#I'll get over it. i always do.

[masked-and-doomed]

I can't begin to explain and translate the fuzz in my brain that hurts. Loving a character but barely grasping who they are. I'm looking at Ariels and Chaos and Faust and Conclave in despair.

[bixels]

Learning that fans hated Applejack and called her "boring" is crazyyy to me because I genuinely, unironically believe AJ's the most complex character in the main six.

Backstory-wise, she was born into a family of famers/blue collar workers who helped found the town she lives in. She grew up a habitual liar until she had the bad habit traumatized outta her. She lost both her parents and was orphaned at a young age, having to step up as her baby sister's mother figure. She's the only person in the main gang who's experienced this level of loss and grief (A Royal Problem reveals that AJ dreams about memories of being held by her parents as a baby). She moved to Manhattan to live with her wealthy family members, only to realize she'll never fit in or be accepted, even amongst her own family. The earlier seasons imply she and her family had money problems too (In The Ticket Master, AJ wants to go to the gala to earn money to buy new farm equipment and afford hip surgery for her grandma).

Personality-wise, she's a total people-pleaser/steamroller (with an occasional savior complex) who places her self worth on her independence and usefulness for other people, causing her to become a complete workaholic. In Applebuck Season, AJ stops taking care of herself because of her obsessive responsibilities for others and becomes completely dysfunctional. In Apple Family Reunion, AJ has a tearful breakdown because in she thinks she dishonored her family and tarnished her reputation as a potential leader –– an expectation and anxiety that's directly tied to her deceased parents, as shown in the episode's ending scene. In The Last Roundup, AJ abandons her family and friends out of shame because believes she failed them by not earning 1st place in a rodeo competition. She completely spirals emotionally when she isn't able to fulfill her duties toward others. Her need to be the best manifests in intense pride and competitiveness when others challenge her. And when her pride's broken, she cowers and physically hides herself.

Moreover, it's strongly implied that AJ has a deep-seated anger. The comics explore her ranting outbursts more. EQG also obviously has AJ yelling at and insulting Rarity in a jealous fit just to hurt her feelings (with a line that I could write a whole dissection on). And I'm certain I read in a post somewhere that in a Gameloft event, AJ's negative traits are listed as anger.

Subtextually, a lot of these flaws and anxieties can be (retroactively) linked to her parents' death, forcing her to grow up too quickly to become the adult/caregiver of the family (especially after her big brother becomes semiverbal). Notice how throughout the series, she's constantly acting as the "mom friend" of the group (despite everything, she manages to be the most emotionally mature of the bunch). Notice how AJ'll switch to a quieter, calmer tone when her friends are panicking and use soothing prompts and questions to talk them through their emotions/problems; something she'd definitely pick up while raising a child. Same with her stoicism and reluctance at crying or releasing emotions (something Pinkie explicitly points out). She also had a childhood relationship with Rara (which, if you were to give a queer reading, could easy be interpreted as her first 'aha' crush), who eventually left her life. (Interestingly enough, AJ also has an angry outburst with Rara for the same exact reasons as with EQG Rarity; jealous, upset that someone else is using and changing her). It's not hard to imagine an AJ with separation anxiety stemming from her mother and childhood friend/crush leaving. I'm also not above reading into AJ's relationship with her little sister (Y'all ever think about how AB never got to know her parents, even though she shares her father's colors and her mother's curly hair?).

AJ's stubbornness is a symptom of growing up too quickly as well. Who else to play with your baby sister when your brother goes nonverbal (not to discount Big Mac's role in raising AB)? Who else to wake up in the middle of the night to care for your crying baby sister when your grandma needs her rest? When you need to be 100% all the time for your family, you tend to become hard-stuck with a sense of moral superiority. You know what's best because you have to be your best because if you're aren't your best, then everything'll inevitably fall apart and it'll be your fault. And if you don't know what's best –– if you've been wrong the whole time –– that means you haven't been your best, which means you've failed the people who rely on you, which means you can't fulfill your role in the family/society, which makes you worthless . We've seen time and time again how this compulsive need to be right for the sake of others becomes self-destructive (Apple Family Reunion, Sound of Silence, all competitions against RD). We've seen in The Last Roundup how, when no longer at her best, AJ would rather remove herself from her community than confront them because she no longer feels of use to them.

