#I'm ass-deep in the fandom and I still have no idea what's going on in the lore and stuff half the time lol

[howthesleeplesswander]

@fearbend continued from here!

Haughtiness dripped from her every word. Clearly the girl not only knew her own talents, but was unabashedly proud of them. Childe couldn't help but chuckle, remembering back to his days as a common Fatui foot soldier when he'd worn a similar look each time he bested his training partners.

If they'd ended up bloodied and bruised by the time he was done with them? Well, someone had to push the Tsaritsa's soldiers to improve when his superiors at the time clearly hadn't.

"A Vision is far more than a trinket, though I can see how it may seem that way to those who don't have one," he said with a shrug. Challenging words lit a spark in his eyes, and his grin stretched wider—sharpened just beyond the realm of 'friendly.'

"Besides, there's far more to my power than a Vision or a Delusion. Not that I expect you to take my word for it, of course; I'd be glad to prove it, if you're brave enough to take me on."

[cricket-of-the-hill]

So what's the deal with Fiddleford McGucket? Why's he like that?

Fiddleford as a character is so FUN because he's so complicated and tragic and honestly a little pathetic. On one hand you have this absolutely brilliant scientist with the potential to have been the in universe Steve Jobs who figured out that the universe is a hologram and built an honest to betsy transdimensional portal (with Ford's help, yes, but let's be honest: as mathematically brilliant as Ford was, I think his intelligence laid more in the theoretical side of things, really doubt he could have actually built the portal himself).

On the other hand, we have this man who up and leves his FAMILY to chase after a college friend who calls him one day saying "hey, I'm out in Oregon building a portal to another dimension. Little help?" and he doesn't even think twice before being like "bet" and getting his ass to Oregon. And even if you take in the context clues that things weren't going well with his marriage before he left (as pieced together by the brilliant @divorcedfiddleford in this post), he still had his son and McGucket Computermajigs and he just sets all that aside for this guy, which... 😶

I am gonna write this whole post on the assumption that Fiddleford was in love with Ford, but look, even if that's the case it doesn't make any of his actions less unhinged. Break here, because the post gets kinda long 😶‍🌫️

So here's the thing: in the fandom, it's fun to think that Fidds knew about Bill and they had some sort of taunting rivalry/love triangle thing going on and that's really fun to mess with, but FIDDLEFORD HAD NO IDEA ABOUT BILL. Ford never told him! So even if Fidds leaves California thinking he's gonna have his hot girl summer/queer arthouse romcom where he reconnects with the love of his youth and they spend the summer working in this secluded house in the woods where they can finally live out their romance, what he actually gets is a fucking psychological horror thriller where the guy he loves and is kinda trapped with is either slowly going insane or straight up getting possessed.

Now, all that is 😵‍💫 enough, but it gets worse because instead of doing the normal person thing and getting the hell out of Dodge, Fiddleford stays. He continues to help Ford to build the portal despite how weird the other man is getting, he continues to go cryptid hunting even after the nightmare goblin almost eats him, even if Ford clearly doesn't appreciate the work he does (research assistant? Not even partner? Come on), and never reciprocates the kind of gestures Fidds has towards him (like the infamous double Christmas gift bonanza).

Here's where the duality of Fiddleford Hadron McGucket kicks in: the thing is that he is incredibly brave in some ways and obviously really smart but also kind of a coward and an idiot when it comes to his relationships with others. He'll hit Thee Krampus upside the head with his banjo one day to save his friend and run away to Oregon instead of discussing divorce with this wife the next. He will leave everything he knows to pursue this one guy, but he will never ever ever confess to feeling anything other than friendship towards him. He'll put up with Stanford's creepy as all hell behavior but will never confront him about it even as Ford loses more and more of himself into his project (so no little intervention not even to help this man he's giving so much up for). Like, what was he expecting to get out of all this? If he was never planning to confess to Ford or leave his wife, what was he going to do once the portal was completed? Just keep on bouncing between wherever Ford went next and his family? Did he really think his wife and son wouldn't mind him leaving them behind without so much as a thought?

Operating under the assumption that Fiddleford is a closeted queer guy from rural Deep Down South Hillbilly County Tennessee (said with love, I'm also from the south, but we all know what homophobia looks like here) during the '80s (height of the aids pandemic which would have made everything worse) one can maybe understand why Fiddleford is like that. Why he is so so so afraid and why he ultimately chooses to erase his memories rather than just go back to his family.

So picture this: you are in love with your best friend but you can't tell him 'cause best case scenario he leaves you out to dry and worst case scenario maybe someone finds your boots down by the river and lets your parents know (and we know Ford is sweet and fruity himself and with a thing for outcasts and would never. Fiddleford probably knows that himself, but let me tell you that when you grow up with that fear it goes deep. Because you've most likely seen people who are kind get absolutely bent out of shape when confronted with the mere idea of someone like you existing in their near vicinity). Eventually, you get married and have a son because that is what you were supposed to do all along and even though you love your son and maybe even love your wife everything feels wrong. They expect you to be something you are not, you can never let your guard down, never be yourself, not even in your own home. So then that call comes and it's like a golden thicket: you can leave, give it a rest for a little while, go see your friend, stretch out those inventing muscles.

As much as the fandom clowns him for it, I honestly don't even think he went out there with the intention of cheating (emotionally or otherwise). BUT I do think he was hoping something would happen. It's just that it all depended on Ford taking that first step because Fidds sure as hell wouldn't. And then Ford didn't because he was too busy doing the sin cos tan with his trigonometry homework, but if he had, we could have had a brokenback mountain situation on our hands, lads. Then Fiddleford could have just gone along with it, and done all sorts of mind parkour to convince himself that that's somehow less bad than "outright" cheating on his wife.

So he gets to the cabin, right? And maybe things are good for a little while, like when they were in college. Fiddleford lets loose a little, Ford is happy with the company, they're friends! And I get the sense that they're the kind of friends that mesh really well, like their energies really match. As much as the fandom paints Fiddleford like a sweet cinnamon roll, that man is also a freak. He's out here building psychotic post divorce revenge pterodactyl robots and drinking abducted cow milk just to see what it's like. He's a bit unhinged! He and Ford are the two people in the world that can be like "I think the universe is a hologram." "Cool! Let's prove it mathematically, bro" and "I want to build a portal to another dimension. Just cause." "Catching a ride to your place with my toolbox as we speak, buddy." (My own personal head cannon is that Fiddleford didn't really become such a shaky jelly until the nightmare goblin got him. Like, he was never as adventurous as Ford, but I think before that particular traumatizing event he was all right for it).

Anyways, things are good for a bit, but the real world is still out there. Fiddleford has to make trips home every now and then, and every time he comes back it seems like something is different. A little off. At first it's nothing big, just a smile a little sharper than usual, a coldness in a look, Ford calling him "Specs" where before he was always a variation of his name. Then it's pointed comments that Fidds chalks up to a lack of sleep (is Ford even sleeping at all? Because he could have sworn for the past three nights he he has appeared in the same place Fidds left him when he went to sleep). Then it's a flash of yellow eyes, a maniacal laugh that Ford never used to make before, spells where he seemingly forgets how to use his body (bumps into things, tries to drink soda with his eyes?). As time goes on it starts to become more and more obvious that something is seriously wrong with this friend. And things back home are just getting worse and worse, Emma May isn't happy about Fiddleford skipping town so often, Tate wont stop asking for him, and look, was Fiddleford even making money while he was with Ford? He gettin' paid? Is Emma May back home trying to bring home the bacon while virtually single parenting? (How was Ford even supporting himself while studying anomalies? I can't imagine there's a lot of grants for that.)

But Fiddleford can't leave his friend and he can't really own up to how much messier things are at home because of this whole thing. So he keeps coming back to Gravity Falls, where he also can't really face up to Ford and either demand a clear answer as to what is going on or try to get him some help (an exorcist, maybe). Because if he does say something and Ford decides that he doesn't want Fiddleford around asking questions he's gonna have to go back home where after the Christmas thing he's honestly not sure he's really wanted anymore, not really sure he deserves it if he still was. So he keeps on doing his thing, telling himself "this is fine 🙂," while he sits in a room on fire with a bill-possessed Ford hanging from the ceiling like a spider and an disapproving Emma May looking in through a window.

I think the portal incident was what finally opened his eyes to the reality of his situation, in an ironic way. He destroyed his relationship with his wife and left his son for nothing. Left his own dreams and aspirations aside just to find out that when push comes to shove his opinion and well-being matter so little to this man he was ready to break the laws of physics for. He can't stay with Ford, and he sure as hell can't go back home, because that would mean having to face that he's done burned down all his bridges. So where do you go from there? Let me tell you, if I had the chance to forget the lowest, most selfish, stupid thing I did for a person who didn't even notice it, I'd do it in a second.

[kaisers-house-of-desires]

Hiii! Can I request a Gojo x male reader smut? The reader is shy especially when it come to intimacy so I feel like Gojo would tease and tease him to no end. Can you choose the kinks please? (But I'm thinking more along the lines of Bdsm or a lap dance or something. )

I really love your writing and I am sorry if this request is bad. Enjoy your day♡

Thank you for enjoying my writing! I would be more than happy to fulfill your request!

I hope you also have a good day, patron~

Title: A Hands On Lesson

Characters: Gojo x m!reader

Contains: light BDSM, blindfolding, hand job, self restraint, praise

Fandom: Jujutsu Kaisen

Full request below the cut

All characters are 18+

MINORS, FEM ALIGNED, AGELESS/BLANK BLOGS DNI

Reblogs > likes

“I-If you’re gonna keep teasing me then at least teach me!”

The words came out suddenly, your face red with embarrassment as you buried it into a pillow. Gojo had been on your ass—playfully, he says—about your shyness that it finally sent you over the edge. You two were sitting on his large bed when it came up once again, but you had had enough. Snapping, however, only made you blurt out your true feelings, leaving Gojo to get a rush of ideas.

“Teach you, huh? Are you sure about that?”

You couldn’t face him, even if his gaze was hidden by his sunglasses.

“I need an answer~”

“I…N-No you’re just gonna keep teasing me…”

“Oh, listen. I tease you because I love you. I don’t mean anything ill behind it. You’re just fun to rile up~ I like seeing your face get all red~”

You were silent, unsure of how to approach this.

“Look, if you really want to expand upon things, you might want to be open to more experiences. I’m more than willing to teach you. But…I’ll need a ‘yes, sir.’~”

Your brows furrowed as you finally looked up some. “W-Why that?”

“Consent of course! Plus…I’ve always wanted to hear that handsome voice call me ‘sir.’~”

Still flushed as ever, you took a deep breath. You had really wanted this, but the idea was always scary. However, you trusted Gojo; he was your boyfriend after all.

You thought it over another moment, clutching the pillow before releasing another deep breath. “Y-Yes, sir.”

A grin grew on Gojo’s lips as he crawled over to you like a predator that found its food, but instead of you, he actually went for the nightstand, retrieving his eye mask from the drawer.

“W-Why did you grab that?” you asked.

“Well, it’s part of your lesson. That is, if you allow me.”

You weren’t sure what this had to do with anything, but you scooted closer, putting the pillow aside and waiting for his next move. Gojo put the mask over your eyes, bunching up the fabric in a way that concealed your vision. For a moment you though he was gonna put it on himself, not you.

“Wh-What’s this for?”

“Trust me. It’s all part of the lesson okay?”

And trust him you did, taking deep breaths to settle your nerves.

“Now, will you be a good boy for me, and put your hands behind your back?” You started to before he stopped you. “Ah, could I hear a proper answer~?”

You could tell he was teasing you again. You fought your nerves, mustering up what confidence you had, which wasn’t much. Your voice sounded meek. “Y-Yes, sir.”

“Mm…we’ll work on it.”

With your hands behind your back, Gojo took action. He carefully unzipped your pants, his hand brushing your semi erect shaft.

“G-Gojo!”

He halted, watching as you trembled from that brief touch. Honestly he wasn’t sure how truly interested in this you were, so he came up with an idea.

