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cuddlepilefics · 1 year ago

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Sleepy sickie + post-adrenaline puke

Fandom: P1Harmony

Sickie: Intak

Caregivers: hyung-line

@monthofsick

TW: emeto, fainting, real person fiction

No one’s POV.:

Comebacks were always rough but now that P1Harmony actually won on a show, the members were motivated to work even harder to get more wins under their belt. It didn’t matter how tired they were, the feeling of being cheered on by their fans made the exhaustion absolutely worth it. “What’s on your mind?”, Keeho asked softly, catching Intak’s attention. Furrowing his brows at the leader, Intak muttered: “You talking to me, hyung?” – “Who else would I be talking to? We’re the only two here”, Keeho retorted and the younger frantically looked around the room. He hadn’t noticed their friends leaving. Had he really been that spaced out? “So?”, the leader repeated, “What’s on your mind? You seem really deep in thought, especially if you didn’t even notice the others heading out.”

There was a moment of silence before Intak asked: “Can I be honest with you? There’s nothing on my mind. No thoughts, head empty. ‘m just so tired.” – “So you’ve been more or less asleep with your eyes open, huh?”, Keeho chuckled, passing the younger a bottle of water, “I get that. None of us has gotten nearly enough sleep lately. Try to stay hydrated and we’ll see if we can fit in a nap at any point of the day.” Obediently sipping half of the water, Intak closed his eyes and massaged his temples. He hadn’t been able to kick this headache for the past two days and it only seemed to be getting worse. Noticing his dongsaeng’s discomfort, Keeho hummed: “Headache?” The younger nodded and closed his eyes, resting his head in his hands. “Don’t worry, the others will bring back lunch when they return and I’m sure Taeyang will have some painkillers for you once you got something in your stomach”, the leader smiled, massaging Intak’s neck.

Grimacing, the boy slipped one hand under his shirt and weakly palmed at his middle. He wasn’t sure he even wanted to have something in his stomach. It had been a little unsettled for a while now but he knew how stress could lead to digestive problems, so he wasn’t too concerned. “Are you feeling okay?”, Taeyang asked as he placed the takeout bag onto the table. “Huh?”, Intak sleepily blinked up at the eldest, “Wha’?” – “I asked if you’re feeling okay”, Taeyang repeated, “You look pretty pale.” Sitting up, the rapper sighed: “Need sleep.” His words still came out a little slurred and he sluggishly scrubbed at his swollen eyes. “We all do”, Keeho muttered under his breath as he glanced at their maknaes tiredly piling onto a seat together.

After making sure their two youngest were eating, Jiung joined his hyungs in fussing over Intak. “Eat something”, Jiung hummed, placing a takeout box in front of the younger, “You’ll need the energy for the performance.” Though his appetite was almost non-existent but feeling pressured by his hyungs, he forced himself to eat, partly hoping he’d feel more alive once he had something in his system. Intak missed the hushed conversation between the two eldest but quietly thanked Taeyang when the older handed him a painkiller. Once the headache improved, he should be more functional.

That plan backfired badly and Intak found himself with a bad stomachache barely half an hour after his meal. He had already gotten his hair and makeup done, so he curled up on the couch and closed his eyes for a while. There was no way, he’d be able to take a nap though, the pain so intense he could barely breathe. His stomach groaned lowly, catching Jiung’s attention. “You good?”, the older whispered, heart breaking when the other shook his head. Releasing a slow breath, Intak mumbled: “The food isn’t settling at all.” – “No? What’s going on?”, Jiung worried, scooting over to feel his dongsaeng’s forehead, “You don’t have a fever, do you feel sick at all?” The younger slipped his hand under his shirt and rubbed his churning stomach, breathing: “It hurts like hell and I feel like I’m gonna puke.” – “Should we go to the bathroom?”, Jiung cooed, offering Intak a hand, “Come on, maybe you’ll feel better if you get it out.”

Intak panted as he bent over the toilet bowl, spitting into the undisturbed waters and watching the ripples. Standing behind his dongsaeng, Jiung rubbed the other’s back and winced when he felt his spine ripple. Intak’s eyes watered as he pitched forward with a harsh retch. Breaking into a strained coughing fit, the rapper hugged his middle tight as the pain increased tenfold. Intak sank into a crouch and heaved forcefully but couldn't bring anything up. Kneading the back of the rapper’s neck, Jiung offered: “Do you want me to get you some water? Might soothe your stomach or help you throw up.” – “Stay, please?”, Intak whimpered and shook his head, a fresh tear spilling down his pale cheek.

Jiung did stay, patiently rubbing Intak’s back as the younger heaved painfully. The rapper didn’t bring anything up though, only shredding his throat with unproductive retches as his stomach kept turning. Realizing that nothing would come from his attempts, Intak straightened back up and winced when his ears rang. With his vision darkening, he grabbed Jiung’s arms to steady himself, grateful when the older grabbed him to keep him from toppling over.

“You should have a couple of minutes to lay down and rest before we need to get on stage”, Jiung mused, walking Intak back to the couch, where the rapper promptly curled up, “Here, have some water first.” – “Hyung, I’m not sure that’s a good idea”, Intak moaned, palming his still upset stomach. He doubted it’d stay down. Turning to the younger, Keeho gasped in shock: “Woah, shit! What happened to your voice?!” Since the rapper looked so uncomfortable talking about it, Jiung replied softly: “Lunch wasn’t sitting so well and he’s feeling really sick to his stomach. He didn’t throw up yet but the dry heaves strained his throat badly.” – “You’re sick?”, Keeho frowned, feeling Intak’s forehead but he couldn’t detect a fever either. The younger didn’t reply, already knocked out.

“Poor kid”, Jiung whispered as he glanced at his sleeping dongsaeng, “He’s so exhausted, I think his body is lacking the energy to digest his meal. That might be why it's hurting him so much.” – “I’ll make sure he’ll be cleared from schedules for the remainder of the day”, Keeho promised, “Not sure I’ll be able to her him out of this performance though, since he didn’t throw up nor does he have a fever.” Jiung nodded grateful and went to find Taeyang to see if the older also had nausea medication, still praying his dongsaeng would have to perform. He couldn’t help beating himself up for saying that Intak hadn’t gotten sick yet. Though the rapper had tried so hard to be quiet, Jiung was sure at least some of the staff had heard him, so they could’ve easily lied but it was too late for that now.

Intak had a hard time waking up when Taeyang shook him just in time to quickly get his makeup retouched before having to go on stage. “You should drink a little more than that”, the eldest commented when Intak swallow the pill with only one tiny sip if water, “We wouldn’t want you passing out on stage.” – “No’ gonna pass ou’”, the rapper slurred, pushing the bottle away. Watching the interaction, Keeho wondered how the boy was going to rap his lines if he was too sleepy to pronounce such a simple sentence. Fighting down a sickly burp, Intak muttered under his breath: “More worried ‘bout pukin’ in front of everyone.” – “That’s not very reassuring”, Jiung chuckled sadly, also encouraging the other to have a few more sips.

They only had a few minutes left and Intak weakly slumped into Jiung’s side. “I cleared your schedule for the rest of the day, so you can catch up on some sleep soon. Your voice sounds wrecked, that’s why we’ll have you lipsync, just focus on dacing”, Keeho informed him quietly, “We’ll need you to stay awake a little longer though. Just get this performance over with and then you can rest.” The words barely made sense in Intak’s muddled brain but hearing their fans’ cheers already, the adrenaline woke him up just in time. Though he still felt incredibly shaky, he managed to put on a smile for their fans and forced his sore body to dance his heart out, temporarily forgetting the nausea licking at the back of his throat.

The members were stunned as they watched Intak dance. They wouldn’t have noticed him being unwell at all if they didn’t know. That was also why they startled when their friend crumpled, barely striking the ending pose before losing consciousness. With the camera focusing on their two maknaes as ending fairies, Keeho and Jiung quickly hoisted Intak off the floor and carried him backstage. Placing the rapper on the couch with a stack of cushions to elevate his legs, Jiung anxiously patted his dongsaeng’s pale cheeks, while a staff member fanned the boy with a stack of papers.

Intak was so unbelievably dizzy when he came to, his eyes still out of focus. With the adrenaline wearing off, the nausea returned with a vengeance, making him roll onto his side. Keeho managed to snatch a towel and hold it under Intak’s chin just in time for the rapper to gag up his nausea medicine. “You’re okay”, Jiung cooed and replaced the towel with a trash can, patting his dongsaeng’s back as he choked. Hurriedly removing the cushions, Keeho sat Intak up to help him breathe while the younger kept coughing. The leader placed the trash can between the rapper’s legs and winced when he threw up again. Intak barely managed to get a breath in before another large wave spilled from his lips. Rubbing slow, comforting circles on the rapper’s back, Jiung whispered: “Get it all out, your stomach will feel better afterwards.” – “You did so well”, Keeho praised, getting another towel that he wet with some cold water, draping ut across the back of his dongsaeng’s neck to ease his headache a little.

The rest of the members, joined them not much later, hearts aching when they found Intak sleepily curled up against Jiung’s side. It had taken a bit for the heaves to die down, his throat now burning from the strain. He couldn’t bring himself to drink anything, merely rinsing his mouth a couple of times to get rid of the vile taste. Now that the adrenaline was gone, Intak was zapped of all energy, finally breaking into tears after fighting so hard to keep it together. Seeing that he was probably done throwing up, Jiung opened his arms and inviting the rapper to cuddle into him. “It’s okay, you’re truly exhausted, huh?”, the older smiled sadly, scratching Intak’s scalp to soothe him. “Come on, put on your sweater”, Taeyang coaxed, “Sitting around in your sweaty stage outfit isn’t going to do you any good.”

It did need some convincing for Intak to move, unable to hold back a hoarse whimper at the pounding pain in his head. Taeyang stood in front of his dongsaeng, smoothing the shirt down his back while the younger sleepily rested his head against the other’s tummy. Cradling Intak’s head against his middle, the eldest promised: “We’ll get you to bed soon. There’s nothing for you to worry about. Hyungs will handle everything.” The rapper trembled, silent tears soaking into Taeyang’s shirt. It had been a while since he had last felt this miserable. The room seemed to be spinning at irregular speeds but his hyung’s arms kept him grounded. “Hyung, we grabbed you some tea”, Jongseob hummed, carrying a paper cup. Seeing that Intak wasn’t yet able to stomach anything and his hands were too shake, the maknae gave it to Taeyang to hold onto for the time being.

Intak was slowly drifting off against Taeyang, while the others got ready to leave. Before he could fall asleep though, the eldest had him sip some of the tea and they were relieved that it soothed both, his throat and his stomach. Shota came to remove Intak’s smeared makeup, while Taeyang freshened up too and the they were off. The rapper fell asleep against Jiung as they drove him back to the dorm, so he could rest. “Fee’ sick ‘gain”, Intak slurred when they pulled up to the building, only half awake. Cursing under his breath, Keeho got out and opened the door for the younger who didn’t even get to unbuckle his seatbelt before leaning out of the car, retching onto the pavement. Since Intak didn’t have much left in him, the spell was over once he heaved up a few mouthful of acid and Jiung unbuckled his seatbelt for him.

With how dizzy he was, it was hard to get Intak out of the car without him falling over but they eventually had him stumbling along between Keeho and Jiung, who prayed their dongsaeng would make it up to his room without anymore incidents because he already looked about to faint again. Taeyang rushed to removed the boy’s shoes but by the time they sat him down on his bed, he was ghostly pale anyway. Resting his hands on his dongsaeng’s shoulders, Keeho eased the boy down and shushed: “Breathe through the dizziness. We’re here now, you won’t have to move anytime soon.” – “Hyung, ‘m so tired”, Intak whimpered, draping his arm over his face as he waited for the dark spots to fade. “We know”, the leader sighed, running his hand through the rapper’s hair, “You did so well though. I’m really proud of you.”

Sadly, they could only get Intak cleared of his schedule, so there was no one who could stay with him. That’s why Jiung set him up with a bucket next to his bed, while Shota and Jongseob went through their snack cabinet and picked out some saltine crackers and pretzels. Taeyang brought a bottle of water and a sports drink, placing them on Intak’s nightstand next to the snacks their maknaes brought. “We’ll have to leave soon but you should try to get some fluids and electrolytes in as soon as your stomach settles down. There’s some stuff on your nightstand, anything particular you want us to get you before we leave?”, the eldest hummed, receiving a shake of the head, “You got your phone, so if you need anything, give us a call. Try to catch up on some sleep, okay? See you tonight.”

Finally having permission to rest, Intak was out before the door had even closed behind his friends.

#fanfic #fluff #comfort #fanfiction #sickfic #sick #emeto #tw emeto #tw rpf #p1harmony #novemetober

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gumnut-logic · 2 years ago

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TLC

What do we see here? Yet another sleepy Virgil fic?

Yeah, that’s all I had energy for. Gordy, you’re a champ.

Hope you enjoy these first words in ages, there not much, so don’t expect much, but they are something at least ::hugs the lot of you::

-o-o-o-

Virgil groaned as he sat down on the lounge. He should be in bed. It had been a long day…or days, he wasn’t really sure what the time was.

He’d settled Two in her hangar. If she had been horse, she would be lame, limping home with a leak in her hydraulic system messing with her flight. She was barely safe.

Not that he was going to tell Scott that. She wouldn’t be going out before some serious TLC, but she got him home.

She always gets him home.

He closed his eyes and let himself relax back into the cushions. The sigh that hissed between his teeth was involuntary but truly expressive.

Every muscle was tired, but none more than those in his feet. Specialised footwear or not, he’d spent the entire day on running, jumping, and working the exosuit. You could put all the padding in the world in those boots and his feet would still ache.

Plus he needed to cut at least one of the toenails on his left foot. Time was a thing that he had been short recently and it was a job that had been too low a priority…until those nails started digging into his other toes.

Maybe he could fall asleep here. Just doze and worry about debrief later.

The breeze blowing in from the open doors tousled his damp hair and poked at the t-shirt and trackpants he’d thrown on after his post-mission shower.

He really could just let himself go and not worry-

“Virg?”

He kept his eyes closed. If he couldn’t see Gordon, Gordon couldn’t see him.

“You okay?”

His shoulders dropped just a little as he let out an apologetic grunt. His brother was only expressing concern.

The couch cushions dipped to his left as his fish brother sat down beside him.

Virgil kept his eyes closed. He really didn’t have the energy to open them.

“Caught your last rescue. You sure you’re okay? John was worried.”

Another sigh and Virgil let out some words. “I’ll live.” Then that last bit clicked.

Virgil opened his eyes and stared at his brother. “I’m fine. John has nothing to worry about.”

But the concern on Gordon’s face was sincere. “John had every right to worry. That was a thirty-six hour stint and just look at you.”

Virgil blinked. “What?” He wasn’t injured.

But honestly, he was too tired to care. “Got debrief, then bed. Problem solved.” He lay back again and closed his eyes.

Really, he was considering sleeping right there. Getting up was too much effort.

“Virg?”

“What?”

“There is no debrief. Grandma ordered Scott to bed.”

Virgil frowned. “Huh?”

“Yeah, he was exhausted as you.”

He barely grunted at that.

“So, I’m dragging you to bed.”

Gordon had muscle and lots of it, but Virgil was big and the thought of his little brother attempting to manhandle him… “You and what army?”

“Me and my silver tongue, big bro.”

Virgil groaned. He was too tired for all that sudden sunshine.

“So, you gonna go to bed, or what?”

Virgil still had his eyes closed, but he didn’t need them to see that smirk on the Fish’s face.

“M’feet hurt.” The thought of standing was just ugh.

“Your feet hurt?” The weight beside him shifted as Gordon stood up.

A moment later, Virgil would have flinched away as his left foot was lifted with gentle but strong hands…but it required too much energy.

“You need to cut your toenails, bro.”

Virgil didn’t even bother to grunt.

But then gentle circles were being rubbed into the sole of his foot.

Oh god. “What are you doing?” Virgil sat up straighter, attempting to pull his foot away.

But Gordon tugged back. “Hey, relax. I got this.”

“Gordon.”

“Lie back a minute and I’ll pay you back for one of those post swim meet rub downs.” He held Virgil’s ankle tightly, but only enough to keep it in place. The Fish was stronger than he looked.

“Gordon.”

“Relax! That’s an order!”

What? But Gordon obviously had enough knowledge of foot anatomy because a knuckle pushed gently into Virgil’s sole and whatever he had been going to say melted away as that knuckle did good things.

There was silence a moment as strong fingers rubbed away ache.

“There…you see? All you need is a little TLC.”

Virgil didn’t answer, his eyes slipping closed again.

Those fingers gently lifted his other foot, letting it join in the magic.

His next sigh was one of blessed gratitude.

At some point Gordon started humming, but Virgil was beyond caring.

Time passed and muscles unwound.

Quiet words whispered near his ear. “You ready for bed?”

Umm…he rolled over. “Bed.”

Strong hands grabbed him and levered him upright, his arm was thrown over a shoulder, and he was moving. Several doors, whispered muttering, and he was lowered gently onto cool and soft sheets.

“Sleep, big bro.” A barely heard sigh. “You’ve earned it.”

He rolled over, curling into the bed covers carefully place over him.

And let slumber take him away.

-o-o-o-

#thunderbirds are go #thunderbirds #thunderbirds fanfiction #Virgil Tracy #Gordon Tracy #nuttyfic #FishTank #fishtank week 2023 #and yes it was a tss fic #Grandma did have to sit on Scott to get him to stay in bed and not worry about Virgil #He was just as exhausted #Gords had this one #Alan was puppy doy eyeing John out of orbit as well #all three big bros had a hard one #Grandma and tinies to the rescue #and yes I did come home from a very long day with sore feet #so sue me :P #sorry Virg

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goopyslimeybxstrd · 1 year ago

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“welcome to the circus!” sleepy boys inc. &co fanfic — chapter 1

hi! this is my first time writing a fanfic, posting an actual thing on tumblr and also the FIRST chapter of my circus au sbi&co fanfic!

this would normally be posted on ao3 but i’m currently waiting for my invitation.. but im very excited to share it with people and my friend recommended posting it on here since apparently fics do very well on here:)

BETA READ BY CLEETUSPAWS (THANK YOU SO MUCH!)

the rain hit the stone tiles of the street with loud pitter-patters, accompanied by the splash of a red pair of vans and black converse walking through a puddle. toby sighed when rain hit his head through the umbrella, looking up at the inconveniently placed hole. he turned to tommy with a frown, who was blissfully unaware and munching happily on his shitty sausage role from the sketchy bakery a few blocks away.

“tom, the umbrellas got a hole in it.. and my hairs getting wet.”

toby sighed, tapping tommy on the shoulder with a small slightly annoyed smile, pointing to the hole once tom had looked over.

tommy looked puzzled,

“what the fuck man? this umbrella was fine like— two days ago, when that guy gave it to me.. did you bite it or something tubs?”

he snickered, nudging the other boy with his elbow, a smirk plastered across his face, causing toby to fall backwards a tiny bit. he gasped, folding his arms.

“hey! don’t you be nudging me, also, i’m not a rat, i didn’t bite the umbrella. i don’t think it would be that tasty anyway..”

he grinned, nudging the blonde back with a laugh.

tom laughed out loud, finally moving the umbrella around so the hole was behind the both of them, the rain still cruising through but luckily far enough away that it wasn’t bothering the two. the hair of the two swayed in sync in the soft breath of the wind and the rain seemed louder on the top of the run-down umbrella now. or maybe they seemed quieter; it was hard to tell.

they had been quieter with eachother than normal recently, anyway. tommy had noticed it, assuming tubbo hadn’t so much. if toby noticed anything wrong he would obviously tell him, right? that’s how it’s been going since they were twelve years old— how its been going since they declared they were best friends in that shitty run down orphanage. shivers run down his spine at even the mention of that place. what a nightmare of a shithole, tom felt a pang of guilt for all the kids who were still stuck there, trapped in the foster system. he just hopes they wake up one day and take the chances of escaping.

tom snapped back into reality after a short moment, rolling his eyes at the fact he had a full train of thought about the life he so desperately wanted to leave behind in the dirt. maybe one day they’ll be able to help out some kids to escape that dump.

well, obviously not now.

scraping his lunch funds together was difficult enough for him.. let alone having to donate to the homeless shelter camp thing so he and toby can still ‘live’ somewhere.

“it’s practically paying rent, just masked as a nicer thing.” he explained to toby once, after they’d dropped whatever money they had left at the end of the month into the red bucket gripped by the owner of the land.

toby sighed, looking over to tom who had a wry look in his eyes, turning away quickly. he made an awkward facial expression before speaking:

“is it a mcdonald’s night.. or have we already spent too much money today?” he quizzed, glancing up to tommy and watching his hand as he brought it up to brush it through his hair, the blonde strands falling over his forehead again comfortably.

tommy thought for a moment, suddenly turning up to tubbo with a cheeky smile.

“you know what tubzo? why not man? we deserve it. we’ve been working all week and shit..” he gushed, gripping the umbrella tighter in his hand. toby seemed to catch up on the excitement, grinning back at him.

they walked faster now, turning onto a different street other than the one which would direct them home, chatting along until tommy stopped. turning to a telephone pole and looking at the brightly coloured poster stamped on it.

‘CASTING OPEN’ it read in a big pink font, a black shadow decorating it. under that violation to the eyes, there was extra text. holy shit.

there layed the logo of the ‘syndicate circus’, the swirly writing all too familiar and sported with the three colours for the three members. yellow for acrobur (‘what a stupid fucking name,’ tommy thought, who hates their child that much? he hates to admit acrobur was probably his favourite, though..), a bright green for crowman and a vibrant red for the blood god. jesus christ.

he poked tubbo on the shoulder, pointing to the poster and aggressively tapping on it.

“toby. are. you. seeing. this? castings for SYNDICATE? TUBZ. THIS WOULD BE INSANE.” he marvelled, grabbing the poor boy by his shoulders and shaking him slightly.

toby scoffed,

“tom you’re being a bit ambitious.. they wouldn’t let two teenagers - who barely have any talent at all - within fifty feet of the tent, let alone in it.”

tom rolled his eyes, crossing his arms, “you’re so boring, toby!” he ranted, sounding agitated,

”such a pussy. you know that right? you’re a puss.”

his tone changed to a teasing one, poking at the brunette with a cheeky grin.

tubbo blinked, crossing his arms and raising his eyebrows, waiting for tommy to continue.

tom scoffed, hands moving around in strange gestures as he attempts to explain—-

“okay- look, toby, like.. you’re good at those fuckin trampolines and i’m like really funny!”

tom stared at tubbo while he thought, his mumbles snapping the other out of his train of thought,

“and like.. i’ve always loved syndicate circus and i just think it’d be REALLY cool..”

toby stared with a blank face, a smile creeping up slowly,

“well- you’re not that funny. but its just.. we might not have enough money to support that, tom.”

tommy massaged his temple, right. money. that’s a good point. oh well!

“who fuckin cares about money?? imagine how much we could make from joining THE syndicate circus!” he exclaimed.

toby lowered his head, thinking again before looking up to tommy about to speak—

“come on, man! pleaase?? please please? pretty please, toby..????” tom begged, trying his hardest to do some kind of puppy-eyes.. and failing.

tubbo sighed. ‘anything to make tommy be quiet,’ he thought, turning to check the date on the poster.

“fine,” he muttered, “but as soon as ANYTHING goes wrong, we’re out of there. got it?”

#sleepy bois fanfic #sleepy bois au #fanfic #tommyinnit #dsmp fanfic #tubbo #fic #fanfiction #sleepy bois inc #dsmp au #dsmp #mcyt #clingy duo #dream smp #au #circus #circusau #welcometothecircus

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feather-rose · 2 years ago

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Date Night.

......

Neji: Man, that show..

Tenten: You mean that Mulan show?”( She pointed the TV show here.)

Neji: I kinda like that show way better than the remake of that disney movie.”( He looked back down at her figure that lounged onto him, like his body belonged to hers.. Even if they laid onto the same bed after the trwo of them had gotten out from the hospital after covid’s longtime scare. Especially, Neji.)

And moved to his uncle’s basement, for the time being. Until he and Tenten were fully recovered same like Hinata who was still stuck up, at her bedroom for precautious isolation like them. In into their pajamas. No sex involved, here!

When it gotten to him, it nearly tried to kill him. Even if Tenten was a bit lucky than he was, it had been an very frightened experience. Near death, experience.

Neji: No offense, here.

Tenten( Rose up an questionning eyebrow at him, as she held him back.): Just because I’m chinese? None taken, buddy. I’m stuck with you, remember?”

Neji: For better and worse?”

Tenten: And for ever more, dude! Deal it up with my moodswings once you get married to me!”

Neji just laughed at at joke. He loved everything about her. Tenten. Even if she was through her bad moods and good ones. Thrilling to make a crazy jump into adventure while he just stood by, looking nervous and constipated, until she went through his life.

