#I’m still scared to talk about this on insta!!

[talkshitgetcrit]

Fuck Drake, fuck Kendrick Lamar, FUCK the Met Gala and above all FUCK THE EUROVISION SONG CONTEST

Time to turn of the goddamn circus and pay attention to what should be on TV.

The West is complicit in genocide, but I AM NOT. We the people are not! I’m sick of it, so fucking sick!

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Follow You Anywhere 1

No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as dubcon/noncon, obsession, controlling behavoiour, and other possible triggers. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: You're online existence threatens to leak into your real life.

Characters: Captain Syverson

Note: I couldn't help myself.

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me <3

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!)

Love you all. You are appreciated and your are worthy. Treat yourself with care. 💖

"So... this is what it looks like today?" You aim your camera at the sky outside your window, "sorry, the screen is kinda in the way."

You let out a nervous chuckle and flip the camera to yourself. You make a silly face. You were never overly fond of your image on the screen but the vlogs help. Like a little diary, mostly for yourself. You and your seven followers on Insta.

You bat your lashes and fix the clip in your hair, "oh, I got this free. Yeah, I bought a new hair oil and they threw this in the bag." You let your thoughts run wild from your tongue. You found a journal too daunting, the blank lines leaving you just as empty. This is easier. "Anyway, I shouldn't have spent the money to begin with."

You give another splintered laugh. The one you let out when you're anxious, or scared, or happy, or even mad.  You bite your lip and catch yourself in your digitized reflection. You stop and turn your camera to your bedroom.

"Today, I'm gonna clean this mess. Me and you guys together."

You scour the room with the lens. Your laundry is piled on the floor and you have a stack of books you need to put on the shelf. It isn't the worst it's been but it's getting cluttered.

"But first, we'll have breakfast, can't start the stream on an empty stomach," you chirp and nearly drop the phone, "oops, uh..." You fix your grip and check the number in the corner. You have one viewer; on a good day, it's three, most days, it's just you talking to the void.

You go into the kitchen, just down the short hall from your bedroom, opening into your living room. You go to the counter and prop up the phone so the camera is on you again. You tap your fingers and hum.

"What should we have for breakfast?" You ask. You don't feel as crazy talking to yourself even if there's really no one watching. "Oo, French toast. Gotta use up the eggs."

You go to the fridge and pull out the eggs and the milk. You bring them back to the counter, shuffling around for a bowl, a whisk, and the cinnamon.

You mix up your ingredients and dip the bread, one piece at a time. You put on a skillet and fry up the slices, presenting a stack of three to the camera. You smile and dust some icing sugar over the top.

“Probably shouldn't have all this sugar for breakfast,” you shrug at the camera, “alright, quick break…” 

You put the stream onto the ‘back soon’ page and take your plate to the small foldout table against the wall. You're not a fan of eating on camera. You finish and rinse up before snatching your phone up again.

You return to your bedroom and put the phone on a middle shelf and flip the stream back to live. Still that one viewer…

“Anyway, I'm back,” you wave at the lens.

You hesitate, looking around as you stand straight and spin. Cleaning, right. Before you can set to work, the phone dings.

A message?

You go back to your phone and squint at the chat bubble floating up.

‘Looked delicious too.’

“It was,” you agree with a grin, “thanks.”

‘Don't mean the toast.’

The next message has you blinking. Your nape burns. They can't mean… you clear your throat and giggle.

“Well, let's get started,” you back up and clap your hands, “you know, I've been so carried away with work. This place is a pigsty.”

You sit on the floor and sort through the clothes. You toss them into the basket as you sit in silence. You stop yourself and glance at the phone.

“How about some tunes?” 

You walk on your knees to your bedside and turn on your bluetooth speaker. You go to your phone and find a playlist before pulling the stream back to full screen. As you do, you hear a noise you've never heard before.

‘BourbonBear has tipped.’ Huh? Really?

“Oh, thanks, er, BourbonBear,” you giggle around the name, “how nice. Maybe one day I can afford a proper camera for this, huh?”

You smile and go back to the dirty clothes. You quickly ball up a pair of panties and shove them in the basket. You carry on until they're all untangled.

You move on and tidy your desk, bending underneath to gather up a few loose pens. You make your way around the bedroom, putting away books, fixing the blankets on the bed, and straightening the little figurines on the shelf above the bed.

You grab the stick vacuum and suck up the dirt and proclaim your task done. It took a lot longer than you thought. It's after eleven. The one viewer is still there.

“Whew, okay, I'm gonna get myself washed up and go to the park. Maybe I'll post that later,” you give a thumbs up next to your head as you talk to the phone, “thank you.”

You end the stream and let out a sigh. Your videos aren't much and you doubt they're very interesting but it's like venting for you. Almost like having an invisible friend. You think you will take some pictures of the flowers to share.

🧸

You take your usual path through the park. The walks help you unwind your worries. You try to come after work at least a couple days during the week and both days on the weekend. You find the mindlessness of the routine to be calming.

The deeper you get into the wooded length of the path, you slow to admire the birds in the branches and the critters crawling in the brush. You take out your phone and snap a few photos of a blue jay before it wings away shyly. You smile and flip the cam, smiling as you take a goofy selfie. You can add that to your post.

The path winds ahead and you follow it in the din, listening to the river just down the incline to your left and the tweeting from the sky. You lift your face and inhale the woodsy scent. The sudden crack of a twig startles you and you spin to face the noise. There's no one there. Sometimes you forget other people are free to just walk on through.

You chuckle at yourself and continue on. The path leads out to a suburban street where you like to look at the houses. They're much more spacious and pretty than your grimy brick apartment building.

You come out from the shade of the trees and wander along the avenue. There's a mailbox painted to look like the house it stands before and a little nook for second hand children's books to be borrowed through the neighbourhood. Sometimes you picture yourself living in one of those houses though you don't think it could ever truly be.

As you crane your head, you sense a shadow in your peripheral. You're walking a bit slow. You sidle to the side to get out of the way of the other pedestrian. When no one passes, you look back. No one.

You must be imagining things. You shrug and plod along. You're already thinking of what kind of tea you'll have when you get in.

🧸

You sit down with your mug of ginger citrus tea and set to editing your post. You add a light filter to the photos as you shuffle through them on your laptop. The process is slow as the computer is nearly five years old now and chuffing on its 4GB drive. You get to the selfie you snapped, a stop.

You lean in to get a better glimpse of the background. It's fuzzy but there's a figure just over your shoulder. How could that be? You looked and there was no one there. That's so strange.

You stare as a chill courses through you. You're thankful you hadn't put your earphones in. You wouldn't have heard whoever it was and they may have even snuck up on you. Or maybe it's just a trick of the light.

You hit ‘post’ and try to shake off the foreboding. It's nothing. You're being silly. Besides, you're home and safe now. Next time, you'll be more alert.

A message pops up. You stare at the dot over the chat bubble. You tap with your thumb and bring up the DMs.

'Stream tonight?' BourbonBear asks.

You tilt your head. You already did some today. You're tired and want to lie down and enjoy your time off. You type back 'sorry, not tonight. tomorrow <3' and another notification vibrates. A comment on your latest post.

'Pretty sweater', also from BourbonBear. You heart their comment and leave a thanks below.

You flip back to the selfie. You can't really see your sweater in the picture, just the scalloped knitting of the collar. Well, you suppose it does look cute. You put your phone down and leave it on your desk. That's enough Insta for today.

🧸

You time your shopping trip for the least busy hour. It's early and the store is almost empty except for employees stacking bread on shelves or wandering listlessly around the deli. You have your phone in the basket of the cart, aimed at you as you roll it along slowly and check your list.

The stream is just as empty. It's only just started but you don't expect too many people to be up at this hour. You stop and grab a loaf of sourdough, checking the date before showing it to the lens and putting it in the cart. You smile and announce the next item.

"Strawberries... you know I was thinking I might get raspberries instead," you say, catching the eye of one of the yawning employees. You must seem like a weirdo. It's why you typically don't film in public.

As you roll around to the fruit, you notice the count change. One viewer. You choose a basket of raspberries and show those. You see a message float up; morning.

You smile and return the greeting softly and place the berries down carefully beside your phone. You need yogurt to go with the berries.

You work down the list, making some substitutes as you tick off each item. You linger in the ice cream section a bit too long and talk yourself out of a gallon of rocky road. You lean on the handle of the cart and smile down at the lens.

"Going to check out," you say, "see you all later."

All? There's still just the one. You end the stream and take your phone out of the basket.

You wheel around to checkout and line up at the only open till. You put your items up as you greet the cashier with a smile. She seems tired as she gives a dull response.

As you put the yogurt on the belt, you sense someone join the queue behind you. You glance over as a large man stands only feet away. He's tall and burly and staring at you. Maybe he heard you talking to your audience, or he would think, yourself. You continue to unload your groceries.

"Never tried those," he comments as you take out a box of strawberry Pocky.

You pause and hold them up, chuckling nervously, as you do.

"Pretty good," you answer, "I eat way too many."

You notice the man doesn't have a basket or a cart. That realisation needles under your skin. Maybe he's just getting lotto or smokes?

"You like sweet stuff."

"Too much," you squeak even though it doesn't sound like a question.

He just stares, not saying a word. You swallow tightly and pull the last few items out of the cart and get behind it to wheel it through the lane. As you do, he looms closely, adding to the sweat gathering on your lower back.

You roll along and wait for the cashier to ring through the rest of your things. She bags them up neatly in two large paper bags. You pay with your card and thank her as you lift the first into your cart. The man behind you moves forward and grabs the second, startling you.

"Got it," he says as he places it with the other, squeezing by you, crowding you.

"Oh, excuse me, sir," you stammer, "oh," you lean on the cart to roll it to the end of the lane as you make space between you and the stranger. "Thanks, er, uh... thanks."

You turn and grab the handle, jittering. He's really weirding you out. Especially as you realise he's walked right by the cashier. He's following you.

"I can help get ‘em in your car," he offers in a drawl.

"Oh, that's alright, I... bus," you cringe as you realise you've said too much.

"I could drive you. I have a truck."

"No thank you," you walk faster, the cart rattling with your pace.

"Why not?"

"I don't know you, erm, sorry--"

"You don't?" He catches up and shoves his phone in your face, your Insta profile glaring back at you, "I paid for the milk, maybe the berries..."

"What?" You stop, just by the door and turn to him. "I don't--"

"You haven't eaten, have you? I'll take you for French toast. That's your favourite."

"Um," you blink at him as your eyes tinge, "I don't..."

"You got me through a hard campaign, just wanna say thank you," he adjusts his cap and you notice the pin on it. He's a veteran. Oh, 'campaign'. 

“Just got back home," he shifts on his feet, a meek gesture for such a large man, "and... your videos helped me remember it. Helped me hold onto it in the sh-- in the stuff."

"I... wow, okay, that's... I'm glad I could do that."

"I really don't mind giving you a ride. Lots of weirdos on the bus," he insists.

