#I'd like to come up with more clear ideas and art for this maybe tomorrow

[my-gf-is-kazuichi-soda]

That's a good question! I'm not "answering" it yet bc I feel like I can come up with something later (probably tomorrow) and then write it better than I can right now (bc I'm tired), but as of right now Zoey does not have one.

(Update: now answered here)

And yeah, the Maid to match Servant thing does sound super cute.

--

Some more thoughts below (I accidentally wrote a lot)

Zoey, being the Ultimate Cartoonist...this feels similar to Mahiru's "I take evil pictures (of Junko's atrocities) heheheh" thing.

Though, I could go at it from a more of a "storyteller" thing of crafting stories that give people despair. Maybe Junko and Zoey write depressing comics together about the Ultimate Despair spreading around the world with pointless silly Monokuma short stories sprinkled in (like those segments in the games where Monokuma tells a nothing-story in between chapters. I liked most of those.)

I've thought about how much in common Zoey has with Junko (I never thought I'd say that, but it was something I realized when writing Zoey and Monokuma's interactions), and I think they would be friends in an AU where they were on the same page about both being in despair or being not in despair. Though, when Zoey's not in despair, her stubbornness, intuition, grudge-holding, and hero complex can either make her a manipulatable tool or make her a pain the ass and potential threat who's a few steps away from (accidentally or on purpose, depending on how Zoey feels about Junko) exposing the entire plan by loudly asking questions at the worst possible moment or by refusing to do something she has a "bad gut feeling" about. So, Junko might want to keep Zoey distracted with something else to keep her at a distance until she can be totally mind-controlled.

Not sure yet about how Zoey and Kazuichi would act together in a remnant of despair AU, but I'd like to think that even in darker AUs they would have to meet eventually (which means they'd also fall in love eventually).

An idea I had once (this was before I decided to write Parallel Play in a non-Ultimate Despair AU): Junko met Zoey, they became friends and Junko said she would help get her out of her shell by asking Zoey to find others to start a club together, and Zoey (who was seeking out a space with just one person she could talk with instead of a group)... she found Kazuichi working, and decided to give her a pamphlet to this club...which means that Zoey was the catalyst of Kazuichi getting brainwashed and falling into despair. Zoey learns about this when they get their memories back and feels awful about it, to which Kazuichi tries to comfort her saying that at least it means they both survived the apocalypse (even though they also caused it 💀), and that Kazuichi would rather have met Zoey instead of never meeting her.

[builtbybrokenbells]

Hi t!! I just read Reaching New Heights and I've never liked a fic so fast. Bless that anon for sending the ask and thank you for making it come true in the best way. I have to admit I'm a sucker for soft virginity/first time trope, maybe because it's something I've never had. It's so soft and sweet and smoking hot all at the same time and the epitome of fictional men written by women (I mean this as a compliment and I'd choose fictional men over men in real life any day, duh) it instantly reminds me of the episode on Unwaxed podcast where Emily Morse talked about how some so many portrayal of sex scenes in movies and stuff aren't realistic like women actually need time to properly warm up and it's just not realistic for them to have an orgasm in two minutes in an elevator or something. I mean we can all dream in fictional world, but it's just awesome from time to time to read something that has the proper build up (the part with the kisses rather than just rushing into it....top tier writing) I saw dee reblogs it with the tag "men take notes" and I 🙌🙌🙌 I am on my period and anxious as f^ck because of a task I have for tomorrow but coming cross this piece of art feels like a kiss on the forehead. bless your heart for making a stranger feel so soft, mushy, and happpy that she cries a little....THANK YOU SO MUCH. (I am sorry if this is long and TMI, I'm sorry if this sounds awkward....lqiudghxiy I just really need to say it out loud because it's just soooooo goooooood)

Hello, lovely 🤍 let me just say, your words have kept a smile on my face all day long. I wanted to take a minute to formulate a proper response, because you have no idea how appreciative I am for you!

I have also found myself enjoying the virginity/first time trope, and I tend to believe that it’s because my first time was nothing short of awful (and that’s putting it… lightly) and I have spent my entire life dreaming of fictional men that would treat me better than real life men.

I was so nervous to post it, as well as Picasso, which I posted some time ago, now. It was my way of airing out my desire for someone who treated me well, yet I still recognized that first time fics are very difficult to write well. I also fear that with a request like such, that I cannot capture the readers vision as clear or well as they would like me to.

As I posted it and read some messages and comments, I realized that there’s a lot more people who have had the same types of experiences and feelings about the topic than I originally thought. To hear that this made you feel such a way makes me incredibly happy, and I cannot express my gratitude enough.

As for the details, sometimes I feel like it’s easy to forget the build up in lieu of the main event. Especially when there’s so many fics out there that are hot, and exceptionally well written. I hate to say that I did end up cutting out quite a bit of stuff from the main draft, and now that I read this, it makes me feel as though I should have left it. To know that was the part that stuck out with you makes me incredibly happy, because it stuck out to me, too. (I swear I could write a novel about good foreplay and only that, because that’s how much it means to me.)

Good banter and build up are just as essential as the main event to me while creating a scene, as well as a relationship to the story. In a world where it’s normalized for men to leave women unfulfilled, I think it’s quite important to focus on that more than anything else, especially in these types of fics.

I am so grateful for your kindness, and for everyone else who took time to leave a comment. Messages like this and people like you are the reason I come on here and share my work, and I would not be here without your support. Thank you so much for brightening my day, and I’m so glad that my writing could bring you so much joy.

I hope your task tomorrow goes well, and thank you again for being my shred of happiness for the day 🤍

[recurring-polynya]

Writing/Art Update 4.30.2024

I'm tired!!

That's not related to anything, I just wanted to get that out there: I'm do not have a lot of energy right now.

I am taking requests right now, and I thought it would be good to post an update on how that's going, because I'm worried that people will think I am not working on them, but I am very much working on them. I think that's because a lot of times in the past, when I do requests, it's been for a specific event, like Renji's birthday, where I have a deadline and a lot of pressure to get things done. In this case, it's just that I have a list of prompts in my inbox to work on, where at least someone will be happy to read it when I post (hopefully 😂) I have posted one already, and I am at work on the second. It's about 1200 words right now, and I'd say it's 1/3-1/2 done. It's going kinda slow. That's not to say it's going bad--I have good direction on it and I've been making progress on it, it's just not, like, flowing from my fingertips. It's a set of characters I don't usually work with, which is fun for a change, but also it takes me like 9 times longer to write anything that doesn't have Renji in it. The way I figure, if I can do about one of these per week, that should be reasonable.

People are still welcome to send in requests! I will say: - I have gotten lots so far, so please don't feel like you need to send me a pity request, but if there's something you'd like to see from me, hmu, who knows, worst case is I don't write it - Quite a few (like, at least 3???) are things that I already have planned as part of larger works, and I'm not quite sure what to do with that 😂 I guess I'll just say that if you feel like you sent in a really good one and I ignored it, just be patient, it may come up eventually. - Lot of funny/cute type ideas, which is fine and it's like, the main thing I do, but also please don't be afraid to send in something more serious or angsty, I do like to do that kinda stuff, I just don't always have ideas (they never seem to get as many stats, so maybe other people just don't like my serious stuff as much, but let me have fun 😂) - Maybe b/c I turned anon asks back on, I've been getting a fair number of (what seem like) regular asks, rather than fanfic requests, but tbh, sometimes I am not sure, so please try to be clear if you want a fanfic about it, or you just want me to answer your question, otherwise you get what you get.

In art news, I keep meaning to draw and then not drawing!! I need to fix this! May is tomorrow, so there is a new set of art prompts, which I am more excited about than the April art prompts. Also, we watched the Halloween episode last week and my daughter really wants us to draw Pumpkin Ghost Orihimes and I would like that too. I will try to get my shit together! We'll see!

[batboyblog]

Wha your an inspiration! Also sorry I meant to say what things will you see in your lifetime enter the public domain bsbsbhsbs should have said that! Anyways I'm happy to see the final stuff from the 1920s finally be layer to rest and enter the public domain by 2025! Also should more people be hyped and anticipated for the Steamboat Willie (1928) or The Opry House (1929) in your opinion/thoughts?

Anyways, what your top 15 most anticipated and hyped things whether it be cartoon/film, book or something else that will enter the public domain? Wah so sorry for so many questions dvbdbdd qwq

Things I'd like to see in my life time? well I did bring up a New Hope because I could live to see that enter the public Domain, I'd be in my 80s so it could happen. I'd love to see the end of the 95 year copyright, which would be the same year as Star Wars, in general I'd love for the law to change to something more reasonable because right now.... when the 95 year copyright term runs out we could be looking at works under copyright for well over 100 years, for example George Lucas is still alive if he died tomorrow by my math Empire would be under copyright till 2099, since he's a healthy (as far as I know) man in his late 70s he could live another 10 or 15 years (maybe even 20+) expending the term deep into the next century.

On Mickey Mouse, thats a tricky question. The Issue is the difference between Trademark and Copyright. Copyright is ownership of the whole idea in all contexts, while trademark is limited to images and words (or phrases) used for marketing. SO for example you could do a "Who Framed Roger Rabbit" style movie and have Mickey (and/or Minnie) show up. However Disney still holds/will hold the Trademark because those can be renewed endlessly, so you wouldn't be allowed to use his name in the title, or say his name in the trailers or any marketing. My question and I don't know is how much of the image do they own? could you use him in Steamboat Willie form? I would guess no, I think you'd be barred from using his image in marketing but I'd also guess you'd have a legal fight with Disney trying to use trademark as copyright.

in any case I think... there's a big big Disney community and I'd guess the first effect would be fan art and unofficial merchandise blowing up big time.

top 15? hmmm well I'll stick to stuff coming out in the near-ish future, I'm very unlikely under current laws to live to see Harry Potter become public, but that'd be a trip to see.

The Hobbit (1937): thankfully Elves and dwarfs were not made up by Tolkien so fantasy can basically steal his ideas freely but it's very clear we've all been playing in JRR's sandbox since at least The Lord of The Rings of not the Hobbit so releasing this out into the wild will be amazing also hobbits which he did make up (and also Ents, and the Uruk-hai) to finally be allowed to appear in all the fantasy literature that has elves and dwarfs.

The Wizard of Oz: Of course the original book by L. Frank Baum has been public for years and years and nothing stops any one from trying to make another one, and some have. See "The Wiz" and also "Wicked" but the 1939 movie remains a triumph and a huge piece of cultural history, I'm unsure what could be done with it, but you know

Superman, Batman, Robin, Wonder Woman, Captain America: I mean this should shock no one that this is something I want to see. But I think... Superman and Batman in particular are SUCH a universal part of our culture, you can stop randos on the street who have NEVER read a comic and say "what is Batman's name?" or Superman and they can answer, they can tell you Superman's powers. I think in terms of universally known and recognizable pieces of pop culture... I mean nothing else under copyright today is as big of a pop icon as they are they are as part of the basement of our popular imagination as Dracula, or Santa.

I'm sure a lot of other stuff but I think I've gone on long enough

[dearcraziness]

Chapter 47.

An interesting new sunny day. It was very warm outside the window, bright rays of light gently touched the foliage of trees, bushes and other plants. The wind only occasionally stirred them, soon everything was quiet, and the soothing voices of birds were heard.

Everything was fine at home with friends, too : after breakfast, everyone began to do various interesting things : Bendy watered flowers in the garden ; Lara painted landscapes ; Alice sewed a new outfit ; Boris disassembled mechanisms.

Soon Bendy came into Lara's room. He saw her drawing and said, "Oh, Lau, what a wonderful landscape you are creating!... The colors are perfectly matched, and the plants are so neatly drawn..."

"Thank you, Bendy... I'm almost done, I only need to sketch a few more trees..."

"If you want, we can draw together... Or do you want to go to lunch now, princess?..."

"Later..."

"As you wish, dear... I think today I'll paint your stunning portrait again... Although you are much more beautiful in life than in drawings..."

"I like your art, your fascinating style..."

"Thank you very much, dearest... You're perfect in everything... By the way, sunshine, I wanted to ask..."

"Yes, cutie?..."

"Would you like to go to a magical island tomorrow?... Of course, we're going on a trip with friends, I think they'll be happy to join us..."

"No doubt... Which place place will we visit?..."

"To the island of Bright and Mysterious Wonders... Do you remember, we recently read a little article about it?... Such an island is definitely worth a visit..."

"I guess you're right... Of all the islands we read, this one seemed to me the most miraculous..."

"We should spend a few days there... Maybe even about a week to see as many sights as possible..."

"Then we'll begin our journey..."

"Our friends will definitely be interested in the idea of another adventure."

Soon pals gathered in the kitchen and, after lunch, discussed their joint plans.

"By the way, about tomorrow-" Bendy began. "Lara and I decided to visit one incredible, it's called the island of Bright and Mysterious Wonders and, judging by the name, we'll find a lot of miracles there..."

"Sounds good..." Boris answered, looking away. "Then today we should collect necessary items for the trip..."

"Also stuff for leisure," Bendy added. "For example, collections of sudoku, books..."

"Sketchbooks..." Lara smiled.

"Oh, and I'll take an embroidery kit..." Alice continued. "I'll sew there, just like at home..."

"This is all great, of course, but we'll need to explore the island..." Boris remarked.

"We will, don't worry," Bendy assured the mechanic. "And now - let's go pack up!..."

The magicians left the kitchen and went to their rooms. Boris folded some of his appliances, Alice put a sewing kit and several magazines.

"Only the supplies we'll need for the hike and some clothes have to be packed..." said Boris.

"And we're free..." the angel replied.

"Wow, Alice, how many magazines did you put in... Are you going to read them all on the island?..."

"If I have enough time... By the way, you also packed a lots of devices..."

"You're right, but I won't disassemble them as often as here... Pumpkin, we could read some of your magazines today..."

"Okay, I'd like to see an article about traveling on the islands..."

"But you've been reading it recently, dear..."

"I really like it..."

"Okay, whatever you say..."

Boris and Alice put some things in the rucksack and began to read. The magazine was really very entertaining and they carried away by reading, not noticing time passing by...

At this time, Bendy and Lara almost put everything together, talking about their views of the island.

"I think there'll be a lot of unusual plants and animals everywhere!..." Bendy began. "The landscape will fascinate with its impressive view, we'll walk along the crystal-clear coast, the palm trees and bushes..."

"And so it will take a long time..."

"Until evening comes, then we'll return to have dinner... It's going to be so great..."

"And so nice..."

"Good to know our opinions are quite similar, sweetie... I really hope you' like the island..."

"I think we all will..."

"You're right, dear, that's exactly how it will be... With you, I'm happy to go to any place, even to the end of the world... Starlight, if you want, we'll solve a couple of sudokus now..."

"I'll be happy..."

"Let's get started, tulip..."

Bendy took out the magazines, the magicians began to fill in the empty cells. The devils soon finished, Bendy cooked dinner, friends discussed tomorrow's adventure. After that, they returned to their rooms and engaged in calmer activities.

"Honey, don't you also think tomorrow will be a wonderful day?..." Boris asked Alice, who was looking into the distance.

"Of course I do..." Alice replied. "We're going to have a great time..."

"And so it will be... Anyway, I think it's time for us to go to bed... Sleep well, my angel..."

"Good night, my mechanic..."

Boris bent down and kissed Alice on the forehead. She smiled, as did he, hugging her. Then they went to bed and had marvelous, brilliant dreams...

Bendy and Lara, having finished sudoku, also decided to go to bed. Bendy put the magazines back in their place, sat down next to Lara, hugging her. The imp smiled, still looking down. Bendy looked at her tenderly, peering into her beautiful eyes...

"Lar, I think we'll spend a little more than a few days on the island to explore it better... But if suddenly is smaller than we expected, we'll go to another island!... And explore the landscapes of both..."

"I think it would be best... But if the island turns out to be big, it'll be enough for us..."

"You're right, berry, in any case, we'll have an unforgettable trip... You probably want to sleep now..."

"So do you, I suppose..."

"Yes, but if you wish, I'll be happy to talk with you some more... Although, tomorrow we need to get up early..."

"I think it's better to go to bed now..."

"Sweet dreams, my little demon..."

"Good night, my big demon... Tomorrow will be so exciting..."

"The adventure on the island will certainly delight us... Love you very much, Lora..."

The next morning, friends woke up quite early. After breakfast, they talked for a while and returned to their rooms. Bendy took the rucksack, he and Lara went out into the corridor. Soon Boris and Alice came out with their backpack. The friends went outside and watched the outstanding landscape in the garden for a while.

"What a wonderful day!... " Bendy noticed and smiled. "However, it's time for us to go to the island."

The others agreed, the musician snapped his fingers - magicians teleported immediately to the right place.

The island struck and pleasantly surprised guys: palm trees were absolutely everywhere, flowers of various colors and sizes surrounded them, the shore was crystal clear, soft yellow sand shimmered brightly under the rays of the sun, huge clouds floated across the light blue sky, the voices of birds flying nearby could be heard clearly. Pals came a little closer to the shore and stopped.

"Wow, what an impressive landscape!... Bendy exclaimed." As you can see, the island has a lot of miracles... "

" Marvelous place..." Lara said. "I can't wait to explore everything..."

"Then we shouldn't waste our time..." Alice smiled.

"Firstly, we need to unpack our stuff..." Boris notices. "Where is our house?..."

"A little further away, let's walk straight and find..." Bendy replied.

Friends soon saw the house. It was made of light fine wood. Going inside, the friends thought the house seemed smaller from the outside. Bendy and Lara entered their room and began unpacking things from their rucksack. Meanwhile, Boris and Alice went to their room and did the same. When pals finished, they had for lunch.