It changed for good. She changed him for the better. Breaking through that comforting shelter.

And he just knew, that he wanted to be with her, forever. He hadn’t realized that, at first.

Until he was at such horrifying health scare. So scary, that he could’ve had felt her holding up his hand and talking to him, when he was into a induced coma. Because of COVID complications.

When she didn’t hadn’t so much of the tragic complications through them. Maybe, because of her immune system. But anyways, covid often acts in different ways despite the person.

And yet, here he was still alive and kicking as Naruto had often said. Kicking up alive.

As he felt Tenten’s head slowly laid onto his chest as she watched the flat screen here,

Tenten(Breaking the silent moment here.): It’s quite a good thing, here.”

Neji: Like what?”

Tenten: Hearing someone’s heartbeat and especially your love ones. Still beating up, here and loving you back.” And she never let her emotions go away to people unless, it was to close ones, here. Like him.

Neji(Moved by her words.): Tenten..

Tenten(Shook her head as it she was holding back tears from what Neji understood as her voice began to shake..): I’m thankful and grateful, you’ve made it throgh, Neji. Cause, I don’t know what I’ve would have done without you.”

Neji: I know. I know. And I love you for that.”( KIsses her forehead as he tighten up his embrace over to her body, when his phone that sat onto the nightstand had started to vibrate here,)

Intrigued, he looked back up at his left corner and reached up with his free arm, to grab his phone and snatched up open, until he cracked up into snort laugh, here which it dragged Tenten’s attention. Which it made her chuckled when she noticed his reaction.

Tenten: What are you laughing, about?”

Neji( Couldn’t stopped himself from grinninhg here.) From Chouji’s phone. He posted a few pictures here. If you know what I mean. Look.( He showed up his phone over to his soon wife, here as she gasped to cracking laughter here.)

Tenten(Cracking up a grin.):No way! Chouji, really did that?”

Neji(Nods back with a grin.): He sure did!( He showed her up the pictures through his phone.)

The fact, that he guy had taken a few flashing photos of a naked and sleepy Sasuke walking aroud the Uchiha campound, it was just priceless and too funny to forget for the new enganged couple.

As the two of them laughed together.

#nejiten #covid sucks #naruto anime and modern word #spin-off #of lockdown #neji never died #sasuke has a good butt #sitcom #humor #bittersweet moment #mulan tv show #date night #hyuga campound and basement

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dusty-tomes · 5 months ago

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Weekly Writing Report #3

9.16.24 - 9.22.24

Week 3 is over! And considering there were no wasp stings this time, it was even better than the last!

✨ words written: 11,255* 💫 WIP total word count: 38,812* 🌙 mood: ☕️ 🪐 notes:

It’s been one of those weeks where I’m sort of just drawing a blank on anything that happened in the last six days. Maybe because it was much less eventful than last week? Not exactly sure. Though, looking at the numbers, I wrote more than the previous week so that’s cool.

Unfortunately, no more creativity sessions with the friend-o were to be had. But! I did start doing little solo writing sessions right after dinner. Usually I feel too tired and sleepy and just want to relax and then end up spending an hour and a half watching YouTube, but I managed to make a little system where i motivated myself with a treat in the form of some chocolate. Plus I did my best to romanticize the aesthetic of writing while it got dark with my fairy lights and soft lighting and having a cup of tea (or hot vanilla! which I tried for the first time this week. It was quite good. Comforting, y'know?) and a dessert while i worked, which did wonders. I didn’t always have the most productive sessions during this time since I was still tired from the day, especially on a school day, but I did get some more words in and it was fun, so well worth the effort I think.

I forgot completely about my stretch goal to reach 3k and as a result didn’t even try, but at this point in the month I don’t want to push myself too hard. This is about the point when I usually start to flag and lose motivation as I've learned from doing monthly challenges and such before, so to prevent completely burning myself out I'm trying to just stick to approximately the same word count range I've been in the rest of the month. I could do less, to be honest, but currently I'm content where I'm at.

I did, however hit 2k in a day again this week. Yay me!

Next week is my last week before I take a bit of a break. I'll just say my goal is to have fun and finish out strong. Cheesy, but what can you do?

*Numbers may be updated later today. I plan to write more after I post this.

#writing #writeblr #weekly update #dusty talks a lot #creative writing #writers on tumblr

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bylightofdawn · 2 years ago

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WIP Sunday

NGL this almost didn't happen mainly because I've been kinda disatified with a lot that I've written today. I did get this scene with Jaster and Mij written and I've gotten to the next part where they are observing a suspected Death Watch safehouse so the plot is inching forward slowly.

I've just been so damn sleepy all day because of the shit weather and my bones have been aching which just makes me want to bundle up under blankets and not do anything but sleep. So the brain fog has been real.

So I have this scene, I'm not happy with it and can't really figure out how to write it in a way I am going to be happy about it. Sometimes you just gotta accept things aren't going to be perfect and you just need to push through to the next part. I might end up heavily editing this once I figure out some stuff in my head. I hate how we have no real firm idea of what the Mand'alor system is beyond vague autocratic? Prolly? Surely they have councils of advisors right? No one person is going to be able to rule a dozen planets without some kind of system in place. Is it a sorta of feudal court system a la say Charlamagne? We canonly have barons so is it more of a medival pre-Barons Rebellion England sort of system with huge planetary barony being represented at central court?

WHO THE FUCK KNOWS. There has to be some kind of representative government of some kind though? Surely. -drags hands down face- If not, I think Jaster is just going to suggest that because autocracies never end well. Pffffft. Fuck me I think I'm going to have to do some reading on early Greek democractic governing. I detest the idea of the Roman Republic era Sentate with it's horrifically unbalanced power-structure of the Patrician and equastrian classes versus the plebians. But I of course, as an American fully recognize the failures in OUR version of demoncracy. And I'll be the first to admit I've never been a huge student of Greek history beyond like the broadest of strokes.

Hi yes, I am debating if I need to invent an entire cobbled together style of Mandalorian government for the needs of my fanfic. Welcome to my stupid blog where we obsess over the STUPIDEST of details for hours or days on end.

ANYWAY, WIP Sunday, right let's post this before it's Midnight shall we?

As always, it's unedited blah blah blah. You know the drill.

“I see you two are getting along famously.” Jaster drawled as he took up Jango’s place in packing the food away.

“He’s a good kid. For the most part.”

“He is.” Jaster agreed, not taking offense to that little caveat because he was all too aware of how maddening Jango could be at times. “How is he doing? He was pretty upset.”

“He’s gone through a lot recently. I’m not going to lie it’s definitely taken its toll. And he’s blaming himself because Montross go away.” Mij confessed with a frown.

“He screwed up, there’s no doubt about that.” The dark-haired man was frowning down at the container in his hands. “But I would have done the same thing at his age. Hell, my first instinct was do do the same thing but Jango just doesn’t have the experience yet to see running directly at a problem isn’t the only solution.”

“He’s young, hopefully that’ll come with time.”

“I’ll need to talk to him about it. But now probably isn’t the time. He’s so damn prickly, I swear, half the time I say the wrong thing and make it worse.”

“Welcome to having a teenage son. Or teenager in general I suspect.” The younger man stated blandly.

Jaster shot him an exasperated look over one shoulder which didn’t bother him in the least.

“He’s desperate to be treated like an adult and his ego is about as thin as a piece of flimsi so if you treat him like a kid or if he even perceives you are treating him that way, he’s going to shut down on you.”

He reminded himself Mij had been right, the last time they talked about Jango.

“Yeah, you’re probably right. I’ll talk to him about it.”

“If I can make a suggestion? Don’t put it off too long. the kid feels pretty bad about how things went down with Montross. His head might not be in the game if he’s worried about disappointing you twice in one night.”

“I’ll take it under advisement, thanks, Mij. Though, I’m also going to politely ask you to butt out of my personal life.” Jaster said as he put the food container down and turned to look fully at the doctor. “I know you called Plo Koon to come here tonight. Myles was passed out and there is no way Jango would have ever voluntarily invited him into our problems.”

To his credit, the younger man didn’t quell under his heavy stare.

“Understood but I’m not going to apologize for doing it. You went through a traumatic event tonight and needed support. Who all here would you have turned to?”

The infuriating thing was he wasn’t wrong and he knew it, but it set a terrible precedent and he needed to nip it in the bud right now.

“It puts Plo in a precarious position though. What we’re planning on doing? Not going to fly with the Coruscanti government if we get caught. Imagine the scandal if a Jedi is linked to that. There’s a reason I was trying to keep him away from this bantha-karked rodeo.”

Mij seemed to consider that for a moment before nodding. “I see your point, I won’t call him in again.”

“Thank you. I appreciate the thought and there is some truth to your words. But there’s a reason the adage about being lonely at the top exists.”

“That’s a terrible expression and blatantly untrue. I can cite plenty of studies that show a leader who has a strong support system around them has a much more stable history of commanding while those who try and do it all themselves tend to burn out, become paranoid despots who cling to their power or generally suffer a decline in leadership ability.”

“If I start showing despotic tendencies, I’m sure you will call me out on it.” He pointed out with a trace of sarcasm in his voice.

“It doesn’t need to get to that point is what I am saying, Jaster.” Mij said firmly. “I know asking you to trust right now is pretty damned hard. But you have a chance to build up a support system around yourself. Especially now that the garbage that is someone like Montross has taken themselves out of the picture.”

“You’re right, it’s too much to ask for right now.” Jaster stated flatly.

“I get that, but you can start thinking about it now. Realistically, do you have to be the one taking point on leading the company on campaigning? Imagine if you handed some of the day to day operations to a few trusted lieutenents so you can focus on the big picture? Things like this peace summit.”

“I’m not going to abandon my people or my post.”

“That’s not what I’m saying at all. Stars, I swear in so many ways, Mandalorians have this all or nothing propensity for absolutist thinking that is positively maddening” Mij grumbled, sounded frustrated. In a lot of ways, because he had come to the Mandalorian culture as an adult, he was both blessed and cursed with an outsider perspective on his adopted culture’s strengths and weaknesses.

Jaster often found he had some genuinely interesting insight which was why he put up with the man’s often cranky or borderline insubordinate attitude at times.

“Then what do you mean exactly?”

“I’m not suggesting you retire from your post but realistically, do you not have enough trusted commanders who can handle a lot of the day to day headaches like planning out the next campaign, worrying about logistics or even negotiating with clients?”

“So giving up leadership essentially?” Jaster asked with a trace of annoyance in his voice now.

“Delegating. You can still supervise but do you really need to be in the field every single time in the thick of things?”

“This is how I became Mand’alor though. You’re suggesting I give up the thing that is central to my power-base in a lot of ways.”

“It would give you more time to shore-up said power-base and expand it. You implemented the council of advisors and that helped give you the power-base to get this far. Try expanding upon that idea. There are other ways of ruling than just being a simple autocratic rule.”

“I like bending tradition as much as the next idealistic fool but you can only bend it too far before the people will rebel. There’s a reason things have always been done this way for the most part. Yes, there have been short-lived experiments and attempts at doing things different ways but they almost always ended in disaster.”

“Because things have worked out so well for Mandalore thus far?”

“We’ve survived thus far.”

“That is a load of bantha poodoo and now you’re just being contrarian to be contrarian because you don’t believe that <I>osik</I> anymore than I do. We wouldn’t be here if that were the case.”

He couldn’t really argue with the doctor because he was right, Jaster’s pride just objected at admitting that.

“So what are you suggesting, exactly?”

“I think you should talk to someone like Kryze who’s prolly go more experience in the matter than both of us combined.”

“With all that free time I have right now.”

“I’m sure you’ll find some time to carve out on this trip. He seems like a pretty solid bloke, all things considered.”

“He does, and I don’t necessarily disagree with you on the experience point. He’s definitely been born and raised in the politics side of things so maybe tapping him for advise isn’t a terrible idea.”

“Thanks, I have those on occasion.”

#el writes #wip sunday #fanfic snippets #seeds for the future fic #jaster mereel #mij gilamar #mij continutes to be the agony aunt of the true mandalorians and I am here for it #also one day jaster will learn his lesson and not ask mij his opinion on shit #because he doesn't always like the answers #but you asked so you can't really bitch if you don't like the answer honey #that's not how it works #fanfic writing woes #fanfic worldbuilding

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artemiseamoon · 3 years ago

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After everything

Santiago ‘Pope’ Garcia x f reader | oneshot | ft the TF guys

Words: 1,918

Warnings: injuries, blood mentioned, a death , mention of depression

An: this oneshot was inspired by a scene in the screenplay, one that's not in the film. With an AU arte twist of course. I’m still slowly clearing out my drafts (111 drafts in there 😩) and scheduling them to post at random times. I play roulette with queue 😂 anyway, I wrote this last year.

Mejillones, Chile

Exhausted from the harrowing journey and mission gone South, you feel every muscle, every bone in your body ache. Everyone was all kinds of banged up, some worse than others. You almost fell off a cliff and got grazed by a bullet. Thankfully the chopper crash didn’t do much damage aside from some scrapes and bruises.

You were so depleted toward the last 24 hours of the trek, you nearly passed out a few times. The guys insisted you get rest for the short stay here in Mejillones. But you weren’t doing that. You wanted to be useful and went along with Benny to the pharmacist to get antibiotics for Will.

After Will getting shot and everything you all went through, Benny was in one of those dark moods, the kinds you all worry about when he gets that way. You decide to stay close to him and be a support system, even if he has shut down and isn't saying much. Then there’s Tom, he’s dead too, and though you had no real option of the man, the team cared for him, his death was a hard hit.

When the pharmacist denies having antibiotics, even though he clearly does and Ben is speaking good Spanish to him, you find yourself frustrated and interrupt. You dig in your pocket and slap a generous amount of money on the table, then repeat exactly what Ben asked for.

The pharmacist's eyes lite up. He slid the bills toward him and smiled for the first time. In minutes you have what you asked for and leave the small shop, bag in hand. As you walk, your eyes land on the tall blonde next to you and the somber look on his face. Interlacing your arm in his, you pull Benny close.

“We’re almost home. It’s going to be alright.”

When his blue eyes meet yours the sadness and worry in them breaks your heart. He almost lost Will. He almost lost you, his best friend, Tom was dead, the job was a mess; Benny felt like shit, and was likley depressed. But you’ve been here with him before, you all have, and you know he will get past it, he always does.

“Thanks for going with me.” Is all he says before looking straight ahead again. Then he says, “you still have a limp.”

“It's manageable, I’ll live. My ankle is irritated still.”

The two of you walk the rest of the way back to the hotel in silence, arm and arm.

The sleepy little port town isn't much, but it’s mostly quiet, quaint and in some ways peaceful. It seems to be tourist season but it's a good pause after everything, and before you move on to the next steps.

When you get back to the hotel, Benny goes straight to Wills room to give him antibiotics and you go to your own for a few minutes before deciding to check on Frankie, like Will you wouldn't know he was injured, he just soldiered through the whole ordeal like the pro he is, but the helo crash cut up his arms and ribs in some places. Benny tended to his bloody wounds immediately after the crash and you took over, so Benny could focus on Will.

You use your signature knock and Frankie lets you in. He finishes buttoning up his shift. It’s a bright, flowery thing, but having been in the same clothes for days, none of you really had the luxury to be picky right now. You shopped at the little tourist shop and all looked the part now.

“Are you in pain? How are you feeling?”

Frankie sits on the bed with a groan. You try to keep a straight face but snicker. You’ve never seen him in such bright clothes before, including light blue shorts.

He curses under his breath and looks down at himself. “ i look like a fucking idiot, “ his eyes move about the room until he finds his hat, he slips it on. You started calling it his emotional support cap a few months back. “ I feel like a dumbass.”

“You look fun and colorful,” you grin and sit at the chair near the bed. “So, the pain?”

“Yeah, I’m fine,” he readjusts the cap on his head, “the pain is a good reminder of my dumb ass attitude that i can survive anything.”

“My bets are still always on you as the last one standing Fish, you can survive anything.”

Your friend flashes you a small barely there grin. “I’m good, you don’t have to watch after me. You need to rest yourself. We almost lost you to some fucking cliff.”

“I know, but I’m here, right, and so are you.” You stand and head for the door. As you reach it, you remember what is in your pocket and put it on his table, its pain meds in case he needs them. “Juanito Cafe, by the beach in an hour. Lunch and beers?”

Frankie nods and you leave the room. You’re only in the hall for two seconds when Pope runs into you, you bump into each other as you turn the corner.

“You weren’t in your room.”

“I was getting those pain meds for Frankie.”

“Before that.” Santi’s serious tone takes you aback.

“Well, boss, I went with Ben to get meds. Anything else you need to know?” You say jokingly but his expression remains unchanged. “Hey what's up with you?”

Santiago grabs your hand and leads you back to his room. Once you're inside, he paces and runs his hand over his face.

“Okay, you’re worrying me now Santiago.”

“You almost died.” He stands still, his brown eyes heavy on yours.

“I know.”

Santiago sighed and rested his hands on his hips. “You don’t know what it was like, watching you slip, seconds away from plummeting to your death. And you’re just brushing it off, running around playing nurse for everyone.”

“I’m not playing it off Santi!” you surprise yourself with the raised tone. “I’m trying to not think about it because it's all I think about. When we got here, I tried to take a nap after a much needed shower and I revlied every horrible second of it. So yeah, I'm not talking about it, and I’m keeping busy because I can't take a freaking breath. I can't shake being that close to dying in such a terrible way. I'm not even bothered by the bullet graze, I can handle that -“ you stop talking and suck in a big breath. Feeling more frustrated by the second. “I just - let me be helpful okay, so I don’t have to think.”

Your confession seems to soften Santi and he relaxes, you can see it in his eyes, his face, his body.

“Shit, I didn't know.”

“Well, now you do. I am reliving my near death experince every fucking second and helping my friends is the only that that gives me a break, so yeah, i have been holding on to that and I’d like to keep doing that….with your goddamed permission.” Despite being frustrated, and the tears in your eyes now, you bookend the last part with a little smile.

Santiago pulls you into his arms, hugging you close and tight. You melt against him and rest your hands on his back.

“I’m sorry i pushed so hard I just - i - we thought we lost your for good and my fucking world broke. If I ever lost you, I couldn't come back from that.”

You lean your head back enough to see him, while still holding on to him. His eyes meet yours.

“There’s shit i never got to say - that I never worked up the - “

“Santi, what are you talking about?”

“I’m in love with you, okay? I think, I think i’ve been in love with you for a really long time and almost losing you opened my fucking eyes and I can’t-”

You cut him off with your lips, kissing him as your fingers threaten into his dark curls. You feel Santiago smile against your lips before eagerly kissing you back.

An hour and a half later - Juanito Cafe

Though the journey isn't over yet, and all of you would be dealing with what happened down here for a while, in your own ways, you can savor this moment.

Sitting on a beach eating some local food with your friends, your family. The calming sound of ocean waves in the background as you hear the guys laugh for the first time in days as they share some beers. Will has some color back in his face and Benny smiles, he hasn’t smiled in days.

This moment feels like peace after the hell you all just went through, together. The bright sun is shielded by the umbrella over the table, and the occasional breeze from the sea is deeply soothing. Then there’s the handsome brown eyed man next to you, the one whose thigh is touching yours and his hand occasionally rests on your knee under the table.

The man who's your friend and means so much to you. The man you fell for but didn't dare mention it or go for it until he confessed over an hour ago in his hotel room and you responded with a kiss. One of many peppered inbetween sweet confessions

“How long are we thinking of staying here?” You asked, Santi’s hand returned to your knee.

“We leave in the morning.” Will responds.”As soon as the boat is gassed up.”

Benny jumps in, “ we should stay a few days. You need to rest. So does Fish.”

“I’ll rest on the boat,” Will and Benny lock eyes, “Ben, I’m okay. Really. We need to complete what we started. Plenty of time for rest later.”

Frankie playfully messes up Bennys hair, which causes him to crack a smile, and shifts his mood, even if just for a moment.

Later that night, hotel

Standing on the balcony, you take in the stunning view of the ocean and the way the moon shines on the water. You make a promise to yourself to make every single cent of this money count because you and your friends almost lost your damn lives over it, and it wasn’t really worth it in the long run. But you can't change time, or turn back the clock. All you can do is move forward.

A knock rings out from the other side of your door. One you know very well. When you open it and see his handsome face, you feel butterflies in your stomach. “Santi.”

“I checked on everyone so you didn’t have to,” he kisses you softly and enters the room. You close the door behind him. “Fish is sleeping off all those antibiotics, Will is asleep and Bennys up, keeping watch over Will.”

“He needs to sleep too.”

“So do you.”

You nod, “ good point.”

“I can only pick one of you to cuddle with tonight,” he grins, “I'm a great cuddler, you’ll be asleep in no time.”

“Like when I fell asleep against you in that terrible jungle rain? God that sucked.”

“Sure, but better. Ocean breeze,” he grabs your hips and draws you closer to him, “a soft bed -”

Melting against him, you wrap your arms around his shoulders and look into his eyes. “You’re right, so much better. Let me get changed and let the cuddling begin.”

Thanks for reading!

#santiago pope garcia #Santiago Garcia #santiago Garcia x f reader #Frankie Morales #Benny miller #Will miller #triple frontier

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dreamingofaizawa · 4 years ago

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Obedient (Rewritten)

Soft! Yandere! Erasermic x Chubby! Fem! Reader

***18+ Fic***

You must be 18 years old or older to participate in this reading. If you are not, please remove yourself from the line and find another piece. Thank you.

Warnings: Yandere, stalking, implied drugging, kidnapping, reader is way too fucking calm with the situation, Stockholm Syndrome, BDSM themes, a collar, body worship, the word Daddy once, smut, double penetration (diff. holes), anal, unprotected sex, overstimulation, aftercare.

Word Count: 6.6 k

Author's Note: Alright. I've been wanting to rewrite this for a while now. Obedient was the very first fic I'd ever written and posted back in September, and my writing has changed A LOT since then. Reading the original, I realized there's a lot that I can change and tweak, and a lot that wasn't very clearly or well written (in my opinion). So, here it is!

You can find the original here.

Enjoy~

“Happy birthday to me.” The words tumble loosely from your lips on a heaved breath, your fingers curled lazily around a cold glass of whiskey.

It isn’t a rare occurrence to see you perched atop a stool at the edge of the bar, nursing your third glass at 2am on a Friday night. Or rather Saturday morning. It’s one of the only places you can find solace, away from nosy coworkers and nosier acquaintances. The loneliness is soberingly blissful. You never cared much for social interaction.

At this point the bar is emptying, only a handful of bodies sticking around in the early hours. In the reflections of the rows of glass liquor bottles you see them again. Two lanky figures sitting in the corner booth at the back of the establishment. Any normal person would see them and think nothing. But you know better. When you first walked into the bar six months ago they were in that exact spot, and every time afterward they’d be there when you walked in and stayed after you left.

You, being observant as you are, always watched everything from your spot at the bar, the slightly warped images in the glass serving as your eyes for the night. It didn’t take long for you to figure the two were watching you every time you stepped inside. The blonde one always sat with his back to you, and his head would occasionally turn in the reflection. You’d alternate seats to make sure you weren’t imagining things, but it only confirmed what you’d suspected.

Not that you cared enough to do anything about it.

As long as they keep their distance you’re perfectly content letting them look. And they did keep their distance. They’d never even come within 5 feet of you, seemingly happy with just lingering glances. Of course, tonight would be a different story.

You watch as their glassy reflections stand up, the distance between you and them shrinking with each of their long strides. You let your eyes fall to the amber liquid in your hands, praying they’d only pass you by on their way out. Two sets of footsteps approached, two bodies popped up on either side of you, and a deep, silky smooth voice sounded on your right.

“Mind if we take a seat?” A glance to your right revealed a rugged, yet handsome man peering down at you with his deep, tired onyx eyes. Long raven hair spilled over his shoulders, framing his chiseled jaw peppered with barely tamed scruff and a scar curved along his cheekbone. You turn to look at his friend, long blonde hair pulled up into a high bun and hypnotic green eyes focused on you behind orange tinted sunglasses despite being indoors past midnight. He is handsome as well, a small mustache on his smiling lips, high cheekbones and a sharp jawline drawing you in.

You couldn’t help but feel they look familiar, somehow. You’d seen their faces before, somewhere, but you pushed that to the back of your mind for now.

It wouldn’t hurt to let them sit with you, right? They seem friendly enough, and it’s better to entertain them in case things go south should you reject their request. With a small, tired smile, you nod.

“Sure thing, fellas.” They both plop down on either side of you and the blonde immediately gets talking.

��So what’s the occasion, little listener?” Two thoughts came to mind. One, how did he know there was any occasion, two, what kind of pet name is ‘little listener’? Your confusion must have shown on your face, because the raven haired man spoke up.

