#I’m sitting here with an uti and a cough

[joker-daughter]

to my fellow Europeans…wear a damn jacket in this weather, Idc if you think it’s warm enough outside, the weather will change throughout the day, it will get windy, it will start to rain and you and your immune system will get fucked so please, just do it. even if it’s something light as a flannel or vest, wear it or bring it with you ffs

[mirkwoodshewolf]

You’re my best friend; John Deacon x reader

*Author’s note*

Okay wow I can’t believe I almost missed this deadline but I had this story already up on my Wattpad for the past 2 months so I wanted to transfer it once this deadline came. This is for @writing-of-a-british-bitch​‘s 1k challenge and I asked to do the “Your my best friend” song choice. 

Now some things had transpired between joining this contest and the time I decided to write it and I really needed to get this pain out. As some of you may know from a post over 2 months ago, I lost my baby black kitty Sassy to Kidney failure. And I realize this was meant to be a fluff fic but I couldn’t help but really write this fic in memory of my baby girl. So some fluff and angst but sadly mostly angst is in this fic. So I apologize if I kinda went back on my word Phoebe but I hope this is still okay for your contest.

Taglist:

@plethora-of-things​

@waddles03​

@psychosupernatural​

@ixchel-9275​

@queendeakyy​

@simonedk​

@jd-johndeacon-or-jackdaniels​

@kairosfreddie​

@dancingcoolcat​

@geek-and-proud​

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Kidney Failure. Those are two words that no pet owner wants to hear. My beautiful baby girl Sassy had officially been diagnosed with Kidney failure as well as Kidney stones. At first with her not eating I thought she was just being a little stubborn, then after doing some scary research on why senior cats won't eat, it showed signs of her dying. Then after seeing her cough up some blood early one morning before I wanted to go see a movie, I was told by my parents to take her straight to the vet.

And since I was dealing with this all alone, I was forced to be told by myself and suffer for a full day of the news of my precious black kitty. I had gotten her 15 years ago shortly after my first cat Missy died. She was rescued by an independent rescue woman who had a house full of cats, out of thousands of cats she had, a small, tiny and very skittish kitten stood out of all the rest. Even though at the time my mom wanted a white cat with blue eyes and pink ears, we fell in love with this cute little girl, and I named her Sassy after the cat from Homeward Bound.

For years she was always the skittish girl. Anytime a doorbell would ring, she'd rush out and hide all day. But she was the sweetest cat anyone could ask for. I would always bring her up into my room whenever things got too stressful in my life, or I just wanted to be with her. I'd put her on my bed and just let her sleep there for all hours of the day.

As time went on, she even came to my own rescue like when I got my wisdom teeth removed and I had to recover up in my room. The first night, Sassy had actually came up into my room willingly, hopped right on my bed and slept right beside me for about 3 hours. She's my baby and now she's suffering the same fate my male cat did just several years ago.

My girl's always been the one with health problems throughout her life. First it was the UTI's, then bladder stones, and now she has to take some pills for her thyroid for the rest of her life (she's been on the thyroid pills for roughly about 3 years now), but this—this just blows everything out the window cause now it's evident that she's possibly coming close to the end of her days.

The vet told me what all needed to happen, a couple days of IV to get her fully hydrated, some anti-biotics, and just keeping her as comfortable as possible. So she went through the two days of IV, she's currently on the antibiotic and just has 3 more days to take it while still taking her thyroid pills (I now had to resort to giving it to her liquidly through a syringe since she no longer does the pill pockets anymore).

I don't wanna lose my baby girl. She's my life, my baby, my best friend and I—I don't know what I'm gonna do when the time comes for her when she finally.....

"(Y/n)?" I looked up and there was my dad.

"Hey dad."

"Sweetie, how are you doing? Really?" he said as he came into my room and sat down by my bed.

"I—I'm scared dad. I don't wanna lose my girl. On top with all the stress of trying to find a job, I just can't even focus on anything else but my baby girl."

"I know, I know sweetie." He brought me closer for a hug and I allowed the tears to softly fall down my face. "Maybe—you should get out of the house. Go see those friends of yours, isn't that offer for you to join them at the farm still available?"

"But dad I don't wanna leave Sassy behind. What if she dies while I'm away? That's already what happened to both Hudson and Missy because of school. And I promised that if it ever came Sassy's time I wouldn't allow anything to keep me away from her."

"But if you just solely keep focused on her, you're only gonna make yourself sick. What you need now is time to yourself, spend it with your friends, maybe they can help you out. Maybe even John can help you see. Cause at this rate I feel like you'll only listen to that boyfriend of yours." I softly chuckled as he did to.

"I think I'll just surprise them. They always drop by unannounced at my place either way." He chuckled and said.

"Whatever you want to do. I will watch Sassy for you and make sure she's comfortable. And I promise you if anything does happen, I'll give you a call."

"Thanks dad. I'm glad you came back early."

"Of course. Sassy's important to all of us." I nodded. "You get some sleep now okay sweetie, you've got a long drive ahead of you." I nodded again as my dad kissed the top of my head and gave me a big bear hug.

Once he left my room after shutting my door, I lay there on my bed and allowed the tears to continue to fall as I silently cried myself to sleep.

A few hours later I was on the open road heading towards Rockfield farm where my friends and boyfriend John Deacon. Oh yeah I forgot to mention, John Deacon of Queen is my long time boyfriend. We got together roughly at around Year 10 of secondary school, and even though we ended up going to different colleges, we still kept close to each other with visits and holiday stuff.

In fact, I was the one who convinced him to try out for Queen since I had Freddie Mercury in an art class of mine. And he just decided to take me in as his best friend since we both loved cats (the first time I showed him a picture of my two furbabies he was hooked and wanted to know everything about them).

So I introduced John to the band when Fred told me they needed a new bassist, he auditioned and—the rest was history. As mentioned earlier they were currently at Rockfield farm studios recording their next album 'A Night at the Opera'. Deacy had offered the chance for me to tag along as moral support/citizen critic but when I told him that I was worried about Sassy, he understood but kept the offer open in case I changed my mind.

After what felt like an eternity of driving I finally arrived at the farm just a little bit after 10:30am. I parked the car right next to a blue beetle and got out of my car after shutting off the engine. I looked around the place and saw that it was definitely far out of civilization and distractions, maybe this could be what I needed.

"(Y/n)?" I heard a voice say. I turned around and wearing a pink woman's top and white pants holding a cigarette between his fingers was none other than Freddie Mercury.

"Hey Fred."

"Oh darling it's been so long come here!" I walked over to him as he tossed the cigarette aside into the gravel and extended his arms out. I was then given the biggest bear hug that Freddie is known to give. "Why didn't you tell us we were coming?"

"Figured I surprise you all. You're not pissed are you?"

"Absolutely not dear, a visit from you is like seeing an angel grace our presence. And maybe this time Deacy can pick up the slack." I softly giggled as we separated from each other. "So how are things at home? Deacy said poor Sassy was feeling under the weather, how is the little dear?" at that point I grew sad again. "(Y/n)? Dear was it something I said?"

"Freddie I—the reason I came here was because of Sassy. She's—not doing so good." At that point his face grew worried.

"Come darling, let's sit on the porch swing and talk. You look like you're about to burst into tears." He wrapped an arm around me as we walked towards the front porch of the house and sat down on the cushioned porch swing. Freddie sat to my left and said, "Now then darling, tell me everything." I took a deep breath and proceeded to tell him.

"Last Sunday Mary and I were planning on going to see a movie, but as I was getting around I had seen Sassy laying near where she had just spit up, but what scared me was that there was blood mixed with the phlegm that she had puked up. So I called Mary and told her I had to take her to the vet, they ran some tests on her and......" I sniffled and felt the tears starting to come back. "Freddie she's suffering from kidney failure." He gasped in horror as he covered his mouth with his hand.

"Oh my god......(y/n) I—I'm so sorry dear. Oh come here you." He brought me close into his chest and tears once again began to fall down my face. "Oh my poor dear, I can't imagine what you must be feeling. If it were one of my darlings, I'd be feeling just as heartbroken as you. How—how long has she got?"

"Well thankfully the doctor said if we just keep an eye on her. Cause she's still drinking water, going to the bathroom, and eating when she wants to she could live a little while longer. But Freddie—she's 6lbs now and every time you hold her—you can just feel her bones. It's like picking up a stuffed animal at this point."

"Oh the poor little darling. Does she still walk?"

"Yeah she can still walk, but she—she drags her back legs or stumbles around before just giving up. We're trying to keep her on the main level of our house trying to limit the amount of times of her going either up or down the stairs. Sometimes she'll eat twice a day, sometimes it'll take her well over 24 hours before she eats again."

"Okay. So what all have you done for her?"

"Well she had to do 2 days of IV to get her rehydrated. Now she's on an antibiotic for the next ten days, she'll be done with it in three days so my dad's gonna finish it all off. He said I needed a break from all the stress cause along with her being sick and me struggling to find a job, I've barely been able to keep myself together."

"Your dad's a smart man. Cause dear no offense but you really look like shit."

"Gee thanks Freddie." I sassed back sarcastically.

"Now, now I don't mean any offense by it. I'm just—"

"I know what you mean Fred. Its just—I don't wanna lose my baby girl. I know she's getting older hell she's 16 years old. But I—I don't wanna lose my baby just yet. Not when my life is fully about to begin."

"I know darling, I know." He comforted me as he rubbed my back. I felt him kiss the crown of my head. "Listen to me, okay? You gave that beautiful black cat the best 16 years of her life. And who knows maybe she'll tough it out and stick with you for another 3 years. She knows you love her, and knows that you are doing everything to take care of her."

"You truly are the cat guru Freddie."

"Well comes with experience. But I've seen for myself the love you've given that precious thing. And, god forbid, when the day does come for her to move on, she'll have you to thank for being the best mummy cat she's ever had. And loved her even with her being the skittish thing that she was. Cause other than you, I would've been the only one to see the potential in her."

"Yeah she was a precious thing when I saw her and briefly got to play with her when she was just a kitten." Freddie wiped my tears away with the sleeve of his shirt and he asked me.

"Feeling any better?"

"A little. Thanks Freddie. It takes a cat parent to understand just what I'm going through."

"I'm always here for you dear. And hey, just so you know, my furbabies are your furbabies. They love you just as much as your own do, so anytime you need to come over, they'll be happy to see you."

"I'll keep that in mind."

"Shall I get Deacy?"

"Actually I would like to come in, I've been driving since 1am this morning and I could really use a bed right now."

"Or is it just so you and Deacy can—"

"Get your mind out of the gutter you rotter!" he chuckled and said.

"Of course dear, come in come in I'll grab your bags." I went to protest but he stopped me, "No darling I will not take no for an answer." He grabbed my suitcases and we entered inside the house.

It was a charming little house of sorts with old knick-knacks, pictures whether painted or old photographs, and completely wooded interior. Kinda reminded me of my grandparent's place a little bit, a true country home.

"My darlings, we've got a surprise visitor with us to—" Freddie announced as we came into the kitchen. "Oh fuck seriously Roger? I thought I heard a crash but never did I think you'd go that far."

"What else do you expect Fred? Brian said my song wasn't strong enough so I figured I'd show him if this was strong enough!!"

"Perhaps I shouldn't have come after all." I made myself known. At that point Deacy popped right out of his seat and rushed right over towards me and embraced me. I hugged him back and buried my face into his neck. God every time I got a hug from the love of my life, I was already happy and at home with him.

"Why didn't you call and tell me you were coming?"

"And miss the surprise look on your face? I don't think so." He chuckled before separating from me to cup the side of my face. I felt his calloused thumb stroke my cheek gingerly and he placed a soft kiss to my brow.

"Ugh it's too early for you guys to act all lovie-dovie!" Roger complained.

"Oh put a sock in it Rog!" I sassed at him.

"It really is good to see you here (y/n). so what brought on this surprise visit?" asked Brian. My smile dropped and I solemnly looked down.

"My love?" Deacy asked concerned.

