#I’m running on two hours of sleep from a day ago and coffe doesn’t work on me

[teoandaurelioaregayashell]

[annmarcus63]

He wanted to say "I love you"

Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion

Here's on ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/34237159

Injured Jaskier

"Blessed silence"

"Would you shut up, bard?"

"If you don't stop within the next two minutes, I swear, I'll break that fucking lute and shove it down your throat"

"Jaskier, shut up!"

"Alright! I'll stop, there's no need to be such a brute" replied Jaskier while tucking the lute, currently on his hands, on the brand new case he bought a couple of days ago to a retired musician living his last days on White Orchard. It's gorgeous, orgasmic, almost as sexy as the lute.

The music notes slowly fading in Geralt's ears, leaving a weak hum behind. Geralt sighed relieved, and a suspicious feeling that may resemble guilt. But there's not time to dwell on it. He's trying to sort the potions and required ingredients to complete the contract which he needed to follow up  that same night. Witchers were trained to tune out every sound to be able to concentrate. He could meditate for days with not a single thing to bother him, but Jaskier's chatter is a powerful contrary spell to the calmness he was used to. It's a possibility that Jaskier fell upon his path with the sole purpose to test his limits. He is good company but sometimes Geralt wonders if it's worth the trouble.

He needs Arachnomorphs' venom and Griffin's feathers and blue mutagen to brew the antidote to the potent venom of the Endrega warrior he's goin to face. Methodically he starts with the preparation, grind and mix, smell, taste, it hurts...it's ready.

Three weeks ago he received a letter from Eskel asking to meet for pressing matters. Geralt doesn't know what he may want, it maybe a problem with a powerful beast or just a call to drink, which is unlikely because the message seem urgent. So Geralt had to hurry if he wanted to catch him on time, he was two days late and if he doesn't kill the Endrega he'd be three days late. Traveling with Jaskier prevent from a fastest pace, and the reason of those two days were, of course, the bard who asked him to stay longer on White Orchard to wait for his new lute case. Geralt ponder all this with an edge of bitterness towards Jaskier, it's unfair and uncalled for. He feel like shit. He ponder it still.

Jaskier is capable of recognizing when he's being a nuisance. Or well...he can recognize when someone has reach their limits regarding him. He can be too much, he speaks too much, he moves too much, he whines too much, he thinks too much. He's considerate you see, when Geralt snaps at him he understands. He can't help it. Is what he is, and he's not going to change, he tried once for his father. It didn't work, Jaskier was giving too much away for the acceptance of one person, he conclude it didn't worth it.

He understands really, but today Geralt has been a little over the edge, and has crossed the line between banter and plain rudeness.

So the logical response is to be more annoying.

Jaskier can be awful too when he wants.

He prod the wild and stressed animal with meaningless chatter, why does the fire moves like that? is the color of my fingernail normal? have you ever wonder how it'd be to become a fish?

the wild animal spill one or two drops of the antidote while pouring it from the small wood plate in which the ingredients got blend. Jaskier swear have saw how the vein on Geralt's forehead pop.

Ups…

"Would you SHUT UP for once in your fucking life?” ok he seen that coming “I can't even hear my own thoughts, bard. When we reach Velen you're going to stay there. Do you understand? Not following me around anymore”

To be fair he has caused this. It's what he does, always, being and idiot with and incessant mouth. He has push too far this time, even so that tone on Geralt's voice put him on edge, angry even. That ungrateful witcher and his never ending foul mood. What would he give to see him smile more often?

Everything.

A heavy atmosphere settled on the camp, Geralt's angry and now Jaskier's too, offended to be more accurate. Jaskier hated these often-occurring moments, as if the bard were a stranger and not a years friend.

Are you though?

Whoever sent the letter is Geralt's friend. What give it away? the eagerness to travel fast for instance. Jaskier send a letter once, asking if he wanted to meet at Novigrad, he never received a response nor Geralt went there.

Geralt packed his things, secure the sword straps and with a particular tenseness on his shoulders he turn to Jaskier.

"You're going to stay here. HERE Jaskier. I don't want you anywhere near the nest, the poison..."

"I know"

"Then I want you to repeat it"

"What? Really? I'm not a child, Geralt" but the Witcher kept his stance, waiting, and Jaskier's a sucker for pleasing.

"I'm going to stay here, quiet and still. If I get near the nest there's a high chance to get poisoned, even a small dosis could kill me. And get my body back and bury it would be a big hassle for you Are you happy now?"

"Hmm. I'll be back by midnight"

Geralt disappeared between the trees and Jaskier watch him go with a big lump on his throat. Not five minutes later he started cleaning the broth pot to fill it again with clean water to drink to warm up his bones. How he wish to have tea or coffe to add.

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Wind's howling, Jaskier reflected, feeling the chill colouring his cheeks and breaking his lips unpleasantly. Besides the wolfs living on the wind, there was silence, a sepulchral silence that caused him feel unsafe. Even Roach looks in distress. An hour ago she was lying on the grass getting ready for a good night sleep, and now she's looking everywhere as if she can sense something lurking in the shadows, and that is scary. By the position of the moon Jaskier could guess the time, one and a half hour past midnight. That idiot witcher should be here by now. He knew that, Roach knew that, so why he's not here?

He couldn't think straight, the worry was eating him up from the intestines and it wasn't fair or unnormal, worrying for Geralt is like worrying for the sun to never come up again. It may happen but is unlikely, impossible.

Geralt is fine, he is, or at least is what he kept repeating himself for the past hour like a mantra that no one would ever listen.

Something went wrong, I'm sure. He'd be here by now so why he's not here? What if the Endrega chew his head off? that's sudden and crude Jaskier, what's wrong with you? He can't be dead, I mean I didn't even get the chance to apologize, to clean his wounds, to buy him breakfast, to tell him I love him with all my beating foolish heart.

Agh, but he's not dead, so stop that train of thought right this instant, young man.

For some reason the voice sounded like his dead mother.

"I need to go there only to see if he's safe" said Jaskier to Roach

"But he said rather rudely to you to stay put and not bother him." replied imitating Roach voice like a tired housewife.

"I know what he said" said with an air of petulant child. "And what about you come with me to keep me in check"

"It's dark you can't see and it's dangerous"

"But you can!"

"Fine, hop on me" he loved winning arguments.

He saddled Roach efficiently, Geralt rarely let him do it but he was a quick learner. He put out the fire with a kick of dust, took a small blade that Geralt kept at the bottoms of his bag just in case, he also lit the only torch they carried for emergencies, a beacon of light that Geralt could see if he was in trouble and rode Roach towards the clearing next to the main road from which people get disappearing and getting eaten.

He trusted Roah to guided him, she was a clever one who also worried for her master.

The cold kept biting his skin even under the small fire, he left his cape at camp in case he needed to run, but they're getting closer. A wooden statue with flowers and canisters at it’s feet appear by his right, the notice board said the location of the insect was near that god statue.

He stoped Roach and dismount then he took the short blade wishing he didn't have to use it, before leaving he remembered the possibility of encounter with poison, according to Geralt Endregas not only spit venom but also exuded poisonous gas equally lethal. So he took his undershirt to cover half his face, this might prevent breathing it.

The turned out the torch because the light would attract the Endrega and distract Geralt.

He walked slowly to north realizing how much he was trembling, it wasn't that cold. It was fear and the soft hum of the adrenaline waiting on his brain for being triggered.

And then a rancid and potent smell reached him despite the undershirt. There. A thick unnatural mist and a series of small mountains piled some meters away. No, not mountains, bodies, Endrega bodies lying on the ground slaughtered with efficiency. A witcher’s work.

He almost missed it because of the mist, but there he was, Geralt, lying on the ground in a tragic pantomim of his foes. Jaskier hurried to him almost tripping in the process, he kneel by his side and got shocked by the hardened veins on the witcher's forehead, his levels of toxicity must being dangerous high. But he wasn't dead and if Jaskier wanted to keep him like that he needed to take him away from the mist to help his body fight the secondary effects of the pocions.

He looked the number of bodies surrounded them, more than six when the contract said one Endrega.

He have to be quick so he wrap Geralt by the armpits and with all his strength started to drag him towards Roach, he couldn't risk bringing her here in case of the poison or another insect near by. Geralt was a big guy, he has always being attracted to that, now not so much. Sweating, weary and scared.

Sweating, weary and scared the bard dragged the witcher to Roach when he started to feel dizzy followed by an annoying scratching under the skin. Roach stamped her feet two times before getting closer, she nosed her master while Jaskier catch his breath, then the lovely girl crouched down and wait patiently.

In a matter of a blink, his head started to pound violently and his vision to get blurred. That wasn't good.

The poison, it's the poison.

With all the strength he got left he pull Geralt on his belly over Roach, the position wasn't ideal but it was all he could do before collapsing on his knees.

"Go Roach. Go" She stood with must carefulness, Jaskier watched her go feeling a rush of pride and victory, he saved Geralt, he'll be alright and that was all that matter.

Jaskier fell backwards hitting his head with the ground, his body started convulsing or at least that's what he thought before lose consciousness.

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An insistent poke on his ribs brought him to wakefulness followed by a fall and a sudden sharp pain on his side. A few seconds later the witcher take in his surroundings. Roach neigh by his side, he had fall from her. The heavy cloud from exhaustion and toxicity still rested on his brain.

He felt the bitter tang on the back of his tongue of venom running thru his system and the hollow pain that remained. There were eight Endregas...yes, the Endregas, he had fainted on the clearing knowing well that he might not woke up again if he kept on breathing that mist. How did he get there? Roach answered with a distressed stump of her foot.

"What?" he asked the horse, and she neigh.

Jaskier

"Fuck."

he search on his pouch for White Honey to swallow it in a big gulp.

Awareness returned quickly and despite the injuries and aches on his lef side he took Roach's reins and guided her back to the clearing.

Back to Jaskier, he hoped to not be late, please let him be on time, he begged to no one in particular.

The contract said one Endrega, imagine the surprise and horror he felt when encountering a nest with full grown ups monsters which position were stronger and their hunt abilities an excellency when attacking in pack. He drank the three vials of antidote he carried and a dose of Swallow that burned his stomach and shot the toxicity levels to a mortal point. The Endregas were all dead, but tired and injured he collapse defeated. The position of the moon indicate that was dead for at least two hours during which he continued to breathe the poisonous gas, half and hour more and he'd be dead for good. Jaskier went for him, he could smell him on Roach, his fear and urgency. Idiot, that idiot.

Geralt tried with all his might to not think him dead.

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At the feet of the statue was Jaskier, body bent in an awkward angle. Geralt removed the undershirt on his face, recognizing it as a clever tactic. The mist did not reach that area but the purple and green tone on the bard's skin indicate high levels of poison, he must have went thru the mist to reach Geralt drag him back to Roach.

“Fuck, Jask”  said Geralt with a trembling voice and without thinking carried Jaskier to Roach, there'll be time to check for injuries for now he have to take him back to safety. Jaskier's heartbeat was slow, very very slow. Geralt fret but he did not relent.

He laid Jaskier's frigid body on the bedroll and with Igni he started the fire, he located the water Jaskier used for tea and used to clean his hands of the grime and dirt. A choking noise alerted him and Roach who was nosing the bard.

From Jaskier's nose a dark liquid started to flow, he was drowning from the inside which meant that he had breath the poison and it was filling his lungs with thick mucus.

