#I’m so glad everyone in the tags agreed this is Naruto

[inactiveanimeblog]

shikamaru x reader fic change chapter two

tw : drinking, smoking, shikamarus a little meanie

link to chapter one here

you sat down and poured yourself a shot of lemon bacardi. it was 22:43, outside was dark but the summer air was humid. you were already a little tipsy, waiting for shikamaru and his friends to arrive to the party. butterfly effect by travis scott was playing in the background, and the led lights changed colors around the room. your friends talked amongst you while you started to roll up a blunt. already tons of people had shown up to the party, a lot of faces you recognized in high school.

“so, shikamaru said he’s coming by with some of his friends and i want you guys to meet him. i bet his friends are gonna be cute cause his roommate was.” you giggled as you started to pack the blunt, being careful not to drop any of the weed.

“some eye candy huh?” ino asked already extremely plastered. ino was hilarious when she was drunk, not caring what comes out of her mouth, usually stating her mind. you already knew she was gonna be flirting with the guys when they got here.

“yeah we can only hope. most guys here are frat boys, i’m sick of looking at them.” mikasa laughed out, bringing her red solo cup up to her lips. mikasa was also clearly drunk. “oh by the way y/n how’d that go earlier?”

“it went good, he really noticed that i changed and i’m surprised he wanted to come to this party tonight when i invited him. he used to not even wanna be seen in public with me.” you rolled your eyes thinking about how much of an outcast he used to make you feel.

not too long after, shikamaru walked in with his group of friends to the led lights still flashing slowly, orange soda by baby keem now playing. he immediately looked around the house for you.

he already caught most girls attention in the room, no girl trying to hide their obvious stares, which he ignored. he found you after a few minutes of walking by drunk and dancing people. you were already intoxicated, blunt in hand about to be lit up.

“yo y/n !” shikamaru called out, walking up to you and your friends.

“oh, hey shikamaru. you made it and you brought your friends.” you commented, grinning at them.

“yeah, this is kiba which you already met earlier, naruto, deidara, sai, and sasuke.”

“nice to meet you guys i’m y/n and this is mikasa, ino, hinata, and sasha.” you pointed to each one of your friends while you called out their name. “now that we all met each other let’s take some shots, yeah?” you said already pouring up the bacardi in some little plastic shot glasses.

“bacardi hm? you be drinking rum like that?” deidara asked taking the shot you handed to him.

“i don’t usually go for bacardi, my preference is dark liquor. i like henny.” you answered truthfully, downing your shot with a sour look on your face and grabbing a lighter from your pocket to spark up the blunt.

“hennessy? wow i like you already. so you’re from around here? shikamaru never mentioned you guys were friends.” he asked. shikamaru stayed silent as he took the shot, eyeing you down as you already looked like you were about to black out.

“yeah i am actually. i’ve been gone for a few months but i just got back recently. also not surprised. he switched up on me in high school.” you teased looking over at shikamaru, and taking a hit of the blunt.

shikamaru gave you a pointed look and sat the shot down on a nearby table. “not true, i never switched up on you. but i could say the same for you. you deny you’re different but you clearly are.”

“yeah right shika, just cause i look a little different doesn’t mean i switched up on you.” you answered back, noticing the tinge of bitterness in his voice.

“anyways, i’m glad you guys came let’s finish this blunt and go play some beer pong, yeah?”

“sounds good.”

“i’m down.”

“y/n, be my partner?” deidara asked.

“sure, as long as you don’t make us look bad.” you giggled, pausing the blunt over to him.

“yeah right, if anything i’m gonna be the one hitting all the cups .” he said taking the blunt from your fingers.

“mm yeah we’ll see.”

you guys played pong for a while, you and deidara actually did a decent job, surprisingly winning most of the games. it was fun, and you noticed how competitive shikamaru and his friends were.

ino suggested you guys sit in a room and play a game of truth or dare which everyone agreed on. the game was pretty intense, involving ino and sai making out, which even after the dare was over they didn’t bother to stop, naruto doing body shots off hinata, and now it was your turn to pick truth or dare.

“y/n truth or dare?” hinata asked.

“i’ll take a risk and choose dare.” you smirked.

“okay, umm i dare you to kiss deidara.”

everyone in the room looked around at each other while you sat there and blushed. shikamaru was looking at both you and deidara, hiding the fact that he was annoyed from the dare. his face was blank but on the inside he was boiling.

“okay.. say less.” you responded crawling over to where deidara was sitting. you closed your eyes and licked your bottom lip before pecking him lightly, then steadily sneaking your tongue in his mouth.

the kids turned into a quick make out session, slow passionate kissing, with some touching. his hands traveled down your body, and grabbed your ass. everyone in the room watched and whistled at you guys.

shikamaru sat quietly, his body feeling like it was burning up while he watched intently. it took everything out of him not to get upset, but he couldn’t help himself. not when deidara out of all people had his tongue down your throat.

a couple of games later it was now shikamaru’s turn to ask someone truth or dare, he was still annoyed over the fact that you and deidara were all over each other, maybe even jealous, so him being an asshole decided to pick you once again,

“y/n, truth or dare?” he asked, a fake smile appearing on his lips.

“i’ll pick truth this time.”

“okay.. is it true that you used to be a loser for a majority of your life?” the room fell silent, the smile still on shikamaru’s face. your friends had their mouths opened trying to chime in and say something to defend you, wondering why he would ask such a rude truth. a few of shikamaru’s friends were geeking silently, trying to hold in their laughs.

you scowled your brows and stared at him in disbelief. you thought maybe since you looked and acted different that shikamaru would pay attention to you, in a positive way. you thought wrong. he was still an ass.

“yeah it’s true.” you spat out. “this games dumb i’m gonna go get some jungle juice.”

getting up from your spot and walking out of the room your friends got up and trailed behind you, a disappointed look in their faces as they followed you out.

“come on man? why would you do that? i was about to score with her!” deidara called out at him.

“my fault bro, there’s plenty of other badder girls here. she was starting to annoy me.” shikamaru shrugged getting up to explore the rest of the party, while his friends got up and did the same.

you left the party that night hurt and confused. one point you were having fun and all of a sudden shikamaru was acting out of character. you got that he was an asshole now, but never did he embarrass you like that in front of others. if this was how shikamaru was gonna be then you decided you would be fine without him.

it’s been a few days since the party. you were sulking in bed, watching anime. it sucked that you had to leave shikamaru behind. you wanted him to see you as more than just a loser. it felt like everything you did to change yourself was for no reason and you—

*buzz*

your thoughts were interrupted by a vibrate of your phone. you groaned as you sat up to reach for it. to your surprise it was a text from shikamaru.

tag : @tojisbbyg

[animeyanderelover]

I've looked through your "sharing a darling" post and I've been inspired. I'd love to see Tsunade with a darling, who's Orochimaru's little sister. I imagine she and Tsuna probably were friends before she deserted the village with Orochi. And when she's nowhere near as heartless as Orochi, she's a morally-gray type of person. [With romantic yandere!Tsunade + platonic!yandere Orochimaru]

I’m glad you got inspired by my post☺️.

Tw: Yandere themes, unhealthy mindset, unhealthy relationship, possessiveness, obsessiveness, paranoia, violence

Darling is Orochimaru’s little sister

🐍🐌We’ve often talked about this, but Orochimaru has a weird way of showing his care, especially if it comes to persons he’s obsessed with. If you would be a test object he would most likely show genuine interest in you because you’re very useful. But how does this work when you’re his sister? It’s suspected that a part of why Orochimaru became the way he is like he is because he wanted to leave the painful memories of the past behind, including the death of his parents. So you were the only family he had left.

🐍🐌His way of caring showed himself from a very young age on with wanting you to get stronger. Orochimaru has a dislike for the fragility of life and it’s most likely that you and him shared more or less the same interest in kinjutsu. I can’t say that you had the same obsession as him with it, but you just tagged along with him.

🐍🐌Since Tsunade and Orochimaru were on the same team it was understandable that you were friends with them. Jiraiya was probably the guy who often asked you out on dates and made some less appropriate comments about you, earning a hit on the head from Tsunade and a unnerving look from Orochimaru. Tsunade was most likely friends with you because you were the only other girl from the three.

🐍🐌At the beginning it was just a friendship, a strong one. Tsunade was often a bit worried about you, knowing how twisted Orochimaru could be. You never minded, being used to all of this since you had grown up with him together.

🐍🐌Tsunade started becoming a tad more clingy and overprotective after Nawaki had died. It was somewhat of the beginning of her Yandere tendencies and it stayed that way even after she had got to know Dan. You often visited with her together Nawaki’s grave and showed him respect for his actions. But you were glad that Tsunade had found someone else who made her happy since you had suffered with her after the death of her brother. Because despite being slightly influenced from Orochimaru’s twisted personality you had always been the one who had cared more and showed it more.

🐍🐌Somehow I think after Dan died as well and you were again there to comfort Tsunade you somehow started to see things a bit more from Orochimaru’s side, understanding why he loathed the fragility of life. Because humans were so delicate that you could lose them at any moment. I would even go as far that Tsunade’s devastation over Nawaki and Dan left a huge impact on you and led you to becoming who you were.

🐍🐌Tsunade was at first most likely only a platonic Yandere for you, still seeing you as her best friend. She became incredibly clingy and overprotective and also started greatly disliking your brother. Why? Because Orochimaru gave off the feeling that you didn’t mean anything to him and he wouldn’t even be sad if you would die. He hadn’t looked affected when Nawaki had died and he hadn’t looked really affected when Dan had died. So it was no wonder that Tsunade was terrified of losing you as well and needing to see how not even you as Orochimaru’s sister would lead him to show any sorrow.

🐍🐌It was at the beginning just the genuine desire to keep you safe and alive. But with time it turned into something more intense for Tsunade. The knowledge that she could lose the person who had been always there for you made her go almost crazy. She might not even have realized when exactly it had happened. But one day you just gave her a warm smile...And Tsunade felt her heart speeding up in her chest rapidly and butterflies erupting from the pit of her stomach.

🐍🐌Orochimaru watched all of this with narrowed eyes, the way how Tsunade started clinging onto you tightly and the way she looked at you. It didn’t matter to him that Tsunade deserved happiness after everything that had happened to her. He didn’t want you to become weak by becoming too sentimental which you obviously were. It wasn’t like you had already changed a lot because of him, your view of the world having become slightly distorted because of his influence and the still fresh memory of Tsunade mourning over her brother and her lover. And I bet Orochimaru used that to control you a bit more.

🐍🐌Tsunade on the other hand worried because she noticed clearly how much you had changed in those last years and she knew too well who the culprit was. So she tried to keep you away from Orochimaru by often going out with you and asking you to spend time with him. And this didn’t suit with Orochimaru who would have preferred to continue training and experimenting with you.

🐍🐌It was most likely out of loyalty and own belief that you decided to follow Orochimaru into exile, some of his beliefs having influenced you as well. And Tsunade was once again completely devastated for losing another precious person to her, asking herself what she had done so terribly wrong in life to lose everyone she seemed to love.

🐍🐌Being Orochimaru’s sister and most likely on the same level of strength as him made you very respected and worshipped by his underlings like Kabuto and Kimimaro. And despite searching with him for a way to gain complete immortality You never agreed with his opinions all the time, disliking the way he treated others. You were somewhat of a mother figure for many people under him and were even known to forgive people different than Orochimaru. And Orochimaru didn’t really like this, fearing that your softness would be one day your death sentence. Orochimaru isn’t the type to start a fight over this, at least not in the classic sense. But he would cruelly tease your weak spots to get a reaction out of you and to try to reason with you that being so soft wouldn’t bring you anywhere.

🐍🐌I guess that Tsunade’s heart broke even more after hearing what you were doing, experimenting on people to gain immortality. She blamed herself for this, feeling like she should have ripped you away from your brother’s tight grip sooner since he had been the one who had corrupted you like this.

🐍🐌Tsunade met you most likely again whilst Naruto and Jiraiya were searching for her to convince her to become the fifth Hokage. She was already pissed enough at Orochimaru, never having forgiven him for ruining you like this. But she was also scared when seeing you again, freezing at first. She just really hoped that there was still some part of the old you left and not having become as cruel and heartless as Orochimaru had. You were also shocked to see her again, feeling a bit conflicted about how to face her after all those years again.

🐍🐌During the fight of the three you didn’t really participate, watching more from a distance. Not because you were lazy, but because you and Orochimaru knew that you might switch sides during the battle. Because you still cared. Tsunade was still your friend. So when Orochimaru wanted to kill Naruto and Tsunade kept sacrificing herself you would have lied if you would have said that you didn’t care. Instead you might have even tried to stop Orochimaru from completely killing her, that was at least until she released her jutsu and showed what she was capable off.

🐍🐌Different from Orochimaru you also never disliked Naruto and saw him as a poor excuse. You saw potential and passion in him, reminding you of Nawaki. That’s why you wanted to keep him alive. Because he had helped Tsunade out of her misery. And you were proud of her when she officially became Hokage, sending a anonymous gift and a small letter in which you congratulated her and told her how happy you were for her. And Tsunade knew too well who had sent her this.