“You’re pretty dolled up for a night at the bar, kitten.” Ah. So they had been watching you. You aren’t wearing anything that would normally be considered ‘dolled up’. Your tan sweater and black skirt are relatively plain, and the platform boots you’re wearing accompanied by your thigh-high socks are something you’re experimenting with.

But usually you entered the bar with a white button-up and black slacks from your job as a waitress. Today you had time to go home and pamper yourself a bit before heading to your usual drinking spot. Evidently, they noticed. You bring your glass up to your lips and gulp down the remaining liquid before entertaining the question.

“Nothing special. Call it a birthday party.” And hey, you mean it when you say it isn’t special. Your birthday only marks yet another routine year on this earth. The blonde nudges your shoulder with his own.

“I’d say that’s pretty special, sunshine!” The alcohol must be affecting you, because you chuckle a bit at his enthusiasm.

“Just another year gone by, you know?” You’re never this talkative sober. The man on your right rapped his knuckles on the bartop, the barkeep making his way over with a tired smile.

“One more glass for this pretty kitty here.” The name had your eyebrows raising.

“This one’s on me.” As the fresh glass was sat on the bartop you scoffed quietly.

“Kitty?” A deep hum came from the man.

“Well how would you describe yourself, kitten?” Somewhere in your muddled brain you warned yourself not to be self-deprecating on your 25th birthday. You didn’t listen.

“Definitely not feline. I’m short and chunky and the only thing cat-like about me is my posture and eyeliner,” you stated, matter-of-factly. As a waitress at an esteemed high-end restaurant, you had to learn to be quick on your feet, agile, and most importantly, poised. A hum comes from the blonde, a muttered ‘pretty and humble’ floating on his breath. You force a chuckle at the statement.

“Pretty is also a word I wouldn’t use to describe myself.” A short silence falls between the three of you, and you take the time to study their faces. Where had you seen them before? You’re certain if you’d met them before you’d remember them, you don’t tend to forget attractive people.

They’re oddly patient as they watch the cogs in your brain turn, your eyes taking in every detail of every feature. Your breath caught and your eyes went wide when you’d finally placed their faces.

“Present Mic and Eraserhead. You’re pro heroes.” The words are quiet, nearly imperceptible as you breathe them, but they’re close enough to hear. Present Mic beams at the recognition.

“In the flesh, sunshine. But we’d prefer you use our names.” Eraserhead leans away and sticks a hand out for a handshake.

“Shouta Aizawa.” You shake his hand and turn to the blonde, who similarly has his hand held out.

“Hizashi Yamada.” You introduce yourself, a bit shaky and only slightly starstruck. What in the world are two pro heroes doing talking to you? As you regain your composure you excuse yourself to the restroom. You weren’t prepared to talk to heroes tonight. A glance in the mirror has you sobering yourself, rationalizing their strange behavior. These two are pro heroes. They were clearly only worried about your safety, a woman all alone in a bar till the earliest hours of the morning. ‘That’s why they were watching me’, you muse. You quickly fix yourself, then step back out to the two heroes.

The three of you pass another hour of time before you decide it’s time for you to head home. They offer to give you a lift, but you politely decline. You can't intrude on them any more than you already had. Hizashi insists otherwise.

“Please Sunshine? If something were to happen to you we’d never forgive ourselves!” It made sense to you. They’re pro heroes after all, it’s in their nature to worry. So you oblige to ease their anxieties.

Since Shouta hadn’t touched any alcohol, he’s driving, and you punch your address into the GPS system of their very expensive looking car. As you sit back, Hizashi holds a bottle over his head.

“Water?” You thank him and drain the bottle, realizing you’re a bit more dehydrated than you initially thought. In your semi-drunk haze you fail to notice that the bottle had already been opened, and you miss Shouta’s eyes watching you down the beverage through the rearview mirror.

It’s only five minutes later you feel drowsy, your head lolling to the side and eyelids drooping. You don’t quite register the question Hizashi asks you, and when you don’t answer he turns around to look at you.

“You seem tired, Sunshine. Take a nap, we’ll wake you up when we get there.” Your exhaustion takes hold over any rational thoughts, and with a sleepy nod, you stretch out over the backseat and let your mind slip into unconsciousness, blissfully unaware you’ll never see your apartment again.

The first thing you notice as you wake up is how stiff and sore your muscles are. It takes you a moment to realize you aren’t in your clothes from last night, nor are you in your own bed. Your eyes snap open and you sit up, taking in the unfamiliar room. With a curse under your breath you scour your memory for anything, checking if you’d gone home with anyone or gotten yourself in a tight situation. The last thing you remember is being driven home by the two pros, then passing out in their backseat.

Questions began forming in your mind. ‘Where am I? How did I get here? Where had the two heroes gone?’ In an attempt to think clearer, you try crossing your legs, but your ankle is stopped short by something heavy. Throwing off the blanket, a thick metal cuff glinted in the light of the room, an equally thick chain leading somewhere over the side of the bed.

When your breathing begins to quicken, you settle your mind, refusing to panic. Willing yourself to relax, you begin to think about how you can get out of this situation. ‘Today should be Saturday. Assuming this room is part of a house, someone would most likely still be here’. With a small breath, you speak, hopefully loud enough for someone to hear you.

“H-hello? Is someone there?” It only takes a few seconds for footsteps to reach your ears, and the door opens to the last person you’re expecting to see. A ruggedly handsome Shouta Aizawa stands in the doorway, leaning against the doorframe with a small smirk on his lips.

“Good morning, Kitty.” As endearing as the pet name is, the only emotion you feel right now is confusion. Your mind is drifting to all the fanfiction you’d read online, piecing together the events of last night like a puzzle. ‘The bottle of water was already open’. In your defense, they’re pro heroes, it’s only natural for you-- or anyone, really-- to let your guard down. A large hand on your shoulder jolts you back to reality, your eyes wide as you stare up at Shouta like a deer in headlights.

“You okay Kitten?” All you can manage as you settle your thoughts is to blink up at the man, swallowing down the lump in your throat before letting out a shaky breath.

“Let me guess. I’m home now, aren’t I?” The man stares back down at you with subtly raised eyebrows before chuckling softly.

“That’s not the reaction I was expecting, but I can’t say I’m mad about it. You’re a smart little kitty, aren’t you.” He leaves you to your thoughts and your mind begins reeling once again. You understand this is wrong, that you shouldn’t be so willing, so obedient. You also know how boring your life has been up until now. How mundane and lonely you’d been for as long as you can remember.

You’d cut ties with your family long ago, and ‘friend’ is a very loose term. Most of the people you called friends are acquaintances at best, your antisociality and trust issues meant ‘making friends’ is not on your life agenda. Somehow you knew, deep down, you wanted something like this to happen. You longed to give up control, to let someone else string you along and take the reins and let you relax, not have to worry about anything anymore. That side of you tended to make itself known through your explorative late teen years.

You’d had romantic partners before, though once anything intimate came up they all refused to associate with you anymore. They couldn’t understand your want to give up control, your need to submit. They refused to collar you ‘like an animal’. None of your partners ever understood the weight behind such a garment. This may be your chance at the relationship you’d always craved, regardless of its twisted nature.

Then there’s the logical side, the chances of you actually escaping. As a quirkless human in the presence of two trained pro heroes (assuming Hizashi is also in on this), the likelihood of you making it out is slim to nonexistent. If you somehow manage to get out, the two could easily track you down and just as easily drag you back. So, as wrong as it seems, you don’t fight it.

Shouta returns with a tray of breakfast, setting it down on your lap after you’d adjusted yourself to lean against the headboard. As he pulls back you mumble a ‘thank you’ and begin to eat, acknowledging the pang of hunger in your belly. As weird as it seems to say ‘thank you’ to your captor, you find it could be helpful even if only a little. Being polite is automatic, but it’s also a great way to make sure you don’t end up injured, or worse, dead somewhere, so for once in a long time your manners are intended. You’d gotten halfway through your meal when Shouta speaks up.

“You’re taking this really well.” He almost seems skeptical. You peer up at him as you finish the food in your mouth.

“There isn’t much use panicking. I’d only end up hurting myself. Besides, it’s not like I can get out.” You motion to the cuff around your ankle and he gives a small chuckle.

“You’re not wrong, kitten.” He leaves to let you finish breakfast, returning ten minutes later and taking your empty tray. He comes back right after, a pair of handcuffs and a blindfold in hand.

“I’m sure you need to use the bathroom.” You give a small nod, acknowledging the pressure in your bladder for the first time since you woke up. Gently, he takes your wrists and locks the cuffs around them, then holds up the blindfold before going to tie it around your head.

“These are just a precaution.” Soon you feel the cuff on your ankle fall away, and Shouta’s strong arms loop under your knees and back as he lifts you off the bed.You’re both surprised and not that he can lift you with relative ease. He is a pro hero after all. It takes less than 30 seconds for him to stop and gently place you down, taking the blindfold and cuffs off.

“I’ll be waiting just outside the door. Once you’re done, knock and I’ll take you back to bed.” You nod and he leaves, locking the door once he’s outside. Of course it locks from the outside. You take a moment to just think about your current predicament. Currently you’re locked in the house of a pro hero, being kept against your will (sort of). Your life had just taken an unexpected turn.

You knock on the door like Shouta said, and it isn’t long before you’re back on the bed with the cuff around your ankle. As he turns to leave you stop him, and he turns back to you with a quirked eyebrow.

“Can I...draw?” You didn’t know if he’d actually let you have anything, but it was worth a shot. If you were to be cooped up here you need to keep yourself occupied. With a low hum, he leaves the room and comes back with a sketch pad, pencil, and eraser.

Days come and go with either of the pros serving you three meals a day. They begin questioning your obedience, especially Hizashi. He questioned your lack of panic and how you never seemed to try to escape. Even he knows this isn’t normal. Shouta seems less skeptical, like he’d expected less of a fight than any normal, sane person would give. When Hizashi asked questions you answered truthfully. Lying is of no use to you.

“Really, I don’t mind it here. So far my life has been pretty shitty and boring, so this turn of events is mildly appreciated. Besides, you treat me relatively well, considering I’m being held captive, so I can’t say I’m upset.” You’d guessed from both your reading and their actions that they truly believed they cared about you. The chances of them hurting you are slim, so you’re able to live with them without fear.

The cuff around your ankle came off about a week in, and Shouta gave you the freedom to roam the house, though it wasn’t without warning. He held his hand out to you, an offer to help you stand, and you took it. Slowly, you swing your legs over the side of the bed and shift your weight to your feet. Your legs shake like a newborn fawn, but Shouta held you to let you stretch your legs and get comfortable walking again.

He led you out to what you assume is the dining table and sat you down, Shouta taking the seat on your right. You assume Hizashi is in the kitchen, what with the clatter and smell of food. Shouta asked what you’d been drawing, which caught you a bit off guard, but you answered anyway.

“Koi fish.” He hummed, focused on you.

“Any particular reason why?” You take a moment to think about your answer, it’s not a question you’re used to responding to.

“Well they’re gorgeous creatures. Elegant, sleek and graceful. The way they move is so mesmerizing, smooth and flawless like a flowing creek. I’ve always loved drawing koi.”

The conversation lapses into your fascination with the fish, how they somehow remind you of dragons and how the fantastical creature’s existence isn’t as far-fetched as it’s made out to be. Hizashi joins soon enough, serving dinner and listening in on the conversation.

Once you all finish eating you get comfortable on the couch, nestled between the two men. It isn’t long before you drift off to sleep, their body heat lulling you into dreamland. Shouta carries you to bed, carefully laying you down and pressing a light kiss to your temple. He stands above you, admiring your features as you sleep.

You’re gorgeous to him, a goddess in your own right. He and his blonde counterpart had started watching you mainly because you were a woman, completely alone and seemingly unarmed in a bar until the earliest hours of the morning. Neither of them could tell if you were quirkless or not, and as heroes they made sure to keep an eye on you during their weekly trip to the bar should you get into any trouble.

But eventually it became a habit to look for you, and the more they looked the farther they fell. You looked as exhausted as Shouta every time you stepped through the doors, hair just beginning to lose its style and shoulders sagged. But you were so beautiful, even in your exhausted state. Hizashi was the first to mention his infatuation to Shouta, but the raven-haired man had already figured the blonde was into you.

Soon enough they began to get antsy, constantly watching you walk out the door into the dead of night all alone. You’re just too trusting of the world outside, not taking enough precautions for a woman of your caliber. They made it their mission to make sure you were safe, and one day, take you back home where they could protect you.

Now that you’re here, it’s like a dream. Even as you sleep you’re the most beautiful thing in the world. How your lashes flutter against your cheeks, the way your lips softly part with every breath, how your chest gently rises and falls, it all makes him stare down at you in complete awe. It takes a great deal of willpower for him to tear his eyes away from you and join Hizashi in their room.

***3 months later***

A couple months have passed since you’d...moved in with the two men, and you can’t say you hate it. They’ve respected your privacy, allowing you to stay in your own room and letting you bathe yourself after refusing their attempts at persuading you to join them. Honestly it’s been nice living with them.

Though, the longer you’re with them the more thoughts begin gathering and swirling in your head. Caring thoughts, how their days progress, how they’re feeling at any point in time. And needy, dirty thoughts. Any time those pop up you make it a point to push them deep down into the farthest recesses of your brain, refusing to fuel those pesky embers.

Somewhere in the back of your mind you know what’s happening, what’s been happening. You’re no stranger to Stockholm Syndrome, having done your own minimal research on the subject a few years back. You constantly tell yourself this isn’t normal, nor is it healthy, to enjoy the company of your captors. You have to remind yourself that they had taken you from everything you knew, and even though there wasn’t much for you to love, they’d taken you from that as well.

But soon enough the illogical prevailed, because despite all of that, the two have been nothing but good to you.

In no time at all the days you spend alone in the large house are the days you find yourself missing their company, hoping they’d return sooner. You managed to dig through their clothes and pick out some of their older t-shirts, and began wearing them around the house. Their lingering scents have been a comfort as you patiently wait for them to come back. They don’t seem to mind at all, so you’re content.

As time passes you get closer with them, gravitating toward them and snuggling into either of their sides, letting them wrap an arm around you and tug you into them. You began giving kisses when they left and returned, a small peck on the cheek at the door. The first time you had engaged a kiss was a shock to both of them.

You had tugged Shouta’s sleeve and when he turned you silently grabbed his collar and yanked him down, leaving a small peck on his cheek, doing the same with Hizashi. They barely had the time to react before you dashed to your room and curled under the blankets, face heated and heart pounding like some schoolgirl who had confessed to her crush and got a positive response. That night you’d received more cuddles and kisses than normal.

The kisses became routine, and before long you all slept in the same bed. Strangely enough, life began to feel somewhat normal. The house began to feel like home.

And soon enough that schoolgirl crush manifested into something dirty, something lustful and carnal. Just as much as you long to be around them, you want desperately to feel their hands on your bare skin, mapping out the curves of your body as you writhe beneath them. You crave them and their touch. But of course you still have your pride. Dropping hints would have to suffice.

Slowly, subtly, you dress lighter, more scantily. No shorts under their t-shirts that barely cover your ass, allowing the stretched collars to drop and expose the slightest peek of skin. After a shower you walk back to the room in nothing but a towel, allowing the edge to ride up your thighs. Your tactics seemed to work, their eyes glued to the newly exposed skin, soaking in your plush thighs and soft skin. Their stares make you ache, but after weeks of nothing but lingering glances you decide to toss your pride out the window.

You have dinner ready when they walk in the door, and after everyone had eaten and showered you usher them both to the couch while you sit facing them from the coffee table. Their confusion is evident on their faces, your nervous fidgeting and reluctance to look them in the eyes didn’t help. What you’re about to bring up is embarrassing to say the least, but staying silent would be a detriment to your sanity. With a steadying breath, you meet their gaze and quietly force out your seemingly ridiculous request.

“So… I enjoy being here with you,” your fingers twist into the hem of your shirt and you swallow down the lump in your throat, “and I really appreciate that you’ve given me anything I asked for-”

“No.” Shouta’s voice suddenly cuts off your sentence.

“You can’t go outside, Kitten. I’m sorry, but that’s non-negotiable right now.” You blink dumbly at him, completely thrown off balance by his statement before you catch yourself, waving your hands frantically in front of you.

“No! Oh god, that’s not…um…. I wasn’t asking to go outside. I love being here, with you, and doing whatever but...it’s what we don’t do...that’s bothering me...just a little bit…” By now your voice is so quiet and high-pitched you wonder if they can even hear you. Hizashi, bless his heart, is just as confused as before the conversation started.

“Sunshine, you aren’t making much sense. If you think about it, there’s actually a lot we don’t do.” Shouta holds a hand up, silencing the blonde. His dark eyes drag over your body, watching the way your thighs almost imperceptibly rub together and you can’t meet his gaze. You squirm, the intensity in his eyes something you aren’t used to but it makes you hot all over. His hand comes down on his thigh twice.

“Come here, Kitty.” Slowly, you stand and walk to him, letting his hands grab your hips and pull you down to straddle his lap. A finger curls under your chin, angling your head to look Shouta in the eyes. A small smirk pulls the corner of his mouth, a moment of realization flashing across his face.

“Our little Kitty is getting needy ‘Zashi. Isn’t that right, Kitten?” Heat flooded your face, your embarrassment and arousal sending hot blood to your face and chest. You squeeze your eyes shut and nod, hoping they’d do something about the very horny state you’re in. Shouta’s hand moves to your hip again, lifting you and placing you in Hizashi’s lap before standing and walking away.

The blonde cooed at the surprised squeak you let out at the sudden movement, and you open your eyes to his wide grin. Leaning forward, he wraps his arms around your waist and presses his lips to yours in a sweet kiss. It feels nice, and you let your body melt into him and his warmth, his long fingers digging into the flesh of your lower back as he tugs you closer and a pleasant haze settles over your mind.

It’s a blissful moment shared between you, and Shouta returns just as Hizashi pulls away from the kiss. They share a look you can’t place before the former raises a hand to gently stroke your arm, leaving goosebumps in its wake. He seems conflicted, trying to mull over some sort of decision in his brain, his brows just barely drawn and jaw set. When his eyes dropped to his other hand, yours followed, to find he held a long thin black velvet box. Clearly it holds some sort of jewelry.

After a few moments he turns it to you and lifts the lid, and your heart damn near stops beating. Whether it’s from excitement or a brief flash of fear, you don’t know. These two have been watching you for much longer than just at the bar. Those few months are only the tip of the iceberg, but how they’d come to notice you would probably forever remain a mystery to you.

Right now, all that matters is that they know everything. From your failed relationships to the reason they’d all ended. They had to know, that’s the only explanation. There’s no possible way it’s pure coincidence that you now gaze down at a beautifully crafted leather collar. It’s simple, thin, black dotted sparsely with sparkling gems and a dainty metal ring centered at the front. Tentatively, you reach out and trace the leather with your fingers.

“Is this...for me?” A deep hum sounds in Shouta’s chest, and that’s answer enough for you. Shouta plucks the garment from its seat and moves behind you. The cool leather feels heavenly as he loops it around your neck, his fingers brushing your skin. Everything seemed to go quiet as you waited for something, anything, to solidify this moment.

Click.

You shudder out a breath you didn’t realize you’d been holding. Shouta tilts your head and presses his lips to yours, looping a finger through the collar and giving a gentle tug. It makes you mewl, allowing him space to slip his tongue behind your teeth. He can see your pupils dilate when he pulls away, plush lips slick with saliva, lust invading your mind. You look so needy and desperate for them, so fucking gorgeous.

Hizashi leaves a kiss on your cheek then picks you up and places you on your feet. Both men grab either of your hands, lacing their fingers with yours, and gently pull you with them to the bedroom. Hizashi begins undressing first, and you can only let your eyes drag over his bare upper body for a moment before Shouta grabs your chin and distracts you with another kiss. This one is more passionate, heated, rough as his tongue effortlessly invades and dominates your mouth. Hizashi’s voice permeates your lust-filled haze.

“Come here, baby.” Shouta pulls away and allows you to walk over to where the blonde sits naked on the edge of the bed. He motions for you to turn around and you oblige, then he grabs your hips and pulls you back to sit in his lap, your back pressed to his chest. You watch as Shouta undresses, baring his skin to you as Hizashi tasks himself with undressing you.

Your shirt is the first to be removed, a groan spilling from the blonde when he discovers you aren’t wearing a bra. He pulls you flush against his chest, peppering wet kisses down your neck and shoulders as your eyes roam over Shouta’s sculpted frame. The raven haired man makes his way over, kneeling down between your legs and reaching up to toy with your breasts, rough fingers working your nipples until they peak. Hizashi’s hands find their way down to the pouch of your stomach, grabbing at the soft pliant flesh and squishing the fat there.

You let out a low whine, feeling extremely self-conscious with his hands working at the parts of your body you hate the most. You grab at his wrists in an attempt to pull him away, but he hushes you and whispers into your ear, his breath hot on your neck.

“It’s okay, pretty baby. Let me feel you.” You will yourself to let him go, let his hands explore your body the way he wants. He keeps his hands on your belly, long fingers massaging into your skin.

“You’re so beautiful, you know that?” He’s nipping and kissing at your neck, whispering praises into your ear as he fondles all the fatty parts of you.

Shouta’s hands reach up and tug your panties down, then grip your thighs and pull them apart, exposing you to his hungry eyes. You can’t help but feel exposed, uncomfortable, as they touch and gaze at every part of yourself you had always despised. A whimper builds in your chest, tears beginning to sting your eyes and your breath shaking. Hizashi leans over and kisses your tears away as Shouta leans forward and kisses at your belly and thighs, hands working at whatever flesh he couldn’t get his lips on.

“Let us love you. All of you. You’re such a pretty kitty.” You let yourself relax, let yourself relish in the fact that these two gorgeous men are doting over your body like you’re a goddess, like they couldn’t live if they didn’t worship every one of your perfect imperfections. Though you’re far from comfortable, the initial fear subsides, allowing them full access to you.

“Good girl kitty, good girl.” Shouta whispers as he nips at your thighs, sucking little red marks into your skin. He hooks your legs over Hizashi’s, and the blonde’s fingers dip down to tease your folds, barely breaching your little hole and making you buck for more friction. A soft moan slips from your lips as he pushes two long fingers into your soaked pussy.

You rock your hips into his hand, his palm barely brushing against your clit making you mewl. Shouta focuses his attention on your breasts and belly where Hizashi left bare, kneading and kissing and licking, leaving blooming marks all over your skin. Soon you feel a knot form in your stomach, tightening and burning impossibly hot. Hizashi feels your pussy clenching around his fingers and quickens his pace, grinding his palm down against your clit hard and curling his fingers to hit that spot that has you seeing stars.

When the knot snaps you’re falling apart on Hizashi’s lap, back arched and legs shaking. You throw your head back against his shoulder and cry out, pleasure racking your body in intense waves. Hizashi keeps moving his fingers inside you, letting you ride out your high, legs trembling and toes curling with the continued stimulation.

After your release you relax back down, chest heaving with every breath. Hizashi lifts you up and lays you down on the bed, Shouta crawling up over you and kissing you sweetly. He grabs your legs and wraps them around his waist, lining up his painfully hard erection with your throbbing pussy.

“Are you ready for me kitty?” You look up at him through your lashes and nod fervently, needing him desperately despite the sensitivity. He tugs at your collar gently.

“Use your words kitty cat. Are you ready for me?” Your eyes widen slightly and you answer without any real thought.

“Yes Daddy.” Shouta growls at the name and swears under his breath, thrusting his hips forward and bottoming out all at once. The air is punched from your lungs, the stretch around his thick length almost enough to make you cum a second time. Shouta leans down and kisses at the bruises Hizashi had left on your neck, giving you some time to adjust. It only takes a few moments for your walls to stop clamping down on him.

“I’m going to move now kitty. Relax for me.” He starts slow, groaning as he watches his length slide in and out of you.

Your warmth feels so good around his cock, and he moves faster, driving his cock so deep you swear you can feel him in your throat. Hizashi lays down next to you and puts two fingers into your mouth, your tongue sliding over them, coating them in your saliva.

He pulls them out and goes to rub your clit, leaning over and placing open mouth kisses along your collarbone, sucking new bruises onto your skin. Your legs quake with the quick building pleasure, your second orgasm creeping up fast. Suddenly both men stop their movements, Shouta pulling your body flush against him and sitting up.

Lithe, cold fingers suddenly dance around your back entrance, toying with your puckered hole. A single finger pushes in and you mewl and squirm at the new sensation. A second finger works its way in, the two digits working to stretch you gently. Soon there’s a third, and when you’re relaxed the fingers are gone and replaced by the thick head of Hizashi’s cock.

“You ready, sweet thing?” You nod and whine, a little weary but ready to be full of the two men. He slowly inches his way inside, shallow thrusts sinking him deeper until his hips are flush with your ass. Both men pepper wet kisses along your shoulders, giving you time to relax, but you don’t need it. You whine, wiggle your hips in an attempt to get them to move, and they oblige.