"Deacy dear why don't you take (y/n) downstairs to your room and get her situated. She could really use some sleep right now, then come back up and I'll explain everything." Freddie set my stuff down and went up to Brian and Roger and wrapped his arms around their shoulders to guide them out of the kitchen.

"What's he talking about love?"

"It's—the reason why I'm here isn't a happy reason. I wish it was but I—"

"Okay, okay, okay relax. Calm down my love. Come on let's go downstairs, though I must warn you the room isn't very big."

"I'll take whatever it is Johnny." He grabbed my suitcases as wrapped an arm around me as he guided me towards the basement stairs.

And boy was he ever right. How could my beloved possible sleep in a room this cramped, not to mention cold? He set my stuff right by his before guiding me to the bed. He sat down close to me and said.

"Do you want to tell me? Or should I go up to see Freddie?"

"I—I can tell you."

"You sure?" I nodded. "Alright, if you say so. But before you speak, take a couple of deep breaths with me, okay?" he slowly breathed in and I followed behind him. We held our breath for three seconds before slowly exhaling out for five. We did this together over and over and over again till finally I was ready to tell him, and I told him everything in regard to Sassy.

As I explained everything, every now and then I would stop because I could feel tears springing in my eyes. Jesus just when I thought I had cried my last tear, they still keep coming. But my sweet, loving John had tissues at the ready and he would hand me one to wipe my face, before sitting himself even closer to me resting his head on top of mine while his arms were wrapped around me rubbing either my back or arms comfortingly.

"Oh my love. You should've called me as soon as you were told the news. You know I would've dropped everything just to be with you, to comfort you through this." He said once I had finished telling him everything.

"I didn't want to disturb you John. This album is really important to Queen and I—didn't want to distract you."

"Fuck the album, you're my first priority."

"John."

"I mean it (y/n). if you ever asked me to leave the band I will."

"You know I would never ask that of you."

"I know, I'm just saying I would. I just—I just hate the fact that I had to let you get the news alone. I knew your dad left to spend time with your mum for their anniversary together which left you to take care of Sassy and Phoebe, and to get such news all on your own." He kissed my cheek and softly stroked my cheek.

"Why are you so good to me?"

"Your my best friend, (y/n). I'll always be good to you." He leaned in and captured my lips in a soft kiss. I cupped the side of his face before separating from him and pressing my forehead to his while I felt his nose graze against mine.

I then wrapped my arms around his neck while I felt his arms wrap around my waist. He pulled me close to him so that I practically sitting on his lap. I felt his hand rub comforting circles on my back before slowly leaning back. The slightly rickety bed creaked and it was definitely a tight squeeze, but we somehow made it work with me practically lying on top of him, our legs tangled up with each other's and my head resting against his chest.

"God how did you manage to sleep on this tiny bed?" I asked.

"Trust me it's not easy. But somehow I've managed."

"The boys didn't boot you down here did they?"

"No, Paul actually gave me this room. Said that small ones don't get nearly as cold."

"Aww Deacy I'm so sorry." I cupped his jawline to which he nuzzled against my hand and gave my palm a kiss.

"Not your fault. But how are you, really (y/n)."

"Truthfully my head is literally killing me."

"Probably from dehydration from all the crying you must've been doing." He said as I felt him stroke down my hair. He kissed my forehead and set me down on the bed. "I'll get you some water and snacks for you. Gotta get you rehydrated and eating again." He pecked my nose and I smiled at him.

"Thank you Johnny."

"Anytime my love. Stay here, I'll be right back." He brushed the hair out of my face before giving me a soft peck before heading upstairs. I sighed and rested my head onto the pillows and inhaled John's scent from his shampoo that I had bought for him. It gave me a sense of comfort even while he was gone for a brief moment.

He came back down with a bottle of water and a couple bags of crisps.

"You really went all out didn't you?" I teased.

"Well if I know you, I know that when you get really sad, you tend to skip meals. And I know this isn't really the best thing for you to eat right now, but it's all we've got since Roger knocked down the leftovers bitching about his car song."

"His car song?"

"It's better if you don't ask." He sat down on the floor beside me and laid out the bags of crisps then unscrewed the bottle cap of water before placing the straw in. He held it out to me and I took a sip of it. After taking a long drink, he set it down on the nightstand right beside the bed and opened up one of the bags of crisps and proceeded to feed me.

"I can feed myself you know."

"I know, but you've been under a lot of pressure lately. With the unsuccessful job hunts as well as Sassy being sick, the least I can do is pamper you my darling. Now c'mon open up." He guided a potato crisp towards my mouth and I opened my mouth as he popped it inside my mouth.

Deacy kept on feeding me as well as giving me sips of water. Finally after feeling full from the crisps, he set them aside and crawled back into the bed with me.

"Wait, don't you have some recording to do?"

"I talked to the guys about it, I'm gonna stay here and take care of my baby today."

"No Deacy I—I'll just delay your schedule......"

"It's already said and done love, besides Freddie insisted that I stay with you. I can make up my bits tomorrow." I looked up at him and said.

"Thank you Deacy, it—this means a lot. Really, with Sassy being—"

"Shhhh, shhh. Just sleep my love. You really need it." He whispered as he gingerly stroked my cheek with the back of his fingers. I closed my eyes and cuddled close to him, his hand tucked underneath my shirt and I felt his nails gently stroke up and down my back comfortingly. The mixture of his scent, his breathing and his heartbeat was like a lullaby that soothed me to sleep.

A week later, I was starting to feel a bit better than I had back at home. Deacy and the boys provided the perfect distraction, Freddie gave me a mini piano lesson as he was practicing his latest masterpiece that he deemed was going to change music forever, Brian and I would take pictures of the guys whether for his scrapbooking or just out of plain goofiness, and Roger—well Roger spent three days in a cupboard but at least he was still willing to talk to me even through the cupboard.

And of course Deacy was an angel with the warm cuddles and bass playing. I've always found comfort in seeing him play the bass, he was in his element and it was amazing to see him break out of the shy exterior and just be him. I was laying on the couch in the studio and he was fiddling around with his bass.

"Can you play me something?" I asked. He looked up and he asked.

"What would you like me to play? Liar? White Queen?"

"Do you think you can give me a sneak peek at a song from this album?"

"Well legally I'm not allowed to but....off the record if there were no Prenter nor sound engineer to be around." He stated as he got up and went over to the sound station and flipped a couple of switches.

"You clever, devious man." I giggled.

"That's why you love me. C'mere." I got up from the couch and went up to the chair he was now sitting at. He extended his hand as I got closer to him and I took his hand. He then had me sit down on his lap and I felt his arm wrap around my waist. "This was finished the night before you came to the farm. I.....I had you in mind when I was writing it."

"Oh god Deacy please tell me it's nothing like Misfire was."

"No not this time. I promise, and in a way....you can think of this song as yours and Sassy's song." He turned on the switch and soon playing through the speakers was an electric sounding instrument. "That's me on the electric piano."

"Really?"

"Yeah, Fred wanted absolutely no part of it so I sat down all night learning how to play it so that I could have it ready for recording." I awed at him and he gave me a peck to my temple and I soon heard the magnificent vocalizations of all four of my boys singing at once, their voices backtracked by their own voices making it sound like there was an entire choir backing them up.  Freddie's god-like voice singing the gentle melody of the words.

"What's it called?"

"You're my best friend." He lay my head on his shoulder and the two of us listened to the song together. I'll admit the lyrics did fit Sassy to a T. She has been there for me before in the past and she was always the one I turned to when things got rough and no one else was there for me.

When the song finally ended, I turned to John and hugged him, my arms wrapped around his neck.

"That is literally the sweetest thing anyone's ever done for me. Thank you John."

"I'm glad you liked it love."

"Like? Deacy 'like' doesn't even begin to describe what this song meant to me. You and Sassy are both my best friends."

"And I'm happy to share you, even if it is with a feline." I giggled and playfully nudged his shoulder which made him chuckle. "God I've really missed seeing you smile."

"What are you talking about? I've been smiling the whole time I was here."

"Oh you mean the ones that don't reach up to your eyes, the smiles that don't make your eyes twinkle and a laugh come out of that beautiful mouth of yours. Yeah those were real smiles." He sassed sarcastically.

"Okay smartass. Maybe I've—still been depressed about not being with my girl."

"And there's nothing wrong with missing her. But you also need to learn to take care of yourself as well. You looked absolutely exhausted when you first arrived, it was like you'd hardly slept a wink." I looked down shamefully. "I just want you to realize that in order for you to be there for Sassy, you also need to learn to take care of yourself. Do you understand what I'm trying to say my love?"

"Yes Deacy, I understand. I'm sorry."

"Hey, you've got no reason to be sorry. You caring about Sassy this much proves that you're a good cat mum. And maybe in the future, you'll be the same way with our own child." I smiled through a choked sob. I buried my face into John's neck as I felt his hand go underneath my shirt and once again stroking my bare skin sending comforting shivers up my back.

"I love you so much John Deacon."

"I love you so much too (y/n) (l/n)." I looked up at him and he smiled down at me softly and kissed the center of my forehead, the tip of my nose, both cheeks then finally a soft and loving kiss to my lips. "Besides, I always knew one surefire way to get that beautiful smile on your face." Oh shit.

I immediately got off his lap and went back to the couch and held the pillow out in front of me.

"Why ever did you flee from me my love?" he asked in a mocked hurt tone.

"Not another step Deacon. I know what your method is and you're not doing it."

"Whatever do you mean?" oh that little rotter he was taunting me.

"Don't make me say it Deacy!" I begged as I buried my body into the covers leaving only my head to the outside world.

"Well you're gonna have to cause all I'm doing is walking towards you and all you're doing is trying to hide yourself under the blankets and pillows." He continued to taunt as he now hovered over me, his body pinning mine to the couch.

"Deacy no!" I whined.

"No what?"

"Deacy!"

"You're gonna have to specify what I can't do my darling." He cupped the side of my face after tucking some hair behind my ear and captured my lips in a seductive kiss. He almost had me under his spell, that was until I felt him squeeze my sides through the blanket. I squealed and tried to buck him off me but he stayed on top of me. "My, my, my, what have we here?"

"John I swear to god I'll kill you if you do it."

"Do what? All I did was just graze your sides and you just reacted to it. Now what do they call that thing again when people get so sensitive to a light touch?" he pondered.

My god this little shit was good. He was trying to force me to say it.

"John please!" I begged to him with the best puppy dog eyes I could muster.

"Aww look at you pleading and begging with those eyes, it's so adorable. But it won't stop me. Now answer my question." I felt him squeeze my sides again and I let out a soft shrieked laugh. "God if I didn't know any better I'd say you didn't want me to......"

"Tickle me!" I blurted out.

"What a wonderful idea! You always were terribly ticklish." I then pushed him off of me and decked out of the recording studio and began racing around the barn.

I went inside the barn and tried to duck through or go around any beams I could find.

"You're not going to escape from me (n/n). You know you were always the slowest runner."

"Shut up Deacon! It's cause you always cheated with those long legs of yours!" I snapped as I ducked through the hay storage bin before getting out on the other side.

Deacy continued to chase after me for what felt like forever. And I don't know when they became involved or why they chose to do it, but somehow Roger and Freddie got involved with the chase and I was soon tackled out in the field by Roger and he was the first to start tickling me before Freddie then finally my boyfriend Deacy joined in the attack.

The three of them tickling me non-stop till I was red in the face and could barely breathe. Fred and Rog would've gone on forever had John not stopped them and forced them to let me breathe. Once I was able to catch my breath, I turned towards the two troublemakers and said.

"Where.....in the hell.....did you two.....come from?"

"From London." Freddie bluntly shrugged.

"I know that smartass. I meant during the chase." I groaned.

"Oh that well when we saw Deacy chasing you, Fred and I just want in on the action. It didn't matter what we had to do, just as long as it got you to smile kid." Roger said as he gave my hair a ruffle, messing it up.

"Roger! Rog you're messing up my hair!" I said as I tried to get his hand off my head but he would keep putting it back on top and messing my hair up even further.

