#I’ve been trying to post this for like a billion years omg

[poopiefart420]

The Phoenix represents destruction and demise, the necessary upheaval of old and crumbling systems.

[youngbugandtonystank]

You missed the point people were trying to make about tony not supporting the other avengers... peter, who is also an avenger has advanced tech and financial support from tony and he left the rest of the avengers with nothing. Its selfish and stupid because sam, wanda and bucky deserved better from stark. He ruined their lives and even dead he's being an asshole to them dykwim

You and I definitely saw different movies lmaooooo also can’t believe I had to go to the urban dictionary to know what ‘dykwim’ means.

So first, all of you are mad because Tony is throwing advanced technology at Peter to protect him. For years, I’ve been reading the same old crap ‘OMG, I want this Spider-Man as far away as possible from Tony because he’s giving him money and tech!’ and now, conveniently, it’s ‘OMG, look at Peter, he got to enjoy Tony’s tech/money and my fav character needs to have some of that same money I criticized before just because!’

And you need to watch the movies for real, stop reading summaries online, and following whatever DarkLordSpidey1 from Twitter says. He basically worked for these people:  

Redwing (upgraded by Tony Stark and previously named Stark Drone). He also got another upgraded one after those 5 years; ‘Well, you know, those poor techs can't keep up with a billion returning IP addresses and your sick-ass Stark-level tech’. He also made an advanced and technological version of the EXO-7 Falcon for Sam with a freaking weapons system.

The super high-tech Quinjet the rogue Avengers were navigating in while being war criminals belongs to Tony as well. 

The Hulkbuster was specifically made to help Bruce Banner.

The Black Widow's bite was upgraded and given to Natasha by Tony too. Tony also made Black Widow's batons, as well as the stingers.

 Upgraded Cap’s shield and involved magnetics to keep it on his wrist and back. Let’s not forget he upgraded this shield three times for him. He also protected Steve with three different uniforms and added features that made it better for him, each more durable than his previous ones, being capable of withstanding repulsor blasts and more.

He designed a new bow for Clint, added an infrared and sonic-sighting device onto it. The next version that Tony made for him after that one had the capability to transform into a bo staff which could be used for melee combat. He also received an upgrade in 2023. Basically upgraded all of hawkeye's bow and quiver weapons.

Made two uniforms for Wanda to protect her in battle, gave her a home, and supported her for 2 years until she decided to become a war criminal. She freaking calls The Avengers Facility: HOME ‘The Avengers compound. It was the first home Vision and I ever shared’. Same as Steve, he refers to the compound as home in IW. Tony gave them all of that.

While all of them were gone, Tony was working on a prototype for Cap's new shield and continued to work for them. He even kept their stuff safe for them. And for all the crap you give Peter, take into consideration that Thor's magic belt along with the team's equipment was about to be stolen in HOCO, some of you better be thanking that kid lmaoooooo

Who do you think supported the Avengers financially for years? Nick Fury? HAHAHA! Fury is up in space having a vacation while Wanda was holding a few John Does hostage. He gave them a home for years, imagine unemployed adults capable of fighting aliens and terrorists being supported by just one person. And the place where they lived was not a tiny room with some old ass furniture. It’s a whole Ikea luxury compound; a hundred acres with a lap pool and a screening room with the most advanced tech and accommodations possible. 

Also weren’t yall calling the compound where they comfortably lived for years a ‘prison’ when Civil War came out and you were talking about how ‘oppressed’ Wanda felt over there? I still remember yall saying the Rogues didn’t need Tony’s help after CW and they were better off with T’Challa because he's richer and lives in a kingdom? Even T’Challa dropped their asses and let them live in crappy hotels for 2 years. And now you want Tony to throw money at them? THE TRANSPARENCY LMAO

Just admit you didn’t watch the movies and move on.

And this? What the hell is this?

He ruined their lives and even dead he's being an asshole to them

Tony barely knew Sam and I think I already explained why is ridiculous to blame Tony for that bomb. Also, I would argue that Wanda herself ruined her own life with her decisions, which is 100% canon. If you want to argue more, here are some posts (I don’t feel like explaining myself all over again):

x, x, x, x, x.

How exactly Tony ruined Bucky’s life? By having him kill his own parents? Is that it? LMAOOOOOOOO Tony had nothing to do with Bucky’s life, they were never friends. They barely knew each other. 

yall really want Tony Stark to be everyone’s sugar daddy.

[hanniiesuckle17]

Dating Seo Changbin

A/n: I am so sorry this took so long!!! i hope you like it <3 oof its been a while since I've done this style so here we go

Requested: @mrsunshine999

Tag List: @distrikt9 @mini-meanhoee @poeticallyspaghetti @hanstagrams @desertofdessert @hoes4hoseok @yangomangos @jeonqqin @geminirules @crscendoforsung @mrsunshine999 @jisungsjheekies @hannie-squirrel00 @cotccotc @multi-net​

Warnings: cussing, changbin being best boi, 

First of all....reader you are one lucky bitch.

Dating THE changbin

damn

Changbin is definitely one of the more domestic boys

He thriiiives with being a cuddly soft boyfriend

You probably met his parents on like your fourth date

But it was like a surprise thing 

He was like “Stop by my place because I’ve got to take care of somethings before we go out”

and you were like sure whatever so you get there like twenty minutes early and knock on the door

changbin opens and says you can wait in the living room while he is grabbing some things

first of all you notice his house is super fuckin nice

you’re like “mental note to ask who his decorated is” 

so he goes off and you walk in the living room and there are his parents just looking at you with kind expectant smiles

and you’re like “ummmm.........hello........changbin’s parents....”

changbin is like walking in and out of the room completely unaware that you are lowkey shitting your pants because omg his parents are right there and you were not prepared for this you were just promised food

its then you realize this is his parents house and he freaking tricked you into meeting them

by the time he sits down next to you on the couch you’ve practically sweated through your nice outfit and answered a billion questions

“I told you, I pick good ones mom- OW!” 

you pinched him really hard and made a nervous look towards the door. 

He laugh and got the message

the two of you said goodbye and you proceeded to whack him very hard the second the door closed behind you

loves to spoil you

anytime you're mad at him the next day you find a very expensive flower arrangement as well as a nice piece of jewelry on your desk or doorstep

he never lets you pay for anything

in fact the most common argument you have is about him spending too much money on you or not letting you pay

one time after a really big fight he secretly paid your rent for the month (which led to you yelling at him again)

“CHANGBIN YOU PAID FOR MY RENT?!”

“I thought I was doing a nice thing!”

“Yes it was very nice but I want to do things for myself!”

“But you’re so....baby....my baby....I wanna take care of you.”

“I AM NOT BABY!”

he thinks you look really cute when you’re mad so you never really end up getting anywhere with arguments like that

changbin is definitely a huge cuddler

likes being both little and big spoon

his favorite sleeping position is probably you sleeping on top of his chest so he can hug you like a teddy bear (you have replaced Munchlax haha)

probably takes you on the most aesthetic dates

he loves being your personal photographer

he can’t show you off on the skz insta so he probably has like a separate private account just to post really cute pictures of the you and him

changbin is a huge fan of couple clothes 

like any kind

his favorite is finding couple shoes like sneakers. 

he likes knowing that he could wear them onstage and bring a piece of you into the public view but its like his lil secret

changbin is like super no no about scandals so after a few months he probably announces the relationship before the press even think he is in one

changbin is like the pinterest boyfriend 

like he strives to be pinterest worthy

the boys give him so much shit about it but like lowkey he doesn’t care he just steals their coffee or something in revenge

he probably keeps like special products for you in his apartment

he always has the coffee or tea you like stocked in his kitchen

changbin is definitely the type to love hard and love fast so once this boy has you locked down in a relationship he just goes all in

you two probably move in together pretty quickly because this boy is just so anxious to be around you all the time

lowkey whiny once you move in 

“y/nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn!”

“changbin you've said my name like 18 times what the hell do you want”

“i wanna hug.”

tries to use aegyo to get out of chores and housework

“I love dark my ass.” you say shoving a laundry basket in his arms and watching him pout 

late night gym dates at like two in the morning

the boys lowkey getting jealous of how much time he spends with you

Felix and Hyunjin basically live at your apartment

you don’t know how they got keys but somehow they are always there 

you’ll wake up one morning and felix will be randomly asleep on your couch for no reason

your dates are often crash by one of the boys but you honestly don’t mind because they are so much fun

changbin is actually the most caring and empathetic boyfriend

he always seems to know when you have a bad day or are just feeling bad about yourself

sometimes you don't even understand how he knows 

you’ll just be laying in bed on your phone after a really rough day and wanting to cry and changbin will just come up and give you the warmest gentlest bear hug 

he won’t say anything but he’ll just hold you until you want to talk or just cry it out

lets be honest changbin hugs would be the best tho

like he hugs with his whole being

in a relationship i feel like he is super affectionate so hugs are pretty common but he probably hugs differently for different circumstances

like he gives really gentle hugs when your sad and strokes your hair, kissing the top of your head

probably a big fan of quick side hugs when you're in public or with the boys

big cuddly hugs when you’re alone where he can rock you side to side or flop onto the couch with you

so ‘i love you’

again changbin falls fast and hard so he would for sure be the first one to fall in love

but he wants you to say it first because he knows sometimes he can move too quickly and he doesn’t want to make you feel uncomfortable

the first time you say it changbin is just so happy 

before you can even finish the sentence he’s already saying it back

“I love you-”

“I love you more.”

he never forgets an anniversary even if he is on tour

during one of their breaks he flew you out so you could celebrate together 

he loves traveling with you

even if its just a road trip or the two of you randomly decide to spend the weekend at a hotel that's thirty minutes from your house

changbin definitely knows what he wants in life so the second he decides you are the one for him he starts planning how he wants to spend his life with you

he loves having serious conversations with you about the future

changbin loves when the two of you invite all the boys over for dinner and it turns into a fancy dinner party and he cant help but picture you doing this five or six years from now and you have kids and are throwing dinner parties like this on the weekends

you too throw a HUGE Christmas party every year

like inviting lots of staff from the company and a bunch of family and friends 

so like one second you are talking to changbin’s sister and your mom then the next thing you know you are accidently bumping shoulders with fuckin BamBam from Got7 or Tzuyu from Twice and Jae is singing with Jisung in your living room

its like a huge fancy event that you and changbin throw at your place that you spend like a month planning for

everyone is dressed very nice and your house is spotless and flawlessly decorated with a brightly lit tree that you and changbin spent four hours decorating

by 9pm everyone is drunk on egg nog and opening presents from secret Santa 

changbin also never lets a Christmas go by without kissing you under the mistletoe 

the boys stay the night mostly because no one is sober enough to drag Jisung out of your house. 

