#I’m taking volunteers

[coffentyme]

God I need to be grabbing and grasping at someone’s hips, going to town between their legs like it’s my last fucking breath. Breathless, moan filled gasps leaving their lips as they tell me how I make them feel so good, how I’m doing such a good job for them, to not fucking stop. I don’t need air. I need to make them cum.

[stormywinter42]

Need someone to snuggle with and kiss

[starry-eye]

Need to hold her in my lap while she cums on my strap “feels good huh princess ?” “Just like that” “keep riding my cock baby”

[limn3r]

Good thing is that in Argentina we celebrate it in November so it’s okay guys I still have a chance (no)

[mid0risour]

the way that my job title should just be “babysitter” because these motherfuckers are so childish

[rainbow-femme]

I love reading definitions of Quiet Quitting

“An employee who is quiet quitting will come into work at their allotted start time, do tasks within their job description, leave at their allotted time, take their full lunch break, and fully use their paid time off and sick leave”

[silverhalla]

Back at it again with another theory: What if Lucanis’ betrayal wasn’t a betrayal at all?

(obviously, spoilers below the cut)

During The Wigmaker Job, we have some dialogue between Illario and Lucanis about their position within both the Crows and the Dellamorte family. Illario wants Caterina to step down so he can take the coveted First Talon spot. Lucanis reassures him that his time is coming, to which Illario makes a snide comment about whether his cousin would ever go against their grandmother’s wishes. When they continue the conversation after the job, Illario states that Lucanis is the potential heir, that he’s her favorite, and that he’s unlikely to say no to her. Lucanis doesn’t argue, only insists that he doesn’t want to be First Talon, and that he hopes she’ll see reason before that. It’s mentioned again in Eight Little Talons - Caterina favors Lucanis. It’s well-known enough among the Crows that Viago and Teia discuss it in front of her (not on purpose, but she doesn’t deny it). He’s her prodigy through and through.

In the opening scene for the Lucanis quest in Veilguard, Caterina is poised, as you’d expect of the First Talon. She’s certain that the body they buried wasn’t her grandson, that it had been altered with blood magic. She doesn’t pose it as a theory, though: she poses it as a fact. It could, of course, merely be her confidence, but there’s another very unusual aspect to the scene – everyone else discusses how Lucanis was clearly betrayed, that someone must have sold him out in order for the Venatori to capture him. Caterina is the only one in that room who never speaks on it. She doesn’t ask for justice, doesn’t mention vengeance, never acknowledges that her grandson was sold out by someone he trusted – perhaps because he wasn’t. 

What if, when Caterina comes to him with a plan, with an impossible request, he’s still her favorite prodigal grandchild, and he still does whatever she asks? She’s had him tortured before as a child, has tortured and starved and beaten him herself before, because it makes him stronger and more resistant to it in the future. He says in The Wigmaker Job that he used to hate her for it, but now he understands. He justifies it. All Crows justify it, because they have to - if they don’t, then the cruelty wasn’t for survival’s sake, and their suffering meant nothing. Perhaps he doesn’t even question it. When Caterina tells him that she has a job for him, he takes it. 

What if the contract has a caveat? Sure, Calivan must die by his hand by the end of it, a little treat for a job well done, but what if his primary mission is reconnaissance, is discovery? The Venatori are using blood magic to torture and corrupt prisoners. It would behoove the Crows to find out what it entails and how to resist it, before it’s turned back on them. It would have to be someone so deeply, unabashedly loyal to her that when she asked them to infiltrate a Venatori prison, expecting torture at best, their own death at worst, they’d take the job anyway, no questions asked - someone Caterina can trust, certainly, but also someone who has never once said no to her.

And Lucanis has always been a loyal grandson. 

[stuckinapril]

me stoically navigating my way through drama bc bigger things are ahead and it’s not my fault people are dumb

[shieldmaiden19]

The Bridgerton boys really are all hoes.

Anthony - the ‘so intense it makes him stupid’ hoe

Benedict - the ‘hoe for a good cause’

Colin - the ‘self-absorbed, dumb of ass’ hoe

[wildsaltair]

[fellhellion]

apologies for yosukeposting and especially incoherently but slowboiling in my brain whatever the hell was going on w him in kanji’s dungeon. guy who slingshots between some kinda fraught observation that this is so much worse for kanji because it’s happening in front of an audience (over like. freaking out about it), furiously asserting that he’s heterosexual, insinuating danger but then also being the one who volunteers to take kanji home afterwards.

It’s sooooooooooooooo.

[theridgebeyond]

volunteer job asked if I’d be willing to do a demonstration at a local event so I said “what kind of demonstration” and they said “any demonstration you want :)”

so I asked “can you tell me more about the demonstration? like what is the event looking for?” and they said “we’re so glad you’re doing a demonstration! it’s at Place at Time and usually hundreds of people show up! how cool!”

so I said “I still don’t understand. what kind of demonstration are they looking for. what is expected of me. nothing has been communicated to me. can you communicate to me.” and they said “just do any demonstration you want :)”

[femmeofhearts]

just realized i haven’t been strapped in AT LEAST four months…somebody please help me put an end to this once and for all

[easypeasylindyvesey]

i wanna thank @carolinej1197 for sending me this

[scentedinksandwhackedseals]

my eye (desire to check out a lot of books) is bigger than my stomach (ability/motivation to actually READ all of those books)

[stuckinapril]

Checked in to see Challengers and the ticket collector was like “how old are u” and when I said I was 22 he was like “you look young!!! You look like you’re 17!!!!” I AM young????!!!!??????!?!?!….