"But you've got to admit darling, we did get you to smile that fabulous smile that can only be compared to Mary's." said Freddie as he wrapped an arm around me. "Plus didn't that help you just a little bit?"

"Yeah I guess so. Thanks guys, for real this week has—literally been a life saver. I think I'm ready to head back home tomorrow."

"What so soon? But darling we were just having so much fun!" whined Freddie as he brought me close to his chest.

"Plus you help lessen the stress that Prenter causes us." Said Rog.

"And the stress we cause each other. You sure you can't stay a bit longer?"

"Sorry Deacy, I gotta get back to my girl." He rubbed my back and said.

"Okay. Just—promise to call me in case anything happens. You know I'll gladly drop things here to be with you." I cupped the side of his face and stared at him lovingly.

"I'll even allow us to take time off the album so that all of us can be there for you darling." Fred said I turned towards him and Roger and saw that Roger nodded agreeing with both Fred and Deacy.

"You guys—how did I ever get lucky to have such good friends like you all?"

"You've honestly been a blessing to us dear. Never doubt that." Soon I was in a group hug with the front man, the drummer and the bassist of Queen.

The next morning I was all packed up and was hugging the guys goodbye and thanking them for helping me out this past week. I had just gotten done hugging Rog and Bri and I was now at Freddie. He smiled at me and embraced me tightly and he said in my ear.

"You be sure to call us with any updates Sassy's got."

"I will I promise." He separated from me and kissed both my cheeks.

"Drive safe (y/n) dear."

"Will do Fred." I then turned towards the love of my life, my best friend. He held his arms out and I immediately went into them and hugged him back.

"I'm so glad that you came to visit love. Drive safely back home, and call me whenever you get there."

"I will, promise me you'll continue to work hard on the album."

"Will do love." He kissed me but it was shortly interrupted by Prenter exclaiming.

"Enough of this already the boys need to get back to work!"

"Alright Prenter that's it come here!" Roger then charged after Prenter which made John and I laugh softly.

"Should we try to stop him?" I asked.

"Nah, let him take his prey. Besides he deserves it, Prenter's an arsehole anyway." He kissed my temple softly before hugging me one last time. I got into my car and waved goodbye to the guys one last time before taking off back down towards the main road.

Three days later after returning from the farm, I was back at home just waking up for the day. I once again saw Sassy lying there on the couch just like she was last night. I sighed and went up to Sassy and pet her and she shot her head up and looked at me.

"Hey baby girl, ready for your medicine?" she just looked at me before laying her head down. I went over to the sink and prepped the water bottle cap (at this point she had stopped taking the pill pockets, and since I could no longer force it down her, I resorted to liquidating the ¼ pill).

After waiting a couple of minutes I sucked the water into a syringe and walked back over to the couch. Gently as I could, I picked her up and she let out a weak meow.

"I know baby, I know. But this is just the water one this time. You got done with the antibiotic awhile ago." I placed the syringe into her mouth and she weakly opened her mouth but was still able to take in the water. Once she took it all in, I kissed her and took her over to the water bowl cause I knew she probably drink any water since last night. "Here we go baby, drink up."

I gently set her down and she merely just lay there for a moment before realizing where she was. Her head shot up and she reached her paw over the water bowl like how she normally drinks and went face first into the water, her usual way of drinking water.

Once she had her fill after lying down a few times before going back up again to drink some more. I picked her up once more and set her back down on the couch. Since it was a sunny day for the first time in a while, I decided to let my girl sunbathe, her favorite thing to do whenever the sun was out.

"Here you go little mama." I cooed as I stroked her head and kissed it. I then went back upstairs and got ready for the day. The phone rang and I picked it up and answered, "Hello?"

'Hey sweetie. Whatcha doin?' it was my dad's voice.

"Oh just—getting around and all that."

'Ahh I see. How's our girl doing?'

"She's....hanging in there." I looked towards her to see her still breathing.

'Okay good, good. So what have you got on the agenda for today?'

"Well Mikaela is coming to pick me up and we're gonna hang out for my graduation/pre b-day plans."

'Ahh I see, what time is she coming over?'

"About 10ish."

'Okay well you girls have fun and I will talk at you later okay?'

"Okay daddy, love you."

'Love you too sweetie, bye.'

"Bye." I hung up the phone and turned back towards my baby. I walked up to her and as I touched her, her paws twitched and she turned and looked up at me. "I love you so much baby girl." I kissed her head and she turned away from me. With a heavy sigh, I walked back upstairs and got around.

A couple minutes later at 10:07am I walked back downstairs to see Phoebe sitting up on the table looking at Sassy's food bowl that was there.

"Phoebe get down!" I snapped at her. She meowed as she hopped down and ran off. That's when I looked down to see the most horrifying sight I would ever see in my life.

Sassy's eyes were glazed over, and I couldn't see her breathing anymore.

"Sassy? Sassy? Sassy!" I touched her fur hoping to see her react but when he jaw went slacked, tears sprung in my eyes and I fell to my knees. I picked her up in my arms and held her close to me as I sobbed. "Sassy! No! No! No! Sassy please no!" I sobbed as I paced around the room hoping that she would wake up but all she did was lay limp against my shoulder. I placed her down on the loveseat to see if she would breathe again but she didn't.

Sassy was gone.

I ran up to the phone and dialed my dad's number and pleaded softly that he would pick up.

'Hello?' he asked.

"Daddy."

'Yeah?' his voice sounded concerned as soon as he heard the heartbreak in my voice.

"I think Sassy's dead!" I sobbed out.

'Oh my god our cat just died.'

"She was fine earlier as I said. She drank some water but when I came back downstairs I noticed that she's no longer breathing, her eyes are glazed over and she's just limp every time I hold her!"

'Okay, okay (y/n) calm down okay sweetie. Calm down. Here's what I want you to do. I want you to get her cat carrier and a towel.'

"Okay."

'Okay? Then put the towel in the cat carrier and then I want you to gently put her in and take her to the vet, okay? They'll work out the cremation process.'

"Okay."

'And sweetie listen to me. At least she died at home, okay? She passed away peacefully, safe and at home instead of a cold, strange metal table. Because I had to go through that with Hudson and it was not a pretty sight. It broke me, but you gave Sassy a happy life and even with you taking care of her on your own for a while she knew you loved her.' I choked out a sob and nodded.

"I know."

'Okay but go take her to the vet, I'll call your mom and she'll get in touch with the vet.' I nodded.

"Okay I'll take her to the vet."

'Okay now your mom will be available all day for you if you need to get in touch with her. I've got a meeting to get to in the next while. But call your mom anytime you need to talk.'

"Okay."

'Okay I love you sweetheart, it's gonna be okay. At least she's not suffering anymore and that she's now at peace.'

"Yeah."

'Alright sweetie, I love you so much.'

"I love you too."

'Bye.'

"Bye." I hung up the phone and proceeded to get her ready to take her to the vet one last time. I grabbed a towel from my bathroom and tucked it in her cat carrier. I looked down at my baby with tears pouring down my face. Once I got her in the cat carrier on her side, I quickly wrote a note for Mikaela and taped it to the door before finally rushing out to my car and race towards the vet.

When I got there, I stood there waiting for what felt like forever in the small vet clinic till finally one of the vet techs came in. She walked over to me, empathy in her eyes and she said.

"Your mum called and told us what happened. We'll get started with the cremation process, are there any questions you have for us?"

"Just.....just make sure that this is for real. I—don't wanna try anything unless I know it's for real."

"Okay." She took my cat carrier and walked into the back room. I sat down by the window trying to calm myself down. The doors opened and there stood my best friend Mikaela.

"Hey I got your message, are you okay?"

"I don't know dude. Thank god you're here though."

"Of course, of course." She sat down beside me and wrapped an arm around me. It was then the vet came in from the back room and he greeted me.

"She has passed away. Along with the kidney stones and failure, she also suffered a stroke." I covered my mouth with my hand and allowed the tears to pour down my face even more. "We can prep the cremation. Would you like the pawprint as well as her ashes or just the pawprint?"

"Just the pawprint." I replied.

"Okay, before we take her away would you like to see her?" I turned to Mikaela before turning back to the vet and said.

"Yes."

"Okay. Come back with me." I followed behind him and Mikaela told me she'd wait outside. I went through the back door and right there on the table I saw my baby girl lying right on her stomach, her front paws extended outwards and her eyes still glassed over, her fangs exposed as her jaw was still slightly lacked.

"Take all the time you need." the vet told me as one of the technicians came and covered up just her lower body. I nodded before leaning down and pet her one last time, trying to imprint her soft fur into my hand, and my memory.

"At least she died at home, where she was most happiest." Said one of the female vet technicians.

"Yeah. She—she was sunbathing on the couch. She always loved it when the sun was out and I would open up the blinds."

"Yeah. I'll bet she really appreciated it."

"It just—with all the health problems she's had throughout her life I just hoped that....."

"I understand. Especially with all that she had been through for the past week." I nodded before turning back to my baby girl. I knelt down and gave her one final kiss before finally saying.

"Okay. Okay I—I think I'm ready." Then another vet tech came up and fully covered up my baby girl forever, the final step in pronouncing her dead.

"We'll get in contact with your mom about the billing. Again we're so sorry for your loss." The same vet tech that I was talking to earlier about my baby girl.

"Thank you." I said thanks the vet techs as well as the vet for all that they've done for Sassy for her last 2 weeks of life. I walked out of the back room and Mikaela came up and hugged me as we left the vet.

When I got back home I called my mom and told her that she could take care of the billing. After that I said.

"I'm sorry about all this dude I know we had plans and all but—"

"No, no, no, no it's fine. Do—you wanna call John and tell him? Or do you want me to talk for you?"

"I think I can tell him. He loved Sassy as much as I did." I picked the phone up once more and dialed the number for the farm that Deacy gave me before they left. It rang about five times before I heard a voice say.

'Hello?' Oh god why did it have to be him?

"Paul. Can I speak to John please?"

'Oh (y/n) I'm afraid he's too busy to talk right now. Since you distracted the guys they're way behind schedule with the album. They have to work twice as long just to meet the upcoming deadline.'

'Oi Prenter why are you answering the phone!? Thought I told you that you weren't allowed to take calls anymore!' Roger's loud voice proclaimed. I then heard the signs of a struggle and Paul's painful cry as Roger's voice spoke up. 'Talk to me.'

"Rog."

'(Y/n), hey what's going on?'

"Is Deacy too busy to talk?"

'Oh absolutely not, hang on a second love okay? OI DEACY!!! YOUR GIRL'S ON THE LINE COME OVER HERE!' Once again there was silence before I heard John's voice at last.

'(Y/n)? What's going on love is everything okay?' my lip quivered as I gasped out a sob. '(Y/n)? Love you're scaring me.'

"She's gone Deacy." I choked out.

'Oh my god. (N/n) I—I'm so sorry. Was she—'

"On the couch in the sun. It was almost an hour ago."

'Jesus Christ. But (y/n) you were there for her like you always said you wanted to be, and she's no longer in any pain, she's at peace. And she's up in heaven with her brother and meeting her older sister. The cat you had before you got her.'

"I know. I'm—I'm sorry I'm distracting you—"

'No, no, no, no, no, no love shhh, shhh, shshshsh. You are by no means a distraction. I'm glad you called me (y/n). I wish I could be there with you right now holding you in my arms.'

"I want that too Deacy."

'Are you going to get the pawprint?'

"Yeah, it should be ready in a day or two."

'That's good. I love you so much my brave mama cat, you know that right?'

"I love you too. I just—wish you were here John."

'I know. I wish I was there too. Is anyone with you right now?'

"Mikaela is, and I—think I'm gonna call Mary."

'That's good. Surround yourself with those two right now since they know what's happening. Do whatever you feel like you need to do right now okay?'

"I will. I do know I wanna get out of the house. I can't...I just can't be in here."

'Okay then do that. Go to Biba, the record store, see a movie, whatever. Hey, it's gonna be okay, alright?'

"Okay. I just—I miss her so much Deacy."

'I know love, I know. I miss her too. Hey listen, I gotta go, the guys are looking at me wanting to know what's going on.'

