#I'M SO DEAD I CRIED FOR HOURS

[lotus-pear]

do you finally see me?

[arthursfuckinghat]

There needs to be a scientific study done on how Rockstar Games' Arthur Morgan is able to provoke the most earth shattering emotions I didn't even know I had in me

[a-scary-lack-of-common-sense]

I am exhausted, good heavens.

[helenofblackthorns]

today was the last day of classes (ever) at my university, the eclipse, and my grandfather died 🙂👍

[necrotic-nephilim]

Fandom: DCU (Comics) Rating: Explicit Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Dick Grayson/Bruce Wayne, Tim Drake & Dick Grayson Characters: Dick Grayson, Bruce Wayne, Tim Drake (DCU) Additional Tags: Omega Dick Week (DCU), Omega Dick Grayson, Alpha Bruce Wayne, Omega Tim Drake (DCU), Unhealthy Relationships, Manipulation, Porn With Plot, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, Grooming, Bad Parent Bruce Wayne, Rough Sex, Breathplay, Consent Issues, Mating Bites, Mating Bond, Protectiveness, Protective Dick Grayson, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, Painful Sex, Pre-Flashpoint (DCU), Bittersweet Ending, Spanking, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Barebacking Summary:

Dick had accepted his relationship with Bruce was fucked up and probably unhealthy. He was okay with that. He even had enough self-preservation to refuse to be Bruce's mate for that reason. But when Bruce turns his attention to Tim, Dick's instincts for Tim show him exactly how little self-preservation he has, if it means protecting someone else from Bruce.

-

Omega Dick Week 2024 - Day 4: Protective Instincts

[crimeronan]

entering the kind of depression era wherein posts encouraging people to think of nice things in their lives make me start crying because i can't think of anything except for things that also just make me hate myself (ie: my family is very nice to me about how i'm too fucking useless to do my job or chores or errands or anything other than lay in bed). probably i will end up logging outta this blog if this continues for much longer because i don't really like who i am currently nor do i have the capacity to pretend to be anything else anymore and i'd prefer to post on this blog when i can actually, like, perform personhood adequately. if i do vanish in the coming days you can assume i'm taking a normal sabbatical unless papika or faewaren post that i'm dead/hospitalized/whatever. peace and love genuinely thanks for all the support ✌️💕👍

[moe-broey]

Therapy notes

[vwritesaus]

dear summer,

i would like to wish you

a very FUCK YOU.

[jamiemaybeme]

i've realised why i'm so scared of losing my friends: an essay of sorts

(this is long btw. there's a tl;dr at the bottom if you really care lmao. also people's names have been changed to their initials, and they're in pink so you don't read them as actual words accidentally)

i think at the end of year six, sh and il moving away left a sort of gap. and i think i tried to ignore it. i kept in contact with them. i texted sh for a year. her forgetting who i was felt like the biggest betrayal ever tbh. i know she just moved on, but i develop such deep platonic connections to people. at the time, i didn't realise this. i mean, i was 12/13 years old, struggling with lockdown and my mental health, i didn't have time to figure out WHY it hurt. i just knew it did.

as the world came out of covid, i started to form relationships like this again. with js and dr, mostly.

come year nine, and i'm in a class with lf. we start to hang out more. shit happens. we don't hang out anymore. but we're still friends. my friendship with dr was brief. i liked her, but i think her ability to shit talk people just immediately threw me off. more shit happens. i don't hang out with dr anymore. lf eventually starts to hang out with us again.

year ten, and i'm in the same class as just lf. and we spend so much time together. i also am in the same dt class as aj, who starts to hang out with us as a group around january i believe?

fast forward to now (end of year eleven). it's coming up to five years since year six ended. it's been about three years since sh stopped texting me back. it's been around two and a half years since i last saw il. it's been two? maybe?? years since things started to return to 'normality'. i've accepted the loss of my primary school friends. it took nearly half a decade. but i did it.

