#I’ve been called so many slurs here

[jonathanstims]

I can never go back home.

[latenightreadingpdf]

Spencer's Secret - Spencer Reid

₊‧⁺˖⋆ Masterlist ⋆˖⁺‧₊

Summary: All Spencer wanted was to finish his paperwork and go home, but now he’s in a bar, drunk, and confessing all his secrets to Derek.

⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆

The team had barely settled back into the office after a grueling case when Derek threw an arm over Emily’s shoulder, talking about needing a drink. Emily agreed with a weary smile, and soon enough, JJ, Penelope, and Rossi had chimed in, all eager to unwind together. Somehow, they’d even managed to convince Hotch, who gave them a reluctant nod, his rare smile hinting he could use a break too.

All that was left was Spencer. Sitting at his desk, he was hunched over, diligently finishing up his paperwork, when Derek strolled over and leaned in with his usual, "Hey, pretty boy."

Spencer looked up, already anticipating the question. "No, Derek, I’m not going."

Derek raised an eyebrow, feigning innocence. "I didn’t even get to ask!"

"Doesn’t matter. I’m not going," Spencer replied firmly, looking back down at his files.

"Come on, kid," Derek urged, his voice dropping to a softer, pleading tone. "Just this once. If you come, I’ll never ask again. I swear."

Spencer let out a sigh, the exhaustion of the day finally catching up with him. There was a beat of silence as he mulled it over, glancing at the hopeful faces of his teammates nearby. Finally, he closed his file, resigned. "Fine," he muttered, “but just this once."

Derek’s face broke into a grin, practically bouncing on his feet. "You heard him, guys—he’s in! Let’s go before he changes his mind."

Spencer reluctantly stood up, pulling on his coat with a sigh. He glanced around, noticing the others already gathering their things, excitement buzzing among them. As they all filed out together, Penelope slung an arm around Spencer, giving him a reassuring squeeze.

"Oh, Spence, you’ll have fun. Trust me," she said, winking.

Spencer managed a small, hesitant smile, wondering just what he was getting himself into. It wasn’t exactly his ideal night out, but surrounded by his friends, he couldn’t help but feel a faint sense of anticipation growing despite himself.

⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆

As soon as the team settled into the bar, the weight of the last case started to fade. They ordered the first round, eager to drink, laugh, and let loose for a few hours. The drinks flowed freely, and soon they were deep in conversation, sharing old stories and laughing harder with each passing round. Spencer, who rarely drank, was feeling more than a little tipsy. Nights like these weren’t really his scene—he usually found it far more comfortable to stay home. But now, with the warm buzz in his head and his friends around, he was actually enjoying himself.

Meanwhile, Derek had been off flirting at the bar, but eventually made his way back to the booth, where Spencer was the last one still sitting. Derek, who could hold his liquor well, was only slightly buzzed. He noticed Spencer's dazed expression and grinned, sliding into the seat next to him. "Pretty boy," he said, nudging him, "there are so many gorgeous women here tonight. You should go try and have some fun, maybe even get a date."

Spencer, a little too drunk to filter his thoughts, shook his head. "Don’t need a date," he said, his words slurring slightly.

Derek raised an eyebrow, smirking. "Oh yeah? And why’s that?"

Spencer’s face softened, and he blurted, “I’ve got an amazing girlfriend at home.”

"Right, sure," Derek teased, not at all convinced. "So what’s her name?"

Spencer’s face lit up. "Y/N," he said, his voice full of adoration. He leaned in, eyes dreamy, and started rambling. “She’s incredible, Derek. So smart, so beautiful. She’s way out of my league—I still can’t believe she’s with me.”

Derek chuckled, noticing just how drunk Spencer was. It was getting late, and he knew Spencer would never make it home on his own. “Why don’t you call Y/N to pick you up, then?” he said, jokingly.

Spencer’s face brightened, and he fumbled for his phone. Derek watched in amusement as he dialed, still skeptical, until he heard a faint “Hello?” from the other end.

Spencer’s face lit up even more. “Hello, my love,” he said, voice thick with affection.

You let out a soft laugh on the other side of the line. “Hey, Spence! Everything alright?”

Spencer grinned, completely forgetting why he’d called. “Yeah,” he said dreamily. “I just…wanted to hear your pretty voice.”

You laughed, clearly touched. Derek, now genuinely surprised that someone had actually answered, took the phone from Spencer, holding it up to his ear. "Hello?" he asked, still a bit skeptical.

"Uh, hi,” you replied, a little confused. “Who is this?"

Derek cleared his throat. “This is Derek. Spencer friend.”

“Oh! Nice to finally meet you, Derek, Spencer talks about you and the team quite a bit.” you said, sounding amused. “I’m Y/N, his girlfriend.”

Derek muttered, “Holy shit, you’re real.”

"Sorry?" you asked, sounding puzzled.

“Nothing, nothing,” he chuckled. “Listen, Spencer’s had a bit too much to drink. Are you able to pick him up?”

You let out a soft, understanding laugh. “Yeah, of course. Just tell me where you guys are.”

Derek gave you the address and hung up, handing the phone back to Spencer. "Your girlfriend’s coming to get you," he said, still slightly in awe that Spencer’s been hiding a girlfriend from them.

Spencer’s eyes lit up even more. “Y/N?” he asked eagerly.

“Yeah, pretty boy, Y/N,” Derek replied, shaking his head with a grin.

Spencer slumped back in his seat with a satisfied sigh. “Finally,” he mumbled. “Someone cool to hang out with.”

Derek just laughed, patting Spencer on the shoulder. He sat down with Spencer and waited with him for Y/N to get there, eager to meet her.

⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆

As Spencer was still happily rambling to Derek about his incredible girlfriend, the door opened, and a beautiful woman stepped into the bar. Spencer’s eyes widened instantly. "Y/N!" he exclaimed, jumping up so quickly he nearly tripped. He stumbled over to you, practically throwing himself into your arms, clinging to you like he’d just found his lifeline. He buried his face in your neck, a contented sigh escaping him.

You wrapped your arms around him, laughing softly at his drunken enthusiasm. "Looks like someone had a good time," you teased, rubbing his back.

“Missed you so much,” he mumbled into your neck, his words muffled but unmistakably fond.

Looking up, you noticed a man standing a few steps behind Spencer, observing the two of you with an amused grin. "You must be Derek," you said, offering him a warm smile.

Derek smiled back, giving a nod. "Nice to finally meet you. I’ve heard a lot about you tonight."

Before you could respond, Spencer had already started tugging you gently toward the exit. You glanced back at Derek and gave him a quick smile. "Hopefully we can actually talk sometime soon," you said, laughing as Spencer clung to your arm.

Derek chuckled, nodding. "I’d like that. Take care of him. Goodnight, Y/N."

He watched as you guided a tipsy, lovesick Spencer out of the bar, a soft smile still on his face. Just then, Penelope popped up beside him, curiosity sparkling in her eyes. “What are you staring at?” she asked, following his gaze to the exit.

“Spencer’s got a girlfriend,” Derek said, unable to keep a little laugh from escaping as he recalled the whole scene.

Penelope’s eyes went wide, and she gasped, practically bouncing in place. "Wait, what?! Our Spencer? Oh my God, I need details!"

Derek smirked, shaking his head. "Calm down, babygirl. You can interrogate him tomorrow," he teased.

Penelope pouted, but the excitement was already building. After a second, she sighed dramatically, then brightened up again and grabbed Derek’s hand. “Fine! But right now, you’re dancing with me.”

Derek let her pull him to the dance floor, chuckling as he made a mental note to tease Spencer about this night for a long time.

⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆

[rafesangelita]

[🍪] chocolate chip cookie, includes; a fic inspired by a song of your choice!

maybe frat!rafe or either dealer!rafe (👀) with friends by chase atlantic😁😁😁😁😁😁😁they’re at a party and all her friends are fucked up and yk HAKSJDKD

₊˚⊹ᰔ 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬

pairing: dealer!rafe x fem!reader

summary: ❝all of your friends have been here for too long, they must be waiting for you to move on. girl, i’m not with it, i’m way too far gone.❞ — after confessing his feelings for you, rafe gets nervous and leaves you the following morning. now you two are at a party, and he isn’t leaving without you.

warnings: friends w benefits au, mentions of drinking and dealing of drugs, arguing, suggestive ending

word count: 0.7k

a/n: wrote this with s2 rafe in mind..

you were the only sober one at this party. along with rafe, who never drank when he was dealing, and vowed to never get high on his own supply. you knew he’d be here— a party wasn’t a party if rafe wasn’t serving up people in the corner of the living room. you stared at him from a distance, his eyes occasionally finding yours when he looked up from the stacks of money on the table. you hated how good he looked tonight. skin flushed with a sheen of sweat from having so many people around him, his bangs hanging loosely in his face, with that blue jeans and white t-shirt combo that you loved so much.

you swallowed thickly, your trance being broken when one of your, very drunk, friends grabbed onto your arm for support. “stop looking at himmm!” she slurred, cackling when you rolled your eyes. “he just wants you for himself without any real commitment.” she nearly lost her footing, a yelp leaving her lips as you decided to guide her out of the kitchen. while your friend wasn’t all the way wrong, she didn’t know enough about you and rafe’s ‘situationship’ to form an opinion on it. your friends only knew what you told them, which meant they’ve only ever heard your annoyed rants.

“let’s get you over here..” you sat her down on the couch where the rest of your friends drunkenly talked amongst each other. rafe wasn’t far from where you sat, his laugh echoing in your ears as he started stuffing his black backpack full of cash. you could tell by the smile on his face that he had a good night for shop. sensing that you were looking at him, rafe felt the burn of your gaze as he got up, having no intention of leaving this party without you on his arm. you smelled his cologne before he approached you, the scent making your heart flutter in your chest.

“hey, can we talk?” rafe stopped in front of you, your friends turning around at the sound of his voice. you looked up at him, cursing under your breath at how handsome he was. “leave her alone, asshole!” rafe smiled at your friend, flipping her off before getting you up and taking you outside. “your friends are annoying as fuck.” he stopped by his truck, backing you up against the vehicle until his thigh sat comfortably between your legs. you knew what he was doing. “they’re drunk..” you glared at him, “what do you want?” rafe tilted his head at your words. “what do i want?” he repeated.

“you gonna act like you weren’t staring me down in there?” he laughed, cupping your chin. “you look pretty.” turning your head away from him, you shrugged him off as you arched a brow. “i was looking at you, and?” you ignored his little compliment. “..and you haven’t replied to any of my messages or called me back.. why?” you shook your head. “are you seriously asking me this? you tell me you have feelings for me while you’re inside of me, and then leave without a word in the morning? excuse me if i felt like you were toying with me or something.” you crossed your arms over your chest.

“i got nervous, alright! but i swear to you i meant every word. i would never mess with you like that..” he stepped closer. “i’ve been wanting this, us, for a long time, y/n. i’m not good at this stuff, but i want to try, i want to do it with you.” your gaze softened. “do you mean that?” your voice was small, a clear indication that you weren’t trying to argue with him anymore. “i fucking swear by it.” you watched as his jaw clenched. “i wont disappoint you, baby.” finally, for the first time in two weeks, he took you in his arms. you sighed, feeling a weight you didn’t know was there, lift off of your shoulders.

“is this a revenge dress?” you laughed when he pulled away, inspecting your outfit. “no, but it worked.” you teased. rafe leaned down and kissed you, in which you wasted no time in returning. “come on, let’s get out of here.. ‘before your friends threaten me.” you let him place you in the passenger seat, a squeal leaving your lips when he landed a harsh smack to your ass.

[somanyratsinthewalls]

Hi! congrats for 700 followers!! 🫶🏼🫶🏼🫶🏼 i love your fics and one shots <3

following the game… can i suggest Navy (ofc) Rabbit and if possible starfish too 🥺🥺🥺

Thank you 🫶🏼

HI SORRY THIS TOOK A BILLION YEARS BUT GUESS WHAT IT'S DONE NOW :) thank you for your patience sweet friend

Pairing: Trafalgar Law x Female Reader

Trope/Prompt: Friends to Lovers x Body Worship

Summary: Law finds out you've never had an orgasm. A doctor treats a patients ailments. You get the idea. MINORS DNI

WC: 3100 hehe

TWs: inexperienced reader, alcohol consuption, fingering, oral sex f receiving, power dynamic kinda, smooth talking Law, body worship and praise, pet names, ugh it's porn.

Climax (+18)

——

Sure, the Heart Pirates weren’t the scariest or the biggest or the baddest pirate crew out there… but they were still pirates at the end of the day. The Heart Pirates could drink. Although Law himself didn’t indulge in as many rowdy evenings as the other members of his crew, he still enjoyed socializing with them. They were his crew, after all. 

This particular evening, Law found himself bored of his work and decided to venture out from his office and into the common areas of the ship. Law shuffled tiredly towards the sound of glasses clinking and slurred voices talking over each other. He almost decides to turn back to his bedroom and try to get some shut eye. His back ached, the twinge in his muscles pleading with him to go to sleep, but he hears something else. Your lilted giggle floats through the metal halls of the submarine and straight into his ears. He wanted to at least see you before he went to bed… something sweet to think about as he fell asleep… 

“Yeah, okay well you’re stupid, so.” You sip from your freshly cracked beer and roll your eyes at Shachi. 

“Wow! What a good insult, y/n! You’re so fucking creative!” Shachi jeers at you with a big fake smile on his face. “I set you up, and you lost! You have to finish your drink, I don’t care that you just opened a new one!” 

“Unless you want me to barf on your cards, probably not.” You chuckle. 

“And I have seen her throw up. It is NOT cute.” Ikkaku pipes up. Ikkaku leans in and whispers purposefully loudly to Penguin. “Shes a scream-puker.”

“Okay so, I am not a scream-puker!” You defend yourself. 

“Yeah, you are.”

Your head whips around towards the galley door. Law stands there leaning against the frame, looking exhausted, but that wasn’t out of the ordinary for him. 

“Last time you had the flu I thought we were under attack and sounded the Tang’s defensive alarm.” Law says as he smirks at you. 