"I'll let you go then. I maybe out the whole day but I'll give you a call later tonight, okay?"

'Okay my love. I'll talk to you soon. Call me anytime.'

"I will, bye Deacy."

'Bye my love.' I hung up the phone and took a deep breath.

"You sure you wanna get out of the house? It's cool if you just wanna stay here."

"No Mikaela I just—I really can't be in this house anymore. I need to get away from here for a while."

"Okay, okay. But let's get you calm down first before we head on out, okay? I'll talk to Mary this time and you just sit down and drink some water." I nodded and walked over to the kitchen and grabbed a water bottle before sitting down at the kitchen table while Mikaela made the call to Mary and explained everything.

A little while later Mikaela told me that Mary is willing to meet us at the movies since we were planning on seeing that new shark movie that was out now. After recomposing myself and drying my eyes up to show no signs that I had been crying, Mikaela and I stepped out and drove on to meet Mary at the movie theater.

The whole day was spent having a girl's day out. Mary paid for our movie tickets (we chose a later showing than originally planned due to all of this), and then Mikaela paid for our lunch. When it got close to our movie time, we all drove back to the theater (thank god it was literally just across the street) and we got our seats.

For the next 2 hours the film JAWS both terrified and had me at the edge of my seat. By the end of the film when Chief Brody shot the shark, the entire audience actually applauded. After the film, we spent the rest of the afternoon doing a little shopping to help cheer me up until it got dark and I knew I had to get back in order to feed Phoebe.

Mikaela and Mary both came back to the house with me to bid me a final goodbye and to give their final condolences on my loss today. They told me that if I ever needed to talk about today or vent, cry or hang out I could always call them. I thanked them before finally entering back inside the house.

When I got inside, the first things I had noticed was that my hall lights were on and Phoebe was currently eating at her food bowl. At that point my heart started racing a bit because my dad was still at work by now since he had requested some overtime so I know that he'd usually would be on his way home but not here, here. I then heard footsteps coming down the stairs and that's when I was shocked to see Deacy coming down the stairs.

"I thought that might've been you. Had it been your dad it would've been awkward."

"Wha—but.....how are you....."

"Before you ask any questions, how are you feeling? Truthfully?" I looked down and sniffled.

"Heartbroken. I miss her Deacy! I miss my baby so much!"

"I know, I know sweetheart. I do too." He said as he immediately embraced me and rocked me back and forth. "Sassy will forever live in your heart and in your memories, you gave her a good life till the end. And she at least passed away in a peaceful, safe environment. She knew you were there and that you took care of her right to the end."

"It all just happened so fast I mean—she was diagnosed with kidney failure just short of 2 weeks and now she—"

"Shhhh, shh I know. I know. But there was nothing you could do love, there was nothing anyone could've done. She—she was an old cat and.....it was just meant to be her time now. You wouldn't want her to keep suffering would you?"

"Never."

"Exactly, no one does. I know it's selfish but she at least died here at home. And she'll be right there with you."

"I just wish she could've stuck around longer, till I at least found a job. It's stressing enough getting no responses cause of my lack of job experiences now I just....."

"I know love. I know. But you know you've got me right? I can be your stress reliever now, hmm? What do you say?" his nose gently grazed against mine. I sniffled and looked up at him to see him softly smile down at me, his eyes softly shining with empathy.

"Thank you Deacy. I'm happy you came back for me."

"I'll always come to you whenever you need me. You're my best friend (y/n)."

"And you're mine John Deacon." For the rest of the night Deacy pampered me with a warm bath filled with my favorite bath bombs and favorite scented candles. When the bath was done, he helped me into my favorite snuggly pj's before placing me on my bed and snuggling up close to me. My head resting over his chest and his arms wrapped around me snug and tight.

His hand rubbed my back comfortingly and every now and then I felt him kiss the crown of my forehead every time I sniffled or whimpered. Even though he always said he wasn't a singer, I heard him hum the tune to our song 'you're my best friend' and all the while I kept thinking of my baby girl.

[murderdaddymayhem]

One Of The Clan - Otis Driftwood x Male Reader

 Synopsis: Otis comes out to the Firefly Family and tells them you're his boyfriend.

(Because who cares that they're a gross murder family, they're also really sweet with each other and super supportive so this is totally a thing, thanks)

Wanted to write more Otis x Male Reader for all you guys out there so here you go!! A cute emotional support fluff piece!!!!! (Also be warned there's like one mild slur but no homophobia or anything cause this fic is happiness only zone)

"How are you feeling?" you ask Otis, squeezing his hand. He looks over to you, sulking. 

"Like a million fuckin' bucks, thanks for asking." 

You shove him playfully, which turns into a dunking match. You finally see a smile clear up Otis' face, but it quickly disappears when he remembers what he's about to do. 

Otis met you about a year ago, at a bar somewhere outside town. He had quickly discovered that you were different from other people in the area, just like him, and instead of taking you back to the house to Chik-Fil-A you, he ended up kinda... sorta... liking you. 

You two had talked for hours, and he had felt more and more attracted to not only your appearance, but your personality. Otis was very selective about who he gave his time to, and you just turned out to be his favorite person to be around. Otis had brought you around the house a few times, and after a good few months of walking in on some form of anarchy, you had been accepted as a good friend of the family's. 

Of course there was one thing that presented itself as an obstacle (at least for Otis). He was adamant that guys just didn't do things like this around here, that if anybody saw you two together, god forbid in public, you'd be strung up on Dr. Satan's hanging tree. You had insisted you cared for him enough to brave all that, and he cared for you too, so you had kept your relationship under wraps. 

Until now. 

Otis had said something the other day to you on one of your long drives together in your pickup. (It was a favorite date activity of the two of you, other than coming along for a night of murder and mayhem, to drive for hours out into the Texan desert listening to old 70s music, philosophizing, and talking about life.) 

"What if my family doesn't want me around anymore if I tell em?"

You had turned off the engine, and sat there in the middle of the dusty plain, Gerry Rafferty's Right Down The Line playing on your beat up old car radio. 

"Tell them what?"

Otis had sat there for a long time. "Y'know, about... this whole thing." You had waited expectantly for him to elaborate, since your talk about using words. Otis had huffed, rolling his eyes. "Us, okay! The two of us." 

"I'm fairly certain that your family, who regularly chases people around in bunny onesies and holds ceremonial funerals for fun, wouldn't much care who you date or fuck."

Otis throws his head back against the seat. "Yeah but shit, this is different! They let me in, gave me a name I'm proud of, gave me a home. My own biological father used to beat me, call me less than shit, and all for..." He gestured to you and him. "For bein' me, I guess."

"It's fucked up," you say softly, taking his hand. 

"Yeah, you got that fuckin' right handsome." He had wiped his eyes. "And them back home... hell. It'd be close to testing their kindness to tell them I'm a queer at this point."

A silence enveloped you both as you switched the radio off.

"Why don't you try?" 

"They don't gotta know," Otis snapped, then looked at you, apology clearly written in his eyes. You had just nodded, used to his hurried responses. 

"What I mean is... if you're ready... you might feel better finding out if they really are there for you." 

He had looked at you, and you took off your shirt, handing it to him to dry his eyes. He used it, and tossed it back to you in a ball. You had laughed, and he had climbed on top of you in the driver's seat, sticking his knife in the seat recliner to make it flop down. 

"Mmf," you had complained, his lips smothering yours, "Thanks for breaking my seat." 

"Ain't nothing but nothing."

"Bu--"

"RJ can fix it," he had replied, before reaching down to your jeans. 

Now, four days after that night, he decided he was ready.

Mostly. 

Somewhat.

"You know, you don't have to do it today if you're not ready," you reassure him, but he takes your hand, grasping it tightly. 

"Damn it all to hell if I haven't spent all morning working myself up to this. I'm not lettin' that go to waste." 

With his usual headstrong determination, he walks through the front door of the house, past Baby's burnt doll collection. He walks on into the living room, where Mama's on the couch watching some show with Baby, Spaulding is in the kitchen, and Tiny is carving a pumpkin at the table.

"Otis, I love you honey, but get the hell outta the way," Mama says sweetly, "Svengoolie's on." 

"Fuck Svengoolie," Otis responds, and Tiny looks up from his work at the table, unsettled. Otis holds up a reassuring hand to him, and Baby finally looks away from the TV.

"Brought your friend?" She lets out a giggle, and waves to you. You haven't told Otis, but you're convinced Baby knows about you two already. 

"I've... got an announcement to make." Otis shifts around from foot to foot, still holding your hand. Seeing that Otis is serious, (and that he's holding your hand) Mama turns off the TV. 

"Who turned off the god damn television? I was watching that," Spaulding comes walking out of the kitchen, scratching his back with a wooden cooking spoon. "Oh. Hiya, you two." He scratches his head with the spoon, raising his painted clown eyebrows when he notices Otis has now got your hand in a deathgrip. "Somethin' we oughtta know, or can we keep watching the show?"

"Daddy, Otis is in love," Baby coos. 

"Hush now, angel, let Otis have his moment," Mama hushes, "Go on now, hun, tell us." Otis gives Baby the finger angrily. Baby sticks her tongue out at him in turn, and you shake your head. 

"(y/n) and I... are..." He clears his throat about five times, and RJ comes in the door, making a racket.

"RJ, shut the door, Otis wants to tell us something real interesting!" Baby says. RJ frowns, looking over, and Otis rolls his eyes, trying to get back on track.

"We're..." Everyone in the room is hanging on the edge of their seat in anticipation. Even Tiny is sitting forward expectantly. "We're...."

"You're what? Spit it out boy, haven't got all day to listen to you goin' 'we're... we're...' like some kinda yokel fuckin idiot," Spaulding calls.

"Yeah!" Baby yells. Tiny nods. 

"We're together, you impatient assholes!!" Otis blurts, holding you close to him, "This guy here. And me. We're together."

"Well, we can see you're--" Mama starts, then she has an epiphany. "OH! Oh my goodness..."

Everyone is quiet for a moment. Spaulding takes a deep breath, and drops the spoon. "I, uh..." he murmurs, "I'll be in the shop." Everyone waits, listening to him peel out of the yard in his car, and Mama waves a hand his way. Then she starts clapping.

"Oh, honey!!"

"I knew you swung different ways, big bro," Baby grins, jumping up and prancing around him, "But it's real swell that ya opened up that big mouth of yours and told us!" Tiny comes over and nearly crushes you and Otis together in a hug. Otis coughs a few times, and swats at him. RJ walks over, smiles a little (the most you'd ever seen him do so) and slaps you both on the back so hard it sends you stumbling. Then he leaves out back, off to do whatever the fuck he does. 

"You guys... don't mind?" Otis asks, and you smile his way. 

"Mind?! What the hell've we gotta mind about, you two are in loooove!" Mama shrieks. She gives you a huge hug and pinches your cheek. "Love is a beautiful thing that must be celebrated, no matter who it is between."

"Hey you must be real talented off your feet to net this one, if you know what I mean sugar," Baby says to you, and you blush as Otis glares. 

"Cut it out." 

"You cut it out!" 

"Fuck you!" 

"Fuck you!" 

You clear your throat, and Otis takes his place beside you again. 

"And... what about Cutter?" Your boyfriend's voice wavers a little, and he probably hates himself for it. Spaulding is like a dad to him, even if the two are rarely on speaking terms. 

"Don't know why daddy left," Baby shrugs. "Seems fucking weird."

"Don't pay no nevermind to that old clown," Mama huffs, "Actually-- you know what? I say we eat the dinner he cooked, then go out and pay him a visit, see just where his head's at. That ain't like him to just up'n leave like that."

"No, I--"

"Come on y'all, we's having a banquet then we’s goin' to the gas station!"

So, after a very nice dinner, everyone piles into the family car. You have to sit on Otis' lap to fit, which is okay with you and okay with him. Once you get to the gas station, Mama stomps out, ready to tear Spaulding a new one... but instead, she gasps.

"Oh, it's so bea-utiful!"

