#I'm doubting myself
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I'm not loving the draft I'm working on for this request, but I'll finish it. I hope someone will enjoy it.
#it's been months#months of working on this request#I'm tired#my mojo is gone#I'm doubting myself#my skills#my writing#i'm overthinking#i'm cringing over every single little thing i write#cellophaine random rambles
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With the end of season two comes a second redraw!
[Nov 2022] [June 2023] [June 2024]
#better drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#lan wangji#I was really looking forwards to this redraw - though the jump in skill isn't as dramatic as the last one I still am proud of my progress!#It's really incredible to look back on this last year and how much has happened since then.#Both in my personal life and this blog.#I started the second season while I was going through some pretty rough times and it truly kept my sanity afloat.#I challenged myself a lot more this year! And while it didn't always turn out the way I hoped-#-being messy and earnestly trying to do something different has been my favourite part of art.#There will always be a lot of room to grow - I don't think art and creativity has a ceiling.#I went from doubting that I was even an artist to joining a gamedev team as the lead artist! That's character growth!#Thank you all once again for joining me on this journey B*)#Thank you for all the messages and support you have sent my way these last 18 months.#I'm so happy to have been given the chance to create something for this community. You've given me so much and I am so grateful.#I'll take a little break to post some personal project stuff this week and resume season three after that!#Onwards to another season of silly (and sometimes serious) comics!
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Day 12 : Mistletoe 🍒
Ikemen Advent hosted by Mimi @candied-boys and Julie @queengiuliettafirstlady (..◜ᴗ◝..) (..◜ᴗ◝..)
i draw Jude and Victor! (+Will and Ellis :3 )
Just another normal Crown's day in the Christmas season ..........
#ikemenadvent#ikemen villains#ikevil jude#ikevil william#ikevil victor#ikevil ellis#i don't know if anyone doubt this but the reason why i mostly gave them a really simple clothes is just because it's easier for me :3#i don't want to overwhelm myself too much... i'm here to have fun!!!
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HELL YES
They said in the comments that these are all canon 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍 happy pride to us holy shit
#helluva boss#Personally it's Octavia being ace for me. I'm not even ace myself but I love this representation so much omg#Also curious how some don't have flags. I don't doubt some of them are straight but I think they just don't want to reveal some sexualities#Maybe because they want it to be revealed in the show. Maybe because the characters themselves don't know/don't want to share#helluva blitz#helluva stolas#helluva vassago#helluva andrealphus#helluva moxxie#helluva millie#helluva beelzebub#helluva fizzarolli#helluva ozzie#helluva octavia#helluva barbie wire#Helluva Chaz#helluva verosika#helluva sallie may#image description in alt
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I see so many things where like SY is the sweet innocent one who shows SJ how to love and be loved and fixes him blah blah blah. But oh come on now, this is Peerless Cucumber we're talking about. Number one hater extraordinaire. He is so bitchy. He would not fix SJ if anything he would make him worse.
I need more content that's just SY and SJ standing with their twin fans unfolded, viciously tearing their opponents (the other peak lords) apart with their barbed insults. I need them casting vicious mockery within every battle, whether it be against demon, peak lord, or random civilian who just happened to spill tea on them.
#am i perfectly capable of writing this myself?#yes but I'm too busy writing my feral teen sy au for this one#if pidw didn't have slurs before it sure does after sy and sj meet#they're both haters your honor#and i think they deserve to utilize their bitchyness at max capacity#god help those poor souls who get caught in the crossfire#i think airplane would be like relieved??#that other people are now getting the full force of peerless cucumber that he got in the other world#the only person who is free from sy torment is binghe#maybe sy nags sj enough that he lets up on binghe#but doubt#svsss#scum villains self saving system#shen yuan#shen jiu#scum villian self saving system
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✧*:・゚Art summary 2024
2014-2017 | 2018 | 2019 | 2020 | 2021
#art summary#art summary 2024#art summary meme#my art#I know two years are missing but I wanted to get back to doing this summary#no art in November apart from that little mushroom so I didn't separate Aster and Kornelia (I like that drawing lol)#I draw significantly less and even less for myself but I don't mind for some reason#idk maybe my hyperfixation is now writing#I used to draw and learn about art and consume it in every way#and then I think Al came in and started to slowly destroy that obsession bringing doubts about my skills and the whole sense of creating#I don't look for new art that much because the constant suspicion spoils the joy of exploration#I don't feel like posting drawings in low res blurry with added artefacts knowing they will be ground into mush anyway#all so the rich dudes become richer and the spiteful dudes drown in their own venom#I know writing is treated the same way as visual art#it's art after all so something useless and pointless#but at least I don't have to post my chapters every month and watch as they disappear in the everyday slop#though I'm sure the big bosses will take my words and feed them to the machines as well because why not#sorry about the tags xD#HAPPY NEW YEAR! (soon)#I hope 2025 is the year the Al bros choke ;)
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When you need to lie, but you're a good boy.