"That's nice but--"

"Please," he softens his tone, "been a while since I sat down and had breakfast without worrying about the sky falling."

You shudder and grip the cart tight. You don't know how to say no. You didn't think about who was watching. You always just assumed they were bots. Then you think of the chaching noise and the amount flashing on the screen.

"BourbonBear?" You ask.

"Yeah," he cracks a crooked smile and smooths his hand over his thick beard. "Everyone calls me Syv.”

[milaeth]

୨୧┊ 𝐈𝐈. 𝐉𝐔𝐒𝐓 𝐅𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐃𝐒. ( charles leclerc )

ꖛ ─ you’re reading part two ∿ part one ∿ part three

✧.* pairings ─ charles leclerc x fem! singer! reader

✧.* genre ─ social media au ⨾ fluff & chaotic

✧.* summary ─ in which your best friend George gets fed up with watching you and Charles secretly yearn for each other while claiming to be just friends. so, when you lose a bet to George, he takes control of your social media accounts for 24 hours, using the opportunity to help you make a move on your crush.

✧.* face claim ─ suki waterhouse

✧.* warnings ─ some suggestive jokes, other than that this is just as chaotic as the first part

✧.* mily’s thoughts ─ part three is coming soon! hope you enjoy mwah <3

˗ˏ ➶ IMESSAGE ➜ w/ charles <3 . ✧ ˚

y/n: hey charles i really don’t want to be a bother but i quickly wanted to apologize for the insta post that was made about us a few hours ago!

charles <3: Hey, don’t worry, you’re not a bother! :) And I don’t really care about the post.

y/n: wait

y/n: you don’t care?

charles <3: Nope, I thought the whole flirting thing (the comments etc) was just a joke between friends, yk. At first I was a little confused, to be honest, since we don't usually joke like that, but I figured it was just the way you interact with people you feel more comfortable with!

[ seen 1:29pm ]

˗ˏ ➶ IMESSAGE ➜ w/ princess george . ✧ ˚

y/n: i’m so scared

princess george: WHAT DID HE SAY

y/n: he thinks it was a flirty joke between friends

princess george: HUH? So I did all that painfully obvious flirting for nothing💀

y/n: AHA

y/n: SO YOU DID DO ALL THESE THINGS TO GET ME TO CONFESS TO CHARLES.

princess george: Someone had to do it! I'm sick of watching you guys literally be in love with the other and still claim to be "just friends" 🤓

y/n:🧍‍♀️

y/n: that isn’t the point now

y/n: the point is WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO SAY

princess george: YOU HAVENT REPLY YET??

y/n: NO I LEFT HIM ON READ BC I PANICKED IDK

princess george: i'm going to have to call carmen to give you some girly advice if you don't start getting bold💀

y/n: OKAYOKAY BUT WHAT SHOULD I SAY

y/n: HURRY UP HES BEEN ON SEEN FOR FIVE MINUTES NOW

princess george: IDK ASK GOOGLE

y/n: GEORGE WTF

princess george: DONT ‘GEORGE WTF’ ME! YOU KNOW I DONT WORK WELL UNDER PEER PRESSURE

y/n: you’re a racing driver💀

princess george: your point?

[ seen 1:37pm ]

princess george: hello???

[ seen 1:38pm ]

y/n: I ASKED GOOGLE LIKE YOU TOLD ME TO AND THEY DIDNT DO SHIT

y/n: they had the audacity to correct me too

princess george: 💀💀

[ seen 1:40pm ]

˗ˏ ➶ IMESSAGE ➜ w/ charles <3 . ✧ ˚

y/n: you think it was a joke?

charles <3: Well yeah

charles <3 I mean

charles <3: It couldn’t have been anything more

y/n: what if it was tho?

y/n: hypothetical ofc!!!!

charles <3: Well I honestly don’t know

charles <3: If we are speaking hypothetically, I think I would be flattered.

y/n: and if we aren’t speaking hypothetically?

charles <3: Then I would probably still feel flattered.

charles <3: Y/n? Hello?

y/n: SORRY MY PHONE FELL DOWN

charles <3: LMAO

charles <3: Does that mean those flirty jokes weren’t just jokes?

y/n: well.. to me, they’re not jokes, but i’m not the one who made them. i wasn’t supposed to tell you yet but i’m getting sick of george so idc

y/n: i lost a bet to him and had to hand over my main social media accounts for 24 hours, meaning all the comments/posts you saw from my main accounts were made by george😭

charles <3: That explains why I saw your private accounts constantly fight with your main accounts in random comment sections💀

y/n: yeah he was really messing with me

y/n: i’ve gotten lots of angry mails from my pr team

charles <3: I can imagine😭 It's only fair that you get back at him.

y/n: oh absolutely.

charles <3: Can I ask a question though?

y/n: sure!

charles <3: Is your newest single actually about me?

y/n: yes it is. i’m sorry you have to find out like this but i really like you, like a lot. i’ve liked you for a while now but i was too scared to talk to you about it because i thought you don’t feel the same.

charles <3: That’s not true

charles <3: I actually do feel the same, and I literally had the same dilemma!

y/n: WHAT

y/n: YOU ALSO LIKE ME??

charles <3: YES!! I really like you :)

y/n: SINCE WHEN

charles <3: Probably since the day I first met you

y/n: no way i thought you hated me back then💀

charles <3: No don’t worry I didn’t😭 My brother Arthur said I always have this certain look to myself when I meet new people. He said I tend to look a little “off” when I’m overwhelmed, so that was probably it lol

y/n: oh yeah, george said the same about you

charles <3: Aha very nice of him💀

charles <3: Btw I don’t want to make you uncomfortable by asking this, but what are we now? I’m just a little confused

y/n: how about we take it slow and start going on little dates? like trying this whole thing out and seeing if we can actually be more than friends.

charles <3: I had the same in mind :)

charles <3: And George still has control over your main accounts?

y/n: yep for the next 2-3 hours :’)

charles <3: alright, ready to get back at him?

y/n: ABSOLUTELY

[ seen 1:59pm ]

˗ˏ ➶ IMESSAGE ➜ w/ princess george . ✧ ˚

princess george: Y/N DID HE REPLY YET?

[ sent 1:43pm ]

princess george: Y/N?

princess charles: HELLOOOO

[ sent 1:44pm ]

princess george: CMON I CAN SEE YOURE ONLINE

[ sent 1:46pm ]

princess george: DONT BE SO CRUEL

princess george: PLEASEEE

princess george: I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SAID

[ sent 1:50pm ]

princess george: UGH fine

princess george: Guess my finger slipped again🙄🙄🙄

[ sent 1:55pm ]

yourusername

liked by danielricciardo, georgerussell63 and 8,379,158 others

yourusername save a horse, ride a char- COWBOY

tagged: charles_leclerc

view all 268,368 comments…

user375 HELP ME WHAT

user121 girl you gotta stop being horny on the internet😭

georgerussell63 Oh. My. God.😲😲 Y/n this isn’t your private account

user54 you’re acting very sus there mate

user488 well someone needs to get laid💀

user224 simp of the day🫵

pierregasly i can’t watch this

yourusername then look away🤷‍♀️😂

user865 you’re so relatable

user308 cowboy charles😍😍

urusername_alt🔒 YOU DID NOT

yourusername I did xx

urusername_alt🔒 DELETE THIS RN

yourusername Nopee

carlos55sainz I’m so confused

charles_leclerc my lap is free🤷🏻‍♂️🤷🏻‍♂️

yourusername WHAT

urusername_alt🔒 wait- fr?🤭🤭

landonorris pause. stop right there.

yourusername | 📍 paris, france

liked by senelagomez, carlos55sainz and 21,488,321 others

yourusername feels good to finally have this account back

view all 170,325 comments…

zendaya stunning as always✨

liked by yourusername

user965 mother is mothering🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️

user233 does a stronger word than mother exist??

user355 @/charlesleclerc you better wife her up before i do

user212 there’s no way they’re actually together, now that she revealed that george was behind all those comments/posts

user593 i was NOT prepared

charles_leclerc come to monaco, we miss you

landonorris who’s we

yourusername @/landonorris stfu you salty bitch, you’re just jealous i didn’t visit you last year💀

charles_leclerc just added to their story !

∿ taglist ─ @81astri @ch3rryknots @cs55version @fdl305 @remuslupinsbtch @kissesandmartinis @teenagedreams-cl @headinthecloudssblog @mrsmaybank13 @glai1023-blog @luvrrish @hevburn @charlespear @bibissparkles @siovhanroy ( my taglist if you want to get tagged in my works )

don’t forget to like, comment & reblog (it’s very much appreciated <3).

© milaeth | 2023

[rosemariiaa]

~The Weight of Want~

part: 5

pairing: Paige x Azzi

a/n: surprise,this is kind of rushed and shorter than expected!! happy reading lovelies 💌

themes: teasing , language, drinking

The leaves outside were turning shades of orange and gold, and the air had that crispness that signaled Halloween was just around the corner. Paige stood in front of the mirror, adjusting her hat, feeling more anxious than she’d like to admit. It had been almost a year since everything had “fallen apart” , and while she had tried to take Caroline’s advice to heart—focusing more on her studies, basketball, and just enjoying life—tonight felt different.

What if Azzi was there? The thought sent a rush of anxiety through her. Fuck. I haven’t seen her in months. They’d left things on somewhat good terms, but there had been no real closure. The idea of seeing that doe-eyed brunette again, with her cheeky smile and deep dimples, sent a rush of warmth through her. Get it together, Paige. It’s been a year.. But were you really ever over someone who made your heart race just by being in the same room?

“Yo P! Are you ready yet, or are you just gonna stand there and stare at yourself all night?” KK’s voice cut through her thoughts, impatience thick in the air.

“Yeah, just—” she started, but KK barged in, a teasing grin plastered on her face.

KK leaned against the door frame, arms crossed. “You look like a grinning tomato. Are you ready to scare people with that outfit or what?” Paige rolled her eyes, letting out a nervous laugh. “It’s not that bad! Just give me a sec!”

“Seriously, though, why are you so jittery?” KK asked, raising an eyebrow. “You’re acting like you’re about to walk into an exam you didn’t study for or something.” “I’m not jittery!” Paige protested, but the high pitch of her voice gave her away. I’m totally jittery.

KK stepped into the room, inspecting her costume. “Oh, really? Because you’ve been checking your phone like it’s a fucking lifeline.

Paige thumped KK’s forehead again, causing her to stumble back, hands flying up in mock defense. “Shut up. I’m just making sure I have everything I need.”

KK smirked, leaning in closer. “Look at you, still worried about something. What’s really going on?”

Paige tried to shake off the feeling, but it wouldn’t leave. “Nothing, okay? It’s just… I might be a little nervous about tonight.”

KK crossed her arms and leaned in, eyes narrowed playfully. “Nervous about what? You know it’s just a party, right? It’s not like you’re going to a funeral.”

