#I'm just saying you're getting a kind of extreme response
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rodger-eyeballis · 1 hour ago
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”Mm.. What a surprise. Ugh.” *It was immediately obvious from Rodger that he was extremely surprised by this turn of events, which even immediately forgot about Dandy. Now he can't decide whether to greet a family friend or strangle him to hell. But in fact, he was glad that their case had led to a simple and safe end.. Although, only Detective Toodles and Rodger will have a safe ending, but Glisten is definitely out of the question now. Hungry and sleepless detective fathers in anger are very scary.* ”I hear familiar voices!! Aww, my dear baby and attractive Detective.” * The door opened abruptly and gracefully, as if the mirror had entered his room and not the place of the attack. Its brilliance starts to hurt the eyes for a while, but after a couple of seconds its brightness in this room becomes familiar. By the look of it, he didn't know exactly what was going to happen here.* "Greetings to the ‘wall-kissing lover’ and.. Oh, and greetings to the little Detective Toodles, I see~” *Rodger could no longer control himself, and he had just been rattled by the strange nickname Glisten, which Lupa had heard before and which she did not want to hear in the future. Poor Rodger even had an eye twitching from embarrassment and from this guy's audacity. Someone will definitely not survive today. Rodger glanced slightly at the cheerful face of Toodles, who was pleased with this turn of the investigation. You have to control yourself. For her sake.* ”Are you investigating on a day like this? You're not resting at all, poor things.. I would help you, but after the sweets want to find something else delicious. The beautiful Glisten is too greedy for sweets, and I would be extremely grateful if such "offerings" were made to me every day.. Oh Rodger, I totally forgot to thank you for the cookies, you found them right when I di—..“
”ARE YOU IDIOT?!”
*Haha, you definitely won't get bored with them. What kind of self-control is being discussed if all the spoken words of the mirror exceed the boundaries. Realizing that he had crossed the line with his own words, Rodger began to speak more calmly so as not to frighten anyone in this room, especially his little girl. Although, Glisten already looks like he's about to be led to execution. However, this is not such a big lie.*
”I’am—”
”Having reviewed all the evidence and analyzed our joint activities, while finding the solution to the mystery, Detective Toodles, the investigation is officially closed. Thank you for your cooperation and help in catching the kidnapper, Detective. Now, the defendant will go to ‘correctional labor’, under MY supervision. He is fully responsible for the offense.” *Rodger, as if to say goodbye, patted Toodles on the head again. Maybe he would have winked if he had two eyes instead of one. His face immediately softened, which mostly meant that he was more amused by the situation than upset.. But someone has to play the evil Detective in this ‘game’, right? Lupa took the records from the table, went to Glisten, without even looking at his face, took him by the scruff of the neck and dragged him to the exit.* ”Toodles, help m—! mmmhm!” *The magnifying glass carefully covered the mirror's mouth so that it would not give a dramatic concert. Now, it's time to say one last thing.* ”Toodles, dear, I'll let you know later when Glisten can pay you damages for the cookies. It's not just that he boasted that ‘he can cook anything better than Cosmo’, now he's going to show us his culinary skills. Yes?!” ”mm..mmh..” ”And also.. If something happens.. a bad one, for example, or.. The investigation will go badly, you can always call me, even if I am.. busy. Also, be careful, if your gut tells you ‘dangerous,' it means it's not for nothing. Watch your feelings, they'll always protect you when I'm not around, Detective Toodles. ” * After finishing his speech, Rodger took the mirror ‘backstage’, leaving Toodles alone in the room. It seems like this is the end of one Toodles adventure and the beginning of a new one for Glistens, haha..*
"Rodger! Rodger! I found the records you asked me to search for! I actually found four of them." Toodles dashed over to Rodger, cradling the records in her arms and making sure not to drop them. She came to a halt right in front of him, excitedly lifting up the classical music records. "Is this what you were looking for, Dad?"
[ @ask-detective-toodles ]
*Rodger initially didn't even look at the records, he started looking at the Toodles, as if worried if she had any injuries after a small task. After making sure that everything was fine, Magnifier’s eye twisted into a smile, looking at the very music discs that he needed so much. Patting dear girl on the head.. that is, a Little detective, Rodger finally picked up the records and began to read out the name of the music to himself.*
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” Beautiful specimens, Toodles! I knew that no one could do this better than you. That is, mm. ” *Rodger abruptly quieted down his joy, and began to speak extremely seriously, as if he were talking not to his daughter, but to an adult.* ”Your investigation has come to an end, Detective Toodles. Summing up results and observing some of your actions, I can say with confidence that you did extremely well! Therefore, as the head of the detective management department, I am ready to present you with an award for your help in finding things.” *Magnifier turns to the table to look at the plate of cookies he has set out. Rodger barely snatched the last batch of cookies for the day from Cosmo, so it was a really valuable reward for Toodles, in his opinion.* ” Here are the cook— … ”
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*The plate was almost empty! Only small crumbs remained.. Someone brutally ate the cookies that Rodger carefully stored. The man's detective instincts abruptly turned on and he began to analyze the place of the attack with his eye. In less than a few seconds, he abruptly made a verdict.* ” It's definitely not Pebble. Also, the cookies were eaten very carefully, which proves that they were eaten by a more than well-mannered toon. The only thing I'm not sure about is why they were eaten.. with a fork. ”*Then Rodger abruptly remembers that there are still Toodles next to him. It seems that the man now looks very upset. It's just not clear anymore because of what: because of the fact that cookies were actually eaten under his nose, or because his child will not receive a reward.*
”I'm sorry.. I... oh.. ”
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sophiamcdougall · 1 year ago
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You're a reasonably informed person on the internet. You've experienced things like no longer being able to get files off an old storage device, media you've downloaded suddenly going poof, sites and forums with troves full of people's thoughts and ideas vanishing forever. You've heard of cybercrime. You've read articles about lost media. You have at least a basic understanding that digital data is vulnerable, is what I'm saying. I'm guessing that you're also aware that history is, you know... important? And that it's an ongoing study, requiring ... data about how people live? And that it's not just about stanning celebrities that happen to be dead? Congratulations, you are significantly better-informed than the British government! So they're currently like "Oh hai can we destroy all these historical documents pls? To save money? Because we'll digitise them first so it's fine! That'll be easy, cheap and reliable -- right? These wills from the 1850s will totally be fine for another 170 years as a PNG or whatever, yeah? We didn't need to do an impact assesment about this because it's clearly win-win! We'd keep the physical wills of Famous People™ though because Famous People™ actually matter, unlike you plebs. We don't think there are any equalities implications about this, either! Also the only examples of Famous People™ we can think of are all white and rich, only one is a woman and she got famous because of the guy she married. Kisses!"
Yes, this is the same Government that's like "Oh no removing a statue of slave trader is erasing history :(" You have, however, until 23 February 2024 to politely inquire of them what the fuck they are smoking. And they will have to publish a summary of the responses they receive. And it will look kind of bad if the feedback is well-argued, informative and overwhelmingly negative and they go ahead and do it anyway. I currently edit documents including responses to consultations like (but significantly less insane) than this one. Responses do actually matter. I would particularly encourage British people/people based in the UK to do this, but as far as I can see it doesn't say you have to be either. If you are, say, a historian or an archivist, or someone who specialises in digital data do say so and draw on your expertise in your answers. This isn't a question of filling out a form. You have to manually compose an email answering the 12 questions in the consultation paper at the link above. I'll put my own answers under the fold. Note -- I never know if I'm being too rude in these sorts of things. You probably shouldn't be ruder than I have been.
Please do not copy and paste any of this: that would defeat the purpose. This isn't a petition, they need to see a range of individual responses. But it may give you a jumping-off point.
Question 1: Should the current law providing for the inspection of wills be preserved?
Yes. Our ability to understand our shared past is a fundamental aspect of our heritage. It is not possible for any authority to know in advance what future insights they are supporting or impeding by their treatment of material evidence. Safeguarding the historical record for future generations should be considered an extremely important duty.
Question 2: Are there any reforms you would suggest to the current law enabling wills to be inspected?
No.
Question 3: Are there any reasons why the High Court should store original paper will documents on a permanent basis, as opposed to just retaining a digitised copy of that material?
Yes. I am amazed that the recent cyber attack on the British Library, which has effectively paralysed it completely, not been sufficient to answer this question for you.  I also refer you to the fate of the Domesday Project. Digital storage is useful and can help more people access information; however, it is also inherently fragile. Malice, accident, or eventual inevitable obsolescence not merely might occur, but absolutely should be expected. It is ludicrously naive and reflects a truly unpardonable ignorance to assume that information preserved only in digital form is somehow inviolable and safe, or that a physical document once digitised, never need be digitised again..At absolute minimum, it should be understood as certain that at least some of any digital-only archive will eventually be permanently lost. It is not remotely implausible that all of it would be. Preserving the physical documents provides a crucial failsafe. It also allows any errors in reproduction -- also inevitable-- to be, eventually, seen and corrected. Note that maintaining, upgrading and replacing digital infrastructure is not free, easy or reliable. Over the long term, risks to the data concerned can only accumulate.
"Unlike the methods for preserving analog documents that have been honed over millennia, there is no deep precedence to look to regarding the management of digital records. As such, the processing, long-term storage, and distribution potential of archival digital data are highly unresolved issues. [..] the more digital data is migrated, translated, and re-compressed into new formats, the more room there is for information to be lost, be it at the microbit-level of preservation. Any failure to contend with the instability of digital storage mediums, hardware obsolescence, and software obsolescence thus meets a terminal end—the definitive loss of information. The common belief that digital data is safe so long as it is backed up according to the 3-2-1 rule (3 copies on 2 different formats with 1 copy saved off site) belies the fact that it is fundamentally unclear how long digital information can or will remain intact. What is certain is that its unique vulnerabilities do become more pertinent with age."  -- James Boyda, On Loss in the 21st Century: Digital Decay and the Archive, Introduction.
Question 4: Do you agree that after a certain time original paper documents (from 1858 onwards) may be destroyed (other than for famous individuals)? Are there any alternatives, involving the public or private sector, you can suggest to their being destroyed?
Absolutely not. And I would have hoped we were past the "great man" theory of history. Firstly, you do not know which figures will still be considered "famous" in the future and which currently obscure individuals may deserve and eventually receive greater attention. I note that of the three figures you mention here as notable enough to have their wills preserved, all are white, the majority are male (the one woman having achieved fame through marriage) and all were wealthy at the time of their death. Any such approach will certainly cull evidence of the lives of women, people of colour and the poor from the historical record, and send a clear message about whose lives you consider worth remembering.
Secondly, the famous and successsful are only a small part of our history. Understanding the realities that shaped our past and continue to mould our present requires evidence of the lives of so-called "ordinary people"!
Did you even speak to any historians before coming up with this idea?
Entrusting the documents to the private sector would be similarly disastrous. What happens when a private company goes bust or decides that preserving this material is no longer profitable? What reasonable person, confronted with our crumbling privatised water infrastructure, would willingly consign any part of our heritage to a similar fate?
Question 5: Do you agree that there is equivalence between paper and digital copies of wills so that the ECA 2000 can be used?
No. And it raises serious questions about the skill and knowledge base within HMCTS and the government that the very basic concepts of data loss and the digital dark age appear to be unknown to you. I also refer you to the Domesday Project.
Question 6: Are there any other matters directly related to the retention of digital or paper wills that are not covered by the proposed exercise of the powers in the ECA 2000 that you consider are necessary?
Destroying the physical documents will always be an unforgivable dereliction of legal and moral duty.
Question 7: If the Government pursues preserving permanently only a digital copy of a will document, should it seek to reform the primary legislation by introducing a Bill or do so under the ECA 2000?
Destroying the physical documents will always be an unforgivable dereliction of legal and moral duty.
Question 8: If the Government moves to digital only copies of original will documents, what do you think the retention period for the original paper wills should be? Please give reasons and state what you believe the minimum retention period should be and whether you consider the Government’s suggestion of 25 years to be reasonable.
There is no good version of this plan. The physical documents should be preserved.
Question 9: Do you agree with the principle that wills of famous people should be preserved in the original paper form for historic interest?
This question betrays deep ignorance of what "historic interest" actually is. The study of history is not simply glorified celebrity gossip. If anything, the physical wills of currently famous people could be considered more expendable as it is likely that their contents are so widely diffused as to be relatively "safe", whereas the wills of so-called "ordinary people" will, especially in aggregate, provide insights that have not yet been explored.
Question 10: Do you have any initial suggestions on the criteria which should be adopted for identifying famous/historic figures whose original paper will document should be preserved permanently?
Abandon this entire lamentable plan. As previously discussed, you do not and cannot know who will be considered "famous" in the future, and fame is a profoundly flawed criterion of historical significance.
Question 11: Do you agree that the Probate Registries should only permanently retain wills and codicils from the documents submitted in support of a probate application? Please explain, if setting out the case for retention of any other documents.
No, all the documents should be preserved indefinitely.
Question 12: Do you agree that we have correctly identified the range and extent of the equalities impacts under each of these proposals set out in this consultation? Please give reasons and supply evidence of further equalities impacts as appropriate.
No. You appear to have neglected equalities impacts entirely. As discussed, in your drive to prioritise "famous people", your plan will certainly prioritise the white, wealthy and mostly the male, as your "Charles Dickens, Charles Darwin and Princess Diana" examples amply indicate. This plan will create a two-tier system where evidence of the lives of the privileged is carefully preserved while information regarding people of colour, women, the working class and other disadvantaged groups is disproportionately abandoned to digital decay and eventual loss. Current and future historians from, or specialising in the history of minority groups will be especially impoverished by this.  
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vaguely-concerned · 28 days ago
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can you even imagine what a fucking horror show the early game is from spite's perspective, though. not only is this funky forcibly severed little slip of the fade having to deal with the reverse cosmic horror of physical reality as perceived by a spirit and being trapped in it against its will -- existentially confused and disoriented and hurting and nothing makes any kind of sense, at the mercy of human cruelty at its most deliberately sadistic. and then the one source of comfort and compassion and some kind of safety and clarity that lucanis surely must have been to him in the ossuary despite everything just goes and shuts himself in his room inside with a seemingly passive aggressive number of locks between them and no explanation and won't speak to him and they're STILL in the fucking ossuary. rook came and found them and they could be free now (rook is here!) and still lucanis keeps them in the ossuary even though he PROMISED he promised they'd get out of there together!!! what the fuck DO you think at that point? like did he trick me that whole time??? he wasn't like zara before, so why is he doing this to me now? why isn't he saying anything? 'he won't move. I can't reach him'. at least in the ossuary they had a deal, a goal, a hope -- each other. at least he wasn't entirely alone, before.
this poor poor poor little spite spirit really was ferried into the real world like 'hey welcome to reality! as your first introduction to it you're first getting horrifically tortured and then getting to vicariously experience one of THE most distressing and harrowing psychological conditions the human brain can cook up for itself (a fully fledged and deeply entrenched freeze response flaring up with catastrophic severity due to an unbroken ongoing and unlikely to let up any time soon chain of Unfortunately... Recent Events). I think spite is being extremely reasonable and patient about the whole thing, when you put it into perspective. I'm not saying let him eat the self-lighting candles or anything, but he's got some extremely valid points along the way lol. spite is not only child-like, the metaphor work going on is a lot more pleasingly flexible and complex than that, but he is also helplessly existentially dependent on lucanis in a way that, if anything, is a heightened version of the way a child (or child part) has to depend on a parent to navigate the world and survive.
tl;dr: we truly don't give enough sympathy to spite for having to live in the head of lucanis dellamorte. a place even lucanis dellamorte would prefer not to be. to be fair to him I think lucanis would be the first person to agree with this lol
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anthotneystark · 6 months ago
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Well, if you're rough and ready for love (Honey, I'm tougher than the rest)
(edit: now on ao3!)
Eddie is suffering.
It’s hardly the first time, but it’s self-inflicted this time. At least it’s not going to physically almost kill him like the bats did.
Emotionally, sure, but not physically. That has to be some kind of win.
“Did you get Vecna’d? Do I have to get my trumpet? I don’t know if you can play Metallica on a horn, but I’ll try if you need me to.”
“Buckley, I would pay money to see you attempt it,” he says absently, his gaze never moving.
“Good, I could use the bonus.”
“Probably a good time to say I’ve only got Monopoly money.”
“Damn, there goes that plan.”
He hums an agreement, startling a moment later when a hand is suddenly blocking his view.
“Stop drooling, it’s not attractive.”
“Nothing about me is attractive to you.”
���Fair, but still. Ew,” she snorts.
“It’s not my fault, I can’t help it. He’s just so….” He doesn’t even have a word for it, so he just sighs.
“Who would have thought. Mr. Anti-Conformity drooling over Jock Extraordinaire. He’s wearing pastels. What have you become?”
“Shut up, he’s your platonic soulmate.”
“He is. And I love him. I just also know that he’s all sporty and preppy.”
“He can be as sporty as he wants as long as he keeps wearing those shorts he had on the other day.”
“Gross.”
“Even you can admit he looked good.”
“Sure, but you’re drooling again.”
He should be allowed a little drool. Steve had looked so biteable.
“He’s not even wearing shorts today, it’s too cold for that, doofus.” It was. Summer had well and truly turned into fall. Shorts had been replaced by jeans (except on the days Steve and Lucas played basketball, then the shorts came back out), polos more often than not were exchanged for sweaters, and by god, it was kissing him even more than the shorts and tank tops of summer had.
(This is without even considering the extreme number of shirts that Steve had sacrificed to become half shirts “for more air flow, because I can’t just walk around shirtless, obviously.” Because it was obvious. Showing his chest was too much, but the soft skin of his stomach, interrupted by the trail of dark hair vanishing under his waist band, wasn’t too much. Obviously.)
It made no sense. It shouldn’t have been worse with less skin showing. But it was because somehow, knowing that the soft knit of those sweaters was covering slowly paling skin, strong muscles and that beautiful, amazing layer of softness that rounded out hard edges…well, it completely ruined his train of thought until he couldn’t remember where he’d been going originally.
Worth it, just getting to imagine how Steve looked under his clothes.
“He’s worn this stuff before, why does it have you in a coma today?” Robin sighs, put upon even though it was her decision to sit with him.
“His hair.” Because that was the kicker today. Because Steve Harrington had never walked outside looking less than completely perfect.
Because Steve somehow managed to look amazing even roughed up and dirty.
