#I’m stressed bc they’re in. a month now like a month from today and I’ll be done

[exopelagic]

i will not panic abt my exams

[ofmermaidstories]

I LOVE HEARING YOU TALK ABOUT STARDEW

If you don't mind me asking, how often do you play stardew valley? do you play at night? with a cup of tea?

please! i am dying to talk about it!!! i tend to play games in solid, obsessed blocks. so i’ve been playing every day for the last couple of weeks, now, but before that it’d been months and months since i touched it last. i’ll play whenever! whenever i have time, or throughout the day if it’s a lazy one. i like to play in stretches, and i consider it a treat to, so i’ll often have a snack ready or a drink (sometimes that cuppa you mentioned, often a juice box tho bc im like, five, lmao). i only have two saves!! my first one, delilah, where i didn’t know what i was doing and got bored of, really quickly—and my current one, my second one! it uses my real name, lmao, which tbh i’m not sure i like—it’s always jarring when the other characters say things to me. 💀 we’re currently in winter, in year five. the farm is called Sea Dreams, and it’s a beach property. i completely ignored the warnings about it not being for beginners lmfao, but i quite like it! beyond the romanticism of being on the beach of this like, inland sea cove, i like that the sand means only a fraction of the land is actually good for proper farming. i use the proper soil, the real soil, for my seasonal crops and then let patches of trees grow throughout the rest of the farm. my fruit trees are near the bat cave; in front of my house i grow small plots of flowers. and then by the shore i keep the animals. i’ve fenced them so they get trees and the pond and the sea as well; if i’m spending the day on the farm i’ll sometimes hear the plop! of the ducks, gliding onto the cove’s waters. they always look so contented. 🥹 if i’m there in the evenings, when it’s time for them to turn into the barn or the coop, i’ll stand on the shore and wait for them to drift back—they’re always last in, on those days.

i have a single fish pond, so far, towards the south of the property—it’s filled with sturgeon and from their eggs i make caviar. i make goats cheese and bread and mayonnaise and at the end of every season i harvest the flowers that grew and ride into town on my horse, grover, and hand them out. in the warm months my farm is covered in grass, everywhere! on the last day of autumn i cut it all down, for hay. my greenhouse is on a little island of it’s own, with grandpa’s shrine behind it: inside i grow more flowers, and fruit trees, and strawberries, blueberries, ancient fruit, starfruit. i hope to get a second mango sapling at some point, to grow in the greenhouse—my first one is now planted among my peach trees, waiting for it’s first summer.

fairy roses are my favourite flower. every autumn, during the stardew fair, i always include a pink one, one of my best, in my grange display for the competition. this year my setup included my best goats cheese; my best, aged wine. my best peach and my best orange! caviar, my fairy rose, a bottle of truffle oil and a jar of fairy rose honey, and then lastly, a tulip from spring, lavender-dawn in colour.

(i always win, and i always feel so smug about it. i hate pierre so much lmao, he’s such a dick.)

hmm, what else can i tell you? i’ve only just made it to the skull caverns! they stress me out so bad. 💀 recently tho (like, today, lmfao), i found my first dinosaur egg! and my first two prismatic shards—i saved the first shard in a chest in my barn, and with the other got a sword. the dinosaur egg is currently incubating! i’m so excited for it to live among my chickens and my ducks and my rabbits. 🥹

i really, really like the magic realism that’s steeped into the valley. beyond the atmosphere of the game (the freedom of leaving behind a life that was stifling you, and finding a home in the valley you’d never even dared dreamed of, before) the magic of the world is like, the number one factor in me wanting to write a AU for it. i like—things like the fairy stones. An old miner's song suggests these are made from the bones of ancient fairies. i like things like finding the burnished copper helmets of the dwarves; i like that we can wear one. i like that sometimes, in the night, there’s a rustle of wings and the next morning when you step outside there’s an owl statue, nestled somewhere on your farm like it’s been there for centuries. there’s a junimo hut in the secret, wooded area of pine trees on my farm. they’re too far from the crops to appear, but sometimes when i ride past in the dusk, just when it’s getting dark, you can hear the flicker of flames—the open doorway to their little home glowing. there’s also a secret altar to yoba, amid the trees; the dull steel of the sign of the vessel hidden away against the dark green. there’s just so much to it! i feel like you could dig deep, go deep, literally deep in the mines, and still not understand the world. and it makes me want to write that, lmao. the whole game just makes me want to write! just the world of it—waking up at six am, every morning. learning how to make something of the land before you, how to grow things, how to care for things, animals. walking into town to buy seeds. galloping into town, or down to the forest. one of my favourite touches, in the game, is how sometimes there’ll be a flock of birds on the path, pecking at something—and when you come along they all take flight, all together. and there’s a moment, every time, where you’re in the middle of it, the the beat of the wings—running or riding with them, almost. that’s what i wanna write about. the ride into town, slipping from the horse, breathless, in front of the general store or the saloon. i haven’t married anyone in my save, yet; i can’t decide on who i want to live with. so many of them are sweethearts. i like elliot a lot, recently. he wrote a romance novel for me. 🥺 but originally i wanted to date alex—i love his grandparents. on the last day of autumn i’ll take my fairy roses into town for his grandmother, and for jasmine. but saying that sebastian’s also grown on me; as has haley. sometimes i think i’ll just ask krobus, deep in his sewer, to move in with me instead—but i have an empty nursery in my house and sometimes i wonder if it’d be fun to have someone to have kids with.

(but then i swing back and forth on it—it creeps me out that the kids never age. 🥹 eternal toddlers, stumbling around the house. maybe i’ll have them just to see what it’s like, and then go to the witch’s hut to turn them into doves and let them go.)

if i wrote a stardew valley AU for my hero, i think it’d be just as hard to pick an endgame in-fic. do we pick izuku, and his rabbits? or bakugou and his explosions, up in the quarry? shouto, following us from the city, trying to leave behind the massive corporation that’s eating the world up that he’s set to inherit? idk! anyways. that’s off-topic. 🥹 do you play, anon??? what’s your favourite part? what’s your farm like???? do you like to have a cuppa in hand, when you settle in to play?

[kireimarkeu]

To You; l.dh

+another repost! did not make any changes to this work :) p.s this is one of my fav fics i have written :)

summary; bored in quarantine, your boyfriend decides to film himself telling you how much he loves you.

3k words

this was like… ½ edited LMFAO so there might,,, be mistakes…??? this was so tiring to make omfg, enjoy!! lol 

also i mixed the name donghyuck and haechan bc i couldn’t choose one lmfao ok!!! bye gn enjoy!! :)))))))

warnings: there’s a word f*t in it

+Day 1 3:34PM

Haechan adjusted the camera, making sure he could be seen. Once he was sure the camera was reflecting him properly, he leaned back against his gaming chair. 

“Um,” your boyfriend started, looking everywhere but the camera. “This is awkward,” he says, looking back at the camera.

“I started this, since we won’t be able to see each other for a month- because of quarantine,” he explains, “I honestly have no idea what I’m doing right now,” he laughs. 

After a few minutes of pure silence, your boyfriend opened his mouth to continue speaking, “I just feel like— I never really show much love to you?” 

There were times where your boyfriend would purposely avoid saying ‘I love you’ or avoid holding your hands whenever the both of you were outside. Honestly, you didn’t really mind, knowing Donghyuck was never the type to show affection. 

“It’s hard,” he says truthfully, “The boys knows how much I love you, and it sucks that I don’t know how to show you— or tell you, that I love you.”

Haechan bit his lips nervously, “and, I think this video is- or will prove that I love you?”

He wasn’t sure if he was even making sense at this point. 

Your boyfriend groaned, throwing his head back, covering his face with his hands. After a while, he looked back at the camera, “you know what, babe? Just watch the whole thing, okay?”

+Day 4 11:47PM

“Hi,” he smiles, letting out a huff, “this is kinda late, I spent the whole night playing games,” he says guiltily, playing with his fingers, looking away from the camera.

He knows that you didn’t like it when he would stay up until ungodly hours just to play games with his friends. You hated how he would put his health aside just to play games. 

He brings his hands up to brush his wet hair. 

“Uh,” he sighs out loud, pouting. “I feel bad for staying up late last night, so I’m going to spend the whole night with you today,” he laughs. 

Another moment of silence pass. 

“I don’t know what to say,” he whines. 

He sat there in silence, staring at the ground, figuring out on what to say. Should he tell you about his day?

“Well, I woke up at 5PM today,” he tells you, “I ate dinner with my family— mom cooked chicken today!” he says happily, “Then, I went to call you for a bit because I missed you a little too much,” he pouts. 

He scratched his head, “then I showered and now this-“ he says, pointing to the camera. 

“Um, it has been 4 days and I miss you too much,” he says truthfully, “facetiming isn’t working, I think I’m going crazy,” he laughs. 

+Day 5 7:38PM

He was talking halfway, talking about how much he admires you when his phone started ringing. 

“Oh?” he turns around to grab his phone from his bed. A smile formed on his face when he saw you facetiming him. 

He turned to the camera to show his screen, “Baby, you’re calling me,” he giggles before quickly answering to your facetime. 

“Channie~” you whine cutely when your boyfriend answered your facetime, “what are you doing, hyuckie?”

Usually, your boyfriend would complain whenever you would speak in a cute voice, but he secretly likes it. He secretly likes being babied. 

He looks at the camera that was recording the both of you. 

“Nothing,” he lies, “why did you call me, loser?”

You huff, raising your arms so he could see you laying on the bed. “I’m bored, hyuckie~ entertain me~”

He leans back on his chair, “wanna play games with me?”

Your face beam at his words, “Okay! I’ll get my X-Box ready now.”

Your boyfriend was the one who bought for you the X-Box. Well, it was an old version, but you loved it, nonetheless. It wasn’t like you played daily— you only played with boyfriend. 

“I’ll call you in 5, baby,” he tells you, already walking over to turn on the tv. 

“Kay, bye-bye, love you, Hyuckie,” you say in a baby voice, bringing your phone closer to press your lips on the camera. 

Donghyuck scrunched his nose in disgust, “yeah, yeah,” he says before ending the call. 

He quickly grab the camera that was still recording, he moved the camera closer to press a kiss, “I love you too, y/n.”

+Day 7 3:01PM

“Do you remember when you gave me the teddy bear— Oh my gosh, I feel like a youtuber,” he cackles. He shook his head, focusing back to what he was saying. 

“So, do you remember when you gave me the teddy bear?” he asks, “wait,” he says, standing up to grab the tiny teddy bear that was sitting on his bed. 

You had bought him the bear during your 200th day with him. Donghyuck didn’t really give the reaction you wanted. 

“Do you not like it?” you had asked him, disappointment laced in your voice. You didn’t dare look at him, upset with yourself that you had bought something that he didn’t like. 

“No, no!” he quickly replied, wrapping an arm around your shoulder to pull you into his chest, the other holding the tiny bear. “I love it,” he says. 

You knew it was a lie. He didn’t seem to like it. 

“I love it,” he says, “I know I didn’t show like I did at that time, but I need it with me every time I go to bed.” 

He scratches his head, regretting his actions that has had happened months ago. 

“No one has ever bought me a bear before,” he explains, “and when you bought it for me, it just felt— I felt, I felt happy? I felt fulfilled? Do you know what I mean?” 

“I really wanted to tell you that I loved your present, especially when you had bought me another present a few days later,”

‘it was to make up for the previous present’ was your reason. 

It broke his heart when you said that while handing him a couple bracelet. He wanted to tell you how much he loved your gift, but it was so hard for him. 

“I hated myself for not being able to tell you the truth, it’s hard—and it still is,” he sighs, “I hope by doing this, I can assure you that I love you..?” 

+Day 10 9:34PM

He was in the middle of filming himself when his mother comes in. 

“Donghyuck-ah, what are you doing? Do you want some fruits?” his mother asks, looking at his son, not noticing the camera perched on the dressing table. 

Instead of answering his mother’s question, he grabs the camera to film his mother. 

“Eomma, say hello to y/n,” Donghyuck says. 

His mother raised her eyebrows in surprised, “hello my dear y/n~ how are you?”

Your boyfriend giggle from behind the camera, “tell her how much you miss her,”

“I think I miss you more than Donghyuck does,” she jokes. “What is this for, Donghyuck-ah?”

Haechan placed the camera back on the dressing table, turning to look at his mum.

“I’m making a video for y/n until quarantine is over,” he explains as his mother walks in, wrapping her arm around her son’s shoulder. 

His mother’s heart warmed at his son’s words. 

“You’re growing up way too fast, our Donghyuck~” she cooed, pulling your boyfriend’s cheeks as he whined in pain. 

You would also pinch his cheeks almost every time the both of you are together. Whenever you had Donghyuck’s cheeks between your fingers, he would whine, pulling away from your grip.

“Eomma! I want strawberries!” he shouts after his mother left his room. 

He turns his attention back to the camera, “Anyways—”

+Day 17 2:35AM

“I really like your eyes,” Haechan confesses dreamily, “your eyes are the colour of shit,” he jokes, “but they’re so shiny, baby,”

The first time he realizes he’s in love with your glimmering eyes was when he brought you out on a date to star gaze. You were staring at the sky, a smile plastered on your face, amazed at how beautiful the sky was. 

When you noticed your boyfriend staring at you, you turned to face him. Your eyes captured his heart. How could someone have such bright eyes?

“Oh! And when you smile, you make my heart beat like crazy!” he chuckles. 

The first thing that caught Hyuck’s eyes when he had a crush on you was your bright smile. He believes that was the main reason that he fell for you. How you would always have a beaming smile plastered on your face everywhere you go. 

He thinks it’s adorable. 

The small dimples that was on the side of your lips whenever you smile. 

And your adorable little laugh he adores so much. 

Or the little birthmark you had on the corner of your mouth. 

After talking about you for a while, he let out a satisfied sigh, “I’m so whip for you, you know?”

After 17 days of making videos for you, it started becoming easier for him to show his love for you. 

“Everything you do makes me go crazy, do you realise that?” he asks you, “do you realize that everything you do makes me happy? No, you don’t have to do anything, your presence makes me melt.”

He laughs at how he was flirting, “you’re probably laughing too,”

His laughter died down, letting out a tired sigh, “well, it’s late and I’m going to go to bed before you nag at me some more,”

He let out a yawn, “goodnight y/n, I love you so much, you don’t know how happy you make me,”

+Day 20 2:56PM

This time, it was different. 

He was filming himself at McDonalds drive-thru. 

“Guess who’s this for?” he asks the camera, his gaze on the road. “Yes, you.”

He turns to look at the camera for a second before paying attention on the road, “you didn’t ask me to get you anything but I wanted to get something for you,” he explains. 

He was lying, this was just an excuse to see you, even for a second. Even if it’s 6 feet apart. Even if there was a glass between the both of you. 

“I think you know the reason why I’m buying this for you,” he says, referring to the food. “To make you fat! You’re right, y/n,” he jokes. 

That was also a lie. You tend to eat less whenever you’re stressed. 

After he found out that you had a project, he knew how stress you would be, and decided to get food, making sure you eat healthily. 

Your boyfriend would never fail to remind you how much he loves your body. No matter shape or size. He has always made sure you feel loved with who you are. 

“I think you know the real reason why I’m coming over,” he adds. When he reaches a red light, he turns to look at the camera with a pout, “I can’t help it, I miss you too much, y/n,” he says in a baby voice. 

He grimaces at his actions, shaking his head disapprovingly, “I am never doing that ever again.”

A few minutes later, he reached your house. He had texted you to that he was waiting for you outside. 

It took you a while to come out, but when you did, you had one of his hoodies over your body. 

He loves it when you wear his clothes, it makes him feel all giddy. 

‘One day, I’m going to wear all of your clothes’ he would say whenever you steal his clothes. 

You walked over to his car, “what the hell are you doing here, dummy,” you ask him, maintaining the distance. 

He grabbed the bag of food from the passenger’s seat and passed it to you from the window of his car. 

“Brought you food, you unappreciative bitch,” he tells you while you walk up to grab the food from him. 

You open the bag to see your favourite food, “my favourite food, too?!” you squeal, “Haechan best boyfie~”

He rolls his eyes, “yeah, yeah, go and finish your project,”

You nodded, the smile not leaving your face. 

“I’ll facetime you later?” he asks. 

“At 11,” you confirmed. 

He nods, signalling for you to go back in. You blow a kiss to your boyfriend before turning around to go back in. 

He quickly fishes out his camera, filming you walking back in your house. 

“Look at my baby all happy because I brought her food,” he says, “enjoy your food, pretty,”

+Day23 6:07PM

“Day 23,” he breathes out. “I didn’t expect it to go by so fast,” he blurts out. 

He puffs his cheeks out, “I don’t want to stop making videos for you, but you would just make fun of me for being soft,”

He had started growing content on making videos for you every day. 

“But at the same time, I can finally see you after a month, babe!” he says happily. “I can finally hold you in my arms, we can kiss until the world ends, we can also do it,” he says, wiggling his eyebrows. 

Well, he can’t lie he did miss doing it with you. 

He sighs, “anyway, when we can finally get together, we can watch movies, then come back to my place and we can cuddle!”

He missed that. 

Personally, Donghyuck preferred going over to your place but you preferred going to his place because he had games and a huge bed, and it was just comfortable. 

“Ahh,” he groan, “I miss you like crazy! I think I have to end this video early because I wanna facetime you right now,”

He grabs his phone on the table to call you. 

“Okay, bye babe, I love you, I’m going to talk to you now!”

+Day 25 4:03AM

“Hi,” donghyuck greet the camera. 

Anyone could realise he wasn’t in the best mood. 

It took Donghyuck a while to start talking, “we had a fight earlier today,” he says, his voice lace with disappointment and… hurt?

You had texted him just an hour ago, ranting about your homework. When Donghyuck replied to you a minute later, you got angry at him because he was staying up again at ungodly hours. 

He didn’t understand why you were so angry because you were awake at the same timing as he is. 

“I’m going to give you space, because it’s what you need right now,” he says. “I hope you know I still love you no matter what,”

He bit his lip hesitantly, “I know you don’t like it when I stay up with the boys, but I don’t like you staying up to finish your work either, baby”

He closes his eyes shut for a moment, taking a deep breath. “I hope you don’t get too stressed over school, eat healthily, and make sure you rest from time to time, babygirl,”

He lets out another sigh before reaching for the camera, “I love you,”

+Day 28 7:36PM

 Haechan purses his lips, staring at the camera, “today is a bad day,” he starts. 

Today he had woke up a little earlier than normal after talking it out with you a few days ago. He decided to get up early and help his mom with cooking, which only resulted him in getting scolded by his mother for making a mess. 

After that, he decided to play games with his friends, however despite playing for 5 hours straight, he didn’t get a single win. 

Now, he has tried to contact you, but you have not replied to him. Probably busy with school. 

He let out a huff, “take a break y/n,” he whines, “focus on me too~”

Letting out a pout he shakes his head, “kidding babe, get those A’s!”

“Well, now I don’t really have anything to do so I’m going to facetime you again, bye babe!”

+Day 30 10:18AM

“Hyuckie!” you call out, running to your boyfriend. When you reached him, you threw your arms around your boyfriend’s neck, making him stumble back a few steps as he grabs on your waist. 

You hid your face in his neck, breathing in his scent. He smells so good.

“You’re not going to let go of me until I say so,” you mumble, tightening your grip around his neck.

He chuckles at you, “I won’t let go of you until you say so,” 

Donghyuck was satisfied with having his arms wrapped around your waist, his face covered in your hair. 

After a few moments of the both of you just holding each other, you finally pull away from your boyfriend. 

“Y/n,” he says, making you hum.

“Wait,” you stop him, making him stare at you with wide eyes as he froze on the spot. 

“Can you kiss me first?” you ask. His eyes soften at your request. Your fingers trace his bottom lips, “I miss your pretty lips.”

He smiles at your words and nodded. Pulling you closer by your waist, he pressed his lips against yours. Your hands rest on his chest while you both share a needy kiss. 

After a few minutes, you pull away, breathless with crimson red cheeks.

Haechan raised his eyebrows as he resumed, “I made something for you,”

You gasped, “what is it?”

He fishes out a CD player. The CD held videos of him explaining how much he loves and appreciates you throughout the whole month. 

He passes you the gift. 

“Watch this at home?” he tells you. 

You grab the CD from his grip, “okay? What is this all about?”

“Just promise me you’ll watch it at home?” he asks again, staring down at you. 

“I will! I will!” 

After making videos of himself for 29 days straight, Donghyuck have concluded that he was so utterly in love with you. He was so in love with you that he didn’t know how to express how much he adores you.

[satendou]

⟼  the symbol for love

⟼ the language of flowers | next

・‥…━━━━━━━☆☆━━━━━━━…‥・

⇢ pairing: akaashi/reader

⇢ au: florist!akaashi, college!au

⇢ summary:  akaashi’s love language is that of flowers

⇥  masterlist

⇢  warnings: mutual pining, flowers, soft smut

⇢  word count: 8.3k

・‥…━━━━━━━☆☆━━━━━━━…‥・

⇢  a/n: okay full disclosure, this fic only exists bc @keijiskitten​ sent in a picture of akaashi surrounded by flowers at the same time that i was talking about a roommate au. we talked more about it and she suggested confessing via flowers and i went overboard with it. this is another one i’m rather fond of and was written mostly with her in mind. so thank her for the idea!

It started off with heather, hyacinths, and jasmine.

Opening the door to the apartment you had been sharing with one Akaashi Keiji for the last seven months, you were hit with the delicate bouquet of fresh flowers, purple and blue and white, all artfully arranged in a vase on the coffee table. 

“Ah, those are so pretty, Akaashi,” you murmured to the man reading a book on the couch. It was a battered copy of 10,000 Leagues Under the Sea by Jules Verne and he was already halfway through it. The TV played a black and white movie, the volume turned so low you could hear only the soft crackle of sound playing through the speakers. “What are they?”

Occupied with taking off your shoes, you missed the faint pink dust that crept over his cheeks at your praise. By the time you turned back around, it had disappeared. He had closed the book and pulled the vase closer to him, slender fingers pulling three different stems out of the container and laying them across his palm.

“Heather,” he said, handing you the purple flower. “Jasmine.” The white one was handed to you. “And lastly, hyacinths.” The final blue flower was handed over, and you held them to your nose, inhaling deeply. Your eyes fluttered and a soft smile crossed your lips as you looked over them at him.

“And what do these mean?” you asked, a teasing edge to your voice. Akaashi was both a book and flower lover, so you knew that there were meanings behind the bouquet, right down to the number of flowers. “They smell so sweet.”

Akaashi chuckled at that. He always loved your reactions to his arrangements. They were so pure and genuine, like the flowers he handled on a daily basis, and oh so fragile. Over the course of the last few months, he had picked up on your habits and emotions, noting each time you felt anxious you would pick at the skin of your lips and run your fingers through your hair, or how when you were feeling extra tired you would just throw your hair up in a messy bun or a ponytail and go about your business. His favorite by far though was when you were relaxed and at ease-- when your face would soften, your eyes would brighten, and you would look at him with a smile that squeezed his heart.

“They were for a customer today and I just liked the arrangement,” he answered, and the lie tumbled from his lips with such ease that it almost scared him. “But they mean beauty and solitude, love, and playful and sincere.” He pointed out each flower as he spoke its meaning, in the order that he had handed them to you, resisting the urge to graze his fingers across your knuckles.

He caught the flustered glint in your eyes as you stared at them and smiled in response. That was the look he adored and he worked his hardest to bring it out as often as possible, especially lately. Finals were coming up and he had never seen you more stressed and harried, staying out and up late studying or finishing assignments. The bags under your eyes caused him some concern, and he did his best to help you with things, but with a flower shop to run it wasn’t easy.

“Did you have any plans tonight? We could order in, if you want,” he offered, and hoped that the desire was well hidden from his voice. It was the weekend, and usually you spent Friday nights with your friends. That didn’t stop him from asking, though.

“Oh I’m sorry, I have a group project I have to work on,” you answered, and handed back the flowers that were still clasped in your hands. “I only came home to change and then I’m leaving.”

His heart fell, but he managed to keep his face straight. “Oh okay. I’ll see you later?”

“Uh, well I don’t know how late I’ll be, so don’t wait up,” you answered, your face the embodiment of apologetic. You wanted so badly to take him up on it, to get a break from the grueling hours of endless work, but the project needed to be handed in on Monday and no one wanted to be working on it all weekend-- not when there was studying and other assignments to be completed.

He could see the weariness on your face and took your hand in his, feeling his heart stutter when you squeezed back. Giving you a small smile, he said, “You can do this. Just a few more weeks and you’ll have a break. Just hang in there.”

“I know,” you said as you moved away from him, walking down the hall towards your bedroom. “Thank you for supporting me, ‘Kaashi. It means a lot.”

Then you were out of sight, the bedroom door closing with a soft click behind you and Akaashi was left staring at the flowers that spelled out all of the emotions he himself couldn’t express.

--

Two weeks later, you came into the apartment after a day full of nothing but stressful exams and irritable professors. On top of that, your thesis topic had been denied and you were more than a little anxious about trying to find a new one.

As observant as ever, Akaashi picked up on your mood the moment you texted him and frowned, looking at the bouquet he was currently working on. It was massive, standing taller than him and bursting with colors of all sorts. All of them symbolized love, cherishment, and a hope for the future. It was the final order for a wedding but he couldn’t care less about it all of a sudden.

Sending you a short message back, he returned to it, eyebrows now furrowed in concentration over on a different train of thought. Wracking his brain as best he could, he finished the arrangement up and called one of his employees to take it to the back, where it would be loaded up and taken to the venue. 

He helped put up the flowers on display in the coolers and then shooed the others out of the shop, flipping the sign on the door to ‘closed’. Moving into the back of the now empty shop, he pondered the flowers in stock, pinching delicate petals between his fingers as he went over the meanings for each.

Love, good health, solitude, remembrance-- it was easy for him to recall each, and he smiled as he landed on the ones he wanted. With a grace and quickness honed by years of practice, he put a small bouquet together, hoping that this small token would bring you some comfort.

And if that didn’t work, takeout from your favorite place probably would.

--

The door opened two hours after you had first texted Akaashi telling him your bad news. The response you had received had been lackluster, further souring your mood, and you were currently sprawled out on the couch moping with a mug of his tea.

Raising your brow at the way he held his hand behind his back, you took the bag he offered, instantly recognizing your favorite smells wafting from it. Your stomach grumbled, and you offered him a repentant smile because you knew he now knew you had neglected to eat that day.

Instead of saying anything about it, he just frowned before showing you what was behind his back, setting it on the table beside the bag, and your face lit up.

Pink, purple, and white seemed to pop in comparison to the rest of the room, vibrant and fresh, and you reached out, pulling one of each flower from the vase. The food sat forgotten on the table for the time being as you inhaled the blooms’ scents before offering them to him.

“Well, what are they and what do they mean?” you asked, and he chuckled at the enthusiasm written across your face. Over the last few weeks, it had become something of a ritual for him to bring home a few flowers for you, laying them on the coffee table for you to find when you got home from a late night study session or handing them to you as he left for work in the morning. 

It was hard not to appreciate how invested you seemed to be in it, and he tried hard not to read too much into it. That was far easier said than done though, especially when your eyes lit up with wonder and happiness, looking first at the flower and then at him. It was the biggest reason he did it, but it left him feeling empty in some ways, wondering if you would look at him the same way if he didn’t bring them to you.

Still, he wouldn’t stop-- even that little bit of attention meant something to him, so he took the flowers you now offered from your hands and spun the purple one between his slender fingers. 

“Violets mean peace, or in this case relaxation,” he said, and immediately caught the understanding dawning on your face. By the time he explained the meaning behind the peonies-- good fortune or luck-- it had morphed into something so unbearably soft that his insides twisted into knots that would never come undone. 

“And the jasmines mean-- love,” you said, and your expression morphed into confusion as you took them back from him.

“W-Well, in this case they’re just for optimism and good fortune. I guess a different flower would have been better--”

--but any other wouldn’t have meant the same thing.

He cursed himself for being so obvious and swallowed nervously, waiting for your response. In another situation, he might have said the look that flashed across your pensive face was disappointment, but he was sure he was just deluding himself. 

And sure enough, your lips curled up into your usual smile as you thanked him for the flowers, support, and, most importantly, food.

The relief was tempered by disappointment that you accepted his lie so easily before he launched into a lecture about how you should take better care of yourself and threatened to come to the campus and drag you off to lunch himself if he had to. The living room was filled with banter while you ate, suggesting maybe you wouldn’t mind him coming and kidnapping you for lunch if he would take you to your favorite restaurant. Of course he promised he would because that just meant he’d get to spend even more time with you and you didn’t look the least bit unhappy with the development. He tried to ignore the nervous fluttering in his stomach as you planned to meet at the restaurant around one.

That night, you stayed in with him watching old movies that he knew you didn’t like, sharing a blanket thrown across your legs, but he appreciated the way you kept picking them anyway. The flowers were moved to the kitchen counter, illuminated by the overhead light, and more than once he caught you looking at them with a soft, wistful sort of smile.

--

The first lunch date was followed by several more over the coming weeks, whenever the gap in your schedule coincided with his lunch break. Of course, he could take lunch whenever he wanted, being the owner, but Akaashi was nothing if not a courteous boss and chose not to do that to his employees.

Today you were running late, and your order had just arrived when you flung yourself into your seat, out of breath and grinning maniacally. It was the look you usually wore when something had both gone your way and was going to surprise him and it didn’t fail this time either.

“I got a fucking S, ‘Kaashi!” you said, slamming the paper down on the table between you. His eyes widened and you practically glowed at the stunned expression. It made his blue eyes sparkle, and when he looked up at you there was such pride in them that your heart skipped a beat.

“_____, that’s amazing,” he said, picking up the paper to examine it. It was littered with your handwriting, each answer meticulously thought out and he could even see some of his influence in your answers-- certain things worded certain ways or words he had said repeated in ink. There was something about knowing you listened to his advice that closely that made him anxious, and he couldn’t decide if it was in a good way or a bad way. “I’m so proud of you.”

This test had been weighing heavy on you for a month, and most of your focus was on passing it, since it was your worst subject. It was too important to fail, and you had stayed up late into the night working on your problem areas, with Akaashi coming in clutch with advice and explanations-- and coffee-- when you needed it.

A flood of adoration swept through you as you stared at your pretty roommate. He was the picture of calm, a gentle smile on his face as he gazed back at you, grey-blue eyes narrow with what you guessed was contentment.

Suddenly, this felt a lot less platonic than it had originally, and you tucked your hair behind your ear as you cleared your throat. You couldn’t go down that line of thinking, it would only lead to disappointment. No way was this gorgeous man interested in a stressed out, exhausted, anxious mess of a college student and you wouldn’t let yourself get your hopes up. 

“A lot of it was because of you, you know,” you said, schooling your expression into what you hoped was grateful and not at all nervous. He didn’t react other than a widening of his smile and a curious quirk of his eyebrow, so you assumed you had managed it. “I mean it. You explain things so well, it’s easy to understand. And you’re patient, even though you had to explain things to me like a hundred times. I would definitely have failed without you.”

His eyes widened again in surprise, his lips parting as if to say something, but nothing came out. Instead, he looked contemplative, a myriad of emotions swimming through his eyes but you couldn’t pick out any one in particular. At the end though, you thought there might have been something akin to melancholy as he looked down at his yet untouched food, tea long since gone cold.

Before you could ponder that, his expression settled back into the placid calm you were accustomed to and he said, “No, I think you could have done it. You put so much effort into studying, I thought you were going to pass out mid-exam. How many do you have left now?”

The conversation veered off into the rest of your exams and plans for the break in a week’s time-- of which you were unsure, since you had a few offers for vacations and trips-- as you ate.

The rest of the day passed by in a blur of papers, pens, and faces, and you were relieved to finally unlock the door to your apartment. Akaashi had texted you earlier saying he was going to be out late and you had slumped in disappointment, already wondering what you were going to do all alone that night.

But when you opened the door, you perked back up almost immediately.

Sitting on the coffee table was the vase, containing an iris, a yellow rose, and another white jasmine. In it was a note written in perfect, crisp cursive--

‘Blue Iris--faith. Yellow rose-- congratulations. I always knew you could do it, _____.’

For some reason, you couldn’t stop from plucking the jasmine.

--

Finals flew by in what felt like a whirlwind of late nights, coffee, and ink smudges. Every day brought tests, but every evening brought you a new flower and you were running out of space for them. 

Irises, yellow roses, red mums, tiger lilies, and peonies were taking up every ounce of excess space you had and your room smelled like a garden. You couldn’t be happier, either. Akaashi seemed to have a sixth sense for what you needed on any given day and you always looked forward to getting home.