“Yeah, but—what if…Azzi is there?” Paige blurted, her voice barely above a whisper. The thought of seeing Azzi again sent a shiver down her spine, and she couldn’t shake it off.

KK raised an eyebrow, an amused smirk creeping onto her face. “Oh god, don’t get your hopes up! You haven’t even spoken to her in forever! You think she’s just gonna pop up outta nowhere?”

“I don’t know!” Paige snapped, her nerves getting the best of her. “I mean, she doesn’t even like these types of events. But… still.”

“Girl, boo! Don’t get any ideas!” KK teased, shaking her head. “I’m over that! We’ve both moved on—she’s with Laila. She’s fine,” Paige insisted, though the words felt a little hollow.

“Yeah, about that…” KK said, raising an eyebrow. “I heard Laila cheated on her.”

“Wait, what? Seriously?” Paige’s heart skipped a beat. That’s… actually kind of great. “Good for her. I mean… fuck Laila, honestly.”

“Oh god, you’re so pussy whipped!” KK exclaimed, laughing at her friend.

Paige opened her mouth to protest, but nothing came out. KK shot her a knowing look. “Yeah, exactly. You haven’t even talked or fucked any girls since that talk with Azzi. Hell, you can’t even look at anyone else unless you’re stalking Azzi’s Insta.”

Paige fell silent, her heart racing as KK’s words hung in the air. She knew it was true, and that realization settled uncomfortably in her stomach. I can’t be this way. But I can’t help.

“Let’s just go, okay?” Paige finally said, brushing off the tension as she grabbed her bag. “We’re gonna be late.”

KK laughed again, clearly enjoying the view of the angry blonde. “Alright, alright! Just don’t get all mopey on me tonight. We’re here to have fun!”

As they left the apartment, Paige’s mind raced with a mix of excitement and anxiety. With a final glance in the mirror, she reminded herself that she wasn’t that scared girl anymore. Tonight was about having fun, enjoying herself, and maybe, just maybe, reconnecting with someone she had lost.

As they made their way to the party, Paige felt a flicker of hope amidst the nerves. Whatever happens, I’ll handle it. I’m ready. But are you?

———-

Azzi stood in front of her mirror, giving herself a once-over. The red cropped V-line top clung to her like it was made just for her, and those matching shorts? They fit her ass perfectly. She slipped into her red ankle boots, feeling like a total badass. The devil horns in her curls added the perfect touch—she felt like a cute little menace.

“Fuck Laila,” she muttered, still remembering how that whole shitshow had unfolded. Catching Laila in bed with some girl from accounting had stung, but the aftermath? So much better. She thinks she can just lie her way out? Nope, not this time. Surprisingly, Azzi had bounced back quicker than she expected. Maybe it was because she realized she didn’t need the drama.

Since then, she had tried going out with a few girls. But each time, it felt like they were just a distraction. Whatever, I don’t need that right now. She shrugged off the thought. Tonight was about fun, not some half-assed date that wasn’t going anywhere.

“Are you ready yet, Az? You’re taking forever!” Caroline’s voice broke through her thoughts, pulling her back to reality.

“Yeah, yeah! Chill, I’m coming!” Azzi shouted back, giving herself one last look. The flutter of anxiety mixed with excitement in her stomach as she thought about the party. What if Paige was there?

Get it together, girl. She took a deep breath, shaking off the nerves. It’s been months. You’ve got this.

As she stepped out of her room, she could hear the laughter and chatter of her friends in the living room. They were buzzing with energy, and she couldn’t help but feel it too. Tonight was going to be wild, and she was ready to let loose. With one last glance in the mirror, she adjusted her devil horns, smirking at her reflection. If Paige showed up, cool. If not? Whatever. She was done worrying about things that were out of her control.

“Let’s go!” she called out, confidence surging through her. Tonight, she was going to enjoy herself, and nothing was going to hold her back.

———-

Paige’s Pov

As I step into the bar, the energy hits me like a wave. It’s packed, and I scan the room, heart pounding when I spot Azzi leaning against the bar, a playful smile dancing on her lips as she chats with some guys. She’s wearing a fitted red top that draws the eye. my eye. And I can’t help but feel a mix of nerves and excitement. After everything that happened, this feels like a test.

Taking a deep breath, I make my way over, trying to look casual. “Hey,” I say, the word barely escaping my lips. Azzi turns to me, eyebrows raised, surprise flickering in her eyes. “Hey,” she replies, her voice steady but cautious. “How are you?”

“Good,” I say too quickly, my heart racing. “You? I heard about… well, you know.” I try to keep my tone light, but it feels heavy. She shrugs, her expression hardening a little. “It’s whatever,” she says dismissively, taking a sip of her drink. “How’ve you been?”

I swallow, wishing I had something witty to say. “Oh, you know, the usual. Just… focusing on basketball.” I glance down, feeling a twinge of discomfort. We stand in awkward silence, both sipping our drinks. The tension hangs between us, thick and unyielding. It feels surreal to be in the same space after everything, and I can’t help but steal glances at her.

“Been hanging out with anyone special?” Azzi asks, tilting her head slightly. There’s a teasing lilt to her voice, but I can sense the underlying curiosity.

I shake my head, my heart sinking a little. “Not really. Just been busy. How about you?”

She smirks, but it doesn’t quite reach her eyes. “Sure, no one at all? You really expect me to believe that, Paige?”

I feel my cheeks heat up. “Yeah, I do. I haven’t talked to anyone since… you know.”

Her expression softens again, just a flicker, but it’s enough to catch me off guard. “Oh. Right.”

Another moment of silence stretches between us, and I can’t help but steal another glance. It’s strange, seeing her like this—confident but still vulnerable.

———-

Hours later

A little while later, I notice she’s already four shots down, laughing a bit too loudly. “Damn, Azzi, slow down!” I call out, amusement lacing my tone.

She just sticks her tongue out at me, a defiant grin on her face. “No way!”

I chuckle, shaking my head. “Whatever you say, little drunken devil.” I hop up on the bar next to her, facing her directly. “Want a sip?” I push my drink towards her.

Azzi takes the glass, swirling the straw a little while keeping intense eye contact with me. She takes a sip and lets out a soft moan at the taste. I can’t help but stare, captivated by the girl in front of me, a rush of memories flooding back.

“Stop staring,” she teases, but there’s a softness in her voice.

“I can’t help it,” I admit, feeling the heat rise in my cheeks.

Her smile widens as she leans in a little closer, her lips barely a breath away. “You’re really trying to play it cool, huh? Because it’s not working.”

“Yeah, well, you know me,” I reply, trying to sound nonchalant, but I can feel my heart pounding. “Always cool under pressure.”

Azzi leans back slightly, crossing her arms with a playful smirk. “Right. Like the time you tripped over your own feet in front of everyone during practice?”

I laugh, the memory fresh. “Okay, that was one time! But it was just a… tactical error!” “Sure, Paige. Tactical,” she says with a wink, and I feel the warmth in my cheeks deepen.

Suddenly, she hops off her chair and moves closer, her body mere inches from mine. Then, out of nowhere, she asks, “Do you miss me?”

The question takes me off guard, and I blink at her, trying to process. “Uh, yeah. Did you?”

Azzi bites her bottom lip, a small nod confirming what I’m hoping to hear. “A lot.”

That makes me smile, and without thinking, I tuck a loose strand of hair behind her ear, my fingers brushing against her soft skin. “I’ve missed you,” I say, my gaze drifting over her outfit. I lick my lips.

Azzi notices, her lips curling into a mischievous smile. “Is that better?” she asks, pulling the zipper of her top down slightly, revealing a hint more cleavage.

I smirk, nodding. “Definitely.”

Wrapping my hands around her waist, I pull her closer, staring deep into her brown eyes, my heart racing as I scan her face. The moment stretches between us, thick with unspoken words. I can feel the tension building, and before I can think too much about it, I whisper, “Can I kiss you?”

Without waiting for my full permission, Azzi closes the gap between us, her lips crashing onto mine. The kiss is electric, filled with urgency and desire. I can’t help but explore her back with my hands, finally letting them drop down to her ass. She sighs against my mouth, the sound sending shivers down my spine.

We break apart, breathless, both trying to catch our breaths.

Azzi looks up at me, her gaze softer now. “I’m tired. I wanna go home.”

“Okay,” I reply, still trying to process everything that just happened.

She looks up at me, her thumb grazing my cheek, then my lips. “Can you take me home, P?”

My breath hitches, and I nod, my heart racing. “Yeah, I can do that.”

———-

goodnight 😊

tags: @thaatdigitaldiary @patscorner @ohbueckers @sierrale8ne @mrsarnold @absolutelydreadful

[buddiebeginz]

I know not everything the actors say in interviews is accurate but I’m pretty sure in the beginning of the season Oliver talked about how Buck was going to have to work for his next relationship. He talked very deliberately about how Buck has always had relationships come easy. In that he’ll like someone and then end up with them without having to really fight for them. He said Buck's next relationship was going to be different, yet things with T*mmy feel exactly the same as how it’s felt with most of the women Buck's been with. Where the relationship comes easy and it’s mostly based on sex and the person doesn’t really know who Buck is at his core.

I can’t help but wonder if Tim told Oliver that he was planning on making Buddie happen this season or at least moving them closer to happening and it got pushed into s8. In the beginning of this season we had a lot of joint Ryan and Oliver interviews more so than in previous years. Oliver also did a lot of posting/liking about Buddie and Ryan on insta. He also talked about Buddie in all his interviews more than in previous seasons. Given how Oliver has said multiple times in the past that he didn't want to lead people on about Buddie I can't help but feel like he thought things were going to play out differently.

If you watch the beginning of s7 it feels like we’re heading towards something important happening with Buddie. We had a lot of Buddie scenes including the locker room scene, the scene where Buddie talk about underlying sexual tension, the scene where Buck is showing how much he's like Chris' other dad, Buddie working together on multiple calls including rescuing Bobby together. Then of course there was 704 which was like a flashing neon sign saying Buck has feelings for Eddie and is scared Eddie is going to replace him.

Then in 705 it was Eddie who interrupts Buck's first date with a guy. It's Eddie that is the focus of the conversation where Buck comes out to Maddie, where she tells him that if he has something he needs to tell Eddie he will in his own time. Then we get a very intimate scene where Buck comes out to Eddie, including a lot of shared looks between them and a hug. Also of note that Buck only had two coming out scenes in the whole season and Eddie was chosen to be one of them. There was also the gym scene where they talked about Eddie's sex life.

To me it feels like Tim changed course around 706 when he cut a lot of Buddie stuff from the ep especially the karaoke scene. I know a lot of things were likely cut for time but still they shot a scene of Buddie being all touchy feely singing a karaoke love song for the Madney wedding ep. Karaoke was one of the first things Madney did when they were falling for one another it was too much of a parallel for it not to mean something.