"Now we can go explore the island..." Bendy said. "I think we'll see many splendid sceneries here..."

"No doubt about it..." Boris replied. "This island is called magical for a reason..."

"Of course, most likely, remarkable things are hidden here, maybe even treasures..."

"I don't think so, but we'll definitely see something peculiar..."

Friends left the house and walked around the island for a while, admiring the landscape.

However, soon friends found wonders...

"What great stones, each of them has a special symbol!..." Bendy said with surprise. "Looks like runes..."

"But what do they mean?..." asked Lara.

"One moment... Here, on a large stone it's written: "Health", on a stone that's near - "Wealth", and on those four stones - "Love, friendship - the values of life"...

"Someone laid out the stones on purpose..." Boris answered. "Interesting..."

"And informative..." Alice added.

"Maybe runes are are drawn not only on the stones..." Lara smiled.

"Speaking of extraordinary things - look, the clock is hanging on the leaves of palm trees!..." Bendy exclaimed.

"Wow... Very strange..." Boris said. "Do their mechanisms need to be repaired?..."

"Most likely, these watches work steadily, they don't even have bolts which can be unscrewed in order to see the mechanism..." Bendy replied. "What an excellent place..."

"And so cozy..." Lara remarked. "I want to stay near the palm trees for a while..."

"We'll be here as long as you want, dear... The island is worth the a walk..."

"But then we will visit less places..." Boris retorted.

"We still have a lot of time to view other amazing sights..." Alice replied.

"You're right, tomorrow we'll see the rest..."

The magicians took a walk near the golden clock and after a while came out on a golden path dotted with flowers. The flowers grew quite large and bright, with interesting shades and shapes. Bendy gave Lara a bouquet of wonderful flowers, soon Boris also collected flowers for Alice.

Guys admired the landscape around and soon saw numreous miracles: some palm trees had a colored trunk, it seemed as if it was glowing; also on one tree hung a memo written in some ancient language. Bendy knew what language it was, translated everything that was written to his friends. The note described the meaning of love and friendship, their importance. There were other wonders on the island that friends managed to see. Soon darkness fell - the guys went back.

Friends entered the house, and after having dinner, returned to their rooms, doing their usual things.

It was late evening. The edge of the moon became visible from the window, and everyone went to bed... Each of the friends had fantastic, exciting dreams inspired by the impressions of the miraculous, incredible island...

The next morning Bendy woke up quite early, smiling, watching Lara sleep. Soon she woke up, and he said, "Good morning, Lora!... Did you have a nice rest, my dream girl?..."

"Sure... And you?..."

"Same... Now I'll cook us breakfast..."

The devils enjoyed their meals and left the house.

"Strawberry, which way are we going today?... We can explore the opposite shore of the island..."

"I just wanted to see the other side..."

"We'll certainly find even more miracles..."

Bendy and Lara went on and later saw a path lined with colorful cobblestones. Nearby there were stones covered with moss, shimmering in the rays of the sun. Bright red flowers and emerald palms grew all around.

"Wow, how spectacular it is here!..." Bendy exclaimed. "A truly magical landscape..."

"And very interesting ..." said Lara. - I'd like to know what awaits us at the end of the path..."

"We'll find out, sweetheart... Can you see the end of the path?...

"Yes, I can..."

"We are almost there..."

The devils saw a golden chest covered with gems. The magicians looked at the chest with admiration, and Bendy opened it. The chest contained gold jewelry, sapphires, diamonds, emeralds, gold figurines.

"So there are treasures on the island..." said Bendy. "And, most interestingly, there's no lock on the chest - so no one needed to hide its contents..."

"Really unusual..." Lara thought. "Treasures are just lying here, apparently untouched..."

"We need to show the chest to our friends!... I think they'll also be impressed..."

The imps came back and entered the house. They noticed Boris and Alice approaching the kitchen, talking. The friends met, and Bendy told them about what he and Lara had found, much to the surprise of fellows.

Soon after meal time, guys were walking along the path and saw the chest.

"Wow, brilliant..." said Boris and opened it. "So many jewels inside... How did you find the key?..."

"We weren't," Bendy replied and smiled. "The chest wasn't locked..."

"Hmm, strange..."

"And wonderful at the same time..." Alice added. "I have never seen so many precious stones..."

"Neither have I..." Lara smiled.

"There are sapphires, rubies, emeralds, and diamonds..." Bendy listed. "Also amethysts, topazes, chrysolites..."

"And also many wonderful figures made of gold..." Boris remarked. "So, what are we going to do with these treasures?..."

"We'll leave them here..." Bendy replied. "I think they belong on the island... After all, the most valuable treasure is love and friendship!..."

"And the most necessary... " Lara said.

"It's prabably better if we don't take the gems," Alice looked at the jewels.

"You're right," Boris said. "Well, it was very interesting to look at the chest with real treasures... Where do we go next?..."

"Let's go right behind the path," Bendy replied.

Friends discovered large gray stones on which there were figures of frogs, near there were plants resembling clover. The guys looked at the place with interest, soon they noticed a small mine with a large waterfall. Exotic flowers grew on the stones near. The wizards saw other wonders: beautiful birds with an unusual bright color; butterflies whose wings struck with their size and color; leaves in the form of keys on some bushes; palm trees with foliage of dark blue and purple flowers.

Evening came, and friends came back. They decided to have dinner near the peaceful seashore, and Bendy prepared the meals, put the dishes on a small beach table. Everyone sat down, sharing their impressions after such adventure.

"This island holds countless amazing surprises and marvelous wonders..." Bendy said dreamily. "Wonder if we see the rest of the island..."

"Perhaps we should have a rest?..." Boris asked. "I'm rather tired from walking..."

"Well, we can take a break tomorrow," Bendy repled. "We still have a lot of time to explore the place..."

"Tomorrow we'll be relaxing on the beach..." Lara said. "Although, this trip didn't seem tedious to me at all, on the contrary, it's delightful..."

"A little rest won't hurt..." Alice noticed.

"Can't wait to draw here... Or solve sudoku..." Lara said.

"We can also read interesting travel stories or look through magazines about delightful plants..." Bendy added.

"See you tomorrow..." Boris smiled.

"Good night..."

Friends returned to their rooms and prepared for bed. The bright yellow moon came out from behind the clouds, coolness enveloped the island.

[dausy]

So I plan on finishing an illustration today and hopefully get it uploaded. I have a tentative first day at a new job tomorrow and now I'm stressing over that.

but also I spent the entire day out of town yesterday. We took our first ever outdoor rock climbing trip yesterday and I think all of us are feeling it today.

I felt kind of bad because I didn't have a chance before January to talk about some stuff I accomplished last year of all my hobbies and what I wanted to accomplish this year. So I figured I'd do a looksy backsy and ramble for a bit. Hopefully with cute divider icons if tumblr formats correctly.

so anyway, art related stuff. This time last year I was really wanting to try and build my own stationery set to sell at a local craft fair. Have to admit moving makes this seem too far out of reach. I do kinda feel like abandoning tiktok for youtube. Even though tiktok has the majority of my everything right now. Im at the moment enjoying the bloggy style rambling of youtube. I already have quite a few projects that I want to do but I feel like its been so long since I've uploaded an illustration that I need to do that first. I also have quite a few art supplies that I want to buy..maybe with like my first paycheck.

Games, last year I somehow managed to utilize my switch a lot. That thing went up on a shelf for a long time after animal crossing a few years ago and this past year I pulled it out quite a bit. I really need a goodreads but for video games so I can track what I've played because my memory is getting so bad. I played quite a few cozy games like ooblets and disney dreamlike valley but I also did some jrpgs like Atelier Sophie and Xenoblade Chronicles. I did just download harvestella as a break from xenoblade but I did enjoy the style of that game and would kind of like to play its sequels. I also at some point had meant to play Octopath traveller because I'd never played it and the sequel is out/coming out soon and the sequel looks better than the original imo.

The bulk of my playing though was Horizon Zero Dawn and its sequel. I played Assassins Creed Valhalla before that too so that was A LOT of open world explorey explorey, one right after another. I played HZD and immediately started Forbidden West immediately. I was really brain dead at the end. I get into insane map clearing mode and I cannot do anything until the map is clear. I really liked the idea of the story and I liked the open world nature. I originally wasn't interested in the game because of the machinery involved. Im more of a mystical dragons and castles person but I actually did really like the idea. I had some issues with the execution of the story. It taking itself so seriously yet being so cartoony at the same time. Ill play the triquel but I wasn't thrilled with HFW really.

Books. Previous year I did a personal challenge of trying to read 100 books and I think I got to 98. So I was a bit burnt out this past year. I did read more than I thought. Think I thought I read maybe 15 but I counted and read about 33 not including the Harry Potter Philosophers stone reread that I read in spanish. I do plan hopefully to read book 2 in spanish this year. I'm studying spanish and HP is such a familiar story I think it makes the language less daunting.

My favorite books were definitely Legends and Lattes and Home Before Dark by Riley Sager.

This year I have no real plans to read any sort of amount and I dont want to feel pressured to do so. I'm finishing some books that I didn't complete before 2022 ended. I finished 5 Days at Memorial right before the clock hit midnight practically on 2023 and it made me so angry at the medical field. I added 2 more medical books to my tbr. Ill finish 2 more books that are halfway done probably in the near future and then I don't know what else to read.

Ill admit trying to film art for youtube really interupts ones audiobook experience. I may just ditch books for ambient music.

[mutatedangels-a]

And Kirk's rattled with a little bit of guilt as he awaits his answer, because it soon becomes clear that he's got her thinking about the things she never really got to do throughout her life. It feels surreal to ask someone to create a bucket list on the spot—not for shits and giggles but with every real intention to complete it. He comes to wonder how many times he has set out to do something in the past, only for something else—or, pure laziness—to get into the way.

The only things he knows of Noa are the things she shows him while at the café. They're all fragmented, but they're parts of her all the same. There's the part of her that gets a kick out of every time he makes latte art (how many times has he fucked up, called it a ghost, and she looked at it and was like, 'This is the coolest thing I've ever seen'?), the part of her that sort of just bursts through the doors like a sudden bout of sunshine on a rainy day—unannounced but welcome and warm, and...

Well, all the things one divulges to their local barista. He's sort of like a bartender in that way, the only difference is nobody's drunk, just caffeinated, and the things they say are colors different from what somebody would confess after more than a few beers. He'd like to think he knows Noa pretty well, though he's aware there's a whole other world, many different layers to her that he hasn't seen, outside of the four walls of this cozy, campus-side café.

He's excited. But in a very, very sad way.

Taking mental note of all of her ideas, even the small ones like going to the beach or jumping on a trampoline, he gives her a smile. "Yeah," he tells her, nodding. "I'd skip out on the lattes for both of us today, but maybe on another cold day we can close the café for a little bit, train you, and have you work for a whole day." He snickers, realizing he has just fully given her unpaid labor. There's a wink that follows.

Then, he takes a deep breath. "I'm okay with whatever it is you wanna do," he says emphatically. "And—and I mean it. I'm not just saying this, to, you know, say it. After this week the café's gonna be closed more than it is open, and we can get together and finish off as many, or as little, things as you want. Even go on a date together." His voice gets a bit mumbly as he goes through the following words: "I mean, I don't know if I'd be the best person to go on a date with. Maybe we can find you somebody more handsome or fun. But anyways..."

He reaches behind the bar to grab something he knows is on a shelf underneath it, pretty close to the surface. Gangly arms and long legs can do that sort of thing without leaving their spot. It's a pad of guest checks, meant for taking orders. He pulls a pen out of his hair and hands both things to her.

"I'm free all day tomorrow. Write down the first thing you wanna do, and we'll do it."

    God damn it. She’d been doing so well. Tears flood her eyes when he asks that question, because no one has asked her that. It feels like no one in her entire fucking life has asked what she wanted, just what she’d sign a form to consent to so everyone could keep her alive longer.

“I don’t know.” Her voice is soft and thick. God, she doesn’t know! She doesn’t know what her options are that are feasible. She wants to have gone to high school. She wants to have been in a play of Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat. Maybe she could have been a track star — she has long legs. Or swimmer, maybe? There were so many times in her life she couldn’t even take a shower, because there was shit strapped to her chest that couldn’t get wet.

“I want to go to the beach.“ Tears clearing up. But that was just one thing. What else? “I want to go on a trampoline.” Technically, they were both things she’d been able to do at one point or another but never gotten around to because planning around everything was too much. And she spent so much of her free time exhausted.

Deep breath, and it wasn’t even that shaky. She wants to -- god, she's never -- "I want to go on a date." She's kissed people, but she's never gone on a proper date. Or even really a not-proper one. And she's not sure how much the kisses she's had count as proper kisses, either. "Like, dinner and a movie, drop me off home at an appropriate, respectful time date." Which. He did say to promise they'd do everything she listed together, which does mean her mentioning that did just basically mean she'd asked him on a date.

And well. He is pretty cute, now that she's thinking about it. She tilts her head at him a little, like a confused puppy. "If you're okay with that? Or -- or maybe cotton candy while walking down a pier. Or an arcade!" Also very date-y things and places. "Or a picnic?" Maybe it's starting to be obvious she'd never really thought that much about romance. Hadn't even read or watched that many stories that focused on romance, actually. She furrows her brows in thought and takes a sip from her latte. "Or maybe you could teach me how to make a latte."

That feels nicer.

Maybe not classic or movie-y, but more interesting.

"I could learn how to make the little koala." Which is pretty much just an incomprehensible half-drank clump of foam, at this point, but hey! All the more reason to make another. Although two cups of coffee will probably mean she'll have stomach pains later. Isn't exactly the most resilient lass around. "Or a turtle!" Noa looks to Kirk with a grin. "You kind of remind me of turtles, actually. They're my favorite animal you know. And I think I'm quite koala-like, personally. So you make me, I'll make you."

[taechaos]

A Thriller Film

pairing: director!Jungkook x fem!Reader

genre: oneshot, yandere, smut

synopsis: Jungkook's life is his movies, but people don't know his movies are his life. As an anonymous director, no one can suspect him as the villain in a story, but he leaves a clue in his movie about you.

warnings: smoking, stalking, murder, solo masturbation, public fingering

word count: 5.4k

a/n: i don't know why i put so much effort into this but we love to see it flop 🥰

Smoking is bad, but there are worse things in life.

Jungkook noticed you for the first time when a cigarette was hanging off his lips, exhaling the stress from the process of organizing a new thriller film with a less than cooperative crew. Fresh out of high school, you were bright and skipping on the sidewalk in the early hours of the morning. What would such a young woman, applying for colleges left and right, be so happy about?

He didn't know you at the time, but looking at you was like a breath of fresh air. While he survived off of coffee and nicotine, you seemed to have a lot of happiness to share. Your smile was incompatible with his frown.

So he ignored you when you passed him with your earphones blasting a song so loud, he involuntarily caught the lyrics.

Fall... back... in... to... place.

The second time he saw you, he was smoking again and you were just as happy as the day before. How can someone be so in tune with themselves, with life? The same song played from your earphones, the one he listened to on repeat after searching up the lyrics: Space Song. An urge to approach you surged up in him, but he only watched you as you walked past him. A single glance from you was all it took to anticipate tomorrow.

Today, when he recognizes you from your clothing first; colorful, silky, gorgeous. So much personality in one outfit, a polar opposite to his casual black outfit in jeans and a plain shirt. Even your bag is eye-catching, and he flicked the ash off of his cigarette before nodding at you as you passed the bus stop, reaching the front of his studio.

Why did your eyes just widen? You acknowledge him with a friendly smile, and go on your merry way. That is until he lightly taps your shoulder, and you turn instantly.

"Hey," he greets before you can utter a word, "where are you always rushing off to?"

Your lips part in surprise; the man you secretly - guiltily - side-eyed for the past few days noticed you when you weren't looking? "I have an interview. Well, a few," you chuckle.

"For what?" he tilts his head curiously and takes another drag from his stick.

"Career counseling," you plainly reply, but it sounds enthused. "I'm a clueless graduate." Your hands clutch your tote bag before you discreetly check the time on your wrist. You're going to be running late soon.

"You interested in cinematography?" Smoke follows his words, but you aren't fazed.

"I'm interested in all forms of art, why?"

He notices you checking your watch again. "I'm a film director. This is my studio," he cranes his neck behind him. "You can apply for an internship here. Maybe for a stylist even," he points at your floral romper with his chin as his eyes trail.

You shift your weight on your left foot when his stare flusters you, and you consider his flattering suggestion for only a second before saying, "thank you for the offer, but I need to go now," you grimace sheepishly, "can I think about it?"

"Take your time," he reassures with a sly smile and inhales from his stick, filling his lungs with the sweet scent of your perfume alongside.

He doesn't look away when you walk off with a shy wave, entranced by your struts until he's called back in. It's with newfound inspiration that he's inside of his studio.

The storyboard of his upcoming project needs a few tweaks, and he doesn't fail in enhancing his crew with a different idea.

It’s been a week. Okay, it might’ve been shorter, but Jungkook is impatient. Besides, it didn’t help when he saw you holding hands with someone... so less than. It really baffled him to see you with a guy who wore such shabby clothes. He looks like the type that Jungkook would cast for a flop character.

The two of you are like a toy display across his studio in that cutesy, obnoxious café with a smoothie in the middle of your booth. He chuckles as he lights up another stick when he notices the two straws in the single cup. Cliché, cheesy, but cute in a childish sense. Your age shines through the amateur romance between you and that loser.

It especially shows when you look to the side with a laugh and lock eyes with him; so flustered that you gasp and focus back on your date. What makes you so shy about seeing him? You seemed so confident during your conversation two days ago.