You pout and turn back to the table. 

“Okay that one time… and I was really sick, you know!” You huff. 

“Room for one more?” Law grabs a beer out of the fridge and sits down at the dining table without waiting for a response. 

“Of course, Captain!” Ikkaku chimes in. “We were just telling Shachi he has to finally tell that girl from the last island to stop calling him.” 

“She’s sooooo hot though! And she’s totally into me!” Shachi pleads his case. 

“We will never see her again!” You interject. 

“So? She doesn’t know that! And besides, the phone sex is better than nothing-” 

“You’re having phone sex? Here? On my ship?” Law immediately butts in and cocks his head in confusion. 

“… is that? Is that not cool? Did we have a rule about that or something?” Shachi questions. 

“No.. it’s just vile, Shachi.” Law shakes his head. 

“Hah! He thinks you’re fuckin’ gross!” Ikkaku points and laughs directly at Shachi who was making quite the face. You couldn’t help but laugh. 

“Oh whatever, I’ve been getting the best sleep of my life thanks to this! I’m like, almost twice as productive as I normally am!” He tries to build his case back up. 

“Why?” You ask, curious what those things had to do with each other. 

“What do you mean? Everyone knows how great the sleep is after you finish, am I wrong?” 

“You are correct there.” Penguin adds, sipping his beer. Ikkaku hums in agreement.

“Hah, okay. Wouldn’t know.” You add softly, secretly hoping no one would hear you. 

“What?” Ikkaku turns to you and asks. 

“Nothing it’s just that I… wouldn’t…? Know..?” Really pleading with your eyes for her to read between the lines and you wouldn’t have to say it out loud yourself. 

“Wait okay… you’ve never… had an orgasm?” Ikkaku’s eyes widen. 

“Correct.” You take a deep breath. “At least I don’t think I have.” You feign a laugh. 

“Oh you’d KNOW.” Shachi affirms from across the table, also staring at you with a bewildered expression. “Woah… that’s crazy. Are you a virgin or something?” He continues. 

“No!” You defend yourself. “The guys I’ve been with just suck, apparently. Can we stop talking about this?” You knit your eyebrows together and rub your eyes. 

“No way this is fascinating. How old are you? Twenty five? And you’ve never had an orgasm? Like never once? Even by yourself?” Ikkaku probes further. 

“Oooookay guys I never miss a good time to shut the fuck up, so I am going to head to bed!” You stand up from the table and straighten out your boiler suit. You were met with pleas and apologies from your crew mates, while your captain remained stoic during the entire exchange. You felt his eyes burning a hole through you as you left the galley. 

You swiftly make your way through the metal corridors of the ship towards your stateroom. You weren’t upset at your crew mates, it really was fascinating how you had made it this long in your life without feeling the peak of physical pleasure. It wasn’t for lack of trying, you had tried several times to pleasure yourself… and taken a small handful of lovers, none of whom could make you cum. 

You slip off your boiler suit and let it fall to the floor in an off-white heap. You pick out some grey pajamas, a thin camisole and matching shorts, throw it on and sit on your bed to brush out your hair. You untie your hair from the thick bun on your head and let it cascade down your bare shoulders. 

You had almost finished brushing our your locks when you notice the room has somehow changed… as if in the blink of an eye everything was sheathed in a faint blue glow. A familiar blue… 

“Wait no!” You could barely yelp out before you ass meets a different surface in an instant. “Ah!” You gasp and open your eyes to see that you’re no longer in your own bed, but in Law’s. You blink rapidly for a few moments to try and regain your surroundings. You catch your breath. 

You look up and see Law standing at the edge of his bed, looking at you with his shirt unbuttoned. Did he already have it unbuttoned when you were drinking… or did he take it off since then…? 

“Gods, Law.” You sigh and shake your head. “You can’t keep doing that to people. You could have just called my snail or something.” 

“Heard Shachi’s been keeping the line busy tonight.” Law looks down at your barely covered form on his bed. You push your legs up to your chest and wrap your arms around them. He smirks. “So… is it true?” Law walks slowly around to the side of the bed, eyes never leaving yours. He was like an animal stalking its prey. 

“T-the orgasm thing?! T-thats what you brought me here to talk about?!” You could feel your cheeks flush bright red. You sink your head further behind your legs. “I-it’s really not a big deal…” You turn your eyes down to avoid his gaze. 

“You know, the human orgasm is really just a tool.” Law continues eyeing your body and ignoring what you had just said. “The reason it feels so good goes back to our earliest days of evolution. All living organisms, even plants, exist with one similar purpose in common. Do you know what that is, y/n?”

You pick your head up a bit from behind your knees. 

“T-to… n-not get eaten by a larger thing?” You sputter out.

“Reproduction.” Law answers his own question. “Every creature is designed with a primal need to create more of itself…” He paces towards his nightstand and back before taking his massive sword off his back and setting it against the bedpost. “The male orgasm is necessary for human reproduction, obviously. But the female orgasm…” He trails off and you look up and lock eyes. “Is it a bit more complicated…” 

“O-okay?”

“Some professionals say the spasming of the female reproductive organs during orgasm allows for easier penetration through the cervix for the ejaculate to pass through… and some say the female orgasm doesn’t even exist at all…” 

“Are you seriously doctor-ing me about this?!?” You finally find your voice a bit stronger in your throat. “I’ve lived this long without it and-“

“I however, y/n, don’t care what the purpose of it is. And I do know it exists. And I plan on giving you at least one this evening.” Law says as he sheds his button down off his shoulders, letting it fall to the floor. Tattoos on full display, his chiseled abdominal muscles right at your eye level paired with the topic of conversation made you press your legs together even harder. 

“C-captain that is highly unnecessary and unprof-“ You try to protest shakily. 

“Nonsense.” Law steps so his thighs are against the edge of the bed. His right hand comes up to drag two fingers up your calf and rest his palm on your knee. He rubbed soft circles onto your knee with his thumb. “Now if you’re done being so stubborn, we can get started.” 

You leaned back on your elbows and blinked up at the man standing before you, your captain. You couldn’t believe this was really happening, but you were too stunned to question it. You trusted him with your life and more, why not let him try and help you?

“Alright.” You say softly, more to yourself than to Law. 

“Good. Now take your clothes off.” 

You cock your head back in surprise and your eyes widen. 

“Getting straight to it I guess…” You chuckle nervously. 

“We can go slower, if you’d like?” Law takes his hand off your leg, a genuine look of care in his grey eyes. 

“No no! I-it’s fine! I just didn’t, you know… like… well I wasn’t really planning for anyone to see me naked tonight is all!” You say awkwardly. 

“The only thing I care about tonight is pleasuring you. Will you let me?”

You don’t say anything in response, but you lift your thin grey camisole over your head and throw it to the floor. You didn’t look up to see Law’s response, you just shimmied your shorts down your legs and resumed your position laying on Law’s bed. 

Fully bare in front of your captain, you could feel your cheeks become hotter than they’ve ever been. 

“So what should-“ You begin.

“Fucking gorgeous.” Law interrupts. 

“S-sorry?” You question. 

“You are so fucking hot. So pretty.” Law was no longer staring into your eyes, but raking his gaze all over your naked body. “Spread your legs for me, yah?” Law asks, a bit more pleading than his normal demanding tone. It was like something shifted in him once you had taken your clothes off. He returns his hand to your knee, bringing his other hand as well this time to gently push your legs open to expose your sex to him. You hear him suck in a breath. 

Suddenly, Law pounces on you. You’re knocked back on the bed further and your head hits the mattress. Law chuckles playfully above you as he supports himself on his hands, black shaggy hair falling towards your face. 

“Hi.” He grins down at you. 

“H-hi..” You manage to smile back. Law leans down further and begins placing wet kisses along your neck, craning your head to the side almost involuntarily.  “O-oh okay.. t-that’s fine… AH!” You feel a cold hand pinch your left nipple.  

“So sensitive… this is going to be easy..” You feel Law’s mouth curve into a smile as he litters more kisses on you, this time across your collarbone. He moves his head lower and captures your right nipple in his soft lips and sucks gently. You let out a long sigh and throw your head back against the mattress further. Quiet gasps left your mouth as he worked your chest in his hands and tongue. 

Without fully realizing that Law’s hand had left your breast, you feel it cup your mound firmly without warning. You try to close your legs instinctively at the sudden contact. 

“Ah ah, no y/n. You’ve been hiding this pretty thing from me for too long.” Law says as he pulls back from your chest. He pressed his fingers against the top of your slit and started rubbing it in circles. “I promise it’ll feel so good.”  

Law leans up and places a gentle kiss on your parted mouth, you were too dazed to kiss him back just yet. He pulls away and settles himself on the floor on his knees in front of where you were laying. Strong arms hook under your knees and drag you swiftly so that your legs were hanging off the bed and your sex was mere inches from his hungry gaze and spit-slicked lips. 

“Even more fucking beautiful than I’d imagined…” Law says as he spreads your pussy with his thumb and forefinger, exposing your throbbing clit and dripping hole to him. “So eager and ready for me…” 

“Wait you imagi- SHIT!” You cry out as you feel Law’s hot tongue lap at your clit. It was so good, so thoughtful, so precise… he knew exactly what he was doing. “Oh my god-“ You had never received better head and he was only just getting started… maybe he was going to fulfill his promise. He alternative between suckling at your sensitive pearl and taking wide swaths over your whole sex with his entire mouth, as if he was trying to drink up every last drop your pussy was offering him. 

“So sweet…” You could barely understand what Law was muttering about, he was so drunk off your essence that all you could really hear was pained moans and groans of “mmhmmpph” as he enjoyed your taste. Your back was arching off the bed and you grabbed at Law’s hair, pulling him impossibly closer to you as you wanted to make sure he kept going. 

You moaned loudly as he slipped two fingers into your eager hole. He distracted you with harsh sucks to your clit as he crooked his fingers upwards inside of you. 

“Wait fuck!” You cry out, feeling a foreign sensation as Law pulled on that spot inside your walls. 

“Yeah there it is baby… there it is right there… let it happen…” Law cooed into your wetness as he continued to hammer into your sweet spot with his two fingers. He resumed his ministrations on your clit. 

“Law! I can’t!” You gasp as that warmth and pressure in your lower half grew stronger and tighter. 

“You can… get out of that pretty little head of yours, babe. Stop thinking and just let it go…” 

You try to center yourself and clear your mind, eliminating all thoughts except for the feeling of Law’s hands and mouth on you. It wasn’t hard to do, his presence took over your every sense entirely… the heady smell of his cedar cologne, the absolute determined and lust-filled look in his eyes that were peeking up at you from between your legs, and the overwhelming feeling of his mouth lapping up your juices with fervor. 

“I-I think… ah! Fuck!” Your shoulders lurch forward on their own, your walls starting to tighten sporadically around Law’s thick fingers. 

“You’re so close, pretty girl… just a little more… squeeze those tits for me, yah?” Law asks before returning his mouth to your throbbing nub. 

You do as you’re told and you wrap your manicured hands around your own breasts. You pull desperately at your nipples and cry out from the intense pleasure. 

“Law!” You moan your captain’s name as tears prick the corners of your eyes from the sensation. 

“Cum.” Law growls.

With a strangled scream, everything in your body released and your breath caught in your throat. Euphoric waves pulsed from your sex outwards and you felt the tears fall freely from your lash line as your legs shook. Your scream turned into a moan, and then fell into a whine as you suddenly felt too sensitive to have Law’s touch on you and you squirmed away. 

You caught your breath after what could have been 30 seconds or 5 minutes and take a look between your legs. Law stared up at you, face and bangs soaked in some sort of liquid… your liquid… and a stupid grin plastered across his face. 

“Holy fuck, I’m sorry I-“ You stutter out through heaving breaths. 

“Don’t.” Law stops you. “Don’t apologize. That was so fucking hot. Didn’t peg you for a squirter. Nice.” He rubs his hands on your thighs as he stands up. Your face flushes impossibly redder. “How do you feel?” Law asks. 

“I…” You flop your head back onto Law’s bed. “I feel like I got hit by a sea train but also incredibly light? My legs feel like pudding.” You sit back up on your elbows. “Law… captain… That was amazing…” You smile up at him. 

“Good.” Law looks down at the mess you’ve made between your legs and on his comforter. He looks down at his chest and sees even more remnants of your release. 

“How about we get cleaned up before bed and I can show you a few more things, yah? You’re staying with me tonight.” Law offers you a hand and you stand up on shaky legs to follow him to the bathroom. 

“Hmmm maybe this time it can be your turn?” You glance down at Law’s obvious bulge straining against his spotted jeans. “I owe you one, right?” You smirk. 

— —

>:)

[moonstruckme]

also i LOVE your poly!marauders apocalypse au (so creative btw!! i'm obsessed!!) and would be so down to read something in that universe where the reader gets hypothermia or something like that hehe !!!! <333333

Thanks for requesting lovely!

cw: mild hypothermia

apocalypse poly!marauders x fem!reader ♡ 1.2k words

You keep tripping, which is mildly embarrassing. You think it’s a combination of fatigue and the general numbness that’s pervaded your body even through the layers you’d put on when you’d packed up the campsite that morning. You’d all agreed that, with the death eaters on your trail, it’s really only safe to stay in one area for a few days at a time, even with all the protections you place around your sites. But that means days where, instead of lounging around your tent, listening to the radio and plotting for the Order, you use all the daylight you have to hike through the wintry woods until you’re far enough away to set up another camp. 

Sirius glances back when you stumble again, the toe of your boot catching on a branch you hadn’t seen buried in the snow. It’s a more dramatic affair than it should be, and you barely get your other foot out in front of you fast enough to avoid face-planting into the leaf litter. 

Your shivering worsens as another gust of wind burns your face, making your thick jacket feel like mesh. You think this has to be the worst moving day your group has had yet. The cold is the same, but the sun hasn’t so much as peeked from behind the clouds all day and the wind makes it nearly unbearable. The snow is thick enough that you’ve started stepping in the boys’ footprints to save energy. One of the many perks of taking up the rear. 