🐍🐌I feel like after Sasuke joined Orochimaru you might have even gone as far as sometimes giving the village hints about his development without anyone finding out. And whenever such small notes received in the village, dropping hints about current whereabouts or informations about possible future plans from Orochimaru Tsunade always felt hopeful and encouraged that the old You was still there, that you weren’t completely possessed by evil like your older brother was.

🐍🐌I feel like you traveled back to the village after Sasuke killed Orichimaru. You had no reason to stay after all. And for someone who was known as an S-rated criminal you came over pretty calm when suddenly appearing in front of the gates of your old village. And best belief that when Tsunade Heard- that you were back, she completely lost it and instantly stormed towards you, not knowing whether to yell at you for doing such terrible things to her and other people or cry and suffocate you in a hug out of relief. In the end it became a mix made out of both.

🐍🐌You were taken under custody back into the village, your reputation being a bit saved because of all the small hints you had given them through the years. That and the fact that you answered all questions honestly have some ninjas troubles to judge you rightfully, not knowing whether to think of you as a good or bad person. On the one hand you had experimented on others, you had used the same jutsu as Orochimaru to reach immortality and many other things. But on the other hand there were countless tellings and rumors from many places and people that you had freed them out of Orochimaru’s grip or had even helped villages in need on your journeys. That made it somewhat troublesome whether to decide if you belonged in prison or not.

🐍🐌In the end it was decided to not send you into prison, mainly because Tsunade had insisted on it, but also because many had agreed that you had done many good things after all and had come back on your own free will, not to mention that you had told them everything they had wanted and needed answers for for so long. But you were kept under very tight custody, a few Anbu members always watching you.

🐍🐌Shizune knew from Tsunade’s love for you, having witnessed many times how Tsunade had started becoming very talkative about you after a few or many bottles of sake and knew that Tsunade had still feelings for you. And she advices to not risk anything with you, they still didn’t know whether you were on their side or not. Tsunade didn’t want to hear this, but not because she believed that Shizune was wrong, but because she knew that Shizune might be right.

🐍🐌She often came visiting you, wanting to at least talk to you and know why you had done this. Why you had left her. Why you had decided to tag along with Orochimaru. Why you had done all those terrible things and still so much good stuff at the same time. What were your motives?

🐍🐌I feel like Tsunade would be able to start a normal relationship with you after the war and after Orochimaru was reincarnated. Because the main problem before had been that people had, when looking at you, only been able to see Orochimaru. A cruel and sadistic criminal. But for whatever reason Orochimaru had been forgiven after the shinobi war and Tsunade also retired more or less since Kakashi became the sixth Hokage shortly after the war ended. There will be some tension between her and Orochimaru after that, especially since Tsunade still blames Orochimaru for corrupting you like this. Orochimaru wouldn’t be too happy either, but surprisingly he’s more okay than Tsunade with this since he doesn’t hold that much of a personal grudge against her like she does. He did become better after the war and was more accepting with it. As long as you don’t become a weakling that is, power is still a thing and will always be a thing for him.

[vannahfanfics]

The Blessings of Wisteria Blossoms

Category: Friendship Fluff

Fandoms: My Hero Academia, Naruto

Characters: Momo Yaoyorozu, Sakura Haruno

Additional Tags: Crossover

Hello, everyone! Here is the last story I did for the @quirknojutsuzine​. I had a lot of fun writing about two of the best girls ever!

“Ahhh~” Momo hummed in contentment as she eased her sore body down onto the wooden bench. Her aching limbs welcomed the reprieve, the pulsing pain they’d been assaulting Momo with for the last thirty minutes dimming in intensity now that they’d gotten the rest they’d wanted. Her hands cupped a ceramic mug of steaming hot black tea sweetened with cream and honey. As she sipped the brew, its warmth spread through her weary skin and bones, making her hum once more. 

As Momo enjoyed her tea, her black eyes began to wander to the area surrounding the teahouse. It was an isolated venue, nestled in the forest paths between training grounds—making it a popular spot for young ninjas-in-training such as herself. It was merely more than a wooden shack hugging the dirt road, with a few small benches and tea tables scattered in the grassy front, but Momo thought that it was cute and quaint. It had well-tended flowerboxes nestled against the siding, bursting with brilliant aromatic blooms of white and baby-blue. Several windchimes hung from the porch, filling the breeze with melodic tinkling. One of the windows was open to allow the scent of freshly-baked pastries to drift out into the road and entice passersby. 

A quaint place indeed, but Momo’s favorite thing about the place was the wisteria trees. The massive curling trees towered over the teahouse to drape it in their long plumes of blossoms. To Momo, it always looked like a purple rain descended from the sky as the delicate flowers showered the area and filled the air with their sweet aroma. She loved to breathe it in, appreciating how the flowery fragrance complimented the robust tea leaves bobbing in the ceramic cup. Ino had told her once that wisterias symbolized both longevity and the act of expanding consciousness. Momo thought it ironic that the wisterias lined the training grounds’ path as if blessing the young ninja with both long, fruitful lives and neverending knowledge. 

As Momo sipped at her tea and watched the plumules of wisteria blossoms wave in the breeze, a cheerful voice floated from further down the path. Momo turned to see a pink-haired girl waving jovially as she bobbed up the first road.

“Well, hello there, Sakura,” Momo smiled politely as the kunoichi joined her at the bench. 

“Hey, Momo! Coming back from afternoon training?” the girl asked as she motioned to sit beside Momo. Momo graciously scooted over so that Sakura would have ample room on the bench, and the girl gratefully sat down and rested her hands on her lap. 

“That’s right! Are you heading there yourself?” 

“Yeah, but I’m just going to check on Naruto to make sure that he’s not pushing himself too hard,” the girl sighed, throwing up her arms and shaking her head. “He’s always been like that, working himself ragged. If I don’t check on him every now and again, he’ll pass out in the woods and die one of these days!” 

As Sakura griped about her reckless teammate, Momo had to chuckle. The words were harsh, but Sakura’s tone was warm, belying the respect and fondness she held for her teammate. When the pink-haired girl looked at Momo quizzically, Momo smiled empathetically. 

“I understand. Shoto is the same way. I had to go to his house the other day and hand-feed him soba because he’d burned his arms to a crisp trying to master a new jutsu,” she tutted and patted her cheek as she recalled it. Of course, Momo was more than happy to help Shoto in his time of need, but it had been undermined by the intense worry she felt beholding his arms swathed in bandages and leaking burn cream from the seams. Not to mention how inherently embarrassing feeding someone was—Momo’s cheeks flushed as she remembered spooning cold soba into Shoto’s mouth, and she hastily changed the topic of conversation. “Not just our teammates, either! Izuku’s constantly breaking his bones trying to pull off grander and grander stunts, and even Katsuki tore up his hands with his explosion jutsu the other day…” 

“Now that you think about it, why are all the village boys so reckless?” Sakura groaned, gripping the edge of the bench as she tipped back her head and sighed heavily. “Really, without us girls, they’d probably live half their lives in a hospital ward! I swear.” 

“Speaking of, isn’t Lee back in the hospital again?” 

“Yes!” Sakura exclaimed in exasperation. “He broke his foot racing Naruto up a mountain! The dumbass tripped, fell, and tumbled all the way back down to the base. It’s a wonder he didn’t end up worse off! He’s lucky Hinata and Mina were nearby; they were able to splinter his foot until the medical team could arrive.”

Momo laughed airily as she held her hand to her cheek, feeling a bead of sweat roll down and catch against her fingertips. Now that she and Sakura conversed about it, the village boys really were forces of nature who landed themselves in all sorts of predicaments—and the girls were always there to mediate the aftermath. 

“It’s a wonder we’re able to get any of our own training in since we’re so busy babysitting all these knuckleheads,” Sakura snorted with a wry smile. Her gaze softened as she looked out into the trees, at the purple wisterias mingling with the emerald oak leaves. “They sure do keep things interesting, though.” 

“Oh, most definitely,” Momo agreed. “It’s heartening, too, to see the lengths they go to get stronger. I constantly find myself inspired. Maybe we ought to be a little more reckless.” 

Sakura rolled her head to give Momo a sardonic scowl. 

“What? Do you think those bozos would know how to take care of us? They can’t even take care of themselves.” 

A second of silence descended between them. Then, they both burst into fits of giggles. Their little chuckles rose to flutter through the purple blossoms, dancing through them like bubbles until they drifted up to fade into the sky. Slowly, their laughter dwindled until they were both reclining back on the bench and smiling warmly as they considered the impetuous young boys they had the pleasure—or displeasure?—of calling friends. 

“Well,” Sakura hummed as she slapped her legs and then pushed herself up off the bench, “I’d better make sure Naruto’s not dead.”

“Yes, I had better be off, too. I’m going to check on Shoto.” Momo, who had finished her tea, stood as well.

“Ugh, they really wouldn’t know what to do without us, would they?” Sakura smiled with a shake of her head. 

“No, but we’re stuck with them, so we might as well help them out where they need it.” 

“You’re right. See you later, Momo!” Sakura said with a wave of farewell before she started down the path once more. Momo watched her go, then returned the teacup to the owner. As she started off in the opposite direction, she paused in front of the wisteria blooms as they waved like curtains in the wind. Smiling, she plucked off a few tendrils of the buds and tucked them close to her chest as she started down the path again. 

I’ll stop by Ino’s flower shop and snag a lovely vase on the way to Shoto’s, she decided with a bright smile. He could use some blessings of longevity, I think. She chuckled to herself, already anticipating that the hapless Shoto would have no idea why Momo would bring him some wisteria blossoms. She sighed into the wind and looked up at the sky as she walked along. 

Sure, they were reckless boys, but Momo was glad that she and her friends could look after them. Together, supporting one another, they could all climb heights that no one ever thought possible. If they could physically survive the ordeal, at least!

Enjoy this oneshot? Feel free to peruse my Table of Contents!

[nodesiretogrowup]

LET’S GET READY TO RE-CAAAAAAAAP

“I have numerous science-based questions” I mean, same. It also sets up that Huey is gonna be out of his element this episode

SCROOGE HAS NO TIME FOR SCIENCE

“I AM THAT CHAMPION.” A bit full of yourself there. I couldn’t hear this line without saying “I’M. THAT. HERO.” Oh VeggieTales, you’ll always be with me

THEY ALL LOOK SO ADORABLE!!

I like that Louie does a finger gun when Scrooge gets to him

Like I said earlier, I DO NOT care Scrooge already putting pressure on these kids

Poor Dewey seems like he’s the unfavorite, which is probably how Donald felt as well

Huey makes a good point and I do NOT like how dismissive Scrooge is of the twins

That being said...they totally killed someone in battle

SOMEDAY WE’LL FIND IT, THE RAINBOW CONNECTION!

Why didn’t Launchpad crash? I know he can land w/o crashing but it’s usually when he lands in water. THIS FEELS IMPORTANT SOMEHOW though it probably isn’t

“THEY FOUND A WAY TO MAKE RAINBOWS BETTER!” God, I love Webby

“This is the best day.” WEBBY, YOU ARE REACHING CRITICAL LEVELS OF ADORABLE

Birds with beards look odd

“Yeah, sure. Of course.” Poor Huey, magic and mythology aren’t his strong point

I love that it says Odin’s Closet over the shirts. It’s the little details

“Guess Louie knows what Louie’s doing today.” And then he disappears into the shirts. I can appreciate someone who knows what they’re about

I want ALL the shirts from this episode!

“WHOA, IT’S WRESTLING!” He looks so dang happy, it’s ADORABLE

“THIS IS AWESOME!” Chanting is fun

“So these guys just copied professional wrestling?” Huey, you’re form of logic is not welcome here

Does that mean Scrooge told someone about his battles and inspired them to create pro wrestling? I’m gonna go with that

“And they will love me for it!” Dewey, sweetie, that’s only how it works half the time

I loved all the man-snake stuff. Made me giggle

Man snake be THICC. HOT DAMN

I love the little pig ref. HE’S SO CUTE

Jormungandr knows how to pump up a crowd

So, like, is everyone in the audience technically DEAD?! That makes this episode slightly darker. I dig it

 I wonder if Jormungandr sees Earth’s destruction as a good thing for Earth. Like if he genuinely thinks they’d be better off in Valhalla. Or if he’s just a bastard who wants to watch the world burn

Scrooge is a bit too into playing the heel

The way Scrooge moves and the faces he makes as the Millionaire Miser remind me of Glomgold

“I watch a lot of wrestling while I fly.” “Wait, while?” This exchange always cracks me up

“Uncle Scrooge is the greatest hero of all time.” “Huh, I guess not everyone thinks so.” I feel like this is foreshadowing later events

RIP Announcer Puffin

“DIBS ON ANNOUNCING!” A dude just got KO’d bro! Have a bit of respect

And the return of the dynamic sports announcer duo. Glad Huey got his badge

I NEED MORE WRESTLING ANNOUNCER LP

Strongbeard is DOPE

“How did you know that?” “Just calling it like I see it. WRESTLING!” The real reason Launchpad knows is because he’s actually Thor but doesn’t remember. I WILL DIE ON THIS HILL

FEAR THE BEARD

“What matters is I’m doing the right thing.” I don’t know, you really seem to enjoy being a heel

This whole match is great

Dewey, there ARE NO RULES IN WRESTLING. Plus you aren’t the ref, so you can’t make that call

I have very inappropriate jokes go through my head when only one arm absorbs the beard energy

“I am so confused.” CONSTANT MOOD

DID SCROOGE NARUTO RUN AT STRONGBEARD?!