Because Stevie was comfortable with himself and picked the clothes he liked and didn’t bother hiding scars that only proved how far he’d be willing to go to protect his loved ones and didn’t care about if he didn’t look perfect.
“He didn’t style it.”
“I can see how you’d get that impression, but I assure you he did.”
“What?!” That makes Eddie finally look at her, nearly falling over where he’s sat.
“Yeah. It’s just not hairspray. He’s trying something new.”
“It works for him.” The response is automatic. Because it’s true. Because poofed up and closer to god could only work on someone as pretty as Steve, and gunked up and water-logged could only work on someone as pretty as Steve, and bedhead could only look that good on someone as pretty as Steve.
Steve is just. So pretty.
But today, today it’s not firmly in place, soft even if it’s not going to move from it’s position. Today it’s not slicked back with water as he pops up from under it to splash one of the kids. Today it’s not half flat from where he slept on it, the same side he’ll leave pressed into Eddie’s shoulder if he’s not quite ready to start the day.
Today, it’s soft, curling around his ears, over his forehead, fluttering in the wind. It’s not the same kind of curly that his own hair is, the chaotic kind that if he tried to brush it, it’d eat the brush. It’s gentler, and he desperately wants to touch it.
“Seriously, I’m worried about your brain right now.”
“My brain is fine.”
“Close your mouth then.” Well, that’s embarrassing. He tosses a glare at her, and it’s just enough time to miss Steve heading their way. He does fall over where he’s sitting this time, but it’s so worth it because it makes Steve laugh.
He’d do an embarrassing amount of things to hear that laugh.
“You okay?” Steve asks, looking so fond and amused at Eddie’s antics that it makes his heart skip a beat.
It’s still surprising, having that look aimed at him, getting it from Steve.
“Fear not, Sir Stevington, I will survive,” he says, pushing himself up dramatically. Steve’s eyes crinkle as he snorts another laugh, and they both ignore Robin quietly bleching.
“Yeah? Good. I’d hate to see you get through everything just to get taken out by your own theatrics,” Steve says. Eddie doesn’t even have time to react – Steve’s smiling and that always slows him down – when his gorgeous, beautiful friend pulls off that pale green sweater and presses it into Eddie’s hands.
“Don’t get cold on me, alright? I saw you shivering,” he says, like he hasn’t just ruffled his own hair once more and completely distracted all of Eddie’s thoughts in the blink of an eye.
And then he’s gone, off to give another attempt at skateboarding (trying to follow Max’s instructions and letting her laugh at him when she hears him fall before she does whatever trick it is perfectly even without her sight), and Eddie is left standing there, watching that perfect, broad back covered by a too tight tee shirt.
“This is a whole new level of pathetic, I think.”
“Shup it,” Eddie says, then freezes, feels her shit-eating grin growing. “Shut up!” He groans.
She can laugh all she wants, he decides, pulling Steve’s sweater over his head. It’s warm with his body heat, smells like his soap and his cologne and him.
She can laugh, he’s got a beautiful boy to watch, one who looks at him with a promise of what’s to come, when the time is right.
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oikasugayama · 1 year ago
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YOU CATCH HIM M@STURBAT!NG pt. 2
MDNI, this is NSFW content for adults!!
pt. 1 Fyodor, Poe, Chuuya | pt. 2 Fukuzawa, Kunikida, Dazai | pt. 3, Ranpo, Akutagawa, Ango | pt. 4 Sigma, Mori, Tetcho | pt. 5 (finale) Atsushi, Nikolai
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Fukuzawa
ok this one you did NOT expect. you've seen dazai get a hard-on at work, you've heard junichiro and naomi (NOT siblings though they grossly pretend to be) talking about their sex plans after work, but YOUR BOSS? THE PRESIDENT??
he's in his office palming his boner through his clothes when you open the door. you come in like always, using your shoulder to hold the door open as you turn and come in backwards so that the tray of tea you're holding doesn't get knocked over by thumping against the door.
you're almost across the room to his desk by the time you realize that there's a VERY DISTINCT tent in his yukata that he can't decide if he should push down with his hand or not--either way it's obvious that he's hard.
his face is flushed, he's shocked, embarrassed, and extremely apologetic.
you're frozen for a moment, but when he says your name and "i'm so sorry" you decide to pretend like you don't see anything. you put the tray down on his desk, pour him a cup of tea, and tell him to page for you if he needs anything.
you close the door behind you and have to take a moment to gather yourself. he's your boss so there's absolutely no way you were about to come onto him, but god he's so kind and handsome and his deep voice is just so fucking hot. you feel like a creep being there while he was trying to have a private moment, but he was at work, he should have known better than to touch himself when you were scheduled to bring his afternoon tea-- wait, did he do it on purpose? should you go back in? no. no he wouldn't have done that. it must have been an accident.
you tell yourself it must have been an accident and go back to work like nothing happened, though it's all you can think about all day.
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Kunikida
he desperately needs to relieve stress after an incredibly tiresome and busy week. he just got back to his dorm, looking forward to two days off work. he wastes no time settling onto his couch, cracking open his laptop, and playing a random porn video (it helps him get the job done more efficiently because watching makes him cum faster)
he uses earbuds so he doesn't disturb his neighbors, unfortunately this means that while he's in the midst of it he doesn't hear you unlocking his door (he gave you the key for emergencies because you're responsible--you occasionally drop groceries off to him if you're making a trip out and he needs something, much like is happening right now)
you open the door and there he is, vest and shirt unbuttoned, pants and boxers pulled down just enough to get his cock out. one hand works over his length steadily while the other cups his balls. you gasp and drop the bag of groceries, turning and slamming the door closed behind you.
his eyes were closed, though, so he didn't notice until the slam of the door echoed past the sound of the video he watches. when he sees the bag on the ground he immediately knows what must have happened and he's so fucking embarrassed that he feels sick. he hopes you don't think he did it on purpose; he couldn't have known you would come over right now.
he tries to go to your dorm a few hours later, but you don't answer when he knocks, and you don't respond to his texts all weekend.
on monday in the ADA office he waits until you're the only two in the room, then he quietly approaches you and says he owes you an apology.
"for what?" you ask, playing dumb.
"i suspect that when you came by my dorm to drop something off you may have seen me doing something inappropriate. i sincerely apologize that you had to see that. i had no idea you would be coming over."
you take a few seconds to think of what to say, but eventually settle on "it's not inappropriate to touch yourself, kunikida. you're an adult, you can do what you want in your own home"
he blushes deeply, feeling warm all the way to his toes.
"that may be so, but regardless, i apologize that you had to see it. i hope we can forget about this soon."
"oh, I'll never forget," you say wistfully, turning away in your spinny chair. "it's burned into my eyes. every time i close them, there you are......."
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Dazai
he's on the roof of the ADA building, lying in the middle instead of near the edge. he's staring up at the sky, pondering how small he is in such a vast universe.
and then he gets a random surprise boner and thinks, well i might as welllll.......
you were downstairs working when kunikida asked you to find dazai and make him go back to work. dazai tended to listen to you, after all.
you checked all of his usual spots--the couch, under his desk, under atsushi's desk, in the supply closet, in the cafe downstairs, and finally you went to the roof, hoping he wasn't sitting a hair's width from the edge again like he was the last time you found him up there.
when you open the door, you first notice that he's spread out on the ground with his head turned away from you and think maybe he's passed out--then you notice his hips buck up into his hand and his back arch up a little.
the wind carries the sound of his voice over to you, and you swear he just said your name.
"dazai?" you say meekly, and his head whips to the side, eyes wide in surprise as he sees you. he sits up quickly, turning away from you, using his coat to cover his crotch.
"um... kunikida... he wanted me to find you."
"...okay... please don't tell him what I was doing."
"I really, genuinely won't."
"...okay... do you, um... are you, um... did you hear what i, uh.. what i said when you... got here..."
"yeahhh..."
"shit..."
"hm... i didn't know you were into me, honestly," you say, shrugging.
"oh, yeah," dazai says, feeling very vulnerable since you caught him with his literal pants down. "ranpo told, like, everyone. i'm surprised you didn't, um... you didn't know?"
"no, i didn't know... i think you're cute, for what it's worth."
"oh?"
"yeah. you know, maybe we could talk about this another time? i don't feel like this is the most appropriate setting for this conversation."
"agreed... wait, so you're not, like, gonna run to HR or something, or-- i have a chance?"
"yeah, you have a chance. you're a fucking disaster, though..." you turn back to the door, but throw one more sentence over your shoulder. "oh, and dazai, you know we don't have an HR department."
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justpeaxchy · 3 months ago
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I heard you accepted opinions than httyd, could I ask for one? maybe a headcanoon about Hiccup x reader, maybe "how Hiccup would show love to the reader or what would happen if he was jealous", thank you for considering it.
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Warnings(?): Hiccup is a lil jealous. A/n: thank you for the request <3! I hope I brought what you were asking for with the headcanons! (I feel like it's a bit short, but here you go! Notes: takes place after httyd 2 and before the plot of httyd 3.
Jealousy has a sword
First off, Hiccup wouldn't be one to get jealous that quickly, although he is protective and such, he trusts you to know that you won't do anything that'll purposefully hurt him in that way.
This doesn't mean he can ignore the pricking feelings of jealousy whenever someone or something else is taking up a lot of your time - more than usual.
He has a habit of checking on you throughout the day, even if his schedule is brimmed with chiefly duties, it's his desire to make sure you're just overall okay. So when he finds himself being more occupied throughout the day and gets the word that you're spending your time with other people, he feels somewhat guilty that he can't be that person who's giving you some attention.
Then the jealousy kicks in.
Especially if it's Eret; he trusts the guy now but he isn't dumb - almost everyone says he is extremely handsome and well-built. He knows you wouldn't do anything with him but he just doesn't like it if he's the one who's with you the most throughout your daily tasks.
"So, how was your day?" He'd ask. You hummed, embracing him into a warm hug that he initiated. "It was nice. I got to go on patrol with Astrid, help put out a couple of fires - again - and, oh, Eret helped me a bit with my sword fighting. After that I was in-"
"Wait, wait, wait. You said who helped you out?" Hiccup slightly broke out of the hug to look at you as you questioningly gazed back at him.
"Uhm, Eret?" You remained still in your spot as you watched him deeply sigh, his head turning towards the ground, allowing his hair to barely brush against your face. "Is ... something the matter..?"
Hiccup shook his head, his hair tickling your nose in the slightest, as he lifted his eyes to meet yours while he spoke hesitantly: "N-no, I just-" he sighed once again as he stared at you, fumbling over his words. As though he had given up on speaking, he gently pulled you closer, allowing your lips to meet. The kiss held an earnestness and passion that was disguised by the delicate way he handled you. He took his time pulling away from you, only doing it because of the necessary oxygen you both needed while he took in every detail on your face.
"Nothing's wrong.. I suppose.. but you do know that you can always come to me for that kind of stuff, right?" He leaned his forehead against yours, auburn hair mixing with yours at the touch.
You were flustered at his response, fighting against the temptation to stutter in your speech; "Yeah, I know... but you're more busy now and I wouldn't want to make you feel more stressed or anything-"
Hiccup was quick to interrupt you as he shut down your statement: "No. You wouldn't be doing anything bad to me if you came and asked for my help in something. I want you to do that." His answer seemed to be more urgent than he wanted, making him clear his throat from the embarrassment that began to creep upon him, "W-when you're a available, that is.." He let out a breath that looked as though he were exhaling all negative feelings away. "Y'know what, I'm making a new plan. From now on, we'll meet every day to better improve your sword techniques. Sound good?"
You were shocked, to say the least, by his answer. It took a lot of convincing to tell him that it shouldn't be every single day this happens, for the sake of his schedule and the things he has to do on certain occasions. He's the Chief now, not a teenage kid running away from his problems anymore - which made him a little bit sour when he thought about it.
In the end, after practicing your sword fighting every other day, he just went right back into doing it everyday instead. Even moreso after Snotlout had tried to spar with you. Hiccup felt more "entitled" to do that specific activity with you - for some odd reason.
(He just really likes to do this with you, especially with Inferno.)
"Hiccup, it's not like we don't see each other everyday as it is-"
"Shush. We're gonna meet everyday and work on this. It's for your benefit anyways. "
He definitely feels like it's one of the ways he can show his love for you, if not the most important one: by giving you his time.
(That's why he's so protective over being the person that helps you with your sword fighting.)
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buttercupblu · 5 months ago
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Satoru's Psyche|Escalating
"Should I really have to suffer for my actions?"
Previous SessionSession 2 of 10|Next Session
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🗂️Patient Chart Update: Patient Gojo displayed extremely flirtatious and unruly behavior during the first half of his visit. Mentions of escape and kid-napping were noted as well as enforced close proximity with his nurse. Threatening remarks were also made at the end of his lunch in response to mentions of disciplinary action. Patient is scheduled for a bath but is pending the possibility of negative punishment to instill corrective behaviors. 📋Length of Session (w.c): 8.3k out of "i said we will cross that bridge when we get to it 😊" 💊Intake Chart (tags): mild violence but no in-action descriptors, coercion, manipulation, drug use, angst, unwatched close contact and touch, nudity, mentally unstable Gojo, Nurse!Reader ✏️Doctor's angel’s note: i hope you know what you're doing, Nurse 🎼Waiting room music: Overheated|Billie Eilish
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Choose wisely.
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Hunger stirs in your tummy, and Gojo's words sit with you through lunch. Your spoon clinks around the bowl, stirring the soup growing colder by the second though the growls from your stomach are too obnoxious to be ignored. But your mind wanders.
You're stuck. Earlier, you were all for serving up justice on a silver platter, but now you're seriously second-guessing your "genius" idea to punish Gojo by making him someone else's problem.
As if anyone will be crazy enough to say yes.
Everyone already avoids his wing like the plague. It's kind of an unspoken fact that you are Gojo's one and only. The only staff he allows near him. Anyone else would be playing with fire.
And if someone is brave enough to willingly throw themselves into the lion's den, they definitely can't be new. New to nursing—new to the ward. High expertise is needed here. Someone seasoned—experience which you lack yourself—otherwise, they won't last a second with Gojo.
It'll be way too easy for him to make them snap, like tossing a bone to a dog.
"Persephone." Yuko brings you out of your coma.
You perk up, instinctively smiling. "Hey, what's up?"
"You tell me," she snorts. "You've been playing with your food like break isn't over in 10 minutes." She touches your arm. "Everything ok?"
It's written all over your face, huh? You could deflate right now.
This is why Yuko is your favorite co-worker. Always reading you like a book without you needing to say a word. Quick to call anything off out.
Leaning back in your chair, you huff, rubbing circles into your temples to relieve the headache you didn't know you had.
"Yeah, yeah," you begin, "It's just—" You stop, her eyes hold so much concern and you've barely opened your mouth. Not sure if you should now because you know what kind of person Yuko is.
And if she knew even half of what you don't tell her during your lunch breaks spent complaining about work, she'd hang Gojo out to dry if she could. She often makes it very clear she hates you have to deal with him at all.
"—I'm just a bit tired. Gojo's scheduled for a bath later, him and two others. Gojo's easy but...I don't know. I feel slower than usual today. Definitely won't get home until late, again, because of all these sponge baths." You cringe at the last part.
Aside from trying to keep Yuko cool, you also don't want to risk the news getting back to the Director who could take you off of Gojo completely. No one else can take your place. And who knows what would happen if you disappeared from his roster for good?
How would his threats manifest?
Yuko scoffs, waving her hand.
"Gojo and easy do not go together," and you both shake your heads and laugh. "But I get it. You did come in super early."
"Thought there'd be less of us," you sigh.
"Sonya's been on our asses lately, right? But hey, she finally got us all here."
"A little too late. The damage is done," you pout, resting your elbows on the table, realizing you've accidentally grown used to chaos and ever-changing schedule.
You routinely plan ahead to make sure you can stand up when people fall short. Constantly putting yourself on the back burner seems to be a thing that always set you back.
"Sooo, you just need rest, ya? Nothing else? Gojo—" there she goes "—been 'okay' with you lately?"
Your heart skips. "Ya. he isn't so bad today," you lie, "I'd just love to be home on time for once. Maybe even a bit early, I'm soo close. Overtime's been wringing my neck for weeks."
Yuko looks at you with puppy dog eyes. And not in a "I feel sorry for you" kind of way, but one that almost makes you feel bad for not telling her the whole truth.
"Here," she pushes your soup towards you, "How about I do Gojo's bath and you get an early start on my last two? That way you can at least binge that show you won't shut up about later." She smiles.
You immediately protest.
There's no way you can do that to her.
Yuko never even crossed your mind and was far from your first pick, not because she can't handle him but because she's your friend. Not just a colleague, but someone you actually care about more than anyone else in this run-down job even if she doesn't feel the same.
She's too good of a person, and you'd be the Devil Incarnate if you let her do something so risky. Especially when you can just suck it up and get it over with.
"Woah, woah, it's just a bath, calm down," she says, taking your hands in hers as you ramble on, trying to convince her that you'll be fine or that you'll find someone else. Burdening her is simply out of the question.
"Who else but me, Seph'?" and she tilts her head, "You don't you think I'm as good as you?" And the way she says it, giving you that look she does when you're being stubborn, dares you to challenge her.
Now you really have to think about what to say.
Goddamn it, you regret saying anything at all, but Yuko's so motherly, how could you resist? Hiding from her is impossible, she would've sniffed you out sooner or later.
Easing your pains when she can is her specialty—helping to calm and settle you down when you blow things out of proportion.
Could this be one of those moments? Or are Gojo's words more than just hot air?
The back and forth is killing you, but the combination of Yuko's reassuring touch and your gurgling stomach puts the final nail in the coffin as she reminds you of the time.
Eyes wide, you look at the clock, ticking away faster than you realized, then back at your lukewarm soup.
Denying that you need help would be silly because technically it's true. You probably should've asked the Director for a little Gojo break forever ago, even if just for a few hours a few times a week. It would be better than nothing because if you can't function, Gojo can't be cared for.
So, who better to help bridge that gap for you than Yuko?
The gutsy woman has been your rock ever since you started at the ward, having your back and sticking with you through tough times when staff constantly dips in and out of the facility like a rotating door, unable to handle the job.
Yuko's a real day one, and next to you, she's the most competent nurse in these walls, fully equipped with a "take-no-shit" attitude that routinely keeps her patients in check.
When you really think about it, it'd be silly, downright irresponsible to trust anyone else.
Her offer is simply too good to dismiss.