“Hey, if you really, really don’t want to do this, just say…’pineapple’, okay?”

A safe word. Okay, that put your mind at ease a bit, because you weren’t even sure yourself what you wanted. At least you had a back up plan.

You nodded. “Y-Yeah. I gotcha. Um…g-go ahead then, just…d-don’t stare at it.”

“Don’t stare? What do you mean I can’t look at this gorgeous cock of yours~?” Gojo didn’t miss a beat getting back into it, working on revealing a partially hardened cock from its fabric confines. “I mean look at that~”

“G-Gojooooooo…” you whined softly, nails gently digging into your skin. His touch felt heightened thanks to the blindfold, and your trembling body was a clear sign of it.

“Good boy~ Very good boy~” He gently began to stroke your cock, anything soft nearly immediately hardening as you sighed out in slow, deep breaths. You didn’t know praise could feel so good. It felt nice hearing him call you a good boy.

“Wh-What else is…i-in this lesson?” you breathed, your hips rocking up to match his strokes.

“Hmm…Well first, good boys stay still…”

Though it wasn’t a command, you found yourself stilling in place, biting your cheek to help you focus.

“Oh? Well I wasn’t expecting that. You stilled yourself right away. I think that deserves a treat~”

You were about to ask what it was, but you stopped yourself, wanting to just see where this would lead. Knowing you had that safe word made this a little less scary, which left you open when Gojo’s hand picked up pace, causing you to actively moan out instead of whimper.

“There we go~ That’s my good boy~”

Every time he said it, you let out a whimper, enjoying the sensation the words gave you.

“G-Gojo…I-I…—a-ah~—I-It feels…g-good~”

Perhaps it was the blindfold, or maybe it was the trust you had for Gojo, but you didn’t feel as nervous. Sure it was still nerve wracking, or maybe your nerves were too wracked to notice, but the pace of his hand alone felt like bliss.

“G-Gojo…s-sir, I’m…I-I’m gonna…~”

“Go ahead~ I want to see that handsome face contort from this~”

You threw caution to the wind, your hands coming down to balance you on the bed, fingers clenching the bedding as you bucked up into his hand, panting deeply as your climax approached. You moaned for you boyfriend again and again, even as it pitched up, until you finally released over his hand with a broken moan, relaxing afterwards.

With a small smirk, Gojo raised his hand to his mouth, his tongue coming out to clean his hand while getting a taste of you with a soft groan.

“G-Gojo…” you breathed. “I…Th-That was…fun~”

You felt the bed shift, and the fabric lifted up from your eyes, Gojo’s face smiling smugly at you.

“Ready for lesson number two~?”

[ecto-hazard]

I just rewatched ii s1 (fucked up right?)

im just gonna make a post compiling some barebones concepts that im curious about. cause with the latest reveal, im wondering how much previous stuff might become relevant.

Obviously this was made years ago by a bunch of kids so its possible that most of the details can be disregarded as random bullshit. It does seem like they put a lot of work in creating retcons though so I have reason to believe theyre building off their previous work on purpose but i could be wrong and thats fair. im gonna post about it anyway tho

ii16 spoilers discussed under the cut

Who Mephone created (or rather, didn't create)

Mephone supposedly made every contestant for the show, but there's a couple vague characters.

Fan: weirdly enough he's in a gray area cause he appears as a background character before s2, but he also glitched out in that one episode, so its unlikely he wasnt created by Mephone. But yknow.

Apple: Apple is a fan character who was submitted to the show, and this is addressed in canon. It's possible that mephone made her and the other fan contestants based on whatever the submitters asked?

Bow: she randomly shows up after an ad read. Mephone doesnt seem to even want her to join, but he receives a call from Adam to insist she join. Mephone seems quite resistant to the idea (which would be weird if he made her?) Most interestingly, she's the only one in this list that Mephone couldn't recover.

Dough MIGHT be one mephone didnt create, but it seems pretty likely that Mephone would create him as he was specifically requested by adam to get bow back. Dough does seem like something he'd throw together really quickly to cover his ass

The reason any of this could be relevant is that if they arent created by Mephone, they probably cant be deleted by Cobs.

Adam

Stuff about Adam (the character not the guy) has been kinda quiet lately? He was supposedly the producer of ii, and pays mephone apparently? He clearly has a role to play since he showed up in one of Mephone's memories and seems to be a creation by cobs. So observing his actions in s1 might be valuable, especially since cobs would be able to manipulate the show through him.

Some notable actions of his:

Insisting on Bow being in the show. This is doubly interesting if Bow isn't one of Mephone's creations. She could be an industry plant of some kind?

Telling Mephone to keep 4S out of the season finale. This is supposedly to keep the finale from going crazy. If Mephone had been successful, he wouldve been killed by Mephone 5. Its possible this was on purpose so 4 could be destroyed and replaced

Investing in another season. at the end of s2, despite things going wrong, he tells Mephone they're going to do another season. He sweetens the deal by offering a raise and agreeing to get Mephone an assistant (Toilet). Cobs clearly got invested in this show, so it makes sense he'd encourage more of it from the shadows.

Mephone 4S

Yeah talking about 4S isn't anything new, the fandom's obsessed with him. I am too.

The implications of Mephone4 being in 4S's body never really got explored in s2. I guess they were similar enough that it didn't really matter. But he clearly still has some relevance in the modern series. One of Mephone's memories shows him getting developed as a replacement for 4, and he actually appears in Invitational, Sorta? Clearly Mephone's bothered by the sacrifice he made.

At the very least, the show's reminding us that he existed, so maybe he still does exist? I don't think he's going to necessarily make a comeback or anything but I dunno. It seems like he might be able to talk to Mephone in his head so maybe there's something to that.

Evil Paper

Im just gonna be upfront that I don't have a dissociative disorder and its not my place to talk about how it works or what is good or bad representation so I'm not gonna get super deep into talking about this. I'm just curious if the team has any plans for addressing Evil Paper. They seemed to make an effort into writing Yin Yang more thoughtfully (whether or not they actually succeeded, again, not my say). I could see them giving Paper similar treatment. If they did I doubt it'd be very plot relevant though.

Is the Taco we got the Taco we were supposed to have?

I've actually seen this conversation circulate a little bit already. This sort of debate could apply to any character really, but Taco is perhaps the most interesting example because she's so involved in the latest episodes AND because Brian actually addressed a tweet about this.

Taco behaves like a goofy idiot for the majority of s1, only revealing at the end that she was faking it so she would make it to the end. She specifically says she was "built to win" (the quote Brian addresses), and shows a much more competent side when she actually competes. In fact if it weren't for Bow's interference, Taco would have won the challenge (another case of Bow being weird).

This all seems to imply that Taco may have been intended to win the series by Mephone. Cobs points out to Suitcase and Knife that Mephone had "high hopes" for them, so it's not unreasonable to say that maybe certain characters were liked over others. Mephone never seems to give special treatment openly, but that doesn't mean that when he made certain contestants he didn't at the very least expect them to do well.

What is highly unlikely though is that Taco was created to be a twist villain. This results in Mephone's death after all (though the activity of Bow and Mephone 5 also could be to blame). Especially since he had pressure from Adam to keep things running smoothly, it just wouldn't make sense that Mephone would specifically create someone to toss a wrench in things. Most likely Taco developed like this on her own accord.

But that also raises the question, if she wasn't meant to be a villain, what was she supposed to be? How much of the taco we have now is the Taco that Mephone created? We don't actually see how he reacts to her "reveal" because he's in the middle of running away from 5. But everyone else clearly never saw it coming. OJ specifically comments that this doesn't seem like "the Taco he's been competing with all this time," and while that's written in reference to her reveal, it also could mean she WASNT the Taco he'd been competing with. We do get a hint or two of her true self in previous episodes, but its possible she wasn't ever supposed to be like that.

I think its possible Mephone4 created her as a goofy goober joke character initially, and over time, she changed. She developed into a more tactful and villainous character with her exposure to the contest.

A few things in the most recent episodes might allude to this. One thing being how in ii15 she discusses how she became aware of how much the contest is changing everyone, herself included. Secondly, in ii16 she tells Pickle that at the time she didn't consider how her actions were going to hurt him. This is a really shitty apology and no excuse for it, but it ALSO could mean that at the time, Taco really didn't think about it. In S1, she claims that she was just using him, but we don't know how aware of herself she was back then. Its possible that there was a past version of Taco who wasn't deadset on winning no matter the cost, and being in the game changed her.

Anyway these have been my slopthoughts. It's like 9 pm and ive been writing this for like an hour. Maybe most of this wont get addressed at all in the series, but I figured i might as well compile it down since I just finished s1

[isa-ghost]

Hey, do you have any Phil & Charlie hcs or perhaps Phil & Foolish?

I'm having such a struggle picking which fucking one to do bc on one hand Foolish probably has more material to work with but on the other I've seen Phil and Charlie interact so much (but like outside of qsmp) that I'd have a way better idea of their dynamic. Charlie Slimecicle log on qsmp more often you talented fuck.

Anyway we're gonna attempt some Phil/Foolish ones. I think they're called Immortals or some shit?? Idr.

qPhil headcanons masterlist

Phil had no fucking clue what Foolish's deal was prior to being paired with him on Bolas. He knew he was a goofy happy-go-lucky and talented guy that?? Maybe had allegiances with the Feds?? Hard to tell?? He thought it was a bit tbh. But Purgatory opened Phil's eyes up and he learned that yeah, he's kinda right to a degree. But there are still layers to Foolish despite how Just Vibing he is.

And holy shit can he TELL Foolish has the capacity to be terrifying. You're telling me an immortal shark-totem hybrid doesn't have the ability to kill a motherfucker violently??? NAH. Phil can tell if enough of the right buttons are pushed, Foolish would snap and tear a bitch to shreds. Likely for Leo.

Phil's not entirely sure he can trust Foolish bc he's so unclear about where his loyalties lie, but Phil CAN tell that Foolish keeps it that way for a reason, and Phil thinks it's smart. Despite not entirely trusting him, he believes Foolish wouldn't like. Sell out his friends for a corn chip, yknow?

Now when you take all the serious out of these two though, THEN it gets interesting. Foolish is one of the islanders that has the easiest time getting Phil to let loose. It's just contagious, Foolish is too silly.

At the same time Phil looks at him and is just like ???? How the fuck does he smile through the horrors like that ???? Like clearly he's aware Situations suck and he's anxious like anyone else so how does he have the willpower to be silly and chill???? Phil envies it. He's too full of anxiety. Survivalist's curse.

Foolish's laugh is pure serotonin to Phil. And kryptonite, Foolish's laugh makes Phil laugh. He can't help it. Motherfucker sounds like a window washer squeegee thing when he's dying.

They have 2 very different flavors of immortality to me and while I don't know how a conversation about it would go bc Foolish is so casual and Phil is so? Not secretive but like. Not nonchalant about it? There's still something there that the ccs should cook on. I'm begging them to, in fact.

Also something about how one of them has deep ties to the air and the other technically has deep ties to the sea. Something about that. Especially when used in like, a serious situation. Like spying on the Federation or some shit. Do you see my vision. Using their inborn abilities to their advantage while in collaboration with each other for the sake of them and their friends. Do you see it.

Phil: Gifting shed feathers to trusted loved ones 🤝🏻 Foolish: Gifting lost shark teeth to trusted loved ones

I don't headcanon Phil as a short king like the entire rest of the fandom apparently does but obviously Foolish is fucking enormous compared to 99% of people, Phil included. If Phil could fly he'd spitefully hover just a little higher than Foolish's full height just to mess with him.

FUCKING. TALENTED BIG BUILDS DUO. SHAKING THEM BY THE SHOULDERS WHEN WILL THEY COLLAB. (The kids beg for this often)

Foolish has no idea if he's some kinda deity or if he's just immortal with some kinda weird totem roots and it drives Phil insane bc the hardcore deities have such a different energy than him yet you're telling him (maybe) both are divinity??