I like that Scrooge dives onto him the same way he dives into his bin

LP is so excited he pushes Huey out of the way for NO REASON

HOLY FUCK THAT DUDE THREW A CHAIR AT A CHILD!

All the bone cracking in this episode made me uncomfortable, as in my bones hurt during it

“He is such a good guy.” I’d say he’s a fair guy, not necessarily a good guy

“Which two of you will fight for me?” Webby has been waiting for this moment her WHOLE LIFE

Louie, always taking time to make that money

Who gave him a shirt cannon?!

I love that the dude comes up wearing the shirt

Dewey just slaps Scrooge in the face

Champ POPular! Too cute! I love his hair and outfit. Though I don’t think Champ POPular’s “too popular to hate.” If anything he might annoy people due to his popularity

I thought he was gonna pull out yo-yos as his “finishing touch” and I was sad when it was lollipops even though that makes more sense. BRING BACK THE YO-YOS!

“Do all the fighting and make sure he doesn’t die.” That is a valid concern

WE WILL WE WILL ROCK YOU! I’D KNOW IT ANYWHERE

Huey taking notes is adorable

“Just in time for the tag-team round.” “Wait, they’re playing tag now?! MAN!” I love how Danny says MAN

How does Huey not know what a tag-team is? It’s a pretty common term

I love Launchpad’s reading face

Dewey has red, blue, and green lollipops. Cute

“HE’S THROWING LOLLIPOPS BECAUSE HE THINKS WE’RE SUCKERS!” That took me off guard and I laughed so hard

“I’ve known you my whole life, I kinda knew how this would play out.” Louie is genre savvy. Perhaps too savvy. He’s gonna figure out he’s in a tv show

“More like Champ POP..ulation zero because he has no friends...in Friendtown.” I fail to see how that was any worse than LP’s “more like Champ UN-POPular.”

“WE HATE YOU NOW!” Tough crowd

Huey’s face after that. I just want to pinch his lil cheeks

WEBBY DON’T NEED NO WRESTLER NAME

It TOTALLY went over my head that they censored Hela with Hecka (at least they used her better than the MCU did. WE COULD HAVE HAD SO MUCH BETTER)

I would let her pin me to the mat and crush my skull in

“Oh, COME ON, THIS is what you like?! A creepy goth and her pet dog!” SHUT UP, DEWEY, THAT IS EXACTLY WHAT I WANT! I’m surprised Webby didn’t slap him for the “creepy goth” comment seeing as Lena is goth and misunderstood

“HECKA YEAH! HECKA YEAH!” SHE’S SO COOL AND SEXY AND SHE HAS A DOG

Poor Huey, he’s doing his best. Hope he takes a shower later because he got pretty sweaty

HECKA COULD STEP ON ME AND I’D SAY THANK YOU

Why did Huey have all those corn puns?

“YOU’RE THE WORST! YOU’RE THE WORST!” It’s just not Huey’s day

“You don’t have to try to make it sound great, it already is.” Did this remind anyone else of Dewey’s “don’t overthink it” advice to Launchpad from Double-O Duck? He’s doing his best to help Huey

I WANT HECKA TO DESTROY ME

“EMBRACE THE BOOZE BOOS.”

Poor Dewey

WEBBY IS A BEAST! SHE WAS BORN FOR THIS!

“EMBRACE YOUR INNER HEEL!” Cuz being a heel is fun!

DUDE, WEBBY TOOK DOWN THE GODDESS OF DEATH WITH NOTHING BUT HER LEGS AND THIGHS! WE STAN!

I like that Fenny has knee pads on

“AW, YOU’RE SO DANGEROUS AND CUTE! I JUST WANT TO PET YOUR LITTLE BELLY!” WEBBY IS ME

“A classic ‘who’s a good boy?’ gambit!” AND I’D FALL FOR IT TOO! SUCH A GOOD BOI

“Wait, am I the Launchpad here?” Bitch, you WISH

“YOU CAN’T GIVE CANDY TO A DOG!” This is why you don’t have a pet, Dewey

“WHOA, back from THE DEAD for the QUEEN of the DEAD!”

Kind of a dick move, Louie

AIR GUITAR!

Jormungandr looks like a Masters of the Universe knock-off toy

WHO’S A GOOD BOI? YOU ARE!

“With a toxic personality” I think you’re projecting a bit, Jormungandr 

How does Huey not know what a battle royale is? That is a very common term! Hell, there is a well known book and movie with that title!

“I’m just a humble, noble snake man of the people.” Why does the term snake man make me laugh so much?  

WOY REFERENCE FTW

Dewey needs a hug! And some therapy would probably be a good idea

Scrooge’s speech started on a good note then went downhill FAST

“And lastly, I’ll use the dust of your bones as sweetener in my tea.” DAMN

“TOO FAR!” I DON’T THINK IT’S FAR ENOUGH! TELL HIM HOW YOU WILL BATHE IN HIS BLOOD

FUCK YEAH BEAKLEY!

SHE GAVE HIM THE CHAIR! I think this CONFIRMS Beakley as a wrestling fan

“I know we’re supposed to take over for Scrooge one day, but do you ever wonder if maybe we’re not cut out for it?” YOU SHOULDN’T HAVE TO WONDER THOSE THINGS AT ALL! 

Louie’s like WE DON’T HAVE TIME FOR THIS SHIT!

“Be LP” My new mantra

Aw, Louie sees Dewey as a hero. Like how LP saw Drake as a hero. I think @drakepad is onto something, this scene and the fight scene seem WAAAAY too much like Drake’s intro to be just a coincidence

I keep saying this, but Louie should consider a career in motivational speaking. He knows what people need to hear

“Let’s do this!” “I don’t know.” “Let’s Dewey this?” “I’m in.”

“I’LL SHED YOUR SKIN FOR YOU!” If he hadn’t of had an old man back moment that would have been a BRUTAL CUT

OMG WAS LAUNCHPAD WEARING THAT THE WHOLE TIME? You see his clothes fly off when he jumps in the ring

“Whoa. In a COMPLETELY UNEXPECTED TWIST, the announcer was Captain Crash THIS WHOLE TIME!” LP does underground wrestling matches in his spare time, TELL ME I’M WRONG

“YOUR CATCHPHRASES ARE FORCED!” I agree, Dewey could have done WAY BETTER

I like Louie just GLARING at the dude who insulted Dewey’s catchphrase

LP looks so proud of Huey

“I don’t care at all, why should I?” Methinks the snake man doth protest too much

I like how Jormungandr’s pupils are thinner during the climax. It shows off his true nature

Dewey should have been the one to do a spin attack, ya know, cuz he’s Sonic? I’ll go now

“The Pop never Stops.” That was better

WHERE ARE ALL THESE CHAIRS COMING FROM?!

I LEGIT thought Strongbeard was gonna throw Dewey his axe and I was like Dewey wouldn’t be able to lift that

SUPER SAIYAN DEWEY! Also was that a TIGER SNARL?

I like the ice pack on Launchpad’s head. Just because he can take a lot of damage doesn’t mean that LP is immune to pain

I like that the crowd CHANGED THEIR BANNERS! Nice

LOUIE AND WEBBY LOOKED SO CUTE!

LP tearing up

“A true people’s hero” I feel like that phrase will come back in relation to other characters (cough DW cough)

Scrooge is such a little shit, it’s kind of adorable

THAT END SHOT! THAT SONG!

This was a SUPER FUN EPISODE! I couldn’t really tell where they were going and I LOVED EVERY SECOND OF IT! I wish we had gotten Huey in some wrestling gear but maybe next time. I like the message that doing the right thing isn’t always popular but I kind of feel like Dewey getting the crowd on his side muddled the message somewhat. Poor Dewey needs therapy or something so he doesn’t feel like he needs CONSTANT approval. Again, he’s 11 YEARS OLD and shouldn’t be put into such a serious position. LP was VIP this episode. I’m bummed we’re on hiatus again, but WHAT an episode to end on!

[lex-nite]

“Find the Word” Tag Game

Rules: Find the assigned words in your current WIP(s), then pick 4 new words and tag others to find them.

Tagged by: @sparkswithyou​ (safe, hunger, game, around) and @hexadecimal00​ (time, sunshine, laughter, pain)

Tagging: @ladyxxdaydream @danflower623 (for fun only, no pressure)

Your words are: night, fear, last, guilt

Since I got tagged twice I’m going to pick two words from each. Excerpts are all from unposted works in progress.

Age of the Akatsuki (safe)

An AU where Kakashi is an Akatsuki member and Danzo runs the village. This scene is Iruka/Kinoe (Yamato):

“I don’t know how much longer I can keep doing this to him, Kinoe.” Iruka pressed his face into his lover’s chest. This was all to keep Naruto safe, but it didn’t make it any easier. “Have you heard from the others yet?”

Kinoe shook his head. “You know they have to be careful. All of them are being watched, especially Might-san.” Gai had not taken Danzo’s leadership laying down. He had been one of the first to challenge the oppressive rule. Rather than quietly have the man executed, and possibly make him a martyr, Danzo had demoted him back down to a genin. He thought he could humiliate the man into backing down. On the surface, it probably looked like he was successful, but Gai was one of the first to join the resistance against the evil man.

“He said he found another former ANBU that might be loyal to Konoha. I just hope he’s being careful. If Danzo finds out about the curse marks…”

“Shh, he won’t. We’ve been careful. No one knows you’re the one who undid them. We made sure of that.” Kinoe pressed a soft kiss to his temple. “I won’t let anything happen to you, Iruka. If it wasn’t for you… I probably would still be Danzo’s weapon. I have a purpose now, protecting you and Naruto.”

Starbound (time)

A space AU, KakaIru:

“Why is a chunin teaching anyways? Isn’t that usually a civilian job?” He wanted to ask more, pry into Naruto’s life, but he was a coward. The more he found out, the more he would hate himself.

Iruka looked confused by the change of topics but didn’t comment on it. “It’s a pilot program they set up. They found that most children weren’t ready for becoming genin at such a young age out of regular schools, so they launched this program to teach them the skills they would need from a very young age. By the time they are fourteen and can take their genin exam, they have the skill set of seasoned genin. They will do much better in the field. I was chosen to teach the class. If it does well, it will be launched in several areas in Konoha and possibly down on Fire.”

Every child of Fire had a mandatory service period. From the ages of fourteen to eighteen, they were conscripts of the government. After that, they had the choice of staying in or going on to college or a trade school. They had set age limits to make sure young children weren’t forced into war zones like Kakashi had been at the tender young age of six. The days of the Third Great War were tough on everyone and child soldiers were common. After the war ended, the five major governments had agreed that no one under the age of fourteen could serve. An entire generation of children has=d been wiped out by the war.

Operation Gay Dads (around)

A Modern KakaIru AU where Naruto and Sasuke set up Kakashi and Iruka. Kakashi is raising Sasuke and Itachi. Iruka has been helping Naruto (who is in foster care):

“Same for Sasuke. I’ve never seen him take a liking to someone this quickly. I was glad when Jiraiya told me they were fostering a kid his age. I can’t force him to social in school, but I sure can here.” He chuckled a bit. “So I hear you’ve known Naruto for a long time. Met through some program?”

Iruka’s face lit up at the mention of work. “Yes. I work for a charity that helps foster children succeed in school. Everything from getting them supplies to tutoring them. I met Naruto when he was in elementary school. He was really struggling, but mostly because he didn’t have anyone to help him. He’s doing much better now. He’s been moved around a lot. He liked to pull pranks when he was younger and it got him kicked out of more than one home.” Iruka sighed, remembering how much he’d had to apologize for and beg for the nicer places to let him stay.

“It sounds like you really care about him. Why didn’t you take him in?” Kakashi looked away suddenly. “Sorry. That’s a really personal question.”

“It’s alright. I care because I was him. I was orphaned young. Pulled the same shit trying to get attention. I ended up in a good home, which is incredibly lucky, and my foster father helped me get my life together. Made sure I graduated. I would have taken Naruto in a heartbeat, but I had a lot of things against me. Age, single, gay, and while I love my job it’s just enough to support me. I would never qualify.” He just shrugged. “So I made sure I was there in other ways.”

Unnamed fic (pain)

Gai/Zabuza (rare pair), AU where Konoha’s greatest shinobi flee the village after Danzo takes control:

“You look like you could use some assistance, my friend!” Another man stepped forward. Judging by his ridiculous looks and outfit, this was Konoha’s Green Beast, Might Gai.