You nearly hit Sirius when he stops in front of you. 

“This clearing looks about as good as any,” James is saying, but Remus looks hesitant. 

“I don’t know,” he frets. “Do you think it’s far enough? We’ve been slow today.” 

“You’re tired,” James says kindly. You look at Remus, noting his slouched posture, the weariness he’s never quite learned to hide from his expression. You’re not sure how you didn’t notice his exhaustion before. You’re usually more aware of those things. “And it’s horrid out here. Let’s just call it a night, and if you’re still anxious about it tomorrow we’ll go a bit further.” 

“I can make it further tonight.” 

“It’s not all about you, Moony,” Sirius drawls. He looks especially monochrome against all the fresh white snow, you think. His superblack hair is as eye-catching as neon. “I’ve got a rock in my shoe I’d love to get out, and I know y/n’s knees have to be black and blue from the way she’s been falling for the past hour.” 

His scheme works; Remus looks to you, arguments of his own fortitude forgotten. “Are you tired, dove? You want to stop?” 

You shrug. “Yeah, I guess. It’s cold.” 

Suddenly all three boys seem focussed intently on you. You’re not sure why. You don’t actually recall much of what you’d been talking about. 

“Could you say that again?” James asks you. His brows are stitched together and his eyes have gone all sharp behind his glasses. 

“I just said it’s cold.” 

“Why’re you talking like that, doll?” Sirius takes a step toward you, then looks to Remus. “Why is she slurring?” 

“I don’t know,” Remus says softly. He’s looking at you weird, too. Frowny. “Yeah, let’s set up. Maybe she just needs a rest.” 

James spells the tent up quickly, then makes Remus stay and sit with you while he and Sirius set up the protections and everything else. The temperature inside the magical tent is cozy. Remus lights a fire in the grate to warm you all up. 

“Do you feel okay, lovely?” he asks, helping you out of your jacket. You sit on the bed, working off your shoes. 

“Yeah, just…just really tired.” 

He furrows his eyebrows, placing a palm on your cheek. You have no clue how it’s so warm, but a sigh escapes you as you lean into the touch. 

“When did you start tripping?” he asks you. 

You…you’re not sure. You can’t remember the first time it happened. How long had you been walking?

Your bemusement must show on your face, because Remus’ mouth pinches. His hand slides down to cup your face, fingers pressing oddly into your jaw. Frankly, you could care less where he puts them so long as he keeps touching you.

“Feeling better?” James asks, materializing behind Remus. You’re not sure which one of you he’s talking to, but you hum contentedly anyway. 

“I think she might be hypothermic,” Remus doesn’t look away from you as he talks, his eyebrows lowered like he’s waiting for you to answer a question you don’t remember him asking. His fingers press harder into your neck. “Her pulse is…scary weak.” 

James looks at you, and you look at Remus. 

“You really think so?” you ask him, befuddled. “I don’t feel…I’m only tired.” 

“Hypothermia makes you tired,” he tells you gently. “And you’re slurring your words, love.” 

You feel an icy tendril of fear snake around your spine. “I am?” 

“You’re alright.” James catches onto your panic quickly, leaning over Remus to give your shoulders a bolstering squeeze. “Let’s just get some of these layers off you, and then we’ll swaddle you in blankets.” He starts easing off your jumper, leaving you in just your undershirt. You’re newly cognizant of the sluggishness of your movements as you raise your arms to help him. “Once you sit by the fire for a bit, you’ll be feeling back to normal in no time.” 

You nod numbly, lifting your bum to tug off the jeans you’d worn over leggings. James takes the blanket from the bed and wraps it around you while Remus goes to find more in the other room. 

“Poor love,” James coos, dropping a kiss to your head. “You’re shaking like a leaf.” 

“No duh,” Sirius says, the tent flap letting in a blast of cool air behind him. “It’s fucking freezing out.” 

James offers him a sorry smile. “We think she’s got hypothermia.” 

Sirius sobers, stormcloud eyes flickering to you. “Shit, really? How bad is that?” 

“Not too bad, I don’t think,” Remus says, nudging past him with a stack of blankets in his arms. “I mean, it’d be great if I’d thought to bring any books on that sort of thing, but I’m fairly sure if it were bad she’d be more confused and a bit…blueish.” He drapes a blanket over your shoulders, letting James pull it tighter and tuck it about as he wishes. “Do you feel any better?” 

“I think so,” you say quietly. It’s a bit unnerving to be at the center of so much alarm like this. You do feel better being out of the cold, but you’re not sure if that’s what he’s asking. “It’s a little hard to tell.” 

“You don’t seem like you’re slurring as badly,” James evaluates. He cups the back of your neck, planting a kiss on the frozen tip of your nose. “I think you’re getting better already, lovie.” 

Your face certainly feels warmer. 

Sirius grins at your flustering, though it’s dampened by worry. “What about a hot chocolate?” he asks, tone unusually gentle. “Does that sound like it might help?” 

“I’m fine,” you say, and he disregards you immediately, posing the same question to Remus. 

“Would that help?”

Remus shrugs. “It could. Doubt it would hurt. James, love, I think she’s got enough blankets.” 

James frowns, peering through the layers of covering to find your face. “Do you feel warm enough, angel?” 

You blink, owlish. “I think so?” 

He shakes his head. “Sounds far from certain. More blankets it is. Sirius, get started on the hot chocolate.” 

[shitsndgiggs]

Hi Kaya! So yesterday night I got drunk for the first time, I was wondering maybe if you could do a hector fort one. Where he’s with his friends while she’s at her friends house having a little girls night with her friends and she’s just completely out of it but her friends have taken care of her but she just wants hector and she’s just all knocked out and stumbling everywhere and stuff. And he comes too pick her up after a face time call with her and her friends. And he’s so amused and concerned at the same time cause he’s never seen her like that. Love your fics so much!❤️I have the worst headache😭😭😭

A/N: Ooooh, getting drunk for the first time?! I hope it lived up to all your wild expectations. Nothing unexpected happened, right? If so, SPILL THE TEA🥳

DRUNK DIAL - HÉCTOR FORT

Héctor picking you up from a girls night

Héctor Fort x fem! reader

︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿

Laughter filled the living room as the night carried on, the scent of pizza and popcorn lingering in the air.

My friends and I had been planning this girls' night for weeks, and it had turned out to be just as fun—and chaotic—as we’d imagined.

Drinks flowed freely, and soon enough, I found myself far more than just tipsy.

“Y/N, how many have you had?” one of my friends, Mia, giggled, watching me attempt to sit down but completely miss the couch and flop onto the floor instead.

I laughed hysterically, though my coordination was shot, and I was barely able to stay sitting upright. “I dunno,” I slurred, waving her off. “I’m fine! Totally… fine.”

Mia and the others exchanged amused glances, but I could see the concern creep in. They knew me well enough to know I rarely drank this much, but tonight had been one of those nights where I just let go.

Except now, I was paying for it by stumbling around, completely out of it.

“Y/N, are you sure you’re good?” My other friend, Lily, asked, kneeling down to try and help me up. “You look like you’re ready to pass out.”

“I’m not passing out!” I insisted, although my words were slurring beyond recognition. “But… I want Hector.”

They laughed softly, but it was clear I was no longer in any state to take care of myself. As much as they loved me, they weren’t about to let me destroy their apartment in my drunken stupor.

“She’s never been this drunk before,” Mia said, shaking her head with a mix of amusement and worry. “We should call Hector. She’s not going to calm down until she sees him.”

“I’ll FaceTime him,” Lily said, grabbing my phone from the coffee table. “Hopefully, he’s not too busy.”

As I flopped back onto the couch, I heard the familiar ringing of FaceTime, and then suddenly, Hector’s face appeared on the screen.

I could barely focus on it, but just hearing his voice made me smile.

“Hey, man!” Lily greeted him, trying to sound casual but clearly looking for help. “Um, we’re having a little bit of a situation here…”

Hector, who was out with his friends, looked confused at first but quickly concerned when he noticed the background noise and then saw me stumbling around behind her. “Is Y/N okay? What happened?”

Mia leaned over, showing me slumped on the couch, giggling at something none of them understood. “Yeah, she’s just… really, really drunk. We tried to take care of her, but she keeps asking for you.”

Hector blinked, his concern deepening, though a small smile tugged at his lips. “She’s that bad, huh? I’ve never seen her like this.”

“Neither have we,” Lily said, shaking her head. “She’s out of it, man. Do you think you can come pick her up?”

Hector laughed softly, though his voice was still filled with worry. “Yeah, I’ll be there soon. I just need to wrap up here with the guys. Keep her safe until I get there, okay?”

“Of course,” Mia said, waving off his concern. “She’s not going anywhere. We’re just… trying to keep her from knocking over any more lamps.”

I barely registered what was going on, my head fuzzy and thoughts jumbled, but the sound of Hector’s voice brought a small comfort.

I tried reaching for the phone, slurring, “Hector… where are you? Come get me!”

“I’m on my way, baby,” he said gently, his voice calming even through the screen. “Just sit tight.”

Twenty minutes later, I was still sitting in the same spot, though my friends had managed to get some water into me. Just as I was about to attempt to stand up again, there was a knock on the door.

“He’s here,” Lily said, jumping up to answer it.

Hector stepped inside, and the second I saw him, I felt a wave of relief wash over me. Even in my drunken haze, just his presence made everything feel a little less chaotic.

He was dressed casually, jeans and a hoodie, but the look of concern on his face was unmistakable.

“Oh my god, you actually came!” I exclaimed, stumbling toward him. “You’re my hero.”

Hector chuckled, catching me before I tripped and faceplanted into his chest. “Whoa, easy there,” he said softly, wrapping his arms around me to steady me. “You’re a mess.”

I looked up at him, blinking slowly as if trying to process his words. “I’m fine. Just… maybe a little too much wine.”

“Maybe?” Hector raised an eyebrow, amused, but he was still clearly concerned as he helped me sit back down on the couch.

“I’ve never seen her like this,” Mia admitted, giving Hector an apologetic look. “We didn’t know she’d drink this much.”

“It’s okay,” Hector assured them, sitting beside me as I clung to his arm. “I’ve got her from here.”

My friends gave him grateful smiles, and I slurred something about being perfectly capable of standing up on my own—right before I nearly fell off the couch again.

Hector chuckled, catching me before I could fall. “Alright, alright, I think it’s time to get you home,” he said softly, brushing a strand of hair out of my face. “You’ve had a long night.”

“Only if you carry me,” I teased, though my voice was far too slurred to sound coherent.

Hector sighed but with a fond smile. “Of course. Let’s get you home.”

With that, he scooped me up into his arms, and I leaned my head against his chest, feeling more comfortable than I had all night.

Even through the drunken haze, I felt safe with him, like everything was going to be okay now that he was here.

As he carried me to the car, my friends waved him off with thanks and promises to check in tomorrow.

Hector placed me gently in the passenger seat, buckling me in as I blinked up at him with a sleepy smile.

“You’re the best, you know that?” I murmured, my head lolling back against the seat.

“I know,” Hector replied, smiling softly as he brushed a kiss to my forehead. “But you’re going to hate me tomorrow when you have the worst headache.”

“I don’t care,” I mumbled, half-asleep already. “Just… don’t leave me.”

“I’m not going anywhere,” he said gently, brushing a hand over my hair. “Let’s get you home.”

And with that, Hector drove us back, his hand never leaving mine, even as I drifted off to sleep, the comfort of him being near making everything feel a little less blurry.

[marvelous-slut]

Rekindle - Opie Winston x Reader

Y’all I’ve underestimated just how sexy Opie is. Like, stop for a minute and look at him. I’ve literally had this in my draft forever and I’m glad to finally get her out.

Warnings: MINORS, as always DNI! 18+ ONLY! Smut head folks.

_________

You turn the engine to your car off as you finally made it to the familiar garage. Teller Morrow. It had been at least 10 years since you’d gotten out of Charming and never looked back, even sitting in the garage brought back too many memories for your brain to count. Most were horrible memories, your father Otto being arrested right outside the club house/garage. Your mother coming in late into the night, drunken and loud. Knocking over things she didn’t need but wouldn’t throw away. If she didn’t come home, you knew she was right inside the club house sobbing for your father who was constantly in and out of prison. The more you thought about the horrible memories, the more pissed off you felt yourself becoming. You decided it was time to go in and face the members of SAMCRO, find out exactly what had happened to your mother. A part of you figured she’d gotten killed due to something with the club, or maybe one of her porn costars had beaten her to death. Whatever it was, you couldn’t allow yourself to feel one hundred percent sad about it. Your parents were never really parents, who could be when they were so invested in the club life?

You walk in to the club house, not much has changed since 10 years ago. The same smell of pussy and booze, the same mug shots hanging on the wall with the exception of a few who you assumed to be members. One struck you, taking it in as you looked at the familiar face. Harry Winston.

“Jesus Christ Ope.” You say softly, before you have any time to think about what he did or if he was still in, a voice brings you out of your thoughts.

“Well look at who’s here!” Piney, it was so good to see him. Even if he looked sick with the oxygen tubing sticking out of his nose. You walk over to him, opening your arms for his warm embrace. “How you doin’ kid?” He asks, smiling largely.

“I’m good Piney, how’d you end up with that shit hanging from your nose?” He chuckles deeply, letting out a cough once he’s done.

“Lung issues, too many Marlboros I guess.” You laugh and he pats you on the back, before you can ask any questions about Opie you get your answer. He stands outside the door of the chapel, leaning up against it and seeming like he’d rather be anywhere but here. Seeing you wasn’t something he was looking forward to like the rest of the club.

“Well, glad to see you made it out for someone’s funeral.” He speaks coldly before walking out of the club house completely. Piney can see the discomfort on your face and speaks up.

“Ignore him, he’s been a real prick since Donna died.” Donna, it had been two years since she passed. He was still mad about that? You sigh and shake your head. You didn’t attend Donnas funeral and maybe you should have, maybe you should have been there to support Opie. He’d called you after it happened, drunken and slurring almost every word that come out of his mouth. You felt it was disrespectful to Donna to come to her funeral and comfort her husband, who you dated for years and considered your first love. It didn’t feel right no matter what way you thought about it, so you didn’t come. That was the last time you’d heard from him until today.