He whistles when he notices a stray dog in an alleyway. You look at him as well but don't hear anything beyond the glass wall, but it catches his attention regardless. He whistles again before saying in a hushed voice, "come here girl." It's difficult to suppress a smile when you gaze at him questioningly, as if trying to decipher his words. "Naive little girl," he mouths as he smokes, "what are you doing with that boy?"

He almost chokes when you take out your wallet in front of a waiter; are you paying for him? That's why you ordered one drink - so you could share? Jungkook isn't cruel but, he finds it laughable that your boyfriend is so... unappealing. He can't help but wonder why you're with him; maybe his face? The boy is somewhat handsome, but he only has his facial features to go by. It's rather strange for Jungkook to think about this in the first place, so he gets back inside his workplace after harshly shooing the stray dog away with a stomp of his foot.

"I'd like to start my internship today."

Jungkook runs his eyes up and down your body while leaning against a brick wall. "Paid?"

"I-I'll do it for free. Besides, I don't know if I'll even work in this industry," you twiddle your fingers while smiling up at him. He intimidates you, but this morning you decided you did enough thinking and here you are, an aspiring stylist all of a sudden.

"Get inside," he nods at the door before stubbing his cigarette and following you to his studio. "You know what you're going to do?"

"I'm going to decide the outfits, right?" The place looks cozy to you, with its minimalistic interior design and blunt switch between the stories. The first floor is strictly for business, with lined up cameras, lights and a microphone. There is even a green screen! And the second floor seems to be more of a resting area with its couches and open laptops, but you can't make out much from the entrance. Jungkook starts walking ahead of you, making a beeline for the black stairs. You tail behind him and smile at anyone who notices you, which isn't a lot of people. It's not crowded.

"Right. We're still working on a storyline, haven't finished it yet so it's possible this project might not be published. You with me so far?" he glances at you, and at your firm nod, continues, "when we finish planning, scripting and shit, you come to play."

"So what do I do now?" you innocently inquire and watch him plop down on the red velvet couch. He clicks on the space of his keyboard to light up his screen.

"I have an idea for a character, and I want to know how you would design her," he vaguely explains as he scrolls through his document.

"You want me to sketch it or explain?"

"Let's hear you out first. Irene," he suddenly calls out loudly.

"Yes?" a female responds from downstairs. You see a woman with a grey cap look up at him, her attire nothing short of casual.

"Come here."

She skips a few steps while climbing up the stairs at his command. You're not awkward when you greet her, and she offers a coy smile.

"This girl - what did you say your name was?" he asks you. You tell him and he continues, "she's going to be our intern. I want you to critique her with me."

"What's she in for?" Irene asks before sitting across from him.

"Wardrobe stylist."

Her eyes widen as she takes a second look at you. Your style is definitely unique, but... immature. She has half the mind to not question Jungkook about his choice.

"Okay..." she trails. "I'm Irene, by the way. I'm going to be an executive producer for the upcoming film."

"Nice to meet you," you brightly chirp. "Sir?"

Jungkook smirks at your addressing of him. "Yes?"

"What is your name, if I may ask?"

"I'm Jeon Jungkook, but you may know me for my pen name Shin Dong-hyuk."

Your mouth falls open when you instantly recognize the name. "Wait, what? You directed My Time?" you incredulously wonder aloud.

My Time is a movie that took the world by a storm; it brought recognition to the whole country for its popularity and clever writing. You never knew the name was a pseudonym, however. It's a suspense genre, about the life of a crazed fanboy who is obsessed with a foreign celebrity. He stalks her on the internet, has a fanpage of her and pays a hefty amount of money to strangers to update him on her whereabouts. He's portrayed as a young college student in the story, and inevitably runs out of cash from reckless spending. When she gets into a dating scandal, he goes on a theft spree and flies out to meet and confront her. It ends with her murder when he finds her with another man in a hotel room, and he stabs himself in the heart afterwards. There are a bunch of clues that foreshadow his ending, from his family life to his friendships. It's an amazing thriller, and you researched his name in the credits to find more of his works after seeing the movie but to no avail; there is only one listed.

"That's me," he nonchalantly reveals as if he didn't just give you the shock of your life. "Don't tell anyone though, will you?"

You whimsically put on an imagery zipper over your mouth while trying to recover from your racing heart.

"I don't have a clear outline, but the female lead is going to be naive but charming. She has to stand out, alright? Happy, extraordinary, special."

"We didn't decide on that," Irene butts in with a displeased expression.

"I forgot to tell you, I deleted our previous plan."

"You did wh-"

"What do you think?" he turns to you as he ignores Irene's shrieks. "What color are you imagining?"

You feel nervous when he puts you on the spotlight after revealing his identity. You close your eyes with a deep inhale before answering, "I'm thinking red and green, like Christmas. There should be a hint of white as well."

Jungkook drinks in your outfit before grinning mischievously. "Perfect." All of your colors.

Stalking is bad, but there are worse things in life.

Is it such a bad idea to follow you home when it's dark out? He kept you for a long time in the studio, allowing you to dress up a mannequin with all sorts of costumes you had in mind in the backroom. He's certain you had fun with him when you left with a permanent grin on your face.

You live with your parents, and he knows for sure he's at least 5 years older than you. You look about 19, so he's assuming he's only 8 years older.

A small villa with windows all around, he observes, before glancing back at your bedroom. The lights are on and you're swinging your legs with excitement on your bed after you face planted on the mattress. He didn't see you greet your parents before running off to your room, and he can't help the smile growing on his face at your hyperactivity. It was like an instinct to walk you home in secret and he isn't sure why he is still watching you. He should look away when you get off of your bed and heave your shirt over your chest, but instead he steps away from the lamp post to hide from the light.

You're changing, and he can't take his eyes off of you. As if that wasn't enough, you unclasp your bra without even pulling the curtains. Do you know he's there? The thought excites him, and his pants begin to tighten around his crotch. He lowly whistles at you, but you don't hear him again. You do look outside for a few seconds while stretching your arms, however, and he's certain you have a connection to him.

He leaves when you put on your pajamas with the image of your bare tits imprinted on his mind. He doesn't head home first, as the studio is only a few minutes away from your home and he wants to leave you a gift.

When the familiar building enters his vision, he doesn't waste time in unlocking the door and switching on a single dim light. He rushes to the backroom after locking the entrance for a second time and unzips his jeans as he goes. You were here not too long ago, and he can pinpoint exactly where you stood while striding to each corner with purpose. Bending, crouching, leaning, doing just about anything to tease him.

Now that he can imagine your perky nipples realistically, he immediately takes out his length from his restraints and picks up a random handkerchief to pump himself with. He doesn't stop to think over his actions; he's acting on urges, on impulse. Never has he ever done something like this.

He's rather relaxed as he sits down on an idle stool to close his eyes and run his hand up and down his shaft. What he would do to press your tits against his cock while he slides it up and down, smearing his cum all over your lips while you sleep. You would swallow it without a second thought once he finishes in your gaping mouth, and wonder why there's a dull ache in your breasts the next morning.

His breaths grow shallow the faster he strokes himself, the more he thinks about using every part of you for his pleasure while you're knocked out cold. He involuntarily thrusts into the air while quiet moans slip out of his open mouth. Something about how taboo it would be to fuck you while you're unconscious turns him on so much. Would that be something you're into?

The handkerchief is so soft, so silky against his length, he can almost imagine it to be your hand. He starts twisting his hand around his cock, from the base to the tip as his other hand palms his balls before he begins to reach climax. Strings of cusses fall out of his mouth when he quickens his pace, the fabric against his skin resounding in his ears before he finally spurts out his cum into the cloth.

"Fuck," he exhales as he coats his makeshift glove with his release. White on white doesn't make much of a difference, and he's panting as he folds the handkerchief to rub it evenly so it sinks in completely.

He leaves it on the stool after zipping his pants, and his eyes twinkle under the moonlight on his journey home.

You aren't alone when you walk to work. Jungkook is taking his usual smoke break while watching you swing your interlocked hands back and forth with the guy next to you. Your smiles exude the same aura, and Jungkook sarcastically notes how compatible the two of you are. The boxy grin shines with the sun, but it doesn't hide the boy's worn out clothes.

"Good morning, Jungkook," you greet before introducing your boyfriend. "This is Taehyung, Taehyung meet Jungkook. I'm going to be under his wing until I decide my major."

"Hello, Taehyung," Jungkook coldly says before blowing smoke in his face.

Taehyung scrunches his nose before chirping, "hi!" He then turns to you and whispers, "I thought you wanted to study medicine."

You shake your head dismissively with a light laugh before responding, "it's just an internship." You let go of his hand and bid farewell with a peck on his cheek before going inside the studio.

"Well, have a good day," Taehyung smiles as he's about to leave before Jungkook holds out his hand to block the way.

"Taehyung, who is your girlfriend?"

"Um," he furrows his brows before saying your name.

"And who are you?"

At Jungkook's blunt question, Taehyung pauses and takes a step back. "What do you mean? Like my full name?"

"No, who the fuck are you? What is your contribution to society? What do you do for a living? What are you wearing?"

"Sir, I-" Taehyung's stammering is cut short when Jungkook asks, "how much money for you to stop leeching off of her?"

He scoffs, "excuse me? I'm not leeching off of anyone, and I'm sure as hell not breaking up with her for your money." Taehyung's face heats up from the shameless confrontation, and he starts walking in the opposite direction.

"So you're not going to leave her?"

Taehyung doesn't turn to look at him as he emphasizes, "no."

"Good."

He abruptly stops in his tracks. "What?"

"Your dedication is admirable," Jungkook comments with a shrug. "I'm satisfied with your answer."

"Were you testing me?"

"Bingo."

He starts chuckling before shaking his head. "I always knew directors were crazy; you scared me for a second."

"Where you headed now?" Jungkook smoothly switches the subject, but notes the fact that you've spoken about him to your boyfriend.

"I have a farm two blocks away." When Jungkook raises a brow, he explains, "I stayed the night with her, so I decided to drop her off before leaving."

"Want me to drop you off?"

It's a kind offer, really, but Taehyung is still put off by the insults thrown his way just a minute ago. Doesn't he have work to do anyway? "That's alright, thank you, but I'll just take the bus. Have a good one, Jungkook."

Jungkook doesn't stop him as they both wave goodbye. He doesn't bother putting out his cigarette before going inside.

Where would be a farm only two blocks away from the city center? It has to be a lie.

You're wandering around the place as to not awkwardly wait for Jungkook who sharply inhales at the sight. He calls your name.

"Yes?"

"What do you want to become?"

"I," you look at him funny with a laugh, "I still don't know."

"Then take a gap year."

Your brows shoot up to your hairline. "Why?"

"I want you to be invested in this project completely. Once the planning is finished, I'll give you a salary. What do you think?"

He's asking you to work full-time for him. Not as an intern, but an employee and you are beyond willing after only being here for two days. He's a famous director; how can one pass up this opportunity?

"I'd love that."

You noticed that Jungkook has a very unique way of working. You've heard that he's been keeping his crew until late at night, already having an outline for his plot and he's moved onto screenwriting. He apparently disappears randomly throughout the evening after you leave, and you've had some different experiences with him of your own.

He asked you to steal from the wardrobe of his backroom. "Take everything that you'd wear," he said before stepping out of the room.

When you confusedly compiled all of the clothes that caught your eye under your arm, he took them from you and brought them upstairs with a huge grin. "Keep that one," he pointed at the handkerchief you thought about lacing your neck with.

Taehyung's quiet with you. He doesn't respond to your texts, doesn't call you, doesn't come over. You're too busy spending time with Jungkook to check up on him, and it serves as a well distraction when you keep glancing at your notifications. It hurts, especially when your wallpaper is a picture of you and him. It hurts because he isn't with you in your proudest moments when you were with him even at his parents' funeral.

The only thing keeping you happy is casting. Jungkook asked you to make a list of all the actors that would suit his characters after giving you a vague description of their traits. The budget isn't an issue, and you're having so much fun. He makes you forget your worries without even trying.

Jungkook intimidates you, but he's so lovely.

A mere "aspiring" stylist is casting actors for a movie. How many people can brag about that? You almost stumble on the stairs as you quickly climb up with Jungkook's laptop in your hands. He gave it to you for research purposes as he drew a rough storyboard with Irene.

"I made a list," you exclaim brightly. Heads shoot in your direction and you sheepishly grin at your volume. Jungkook's eyes linger on your covered neck; it's almost like a collar.

He whistles and beckons you to sit next to him. You obey and anxiously present your list to the professionals; you have no idea how to go on about this task, and no one guided you. You're certain you look utterly amateur in front of them.

Irene is inspecting your list without hinting her thoughts as Jungkook asks, "who are your favorites?"

"Well, I think Kim Namjoon is um, suitable for the male lead's role and Joy-"

"It's decided then," he claps his hands twice without hearing out Irene who scowls at him.

"You're not cooperating with us," she voices in a complaint, "why are you always calling the shots on your own? These are major decisions-"

"Ms. Bae, don't take any offence now. I'm taking your opinions into accounts when I make these decisions. Unless you have an issue with something, let's not dwell on this, hm?"

She sighs as you stand there awkwardly. She's upset, but stays silent.

"The two leads are Kim Namjoon and Park Soo-young. The team will decide the rest of the cast, thank you," he informs you with a ghost of a smile.

"Of course," you breathe.

You don't know how long it is supposed to take to shoot a film, but surely it's not this fast paced. Jungkook is relentless with his production; there are hardly any breaks in between takes. There are bags under his eyes from pulling all nighters to work on his scripts.

He is a perfectionist and a hard worker, as you've come to find out. You feel bad for the amount of times the actors recited their lines when they didn't capture a scene right in Jungkook's eyes. It was an honor for you to meet these famous people beyond a screen, and you were strictly ordered to do Joy's makeup only. You are her stylist, but the professional one does help you after she's finished with Namjoon's.

"Cut," Jungkook says into the speaker. You're located in a rented mansion outside of the city, but you can't enjoy it when everyone is so stressed. "Start over from line "he's leeching off of you"."

Even actors can't hide their annoyance from having to do a 25th take of one scene. Jungkook pays them enough to go on with this torture however, so they have no room to complain.

They start over and you force yourself to watch them again and again.

"Oh my god, cut!" You can hardly resist groaning yourself. Everyone on set is overworked, and you know the director has it the worst, but it's overwhelming you too at this point. You flinch when your name is called. "Act Joy's lines, will you?"

"Me?" you point at yourself in surprise.

"Go ahead," he urges with a nod.

You have no idea how to act, and it's nervewracking having to do it in front of A-listers. You pick up the script handed to you from another woman and start reading:

"He's not leeching off of me," you pause to inhale shakily; your hands tremble from the heavy stares on you.

"I'm his family, the only one he has left. No one would know if he was gone, and he trusts me to look after him without having to dangle a dollar bill over his head."

This goes on until the final scene, and the retakes cut down to half.

A few months pass, and it is time for the premiere. The movie, simply titled Pretty Girl, easily got a green light for display in theatres, and it's been heavily promoted on YouTube and TV. You are excited to your core, and watching the celebrities walk the red carpet was a first for you. Jungkook easily blends in with the crowd as he once again didn't reveal his real name in the credits, but his pen name is gaining more and more recognition. You have never seen the movie throughout the editing procedure, but you can't wait to see everyone's efforts show on the big screen.

You're dressed fancily because Jungkook asked you to go with him, and the two of you are sitting in the crowded theatre with not a single empty seat to be seen. Even the entrance is decorated in retro style to fit in with the movie's theme! The jazz music playing in the halls reaches your ears, and your knees are bouncing in anticipation of the movie. Jungkook is smiling as he listens to you ramble.

"I can't believe I played a part in this whole project!" you gush with shaking fists. "I met the best director I know, and I worked for him! This all feels like a dream... No one even likes my style, and yet I became a stylist!"

"I love your style," he denies, "even now you have all the attention in the room."

"Pfft," you roll your eyes playfully, "they all think I must look weird. I tried to wear something classy so I don't stand out, but it hasn't been working out."

"Keep it that way, you're beautiful like this."

Heat creeps up to your cheeks at his compliment and you squeak, "thank you."

He doesn't get to relish your flustered state as everyone goes quiet once the movie starts.

The time period is unclear, as the language is modern but the filter is black and white. The first scene is in a bar, a man in a suit eyeing a woman with a date who is an outcast with his clothes. They're washed out and ugly, but he looks handsome with his dazzling smile at the woman.

An involuntary grin spreads across your face when you hear their dialogue.

"I want to touch someone's shoulder to see how they react. Did you see how they looked at me when I walked in here? I think they think I'm your sugar baby or something," Jimin's character jokes with a laugh.

"I know! They're all so boujee, but I'm willing to be your mommy without sugar," Joy winks. They have fun until Jimin leaves to the bathroom and Namjoon's character approaches her, who has been staring at her ever since they walked in. Joy is offered a modeling career, and she accepts after she's told that her fashion only works with her because of how beautiful she is. She's bashful when Namjoon gives her a business card.

Jungkook's film is only over an hour long, but everything is timed so perfectly. His directory is straightforward, and you admire his work until a song comes on.

"That's my favorite song!" you whisper into his ear. It's Space Song by Beach House.

"Mine too," he whispers back.

There are montages of photo shoots, Joy's rise to fame in the modeling industry, but the trouble is Jimin, her boyfriend. Namjoon confronts him one day when Jimin drops her off to her new workplace.

"How can someone so poor be able to court a woman like her?" he asks rhetorically.

"Excuse me, Sir?" Jimin is offended until Namjoon laughs it off and reveals it was a joke. The audience sighs in relief, and all is fun and games until Jimin is brutally murdered next to a dumpster. You gasp at the gore scene and glance at Jungkook, until something dawns on you.