So Christmas morning is always spent with the boys 

changbin always puts you first 

he is really considerate and always considers how his decisions will affect you (unless he’s trying to pay for something)

all in all changbin would just be the best boyfriend

congrat reader you landed an angel

Masterlist

[henqtic]

here’s a piece of “baby food disasters”

here's a piece of “count them”

update on me (sort of) since i haven’t been on here as much !!

i know a lot of people have been going back to school so i just wanted to check in and make sure you were all right — i've been all around doing pretty good,, pretty sure i saw one of my crushes smile at the mention of MY name and i saw one other look at me like looooook at me when i was going to see my friend and he was in her classsssss — that sounds so incredibly small but you had to be there, okay 😩 ??

and and, the other one talked to me he said, "are you my partner?" I WASN'T BUT AHHHHHHH OMG NEVER STOP TALKING PLEASE

also reading soc and i don't know... it's almost better than s&b but i miss nikolai </3

look i know i have like a billion diff crushes but they either don’t know me or i don’t even know what they look like under a mask + they’re name so i’m good 😩😩

EXCEPT FOR ONE . we’ve had a lot of the same courses for these last few years and guess what babe ? — i saw the potential and when i tell you mans came through

look i don’t even care, short hair and all, he’s such a perfect boy in my eyes

like how can you be cute, incredibly intelligent, have a nice smile and voice, someone my mother/family would love because you’re already connected to the culture, smell good, mature, have a sense of humor, pronounce my name right on the first try (bare minimum ik guys but people be coming up with so many pronunciations for my actual name it doesn’t make sense but him, just the way he says it — ahhh it makes me wanna throw up butterflies i can’t explain it )

and he’s like the first person i’ve ever liked that hasn’t given me a bucket load of ick to puke out months later just thinking of the time period i did — just. i physically can not .

[ariadneamare]

a playlist for you 2.0 | levihan

word count: 1.2k 

warnings: angst, a lil fluff, a lil nsfw 

a/n: i didn’t think it would be this short but i hope u enjoy! also i’m not proud of how this one went but i tried 

Safe and Sound  // Capital Cities 

Three years passed, and Levi could still not believe where he stood. Right in front of the person he loved most. 

He never imagined these before because he gave up on the idea of finding someone who would love him, and if he told his younger self where he was right now, the Levi from the past would call it bullshit.

Hanji dragged him to a party for New Year’s eve, and although he no longer went to crowded parties after they got together he still went because she really wanted to. 

There she stood, singing her heart out to the music blasting through five speakers in the room. A red cup in hand, he reckoned it held vodka. Levi was not a fan of Hanji drinking too much because she goes crazy after 15 shots, but he let this one pass because it is an occasion and Hanji had a huge smile on her face. 

“Levi, come here!” She screamed and dragged him closer to her body. He could feel warmth everywhere and he will never admit it but it made his dick twitch with the way she breathed in his face. “Dance with me, love.” 

The love Hanji gave him could not compare to any drug out there, he felt so high on seeing her alone. Experiencing the love she gave made him feel so safe. Three years together changed him, for the better. With Hanji, Levi was his best version. 

“I know that we’ll be safe and sound,” he whispered into her ear. Brushing his lips along her jaw and planting a small kiss. 

“We’re safe and sound,” Hanji replied to him, kissing the top of his forehead. 

Nowhere. Levi could not be any happier anywhere else but here. 

Are You With Me // Nilu

“That’s because you aren’t listening to me! I have been trying to get my point across,” Hanji huffs and pushes her clothes inside a small duffel bag. “Everything I say enters one ear and then out the other. Levi, are you with me?” 

“If would also listen to me, we would not be shouting right now.” Levi turned his face to give her a serious look. 

“I am not shouting!! You are, I was talking to you in  a calm manner just seconds ago but you kept denying and so here I am now being accused of starting the fight.” 

A sigh came out of his lips, “I never accused you of starting the fight. I simply said that we would not be shouting at each other right now if you listened to me!” 

“Are you in or are you out?” Hanji tried hiding her tears, a cough escapes her mouth to cover the pain she felt. 

“I have always been in, when did I ever show you that I never wanted this?”

“Then tell me the truth.”

The raven-haired man sat on the other end of the bed, staring at the floor and trying to process everything that was happening. Just weeks ago they were doing really good, he even felt happy. It was just a dream, after all, a beautiful one at that. After the party, things came crashing down. 

It was a single glitch in the system. A fucking stranger to him already, but it happened and now there was no way he could go back to change anything. 

“I told you, didn’t I?” He breathed, clenching his fists and closing his eyes. “It was nothing, why won’t you believe me?” 

Hanji closed the bag before replying, “sucking each other’s faces? That’s what you call nothing? I’m guessing every make-out session we had before going to bed was nothing to you, too. Forget about everything.” 

“Can you not go, please? Can you not leave me?” 

“I can’t afford another heartbreak, Levi. I just can’t anymore.” 

Thinkin bout you // Frank Ocean

Hanji held the phone by her chest, she sighed and stared up at the ceiling. Instagram was the best at reminding her of the things she lost. The screen on her phone lit, her wallpaper a picture of them during New Year’s. 

Levi stood in the middle of the room, a small smile on his lips as Hanji hugs him from the back. She remembers whispering promises to him, and she could recall the way he smirked at her. 

Nifa: Hanji, someone is down in the lobby waiting for you. 

Nifa: He says he isn’t leaving until you come down. 

Nifa: If you don’t want to see him I can call Mikasa to get his ass out of here. 

Hanji slid her phone under the pillow, turning away to rethink everything. 

She loved Levi to death, that man made her the happiest. So much so that she started feeling comfortable in the skin she wore. Levi was her person. 

The device hidden beneath the pillow began to chime again and she took it to check the new messages. 

Sasha: Bestie, I was about to visit and bring you food right? You will not believe who I saw. 

Sasha: It was your man! He looked like he didn’t sleep, I mean I know he really doesn’t but this time it looked worse. 

Sasha: Omg! I am not making you feel bad okay, I was just trying to describe him nicely because he paid for my order. 

Sasha: I’m coming up, open the door for me aight.

Sasha: ily 

Hanji opened Instagram, scrolling through her own feed and seeing all the posts she had of him. One she particularly loved was the candid shot of sleeping Levi, he looked so calm. She wished he had more of those. 

“I’ve been thinkin bout you,” she breathed. “What am I gonna do with you?” 

Mirrors // Justin Timberlake 

On the second week of their fight, Levi approached Hanji and asked if they could talk properly. And because she didn’t want to throw away their relationship without explanation, she agreed to meet him in their apartment. 

The original plan was to break up.

Hanji had her mind set, go back to their apartment just to talk then leave forever. But god was he so good. Levi was not only good at making her see reason, but he was also best at making her see stars. 

She stood from the bed, exhausted from their previous activity. Levi loved breaking her back. 

“Where do you think you’re going?” He asked her from behind, gripping her wrist tightly. “You aren’t leaving.” 

“You don’t decide that, Levi.” 

“I didn’t kiss her, I swear. She attacked me an-”

“You couldn’t fight back?” Hanji bit back, bitterness dripping from her tongue. 

“I did!! I pushed her away, it just so happened that you saw us the second she attacked me.” He pulled her in for a hug, “see how I am hugging you right now. I am begging you not to leave me. Cause I don’t wanna lose you now, I’m looking right at the other half of me.” 

“I fucking hate you,” the brunette’s voice broke. Tears streamed down her beautiful face and she made no effort to hide any of it.

“Go ahead, let it all out. Just don’t let go of me.” 

“I am sorry, Levi. I’m really sorry. I always assume th-”

“Sshhh, it’s okay. I got you.” Levi planted a kiss on her temple, “it’s you and me against the world, four eyes. Never let go of my hand.”

Of the billion songs out there, not one could express what these two felt for the other. Not a poem nor a story, but a touch from the other.

[zumpietoo]

Sorry,

I’ve been having to get up soooperrr early this week to be at work early, cuz leave early so I can phone interview/do focus groups, etc....so last nite I had other shit and then, at like 8PM, just crashed.....sooo.....over morning coffee:

https://thetaoofbetty.tumblr.com/post/654177242377748481#notes

First off, LOVE how even as she kinda admits it’s entirely her fanfic, she insists “Evan implied”, etc, endlessly.....and HER questionable relationship with the truth heads fully downhill from there.....

So turns out, no, Evan didn’t remotely say “this was the writers saying BH were friends”? Just your fanfic.....and then, “well, okay, yeah, THEY were awkward.....but I BELIEVE it was them friends anyway, riiiighttt?????” So, dude, just admit no, this wasn’t it. It was never “romantic” and y’all need to stop spinning this bullshit.

Actually, they didn’t “discuss” (and I’m really tired of this, as well...because “discussions” make for shitty TeeVee) dick. They investigated. And there’s no “miscommunication”. Betty cheated and is a slutty, murderous asshole, now. Jughead is a good person. Cause THAT was what I took from that episode----and considering what Jughead fully admitted the next ep, etc....if anything, ironically, this triggered for him that he really, REALLY needs closure and to face his demons, etc. which is what this has REALLY been setting up (and the not intended to be returned after ninety billion years centric ep).

Oh and if they HAD.....Jughead would have some idea that Betty’s now a psycho killer prostitute, which are the REAL issues (yes, I know, lots of all caps “REALS”) she needs to “discuss”.

Actually, again, Barfie Evan didn’t “imply” dick. In fact, in his rewording, he made a point of saying they’d be “sleuthing”.....and, again....this juvenile, “flirty friends” crap is supremely tiresome....while, obviously they’ll have conversations, he didn’t say this....

As is they “they’re gonna talk about everything!!!” Dude, that does NOT make for compelling TeeVee, and, again, Betty’s issues are waaayyyy bigger than this, whether y’all will admit it or not. And not, I don’t mean “PTSD”, I mean, she’s basically a horrible, out and out evvvolll person, currently.

Lastly, OMG!!! The fucking VM is immaterial AND no, it is not “definitely confirmed they’ll talk about it”.....when pressed by the Dippshits, Moron said, “you’ll definitely find out what was said”.....meaning it’ll be mentioned in passing or we’ll hear Jughead leaving the message in ep 11, right as he blacks out.

Plus, once again (and for the last fucking time):

Jughead left a meanie VM AFTER Betty had cheated/made his worst nightmare a reality, never bothered herself to even try and work it out, ditched him early and alone---while he had PTSD still and then didn’t bother to show a year later. The VM was at least 4 or 5 years after this.....AND Jughead even still, apologized.

In current time, Jughead apologized, has been nothing but civil to her (even tho he’s clearly still struggling with it and other issues), while Betty is utterly shitty to him, uses him when it benefits her, betrayed him further and is a psycho killer prostitute.

So, again, the VM is completely immaterial.....and, again, no matter what was said, an actual friend/decent human being would’ve wanted to help the other person if they did say something terrible....

And even Barfie Evan admitted, “more not what was said, but how it was said”.

Oh and, guess what, jackholes? Jughead, actually more than any other character here, IS permitted to be in a bad mood, too!