Zabuza’s hand tightened around the hilt of the Executioner’s Blade. He was in no shape to take them on, even if Haku wasn’t slowly bleeding out. He’d used too much chakra in the last fight. That, coupled with the numerous wounds he had, meant things were dire. He had to push aside the pain and deal with this new threat.

Gai flashed him a huge grin. “Thank you for taking care of those Root-nin for us. It is much appreciated!” He jumped down from the branch he was standing on and headed towards the bleeding man.

“Gai…” Kakashi said in warning, as he eyed Zabuza warily.

“It’s fine, my eternal rival. He isn’t going to hurt me.” Gai called over his shoulder.

“Bold words,” Zabuza growled at him. He didn’t want to set Haku down, but there was no way to fight the Leaf-nin while still holding him.

His words seemed to amuse the other man. “No need for threats. We are here to help.” He gestured for someone to join them. Zabuza tensed up as a blonde woman jumped down and headed towards them. “This is Tsunade. She is a healer of great renown and one of the legendary Sannin! She will take care of your friend.”

[silverfootstepswrites]

Butterfly [44]

summary The first steps are always the hardest.

“Shizune-sensei, your present was so thoughtful. But I’ve never even managed to cook decent rice before. It’s such a waste of all your nice notes,” lamented Sakura. Shizune and Kurenai sat at her desk with her. They laughed at her mournful tone. 

“Don’t be like that. Anyone can learn. Heck, even Uchiha-sensei came make curry,” Kurenai pointed out. 

“Only curry,” Shizune corrected.

“Only boxed curry,” added Itachi from across the room. 

“You’re going to get scurvy, Uchiha-sensei,” scolded Shizune. 

“There are vegetables in curry,” Sakura pointed out. Itachi nodded as Shizune let out a deep sigh. 

Shikamaru, who had been nursing a can of coffee, slowly sat up straight. Asuma turned to give him a questioning look. Not seeing Shikamaru slouching was like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs. Not unheard-of but a little odd. 

Shikamaru held a finger up in front of his lips. His eyes pointed toward Sakura before flickering over to Itachi. Back to Sakura.

Asuma’s eyebrows rose. Leaning forward, elbows resting on his knees, he mouthed, ‘Really?’. Shikamaru said nothing. Asuma considered this, nodding several times as he settled back in his seat. 

“Anyway, you’re worrying for nothing, Haruno-sensei. Everyone is horrible at cooking when they start,” replied Shizune.

“That’s true. I gave Dan-san food poisoning twice during our first year of marriage,” Tsunade spoke up. 

“My older brother tried to wash chicken with soap when we were children,” Gaara offered. 

“I burnt ramen once,” Kakashi sighed. 

There was a brief pause as everyone stared at Kakashi. He stared back at them. Unashamed.

“See? We all have to start somewhere. You didn’t just start knowing how to do calculus, right? You started with basic arithmetic, right?” Shizune explained. 

“Math is evil. Don’t bring it into this conversation,” muttered Shikamaru, almost under his breath. He didn’t manage to dodge in time to avoid Kurenai smacking his knee with her notebook. 

The day after Christmas, Sakura had gone to the post office. She retrieved a sizable stack of envelopes and parcels. There were even packages sent from overseas. She ran into Naruto on her way home. He helped her carry everything into her house, insisting that he take the heavier half. 

“I’m a man. That’s what men do,” Naruto bragged, flexing his right arm. 

Sakura glanced at him, trying not to laugh at him. “Oh, is that what men do?” she asked.

And Naruto gave a sheepish laugh of his own, scratching the back of his head as they stepped into her house. “Well, according to my old man. That and make bad jokes, apparently.”

Naruto helped her deposit everything in the corner of the kitchen. The packages sat untouched for a few days in the corner of the kitchen. Not because she wasn’t excited to open them. It was actually because she wanted to have time to read every message, to appreciate every little thing. 

When the weekend came, Sakura sat on the kitchen floor and began opening up all the envelopes. There were the usual drawings and signs with her name on them. Some were accompanied by letters. Others just had a name and a location. Sakura posted each of these to her Instagram story, tagging people when she could. 

Inside was a paper plate that had been colored gold with marker. There was a hole punched into either side of the plate. Someone had threaded red and blue yarn through the holes. The accompanying message was written in green marker:

You only have 6 gold medals from Worlds, but to me, you won 7 times.

Another message asked her if she was doing well. Whether she had been getting enough rest. 

I’m still very sad that you won’t be competing anymore. But I’m glad you’re finally taking some time off, it concluded. 

Another person wrote, Seeing you smile at the Grand Prix was so amazing. I hope you’re happy, whatever you’re doing now.

Of course, there were many more that pleaded for her to return. Begged her to come back, even. 

The kindnesses that poured out in every single message overwhelmed her. She had never gotten used to reading stuff like this. Even after all these years. Just to know that someone, somewhere, was thinking of her like this. Who loved her so much without having ever met her. Who rooted for her even when she had run away from everything like a coward. 

Tears welled up. Spilling. Clutching the letters to her chest, she began to sob. Chest heaving, clogged up with all the emotions that had built up since the Olympics. Since everything had turned a little sharp around the edges.

Itachi knocked on the door. He had felt uncomfortable just walking through the gate. Kiba and Shikamaru had assured him multiple times that it was fine just to shout. But that seemed to go against everything his mother had taught him. 

Knocking again, he shifted his weight to his other foot. He glanced down at the furoshiki-wrapped box in his hand. The cloth was yellow with a blue or purple flower design. He had a lot of trouble discerning between the two colors. Asuma had dropped it off earlier that morning with the excuse that his wife had made too much. When Itachi had opened it, he had found the box overflowing with toriten. Strips of chicken deep fried in tempura batter. His mouth began to water just looking into the box. 

“This is too much for me too, Sarutobi-sensei,” Itachi protested. 

Asuma had shrugged. “Find a friend to share it with?” he had suggested before walking off.

Itachi had messaged the group chat. Kiba and Shikamaru had agreed to meet up at Sakura’s. Even though she herself hadn’t read any of the messages. 

“Uh.... Haruno-san?” he called, knocking again. 

Itachi jolted when the window of the house next door rolled open. An old woman hung out, squinting at him. 

“She went to the rink!” the woman called. 

“Oh. Thank you, Chiyo-san,” Itachi replied.

Chiyo grunted before her head slipped back inside. The window sliding shut. That didn’t bother Itachi, though. Old woman Chiyo was notoriously grumpy. The only person she ever spoke to was Sakura, who mentioned that she helped the old woman weed her garden or change her lightbulbs when she needed it.

Itachi walked to the rink. He tried calling Sakura on the way, who didn’t pick up. 

Kushina greeted him at the counter of the ice rink. Her eyes darted in the direction of the door before flickering back to him. 

“Um...I.... I don’t know if I want to let you in there right now, Sensei,” she told him. 

Itachi blinked. “I’m sorry. Did I do something wrong?” he asked. 

Kushina blinked right back. And then she laughed. He could see where her son had inherited that full-bellied laugh from. She waved her hand at him as she replied, “Oh no! No no no. It’s not you.... it’s just...”

The laughter faded as she looked back toward the doors leading to the rink. Kushina put her hand on her cheek. 

“....Well... Sakura-chan came in crying. I... think she wants to be alone?” Kushina told him. 

“Oh. Well. I’ll ask her. And if she wants me to leave, I will,” replied Itachi. 

Kushina blinked several more times. As if that idea hadn’t even occurred to her. She said nothing as Itachi stepped out of the lobby, into the room next door. 

Music played from the speakers. Some kind of house music, playing so low that it was hard to make out the voices. Sakura lifted her chin when she heard the doors open and close. She sniffed. Her whole face felt heavy and swollen after the good she had had. She wiped her eyes with her wrists, letting her blades guide her in a meandering path 

Sakura spotted Itachi walk up to the rink. He didn’t rest his elbows up on the sides. He just stood there. 

Sakura did another lazy loop on the ice before she glided over to greet him. 

“Hi,” Itachi greeted her. His smile was tiny, almost like he wasn’t sure whether it was allowed.

Sakura sniffed again before she smiled as best as she could. “Hi.”

“I stopped by your place but you weren’t there,” he told her. 

“Oh.”

Sakura noticed that he was holding onto some kind of container. 

“...Do you want me to leave?” Itachi inquired. 

She looked back up at his face. Thinking it over for a second, she shook her head. 

“Would you feel better if you talked about it?” he then asked. 

She gave another wobbly smile at that. “Probably. But I don’t really want to,” she answered. 

“That’s fine,” Itachi replied. He looked around the rink. It was empty. Not even Naruto was sitting in the stands with his homework. 

“Do you mind if I stick around for a while?” He didn’t add that it was because he didn’t feel good leaving her alone. Sakura looked him over for a long moment. And then she shrugged.

Itachi sat on the bleachers, glad that he was wearing such a warm jacket. It was much colder in here than it was outside. He marveled at how Sakura could run around in a sleeveless shirt and look completely fine. In fact, she wiped sweat from the back of her neck as she moved past. 

The song changed. Sakura made a face. She shuffled through a few tracks until she settled on one. 

Itachi was no expert on skating. He had understood growing up that it was a sport that his mother loved. And he had known that it required a tremendous amount of athleticism. But watching Sakura up close, he began to understand why his mother was so obsessed. It was a particular blend of grace and power. Combined with the fact that this was all accomplished balancing on a metal blade made it all the more impressive. 

“I saw you once. When I was a university student,” Itachi suddenly told her. The words spilled out, almost accidentally. 

Sakura’s head turned in his direction. 

“On TV?” she asked. His chin was in his hand as he watched her. 

“In Sendai. I saw you practicing once. I met your coach and he brought me to watch you,” explained Itachi. Sakura’s eyebrows rose. She slowed. 

“I thought you went to school in Tokyo. What were you doing in Sendai?” she demanded. 

To her surprise, the smile melted off his face. Itachi clasped his hands together, elbows resting on his knees. She drew closer and closer. Until she stood at the edge of the rink, hands gripping the top of the barrier. 

“I told you that I studied scenography,” he said. Sakura nodded. 

“Uh, well, I was top of my class. I was really well-known for my backgrounds. Especially if they were painted. I grew up hearing that I might even be a genius,” Itachi explained. Sakura’s eyes were glued to him now. 

“And... during my junior year, I got into an accident. And I became partially colorblind.”

A gasp slipped out of Sakura. Her hand rose to cover her mouth. Itachi wasn’t looking at her now. He looked down at his feet. 

“I couldn’t create anything. I mean, how could I? It all looked.... wrong,” he went on. The past came back to him in waves now. It surprised him how easily it returned.

“I became very depressed. I took a break from school. All I did was go to work and drink. Mostly drink, honestly. And then, after about a year, a senpai from school made me visit him in Sendai. We ran into your coach by accident there and he ended up bringing us to watch you. He gave me some good advice.”

“What was the advice?” Sakura’s voice came out in a whisper.

Itachi finally looked up at her. He was smiling again. 

“That life goes on. Even if you can’t do the thing that you love most. Some little girl might write you a letter asking you to be her coach. And she might go on to win an Olympics gold medal,” he answered her.

She turned away from him. So he wouldn’t see the fresh tears gathering in her eyes. She didn’t care that he could hear her sniffling. He didn’t say anything about either. 

It was nearly an hour before Sakura felt ready to get off the ice. She wiped the snow from her blade and then slipped the flexible guards onto them. As she sat on a bench to unknot her laces, Itachi hopped of the bleachers to join her. 

“I quit skating because I’m getting old,” she said in such a small voice that Itachi wasn’t sure if he was meant to hear it. But then she glanced at him, meeting his eyes. So he sat down next to her. She resumed loosening the laces on her boot. 

“I know 27 might not seem old. But it’s really old for a skater. Especially a woman,” she explained. She finished with the left and moved on to the right. 

“I’ve seen it over and over. The top skaters get old and they go from first to fifth in competitions. It’s so embarrassing to watch,” she went on. She yanked her boots off both feet. She took a moment to flex her toes. 

“I just.... I didn’t want to go out that way. I didn’t want anyone to pity me. I wanted to be remembered as the best. It’s sort of cowardly, now that I think about it,” she trailed off into a mumble. She reached into her duffel bag to pull out her sneakers. 

“That makes sense to me. Although, I don’t know how much my input matters,” Itachi offered. Sakura suddenly looked at him. She smiled. 

“It matters,” she replied. 

She held his gaze for a long moment. But before either of them could say anything, Sakura’s phone rang. The vibrations buzzed through the whole bench. She picked it up. Kiba’s face lit up the screen. She swiped her finger across the screen. 

“Oi! I’ve been shouting outside your house forever. Open up!” he scolded her. 

“...I’m not at my house, Inuzuka,” she told him. 

“Sorry, Inuzuka-san. We ended up at the rink. We’ll be there soon,” Itachi called. Kiba sputtered something. And then there was rustling and crackling over the phone. Sakura and Itachi exchanged a look of confusion. 

“Oi!” Kiba shouted. 

“We’ll wait around. Hurry up before Inuzuka starts eating the grass,” Shikamaru said into the phone. They could hear Kiba grumbling in the background. But his voice was muffled, as if Shikamaru was holding him by the face. 