The story is starting to sound familiar. Was this movie inspired by your encounters? Your eyes light up as you give your utmost attention to the movie. The line between reality and fiction is beginning to blur.

Joy goes to Namjoon's house, where the dialogue you first reenacted comes to play. The shots are gorgeous, the script filled with metaphors on poverty and currency, and the romance is sickly sweet. There is a sex scene not long after... Joy forgets all about her boyfriend in the snap of Namjoon's fingers.

You tilt your head when you remember Taehyung. Where is he? How come your boyfriend didn't even show up to this life-changing experience?

Jungkook's hand slides over your thigh out of nowhere, as he murmurs, "do you mind?"

You stammer when his fingers reach under your dress to poke at your panties. "S-Sorry?"

"I said," he grazes your folds as you tense at the feather light touch, "do you mind if I touch you, pretty girl?"

Your chest heaves as your lashes flutter in a daze, but you nod nonetheless. His low raspy voice already has you clenching your thighs, unintentionally trapping his hand against your pussy. He's gentle, almost curious with the way he runs his fingers over your silky underwear before he moves it to the side. You're shivering with delight and thrill, and you don't take your eyes off of each other as he begins to flick your clit carelessly.

"Looks so pretty on you," he compliments the makeshift choker on your neck. It's his handkerchief you wore for the occasion, unaware that it's dried with cum. He pulls on the knot like it's a collar, and you're entranced. Your pants fan his lips at the close proximity, and he doesn't shy away from slotting his mouth against yours. You quietly moan into the kiss when his thumb starts to rub your clit, and his long finger pokes at your entrance.

"You mind?" he murmurs against your lips, his words slightly slurred as he doesn't stop kissing you. The wet noises are drowned out by the loud volume of the movie, but you can't focus on what's going on.

"I don't," you breathe before he slips in two fingers, exploring your walls with precision. He's multitasking as he circles your sensitive clit, and you're not very experienced in regards to sexual encounters but your hand lands on his hard-on anyway.

"Don't be shy," he chuckles into your neck, "touch it."

You don't know what you're doing when you slip your hand under his pants and palm him over his briefs, but his sigh is encouraging you. You're touching each other in a room of 100 people.

It's embarrassing when his free hand joins yours to help you touch him while simultaneously fingering you. He must have sensed your lack of confidence, because he starts to stroke his erection over your hand. You start to imagine his fingers as the real thing, and with your particularly low stamina, have a hard time suppressing your whines.

"Kiss my neck," he suggests as a solution to your nibbling. You didn't even realize your nether lip is bleeding from how hard you were biting on it. You bury your head in his shoulder and start pecking his neck. He holds back a laugh at how shy you're being, and he feels proud for predicting this moment perfectly in the movie. Joy is having the time of her life with Namjoon, unaware of Jimin decaying in the attic.

He quickens his pace in your cunt, and you bite him rather harshly at the sensation. He hisses with a chuckle; he likes it when you're impulsive. He can pick up the squelches from his thrusts because of how wet you are, and you climax all over his fingers in a matter of seconds with a whimper. You're twitching in your seat, and your hand strokes him faster but he stops you.

"In my studio," he says and you nod tiredly against his shoulder. The issue isn't that he doesn't want to cum in his pants, but the movie needs to become reality. He wants to fuck you on that one stool, with Taehyung's corpse decomposing in the backroom.

Jungkook always adds a pinch of fiction to his stories, but they're mostly based on true events. If you paid attention to the ending, maybe you would've realized that.

Lying is bad, but there are worse things in life.

[downwiththemutantnjnjaturtles]

Vulnerable [chapt. 1/2]

[2012 Leo x reader]

Based off of a request from an Anon: "A reader who is good at archery?" and the art is in fact mine, signature in the corner.

Leonardo grimaced as he walked. On his bad leg he still limped a bit, but he no longer was so dependent on his crutches. Every step was a twinge of pain in his knee, but he continued, bow in hand and looking for prey. The rest of the team was back at the farmhouse—he wanted to do this alone. He needed to do something. For himself and everyone else. 

He crept along the forest floor, senses hyper-aware of all of the things around him, as with his injured leg, he felt vulnerable. He jumped when a bird shot out of a tree nearby with another one hot on its tail feathers. When had he become so easy to start? Of course, as a ninja, he was trained to be skeptical. Aware. But he'd never felt so jumpy as he did after coming out of his coma, his throat wrecked and his knee in just as bad a condition. He took in a deep breath, then released it. Focus. 

He definitely felt like he was being watched. He was in a sea of trees and bush, wandering and out of his element, having come from the city. It was such a jarring change to have been struck down in a construction site on that frightening day, only to wake up three months later in a quaint farmhouse outside of New York City. His stomach churned slightly recalling what he could remember from his encounter with the Shredder and the wave after wave of Foot Bots. The cold rain, and their mortal enemy's imposing figure stood above him before going in for the kill. He shook himself of those thoughts—not now. Today was sunny. He had to look around him for a second as if to assure that there was light shrouding everything. That there were no shadows to hide in. Shifting his footing, his knee suddenly jerked forward and sent a shot up pain up his leg. He had to resist making noise, but in that moment, a shudder ran down his spine. The sheer pain, he remembered, of the Shredder's blades catching his neck. The trauma to his knee. He didn't know when he'd started breathing heavily, still and partially leaning on his bow. When would he ever be able to recall that day without it shaking him so deeply? Would the memories hit him during his next and inevitable meeting with Shredder? 

But he couldn't think about that now, not as he heard rustling in the brush ahead of him. He stilled. Crouching, he took to the large trunk of an oak and hid behind it, peering around the corner to catch a glimpse of what he was hearing. It sounded big; likely a deer. As long as he didn't engage with a buck and his fearsome rack of antlers, he would be okay. His knee ached as he kneeled there. No sudden movements, he reminded himself. 

He looked around the side of the tree and saw it. A tall, proud buck and his air of regality, eating from a plant and seemingly unaware of Leo's presence. This was his chance to make himself useful. To stick it to his cursed leg that he wouldn't let it stop him. 

Rising as slowly and quietly as he could, he lifted his bow and drew an arrow. He had to find the perfect moment. But he also couldn't wait too long, otherwise he would lose the animal. The buck paused his meal and looked up, smelling the air. He ducked back behind the tree when it actually turned its head toward him, almost as if in acknowledgement. But deer's eyes didn't face forwards—if it were looking for a threat, it would have turned its head. Ignoring that detail, Leo knew it would get his scent quickly, so there was not much time to waste as he aimed, shooting for something vital. The buck stiffened, readying to bound off. He was just about to let loose the arrow when he blinked, and suddenly, there was nothing. The buck was gone, the clearing was empty, and he was extremely confused. He stood up, letting down his bow as he stepped out from behind the tree and looked around him. It had been there one moment, gone the next. 

He jolted when a twig snapped behind him. He spun around, arrow ready to fire. Standing only but a few feet away was the large creature looking down at him, and in his surprise, Leo hesitated. He wasn't sure what to do beside lower his weapon, eyes fixated on the impressive antlers the buck donned. Those could deliver a fierce blow. 

He was backing away, opting to ditch the effort and try again another time, because the animal was certainly strong. And not with his bad leg could he defend himself as much as he would have liked—but unnaturally fast, the buck charged forward anyway. Heart pumping, Leo gasped and drew his arrow, trying to get a clear shot on the animal as it vanished around him, disappearing behind trees, reappearing elsewhere, running at him from every which way. He let out a loud grunt when he was struck in the abdomen by it, disoriented and trying to gain his footing. He tried to dodge the oncoming attack, but his knee buckled, and he fell to the ground against the mossy trunk of a massive tree. His bow was dropped elsewhere. In a last resort, he swiped his knife from his belt, eyes flitting about. He expected another blow from the strange animal, but nothing came. He was left in shock sitting there as he regained his composure, only noticing the buck out of the corner of his eye one last time. 

He watched it, brow ridge furrowed intensely as he got up and snatched his bow from the ground. The buck only stared back, his reaching presence making an imprint in Leo's mind. He knew then that there was something else to this. He had no idea, not even a clue, of where to start with it. But the creature sauntered further into the trees, disappearing into the thicket. 

"What was that?" he muttered to himself, unable to look away from where he'd last seen it. 

He returned to the farmhouse later that night, meeting you at the front porch when he dragged himself up there. His knee was irritated to all hell from the exertion, and you could tell, too; he favored his good leg when he stepped, wincing as he came over. It was then that you noticed he looked a little more rough than you'd originally thought. 

"Leo?" you said, meeting him at the stairs. He tried to give you a smile, but it was obvious he was absolutely beat, his leg was hurting, and overall, not in a good way. "Are you okay? What happened out there?" 

You helped him up the steps with an arm around him, supporting his heavy weight as he made his way into the house. He groaned, a little shameful, "I got attacked by a...deer."

He left his bow and quiver at the door. A deer? You gave him a questioning look, and he continued, "Yeah, a deer. Like with the antlers. It came at me when it realized I was there. I've never seen something move so fast." 

You were going to help him to the couch, but he shrugged your arm off with a sheepish smile, getting there himself. You sat down next to him. "So, an angry buck?" you asked. He nodded. "Weird...it's not mating season. Usually, they aren't so aggressive." 

"Well, this one was," he said, "and I know this is going to sound weird, but…" 

He knew it would be hard to explain why he suspected this was something otherworldly, due to the teleporting. He'd seen it clearly with his own two eyes. Still, it was just as confusing to him to think about as it would have been for you to hear.

"Wait, how do you know that?" he inquired. He looked over at you, blue eyes falling on yours. 

You chuckled, "My dad was into hunting, so I picked up some stuff as a kid. You learn that pretty early on; the antlers on those things can really tear you up. Though...you're lucky for having natural armor." Gesturing toward his bow and arrow, you bumped his shoulder with your own. "I'd say I'm good with one of those." 

Leo quirked his brow, curious for you to go on. He didn't doubt your statement one bit; he'd seen how you watched him practice, how sometimes, he'd catch you idly running your hand along the curves of the bow. "How good would you say you are?" 

Grinning, you padded across the room and got his bow, drawing back the string experimentally. It had been a while. You threw a glance back at him over your shoulder. "Fairly," you replied, setting it down. "I think my parents started me out when I was twelve or so. With one of those kiddie bows, the ones that are easy to pull back? I'm no master, but maybe...I could come out and help you next time? I don't think any of us should be going out alone, anyway, especially you with your…"

He noticed your eyes had fallen on his injured leg. 

"Uh, hold on. I'm not an invalid, [y/n]." 

He didn't want to be snappish, but the last part irked him a little. He could handle himself out there. How well he could was a different story, but nonetheless, he felt weirdly infantile hearing that. It should have been him telling you that and offering to help, not the other way around. 

Damn his leg. 

Still, he knew he had to swallow his pride, for now. He really was in no shape to be wandering the woods on his own. He also noticed that it was a great opportunity to bond with you more without everyone around to overanalyze it. 

"You know, I...I appreciate it. I know you're just trying to help." He tried to hide the disappointment he was feeling with himself, but it was easily replaced by more positive prospects. He hadn't ever spent that much time with you alone, as they were always going, going, going. The farmhouse and surrounding woods was a slow change of pace—a good change of pace. But even then, he still couldn't always get away from everyone else, especially Mikey and Casey. "What do you say we go out tomorrow?" 

You nodded, "I say it's a date!" 

"Y–yeah," He laughed, looking down at the floor. "It's a...yeah. I'm going to go to bed now. Goodnight, [y/n]." 

"Night," you said as he headed up the stairs. 

Mind on the kitchen for a drink before you went to bed yourself, you were slightly surprised to see April there, leaning against the counter with a curious smile on her face. "Oh, hey, April," you mumbled, reaching past her for a glass. 

"Hey," she cooed, "so, a date, huh?" A knowing grin crossed her face, along with that twinkle in her eye she got any time something like this came up. 

Face beginning to flush, you chuckled awkwardly as you filled up your glass from the tap. "Uh, it's more like a...it's not really a date. I just said that. For some reason. We're gonna go out into the woods and scope it out for a little bit." You glanced out of the corner of your eye and saw her sat at the kitchen table, patting the chair next to her. A date? Like that? No. In fact, he was likely offended to some degree that you even proposed helping him out. Not with how sensitive he was about his knee, lately, which was a hindrance to him. But you wanted to help, that's what friends were for. And maybe spending some time away from the antics of his brothers and Casey wasn't such a bad idea, either…

You were going to slip out of the kitchen, but April was set on getting the details. "Come on, girl talk!" she said, low enough so no one else would hear, but you could hear the excitement in her voice. "Did he get embarrassed? Oh, what about bringing lunch? Like a picnic, in the woods," she suggested, clasping her hands. "Quiet, away from you-know-who. It would be nice!" 

"Okay, okay, slow down there," you said. You took a seat next to her and looked behind you into the living room to make sure there wasn't anyone there, then added, "You see, I don't know for sure…" 

...if Leo felt the same way. There was a hunch, but that wouldn't do—you couldn't go off of a mere inkling, lest you ruin good friendship turning things weird. You liked him. How obvious it was, you didn't know, but you never tried to show it on purpose. 

April noticed the uncertainty of your expression and put her hand on yours in your lap. She could feel your hesitance over the subject. "You're worried that he doesn't feel the same way about you," she stated softly. "Is that it?" 

"In short," you answered with a small shrug as you kept your gaze on the edge of the table. 

She tilted her head in thought, humming to herself. "Well, I think you should go for it, if that's how you feel." 

Looking up at her, you inquired, "What if it makes things awkward between us?" That was the last thing you wanted. 

"I think Leo might have a crush on you," she said finally. "Of course, I can't tell you definitely, but...it's just the vibe he gives me."

Your heart fluttered. April's intuition had always seemed pretty on point; you trusted her judgement more often than not. The question was, did you have the guts to come out with it to him, or would it be another time gone past? Hung up on her words, you blinked. "Do you think so?" you asked honestly. 

She nodded and gave a reassuring smile. "I won't pressure you, but I still think you'll have a great time. I can put together a basket, if you want. We don't have much besides sandwiches, though." April was considerate. It was easy to feel comfortable around her; she was a gentle soul outside of combat, and supportive of yours and everyone else's pursuits (so long as they weren't harmful.) Especially pursuits of love, when they weren't directed at herself. 

You thanked her as you got up, to which she replied that it was no problem. Leo's door was cracked slightly open, you'd found out when you passed by, and inside he was fast asleep. he tended to leave it ajar out of habit; he felt that he needed to be able to hear what was going on in the rest of the house in case something happened, paranoid of ambushes. The only time he wasn't conscious of his bad leg was when he was unconscious, and even then, you had a suspicion that he dreamed about it sometimes. Maybe even had nightmares. You recalled seeing him toss and turn one night while muttering incoherent things after he'd fallen asleep on the couch in the lounge, almost rolling off the side before you decided to wake him. Both the mental and physical wound was fresh at that time, so he panicked himself awake feeling your hand lightly shake his shoulder. He apologized as you tried to help him, instead taking his crutches and left by himself. 

But Leo seemed to be having good dreams, tonight. You stopped just for a moment to watch him through the ajar door, seeing that his face was not tense, he wasn't moving around, and looked to be more at peace than he had in a while. That was all you needed to know.

"He looks pretty calm right now," a voice, Raph's, commented out from the blue next to you. He was leaned against the wall, arms crossed as he watched his sleeping brother. "Last few nights were rough. Wonder what has him all peaceful all of a sudden."

You couldn't mistake Raph's unusually soft disposition, even if he talked as gruffly as always. "Does he have bad dreams about it often?" you questioned him. Both of you knew what you were talking about, the event in New York City that landed them all at the farmhouse to begin with. 

Sighing, he answered with a light scoff, "More like nightmares." For a second, you thought he was annoyed by you asking, but he continued, shaking his head. "This just…I can't stand seein' him like this. Not like this, this, but on those nights he gets nightmares, and the hobbling around…"

"It really sucks."

"Big time." 

A silence fell between the two of you, but it wasn't uncomfortable. You both bonding over your mutual care for Leo and his well-being, brought together by circumstance. Raph went to bed. You did, too, thinking all the way that Leo deserved a good day. A normal-as-could-be day. 

You'd take April up on that picnic idea, you decided. 

——————————————————————

a/n: yeahh i find it difficult to believe Leo wouldn't have some kind of lowkey trauma aside physical after his last encounter with Oroku Saki before the Farmhouse

[topweeklyupdate]

TØP Weekly Update #142: A Formidable Album (5/21/21)

So... how 'bout that album release week?

There's so much to cover; the release of nine new songs, the hype that's building for the World's Best Band to return to the stage, and (if we're able to come up for air) the massive speculation of what the future brings for our band.

I'm gonna get right into it, laying out my thoughts regarding this bold new album and covering all the most notable news from the week. I'll be sharing my (mostly) positive opinions about Scaled and Icy under the Read More line; I hope they're the start of a fun conversation with all of y'all who have stuck around through this last year.

Scaled and Icy Review

First, my general thoughts on the album: It's good! Really good. Do I think it's a no-skip like Vessel or a cohesive piece of art like Trench? Absolutely not! But it's also not the potential misfire that I worried that we might be getting when I first heard "Saturday" (more on that later); I think all of the songs are at least good, and some of them are downright great tracks that hold up with anything else that our band has ever released. It is also indisputably very different, but I think that generally works pretty well. Many of the songs evoke '60s rock or Britpop sounds and structures that you can tell Tyler is still trying to navigate, but I think he does a very solid job at adapting them to suit his strengths- namely his lyricism and knack for melody- rather than change to suit them. Unfortunately, this does result in a bit of square-peg-in-round-hole syndrome at times; most of the rap verses on the album feel like they're here just to fulfill an obligation to fans who would be mad if they weren't here, and most of the songs that use them are the weakest ones in the project.