[softpine]

this is a ridiculously long one, i’m sorry! i broke it into sections so it’s easier to find your ask

[not related to the current simblr issue]

@tastelesscolors​ ahhhhhhhh i can’t even tell you how happy this made me, this is the sweetest thing 🥺 i’ve always wanted to make people see the world differently through my writing (because in writing this, i’ve also started to see the world differently) so that’s a HUGE compliment!! thank you so so much!! 💖💖💖

i don’t think i understand what this means jfksjd sorry that happened to you though :(

considering i had to rewrite some of my plot because it just wasn’t fitting right.... me too 😅 jskdjs but thank you!! i’m glad you’re interested 💖

fjskdjs me!

omg i wish i could help, but the only mullet i can think of off the top of my head is this one. otherwise i have no idea, that’s why i had to make asa’s myself :( i’m sorry!!

i would rather not share, somehow people twist it into something else even if just post the number and give zero input about it. i don’t pay attention to numbers anyway, it stresses me out :/

[about my horrific chemistry exam lmfao]

@orphyd​ i love u more nia 🥺🥺💖💖💖

thank you!! i think i would need more luck than the entire universe contains but 😅 i appreciate it 💖

thank you so much 🥺 i’m trying to stay positive and hope that the next test will be better, but honestly i’m already resigning myself to the fact that i’ll have to retake this one too. i wish i could blame it on the pandemic but this has been happening much longer than covid fjksjds but it’s okay!! i’ll finish it one way or another, i’m committed! thank you again for reaching out 💖💖

sjksjd i don’t cheat, but thank you! 💖💖 i just want to get on with my life and get a job and actually have something of my own for once... i feel like i’ve been in college for 20932092 billion years :(

thank you so much, i needed to hear this 🥺💖 i sent my professor an email right after the test, basically just explaining that i wasn’t trying to insult her with my horrible score lmao. i had her for chemistry 1 last year (the semester that i actually passed it lmaoo) so she already knows that i struggle with chemistry, but i just feel like not only did i let myself down, but i also let her down. it’s been especially hard not having classes in-person because a 20 minute zoom meeting just isn’t the same as a real lecture :( i don’t know what else she could possibly do for me, i just really..... REALLY suck at chemistry :( but i appreciate you reaching out, it feels good to just be reminded that i’m more than this one class 💗

[related to the current simblr issues]

trigger warning for: racism, antisemitism, bullying (of minors), etc.

here’s the briefest summary i can manage:

oliveandoak & simvicii used to be popular simblrs last year. they started a discord. that discord included many other popular simblrs. in that discord, they all participated in things like racism, antisemitism, bullying of minors, targeted hate, etc. [more proof]. none of these people came forward or reported the behavior that was happening in the discord. now that they’ve been called out, lots of them are posting apologies, but you have to wonder how sincere they could possibly be, given that some of them helped write oliveandoak’s apology and called it “damage control”... so that’s a super quick summary! i suggest reading all the screenshots if you want further proof

i’m genuinely very sorry that this topic is triggering for you, but i’ve already been tagging everything with the appropriate tags (racism tw, antisemitism tw, bullying tw, etc.) and i feel it would be disrespectful for me to tag it as anything else (like drama tw, because it’s not drama, it’s much more than that). i also miss my dash being full of creativity and love, but right now we’re seeing that pushing everything under the rug doesn’t help anyone. i would recommend taking a hiatus if this is negatively affecting your mental health, and i’m truly sorry that this situation is triggering

literally!! i can’t even describe how angry i was this morning when i woke up to see that list including multiple people who had dm’ed me yesterday (pretending that they were innocent & that they all stood up to oliveandoak when in reality they were actively participating in everything). their apologies mean absolutely nothing considering they couldn’t even own up to me privately. they’re just covering their asses and i feel so stupid for trusting them even for a moment

yeah i’ve never thought about leaving simblr until now tbh. i’m still not going to leave until my story is done, but this has made me realize that 1. people suck, 2. the internet makes it even easier for people to suck :( i’m so sorry that you don’t feel safe or welcome on simblr, i can’t even imagine how this must feel for anyone affected. just know that i love and support you and if there’s anything i can possibly do to make you feel more welcome, let me know 💖

literally me!! i’ve never used discord (except with irl friends) and i’m definitely not about to start now. can’t trust anyone!

@bb-enablefreebuild​ omg thank you, but it’s okay! it’s not about me. i just feel sad that people used me as a mouth piece and i trusted them when they said they were just being manipulated in that group. when really they were manipulating me haha. but now i know better 🤷🏻‍♀️ ily!! 💖

[sweetest-honeybee]

I’m writing a thing

Okay, so as a young teenager (Because I didn’t start actually using the internet until I was 12 or 13) I was imaginative. I would fantasize and think up new scenarios involving my favorite YouTubers. Wow, cringey, I know. But listen. 

There’s a story that’s been a reoccurring idea in my mind for nearly two or three years, maybe even four. It was this idea that some kind of alien race would come to Earth and just...abduct people. And among those people included my internet faves. (Omg, wow, so cool, so awesome, woohoo)

So we know where this is going, right? They get kidnapped, they get tortured or maybe they get recruited. Something happens, yes? Good. 

Now, over time this idea has evolved. I’ve been thinking about this idea knowing I wanted to write something or draw a comic for it but because of how those ideas were ‘cringey’ I never did anything with it except re-imagine it over and over in my head every single day until I go in a direction I liked. 

Now, here’s the point of this post. 

I’ve finally gotten to a point where I liked it and now I want to write it out. 

You: Cool, and?

AND I wondered if anyone was interested in reading it or being tagged if and when I post it? I wondered if you guys may like it! 

Here’s what goes down in the story: And it’s a LOT, and I mean a LOOOTTT of information bc a bunch of shit goes down

Aliens, called Galians, invade the Earth with a specific goal in mind, They want to capture and use influencers across the globe to their advantage to take over other planets across billions of galaxies. 

Knowing that internet influencers are among some to the largest groups of those people, they decide to pick a day when VidCon is happening (In 2020) and coincidentally for the sake of the plot, several known YouTubers have come to talk on stage and boom, a lot of them are already in one place making it easier for the Galians. 

So, they invade, take the YouTubers including Thomas Sanders, Markiplier, and Jacksepticeye (All three of which play a large role in the plot) and several others. They even take music artists, visual artists, directors, actors, whoever they can get their hands on long with nearly twenty (20) million other people just to experiment with. 

They have a mentality that they can somehow ‘extract’ the human ability to influence such a large audience and cause other planets to “Follow” and “Subscribe” to them and use that to take over those other planets. 

So, with that being said they have also done some research on these influencers, mostly the YouTubers, and come across how Thomas, Mark, and Sean use these ‘Egos’ or ‘Sides’ to reach a larger audience. Knowing this, they decide that oh hey, we can clone them and kinda influence them ourselves to meet the aspects of these personalities that they’ve been given. 

Buutttt, nobody except the Galians know that this is happening and they keep the clones in a much lower part of the ship away from everyone to avoid conflict. 

So, most of them are created. All of the sides are created, all of sean’s egos are created (yes, including anti. no, not including robbie), and only dark, wilford, the host, google, dr iplier, and bim are created of the iplier egos. 

But after they’re created, they immediately have hints of their personalities. It’s odd, but less work for the Galians. However, some are much more aggressive than others and they’re all just super confused as to what’s going on. They don’t have any memories, they don’t know their names, they don’t know who Thomas, Mark, and Sean are. They don’t know anything. They don’t even know how to read or write or talk. They’re essentially just children. 

Sadly, when the Galians realize that they don’t hardly know anything, they get angry and take it out on all of them. They stop caring for them, not keeping them healthy and stuff, barely do anything for them and after a while either lock them in there for weeks at a time or use them for....*ahem*.....other purposes. 

But at some point there’s a race called the Avians (Yes, winged people woohoo) and they don’t like the Galians. They know that the Galians have millions of people on their ship that they’re holding captive and they wanna help everyone on the ship. They do, and they evacuate everyone on it and either kill or lock up several of the Galian people on the ship. 

They put everyone somewhere safer (it will be said that they’re going to be put in several camps, but it’s not a bad one, don’t worry) and then with further investigation see that there’s three people on the ship who have had different circumstances than everyone else for some odd reason. Three men named Thomas, Mark, and Sean. SO, they take them to this huge lab and really, they’re all terrified because it’s yet another alien race and they’re being taken to a lab again and probably gonna be put through the same thing again. 

That’s not the case! 

They keep them there, give them food, water, some clothes, and a space to sleep like everyone else of the 20 million-well at least who was still alive among the now 14 million people that they found. Still, they did some questioning, and had intent to learn some more about them. 

So they stayed there for a while but sadly were just not into anything because i mean they had none of their friends, family, or significant others and no pets or anything. 

Knowing this, and how it affected everyone else who was abducted, the Avians decided they try to contact Earth and ask for everyone to come to their planet (including that everyone who was abducted was either killed by Galians or survived long enough to be put into safe camps) and at first they can’t reach anyone. The second time, they reach some radio people listening for stuff in outer space ya know? And so they deliver their message (Yes, it’s translated, I’ve decided that they have like billions of languages stored into a translator device that they use while they speak) and when it’s delivered, they get a message back saying that they wanna send a select few people to come first. If all goes good, they’ll send some families. If all goes well afterwards, they’ll send all of the families and friends. If that goes well, well, they might even just send the whole planet population since Earth looks like shit anyway bc capitalism. 

That being said, do the Sides and Egos ever escape as well? Do they meet their Hosts? We’ll see! 

So if that sounds interesting and you wanna be tagged or smtn then pls tell me! With what I have in mind, I feel like this will be quite an interesting story :3 

[khiphop-discussions]

about aomg: personality / your opinion about them thanks!

Loco: Just chill (until he gets drunk). He minds his own business and stays out of trouble. He doesn’t really have any negative traits but he seems like he’s really bad at talking to women he likes (lol watch some clips of him and Hwasa speaking. I think it was on “I Live Alone” or something? It was really awkward). He’s been around A LONG time and still hasn’t caused any drama. He won season 1 of SMTM so that’s a long time to keep your head out of trouble (at least for a rapper). Not the biggest fan of his music but I REALLY like the stuff he does with Gray. Him and Gray are literally a dream team. CoRay is what Jay/Sik-K could be if they made a unit lol.

Gray: REALLY handsome obviously so let’s just get that out of the way now. He’s really talented as well. He can do all types of styles of music. He’s actually more of a geek than he lets on tbh. Everybody thinks he’s dreamy but he’s always telling cheesy jokes and his friends seem to have at least a handful of stories of him doing embarrassing things lol. I feel like he tries to put on a cool image but that’s not actually really him if you were to meet him in real life. Another thing about him is he seems really generous, he produces for many rappers who are WAY less famous than him and almost definitely won’t make him enough money to truly be “worth it”. But he still does it anyway cause he’s really passionate about music, seems to be happy for other musicians to succeed, and is just a really cool down to Earth dude despite his good looks and success. Over all I really like Gray as a person based on what I’ve seen. As a producer, he’s definitely top-tier. Jay Park: He’s really generous as well. I can definitely see why him and Gray ended up working together so closely. Jay is one of those people who can be one extreme or the other but at the same exact time so it’s kind off weird (me and Jay actually have this trait in common and that’s why it’s so obvious to me). Like he can be really grounded and down to Earth but then also be way too high on himself at the same time. It’s really weird lol. Honestly, I think Jay is a good dude underneath it all but sometimes everything going on around him can put him in weird positions and cause him to act in a way that he probably isn’t proud of after the dust settles. I think it would do him good to actually listen to some of the criticisms he gets (obviously not all cause people on the internet talk a lot of shit but some of it is actually correct). Confidence is good but sometimes it’s okay to listen when people are telling you that something about your music or personality is off. I like his R&B stuff more than his rap stuff (which I’ve said like a billion and one times already lol).

Simon D: He’s REALLY freaking funny! He’s calmed down a lot over the years. I think it’s partially because of that point in time where he was dealing with depression and stuff. That usually humbles you quite a bit and causes you to mellow out somewhat after you come out of it. That said, I actually can’t get much of an opinion abouthis personality tbh. I don’t know if it’s because of lack of exposure or if it’s because a lot of his humor is him actually trying to avoid showing the more serious and/or different sides of his personality. I’m also not a huge fan of his music but he’s definitely a good rapper. His voice is really nice.

DJ Pumpkin: I actually don’t know much about him but from the little I’ve seen of him, he seems funny too. He’s co-ceo after Simon stepped down.  Ugly Duck: He’s a good rapper. I know he DJs as well but unfortunately I never actually got to see him DJ (he was actually DJing at the club like 100 feet down the street from the one I was at. Me and my friend were standing on the same street waiting for the light to change so we could cross and we were standing behind him until he entered the club lol. We didn’t say anything cause he had earphones in. So we just left him alone lol. I made a whole post about this night and all the things that happened if you’re interested. It was pretty eventful lol).