On the final day of your exams there was another round of irises, roses, and jasmines waiting for you, and as you twisted the stem of the white flower between your fingers, you were tempted to ask why this particular flower always found its way into his bouquets. But a bigger part of you didn’t want to know, wanted to let it remain a sweet mystery in case he decided to stop. You knew why you wanted to let it be-- you were afraid that asking would lead to an answer you didn’t want, and the hope you harbored was a pleasant pain.

“So,” Akaashi asked, breaking your pondering, “have you decided what you’re doing for the break?” You were staring far too hard at the fresh white jasmine and jumped when he spoke, making him chuckle. 

You hummed in response, tucking the flower back into the vase on the counter and then looked over to him, perched on the stool beside yours. There was a book, another Jules Verne novel, sitting in front of him, a bookmark hanging out of the top. Resting your head on your arms, you said, “Yeah. A few of my friends decided to go to the beach, so I’m gonna go with them. I’ll be gone for a few days.”

“You don’t sound too happy about that,” he said, mimicking you. The air conditioner clicked on overhead and you shrugged. He tried to ignore the dull throbbing of his heart, wishing he could go with you. But not only had you not invited him, he also had no one to watch the store for him. “Do you not want to go?”

“It isn’t that,” you answered, but it was sort of a lie. You did want to go, to relax and have some fun, and you deserved that. But then why did you feel sad that you were leaving? You already knew, as you and Akaashi stared at each other, that it was him. Even for just a few days, you would miss him terribly, and he wasn’t even yours to miss. Sad, really, how pathetic you felt. “I just...I don’t know. There’s gonna be so many people and it’s gonna be loud and I just want to relax.”

“Then tell them you don’t want to go.” It was selfish, but he couldn’t stop the words from spilling out. It managed to draw a grin out of you, even though you still shook your head.

“I’ve already committed. And besides, it’s only for a few days. Then I’ll come back and not do anything for the next week,” you said, and Akaashi chuckled. 

“Well,” he said as he sat up, and you automatically followed suit, “we should eat so you can pack, since I’m sure you haven’t even started.”

Groaning, you hid your face in your hands, but you couldn’t help the smile. “Don’t call me out. I’ve been doing everything perfectly for the last month, I deserve to slack off a little.”

Akaashi was already scrolling through DoorDash on his phone and laughed again. “Of course you do, but don’t complain to me about it when you’re up at 5am packing.”

“Oh, I will. Because you’ll already be up anyway. I don’t know how you do it,” you said, staring at the flowers once more. You didn’t even bother to ask Akaashi what he was ordering because he knew you like the back of his hand, and whatever he got would be something you liked. 

He hummed in response, placing his order before looking at you. “Wanna watch a movie? Unless you have something else planned?”

But you shook your head and his heart fluttered. 

“Nah, a movie sounds great.”

--

It was only a week, he kept telling himself. And yet he missed you to the point he was almost moping. The apartment still smelled of all the flowers he had filled it with over the last few weeks, but it was fading fast without you to bring new ones home too. He shook his head at his ridiculous train of thought. It wasn’t like you were gone forever, you were still coming home in just a few days.

And he wasn’t sure if it helped that you were constantly blowing up his phone. Pictures and videos of tidepools, fish in the aquarium you had visited, sunsets on the water, and meals with your friends flooded his inbox and he eagerly scanned each one, drinking in your content smile.

But even through a picture, he could see something was missing from it. He knew you too well and looked way too hard not to notice, but he couldn’t quite put his finger on what it was. At least until one video in particular of you in what he recognized as a botanical garden-- the high, domed ceiling made of glass and the condensation obscuring his view of the sky, not to mention the plants literally everywhere gave it away. You were staring down at a box full of white flowers, but were too far away for him to recognize them until whoever was holding the camera got closer.

A male voice called out to you, amused and maybe a little condescending if Akaashi had to say so, asking, “Hey, _____, watcha lookin’ at?”

You visibly jumped in the frame and cast your friend a nervous smile before it cleared up, and in that moment the something Akaashi hadn’t seen in any other picture showed up, just before you reached out and grazed one of the dewy white petals.

Jasmine, he thought, at the same time that you said it. Heat rushed from his ears down to his toes and back up as he recognized the adoration and unadulterated happiness in your smile, and not even the camera-wielder’s derisive laugh could quell the feeling.

“You and your plants. Well, what’s this one mean then?”

If you noticed the tone, you didn’t show it, only standing up straight and putting your finger up in the air as if giving him a lesson as you said, “Jasmine stands for optimism, good fortune, and positive energy. And--”

Love, Akaashi thought, once again at the same time you said it, and he had to sit down at the counter as his nerves got the best of him. He couldn’t take it, the way you stared into the camera with a sharp, knowing look, like you were piercing right into his soul. If his game was given away, then so be it, he was going to confess properly instead of hiding behind his flowers.

Your friend laughed again, and this time Akaashi could see the way you flinched and rolled your eyes, walking away as he mocked you.

“Sure, sure. You really believe in that? Sounds corny if you ask me,” he said, voice crackly through the speaker as the sprinklers came on. He cursed and the video quickly cut out afterwards, probably to protect it from water damage.

Akaashi rewatched that video three more times before finally sending you a text telling you he was flattered that you remembered so much of his ramblings. Laughing, he set his phone down and carded his fingers through his hair, hiding his face in his arms as he thought about what he was planning to do and the ramifications. Was there any way he could salvage it if you rejected him? Was it even worth the risk right now?

There was no answer to his anxious questions, so he did what he always did when he needed something to occupy his mind-- he arranged flowers.

A couple of hours later, your phone pinged with a new alert, and you swiped it open absently as you sipped at a pina colada, almost choking on it when the picture loaded.

Pink, white, and blue all mixed together in an explosion of color on what you guessed was his workbench at the shop. It was one of his most elegant bouquets yet, at least as far as you were concerned, and your curiosity was white hot as you texted him.

‘what are they, kaashi? what do they mean?’

You waited impatiently for him to answer, but he never did, not even reading it. You were a flurry of nerves all that night, warring between calling him, texting him, and just leaving it be. So distracted were you that you lost count of how many drinks you’d had, until you and the rest of your friends were so far gone the bartender cut you off and you made your way up to your rooms to pass out.

You had never been happier to be going home than you were that morning, hungover and still without an answer from your roommate.

--

Unfortunately, you made a mistake on the drive home. Still distracted by your anxious energy, you scrolled through your phone, liking and commenting on things absently while you listened to your friends chatter in the backseat.

Suddenly, a hand was on your shoulder and a rough voice was in your ear, asking “Do you want to go, _____?”

Not thinking much of it, you agreed, checking your texts again just to see if he’d even read the few you’d sent-- nothing, and you went from worried to hurt. Why had he sent you that picture and then just ignored you afterwards? He was still active on Twitter and Instagram, so you knew he hadn’t fallen off his step stool at the shop. What was his deal?

Your apartment building came into view at last, and your heart picked up speed. It was the weekend, he should be home at this hour. What was he going to say? Or do? You had never been so nervous to get home-- or go home-- as you were just then, but a hand on your wrist stopped you.

Looking to your friend, Eiji, you found him looking at you expectantly. 

“I’ll wait for you here, alright? Don’t keep me waiting,” he said, and laughed at the puzzled expression on your face. “You forget already, _____? You agreed to a date. But I figured you’d want to change before we went so…”

“Oh, uh, right,” you said, wracking your brain for when the hell you had agreed to that. His question from earlier drifted through your thoughts, and you could have smacked yourself for being so oblivious. It felt rude to just...change your mind right then, so you braced yourself to suffer through the date. Eiji was nice enough, if not a little pretentious. Nothing like Akaashi-- 

But you decided not to go down that path.

Grabbing your bag from the trunk, you raced up the steps to the apartment as fast as you could, missing the lock at least twice with how bad your hands were shaking. Flinging the door open, you startled Akaashi, who was sitting on the couch staring at yet another bouquet of flowers.

You stood staring at him, and him back at you, with wide, nervous eyes, neither of you saying anything for a moment, until--

“Welcome home.”

The irritation that had been building all day simmered over as you realized he had actually been ignoring you for no good reason, and then had the audacity to act like everything was fine.

“Hey.”

He didn’t miss the cool edge to your greeting as you wandered towards your room with your bag, sparing the vase on the table the smallest glance. The door closed behind you and you dropped your bag beside the closet, trying to ignore the anger and hurt flowing through you. Your head was starting to hurt again and you really just wanted to lay down for a nap, but your phone dinged, lighting up with Eiji’s name, asking how much longer you were going to be.

Ignoring the temptation to cancel-- you really didn’t want to be rude-- you hurriedly changed into something more appropriate and combed through your hair. Scrunching your nose, you winced at the sunburn you could feel covering your face, wondering how you had gotten it even with your religious use of sunscreen.

Akaashi was still sitting on the couch, the book he had been reading closed on his lap as he stared at the bouquet on the table. When you came into the living room, he perked up, a nervous smile coming onto his face.

“Hey, I wanted to talk-- Are you going somewhere?” He had just realized you had changed into a new outfit and there was a restless energy in the way you checked your phone. You had just gotten home, but you were already ready to leave again. 

There was irritation on your face as you glanced up from your phone, and he was unable to tell if it was directed at him or whoever was texting you, but it morphed quickly into apologetic as you sighed. “Yeah, sorry. I’ve got a date. I’ll be back in a bit. We can talk then?”

You didn’t sound too happy about that, and Akaashi definitely wasn’t, but his words stuck in his throat. A date. Jealousy bubbled viciously in his stomach, oozing into his heart and up his throat, and he jerked his head once, willing the tide to stem until you had left. It was his own fault, after all, for waiting so long to ask and then ignoring you for a day.

He was such a coward.

Staring at your phone again, you missed the pinched narrowing of his eyes and headed towards the door, waving goodbye before closing it behind you.

--

It was only an hour or two later-- you weren’t totally sure, since you weren’t even sure when you had gotten home and abruptly left again-- that you were dragging your sore feet up the steps to the apartment again. The date had gone horribly wrong, right from the start.

Differences of opinion, differences of interests, his disinterest in listening to you talk about anything you were interested in, it seemed like the two of you just couldn’t sync up to have an actual conversation.

Not to mention how you kept inadvertently comparing him to Akaashi, from the way he spoke to you to the way he spoke of other people, right down to the way he ate, for fuck’s sake. You had it bad, and the date was a terrible idea.

When you stepped into the apartment it was quiet and mostly dark, only the lamp on the side table on, and you wondered if Akaashi had either left or gone to bed.

The vase still sat on the table, illuminated in the soft yellow light, and you recognized red roses, tulips, carnations, and the ever present jasmine. Closing the door behind you with a soft click, you kicked off your shoes before sitting on the couch. As ever, the arrangement was flawless, all the flowers mixed together with perfect balance, and you burst into tears. 

It was too obvious, now that you thought about it.

Almost two months of flowers, at least one everyday, a bouquet for every milestone or when you were feeling down, his strange text yesterday and how he wanted to talk to you today-- you really were an idiot.

And then you get home and tell him you have a date-- it must have felt like a slap to the face, and the sick queasiness in your stomach was no less than you deserved for doing that to him, for being so blind.

As quiet as you tried to be, you must still have made too much noise-- that or he wasn’t asleep in the first place-- because there was a weight on the couch beside you and an arm around your shoulder.

Soft words you couldn’t comprehend were whispered into your ear, that same arm pulling you close into his chest, where it was joined by the other one around your back. The tears continued to fall, wetting his shirt, your fingers wrinkling it where they twisted in, and he held you until you finally quieted.

“What’s going on, _____? Did your date hurt you?” he asked and, now that you were calm enough to listen, you could hear the panic and worry in his words. 

Taking deep, gulping breaths to steady yourself, you shook your head. “No, nothing like that, I-- ‘Kaashi, I’m so sorry. I’m such an idiot. I shouldn’t have agreed to that stupid date, he was such a jerk and all I could think about was you and then I came home and saw the flowers and I realized--”

He shifted against you, petting your hair as you stumbled over your words. He could hear the unshed tears building up again and rushed to soothe you before they could spill over. “Woah, hey, slow down. Why were you thinking of me on your date?”

You paused to look up at him, tan skin and blue eyes backlit by the lamp, face twisted in confusion and you had the insane urge to laugh. He was so beautiful it was unfair, how could he ever want a stressed out mess like you?

“I think I love you, Akaashi,” you whispered, and then dropped your eyes down to his chest, unable to stand the fear of rejection. 

A soft hand cupped your cheek, thumb sliding across your cheekbone before tilting your head up to face him again. 

His nose brushed yours and you swore your heart stopped, a soft noise leaving the back of your throat as he asked, “Can I kiss you?”

Instead of answering, you closed the distance, grazing his lips in what could barely be called a kiss and only left you aching for more. He delivered, slanting his lips across yours, molding them together and your head spun with a mixture of relief and desire. The scent of the flowers on the table mingled with the smell that always came off of him, a heady perfume of hundreds of different flowers that you couldn’t get enough of. It clung to his skin, his clothes, and now you, and you allowed your hands to run over his shoulders and up the back of his neck, threading into the curls at the nape of his neck.

By the time you parted, you had crawled into his lap, knees on either side of his hips, and followed that up with several small kisses afterwards. His hands found their way up your shirt, stroking along your spine and squeezing your side as you rested your forehead against his.

“You’ve been telling me all this time, haven’t you?” you asked, barely a whisper, and he chuckled breathlessly in response.

“Yeah. I guess it was too subtle,” he answered, and then kissed you again. He couldn’t get enough, not after he had waited so long to taste you. His palms smoothed up your back, just beneath the strap of your bra, and you shivered in his hold. “I can show you now, if you want?”

You shivered at the warm promise in his words and nodded. “Please, ‘Kaashi.”

He hummed in response, leading a trail of kisses across your cheek to just beneath your ear. Nimble fingers unclasped your bra beneath your shirt, and then came back down to grip your thighs. With a strength you hadn’t expected, he hoisted you up from the couch, carrying you down the hall and kicking open his door. 

You had been in his room countless times before, but it took on a different view when you were laid on your back on his bed, surrounded by a dark grey blanket with him hovering over you. He was stripping out of his shirt, and you licked your lips at each inch of skin that was exposed. His muscles rippled as he pulled it over his head, revealing his lean chest, flushed as red as his cheeks as he caught you staring.

“What is it?” he asked as he propped himself up over you. He was still standing, your legs hanging off the side of the bed and he nudged them open, slotting himself between your thighs. Your expression was that of a deer in headlights as you looked from his face down to the bulge in his shorts, settled right against the crotch of your jeans. 

“You’re just-- so pretty, Akaashi,” you whispered, trailing the fingers of one hand down his throat and chest, watching the muscles on his stomach jump and flex. Your head was still spinning with all this new information, but you weren’t about to let it overwhelm you. Wrapping your other arm around his neck, you pulled him down for another searing kiss, his lips turning up against yours.

When he pulled back, he was blushing, but there was a steely, mischievous glint in his eyes.

“Not as pretty as you, kitten. I think these clothes need to go. I want to feel you,” he said, tugging your shirt over your head. You sat up to help him and followed that by throwing your bra to the floor beside him, and he groaned. “God, you’re so beautiful.”

Palming your breasts in his hands, he pinched your nipples between his fingers, feeling you shiver beneath him. Your back arched, begging him silently for more, and he couldn’t help but chuckle. You looked so good, sprawled out beneath him, eyes wide and pupils blown out, lips parted in pleasure. His cock ached at the sight, and he gave into the temptation to grind his hips into yours, eliciting a quiet gasp from you.

Fingers wrapped around the hard muscle of his bicep. “Akaashi, please.”

“Keiji. Say it,” he commanded even as his fingers trailed down from your breasts to your stomach. He smiled when you giggled but didn’t prolong it, instead flicking the button of your jeans open. They were tugged roughly down your legs and discarded, and then he was tracing the outside of your panties, watching you squirm.

Your lips parted as he ghosted his fingers over your clit, panties already dampe under his touch. “Kei-ji, touch me, please,” you whined, fingers digging into the blanket.

“Whatever you need, kitten. I’ve got you,” he said, pulling the gusset of your panties aside. You were already so slick, and you moaned when the pads of his fingers rubbed over your folds. The heel of his hand grazed your clit and you were desperate for more. “You’re so beautiful, _____. So wet for me.”

You nodded in agreement, tears of frustration beginning to sting your eyes, and you called his name when he finally sunk one long, slender finger into your tight heat. You clenched around him as his thumb found your clit, pumping in and out of you. A second finger soon joined the first, his heated eyes locked on your slick covering his palm and the way your pussy seemed to suck them back in hungrily. A mess of moans and his name fell from your lips, accentuated by the thrust of your hips as you seeked out more of his touch.

With a groan he sank to his knees, letting his tongue replace his thumb and he swore he’d never tasted anything sweeter on his tongue.

“God, princess, you taste so good,” he groaned against your clit, and you spasmed around him at the sensation. His fingers were long enough that you could feel him toy with your cervix on every thrust, and your toes curled when he grazed over the spongy spot on your walls. “Need you to cum on my fingers, okay? Then I can fill up this pretty pussy.”

You gasped at his words, not expecting anything that filthy from your soft spoken roommate. That coupled with the mental image of him sliding his cock into you drove you right over the precipice of your orgasm.

He moaned, feeling your walls clamp down on his fingers, and his cock twitched.

When he stood up, he drank in the sight of your heaving chest and spread legs, pussy glistening. Arousal and contentment flooded his system, purely happy that he finally had you laying before him as he’d dreamt so many times before, and he let his shorts drop to the floor.

Your jaw dropped as he pumped his shaft a few times, smearing the precum already leaking down his thick shaft. It was a good thing he had prepared you, but the thought of having to stretch to take him was equally tempting. The slick sounds made you squirm, wanting to be filled and stretched. You locked your ankles around his thighs, earning a chuckle.

“Patience, kitten. Slide up the bed,” he said, watching you move backwards until you were laying in the center.

The bed dipped under his weight and he crawled over you, shoving his knees beneath your thighs. Hoisting your legs up to lock around his hips, he let his cock settle against your folds. You shuddered when he slid across your still sensitive clit, whining low in your throat.

“Too sensitive, kitten? Want to stop?” he teased, and laughed at the look of panic that flashed across your face. You shook your head frantically, legs tightening around him, and he soothed you by cupping your cheek. “Me either. I’m gonna make you feel so good, pretty girl.”

There was a promise in his eyes, and you were still trying to connect the Akaashi you knew with this one, the one that was cajoling and teasing and making you ache with a need to be filled with his thick cock.

“Please, Keiji,” you murmured, laying your hand atop his and nuzzling against his palm. “I want you inside me. Wanted you for so long, please don’t tease.”

He smiled in response, guiding himself to your entrance and you moaned as the head of his cock slipped in and you accidentally clenched around him when you thought of having all of him. A hiss filled your ears and he thrust the rest of the way in, your cunt parting around him like it was made for him.

“Goddammit, you’re so tight,” he cursed, trying to control the temptation to rock his hips. You were trembling underneath him, and he braced himself up on his elbows, resting his forehead against yours. “Need you to squeeze around me again, pretty girl. Please*.”

You earned a gasp when you did, his hips jerking down into you, his pubic bone grinding your clit and you mewled his name.

“K-Keiji, a-ah, that feels so good,” you whined, tears pricking your eyes. Your legs tightened around him, keeping him in place as he rocked into you in short, shallow thrusts. 

“Good girl. You feel so good, kitten. So tight and wet. God.” His voice was low and gravelly, eyes shut tight as he fisted the blankets by your head. He kept up that steady pace, pulling out more and more with each thrust until he was pistoning into you. The wet slap of his hips against yours filled the room, mingling with your moans and cries of his name. Each thrust hit every sweet spot, the curls at the base of his cock tickling your clit, driving you quickly towards your end again. Your nails dug into biceps as your hips rose to meet his, and when he opened his eyes he found you staring at him with open love and lust.

His lips crashed against yours, forcing you to swallow the loud groan that he uttered when he slowed and circled his hips, forcing his cock even deeper into your tight cunt. Your back arched, forcing your chest against his, and his fingers tangled in your hair.

“Need you to cum for me, kitten,” he whispered against your lips, repeating that same circling motion. The way he rubbed your clit and ground into your cervix flung you over the edge with a wail of his name. You squeezed so tight around him that his hips jerked and he found himself cumming, painting your insides white, unable to pull away because your legs were still locked around him. “*Shit, goddammit*.”

He let his head fall to the bed beside you, sliding his arms up until he was pressed flush against you. Breathing shakily, you let your hands roam his back, spreading the sweat that had built up. Your hips were starting to hurt and Akaashi noticed them shaking and sat up, pulling out of you so he could put your legs down.

“Akaashi, I--” you started to say, but he cupped your cheek and covered your lips with his thumb, cutting you off.

“It’s still Keiji, pretty girl. And I think we can talk about this in the bath,” he said, helping you up and off the bed.

After the bath was drawn and you were settled comfortably against his chest, drawing random patterns on his skin, he let you speak.

“What’re we gonna do now, Keiji? We already live together, I guess. Nothing’s going to change, right?” you asked, watching drops of water roll down his skin. He was so warm and you found yourself wanting to fall asleep, you were so comfortable.

His soft fingers were trailing up and down your back, his arm resting on the side of the tub, and he hummed thoughtfully before saying, “Well, I’d like to date you, if that’s acceptable. Otherwise  no, I don’t believe anything will change. Other than I’ll fall in love with you even more, _____.”

The back of your neck grew hot at his words and you hid your face behind your hands, fighting the heat that spread all over. Your heart stuttered and you whined even as your eyes stung. That was all you had wanted over the course of the last several months, and now here he was telling you exactly what you wanted to hear. It was an actual dream come true.

Once you had fought the embarrassment back down you turned to look up at him.

It was a fruitless endeavor because the soft, loving gaze you met made it erupt all over again, and you kissed the smirk right off his pretty lips for it.

“I love you, Keiji,” you whispered against his lips, and smiled when you heard the words breathed back. Settling back down, you resumed your doodling, spelling out different things against his slick skin, and then asked, “The flowers in the picture you sent. What were they and why did you send it and then ignore me?”

He chuckled at the petulant tone, the sound pleasant in your ear where it rested over his heart, before answering.

“Well, you had just sent that video of you in the garden and after watching it, I decided I was going to confess when you got home. The flowers just helped ground me.” Guilt flooded you again as you remembered how you had brushed him off when you walked through the door and, as if he could sense it, he wrapped his arms around you, pressing a kiss to your hair. “It’s alright, princess. I deserved it after ignoring you. I was just scared to tell you because I couldn’t tell you the meanings behind them without giving myself away.

You relaxed in his hold again, tilting your head up to look at him and were floored all over again. You would surely never get tired of the soft adoration in his beautiful eyes and hoped it would never fade. “So, what were they then?”

“Azalea’s for homesickness, because you took my heart with you. Camellia’s for passion, because that’s how strongly I feel about you. Forget-me-nots for love, so you don’t forget. And jasmine because they’re your favorite, and I love you with my whole being.”

The words were whispered into your hair, the only other sound besides the gentle sloshing of water as he had started to rock you back and forth, fingers cupping your neck to hold you too him, and the tears that had burned earlier welled over as you realized how deeply he meant those words and how deeply he had embedded himself into your heart.

There was no doubt in his mind that the tears spilling down his chest were good, not when they were overlaid with kisses everywhere you could manage, and then you stilled, content to just let him hold you after that. No other words were said until the water grew colder and you shivered.

“We should go to bed. It’s already very late,” he murmured, and helped you to stand. His breath hitched as the water cascaded down your body, feeling arousal build all over again. He ignored it as you toweled off and redressed, snagging his shirt up before he could grab it and slipping it over your head. “You are not helping me to keep my hands off you, kitten,” he growled, grabbing you by the hips and guiding you towards his bedroom.

You let him lead you with no resistance besides pausing to wiggle against him and giggling when he sighed in mock exasperation.

“Maybe I’m not trying to,” you said, sauntering towards the bed.

“If that’s the case,” he answered, pinning you to the mattress. Your legs naturally came up to hook over his hips and his shorts slipped down, exposing his already hard cock. “I guess we aren’t ready for bed yet.”

⇥  masterlist 

⇥ taglist: @sluttony​, @visaintes​, @yunhosblackgf​, @super-noya​, @byebyes-world​, @newfriendjen​

[hopefullystillatheatrestudent]

okay so i’ve been going crazy these past few days. all about cockles/jensmish and obsessively watching their panels or reading the transcripts BECAUSE. THEY ARE LOUD. LIKE. i saw some fancams on twt and i thought people were just exaggerating but noooooooooo!!!???? so, getting to the point. you said that how do we know that jensen is performing masculinity? because jared isn’t and THAT IS A BIG BRAIN MOMENT. ON POINT. I CANNOT STRESS THIS ENOUGH. a particular moment from gag reel that jumps out (which you’ve talked about) when jensen goes ‘cas, you are my baby daddy’ and misha goes, ‘i know i love you too’ and jensen goes, ‘i didn’t say i love you’ and misha goes, ‘i know you wanted to’ and jensen says, ‘i love you’ WHAT THE FUCK! that was NOT a joke. yes, people took it as a joke and had a good laugh BUT I HAVE WATCHED IT TOO MANY TIMES AND IT LIVES IN MY MIND RENT FREE BECAUSE IT WAS NOT A PERFORMANCE. THAT WAS JENSEN. THAT WAS MISHA. jensen has a had trouble with the pda and being all touch feely (the breakup theory) and he gradually grew into it, accepted it and misha was right there all along, never pushed it. it was like a deancas au but tbh, 99% of destiel is because of cockles and we all know it. i just. jensen has latched onto dean as an emotional support because he tunes with it. understands it. projects on to it. yeah, i just had to say it and get it off my chest. (and what about those poetry pages on instagram? alma? what is your opinion?) btw, you have a lovely blog and your analysis are right on target.

so there is a LOT i’m going to address here(how dare you bring up [gunshot] i HAVE to talk about it now) so again!!!! under a cut it goes but i hope you appreciate my rambles anon it seems like you do :,)

1. jared vs. jensen and performing masculinity. hell yeah man. jared and jensen are both just ‘guys from texas’ but they are still so vastly different. today i actually had a revelation that i’m pretty sure has to do with me being bi. and it’s that i have a group of straight friends(that i love dearly but they care too much about hockey and pitbull imo could not be me) and i have a group of queer friends(who are also batshit[affectionate]). and it’s like whichever group i hang out with a different side of me emerges? they’re both me, it’s just that certain aspects of who i am as a person only surface depending on who i am around. however, i will say i feel like i watch what i say around my straight friends more. i see that very clearly in jensen as well. around jared during panels and on set, he’s definitely putting on an air of machismo and engages in typical guy talk. i do think an element of it is performative, because he wants validation from jared that they’re still just two dudes from texas taking on the world together despite his sexual identity. does that make any sense??? i hope so. but when he’s with misha he is an entirely different person and his sense of humour becomes wildly different. the machismo fades away, he’s way less caught up in what people think about him, lets his guard down, etc. to go back to my original point which is how j2 are different in that regard....jared does not do this. he is a constant. he does not flip a switch between ‘performing masculinity’ and ‘not’ because he isn’t performing any part of who he is. he just IS. so yeah these two are similar in many regards but there’s somewhat of a dissonance between them when it comes to how they perform masculinity because one of them is putting on a show and the other is merely being.

2. that crypt scene blooper(here just in case you need to see it again. do it. as a treat.) when i tell you i have easily seen this over thirty times??? since it first came out??? i mean it. it is such an overlooked(r*mantic) moment and it means so much more than people think it does. i’ve talked about the context behind it, and i think that’s why this blooper was so meaningful, so i’ll mention it again. jensen and misha had a LOT of trouble with this scene. the reason is that jensen couldn’t wrap his head around why dean would be saying these things, if i remember correctly, and both of them sat down and scoured over how they should play it for a while before filming(teamwork ;) teammates *ahem*). [to be honest we all know why jensen had a hard time with that scene and it is because it is blatantly romantic. rip to him but i would simply give in to it at that point but oh well] so anyway, their heads were scattered going into shooting, which is NEVER a good headspace to be in for a scene, ESPECIALLY not a pivotal one. but they had each other to help them through said weird energy on set that couldn’t possibly have invoked the best feelings, especially considering jensen STILL doesn’t think he played that correctly(but he praised misha on his performance :,) ). and with that context every single part of that video hits haRD 

-’stop pulling my face towards your crotch’ i think this is objectively hilarious because it really really looks like jensen is pulling HIMSELF towards misha’s crotch. again, you’re fooling no one, jensen. misha’s wheezing laugh and the way he wraps himself around jensen is also,,,sweet??? like i don’t know how else to describe how i see it but this moment really reads as jensen, in his weird ‘constructing elaborate rituals’ way is asking for security through a physical touch from misha and he happily obliges and gives jensen what he needs. because i mean...watch it again. jensen ‘fights back’, but not really at all, actually. pretty wimpy counterattack. he literally lets himself be smothered by misha, and i would literally describe what they end up doing as cuddling. 

-’i need you, cas. you’re my baby daddy’ i love having an actor’s perspective on things bc i think i can explain what’s going on here. jensen just delivered what was(in his own mind) a rotten take of the lines he’s most scared of delivering. so the scene was already messed up. therefore; ensuing fuckery is warranted to help him feel better. but there’s also for sure more than meets the eye for what he says here because of misha’s reaction after??? like he seemed genuinely touched. first of all, he’s saying ‘you’re my baby daddy’ as half-jensen, but not necessarily dean either(because he didn’t say the previous lines as true to his character...you get it), to misha, not cas. i think i’ve made this point before, but every single innuendo in the gag reels is to misha specifically, never once cas. therefore; logical conclusion: ‘you’re my baby daddy’ was for misha and it meant something deeper than we think because of what follows it

-this part. jensen’s giddy ass smile after he sees misha crack and then misha says ‘yeah, i know’ (can i just say his voice when he says this is so intimate???? like am i intruding guys??? sorry i’ll let myself out) also he is smiling SO BIG

- ‘i know’ ‘why are you laughing?’ ‘no i know i love you too’ this analysis is already so long but i still want to get into what THAT whole exchange means. ‘why are you laughing?’ to me sounds like jensen’s pretending to be affronted by misha laughing at something that is serious. and it’s serious because he quite literally meant ‘i love you’. he did. misha knows it. misha’s really REALLY good at cutting the bs and just getting to what people are actually trying to say. he has an innate sharpness to his sense of humour. so yes, misha is being 100% accurate when he says ‘i know, but you wanted to say it.’ misha isn’t lying here. jensen did want and mean to say ‘i love you’. and then he actually does say it(in a jokey way but not really). 

- so yeah. it is actually so romantic??? like in a weird way jensen was professing his love for misha here?????? and that’s why this clip will NEVER. ever. get old. 

3. jensen having trouble with pda and projecting onto dean: we can all call ourselves dean coded cas girls but NO one deserves that title more than jensen ackles himself. he is dean winchester but marginally less repressed because he actually did admit he was in love with his best friend and let himself be happy, and pretty early on too. one year and two months as opposed to twelve years. so. happy deancas au is correct. and yes about the pda thing: one day i want to write my own post about both of their body language when it comes to each other, but all i can tell is jensen, even in the early days, couldn’t help himself from flirting with misha, but if misha ever crossed a line, jensen would not be happy. clearly he’s come around, however. what i find sweet is that misha always follows jensen’s lead when it comes to how much affection they’re allowed to show each other onstage. it touches my soul

4. destiel is cockles fault. yeah. and the thing is everyone knows it, too. even non-cockles shippers will explain early destiel as entirely dependant on jensen and misha’s wild chemistry. and that chemistry is easily explained by the fact that misha and jensen are literally just wildly horny bisexuals who were crazily attracted to one another and were falling in love on screen before our very eyes. and when you have THAT insider info(which sounds cray doesn’t it!!!! the destiel actors are in love irl??? huh???) everything really does click into place. why destiel got SO popular when the show and actors never ever intended for it to happen.(i know some people think misha was playing cas as gay the whole time for shits and giggles, and i won’t deny that[especially considering he found out early on that destiel was why he was staying on the show], but i don’t think he really wanted it to amount to anything, nor did he care??? i mean he has the real thing with jensen, for one, so their characters aren’t really as important. for two, he loves joking about destiel because it’s a cultural phenomenon and it’s fascinating, and i’m sure he did ship it because he’s unhinged, but i don’t think it was vastly important to him either way.) destiel got popular because everyone was and is unintentionally reading into the real deal. i could pull up countless gifs that people have used as destiel proof that is actually just jensen and misha being messy. mainly jensen. if i’m being honest.  the symbiotic relationship between destiel and cockles is why i’ve stayed onboard the destielcule and shellerscape for three solid months now; because it is utterly fascinating to witness and kind of super beautiful, too. 

