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365days365movies · 4 years

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February 24, 2021: Annie Hall (1977) (Part 1)

Well...Woody Allen.

I, uh...OK, look, I could get into the whole Woody Allen thing, but INSTEAD of me doing that, I’ll just say this: look into it. Because there is a LOT on this subject, and it’s controversial as HELL. At the end of the day, I’ll recommend this upcoming series on HBO, and just recommend that you look into it.

Because, uh...yeah, it’s not great. That’s all I’m gonna say, because I need to educate myself on it more as well. Instead, let’s talk for a few seconds about divorcing the art from the artist. But ONLY for a few seconds.

I understand why some of you might be surprised I’m doing this one. Because, again...Woody Allen. But, yeah, I always try to do my best to divorce the art from the artist. Because some people suck, but they still make nice things, or at the very least, things that should be open to interpretation and appreciation.

“Superfreak” is a classic song of 1981, and everybody’s heard at least some of it, but Rick James fuckin’ kidnapped two women and kept them in his basement, WHERE HE TORTURED THEM. Edgar Degas made beautiful paintings of ballet dancers, and was also A MASSIVE ANTI-SEMITE. And before he was (RIGHTFULLY AND JUSTIFIABLY) outed as a roofie-ing piece-o-shit...I grew up with - and genuinely enjoyed - this guy’s comedy.

And you can judge me for this, but...I still think his stand-up was and is genuinely funny, and I still appreciate the cultural impact that The Cosby Show had on society’s perception of African-American families, divorced from the stereotype of the ghetto. Fact of the matter is, works themselves deserve to be separated from the artist who made them. That’s my philosophy, and I’m sticking with it Entirely fine to disagree with me, by the way, I get it.

But in that spirit, I’m watching Annie Hall, despite its creators likely transgressions. After all, this is technically his magnum opus, and it’s a good look into the man himself. And so, with that in mind: Annie Hall! SPOILERS AHEAD!!!

Recap (1/2)

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Alvy Singer (Woody Allen) is talking directly to us about his outlook on life, and his view on the potential future. He tells half of a joke, then an amusing anecdote, and a bit more until telling us that he’s broke up with Annie, and he’s still thinking about it, trying to figure out exactly where things went wrong. He goes back to the beginning, which is punctuated with flashbacks.

He grew up in Brooklyn in World War II, and a young Alvy (Jonathan Munk) is with his mother (Joan Newman) at the doctor’s. He’s depressed after learning that the universe will one day end after a period of expansion, and is having his first real existential crisis. I had mine around the same age, actually, went I learned that the Earth will one day get swallowed by the sun. And THEN came the realization that I’d be dead by that point. AND THEN came the realization that I’d die one day, and that was a WHOLE NEW crisis to...anyway.

He grew up under the Coney Island rollercoaster according to him (although his analyst says that he exaggerates), and that’s what he blames for his “nervous personality. He’s also got an active imagination, often blurring fantasy and reality. His Dad ran the bumper cars on Coney Island (a place that I’ve never been, but desperately want to go).

He continues on talking about his former schoolmates, and not really that well. While in class, young Alvy kisses a...little girl...ahem. And then, when reprimanded by the teacher, current Alvy notes that he was always...like that...and he also says this to the little girl, and they talk about Freud’s latency period, and Alvy said he never...had...one...that’s uh...that’s fuckin’ SOMETHING, now isn’t it?

OK, well, shoving that forcefully aside as hard as I can, Alvy wonders aloud on where his classmates now, and one of them says this:

This also involves a little girl saying she’s “into leather,” which is...awkward as FUCK, but WE’RE GONNA MOVE THE FUCK ON. Alvy recounts his paranoia, and was so even after he became a famous comedian (which we say after a VERY good joke about qualifying for the army as a hostage). He speaks to a friend, Rob (Tony Roberts) about potential anti-Semitism from a person in a passersby meeting, then heads to meet Annie.

Annie Hall (Diane Keaton) arrives at a movie theater, late and in a bad mood. The two are late to their intended film, argue briefly, then head to another film that they’ve already seen, The Sorrow and the Pity. In line, they’re in front of a man loudly soliloquizing on film, much to Alvy’s annoyance.

Annie and Alvy continue to argue a bit, while Alvy openly berates the casual film critic. In the middle, he talks to the audience about it, only to be followed by the crtiic himself, who also acknowledges the audience! Huh! Anyway, he’s a professor at Columbia, and starts continuing his line speech, this time on the work of Marshall McLuhan, one of the most important early media theorists ever. And then, Alvy brings out Marshall McLuhan (Marshall McLuhan) to debate him on it, only for Alvy to turn to the audience and wish aloud that life could really be like this!