Hep: I know almost nothing about him. Is he the one who had a baby or was that DJ pumpkin? Maybe it was DJ Wegun?!?!?! IDK lol DJ Wegun: Don’t know much about him.  Chloe Devita: I literally know nothing about her except that she just signed.

ELO: GREAT music. I love the 8 Femmes EP, Other than that, I don’t even know how he looks. I can’t recall ever seeing his face. I definitely don’t know his personality either. Sogumm: I think this means “salt” in Korean. Interesting name. I like the song she did with BigOne called “Sunshine”. Hoody: Really nice voice. I think she’s one of the best R&B singers in Korea. “Adios” is one of my personal favorite Korean songs right now. She’s pretty. From what I’ve seen, her personality is really reserved and quiet.

Punchnello: AMAZING rapper. It’s weird though because I don’t feel like I’ve ever seen much of his personality even though he’s been on SMTM two times already and won one season. He seems REALLY focused though. I know he likes cats a lot.  Junior Chef: Literally one of the BEST DJs in Korea. He’s definitely my favorite so far. I’ve seen a lot of great DJs when in Korea but one thing I noticed is that a lot of them don’t have great song choices and can’t read the crowd all that well. A lot of them seems like they choose song that they like that aren’t actually that popular or able to be danced to easily. However, they can definitely work the boards and mix songs well. Junior Chef was literally the TOTAL package though. He knows what songs will get the crowd excited, he knows what order to play them in for best effect, and he can dj well. There would be times where I was literally just thinking “OMG get this DJ off the stage and bring Junior Chef up already. We know he’s here!” I’d always be a little bummed out when Junior Chef set was over. He’s one of the few members of AOMG I’ve  been in the same room with for an extended amount of time and yet I know literally NOTHING about his personality compared to others. LOL that’s kinda funny and ironic af.

Code Kunst: Honestly, I can really name any songs of his that I’m a fan of. He seems pretty funny though. And I like his cats. Lee Hi: I’ve never listened to her music to be honest. I still maintain that her and One would make a really cute couple. Woo Wonjae: GREAT rapper. He can be funny sometimes. Overall, his personality is quiet and reserved. Don’t really listen to his music but I’ve seen enough of him on SMTM to know kinda his personality + that he’s really good at rapping.

Cha Cha Malone: I think he’s more associated wiht H1gher now (maybe his AOMG contract expired or something and so he just fully switched to H1gher? IDK how that worked out) but I still somewhat associate him with being an AOMG artist. I think he’s SUPER talented with music. He’s more versatile than I originally thought. As a person, he’s alright. Don’t think he’s a terrible guy or anything. He can probably be cool if you met him in person and got to know him. He also seems like he can be down to Earth. He has a lot of playboy/fuckboy ways though. (That can likely be said about anyone on this list tbh. So I can’t really make it too big of a deal for him. I know for sure it can be said about Simon D a few years back). He also seems like he can be kind of hot headed but I can understand considering how much shit people have given him since he’s been in Korea + the nature of the music/entertainment industry. I’d probably be going off on people too lol

[jewpacabruhs]

Love how having different Cartman’s headcanons means you automatically see him as a bigot or something negative. There’s billions of headcanons people give him. Yet, you can’t seem to process that everyone is different and won’t like the same thing you like.

luv wakin up to ppl deciding my words mean one thing when they dont. one thing about me is i never say one thing and mean another. i say exactly what i want to be heard, and it's not up for interpretation, even tho yall always twist my words (and im talking strictly about me in all this, not any of my friends, jus me). if i say it, take it at face value. and all ive ever said is that certain versions of kyman/cartman are antisemitic in nature. can they be redeemed? absolutely. kyman as a whole ship has been redeemed imo.

ive said tall!cartman and short!kyle makes me wary because it imposes a physical power imbalance where there's already a psychological and verbal one - but if someone makes it clear that their tall!cartman isn't abusive, then it's just fine! but ive noticed that there's a natural inclination to make the tall person in a ship the overbearing one, and that in general makes me uncomfortable, but especially when done in kyman - it's icky to me. but if tall!cartman is a decent human lol (and ur definition of decent might be different than mine), again, lovely! it's just the pairing of physical dominance with mental dominance. iv grown wary over the years of certain... red flags that seem to be present in legitimately antisemitic "interpretations" of kyman.

now, what one considers antisemitic is debatable, though i've never encountered a jewish "mountain" kyman & therefore as a jew talking to goyim, i think my opinion on it should be valued. and i'm not saying im the authority on all things jewish, but im friends with... four jews in this fandom now and we all have the same opinion on kyman. i think that's notable. i'm jus the loudmouth one. and additionally i don't think it's a ridiculous opinion that should be adhered to under like. a dictatorial iron fist. like people seem to think, if im not lai's lackey, i'm a neurotic jew-bitch that wants to police the fandom, but i consider myself a pretty realistic and self-aware person, and i like to think i don't get clouded by righteous self-conviction. so if i got ridiculous, i'd admit it. but i can honestly say i really dont think i have.

all ive ever said, and u can fact-check this claim because i never delete posts, is that some versions of kyman are or border on being antisemitic, and it makes me sad. ive gotten a little aggressive at times, when faced with death threats and intimidation swastikas, but always in public and always bluntly. lemme reaffirm that: i never send anons. i rarely dm ppl. and everything i've said privately to people i've argued with over the last year, i'd be comfortable posting, because i don't think i've ever said or done anything wrong - and you might roll ur eyes at that, but like i said, i pride myself on being levelheaded and nondelusional about my own actions. if i went crazy with power lmao, i'd admit it & go "damn wtf". in any other debate, i'd step into the other side's shoes, but in this case i cant, because everyone who's argued with me seems to really wanna hold onto their antisemitism, and i can't sympathize with that.

anyway. it's not an issue of liking the same thing i like. for me, it's only ever been about antisemitism. for lai, i don't wanna speak for her but kyle means the world to her and she dislikes when people do him dirty - for me, frankly, i don't really give two shits about kyle, but him being jewish means im automatically protective of him, especially because he has been done horribly dirty in the past. people can do whatever they want, but if someone tells someone their portrayal is a little iffy (and that's all i've ever done. i never send anons, i never send my friends after people. i say that with full honesty.), they shouldn't take that as bullying or cruelty; they should go "omg im sorry i didnt know! do u hav suggestions on how i can do better? i love kyle and kyman so i wanna do him/it justice." but if they laugh and embrace the accusation & proudly deem themselves a "bad kyman" or a nazi lmao, i think it's safe to assume there's some legitimate antisemitism under there.

and if they don't try to do kyman in a less offensive way, if they spitefully and intentionally make cartman creepier and more bigoted, make kyle girlier and more pathetic, have cartman call kyle "jew" ten times more than they already did - it's sus. it makes me wonder why you even ship them at all. because kyman should never be about antisemitism. that's not a big part of it. the original appeal was a rival ship, and now it's about their extreme dependence on each other. if people think demeaning kyle and his religion is a necessary part of kyman... 😬😬😬

[thesinglesjukebox]

THE 1975 - PEOPLE

[5.56]

The 1975 you know is gone! THEY'RE HARDCORE NOW!!!

Alex Clifton: As far as the lyrics & delivery go: a truly punk song, a well-needed wakeup call, and Healey's screaming is how I have felt literally every day for the last four years, which I deeply appreciate. As an actual single: I can listen to this maybe once a month because it's super dissonant and honestly does not help with my constant anxiety that the world will end shortly. [5]

Kylo Nocom: Rightfully devastated punk that would probably sound a lot better if it didn't just seem like yet another damned attempt by the 1975 at appeasing the indie crowd through art-y posturing. Really, throw shit at their debut all you want, they knew exactly what they wanted to do and did all of it with near-perfect pop sheen. Their obsession with their own legacy has led to their musical downfall, and now we have to listen to them condescend and uphold it as somehow significant, as if there aren't artists with significantly more to say than Matty Healy that don't have the resources to have their voices heard. Eclecticism does not equal talent; Healy's inanities will not save us. [3]

Alfred Soto: "Syndrums? What syndrums?" Blustering through a rawk number showing little sweat, The 1975 write a Marilyn Manson take on "Love It If We Made It." It likely portends nothing except increased facility. [5]

Ryo Miyauchi: "People" as just the music is something I can't resist. Matty strutting to the beat of loud ass rock riffs with the tones bleeding from the seams? The guy singing like a snot-nosed know-it-all jerk in love with the spotlight, audibly kissing the camera? He may not be good at screaming as much as he think he does, but him simply giving himself to the moment sounds good enough. But if he also hopes to say something, and for me to feel like he actually did, well, this isn't exactly it. I've long understood that Matty lives in the same fucked-up world as me -- that's what "Love It If We Made It" made sure to do after all -- but I'm honestly exhausted from songs that's reportage and not much else. I can see the world burn down from my own eyes too! If Matty, or whoever else in pop, wants to say something, I need them to expand upon that blank between "republic's a banana, ignore if you wanna" and "fuck it, I'm just gonna get food, girls, gear." Ignoring is easy, I know, but that self-care via self-indulgence can't do much to help anymore. What exists beyond it when it's no longer the go-to step? Matty doesn't have the answer for that here. [6]

Maxwell Cavaseno: The only man who apparently decided that The (International) Noise Conspiracy was just what the world needed, long after even the actual T(I)NC was dissolved, would naturally be Matty Healy. Plenty of 'people' have misattributed this song to sounding like Marilyn Manson's "Beautiful People" which is an association I just simply don't hear at all. Instead I get a lot more of Manic Street Preachers, The Hives, The Blood Brothers, T(I)NC and even their frontman's prior band Refused's last moments. When the soon to be released 1975 album was discussed even in the build for last year's listless and dissatisfying A Brief Inquiry... constant invocations of the band's past as a journeyman post-hardcore act that probably would've died a death in the lower-tier nostalgia bin alongside earthtone9, Devil Sold His Soul, SikTH, Rinoa or The Ocean Fracture. The fodder of so many long gone myspace pages and collections of patches. Now it feels that era is being discussed with a genuine affectionate nostalgia again; and if there's anything this band loves to key in on, it's genre nostalgia. Do they land it? Maybeish. Straight Ahead Rock has admittedly felt less capable in The 1975's hands unless filtered into Glastonbury Festival Anthems a la "Robbers", so hearing them try to defiantly thrash while remaining groovy is either endearing or slight. Still, I admittedly can't think of a 1975 album yet where the key single was the leading one, so for now it feels just like a proposition of yet another shape-shifting going down. [6]

Oliver Maier: Post-hardcore with traces of 13-era Blur could have been the key to finally converting me to the church of the 1975, but this still isn't doing it for me. I don't doubt that Matty Healy is concerned about *vague hand gesture* the state of things, but for a band so aware that sincerity is indeed scary, I always feel as though their ventures into new sonic territory are the product of a desire to impress rather than earnestly communicate, that they might dip their toes into afrobeats or flirt with trap drums only because people don't expect them to. Which isn't a crime! But the punk signifiers here feel like just that: signifiers, gesturing at a genre that's all about urgency in an attempt to reverse-engineer that same quality, but capturing none of its essential recklessness. I prefer the unhinged vocal here to Healy's usual crooning, but paired with lyrics that modulate between the generic, the outright dreadful and the word "fuck" a whole bunch, it's just not enough to dispel the impression of a calculated facsimile of protest music. I could see myself softening on this if the rest of Notes on a Conditional Form sticks to the same sound, which might suggest some real commitment rather than the sense that the 1975 are still just trying on new masks and expecting an A for effort. But I'm not holding my breath. [4]