He put Dandelion on his side and encouraged him to vomit with his fingers to clean his airways as soon as possible. Jaskier throat convulsed on his fingers followed by a steady dark flow. Geralt reached for the pot by the fire to put it under his mouth, which soon was filled to the brim.

"That's it Jask, that's it" Geralt whispered even though the bard couldn't hear him. With a clean cloth, he wiped the bard's mouth once the flow stopped and her lungs sound clear. It was then that Geralt noticed with overwhelming fear that the other had stopped breathing.

"No, no, Jask come on come on"

He acted fast by lifting Jaskier's chin and placing his clasped hands in the center of his chest and began to push down hard more times than he could count.

“Jaskier come back!” he growled when his shoulders felt like jelly, he was getting tired and Jaskier wasn't breathing. He wasn't breathing. He remembered Renfri choking on his arms a reflection of what was happening here. Not this again, not these again. Jaskier's mouth opened follow up by a weak gasp and a weaker heartbeat.

But he came back, and Geralt almost cried right there and there, but he didn't know how. There's nothing else he can do, he had no medicine of herbs for poisoning that could help humans, everything he had was lethal. He instantly regretted overlooking the possibility of this happening. He was traveling with a bard and the most responsible and considerate thing he could do was prevent and buy at least herbs just in case. But he didn't. They were at least a day and a half away from the next town and being that far from the capital meant fewer healers. Jaskier wouldn't survive the travel, not on this conditions.

If the poison hasn't killed him by now then it means that he could survive on his own, or at least that's what Geralt hope.

He put Jaskier in one of his shirts and covered him with all the available clothes they had, his cape and even the blanket with which he covered Roach.

Exhausted he started removing his armour to clean the now faint slashes on his chest and abdomen, then he walked like death to Roach to remove the saddle and pet her gently thanking her for her help.

It was an hour before dawn, but Geralt did not rest, he could not even if he wanted to. He sat next to Jaskier to check his breathing and keep the fire burning.

The fever hit the bard a couple of hours later, he was burning dangerously high, Geralt dipped a cloth on clean water to place on his forehead, from time to time raised Jaskier's head to feed him with water.

His heart didn't stop again which was a blessing amongst the terrible situation. Jaskier didn't deserve to die like this, not for Geralt or monsters.

Then the hallucinations began, feverish and confused, Jaskier babbled under his breath while trembling furiously. He smell like sickness and decay and in that exact moment the witcher missed the natural perfume of the bard's skin. Like sea breeze and orange tree. Like Jaskier.

By day two Geralt got assaulted by an all consuming wave of guilt. He had yelled at the bard for being...well, himself. He was so upset and it was so easy to insult and threaten to leave him in the next town.

Jaskier hated to be left behind.

"Why did you came for me, you idiot?"

"I don't deserve it" whispered before taking the now warm cloth to dip it once again on cold water. Instead of improving, Jaskier's condition began to deteriorate. Painful spasms convulsed his body for hours, the fever did not subside and his breathing were shallow and slow. Geralt lay next to him that night to keep the tremors at bay, he hold him carefully alongside his body.

"You do remember the night after Posada when we make camp and you asked me to cuddle you because you were cold?" He whispered into the night "I didn't. If you were awake I'd never hear the end of this. You'd love it"

The bard moaned softly and shook slightly under his grip. "Come back to me, Jask." He meant to say how sorry he was, he doze off instead.

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First he felt heat on his face, then a relentless pressure on his head as if a heavy stone was on top of it Little by little he maped his body and the multiple aches that alarmed him. On his chest underneath the skin his ribs screamed with fire as if he have been kicked hard multiple times, also his lungs burned like hell, his shoulders were stiff and sore, his belly hurt faintly.

What happened? Where is he? What, what, what, what

"Jaskier Jaskier. I'm here, breathe thru your nose, I'm here." Suddenly he realized that he was sitting up and wide-eyed. It was noon. "Jask" kneeled next to him was Geralt with a worried frown and a canister fill of water. He snatched it from Geralt's hands and drank as if a desert was kept inside his lungs.

"Easy"

“Not…your…horse” Jaskier flinched at how raspy his voice sounded. Beside him, the witcher chuckled and then stretched out his hand to put it on his forehead. Before Jaskier could react at the soft touch tha hand was gone.

"Fevers down" uh, did he sound happy?

"I had fever?" Geralt looked at him with such intensity, a expression he had never seen and therefore didn't know what it meant.

"You almost died" he answered softly. She saw Roach grazing without a mount a few feet away, she also noticed that Geralt was in his small clothes. The camp was a small mess like when they stay on the same place for more than two days.

"The Endrega"

"Endregas, yes"

"I went..."

"Yes"

"I... i'm sorry"

"No, don't be, you saved me" It was a shock when Geralt straightened a lock of hair from her forehead. His fingertips were warm.

"Are you hungry?"

"I don't know. I don't think so"

"You have to eat. I cooked rabbit broth, it'll do you good"

He could only swallow a quarter of the broth before starting to feel nauseous, Geralt said he had vomit enough for the past days before taking the pot from him. Roach came to say hello and Jaskier felt his heart swelled with affection. He wanted to do and ask more, but suddenly he felt tired, very tired, his eyelids fluttered and when Geralt saw him, he helped him lie down and put his cape over him. He was soft and calm, tender even. At that moment Jaskier knew that he must have been in a bad shape if Geralt was acting like this, like Jaskier always imagine on his wildest dreams.

He wanted to said thank you but it felt so meaningless at the moment, Geralt didn't look that good, slump and with drop shoulders a clear sign of exhaustion. if Jaskier still breathed, it was all thanks to Geralt, despite how defeated he was from the contract, he took care of him.

I love you seem something meaningful to say, every feeling and thought Jaskier have had of the witcher, taking form into three little words.

Sleep took him away before he could have the courage to say it.

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The next morning Jaskier insisted he was fine and he wanted to travel to the next town , of course he was a liar Geralt always knew when he lied, because he wrinkled his nose in a cute but irritating way. With a small smile, he pinched the bard's nose back to normal.

“No, you’re not ready” Jaskier let out a laugh as he smack the witcher's hand away. and before Jaskier could protest Geralt added "But we need go there to get you to a healer and reastock"

"Your letter Geralt, don't forget about your letter"

"Uhmm"

Before setting off on the journey, Geralt made sure that Jaskier could endure the journey. He applied what was left of a soothing balm to Jaskier's chest for the pain and bruises that remained after the compressions. Riding would be painful, but they have to get to the healer in case of a relapse or permanent damage. Jaskier let him applied the balm and he couldn't believe the patience and care the witcher put on his motions as if Jaskier could break if enough force was used. He was crumbling in tiny little pieces, melting, but from a different source. The witcher is going to be the end of him one day of these.

I love you, we wanted to said. He put on one of Geralt's shirt instead, it smells like onion and Roach and Geralt and smoke and safety. It smells like home.

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Riding Roach was painful and tiring, walking was out of the question He kept waiting for Geralt to get upset by the multiple stops they made but that never happen, in fact the witcher was the one who plannified and suggest to rest every one or two hours.

Something has changed between them, but the bard does not know what to name this new atmosphere, but he sure welcomes it. For the first time in all the years they have travel together Jaskier felt wanted, cared for, treasured! With a rush of happiness and satisfaction, Jaskier acknowledged that the walls Geralt has built around him to keep him out and stranded, have collapsed. He finally was someone to hold on to. Jaskier was sitting on the bed roll with a warm tea canister on his hands while the witcher set up camp to sleep the night. A day and a half away from the next town has become two days, they'll be reaching the inn (if it were any, Jaskier hope there would be) by night fall.

Geralt was stoking the fire when a mad idea occurred to him, he crawled to Geralt and before he could voiced his displeasure the bard embrace him in a tight hug. Two seconds later, Geralt hugged him back almost urgently, nuzzling his face where Jaskier's shoulder and neck met. He withdrew with a goofy smile on his face and his heart hammering on his bruised ribs, he couldn't care less. But he didn't get any far, he was a selfish man. Geralt was smiling too, a soft and crooked smile, when he straightened the bard's hair over his forehead and ears, he then, like under a spell trace his thumbs over his eyebrows and eyelids. Jaskier could die right here and then from happiness.

Their faces were so close. I love you, Jaskier wanted to say, he took Geralt's hands instead to place a kiss on each dirtied palm.

"You reek" of course Geralt would know how to break the moment.

"You too, mister. For once Roach smells better than us"

“She always smells better tan us” Jaskier snorted getting back to the bedroll pondering on how lucky he was despite the near death experience, he was a lucky men.

By the next afternoon Jaskier was beyond exhausted, every single one of his bones scream with pain, he felt as if he was about to pass out at any moment.

"Geralt..."

"We have to get going, Jaskier, only for a few hours and we'd get there"

"I can't"

"Please, Jask, I'll take care of you when we get there"

Please, what a strange word to express how much you care.

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Geralt practically carried him up the stairs to the room, Jaskier fell face first on the bed already half sleep. Geralt was placing his things when the bard murmured “Wake me up before you go in the morning." The thing is that even if he were on time to reach Eskel, Geralt didn't want to go anywhere.

Jaskier woke up sometime in the night when the mattress sagged next to him.

followed by a strong arm curling around his belly.

"Grlt'?"

"Sleep"

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Jaskier woke up to the chirping of birds on the windowsill, it was still early, the sun was not up yet. Not even the drowsiness could prevent the joy he felt and finding himself tuck to Geralt chest, they're facing each other naturally as if they have sleep like this forever.

And like a bucket of cold water thrown over him he remembered the letter "Geralt" he called softly "Geralt it's morning"

"Hmm, I can see that" came the sloppy reply, but instead of getting up Geral cuddled him more, practically tucking his face against the other's.

as if sensing his distress Geralt added "I'm not going anywhere"

"But your contact..." he withdrew (a few inches) to make a point. Geralt opened his perfect eyes and hold him under them.

"Eskel, my brother. I already send a letter, he'll understand"

"I'm sorry" a kiss was place on his forehead

"Don't be, I want to be here"

"You...you didn't want to" Geralt sighed ashamed

"I know and i'm sorry. Now I know where i belong"

"Here?" replied Jaskier with a snort

"With you"

"With me?!" Now was Geralt's turn to snort happily, resembling Roach when they feed her apples.

"You risked your life even though I was an asshole to you, even when I told you that the poison would kill you if you got anywhere near the place. I...I'm sorry"

"You were an asshole, yes" Geralt gifted him with a smile full of teeth "To be fair i was behaving like a brat at the time"

"You are a brat, yes"

"Hey"

Jaskier wanted to say I love you, instead he kiss Geralt's lips softly.

Geralt wanted to do better, so better he did.

[aliasimagines]

face down // j.t.

warnings: abusive relationship, abuse, beating, strong language

🎶insp.

Jason and Y/N were best friends since day 1. They were always there for each other. Y/N could always run to Jason if she had a problem and he would always come up with a solution (or if words didn't work Jay would beat anyone who made his best friend sad). Jason could always count on Y/N; if he was sad or angry she could always make him feel better, no matter what.