New Years passed by so quickly that Sakura almost couldn’t believe that another year had gone by. Her mailbox was filled with cards from all around the world. Karin, Suigetsu, and Mangetsu sent her a photo of them posing in front of a lion statue. Haku and Kisame sent along a card too, wishing her a happy new year. She received more from people all around the world. Ino, Utakata, even some of the old friends she thought would have forgotten all about her. 

New Years Eve was spent at the Sarutobi household. Mirai fell asleep long before midnight, as did Asuma. Snoring away on the couch with his daughter sprawled out on top of his belly. Neither of them woke as Sakura and Kurenai snapped photos of them with their phones. Even with their not-so-quiet giggling.

Shikamaru and Kiba spent the holiday with their respective families. Even Itachi took a train up to stay with his family for a few days. Sakura was glad that Kurenai and Asuma had invited her. Spending New Years alone in her house would have been the nightmare scenario. Although she had a suspicion that if the Sarutobi’s hadn’t taken her in, another family definitely would have. This was Konoha, after all.

When school resumed, Sakura couldn’t put her finger on it. But something felt different. 

The same coworkers smiled at her during the morning meeting. The library had the same, papery, dusty smell. She ran her fingers over the mural of gingko leaves at the far end of the library as she walked past it. She checked her plants on the windowsill. 

The answer didn’t come to her until halfway through the morning. When the library doors opened. Sakura sat on the ladder behind one of the bookshelves. The shelves blocked her line of sight to the door. So she waited until the footsteps drew closer. 

Itachi looked up at her. His glasses rested on top of his head, tangled with his hair. He wore a navy blue shirt covered with a pattern of white paper airplanes. He had folded the sleeves twice, revealing his forearms. 

“Working hard?” he asked. 

“Sort of,” she replied.

And he smiled the way he always did. Only, she found it a little difficult to look him directly in the eyes when he did. 

Clearing her throat, Sakura quickly finished reshelving the last book in her lap. As she turned and began climbing down, Itachi grasped the railing to steady the ladder. She brushed against his arm as she descended. It suddenly felt a little too warm in the library. Maybe the janitor had messed with the thermostat in the morning?

“I just came by to let you know that Shizune-sensei brought in cookies. You should grab them from the faculty room before they disappear,” Itachi informed her.

“Okay! Thank you,” she replied, straightening out the remaining books in the cart. 

She was almost relieved when the bell rang. Itachi glanced down at his watch. 

“Yikes. I have a class. I’ll see you later,” Itachi remarked. Sakura nodded at him without saying anything. All she could do was watch him as he strode across the library, her head tilting a little as she noticed the way his fingertips skimmed over one of the tables as he passed it. He slid the door shut behind him. Slowly, she could hear footsteps and students and teachers began moving in the hallway. The snippets of their conversation and laughter filtering in through the thin walls. 

Sakura’s eyes widened as she finally realized why she recognized this feeling. A little nervous. A little floaty. 

“Oh no,” she gasped. 

“No no no no no,” she said over and over as she hit her head against the side of the ladder. She let out a groan as she rubbed her hands over her face. 

“Not this shit again,” she sighed.

[augment-techs]

Accidentally read your diary AU - NaruSaku (where Sakura reads Naruto's diary?)

Naruto: Fourteen paper ramen rappers, as clean as can be expected in the early days before leaving with Jiraiya to try and make things better for everyone; Okay, so here it goes with keeping a diary journal that nobody would find, because I am an awesome ninja of Konoha in the making…Sasuke is a huge jerk, Shikamaru and Kiba and Chouji aren’t so bad even if they kind of ignore me when we’re not playing hooky, Hinata is…weird…Ino is pretty, but really loud, and Sakura-chan is cute but scary (my head hurts because i said the wrong thing and her aim is as good as her arm when she’s mad).Seven old newspapers in tatters and covered in rainwater, slightly newer from the return from training, and slightly older from when he was getting lessons on something that would allow him to beat Neji; I have no idea how to feel about this white haired pervert that’s supposed to be training me for the next battle, but the stuff he showed me is pretty cool so… Kakashi took off with Sasuke to learn stuff that I bet’s a lot cooler, but he says it’ll all work out so at least when the bastard comes back, our fight at the end will be awesome!! …Kinda wondering where Sakura-chan went today. I haven’t actually seen her since I started training, but maybe Kakashi left her with another Jounin so she isn’t all alone and is getting more awesome, too (note to self: make sure her bruises aren’t still there and if they are, go yell at the medical staff that were supposed to help)!Three tiny orange sticky notes, two yellow sticky notes, five red sticky notes, from around the time when Gaara was attacked and Sasuke made it obvious he wasn’t coming home on his own power and the Akatsuki were more dangerous than first assumed; That bastard, that bastard, that bastard… Glad Gaara’s okay after all, even if it’s a shame that Granny Chiyo had to die to make him better, but at least Gaara knows he’s really not alone anymore–his siblings, man… Sai and Yamato-sensei are just. so. weird. but I guess they’re really not so bad if you ignore that Sai does not have a filter at all (he’s trying, I guess?) …I didn’t know that Sakura-chan got a sword through her goddamn guts when fighting that creepy scorpion bastard and am trying to figure out how I felt when she was changing and I saw her painful looking wicked scar (This just in: I’m really proud, but also REALLY MAD)…Multiple pieces of paper that ranged from anywhere between being stolen from Sai’s notebook, Yamato’s spare mission report statements, the one blank page in the back of Kakashi’s Icha Icha, unusable exploding tags from Sasuke’s weapon pouch and prescription pad papers from Sakura’s office that had expired; all of them mostly following the end of the war and the fulfillment of a prediction of the future; It looks like everything’s gonna be okay right now… Sasuke-bastard says he can’t stay in Konoha, he has to “redeem” himself, but he’ll at least stay in contact unlike the last time… Who made the decision to make Kakashi-sensei the next Hokage?! ARE THEY CRAZY? …~Sai’s got a girlfriend, Sai’s got a girlfriend~ (and it’s Ino and it’s really weird and I guess I’m happy for him, but good luck dude)… Yamato and Gai seem to be hanging out with Kakashi-sensei a lot since he became Hokage (are they doing all of his paperwork? Must look into this)… Sakura-chan has not been resting all that much since becoming the head of the hospital–I AM TAKING HER FOR RAMEN AND THAT IS THAT!!Sakura: Collecting all the little pieces of paper she can find with Naruto’s handwriting, after wandering into his apartment to help him pack. They had agreed to split rent on a two bedroom with a view nearer the Hokage tower after Kakashi told them that Naruto should get a move on learning everything he’d need in order to take up the mantle and chiding Sakura for wearing herself down to a thread trying to keep up with healing as many people as she was given each day in the hospital. His writing is terrible, and he’d never be an award winning novelist, but she supposed that since his birthday was coming up, she could bind all of his old words together into something that could pass as a journal… And give him a new, whole one to boot.

[queeranarchist]

Dear Writer

Hey!! Glad you made your way here;  whatever you end up going with I hope you have heaps of fun making it!

Feel free to look through my letter tag for previous exchanges! I tend to nom the same things and am 100% down for any of my previous prompts, and of course feel free to mix and mash and/or write something you want to!

General Likes: Trans characters, queer themes, queer solidarity, character development, strong gen. relationships and interactions with characters outside of a relationship, dialogue driven story, non-linear narrative, animals, angst, hurt/comfort

DNW: underage, a/b/o

Final Fantasy

Likes: fics that include the whole gang, trans Gladio, anything with Prompto, angst about destiny, angst about royal linage

Prompt One: I really like angsty fics about destiny with this lot - I would love to see how the way in which they’ve been raised effects their relationship, be it being groomed to be king or shield or advisor. I would love a getting together fic, with whichever ship you wish to write, with a lot of internal angst.

Prompt Two: I would also love a post cannon fic where Noctis is alive (magic, never died, skip over it entirely it’s up to you) where they all settle down, maybe Noctis lets the world think he has died so he can live a peaceful life?

Prompt Three: I would like to see a fic of Prompto integrating himself into Noctis’ life, Gladio and Ignis have been around his entire life, so how does Prompto feel about them? How do they feel about him? Honestly I’m 100% here for awkward insecure bby Prompto

Prompt Four: Set between game cannon and Brotherhood, I‘d be down to see what these guys got up to in the years between high school and the road trip. Did Prompto and Noctis study after high school? Do they travel? 

Naruto

Likes: the summons, Rock Lee, the squads and how they operate, Naruto getting to eat the ramen he deserves, Sakura being an actual bad arse fleshed out character

Sasuke/Naruto

Prompt One: Naruto leaves and joins Sasuke on his mission to destroy to Leaf, talks him out of y’know murdering everyone but agrees that the Shinobi system is deeply fucked and needs to be fixed

Prompt Two: I’d like a fic of Sasuke thinking about Naruto while doing all his plotting, be it set when he’s with Orochimaru or the Akatsuki, it would be nice to see him thinking about Naruto, wanting to stop doing so, wondering how strong he could have been if he had managed to kill him and gain the mangekyou earlier

Gai/Kakashi

Prompt One: I’d like a fic set just before Kakashi gets his genin, really love to see Gai trying to talk up how cool having a squad is! Dragging Kakashi to see his kids and being like aren’t my team great! And then Team Gai getting into some crazy hijinks that make Kakashi a lil scared about the future but also maybe a bit endeared towards them

Prompt Two: a fic of Gai watching Kakashi slowly loose himself while in ANBU, of him trying to make things right and not being able to and then eventually asking him to be removed from the forces

My Hero Academia

Likes: Students being involved in the story, them having a cat, them being very close forever and living together, domesticity

Prompt One: I’d love a fic set after these two graduate where they are setting themselves up as new heroes. I’d like an awkward getting together fic, where they are both mutually oblivious to one another – honestly down with something as cliché as oh we are sharing an apartment to save money and I mean mattresses are also expensive so maybe we can also share one. I really like fics with Midnight and Tensei as their friends, especially when both of them are like…you guys are clearly in love maybe uhh do something about that and both Mic and Aizawa are like oh no he couldn’t possibly feel the same way

Prompt Two: …they adopt a cat. You can set this wherever you want and play this however you want I just rlly think they deserve a cat

Stardew Valley

Likes: world building, farm creatures, small town hijinks

Prompt One: Abigail ropes them into a mysterious quest which they agree on because there is nothing else to do in town. They discover the hidden woods, become very very scared and have to cling to each other for uhh moral support. They realise they may want to hold hands again the next day

Prompt Two: and established relationship fic which is more based on Abigail & sam & seb. The three of them decide to pull a prank

[midgetmeredith]

hi~ i read your about page where you said you might write up your reasons for not liking some ft ships like the whole debate with fraxus/miraxus & chendy/rowen but i couldn't find anything on it on your blog so i wondered what were your thoughts on that? i know there's fandom arguments about homophobia and crackshipping there too. i’m a multishipper but i really like your anti posts for naruto so i thought if you had any ft ones then they might be as good! �

Thank you! I’m really glad youthat like my Naruto posts. They’re pretty controversial, so nice commentsare always appreciated! 😅 Dude, I haven’t updatedby ‘about’ page in months, so doing that write-up completely passedmy mind… Thanks for being interested though! I guess I’ll spill:

Right, this might be quitecontroversial, so remember that any opinions expressed are just personalpreferences/reasons, okay? ⚠️

Like I said on my page, “Ihave a ‘manga > anime’ complex thanks to Studio Pierrot, so I only readFT. I wanted to avoid filler brainwashing, bias and only know of canon withthis series, after the mess with Naruto…” Therefore, I only really ship thatwhich I believe is substantially depicted/suggested in canon, and kind of havea bit of a pet peeve for anything outside of that.[ #1 justificationdisclaimer! ]

( 1 ) Mir/axus [ &Fraxus ]

So I was genuinelysurprised that Mir/axus was even a thing when I started searching the fandom’s tag, onceI’d caught up. I don’t know if they’ve been implied in filler, but theywere non-existent as a romantic pair in the manga. Honestly, theyhardly had any on-panel interaction… Like, the only evidence that came tomind for “logical” reasoning behind them was chapter 380’s cover art.(Maybe 329’s, at a push.) I even tried to find somesupposed “moments” under their Wikia page, but that listed was merelyscarce interaction with no romantic subtext; each synopsis was pretty muchgrasping for straws.

Here’s the thing –you mentioned the fandom discourse of “homophobic” accusations,right? Now, I too hate when shippers (in any fandom) cry that simplybecause others don’t ship a queer pairing. Like, c’mon. But, inthis case (and Wendy’s), I must admit that I do find it somewhatrelevant… Idk if this ship’s popularity (and, more so, acceptance alongsidethe actual semi-canon pairs) is because most have been influenced byexternal material or if it’s just because there’s no other member of the opposite sex that they’re paired with, but Fraxus was actually suggested in canon; emphaticallyfrom Freed’s point of view! Even on Laxus’ side, numerous chapters have moments that – here’s the thing – anyone would undeniablyaccept if either Freed or Laxus were female*.

