#I'm gonna eat watermelon
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alarrytale · 1 year ago
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Agree about the gray hair. I find it odd that fans call him a silver fox and think it's a compliment when it's a phrase used to describe an attractive guy in his 50s or 60s, not a 31 year old. Gray hair isn't the same texture as other hair, it's wiry and you get that grizzled texture. He could have got red highlights to cover it up to match the FITF aesthetic.
I find it odd too. Whatever floats their boats i guess? (It couldn’t be me). I think if he were to dye it fans would be just as enthused (if not more). I don't think highlights is enough at this point to cover it up, almost his whole hair is gray. He went gray super fast. Like he's so much grayer now than he was just months ago.
I also find it odd that Louis dosn't dye it. Harry did! Niall did, and i suspect also Liam did. Not having gray hair will shave 10 years off him. Even if he's forever lost the soft texture of his hair, at least it will look better dyed than it is looking now. Now he looks much older than he is. His lifestyle isn't doing him any favours in that department either.
Maybe Harry really loves the gray look on him? (I doubt it). Or is it a point to look older than 31 (I don't think so). So what's the deal here? Somone ask him in an interview. I'd love to know.
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keeps-ache · 2 months ago
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ooo that's minty babyyy
#just me hi#almost wrote 'babuuu' up there loll#anywho i got gum yesterday cuz i'm tryna stop chewing on my. everything hkfsh#lips + cheeks + finger skin. i don't like cuts v-v#i got miiiiiiiiint because they didn't have waaaaaaatermelon hbfsh :)#it's not so burny but i do still wish i had watermelon... ou....#//i wanna do something rn but i don't. know. wghat#pi.e is always welcome but i wanna work on bl.s but i'm also having my siblings play through a story that i have Stuck in my brain so hkfsh#i didn't think i'd get so Brained abt this one. and because i had them play it before i had an actual plot ready(just had basic world stuff#i can't think of this going any other way hbfshv - lotta fun interesting and weird things have happened that simply cannot be reproduced#/hang on my oven food must be turned lol#okey :3#/like the spy they ran into - idk if i've ever talked abt it lol but m gonna do so now hbfsjv#so they - my brothers whose names are fry and leo in this story. fry is an 8 yo tabby-cat sparrow and leo is the cat-dog-rat thing Shock :)#- anywho they're with the character Teddy and the three of them were going to head to the Crow Fortress to. fight them i guess lol ?? there#wasn't a like. real plan jfhsjv#so they're on their way out from the shore village-turned-fortress called Shimmery Shore and they run into a cloaked figure like a couple#miles off going towards Shimmery Shore (where fry's mother runs the fortress as general) and they start debating each other#fry goes 'wait what if this is a spy??' leo 'i dunno. we're going somewhere. so.' 'but if it's a spy??' 'well what are you going to do abou#it???' so fry asks the stranger 'are you.. a Spy [eyebrow raise]?' the stranger obviously says 'no!! what are you talking about???'#'that's exactly what a spy would say!' 'i'm sure a spy would also be saying the same thing! YOU'RE spies aren't you? this is all greatly#suspicious !!'#and the argument quickly came to the stranger pulling a sword and saying 'i'm going to pass now and you're not going to stop me' and the#group p much just put up their hands and went 'okay yeah sure man' and let them pass lol#the Squad argued abt it for like a couple minutes and then forgot about it shortly#anyway Shimmery Shore later fell to the Crows and it was due to some sort of slow collapse of their internal structures. and when they hear#that the two of them slowly looked at each other. and then started laughing kjhfsjgjhsv#anyway yea i do a lot of thinkin for this one on the fly. lotta stuff going on hbghfs#i'm bad at remembering finer details but at least i can keep my world here together lol :3#//ouh i've run out of tags.. okay m gonna eat my food n then do something hfh :) tooooodles !!
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dalishthunder · 6 months ago
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#I hate my body#Not because of the normal reasons of like... being fat and having a uterus or anything like that#I hate that it fails so so so often#I hate that my doctor wants me to give up fruit because my body just has too high triglycerides and can't convert them properly#I hate that my body makes too much cholesterol#I hate that my thyroid doesn't produce the right hormones#I hate that my brain wants to self destruct all the time#I hate that I've had to cut out basically all of the salt from my diet because my body can't regulate my blood pressure#I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it#I hate that I have to take so many goddamn pills all the time#I hate how expensive it is to maintain#I hate that I finally want to live and my body is actively trying to kill me#I hate the my wrists give out#I hate that I'm losing my hearing#I hate that there's a god awful ringing ringing ringing in my ears that I will never be able to escape#I hate that no matter what I do it's just never fucking *enough*#I hate that I'm only 30 and now I'm not supposed to eat bananas or pineapples or watermelon or passionfruit or enjoy alcohol#what else can I whittle away from my life?#AND THERE'S NO ACTUAL MEDICAL PROOF THAT THIS WILL WORK#anyways I'm going to see my brother next weekend#and we're gonna go hiking#I'm just... fucking done#'you're going to have a heart attack if you don't fix this'#you know I carved the word inadequate into my skin when I was 18#the T is still there the rest of it has faded with time#.... yeah#odt#vent#My body will always be inadequate#an inhospitable wasteland that I am trying so so hard to cultivate in
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nochepsicodelica · 2 months ago
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NSFW
"Toji," you groan, annoyed by him swooping in again to steal, yet another, piece of fruit off your fork. "You said you didn't want any."
"You made it look good, doll. No one should look that good while eating a piece of watermelon. I'm doing you a favor by eating it."
You chuckle, amused by his reasoning. "Doing me a favor... and why do I need this favor?"
"I'm not making myself clear, am I? No one should look that good while eating a piece of watermelon."
You gasp dramatically and pick up your bowl of mixed fruit, moving it away from him. "Let me eat in peace, you horndog." You pick up another piece of fruit, and shove it into your mouth. "Stop watching me," you say, muffled by your mouthful.
"Gonna pounce on you when you're done," he says, his tone so serious that it has your heart racing. You nearly choke on your piece of pineapple, your hand going to your mouth to prevent you from spitting it out. You swallow the fruit and stare at him silently for a few seconds. "Quit delaying the inevitable. Eat up, doll."
He stayed true to his word. The second you finished the last piece of fruit in the bowl, Toji threw you over his shoulder and dragged you with him to the bedroom. He laid you down and immediately made your space, his. He spent so much time on your lips, kissing, sucking, and biting them. He could briefly taste the sweetness that adhered to your lips when the pieces of fruit you had initially made contact with them. He didn't want to stop the kisses, but fuck, the sweetness and your little hums made his aching cock twitch. He needed you so bad.
It was like he was trying to steal your tongue's memory of the fruit's flavor. You couldn't catch your breath with the way his thrusts knocked the wind out of your lungs and his lips relentlessly enveloped yours. You had to turn your head at some point, to get some air and in response to that, he cupped your jaw and faced you back towards him, a smooth "come here, mama," rolling off his tongue before he connected his lips to yours, again.
He swallowed every one of your sounds, hellbent on kissing your lips raw, and when you came, you bit his lip. He was on the brink of busting his load because of the gesture, so you got a little breather while he got himself there. Your break from his lips allowed you to release your breathy moans that eventually simmered down to whimpers when he spilled his load into you.
Once you both caught your breaths and the room was still, he pulled out and lied down beside you, pulling you into his side. You rested your head on his chest and laughed, the bubbly sound luring his gaze onto you.
"What are you laughing about?" He asks, flicking your forehead, the brief furrow of your brows making him grin.
"Gonna put this on the list of things I can't do unless I wanna get dug out by you."
"Mm... that list is pretty long, huh?"
A satisfied, almost dreamy sigh, leaves your lips. "Yeah..."
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skykashi · 1 year ago
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#I agree with the person before me who said it's not possibly a coincidence that Kakashi is always holding a watermelon
I also noticed that every time Kakashi is holding a watermelon, Naruto his kids would always be eating lots of watermelon while we've never seen HIM eating watermelon so maybe Kakashi doesn't really like watermelons and he's just satisfying Naruto's his kids huge watermelon appetite like the Papashi he is XD
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OH SHIT-
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.. whatever
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bvnnywrites · 1 year ago
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Still Waters Run Deep
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Chapter 1: Apple of His Eye
PAIRING: Eldritch!König x Reader
AUTHOR'S NOTE: As I've said before, English isn't my first language, so this would e fun. Hehe. I'm so excited to share this fic with you guys hehehehe. I'm posting this on both Tumblr and Ao3. Who knows, the story on the other site would be different hm...? I'm not telling when, but hehe. Also, reader is in her twenties, specifically 22, so yayeet. If you don't like how fucked up this story is gonna get then please turn around and go on your merry way. I'll be posting the first chapter here on Tumblr because jesus, my ao3 invitation has yet to arrive. Also, don't forget to write comments, I need feedback because I eat them like it's groceries-
WARNING: NON-CON/DUB-CON, DARK, SMUT, NSFW, Creampie, Breeding Kink, Fingering, Stomach Bulge, Age Gap, Unprotected Sex, Cockwarming, Implied Discharge, Power Imbalance, Abuse of Authority, No Beta Reader, Dom! König, Size Kink, Size Difference, Cannibalism, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, Cannibalistic Thoughts, Older!König, Eldritch!König, Monster!König, Masturbation, Dark Romance, Blood and Gore, Violence, Monsterfucking
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WHENEVER A CERTAIN COLONEL PASSES BY the soldiers would grow quiet, as if he’s sucking the joy with him and then the chatter would continue once his thundering footsteps would fade away into quietness.
A silence would hang over the air for a brief moment – like they’re making sure the danger has passed before proceeding – and the soldiers would continue to chat once they're sure it was safe to proceed. Babbling away but their voices would be a bit hushed, as if their ears were on the lookout for the colonel’s presence.
The colonel was absolutely – you remember his name being König because you saw him score several shots using a sniper rifle in training – wholeheartedfuckingly terrifying.
König strides confidently across the battlefield and KorTac base of Operations in the same damn manner—Arrogant, egotistical, prideful. The mountain of a man walks in like he owns the place, and troops would be so relieved if they see him in the battlefield because they know that he'd be able to turn the tides to their favor.
And the fucker knows it. He knows people look up at him. Looking at him like the fucking messiah that would save them right then and there.
He relished in it.
And he was so fucking gigantic as he is muscular too, to the point his huge hands could definitely crush your head with his fingers if he saw fit. To say he was a Greek God was insulting. No, he was like Kronos.
Destructive.
All-devouring force.
Whenever you stood too close to him—even tho you recall not stepping too close to the colonel because you wanted to respect the five-foot rule for everyone lest they give you the go signal to hog their personal space like Izzy does—you can see the way his muscles would bulge whenever he tightened his fists, or how the veins on his arms were so… alluring, and holy shit he has scars. Battle scars that should've repulsed you but you find yourself wanting to trace it with your fingers.
His form is almost mesmerizing—like how you'd imagine Fenrir slaying Odin from one of the Norse Myths.
However, like Fenris Wolf, he too was bound and shackled to base. Most of the time, at least. You would see him buried and drowning and several paperwork when you go to his office while Roze waited for you by the door.
And you could see his baby blue eyes squint and conjure a glint of annoyance as you hand him your report. He has pretty eyes, that colonel. He doesn’t speak to you, always uttering grunts or huffs. Dismissing you with a wave of his hand—always gestures but never talking.
It reminds you of gray skies and blue muted waters, and sometimes they seemed vibrant when you hear the sinister glee in his voice of bashing an enemies head open like how watermelon breaks – and then he'd look at you and you'd immediately avert your gaze because oh god that would be so fucking awkward if your superior had caught you staring at his eyes like a creep.