Y/N was there when Jason found his mother; when Bruce took him in, when he became the new Robin. When he died and when he come back to life. Everything that happened to Jason, Y/N knew about it. She knew about the Outlaws, she was even friends with Roy and Kori. Y/N even helped them out a few times during missions, as much as Jason disagreed with the idea of his best friend running around in a supersuit with them. He doesn't want Y/N to get hurt, or worse. He couldn't forgive himself. And he couldn't live without her; without her voice as she comforted him; without her fingers playing with his hair when they were having movie nights or without her beautiful smile... Because, the thing is, that Jason is hopelessly in love with Y/N.

But she had a boyfriend, his name is Zack and as far as Jason knows he made her happy.

And Jay knows Y/N. So when Jason sees her walk towards the table he is sitting at, in front of the café, he instantly knows that something is not right.

It was the middle of summer but Y/N is wearing a long sleeved shirt with a red scarf that Jason got her for last christmas.

"You freezing or what?" Jason heard himself saying before got up to hug the girl.

"Jeez, good morning to you too, Mr. I Wear Leather Jacket and Boots All The Fucking Time." Y/N quietly chuckled as she carefully hugged back the vigilante, trying not to hiss when Jason wrapped his muscular arms around her, touching her hidden bruises. "Can't I wear a nice outfit for once?"

"You always look nice ,princess." 'Beautiful, even' he tought to himself than gestured towards the two iced coffees on the table. "I already ordered us drinks"

"Hmm my favorite! You know me so well Jaybird!" the girl sat down and instantly took a sip of the coffee. "Gosh this has caramel in it?! I love you!"

Jason grabbed his cup too and brought it to his lips. "Yeah, yeah I know you do. But what's up Y/N? I haven't seen you for a whole month!"

"Don't look at me like that! I'm not the one who went away for a top secret mission!" Y/N whisper shouted than continued "But I'm fine... Tell me about the mission!"

Jason raised his eyebrows. She only said 'I'm fine' and then moved on. Something is totally wrong.

"I can't, sorry. It's top secret. Buuut you could tell me what's wrong. Cause something is wrong. I can see"

Y/N opened her mouth than closed it not knowing how to respond. Jason leaned forward and put his large hand on Y/N's.

"You know you can tell me everything, N/N."

"I know Jay....it's just.." she took a deep breath before continuing "I just had a small fight with Zack but that's all."

"What? Why? Are you okay? You can stay at my place if you want."

A nervous laughter left her lips as she shook her head.

"No it's fine. It was just a silly argument. I don't even know why we started it. But don't worry it will be fine, we always make up. I just couldn't really sleep because of it." Y/N lifted her coffe to her mouth again.

"What do you mean by 'we always make up'. Do you fight often?"

"Fuck" Y/N cursed quietly for letting that information slip that she indeed had a few fights in the past. "I.. Yeah. But it's fine. We always make up in a few hours."

Jason couldn't believe his ears. When did this happen? When did Y/N started to hide these kind of things from him?

"For how long?" was the only thing he could say.

Y/N looked at her glass, the table, at her shoes, everywhere except for the beautiful blue eyes of Jason.

"For... A few months." Y/N hoped that Jason wouldn't hear from the noise of the few passing cars but when she saw his face fall, she knew Jason heard her clearly.

She closed her eyes, expecting Jason to shout at her but instead she felt his arms wrapping around her.

"Why didn't you tell me, princess?" Y/N hugged back Jay while fighting the tears in her eyes.

"I... I didn't want to worry you. I thought I could handle it on my own."

"And you could?"

No.

"I..." No. There's no way she will Jason about how Zack... How he hurt her. That would only cause unnecessary problems. "Kinda. I think I need to talk to him but... Yeah. Everything will be fine. I can handle it"

"Are you sure? I can help if you want me to." he smoothed her hair away from her face. Jason wasn't really convinced but he is not going to push her, she doesn't need more stress. Y/N shook her head.

"Thank you Jay but it's better if I do it alone." she finally looked in his eyes. "Seriously Jay. Thank you for being here for me."

"Of course, you do the same for me. Now, do you wanna go somewhere else? To get your mind off of it."

"Yes, that would be nice."

Jason pulled you to your feet and held out his hand for you.

"I know just the place. Please follow me, M'lady." laughing at his adorable attempt of a british accent Y/N linked their arms together and followed him.

(a few hours later)

Y/N pushed the front door open with her free hand. She put down her paperbag full of books and closed the front door. Just when she turned the keys in the lock she heard a voice from behind her.

"Where were you?"

Even though the voice was quite calm and gentle, it took Y/N by surprise making her jump a little.

"Holy shit Zach you scared the living shit out of me!" the girl snaped as she finally turn around to find his boyfriend. The man looked down at his feet, ashamed and clearly feeling guilty.

"I'm sorry baby... What I did last night... I went too far. I know and I want to apologize" he reached out, his eyes finally raised to meer Y/N's, and tried to brush away a lock of hair but she flinched away. Pictures of yesterday popped in to her head and she drew in a sharp breath.

Zack stood above her, shouting about how she was a bitch because of the way she dressed. He went on and on about how a guy was checking her out and how Y/N flirted with him even though she didn't even acknowledged the guy but Zach didn't want to hear about it. He raised his hand and... Y/N shook his head trying to forget it.

"Look Zach I... I really don't want to talk about it."

"It won't happen again baby." he leaned down to kiss the girl but Y/N backed away.

"Yeah. But how many times have you promised?" the words just seemed to slip out on there own against the girl's will. Even though it was a quiet whisper Zach must have heard it cause he tilted his head in curiosity.

"What was that?"

Y/N looked at him with a sudden confidence.

"I... you say that all the time. I'm getting sick of always believing your lies"

Y/N truly believed that Zach was going to hit her so she shut her eyes close. So when she felt his fingers caressing her cheeks she froze on the spot.

"Is that so, princess?" Zach leaned so close that his lips brushed against her  (skin color) skin. His voice sounded so sweet. Too sweet. "You say you're sick of my lies? Hmm? Than tell me where were you baby."

"You know that I was out with Jason"

"Of course I know you were with him but who is he to you?"

"What? I don't..."

"Just answer the damn question!" his mellifluous tone sounding angrier with each sentence.

"He is my best friend, Zack."

"Ahaa!" Zack screamed excitedly making Y/N jump. "There it is! Our first lie."

"I know he is more than that! Hell even that lady tought that he was your boyfriend when we were at the cinema!"

"Only because you were tying your shoelaces and the lady only saw Jason standing next to me! Jesus Zack! This happened months ago, don't start this shit again!"

Zack straight up ignored Y/N and continued.

"And you didn't even try to correct her! You just stood there, laughing nervously, glancing at that bastard. If I wouldn't have been there you would have agreed,wouldn't, you? Maybe even grab his hand, hmm? Lay your head on his shoulder and giggle? Like the little bitch you are... "

" Holly shit, Zack! Do you hear yourself?! Are you insane? I. Have. Never. Cheated. On. You. Can you understand? I fucking loved you! How can even say these things?"

Zack step back a little, so Y/N didn't feel so trapped. She couldn't read anything off of his face. He just stared at her blankly. A few seconds passed like this making a terrible tension, and just when Y/N was about to say something, Zack's quiet voice broke the silence.

"... loved...

        loved?

            LOVED?!" by the end he was shouting at her, screaming like a maniac. "WHAT DO YOU MEAN 'LOVED'?! you don't love me anymore?"

"... How can I, Zack? How can I love you after the things you have done to me? I refused to say this for so long, because I still had some hope... But now I know that you're not the man I fell in love with. Zack. I'm breaking up with you. "

What came after is blurred, Y/N didn't know what happened first. Zack pushing her against the door or him grabbing her by the neck making her gasp out for air in pain.

" You are not breaking up with me" he tossed her on the floor and kicked her toward the couch. "You hear me you bitch? You're not breaking up with me!!" he hovered over her, slowly raising his hand to slap him.

                                                          ~°~

After saying his goodbyes to Y/N, the smile slowly froze off Jason's face. Something's not right. Something's not fucking right.

That's all he could think of as he went up on top of the building. There's more to it.

Thoughts like this crossed his mind as he sat done on the edge of the roof, next to his favorite gargoyle. He reached in his pocked for a box of cigarettes, pulled one out and placed it in his mouth. Looking down at the city, Jason took a drag from his cigarette and slowly exhaled. Looking down he saw cars passing by and tiny silhouettes of humans crossing the road.

He always loved to sit here. Back then when he was younger, when he was Robin, he like to come up because he always felt like he is in control. Like he is on top of everything and noone can tell him what to do. And now he is here because he doesn't know what to do.

Sighing he run his free hand through his hair and then grabbed his phone. Unlocking it he opened the contacts and scrolled down to the letter 'R' and clicked on the name Roy. As the archer picked up, Jason put him on speaker and placed his phone on his thigh.

"Hey man, whats up?" Roy asked holding his phone with his shoulder so he could stir the boiling pasta.

"Hi Roy. I..uhm met Y/N today."

"Uuuu! How is the little N/N?"

Jay shook his head, even though he knew Roy couldn't see him. He quickly exhaled some smoke before speaking.

"Honestly? I don't know."

"What? You always know what's going on with her!"

"I thought so too. But it seems like I was wrong."

"Okay, tell me everything bud. I'm listening." the ginger haired man walked over to the fridge to get some cheese.

"It's about her boyfriend. She said that they are fighting. And she was...so wierd, man. I think she is not telling me everything."

"Well shit. I wasn't expecting that. Hmm... I don't know Jaybird. You 100% sure it her boyfriend? You're not jealous or anything?"

"What!? No! You know that I love her, and all I want is her to be happy but she is not Roy! I'm telling ya, something's fucked up."

"Than I think you should pay her another visit. Just to check everything's cool and maxbe we could all get together for the weekend. Maybe she'll open up if we are all there for her."

"Yeah that's a good idea. I'm gonna check in if she's fine. Thanks, bud!"

" 'f course. Call me if you need me Jay."

" 'kay. Bye!"

Jason hang up and finished his cigarette. He got up and decided that jumping from building to building will be faster that walking to Y/N's apartment. Not that it's that far away but Jay wanted to hurry for some reason.

                                                           ~°~

Just as Zack raised his hand to slap Y/N, the sound of breaking glass rang through their home, making Zack stop and look up in suprise.

"What the fucking hell is...." but he couldn't finish cause a very angry Jason jumped on him causing both of them to end up on the floor. Jason sat on top of Zack as he started to beat him up.

Y/N layed there still scared and shocked, silently crying as she listened to the terrible yet satisfying sound of Jason's fist meeting with Zack's face, over and over again.

Lost track of time, the girl slowly sat up trying to catch her breath. After that she crawled next to Jason and put her hand on his.

"Jay.. Stop. He is not worth it..."

Jason looked at his best friend and he felt his heart skipping a beat as he saw the bruises on her neck which was no longer covered by the scarf, as it fell down as Zack pushed her on the floor.

Jason stood up and grabbed his gun so quickly that Y/N couldn't even process his movements for a second. But when she did, she jumped to her feet too. Jason had the gun aimed at the bastards head but Y/N grabbed his hand.

"No, Jay. Please don't."

"You can't be protecting him after this!"

"I am not protecting him, Jay. But I don't want you to have this on your conscience too. No, the police will take care of him."

"Y/N..."

"Can we leave now? Please?"

Jason's eyes softened as he lowered his gun. He nodded and gestured towards the door. Y/N slowly walked towards it but Jason leaned down and whispered in Zack ear before moving away from his half conscious body.