Rachel Bowles: I was lucky enough to hear this song for the first time live and witness the crowd erupt with infectious anger and joy- somehow knowing every single word of this days old song. There was something truly palpable, political and vital there, Healy has told the press he's never felt more like he's in a punk band and experiencing 'People' live, it's not hard to hear why. At the time I described it as "a Marilyn Manson meets Glassjaw-esque punk screed with enough F-bombs to satisfy even the most discerning teenage contrarian... an anthem that screams with the rage of billions of millennial and Gen Z 99 percenters, powerlessly watching the world burn (literally) as Donald Trump and Boris Johnson pat themselves on the back."Had I not clearly seen Healy & co in front of me, I would never have pegged 'People' as a 1975 song- this new venture into raw punk, however impressive, is just another string in the bow of band that is constantly reinventing themselves. [8]

Joshua Copperman: Let's unpack the worst line in "People"! Part 1: "My generation wanna fuck Barack Obama": A decade ago this might have been a reference to "Crush on Obama," but now any given Gen Z socialist will tell you that Obama wasn't progressive enough, that he was a neoliberal centrist, etc etc. So it's more like fuck Barack Obama. Double meanings! Part 2: "living in a sauna": Could be a climate change reference, but with the next line it's more likely to be a hotbox joke. More double meanings! Except the idea that Earth is itself a hotbox is both funnier and more evocative. Part 3: "Legal marijuana": Both a long-delayed Halsey comeback for that one line in "Colors" and a catalyst for even more double meanings! there's the aforementioned hotbox joke, or it's the ever-ubiquitous "using drugs to numb the pain" thing. Conclusion: This line both says a lot of things and says absolutely nothing, which is what anyone who hates this song will think it does. Oh right, there's a song attached. And it's fantastic. The mix of a gritty aesthetic with bright, clean guitar tones. The ability to make a tuneless song sound as catchy as "Chocolate" but inexplicably less anoying. This is everything I've wanted the 1975 to do, or anyone to do when everything in all genres sounds so listless and geared towards Playlists. Even Idles pandered with the whole 'ten points to Griffyndor' thing. The 1975 is virtually only pandering to emo kids with this one. And edgelords, hopefully putting them on a path to salvation instead of hatred. Or not. Whoever it's for, I'm glad it exists. [9]

Edward Okulicz: Honestly, I know that throwing reductionist comments at male pop stars stepping outside their apparent lane isn't a curative against how such things have been levelled at women over the years, but my initial, and second, and third, and fourth reaction to this song is "omg Matty Healy just shut up and be a pop star, you know, something you're really good at." I'll be over here in sensitivity training if you need me. [4]

[Read, comment and vote on The Singles Jukebox]

[purplesurveys]

497

Have you ever cut your own hair? Nope, my mom would never allow me; and tbh I never would allow myself to do it either. What do you eat most frequently? Rice. I have it for every meal, 7 days a week. Except for when I have pasta. Are you a fan of video games? I’m a fan of watching people play them, and there are a lot of video games I have sentimental attachment to because I was raised in a home where all the boys knew how to work a console; but I myself don’t play. What's your favorite color combination? Black/white with anything earthy. I’m all for simple tones. Did you share a locker at school? No, we all had our own.

What's one sport you could never play? Basketball. I never could understand what the rules were. When we had basketball for PE in high school, I would literally just stand on the court when it came time to play because I never had a grasp on the game. I was a sucky teammate fosho. Blue or black ink? Black. I hate using pens with blue ink. Have you ever sang karaoke? I think the last time was when I was 12 or 13. I hate hate hate being the center of attention and the last thing I want is to sing (which I don’t do) on a microphone that’s gonna amplify my voice and will force people to look at me. What was the last concert you attended? Man it was nearly a year ago, but it was Paramore. Have you held anyone's hand in the past week? Yup, you just barely caught the timeframe! I last held hands last Thursday, exactly a week from today. What's your favorite perfume/body spray/cologne? I bought Beyoncé’s Heat Rush a few years back because I was a huge fan (still am), but I didn’t know I was gonna end up loving the scent so much. It’s still my perfume today and it’s my go-to when I’m going on a date or going somewhere fancy and/or formal. How long does it take you to get ready in the morning? 45 minutes should be generous enough. I have to beat the traffic everyday so I don’t devote a lot of time simply to get ready. What is the oldest age you think should wear makeup? No age is too old for makeup. How old were you when you went on your first date? I’ve never had a first date per se...I did have one special museum + early dinner ‘date’ with Gab that ended up becoming memorable. I was 16 then. What's your nationality(ies)? Filipino. Pretty sure there’s some distant, distant Spanish blood somewhere down the line. Are you an open book? Very open.  Do you think you're a good secret keeper? For the most part, yeah; but there’ll be times that I wouldn’t be able to help it and spill to Gabie. Which is fine, because she forgets things easily and is 101% not up to date with and doesn’t care for anyone’s lives. She’s super unbothered which is why I kinda choose to tell her stories; but if she had a big mouth, then I probably won’t spill secrets to her. Name one fashion trend you could never follow. Oversized shirts. Do you prefer long hair or short hair? Right now, I’m preferring short. When do you plan to go to sleep tonight? Just my bed. Has anyone besides your family seen you naked? Yes. If so, who? My girlfriend. What exotic animal would you love to have as a pet? NOPE. Do you want kids when you're older? Yeah, I do. Did your parents sign you up for anything you hated as a child? They made me sing to 100+ guests on my 7th birthday party if that counts. I had ballet when I was 5, but it wasn’t that I hated it...it’s just that I was too young to understand what was happening and what I was signed up to, which was partly why I did so badly in the class. Where's your cell phone? I lost my first cellphone on a 1st grade field trip, so it’s definitely somewhere in the waterfalls we went to 14 years ago. Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Egg. What are your feelings about Octomom? I don’t really know the circumstances surrounding her, so. Do you know of Smosh? Of course, I grew up watching them. I was there when their popularity exploded, and a little longer after that. I don’t anymore, but sometimes I’ll go back and watch their 2011-2013 skits, and my personal favorite series of theirs, Lunchtime with Smosh.  Do you drink enough water daily? Yep. I looooooove water; I probably drink too much of it haha. Is your diet healthy? I think it *could* fall under healthy? I eat too much junk for my life but I always balance it out with veggies and I just basically make sure that everything else I eat can be beneficial for me, so it balances all the junk out. What's your favorite fruit? Yeah no I hate fruit. What was your favorite Halloween costume? The year when I dressed up as AJ, because I got noticed by her for it. Also the time I dressed up as Sofie, because that was lowkey hilarious. Have you purchased any cool objects from a foreign country? No because everything in other countries (at least the ones I’ve been to) is SO EXPENSIVE. I prefer taking photos, they serve as the best souvenirs for me. Are you on a laptop or a desktop computer right now? Laptop. Where do you plan to post this survey? On my Tumblr, which you’re on right now if you’ve reached this point of the survey. Do you remember anyone's number by heart? Just my mom’s, sister’s, and Gabie’s. Are you a morning person or a late night owl? Night owl, definitely. Name something you will never try in your lifetime. Fruits that I haven’t already tried. What do you think is your biggest flaw? I chicken out of certain things because I’m afraid of failing. First physical trait you notice in the sex you're attracted to? Body language. That technically counts right? Hahaha. How about personality wise? How they speak to me. Are you sick often? I’m sick never. Would you rather have strep throat or an ear infection? I’ve had neither and would like it to stay that way thank you??? When did you last shower? A couple of hours ago, because it was weirdly and annoyingly hot today. Do you have neat handwriting? Yes, I get a lot of compliments for my penmanship. Are you a messy or organized person? Depends on what the space is. My bag for school can get very messy, but my files are always organized; and my room is what I’d call messy-organized in that it’s a mess but I remember where every single thing is. At what age do you hope to get married? 27-28. Is being thin really all that great? I don’t hate being it, that’s for sure. Which of the seven deadly sins do you think you're most guilty of? Envy. How much time have you spent on the computer today? Pretty much the whole day. My body wanted to watch a whole season of Queer Eye today haha.

What size shoe are you? 6-7. How was the weather today? Ugh, MAKE IT RAIN ALREADY. Do you live above, below, or on the Equator? Above the equator, but it’s very very close to it. Do you know how to use Photoshop? Nope. Admit it, you're thinking about someone right now. I’m thinking about the next meal I’m gonna be having lmfao. Where is he/she? It’s in the dining area. Where was your first job? I haven’t had one yet. Favorite year in high school? 3rd or 4th. East or West? East? Where did your first kiss take place? On my bed. What color do you wear most often? I can’t tell which but it’s definitely black or white.

Who was the last person you talked on the phone to? Gab. Have you ever been to a night club? Nah, I don’t know if clubs are my thing. I’m much more comfortable in bars. Are you allergic to anything? I’m not. What's the best place you have ever eaten? The buffet at Circles, Sambokojin, or the food I had at my cruise ship vacation. I really can’t pick. Do you own a hair straightener? I don’t have one of my own, but my mom will let me borrow hers if I need it. Are you barefoot right now? Correcto. Are you subscribed to any magazine? Nope. Puppies or kittens? Puppies. If you had a billion dollars, where would your first investment be made? A modern, spacious house. Who is the best artist you've seen live? PARAMORE YOOOOOOOOOOOO. They connect with their fans so well and you can easily tell you love what they do. Coldplay is a very close second as their production value is fucking insane. Any major plans coming up this week? No not really. I have a date with Gab tomorrow and we’re gonna go out and watch Midsommar, but that’s it for this week. She, Angela, and I are taking a road trip to Nasugbu next Monday though so that’s pretty major. Did you know they never told you Arnold's last name in Hey, Arnold? I never really thought about it. Would you rather watch a romantic comedy or watch a thrilling horror movie? OMG, my two favorite genres :( I’m watching a horror flick tomorrow so I can go for a romcom right now.   Why is Paris Hilton famous? Because of her great-grandfather and her Iconic show with Nicole Richie hahaha. How is your hair styled right now? It’s just down and dried out right now.

Favorite person that you've talked to today? Angela. Do you need AC right now? AC is always a good idea in the Philippines. Do more people call you by a nickname or your first name? My first name is already my nickname/given name. Name something you're proud of. Still being here. How do you feel about couples who say 'I love you' too soon? No judgment. If that’s how they communicate and if it works, so be it. What's the most recent favor you've done for somebody? I drove Laurice to UPTC last Tuesday so she can catch her bus going back all the way to Alabang. Are you at home right now? Yesssssssss I’m so happy to just be at home this whole week. What did you last spend money on? My parking fee at UPTC. Does any accent annoy you? No. How about turn you on? I like certain English accents but not to the point where they turn me on haha. Are you wearing any jewelry? Not right now. Do you get along better with your mom or your dad? Dad. Are you craving anything right now? BURGERS What's worse: Crocs or Uggs? Crocs. Do you knock before you open doors? Yeah, as much as I can. Do you know what a sock on the doorknob means? I think Penny from Big Bang Theory was the one who explained that this means that there are people having sex in the room, but then again it was a tie on the doorkob in that episode so I dunno if they still mean two different things. Chocolate or vanilla? Chocolate. What's your zodiac sign? Taurus. Does Fred from Youtube annoy you? No, not really.