But I guess it is kinda weird that AJ has "masculine" traits and isn't interested in men at all. It's totally justified that an aggressively straight, misogynistic male fandom would characterize her as a "boring background character." /s

At the time of writing this, it's 4:46AM.

[seventh-district]

Making Incorrect H:SR Quotes Until I Run Out of (hopefully) Original Ideas - Pt. 3 - Random Screenshot Edition

[Pt. 1] [Pt. 2] [Pt. 4] [Pt. 5] [Pt. 6]

[silusvesuius]

stuff heavily referenced from clive hicks-jenkins' art cus i've been rly into it lately 🥰

cute idea scribblings for the last drawing..lol

[meamiiikiii]

many mirabelle’s for mirabelle's birthday :]

happy birthday to mirabelle !!!!!!

[lilbeangrr]

Some h2g2 art from the past couple of days

2nd last features my friends as the emos <3

[missusruin]

ordered my first bjd the other day (!!!) and it probably won't show up for a few weeks/months, but do any doll owners got fave stores for clothes and wigs and whatever else?

[canisalbus]

I hope you have a lovely day today. ❤️

Thank you! You too! 🧡

[bumblingbabooshka]

S'chn T'gai-Grayson Family Memes

[nachosncheezies]

In defense of late-canon x files (including the revivals)

I was thinking about this poll after I commented on it, and I kinda want to be brave and say more.

Short answer to the poll's question before I go any further: If you're a new fan and a sensitive sort who thinks you'll struggle with your blorbos Really Going Through It and you really need a happy ending, I suggest you stop at the end of season 8. Do not pass go, do not look at spoilers. Disregard this post entirely, close the internet, and go look at something that makes you happy. (Also fuck every part of society that characterizes sensitivity as inherently weak and bad and some kind of personal failing, you are valid.)

That said, "quality" as a concept is entirely subjective, and the question of whether or not there's a decline in quality for any story is wholly subjective, too. In the case of x files? I'm not convinced there is a decline. I am going to be upfront that I haven't yet watched past season 8, though I am almost completely spoiled on events after that - and the reason I haven't watched yet is not because of how I know events are going to unfold, but simply because I don't want it to end!!! Ohh, the tension between "I CAN'T WAIT!!!" and "Nooo don't be over D:"

When I first came to txf fandom on tumblr and gradually became spoiled about what happens in late canon though, I was often left uncomfortable and tbh kinda queasy about it. As I said in my comment on the poll, the hate for especially the revival and IWTB, or to a lesser extent even seasons 8 & 9, is very well documented. But! There are other takes to be found here on tumblr if you figure out where to look, and my feelings have changed!

The thing is, I have yet to find myself in any fandom where there isn't a vocal subset of fans who dislike the story after a certain point. I am not joking when I say that no one hates the things they love as passionately as sci-fi and fantasy fans. In my experience, it often hinges on the extent to which a viewer has strong notions on where they would like the characters to end up. In particular with series where shipping is a dominant component for the bulk of a fandom, I have almost universally found that there comes some turning point in the story where "let them be happy you cowards" is the dominant view, and things that compromise the attainment of a degree of romantic stability and/or domesticity are, to many fans, annoying at best and despicable at worst. But! As one tagset on the linked poll said:

and I think for any fandom, that last tag especially is so so so important. (I think that's harder for people watching a weekly series live, bc you have so much time to analyze and speculate and dream before the next breadcrumb drops, but I digress.)