Their initial pace is slow, letting you feel every ridge and vein as they slip in and out of you. They build up a rhythm, when one is bottomed out the other has only the tip in, and soon you’re drooling from the amount of stimulation you’re getting. Hizashi’s fingers move down to work at your clit, and just the slightest touch has you trembling. The stimulation shoves you over the edge and has you cumming hard around them, your slick dripping down your thighs. They slow their pace slightly, your holes clamping down on them and attempting to milk them dry. Hizashi’s fingers rub your clit harder, overstimulating you.

“Do you have one more for us baby? I know you can cum one more time for us.” You whine, thrashing in their arms trying to simultaneously get away and tug them closer. Tears fall down your cheeks and a familiar tension fills the pit of your stomach and Shouta leans over and bites down on your shoulder. The pain pulls you over, crying out as you clamp down on their lengths hard. Their hips stutter as they chase their own release, and they shoot rope after rope of cum into you as you ride out your own high.

They still their movements, holding you and each other close. After a few moments they pull out together, the movement making you moan and tremble. Your body goes limp and Shouta pulls you to lean against him, stroking your hair and back. You’re sobbing softly into Shouta’s shoulder, your last release washing over your body almost painfully, your bones already beginning to ache. Shouta rubs your back softly and Hizashi peppers soft kisses along your shoulders, both cooing praises in your ears.

Shouta picks you up and the three of you go over to the bathroom, where Hizashi plugs the drain and turns on the tap to fill the large tub with hot water. Shouta climbs in and sits down, still cradling you, and the slowly rising water begins to soothe you. Hizashi pulls out a tube of ointment and rubs it onto Shouta’s back, relieving the scratch marks you left on him. After tending to Shouta he unlocks your collar and sinks into the tub, leaning against you. You let the two massage you and wash you, bringing you back from the intense scene.

“You okay kitten?” Shouta rumbles into your ear, petting your hair. You nod into his shoulder and grab Hizashi’s hand, wanting to be close to the both of them. The hot water and the care of the two bring you back down to earth, and you start to feel fatigue pulling at your consciousness. Hizashi notices you drifting off and takes you from Shouta. He dries you off with a towel and locks your collar back around your neck.

“Sho, I’m going to take her to bed. When you’re ready come join us.” Shouta hums and Hizashi carries you to bed.

You lay with Hizashi and cuddle into his chest, letting him hold you and rock you as you drift off. After a few minutes you feel the bed behind you dip and look up at Shouta with half lidded eyes. He gives you a peck on the lips before nuzzling against your back. With a long, soft sigh you melt into their arms, content with the new life you’d been brought into.

#erasermic #yandere erasermic #erasermic x reader #yandere erasermic x reader #erasermic smut #erasermic mha #erasermic bnha #shouta aizawa #shouta aizawa x reader #shouta aizawa smut #hizashi yamada #hizashi yamada x reader #hizashi yamada smut #shouta aizawa mha #shouta aizawa bnha #hizashi yamada mha #hizashi yamada bnha

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emmyhem · 4 years ago

Text

everything you’re missing (c.t.h)

a/n: hi everybody, i’m back with another post. this is my first calum piece and i’m so excited to finally get it up. this is once again unedited, i’m way too tired rn. it’s also the second smut i’ve posted so that’s pretty exciting as well. yeah i don’t really have much to say right now because i’m literally exhausted, my classes are really kicking my ass. anyway i hope you all enjoy this bff!calum piece. feedback and comments are always appreciated. hope you all are doing well and are being safe. thank you - emmy <33

pairing: bff!calum hood x fem!reader

summary: a drunken text meant for your ex shows up on calum’s phone and leaves him questioning everything he’s missing out on with his best friend.

warning(s): talk of a previous bad relationship, y/n’s ex body shamed her, mentions of alcohol, insecurity, smut, cursing

word count: 4.7k

You’ve decided that 3 glasses of wine is your happy medium, but even a sip into the 4th and there’s no telling what you’ll do.

So, naturally you were finishing up your 5th glass on Friday night while angrily scrolling through your exes instagram when you got what seemed to be an incredible idea. It was simply too tempting not to, your mind was feeling hazy which made your confidence skyrocket, and you truly did just look good.

A day of pampering had left you in a black floor length silk robe with nothing but your favorite deep cherry red lingerie set underneath. Your face was bare and glowing after a refreshing and illuminating face mask, and your lips were left glossy and plump from a new scrub.

You had posed in front of the floor length mirror in your living room, giggling between snaps until you had taken the perfect shot. It was classy but provocative, the dressing gown slipping from your shoulders exposing the lace of your bra and a tasteful amount of cleavage. You had also left the bottom open, allowing a clear shot of your thighs and the curve of your ass from where you sat on your knees.

With a mischievous glint in your eyes you selected the picture into a message, typing a cheeky, “take a good look at everything you’re missing” and sending it off to your ex (or so you thought).

But you really couldn’t be blamed for your mistake, Cam and Cal were far too similar for your drunk brain to decipher the difference. You also couldn’t be blamed for the fact that you dozed off on the couch immediately after sending it, before you even had a chance to recognize your humiliating mistake.

You were awoken by the ringing of your phone at around 9:00 am, way too early for your liking. Before even registering who it was, you brought the phone to your ear and groaned a sleepy, “hello,”

“At your door.” a voice you recognized as your best friend responded.

“M’coming” you said, scooting off the couch. On your way to the door you registered that you were still scantily covered, the robe falling off of you as you walked. You clutched it around you as you swung the door open to a wide eyed, Calum Hood.

“G’morning.” he smirked, looking you up and down.

“Shh” you hushed, pulling him in by the arm. “Why in the world are you here so early?”

He lightly laughed while taking a seat at the kitchen table, eyes following you while you moped over to the fridge and pulled out two water bottles.

“Well,” he sighed as you handed him one. “I got a very interesting text last night and I figured I just had to come over and see, y’know everything I was missing.” he spoke in a teasing tone as he gestured a hand down your body.

You tugged your eyebrows together in confusion. There was something familiar about what he was saying, but not familiar enough for you to put the pieces together.

“What are you talking about?” you questioned bringing the water bottle to your lips.

Calum shrugged his shoulders, a smirk still glued to his face as he took out his phone and began looking for something. After a few seconds he extended his arm to hand you his phone. You accepted it and glanced down absentmindedly as your body slumped against the counter.

The second your eyes hit the screen it all came back to you, your mouth fell open and you straightened out, suddenly very awake, not to mention very mortified.

Calum on the other hand was buzzing. Actually, he had been ever since his phone dinged last night awakening him from his sleep. Well, buzzing and extremely, extremely sexually frustrated.

When he first opened your message and saw the picture that would now be making a regular appearance in his wet dreams, he had nearly choked on his own breath. He knew that it was most likely a drunken mistake, and while that slightly saddened him it didn’t stop his dick from plumping up at the sight, straining uncomfortably against his boxers. He seriously debated wanking to the tempting image but decided against it, thinking it would be a gross violation of your privacy since it wasn’t even meant for him. Oh how he wished it was. Unfortunately that meant he had been sporting an exceptionally sensitive halfie since then.

“Oh my god.” you groaned, sitting the phone down on the counter and covering your eyes in humiliation. “Cal I’m soooo sorry, I was drunk, and overly confident, and I meant to send this to Cam and now I’m just, I’m sorry.” you reiterated.

‘Hey, don’t apologize on my account.” he countered. “Plus, you should be thrilled you sent it to me and not that asshole, doesn’t deserve ya.”

“I know, you’re right. Doesn’t change the fact that I’m mortified though. S’bit ridiculous, get a little alcohol in my system and I have a god complex all of a sudden” you rambled, running your hands through your hair nervously.

Calum stood and pulled you into his arms, resting his chin on the top of your head.

“You think too much, y’know that?” he quipped.

You turned your head, pressing a cheek against his sweater clad chest and mumbled, “Yea I’ve been known for that.”

Calum softly chuckled at your words before pressing a chaste kiss to the top of your head and pulling apart.

“S’really no big deal, y/n.” a teasing grin plastered on his face. “Besides I can’t say I didn’t enjoy it.”

“Calum!” you scolded, swatting a hand at his arm.

He dodged your hit just in time and held his hands up in surrender before taking his seat again.

“Why'd you let that dick bother you anyway? Y’know you’re way out of his league.”

Your jaw clenched at the question, your mind wandering to every time you had come to Calum crying after your ex had done something to hurt you. Everytime he commented on your “stomach pudge” as he liked to call it, when you wore a tight dress to go out. Or when he would ask if you were really “that” hungry, even if you hadn’t eaten much at all. And each time you would feel absolutely wretched and end up sobbing in Calum’s arms, but refusing to tell him why you were so, so sad.

“He texted me the other day y’know?” you muttered under your breath, while fiddling with the coffee machine.

“Really? What’d he say?” Calum responded, watching your back with narrowed eyes.

“Uh, he saw me the other night, when we were at that bar with the guys.” you said, shaky fingers pulling out a mug.

“And?” he spoke flatly.

“It’s stupid really,” you sniffled, willing your voice not to break. “He said I put on a few pounds, that he was glad he got out when he did.” your bottom lip traitorously jutted out as you turned to face him.

“Fucking dick.” he hissed.

Calum wasn’t necessarily proud of the violent images that flashed through his mind at the thought of that asshole finding yet another way to hurt you but, the sad little quiver of your lip allowed him to reason without a doubt that they were fair.

Before you could even blink he was holding you again, arms impossibly tight around you. .

“He’s wrong, y/n. Fuck, I don’t know how to even...he’s just so wrong.” he said softly, his hand rubbing your back reassuringly.

“I know.” you whimpered, holding tears back.

He pulled back enough to look you in the eyes, arms still firm around your waist.

“No you don’t. It’s...It really fucking pisses me off that he makes you feel like this. It’s like-fuck you’re just like-” he moved his hands to cup your cheeks. “You really are gorgeous.”

Your heart fluttered at his words, and your whole body felt warm as you stared at his big brown eyes. His words felt sincere, everything about him felt so sincere.

“Thank you, Cal.”

He pulled you back into his chest, “Really wish I could just, like hug away all his bullshit.”

“M’used to it.” you mumbled.

“You don’t deserve any of it.”

“Yea, well what can you do.” you sighed, moving out of his embrace.

Calum’s eyes were still glued to you as you stirred a spoonful of sugar in your coffee.

“I hope you don’t let anything he says get to you.”

You let out a breath of exhaustion.

Confidence wasn’t something that you used to struggle with. I mean sure, there were spouts of insecurity here and there but you knew your worth, and you considered yourself pretty, hot even. That had all changed a few months into your latest relationship. First it was the backhanded compliments which quickly turned into passive comments, and then outright cruel insults. People really underestimate the toll their words take on others, especially when the person that’s making you feel so ugly and worthless, is one that you adore and who’s supposed to adore you right back, no matter what.

“I try but, he can’t just be making it all up.” you were ashamed. When did you become the girl that lets a guy affect how she sees herself? That just wasn’t you.

“He is. He’s insecure and a douche. He was probably trying to destroy your confidence to the point that you felt like you couldn’t leave him.” Calum assured. “But you’re way too strong for him, dumped his sorry ass anyway.”

You smiled gratefully at his words, taking a seat next to him.

“Yea, so strong I tried to send him half naked pictures for reassurance.”

Calum shook his head, “I wish you could see how hot you are.”

Your eyes widened at the compliment, your head dropping to avoid his stare as blood rushed to your cheeks.

“I’d be happy to reassure you whenever you want.” he continued, bumping his knee against yours under the table.

“Doesn’t count.” you dismissed, before sipping your coffee. “You're my best friend, you’re obligated to tell me I’m pretty.”

“Doesn’t mean I don’t mean it.” he muttered back quietly, his expression dropping slightly. He hated when you deflected his compliments. All he ever wanted to do was make you feel good, and you made it very difficult for him when you blocked every swing he took at the wall of insecurity that Cam had built around you. He would kill Cam if he could.

You let out an apologetic sigh, wrapping your arms around his neck and burying your face in his shoulder.

“M’sorry, you’re right. I love you for that, the only thing keeping me sane.”

Your heart squeezed as he hugged you back.

Calum was perfect, he was sweet, and funny, and quite literally your favorite person on earth. Not to mention you had been hopelessly in love with him since practically the beginning of your friendship. But as his best friend you had heard over and over just how uninterested he was in a relationship. Everytime you would ask about his love life he would just respond,

“I’m just not the boyfriend type, m’not cut out for it.” shrugging nonchalantly.

Which you thought was laughable because anyone would be lucky to have him as a boyfriend, in fact sometimes you would let yourself pretend he was yours.

Like,in a busy club with his hands on your hips, guiding you through the crowds. So close behind, you could feel each exhale on the back of your neck, as his eyes darted around the room to ensure there weren’t any potential threats to your safety, in the form of drunk overzealous flirts. Or after a night out when he got cuddly and clingy, and would find his way from the couch into your bed. You’d wake up with his cheek pressed against your chest and his arms snaked around your torso as he released soft breaths that caused goosebumps to rise on your exposed skin. You’d let yourself imagine that you had this every morning and that he would wake up any minute to smother your face in kisses and tell you he loved you. And of course, here he was again this morning being so thoughtful and kind and everything you wanted in a boyfriend. And here you were again swimming in his praises and physically having to restrain yourself from kissing him.

Begrudgingly, you pulled away and stood up.

“Gonna get changed.” you spoke.

“I’m making us breakfast.” Calum called as you walked away. You hummed in response and slipped into your room.

Once in the privacy of your own room you quickly pulled on a pair of leggings and a hoodie before scurrying to the bathroom sink and splashing cold water on your face in hopes of ridding yourself of any romantic thoughts towards your best friend.

Although you weren’t aware, Calum was doing the very same thing just a few feet away. Internally reminding himself repeatedly that it was never gonna happen with you. He wasn’t good enough to be anyone’s boyfriend, let alone yours. You didn’t want him that way and he could almost trick himself into believing that he was okay with that.

You hastily finished brushing your teeth before returning to the kitchen. You were greeted with the sight of Calum’s back, he stood over the toaster cutting an avocado and humming a song you didn’t recognize quietly to himself. He looked over his shoulder as your footsteps approached.

“Hungry?” he questioned.

“You have no idea.” you affirmed, as he fixed a plate for you both.

“Good. I was thinking we could watch something while we eat,”

“Fine with me.” you responded, hoping he wouldn’t notice the distraction laced in your voice. Your focus had easily been stolen from the conversation to how easy it was to see his back muscles flex through the thin material of his jumper.

But of course he did, it was Calum after all.

“Y’alright?” he said, handing you a plate.

“Uh, yep.” you rushed out.

“Not still thinking about Cam, are you?”

“No, not at all.” you answered honestly, walking to the couch, Calum trailing closely behind you.

“Then what’s got you all flustered?”

“You” you thought, taking a seat in the furthest corner.

“I’m not flustered.”

“Bullshit” he countered, sitting practically on top of you.

You let out a huff, and motioned to the other completely empty side of the couch.

“Is there a reason we aren’t practicing personal space right now?”

He laughed softly at your question and nuzzled closer into your side.

“Yea, you’re all pouty, looks like you need a cuddle.”

“I’m really fine Cal.” you shoved him lightly but saw no results, he just scooched in even closer and bit into his toast.

The two of you sat in silence while some newly released action movie played on your TV. Calum’s arm was wrapped around your shoulders keeping you tight to his side, and although you could’ve sworn that you had been in this exact same position hundreds of times, you felt as if this were the very first time. Every single one of your nerves were on fire and the warmth that had flooded your body was making you antsy.

Feeling overwhelmed by your senses, you allowed your eyes to flutter close with a deep inhale.

“You okay?” Calum whispered, dipping his head down slightly to reach your ear.

You opened your mouth to respond but didn’t trust your voice to protrude through your shaky exhales, settling for a subdued nod instead.

“You sure?” his words were long and drawled out, despite your eyes being closed you knew his proximity from the feeling of his breath just behind your ear.

Before you could speak up his hand secured itself just above your knee, and your muscles flexed involuntarily at the contact.

“Relax, y/n” he continued, his thumb beginning to run repeatedly over a spot on your inner knee.

Everything in your brain was screaming at you to excuse yourself, maybe even kick him out, anything to gain some space and hopefully some clarity from the cloud of sexual tension that was looming over the two of you and blurring boundaries at lightning speed. But you were essentially frozen in place, petrified that any movement would alert Calum to the way he was affecting you.

Your head lolled back to rest on his forearm which was lying behind you on the couch and finally peeled your eyes open, staring up at the ceiling.

He watched you from the corner of his eye, taking note of every rise and fall of your chest, every thick swallow of your throat.

If there was one thing Calum was well versed in, it was his ability to read you, he liked to think he knew you better than anyone else in the world. He could tell exactly how you were feeling just by watching you, your face, your breathing and he was more than shocked when he started getting the feeling you were no longer upset but something far more appealing.

Were you turned on? Right here in his presence? The thought made blood rush to his dick, which twitched in his pants when another breathy sigh passed your lips.

“What’re you thinking about, love?”

Everything in you urged you to answer honestly, just tell him the truth. “You, I’m thinking about you. I’m always thinking about you.” But you couldn’t do that, so instead you deflected.

“What’re you thinking about?” you countered, meeting his eyes.

Calum questioned his next words very carefully, debating whether or not he could recover if he was wrong about what you were feeling and you shut him down. It was pointless though, he knew he would never recover from your rejection. He also knew that spontaneous combustion wouldn’t look very good on his tombstone and that’s exactly what would happen if he spent one more minute not kissing you.

Fuck it.

“That pretty little set you had on last night.” he confessed.

That you weren’t expecting.

A quiet whine rang from your throat and you were far too affected to feel embarrassed.

And that did it, Calum was now impossibly hard in his pants, no doubt leaking precum onto his boxer briefs. He needed to get his hands on you, now.

His hand started to slowly travel up your thigh, goosebumps rising on every centimeter they passed.

“So gorgeous in red, aren’t ya y/n?”

“Cal,” you hissed when his thumb brushed the sensitivity of your inner thigh.

“Mm.” he hummed. “It’d be pretty hard fo’me to stop right now, but I will if that’s what you want. Is that what you want, love?”

He was sure he’d cry if he had to let go of you now, but he needed to hear you say it.

“No, don’t wanna stop.” you whined, turning your body flush to his.

“Whaddya want then, baby? Hm?” You could feel his every word on the flushed skin of your neck as he leaned into the crook.

“Want you.”

He could’ve came then and there.

“Then I’m all yours.” he admitted before crashing his lips on yours.

Your heart was in your stomach as his tongue entered your mouth, explorative and eager. He was too busy memorizing your taste to notice your fingers tugging at his sweater. You attempted to push it up desperate to feel his skin under your hands. You were able to pull the fabric up about halfway before they were blocked by his arms that were holding you close against him.

Calum laughed when you pulled apart from the kiss, giving him a disappointed look.

“Want it off?” he teased.

You couldn’t bother to be embarrassed when you nodded eagerly in response. He didn’t waste any time peeling the fabric off of his skin, and you were quick to lightly run a finger across the ink feather just below his collarbone.

Now it was his turn to tug on your clothes, “Level the playing field?”

You nodded, lifting your arms and allowing him to lift the sweatshirt over your head leaving your chest completely bare. Calum groaned at the sight of your tits, his hands quickly finding your waist and tugging you down to lay on your back in one swift motion.

Once you were laid out in front of him he took the opportunity to explore the new skin. His hands left a lingering warmth as they dragged across your stomach and despite the kind words and endearing demeanor that he always upheld with you, you found yourself shying under his gaze, wanting to curl away from him. As your hands began to wrap around your stomach in an attempt to cover yourself up he quickly pushed them away, locking them in place on either side of you.

“Wanna see everything baby, all of you.” he cooed in your ear before nipping at the lobe.

His kisses began to travel down your neck, sucking a few marks to your collar bones and the surrounding areas. When his fingers grazed over a fresh bruise in the dip just between your neck and shoulders you hissed lightly.

“You look so pretty marked up for me. All mine, aren’t you baby? Not Cam’s, mine. Say it.”

“Yours, Cal.” you admitted, feeling your body sink further into the couch. You had never felt drunk off of someone’s words before and the experience was leaving you sputtering, completely compliant to your best friend.

He hummed contently at your confession, his large hands gripping at your hips, before slowly peeling your leggings off.

“Y’feel so good in my hands, like you were made for me.” his thumbs poking at the soft skin, just beneath your panties.

The feeling of his hands so close to where you needed them, but not quite there was driving you crazy.

“Cal, please.” you begged.

He groaned before tugging at the cotton covering you. “Cam’s a fucking idiot, y’know that? He had the prettiest girl in the world and treated her like shit. I’d never do that, wanna worship you baby.”

It was ridiculous how overwhelmed his words were leaving you, all desperate and squirming. As his fingers met the soaked expanse of your cunt you couldn’t hold back the throaty moan it elicited.

A pornographic sigh followed close behind, one that made Calum want to pinch himself to ensure he wasn’t in the midst of a haunting dream.

“Soaked f’me darling.” he mused, running his fingers up and down your folds to completely coat you in your arousal. You whimpered at the feeling, bucking your hips up desperate for friction.

Tutting while shaking his head, he used one hand on your lower stomach to press you back down to the couch.

“Stay still for me won’t you, love?” he cooed, continuing to run his fingers over your core lightly.

When you bobbed your head up and down in agreement he lifted your leg to his mouth, pressing a kiss to your calf.

“Hm, good girl.” he praised, softly laying your leg back down.

Calum hovered above you, dipping his head down every so often to peck at your chest, his fingers still unrelenting. The knot in your lower stomach tightened every second that passed and you felt like you could scream at any second, yearning to be full.

Calum felt like he could burst any minute himself but was determined to make this experience the best of your life. He wanted to give you something to remember, a reason to want more.

Your soft moans and frustrated grunts alerted him to your neediness and he was just about ready to give in for the both of you.

“What do you need from me, baby?” he said against your shoulder before peppering kisses across your collar bones.

You could only respond with an airy moan when his fingers found your clit.

“Hm? My fingers?” You shook your head aggressively. He knew exactly what you wanted, the tease.

“No? Want my mouth?” he teased further, leaving an opened mouth kiss in between your tits.

“Cal,” you sighed. “Fuck me, please.”

He groaned at your words, nipping lightly at the skin before ridding himself of his pants.

“You’re a fucking dream, y’know that?” he praised, desperately searching for a condom in his pants. When he finally located one he held it up to you as if it were a prized possession, smiling proudly at his own preparedness.

He hastily freed himself from the constraints of his boxers and rolled the condom on, never once taking his eyes off of the blissful expression on your face.

“Ready?” he questioned, his tip lightly pressing at your entrance. You nodded and sucked in a breath, bracing yourself for the stretch, your eyes falling closed in the process.

When a few seconds went by and nothing happened you opened your eyes to find Calum staring down at you in awe.

“Cal,” you whined. “what’re you doing?”

Your words seemed to break him from his trance, he shook his head and muttered an apology to you.

“Sorry, fuck you’re pretty. You’ve got no idea how long I’ve been waiting for this.”

“Then stop waiti-” your words were cut off by a sharp hiss that couldn’t have been prevented as his length finally pressed into you.

“Fuck.” Calum groaned his head falling back. You felt too good around him, seriously he was fucked, completely ruined for you.

You felt the exact same as your silky moans filled the room. You had never been filled this good and you questioned how you had gone so long without this.

“M-move” you sighed, clenching around him.

You could hear his breath catch at the feeling and he grunted out a strained, “Need a minute.”

He held himself in place for a few more seconds until his breaths began to even out once again before pulling nearly all the way out and slamming back in.

You yelped, pulling your lip between your teeth in hopes to drown the sound.

He continued slamming into you at an unrelenting pace, taking notice of each time your eyes would roll back when he brushed against your g-spot. He could write a book about how good you looked all fucked for him.

As his thrusts grew closer together you could feel your release creeping up on you.

“Cal, need’ta cum.” you stuttered out.

His hands tightened around your hips, pulling you even closer to him as his head poked at that spot again.

“Go on baby, let go.” he encouraged, willing himself to hold out a little longer as your walls fluttered around him.

Once you had came it only took him about three more thrusts before he was painting the condom with his release, groaning your name as his hand searched for yours to intertwine them as he came down from his own high.

His body flopped next to yours on the couch, both of you struggling to fit next to each other in such a small space, not that either of you minded the close quarters.

Your fingers remained laced together as you caught your breath, Calum peppering kisses to your shoulder and mumbling praises into your skin.

“You’re an angel. God, I just- I love you.” he said, causing your head to snap in his direction.

He looked like a deer in headlights when you asked for him to repeat himself.

“I love you?” he obliged.

“Is it a question?”

“No, I’m just not used to saying it.” he admitted, vulnerability clear in his eyes.