As mentioned before, König is mostly quiet, and you didn't really hear him talk since he never talked to you at all. In the battlefield, when he barked out orders, gunfire would drown them and those closest to him would relay the message on to the others.
Lieutenant Izzy – Izanami actually, but she preferred being called Izzy – always spoke in Japanese, but she can speak a few broken English words. She didn’t seem to see you as a liability, often asking you out to grab lunch with her and Captain Roze. The white-haired girl always made sure you never missed your meals, and if you did, she’d make sure to hand you some MREs for the sake of making sure you’re taken care of.
She said to you once, “Be careful of that colonel, he is… what is English word that for… word you use when object is not good to you—harms life.”
“You mean dangerous?” Roze would correct her. “We really need to work on your English, girl.”
“Yes, that the word I’m looking for.” Izzy would laugh. “ローズ先輩、訂正してくれてありがとう。”
Roze, on the other hand, was more closed off. She was ruthless and strict, but you’re convinced that she cares about you the same way Izzy does because she gets this soft glint in her eyes when you tell her that you forgot to eat or missed lunch. Then five seconds later you’d feel an MRE smacking you on the chest, and Roze is barking at you for being stupid enough to not eat and say you’re lucky that her and Izzy are looking out for you.
But you can tell that both are highly protective of you, like older sisters making sure their youngest sibling didn't fuck up on missions or get hung by their rib by enemy soldiers.
Whenever the colonel passed by, you remember Roze’s words “Keep your gaze down” because apparently there was an incident where König had beaten the shit out of a recruit because the poor thing looked at him funny. Something about the recruit scrunching his face in disgust at the colonel or was it because he had mocked him behind his back? 
Either way, the kid was beaten to a pulp. 
The colonel was never given a court martial, however, since he had been able to pull rank it seems. Roze was the one who told you during lunch, voice in a hushed whisper.
Then your thoughts wander back to the nightly horror stories your soldiers would tell to one another. You had a habit of visiting them before making sure they all slept on curfew time. It was fun and it helped boost morale amongst the troops. It also helped that you were a younger lieutenant, so you were able to easily connect to your platoons’ humor and quip remarks. 
You remember the hushed whispers in the barracks, each of them uttering stories of what König might look like beneath the mask.
You often thought maybe he looks so mutilated that it resembles Nemesis from Resident Evil or maybe Salvatore on the Village Version. But you've seen the pretty blue eyes König possessed and you just know that deep down, he was a handsome man. 
Sure, he was old enough to be your dad, had a huge ass age gap that's wider than the forehead of the colonel of the Mexican Special Forces you had previously worked with due to König being forty-five years old, but you'll admit a pretty man if you see one.
However, your soldiers' claims were way more hilarious as they spoke. Each sounding absurd and stupid than the last.
"I heard he has three faces, like the demon Asmodeus. I mean, I wouldn't be surprised if he's a prince of Hell in disguise. Have you seen his body? What I'd give to climb him like a tree." 
"I could've sworn I saw worms underneath. Kind of like maybe a maggot-infested lower jaw since I heard the skin of his jaw had been burnt off."
"I think he has the face only a mother could love. Men like that exist."
You had grown up in a small town, people believing heavily in superstitious beliefs. However, once you've left said small town, you realize that they were silly things that old people simply uttered into the wind.
"Did you know a psychic said I would get murdered when I was ten?" You laughed at the absurdity of it all, wanting to add some scary shit of your own.
"Really, L.T?" One of your soldiers said. "Oh, this has to be good!"
“Yeah. I remember she was very old, and if I were correct, I think she moved from Hallstatt? Wherever the fuck that is.”
You told them the stupid little story. How you lost twenty dollars to a fraud only for them to say you'll get murdered, and how it spooked you as a kid and made you all paranoid only to realize you just got scammed out of your money.
"The thing that will kill you is hiding its face. The thing that will kill you has its crown scraping the ceiling. The thing that will kill you has sharpened teeth. The thing that will kill you will charm you with its glamor and false promises. The thing that will kill you will devour you with its appendages and fill you with its seed. The thing that will kill you… you won't see it coming."
The soldiers all laughed, including you, after you've said it in the most croaked voice as you mimicked the old psychic. 
You've never laughed so hard in your whole life, but you were glad that it was your troops that were with you and not stuck up stoic alpha male soldiers. It wasn't real, but it didn't hurt to be cautious. 
All of you got along. 
Sure, most of the soldiers given to you were teens – because the military was just hiring eager and stupid kids, and by God you were going to protect these little shits with your life – but it was fine because they had you. For as long as you live, you promised yourself you'd make sure they were all safe.
And you took them under your wing and you feel bad because they were kids compared to you. They shouldn't be here dressing up as soldiers and being sent off to war zones with you. These kids were supposed to be at home, where they could be safe, and worrying about teen stuff. But then again, KorTac was a company at the end of the day. 
A Private Military Company—basically just glorified mercenaries at this point.
Of course, they would exploit anyone who is willing to serve for their country while also getting paid generously compared to being in a government affiliated military—Hell, you're here, aren't you? Why? Because they can be greedy fucks and capitalism exists, and KorTac rivals Disney in terms of being a well-known PMC in the military world, and you're broke. 
Not to mention that the BAS – Basic Allowance for Subsistence – was fucking higher in KorTac than the government affiliated military you used to serve in. A BAS rate of seven hundred sixty-two point sixty-nine euros for enlisted members, while officers are given the same but with an increased rate of four hundred ninety-seven point fifty- eight euros is better than the current BAS.
You also get the average of six thousand and seven hundred eighty-two euros at an average per month here in KorTac. The pay is way fucking better and you can save up money to the point you were able to pay off your own student and credit card debts and leave your parents' nest since you were basically loaded at this point. 
Money was enough to blind you from the dangers that lurked beneath the still waters that run deep that is KorTac.
"The thing that will kill you… you won't see it coming."
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“Did you hear what happened?”
“What?”
“Another soldier went missing again.”
Captain Stiletto changed her mags, examining her scope as she spoke to you with a calm voice—as if she hadn’t just dropped the news of someone going missing. Again. You were ready to hear which recruit was unlucky enough to be whisked away and never to be seen again. That or they turn up mutilated and scared, and the poor things won’t even talk. However, a missing rookie suddenly turns up out of nowhere after months of disappearing without a trace was statistically low.
No, really, it would be low—unusual at best.
The best way to analyze it would be using the Bayesian Inference, and using a probability model to express the uncertainty towards the situation. In this case, using a binary variable would be ideal, $Y$, to represent the outcome whether the missing rookie ever did turn up or not. $Y$ = 1 if the rookie is found, and $Y$ = 0 if the rookie isn’t found.
Then assume that the probability of finding said missing rookie is equal to the proportion of all missing persons who are eventually found. As evidence becomes available, then update the model with that evidence and compute the posterior distribution for the probability of finding the rookie.
In this case, if one of the higher ups discovered the rookie all pale and shaking and are obviously had been terrified to fucking death, the information in that scenario could be used to update the posterior distribution, taking into account that the probability that the rookie had seen something scary in that location, if they were ever found that is.
Once the model with all available evidence has been updated, the posterior distribution to make predictions of the probability of finding the new recruit can now be used. The officers tasked with finding them—at least those who hasn’t given up—will be able to find them within a certain time frame or calculate the probability that they’re are found alive or dead.
Just some basic statistics you’ve learned in ninth grade, that’s all. Or at least from what you can remember.
The scar that ran down the captain’s face was evident like the blood smeared in your hands when you’ve killed an enemy. No one knew why there was a huge damage to her face or why it was there in the first place. You’ve only been in KorTac for a month, almost everyone you’ve met have given you warnings and it was all the same—keep your distance from the colonel. You have half a mind to say “Fuck this” but the pay was good.
Not to mention your contract hasn’t been finished yet and you doubt you’d find a good paying job like this while doing what you love.
“Who was it?” You dared to ask.
Stiletto looks away for a moment, before turning back to you. “Private O’Neil.”
Your eyes widened at the information. You don’t know the person, but to hear a private going missing was surprising. Usually, it was the recruits who disappeared for the most part or at least from your observation in your stay here. Now that’s very strange.
“Huh… a Private? How come it wasn’t a rookie?”
“That’s what I’m thinking too.”
Stiletto responds with the same confusion as you, her lips pursed. She looks worried, unsure to react.
“The colonel had been tasked to investigate the missing cases, but even he isn’t getting any answers.” The captain says, her face troubled. “It’s like there’s a serial killer at base.”
“Like playing Mafia, huh.” You joked.
“Exactly.”
You’re scared of what this could mean. If whoever it was plucking the recruits off like grapes were about to turn to privates, then it won’t be long before your ass is on the line. You have half a mind to help, maybe offer your insights on the investigations, but thanks to Roze and Izzy’s advice, you knew better than to get too close to the colonel…
Unless you want to get beaten by König with your incompetency—what he deems incompetency—since he loves doing things his way according to the soldiers who had worked with him.
It wasn’t enough to scare the rookies, however. They’re still chatty and happy, all of them seemed unaffected by these rumours.
Of course, they’d be unaffected, everyone is telling them that it’s just rumours and the soldier that disappeared had simply been discharged for wanting to leave or go back home. There were a few who didn’t believe it, but those with higher ranks – including you – were reassuring them that it was merely rumours.
That they shouldn’t really worry their pretty little minds about it. And what infuriated you the most was because it worked. They were gullible kids, as young as sixteen to nineteen—basically a six to three years old age gap between you and them. They should know better than to believe the honeyed words from yours or their superiors’ mouth.
But could you even blame them?
They’re just kids. You and the other high-ranking officers were older than them, obviously they would trust you. They expect all of you to guide them, showing them the real ropes of war and violence unlike the trial sessions they’ve had in boot camp and the infantry.
So, really the blame was on every high ranking official—including you.
Everyone from being a specialist to the general of the army were losing their shit over these incidents because KorTac was supposed to promote opportunity and valour, but how can you do that if your fellow soldiers – doesn’t matter what rank they are – are going missing like some monster was plucking them off of their rooms one by one or rather off of the hallways when they’re past curfew.
Curfew falls under your responsibility too, sergeants up to lieutenant colonels were tasked to make sure that every rookie or corporal has to be following the curfew or rather their curfew. KorTac had implemented the curfew for the rookies up to the corporals’ weeks prior to your official employment according to Roze.
The last thing the people who called the shots wanted was a widespread panic amongst their troops.
“Do you have any hunch as to who it might be?” You asked her curiously, wanting to know the captain’s thoughts.
“It could be that newbie before you, Phillip Graves, but he’s mostly out on missions. So, that checks him out.” Stiletto answered, looking at you. “Then there could be the possibility of it being Horangi.”
“Why him?”
“He’s too violent.”
“Aren’t we all?”
Stiletto laughs at your response, shaking her head as if you’re being silly. The captain was nice, in your opinion at least. She pats you back lightly like an aunt would when you remind her of your mom when they were younger. There’s a twinkle in her eyes, one where it makes you wonder just how exactly does Stiletto see you—a daughter, sister or maybe a friend. Either way, you were in her good graces and that’s enough to quell your curiosities for now.
The two of you were practicing alone in the firing range. Those at the lower ranks had gone to sleep or were forced to sleep since it was curfew for them.
The atmosphere had gone heavy.
It was light and cheery in the morning, but at night, the happiness and laxness of the vicinity disappears, and you and the rest of the soldiers with a higher rank are faced with the reality that someone was picking off all of you one by one like candies inside your granny’s bowl of strawberry candy that you don’t see anywhere in the grocery store.
You know, the one’s you get when one day you became a grandma – or great-aunt, or even an honorary old “auntie” – and these things just magically appear at the bottom of your purse. The ones that once they start spilling out of your bag, you’ll find an intricate cut-glass bowl or dish in the middle of your living room and your grandkids or kids would just come and go while pocketing a handful of them, and the refill is somehow always in your purse.
