Even a month after reading it, I’m still taken aback by how dark the metal virus arc was, cause not only did all the main characters go through tons of grief, but we also see a glimpse into how other characters feel that aren’t apart of the main cast.
The poor girl, who knew she was infected, and despite that she tried and pleaded not to be left alone, cause the world was falling apart, she was losing everyone she loved, and she was scared. So the last thing she wanted was to be alone. Seeing this kind of feeling displayed in a sonic comic of all things filled me with dread, cause it felt oh so realistic, cause I know people in rl would react the same way.
What makes it worse is that she was screaming and crying up until vector, who definitely didn’t want to do this, but knew that if he didn’t, more people would be hurt, picked up a car and slammed it onto her, crushing her. And if she hadn’t turned into a sombot after this point, that impact would have killed her.
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ajsskj tell me why when stick said something along the lines of “oh boohoo my dad died and i’m burrowing my sorrows between the legs of some supermodel” to mock matt, my sad little brain went omg imagine being matt’s sweet neighbour that stick’s observed him interacting with - seeing how obviously in love with he is and turned on by you - and saying instead “burrowing my sorrows between the legs of some neighbourhood skank” just to get that much more on his nerves.
hnngggg and it works bc matt immediately comes to his unofficial and oblivious to his infatuation girl’s defence and gets much more hostile.
and the next time he sees you!!! you’re being your usual sweet and helpful self with him and matt can’t help but pile on the praise and thankful touches which have always just been an excuse to touch you as if you’d heard what stick said about you. just one example is how he makes sure to emphasize how “this is perfect sweetheart, thank you.” and his hand rubs your arm. “you’re perfect… you know that, right?”
and it drives him crazy how fast your heart starts beating and flustered you get and interrupts your soft “i mean…” with a firm “you are” as if you not believing just how completely perfect you are was an insult to him.
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So what do you do when your favourite rapper makes a catchy song about the hardships of life that you want to love but upon release can’t connect with at all and after a few listens almost outright dislike because none of the pain and hardship life has put you through has ever made you a better person or given you the energy/motivation to do better and it actually just did the complete opposite and you’ve lost out on precious years of your life and so many opportunities while trying to process the trauma and undo the damage
But everyone else seems to love the song to the point that you start to wonder if maybe you’re just a fucking idiot for not being able to make something good out of said trauma and hardship instead of just being filled with crippling anxiety and depression and bitterness and grief and rage
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I wish I could go back and tell younger me that I would in fact find that place one day full of people that I adore deeply and who I know love me in return. Who make me feel wanted and cared for and appreciated in a way I never thought would be possible. And none of it required hiding, or forcing myself to be a person I’m not. And I still have that space even though I’m aroace.
For the first time ever, I see a future where I’m not alone. And I wish I could go back and tell my younger self it would happen. It’s possible to not be constantly lonely.
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on day 2 of my social media detox, my screen time is down to 75 minutes, i’ve been bored for the first time in forever and i didn’t think i would miss pinterest the most (but i do)
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Well, I’m still glad that Gojo was always a character who was growing and learning at least. He’s literally one of my favorite characters of all time now. Like, he’s never been as perfect as how the fans would make him out to be despite canonically being viewed as an absolute nuisance to everyone around him (I don’t think his peers necessarily hate him but a lot of them probably hate to see him coming and the ones who’ve dealt with him long enough to consider him a friend, tolerate him and groan whenever he opens his mouth, too 😭… out of love. He’s extremely childish so there is only sm the other adults around him can take and to an extent, his students. I think the only characters in canon who adore him and their eye’s sparkle whenever he’s around, and being a silly teacher was Yuuji and Miwa (she asked him for his autograph (he’s the most famous sorcerer in the jjk world) and when she was alone, she did a little dance in the empty hallway 🥺…) from what we’ve seen even though the others still care about him, too. They just find him rather annoying, which he most definitely is. And he does it on purpose. He plays too much.)
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idk how to start this so this post is ab individual action, trying to motivate positive change in the world, etc etc
a lot of growing up in the US for me makes things feel more scary than they are. like it’s actually not that difficult to go out of your way to get a bottle of water or iced cup of water from some random drive through if you think you should do it. either fast food conglomerate or local actually, it’ll usually be cheaper than 5 dollars to get drinkable water. i try to have 5-10 dollars i can justify spending on water, and asking for change, because sometimes when i’m out driving i need to go grab water.
i do not do this for me as much as i try to do it specifically when i see someone who’s most likely homeless on a street corner. i’m sure one day i might do this and they might not be there when i come back, but what have i lost really? a bit of time and a bit of money that would’ve meant more to them, that i can hold onto until i see them next.
the pressure that a lot of people feel when they think “what can i do” comes from this grand narrative that the average citizen can singlehandedly fix the housing crisis. rich people? maybe. nonprofits? not in a day, not all one person still. what can i do is a question i ask a lot. what can i do, not just because it feels bad to move along like nothings wrong with the world, but what can i do that will do anything. what can i do that makes even the smallest change.
i feel like it took me too long to figure out a personal method to what i consider individual action. it’s taking time to get to my own financial stability to be able to do more. but for now it’s as simple as water and cash. not water and food, but water and cash.
individual action means a lot in small steps, go get a bottle of water bare minimum and the price of a meal if you can and then just give it to them. if it wasn’t such a miserably hot place where i live i would keep a pack of water in my car, which i still want to do for the sake of having immediate access to water to give someone who might need it- hot or cold sometimes won’t matter. but when it’s hot out, get cold water, if it’s cold out, a warm tea will hydrate more than coffee will as long as it’s not super caffeinated.
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