"Good Day" plays a major role in getting the rest of the album to work as well as it does. Its gradual ramp-up, introducing the sound that will be used throughout the rest of the album. Its playfulness belies its message about how one can project a somewhat false optimism for oneself in the midst of tragedy: the type of dark stuff in a bright package that Tyler is so so good at. It's perhaps not an instant classic, but I am excited to see how it comes across when it's eventually used as a show-opener. 9/10

I've of course already discussed "Shy Away"; an anthemic, inimitably catchy track that I just wish had a bit more going on under the hood. Still going to be so good to hear thousands of voices scream "An 'I LOVE YOU' that isn't words!" someday. 9.5/10

"Choker" definitely took a little bit to grow on me. I think part of that was a bit of disappointment from over-inflated expectations and the environment I was in when I first heard it. With further listens, I fall more and more in love with the melody of the song... well, most of it. Like the rest of this album, the biggest weakness in the song is when Tyler tries to tick the box of having a rap verse; it just feels really out of place, unfinished, and almost amateurish, and it doesn't end the song on the note that it really should. Without it, it'd be one of my favorites on the album; with it, "Choker" is a solid 8.5/10.

Speaking of unfinished-sounding songs really hurt by their rap verse: "The Outside". There's a definite something to the vibe of the song, but that seemingly nonsensical verse is one of the two weakest parts of the entire project for me. The way the song meanders only adds to the feeling that there wasn't as much energy and attention paid to it compared to other parts of the project. It's pretty easily my least favorite track on Scaled and Icy, and the only one I might regularly skip. I've also seen plenty of people saying it's the best song on the album, so please tell me why I'm wrong! 6.5/10

"Saturday", as mentioned above, had me really nervous about this album. Like "Choker", it's grown on me a bit since I first heard it, in part because it fits better with the context of the rest of the album. However, this one really does feel undercooked lyrically and overreliant on the novelty of using a disco-inspired sound that seems to chase trends more than almost any other TØP track. The inclusion of that very sweet audio clip from Jenna boosts the song in some ways, but also adds to the disappointment in others; there are many other songs on this project that would be more worth surrendering time watching Friends. Thankfully, those come next. 7/10

"Never Take It" is fascinating. I never thought I'd hear a Rolling Stones-style song from Tyler Joseph featuring a gd guitar solo of all things, and it actually sounds pretty great. However, I also predict that this song will see some of the greatest critical scrutiny out of all the songs on the album. The lyrics seem to be Tyler's criticism of the media for playing up division in our society, but he's extremely vague when discussing which entities are spreading said division and ultimately recommends that people "educate yourself, but never too much". I'll be honest: maybe it's the fact that it sounds like something my dad would listen to, but it feels like this would get tons of play on Fox News. Since it makes specific reference to the events of last summer, it's hard not to feel like song is at least partially inspired by Tyler's brush with cancellation last year. Maybe I'm reading too deeply into it, but those reservations come from the song's lack of specificity, which is an issue of songwriting more than politics. They hold me back from truly loving a song that still manages to be one of the most exciting the band has ever put out. 8.5/10

"Mulberry Street" seems like the perfect realization of the entire album's intended tone. It is so pleasant, so lush while also simply produced, full of great lyrics, metaphors, and imagery. It really brings the whole project together, even if it's missing That One Line to really move this up to the top tier of the canon. 9.5/10

"Formidable" is the best song on the album and one of two songs I would truly rank in the top tier of the band's canon. Extremely pleasant and brimming with well-crafted lines to make your heart swoon. Jenna (and Rosie) is (are) a lucky gal(s). Or is it about Josh? Who's to say? 10/10

"Bounce Man" is just plain wild. I think Tyler's smuggling someone to Mexico to escape the feds? The playfulness of it all really covers up any frustration I might have with the clarity; it makes it clear that there's not really stakes here, just vibes. 8.5/10

"No Chances" sees the album take a turn that I'm sure the Reddit Clique is going to have an absolute field day with; it and "Redecorate" both sound quite different from the rest of the album and evoke enough elements of Trench to make me think that's it's actually possible that all this 'SAI is Propaganda' stuff might actually have something to it... until I actually pick apart the lyrics, then I'm even more confused. The song has some of the best rapping on the album, though that's not saying much (the feng shui line is a groaner right out the gate) and the gentle pre-chorus is really pleasant. I still haven't made up my mind on whether the chorus is effective or just plain goofy. This one might get worse or better on repeat listens, impossible to say for now. 7.5/10

"Redecorate" rounds out the album by opening with a Clancy quote (Tyler, you bastard), firmly setting this as a coda to Trench more than the album we just listened to. The rest of the song is really storytelling, with Tyler describing a bunch of people who are struggling deeply. The idea of "redecorating" here stands for how they are faced with the option to clean and resort their own spaces and lives or leave that to their loved ones to do after they're gone. By the time it gets to the album's name drop, you begin to wonder how much of this is potential autobiographical of the last year. It's moving stuff, a callback to some of the great strengths of the band's discography. 10/10

If I average those scores all up, this project ranks below almost every album among the Pilots discography on my rating scale, very narrowly edging out Self-Titled. That's still a very solid 8.6. Scaled and Icy is a very good album on first listen. We'll see how I feel about it after having a little more time to sit with it, but I've rambled enough: let's move through the rest of the week's news.

Other News

Of course, there was a lot else going on this week! To accompany the release of "Saturday", Zane Lowe over at Apple Music dropped an interview with Tyler. As usual, Zane did a pretty solid job of getting to the heart of the craft and the creation process. However, Tyler also wound up skirting a lot of the questions to just talk more about how much he loves being a dad, which makes me happy; if the cost of getting a little less attention and mental energy devoted to the music is that little girl getting all of his attention, that's honestly preferable for me.

The album rollout is not even close to over. Later today, the concert will be streamed live. It's our first real performance that we've gotten from the band since 2019, but the previews that we've seen have completely exceeded any of my expectations, and really anything that we've seen from the band. It appears that they've transformed the entire arena (which I think is the ol' Schott at Ohio State) into a whole TØP world, with different sets laden with Easter eggs and a cast of backup dancers. If the website can hold up to the traffic (and I acknowledge that might be a big ask), this could really live up to Tyler's promise of this being the best livestreamed concert ever.

Oh, and this guy dyed his hair pink.

What a time to be a fan. Catch you all tomorrow.

Power to the local dreamer.

|-/

[bootyyy-shaker9000]

Give Me A Chance

D.Danny x G-N! Reader [Oneshot]

Relationship: Pining - Romantic

Warnings: Slight Cursing, A Suggestive Joke, Fluff.

"Here ya' go, Big Mama!" Heaving five large worn-sacks of what you expected to contain Yokai goods, the three partners-in-crime grinned triumphantly. "Managed to loot them flashy broads from a few blocks down, slipped in and out no problem."

Big Mama's features gleamed in awe as she watched the rugged men stroll through her lobby, nearing towards her with her prize. "Oh, splendid! Well, I'm sure you are well aware of sorting your share."

From your positioning nearby Big Mama's grand table, you inspected them as they lugged three of the five bags of plunder onto a convenient marble surface.

Mickey bobbed his head in affirmation. "Sixty per cent on your end, Boss. Just like we promised ya'!"

"Formidable work, boys. I once again thank you for your service." The woman's gaze wandered, examining the stash as she wavered her hand over it all. "Now, I'll just have my assistant here take care of this while you fellas make yourself acquainted."

The mention of your given role had peaked your attention, giving the Mud Dogs a once over before making your way to the table. Big Mama placed a delicate hand on your shoulder, her mouth nearing towards your ear whispering: "Keep a close eye on them for me. Don't want their grubby fingers finding themselves somewhere they shouldn't."

Your eyes trailed up to Loathsome stretching out on a nearby settee with Malicious gawking at the fine art that scattered across the lobby's walls. While Dastardly - the only Mud Dog that had "conversed" with you on multiple occasions - perched his elbows on the tabletop's edge with body facing towards you, awaiting your arrival.

Your over-watch would basically be unnecessary when you already have the rat's eyes watching your every move. Not that you minded his attention (to an extent), you just had no idea what enjoyment he was getting out of it.

"Will do, Chief."

With that, Big Mama made her way out of the area with a rhythmic sway of her hips. While in turn, you stalked over to the pile of moolah you were set to examine, having to position yourself beside the dapper rat; who seemed all too eager to stay close.

"So uh," Dastardly adjusted his footing, tilting his head to get a better look at you. "How's work been holding up for ya' recently?"

You halted your inspection to take a subtle glance around, Danny taking note of it on the spot. "The coast is clear, doll, don't worry 'bout it."

He nodded reassuringly with his brow quirked before you dragged out a long inflated sigh. You flipped your back to the table, the small of your back resting on the table's edge as you mirrored the rat's laid-back stance.

"It freaking blows. Literally the most boring job known to pretty much anyone." You combed your fingers through the roots of your hair, giving your scalp a small rub in the process. "It's shocking how exhausting it is to do absolutely nothing, seriously. I'd rather be on my feet actually doing something, you know, like you guys. Being an errand boy or whatever."

"Errand boys?" An offended scoff was sent to you in return, the sound already making the corners of your lips turn up. "I'll have you know it takes a lotta skill and precision ta' do what we do half the time."

"Yeah and the other half you just spend it aimlessly goofing around."

"Meh, whatcha gonna do?"

You chuckled before lazily hoisting yourself up onto the counter, careful not to get an ass full of coins by avoiding the bags of loot. "Hey, I wasn't exactly saying it was a bad thing. It's gotta be fun at least."

With your body slumped, you held your position with your palms pressed to the marble surface. Peeking out from your downcast gaze, you caught a glimpse of Dastardly inching himself closer to your side. The left side of his hip rested on the slab as he dug his hands deep into his pockets, eyeing your form intently.

"Y'know... We could have some fun, just you and me."

Your head struck up in an instant. "Woah there, Casanova. Try to keep it in your pants, you're supposed to be a professional."

"Whaddya m-" His brows drew together in confusing before his cheeks tinted as the realisation dawned on him. "Oh! Oh, shi- no! Jeez, toots, I just meant 'fun' as in taking you outta' dinner or catch a show or somethin'."

A brazen grin made its way to his lips, his nostrils slightly flaring. "Unless that other offer is on the table then-"

"-It isn't."

"Well," Faltering only for a moment, his thin lips stretched back into a small smile but it didn't quite reach his dark eyes, "how about that date then?"

You just... Didn't understand.

"What makes you so interested in going out with me?" Your brow raised in question, tapping your index finger anxiously on the cold marble. "We've barely even talked."

Bashful, Dastardly brought a clammy hand up to rub the back of his neck, giving his tendons a slight message. "Heh, that’s kinda the reason why, toots. I can't figure you out."

The man let out a sigh before slumping back onto the edge of the table, crossing one ankle over the other as he shifted his weight.

"Usually, I can look at someone and read em on the spot, but you don't put too much of yourself out there. Every time I'm here you give me feelings I ain't totally sure on how to handle, but I sorta like it. I always wanna hang out with you and do stupid shit without the boys taggin' along, it doesn't even matter what we do!"

You winced as he got excitable the more he went on. "Danny..."

"Just hear me out, please." He set his hands out in front of him to figuratively set you on pause. "I wanna get to know ya, and a part of me thinks you wanna get to know me too. So, if you're willin', lemme take you out so we can get to know each other. Outside of all this."

Of course you wanted to get to know him. He was this mysterious guy in a striped suit that would waltz in and out of your workplace every week and actually take the time to notice you around. You couldn't help the curiosity that welled deep in your belly every time you caught him eyeing you from across the room.

You just couldn't wrap your head around the fact that he actually wanted to know who you were. Not just one of Big Mama's collaborators. Not just the associate that idled around wherever your boss lurked. Just you. You couldn't help but be fond of the man for wanting to do so.

Though you were still cautious of his intentions...

Huffing lightly, you replied. "So there are these guys that have been pestering Big Mama, right? They've been digging at her to pay up whatever expenditure she owed them, and obviously, she did. Holding up her end of the bargain as always."

"And this has somethin' to do with the date thing because...?"

"Lemme finish. But as you also know, that woman isn't one for letting someone give her such a hard time without 'semi-retaliating'..."

"I'm reckoning that's where the boys and I come in." The rat roughly adjusted the collar of his shirt, loosening the top button. "So doing this job is the only way I'm going to have a chance with you, huh?"

You couldn't help the nip of guilt that caught you. "See it as more of a test, Romeo."

Hopping off of the counter with ease, you manoeuvred yourself in front of the man, setting your hands on his lapels. You fixed his blazer with a slight pull while straightening it out in the process.

"Do this particularly important job, then I'll consider..." Your eyes reached up to meet Danny's, observing his pink-tinted features for a brief moment. "The date thing. Deal?"

Despite feeling grateful for the offer, he sounded slightly defeated. "Consider?"

Tugging gently on his lapels, you brought your mouth up to his ear, keeping your voice hushed. "It's a definite yes if you get your ass back here quick enough."

His ear flicked back as his dumbstruck eyes stared at you in what seemed to be a mixture of disbelief and excitement. Coughing out to compose himself, he turned away from your form to face the two Yokai that loitered across the room.

"Aye, boys! D'ya hear that? We got a job to do, move yer hides!" Danny ushered them to the exit with a vigorous waft of his arms, ignoring any annoyed protests.

Before leaving the building himself, the suited man pivoted on one heel to bid you a due, with a smug tip of his hat. "See you soon, sunshine."

In return, you gave a simple short wave of your hand goodbye. Though you couldn't help but reflect the flashy grin that he held onto your own features.

The realisation only just settling in, you sprung up to halt him from leaving the lobby. "Wait, Danny! I haven't even told you the job yet!"

Almost cartoonish, the Yokai poked his head back through the door way. "But I just- i just made a big deal with the leaving thing! And no- oh y'know what, I'll be back tomorrow!"

"Okay!" A hearty laugh escaped your lips as you watched him leave for the second time, leaving you desolate.

Maybe he's worth that chance.

[lizzybeth1986]

Quick Thoughts on DD Book 1 Chapter 5

• Content Warning: There are references to slut shaming while speaking about opera singers, and I speak about executions in the Hamid scene (I've not added grisly details or anything, but to me what I have included does sound a little macabre). I don't know if those warrant a warning, but I'd like to err on the side of caution and ensure that anyone comfortable with that knows this before they make the decision to proceed.

• Okay on with the QT!

• Why hello there, fancy hot looking Ottoman prince dude.

• Looks like not one but both of my MCs will be living the thot life.

• Apologies for the huge delay guys. There was a LOT to unpack this chapter, and it took me a while to actually explore, confirm my research and get a clear idea overall of how I wanted to approach this one. I'm hoping once TRR ends I can get these babies out earlier.

• You know what I realised? The Lady Grandma LIKES a sassy bitch. There are several times this chapter she's actually been more approving of my headstrong Marianne than she has been of my more mild-mannered Florence. See all of this:

She's mostly approving of this, however, when Henrietta is the recipient of this behaviour, but there are also points where she appreciates the MC's candor (if she chooses to show it) such as if the MC refers to the art of the fan as "ridiculous". If there is one thing that consistently gets on Dominique's nerves, it is occasions where the MC might speak of herself and her former background negatively, mostly out of annoyance because it shows she hasn't comfortably settled into her role yet, and Dominique needs the MC to do so if Edgewater is to stay within in the family and bloodline.

• Also I love the subtle streak of independence we get to see in Annabelle. She is someone who is doing what is expected of her, someone who tries to make the best of her circumstances the only way she knows how, but she is also refreshingly open about how stressful it is for her to go down this path, even in her free scenes. She is also playful and mischievous and doesn't take herself too seriously, which makes a lot of her scenes a joy to do.

• I also really really liked the option where you tell her she's the one you want to marry, and her reaction is both a disbelief that such a dream could come true alongside a receptiveness to the idea. It's soft and sweet and beautiful.

• So we start out with a crash course on the nobility we'll meet in London (Alfred Halloway, whose daughter Felicity is debuting this season, and the Barrymore family, who are related to the Halloways by marriage). Only this time, Annabelle wants to be a snarky little boss and fill the MC in on all the juicy gossip that Lady Grandmother won't give her.

• Lady Grandmother: Alfred Holloway is the viscount of Lochdale. His daughter, Felicity, will be coming from her estate at Bellington Hall to make her debut this season.

Miss Parsons: Alfred Holloway is an arrogant prig who looks like an Easter ham studded with cloves.

(For the record, this is what a clove-studded Easter ham seems to look like:

Holy shit Annabelle you savage af)

Lady Grandmother: Miss Holloway's family is also tied by marriage to the Earl of Barrymore...

Miss Parsons: Oh, avoid the Earl of Barrymore. His bed has more traffic than Drury Lane!

Annabelle here must be referring to the crowd that tends to flock around the Theatre Royal, Drury Lane, which was popular as a source of entertainment for its plays and had a seating capacity of 3000 people.

• The free scene with Annabelle is important because it eases us gently into the main themes of her scene later on. The women get to speak about the whole concept of a "marriage market", and straight off the bat Annabelle lets us know how uncomfortable she is with having to go through a wedding to another man.

• She also speaks about what else - besides the fact that Harry was her closest friend - about his death affected her. Having been promised to Harry, Annabelle didn't have to go through the rigamarole of finding a husband. She had learned to settle with the idea of being married to someone who she knew and liked at least, if not loved. It's sad to us modern readers now that Annabelle would have to settle for less than passion or love, but back then I don't think she could have imagined a better deal. And now...and now she will have to settle for even less than what she had with Harry. This was a pretty neat way of easing us into the larger conversation she has with us in her diamond scene.