Speaking of the hardcore deities, Phil desperately wants to introduce Foolish to the Ocean Overlord bc they're (maybe) both himbo gods with some sort of tie to the ocean that are just vibing their asses off. (Oh my god wait I'm cooking on that idea. Doozers let's cook together on this).

Phil is jealous that Foolish can still swim, the thing he's deeply connected to (esp with those cosmetic fins he has) but he can't fly, the thing he's deeply connected to. But really it's just that Foolish is lucky bc the Federation would have to horrifically butcher him more or less in order to take away his ability to swim properly. Phil's easier to forcibly contain.

Believe it or not, if a situation arose where it was necessary, Phil would pick Foolish for his team (again) in a heartbeat. He may not be as passionate about fighting as Etoiles, or as ruthless as Fit, but hes powerful nonetheless, a trusted friend, has been in that situation with Phil before, and is a beacon of positivity; excellent for morale. Silly disposition and weird alliances aside, Foolish is an invaluable addition to a team from an objective perspective.

[hausofmamadas]

SE LA ARRANCA A MORDIDAS | mystery of Amado's anonymous lady-hustlers, solved

⁂

Holy father who art in heaven, do I have some fucking cracked ass head-canon nonsense for us to👏🏽 day👏🏽 …………….. let’s get to it shall we??

so idk if anyone anyone being the largely nonexistent narcos fandom aka the void Im speaking into remembers that one scene from Narcos in S3 where sleazy!OG!Amado told that one story about those sex workers who robbed him blind, mid-mamadita?

anyone ..... no?

dwdwdw that's okay bc I brought some visual aids to assist in our collective remembrance of this glorious occasion

⁂

The scene starts like this: 👇

Okay, yeah, right? legendary? legendary. just truly legendary behavior skfjskj on all fronts. but the identities of these social justice warriors— no wait activists— no wait, crusad— er no, patriarchy demolishers? iconic crimies with a penchant for for mid-fellatic felonies like armed robbery have been completely anonymous thus far.

…………… until now.

Bc as always, Narcoverse papis Doug Miro, Andrés Baiz, and Carlo Bernard, never fail to fill in the blanks except when they do cause Griselda left a lot to be desired and this is arguably the best ep of the show which, yeah. it’s never ideal when the best ep of a 6ep limited series is the 2nd one si me entiendes😬😬😬 but we digress because im 99.99999999999999% sure if these two sex workers from Griselda aren’t also the two legends who hustled Amado’s dick money out his pants pockets without having to fire so much as a single shot, I’m fairly certain they’re at least inspired by and carrying the torch aka bottling and distilling that Big Dick Energy to perfection of those brave women.

What gave me this idea? So glad you asked dear reader you didn’t but we’ll just pretend you did cause this my haus KEKW…. No like even I rolled my eyes at my own self for that but i couldn’t refrain either.

It all happened when I was nursing my new obsession with a one, Mr. Darío Sepúlveda a name I would most certainly believe to be fucking fake were he not an irl human bean.

👇👇 THIS slice of sweet, cherry pie right tf here

And I stumbled upon this one specific part, where the look on this chick’s face is SO FUCKINGKDHDHDGWVE SIMILAR to Amado’s face, when he’s explaining 👇👇👇👇👇👇👇how the burgling commences when the gurgling is interrupted by with an uncomfortable silence, as this chick proceeds to, hog still in mouth, cease any and all throat activity and fuckingskdfjskl just stare. up. at. him.

all 🙇🏻‍♀️🙇🏻‍♀️🙇🏻‍♀️🙇🏻‍♀️🙇🏻‍♀️🙇🏻‍♀️🙇🏻‍♀️

Like tell me homegirl’s face here👇👇 👇👇 doesn’t look just like it????????????

YOU CANTSJSHSJSHWUS YOU cANT. EVIDENCE IS IRREFUTABLE.

Anyway. Movingright along.

So, if aforementioned homegirl is the 🙇🏻‍♀️ from la historia del grande señor de los cielos, then that makes this ☝️☝️☝️☝️☝️☝️☝️☝️☝️☝️☝️ ... homegirl’s accomplice

with the👇👇sidearm

and like the general only slightly subtle "I eat dicks like urs for breakfast, lunch, dinner, and a midnight snack" vibes that this duo is serving throughout but esp below bc never will I ever not refer to a fuckboy as mancito from now until I'm in my grave alsdkjfa like MANCITO. THE WAY SHE SAYS IT WITH SUCH ALSKDJFKS CONTEMPT, CAN YOU STAND IT????? makes it so clear in my mind's eye how they could 100000000000%% be the unnamed heroes thieves from Amado's little story

also full 180 just on the low but can we all moment of silence for this 👇👇 FUCKINGSDLDFJ LOOK ON DARIO'S FACE WHEN SHE CORRECTS HIM, "quien te dijo eso? ... un mancito?" LIKE HE FUCKIGNSLDFKJSLKJ KNOWS, HE KNOWS HE HAS ERRED ON THIS PATH, HE KNOWS HE CANNOT PASS GO, CANNOT COLLECT 200 DOLLARS AND HE HAS THE GOOD SENSE TO BE GRACIOUS ABOUT IT AND IMAS;DFLIJA;LWEJF;KAJWE;FAKJ; SFUCKINGS DFKLJSLDF JA;K CRYING, SCREAMING, THROWING UP, INCONSOLABLE. LIKE LOOK. AT THIS. OKAY, THAT A MAN, NO MANCITO

*smacks own face, jiggles head back and forth, takes deep breath* anyway.... back to the story

and this is where this prob super unhinged really solidifies bc let's join hands class and pledge alliegance to the most impressive and noteworthy alpha but in the most non-cringe way assertion of dominance I have ever fucking witnessed in all my days. Like, legit the next time i'm into a dude the way i say this like it's not an 'if' bc RIP to my love life lbr fuck all that playing coy, fuck all that flirting. We just gonna get right to the point bc imma climb all over his lap, purr in his face, and ask about his hobbies like it's the 1978 equivalent of a Hinge profile SKSKKSK

and the next time I am spurned I will absolutely grab his junk in a naked hahahaksdjfk grab for a proper leash power to gain the upper hand in the situation and shame any and all menfolk who claim to not like me bc I'm not their 'type.' which like sksjsjsjs admittedly poor Dario just said that as a pretense to get the chisme from the chick who hates Grislenda bc the look of unconcealed regret on his face when Mistress Mamma Crotch Snatcher Morton gets up seems like a good indicator he would've paid to play with his balls

BUT LIKE SIDE BY SIDE WITH AMADO GETTING TO THE metaphorical CLIMAX bc I sincerely doubt they let him bust, mid-robbery OF HIS STORY, CAN WE NOT SEE HOW CLEARLY THESE TWO WOMEN WERE THE ONES WHO JACKED AMADO OFF– NO WAIT THEY DECIDEDLY DID NOT DO THAT ALL OF AMADO’S SHIT, LIKE CAUGHT PAPI WITH HIS ACTUAL PANTS DOWN SKSJSB

and lest any of us were convinced that Lady "Hijueputa Mandona Esa" who hates Griselda wasn't the one holding the gun on Toque, telling Amado she's gonna have her friend chew clear through his disco stick like some froot by the foot, please refer to exhibit B here ☝️☝️☝️☝️☝️☝️where she's manspreading for jesus in these fucking hot pants. I mean try to tell me that ain't power. c'mon

AND THEN THE WAY SHE FUCKINGSLDFKJSL HUSTLES DARIO FOR EXTRA CASH, ALL "you gotta pay me more than that pittance bc yeah, she were a mouthy bitch but I didn't hate her that bad" ensuring he had no choice but to leave a tip, just like our pobre mujeriego, himbo extraordinaire, Sleazy!OG!Amado

And if this isn't the most iconic reminder to tip your servers, folks which everyone should be doing already I truly don't know what is.

═

taglist: @ashlingnarcos @tofuwildcard @narcolini @drabbles-mc

[lovelyjasmari]

Pomefiore Endnote - Perfectionism, Apathy and the True Tragedy of Book 5

Warning: Long post and pic heavy.

So…this is something of a continuation of my last twst reaction post, where I analyzed the Absolutely Beautiful dance video. I ended the post by saying that the true tragedy was not that NRC Tribe lost but that Vil could be convinced he was an inferior performer compared to Neige. Now I’m going to expand on that…in excruciating detail. XD

In all seriousness, though, I'm not really sure if I'd call this an analysis in the traditional sense. Maybe more like a long-winded rant based on canon observations. But all the same, I’ve been grappling with this for the last year and a half since when Book 6 first dropped in EN. I’ve wanted to share my thoughts for a long time but decided against it because I acknowledge how contentious this topic is in the fandom and I prefer to keep my online space as drama-free as possible. I also didn’t want anyone to get the idea I’m attacking others when at most, I’m just being critical. 

But with the new story update imminent and it looking like it will be Pomefiore-centric, I’ve come to the realization that if I don’t share this soon, I never will. My timing is admittedly ass but I think it would be worse if I share this AFTER the update and you’re about to understand why.

So before we dive in, disclaimer. This is going to cover the end of Book 5 and the first few chapters of Book 6 and my in-depth opinions on both. There will be mentions of trauma/mental illness and some very blunt (but honest) Rook criticism. But please keep in mind, that while I have my own interpretation of the twst characters and their respective arcs, I am not Yana and ultimately, my opinions are just that. Opinions. Everything I say is subjective at best but a lot of what’s coming up is based on a blend of canon observations as well as my own specific, personal experiences as someone with very similar life experiences as Vil and has been dancing for most of her life.  

Still, these are just opinions and I have no intention to offend anyone. But if you don’t like reading negative things about Rook or take issue with this general way of thinking, I HIGHLY advise you to ignore this and respectfully (or quietly) agree that we disagree.

When I wrote the greater bulk of this, it was around when Book 6 dropped in EN. A year has passed since then and I’ve had time to think more about my opinions here and, to a greater extent, how I feel about Book 5. This may sound strange but I feel that Book 5 is both the best and worst part of twst’s main story to date. I really like how it touched upon something that isn’t really isn’t talked about much; how we as a society both admire beauty but also vilify it. Vil’s primary dilemma is how he is wrongfully villainized for his beauty, wealth, and harsh personality, despite subverting expectations of cruelty at every turn. Ironically, when the fandom mischaracterizes him as vain, cruel, classist, racist and the like, they are falling into that same literary trap. Proving the point of his arc.

And as much as I hated the ending from an emotional point of view, I actually love it as well, ironically for reasons that might not have been intentional. What I hated, mostly, was the fandom’s response. There was a great opportunity here for some deep discussion regarding society’s views on beauty, how constant trauma causes us to internalize false perceptions of ourselves, and the rather fascinating/dangerous dynamic Vil has with his vice dorm leader. Instead, any interesting discourse has been lost in all the misinterpretations of Vil. To the point I wonder if we all actually read the same story. I’m disappointed in the fandom, but somehow not surprised either.

But regardless, Rook’s actions were extremely disquieting but not for the reasons you might think. There was nothing wrong with his decision but the way he went about it and how he (and Vil) tried to justify it really left such a nasty taste in my mouth and I gotta talk about it to get it out.

First I just want to commend Vil for his level of maturity and rationality regarding his overblot. Even when it was happening, not once has he tried to justify his actions and in fact it was his own guilt at his potential wrongdoing that ultimately caused it. His fear that in a brief, desperate attempt to be seen as not a monster, he became exactly that. Throughout Book 5, it is implied that Vil already sees himself as a villainous person and internalizes that image of himself almost with pride. But despite this false perception, his actions have always proven the opposite and it’s clear that Vil has always valued being altruistic, determined and just. And his guilt when he failed to meet his own standards was beyond compare.