Stiletto hands you a rosary from her pocket. You looked at the long wooden beads coated with silver chains and designs before glancing at the captain. You took it gently, letting the coolness of the holy object cool your skin that wraps around it. Oh, it’s a sweet gesture. Now you have something to wear around your neck, a little good luck charm despite the fact that you don’t really believe in God or a higher being. Her head is tilted to the side, looking at you with an analysing glance as silence befalls the two of you.
“Why…?” You asked her underneath the fluorescent lights of the firing range, riffles forgotten at each other’s side.
Stiletto shrugs, sighing tiredly, “Maybe the thing that’s picking us off one by one would be scared of the Lord.”
“I doubt he exists.”
“He’ll save you in your time of need. He answered my prayers. Maybe He’ll answer yours too.”
“What did you pray for?”
Stiletto is quiet for a moment, looking away before looking back at you with worry. She placed a hand on your shoulder, giving you a gentle squeeze.
“That you would still be alive the next time I see you… that you wouldn’t be next, lieutenant.”
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“You’re the lieutenant that Horangi had referred to the company, ja?”
A voice says with a German accent to it, and by Mary, Joseph, and the Babeh Jesus what an alluring voice he has. It was low and rough, a tad bit raspy—gravelly. You thought to yourself that if you were Persephone and you heard this voice coaxing you into the warm embrace of the Underworld, you too would have cartwheeled and backflipped into Hades’s lap. Leaving the nymphs and the flowers, and the warm sun to drown in the enticing embrace of the God of Death while he whispers sweet nothings into your ear.
You turned around, half a mind to fuck the brains out of this man until you saw who was speaking to you and all horniness came to a halt as you realized who it was.
König.
You glanced directly at his eyes briefly before averting you gaze, Roze’s warning echoing in your head. You nod your head, confirming his question. You tell him your name and rank, which country you came from, and basically any general information you can tell to confirm your identity. Konig nods his head at your words. His eyes crinkled—was he smiling underneath the sniper hood?—and you can hear a smug tone on his voice.
“Ja, leutnantin, I’ve read your files.”
“Oh.”
Your eyes glanced to the side, seeing some soldiers chattering at the end of the hall. Good. There are people around. A polite smile blossoms on your face, offering it to the colonel – just like you would whenever you bump into a senior officer. Your mind raced why he was suddenly talking to you.
HE BARELY RESPONDED SO WHY WAS HE SUDDENLT BEING A CHATTER BOX?! You internally panicked since he often responded in hums or grunts whenever you give your report, didn’t even glance at you whenever the two of you passed by each other.
So, why now?
“Did you need something, sir?” You asked him politely, tilting your head a little as you crane your head to look at him properly because holy shit, he’s so fucking tall.
“I do, actually, Schatz.” König responds, cold eyes gazing down at your smaller form. “I need your help with a… serious matter. Come with me to my office.”
His strides are big and long as you struggled to keep up with him as he walked down the halls. Your eyes glued to his massive thighs… and oh. The soldiers within the halls part like the sea as König passed by as if he was Noah. They all lower their gaze, chattering going to a halt until only the sound of the storm raging outside can be heard.
“So, why do we need to go to your office?”
But König doesn’t answer, and his hands balled to a fist. You can see the cloth crinkle as his grip dug into his palms, while he ignores your question. Which is, in a way, rude since you were simply trying to gouge out information as to why your colonel was summoning you to his office. You furrowed your brows at his actions.
“It’s the least I should know, don’t you think–”
“Are you always so noisy?”
You blinked owlishly at his words, the colonel barely looking or glancing at you as he continued to walk down the halls of KorTac. Your breath hitches in your throat as you register the slight annoyance in his voice.
He finally looks at you, eyes crinkling as he laughs. And oh god, his laugh. The mere sound of it makes your cheek warm and make both of your lips smile.
“The look on your face earlier is funny, Schatz. However, you’re a lieutenant, no? I’m sure that despite how young you are, you’re mature enough to know that there are classified things that can only be discussed within the confines of an office, ja?”
“I’m sorry, colonel. I didn’t mean to let it slip off of my head.”
You feel like winning the lottery, but the prize isn’t a billion bucks—it’s the fact that you haven’t angered the colonel, and he’s not bashing your head to the pavement or maybe stabbing you where you stand and tearing your flesh with his gloved hands.
You don’t notice the guilt that settles on your face… nor the look of softness and endearment on König’s face as he admires the look of culpability blossoms on you face.
The softness of your face, the way your eyes are filled with such an adorable shyness when you think that he would actually reprimand you for something so innocent. You were so little compared to him too, so fragile… so weak. He relishes in this power over you—power over your reactions and your expressions. You looked so eager to stay on his good side. So eager to please him in your own innocent way. Whether you intentionally do it or not, König is being pumped full of dopamine at just you talking to him.
He's had his eye on you for a long while. The moment you stepped foot on base, beneath the scorching sun of the tarmac, König wanted nothing more than to snatch you and make you his. Drag you away from KorTac, smuggle you to Austria and lock you away in his house by the sea shore, away from prying eyes.
Where he can have you all to himself.
But even his rank and reputation in KorTac couldn’t save or excuse his behaviour if he does that. Everyone would think he was a freak or someone creepy if he were to ever just scoop you up. The way your voice echoes when you bark out your orders to those inferior to you, the way it softens when you talk to your friends – especially to Horangi, and König s gnawing at the cages of his enclosure because he wished you would talk to him the way you would to Horangi.
He wants to talk again without addressing you formally, but he is awkward with connecting to people. Even when he tried to follow his psychiatrist’s advice in trying to open up to people, König still has a hard time trying to initiate a conversation. The words piling up in his throat—stuck there for the rest of eternity.
 König doesn’t know what to do with his hands, resisting the strong urge to grab yours—so tiny and adorable­—and let his giant hand envelope it. You are pouting, gaze averted to the ground, cheek rosy from embarrassment, probably reprimanding yourself that you should’ve known better.
König isn’t sure if he wants you to be scared of him or not – and he hates that you are the first one to be an exception to his desires, because he wanted everyone to fear him. There is something dark, disgustingly predatory almost, in his thoughts as he watched you beat yourself up, but he doesn’t speak, and his fists are balled up because your voice and adorable face were too fucking much and he doesn’t even know how to talk to a girl in his adult years.
“C-colonel, we’re here.”
You hate that you stutter, but you can’t help it since your heart skipped a beat when you looked up and saw König looking at you with such softness and tenderness from his gigantic height. You had to take a deep breath, shaking your head at the delusion it’s not a delusion, you aren’t seeing things runnin in your head.
No.
That was wrong. That idea in itself would be wrong. The colonel was someone wise despite his violent tendencies. He would never entertain the idea of being with a fellow soldier. Not to mention bend the rules just to risk his position and rank. It would be stupid for him. It wouldn’t be worth it for him, and you just fucking know it.
“Ah… right. Bitte, wait a minute.”
You can see how miniscule the keys are to his hand, his form bending down a little and when he stood back up, he was at least three inches taller than the fucking doorway. He turns the lights on and gestures for you to step in. He closed the door behind you as you took a seat in one of the chairs in front of his gigantic desk.
The desk looked proportionate to his form, and the office chair he has accommodates him greatly and it makes your heart flutter because he looks like a king and all he had to do was give out his decree, and you would be scrambling to do said decree to please him because holy shit something about how big he is, is making your insides churn deliciously–
Wait. Bitch, you better stop. Your thoughts screeched to halt, smacking yourself internally because you’re sure you’re not yet in your ovulation week because you just finished your period four days prior… No, that’s not true, you lost track of your cycle due to the recent events that happened at base. The colonel was twiceyour size, and you’re not sure if you can take him.
Not in a fight, of course.
“So, about the recent events happening here at base, I’m sure you’re well aware of it by now.” König starts, leaning at the desk. “Soldiers are disappearing left and right, the younger ones wouldn’t take long before they stop buying our lies, and we need a way to stop whoever it is that is picking is off and making us drop like flies.”
He stopped, eyes roaming as if he’s analysing you.
“Hase, you are quite the prodigy that at such a young age you’ve managed to achieve the rank of lieutenant, and I am completely impressed.” König says, nodding to himself as if he’s proud of you. “Someone of your calibre would be of valuable help to catch the culprit or, rather, the creature that’s currently on the loose in base and hunting us one by one.”
“Creature? Don’t you mean person?”
“I’d like you to look at these and tell me that a human was behind these incidents.”
König slides you a dossier and you merely throw a confused glance at him before opening said dossier, and you almost–No. You do regret opening the fucking folder.
The entrails of the victims are chewed off and sprawled across the floor, the ground was a sea of blood. Some of them had missing parts, but mostly the torso was empty, intestines being the only thing left behind from the inside of the corpses, and there were a few where the eyes hangs out of its socket and runs down their faces like a veiny egg yolk. You want to look away, but you can’t. Some pictures showed the skins have been peeled off, most had been cleanly peeled off. Even the nipples were intact. Never to this day have you seen anything so horrible.
Finally, the urge to puke tore your attention away from the files, smacking it to the table as you swivelled your head away, and your mouth unhinged as the familiar disgusting liquid of your insides went past your throat. Before any of it could spill past your lips, a bucket had been shoved to catch it. König holds the bucket to your mouth. Meanwhile, you did nothing but vomit. Over and over again. Long after it seemed there was nothing more to bring up, you continued to vomit.
At last, after a good solid minute, you stopped. Tears prickled your face as puke-mixed snot went down your throat. König was kind enough to offer you tissues to help clean yourself up before he hands you a glass of water, and getting rid of your vomit.
“I’m sorry.” You weakly said. “That caught me off guard and I–” The words cut off in your thought as you shuddered as the pictures seared into your head. Well, guess this is my thirteenth reason.
“It’s fine, Schatz. Nothing to be sorry about. It is rare for someone to stomach such evidence.” He reassures you.
His giant hand rubs soothing circles on your back and it’s so comforting that you eventually calm down and catch your breath. The taste of bile still lingers and you downed glass after glass of water just to get rid of it but seemingly failing to do so. Yet it is nothing compared to the electrifying touch of König’s fingers that glide behind your back, passing by the wing ang hooks of your bra. Of course, he didn’t mean to do that he most definitely did intendes to do that because he was just trying to ease you out of your sickened state.
“I’m sorry.” You say again.
The pout on your lips was making you adorable and König was glad he was the way that he was right now. Had he been the same age as you, he wouldn’t have been able to hold back. He would’ve pushed you down on his desk, giant hands spreading your legs, tearing your clothes, while he makes you beg for his cock–
“As I’ve said before, Schatz. It’s fine. We have to recompose ourselves from time to time. After all, we’re only human, no?”
You look up at him from where you seat, smiling softly at him. He was so nice. Your eyes flickered to his neck, and then on to his fingers. Seeing the lack of wedding band on him had you feeling butterflies. Was he not married? Who wouldn’t want to marry him? Was he ugly?
His baby blue eyes—like a mixture of storm grey skies and the heartless depths of the ocean—were a soft hint to the fact that he was handsome. You just know. Unconsciously licking your lips, your eyes scanned him over – in the most shameless manner, but that was fine. You can always chuck it up to you just analysing him.
“Now, Schatz.” His fingers wrapped around you chin, coaxing you gently to look up at him. “Lieutenant colonel Allard, Captain O’Neil, and I will be conducting a manhunt starting at 00:00 up until to 04:30 this Friday. Allard would be taking the North side of the base, I’ll be taking the South, and O’Neil would be taking the West area–”
You paid attention to every word he said, nodding your head every now and then. You kept your eyes locked to his, unaware of the growing tent inches away from your face in your colonel’s pants.