“I guess death can do that to a person. I’ll see you later Piney, I have to go get started looking for a dress to bury mom in.” He hugs you once more, this time a little more tight than before.

“He still cares about you kid. He loved Donna, but he loved you too.” He whispers, making you go cold. You break the hug and smile at him softly, heading out the club house doors as fast as you could. Hoping Piney didn’t notice the grief written all over your face.

__________

You had been through many challenges before, but trying to find your mother an outfit for her funeral that wasn’t completely revealing may be something you weren’t able to do. She’d turned the house into an even bigger dump than it was before you left, ashtrays filled to the brim with butts, beer cans and bottles scattered everywhere. Clothes thrown to the side, on the tv, in the floor. It was a wreck. You prayed it wouldn’t be yours to deal with now. You move a pile of books on the bed to the side to lay out what clothing looked appropriate to bury someone in when a stack of photos falls out. You pick them up, looking at each one. A photo of you and Otto on his Harley, you were maybe 6 years old in the photo. It made you smile, even if there was a lot of shit memories connected to your father you did know he loved you. You knew it was shitty not to call or even visit him, if they’d even let you. You look to the next picture, feeling like someone had just hit you in the chest. A photo of you and Opie on your senior prom night.

“God, my hair. My face.” You say softly, laughing at how much different you looked. Your eyes roam over to Opie, he was much smaller than he is now. Hardly any hair on the poor boys face compared to now. You sigh, folding the picture and sticking it in your pocket. Maybe you’d get to show it to him, if he lets go of the issue of Donnas funeral before you leave. The knock at the door takes you away from reminiscing. You’re in shock at who stands behind the white, dirt covered door.

“I wanted to say I’m sorry for earlier. I guess I’m bad at letting shit go.” Opie says, he leans against the frame of the door, before you can suggest for him not to do it. “Can I come in?” You move out of the door way, noticing him looking around the disaster of a house.

“It’s a fuckin’ dump. Luann couldn’t keep a house up worth a shit apparently.” You say, he laughs a little bit. “There’s no way I’m staying here. Guess I’ll get a hotel till I go home.” You say, moving around some clutter, scared to sit on the couch even after it’s gone.

“If you need a place to crash, I’m sure the club wouldn’t mind if you stayed at the house. My house is pretty empty too, wife being dead and all.” You weren’t sure how to react to the last comment, so you didn’t acknowledge it.

“Thanks Ope. I found this going through moms stuff.” You hand him the photo, as soon as he looks at it he laughs. You feel your chest tighten when he does, even after all the years apart he still had an affect on you.

“Jesus, look how fuckin’ scrawny.” He says, you remember the first time he’d ever put his kutte on, how it was so baggy on him. He’d definitely grew into it over the years. “You were pretty, still are.” He says, you can’t help but smile at the comment.

“Don’t kiss my ass just cause you were being a shit head.” He grins, knowing you were half right. He felt awful for being so cold toward you, especially this being the chance to let you know that he’s never forgotten you. How you’d haunted him nearly everyday for the last 10 years.

“Listen, I gotta get going. Got some shit with the club that needs handled. If you need to crash at my place, you know where I am.”

“Thanks Ope. I really appreciate it. I’ll see you later?” He nods his head and closes the door behind him. You place your back to the door, hanging your head down. It shouldn’t be this way, the high school sweet heart still having some stupid affect on your mind years later. You look up, opening your eyes to a large rat sitting in front of you.

“Jesus fucking Christ!” You scream, grabbing the dress you’d found for your mother and slamming the door behind you.

__________

The porch light is barley shining when you step up to the door. You knock on the door, not having to wait long before it’s answered. Opie stands in the door way, only in a towel. Hair still wet from showering. You feel your eyes widen, looking him up and down. You knew it was obvious even if you had been praying it wasn’t.

“Sorry, didn’t think you’d stop by.” He says, moving out of the door way. You step in, the place was much different than your mothers. Clean, neat, no reason to be scared of being on the couch.

“So you just answer the door for anyone half naked?”

“Just the pretty ones.” You feel your face heat up at the comment. Embarrassed that you’re blushing like this. You place a hand on his thigh, rubbing it gently.

“Ope, I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you.” You say softly, he brings your head up to face him. Looking into his eyes makes your heart go faster than it had in years. He places his hand on the side of your cheek, caressing it gently.

“It’s okay.” Before you can respond, you feel yourself move closer, kissing him. He moves his hands to your hips as you stratal him, gripping them tightly. You run your fingers through his damp hair, the last time this had happened was when the two of you were 19 years old, what you’d thought would be the last time you ever got to be this close to him. You break the kiss and head down to the towel that covered him, uncovering his hardened cock. Turns out, everything about him had grown some in ten years. You lower your head down, running your tongue up his cock as he moans out. One thing you love about Opie, he never was afraid to be loud. He’d let you know how good you made him feel. You wrap your lips around his cock, moving your head up and down. Slowly, trying to get him going and eager for you. It worked very fast, he grabs a fist full of your hair, tugging it gently trying to get you to pick up the pace. It was hard to take him in your mouth without choking, you hadn’t been blessed with no gag reflex like most. Taking him little by little however, was driving him insane.

“Too big for you to handle now?” He asks, you can just in-vision the smirk plastered across his face. You decide to take it as a challenge, taking him until he hits the back of your throat. You hold in your gags, but the tears forming in your eyes can’t hide that you’re struggling with taking every inch of him.

“Fuck.” He mutters out, leaning his head up to watch the sight in-front of him. A sight that as much as he was ashamed to admit, thought about from time to time even while he was married to Donna. You pull your mouth off of him, slowly, letting him feel every movement as you do. He groans out, as you straighten yourself up, he’s pulling at the waistband of your shorts. Silently, he begs you to take them off. You begin to unbutton them and he helps get your underwear and shorts off swiftly. Eager to be inside of you. You reach your hands down to discard your shirt before you slide yourself down onto him. Your walls stretching with every inch you take of him. Moaning out, you rest your hands on his chest. He places his hands back onto your hips, helping you move and watches your face as you adjust to him.

“Oh my God. Ope.” You whimper out, moving yourself faster and more steady onto him. A hand finds its way to your breast, grasping it firmly. He moves his hand farther up to your mouth, he drags his thumb over your lips slowly. You open your mouth far enough for him to graze it over your teeth. Before you know it, you’re flipped onto your back. The feeling of him reinserting himself makes you whine out, arching your back as he picks up a steady pace. You turn your head, closing your eyes and taking in the feeling of pleasure that’s overwhelming your senses. He uses one of his hands to turn your head back to him, holding it there.

“I want you to look me in the eyes. I want to see how good I make you feel.” The words make you even wetter than you were, which at this point you’d thought was impossible. He feels your nails digging into his back, using your hands to pull him closer to you. Looking at your face and the way you tightly had your legs wrapped around him, he knew you were close to cumming. He speeds up, thrusting into you faster and a touch harder than before.

“Fuck! Ope-“ You’re unable to get another word out before you feel yourself tighten around him. You grab him, pulling him down and smashing your lips against his. You grind against him, making sure to ride the orgasm as long as possible. Feeling you grind against him sends him over the edge, he groans out as he releases into you. You would thank God later for the birth control pills, but right now that was the last thing on your mind. He pulls himself out of you, laying down beside you as you both try to catch your breaths. You try to make the shaking in your legs stop, but it’s useless. You decide to just lay there until you don’t feel shaky or hazy.

“So much for small talk huh?” You ask, he chuckles and stretches out his arm for you to come over. You do so, resting your head on his chest. The feeling feels so good, so familiar and you hate to think about it ending. Suddenly dreading going back home.

“Yeah. Maybe we can do that in the morning.” He says, kissing the top of your head.

[padfootagain]

Love in Verses (XVIII)

Chapter 18 : ‘What the devil do I care what I know, and what I say?’

Hi! Here is new chapter! This is a very important chapter… I hope you like it!!!

I hope you like this chapter! Tell me what you think!

****

Pairing: Hozier x fem!reader (professor!AU)

Warnings: slow burn, angst, hurt, hurt/comfort, tooth-rotting fluff in later chapters, some scenes in later chapters will have heavy sexual themes even if it’s not explicit nsfw description, so minors here

Summary: Your life seems perfect. You're engaged, your career is thriving as you become an assistant professor at Trinity College, and this Andrew Hozier-Byrne you're sharing an office with seems to be a nice guy you hope to call a friend soon. Life seems to be smiling at you... until everything goes sour. When your fiancé breaks up with you, your perfect world shatters. And when your colleague also gets his heart broken soon after, your shared office seems to be a curse rather than a blessing. But Andrew seems determined to mend your broken hearts... Will things finally go according to plan?

Word Count: 3472

Masterlist for the series �� Hozier’s masterlist – Main masterlist

Wisdom

This I say, and this I know: Love has seen the last of me. Love's a trodden lane to woe, Love's a path to misery.

This I know, and knew before, This I tell you, of my years: Hide your heart, and lock your door. Hell's afloat in lovers' tears.

Give your heart, and toss and moan; What a pretty fool you look! I am sage, who sit alone; Here's my wool, and here's my book.

Look! A lad's a-waiting there, Tall he is and bold, and gay. What the devil do I care What I know, and what I say?

Dorothy Parker

Classes for the first semester were over. The Christmas Holiday season had come to a close as well, leaving you buried under piles of articles and documents and books to help you get ready for the new classes that would start after the end of the exams.

It was snowing outside, a part of the Liffey had frozen during the night, apparently. Some idiot had tried walking on it, had fallen into the river, you had heard it on the news. He was equipped for a swim in cold waters, but still… how silly people could be…

You were in bed, you checked the time on the alarm clock on your bedside table. Almost midnight. You heaved a sigh. You ought to stop, catch a few hours of sleep before heading to work tomorrow. But you had a thousand things to do and to plan and… God, so many things still…

You were distracted by the vibration of your phone on the bed, looked for it in a hurry under the covers. You frowned as you read Frank’s name on your screen, picked up with a worried frown on your brow. Something ought to be wrong…

“Hello?”

“Y/N?”

You recognised the sound of his voice. He was drunk and had been crying. When the two of you were together, he was only in this state when you had a huge fight.

“You’re alright?” you asked him, knowing the answer.

“No, I’m not… God, I’m really not, Y/N. Can you… can you pick me up? I’m drunk, I can’t drive, I don’t know where to go… Christ, I’ve fucked up so bad tonight… please, help me…”

You looked at all the work you had left to do, looked at the time again, but heaved a sigh. Not accepting to help wasn’t even a possibility…

“I’ll come and pick you up. Where are you right now?” you asked him, and you heard the sigh of relief he heaved at your words.

“I’m downtown. At a pub… hang on, I’ll give you the address…”

“What happened? Where’s Samantha?”

He sniffed.

“We had a row.”

You nodded, not surprised.

“Like… a huge one. Our first row. I… I’ve fucked up. She’s home. I can’t go home, I don’t know where to go…”

“You can stay at my place for tonight,” you offered. “It’s alright, I’m on my way.”

“Thank you so much, Y/N… thank you,” he mumbled, the lilt of his accent more pronounced as his words were slurred by alcohol.

“Don’t mention it. I’m leaving now, stay where you are.”

You hurried out of bed, put on some clothes, grabbed your keys. You typed a text while you were in the lift.

Hi, Andy!

Just a warning: Sam and Frank had a row tonight, seems quite bad. Omw to get Frank from some bar downtown. He’ll stay at my place for tonight. Sam might call you too.

You were walking to your car when he answered.

Thanks for the warning. Sam has just texted me, I’ll go to hers.

Good luck with Frank.

You sat behind the wheel, locked your car before answering.

Good luck with Sam too!

You were about to put your phone away in your purse when it vibrated again.

Tell me when you’re home, okay? It’s late.

A tender smile softened your features.

Will do xx

You put your phone away, started driving. It took you a while to find the pub, but Frank was eager to leave, and you were relieved not to have to fight him for his car keys or something like that. Instead, he obediently entered your car. His eyes were red and puffy, he stunk of whiskey, cheap beer, and cigarettes.

“Thanks,” he mumbled, voice made deeper by the liquor, words slurred.

“No problem. Let’s go to my place.”

He nodded in silence, dried his eyes.

“What happened?” you asked as you drove, the streets empty at this hour, the lampposts the only sources of light in the sleeping city as clouds heavy with rain were hiding the moon and stars.

“Sam and I had a fight.”

You hummed.

“What was it about?”

“Something stupid. Fucking stupid.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, like… something about the wedding. About the guests we should put together, and I was like… like who cares? People can just… sit… wherever they like. But she was making plans, and I took the piss, and she got… so fucking mad and…”

He sniffed, looked by the window at the empty streets.

“Was fucking stupid.”

“You got angry?”

“Yeah.”

“And you said something stupid?”

“Yeah. How do you know?”

“You generally say stupid and hurtful things when you’re really angry.”

“I don’t mean them.”

“I know. It still hurts.”

He heaved a sigh, rested his forehead against the windowpane.

“I think it was a long-time coming though. We’ve been bickering a lot. I don’t know… it’s just been a lot of stress these past few weeks. I thought it would be better after the New Year’s Eve party, but it wasn’t.”

You slowly nodded.

“I mean… you’ve been moving very fast through this relationship. Maybe you’ve skipped a few steps along the way, and you’re feeling it now.”

He remained quiet for the rest of the drive. When you reached your apartment building, he stared at you, but said nothing.

You helped him through the elevator and hallways all the way to your flat. You texted Andrew that you were safely home while Frank was struggling with his shoes.

Andrew answered in seconds with a thumbs up.

“You think I’m making a mistake, don’t you?”

Frank’s voice brought you back to your apartment, made you put your phone away and turn to him instead.

You weren’t quite sure what to answer, even if this was the perfect moment to speak your mind. You were too taken aback for that.