#Lies of P#lop#neowiz#pinocchio#fanart#comic#comics#interrupting your local d2 art fever for puppet time -- we shall return soon#I'm not done with the game yet so i ain't checking tags#steamrolled this one bc i still wanna do another d2 comic for the weekend#cant lose momentum yet yelp#as i prepare this post i'm stuck on the cathedral boss for two afternoons already#like-- i am having progress with the battle and improving my timing so i guess that's something?#i'm not a souls player -- that's my brother -- but when i doubt myself he pats me and#'nah you are a souls player - you have persistence' and honestly he's not wrong#i'm actually enjoying the learning process of the battle even tho i'm stuck for two afternoons#i mean i spent 37 hours on the demo so at least i am taking my time sdfghjhgfd
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"Minthara is so abusive to the player" *INCORRECT BUZZER NOISE*
Minthara would literally go to fucking hell for the opportunity to personally beat the absolute shit out of the person who actually did abuse you. She will throw hands with gods and devils just to avenge you.
And you will not be able to convince her not to.
#bg3#baldur's gate#minthara#minthara baenre#evil murder kitten#when i'm having a bad day - i just remind myself that minthara would definitely have some things to say about my parents#i would literally have to hold her back from knocking their lights out#well... id hold her back from one of them. she can have free reign of the other#all you gotta do is whisper a name - and babygurl is gonna go fix it#within 48 - 72 hours - your abuser will go missing under mysterious circumstances#and you do not even need to tell her to do this#she will do everything she can to ensure you can sleep at night knowing your abuser is gone#and can never touch you again#and if you still have doubts - just remember that she made an oath (a divine vow) *to you*#in which she will never harm you nor allow harm to come to you#and to quite literally seek vengeance against all those who have harmed you#ya'll can miss me with your minthara hatecanons and your poorly misunderstood readings of her and the comments taken outta context
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Sorry for being such a poopyhead and letting my negative emotions take ahold of me and control my thought process for nearly 3 days guys anyways self-esteem has been recovered (somewhat) and now I'm just doing a colorblind challenge using Caine to test if I can still paint
(I disabled colors on my screens and therefore CANNOT see any of the colors even in this screenshot, I'm relying purely on values and all I can see are black and whites) (EDIT: Okay, I forgot the exception to this challenge was Caine's eyes because I wanted it to be the same as his original palette just in case this attempt's palette was too unrecognizable.)
I also discovered I like cooking as a hobby during those 3 days of self-reflection. I should stop being terminally online more often
#Ziku's insane rambles#life update#personal post#tadc#the amazing digital circus#tadc caine#caine#art wip#digital art#the last three days were both hellish and eye-opening#so I'm still glad I took that break#turns out it's even what I needed for myself#before I took the break I was having MAD doubts about my artistic skills and very bad thoughts#now I'm back on the saddle again#sometimes all you need is to take a step back#when things feel overwhelming; step away from the keyboard#trust the process :)
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blessed be (lorscher bienensegen) | telling the bees (wiþ ymbe)
"Bees" [remixed, abridged], Claudia Emerson // "Letter to Someone Living Fifty Years from Now" [remixed. abridged], Matthew Olzmann // "Letter to my Great, Great Grandchild" [remixed, abridged], J.P. Grasser | Len Redkole, Nina Weiss, Brian Babineau, Christian Peterson, Mitchell Leff, Dave Isaac, Megan DeRuchie