“–which is why I called you to my office.” His voice rips you out of your trance. “I wanted to ask you if you would be willing to lend out a hand in catching whatever it was that’s picking us off one by one?”
“Yes, sir.”
The way you responded with such speed had you internally clutching your pearls. You were so confused as to why you had agreed so easily without even asking for the details. Hopefully, your colonel would be kind enough to graciously brief you and the team before he sends you all out to play limbo with this culprit.
König smiles at your eagerness to help the team—to help him. The younger ones weren’t so eager like you; often having to be bribed with a reward just to help. But you? You said yes without any hesitation.
“Are you married, Schatz?”
“No, sir.”
“How come? Most female or male soldiers your age are married. Why aren’t you?”
“Why aren’t you?”
Your body tensed as your mind caught up with that loose mouth of yours, but before you could even stop yourself the words had already been uttered into the world.  Holding your tongue and making you blurt this in front of your superior needs to be fired. Like, bro, pick a different sim to fuck up. Please. You might’ve had the chance to be in his good graces, being offered promotion after promotion because König did say he’s read your files – he’s awfully touchy too, but maybe that’s because he’s comfortable around you. You might’ve had a chance of walking out the office, alive and healthy with nothing but a nod of a head and telling you to be prepared for the operation this upcoming Friday – but now you’ve said those words with such casualness that it doesn’t really suit the dynamic between you two, and could promptly land you to some punishments. You could–
The colonel chuckles, eyes closed as his shoulder’s shook, and the sound of it makes your cheeks flare with warmth.
“What gave it away, Schatz?”
Your body relaxed, seeing he wasn’t offended or irritated by your response.
“It’s uh… um, the lack of wedding ring, sir.”
“Oh? What an observant klein leutnantin.”
He looks at you, contemplating for a moment before König spoke.
“I have trouble finding a… suitable mate, if you will. Mutter often tells me that I’m a carbon copy of my father, which could explain why she’s so distant and hostile towards me. I don’t… I don’t know or saw the need to find a partner until… until recently.”
His gaze lands on you as he said the last two words. You furrowed your brows, wondering who or what could’ve changed his mind. With a tilt of your head to the side, you asked him a question that stems from his words.
“How come your mother hated you just because you looked like your father? You can’t exactly control your looks.”
“Because he was a monster who had forced himself on her, and forced her to carry his child – which would be me.”
Your eyes widened at that. You didn’t exactly expect the colonel to say it so casually, as if it’s a fun fact you’re telling to a kindergarten. You pursed your lips, looking away, feeling awkward and bad now that you had brought up the topic.
“I’m sorry… I… I didn’t… know.” Was all you can muster.
“You seem to not know anything at all, Schatz.” He cooed at you. “It’s alright. You needn’t be sorry. How I was born is something I cannot control, but the outcome of who I can be is.”
König chuckles, walking over to pat your head affectionately and holy shit it has your heart racing.
“Growing up, the children my age shunned me. They had thrown rocks at me, calling me a monster. My mother did nothing to comfort me, dismissing me and shoving a sack to cover my face. I spent most times outside the house, often sleeping on caves by the waters or at the sand by the shore. The lake is something comforting, I must say… I miss it – yearn for it, if you will."
“Lake? Don’t you mean ocean?”
“My hometown was in Hallstatt Lake, Austria.”
His words ring a bell. You could’ve sworn you’ve heard of Hallstatt Lake before. You tried to remember where you heard it, but couldn’t. Oh, well. If I can’t remember it, then it ain’t that important.
 My father travelled from the ocean and dwelled by the lakes of that area. Then he saw mein mutter and... you know how that story went. Anyways, I have learned that I am… hideous. Therefore, that is one of the contributes as to why I am still, in your kind’s terms, single.”
“So you’ve never had partners before? Not even… I dunno… doing the devil’s tango? Sex?”
He laughs, shaking his head. “No, Schatz. They back out the last minute.”
You looked at him pitifully. He was a lonely man, wanting to have someone beside him and yet his self-esteem was so low. Maybe fucking him could boost his self-esteem. It’s not like I’m craving him, I’m simply helping. Maybe I could be the first to teach him the intimate touch of a woman. The comforts of the flesh. There was something about damaged men that are just so fucking hot. After all, it’s just a twenty-three years old age gap between König and I – Woah, what?! Pause. Your thoughts screeched to a halt, pinching yourself for letting it wander off that far.
How did it get to this?
How did the two of you get so comfortable to the point he’s literally just trauma dumping on you, and you’re lending an ear to listen. You should be walking out f the door, telling him this was unprofessional but you find yourself glued to the chair, heart going out to König as you empathize with him.
“I may not know what you look like under the mask, but mom did tell me that you can see if a person has a handsome or beautiful face is by looking at the shape of their eyes.”
“Oh? And what have you deduced from just observing my eyes, Schatz? Am I considered monstrous?”
“No, sir… I’d say you’re beautiful.”
König’s eyes widened at your words, his cheeks burning beneath the mask and he’s so fucking thankful that you can’t see his face or what he looks like underneath. His heart thumps louder than it did when he first saw you.
He is fighting the urge to invite you to move in with him to his quarters, keeping you all to himself. König’s sure that his bedroom is way more spacious and comfier than that of a lieutenant’s. The Austrian giant has to physically restrain himself from snatching you, and dragging you into the shadows with him where no one can rip you from his embrace – he can’t bear thinking about you being with someone else.
“Was it offensive… sir?”
“No, liebling. I just think you are blind.”
König would absolutely whisk you away right now. All you need to do was say the word, and he’d be following your words as if they are the ten commandments. He can and will buy you an estate if you want, just pick a place—preferably in Hallstatt, Austria—and that would be easy for him. König would love to just provide for you, to get to go home to someone as adorable and meek as you are – eager to succeed and be praised by the most little of things. You would be protected there. No one would ever disturb you.
His father was never there for his mother. Left nothing to support her other than trauma after he was hunted down by the townsfolk and brutally murdered. König tells himself that he would be different, that he would give you the world. You need only ask. 
He understands that being delusional isn’t healthy, and that his psychiatrist would definitely shoot him with a Nerf gun for letting himself descend into this type of madness, but he was old.
And lonely.
And you’re just so sweet and so nice to him, going so far as to tell him he’s beautiful. And despite spending too much time in waters, König drowns himself in fantasies about you being in a giant house, welcoming him home after his deployment, pregnant and eager to kiss him sweetly. You who can be his everything. A cure for his troubles and woes, even though his psychiatrist had severely advised him to not put your partner on high pedestals because it is extremely unhealthy and co-dependent.
König knows he can’t just blurt shit out as he pleases, lest he scares you away. You would scream at him, call him a sociopath – or a psychopath if you aren’t as knowledgeable as him in the department of terms. He is only self-aware enough to know that he can lose you if he made one wrong move.          
He’s old and tired. And he wants to experience fatherhood before he dies, preferably having you as his klein Frau. But he can’t rush you. He needs to bid his time. In that moment, König decided—regretfully so—to let you go back to your duties for the day.
He needed to get close to you than he ever did before—needed to work with you to have you close to him at all times.
“That would be all, liebling.” König says to you. “You are free to go now. I don’t really want to hold you up here for too long.”
“It’s an honour to be picked by you, colonel.” You chirp happily, eager to maintain this casualness between you two in hopes of getting promoted faster.
The giant, behemoth of a man watches you walk away from him, eyes glued to your hips and adorable, plump ass. Your frame still smaller than him even when you stood up to your full height. It was endearing to him. Soft blue eyes following your every move, watching you as you give him one last smile and a friendly wave before you closed the door shut behind you.
“I’d say you’re beautiful.”
Your words echoed in his head, making the older being flustered as he ran his hands over his face and sighed. He couldn’t get it out of his mind, and he knew he’d be clinging to that until the day he died.
“It shall be the day that the sun is at its peak when you find what you longingly desire. Once the sky is thick with water and the blood of warriors are spilled, the gods will give you a chance to converse with this creature. You should turn them away. Put them at arms-length, but you are a selfish being. You would devour them, drain them until they are merely husks because of your depravities… I pity this young girl.”
He recalls the stupid reading he had gotten from a so-called ‘wise woman’ twelve years ago in her quaint house at Wolfengasse street. Maybe that völva was genuine in her craft before she left Austria.
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wysteria-bloom · 9 months ago
Text
▨ "i just wanted a taste..."
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JJK characters taste your flavoured lipbalm
Genre : sfw, tooth-rotting fluff
Warnings : slightly suggestive i guess? Geto is Geto - not Kenjaku for obvious reasons :)
A/n : taking requests! You can read my profile description for rules
Characters : gojo, geto, shoko, nanami
⟢ gojo satoru ␥
Humming as you applied your lip balm, you looked over your shoulder at your boyfriend," Satoru, 'm leaving now." You murmured walking over to him.
Gojo grins when he hears you, reaching out to grab you just as you’re passing by. “Not so fast,” he says, his voice playful. He moves to kiss you, but stops as he sees something on your lips. “Hm?” he says, glancing down.
He looks back up at you, his lips still inches from your face.
You know just how to make his curiosity peak.
You raised a brow at him in confusion,"... what?" You deadpanned up at him," You look dumb."
“You’ve got something on your lips,” he says, running the tip of his finger along your bottom lip curiously, “What is it?”
"Flavoured lip balm... why?"
Gojo laughs when you tell him this. "Lip balm, huh?" he says, sounding just a bit suspicious. "Hm... You know, I think I need a taste test."
He reaches up to lean in and kiss you, but stops when he's an inch away from your lips. His eyes gleam with a hint of mischief. "Gotta see if you're speaking the truth. Don't want a liar for a partner, now do I?"
You let out a tired sigh," there's no need for the dramatics. If you're gonna kiss me then just do it." You rolled your eyes.
"Okay, okay," Gojo says, taking your chin in a gentle hand and then leaning in to kiss you. He presses his lips to yours, his fingers moving to wrap gently around your neck. The taste of the lip balm and his own mouth collide over your lips, the flavors surprisingly good together. His tongue darts in at the last second to run along your mouth, tracing along the outer edge of your lips with a playful, teasing feel.
You pull away with a groan," You're gonna lick it all off!"
Gojo breaks into a fit of laughter, then smiles. "Don't complain," he says. "I'm not going to stop until you tell me what flavor it is."
His hands cup your face, his fingers brushing your cheeks as he stares down into your eyes. "Hmm... raspberry?"
"You... could just keep guessing until you get it right?" You prompted, looking off the the side inconspicuously.
"True..." Gojo says, his tone thoughtful and then leaned down to kiss you again, "Blueberry? Blueberry pancake? Grape? Strawberry?" With each incorrect guess he dove in for another kiss.
He continues off in a steady stream, sounding more and more unsure as he goes. After a bit, he pauses, then grins, as if a new thought has hit him. "Wait... it's watermelon."
"Ding ding." You droned out lazily and then huffed," Jeez... I don't even have any on my lips anymore. It's not healthy to eat lip balm, y'know?" You grumbled out grouchily.
Gojo laughs. "I know, I know," he says. "I just wanted a taste..."
⟢ geto suguru ␥
"Babe, do you have any lip balm?" Suguru hummed out as he walked into the kitchen, tapping his lips cutely with that little smile of content on them," My lips are kind of dry..."
You turned around to face him and nodded," Yeah, I've got some on now. It's flavoured~"
"Flavoured? What flavor is it?" Geto was curious and walked towards you. He looked at your lips, intrigued by what he saw.
Geto suddenly leaned forward and gently kissed your lips.
"Mph!" your breath hitched in your throat by his sudden kiss but leaned into it almost immediately, your lips molding together.
The kiss made Geto's body heat up. As he stepped back slightly, he noticed the flavor of lip balm on his lips. Now he definitely knew it was strawberry flavored.