You wanted to kiss away the worried crease in his forehead but instead pressed your lips to his, pulling apart a fraction of an inch to speak after a few seconds.

“I love you too.” you ensured.

Calum eyes widened, not expecting you to say it back, at least not so soon. He had so much he wanted to say to you but figured all of it could be summed up by another kiss to your soft lips. So he closed the distance once again, using a bit more force this time in hopes it would convey the strength of his feelings for you.

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cno-inbminor · 4 years ago

Text

iterum vivere (childe/tartaglia)

a/n: wow, it’s been fucking forever. first genshin fic featuring childe/tartaglia!!! a very huge thank you to @suspensin for reading this over and being my rock and support, and i love her so fucking much. I couldn’t have finished this without her!

plot: reincarnation and modern/uni!au ft. afab reader!traveler with she/they pronouns x childe/tartaglia

-- in which meeting childe is a bit of a dangerous game of push and pull

wc: 12.1k; angst + fluff

warnings: DOES CONTAIN IN-GAME SPOILERS (1.5? 1.6? + story quest and idek) and NSFW MENTIONS (mdni to be safe). there’s no explicit smut but thoughts do run a bit wild here and there

EDIT: Altered ChiLumi version now posted on AO3 here!

“Haven’t we met before?”

The shine in your eyes does nothing to hide your curiosity, head even tilting a little in observation. He watches them scan his face for any recognizable features, but attempts to focus on the strange, taut string of déjà vu that pulls him toward you. In a moment of absentmindedness, he had heard a faint voice call out his name from your direction. Confusion overtook him as you weren’t looking at him, but something inside his brain said that it had to be from you. And so his feet redirected his path towards your figure in the student union building, as if on a mission.

“A fucking whale, Childe?”

Oh.

“I don’t think so…?” You trail off, curiosity now replaced by perplexed feelings. “Do we have a class together?”

I think I would’ve noticed you by now if you were.

“Ah, what’s your major?” Childe asks quickly to avoid listening to the little voice in his head.

“History and anthropology, you?”

“Economics, but I’ve taken a history course for core credits. Maybe it was then?”

“With Dr. Zhong?”

“Yes!” He snaps his fingers. Part of his brain decides to usefully function and scan his memories to see if he remembers your face or head of hair in the lecture hall then. “Last year? Tuesdays and Thursdays from 10 to 11:20?”

“Actually, yeah,” you affirm in surprise. You think you would remember the relatively attractive ginger in your class, but honestly, it had all been such a blur and you were often pretty sleepy during class. Dr. Zhong didn’t quite appreciate it, but you made up for it with your exam and essay grades, as well as paying better attention in some of his other courses.

“Did you need me for anything?”

“I’d like for you to come visit and meet my family.”

He’s really not appreciating this extra voice speaking for him.

“Well…uh…” Childe stammers and looks away sheepishly, hand rubbing the back of his neck. He honestly had no reason for approaching you, and now, he just looks like a desperate idiot. Think quick, he tells himself, floundering for some shitty excuse.

“I wanted to, uh, take another history course as an elective and um, wanted to know if you had any recommendations?”

“Oh,” you blink. That’s a first. When he meets your gaze, the swirling shades of sapphire strike something deep within you. Flashes of events you can’t make out go by in the blink of an eye, but then you realize you’ve been staring for too long. Blood rushes to your cheeks because you don’t exactly want this guy to get the wrong idea from you, because how are you supposed to explain, “I’m sorry, but I think we have met before, but just a really, really long time ago, and we might’ve been more than just acquaintances because that’s what it feels like?”

“I think you’d like Teyvat Mythology,” your voice wavers on the verge of cracking. “Dr. Zhong might have a TA this time around, but Xiao’s a great teacher. Doesn’t have long, rambling anecdotes, but explains things well and gets straight to the point.”

“C-cool, I’ll look into it,” Childe replies and smiles brightly. “I’ll head out then,” jabbing a thumb over his shoulder, where he just realized he left a grouchy Scaramouche waiting by a vending machine, newly purchased Starbucks Tripleshot drink in hand. “Nice seeing you, (y/n).”

He scurries off before you both realize that you never told him your name.

“Who’s that?” Scaramouche asks, jutting his chin in your vague direction.

“Someone from my Intro to Liyuean History course last year,” Childe waves off. “Come on, let’s go before the line at the pasta bar gets too long.”

The next time you see Childe is by accident, traversing across an open field of grass that many students like to sit out on to relax with friends, sunbathe, hold events, or play casual team sports if room permits.

You had your earbuds in and were scrolling through social media when laughter rang above all other sound, causing your head to snap up and swivel around to find the source. And while it might’ve been strange to an outsider, your steps immediately slowed as you watched the man of your tiring, vivid dreams sprint in your direction, eyes pinned on a frisbee heading towards him.

He’s wearing a grey sports tank and basketball shorts, headband holding back his bangs as he makes a slight jump in the air to catch the plastic disc between his palms. His feet plant into the grass as he looks for someone to pass it to, and you watch (with embarrassment) the muscles in his throwing arm relax and tighten with practice, frisbee steadily soaring through the air in a beautiful arc towards a teammate. He then lightly jogs to get closer to his group, but then his back stiffens.

Before your instincts kick in for you to turn and bail, he looks over his shoulder and stares straight at your now stunned self.

The sole ruby earring that glints in the sunlight catches your attention, and you recall your dreams of terrifyingly dark, violet electric power, blades of water rushing toward you, and then the stomach-churning sensation of falling from great heights pours concrete into your veins—

Childe looks a little amused for having your sole focus, hand lifting up for a quick wave. And as you numbly return the greeting, your heart beats out, “Run from him.”

And so with the flight response pulsing and firing from your synapses, you abruptly speed walk away, almost breaking out into a sprint towards your dorm. You ignore his pointed, confused look, and pretend you don’t feel the two holes of imaginary fire searing into your back. It isn’t until you’re laying back in bed that you release a huge sigh of relief and pray to a deity you don’t believe in that those eyes of mirth will not haunt you tonight.

But of course, with a deity that doesn’t exist, the prayers go unanswered.

“Do you believe in any of the mythology you teach?” You ask Xiao about a few days later when you stop by his cubicle. Luckily, no one else is around for this conversation, and Xiao has always been kind enough to humor your thoughts. Granted, he might feel obligated because you had asked Dr. Zhong to be your advisor for your undergraduate Honors thesis, and Xiao was directed to be your receiver of some general questions and source of information if he wasn’t around.

A quick scan of your complexion tells Xiao everything he needs to know. Your eyes are overtaken with rumination and exhaustion, haziness clouding them as you seem to ponder over your own question. It’s not often that you ask him anything not related to your thesis or coursework.

“Perhaps there’s some sense and truth to the tales passed down,” he softly muses. “What makes you ask?”

You lift yourself to sit on the clean area next to his computer, legs slowly swaying back and forth. “It might sound crazy but...I’ve been having dreams lately. They feel too real, too natural to be anything that my mind would make up. I’ve never had the most creative imagination by any means, which is why there’s some comfort to me being a history major, but I can’t shake these.”

“So why ask me about the mythology?”

“...the Archons are there. I even dreamt that I met the Geo and Anemo Archons. And they controlled various elements, just like we were taught.”

You don’t notice that Xiao has ceased his rapid typing, fingers hovering over the keyboard before one hand removes his glasses from his face. He uses the other to rub his eyes and softly pinch the bridge of his nose before sliding the frames back on. Dark, golden amber eyes survey you as you grapple with the unfathomable possibilities of your nightly visions, at least until you shake your head in disbelief at yourself and lightly scoff.

“Who am I kidding?” You ask no one in particular. “Maybe I’ve been doing too much research and everything’s mixing together.”

“You’re ahead of schedule, if that provides any consolation.”

“Some.”

It takes Childe a grand total of one minutes and 53 seconds to sign up for Teyvat Mythology for the spring semester.

WInter in Liyue is only slightly miserable, being so close to the ocean. It’s chillier than usual on this dreary day, yet something compelled you to exit your dorm and shakily make your way to the campus coffee shop for a warm drink. Coffee, hot chocolate, you haven’t quite decided yet, but just as you let yourself bask in the warm building, familiar ginger hair and blue eyes wash away the comfort.

Or do they douse you in security?

They remind you of your recent dreams that now have shifted away from stress and violence to easygoing summer days by the oceanside, running barefoot in the sand while collecting beautifully patterned azure starconches. Sometimes, you thrust a hand towards an oversized four-leaf clover on a wooden stake with the power of wind and catch yourself in the air, soaring and looking around to find more of the little shells. Other nights, they consist of climbing steep cliffs, only to sit at the edge in the clouds with fatigue wracking through your system and marvel at the view before you.

Someone’s always with you though, ruby earring and maroon mask and cobalt blue gem hanging from the waist, sprinting with you, playfully tackling you down, pulling you up towards mountain peaks, laying their head on your shoulders, brushing their lips against your cheek--

You welcome the change of peace in those dreams, but only because they don’t leave you quite as tired the next day, as if you’d been avoiding an inescapable dark force.

Part of you wants the burning question of why this person, this man, in all his glory and brightness, affects you so fucking much when you barely even know the guy -- why looking at him sends your heart to lodge itself in your esophagus, why your lungs feel like they’re so close to being completely collapsed under the weight of his stare, why feeling like you’re trapped and caught between wanting to run towards yet away from him. It makes no sense, and you’re tired of trying to make sense of anything you don’t exactly want to remember from your dreams for some, once again, inexplicable reason.

But there’s no time to think as he quickly ambles towards you, your own feet shuffling forward to meet him in a warped reference of a distance that constitutes to “the middle” before you can stop yourself. Your shivering hasn’t quite stopped yet, and Childe seems to take notice of it.

“Pretty cold out there,” he softly states. It’s cute, the way you’re curling in on yourself to retain some warmth.

“Y-yeah, not sure why I decided I really needed something warm to drink right now,” you reply and avoid his gaze. He watches you peer over his shoulder to squint at the menu display hanging from the ceiling, seemingly contemplating on what you should get.

“How about I get yours today? My treat for your class recommendation last time.” Anything to keep you here longer. Childe doesn’t realize how much he’s missed you, which confuses him, and chooses to ignore the fact that he’d been camping himself at the study tables in the building where the history department is located in hopes of even just catching a quick glimpse of you.

“Oh, you don’t have to do that,” you immediately attempt to subvert his generous offer, hands shooting out from your jacket pockets and waving in rejection. “It was nothing.”

“Please?” Childe puts on his best puppy eyes before reaching for one of your wrists, gently tugging you to the register. “Just this once?”

You want so badly to squash the tiny flare of disappointment that erupts in your chest from the newly acquired knowledge that this was just a one time thing. Do econ majors hate to feel in debt? That they must be even with everyone, or would rather have people indebted to them than the other way around?

There’s no time to think when Childe gives the cashier his order before turning to you, and without wanting to waste anyone’s time, you rattle off your usual beverage. He’s quick in fishing out his student ID to spend some of his campus currency, shooting you a boyish grin when you pout at your half-opened wallet.

“Go take that table over there,” he says, pointing to one in the corner by some windows. “I’m gonna tell my friends to go on without me.”

“I didn’t mean to intrude or pull you away from them,” you slightly panic. The sooner you can leave, the better. Right? “You don’t need to sit with me, I was just gonna head back to my dorm.”

“I insist. Go ahead, I’ll be right there.”

Why your brain takes his orders over your own is a mystery in and of itself, because before you know it, you’re plopped down in one of the lounge seats and staring off into space, mind reeling over the last two minutes. You pretend you can’t hear the way Childe’s friends nudge his arm playfully with their shoulders, wiggling their eyebrows suggestively as Childe tries to get them to stop being nonsensical.

“You’re gonna scare them off,” he hisses at them, hands pushing at their backs so they could finally leave him to his devices.

“Not before you do!” One of them laughs and Childe groans at their antics. “All right, all right, we’ll go. They’re cute though, might steal them if you don’t make a move.”

The darkening of the aura surrounding Childe is too quick for them to fully process, not before he dampens any of their fleeting hopes with a, “Don’t even fucking think about it.”

But it disappears just as fast when his and your drinks are called out, and he gives them one last shove before retrieving your to-go cups. Childe directs all his focus towards the seat diagonally from yours as opposed to the one that’s straight across, and you’re sharply ripped away from whatever reverie you let yourself slip into.

“Thank you,” you murmur, hands cupping the drink and feeling the heat seep into your fingertips. “You really didn’t have to, it was nothing big.”

“Can you blame me for just trying to find an excuse to finally talk to you?” He asks without a skip and you can’t tell if the quickening of your heartbeat is from a looming sense of doom or excitement. Those eyes, the tiny swirls of the ocean, blue like those shells buried in the sand--

It takes three seconds too long for you to understand where he was going with in his words, and part of you feels unamused at his smooth talking. You’ve always guarded yourself against guys like Childe, devilishly handsome who know their way around language semantics, ready to pull you in and just as ready to push you away. That (possibly unfair) bias, coupled with everything else you’ve been feeling for him, sounded the alarms and set the walls up around your heart. Perhaps you need to stop wearing your heart on your sleeve, because Childe immediately retracts his forwardness.

“I’m sorry, I don’t mean to make you uncomfortable. I promise I’m not looking for anything in return and you don’t owe me anything, but I really did just...want to sit and talk and...get to know you?” Childe trails off a little towards the end. Your body loosens up and relaxes just a tiny bit, feeling bad for your snap judgment. Let the guy do something nice, don’t look into it too much, you tell yourself. It’s a coffee, not a five-course dinner.

You reach out a hand towards him, small smile across your lips, ready for his to join yours in a quick handshake. “I’m (y/n), senior history and anthropology double major. It’s nice to meet you.”

The pounding of your heart against your ribcage has nothing to do with the shimmering of his eyes, nothing to do with the fact that his hand fits with yours just right, and nothing to do with the fact that an eerily similar voice from your dreams whispers, “I love you.”

You learn a number of things about Tartaglia in the four hours, like his family members and their respective interests, which classes he did and didn’t enjoy taking, certain takes on Schnezhnayan politics, his own various hobbies, crazy accidents from the occasional college parties, and more. He’s a bit of an open book, probably telling you way more than any regular person would, and definitely more than anything you revealed during all this time. Everything you tell him seems surface level, nothing too deep. The walls are still there to protect you from the unexplainable, profound feelings his presence seems to elicit, and luckily, he doesn’t prod any further. Childe feels the resistance and respects it, which just adds more brownie points in your book, and you almost feel bad for having given so little in return.

“I wish we were taking Teyvat Myth together,” he sighs when walking you back to your dorm, hands stuffed in his pockets. His ruby earring catches the light from the sunset, the shade almost complimentary to the golden amber rays that streak across the sky. “Would’ve helped having a history major in there.”

“Is that all I am to you, an answer bank?” You jokingly ask, but he watches concerningly as you shoot your gaze to the ground, mindfully stepping over the cracks between concrete slabs.

“Of course not,” a gentle sincerity reaches you, giving you the confidence to make eye contact with him. “I’m sorry for making it sound like that, it wasn’t my intention. I really just meant it as a way of saying if the professor or TA ended up being a total bore, then well, having you would make it more fun.”

“I’m sure I’d bore you even more,” chuckling, speeding up to get away. You’re growing too comfortable in whatever atmosphere Childe has created, like an enclosed air bubble bobbing gently in the depths of the sea and letting the waves carry you both to whichever ends of the earth.

“Hey,” he interjects, hand reaching out to stop you with a soft yank of your wrist. There is no resisting force from you, feet stepping backward until he meets you eye to eye. It’s unfair in the way that he can render you motionless by standing just an inch from you, arms brushing with his head tilted closer to your own. “Seriously, I’m glad we did this today. Are you?”

No, because now I don’t know what to think, I don’t know who you are, I’m not any closer to figuring out why you terrify yet leave me so enamoured with you, I’m torn between punching and kissing you and--

“Yes,” you subconsciously answer, brain immediately short-circuiting to scold yourself. “I had fun.”

His grin, charming, devilish, is so so bright, bright enough to rival the Liyue sun that sits on the pier, on the edge of the ocean, bright enough to rival the love that your fraternal twin showers you with on a daily basis. You want time to stop right here because you’re almost sick of the voice settled deep within your heart that screams, “Don’t get comfortable, you must run from him!”

“Good. Let’s do this again?” And you nod, of course you do. Foolish you. “Don’t be a stranger!” He calls out as he turns on his heel and waves over his shoulder, hand raised in the air, and you’re suddenly transported to another scene, a less refined version of the Liyue Harbor, watching as the head of ginger hair with a red mask in a flashier attire of grey and maroon walks away from you and onto a roaring, magnificent ship; big, ivory sails only seen in books and museums. It’s the same gesture of “see you later”, and just before he turns, you blink, and you’re back to seeing your campus again.

But Childe does look back once, warm and content that you’re still standing there, watching over him, and he can’t help but think about when he can spend time with you again, because suddenly, it truly feels like there’s not enough of it anymore.

“Excuse me, what’s a Red Bull?”

The last thing, or person rather, you expect to see on the last day of finals for the fall semester, is a small boy who looks way too young to be here, tugging on the sleeve of your windbreaker. He’s at most eleven, ten maybe, but he has eerily similar characteristics, as well as an accent that doesn’t quite belong to most Liyue natives. Still gathering your bearings from your own perusing of the fridges that hold all the possible beverages a college student could consume, you kneel down until you’re at eye level with the child.

“Repeat that for me? Are you looking for a Red Bull, you say?”

“Yes!” He beams and holds out a student ID that most definitely doesn’t belong to him. “My brother asked me to grab him one because he was busy with something.”

Your eyes flit over to the top shelves where the aforementioned cans of caffeine are located, and definitely too high for someone of his height to reach. “I’ll grab one for you. Did he ask for a specific flavor?”

“Nope, he said regular. Thanks, you’re really nice! Do you know my brother?” He asks, waving the ID at you so you can get a better look at the name. That’s definitely a face you recognize, but the name leaves you confused.

“Yeah, um,” glance over again, “I know...Ajax…”

“He’s the best toy seller in the whole world!”

Somehow, it suits him much better than Childe or Tartaglia, and you’re not quite sure what toys have anything to do with the matter at hand. Speaking of hands, the little boy grabs yours in sheer delight. “Can you take me back to his room? I kinda forgot the directions he told me, and everything’s so big around here.”

“Sure, just let me buy something, too, and I’ll take you.”

“Okay!”

The cashier isn’t the least bit fazed by the little brunette at your side -- it’s always common for family members to come in around the end of semesters to pick up kids or visit, and being an open building with snacks and drinks and a stopping point of most tours, they’ve seen it all. You even let him pick out a bag of chips and a candy bar for himself for being so polite and not a complete menace, paying with your own campus currency.

Teucer, as you’ve learned in the last two minutes, likes to point out things and ask you questions. Luckily, you have answers to most of them and do your best to pad the time, enjoying the feeling of a tiny hand wrapped around three of your fingers. It’s sweet to any normal passerby, believing they’re witnessing an older sister doting on their little brother around the holidays, but to Childe, seeing the tender sweetness on your face as you nod along to whatever Teucer is rambling about to you, sets his heart aflame. He’s already constantly on the verge of wanting to hug and kiss you and never let go, but you haven’t made any indication that you could potentially like him back, and this is just torture.

“Look what they bought me!” Teucer shoves his rewards in Childe’s face as if he had extremely poor eyesight, and you can’t help but laugh a little as you set his Red Bull down on his desk, clutching your own preferred beverage while looking around his room. Finals must have gotten to him with the unusual lack of tidiness in the small space, some laundry strewn here and there, a couple boxes of eaten microwave dinners in the metal wire trash can, some textbooks left open and marked with more sticky notes than you’ve ever seen. You’d only been here once before to drop off some food that he desperately messaged you about, stuck doing a project that he just couldn’t step away from.

“Pretend you don’t see the mess,” Childe pleads, handing a kid tablet to his brother but holding on before Teucer can take it. “What do you say to our nice friend here for buying you these snacks?”

“Thank you!”

“It was nothing,” you shyly smile, ruffling his hair. “I enjoyed meeting you.”

“Wait, what’s your name again?”

“It’s (Y/n).”

“Okay, (y/n)! Wait…(y/n)..as in…”

Teucer trails off and gives a look to his brother, one that spells curiosity and trouble, before he grabs your hand and pulls you into a corner. Any movement Childe makes to leave his desk chair is immediately squashed by Teucer’s disapproval, and the older man is left to helplessly worry when you’re told to squat down so secrets can be whispered into your ear.

“He talks about you a lot whenever he calls home,” and you want to laugh at Tecuer’s attempt to sound as scandalous as possible. “All the time! I think he likes you, like, like like.”

Oh. Oh dear.

“What makes you say that?” You whisper back, indulging both yourself and him, yet also internally snickering at how troubled Childe looks.

“Sometimes, he video calls mama, but we’ll all sit around and talk, and whenever he’s talking about how he saw you or something, he just looks...happy. Really happy.”

The surprise on your face does nothing to settle Childe’s nerves and he’s about to start wringing his hands together. Whatever Teucer was telling you couldn’t be good, probably embarrassing, like the one time he unceremoniously fell on his ass while ice skating over a frozen lake, or when he tried fitting fifteen marshmallows in his mouth and nearly choked on them when their mother caught them in the act, or--

“I think he just thinks of me as a good friend,” you try to inform Teucer, not letting yourself get any semblance of hope. “Nothing more, nothing less.”

“If you say so,” Teucer pouts. But then he stops whispering and bounds over back to his brother, grabbing the tablet before plopping down on the half-made bed.

“Look, I was overconfident and thought I could execute a perfect single loop on the ice, but there was a rock and I lost balance and--”

“I wasn’t being told any stories about you falling on ice, but do tell me more,” you chuckle and take some joy in watching the blush spread across his cheeks. It’s easy to tell that he’s mentally berating himself for jumping to conclusions.

“Well, first off, thanks for buying him all that, and my drink, too,” he sighs. “I spoil him enough as it is.”

“I can see why it’s hard not to,” you smile knowingly. “So is it just him here? Where’s the rest of your family?”

“Funny story, he somehow managed to convince my parents to let him come here on his own as his first ever plane flight, so I had to pick him up yesterday from the airport. He’s flying back with me tomorrow.”

“And the RA?” You ask with an eyebrow raised.

“Ah...well...what he doesn’t know won’t hurt him? Speaking of, what was Teucer whispering to you about?”

There’s a pensiveness that overtakes you when you look at Teucer again, who’s happily playing some sort of game and completely oblivious to the rest of his surroundings. You won’t, can’t, take his words to heart, and will take them with a grain of salt at most.

“Nothing important. Although I did learn something new...Ajax?”

“Say my name -- fuck, say it, please--”

“I guess cat’s out of the bag,” he chuckles and looks away, absolutely unaware of the flare of heat that swirls in your stomach from the fleeting vision just now. “I came up with other nicknames as a kid to seem cooler, and they just stuck with me. Plus, the business world is full of people who just want something from you, or just a transactional relationship. I’d rather not give my real name to them, if you know what I mean.”

“That’s fair,” you nod and lean to sit on the edge of his desk. A thought pops into your head and you turn the words over in your head like a washing machine on the spin setting, teeth gnawing on the flesh of your bottom lip. If Teucer hadn’t been in the room, he would’ve been this close to kissing you.

“But if it’s worth anything,” your voice slowly, softly starts, cautious and wary of your thoughts. “I think...Ajax suits you best.”

Curse fate. Curse the legendary Archons. Curse karma and deities and spirits because all he wants to do right now is stand and tower over you, trap you between himself and his desk so you can’t escape, take those pretty lips between his until they’re bruised and swollen because of him, hear you call out his name in the throes of pleasure so he can finally replace his fantasies with tangible memories. The unnatural, magnetic pull that draws him to you is unbearable now -- he feels like he’ll lose the last tendrils of his sanity if he doesn’t do something.

You can’t stop him from slowly reaching out to grab one of your hands, lifting it towards him until he’s close enough for you to feel his breath ghost over your knuckles. It sends a shiver down your spine and blood is pounding in your ears because you can’t begin to fathom what he’s thinking about while doing this, even more so when his lips make contact with your skin and your breath hitches, stuck in your throat as he languidly peeks at you beneath his eyelashes with a heated gaze, then lowly confessing, “My name sounds best when you say it.”

Good heavens.

It’s difficult to swallow and keep your composure, especially when Teucer yells out in glee over, what you can assume, beating something in his game, and Childe drops your hand. But his dilated pupils don’t retract in the slightest, refusing to let you look away so that maybe, you can understand what he’s trying to convey to you. He’s taking the first step because he’s terrible and can’t contain his self-control anymore, pushing the ball into your court, ready for you to either play or exit into the sidelines.

