#I'm not guilt tripping

[luxlightly]

There's a question at the heart of philosophical debate for centuries which is "is it more important that people do not die, or that I do not feel I have a hand in killing them?"

It's the basis of the trolley problem. Do I choose to let 4 people die just so that I could say I didn't personally kill one person? Which is more important? Their lives or my conscience?

From an outside perspective, we feel the answer should be obvious: that in choosing not to act, we are still acting. We are still choosing to allow 4 people to die. But, in the moment itself, it's hard to see, and we recognize that. The idea of being in any way supporting a single death is more than most people's conscience will allow. It's easier to let go of the switch and distance ourselves from the responsibility of the result.

But when the price of inaction becomes hundreds of thousands of lives, the gap of morality grows. When you have seen hundreds of thousands die already and you know hundreds of thousands more will, the idea of putting one's own personal sense of moral purity above those lives becomes harder for me to understand or defend. Especially in a case where, if one doesn't act, everyone on both sets of tracks dies.

Conceptually I do, of course. It's not like morality is a simple issue, especially in the face of mass atrocities. There's a reason the tolley problem exists, after all. But in practically, I will always have a fundamental difference in morality as people who think like that, when it reaches the scale it has.

It's still my choice, regardless if I choose not to act and I won't ever allow more blood to be spilled just to say my own hands are clean of it. To me, nothing seems more performative than that.

[aishabellasbigblogofeverything]

I love it when women hate men. I love it when women are allowed to vent to each other about how horrible and creepy men are. I love it when women form friendships with and prioritize each other over relationships with men(whether they're attracted to them or not). I love it when women put men dni in their bios and on their nude photos and on posts on their blogs. I love it when women refuse to mollycoddle and accommodate entitled male feelings with "but this doesn't mean I hate all men, I know a few men who are great, I love my father/sons/brothers/uncles/male cousins/guy friends" I love it when women complain about men WITHOUT "not all men" being a disclaimer. I love it when women avoid socializing with/refuse to be around/befriend/get close to men because they know men can't be trusted. I love it when women make "kill all men" jokes. I love it when women offer absolutely no concern or care for men's feelings and if their misandry offends men whatsoever because why should we, men are the oppressor class who have raped and killed and abused us and kept us as subjugated as second-class citizens for millennia, they regularly mistreat us and the women in their own marginalized communities still every single day and make this world so much harder and more awful for us to be in, and if we choose to hate them and not spare them any sympathy then so be it, and I don't just mean "men as a class" either, you can be a woman who doesn't want to have anything to do with any man on an individual basis and completely cuts off men from her personal life too and ykw I will love and fucking support you in that because men deserve absolutely NOTHING from us. If they're so tough and strong then they can handle it just like they can handle being lonely. If you are a woman who hates men, ESPECIALLY IF YOU ARE A LESBIAN AND/OR A TRANS WOMAN, then just know that I love you. I love you, I support you, and you are safe here.

[serpentface]

Scenes from The Baby Wars Part One: The First One

[Hibrides never wanted to be a mother (though the concept of childbearing has always occurred to her as 'inevitable and necessary'), underwent very severe post-partum depression, never really bonded with the infant, and was extremely uncomfortable with nursing her (they had a wet nurse who covered most of it).

Brakul ended up being the Designated Housewife throughout Erubi's infancy and was effectively the only member of the household providing parental care, was Extremely bitter with Hibrides for not really wanting anything to do with her daughter (among other things), and was raised in a context where fathers allowing their infants to comfort nurse on them is a standard practice (which is not widely conceptualized as a Thing men can do in the Wardi cultural sphere and comes off as bizarre to the rest of his household).

These combined factors lead to tense standoffs where he looms behind Hibrides trying to guilt her into Feeding The GodDamn Baby while looking, from her perspective, like he's trying his absolute hardest to breastfeed.]

[spop-romanticizes-abuse]

catra: it's YOUR fault the world is ending, YOU are responsible for all the horrible things happening in this world even though you had no hand in any of it

fans:

adora: i mean, you are kind of disrespectful to shadow weaver

fans: OMG ADORA IS AN ABUSER HOW DARE SHE VICTIM BLAME CATRA-

[deliciouskeys]

yfw you try to go comment on fics posted not so long ago and find out comments have been locked ....... :c

Sigh. I'm about to say something that I'll likely regret because it'll come off preachy and guilt-trippy and it isn't meant to be, I swear:

I feel like HL fandom has been kind of bad about commenting after season 4 aired (I include myself in this, in case that's not perfectly clear) and it's been discouraging to the writers, ones who came in recently and not so recently. How are we expecting to have stuff to read if we don't acknowledge that we enjoyed something? We are a really small community, so it's not like there's 100 other readers behind each of us, 10 of whom will comment. An earlier post vaguely on this subject had someone asking "what about kudos". I mean, kudos are definitely great. I would say essential. But they alone are probably not going to sustain a thriving ao3 fandom.

"Not you, Black Noir X Reader, you've been great." Or maybe not perfectly great either, but it looks better than canon pairings, at least from the outside looking in.