Geto's voice was as rough as always, but now there was a hint of something else, "You taste like strawberry..." His head tilted to the side in an innocent manner, but he was far from innocent.
"Y-yeah... your favourite." You stuttered out, blinking up at him before chuckling," I guess that's one way to get some lip balm."
He smiled down at you when he heard you chuckle and raised a teasing brow," I dunno... think I need a little more~" He cooed out gently as he pressed you into the kitchen counter, large hands settling on your waist comfortably.
His fingers gently grasped your waist as he pulled you closer once again. He brought his lips down on yours for another intimate and passionate kiss. The feeling of your body pressed against him was enough to drive him mad. Geto's eyes were shut and he enjoyed every second of it.
As the kiss broke off, he panted, "(name)..."
"You're... gonna end up kissing all of the lip balm off.." you mumbled out with a pout on your now glossy and plump lips.
"But it tastes so good." Geto licked his lips, taking in the scent of strawberry. "I want more... lots more." He was now leaning down to kiss you again.
For a second... the disgusting taste of curses were forgotten thanks to your sweet kiss.
⟢ ieiri shoko ␥
"Bleh... my mouth tastes gross." Shoko grouched out with a frown on her lips.
You snickered at her as she leaned onto your body lazily, head resting on your shoulder," That's typically what smoking cigarettes does, hun." You teased out.
"Shut up," she replies, but there's a smile on her face, and she seems to be leaning in for a kiss. The cigarette dangles from between her fingers, and if you get too comfortable, she might just have to ash it on your shirt.
"Leaning in for a kiss, how bold of you..." you hummed out, but you weren't bothered in the slightest as your eyes watched her lips closely with want.
"Who said anything about boldness?" Shoko asks, her voice soft. Her long fingers reach up to cup your cheek, the cigarette dangling between her fingers lazily. Her eyes hold yours for a few moments before she leans in for a kiss. As always, it's slow and deep, and she takes her time with you, letting it linger for as long possible. When she finally pulls away, she's got a small smile on her face.
She ran her tongue along her lips which now had your lip balm on it," Mm... tastes like chocolate." She hummed out lazily.
Your fingers gripped onto her hips gently, running them up and down soothingly as you smiled cheerfully at her," you like?" You wiggled your brows suggestively.
She chuckled," Yeah, I like," she smiled out," didn't know I was a sucker for flavoured lip-balm..."
"Definitely beats the taste of cigarettes, huh?"
"Certainly..." She leaned down again, lips pulled into a smirk," or maybe its your lips that are influencing me..."
"Huh... funny how things work like that, eh?"
"I'm not sure what tastes better..." Shoko chuckles, then shrugs. "If I'm going to be honest, I think I do like the taste of cigarettes."
"But... it's certainly an acquired taste," she continues, her tone shifting to a playful one now. As she leans down again, Shoko's eyes flicker to your lips and then to your eyes.
"But... you've made me curious about other flavours of lipbalm.. I think we need to try more."
And then she's kissing you again, deep and passionate.
Humming into the kiss, you shut your eyes and pulled her closer to you by the waist until she was halfway on your lap.
Shoko meets your kiss enthusiastically, her hands running through your hair, tugging gently. You can feel Shoko's heart racing against your chest, and her grip on you is tight and needy. She's not thinking, she's just following the feelings coursing through her body.
The taste and smell of the cigarette in her fingers is quickly forgotten as she just wants to lose herself in this moment. Even if there was now a permanent burn mark left on your sofa.
⟢ nanami kento ␥
A tired sigh fell from Nanami's lips as he walked into his home, taking off his shoes at the front door in exhaustion.
When walking into the house, he was greeted by the mouth-watering smell of food cooking.
"I'm home." He called out lazily to his partner, setting his briefcase aside.
"In the kitchen!" Your voice called back.
The tired man walked to the kitchen, setting his goggles aside to get a good look at his partner when his eyes first land on them but he was surprised when a blob of (hair colour) ran into his chest the second he stepped to the kitchen.
A soft groan escapes his lips as you run up to embrace him with excitement. He brings a hand up and rubs your back lovingly in return, burying his head in the crook of your neck.
“You know I don’t like you putting in too much effort for me when I come home, (name).” He looks at you with mild disappointment in his eyes, yet his voice is soft and calm, pressing a kiss to your neck.
You gigged lightly," Oh, are you saying you don't want dinner then~?" You teased out lightly with a gentle smile pulled onto your lips.
"Oi... don't get bratty." Nanami replies with a grumble, a smile of amusement threatening to twitch onto his lips, and he makes his way from your neck to kiss your lips.
However, your flavoured lip gloss surprises him, and he pauses his kiss to look at you.
"Since when did you start using lip gloss?" He asks curiously, his expression softening slightly as his thumb prodded at your bottom lip gently.
"Since today." You hummed out, leaning into him more, clearly wanting a deeper kiss from him," Do you like it?"
A soft smile spreads across his lips as you lean into him, causing butterflies to flutter through his stomach.
"I like it a lot," He replies simply, his expression softening further as he wraps his arms around you and draws you closer," Tastes like apple."
He gently pulls you towards him and tilts his head slightly to the right before kissing you deeply on the lips, one hand placed against your cheek as he holds you close.
The kiss took hold of you, wrapping around you and filling you with warmth.
Nanami's presence usually did this. The comfort and safety he provided was addicting.
As the kiss continues, Nanami's grip around you tightens, and he runs his fingers through your hair with his free hand. His lips part slightly, and his tongue presses against yours, his breathing quickening as he becomes immersed in the taste and sensation of your lips.
His eyes remain closed as he continues to savor every bit of your mouth, gently pulling you closer until your foreheads are touching and your bodies are pressed tightly together.
The kiss leaves you breathless as he pulls away moments later. Nanami's soft expression and his warm embrace causes some of the tension in you to melt away, and you notice that he's still holding on to you tightly, as if he's afraid you would disappear.
"You're addicting, (name)," he whispers quietly, his gaze locked onto yours.
"Hm... if I had known my lipbalm would affect you this much, I would have worn it sooner~" you giggled out, arms wrapping around his neck so you could pull him downwards and press kisses to his cheeks and nose.
"Oh please, you know very well that I don't need much to be swayed by you," Nanami chuckles quietly, his arms still wrapped around you as you pull him down and continue to shower him in affection.
His voice becomes slightly muffled as he buries himself into you, his body pressed against yours as he holds you close.
"Just you is enough for me..."
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lareynaderucorazon · 6 months ago
Text
Sol x Reader, long post, Minors DNI
"I'm home"
You call out as you take off your shoes. Not even a moment later Sol greets you with a kiss.
"Hi babe, how was your day?"
"Mm nothing special. How was work?"
"Ugh don't even get me started. This new hire, Kevin." You rolled your eyes at the thought of that man.
"But I'm home here with you now so all of that doesn't matter." You put your shoes up and follow your wife into the kitchen.
"Endonde esta Sebastian?"
"He's upstairs finishing his homework."
"Hmm my baby's so studious."
Sol stands over the stove in his frilly green apron. You hug him from behind and peek over his shoulder.
"What gourmet dish did you cook up for us today?"
"Well you've been craving shrimp pasta so I made shrimp fettuccini and some garlic toast."
"So that was the heavenly smell I smelled as soon ans I walked through the door."
Sol slightly blushed. He knew he was married to the love of his life for seven years now but he still couldn't get over how she complemented his cooking. He felt a little embarrassed being put on the spot but, nonetheless, pride swelled in his heart at how he's able to take care of his wife.
"Dinner's ready."
"I'll go get Sebastian."
You walked away but not before you slyly groped his ass cheek. Sol's face turned red and he covered his ass with his hands before turning to softly glare at you. You only sent him a kiss before laughing and walking away.
As you walked up the stairs you could hear faint piano music coming from your son's room. You knocked and waited for him to say come in before you opened the door.
Your son looked up at you, tearing his attention away from his homework.
"Oh hey mom, when did you get back from work?"
"Just right now. I came to get you for dinner, dad made pasta."
"I'll be right there, I'm just trying to finish this last question but I can't get past it."
"Oh what class is it for?"
"Spanish."
"Hm let me see it."
Question: Maria compro ocho frutas. Tres naranjas, dos pinas, una sandia, y dos manzanas. Cada naranja cuesta veinte y ocho pesos y cuarenta y uno centavos. Cada pina cuesta cincuenta pesos y setenta y tres centavos. Una sandia cuesta sesenta y nueve pesos y ochenta y cinco centavos. Cada manzana cuesta veinte y tres pesos y sesenta y ocho centavos. Cuanto pago Maria en dollares?
"Ok wow, that's a lot of information."
"I know right."
"Ok so lets break it down in English first. The problem say, follow along with me, Maria bought 8 fruits. Write down the numbers on top of the words so you can visualize it better. Ok, she bought 3 oranges, 2 pineapples, one watermelon, and 2 apples. Each orange costs 28 pesos and 41 cents, Each pineapple costs 50 pesos and 73 cents. One watermelon costs 79 pesos and 85 cents. Each apple costs 23 pesos and 78 cents. Did you get all that?"
"Yeah."
"Is it easier to see all the numbers written down?"
"A lot easier."
"Now remember its asking for the total in dollars and they gave us the amounts is pesos. So add all of the numbers up and then we are gonna convert the total amount into dollars."
"But how are we going to do that if the teacher didn't give us the conversion rate?"
"The internet my son. What's the total amount?"
"314.1 pesos"
"Now, looking it up on yoogle, you get 1 dollar per every 16.91 pesos. So, you divide the total amount by 16.91 and then you get your answer, which is?"
"18.6 dollars!"
"That's my boy, now let's go down and eat dinner before it gets cold."
You and your son head down to the dinner table where your husband was patiently waiting for you to.
"What took so long?"
"Homework." You and your son said simultaneously. You both laughed before all three of you started to dig in.
🤎timeskip cuz im lazy + smut🤎
Your husband was now washing the dishes as you boxed up the leftovers for your lunch tomorrow. As soon you as you were done with that you were right back onto clinging to your husband. You started trailing kisses up and down his neck, leaving hickies in certain areas. Sol started to groan as you were caressing his hips, occasionally trailing over his hard on before going under his shirt to play with his nipples.
"Mmf."
You leaned into his ear while groping his bulge.
"Shh baby."
"Wha-haa. What abous Sebastian?"
"Taking a shower. Now let me take care of my sexy husband."
You decided you were done with the teasing, so your hands finally found their way under Sol's waistband and at the base of his cock.
"Hm? What's this? Basketball shorts and no draws? You wanted this to happen didn't you? You were fantasizing about this all day weren't you?"
You teased your husband, both with your words and with your hands, slowly traversing up and down his length while occasionally flicking his head.
"Tha-hah. That's not... true."
"It's not? You don't want this? Should I stop?"
"No! No please keep going." Sol could feel you smirk against his shoulder which caused shivers to run down his spine.
"That's my pretty husband. Look at your pretty pink cock in your wife's hands. You love this don't you?"
"Yess!"
"Sh!" You tugged on his dick a little harsher which caused him to bend over and for him to almost drop a plate.
You heard the water turn off upstairs so you knew you had to finish him off quick. You let go of Sol's dick which caused him to whine. You grabbed his hips before harshly turning him around and getting on your knees. Sol's breath hitched in his throat when he felt your warm wet mouth take him all in. He gripped onto the sink as you practically sucked the soul out of him.
"Y/nn. Fuck."
You knew he was about to come so you quickened your pace and started fondling his balls.
Sol's release came quick and powerfully. His eyes rolled to the back of his head while his body involuntarily jerked itself further into his wife's mouth. His hips sputtered for a few seconds before they eventually stopped.
Sol's body fell flaccid against the counter, so you picked up his shorts and gave him a kiss.