When you do blink, there’s a vision of your naked body wrapped around another, limbs clinging desperately to a sturdy and panting frame. Lips, much like the ones that have seared themselves onto your knuckles, are at your neck and sucking, biting, before moving to your ear and laying filthy words into them that drive you closer to the edge. It all happens so fast that you feel you’ve just experienced whiplash, yet also feeling secondhand embarrassment at how lewd some of these thoughts have been.

You can’t stay here any longer.

“I-I have to go,” spills off your tongue before you can really think about it. The way the haze shatters in his eyes is heartbreaking in its own way, but there’s no time for you to explain. Your brain is in overdrive and eager to run, run, run. It detects danger on all fronts, but you muster out a, “H-have a good break, come find me next semester, mmk?”

And you’re out the door with inhuman speed. When the door clicks shut, only then does Teucer look up from his screen and frown at the lack of your presence. “Where’d they go?”

Chlide doesn’t seem to hear him, and Teucer has never seen his big brother look so sad and confused before.

He holds on to that last tendril of hope, because mark his words, he will find you come January.

After about a week at home, enjoying the festive time with his family and mildly unconcerned about next year’s courses because that was a problem for another day, Childe has his first, crazy, nonsensical dream.

At least, that’s what he tells himself when he snaps awake and his body aches with exhaustion. Not only are his joints in agony, he also feels like he’s sporting unforeseen bruises, which makes absolutely no sense because he hasn’t done anything that would warrant them, no matter how much he and his brothers do some rough-housing. His night of sleep was all consumed by flashes and scenes of weapon fighting, lucid enough to remember feeling his arms flex and wield bows and double-headed polearms and being cognizant of all the enemies??? surrounding him. They ranged from deranged looking monsters, floating beings with soulless masks, and large humans in electricity-padded armor, to behemoth machines in the sky that could leave you within an inch of your life thanks to a drill for a hand?!

But what’s even worse is that you seem to have managed a deal with Morpheus himself and infiltrated his dreams. You were there, too, sometimes fighting with him, sometimes against him, much to his dismay, and while it was nice, he just didn’t get it. Why the friendliness and hostility? Why was there an anger that overtook him when looking directly at you, parrying your blade and sending harmful arcs of water toward your figure?

Why did he relish the fear in your eyes when he darted towards you with electricity cracking through the air?

There’s an overwhelming sensation now to grab his phone to text you and apologize -- for what, he can’t fathom and there are no words to accurately convey what he’s thinking. “Hey, sorry for wanting to kill you in my dream :( “? Or “Sorry for being a friend but then stabbing you in the back, but then being nice to you again”?

And the only thing that really made sense was the serenity and contentment that would course through his veins as the two of you danced around on ivory sandy beaches, picking up shiny blue starconches and taking down more weird creatures; the breathlessness when you would fall back into the water and re-emerge to reconfirm his beliefs that you were one of the most beautiful humans he’d ever laid his eyes on; the love--

Hold the fuck up.

He doesn’t love you. He likes you a whole lot and he’s severely and deathly attracted to you, but he doesn’t love you. Your existence has only been made known to him for about two months, and he didn’t really start talking to you until three weeks in. So no matter how comfortable he feels with you, no matter how much he wishes that you were sleeping peacefully next to him so his nights wouldn’t feel so lonely, it was too early, too hasty, to say that he loves you.

“I’ve been wondering, why didn’t you bring them home?” His mother asks him out of nowhere during breakfast, all to add to this extremely tumultuous roller-coaster morning he’s been having. All he wants to do is eat his bowl of milk and cereal, then potentially go back to sleep before fulfilling his promise to go with his siblings to the nearby skating rink. It takes everything in him to not choke on his spoon of grains.

“Agreed, didn’t you mention they didn’t really have any family to go back to and that the move to Liyue was semi-permanent?” His father chimes in, laying a quick peck on his wife’s temple. “It’s never fun to spend the holidays alone.”

“They would’ve felt like they were intruding,” Childe replies quietly, stabbing his bowl a few times before scooping up another spoonful of cereal to his mouth. “I know we’re friends, but we haven’t known each other for that long, and maybe they’d be uncomfortable because that’s a lot honestly…”

“You don’t know until you try,” his mother sings and pats him on the shoulder. “We do have a guest room after all.”

“For them and their twin?”

“And quite a comfortable futon with enough blankets.”

Childe smiles fondly at his parents’ kindness. He can only imagine what this winter break would’ve been like now -- you and your twin floating around, trying to help out with certain chores, sitting by the fireplace and watching TV, huddled up with mugs of hot chocolate, playing board games with everyone and engaging in all the shenanigans…

Laughing. Loving. Grinning. Basking.

Handing over one of his hoodies to you as a sick way of torturing yet blessing himself for seeing how lovely you look in his clothes, standing silently in the doorway as you attempt to help out with mealtimes next to his mother, watching you run around in the backyard and dodging his siblings’ snowballs while lodging a few of your own -- how wonderful it all would be.

But he squashes it down as quickly as possible, because you escaped his grasp. You ran away from his advances temporarily and even though you gave him permission to seek you out come the spring semester, he worries that you might take it back. Something will wake up inside of you to keep him out of your heart and your life, and he’s not confident enough at this point to believe there’s a good chance you will come spend the holidays with him and his family next year.

“Maybe next year, ma,” he sends her a hesitant, yet somewhat broken purse of his lips that’s just the least bit curved. It tells her everything he’s thinking, and the quick patting of his cheek lets him know she understands.

Half an hour later, Childe finds himself curled up on his side under the sheets, phone in hand as he stares at a blinking cursor. It shouldn’t be so hard to send a text to convey his holiday greetings, because that’s all it is -- part of him is becoming desperate and aching for some interaction with you, even if it’s just a text sent back for conventional social pleasantries. He’ll take it for now, right?

Before he can totally chicken out, his thumbs quickly type a, “Happy Holidays, (y/n) :)”, and it’s a little embarrassing how quickly after he hits the ‘send’ button that he tosses it over his shoulder so he’s not directly looking at it anymore. His heartbeat is too quick and he prays for no phantom vibrations or phantom sound notifications to avoid any disappointment of thinking he got a reply. It was a harmless text, yet he’s treating it like he just got assigned on a mission to go and murder someone for the first time. What will he do if you never text him back? Does that mean you really don’t want to talk to him? Are you dead in a ditch somewhere? Did you change numbers and not tell him? Did your twin get all the details and make the executive decision to block his number? Will he never get a chance to talk to you again, even if it’s about something in the Teyvat Mythology class next semester? Will you--

His shoulder screams in protest when he quickly flips himself over at the text notification sound, hands shakily unlocking his phone and opening up your conversation again. His heart rate significantly decreases, reaching back to its normal pace, especially as he reads the little words on his screen.

“Happy Holidays, Ajax ^^”

There is hope.

“You’re thinking about him, aren’t you?”

You’re huddled under the comforter of your twin’s bed, phone just peeking above the edge as you stare at it with a brightness in your eyes. For the most part, you had been sulking there, apart from meals and going back to your own room to sleep, and mentally berating yourself for the way you reacted to Childe the week before.

“He just texted me to say happy holidays,” shrugging to put on a facade of indifference. It’s stupid that you’re trying to hide your feelings from your twin of all people, who could pick apart and identify your emotions in a heartbeat. A roll of his eyes lets you know that you haven’t fooled him at all.

“So you think that whatever comment he made, which was very suggestive and indicative of clearly non-platonic feelings, was just something...friendly? Remind me again how you came to that conclusion?”

“I don’t know what I was thinking!” You whine, looking around to see if there was anything you could toss at him. “It’s just, with everything, all the dreams and stupid gut feelings, I just -- I don’t know, okay?? I can’t tell you enough how much I wish I had just kissed his stupid face and see where it goes from there.”

“Okay, gross, but don’t beat yourself up. Though...I do have a good idea on how to maybe get a good reaction out of him. You wanna go to the New Years’ celebration at Xiangling’s?”

“I think she’d threaten me with a knife if I didn’t. She wanted to go shopping at some point, too.”

“I’ll drop the overprotective brother act for one night, okay? One night, just to let this happen, and for your peace of mind.”

He does a fair amount of conspiring with Xiangling, a friend they met one time at a restaurant a couple years ago, even tagging along on the shopping trip. Together, the three of you find yourself a dress that Xiangling swears would make any person drool over you, including Childe, because at the end of the day, he was a person with the possibility of being attracted to you.

You think it’s a bit silly, but honestly, what do you have to lose at this point?

At 11:57PM on New Years’ Eve, Childe is standing outside in the freezing cold with his family, arms lifting up bags of sparklers and fireworks. They’ve driven out closer to the wild like they do every year, and everybody excitedly gets lighters ready, making sure someone’s got a clock out there that tells the seconds. As the younger kids open up the packaging and argue over which one to set off first, Childe’s phone vibrates in his coat pocket.

It’s 11:58PM when he manages to fish the device out and thank himself for buying gloves that are touch-screen friendly, excited to see that there are two texts from you, the latter reading, “Happy New Year!”. It doesn’t matter that you’re a little early, but he’s mainly intrigued by the fact a photo came before it. In his mind, you’re probably curled up with your twin brother, hopefully a selfie because wow, he misses your face.

He gets something else instead, and he is so glad that it’s dark outside and the electric lamp they have is too far away from him to draw any attention.

You have your arm around your brother’s waist and another girl’s that he doesn’t recognize, but it’s a full frontal view of your outfit, one that hugs your curves beautifully and shows more cleavage than he’s ever seen from you, sophisticated and elegant, yet fun and leaving enough to the imagination. There’s a bright smile coming from all of you, and you look like you’re at someone’s house or apartment with plenty of other people milling around in the back, but they don’t matter, not when all he can focus on is you.

Gorgeous, breathtaking, arousing, mind blowing, and gods, he wishes he could teleport to Liyue at this moment, find you, and kiss you right at midnight. Fuck the fact that he doesn’t exactly believe in superstitions like, “Kissing your significant other at midnight means you’ll last forever!” but he’s willing to take the chance with it on this night and the ones after, if he’s allowed. He tries not to think too much about pinning you against the wall and letting the world dissolve -- wants to be the one with the privilege to drag down that zipper and feel his bare skin on yours, and --

As Teucer starts yelling there’s only a minute left, he instinctively locks his phone and shoves it away out of anyone’s view. The last thing he needs is his family teasing him about ogling at your photo for a straight 50 seconds, wide-eyed and pupils on the verge of dilating, the visible breath leaving his mouth just a smudge more dense and prominent than usual.

The only thing he can do to distract himself from popping a boner in front of his parents is to join in on the countdown, making sure all the fireworks are set up correctly and grabbing a sparkler for himself. He waves it around with Tonia and promises to fulfill her wishes of taking one of those pictures right as she draws a pattern in the air. Their excitement is palpable and addicting, and even though the larger fireworks set off a few seconds after midnight hits, the nostalgia fills his lungs with fond memories and future wishes that they only continue this tradition for as long as possible, and hopefully, with you at his side.

When it’s 12:04AM, you get a picture message back of Childe bundled up in a black paletot coat, matching beanie and all, a gloved hand holding a sparkler and lips curved upwards, with a caption that says, “Happy New Year’s! See you soon :)”. You show it to Xiangling and your brother, both taking it as a win in their books, although the former does tipsily protest that there should be a better indicator of Childe’s brain breaking at how amazing you look right now. Maybe she’s prophetic, because another text chimes in and the words set you aflame, as well as suggestive whoops into your ears.

It’s a simple, “You look incredible btw”.

If you didn’t want to properly savor this moment, you would’ve found the nearest shot of the strongest liquor and tossed it back with abandon. But you want to remember the warmth in your veins that wasn’t from the alcohol or the heating, the fluttering of your heartbeat, the teeth-baring grin that you couldn’t fight off, the constant re-reading of those four words -- because they’re so different from everything you had been feeling before with him, the need for protection, the need to escape. Instead, you’d like to be in his arms right now and see for yourself how he’d look at you in this moment, and if he would take any action.

You want him to. So, so bad.

Childe spends his last week at home hating the fact that you’re just sitting around somewhere in Liyue, doing whatever you’re doing, probably doing some light preparation for your last semester of classes, and he’s not there to take advantage of all this free time and hang out with you. When classes start, it’ll be busy and hectic. You still have your thesis to finish and revise, and while that won’t eat up all your time, it’s still some that he’d want to fill in with his presence if he could. He debates whether or not he should ask for your schedule and compare it with his, maybe set up meetings every other day or propose that they all eat one meal together every day. Childe’s not quite sure of what you plan to do after graduation, as it hasn’t come up in conversation yet, but either way, he’s determined to stay in contact and make things work out. Long distance isn’t ideal, but with technology now, he’ll take it.

He feels a little bad for how excited he probably looked to be leaving home, uncharacteristic for the most part. His older siblings have already gone back to their respective homes, and it’s mainly Teucer and Tonia that worry and tear up when he starts packing his belongings. Tonia finds it unfair that Teucer got to meet you first and the latter makes sure to rub it into everyone’s faces. It’s hard for Childe to sleep on the plane because he’s thrumming with excitement, yet somehow even more nervous than usual when the plane hits small bouts of turbulence, and he doesn’t seem to relax until he sets foot back on campus.

He’s here. It’s January, and you’re physically closer to him than ever in the last two weeks.

“Found you.”

On the first day of classes, you’re sitting alone with some salad greens in a bowl, poking your fork at some scraps while you watch something on your phone, earbuds in and back towards the entrance of the canteen. It would explain the unannounced entrance of the very person who’s been at the forefront of nearly every thought in the last 96 hours, his fingers gingerly removing an earbud to surprise you as best as possible, and you startle in your seat.

Your heart kicks into overdrive when he hands you back your earbud and pulls out the seat next to you, setting his own plate of food down as he plops down in his chair. But then he says nothing afterwards, instead choosing to send you a cheeky grin before digging in. You’re left to slowly phase out of your state of shock, stuck between either running away or frantically texting your twin to come and save you even though he was off on a date with Keqing.

It’s not that you weren’t elated at the fact that Childe had done exactly as you told him last month, you just weren’t...prepared? It’s a shitty excuse and a cop out -- you’re mainly just having trouble with racking your brain to find the right words. What are you supposed to say? What should you do? Is it socially acceptable to lean over and kiss him on the cheek because that’s what you’d like to impulsively do at this very second??

“So you did,” you settle and steal a roasted potato wedge from his plate. It’s his turn to be taken by surprise, but he gets over it much quicker than you do. In fact, he spears two wedges and drops them in your bowl, smiling at you as best as he can with a mouth full of food. You give them your thanks before the silence settles in again.

“Did you have a good break?” He asks before his next bite.

“I did. You?”

“It was nice. My parents said I should’ve brought you and your twin home to spend the holidays with us. Can’t say it didn’t cross my mind before finals.”

Holy shit, what? “We couldn’t intrude like that, but that’s really nice of you guys.”

“That’s okay, there’s plenty of chances to visit later.”

You tilt your head and furrow your eyebrows. “But we graduate this semester?”

Childe challenges you with one of his own eyebrows raised. “And? Are we never gonna see each other again?”

Honestly, the possibility had occurred to you. You aren’t entirely sure of Childe’s plans after graduation, and if that meant he was staying in Liyue or going back to Snezhnaya or even moving to Inazuma or Mondstat. While people preach on and on about how lasting friendships and relationships are often formed during college, you believe it’s more common to slowly drift apart as life gets busier. And if Childe moved away, or if you did, it’d be hard to consistently keep in touch with 10 hour workdays.

The thought saddens you, regardless. You like him so much and you’re glad that he was even in your life to begin with, because as unbelievable as it sounds, seeing him was almost akin to the feeling of coming home. Amidst all your nerves, your confusion, your spiraling thoughts, something deeply sated in your heart was a comfort that you found with very few people in your life whenever in his presence.

The thought of leaving and never looking back somehow doesn’t feel new -- it’s bittersweet, but the air in your lungs feels like it’s surrendered to something, like it was to be expected.

“You can’t just leave without telling me--”

“It was last minute! I had no choice!”

“You could’ve written up a message, anything--”

“Can you imagine the position you’d be in if the message got intercepted? I wouldn’t have been safe, she’d make you come after me--”

“As if you’d be any safer in Inazuma of all places! That’s the one place I can’t easily get to!”

“I can take care of myself, Childe, I don’t need you to protect me.”

“This isn’t about me protecting you, (y/n) and -- stop walking, will you?!”

“Then what is this about?” You spin on your wheel with eyes aflame. “Why are you so angry with me? It’s normal for me to disappear for weeks at a time, why was this any different?”

“Because you could’ve died!” He yells back in despair, chest heaving. Your silence is his cue to continue. “You could’ve died and I wouldn’t have known until much later. You could’ve died and all I’d ever think about were the things I never got to say to you, and how I wish I had treated every day with you like it was our last.”

It isn’t hard to tell that you’re stunned and at a complete loss for words. Childe often hides behind facades of charm and wit, and only when he is truly weak does he choose to be this vulnerable, baring his heart for you to see.

“I only have two nightmares in this world. One, my family being harmed in any way. Two, reading in a report or hearing from an agent that you’ve been captured and killed.”

“I like to think that we will.”

His hand reaches out to lay on top of yours, giving it a quick squeeze. “Well, let’s make the most of it this semester.”

Conversation afterwards is easy, filling each other in on holiday activities. Childe speaks extensively about several family traditions and you listen with rapt attention, basking in how fond he is of all of them. Even as you both bring your dishes to the return belt and leave, he immediately offers to drive you both somewhere to get boba, noticing your reluctance to part ways. But boba shops have to close, and you both have class tomorrow morning, and you’re both finding any excuse to keep talking, even if that means sitting outside your dorm building on a nearby bench.

You eventually bid each other good night’s and see you later’s, him refusing to walk away until the heavy door locks shut behind you after you swipe your student ID, and you looking over your shoulder to watch his figure disappear into the night.

True to his intentions, Childe makes great efforts to meet you at least once a day, and he can’t get enough. Each parting from you tugs and tugs at his heart, as if there’s a high possibility you’ll never want to see him again the next day, and he wouldn’t know what to do with himself. Your twin and Childe get along well for the most part, and he even meets Xiangling on one of her shifts at her regular restaurant, who sends you a salacious wink and an eyebrow wiggle over his shoulder that nearly causes you to burst from embarrassment.

February rolls over without a hitch, even if you’re a little disappointed that Childe didn’t make a move for Valentine’s Day. Granted, you two still spent time with each other and he’s so darn physically affectionate and he bought you a carnation from the event his dorm held, but you wish you had the guts to fess up and just kiss the man.

It’ll happen some day, you tell yourself. You have time before graduation.

Two days before the end of the Friday that would signal the start of Spring Break, you wake up in a cold sweat, mind reeling and head splitting, heart so so heavy, as a connection is made between your present and your dreams. Not long after, there are tears streaming silently down your face and into your open palms placed in your lap, and you sit in shock as everything comes back to you. Memories are such treasured burdens, you realize.

For the most part, you had gotten used to the dreams, choosing to take charge of what you know and feel now with Childe over succumbing to some strange neurological premonitions. Especially in your dreams when many people’s faces were blurred over and hazy, and the only things you could rely on were voices, touch, and other physical features. You thought that maybe your mind was just playing tricks by transposing Childe’s hair onto a body that was also strikingly similar to his, but for the first time last night, you could see each defining feature on his face as clear as day.

The sight of his figure arching gracefully over yours, the water arrows that appeared out of thin air, the back that protected you from some military men, the voice that said, “Hey girlie, hold still.”

And that was when you had snapped awake to your current state.

Past the initial shock and uncontrollable tears, you soon bent over as sobs wracked your chest, overwhelmed by all the emotions and the pain the memories brought you; losing your twin, finding him to only be left with even more questions after roaming for decades and decades, meeting all your loved ones throughout Mondstat and Liyue, fighting yet falling so hard for Childe, feeling the fear when facing his Foul Legacy form, hating him for Osial, loving him, breathing heavily as the tip of your blade was pointed at his neck and his own just centimeters from yours, tendrils of water inching closer and closer--

Everything makes sense now.

When you meet your twin for lunch at the cafeteria, you pay no mind to the fact that you’re in public and hug him harder than you ever have in years. He’s already a little alarmed that your eyes seem swollen and you look like finals came two months early, but when he asks what’s wrong, all he gets is a shake of your head and nothing more than, “Just a bad nightmare. I love you, y’know that?”

“I love you too?”

“Don’t sound so unsure, now let’s go and get in line before they run out of Jueyun Chili Chicken.”

Even when you meet Xiao later in the early evening to talk about your thesis, you find yourself holding back more tears just two minutes in, reminded of his past and his own life, and he’s moderately concerned, hesitantly handing you a tissue from the corner of his desk when a stray tear escapes. “Is everything okay?” He hesitantly asks, really hoping that he didn’t do anything to make you cry.

“No,” you almost wail and sniffle while dabbing at your eyes. “Sorry, it’s just been a really long day.”

Xiao’s inquisitive gaze softens, remembering how hard undergraduate life could be sometimes. Graduate school was a whole other level, but that shouldn’t discount your own personal difficulties. Plus, in all of the year and a half that he’s known you, you’ve never broken down like this before in front of him.

“You work really hard, Xiao,” you continue, and he’s not sure where this is coming from. “You’re always so helpful and willing to work with me and answer my stupid questions and like-- you practice self-care, right?”

Xiao nods as a white lie, but it seems to comfort you. Maybe too much because you pull him in for a quick and unexpected hug, and you both decide to reschedule this meeting for tomorrow.

As per usual, you wait for Childe to join you for dinner since you finished up earlier than expected. It gives you more time to think about everyone from Mondstat -- Kaeya, Diluc, Lisa, Jean, Amber...funny to think that some things never changed as you compared their past version to the ones you know now.

“Mora for your thoughts?”

There’s a peace that warms your heart when you hear Childe’s voice, one that forces you to smile at him as he sits down next to you. “Just thinking about old friends.”

“I have to admit, I’ll be a little jealous if it’s another guy taking up more space than me in that pretty brain of yours.”

What a flirt. This man isn’t good for your heart. “Who said you had any to begin with?”

He dramatically places a hand over his heart. “You wound me, (y/n). How will I ever recover?”

“You’re ridiculous,” you snicker. Childe reaches over to pinch your cheek and you bat at him in protest. Easily, he grabs one of your hands and simply pulls you towards the food lines, knowing that you’ll stop fighting back soon.

Part of it feels strange now to feel and see his hands with no leather gloves on.

“Childe,” you start halfway through your meal, continuing after he hums back in reply. “Do you believe in reincarnation?”

He freezes briefly, but recovers so quickly that if you hadn’t been watching so closely, you wouldn’t have noticed. “I think it’s neat, the idea of having past lives. Why do you ask?”

What he really wants to ask is if you’ve been having those dreams, too; if he’s starring in your nights like you have been in his.

“Just a thought, especially since you’re taking Teyvat Myth now, too.”

“Do you...do you think if there was a past life, that we knew each other?”

There’s something about the look of content on your face before you meet his gaze -- he thinks that you know more than you’re letting on but you’re holding back for some reason. He wants to know what’s going through your brain right now, why the fondness in your eyes sends a jolt through him like he’s been searching for it all his life, if you know anything about this magnetic pull between you two.

“I like to think that we knew each other well.”

Even though the first day of your returned memories was somewhat eventful, you couldn’t help but feel yourself wanting to pull back from Childe -- at least, until you can successfully compartmentalize which emotions belonged to you past self and which ones belonged to your current mindset. You didn’t quite agree with his duties and his affiliation with the Fatui back then, even if he had his reasons that did make sense, to some degree.

The killing, the threatening, so intent on stealing Rex Lapis’s Gnosis in the name of the Tsaritsa, summoning Osial as a mean to an end -- and you definitely can’t forget how stubborn he was in not listening to your protests, so caught up in his brain that you had betrayed him and sent you plummeting to a near-death experience despite his earlier promise of no intention of killing you specifically.

Everything had been toeing a faint, thin line with Childe then. Undeniable chemistry and tension, guarding yourself for yours and Paimon’s safety, slashing at Fatui agents, whispering out pleas and affirmations of “I’m yours” while riding him, sometimes having to sneak out in the mornings…

The only thing you don’t remember is how everything ends -- maybe it’ll come back to you eventually, but for now, you think you’re okay not knowing.

If Childe still doesn’t remember anything from back then, you think it’d be unfair to spend time with him in all your conflicting emotions, even when it’s spring break, where you have so much more hours in the day to be with each other than normal. Fun plans around Liyue had been made, like a two-day one-night trip to Yaoguang Shoal, and you’re this close to cancelling on him.

But he had been looking forward to it so much, even made most of the preparations for it. Who are you to rob that joy from him when it was you who couldn’t figure out your own shit? Are you self-destructing?

Perhaps.