I'm not sure what I'm advocating here exactly. Maybe what I'm saying is sticking an emoji reaction in a comment might be better than nothing for those who post a bunch of oneshots into one space, where you've kudosed once and then never again. Just so the people writing it know that someone read it and found something that resonated. Some of these are damn good fics and have literally zero comments, and I'm sure people have read them and enjoyed them but there's nary a trace of it letting the author know.

[nitewrighter]

I feel like "Voting as harm reduction" falls under the category of, "Does your leftist praxis involve doing the dishes" like yeah no, it's not ideal but it's kind of bare minimum.

[whistlingstarlight]

Haha okay my bosses fucked up my transfer so I'm unemployed for the foreseeable future until it can (hopefully) be sorted. Any commissions would be hugely appreciated atm ✨

[fishymom-art]

day uuhh who knows how long, around 2 months or smth, of dealing with my asshole principal who won't let me leave my school

remember the times when i was happy that i'm going to school? -_-

[yardsards]

how to explain to your parents that you can't move back in with them because every time you're near them a big part of you buries itself and you're not sure how long that part can stay buried before its hidey hole becomes its grave?

...without offending them, of course

[galaxythreads]

oh and another thing! what was the point of having Loki develop friendships so that way he could "have a meaningful relationship for the first time in his life" when Thor was RIGHT THERE the whole time???

The movie saga:

The series, for some reason:

[smhalltheurlsaretaken]

if you ever want to have a productive discussion with me about what i have and haven't expressed on this site, come off anon. I owe you nothing if you won't do me the courtesy of talking as two people, instead of trying to have me platform whatever you want to say by having me pointlessly defend myself and argue against somebody I can't even be sure is reading my answers. If, as you said, you used to admire me (which I've done nothing to deserve, this was a silly fandom blog), then you should at least trust that I'm interested in honest talk enough to attach your name to what you say to me.

[oidheadh-con-culainn]

had a really interesting convo yesterday about ethics and whether intent or results matters (eg if you tried to make an ethical purchasing choice but the business was actually exploitative as hell, does that "count") and very much came to the conclusion that sure, if you're concerned with your personal immortal soul, as a christian might be, then intention counts. but if what you're focused on is your impact on the world, then intention means nothing if the actions have negative results, right? (that doesn't mean you're to blame for them! you didn't know! but you also don't get "ethics points" for trying, you know?)

and this also got me thinking about the whole christian idea that sinful thoughts are as bad as sinful actions because. they're just not imo. maybe for the sake of your Immortal Soul they are points against you, if that's your jam. but in terms of putting good into the world, in terms of your impact on other people, the ONLY thing that matters is what you choose to do with those thoughts. there is no way that "was kind to someone who was pissing me off, for the sake of community harmony" or "helped an acquaintance with a task even though I felt resentful about the time spent doing that" is a Bad Thing for the world

and it made me wonder how much purity culture and thought policing is rooted in (mostly evangelical) cultural christianity and this idea that ethical choices are an individual thing because what matters is the impact of them on YOUR soul and not, you know, things we do because of what we owe the world around us / because of love for others / because a world where people are trying to put good into it is a hell of a lot nicer to live in than one where people are only worried about themselves

i grew up evangelical but like. fairly mild evangelical and even though there wasn't a big focus on hell and stuff, i definitely fixated on imperfect thoughts and behaviours that were putting absolutely no harm into the world, rather than focusing on what i could do to put good into it, and that individualistic vs outward-focused approach to morality has been something i've grappled with a lot as an adult. but i never really thought about it as simply as this and really that's what it boils down to. are you making the ethical choice because you're trying to put good in the world, or because it would make you a "good person" to do so? because the answer to that 100% defines whether it's the thought or the result that counts

[tinyfantasminha]

high pitched whimper

[sorren-sews]

life update: had to leave my job thanks to long covid. i'll most likely have a job again by late november, just one that doesn't pay as well.

i don't need to open commissions yet, but requests are open. i'll take as many as i can get- especially since i'll have a lot more free time starting in two weeks.

while i don't need additional financial support right now, many others do. i'd like to nudge anyone reading this towards gaza funds and world vision. gaza funds hosts fundraisers for palestinian families. world vision provides hurricane relief to the southern united states.

[palmtreepalmtree]

My mom bullied me into going to a Passover seder at some semi-related family members, and I agreed cause she's old and I don't have many of these left.

They sent out an email instructing people to bring a photo of someone that we would like to have at the table but who otherwise could not attend.

As someone who has lost a father, all four grandparents, an aunt, an uncle, and a cousin, this is like telling me to bring a freight train of emotion to a stranger's table, and I am so annoyed by it. I understand that it's a nice gesture, and I'm sure as we go around the table talking about who we would like to have with us who can't be there, that it will be a meaningful moment to a lot of people, and I hope that I will somehow manage not to burst into tears (no, I will, I am getting teary about it now just thinking about it), but FUCK.

I don't know. Maybe I'll bring a photo of Harpo Marx. Nothing says 'we were slaves in Egypt' like the occasional interruption of a honking horn.

[garygoldenbignaturals]

are we really tone policing people who are trying to escape a genocide. is that what we're doing now