"Thanks for desert honey. Why don't you go get ready for bed while I finish up the rest of these dishes."
Sol could only nod and wobble away, the high still heavily weighing on his mind.
Finishing the dishes only took 10 minutes, and once you were done you walked up to your son's room to wish him goodnight. He looked around, trying to spot Sol.
"Where's dad?"
"Oh, he went to bed early. He was really tired today."
"Hm ok. Goodnight mom."
"Goodnight sweetie."
You turned off his lights and left your son's room. You walked down to the opposite end of the hallway to enter your room where you found Sol laying on the bed, staring up into the ceiling. He greeted you with a warm smile and love filled eyes. You smirked while closing and locking the door. You stripped out of your clothes and you could see excitement spark into your husband's eyes.
"Ready for round two?"
Sol belongs to @fantasia-kitt
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dragonridernoobie · 3 months ago
Note
Hello
Pls, Starscream and Shockwave x pregnant!reader who is nervous during pregnancy, as she worries about herself and the child and needs support and comfort
And they're nervous because they don't know how to handle a pregnant reader and a baby.
They're all on pins and needles...
I don't know if you mean human or cybertronian, so I'm gonna do human (since it is more chaotic) so, I hope you enjoy and thank you for being Paitent while I did this! <3 (also, I don't know shit about pregnancy, so I tried my best XDDD)
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Starscream X PregnateReader X Shocwave
Shockwave
(Y/N) woke up with an upset stomach. They just thought it was the milkshake they drank last night, making their way up.
Sadly though, throughout the day, they kept stopping at the bathroom, heaving and throwing up nothing.
They knew something was wrong. They took some medicine and went to their lover for help.
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When he saw the baby in the halofrom, (Y/N) saw something no one had ever seen
(Y/N) went to talk to shockwave that they where sick but Shockwave said they where not.
They did not have a fever or was bleeding.
Que, (Y/N) taking him to the hospital with them to get get checked up.
When the doctor said they where pregnant, they where surpised.
The doctor then pulled out the ultra sound.
He crashed like he was not reacting to (Y/N) or the doctor talking
(Y/N) pinch his arm, and he does not react
When he finally came back to earth, he asked the doctor how this was even possible.
Once he calms down and accepted that he is now gonna have a sparkling, he is actually is quite excited
The doctor was confused since he dosent know Shockwave was a cybertronian and a haloform.
(Y/N) gotta drag him out of the hospital and help him calm down.
In his own unique way.
First 3 months
In the first 3 months, I think he would spend this time looking up human pregnancy's.
He would look up what to expect with the pregnancy, what to buy for (Y/N), what they should eat, Etc.
He would also make inventions that would help (Y/N) when and to check on the baby.
He would spend as much time with (Y/N) when he is not working for megatron.
6 months
God, save this man.
He is having trouble understanding (Y/N)s food cravings.
Like, he would wake up in the middle of the night after resting to just find (Y/N) eating pickles with whipped cream.
He would not question (Y/N) since it'd so co fusing that not even (Y/N) knows.
He is also getting tierd of (Y/N)s food cravings since there where times where he woke up in the middle of the night, (Y/N) trying to wake him.
They always asked for the most random things to.
Like, sardines, spam, watermelon, cookies, sprite, anything really.
Poor Shockwave.
9 months
Shockwave is on edge.
He is actally scared to talk to (Y/N) since they also snap and are emotional.
He knew this would happened since he read about it early on.
It stills scares him though, since he dosent want to deal with an angry (Y/N)
He would also be on high alert about (Y/N) since they can give birth at any second.
They would not leave them alone.
When (Y/N)s water finally breaks, you get to see the rare, rare, rare sight of Shockwave panicking
Have fun XD
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Starscream
Starscream was confused when (Y/N) came to him, complaining about how they felt sick.
Starscream would look at (Y/N) from head to toe before saying bluntly they look fine.
(Y/N) new not to argue with Starscream since it would be a lost cause.
I think starscream would agree that something is wrong if he saw (Y/N) throwing up.
When he took them to the hospital for help, he and (Y/N) where shocked when the doctor congrats them for the upcoming child.
Ya, starscream is scared.
He dosent know what to do
What do you mean it will come out of you're Pussy?!?!
Ya, help him.
3 months
In the first 3 months, (Y/N) would have to look up how to prepare for the future baby.
Starscream was trying his best to control his anger issues since he actally wants a sparkling.
So, the first 3 months is starscream controlling his anger issues, (Y/N) looking up how to raise a child, and starscream also trying to get megatron to let starscream have more time with (Y/N)
Surprisingly, megatron allows it but asked for starscream to do more work on the warship.
6 months
Dude, DUDE!
Starscream is panicking.
He dosent understand how (Y/N) can eat so many things and never get full.
He swears, he just saw (Y/N) eat a full jar of pickles, a hole bag of chips, and hole box of oreos and they are still hungry???
Ya, he dosent understand what's happening.
At lest he is treating (Y/N) like a queen.
Willing to go to the store in the middle of the night to get a Cantaloupe.
He is rubbing (Y/N)s feet, rubbing her back, and making sure they are filled on snacks.
9 months
Starscream is scared.
He is not gonna walk anywhere near (Y/N) unless they needed something.
He knows (Y/N) is a ticking time bomb with their emotions.
So, que him keeping his distance but also right next to them incase they drop somtbing or need help.
When (Y/N)s water broke, starscream was actually disgusted to go near (Y/N)
Why are you leaking water????
Wait, the baby is coming now?!??!
At lest he flu you to the hospital
Ya, flue you. In a jet. To the hospital
........
At least the kid as a intresting birth story
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tarjapearce · 1 year ago
Note
I don't know if you ever answered this, but did Mama have weird cravings with the babies? I know my mama was always wanting watermelon slushies and shaved ice, or the occasional slice of lasagna and milk (both of which she hated before getting pregnant,how her dad realized she was pregnant) I like to imagine Miguel's confusion if she suddenly starts wanting something random before they know for sure each time she got pregnant
Hehehe 👀
The perfect time to introduce our 🌹
Pregnancies never ceased to amaze Miguel. Specially when it came to foods. You'd wake him up at deep in night hours to get you the most random things to eat.
When you were pregnant with Gabriella, you'd wake him up, crying cause you didn't have pickles, and you wanted pickles. He'd go to the closest convenient store, sleep still clinging to him as he brought you two jars of them.
To his horror, you'd dip the pickles in the sweet gooeyness of the Nutella jar and eat them with such contempt it made you cry out of happiness.
With Benjamin, it wasn't pickles with Nutella, but jalapeños and peanut butter. He'd had to hide the can of jalapeños from the fridge, partially cause he wasn't sure if it was good to eat that much of spiciness. But would end up giving them back cause you cried over them while calling him mean for hiding your food.
His suspicions of you being pregnant again just rose when he'd often find you at two am, scourging the fridge, eating mozzarella cheese sticks or any charcuterie cheese you had, smeared in dulce de leche.
It was endearing for him watching you eating the pieces with such delight that he'd secretly buy you good quality things when you were running out of them.
You'd cuddle him with a bottle of the sweet spread in one hand and the cheese stick in the other. Gabriella couldn't help but scrunch her nose in disgust at the combination.
---
The pregnancy test was irrelevant at this point. He just made an appointment with the doctor to check everything was okay.
"I want another girl."
His hand rubbed your lower belly, and kissed your cheek.
"What about twins?"
"Ay Jesus..."
He chuckled.
"Relax, whatever comes, I'll be happy. "
"Told you I was giving you a bunch of kids."
He nodded with a bashful smile.
"You did."
"This is our last baby though."
"Who knows" He smirked and you slapped his shoulder softly.
"Stop! You're not the one getting your belly expanding like a balloon!"
"I'm joking, cariño. Might get a vasectomy, though"
"I'll get my tubes tied up."
"You sure?"
You nodded at his question.
"Yeah. Three kids is more than enough"
"What if it's a girl?"
You snuggled against his chest as he caressed your hair.
" Her name will be Rosie. I love it, Gabi picked it actually."
"Rosita." He mumbled and chuckled, "I'm calling her Rosita Fresita" (Strawberry Shortcake)
"But what if it's a boy?"
"Leonardo?"
"Absolutely no."
"Emanuel?"
He snorted as you pouted "Not funny."
"Sorry, sorry. We'll come up with something"
You just giggled.
"If it's a girl Gabi will be over the moon."
---
Jessica
JESSICAAA
Jessi Jessi guess what?
Sorry, was busy. How's it going, hun?
🤰
...
For real? Like For real real?
Yup! Just came from the medical check
Girl... You and Miguel need a new hobby
Or a new tv
😂😂 Betch.
😘😘
It's gonna be a girl!!
SHUT UP
🥹❤️
😊
I'm so excited for you, Mama!
493 notes · View notes
7ndipity · 1 year ago
Text
Dating Namjoon headcanons
Warnings: swearing, suggestive, teeny bit of angst
A/N: I realized that I hadn't written anything for Joon in a hot minute, so let's change that, shall we?
Masterlist
Requests are open
°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•
Dating Namjoon feels like one of those early 2000s romance movies.
Utterly frustrating but soo worth it.
He talks a lot of hype in his songs, but I think when he first meets someone he's really into, he's a fucking mess.
Like it's Joon, but it's Joon, you know what I mean?
Red ears, stumbling over his words(and feet), getting flustered every other sentence.
Probably walked into a wall while distracted talking to you.
Don't get me wrong tho, once he gets the butterflies to chill and gets comfortable, the rizz is BACK and in full force.
Big on eye contact
Stares at you with absolute heart eyes(if you've seen that clip of him watching Hobi from Bon Voyage, you know what I'm talking about)
But can flip the switch in the blink of an eye, and be looking at you like he's gonna eat you alive(we love a duality king)
Simp Romantic. Will randomly bring you flowers just cause he was thinking about you(but he's always thinking about you, so why was today any different?)
Writes soo many songs/lyrics about you, but rarely tells you about them directly. He just asks if you wanna hear something he's been working on, and then sits back and watches your faves as you catch the hidden meanings and references. At the end, he's just sitting there, grinning, asking "You like it?"
(Like, yes, I like it you fucking dork!)
Always remember important dates like birthdays and anniversaries( first date, first kiss, everything)
Museum and bookstore dates are a given.
Buying/sharing books with you is probably one his favorite forms of intellectual intimacy, because, for him, each one is a glimpse into your mind.
If you mention one of your favorite titles and he hasn't read it, he's gonna find it asap.
Would try to get you to workout with him and be gym buddies.(I don't know if I like or hate that idea tho?)
Random texts at 1am asking if you're up and wanna hang out?(may or may not be outside your place already, cause he's over-eager and forgot to text earlier)
Endless, late night talks about everything from music to the meaning of life to what jelly bean flavor is superior(it's watermelon)
Also random trips together. Could be to the beach, could be to Sweden, who knows? You bring out his spontaneity and are one of the only people who can get him to take a vacation anyway.
He is a workaholic though, so you have to look out for him sometimes, make sure he eats, sleeps, touches grass, etc.
You probably bicker and butt heads a lot, but y'all make sure it never gets out of hand and try to find a solution.
(Lowkey possessive, but won't admit it)
Not a fan of pda, but he *clings*.
He tries to be subtle about it, but fails because it's like there's a gravitational pull between the two of you from the way he's constantly within arm's reach wherever you are.
Same goes for when you're alone. He's not technically cuddling you, but he always somehow ends up pressed to your side or back, or has a hand on you in some way.
Another member of the 'Protective Squad'. Like, if anyone so much as looks in your direction the wrong way, he's got the death glare locked on them.
Pretty classic when it comes to nicknames for you. Things like 'honey', 'baby', 'jagi'. Adds 'my' in front of any of them when he's in the mood to fluster you.