So why am I saying this and how do I apply it to x files? Well, I eventually found that there are also a subset of fans who find redeeming things right up to the very end and actually quite like the whole thing! The things that I had seen people rage and ventpost so much about honestly never quite sounded to me as "out of character" or "untrue to the story" etc as those same ventposts made them sound. And I've discovered I'm not the only one who felt that way. Do I love that the spooky squad had to go through all of those things? No, those poor guys D: Life is hard and they have been through so much trauma. But do those events and their choices make sense to me in light of everything that came before? Yes! And I honestly can't wait to see them fight to overcome those things, breaking, healing, always learning, always growing, always getting better.

So if you're wondering "where does it go wrong"... well, I'm a completionist, as many people who've answered that post are, but also my personal opinion is that I don't think it does go wrong. If you're new and interested in exploring why I've gone from "vaguely queasy" to "excited" about the whole thing, or want to maybe balance out the impressions you're getting about the later seasons before deciding whether or not you want to see the whole thing, I'll put a few blog names in the comments.

Final admission: even once I started feeling a little more confident in the possibility that "actually ok maybe I'm not crazy, maybe this all kind of is in character and does make sense", there was one big plot point that I was NOT looking forward to and I thought I would never be comfortable about. In hindsight, I think my discomfort came from the negative responses being SO seemingly universal that I hadn't stopped to let myself truly consider other possible interpretations on that point. (I mean my initial instinct when I first read about it was, why are we mad about this?? CSM is literally the most unreliable narrator in history???? it's obviously fake news?????? this must be either a fever dream someone's having or it's a misdirection ploy against whatever shadowy forces might still be lurking?????????????? but for whatever reason I guess I had halfway written that off.) Happily, just last month there's a new post-s11 novel out, and although reviews for the book as a whole are mixed, it seems to have laid the groundwork for resolving that plot issue in a way I think most fans would be broadly happy with. If you're interested in being spoiled about that and seeing how, I recommend searching #perihelion on @agent-troi who liveblogged reading it with receipts, scroll back chronological-style to the first post on the subject and see how it unfolded. (And never forget that Dana Katherine Scully is the queen of denial as a coping mechanism lol)

Everyone's mileage will vary. Each person can feel however they want! But for anyone new, I wanted you to know that the very many ventposts you might be seeing are not all there is to this show or its fandom. Some of us love it despite - or even because of - all the things that went "wrong". I think we just don't talk about it as much.

[blusandbirds]

eli moskowitz - "am i making you feel sick?"

[sparxyv]

I want you to know that I have scrolled through your page after coming back to HL brainrot, and I have deviously fallen in love with Mousey. Like seeing your artwork of him makes me so giddy to the point I swing my legs and twirl my hair. 😭🫶 I love your art and page sm, the only thing that I look forward to.

THIS HAS ME SO UNBELIEVABLY HAPPY.. 💋💋 LOVE U ANON THIS WAS SENT WEEKS AGO BUT IT MADE MY MONTH!!!

it makes me so ecstatic that people love my art AND my characters?? i swear it makes me feel like i'm living 13 year old lukas' dream 💜

ANYWAYS.. i see that the people like mousey 🙏 and mousey LOVES the people.

if mousey was able read these messages, he would be beyond happy.

mousey LOVES being loved, being popular, all of that.

that being said.. it would 100% go to his head.

he can't shove it in sebastian's face though 😔💔

[chalkrub]

first batch of "doodles"!! (I spent more time on them than expected)

ropka for @sharkflan

leanne for @gollygeesir

and GORILLA for anonymous :^)

these were all super fun to draw, hope these interpretations are okay!! and thank you for the nice messages <:^)!!!