“Everybody does,” Frank nodded. “Everybody thinks I’ve lost my mind. Maybe I have… I don’t know anymore… Maybe… Maybe I’ve made a mistake, and I shouldn’t have left and… I don’t know… I don’t know…”

“I think you’re moving very fast. I think all this is going too fast,” you spoke with a gentle voice, moving closer to him. “I mean… you pushed back the engagement, then the wedding, when we were together. While this is so sudden… Everything about you and Sam seems sudden.”

Slowly, Frank nodded.

“I don’t know… I don’t know what to do, I… I want it to be fast though, I don’t want to think things through this time around. I don’t want to be cautious, the way we were, you and I, Y/N. I just… I want to live this fully.”

He rubbed at his tired eyes.

“I’m sorry, I don’t make any sense right now…”

“You should go to bed,” you gave him a sad smile, but he didn’t notice, he was too tired for that, or… you didn’t know why… but he didn’t notice.

You gave him a pillow and a blanket so he could settle on the couch, he thanked you, closed his eyes.

Before you could move away, he grabbed your hand in his, gave it a tight squeeze. You wanted to cry now.

And then, he surrendered to sleep, and he let go.

Sam wasn’t crying anymore when Andrew arrived to her flat, but her eyes were red and puffy with tears that had already fallen. She let him inside, offered him something to drink while he took off his coat, gloves, beanie and scarf, but he declined. He turned to her with a tender smile, something full of compassion.

“You’re okay? How are you feeling?” he asked with a voice he made deeper than usual, knowing it calmed her down.

“Not great,” she admitted.

“You had a fight with Frank, then?”

“Yeah… we… I… It was pretty bad.”

“Bad?”

“It was a big row.”

“Was he mean to you?” Andrew’s voice shook, a frown digging a line between his eyebrows. “Did he threaten you?”

“What? No! Of course not! We just had a row.”

He visibly relaxed, took a step closer to her. They were standing in her living room, the night was quiet. He wanted to reach out, but he didn’t dare.

“What was it about? Do you want to talk about it?”

She shrugged, but took a step closer to him too, standing close, so close… He could have pulled her into an embrace so easily…

“We fought about the wedding. We… we don’t want the same thing.”

“About what?”

“Silly things. Unimportant details, to be honest. But I didn’t know how to react to it… like… I know you sigh a lot when you’re annoyed. I know your voice quietens first, and then you raise it. I know you get petty when you’re really angry. I know you need to spend time alone to cool down. I know you’ll want to have the last word no matter whether you’re right or wrong, but you’ll never admit it. I know that it’s useless to simply bury the hatchet, that you’ll bring it up again later if we don’t discuss it when the issue arises. I know you don’t talk about what you feel, that I should not be offended if you just lock yourself up in your office until you’re calmer and we can talk about it. I know it’s useless to make you acknowledge your feelings. I know you’re so fucking stubborn when you really want to be. I know… I know how to deal with you, even with your anger, even with the ugliest of your feelings. Cause I… I know you. But I didn’t know how to handle him. I got mad, and he got mad and I didn’t know what to do. And I made things worse. I don’t know what to do…”

She looked up at him with this specific gaze, and he knew what she needed. He knew it, because he knew her. And she had just told him what he was already painfully aware of, that she knew him like the back of her hand. And perhaps this was the part he missed the most now that he was alone. That he used to have someone who knew him so completely.

He wrapped his arms around her, because he knew she needed a hug. She needed to feel safe and warm, and indeed she rested her head on his shoulder easily.

He held her close, the way he had thousands of times before. He always found solace in it, something soothing, anchoring. When she rose to her tiptoes to kiss his cheek, to thank him in a whisper for coming, his chest grew a little warm but he was surprised when his heart didn’t stumble. It didn’t rush, didn’t miss a few beats. It remained steady, although it was content. And the arms that used to soothe him were a nice embrace, a gentle shelter to rest, but they lacked something. Something… he wasn’t sure what it was. He knew that he didn’t feel the way he used to when they held on each other before. He knew he felt less than before.

They remained motionless, bathed in silence for a few minutes, the sound of their breathing the only sign of life in the room. His mind wandered off, instead of being anchored in the moment, unlike the way she used to force his brain to quieten down. Instead, he thought about the classes he had to prepare for the rest of the year, the exams coming up, he thought of Frank and was angry at him for hurting Sam, and he thought of you. He was suddenly worried about you, he hadn’t received any text from you yet, to tell him you were home. Were you alright? It was so late into the night and you were driving to a pub downtown, after all…

He felt his phone buzzing in the back pocket of his jeans, pulled away from the hug. He didn’t notice Sam’s puzzled expression.

“Andy?” she looked up at him with a questioning look.

He didn’t notice she was speaking. He heaved a relieved sigh instead.

I’m home. All good xx

He answered with a mere thumbs up.

“Andy?”

This time he looked up from his phone, put the device in his back pocket again.

“Yeah?”

“You’re okay?”

But he knew her. He knew her better than anyone else in this world. He knew this question meant ‘who is texting you at such an hour?’.

“Yeah… erm… It was Y/N. Frank called her to pick him up at a pub.”

“Did he?” she asked, clearly jealous.

Andrew hummed and nodded.

“He’ll stay at her place for the night.”

“Right…”

She seemed uneasy now. Worried.

“And why was she telling you this anyway?”

“Because you asked me to come here too,” he merely answered.

“So, she picked him up?”

“Yeah, they’re at her apartment.”

“Why is she telling you all this?”

“It’s late. I asked her to tell me when she’d be home, just to make sure she was safe.”

She stared at Andrew with an unreadable expression, one he didn’t know how to analyse, despite how well he knew her. Was it a new one? Did he simply… fail at reading her this time?

“Can you stay tonight?”

The question came out of the blue, took him aback.

Stay the night…

“I… don’t want to be alone,” she whispered.

And Andrew wasn’t sure what she meant. Probably for him to sleep on the sofa, but there was something in her eyes… No, she didn’t mean for him to sleep on the sofa…

It was his chance to get her back, and he knew it. He knew it. He could have her back, maybe, he could try, at least…

He thought about kissing her then, closing the distance between them, finding back what they had lost. But instead, he…

Instead, he thought of your lips on his, of your weight in his arms, of your kiss on his cheek while a new year was born.

He wanted to kiss you. He didn’t want to kiss Sam at all…

He didn’t want Frank to be with you now, in your apartment. He didn’t want you to kiss him, he didn’t want you to be with him, and God almighty, he could feel his heart racing at the thought that you could have sex with him…

Slowly, he shook his head.

“I don’t think it would be a good idea,” he mumbled, his voice not sounding like his own.

“But I…”

“I’m sorry… I… I should go. I should go…”

He hurried to her front door, while Sam remained standing in her living room, too stunned by Andrew’s actions to move or say anything. Before she could go back to her senses, Andrew had left.

He had left. When he sat down behind the wheel, he didn’t know what was happening, couldn’t understand his own actions. He could have tried to get Sam back, and instead… instead he had thought of you, he had… he had wished it was you who stood there before him, offering him a chance to kiss you…

Fucking hell… he bloody liked you. He liked you. He liked you enough to push Sam away…

Holy shit…

Andrew was pacing before a tired Alex, who was sitting on his sofa.

Andrew was lucky his best friend was a night owl like him, but even if he naturally longed to go to bed at an unreasonable hour, Alex was still longing to bury himself under his warmest blanket and finally go to sleep now that it was almost four in the morning.

But Andrew was still pacing. He had called Alex after leaving Sam’s flat, panicked, talking too fast about ‘catching feelings’ and ‘being a fucking eejit’ and ‘ruining everything’. Alex invited him to come over, and now Andrew was burning holes in his carpet…

“This is so bad, Alex. So fucking bad…”

“Calm down, it’s alright. You have a crush on Y/N, so what?”

“SO WHAT?! SO WHAT?! I don’t want to have a crush on Y/N! I want to have Sam back!”

“Not anymore, apparently.”

Andrew threw his hands up in the air in frustration. He had a thousand things to say and couldn’t speak them out loud, he just couldn’t. He was never good at this, opening up about his feelings… He buried them instead, and let them gnaw at his heart. Was it healthy? No, but he couldn’t help it. And then he wrote about it, and he felt better, lighter, and things were alright again.

But right now, he was too much in a state to grab some paper and pen and put it all down.

“This can’t be happening, Alex” he shook his head. “I can’t be catching feelings on Y/N.”

“Why not? She sounds like an amazing woman!”

“She is! Don’t get me wrong, she’s… incredible! But I want Sam.”

“You don’t anymore.”

“Of course, I bloody do!”

“Why did you push her away tonight, then?”

But Andrew wasn’t ready to admit that.

“I don’t know… I don’t know…”

“You’re falling for Y/N.”

“She’s my colleague! We share an office! We’re friends! We’re trying to get back with our exes! She’s still in love with the guy!”

“Well, tell yourself those arguments, cause apparently they haven’t prevented you from falling for her…”

“I haven’t fallen, I just… I fancy her, ‘s all.”

“Yeah, of course. Of bloody course.”

“Alright, I need to think straight.”

“Why do you want to get back with Sam so badly anyway?”

“Because… Because I love her. Because she… I’m…”

“The honest answer,” Alex argued, staring mercilessly at his friend.

And Andrew hated him at that moment, for knowing him so fucking well, for not cutting him any slack, for pressing him on into acknowledging how he felt… even the ugly side of himself…

He stuttered, went silent, but Alex was there to push him again. Until Andrew turned to the window and stared at the inky sky where not a single light remained uncovered by heavy clouds. All darkness. The kind so absolute, one would not see a thing if they were lost in it.

He imagined your features on that darkness, painted it with the colour of your eyes, the softness of your skin, the warmth of your lips, built your image on the nothingness of the world.

He wanted Sam… he wanted…

“I want someone to know me,” he whispered, feeling the heaviness of the confession drain all his strengths out of his body, feeling empty as he let the words leave. “I want… I want to be known. I want companionship. I’m afraid to be alone. I’m scared. I’m scared no one else is ever going to know me the way Sam does, and love me anyway. After all, even she couldn’t…”

He fell silent, sniffed as tears gathered at the corners of his eyes.

“God, it’s so fucking hard to be unknown. To have no one like that anymore… It feels so fucking lonely…”

Alex had gotten up without a word nor sound, rested a hand on Andrew’s shoulder.

“Someone else can learn to know you that way again, Andy. You deserve it. You deserve to be loved for who you are. Maybe Y/N could…”

But Andrew shook his head, shook himself out of his friend’s grasp.

“No! No, this is ridiculous! I want Sam! I want Sam! I don’t want Y/N! It was just a flukes, just a glitch, just… I don’t know, a moment of madness! But I don’t want Y/N, I don’t like her, I want Sam…”

“Andy…”

“I want Sam. I must want Sam.”

Andrew rubbed at his forehead, tightly closing his eyes.

“And anyway… even if I don’t want Sam anymore, I can’t fall for Y/N. That’s just… that would just make everything so fucking complicated, and she’s so great, I can’t risk to lose her like that… That would be insane.”

“So… you could want someone else? I could introduce you to someone…”

“We’ll see… we’ll see… I… I don’t know.”

Andrew heaved a sigh, feeling the heaviness of sleep creep up his body. He looked at his watch.

“Christ, sorry, mate… it’s so fucking late… I’m sorry.”

“It’s alright. You can sleep on the couch tonight, it’s too late for you to drive, and you’re too upset for that.”

“Thank you.”

“Anytime, mate.”

They exchanged a pair of tired smiles, and while Alex was gone looking for some spare blanket and pillow, Andrew was gathering his thoughts and feelings. Trying to calm down.

He wasn’t falling for you. He didn’t have a crush on you. He wanted Sam, he didn’t want you. He couldn’t want you.

Andrew didn’t like you… he couldn’t like you…

… right?

[thebrightestwitchofherage]

April 7th, six months into the war

Since I woke up terrified, and had to run for my bomb shelter. I had to barricade myself in my house in case terrorists came.

I’ve never imagined that this war could happen let alone go on for so long.

People I know died, people I know were kidnapped (and thankfully rescued).

Thousands of rockets were fired, and I’ve had to run for my life countless times. For months my house was rattled by rockets, airplanes and bombings. Even my dogs are scared of random loud noises by now.

I also can’t recall a time *in my life* when so many foreign armies/ terror groups attacked us at once. There was a rise in violence and terror attacks.

Yet people here seem to have lost it: I’ve never saw so much antisemitism and bigotry. I’ve personally been sent death threats and slurs, and been harassed. All from seemingly peaceful and educated people, fuelled by misinformation, antisemitic rhetoric and blood libels.

The new trend is hating & harassing every Jews and Israeli in sight . Calling us Nazis and telling us we deserve it, and then having the nerve saying it’s about Zionism, not antisemitism.

There are currently 133 hostages still kept in captivity by Hamas, along with dozens of bodies

Bring them home now. Silence is unacceptable.

[saetoru]

[ BUSINESS DEAL ] DILUC RAGNVINDR.

“has anyone ever told you how beautiful your eyes are?”

diluc rolls his eyes as you giggle at the slurred comment, watching you mumble a quiet thank you as you refill the glass of the drunk stranger before you. he can’t help but huff as he takes a sip from his own glass, fighting the urge to knock what must be the millionth drink from the man’s hand.

it’s valentine’s day.

meaning, diluc gets to watch dozens of single men drink away their miseries and hit on you while he sits in his stool at the far corner of cat’s tail, swirling his glass of grape juice with a frown on his face. maybe he should be running his own tavern instead of watching you, but with every sly comment you get, he gets less concerned with angel’s share and more concerned with keeping an eye on you.

and you’re sweet—almost too sweet for your own good, laughing each comment off and maybe even throwing a flirty one back here and there. it’s never anything too serious, but he can’t read you, can’t tell if you like the attention or if you’re simply too kind to fully reject the advances of a guy after he’s had one too many drinks.

still, whether you enjoy the attention or not, diluc can’t help but feel a pang of…jealousy? is that what it is? he’s not too sure—but he’s long come to terms that there’s something a bit more than simple fondness in his heart for you, but he’s almost certain you don’t feel the same.

and he doesn’t blame you—you’re gentle and kind with something fierce about you underneath it all. you’re perfect and you should look for such, not settle for the distant and troubled man that he is.