Which reminds me, he is the BIGGEST FUCKING TEASE ISTG.
He knows exactly what riles you up, and then just gives you these soft, sweet little kisses like you're not about to combust. Has the nerve to then smirk and call you needy(I wanna fight him)
Finds the most random things you do attractive. The way you read. The way you make your coffee. The weird little face you make when your flipping through Netflix.
Although he seems a bit cautious, I actually think a relationship with him might move pretty fast. Like, he's fighting back from asking you to move in with him after five or six months type of fast.
Lives for domesticity with you.
Quiet, sleepy mornings together. Messy hair and glasses over tired eyes, resting against your shoulder as he brings you coffee while you cook breakfast.
I know he said he's not sure abt kids anymore, but I do see him possibly getting a pet with you to 'round out the household'. Something quiet and low maintenance though, like a couple hermit crabs.(would probably name one after a favorite artist/author and then name the other smth random like 'blue')
Again, I don't know how to end these. Just love him, please.
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rottenpumpkin13 · 8 months ago
Text
Out Of Context Shit Heard On The SOLDIER Floor #6
Previous: #1, #2, #3, #4, #5
Angeal: No, Genesis, you spaghetti-noodle-spine-having-ass bitch.
Sephiroth: I identify as a tonberry *chases Cloud with a kitchen knife*
Zack: Ra Ra Rasputin *kicks Sephiroth over*
Genesis: Unhand me you cretin *alone, talking to no one*
Angeal: Zack just showed me a picture of the Grinch and said "hear me out"
Lazard: No, Sephiroth, you cannot have a human-sized cat bed in your office "for enrichment"
Cloud: Parkour time *crashes through the air vents*
Sephiroth: I'm the biggest lesbian ally in this department, actually.
Angeal: For the sake of my sanity I'm gonna pretend I didn't just see Zack twerking to One Winged Angel.
Luxiere: I would commit unspeakable atrocities for a crumb of Zack's attention.
Lazard: That stripper pole better be gone when I get back or so help me, Genesis, I will return you to the goddess.
Sephiroth: *does a single pump of sore throat spray* This is enough for sustenance for the day.
Kunsel: Care for a deep-fried cigarette?
Angeal: You look like an AI-generated twink.
Sephiroth: I've grown so tired of Genesis's voice that we now communicate solely through interpretive dance.
Lazard, over the speakers: Whoever heated fish in the break room microwave, please come by my office so I can break your knees.
Zack: Aww, I forgot to feed the Roomba :(
Genesis: I don't know why me and Angeal are being judged. Simulating a birth with a watermelon is a perfectly normal activity for two people.
Kunsel: Hopefully this office party won't end in accidental weed use.
Angeal: WHY IS THERE A FAMILY OF RACCOONS IN THE TRAINING ROOM?
Genesis: I noticed some homosexual subtext in your screams, do you want to talk about that?
Angeal: *sniff sniff* Ooh~ who's barbecuing? OH MY GOD IT'S AN ELECTRIC FIRE.
Roche: Every time I think about chopping my hair short I think "Sephiroth wouldn't want this for me" and the feeling is gone.
Genesis: I made a friend *drags in a skeleton with a Sephiroth wig*
Cloud: *points at Angeal, Genesis and Sephiroth* Pure of heart, dumb of ass, big of tit.
Lazard: I told Zack to use Excel and he started sobbing.
Angeal: WHAT DO YOU HAVE AGAINST SEASONING YOUR GROUND BEEF?
Sephiroth: It's extremely rude to ask someone why they're eating a salad bowl of udon at 8 AM. Mind your business, Zack.
Cloud: Genesis likes Loveless so much because the title resonates with his love life.
Zack: You keep your anxiety pills in a takeaway to-go box? Dude that's so fancy.
Lazard: Why is Sephiroth the only one wearing a shirt??
Angeal: Common sense has chased Zack all his life but he wears wheelies so he's faster
Sephiroth: I personally don't use the peace sign because I haven't had a day of peace since I was 12.
Kunsel: I'm never going out in public with Zack again. A child's balloon popped when it went near his hair.
Angeal: No I'm not giving you an aspirin. Last time I gave you one you crushed it and snorted it like cocaine.
Lazard: An overwhelming majority of you peaked in kindergarten.
Sephiroth: Zack, I'm becoming increasingly concerned by the amount of potatoes in your pants right now.
Zack: This year I want an A/B/O themed birthday party.
Sephiroth: Please don't commit tax fraud, Genesis. You won't thrive in prison.
Genesis: Does anyone have an extra ramen packet to give Sephiroth? The 64 he consumed this morning weren't enough.
Roche: Commander Rhapsodos and his emo fringe is our culture.
Zack: I'm at my fucking limit! I'm about to eat a vegetable!
Genesis: He's a son of a bitch Sephiroth: That implies he has a mother, so I don't see how that's an insult.
Zack: Fuck around and find out *said with a chunk of Genesis' red coat hanging from his pocket*
Cloud: Does anyone have an extra brain cell? I lost my remaining one when Genesis spoke to me this morning.
Sephiroth: Damn.
Kunsel: Zack owes me so much money that if he sold his box of random shit he stole from Angeal, he still couldn't pay me back.
Angeal: Why are you guys playing Queen's Blood in the closet? is this a metaphor?
Genesis: Have you prayed to your Sephiroth cardboard cutout yet today?
Sephiroth: Alert me once Rufus Shinra arrives so that I may greet him adequately *said while building a pipe bomb*
Lazard: It's all fun and games until the timeout cage that I ordered online arrives.
Genesis: I will atone for my sins by becoming a nuisance to the environment.
Cloud: If Zack were a scented candle he'd smell like ADHD and crayons.
Sephiroth, standing on a table: DO NOT. EAT. THE CHEESECAKE. IN THE FRIDGE. It's mine.
Angeal: *with a bucket while it's raining hale* Free ice baby.
Zack: I finally have enough gil to buy a sixteen bouncy castles.
Genesis: Being overcome with the desire to eat pasta and call your mother at 2 AM and wondering if you're having a mental breakdown or are possessed by Sephiroth.
Lazard: I can't fire any of you, but I'm about to start setting things on fire.
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coolyiooo · 1 year ago
Text
Using Dirty Pick Up Lines On BSD Men
Pairings: Dazai, Ranpo, Fyodor, Atsushi, and Chuuya
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❗Warnings❗slapping, kissing, blushing, dirty talk, teasing, and etc
🖤DAZAI🖤
You were bored as hell at the ADA office. You were figuring out what you should do to cure your boredom. Everybody was pretty much out of the office since they were busy with a mission.
You thought long and hard when suddenly a mischievous idea popped up in your pretty little head.
You looked at your boyfriend, who was sleeping on his desk when he should be working, and smirked. You got up and wrapped your arms around him, waking him up.
"Hm? Does my bella need something?" He asked with a tired smile
He then gasped and smirked with sparkling eyes "you wanna ditch work?"
You chuckled "as nice as that sounds, I'm going to have to decline. I'm sorry babe"
He pouted, but then you said "I just wanted to say something to you"
His face spoke curiosity "and what's that?" You leaned in his ear with a smirk and whispered
"Are you a racehorse? Because if I rode you you'll definitely finish first"You leaned back to see his face.
You saw that he was blushing with wide eyes. He was taken aback since he wasn't expecting you to use a dirty pick up line, but then he smirked and then smiled innocently.
He grabbed your chin gently and in a deep voice said "Are you a haunted house? Because I'm going to scream when I'm inside of you"
Your eyes widened a bit. You also blushed. You weren't expecting him to say a pick up line back to you, but little did you know that he wasn't done.
He chuckled "You can't spell menu with without m-e-n-u bc it's only us that will be on the table tonight"
Regardless of your dazed reaction he kept going "Can you do telekinesis? Because you made a part of me move without even touching it"
You finally found your words "D-Dazai-!"
He laughs and still continues to play this game of teasing you. What were you expecting? If your gonna tease him he's gonna play your game too, but he'll make sure to win.
He whispers in your ear again "Let's play titanic you'll be the iceberg and I'll go down"
Will this game ever end? You think as your face was a blushing mess
He kissed your cheek with a chuckle "I ran out of pick up lines so I'll pick u up at 9"
You then rolled your eyes with blushed cheeks. You were a little annoyed that he played your game better than you "ok we get it, you win with the pick up lines"
You slightly push him away, but he gets up and holds you by the waist, bringing your body towards his, looking directly into your eyes with a lazy look.
"Don't think I didn't mean everything I just said because I one hundred percent do. Just wait for tonight my Belladonna~"
💚RANPO💚
You and Ranpo went out to go get ice cream after solving an investigation. After getting your ice cream, you both went to sit down on a bench that showed a perfect view of the sunset, it was a gorgeous view and being with your cute boyfriend made it even better.
You were both sitting in silence just taking in the view and taste of the ice cream, but suddenly you remembered about this one pick up line that said something about sunsets. You smirked and thought 'why not tease my boyfriend?'
You leaned into Ranpo shoulder with a smirk "you know I'm not into watching sunsets, but I always love to see you go down"
Ranpo stopped eating his ice cream, his spoon still in his mouth, and looked at you with open eyes. His cheek had a hint of red on them. He processed what you just said and chuckled.
"I have a Quick question, sugar" he asked
You tilted your head out of curiosity "what is it?"
He had a smile on his face "If I were a watermelon would u spit or swallow my seed?"
You were now taken aback with a hint of blush, he laughed at your reaction "your such a cutie, sugar cube~ I think I actually know the answer to that question anyway"
You looked away from embarrassment, but after he stopped laughing he said something while standing up
"Now let's go home and have some alone time~" he smirks "Your like a rollercoaster the faster you go the louder I scream" when you did go home, he wasn't kidding about that last pick up line he said.
💜FYODOR💜
You were sitting on the couch while Fyodor was working on his computer. You were used to Fyodor taking hours to finish his work, but this time you were just so bored and you wanted some attention. You got up and went towards your boyfriend, hugging him from the side.
You groaned "Fedyaaaaa are you almost done?"
He didn't look away from the computer "I'm afraid not, my love .I'm sorry" he said apologetically, kissing your arms
You whined "I'm bored Fedya" you laid your head on his shoulder
He chuckled "if it'll help you can sit on my lap"
You didn't waste a second and straddled his lap while hugging him, your chin on his shoulder. He smiled at your action and continued to work. You were happy, but After awhile you started to get bored again and had an amazing idea.
You turned your head to get a better view of his face and mumbled with a smile
"This may sound corny, but your making me horny"
He stopped typing and gave u a side eye, this made you chuckle with a wide smile on your face. He turns his face to get a better look at you. His face showed no emotions.
He calmly said "Im not going to say a pick up line because I'm not trying to pick you up I'm trying to pin you down"
You whispered a gasp. Your mouth opened out of shock as he smiles and chuckles at your reaction. It's so nice to see him smile, it really warms your heart, so you decided to say one last line.
You smirked again "Are u a rainstorm? Because ur making me dripping wet"
He responded with a hum of amusement "As I should" you scoffed with a smile from his bold response.
He chuckled again then leaned into your ear "don't worry myshka~ tonight I'll make sure to make you satisfied"
💙ATSUSHI💙
You were with your precious boyfriend during lunch break at the ADA office, nobody else was eating with you guys so you had the whole office to yourselves.
You were feeling a bit of a tease today and decided to make your boyfriend a blushing mess by using dirty pick up lines.You looked at your boyfriend lovingly and innocently
"Atsushi~"
He looked at you and instantly knew you were up to no good "oh no.. what are you thinking about y/n?" He hesitantly asked
You scoffed. He knows you too well "nothing what do you mean?!"