5. alma(and others). so. i do NOT want to really REALLY get into this in its entirety here and now so i will just give you my opinion on if i think alma is misha or not. also; i don’t want to mention the other poetry accounts here bc i feel like that’s a bigger breach in privacy, but a lot of people do know about alma now. way too many, actually. this is why we can’t have nice things. anyway-to answer your question-there is absolutely no doubt in my mind that yes, misha is running that alma poetry account. i am 100% certain. some people think it’s actually three people and they’re all connected to misha in some way but that is so needlessly complicated. as it goes in psychology; the easiest explanation is probably the right one. it’s just one person running that account, and it is misha collins. i don’t know why it’s so hard to believe KNOWN POET misha collins(who is known to spend most of his free time writing poetry anyway) would have created a secret poetry account to write about his intense secret relationship under an alias and also get legitimate feedback since no one used to know it was him. oh and the handwriting is identical??? you are blind if you do not see that i am sorry. and a million other things prove it’s misha too but yeah all you need to know is yes. it’s him. it would take a literal livestream from a random woman on that account to convince me otherwise. and honestly not even that because a random woman could technically still log in if misha asked her too. so. it would take a hell of a lot to convince me otherwise, clearly. that said DO NOTTTTTTTTTTTT GO ONTO THAT ACCOUNT WITH A SUPERNATURAL RELATED USERNAME AND COMMENT THINGS THAT ARE COCKLES RELATED. ARE YOU BRAIN DEAD WHY WOULD YOU THINK THAT’S OKAY. sorry i got heated but god please just don’t be dumb so many people have already gone way too far 

6. thank you for your lovely compliment on my analyses!!! i love doing them but i don’t know if people actually like reading them so i really appreciate it

[youreacowgirllikeme]

Blind Date

 

Note: just an idea I had, hope you like it. some soft fluffiness, but also smut bc I’m still h word for Jake, especially after how he looked tonight on tv.

Pairing: Jake Tapper x reader

 Warnings: smut, NSFW

 

(sorry for eventual typos, I wrote this in a bit of a frenzy)

enjoy

 

“You look horrible. “Abby stated matter-of-factly as she sat down in the restaurant chair across from you.

 “I missed you too, great to see you, thanks. “you responded, not even bothering to argue with her.

Abby was your best friend since college, if she said you looked horrible it was either a joke or a fact. Considering the way she was looking at you, probably the latter.

“Hard week at work?”

 You let out a tired huff.

“You have no idea. We got this new client who booked us for a nation-wide tv ad, and they’re so incredibly demanding. I’ve been working overtime for three weeks straight, it’s a miracle they didn’t call me in today.”

Your monthly Saturday brunch with Abby was sacred, work be damned.

Your friend was giving you a worried look across the table. “Well, I’m glad they didn’t, you deserve a day off.”

 “Enough of my sad life, how is it going over at Fake News?” you joked.

 “Amazing actually. You won’t believe it, but I’ve heard through the grapevine that they’re thinking about offering me John’s Sunday spot on Inside Politics. Can you imagine, my own hour, as an actual anchor. It’s nothing official yet, but I’m so excited.”

 “Oh my god, Abby, that’s awesome. I’m so proud of you. We should celebrate.” you exclaimed, beckoning a waiter to order two glasses of champagne.

 Abby gave you a warm smile.
“Thank you, babe. But let me be honest, I’m worried about you. You look exhausted, even your voice sounds tired. When was the last time you did something actually relaxing?”

 “I’ve watched a movie, like, a week ago. And I do yoga, at least sometimes.” You tried to argue, not entirely sure if you wanted to convince Abby or yourself.

 A smirk settled over your friend’s face, and she looked at you like she just had the most brilliant idea ever. You did not like that look at all, it usually meant trouble.

 “Well todays your lucky day, because I know just what you need to de-stress a bit.”

 You just raised an eyebrow at her. 
“Care to elaborate, genius?”

 “You, my friend, need to get laid.”

You snorted. “Fun times, Abbs, you almost got me,”


“I’m serious, Y/N, when was the last time you had sex?”

“Okay, it’s been a while, but I’m fine. I don’t need a man to interfere with the little free time I have. And it’s not like the streets are full of men chasing me. I don’t have time to date, and, like I said, I’m totally fine with the way things are at the moment.” You tried your very best not to sound defensive. 

The expression on Abby’s face told you everything you needed to know. She didn’t buy a single word coming out of your mouth.
“Y/N, trust me when I tell you, blowing off a little steam would do wonders for your stress level. And maybe you’d even meet someone nice. And, lucky for you, I know just the guy. He’s someone I work with, and I think you’d get along perfectly.”

 “You’re not actually suggesting setting me up on a blind date.” You couldn’t believe your friend. The last thing you needed was an evening full of awkward small talk with some boring, sleek CNN guy.

 “Come on, Y/N, take a leap of faith. What’s the worst thing that could happen?”

+++

 (One week later)

 “I can’t believe I actually agreed.” You murmured to yourself as you rummaged through your closet, looking for an outfit to wear on that damned date Abby bullied you into.

You thought about the peaceful evening you could have had, curled up on the sofa with a glass of wine, maybe getting some work done.

But it was too late to back down now.

 “Let’s just get this over with” you told yourself, applying some lipstick as if it was war paint. “Let’s hope that the guy is at least good-looking.”

 The restaurant Abby sent you to was nice enough, a small and intimate place, perfect for a date. You couldn’t wait to have your first glass of wine, because you could feel your nervousness increasing with each passing minute.

You entered the restaurant, looking for the third table on the window side that Abby had described to you…and directly turned around, practically fleeing through the door again as soon as you set eyes on the man sitting there.

 Back outside, you took your phone out of your bag and furiously dialed Abby’s number. She picked up right away, but you were shouting at her before she could even say a word.

“You better tell me that you did not set me up with Jake fucking Tapper.”

Was she out of her mind? This was the Jake Tapper, the face of CNN, hell, the face of the media in this country. What the fuck were you supposed to talk to him about.

But your friend just chuckled at you through the phone.
“When you saw him on TV some months ago, you said he was your type. Plus, he’s intelligent, funny, and single. Perfect for you. And now stop making a fool out of yourself and go in there. You got this, girl. Love you, bye.”
And with that, she hung up.

 You took a deep breath and tried to calm your nerves. You could not just leave now, and stand up Mr. Breaking News himself. So you pocketed your phone again, squared your shoulders and went back into the restaurant.

You made your way over to the table, coming to a stop in front of it. The man sitting there looked up to you and smiled. And wow, what a beautiful smile it was, sincere, warm and inviting, taking over his entire face.

“Hi.” You said, trying to sound confident.

“I’m Y/N, Abby’s friend.”

 

“It’s so nice to meet you, I’m Jake. I’m working with Abby, but she probably already told you that much.”

“She did, but I’ll be honest, I know you, of course. Big fan of your show.”

God, why did you just say that. He was probably going to think you were some kind of crazy fangirl now.

 But he just continued to smile his open, friendly smile at you.
“Always happy to hear that.” He chuckled, pointing to the opposite chair. “Do you want to sit down?”

 “Yes, of course, sorry.” You said, feeling silly because you totally forgot that you were still standing. You quickly sat down and tried your best to appear calm and collected, even if your insides were in turmoil.

 “Would you care for some wine? They have a pretty impressive list, I could pick one for us if you don’t mind.” Jake asked.

 “Wine sounds fantastic. I love it, but I’m not really an expert, so go ahead.”

 Jake took some reading glasses out of the pocket of his suit jacket and put them on his nose. 
While he was studying the wine list, you took your time to study him instead. He appeared to be in his late forties, so there was an age difference of probably 15 to 20 years. You didn’t mind that at all, older men had always been more your type.

He had a really handsome face, kind eyes that looked even better when he had those glasses on, and you loved his salt-and-pepper hair. He was wearing a light blue dress shirt with a dark grey suit jacket. You caught your mind wandering to how he might look underneath his clothes and gave yourself a mental slap on the wrist. This was your first date, no need to get ahead of yourself.

“Everything alright over there?”

 Shit, he had caught you staring.

 “Yes, sorry, I zoned off for a moment. I had a stressful week at work.”

“Oh, yes, Abby told me you’re working in advertising. Any interesting projects at the moment?”

You went on and chatted about work a bit. You were fascinated by what he was doing, and taken aback by the confident, yet humble way he was talking about it. This was absolutely not the behavior you were expecting from the leading anchorman of the nations most renowned network. He wasn’t arrogant or self-centered at all and you were definitely charmed.

The wine Jake ordered arrived with your starters, and soon after you had your first few sips you felt some of the initial nervousness fading away.

Soon, the conversation was flowing freely, and you discovered that Abby was right, you really did get along perfectly. Jake was incredibly funny in a dry and witty way and his sarcastic remarks made you laugh more than once. You also discovered your shared interest in graphic novels and argued a while about weather DC or Marvel was the superior comic universe.

Jake showed you one of his own cartoons on his phone, and with each moment you found yourself more drawn to the man in front of you.
At some point his hand started to lightly brush against yours on the table, and each touch sent a warm feeling through your chest.

You talked some more over dessert, had some more wine and overall, a really good time.

The alcohol gave you a pleasant, fuzzy feeling, and the desire to just get up and crawl on Jakes lap grew with each look he gave you.

 “Excuse me, Ma’am, Sir, were closing up now.” A passing waiter told you and put the check on the table.

 “Let me take care of that, please.” Jake said, taking out his wallet. You just thanked him and enjoyed the view of him putting on his glasses again to read the check.

 He really was a perfect gentleman, you thought to yourself, as he got up to hold your coat and then the door for you on your way out.


“I really had a wonderful evening.” you said softly, as the both of you were standing on the sidewalk in front of the restaurant. Jake shot you another one of his brilliant smiles, and you could feel your heart beating faster.
“Me too.” He replied. “I really enjoyed spending time with you, and I’d like to see you again.”

Now your heart was almost jumping out of your chest, and you could feel your own smile taking over your face.
“I’d love that.”

 Jake took one step closer, now standing so close you could almost feel the warmth radiating off his body. One of his hands came up to tuck a lock of hair behind your ear, his thumb slowly stroking over your jaw. His touch sent goosebumps all over your skin, and you slightly parted your lips, looking him directly in the eyes. They were warm, and dark, and you felt like you could get lost in them. And then he leaned down and pressed a kiss to your mouth.

It felt incredible, a kind of warmth that was totally unrelated to the wine spreading through your body, your skin prickling where his hand was still on your face.

You put your hands on his arms and kissed him back, enjoying the feeling of his soft lips against yours. He still tasted slightly like red wine, and you wanted nothing more than to explore the rest of his body with your mouth just as thoroughly.

 First date, you reminded yourself, and broke free from the kiss before your lust-clouded brain could make you do something you might regret later. You glanced up at Jake, who looked at you with an unreadable expression. Then, after what felt like forever, he finally spoke.

“Could I maybe have your number?”

 

“Of course.” You said, with maybe a bit much enthusiasm, but Jake didn’t seem to mind. You quickly typed your number into his phone, and just as you were finished, the cab you had called earlier was arriving.

Jake held the door open for you, and shot you one last, beautiful smile. “Good night, Y/N, get home safe.”

“Thank you for the wonderful evening, Jake. Good night.”

 You closed the door and the taxi drove off. You already missed his face as soon as he was out of sight, and you turned around to watch his receding figure through the rear window of the taxi.

Great, you were already down bad after one date. The man really got to you, and you desperately hoped that you would hear from him soon.

 As soon as you were home, you really felt the effects of the wine, so you quickly went to bed to get some sleep. Just before you were nodding off, you sent Abby a quick message.

 

You were right, he is perfect. THANKS xxxx

 

When Abby answered five minutes later, you were already asleep.

 Told you so ;) xxxx

+++

 When you woke up the next morning, there was a new message from an unknown number on your phone. Your heart made a flip in your chest, and you opened it as fast as you could.

 

Hi, this is Jake. It’s probably way too soon to text you, but I just wanted to let you know, again, what a great time I had yesterday. If you’d be up to it, I’d really like to see you again soon. Let me know if that would be alright with you. And have a nice Saturday :)

 

He had already texted you. That meant he didn’t think that you were crazy, or awkward, and that he wasn’t just acting nice, he genuinely wanted to see you again. You were filled with a giddy sort of happiness, and decided to answer him right away, there was no need to play any games here. Leap of faith, just like Abby said.

 

Good Morning Jake, I really enjoyed yesterday as well. I’d love to spend some more time together; would tomorrow evening be too spontaneous? I could make dinner, to return the favor since you paid yesterday ;) my place at eight?

 

As soon as you hit the send button you started getting anxious again. What if tomorrow was too soon? What if he thought you were being too eager?

“Stop it, Y/N!” you said out loud to interrupt your mental spiral. You wouldn’t make a fool out of yourself for this man, even if he was handsome, and intelligent, and funny. No way.

 But as you were standing in the kitchen five minutes later and heard your phone chiming from the other room, you were there in the matter of seconds to read the new message.

 

Tomorrow sounds perfect, just text me the address. I’ll bring the wine. xx Jake

 

You clutched your phone to your chest, the biggest, goofy smile on your face.

 You spent the remaining day extensively cleaning your flat, stressing out, going grocery shopping and stressing out some more. You face-timed Abby and bullied her into helping you pick out an outfit, since she technically was the one who got you into this mess in the first place.

Jake was occupying your mind whatever you did, and when you finally got into your bed that night, all you could think about was how his lips had felt against yours. Those thoughts sent a hot, burning feeling down between your legs and when you finally touched your pussy, you were already so wet and aroused that it only took you minutes until you reached your peak, Jakes name falling from your lips.

+++

To say you were a nervous wreck the next day would be an understatement. When you woke up, you decided to watch some TV to get yourself a bit of distraction. An ad was currently playing, and so you decided to check your mails first.

 

“Good Morning from Washington, where the State of our Union is in turmoil over the latest…”

 

Your head snapped up at the sound of the familiar voice coming from your TV, the voice that occupied your mind ever since your blind date on Friday. You had totally forgotten that Sunday morning meant Jake Tapper time on CNN, because usually you were either asleep or at work at 9 am. But now you took your time to really appreciate the man on your TV.

He looked way more serious than the Jake you got to know, no smile, just a stern expression and a dark suit and tie. Which didn’t mean that he wasn’t looking totally hot, and his intelligent and sharp remarks did nothing to calm your fluttering heart or the heat in your lower abdomen. You definitely wanted him, bad.


This is getting ridiculous, you thought to yourself, and turned the TV off to take a very long shower.

Afterwards, you spent the whole day pacing around your flat and annoying Abby with numerous text messages and another two face time calls. She assured you multiple times that everything would be just fine and by the time it was 7:45 p.m. the food was in the oven and you sat on your couch, waiting for the doorbell to ring.

When it finally did, you all but ran to the door only to stop and force yourself to take a couple of calming breaths before opening it. Jake stood outside, a bottle of red wine in his hand. He looked amazing with his white dress shirt and dark grey slacks, but again it was his smile that got your attention, he looked just as happy to see you as you were feeling.

Out of a sudden impulse, you surged forward and threw your arms around the man, hugging him and burying your head in his chest. He seemed surprised, but still put his free arm around you, embracing you.

“Hi.” You whispered, suddenly shy, but as you looked up to meet Jakes eyes you could see nothing but warmth in them. “Hi.” He replied, pressing a kiss to your hair. “It’s good to see you.”

 You slowly let go of him so he could actually enter your apartment. He followed you inside and you fetched some glasses for the wine. You talked about everything and anything over dinner, family, football, the book Jake was working on. You listened closely, and so did he as you told him about your passion for art and music. He even asked you to put some of your favorite records on as you moved over to the couch after dinner.

You were still talking animatedly but having Jake in closer physical proximity made it increasingly hard to focus on what he was saying.

Instead, your eyes and mind wandered to his hands. Without thinking, you reached out and put one of your hands into his, He stopped speaking, and looked at you. You could see the kind look in his eyes being replaced by something darker, more passionate.

 He spoke again, voice lower this time. “I’ve been thinking about you and our kiss without a break since yesterday. And just as long I’ve wanted to kiss you again, touch you again.”

He reached out, cupped your jaw with one of his hands and slowly ran his thumb over your bottom lip. It took every willpower you had not to suck his thumb into your mouth. This man had you hot and aching for him with just a single touch and a couple of words.

“Is that something you want me to do, Y/L?” his voice was only a low rumble now.

 

“Oh my god yes. Yes please.” You whispered, not really trusting your own voice to come out steady enough. 
The hand on your face slid to the back of your head and you uttered a surprised gasp as Jake just grabbed a fist of your hair and pulled you close, until your faces were only inches apart.

“You are beautiful.” He said, looking you deep in the eyes.

And then he kissed you again. And as soon as his mouth connected with yours, you realized just how much you had missed the feeling of his lips, the warmth of his body. But that was where the resemblance to the kiss you shared last night ended. Because this one was more.

More passion, more lust. Jake softly bit your bottom lip and used your surprised gasp as an opportunity to slide his tongue into your mouth. The kiss deepened and you could feel small sparks of arousal all over your body with every touch of tongue and every time he lightly tugged on the hair in the nape of your neck.

Your hands found their way around Jakes shoulders, roaming up and down his back. You were really glad he was not wearing his full State Of The Union Outfit, even if it had looked extremely hot, because as soon as you could feel the solid muscle through his thin dress shirt, you knew that those clothes had to come off at some point.

You lightly tugged on the hem of his shirt to pull it out of his pants and spread your hands over the warm skin underneath. Jake broke the kiss as soon as he could feel what you did, just to tilt back your head and kiss your exposed neck.

You couldn’t stifle a moan as he lightly sucked on your pulse point.

The feeling of his mouth on your skin made heat coil between your legs, and you tried to shift even closer to him, until you were almost sitting on his lap.

Jake continued to kiss your neck, while his other hand crept under your shirt to palm your breast through your bra. He lightly squeezed it and you moaned again, you nails raking softly over his back, making him groan against your skin.

“You like that?” he asked, and pinched one of your nipples through the thin fabric of your bra, and you could feel your panties getting soaked with arousal.

You decided that it was time to get rid of some clothing and started to quickly unbutton Jakes dress shirt, revealing more and more skin with each button undone. As soon as you were finished, he pulled the shirt of his shoulders and the view of his body made your mouth water. You ran your hands over his muscled chest, and you could see the way his eyes darkened again.

“I can’t wait to touch you everywhere.” He said in a husky voice and pulled your shirt over your head in a swift motion, and instantly his lips were on yours again, his hands roaming over your back, unclasping your bra. When your nipples came in contact with the skin of his chest, you couldn’t contain yourself anymore.

“Jake, please. Touch me, kiss me, anything. I need to feel you.” You pleaded, your voice slightly breathless.

 

“Take the rest of your clothes off, now.” Jake said, his commanding tone sending another surge of wetness between your legs.

 You got up from the sofa and stood in front of Jake. Slowly, you opened the zipper of your jeans and pulled them down, leaving you only in your black lace panties.

Jake was watching you, his intense stare burning on your skin.

“Everything. Off.” He said, never breaking eye contact.

Having the undivided attention of this man was so hot, you almost got lightheaded.

You slowly dragged your underwear down your legs, and as you were looking up again, you saw that Jake was palming the bulge that had begun to form in his pants. You wanted to touch him so bad.

“You are gorgeous. Amazing. Beautiful. Stunning.” Jake said, taking in the sight of your naked body. His voice was strained, this was clearly affecting him.

A light flush was beginning to form on your skin, you weren’t sure if it was because of arousal or embarrassment, but you definitely knew that you needed Jake to get his hands on your body, now.

You made your way over to him again and leaned down to open the fly of his trousers. His briefs were already tented by his erection, and you palmed him through his underwear, making him groan.

“Those need to come off.” You whispered, smiling at Jake, who just nodded and lifted his pelvis so you could pull down his trousers along with his underwear.

Finally, he was naked in front of you. He grabbed you by your waist and pulled you down on the sofa, lying on top of you. The feeling of his warm skin against yours was thrilling, you tried to get your hands on every part of his body you could reach, stroking his back, pulling his hair. Finally, you wrapped your hand around the base of his hard cock, giving it some light strokes.

“You feel so good, Y/N, I’ve been thinking about doing this since I first laid my eyes on you. I’ve been in a state since we kissed, and now” he whispered against your neck „I can’t wait to finally have that sweet pussy of yours.”

You couldn’t believe the words coming out of Jakes mouth, hearing him say filthy things like that was turning you on more than you could’ve ever imagined. Obviously, your thoughts were written all over your face.

“You like it when I talk like that, don’t you, sweetheart.” He said, pinching one of your nipples as he did.

“I…Oh shit, yes, yes I do. Please.” You whimpered, almost going you crazy with the need to finally feel him. 

He had mercy on you, reaching out between your legs. When he touched your pussy for the first time, you felt like the pent-up tension could make you faint any moment.
“God, you’re so wet, Y/N.” He thrust two of his long fingers into you without warning, and you almost screamed.
“And so tight.”

“I need you, please Jake, fuck me.” You were begging now, way beyond caring about any sort of decorum as his digits touched that sweet spot inside of you again and again.

 He withdrew his fingers and shifted on top of you before he put his hands on your tights, spreading your legs. You couldn’t even begin to complain about the loss of his fingers, he was already lining up his cock with your entrance, and pushed in, slowly, filling you inch by inch until he bottomed out with a deep groan. His length stretched you in the most delicious way, and you cried out as he was starting to thrust in and out of you, leaving you almost no time to adjust to his size.

You couldn’t talk coherently anymore, you were just chanting his name over and over as he was fucking you into the sofa. Your nails clawed into his back as he was leaning over you, his hair falling into his face. Just as you thought you couldn’t feel any more pleasure, he grabbed one of your legs and probed it onto his shoulder, the new angle making you see stars with every move of his hips.

“You feel incredible, so tight and warm around me, you are amazing.” He looked down on you, taking in your face, squinted with pleasure, his name falling from your lips over and over again.

He reached between your legs and started rubbing your clit, never slowing down his relentless, hard thrusts. The combined stimulation was almost too much for you and your orgasm was approaching fast.

“Don’t stop, please, just don’t stop.” You cried out, the pleasure running through your body like a wildfire.

“Look at me when you come, I want to see you. Look at me!” Jake growled, breathing hard as he sped up even more.

You hit your peak with a cry, sparks dancing over your skin as your walls clenched around Jakes cock. Your eyes were fixed on his, and he looked at you like you were the only person on the entire planet.

Seeing you come undone beneath him, Jake only lasted for another few deep thrusts before he came, shouting your name and spilling his hot release inside of you.

 He laid on top of you afterwards, his face on your shoulder, breathing deeply. You pressed a soft kiss to his cheek, and he turned his head to look at you.

“Hi” you said.

“Hi” he replied, your favorite smile spreading across his face again.

 “I liked that very much.” You said, pressing another kiss to his lips. He chuckled and propped himself up onto his arms with a small sight, rolling off you. Luckily, your sofa was large enough so you could comfortably lie next to each other.

“Me too, that was fantastic.” He replied and pulled you closer, putting his arm around you. You buried your face into his chest, soaking up the heat of his body and his wonderful smell.

 “Maybe you should come over more often.” You suggested, sounding a bit nervous again. You didn’t want to appear clingy. But this man had just rocked your world, and you couldn’t just act like nothing happened.

“I’ll come over whenever you want me to, sweetheart. Consider me at your beck and call.”

 “Stay the night?” you asked in a hopeful voice. You had work in the morning, but you just couldn’t imagine letting him go anywhere now.

He just nodded, smiled, and kissed you again. That soft, tingly feeling in your chest increased even more, and you just happily snuggled up to him.

 Later, as Jake was already asleep next to you, you took up your phone and sent a quick text message to Abby.

Next brunch is my treat! I owe you xxxx

[firewoodfigs]

some ~ highlights ~ for the past week:

- the start of the week was a pretty purgatorial experience, because i was rushing to clear all my work before i went on break 😫 i don’t think i got much sleep then lol i was literally just living off adrenaline and caffeine and stress — all of which combined did make me 52 times more efficient than i normally am LOL. i managed to clear everything in the end, so yay!!!

- also managed to make up for the sleep deprivation, which was very much needed :)) as tswift once said “sleep in half the day // just for old time’s sake” <3 i’ve been sleeping most of the pasts few days away and going on a bit of a social media detox because my eyes are really feeling the strain from work so 🥺 thankful for a brEAK!!!

- my bf and i drove over to a friend’s to drop off some snacks last Sunday night, and she gave me a bottle of kombucha that she made herself (along with an assortment of snacks to tide us through the late nights) 🥺 i’m not usually a fan of kombucha because the ones i’d had tastes like yakult gone bad, but this one was really good!!!! hats off to my friend for being a pro in the kitchen 🤩

- after months of scrimping and saving, I also finally got the guitar of my dreams 🥺🥺🥺 my fingers are all calluses now but it was well worth it. I learnt all too well, treacherous and crazier this week, and I’m so excited to learn more of tswift’s songs and put my guitar (a Taylor!!!) to good use!!! My bf is probably sick of listening to tswift’s Red album on loop by now (but also he’s secretly the biggest closet fan ever LMAO)

- I’ve also been writing a lot more songs recently, but I’ve been having trouble nailing down the bridges (which are always the trickiest part for me). That being said, I’m otw to my first vocal lesson now, and the coach I was talking to was nice enough to offer to help me out with songwriting too, so :’) fingers crossed it all goes well!! I’m still a nervous wreck when it comes to singing in front of people so it will probably take me at least fifteen minutes to regulate my breathing LMAO 🤠

- another Best BuyTM of 2021 is this hand soap that’s been all over tiktok LOL. I found the cheaper version of it and my bf and I have been washing our hands like excited children discovering bubbles for the first time ever since we got it. Fun times!!!

- I’ve been reading Tove Ditlevsen’s The Copenhagen Trilogy, and it is quickly becoming one of my favourite reads of 2021. Everything about it is stunning and I absolutely adore her prose!!! I strongly recommend this to everyone — I’m only halfway through but her exploration of girlhood and adolescence is so compelling yet relatable :’) This is an excerpt from part i, Childhood:

- friday was girls’ night out (or in, since we went to a friend’s place) and i was so happy to see my friends again 🥺 i’m always so thankful for friendships that have withstood time and change and it was just nice to hear about all that’s going on in everyone’s lives (in person). i also got to meet my friend’s dog again and am thoroughly convinced that she is an angel in disguise. like,

literally HAVE ALL MY UWUS!!! my friends have taken to calling me the weakest link bcs i simply cannot resist her puppy eyes and have to give her a treat every time. they’re not wrong 🤠

- i am really grateful that i got to spend time this weekend with the loml without any interruptions from work bcs we’re both on break now!! this is the first time in a long while since we’ve had a weekend to ourselves. we didn’t do much apart from eating and sleeping and watching black widow, but it was nice all the same! i just enjoy spending time with him haha and seeing him stress-free and well-rested fills me with inexplicable joy :’) we’re going to try our hand at painting today and manifest our non-existent artistic sides, which will be a fun time 😆

- SPEAKING OF ART, @nightofnyx8 made an incredible cover of “old time lovers” and everyone should go listen to it now because her voice is absolutely STUNNING!!! did i tear up at a bus stop while listening to it? absolutely not. did i spend the weekend screaming and yeeting into my pillow??? ofc not!!! (spoiler: im a terrible liar) ANYWAY PLS LISTEN TO IT I PROMISE U WILL NOT REGRET IT!!!! I AM MOT OVER IT STILL AND WILL NEVER BE AND ILYSM RACHEL U TALENTED UNICORN <3 (I’ll link it in a separate post so u can reblog this work of art🥰)

- i’m editing ch 2 of the college au now too so!!Looking forward to posting it tomorrow night :)

[thoradvice]

hi, I’m feeling a bit sad and anxious.. I feel like I’m wasting my time, on doing nothing. I wrote about it in my diary and it made me realize things. I get anxiety from thinking about my life in the future. And I constantly disappoint myself by doing absolutely nothing all day, everyday. I tell myself that maybe it is because I need to rest but I also feel like I don’t deserve to rest bc i literally haven’t done anything. It makes me feel SO horrible and stressed. A short pt. 2 coming sorry

ok pt. 2 :/ tw anxiety? I think a lot about what I’ll say when kids my age asks me when I’m 75 what I did as a teenager. It gives me so much anxiety bc I won’t have an answer. It may sound silly but this is one of my biggest fears. I’m lacking motivation to live and it’s so scary. I have a big dream but I can’t get myself to really work on it and get there. I can’t get myself to do ANYTHING. Sorry if I’m bothering you, that’s not my intention. I just have to talk to some1 than myparents&friends

hi there, sweetie. i’m so sorry you’re going through this. first off, i want you to know that you always deserve rest. rest is never ever something a person has to earn. you deserve rest because you’re a person, and we all deserve rest. i don’t like to say things such as “you’re X so you definitely deserve rest / etc”, because everyone deserves these basic things. but dealing with mental illness, especially anxiety is really exhausting. i’ve had bad anxiety pretty much since i can remember, and it’s mostly under control now, though it flares up sometimes without any kind of trigger - including recently. i’ve been exhausted this last week, because of it. it really affects you physically, as well as mentally. it’s so important to rest when you’re dealing with mental illness. i took a nap today and it worked wonders. my point is that rest is important and you will always deserve it.

with that in mind, a balance is also important. sometimes, you have to force yourself to do things, and that’s okay too. i’ll use another example from my own life, because i think it makes things clearer ! i have depression, and it’s debilitating a lot of the time. i’ve worked on myself & my mental health so much in the last year, and it’s gotten better. it’s still a nagging presence in my life, but it’s smaller now. sometimes, it flares up and i tend to have depressive episodes that last two weeks up to two months. thankfully, i have good coping mechanisms now, and they tend to be on the shorter end. anyway, i always give myself one or two days to rot, basically. it maybe doesn’t work for everyone, but i need that time to just feel what i’m feeling and experience and acknowledge it. after, i force myself into doing things that i know will make me feel better. i shower. i clean my room. i go for a walk. i do any things for school that i need to do. i reach out if i need to. sometimes, you just have to do it. if you feel that you’re slipping into a rut, try this out. it really does work.

onto your anxiety. this is something that is surprisingly common, i think. i know i’ve felt this way more than once, so you’re not alone. i want you to know that teenagers really don’t act like they do in the movies. sure, parties exist. i went to one when i was fifteen (just turned seventeen, for reference), and honestly it kinda sucked. everyone just sat in this girl’s living room listening to noughties music and drinking cheap alcohol. they’re extremely overrated. i can promise you that there are millions of teenagers who don’t go to parties, or have a ton of sex, or kiss a new person every week, or anything like that. if it makes you feel any better, my idea of a good night is watching a movie and sharing a pizza with my brother, and then watching some stupid sitcom alone in my room texting my girlfriend + friends all night. you don’t have to go on adventures with a group of 3-5 diverse friends, growing up along the way and falling in love with some girl who looks like a taylor swift knock-off to have a fun youth !! the phrase “life is not a john green novel” saved me from so much of this anxiety.

you’re a teenager. you don’t have to be working on your dreams right now. you don’t have to be doing anything but staying afloat. you have your entire life to build your dreams. i know the media bombards us with child prodigies and adolescents who are “changing the world”. but it’s more than okay to just focus on surviving for now, and leave your dreams til you’re older and more capable. you don’t have to do anything big to be meaningful or change the world. you change the world just by existing every day. the world would not be the same without you.

lacking the motivation to live is serious, and i’m so sorry you feel this way. if you can, please see a professional as soon as you can. feelings like this can often seem quite minor, but it’s scary how quickly it can turn into full blown depression & suicidal thoughts. you do not have to wait until it gets worse to get help. you deserve to feel better now. a professional would also be extremely beneficial in helping with your anxiety around life, too.

best of luck with everything, and i’m always here if you need to talk about anything. <33

[silverlightqueen]

okay you guys don’t care but I need to share this bc I’m so excited - I got some grades back from second semester today and I’m so happy, they’re so good!! I got a 62%, 68% and a 74%!! the feedback I got was amazing like I’m just in shock 😭 I’m just waiting on one more grade and then I’ll know my overall grade for the year!!