"Jesus Christ, woman, I wasn't even done," Spaulding comes out, complaining. Your face lights up as Otis' jaw hangs open. Tiny grins, and Baby squeals as you all gather around the shop that now has rainbow flags adorning everything. 

"Oh my god," you whisper, chuckling, and Otis turns around, face red. He walks right back to the car and goes to get in, but everyone drags him back out. 

"What do ya think?" the clown beams, "I'd say I outdid myself." He pulls the string on his skull bowtie, and goes "yaiyaiyaiyai." 

"It's amazing," you tell him, "Thanks, Cap." He puts a hand on your shoulder.

"This is an event, son! This is a cause for goddamn celebration, ain't no way I'm gonna miss it." He turns to Otis. "Now I called Charlie, he's gonna bring the girls and the good shit then we're all gonna have a big party tonight." 

"Aw shitfire," Otis mutters. Spaulding's eyes widen. 

"I dare you to complain! You got no idea how hard it was to reach the ass-backwards fucker, let alone find all this multi-coloured bullcrap in rural Texas to build a shrine for your homo ass!" 

"You didn't fuckin' have to, Cutter, I didn't specifically request you throw me a big fuckin' gay bash!"

"You-- shut the fuck up. Charlie's comin'."  

"I hate Charlie, that fuckin' nutsack." 

"Well he hates you too, but that's just cause you're an asshole."

"Not wrong," Baby hisses, dodging Otis' swipe. You nudge him. 

"Your family's happy for you. This is better than what you were imagining would happen," you whisper to him, and he sighs, giving you one of those deep looks you know so well that conveys everything he's feeling to you without words. He hates attention, but deep down you know he loves feeling appreciated-- you know that from your own relationship experience with him. 

A cop car suddenly comes driving by, and the window rolls down. You always get worried when that happens, but the others are used to it. Otis takes a few steps in front of you, protectively, and holds your hand.��

"Hi there, folks," Wydell says, tipping his hat, "Just asking people in the area if they've seen a missing g--" 

"Sheriff Wydell, you miserable motherfucker, GUESS WHAT?! " Spaulding yells, "My son got himself a BOYFRIEND! The anti social one?! Roped in this one right here, ain't he a looker?!" Mama nods excitedly, waving one of the little rainbow flags and pointing at you. The Sheriff awkwardly frowns, and nods slowly, noticing all the rainbow paraphernalia around the station. 

"That's... real nice. Y-You folks... have a nice day, then..." 

"Holy shit," Otis whines, wishing he could crawl underground to the family catacombs, and you kiss him on the cheek happily. 

"Here," Spaulding starts passing greasy paper bags around to everyone. "Tasty fried chicken for everyone to get this shindig going!" 

"Alright, fuck yeah," Baby giggles, and goes to dig inside for some booze as well. 

"Your chicken is fucking disgusting," Otis mutters, handing his extra bag to Tiny, though he can't help but smile a little. Spaulding gets right in his face with a pointed finger. 

"Boy, I'mma let you get away with your ass today, cause you're finally OUT OF THE CLOSET!" 

"Announce it to the whole state of Texas, why don't you old man?" Otis retorts, hiding deeper in his plaid sweater. You have to laugh. Tiny joins in, grabbing a rainbow party blower and deafening everyone. He then picks you up and puts you on his shoulders, and starts dancing, poking Otis to join in. 

"Oh, I... okay, stoppit, all of you, I just... alright, enough! Tiny, stop!"

"Ohh, but this is so exciting, baby!" Mama grins, trailing her flowy dress around. 

"Hell yeah!" Baby calls from inside, coming out with armfuls of beer, "My brother's got himself a pretty boy, let's get fucked up and do fucked up shit!"

Tiny plops a rainbow party hat on top of Otis' head, and your boyfriend sighs. 

"You know at this point, I would've preferred you kicked me out of the family or something."

"We'd never do that to ya, big bro," Baby smiles, leaning on his shoulder, "You're one of us." She turns to you. "And now it looks like you are too, (y/n)." 

Otis looks at you in irritation. "Lucky for you, babe." 

"I actually think I am pretty lucky," you smile, and embrace a big Firefly Family hug.  

[allisonjournals]

Rollercoaster.

That’s what this journey has been this past month or two. I went to my hematologist appointment today. It was at a cancer center. I’ll lay out my time there for my own memory.

I got there at 12:30. Filled out paperwork about myself, my symptoms, my family health history, etc. Around 12:45 I met with a woman who gave me a booklet about the cancer center and information if I had questions. She took my photo and sent me to the lab to get my blood drawn.

In the lab, I had about 8 vials of my blood taken. I’ve been sick and weak the past few months (and I’m on the heavy days of my period) and my arm went numb. I started to feel a little dizzy, but I stayed strong when the phlebotomist told me I had amazing hair. I was shocked, as I had recently cut my hair into a pixie, and it hasn’t looked the best lately. She commented on the shiny color and thickness. I thanked her and felt better, despite my discomfort.

After that I was guided to the floor where my doctor’s office was. Apparently my paperwork got misplaced twice during this moving process. I waited a couple minutes before going into a room. A nurse took my vitals. My normal vitals usually indicate my low blood pressure. Today it was high! My heart rate was 100 BPM. I felt dizzy and a little nervous. I couldn’t slow my heart rate by relaxing and breathing slowly. The nurse told me I had a low grade fever and said a nurse practitioner would be in shortly.

After the nurse practitioner entered she asked why I had stopped in. I told her. I’ve had a history of low white blood cell count, I’ve been sick non stop for three years with various viral infections, sinus infections, uti’s, I’ve had mouth ulcers, prolonged bruising, bone and joint pain. I told her about the history of cancer in my family. Grandpa melanoma, prostate, leukemia. Grandma lymphoma, breast. I told her I’ve been feeling a little sick with a cough and was uncomfortable swallowing because of mucus. I told her my wrist joints were aching. She took notes and said the doctor would come in shortly. This was at 1:34.

Up until this point I was preparing for what I’ve been imagining for weeks. A 20 minute conversation discussing what could be wrong, a possible solution, possible hope for answers. I’ve never been so let down in my life. That sounds so dramatic, but I left feeling more frustrated than anything.

Around 1:40 the doctor entered and asked me how I was feeling. I told him I’ve been sick for 3 months with a viral infection. He asked me where I was from - I told him the city in Alabama. He then asked “where did you grow up?” I told him Minnesota. He then commented on my accent. He proceeded to tell me that my blood counts were completely normal. He said they would run other tests but he didn’t expect to find anything. He told me to make an appointment for a checkup in three months.

And then he left.

I should have asked questions. I should have asked for explanations. But I let him walk out. I was surprised “wow my levels were normal? That’s great but, I still feel sick” I thought. He walked into another patients room as I wanted to ask him questions. I never got my chance. He left around 1:44.

A four minute meeting. Wow.

He never asked if I had any questions. He never acted like he cared about me as a patient. He was get in get out. In my disappointment, I asked the office for a copy of my Complete Blood Count (CBC), just because I couldn’t believe that my levels were normal. When I got them in my hands my heart sank. I’m not a doctor. I fully acknowledge that... I’m not claiming to know more than a hematologist... but...

A month ago my white blood cell count was at 2.8. The normal range is around 4-11. Two weeks later my white blood cell count was 3.3. It was getting better, so I had hoped this time it would be higher.

Today’s appointment, that I waited weeks to get, jumped through insurance hoops and stressful days waiting, hours of driving to arrive...Today, my white blood cell count was 3.1.

Still low. The other numbers were all consistent.

As I said before, I’m not a doctor. Maybe it is normal. But I just wish he had explained it to me. Why is that normal? Isn’t that low for most people? Did he think that number was fluctuating because I have been fighting this infection? Did he forget that I’ve been fighting it for almost 4 months now? Did he forget my other symptoms? I don’t know what they tested for. I don’t know if they’ll call me to tell me more results. I don’t know why he scheduled me again for blood tests in 3 months. I have no answers. I feel worse than when I went. I feel more clueless. More hopeless. More frustrated.

I can confidently say that it’s because my doctor didn’t communicate with me. He could have spent five more minutes explaining the tests, my options, anything. Offering to answer my questions. But I felt as if he just needed to check me off his box. “Yep, I saw her. Good enough.” I didn’t feel like he cared. Like he wanted to help me at all. I felt like a statistic. I felt unheard and unimportant.

I know that’s not what he intended. I don’t know his character, his history, his personality. I don’t know what kind of bad day he may or may not have been having. I just know how I felt as his patient. He didn’t do any examination. He didn’t feel my lymph nodes or my stomach or any routine things a doctor might check since I said I’ve been sick for months. He only asked me about my current status and about my northern accent. He didn’t really do anything. He told me my count was normal when two doctors told me it wasn’t. They referred me there for a reason, but this doctor saw no issue with my low white blood cell count over a month of testing. My CBC sheet says: WBC 4.3-10.1 (normal range) - patient’s level: 3.1. It is clearly well below the normal range considering the low numbers.

I plan to call the office tomorrow just to ask about the tests they took. To get an understanding and to voice my feelings. All of the other staff were wonderful. They were very helpful and welcoming. But where it mattered most to me, my doctor didn’t seem to care about my aches and pains. Trying to figure out with me what is going on.

Is he just going to tell me I’m fine and nothing’s wrong? He didn’t say anything about how I could be anemic or that he suspects A, B, or C. He told me he doubted they would find anything.

What? How can you doubt there is anything wrong, yet you want me to come back in three months for more tests? I have to wait three months to find out if my white blood count is low again?

Out of all the blood tests I’ve had taken in the last three years, my white blood cell count has been low. That’s 4 separate tests now. 3 which have been taken in the last two months. If my white blood cells are considered normal to him, I’d like to hear why. Instead, I feel like he lied to me. Or read my sheet wrong. Or didn’t feel like he needed to explain, and to save time decided not to.

I am probably blowing this fully or partially out of proportion, but I don’t care. This is how I feel.

I just woke up from a nap with a fever and night sweats. I woke up with a very bad migraine that made me feel like I needed to puke. Now, I sit typing this because I think my migraine stemmed from my frustration. I just feel “in the dark;” I guess, that’s all. I’m disappointed.

My last post was so optimistic. I don’t want to feel this way. I don’t want to be a baby, but here I am at 11pm sitting on my floor in the dark, crying as I type this.

[shrekshugebadussy]

i went the er last night. i knew there was going to be a wait time but they were so fucking busy that i was there for about 12hrs. i arrived about 5:30p and after awhile they got me checked in. about 7:45p they called me back and took some stuff for labs, gave me an iv, and then stuck me back out into the waiting room (~9:30ish) with my iv while they waited for an open bed in the actual er. i went thru my iv bag pretty quickly (within a half hour) and i ended up sitting there for about another 2hrs with an empty bag and a coughing kid that ended up having the flu and wasn’t wearing a mask 🥲. my mom had to ask two nurses to come and either change my iv or take it away, and finally the second one came right away to take care of it.

and then here’s the thing. i have no idea how much longer i would’ve waited to get a bed… bcuz right after she took the iv, at about a little after midnight, i ended up passing out 2x in the waiting room. (i also hadn’t eaten anything that day and was dehydrated and very anxious) that they ended up taking me right back. there they took more stuff for labs and gave me another iv. i ended up waiting until about 4:30ish-5a for them to finally come get me for the cat scan they ordered about 8/9ish. they then didn’t come until a little after that to finally go over all of my test results.

they were mad busy like holy shit

but my test results all came back fine and good. the only one that was more so inconclusive was my urine sample and that was bcuz i wasn’t given a wipe to use beforehand. so they ended up putting me on another but different antibiotic than the one i just off of for my uti and a pain med for my abdominal and back pain.

they also said they were going to check my blood sugar level after the event in the waiting room but they never said anything about it after they took more samples for testing so i’m guessing i was fine??

anyways, i got home about 6am this morning and i was able to finally get some sleep. i was supposed to have a hair appointment today but my body has gone thru a lot this year alone let alone last night, and i still feel nauseous and faint at times. my pains gone down tho since they gave me the first antibiotic dose before discharge, so that’s nice.

anyways, i could keep going on about some of the other patients that were waiting (the one older man who was practically be racist and an overall Boomer™️) but it might be long lol

so here’s to hoping that this will finally be it and i can go back to feeling better and be able to live every day normally again 😭🥲🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻 i am practically begging.