I think 706 was really supposed to be a bigger Buddie episode than it turned out to be. This may also be why so much of the promo stuff was about Buddie. I think originally this was going to be the episode to start officially letting the audience know there was something there between them. You can also see parts of the original story where they had Buddie joined at the hip after the bachelor party (helping Maddie and looking for Chim) everything came off very coupley.

This may also explain why Abuela is at the wedding and Marisol isn't (more about Marisol later). I wonder if originally we were going to get some kind of scene with Abuela and Eddie where she says something about Buck. There's no way they brought her in to just stand in the background like an extra there had to have been a purpose for her character originally.

I think Tim changed course when he decided he wanted to do the Kim/Shannon Vertigo mess. Which I don’t get why someone didn’t step in and tell him how ridiculous this idea was especially in this short of a season. I feel like Tim wanted to do something artsy and also get Devin Kelley back on the show and this was how he chose to do that. Unfortunately though the story turned into a mess and worse I feel like parts of Eddie's emotional journey that deserved more focus were lost. Like even the general audience didn't know what to make of that scene where Kim was dressed up as Shannon.

The Vertigo story might also be a part of why there were rumours that Edy had finished filming prior to this storyline starting in 707. Maybe she thought she had but was brought back in for this storyline. Who knows? This season was basically being written almost as they were filming it and I'm pretty sure Tim was changing things left and right. You can see that more in some episodes vs others and definitely more the later the season goes on.

I also think that would explain why so little thought and time was put into both Eddie's relationship with Marisol and Buck's thing with T*mmy. I don't think either relationship was supposed to last the entire season. There was talk early on in s7 that Lou was only supposed to be around for something like four episodes definitely a short run. In interviews Oliver also made it seem like B/T wasn't going to last and that T*mmy eventually was going to be more of a mentor type figure for Buck.

Lou also used the word rom-com when referring to B/T. Although take that with a grain of salt because it may have been on one of his cameos and he said all kinds of stuff on there. But you can see rom-com love triangle type stuff being set up in 704/705/706 between Buck, Eddie, and T*mmy and then T*mmy just kind of disappears (until 709) and the Kim/Shannon thing happens.

This would explain why there is so little development in s7 for T*mmy and B/T's relationship to the point that they never even defined that relationship by the end of the season. They never even had Buck call him his boyfriend. Which I'm glad for that in a way but it just goes to show how bad the writing was this season. And as much as I want Buddie and as much as I dislike Lou and T*mmy I'm also really sad for Oliver because this is not the coming out storyline Buck deserved.

In 707 there was zero mention of T*mmy and this is also when the Kim/Shannon storyline started so I think this is when we see some significant changes to the storyline from wherever things were originally set to go. Though the scene with Buddie and Chris I think some of that was from whatever had been originally planned. It's too flirty to explain otherwise. Maybe originally it was going to be something where Eddie and Chris spend time at Buck's loft but because there was the Kim storyline they wrote it with Eddie leaving for the date.

The thing is Buck's feelings for Eddie throughout this whole season have been louder and more apparent than we've ever seen them be before. Oliver is clearly playing Buck as in love with Eddie. Go back and watch the scene in 704 where Eddie talks about clicking with T*mmy and see how Buck looks like his heart has broken into a million pieces. Or the way Buck watches Eddie in the coming out scene in 705. Or Buck's face in 709 after he said he was worried about Eddie. It's just so obvious that man loves Eddie and would do anything for him.

This is why I really thought there was a good probability of us getting an oh moment feelings realization from Buck in the finale or at the very least a moment where they hugged and consoled each other over losing their son. But we didn't even get that.

I'm honestly not surprised that Oliver went quiet on social media during the back half of s7. Throughout the whole season Oliver wasn't really showing support for B/T and he talked very little about the ship in his interviews. I think this was originally because the plan was for B/T only to be a short term thing and Oliver didn't want to lead anyone on about that ship. I also personally think Oliver has wanted to see Buddie happen for years so he's not going to be rooting for another ship.

I also get the vibe Oliver's not crazy about working with Lou. Anytime you see behind the scenes video and pics of the cast Lou isn't in them or if he is no one is interacting with him. You can also see in the one interview Oliver did with Lou that the chemistry between them just isn't there. They feel more like coworkers just doing their job vs how Ryan and Oliver always appear like giggling besties in every interview and behind the scenes thing we see them in.

Like others have said I'm just sad for Oliver. I think once Tim told Oliver about them wanting to do the bi Buck storyline he must have been so excited. He's talked in interviews about how he's always seen Buck as bi so he must have been thrilled when they said they were finally taking his character there. And for all the issues this season Buck's coming out is still an incredibly important storyline and has meant a lot to so many people. Oliver has even talked about all the people that have messaged him and how deeply they've been affected by a character like Buck coming out.

Still I'm sure Oliver wants more for Buck's love life than the lackluster relationship that he's been stuck with. You can tell in how he talks about Buddie that he wants to see that relationship happen and that he wants to make sure it's done right and doesn't play into stereotypes.

I just hate that T*mmy is the first guy they've stuck Buck with. I hate that Tim and the show have done nothing with this relationship. We don't even really know by the end of s7 how Buck feels about T*mmy or how he feels having been dating a guy for months. Some of that should have been revisited maybe with a talk between Buck and Maddie. But it's like others have said they made Buck bi and then just kind of forgot about him. I think though that's because like I said Tim pushed everything to the side to focus on the Vertigo plot and also all the stuff with Bobby to the detriment of everything else. Buddie was the original plan and Tim didn't really have much else for Buck to do so they left him in this nothing relationship.

I really hope s8 is better all around not just for Buddie but for Buck and Eddie as characters. I hope that Tim plans to follow through and actually make Buddie a reality not just because so many people ship them because of how important for queer representation a ship like Buddie becoming canon could be. I also want to see Oliver actually get to play Buck in a relationship he's proud to talk about.

[eilishalways]

⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆

all you wanna do is kiss me - pt 2

summary: a follow up to the first part 🤭

warnings: alcohol consumption & people being tipsy

a/n: I HOPE THIS ISNT BAD LMAOO

it was two nights after the grammys, and billie was fretting. you had given her your number at the end of the night, but billie was still too scared to text you. she lay in her bed, not knowing what to do. you were very nice about giving her your number - eager, almost, but billie was still too nervous? what if she said something weird? what if you didn’t want to talk to her? there were so many bad scenarios possible.

billie looked at the time. it was 5 to midnight. would you even be up? would you be asleep? were you talking to someone else? she was scared. very scared. she went downstairs and made herself some coffee, and sat at the breakfast table. she contemplated what to do. as she was scrolling through instagram, she saw you had made a new post. two images, both very risqué. the caption was just the telephone emoji. billie blushed, and took it as a sign to text you. so she did.

billie sent you a simple ‘hey’, not expecting you to reply till morning. but within five minutes you responded back with ‘who’s this?’. billie had forgotten that you had only given her your number, and you hadn’t exchanged them.

it’s billie

oh hey!! how are you?

i’m good, hbu?

the conversation continued well into the night. it was 4am when you finally said ‘look, i’ve gtg now. it’s really late.’ billie was sad but responded with ‘yeah it’s super late’. but before you went to sleep you asked her ‘would you like to come round to my house tomorrow? well, technically today.’ billie immediately typed back with ‘i’d love that’

sounds good. i’ll send you my address later. also - bring a swimsuit. we can get in my pool!

that sounds really nice! what time should i be there for?

uhhh, maybe at half 6 or 7? i’ll cook up a bit of dinner.

sounds great! see you then!

despite billie’s coolness over text, she was absolutely freaking out. dinner at your house??? getting in your pool???? she wasn’t able to sleep after that, too nervous to focus on anything else. thankfully she wasn’t doing anything that day, so she could try to figure out what to wear and should she bring anything.

fast forward to midday, billie was eating her lunch, still thinking over what she might wear? a tshirt and jeans? a dress? a jumper? the options were endless, but none seemed right. she couldn’t just ask you what to wear as well - that’d be weird. billie finished her lunch and went back up to her room to decide what to wear. as she opened her wardrobe, something caught her eye. a top she had worn from a concert she did in dublin, with marilyn monroe’s face as a pattern on it. she knew she’d wear it, but she had to find a swimsuit to wear first. she rifled through a drawer until she found a simple black one, nothing too special but nothing too drab either. she took off the pyjamas she was already wearing and stuck the swimsuit on. after that, she put on the top and paired it with some black shorts, nearly replicating the previous concert outfit.

five o’clock came quicker than billie thought, and soon after that she was on the way to your place. although you both lived in LA, you were pretty far from eachother. so billie decided to be safe rather than sorry & left early. when she got to the door, she hesitated to knock. your place was so big & modern that she was slightly intimidated by it. but after a minute of careful consideration, she knocked. you answered the door in seconds, dressed in a short dress. billie’s heart skipped a beat as you led her inside. she followed you to the kitchen, where she smelled the familiar aroma of her favourite noodle soup.

“i followed the recipe from your insta highlight,” you said, “so i hope it’s alright. i’m sure you make it better than i do.” billie thanked you for the meal as you both sat down at the table and began to eat. you talked about a lot of things… the grammys, the media, upcoming tours, etc. billie found herself falling more and more in love as the conversation went on. about 20 minutes later, billie finished her noodles at the same time you did, and again thanked you for it. you smiled and said it was no bother. “how do you fancy getting in the pool now?” you asked. “that sounds really good,” billie smiled, “i’ve got my swimsuit on under this, actually.” your smile lit up even further as you replied “i do too!”

you both got out of your clothes and hopped into the pool. “its so warm.” billie remarked. “yeah, i have heaters in it.” you said smiling. billie looked you up and down, in awe of your swimsuit that made you look like a goddess. you swam around together for a while before you left the pool, saying you’d be back in a minute. “ok, see ya in a minute.” billie replied, wondering what you were doing. billie was surprised when you came back with two wine glasses, and a bottle of a really expensive red wine. “wow,” billie said, “is this for us?” “well, who else would it be for?” you laughed. you poured the wine into the glasses, and handed billie one. she took a sip, and watched as you did the same. “it’s really good,” billie commented, “don’t think i’ve had this before.”

as the evening went on, you and billie drank more wine, and slowly got more tipsy. you smiled at billie as she told you about a song she was in the middle of recording, her face lighting up in excitement. “you’re so pretty.” you said abruptly without a warning. billie blushed. “so are you.” she responded, the alcohol making her more confident. “like- really pretty,” you went on, “super pretty.” billie didn’t know how to respond. being complimented by the woman she had a massive crush on? she was blushing like mad. “i could- i could just kiss you.” you said, a smirk on your face. billie didn’t respond as a shocked expression took over her face. you waited a few seconds before leaning in and kissing her. billie kissed back immediately, setting her glass on the side of the pool. you kissed her passionately, and she did the same. you continued like that for a while, until you were making out with eachother.