• A few days pass, and Briar is now helping us get ready for the trip to London. You have the option of encouraging her romance with Mr Woods, which...cmon. They cute 😊

•

Ooh so our House Colours are navy blue and gold! (considering that the Earl's default outfit itself is navy blue, I should have figured that would be a house colour). It's nice but MY NECK WHERE IS MY NECK.

Did You Know: that up until the middle of the 19th century, men's and women's riding habits were largely made by men in a distinctively masculine style. This is what Candice Hern's article "Regency Habits, Overview" on her website Regency World, says:

"Though the style and cut of riding habits changed with time and fashion, they continued to be tailored in a masculine style throughout the 17th and 18th centuries and into the early 19th century. In La Belle Assemblée in 1815, we read that: “Habits have, ever since they were first brought into fashion, been considered as decidedly calculated to give even the most delicate female a masculine appearance, and the wits of our grandmothers’ days were unmercifully severe on the waistcoat, cravat, and man’s hat which were then the indispensible appendages to a habit.”"

•

YOU'RE NOT COMING WTF DAD NO.

• WHO KNOWS WHAT THEY'LL DO TO YOU WHILE I'M GONE.

• I'm having a sinking feeling about leaving my old dad around in this house while Henrietta is still there, Grandma had better be his bodyguard (or maybe not. Cordonians seem to have weird ideas of what constitutes a successful bodyguard *COUGHCOUGH Mara and Bastien COUGHCOUGH*).

• Like most of the fandom I have a feeling the Earl will die sooner than we think. @i-dream-so-i-write once mentioned that it could well be towards the end of the book, and I think that's a fitting dramatic turn this book would take into the next. I'm going to miss the hell outta this guy though 😟

• Henrietta sent Mr Marlcaster and Miss Sutton ahead of time so they can screw things up for us, so we will need to butter them up like no tomorrow when we reach there, apparently.

• Hello Luke! It's been exactly one chapter!

• Kinda like the bonding the MC and Luke have with regards to the horse. Their first real conversation began with Clover, so it is fitting that their bonding continues over her at least for their initial interactions.

• Aww man, Henrietta wants Clover the horse to be sold and they give you a diamond option to keep her, name her and get extra scenes with her. Florence calls her Moonstone, Marianne calls her Pepper. Moonstone suits Florence's particular sense of whimsy, and I figured Marianne would want something short and snappy and it helped that Luke gave the horse some salt before the diamond option came up 😂

It's a fairly nice scene I guess, but it drives me batty because this book is already taking astronomical sums of money early on in the book, and people are already beginning to get frustrated. Even TRR, which is a pretty expensive book, took more than half the book before they pushed forward the option to buy the Derby horse. It just is beginning to feel like too much too soon at this point.

• Of all the free scenes this chapter, my favourite has to be the exchange among the four in the picnic en route London.

I found this particularly interesting because all of these people, so far, have been outside the rigors of the Season in some way or other. Briar is the most outside of this system of doing things: she has grown up completely out of it and will probably always struggle to understand the way things work within the gentry. Luke has spent years in that environment (that of the gentry) so he knows some of it, but he still is and will always be an outsider. Annabelle has grown up in this environment and is perhaps the closest to it, but has never had to take active part due to her association with Harry and the Edgewater Estate. And the MC straddles both these worlds. She is an heiress, part of this high society, but she was born in and more familiar with Briar's worldview. And I love how this scene captures all this in just a few bits of dialogue.

• Also Luke's sensible response to Annabelle's question and Briar being a teasing little imp is super cute, I will fight anyone who disagrees with me on this 😂😂😂

• So many gems nestled in Annabelle's scene guys I can't even. There's so much going on in this one. So much.

•

The main thing this scene does is to - without a doubt - establish Annabelle as a closeted lesbian. She's still at the stage where she's aware and finds it odd that she doesn't hold any affection for any man, that the idea itself of marriage frustrates her, and her growing confusion that she's now feeling for a woman all that she "should" be feeling for a man. There are points where she almost welcomes it, like the scene I mentioned earlier, but she still is clearly struggling.

The MC has three ways of responding to this - one where she misses the point completely and says "you haven't found the right man yet" (Marianne, unfortunately), another where she states that she "understands" (which is left open - either it is a gesture of support from an ally, or it is from someone who understands her dilemma to...well...some extent. Florence is the second. She is bi, so her "I understand" was basically "I've fallen for some men sure but I also have a hard time figuring out what my sexuality is"). My favourite is the response where the MC speaks of facing a similar dilemma in her life and is an excellent choice if your MC is also a lesbian. I couldn't use this one for Florence or Marianne because it didn't ring true for either of them, but I did see the screenshots on tumblr and it's quite poignant.

Did You Know: Lesbian/sapphic relationships and sex were not as much seen as illegal as invisible...and this was an attitude that a later monarch, Queen Victoria, would uphold as well, refusing to sign a legislation to criminalize it by insisting that "women do not do such things". Obviously as we all know, she couldn't be any more wrong. Today we know of famous lesbian women of the Regency as Anne Lister, owner of Shibden Hall, and the Ladies of Llangollen - two women from Ireland named Eleanor Butler and Sarah Ponsonby, who had a romantic relationship for over 50 years. Gail Eastwood, in an article titled "Queer in the Regency: a Slice of Once-Hidden LGBT History" says:

Defying their families, the two established an estate in Wales, called Plas Newydd, rather than enter into marriages with men they did not love. Though they incurred significant debt in order to have a staff, they survived on the generosity of friends until a fascinated Queen Charlotte convinced King George III to grant them a pension.

Plas Newydd became something of a haven for writers during the Regency era, especially since the couple living there could afford to keep it. 

Part of me wonders if elements of this story may be found in the Annabelle x MC route. Or like Anne Lister, who was well-endowed enough financially that she could refrain from marriage and have relationships with women. Maybe, or - given the limitations of having to chart out a storyline that will suit every LI - maybe not. Whatever it is, I'd be very interested in finding out how they'll handle the MC's romance with Annabelle.

• The second most interesting thing is Annabelle speaking about her poetry, and the restrictions her father has kept on her talent. She mentions him looking down on women's poetry as being "all bad rhymes and flowery sentiment", and that - in keeping with the times - he prefers Romantic Age poets such as Wordsworth, and that famous influence on Romanticism, Shakespeare. If we choose to ask her about showing us her poetry, she tells us her writing is "of a...delicate nature" (get it, girl! 😀) and if we choose to encourage her instead, the MC makes references to Mary Wollstonecraft, whose ideas of gender equality were considered radical for the times, and who is seen as one of the earliest feminist icons.

Did You Know: that in a time when female education was mainly geared to prepare women for their domestic roles, Mary Wollstonecraft advocated for women to receive an education that would help them survive beyond the home and the marriage market, stating that the one real barrier in the way of gender equality was the disparity in the education women received compared to men. She says, "this homage to women’s attractions has distorted their understanding to such an extent that almost all the civilized women of the present century are anxious only to inspire love, when they ought to have the nobler aim of getting respect for their abilities and virtues".

Her daughter, Mary Shelley, would write the famous novel Frankenstein in 1818, two years following the events of Desire and Decorum.

• Within this scene also lies a little tidbit that will hold some importance in Chapter 7: the MC tells Annabelle that her mother used to sing in the opera:

So this could be the root of some of the snarky remarks Henrietta makes about the MC's mother. She has close pretty darn close to calling her a "prostitute" on more than one occasion, and her comment after the MC sang along with Annabelle in chapter 3 about how it was "no wonder" that the MC could sing, given her mother's profession.

Did You Know: Opera singers had a very different reputation in the Regency era, not all of it very positive. Shana Galen, who is described as a Regency adventure author, speaks about how opera singers were viewed at the time: Of course, it was perfectly acceptable for a young lady to show her talents on the pianoforte or to sing in front of a small group of family and friends, but performing on the stage at Drury Lane or Covent Garden were frowned upon.

Female performers, especially, were shunned by society. One example of this sort of attitude was seen in the ridicule faced by a singer named Dorothea Jordan, who had an long-running affair with a Duke, bore him ten children, and who was the subject of a "satirical cartoon that showed her in her bedroom, gazing adoringly at a duchess’ coronet, which she hopes someday to wear by marrying her lover. A map on the wall purports to show the route from “Strolling Lane” (i.e. prostitution) through “Old Drury Common” all the way to “Derbyshire Peak.” A genealogical chart of the nobility lies on her dressing table, and her bed-hangings are crowned by a Phrygian cap, symbol of the French Revolution. The latter is intended to ridicule her pretensions to nobility; as a common woman, let alone an actress, she should know her place" ("Glimpse at Opera during Jane Austen's Lifetime" by Maggi Andersen, for the blog Historical Hearts).

• Luke's scene on the other hand is lighter in content but is important if you look at it from the viewpoint of establishing his role in the MC's life before they reach London. As a neutral friend, he is happy to serve her and considers her a vast improvement over Countess Henrietta. He tells her that she possesses what Henrietta lacks, understands something that Henrietta would never understand in several lifetimes: that looking down on people she believes as her 'inferiors' will leave her at a disadvantage eventually.

But if you hint at having feelings for Luke, the entire mood of the scene changes, and you see him feeling torn between his growing affections for her and his recognition that any relationship beyond the professional will end badly for them all.

• The thing with both Luke and Annabelle is that to not fall for them is to maintain the status quo. So even if there is an element of attraction, the MC not reciprocating does not tip the delicate balance that governs their lives at Edgewater over. But when she does...it gives rise both to moments of joy...and moments of fear.

• Ooh I love the animation for the train!!

I mean...just...look at this!

• The MC and Briar get to react in awe to their first sight of London before they get down from the carriage. We find out that we're pretty much stranded on the streets of London and no one has come to pick us up. Gee thanks, stepbro.

• Not gonna lie, but seeing Prince Hamid's shocked!face on his full-body shot made me giggle a little.

• He introduces himself as Imperial Prince Hamid, cousin to "his Imperial Majesty Mahmoud the Second, Caliph of Islam, Sultan of the Ottoman Empire, and Custodian of the Two Mosques (the last especially was used in royal titles for many Islamic rulers, and refers to the Al-Haram Mosque (al-Masjid al-Ḥarām) of Mecca, and the Prophet's Mosque (Al-Masjid An-Nabawī) of Medina).

• In a sense he kinda reminds me of Kamilah: he is a fictional character positioned as being related to an actual historical figure, so they will give us plenty of background about the countries they were from (Egypt and Turkey [Istanbul in this case], respectively) but keep the actual historical figure at a distance. Making the fictional character a cousin and a person of an important position in that court is a smart choice to make: they're important enough to represent the royals of the times but distanced enough that it doesn't seem unnatural if they aren't that close and ergo can't tell you personal details about said historical figure.

• Did You Know: Sultan Mahmud II (the cousin Hamid mentions) was seen as quite a progressive ruler of his times. 1829 onwards, he tried to bring many, many reforms into the Ottoman empire, including (according to the Encyclopedia Britannica article on him) "adopting the cabinet system of government, provided for a census and a land survey, and inaugurated a postal service (1834), introducing compulsory primary education, opening a medical school, and sending students to Europe. In addition, the sultan’s right to confiscate the property of deceased officials was abolished, and European dress was introduced". It looks like some elements of this way of thought could be reflected in Hamid, from his talk of diplomacy in his diamond scene.

• Hamid not only positions himself as a bit of an outsider to England but also as a man who travels: talk of travelling and seeing the world is his ice-breaker when they get into the carriage. This will allow him not only to help familiarize the MC with London, and his home Constantinople, but also give her (and us) a view of what the world looks like at this point. For instance, if the MC speaks of even London is unfamiliar territory to her, he mentions the Blue Mosque, the construction of which was completed exactly 200 years prior to the events of the story.

• The other very essential point of this scene is to provide a bit of a parallel to Luke, but also as a counterpoint. Luke is disadvantaged both by his class and his race - ergo he has a very layered perspective. Hamid has privileges, but he is also aware of and in some ways used to the reception he gets in England, and has figured out how he wants to respond. Both Luke and Hamid find their ways to cope with their situation, and the MC is allowed - according to the ethnicity chosen for her - to relate to both.

Florence, for instance, relates heavily to this as someone is visibly a foreigner even though England is the only home she has ever known. Marianne does not fully understand this, but she can tell him like any decent human being would that she thinks it's wrong of people to treat him that way.

• Just prior to this the two manage to see the Tower of London, notorious for the imprisonment and execution of many, many people including royals and nobles. There is a short but rather poignant conversation on the "many people tortured and murdered over who had the right to sit on the throne" (among the people executed, you will find names like Anne Boleyn, Thomas More, Lady Jane Grey, Guy Fawkes and Walter Raliegh).

• Did You Know: For a long long time in England, executions were seen as a bit of a spectator sport. The more unusual the criminal, the bigger the crowd. The Capital Punishment UK blog speaks of the kind of atmosphere usually present around the time:

In many counties, executions were held on market days to enable the largest number of people to see them and school parties would be made to attend as a moral lesson, something which is certainly recorded as happening at Lancaster Castle.  Public houses and gin shops always did a very brisk trade on a hanging day.  

However, attitudes towards executions experienced a shift around the late 18th-early 19th century, and by 1864 Parliament established a Royal Commission on Capital Punishment, with a declaration that executions would take place inside the prisons rather than in public.

I'm not sure if this was intentional, but possibly the MC's and Hamid's reactions to the tower may be reflective of their times.

• Interestingly, Annabelle is shown to look jealous if you've been romancing her, and giving you a sly grin if you're just friends. I quite liked that little touch. Luke meanwhile is a little less open about how he feels at this point: whether you're romancing him or not, he is described as "watching you carefully" during your exchange with Hamid.

• So Mr Marlcaster got the letter from the Duchess to send a groom for picking the MC, but didn't...as per his mother's demands, surely. But AT LEAST you should have been a little prepared to answer me in case I dropped by anyway, dude? Instead of just standing there and staring at me like a scandalized goldfish.

• Looks like Edmund is still going to try screwing things up for us, and we'll need to find a way to get him on our side. After all, we get relationship points with both him and Theresa Sutton, and Lady Grandmother did tell us we could find a way to get them to be with us rather than against us.

• I'm looking forward to Chapter 5...but it's Chapter 6 I REALLY want to see. We're going to learn a bit more about the MC's mother's background!

General Thoughts:

• OMG so much was there to unpack this chapter!! A lot of it to do with Annabelle and Hamid, and Luke has taken a bit of a backseat this chapter but I'm hoping that's a taster of what's to come in his case.

• Look I love this story but IT COSTS SO MUCH. WTF. Keeping Clover was a nice option but it really added nothing to this chapter and could have easily been shifted elsewhere. I want this book to do well. I'm happy with how they're writing it, the effort they're putting into their research and into their characters so far...and I would hate for it to not be appreciated because they made it so hard for people to get into the book by making it this expensive so early.

• Florence is going for Annabelle and Luke (leaning more towards Annabelle at this point), and Marianne for Hamid and Sinclaire (I'm not sure yet but Hamid is a very very strong contender!!). Who would have thought I'd have my first polyam MCs in a book on Regency Era England!! Who woulda thunk!

• Annabelle particularly intrigues me at this point. She is clearly established as both inside and outside of this system, and vocally critical of it at least to the MC. She writes about her desires against the chargin of her father, and states that she doesn't want to merely settle into a 'safe' relationship like her mother, not unless she can know and trust that person (which is mostly why she agreed to the match with Harry even if she didn't love him). She is confused, and open and honest about her confusion. I really think the foundation of this character is immensely strong, but they really need to keep working on her and not just drop their efforts on her halfway. And I've seen that happen enough times with female LIs to be afraid.

• At this point, we now have three male LIs (one Master of Horse who is African-American, one family-approved eligible bachelor and one prince of the Ottoman Empire) and one female love interest. Is there space for one more confirmed female LI? I sure hope so but at the same time I don't want keep my hopes up.

However...IF the plan is to keep just one female LI, then they'd better do a pretty darn phenomenal job of her. If you're not going to give wlw players other options it's only fair to make sure the only option is given really, really good writing - consistently. They're doing a good job so far...but there's a long long way to go before I can fully trust PB to do justice to her.

• That's it for now! On to Chapter 6!

• Tagged: @boneandfur @liamraines @thespiritpanda @alanakusumastan @ernestsinclairs @private-investigator-nazario @bcdollplace @thedepthsremember @mcbangle @queenodysseia @novaelaras

If you'd like to be tagged on these QTs, do let me know! 😀

[realtalk-princeton]

To Maybach -- Anon 2023 again. Honestly, my other major option is Brown (and Penn, but that's out by now) and I'm concerned that I'd be sacrificing happiness if I choose Pton. "Happy" is a part of the Brown brand, whereas "ahhhhh" seems to be a part of Pton's. I want the name and the opportunities Pton would afford me. I suppose that's not a question, but how would you respond? Do you understand what I mean? Is it so awful to pick Pton 4 name/opportunity (in addition to the other stuff)

Sorry for the delay everyone, I just got caught up in a lot of obligations. Due to multiple popular demands from both pre-frosh and current students, I decided to structure my Brown and Princeton story in the following manner. In the first section, I’ll give my background context prior to starting college and my feelings throughout the years on the subject. In the second section, I’ll specifically address the above question in more detail with my many thoughts on key distinctions between the two schools. I think the combination will serve the purposes of everyone quite nicely. Lastly, if any pre-frosh ever want to talk to me, feel free to reach out and ask for my contact information. Or even better yet lol, I just remembered that PREVIEW started, so I guess it might be easier to just talk in person to me. I actually don’t even have class tomorrow haha. I just think that talking is sometimes easier than writing and also in these responses sometimes I have to speculate. For example, I can pretty safely state that if a pre-frosh is almost certain of being a pre-med, Brown is probably going to be a much less stressful experience, but I have no idea if this applies to you beforehand.