[magicalmischel]

Falling for You CH2

CHAPTER 2 - Angels Don’t Need Sleep

This wasn't the first time Arthur hated his chainmail more than he hated boring council meetings his father had him sit through. But this was certainly the first time that he was genuinely worried he might die because of a piece of metal that was supposed to protect him. And the first time that he knew his death would result in another death – if he didn't come back with the flower, Morgana would surely die.

No matter what, he just had to come back. He had to survive. But the enormous spiders crawling up the cave wall weren't making it any easier, especially when he had only one arm to keep himself balanced and his heavy armour was making it even harder to move up and reach the flower, let alone get out of the cave. The only way out was up, and gravity wasn't exactly on his side.

Arthur took a few quick breaths and then tried to kill another spider with his sword. He missed. But on the second try, he managed to throw it down the seemingly bottomless pit that he tried hard not to think about.

Just as he was about to climb another inch up, a strange blue light orb appeared next to him, giving him light and as if looking at him.

"Come on then! What are you waiting for?! Finish me off!" Arthur yelled at it, barely holding on to the wall. The witch he had just met was most probably just making sure he was dead, or she wanted to watch his death through this magical light orb.

Arthur tried to swing his sword at it, but he missed and couldn't try again because of more spiders. In the end, he stopped worrying about the orb because at least it was giving him light and it wasn't attacking him. He used it to his advantage and fought off the spiders, climbing up inch by inch, until he finally reached the flower. He hid it inside his belt and turned back to the cave wall, eyeing the light orb suspiciously.

It was just... floating there, keeping an eye on him, as if observing him. Waiting and giving him its bluish white light. It didn't seem dangerous... Arthur shook his head and started climbing up again, killing another spider and then finally getting out of the cave, emerging in the middle of a forest next to a huge hole in the ground.

He lay down on the grass and closed his eyes, still feeling the orb above him. When he opened his eyes though, it flew away and he found himself in darkness again. As quickly as he could, he stood up and checked if he still had his flower. When he was sure it was still tucked under his belt, he smiled and looked around.

It was only then when he noticed someone was hiding behind a tree.

"Hello?" He called. "Is it you again? Are you too afraid to show up? Your spiders didn't work! Is that really all you've got?" He drew his sword and pursed his lips. He knew he shouldn't be playing with the witch like that, she had a very big advantage on her side – magic. She might as well throw him back into the cave.

That was why he quickly stepped away from the hole and pointed his sword at the tree that someone was hiding behind.

To his surprise, the one he was talking to peeked at him. It was a boy, a young dark-haired boy with... Arthur's eyes widened and his hand with the sword dropped to his waist. "Are those wings?" He mumbled. Then he regained his posture and frowned. "Who are you! Speak!"

The boy stepped away from the tree, his huge white wings knocking into a twig from the tree he was hiding behind. He hissed and moved his wings closer to his back and then he looked up at the prince with his eyes wide and curious and a little bit scared.

"Y-you can s-see me?" He stuttered.

Arthur frowned. "Of course I can see you." He said, not putting away his sword. Not yet. He looked up at the wings and back down at the boy. Then a thought crossed his mind. "Are you a sorcerer?" He asked. He was genuinely curious, but also on high alert. All sorcerers were evil, weren't they?

"What?" The boy laughed softly and he made a few steps towards Arthur, stopping when he saw Arthur tightened his grip on the hilt of the sword. "I'm not a sorcerer, I'm a... um... I'm not supposed to be here." He avoided the question. But Arthur wasn't one to argue with.

"Who are you then?" He asked. "If you had anything to do with king Bayard and his pois-"

"No, not at all, no." The boy said. "Look, you're not even supposed to see me, I... uh..." he scratched his head and swallowed. Then he shrugged and looked up at the trees and made a few steps closer to Arthur again. It surprised him how unalarmed the boy was by Arthur's sword.

"Will you answer my question then? Who are you?" Arthur demanded. "And are those wings? Answer me!"

The boy looked at Arthur and there was pain in his eyes. "No, sorry, I can't."

"What do you mea-"

With that and without letting Arthur finish his another question, the boy spread his wings and used them to fly up into the dark night. Arthur looked up, but he couldn't see him in the dark.

He was alone again.

Arthur looked around a few times, still keeping his sword in his hand, but in the end, he sheathed it again and went to look for his horse to get back to Camelot in time. Morgana's life depended on him after all.

xoXÖXox

Merlin kept flying until he was sure the prince couldn't see him anymore and couldn't follow him. He stopped in mid-air, beating his wings and looking around before he slowly landed in between the trees in the forest and looked up through the branches.

All he could see were hundreds of stars and the moon and clouds. No heaven, no Garden, no angels, not even Will. Merlin sighed and frowned, wrapping his wings around himself.

He screwed up. Seriously. Humans were never supposed to see angels unless it was completely necessary. And that was rare. He was a young angel and didn't even have a human and he wasn't supposed to just go down here and let Arthur see him, let alone talk to him. That was unacceptable.

Merlin shivered and frowned. He felt something... on his forearms. When he moved his wings and looked at his arms, he saw what it was. Goosebumps. He was cold. He's never experienced this, the temperature in the Garden was always perfect.

He gritted his teeth and looked up at the sky. "Nunc viribus uti volo. Volo ad caelos!"

But nothing happened. He tried again, louder, but before he could finish, he saw something move in the dark forest. He quickly spread his wings and flew up to a branch, noticing it was only a squirrel.

"Nunc viribus uti volo. Volo ad caelos! Obsecro!"

The night was still cold, the forest was dark and the stars were the same above him. Nothing happened and he was still alone. And afraid. With fear in eyes, he realized he had no idea how to get back home and that he was stuck down here, on Earth. Among humans. With his wings.

Thinking about them, he realized they were his only hope for help. He could use them to get to the only place he could – the only place he knew on Earth – Camelot.

But what about his wings? Oh, right. "I can make them invisible." He whispered and hit himself in his forehead with his palm. He was such an idiot! Why hadn't he hidden them from Arthur before?! Then he would have thought Merlin was only a lost boy or something and he wouldn't have pointed his sword at him. But it was too late for that, and Arthur knew he wasn't human.

Actually, Arthur was his only help because he was the only human who saw him, and Merlin had to keep it that way. He had to find Arthur and ask him for help. It was his only way back to heaven.

None of the angles were expecting to find one of their own on Earth, let alone in the middle of a forest. They were watching over their humans, not over squirrels. Which was why Merlin had to get to Camelot too. He was sure one of the angels was watching someone in that castle and maybe someone would notice him and save him. But, not every angel in heaven knew him...

Merlin closed his eyes and sighed. No matter what, Camelot was his only chance. He spread his wings again and flew above the trees, flying back to where he met Arthur and then quickly following his footsteps, walking on his own. He wasn't in the forest anymore and there was always the possibility he could meet someone on his way to the castle. He could make himself invisible and just fly there, but... to be honest, now that he was on Earth, finally breathing in the air around him and seeing the nature from so close... he really wanted to walk to Camelot on his own and spend some time in nature. So he only hid his wings and started walking, hoping he'd find Arthur on the way or in the castle.

xoXÖXox

Arthur left his horse in the stables and ran back into the castle, right into Gaius' chambers. He gave him the Mortaeus flower and then ran for fresh water, while Gaius worked on the antidote, and when he returned, it was done. They quickly poured it into a little vial and left the quarters, heading back to Morgana's chambers.

The prince was worried about her. She wasn't really his sister, but it felt like that. And he knew they were usually just insulting each other and bickering, but he loved her. And he wouldn't be able to live with himself if he was too late and let her die.

Once they opened the door, Uther raised his head and Arthur could see rage in them.

"Arthur!" He called. "Where have you been? I have sent guards to find you, I-"

"We have the antidote!" Arthur interrupted him, thankful that the rage in his father's eyes got replaced by surprise and hope.

"Hurry then," Uther gestured towards his ward that was lying in bed. Arthur watched as Gaius came to her and opened her mouth, pouring the potion in and then closing it.

That was the first time Arthur noticed the blisters on her skin. His eyes widened and fear gripped his heart. He hoped they weren't too late. Her skin was pale and she looked as if she was dead. Arthur couldn't see her like that, but with every passing second, his hope kept slipping away.

Finally, Morgana gasped and started coughing.

"Morgana!" Uther smiled and leaned closer to her, together with Gaius and Arthur and Morgana's maid that he didn't notice was in the room with them too. They all let out a huge sigh of relief, and while Gaius took Uther away to tell him something in private, Arthur sat down on the edge of his sister's bed.

"How are you feeling?" He asked her, his voice uncharacteristically soft.

"As if I got run over by a horse." Morgana smiled up at him. She still looked pale and he could clearly see how weak she was. Then she frowned. "You don't look so good yourself. What happened?"

Arthur shrugged. "I went on a day-long trip. To find a flower that would save your life."

"Oh, you did, didn't you?" Morgana smirked as she closed her eyes. "I knew you cared about me." And before Arthur could answer, Morgana reached out her hand towards her maid. "Gwen?"

"I'm here, my lady." The girl answered, taking her hand.

"What time is it? How long was I unconscious?" She asked, finally opening her eyes and finding Gwen's face after a few seconds.

"It's close to midnight. You were unconscious the whole day." Gwen told her, squeezing her hand and smiling. "But the prince saved your life, now you're going to be alright."

Morgana nodded.

"She needs rest," Gaius turned to them, just as Uther turned around with a grim expression.

"But-"

"No buts, Morgana." Gaius shook his head. "As your doctor, I know what's best for you. Now shush, and try to sleep. It's late."

Morgana nodded and sighed.

"Sleep well," Arthur told her as he left the bed and walked over to his father. Uther was just speaking to the guards, but Arthur didn't hear what he told them. And he didn't care. He's been stuck on a cave wall for at least an hour and now he needed to get to his bed otherwise he might pass out right there in Morgana's chambers.

He left her rooms and walked back to his own chambers, opening the doors and closing his eyes. He was exhausted and would prefer a bath, but it was too late for that and his manservant was already asleep, wherever he lived.

"Hello." Someone said and Arthur immediately opened his eyes and reached for his sword, realizing it was not there. He must have left it on his horse.

As he looked up with bare hands, he frowned. The dangerous intruder in his chambers was the boy he met in the forest. The boy with wings that... Arthur couldn't see now. Did he even have wings? Was it only some magic trick? "You followed me here?" He asked, slowly moving towards his table, where he'd left his dagger from earlier that day.

The boy shrugged. "I had nowhere else to go." He told him. Then he stepped forward with his hands up in surrender. "Please, I didn't come here to hurt you. The light you saw in the cave... that was me."

"So you are a sorcerer!" Arthur frowned and considered calling the guards, but he couldn't be faster than any spell and he was already too close to the table.

"I'm not a sorcerer." The boy hurriedly said.

"Then what about the wings I saw!" Arthur asked him, finally reaching the dagger and pointing it at the boy, but he didn't seem alarmed.

"I'm sorry, you weren't supposed to see them." He said and looked at the dagger in Arthur's hands. "No mortal blade can kill me, sorry." He apologized again, making Arthur frown.

"What if this isn't a mortal blade?" Arthur tried, knowing damn well it was a normal dagger.

The boy pursed his lips. "It is, I can feel it."

"How?" Arthur asked, but the boy only shrugged again. So Arthur tried another question, far more important. "What are you doing here? Why did you follow me?"

The boy's shoulders slumped. "I... I need your help."

xoXÖXox

Merlin saw that Arthur paused and stayed silent for a while, probably thinking about what to do. Merlin didn't have to say anything to use his powers in a small way, for example, he could read minds. And he knew Arthur was hesitating right now, deciding if he should use the dagger or call the guards or demand more answers.

"Well?" Merlin asked. He wasn't very patient.