I feel that this guilt sets Vil apart from the other overblots thus far. Most importantly, he apologized of his own volition and wasn’t forced to. That alone makes him stand out among the overblot characters and, to my mind, makes him the most compelling of them all. If I’m being completely honest, out of all those who have overblotted thus far, Vil has been the LEAST problematic even before his overblot. And the one instance where Vil displayed any “cruelty” beforehand is EXTREMELY subjective. (his treatment of Epel) But the fact that Vil has been the least problematic overblot student so far also makes him the most tragic. And makes what’s about to happen next all the more disturbing.

Interestingly enough, Jamil is correct about this but for the wrong reason and here comes the first point. There was no indication that the audience was anything but enthralled with NRC Tribe. And if Vil or any of the others made significant mistakes, because of Vil’s fame, I’m certain they would have been pointed out by magicam netizens. With the recent release of the Absolutely Beautiful mv over on twst jp, we now also have a visual to go off from. 

I talk about this more in a previous post but basically, yes, NRC Tribe’s performance wasn’t perfect, but based on what I saw, I would have expected A LOT worse considering the circumstances. The fact is all evidence points to the NRC boys giving a wonderful performance made all the more remarkable by the fact they were still able to perform after dealing with Vil’s OB not too long before. And the audience clearly thought so too if they were only one vote away from victory. 

To add to this point, when the other characters comment on the NRC Tribe’s performance, they make no mention of any noticeable errors. And when Crowley laments their defeat later, again, there’s no mention of any errors. Considering that Ambrose was pretty pretentious about RSA winning, I'm sure he’d mention that, too. 

Even further, one thing you learn from being on stage is that your audience rarely notices mistakes unless they are extremely obvious. You, as the performer, might notice, but you quickly learn not to draw attention to your errors and keep it moving. Now of course, the NRC characters could be biased because they want to defeat RSA. But considering the nature of a lot of them, I doubt they would lie so flagrantly. Especially Jack who is pretty no-nonsense even with the people he likes. And Malleus who seems pretty difficult to impress. So if their commentaries are to be believed, this shows that any errors made by the NRC Tribe were not noticeable. 

That Vil would think otherwise speaks to something far deeper and far more insidious. Stick a pin in that; we’ll come back to it soon enough.

Vil then goes on to explain to the boys that Neige and his friends worked just as hard and had their own struggles. That Neige grew up in an improvised environment and had to juggle acting obligations with household chores and helping out the dwarves. Again, it is extremely commendable that Vil is able to acknowledge this about this rival. It shows that his contempt for Neige was never as simple as “boo hoo people think he’s more beautiful than me” and he at least respects Neige’s efforts even if this explanation once again falls flat. 

Firstly, narratively speaking it doesn’t make sense that Vil is just finding out about Neige’s backstory now (likely from Rook) because I feel like he should already be aware. In fact, all through Book 5, I thought that he did know but didn’t care. Honestly, Neige’s backstory shouldn’t matter to Vil anyway and surprisingly, it’s Ace of all people who explains why.

Neige’s struggles might matter to his fans but at the end of the day if Neige cannot perform better than Vil, then that’s his own fault. There are many artists out there who have to deal with similar struggles but come out as phenomenal performers and yet Neige’s “best” basically consists of the twst equivalent of this meme. Precious, but cannot compare to all the sweat and tears Vil and his team were put through. 

There’s actually an interesting analysis floating around this hellsite about how Neige’s childish performance was actually an incredibly manipulative tactic and could have been intentional if he were a different character. I’m not gonna link it cause I don’t want to bring any heat to the op. But I will say that while I don’t think Neige intended to manipulate the audience with his cuteness, in the end, it did indeed work in his favor. And the fact that Vil thought to train Epel to weaponize his cuteness to defeat Neige indicates that he’s already no stranger to seeing such underhanded tactics in the industry he works in. In his beansday vignette, Vil mentions an actor he initially admired destroying one of his stage outfits. If Neige weren’t presented as so naive and twisted from a traditionally “good” character, his choice regarding his performance could be regarded as deliberate. Which is why Vil lamented that he and his team had been “outplayed”.

Back on topic, what I took away from this was that, once again, Vil’s hard work and determination count for nothing because of things he cannot control. Because he was born to wealth, because he didn’t have the same hardships, he doesn’t deserve the same consideration or sympathy as Neige. And his wealth and beauty once again put him in the position of villain to Neige’s hero. It’s a textbook case very common in media, like Sharpay opposing Gabriella in High School Musical. But what’s worse is that from all that we’ve seen of Vil, he could coast on his wealth, beauty and father's fame if he wanted to. 

Instead, he chooses to work hard and have his accomplishments come from his own merit. When anyone else in his situation could easily choose the opposite. And just from a personal standpoint, if I practiced day and night for a dance competition and ended up losing to someone under my level simply because they were cute and disenfranchised, I would feel extremely insulted. At the end of the day, Ace is correct and whatever struggles Neige and his team had, they were still inferior performers. 

And to add to this point, I believe that at some point Vil KNEW this even AFTER his OB. Despite his earlier anguish at never being able to perform innocent cuteness like his rival, once his mind was clearer, he was able to see that NRC Tribe’s performance was still technically better. He was able to see how the audience responded to Neige and still believed in himself as a better performer. I say this based on another scene earlier in book 5. 

Vil was undoubtedly in a very emotionally vulnerable place right after his overblot. He went to great lengths to conceal the aftereffects before going on stage to the point he collapsed as soon as he was alone. After going so long trying to hide them, his darkest, ugliest emotions were laid bare to his teammates and to himself. Manifesting in the worst way possible. And as a professional performer, if any errors were made, he would have been painfully aware of them.

And yet, despite having just dealt with the darkest moment of his life, Vil was still able to stand upon the stage until the very end and give the best performance he could. Against all odds, before a world that has wrongfully perceived him as evil and hideous for most of his life.

And despite knowing that Neige possesses all that he never can, it is strongly implied that Vil still chooses to vote for his own team. Meaning he saw the appeal in Neige’s performance and STILL knew that he did better. And I’d like to believe that even if Vil was aware of Neige’s backstory, he would have still made the same decision. It’s easy to be beautiful when everything is right and perfect in your world. But being able to smile even when you’re struggling and your heart is breaking is even more beautiful still. 

Sadly, Vil isn’t likely to realize this anytime soon and will continue to see his own mental struggles as not as valid or “ugly.” Now back to that original pin of thought, Vil will likely continue to believe that he didn’t deserve to win the VDC despite all evidence to the contrary. He’s likely to continue internalizing the false villainous image of himself as well. And for that we now must get to the crux of this matter.

At first glance, this statement doesn’t seem like much but when you look deeper, and look back at some of Rook’s own actions, this comes off as incredibly hypocritical and cruel. As we have seen from Vil’s backstory, he has dealt with untold hardships as well. But Vil’s anguish is more internalized than Neige’s and it’s very unlikely that he has ever really been open about how dehumanizing and hurtful his treatment has been. 

And from an outsider’s perspective, his problems aren’t as dire anyway. It’s just like Vil said, his life has been quite different from Neige’s. But mental trauma doesn’t know demographics and can affect anyone. The fact is what Vil has gone through is extremely traumatizing and comes from nothing beyond people wrongfully vilifying him for his beauty. Projecting their insecurities onto him from a very young age. It’s clear that what Vil has dealt with has fundamentally altered how he sees himself. 

But at the same time, what do you think would happen if Vil WAS more open about his frustrations? The dehumanizing effect and the bullying? The typecasting and prejudice thrown his way? And the feeling that nothing he does will ever be enough to break free from his villainous mold? What would happen if Vil were to be open about ANY of that? He would be mocked and shamed and perceived as shallow, petty and crying about nothing. Lowkey how many in the fandom already see Vil anyway. We as a society sadly don’t take mental illness as seriously as we should but when celebrities deal with it? It quickly becomes meme fodder and nowhere is this more obvious than on stan twitter. We are all guilty of feeding into it, whether we’re honest about it or not. 

Ironically, Vil’s mental struggles is one of the things that would make him more “relatable.” But the truth is that people would never accept that because society has a long history of trivializing the mental issues of celebrities because they seem so far removed from normal people. And then being surprised pikachu faced when they do something drastic to themselves. So Vil internalizes all of it because he knows he can’t be open about it. 

A person like him simply can’t be open about his hardships but HERE is the kicker: neither can Neige. He also has an image of perfection to uphold so it is likely he is also internalizing mental struggles of his own. Living and caring for seven others can’t be easy in addition to trying to grow his career. And if his deeper origins are anything like his Disney counterpart, how he came to live with the dwarves must have been traumatic as well. 

But here’s the difference: from Rook’s perspective, he is “better” at internalizing those ugly emotions than Vil is. After all, Neige is able to overcome all his struggles and still smile and not give hints to them, but when Vil finally buckled under all of his own trauma, we see what happened. 

There’s also the fact that since Rook and Neige attend different schools, Rook doesn’t have as close a seat to any of Neige’s more personal troubles. So it’s likely easier for Rook to project his own ideas of beauty onto Neige because from his perspective, he is perfect. He is beautiful. He is pure. Like the legendary singing princess Rook so reveres. He isn’t plagued with any of the ugly emotions that caused Vil to overblot. And if Neige DOES have ugly feelings or ugly trauma responses, Rook isn’t privy to them, so they clearly must not exist. 

I genuinely believe that THIS is what Rook meant when he stated Vil’s performance wasn’t as beautiful as Neige’s. I know he mentions another reason at the end of book 5 but in my mind, they are both one and the same. Whatever technical difficulties NRC Tribe had, they were still polished enough to garner enough votes that it was only Rook’s flawed ideology that sealed their fate. And throughout book 5, Rook is hinted at being aware of Vil’s internal struggles and yet still chose to stay silent. He frequently saw that Vil was struggling but tried to justify his silence by saying it wasn’t his place to interfere. 

But that is also untrue because we’ve seen time and again Rook is more than willing to stick his nose in Vil’s businesses. His labwear vignette is the most obvious example but there are plenty of others. In Book 6 Rook admits that his decision to go to the Isle of Woe was fully a selfish one. Leaving Pomefiore without leadership and potentially falling into chaos (the only dorm to have no clear leadership at all during the crisis) simply because he wanted to give Vil skin products that he really didn’t need. A few days without them wouldn’t do that much harm and Rook essentially placed Epel, Yuu and himself in great danger for a reason far more shallow than anything Vil has done in the name of beauty. 

He also admits that he would have been willing to drink the poisoned juice Vil gave to Neige for again, a pretty shallow (and extremely twisted) reason. If he’s willing to do that, he is more than capable of intervening in other matters on Vil’s behalf. And later in book 6, it’s revealed that Rook was originally a Savannaclaw student but made the very unprecedented decision to transfer to Pomefiore in part due to his fascination with Vil and desire to further study beauty under him. So Rook had EVERY opportunity to step in regarding his overblot. Even if Rook couldn’t be his “savior”, the fact that Vil would see that he at least had support could have gone a long way. 

But Rook’s silence is rather in keeping with his character and his own ideas about beauty. I find this quote very ironic based on how he and Vil are frequently misconstrued. The Pomefiore dorm leaders' views on beauty appear to be the opposite of each other. 

Vil can be extremely strict, harsh and can come off as critical at times, but he is never harder on someone than he is himself. He has shown time and again that he sees beautiful potential in anyone. And Vil is more than willing to share the spotlight with his NRC Tribe; build them up from scratch and give each of them the chance to show off their potential. Likely because he knows all too well what it means to be in the shadow of someone else. 

Even further, when we look at the dichotomy of a villain versus a hero, the main difference is how they respond to their personal pain. A villain takes their pain and says “the world hurt me so I’m gonna hurt the world”. While a hero says “the world hurt me and I’m not going to let it hurt others”. Up until his overblot, Vil has been the latter of these examples. He wants the best for those around them and while his methods might be difficult to understand, they always bear results. Vil can honestly see beauty in anything, even if he has to coax it out in his own way. 