So anyway, even though it was four years ago, I still remember it like it was yesterday. Boy time flies. I was not the most studios or stand-out HS student. I wasn’t the valedictorian or salutatorian of a rather small school far away from major cities. While some Princetonian HS students spent summer doing lab research at universities, I spent mine goofing off with friends and traveling. We used to actually have a bonfire at the end of the school year and burned stacks of our HW up to 4 feet high lol. When it came to applying to college, I did not actually even again acceptance to NYU or BC lol even though my stats were more than up to par. I guess maybe they were concerned that I wouldn’t be a very hard-working student. Luckily, I am very fortunate that despite coming from an extremely educated family (grandfather and mom went to Columbia, Dad went to Berkeley, etc.), my parents never put that much pressure on me. So as you can imagine, I was super excited when I heard that I got into Princeton, Brown, Cornell, and some other schools. For a period of time, I was actually getting ready to go to Brown. My SO at the time had committed to URI and I was psyched by the super expressive culture of Brown. Students prided themselves on being true to themselves and also took full advantage of freedom with responsibility. The location was close enough to NYC and some kids from my HS were already there. I always hated excessive structure and authority growing up and the prospect of 70%’s A’s granted, no +/I’s, and pass/failing anything was totally alluring! On a side note, I always laugh when they say that people don’t abuse pass/fail and use it only like 10-15% of the time. Well, maybe that’s because they’re already handing out A’s like it’s water and all A-’s become A’s haha. But anyway, I was psyched. Who wouldn’t want to live at camp Brown and take it easier than HS, but still be guaranteed a legit degree on your resume? However, after I visited Princeton, connected with a large number of alumni, and actually started putting real thought into my education, my perspectives slowly, but surely started to change. I think what I really underestimated was the power of the Princeton degree and how impressive our alumni network truly is. The people I met and still meet to this day are absolutely brilliant in several respects (e.g. they aren’t just nerds in one subject) and many are focused on maximizing their impact and allocation of influence in this world. The alumni donation rate is nothing short of incredible and the chance to be part of this network was alluring. I remember meeting a guy actually who got waitlisted and was already attending Duke when he got the chance to go to Princeton. He lived every moment to the fullest with his academic pursuits, the social network of brilliant, but diverse persons, and solid career plans. Anyway, it just became more clear to me over time that while Princeton was rigorous, it’s academic qualities could be much more intimate and engaged than Brown and the intellectual horsepower of its students (mostly) created truly incredible and impactful people. Jeez lol I forget sometimes how many alumni we have on the SC, in politics, business, arts, etc. At Brown, all they do is gush over Emma Watson in an almost cult-like way (sarcasm). But anyway, I was getting pushed as you can imagine, but I was still worried as I wasn’t the best HS student and grade deflation had literally only ended the year before. But eventually, the offer was just too good to pass up. Once you become a Princeton student, your life truly does change and people will treat you give you credit solely based on this fact (whether it’s right or wrong is another story). I remember before I even committed, I was hanging out at the Princeton Club in New York and a few days later some of the guys (who literally knew me for like a few days), invited me out and basically paid of lunch at Smith and Wollensky and lauded me on my “accomplishments” lol and how they could always be resources to bolster a Princetonian. Pretty soon after I committed.

As for answering your specific question, I’m already seeing red flags. Whenever you choose a school for the name, that’s setting yourself up for a bad time. Yes, our opportunities are better. Look at the difference in endowments lol. It’s like that for a reason even though they have way more students and more grad schools. It’s also reflected as well in our post-graduation salary averages. Brown is more creative with RISD and it’s curriculum, but that doesn’t always equal more opportunities. Princeton has the most power and resources of any university on a per-student basis and gives us an incredibly powerful brand and network. That said, you should probably explore why you want to go to Princeton other than the name and brand. One of the miserable people I know picked Princeton over another school because it was the “Best” school she got into and that’s just not fun when you didn’t research enough beforehand. By contrast, I know someone who turned down Harvard for a small liberal arts school in the middle of nowhere and she had an amazing time. If you feel like and click with Brown’s social scene, that’s another reason for not going to Princeton. Academically, Princeton is better for people who want rigor and want to truly maximize their learning in a short period of time and be around amazing minds. Our depth is much better than Brown’s and it shows with how strong our students are in critical thinking skills both inside and outside of their majors. However, there is a downside to this. For example, if you want to major in physics at Princeton, you better adapt fast or be damn good at it. You can’t just “love” physics and be relatively bad at it (compared to your peers) to succeed here because we teach you to be the best students possible from professors who literally wrote your book. At Brown, sure you don’t learn as much or go as deep, but you can major in almost anything because you just aren’t held to the same standards. So there’s a tradeoff. If I majored in Brown’s business program, let me just say that I would not NEARLY be perceived by others to be so intelligent (even though I’m not lol). I know the kids in the degree, it’s not like they are dumb, but jeez lol is it a joke a bunch of the time. Relating sociology to business for example on the surface can seem like a good idea that teaches people until you actually see what they’re writing and working on. I would probably have a 4.0 without working as hard too. And I don’t mean this to mean I’m like super smart or anything. It’s just not comparable to Princeton. However, I am super blessed and thankful that I did take Economics here seriously. The kinds of critical thinking skills and the ability to analytically dissect complex multi-faceted problems that I have developed serve me very well and I feel so rewarded. I literally got a position at a hedge fund with no experience at all because the interviewer liked how I wrote a research paper on guns an applied rigorous statistical analysis in many novel ways to answer new questions. This is no different in many ways than using public information using novel techniques to find value where nobody else sees it. But overall, I think that I’m feeling Brown for you unless you are willing to work harder here for greater depth of learning. I just want to say too though that despite me working hard, I still don’t pull-allnighters almost ever and I still have achieved very high grades. You don’t have to be a genius to do well here. Take it from me. I had piss-poor test scores (by Princeton standards) and was not a valedictorian, but if you are strategic and work reasonably hard and are disciplined, the work is more than doable. I don’t want to brag because I think it promotes bad culture, but you ought to know that a student like me can succeed academically and perform at the top of their class without working in the library all the time. So you should really evaluate what kind of learning experience you want and where you will be most likely to be happy and healthy. Some people just want a break after HS and don’t care about going super deep into their learning development. That’s totally fine, but then Brown is probably better (assuming you also like the culture). Some people would really abuse Brown’s system, not really learn, develop unhealthy and bad habits, and be kind of bored. In that case, Princeton is better. It really depends on you, but if all you see here for you is a name, you’re probably shooting yourself in the foot coming here.

Anyway hope that all helps. I can answer specifics if you have them too.

Edit. also I realized how long this all is and noticed that maybe some of you should just call me or I can connect you with people I know who love Brown lol. It’s sometimes harder to write these things and express everything properly compared to like a 30-minute dinner conservasation. Just putting it out there. I’m also exhausted lol from staying up until 4am the past few nights for this huge deal coming up. I did this tonight so that I wouldn’t mess up my sleep schedule any further and avoid taking a nap lol.

[roggling]

Are you open to high school AUs? If so, I'd love to see a fluffy Kallura fic where Allura hurts her ankle playing soccer in gym. Keith carries her to the nurse and waits with her for her uncle Coran to pick her up. The next day when she returns to school on crutches, she asks Keith to be the first to sign her cast. :)

Gym class in Altea High is always abuzz. Kids run around and tackle each other down on the football field, others, including Keith, dribble balls across a court, others running across a tennis court to hit a bouncing yellow ball, others just walked around the area to watch the others played, others, including Allura, run across a field kicking a ball into a goal.

Allura was a teenaged professional soccer player. Kicking a ball since she started to walk was a major factor in her “career”. She was a force to be reckoned with in the field. Her speed dizzied whoever confronted her and she whizzed past defenders with ease. She was fluent in the art of kicking balls (in both ways). 

Her athleticism granted her an impressive form and had caught the attention of numerous specimens of the male species. Some of them being the biggest douches of Altea High who deserved a kick to their … areas.

So, naturally, Keith would have hated her. He typically hated rich kids who are spoiled and who got everything they wanted and who were naturally great at everything. I mean, he hates Lotor, and everyone loves Lotor (except for Lance, but he’s just jealous of Lotor’s hair). And he would have hated her if Allura wasn’t so nice. 

Mayor Alfor Prince is known for his diplomatic skills, who skillfully stopped a Daibazaal uprising without any drama starting by forming Voltron, a city in between Daibazaal and Altea where both had equal power. So, it would be understandable if Allura inherited those same leadership skills. 

It was still surprising, though, to see her defend Puig, the small, scaredy cat janitor, from Sendak‘s insults. She didn’t full out insult him, she played to his weakness and brought up Lotor, making Sendak see red and leave the fight alone. She skillfully evaded a disaster, leaving nothing in her wake. 

Then, he formally met her and he was hooked. He didn’t like it at first, and he was intent on making her think he did. It didn’t work.

And, jeez, it didn’t help that she was so beautiful. Her silver hair, although strange, was mesmerizing and complimented her skin perfectly. Her eyes are just -agh. Really, Keith couldn’t explain the attraction he had for the Mayor’s daughter, but all that is important is that he’s whipped. Which is unfortunate since he’s been friend zoned since the eighth grade when he officially became her friend after he came to watch her soccer game with the rest of their friend group.

So watching your crush fall and cry in the sport she excels is concerning. What is also concerning was the speed at which Keith ran in order to get to her first. She sat on the grass, her left leg folded in, her right laid straight out, and she grabbed at her ankle.

Keith kneeled next to her and held her back to help her in her position, “Allura! Are you okay?”

Allura winced, “My-My ankle! It hurts!”

The gym teacher, Coach Krolia (aka Keith’s mom), ran to Allura’s aid and felt the area around Allura’s ankle, immediately stopping after she screamed. Krolia grimaced and turned to Keith, “Keith, take her to the nurse’s office and make the office call Coran. I think she sprained her ankle.”

Keith nodded and helped Allura up from the floor. Once she stood, she attempted to take a step before she fell over again, only surviving due to the fact that Keith caught her before she fell. She groaned again as she let most of her weight on Keith and Krolia chastised her, “Allura! You can’t put any sort of pressure on it!”

Allura pouted and tried to hop on her foot, but she only passed half a foot of distance and Keith got a brilliant idea. He wrapped Allura’s hand around his neck and lifted her bridal style. She froze and blinked in the surprise of Keith’s sudden movements, and she could hear the rest of the girls squealing.

She looked up at Keith’s violet eyes with shock and confusion lacing their gaze and he smiled down at her (earning another wave of squeals from the rest of the girls) before he explained, “You can’t put any weight on your foot and it’ll take you forever to walk with one foot. We can get there faster this way.”

Lance scoffed and yelled, “Liar!” from the back of the crowd before being smacked by Pidge. Keith looked around sheepishly before walking out of the gym with Allura holding on tightly to his neck.

Halfway to the walk to the nurse’s office, Allura cleared her throat, “Um, thank you for taking me to the nurse’s office, Keith.”

He looked down and his brooding gaze turned into one of cute shyness and he mumbled, “No problem.”

Allura smiled and she teased, “You know, you’re not so bad when you’re not pretending to be emo.”

Keith looked down at her like a deer caught in headlights and Allura laughed, “You’re actually really cute.”

Keith flushed and hoped that this would be over soon, he didn’t need Allura ruining his reputation. Allura laughed and continued, “Of course, I already knew that.”

Keith sent an angry pout down to Allura, “’Lura, what’re you trying to say?”

Allura leaned up and kissed his cheek, “I’m saying you should let the real you slip through once in a while. I like the real you more.”

Keith froze and looked down at Allura in his arms, a smile gracing her face when his eyes traced her soft features. He cocked his head to the side, “Maybe, we’re going to have to see if I’m up to it.”

Allura pouted playfully and rolled her eyes, “Pwetty pwease, Keith?”

Keith looked down at her and demanded, “Only if you’ll come with me to the movies this weekend.”

Allura smiled, “It’s a date.”

After the nurse checked on Allura and handed her an ice pack, Allura was sent outside and she was forced to hop (the security guards glared at Keith when they saw him carry her). Keith stayed with her, of course, until Uncle Coran could go pick her up.

As the two waited on the benches outside the school, they saw Pidge approaching them from afar to bring Allura her things and the two braced themselves for the obvious teasing they are about to get.

“You know, Allura, I don’t think you had to sprain your ankle in order to get Keith to wrap you in his strong arms, he would do that willingly.”

The two sighed.

Once Pidge left, Allura comfortably laid her head on Keith’s shoulder and reached for his hand. Keith obliged and intertwined their fingers. Keith leaned into Allura, his mind still trying to process the fact that she likes him back.

“When did you start liking me?” His question was so quiet, Allura would have missed it. 

She thought for a second before answering, “The first time I met you. On the outside, you seemed so callous and cold. I thought for sure you hated me,” Allura teased and Keith pouted, “But then, that very same night when Lance invited me to join you guys at the fair, you gave me your jacket and I saw you for who you truly were.”

Keith smiled and responded her unspoken question, “I guess I started liking you before formally met you. When you defended Janitor Puig from Sendak’s bullying... I wasn’t expecting such ballsy behavior from the Mayor’s daughter. I guess, you proved me wrong and threw my assumptions down the drain. Ever since then,” Keith gazed into her eyes, “you’ve never failed to amaze me.”

Allura smiled and leaned in to plant a soft kiss on Keith’s lips before pulling away and whispering, “Finally.”

Unfortunately for them, the little kiss initiated a flurry of kisses between the new couple and Coran caught them. His exuberant and loud personality didn’t help their embarrassment and the security had to force Coran to leave and forced Keith to return to class.

After that, and a few texts later, the two decided to reveal their new relationship to their friends tomorrow. Keith and Allura both went to sleep with smiles in their faces.

The next day, the two walked in the school together, though, they refrained from any physical contact so they can have the element of surprise. Keith carried her bags down the halls and they met the rest of the group in the cafeteria, where Pidge was eating breakfast with Lance’s jacket covering her small frame, Lance was animatedly waving his hands around and having Hunk listen to whatever his rant was about, and Shiro was nodding off.

Keith and Allura both sat in front of Lance and Pidge and they immediately stopped to address themselves to Allura.

“Can I sign your cast?!” Lance asked excitedly.

Allura chuckled and shook her head, “I promised Keith to be the first one to sign it.”

Keith smirked at Lance and Lance stuck out his tongue. Keith took out a sharpie and Allura lifted her casted foot for him. Keith covered the cast so the group couldn’t see what he was writing and they all tried to look over his shoulder, but none of them got a peek.

Then Keith finished and he pulled away and capped the sharpy. He looked up at his girlfriend mischievously and smirked as the group gasped in surprise. Allura sat down and looked at what Keith wrote in her cast, “GET WELL SOON, BABE.”

Allura smiled at Keith and Keith leaned in to capture her lips in his. Allura smiled into the kiss and lifted her hands to pull at Keith’s hair. The group was left mumbling incoherent sentences and the couple ignored them.

...

Well, except when Lance screamed, “YO, KEITH’S FINALLY GETTING SOME ACTION!”

Keith had to flip him the bird for that one.