[ My earlier volumes are enclosed in my bookcase, but I have 49 – 57 (Avatar – Alvarez) on-hand beside my bed, so I skimmed through to find (max.) five pages to evidence Laxus’ P.O.V. ‘cause this post will already be long enough. ]

Chapter 416: “At this rate, I won’t be able to protect what’s important to me.”

It’s also worth noting that the official tankōbon/volume translation of this reads: “I’m not strong enough to protect the people I love yet.”

Chapter 460.

Chapter 462: “But that ain’t important now. All I’ve got on my mind… Is bringing the pain to the bastard who took out Freed and the others.”

Chapter 472: “So you’re the one who did a number on Freed and the others?”

Chapter 473: “Thanks a lot, Freed… There’s no wizard that could break your spells…”

*That’s the key consideration – that if you were to replace either’s gender for that of the opposite sex, it changes how these scenes are perceived. These panels, for example, are dismissed by those who oppose Fraxus, but they would be regarded as “ship moments” and a validation of Laxus’ affection if you were to replace Freed’s name in the dialogue and/or presence in the panels with a female (Mira)!

That’s why I can kind ofunderstand these claims, ’cause the existence and general fandomacceptance of these ships is very heteronormative in that respect (i.e.ignoring present queer pairings for heterosexual ‘crack-ships’) which makes it kind of discriminatory; reminiscent of homophobia perhaps. Although, I agree that term is a little extreme, as it doesn’t seem intentionally prejudiced. And whilst Freed is emphatically portrayed as queer, Laxus’ sexualityis a little more implicit, yet he is assumed straight by default… It’sironic/hypocritical because the majority of ships across all fandoms are typically founded upon onecharacter’s feelings, whilst neither Mira nor Laxus have shown said romanticinterest in each-other.

( 2 ) Ro/Wen [ &Chendy ]

Again, I hate Ro/Wen dueto a similar reasoning. Finding out that they even existed as a ship wasbaffling, tbh! I mean, at least Mir/axus had the cover as some rationale,but Ro/Wen is based solely on them being the same age… Talk aboutheteronormative? Also, technically, that’s an incorrect claim, due to the sevenyear time-skip in which she remained frozen. Like, she’s actually thesame age as Sting & Rogue. But you don’t find her forced with them. Why,because they’re older and that’s frowned upon? You know, despite the samepremise applying to Ro/Wen; since Romeo was half Wendy’s age when she wasintroduced (6 & 12).

The ship can’t even besupported with evidence, since they had no significant canoninteraction until the Alvarez Arc. Their only other contact was in an omake.Yet their age difference is evident in both; dismissing any reach atromantic subtext. In the omake, Romeo refers to Wendy as “nee[-chan]”.Similarly, she is presented comforting him like a child in their limited Alvarez panels, with him lookingup to her as that same sister figure. I have seen some of these shippers disregard Chendy asbeing “platonic”, when Romeo and Wendy’s dynamic isactually – canonically and strictly – such.

Chendy, however, do have asubstantial, visibly and literally present, mutual bond. They have extensive,plentiful interaction, as well as actually present romanticsubtext… I know that it may be difficult for (I guess) anyone outside of theLGBT+ community or a truly ‘open’ one to understand, due to ourheteronormative society – as Chendy are often disregarded as “justfriends” (🙄) – but many of theirmoments transcend platonic affection and bear intense likeness to theother romantic pairs’ depictions. For example, they are also featuredalongside the semi-canon couples in art-work, like Mashima’s couple sketches onTwitter.

Not to mention thatfriendship is the foundation of any healthy, romantic relationship! Of coursethey’re going to be best friends before engaging in such, particularly in thecase of same-sex pairs. Yet no-one uses this dialogue (of labellingeach-other as “friends”) against NaLu, despite them stating the otheras that same description on numerous occasions. But despite the justification mentioned above,Chendy are still dismissed. Again, if either were the male, it would be a completely different situation… I mean, since people shipcharacters based solely on covers and all – chapter 421’s cover (amongothers)?

Summary:

Obviously there’s nothingwrong with crack-shipping! And, no, not liking a queer pair [more than astraight one] doesn’t make you “homophobic”. But – in the case ofFraxus 🆚 Mir/axus& Chendy 🆚 Ro/Wen –I think that there is something kind of messed up with arrogantly defying acharacter’s canon depicted/suggested sexuality and/or romantic interest(s).There is something somewhat discriminatory about disregarding theirother prevalent, significant and actually developed bonds, to the extent that someone’sheteronormativity is so severe that they substitute a same-sex character foran irrelevant one of the opposite sex, who does not even have decentinteraction with the character in question; fabricated entirely from theridiculous, inaccurate [R/W] rationale of them being “the same age” or merelysharing a chapter cover.

That sounds much harsherthan I intended, I’m so sorry! Btw, I don’t blame shippers –everyone is (obviously) allowed to ship what they want! What’s stated above issimply why I’m against Mir/axus and Ro/Wen, especially as an avidsupporter of the LGBTQ+ community, a bisexual myself and a university scholar who has studied/written about this field.

[ I’ve updated by ‘about’ page now too, btw! ]

[dragnoodles]

Not everyone who is going on about how thankful they are that FT is ending are hating the manga/series as a whole. Not everyone is posting it in the main tag, either. And even then, some of us just want to see how it does actually end, so that's reason enough to still be here. Plus, people are generally allowed to express their opinions, whether they be positive or negative. Most of us who are glad it's ending aren't actually trying to ruin the final moments for those who do love it.

I get your point (I mean, ironically I’m also one of the people that mostly just stay for the ending, since I’m not really a fan of the last few arcs) and I don’t have anything against people expressing their opinions. I’ve seen many posts where people made valid points about why they are disappointed (and hey, I agree, I’m SUPER disappointed with the final fight and this whole arc myself, for example). I’ve seen many posts saying how great the manga as a whole is, and while I don’t agree with it myself either, I get it, we all have different tastes and some people may think this manga is a masterpiece. I don’t judge. But when I see the tag being filled up with TONS of “I’m glad this shit is over” posts, it just makes me sad, not to mention tired. It’s probably just that I already experienced a few series ending (like naruto or bleach for example) and I’m just really tired of the overwhelming negativity I see (mostly on tumblr) every time. If people want to complain, go ahead, but as for me I want to remember the series for all the good stuff and end it on a positive note.

The things I said in the tags were directed only towards people who are being jerks and try to ruin the fun for everybody, not the ones that just express their (personal) opinions.

[isolavirtuosa]

Post-Post Traumatic: 10 Years Later, Happily Ever After 7-8

Post-Post Traumatic [fanfiction] NaruSasu (in progress)

A series of “drabbles” following the events of Post Traumatic.

Previous Parts

10 Years Later, Happily Ever After

Parts 1-2

Parts 3-4

Parts 5-6

Parts 7-8 under the cut

- 7 -

             We all stood around Getsuko’s unconscious body, waiting.

           “Do you think it’ll hold?” Sakura finally ventured.

           “If it doesn’t, we’re fucked,” Kurotsuchi commented.

           “Thank you for your invaluable input, Tsuchikage,” Q said.

           Everyone stared at him.  A had finally stepped down as the raikage, and Kumogakure had put a young unknown in his place.  It was like having your bratty kid brother tag along everywhere, or so Itachi would probably say.

           “When does she wake up?” Hanabi asked, crouching down beside Getsuko and smoothing her white hair from her eyes.

           “Probably days,” Sakura said.  “Or months. Or hours.”

           “You guys are really nailing it today,” Q said.

           I blew the smoke from my cigarette in his direction.

           He coughed and glared at me.

           I shrugged.

           Naruto elbowed me, but looked amused.  Then the look drained from his eyes as they refocused on Getsuko.

           “We’ll take her to a secure facility,” Kakashi said softly from where he was sitting at the edge of the crowd.

           I looked at him.  “You will not seal her eyes.”

           “As long as it’s not necessary.”

           “You will not seal her eyes,” I repeated, a growl rumbling up my throat.

           Naruto took my hand and cradled it to his chest.

           Kakashi gave me a sad smile.  “It’s interesting how you’ve changed.”

           “How the hell have I changed?” I asked petulantly.  Kakashi still made me feel like a child.

           “Let’s go, Hanabi,” he said.

           Hanabi moved to pick up Getsuko.

           “That girl is a citizen of the Land of Lightning and you’re not taking her anywhere,” Q said.

           The other kages had expressions with varying degrees of annoyance.

           Sakura groaned, dropping her head in her hands.  “We already decided-” she started.

           “No, you decided,” Q said.  “The Konoha alliance, always doing whatever Naruto says.”

           “I didn’t say anything,” Naruto said, his voice calm, but the red glow around his body giving away his anger.

           “Everything always has to revolve around Konoha like it’s the center of the world, and it’s not,” Q said.  “She’s ours, and you have no right to take her.”

           “Your country abused her,” Naruto spat out.

           I caught his arm and pulled him back.  “Let’s go.”

           He turned to me, confusion muddling his anger.

           “We’ve done everything we came here to do,” I said.  “Kaguya is sealed inside Getsuko, and there isn’t anything else for us to do.”

           “But-” he tried to protest.

           “Leave it to them,” I said, pulling his arm sharply.

           He could have resisted, but he let me pull him.  “Sasuke, we can’t just-”

           “Listen to your girlfriend, Naruto,” Q said.

           “I will eviscerate you,” I hissed, my hands already forming a jutsu.

           Naruto pulled me back this time, murmuring soothing nonsense.

           B, who had been silent the whole time, stepped beside Q.

           Hanabi cradled Getsuko protectively in her arms.

           “Leave it to them,” I said, embarrassed that I’d let that little upstart get to me.  Seriously fuck him, though.  Naruto’s girlfriend.  I was projecting an air of calm, but anger was thrumming through me.

           Naruto surprised me by suddenly doing the Advanced Flying Thunder God Technique, transporting us back home.

           “You listened to me,” I said, trying not to sound shocked.

           “I don’t know if it was the right thing to do,” Naruto said slowly. “Should I go back?”

           “No.”

           “Sasuke…”

           “The world needs to learn how to survive without you.  If it can’t, then oh well.”

           “Did you really just ‘oh well’ the end of the world?”

           “You’re going to die eventually, you know.”

           “Oh. My.  God.”

           “I just want you to stop inflating your self-importance.”

           “You are the worst husband in the world.  Like in the actual world.”

           “Good.”

           “What the hell do you mean, ‘good’?!”

           “You’re back,” Jugo said from the doorway.

           “We are,” I agreed.

           “Sasuke wants me to die!” Naruto exclaimed, gesturing wildly.

           “I didn’t say that I wanted it, I said that you were going to.”

           Jugo’s brow furrowed.  “Did something go wrong with the seal?”

           “Huh?” Naruto said.  “No, that was fine.  Probably. We left after it was done.”

           “So it’s over?”

           “As long as Kaguya doesn’t break out of the seal,” I said.  I sat down on the bed abruptly, feeling my leg buckle.

           “Hey,” Naruto said, sitting next to me and pulling my right leg up across his lap. “Does it still hurt?  And don’t say it’s fine.”

           “It’s not bad.”

           “That isn’t funny, jerk,” he complained, pushing my bloody pant leg up and rubbing over the ashy gash on my leg with his chakra.  “Why didn’t you tell me it was this deep?”

           “We had other things to worry about,” I said, trying not flinch as the bone started to reset itself.

           “Should I go slower?”

           “No.”

           Naruto went slower anyway, trying to make it hurt less.

           “Did you get a boo-boo?” Mikio asked, appearing out of nowhere and peering at my leg.

           “Yeah,” I said.

           “It must hurt a lot,” he said.  He climbed up onto the bed and hugged my waist.

           “Naruto’s making it better,” I said, resting my hand on the top of his head.

           “I’ll give you my hug power.”

           “Thank you.”  I wasn’t even being ironic when I said it.  I had become the kind of person who appreciated hug power.  It was awful.

           One kid quickly turned into two, and then the whole brood was crowded into our room.

           And then the night went on like we hadn’t just fought an epic battle to save the world.

           I smoked my after-dinner cigarette outside with Jugo, talking business.  The brats ran around like zoo animals, Naruto in the thick of it, disturbing the desert quiet.

           “Is everything really okay?” Jugo finally asked.

           “As okay as things will ever be,” I said.

           “How was Getsuko?”

           “Unconscious.”

           “But she’ll be okay?”

           “She should be,” I said.  “The seal that Hanabi created… she’s not bad.”

           “You could say that she’s good.”

           “I could.”

           Jugo shook his head.

           “She would make a suitable hokage,” I offered.

           “Is Getsuko staying with her?”

           “I think so.”

           “It would be nice if Getsuko came and visited once she’s recovered.”

           I shrugged.

           “I think the kids would like that.  And I would, too.  We all care about her.”

           “Yeah, I got it.”

           “You care about her, too.”

           “What’s your point?”

           “Sasuke, your act is getting a little tired.”

           “Fuck you.”

           Jugo shrugged.

           “I don’t have an act,” I muttered.

           He snorted.

           “Did you just snort at me?”

           Jugo smiled.