[lokilickedme]

Okay so I promised a bunch of pics from ScotFest 2018, and I’ve been stuck posting from my phone for the last two days so - sorry for the delay, but here we go with the good stuff.  It’s long, but stay with me, you’re gonna enjoy this mad trip.

First, let me say this.

FUUUUUCCCCCCCKK.  I knew I was gonna be having McClary flashbacks the whole time but it started out ridiculous and just got worse as the day went on.

The moment we pulled up the first thing that stepped into view was a dude in an anarchy tee shirt with a kilt and Docs and long black hair strutting down the sidewalk.  If Chem!Tom was Scottish...oh wait a sec, didn’t he say at some point that he was a bit, on his mother’s side?  Works for me.  So anyway, we arrive at ScotFest and walk the long way to the shuttle bus pick-up with a bunch of kilted guys and an elderly couple dressed in ancient clan clothing (they looked awesome).  And before we even get off the bus at the festival grounds, we’re blasted with bagpipe music as a full regalia marching pipe band parades past the entrance.  Something smells REALLY.GOOD. and off to the left of the entrance is a field where two Mol-pups are chasing sheep around while their shepherd whistles commands loud enough to split your head open.  Yep, McClary flashbacks, right off the bat.  And big Scottish athletes are throwing things that don’t look like they were meant to be thrown, though the biggest and most impressive athletes on the field are the females who are using pitchforks to hurl big bags of sand backwards over their shoulders over a bar that’s about 20 feet above their heads.  Big is looking at me like “What the hell, mom??” so I tell him the ancient Scots were farmers and they made games and competitions out of their farm chores.  He’s like “No, I mean why are you breathing so hard?”

No comment.  Did I mention that the females were really impressive?  Good start to the day.

So we move on past the games into the main festival area and everywhere are man-knees.  I’ve never really paid much attention to man-knees before, but to be honest they’re kinda...hot.  I don’t even know why.  And there were so many of them...hundreds and hundreds of man-knees on open display, it’s almost like I shouldn’t be looking but they’re RIGHT THERE all over the damn place and I feel like a pervert scamming peeks.  And calves.  Man calves.  Not normally a fan, but there were some good ones on display.

The first thing we did was hit the tribal music tent and it was over for me before it even got good and started...because on the stage inside the tribal music tent was THIS Scottish god:

Don’t worry, the picture quality will get better.  So we settle in to enjoy the music and this guy is eating up the stage and spanking the shit out of that drum, and then he starts blowing on a flippin’ didgeridoo (yeah, a nine foot long Australian horn, don’t ask me why but omg that man’s lung power was making the ground rumble under our feet and all I could think was how that skill might carry over, if you know what I mean).

Suddenly I’m really interested in nine foot horns.

A really cool thing about hitting the afternoon shows was the fact that you could go right up to the side of the stage and nobody cared.  So I did.

Physically painful, let me tell ya.  I could just almost look up his skirt.

That horn is vibrating the ground where I’m standing and I’m actually relieved when he switches back to the drum because all that vibration has shifted my panties about two inches to the left and it’s getting uncomfortable.  The drum isn’t much better though, and neither is the view from where I’m standing - he’s a big stout bull and I’m three feet away from him while he beats that drum to a whimpering death.  I could reach out and tickle his bare knee if I felt like getting divorced.

So I go back and sit with my guys again and he starts doing this:

KNEES.  I mentioned man-knees before, didn’t I?  Well here, have a pair.  I’ll post a video later of what he did to this poor little drum, and to his own thick neck - because I can’t even describe it, and you know words are my thing.  He played his freaking adam’s apple or something, I don’t even know.

There were actually two other musicians on the stage with him, but I sort of forgot they were there.

There were also lots of adorable father/son kilted combos present - and yep, a bagpiper rounds out the onstage trio.  But again...man knees.  The ones on the left specifically.

So the show ends after a lot of insane drumming, war cries, didgeridoo blowing, bagpiping, and a really nasty little ditty about a girl who’s been touched so much she’s smooth as a stairway bannister (followed by an anthem to an unhealthy relationship that proclaimed “I’d rather be drunk a thousand years than be sober one minute with you”).  Nice, guys.

As soon as their set is over we leave the tent to go wander around, but most everyone else stays because it is as hot as the freaking surface of the sun on this day and the tent is like an oasis on Mars - which means when the band comes out to let the next band hit the stage, we’re pretty much alone outside with the bull and his two stagemates (sorry backup drummer and bagpiper, you guys were awesome and I loved you but didgeridoo guy vibrated my panties two inches to the left, you know how it is).

Anyway, we’re outside at the merch tent and Husband is buying something and I look up and nearly slam bodily into this:

Drummer/didgeridoo guy.  I vaguely recall yelling to Husband during the deafening noise of the show that he looked like Aquaman, and when I end up face to face with him it’s confirmed.  I think it’s the cranky eyebrow.

I also get to ogle the piper’s bagpipes up close and personal, which was hard to do as didgeridoo guy - whose name is CJ - is standing right behind me while I ooh and ahh over this weird thing, and he’s laughing at me for reasons unknown:

Maybe it was the stupid comment I made about squeezing the bag?

And then the three of them pose for a pic:

Goobers.  At this point Little walks up to them and they all sort of huddle around him and start laughing (Little has light-blindness and has to wear special shades outside so he was half blind and I think he rammed right into the guy with the hat), so I hand my phone to Husband and go to get him.  When I get close, didgeridoo guy puts an arm the size of a tree trunk around me and hugs me up next to him while the other two are tickling Little.  Husband starts snapping pics with my phone, but no, I’m not sharing them because 1) my face, 2) Little’s face, 3) shellshock at being touched by this stud ox without having initiated it myself, and 4) the look on my face clearly says MY PANTIES ARE CROOKED AND HIS SWEAT IS SOAKING THROUGH MY SHIRT AND PHEROMONES PEOPLE OMG PHEROMONES I’M IN PAIN HELP I MAY BE PREGNANT

Yeah, he was drenched in sweat from jumping all over that damn stage schlepping a drum that probably weighed more than me.  My hand was on his back and it came away soaked.  You can consider that a euphemism if you want, it works both ways.

Also - red boots.  Urgh.  And then he goes like this:

Boy was solid as a whiskey barrel, let me tell you.  We came back later to listen to another band and he was out there again, and the girls from the face painting tent had lured him over and braided his hair.  He looked flippin cute.  And by cute I mean Jesus Wept.

So before this turns into an exclusive didgeridoo guy fest (too late, yeah I know) let’s move along to this fine specimen that I found at the blacksmith tent:

Ladies and gentlemen, meet King McClary’s work kilt.

Dude was nice from the front too:

Definitely an Auchinleck, for those of you familiar with The McClary Chronicles.  Check out the tattoo.  And he was making maille battle armor, which I got to touch.  It didn’t shift my panties quite as hard as the drums did, but there was definitely a quiver.

This guy was at the tent next door to the armor tent, making I dunno, bong pipes or something and he was hilarious:

And then there was this guy, listening to ballads in the historical folk music tent and looking all angsty and authentic, like his love just died of a fever and his crop failed so he joined a ships’ crew to find his fortune in a faraway land but the damn boat sank fifteen feet from shore and now he’s just fucking stuck in Scotland and contemplating becoming a villain:

And he was glaring at my child, I don’t know why.  Prissy prick.  I was hoping to see his dick but he was so anal he tucked his kilt under his ass from the front.  Definitely a villain.

After a couple of teary ballads about wailing winds and failed crops or whatever, I dunno, I wasn’t listening because I was too involved in trying to see Prissy Prick’s ballsack, we wander over to the Highland Dance competition and walk in on this:

We’re in there for all of about twelve seconds before Big starts giggling, then Little starts giggling, then I start giggling.  We promptly leave the Highland Dance competition tent, because these girls really worked hard and I don’t want to get arrested for being a dick.

We go watch the Mol-pups chase the sheep around, because nobody cares if you disrupt the proceedings in the middle of a field full of sheep.

And then we watch some more of the Highland Games, in which guys threw stuff while making the best faces I’ve seen since that time Husband wanted to try setting the mirror next to the bed:

Yeah, we giggled.

After that we went back to listen to some more music, because damn.  Scottish rock is da bomb.  Heard a punk band that Husband immediately fell in love with, so I guess we’re evensies on the lusting after Scottish musicians thing now:

Dude on the bagpipes grinned like that through the whole set, I think he was puffing something out of one of those tubes.

And then we walked out into the big freaking middle of about four billion of these:

Noisy effers.  And they don’t stop for anybody - we literally had to jump out of the way because when they paused in front of us, they went into this formation thing and backed up right into where we were standing.  Had to grab Little and yank him up off the ground before he was trampled by some dude wearing a dress and giving an octopus a blow job.

Turned to look at a woman sitting next to us a little later and watched her pull a dagger out of her sock and shine it on her kilt like she was getting ready to go assassinate someone in the crowd.  We left soon after, so I didn’t get to see it go down.  I hope it wasn’t the didgeridoo player, he was cute AF.

All in all it was an 11/12 day, marred only by the outrageous heat and the fact that I’ve been off my supplements and medications for a week in prep for surgery on Tuesday, so I was exhausted and my blood’s gone back to being water again.  We didn’t stay as long as we would have otherwise, but we had fun and experienced a lot of weirdness - I ate haggis on accident, Husband sat down with a plate and I thought it was meatloaf (it was good and I didn’t die, so bonus) - and I got to spend the day surrounded by all the clans that tried to assassinate Thomas The Fucking Marauder.

We’ll be going again next year.  Husband is a descendant of one of the border clans, so he’s heavy into this...and of course you all know what my connection is to it :)

Let me leave you with a picture of a guy about to bullrush a scarecrow.  I don’t know why, I didn’t ask.  Scotland’s weird, ya’ll.

[heartturnedtoporcelain-blog]

hey friends. so im done with my last paper of the semester. it was a third of the length it should have been and like i *need* to pass that class (if i went by my other excellent marks in the class (seriously i was doing so so well ;__;) i should be able to pass, but since the paper is worth so much...)

honestly i quit tumblr for the past several days because i knew i was so anxious and feeling so bad that i would make a billion posts to that effect and if i did that i would start worrying why everyone tolerated me on here and that would most likely end up with me quitting the platform altogether - i know this because that scenario happened with twitter and i lost a whole bunch of good twitter friends. so i chose to head it off at the pass this time.

and like i have to admit that several times i had brief moments of being suicidal the past few days - in fact it’s been happening for this past month. those thoughts and feelings were very mild compared to when i last experienced suicidal ideation and i was able to squash them fairly effectively. but still, it sucks to feel that way again and i’ve been hardcore trying to put a more positive emphasis on my life - especially now that i;m free paper writing anxiety for the summer.

one bright thing recently was that i spent hours and hours on sunday in the chapo twitch stream as it was raising money for a trans lifeline and we managed to get to almost 15,000 bucks in 24 hours and it felt good as hell to be part of something so meaningful. plus it was so damn funny and everyone was drunk and/or punch drunk and like 90% of the chat was really good and inclusive and shit (who would guess that a twitch stream could be like that?).

but seriously ive really really missed you all and i’ve missed fannibaling and i hope to be back to proper posting again *fingers crossed* <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

so i wrote this yesterday when i was feeling so damn terrible i can’t even say. a short while later a professor emailed me and was like what’s up with your essay? was there a submission error, do you need an extension? etc. (again i’m super glad that i’m so vocal in class and that i talked to him about my proposal because he knows that i work hard and he knew that i had a good proposal for this paper). and i had to be like sorry but that was all i could manage to do with the paper and that extensions weren’t helping, and he was very kind and empathetic about it all. at that point like all my feelings were building and building and i had to let them out somehow and i had to *force* myself to cry - i have never ever had to force myself to cry before - usually the inverse lol. anyway i had a long good cry and i felt so good and calm afterwards wow. i felt so so much better after it all that that evening i bought myself a big ass bowl of ramen and a big ass ice cream in celebration (the last time i went to a baskin robbins was in montreal several years ago just before i saw a neko case/the national concert (<333333333333) with some pals, so my memory of the place was iffy. a 6 dollar one scoop cone was the size of my friggen head man i didn’t expect that lol but their chocolate peanut butter flavour was sooooo good omg) and basically i’ve felt a lot better since. i mean i’m still anxious and not happy when i can’t sufficiently distract myself, but a hell of a lot of built up badness was let out of my system so many thumbs up lol

[nonbinarysasquatch]

I Need Some Balance

This is probably the funniest episode this show has ever put out and one of the few episodes for which I can find no obvious flaws.