"Thank you, Yuko," you cave, grabbing your spoon and finally allowing yourself to enjoy your meal. "You're...amazing. I don't deserve you."
She looks on happily. "Just promise me you'll take some personal time after this," she insists, worry evident in her voice. "We both know how much you care, but even superheroes need rest." She's too kind and right in more ways than one. "Besides, I think Gojo will like me, ya? I'm cool. I'm fun. He'll like a friend of friend?"
You roll your eyes—ya, totally, cool people definitely say they're cool.
Not knowing whether to joke back or wave her off, you softly smile at her concern before nodding, vowing to make good on your promise and feel a bit lighter knowing your wish for early release will actually come true.
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Maybe.
The latest threat to your miracle in the making is Mr. Hampton, who is personally making it his business to drag the already long day by its edges, almost bringing time to a standstill with the way he's handling his bath.
Enormous and lumbering, the man Yuko usually deals with took his sweet time gathering his things and even longer trekking down the seemingly endless halls leading to the bathing area. Occupying every inch of the space like those massive trucks that hog the interstate, yet inching along at a pace that makes a snail look like it's in a sprint.
All that was missing were the yellow hazard lights.
Oh no, please, take your time, you think, watching Mr. Hampton clean each limb painstakingly s l o w in a tub that's comically too small for him. You may have been able to rush through Yuko's first patient, but this one wanted all that time back.
His pace resembles a giant's, and his cheery, nonsensical hums echo around the hollow chambers and lull you to sleep, turning your eyes into bricks under the spell of his melody. Perfect timing for the energy drinks from early to crash you out, tag teaming with the chair beneath you that feels a bit too soft as you lean over the tub, willing the colossal man to hurry up.
Warm water flows over your skin as you scrub circles on his neck, deciding to bite the bullet and take over the bath so he can play with the bubbles and get out when you hear a blood-curdling scream.
Your entire body goes rigid, shock reverberating through your spine and forcing you to halt as your mind goes blank. But steamy water brings you back to life, drenching your shirt and upper thighs when Mr. Hampton jumps from the noise.
The rude awakening makes you lock in.
The scream. It sounds like...no, you know it came from the west wing...where Gojo is.
And Yuko.
Hurried steps rush past your door, sounds of multidirectional distress and frantic shouts echoing through the corridor—staff members and patients alike sweep into a whirlwind of panic.
You're number one, dropping the scrubber and scrambling to help Mr. Hampton out of the tub, hands shaking as he grips them.
A security guard bursts into the room, face ashen and jaw tight.
"Nurse! We need everyone in the west wing, immediately!" The command is sharp, laced with an urgency you've never seen before.
And immediately feel responsible for.
"There's been an incident."
Without another thought, you wrap Mr. Hampton in a towel, trying your best to assure him that everything is fine when your obviously trembling body says nothing is. His confused gaze follows you as you lead him back to his room, the commotion in the air moving him a lot faster than earlier before you rush back out and head straight for the west wing—where chaos reigns supreme.
The usually pristine floors, normally squeaky clean due to lack of traffic, are now barely visible. Staff members crowd the familiar hall for the first time since Gojo made it his own, filling the space with more bodies than you're used to and making it difficult to find the source of trouble.
Not like you need to. The truth is painfully clear, and it's disrespectful to even pretend you don't know exactly what went wrong.
You push through the masses, clumsily bumping shoulders, your heart beating into your ears and making the world seem quiet as you inch closer and closer to disaster. Dragging imaginary shackles on your feet until you all but collapse once you spot it.
Gojo—barely restrained by guards, straitjacket nowhere in sight—standing absolutely furious.
And for the first time today, time seems to slow down, your mouth suddenly becoming dry when you look past him.
Yuko.
Halfway out the door to his room. Sprawled out on the ground. Bruised, unconscious, and no signs of breathing.
Your hands fly to your lips, mouth agape. Murmurs from the crowd swirl around you before attendants rush to Yuko's side, knocking into your pathetic frame as you stand too frozen to move.
They gently pick her up, careful to handle her motionless body and place her on a stretcher. Her usually vibrant face is drained of color, twisting the dagger in your chest when you spot the subtle rise and fall of her chest. Fighting for breath.
Fighting.
It hits you like a train.
Someone as kind as her, always greeting you with warmth and empathy and capacity every time she sees you, should never have to lift a finger let alone fight for her life. The sight is too much to bear.
Waves of helplessness crash over you and you can't even look at her. Regretting with every ounce of your being that you sent her in your place. Knowing this could happen. Concerned only with your silly wants and needs.
But you're so confused.
The ward should have weakened Gojo—Yuko should have been fine. The only threat Gojo has up his sleeve is mental torture but Yuko might as well be Freud. Her mind is sound, strong.
And that's where you fucked up, forgetting that Gojo's pure strength, especially when he's lost his fucking mind and triggered, is stronger.
Even with his security system in place, the devil is still powerful enough on his own. And like this was some sick and twisted experiment to help you figure that out, Yuko was the one to pay the price.
"I warned, I WARNED YOU!" Gojo's words pierce the overlapping voices like a sword, breaking your shock and drawing everyone's attention to the strange interaction between the two of you. "I don't like to be touched by strangers, Nurse." Guards struggle to restrain him as he pulls away.
All eyes fall on you and the stares are intense. Confusion and judgment.
Why was Yuko here in the first place?Where was Seph’?How’d he get out?How did this happen? 
Whether the murmurs are real or in your head, the effect is all the same, and you wish you could just completely vanish. Standing like a deer in headlights—and they're so fucking bright.
But Gojo is brimming with malice and amusement, chaotic energy pulsing from the hellish man and threatening to send sparks flying. Daring someone to be brave and push the button.
But despite his outward display of dominance, the pure rage on his face that makes you feel sick to your stomach about every decision you've ever made, there's something...uncertain lurking behind those fiery eyes.
Something like...apprehension.
Like he knows he's done something wrong.
Yet, words escape you, as if anything needs to or even could be said. But soon, fear and guilt turn to anger, threatening to consume you. Ready to eat you alive and spit out the bones with disgust because you are not a victim.
You have no right to stand here, spineless, shocked, or feeling even a little sorry for yourself. Holding back tears because you know what you've done.
Your fists clench, unsure how to deal with it, but there's fire in your eyes because someone needs to pay.
But then you exhale, thoughts shifting to Yuko as you take a good look around at what happened the last time you decided to take things into your own hands. All of your actions, even now, are rooted in selfishness. Like you've learned nothing.
Pushing down the knot growing in your stomach, you turn away to follow the medics, deciding your friend needs you more than you need revenge. Gojo doesn't deserve any more of your attention, even if it means risking your job or life to turn your back on him.
And there's nothing Gojo hates more than being ignored.
Struggled and strained noises grow louder. Guards tighten their grip on the fuming man whose raw strength outnumbers thousands of them even without his cursed energy.
You look back, their determination to keep him contained making you nervous. You don't anyone else to get hurt and Gojo is fully exploiting that.
You're painfully aware that your decisions have put you in this position, watching the guards' valiant but increasingly pointless effort to prevent Gojo from causing further harm. But it's obviously a losing fight, and the unease on their faces is unmistakably clear.
You wonder why they don't just run like hell.
"Let's go," a guard barks, but Gojo remains fixed in place. Moving a boulder would be easier.
"No, I'm filthy," Gojo protests, smirking, "And if I don't have my bath soon, there will be hell to pay."
Seeing no one else in the room, his eyes are locked only on you, his expression a menacing promise that would send anyone else running for the hills. A look that says, "Try that shit again, and there will be casualties instead of mercy."
Reinforcements are called but it won't be enough. The goddamn military wouldn't be enough. Gojo is...the strongest, after all.
"Stop."
Your cry freezes the room. Everything goes silent.
You hesitate, fuck, what should you do?
What can you do? No one else can suffer—no one else should suffer. Because of you.
Taking a deep, shaky breath, you silently apologize to Yuko, swallowing a lump instead of looking back.
"I'll do it," you say firmly, "Just stop this and...and I'll give you your bath. Please—" The sharpest pang you've ever felt cuts through you. "—just don't hurt anyone else."
Pathetic. But necessary.
He looks into your pleading eyes with surprise, amazement even, before smiling.
The submission in your voice sounds better than anything he could ever imagine. A sweet tones that feed his already inflated ego.
Unsure of how to proceed, the guards exchange uneasy glances.
Gojo's strength is undeniable, that much is evident, and restraining him forever is simply not possible.
You know offering to give him what he wants is risky as hell...but this is your doing. Your mess to clean up.
So you squeeze your sweaty palms and give a decisive nod, signaling at the guards to let him go. They hesitate a second, then reluctantly agree, stepping back and leaving Gojo standing smugly before you.
Closing your eyes, you breathe, hating to have to look at him, but needing to stay strong. For Yuko. For yourself. And everyone else in the ward.
But Gojo's satisfied grin says it all. He's won this round.
You're ready to get the next over with.
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The squeaking of your shoes has never been this loud, each echo bouncing off the empty halls and reminding you of how alone you are.
Alone—with a psychopath.
A bit more docile, doped-up psychopath but, the man could probably still rip someone's head clean off if he wanted to.
Still, Gojo despises anything that alters his body—mentally, physically, all of the above. Alcohol, medication, coffee, energy drinks—anything that threatens his need for absolute control.
But he also needed to compromise, and you refused to be alone with him again unless he took something stronger. Otherwise, it would be you, all the guards in the ward, and a pay-per-view premiere of his bath time.
He knew he had to agree because his ass is not for free, but only if you took it as well.
You blinked, hard.
You knew he would be skeptical—hell, it could be poison, and he wouldn’t blame you. But to suggest something so ridiculous?
"Half, then," he said, as if that made his suggestion any less idiotic, but, as you waited for your supervisor to dismiss the insane idea, the back and forth with Gojo actually didn't save you. And you didn't need to ask why. The entire ward shoots daggers at you any time someone walks by now.
Your supervisor reassured you that you'd be fine, the mild tranquilizer would be out of your system by the end of the day, then she patted your back as if to say, "Lay in the bed you made."
It felt unreal, holding the familiar pill between your fingers, one you were used to dishing out but now had to take.
With a quick snap, you broke it in half, holding his half out to the leering man. Gaze unwavering as he leaned forward and parted his lips, waiting. Taking a deep breath, you placed them both on your tongues, in disbelief at your reality, but Gojo's focus was elsewhere, not wasting this prime opportunity to rattle you more and taste you, closing his lips around your fingertip with a quick lick before you snatched away.
But it wasn’t quick enough to avoid the tingles shooting up your arm as you swallowed, no longer needing the water you had set aside, and a confusing mix of emotions churned as the tingles spread throughout your body.
Making good on his promise, he swallowed his own, still watching you with a knowing glint in his eyes. Like he knows what he does to you. And despite just witnessing this man's violence firsthand, you'd give anything to deny that he still has an effect on you. Hating yourself for being more concerned with the way he looked at you and the lingering sensation on your skin than the tranquilizer now coursing through your system.
The guards carefully lead you and Gojo to his private bathroom—they're more there for show than for protection, but you'll take what you can get, and they keep a firm grip on his replacement straitjacket.
You trail behind, mind buried with thoughts of what to say once you're really alone with him.
The door shuts behind you, followed by the familiar sound of a series of locks clicking shut. "We'll be right outside," one of the guards mutters, eyes shifting between you and Gojo, a stereotypical warning lacing his voice, but even he probably doesn't believe it.
"Perv," Gojo sneers and laughs, but you don't find a damn thing funny, the keys to his jacket digging into your palms as you spin around and face him, furious. What would be better? Slapping him, kicking him, or knocking his teeth out. Or should you be particularly evil and just let him sit in the shower, fully restrained and drenched in cold water and you let it rain down. None of the above will do you any good, but it'll show him exactly how done you are with his shit.
"That isn't funny. None of this is funny," it fumes out before you know you're speaking, "You've hurt someone—you hurt my friend." Your rage echos through the vast bathroom.
Gojo's laugh fades, his smug expression slipping from his face. Even you're surprised.
...oh shit.
You're actually confronting him.
The intense words burn through his usual arrogance, leaving a heavy, uncomfortable silence between you.
Then, for a fleeting second, his face does something weird.
Something you haven't seen before as his eyebrows draw together. Is that...regret?
"I'm sorry."
The record scratches. You’re fully positive you must be dreaming.
But when he doesn’t make a joke or even crack a smile, you squint at him.
The words are muttered and reluctant, but there they are, hanging in the air between you.
"It...won't happen again."
And he's serious, the same seriousness you see when his heart races as you take his vitals...but why? Because an apology? From him?? Unheard of.
Gojo has said some nasty things to you in the past that you've immediately scolded him for, but he's never apologized. He'd make a note when certain jokes didn't land, but he never took them back, preferring to cut out his own tongue than to waste his breath being sorry.
You know better than to take anything Gojo says at face value, but...what the fuck??? You almost feel offended.
He has to be joking, fucking with you to dig even deeper under your skin.
Or is he?
Fuck, you don't know how to feel.
He's so good at that, stealing the air back and hanging his words in them. Tempting you to pause and even consider if he ever truly means them. If he could mean them. The mind games are endless.
But then, the familiar cockiness returns and overshadows your doubts, twisting your stomach into knots with that familiar smile of his.
"Now," he says, strutting towards the stalls, "let's get this bath started, shall we?" And his easy, but confident steps call you to follow, a stark reminder of who you're dealing with. But he never knows when to quit. "Or should I really have to suffer for my actions?" and the bastard pouts.
Though you know he's being sarcastic and not to feed into his taunts, you can't help but wonder—what would suffering even look like for someone like Gojo?
Violence? Physical pain? A slow and agonizingly painful death?
But the guy is damn near invincible. What on earth could hurt him?
Whatever it is, it would have to be his absolute worst nightmare, but nothing comes to mind at the moment other than frustration because you have to keep making choices.
Return his energy or keep it professional? Tolerance or revenge?
"Apologizing won't cut it," you snap and gesture at his jacket, wondering how the hell he slipped out of the first one without leaving a trace. "And no tricks, or those guards will be back in here faster than you can tell another lame joke."
Smooth.
Gojo sighs sooo dramatically, like he can see straight through your kitty claws. "Fine, fine. Loosen up," he drags, "I won't cause any trouble. Just don't go getting any ideas now, Nurse." and he winks.
He's insufferable—but despite your smoldering anger, tendrils of doubt still creep in.
Your fingers slightly tremble as you begin to unfasten his straps, but each click feels a bit like victory, a fragile illusion of your 'control'—at least for now—because at the end of the day, Gojo had chosen you to listen to. And after today, he's sure you won't forget there isn't room for anyone else.
The jacket falls with a heavy thud, your eyes immediately scanning his upper body in search of any signs of injury or stress. The cascading bruises on his arms surprise you.
They feel so feeble in your hands; the evidence of him not as invincible as he seems is jarring. Pale, weak, and resting between your fingers. Devoid of the power that makes him so feared.
"Never seen bruises before," he tilts his head, "at least not on me"
You hope Yuko was at least partly responsible for the marks on the villain, but they appear self-inflicted, and he's not as mobile.
Fuck, now you'll have to bathe him too. Still, it's strange, seeing him like this. Even weirder knowing that he could still do damage in this state and you can't shake the feeling of this temporary 'truce'. If it isn't obvious by now, you've learned that Gojo always has something up his sleeve.
Warm water soothes you a bit, flowing over your fingers as it fills the large white tub—pristine, imported from somewhere far away, and standing on decorative claw feet. Your eyes wouldn't stop rolling the first time you saw it, completely annoyed with Gojo's over-the-top alterations and sense of style, but you'd be a liar if you said you never thought about sinking your body into it.
The best you could do was cope with the little porcelain tub in your apartment, and you get lost thinking about how you'd love to take a long, hot, and steamy bath when you get home—if you'll even have the energy. There's no way you'll be leaving early now, not like you deserve it, and you feel sick for even thinking about it. You doubt you'll even have a job tomorrow.
You look so defeated Gojo thinks, sauntering forward and lifting the hem of his shirt. You turn away, focusing instead on the temperature of the water, but the rustling sound of his shirt being pulled overhead and pants falling to the ground warms your cheeks.
His physique certainly isn't lacking, even in his current state, but still, you wonder how such a slim but toned frame could be so...powerful.
Could you be more obvious? Your flickering eyes are so telling, shamefully darting between him and the water, but he catches your gaze from the corner of his eye as if he's read your mind. How cute, he thinks, trying to hide away your thoughts.
Clearing your throat, you toss in his loofah. "Well...go on. It's ready." But Gojo only grins, amused by your attempts to look away despite seeing his muscled frame a number of times. Relishing in the fact that he still manages to fluster you.
"Your shirt," he eyes your top, "Your pants. Looks like you've already started without me."
The water stains from earlier sit beautifully across your chest, not yet fully dry, and drawing his eyes to your semi-erect nips.
His teeth tug at his bottom lip, eyes shamelessly raking over your hefty chest. "Always such a tease, aren't you, Nurse?"
You grit your teeth, cursing the conflict swirling in your stuttering heart, fully aware of the thin line between professionalism and this game of intimacy he refuses to stop playing. Everything is always a game no matter the circumstances. And he loves to push your buttons.
"Just get in, Gojo," you order, and after what feels like an eternity, the silence is broken by the sound of splashing water as he steps into the bath.
He slowly sinks in, sighing at the warmth of the water. Ringlets of steam engulf him, almost making his silky white hair disappear with it.
His arms string over the rim of the tub, a look of relaxation resting on his face as if he's had a long, hard day. You resist the urge to slap it off.
Sudsy bubbles form from the solution you pour under the faucet, hoping to shield your eyes from his body. You've seen enough today and expect the mini-rebellious act to piss him off, but as the bubbles grow, so do his eyes. Picking up a handful, he actually starts playing with them.
"Nice touch," he adds, blowing them right into your face, and you watch with a tight lip as he decorates the bathroom with them, knowing you'll be the one to clean it all up.
He sits a crown on his head and gives himself a bubble beard, nipping your nose with some that you're quick to wipe away, and his pale eyes flutter and settle on you in a curious way.
His arms flex as he leans over the edge—steam-slicked sweat dripping down his face that he doesn't bother to wipe away. "I'm ready for my sponge bath," he says, and if it was hard to take him seriously before, it's damn near impossible now—especially with that ridiculous bubble mustache.
Sickening, him still being so playful, so unserious, at a time like this.