“wow.” was all billie said. “you’re a good kisser.” you remarked, a hand still on billie’s cheek. “i- i really liked that. like, really liked that.” billie confessed. “me too.” you smirked, before leaning in to kiss her again.

[josephquinnswhore]

Hi! I'm not sure if you're taking requests but i wanted to ask if you could write one with Pedro where they're dating but reader is not famous, she is actually a young artist that runs a small business on Instagram. And everyone is shocked that he's with her, but he is so proud of being her boyfriend and is VERY supportive of her both in private and in public. That's, thank you 😊💕

the actor and the artist - pedro pascal x artist! female reader

Summary: you’re hosting your first ever art show and the paparazzi make you wonder if you’re good enough.

Word Count: 1.4K

Content Warning: age gap relationship, insecure reader.

Note: I fking love this request @rosaliedepp *kisses your forehead* I hope you love it. 🫶🏼💜

You remember where you first started, selling your artwork on Etsy, your prices were so cheap they undermined the hours of hard work, pain, sweat and tears that went into them, still you only managed to sell 3 works in about 12 months, you were stumped. Feeling like you should just give up, like it was a lost cause and your art wasn’t really as good as you originally thought it was. Until it happened.

You thought it was a scam at first, these scammers were getting crafty these days and the Pedro Pascal, messaging you on Etsy wanting a custom piece? Come on, didn’t seem likely and you weren’t stupid. You remember asking him to DM you on Instagram, his offical page, giving the email your username on Insta and within minutes receiving a direct message from the Pedro Pascal’s offical Instagram page that at the time, had 2.4 million followers, the white tick surrounded by the blue circle was confirmation it was really him and not some bot, or scammer.

He had been generous in his compliments on your works, even suggested making a business Instagram account to gain more traction, within the hour of messaging he had placed an order and left a very generous tip, he had even followed you and kept in contact regularly upon the arrival of his artwork, you figured it was because he didn’t trust you after he had sent that much money.

It was the opposite of what you thought that kept him talking with you, he thought you were sweet, talented and had real potential and knew he could help you where you needed it; not lacking in talent but recognition. If people actually saw your artwork, people would buy them. And they did, once they saw that Pedro had uploaded an image of your artwork in his house, that he followed you, your page blew up overnight, and you had Pedro to thank for it.

Which leads you to the present, two years later and 12 months of you two officially being a couple, even though things were fairly ‘new’ for the two of you, people had suspected things had been going on for longer. People of course had said their two cents online and you opted to ignore it.

Here you were in the cold evening of New York City, in a gallery room that was cleared just for your artwork, which would be showcased then auctioned, you had heard some big names were invited, ones in which you were terrified to see, let alone meet.

“You doing okay sweetheart?” Pedro’s voice scared you, pulling you back to reality as the room was half filled with people, something you’d failed to notice in your dissociative state. You offer him a smile as he hands you a glass filled with champagne.

“A bit nervous, hoping this will help.” You take a sip, your red lipstick that matches your ruby red silk, spaghetti strap dress, smears on the rim of the glass, you clutch your purse as a last resort for stress relief, feeling the tension build as more people arrive.

“I’m shitting myself, what if they don’t sell, what if they don’t like it? What if they don’t like me?” Your rambling makes Pedro chuckle, he steps towards you, his matching burgundy suit presses against your dress clad skin. His free hand caresses your hand and your hair tickles his fingers as you lean into him.

“They’ll be stupid not to love you, or your artwork. You’ve got this sweetheart.” You look at the genuine look on his face and can’t help but fall in love all over again, this man was truly a blessing in your life.

“You’re right, I’m powerful and wonderful and a fucking great artist. To us baby.” You clink your glasses together before throwing your head back, swallowing the liquid for courage before walking to the stage that had a microphone and your most iconic artwork on the wall behind you.

You’re standing in front of dozens of well known celebrities, but the champagne gives you the courage to smile at them as they watch you with wondering eyes. “Thank you all so much for joint us this evening. It’s truly an honour to host this event and to have you all here. Just a reminder that 35% of all purchases goes to the highest sellers choice of charity.”

The group cheer as you welcome them, pleased by your selflessness to give away money to donate to charity, Pedro is standing by himself off to the left of the stage and you give him a sweet smile.

“I wouldn’t be here without my biggest supporter, he’s changed my life for the better. This is the biggest moment of my life and thank you all for joining me along on this journey. The auction begins in 15 minutes so please don’t go anywhere. Stay and enjoy as long as you like, have a wonderful evening everyone.”

The applause goes straight to your head, people clapping and cheering for you as you walk off the stage, meeting Pedro at his side and giving him a kiss on the cheek, he doesn’t mind that you leave a lip shaped lipstick stain on his skin.

The auction is intense, your latest piece was the biggest success, it was sold for $360,000. That to you, was insane, you had earned that much money on one artwork. The years of hardworking was finally coming to pay off, not to mention one charity of a buyers choice was going to have received a very hefty donation.

“I can’t fucking believe it, that was insane. Thank you so much for coming with me, I couldn’t have done it without you.” You muse as you’re locking up the store, Pedro blushes at your compliment. “You did this all yourself sweetheart, money can’t buy talent.”

You shiver as the cold air hits your bare shoulders, the skin forming goosebumps immediately, your teeth are chatting at the freezing temperatures, curing yourself for not bringing a jacket. Pedro takes off his suit jacket, leaving him in his long sleeve-white button up dress shirt as he wraps the jacket around you, the smell and warmth of him bring you back to reality. The warmth holds you in its grasp.

“You didn’t have to do that, thank you.” You look up at him, thankful for the kind gesture. “Of course I did sweetheart, let’s get you home.” The perfect moment between you was spoiled as you see and hear paparazzi come swarming and shouting in your direction, probably after seeing the event posted online.

“Hey Pedro Pascal! What’s it like dating someone not talented on your level? Is it because you want a normal life?” The man snaps pictures of you and Pedro together, holding hands and Pedro shielding you from the cameras as the flash is blinding you.

“She is more talented than me. She’s an incredible artist, not that I have to justify it. Please leave us alone we’re very tired.” Pedro takes your hand and you try to walk away to get to his car which was parked right outside of the gallery, was it a good idea, no. Was it convenient, yes.

“What’s it like dating someone significantly younger, do you think she’s dating you for the money?” Pedro opens your door and puts your seatbelt on for you, before shutting the door and turning to the men following him.

“She’s the most genuine person I’ve ever met, not that it’s any of your business. Goodnight.”

He turns and makes his way to the car, starting it and driving off away from the flashes that blinded his eyes only moments ago. He notices you’re quiet, too quiet.

“Are you okay?” He seemed to be asking that a lot lately.

“I don’t know. They’re just mean, I love you Pedro, I do. I just don’t know how you deal with that- it’s so invasive and just horrible the things they’re saying about me, about us.”

His hand rubs your bare knee as he drives, his eyes not leaving the road until he comes to a red light mere streets from your shared apartment, “don’t listen to a word they say. They’re just looking for a reaction. If you’re happy then we’re good. I know I’m the happiest I’ve ever been with you.”

“You always know the right things to say Pedro.”

“I gotta keep my girl happy, don’t I?” You can’t help but smile at the comment, he truly was a blessing.

[fullofgutsndopamine]

Feeling Indigo (how ‘bout you?)

tw: cursing, (fake) blood, scenes from a haunted house, insta love

blood covered the walls, handprints dance up and down the walls without uniform, some scrape the wall as if it was dragged.

and after two weeks of working until four in the morning, chasing the sun up and watching the moon dance up slowly, slowly, slowly up the horizon-you we’re proud of it. thought it almost looked realistic-if you titled your head just right.

if it weren’t for the thick clumps that hung in the middle, giving away the corn syrup, with the dark red lighting it almost would’ve passed for real blood- or at least you’d tell yourself that.

look, you weren’t expecting much but your club out it together, trying to raise money for new equipment you all so desperately needed. so far it’s been a lot of middle schoolers-happily paying the $3 admission fee (mostly in spare change) and coming out genuinely scared-people in your grade have been leaving with the rolls and huffs about how you could’ve at least tried to make it scary-

“Hasan,” someone in a small group huffs, “It’s by the college, how scary could it be?”

he’s tall, all elbows and sharp edges, but he’s trying desperately to make himself smaller, clinging to the shirt of the guy in front of him like a lost child.

his voice is low when he speaks, all gravel, like he doesn’t want you to hear; “i’m not fuckin’ scared, dude. I just think haunted houses are fuckin’ stupid.”

his eyes snap to you when you go to tear his ticket, his hands practically shaking when you take it: “watch out, a group of third graders just made it through.”

you’re teasing, your voice is light but instead of looking relieved, he looks more stressed.

“that’s arguably even fuckin’ worse, dude.”

you snort before you can help yourself: “Speak to it. how is that somehow more horrible?”

he looks over his shoulder like it’s a secret before coming in close to you. you can practically feel his lips against your ears, his hot breath-

“Because kids fuckin’ suck,” he says, like it’s the most obvious thing in the world, “And their single job is to torment me-“

“is it hard always being the victim?”

“or,” Hasan doesn’t miss a beat, ignoring your comment, “Lurking in corners to laugh!”

You snort.

“Three dollars,” you hold your hand out, “I feel bad charging you, like kicking a puppy.”

“So does that mean it’s free?”

his smirk is almost blinding.

“Nah,” You shake your head, remembering the supplies that’s needed, “If anything, you should owe me double-“

“Look,” Hasan huffs, one hand digging in his pocket as his friends roll their eyes and crane their neck every time a yell is heard from inside, “If you think you’re so brave, you come in with me too.”

“Is this your shitty way of asking me out?”

He snorts, his head practically falls back.

“You wish,” acting like you don’t see how bright pink his face is and how his friends elbow one another. “Just trying to get you to admit you aren’t as brave as you’re acting. A real killer could be hiding-"

One of his friends, you think his name is Anthony, opens his mouth: "Uh, Hasan-"

And you don't want Anthony to blow your cover, so immediately, you're talking to shut him up.

"Fine. I'll go," You nod, "But If I don't scream, you pay us $40."

"And if you get scared?"

You snort, "I'll give you $40?"

He smirks, bites back the part that wants to offer a date- "Sure."

"Deal."

He offers his hand and you roll your eyes, but obey, meeting his hand to shake it mid-air.

The door to the room creaks open (thanks to you) and William, the art major, who's make up only looks good in the dark, "Welcome. The doctor will see you now."

William practiced that line for days, you walked into the room and he'd be cross legged in front of a mirror propped up against the wall, and you walked in on it many times, him trying new voices out-louder and deeper, trying to get his voice as low as possible.

You turn to Hasan, about to make a joke but he actually looks scared, is still trying to make himself smaller.

"Come on."

And before you can stop yourself, your lacing your fingers into his, and pulling him in.

The first room is a hospital and while it's not the best-you'd admit it, you can still be proud of it.