"You're lucky she is here. Otherwise I would have gutted you. And don't worry, I'll make sure you rot some place terrible. Like... Arkham? A sick bastard like you would fit just right in with the rest of the freaks." he finished his little speech with a good kick in his stomach and ran to catch up with Y/N.

[leahxx129]

The Last Descendant (Sam Winchester x Reader) pt.2

Summary for pt.2: You wake up in an entirely unfamiliar place but soon run into a familiar face. As the days pass, you grow closer to each other but every good thing has to come to an end, right?

Warnings: cursing, careless medication use

Word count: 2.850-ish

Read Part 1 HERE.

You wake up with a headache and an unusually dry throat, but these are minor inconveniences comparing to the fact that the room you’re in strikes you completely unfamiliar. You have no idea where you are. You throw off the covers and try to get up, but a painful throb in your left leg slows you down a bit. You examine the aching limb just to discover an apple-sized deep purple spot on it.

„What the hell happened?” you mutter under your breath. Eventually, you bring yourself to get up and limp over to the bathroom. 

„Well, you look like crap, princess!” you compliment your reflection and decide to wash your face, which, you conclude, doesn’t help at all. 

You find some painkillers in the nightstand drawer and pop a few pills, not caring to read the instructions regarding the dosage first. You find your stuff on a chair in the corner but decide against putting the skintight jeans on. Your leg definitely isn’t in the condiotion to be sexy, so you just slip into your ankle boots that go surprisingly well with the oversized male plaid shirt you’re wearing. Walking gives you a great deal of trouble, but being the stubborn ass person you are, you choose to ignore it and leave the room anyway. The corridor is way too lit and it gives off a hospital vibe, but you can tell this place isn’t one. There is a strange symbol on each door which seems remarkably familiar, but you can’t quite put your finger on it just yet. You wander aimlessly through the corridors that follow each other until you hear a noise coming from a room. When you limp closer and peek in you can see a man standing in what appears to be a kitchen, back turned to you.

„Best defense is a good offense, so here goes nothing…” you think to yourself as you creep up behind him as quietly as possible. You grab a frying pan from a hanger and just as you are about to give it a swing, the man turns around and grabs your wrist.

„Whoa..hey..Y/N!”

You stand there speechless for a second but regain your composure considerably fast.

„Abercrombie?! What are you doing here??”

He rolls his eyes.

„I thought we’ve established it’s Sam and I live here.”

„Then what am I doing here?!”

„Y/N, just calm down, okay? I’ll explain everything-”

„Well, I’m listening!” you cut in nervously.

„Give me the frying pan first, before you hurt anyone!” he commands, and you hand him the kitchen utensil despite your unwillingness. „Great. Now take a seat, I doubt your leg is already as good as new.” he comments, his eyes lingering on the purple spot. „Want some coffee?”

„Sure.” you sit down on the chair closest to you „I drink it with two loads of sugar, sprinkled with a little bit of an explanation.”

He gives you the most authentic bitchface you’ve ever seen in your life as he sits down across to you and hands you your coffe.

„It’s kind of a long story.”

„I’m listening.”

„Well…in a nutshell, you forgot something in the hotel room and when you came back for it, I invited you to have a few drinks as a sign of my gratitude for saving my ass. Then after a few too many we caught up on that kinky wild sex you had joked about before.”

You stare at him doumbfounded, which he finds very entertaining.

„We drank absinthe, didn’t we?” you finally manage to say while running both  hands through your hair „I mean I love that shit, but it can fuck me up real bad.”

Your comment seems to break him, and he starts chuckling.

„What? What’s so funny, Winchester?” it takes a couple of second before it dawns upon you „This didn’t happen, did it?” you ask through gritted teeth.

„Nope. But you should’ve seen your face.” he shoots you a content smile.

„Quit messing with me because bad leg or not, I can still kick your 6”2’ ass.”

„Is that really the way you’d treat someone who saved your life?”

„What do you mean? And I want the truth this time.”

He sighes and his expression turns grim just in a matter of seconds.

„Remember the blonde chick with the vampire you killed?” you nod „Turns out she wan’t a victim you saved from becoming monster snack. She was his mate.”

„Oh, okay. And?”

„And… you could say that she was kind of pissed off that you decapitated her one true love. So, when you took off on your bike and turned on the interstate road, she hit you right in the side with a truck. It’s basically a miracle that you got off with nothing more than a fractured leg bone.”

You gulp your coffee slowly.

„Based on that look on your face, this is not the end of the story, is it?” 

„No.” his voice is barely above a whisper „She then took you to a nearby abandoned warehouse and… and she wanted to turn you. That’s when I arrived. You see, the part of you forgetting something in the hotel room wasn’t entirely a lie. You left your machete there. I went after you immediately, assuming you left the way you did as that’s the only way out of that town. I saw your bike in the bushes and the signs lead to the warehouse…. I was just on time.”

You can feel tear drops forming in the corners of your eyes, so you wipe them off before they have the chance to surfice. The fact that he cared enough to save you stirs up so many unwanted feelings, feelings you thought died a long time ago.

„Thanks.”

„No problem. You did the same for me.”

A long silence falls on the kitchen.

„Y/N?”

„Hmm?”

„When I fought with the vampire, something weird happened.”

„Yeah?”

„Yeah. When I cut her on the arm with your blade, she just… froze. Like… almost as if something was already killing her from the inside.”

You hesitate a little. Should you tell him? After all, he saved you. He deserves to know. Certain parts, at least.

„It was forged with dead man’s blood. Incapacitates those fuckers just long enough for hunters to cut their heads off. Real piece of work, might I add.”

He nods as if he’s confirming a theory.

„One more question… where’d you get it?”

„Every girl’s gotta have her secrets, Sam.” you smirk at him mysteriously.

You steal quick glances at Sam whenever he’s not looking. And when he’s researching, he rarely looks at anything but the lore book. What is it about this man? What is it that makes you sit here and help him instead of running? What happened to staying out of everyone’s business? A few hours ago he told you everything… he’d been drunk the night you met, because his brother’s in trouble and he has no idea how to save him and he just lost it. But the worst part came when he mentioned the Men of Letters and that you’re currently at a safe house of theirs. This only should’ve made you grab your stuff and get gone, but the part involving angels and Michael above all is kind of the main reason for leaving and never looking back. And yet here you are, helping him, convincing yourself it’s because he saved you and your leg still needs time to heal… You shut the book you’ve been reading a little too fast, drawing his attention to yourself.

„If I have to read one more sentence, I swear my eyeballs are gonna start spinning around in their sockets and I’ll see my brain.” you say quickly in your defense, looking as innocent as possible. The right corner of his lips curls into a barely visible smile.

„Go get some shut-eye. You’ve been very helpful, Y/N, thanks.”

„Yeah, I’ve been helpful at finding nothing….” you murmur in response.

„Hey, you went through an entire book in just a span of a few hours! I call that help, even if there is no relevant information in it. Sleep well.”

„Will do.” you force a smile knowing exactly how big of a lie your reply is.

You limp back to the room you woke up in and read the manual on the painkilling drugs.

„Shit!” it’s not strong enough to knock you out for the entire night. „Well then, Sam might crap his pants later this night when the show starts…” you whisper to yourself and take a couple of pills.

The fatigue and the warmth of your blanket soon sends you to sleep. You don’t know how long you usually go without dreams, but at one point they always appear. First, they start off nice, mostly memories of your family. You, your father, mother and brother having a barbecue in the backyard, or just watching TV in the living room, anything basic you enjoyed doing with them. Then there’s a turning point when everything goes to hell. They appear and slaughter your whole family in front of you, one by one. Your father is the last one. He sees you hiding and tries to mouth something to you, but he’s choking on his own blood and you can’t make out anything, at least not until it’s too late. Every scream, every death rattle stops once and for all and that’s when you realize what he was saying. And you do it, regardless that it’s almost no use. You always wake up exactly when this happens, sweaty and screaming, but this time it’s different. There is someone calling your name.

„Y/N, wake up…Jesus, Y/N, wake UP!!” you hear a deep manly voice. Still in the haze of your recurring nightmare, you’re not able to identify who and you do what any person in this line of job would – try to incapacitate the intruder. In a blink of an eye you pull the person onto yourself, then shift so you would be on top and point the gun you got from under your pillow in their face. You’re seeing stars from the pain that shoots through your leg as a result of your swift movements, but you do your best to ignore them and supress the urge of crying out. The only thing disturbing the heavy silence is your panting.

„Sam?!” you finally recognize him.

„Uh, yeah!” his hands are in the air, his gaze is shifting between the gun and your eyes. „I heard this awful screaming coming from your room and I thought something happened…”

You let the gun down and avert your eyes.

„Yeah, not so much. I mean, when people witness this, they freak out, but it’s just another typical night of fucked up sleep for me.”

„You were tossing and flailing and… it honestly sort of looked like you could hurt yourself.” he adds in a low tone.

„Sometimes I do. Sometimes I don’t. It’s fifty-fifty.” you admit, which quite frankly surprises you. You don’t really open up to anyone.

„I see…” his eyes then slowly travel all the way down your body from your face to your thighs as you are still stradling him.

Feeling your cheeks heat up, you slide off him to his right side.

„Sorry about that. And, well, for the whole thing.”

„Oh, don’t be, it was nothing at all. I’ve seen a lot worse actually.” ha pauses for a second, but can’t keep himself from asking „Hey Y/N…Was this…was this about the reason you got into the life?”

„Make a guess.” you respond sarcastically, and he draws his brows together in confusion, awakening some guilt in you. Sam is just trying to be there for you to which your reaction is pushing him away.

„I’m sorry.” you sigh „Yeah. It was about the reason, damn straight. You know how everybody gets into the life by losing someone?” he nods „Well, try losing your whole family at fourteen. Now that can mess your head up real bad. Even though it’s been more than a decade now, my subconscious makes sure I never forget what happened.”

„You know, if you’d like to share-„ he starts but you jump in.

„I appreciate it, Sam, I really do, but I don’t think I can do it.” 

„Of course, it’s fine. „ he gets off the bed and starts towards the door but stops halfway and sits down in a chair. You look at him perplexed.

„Uhm, Sam? What are you doing?”

„Nothing. Just making sure that if you fall asleep, you won’t hurt yourself.”

„By sitting there and watching me sleep like a weird-ass creep?”

„Now that you say it out loud, yes, I admit it sounds way worse than it actually is-”

„Sam, I don’t need a sleeping nanny. I’m a big girl, I can handle a few bruises every now and then.”

„Y/N, please. I’m pretty sure that seeing my naked butt added to your trauma, so please let me do this for you. Let me help you. Or at least let me try.” he pleads. You suddenly realize the weight of his words. He really wants to do this for you and for himself. He couldn’t help his brother, and this chance strikes him as a step on the path of redemption.

„Okay. I hope you don’t snort.”

He smiles at you gratefully. You replicate his expression and turn to the other side and try to fall asleep again. You have no idea how much time has passed but you can’t take it anymore. You sit up abruptly.

„Okay, this isn’t working. I can’t fall asleep knowing that you’re sitting there and staring at me.”

„What? I’m not staring, don’t be ridiculous.” he scoffs.

„You know what? Come here.”

„Beg your pardon?”

„Sit here beside me. Or lay down. Or whatever. This way the whole thing won’t have that creepy stalking vibe.”

„You sure about that?” maybe you’re imagining it, but his voice sounds a bit higher than usual.