Arthur pursed his lips but didn't hide his dagger. "Prove that you're not evil. If you want my help, I need to know what you need from me and why you want it and why should I help you."

Merlin sighed and went over to sit on Arthur's bed. Arthur didn't seem to mind... a lot. So Merlin moved his hand and made his wings visible again.

"You want answers." He said. "I've already broken a couple of rules, but in order to get home, I need your help, and for your help I need to prove I'm good and tell you more, which means breaking more rules, but I guess I'll have to do it because I already miss the Garden an-"

"Could you please start making sense?" Arthur stopped him. He put the dagger into his belt and slowly sat down on a chair at the table. "You can start by telling me who you are."

Merlin sighed again. "I'm... not a sorcerer. You can see my wings now, and I doubt you've ever seen a sorcerer with wings."

"True." Arthur nodded and looked at Merlin's white wings warily. "So you are..."

"An angel." Merlin finished for him and smiled. "You probably won't believe me right away, but I'm here and I'm real. And I need to get back home."

"And you want my help with that?" Arthur laughed. "Even if you were an angel... I'm only a human. How do you expect me to help you?"

"Well, I'm not sure exactly." Merlin frowned. "I don't know how to get home and I know you won't know how to do that either, but I was kind of hoping someone from heaven would notice I'm missing and the biggest chance that they do is if I stay here, where there's a lot of people that my brothers and sisters watch over."

"You're not making sense again." Arthur rubbed his eyes, yawning. "So... you want to get home, and I need to help you... how?"

"You'll let me stay here." Merlin smiled at him. He couldn't believe he was actually talking to Arthur. To a human. To the very human, he wanted to protect once he returned to heaven.

"And if I let you stay here, what do I get for it?" Arthur asked. "Why shouldn't I just call the guards now and let them take you to the dungeons?"

"See this?" Merlin pointed at his wings that disappeared again. "I can make myself invisible, so you would look like a fool if you called them for nothing." When Arthur frowned, Merlin quickly added, "but of course I can't make you let me stay. But... you know, I'm an angel in need and you're human, so if you help me, I guess... you'll go to heaven once you die."

"That is if you are an angel though and aren't lying." Arthur pointed out. "What if I die young? What if I die tomorrow and won't be able to help you?"

"I'll do everything in my power not to let you die." Merlin told him honestly and smiled, standing up. He was glad that Arthur didn't reach for his dagger this time. "I know who you are, and although I'm too young to have a human to protect, I want it to be you. And once I'm back in heaven, I'll make sure you're okay."

"That's... nice?" Arthur raised his eyebrows but was still frowning. "Um... I need leave." Arthur stood up and put the dagger into his belt. Merlin quickly searched his mind and found out he wanted to go to that old physician that he saw by Morgana's bed in the pond.

"People can't know I'm here." Merlin took a step closer to him. "Please think twice before you tell someone. I'm in hiding. Humans shouldn't see me at all, this was really just a huge mistake." Merlin confessed and sat back on the bed.

Arthur didn't say anything and quickly left his chambers, not saying anything to the guards in the hall. Merlin smiled to himself and lay down on the bed.

He just actually talked to Arthur.

He couldn't believe how easy it was to find him and talk to him and let him see his wings and all of that. He'd thought it would be much harder. Well, actually, when he was still in heaven he thought he'd never get the chance to talk to Arthur, but seeing how easy it was now, he was glad he messed up the spell and ended up here.

He wouldn't even mind if the angels didn't find him at all. He never really felt at home in heaven. It was his home of course, and he loved it. But he always liked to watch the Earth in the pond. He loved to watch Arthur especially.

His cheeks started to feel little warmer than usual and he quickly touched them, hurrying to the mirror on the wall. Was he... blushing? Why was he blushing? Merlin shook his head and smiled to himself when he thought about Arthur again. He'd love to be his angel, but at the same time, that thought made him sad. If he returned to heaven and became Arthur's angel, he would never talk to him again. He would just watch his life from afar.

Merlin sighed and went to sit down on the bed again. He didn't know what to do. He was used to not sleeping at all and having all the time in the world, but the Earth was so interesting and he wanted to explore as much as he could. But at the same time, he was stuck in Arthur's rooms and it wouldn't be appropriate to just go through his things.

So he lay down and sighed again, suddenly feeling something he's never felt before. His eyes closed on their own, and he didn't fight it. And within the next few seconds, he was asleep.

Translation

- "Nunc viribus uti volo. Volo ad caelos!" - I wish to use my powers now. I wish to return to heaven. - "Nunc viribus uti volo. Volo ad caelos! Obsecro!" - I wish to use my powers now. I wish to return to heaven. Please!

CH1      /      CH3

[paumeranian]

Interview #4

13/3/19

Tell me about a time where you started feeling symptoms. What did you do? How did you feel in that moment? (How important is it to you to get these symptoms checked out? How long you do you typically wait before doing so? Why?)

Looking in the distance

Late at night coughing really hard and there was blood in my mucus (3 am), dad said to just go to sleep if I can and we’ll go to the doctor the next day

I couldn’t do anything

Didn’t feel life threatening it just felt a bad symptom for something

Next day I went to the doctor (missed out on school)

I felt scared, there was blood so I was panicking, crazy, I didn’t know what was going on so I wanted to get it checked ASAP

Did a blood test, doctor said it should be fine until results from that are received

Public hospitals: you wait, with a lot of people and they’re sick, I’m germaphobic and when people start coughing - like I’m already sick I don’t wanna get sick even more and w/ public hospitals there ARE a lot of people waiting, I was like 15 years old so I was “weirded out”

Tell me about your healthcare provider. Is your doctor/GP available via booking an appointment or is it a walk-in clinic?

Used to go to the public union health centre, went here when the TB scare happened

Transferred to a private one

How would you compare the public and private services?

Waiting for private is faster as it’s appointment-based whereas for the public you just walk in, which is handy in some situations if you forget to book it

With private, they’ll check you at a specific time and sometimes I do still wait about 10-15 minutes from my booking time but life happens. It’s still long but definitely not as long as you would wait at a public clinic (1 hr) and the doctors are in a rush… They’re just like “alright what do you feel? Blah blah blah” They do the best they can and send you off

Better accuracy

They can’t assume a lot of things immediately till they get blood test results

How important is it for you to see the same doctor?

I think it’s kind of important because you learn to trust the doctor and they get to know you a bit more - knows your previous health history and you’ve already explained it to them

But with new doctors you have to explain those again

People with no proper understanding of health and diseases tend to not tell enough to the doctor (symptoms) or miss out details that could be important while if you constantly talk to one doctor, if you miss something out the next time they’ll get to know what you missed out. The more you see him the more they know what you’re feeling and can give better accuracy in the diagnosis. So I think it’s very important

How did you find the process of switching from one doctor to another?

I personally didn’t do it, parents sorted it out as we have health insurance

Depends on the pack that you get but I’m pretty sure all my family gets health insurance and they pay for it

Once I had to pay my own money but mum said for me to ask for the receipt and “they’ll” reimburse me

I don’t know, living with parents they don’t really tell me anything I just tell them to book me an appointment

I’m not hands on with insurance, I just book the appointment and go do it. Pay if I have to and give the receipt to my parents and they do the paper work.

Imagine if your parents didn’t have to do that for you, do you think you’d have a harder time looking out for yourself?

I think I’d have an easier time, I’ll end up seeing doctors way more e.g. I feel this and that

But when you tell your parents about how you’re feeling they’ll just be like “it’s fine give it a day or two”

You can go to any private clinic all they ask for is your proof of residence (this is important) Tourists have to pay for more

That’s it really. It’s pretty simple

Mum told me to go on a website, it’s pretty easy and then you just pay afterwards.

Do you think if your parents weren’t in charge of your healthcare you’d be at the same doctor?

I’ll probably go scout for other ones, especially closer ones since that’s all the way down in ___

I’d ask people that have lived here their whole lives, they have doctors that they go to all the time, know more doctors

There’s a few people in the health industry that I know and would ask them who’s a good doctor

All doctors should technically be all good, but some are friendlier than others and that definitely helps with ease of talking and giving them your symptoms

When was your last visit to the doctor?

Last year, round about March, I thought I had UTI so I had that checked and the doctor said if it is, it’s very mild

It was pretty easy, they did a normal UTI test, gave me antibiotics and a week later he said to come back

After a week I was once and I came back for a follow-up checkup and that was it.

It was simple, clean, and probably the best experience - they just gave me prescription right away

How do you usually feel during your checkups?

It depends on the symptoms I got, when you’re coughing up blood you’re obviously scared, bleeding from your insides is pretty terrifying cause you don’t know what’s happening - especially cause there was a lot of blood

SO when you go to the doctor for that you’rescared that there’s something really bad going on

But with something like an UTI, little pain, you get it checked

It varies with what the symptoms are like

For the TB I was definitely more scared, what’s wrong with me am I dying, is there something wrong with my lungs

They do more things, put you through an MRI, x-ray, all these things - it’s definitely very scary

How long was the actual check-up?

20 minutes, made me do a bunch of tests including a urine sample

Talked me through it, explained what I could have, how to treat it - it was pretty fast all considering

We talked quite a bit, we’re the same ethnicity so he tried to relate to me asked me about my background

It was pretty fast, pretty clean

I generally take information pretty quickly, I don’t need a lot of time to process

Some people are way more curious and gonna ask more questions which is important since it concerns your health

But I only ask quick questions, how long am I gonna be on this medication, are there any bad side effects - these are basically all the questions I ask not like what if I have this disease

I am generally a curious person - I ask the extent of the treatment and how it will affect me, with very mild antibiotics it’s fine

Tell me about how your provider explained potential diagnoses and solutions. Were you able to understand clearly the benefits or side effects if any of medication you’re given?

Use UTI example

Tell me about a significant clinical experience you can recall (either positive or negative). Why was it significant? How did you feel in that moment? Why did you feel that way? Do most check-ups with your provider turn out like this?

Already answered this at the start

Can you comment on the quality of care you typically receive in relation to the cost of a check-up? Rate the cost from:

_ Very affordable     _ Affordable           _ Expensive             _ Very expensive

4 - In my opinion price isn’t that high as there are more expensive things

I don’t have a lot of comparison, just the public one which is free

Private one now costs about $40 per appointment and I don’t know if they had a student discount of not

Booked online, but if I compare it to free $40 is quite a lot

I haven’t consulted other clinics so I wouldn’t know if the level of payment I’m giving is way too high or low

From what I can tell from their services, $40 is fine, it was quick and they were informative, they seem very competent, really good doctors, they tell you things very straightforward and clearly, good performance and facility

I don’t know if $40 counts as mid-range, but from my experience at least what I got it’s good

Check-up wise the service is pretty good

Have you tried asking if it’s cheaper for students?

No I didn’t even think about it to be honest

I keep forgetting that students can get things for cheaper because students are broke as hell

It’s not made obvious to me at least that I can

Usually there’s just prices everywhere, they just tell you the general price but somewhere down the list there’s usually a student price

Sometimes you just forget

I don’t use that since for buying food or petrol there’s no student prices

So I don’t think “oh I need to get the student price”

If they made it more obvious I’ll definitely get it

Overall, can you tell me how satisfied or dissatisfied you are with your healthcare provider?

I’m satisfied, I give it a solid 4

I think 5 would be like you go there and immediately go go into the room but usually there’s a bit of delay

Personal reflection: In my opinion, this interviewee provided me with the most insights about private vs public healthcare providers and how a person’s reaction to symptoms depends on how severe they are which affects their decision whether or not to take it to the doctor. Luke is naturally talkative which made it easy to just sit there and listen and observe. Because of this I didn’t have to ask some of my questions as he’s already answered them prior in detail.

[battybat-boss]

Alabama Senior Citizen Medically Kidnapped and Forced onto Drugs Against Family Wishes

Nancy Scott is very concerned about her mother's well-being, and now she cannot even talk to her. Photo supplied by family.

Commentary by Health Impact News/MedicalKidnap.com Staff

Just as Child Protective Services and a judge have almost omnipotent, unchecked power to decide unilaterally that the relationship between a parent and a young child is not worthy of being preserved, Adult Protective Services and a probate judge have the same power to sever the relationship between an adult child and their elderly parent.