but i don't want to do that again. i don't want to go through the pain of not seeing these people i care about and love so deeply everyday. i struggle to make new friends. i didn't used to. but ever since covid i've changed. that sounds so dramatic and kinda corny, but it's true. i don't want to lose contact with lf. i don't want to never infodump to aj again. i don't want to stop speaking to js. i've found my people, the ones i'm comfortable with. the ones who are my home. it's taken so long, and i CANNOT lose that. i don't know what to do.

i'm bad at staying in contact with people. i forget to text them back. i get scared they don't want to talk to me. i never have any time. i'm always busy. i over commit. to people. to hobbies. i'm very much an all or nothing person. and that's why losing friends hurts. but i don't WANT the moral of this to be "oh i'll get over it in time." i want the moral to be "i will make the biggest effort possible to keep in touch with these three people."

i see bears in trees and i know callum and iain met in primary school. i know callum, iain and nick have been friends since secondary school. and i want that so badly. i want to go to the same uni as my friends. i want to buy a house we can all live in together. i want SO MUCH and i can't have it all. i'm jealous of what they have. i'm jealous they managed to stay together. i don't cope well alone. and i have such a deep love for and bond with my friends that if that breaks i don't know where i'll be. i don't know what i'll do. i don't know who i am without them, to be completely honest. maybe that's a bad thing, but i don't really care. they are everything to me. just like sh was. just like il was. like dr could have been. like [my sister] is, but also not quite like that.

it's why i've asked if we can make music together. i want something that keep us connected. because if and probably when i leave [my school], what do we have? what do we have? we have nothing. nothing except a bond that i hope will hold strong against the test of time. i so badly hope it does. i don't want we don't speak anymore to be relatable. i want it to stay nothing but a fear. i need my friends.

tl;dr: i'm a little bit emotional and i'm scared of losing people i've dedicated my life to

(i exceeded (well reached) the tag limit lmao)

[hyuuukais]

literally WHYYY do i do this to myself.

[psilactis]

how many doctors can a person go to, reasonably, and not become insane from it

[hbghq]

if someone's willing to pay for my twitchcon ticket i will physically drive to vegas and give you a kiss on the mouth

[fingertipsmp3]

The class went better and worse than I expected

[dcxdpdabbles]

DCxDP fan fic Idea: Danny Fenton's Ex

Danny wants to know that he did not go looking for a fight. He merely wanted to have some of the best hot dogs this side of the USA, in Tucker's words. The human world had changed a lot across differnt timelines but his best friend had assure him, this one was particually tasty.

He planned to pop in, hunt down the street cart filled with buns and meat, then pop out of Gotham. He was meant to visit for less than an hour at most.

He just happened to be at the wrong place and time. It really wasn't his fault! Danny had been minding his own business, using a paper map on the edge of a tall building (his phone had broken in the last ghost fight. Not that it would do any good since it wasn't connected to any living towers), squinting at the streets below, hoping to figure out where he was. The next thing he knew, an angry child leaped out at him with a sword.

Of course, he defended himself! The kid was doing some insane slashes in the air, and Danny had fought enough samurai ghosts to know not to underestimate how powerful a katana indeed was. He had been able to beat the child, encasing his arms in ecto-chains, after a full half hour of combat.

Danny had been dead tired- pun not intended- but just as he thought he was done, a second child had leaped out at him. This one carrying a bo-staff. It took another thirty minutes to beat this one, and just as he was gearing up for a lecture, a third child appeared.

She was wearing all purple and seemed to favor strong kicks. Danny had the bruise to prove it, but just as he could take her down—and stop the other two from escaping since they were attempting to do so—he was attacked by an actual shadow and her red bucket-head friend.

Now, those two were difficult to beat, especially when it was two vs. one. Shadow reacted as if she could predict all of his moves before he even made them, while Bucket Head made incredible shots with his guns covering her attacks.