„Yup. Although I might kick you a few times, which I apologize for in advance.”

„O-Okay.” 

A couple of second pass when you feel the bed sink in a little bit on your left side.

„We can share my blanket if you’d like.”

„Thanks.” he whispers, and you feel him tug on the fabric.

„Good night, Sam.”

„Good night, Y/N.”

When Sam lays beside you, he makes sure to keep a certain distance between the two of you. But during the night when you wake up, you find yourself a little too close to him. Your head is on his chest, your right arm is around his torso. One of his arms is around you, his lips brush against your forhead. You can feel his hot breath fanning your face. Your very first intinct is to jump out of the bed as far away from him as possible, but somehow you don’t follow it. What the hell’s wrong with you now? Or was something wrong with you earlier when you thought cutting everyone out was the only way? You have no idea. And the fact that Sam’s hold around you tightens does not aid you in finding an answer.

The next morning you prepare breakfast by the time he wakes up. None of you mention the proximity you’ve experienced the previous night. The day goes by with researching. You try to crack a joke occasionally and it appears effective – he rewards them with a smile, even with a laughter once. 

Later on, your attempt at a peaceful slumber is again ruined by your restless subconscious. Sam bursts through the door. This time you don’t pull a gun at him – your shaking hands and tear-blurred eyes wouldn’t even let you - but sternly express your desire for him to leave. Being a Winchester, he does the exact opposite, this time not bothering to keep a distance.  Somehow your figure and his fit perfectly. This goes on for a few days, but you decide to leave. The research isn’t going anywhere, but Sam’s Mom and a friend named Bobby supposedly have a lead on his brother. Plus, you have your own business to run, you can’t keep on playing vacation and miss out on everything.

As a surprise, Sam’s fixed your bike that got trashed in the accident.

„I’m nowhere near my brother, but I did learn from the best.” he says shyly, scratching the back of his ear.

„No, Sam, it’s perfect. Couldn’t have done a better job myself.” you say as you stand on your toes to press a kiss on his cheek. Your lips may linger a little longer than they should. „Thanks. For everything.” you add, your voice scarcely a whisper. He smiles down at you, not saying anything.

You walk to your bike, but before you put your helmet on, the words basically just fall out of your mouth. 

„Hey, don’t be a stranger, Winchester. You should call sometimes.”

[ladywinterwitch]

Run Away ( Six - Endings, Begginings )

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Avenger! Reader

Summary: You and Steve complete each other. Your love is that strong and devoted kind of love that pushes people to things like marriage, making a family. You couldn't imagine that a baby would be something you really wished, until the possibility wasn't your choice anymore.

Warnings: Mentions of smut, swearing, mentions of blood, badly written medical diagnosis, fluff, Nat and Bucky are a mess, mentions of abandonement

Word Count : 6720 

A/n: Chapter six. The big surprise. Nat and Bucky are working things out. That’s it, enjoy. Series Masterlist here. 

                                  (Gif not mine)

-Don't go..- you murmured against your housband's jaw. He sighed while he caressed your naked back.

-I have to, baby. You know how Tony gets when he's left waiting. Also, I think Bucky needs to talk with someone.- he responded and you reluctantly let him go. You sat on the bed, the sheets covering your chest.

-I actually already talked to him. To them both.- you say. He stops for a second.

-You did?- you nod. He sighs.

-I think that they can't go on like this anymore. They have this particular and intense history that will always bring them close, but the way they ere handling things now, or better, how they aren't doing it, it's becoming toxic.- he shakes his head whilist getting dressed.

-I know.- you respond softly. He zips up his suit and you get up from the bed and walk to him with the light sheet wrapped around your figure.

-A little time apart will do them good.- you say, placing your hand on his clothed chest, the other still holding the sheet.

-Maybe for them, but I really wish I didn't had to leave you.- he says lowly with sadness in his voice. You smile sweetly and get on your tiptoes to kiss him.

-I know. But It'll be just a week, right? We've been apart for more than that.- you speak softly while he starts to kiss your neck.

-Don't remind me.- he whispers making you giggle slightly, nudging him away delicately.

-On your way, soldier.- he stands straight and you smirk lovingly. He reciprocates the smirk and gives you one last kiss.

After he leaves you sigh and you sit on the bed with the palm of your hand on your forehead. You're not feeling very well, so you actually consider to stay in bed for a few more hours, considering that you didn't even had the recruits to train.

You open your eyes and as soon as you try to stand up, your head starts to spin a little and the sudden need to throw up invades you. So you quickly go to the bathroom and kneel before the toilet bowl. After a few minutes you finish and come back to the bed, basically falling on it.

-FRIDAY, is Bruce in the building?- you ask, your voice a little muffled by the pillow.

-Dr. Banner is away on a mission with captain Rogers, mr. Stark, sergeant Barnes, miss Maximoff and mr Wilson, mrs. Rogers.- the AI responds and you huff, sitting straght, but still with closed eyes.

-Perfect.- you respond, cringing at the disgusting taste in your mouth.

-Mrs. Rogers, should I call for medical assistance?- you shake your head, then realize that she couldn't see you, so you responded with a 'No, thank you'. You forced yourself to go back to the bathroom again to brush your teeth and the mouthwash.

When you felt better you decided to take a shower. When you were done you stepped out of the box and started to dry yourself up with a towel. You casually glanced at the full lenght mirror and remembered a few nights ago when, while you were just about to make love, Steve told you that it seemed to him that you had gained a few punds. He was joking, but it kind of offended you, so you pushed him off the bed.

You took a looked at the mirror and realized that he wasn't completely wrong; your stomach was still flat, but your belly was indeed a little round. After a few other stares, maybe being your fantasy, but it seemed that your thighs and boobs were a little bigger too. They weren't noticeable changes per se, but they were for someone who knew their own body. You got dressed with your underwear and a pair of leggings, a baby blue long sleeved sport shirt and your short boots. You left your hair down and exited the room to go to the common room.

You felt a bit sad about your latest discovery. After your ‘return’ the team had basically prohibited you to go on the most risky missions. At least for some time. You didn’t really understood why, considering that now you were even stronger that you were before, but Steve especially insisted, forcing you to take a month off missions. So for the past month and a half you had been left behind to train the recruits. Which was basically minimum to none exercise at all. You could see how you could’ve gained a few pounds.

You found it empty, except for Natasha, which was on the phone, leaned near the wall-sized window. When she saw you coming she said goodbye to the person on the other side and hung up.

-Hey.- she said. You gave her an half smile.

-Someone secret?- you ask nudging your head towards her hand. She smirked.

-If you consider Clint a secret, then yes.- you nodded, sitting on the sofa, patting the spot at your side. She walked towards you and sat down.

-How's he?-

-Bored. He adores his family, but he kinda digs the action, you know? If he could put his family in a backpack and bring them on missions, he would.- you laugh.

-Yeah, I can imagine that. But it's right for him to be at home for some time. Laura's life must not be easy. Three kids and a farm to look after, all alone. It's right this way.- you answer. She nods in agreement.

-So, why up so late? Steve left early this morning.-

-Yeah, I know. I may or may not tried to convince him to come back to bed, but he's too honorable for that.- Natasha chuckled.

-Yeah, poor innocent Stevie.- she joked.

-And Buck? You said goodbye too?- you said casually. With the side of your eye you noticed that she stiffened a little.

-Didn't see him this morning.- she stood up, walking towards the kitchen. You followed her.

-Coffe?- she asked and you nodded.

-Did you two actually tried to talk and not to jump at each other’s throats?- she huffed and turned around as soon as the coffe machine began to do his work.

-Straight to the point, I see.- she crossed her arms.

-You argue a lot lately.- your tone was calm. You didn't want to make the impression that you wanted to force her to talk.

-Yeah, I guess we do.- she muttered, turning again to pour the coffe into the mugs.

-It's just..things aren’t working anymore between us. When we saw each other again, after all the years in the red room, it was just like coming back home again, you know?- she paused, looking at the mug between her hands. Meanwhile you went to the counter to add sugar and milk to your coffe.

-We just got together right away. Loving each other, making up for all the lost years.- she smiled a little and you did too. -It had been good for some time, but then something broke. We weren't able to stay together, but in one way or another we ended up in bed. Every argument, every gesture. So we went for a more 'booty call' kinda relationship.- you listened intently.

-Then again, that wasn't enough anymore. He started to do one night stands with diffrent girls, and so did I. Even then we still cared for each other. We were jealous, had this need to be together. It's not healthy, we both know it very well.- she bit the inside of her cheek.

-And now?- you interjected. You wanted to understand exactly where she was at, so you could help her, but it wasn’t always easy with Natasha.. She gazed at you for a split second.

-Now nothing. Literally. We haven't been sleeping together since forever, and in addition to that we almost can't stand each other's presence anymore. If I have to be honest, I'm pretty sure that he has something else on his mind right now.-

-Something?-  you asked, trying not to give away the fact that you already knew it.

-Someone.- she retorted sharply. You were a little taken back from her tone, but you didn’t pay it too much attention. Anyone would’ve been a little angry about something like that.

-I was going to break up with him anyway. For good. I love him, I mean, I would probably jump in front of a train for him, but I don't feel the same way anymore. And he doesn't either, so it's better like that. I wouldn't want to ruin the last few pieces of our relationship that are left.- She turned again with her usual smirk, even if a bit more bitter than usual. You can’t help to smile a little, because they’re more alike than they think. And you silently thanked God for that. It means that they will go through it, if not well, at least in agreement.

-Now you want to tell me why you were up late or not?- you did a gesture with your hand as if to brush away the question.

-I took my time to get up, and to get a shower.- you answered, putting the empty mug in the sink.

-What about we go out for lunch? I'm already starving.- she huffed a laugh.

-Yeah, well, hear me out. First thing first, it's barely eleven in the morning. And second, if we go out, you'll have to try to not order the whole restaurant.- your mouth dropped open while she laughed.

-You bitch! Are you and Steve in some kind of agreement? I get it, I eat a little more than usual lately, but there's no need to be asses about it.- you crossed your arms, a little defensive.

-I'm joking, hun. But lately you're eating a lot more than 'a little bit'. And what about Steve now?- you both started to walk out of the kitchen.

-Yeah, whatever. A few days ago we were kinda in the middle of something, and completely out of the blue he goes 'It's my impression or do you look a little round, darlin’?'- you mocked his deep voice and Nat widened his eyes, trying not to laugh.

-And instead of responding, I straight up pushed him off the damn bed.- she let out a loud laugh.

-What happened then?-

-In the end he apologized, saying that it wouln't matter for him anyway, as he should. But I didn't give up, and turned my back to him. I mean, you just called me fat while we were about to fuck and you think you can get away with it? Absolutely not.- she continued to laugh while you went down to the gym.

-

You and Nat joined Thor and Vision on the gym for a few hours, then went out for dinner instead of lunch. The morning after you got sick again and you cursed the poor sushi chef. You actually got a rough night, so you didn't pay too much attention to the sickness. It was always hard when Steve went away on missions. You missed him at your side and you always got worried.

Nonetheless, you faced the toilet again first thing in the morning. At that point you asked FRIDAY to search for an efficent stomach antibiotic. She found the best one and you went to a pharmacy to buy it. And you sure hoped that it was the best, because damn, it was expensive.