I’m beginning to understand why people like this film. It’s metacontextual before metacontextuality was really a thing in film. It’s a fourth-wall breaking movie in some fantastic ways. But will it still hold its muster after breaking the fourth wall’s become so commonplace? we’ll see, I guess.

After a showing of the film, the two return home, and Alvy tries to initiate sex. But Annie’s not really into it at the moment, and Alvy complains that they used to have sex all the time, and it’s been a while since. So, I guess that retroactively awkward scene at the school was meant to foreshadow Alvy’s high libido, that will probably cause some conflict in the film. Anyway, Annie notes that Alvy once went through something similar with Allison, his first wife. Who’s Allison? Flashback!

Allison Portchnik (Carol Kane) is a graduate student in political science, working for a campaign that Alvy’s about to perform for. He’s nervous, as he’s going on after another comedian. She comforts him by saying that she thought he was cute, and he does well. But we flash-forward to a night after they’re married, shortly after the death of JFK, which Alvy’s obsessing over, entertaining various conspiracy theories.

However, Allison rightly points out that his obsession is simply a way for him to avoid having sex with her, which mirrors the present-day situation him him and Annie. Flash forward TO Alvy and Annie, and there are just lobsters...everywhere, on the floor in their kitchen. After that commotion, they talk about Annie’s past romances.

And by talk about, I mean they LITERALLY WALK THROUGH her memories. And I gotta say...I fuckin’ love this method of storytelling. One of her previous boyfriends is an actor (John Glover), and his over-dramatic prose sickens Alvy. We see a second marriage of Alvy’s to New Yorker writer Robin (Janet Margolin), who’s dragged him to a stuffy high society party of intellectuals that he has no interest in going to. Same her, Alvy. I bet the caviar’s canned.

He tries to initiate sex with her - in the middle of the party, mind you - and she turns him down. later, when they get to it in their apartment, she’s unable to, uh...reach satisfaction. From there, we flash-forward after that marriage ends to a tennis match with Rob, where he meets one of his mutual friends: Annie Hall.

And for the record, Annie’s pretty obviously got a crush on him, and she’s adorable as fuck. Also, that outfit, real talk...that outfit rules. She offers to give Alvy a list, during which he’s quite worried about her driving, but the two still get along well enough. Annie’s an amateur photographer, during a time period where photography is considered a relatively new art form. The two go to her apartment, and share familial anecdotes and personal stories about themselves. And as they talk, we also see a set of subtitles on top of each of them that betray their inner feelings and thoughts.

I do genuinely like the stylings of the movie, goddamn. This conversation leads to Alvy asking her out on a date, although they end up scheduling it after Annie auditions at a nightclub as a singer. And while it doesn’t go great, Alvy tells her she was fantastic, and they share a kiss before they head to dinner. They head to her place afterwards, and we cut to later that night, post-coitus.

And then, we get a flash-forward back to the next day, where the two are at a bookstore, and Alvy speaks on his personal philosophy of life.

I'm obsessed with uh, with death, I think. Big - big subject with me, yeah. I have a very pessimistic view of life. You should know this about me if we're gonna go out. You know, I - I feel that life is - is divided up into the horrible and the miserable. Those are the two categories, you know. The - the horrible would be like, um, I don't know, terminal cases, you know, and blind people, crippled. I don't know how they get through life. It's amazing to me. You know, and the miserable is everyone else. That's - that's - so - so - when you go through life - you should be thankful that you're miserable because you're very lucky to be miserable.

Iiiiinteresting.

Shortly into their relationship, they admit they’re in love (or “lurve”, as Alvy says). She moves in with Alvy, which he initially isn’t the biggest fan of, having been burned in two previous marriages And already, their relationship is showing a few bumps. Alvy’s also always trying to push her to take college classes, while she uses mariuana whenever they have sex, which Alvy doesn’t agree with.

But as they have sex one night, without the marijuana at Alvy’s urging, Annie’s mind wanders - LITERALLY.

This film...this film has a VERY unique style of visual storytelling, and I am HERE for it! Seriously, I genuinely love this method of storytelling and comedy, it’s extremely engaging to me.

Soon enough, Alvy gets an interview to write for a talk show host, which he ABSOLUTELY despises. But in doing so, he decides to go into stand-up for himself, and is actually quite successful at it! But before we get to that, we’re at the halfway point! See you in Part 2!

