#I’m such a fuckup
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over a year clean. and i ruined it all
#i’m such a fuckup#holy shit#vent#vent blog#bpd#bpd feels#tw vent#tw s3lf harm#bpd thoughts#tw s/h#s/h#tw relapse#relapse#s/h relapse#god i wish i could do some lines rn
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Your art’s yummy, Tysm for the meals <33
no thank you lol anyway shout out to the loser parents of all time
#some of my favourite fuckups#using your ask to share a sketch from work lol#lovesong#sparrow oak garcia#nick close#nicky swift#I’m not taging all his names that’s it#my artwork#dndads
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oscar finally got the win he deserved
#f1#formula 1#baku gp 2024#leclerc-s race thoughts#oscar piastri#i mean he apologized after his 1st win because of mclaren’s fuckups#this is the win he very much deserves#i’m so happy for him
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Arent you that guy that burnt their grilled cheese?
So sad
Next time add some BUTTER to that PAN you FUCKING SAVAGE
Thank you, stranger, for helping me learn more about myself
#getting called guy as a trans woman DOES really suck who woulda thought#also#I’m saying this as nicely as I can since I don’t think you had purposefully bad intentions here#we are not friends and you do not know me#I was like let me laugh at myself real quick about the time I was drunkenly making egg on toast in the pan and I was so worried about the#egg when I flipped the bread it was terribly burnt on that one side#notably only that one side I took a picture of#bc I was hammered and talking to a friend the whole time#and just. chances are when something is every day getting closer to 100k notes I’ve already been dunked on enough no?#like do y’all genuinely think you’re above making notable mistakes like that?#because you’re not#and I really wish people wouldn’t act like I’m some sort of invalid because I had#emphasis on the past tense#the good nature to laugh about#my damn fuckup
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house is open.
HOUSE IS OPEN.
(also a member of the crew brought me flowers! 🥹)
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.
#if every single fuckup I’ve ever made this year at work could not come to light all at once#that would be so fucking stellar#😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑#my mental health is really struggling to survive blow after weekly blow#mistakes are normal#but I get marked up on each one and if I have too many at one time that gets me in serious trouble with work#and these are all mistakes I made months and even in one case YEARS ago#this is kind of the fucking worst actually 🥲🥲🥲🥲🥲🥲#talk#vent#ALSO it’s super fucked that this all happens THE MOMENT a position for the promotion I’ve been trying to get for over a year opens up#they never open these positions up for some reason and I was told at the beginning of the year I should be in that position#and then 8 fucking months goes by and they don’t offer a position and then!!!#when they FINALLY DO!!!!#error. error. error. error. error. error.#SO FUCKED UP#I’m so upset#I’ve been crying about this for like a month straight and it doesn’t stop#and I’m not making any NEW mistakes!!!#it’s all shit from earlier this year!!!!#it’s so awful knowing that even if I don’t make a single mistake for a full year moving forward I could still end up with my job on the line#because old shit keeps popping up#it’s a nightmare for real
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I wrote a paper in college for a children’s fantasy class on how PJO handles disability (specifically ADHD and dyslexia) better than almost any other book for kids that tries to be “about” disability. And rereading it now as more of an adult (I think I was 18 when I took that class) I was worried I’d spend the whole time cringing at my past self but like….I was correct and I’m glad I said it. “Your brain is wired differently and just because it’s a benefit in certain situations (fighting monsters or reading Ancient Greek) doesn’t mean it sucks any less the rest of the time. Especially in a world that doesn’t acknowledge the existence of monsters or write anything in Ancient Greek” is a based take on intellectual disabilities that genuinely meant a lot to me as a kid with (undiagnosed) ADHD.
#this is not to absolve ol Rick of criticism for some of the other not great choices made in the book#but like this point specifically is really neat and I think YA authors can and should learn a lot from it#when it comes to making fantasy allegories for the very real issues of their audience#it wasn’t comforting to 8 year old me because ‘oh I’m actually a superhero and these issues are just because no one appreciates me’#it was comforting because it meant I could be an annoying fuckup all day at school#and still be worthy of love and do impressive things and have fun etc etc#and ALSO get cool water powers#percy jackson#percy jackon and the olympians#pjo series#void screams
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ORION CONFIRMED NONBINARY????