The prescription said to take two pills every day, before lunch and dinner, for at least a week. You did it, but for the next three days you didn't feel better and people started to ask about your delays, or why you just avoided every type of scent from the kitchen. It was so wired. You threw up your entire soul on the morning, but at night you ate basically everything that was on sight.

Also, the medicine leaflet said that if taken at the right hours, the relief shoud've been noticed already the day after, two maximum. But you didn't feel better, at all.

You started to wonder if maybe you didn't had a food poisoning. You didn't really knew what to do, and also the team would've been back in two days, so you tought that the best thing woul've been waiting for Bruce.

And so the days passed, the team came back in the middle of the night and you, into a deep slumber, didn't even notice when Steve snuggled in bed with you after taking a shower. You woke up feeling hot, and when you tried to move the sheets, you realized that you coudn't even move your arm. You widened your eyes in panic and sighed with relief when you looked down at the naked arm embracing you. You smiled and turned to face him. He was still sleeping.

'Poor baby, he must've been so tired', she tought. You started to caress his beard, a new look that you enjoyed very much. His eyelids fluttered open slowly and he gave her a sleepy smile that mirrored yours.

-Hey handsome.- you whispered.

-Hey beautiful.- he responded, with his morning voice. You liked that very much, too. But on the other hand, you loved the entirety of him.

He leaned onwards to give her a kiss. She accepted gladly, and a few moments later, he was above her, trailing his hand on her side, the other on her cheek, his elbow the only thing that kept him up. But just when the kiss deepened, she moved from under him and got up, running to the bathroom.

-I know that it's morning, but am I really that bad?- he joked, a little confused. His attitude changed when he heard you coughing. He got up, in his joggers and a short sleeved t-shirt, and went to the bathroom. You was kneeled in front of the toilet, coughing and throwing up.

-Hey, hey, baby. Take it easy, honey. What's happening?- he asked softly with worry in his voice. He goton his knees near you on the floor, and took your hair gently into a makeshift ponytail. With the other hand placed on you back, soothing and caressing up and down.

After a few minutes you finished and he helped you stand up, while flushing the bowl. You reassured him and quickly washed your mouth. Steve picked you up bridal style and brought you to the bed, not listening to you saying that you were fine, 'cause clearly you weren't.

-Do I need to take a basin? Water?- he asked caressing the hair near the forehead.

-I'm fine, Steve. I just need a minute.- you said weakly.

-Why are you sick anyway?- he asked. You sighed and shook your head slightly.

-Don't know, I think I caught food poisoning of some sort. Been going on like this for some days, but I'm on antibiotic so.- you answered.

-Why didn't you call me?- you smiled a little, rasing your hand to reach his cheek.

-Love, you were on a mission. Plus, I'm not dying, okay? It's just some disgusting food. Don't worry.- he shook his head, careful not to make her move her hand from his beard covered cheek.

-You should've called me anyway. I always want to know if something's wrong okay? After wha happened three months ago..I- you sushed him, pulling on his neck to bring him to you. You hugged tightly.

-I'm fine, Steve. Really. If it’ll make you feel better, I'll go get checked by Bruce okay? Oh yeah by the way, did everything went well? Everyone's okay?- he nodded.

-Yes, and yes to the second one. Please, I would be more reassured if you did.-

-

You asked FRIDAY to inform Bruce that you needed to see him and he gave you appointment a few hours later, after luch. The lunch that you hadn't been able to eat, to be precise. Steve had gone to talk to Fury about the mission, so you went alone. Before you went into the lab, you saw a glimpse of Nat and Bucky going down the elevator. You really hoped that they could find some peace.

You knocked even if the door was open, just to annouce yourself. Bruce was sitting at one of the desks, with a fuming mug in hand. He turned around and smiled at you whe he saw you.

-Hey. Come in.- you closed the door and went for a hug.

-How was the mission?- you asked, sitting next to him. He was wearing glasses and his curly black hair were a little more rebellious than usual.

-Smooth. Almost boring. Didn't even got beat up.- he joked making you chuckle.

-That's good.- he gave you a lopsided smile.

-What about you? I walked into Steve a couple hours ago and he asked me to check on you.- you nodded, sighing.

-I told him that I can handle it, but he made me promise to get visited, so here I am.- he rose and eyebrow, expectantly.

-It's been like, a week of throwing up. Few problems with my stomach, but none with the sleeping, let me tell you. Hadn't slept this good in months.- you emphasized the last words.

-Sure that that's not your husband's fault?- you jaw dropped at the tease and you smacked his arm slightly.

-Bruce Banner!- you exclaimed laughing. He laughed too, before focusing again.

-Well, it's not normal to be thowing up every day. What do you think it is?-

-Food poisoning, probably. Or maybe a bad stomach bug that got worse eating sushi.- you shrugged. He nodded thinking, and you added -I began to take an antibiotic anyway.-

-Since when did you began to take it?-

-Like, five days ago.- his brows furruwed and he got up, gowing towards one of the glass lockers. You saw that he took out a syringe and a test tube.

-As I already said, it's not normal. The antibiotic should have immediate effect, or at least you shouldn't be throwing up anymore. I'm gonna take a few drops of blood for a test, and in a couple of hours we'll know what's wrong.- he explained calmly. You nodded.

You rolled up your sweater's sleeve, and Bruce took just about the half of the syringe, then he applied a band aid and told you to come back in three hours. You thanked him and went to do your usual training with the recruits.

-

You just finished your turn five hours later and went straight to Bruce's lab. You were a little late, but you couldn't just leave the recruits in the middle of the training class.

You knocked and he opened the door letting you in. You saluted Tony who was busy with some files.

-Okay, I have been a little busy, so we’ll look at them together now.- he says absently while searching for the results on the laptop.

-Here it is.- he mutters narrowing his eyes in concentration. You were looking at Tony working while waiting, and saying that you jumped to the roof when the sudden noise of ceramic breaking reached your ears would be an understatement. Both you and Stark turned around to see what happened, and saw Bruce with a hand on his mouth and the coffe mug on the floor, in pieces.

-Bruce are you all right?- you ask with worry.

-Fucking hell Banner, lucky you that that damned coffe wasn't near any electronic devices.- he rolled his eyes calling for FRIDAY and asking to one of the maids to come and clean.

-Bruce?- you repeated again. He let himself fall on the chair, looking at you.

-You're pregnant Y/n. The blood test says that there's nothing wrong, except that you're pregnant.- you don't say nothing. Tony freezes, dropping his own mug. You're so shocked that you don't even flinch.

After a few seconds l Bruce calls for you tentatively, and you suddenly start to giggle, then laugh histerically.

-Oh God, I almost belived you almost got me for a second.- you say trying to catch your breath, but your smile died as soon as you saw that neither Bruce nor Tony were laughing. Iron man had went to the laptop, looking by himself.

-Y/n, it's true.- he said. Your breath was stuck in your throat and you felt like the roof was crumbling on you.

-H-how...It's not possible.. I- I can't..- Bruce came quickly to you placing a soothing hand on your shoulder.

-Y/N, look at me. Can you breathe for me? Just like that. Good.- he repeated while you breathed deeply.

-But didn't she had some sort of genetical condition?- Tony asked, confused. Someone knocked and an old lady dressed as a maid came in, with a mop to clean.

-Okay, uhm. I'll stay here, you go on lab 3 and do some check-up alright?- Stark said. You and Bruce moved to the next room and he closed the door, immediatly asking you to take off the swater for the ecography. You did and layed on the couch. He put gel on your stomach and started to examin you.

-Shit. You see that?- he says lowly pointing at a tiny thing, very similiar to a bean. You start to feel your eyes burning from the upcoming tears.

-That's my baby?- you ask almost naively. He smiles and nods.

-With what I can see, you're at least two and a half months pregnant. And not to be mean, but you kind of put on a little belly already.- you were in between laughing and burning him with your gaze. But in that moment all that you could do was look at the screen.

-But how is that possible?- you finally gazed at Bruce.

-Well, actually if you look to it, your uterus seems to appear different from the last time we did this. My theory is, when Steve and Bucky gave you their blood, with the super soldier serum, they kind of healed you. You are stronger, faster, you eat more because your metabolism requires so. Your sight is perfect, as well as your hearing and your reflexes. So it's not impossible that your uterus...healed too. I also forgot to mention that the blood test came back 100 % infected by the serum, like I had predicted.- you were speechless.

-Just think about Steve. Before the serum he was a lot shorter, had lungs problems, asthma, genetic conditions, was very thin and in poor health. If you think about it, it's not that impossible.- he said excitedly by his own realization.

-Oh my god.- you breathed. You stopped a few seconds to think about it, then a thought came to you and you expressed it to him.

-It worked on Steve. Why didn’t it heal Bucky?- you frowned, speaking softly. A sad expression appeared on the doctor’s face.

-Y/n, growing a whole new limb is not the same as correct a small internal malformation, nor like curing asthma. Bucky already had some super soldier serum in him before he fell from the train. And, even if miraculusly the serum could’ve actually been capable of healing him, he didn’t have enough in his system then. Also, Hydra gave him that metal arm. Even if it wanted to, the skin would’ve had an obstacle. It’s awful, but unfortunately it’s not the same.- hearing all over again what Bucky had been through made your stomach clench, and for once the blame wasn’t your baby’s.

Your baby. It sounded so wired and impossible to you. You were in seventh heaven, but you also couldn’t help but think about all the process, the time and the progress you went through to accept that the possibility of having a child wasn’t possible to you. And instead, here you were, pregnant and healthy, a baby growing inside you.

You thanked Bruce, hugged him and then practically run towards the elevator, but when it opened, you saw on one side Natasha and on the other Bucky. They both had the same mixture of anger and sadness in their eyes. Nat had glossy eyes and Bucky was chewing on his lower lip.

You were a little taken back when you saw them, and you honestly wanted to disappear, because you were so happy, while they were so broken. Bucky's face lit up and his crossed arms untangled, almost by surprise. Nat saw his reaction and looked at the source, and when she did, oh boy, you think you never saw her like that. She just straight walked past you towards the stairs. Bucky stopped the doors from closing and you stepped in timidly, pushing the button to the gym’s floor.

You finally looked up at him and he gave you the shadow of a smile. You did too.

-Are you okay?- you said softly. He took a deep breath, nodding.

-I am now. I said what I had to say, even if she didn't took it that well.- he bit his lip nervously.

-Oh, Buck.- you whispered, latching your arms around his torso. He didn't expect it so he didn't reciprocate right away, but then he circled you with his arms and melted into the embrace. The little moment was broken by the doors opening. You both let go, Bucky more hesitantly.

-If you need to talk, you can come to me. Or Steve. You know that.- you say to him with one hand on his cheek and the other blocking the floor. He was looking at you with such affection that almost made you want to hug him again until he was smiling again. But you couldn't. Not right now.

-I love you.- he said. You felt a strange sensation in your stomach, but you brushed it off. You took off the hand from his cheek and smiled at him sweetly.

-I love you, too Bucky. You know it. Maybe we can catch up when you're feeling to? Right now I have to get to Steve.- there was almost a sense of guilt in your words. He nodded and took a step back in the elevator.

-Of course you do. See you later, don't worry.- he gave you a small lopsided smile before the doors closed. You let out a sigh and got yourself together before reaching the running space, where you knew that he would’ve been. As expected, he was standing in a side of the gym, arms crossed in his training black suit, watching the trainees sparring in partners.