I feel like things are looking up for me now that lovestay boy is coming back like my manager is finally putting together a rota (sounds like bare minimum but the lack of rota for the past few months has been a source of great stress for me 😭), people at work are starting to come back from uni for the summer so I’ve got my friends back at work, and then today I got back those amazing grades (even though I literally didn’t attend any lectures or seminars after the third week of the semester 😩)

I hope this isn’t the part of the story where everything’s going really well and then it all just goes to shit bc I do not have the stability to lose all this happiness rn 🥴

[codename-adler]

Kevin Day and his Oblivious Literature Lover, pt.IV

In times of college finals, aftg is my coping mechanism of predilection. hope it helps some :)

>> Table of Contents,TW and other parts here!

i’ll let you guess what Kevin and Juliet chose for their project

oh, yes

the letters of Hamilton, Eliza and John + Hamilton: The Musical

i will fight you on this

at first, when Juliet suggests it, Kevin stares at her so hard bc really?? a musical??

but then she lends him the 50$ leatherbound official book of the musical (you know the navy blue and beige one? you know what i’m talking about, right?) and reads it all in one evening and wow

lin-manuel miranda? genius. ron chernow? Genius. alexander hamilton? Dumb Genius.

oh yeah and Juliet? Absolutely mind-blowing genius.

as Andrew & Neil grow closer and the match agaisnt the Ravens rounds the corner, Kevin finds himself looking more and more forward to the time spent at the library with Juliet

she is just so focused on their project and so oblivious as who he really is and doesn’t really care if sometimes he is more anxious, if freaks over everything to be perfect, if he babbles on&on&on&on about any bit of history he discovered

she’s just there, smirking, stiffling her laughs and asking for more

they’ve exhanged phone numbers and she installed snapchat on his, and although he never sends her anything, she always has a short video and a funny caption that pop up from time to time; they’re that little reminder that the world goes on outside of exy and that he exists outside of exy

she introduces him to funny videos and he didn’t know absolute dumb shit could make him snort??

his favorite is the peanut butter baby

at first the Foxes give him this judgemental look when he ugly-snorts in the locker room or at Eden’s, but eventually they just get that glint in their eyes as if they were in on the jokes

sometimes, Juliet’s so focused on writing down bullet points in her notebook, peeling the skin off her lips, so unaware of Kevin’s personal hell of a life, that he just wants to spill out everything

although he’s not sure if it’s because he wants her to know him and stay, or because he wants her to reject him and therefore spare himself the trouble of getting attached...

she takes the decision for him

on a Thursday afternoon, on their planned study session, she doesn’t show up

she doesn’t answer her phone either

he even tries out a completely blacked out snap with “r u alive?” in caption

no answer

he gives her space, sending her occasional cat videos he thoroughly researches

if she watches them, she doesn’t say anything

on Monday afternoon, she doesn’t come to class

that’s when the panic Kevin’s been reigning in just... bursts

what if it’s Riko? 

what if it’s the Master?

what if it’s Ichirou?

what if, somehow, it’s the Butcher’s people?

that afternoon’s practice is hell for the Foxes, Kevin is ruthless and an asshole and very agressive

Dan waits for him outside the boys’ locker room as all the other Foxes leave (not even Andrew and Neil want to wait for him)

“Spit out your goddamn problem before I tell Coach to bench you next game”

oh, how Kevin wants to cuss her out

and then he looks  at her face, ready to vomit words, when he sees her worrying her lips

just like Juliet

it shouldn’t be enough to make him tear up, but it does

he still manages to keep as much of the truth to himself as he possibly can

“My EAL partner isn’t responding to my messages or my calls and she didn’t even come to class today and it stresses me the fuck out and what if it’s like with Neil, Dan?” he says in one breath, trying to tear out the net of his racket

Dan recomposes her face and gets that very serious look, the one she usually gets when someone touches her family

“It’s not, Kevin. That’s over. We got Neil back, we got you back, you got Jean back. The team didn’t even know who that person was. The most info we’ve gathered is what you just told me now. Yeah there are some bets but it’s mostly for funsies, nothing even remotely serious. You wanna look for her?” she soothes him.

“I don’t even know...”

“She lives on campus?” she asks.

“I don’t- I don’t know, Dan. I spent months with her and I can’t even vaguely say where she lives! How fucked up is that?” Kevin yells.

“It’s not even remotely fucked up, Kevin. You should know that. Does she have instagram? twitter? Or like, facebook?” she questions some more.

“God, I don’t know. She only sends me stupid fucking videos and I never even respond like the goddamn asshole I am...”

“Shut up. We’re all assholes at the end of the road, ‘kay? You ain’t better or worse than others. Now she sends them to you in text or somewhere else?”

“Sometimes texts... Sometimes the yellow app, the chat one. Why.”

“Oh great, that’s great. We can locate her, with snapchat, if she forgot to turn off the sharing. And if you’re comfortable with that, too. I know you’re not a creep like that. You’re creepy sometimes, don’t get me wrong. But, not a creep.”

“Gee, thanks, Dan.”

“Hey, shush. You down or what?” she says, arching an eyebrow.

“Okay,” he answers, unable to make the fear go away without knowing for sure.

And so it turns out Juliet’s location is, in fact, knowable. Dan grabs one of Kevin’s shoulders as he leaves the court, squeezing her affection into her grip; he nods emotionally in her direction, as far as emotions can translate unto his face.

he doesn’t even know what he’ll do once he finds her, his brain is solely focused on the animated map that brings him closer and closer to Juliet

the more he progresses, the more he realizes he is far from Fox Tower, on a campus area he has never even seen

he stops before a decrepit building, old and moldy-looking

Jackie Kennedy Hall

student dorms? this shabby? she can’t possibly live-

except that she can, because there isn’t another building close and the map has brought him here, and he doesn’t really know her...

so Kevin straightens his shoulders, inhales deeply, and goes inside

he could go on and on and on about everything that is just wrong with the place, from the smell to the decoration, but he makes a beeline for the front desk (he’s lucky there’s even one)

he asks for a way to contact someone, flashes his press smile at the women behind the desk, gives up his ID in exchange for the room number

Juliet Grier, 418

stairs, stairs, stairs, stairs

heavy door, right, 412, 414, 416...

418

what, now?

Kevin hesitantly knocks once, twice

no answer

he knocks again and decides to speak up, in case she didn’t hear

“Juliet? It’s Kevin. Day. From EAL? Can I speak with you?”

still nothing

maybe she isn’t home... no, the map says she’s here. maybe she’s sleeping...

he decides to try one last time

“We really should finish that project, you know? I think we could both use the free time...” he says without his heart into it.

without surprise, no response still

he decides to take a loose paper from his sachel and writes down some words

Greetings Hi,

My friend Dan helped me look for you, but you don’t have to worry about your privacy; it’s because of the yellow app. You should turn that off if you don’t want other people to be nosy. 

You weren’t in class today. I’ll share my notes if you want them. But, you should come to class, it’s better. For learning. 

I’ll wait a few in case you’re asleep. 

Text me or call me or whatever when you’re ready.

- Kevin D. (your partner from EAL)

quick, efficient, to the point

Kevin slips the paper under the door, and waits

he refreshes the map too many times, to see if her location changed or if somehow there was a glitch

it stays put

he ends up sitting on the hallway floor, his back sliding down the wall

he catches up on a book for another class, checks exy stats and watches many, many videos of Jeremy Knox on the court and in interview

some students pass him with a nasty look, eyeing the lack of earphones on his phone

some other students walk by him and will themselves to keep going, because holy shit it’s Kevin Day in Jackie Hall

it’s at least an hour and a half before the doorknob slowly and quietly starts to click

Kevin was absorbed deep into whatever move Knox was making before scoring

the 418 door opens

Kevin gets up in one move, all things Jeremy Knox and exy forgotten

she’s loosely holding Kevin’s paper in one hand, the other clutching a large scarf that covers up the majority of her body

from what he can see, though, she’s wearing sweats from head to toe; her hair’s tied on the top of her head, but most of the curls escaped and it looks unwashed and her curls, dry

her skin’s turned pale, dark circles under her eyes, a haggard look in them, her cheeks stained with dry tears

Juliet looks terrible

“Hi...” Kevin attempts

she finally looks up from the paper and gives him a bored look that could rival Andrew’s

with a rough voice strained from cries and many days without speaking, she asks, “My EAL partner?”

“Well, yes. In case.”

“In case of what.”

“I-”

“I know who you are, Kevin.”

and isn’t that both his most ardent wish and his worse fear?

with that, she turns around and goes back to her dark room, leaving the door open behind her

is that... an invitation?

Kevin’s never been to another person’s place, apart from the Columbia house, Abby’s and Wymack’s

he reminds himself why he came in the first place and decides it would be a waste to leave now, right?

the small studio is a mess, much like its occupant

there are clothes everywhere, on the floor, on a chair, on the bed, on the desk

all the curtains are drawn, no light is on, the only source coming from Juliet’s laptop somewhere amongst her bedsheets

it’s like she made herself a nest and hasn’t moved from there for a long time

maybe even since last Monday, the last time he saw her

Kevin doesn’t understand the scene he has before his eyes

he’s never seen such apathy in someone that is not Andrew

and at this point, apathy is pretty much Andrew’s default state of being

not Juliet’s

Juliet is a soft glow, toothy grins, wild curls, countless jumpers, dumb jokes and references, color-coded notes, an organized mind, unwavering focus and determination, flowing words and warm, kind eyes...

so what is this?

then Kevin realizes he spoke aloud

and Juliet can only chuckle sadly, almost mockingly

“This? This is why I don’t have friends. This is why I don’t mix with people. This is why I’ll never amount to anything in life. This is my dirty laundry, both metaphorically and literally. This is it. That’s... That’s it. This is what I get,” she answers flatly

Kevin’s mind is spinning

he doesn’t understand

he needs to understand, though

“Explain it to me,” he says

Juliet looks at him like a brick just hit him on the head and made him speak Swedish

“Why.”

“Because, surely there’s a way to work with it.”

she laughs

it doesn’t reach her eyes, nor her lips or her cheeks

it’s just a desperate sound

it makes him think of Andrew again

and that gives him an idea, a gut feeling, if you will

“Can I try something out?” he asks

“Kevin... I can’t- I’m tired... It’s not a good idea... I’m tired, Kevin,” Juliet responds, pain noticeable in her voice and her movements slow

“I know, I- I know. Someone I know... He plays this game. It’s really not a game, it’s more like a communication thing. He calls it “A Truth for a Truth”.  In exchange for something I tell you, you tell me something. And in exchange for something you tell me, I’ll tell you something else. It’s made me... work through some things... before,” Kevin explains calmly

Juliet keeps on observing him from her bed, silent

“Look, can I just stay here to do homework? I have nowhere to go right now,” Kevin asks, almost blurting out “Please” before Andrew’s ghost caught it in his throat

she lies back down, burries herself in her covers, a silent “yes”

Kevin ends up falling asleep sitting on the floor, books open, head resting at the end of Juliet’s bed

he wakes up around 2 AM

he’s got multiple texts from Aaron and Nicky, one from Andrew, and one from Dan

“told everybody you spent the night at Coach’s. take care.”

he silently vows to thank her later

now he either really goes to Wymack’s to finish his night there, or... he stays exactly where he is

Juliet is still sleeping soundly

in a haze, he palms for a pillow or cushion, pulls his hoodie on and lies back down on the carpeted floor

he’s only awaken in the late morning when he brutally gets stepped on

“What the shit?? Kevin! How...???” Juliet yells

“Um, ow? No, no, don’t apologize so quickly. You just, you know, crushed my lungs and a couple of ribs, no worries, Jules!” Kevin groans

“Ju- you know what? I’m not sorry. Right now I gotta pee, so you better have a damn good explanation when I get back,” she replies and leaves her room to go to the bathroom at the end of the hall

instead of dread, Kevin feels calm about the upcoming conversation

he doesn’t prepare lies, doesn’t run away, doesn’t resort to assholery

he just stays put where he is on the floor, snuggles deeper into his hoodie, and waits for relief, for the truth

he waits for Juliet

[earthlyemily]

I’m struggling so much financially and honestly just wanted to vent somewhere. I’ve always lived in poverty and I think in my whole life I’ve had maybe 2 years where I didn’t have to stress about money and not be able to buy groceries or pay rent or be put into collections for not being able to make payments etc and that was when I was in college. For at least the past 5 years I’ve been struggling but I never talk about it. I don’t even know where to start haha I don’t even know what it’s like to not stress financially and be in debt. I’ll just start with the first things that come to mind with what I’m owing maybe. So it’s Dec. 23 and rent was due yesterday because we moved into this small suite attached to someone’s house on Nov. 22. It’s $1200 which is so expensive, but also the average price for BC if not even cheaper for a one-bedroom with a yard, utilities included. and no first and last, no pet deposits, etc because this is just short them for 4 months until the end of March because i reached out and asked and they said yes.

After 1 month I already remember why we went into the trailer almost 2 years ago and it’s literally because we can’t afford any other lifestyle. I think that’s the difference between us and some people that live in trailers, vans, etc. like we lived in a mouse & mouse shit infested trailer for 6 months breathing in their feces and urine and having it all over all our belongings. i literally had to take my whole life to the dump and we officially have no food storage because they ruined it all. there were at least 50-60 mice because a few birth cycles happened in the ceiling. I could write a whole post about my experience of living with field mice, but now isn’t the time so for rent, i only had $600 yesterday so that’s what I gave them. thank goodness they were okay with me asking for a few more days to make the other half. but I don’t even know when that’s going to be :(

my etsy shop veganveins has been doing so bad lately for more than one reason, most of my orders are just postcards and stickers, and while I’m grateful for them, that $1-3 profit isn’t going to keep my business going. and it’s so hard for me to work lately. the wifi doesn’t work sometimes for hours and I always get distracted by shawn and the dogs working from home in a small space. I need to get better at my time management. I got up at 8:30 today which is actually early for me so I’m proud of myself. I’m chronically ill and I really need to go get a blood test and see what’s happening because I haven’t gotten one since being diagnosed with graves disease again 1.5 years ago. anyways. i switched to a print on demand method this year for veganveins for some shirts and sweaters because i couldn’t afford to keep ordering shirts in bulk, and it’s honestly been so, so expensive and i barely make any profit. I’m currently owing my t-shirt printer $999 on one invoice (it was originally $2196 so I’ve at least paid half of it) but that was 2 weeks ago and I still need to pay it. Mario, my t-shirt printer has been with me since I started veganveins and I’m so grateful he gives me extensions on paying the invoices. every other t-shirt printer I’ve ever asked has said no. in addition to the $999 there’s going to be another $2200 invoice I’ll be receiving this week for my last order. I think because of the holidays he’s going to give me some time to pay off that too, but the problem is when I have outstanding invoices he doesn’t print new orders for me. He’s closed now until Jan. 4 so I just need to somehow make that much before then.

btw I don’t have a credit card ($8500 all used on veganveins and it got put into collections last march) and I had a fully used $5000 line of credit but I got a debt consolidation loan for $16,000 1 month ago and my payment for that is $167 a month. it fully paid off and closed my credit card and line of credit + $3000 overdraft which is nice. but now I don’t have any extra money except for what comes in. my credit is only 640 which is really bad in canada so I won’t get approved for a new credit card or loan until I build that up, which is going to be a few months of regular payments. so for regular payments, the $167 for the loan is due on Dec. 27. Yesterday the trailer loan which is literally unliveable from what the mice did until we renovate it came out for $260, that’s how much I pay once a month for it on the 22nd. I didn’t have $260 in my account so it got rejected and I got charged a $48 NSF fee. omg if anyone is reading this long i’m shook. i’m genuinely just writing this for myself to process my feelings and in case anyone was curious about my financial situation here you go haha. maybe some of you can relate, maybe some can’t. anyways. so now I somehow have to get $260 in my account for that for when they try to take it out again in the next few days.

another payment that was supposed to come out yesterday but hasn’t, but I’m sure will come out today is our truck loan. they deferred it for 8 months because of covid which was so nice, but we started paying it again 2 months ago. for both those months I called and made my payment a later date and that helped, but there’s barely any service here so when I called 4 times yesterday to try and change the date the payment comes out, I was on hold for 20-30 mins then my phone would disconnect and hang up. so that’s $586 and it will come out today, I have $0.46 in my account right now so it will get rejected and I’ll get charged another $48 NSF fee. this is why being poor always costs more and the banks are always harsher on those who don’t have money. today I’ll try calling again to see if I can ask for it to come out on a different day like january 10 instead, so I can first have time to pay rent and the trailer and also our $190 truck insurance which got rejected from my account 3 days ago, which was another $48 NSF fee. oh and something else i’m so stressed about is CIBC is going to put me into collections on December 28 if I don’t pay $1000, $700 of which is purely their fees. I have a $300 overdraft which they said i have to cover by then and the $700 is literally their $48 fees added up over the past 3 months. I got a text from them today saying my account is over and it’s because an amnesty international $11 monthly donation came out and obvi there’s no money in there, so that’s another $48 they charged. they’ve already given me a month to pay it and don’t want to wait any longer :(

I owe everyone in my family money, my sister $1650, my mom $700 and my brother also lent me $700. none of my siblings have money either and my mom definitely doesn’t so I hate that i had to borrow that much, and it’s literally been months. thankfully they’re so patient but i can’t wait to not owe them that

omg and i can’t even think about the amount of money shawn’s grandma has lent us. she’s genuinely the only reason we haven’t been completely homeless. but it’s a lot. like i don’t even want to say the number on here. she let us use it from her line of credit over the years and we’ve been slowly paying her back, but she lets us go months at a time without making a payment which i honestly hate doing, but have no choice. i’ve felt a lot of shame and guilt about this, but I also know that she genuinely would rather help us than see us suffer.

so i’m gonna talk about a big reason I’m broke this month especially - saving a pig named buster. his rescue cost me $1850 out of pocket that I didn’t have. but otherwise he was going to be killed in 2 days, he was my baby and I loved him so I had to do it. I somehow made $1350 that went towards it but I’m still owing $500, which I just asked for an extension for today until the new year. i’m not really supposed to talk about it but everything I’ve ever posted here has stayed here, so that cost was literally just from me buying the pig off the farmer. myself along with everyone else ive talked to is disgusted that he charged that much, but he wasnt budging and if that’s what it was going to take, of course I’m going to do it. I wouldn’t think twice about doing it for my dogs and Buster was smarter and more affectionate than them. i love him and I’m so happy he was saved. a non-profit organization transported him to a sanctuary and it was my biggest wish come true and the happiest moment I’ve had all year. my eyes are literally tearing up haha i love him so much. i could write a whole post about his neglect but basically he hasn’t had fresh water in weeks, he was only being fed handfuls of mixed nuts, he was constantly dirty in a muddy enclosure with an electric fence that he was always getting shocked on. he never got true love or affection except for when I gave him it. i posted an instagram story about him and asked people to message me and that i needed help, 2 people donated $111 and $120 each, and 2 other people donated $15 and $12. Someone also e-transferred me $20. These 4 donations equaled almost $300 ($277) and I was so grateful for those people wanting to help me help buster. if anyone else wants to help me with the cost of his rescue i still do need help and would appreciate it so much. this feels really weird and vulnerable for me to do and i’m sorry if anyone is annoyed by this post, I just genuinely am struggling and figured if someone does have extra and wants to help, there isn’t harm in that. but i do feel guilty for asking because i know there are so many other people struggling out there that need even more help than i do :(

i haven’t talked about it publically but i guess I will now, this farmer that I bought buster off of is the owner of the organic vegetable farm i was living and working at this past spring and summer. we worked really hard all summer to be able to stay there and park for free in the winter, but this past fall he told us no one was allowed to stay at the farm anymore, including us, so we had to find a new place to bring our 14ft trailer in to live. so that was an unexpected bummer and if we had known we wouldn’t be allowed staying there anymore (despite doing the labour of $1200 a month for free harvesting organic kale, for an off-grid spot he told us was worth $350 a month to park) we wouldn’t have driven 8 hours with the trailer and we would have stayed in the snow in northern BC and sucked it up and lived on the land we got the opportunity to rent this fall. Donna, the woman who is renting the land to us has been the biggest blessing in my life this year. I love her so much. Basically, she’s letting us live on 170 acres for $600 a month. letting us do whatever we want on the land (building a cabin, setting up rainwater catchment systems, having a solar passive greenhouse and a huge garden) LIKE WHAT. we could even open a farm sanctuary if we had money, i wanted to so bad but obviously that dream didn’t even come close to being reality. opportunities like this literally don’t exist in canada, especially not in BC. i cant even process my gratitude, i cry everytime i think about it. when we go back in the spring it’s going to be the beginning of the rest of our life :) i want to rescue so many senior dogs. everything we’ve always wanted to do we’ll be able to do, assuming we have money haha. but i want to have an organic farm and grow veggies to donate to families in need, especially since we live on stolen indiginious land and I see how the goverment actively restricts their access to fresh healthy produce. but anyways by then it was too dangerous to drive 8 hours back hauling a trailer in the snow and it was just easier to stay in the okanagan until the spring. i know the farmer probably doesn’t realize this and he’s also probably struggling financially but not being able to stay at the farm for the winter months we worked for, and buying buster for that price is a big reason I’m in the financial stress I am now so I figured i’d talk about it.

anyways. i think this is long enough and i think anyone reading this gets the point, i’m drowning in debt, my small business is almost costing me more to run and i’m not making nearly enough profit to live, the past few months ive been living off grid (not by choice) and just focused literally on surviving and not freezing and getting water etc and not having service or internet has affected me negatively. there’s internet now in the suite I’m in, it works really good in the morning and not as well at night, like for example tumblr doesn’t work past 5 pm for me to post photos. but ive been in a bad sleep schedule since i got here that i need to change. im sick and i need to heal myself. tomorrow i’ll set my alarm for 7:30. hopefully i make some money today. i got a social media managing job and it will end up being $1000 a month once i do the 3+ hours a day of work which im already feeling like i barely have time for my own basic life tasks. but i can do this.

if anyone reading this wants to help me out a bit, my paypal email is emilymiddin@hotmail.com or http://www.paypal.com/paypalme/veganveins

and my e-transfer email is emilymiddin@icloud.com i have auto deposit so you won’t have to ask a question :)

this is my first time in 7 years i’ve made a post like this or asked for help. i won’t do it again but figured i have nothing to lose. if you read up to here i love you a lot and thank you so much for being here <3

[ikeservant]

girrrllll can I please have some hc for mitsuhide, kenshin, masamune, and hideyoshi with PMSing mc? I’m dying inside help plz🙏thank you very much have a great day

Big mood right here! I’m in my PMS stage and I hate it >:(. At least I could imagine beautiful warlords doting on me to ease my woes lol >//< I hope you enjoy!

Mitsuhide- Mc walked down the hallway, putting her hand on her gut bc girl was in some menstrual discomfort. Mitsuhide, noticing the troubled look on mc’s face, walked up to her, asking “Is walking tiring you already, little mouse?” Mc replied with a snippy “No, I’m fine.”, right after getting a bad cramp and holding in a cry while putting her arms in front of her abdomen. Able to deduce that this was a part of mc’s PMS but didn’t say anything besides giving her a kiss on the forehead and saying “Well at least you have a short work day.” “Wait no I don’t.” but Mitsuhide was already walking away. Shortly afterward she was asked to go to Nobunaga’s tenshu. “It occurred to me that you were scheduled to take a break today. Under my direct order you are not allowed to carry on any tasks today and will be under the care of- “ “Don’t tell me Mitsuhide set this up. I’m telling you I’m fi-nnneee”mc, being interrupted by another wave of cramps. “I’ve just seen enough evidence that you are not allowed to work for the rest of the day. Mitsuhide is waiting for you and will care for you.” Annoyed that now her boss knows she’s PMSing, she threw open the door to Mitsuhide’s room ready to give him a piece of her mind but was met with a relaxation resort. Futon laid out, a hot cloth to be a heating pad, and incense making the room its own safe haven. Mc started to tear up before Mitsuhide pulled her in the room, insisting for her to relax and let him take care of her. Be prepared to fall asleep as he plays with your hair.

Kenshin- Avoided women like the plague most of his life until he fell for mc and got together, so he keeps freaking out every month until he realizing PMS does not equal medical emergency.Takes it back that women are weak and fragile when he learns that every month their organ goes on a crazy rampage and they’re just considered natural and put up with it until they get old. Asks if there’s a cure in the future but learns there’s only meds to help decrease discomfort. “Sasuke make a PMS medicine or I’ll kill you.” “Aye aye captain.” (only was able to make pain relievers so overall success). Still doesn’t have tact when asking “Are you on your PMS/period stage?” when mc is irritated, crying, or in discomfort (he’s just genuinely asking so he can help do not hit him). Keeps a mental note of mc’s comfort foods so he can bring them to her and makes her take a break from work because one time mc got a cramp while carrying a vase and hunched over tearing up and that was the breaking point for mandatory no heavy/physically stressful activities. Good at massages and will make mc’s back and tummy feel so much better. Bunnies are definitely the best heating pads and destressers for mc.

Masamune- Probably that one guy that goes “We’re in this together! UterUS!”. He’s a master of  comfort food of course. After describing chocolate and other sweets from the future, he’s gotten good at recreating sweet warm comfy foods for mc to consume. Thinks mc is a brave trooper for having to deal with a painful, uncomfy organ for a week every month and will assist his brave kitten with whatever tasks. Will rub her tummy when it feels bad, joking that he didn’t know that he had another Shogetsu. Good at making her laugh and relieving her irritability by being his usual entertaining self and reassuring her that it’ll be over soon. If she starts feeling bad while walking he’ll just scoop her up with a toothy grin and rush her to where they need to be, even if it’s to the war council with no shame both to keep her from cramping up too hard and to distract her from the pain while making her laugh. Would probably “innocently” suggest a hot makeout session to distract her and make her feel better (no harm in givin it a try ��).

Hideyoshi- Not very shocking that he’d be ultimate caregiver. As soon as mc shows the very first sign of PMS he will just go “Okay you’re off for the rest of the day.” and will not budge on that claim. He will be damned if he sees mc get hurt by working too hard with a beast of a uterus. Will make the most warm, filling food that puts mc’s gut at ease. Will literally try to do all mc’s work bc he knows she gets more irritated and stressed during PMS but will be sneaky about it so she doesn’t feel bad. Will allow mc to have SOME konpeito to eat through the day to comfort her soul. Will give heavenly massages that will make mc almost cry bc of how relieving it is. Will give mc a warm cloth and change it out frequently so mc has a constant heat source over her murderous organ. Will fret over everything as though mc hasn’t been through this before. “Are you sure you’ll be able to do that?” “I don’t want you to overexert yourself mentally or physically.” Is normally met with mc saying that if she’s been able to deal with school and work since she was a young teen she will be able to manage and knows how to deal w/ it. Boi is just tryna help and is a total worrier but he trusts mc’s judgement while also just watching cautiously with some good herbal tea to soothe mc.

[mengyan]

Sooo i saw you review someones carulia fic befpre so uh heres mine, if i could have some pointers?🥺For context; its supposed to be an angst to fluff comcerning how Carmen & Jules make up following the ACME interruption..

Carmen POV:

The rain relented for no one, not even for those who were in mourning. It was a single drop and a million all at once, thundering down in sheets ftom a confident stormy sky. Carmen Sandiego shivered, the tiny droplets assaulting every shred of skin she had dared to leave exposed.

Her red-brunette hair was drenched a shade darker, now existing as a thick, sopping mass glued to the back of her feverish neck. Carmen’s cheeks were ice cold and slick with water, aside from two thin trails of tears with fading heat.

That was one plus side of being out in the storm, she supposed. It was easy to cry in the rain.

In Carmen’s hands were an arrangement of Peonies and Hydrangeas, the water hammering at their petals. They had been Shadowsan’s suggestion and she took it, because, how the hell would she know what kind of flowers Dexter Wolfe preferred?

The makeshift grave had been Shadowsan’s idea, too. Apparently it would give her closure. Carmen admitted it did, to some extent, help to have some way to mourn her late father. But the fact that she knew his body wasn’t anywhere near his headstone dulled any respite it might have provided.

They had chosen a grave in Poiters, France. It was the only place the team frequented aside from San Diego, and it held the only funeral home that agreed to not ask questions about birth and death records.

Team red hadn’t visited the place in months what with her falling out with Julia and ACME, until today. It was the anniversary of his death, after all.

Carmen’s hands quivered as she lowered the flowers to the wet earth. Tension pulsed in her veins with a thousand emotions flooding through her. She was so, so angry! At the world, at Shadowsan, at Chief, at everyone for taking away what could’ve been a beautiful life with family she now knew nothing of.

She wanted to hurt someone, to scream. And so she did. A guttural roar escaped Carmen’s rouged lips, disappearing into the night. She took a deep breath, trying to calm her erratic breathing. When she looked down, she realized she had crushed the flowers.

Not caring anymore, Carmen plopped down against the headstone, the mud squelching beneath her. Tears began to flow beyond her control and she let them, for once allowing herself to truly feel all the hurt she kept pent up inside in favor of her suave exterior.

Her fingers dug into the earth, and she flung a fistful of mud into the rain. Carmen was tired of running from everything, tired of chasing her past, tired of hiding from the people she cared about.

Maybe the earth’ll open up and swallow me, she mused. Or better yet, maybe I’ll get struck by lightning.

Carmen sighed, moving her back to rest against her father’s grave. “Oh, dad.” She whispered softly. “I’m so sorry.”

The lady in red began to relax despite the rain, curling up in a fetal position and feeling sorry for herself. It wasn’t like Zack, Ivy, Player, and Shadowsan were here to see her so vulnerable, after all.

The sound of two feet approaching caught her attention, their light tread a very familiar sound.

No. It couldn’t be-

The lady in red looked up, her hair strewn haphazardly and her eyes red from crying all while every inch of her body was drenched.

“Miss Sandiego?” There stood Julia Argent with a sky blue umbrella, a mix of horror and concern painted over her delicate features.

“How many times have I told you Carmen is fine?” Carmen whispered as usual, only this time the flirty playfulness was amiss. Her voice was hoarse and raspy, not a sliver of emotion present as she stared dead ahead, right through Julia.

“I’m.....sorry.” The petite woman replied, stressing the underlying meaning.

“What are you doing here, Agent Argent?” Carmen asked tiredly, refusing to call her Jules any longer.

Julia flinched, as if the missing nickname was like a blow to the gut. “Please, you don’t have to be so formal. But, um, I live here, remember? So I think I I should be ask you that.”

“I was just passing through.” The lady in red stood, refusing to meet the other woman’s eyss.

“Where are you going?”

“Anywhere but here.” Carmen said coldly. She couldn’t believe she had ever been stupid enough to begin to trust Julia, much less begin to fall for her. “It’s a long walk to the train station.”

For once, she thought she had someone who believed in her, someone who was on her side wholeheartedly.....and yet...

Stockholm.

“Carmen, you won’t be able to find your way in this weather.” Julia said tentatively, pity filling her beautiful doe eyes to the brim. “Please, um, my apartment isn’t far from here. You can stay until the rain calms down.”

A dark, humorless laugh escaped the Latina’s lips. “What, do all you ACME agents bunk in the same place or something?”

“Excuse me?“

“So they’re waiting for me then,” Carmen continued, her anger and feelings of betrayal peeking into a tirade. “I bet they all have they’re guns propped up at the door already in place. I think I’ll pass, Jules.“

Carmen spit her nickname out like some vile insult she was hurtling at an enemy.

Julia sucked in a sharp breath, sadness touching her features. “Carmen,“ The petite woman began, pleading “I know you won’t forgive me for what happened in Stockholm, but I promise you I didn’t know.“ She paused, waiting for some form of acknowledgement, no response. “I-I told Chief to back off and let me talk to you, she-she said it was okay! I had no idea they were moving in. Please, please Believe me.”

“Oh yeah?“ The woman in red whispered, her voice barely audible over the downpour. “And what if I don’t?“

...

And thats all i have sooo far---

AIJSIDKDKJDKFJDJJSJDFJ OKAY THIS IS LATE BC I WAS NOT IN THE EMOTIONAL HEADSPACE TO DECONSTRUCT THIS BUT. ANON HOW DARE YOU? I AM IN IMMEASURABLE PAIN

i’ll just add notes as i go, thank you for allowing me to read this and offer pointers :D

your descriptions are so good omg!! i love the first sentence SO much?? “the rain relented for no one, not even for those who were in mourning” PHEWWW that’s poetry

i’d say the only thing about the following descriptions is that you don’t have to describe everything, if that makes sense? like, you can leave it as just “a stormy sky” for example. descriptions are amazing, but too much of anything can be harder to read and get your point across!

“it was easy to cry in the rain” anon WHO let you hurt me like this!!!

i feel like if i look up those flowers i will cry so i’m not going to but. shadowsan knowing what flowers to bring is just.... help i’m in pain

NOT THE GRAVE BEING IN POITIERS GOD GIVE ME STRENGTH

instead of “so, so, angry” you can say furious, and replace the exclamation mark with a period. it makes it more solid (if that’s the right word...?)

it’s probably a tumblr formatting thing but italicize the words when it’s her inner thoughts for better distinction!

CARMEN RECOGNIZING JULIA’S FOOTSTEPS

“a mix of horror and concern painted over her delicate features” i’m in LOVE with this wording??

REFUSING TO CALL HER JULES ANY LONGER@,#)&()&)&&)&:&:; LORDDDD

NOT THE. NOT FUCKING STOCKHOLM ANON?? me: brings it up 24/7 and then me when anyone else brings it up: WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS

THE ANGST IS KILLING ME

side note, don’t refer to characters by their race/ethnicity, go with the thief, lady in red, the other girl etc

probably a typo but **their instead of they’re!