You know Gojo's unhinged, yeah, quote, "mentally unwell and a literal danger to society", but to nearly take someone's life and then make jokes afterward?
God, you feel so stupid, walking around him like you were the shit but with the wrong guard up the whole time, playing right into his hands and accidentally rewarding this grown-ass man who likes to play with suds.
The reality of your circumstances replays in your head, the story of how you ended up here, coddling this monster, and you're still confused as hell as to why it had to be you.
Then again, this is what you signed up for...right? To heal. To help those who can't help themselves. To offer redemption some sort of redemption no matter how sick and twisted the person in need is.
With your loofah in hand, you resist the urge to roll your eyes for the 400th time today and keep your morals in mind. "Keep talking like that and I'll stop, Gojo," you say, reluctantly drenching the tool in soap before proceeding to do your job.
Gently washing his back, he sinks into your touch, closing his eyes and letting his body completely rest on the cool cast iron, breathing. Feeling like he's won no matter what you say because your scrubs feel like magic.
Across his arms and over his broad shoulders, you work your way down, bubbles glistening in your trail as you're careful not to miss a single inch of skin but don't linger too long.
Every now and then, you catch glimpses of raised marks between the foam, and because you hate yourself, your brain absolutely refuses to give you a break. You have to give kudos to his dedication to his craft. The muscle definition, the scar tissue telling stories of battles won, the evidence of his past before corruption—everything it takes to be a hero.
It's unsettling, yet fascinating, the polarity between his beauty and his monstrous deeds.
You've never really noticed because this level of care is another first for you. Usually, Gojo just hops into the shower and takes care of himself while you wait outside—easy and thorough but always taking his sweet time, all while loudly singing some annoying song that inevitably ends up stuck in your head.
But after today, it'll be impossible to trust him or you again, and the hushed whispers as the guards walked you both to the restrooms made that abundantly clear.
The pitiful thoughts seep into the way you hesitantly clean him, moving down to his chest and abs while making sure to avoid more sensitive areas, but the malicious glint in his eyes is unmistakable.
"Whatsamatter, Nurse?" Gojo taunts, feeling you slow around his stomach, "Afraid of gettin' too close?" And you can't believe you're praying for a speedy recovery for this monster so he can handle this himself again.
You ignore his comment and try to get this over with as quickly as possible, feeling humiliated enough as it is and he can sense it, mocking you with a laugh.
"You're so uptight. Can't you just relax and enjoy the view?"
God, please make him shut up, begging for relief so you won't scrub his cocky brow right off his face. "Just doing my job," you mutter, twice squeezing the loofah that feels a little funny in your hand as the soapy water rinses his chest.
It feels heavenly on his skin, but the subtle change in your movements makes his brows furrow. Slowing, more deliberate, heavy as if you're wading through molasses. You keep adjusting your grip but the material feels so strange—the texture almost too soft like it could melt into your palm.
Your breath catches when you brush his skin, not realizing how close your fingers drifted to the edge of the sponge, and though it was only a second, it sends an unexpected jolt through his chest.
The muscle relaxers. How could you have already forgotten, you both think.
But Gojo, ever observant, doesn't miss a thing.
His eyes narrow slightly as he watches you. "Feeling a little funny, Nurse?" His velvet voice teases.
"I'm fine," you lie, though you couldn't be less certain as the muscles in your hands start to relax more than you intended, the sponge gliding over his abs, and down his sides, the rhythm almost hypnotic and making his head fall back. You try to push through the haze, to finish quickly and be free of him, but you're losing the battle against numbness and heightened awareness.
And fuck, he has to bite his lip at your touch that suddenly feels so intense, a sensation too good to keep to himself, and one that you obviously need to stop being such a tight-ass.
You need to loosen up in a way that medicine can't help. And Gojo knows just the trick.
He licks his lips, tongue curling over his canine before splashing a wave of water on you in one swoop.
Saying you gasp is an understatement as the steamy wash drenches your face and front once again, setting a new record as you're hit not once, but twice in a day. The loofah slips from your hand as you instinctively reach up to shield yourself, but Gojo is quicker, wrapping his hands around your wrists and holding you in place.
A scream is ready to surge from your body when Gojo maneuvers both of your wrists into one hand, placing a finger to your lips.
"Ssssh ssh ssh ssh ssh," he hushes, his voice a little too calm, "I'm not going to hurt you." A lone droplet hangs from your eyelash and he swipes it. "I just want you to listen."
You freeze, your nerves on fire as you're forced into close proximity with him for the second time today, inches away from his face that gradually softens.
Though you can easily call for help, you know better than to argue—he knows you know better too but he never felt threatened in the first place. Besides, he can feel your breathing slowing, the effects of the pill combined with his firm hold sending a faint buzz from your wrists to your stomach, and his finger remains on your lips as he brings his closer.
His eyes flicker to your bottom lip. "You're so good at your job, Nurse," smoothly pulling it with his thumb. "That's why I like you. You're thorough but real. Just what I need to keep me sane."
Sane?
"Sane," he repeats like he's heard your thoughts. "Believe it or not, you keep me grounded...like a good boy. Be proud, not a single soul here or anywhere else can compare to me, let alone deal with me, and yet...here you are." He looks at you like you're a marvel. "You can handle that...can't you?"
Words fail you. This feels rhetorical. Why does he keep torturing you like this? What is it about you?
You haven't really thought about it since your first few weeks with him but now he's forcing you to think about the little 'power' he's given you that he can easily snatch back.
What happens if he decides to go further than flirting?
You can't handle it, any of this.
Hesitating, you're unsure of what to say but know it could never be the truth.
Gojo must sense it because he leans closer, his breath warm on your cheek.
"If you leave, I just might crack completely, beauty." A breath you didn't realize you were holding slips. "How do you think everyone else will do against me then, hmm?" Gojo knows he's a prodigy, but still manages to surprise himself sometimes, his eyes lingering over the spots on your uniform soaked through just enough to make the fabric cling—perfect aim.
Ice shoots up your spine from the heat of his unadulterated gaze, but you refuse to let him see you falter, and he can almost feel a prick from the daggers in your eyes.
"Oh, don't be like that," he purrs, thumbs grazing your wrists in a mockingly gentle touch. "We all have our boundaries, right? I thought communication was key in a relationship."
"Let go of me," you find your voice, "We're done here."
His head slightly tilts.
Look at you calling the shots, he thinks. So strong, so very serious.
"God, I can't help it," he breathes, "You're so fun to mess with."
He could laugh in your face, have his way with you, and show you that your resistance means nothing, but instead, he slowly releases your wrists and lies back against the tub. "I know you think about it—there's nothing wrong with a little fun...right?" and though the connection is severed, you don't know if it's the drugs or just him that makes his amplified touch linger as you sheepishly rub your wrists.
Gojo watches you blush red—thoughts you didn't know lived within you rushing to the forefront as if he's pushed a button.
Grimy, raw, unwanted thoughts of forbidden fruit, wandering hands, and stolen touches in the dark, wondering what his idea of "fun" is like under the sheets. With a psycho named Gojo.
You feel like you should throw up in disgust but the nausea never comes, burning hot between your legs instead.
Fuck, you have to get out of here.
You draw a breath, forcing away the torturous daydreams and quickly finish his bath.
"You should rest," you firmly say and pull the plug to let the tub drain. "And don't expect any more favors from me."
He sits up slow, his expression stone-cold as he slicks back his wet hair. Then he smiles. "I promise. Now dry me off?" he quips.
You ignore his request, swiftly handing him a towel before he can flash you. With a gruff, you lower to your knees, beginning to dry the floor of his messes and hoping to distract yourself from your questionable sanity.
The sounds of rustling fabric fill the chamber as he dries off, and once you figure it's safe, you look up to find a nude Gojo. Dripping with bubbles, hair plastered to his derpy face, and toned muscles, all the muscles, presenting themselves in all their glory.
The only things dry are his damn hands.
He throws the towel over his shoulder, sauntering towards you with a wicked grin.
"Well, aren't you gonna help me put this thing back on?" He nods at the jacket he knows is more bullshit than security. "Don't want you getting all worked up again."
The first time your brain registered that Gojo was flirting with you was on your third day as his nurse.
"Well, aren't you a breath of fresh air?" Gojo was sitting on his bed, leaning against the wall. It was the second time he'd noticed how sluggish you looked while tending to him, suggesting with a grin that you must be quite the party animal.
Ha. If only.
You tsked, tossing his bedsheets into the hamper, and assured him that your sleepy eyes and dragging feet were the result of long hours and running on fumes. Having time for fun was just a dream.
"I don't get out much myself," he says, alluding to the situation he's in, wearing sarcasm like a necklace. "I love a good night in as much as anyone else but, I don't know. The stuffiness hasn't grown on me yet."
You tugged the collar of your scrubs—the air did feel a bit thick, like the room hadn't been aired out in ages and you couldn't help but wonder how long he'd been sitting in it—how he could. That alone would be enough to drive you up a wall.
Sunlight flickered in your eyes, and you raised your hand to block it, noticing the small window perched above his chair.
"Let's open this then," you said, walking over and wrestling with the ancient wood for a moment before finally pulling the creaky flap up to the ceiling.
A sliver of your midriff peeked out as you stood on your toes to reach it, but what captured Gojo's attention most was the way the sun rays washed over your face. You scrunched your nose, the breeze sending wisps of your hair to tickle it, and he imagined the feel of your strands between his fingers.
The view was beautiful, you thought, hands gripping the warm bars. Trees surrounded the vast area, stretching out as far as you could see, the pathway to civilization completely covered in dense forest from this angle.
You never realized how high up his ward was—or how long the drop was from here.
"Too bad I'm not small enough to slip through those bars." He rubbed his stomach. "But you know me, 'Mr. BigBack.'"
He joked around as he usually did, looking to trigger your defenses, but your reaction was...odd.
Not only was this the first time anyone cared to do something so simple for Gojo, but it was also the closest anyone had gotten to him without their knees buckling.
The first two days of your trial, the Director had guards posted right outside of Gojo's door, their presence a constant reminder to stay alert and maintain a safe distance from the convict. Gojo was positive the mental barrier would keep a wall between you forever.
But then, you laughed. A real laugh. Snickery and cute. Finding his joke funny instead of threatening.
It surprised him, that sound, so natural and pure without hesitation. And he wanted to hear it again and again and again. "Who knew you could bring so much light into this place?" he sighed.
Later at lunch, you sat with Yuko, having your usual midday catch-up. You never start with yours but she, like most people in the ward then, was absolutely dying to hear about how you were dealing with the villain of the century.
"He's actually not so bad...yet. Corny, but," you took a pondering breath, "He kind of thanked me today?"
She immediately scoffed and waved you off, and who could blame her?
You were an anomaly, Gojo already showed that he was capable of mercy and now he was thanking you??
Being polite was too far of a stretch to believe, you must have been mistaken. But when you gave her the deets on why he'd do such a thing, she nearly choked on her apple. "He said that??"
"Ya?" You patted her back with a concerned look.
"Watch out, Casanova," she teased, clearing her throat with a nervous laugh.
Her comment threw you off for the rest of lunch, but when you thought about it later that night while surfing for new shows, a light bulb went off.
He flirted with you.
Thinking it was just another one of those literal dry-humor jokes or simply gratitude for making his stay a little less crappy, it flew right over your head. You always feel warm inside when you help people so you didn't think too much about it.
To you, it was just a kudos. Nothing more.
But the way Gojo stands in front of you now is everything.
As bold and brash as it gets.
Fuck. Me.
And your body betrays you, sending all of the vulnerable sensations you've been fighting to suppress from your soaking chest, tingling wrists, aching thighs, and heavy breath, straight to your throbbing clit.
Air escapes you and you couldn't feel more conflicted, scrambling to grab your supplies and leave.
Enough is enough. The guards outside can restrain him and escort him back to his room for all you care. You just have to get out of there.
Away from him.
Away from temptation.
Hot, overwhelming, guilty, mentally and physically unstable temptation.
In the quiet of the hallway a level below Gojo's ward, you lean against a wall, taking deep breaths and completely disgusted with yourself.
How are you supposed to keep dealing with this, with him?
This force that keeps pushing and pushing and pushing you to the edge until there's nowhere else to go. You can only imagine the hell the nurses he didn't like went through.
Taking care of him isn't getting any easier, and now you were fucking up and making mistakes.
But you're the only one who can do this. Who must.
So suck it up. Play along, Stop thinking only of yourself. Pretend.
Pretend.
Pretend?
...
What terrifies you the most is the thought that you may not have to.
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You keep your scrambled thoughts to yourself when you're called into your Director's office at the end of the day.
You tell him the same story you told Yuko and take full responsibility for what happened, blaming it on exhaustion and needing a break. Swearing to never let it happen again.
By some miracle, you get to keep your job, though your one wish to leave early ended up costing you an hour and a half of unpaid overtime, and almost a friendship.
When you finally get home, you collapse onto your bed—images of the day, the ward, and Yuko flooding your thoughts, refusing to be pushed aside. You tell yourself that it's just the guilt talking, just anxiety gnawing at your edges.
But then there's Gojo.
The most prominent one of all.
Staring you in the face with lifeless eyes and a ghostly smile. Tugging on your moral strings like a puppet.
When you close your eyes, you can't shake the feeling that he's waiting for you, a lurker in the shadows watching and anticipating your every move. Have you become predictable? Now you're wondering if you could do something he wouldn't expect.
Leave it. Leave it. Le—
You're scrolling through your phone on a deep-diving, scouring the web for any info on your tormentor.
His past, his affiliations, anything to tell you who Gojo was, and who he is now.
But the man is an anomaly.
Not much is known about him outside of mainstream news and internet rumors.
He's just this guy that kind of popped out of nowhere in the worst way possible, conveniently on the tail of what could have been the most devastating incident in the history of Tokyo.
The media says he's a hero gone rogue but not much else. They've damned him to hell and that was that. Even the Director disclosed very little about him during your briefing and you weren't allowed access to his files or records because it's all 'confidential'.
Nothing.
The more you search, you less that comes up. Not even silly conspiracy theories that you definitely thought would be riddling Reddit. The longer you scroll, the more you find yourself beginning to question your own mind. Your interest. Sweet little buds of obsession.
Even though you hated taking it earlier, you actually need the pill now more than ever to relax as sleep eludes you and your mind wanders to imaginary scenarios as you stare at the ceiling. 
Tomorrow, you'll have to face Gojo again. And the day after that and the day after that and every day after.
In between your nearly non-existent off days, you'll have to see him and decide what face you want to put on.
Because you simply cannot walk away.
After all, he's right—no one else can handle him like you can.
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extended angel's note:
when i originally decided to make this into short story, i had no plans on using a y/n perspective. it was just going to feature an OC name i’ve used in stories before, named Persephone, buuuut i decided to wanted to keep it immersive and include no physical descriptors/personality specifics bc i knew i wanted to upload it to tumblr. 
to keep it reader-friendly, yk? 
alas, Persephone has had her claws in me the entire time i’ve been editing and said with her whole chest that i couldn't just dismiss her like that chile. so i decided changed the perspective but keep her name in place of y/n. 
you won’t see it too often in the story bc it’s not super significant or said a lot in general, bUT it is relevant for a certain moment later in the story. you’ll know when you know 🤭. 
anyway, hope it doesn't bother you guys too much. and def feel free to mentally plug your name when you see it to keep yourself grounded into the story.
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tag list p.1: @reddiamondjazz @kiwismoother @rune1920 @blkkizzat @suguwife
@xerroe @enthyn @gloomuri671 @ressyshi @startatdawn
@khenanadeche @heijihatsutori @inluvkai @ixqiix @strawnanamilk
@rosso-seta @05-simply-06-simping @sims-4lifers @bratidol @rh-tg1
@hyunsuks-beanie @n1vi @luna-v-roiya @neteyamsluvr111 @supsiii
@natadecoco30 @chiyokoemilia @ririoutspoken @kyoxko @strawberrymilkshakes-posts
@nen-nyy @cinnamorochiroll @kazeniya @maybe7tommorow @sxnkuna
@misoyuh @lupitalove @sebastianlover @gojosatorubrainrot @sleepiebunniee
@mmmidkman @theonecrackhead @thathorsegotpoobrain @iveivory @samistar
@yuuan-66 @gojoslefttoenail @soyalovestoyap @winkwonks-world @thebiggestsimpforyou 
636 notes · View notes
gggukniverse · 1 year ago
Text
self fulfillment needs | myg
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title: self fulfillment needs
pairing: yoongi x reader (+ implied jungkook x reader)
series: basic needs !!!
genre: m, smut, roommates au
summary: two weeks after the kitchen incident where you had sex with your roommate while your other roommate watched you, things seem the same as always but also not the same at all. you try to approach the subject to only cause a fight and another sexual encounter.
warnings: dom!yoongi, sub!reader, yoongi is bi, jungkook is confused my baby :(, sexual tension, dirty talk, she actually tries to dom yoongi at first but... haha, fingering, unprotected sex (pls be safe), a lil edging, hair pulling, teasing, yoongi himself is a warning, choking, face slapping, praising, degradation, he calls reader a slut, begging, spanking, p*ssy slapping, yoongi has a... piercing 🥴, they talk abt jk during sex, mentions of yoongi x jungkook, yoongi is so sweet after sex i'm sad :(
wordcount: 8.8k
note: hi !!! i'm back !! first of all, this is the second part to basic needs so please read that first because you're probably not gonna understand half of this chapter. omg guys this chapter is insane i cant even look at myself in the mirror after writing all of that. i'm still not convinced if it turned out okay, it could've been a lot better, but i hope you enjoy it !!!
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it’s been two weeks since the kitchen incident. and things have been weird.
it’s kind of a tricky situation because yoongi and jungkook act just the same as always towards you, like that night never happened in the first place. you find it troubling at first but you soon realize you wouldn’t even know how to approach them about what you did in that kitchen so you just let things flow. the problem is how they act around each other.
you wouldn’t consider yourself being extremely close to them, but with over two years of living together you’ve obviously come to know their dynamic. and you know they’re friends, you’re pretty sure they have different friend groups but you know they are friends and they get along way better than you do with any of them. that’s why you quickly catch on the weird vibe there seems to be between them now.
you’re used to waking up in the morning and finding them having breakfast in the kitchen together while talking about things you don’t really understand, but these days you walk into the kitchen first thing in the morning and don’t find any of them there. and it’s not just about breakfast, it’s about the weird tension between them when you see them bumping in the corridor, the excuses they make up not to be in the living room with you at the same time and the moments you see yoongi trying to make up conversation and jungkook just hums or gives a cold answer before leaving the room.
the worst thing is that your brain tells you it must be your fault. because it must be, right? before the kitchen incident everything was just fine but now that can barely stay in the same room for more than 2 minutes together.
and you don’t mean to snap at them but you can’t stop yourself from doing it one specific morning.