Before you know it, you’re sitting in the passenger seat of his car, staring out the window at the scenery. Somehow, it pleased you to see that the nature of Liyue had been carefully preserved over the many centuries despite its development into the modern age. You get lost in picking apart the differences between then and now that you don’t notice how quiet you’ve fallen and Childe looks over worriedly when you show no reaction to your favorite songs playing on the stereo.

Even when he calls your name once, twice, nothing gives as you clearly have tuned everything out. So he leaves you be until there’s about half an hour left on the drive, unable to hold back and succumbing to reach over for your hand. You startle so strongly that he almost feels bad for having done it unannounced. But what’s even more disturbing is that this isn’t really the first time.

You’ve been talking to him less, often sitting quietly and staring off into another world that he can’t seem to reach. His texts are answered less frequently and with less wit and enthusiasm, so much so that he just appreciates you still show up to see him. Each time he asks if you’re okay, you always affirm that you are. He’s had a hard time believing you, but Childe believes you’ll tell him when you’re ready, surely.

It’s a little ironic yet fateful that Childe planned to bring you here, of all places. In the past, you had spent many days and nights running around in the sand with him, fighting slimes and hilichurls and collecting starconches for him. You remember laying on a large towel next to him as you both looked up into the sky, pointing out stars and constellations while sharing endless kisses away from prying, spying eyes.

“I’m sorry, I must’ve zoned out,” you sincerely apologize.

“It’s okay, I just wanna make sure you relax while we’re here. This is supposed to be a vacation.”

“You’re right,” you agree and squeeze his hand. “Let’s make the most of it before we become adults who are too busy to have fun like this again.”

And you do. Childe rented a small beach cabin (rich boys) closer to one end of the shoreline, just big enough with two bedrooms, a bathroom, and a small kitchen with a dining table. You help him bring in your bags and some groceries bought the night before, setting them down quickly so you can peer out the window again to take in the view. Childe picked a good time, too. Although it’d be a little chilly at night, the day was still warm and mainly overcast with clouds.

“What do you say we change into our swimsuits and head down to the water?”

“Sure.”

Childe hadn’t really been expecting for you to step out in a large, casual tee and gym shorts, one shoulder exposed. He might have been hoping to see a little more skin, but his mother didn’t raise a chauvinistic pervert for a son.

The light in your eyes as you both approach the water is everything he had been missing the last few days, your excitement and joy contagious. As soon as you place everything down on the sand, you kick off your flip flops and leave him behind to step into the water, giggling at feeling the waves crash over your ankles and bring sand between your toes. Childe approaches you from behind and starts smearing sunblock on the back of your neck, to which you just grin beautifully at him in thanks and he has to fight off the desire to kiss you right then and there.

You’re too caught up in embracing the ocean afterwards to feel the shrinking distance between you two, mistaking his warmth for the general spring air. It isn’t until he’s done with your shoulders that he hands you the bottle to leave you to do the rest of your body, and when you turn to thank him, he’s much closer than you remember. His eyes are gentle, holding your gaze and almost daring you to look away first.

But if there’s one thing you can place without a shred of doubt, it is the unmistakable look of love, because you had seen it many, many times before without knowing until later what it meant.

How so incredibly lucky you were to have Childe back in your life now, loving you all the same, and with no life-threatening barriers. Fate or the Archons have given you a second chance, and you’d be damned to take it for granted.

Childe welcomes your lips against his, wasting no time to bring you into his arms so you’re pressed against him as much as possible. He can’t care for the overt public display of affection because this is everything he’s wanted for months now, waiting patiently for you to give him permission to make you his. Your lips are incredibly soft and pliant against his as you first kiss him patiently, then applying more force and desperation to taste more of him. He mirrors you, one hand cradling the back of your head and the other on your neck with a thumb extended to your jawline, teeth moving to nip at your bottom lip. It’s dangerous, the way you smile against his lips, and when he sinks his teeth in deeper before pulling back, your quiet mewl nearly drives him over the edge.

But you’re in public, and this was an amazing first kiss. You two have a beach to enjoy and a fun night planned, and now that he doesn’t have to hold back on his affections, it’ll be even better.

His lips part from yours regretfully, his eyes languidly opening to meet yours. Out of the corner of his eye, he spots a blue starconch in the sand and freezes.

It’s not that he’s never seen one before, but something clicks. You. The shore. Starconches. Starry nights. His dreams. Monsters. Gods. Fighting. So much fighting. Training. His family. Dragons. You. Falling. You falling. You fighting him. Yelling. Kissing. Loving. Chasing. Him chasing you before you disappear at a teleport waypoint that somehow you only can operate. The abyss. Your twin.

Oh, Archons.

“ -ou okay, Ajax? Ajax?”

He snaps to look at you again. How does he go about this? How does he ask?

“(Y/n)...have you ever heard of the Fatui Harbingers?”

He has to admit that it’s a bit amazing to be able to identify all the emotions that cross your complexion, from curiosity to realization to conflicted. You’re actively trying to piece everything together without revealing too much on the off-chance that you’re wrong, that Childe hasn’t regained his memories and is just asking about something from class randomly and completely out of the blue.

Wait.

“You haven’t reached that material yet in class,” you whisper, heart in your throat at the realization. Could it really be…

“I was once Tartaglia, eleventh Harbinger of the Fatui, who possessed a Delusion and used my Foul Legacy Transformation with you several times,” he murmurs back, tucking a stray tendril behind your ear. “Is it too late to apologize again for summoning an ancient god and letting you fall about five floors with no warning?”

He should’ve been prepared for you wrapping your arms around his neck, pulling him in for a tight embrace. “No, never, but I spent weeks after kicking your ass so you’ve been long forgiven.”

Childe burrows his face into your neck, breathing in your scent and basking in this moment. There was so much to talk about, but you two arguably had more time in the world than ever with nothing holding you back. There was no impending war looming over, no one on the run, no opposing forces. His silent wish for a different life with you seems to have been answered finally. If running into you had been the event to set everything in motion, he only wishes he’d done so earlier.

All that matters now is you’re here together in this plane of existence, given a chance to love again, and experience everything you couldn't before.

As written in the stars, take my soul for it is forever yours.

fin

#childe x reader #tartaglia x reader #genshin impact x reader #genshin scenarios #genshin impact scenarios #genshin imagines #childe #tartaglia #childe angst #genshin impact #genshin angst #genshin impact angst #this fic maybe took two years off my life

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madametrashbin · 3 years ago

Text

Blissful Relief

Modern Day life is stressful (no one can tell me otherwise), and as someone who will practically deflate upon suddenly having nothing to do and nothing important going on in the future (because being isekai'd means all regular world plans for life are cancelled), I will not hesitate to sleep like the dead because I'm not on a tight schedule now.

(Two posts in a Day?? What have I become?!)

A.K.A, I make an excuse to write a Lazy Nocturnal God!Darling who will abuse the cult pampering system... because that is what I would do without hesitation when I’m free from Modern Day duties that eat away at my health and sanity bit by bit with every hour I spend working like a mindless zombie from dawn to dusk, juggling home life that is filled with bothersome troubles that never change.

I’m also a night owl, caused by both insomnia and because it is the quietest hour that I cannot help but want to relish in since my life is filled with so much loud noise it gives me daily migraines... but of course, habits are formed from repetition and I will always wake up at 4-6am like a dumbass thus suffer the consequences the next morning.

Uhh... and I guess there might be OOC stuff?? Characterization who? Also Self-Indulgent again?? Super Self-Indulgent??? Letmeenjoysleepingandbeinganocturnalcreatureplease--

Morning tends to consist of Zhongli coming into your room, leaving the tray of breakfast he prepared on the coffee table near the sofa in your room before he walks over to kneel beside the bed where you're happily dozing off on, a hand moving to gently rest on the small of your back to rub small circles with his thumb. He’s softly smiling the whole time, looking at you with such adoration and fondness with how relaxed you were. As much as he wants to let you sleep in, he knows what would happen if a mortal body doesn’t move that much on a daily basis.

He'll try get you to wake up without being too loud, and if you ask for affection (kisses in particular, because I’m an affection and touch starved bastard), he will give it to you without hesitation and pepper your face in adoring kisses before carrying you off to the sofa so you could eat. He will feed you himself if you’re still too sluggish.

Will also put you in his lap if you’re nodding off, mostly to prevent you from hurting yourself (and because he enjoys the close proximity, if you allow it).

On rare occasions, Childe will be the one to wake you up in the morning instead whenever Zhongli is busy, letting you snuggle in bed a while longer if you want a few extra minutes before smothering you in his affections as he whisks you off from bed to get ready for the day and drop you off in the kitchen where breakfast is waiting on the table.

He will feed you himself if you're still drowsy, looking at you while cooing as though you are the most precious little thing this world has ever given life to (and to be fair, you are the most precious person to him with his family).

Will give you more cheek kisses if you’re still half-asleep, or in-between spoonfuls as a way to let you know you’re doing great... and because why not. It’s a rare moment to have, since Zhongli does hog a lot of your time.

Noon/Afternoon usually has Venti to keep watch over you if you ever choose to nap somewhere random around the teapot outdoors, or somewhere out in the wilds of Teyvat where the weather is just right and the surroundings are generally quiet. If you were outside of the teapot, you’d also have either Kaeya, Xiao or Kazuha to accompany the two of you depending on where you are for extra protection (per Zhongli’s safety precaution).

Venti will hum a song, and maybe strum a calming tune while you nap, happily basking in the gentle breeze and warm sunlight as the day goes by in a very peaceful and quiet manner. If lunch time comes around, he’ll try to wake you up as gently as possible, but finds it difficult to disturb you when you look so comfortable and peaceful right now. (And usually, this has you missing out on lunch if Zhongli is too busy to check up on you. Don't worry though, he'll make sure the packed lunch is empty before the old man drops by and that you did eat something.)

Kaeya will take the chance to cuddle with you, usually keeping you between his legs while you're using his chest as a pillow as your head is tucked in the crook of his neck. He's going to keep a loose hold on you, arms wrapped around your waist while occasionally shifting in case you're uncomfortable. He's smiling the whole time because you're so cute when you sleep like this. (Will occasionally give you kisses on the crown of your head if you don't mind it. Man wants to spoil you with so much love if you allow him to.)

Xiao is 100% attentive to all things in the surrounding, wanting to keep you safe from all potential dangers and will not relax while you're in such a vulnerable state. He will, however, melt when you sleepily call for his name while lazily reaching for him in such a lazy, but cute manner. Just like that, he's right by your side, asking for whatever you need. He's still on guard, but whatever you need, he will be there to provide... kisses and snuggles included, even if he’s struggling to be open about it.

Kazuha would be smiling serenely, occasionally brushing the hair off your face if it gets in the way of giving you proper sleep. He would take care of problems that may arise before it reaches you, and if you ever have trouble trying to be comfortable, he’ll let you lay your head on his lap while he gently pets your head in such a soothing manner that the nap turns into full on sleep... his legs might go numb, but he just couldn’t wake you up when you looked so peaceful sleeping right there.

Sayu will always accompany you when you’re in Inazuma, mostly because she could find an excuse to sleep with you around when you are getting ready to nap. She’ll be quick to defend you though, because if you get hurt, she’ll lose that excuse and she’ll struggle to find peace to sleep for a while without having people tailing after her.

Dusk/Evening you’re decently awake (or rather, barely awake), Zhongli’s not letting you sleep anymore until later into the night. Ei would keep you company, the time when it’s not so busy for her as things settle down and allow her to spend time with you. She’s honestly just internally squealing when you end up holding onto her hand or sleeve if you’re too groggy to walk by yourself and properly guide your own feet.

Sometimes the Kamisato Clan would be the ones to accompany you, per Ei/Raiden Shogun’s orders. Ayaka used to be on-guard (because how did someone who was barely standing on their own two feet turn the Raiden Shogun into some excitable puppy??) when she first met you, but she got over it after realizing you’re not a bad person after spending enough time with you to see it.

Thoma sometimes coddles you, knowing well enough that you were just tired from the stress of the daily life you used to have when you told him once during a day when he was left to take care of you... He does his best to make sure you were enjoying yourself in the city, keeping a watchful eye in case you’d trip on your own feet.

On rare occasions when even the Kamisato Clan is busy, Kujou Sara would be the one to care for you... as foreign as it was in the beginning, because you’re so idle and pretty sluggish most of the time, but she grew to find these times relaxing. Of course, she is ever watchful for all problems, and when you were awake enough, would be helpful with your foreknowledge if you do remember everything well enough.

When Night falls upon Teyvat, you are fully awake, if only for a while until you grow exhausted again. In these moments, they would all try to spend time with you and gain more of your attention... but aside from that, you would often take strolls on Watatsumi Island, if only because you do sincerely enjoy the scenery the island had during the night... but other times, you would either take a stroll at Starsnatch Cliff or Qingce Village.

Kokomi would be with you, walking alongside you while she admires the sight of your relaxed, fully awake expressions that mostly appears at night. She would keep each of these moments to her heart, knowing that if her God loved Watatsumi as it is, then all her efforts into protecting it was worth it... plus, there was something nice just knowing a God like you enjoying the natural sight of her home while taking a nightly stroll.

Gorou trails behind you like a puppy, basking in the attention you give him and will always be ready to defend you. When you talk, he is absolutely silent, wanting to hear your voice in its more clearer form. He will not be happy if someone interrupts you, definitely will snarl at them if you don’t keep him in check... but aside from that, he will stick close to your side while you’re at Watatsumi Island as your guard with Kokomi.

Diluc will be by your side during the night when you’re in Mondstadt, always looking away when your gaze is directed towards him but otherwise would observe you closely... since he often sees you when you weren’t fully awake. He enjoys seeing this side of you more, and while he does find your sleepy self to be adorable, he likes knowing that you’re aware of everything... It gives him a peace of mind when you do acknowledge his efforts.

Midnight rings clear into the night, the clarity of your mind would return into its sleepy state. You would return back to the Teapot and get ready for bed, tucked in comfortably by one of your acolytes before you slumber until morning rises once more and repeat your day... Sometimes, if you’ve relaxed enough, you might be fully awake for the whole day.

Of course, that is a rare moment that might not always happen, but if you were truly awake for a whole day, none of your acolytes are going to miss this chance and might fight to have your full attention if you don’t give them the satisfactory amount, unless you put your foot down and make sure they behave.

Aside from that, your cult will always be there for you, ready to take care of you and give you all the affection you want.

#self aware genshin #yandere genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader #I don't know how to self-care #I'll just give myself this and share it to everyone #*wheezes from stress*#I should sleep #but brain got 50+ ideas #skjsksjksjskj #I had this in my drafts since the Greeting post lmao #Finally done with this #Even if I don't really like how it ended #But brain is dead so this is all I can do for now #Not going to revise this

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ks-dreams-fantasies · 4 years ago

Note

I don’t know if you’re taking requests or not and I don’t want to stress you out so it’s ok if you don’t want to do this but could you maybe write a fic where vinnie takes care of the reader when she’s sick because the one where the reader took care of vinnie was so cute

"You'll get sick" - Vinnie Hacker

Hey guys, so sorry I’ve been MIA, I hope you can forgive me, but here’s a cute Vinnie fluff. After writing about Vinnie being sick, I got a lot of request to do another one, this time exchanging the roles. I feel like Vinnie would be such a simp and he would do everything in his power to make his girl feel better. Hope you enjoy 😘

Warning : None

Word Count : 1.1k

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The sound of your phone ringing woke you up, making you growl lightly. You had barely 3 hours of sleep into your system since you weren’t successful to have a good night sleep last night due to the fact that you were sick.

You tossed and turned all night trying to get comfortable, but your body was so sore you couldn’t find a position that would allow you to fall asleep. Your runny nose and your dry cough didn’t help either. Your new kitten had woken you up 30 minutes after you finally were able to fell asleep and now it was Vinnie requesting to Facetime you. You extended your hand, reaching for your phone answering the call

‘Hey baby” Vinnie said smiling widely ‘Where are you? Let me see your face” you hear him chuckle lightly as you growl. You moved the phone closer towards your head, finally showing your face to your boyfriend. He couldn’t see you properly since the curtains kept your room dark.

‘What do you want?” you asked groggily, tossing in your bed slowly, your kitten looking at you.

“Whoa, someone’s in a bad mood. What are you still doing in your bed? I’m usually the one sleeping in late, you’re the early bird” he said teasingly

“I think I’m sick” you replied, coughing, moaning softly

“Awnnn poor baby” he pouted, making your inside warm from how cute he was being “I’ll be right over, love you”

“No baby, I don’t want you to get si-” you didn’t get to finish your sentence as Vinnie had already hung up the phone. You sighed at the fact he didn’t want to listen to you. Vinnie had always been there for you, and he was super affectionate, giving you all his attention when you needed it. He hated to see you get hurt or not feeling good, so he always made sure he could be there to help you get through it.

About a little bit more than half an hour after his call, you could hear your kitten meow asking to be fed. You groaned, getting up from your bed, walking slowly to the kitchen where the kitty bowls were. As you turned on the faucet, you heard the giggle of keys in the door, indicating Vinnie had arrived. Hearing the water running made him turn his head towards you.

“Baby, what are you doing up? You should be in bed” he said coming towards you, dropping two bags on the counter tops.

“No Vin, you’ll get sick” you responded stepping away from him before he grabbed your arm gently, bringing you closer to him as one of his hand went to your face, putting the strand of hair that felt on your face, behind your ear.

“I don’t care” he shrugged making you shake your head lightly “Now let’s get you back into bed, I bought a bunch of stuff to help you get better” he said stepping towards the bags as you coughed.

“Baby you shouldn’t have” you pouted before yawning, Vinnie walked back towards you taking your hands in his before smiling down at you.

“What about I run you a nice bath so you can relax and after that I’ll rub your feet with some Vicks and then we can cuddle.” He said as you smiled “How does that sound beautiful?” he asked, caressing your cheek

“I don’t deserve you, you’re too good to me” you whispered as Vinnie placed a small peck on your chapped lips. He grabbed you hand and lead you towards the bathroom, lifting you up, your body resting on the counter. He turned on the water, filling the bath and adding a eucalyptus scented bath bomb.

“Will you join me?” you asked pleading him with a small pout

“Of course, baby, let me help you.” He put you down, the two of you discarding of your clothes as he helped you get in the hot water. You both sat down, comfortably, your back resting on his chest as he pressed his body closer to yours. You felt yourself relax in his arms as he caressed your shoulder lightly. Later, you turned around so that Vinnie could rub your feet. It felt like heaven. He was always so careful and caring, you couldn’t help but smile at him.

“I love you” you said softly

“I love you too baby” he responded smiling down at you

You’ve sat in the tub for another 30 minutes before Vinnie got out, asking for you to wait before getting out. He came back a few minutes later fully dressing with some extra clothes of his in his hands.

“Here you go baby, I put the clothes in the dryer so you could stay warm” he said putting some joggers and baggy shirt on the counter before helping you out of the water, drying you off with a hot towel. You got dressed and went back into your room, where Vinnie had lit up a few candles, he had put on one of your favorite movies and a bowl of soup was waiting on a tray along with some medicine on your bedside table.

“Vin, you’re the sweetest, I-“

“Shhh baby, come on get in bed so we can cuddle” he said sweetly as he cut you off. You got into the covers, Vinnie handing you your soup before getting in himself.

Once you finished eating, you wrapped your arms around your boyfriend’s torso and he put his arms around your body, pulling you closer. The warmth of his body consuming and comforting you. You continued watching your movie in silence and soon enough Vinnie could hear you snore slightly, indicating you had fell asleep.

He chuckled before kissing your forehead sweetly. He felt like the luckiest guy in the world. You were always so nice to him, so it was no question for him to do the same for you. He loved taking care of you and making sure you were alright and happy.

He felt your kitty jump on your bed, making its way towards your head laying down next to you on the pillow. The sight was so cute that Vinnie decided to snap a quick picture of the three of you, posting it on social media.

Taking care of my sleepy girls today

After posting it, his DM’s were filled with messages of girls in awe, envying and wanting to be you. But Vinnie didn’t care about them because he only had eyes for you. He felt you move a little bit, tightening your grip around his body, still asleep. He smiled sweetly before kissing the top of your head.

“I love you” he whispered before falling asleep next to you.

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Thank you for reading

Hope you like it, let me know what you think

-K

Taglist: @chesca-791, @pearlkitten33

#vinnie hacker fluff #vinnie hacker x reader #vinnie hacker #vinnie x reader #vinnie hacker imagine #vinnie hacker x you #vinnie imagine #vinnie imagines #vinnie #vhackerr

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beauvibaby · 3 years ago

Text

Purple and Yellow – j.oleksiak

• Jamie Oleksiak goes through heartbreak and challenges along with his daughter but then he meets a woman who seems to catch both their hearts •

a/n: ok this is NOT proof read at all I’m sorry but I knew if I went back and did that I’d end up hating it and not wanting to post it but I know y’all wanted it so here you go!

Word Count: 6.1k

Jamie knew he was going to Seattle, and he’d be lying if he said the proposition didn’t excite him, but once his name was inked on that paper, reality came crashing in. He had to up and move his daughter, she was only three, maybe it wouldn’t be that hard. But who was he kidding, everything is hard with a three year old. And how would he explain that they wouldn’t be able to visit mommy every weekend, just like they did every weekend since. That’s all that plagued his mind as he drove home from the airport, Ivy was waiting for him, but he knew she’d succumb to her sleepiness before he could get there. His parents already texting him with a picture of her half asleep on the couch.

Then, the cars on the other side of the road slammed on their brakes, the sound of tires spinning out made everything come rushing back.

“Is this the father of Ivy Oleksiak?” Jamie didn’t even have a chance to speak before the words came across the phone, “yes, who’s speaking?” Jamie replied, heart rate picking up at the soft sigh the woman let out. “Your daughter and Miss Cora Hadley were brought into Medical City from a car accident scene.” All she said were those words before he was rushing to his feet, “are they ok?” He asked quickly, never getting a pair of shoes on so quickly in his life. “Sir, I’m not–“ “Bullshit! Is my baby and my fiancé ok?” He snapped, based on the way she whimpered, a rather young woman on the other end of the line. “Your daughter will be fine, just some scratches, the car seat did it’s job.” She spoke slowly, her breath hitching. “I think it’s best you get here as quickly as possible.” She spoke carefully, and in that moment Jamie’s heart fell to his feet like an anchor, he could feel his stomach twisting and his eyes burning. He knew what those words meant. Then he thought of Ivy and that snapped him out of his daze, he had to get there, now.

Jamie pulled into his driveway safely this night, parking beside his parents car, a sigh escaping his lips, forcing the terrible memories from two and a half years ago away. He gathered his bags, and lugged them inside, smiling at his family all asleep in the living room. That made him forget that oh so familiar ache in his chest just a little bit more. He put his bags in the corner, those could wait, but right now all he needed was to hold his baby girl. He scooped Ivy up, smiling as she fluttered her eyes open just enough to see him. “Daddy.” She murmured, “hi bug.” He inhaled the scent of her toddler shampoo, his mom always taking care of her hair the best, brushing the detangler through the unruly hair she got from her father. “Sleep with you.” Ivy whined when he started heading for her room, normally he didn’t give in, not wanting her to be dependent on him to sleep, but he needed her tonight too. “Just tonight princess.” He gave in, bringing her to his room with him, where she fell asleep instantly when he placed her on the plush bed.

Jamie laid awake, staring at the ceiling for a little while, thinking of how he would tell Ivy about having to move. “I hope you’re proud of me.” He whispered out, his tears staying pooled in his eyes as he forced himself to calm down. “Sleep daddy.” Ivy complained, nuzzling closer to him. “Hold me.”

“Jamie.” Cora whispered, hoping he was awake despite the late hour, he grunted in response, being a light sleeper ever since he found out Cora was pregnant. “Hold me.” She demanded with a light tone, her back aching and stomach bulging as Ivy kicked around in there. Jamie blindly opened his arms for her, letting her settle into his chest. “Always.” He murmured, already half asleep as she sighed in content.

“Come here baby girl.” Jamie murmured at Ivy, letting her rest her head upon his chest, Ivy was a very cuddly little girl, the second she was comfortable with you, she’d be sitting in your lap and telling you stories and anything to be touching you. It was one of Jamie’s favorite things, especially when he came home from a roadie and all she wanted was to be held by him.

***

“Daddy!” Ivy called, she managed to climb onto the bathroom counter to brush her teeth but now she was too scared to get down, “daddy!” She shrieked again, Jamie’s eyes fluttered open as he quickly took in his surroundings, “daddy, I stuck!” Ivy called, this time sounding annoyed by his lack of response. He threw the blanket off as he knew where she was stuck, this was a common occurrence. He appeared in the bathroom doorway, arms crossed over his chest, “and just what do you think you’re doing?” Jamie asked his daughter as she made grabby hands for him, she grinned brightly at him, “I brushed my teeth!” She answered in a duh tone, she grabbed his face once he scooped her up, kissing the tip of his nose, and he the same to her, “I’m very happy you brushed your teeth, Ivy, but you know you’re not supposed to get on the counter, that’s why we got you a stool, remember?” He explained, for easily the tenth time in the past month. “I know.” She huffed, dramatically pushing her hair back, making Jamie chuckle as he walked down the stairs, hearing his parents talking in the kitchen.