“AND WHAT IF I DON’T?” I AM INCONSOLABLE ANON I AM SO SCARED TO READ THE FULL THING WHEN YOU’RE DONE BUT I ALSO CAN’T WAIT AHHHHH THIS ANGST IS SOOO GOOD

thanks again for the submission 🥺💕 i hope my notes were okay!! this was such an emotional journey to read and now i’m going to be fueled by stockholm angst all day when writing <3

[maybeimamuppet]

city of love

hello friends! happy wednesday! this is a request fill for NoaAvrahami6 on Wattpad, who requested the art freaks going on a long vacation/ road trip, and there's a scene to fill a request from aster-alpine on Wattpad (@deadbreadrunning here) who requested them swimming with dolphins :)

also, quick note, I have done absolutely nothing they do in this story, so I apologize for any inaccuracies. I have definitely learned the lesson that is 'write what you know'. I did as much research as my brain could handle and now I know more than I ever wanted to about the Venus de milo.

quick tw for panic attacks, but otherwise, enjoy.

-

Janis is scheming.

Cady is a week away from completing her PhD in mathematics. All she has left to do is defend her dissertation and publish her work, and then she’ll find out if the last four years of work have been worth it. She deserves presents.

Janis has two ideas. The first, is a dog. They have a cat, which Cady had agreed to adopting as a get-well present when Janis had broken her arm several years ago. Elvira is well-loved and very spoiled, but Cady has been begging for a dog. No time like the present. Janis found a reliable rescue breeder who recently had a litter of golden retriever puppies, and would be taking Cady to pick one soon.

Her second idea is a trip. Cady loves to travel, but has been so busy for the last several years that they haven’t gotten an opportunity to go any further than their trips back home to Illinois since their honeymoon in Kenya. Janis has family on her father’s side in France, that she also hasn’t been able to see in several years.

So, she’s booking a flight, also deciding to let Damian come as a surprise. He had recently landed the lead role in a revival of Little Shop of Horrors on Broadway, so he deserves a present too. He doesn’t start rehearsals for another few months, which gives Janis the perfect window of opportunity.

She finds a flight with a few seats available for the evening Cady will (hopefully) receive her degree; a miraculously non-stop flight to Marseille, where her family lives. Janis figures they’ll stop there for a few days, and then travel to Paris to see some of the more iconic sights.

Janis books the tickets, figuring it’ll either be a happy surprise or a consolation trip, and knowing it’s very likely to be the former. She clears her browser history after, in case Cady gets an urge to snoop. Then, she figures she should probably let Damian know to prepare for an international trip in a week.

danis: hey u wanna go to france??

jamian: What did you do

danis: booked us a trip to france

jamian: Janis

jamian: Why

danis: bc my wife becomes a doctor in a week and deserves a gift, and i want you to come. and also bc you got seymour and deserve a gift too

jamian: Oh

jamian: That’s actually really sweet, Jan

danis: it’s my yearly act of goodwill

jamian: I figured lmao

jamian: When are we leaving?

danis: flights on friday at 7, i’ll pick u up. i wanna surprise caddy at her school and then we’ll go right to the airport

jamian: Aww how cute

jamian: Do you need Aaron to watch Ellie?

danis: oh shit yeah i forgot about that

danis: tell him i’ll bring him back whatever he wants as a thank you and a sorry i can’t bring you with us

jamian: U really forgot your whole cat

danis: no!!! i just forgot we can’t bring her!!! i’m a good cat mom!!!!!

jamian: You give her potato chips

jamian: Like on the reg

danis: because she likes them

danis: and i don’t give her enough to hurt her

jamian: Press x to doubt

jamian: Aaron said he’ll cat sit for some chocolates from France and lots of photos

danis: tits i can do that

danis: oh shit caddy’s home i gtg love u

jamian: Love you too tell her I say hi

danis: 📷

“Hey, Peanut, how was your day?” Janis asks gently. Cady lets her exhausted glare answer. “That good, huh? Do you want snuggles?” Cady nods, but signs that she wants to take a shower first. Her day must have been rough if she won’t speak. “Of course, baby, go ahead. I’ll wait for you in the bedroom.”

Cady signs a thank you in return, pecking her gently in greeting and scratching Elvira before heading into the bathroom. Janis decides to go the extra mile today and lights a nice candle in the bedroom, and pulls out a book to read to her. Cady loves the sound of Janis’ voice, so whenever her day has been especially tough they have story time, squeezing in as much of Janis’ voice and good snuggles as they can.

Cady doesn’t return until nearly 45 minutes later, in a set of Janis’ pajamas and with her hair neatly braided over her shoulder. Janis reaches for her, pulling her into a tight cuddle and squeezing gently in case she’s also having a sensory overload.

“Do you wanna talk about it?” She murmurs softly, scratching Cady’s scalp gently in the way that always makes her practically melt in Janis’ lap.

Cady sighs, burying her face in Janis’ chest further. “Just... a lot, today. I have a lot to do, and a lot is riding on this week. I’m gonna be stressed until Friday. And maybe after that, if I don’t make it.”

“You’re gonna make it, baby. You’re a genius, you did two degrees in the time most people do one. And you’ve been working so hard and carefully, I know you’re going to do it. And if you don’t, everybody at that school is catching these hands,” Janis replies.

Cady chuckles at that, finally poking her face out. She grunts slightly as Elvira suddenly jumps onto her back, joining their cuddle puddle happily. “Thanks, Bluejay. You’re... you’ve been the best partner I could’ve asked for, through all of this. I wouldn’t have even made it this far without you.”

“Yes, you would have,” Janis says. “But I’m glad I could be here for you. I love you.”

Cady inches her way up to Janis’ face so as not to disturb the cat snoozing on her back, but makes it and leans in for a kiss. “I love you too. Are you gonna read to me?”

“Yeah, if you want,” Janis replies. “Figured it might cheer you up a bit.”

Cady nods happily, cuddling into her and resting her head on her shoulder. She’s sound asleep before Janis even reaches the third chapter, so Janis sets an alarm and joins her in an impromptu nap.

————-

Cady barely speaks for the next few days, frantically studying, rehearsing, and proofreading everything. Janis is worried, but knows there’s not a lot she can do. She stays out of her way and brings her caffeinated teas and snacks from time to time.

The day before D-Day, Janis makes waffles for dinner, Cady’s favorite. Cady is still at the desk in their bedroom, where she’s been for nearly six days straight.

“Hey,” Janis says gently as she comes to drop off her plate. She usually eats her own dinner on the bed, spending time with Cady as she studies. But this time, Cady snatches her wrist once she sets the plate down and won’t let her leave. “You okay?”

Cady hasn’t looked at her yet, but doesn’t let go of her arm. She just stares at her massive book, clutching Janis’ wrist like a lifeline, like it’s the only thing holding her to Earth. Suddenly, she lets out a choked sob.

“Baby, hey,” Janis says softly. “What’s the matter?”

“I can’t do this, Janis,” Cady cries desperately. “I-I dont-I can’t-“

“Hey, shh,” Janis hushes. “Come here, get away from this for now.” She picks Cady up from her chair and carries her to the bed, letting Cady lock tight around her and sob into her shoulder. “What’s going on?”

“I can’t do it,” Cady wails. “It’s not good enough, and I’m- and I’m out of time, I can’t- I can’t do it!” She suddenly starts crying much harder, and is practically gasping for breath in between sobs.

“Baby, hey, look at me,” Janis insists, cupping her cheeks to look into her eyes. They’re wide and frantic, she looks terrified. She’s having an anxiety attack. Janis quickly tries to remember what she does for her own. The countdown strategy pops into her head, and she decides it’s worth a try. “Focus on me, okay? Tell me five things you can see.”

Cady chokes another sob and clings to her desperately, but manages to splutter out a reply. “Um-um... you-your face, and um-and... um... cat, and... the-and your p-painting, and the cl-the clock, and your tattoos.”

“Good, Butterfly,” Janis says gently. She holds Cady’s face again gently when she tries to look back to the desk. “No, hey, don’t look over there. Tell me four things you can hear.”

“There’s a-there’s a siren, outside,” Cady sobs. “And... and a bird, and... um... you talk-talking, and the-the cat. Chat-chattering.”

“You’re doing good, angel, breathe,” Janis says. “Three things you can feel.”

“Hold-holding me, you-you holding m-me,” Cady chokes. “And the-the bed. ‘S soft. And-and your hair. Tickles.”

“Another breath, baby. Two things you can smell,” Janis coaxes gently.

“Dinner,” Cady whimpers. “And you-your shampoo. Apples.”

“Almost done, baby, what’s something you can taste?” Janis asks, holding her tighter.

“Tea. From earlier,” Cady sniffles.

“Good job, Butterfly. Are you feeling any better?” Janis asks quietly, laying them down and squishing Cady on top of her. Cady nods slightly against her shoulder.

“A little,” she says quietly. She’s still crying, but sounds much less frantic. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry, angel, you have nothing to be sorry for,” Janis says as she kisses her forehead. “Can you tell me what’s happening now?”

Cady takes a deep breath, trying to gather her thoughts. “I’m scared. I’ve had years to get this right, get it perfect. It’s not. I don’t... I’m scared to defend it, what if I mess up, or... stutter or stim too much and I don’t pass?”

“If you don’t pass for stuttering or stimming during your speech then everyone grading you is fucking ableist and I will fight all of them,” Janis growls protectively. “But we can figure something out later if it worries you. And I’m positive your dissertation and thesis are wonderful. You’ve been working so hard, non-stop, for years. It may not be perfect, but if you’ve been doing anything but your best work all these years I’ll be stunned. You’re going to pass, and you’ll be Doctor Heron, and then I have a surprise for you to celebrate.”

“A surprise?” Cady asks quietly with a sniffle. “What did you get?”

“It’s a surprise, Peanut,” Janis chuckles. “You’ll find out tomorrow. But I think you’ll like it.”

“Okay,” Cady says so sadly that Janis wants to spoil everything now. But she manages to resist, knowing her reaction tomorrow will be better. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome, baby. Eat with me, you need a break,” Janis says as she grabs Cady’s plate from the desk. “Bed picnic.”

Cady reaches for her just barely warm waffles. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” Janis says as she leans over for a kiss.

“Can I try to guess what you got?” Cady asks with a bit more energy.

“Sure,” Janis chuckles. “But even if you guess it I’m not gonna tell you.”

Cady groans. “I wanna knoooooow.”

“And you will know tomorrow,” Janis giggles. “Guess away, Butterfly.”

“A puppy?” Cady asks.

Yes, Janis thinks. “No.” She says.

Cady pouts. “Um... did you paint me something?”

“Nope,” Janis chuckles as she takes another bite of her waffles.

“Hm... a... can you give me a hint?” Cady pleads. Janis tries her hardest to resist the puppy eyes.

“Fine, one hint,” Janis groans. The puppy eyes still haven’t lost their magic. “Think bigger.”

“Bigger... um... two puppies?”

“No,” Janis laughs. “Just eat. You’ll find out in less than a day, you can live with not knowing for that long.”

“Fine,” Cady grumbles. She finishes her waffles quietly and cuddles back into Janis. “Can you stay? I need to proofread it again but I don’t want to be alone.”

“Sure, Kitkat. Let me wash the dishes and I’ll be right back,” Janis replies. She rushes through scrubbing their plates and everything clean, then grabs her easel and joins Cady in the bedroom. She paints away while Cady reads, both of them working in comfortable silence. Janis has always loved these moments, where the silence doesn’t need to be filled, and they’re both content to just be with each other.

Cady finishes several hours later, closing her book with a deep sigh. “Jay?”

“Mm?” Janis hums in reply.

“You said we could figure something out. To stop me stimming,” Cady says as she turns to face her.

“I never said I’d stop you stimming,” Janis says, stepping around her easel. “I just meant that we’d find a way to make it less obvious, if you’re so worried about it.”

“Oh.”

Janis reaches for her. “Why are you so worried about it?”

Cady comes to nuzzle into her embrace quietly. “I dunno. It’s... it can be embarrassing, sometimes. I’ve done all this stuff, I’m hopefully about to get my PhD, but I still have to... curl my toes a certain way or flick my hands or fold myself up like a pretzel to get my brain to work like everyone else’s. And people stare, you can tell they think I’m childish.”

Janis hums sadly. “I get it, but it shouldn’t be something to be ashamed of. It doesn’t make you any less professional, or brilliant, it just helps you regulate, right?” Cady nods against her chest. “Yeah. You have all this knowledge in your brain now, it makes sense it needs a little wiggle to help kick it in gear and sort it all out.”

Cady chuckles. “Thanks, Jayjay.”

“And it feels good, remember when I tried all your favorites?” Janis says. “Satisfying.”

“Oh, yeah, it feels so good,” Cady laughs. “But what plan do you have?”

“Pick what you’re gonna wear tomorrow and make sure it has pockets,” Janis replies. “Big ones.”

“Where are you going?” Cady calls as she roots through her closet.

“Nowhere, hang on!” Janis calls back from the living room. She comes back with a necklace, a small cube, and a few other small stim toys she had ordered. Cady looks at them curiously as she pulls out a formal blue jumpsuit and blazer from the closet.

“What are those?” She asks as she rests it on their bed.

“Stim stuff. I made this one,” Janis says as she holds up the cube. “Julie sent me some of her old Legos, and then there’s a spring inside so it’s a little button. And it doesn’t make any noise or anything.”

Cady takes it curiously, pushing the button in the center a few times. “You made this? For me?”

“Yeah, of course. I made this too,” Janis says as she hands over the necklace. “I ordered the charm, it’s a chewy one, and then put the beads on so it’s not, like, obvious it’s a chewy necklace. I figured you could have it on if you wanted, it might help.”

Cady takes the necklace too, gnawing on the charm gently to test it out. Janis thought ahead, the chain is one she can handle. “Thank you, mpenzi.”

“And then I bought these. You can have them in your pocket and use them there, nobody would know if you didn’t want them to. They’d just think you were holding your hands in your pockets,” Janis says rapidly. “Oh, and you can borrow some of my shoes so you have room to move your feet inside, that won’t be noticeable either.”

Cady throws herself at Janis, knocking her backwards onto the bed and kissing her hard. “I love you so much. You’re perfect. Thank you.”

Janis kisses her back just as hard, tangling her hand in her hair and resting the other just above her bum. “You’re welcome, Butterfly. I love you too.”

Cady kisses her again gently, brushing their lips together a few times. “I’m sorry, by the way. I know I’ve been ignoring you this week, you don’t deserve that.”

“Babe, you’ve barely slept this week, and you only eat when I bring you food, I’m more worried about that,” Janis chuckles. “I get the rest of my life with you, wifey. I can handle a week for you to work every now and again. After tomorrow we get to spend more time together again anyway.”

Cady smiles at her. “We’ll do something special. I’m gonna shower, but I wanna cuddle you all night tonight. You’re right, I need more sleep anyway.”

“Okay, Kitkat. Have fun,” Janis says as she pushes her wife towards the en-suite. “I’ll be here.”

-

Janis remembers she forgot to feed Elvira her own dinner when she comes to plop onto her lap.

“Sorry, Ellie, I forgot to feed you,” Janis chuckles as she scratches her ear. “Let’s go.”

Elvira trots off to the kitchen, Janis following quickly behind her. Ellie meows at her when they finally reach the fridge, stretching up to peek in as Janis opens it.

“Hold on, you get a new can tonight,” Janis says in response to Elvira’s questioning chirp. She heads to the closet to grab one, noticing the air mattress on the top shelf they had bought for a camping trip. “Hm.”

Janis scoops out some of her food into her bowl and puts the can in the fridge, then grabs the air mattress from the shelf along with the pump for it.

“God, why is this thing so loud? Some of us have mattresses to blow up in secret,” Janis hisses. Once it’s done, she realizes she probably should have done it outside as she tries to shove it through the door. She grabs some sheets from the closet and the blankets from their bed, making a lovely little nest on their balcony.

Cady comes out of the shower as she’s fluffing the pillows, calling for her as she brushes her hair out.

“Jay? Are you okay? I heard noises,” she says as she comes out wrapped in her bathrobe. “What happened to our bed?”

“I’m fine, put on something warm and come here,” Janis calls from the other room.

“Okay,” Cady says nervously. “What are you up to?”

“God, you set a bunch of chickens loose in a school one time and suddenly you can’t surprise anyone anymore,” Janis jokes. “Just come here, you’re gonna like it.”

“I like your surprises, but you can be a little extra sometimes,” Cady teases. “Oh my god.”

“You like it?” Janis says. “We haven’t been able to do this for a whi-ack!” She grunts slightly as Cady leaps into her embrace, smooching all over her face.

“I love it, and I love you,” Cady says. “So much.”

“I love you more,” Janis teases as she carries her outside.

“No, I love you more,” Cady responds as she’s laid down gently. “I love you most.”

“Mm, you can’t win this fight, Peanut,” Janis hums, getting cut off as Cady pulls her down to kiss her hungrily.

“Then let me show you.”

————-

The next morning, Janis wakes up with Cady (very early) and makes a special breakfast with lots of fruit and protein. Cady eats happily but silently, once again giving a last proofread of all her materials.

Janis gives her a big hug and sweet kiss before she sends her out the door, Cady dressed in her fancy outfit, Janis’ shoes, and with her pockets full of stim toys.

Janis has to pack quickly once she’s gone, carefully but hastily packing their suitcase and carry on bags based on a list she’s incredibly thankful she had the foresight to make.

-

In the late afternoon, Janis picks Damian up in their Uber to Cady’s school to surprise her. He puts his suitcase in the trunk along with what looks to be a poster.

He shakes with excitement as he climbs in next to her, and they both chat excitedly about their plans for France. Before they know it, they’re at Cady’s university and ready to surprise her.

“Aww, you made her a sign?” Janis asks as she finally hugs him.

“Yeah, duh,” Damian says, showing off his ‘Congrats Doctor Heron!’ poster. “And it’s reversible in case of disaster.” He flips it around and shows it says ‘Good job anyway!’ on the other side.

“She’ll love it,” Janis says as she starts bouncing anxiously. “She’ll be happy to see you, too, she doesn’t even know we’re here.”

“Aww. I’m excited to see her reaction, do you remember when you threw that picnic before we graduated high school? That was nothing compared to this and she was so fucking excited,” Damian says.

“Yeah. She’s so cute,” Janis says. Her phone starts ringing suddenly. “Oh, it’s her, this is it.”

Damian squeals as she picks up and switches to speakerphone.

“Jay, I did it!” Cady calls loudly through the speakers. “I did it! I got it, I’m a doctor!”

Janis and Damian both start jumping up at down at the same time. “Congratulations, baby! I’m so proud of you!” Janis says. Damian stays quiet but is visibly trying to hold back his own comments. They see her come bursting out the doors then, running down the steps. “Hey, look to your right. No, other right.”

Cady looks to see her wife and best friend waiting for her and bouncing to get her attention. She runs towards them, laughing happily. “What are you doing here?! Oh my god, you made a sign and everything!”

“This is your surprise!” Janis laughs as her wife jumps into her arms. She spins her around a few times before Cady reaches out for Damian, so he pulls her into another tight hug to congratulate her.

“My best friend is a doctor!” Damian calls loudly as he also spins her around before wrapping her up protectively.

“Why do you guys have suitcases?” Cady asks confusedly, slightly muffled as her face is squished against Damian.

“Because we’re going on a trip!” Janis answers. “I told you to think bigger yesterday, this is it! Our flight is in a few hours, we have to go to the airport.”

“A trip?” Cady squeals happily. “Where are we going?!”

“France,” Janis tries to answer, barely getting the word out before she’s cut off by the most adorable squeal she’s ever heard and her wife leaping into her arms again. “Are you excited?”

“Yes! Of course I’m excited, oh my god!” Cady shrieks. “This is the best day ever!”

“Good! I packed a comfy outfit in your carry on, you can change at the airport,” Janis laughs happily as Cady kisses her over and over.

“Okay, come on! Let’s go, let’s go let’s go! I wanna go to France!” Cady calls, lugging them both towards the parking lot.

Janis and Damian both laugh as they’re dragged away. “Peanut, slow down, we have time.”

“Oh. Oops,” Cady says sheepishly. “But come on, I’m excited, let’s go!”

“We can tell, Cads, just slow down,” Damian pants. “Be excited at a reasonable speed.”

Cady’s bouncing now that they’ve stopped walking, having to get her excitement out somehow. “Janis, carry me, I can’t slow down.”

“Okay, come here,” Janis laughs, carrying Cady piggyback to their next Uber.

————-

Cady heads into the bathroom once they’ve passed security to change out of her formal outfit, but she leaves the necklace on and has the stim toy Janis made for her in her hand. She’s trying to gently stuff her poster in her bag as she walks back. She insisted on keeping it, even though Damian said she didn’t have to. Miraculously, she manages to make it fit without too much damage.

She tugs her carry on backpack back on as she approaches Janis and Damian again. “Where are we going in France?” She asks once they’re back together. Damian also looks at Janis curiously, she hasn’t told him either.

“Marseille, first. My family said we can stay with them for a few days, they have a huge house with tons of rooms. Then we’ll go to Paris and look around there,” Janis says. Cady gives yet another excited squeal and hugs her again. “Do you want Cinnabon’s? They’re right over there.”

“Oh, can we? I haven’t eaten since breakfast, I’m starving,” Cady says. She’s still bouncing and her hands are flapping happily, but she’s calmed down just a touch.

“How-wha-how do you have that much energy on just breakfast?” Damian asks with something akin to awe.

“I’m excited!” Cady almost yells, prompting several glares from those around them. She shrinks into herself slightly in embarrassment. “Oops.”

Damian chuckles. “Let’s go, my treat.” Cady perks up a bit and tugs her wife after them. She happily scarfs down her cinnamon roll and chatters excitedly about France.

They head to their gate to wait for their flight for a while, when Cady suddenly realizes something and scrambles for her phone. “I forgot to tell my parents! What time is it?”

“Almost exactly six,” Janis says. “So five for them.”

“Okay, they should both be home by now,” Cady says with relief. She dials her dad’s number, and he picks up on the first ring. “Hi Dad! Is Mom with you?”

“Hi Cady, she’s in the other room. What’s up?” Her dad replies.

“Get Mom, I wanna tell you together,” Cady insists.

“Okay,” her dad says, slightly confused. “Honey, it’s Cady, she says she has something to tell us.”

“Hello Cady,” her mom calls loudly through the speaker. “How are you, dear?”

“I’m good Mom! How are you?” Cady chuckles. For tech savvy people, they never quite got the hang of speakerphone.

“Good, hon. What’s this news you have?” Her mom replies.

“I got my PhD today! I’m officially a doctor!” Cady says, and quickly has to block the phone speaker with her arm to muffle the volume of their cheers and congratulations. Once it stops vibrating quite so much, she pulls it back to continue talking. “Thanks! Oh, and I won’t be able to call you for a little while. Janis surprised me with a trip to France, we’re going to see her family. And Paris.”

“Oh, that sounds lovely,” her mom sighs. “Take lots of photos for us.”

“I will. I love you guys, bye!” Cady calls, and hangs up before either of them can get off on a tangent and keep her there for an hour. “There.”

“Everything handled?” Damian jokes.

“Yep. Oh, that reminds me, Janis, can you... give me a rundown of your family again? I haven’t quite gotten everyone down,” Cady says shyly. To be fair, Janis has a lot of relatives and their names sound quite similar in a lot of cases.

“Yeah,” Janis chuckles. She knows Damian probably needs a refresher too, the last time he got to come visit everyone was in high school. “My homophobic great-grandma finally died when I was in college so we don’t have to worry about her anymore.”

“Jay! Be nice,” Cady scolds. She’d heard bad stories about the woman, but speaking ill of the dead still doesn’t sit right with her.

“I’m just saying. Anyway, Nana Annette is her daughter, my grandma. She’s, like, eighty-five, but she’s chill. She might say some offensive stuff because she’s either senile or just old, but she means well most of the time. Her husband died when I was a baby, I barely remember him, so hopefully he won’t be around. Then there’s the aunts and uncles.”

Cady pulls out her phone to take notes, this is where things get dicey.

“Jean-Luc is the oldest, he’s the funny one. His wife is Béatrice, she’s... tense, but nice. The next one is Charlotte, she’s the single one who I’m convinced is a closet lesbian, you remember? She’s hella rich and just shows up sometimes with presents. Anyway. Next is Gabrielle, and her husband Charles, he’s the English guy. My dad was next, then Phillipe is the youngest, and his wife is Jeanne.”

Cady blinks, already terrified. “And your cousins?”

“They’ll understand if you don’t remember them all, don’t worry,” Janis chuckles. “Jean-Luc and Béatrice have Josephine and Jacques, they’re twins. Then they had Annalise, and then Luca, they named him after my dad. Gabrielle and Charles have Bella, Celeste, and Clara, Celeste is a bitch but the other two are nice. Jeanne and Phillipe have Emile and Sylvie.”

“Jesus Christ,” Cady groans, trying to keep everyone under wraps.

“Some of my cousins have babies too now, do you want their names?” Janis teases. “Don’t worry about it, guys. They’ll understand and I’ll make sure you learn everyone’s names. And we probably won’t see all of them, either.”

“Oh, babies? Yay,” Cady says. “I might as well learn them too.”

“Yeah, there’s a few that are still actual babies. Josephine and her husband just had Hugo a few months ago, and then she has Anabelle and Charlise, they’re like... four,” Janis says. “And then Bella has Benjamin, he’s a year old or so.”

“Aww. Okay. I’ll have to study on the plane,” Cady says, sending her list to Damian and shutting her phone off.

“Little Slice, no, I’ll study for us and fill you in,” Damian says. “You’ve studied too much in your life. Doctor.”

Cady smiles at the reminder of her new title. “Fine. Oh, is that us?”

Janis listens to the voice ringing out over the PA system. “Yeah. They’re not boarding us quite yet, but we should be ready.”

“Oh, yay!” Cady says happily.

—————

Once they finally board, Cady begs to have the window seat. Janis and Damian are both afraid of heights and let her have it willingly.

Cady wiggles happily as the light comes on to fasten their belts, looking happily out the window as they prepare to take off. Janis pops some gum in her mouth, and offers a piece to both her travel buddies. Cady takes hers and then takes Janis’ hand, squeezing it to comfort her. Janis squeezes back thankfully.

Cady offers her one ear of the headphones she has so they can watch a movie together. Janis takes it and rests her head on Cady’s shoulder, flipping up the arm rest and cuddling into her wife. Damian flips up his own and lies down over both of them, his head ending up in Cady’s lap as he does his own thing on his phone. Cady just laughs and plays with his curly hair.

After three movies, Cady falls asleep with her head on Janis’ shoulder. They’re about four and a half hours into their seven hour flight, and it is now around Cady’s bedtime. Janis finds Damian also asleep on their legs, and decides to let him stay even though hers are going a bit numb.

She turns her head slightly to kiss Cady’s hair, thinking about the events of the day. Twenty-four hours ago she had fallen asleep on an air mattress on their balcony after a wild night, held securely in the arms of her favorite redhead. Now, she’s several thousand feet in the air, cuddled up with two of her favorite people on their way to another country. Life is a hell of a thing.

—————

Janis is startled awake by the announcement that they’re about to land, and wakes Damian and Cady so they can fasten their seatbelts again. It’s about two in the morning according to their body clocks, so they all blink groggily and rub at their eyes.

“Janis?” Cady asks suddenly as they start to descend.

“Hmm?” Janis hums exhaustedly.

“Who’s watching Elvira?”

“Aaron,” Janis yawns. “He just wants chocolate as payment.”

“Mmkay,” Cady hums. The plane finally touches down and she gives an exhausted “Yay.”

Janis chuckles. “Come on, my cousin is picking us up and then we can sleep in a real bed for a while.”

“Which one?” Damian yawns.

“Annalise,” Janis replies. “She’s a morning person, she’s the only one they trusted to come get us.”

They trudge through baggage claim and out of the airport, down a long line of cars waiting to pick people up. Suddenly, a clear “Janis!” rings out with a brisk French accent.

Janis greets her cousin, who laughs at their exhausted faces. “Bonjour, Anna.”

They have a quick catch up in French as they load all their bags into the car, and Damian’s eyes suddenly go wide.

“What happened?” Cady asks in concern.

“Nothing,” Damian says hastily. “I... forgot they’d actually speak, like, French here. I thought I was just too tired to understand them for a second.”

They both laugh as they climb in, Cady squished in the middle since she’s the smallest. She’s not complaining, this way her head will land on someone’s shoulder when she inevitably falls asleep again.

—————

She wakes up several hours later in a soft bed in a room she doesn’t recognize, spooning Janis. She checks the adjusted time on her phone and finds it to be about one in the afternoon, which isn’t terrible. They have a few hours left in the day to get things settled.

She leans down to kiss behind Janis’ ear as lightly as she can, murmuring a quiet “J’taime tellement,” into her ear before cuddling back into her wife. Apparently she wasn’t quite gentle enough, because Janis stirs and turns to face her with a grin.

“J’taime aussi, mon papillon,” Janis hums as she leans in for a kiss. “How did you sleep?”

“Pretty well, I don’t even remember getting here,” Cady replies.

“I carried you in, you looked exhausted,” Janis says. “What time is it?”

“Just after one,” Cady says as she strokes through Janis’ short hair. “I still love this haircut.”

“I can tell,” Janis chuckles as she cuddles in closer. “You don’t miss the blonde, though?”

“I do,” Cady hums thoughtfully. “But this length is so satisfying to play with. And your shave is in an easier place to reach now.”

Janis had continued sporting the side shave, and stretched it to an undercut at the back of her head as well when she cut the blonde off. Cady loves running her fingers over the buzzed areas, and Janis certainly doesn’t complain.

“Guess I’ll keep it like this then. Should we go get Damian?” Janis says as she leans in for another sweet kiss. “Can’t let him sleep too much longer.”

“Yeah. Are we doing anything today?” Cady asks as she follows Janis out of bed.

“I don’t really have anything planned from this point, I just figured we’d walk around and if you find something you want to do, we’ll do it. But maybe we should start tomorrow,” Janis replies. “Nana’s definitely gonna throw some family reunion type thing tonight and make a shit ton of food, we should save our energy for that.”

“Aww. That sounds fun,” Cady says. “But also tiring, you’re right.”

“They are usually pretty fun,” Janis hums. “And Charlotte is coming, she tells good stories, you’ll like those.”

“Is she the one who told that story about the time you fell into that lake and came back to a picnic totally drenched and told me to watch you around water at our wedding?” Cady asks.

“Yeah,” Janis mumbles sheepishly. “I can show you that lake, if you want. It’s nearby.”

Cady nods excitedly. “Of course. Oh, and hey, guess what?”

Janis turns from the door she’s approaching to leave their little room. “What?”

“I love you,” Cady says, pulling her down for a kiss. Janis has to fight a squeal.

“I love you too,” she replies after a second. “I’m so proud of you.”

“Thank you,” Cady whispers against her lips. “I don’t say it enough, but I’m proud of you too. I want this trip to celebrate all of us. Not just me and Damian. You deserve this too.”

“Okay,” Janis whispers back. “Thanks.”

Cady chuckles. “You promise you’ll tell me if you see something you want to do, too?”

Janis kisses her soundly one more time. “I promise.”

“Good. Let’s go get D,” Cady says with a final peck.

“Okay.”

—————

“Damian!” Janis calls as she leaps onto his bed.

“Cheese and crackers!” Damian yelps, throwing himself to the ground. “Janis!”

“Jay, I swear to god,” Cady groans from the doorway. “That is not what I meant by ‘wake him up’.”

“It worked though,” Janis says as she helps him up. “Morning!”

Damian glares at her. “Hello, Jan. Is it actually morning?”

“No, it’s almost two in the afternoon,” Cady replies. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine,” Damian says as he brushes himself off.

“Good. Janis says there’s gonna be some sort of big dinner thing, can you help me study everyone?” Cady asks.

“Yeah,” Damian answers.

“Oh, hold on a second,” Janis says, running from the room. She returns with a framed photo of her whole family from a few years ago. “Here. It’s old, but everyone looks pretty much the same.”

Janis sits in between them and points everyone out so they can match names to faces. Cady looks a bit overwhelmed, but eventually can point everyone out.

“I’m gonna go shower, if you stay here nobody will bother you guys,” she says once her part is done. “Have fun.”

-

By the time Janis is put together enough for a family gathering, Cady and Damian know all her relatives by name and how they relate to one another. Janis is kind of touched that they both put so much effort into learning everyone in her family.

She hadn’t quite been expecting every member of her family to show up, but they all make an appearance at some point. Cady isn’t big on crowds and Damian hasn’t spoken French since high school, so they both stick around her throughout the meal.