Rook’s views on beauty however, all seem to be based upon the superficial and the evidence can be found in his Halloween vignette. There, he explains further how he grew to adore Neige and based on what he said, it sounded more like obsession than actual reverence. There’s also hints to this in his most recent birthday vignette as well. His ideas seem to be very fantastical, far removed from reality and so obsessive to the point that it actually affects his ability to be a good person. Such an obsession can sometimes make people oblivious to the world and in Rook’s case, often cause him to act out in ways that border on problematic. 

In his fixation, he stalks Leona and Jade, says some weirdly otherist shit to Malleus, harasses and assaults Ruggie, and places ridiculously high standards on both Vil AND Neige that rob them of their humanity. Rook saw firsthand how deeply Vil’s insecurities ran. He heard Vil cry and scream out how ugly he felt. He saw Vil’s anguish and despair firsthand and seeing all that, still chose to punish him because Vil’s lack of confidence made him unable to respond to his trauma in a beautiful way. Or at least in a way he could deem as beautiful based on his vapid description of the word. 

Rook will likely never be privy to any ugliness Neige has displayed so for him, the fantasy remains intact. And in chasing that fantasy, he betrays not just Vil, but his other teammates as well. Then has the audacity to try to justify it with bullshit ideology and sadly, because of Vil’s low opinion of himself, Rook succeeds. Vil holds Rook’s opinion so highly that he is able to take advantage of that and compel him (and the others) to see his point of view. And believe it or not, in chasing that fantasy, the NRC Tribe members were not the only ones Rook hurt. 

Neige might have been happy to have won but he was essentially rewarded for an inferior performance and robbed of an important lesson. One far more valuable than any “lesson” Vil had to learn. As mentioned before, even with all of his hardships, if what we saw in book 5 was the best Neige could do, that still means he is not as good a performer as Vil. If cuteness, nostalgia and warm fuzzy feels are the only thing Neige can offer, he could easily find himself struggling to remain in the entertainment industry as he ages. Not unlike many other former child stars in real life. 

Losing the VDC could have been a major wake-up call to Neige that if he wants to continue acting, he has to do better. People might not take him seriously when he’s still doing the cutesy bullshit ten years from now. But because he won, this will likely never cross his mind. Neige will learn nothing. 

Now before anyone begins writing up their comments about how Vil verbally stated that Rook was right, I’d like to bring up one final point: Vil agreeing with Rook was another trauma response. Internalizing Rook’s response because it is so in keeping with all he has been made to believe about himself, about Neige, and how it has all now been “confirmed” by his overblot. From his point of view, Rook has no reason to lie to him. 

But just because Vil states that Rook was correct, does not mean that it’s true. Despite being one of the more positive characters in the game and being twisted from a “good” character, Rook is just as morally grey as everyone else in the twst cast and just as capable of dubiousness. And this would not be the first time something like this has occurred between Vil and Rook. Once again, I bring up Vil’s labwear vignette. Particularly this exchange here:

Okay, so beyond the general tactlessness of telling Vil he’s gaining weight in spite of knowing how such a statement would affect him, what Rook is basically suggesting to him is that he cannot trust anyone but him. Not even his own senses. That for all of his perceptiveness, Vil is incapable of seeing himself accurately. Though he initially does not believe it, Vil eventually does accept  Rook’s statement despite knowing it was bullshit twenty seconds before. 

Later on, Vil mentions to Trey that Rook’s only crime is being too blunt and perceptive. It’s true that having another point of view is important at times, but the level of trust Vil has in Rook’s opinion can also be dangerous if he can convince Vil to doubt himself so easily. Theirs is an interesting dynamic but it also has potential to be extremely toxic and detrimental to Vil. At best, Rook gives him useful insight and pushes him to be the best he can be. But at worst, Rook contributes to Vil’s insecurities, enables his more toxic tendencies and his fawning of Neige feeds into his obsession to be the fairest one of all in the worst way possible. Rook can’t be completely oblivious to this. It would be such an easy thing for him to take advantage of Vil’s doubt in himself and value/dependency on his opinion. 

Which is exactly what Rook does. As much flack Vil gets in this fandom for being critical and harsh to others, he never criticizes someone harder than he will criticize himself. This is a person who has grown up in the spotlight and has had to maintain an image of perfection for most of his life.  A person who gave up one of his favorite condiments because of the damage it caused to his skin. A person who has so deeply internalized the villainous image people have projected on him that he wears it almost as a badge of honor. And because he holds himself to such a high standard and already internalizes a lot of toxic beliefs about himself, it makes perfect sense that Vil would agree with Rook. In his current way of thinking, Vil has no reason to disagree with Rook because from his point of view, Rook has always been honest to him and his overblot already proved he was unworthy of victory anyway. 

Of course Vil must be gaining weight. How could he possibly be objective regarding himself? How vain he must be. And how could Vil possibly be objective regarding his VDC performance and still vote for himself after such an ugly trauma response? He can’t trust his judgment, he can’t even trust his own senses. How arrogant and pathetic Vil must be if he can still vote for himself in good conscience after witnessing the pure wholesomeness of Neige Leblanche. Someone who would never overblot. Thankfully, he has Rook to humble that arrogance and tell him what he needs to know. Even if he’s tactless about it. 

I mean, Vil literally ran looking for a scale immediately after Rook’s comments on his weight. He probably added an extra hour to his daily workout routine the morning after eating the cake Trey gave him. I don’t believe that Rook is completely oblivious of Vil’s darker feelings, just as Vil has stated, he keeps too close an eye on him not to be oblivious. And he was astute enough to keep his infatuation with Neige a secret from Vil for nearly two years. This had to have been intentional. It honestly makes me wonder what Rook thinks of Vil on a more personal level. 

But regardless, the fact is, Rook was always going to vote for Neige and his explanation at the end of Book 5 was always going to be his reasoning. Vil’s overblot just gave him a more “legitimate” reason to do so. For whatever reverence he holds for Vil, it was never going to trump his reverence for Neige. The fact he brought all of his Neige photos with him to the training camp further implies that he was never going to be objective in this situation. And seeing Vil almost poison Neige probably further convinced him that Vil was undeserving of victory. 

That may make Rook seem duplicitous considering how positive and sincere he seems to be, but he’s still human. And truthfully, him voting for his bias is not an inherently bad thing. What makes him inconsiderate in this situation is openly telling Vil he prefers the catalyst for all his insecurities and overblot, while Vil was still grieving and in a very vulnerable place. Then justifying his decision as the correct one based on his own personal preferences, weaponizing that vulnerability to avoid being called out. Knowing that Vil wasn’t likely going to object. 

Even if NRC Tribe did win, it’s very likely Rook would have still brought up his vote to Vil and still convinced him it was undeserved. I would even go so far as to argue that Rook’s remarks about Neige early on in book 5 as well as Vil’s labwear vignette foreshadow the ending of book 5/start of book 6 far more than the fact that the huntsman betrayed the evil queen in the original Snow White. 

That coupled with a perfectionist like Vil looking back at their less-than-perfect performance is what compelled him to agree with Rook. If we take into account the idea that Vil still chose to vote for his own team afterwards, Rook’s actions and words probably further pushed him into believing in the idea of his inherent villainy and inferiority to Neige. After all, surely Neige Leblanche would never be reduced to such a hideous state. His heart is too pure, the fairest one of all and as different from Vil as night and day. 

If left to his own devices without Rook to influence him, Vil might not be so hard on himself in this case and would resent his defeat more. As he has every right to. But instead, Vil agreed with what was easiest and what made most sense based on everything that has happened in his life and all that he has been made to believe about himself. Why should he continue protesting when no one else will? 

Nevermind all the evidence we’ve seen of Vil’s tenacity, excellence and kindness. Why should he believe that he is the most beautiful one of all when Mira frequently tells him the opposite? Why should he believe in his own noble spirit when people openly say it’s not enough and that he’s not relatable enough to be a hero? Why shouldn’t he believe he is hideous when the entire world says it’s so? When even a large majority of this very fucking fandom mischaracterize him as such and agree with Rook anyway? 

Why should Vil question any of this?

And Vil will sadly continue to be second to Neige and will likely never question it. He will continue to internalize the toxic dichotomy between him and Neige and again, why shouldn’t he? After all, Vil is the evil queen to Neige’s Snow White, the Sharpay to his Gabriella, the Odile to his Odette. And Neige is the Madonna to Vil’s whore. Vil is not supposed to be the hero in this story and not even his trusted vice dorm leader has faith in him.

In discourse regarding the end of book 5, I’ve often heard it said that this was a “lesson” Vil had to learn in order to become a better person. I believe there was indeed a lesson to be learned from this, but not the one that many think. Since Vil knew from the beginning that trying to poison Neige was wrong, he didn’t need to learn how to play fair like Leona. 

Despite being a harsh leader, Vil was generally always fair with his teammates and again, as a former dancer, the way Vil instructed the NRC Tribe members seemed tame compared to some of the dance teachers I’ve had in the past. So learning to be less tyrannical wasn’t the lesson to learn either, like with Riddle. And part of what led to his overblot was realizing that NRC Tribe had been “outplayed” by Neige’s cuteness. But he still had enough faith in his ability to vote for his own team, so learning not to be manipulative wasn’t really needed either, like with Azul. 

No, the lesson for Vil here is that hard work is rarely ever rewarded fairly. And that his trauma is not valid because he was blessed in a way that Neige was not. He must always take second place to him because of his blessings while simultaneously ALWAYS being perfect. And because of his blessings, he can never express ugly emotions, he can never express anguish, and he must always, ALWAYS, take his mistreatment in stride. And God forbid if Vil DOES respond to his trauma in an ugly manner, he WILL be punished for it. He will ALWAYS be punished for it and by those closest to him no less. 

If Vil doesn’t like how they’ve treated him in his darkest hour, tough titties. It’s all his fault for not hiding his trauma to begin with. And he doesn’t even have the right to a moment to himself to cry. 

But that is where my analysis ends. Honestly this was kind of painful to write because it has made me fully realize just how much I’ve grown to disdain Rook after adoring him for so long. You all have no idea how hard I was hoping he would have some scrap of redemption in book 6. It���s really upsetting that so many people in this fandom look down on Vil or mischaracterize him but somehow don’t notice the glaring red flags in his dynamic with his vice dorm leader. 

Honestly, when I think about it, the ending of Book 5 is actually kind of brilliant, even if it’s also emotionally sadistic and lacking in other aspects. I'm not sure if that was Yana’s intention, but the fact that so many in the fandom tend to see Rook as the kinder one compared to Vil is very telling. 

Now I’m not saying that Vil is absolutely without flaws, Heaven knows he has many. As does every person in the twst cast. Vil is impulsive, domineering, harsh, difficult to please, overwhelming at times and extremely complex. But he is also helpful, perceptive, intelligent, genuinely kind and wants the best for those around him. Not for his own glory but for their own happiness and well-being. He is also clearly a deeply misunderstood and insecure young man, so I guess because of Vil’s faults, it’s “easier” to mischaracterize him. 

As for me, I find Vil’s character all the more compelling in spite of his harshness because I can see in him a true understanding of beauty that is both profound and attainable by anyone. If we are brave enough to behold it.

[nvrcmplt]

SHIPPING INFO. answer the following for your muse(s) so people know how shipping works on your blog.

What’s your OTP for your Muse(s)?

Being mostly OC based, to be faaaaaaaaaaaair - It's not something fixed in place but I can say with my whole ass that my ships with @intcritus and @avaere are most likely OTPs. Due to the length of time of knowing these two and just how deep our claws go into each other it's almost hard not to think about my muses that I ship with them / without them being mentioned, Muse-wise for sure. Like a part of my muses is made with them in mind, or they've made their corresponding muse unbelievably integral to my muses life and creation as a whole so it's like, yin and yang honestly. A few others are on that road too; eg; @asinusxdomi and @bonesofchaos

What are you willing to RP when it comes to shipping?

Everything to be fair, ain't no limitations when we're consenting adults, imo. Obviously nothing agreed on will happen and nothing plotted out for darker themes will be just like forced on people cause that's just shitty but also I know what I'm getting into when I go for those types of ship wants.

