other LIs feel MCs indecisiveness. I think them not picking MC for anything was to clear the space for Finn, his speech would've fallen on deaf ears to the Suresh girls if Suresh proposed to us, same to the Alfie girls had Alfie proposed, etc etc. We don't care about Finn unless you literally force us to care about him, which is what they're doing and why I'm not falling for it. Sorry Finny nice speech but keep it pushing!

MC has GOT to make a choice sooner rather than later with three weeks left....the clock is ticking.

[cultsplush]

Her heart had always been a vicious thing, reaching for anything it could touch, and wrapping itself around them. And while she had been in love with what felt like a lifetime now, it ended the same each time. What do you do when you're lost in the darkness? You look for the light, even the smallest flicker of it could save you from yourself, couldn't it? He'd told her once, hope was not lost. That she may be wondering through the darkness, but the light within her though dimmed, still flickered. She needed that then, when it felt like the world was going to swallow her whole. When she thought that maybe her grief, might grip onto all that she was, seeping ink unto her skin, until she's drowning in the tar of it all. He'd felt all of it, the weight of the world that bore on every inch of her body, and shouldered it, only to look back at her with tears in his eyes- she was lost, but not forgotten. And how could you? Gabriella Garcia was a name that left wake wherever she was. Strangers stopping at the tilt of her smile, and staying as the warmth melts iced hearts and all that it encompasses. She was a girl born of a curse, only to learn later in life, broken bones under moonlight was nothing compared to the bleeding and broken organ residing in her chest, refusing to give up.

She will pull herself out from the thoughts begging to be heard, only to focus in on her. In the midst somewhere, he had grown to be her safe place. The voices, she heard them too. Not nearly the way he had did, but she understands- to a point. The want to drown it all out. The need for silence. And while part of her wonder, about the girl he thought about back home, she couldn't help but also wonder- what was she compared to a girl with wings? When he nudges her with the soda, there's a quiet flicker of a smile, her eyes peering up from the water where she had averted his gaze before he'd turned around and paced towards her. She could blame the pink that tinted her features on the heat. It'd be easy. "You like the original better." Gabriella finally speaks, her voice quiet for those who welcomed sleep. Still, her gaze shift to the tin can, and she'll let out a small exhale of relief, when she notices the cherry cola flavor, outstretched to her. Fingertips are careful not to brush against his, not because she didn't want it, but because of the depths he'd been swept into just for the sake of touching her. The mind was a trimerous place, and right now- he couldn't be inside hers. Dimples gently touched her cheeks, indenting into the smile before she's taking a long sip, the cool burn a welcomed invitation, before outstretching it back to him, accidentally burping under her breath. "Sorry-" The sound is escaped through a halfway laugh, and those moments were few and far in between. Bella would have laughed. She was so atriously loud with it, proud that she could out-burp anyone in the bar. It was ridiculous. Even when they were kids, she'd do it on purpose sometimes, at the table- when their mother's gaze lingered a little bit too sharpened on Gabriella. And Gabi, in all her innocence, would giggle. The sisters sharing a look of wiggled brows.

"Sometimes, I think I've been so sure of what I've wanted for so long, that the more I wonder about it- the further away it gets." But she'll glance down at her feet again, the blue water rippling around them with the cast of lights from beneath the water. "Sometimes I'm afraid to say it out loud, like I'm going to jinx it." But when he says he'd come with her, even then, her shoulders softened a bit. And she'll make light. "I'd let you live in my pool house." Brows wiggled, just as she once did with her sister, her tone playful, the best she could be. "Or on a hammock, overlooking the ocean." The smile lingers, shifting her gaze up to him and then away again. The truth was, she just didn't want to be alone again. She didn't want a house, empty with the ghost of old memories. She wanted something new, with happiness echoed down the hallways. And truth be told, ever since leaving New Orleans- fuck-- ever since her sister died.. This was the closest to happy she had been.

So she listens, and she's always been good at that. Her eyes find his face when he talks, shifting along his features. You can always tell how much something means to someone, when you look at them talk about things they love. It's in the eyes, you can't lie when it's in the eyes. And his, they sparkled with pictures of his family, two sisters and a mother that despite her flaws- loved them. And she wonders, quietly, what that must have felt like. The only mother's love she'd ever felt, was Bella. Her sister was her keeper, but more often than not- she was her mother, too. "I bet that was nice." Gabriella finally catches herself breathing. "You sound happy. When you talk about them." Lips pursed, and she wanted to say that she felt that, at one point in her life. That she wasn't constantly thrust into the midst of danger. As if she wasn't constantly waiting for the other shoe to drop. As if, life sometimes could just be good, all on it's own. But-- she wasn't sure, as sad as it seemed.