I haven’t rewatched Cats or relistened to any of the soundtracks in a very long time but I loved it as a kid. Is it a good musical? Not really. It has good songs and some entertaining performances but Rebecca’s assessment of it isn’t really wrong.

At its heart, I Need Some Balance is an episode about Rebecca’s vagina and the struggles it faces. Making an episode about her vagina also have it be an entire episode dragging a musical Rachel doesn’t like is one of the most CXGF things CXGF has done.

As I’ve mentioned before, I like when CXGF feels a bit more like a real musical and isn’t just pumping pop music videos out.  In this episode we have five numbers that are better incorporated into the plot than most usually are. I love it.

On the matters of the actual plot…

Jason would be a good option to have Rebecca “end up” with at the end of the series if they want her to be casually dating someone at the end for whom she doesn’t have some weird, complicated past with. He’s boring but kind of weird in the way she’s also kinda weird. That makes him a pretty good fit. No one is ever going to ship and that’s a damn good thing.

Amazingly, the real star of this episode is WhiJo. He’s just so fucking funny as he reacts to the hurtling train that is Greg and Nathaniel becoming friends, not knowing who each other are. It was also nice to see Vic again, however briefly. He’s kind of in the same place as Beth where he’s obviously never going to get much development beyond being the partner of one of the major characters.

Greg feels a little off in this episode. He’s kind of falling into the same thing that has happened to Nathaniel and to a certain extent Josh the last couple of seasons. Which is becoming whatever Rebecca’s narrative needs him to be. Greg is meant to be healthy but he’s suddenly trying to pull off romantic gestures.

I briefly wondered how Greg knew where Rebecca lived but then felt stupid as I remembered that one of his best friends (Hector) lived there for a year. And also Rebecca could’ve easily given him the address while they were at Rebetzels in 4.08. One of those things that feels like a plot hole until you spend a few seconds thinking about it. (And obviously Heather lived there for like a year and a half. There’s opportunities for things like Christmas cards… also possible he could’ve gotten event invites on Facebook, which would’ve shown the address. TLDR, this isn’t a big deal, there’s a billion ways he could know.)

Nathaniel, on the other hand, at least tracks with where he’s at. Which is clearly not being over Rebecca and not dealing with his own problems. I looooved Greg calling Nathaniel out for constantly pointing out that he’s nice. Being a good person is harder work than just doing nice things and pointing out that you are nice.

The ending with all of the guys ending up on Rebecca’s porch is ridiculous and feels like the sort of thing that would normally be played more straight in actual romcoms. But again, really, WhiJo is the star of that plot, even if it’s Greg and Nathaniel’s plots getting moved.

My only complaint about this one is kind of a tiny one. In that it’s not a flaw of this episode in particular but a general one: Valencia gets a lot of screen time but no development of her own. She’s just there to be a supportive friend. Now to some degree, Heather and Valencia have both been simply filling the role Paula used to fill for Rebecca (and it seems obvious the show has been deliberately keeping Paula and Rebecca apart, probably as a setup for the endgame, whatever it might be.) But still. It’s awkward to have two of your characters of colour basically end up just playing the supportive friends who get no depth of their own (though Valencia is far worse off as she hasn’t had meaty development in TWO ENTIRE SEASONS.)

The Songs:

Soooo some of these songs have never been officially posted and tbh I don’t know that I can find much of interest to say about them. Let’s see.

Hungry Vagina Metaphor - Easily the best of these numbers. Riki Lindhome is great.

Itchy Vagina Metaphor - Probably my least favourite despite Fred Armisen.

Funky Vagina Metaphor - Well performed. Can’t remember name of guy who did it.

Elated Vagina Metaphor - Amusing but really isn’t a song.

Nostalgic Vagina Metaphor - Second best number. I have a lot of nostalgia for Memory. Who knew Megan Amram could sing?

I’m not posting ratings anymore (just because I’ve found it too hard to gauge my thoughts… I can’t be as “objective” as I can about older episodes in retrospect.)

But summary: Great episode. Instant classic. If someone wanted an example list of what this show is like by only showing like 5 episodes this would probably be on it. Just one of the funniest fucking things I’ve ever seen.

ETA: OMG I COMPLETELY FORGOT ABOUT DARRYL AND BERT. Anyhow, I love my queer office dads. I kinda ship it.

[theaterdisneynerdsunite]

Tony Awards Thoughts

So it looks like, at least for now, the CBS website lets you watch it for free (at least in the US). Here are my thoughts using those time stamps (be warned I have a long running commentary)

0:23 Oh is this going to be a parody of her playing the piano on last year’s Tony’s

1:05 How has neither one of them won anything? I mean I get if they said neither one of them one a Tony cause I mean, they both did shows that one time…but anything?

1:18 Is there anything more Broadway than saying the same rehearsed thing at the same time and pretending it was just part of the banter? Oh theater tropes I love you

1:36 That’s always been something that bothered me, people assume that just because something didn’t win the Tony doesn’t mean its not a great show, and the show that wins might not even be the best one that season (you know who you are). I love the Tony’s but its an award show, people don’t stop watching tv shows and movies or listening to artists that didn’t win or weren’t nominated, it makes me sad that so many shows close post Tony’s just because they weren’t the big winner. Anyways…

1:53 THEY CELEBRATED THE LOSERS LIKE ME, these A list celebrities that are totally not losers are soooo relatable ;)

2:40 A few years ago Something Rotten did what I thought was a brilliant advertising campaign listing amazing shows that lost the Tonys like them, so the fact that it was put into song gave me a fond flashback. See? SEE??? Oh it feels so good to be vindicated on tv

3:49 “If you make art at all your a part of the cure” :)

4:10 THEY HAD THE ENSEMBLE MEMBERS BE THE ONES IN THE OPENING NUMBER RATHER THAN THE LEADS THIS MAKES ME SO HAPPY. If only my high school self could have seen this she would have felt so much better

6:42 I didn’t see any of the plays this year but I heard the most about Angels in America this season so not surprised. Looks interesting

7:45 Happy Pride Month

8:40 Bake a cake for everyone who wants a cake to be baked would actually be a pretty good diction warmup

14:10 Kinda surprised that they didn’t pick Rather Be Me or Apex Predator considering those are the really marketed songs. “Where We Belong” seems a lot like “Status Quo” from High School Musical. I mean you’ll get that about high school clicks in the lunch room with a blond queen bee but like, even the dance moves felt similar, and the lunch tray dancing, even the giant cat decal. But like, it's not as catchy? I didn’t expect them to win anything tonight but I really don’t think they’ll win anything now? Is that mean? Just cause it feels like it was supposed to be a high energy number and it didn’t have that energy I thought it would. Also come on, just cause you want the girls to be shallow and dumb doesn’t mean the lyrics have to be that cringey. This feels like a less good version of if Legally Blonde and High School Musical had a baby (I absolutely love Legally Blonde that was not intended to be an insult to either show).

15:00 Is it me or did Amy Schumer look like she wanted to say something but Rachel Bloom kept talking. But it didn’t really have any joke setup or serve as a good segway for commentary, what could she have wanted to say?

15:35 Later on I’m going to see if I can find the award speeches that didn’t get televised. most of the world doesn’t get broadway they get regional theater, I wanted to hear what they had to say

15:45 Nick Scandalious feels like a cartoon name you’d see in an Onion article about the Me Too movement. His face even looks like the generic celebrity that had a TMZ scandal five years ago. I thought I read it wrong at first lol

16:40 I was cracking up they know their brand so well. The air quotes on emotional, perfect!

17:10 Mini Sara and Josh are so cute!

17:50 Ok I missed the reference, what is the giant bird lady from?

18:10 oh

20:57 celebrity child picture counter: #3 Amy Schumer. Also guess which year the musical described as “a comedy about class and sexism” is from? Yup it’s My Fair Lady, the audience laughed like I did in that sort of this is funny but also sad kinda way

26:00 This was so overacted and hammy and one day I aspire to that level of loud printed robes. Coincidentally my name is also spelled like Eliza but my voice is not nearly that good. Also does it count as drag if they are clearly men in dresses with some comical makeup or is there another name for it when they aren’t actually trying to look feminine?

26:18 The twitter usernames were too small to see on my screen who were the twitter pictures of?

26:30 See above comment

27:00 What show did Billy Joel work on? Also Billy Joel, Bruce Springsteen, and Josh Groban maybe my mom will finally enjoy theater

29:12 Oh my gosh that picture of Titus Burgess is amazing as is that suit. And that intro is so Titus its great

30:07 Renee Fleming we’ve got the Opera world here too? It’s so many famous musicians from outside broadway on broadway, think of all the crossovers

32:50: Yes spongebob get Josh Groban to sing more thank you for your service. Ok I’m not a huge fan of spongebob but they have to win for sound design that guy is on overload

33:27 Lol it explains so much why the songs sound disjointed cause they got a billion people to write them. Also lol I was waiting for that joke

33:50 Also what I thought would happen would be a medley that way Spongebob who really is the driving energy of the show and Squidward played by the Broadway darling would both have a song. This wasn’t how I expected them to do it, but I was sort of right so I’ll count it. I’m not really a fan of Spongebob the musical (I’ve listened to it twice once when it first came out and once during Tony Season. I’m not one of the people who hate it off the sheer premise and won’t give it a chance, but I just thought it was meh and not worth having the most nominations.) But Squidward’s song is very me, not in terms of melody cause that is I find most of the melodies to be rather generic but the lyrics are 100% me trying to convince myself. Also all I will be thinking about for the rest of the will be what tap dancing must feel like its gotta feel weird how long do you think he spent practicing it with and without the extra legs. Or it might be nightmare fuel with the sea anemone contributing to it, who knows? Probably both,

38:07 still don’t know whose handles those are

38:28 ^^^

38:40 Ok when I saw the outfits I was expecting a Chorus Line Parody, but this Sia parody fits this every genre but musical theater theme of this Broadway season

39:20 Eight times a week, and all the subsequent puns

40:28 Can I just say I love this return to singing interludes over awkward award show banter?

41:44 I saw the Bands Visit a few month’s back and I still don’t know how to describe it. Normally I would guess it would be the second fiddle of the Tony’s but considering the “purists” it’ll probably win most of the awards

44:16 With all the previous reaction shots you knew it had to be Nathan Lane. I always forget how well spoken he is because of his typical roles but he is really well spoken and sincere rather than trying to wise crack and it was so sweet. It made me smile

47:43 His face saying “blow high” has got to be a gif right?