[mymarifae]

i think the most important thing in the world is vbs being best friends who love each other so much and are super affectionate with each other like. listen to me:

- when toya hugs kohane he'll pick her up a tiny bit (a tiny bit is all he can manage. noodle arms) and she squeals with delight every time

- toya just really likes hugs in general. it's suuuuper common for him to just come up behind akito or an or kohane and wrap his arms around them and lean his head against theirs. hello and goodbye hugs with him always last a good 20 seconds because he won't let go sdjfjsnfkd

- kohane loooooves to tuck her hand in the crooks of her teammates' elbows while they're walking together. this way she won't get lost <3 sometimes she'll hold onto like, akito's elbow with one hand and an's with the other. it's very cute. and as vbs has grown closer, she's started to switch to hand holding. (don't tell anyone but akito's her favorite to hold hands with because he swings their arms as they walk and it's cute)

- also, kohane's hair tends to be messy because of her damn hats and this bugs akito so he spends a lot of time fussing over it. he'll just sort of...tug her closer and take out the pigtails and comb through it with his fingers. at some point she starts packing a brush in her bag to placate him. i like to think akito knows how to do hair because ena will sometimes make him do hers so after a while he stops just rebrushing kohane's hair and starts pulling it up in different ways... braiding it... etc... and he starts keeping things like hairspray in His bag. yknow. jic

- the hairstyling extravaganza extends to an and toya too. (i mean there's only so much akito can do with toya but he tries...) it's a calming thing for him - fiddling with his teammates' hair as they plan setlists or wait backstage. and having your hair played with is always nice <3

- i think shortly after teaming up an started giving kohane little kisses on the cheek. not as a romantic gesture - just simple affection! and after a while, she starts kissing toya and akito too. toya is always happy to lean down so she can pepper his face with little platonic kisses, but she usually has to wrestle akito. it's all in good fun and he'll always relent and let her kiss him in the end

- speaking of platonic kisses, i ALSO think that akito gives toya little kisses from time to time. it started back when they were still BAD DOGS. toya wasn't having a great time one night and after soothing him with a good sturdy hug, akito kissed the top of his head. it completely floored toya and akito blew up when he realized what he did. and they never fucking talked about it <3 but since toya didn't seem MAD about it, akito decided to stick with it and kept giving toya kisses like that. it's not common, and he ONLY does it when they're alone. except for when they make up after their little divorce arc in the main story. IGNORE the gunjo sanka mv and listen to me. they HUG after their heart to heart. and akito kisses toya's cheek. right around where he punched him

- but an's overaffectionate nature kind of rubs off on akito after a while. so he becomes less stingy when it comes to kisses and starts giving them to kohane and an too <3

- they lean against each other while sitting like kohane might cuddle into toya's side or an goes and lays her head on akito's shoulder

- and they have sleepovers and they fall asleep comfortably tangled up together (or not comfortably. at all. seriously cuddling while sleeping can get so uncomfy but it's worth it to be so close to someone you love). ken's taken quite a few adorable (and sometimes really funny) pictures of all four of them passed out on piles of blankets and futons. just dad things

i could go on forever it's just. platonic affection is so important to me and it's so frequently Ignored in fandom spaces. and in the case of vbs and the prsk fandom specifically, there's a tendency to separate vbs into akitoya VS anhane. which is so 💔 because the whole POINT of their story is that while they started off as separate duos, that's no longer the case! they've become such good friends. they're inseparable.

like even jokes about akito and an being "wlw and mlm hostility" are starting to wear on me because... they're friends, guys. they're incredibly close. akito is always looking out for an and is right by her side to support her through all the shit she's currently struggling with. there's no "hostility" present in their relationship. like, if you actually look at the game's text, an... rarely teases akito. the person who teases him the most is actually toya but you know... whatever... gotta reduce an down to a mean lesbian amirite... completely ignoring that she's one of the kindest characters in the whole game...

idk. i juuuuuust wish that this fandom wasn't so defensive and obsessive over shipping akitoya and anhane (mostly akitoya while anhane is a second thought but YOU KNOW) because it results in so many people watering down vbs as individuals And as pairs - because all they care about is shipping. like i promise that the other dynamics in vbs are worth exploring (both platonicallyand romantically but too much of this fandom still feels threatened by m/f vbs ships). and hell, explore akitoya and anhane on a platonic level, too! don't just jump to shipping them because teehee boyxboy and girlxgirl. take the time to understand what draws them together in the first place

i love friendship. i love when friends outwardly express their affection for each other and it doesn't have to have any romantic implications. can we talk about friendship for once like this game is literally The Ultimate Friendship Simulator feat. Hatsune Miku