“Well, good morning sleepy heads.” Alison teased as Ivy gasped at the sight of pancakes on the counter, Jamie shook his head with a smile, placing her on the seat beside his dad, “I’ll make you a special plate.” Richard quipped to the little girl, which really just meant drawing a smiley face on it with whip cream. “Thanks mom.” Jamie gave his mom a kiss on the cheek before shuffling around to get his coffee, desperately needing the sleep kicked out of his system. “When are you going to tell her?” Alison asked, taking a small bite of her food, giving her son the side eye when he hesitated. “Today.” He gave in, knowing he absolutely had to start packing now, otherwise it would never be done in time. “So, Ivy, do you have any plans for today?” Alison shifted her attention to her granddaughter, figuring they could take her out to do something so he could get more done. “Gonna go see momma!” She cheered, some syrup smeared around her mouth.

Jamie froze, it was Saturday already, he checked his phone and felt humiliated that he had forgotten his promise to take Ivy to the cemetery. Evidently the panic was written across his face when both his parents stared at him. “Why don’t grandma and I bring you? We haven’t been there in a while.” Richard offered, rubbing Ivy’s back when she looked to Jamie for permission. “I think that would be nice, right baby?” Jamie finally found his voice, and Ivy nodded brightly, anytime she got with her grandparents was cherished. “Daddy coming to?” She asked, tilting her head as he sipped on his coffee, “I’ve got some work to do, alright, I’ll go next time.” He assured her, shooting his dad a thankful look as he quickly changed the subject before she could pester on any further.

“Ivy, I need to talk to you.” Jamie announced, he couldn’t wait any longer, he had to do it and be done. Alison nearly choked on her coffee and Richard looked at his empty plate like it was suddenly the most interesting thing. Ivy nodded, munching away on her pancakes, not understanding the severity of what was about to be said.

Jamie cleared his throat and pulled out the chair beside her, “you know how I had to go away to this new place for work, yeah?” He reminded her, “Seattle.” He said, and she nodded, “Seattle.” She repeated, not entirely perfect but good enough. “I got a job over there.” He spoke, waiting to see what she thought. “Hockey?” She asked, confusion lacing her tone. “Yes, still hockey.” Jamie chuckled softly, “it’s with a new team.” He paused, glancing away for a second, “we have to move there.” He concluded. Ivy nodded slowly, “new house?” She asked, she might be young, but she knew that moving meant not in this house. “Yeah, new house, new city, new people.” Jamie explained, panicking when she went wide eyed, “what about uncle Ro-Ro?” Ivy asked, referring to Miro, she was closest to the young defenseman as she always saw him beside her dad on the ice. The nickname had been dubbed upon him when she was learning to speak and liked to repeat things. “We can visit, baby.” Jamie spoke softly, heart breaking as she began to sniffle. He could practically see the wheels turning in her head, he knew the realization was coming. “But Momma!” She sobbed.

And that completely shattered his heart.

“I know.” He picked her up, feeling her sob into his neck, “momma.” She whimpered, though she didn’t remember her, Jamie made sure to keep her an important part of her life. Ivy didn’t know that she loved going to a gravestone that much until this moment. “Hey, look at me, bug.” Jamie demanded gently, situating her to be in front of him. He sat her on the countertop and stood in front of her, “momma will always be with us, right? Isn’t that what I always say?” He explained to her. Ivy nodded slowly, she was so young but always acting older, trying to wrap her head around this. “Yeah.” She mumbled sheepishly, cheeks red and eyes puffy, she felt shy under the gaze of her grandparents. “It’s alright, daddy’s sad too.” He assured her, lowering his head to be eye level with her. She stared into his eyes, reminding him so much of Cora in that moment, and once again she kissed the tip of his nose. “No sad daddy.” She demanded, drumming her fingers on his cheek. He pecked her forehead, “alright baby.” He agreed, if she could do it, so could he, right?

***

Ivy slept the whole plane ride, which is what Jamie was hoping for as they would be meeting the moving truck at the new house, plenty of things to be done asap.

“Come on Ivy.” Jamie mumbled, carrying her off the plane as she groggily woke up, looking around slightly confused until she remembered what was going on today. “Daddy, Seattle?” She asked, lifting her head from his shoulder, he chuckled, lowering her so she wasn’t so high up on his chest. “Yeah, Seattle baby.” He assured her, her pigtails bouncing as she looked around rapidly. He smiled at her reaction to the airport alone.

“What do you think, Ivy?” Jamie asked, raising his eyebrows as the three year old spun to face him. “Love it!” She squealed, her room was twice as big in this place than her bedroom in Dallas, and Jamie told her she could pick whatever color (within reason) to have her walls painted. Of course she would love it here. Jamie looked around their new-but-empty-house one more time, sighing as he could picture Ivy growing older in this house.

Time to make it a home.

“Hi.” Ivy grinned up at one of the movers as he placed a stack of boxes in her room, Jamie just being outside the door heard her speaking, he raised an eyebrow waiting to hear the guy speak. “Hello.” The young guy spoke sweetly, chuckling at the little girl. “I’m three.” She spoke, “how old are you?” She asked, Jamie held in a snicker as he walked in. “Ivy, leave him alone, bug.” He laughed softly, the guy taking it as his excuse to go get more boxes. “Ugh.” She huffed, flopping down on her bed dramatically, Jamie rolled his eyes, looking around. “What color do you want?” He asked the opinionated little girl, he sat beside her, smiling as she stood next to him, being eye level with him. “Hmm, purple!” She gasped, looking around the currently beige room, Jamie nodded slowly, “light purple.” He countered, knowing she would want to choose the darkest shade. “Fine.” She giggled, “we can go tomorrow, alright? Today we need to focus on finding all your stuff.” He tickled her sides.

***

Ivy was tugging on Jamie’s hand, somehow spotting the paint section quicker than he could. “Slow down!” He laughed heartily, his daughter shooting him a glare as he purposely slowed his feet down. He hoisted Ivy up to see the purple swatches along the top row, she reached for a dark one, just like Jamie knew she would. He sighed, “Ivy, we agreed on light purple, what about this one?” He offered, grabbing a lavender type color, she grunted in disgust, shaking her head dramatically, her blonde curls hitting his face. “Love this one.” She pouted, holding it in front of his face.

Jamie held in a sigh as you walked past him, stopping to look at paint swatches as well. “What about this one?” Jamie compromised, it was darker than he wanted to go, but still light enough to not feel like a dungeon. Ivy’s lip began to quiver, quickly catching both Jamie and the woman’s attention. “Ivy.” Jamie sighed softly, you intervened, “you know, I wanted a dark purple room when I was your age too.” You spoke to Ivy, catching her attention as she lifted her head, Jamie shifting slightly, giving you a smile. “My dad wouldn’t let me do it.” You made a face, getting a giggle out of Ivy, “he was right though, but guess what we compromised?” You mused, holding your hand out for the paint swatches that Jamie had. He handed them over with ease, “we painted one wall, dark, the wall I had my bed on, and the rest we did light.” You explained, Jamie giving Ivy a bright smile when she looked at him like it was the greatest idea ever. “We can do that, Ivy.” He agreed, and you giggled, “glad I could be of help.” You added.

“Thank you,” Jamie paused, waiting for a name. “Y/N.” You told him, smiling at the pair, “and your name is?” You asked, already figuring the little girl's name was Ivy. “Jamie.” He introduced himself. “What are you painting?” Ivy asked boldly, not one to talk much around new people, Jamie set her down so she could look at other colors, amused by her sudden interest. “I’m painting my dining room.” You answered, squatting down to her level, “do you have any color suggestions?” You asked Ivy. Jamie gave you a look that said you really don’t have to entertain her but you just gave him a smile. “Yellow.” Ivy announced, looking at the wall and grabbing actually, a very nice swatch, it was just yellow enough. You tilted your head as you looked at it, imagining it in your space. “That’s a very pretty color, Ivy.” You told her, smiling brightly as she blushed, handing you the color sample. “Thank you, Y/N.” She spoke politely, even though the words didn’t come out perfectly, it was a great attempt. “You’re welcome.” You stood to your full height, shocking Jamie by walking over to the counter to order the paint, no hesitation that a random little girl picked it out.

“You don’t have to-“ Jamie started to say, but you shrugged, giving him a happy smile, “I just got a new place, a fresh start, yellow seems fitting.” You told him. Jamie gave you a lopsided smile, if only you knew he was doing the same. “Daddy, this ones.” Ivy gasped, giving him two swatches, he chuckled at her grammar, squatting down to her level, “you’re sure?” He asked, he knew after all it was just paint, and if it turned out so terrible, they could paint over it but he didn’t want to have to do this twice. “This one looks like momma's dress!” Ivy explained, Jamie looked at the dark purple in his hand, instantly remembering Cora in that dress, Ivy’s favorite picture of her that she kept in her room. Suddenly her color choice made sense, you couldn’t help but eavesdrop, your heart stopping at Jamie’s next words. “Yeah, I think momma would have loved this.”

Was she… dead? You tried to knock the thought from your head, they were so young, but you knew accidents happened. You quickly looked away as Jamie stood back up, “here you go ma’am.” The teenager behind the counter spoke, you took the gallon from him, shooting him a smile. “Have a good day.” You told him, offering Jamie and Ivy a wave. “Will I see you again?” Ivy asked, Jamie nearly had heart failure right there as you stopped and giggled. “Oh I don’t know sweetheart, Seattle is a really big city. But don’t you worry, if I ever see you out and about I’ll be sure to say hello.” You assured her, watching as she got all giddy and slightly hid behind her father again. “Bye.” You told him, biting the inside of your cheek to keep from smiling any wider. “Bye, Y/N.” He mumbled, seeming a little dazed as he made his way up to the counter.

***

It had been nearly a week in the new house, the walls were done, almost everything was unpacked and they were starting to feel a sense of normalcy. Jamie loved the neighborhood they ended up in, a true mix of all different people, yes their house was rather large, but it was still homey. The community was sprawling, having a little bit of everything, stand alone homes, townhomes, even some condos, there were plenty of kids around which made him feel good about his choice as he followed Ivy down the road as she rode her bike. “Slow down, Ivy.” Jamie cautioned as she was getting a good bit ahead of him, she huffed dramatically and slowed down, waiting for him to catch up. She was looking around at the houses, confused as to why they were attached, even though Jamie had explained it to her plenty of times. Ivy gasped so loudly, that you could hear it from your front lawn where you were spray painting a piece of furniture. You glanced over and did a double take.

There was absolutely no way, you refused to believe you were actually seeing this, then you saw Jamie and you were convinced the universe either loved you for letting you see him again, or hated you, as you were in ratty old painting clothes.

“Ivy!” You grinned, laughing when the little girl flew off her bike, letting it fall sideways, making Jamie groan, “hi Y/N!” She squealed running up your lawn. You smiled brightly as she hugged your leg, “Ivy.” Jamie called, giving you an apologetic smile but you shrugged it off. “Did you paint your room?” You asked the little girl as she pulled away, a pink tint to her cheeks, she nodded, her blonde curls bouncing in her ponytail. “Yay, that’s great!” You cheered, Jamie walked up behind her, “hi, Y/N. How are you?” He asked, his daughter leaning back against his legs as you two spoke. “Good, been busy making this place my own.” You laughed, motioning to the small townhome behind you. It was your first solo place, and you absolutely adored it, even if it needed some work. “Yeah, you always forget how much work it is moving into a new place.” He agreed, chuckling softly. “Did you do yellow?” Ivy asked, rocking on her feet. “I did.” You assured her, “would you two like to go in and see it?” You asked, cringing internally as you waited to look up at Jamie. “Sure.” He answered, grabbing his daughter's hand, following you inside.

You led them to the dining room, giggling as Ivy gasped, “so pretty!” She cheered, the yellow paid off, it made the space feel much more happy. “All because of you.” You told her, she asked if she could look at the pictures you had sitting on the entry table and you gave her a quick nod, giving you and Jamie a chance to talk. “Same neighborhood? If I didn’t know any better I’d think you were stalking me.” You teased him lightly, getting a hearty chuckle out of him. “It is quite the coincidence.” He agreed, he felt butterflies in his stomach for the first time since he had met Cora.

It absolutely terrified him.

***

It had been a few weeks since that day, and you’d seen Ivy outside playing with another woman, Jamie not to be seen. You came out to grab your mail as she went riding by, “hi, Y/N!” She called, continuing to pedal away. “Hi, Ivy.” You spoke, you went over and introduced yourself to the girl, Taylor, finding out she was her babysitter. “Jamie must go out pretty often.” You commented to her, she shook her head, “oh no, he never goes anywhere without Ivy aside from work.” Taylor told you, “he plays hockey, I'm surprised you didn’t know that.” Taylor added, smiling as Ivy came up to the two of you. “We should be going, it’s almost dinner time.” Taylor spoke, she couldn’t be older than 20. You gave them both a smile, “yes! You don’t want to miss that.” You chuckled, bidding them a goodbye before going inside and googling Jamie.

What you found shocked you.

Jamie Oleksiak taking personal time to mourn loss of fiancé.

Jamie Oleksiak, will he be able to balance a professional career and a baby?

Will he bounce back from this?

You clicked the first article, bracing yourself as it loaded.

The date was from almost three years ago, you scrolled down and began to read…

Jamie Oleksiak has announced the sudden passing of his fiancé, Cora Hadley. Together they shared a daughter Ivy, who was also involved in the incident, she is expected to make a complete recovery.

A close friend tells us it was a severe car accident.

Our condolences to the family.

You clicked away from the article as tears burned your eyes. That was terrible. You read some of the other articles and only grew mad at how the reporters belittled his pain, only talking of how poorly his game play had been since then. And though you’d never wish that kind of loss on anyone, you know they wouldn’t be writing like that if they had felt it.

***

You and Jamie exchanged numbers, citing that it was for “neighborhood emergencies” you giggled at the thought as he was currently asking you what he should get Cora for the upcoming Christmas.

She’s the pickiest three year old ever, everyone always tells me that.

Well, what does the pickiest three year old ever like to do?

She’s either riding her bike and getting absolutely filthy or she’s inside playing dress up and being a little princess

Princess car?

They make those?!?

Oh, Jamie, I really need to take you shopping 🤦‍♀️

Tell me when and I’ll be there…

You tell me hot shot, you’re the one that plays hockey for a living.

How did you find out?

Google is a powerful thing… just kidding, Taylor told me.

Of course she did

Saturday afternoon? My parents will be in town and they want to take Ivy out for the day, so it’s a perfect excuse.

You know where I live, see you then!

He started typing, but then the dots went away and you never received another message.

You brushed it off, feeling butterflies in your stomach for the first time in years as you thought of merely shopping with Jamie for Christmas.

****

“You like him!” Your friend gushed to you as you spoke on the phone while getting ready, “no!” You rushed, only proving her point more. “Y/N, really.” Your friend, Amanda, spoke. “There’s nothing wrong with that, he’s clearly attractive and he’s a dad! He’s not going to be a jerk that just messed around with girls! It’s great.” She rambled, you sighed, pulling your jeans on with a little jump, “his fiancé died, Amanda. He could very well not be over that yet, and I wouldn’t blame him.” You explained, she went silent, “well you left that part out, how was I supposed to know.” She mumbled sheepishly. “It was almost three years ago, their baby was only six months old.” You whispered, cursing when your doorbell rang down the stairs. “Shit, shit, I have to go Amanda!” You rushed, hanging up as soon as she said bye. You adjusted the sweater you had on as you rushed down the stairs, careful not to fall flat on your face. You grabbed your purse as you walked past the counter, yelping as you stumbled and landed on your butt. So close.

“Y/N? Are you alright?” Jamie called, hearing the thud, “yes, yeah, just a second.” You called out, wincing as you stood up, that was definitely going to hurt later. You finally, finally reached the door and unlocked it, pulling it open and giving him a bright smile. “Did you fall?” He asked instantly, bursting into laughter when your face went blank. “We’re not going to talk about that Jamie.” You chastised, stepping onto your little porch to leave with him. “Sorry, sorry.” He chuckled, giving you a once over as you locked the door. “Is Ivy excited to be with your parents today?” You asked him, Jamie laughed under his breath, “so excited, she didn’t even care that I was going out.” He told you as he opened the passenger side door of his truck for you. “Thanks.” You mumbled as you slid in, your heart pounding in your chest. He shut the door and made his way around the truck as you adjusted in the seat.

“So, where to?”

****

Jamie was shocked and grimacing at the price of the princess car that he and you both knew Ivy would love. “Is she the type to give up on new toys quickly?” You asked, tilting your head as you both stared at the display, he shook his head as gave in. He had been leaning against the shelves and as he walked away you noticed his phone had fallen out of his pocket, you picked it up so no one would steal it as you waited for him to come back with a cart, and hopefully someone to help him with the box because it was not something you’d be much help with. His phone began to ring in your hand, the contact flashing across the top said mom, you let it ring, you’d tell him as soon as he came back. As soon as it stopped it was ringing again, you panicked and swiped to answer it, worried that something had happened to Ivy. “Hello?” You spoke into the phone, hearing Ivy wailing in the background. Fuck.

“Who is this?” His mother rushed, “I’m Y/N, Jamie forgot his phone he’s walking around the store– is everything alright?” You asked, cutting straight to the point, “no, we’re going to the emergency room, Ivy fell at the park and I think she broke her arm.” His mother rushed, and thankfully you saw Jamie approaching, “Jamie!” You shouted, rushing over, he furrowed his eyebrows seeing you on his phone.

“It’s your mom.” You rushed, giving it to him and you could see the wheels turning in his head as he listened to her speak over Ivy crying. “Shit, alright I’ll meet you there.” He told her, shooting you an apologetic look. “Go.” You assured him, he shook his head grabbing your hand and pulling you along, he wasn’t going to leave you stranded in a department store. “Sorry, he’ll purchase it another day!” You called to the employee who had a blank look on his face. “Let me talk to Ivy.” Jamie demanded after his mom had said something else, “daddy, it hurts!” Ivy got out between cries as his mother held the phone to her ear. “I know, princess. I’ll be there soon alright? I promise.” He assured her, finally releasing your hand as he realized he’d been holding it this whole time.

He managed to get off the phone so he could drive to the hospital, repeatedly apologizing for you being stuck with him and that this happened. “I was going to take you to lunch and ugh I’m just sorry.” You raised an eyebrow at his ramblings as you guys got stuck at a red light less than a mile from the hospital. “Jamie, stop apologizing. She’s your daughter, she always comes first, that’s how it’s supposed to be.” You soothed him, he glanced over at you, nodding softly, “reschedule the lunch?” He asked, despite the panic in his head, he still wanted to make sure you saw that he was interested in you.

“Yeah, we can reschedule, let’s just go see your baby.” You leaned over the center console, kissing his cheek as the light changed, doing a little happy dance in your head at how he blushed deeply at your actions.

“Family only.” The nurse remarked as you were about to follow Jamie to the room Ivy was in. He gave her an incredulous look, “it’s fine, go.” You assured him, pulling away from him to stay in the waiting room. He hesitated but went along, disappearing behind the doors as you picked a seat in the corner, making sure you had a sight line to the doors he went through. Over an hour went by as you sat there, scrolling through your phone, not hearing from Jamie, which you assumed was because he was being bombarded with questions of the girl who answered his phone, while also dealing with Ivy who was not going to enjoy the process of getting a cast.

Your phone chimed with a text just as you had finally decided to get off of it,

Finishing up now, sorry if my parents are a lot

You chuckled at the message, making sure you had all your items, including the little stuffy you’d bought at the hospital gift shop during your time sitting here. You stood up as you saw them walking out, Ivy draped over Jamie’s chest, half asleep with her head on his shoulder. “Y/N, it’s so nice to meet you.” His mom spoke, offering her hand, you repeated the sentiment, as well as with his dad. “Ivy.” You whispered, placing a hand on her back, holding the small stuffed animal in your hand, “I got you a little gift for being such a big brave girl.” You mumbled, she shifted to look at you with her puffy eyes, and pout settled deep on her lips, “thanks.” She whispered, taking it and holding it close to her chest, she kept her eyes on you as you walked behind Jamie, keeping up a conversation with his parents. And he was right, they were kind of a lot, but you pushed through, smiling when Ivy finally fell asleep in the car.

You sat in the back with Ivy, Jamie insisting you didn’t have to but you wanted to. “She handled it pretty well.�� Jamie commented as he glanced back to see her asleep with her hand in yours. “She’s a tough little thing.” You agreed, glancing over at him, he gave you a heartwarming smile. “Thanks for coming with me today, I know it didn’t go to plan, but it was nice, you know… before she broke her arm.” He trailed off, pulling into your driveway to drop you off. You carefully pulled your hand from Ivy’s, she didn’t budge as she was exhausted from today.

Jamie got out to say goodbye, surprising you with a quick kiss to the cheek and a promise of that lunch date.

***

“Did some research?” You asked teasingly as Jamie took you to your favorite restaurant, you gave him a sideways glance as he parked the truck, “I may have had some assistance.” He shrugged, making you realize that’s why Ivy was grilling you the other day, when you had offered to watch her since Taylor was unavailable. “You two are trouble.” You quipped, watching him slip out wordlessly before opening your door for you. “But I’m a gentleman.” He reminded you, “a very good one at that.” You agreed, steadying yourself with his shoulders when you hoped down. “I’m going to kiss you now.” He declared, had you not wanted to kiss him so badly you would have teased him for the nervousness in his voice, but you simply looped your arms around his neck and let him sweep you off your feet with a wonderful first kiss.

The first of many.

***

Two months, and many, many, sneaky dates and stolen kisses later…

You were over at Jamie’s house, having dinner with him and Ivy, you and Jamie had gone out here and there, but most of your time was spent together with Ivy, and that’s what told him that you were the girl he needed to hang on to. Jamie wanted to take tonight to explain to Ivy that you two were dating, but he was scared, petrified even, that she would become upset and confused. You kept telling him nothing had to be done yet if he wasn’t ready, but he was, he swore he was.

“What’s your favorite color?” You asked Ivy, dinner was long gone and you were playing a game of twenty questions, she wasn’t entirely aware of that but she was having fun nonetheless. “Purple! Like my mommas.” She declared, you gave her a smile, glancing over at Jamie to see how he handled it. Many conversations had happened between you two about the loss of Cora, you never wanted to rush him, and as he only gave Ivy a proud smile, you could tell he was truly ready to start the next chapter of his life again. You liked to think Cora was proud of him, for choosing you to be in their life.

“What’s yours?” Ivy countered back, giving you an inquisitive look, the closer she got to age four, the more like Jamie she seemed, and it always made you chuckle. “Yellow.” You told her, watching as she grinned, Jamie winked at you as you turned sheepish under their gaze. “Because of me?” Ivy gasped. “Yes, because of you.” You giggled, welcoming her hug when she bounced over to you. “Ivy, do you know what it means when people are dating?” Jamie asked his daughter as she stayed seated on your lap, she rested her elbows on the table, holding her head in her hands. “No but you said I’m not allowed to do that.” She spoke in a serious tone, sending you into a hysterical fit of laughter, not expecting her to be so blunt. Jamie tried not to but he joined you with a deep laugh, tipping his head back as Ivy grew impatient. “Ok, besides that.” Jamie cleared his throat, “when I say I’m dating someone that means that I really really like them and I want them to be part of our life.” He explained as best he could, you smiled from behind her at his words. Encouraging him to go on.

“Y/N and I are dating.” He spoke officially, you both held your breath as you waited for her reaction, she turned and looked at you, and then back to her dad. “You love her!” Ivy grinned, sending Jamie wide eyed and you into a wide smile as he blushed, “you love my daddy!” Ivy gasped turning to you, now he was the one grinning as you opened and closed your mouth trying to find the words to say. You gave her a nod, “well, it’s a bit more complicated than that when you’re our age, but yes.” You agreed with her, Jamie grabbed your hand from across the table, giving it a squeeze as Ivy climbed off your lap and started dancing around.

This had gone so much better than he had hoped.

When he was tucking her in that night while you were waiting for him on the couch, she said a few words that made him one hundred percent sure that everything was going the way it should, and that Cora even played a hand in this. “Can I have two favorite colors daddy?” Ivy asked, looking up at him sleepily as he pulled the blanket up her body, she was clinging to the stuffy you’d bought her. “Of course, bug.” He assured her, thinking that was that, but as he kissed her forehead she said, “purple and yellow are my favorites.” By the time he pulled his head back, her eyes were shut and her breathing was evening out. “Yeah, I think those are my favorites too.” He whispered.

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#Jamie Oleksiak fic #Jamie Oleksiak #Jamie Oleksiak imagine #Seattle kraken #nhl imagine

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