           I bumped shoulders with him.

           He surprised me by pulling my head to rest on his shoulder.  “Stop being so reckless.”

           I cast my eyes up at him.

           “You’re always coming home hurt…”

           “Because I’m the only one with the balls to fight a little girl.”

           “Only you would call the most powerful ninja in existence a little girl.”

           “What is going on here?!” Naruto demanded, glaring at us.

           “I’m stealing Sasuke from you,” Jugo deadpanned.

           I smirked.

           “How could you?!” Naruto mock-cried, throwing his arms around my waist.

           His nonsense was immediately ended by a pig-pile of children.

           I limped a little as I went up the stairs to bed.

           “Let me see,” Naruto said, pawing at my pajama pants.

           “This is the worst seduction you’ve ever tried.”

           He leveled me with a look.

           I lifted my hips and slid the pants down very slowly.

           Naruto looked away and swallowed.

           “Pervert,” I said.

           “You’re the one putting on a show!”

           I stretched my leg out to him.

           He rubbed it, pushing some healing chakra into it.  “I don’t have a lot left,” he said apologetically.

           “It doesn’t hurt much now,” I said.  “It’ll heal on its own fine.”

           “I don’t want you to hurt at all.”

           “You are so cheesy.”

           “How is that cheesy?!”

           “Hey, you’re using too much chakra,” I said, pushing his hand away.  “I’m okay.  I’m not just saying it, I am.”

           “Okay,” he said, leaning in to kiss me.  “I know you’re really strong and not fragile at all, but I just worry irrationally.”

           “You are certainly irrational,” I agreed.

           “You’ve been so feisty since you went off your meds,” he said, getting into bed.

           “And your masochistic ass loves it,” I said, deciding not to take offense at the word ‘feisty’.

           “God help me, it does,” he sighed into his pillow.  “You’re so smart and quick and clever.”

           “Yes,” I agreed.

           “And so easy to seduce with compliments.”

           “Like you ever even try to seduce me.”

           “Your cracks on our sex life are starting to hurt me.”

           “Everything I do hurts you,” I muttered, rolling over and spooning him. “You know how I feel about you.”

           “Yeah, it’d just be nice if you said it once in a while.”

           “Gross.”

           “You are so mean.”

           “I know.”

           “If you know the problem, then correct the behavior!”

           “Don’t wanna.”

           “You are too cute sometimes,” Naruto said, cradling my arm to his chest.

           “’M not cute,” I murmured, sleepily nipping at the back of his neck.

           Naruto turned over, pressing his forehead to mine.  “Whatever the word is then.  You make my insides go all fluttery.”

           “You are so gay.”

           “Uh, duh.”

           “I’m glad you’re gay,” I hummed.  “I thought you were straight for so long.”

           “I thought so, too,” he said with a little laugh.  “But who wouldn’t go gay for Uchiha Sasuke?”

           “I know I would,” I said, half asleep.

           Naruto’s laugh rumbled through his chest.

           In the morning, he promised me that he was retiring.

           “I can be a stay-at-home dad,” he said, and he looked happy about it, happier than he’d ever looked about being the hokage.

           “You don’t actually live with your children,” I pointed out.

           He looked at me aghast.  “Don’t let our kids hear you say that.”

           I rolled my eyes.

           “But hey, so Kurotsuchi was telling me about this boy from their village. He’s a chuunin, has a strong affinity with wind.  She said he’s looking for a teacher…”

           “You’re a good teacher,” I said, kissing his temple and leaving it at that.

           It took time.

           Naruto kept running back to Konoha to hover over Getsuko’s shoulder.  When he accepted that the seal was working and that she wanted him to stop stalking her, he decided to hover over Hanabi’s shoulder while she started preparing to take his place.  She pretty much chased him out of Konoha.

           “She told me that I’m meddlesome,” he complained.  “And a micromanager.  I don’t even know what that means!”

           “You’re stepping down next month,” I said.  “Maybe you should try, you know, stepping a little farther away.”

           “But they need me!”

           “I need you.  These kids need you.  Konoha doesn’t give a fuck about you.”

           “Why do you have to be so damn cynical?” he complained.

           I stared at him.

           Naruto sighed, running his fingers through my hair.  “If you’re gonna keep growing it, you should put it in a ponytail.”

           I raised an eyebrow.

           “It’d be hot.”

           I raised the other eyebrow.

           He grinned at me goofily.

           I rolled my eyes.

           “Hey,” he said, his grin getting wider.

           “What?”

           “Guess who’s coming to my retirement-slash-Hanabi’s-coronation?”

           “Should I care?” I asked dismissively.

           “It’s you, stupid,” he said, brows knotting in irritation.

           “Oh, okay then, let me just cross the border and watch all the ANBU try and subdue me.”

           He grabbed me by the hair, enough to feel it but not enough to really hurt.

           My breath sped up a little.

           “I am telling you that the Counsel is going to overturn your exile,” he said, face close to mine.

           “That’s not possible,” I said.  Kakashi had told me as much.

           “All things are possible when Naruto is the hokage.”

           “You’ve been the hokage for ten fucking years and you haven’t been able to get the Counsel to budge.”

           “Why are you being such a jerk today?”

           “I wasn’t aware that making honest statements made me a jerk.”

           “Sasuke,” he whined.

           I took a breath and let it out.  I could feel his fingers pressing into the back of my neck, and I wished he’d pull harder.

           “You’re having weird masochistic thoughts,” he said.

           “So?”

           He kissed my nose, letting go of my hair.  “You better start packing for Konoha.”

           “It’s not for a month,” I said.  “And who says I even want to go?”

           “Yurina and Tsubaki,” he said, walking away.

           Of course I went.

 - 8 -

             Our entire family was there to watch Naruto pass that fashion faux pas of a hat over to Hanabi.

           “And now Naruto-sensei will stay awake in the bath?” Mikio asked from my shoulders.

           “Probably,” I said, watching as Hanabi turned from the crowd to say something to Sakura, the words ‘Shadow Hokage’ emblazoned on her back with no number. She’d be leaving the village soon, protecting Konoha from the outside like Naruto had done.

           Like Itachi had done.

           “This is really boring,” Ao complained.  “How many more speeches are they going to do?”

           “Like a million,” Suigetsu groaned.  “Can we sneak out?”

           “I’m all for it,” I said.  Despite being allowed into the village, I hadn’t exactly receive a warm welcome. Same old Konoha, full of glares and hostility.  Ditching their most important ceremony seemed to send the right kind of ‘fuck you’ message that I wanted to send.

           “Won’t Naruto-sensei be mad?” Sanma asked, looking between us all nervously.

           “He probably made a clone so he wouldn’t have to stand through these dumb speeches either,” Ao said.

           As soon as she said it, I narrowed my eyes at the Naruto standing on stage. “No, it’s really him,” I confirmed.

           “But you thought it might not be,” Ao said with a laugh.

           “I can’t deny that,” I said, eyeing a way through the crowd.  “Come on.”

           Sanma seemed conflicted.

           “I’m staying,” Jugo said, resting a hand on Sanma’s shoulder.

           I gave him a nod, and led the rest of the group out of the crowd.

           Of course we were stared at the whole way, but it felt so nice to be out of there.

           “God, I hate this stupid village,” I muttered.

           “Then how come you wanted to come so badly?” Mari needled me.

           I thought of my poor, poor nieces, who were trapped on the stage with their moms and dad, forced to be the good hokage kids.  This whole ceremony was a waste of my time, and I wished it was over.

           “I need a cigarette,” I said.

           “Gross,” Mikio said, pinching my cheeks.

           I couldn’t even be mad at him.  I really and truly had gone soft.  If the me at sixteen could only see me now.

           We really knew nothing as kids.

           I decided to scare the people of Konoha instead.  Most were at the ceremony, but I stared down the few passersby that we saw as we moved into the town.  They stared at the ground nervously, walking as far away from me as the width of the street allowed.

           All the shops were closed.

           “I hafta pee,” Riki said.

           “I want cotton candy!” Kanon declared.

           “Cotton candy!” the twins agreed.

           This was almost as annoying as the ceremony.

           Then Suigetsu strangely came to the rescue, getting Riki an alley to pee in and distracting the others with a game of tag spread out across the empty town.

           “When did Suigetsu get good with kids?” I asked Karin.

           “I think he’s practicing,” she said, staring out into the town from the stoop we were sitting on.

           “For wha-” I started to say, then recoiled.  “Are you serious?”

           “I’m knocked up,” she said, touching her stomach.

           “Congratulations?”

           “Yeah, I don’t really know how I feel about it either.”

           “Aren’t you kind of old to have a bab-” I tried to say and got kicked in the head.  “Bitch.”

           “The only bitch I see here is you.”

           “Fuck,” I said.

           “Fuck,” she agreed.

           “Go away so I can smoke.”

           “Maybe I’ll just follow you everywhere you go.”

           “Did Naruto put you up to this?” I asked suspiciously.  “Did you get pregnant just to stop me from smoking?”

           “That seems more likely than the reality of the situation,” she said with a sigh.

           “You’re really keeping it?”

           She touched her stomach again, leaving her hand there as she looked down at it.  “It’s weird, but I feel kind of attached to the little mutant.”

           The ceremony ended, and Konoha slowly came back to life.

           Naruto was mad that we’d left, while also weirdly elated by his newfound freedom.

           “Sakura’s having a party,” he said, suddenly swooping me into a kind of waltz in the middle of the hotel lobby.  “Let’s go, okay?”

           “When did you learn how to dance?” I asked suspiciously.

           “I have lots of hidden talents.”

           I used my sharingan to follow him.  “No, I have lots of hidden talents.  You need a pat on the back and a sticker for every little thing that you accomplish.”

           “You make me sound really needy,” he complained, dipping me.

           I glared at him.

           He grinned, pulling me back up.  “Yurina’s taking a dance class and I was her practice partner this week.”

           That sounded adorable, and I needed to see it in person so I could take hundreds of photos and hoard them under my pillow.

           “You look like you just thought something horrible,” Naruto said, bringing our waltzing to an end and poking my nose.

           “I did,” I said, shaking my head.  “Why does my mind go to such horrific places?”

           “Did you really think something awful, or were you thinking about how cute Yurina and I must’ve been dancing together?”

           “Are we going to this stupid party or what?”

           “Yeah, where are our kids?”

           “Playing with Suigetsu,” I said, gesturing vaguely.

           Naruto gave me a confused look.

           “Yeah, he’s suddenly decided that he likes children.  Don’t ask, you don’t want to know.”

           Naruto made some clones and sent them off in different directions while we headed towards Sakura’s.

           We walked how we often walked around Suna, fingertips laced and shoulders brushing.

           Konoha wasn’t Suna.

           Of course, no one dared say anything.  Even if Naruto had just finished retiring an hour earlier, he was still their beloved hokage.

           But they didn’t need to say anything.  The obvious disgust, the averted eyes, the constant whispering while eyes darted towards us and quickly away.

           “Why am I here?” I muttered, taking my hand from Naruto’s.

           He snatched my hand back.

           I frowned at him.

           He frowned back.  “Come on,” he said, pulling me along forcefully.

           I glared death at the next idiot who made a face at us.

           He stopped walking and just stared at me like a terrified animal.

           I smiled, and that set him running off.

           “Don’t terrify my citizens,” Naruto said, pulling my hand up and kissing the knuckles.

           “Fuck them,” I replied.

           “Let’s just get to the party, okay?”

           I hated being in Konoha.  It made me feel weak and cornered.  It also brought up unwanted memories of my family.

           “We should go to your parents’ graves,” Naruto said, reading my mind like usual.

           “Yeah,” I said quietly.

           “We can go to mine, too,” he added.  “I think they’d like to see you.”

           “Dead people can’t see things, dumbass.”

           “Don’t be an asshole just because you’re stressed.”

           “Sorry.”

           He squeezed my hand, accepting my apology.

           “Sasuke-senseeeei!” Mikio cried, attaching himself to my leg.

           “What?” I asked, picking him up and sitting him on my shoulders again.  It made it easier to walk.

           “We had so much fun with Suigetsu,” he said happily.

           “With Suigetsu?” Naruto asked, confused.

           “Yeah!” Kanon said, holding her arms up to Naruto.

           He picked her up and put her on his shoulders.

           “Whatta ‘bout me?” Riki complained.

           “I’ve got ya, kid,” Suigetsu said, scooping him up.

           Riki cheered.

           “When did you become the child whisperer?” Naruto asked.

           “I’m great with kids,” Suigetsu said.

           We arrived at the hall, and the kids scampered off to play with the other kids at the party.

           “Is it okay if I drink?” Naruto requested, eyes lingering on the beer being passed around.

           “Yeah, as long as you stay away from Gaara,” I said, casting my eyes towards the kazekage.

           “Aw, come on, we’re not that bad,” he complained.

           “You and Gaara drinking together is the most annoying thing I have ever experienced in my life,” Temari said as she and Shikamaru came in with their son.

           “I feel like you’re exaggerating,” Naruto protested.

           I took a beer from the waiter and handed it to him.  “No shenanigans.”