Her aunt Charlotte shows up fashionably late as always, with gifts for the three of them. She greets Janis with a hug and hands her a set of incredibly expensive oil paints, and then looks around for Cady.

“Where is the doctor one?” She asks in fluent but heavily accented English. Cady peeks up from where she’s crowded by all of the younger cousins, coming over to say hello.

“Bonjour,” she says shyly. Charlotte greets her and hands over her gift, which looks to be a tasteful diamond bracelet. Cady frantically leans in to whisper to Janis. “I can’t take this, this had to have cost at least a thousand euro.”

Charlotte, evidently, hears her whispers and laughs. “Nonsense, Cady darling. You are smarter than anyone here, you deserve my money even more than my dear Janis. I am glad she is spoiling you.”

Cady blinks a few times, before begrudgingly accepting her beautiful gift. “Thank you, it really is beautiful.”

“But of course. Now where is darling Damian?” Charlotte responds. Damian comes over from the kitchen to say hello as well, and gets a very soft cashmere sweater.

-

Janis struggles to guide her wife and friend through a family dinner, and Cady collapses on their bed by the time they’re excused.

“Did your dad actually punch your great-aunt in the stomach?” She asks with a slight chuckle. “Just, like, no warning, full force?”

“I’ve heard that story from a minimum of five relatives, so I think it’s probably true,” Janis responds. “But he was only about five. And I think the stories explain a lot.”

“Do you miss him?” Cady asks quietly. “Your dad?”

“Yeah,” Janis says. “But I don’t think I miss him in the same way you miss your brother. Like, I wish I had gotten to know my dad, and I wish I had grown up with a decent father figure. But I didn’t really get to know him well enough to miss him as a person.”

Cady hums empathetically. “From what I’ve heard, you’re a lot like him anyway. But I wish those things too.”

“Thanks,” Janis mumbles. “I’ll take you around town tomorrow, we can see all the places from the stories.”

“Okay,” Cady grins. “J’taime.”

Janis smiles back as she cuddles into her wife. “J’taime aussi. Bonsoir.”

————-

The next morning, they both wake around eleven, starting to adjust to the time difference. Janis takes both Cady and Damian on a walk around the nearby area.

Cady laughs happily as Janis explains stories and where they happened, pointing out the shop where her mother met her father, the lake she had fallen into as a child, the tree her aunt had carved every family member’s initials into.

Cady stays behind for just a second at the shop, brushing a hand over the wall to thank it for sparking the events that gave her her beloved. She can almost feel the history inside.

For the time of year, it’s a remarkably cool day, and once they’ve stopped for a quick break Cady and Damian both ask to keep going. They go a bit farther than they had anticipated, into a larger area of the city.

Damian wanders off for a second, having spotted a sign on a building nearby. “Cads, come here, you read French better than me.”

Cady approaches, leaving Janis behind for a moment to join him. “Swim with... I don’t remember this word.”

“Dolphins,” Janis says suddenly from behind them, making them both jump.

“Swim with dolphins?” Cady asks. “Oh, that sounds fun! Can we, Jayjay? Pleeeeease please please?”

“Of course, Butterfly,” Janis says with a grin. “I’ll see what they have for tomorrow.”

“Oh, yay!” Cady squeals, hugging Janis tightly. Damian just cocks an eyebrow at them and joins the hug.

—————

Janis has to pin Cady to the bed to get her to sleep that night. But somehow by morning, their positions are reversed. Janis wakes up to her wife happily straddling her back, drumming her hands against her cheeks to wake her up.

“Caddy. What are you doing?” Janis groans sleepily.

“It’s dolphin day! I’m waking you up,” Cady responds far too brightly for eight in the morning. Janis grabs and pulls her back to cuddle.

“Go back to sleep,” Janis grumbles. “G’night.”

“Fine,” Cady chuckles. She should’ve known better, Janis never would’ve woken up this early anyway. She’s too excited to go back to sleep herself, so she rolls onto her side and watches Janis sleep. It’s rare that she’s awake when Janis isn’t, so she tries to memorize the way Janis looks while she sleeps whenever she gets the chance.

-

Janis finally stirs about two hours later, smiling as she sees her wife looking at her. She kisses her gently before she stretches. “Did you go back to sleep?”

“No,” Cady says. “I’m too excited.”

“You’re too cute,” Janis says, voice still rough with sleep. “It’s not ‘til three, babe.”

“Ugh,” Cady groans. She rolls on top of Janis again, straddling her front this time. She leans down to squish her face against Janis’ neck. Janis feels more than hears the words, “I wanna see them. Dolphins are so cute.”

Damian comes in then to get them up for breakfast. “Y’all-whoa! Okay bye.”

“Dame, come back! We’re not doing anything,” Janis calls. “I’m not that stupid.”

“I wouldn’t put it past you,” Damian grumbles. “Breakfast is ready, your grandma made crepes.”

“Ooh!” Cady squeals, flying out of bed to get ready. Janis follows quickly, pushing Damian out the door so they can get dressed.

-

Cady eats more happily this time, now that she’s not surrounded by quite so many people. But now Janis has to keep her occupied until they get to go to the dolphins.

Cady is chattering excitedly, and poor Damian still looks exhausted. Janis knows he’s excited too, dolphins are his favorite animal, but he’s very much not a morning person. Janis isn’t quite awake herself. Time for some drastic measures.

“Peanut, do you want to look at some old pictures? I know Nana has some around here somewhere,” she says, griping internally.

“Like baby pictures?” Cady says excitedly. “Lemme at ‘em.”

“Stay here. I’ll be back,” Janis grumbles. She returns a few minutes later with a photo album. “This is from just before we moved to America, I think.”

Cady makes grabby hands for the book and flips excitedly to the first page. Damian perks up a little and sits on her other side. Cady coos when baby Janis makes an appearance.

“Your little cheeks! Oh my god,” Cady squeals.

“Have you not seen any old pictures of Janis before?” Damian asks in confusion.

“Not this little, the only ones she’s let me see are from five and up,” Cady says as she turns to the next page. This one features baby Janis chewing on one of her feet. “Oh my god, look at you.”

“I’ve seen them, Cads, I’m good,” Janis chuckles. Cady flips the page again to one of her dad holding her.

“Is this your dad?” Cady asks quietly. Janis nods with a grin.

“Yeah,” she says. Cady looks back and forth between the photo and her wife.

“You look like him,” Cady says after a moment. “Dame, look at their jawlines. And-oh, Jay, smile. See? Exactly the same.”

“Shit, yeah,” Damian says, looking back and forth. “And the... is it their noses?”

“Yes! That’s what it is,” Cady says. Janis is confused, but happy that there’s such a strong resemblance. “My god, you were so cute!”

“Were?” Janis jokes.

“Oh, shush. You’re always on my case for calling you cute,” Cady says, gently flicking her ear.

“Yeah, yeah. I need to go shower, y’all can keep looking if you want,” Janis says, gesturing to Damian behind Cady’s back to keep her busy. He nods.

—————

By the time they’re outside the dolphin place, Cady and Damian are holding hands and bouncing up and down in excitement.

“Come on, dorks, let’s see some dolphins,” Janis says as she leads them into the massive building. It spans the area of several blocks, and a vast majority of it are large tanks and pools.

A lady welcomes them at the main desk and introduces herself as Bernadette, handing over their life jackets and taking them on a short tour. Upon seeing the slight confusion on Damian’s face, she switches to English and explains how they take care of the dolphins.

Cady looks relieved when she explains that the only dolphins here are ones that wouldn’t survive in the wild, and that they do rescues to help injured ones to eventually release back into the ocean. The tanks are absolutely massive with plenty of room to swim, and the water is kept at the perfect temperature.

Finally, they’re lead outside to one of the massive pools, and Cady gives a quiet squeal when she sees the dolphins swimming around happily. Damian follows Bernadette into the water first, yelping at the cold temperature.

“Ooh, it’s cold!” Cady squeals, walking around on her tippy toes until she gets used to it. The three dolphins suddenly swim over, sort of circling around her curiously. “Oh, hello.”

Janis follows after Cady, but the dolphins won’t leave her wife to greet anyone else.

“They seem to like you,” Bernadette chuckles. She swims over to introduce them. “This is Poséidon, and Daphné, and this here is Corail.”

She gives a command and one by one, the dolphins pop up on their tails and wave to them. Cady squeals when she gets splashed as they go back down, but claps for them at their impressive trick.

Bernadette guides them over to Damian with a bit of effort, and gives another command for Corail to pop up and kiss his cheek. He gasps in surprise since the command was in French, but chuckles at the sensation. “Aww! Bonjour, Corail!”

“Is that the first girl you’ve kissed, D?” Janis jokes.

“Actually, yeah,” Damian says. “Except you.”

“Whoa whoa whoa, what?” Cady insists. “When did that happen?”

“We were like, eleven, and trying to work out if we were actually gay so we kissed one time,” Janis explains quietly. “And we agreed not to talk about it again, Damian.”

Cady is laughing so hard she’s only held up by the life jacket, forgetting to tread water to keep herself afloat. “That’s so cute. Oh, bonjour!” She says when the dolphins return to her side.

“You may pet them if you like,” Bernadette says, pretending she didn’t hear the story. “All of you can.”

Cady happily reaches out to brush a hand over their smooth backs, in awe at the sensation. “Ooh! They’re so smooth! That’s so cool. Guys, come feel them!”

Janis and Damian swim over to pet them too, and Janis yelps a little when she first makes contact. “Oh, that’s weird!”

“They’re so cute,” Damian coos. “It’s a really nice feeling.”

“Their skin regenerates almost every two hours to help maintain the texture,” Bernadette explains. “Much faster than humans, to say the least.”

“They feel like wet rubber,” Janis says. “They are cute though.”

“Many people say that, that is a good way to describe it,” Bernadette laughs. She gives another command and Poséidon pops up and kisses Janis on the cheek. Janis yelps slightly and jumps back, but swims close again when Cady reaches for her. “Oh, I should have warned you, I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine,” Janis chuckles. “Bonjour, Poséidon.”

He pops up again, seemingly waiting for something. Bernadette laughs. “He wants you to kiss him back.”

“Little man-whore,” Janis grumbles, but leans in to smooch his beak. Cady leans in on the other side too, prompting an excited chirp as he swims a happy lap around the pool.

Corail and Daphné seem jealous and also pop up for kisses from Cady, who obliges with a delighted laugh. They chirp happily and kiss Cady’s cheek in return.

“Aww, you have competition, Jay,” Cady coos.

“You’re gonna leave me for a fish?” Janis calls.

Cady gasps indignantly. “They are mammals.”

“Whatever, they live in water and don’t have legs, they’re close enough. You’re gonna leave me for a water-dwelling mammal?” Janis pouts.

“Of course not,” Cady says. “Come back, they’re sorry.”

Janis swims her way back over for a kiss from her wife. “You taste like dolphin.”

Cady laughs. “So do you, fish face. What happens now?”

“They can tow you around the pool by their fins, if you’re interested,” Bernadette offers.

“Does it hurt them?” Cady asks worriedly.

“Not at all, they actually seem to rather enjoy it,” Bernadette responds. “You only add a touch more pressure to the fin, if you don’t grab it too hard.”

“Oh. Yeah, that sounds fun!” Cady cheers. Bernadette shows them all how to gently hold the fins, each of them getting their own dolphin. Damian gets Poséidon, Cady gets Corail, and Janis gets Daphné. Once they’re all securely but carefully holding on, Bernadette gives a cue and the three of them set off. They go slower than Janis had thought they would, but she’s grateful that she’s not getting splashed or lugged underwater.

“Ooh. This is nice,” Damian says, cuddling into Poséidon a little closer. “Relaxing.”

Janis paid a fair sum for this experience, but she thinks it’s worth it for the tow. It is quite relaxing, and Cady is laughing brightly the whole way.

“That was so fun!” Cady calls when they’re done.

“I’m glad! If you would bid the dolphins a quick adieu, we can now move on to the shore activities,” Bernadette replies. She leads them out of the tank and offers them each a towel, and they return their life jackets as they dry off.

Once they’re not dripping anymore they follow Bernadette inside to a kitchen area, and are immediately confronted with the smell of fish. Damian has to tap out and waits for the girls outside. Bernadette greets and has a quick chat with her co-worker in French before grabbing a couple buckets of prepared fish and heading back out of the room.

“My apologies for the smell, but you get used to it after a while,” Bernadette says to Damian. He nods shakily and follows them back to the dolphins. They all rush up when they spy the buckets, almost begging like little dogs for a treat.

“Aww,” Cady coos. “Water puppies.”

Janis links their fingers together and leads them to the edge. Bernadette explains that she’ll have them do tricks, and then if they want to, the three of them will get to feed them the fish as a reward. Damian sits far away from the smelly buckets, opting to just watch.

Bernadette gives the first command and the three of them all hop up and wave their fins, and they wave back happily. Cady and Janis toss each of them a few of the small fish. She gives another cue and they turn away, facing lengthwise down. They pick some speed up and suddenly leap into the air, diving a couple times.

“Holy shit!” Janis yelps at the height they can get. “That’s impressive.” Cady and Janis toss them more fish.

Bernadette continues giving cues, prompting the dolphins to dance, come up for pets, shake hands, give more kisses, and even hop up next to them on the shore for a split second. Cady even gets to play fetch with Poséidon for a while with a small ball.

Once they’re down to about a quarter of the last bucket of fish, Bernadette stops giving the dolphins commands. They swim around the area contently, calming down after the exercise.

“Now, I understand you are an artist, Janis?” Bernadette asks, heading to a nearby cart.

“Um... yeah,” Janis says anxiously. “Kind of.”

“Nonsense,” Bernadette chuckles. “Your wife tells me you are very good.”

Janis looks at Cady in confusion. “Does she?”

“You are! You teach art to kids, for the love of god,” Cady says. “Just wait, this is awesome. You’re gonna love it.”

Bernadette chuckles and heads to a nearby cart of supplies, returning with several pieces of paper, brushes, and a few colors of non-toxic paint.

“Our friends here enjoy art as well, you all get to help them create their next masterpiece,” Bernadette says. Janis looks very excited. She got to paint with elephants in Kenya, so she’s excited to do art with another animal.

Bernadette places the brushes into a sort of hoop shaped thing, and instructs them to pick what colors they want for the paintings. Janis picks purple, blue, and grey; Cady picks yellow, pink, and green; and Damian picks black, pink, and orange.

The colors are squeezed into pallets, and they dip the brushes into the paint. Then, the hoop attachments are slipped gently over the beak of the dolphins, and they’re instructed to hold the canvas over the dolphins’ heads. All three wag the brushes back and forth, making bright streaks on the canvas.

The process is continued until all three colors are used up and the canvases are mostly covered, then they turn to see the beautiful works of art the creatures have made for them. It’s rather abstract, obviously, but they are very beautiful.

Unfortunately they now have to say goodbye to the dolphins. They kiss and pet each one before they have to go, waving goodbye sadly. Janis buys all of the photos taken of their experience, and also buys each of them a commemorative shirt and a stuffed dolphin from the gift shop.

Cady and Damian are both still shaking with adrenaline as they head home, chatting excitedly about their favorite parts. Once they get there, though, they start to crash. Cady’s almost totally asleep by the time they make it through the door.

Janis carries her up the stairs, Damian following closely behind them. He slugs his way to his own room, all of them deciding to take a nap before dinner. Janis has to wake Cady to get her out of her swimsuit, and Cady just tugs on Janis’ dolphin t-shirt and flops into bed, crawling under the covers and cuddling her stuffed dolphin.

Janis changes into other comfortable clothes since her shirt was stolen and crawls in after her, spooning her wife gently. She’s not quite tired enough to sleep, so she contents herself with holding her girl and remembering all the fun they had.

——————

A few days later, they head to Paris. Janis’ grandmother threw yet another dinner for them to celebrate, and insisted they come back for another visit soon. Cady promises they will, and Janis agrees.

Janis’ cousin takes them to the train station to see them off that afternoon. It’s about a six hour trip, so they’ll be at their hotel at around seven in the evening. Cady looks out the window the whole way, and Damian looks a bit green. He’s never been great with motion.

“So what do you want to see in Paris, Bluejay?” Cady asks, munching happily on the croissant she had gotten off the cart.

“The Louvre,” Janis replies instantly. “More than anything. And the Eiffel tower, I guess.”

“Oh, I would love to go to the Louvre,” Cady says happily. She’s interested in the art there, of course, but she loves seeing Janis in her element. “I’m excited to eat.”

“You’ll get plenty of opportunities,” Janis chuckles. “What about you, what do you want to see, Peanut?”

“I want to see the historical stuff. Like the Palace of Versailles and the Arc de Triomphe and stuff,” Cady replies. “Dame? You okay?”

“Mmhmm,” Damian hums. He’s looking better now that he’s eaten. “I just want to go to Disneyland.” Cady suddenly looks very excited.

“I forgot about Disneyland! That would be so fun,” she squeals. They’ve managed to get Cady caught up on Disney movies and shows, but haven’t had a chance to take her to any of the parks yet. Now they have to go.

Finally, a lady’s voice announces their stop, so they all hop up and grab their bags. Once they’re above ground again, Janis barely manages to get them a cab to their hotel. Cady gets stuck in the middle again, but keeps leaning over them so she can see out the windows.

“It’s so pretty,” she sighs happily. She spins around as they’re dropped outside their hotel, staring up at the sky. It is rather beautiful, with the city bathed in the light from the setting sun.

Janis leads them in and checks them in to their rooms. She’d booked Damian one on a different floor, for his own sake. They are in the city of love, after all. Janis plans to make full use of it.

Cady enters the room first, immediately rushing over to the window. “Jay, come here.”

Janis comes up behind her, kissing her cheek and hugging her from behind. “It’s beautiful. That’s the top of the Eiffel tower over there.”

Cady turns in her embrace. “It is beautiful. But not as beautiful as you.” She giggles as Janis blushes. “I love you so much. Thank you for bringing us here.”

“I love you too, Butterfly. I’m glad I could. What did you think of Marseille?” Janis asks, pulling Cady next to her on the large bed.

“It was beautiful,” Cady replies. “And your family is... so lovely. I loved hearing all the stories and seeing the places that are important to your family. It was wonderful.”

“Good,” Janis grins as Cady leans up to kiss her. “Should we get D and find somewhere for dinner?”

“Oh, yes! Can we walk? It’s so nice out,” Cady replies, dragging Janis up by the hand and towards the door.

“We should change first, but sure, baby,” Janis says. “Come on.” They put on fancier clothes and Janis switches their positions, running down the long hallway towards the elevator and hauling her laughing wife behind her. The doors close behind them as they both try to catch their breath. Janis brushes her hands through Cady’s curls to smooth them back down. “Have you ever had escargot?”

Cady pulls a slightly concerned face. “No. Those are snails, right?”

“Yeah. They’re not bad, though, I think you’ll like them,” Janis replies. The doors open when they reach Damian’s floor. Janis leads them to his door and knocks. “D, we’re gonna go get dinner, do you want to come?”

He answers the door already wearing the hotel robe and with a sheet mask on. “Can I have a second?”

Both girls laugh and nod. Janis sighs when the door closes again. “We’ve been here for ten minutes.”

“It’s Damian,” Cady giggles in reply. “And skincare is important.” Damian comes back fully dressed and sans mask. Cady grabs his hand as well and leads them both back to the elevator.

Janis finds a restaurant within walking distance that has very highly rated escargot. She knows Damian hasn’t had it either, and wants to know what they’ll think of it.

-

They get to the place right as dinner service is beginning, and are led over to a table.

“They’re all so close together,” Cady says, having to wiggle her way in.

“They have a lot of people to fit in,” Janis replies. “Just how it happens here.”

“I’m glad we changed. Everyone here is so fancy,” Damian mumbles.

They continue making light conversation as they wait for the food Janis ordered to arrive. Finally it arrives, and Cady and Damian look more than a little concerned.

Janis pops some of the snails out of their shells, eating one herself and offering the others to Damian and Cady. They take them, looking to each other for confidence and eating them.

“Oh!” Cady says. “Thats way better than I thought, that’s so good! Way better than snake meat.”

“I told you,” Janis laughs.

“It’s like ravioli,” Damian says as he reaches for another. “But... snails.”

“Yeah, that’s a good way to put it,” Cady giggles. “How do you get them out?” Janis shows her how to use the fork to pop them out, and Cady follows suit once she knows how.

-

Many hours later, Cady cuddles up to Janis in bed, finally ready for sleep. “How long are we here, Jay?”

“We’re in Paris for a week,” Janis replies.

“A week?!” Cady says in shock.

“I wanted to make sure we had time to see everything you both wanted to,” Janis says. “And I have another surprise when we get home. But that’s kind of for both of us.”

“Jay, you’re spoiling me,” Cady whines. “Can I know the other surprise?”

“Nope,” Janis hums. “But I’ll tell you right once we’re back in America. And you deserve to be spoiled, Peanut. You’re a doctor, you’ve worked so hard.”

Cady grins at her. “Fine. Will you tell me what we’re doing tomorrow?”

“I don’t have anything planned,” Janis says. “What do you want to do?”

“The Louvre,” Cady replies with a smile. “I want you to tell me all about everything. I won’t even need a tour guide.”

Janis smiles back, leaning down for a kiss. “Sounds like a plan.”

Cady cuddles in close, nuzzling into her chest. “I love you, darling.”

“I love you too, Butterfly. Sweet dreams,” Janis replies, holding her closer.

————-

Janis wound up being the one with trouble sleeping that night, struggling to fall asleep and waking up early. She decides to return the favor Cady pulled on the dolphin day.

Cady, as always, is asleep on her belly, so Janis rolls to straddle her back at her waist and drums on her shoulders. Cady gives a sleepy groan and pops an eye open to look at her.

“Jay.” She grumbles crankily. “Wha’ you doin’.” Janis leans down to kiss her cheek and around her ear.

“Good morniiiiiing,” she hums. “It’s Louvre day, I’m waking you up!”

Cady groans into her pillow. “Go back ‘sleep.”

“No, I’m too excited!” Janis says. “Come on, don’t you at least want breakfast?”

“Wan’ sleep more,” Cady moans. She shifts and Janis falls off her with a yelp, thudding to the ground.

“Hmph. I see how it is,” Janis grumbles. “Fine, you can sleep in, cranky pants.”

“Thank youuuu,” Cady calls into her pillow, and is snoring gently again within minutes.  Janis giggles and slides back into bed, stroking a curl away from Cady’s face and watching her sleep. She is actually too excited to go back to sleep, so she decides to make slightly better use of her time.

She heads to her carry on bag and pulls out the sketchbook and pencils she had brought along, before opening the window to sketch their view. She flips past the ones she did of Marseille to a blank page. The rooftops seem to stretch for miles, and she can just spy the top of the famous tower a ways away.

Cady groans sleepily behind her as she’s finishing shading in the skyline, rolling over onto her back and throwing her arms over her head. Janis decides she needs to work on sketching people more. She perches herself on top of the wardrobe and sketches her life, smiling lovingly at the little snuffling noises she makes every now and again.

“G’morning,” Cady groans as she finally wakes up, stretching and yawning before rubbing her eyes.

“Morning, sleepyhead,” Janis chuckles, hopping down as Cady reaches for her. “How did you sleep?”

“Good, until someone sat on me,” Cady says, glaring at Janis.

“Just returning the favor,” Janis chuckles. “Let’s go get breakfast.”

“No way. You haven’t kissed or cuddled me yet, you’re not going anywhere,” Cady demands, pulling her back.

Janis laughs and cups her face, leaning in to press their lips together. “Can that hold you over until we eat?” Cady leans in for one more sweet kiss.

“I suppose.”

—————-

Janis takes Cady and Damian to a nearby bakery for some breakfast croissants. All of them eat outside, enjoying the way the whole street seems to smell like fresh bread and baking sweets.

Cady asks to walk again, wanting to see as much of the city as she can. Surprisingly, Damian agrees, even though he’s never been one for much physical activity. The Louvre isn’t particularly close by, but Janis also agrees to a walk. Saves having to pay for a cab.

“Shit,” Janis murmurs in awe when they finally reach their destination. “It’s big.”

“It says here it’s seventy-three thousand square meters,” Cady says, holding up her phone. “So yes, it is very big.”

“Very astute observation there, Janjan,” Damian teases. “Let’s go in, come on.”

“They have tours, should we do that?” Janis asks, pointing to a sign.

“We don’t need to,” Cady says, lacing their fingers together. “We have you.”

-

Once they’re past the impossibly long line to get in, Janis instantly heads off, hauling Cady and Damian behind her. She follows the signs to the area with the Mona Lisa first, knowing there’s going to be a large crowd for them to work through to see it up close.

“Wow,” Damian says when they make it in. There is a massive crowd in front of it, but they can still just barely see. Except Cady.

“Hang on,” Cady grumbles, grabbing their hands and somehow weaseling her way through all the people until they’re at the front. “There. Short people tricks.”

“Nice, babe,” Janis says, staring in awe at the famous painting in front of her. She rattles off all the facts about it she can remember from her years of study, before they move on to look at other things.

“Oh, that’s in Animal Crossing!” Cady says happily, pointing to a painting nearby. “What is this, lovey?”

Janis laughs at her excitement over finding the real versions of something from her favorite game. “That’s called The Summer. This guy did a few like that, with the faces made out of fruit and stuff.”

“It’s... nice,” Damian says confusedly. “Why did he do that?”

“Hell if I know. Most of the people who did these paintings were probably on some drug or another,” Janis says in reply. “Neat though.”

Janis leads them from area to area, explaining and listing facts about whatever Damian or Cady point to. It works well enough for all of them. They get to see all the famous works, Janis gets to see everything she wants, and Damian and Cady get explanations and extra facts from Janis.

“Wow,” Cady says when she spies the Vénus de Milo. She breaks away from them and wanders over to get a closer look. Janis follows her and leads Damian after them, since Cady is small and easy to lose.

“That’s the Vénus de Milo,” she hums in Cady’s ear. “She’s supposed to be one of the Greek goddesses.”

“Which one?” Damian asks.

"Nobody really knows,” Janis replies. “Most people think Aphrodite. Venus was her Roman counterpart, so that’s where the name came from.”

“Her dress is falling off,” Cady mumbles distractedly, making Damian and Janis laugh. “What happened to her arms?”

“Fell off,” Janis shrugs. “There’s a lot of theories about that too. They probably were just too heavy and broke away at some point. Some people think it was a shipwreck or something, I can’t remember specifically.”

“Hm. That’s interesting,” Cady says. “Oh, her foot is gone too.”

“Yeah, she’s lost a lot of stuff over the years. She had jewelry and stuff originally,” Janis replies. “Just lost to time one way or another.”

Cady leans back against her and turns her head to kiss at Janis’ jaw. “You’re so smart. I love you, art freak.”

Janis grins. “I love you too, math nerd.”

“Okay, time to move on! Chop chop,” Damian insists, wanting to get as far away from their sappiness as he can.

—————

“That was... really fun, Bluejay,” Cady yawns once they’re finally back in their hotel room, freshly showered and ready to sleep. “I love seeing you with art.”

“I’m glad you had fun,” Janis replies as her wife spoons her. “Go to sleep, Butterfly, we have to be up early tomorrow.”

“Why?” Cady yawns again.

“I’m not gonna tell you, or you’ll never sleep,” Janis says. “It’s nothing terribly exciting, but they open early. We should be there pretty soon after it does.”

“Oh. Mmkay. G’night, love.” Cady mumbles, seeming content with Janis’ surprises for once. Janis had toned it down slightly, they were going to Disneyland Paris tomorrow. She’d talked it over with Damian, and agreed that he got to pick what they do tomorrow.

“Goodnight, Princess,” Janis says, secretly giving a little hint.

——————-

She kisses Cady awake the next morning around eight. “Good morning, Butterfly.”

“Good morning,” Cady yawns. “Where are we going today?”

“I’ll tell you in a bit,” Janis replies. “I made sure we had cuddle time today.”

“Good,” Cady replies, pulling Janis down on top of her. “How did you sleep?”

“Good, actually,” Janis replies. “I think I’ve finally actually adjusted to the time shift. How did you sleep?”

“Good,” Cady says. “Nobody sat on me to wake me up today, I much prefer kisses.”

“Noted,” Janis chuckles. “For the record, so do I.” Cady gives a chuckle that says she already knows but has chosen to ignore that information.

“When do we get breakfast?” Cady asks after a long, peaceful moment.

“On the train,” Janis replies. “My cuddles not enough for you?”

Cady flicks her nose gently. “Yes, they are, but unfortunately I can’t live on cuddles alone. The train. That means somewhere pretty far away.”

Janis checks the time, it’s been about a half hour since they woke up. They should probably get ready now. She sits up, and rolls off of Cady so she isn’t thrown to the ground again.

“Dame and I decided we’re going to Disneyland today,” she says gently. As she expected, Cady flies out of bed with a delighted squeal and starts dancing around the room. Janis just watches her with a smile, until Cady leaps on her from above and kisses everywhere she can reach.

“Disneyland! Let’s go, come on, we have to get ready!” Cady calls, lugging Janis out of bed to shower and get dressed. She’s almost as excited as she was when she found out they were coming to France in the first place.

“Baby,” Janis says lovingly. “Breathe. You have an hour long train ride to get through first, we can’t have you leaping out the window when we’re going several hundred miles per hour.”

Cady comes back down to Earth a bit then. “Oh.”

“Come on, let’s get ready, Peanut,” Janis coaxes, turning the shower on.

-

Half an hour later, both ladies are showered and dressed in loose clothing and good shoes, before they head down to meet Damian. Cady leaps on him before he can even open the door all the way.

“We’re going to Disneyland!” She squeals when he yelps in surprise as a small redheaded rocket suddenly barrels into him.

“Good morning, Caddy,” he chuckles affectionately. Janis grabs her wife back, picking her up to carry her to the elevator.

“Come on, Peanut, let’s go,” she tuts lovingly as Cady clings to her with a delighted giggle. “Gonna have to get a leash for you.”

“Kinky,” Cady teases. “I’ll calm down.”

“No you won’t,” Janis retaliates. She doesn’t really want Cady to calm down, anyway. “I know you, wifey.”

“Fine, you’re right,” Cady agrees. “But I won’t run away. I need you guys to show me around anyway.”

“Happily,” Janis says as she finally sets her down.

—————-

Cady is already spinning around in awe when they’re finally outside the gates. Janis links their fingers together as she buys their tickets, and Damian grabs Cady’s other hand before Cady tugs them forward.

Janis buys their way into the park and squeezes Cady’s hand. “Where first, babe?”

“Oh, I don’t know! There’s so much,” Cady says happily. “Oh, can we get ears?”

“Sure,” Janis says. “Well, you can.”

“You don’t want ears?” Cady pouts. “They have a bunch.”

“Under no circumstances am I wearing Mickey ears,” Janis replies. “But you pick some, they’ll be cute on you.”

Ten minutes later, Janis is wearing ears. Cady has some on that look like Simba’s, Damian has a pair designed to look like Mulan’s costume, and Janis has been coaxed by her wife into a Maleficent themed pair. Cady takes a selfie of all of them with their ears, making kissy faces at the camera, and one with their normal smiles.

“Yay! Okay, I wanna see the castle,” Cady cheers as she puts her phone away.

“There’s a dragon too,” Janis says.

“A dragon?” Cady asks. “In the castle?”

“No, underneath,” Janis says. “This way, come on.”

Sure enough, the shortcut Janis takes leads them to a very large animatronic dragon deep in the belly of the castle.

“That’s so cool,” Cady says as she watches it move. “Look, you can see it breathe.”

“The wings move too,” Damian says, pointing to one. “And its feet.”

“Wow,” Cady says. “Can we go in the castle?”

“I think so,” Janis replies. “Line might be a bit long, but we can if you want.”

“It’s so pretty,” Cady sighs happily. “The waterfalls.”

Damian leads them inside and up to the second floor, where there’s a series of large and beautiful stained glass windows depicting the story of Sleeping Beauty. Cady leads them around to peer through each.

“Oh, it’s so beautiful up here,” Cady says. “But let’s go ride stuff, we can come back here later.”

“I wanna go on the Ratatouille ride,” Damian says quickly. Cady nods rapidly, and Janis is also intrigued, so Damian takes their hands and leads them that way. “It’s super cool, they’re not on a track. It’s all computers.”

Cady looks more than a little apprehensive at that. “And they don’t crash into each other?”

“No, they all have programmed routes, every car is different. Don’t worry,” Damian replies.

“Oh. That sounds fun,” Cady cheers. The lines are usually decorated with some sort of theme to match, and Cady looks around excitedly. Janis contents herself with watching her wife until they’re led onto the ride.

Janis has to admit that it is more fun than she had anticipated, it actually makes you feel like a little rat running around. But the best part is still Cady and Damian’s laughter throughout the whole thing.