“more grape juice?” you pop up before him and break his train of though before he even registers you’ve moved. he’s been too focused on glaring holes into the side of the man’s head from just a few seconds ago.

“i’ve had enough,” he mumbles, “but thank you.”

“you know, master diluc,” you grin, eyes crinkling in that ever so precious way they always do.

“i’ve already told you, you don’t have to keep referring to me as—”

“if i didn’t know any better, i’d say you’re trying to ruin business here.”

he blinks, and you giggle, and somewhere deep in his mind, he knows that you’re just messing with him. still, a more panicked part of him wonders if you think lowly of him enough to really think that.

“now, why would i do that?” he raises a brow, and for a fleeting second, at the sound of your soft chuckle, his heart does a painful squeeze and his palms grow sweaty.

“i guess you could call us business rivals,” you hum.

“i wouldn’t say so,” he shrugs, “although i wouldn’t mind having you tend to my own tavern instead.”

“oh, really? then—”

and then you’re interrupted, and there’s a figure slumping onto the stool beside diluc and leaning over the counter, pulling your attention off of him and onto the stranger that so rudely intruded the conversation he’s been waiting to have with you all night.

“and what’s a pretty face like you doing in a place like this?” the stranger purrs, and diluc’s grip on his glass gets tighter, the frown on his lips tugging into a deep scowl.

“oh,” you say shyly, looking down with a nervous laugh, “what can i get you, sir?”

“how much for a date?” the man grins.

before you can answer, diluc cuts in before he can really even think.

“nothing you could afford.” truthfully, he’s as shocked as you, but he ignores the confused look you give him in favor of glaring at the man that finally turns to him, watching as the stranger’s eyes widen slightly with recognition as soon as they fall onto the long, red locks.

there’s a slight bit of pride underneath all the irritation—which is unlike him. diluc doesn’t care for fancy titles and recognition, he doesn’t care of the rumors and gossip and he doesn’t care about what his name around town might be. but for some odd reason, he finds there’s a bit of pride when the man scurries away dejected—like there’s no doubt that between him and someone like diluc ragnvindr, the choice is clear.

he wonders if you feel that way, if in a tavern full of men, he’d be the one you’d pick. there’s an ache in his heart at the thought, a desperation he’s never felt before to be picked—to be wanted.

and maybe, even with everything he has, he has nothing at all if you’re not his too.

“see?” you ask, “you’ve definitely got it out for us, haven’t you? scaring off my customers.”

your voice pulls him back to reality, and now he’s blushing as he realizes he has to explain his actions to you as you stare at him expectantly. he almost wants to promptly exit, maybe never even leave the winery and show his face near here again so he doesn’t have to explain that yes, diluc ragnvindr, the most eligible bachelor of mondstadt, is jealous.

“i-it’s not like that,” he tries to explain, “i just…”

“just wanted make our prices seem too high to our customers?” you raise a brow.

there’s amusement in your eyes—and he thinks for a moment that you must be enjoying watching him squirm, that you must enjoy making him trip over his words and scramble to find an appropriate explanation.

“no!” he says quickly, “i’m sure you know just as well as i do that men in taverns are hardly respectable ones, so i just—”

“and do tell, master diluc,” you come closer, coming face to face with your nose almost brushing against his. he can see the flecks in your eyes and feel your lingering warmth from this close, making his heart stop completely and his hand clutch his glass so tight, he wonders how it’s not shattered yet. “who is a respectable man?”

“well—”

“perhaps sir kaeya is more suitable—”

“certainly not,” he scowls, missing the way you bite back a grin, “the knights are hardly trustworthy either.”

“so then who might that leave,” you wonder out loud, “ah, i see. then that leaves you, doesn’t it?”

diluc thinks you’re trying to kill him. he thinks you must be trying to get rid of him and hurt his business instead, because why else would you make his poor heart palpitate like this? there’s a satisfied smirk on your face, a smug and all too mischievous one that makes him wish he’d have downed a few glasses of wine instead of juice.

“and if it does?” to his credit, his voice is still smooth and confident, the only remaining thread of dignity he has left for the night.

“well, with the wine industry at your fingertips, you must be able to afford most things rather easily.”

and perhaps, all this time, you really have felt the same—he thinks it’s certainly a possibility when your forehead meets his and your noses brush.

“i suppose so,” he hums, and before he can change his mind, he takes a chance. “well then, name your price for a date.”

he watches the way your eyes soften ever so slightly up close, and with a bright grin, you turn your head, pecking his cheek swiftly before pulling away.

“it’s on the house,” you say cheekily, ���consider us business partners.”

this is all bc bub sent me a diluc tik tok that made me just about pass out

[magidoggie]

A LOOK INTO SHI/HIR PRONOUNS AND THEIR ORIGINS

So I’ve seen people claim that shi/hir pronouns are intersex exclusive (mostly intersex people), and others say they aren’t (mostly non-intersex people)

As an intersex person, I've been confused about this for a while, so I decided to look into it

THIS POST WILL CONTAIN NSFW TOPICS, FURRIES, TALKS OF FETISHIZATION OF INTERSEX BODIES, AND INTERSEX SLURS!

Most of the users of these pronouns seem to be non-intersex people, but there are also intersex people who use them.

I've seen a decent amount of intersex people say that shi/hir pronouns are only ours to use, as they were used against us (like a shortened version of he-she). This would make them basically slurs that only we can reclaim.

I've even seen some claims that Geoffrey Chaucer himself coined these words?? (The chaucer thing, I haven't been able to find a source for. Even so, it is most likely just an old spelling of "she/her")

I’ve seen people say it originated on 4chan. It'd be hard to verify, as 4chan is known for not keeping threads up for long. There are 4chan archives, but I've tried my hardest to look for any combinations of things like "shi" and different terms that could work with it like "intersex" "freak" or "hermaphrodite" . I don't doubt it's been used on 4chan, but I can't find much, and archival sites don't go back far enough.

Regardless, the pronouns seem quite old. One thing I did find under the search of ""4chan" shi hir" on Google, was a.. descriptive post on a furry porn website called e621.net

Okay, 13 years ago, that's a start. It certainly contains the word "herm" (short for hermaphrodite), and the word intersex used with this pronoun.

Godspeed TheShadowfox42 I hope you found the image.

Using Google's "Before:(date)" feature, I searched "shi herm before:2010", and unsurprisingly, I found a lot of furry porn.

Stories on sofurry.com, a furry website that looks to be from at least 2007, if not older. I'll spare you the details, but indeed, there, they use shi/hir pronouns for their "herm" characters. Did these pronouns originate from.. furries?? I put that though aside for now, to look further into other uses.

As it turns out, the journey does not end at 2007. Urban dictionary has an entry from 2003

No slurs here, it looks like a neutral usage. Again, going back to Google. Now, search terms "hir "gender neutral" before:2004"

Many results show up now, now articles rather than furries. American.edu (seems to be a university), Swarthmore.edu (this is a college), both from 2001. jstor.org with a journal article from 1999. Unfortunately I can't read that one, as I have to pay a whole $63 to purchase it. I even found a PDF file from 1994 by core.ac.uk

But, what I've realized now is this is not usage of shi/hir pronouns. All of these use Ze/hir pronouns. I don't know if there is any link, but the last pronoun looking the same must've obscured the results.

From the american.edu article on these pronouns. You can see the usage of "hir" alongside "ze", and below it, the usage of ze/zir pronouns, which seem to be used more today.

Shit.. Doing the search all over again with the pronoun "shi" yields.. very few results apart from people talking about Chinese words.

Wait what about those furries from earlier? The tvtropes.org article does include this:

Chakona space? Chakats? Pronouns he came up with? Admittedly I kept seeing these centaur feline hybrid characters come up quite consistently during this dive, but I had to look into it further.

Oh buddy what did I get myself into. This is from 2001 best I can tell, so we're getting quite old here. I scroll down on the page.

And lower down.

Now this is all very interesting speculative biology, but what I'm focusing on is again, the usage of "hermaphrodite" together with the pronouns "shi/hir". Did a furry artist named Bernard Doove come up with these pronouns.

It gets yet older.. New search, "chakats "shi" before:2001"

Again, Bernard Doove's art from 2000, 1999, 1998,

I find a website called yerf.metafur.org It has furry art, dating all the way back to the mid 1990's, but here, on December 23 1998, is the first appearance of these pronouns on that site.

This Bernard Doove person has been at this project, with these pronouns for a while.

From what I can tell, many of his art pieces, they seem to be quite sexual beings. Quite fetishistic of hermaphroditism at times. (or intersexuality, take your pick)

The other thing I found with my search was a website, furry.org.au/bosshoss/

My search says it's from September 14 1998.

That's certainly some information, but it might come in handy. So Chakat Goldfur provided this website? Who is that? Looking into it, that seems to be a character created by Bernard Doove, that acts as an alter ego. Further down, the person running this website lists some other websites they enjoy. One being "Proxima Centauri", which seems to be another furry artist.

"I met this one at ConFURence 8. Very interesting. (Did I mention shi is a hermaphrodite uni-centaur?)"

(For context, ConFURence is a furry convention held in 1997)

Again, the usage of hermaphrodite, and the pronoun shi. At this point, the website being linked to is long gone, but the wayback machine provides help. The website, http://www.spots.ab.ca/~unicorn/main.htm has been captured all the way back to October 8th 1997.

At this time, the website was under construction. No images are willing to load and haven't been archived, but the description is intact.

So this person uses shi/hir pronouns for their hermaphroditic character all the way back in 1997. There are links to other places where this person used to host their works, but they are all down and haven't been archived. The thread is running thin..

Back to Bernard Doove, the Chakat creator. There must be something more to this. Turns out, there was. On the "yerf" website, I actually found several art pieces that were not picked up by Google.

Febuary 22 1997. Getting yet older. In some art pieces, Bernard references "Forest Tale" and "forest tales", so I went looking for whatever that was.

1995?? you've got to be kidding. It's an adult story involving these "chakat" beings, and sure enough, down the page

Shi/hir pronouns used over and over again.

With the use of hermaphrodite.

But.. This is kind of where it ends. I couldn't seem to find anything older, and I'm not going to contact Bernard Doove over this. Even something as old as 29 years is impressive to me. Bernard Doove states his characters were inspired by other furry artists' creatures of the time, but since it's 1995, there isn't much left for me to find here. Anything before that time is probably lost.

With all the information I have been able to gather, it looks to shi/hir pronouns were created by Bernard Doove who is a furry author and artist. Shi/hir were made to be a midway between "she" and "him" in some way, to be a gender neutral word for hermaphroditic genetically modified beings called "chakats" in his stories. As an intersex person myself, I don't enjoy the use of "hermaphrodite" in such a way, as it's a slur for us. But these types of characters also seem to be very old, and we, and our struggles, were completely unknown to the vast majority of people, even moreso than nowadays.

If you use those pronouns for an intersex person who doesn't use them, it is indeed intersexist, as you are implying we are hermaphrodites.

But as for whether only intersex people can use them? I'm not sure. The original intent doesn't seem be directly linked to intersex people. You could argue that these hermaphroditic characters are fetishized versions of how many people see us, and have seen us for a long time. Afterall, hermaphrodite was, and still is, a common slur for us.

I don't doubt some people have used these pronouns as slurs against us as well, but I also haven't found anything specifically that supports that. It always seemed to be for specific fictional characters that COULD be based off specific intersex attributes

I'm not going to argue one way or the other. This was just me trying to find what I could about these pronouns and their history. Just be mindful of how you use these pronouns, and the connections they have to fetishes revolving around the common misinterpretation of intersex bodies (as in, "having both parts")

Thank you for reading.

I hope you learned something. I know I did, and I now have a headache.

[tkaulitzlvr]

could i request a drunk tom? like what would happen if he drinks too much and the reader is with him 👀

INTOXICATED - T. KAULITZ

synopsis: when tom gets a little too drunk after a night out, it’s your job to get him home in one piece - which turns out to be a lot harder than it seems.

content: fluff

a/n: i really hope you like it thank you so much for the request!!

i had lost sight of tom, looking for the familiar black braids and bandana amongst the crowd of drunken bodies, knowing that my boyfriend would be there somewhere. he was already tipsy before he’d left me, the alcohol getting to him faster than it usually would. he’d told me that he was going to get another drink and that he’d “be right back”, so i had stayed put on the sofa we were sat at, slowly sipping my porn star martini and waiting for him to arrive. that was 10 minutes ago, and, despite knowing how crazy my boyfriend can get after a few too many drinks, i still began to grow worried, standing up and moving through the endless sea of sweaty bodies, but none of them were tom.

calling out his name would be pointless - the music was so loud that i couldn’t even hear the conversation going on right next to me, let alone would tom be able to hear me calling him. instead, i settled on searching the entire place for him, with little success. it was a saturday night, the bar completely packed as expected. after a chorus of “sorry” and “excuse me”s, i finally made me way out of the crowd, and to the bar, seeing tom drunk out of his mind, empty shot glasses around him. i storm over, him turning to see me as a large grin spreads across his face.

“babyyyyyy!” he slurs, reaching out and trying to pull me into a hug from the barstool he is sat on.

“don’t baby me tom! what happened to ‘coming right back’? i’ve been looking for you everywhere.” i scold, looking at his face and seeing that he is far too wasted to even realise how angry i am.

“sorry, i just wanted a drink.” he smiles lazily, gesturing to the empty glasses infront of him.

“a drink? how many have you had since you left? jesus christ how are you even still conscious?” i question, sitting at the bar stool next to him, not even attempting to count the shots he’d been shoving down his throat - the answer would have only frustrated me even more than i already was.

he was completely shitfaced. i don’t think he even realised that i was talking to him, or, talking at all. all that he could do was grin like an idiot, constantly trying to grab me or kiss me, placing his hands anywhere that they could reach, reminding me how turned on he gets when drunk - even more than his usual self. “i don’t know, maybe like 3? or 9? you should have some too!” he chuckles, failing to see the unimpressed look on my face, as i stare at him blankly.