           “Yeah, yeah, yeah…”

           Of course there were shenanigans.  Fortunately, Sakura put a stop to their plot to fill everyone’s drinks with exploding streamers.

           I sat as far away as possible and smoked my cigarettes, telling anyone who wanted to know that we were getting a divorce in the very near future.

           “Stop telling people that you’re going to divorce me!” Naruto yelled as Shikamaru dragged him over to me.

           “I gave you one task, Naruto.  One fucking task.”

           He went all penitent.  “I’m sorry, baby,” he said, climbing in my lap and throwing his arms around my neck.

           “I’m not taking responsibility for him,” I informed Shikamaru, who was trying to walk away.

           “He’s not my problem anymore,” he said with a shrug.

           “Dammit, Nara!” I growled as he disappeared back into the party.

           Karin snorted.  She and I had just formed a little alliance of non-drinkers in the corner, but apparently she was no longer to be trusted.

           “Go get him some water,” I said to her.

           “Get it yourself.”

           “With this 200 pound tumor?” I said, gesturing towards the man attached to my body.

           “You’re a big strong man, I’m sure you can handle it.”

           “I need a cigarette,” I muttered.

           Karin pointed to her stomach.

           Naruto looked between us, confused.

           “She got knocked up,” I said.

           Naruto detached himself from me to go over to Karin, wrapping her in a hug. “Can I touch it?” he pleaded.

           “It’s still the size of a peanut,” she said, but let him touch her stomach anyway.

           Naruto looked so happy.  “Hey, little cousin,” he said into her stomach.  He and Karin had been able to figure out that Naruto’s mom and Karin’s dad had been first cousins, making them second cousins.  Since neither of them had any actual family, it seemed to please both of them to finally have someone.  “Are you gonna get married?”

           “Heck no,” Karin said.

           “Why not?” Naruto asked.  “Marriage is great!”

           “What’s so great about it?”

           “Tax breaks!”

           Karin snorted.  “Is that why you married Sasuke?”

           “Uh, obviously.”

           I went to get Naruto some water and smoke a cigarette.

           “Sasuke.”

           I stared at the fifth hokage, eyebrow raised.

           “Come have a drink with us,” she said, gesturing towards where Kakashi, Shizune, and a masked ANBU were sitting.

           “You realize I’m a recovering alcoholic?”

           “Who isn’t?” she said, sitting back down and pouring herself more sake.

           I considered walking back to Naruto and Karin, but I wasn’t one to run away from something.

           Kakashi passed me some tea.

           I lit a cigarette, taking a drag before taking a sip.

           Kakashi was looking at me in sad, paternal kind of way.

           I’d once thought of him like a father, but that had been several lifetimes ago, and now we barely spoke.

           “I don’t want anything to happen to you while you’re in the village,” Tsunade finally said.

           I stared at her.

           “Kakashi told you that you still have enemies here.”

           I shrugged.  “I have enemies everywhere.”

           “They’re not happy that you’ve been allowed back,” she said.

           “And just who is this mysterious ‘they’?” I asked, tired of the games.

           “Several members of the elected council,” she said.  “Mostly people from old clans, bearing a grudge against the Uchiha.”

           “Did you have a detailed listing for me?” I asked.  This whole conversation was boring.

           “These are credible threats on your life, Sasuke,” Kakashi said.  “We’re afraid they’ll go after your family to get to you.”

           “I will slit the throat of anyone who tries.”

           Kakashi shook his head.  “You’re too cocky, sometimes.  You and Naruto haven’t had any peers for a long time, but now there’s Getsuko.  Who knows what other powers are going to start emerging? You’re not untouchable, and you need to realize the risk that puts everyone around you at.”

           “Thanks for your concern,” I said, finishing off my tea.  “If you don’t have anything useful to actually say…?”

           “There’s a faction forming against Naruto,” Tsunade said, eyes boring in me.

           “The Ninja Freedom Alliance,” I said.

           “They’ve been making overtures to the old families here in Konoha.”

           That I hadn’t known.  “Are we supposed to be afraid of them?” I asked, trying to play it off.

           “Yes,” the both of them said, faces serious.

           “We will always fight for the two of you,” Kakashi said.

           “Like how you fought so hard to take those damn seals off of my eyes?  Like you fought so hard to let me back into the village?” I asked, bitterness creeping into my voice.

           “Yes,” he said, his voice breaking.

           “Just like how he fought for those things every damn chance he had, just like how he stood up against everyone who spoke out against you,” Tsunade put in. “You don’t know a damn thing about how this village operates.  You have no clue how hard this man has fought for you and protected you.  The only reason you are alive today is because of him.”

           I looked away, watching my cigarette burn its way towards my finger.

           “Good evening, young Uchiha!” Gai said cheerfully as he rolled up to our table. He continued smiling, oblivious to the tension.

           “We’re done, right?” I said, standing up.

           Kakashi was giving me that look again.  “Be careful,” was all he said.

           I went back to Naruto and Karin, plunking a water between Naruto’s hands.

           “But I don’t wanna mess up my buzz,” he complained, putting the water down and pulling me onto his lap.

           I stared at him.

           “I miss drunk Sasuke.”

           I stared at him harder.

           “I do.”

           “You’re the one who made me go to rehab!” I snapped.

           “Well, yeah, ’cause you could never just stop, you know,” he said, rubbing one of his hands up and down my side. “But when you’d only had a coupla drinks, when the night was still young…  You were so damn cute. All open and vulnerable and honest.”

           “Good thing you put a stop to that shit.”

           “I regret it.”

           Karin was giving him an incredulous look.

           “Come on, you loved drunk Sasuke, too.”

           “Drink your water,” she said, pushing the glass towards him.

           Naruto sighed and took a drink.

           “Oh, hey, Ino!” Karin said, standing up as the other woman walked by.

           Ino turned and waited for Karin to join her, then the two walked off together.

           “We’re really unpopular,” Naruto said glumly.

           “Then maybe you shouldn’t try putting things that explode in people’s drinks.”

           “It seemed like a good idea at the time!  It woulda been hilarious!  Even Gaara thought so!”

           “So help me god if I see you two drinking together even once for the rest of this trip.”

           “I’m sorry,” Naruto murmured into my ear.  He let his hands slide down my back and settle in for a grope.  “Hey, so Sakura and Ino said that all the kids could stay at Hokage Tower for a little sleepover.”

           “Do they realize how many children we have?”

           “They even invited Shika’s kid, and Chouji’s, and Kiba’n’Hina’s.”

           “That doesn’t seem chaotic or insane at all.”

           “Mm,” Naruto said, giving me a spank.

           “What the hell?!” I said, pulling away and sitting on my own chair.

           “You are wearing something very naughty right now,” he said, his eyes squinted in a grin.

           I flushed.

           His grin widened.  “It’s getting late.  We should get back to the hotel,” he said, reaching out and rubbing my thigh.

           “You are so damn handsy when you’re drunk,” I muttered.

           “Yeah,” he agreed happily, pulling me to my feet.  “Let’s go.”

           So we went.

[avenger-hawk]

Hey! May be this out of context but I love your insights, observations and way of thinking. May you answer this question, this something is always puzzle me: Why do you think there's *so big*, yet, so *delusional* fandoms?? I've seen many posts that don't even make sense or based on *valid* reasons for this fandom fave character/ship but take a lot of notes (1K, 2K or even 5K)??

Ah, thank you very much, I’m really glad that you appreciate my way of thinking!

(properly tagged anti-ending under the cut)

Especially because there aren’t many who agree with me I guess…not that I care, but your ask reminded me that when I recently fixed my theme and tags I saw one of my old rants that got more than 150 notes, way beyond the notes I get for those, not to mention that particular one was my unprompted take on the Itachi and Sasuke parting scene, specifically on Sasuke’s startled look when Itachi’s hand is reaching him. It wasn’t a popular opinion, no matter what fandom you associate it with, from Itasasu to others. Maybe it was because of the screencaps I added. Maybe because I posted it shortly after the ending and everyone was very much into supporting or hating it, me included, now I don’t want to think about it instead.

About your argument, I agree with you 100%. I (try to) keep it to myself but to me most things I stumble upon sound biased and delusional, which I wouldn’t care about, if the authors didn’t try to sell them as logical, valid and unbiased. As “the ultimate truth”, so to speak, not just on pro-ending and canon blogs (my only contact with them is what seeps through my blacklist) but also from those who are on “my side”, liking the same characters and/or pairings. It’s inevitable tho, as everyone think they’re right. Besides, to them, I am the delusional weirdo~

Yeah because I’m on the unpopular side: I hate the ending, yet I try and focus on what I like instead of talking about it 24/7, I don’t care about the kids, I like weird, rare and dark ships, like the Japanese fandom I see fixed roles (top/bottom) in pairings no matter what is realistic and what’s not because the “reverse order” or “they switch” to me sounds weird or almost as a different pairing, I have a clear idea on characterization and dynamics for my favourite characters and pairings that is not common, I write darkfics with abuse, dubcon, manipulation and all that unhealthy stuff. Oh and Itasasu. To me my ideas are sound, logic and better than most, it’s others’ that are boring, uncreative (and OOC) tho~ 

So as much as some of the things I see make me cringe, as long as no one comes to tell me how wrong I am, I tell myself that mine is just one of the man perspectives out there. (*coughs* no matter how right it is *coughs*)

Introduction over, now the real reply starts. Keep in mind that I am aware that some might genuinely like the things, characters and pairings I’m criticizing here, and keep in mind that I have nothing against those people or against those whose reasons I analyze. It’s just a dispassioned opinion I formed observing the fandom, so don’t take it personally.

The reasons behind certain opinion’s popularity might be that they’re simple and they appeal to what’s already been said and done countless times, so it’s nothing but a repetition of something popular as well, and people like it because it’s safe and doesn’t challenge their views.(also on fanfics and fanon. This explains the super popular Uchiha inc AU with CEO Itachi in his designer clothes, the exaggerated fanon dynamics for Itachi and Sasuke, both with sort of narcissistic arrogant Itachi+whiny Sasuke, and with psycho possessive Sasuke+weakling martyr Itachi, and many more popular fanon elements like selfish victim Naruto to name just one~)

Speaking of which, fiction is never entirely original. It is related to tropes and plot devices and aimed at a certain target. Naruto’s is mostly Shounen Jump readers, so Japanese preteen boys, but also preteen girls…uhm…whose ideas about changing the system are as deep as their knowledge of love. kishi/SJ took their taste into consideration, through reader polls, actually butchering shaping the story to fit their agenda. It’s not just an age thing though. Average and casual readers are the same. They take things at face value and don’t have any interest on motives and consistency of plot and characters. They go with the flow of the story, simple as that. (Like when they see Orochimaru free, Kabuto running an orphanage but Sasuke in jail/having to redeem himself while Naruto is basking in popularity they find it ok and justify it with the reasons given in the anime/manga, and don’t even get me started on pairings. I had arguments in real life, with people I held in relatively high esteem, who since canon pairings happened they said they’re ok even though Sasuke rejected S*kura a few chapters before. Or, in a more fandom-related realm, when they stick to the most popular pairings and opinions around, like sticking to the big 3 because they’re more plausible more than for a real liking~)

It might also be the completely opposite reason: after something has been repeated over and over, after a stalling situation for lack of new material or a boring plotline, after a series ended, there is finally new content, or some new character is introduced, and it’s a breath of fresh air, especially in a dying/decreasing fandom. (Like being enthusiastic about the new generation anime and everything new even though it’s a dull rehash. Or going head over heels for a new opinion/fanon trend because it feels new and fresh, no matter if it’s worse than the previous one. Liiike everyone shitting on the top/bottom distinction or aggressively turning to the reverse version of the pairing because the previous one was apparently “wrong” all along. And I think I’m pretty obvious about what dynamics I’m referring to~)

Sometimes it’s a matter of exposure. The more people are exposed to a certain thing the more they’ll like it. Even if they used to hate it. (if you think about it, there was more anti-ending before, and while many left the fandom, others changed their minds because the new content is everywhere by now)

Sometimes it’s a matter of trends. Random official initiatives or memes or other fan based things become suddenly popular and the average person just follows. This also happens with opinions and fanon that pops out of nowhere, and magically everyone is enlightened by the new truth, not realizing that 99% of the cases it’s the opinion of a random person who runs a random blog and it’s just as biased or plain wonky as anyone else’s so it’s better to take it with a grain of salt.

Despite I’m constantly thinking and theorizing stuff and I pride myself to be an independent thinker, even I fell into this at first. When I started this blog I was still into a compulsive fanfic reading phase and I didn’t write at all. Only when I became unsatisfied with fanfics and meta around I started writing mine, and I realized that some opinions and headcanons I used to hold as valid were influenced by certain fic writers, especially a popular one whose ideas felt fresher compared to others’. Still I should have realized that when I read their stories in my head I changed what felt OOC in characters/dynamics, a clear sign of having a different idea. As I wrote my stuff though my vision became clearer and completely different from that author’s. 

I hope this helps! Either to understand what’s on some people’s minds, or to realize that you’re not the only one who facepalms while scrolling through the tags~

Hawk out