#annie hall #woody allen #diane keaton #tony roberts #carol kane #paul simon #shelley duvall #christopher walken #romance february #romance movie #romcom #romantic comedy #user365 #365 movie challenge #365 movies 365 days #365 Days 365 Movies #365 movies a year

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motsimages · 3 years

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A list of Hollywood things that may be what real life is in the US and the equivalent situation in Spain. Feel free to add your own country. I’d love to know of other places :)

This is going to be long, so the TL:DR is there are many things I know about the US because of the movies, landscapes, hobbies, cultural things, everyday life things and sometimes they feel very normal or like something that happens in movies, no in between. They are neither and this is a list of differences I can think of in regards to Spain.

Click there to find out, there are pictures and all.

- Going to school by car, by bike or in a yellow bus: We either walk or your parents drive you (specially when you are too young to go by bus on your own or your parents are overprotective). Not really bike because bike lanes are a mess (in that they don’t exist) in Spain, it is dangerous. There are school buses if students come from places that are further but they’re average travel buses and once you are 16, you cannot use them. You have to go to school from 16 to 18 in public transportation because school is not mandatory after 16, it is understood it’s your choice. You may have a motorbike at 16 but I don’t know anybody who went to school in it. All of this is extra -fun- if you live in a village as in there may not be any bus service if it’s a small place or you live far apart from the village.

The picture is an average school bus with a woman in charge of picking up children. It looks like it’s in the country or maybe, the outside neighbourhoods of a city.

- Dating: we don’t date. If you like someone, you find a way to hang out with them and hope for the best. It may be more or less clear what is going on but it’s not a date, just a plan. You go to a restaurant/movies/theater... when you _are_ in a relationship or with friends. Not a date. The confusing hell it is to watch people saying things like “It’s a date! I’ll pick you up at 8!” Ok. Maybe they pick you up but still not a date. Also: not a problem if you have sex straight away or if you don’t feel like it (because there is no social obligation around it, no date). It seems to be a big deal when you are 30 and “never been in a date” but the first time I was in a date was with my current boyfriend _after_we started going out (I was 30 btw). I met him on a dating app, btw. Still don’t consider the first time we met “a date”. “Going on a date” maybe a thing but still probably based on movies.

- Prom: very confusing. Specially the part where you _have_ to have a _date_ (again, not something we do ever). If we do a ball (IF, also it wouldn’t be a “ball” as such but a “party”), it is actually expected to go on your own, with your friends. It would be a massive social pressure to go with the boy you like (with whom nothing happened prior to this) in front of people. Nah, you either go with your partner that you already have or with mates. But generally speaking, there is no “prom” or “graduation” in high school. In my high school, we spoke with a restaurant to have dinner, invited the teachers we liked and after that, went to local bars to party until the next morning when we went to see what grades we had received for the year. It was done like this so those who failed the exams could still party with the rest.

As for uni, maybe some other colleges do something but we didn’t (mainly because I studied translation and half of the people in my year were abroad that year). I don’t even have a picture of my graduation. People usually dress smart and then wear a band with the colour of their faculty.

The picture is graduation from Tourism (if I’m not mistaken). It shows a group of girls on a scene, all of them smartly dresses with an orange band on their shoulders. Their classmates are sitting on the grades of this “theater thing”, all wearing the same band.

- High School: in general, it’s very confusing. It seems to me like there is some kind of obsession with high school years given all the movies about high school and all the “childhood sweetheart” stories out there. For us, it is quite an irrelevant period of our lives, almost like school. You do it because you have to but often, life (and interesting things) happen AFTER high school. Our high schools don’t have lockers, you just carry 5 books in a backpack. But you have your class, only a couple of things take place in other rooms (maybe Science in the lab, or some optional subjects). Public schools close once the classes are over and all the activities you may want to do, you do them somewhere else (paying for them, most of the time). There are no School teams of anything, you don’t play against other schools either (maybe private schools do, I don’t know). In my high school, I remember for Spring we organised like a week of activities and you would sign up with your mates if anything. You and 2 others would make a basketball team to play in the Basketball league against other people in your class but it isn’t “The Official Team”. I remember there was a card tournament for the game of Mus (typical from Madrid). Also, we don’t have The Popular, The Band Kid, The Nerds, etc. clearly separated. There is bullying (but our toilets are not full of water so you cannot drown there) but either you are normal or you are the weird kid, so to say. I was a weird kid who suffered some light bullying and then I went to average, with no bullying. Overall, everyone speaks with each other and unless it’s a severe case of bullying (which there are), there are no underdogs or closed groups. We don’t have yearbooks AT ALL and this “Clown of the class” thing? I personally find it borderline problematic.

Picture of an average high school in Spain. It’s separated in two halfs. On the left, there is a couple of people carrying backpacks in a corridor. It’s quite dark, a window at the end giving light to the corridor. On the right, one of the doors of the corridor is open and shows a classroom. There are lots of green tables and chairs, all of them in pairs. At the end there is a blackboard. The light comes from the window.