#liv in the replies#if i were insane there would be an appendix to this called telling the bees however i finished this at 3am yesterday its nearly midnight &#my cutoff is when my ahl asg stream cuts. GOD by now i should know when i save a poem like hmm. not applicable but god it'd be perfect#THAT'S A CURSE. DON'T PUT IT IN THE DOCUMENT. DON'T SAVE IT. FORGET YOU READ IT. IT'S A CURSE!! <- things i should've told myself when i#went to read bees was already like 👀 &then the first line was FUCKING CLAUDE!!!!! anyway. sorry also this is like. insanely long but ALSO#regarding mf claude. the first picture is a leftover from the claude edit i made years ago so that feels GREAT and BEAUTIFUL & also for me#as ever y'all will be getting a full breakdown. starting with what i regularly have a breakdown about every time i see it which is joelle's#james 1:12 tattoo which if u use the king james version (gay) is blessed is he who perseveres under trial because having stood the test he#will receive the crown of life the lord has promised to those who love him. which i always go blessed is he who perseveres // for those who#love him. and that's joel. ignoring him getting it then getting sent down on his birthday IGNORING IT. also we know the frosty/maple leafs#hahaha fuck the flyers lore right? good. that's morgan and his dad also bc i love a baby picture & it was perfect. also the dave isaac pic#next was in an article talking about morgan 'stung' by draft camp. shut UP. i have an alt for tells him with claude and ALSO hate the#elephant w/phil bc myesie u fuckin leaf-eater (giraffe) but i love the composition of that jake shot & had to use it (it was also almost#tells him) with thylacine jakey frog nolan also raff the extinct whale bc i needed him here. if my editing on incapable of joy is bad no on#tell me i did some SHENANIGANS to put morgan in there & color-pick/alter his jersey. new skill. i think euphoria is one of my favorite for#the sake of pride night but ALSO that polaroid kills me very time &they're so stoners contemplate the universe but ALSO i love transcendenc#so that whole three photo string i think is my favorite. and i was in looking at these like listen okay it's okay there are only so many#photos in the world. you can repeat from others you've seen before. except ALSO there's so many of these freaks together do you separate#and every time i was like there can't be more there was more. don't ask the number of back-ups for the sweetest blossom/pinch/ruffle sets#okay also the ready to be stung one was a surprise favorite fit for me because i love that line but wasn't sure how to convey it? so it's o#i think with how morgan's face is and the almost of it all. yes joel hardest trier is in there purely for me i do have an alt but. how coul#u doubt him. insert sasha's tweet abt how much joel loves philly but all his quotes have been abt being excited for morgan to have a fresh#start. AND NOT EVEN TWO MINUTES IN CALGARY AND YOU'RE STILL INSEPARABLE god i literally googled frost farabee calgary to find the last#blessed [because. heard but not seen you know of everyone traded but you went together. not seen. (which ties into the terrible appendix)]#and IT DIDN'T EVEN TAKE ME TWO MINUTES TO FIND THAT!!! WHAT DO YOU MEANNN anyway. sorry again it's so long & also i will be vanishing a wee#& a half after posting [redacted] is kicking my ass & im doing [redacted fun things WAIT ACTUALLY U CAN KNOW ONE i'm seeing hippo campus]#morgan frost#joel farabee#philadelphia flyers#calgary flames
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[Stan] "...And if you find someone worth holding on to... never, ever, let them go. Follow your own path.
"Think of this letter as a promise."
[Eddie] "A promise I'm asking you to make."
[Mike] "To me."
[Ben] "To each other."
[Bev] "An oath."
[Stanley] "See, the thing about being a Loser is... you don't have anything to lose. So..."
[Young Richie] "Be true."
[Young Eddie] "Be brave."
[Young Mike] "Stand."
[Young Bev] "Believe."
[Young Bill] "And don't ever forget..."
[Young Stan] "We're Losers... and we always will be."
#it 2019#the losers club#the young losers club#i am in no way kidding when i tell you that i typed this through tears#right strap in for some TAGS#firstly i KNOW this is technically more than one line but also it's one letter so i'm giving myself the benefit of the doubt teehee#secondly here we are!#i appreciate you fellas sticking around#i didn't expect this stupid little blog to get as well-recognised as it did#having said that y'all had better stick around!!#i will be answering the asks that have already been sent to me#plus any more that come in!#(leave me anything you want - it related or not - i don't mind!)#and we'll see if i feel up to anything else in the near future (more information to come!) ;)#thank y'all sincerely from the bottom of my little gay heart#- one-line <3
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This is your sign to be unhinged about your own characters and stories
I am giving you permission to make yourself whatever you want. set yourself free.
Make relationship charts.
Quizzes.
AUs.
Memes.