“Where do you want to go, Jayjay?” Cady asks once they finish, still giggling slightly.

“Hyperspace Mountain,” Janis says immediately. “I don’t know if you guys would like it though, it goes pretty fast.”

“I’ll try it,” Cady says.

Damian says, “Hard pass,” at the same time. “You guys go, I’ll just look around.” He holds their ears and bags as they go to wait in line.

“Cads, are you sure you want to come? It’s a roller coaster, you didn’t like them last time,” Janis asks once they’re in line.

“That was almost ten years ago, love. Maybe I’ll like this one,” Cady says. “I’ll try anything once. And anything for you.”

Janis grins and leans in for a chaste kiss. “If you’re sure. I love you.”

“I love you more,” Cady retaliates.

“No, we’ve been through this!” Janis insists.

“And we’ve never reached a conclusion, so what’s your point?” Cady says with a chuckle. “This could continue until the end of time.”

Janis kind of hopes it does. They continue bickering until they’re fastened in. Cady goes quiet when she realizes where she is. She’s excited, but still nervous. She doesn’t have a great track record with roller coasters so far. Janis takes her hand and kisses her knuckles to help calm her down just before they shoot forward.

Cady’s hair is entirely poofed out by the time they get off, and she’s shaking slightly.

“Did you like it?” Janis asks as they head back to Damian.

“Uhhuh,” Cady says shakily.

“Are you lying?” Janis asks, knowing her wife.

“Uhhuh,” Cady says again. Janis laughs, but hugs her gently once they’re out of the way.

“You don’t have to come with me on anything else, it’s okay,” Janis chuckles as her wife clings to her. She seems better this time, she’s not shaking quite so hard and doesn’t look near tears. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” Cady replies. “Just... maybe shouldn’t go on anything for a little while. I’m a little overwhelmed.”

“That’s fine, baby,” Janis says. “I’m hungry anyway, let’s find something to eat.”

“Oh, yay!” Cady cheers, always excited to eat. “Oh, Damian has something.”

“Hey guys!” Damian says as they finally reach him. “I found crepes.” He hands each of them a Nutella crepe he had gotten off a cart. “Nice hair, Cads.”

“Thanks,” Cady says, knowing she resembles a lion. She grabs her Lion King ears back to complete the look, before she ties her hair back in a ponytail to make it more manageable. “Ooh, this is good!”

“Yeah, for Disney it’s not bad,” Janis agrees around a mouthful. “Where d’you want to go now?”

“There’s a little Alice in Wonderland maze thingy over that way, it looks cute,” Damian says as he finishes his own snack. “And would be a good way to recover from the coaster.”

“Yes, please, let’s go there,” Cady says, already setting off. Janis and Damian hurry after her towards the maze.

They decide to split up and see who makes it out first. Cady winds up winning, jumping up and down as her wife and friend come out after her. “I win!”

“Nice, Cads. Must be some Kenya left in you,” Damian congratulates, ruffling her hair. “Where now?”

“There’s a pirate thing over that way, I can’t remember if it’s Peter Pan or Pirates of the Caribbean,” Janis replies. “That’s pretty chill.”

“Oh, that sounds nice,” Cady says. Janis leads them over to it and hugs Cady tight as they wait in line.

“Are you having fun?” She asks quietly as Damian sings along to the music playing.

“Yeah, I really am,” Cady grins. “Are you?”

“Yeah,” Janis says back. “I am. I love you.”

“I love you too,” Cady replies.

-

By the time the sun is starting to go down, they’ve gone on everything they wanted to, eaten almost every food offered around the premises, and taken pictures with just about every character they could find.

They have enough time to stay and watch the fireworks before they have to catch the train back. Cady has exerted all of her energy, so Damian and Janis switch off carrying her piggyback around as they finish doing what they want to.

Janis has her as they watch the fireworks, bundled cozily in the matching Mickey Mouse hoodies they had bought when Cady got cold. Cady squishes their cheeks together as they both look up, their Mickey ears clacking together gently.

“I love you so much, Janis,” Cady says quietly as the last firework pops off in the sky. If Cady wasn’t so close Janis wouldn’t have heard. “More than words can say.”

“I love you too, Cady. More than any language can say,” Janis replies. Cady nuzzles into her neck and drifts off to sleep, so Janis just adjusts her grip and chats with Damian as they head out towards the gates.

—————

A couple days later, they head out to see the Palace of Versailles. They’d taken a day to recover from Disneyland, just staying in their hotel and spending quiet time together.

Cady has read up on the history of the palace, and is rattling off facts about each area they visit. Janis is very interested in the beautiful murals on some of the walls and the gorgeous statues scattered about. Damian is more interested in hearing about the royals who built and used to live in the palace. Cady tells them about everything they want to know.

“What if we had a garden like this at home, Jay?” Cady asks as they stroll around the sprawling grounds. Damian had wandered off and got stuck on a tour, so they’re waiting for him to be released.

“We would be very tired trying to maintain it,” Janis responds. “It’s so big, I’m tired just looking at it.”

“True,” Cady giggles. “But I think if we were rich enough to have something this big we’d be able to pay someone else to take care of it. Just think of how much hide and seek we could play here. I’d never run out of hiding spots.”

Janis laughs. “That’s why you want such a massive place? Just to play hide and seek?”

“Why not? What else are you supposed to do with it?” Cady asks. “Just walking around it must get boring after a while.”

“I don’t know that it would, it’s so beautiful,” Janis hums. “You could take a different path every day.”

“You could paint a different part every day, too,” Cady says. “And it must look different in every season, you could do four for each part!”

“You want four paintings for each bit of this place?” Janis chuckles.

“I always want your paintings,” Cady says quietly. “They’re part of you.”

Janis is almost stunned silent. “Thanks, baby. That’s why I love everything you make.”

“Even that shitty plate I tried to make you?” Cady giggles.

“It works! It’s a plate,” Janis insists. “I can still use it. The lumps are good for holding salsa and stuff.”

“And you say you’re not cute,” Cady responds. “I wonder how much this has changed since people lived here. Like, someone from two or three hundred years ago could have walked this same path.”

“I don’t think it’s changed much,” Janis says. “Maybe we walked it before. Past life, or something.”

“Could be,” Cady hums pensively. “You think we were together in a past life?”

“I don’t see why we couldn’t have been,” Janis says. “I definitely feel like I’ve known you a lot longer than I actually have.”

“I feel that way too, I just thought it was a cheesy ‘our souls are connected’ thing,” Cady giggles. “Oh, there’s Damian. Poor thing, he looks so confused.”

“I don’t think that tour he got stuck on was in English,” Janis laughs as they wave him over. “I told him he should keep studying French, but no.”

“How was it, Dame?” Cady asks as Damian finally makes his way to them.

“The bits I could understand were quite interesting,” Damian replies. “Lot of walking though, this place is big.”

“It’s massive! And everything is so detailed, I think I could walk around here every day for ten years and still miss something,” Cady says happily.

“Right? I almost plowed some people down because I kept staring at the ceilings,” Damian chuckles. “Anyway, have you ladies seen what you want to see? I’m hungry.”

“When are you not?” Janis jokes, earning her a whack from her wife. “Ow!”

“Be nice,” Cady scolds. “I’m ready to go, I’m hungry too.”

“I’m nice! This is just how we treat each other,” Janis insists. “You’ve known us for ten years, come on!”

“Yes, and I’ve been constantly exasperated with you two ever since,” Cady sighs lovingly. “Now come on.”

—————

They head to a chocolate shop on their second-to-last day in Paris, so Aaron can get the freshest sweets possible. Janis is slightly worried that they won’t be able to bring them on the plane, but she decides to cross that bridge once they get there.

“So what kinds of chocolate does your boy toy like, Dame?” Janis asks, looking at a small bag of truffles that she’s very interested in for herself.

“Anything, really, he loves candy,” Damian says. “Where did Caddy go?”

“I dunno, she said she wanted to see something,” Janis replies. “She went that way.”

“Hm. Okay,” Damian says suspiciously. “God, everything smells so good.”

“Fresh chocolate,” Janis responds. Familiar arms suddenly wrap around her waist from behind. “Hi, Peanut. What have you been up to?”

“Nothing,” Cady hums in a tone that says she’s definitely been up to something. “Did you pick something?”

“Damn, why is this so expensive?” Damian asks suddenly, holding a case of chocolates of varying flavors. “All of the stuff here is.”

“Because it’s handmade,” Janis says. “They make new stuff every day.”

“Jesus,” Damian sighs. “He’d like this, though.”

“Done,” Janis says as she takes it, working her way over to buy them with her wife still clinging to her. “Now, what did you really get up to, Butterfly?”

“I might have signed us up for an eclair making class,” Cady mumbles. “They said we get to eat the rejects, I couldn’t resist!”

Janis laughs. “That sounds fun, babe, it’s okay. When is it?”

“Now,” Cady says shyly as a man suddenly emerges from the back and greets them. They’re led to wash their hands and put on gloves and hairnets.

The chef gives the instructions in French, so Janis translates as quickly as she can. “Oh, shit.”

“What? We haven’t even done anything yet, what could’ve happened already?” Damian asks frantically.

“He says if ours are good enough they’ll sell them in the shop,” Janis explains. “Or at least use them as a display.”

“Ooh,” Cady says excitedly, paying even closer attention.

“Why is a little bread thing so complicated?” Janis asks in slight fear, as the chef adds flour to a milk mixture and cooks it out.

“But they’re so good,” Cady says, restraining herself from eating all the caramel ingredients and tasty chocolate within her reach. “It’s worth it!”

The chef instructs them through the process of making a sort of caramel custard while the eclairs bake. Damian has started taking notes on his phone.

They’re set loose then, to replicate what the chef has taught them from scratch. Cady starts what she remembers from making the pastry, adding milk and a few other things to a pan. “This already doesn’t look right.”

“Shh, no, it’s fine,” Janis says quickly. “Just keep going, it’ll be fine.” Miraculously, she’s half-right, by the time everything else has been added and combined it almost looks like the one done by a professional.

Damian helps Janis load the dough into the piping bag, Cady watching anxiously off to the side. Janis gets to pipe them out on the bakeware, trying to remember how the chef did it.

She butchers the first one. It turns out sort of lumpy and misshapen, but for her first try it’s not terrible. Unfortunately, the improvement for the others is rather minimal.

“What are you doing? The fuck is that?” Damian calls as she pipes one and twists the end the wrong way.

“My best! I’m doing my best,” Janis calls back. “Look, we can fix it, it’s fine!”

“It’s not fine, oh my god,” Damian says. Janis suddenly hits an air bubble, making one of the eclairs much shorter than it was supposed to be.

“And you’re not helping!” Janis says, piping a little more out. Cady is bent over double laughing at their interaction. “Get the egg wash ready, dork.”

Damian helps Cady get the wash ready, brushing it over the piped pastry and shaping them back to something approaching decent.

“There,” Cady says as she brushes tears of laughter from her eyes. “Good job, guys.”

Janis huffs as she rests the piping bag down and glares at Damian. “Thank you. I tried very hard.”

“I never said they were bad,” Damian defends as the chef helps them clean up to prepare to make the filling. He’s also laughing, apparently having understood most of the recent conversation. “I just criticized your every move.”

“And I appreciate that so much,” Janis says sarcastically. “You fixed them, they’ll be fine.”

Cady gets to make most of the filling, with the chef watching protectively nearby in case of disaster. For her first time making caramel, she does remarkably well. She yelps a little when it puffs up as they add the cream to make it a custard, but recovers quickly and keeps going.

“There, see? Much easier,” Cady says, looking meaningfully at her wife and friend. The caramel is only slightly burnt, but the chef tasted it and said she could get away with it. That was her goal all along.

The eclairs come out of the oven looking remarkably good, and Cady helps Janis prepare the piping bag for the filling. The chef watches them in amusement, and Cady suddenly realizes they’ve made a terrible error.

“Jay?” She asks as Janis fills the bag, blissfully unaware.

“What?” Janis asks.

“We’ve made a mistake,” Cady mumbles, trying to hold back laughter.

“What? What did we do wrong?” Janis asks sadly.

Cady giggles hysterically. “When is the tip supposed to go in?”

Janis’ eyes go wide, and Damian bursts out laughing.

“Shit. Um... how do... what do we do?” Janis asks.

“Take the filling back out so we can put it in?” Cady suggests. Janis takes the bag and scrapes the caramel custard back into the bowl frantically while Cady hunts for the piping tip. “There, problem solved.”

“How are we so bad at this?” Janis mumbles as Cady puts the tip in and holds it for Janis to refill.

“We’re American,” Damian answers. “And eclairs are, like, famously tough to make.”

Once the filling bag is properly constructed, Cady hands the bag to Damian so he can pipe the eclairs full.

“You’re doing it wrong,” Janis teases to get him back. “Look, you have to fill them more! What are you doing?”

“Okay, point proven,” Damian grumbles as he pipes in more on the other side. Cady covers them with the same custard once they’re all full, and then a piece of chocolate is rested on as decoration.

“Yay, we didn’t do that bad!” Cady cheers. “They don’t look that different from his.”

“Yeah, but how do they taste?” Janis asks. She grabs what is clearly the worst looking one and takes a bite, and her eyes go wide when it’s actually quite good. “Oh, shit. Guys, try it.” Cady takes a bite too, and she dances happily at the taste. Damian goes next, giving a surprised hum.

The chef tries one of his own, hiding his surprise well. He informs them that they’re not quite good enough to sell, but they look good enough that they can pick one to put in the window. They pick the best looking one, and get to take the rest home.

“Well that was certainly an experience,” Damian chuckles. “Nice pick, Cads.”

“Thanks! That was fun,” Cady says happily. “And we get eclairs!”

Janis chuckles at how cute her wife is. “Let’s go eat them all.”

—————

On their last full day in Paris, they finally get to go up the Eiffel tower. Damian and Janis are more than a little anxious, since it’s so high, but Cady promises to keep them both safe.

The sun went down a few hours ago, and the stars are out in full force. Cady leans up against the railing and looks out over the rooftops of Paris, thinking back on all the experiences she’s gotten to have over the last week and a half or so.

Janis comes up to hug her from behind as she spies Notre Dame, making her jump. They were warned about pickpockets, so they gave everything important to Janis to keep in her inner jacket pockets. Cady still gets startled.

“Sorry,” Janis says quietly. “Just me.”

Cady leans back against her and turns to smile up at her. “Just my favorite person in the world.”

Janis chuckles. “You’re pretty high on my list, too.”

“Good, nice to know,” Cady giggles in reply.

“Was this a good trip?” Janis asks, kissing her cheek and looking out. She can see the candy shop they got Aaron’s thank you present from the day before, and their hotel. It’s all lit up, and very beautiful.

“A great trip. I loved every minute,” Cady replies. “I don’t want to go home.”

“I don’t either,” Janis says. “We’ll come back soon.”

“We better. We can actually go places now that I’m not in school anymore,” Cady replies. “Thanks for bringing us here.”

“Of course. Dame, come here,” Janis says, reaching for him. He comes to join the cuddle, forming a group hug.

“I love you guys,” he says quietly. “Thanks for the trip, Janjan.”

Janis sniffs, crying slightly. “Both of you stop it, this is too mushy.”

“Aww, Jellybean,” Cady coos. “Come here.” She pulls Janis and Damian in tighter, both of them bending down slightly to cuddle into her shoulders. “I love both of you so much.”

“I said stop,” Janis whines. “God, I love you guys so much.”

“We are in the city of love, Jan, you can’t stop it,” Damian chuckles. “I don’t even want to think about what you two did in that room.”

“Damian Hubbard!” Cady scolds. “Behave.”

“Sorry,” Damian says sheepishly. “I’ll give you guys a moment.” He heads to the other side then, looking out over a different part of the city.

Janis pulls back from her wife and wipes her eyes gently, Cady cupping her face and running her thumbs over her cheeks.

“J’taime tellement,” Cady whispers, leaning up to press their lips together. Another thing to check off their bucket lists, making out on top of the Eiffel tower.

“J’taime aussi,” Janis replies between kisses. “Tellement.”

“We’ll come back someday,” Cady murmurs gently, ghosting the words against Janis’ lips. “We do have to go home.”

“Do you want to know your other surprise?” Janis asks. “Make going home a little easier?”

“Yeah,” Cady says excitedly. Janis grins.

“Remember how when you were trying to guess what I got you in the first place, you asked if we were getting a puppy? And I said no?” Janis asks. Cady nods. “I lied.”

“Really?” Cady squeals. “You’re serious?”

“I don’t kid around about puppies. I found a breeder who just had a litter of golden retrievers a while ago, once we get settled back home we’ll go choose one,” Janis replies, giggling as Cady kisses her passionately again.

“Oh, golden retriever puppies are so cute, yay,” Cady says, bouncing happily. “Elvira gets a sibling.”

“Oh, she’s gonna hate that,” Janis chuckles.

“She’s still young, she’ll learn to like them,” Cady says. “She’s only two.”

“Yeah, that’s, like, a lot of cat years,” Janis says. “She’s a moody teenager.”

“God, yeah,” Cady chuckles. “Sleeps all day too. Oh well, we’ll pick a puppy with a similar personality.”

“I think you’re right, though. They’ll get used to each other eventually,” Janis says.

“We’ll work on it,” Cady replies. “Good job, love, now I almost want to go home.”

“Good,” Janis laughs. “But for now, kiss me again.”

“Gladly,” Cady purrs, popping up on her tippy toes again.

————-

A week later, they’re back in New York and almost adjusted once again to the time change. Time for a puppy.

They’d gotten all the supplies they would need the day before and set up the living room, deciding to keep Elvira in the bedroom until they were ready to be introduced face to face.

Cady shakes with excitement almost the whole way, frantically fiddling with a few of the stim toys she’s recently added to her collection.

When they enter the shelter, they’re immediately swarmed by a flock of puppies, wagging their tails happily and sniffing their shoes. One hops up on its hind legs to sniff Cady better.

“Oh my god,” Cady squeals, in a higher pitch than Janis has ever heard from her. “Oh, you’re all so cute, how am I supposed to pick?”

Janis sits down and laughs as several clamber onto her lap, trying to kiss her face. Cady follows suit, shrieking in surprise as about seven suddenly swarm in and knock her onto her back. One makes it to her face first, sniffing curiously at her nose before settling in on her chest for a nap.

“Oh. Who’s this one?” Cady asks, waving the others away from her face and cradling the one resting.

“That’s Salt. You can change her name if you want,” the breeder replies. “She’s the smallest, and pretty lazy, but she’s very gentle.”

Janis comes over carrying three others in her arms, trying to keep them off her lap. She extends a hand for Salt to sniff and chuckles when she chomps gently on her fingers.

“What do you think, baby?” Janis asks, looking at her wife.

“I love her,” Cady says happily. “Look at that face! We have to go now or I’ll take all of them, get me out of here. I want this one.”

“Sounds good, Butterfly,” Janis laughs. “Come on, let’s go get everything sorted.”

“Okay,” Cady says, scooping up her puppy and following them. “Bye guys! Oh, god, all of you are so sweet.”

“Okay, Salt here is already spayed and microchipped, mostly housebroken, but she’s not trained in any other way. She’s also had all her vaccinations to date, and here’s a recommendation for a vet,” the breeder says. “We notify on our social media whenever one gets adopted, so if you’d ever like to meet up with any of her siblings you can get in touch with their families that way.”

“Aww, that’s great, you’ll get to see your brothers and sisters again,” Cady coos. “Now we get to take you home!”

Janis manages to wiggle the puppy into her new harness and clip the leash on, leading her wife and new addition out once the puppy has said her goodbyes.

“What should we name her, Cads?” Janis asks as the puppy sniffs at a tree.

“What was the name of that shop? From Marseille, where your parents met?” Cady asks.

“La Jonquille,” Janis replies.

“What does that mean? I forgot,” Cady says with a chuckle as Salt runs out of leash and falls down.

“The Daffodil,” Janis says.

“Aww! What about Daffodil? That’s cute,” Cady squeals. “And we could call her Daffy.”

“I like it,” Janis replies. “Come here, Daffy! Come here!” Daffodil comes running over and bumps into Cady’s legs. “Aww, she likes it too, she responded to it.”

“Yay,” Cady says, picking her up and laughing as Daffy licks her face happily. “Oh, goodness, we love you too.”

“Okay, you ready to go home?” Janis asks, scratching behind Daffodil’s little ears.

“Yeah,” Cady grins, taking the leash and holding hands with her wife with her other hand.

But I’m always home with you.

-

does one of the characters in this have my real name because I am just that lazy? yes. this work was a challenge for me, but so much fun to write. hope you enjoyed!

our status for requests is the same as it was in the previous work. I am still taking them, but be aware that it will be July until your work is released.

thanks for reading!

lots of love,

ezzy

[chrisevansgoodgirl]

you’re screwed up and brilliant and look like a million dollar man

summary: murder gloves.

warnings: S M U T. sex everywhere. it’s violent sometimes. what’s a safe word? lol ransom wouldn’t know. (seriously, reader tells him to stop a few times and he doesn’t, so pls do not read if that is upsetting to you) and they’re annoying, legit can’t talk without fighting. and that daddy kink because y’all know me. a lot of choking. very vanilla bondage. spanking. fluffy feelings about sweaters.

word count: a bit over 8,000

pairing: ransom drysdale x reader

a/n: lol and nearly THREE FUCKING MONTHS LATER 🙄🙄🙄🙄 truly, i am sorry. i hope that you picture a raccoon with creepy evil little hands when you think of me bc i am trash. and i have creepy evil little hands. you guys know how excited i got when i thought of this title, right?

It was your anniversary even though it hardly felt like one at all.

Six years today. Somehow, you had put up with all the shit. His horrid behavior at times. The family drama. The extravagant events Harlan planned that your high maintenance boyfriend never let you miss. Whenever you tried it, he either pouted or just fucked you until you wouldn’t dream of ever saying the word ‘no’ to him. At least not for a few days.

Six years.

Yet, you were sure he was still nowhere near proposing. That was a battle for the next anniversary, you had decided. This anniversary required much more pressing topics to be discussed.

You heard Ransom pull up in the driveway and come inside, but you kept your place at the counter. When he found you in the kitchen, you were in a thin robe, making him an Old Fashioned while your coffee brewed.

You glanced at him over your shoulder as he sat at the dining table. His eyes lingered on you for a moment but then he turned down to his phone, so you took your chance to stare. After all these years, you would think that the sight of him in a sweater wouldn’t matter to you, but it still did.

You’d met him in a sweater, several December’s ago at a ski lodge where you had bonded over unfathomable resentment toward your respective families and an inability to ski—something he still wouldn’t admit. I can ski, I just wanted to fuck you. You were practically begging me. Was I supposed to say no? That wasn’t exactly how it happened but when Ransom pouted, that often meant no sex, so you let him lie. Regardless, he was beautiful then and you swore he got more beautiful by the day.

He lifted both hands onto the tabletop in front of him, phone set against his palm, showing off those stupid leather gloves that were starting to make you question your sanity. You thought about those gloves too much and in the most depraved ways.

“Did you get the house?” you asked, a distraction for yourself. No sex, not until he gave you an answer. Hell, he was gone most of the day with Marta, so he damn well better have some success to report.

He narrowed his eyes, lifting his gaze from his phone screen. “Why are you so dressed?”

Normally, he liked you walking around the house in nothing. A bodysuit, maybe. A bra, panties, and thigh-high socks. He liked you as naked as you could get. You liked it as well, it reminded him that even though, most of the time, he was in control, there were times when it was you. You who had final say, you who would withhold sex as some deranged power play. Sure, you needed Ransom like you needed oxygen or money, but he needed you just as much.

The robes were for occasional visitors. He knew that, he was just trying to prolong this conversation. He was trying to bait you, actually. If you were feeling…playful, you would have lied or refused to tell him. Then, long story short, you wouldn’t have been able to walk or sit right for a week. It wasn’t that he even needed such an elaborate reason to start this game, this time he was just trying to distract you.

“Joni stopped by.”

He gave you a flat look. Nothing confused him more than you sincerely getting along with Joni.

“She brought some crystals for us.”

“Rocks,” he corrected. “And they’re damn ugly and they’re not staying in my house.”

“Tiger’s eye for mental clarity,” you explained, voice level. It was your house too, and if he wanted to play this game, well, you had no problem throwing a chair through the window. Again. “Amethyst, for protection and stress—and intuition! It’s great for the third eye chakra—”

“Don’t start all that bullshit with me—”

“You’re just mad that I’m psychic—”

“No, you are not,” he snapped.

“Scared I’m going to find out about whoever else you’re fucking?” Okay, he wasn’t sleeping with anyone else. If you truly thought that, you would have been so far out the door the second you had a suspicion. Ransom was good. Even though he liked to pretend he wasn’t.

He glared. “It’s a god damn scam—”

“Your family specializes in those.”

“She’s not family.”

“Meg is,” you pointed out. It was left unstated but blatantly clear that that did, in fact, mean that Joni was family also.

“Joni thinks you have money, she’s trying to play you.”

“They don’t need to play me, Ransom. I like Meg, she’s nice…and she’s finishing her degree. I’ll make sure of that, with or without your help. And I like Joni, you know, she was the first one who was nice to me. Other than Walt, I guess—”

“Yeah, he was nice because he wants to fuck you.”

“You think everyone wants to fuck me.”

“Joni does, too.”

“Oh yeah, your whole family?”

“My grandfather included.”

You rolled your eyes. “Can you not be so…you, right now? Please, he’s fucking dead, Ransom.”

“He was a fucking perverted bastard. He always stared at you, tried to get you alone as much as possible. And don’t even get me started on that time he had you on his lap—”

“It wasn’t like that,” you argued.

He arched an eyebrow.

So, you were sitting on Harlan’s “lap”. It was Christmas, Harlan had dressed up as Santa. Ransom liked to pretend that Meg and Marta weren’t in the picture with you. Okay, maybe it was that you were trying to make him mad. You remembered that to be around the time you discovered that angry sex with Ransom was something else, something you truly weren’t sure how you had lived without.

You walked his drink to him and you watched as he downed the entire glass.

“Make me another. Please.”

You returned to the counter to oblige. You weren’t much of a cook, neither was Ransom, but he had the strongest desire to see you acting domestic for him. Sometimes, that just meant you making him drinks or bringing him a beer. You didn’t mind, so long as he watched you the entire time.

You once again set the glass in front of him. “So, your mother wants to fuck me?”

He eyed you, lifted the glass to his lips, took a small drink, set it down, then he nodded once. Instead of speaking, he went back to texting on his phone.

“Donna?”

“Not family, but yes.”

“Jacob?”

He scoffed. “Yes, he would fuck you. Also, possibly tie you up and dismember you after that—”

“Nana?”

Again, his eyes narrowed at you. He knew you were up to something now. He lifted one of his hands, smirking when he saw how intently your eyes were following it. He pulled at the tie of your robe; it was such slinky material that it slipped off your shoulders just after it was loose enough.

Your bodysuit was lace because Ransom loved you in lace. It was a tiny white scrap with thin straps and cups that your breasts spilled out of when you bent over. You were never one for modesty, but there was always something that made you want to cover up whenever Ransom was looking at you—even though his eyes were always full of lust and appreciation.

He let his hand return to the table and he looked at his phone.

Seriously? That was it? You shoved his phone away, it clattered to the table a few inches over, and you sat down on top of him. Your arms around his neck, your knees pressed to his hips, hovering over his soon-to-be hard cock. “And what about your dad?”

“Excuse me?” he demanded.

“Does he wanna fuck me? Because maybe I should ask him to get me that house and maybe fucking him would be all the motivation he needs, motivation you clearly are not feeling—”

You heard his arm brush across the table and then his glasses were shattering to the floor. Before you could scold him, his hand tangled tightly in your hair and he jerked you down flat to the table. He abruptly stood, leaning over you, his face mere inches away from yours.

You should have been scared; you knew that. He was so strong and he rarely ever stopped to think, he was fast actions and apologies later. But this was Ransom and you couldn’t be scared of Ransom.

“Wanna try that again?” he challenged. “I’m not sure I heard you correctly.”

“I would love to sit on his face,” you stated. “And I would love to feel his m—”

He gripped your jaw with his free hand and you utterly melted. You couldn’t explain coherently how much you needed that cold leather against your skin. Despite what you knew he had done with those gloves. Hell, maybe that was why you liked them so much. All of his scheming and malice, the killing. But then he would come home to you and he was so soft and so sweet, until he wasn’t, until he was fucking you, spanking you, choking you.

“You. Little. Brat. I got the fucking house for you—”

“You did?” you blurted out.

You suddenly realized, of course. That was why he hadn’t answered you. He knew you were getting impatient and he knew you would act out. Now, he would get to punish you. You would have been mad but the Thrombey house was the most beautiful house you had ever laid eyes on. The idea of building an actual life with Ransom there, in a house that he loved even though he wouldn’t admit it to his parents, only made you happy.

“I did,” he promised. “And now, you have to earn it.”

“Excuse me?”

“Brats don’t get houses.”

“You’re out of your fucking mind,” you accused. “I’m not earning anything. Every day I fucking put up with you, I earn that fucking house.”

“You just made a comment about wanting to fuck my dad—”

“No, I said I wanted your dad to eat me out. There’s a difference.”

He pressed his fingers into your jaw harder and yanked a little on your hair. “Say you’re sorry, baby doll.”

“Fuck. You.”

He narrowed his eyes, hand snapping from your face down to the clasp of your bodysuit that lay between your legs. He yanked it open, settling his hips against your knees to hold you open for him.

He never moved his eyes from yours and you, if only to meet his challenge, did the same. “I swear, you better not be wet.”

He was in a fucking sweater, what did he expect? You figured voicing that question would do nothing for you, probably only make him even more conceited. No, silence could damn you if that meant Ransom was knocked down a little.

“Or you’ll have to be my father’s latest mistress because I will fucking throw you out.”

“Well, maybe he’s better than you,” you pointed out.

Instead of a verbal response, his leather-clad fingers smacked your cunt.

Pleasure was right on the tail of pain, so close that you weren’t sure what you were feeling. Yes, it hurt, but wow—it fucking hurt. Half of you wanted to retract from the pain but as it settled, you immediately wanted more. If you weren’t wet before… Your body was vibrating with your undeniable need for him, but still, fuck him. He’d been an ass since he walked in and you didn’t feel like just giving in.

“Ow! What the fuck is wrong with you?” you demanded, only because he was smirking at you and staring with knowing eyes. “Get the fuck off of me.”

He snorted at what you both knew was a sad attempt on your part.

You began to struggle against him, attempting to push him back with your knees. “Ransom, let me go.”

He forced you into a sitting position with the hand still in your hair and let go just to grab your wrists. His other hand grabbed quickly at the scarf around his neck.

“Don’t you fucking dare!” you warned.

He shoved you back down, forcing your arms above your head.

“Ransom, I swear—”

He cut you off with a rough kiss as he wound his scarf around you in some complex way that he probably wouldn’t even be able to get you out of when this was all over.

You turned your head away, and he moved his mouth to your neck. “If you do not untie me, I am going to leave and never come back!”

He bit you hard enough to leave a mark before pulling back to set himself onto his forearms. “And live where? The street? Or you wanna go crawling back to your fucked-up parents?”

“Tell them I finally came to my senses; they’d take me back.” Long story short, your parents fucking hated Ransom. They thought he would never do anything for you or give you anything.

It didn’t help that you sort of cut back on work once you’d met Ransom. He was possessive, he just didn’t want you flying all over the world if you couldn’t take him with you. And you couldn’t because his family was beyond demanding and Ransom still had to show up now and then at whatever theatric event Harlan could think up. And as a model…taking pictures with men sometimes, or other women, wearing very little? Well, Ransom would never ask you to quit but he was always so insecure afterward. You still had your campaigns, a few projects you did with friends, but you were hardly a model anymore.

But well, your parents were obviously fucking wrong. He got you the house. The first time he had taken you there was to meet his grandfather—which was huge because it was the first time Ransom was letting you get that close to him. He hadn’t anticipated Joni and Meg being there but you hadn’t complained. He had, non-stop. Still, it was something…special. He’d shown you his old room and fucked you. Took you out to the woods and fucked you against every awful statue out there. Then took you to his parents’ room and, of course, fucked you there.

They were meant to show the next week, you’d left before that. Much to his pleasure, his mother left him a screaming voicemail or two or seven once she’d realized what had been done on those silk sheets.

You’d fallen in love with the house and you couldn’t bear the thought of losing it to an outsider. At the will reading, when it was announced that it belonged to Marta, you nearly fainted. Ransom had been so damn calm though, up until he was laughing like the god damn psychopath that you’d always suspected he was.

That was five days ago and things between the two of you had been…unconventional. When he had shown up that night—after ditching you, no less, to do whatever he was doing with Marta—you immediately started fighting. You had to get a fucking Uber! And he refused to apologize because, according to him, you were “having an attitude”. Things were thrown, insults were traded, and it was the longest night of your whole relationship.