"One time.." Tongue clicks to the roof of her mouth. "Bella and I had ditched New Orleans.." She'll let the words trail off. "Bad break up." Her head shakes quietly, and she's almost laughing. "Me again, could you guess?" -- "But anyways.. Bella and I went to Florida. It's awful, God- it was terrible. We got scammed out of this air bnb, and we ended up crashing at this really expensive hotel. Turns out, Taylor Swift was playing that weekend. The hotels were booked out across the city, and the next.. Except.. The lovers suite. -- Engagement gone wrong, or something." There's a roll of her eyes, and she's laughing. Genuinely. "We got complimentary champagne, and Bella- she used to have this talent for making people uncomfortable. Told the front desk girl it was a family reunion. I don't think I've seen the color drain outta' someone's face so quick. Anyway, we slept in this giant kings bed. Heart shaped headboard, it was ridiculous. I used to hate sharing a bed with her, she snored- and she said that I kicked in my sleep.. But I would give anything to go back to that.. And, there was this pool on the balcony. Again, ridiculous. She thought she could teach me how to swim.. I think I almost drowned us both." The words trail off for a moment. "I think she would have liked you. In this, loud obnoxious way. She had this laugh, that made you laugh. Especially when she snorted. It was terrible. She'd flirt with you relentlessly too, I bet."

The heaviness of humidity mixed with hot southern air hits his senses the moment they leave the room. But there is a gentle breeze cooling the sweat now covering his neck and the top of his brow and he can feel himself able to breathe again. Gabi heads for the pool, leaving him to grapple with the now vintage vending machine so overused that the numbers on the dials had worn off, leaving behind clues as to what the most desired item would have been. There's a snickers bar half-loaded, stuck against the blurred glass and he wonders the frustration it might've caused the unfortunate buyer who likely walked off empty-handed. There were traces of life lived everywhere he looked, and Ruby wondered what kind of traces he'd left behind. So many times he felt insignificant, invisible, and his powers didn't do much to help him feel seen or understood. People came to him for help, for prophecies, readings, simple conversation where they could feel, even if just for a moment, like they weren't alone. And in turn they took from him all that he could offer, and left pieces of themselves behind for him to hold on to and wonder how their lives might've turned out.

A cold can of a refreshing sugary drink falls down the pipe and he enjoys ever second of it fending off the heat of his palms as he walked over to the girl whose eyes he did not noticed lingering on him while his thoughts took over. Ruby would never imagine someone could look at him, truly look at him, much less like what they see. So he continues walking, oblivious to the fact, and lowers himself next to her, dipping his feet into the cold shimmering water of an empty worn-down pool of a nowhere motel. In spite all the heat, and all the struggle it took to get here, there was no place he would rather be. "Here --" he cracks open the drink and passes it to her, anticipating the look of enjoyment on her face as she takes on the first sip. Although he had given her all that he could, all that was within his ability, he still wished he could give her more -- to offer her the world he knew she deserved. Gabi was like a sun of an expanding galaxy, pulling the powerful and large objects into her gravity, giving them life, warmth, purpose. But if one dared orbit too close, give into her pull and reach her, they would be set aflame -- and he knew, more than anyone ever could, just how lonely that must have been. To long for a meeting and joining of the forces that could never be. She wasn't destructive, she wasn't selfish, or cruel -- she was powerful, and for better or worse, she had been without an equal, destined for the pull.

"Is that what you want? House by the beach? You and me...endless supply of cold drinks?" there's a nudge against her shoulder, as always, trying desperately to pull out a smile. A single dimple often sufficed. "Sometimes I think a simple life is the most extraordinary." it's a passing thought, he doesn't elaborate on it. "I would love to live with you by the beach." against his better judgment he looks at her as he says it. There was only a few ways one could show just how much they'd meant what they said, eyes were one of them, and his fixed on hers and softened at the greeting and he felt a strange sort of shyness take over before he looked away, hoping she would not read into it.

"Right --" the story, his mother, his life. So rarely did he talk about his life. "My mother is...eccentric, if -- if we were to be polite. One night she must've gotten tired of her life. The commune was all...smiles and good vibes an' all but, people are still people at the end of the day -- flawed...complicated." he takes in a breath, his legs moving back and forth against the density of cool water. "So she decided we should leave. Me and her and my sisters it was -- she made it seem like an adventure, exciting but, even then I could feel her heaviness, the sadness she carried. That night -- something was different. My sisters couldn't tell but, we weren't going on an adventure we were...running away." another pause and he will let the sip of the cold drink pass his lips, feeling more at ease than he had in days. "We got to the motel and there was a pool, not much different to this one. I've never been to a pool before -- couldn't swim for shit, but we were kids -- nothing was too dangerous and our mom she, I guess she was used to us always being looked after by somebody at the commune, always safe, you know? So she just...left. I don't know where or how long but, when she came back she brought with her a ton of takeaway, drinks, snacks --- just the kind of thing you need after hours of swimming and playing around." smile is on, the entire time and he will brush back his hair again, as he did when he was telling a story with no particular point, or reason. "I don't know why I'm telling you this but -- I think that was the first time I felt what it must be like to have...an actual family. A normal....a normal life. And when I'm in the water, my head submerged just enough to cover up my ears, to shut out the noise it -- it all goes quiet. So fucking quiet and I can hear my heart beat and shut out the world....I never wanted to leave. It's not much...not much different now, with you."