Moodboards.
Gifsets.
Animations.
youtube
Comics.
Form headcanons of your own characters, write yourself fanfic, dream up theories!
If it's fun, do it! DO IT!!!
You and your characters deserve to live!!!
It's enrichment!!! do it!!! Be alive and breathe life into your work! let it live!
#Youtube#the youtube tag was automatically added? anyways.#enrichment#my art#uhhh..#memes#time and time again#webtoon#ttawebcomic#I'm being so so so so so genuinely serious about this by the way#it's genuinely so good for me and my mind#IDK if it discourages other people from making stuff at all?#I would be super doubtful that it would lol#but if it does then... if nothing else#it makes it so people have something a little more to enjoy than just my comic#but most of all.#its fun for ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1#THE MOST IMPORTANT MEMBER OF MY AUDIENCE!!!!!!!!!!!!!#I do also absolutely write myself fanfics#but no one gets to see that lol...#oh yeah#long post#sorry I always forget that one
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Also, kind of odd, maybe, but one of my favourite things this ep was the way Fadel gave Style most of the water and food and gave it to him fairly easily (if not gently lol), while Bison used the food and water to taunt Kant? I guess because it's a nice illustration of their mindsets and their characters at this point and I love little moments like that (I've really enjoyed all the ways we see how differently Bison and Kant react to the same situations)
But I loved it even more once Bison is the first to break down and believe Kant vs Fadel who very obviously wants to believe Style but is still trying not to, or something. Anyway, it just felt like a nice contrast to me, and I don't know how to elaborate on why, but it stuck out to me and I wanted to mention it, I guess
#the heart killers#kantbison#fadelstyle#i was going to try to elaborate but i'm wrong like 99% of the time so i decided not to#well i will but i'm hiding it in the tags:#and like where Bison was trying to keep his distance and protect himself by being cruel and punishing Kant#Fadel is not doing any of that. He keeps being drawn to and undone by Style even if he is still telling Style he doesn't believe him...#will never believe him and is going to kill him. All very unconvincingly#but you can still see he thinks he *should* be wary and distancing himself#thinks what he's saying should be true (again vs bison who never thought that way??)#idk i started out writing this like yeah!!! and then slowly started to doubt myself#lazzarella watches tv#thk*
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If I write a series of teenage Logan and his dads (Nico and Jenson) would you guys read it? Because I have so many ideas but I don't want to write all of the fics of no one id gonna read them😭
#formula 1#f1#formula one rpf#logan and his dads#logan sargeant#jenson button#nico rosberg#tell me your opinions#because i want to#but I'm doubting myself
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honestly I found conclave to be such a moving exploration of faith. lawrence, throughout it all, placed his trust in god and the true intention of the conclave despite his crisis of faith, and despite nearly everyone, including himself, at some point falling into the political game, putting themselves and their ambitions, their doubts, over doing the right thing. so many of the characters have stopped truly examining themselves and their relationship with god. many characters have done horrible things and hold horrible views. which is why benitez's election really does feel like the work of the holy spirit, the way it's supposed to be—choosing the best candidate without any of the politicking the previous contenders relied on. in scripture, the holy spirit speaks through the mouths of men. in the end, god comes through.
#mmm I'm not really articulating myself well but it's such a hopeful movie#and in the film god is absolutely meant to exist and in a beautiful way too#personally I have. a complicated relationship with catholicism.#and theism. call me thomas lawrence the way I hashtag doubt.#but I feel like conclave really reflected on a lot of my own problems with the church#while at the same time highlighting what I still find beautiful within it#conclave#lanecdotes
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I was thinking last night.
So we know after things got, ah, "tense" between Prost and Senna, Senna wouldn't refer to Prost by name.
Do you think that was him trying to separate his team-mate/arch nemesis from the person he had looked up to and admired growing up.
Like, "Oh that guy who drives the other McLaren? Oh, that's not Alain Prost, the guy who's poster is still up in my childhood bedroom. That's "The Other One". Totally different person. I hate that guy."
Maybe this has already been said before, but I was just thinking about it so I thought I'd share again
#I find A. Senna's mind fascinating#there were two worlds#his world and the real world#and these were completely separate and yet he lived in both at the same time#I'm not explaining myself very well#this guy was absolutely on the spectrum I have no doubt about that#but that's only tangentially relevant#ayrton senna#alain prost#my yuji ide tag
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