Sometimes the relationship has endured for longer than the judge and social worker combined have been alive, yet with the stroke of a pen, a senior citizen can be completely torn away from their own children.

The wishes of the elder can be completely ignored, and documents assigning power of attorney to a trusted adult child can become meaningless. Medical and financial decisions are placed into the hands of a court-appointed guardian who is often a stranger to everyone in the family.

Nancy Scott, a retired English teacher from south Alabama, wrote to Health Impact News describing the medical kidnapping of her 102-year-old mother, who is also a beloved retired schoolteacher known to her former students as “Ms. Gregory.”

St. Vincent's Hospital and the Alabama Department of Human Resources (DHR) seized custody of Marian (Gregory) Leonard in February 2018. She is being held against her will, forced by a Jefferson County, Alabama, court into Hospice care, even though she has no terminal illness or disease. She is elderly, but her mind is sound.

Nancy has always enjoyed a close relationship with her mother, but she has not seen her since midsummer. At that time, Ms. Gregory begged to go home. She told Nancy:

If you don't get me out of here, they're going to kill me, and they're going to kill you.

She is being drugged against her will and has told her daughter that she doesn't want the drugs. There have been times that medical staff have said that Ms. Gregory had dementia, but Nancy says that this is because of the unnecessary psychotropic drugs that doctors put her on. When she was under care of doctors who removed the medications, her mental state drastically improved.

Ms. Gregory's Story as Told by her Daughter

Here is their story in Nancy Scott's words, written just before her visits were stopped:

My mother, a 102 year- old retired English teacher from south Alabama, wakes up every morning and asks, “When can we go home?”

And I tell her every day, “I'm working on getting us home.”

Home is south Alabama, known as the “Wiregrass.” My mother has been in the custody of the Alabama Department of Human Resources since February 1, 2018. I now have a very good attorney, but the first attorneys I had, did absolutely nothing except take my money and never filed an appearance. I just hope it's not too late.

Medical kidnapping usually involves a child or children, but in my situation, my elder mother-was kidnapped by the Alabama DHR. She was in St. Vincent's Hospital for what would have been a 3-4 day stay because of a UTI and a mild case of the flu.

DHR issued a court order for “protective custody” on February 1, 2018, and stated in the order that she could not leave the hospital without a court order. I was not allowed to know what I was accused of because DHR sealed the records. One attorney I hired was also not allowed access to the records. The first GAL leaked some of the information to me along with other “grapevine” news.

I finally learned that I was accused by DHR of taking my mother from a facility against medical advice. However, I provided a report from a physician at a local hospital who had given me full permission-and his blessings-to take her out of the facility on the day she and I left.

[Note: documentation of this has been provided to Health Impact News.]

No allegations of abuse or neglect can be found in the (almost) five years I've been taking care of my mother. A couple of phone calls by DHR could have proven that I did not take my mother anywhere against medical advice (and never have). However, DHR jumped into the case. Now after spending several thousand dollars of the tax payers' money, this organization is still trying to find something to justify the hasty, costly decision to take charge of my mother.

Since she has been in “protective custody,” my mother has gone from getting up every day, eating a regular diet, and sitting in a recliner, to being bedridden. She has asked to get up, but Hospice has said, “No.” She left St. Vincent's with bedsores.

St. Vincent's Hospital, Birmingham, Alabama. Photo source.

After the medication overdoses at this hospital, it's a miracle she is alive. The doctors at St. Vincent's assured me they were not giving her any medication--she refused to eat or drink for one month and slept most of the time. After a family friend (another physician) came to the hospital to check on her, I learned what she had been given.

The hospitalists in charge of my mother's care at St. Vincent's had been giving her Scopolamine, the “date rape” drug, and then proceeded to label her as “demented.” They also gave her Haldol and Ativan (against my written request not to do so).

These doctors also gave her a cough medicine that she could not metabolize. The guidelines for avoiding such medications were in her hospital records, and I reminded them to check this medication against her medical allergies.

She almost died from the medicine mistake, and one hospitalist, Dr. Wheeler, refused to consult with an anesthesiologist regarding the best treatment for her to help her get over the mistake with the medicine. Dr. Wheeler told me, “No, because of her age.”

Probate Judge Alan King (Jefferson County, AL) appointed a conservator and a guardian (GAL) for my mother even though I provided documentation that I had not done anything against medical advice.

When Judge King issued an order after a March 20, 2018, hearing, neither my attorney nor I were allowed to receive a copy of the order for several weeks. The clerk at the probate judicial office told me that until the court costs were paid, we were not allowed a copy of the judge's order. DHR was responsible for the bill, so getting a copy of the order was delayed almost a month while everyone waited for DHR to pay the bill.

Judge King also insisted that my mother leave the hospital under hospice care although she has no diagnosis of any terminal illness.

Prior to the hospitalization, she ate a regular diet, got out of bed every day (with the help of regular caregivers), and enjoyed having her hair done.

The Director of Nursing at the current facility told me that she had tried to get Hospice to agree to add a low dose of Zoloft for my mother at bedtime. Hospice told me that they were under strict court orders not to discuss any medication issues with me and refused to add the Zoloft even though she had been taking this medication for over 30 years.

Early on, my brother called the former GAL and told her that no one was able to look after the best interests of my mother any better than I because I knew all of her medical allergies and was extremely careful with her care.

In addition, the court-appointed Jefferson County conservator and St. Vincent's social workers selected a facility in Jefferson County, a three-star facility, that always seems to be short on staff. The court refused to allow my mother to leave Jefferson County (Birmingham area).

The facility in Troy, Alabama, which I presented to hospital social workers as an option, much closer to her home and friends, has a five-star (Medicare rating) and is almost $2000/month less expensive.

Why all this taxpayer money to hold an old woman in “protective custody” and deny her God given rights to choose where she will spend her last days?

Bottom line-we have been through all this before……could some of the problem possibly be the 300 wooded acres in Henry County, Alabama, that my mother inherited from her grandfather during the depression?

In 2013, several south Alabama residents attempted to force a guardianship on her. I published an article about this incident in my blog in late 2013:

Forcing Guardianships on the Elderly: Keeping the Sharks Away–They're Closer Than You Think

Excerpts from the blog:

My mother lives in a small town in southeast Alabama. In February 2013, she hired an attorney to complete an irrevocable trust for her estate, but he never completed the process. He insisted some land needed to be sold first, although he never looked at her bank statements. My mother's monthly income is well above her living expenses. After a couple of months and no land sale, the attorney suggested a guardianship.

We knew nothing of what was in store for our family nor did we have any idea of the stress or the danger our mother would endure because of our naivety.

[Nancy elaborates on manipulative tactics that the attorney and a bookkeeper used to convince her mother that she didn't have enough money to pay her bills. They believe that the bookkeeper was behind what happened next.]

[S]omeone filed for my mother to have a competency testing. With no notice, the owner of the assisted living facility told my mother that she was under a court order to have competency testing with a local doctor. My mother told us later that she had angrily told the doctor, “I know who is behind this.” She answered a few questions and demanded to be taken back to her facility.

Mind-Altering Drugs

A few days later, my son and I were with my mother on an outing. We noticed that mother's speech was slurred. She also had difficulty standing, and her sentences trailed off in mid-sentence. After a quick family conference by phone, everyone suggested that she go home with me for observation. I went into the assisted living facility to pick up a few overnight items as I had many times in the past.

During the conversation [with an employee], I looked over the employee's shoulder and saw the word Oxycontin 10 mg, twice daily and what appeared to be an increased dosage of NORCO. Frightened, I discussed my concerns with my mother and she agreed.

She said, “My head has felt funny, and I didn't know why.” Suddenly, I knew what I had to do….

I drove away from the assisted living facility, [and] I knew I couldn't turn back. I took my mother to a large medical facility out of town for a complete physical and mental evaluation.

The results astounded both of us. [She was fine.] She did not return to the assisted living facility. When she was not back by 9:00 the next morning, the owner of the assisted living went to the sheriff's office and asked them to try to get my mother back. She is grateful to be with family and out of danger.

Signing While Drugged

The Probate Court continues to refuse to give my mother or me copies of the court documents that have been filed. During the weeks that my mother was on the large doses of narcotics, I learned that Lawyer #000 took several papers into her room, which she signed for Lawyer #000, and the assisted living owner witnessed.

When I told my mother about Lawyer #000 and the papers, she was horrified--she remembers nothing of his visit because of the large doses of medicine being given to her.

As for my mother's mental state, she has no difficulty remembering anything except what happened during those days she was taking the large doses of narcotics. A hair analysis confirmed both the NORCO and the Oxycontin.

She has no desire to return to a place she once called home. Her physical strength has returned, and she doesn't speak with slurred speech now. She is enjoying reading a new Danielle Steel novel that I downloaded with Kindle on my laptop.

Read the entire blog entry here.

The article circulated through the Henry County Courthouse and the hearing was cancelled. I also published three other articles about corruption in Alabama, particularly south Alabama. Some of these articles included information about attorneys in the south Alabama area who tried to get my mother to sign her property over to them.

When will it end? My mother has lost almost four months of her life-possibly her last days. Who is behind all this? That's a good question, and one that someone should investigate.

Concern for my Mother's Well-Being

A representative of Southern Care Hospice told me today that they are not allowed to discuss any of my mother's medication issues with me. On the first day with Southern Care Hospice, I gave the hospice nurse practitioner crucial information about my mother's medication issues when he interviewed me.

Somehow the nurses who work with my mother never received that information. And the Director of Nursing at the facility did not get that medical information.

My mother is being treated as though she is not a person--and I am definitely a non-person. In this situation, we have no rights-but no wrong doing has ever been shown.

Who can stop Alabama DHR? If Judge Alan King allows her to leave and go home, that's fine. But these problems should not happen to anyone. How can a person, respected and loved as a teacher in her community, suddenly because she is old, become the pawn of powerful men and women?

How You Can Help #BringMsGregoryHome

Nancy Scott and her mother are frustrated that a court-appointed guardian/conservator is now calling all the shots for Ms. Gregory. Nancy told Health Impact News:

She's got a FAMILY! She doesn't need this.

They understand that she is elderly. Nancy wants her mother to be able to leave Jefferson County and return to a facility closer to her home in southeast Alabama of their choosing, not the state's, where the family can visit and care for the woman who has cared for so many throughout the years.

Nancy fears for her mother's life, as well as for her emotional health, as she is deprived of the love and care of her family:

I don't want my mother to die this way.

Alabama Governor Kay Ivey may be reached at 334-242-7100 or contacted here. She is also on Facebook and Twitter.

Alabama Senate Majority Leader Jabo Waggoner represents the district where Marian (Gregory) Leonard is currently being held against her will in a nursing home. He may be reached at 334-242-7892 or contacted here.

Representative Jack Williams represents the district. He may be reached at 334-242-7779 or contacted here.

Comment on this article at MedicalKidnap.com.

See other articles on elder medical kidnappings covered by Health Impact News:

Medical Murder? Massachusetts Woman Medically Kidnapped from Her Home Dies After Being Denied Medical Intervention

Attorney: Elder “Protective Services” is a Racketeering Enterprise Medically Kidnapping Seniors

Massachusetts Senior Citizen and Attorney Medically Kidnapped – Estate Plundered – Represents National Epidemic

Healthy Boston Woman is Medically Kidnapped and Forced onto Pysch Drugs Resulting in her Death

Public Warning: Boston is a Cesspool of Adult Medical Kidnappings

Adults Medically Kidnapped: 3X More than Children in Foster Care – $50 BILLION in Assets Seized

Attorney Explains how to Protect Against America's Epidemic of Senior Medical Kidnappings

Medical Kidnapping of Seniors: A $273 BILLION Industry

Husband of Retired Missouri Couple Medically Kidnapped – Estate Plundered to Pay for Unwanted Medical Confinement

Adult Medical Kidnapping in New York: 1950s Air Force Veteran Held Hostage in Hospital

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