You walked towards him, he was giving you his back, focused on the training. But suddenly a very small boy stopped the match and stood straight doing the military salute, getting punched by his female parter which was as confused as Steve. So he turned to see what he was looking at and when he saw you he grinned.

-Tamara, bring him to the infirmary.- he ordered.

-Yes captain.- she said, taking the small boy's arm around her shoulders. When they walked past you, you stopped them.

-Hey, what's your name?- you asked smiling at him, his eye already starting to water. He looked starstruck when you talked to him.

-Benjamin, ma'am. Benjamin Bates.- he tried to do the salute again, but you delicately stopped his hand.

-Hello, Benjamin. Now, I appreciate the respect, trust me, it's really important. But your training and your well being,- you nudged at his eye, -Is more important. Next time try to be more careful, okay?- he was so flushed that he seemed ready to burst. He nodded.

-Thankyou ma'am.- you nod your head a bit and they moved on. Meanwhile a few of the trainees had stopped to look at the scene. Steve noticed and shouted at them to take a five minute run. No one had the courage to protest and with 'aye captain' they did as told.

You giggled and Steve smiled shaking his head, leading you to the office.

-So, to what do I owe this very well appreciated visit, mrs. Rogers?- he flirted, leaning back on the desk, beefy arms crossed and a smirk palying on his lips. You smirked too, getting close to him.

-What? You already forgot about the visit that you imposed me, captain?- you faked offense and he nodded, actually remembering it.

-How could I. So, what did Banner say? A big bad fish hurt my lovely wife?- you chuckled and placed a hand on his broad chest, he was grinning widely at you.

-You're in a good mood uh?- you teased. He suddenly gipped your sides bringing you attached to him, your faces a few inches.

-I always am when I am with you.- he said lowly, making you blush, looking down with a stupid smile on your face.

-So, Banner?- he insisted and you cleared your throat, recomposing yourself.

-Uh, yeah. I'm okay. No poisoning, no big bad fish.- he nods.

-That's great. But then why are you being sick?- he asked. An idea shoot though your mind, and you stepped away, deciding to play with him a little. You started to walk around the room casually, looking at photos, documents without particualr attention while talking.

-Oh, well, it's actually your fault.- you shrugged and he almost chocked on his saliva.

-What?- he blurted out.

-Yeah. He said that it's your fault, because you had...too much fun.- this time he stood straight, uncomfortable and quite flustered.

-Oh god. Oh...uhm..Have..Have I been to rough? Is that it? Oh baby I'm so sorry I- you brust out laughing, confusing him even more. You tried to keep yourself from laughing by biting your bottom lip. You walked towards him and saw that he was looking at you with puppy eyes.

-You're a silly man, aren't you?- you said lovingly, while latching your arms around his neck.

-But, Y/n..It's because of that? Please tell me. I don't understand.- he shakes his head.

-I said that you had too much fun, not that you hurt me. You would never do that, I know it honey. But you know, I think we should learn how to be a little quieter in future, to not disturb our new neighbour.- you said dead serious. He looked at you even more confused, trying to process the phrase.

-New neighbour? Be quiet? We have a floor just for us, who should...-then he stopped mid sentence. He narrowed his eyes.

-Are-are you saying what I think you're saying?- he asked with a little hope in eyes.

-I don't know. All I know is that if you don't learn real quick to change diapers, I'll be the one to kick your ass. Then you'll know how your trainees- he interrupted you with a kiss. He then grabbed your waist, raising you slightly from the ground, making you spin a little. You let out a muffled scream and started to giggle.

-Feel like.-you finished the phrase smiling while he looked at you with happy tears threathenig to spill from his blue eyes.

-Y-You're pregnant? How is- Are you- he continued to interrupt himself and you chucked again, placing your hands on his cheeks.

-Yes, I am pregnant. I am certain, and to anwers the 'how'..-your gaze softened.

-Is thanks to you. And Bucky.- he understood right awa, and brough a hand to cover his mouth.

-Just like..me. It healed you like it healed me.- you nodded and you almost could feel your own tears coming out.

-I'm going to be a dad.- he said, more to himself as a realization than to you, but you smiled and answered anyway.

-Yes, baby. And you're going to be the best dad in the world.- you gave him a peck on the lips, and in that exact moment you were interrupted by a trainee with short breath.

-Cap-captain Rogers, we did ten minutes and- Steve couldn't stop a stupid smile on his face.

-Yeah, rest of the day off.-

-Oh! Thanks sir. Thankyou. Mrs. Rogers.- he nodded at you and you gave him an half smile.

-

You and Steve were so happy, that you coulnd't wait to tell the team about the baby, so after dinner you and Steve stood up and everyone looked at you.

-Uhm, so. We have something to annouce.- you said, a little embarassed by having all eyes on you.

-You're moving out?- Wanda said with worry.

-No.- you responded.

-You're getting a divorce?- Sam tried and everyone threw daggers at him with their eyes. He put his hand in the air in mocking defeat.

-Just guessing.- he defended himself.

-No.- Steve responded to his question firmly.

-Then..?- Thor engaged you. You and your husband smiled at each other and then he wrapped his arm around your waist.

-We're having a baby.- he stated. The table fell silent, except for Tony and Bruce who rose up quickly to hug you, even if they already knew.

-Wait, what?- Sam widened his eyes.

-You're pregnant? For real?- Wanda said excitedly stepping up. You nodded as you parted from Bruce and went to hug her.

-Yes.- you responded sheepishly.

-Three months ago, when Y/n almost left us, Bucky and I gave her blood, as you know. And you also know that since then she acquired the super soldier abilities, what we didn't know, was that this change also 'healed' her entire body. And here we are.- Steve explained smiling at his best friend, whose on his behalf, wasn't smiling at all. He looked quite shocked actually, but then seemed to wake up from his thoughts and stood to go hug Steve.

-Congratulations punk.- he said parting quickly.

-It's thanks to you too, Buck. We wouldn't have this opportunity if it wasn't also for you. Hell, she probably wouln't even be here.- the blonde said with gratitude. Bucky was getting umcomfortable for some reason.

-Don't even mention it.- he responded in the end. Then Steve turned to hug Thor and Sam, and Bucky looked at the woman he loved. There, he said it.

He was in love with Y/n, and it was a damn mess. She turned to him and excused herself from Vision and Wanda.

-Hey.- he reciprocated your smile.

-Congrats.- he pulls you in an embrace, nuzzling his nose in your soft hair. You close your eyes and clasp your arms behind his torso.

-Thankyou. For everything.-

-It's nothing, doll.- he shrugs. You part from him just enough to look at him in the eyes.

-It's not nothing. Your friendship, your support, your kindness. This.- she lookes down for a split second, -It's also thanks to you. So just accept the gratitude and shut up.- you smile and he chuckles.

-Alright, alright.- he nods and they break the embrace, much to Bucky's discontent. Y/n looks around for a moment.

-Where's Nat?- she asks to no one in particular. Steve walks to her side.

-She said that she's waiting for you on the balcony.- he responds calmly, but with a strange sadness in his voice. You frown but just nod and go towards the open area. You close the glass door behind you and you see her sitting on the swing seat.

She gives you a lopsided smile when she sees you approach and you reciprocate. You sit next to her.

-Well, I guess I should make my congratulations to the new mom-to-be.- you huff a little laugh and shake your head.

-I still can't believe it.-

-I'm really happy for you two. You deserve it.- she says.

-I'm just...All that pain. Was actually useless.-

-No. Pain is always a way to become stronger, to grow. Also, before, you actually couldn't have kids. You couldn't know what would happen. You didn't know that there could be a possibility. The important thing is that you accepted it and you didn't let the sadness put you down.- you gave her a half smile, grateful for that pep talk. There was a pause, then the redhead spoke again.

-I'm going away. For a while, at least.- your head snapped quickly towards her.

-What? When? Why?- she looked down sighing.

-I leave tomorrow. I actually asked Fury for an undercover mission, and he assigned me one. I need some time by myself, Y/n. I need to clear my mind and stay away for a while.- she explained, trying not to hurt you.

-But..Nat I need you. It's selfish as hell, I know, but I wish that you’d stay.- you said, -But I understand. If that's what's best for you, then...it's what's best for you.- you cringed at your own words, feeling too upset to actually form a sentence with a logic sense. She chuckled a bit and took your hand.

-Thanks. But I promise that I'll be back for when the baby's born. I couldn't miss Steve's panic.- you both laughed.

-You better be.- you teased.

-Don't worry honey. There'll be plenty of people here for you. I assure you that.- she spoke the last words with a bitterness that you didn't quite understand, but you decided to not ask. Instead, you hugged her.

-Take care of yourself. And try to call once in a while-

-I'll try.-

-

Nat left just after your conversation, entrusting you with the job of telling the others where she was. You felt sad at her departing, but you pushed that thought aside, thinking that it was the best thing for her right now. You were left alone in the balcony, just enjoying the fresh air of the night.

-Here all alone, doll?- you opened your eyes slowly as a smirk creeped on your face. You turned to the voice, not really surprised. You had enhanced hearing now after all.

-Just enjoying a little peace.- you respond to the tall dark haired man in front of you. You leaned against the metal bar, your body open to him. He had his arms crossed and a lopsided smile graced his handsome features.

-Fair enough. You won't be having any of that in a few months.- you sighed and he chuckled. He noticed that you started to involuntarily stroke your arms, so he got closer and wrapped himself around you.

You grinned at him and hugged him back. The two of you kept staring at the stunning view of New York's lights.

-I'm really happy for you, you know that right? Both of you. No one deserves this more than you do. You'll be a wonderful mom.- you gnaw on your bottom lip delicately, trying not to cry. You gaze up at him and smile.

-You think so?- 

-Obviously. I’m sure of it. Because you know what it means to grow without a family and you’re a good person. You’ll know what to do. And Stevie too. He’s a punk, but he’s one of the best people I’ve ever met.- you chuckle slightly. 

-You know about Nat, don’t you?- you said more like a statement than a question. He nods and speaks after a few seconds.

-Yeah. She told me this morning.- 

-So you finally talked?- he nods again. Rubbing his hand on your arm to warm you up.

-Yes. Turns out we were more on the same page than I thought.- his voice was calm.

-That’s good.- you didn’t mention your conversation with her. They talked, it was over and you shouldn’t interfere anyway. 

-Mmh.- he hummed in agreement. - We said that we were sorry, that we care for each other but it’s best if we end it, and we did. Then she asked me if I had someone else. I told her that I had someone in my mind, but I wasn’t with them. She got a little mad because she felt betrayed. I respect that, so I apologized and wished her the best. I asked if we could stay friends, but she said that she needed some time first.- you placed a hand on his chest to soothe him.

-Bucky, I’m with Nat for the friends part. You have a lot of baggage by yourselves and a history together. I know that you probably think you’re okay with being just friends, but you both need time apart. You can’t end something like that and pretend it didn’t happen.- your voice went form calm to a bit more firm tone, -I’m fucking upset that she’s going away on her own okay? But I understand where her mind is and I think this time will do her good. And you should try to move on, in an healthy way, too. Maybe try something with whoever’s on you mind, mh?- you part from him with the intention to go back inside and give him a smirk while saying the last phrase. 

He doesn’t laugh or smile at first, and you think that maybe you went too far, but then he steps closer and places a hand on the back of your head, kissing softly your forehead before stepping back again. 