Annie, the political science major from across your hall, stays strapped in a bed, screaming bloody murder, the make up runs down her face and stains the outfit she wears-if hasan got closer, he'd see how shitty the make up looks.

You look at him, ready for him to finally be laughing, or rolling his eyes, but he's still half behind you

it's hard to hear you. Hasan has to strain, has to hunch his shoulders and offer his ear for you to be heard, and you can still feel his hand shaking in yours.

"That's just Annie," You finally say, knowing you'll win this bet, "She's a poly sci major."

He still doesn't seem sure as you lead into the next room, someone facing the wall, another pacing-

Before you can warn him, Scott comes behind him: "Come play with us."

Hasan lets out a scream that makes you almost feel bad, his friends long gone. It's a smaller haunted house-three rooms, and you're almost there, almost about to warn him-

look, you set this up but it doesn't mean your friends aren't dicks.

you turn around and your face to face with a clown, white make up on their face, lipstick smeared all over-

if you had been prepared for it, it wouldn't have been scary, but he got you last second-and the scream ripped through you.

"Fucker." You fight the urge to chase after him, don't want to give it away yet that this is your baby, your masterplan-especially since you ended up screaming-

"Well."

His smirk says it all as you're greeted by sunlight finally.

"I don't want to hear it."

He continues anyways.

“So, i guess i win.”

you roll your eyes, “You screamed the entire time, that hardly feels like winning-“

“So, $40?”

You make the move for your wallet, biting your lip to refrain from telling him this is your entire money for the next two weeks when his hand is over yours-

“Let me take you out,” he says instead, “Loser buys the other a coffee, yeah?”

your heart beats in your ears.

“I don’t drink coffee.”

“Jesus christ, dude.” he laughs, “are you always this difficult? fine. Buys a beer? or a tea?”

“hmm-“

“Let me take you out.”

and he says it so low, like he’s embarrassed that he went through all that for this, but he’s squirming in his spot, cranning his neck.

“Fine. The nest, 6pm. don’t be late.”

and you turn on your heels before he can realize how red your face is or how excited you are.

[dear-space-cadet]

YOU MET DARIO?!?

or should i say DARIO MET U?!??!

I DID!!!!! He was so incredibly kind and sweet!!!!!!! I knew he was going to be but I was a little worried he wasn’t going to like me. I think he did

I got to give him the friendship bracelets I made for him too! I think he was a little caught off guard bc I think when you’re a role player you’re so used to signing things for people and no one rly appreciating you. Like this random kiddo next to me (FULL ON NUGGETS FAN, LITERALLY WEARING A JOKIC JERSEY MIND YOU) literally asked who he was. I told said kiddo that Dario was a very good nba player and he should stan 😭😭😭

Anyway I think Dario was caught off guard that I was giving him something and not expecting anything in return. He was so sweet

Also I am convinced he’s the same type of neurodivergent I am bc I’m really shy but like the way we communicated was so similar to how I talk w my nd friends. Like he didn’t just take the bracelets and walk away, he like held them in his hand and let me pick them up and explain them. Like he trusted me to touch his hands without asking. Idk. I’m probably overthinking it but I just found that specific detail so sweet. This is why I’m a poet

And he was smiling sooooo big the whole time dude he was genuinely so nice and I think he was just really happy to know he still had someone rooting for him in particular. Like that someone was at the game specifically for him

Also I told him I had the jersey made that day at the NBA store and he laughed 😭😭 he was so fcking sweet

Idk if he recognized me. I’ve been thinking about DMing on insta to let him know it was meeee (we have DMed before but it’s all been on my spam insta since that’s where I’m in the gc with him; it’s private and the pfp isn’t my face) but idk if that’s crossing a line. I don’t think it is but I am rly cautious about being parasocial or creepy, and I don’t want to scare him either

(He had his best performance of the season thus far that night and that means something TO ME)

They often say never meet your blorbos but I met mine and he was awesome. He is a sweetheart. Love that guy even more now

[nattinatalia]

Jack Harlow x Reader : ME OR HER PT 3

Read part 1, Insta AU, pt2, Insta AU2

* featuring once again the @hoodharlow and major thanks to my baby Ree @heavyhitterheaux for the help, appreciate it mamas, she also makes an appearance in here.

It’s been days, even weeks that Y/N had reached out to Jack and till this day he hasn’t replied to her. In which she’s deeply hurt about, it’s so weird to her that he can be under her comments but he can’t talk to her privately.

It’s now the day of the festival in which they both will be performing and Jack is scared to run into her. But knowing his luck, that is more likely to happen.

“Jack, seriously? The day I met you, you were heartbroken and said you missed someone. So when I found out that someone was Y/N, I was more than happy to be working for you and get you both to reunite. I made that opening and you’ve been acting like a pendejo.” His manager Blanca says, glaring at him.

“I didn’t ask you to do that though.” Jack tells her.

“Este guero no entiende nada.” She says to Urban and Clay.

“Do whatever you want man, this stress isn’t good for the baby.” Blanca says rubbing her bump and leaves him there alone to go work on something before he has to go on stage.

“Are you really not going to talk to her at all? For someone who claims you still love her, you’re doing a shitty job at getting her back.” Urban tells him.

“Like come on, I can see the box in your pocket. Who carries that if you don’t plan on trying to fix things with her.” Jack’s brother Clay adds.

“Why is everyone so bothered whether I talk to her or not?”

“Because the moment she left you’ve only been depressed and whining on how much you miss her, And how you would do things differently.” Clay says. “But we can’t tell you what to do” He shrugs and grabs his phone and puts it in his pocket.

“We’ll meet you before you go on.” Urban tells him.

“Where are you guys going?”

Clay and Urban give each other a look but go on and answer him “We’re going to see Y/N perform and hangout a bit.” Clay answers him.

That answer has Jack sitting up “What? Since when are you two close with her.?”

Urban shrugs, “She reached out to all of us that day we all found her Instagram account.”

“So now you’re all friends with her.?” He’s clearly getting annoyed now.

“Dude, she was our friend too. When she left she cut all ties with us as well and we’ve missed her, so don’t get mad at us for doing what you’re too scared to do.” His best friend tells him.

Jack nods, “Just give me time.”

Clay shrugs “Get all the time you need, but don’t cry to mom when it’s too late and she finds someone else.” with that Clay and Urban leave Jack standing there alone with his thoughts.

******

“Ree I’m telling you, he doesn’t want to talk to me, why would I reach out to him again?.” You ask your best friend.

“Because babes, you’ve always been the one to fix things first. Every little argument y’all had, you would be the mature one.”

You shrug “Maybe I don’t want to be the mature one this time?”

Ree smiles and raises her eyebrows and looks at you “The same person who still wears the Necklace he bought you?. The same person who after two years, you still have as your home screen.? Or the fact that you kept in touch with his mom all these years or the fact that you bought a house in his hometown.? Someone who doesn’t want to fix things, wouldn’t have done all that.”

You groan “I hate when you’re right.”

“As your best friend, it’s my job to call you out on your bullshit.”

You smile “The only one actually.”

Ree smiles, “No lies were told. Now shake some ass, do your thing and show him what he’s been missing and if he doesn’t come looking for you, you go and set his ass straight and maybe go down on him.”

You both laugh at that.

“Share the joke with the crowd.” A voice says coming into the dressing room.

You both turn to look who it is and you both smile.

“My baby is here.” Your best friend says excited and runs to her man.

“Hi mamas, miss your tiny self.”

“You’re not calling me tiny when we do all those moves in bed and hotel bathrooms.”

Urban chuckles “My fun sized baby.”

“Damn Urb, you can handle all that?” Clay asks

Ree smiles “He sure can, and he does a perfect job at it.”

You roll your eyes playfully “Okay horn dogs, be respectful with the single ones.”

“You’re single because Jack and you are so stubborn.”

“Clayborn, you’re supposed to be on my side.” You tell him with a pout.

“I’ll be in your corner when you and my brother fix things.” He goes up to you and hugs you. “Plus if by the night my mom doesn’t get a word that you too are good, she says she’ll find both of you and lock you in a room until y’all fix your shit.”

You smile at that, “Mama Maggie has always had my back since day one”

“Yes, now come on, it's time for you to kill it.”

*********

After your performance you make it your mission to go look for Jack. You thought you had seen him in the crowd where families and friends of the performers would have a safe and secluded area. But when you did a double take, he wasn’t there. So that just killed your mood, but once you were done, Ree confirmed that you weren’t imagining stuff, he indeed was watching and was smiling the whole time.

So Clay and Urban directed you to his backstage area. You were power walking through halls and halls until you made it outside of his dressing room.

“Te ves como una mujer que tiene una misión que cumplir.”

You smile, “Blanca, siempre un placer en verte.” You go to hug her.

“Please tell me you’re here to work shit out with that stubborn man?”

“Hopefully yeah, I know he’s been giving you shit about this topic. So I appreciate you being understanding and patient with him.”

She shrugs. “It’s my job to have him on check but also in such a short period of time he’s become a good friend, so I just want both my friends to be happy.”

I nod, “I make no promises.”

“Go in there then, he doesn’t have to perform until last so you have time.” And with that she walks away.

You take a deep breath and knock on the door “come in.”

You walk in and your eyes automatically go to search where he’s at and find him sitting down on a couch, doing something with his phone.

“Hi.” You say to break him out from what he’s doing.

He looks up and it’s shocked to see you “Y/N!”

You smile “I saw you out there watching my set.”

He nods “Yeah.” He stands up so you take that as an opening and head closer to him.

“Why didn’t you stay to say hi or something?”

He shrugs “Didn’t think there was anything to talk about.”

“Ouch.” You look down at your hands, then up at him. “I deserve that I guess.”

“I mean yeah, you do.”

“Can we talk?”

He shrugs, “About what? The last time we talked, you said lots of things and made a choice for the both of us.”

“I know, But please let me explain.”

“I have to get ready to perform, so maybe some other time.” He walks towards the door but you’re faster so now you’re blocking his way.

“Y/N, please step aside.”

You shake your head. “No, please just tell me at least why you hate me so much? I know I walked away but it was hard on me as well.”

He just stays quiet, looking at you and you notice he’s trying to bail.

“I’m not leaving until we get to talk, after tonight if you don’t want anything to do with me I’ll disappear.”

“Yeah, you’re perfect at that.”

You nod, “Again, I deserve that but please let's talk.”

“You left, you left me all those years ago and you didn’t even look back. You didn’t think about anyone else but you. Then you pop up like nothing? Like everything is supposed to fall back like how it used to? No Y/N, you hurt me. You left me. We had plans and you chose to leave.”

“I know and I regretted it the moment I did. But come on Jackman she was your manager, I was just the girl warming up your bed. You weren’t about to set her straight or let her go.”

He glares at you. “You were more than a warm body and you know that. We were leaving that night, I wasn’t going to decide on anything. But yeah maybe you’re right. I wouldn’t have set her straight there because she was part of my contract. But you took the easy way out.”