How large does the age gap have to be to make it uncomfortable?

I personally don't feel comfortable in reading about muses having any thoughts about children muses in that way and that's a hard no for me personally. I couldn't write it even to test the waters like I have with a few dark topics, ( dub con / non con etc ) It's just up there with those kinda of topics that I can't personally say 'yeah I'm comfortable with writing this for an experiment', not for me, so yeah long story short, no.

It's just common sense to not ship adults with children muses / characters, it's a big no thank you.

The youngest I could possibly ok in terms of just passing, is the 18-19 with someone in their 20 - 23 space - tops but even so, it still makes me wrinkle my nose a bit.

I think anything younger isn't something I'm looking for to read or write. Younger writers of that age can do what they want but like I'm 31, 32 next year, I ain't got that young-mind leeway anymore mentality and I cringe at the idea of making younger muses like below 25 to ship.

Are you selective when shipping?

Nah - I try to be to limit my needs to just swarm the dash with my shit but I ain't got much of a tick list or wall to climb over when it comes to wanting to ship w/ me. Like I make tags in a blink if I see us interacting a lot outside of just one or two asks a month thing. Like if I feel the vibe of actual interest towards my muses, then yeah I'm gunna return that interest if I get that spark and want to explore that dynamic ship in whatever way we're going.

How far do steamy moments have to go before they’re considered NSFW?

I will send you a BJ ask if you ask for it. So, whenever and whereever. I don't use readmores, so if someone finds sucking fingers too sexual, it'll just be there in the open. If we're going mating press on a Tuesday morning, so be it.

Who are other muses you ship your muse with?

/points at my mutuals./ These bitches suffer with me.

Does one have to ask to ship with you?

Talk to me? Lol, not hard. Forceship if you want, I'm game if we've got something going.

How often do you like to ship?

All day every day - you can't stop me and my mind.

Are you multiship?

Yes yes, I can singleship but that's only for 11+ year friends on here.

Are you ship obsessed or ship more-or-less?

Yeah, I ain't gunna lie. I just love having ships and tags and a continuous plot going with folks and sometimes you gotta bag the muse to keep it going. Even if it doesn't end up a lovey-dovey or we plot a break up, I'm all for it.

What is your favorite ship in your current fandom?

Me and my mutual muses. I am the favourite ship, thank you.

Finally, how does one ship with you?

Love me and my muses with all your heart and send them your muses first born, ofc. But mostly just communicate with me, I ain't gunna be able to guess through jokes / vague tags or the occasional meme, like full on talk to me, spam my inbox with proper interaction between muses, if you don't feel the same is being returned, talk to me in DMs or Discord. I can't read minds.

tagged by : @avaere tagging: All of y'all.

[gunkreads]

Probably a nit i'm picking here but I've noticed that when people's praise of a story annoys me, it's almost always because they're praising an individual element of that story that, in my eyes, doesn't fit into a cohesive whole or add anything to a larger narrative structure or set of themes.

I feel like it's very easy to find individual elements of storytelling--in my experience, usually worldbuilding details or elements of character arcs--that absolutely floor you. Pretty often, a story will have several of those elements, sometimes in a row! They don't make a story good.

What's the in between? Where do we go on the way from point to point? Are these compelling revelations or arcs presented with adequate lead-in and follow-through, or do they appear from nowhere? Do facts about the setting get insinuated before and after they're explicitly revealed, or are they presented to you and subsequently ignored?

The latter cases of these usually end up coming together to make stories that are fucking GREAT to talk about and reflect on, but a little painful to actually read, watch, listen to, or play critically. One of my all-time favorite TV shows is a prime culprit of this: Into the Badlands. It's a show full of the baddest ass ideas on paper that just don't get executed all that well. Shit comes outta nowhere, but when it's on screen, it's awesome! Then it's gone and forgotten. I love the show a lot, but it's just not stitched together well.

Another great example: Destiny. This game/series is infamous for having a story told almost entirely offscreen. There's a reason the Grimoire (effectively all the written background lore) is published as its own collection of books. The problem is, none of these amazing stories are delivered well-- and by "well", I mean "at all". It's a video game whose primary story is incredibly basic, but has a shitballs bonkers universe of history behind it that makes that main story goddamn insanely compelling! That history, though, is told almost exclusively through in-game, completely skippable text files. It's provided many a deep and mellifluous British youtube narrator with an entire decade long career of turning the written lore into narrated slideshows. But if you only play Destiny (yknow, the thing you're supposed to do with a game), that shit's straight up not there! It's certainly gotten better at times (Witch Queen), but it's a bad average. Hell, it's a bad median.

This isn't about ideas that conflict or are dissonant; I've found plenty of stories that pull dissonant ideas together into a compelling whole (cough cough Wheel of Time). This is about stories that can't deliver all those ideas in a cohesive way, and it's about how eager fans tend to be to praise a story that's a pile of shiny parts on the floor. You don't walk into the junkyard to see a pile of disassembled parts and say "What a nice car", you say "This engine could run, these tires have plenty of tread, this strut's bearings are still good". A story made of quality components is not automatically a good story. One of the best functions of fandom is to collaboratively assemble that car, though! We just need to acknowledge that the pile on the ground is not a car.

Here's my call to action: check the fucking glue. What's holding the good elements of a story together? How do these things tie in thematically to each other, and how are they juxtaposed within the linear narrative that makes those ties effective? Does the message of one good element overlap significantly with another, and does that overlap weaken or strengthen each element? Is the story using its medium well, or at all?

Enjoyment of a story has little relationship with how cohesive the narrative is; I think we all know that by now. I still think it's worthwhile to ask yourself whether your story is a good STORY or a collection of good IDEAS.

[rihabe]

hello! ♥

hiiii everyoneeee i am not new, this is carly, (bejoomi/benayoung) back with that new muse i was talking about when i dropped ahyoung, may she rest in piece. i believe riha is the girl muse that has Spoken To Me the most of any girl i've ever had, so i have high hopes of her sticking around and also breathing some much needed new life into my time rping! third time for a third muse is the charm right 😭

here is miss riha's about page that has everything you could hope to know about her! tbh i think some things have changed since i made it so i will be...reviewing it and updating it shortly. i'll give some info about her and some plot ideas under the cut as well, so defer to this for now! please like this if you'd like to plot w riha ♥ tyty i am excited!

ABOUT

riha was born in seoul, '00 liner, softest scorpio you will ever meet

she has an older brother and younger sister. her mom started having kids quite young. her dream was to become a musician but she had to give it up to be a Mom (and also a waitress, get that money etc etc)

riha's dad is a pro football (soccer) player, he was up and coming when she was born but is quite popular now

her family was actually normal for the most part [gasp] dad was a bit absent because he was more interested in his career but he wasn't a bad guy

riha's maternal grandparents took care of the kids a lot but grandma passed away when riha was quite young and didn't rly understand what was going on

dad put all the kids into Active Things as early as he could and mom fell in love with a Sports Guy so she was all for it too

riha got put in ballet but her brother was in Rough Sports and riha was like no. i wanna do that. if i bite one of the girls in my dance class will it prove i'm tough enough for soccer

eventually the parentals relented and bitch was and is so indecisive she tried Everything

she liked soccer most but ended up playing tennis, volleyball, and swimming most bc #misogyny

she was very friendly growing up, did quite well in school, but wasn't Spectacular u know

she really came into her own in high school when she tried out for the volleyball team and got on and became absolutely obsessed w it

she got her First Real Boyfriend in her second year and they were like The Real Deal and way more mature and deep than your average high school rls

riha loved him but then she got a crush on a girl eventually and had a meltdown because it Hit Different u know. The Lesbianism....

it wasn't until her last year of hs that she finally told her bf and broke up with him she was actually so heartbroken over it she cried so much but she told him everything (and that she is a lesbian) and he was an angel and understanding but clearly devastated and that made it worse

so riha decided to be very mature and run away <3 to uni in california KJLDLKJJKLDG

she was like hi my parents this school's volleyball team is very good and well known and they have a good kinesiology program i think this would be a great opportunity for me (:

and they were like ok sweetie if that's what you want to do

so she did it

with the power of english classes and gossip girl on her side she loved it there. and she made it onto the volleyball team but also played beach volleyball. probably got a crush on her beach volleyball partner. gay ass

she spent a lot of time on social media to keep in touch w people back in sk but also got into Fandom Twitter and she's a hot mess so her account was also a mess. her interests are everywhere. but she also made friends everywhere!

( illness tw ) in her last year of uni her mom got cancer and riha almost dropped out to go home and support her but her mom insisted she finish her degree so she did

and once she graduated went home asap

( death tw ) her mom ended up passing away last year, her health deteriorated pretty quickly once riha got back to korea

after her mom died she had no idea what to do with her life because she still loved sports but didn't know how to make that her career and he could go back to school and become a physical therapist or a pe teacher or something blah blah blah

but it didn't take her long to decide that she actually wanted to achieve her mom's dream of being a musician to honor her

in the meantime tho she's a personal trainer at her local gym! and she might pick up some other jobs too we'll see.

she is pretty much a Music Newbie, she learned how to play guitar from her mom and she always loved music but was never a singer or anything

she decided to go down the kpop path because becoming an indie musician or whatever seemed way more overwhelming than becoming a trainee LMAO like "ok all i have to do is get signed to a company and they'll teach me everything right???"

she is still a sports girlie. catch her at the gym even when she's not working but also on the tennis courts and at the pool and probably in a volleyball league and

she got a dog AND a motorcycle after her mom died to cheer herself up LMAO but it helped! she loves miso (the dog) and the unnamed motorcycle because she cannot decide on a name for it even though it's been a year or something

PLOT IDEAS

her ex bf. will be very picky about this but would love to have the plot!!

in the same vein, the first girl she got a crush on that gave her a crisis. this is more open but still important

i haven't said exactly where she went to school in cali so anyone that went to uni there, they could've gone to the same uni!

people she's played sports with. tennis doubles partner, co-ed kickball team, person that is annoyed because she somehow always manages to beat them to the best lane in the pool, etc

people she's training at the gym??

she can physically fight people. she is a 4th degree taekwondo black belt so maybe she absolutely kicked a guy's ass for you one time or something

alternatively you're obsessed w her bc she has a motorcycle and could probably be a stunt double she is a badass tbh

alternatively she is obsessed with you because you're a cute girl but it probably only lasts for five minutes because she's wishy-washier than mr clean

maybe a guy that she also thinks is really cute and is really fond of to give her ANOTHER crisis because she's not 100% confident in her lesbianism. it be like that sometimes....will also be picky about this but it would be fun!

she loves clubbing and somehow always ends up taking care of some drunk girl in the bathroom so there's that

she's a casual gamer too! but she's also very competitive! so it's like, she'll play once a week but depending on the game she'll get super into it and intense about it and then be like that was fun (: afterward. so fellow gamers? she's not that good tbh

would love for her to get mansplained to at the gym or something. and she can just be like wow thanks (: actually you're wrong abt that one thing u said teehee

plots related to her puppy miso!

she also runs and stuff so running partners, ppl she always sees on her running route, etc

okay i'm sure you've had enough of me now. oh my god. ok. please plot w me i'd be happy to brainstorm anything 🫶

[xxs4d-b4st4rdxx]

I have no idea why, but I have a sudden urge to talk about what Dr. Alto Clef is with in my head. It's probably because of that post of resent.

I'm going to be up and front with that this is more of me just rambling than a well-thought-out. I do better if I ramble with no form or idea where it is going. Also, I don't care if you think in any way is a waste or stupid. This is my blog, and I and do and say what I want, even if it's mindless rambling about a character or whatever else. -----

Well, to be honest, He does have a special place within my mind. It's greatly personal, I Rather not talk about it much, mainly because I rather keep the bad times behind me. Just know he has helped me get though some hard times in my life, even though he's a god-damn asshole of a character, lol.