[murderbeast]

wip titled ‘slinker’

[merlins-strawberriesandroses]

TO be honest. I don’t understand what it means when people say Merlin was Arthur’s bane. Mayhaps I misunderstand but. Arthur was a bit of an assassination magnet (not to mention all those magical creatures and bandits... so many bandits), and Merlin actively prevented Arthur's death for years, which would have occured without him anway in the very first episode. I can see why one might argue that Merlin was just delaying the inevitable, or that he didn't succeed in keeping Arthur safe until Arthur could enact the golden age, but certainly I don’t see how he could have been Arthur’s bane.

Also, it’s implied in the last episode that the golden age does occur, but under Guinevere. Which makes sense as she knew Merlin was the sorcerer and that she was pleased about it (and I recall it was confirmed in interviews), so I also don’t follow the twin train of thought that Merlin was his own bane or even Camelot’s. Camelot was already bane-d(?) under Uther. But partly because of Merlin's steady friendship, Arthur matured into a king who was kinder than his father. He also actively sought magic's aid on multiple occasions, so he knew magic had potential for good (like healing his queen) without Merlin needing to tell him about his magic.

I don't think it's fair to say Camelot's laws on magic remaining relatively static was because no one close to Arthur came out as having magic. There was still much risk in that, and for Merlin a lot at stake, not just his life. A law change was still possible (and almost seemed to be set up that way) without Arthur needing someone he was personally close to having to do the work to humanize it for him (in the sense that the episodes with the druids, the druid boy with Elyan, and the dolma seemed like they were pointing to a law change because Arthur sees the diversity of magic and those who have it).

At worst Merlin’s efforts didn’t change the status quo, but we do have things indicating that they did. And Merlin was not single-mindedly serving Arthur at the expense of everyone else. He saved Camelot as a whole multiple times. He was also very willing to stick out his neck for many others even during the height of his anxiety and agitation in season 5. (Also only being slightly silly when I say this, but he was also THE wingman for Arthur when he was getting with Gwen, so in a way Merlin’s help led to their courting being a success and thus contributed to her being in a great position to change the laws. so personally I give points to Merlin for that). Most of the decisions centering Arthur's safety seemed to stem from the fear that Albion would crumble before it began if Arthur were to die, so he tried his best to prevent that from happening in any way he knew. (Like, when Arthur is dying, Merlin asks "So I failed?" regarding the whole golden age thing, which I think is telling that the prophesy and his role in it was still VERY much at the forefront of Merlin's mind).

And this is a digression but I know people think Merlin should have done more for Camelot, or for folks with magic (like, as a revolutionary or something akin), which I understand but no one reached out to network with him really? It'd require resources, people (always confused why there weren't a whole bunch more folks offering Merlin material/intellectual/emotional support if they thought he should be the one to bring about the golden age. all he was told was that the forseen way it actually happens succesfully is through Arthur), time (I doubt it’d have been much of a ‘quicker’ way necessarily), and incredible planning + foresight if it's meant to be something that works out effectively + long-term. Okay I think I've digressed enough now. This is a whole seperate thought that I don't think I'm gonna do any justice here lol, and I'm already rambling, so I'll stop now :,)

But anyway, in terms of being his own or Arthur’s bane, we know Arthur will return, and we don’t know how Merlin spent his years. His magic can play with time and maybe he learns how to control that, or he could have entered a stasis like in various legends, etc etc etc. And I mean it is tragic on many levels, and it’s sad we didn’t see Arthur’s arc completed, and that Merlin sacrificed so much for a goal that didn't get much acknowledgment by the show at the end, but still. I don’t think Merlin was Arthur’s bane, or Camelot’s, or his own.