[punkscowardschampions]

Jimmy & Janis

Jimmy: Alright? Janis: Not too shabby, Jimothy Janis: How about you? Jimmy: Been better Jimmy: You know 😏 Janis: Goes without saying Janis: we both make do like but all things considered Janis: think it was 'reet' as you would say Jimmy: You're so full of craic Jimmy: No wonders I miss you already like Jimmy: But yeah it was alright Janis: 🍀 Janis: Take the compliment even though with present company its not asking much of me is it Janis: No shade to Cass or Bobs Jimmy: Want another, do ya? #thirstyworkthis Jimmy: Full of 'em thankfully Janis: Who you calling thirsty?! 😉 Jimmy: Denying it? Jimmy: Bold move Janis: Your word against mine Jimmy: Fair. You are louder than me Jimmy: Gonna get drowned out Janis: 😳 Janis: Prick! Janis: Not my fault that you just grunt like a caveman at all times Jimmy: If you aren't about it, do something about it, mate Jimmy: Just saying 😏 Janis: Ha.. what, teach you proper English? Janis: Not sure I got the time or dedication to the cause tbh 🤔 Jimmy: Nah you haven't got the vocab 🇮🇪 Jimmy: Need more than 🍀 is the drama Janis: 🖕 Janis: Drama is the only subject you're about, more like Janis: not working with an unwilling pupil Jimmy: You can't be my muse across every subject, mate Jimmy: So thirsty like Janis: Ugh Janis: I hate you Janis: So glad you're not here now Jimmy: Can't shut me up from this far away though Jimmy: We both know you've got means otherwise Janis: Such a blatant hussy Janis: all becomes clear now 😂 Jimmy: Skerries brings it out in me Janis: Well what happens in Skerries, like Jimmy: Shit. Hang on Janis: Okay Janis: Is it? Jimmy: Sorry Jimmy: As you were Jimmy: What did I miss? Janis: Damn, didn't hear me lamenting under ya window? Janis: Guess the thirst isn't THAT real Janis: You good? Jimmy: Funny Jimmy: Shame you weren't, could've caught me when I was tempted to throw myself out dramatically like Janis: That bad then? Janis: 'Cos you went away, like? Jimmy: My dad just had a weekend worth of opinions he simply had to share with me about how I've been spending my time Janis: I can imagine Janis: You aren't free childcare though Janis: I know my fam are lax about certain shit others aren't but he is taking the piss Janis: Right? Jimmy: It isn't like I even mind about looking after them, he's acting as if I'm desperate to be rid when I'd rather have 'em than leave them with him Jimmy: None of us wanna play happy families with him and his missus Jimmy: Have your fucking alone time Janis: Soon to be asking that, gotta be realistic Janis: Esp. with how little he's given the kiddos re. you're Ma Janis: What a headfuck, can't just transition seamlessly, son Janis: and as for the rest of that shite, he just KNOWS that'll make you feel guilty, Jim Janis: I don't know anyone who puts as much work in with their fam, he's not got a leg to stand on there, just knows what'll work on you, that's all Jimmy: yeah Jimmy: it fucks me off though, it really does Jimmy: Feels like ages since we went away already and I'm only just back through the door Janis: I know Janis: Sometimes I wish we could just take 'em and leave for good Janis: Not really though, I know that's a lowkey fucked thing to wish considering Janis: Not trying to be an insensitive cunt, just hate it when he gets to you, if I could do something about it forreal, I would Jimmy: You do Jimmy: Not trying to make you feel awkward bout it but you do really help me Jimmy: I wouldn't be able to hack half as much of this if you weren't about Janis: 'Course you would Janis: You did before, like, since you was 13 Janis: That's mental Janis: Don't usually wanna gas you up this much but you're fucking strong, and I know you had to for 'em but still are Janis: Own it, big 'ead Jimmy: Alright Jimmy: Still wish you were here though Jimmy: Or we were there Janis: Duh, I'm a delight Janis: and not going anywhere anytime soon so Janis: you're in 🍀 Jimmy: About time I had some Janis: That's the spirit Janis: just hit your Da with that quality bants 😎 Janis: won't have no comebacks, I bet Jimmy: 💪🏆 Jimmy: Sooner I can get my own flat the better Jimmy: Debating jacking school in but then who'd be there to get Mr Lucas' rocks off Janis: Won't someone please think about Mr Lucas n his needs?! Janis: Such a hero Janis: Forreal? Be a shame, like Janis: Not just for the art department Jimmy: I know. I wouldn't get to spend all day eye fucking you for starters Jimmy: 🎻 Jimmy: I dunno, sometimes it's the only peace I get from dickheads, kids and mad dogs but they aren't paying me to be there like Janis: Can't have you using your skillz on the CG punters instead Janis: Get restraining orders or their order over ya like Janis: Makes sense though, shame there ain't a compensation scheme like Janis: Maybe you could get run over and then say the Dr fucked you over Janis: double bubble Jimmy: Get your nan round to beat me up again Jimmy: Have a go too, be a hero, mate Jimmy: If anyone asked there was loads of 'em and I didn't see a single face, sorry Janis: 😂 Janis: and defs not a pensioner and a teenage girl either like Janis: probs the 'RA after you, like Janis: sell that shit to The Sun, boyo Janis: full of good ideas, me Jimmy: Quality Jimmy: I am gonna have to get another job at least Jimmy: any ideas there? Janis: Hmm Janis: Lets put our heads together Janis: What are your skills, Mr Taylor? Jimmy: 😏 Janis: 😒 Janis: There's a market for it Janis: Mia could be your sugar mama, play your cards right Jimmy: I'd happily go broke in that case Jimmy: Live in this box room forever like Janis: You got principles now? Janis: Didn't have 'em when you was sucking face with Tam 🤔 Interesting 😂 Jimmy: When Mia's concerned it's called common sense Janis: Don't reckon you got staying power to be nothing more than another flavour of the month? Janis: She does go through them, admirable in a way given all she's seemingly working against Jimmy: I know I haven't Jimmy: Kissed goodbye to my new boy appeal ages ago Janis: I dunno Janis: I still reckon you're alright Jimmy: 💕 Jimmy: Cute Janis: 🤢 Jimmy: [Sends a picture of Twix] Speaking of Jimmy: Absence has made the heart grow fonder for someone Janis: Real MVP Janis: been wearing you out instead of her Janis: You owe her, like 😜 Jimmy: I'm gonna bin off school Jimmy: I can make it up to her then Jimmy: Just for the day, keep calm dad Janis: Lol, really prove his point, like Janis: Teen's prerogative Janis: Fair though, I'm pretty knackered Jimmy: yeah why not Jimmy: you don't wanna come over to keep us both company then? Janis: You don't have to ask Janis: if you just wanna 💤 Janis: Not gonna be that bitch Jimmy: what kinda bitch you gonna be Janis: I've not decided yet, watch out world Jimmy: Keep me posted Jimmy: Twix needs to get a jump on her competition Janis: Look, baby girl, if its a competition between you and school then it is none Janis: but the lad here needs a break Janis: I'm soz 💔 Jimmy: 😎💪🏆 Jimmy: Challenge accepted Janis: You turning sleep into a sport now? Jimmy: Have you seen Twix when she gets going on a dream? #Athleticaf Janis: Aww 😍 Janis: why you taking on the champ, gonna have you picking up her shit- oh wait Janis: s'a dog's life forreal Jimmy: She was the one being #goals all along Janis: Truly Janis: can I come over actually Janis: I want to Janis: Call me thirsty all you wanna Jimmy: I want you here too Jimmy: We're even Janis: What was that? You actually admitting defeat? Janis: 😮 Janis: Never thought I'd see the day, Taylor Jimmy: Don't get used to it, like Jimmy: But I do owe you one for sorting Skerries Janis: I'll take it Janis: Even if it was hardly selfless of me like Jimmy: I'm alright with you being selfish if it means getting away from the shit Janis: Easily sorted Janis: S'my default, ask the fam Jimmy: I would but I'm gonna see how long I can carry on pretending families don't exist 😎 Janis: Not gonna say challenge accepted when you're being a good boy Janis: but I like the sound of that too Janis: plus, unfair, numbers wise Jimmy: You are at a disadvantage Jimmy: Never usually let that losing streak stop you though Jimmy: 😏 Janis: Fuck off Janis: Selective memory sore loser 😒 Janis: I got this in the bag anyway, you can't be cunty to kids Janis: I'm away there, all my fam be grown...ish Jimmy: You're gonna have to jog it for me cause all I see in my past are wins, mate Jimmy: Not that you can trusted if you've forgotten how much of a dickhead I am Janis: I know you find it hard to keep up with me but Janis: at least try, mate 😉 Jimmy: Don't have to. I'm a natural at beating you Jimmy: 💪🏆 Janis: 😑 Janis: I feel its my duty to inform you this isn't how you make girls like you, you know Janis: otherwise your chances of getting a new gf to stick are slim Jimmy: It's alright I don't want a new girlfriend Jimmy: And I know what works on the one I've got 😏 Janis: What a charmer Jimmy: You aren't denying it 😎 progress Janis: What's your game? Janis: Suspect Jimmy: No games Janis: Yeah right Janis: got my eye on you boy Jimmy: You always do Jimmy: 😎💪💕 Janis: 🕵 you're a shady character that's why Janis: could be a 36 y/o russian spy Jimmy: 😲 Jimmy: with this face? rude Janis: deep cover Janis: obvs want me for the olympics cos why else Jimmy: busted Janis: fans gonna be gutted Janis: never mind will they won't they Janis: rollercoaster from fake start to fake end Jimmy: We're gonna need new #s Janis: #whendimitriisnottheone #comradeBYE Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: I'll get the vodka shots in Jimmy: Win you back like Janis: Not that easy Janis: but not gonna say no Jimmy: #thirsty Janis: how did we end up back here Jimmy: Too true for you to keep avoiding, mate Janis: what you think Janis: queen of avoidance Janis: won't see me for dust Jimmy: I'll see you tomorrow, babe Janis: Only by proxy Janis: 'cos my true love is there Jimmy: 🎻💔 Janis: Don't worry, we can still have mindless sex Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: Alright Jimmy: Done Janis: Heart healed real fast Janis: Called it Jimmy: I'm easy Janis: Didn't wanna say it, kid Jimmy: Ask Tam she'll tell you Janis: I bet she would Janis: Unlike you I do my best to avoid her though so no tah Jimmy: Don't know what you're missing there, mate Janis: Ha, you can get fucked Janis: I'm not having a threesome with you and Tam Janis: not even for the #drama Jimmy: what about for the #craic? Jimmy: You'd be lucky anyway she's only about me 😎 Janis: So jealous 😒 Janis: Twat Janis: How about a mmf threesome, bet YOU ain't so keen now Jimmy: Depends who you're considering Jimmy: If it's Mr Lucas I'm well in Janis: All fun and games now but you know he'd be way too down Jimmy: 😒 Jimmy: Too real Janis: Mhmm, that mouth gon' get you in trouble one day Janis: what am I gonna do with you, eh? Janis: 😇 over here Jimmy: I'm the bad influence like Jimmy: Take that dad Janis: Yeah, I'll just tell him, like Janis: Problem solved Janis: Please him no end having to have a chinwag with me 😂 Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: done deal Jimmy: not like we're trying to avoid him or owt Janis: oh, just thought we were trying to avoid our own, like Janis: there goes my bruch goss sesh Janis: gutted Jimmy: Keep up, mate Jimmy: Gotta totally isolate ourselves for that teen angst cliche Janis: Umm Janis: 🚩 Janis: are you going to tell me next that no one else cares about me but you? and that I need to block everyone and give you my phone Jimmy: You can tell your fam that next time Gracie's blowing up your phone Janis: I'd pay to see her rescue mission but Janis: I'll let it get to the danger zone before I do anything, standard Jimmy: Fair Jimmy: Can't fault you there Janis: Give you time to get proper creeper Janis: up ya game Jimmy: I'll take that Jimmy: Challenge accepted as per Janis: G'wan then Janis: Don't scare easy Jimmy: I already figured that out Janis: Clever boy 😉 Jimmy: have my moments Jimmy: Don't even need school, see? Janis: Still wanna jack it in then? Janis: Let Monday pass, see how you feel Jimmy: I don't wanna really Jimmy: Just being a crybaby about being stuck under this roof Jimmy: 🎻 Janis: Fair Janis: I feel it Janis: You can always squat in the barn if you're quiet Janis: won't charge you Janis: much Jimmy: I can be quiet Jimmy: If you don't blow my cover we'll be alright Janis: Excuse me Janis: I'm stealth as fuck Janis: you know you got caught the other day yeah Janis: was saving your ego but Jimmy: Nah Janis: Did so Janis: you know Gracie got her 👀 peeled for you forever Jimmy: Damn Jimmy: Should've known that she'd still be obsessed with me Janis: You? Okay 👌🍆 Janis: watch you don't rub your shine off dickhead Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: Thought you'd be buzzing she's switched her allegiance like Janis: Still not getting rid of her is it Janis: Unless you both run off into the sunset and leave me in peace Jimmy: Yeah alright Jimmy: You've got Twix you'll be sorted Janis: Like you give a fuck Janis: finally getting the twin you wanted all along like Jimmy: Naturally Jimmy: Just playing the long game Janis: Bit of a weird way to play it but Janis: this your usual approach? Jimmy: You're the first twin I've dated Jimmy: Lucky Janis: I really feel it Jimmy: [Sends a pic of Twix looking adorable] Jimmy: Bet you do Jimmy: 💕 Janis: Look at what you coulda had Janis: now you're gonna have to get a pug with my sister Janis: sad Jimmy: More of a cat person anyway like 😏 Janis: are you trying to get with my mum? Janis: sicko Jimmy: Nah just over mad bitches, you know Janis: Defs wanna avoid this entire fam then Jimmy: Nah their alright Jimmy: And not just by comparison Janis: Hmm maybe from the outside looking in Janis: They aren't but what am I gonna do, emancipate myself? I've got less cash and less of a place to go so not the brightest of ideas Jimmy: Guess we're stuck Jimmy: Twix has a lot of love to give but fuck all cash Janis: Preach Janis: Useless sugar daddy Janis: should take a leaf out my sister's book clearly Jimmy: Bit late for that Jimmy: You're too loved up Janis: Nah Janis: Tell Twix to speak for herself Jimmy: [sends a voice clip of Twix howling] Jimmy: Done Janis: 😂 Janis: aren't you in enough trouble rn boy? don't start her off! Jimmy: She's a bad bitch Jimmy: Can't be told Jimmy: I blame her training meself Janis: Oh, Twix, where you gonna go? Think on, girl Janis: Get what you pay for Janis: You want results, you gotta cough up for my services Jimmy: You can't need new kicks already, mate Jimmy: I know you've been shopping like Jimmy: The social's got you exposed Janis: What makes you think I was paying? 🤔 Janis: Mean she didn't buy you a 'round? Shame Jimmy: I know you weren't Jimmy: Gonna pay when Twix hears about it though Janis: Sure the flat whites are already hunting her down too Janis: Awkward Jimmy: Tam's probably trying to stretch her skin into a suit as we speak Jimmy: She's gonna need a touch of your luck I reckon Janis: Not your usual type, long and lanky then? Janis: That'll be a toughie but she's nothing if not determined, bless her Jimmy: Dunno I can't remember Jimmy: 🤷 Janis: Nice Janis: Such a gent Jimmy: I wasn't trying to be Jimmy: She bumped into me and we had a dance to make it less awkward Jimmy: Far as that politeness went Janis: No need to lie 😂 I'm not the one that's gonna be crying about it Jimmy: No need to be jealous cause I'm not Janis: Whatever, weren't together Janis: not against any unwritten rules or other shite Jimmy: Still Jimmy: If you were jealous, like at Cass' party, no need to be Janis: You what? Janis: I weren't, you were being rude, that's all Jimmy: Alright Jimmy: 🤷 Janis: Always wanting me to be jealous Janis: 😒 Jimmy: Nope, just saying Jimmy: I'm that dickhead like Janis: What dickhead would that be? Jimmy: A jealous one Janis: Nah Janis: You ain't Janis: why would you be? nothing to be jealous about Jimmy: Forget it Janis: Can't say that, never works, like Jimmy: There's a first time for everything though Jimmy: Worth a go Janis: 🤷 Janis: fine, hit you with the shrug right back Janis: be like that Jimmy: I'm not being like anything Jimmy: I just don't wanna say it. Okay? Janis: Alright Janis: What do you wanna say? Anything? Should I go? Jimmy: Don't Jimmy: It's not your fault like, being too good for me and that Janis: Are you mental? What are you even chatting Janis: Fuck leagues, not even playing the same sport, and I ain't bragging Janis: For once Jimmy: Bollocks Jimmy: You're fucking stunning like, and that's just looks Janis: 🙄 Janis: Please Janis: that's the start and end of my qualities Janis: don't even make the most of that, like Jimmy: Shut up Jimmy: It isn't Jimmy: And you don't need to, that makes it worse, or better depending on the lens you're viewing through Janis: I've told you, I know what I am Janis: Ain't under any illusion I'm a catch Janis: Not fishing for sympathy like Jimmy: I'm not throwing any sympathy out Jimmy: Or compliments, just facts Jimmy: You are a catch, mate Janis: Blatantly not 'cos no one else thinks or has thought so Janis: what I'm saying, there's nothing to BE jealous about Janis: no one gunning for you 'cos I'm off the market, is there Jimmy: Only cause they can't compete with how #goals we are Janis: Yeah, that's the joke Jimmy: It doesn't have to be Jimmy: I'm not laughing Janis: No? That might've been your reality but it certainly hasn't been mine Janis: There's a reason I was a 'dyke' with no friends, and those reasons haven't disappeared Janis: You would laugh, you do Jimmy: No Janis: Forget it Janis: I'm using mine now too Jimmy: Don't Jimmy: I don't want you to forget what I'm trying to say Jimmy: Even if I am messing it up Janis: you don't have to Janis: say anything Janis: just 'cos I'm being a fucking sad case Jimmy: I want to Jimmy: There's so much shit I wanna say to you, alright? Janis: But you don't know how? Janis: Alright, Liam, fucking hell Jimmy: He was on to something Janis: Maybe Janis: 😏 Janis: You don't need this though, my shit ontop of yours, forreal, so you can forget about it, alright? Jimmy: I'm not that much of dickhead Janis: Ugh, can't you try? Janis: Always claiming the title and now where is it when we need it, eh Jimmy: Sorry Jimmy: Got no control over it like that Jimmy: Basically none around you, like Janis: You mean that? Janis: No bullshit, no bants? Jimmy: You know I do Janis: Good Janis: 'cos me either Janis: and I am jealous, really jealous Janis: and you know that too, I know Jimmy: That's why you have to hear me out Jimmy: There's no reason to be Jimmy: I swear Janis: Alright Janis: I'll try Janis: Its not personal, but I know its shitty to be on the other end of it regardless Jimmy: Good Jimmy: I can't lie now, I quite like it Jimmy: Nobody's ever been that bothered about me before Janis: Well they're thick then Janis: I Janis: I dunno Janis: Not had anyone to myself before Janis: that I wanted to keep Janis: not letting go easy, like Jimmy: Don't Jimmy: Me and you. Alright? Jimmy: That's how I want it Janis: Alright Janis: I wish we had a place to go now too Janis: Bad Janis: out of the question storming out in a teen angst rage tonight? Jimmy: It's out of the question for me not to Jimmy: I'll take the car Jimmy: Find us a place Janis: You're already in trouble I guess Janis: Lets do it Janis: I'll be waiting outside Jimmy: I'll be right there Janis: 👌 Janis: what are our chances of sneaking me in though? 🤔 seems silly to come back home only to come back tomorrow like Janis: up for the challenge? Jimmy: Put a coat on it's freezing out Jimmy: You know it 💪🏆 Janis: Cute 🖤 Janis: but as I've pulled, will do Jimmy: Funny Jimmy: Got the car keys that's the first hurdle like Jimmy: Don't even need luck Janis: Thank God, like Janis: just that good, yeah? Jimmy: Yeah Jimmy: 💕