-Thanks for the talk. Now, we should go back inside. It’s getting late, you’re cold and Steve would kill me if I let you freeze out here.- his sweet tone reassures you a bit and with his words you step inside, your body instantly warming up.

You turn around and Bucky’s already gone. Your heart drops slightly. He’s clearly not okay now, but he will be. Two warm hands lay on your shoulders startling you a bit.

-Hey, it’s just me.- Steve chuckles and kisses your cheek.

-Can we go to bed? I think I really need a good ass nap.- he laughs again and nods, interwining your hand and leading you towards the elevator. You both quickly wave at the remaining members of the team and head up for your floor.

Quite some news in this chapter, uh? Don’t worry, it’s not gonna be all fluff and unicorns for long, not to spoil or anythin’ ;) 

If you liked it and you care about the story continuing, I ask you to leave a feedback to let me know, if not, it’s okay :)

Taglist: @polarcrystall​   @a--1--1--3​   @silver-winter-wolf​

[jojuarez26]

We found love in a hopeless place

It's been such an incredibly long day. I just want to go home and soak in the jet tub with my bottle of whiskey and a pack of smokes.

I had to spend five hours in Erudite today. I fucking hate Erudite, I left for a reason. Unfortunately being former Erudite and having the superior intellectual intelligence out us five Dauntless leader's, I tend to get stuck attending all the seminars.

When I get back Max has left a fuckton of paperwork on my desk and two disciplinary action. Not to mention the extra two hours spent working on a personal investigation.

Chip, a fence guard I completed initiation with, came to me two months ago with something he had heard out on a recent two month tour. If any of it was true it would be fucking life altering for me.

As I stalk towards the Chasm heading home I see a blur of black with long burnette hair drop over the railing.

Fuck! I burst forward looking over the edge. I expected to be looking for a body. What I saw surprised me.

She was hanging on by her finger tips looking down. The internal struggle clearly displayed in her emerald eyes. Quietly and careful not to startle her I crouch down to get closer.

"Hey there. Give me your hand," I say quiet and calm reaching out for her

Those polished emerald eyes lock with mine and go wide. She struggles to move away without falling.

"Go away!! Leave me alone! I can't do it anymore!" She yells panicking.

"Ok, ok relax. Whatever it is we can figure it out. Let me pull you up," I coax calm but stern.

"There is nothing to figure out. It hurts to much. Leave me be," tears are now streaming down her face. Despair and hopelessness on full display on her face.

Think Eric, think.

"This is a pretty permanent solution you can't take back. Let me help you up. Let's talk about it." I desperately want to get her from dangling over the edge.

"I can't. I don't know how. I don't want to do this alone anymore," she is clearly hurting inside.

A unusual emotions of empathy and sorrow wash over me. I suddenly have the desire to hold her and tell her it will all be alright.

"Sweetheart, please let me help you. Whatever you're going threw I won't leave you alone in it. I promise," the words slip out before I can even register what I just said.

She hesitates a moment longer before giving in and reaching for my hand. Quickly before she has a chance to change her mind, I grab her and haul her over the railing. She crumples into a sobbing heap in my arms.

"I'm Eric if you didn't already know. What's your name sweetheart," I ask trying to calm her down while texting the infirmary.

I'm sitting on the floor holding her in my lap stroking her hair while she continues to sob uncontrollably.

"S-Sam. Samantha is my name," she works on blurting out

"Well Samantha, we're going to get you to the infirmary and get you checked out ok."

Her heart is racing, whole body trembling and her pupils are diolated. Her glazed over, feral look leads me to believe she is on a drug of some sort.

"Don't leave me alone Eric. You promised." She whispers as she begins to calm down a little bit.

Shit. Me and my damn mouth. I am, if nothing else, a man of my word. A fucking asshole prick, but a noble one.

"Yes Samantha. I am going with you."

I finally see the infirmary team heading towards us. Two females crouch down coaxing Samantha out of my arms to check her over. As I stand, Samantha thrashes wildly grabbing for my pant leg.

"Don't leave me! You promised!" She shrieks wildly.

"Hey, hey. Shhh. I'm not leaving you Sam. I did promise. But I need you to do something for me. Let these two nice ladies look you over while I talk to Dr.Marx a minute ok. Can you do that for me Sam."

I took her face in my hands talking to her softly. She looks into my eyes intently. I almost feel naked for a second. Like she is stripping away my layers and staring into my soul. After a moment with no loss of eye contact and final content she believes me she sits down. I run a hand gently threw her hair and use the other to stroke her cheek.

"Thank you. I will be right here. I promised."

I turn to see the doctor and two nurses staring at me wide eyed and curious. Quickly I school my feature and narrow my eyes with clear disdain. Quickly the snap out of it and get to work on Samantha.

When I turn to Dr. Marx I give him a death glare. He just smiles, an amused look on his face.

"So the evil, ruthless,asshole leader does have a soul after all," he says quietly, merriment in his voice.

"Tell anyone and you'll be hanging over the Chasm next," I grumble giving the doctor a pointed look.

"Your secret is safe witb me. Besides, nobody would ever believe me anyways," he chuckled.

"So how do you know our Sammy girl here and how did you find her?" The doctor inquiries.

"I don't. I was on my way home and I seen jump over the rail. When I got to her she turned histarical and spouted off about how she couldn't take it anymore."

She must have a history if the doctor knows her. Great. What did I just get myself into. I'm starting to regret my promise.

Dr. Marx gets a sympathetic look in his eyes. He flicks his gaze to the girl with compassion and sadness in his eyes.

"Sam has been a frequent flier in the psychward since she joined us three years ago from Candor. She has had a rough life that nobody deserves," the sadness with a hint of anger laces his voice heavily.

"However I'm impressed. I honestly can't believe she let you touch het let alone threw herself in your arms."

I narrow my eyes at him. I have a feeling I am not going to like what I hear. I nod at him to go on.

"Samantha has been violently and repeatedly abused physically, mentally and sexually by those she should have been able to trust the most. General she doesn't let men, especially essential strangers, get near her. She a strict female staff contact order in her Dauntless file."

I feel the blood begin to boil in my veins. I have a sudden memory of training her. I remember an instances when Four went to correct her stances. She freaked the fuck out and had to be sedated. Max pulled her from training for three days. She returned with strict orders that she was only to face female opponents in training and to get Lauren if anything one on one was required of her. An explanation was never given. I'm snapped back into the present by Dr.Marx calling my name. I shake my head and return my focus back to him

"I'm sorry what was it you just said?" Annoyance clear in my voice.

The doctor just smirked and repeated himself.

"She has a history of drug and alcohol abuse. A strike on her records from secondary school for several minor assault charges. We're ready to take her now. Are you coming?"

I give the good doctor a glare that usually sends even the strongest and bravest of Dauntless running in fear. Not the doctor, he just rolls his eyes

"Did you not hear the part where I promised to go with her. Besides, I would like to sit down and see what action plan we can get in place for her for permanent ungoing therapy."

Dr. Marx expression was one of surprise and being caught off guard for a split second. But then just as quickly he schooled his features to a neutral look before speaking

"That is very kind of you Eric. I don't think anyone has ever kept that type of promise to the poor girl. She could use any bit of support she can get."

I felt a tightening in my chest. I usually never let anyone get close to me or I to them. Ever. I did that once and my trust was betrayed. I prefer to be alone with minimal non-proffesional interactions. I only do casual sex and I am an asshole.

However something about Samantha has me drawn to her. Plus still a noble asshole. Some Erudite traits where just impossible to break even after five years in Dauntless.

I nod my head for the doctor to go. I turn back to Sam who's eyes are still locked on me. They have her on a stretcher. I walk over to walk beside her as we head to the infirmary. I was caught off guard when she grabbed my hand in a death grip.

I turned surprised eyes to hers and my breathing faulted for the briefest of seconds. Never in my life had anyone looked at me with so much trust, gratitude and some other emotion I couldn't quite pinpoint. Ever.

Most people looked at me with fear or contempt. Occasionally respect and way too many times pure lust.

Something inside me I couldn't identify with stirred my emotions. I reached my other hand out and gently stroked her cheek. Her eyes slipped shut as she leaned into my touch. The tiniest of a tingle shot threw my hand.

"We're going to get you better Samantha. You will never have to deal with it alone again."

Tears of relief filled her eyes. She has such beautiful eyes when they weren't filled with so much pain.

"Thank you," she whispered giving my hand the smallest of squeezes before those beautiful emerald eyes slipped shut.

Two hours later I sat nodding out off and on in the recliner I pulled next to Sam's bed. They had drawn blood, hooked her up to an IV and various other machines to check her vitals. I stepped out of the room while a nurse helped her change into a gown.

I had also went and got coffe while Dr.Marx and Sam disgust what she would allow for disclosure to me and how much power I would be granted in her decision making. She had no family here in Dauntless.

Her mother passed away when she was five. A younger deceased sister. Both her father and her older brother where incarcerated indefinitely in Candor for crimes that where sealed to the public because they where committed against minors.

Sam had been placed to live with in Aunt in Erudite for the last six months before her choosing ceremony.

"Eric. Eric wake up. The notary is here. Let's get this paperwork signed and you can be on your way."

I rubbed the sleep from my eyes and glanced over at Sam. She was sedated and being given meds to detox off of some drug or another she had been taking. She looked peaceful, looks can be deceiving. I was being given partial patient history disclosure and full power of attorney whenever a doctor deemed her fit for decision making.

"Why on earth give a complete stranger this much power and leverage over yourself?" I had asked.

"Because in all her twenty-one years that stranger is the only person who showed initiative to give a damn abour her. Plus it doesn't hurt your a leader and all."

I had scoffed and reminded him what a dick I am and that people usually loath me.

"That's because people never get to see the side of Eric we did tonight. I think you hide behind your authority to hide your own demons."

I glared at the doctor for a moment before looking away.

"Carful doctor, don't forget who the patient is," I sneered.

He had just sighed shaking his head. I had known Dr.Marx since I was a child. He had been a friend and colleague of my father before he passed away.

"Alright Eric. Everything is in order for now. Go home and get some sleep. Should I tell Samantha if and when you will be back?"

"I'll be back to have dinner with her. Call me if I am needed before then."

I stretched and turned to leave. I paused looking at the broken girl lieing on the bed. What the fuck had I just gotten myself into? I bent over and placed a kiss on her forehead and turned to go.

"Eric," I stopped and turned to look at Dr. Marx.

"You are a good man you know. Your father would be proud. Also call your mother once in awhile you little shit."

My lips turned up slightly at the last comment. Of course my mother would use Elvin as her messenger.

"I will. When I have something to say."

With that I left to head home for some sleep. As I walked uncertainty started to slowly creep into my thoughts.

I just completely let a stranger in just to save her life. From what I had gathered she had a fucked up childhood and just couldn't seen to cope as an adult. Besides my leadership duties I just made the biggest and second commitment of my life. Did I just change my life for the better or make the biggest, foolish mistake of my life?

@pathybo @tigpooh67 @iammarylastar @kenzieam @lunaschild2016 @emmysrandomthoughts @clublulu333 @beautifulramblingbrains @frecklefaceb @sparklemichele @mom2reesie @ericdauntless @dani5102 @readsalot73 @kiiiimberlyriiiicker1995 @bookwarm85 @glamlover87 @badassbaker @captstefanbrandt @jaihardy @ariwolff14

Divergent fanfiction: Eric/OC

I do not own any part of Divergent

Strong language and mature content