"I know that look and that look means your up to no good"
"Oh come on it's not that bad"
"Hmm oh alright what is it?"You smirked making him just a little on edge
"Are you a bicycle? because I wanna ride you tonight"
He started to choke on his food with a red face. You couldn't tell if he was blushing or dying from choking. He stopped coughing after you slapped his back, trying to catch his breath.
"I- I thought you said it wasn't going to be that bad!" Atsushi whined
You smiled with a bit of a worried expression "I'm sorry my love it's just my doctor told me I have vitamin d deficiency, so I was wondering if you wanna go back to my place and help me out with that?"
This time he looked confused and concerned "r-really? What kind of foods have vitamin d in them? Maybe we should take walks so you can get more sun"
Ugh you love him so much. You laughed at his adorable innocence "Oh Atsushi.. bless your heart" you kissed his cheek
Now he was extremely confused. You smiled "I was trying to use another pick up line on you. When I said I had vitamin d deficiency I really meant.. well..." You then point at his crotch "get it?"
It took him awhile to figure it out. His face turned white and then became a red mess. You laughed at his cuteness and kissed his cheeks. He looked away with an embarrassed face and said
"Just wait until tonight, y/n"
🧡CHUUYA🧡
You and Chuuya just finished a mission and were on your way to your shared apartment. You were both walking on your way home, but you were trying to find a way to pass the time then suddenly you felt like messing with your boyfriend with some pick up lines.
"Hey, Chuuya" you called out to him
He turns his head towards you "hm? Yes, doll?"
You smirked "Are u a trampoline? Because I wanna jump up and down on you all the time"
He stopped walking which made you stop walking. You could see he had a blush painted on his cheeks while he looked at you with wide eyes.
You laughed at his reaction which made him embarrassed then slowly angry. He decided to get back at you. He grabbed you by the waist aggressively which made you stop laughing.
He smirks"Do you have a shovel? because I'm digging that ass" he then literally slaps your ass harshly making you yelp.
Thankfully not many people were on the streets, but it still made you embarrassed
"C-chuuya!" You yelled
He laughed at your embarrassment "what happened to your confidence, doll?" All you could do was pout and look away.
He then smiled at you "I was feeling very off today but then you turned me on, so take some responsibility will ya?"
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howlingday · 6 months ago
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Jaune: Can someone help me open this watermelon?
Nora: I got it! * Grabs it and puts it between her thighs. Squeezes thighs and cracks it open* Here you go! *Runs away*
Jaune:......... I'm still gonna eat it.
Ren: I will also eat it.
Pyrrha: And so will I!
Nora: Awesome~!
Blake: Were Team JNPR always this weird?
Yang: You're asking the wrong questions, Blake.
Weiss: And what question should we be asking?
Ruby: ...Is anyone else going to eat that watermelon?
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skz-bibi · 3 months ago
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🟥. !!: ° ... YOUTUBE : SKZ-LOG !! ‧ ₊˚
↺ ▪️ ࣪ ˖ ∿ 07.31.24 , skz-log for 2024 stayweek !
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OUTFIT FROM VIDEO ! ׁ ׅ ୨ ❪ bibis' masterlist! ❫ ୧ ⊹ ࣪
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"everyone." she held the camera in her hand. "today we are in milan , the i-days festival is a few days away but today we're here as tourists." she put the camera in jeongins face. "hello." he smiled into her camera. "why must you get so close?" she laughed , turning the camera back to her.
"who goes in what car?" seungmin asked. "apparently i'm in the black one." she pointed to the black one as well. "that one."
"sit in the middle." she pushed seungmin inside that back. "i'm taller." he argued. "barely." she said. "i'm older." she scoffed. "hierarchy doesn't work in this group , sit." she climbed in after he did , the boy turning to her with a glare. "love you."
"it's hot." she fanned herself as they tried to get the ac to turn on. "try that one." they all struggled until they got it right. "what about navigation , seulbi , don't you know italian?" hyunjin asked. "not enough to read that." she said. "oppa , you got this fighting!" she watched him fiddle around before they finally set off.
"what are you gonna buy at the fruit store?" seungmin asked. "watermelon." "flat peaches." were some of the answers. "strawberries if they have them." she said. "who wants lemons?" seungmin said. "lemons?" she was confused at the random request. "that's an insane thing to say." she said. "you eat just lemons?" jeongin asked from the front seat.
"they're good." she scrunched her nose up. "aren't they too sour?" he shook his head at her question. "you're a psychopath."
they finally opened the roof as they reached the toll booth; she took her sunglasses from her purse , also tying her hair back with a clip. "you've come prepared bibi?" she nodded. "can never be too sure."
they gathered the change from the toll booth; driving back off, out of the busy city of milan.
they eventually arrive at the fruit store; getting out of the car , the group entered the store. "what do we need to buy?" they all gathered the fruit they wanted , she looked around for the strawberries. "here they are." she picked them up, walking over to where the guys were picking a watermelon.
they gathered all the fruits they wanted; paying and then leaving the store back to the car.
they drove further , the pretty scenery of italy all around them. "it's like a painting." she gushed , taking it all in. "so pretty." they finally arrived at their destination , they met up with the other group at the villa.
jeongin grabbed a hold of her hand as they walked into the old villa. "look at this." her eyes lit up. "it's like a movie." she dragged the boy along with her and made their way inside and up to the roof.
on the way down they spotted a puppy that made them all go crazy. "ah , cute!" she bent down petting the dog. "he looks like an old man." she laughed scratching behind its ears. "you are adorable."
after their tour , they set out to buy food; walking a little way until they spotted a pizza shop. "we need to order pizza." lino said as they entered the store. "oh it's hot." she said , trying to leave the store only to be pulled back. "stay."
felix and her talked between the cashier trying to take their order. "i learned italian a year ago , give me a break." she stressed , they finally got their order down. "stay , I'm not only a singer , but a translator." she said. "what are you saying you barely understand korean." she scoffed at her boyfriend. "yah , i understand korean , i've lived their for like 10 years." he smiled evilly at his camera. "yah , yang jeongin."
with 20 minutes to spare , they took off down the street to find the gelato place. "i want chocolate." she said. "cone or cup?" she thought about it. "a cup please."
after getting her cup , she sat on the bench , eating the treat. "what kind did you get." jeongin asked. "here it's choco." she fed him a spoonful. "mmm."
she finished her cup , disposing of the trash right on time , before felix looked at the time. "let's go pick up the pizza." they all set off back to the pizza parlor.
they waited for the pizza , heading back to the villa where everyone waited around to eat.
she took a bit of the pizza , humming. "it's good." she said. besides the pizza she also had a few bites of the kebab chan and changbin bought and a chicken finger. "you want a beer?" she nodded , opening the bottle , pouring it over some ice.
lino then brought up the topic of them all splitting up into groups of two to a dorm. "chan and our maknaes are moving in together right?" she nodded. "as expected, how could we ever separate them?" changbin said making the two shake their head. "how do you feel?"
"finally have space for my clothes." she agreed. "between the two of them , so many clothes." chan said. "and bibis shoes, so many shoes , and i've only seen her wear 4 of the same pair." she smiled. "that's cause she just buys them to buy them , yah i told you to stop that." lino scolded her. "I definitely won't miss you scolded me , I bought those a while ago I've stopped now I swear." she said.
"but you know it's easier to make music now." she said. "whenever I need help , I can just call channie oppa." the elder laughed beside her. "you mostly make music with han though." she agreed. "yes but would you live in the dorms with the chopsticks?" she questioned. "yah , you're one to talk , when's the last time you lived away from innie?" hyunjin said which made them laugh and the boy next to her turned red. "okay , okay you got me there." she said.
they spent the rest of the dinner talking amongst each other , reminiscing about when they debut and stuff.
"i visited the cafe too." she said. "i saw it on twitter." felix said. "i bought the fans inside the store at the time , I paid for their drinks , they were so happy." she said. "it made my heart swell , they kept thanking me over and over." she smiled.
"when we were trainees , all of us were jealous of chans team." changbin confessed. "the team that didn't have chan was doomed to fail." she agreed. "I would see them training and I would be so jealous , ah , why can't that be me." she said.
"bibi didn't start training with us until very close to the show." she nodded. "it was new , I went from training with the girls team , to suddenly training with an entirely different group of people , I was so confused." she said. "like why did they move me all of a sudden? this is so is so confusing." she said. "I thought they were joking , so the next day I went to train with the girls." she laughed. "when they said that I thought ah guess they were serious."
"I think we were all confused too ." han said. "but we all trusted that chan knew what he was doing." she nodded. "well eventually i did." he glared at the girl. "oppa do you know how confusing it is to explain what I do to people." They laughed. "what do you do for work ? ah I'm a singer in a group? oh like itzy or aespa a girl group? no stray kids" she expressed. "they're so confused."
"I'm sure it's like this for everyone , but with skz continuing as 9 members , I didn't hesitate at all." seungmin spoke up once the mood was more calmer , they agreed. "i don't think there was even a moment where i had a second thought , this is my life , and I don't think there's anything I would rather be doing than this right now , with you guys." she said.
"i've grown up with straykids and stay."
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©️SKZ-BIBI
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zozowiththefrofro · 4 months ago
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Husband!Sakusa after games<3
MDNI!! (Just a teenie weeny bit ooc, and thats if you squint) ft. Hinata (All characters are aged up!)
Just thinking about HUSBAND!Sakusa who loves you in every way, but doesn't show it in public. Its like a teenager getting embarrassed by their parents in public just because during their game, their parents cheer them on, but they love their parents so much that they just shrug it off and love them back and appreciate the cheering and affection.
Though, HUSBAND!Sakusa, as much as he loves cuddling you after you guys take a nice shower together and be all up in each others warm embrace, he would also like another type of warm embrace, one that relieves his and your stress.
HUSBAND!Sakusa sometimes can't wait to get you home and make you feel good, that he goes into the locker rooms and sits on the bench and jerks himself off to one of those nudes you sent to him days ago, because you weren't at his game that day. "Saku-san!" He basically almost got whiplash from turning his head towards Hinata and he just got done finishing and putting his pp back in, and still wanting you because he can't help but miss you and kind of regrets not giving you a kiss after he rejected it in public, a week ago, and all the affection you wanted but he didn't want to get caught in the daylight giving you.
HUSBAND!Sakusa who as soon as he gets home he catches you in the bedroom on your phone and greets you with a passionate kiss and tells you, " I'll be out in a minute, Germ," was left there just to have you say, " Okay baby, cuddles are waiting for you when you get out!" That was when he then smiled at you a little and then went into your shared bathroom.
HUSBAND!Sakusa who comes out the shower and puts on clothes goes up to you and gets in the bed and cuddles with you with his head on your watermelons and one hand on your peach(IYKYK) and another wrapped around you waist with both of you guys' legs tangled up.
HUSBAND!Sakusa rubs and grinds on you when he's needy, but this time it was different...he had flipped both of you to where he was on top of you and you were under and then he gave you sweet words as you asked him if he was okay and what the hell was he doing, "Don't worry Germ, I'm gonna make you feel really good, just relax."
HUSBAND!Sakusa who is now eating you out like its his last meal, is just loving the faces you make when he is slurping and using his tongue well, up and down your clit and inside you cunt. "You're doing so good baby, so delicious just for me."
HUSBAND!Sakusa who then flips you over into doggy style and starts ramming into like he didn't just give you some of the best cunnilingus in your life, his tip hitting your g-spot along with your cervix, you're clenching around him so tight, he starts kissing your neck and start whispering sweet nothings into your ear while he grunt and groans, as he is about to finish.
HUSBAND!Sakusa who cuddles you after and tells you that he loves you and tells you all these sweet things and how he needs to be more affectionate with you, but then runs you as bath with your favorite bubble bath and everything because you know he doesn't like germs...but under all that shyness on the outside in public, no matter what, he always will love you just the way you need to be loved in the sheets, but not as much in the streets...well maybe.
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