Um… how do I start these things… Well first I must be clear that I have been out of the fandom he belongs in for some years now and so, much of what I view him is when I was really into it. SCP-4231 is a big piece to how I see him. I read that when it first came out, though I probably shouldn't have read it at that time.

Ok, enough of the rambling. For me, I view him as a bitter old man that real does not want to have anything to do with anyone. Which I don't blame. I thought of him being three different people with Alto being the last and Francis being the first, though the middle of the both does not really have a name He's just dubbed with Ukulele. Francis's GOC code name. With Ukulele being switch of dealing the stress of work and well their personal life. While Alto being formed when the incident happen and being the main for Francis to heal. Which never fully happen, Francis never really came back and only few years after it simply left. While Ukulele kinda linger not much anymore either being the next to fade leaving Alto be the last one left abandoned and the feeling that he had failed in sense. More bitter than anything in his mind left with the mess Francis had left him. Hope that makes sense in a way.

Another thing with the shipping of him and Kondraki (surprised I still remember how to spell his name). I like it though, I see it more of that Kondraki to him is a person that hang with and fuck around with once in a while, nothing more than that. I just see Alto being mainly a loner for that when he feels the safest at. I also do like the idea that he has amassed a large family of cat, those are his people. Furthermore, I like to think he thinks of himself as a cat as a way to cope with what he is.

The why I think he looks is pretty much what it most views him as. A white short fat man that doesn't have the greatest look, blond hair three eye colors, you know the gist. I have added on to that over the years with having a bad tan, you know what I mean. Have some numbers of scars from his year of living. A thing I also like is that he flip-flop in having somewhat short hair to have it long enough to have it braided. To be honest, I don't think he gives a shit how he looks other that his abundance of Hawaiian shirts, he's very prideful with that. His third eye I like to imagine he can move it anywhere on his body or hide it all together, another thing to fuck with people. Oh, Yeah, a chain smoker, of course.

Even with him being a shit person, I think deep with in him, he still cares about well… Francis's kid. Alto himself doesn't consider them being his kid nor being ever married. Though still cares about them.

I might be the reason he never just says fuck it and leave, to disappear, to live a life quietly without the Foundation being up his ass all the time. Maybe there's a different reason, who knows, he will never say, maybe he doesn't know himself either.

Do really think he's an anomaly of his own kind, being that most reality bender or what ever you want to call them, usually supper nova or simply disappear. Yet he's still there, well, depending on what stories you read. He does do either which is odd, potentially it's because of the circumstance he was in when there was still Francis and how him and his partner were like how two stars act when they are close to one another. Where the larger of the two slowly eats the other. Possibly that had some cause for it other than well... The trauma that comes with such an abusive relationship.

-----

Beyond this point, it is me rambling more about my old interest of realty benders than Alto himself. I was really into the concept of reality bender back in the day.

-----

As a side not I do compare reality binder with stars because of their life, cycle are really remind me of stars. With the more large hotter one having quite fast and destructive ends while the smaller and slow burning one much quieter ends.

Though, I'm just going to generalize things for the sack of understanding what I'm saying. But You want to go more specific, you can learn and use the lettering system that is uses to categorize stars. For example, our star is a yellow Dwarf and the spectral type G and with that will evolve into red giants. In turn, a white dwarf to finally a black dwarf where it does not have any more materials to produce energy (light). If you know the life cycle of a reality bender, you can fit it in within those terms.

There's also how some I would think some would bend reality some much they would leave tears within the fabric of reality, maybe creating a sort of black hole like some stars that are dense enough can form when dying. With what I said about super novas being how that is their max, their own unmaking. I think of it after math becoming nebula like in how mushroom producing spores, the matter with the disrupted reality creates others like as we are made of star matter someone can have that distorted matter that might form them as a reality bender. As they are not made with the same matter as others, but the same as another's demise for filling the cycle once more. Though like Alto, not all will meet their own destruction, with some living after that mass or simply never going through it. Leaving them much more stable in some sense. Though that does not mean they can't just go back to being a risk, which leave me to the point of why they might just simply disappear as a way to avoid that fate. As they might make their own small packet with in the fabric of reality, maybe that's how universes are made if you want to think of it that why. For me in star term I think of Alto a white dwarf star as something that is stable but has no risk of being destructive though much weaker than it was once before. That really does not matter with dwarf stars they live a very long lives, as like Alto they don't simply leave they stay for a very long time out live other stars, other reality bender without much change. In my head, I think he knows this, but I don't he likes it any. I think sometime he wished he was one that lives a short life that fades very soon after it was created.

To not stop on a sad note with the concept of cluster of stars like galaxy because I've already said what where nebulas as that is left over star matter which can in turn to make new stars. With galaxies, I see it as some reality bender might want to form groups, in a sense as a hive mind of sorts. Whereas in before they find their own space outside by themselves, this with a group can establish new one that are which much larger. Where the core normally being a black hole, their equivalent being a tear in reality. Which others get drawn to going from there leaving within the tare uses it as their own space allowing others to join with most leave to original for to become as one and in turn as a hive mind. With this being the case, they will hide that opening as to prevent unwanted out. Maybe this could be a way naturally how rips are mended in a way. Galaxies don't pose a threat as they have no more interest with their own reality from once they came, but they might have interest in merging with others like them.

I hope my word salad gave you some enjoyment. I really just did this for myself as a way to finally clean out what was left for my SCP days.

Thank you, for listening to my TedTalk, lol.

[luthordamnvers]

1 for Mayhem fic & 9 for DEBS :)

1.Start to finish, how long did it take to plan and write? Did you take breaks during the process?

mayhem fic... it just downed on me that i wrote 3 fics for that... but i'm going to assume supercorp one... (tho i'll try to keep it from my pov, if snowy wants to do the game and add her experience) The idea had been in the idea doc for.... a while. So when we received the go ahead to cowrite for the event, we brainstormed a few ideas about what to write, I shared said doc with @snowydragonscave and she was immediately drawn to the soulmate trope, as she always wanted to write one. Still, I was in the middle of finishing my supercortober23 fic (mind you, it was mid-January) And my brain was still on that.. Still, I wrote 2 proposed outlines, one that was a single chapter, and the 3 chapter proposal that we ended up going with. This was my first co write, so honestly, I just wasn't sure about how it was going to work, and I have anxiety, so that was interesting. Snowy had been my editor for a while, so I wasn't necessarily nervous about writing with her, but more like the logistics of it. (we have 6+hours difference, so the overlap where we could actually write together was somewhat limited even without accounting for writers block and such) So, once I finished sctober in late February, we immediately jumped to mayhem. We decided for the 3 chapter thing, and the 3rd one being the true cowrite as it would be both characters and with the 2 previous ones giving us enough time to get into their mindset. Snowy is a Kara girl (in the sense that in my humble opinion, no other author in fandom describes her and her thoughts the way she does, that is so real and with such deepness, but i digress) so I proposed she'd take kara's chapter, as we had previously been talking about how she rarely writes AUs, and how she wanted to explore gender identity with Kara and some other things. And I was perfectly okay with exploring Lena's side of having 400 soulmates. There was a bit of miscommunication at the start, but again, my first cowrite and i'm pretty bad communicating stuff, but once we got over that it was a pretty smooth sailing. We felt incredibly bad for @rustingcat once she was assigned as our artist because we had... like 20k+ words and they hadn't even met so she had literally nothing to draw, but a ~vibe. Also, this fic kept expanding, and expanding, and yet we kept wanting to add more stuff that we felt was important. Like I wanted to keep exploring Lena's dynamic with Lex, and I had to actively restraint myself for adding more scenes about her relationship with both Jack and Andrea (like Lena's petty ass was going to tell her about meeting Andrea's soulmate during their fallout, if you know you know) But I had to remind myself that this was a supercorp fic, and thus they should be the focus. We published on May 31, I was done with chapter 3 by the 28th, Snowy still wanted to punch up stuff... all this to say.... around 3 months. We didn't take breaks, necessarily, but sometimes you need to take a step back (on said days, i wrote/drew the dansen one) And i kept fiddling with other programs to write... I wrote a lot of it by hand. So then I had to transcribe... it wasn't necessarily an easy writing, but I loved the journey and I'm pretty proud of the result.

9. Did you get stuck at any point? How did you get past that?

DEBS: Absolutely. It was my first fic, so sweet summer child me, really thought they could jot down a chapter a week, because chapter 1 and 2 were, all things considered, really fast and easy to write. Then i got to Chapter 4 and I always envisioned it as "dansen's chapter" and chapter 5 would be "nia's/brainia's chapter", I didn't found Alex or Nia's pov as easy to write as I found Kara and Lena's... And then I had to remind myself that this was a supercorp fic (do you see a trend here???) So I combined the two chapters, but then I found myself struggling with (now) chapter 5 because that was the smut chapter and.. turns out, I'm not very good at that. There was a month between chapter 3 and 4. And 2 months between each of the next 2 chapters. My saving was actually writing a different fic between chapters... I wrote self indulgence here, and I wrote my first dansen fic, i got pretty consistent and it worked for me. And then I hit six months between chapter 6 and 7/8. I got blocked, I wrote my first supercorptober because of that, to try and get out of it (also bitching about it on discord, that was important). i think it worked... though it took me a while to get back into that fic, but I was determined to finish it... I still have not been able to read it... hopefully soon.

Thanks for asking, dear 💜 tho I'm pretty sure you already knew all of this.

[ask game]

[mr-laveau]

20 Questions for Fic Writers Game

Tagged by a darling, @autisticempathydaemon! Thanks for the tag!

Tagging @agentplutonium because I wanna pull some SH style interrogative shenanigans/lh

1 - How many works do you have on AO3?

Seventeen, not a lot but it's to be expected somewhat I suppose since I'm busy writing NeXus.

2 - What's your total AO3 word count?

64,509-Oh look I beat Lexi/j/pos

3 - What fandoms do you write for?

Redacted mostly, I have some unreleased Castle Audios fics, an unfinished JJBA SDC fic to finish and a Scott Pilgrim fic to start.

4 - What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

#1 is an Ironpanther Marvel Fic of Avenger's Academy I have not touched in forever called "How Tony Stark landed a king and how T'Challa landed a genius". It was fun tho cuz my hc of T'Challa being demisexual was really well received to my knowledge. #2 is "Spitfire", which admittedly is a good FL/Damien fic and people should read it. #3 is "Ghost of the Past", my Sam/SH fic where they both used to be roommates in DUMP. #4 is "Friends...Am I right?" which was a really fun Darlin/Sam & BE+Fred fic. Finally, #5 is "Moments That Flash By" which is a really good Darlin/David fic for my soul.

5 - Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I do respond when I remember...ADHD makes me do silly silly things like forget that stuff exists. I like comments and they let me know I'm doing s good job.

6 - What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Easy! "Shattered Glass Makes a Good Weapon" Gods, I love that fic so much. It was really fun for me to reach deep down and write Darlin and Quinn like that.

7 -What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

uhhhhhhh I dunno, probably a Marvel fic called "Crossing Buckies and Dotting Hawkeyes", I am a winterhawk girlie and I had fun writing that, others might think it's "Spitfire" or "Break time, Gorgeous" but subjectively, it's that fic.

8 - Do you get hate on fics?

If I have then I haven't seen it. I don't really engage much with fandom to care about hate comments because "haha, look at you getting mad over words about fictional characters kissing", like shut your goofy ass and move on.

9 - Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I have but I'm not releasing it. I don't feel compelled to do it-mostly cuz it's for me and I like toying with the idea in my head and the people of my current fandom are not ready for the depravity I could unleash.

10 - Do you write crossovers?

No? I have ideated one but I'm still not sure if I want to do it.

11 - Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Nope.

12 - Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nuh uh.

13 - Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Uhhhh no but I have ideated with Lexi about one and I have been too busy to finish the first chapter.

14 - What's your all time favorite ship?

My redactedsona/redacted men What? who said that? It's Darlin/Sam/David/Angel/Damien/Asher/Baaabe/SH/Milo. It's my ship and yes, they're all poly, yes, they're a network and yes, I am happy with myself.