Danny had already been expelled from his other two fights, so it was a miracle he was able to trick Shadow by allowing more of Phantom to bleed into his fighting style. She couldn't predict the dead!

He ended up on a roof with five children- okay, more like a child, two teenagers, and what could be the early twenties, but they were all young to him. Each was tied up securely with some of his own ecto-chains and glaring- he could feel the hate in their eyes even behind their masks- trying desperately to catch his breath.

"Oh boy, I'm not as young as I used to be. " He gasps between huffs. Maybe Sam was on to something when she lectured them for not having enough greens, normal exercise routines, or even taking vitamins. They really weren't teenagers anymore. "Ugh, I think I pulled something. I need to lie down..."

Just as Danny is allowing himself to slide to the floor, two more shadows jump at him. This time he's far too tired to dodge, and the blue one manages to land a drop kick to his chin. The force has Danny spinning in place, losing his balance, and slamming hard against the roof.

The tied-up children cheer, and if he wasn't a walking bruise right now, Danny would be half tempted to show them all a round two.

"Great Gatsby!" He cries out of reflex, rolling onto his back, ready to take a swing-

"Danny?" a new familiar voice cuts in. The sound is something Danny will never forget, even after all the years they have been apart. He used to fall asleep to that voice, muttering into his hair and warm arms wrapped around him, making promises never kept.

Danny whips his head around to see a man in a bat costume. He squits, studying the strong curve of a very familiar jaw and his voice-

"Wayne?" He blinks. Those lips- so familiar and different all in one- curve into a surprise, but please smile. Yes, that is definitely Bruce.

"Danny, I haven't seen you since-"

"You broke up with me through a letter on the hotel note-pad? A note-pad that I had to pay for since you touched it!?" Danny hisses, suddenly energized with pure, unadulterated rage. The man freezes.

"I, uh, see you're still upset about that." Wayne winces, shuffling on his feet- Bruce Wayne, the little human he found wandering the Infinite Realms, rescued, helped, trained, and had become human again to have the man dump him to "find himself."

Danny knew he found a lot of ladies on his self-discovery trip. He never forgave him. It has been embarrassing to have to return to the Realms to his friends' knowing eyes and his sister's sad shrug.

You knew a human could never understand or live with beings like us. We aren't like them anymore. She had told him. It was bond to end in disaster.

"What is happening?" The bow-staff kid asks

"I don't know, but I don't like it," Blue tells him.

Danny ignores them to glare at the man. "What the hell are you doing here, Wayne?"

Wayne frowns. "You used to call me Bruce."

"I used to do a lot of things, Wayne." Danny stands, gesturing to the group of people he has captured. "Can you kindly disappear again? I'm in the middle of something."

The man makes no move to leave. Instead, he tilts his head. "Those are my children."

"Of course they are." Danny rolls his eyes. "Tell them to not attack innocent tourists-"

"Are you here on vacation? Would you like me to give you a tour?"

The familiar words- the ones from their first date- make rage boil in his core. "Oh, go burn in the worst levels of hell!"

He doesn't stick around for a reply, twisting in a tight circle and ripping a hole into the Realms. He ignores Wayne's call of his name; it's too late- fifteen years too late- and shifts back into Phantom.

He prays he never sees that deadbeat again. Or the family his wife gave him. Not that Danny cares; it's been years, and he could care less what Bruce Wayne and his stupid kin got up to.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

"Bruce, I say this with all my heart, what the fuck was that?"

"That was the one I let get away."

There is a moment of silence before Damian speaks up. "I demand to be taken out of my misery. Mercy, kill me now, Drake."

[wardrobemoments]

huh?? what the hell happened

[peachesofteal]

pls let Simon hold that baby 🥺

Light on - single mom/neighbor fic Simon Riley/female reader 18+ mdni / mild suggestive content, mention of spanking - could be considered mildly dark and twisty

"Oh, you came!"