“what the hell is wrong with you two?”
the initial response you get is jungkook choking on his cereal and yoongi turning away from the coffee machine to look at you with such a surprised expression you guess he didn’t expect you to say that.
“what?” jungkook is the first one to talk as he wipes at his chin with a napkin.
“no, don’t try to act dumb now,” you tell him and hear yoongi snort. “you’ve been acting weird as fuck for the past two weeks and i’m so tired of it.”
“i’m not acting weird.” yoongi mumbles as he goes back to the coffee machine.
“i’m not acting weird either-”
“yes you are.” yoongi cuts jungkook off right away.
“hyung, c’mon...”
“you can’t even look at me since that night.” yoongi says but doesn’t raise his voice, he’s not trying to fight.
“i can look at you just fine.” jungkook replies and yoongi just scoffs.
“okay, jungkook.” yoongi hums completely unbothered.
“you’re communicating like 12 year olds,” you say when you’ve had enough and they both look at you again. “if something happened that night to cause all of this you should at least talk about it instead of avoiding each other.”
“nothing happened that night.” jungkook mutters as he finishes his breakfast.
“it sure looks like something happened.” you cross your arms and lean against the door frame.
“jungkookie is too ashamed of what he did that night.” yoongi says and pours the finished coffee in his mug.
you feel a pang in your chest so you look at jungkook with a cocked eyebrow for an explanation.
he is ashamed of that night?
“no!” jungkook looks panicked. “i don’t- i... it’s not like that.” he keeps stuttering and you don’t know what to say. maybe you should’ve considered the chance of them regretting it.
“she doesn’t need any type of reassurance, jungkook,” yoongi speaks again. “we both know she’s not the one you’re having trouble with.”
“hyung.” jungkook says like he’s warning him about something you don’t really understand.
“jungkook.” yoongi replies with the same tone but he currently looks much more calm than jungkook.
“can any of you explain what is happening?” you say in confusion and jungkook just looks down at his almost empty bowl while yoongi turns around to face you with a hand gripping the counter behind him and grabbing his coffee mug with the other.
“jungkook’s never messed around with another boy and now he’s acting like he’s committed a crime.” yoongi explains and you turn to jungkook when you hear him sigh.
“i’m not gay.” he mutters, still not looking up from his cereal.
“i’m not gay either,” yoongi replies like jungkook has said the most stupid thing he’s ever heard. “do you know what being bi means?”
“i’m not bi either.” jungkook replies.
yoongi snorts. “okay.”
“hyung.”
“i just swallowed your cum, you’re acting like i fucked you in the ass.” yoongi snaps and you have to slap your hand over your mouth to hide the gasp that threatens to slip out.
“you touched me too.” jungkook mumbles.
“and now you’re gonna say that you hated it, right?” yoongi scoffs and jungkook gets quiet. “jungkook, you almost came in my hand.”
“shut the fuck up!” jungkook snaps, finally looking up at yoongi with what you think is supposed to be an angry expression but in your opinion he just looks cute. and you guess yoongi might think the same.
“or what?” yoongi replies with a cocked eyebrow. jungkook doesn’t respond, just grabs his now empty bowl and walks to the sink, leaving it there before walking out of the kitchen.
and thank god because you were gonna drown in the fucking sexual tension if they stayed together in the same room for 5 more seconds.
“sheesh...” you whisper and walk to the counter to grab an apple.
“i don’t even know why you tried to do anything.” yoongi mumbles against his coffee mug before giving it a sip.
“you know it’s not his fault to be a little confused, right?” you tell him and sit on the chair jungkook was just sitting at. “you were kind of an asshole right now.” you admit and he sighs, putting his blue mug down on the counter.
“i’m not mad because he’s confused, he has all of the right to go through that, all of us do.” yoongi clarifies and you hum before giving your apple a bite. “what bothers me is that he can’t even look at me since that night.” he says, his voice quieter this time.
“yeah... i know.” you nod because you’ve obviously noticed.
yoongi sighs. “did i ruin everything with him?” you hate how worried he looks. of course yoongi cares about him. after all, jungkook is his friend and you can’t imagine how tough it must be for him to feel like he’s losing his friend.
“you didn’t, yoongi.” you answer his question because you really mean it. “i just think he needs some time to think.”
“thinking is what made him start acting like this, he looked perfectly fine that night.” yoongi tells you. “what he has to do is talk about it, but he won’t because he’s stubborn as shit.”
“yoongi.”
“he’s my friend, i can insult him.” he says and you can’t help but chuckle. “but seriously, he should talk about all of what he’s been bottling up. he’s probably been thinking about that night for all of these past days.”
“he’s not the only one,” you blurt out without even thinking and you can feel your cheeks heat up as soon as you look at yoongi and see a smirk growing on his face. “leave me alone.” you tell him before he can tease you about it.
“i didn’t say anything,” you can hear the smirk in his voice. “but i’ve been thinking about it too so don’t look so embarrassed.” he mumbles like it’s nothing as he puts his mug in the sink.
“you have?” you ask quietly. you don’t really know why but you thought he would’ve already moved on from it, that’s why this is surprising.
“y/n, c’mon.” he chuckles like your question is the stupidest thing he’s ever heard, like the answer is obvious.
you’re about to reply, not really know what exactly, but jungkook is on the door again. he’s changed from his pajamas into some black sweatpants and a big hoodie, the hood over his head to probably cover his messy hair.
“where are you going?” you ask him. a stupid question really. at this point of quarantine people can only really leave for specific jobs or to do the groceries, and since the three of you work from home you can only suppose he’s going to do the groceries.
you turn out to be right when he walks into the kitchen and picks the little piece of paper with the list of groceries before putting it in the pocket of his hoodie. “the groceries,” he replies either way and looks at you. “do you need anything else?” he asks and you notice the way he completely ignores if yoongi wants anything too but decide not to say anything.
“not really,” you shake your had and he hums. “thanks, kook.”
jungkook nods in response and leaves the kitchen without saying another word, not even sparing yoongi a glance. just a couple of seconds later you can hear the front door opening and closing.
“he’s so...” yoongi sighs as you give your apple the last bite.
“so what?” you stand up to walk to the trash can and throw the apple. he doesn’t answer. “you wanna fuck him so bad.” you tease him.
“maybe.” he hums and you look at him, he’s just mindlessly scrolling down his phone.
you sigh and hop on the counter, swinging your legs as you think of ways to comfront him about that night. but your mouth ends up being faster than your brain.
“what did you mean?” you ask and see him putting his phone down to pay attention to you.
“what?” it just hits you now how intimidating his gaze is so you look down at your lap before speaking again.
“have you really been thinking about that night?” your voice is a little more quiet now.
“of course.” he replies like it’s the easiest question he’s ever gotten.
“okay, but like... in a good or bad way?”
when you don’t get an answer you look up at yoongi and find him pursing his lips in deep thought, like he’s calculating the words to say.
“so we’re finally talking about this.” he says.
“you don’t want to?”
“i thought you didn’t,” yoongi replies. “you didn’t address it the next morning and both you and jungkook kind of looked mortified so i didn’t pressure you into talking, i thought you wanted to forget about it.”
“i mean,” you start, trying to find the words to explain. “i kinda wanted to forget,” yoongi hums for you to keep talking. “because i felt so... weird? no, not weird. i felt-”
“uncomfortable?”
“no.”
“regretful?”
“no,” you shake your head again. “ugh, i don’t know how to explain it. i just couldn’t believe i did that, i felt a little... dirty.” you admit and god, it is so embarrassing.
“you are,” yoongi replies with a little smirk that makes you want to jump on him. jesus christ, you’re so fucked. “no, but seriously- i understand,” he says, smirk completely gone. “you could’ve talked to me though.”
“i didn’t know if you wanted to talk about it,” you explain with the annoying feeling that your cheeks are heating up again. “and since you didn’t talk about it either i thought you regretted it or something...” you mumble and yoongi’s jaw almost drops to the floor.
“what are you talking about?” he frowns, seemingly offended by what you said.
“you don’t regret it?” you ask shyly.
“the only thing i regret is not fucking you too.”
holy shit.
you could have a gun pressed to the back of your head right now and still wouldn’t admit the way your whole body feels like it’s been set on fire just from one stupid sentence.
“you- you can’t say stuff like that.” you mutter and have the decency to look at him even if you’re red as a tomato because you know he’s gonna know either way. because yoongi is a menace.
“why not?” he cocks an eyebrow. and fuck, he’s so hot you don’t understand how the hell you didn’t realize until now.
“because.” you reply because you don’t know what to say.
“no way you’re getting shy now...” yoongi chuckles as he walks to you.
“leave me alone.” you whine in protest and reach to him with your hand to softly slap his face. you do it in a playful way, your hand barely brushing against his cheek, but yoongi’s smirk completely disappears and something in your stomach twists in fear.
“do that again.” his voice is so fucking low all of the sudden, like he’s challenging you, and you don’t know if you’re scared or turned on.
“i- i’m sorry, did i hurt you?” of course the most stupid question you could’ve asked in a moment like this is the first thing that comes out of your mouth.
yoongi only shakes his head. “i said do that again,” he repeats and takes the final step towards you to stand right in front of you. “harder.”
you gulp. your whole body feels too hot, your clothes are starting to feel uncomfortable. yoongi is too close and you’re sure he’s devouring you with his eyes.
“yoongi.” you try to say something but you don’t know what you can really say.
you’ve never hit anyone. well, maybe one time a couple of years ago when a guy didn’t stop bothering you at a club when you just wanted to dance with your friends. you’ve never hit anyone this way.
does yoongi like this? is he really one of those people?
“i don’t wanna hurt you.” you mumble and feel stupid right after.
“i like it when it hurts,” yoongi replies and you have to bite your lip not to moan. “i’m asking you to do it, so just-”
the sound of the slap echoes in the quiet kitchen and you stare at yoongi with panic growing in your chest and a weird itch on the palm of your hand, the one you haven’t even put down yet from how shocked you are that you just slapped yoongi. his head is turned to the side from the slap and you can see the little reddened skin on his cheek before he turns back to you.
“i’m so sorr-”
you never get to properly apologize because the words die down your throat the second yoongi’s lips collide against yours. you immediately kiss him back and hum against his mouth when he wraps his arms around your body, moving closer to stand between your legs and pulling you as close as he can to his body. your arms are soon wrapping around his neck too and you completely lose yourself in the kiss.
he kisses you like he’s missed you. like he’s been wanting, needing to kiss you again for these past two weeks. and you’re no better, you kiss him back with the same hunger and desperation because you now realize just how bad you needed him.
“fuck,” he mumbles between kisses and you hum in response, not daring to pull away when it feels so good. “can’t stop thinking about you.”
“yoongi...” you whine while one of yoongi’s hands goes up and down your thigh softly, too softly compared to the way he’s kissing you.
“wanted you so fucking bad.” yoongi sighs and starts kissing down your jaw towards your neck.
“fuck,” a little breathy chuckle slips out of your mouth when you realize something. “this fucking counter again.”
yoongi chuckles against your neck and brings his other hand to your other thigh, making you wrap your legs around you before picking you up from the counter.
“what-” you mumble but yoongi gives you just a short kiss to shut you up for a moment as he starts walking out of the kitchen.
“do you wanna get caught again?” he teases and your cheeks burn. you hide your face on the crook of his neck in embarrassment. “i want you to myself today, if that’s okay.” yoongi says and fuck, why does everything he say makes you feel like you’re melting? you’re sure he wasn’t like this before the kitchen incident.
“yeah, that’s okay.” you leave a kiss on his neck that has him letting out a shaky breath as he keeps walking down the corridor.
“good.” he hums and you keep kissing his neck, sucking a little mark on a spot that’s clearly sensitive because as soon as you start sucking on it yoongi’s grip on your thighs tightens significantly.
you’re brought back to reality and forced to stop kissing on his neck when yoongi is suddenly placing you down on a bed, his bed. the covers are extremely soft, that’s the first thing you notice, and the mattress seems super comfortable. in that moment you can understand why yoongi stays in bed until late somedays, his bed is so fucking nice.
“there you go,” yoongi says as he hovers over you and positions himself on his knees between your legs, one of his elbows on the mattress right next to your head to support his body. “pretty.” he smiles before kissing you again.
“you should’ve...” you start between kisses, your hands going up to his long hair while his free hand goes down to your waist. “should’ve talked to me before.”
“could tell you the same.” he replies and stops kissing your lips to go a little lower, kissing your neck again.
“wait.” you squirm under him and try to push him away.
yoongi quickly pulls away, looking down at you with worried eyes. “everything okay?” he asks.
“yeah,” you nod. “just wanna be on top.” you try to push him again and he chuckles.
“okay,” yoongi hums and he suddenly grabs you by your thighs and turns the both of you around so that you’re on top. “good?” he asks, staying sat up with you on his lap.
“yeah.” you smile as you place your hands on his shoulders.
“are you trying to get all dominant on me now?” he teases while his hands find their way under your shirt.
you don’t know what gives you the courage for it but you smirk back. “and what if i was?”
yoongi snorts.
“what?” you frown, clearly offended by his response.
“nothing...” he says but you can see how he’s trying to hold back a smile.
“just so you know, i’m a good dom.”
and it’s not a lie. you’ve been dominant in bed quite many times before, it’s not like it’s your preference but you definitely have. you’re confident even if something inside of you tells you there’s no way you’re gonna be able to dom him, your pride is bigger than that right now because his stupid smirk is making you want to shut him up.
“mh... i’m sure you are.” yoongi speaks with that stupid smirk.
“yoongi.” you whine in protest and feel stupid right after because his smirk only grows bigger.
“you’re such a cute little dom.” he brings his hand to your face and drags his thumb across your lower lip, making you realize you’re pouting.
“you’re pissing me off,” you shake him up a little with your hands on his shoulders. “i can dom you.”
“i had you blabbering like a little bitch the other day and i hadn’t even touched you yet.” yoongi says and gives your waist a light squeeze that makes you flinch.
“it was jungkook,” you say, just because he’s actually getting to you and you need a distraction. “he was the one fucking me.” you clarify and he cocks an eyebrow.
“you think jungkook was the dominant one that night?” he asks. “he completely shut down when i got there.”
you gulp when you remember how jungkook’s dominant demeanor completely disappeared as soon as yoongi walked in the kitchen that night, how he clearly obeyed to everything yoongi told him. and it is so fucking hot. by this point your panties must be ruined, you can’t help but squirm uncomfortably on top of him.
yoongi seems to notice your problem because he looks down at where your bodies are together and moves his hands down to your hips, pulling you closer to him so that you’re sat exactly on top of his crotch. a sigh escapes your mouth before you can stop it when you feel how hard he is under you.
“i bet i can make you cry before you can even begin to try dominating me.” he hums and nuzzles into your neck, making you squirm just with the feeling of his nose on your skin.
“you just caught me in a bad time that night,” you mumble. and you’re kinda right, you were so desperate that night, you’re sure you could’ve done a lot better if your desperation hadn’t been clouding your mind. “don’t be so confident.”
“i went so fucking easy on you both that night,” yoongi says against your skin like it’s a warning. “actually, i didn’t do anything and you two were doing everything i said like you were under a spell.”
“i...” your mind goes blank when he runs his tongue down your neck.
“you should’ve seen your face,” yoongi continues, leaving little kisses down the wet stripe on your neck. “you were fucked out, you looked dumb.” he chuckles a little and you should feel offended but you only moan in response when he bites on your neck, not enough to hurt but enough to get a reaction from you.
“yoongi-”
“it’s okay baby,” he hums, his breath hitting the sensitive skin of your neck and making goosebumps erupt all over your body. “i would love nothing more than to fuck you dumb.”
“that’s-” you surpress the moan that’s threatening to come out of your mouth when yoongi places his hands on your hips and pulls you closer to him just to grind against his clothed crotch. “that’s not the way you talk about a lady.” you manage to say even though your voice breaks halfway through. yoongi has obviously noticed because a dark chuckle hits your neck again.
“oh, i know,” he says. you can definitely feel how your panties are sticking to your pussy now. “but you’re not a lady, you’re just a slut.”
a loud moan slips out of your mouth when he makes you grind your hips again and the friction between you feels just right. “yoongi...” you hold on tight to his shoulders as his lips make their way up to whisper in your ear.
“right?”
“yoongi, i-” by this time your hips are moving on their own, chasing that delicious friction agaist his crotch.
“aren’t you my pretty slut?” the gentle bite to your earlobe does it for you.
you don’t remember the last time you needed someone this bad. well, maybe jungkook a couple of weeks ago, but somehow this feels different. your body is screaming for him, something inside you has been begging you to let go of that pride and just give into him since you kissed.
“please.” you say and feel stupid right after because you’ve already given up and because you don’t know what you’re asking for.
“oh, how i love to hear you say that word.” yoongi smiles wide at you and you can’t help but continue grinding your hips against him.
“fuck, yoongi i-”
“mh, i know.” he gives you a sympathetic nod and looks down at how you’re working your hips. “look at you,” he says and gently slaps your hip. “already begging for it like the slut you are.”
you try to speak but the only sound coming out of your mouth is another pathetic whimper as you keep chasing that friction.
“should i just let you do this until you cum?” yoongi asks, you instantly shake your head.
“no,” you slide your hands down his arms until you’re wrapping them around his wrists. “touch me.”
“i’m touching you.” he fakes a confused expression as he squeezes your hips just a little. you just know he’s having so much fun with this.
“yoongi, you know what i mean,” you grind against him one last time before he lets out a chuckle. “what?” and you almost can’t even recognize your voice anymore from how desperate and whiny you sound, but you know he likes it.
“i find it funny how you were trying to go all dominant and shit just a minute ago and now you’re begging like a slut.”
you don’t say anything in response, you only bite your lip to hold back a sound because you’ve never really enjoyed being talked to like this in bed but now you might be discovering something new about yourself because yoongi makes it so hot.
he smirks at your lack of response and turns the both of you again, making you lay down on your back with him between your legs. and you enjoyed being on top of him for a moment but you can’t lie and say you don’t like this position as well.