“and who would take us home if i did? you were meant to drive us, remember? i can’t drink anything else ‘cause it looks like i’ll be the one doing it.” i sigh, resting my head in my hands, wondering how the fuck i’ll be able to get this man out of the bar and into a car without losing my sanity.

“whattt? no, schatz, i’ll drive. i’m perfectly fine, look.” he attempts to sit straight, this apparently sufficing as proof for his sobriety, but the second he removes his torso from where it was resting on the table, he wobbles slightly, trying to play it off as a stretch.

“see?” he says, genuinely proud of himself, a satisfied smile appearing on his face.

“jesus fucking christ.” i mutter, taking a deep breath. “you can’t even sit straight. i’m driving baby, end of.”

he nods, accepting my answer before finishing the last of his glass, holding his arm out and trying to wave the bartender over.

“tom what are you doing?” i ask, putting my hand over his and placing it back on the table.

“getting another drink.” he shrugs, saying those words so nonchalantly as if he isn’t one more sip away from passing out.

“are you insane? you’re absolutely wasted, let’s go.” i say, knowing that it won’t end here.

“noooo! im just getting started, let’s stay, please baby?” he begs, staring into my eyes and rubbing his thumb over my thigh, trying to win me over. his eyes were tired, half-lidded as he looked at me through them, completely out of it.

“no, come on baby. we’re leaving.” i insist, grabbing his hand and lifting him upwards, his arm wrapping itself around my shoulder as we begin to walk out. surprisingly, he could hold himself up pretty well - it was walking in something even remotely close to a straight line that proved impossible for him. when we reach the crowd of intoxicated bodies past the bar, he quickly pulls out of my grasp, taking my hand and leading me into it.

“let’s dance.” he slurs, attempting to grab my waist and pull it against his crotch, running his hands up and down my body.

“are you crazy? we are going home, come on.” i pull away from him, irritated by his advances but not at all surprised. normally, i wouldn’t complain when he acted this way, but when i wanted nothing more to be home and in bed, my body tired from having to look after him for this long, it only angered me more, dancing with him the last thing on my mind. my hand finds his once again, roughly trying to pull him through the flood of people, not without him opening his mouth once again.

“did i tell you how beautiful you look tonight?” he whispers in my ear, mumbling his words as he can barely utter a sentence, his hand falling to my ass and giving it a rough squeeze. i gasp, quickly turning my head to face him. his eyes are hooded, full of lust, a proud smirk plastered across his face.

“tom stop! not right now.” i hiss, shaking my head and turning back to the doors as i push through them, hearing him laugh behind me.

“you know you liked it.” he mumbles, taking my hand as i hold it out for him, scanning the empty streets and trying to make out tom’s car in the darkness, the dimly lit street lamps providing next to no light.

i ignore his response, eventually making out the familiar r8 and turning to tom. “keys?” i ask as he slowly searches his pockets, pulling them out and tossing them to me, this the first time he has actually done something without trying to make a quick remark, or completely ignore what i had asked.

“come on.” i sigh, pulling him towards the passenger side and struggling to put him in the car. he laughs at my fight with his stubbornness, clearly finding this whole situation amusing. i manage to sit him down, pointing to his seatbelt.

“put it on.” i say, running out of patience with him.

“hmmm i think you should do it.” he smiles, staying put and waiting for me.

“fuck me.” i mutter, grabbing the seatbelt and wrapping it around his body until it clicks in place.

“gladly baby.” he smiles, happy with himself as he reaches for his jacket, trying to pull it from his frame.

“you know i didn’t mean it like that.” i shake my head, pulling the jacket back on and closing the door rushing over to the drivers seat, scared of leaving him alone for even a few seconds. i open the door, sitting down as tom quickly reaches over, planting a sloppy kiss onto my cheek, his breath smelling so strongly of alcohol that it takes me aback.

“i love youuuu.” he says, looking at me and resting his hand on my thigh. i laugh slightly, my heart melting at his attempt to be romantic, even in this state.

“i love you too.” i sigh, turning the engine on as it hums quietly over the radio. tom starts to tap his hands against the dash to the beat at an obnoxiously loud volume, but i am far too tired to even try get him to stop, letting him carry on as i begin the short drive home.

“come on, up the stairs. then we can go to bed, okay?” he let’s out a small “mhm”, kicking off his shoes as he does so, letting them tumble down the stairs, knowing that i’ll be the one to clean his mess in the morning.

he stumbles his way upwards, reaching the top of the stairs and walking into our shared bedroom. his body flops onto the bed, sinking into the sheets with a loud sigh. i pull him upwards, studying the oversized jeans and shirt he is wearing, knowing that he isn’t fit to change clothes himself.

without saying a word, i reach for the hem of his t-shirt, lifting the material over his head.

“woah baby, slow down! if you wanted to fuck you should’ve just asked.” he smiles, taking both of his hands and putting them on my waist, using his tongue to play with his lip piercing.

“we aren’t fucking tom, not when you’re like this. you need to get changed, you can’t sleep in this.” i explain as he sighs in disappointment.

“such a tease.” he mumbles, undoing the button of his jeans and pulling them off, sliding under the covers whilst i get into my own pyjamas, joining him in bed as he quickly holds my waist, his chest against my back, head rested in my neck. he places a long kiss on the bare skin, holding my waist and gently caressing it.

“goodnight.” i say. silence. for the first time tonight, he says nothing. i sigh in relief, shutting my eyes and assuming that he has fallen asleep.

“you sure you don’t want to fuck?”

requests are open! keep sending them in!!

[yngtort]

Cheater cheater, best friend eater

chan | lino | changbin | hyunjin | jisung | felix | seungmin | jeongin

NSFW ★

──────────

Xfem!reader You and jeongin had been best friends for years. He would do anything and everything to protect you. So when you call him drunk, crying your eyes out, he doesn’t hesitate to come to your rescue.

“Y/nnn, open up. I’m here.” He says as he knocks on the door of your apartment.

When you open the door, jeongin has to hold back a laugh at your clearly intoxicated state. Your eyes were blown out, while you subtly swayed as you stood. Dry tears littered your face, almost looking like a kid had taken chalk and went crazy.

“Hey,” you said, voice hoarse.

“Hurry up and let me in, it’s freezing.” Jeongin says, still stifling a laugh. He pushes his way into the apartment, locking the door behind him.

“How much have you had?” He asks before taking off his jacket his leather jacket, placing it on the back of the couch, and taking a seat.

You plop beside him. “not that much. Just two or three…bottles.”

“You’re joking, right?” Jeongin says in disbelief, looking at you almost like he was impressed. “What happened this time?”

A long sigh makes it passed your lips as you thought about how you ended up like this. Your boyfriend, Chris , had cheated on you after two years of dedication. You found out from changbin, a mutual friend of yours. He apologized for not telling you sooner and that he was tired of being an accomplice to Chris’s betrayal.

Go to him, you suppose.

But you didn’t cry because you were sad. it was just frustrating that you didn’t see the signs before hand. The relationship was already fizzling out— you and Chris argued every night. But for him to cheat on you, it was just insane. You hated being played, it’s the worst fucking feeling ever.

“Didn’t I tell you that he was a dick?” He clicked his tongue. “Your taste in men is deplorable.”

He’s right. You wish you could deny it, but the list of toxic men you’ve dated was extensive. That list also doubles as a list of how many jaws jeongin had broken.

“I’m just glad you’re done with him.” He said with a smile and you let out a nervous chuckle.

His smile dropped. “You are done with him, right?”

“Of course I am.. I just..” you scratched the back of your head, eyes darting around the room. “I haven’t actually broken up with him yet.”

“Excuse me?” He quirked an eyebrow. “The fuck do you mean you didn’t break up? Are you crazy?”

“I just don’t know how to bring it up.”

Jeongin scoffed, “oh but you can bring up ending our friendship over a pudding cup.”

“We were like 16-” “I don’t want to hear it.”

You rolled your eyes and sunk into the couch, wishing it would just swallow you whole.

“So what are you gonna do? Stay with him?” He asked.

“Of course not. I’m just-“ you paused.

“just being an idiot? Baby, I know.”

“Fuck you.”

Jeongin laughed, patting your knee. “Well until you figure out what you want to do, let’s pound some rum and coke. Yeah?”

—

A hour had gone past as you both sat there, passing a bottle a Hennessy back and forth. Shark boy and lava girl, collectively both of your favorite movie, played on the tv.

“Seriously, we shudda been them for Halloween.” Jeongin slurred, handing you the bottle.

“Next year.” You took a swig, slightly wincing at the wretched taste . “Fuck, I’m done. ‘Can’t keep drinkin this shit.”

Jeongin snickers, watching you set it down on the table. “Weak.” He taunted.

“Shut it, I’ve been drinkin all day. (Bc of Chris.) I hate men.” You grumbled, eyes narrowed.

Jeongin could tell how much this Chris incident was bothering you, although you barely showed it. he knew that you were probably blaming yourself, thinking you’re not good enough. But you more than enough, to him for sure. and he wanted you to know that.

Grinning, jeongin threw an arm around your shoulders and pulled you into his side. “know what? Just forget about these boys and just date me instead.”

You blinked, not knowing wether to take him seriously or not.

“ want us—Like me and you—” you pointed between the two of you. “To date?”

he was joking. He had to be. You’ve been best friends for practically your whole lives. Even when people tried to get yall together, not a single time did you ever consider it actually happening. And you were sure that jeongin felt the same way.

“I mean why not? I’d treat you better than any of your exes.” He said, eyes glancing down at your lips. “In more ways than one.”

He definitely didn’t feel the same way.

You felt the tips of your ears start to burn and you really hoped that it was because of the obsessive drinking. Jeongin seemed to notice and before you know it, his arm left your shoulder and slid to your waist.

“Jeongin,” “yes, baby?” He leaned in, free hand on your thigh.

oh.

“You’re drunk,” you place a hand on his chest trying to keep his body from moving any further. “You don’t know what you’re talking about”

“Then just blame it on the alcohol.” He chuckled. “I’ll take care of you for tonight and if you regret it in the morning, I’ll take full responsibility.”

—

If someone would’ve told yourself from a hour ago, that you’d be pressed down into the cushion of the couch by your best friend ; you wouldn’t have believed a word.

You wouldn’t be able fathom having jeongins head buried between your thighs as his tongue lapped over your clit with precision. Your hands tangled in his hair while you shamelessly rutted against his face.

You were a complete mess in your best friends hold and jeongin loved every second of it.

“So needy. Just look at you.” He said, planting kisses on your core. His member strained against his pants, begging to be set free. He had to focus on drawing soft circles on your hips, trying keep himself from flipping you over and pounding into you.

That’ll come later, but first he wanted to make you feel good on your own.

“Fuck— jeongin. ‘Mm so close,” You moaned out, head tossed over the arm of the couch as His tongue dipped in and out of you. you could feel your stomach tighten, orgasm creeping over until it bursts.

your body shakes violently as it rakes over you like a storm and jeongin has to hold you in place, still licking your clit as you cum. “S-stop it, inn. It’s too much.” You whimpered pathetically.

“shh, baby. Just a bit more” he whispered, still sucking you raw.

When he pulls his tongue off you, a string of saliva was the only connection between him and your core.

He moves up, bringing his lips to yours and you could taste yourself on his tongue. You could feel his length press against you, making you whine into the kiss.

You wanted him bad. Your fingers found their way to the waistband of his pants.

“Goddamn it, y/n” Jeongin pulled back with a hiss once he felt you free his member, taking it into your hand. “You’re so impenitent. want me to fill you up, yea?” He grunted, bucking his hips in your palm.

“Please,” You begged through a short breath. “Fuck, jeongin. Please, I need it.”

“Baby, it’s already in your hands. I’m sure you can figure it out. You’re such a smart girl.”

hearing him speak like that had an effect on you like no other. you were clenching around nothing, wondering if this was the same man you called your best friend. It was conflicting but it made you hornier than ever.

without hesitation, you positioned his member at your entrance.

“Good job, love.” Jeongin praised, planting a soft kiss and on your temple.

he slipped his tip inside, but to your surprise, didn’t go any further. Instead, he pumped his head in and out of your entrance, feeling it stretch and close around his dick. The constant teasing made you hyper aware of that certain spot. “Inn.” You whimpered, hands finding their way to hips. “Don’t play with me like this. Just fuck me.”

A wicked grin formed across his face as he got the reaction he wanted. “I’m sorry baby,” he chuckled, “ ‘just so fun seeing you clench and try to hold me in there.”

He grabbed your wrist, pinning them above your head.

“Forgive me, yeah?” He asked. Although he knew you’d never respond because you were to busy crying over his dick that he pushed inside you.

every inch of his girth was buried in your warmth.

He clicked his tongue, “Tight, you’re so fucking tight. Has Chris not been fucking you right??” He rasped into your ear, his hips starting a steady and sensual pace.

no, not like this. You had never been treated like this. Not by Chris— not by anyone. “If I had known, I would’ve done this sooner.”

His thrusts were strong and deep, dick brushing that spot that made your toes curl. The hand he held on Your stomach, pushing it, added that extra pressure that had you crying out his name. “you’re so good for me. Sucking me up so well.”

you continued on like that, your best friend fucking you dumb until you’re spluttering mess. Even when he flipped you onto your stomach— he didn’t miss a single beat. It felt like nothing could stop you two.

But when your phone goes off on the coffee table, there’s a pause. It was small interval, enough time for jeongin to reach over and grab it.

“Looks like that boyfriend of yours is missing you.” He pulled you up by your hair, back against his chest. “Lets answer it, hmm?”

Before you could even think about protesting, the phone was being pressed to your cheek as jeongin went back to fucking you from behind.

“Hey, babe. I’ve been trying to call you all day. Is the there something wrong?” Chris asks, but you could barely comprehend his words.