It was only two days ago that you admitted to the root of your hostility. The house. He couldn’t lose the house. It wasn’t like you thought you were going to be living in it any time soon, but when he did finally propose, maybe things would work out that way. The following morning, he apologized with a diamond necklace and the promise that he would get the house back from Marta.

“Or you could just apologize,” he pointed out.

See, he never did, and in all your time with him, you decided you never would either. It was a good relationship. The sex was amazing, you guys never lied, never cheated, but there were a few communication barriers that neither one of you wanted to mend. Who really needed the word ‘sorry’?

“Seriously, Ransom, fuck you.”

He sighed, but that did little to hide how thrilled he was that you wanted to fight today. “I try to be nice to you, you know. But you don’t want nice, do you?” He jerked you up higher on the table by your arms and crawled his way over you. His forearms were on either side of your head and his leg was coming up to settle between yours.

The table had been freezing, but with him over you, and his heavy coat caging you in, you were just hot. Too hot. The snow-covered back yard seemed the better option at that moment. Anything to get away from him.

“Ransom,” you sighed. “Enough, stop—”

He pressed his knee against you and you shuddered. It hadn’t been long at all, so why you were so desperate was beyond you. Since Harlan, Ransom truly had a new outlook on life. He was impulsive and selfish before, but after the death of his beloved grandfather, there was nothing that could stand in the way of what he wanted. And what he often wanted was you, not that you were complaining.

“Get yourself off, baby.”

You glared up at him. “Excuse me?”

“You heard me.”

Yes, you heard, but what the fuck?! You didn’t get yourself off. He was controlling enough to need to dictate every single one of your god damn orgasms and if it wasn’t because of his mouth, his fingers, or his cock, it wasn’t happening. “You’re not serious.”

“I’m not sure if I’m going to let you finish at all,” he explained. “I suggest you do it yourself.”

You theorized that if you complied now, then maybe he would forget he was so angry and just fuck you. That had happened a few times before, he did always tend to pout when he remembered, though.

Despite your pride and the burning you felt on the tip of your tongue because you sincerely wanted to yell at him, you rolled your hips. It was tentative almost, which made him scoff. The material of his pants was too soft and with no assistance from him and your awkward angle… You figured he was enjoying making you work for this so much.

After what you said about Richard? There was no way you were going to be able to convince him to help you. You supposed he didn’t need to. Hell, you didn’t even need to finish. He just had to think you did. You turned down to watch, moved your hips faster, started making just a little more noise—

“You’re faking.”

You stopped altogether with a huff. “I am not!”

“You are. You wanna know how I know? Because for the past few years, every orgasm in your life has been because of me. You don’t know how to get off without me.”

“You are such an ass.”

“You don’t just want to ask for some help?” He looked down, one hand lowering slowly. “You know I can be very helpful when I need to be.”

You watched, gasping just when he pulled his hand away. “Ransom.”

“Let me just take the gloves off—”

You whined an incoherent protest. You knew that he knew.

He pretended to be confused, eyebrows pulled together. “You want me to keep them on?”

You frowned at him.

“Why?”

“Fuck off, Ransom.” You didn’t know why! Your only theory was that you were just as messed up as him and that you needed to make an appointment with a mental healthcare professional!

He smiled widely, and you hated how that made your heart skip a little. He always smirked, rarely ever smiled, so when he did, you were screwed. “You want to hear about it again? About how I murdered my grandfather?”

You snorted. “Oh, is that what happened? I thought Marta murdered Harlan—”

“She didn’t.”

“She’s the one who gave him the medicine,” you pointed out. “You didn’t have to do anything except switch a vial.”

He narrowed his eyes at you. “You’re trying to provoke me.”

“Are you going to kill me, too? Oh, correction, are you going to get the help to kill me, too?”

“I might.”

“God, you are disgusting.”

He finally released your wrists to grab your jaw again. “Keep your arms up, I won’t tell you a second time.”

You were already moving them down, stopping right when you heard his threat. With a soft sight, you settled back against the table.

“Good girl.”

You wanted to hit him.

His thumb and forefinger pressed hard against your cheeks until you opened your mouth. He took that as his chance to slide two fingers inside your mouth until you gagged. You closed your mouth anyway, refusing not to meet one of his challenges.

They tasted even worse than you had imagined but you weren’t going to stop. You started to grind against his thigh again. It was better now, like maybe this was going to be enough to get you off.

He set his forehead to your temple, lips brushing against your ear as he spoke. “You don’t want to hear what happened after we left the party, after I fucked you in the car so good you couldn’t stand?”

Oh, that night. Where to begin with that night. It was Harlan’s birthday party, you’d been to all the ones before that and they’d gone off without…okay, well, there were definitely hitches, but nothing you hadn’t come to expect. Nothing that lasted too long. Yes, this family was all kinds of fucked up, but they never stayed away from one another for too long.

You had assumed Ransom’s argument with Harlan was going to be just another one of those cases. You’d been talking to Walt and Linda, the latter trying to ignore her husband’s attempts at pulling her into an argument he was having with Joni. Walt was talking about the company again; it didn’t bore you or Linda like it did everyone else.

Ransom’s voice carrying out from Harlan’s office startled everyone silent. He stormed out just to grab you and drag you outside, all while his family watched from windows at the front of the house. You told him to stop, which he didn’t. You told him your heels were a hazard, which he ignored.

When he started driving, you were honestly scared. Ransom was hardly a cautious driver generally, so when he was angry? And god, he was angry. You were sure you had never seen someone else get to him the way that Harlan had.

And he was ignoring you. He wouldn’t tell you what they fought about, but he always told you. It was, very simply, too much, and you were not going to put up with it. It was dark, cold, and Ransom had been drinking. You directed him to stop the car, and as firm as you hoped you were being, you were stunned when he listened.

The way he looked at you was so unlike any way he had ever done it before. You were more than just confused and you were a little worried, there was realization in his eyes. You could see that his mind was moving and you had known him long enough to know that that never meant anything good.

He demanded that you get out of the car and you did, even though part of you was worried he was going to leave you there. He followed, coming around to lead you into the of the car. He wrapped one hand around your throat and pinned you against the car door with his body, his chest to your back. His free hand was working his clothing out of the way, then fumbling to open the door.

He wordlessly shoved you against the seat, shoving your dress out of the way. Before you could say a word, he was inside you, his body covering yours. His hold around your throat was tight, and you knew that meant that he didn’t want to talk. That didn’t shut him up, however.

He just kept saying he was going to take care of you, and he didn’t loosen his hand until he asked you if you wanted him to take care of you. You said you did. He asked if he had taken care of you up to that point. You said that he had. He asked you if you trusted him. You said you did.

He left you in the backseat, covered in his cum and reddening marks on your neck, hips, and breasts, wrapped in his coat. He turned the car off and you echoed with just about 100 questions, none of which he directly answered. He said you couldn’t come with him because well, you honestly couldn’t walk.

The following morning, you woke up in bed while Ransom was making breakfast. Well, okay, you hadn’t actually seen him make anything, but since you didn’t find any restaurant containers, you couldn’t throw that accusation at him. He brought you pancakes to eat in bed and you guys had an amazing morning together.

By noon, the family was calling both of you with news of Harlan’s death.

He pressed his free hand over your face, covering your nose, and shoved his fingers deeper down your throat. You were choking and that didn’t frighten you like it should have. Some of the best orgasms you’d gotten from Ransom were when you were choking on his fingers or his cock.

You didn’t stop rocking your hips until you were finishing and you never once looked away from him. He stared into your eyes the entire time because it was undeniable at this point, Ransom had a kink for murder, and this was as close as he was going to get to it with you—some minor breath play.

He pulled away from you completely, stepping back onto the floor. He glanced down with a self-satisfied smirk, admiring the mess you had made on his pant leg. His amusement only grew as he watched you try to catch your breath.

You were still coming down when you felt Ransom leave the space between your legs. Glancing around the room, you found him at the counter. His back to you, you heard him pour some bourbon in a glass. You weren’t much of a bourbon person but whenever you tasted it on Ransom’s tongue, you never minded it too much.

When he returned to you, it was with a knife from the block on the counter. A large knife, you wondered what he would do if you made a comment about him compensating for something. “What the fuck are you doing?”

He smirked. “You scared?”

You snorted. “No.”

Arching an eyebrow, he pressed the blade down just barely against your thigh, dragging it upward toward your soaking center.

You had to bite your lip as he touched you there, just a tease because he didn’t truly want to cut you. The cool surface made goosebumps rise on your legs and your heart began to pound with excitement. You often wondered if you would be this fucked up if you had never found Ransom.

He lifted it to your chest, eyes bright as they followed the knife. He pressed down just slightly harder and led the knife to your shoulder. Your heart dropped the second you realized what he was doing.

“Ransom—”

“Shut up.”

“This is a piece from Megan Fox’s collaboration with Fredrick’s—” You felt the snap of your bodysuit’s strap and your jaw dropped.

He smirked down at you, proceeding to the next side to do the same.

“You fucking psycho!” you reprimanded. You thought dating a man with too much money and a narcissistic concern for his appearance would have given him at least some respect for clothing. “What the hell is wrong with you?”

“Wrong with me? You’re the one so wet over a god damn knife.”

“You can’t just destroy my clothes!”

“Well,” he shrugged, “just did. The fuck are you going to do about it? And consider your answer carefully, you know, if you want that house so badly.”

“It’s already my house,” you declared. “You got it for me. Stop pretending—”

“Pretending what? That I couldn’t find someone to replace you in a second? I bet Marta would be up for it.”

You shut up immediately, just staring at him. You knew Ransom liked it when your anger was quick. And truly, the last thing you wanted was to give him anything he wanted. You weren’t trying to be jealous in any way, but you’d always wondered how he felt about Marta.

He seemed to like talking to her—albeit, he also liked talking to Meg…just to get a rise. But he also liked getting a rise out of you, clearly. You just wanted to know. And he wouldn’t answer you, any time you asked him how he felt about someone else, he just fucked you.

“Now, don’t pout—”

“Fuck you—”

“Don’t be such a baby—it was a joke.”

“I don’t care,” you proclaimed. “You know, you can fuck her if you want.”

“Oh?”

You nodded, humming. “Please do. Then I’ll follow up with your dad.”

He snorted. “That’s getting weak.”

“You think he wants me to call him daddy?”

He took your neck in his hand. “If you say that again, I’ll fucking…”

“What?” you demanded. “What the fuck are you going to do, Ransom?”

Suddenly, he was kissing you. You’d blinked, then he was over you, hand tearing down your bodysuit as he held you by the throat. He stood to toss the bodysuit out of his way, eyes tracing your body.

He didn’t seem to care that you were completely out of breath by the time he’d pulled away, you didn’t either. This was something you both had in common. In moments like these, nothing mattered. You both did and said whatever you wanted, but by the time he was inside you, it was all forgotten.

“I’m moving out,” you announced.

He snorted. “You’re not.”

“Yes, I am. I’m going back home; I can’t stand another day with you.”

“You ever try to leave me and I will drag you back. Every fucking time, Y/N.”

You scoffed weakly. “Learn to hear the word no. You’ll need to. Now that you’re poor, especially.”

“You think that’s what this is?” He still wasn’t looking at your face, just your naked body as if he’d never seen it before. “You think it’s because I’ve never been told no?”

“What else would it be?”

He snorted. “Try to be less transparent. Is this your way of asking what we are?”

You knew what you were. To an extent. It was just that sometimes, Ransom wasn’t the most traditional, and you were okay with that. But well, it had been 6 years. You were waiting on the future to start, the engagement, the ring, changing your last name, possibly starting a family. But well, Ransom hadn’t even told you he loved you. You knew he did, love wasn’t just words, and he definitely showed you, but it would be nice to hear. Still, that was not what you had been asking… okay, maybe it kind of was what you were asking.

“No, I couldn’t care less. I won’t have to stay with you much longer anyway… I would never date anyone poor.”

“Baby, call me poor one more time and your ass is going to be so sore.”

He was in such an odd mood. You didn’t know exactly what he wanted. It had sounded like he’d wanted to fight, then he started getting…well, sappy for him. Now, he was threatening to spank you for stating fact?

“Look at that,” he taunted, smirking at your silence. “You can be such a good girl when you try.”

You rolled your eyes.

“I should give you incentive to shut your mouth more.”

“Excuse—”

He shushed you as his free hand pressed to your pussy.

You quieted only because you forced your mouth shut. You hadn’t been sure how the leather gloves were going to feel, if you should like them… But well, you did. And maybe you didn’t want him to know that.

But he did, that much you could tell from the arrogant look in his eye. You closed your eyes, letting your head roll back against the table. Whatever, you might as well get an orgasm for all this trouble he’d given you.

He traced small, gentle circles around your clit and you couldn’t even remember what you’d been arguing about. You knew he was watching you; you knew you shouldn’t be giving in so easy. That was why he was a dick; he knew you would let him be because he knew how to fuck you well. Two fingers easily slipped inside you—at least you thought it was two, you couldn’t tell.

You were caught off guard. It had been years since you’d felt something inside you other than Ransom*.

Was it supposed to feel good? What you liked was that these gloves were not supposed to be inside you, yet there they were. Ransom didn’t seem to care that they were close to a thousand dollars. You remembered glaring at him when he showed them to you, sent to him by one of his few friends, a designer (🙄) You had lectured him. They were real leather! You did not believe in killing animals for fashion. It was your one rule. You’d never participated in a campaign or contract if there was an animal harmed in the making.

But now, here you were, rolling your hips, fucking yourself on his fingers as he wore those sickening gloves. It was a strange sensation, maybe not good, but not bad. He started to crook his fingers against that spot that he could now locate in record time, and so it didn’t matter what it felt like anyway.

He leaned over you, grabbing one of your arms to pull you into a sitting position. “Watch, baby girl. Watch your pussy take my fingers.”

You turned down and at an agonizing speed, his fingers disappeared inside you. He crooked them twice before pulling them out almost completely. The gloves were embarrassingly wet and you could feel your cheeks heating because of it.

“Can you take another?” he inquired.

You weren’t capable of forming thoughts. Thankfully, he didn’t seem to want an answer. He pulled his fingers back, pushing three back in.

Your head dropped back and you closed your eyes. “Fuck, Ransom, please—”

“Keep watching, baby—I’m only going to tell you once.”

You hurriedly turned back; struggling to keep your eyes open and your hips still. Watching made you anxious because you knew exactly when you were going to feel what and you were simply not patient enough for your tease of a boyfriend.

“You hear how wet you are? Your pussy is so desperate…I bet it could take all four of my fingers. What do you think?” He took your jaw, turning your gaze up to him. “Hmm?”

You began to eagerly nod. “Yes.”

He pulled his arm back and let his pinky join as he moved it forward—once more, you felt yourself blushing at how easily they all slipped inside. It was a delicious stretch that was already driving you crazy. He rarely ever got to four fingers, by the time he was three in, that usually meant he was ready to fuck you. He always tried though, mindful of his size and how difficult it was to take him sometimes.

You sighed his name and whimpered a plea, you did not know what for, but he did. His free hand wrapped around your neck and he leaned in to kiss you, the fingers inside you still curling skillfully. His lips were soft against yours, a notable contrast to everything else he was doing.

“What is it about these gloves that get you so wet? he pressed. “Huh? Let me tell you, my love, about all the bad things I’ve done in them.” He seemed completely detached as he recounted all those events that you had missed because he’d wanted you to miss them, you wondered if he’d decided to that just so he could bring it up while he was fucking you.

Everything was calm and slow. Then he said Fran’s name and his hold on your neck tightened, and he started fucking you with his fingers, relentless in pressure and pace. His stare was locked on yours and you noticed how he brightened when tears finally filled your eyes. You would start turning a terrible red soon, you knew because he’d choked you enough times in the mirror. He always liked it so much so you never complained.

You had run out of air several long seconds ago and that was why your finish was coming so harshly. You just hoped he couldn’t tell because he would undoubtedly make you wait.

“I liked killing her,” he told you. “I would do it again. She was standing in the way—our way of the future I want to give to you. I’d fucking kill anyone for you, baby, you know that?”

“Yes,” you coughed. You didn’t think he killed Fran for you. Maybe, maybe on some low level, but it was ultimately for him. You didn’t mind that, though.

He smirked. “Say my name.”

He loved it when you were choking but still so desperate for him that you wasted what little oxygen you did have on saying his name, letting him know that he was pleasing you. You obliged and his hand instantly fell away from your neck. You took a deep breath in, coughing as you tried to blink away your tears.

He grabbed your hands and put them over his pants. “You feel how hard you’re making me, baby?”

Your pussy clenched around his fingers in anticipation, you couldn’t wait for him to be inside you. You hurriedly searched for the button on his pants until he shoved your hands away.

“No, not yet.” He grabbed your neck again and then crouched down, immediately burying his lips in your pussy.

A strangled yell came from your parted mouth, pure nonsense. You grabbed his forearm, a pathetic attempt to keep yourself sitting up, not that he would have let you fall if he didn’t want you to.

He tilted his head back to look up at you as his fingers kept working you. “Keep saying my name, baby.”

You did so three times before he finally placed his mouth back on you. You were shaking as he flicked his tongue over your clit repeatedly. Your end had built up to this impossibly high place, you were sure it was because your last orgasm was so unsatisfying.

Regardless, he’d barely been on his knees long at all when you knew you would come soon. And fuck, you needed to come. “Ransom—I—I’m—”

“You’re close?” he spoke against your hot, wet flesh, humming as he started sucking your clit gently. “Hm, baby?”

“Yes!” you sobbed.

And you couldn’t so much as blink before he was standing, pulling you off the table by your hips. You came crashing down hard, collapsing onto the table as you realized what was happening. You had been confused for only a second, but then, this was Ransom—why would you expect anything else?

That fucking piece of shit.

You were leaned over the edge of the table, legs shaking so much that he had to hold you up. Your bound arms were in front of you, unable to offer you any assistance. You wanted to push him away or kick him but you worried about your physical safety if you tried. The only thing that could make this situation worse was falling on your ass in front of Ransom.

The dick probably wouldn’t help you up.

You rested your forehead against the table, that was when you realized you were crying. Your cheeks were hot and lined with trails of tears. “I fucking hate you.”

His hand came down on your exposed ass with no warning at all.

You yelped, attempting to pull away from him.

He held you right where he wanted you with one hand closed around your hip bone.

“You’ve been acting like a brat this whole time, what the fuck did you expect?”

“Absolutely nothing from you!” you hissed. “You can’t fucking do anything right!”

And that rewarded you another slap on the opposite side of your ass.

You grit your teeth until your skin stopped stinging. “If you hit me again, I’m going to kill you!”

But hell, even you knew that was only going to get you another one. “You’re going to apologize.”

“For what?!”

“Everything—your attitude, talking about my father, and hanging out with Joni—”

“Oh, fuck you, Ransom! You’re a fucking psychopath with serious possession issues. I’m not a god damn object—”

His hand cracked across your ass, maybe a little more forceful than he intended but he hadn’t expected you to put up so much fight today.

Your mouth was clamped shut and more tears had gathered in your eyes. You weren’t sure what you were crying about anymore, sheer frustration or because he was hitting you so hard.

“Say you’re sorry.”

“No!” Was he out of his mind? He had never made you apologize like this. He let you suck him off or he just tied you up and you were “sweet” enough that he just forgave you. He had never tried to force you to say those words.

“Do it, now—”

“You’re out of your fucking mind,” you decided.

“I will give you one more chance,” he informed. “Then I’m done talking.”

“That sounds like the best idea you’ve had all day.”

He smacked you again. And again, you were finally starting to realize that the leather hurt more than his bare hand. Again, and your legs buckled. He quickly scooped you up, setting you atop the table.

“Ransom,” you pleaded.

Instead of responding verbally, he spanked you again. You only took three more before you blurted out those dreaded words. He paused but you knew he wasn’t going to give you more opportunities to make it right, you would have to do that on your own.

“I’m sorry for my attitude.”

He hummed and you were stupid enough to think he was going to let the rest go. Not a blink of an eye later, he smacked you again.

“And I’m sorry for what I said about your dad!”

Yet again, he struck you without a word.

“Ransom, please, I’m sorry! I’m really sorry—”

“Sorry…what?”

“What?” you breathed back. He didn’t say ‘for what’ because that much he knew; you’d said that much. Then what the fuck did he mean?

He tsked and you knew what was coming.

You flinched before he even touched you. “S-sir? I’m sorry, sir!” He’d tried to start that but it was awkward at best. Sir did nothing for either one of you. You were running out of logic though and seemed the best bet.

He snorted. “No, baby. Not ‘sir’.”

“Daddy!” you realized, nearly crying tears of joy. Of course, after that joke you made about Richard, Ransom just needed to assert his dominance. Then his temper tantrum would be over. “Daddy, I’m sorry—”

“Now I don’t think you’re being sincere; you’re just telling me what I want to hear—”

“No, daddy, I’m so sorry—”

But he hit you again.

And okay, fuck him—you had just been telling him what he wanted to hear. You were done. “Stop!”

“Or what?”

“Ransom, I swear—”

He wrapped his arm around you, grasping your neck so he could yank you up. His forearm was pressed hard between your breasts, his elbow digging into your side where he held you tight against his chest. “You made a mess of my gloves, clean them.”

Before you could argue, he shoved his hand into your mouth. You were refusing to obey, however, which he realized when your mouth was completely still. His solution was to force his fingers down your throat until you were gagging violently.

When you realized he wasn’t going to give, you started sucking. You could feel his sweater against your back. It shouldn’t have been able to calm you down, but fuck…this was Ransom. This sweater-wearing asshole was apparently the man you loved—how fucking stupid could you be?

He began dragging you to the sliding door. Ransom’s house was pretty secluded and the only other people that regularly showed up was the help. Three weeks prior, you had pointed out that there was no point in having a sliding glass door if you didn’t have a dog. That was your subtle hint that that was what you wanted.

He flat out refused and you guys had ended up screaming at each other until he held you against the glass and fucked you silent. He had enjoyed it, but you couldn’t relate.

Once more, he pressed you into the glass, lifting your arms over your head. You tried to recoil the second you felt the cold surface against your breasts but he just pushed you back harder. You began turning your head pointedly, his fingers were still in your mouth but you knew he would take the hint.

Finally, he pulled them free and began brushing your hair away from your face. “What do you need, baby?”

“You are such a fucking asshole, Ransom!”

“And you are disrespectful.”

“Why the hell should I respect you?”

“Keep it up, baby, we already have a long night ahead of us. You really wanna let this go on tomorrow, too?”

You couldn’t, you knew that with total certainty. Your body was worn out, the only thing that was keeping you going was the anger you felt. You dreaded imagining how sore your muscles would be when you woke up the next morning.

“Now,” he sighed, feigning patience, “Try not to make a mess of my gloves again, or I’ll make you clean them again.” He reached between your legs and began rubbing his fingers quickly over your clit.

“Ransom!” you cried, attempting to push your body back against his. You could not keep doing this. “Stop, please!”

“No.”

That was all he said, the last thing, in fact, even though you didn’t stop talking the whole time. The whole nine almost-finishes he gave you, that he would stop in the middle of because you kept “making a mess”.

He had to know when you were truly almost spent because that was when he tore his pants out of his way and without even a teasing remark, thrust into you. It took a mere two thrusts before you fell apart.

The glass was stained with streaks from your skin, sweat, tears, and probably other bodily fluids, and you hated that the housekeeper would know why. God, he was the fucking worst person on the planet.

He never gave you a moment, he just kept fucking you through your orgasm and then after because now he needed to finish. “Tell me you’re not going to leave me,” he ordered.

You were more than just confused, wondering briefly if you’d even heard him correctly. “What?”

He let both hands grasp your hips and he pushed into you harder. “Tell me that you’re never going to leave me.”

You turned your head back, attempting to be coherent through the whining and mewling. “What—the fuck—are you talking about?”

“Even if this shit all goes wrong,” he explained. “Even if I get caught. Right now, tell me that you’re not gonna fucking leave. Say you won’t leave me.”

“Of course, I’m never—going to leave, you fucking idiot.” You turned forward, eyes shutting because you didn’t want to be looking at him when you said this. “I love you.”

His hips stuttered and he froze buried inside you, but you weren’t going to acknowledge what you’d just said. He pulled out just to turn you to him, lifting you so he could properly fuck you against the door.

Your legs hung loose around him but your tied arms could successfully hold around his neck. And just like that, the fight was over. Neither of you would probably ever bring up a single thing said during this disastrous night. He just kissed the side of your face as he told you how good your pussy felt.

[marveloussupernerd]

It’s Good Luck - Jumin Han

This is the last part (maybe? Idk) of my Jumin wedding series bc all of a sudden I have baby fever and want to write a pregnant series oop. In fact, I had to FORCE myself to write this ceremony. I might write a reception chapter later, who knows. Reminder: this is part of a mini-series but everything can be read and interpreted as one shots if you’re like me and dislike series haha also idk if this even makes sense but I hope you maybe like it?

Summary: they say rain on your wedding day is good luck. Jumin takes that to a new level and proposes you go outside in the rain before you’re due at the reception.

You had returned to your dressing room, watching as the men in the sharp suits carried your flowers and chairs from the tent outside to the building. Why did it have to rain? Sure, they said it was good luck, and you didn’t truly care so long as you were marrying Jumin, but you had looked forward to the outdoor wedding. You had planned for an outdoor wedding, not one inside.

“Don’t worry about it,” your wedding planner comforted you, noticing your mournful expression as you looked at the heavy raindrops running down the window, “We’re going to do everything in our power to bring the outdoors in. Do you want to give it a look-over before we start everything?”

Honestly? It would make you feel better. You nodded, standing up and straightening out your wedding dress. You followed behind her, taking the back way to avoid any guests, and made your way into their indoor venue.

They did a really good job for such a short amount of time. The wall of flowers was up behind the altar, large flower arrangements were set by each row of seats, and gigantic mounds of flowers lined each side of the aisle. It was pretty. Yes, outside would have been ideal, but whatever. This was lovely as well!

“Is it to your liking?” The wedding planner asked, nervously toying with her watch.

You nodded. “It’s very nice. Would it be possible, maybe, to get a different color table cover for the altar? The cream worked well for the outdoors but now it’s a little too... casual.” You had learned a thing or two from planning the RFA parties after all.

“Would you prefer white then?”

“How about an antique white? You cringed internally; you sounded so uptight. But you knew antique white would look best with the color tones of the room. “Oh! If you don’t have it just normal white will do as well.”

“Don’t worry about it. I’ll get it set up right now. Any other changes you’d like to make?”

“Is there any way to dim the lights? They’re a little bright... it’s giving me a hospital feel.” You added awkwardly. Your wedding planner walked over to a panel and immediately dimmed the lights. “Perfect. It’s lovely. Thank you for doing all this,” you turned to her, smiling.

“If that’s all you need, I’ll get somebody to switch out the cloth and then we can start seating guests,” she offered. You smiled and nodded.

When you arrived at your room you were greeted with even more surprises: this time there was a masseuse, table set up and everything. “Hi, are you MC? Mr. Han called for me,” she greeted, holding out a hand for you to shake, which you took.

“Oh! What a nice surprise.”

“Yes, he said it was quite urgent. I understand this all must be pretty stressful. My wedding got rained out too, but the good thing is my husband and I have been married for over thirty years now.” The lady seemed very warm; her presence was comforting. You allowed yourself to sit down on the edge of her table.

“I’m not sure how much time we have, but would you mind doing my shoulders and back? I’ve got a lot of tension in there from everything going on.” You still felt awkward being accomadated so well, but it was something you had to get used to, especially because you were marrying Jumin.

“Of course,” you felt her push your veil to the side, fingers gently working around your upper back. “You weren’t kidding: you are tense. Did you have trouble sleeping last night?”

You let out a laugh. “That tradition that the groom can’t see the bride on the wedding day. I’ve been sleeping next to my fiancée for months now. It was hard not to, and the pre-wedding jitters didn’t help.”

“Well,” she commented, her hands hitting a knot by your shoulders and gently trying to work it out. “I can tell it’ll all be worth it. He seems like a very nice man, and he definitely cares about you.”

“Yes, I’m not sure how many other brides get masseuses in minutes before their wedding,” you joked, a fond smile on your face. A knock at the door. The wedding planner peeked in. “You’ve got about five minutes until it’s go time.”

You thanked the lady and went to take your spot, waiting for your entrance. As you heard the bridal march start playing, you anxiously stepped into the room, heavy bouquet in hand. The antique white looked quite nice, you thought to yourself. It was a good choice. In front of the tablecloth though.

How could he possibly be even more handsome than usual? Maybe it was the light gray suit, a stark contrast to his typical black attire. Maybe it was the glisten in his eyes as they watered with tears. Maybe it was the smile that he couldn’t hide- no, he didn’t want to hide. Walking to him felt like running a marathon; it took forever.

Finally your hands were in his. Him mouthing how beautiful you looked, wiping away a stray tear that leaked down his cheek. You didn’t realize you had such a death grip on his hands until he started gently running his thumb over your hands, easing the tension.

“You and me only, remember?” He whispered softly. You wanted to hug him. No, that would be weird. The priest was quite literally in the middle of his speech. You but your lip and looked down at your shoes.

A hand on your cheek brought your attention up. Was this allowed? Why did you never go through this wedding etiquette?

The words spoken were a blur. Jumin recited his vows perfectly, not straying from the traditional vows. The two of you had agreed that you would rather share those thoughts, those emotions, in private. You stumbled over the words when it was your turn. For richer or for poorer? Not only was the statement comical considering the Hans’ wealth, but why was it so hard to say? Jumin’s lips quirked into a smile upon hearing you fumble, and it made you feel better to see him smile like that.

Finally, finally the moment had come. “You may now kiss the bride.” Swept up in the moment, Jumin pulled you close in one swift motion for a kiss. You had agreed to keep it chaste and sweet, but he hadn’t seemed to remember that part of it!!!!! You pulled away before it got too PG-13, planting a kiss on his cheek and promising him more later.

“How soon is later?” He asked, pouting for what was likely one of the first times in his life. “I just want to embrace my wife. We still have a reception after this?” He groaned.

“You’re so needy today Honey,” you teased, the two of you sharing your own moment at the front of the room while the guests filed out.

“We don’t have to do anything. It’s just... I had trouble sleeping last night without you. You can’t blame a man for wanting to hold his wife in his arms and never let go.” He flushed, rubbing the back of his neck.

The guests had finally filed out and it was your turn to leave, greeting them at the exit. “I’ve noticed you saying wife a lot,” you teased, holding his hand tight, your cathedral-length veil wrapped around his free arm so that you wouldn’t trip or get caught up by it.

“Well, I like it.” It was such a simple statement, but it made your heart race. The two of you finished thanking your guests, and it was time for the cocktail hour to start. You and Jumin had planned about ten minutes together without a photographer or anything just so you could take in the events of the day and reflect together. You had been looking forward to it for hours.

“You know all those things you vowed to me?” You asked, staring out the window as he helped you remove your veil. The rain hadn’t slowed; it was wise of you to move it inside.

“Sickness and health, better or worse, rich or poor, those things?” He listed them off as if they were so simple. It made you laugh.

“How about in grace and in stupidity?”

He plopped your veil down on a bench. “What? My love you’re not stu-“

“You wanna go out into the rain with me? It’ll be fun... and we have about eight minutes after to dry off before pictures,” you proposed. It was an AWFUL idea. It was pouring. You had your hair and makeup done. This dress was designer.

“Truly?” He asked, looking skeptically.

“Yeah in retrospect it’s a bad idea. I don’t know, I thought it was good luck or something.”

Out of nowhere, he swept you into his arms, barreling towards the exit to the building. “Jumin!” You shrieked. “I take it back! I said it was a bad idea!”

“But it’s good luck,” he shouted as he swung open the door, trying to be heard over the rain. He looked cautiously at the puddles forming on the sidewalks, then took a deep breath. “In grace and in stupidity?”

“Of course, my husband.”

It was out of a movie. The dramatic kiss in the rain. All the passion Jumin had wanted to put into your kiss when you were standing in front of all your family and friends. The rain dribbling down your back. It made you squeal. He couldn’t stop laughing. He held his hand above your head, attempting to shield your makeup from the rain. It didn’t help.

What felt like eons later, he carried you back inside, setting you on a bench. He tried to keep a serious face, but burst out laughing. You had never heard him laugh so hard.

“Honey? Why are you laughing? Is it my makeup? Jumin!” Nothing could get his attention.

“We may need more than just eight minutes to dry off,” he chuckled, pushing back soaked strands of hair that were hanging on his face. “I’ll call Assistant Kang and let her know.”

“Was it worth it though?” You asked, trying to wipe your face (and failing).

“Oh absolutely,” he pulled you close to him. “I feel luckier already.”