“i would love to take my time with you, but i wanna see that pretty pussy again,” yoongi says, completely unaware of how you blush at his words because he’s focused on pulling your sweatpants down your thighs. “maybe i’ll make it longer next time, but i’ve been waiting for two weeks.”
next time. the knowledge that he’s already thinking about a next time makes you a little giddy but you don’t make a comment about it.
you kick your sweatpants off when yoongi pulls them past your ankles and let then fall on the floor.
yoongi makes a disapproving soud when you bend your legs and close them, hiding from him. “c’mon, be good and open those pretty legs for me.” he puts a hand on one of your ankles, trying to make you stretch your legs.
you give in so easily, spreading your legs enough for him to get between them again. his hands go to your thighs, rubbing up and down slowly and leaving goosebumps behind.
but he’s not looking at you yet. well, he is looking at you, he’s looking at you with a pretty smirk but he’s not looking where you want him to look. that alone makes you buck your hips up in an attempt to make him look down. the gesture makes yoongi break in a chuckle but he still doesn’t give you what you want, leaning down and supporting his weight on his elbow next to your head. then he gives you a kiss that leaves you speechless instead.
“what?” you mumble in confusion.
“you’re so cute when you’re horny.” yoongi gives you a smile that successfully distracts you from his hand going up your thigh.
you open your mouth to reply but the only thing that comes out is a loud moan when you suddenly feel yoongi’s hand cupping your pussy over your panties.
“have you been this wet all this time?” yoongi says and your brain can’t even come up with an answer because his fingers start running up and down your clothed folds.
you’re so wet that the feeling of the soaked fabric of your panties against your pussy makes you blush in embarrassment, but it feels so good to finally be touched that you can’t help the sounds coming out of your mouth.
“what a dirty girl,” yoongi hums as your hips buck a little to meet the movements of his hand. “so wet just because of some kissing and some grinding?” he teases you with a chuckle.
“please, take my panties off.” you beg. you need his fingers on you.
“only because you said please.”
he partially listens to you because he doesn’t really take them off but instead pushes them to the side, which you find ten times hotter.
a loud moan slips out of your mouth when his fingers finally touch you with nothing in between. your hand twitches with the urge to cover your mouth but you know yoongi won’t like that so you settle with gripping at the sheets of his bed instead.
“haven’t stopped thinking about this pussy,” yoongi mumbles and gives it a little slap that makes you squeak in surprise. “cute.” he grins and kisses you once again.
you kiss him back, wrapping your arms around him to make sure he doesn’t pull away. he swallows all of your moans when he easily slips one of his fingers inside you and starts fucking you with it before quickly adding another one, you’re so wet that his fingers slide in so well.
“mhh… that’s a good pussy.” yoongi hums between kisses and you clench around his fingers.
his fingers feel so good, you can’t wait for his cock.
you moan his name, making him smile against your mouth. “does that feel good?”
“yeah.” you whine and he curls his fingers inside you, easily finding that spot. “fuck, right there…”
it feels so good that you almost forgot you don’t live alone. almost. you remember because you’re suddenly being surprised by the sound of the apartment door opening and closing.
jungkook is back home.
“yoongi,” you mumble against his lips like a warning but he only hums and starts fingering you faster. “fuck... yoon- yoongi, stop.”
“do you really want me to stop?” yoongi breaks away from the kiss with the hottest smirk on his face.
you don’t know what to answer. well, you know you don’t want him to stop, but jungkook is home now and you are loud enough for him to hear.
“yoon...” you try but nothing else comes out when he slips a third finger.
“that’s right,” he smiles and leaves a sweet kiss on your jaw as he keeps finger fucking you at a pace that’s driving you crazy. “say my name.”
you do. you say his name and he slips his fingers out just to give your pussy another spank that makes your whole body twitch under him.
“louder.” yoongi says as he rubs his fingers over your folds to ease the pain from the spank.
you say his name louder, but just a little because you know jungkook must be placing the groceries in the kitchen right now, he could hear you if you said it louder.
but jungkook hearing you must be exactly what yoongi wants because he gives you another spank that has you moaning his name way too loud. yoongi smiles at the sound.
“that’s a good slut.” he praises, his breath hitting your ear, and starts rubbing your pussy with his fingers from side to side so fast that you don’t know what to do with your body, your hips twitching and your cheeks reddening at the wet sound of his hand against your pussy.
god, you’re so wet.
“please…” you beg through a sound that’s close to a sob and it makes yoongi stop the movements of his hand and straighten up a little to look down at you, sitting back on his feet under him.
 “please what?” he finally gives your pussy a break but you miss his hand, the one he’s bringing to his mouth right now. “messy fucking girl, i always have to clean you up, right?”
you hold your breath and your pussy throbs when he slips two of his wet fingers in his mouth and hums like it is the most delicious thing he’s ever tasted.
“yoongi please.” you repeat even if you don’t know what you’re asking.
“is that the only word you know how to say now?” yoongi asks, not really paying attention to you but rather to cleaning your juices off his fingers. “i won’t know what you want if you don’t tell me.”
your desperation gives you the courage to sit up, your legs a little bent up on each side of yoongi, and grab at the hem of his shirt, tugging it up until it’s coming off. you throw it on the floor and take the chance to run your hands down his chest, feeling the hot skin under your fingers and getting so lost in it that the words come out of your mouth easily.
“i want your cock.” you blurt out, looking up at him with your best puppy eyes.
“you want it?” yoongi says with that condescending tone again, like he’s talking to a dumb person.
fuck, you want him so bad.
you just nod in reply. he hums and then gets up on his knees, getting so close to you with how you’re sitting. “then pull it out.”
you hold your breath for a second. “can i?”
“of course you can.”
you don’t think about it twice. you hook your fingers under the waistband of his sweatpants again and tug them down, biting your lip at the sight of the outline of his hard cock under the fabric of his boxers.
he’s so big. and you want him so bad.
“c’mon,” yoongi urges you to do something and you finally tug down at his boxers. “there you go.”
you notice two things when you’ve pulled his boxers down to his thighs.
first one, he’s definitely big.
second one, yoongi has a piercing on his dick. right on the underside, under his tip, a barbell on his frenulum.
you have to bite back a moan at how hot you find it and yoongi seems to notice your reaction because he chuckles. “you’ve never seen one?” he says with a teasing tone and you look up at his face.
“can i…” you shift uncomfortably under him because you need your panties off.
“can you what?” you hold your breath when he brings a hand down to his cock, stroking it slowly. he is so close to you in the position you are right now.
“can i suck you off?” you blurt out before you can even worry about looking desperate.
you don’t miss the way he squeezes on the base of his cock as soon as you let the words out, but he shakes his head.
you’re about to complain when yoongi speaks up again. “i would love to fuck that pretty mouth, but i need to fuck that pussy first.” he nods down at your body.
you lean back, supporting yourself against your elbows, and look at him with puppy eyes now that you know they seem to work on him. “then come fuck it.” you know you’re pouting but you couldn’t care less right now. you need him so bad.
“it will be my pleasure,” he grins but then looks down at your chest. “but take that shirt of first.”
you obey instantly and take it off in a second, throwing it somewhere on the bedroom floor and finally laying down on your back. you don’t miss yoongi’s gaze on your bare chest.
“stop doing that.” you throw one arm over your eyes not to see the way he’s devouring you with his eyes.
“i’m not doing anything.”
“you’re looking.”
“am i supposed to look somewhere else?” he responds and you chuckle a little.
“no, but- ah!” a moan escapes your mouth when you feel yoongi’s mouth on one of your nipples. you unconsciously slap your hand over your mouth to muffle any other noise slipping out of it, but yoongi is quickly grabbing your wrist and pushing your arm away.
“none of that shit,” he says before starting to litter kisses all over your chest. your back arches a little when he flicks his tongue on your other nipple and he chuckles in response. “so cute.”
“just fuck me already.” you beg, feeling yourself getting even more wet each second.
“someone’s eager to get fucked, huh?” yoongi straightens up again and wraps his hand around his cock again, stroking it lazily like before. you can’t look away.
then all of the brattiness you have in you slips out your mouth. “no, i just think you’re making me wait longer because you don’t know what to do with that.” you nod towards his cock.
yoongi’s smile is gone when you look back at his face and you know you’re in trouble.
“i wanted to look at your face while i fucked you,” he starts and you can already sense a but coming. “but i want you on all fours now.” you open your mouth to say something but he shakes his head and speaks again. “turn around before you piss me off again.” he talks with such a low voice that you can’t deny him anything.
you turn around and get up on your hands and knees, though your breath hitches when he places a hand on your back and pushes down for you to get down on your elbows, you squish your cheek on his pillow.
yoongi curses behind you and you can sense he’s looking down at your exposed pussy. the reaction gives you the courage to arch your back, pressing your chest to the mattress and spreading your legs a little, just enough for him to see you better.
“if you tell me i can’t fuck you raw i’m gonna be mad.” he curses and you giggle.
“you can do it.”
“really?” yoongi asks. you appreciate that he’s making sure.
“yes, i let jungkook fuck me raw, you should do it too.” you respond and move your ass a little. “c’mon, i’m waiting.”
and you really thought he was gonna make you wait a little more, that’s why you gasp in surprise when yoongi rubs the tip of his cock through your folds.
“oh my god…” you mumble. “please, don’t tease.” you beg when he keeps rubbing it up and down. you can actually feel the piercing and you might go crazy.
“i don’t know, since you said i don’t know what to do with my cock maybe i shouldn’t give it to you.” yoongi says with a low chuckle as he places one of his hands on your hip.
“no, please.” you whine into the pillow, feeling like you could actually cry if he doesn’t slip it in right now.
“look at you, you haven’t stopped saying please since i first touched you.” he presses his tip to your clit and rubs it just right before pulling away and making you whine again.
“i swear to god if you don’t-” a loud moan escapes your mouth when you feel him slip in slowly. “oh fuck…” you mumble and bury your face on the pillow. but yoongi doesn’t seem to like that.
he’s suddenly threading his fingers through your hair so gently but then he tugs hard to lift your head from the pillow as he bottoms out. “wanna hear you.” he says.
“so good.” you manage to say as you support your upper body on your elbows so that the hair pulling doesn’t hurt a lot, just the necessary.
“yeah?” yoongi hums as he starts to pull out just as slowly as he slipped in.
“big…” you sigh and hear a hint of another chuckle before he slips in again.
“you’re so fucking tight, holy shit,” he groans and you can feel his hand on your hair faltering for a second so you clench around him to get a reaction. “oh fuck.” he moans and he sounds so hot that you push your ass back against him to make him bottom out again.
“you feel so good.” you whine and he finally lets go of your hair but you rest your head on your side for him to hear you.
“can i move?” yoongi asks, both hands on your hips now.
“yes please.” you beg.
and he’s not gentle, he fucks you hard right from the start. you can actually feel the cold piercing inside of you and you think you might go crazy. the sound of skin against skin the only thing echoing inside the room because it feels so good that no sound comes out of your mouth.
yoongi doesn’t like that. he gives your ass a hard spank as he bottoms out again and stays there.
“if i don’t hear you i’ll stop,” he warns you and you try to move your hips for him to start moving again, but his hard grip on them doesn’t let you. “did you understand?”
“yes.” you whine and another moan slips out of your mouth when he spanks you again.
“good slut.”
you think you’re gonna cry when he starts fucking you again. this time you allow yourself to let all the sounds out, not caring about how loud you are.
“yoongi...” your voice breaks when he starts hitting that sweet spot that makes your legs shake. your knees hurt but it feels so good you don’t want to change positions.
you’re so fucked out already, you wouldn’t be so gone at this point with anyone else, but somehow it feels different with yoongi.
“that feels good?” yoongi hums and you feel a little bit of pride at how broken his voice sounds too.
“yes!” you moan. “please, don’t stop… please.”
“fuck,” he truly seems to like to hear you beg. “it’s like this pussy was made for me.” and he won’t stop hitting that spot, you’re so fucking close.
“yours.” you mumble, completely fucked out, and clench when you hear him chuckle at the word.
“mine?” he teases, slowing down his thrusts.
you nod uncomfortably against the pillow and cry out when yoongi suddenly pulls out. “no, please…” you beg, desperately pushing your ass back for him to keep fucking you.
“no, turn around.” yoongi says and you have half a mind to obey, turning around on the bed and finally laying on your back with a relief sigh.
you’re quick to wrap your legs around him to push him closer. “please, yoongi, fuck me.” all shame is gone, you need him so bad.
“slut wants my cock?”
you nod.
“then say it.”
“i want your cock.” you bite your lip when he starts rubbing his tip through your folds again.
“who wants my cock?” yoongi asks, acting dumb. you want to cry.
“me.” you sigh, bucking your hips up to grind against his cock.
“who?” yoongi asks again and you get it now.
“your slut.” you answer. yoongi smirks proudly.
“who’s cock do you want?”
god. you will go insane at this point.
“yours.”
“mh, but that’s not enough for you, right?” he hums, looking down at where his cock is rubbing against you. your breath hitches when your dizzy mind is able to get what he means.
“i-”
“one cock is not enough for your, right?”
“yoongi…”
“you got fucked by one of your roommates two weeks ago and now you’re letting your other roommate fuck you too?” yoongi circles the tip of his cock on your clit, the piercing making it feel so good youe eyes roll back. “do you spread your legs for anyone who has a cock?”
“n- no…” you blush, the humilliating words making you feel so good somehow.
“no? just for us?” yoongi asks and leans down a little, the hand he was using to hold the base of his cock wrapping around your neck now.
“yes,” you sigh. everything feels so hot. “just for you.”
“yeah?” he hums. fuck, he’s so hot.
you try to nod but his hand around your neck squeezes a little. “fuck…” you moan, your pussy throbbing now.
“i knew you would like this, dirty girl,” yoongi chuckles and gives your neck another light squeeze as he starts slipping his cock into you again. “that’s a good slut.” he groans as you clench around him again.
yoongi keeps his hand around your neck as he starts fucking you, squeezing just lightly. and he knows what he’s doing, because the second he lets go you let out the loudest moan you’ve ever made. your hand flies to your mouth in embarrassment but yoongi grabs your wrist and pulls it over your head, pinning it right there.
“i wanna fucking hear you.” he says, hips hitting against the back of your thighs so hard as he fucks you at a brutal pace.
“jung- jungkook is home…” you mutter as a warning but he only laughs.
“is that an inconvenient now?” he gives you a deep thrust that makes your eyes roll back. “let him hear. should i ask him to come here too?”
“fuck.” you’re so close, if he keeps talking like that you’re gonna cum.
“i’m sure he’s listening from his room right now,” yoongi says, his thrusts hitting just right, you’re sure you’re creaming his cock by this point. “do you think he’s touching himself as he listens to you?”
“oh my god…” your hand twitches with the urge to cover your mouth again but he keeps it pinned to the mattress over your head, your other hand grips at the sheets tightly.
“i’m sure he wishes he was in my place right now.” he looks down at how your boobs bounce from the thrusts and you’re sure your cheeks are tomato red.
“so close...” you moan, your legs trembling around him.
“i start talking about jungkook and now you’re gonna cum?” yoongi teases, earning another whine from you. “wow, one cock is really not enough for you, isn’t it…”
“yoongi!” you squeak when you feel his free hand on your pussy, he starts rubbing circles on your clit.
“gonna cum around my cock?”
“yes! yes, please!” you’re so fucking loud now but you couldn’t care less.
“you want him to hear you, huh?” yoongi chuckles.
“i’m g- gonna cum…” you mumble, the words almost not coming out.
“say his name,” yoongi says and you open your eyes in shock, pussy clenching around him. “say his name or you’re not coming.” he warns as he slows down his thrusts.
“yoongi, no…” you cry out.
“that’s not his name.” yoongi gives your clit a little lap that makes your body twitch.
“ju… jungkook.” you try and blush right after. it feels so wrong to moan someone else’s name in bed, you know yoongi wants it but it makes you feel so dirty. he wants you to feel like that.
“louder, baby.” he says and the contrast between that petname and the names he was calling you before makes you feel like you’re gonna pass out.
“jungkook!” you finally say, making yoongi grin down at you.
“that’s it, say it again.” he says and resumes the pace he was fucking you with before.
“jungkook!” you moan louder and yoongi’s fingers on your clit is faster. “fuck! oh my- ah! gonna cum!”
“good slut,” yoongi hums. “c’mon, cum for us.”
us.
the stupid word and its implications make you clench impossibly tight around him as the craziest shock waves run through your whole body. your vision goes blurry so you close your eyes while your body goes limp, completely exhausted as you feel yoongi slipping out.
you’re about to complain when you open your eyes and see him stroking his cock and moaning as white stripes of cum land on your sweaty chest.
“oh my god…” you sigh and throw one of your arms over your eyes.
you hum when you feel yoongi’s hand on your cheek. “are you okay?” he speaks so softly you could’ve sworn he’s not the guy who just fucked you.
“yeah.” you reply and something makes you start giggling lazily.
“what are you laughing about now?” yoongi says but yo can hear a smile in his voice.
“i can’t believe that happened.” you mumble and put your arm down to look at him.
“well, it happened.” he leans down and gives your lips a sweet kiss, then he gets down from the bed.
you watch him put his sweatpants and grab a towel from one of the drawers on his closet as your chest keeps going up and down, trying to get your breathing back to normal.
“seriously, are you okay?” he asks when he comes back to bed and sits down next to you, cleaning his cum from your stomach.
“yeah, just… a little sore,” you chuckle, your cheeks burning from how gentle he’s suddenly being with you. “i don’t know if i’m gonna be able to get up.”
“you can stay here for as long as you want.” he says softly and folds the towel, throwing it on a basket where you suppose he puts his dirty clothes.
“i would stay here all day,” you admit. “but i have work and i have to eat first.”
“i can prepare a bath for you,” yoongi says and your heart does something weird in your chest. “for your sore muscles.” he rubs a hand up and down your bare thigh.
“can you do that?” you look at him with big eyes.
“of course i can.”
“how can you be so sweet after everything you just did to me?” you ask and he chuckles, leaning down to kiss you again.
“aftercare is important, i take that really seriously.”