Jeongin pounded into you, hips slapping against yours and you know Chris can hear it. And if he can’t, he could definitely hear your cries. “Chris— ngh!”

“Y/n, what’s going on? Where are you?”

Jeogin chuckles from behind, pulling the phone back. “sorry, been really busy hasn’t she?” He asked bringing a mix of confusion and anger to the man on the other line.

“Who the fuck is this? Let me talk to y/n.”

“I would but,” Jeongin sucked in a breath, “she’s got her hands full.”

You didn’t know when their conversation ended or if jeongin had even hung up or not. you were too busy getting your back blown out.

“You must’ve liked the thought of him hearing you like that, huh? You were clenching so hard around me, I thought it would break off” He rasped, hips snapping wildly.

“Inn, inn, inn.” You cried, tears welling up in your eyes.

His hips stuttered, a telling sign that he was reaching his limit. Heat built in both of your stomachs, aching for relief. “Gonna fill you to the brim ‘n make you mine.” He whimpered, leaning down, nuzzling his face into the curve of your neck. “Love you so much, Ugh.”

“Me too, inn.” You mewled, rocking in rhythm with his rut. That action in its self has jeogins dick twitching, his load following swiftly after.

He milked himself until his seed was spilling out of you with each pump. “Such a mess.” He whispered, sliding out of you.

Your poor couch.

The rest of the night was spent in the confines of your bed, both you and jeongin confessing some unsaid feelings— before sharing slow and wet kisses until you were eventually lulled to sleep.

:)

[bellarkeselection]

Request yellowstone Lee dutton

Reader is drunk and she calls her friend jamie to come pick her up jamie tells his dad and brother reader calls and needs to be pick up at a bar so lee and jamie go when they gets there some guy was hitting on her and Lee saves her and jamie being a lawyer threatens him

Dutton Boys Got My Back

Sitting up at the bar I downed another beer and added it to my section of ones I had finished in the few hours I have been here. Tonight I needed a release from having a fight with my mother over the fact that I had stuck around with the Dutton family. She wanted me to leave Montana but I felt like I belonged here and nowhere else. “Can I get another Liam?”

“Don’t you think you’ve had enough?” The bartender asked me.

Shaking my head I snapped back. “Nah I don’t think so. Now get me another before I call my buddies.”

“Okay don’t start a fight in my bar.” He warned me walking away to get another beer.

Taking my phone out of my pocket I scoffed scrolling through my contacts until I found Jaime’s cell. We had been close up until his daddy had sent him off to become a lawyer. Now I knew if I ever got in trouble he’d bail me out. Hitting he call button I finished the remainder of my beer. “Hey Jaime…you working on any big cases?”

“Not tonight. What are you doing?” He asked me.

Slurring my words the bartender came back giving me my new drink. “Just having some drinks after fighting with my mother again this year. That women don’t understand my life…”

“How many drinks have you had?” He questioned me.

Sitting my beer bottle down I answered him back. “It don’t matter, Jaime. Just enough to know….have we ever gone out dancing together. We should do that tonight. Come and pick me up.”

“I’ll be there in a few.” He responded ending the phone call.

I wasn’t sure how long I had been sitting there but it was long enough to know I should’ve probably left hours ago. Half the time I came out to the bar with Beth. The other times it was rare if I got Lee and Jaime out and off that ranch for the night. Lee and I always have something more going on then what we are actually comfortable to admit to ourselves. I’ve had a crush on him for years and I’d be married to him if my mother would allow it. “Dutton’s mean nothing but trouble.” She’d say to me during some of our arguments.

“What’s a pretty gal like you sitting up here all alone. Drowning your emotions in alcohol is no way to go.” A random guy came up to me but he nearly collapsed on top of the bar top telling me he was more drunk then I was.

Taking a sip from my beer I sent him a smirk. “That’s none of your business, buddy.”

“It kinda is a part of my business. I wanna….spend a round with you.” He gets up close to me pushing his Boyd up against mine nearly spilling his drink in my lap.

Glancing up at him I shook my head knowing exactly what he wanted tonight. He was one of the guys that think they can sleep with any girl that by herself. Beth taught me how to deal with men like this. Getting to my feet I stared into his eyes. “I have no interest in you.”

“You don’t have to lie to me.” The drunk man said back to me, quickly grabbing me by my hips bringing me close against his chest and I couldn’t move since my back was pressed to the bar top behind me. “You want this as much as I do.”

Gripping the bottle in my hand I throw it over his head and he stumbled backwards. “You little bitch!”

He moved forward grabbing me by my shoulders shoving me against the hard wood behind me. I grunted feeling my arms get some cuts on them from how hard he pushed me. He got in my face and I bared my teeth trying to fight him when he slipped a hand underneath my shirt. I screamed hitting his chest but he slapped me across the face. He would have done it a second time if someone hadn’t yanked him back by the collar of his jacket. “Why don’t you keep your hands off of her.”

“I wasn’t doing anything wrong.” The drunk guy grumbled to the guy.

Blinking my eyes I sniffed through some tears recognizing the cowboy that had stepped in and protected me. “Lee, aren’t you a sight for sore eyes.”

“Why don’t you get your hands off of me, cowboy. I ain’t done anything wrong…because she enjoys being around me.” The stranger got up in the oldest Dutton’s face.

Lee glanced in my direction. “Why’d you hit him, darling?”

“Tried to get handsy after I told him I wasn’t interested.” Crossing my arms over my chest I answered his question.

“Did you hear that, brother?” Lee called over his shoulder allowing me the chance to see his brother Jaime come inside the bar. He was dressed in his suit and tie looking like he didn’t belong there. Yet either way I was happy to see my friend knowing he would fix this without anyone beer bottles to the head.

He nodded in agreement. “Sure did. I’ll take it from here. Who’s the more intoxicated one here?”

“He is. I told him I wasn’t interested and he still came on me.” Pointing my index finger at the drunk.

Jaime made a noise. “I’d suggest you leave this girl alone for the rest of the night. Unless you wish to be taken to court.”

“You can’t take me to court.” He says.

Lee and I glanced at one another with Jaime closing the gap between them almost completely. “I’d advise you choose your next words carefully. sir. My father owns the largest ranch in the state and this girl you think is here for some fun is a very close friend of ours. And I can smell alcohol and see some cuts on her arm’s meaning you could be filed for public intoxication. Like I said go home and avoid trouble.”

“So I was told you asked for a ride home. I’m here to pick ya up, darling.” Lee shrugged his shoulders at me once the drunk had stumbled off somewhere else making it just the three of us.

Grabbing my jacket I closed the gap between us leaning up on my toe’s taking him by surprise. “I appreciate it, Lee. Do me a favor and don’t think I’m doing this just because I’m a little tipsy. I….rather like you.” Leaning up on my toes I grabbed his collar drawing him down to me where I gave him a kiss rather quickly.

“What was that for?” He asked me turning a little red once we separated from each other.

Winking at him I walked through the door. “That’s a thank you for my Dutton boys coming to get me.”

“Take her to the truck and I’ll pay the tab.” Jaime told his brother at the same time that Lee scooped me up bridal style making me giggle at his actions. Wrapping my arms around his neck I laid my head on his chest.

Lee chuckled sitting his hat on top of my head carrying me outside to the truck. “If there’s more thank you’s like that one in the future I wouldn’t mind.”

“As long as your okay with my momma not liking you then we have a good chance.” I grinned at him where he helped me inside the passenger seat. He shut the door gently and kissed my forehead before I passed out waiting for Jaime to come outside so we could go home for the evening.

Lee brushed hair behind my ear he smiled lovingly. “We always come when somebody like you calls.” That was a very true statement since every time I called them they had come without a thought of hesitation because that is what family does for one another.

Comments really appreciated ❤️

[starboyshoyo]

A New Beginning

Pairing: Silver x fem!reader (romantic). Lilia Vanrouge (platonic)

Fandom: Twisted Wonderland

Word Count: 800

Genre: fluff; hurt/comfort

Warnings: mentions of alcohol, afab reader, pregnancy. Nothing explicit.

After your wedding to Silver, you have a heart-to-heart with your new father-in-law.

The murmur of the wedding guests surrounds you, muffled through the thick padding of a private tent’s curtains. There was more than enough chatter happening inside the tent as well, though- for your new father-in-law, Lilia Vanrouge, wasn’t one for silence.

“Oh, and don’t forget this,” Lilia hums as he drops another one of his ‘good luck charms’ onto the steadily-growing pile in Silver’s arms. “It’s a coin from an ancient civilization that I fought against in my glory days- consider it a christening gift for the new house!” He sniffs dramatically. “My little boy is all grown up now, and living on his own~”

“Father, I’ve been living in my own home for a year now,” Silver chides him. Still, he balances the heap of mismatched items in his hands with great care- a testament to how much his father’s love meant to him. “And I won’t be alone. Y/N will be living there as well-“

“Silver!” An excited voice calls your new husband’s name. A very tipsy Kalim stumbles towards you, almost crashing into your shoulder when he gives you a kiss on the cheek in greeting. Jamil follows, not far behind him. The two Scarabian boys are still wearing their groomsmen outfits, though Kalim’s is noticeably stained with wine.

“Silver, we’ve been looking all over for you!” Kalim hiccups, grinning, “Jamil and I prepared a present for you, but we weren’t able to give it to you before the wedding. Come on!” He tugs at Silver’s sleeve.

Jamil sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose. “What Kalim means to say is that I prepared a wedding gift for you,” he explained to Silver, an emphasis on the word I. “It’s quite heavy and unwieldy, so we’d appreciate it if you could follow us so we may present it to you without having to lug it all the way over here.”

“What he said!” Kalim slurs. “It’s so awesome, I promise! Just come and see!”

Silver looks between the two boys. “I suppose if my wife is okay with it, I could spare some time.” He looks towards you. “You were feeling nauseous earlier. Will you be alright on your own?”

“Of course,” you assure Silver, “Go have fun! There’s plenty of time for us to spend together later.”

Silver nods, before being led away by the duo.

Now, alone in the tent with Lilia, you ponder what to say. The ancient fae had watched the exchange with an amused smirk that belied his age. It was always a bit strange how much more youthful he seemed; even more so than his own son.

You’re saved from having to make conversation when Lilia speaks first. “I’m glad Silver has found such a wonderful wife to be by his side,” he smiles at you. “Why, if he hadn’t wed you, I’d be minding him until the day his hair turned gray.”

That gets a laugh out of you. Of course, your beloved husband’s hair is already gray. The unusual color of his hair was the reason Lilia named him Silver in the first place. Still, the implications of the jibe are not lost on you- Lilia is a fae, while Silver is human. He would watch his own son grow old many times over before he acquired a single wrinkle of his own.

“It must be hard,” you say aloud, “to be an immortal fae. To know that one day, you will outlive your own kin.”

It’s macabre talk for a wedding. The old wives tales’ you heard as a child hiss at you from the back of your mind, warning you to hush up. But Lilia doesn’t seem to mind.

“It is,” he affirms. “To live a long life is to walk a different path than those you love. But I can rest easy now, knowing that my son has you to walk alongside him and care for him, even in your old age.”

He meets your gaze with his own piercing eyes, full of wisdom beyond the visible years. Then, suddenly, he breaks into a smile. “Or… at least he’ll get a taste of cooking other than my own.”

You giggle.The serious atmosphere disperses itself, as if it had never existed at all. “Alright, grandpa. Whatever you say.”

“Grandpa? Are you perhaps trying to tell me something, my dear daughter-in-law?”

You pause, glancing down at your midsection. “Well, yes, actually.”

“Well, I’ll be! You could have just led with that.” Lilia booms out a laugh. “How long?”

“Just a few weeks,” your voice drops to a hush, “But don’t tell Silver just yet! I’m planning to surprise him later.”

Lilia chuckles. “I suppose I can stay quiet, then.”

While the old fae is calm on the outside, you didn't miss the way his eyes lit up with mirth at the news of your promise- a promise of new life.

Comments and reblogs are greatly appreciated!

[wistfulcynic]

as an American who’s spent the past 15 years in the UK it’s always been both interesting and clear to me that Ted Lasso, while set and filmed in the UK with mostly non-American actors, is a show made for Americans. The language choices, the references--even many of those made by non-American characters--are all chosen for maximum impact on an American audience. 

never has that been clearer than in this latest episode. Isaac, who we know was raised in London, hears a fan call his best friend what the team later refers to as “the other f-word.” His temper snaps and he leaps into the stands to confront the fan in Colin’s defence. 

it’s a powerful scene and--with an American audience in mind--it does make sense that the writers would choose that word as the one to set Isaac off. It’s a word some Youths have been reclaiming recently, but for American-grown people my age (not coincidentally also Jason Sudeikis’ age), we grew up knowing it as a vicious slur and have a visceral reaction to hearing it. 

British people don’t. They use it casually, in reference to a cigarette. In its longer form it means meatballs. People here are broadly aware that it’s a slur in American English but they don’t feel the impact of that, not the way Americans do. It was years before i stopped flinching every time my coworkers went out for a cigarette. I’ve had gay coworkers who used it (to mean cigarette) without a twitch. Both Isaac and that fan would have grown up hearing it, would be completely inured to it as a word that carries a powerful message of hate. It’s unlikely both that the fan would use the word as a slur and that Isaac would have such a deeply felt reaction to it. 

and honestly? That did take me out of the scene a little bit. Similar to the S1 episode where Keeley teases Roy about meeting in a “parking lot.” 

however, unlike parking lot which has no place in that dialogue, i fully understand the choice of “the other f-word” over a British slur. The aim of the scene was to provoke a visceral response from viewers, to make them want to get up in that fan’s face the way Isaac did. No British word, however more authentic to the setting and characters, would provoke the necessary reaction from American viewers. Call it linguistic licence, i guess. 

it’s very interesting though how Ted Lasso is set firmly in Britain when it wants to be a fish-out-of-water comedy but can’t be so British that it confuses American viewers. A delicate balance. Jokes about biscuits and tea are a-okay but car park goes a step too far. There’s a linguistics dissertation lurking in there somewhere. 

someone else can write it.