51:45 The entirety of the Carousel number was me thinking if I had a higher sex drive this would totally make me thirsty. They also used very creative ways to physically embody the shape and workings of a ship but then again I’m admittedly biased. Listen to that number you know their vocal prowess was not why they picked it

52:12 I mean, I know that crew gets less attention than cast and plays less attention than musicals but I would watch the full version stop cutting out the speeches. C’mon I love costumes

53:04 I know your joking but that hurts

53:19 yes #4 famous kid photo Uzo Aduba

55:49 Ari'el Stachel’s speech is made all the more poignant when you realize everyone else in his category were white. Despite this season’s commerciality you actually do have shows and casts with Asian leads and African American leads and Latin American leads and Middle Eastern leads somewhere between the sea of shows like Spongebob and Frozen. Show these shows some love, prove that Hamilton wasn’t the anomaly but the rule

56:55 They brought the Parkland teacher for the theater education award! Fitting 65 students into a high school teacher’s office for hours to protect them is not easy, she saved lives that day

58:17 I thought #5 Matthew Morrison was a girl in his child pic

58:40 They went to Parkland?!

59:35 OMG they’re performing!?!

1:00:10 Seasons of Love is the Perfect song for this, they sound so good too!

1:01:18 Girl has an amazing voice! Dang to get up there in front of all of these famous performers on live TV after the media has already hounded them and putting yourself out there is courageous

1:02:45 I can’t see the handles

1:03:11 Will they be able to top NPH’s Tony magic trick though??? Probably not but let’s see

1:03:31 So cheesy but tbh if I had a Harry Potter wand I’d be even cheesier

1:03:46 Was that line improved or was the tech delay intentional?

1:04:22 C’mon Squidward already pulled the same “trick” you have ensemble block the audience pov while someone enters from the back. Didn’t even come close to topping NPH

1:04:43 Little Patti Lupone I can’t believe she allowed them to include her picture of lil’ Patti

1:05:04 I just wanted to include Patti’s line about a “deep appreciation for outspoken women” cause I actually said “you go girl” out loud

1:05:35 Yeah, fun fact, Tony wasn’t a man but was actually short for Antoinette. They referenced it multiple times before, including earlier tonight, but it was stated most explicitly here

1:06:35 Is that a young or modern Claire Danes, I can’t tell

1:07:39 Also it’s really cool that an older woman won something, I feel like the stage gives more roles for older woman that other acting industries, also if people argue that she was political she served political office. Also how cool is it that apparently people were there from every recognized country?

1:09:27 so that’s how they do Sven, I knew Olaf was supposed to be an Avenue Q style puppet but the way they move Sven is really cool (it’s the technique they used on things like War Horse, I don’t know if it’s considered costuming or puppetry or what the official name is)

1:10:20 Anna looks exactly as I pictured her, and they changed a few minor lyrics for it to fit the stage

1:10:44 There are so many quick changes tonight

1:11:22 Elsa did not look like what I imagined her to be, but the costumes are on point

1:12:00 The chorus versions of these songs have beautiful harmony, but Olaf shouldn’t be there yet right? Isn’t he “born” in Let it Go

1:12:47 Alright I’ve been waiting to see how they’ll do the snow effects!

1:14:00 They got out of building the castle by already having it built at the beginning of the song, which is smart technically but I wanted to see how they do it, unless it’s one of those things that’s a surprise for when you see it live.

1:14:25 Never call it “Daddy’s Day” ever again. Never.

1:14:46 I can’t see the handles

1:14:59 How could you not show Chita Rivera’s lifetime achievement? I’ve been lucky enough to see her in more than one show and she is incredible.

1:15:13 And you also cut out Andrew Lloyd Webber’s?? You made the wrong cuts Broadway

1:15:25 It looks like they’re going to show a tribute I’m excited!!!

1:17:42 Two things: Andrew Lloyd Webber has written a weird collection of musicals, like when you see clips of them back to back you realize just how weird of a collection it is, and Josh Groban needs to be the next Phantom

1:18:08 That exchange was so physically awkward they haven’t even started talking yet and I feel the cringe

1:19:18 Is “I swore I’d never do something like that” shade against the La La Land debacle? In 2018? Or am I reading too much into it

1:19:21 I saw the Band’s Visit but I also saw Once on this Island and I thought that one would win Direction for sure but I guess I was wrong

1:22:36 I read Harry Potter and the Cursed Child, it’s a weird read, but I haven’t seen it live so maybe it’s directed brilliantly, who knows? Who else thinks its a weird read?

1:23:56 He’s getting the Tony audience to sing his boyfriend "Happy Birthday" instead of giving a speech and that is both adorably sweet and such a power move. Also a rare occasion of Happy Birthday being sung on key

1:25:10 They’re having DEH perform? You cut out people who actually were awarded tonight for people who already were featured on the Tony’s last year? And that song is a weird choice for a In Memoriam considering that show doesn’t really…respect the deceased. Weird

1:28:17 Give the tech more time in the limelight! You cut out Chita and Webber’s speeches for a weird tribute and you have weird stunts with tech like the magic thing yet cut out all their stage time. I know this is standard Tony procedure but it is something I will comment on every year until it changes

1:29:20 That move for “work hard for the money mom” line was uncomfortable

1:30:30 They really do sound like the original singer

1:31:53 So that’s how the performers follow the conductor. They have a huge teleprompter-like screen in the back of the audience

1:32:52 This cast seems specifically tailored to gather different subsections of internet geeks and I will not tell you which categories I fall into

1:33:18 I never knew “the Jimmy’s” were a thing when I was in high school

1:34:54 THOSE are the great themes of Harry Potter? Really?

1:36:10 Aww look at little Cinderella

1:36:34 How are they going to build that stage for the Tonys? They built a river inside the theater for it before!

1:37:00 Well it makes sense that they’d only include part of the set, you can’t really recreate an entire building. Yes I’m so glad they included Mama Will Provide. That song is like the definition of a Tony performance song. Why did they include the Daniel bit, that was so awkward and broke up the flow

1:40:40 If anyone would be chill with the goat it’s Nathan Lane. Yup, there a live goat at the Tony Awards

1:41:21 Don’t joke about that

1:41:41 Are you going to cut out every technical award

1:42:32 Too relatable

1:43:16 Is this that song from Chorus Line in real life

1:44:10 English Major life

1:46:03 The angel from Angels in America is so Extra TM

1:46:54 That Tony Kushner line was forced

1:47:18 Awkward segway but REMEMBER TO VOTE

1:47:38 That Judy Garland line ties in perfectly with the Happy Birthday to the gay couple

1:48:04 That reaction to the word “money” is me. And also is a gif right?

Am I so much of a Tony nerd that I both knew and was shocked that the accountants weren’t the normal ones from Ernst and Young but instead were from Grant Thorton. Why do I remember what company normally tallies the Tony votes? Why did they change companies? Why do I care so much? But seriously what happened

1:49:00 That phrase just sounded so odd, just the way it was said “my television Daddy-O Tony Shalhoub”

1:53:15 I don’t have the accent and I’m about as white as white can be, but I really want to perform this song somewhere at some point. I have family in this area even though I don’t look like I would but and I just connect to it. The melody is gorgeous and the chorus reminds me of the lullabies of when I was very little.

1:54:15 Every time the young photos come up it puts a small smile on my face

1:54:37 Good on them for putting their money where their mouth is. They actually helped fund arts programs in places where they were cut

1:55:05 I wonder what the rest of the scenic guy’s speech for Spongebob was because this tiny clip seemed so passionate (and just has such an interesting aesthetic). Gosh darn it Tonys stop pretending the only backstage people that count are the directors and producers, you have all these other people who put in so much hard work yet you consistently ignore them. Even orchestrations, choreography and score?? Orchestrations, choreography and score are crucial for musicals to exist as unique entities from plays. You make jokes about people sitting through 5 hour plays but I would gladly sit through a five hour award show if you just included the technical awards.

1:57:10 me trying to open anything ever

1:57:14 Yes! I was so worried they would go with the super old school ones that get constant revivals. I mean, they picked the show that had “1000 pounds of sand, a 100 gallons of water, a goat and 2 chickens into his theater” when you have safer, more conventional bets. Everyone kept sleeping on Once on this Island this Tony season to talk about their feelings about the Spongebob’s and Mean Girl’s of the world but this is such a good show. Maybe this’ll get this show the love it deserves.

1:59:30 what did Robert DeNiro say on the recording the sound cut out. Did the mic cut out did he say something inappropriate, I’ve been avoiding Tony news what happened?

1:59:55 It’s got more than just a big cast, dancing, and a history lesson. You know that applies to, idk like 60% of famous Broadway musicals lol

2:00:06 when someone gives that pregnant of a pause you gotta wonder what the story is there

2:00:27 Truth

2:00:40 “Jersey Boy” that’s such a good one liner, actually, it might sound sarcastic online but that was a funny one liner in context

2:03:00 Is Bruce Springsteen really going to just do spoken word poetry the whole time? Also I don’t know why but this makes me think of Fun Home

2:06:05 Oh he’s going to sing after all. Though that story is about as Americana Fourth of July as anything I’ve ever heard on the Tony Awards ever and that’s saying something

2:07:39: who are these people?

2:08:00 Didn’t Kristin Chenowitz and Alan Cumming do this exact same shtick when they hosted, what 2 years ago? And there’s was much bigger I mean really go big like that Glinda the Good dress or go home.

2:08:23 Was there really no punch line? Also aww baby Kelli O’Hara is precious

2:09:07 The actor’s name sounds like his character’s name and I enjoy that

2:09:39 Well these actors are very different from each other

2:11:28 I am a sucker for genuine sincerity and that combined with some of the earlier moments like the Parkland moment brought me close to tears

2:12:45 Look at this award shows actual diversity, and not just using one show for diversity and nominating a bunch of actors you have 3 out of 6 female leads be people of color and none of them are a “token” and they all support each other. Hailey Kilgore is so young and such a good actress and I wanted her to win so much but she seemed so excited for the person who did win and they all seem happy at the result you don’t have any of that polite loser face they are all genuinely supportive and this makes me happy. I’m happy, look at those smiles I’m smiling, I love it when they show women supporting each other.

12:14:06 “my stupid little heart with so much joy” is me watching these people tonight.

12:14:27 Still can’t identify these people

12:15:00 Josh Groban’s reaction to Bernadette Peter’s name is me. Honestly Josh Groban is killing the potential gif game tonight

I’m sorry I just can’t take this description of them as “empowering stories” seriously when half of your nominations are Spongebob and Mean Girls

2:16:10 Tonight the Band’s Visit really swept. Honestly some seasons shows don’t win any awards that deserved it and other seasons shows that (while still deserving) probably wouldn’t have won win and it’s all kind of arbitrary, but I’m glad out of this batch it won, it was really the only show out of the four that would have gotten the Tony Award ticket sales boost and it got it.

2:17:35 “Music gives people hope and makes borders disappear”

2:19:08 yes another Josh Groan duet!

2:19:25 I love Miss Peters too

2:20:44 This number made me smile, this whole night made me smile. I was worried I would get frustrated by the night with Spongebob and Frozen and Mean Girls and all the potential for it to be a cynical snark fest or a capitalist money grabber spectacular. There are about 10 billion ways I saw myself not liking this year’s Tony Awards before it started and not only am I relieved that I was wrong about the mood of the night but I am elated. I love me some deadpan humor and some snark but you rarely see one of these nights just wholly be genuine and not tongue and cheek and it was such a breath of fresh air. Even the hokey bits like the stupid magic jokes and banter or weaker songs like that Mean Girls number, because everything was in such a kindhearted atmosphere, didn’t feel as bad as they otherwise would have.