“okay,” you smile sweetly at him. “then go prepare that bath.”
he snorts. “brat.” but he stands up again and walks out of the room, closing the door after.
you stay there for a minute, staring at the ceiling and thinking about everything you just did in this bed. and you feel kinda good and giddy about it until you remember about jungkook.
you moaned his name. you yelled his name. and he for sure heard you. you shake the thoughts away from your head and decide to get up from bed. you need that bath.
your body begs you to lay down when you manage to stand up, your legs are sore and your whole body is so weak that you almost fall down when you grab yoongi’s shirt from the floor. you hum pleasantly when you put the shirt on and notice it covers you perfectly, yoongi always wears big clothes.
your trembling legs guide you out of the room and the smell of food cooking in the kitchen hits your nose and almost makes you moan at how hungry you are, jungkook must be cooking lunch right now. since he must be in the kitchen you take the chance to run to the bathroom, where yoongi is preparing your bath. but you’re proved wrong when you collapse against a hard chest in the middle of the corridor.
jungkook is looking down at you with something you can’t really read in his eyes. he just walked out of his room, he had probably left the food cooking in the kitchen.
“hi!” you say like nothing ever happened because you’re still so embarrassed, your cheeks burning again.
“hey.” jungkook mumbles and separates from you, motioning to walk past you and back to the kitchen.
you are walking past him and to the bathroom when he says your name, making you turn to him. “yes?”
“next time just come to my room instead of thinking about me when you’re with him.”
you freeze. you literally don’t know what to say.
you open your mouth to try and say something, probably something stupid, when yoongi appears right behind you.
“i think you should just join us next time.” he says and the smug expression on jungkook’s face completely disappears. he turns around and walks inside the kitchen again.
your shoulders drop in disappointment because the reaction kind of felt like a rejection but yoongi places his hand on your shoulder.
“he will come around,” he tells you. “he’s just stubborn.”
“yeah…” you mumble and turn around to follow him into the bathroom.
“you really want him, huh?” yoongi teases you but you completely ignore him, standing in front of the mirror and cringing at how messy you look. “my shirt looks good on you.” he adds, standing behind you.
a little smirk grows on your face as you look at him in the mirror. “you fuck me once and you’re already in love with me?” you tease.
“wow, look at how bratty that mouth is,” yoongi mumbles, crossing his arms against his chest. “but then you barely speak a word when you’re getting fucked.” that shuts your mouth completely and he looks proud of it.
“shut up…” you mumble and turn around to push him out of the bathroom. “get out, i wanna enjoy my bath.”
yoongi just chuckles to himself before turning around and leaving. you only notice the dumb smile on your face when you look at yourself in the mirror again.
yoongi has you smiling like that. and you also remember jungkook, how he basically told you to have sex with him again and the invitation actually sparked something inside of you.
you were just roommates a month ago but now you’re starting a dangerous game with the both of them. the thing is that it feels good, you can only hope it turns out alright.
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A/N: askssjdnandkdjas i hope you liked this chapter, please let me know your thoughts !!! it helps a lot to have feedback <3 i'm obviously makind this a series so pls look forward for the next chapter :) 💖 thank you all for reading ! have a nice day babes
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TAGLIST: @m4gg13-g @kooksbunnnn @baechugff @danielle143 @signingsongbird @dontcallmeelle @fancy-cloud @melakrish
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lunaria-maharlika · 8 months ago
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Pt 2. EXTRA Danny accidentally becomes the president
P2 extra: Danny becomes the president
Danny slept for ONLY a few days and when he woke up he was healed of all injury. Oh, and also, he wasn't in his room. NO, he was in a mansion, a FRUITLOOP type of mansion. A beautiful gothic inspired mansion that screamed "I AM ELEGANCE, I AM BEAUTY I AM MONEY" it was only when he one of the workers in the mansion came in did he get informed about what happened these last few days.
APPARENTLY this wasn't just a mansion, it was a WHITE HOUSE. Except it was panted like a black and green galaxy because everyone hates white now
And also he's the president.
A Fenton is either EXTREMELY SUCCESSFUL or EXTREMELY UNSUCCESSFUL.
All he wanted to keep to protect his town from the GIW. But considering that fainted he was... unsuccessful? But that slight failure did help the amity parkers decide to help themselves and finally accept him as hero so maybe not??
He was happy that they accepted him and protected him but he really wasn't expecting this at all. Why in the world did they make him president??? He didn't think they liked him that much! Also! How is he president??? Amity park is just a random town in the middle of nowhere Illinois!
Wait...what??! WHAT DO YOU MEAN AMITY IS AN INDEPENDENT COUNTRY???!! I WAS OUT FOR 3 DAYS! THEY HAVENT EVEN STARTED CLEANING UP YET HOW IN THE NAME OF THEY ANCIENTS DID WE GET DECLARED AS AN INDEPENDENT COUNTRY????!
"I see..." Danny nodded after finally calming down. "So let me get this straight..." He counted on his fingers, "You," he looks at the woman in front of him "along side other people and ghosts, and mom and dad, and fright night, and Pandora...kidnapped the us president"
She nodded.
"Took him to UN headquarters, then Bribed, blackmailed, and harrased the UN members into declaring us a country"
.she nodded.
"Then declared me as king and president of amity"
She nodded.
"You know this new development is gonna attract the league of bitches right?"
"Oh we won't have to worry about that for now, but when they do then we'll be prepared." She smiled innocently.
Danny stared at her with tired eyes as he channeled his inner amity parker, the power to say well, I guess this is happening now. He sighed "Fine, but I can't be king and president at the same time. I can be king since you're all liminal, so technically all of amity is part of the whole ghost king territory." He sighed, "but I can't be president, too much responsibility, I'm already in charge of a whole ass realm"
So now they needed a new president, preferably some uncorrupt, someone who doesn't care much about the money and will always look for ways to improve the living standard, someone kind but not a push over.
Next day it was declared that.
MADDIE AND JACK FENTON, PRESIDENTS OF AMITY.
Danny was stunned when he saw the news. Did they seriously pick the resident mad scientists as president.
Don't get him wrong, he loves his parents and know that they're awesome but can they do this???
Turns out they can.
The president Drs Fenton's first move was healthcare for Both ghosts and humans and a free class dedicated to helping yourself.
Helping yourself classes include:
How to stitch your self up
How to use fudge as a weapon
How to fight the world most dangerous villains.
How to fight the worlds strongest heroes
Etch.
They launched some programs that might seem weird at first.
Programs like:
A defence class against sentient food.
Making friends with the realms
A school for the liminal
A class for avoiding the fae.
Using the blob ghosts as construction workers.
Etch
They might be weird but the end results turned out to be pretty usefull for the amity parkers.
At some point they decided to build a wall around the countrys property. It would ensure that only the amity parkers and people with permission would be able to enter/leave the town. There would be no gate and the only way out would be trough the portal system built by the Fenton's.
Danny thought it was too much
The amity parkers thought it was perfect, they didn't want anyone in their country, this was the kings haunt, this was their home and they would die and then come back as ghosts just to protect it.
And so the wall was raised..
Amity park continued to live in harmony and peace for many years...
-----
A couple of years later.
Flash had come across the wall.
And of course, alerted the league of bitches.
Batman was having a headache, no matter where he looked, no matter how many government systems he hacked, there was nothing. Not a single piece of info, not a single paper trail on what could possibly be whats behind the wall, and when it was built.
But it's impossible for something that big to just appear out of nowhere.
So the JL had suggested looking over Illinois via satellite, the wall didn't have a roof so they should be able to see the inside.
"What the heck" Oracle cursed as she looked at the camera. "Hey RR, look at this"
"what is it?" Red Robin walked closer, coffee mug in hand.
"Somethings interfering, I can't get a view of the wall at all" she took a sip of her own coffee as she tried hacking. Emphasis on TRIED.
The batcomputer was covered in static, then turned black. After that it flashed gold with a Egyptian like gold simbol and a message.
"NU UH"
" Get wrecked ".
Suddenly whoever was On the other side started hacking the batcomputer.
It turned into a nearly 24 hour, (Oracle: does this hacker not sleep??) battle of trying to keep the hacker away from their bat systems.
It only stopped when the hacker sent a message.
"Nice as this little war was, im getting bored so bye (⁠ ⁠╹⁠▽⁠╹⁠ ⁠)"
Seizing the opportunity they tried to hack in. Only to be hit with a firewall and a virus.
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Life was good, life was stressful but it was good for Danny.
He thought to himself as he walked towards the wall that kept them safe.
Appearantly the clan of glorified furrys tried hacking them last night. Unfortunately for them not only was Tucker incredibly good at hacking, his liminality also gave him less need for sleep so he just kept messing with them until they were exhausted.
But this little occurrence made Danny think a bit. Now that the GIW was gone and the Anti ecto acts were basically burned without a trace , there was no need to hide. There was never a need to isolate their little country in the first place.
The amity parkers are free come and go whenever they want, the wall isn't here to keep them in, it's to keep the outsiders out. The rich familys often go out, they can't just disappear from society after all, but the other amity parkers, they don't. They haven't left at all, claiming that it was better for them here as they probably won't be accepted. Just because the Anti ecto laws are gone doesn't change the fact that liminals and ghost aren't recognized as species, they were closer to myths than metas and the world, (especially the league of bitches) werent like them, they were terrified of change. So they stayed in amity.
The people just wanted to feel safe for a while, lay low until they're sure that no one would hurt them any more. But they're stronger now, better than before and more ...magical.
Danny stops waking and looks back at the town. Liminals, ghost, blobs, and humans with ghostly features from the ecto walked, talked and played together. He grinned so what if the world would have a hard time accepting them? The worlds opinion doesn't matter, destroying it or fleeing to another dimension was always a choice and his people aren't the type to back down from a fight.
Yeah, It was time to reintroduce Amity to the world. He flipped the switch and the walls portal gate opened to Gotham.
Now then? They had a plan, his people suggested he take the lead in the plan and they will follow.
The plan? The plan was to become a head ache for Bruce Wayne, aka the The Furry knight.
Rich fruitloop with a plan to takeover the business world style.
_________
Tim is stressed not only is he stressed with the whole random Illinois wall situation he's also stressing out about this random Business man that appeared out of nowhere And is competing against WE!
Okay, maybe not competing but still!! It's only been two months, TWO MONTHS since this company appeared and it was already competing for one of the richest companys in America! How?????
So he tried looking into the owner. The owner looked like about his age! Looked like a fresh 18 year old but his file says he's 25, something about slow aging that runs in the family, maybe a meta gene? But theres no way he could build a billionaire company from scratch at only 25 so hes definitely born in a rich family. Daniel Fenton, his name, a perfectly normal name. Only issue is that, THERE ARE NO BILLIONAIRE FAMILIES NAMED FENTON!.
He looked deeper, he found an interview that said he was from a country called Amity when asked where it was, he gave coordinates. Not an address, not a continent, but COORDINATES. And Guess where the coordinates led?
THE FREAKING WALL OF ILLINOIS!!!!.
This man came from the wall! Well... Most likely INSIDE the wall. But from the wall nonetheless.
So he told Bruce, and what was the best way to get a business mans attention without being suspicious?
A GALA
Tags, I'm not gonna do tags anymore, might make a masterpost so look out for that instead.
@vixen-uchiha
@sebas-nights
@whotfevenknowsanymore
@jaguarthecat
@serasvictoria02
@devilbunny612
@sumatra513
@just-lurking-dont-mind-meh
@i-love-mangoes
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sashayed · 2 months ago
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I haven't said as much about electoral politics this year as I have in previous cycles, because I am exhausted like everyone else and have nothing new or helpful to add. That is still true, so caveat lector I guess lmao!!! Happy American Election Day Fellow Sufferers!!
I have been experiencing an internal backlash the last few years to my extremely Sorkinpilled D.C. private school upbringing -- my childhood spent as a kind of convent schoolgirl in the faith of The System Is Good If We All Participate, which of course has a uhhh let's say generously a minimal engagement with the ways in which many of us are by design shut out of participating. I don't think idealism is necessarily childish, but I think MY idealism certainly has childish qualities, an undergirding of 90s feel-goodism, of civic participation as a subtle ego stroke and of voting -- although I would never have consciously put it this way -- as a way to feel superior to people who don't vote.
Lately there has bubbled up in me a sludgy, adolescent fury at this whole stupid country that has made it very very hard to feel like I should do even the bare minimum. For these people? AMERICANS? The ones that not only want Donald Trump to be president but saw what happened the first time and were like, We love this, do it again but worse? Whatever, fuckos. "I hope you people get your dearest wish and it chews you to death slowly," I may have thought.
I have also thought: why is it so controversial to ask elected officials to stop funding a genocide? Why are we treating people who make that ask, who are watching the current administration directly fund death on a mass scale and objecting to that choice, as if they are being babies and just need to get over it? How are they supposed to get over it? Why is anybody over it?
Anyway all this means that I, a known chipper door-knocker and caller of congresspeople, have been pretty low-key this current cycle. I think that is OK. I don't want to make this a big dramatic confessional about how I didn't write enough postcards or whatever. We all get exhausted and this was my turn.
But it has also been an illuminating cycle in that it's made it clear to me how much at my big age I still want politics to make me feel good, and when they don't, I still have the urge to throw a lil tantrum about it! I can get very superior and intellectual about how right-wing operatives manipulate their voters emotionally WITHOUT EVEN NOTICING that I too have been manipulated, in my case into the feeling that nonparticipation is a kind of revolutionary act.* Just absolute "I threw it on the GROUND" logic happening inside my head. "Maybe if I don't vote I will be doing Quiet Quitting, which is uhhhhh anticapitalist." I'm not a part of your system!!!
Anyway, I am trying to have self-compassion about it, and one way for me to do that is to project my internal experience onto a theoretical reader. That would be you, my imaginary friend who clicked on this post for some reason even though you have already decided not to vote! I just want to tell you that I am more sympathetic to your point of view than I have ever been in my whole life, and I'm sorry I have historically been a glib, holier-than-thou asshole about it in ways that may actually have made you MORE resistant to civic participation.
And you're right: it doesn't make that big a difference whether I personally vote or not, or whether you do. But if there are hundreds of us, and I think there are, then each of those people individually do starts to matter.
I guess I would humbly request that you and I both pay attention to what people who need help are actually asking for. I would ask that we both notice who wins when we abdicate this single responsibility. I would remind us both that participating in the electoral process is not some kind of weird either-or with participating in decentralized community building and mutual aid, and the best people we know do both. Isn't it interesting that somehow, insidiously, without even consciously becoming aware of this belief, we have started to think that you can only do one or the other? Who is telling us that story? Who does it serve?
Anyway. I took the stupid 90 minute round trip to my polling place which was VERY hot for some reason and I stood in the stupid line and some babies waved at me and I cast my vote for Kamala Harris and I'm glad I did it in the same way I'm glad after I do the dishes or take a stupid shower. Doing work doesn't always feel like anything. I also saw a really wonderful small black and white dog that I thought was a cat on a leash. I would not have seen that dog if I hadn't gone to vote. So politics can still make you feel good!!!
*I mean all this analysis is cute and everything BUT ALSO i did switch antidepressants twice in the last year, an astonishingly grueling process that almost made me [affect the trout population]. Could these things be related? hmmmmmmm, don't understand the question, won't respond to it.
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iid-smile · 5 months ago
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bedtime , kaji ren
x fem!girlfriend!reader ! kaji affectionately calls you an idiot, plus him making the reader sleep. secret kissy??! :O
author's note: idek what to put here ngl but this is just cute! i feel like kaji is the kind of guy who would enjoy watching you sleep. not in a weird way, but it makes him feel like you're safe around him yk??? enjoy!
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it's midnight. friday, transitioning to saturday.
you and kaji are just laying in his bed, facing each other. not touching, just facing each other.
his headphones were on, and you could hear the beats of the music, obviously turned down in consideration for your own ears. his eyes were closed but he's not asleep, giving you the perfect opportunity to trace your own all over his face, admiring all of his features. even though he doesn't, you've always found kaji extremely attractive. he's so pretty...
his eyes, always so sharp. his eyebrows, always furrowed at you, especially when you say something weird. and his mouth, oh, his mouth. his lips and teeth combined is the best. the way his lips get all sticky when you smear his lollipop all over before you kiss him, and the way his canines would peak out every time he puts a new sucker in his mouth... he just looks like a puppy in your eyes.
"ren?" you quietly call out to him. he couldn't hear you, but he felt your breath on his face.
he hums as a response, letting you know he was listening. you see how his eyes open slightly, gaze fixed on you. every couple of seconds, he would slightly move his jaw in a way to silently ask if you were going to say something, or if you were just going to say his name again. he was patiently waiting for you to speak.
"take these off.." you say gently, pointing at his headphones.
he takes a second or two to process the request in his mind, before raising his eyebrows in question. he was wondering why he needed to remove them. but he does love you, and if you wanted him to hear you, then he'd do just that. after another second or two, he slowly reaches a hand up and pulls the headphones from his ears, letting them fall around his neck. "why?"
"just wanna enjoy the silence with you." is your reply, and you shift a little closer to him. "and see your pretty face in full."
kaji slowly lifts up a hand and gently smacks your cheek. actually, it wasn't a smack, more like aggressive patting if anything. it was kind of a way of telling you that your statement was stupid, in the most caring way possible. "don't be weird." he mumbles.
"i'm being serious." you pout. he slowly lifts his other hand up to also pat your other cheek. for some reason, you willingly lift your head off the pillow a bit to let it happen.
"well seriously, quit bein' freakin' weird." he says softly. "don't want you to get tired because you're stayin' up all night. i'm not some kind of damn art exhibit."
"could be."
you could see how his face was threatening to turn into a scowl, but it doesn't. "seriously. go to bed. i don't care that you want to look at me or whatever, but i'm not gonna let the idiot i love stay up all night." he says quietly, his eyes narrowing just a fraction more.
somehow, your brain seems to have removed what he said on the start, and specifically focused on those last words. what a way to subtly say "i love you".
"mm..."
"sleep."
"'kay."
kaji very slowly lets go of your cheeks. once he's sure you've listened, he pats your cheek lightly one more time before his hand falls to his pillow once again. "there. that wasn't that hard, was it?" he starts to mumble again, his eyes tiredly watching you. a sigh exits through your nose, and you succumb to your fatigue.
you slept quite well that night, knowing that there's somebody right by your side to protect you, even if it was just nightmares. or did you imagine the part where something pressed against your lips?
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radiocmyk · 5 months ago
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“It’s obviously valid to be bugkin but you also can’t just expect people to get over it when they have a genuine fear!”
I’m afraid of dogs.