15 - What's a WIP that you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

"Platinum Portrait", It was an old JJBA fic with my OC/Jotaro and I really liked how it was going. Dunno, we'll see how it goes.

16 - What are your writing strengths?

I'm good at dialogue and characterization as well as pacing(?).

17 - What are your writing weaknesses?

Gore, writing long fics, Dead Dove Do Not Eats (I wanna do those at some point with Quinn or Hush OR Porter OR OR OR Imperium Vincent) I like dark shit, idk what to tell y'all and I wanna get better at exploring darker topics properly in my writing.

18 - Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

Gods, I love doing it. If you've read "Break Time, Gorgeous" then I want you to know, I love you and it was fun as hell to write.

19 - First fandom you wrote for?

Marvel. Specifically it was my Ironpanther fic.

20 - Favorite fic you've written?

An unreleased Sam/Darlin smut fic where they fuck in an alleyway. I think it's fun.

[gendervapor14]

8. What song would make a great fic (to either write or read)?

9. How do you find new fic to read?

10. How do you decide what to write?

(if not answered already), and 37 & 38! Fanfic ask meme❤️

ooh hello!! thank you for these!! i did answer #38, but i'll answer #37 for sure!

8. What song would make a great fic (to either write or read)?

ooooo as a music nerd i love this question and i apologize for how longwinded my answer is XD i don't do many songfics or much song-related writing [*shoves the title of two fights for freedom under the rug*] but i do have a ton of playlists and songs that make me think of specific characters or fics. to answer this question, i'll just pick one called "Fever Dream" by Dirt Poor Robins. specifically the part starting just after the 4:00 minute mark. the lyrics make me go INSANE with this idea for a dark/horror dq bros fic where doflamingo realizes that corazon is just a false identity and he can't do anything to get his brother back and it drives him even more insane. these lyrics make me crazy Now here comes the liar (lion) Clawing at your door Drunk on the blood of your brother And he's back for more (apparently the lyric is actually "lion" rather than "liar", but i hear "liar" so therefore i declare it is "liar" for the sake of my own brainrot) imagine a fic where rosinante is the one psychologically tormenting doflamingo!! unsure if i'll ever get around to writing it, but it'd probably have a similar vibe to blood gone sour.

9. How do you find new fic to read?

i usually do a nightly prowl under the one piece fandom on ao3 and either filter by most recent fics with rosinante or bell-mere. otherwise i read recs that are bumped on discord servers, or stories friends write! i'm actually terrible at reading tho i don't read nearly enough. when i have free time, i usually use it to create.

10. How do you decide what to write?

excellent question. i make a list of priorities. sometimes it's disorganized lists on my phone, sometimes i use calendars. first and foremost are things with due dates, so zine work, or gifts for exchanges, birthdays or holidays. next i prioritize stories that are works in progress, but already posted on ao3. i hate having incomplete works posted on ao3, so i strive to get them wrapped up asap. then it's a rabid thunderdome of all my other wips and ideas all wrestling for victory for who gets to be created XD i'm constantly bursting with ideas i never get to work on, unfortunately.

37. Promote one of your own “deep cut” fics (an underrated one, or one that never got as much traction as you think it deserves!). What do you like about it?

i'm gonna go ahead and promote spitfire and ice because i busted my ass on this for the crackpair event and i was actually really happy with the result? i was assigned makino x kuzan, so i threw bell-mere in there too just to shake things up, and then i fell madly in love with bell-mere x makino and their flirty banter. it captured my heart in a way i was NOT expecting. i guess the tags aren't particularly interesting to most, so it's relatively unknown with only 4 kudos and 31 hits. but look at this!! “Hey, I’ve gotta ask you something.” She leaned over the counter once Makino settled herself and refilled the pitcher for the next round. “Would I still be wanted here…after hours?” With a tight smile, Makino rested her hands over the tabletop. “We’re closed for customers after hours. I need some time to tidy up the place.” “Right, right…” Pretty gray eyes wandered. “But in this situation, I wouldn’t be a customer.” With an amused chuckle, Makino folded her arms over her stomach. “What do you want me to say, Miss Bell-mère? Do you want me to welcome you to my private quarters upstairs?” That exposed chest filled with air. “I wouldn’t be against an invitation.” smh. well, at least i'm proud of it!

ahhh sorry i got so rambly XD i had fun answering these! thank you so much for the questions!! here's the list if anyone else has a question, or wants to reblog it for themselves!

[garunsdottir]

WIP Wednesday So, I was tagged by lovely @lord-aldhelm and decided to take part! <з

Please share your last sentence; or, if you don’t have one, share a plot bunny or idea!

If you follow my blog, then you probably know that I make gifs (mostly TLK & some other shows I'm currently watching), but I do write from time to time. Firstly, I share my wip gif project, which I hope to post this evening. Then I'll show something from my wip fan-fiction, but with a long ass explanation on how to perceive it lol

I. So, the gifs in progress:

Currently working on these two toxic boyfriends! It's gonna be a sort of 'web weaving post', so there are a lot of quotes and some paintings.

II. Now for the writing

The thing here is that I write in my native tongue, and, truth be told, I break a hella lot of rules. What is the point of knowing grammar perfectly if you are not going to butcher it later? I always play with grammatical cases and omit subjects (because the language allows it and the sentences are still comprehendable), invent weird-sounding descriptions, or let nouns drive the sentences. And when I write in English… Let's say it's complicated, as it is my second language, and I won't ever be able to convey my thoughts properly and with the depth that I was initially guided by. But yet, I've decided to try and exercise my brain a bit. So if you see strange grammatical constructions and incorrect word order - I'm sorry, but it is what it is, and sometimes I struggle to translate it.

background context: I write for small and strange fandoms, cause I love my characters and pairings. For instance, Ruby x Moody (awae), Warren x Layla (high sky), Jonas Baerb (RC: Psi), some modern hotd (mostly the greens), and Felix x Wendy (ouat). This super small part is from my wip 'Cheerful oblivion' in which Wendy is stuck in Storybrooke but is not being accepted by her former family because of how drastically she has changed on the island. Guess who is ready to open his arms in exchange for some fairy dust and help getting out of this shithole? Yep, Felix. Of course, they both had toxic connections with Pan. Of course, they both have an undeniable unhealthy attraction to each other.

***

Her tender smile, instead of an answer, slowly shakes her head from side to side.

This is her reality now.

Not going to high school, the iridescent chime of Grace's voice after classes, and coffee at Granny's. Wendy Darling doesn't wear skinny jeans, doesn't know how to use messengers, and, at seventeen (give or take one hundred years), doesn't know how to drive.

'Let's come to the table, or the food will go cold.'

The role of "mother"—Wendy has mastered it skillfully. Not exactly the best one, but impeccably needed. Once the one and only for boys on the island. Brutalised orphans demanded fairytales and medicines during the day, and at night they whined in her arms, writhing from screams in their own nightmares.

Wendy remembers everything: the first hunt, self-made spears, and arrows ineptly smeared with poison. The club on the shoulder of the great hunter, his sneaky, almost auricle-licking:

'The bird sings sweetly in the wild but looks much nicer in a cage.'

Prickly chills on the spine, aching tension in her calves—Wendy grabs the edge of the table, trying to keep her balance. Since then, she has also learned to run quite well.

From the living room, John screams something about an extra knife. The girl inhales the air into her lungs and raises her head, emerging from that deep maelstrom of rotten memory.

That's right, dinner.

The last one. The boys will be back in Boston tomorrow.

The food on the plate became cold because she had to tend to the pudding that was adored by the eldest as a child. The nervous laughter of the youngest, who is so eager to stuff himself with the second portion of the pie to make Wendy happy. The clatter of cutlery is annoying; the room begins to shrink, pressing against her temples.

A salt that John could go get on his own.

A thick mass of cream that seems too heavy to Michael, although Wendy took butter and milk in equal proportions.

Palms on her knees, right tops left one in an attempt to stop damaging nails and cuticles, shoulders lowered. Wendy's forehead itches at John's probing gaze.

'We'll find a way to get you out of here,' he says abruptly.

Michael freezes with a fork in his mouth. John's lips are a crooked line, a desperate attempt to make himself believe what he just said. He avoids her eyes, a torn scar on her lower lip, and an unseen habit of biting her nails.

As for Wendy…

Wendy'd just rather be left alone.

***

I don't know whom to tag, so if you see this and you want to participate, pray, do so!

[autobot-ratchet]

MTMTE 56, 57, and Revolution

MTMTE 56

and now for something completely different

“I know I'm paranoid. Contrary to popular belief, that doesn't mean I think everyone's out to get me. It just means I don't know who is and who isn't.” HEY. BIG SAME LMFAO not to gripe on fandom culture once again but y'all literally ruined my brain chemistry and I think it's fair for me to talk about it lmAO I know that not literally everyone who participates in fandom is an insane person who wants to start a harassment campaign against a complete nobody like me because it would be easy clout and no one would help me, in fact most of you are pretty cool, but I know someone will. Because someone always does. I've seen enough of my peers get hurt and/or die to know that someone always does, even if you think you're not popular enough. Like, I hope y'all realize what a fucking act of bravery posting all this has been for me lmfAO you have no idea how many times I've had to stop myself from editing out a hot take out of fear that even one chronically online individual might feel the need to punish me to protect the purity of the funny alien robot comic, including this paragraph

gfdsjkk I forgot Fort Max just fuckin kicks Prowl while he's in his alt mode so it just looks like he's kicking a police car. ACAB

oh god Outrigger's a fuckin youtuber lmAO

aww I do like that both Fort Max and Red Alert tried to get in contact with anyone they could when they saw everyone's farewell message, they still have everyone's numbers. Ooh except Chromedome changed his, or at least I assume Prowl's talking about Chromedome

ooohh right, this was another theory if I remember correctly, that Fort Max used to be Pious Maximus, like he got shadowplayed from being one to the other. I vaguely remember a panel I think way back in the Shadowplay arc of a dude in the background who looked kind of like Fort Max when Prowl and Chromedome found one of the institutes

casually thousand yard stares off into space at Sentinel's monologue about how Cybertron is now full of “mongrel Cybertronians” and he wants to “wipe the slate clean.” I wish life would imitate art would imitate life a little less lmfAO

*points at Prowl* lol but also Sentinel leave Red alone, he doesn't deserve this

MTMTE 57

ohh man here we go, last issue of MTMTE. It's not the end of the comic, it just changes names, but this still always feels like a milestone. The name changes, the main artist changes, this is absolutely a turning point and it always feels strangely bittersweet to reach it during a readthrough

“You're not one of THOSE, are you?” is still such a funny line of dialogue, truly on some care bears villain shit

still incredibly funny that Prowl has to use his table-flipping skills to reactivate the titan. The release mechanism was just. Conveniently table-shaped

man no wonder Red Alert got overwhelmed and tried to end it, poor dude's been out here playing 4D chess with his own brain for millions of years

fgshdjks Sentinel gets knocked into a pit by a bird and unceremoniously falls to his death. I've never seen anyone get more owned in my life

“You hate change. I sympathize.” “I hate endings.” “Same thing.” yEAH. YEAH THAT'S WHY THIS ALWAYS FEELS SO BITTERSWEET like yeah it's not an actual ending, but it is the end of certain constants that had been established (like the name, the main artist, etc) and like. That's enough! That's enough of a change for it to be felt! Not to get too deep or anything but it's normal to mourn for the loss of a life you're still living because it's no longer the same life

MTMTE Revolution

but before we move on, one more issue of MTMTE lmAO

god I completely forgot about Crankcase's online boyfriend

gfsjdkl Krok and Fulcrum trying to help Crankcase prepare for his date........ they're real ones

gOD THEIR STUPID HOLOMATTER AVATARS...

THEY FUCKIN BURIED HIS ASS god they are so bad at humans lmfAO

aww, Grimlock... shame he had to level a handful of cities to get his keepsake back but that's very sweet lmAO

fdhjks poor MP3