#splatoon#splatoon 3#splatbands#chirpy chips#axby#i’m not sure if anyone who got the pre-season update dialogue got this one#but anyways A CHARACTER WAS FINALLY CONFIRMED TO USE THEY/THEM WITHOUT AN NOA FUCKUP
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Study from an old actress’s photo!! But with Linda :•]
#the walten files#twf#Linda thompson#Linda Kranken#twf linda#twf fanart#the walten files fanart#art#digital art#procreate#fanart#doodle#study#was trying to get back into being able to draw well haha#and not draw fuckups and be like omg I suck sm… rrr I’m gonna give up…
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🤡
#I want to kms sincerely 🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡#I’ve been given everything and squandered all of it I’m a loser I’m an idiot I’m an ungrateful fuckup
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the world is infinitely worse off without my friend
#grief#i am sitting in a parking lot crying MAN this year is bad#he was a disaster a mess a fuckup but who cares. he made the world an infinitely better place. most giving person i’ve ever known#it’s also amazing to me how he managed to be an incredibly selfish person but also the biggest support in the world to people he loved. and#the reason I’m saying all this is because if he knew that i was portraying him as some sort of saint now that he’s dead he will rise from#the grave to murder me LMAOOOO he’d tell me to go fuck myself and be honest. so that’s what I’ll do#never have i had someone support me like he did. never. he would go to war with anyone for me. he was there for every decision good and bad#because he knew that the way to get me out of the bad situations was never to turn his back and always support with whatever i needed. and#he was also an incredible sibling. his siblings are so much worse off without him#.txt
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Extremely silly Morrison Disease playlist shaping up:
- Catch My Disease, Ben Lee
- I Don’t Know You Anymore, Savage Garden
- Not Pretty Enough, Kasey Chambers
- The Special Two, Missy Higgins
(Uh. Choices are being made with wangst in mind. Also yes I’m old)
#also yea I’m Australian#Catch My Disease will never not be funny to me as Ben Lee fucked up so hard with that song#joking: they don’t play me on the radio and that’s the way I like it#Triple J: we’ll take that bet and sent it so high commercial radio started playing it too#damn The Special Two is actually so perfect for Dick & Tim as it’s actually a song about sibling relationship fuckups
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Love staying late on one of the worst days I’ve had at my job in the entire year I’ve been there ✌🏻
#god I feel like such a fuckup. and I wouldn’t feel half as bad if it didn’t just impact me#so my boss has to leave 2 hours early now bc her kid just started school#which would be fine if we didn’t have one of our biggest jobs almost at its deadline#and for some!!! fucking reason#that massive job has become MY job. despite me being the junior graphic designer#and so I’m being held to a level of experience I simply don’t have. I’ve never done anything like this before#but every time I fuck up or the document gets fucked up by someone else’s old formatting#or fucking. WHATEVER#it’s all on my head and it fucks over other people in the office#god I feel like the most colossal joke. how did I do four years of school for this#I’m clearly not cut out for it#anyway! do it all again tomorrow I guess!#sun in an empty room
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nvm, I called Ewan Mitchell the Lord of the Rings guy. He’s the Game of Thrones spin off guy. I am so bad at TV. I thought he was Legolas
#Not even my first fuckup of the week if I’m being honest 😭#I asked a Viennese band if they wanted to record a station ID for us… in Austrian. AUSTRIAN. AUSTRIAN LANGUAGE.#that’s what spending 3h in the studio will do to you I guess??#I KNOW THE LANGUAGE IS GERMAN. I knew it was wrong even coming out of my mouth#But by the time I could work out what about that sentence sounded wrong they had already#Probably taken pity on me and kindly done the entire take in German; I had a screamer there#I must’ve sounded the like most uneducated idiot with no exposure to Europe; aaaa#Let me have my moment of shame here. Embarrassing!#Although this story does have a happy ending; I just got back from spending 3 hours with them#And they are very nice to me so I think they gave forgiven/forgotten my moment of idiocy#Anyway. This post was about my Ewan Mitchell fuckup
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I turn 23 in two weeks should I kill myself
#feeling so much despair over the fact that I should have graduated from undergrad this spring#like 4yrs have passed my entire high school class has their degrees now#and I completely wasted my entire life for two years. and look at where that’s gotten me#Jesus fucking christ it’s so over I’m a complete fuckup 👍#sorry I’m having my annual birthday existential crisis avert your eyes
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trying not to anxietypost rn
#hashtag when the positive affirmations do not stop the body-wracking sobs#these are the worst bc they last hours and leave me kinda mentally paralyzed#just spiralling and beating myself up and not being able to stop thinking about my fuckups#and then beating myself up again for not getting up and at least getting other work donr#*done#trying to balance validating my feelings with rational actions#but i was already having a bad week and then a bad morning and now a worse afternoon#and so this attack wasn’t a sudden one it was weeks in the making and i just. i knew. and i couldn’t stop it#and then it’s like bc of the anxiety disorder i can’t gauge how accepting ppl will be when i tell them i fucked up#and i just can’t seem to completely stop crying so i literally can’t move on with my day#and i’m trying to balance between letting myself work through the stress with not indulging in the untrue negative ones#rambling
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