Dogs put me extremely on edge. I avoid them while outside and if one’s in a room with me I’ll try to leave or else start to panic. Especially medium-sized and larger breeds. Mere images of dogs may not give me a panic attack, I will admit that, it's not a phobia. But if you want to talk hypocrisy, if you're opening up that discussion:
Hey dog therians, dog otherhearted folks and clinical cynanthropes, what if everywhere you went, the unspoken attitude of the alterhuman community was—
Don’t post dog photos or talk about being a dog in the main alterhuman tags. Don’t talk about your shifts, your instincts, or your kind in the main tags. If you’re a CZ, don’t talk so openly about your biological reality. It’s extremely triggering for people with cynophobia. The idea of physically being or becoming a dog grosses them out to briefly think about, so try not to discuss your literal existence. If you must, at least trigger tag yourself with #tw dogs or #tw dog mention so people can stay safe by censoring things that will hurt their mental health. It’s okay if you’re dogkin but in my DNI I'm going to write something like, don’t follow me if your blog hosts too many graphic close-up images of dogs doing dog things, even if you censor them. Don’t add dog photos to open posts in the alterhuman tags, you have no idea who might be sent into a panic attack by images of yourself so you should play it safe and only put them on your own posts. And stop being so offended by people who comment on posts about pet dogs or dog facts saying they want to bleach their eyes or kill it with fire, they can’t help having a phobia.
Not great, is it? Fortunately, and I do genuinely mean that, this is a sentiment you will only see once, on this post, completely satirically. Except it’s just a real sentiment for bug therians/hearted and other invertebrate alterhumans. Of course what I said was satire. But if it pissed you off when you thought it might not be, please, contemplate on that reaction, really spend some time on it.
Also, if you're wondering what I mean by "other invertebrate alterhumans", (and I'm sorry for how heated I got when I was writing this part last night even after editing it down)
You know I’m a bug zoanthrope too, not just a bird? And see above if you're wondering why I never said shit about it, just said I was a centipede therian and even then said I was just questioning and didn't really talk much about it. Am I allowed to talk about it without tagging it #tw body horror, even though I obviously don’t fucking find my own body to be horror? Can I talk about it without tagging it #tw bugs like just the very thing that I am needs to be censored for people's well-being? I'm sorry if I come across judgmental. Offline I constantly interact with people saying they’re a nature lover but centipedes are the only thing on Earth that they still hate. And I have to come online knowing that any of those people could be bloggers in the alterhuman tags and it’s my responsibility to tiptoe around them. “Because centipedes are scary and disgusting.” Because I’m scary and disgusting. My brain is not capable of hearing a difference and I can’t change that. It is so much my reality that it's the same emotional mix of anger and anxiety and hurt that would be (has been, lol) triggered by someone ranting about how much they hate Jews or trans people to me.
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soft-pine · 2 months ago
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spn20rewatch: 1.18 something wicked
say your desk is covered with a pile of paperclips. something wicked is the magnet you drop in the middle and then they all stick to it; they're all connected.
it's all here. the parentification, the neglect, the way john treats dean which sam doesn't witness, the extreme likelihood that john was using his kids as bait, and the intentional, specific, glorious, lovely ways dean has specifically chosen not to be like his dad.
in the flashbacks, we see dean is in charge of feeding and looking after sam for (at least) three days in some random motel room with the shades drawn. he's not even supposed to go outside. he doesn't have a number for john, just the instruction that if john's not back by a certain time, he's supposed to call pastor jim.
we see john giving dean instructions and responsibility (and criticisms) which he's not giving to sam.
dean is at most 11 years old (ep takes place in 2006. dean says the case from when he was a kid was 16-17 years ago (1989/1990). john's journal places it in 1988; dean was 9)
crucially, even as an adult, dean barely talks to sam about what he remembers of the case when he was a kid. he lets go of little bits at a time and absolutely necessary to the case. but he does not want to process what happened. even when he's so torn up that he breaks down and explains what happened, he doesn't want to talk about it. in part, of course, because he's ashamed of failing to kill the shtriga. but also because dean keeps john's secrets (9.07). and even when he doesn't, sam is not who he tends to process with.
but it's deeply impactful to have an episode where we get to see how dean was treated as a child versus how he treats the kids he meets.
dean is so kind to children throughout season 1, from lucas in 1.03 to lily and charlie in 1.05 to michael here. there is something so great about the way he is both clear that the bad things aren't these kid's fault, while also understanding kids have agency and insight.
i know dean is torn up about using michael as bait for the shtriga but feels he doesn't have much of a choice in order to stop the thing. but the conversation he has with michael is so thorough it really gets me.
DEAN: This camera has night vision on it so we'll be able to see clear as day.... Are we good? SAM: A hair to the right... There, there. MICHAEL: What do I do? DEAN: Just stay under the covers. MICHAEL: And if it shows up? DEAN: We'll be right in the next room. We're gonna come in with guns. So, as soon as we do you roll off this bed and you crawl under it. MICHAEL: What if you shoot me? DEAN: We won't shoot you. We're good shots. We're not going to fire until you're clear ok? Have you heard a gunshot before? MICHAEL: Like in the movies? DEAN: It's gonna be a lot louder than in the movies. So I want you to stay under the bed, cover your ears, do not come out until we say so. You understand? DEAN: Michael, you sure you wanna do this? DEAN: You don't have to, it's ok, I won't be mad. MICHAEL: No I'm ok. Just don't shoot me. DEAN: We're not going to let anything happen to you. I promise.
what a specific contrast that is with
DEAN hesitates, terrified. As he does JOHN bursts through the front door, gun raised. JOHN: (Shouting) Get out of the way! DEAN ducks and JOHN shoots the shtriga multiple times with his hand gun.
something wicked is up there with monster at the end of the book for episode titles that'll make you crazy if you think about it too much.
some other thoughts are just, the first time i watched this scene i thought i was going to explode with love:
DEAN: Yeah well, first of all, I'm not going to open fire in a freakin' pediatrics ward.... Second, wouldn't have done any good, because the bastard's bullet proof unless he's chowing down on something. And third, I wasn't packing, which is probably a really good thing cause I probably would have just burned a clip in him on principle alone.
moral compass boy i would die for you a thousand times and get up and gladly do it again.
and nothing - i mean nothing - hits like dean's voice cracking over the "if it means anything sometimes i do too." like i could actually go insane.
also watching supernatural is how you fill up a computer disc with pictures of dean looking ever so beautiful. like. look at him!! ethereal!!
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also also ilu microaggression michael. they should have brought you back in the finale, king.
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sevens-evan · 2 years ago
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idk maybe i'm being a whiny mra or a hysterical white woman or whatever it's #ontrend to call trans men these days but there is a very specific kind of bullying that is like. hypernormalized in online queer spaces especially but also extremely common irl. where cis women, esp cis queer women, will try to convince you that it is a) normal and b) harmless to just be mean to people because they're men. just. tell you to your face that you should kill yourself for being a man and then when you say hey that's fucked up they go no it isn't you're just a fragile loser male. try being less sensitive. idk if it's Literally gaslighting but it sure feels like it is. directly hurting someone and then saying no, i didn't hurt you, you hurt yourself by being fragile and pathetic. and it fucking gets in your head too bc i was literally out here for Years following people on this website who would make like 15 posts a day about how men should be shot in the streets or whatever and they had me convinced that i Deserved to see that stuff and Deserved to hate myself for being trans because that was just proof that i was being weak and fragile. as if being upset by someone hating you for an inherent aspect of your identity isn't the most rational response on earth lol
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rubra-wav · 11 months ago
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Hello! I saw asks were open and I wanted to drop a request! What if Husk, Angeldust, and Alastor (separate) had a s/o who revealed that they could break deals on their (the collared's) end given some time?
Husk, Angel Dust and Alastor with a Dealbreaker S/O
[Part 2]
A/N: Alastor's is written as purely platonic tho per my personal boundaries
My Hazbin OC actually is a powerful Dealbreaker, so I'm going off of the lore I've thought up on this topic for him haha
I will maybe write a part 2 where reader actually manages to break the contracts rather than just saying they could.
CW: Sfw, angsty asf in places, reference to addiction, mention/reference to violence, Angel's touches a bit more on abuse response/trauma response type stuff, body/ horror imagery in Alastor's (Alastor being the creature he is basically)
Husk
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- Husk would not believe you at all at first.
- He would be tending the bar and then stop mid-drying a glass as a heartbreaking hint of hope (the first hope he'd felt in centuries) passes over his face for a second before crumpling and turning to extreme bitterness.
- "That's not funny." He'd growl through grit teeth at you, thinking it was some kind of cruel joke.
- When reassured that you are absolutely serious, he gives you more of a look of almost pity, sighing as if deeply tired.
- He tells you that multiple people have told him the same thing over the years, and that they have all failed just the same.
- All skilled people who were known to be able to break even soul ownership deals wide open.
- The leash Alastor had on him was air-tight.
- He basically tells you it would be a giant waste of time and that you should give up and focus your time on something better then a poor old sinner like himself.
- When you don't back down from the discouragement, he sighs again, but feels warmth burning in his chest at the fact you wanted to help him so badly.
- He's not hopeful, but he wants to have faith in you even if he's trying to discourage you and scare you straight as much as possible.
- He wants so badly to be free so he can be with you without any limits of his commitment to you and only you. To not have to think about whether he's going to be summoned to some bullshit getup again whenever Alastor gets bored of the Hazbin Hotel.
- Deep down he's absolutely desperate for you to succeed in your mission.
- He wants the catalyst for his alcohol problem to go away so he can live and finally actually be happy without the heaviness of his deal weighing on him at all times, making him desperately need the escape.
- He absolutely will tell you very very seriously to not to let this slip that you're doing this to anybody though - or talk about this in a place you aren't absolutely confident doesn't have any certain member of the hotel listening in.
- Husk doesn't think that Alastor would harm you physically over this, that asshole would probably just find it amusing. However.
- Husk's worst fear would be you trying to get him his soul back by signing away yours, something very possible Alastor would offer as a trick.
- He'd be skeptical, fearful of you succumbing to a deal with Alastor, and not very hopeful at all as he's tried time and time again to break the contract on his soul. You are so... optimistic that you'll find a way, but again, his collar is air-tight. You'll have your work cut out for you breaking the deal of someone who's notoriously a dealmaker.
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Angel Dust
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- When you tell him that, he tenses up with a sharp inhale of breath, a complete 180 from how he just was seconds before, winding down from his night in his hotel room with you.
- Angel's deal would be logically way more easier to break. However, what Valentino's deal doesn't directly hold of Angel, the moth's manipulation keeps him stuck imprisoned under him.
- Angel absolutely would have thought of contacting a dealbreaker, however never actually would due to how terrified he is. If it turned out one of those people were a mole for Val trying to catch him out, Angel would be in so much pain from the punishment that that would entail. You cannot trust someone claiming to be a dealbreaker in hell isn't lying to you through their teeth.
- When he realises you are absolutely serious though, and obviously confident in your abilities, a myriad of harsh emotions pass across Angel's face. Fear (for both his and your safety), and hope made themselves the most apparent.
- Fear of what Val would do to him if he ever found out about this conversation. What he'd do to you.
- Valentino was certainly not above hurting people to get his way. Angel knew that better then anybody. But if Val ever caught wind that Angel's secret lover behind the scenes was trying to steal away Val's biggest money maker and favourite toy, he'd kill you. Straight up.
- That fear was there and was deeply terrifying to him. But so was the hope. A flurry of hope that fills him with relief and brings tears pricking at his eyes at the idea that he could actually be free of his captor and go do whatever you two decide and be fully happy without fear of Val.
- Live with you not as Angel Dust, but as Anthony. Completely his real, authentic self.
- "How." He whispers breathlessly.
- You tell him that you need to see the contract itself, analyse all the ins and outs and come up with a counter-contract.
- There would be a few ways you could actually break the deal from there, and although they would be time consuming and possibly (very much probably) dangerous, you were confident you could break him out.
- Angel would be extremely fearful, but also hopeful. You seem confident in your ability as his contract is messy and poorly crafted. He's reassured as you say that what's mostly chaining him down is the psychological control Val has over him.
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Alastor
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- When you tell Alastor this, I feel he could respond two ways depending on how you've learnt that information.
If he hasn't told you himself:
- If he hasn't told you this or doesn't know how you've found out, he's going to be absolutely pissed. At you and probably Husk (assuming Husk told you)
- He'd turn towards you with jerky, unnatural movements, bones and joints cracking loudly in a cringe worthy way. Overhead, the lights would be flickering as static begins to fill your head.
- Towering over you, he'd be still bent in that weird position as he grips sharpened claws into your shoulders. Your friendship is the only thing keeping him from making you nothing more then a stain on the wall.
- "Who told you about that."
- When you tell how you've found out, he likely let's out a chuckle dripping with anger that makes you want to cover your ears as the sound scrapes into them. "And what makes you think you could do what even I cannot?"
- He has analysed every single last clause, letter, meaning of the words used, every possible loophole in his contract to the point it's driven him to have multiple psychological breakdowns. To him there is no doubt in his mind at all that he's completely fucked by the contract he was tricked into and there's no chance in hell that you would ever be able to even assist.
- When you push and say that you want to do this for him, he's not even a little flattered at all, in fact, it bruises his ego massively that you'd have the audacity to confidently imply you could do what he's worked so hard to for 7 years.
- In instance one, he's incredibly pissed off at you for claiming you could ever undo his contract after learning about it from someone other then him, so angry he almost kills you. Leaves you alone shaking and afraid in the hall telling you not to say anything to anybody else about his deal, and to never so flagrantly exaggerate your own worth so massively again. Your prior confidence stamped down to embers.
If you are close enough of a person to him that he's confided in you about his collar however:
- He'd just chuckle, calling it cute that you thought you could do that while walking away.
- You miss the way his eye twitches.
- He'd still be incredibly angry about it, but due to not being surprised you knew of his biggest secret, he'd hide it much better.
- Continues to laugh when you insist you can do it, and would passive aggressively respond about how you should not overestimate your abilities and mind your own business essentially.
- Again, he's pissed off and his ego is bruised about it. But this time, he's hiding it behind his smile and is passive aggressive as fuck about it rather then outwardly aggressive. He won't let you know how much you've actually gotten to him even though he would have let his walls down to some extent to ever tell you that.
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A/N I was actually already planning a fully written x reader fic that's not just the dot points with Angel at some point where reader saves him from his contract, so like... Maybe I'll do full fics for dealbreaking Husk and Alastor's contracts as well because I'm kind of interested in exploring a fic w them after writing this now
(I'm probably gonna say this then eat shit via the universe straight after lmfao 💀)
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copperbadge · 6 months ago
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how did u psych urself up to go to therapy? my executive function has been awol for like 2 years and it's gotten to the point where it's wrecking my ability to do anything. i'm scared to waste a bunch of time and money going and getting told i'm just lazy or that the problem is just me
Happy to talk about that! But this is really two issues, so I gotta do a fly-by real first on "scared of getting told I'm just lazy". :D
It sounds to me like you're aware intellectually that laziness isn't the issue. You know this is an executive function issue and not a personal flaw, but I definitely get that it's hard to internalize that. So I'm going to drop links here to some discussion of "laziness":
How do you know you're not just lazy? (ask sent to me -- it's long, but you can skim for the laziness bits if you want.)
Lack of motivation means you are avoiding pain (second ask in response to the first)
Laziness Does Not Exist by Devon Price
These are essentially my proofs when I want to remind you that laziness is a label that stigmatizes an innate behavior -- inability to act is real, laziness is not. If a therapist tells you that you are lazy, and ESPECIALLY that you are the problem, you should fire that therapist. Don't even stay the rest of the session if you don't want to, just say "I see we are not compatible," and bounce. I don't think the odds are high that you'll encounter that, but on the off-chance that you do, that's a bright neon sign that they're a bad therapist.
In fact I would open with that pitch: "I'm struggling with executive function and the self-perception that I'm really just lazy. I need help with the actual executive function issues but also with how I view myself because of them." The therapist's response will tell you a lot about whether they'd be a good fit.
So with that out of the way...
I eased myself into therapy with the speed of a small child entering an extremely cold lake. It helped a lot that all of my therapy has been virtual via Zoom, so a lot of stuff that would have been a barrier, like going to the physical appointments, discomfort in a strange space, etc. were swept away.
I didn't even want to see a psychiatrist for my Adderall prescription, but I knew I needed help and medication seemed to be my best option, so with the assurances of several people that it wasn't therapy so much as mental health maintenance, I saw a psychiatrist. And he was lovely! (I just met with him yesterday to go over my next few months of scrip.) For a while that was all I did: talked every month to a kind person who asked specific and measurable questions about my mental health -- mood, sleep patterns, ability to work, hobbies -- without getting especially personal. I thought, okay, I can handle this, I can probably handle more, so I asked him for a recommendation for a therapist.
He looked at the network of independent practitioners he belonged to (Clarity Clinic Chicago, if you want an example of a good network) and found me a couple of options. I got extremely lucky to find someone I felt was appropriate for me right out of the gate, though some of that was also knowing what criteria I had: I wanted someone who explicitly stated they specialized in adult ADHD and disability, and who seemed like they were interested in addressing a whole person and not a single issue. When we met she seemed nice, wasn't pushy or judgey, was familiar with spoon theory and disability activism because she also has ADHD, and didn't blink (or ask overly invasive questions) when I said I was very uneasy about therapy because of past experience. She was comfortable with the ambiguity I brought -- I basically said "Look, I think this is something I need but I'm not entirely sure what my goals are yet, it's just I only recently found out I have ADHD and I am rethinking a lot of stuff," and she was like fine, let's rethink it together.
It still took me a long time to start talking about anything meaningful, but she handled the non-meaningful stuff as if it was serious and important, which helped. Admittedly I have really good insurance so I pay $20 a session for therapy, which also helps; it's pretty negligible in terms of health costs for me. I can afford to dawdle.
So, all that said...my path may not be an option for you, but I think it indicates the kinds of options you have. You don't have to jump into serious and heavily emotional processing first thing if you don't want to. You can shop around for therapists and you can drop any bad ones you encounter speedily, or if you find one you immediately like you can still spend time getting comfortable before dropping into the heavier stuff.
I would suggest that if you have a prescribing psych or doctor for any kind of mental health meds, ask them if they have a recommendation. If you don't have that, ask around people you know or believe have access to therapy and see what they think. If those aren't available to you or you're uncomfortable with that, I'd do a search for licensed therapist and your health insurance, or see if your workplace has an employee assistance program that can recommend you someone.
Good luck! I hope you get what you need. Lord knows I've been there.
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