What? Yes, he came. You invited him, didn't you? Wasn't that... did he get this wrong? "Er, yeah... I thought you said-"

"I did, I did. Come in." You step to the side, allowing him entry into the hallway where the smell of something incredible lingers, pulling at the pockets of his cheeks. You can cook. Judging by the scent of roast chicken and herbs that fill the room, he knows immediately that you're better than the 'subpar' dinner you mentioned yesterday. "You just ah, seemed unsure. I didn't want to assume." His hand pats his pocket instinctively, seeking the mask, trying to fight the urge to pull it over his face, pleasantly surprised you don't seem off put by his face, or the fact that it's the first time you've seen him without it.

"I had some things going on today, wasn't sure about my schedule until a few hours ago." Lie. It's a lie, a bold faced one. He knew he'd be here from the moment you had rushed out the invite, offering to cook him dinner as he dwarfed you inside your cozy apartment, dead smoke detector batteries in his hand.

"Well, thank you for coming. And thanks for all your help yesterday. I couldn't figure that stupid thing out to save my life." You laugh, teeth exposed, easy and carefree. A shiver ricochets down his spine. Why you let him inside your flat the first time, he'll never understand. Maybe one day, he'll reprimand you for it. Chide you for letting a stranger inside your home, remind you to be more cautious. He would explain why you need to more careful, more observant of your surroundings, as his thumb rubbed away the fat tears falling over your cheeks, the result of him taking his palm to your ass a dozen times for the slip up. Can't be makin' mistakes like that, love. Not with it just being you and the baby when I'm not here- he'd tell you, make you promise not to do it again, soothing your tears with cool cream against your skin and gentle, but firm, reassurance.

You just need someone to take care of you, that's all. Teach you.

Emmaline makes a noise, a half babble, half cry, and it breaks him from his reckless daydream, bringing him back to reality in a matter of seconds. What is he thinking? You're his neighbor. He doesn't even know you.

"Thanks for inviting me." You're bent at the waist, hands pulling a roasting rack from the oven, perfectly cooked bird sitting on a bed of potatoes and carrots, and his stomach rumbles almost loud enough for you to hear.

"I owe you. That beeping would've kept little miss here up for hours." You jerk your head in Emmaline's direction, where she's fixated on you, mouth hanging half open. "Needs a few more minutes." You mumble to yourself, and then turn around again. "Do you want a drink? I've got some lagers, and a bottle of wine somewhere." Your fingers knot together, words on the tip of your tongue hopeful, almost... nervous, and you give him another smile, albeit this one is less confident.

"A lager would be good." He tries to settle you by being agreeable, and you produce two from the fridge, your fingers brushing against his when you hand one to him, skin warm and so, so soft, the kind of soft he's rarely felt, the kind that feels like silk against sandpaper. Yours against his.

"So, you said you travel for-" Your question is interrupted by a shriek, a demanding cry from Emmaline, her little fists waving in the air at you, like she's indignant about the redirection of your attention. You pick her up, yellow jumper bright against your red apron, and you shoot him an apologetic grimace. "I'm sorry, I was hoping she'd be down by now but, she's just been so fussy lately." You bounce her back and forth, cries quieting until she's just blinking at you with wet eyes, and the timer on the oven goes off. "Shit. Ah..." You look at her, and then look at the oven. "Can you, would you mind?" You extend your arms, Emma inside them, and he puts every piece of his training to use trying to control his reaction.

His heart soars.

His brain panics.

"Yeah, okay." He says, and you dip forward, pushing her into his arms. He knows how to hold a baby, held Joseph plenty, and she seems to agree, settling in against his chest, hands grabbing at his sweatshirt, tugging and trying to eat the fabric. She's light, lighter than he expected, but still sturdy, and when her lips shift into a gummy smile as she makes eye contact with him, he feels everything logical inside him shutting down.

Beautiful baby girl, and her perfect, sweet, angel of a mum.

He'll be keeping you.

He'll be keeping you both.