“The easy way out? You think it was easy walking away from you?.” You shake your head. “Jack, walking away from you was harder than it looked. It broke me too, but I left for you.”

He chuckles “How is leaving doing it for me?”

“Because I knew she was your manager and you had to work with her. I also know you hate confrontation and having to choose between people you care about. She was making rude comments towards me, since the very first time she saw me with you. I left because I knew you would had to make a choice eventually and I wasn’t going to make you do that. I left because I knew you were meant for greatness and I wasn’t going to stop you from living your dreams.”

“Did you have to block me from all of your social media? I even asked your friends and they wouldn’t say anything to me about you. I didn’t know if you made it with your music because you changed your name. Then you pop up like nothing, like I’m supposed to drop everything and be okay that you left me?”

You shake your head, “No, but at least we'd have closure of everything that happened. Leaving you wasn’t easy, I regretted the moment those words left my mouth. But we both had to focus on our careers. I will never regret that, putting your career above my feelings. You deserve every success you’ve had.”

You look at him and notice he’s not even paying attention to you or looking at you, he's looking down at his hands. “Are you even listening to me? I’m trying to explain myself. To let you know why.”

He nods. “Part of me understands why you decided on leaving. But part of me is hurt that you did.”

“You have no idea how many times I wanted to come searching for you. To tell you I was sorry, but Neelam was being disrespectful towards me and was making you pick between Me or her. I’m not a child, I wasn’t going to make you decide between us.”

You stare at him and see him looking down to his hands again. “You’re honestly not even listening to me again. What has you so distracted?.”

He doesn’t answer you or even bothers to look at you.

“I tried, I guess I’ll leave you to it then.” You turn around and open the door, but he stops you and slams the door shut. “Jack what the hell?.”

“I’m hurt. You hurt me by leaving me and by the choice you made. But what hurt me the most was not waking up to you, not seeing your smile or those little silly fights we would have over what to eat for dinner. We had plans, I had plans that night, and they went to shit the moment I made it backstage.”

He pulls out something from his left pocket. “This was meant to be yours. I was going to propose that night, I had everything planned but you left.”

You freeze at his confession. “W-What? Jack?”

He smiles, “I told you on our second date that I knew you were going to be the woman I would want to spend my life with. Maybe I’m an idiot but I can’t see myself giving it to anybody else.”

“What are you saying right now?”

“Even though you hurt me by leaving, I wouldn’t be able to forgive myself if I let you walk away from us, from me again.”

“I’m so confused right now, my emotions are all over the place and I don’t know if I’m understanding what you’re saying, so please clarify what you’re saying.”

“I’m saying that if you're willing, we can start all over again and I promise to never put you second to anyone or anything else ever again. But you have to promise me that when things get tough you won’t run and hide. We’ll work on things together.”

You nod, “I promise.”

He pulls you in. “It’s going to take some time but I’m sure we’ll get to where we once were.”

“I’ll never stop saying how sorry I am that I left you.”

“Y/N, I think I somewhat understand why, but I don’t have to like the decision you made. Enough of that though. We lost so many years, it’s time we catch up.”

You nod, smiling “I missed you so much.” You say and go to hug him.

After a while you two make it back to the couch to sit down and just talk about everything and anything. You share some kisses here and there and it just reminded you how much you really do love this man.

Jack asks you about your music, you tell him that you watched everything he’s accomplished from afar.

“Please tell me you two are fucking or at least in one piece.”

You both look towards the door and see Urban popping his head inside. “Oh, I’m guessing everything went well then?”

You nod “We’re okay.”

“FINALLY!!!!.”

“I’m happy you two solved your issues, but Jack you’re needed real quick. I’m sorry.” Blanca says.

“Oh, no problem, I actually have to go change and get my things. I rushed over here after my performance.” You say getting up from the couch.

Jack follows. “Don’t leave, wait for me?”

“I’m not leaving without you bubs.” You tell him and go to peck his lips. “But I do need to go and check up with my team. I’ll come looking for you.”

He nods “I’ll see you in a bit.”

You walk out the room with your best friend Ree, leaving Jack with Urban, Clay and Blanca.

“I need you guys to help me with something” Jack tells them.

“Ahora con que?” Blanca asks.

“I let her walk away once. I’m not letting that happen again. So here’s the plan.”

Jack shares the plan with them and they’re all excited about what’s about to happen in less than twenty four hours.

He was being serious when he said he couldn’t see himself with anybody else.

He missed you.

He still loved you despite everything.

He still had the ring that was supposed to be yours that night everything went wrong.

He had a plan, and he was going to make it happen.

He just hopes you’ll say yes.

**************

TAG LIST

@heavyhitterheaux

@harlowsbby

@arination99

@cmalass

@jackharloww

@minkookie95

@deannaard

@jacksmoviestar

@harlowcomehome

@fdl305

@httpkoylinnn

@xoxokiaraaxoxo

@hoodharlow

@automaticpeachsong

@amethyst09

@aliciacat20

@allyson15

@gabbylovesreading

[daily-crowley]

TELL ME ABT YOUR OTHER HYPERFIXATIONS!! Mine are currently Loki, ofmd, good omens, and Hozier :D

THANK YOU FOR ASKING, THIS IS GOING TO BE LONG!

There’s a few hyperfixations of mine I’m always talking about but right now there’s 3 main ones.

1. The Boys

2. Invincible

3. Peacemaker

The Boys is the main one; I loved it since it came out back in 2019. I moved on sometime after S3 ended and I found another hyperfixation but now new content is coming out with S4 so I’m back on my The Boys bullshit. I’m a Butchlander shipper, BILLY BUTCHER AND HOMELANDER CONSUME MY THOUGHTS. I AM BEYOND OBSESSED WITH THOSE TWO! I need them to kiss…. And-and more. Anthony Starr and Karl Urban are my current celebrity crushes that I’m only able to think about. If you follow me in insta it’s just been The Boys 24/7 that I’ve talked about since new content started dropping thanks to S4. HOMELANDER IS MY BABYGIRL I WILL DEFEND HIM I DON’T CARE FOR HIS CRIMES I DON’T CARE IF I’M SUPPOSE TO HATE HIM, I LOVE HIM. BILLY BUTCHER MY GOTH BOYFRIEND I WILL DIE IF YOU DIE. HE CANT DIE, HE JUST CAN’T. S4 teaser was insane, so much was going on, Black Noir is back?! And Jeffrey Dean Morgan is joining the cast! AND TEAMING UP WITH BUTCHER?! They said that trailer was just a scratch on the surface of what happens, wasn’t even a trailer just a teaser but it had so much going on WHAT DO YOU MEAN THAT’T JUST A SMALL TASTE OF S4?! I’m scared but excited. I’m nervous but excited (Billy if you fucking die on me- that’s what I’m most worried about)

Invincible is my other current hyperfixation, S1 was so good and I can’t wait for S2 to continue. They should’ve dropped all the episodes at once that way I don’t have to wait but whatever. Vigilante is my little meow meow from Peacemaker. I love Adrian so much, hate that I gotta wait till like 2025-2026 for S2 possibly.

My other interests that I talk about all the time (not currently much though thanks to The Boys) are:

• NATM/JedTavius

• Venom/SymBrock

• SamBucky/Marvel in general

• FNAF

• Who Framed Roger Rabbit

• Maleficent

• The Simpsons

Night at The Museum came out when I was 7, I’m 24 now, I haven’t moved on. It was my first hyperfixation and ship before I even knew what that all meant. I’ve written like 30 JedTavius fics. I’m a Venom fan first and a Spider-Man hater second. I will defend Venom at all times and Eddie and him are definitely in love. When the FNAF film came out it brought me back to my FNAF phase, Foxy’s my favourite with Bonnie being second. I watched the film about 20 times. Then in November I started a personal rewatch challenge on Insta where I watched it all month long. Meaning I’ve probably watched it at least 50 times and I still haven’t gotten sick of it (also I love the Josh Hutcherson whistle meme. I don’t care how much people hate it I think it’s funny.) I’m a huge Marvel fan, I literally grew up with the comics, I’m not kidding those were read to me as my bedtime stories. My favourite characters are Sam Wilson and Bucky Barnes as a result I ship them. I never shipped Stucky, that never made sense to me whilst Sam and Bucky have so much chemistry. Sam Wilson is everything to me, I adore SamCap he’s MY Captain America (still love Steve though!) Roger Rabbit is my favourite fictional character of all time, my biggest comfort character. Growing up I really tried to base my personality off of him, the world might be obsessed with Jessica Rabbit but I’m obsessed with Roger. People need to draw, edit, and cosplay him as much as they do Jessica. I’ve been a huge Simpsons fan since I was like 10 and my mother dropped me off at my aunts house and she left leaving me alone with my cousin who was watching The Simpsons and it took off from there. Nelson Muntz is my funky little son and they need to make Nelisa canon. Maleficent is my favourite Disney character (actually like quite a bit of Disney, second favourite character being Donald Duck) I based a lot of my style around her, and I have a lot of Maleficent collectibles. I absolutely love the Angelina Jolie’s Maleficent films (totally ship her with Diaval).

There’s a few other things that I really, really love. I’m also a huge horror fan my favourite being Chucky/Child’s Play as well as Killer Klowns from Outer Space, The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (not 3D), Friday the 13th, Nightmare on Elm Street, etc. Sanrio, Kuromi is my favourite second is Pochacco, I really love animated films and cartoons. IT, Monster High, and more. I’m also a collector of all these things.

So there you have it. Those are all my hyperfixation and fandom’s that I’m in. Right now especially those first 3 that I talked about (seriously can you tell I really like The Boys? Lol)

[preciadosbass]

30/7/24 [draft from yesterday, again]

woke up at 9 and didn’t end up going back to sleep because my parents kept on talking about how i couldn’t as my provision/keyworker’s coming round. i know i usually get sleep, even if it’s in small amounts, but i never feel like i do. i scrolled through a few pictures of patrick stump until i had breakfast. i honestly felt so exhausted today following how my sleep and eating is at the moment.

my provision [person i have to see instead of going to school] came round almost immediately after i got up so i got dressed listening to escape the fate and then i obviously have to see her. i was about to say good morning to boris on the driveway when she pulled up so i ran off into the living room and waited for her to come in. i think she could tell that i was not having it today so we just awkwardly played uno for an hour. it’s hard to explain stuff like this without sounding ungrateful, i know it’s better than being at school, AND i know it makes me sound stupid, but i’m so scared of her. i really don’t like having to see her.

after she left i went outside and cuddled boris. he was literally the most affectionate id ever seen him in the four years we’ve had him. he usually just goes back and forth and brushes his head on me but today he wouldn’t leave me alone [in the best way.] i took a few videos of him rolling around on the floor and being playful because he’s just too cute. after being out with him for around 35 minutes i went back inside and finished watching tv from yesterday.

my dad came into my room at some point with something behind his back and i assumed it was some weird ass bug because he does tend to hand me stuff like that a lot. i didn’t believe that whatever it was wasn’t alive so i looked away and he put it behind my pillow and walked out. turned out it was a FALL OUT BOY CD!!! he got a deal on ebay and thought he might aswell get me something he knew i like. i love him so much.

after talking to my dad about fall out boy i went back to my room and carried on watching tv. while doing so i made another collage [shown at the end]. i’m not entirely happy with it but i knew it’d be a little iffy as i don’t have anything too interesting to stick into my book. i also didn’t have enough receipts/stickers [etc] to finish it anyways, but at least i liked making it.

i watched tv up until 4 when started collecting pictures of chris drew and other people like that to print out sometime, and then at some point i went upstairs to play roblox with my sister as we haven’t had one to one time in ages — or time together whatsoever for that matter. we played pierce the veil obby, natural disaster and fashion famous. it was really nostalgic playing roblox again.

my phone battery got low so i went back downstairs to the driveway and cuddled boris for like 30/40 minutes. mum came back from shopping so i had a couple grapes and watched a few videos on roller coaster crashes. after that i went on a walk with my mum to this abandoned well i haven’t been to since like 2018. [couple of pics also at end, the rest are at my insta @//iloveechicheng]

when i got home i looked for boris at his favourite spot [perched under my dads car] and when he wasn’t there i momentarily freaked out and as i looked up i noticed him on the windowsill looking out at me from the kitchen?? he’s literally never sat on a windowsill, at least not to my knowledge.. it was so cute OMGG

at this point it was about 9:30 so i stayed awake for as long as i could until i had a 20 minute nap and then went up to my parents to ask them questions about boris because they were still awake [1am i think]. we didn’t argue as we were all just so tired. afterwards i went downstairs intending to have another 20 minute nap but i woke up at 2 so i rushed to say goodnight to boris before i fell asleep again.

* ignore how weird the collage looks, i had to blur out most of the stuff on the receipts

have a good day/night -_<

[i-may-be-an-emu]

New intro post because I lost the old one and I should probably have one

Hello! I’m emu (nickname) and my pronouns are he/him. I’m ftm trans and aroace, mostly.

I might also like they/them as pronouns though I’m still figuring out how I feel about those, but by all means use them unless I say I don’t like them anymore. Whatever is in my bio should be fine :)

I don’t tell people my age :) and I very very rarely tell people what country I am from. I haven’t shared my name on here and am uncertain about wether I will or not. Don’t take it personally, it’s just for safety and my own peace of mind.

I’m a Christian! And yes I’m also queer. Please don’t be mean to me because of my religion.

I block people easily but also follow people easily! Don’t be scared to talk to me :)

I care about people a lot! (Hyper empathy yay! (/sarc))

I use “:)” and “<3” a LOT (not <3 if you don’t like that)

I use tone tags but not always, mainly just assume I’m not meaning things in a mean or romantic way and it’ll be alright.

I try to trigger warm posts as best I can and cw for bright colours, gifs ect.

I don’t swear but I reblog and might post images/clips that have swear words in them.

I have dyscalculia, audhd and anxiety and depression! I’m trans so I also am affected by dysphoria a lot! (I’m getting better with some of this stuff and am medicated most days for adhd.)

I think I have ocd but I’m not sure because I have a lot of overlapping disorders already that could be causing those symptoms. And also just so you know, my memory sucks.

I am EXTREMELY obsessed with shoot from the hip. EXTREMELY. (They’re @shootimpro on youtube, insta and tiktok- go check them out if you want!!!) this is almost a fan blog for them at this point. If you get annoyed by my almost constant posting about them feel free- nay encouraged, I don’t want to annoy people- to filter the tags:

#Sfth

#shoot from the hip

#shootimpro

#sfthposting

These are good tags for sfth fans to filter within my blog if you want sfth posts, too :)

If you’re a sfth fan but not a patreon just know that I sometimes talk about patreon things here (its not against the rules to talk about) and if you don’t want to see sfth patreon content talked about or screenshots of things because of whatever reason then you can filter the tag #sfth patreon things

and if you’re a sfth fan and you want to know more about them or you need screenshots or clips feel free to ask!!!!!! I’m always happy to talk about them and I have over 500 screenshots and more I can easily access through discord.

if you are a sfth fan and want to be on the fan discord just ask and I can dm you the join link! :))

I’ve had other hyperfixations that may resurface from time to time such as the shows Community, Loki, f.r.i.e.n.d.s and B99. I also have been obsessed with Spider-Man and marvel in general.

I might tag things as #emu rambles if I’m randomly rambling in the tags or #self rb if I’ve reblogged something from myself, these tags don’t really mean anything and idk why I do it :)

(oh yeah and barely anything here is organised)

I probably missed something but who knows.

:)

[5ivebyfive]

I hate peoole I hate people I hate people.

An account I followed on insta about Smile 2/Skye Riley (which I followed for press content) seems to have just spoiled the ending of the movie. Just. What the fuck is wrong with people? I’m furious. And my emotional state has not been well and I want to scream and cry. This is legitimately the ONLY thing that has kept me going. The official release is the 18th. This was posted before most people even get a chance to see it.

I want to google and see if it’s true or not so I can still enjoy the movie, but I’m scared I’d still end up spoiling myself.

I’m not okay. Not at all.

And I won’t say what the post said so no one else has to be spoiled.

(But if you know the ending talk to me and tell me this is a weird joke.)

[wildlife4life]

No but like writers and buddie stans respectfully don’t want it a cheating arc for the wedding episode vrs the writers giving Eddie a cheating arc also they are doing vertigo and Tim talks about it so what I got from that is Shannon/ Kim works as a way for Eddie to break up with Marisol which like the hey could of done it easily but they want to give more trauma to pour Eddie and I feel like they gonna pull out a bones and show that actually Kim doesn’t look like Shannon and is all in eddies head also apparently Buck meets her and is like you don’t look like Shannon so if that happens prove is only on eddies head also I don’t think Eddie could like fully if the Buck seeing Kim is true I don’t think Eddie fully would say I went out with her when you think I was out with my girlfriend he would be more like I don’t know why this girl I saw looked similar to Shannon and Buck like no she doesn’t I do think that maybe Kim Shannon vertigo vibes can make Eddie start questioning his sexuality you know I was actually happy that they cut the m and Eddie kiss from this episode cause I think we all cringed when we saw the stills and we were like we don’t need stills and I’m still mad they got for cheating but we all gotta know that Ryan Murphy has a thing for cheating I mean glee is the blue print of it all so and I mean even Buck cheated so but I did appreciate they didn’t made buddie kiss in the party I was scared for that and like Oliver is like he don’t want cliches with Buddie which makes me think they he doesn’t love Buck Tommy as much cause they are a cliche actually like the jealousy is such a cliche and he didn’t even understand his jealousy at all but is a cliche

Okay that was a lot anon. But I'm going to try to hit the major points.

I'm pretty sure that Kim/Shannon is not all in Eddie's head based on the interviews, but its still a really fun (yet sad) theory.

Vertigo (which I have never seen so I can't really say much on) seems to be a running theme with this cheating storyline. But god I hope it won't result in the death of Shannon again.

Tim does seem to love his cheating storylines. 4X's now in just 911 alone. Like damn.

And I agree that Buck did not understand his jealousy and imprinted his confused feelings onto Tommy. I can't say if Oliver likes the relationship or not, but he has yet to hype it up on insta... he's only done that with buddie. Hehehe.

Hope this was enough?

[lqfiles]

ANON WHO BROUGHT UP LUCAS THANK U I WAS ITCHING TO TALK AB HIM BUT I WAS SOOO SCARED BC i didn’t know if it was a safe space free of lumis or not…

my ig feels kinda curated to show me content of him there’s so much of his stans there compared to tiktok and the specific posts im getting is like “dreamies winning for smoothie!! …lucas in the back🥺💔” OR “dejun introducing lucas for his stage🥺🥺” SHUUTTT UPPPPP

it’s especially aggravating when there are situations in the industry that were far less impactful than his allegations the ones i’m thinking of specifically is soojin ex gidle as well as chuu have not promoted on music shows BUT WITHIN LIKE TWO MONTHS OF HIM COMING BACK HE GETS TO HAVE HIS SOLO DEBUT AND PERFORM??? and don’t even get me started on seunghan. what the fuck do you mean ot6 siren gtfo

i gave up on editing and was making shitposts on my tiktok praying for the downfall of sm ent because it seems they have a 7 member group curse DIEEE!!! (respectfully..! i lov u lee donghyuck i hope u can be free from the sm shackles in due time)

HSDJDKSKS don’t worry this is never a safe space for him and his fan i rlly do not like that guy and you’ll never catch me praising him.. anyways i got some stuff to say too but it will probably be the only time i’ll speak on it here because i don’t like giving that man attention 😶‍🌫️

bro i’m not surprised that you’re getting that stuff because when i tell you 99% of nctzens on insta are all lucas fans it actually shocked me 😭😭 i remember once commenting smth like “we don’t want him back” and i got sent death threats like OVER DOZEN???? MR CANT FIND THE BEAT?? 😭😭😭 tiktok is really 50/50 with a side that’s here for him and another side that doesn’t like him. the only platform i know where it’s mostly people disliking him is twitter but even then he got a pretty large following on there that is LOUD and ANNOYING

and you’re so right about that ITS SO CRAZY TO ME how SM just wouldn’t let go off him like they were so adamant on keeping him in the company for some reason and have been soft launching him for a good year trying to get the public to ease a bit, (the amount of concerts he’s attended to make his presence known.. you’re not slick SM) and i just don’t get what value he has to that company. he doesn’t bring the talent like he literally invented the term dozen because he dozen do anything right, he doesn’t bring the visuals, you can argue that he brings fans because he got a very huge SEA and latin (?) fan population that is veryyyy loud but even then the number of haters is much bigger, china literally hates him and korea barely tolerates him.

they didn’t hesitate to put seunghan on hiatus and are literally erasing him from the group in real time with the ot6 siren ver it’s crazyyy, all because he got his privacy invaded and did acceptable teen things? they kicked that SNSD member out for starting her own clothing brand and i’m sure they blacklisted her too, jaejoong got blacklisted too, soojin and chuu got kicked out, but the guy who has literal criminal allegations (that he basically admitted to himself) gets a whole pity sob documentary as well as rebranding as a soloist? chris lee is the biggest dick rider ever for this and it will never make sense to me😭

i honestly don’t like talking about him or mentioning him because 1. any type of publicity can be good publicity to him 2. arguing with his fans is useless and tiring because they will NOT change their mind 3. his face and existence annoys me so yeah i don’t like mentioning him because what’s the point hate-watching his content like that’s still publicity for him

but yeah if i find out any of his fans follow me i’ll literally block, even if you dont follow me and i find you’re his fan i block 💀 NOT A SAFE SPACE FOR LUMIS PLEASE LEAVE BEFORE I HAVE TO BLOCK U MYSELF 😭🙏🏽