- Alcohol consumption and other drugs: We can drink at 18 and it’s not a big deal if you get drunk. By the time you’re 18, your parents have seen you drunk more than once. You may have gotten drunk with your parents. You’ve seen them drunk more than once. Spain is quite an alcoholic society, tbh. BUT we do not like aggressive drunkards or dependant drunkards. You can get drunk but you have to be able to still be nice. Your friends will stop hanging out with you if you get drunk too often, too heavy or too badly (and you will find those who follow you, obvs). We do it to socialize and have fun, not to knock out. Weed is partially legal (I don’t really know the law, you can get fined for carrying but not arrested, you can buy paraphernalia in shops, there are cannabis clubs, people can smoke on the street in the open, you can grow it at home, it can be used for medical purposes or recreational). Other drugs are illegal though personal use may be allowed? I don’t know but I do know that it’s relatively easy and cheap to find other harder drugs, and so, they are commonly used at parties. The 80s were a complicated time in Spain because the heroine consumption was over the roof. It killed many many people in that generation.

- Houses: in cities, it’s more frequent for people to live in a flat. Depending on the time when this flat was built, the quality of the materials will be better, the flat will be bigger or smaller. Houses are something you see mainly in villages and they tend to be next to each other, no garden (maybe a patio). In the last 20-30 years, people started to show an interest in something that looks like “suburbs” from the movies (even though “suburbio” in Spanish actually means the full opposite of “suburbs”) but it doesn’t fit the weather nor the way we live and I personally hate them. And wooden houses are out of this world, everything here is made of stone or brick. Traditional houses here are made of stone with thick walls (up to one meter of thickness). I attach pictures of houses in the North of Spain. Southern houses are full white, no wooden structures to be seen from the outside.

A village in what looks like the North of Spain. There is a lot of vegetation, you can see some white and brown houses in a grass field. There is a tower at the back. We see a town square with houses made of stone, red roof and wooden balconies. Most of the walls are painted white, some aren’t and you can see the stone itself.

- Physical contact: in the movies, people rarely hug. It seems to me that maybe in the 80s-90s people hugged, touched more on screen. At some point in the 2000s it stopped and now you have people crying their eyes out and their best friend just standing there. We stand closer to each other and touch each other to show care, interest and affection very often. Some people in Spain are not very tactile (and thus, really like Northern Europe) but generally speaking, if someone cries, you hug them (unless you know they don’t want it, in which case you stay nearby). Heterosexual men also hug and also hold each other by the shoulder, for instance. I know this is a shock for some foreigners (don’t know if in the US it would be). From the times I’ve met US people, they’re not only surprised but sometimes actually scared that people touch them. Not even Asians react the way US people do to physical contact in Spain. BTW, when I say “touch”, I mean “the arm, shoulder” mainly. Other places require closer levels of friendship. However, you may kiss your partner/lover anywhere in the street, it’s ok, usually goes unnoticed by people. Even my parents grab each others asses occasionally in the street.

This picture is from La Torre de Suso, where 4 friends gather after 10 years of being apart because an old friend died. It also touches on drug addiction and the 80s. It shows 4 men in their 40s wearing a jacket and a tie, smartly dress, smiling and about to hug each other in the middle of the street of what looks like a small town.

- Welcoming someone to the neighbourhood: apparently, people bring cakes to the new comers. We don’t, you’ll eventually meet your neighbours. Or not. But you have to say hello to the people you see on the stairs of your flat, in the street you live. In small towns/villages, you have to greet everyone you know, at least say “hi”, ideally actually stop for small talk (I’m terrible at this but getting better now that I live in a small town).

- Church: it seems to be a big part of people’s lives. Very often, people are going to church, all ceremonies seem to be religious (marriage, death...) and they tend to be Christian (sometimes Jewish but they seem to be less involved in their religious life?, or maybe the movie is done by non-religious people?). In Spain, everything is Catholic and at the same time, it isn’t. Many traditions are Catholic and people enjoy them but they aren’t Catholic themselves. There are churchgoers, of course. There are Catholic cults with massive power in politics and society (Opus Dei, mainly). But we had a fascist Catholic dictatorship and many people got very tired of it. To give you an idea of how things usually go: everyone in my village eats the same meal (fish and garbanzo beans for lunch, potato omelette for diner) on Good Friday (even my family, where nobody has ever been religious willingly). Only old people and some very Catholic families go to church. Most holidays are related to Catholic Saints (this gives us lots of long weekends and days off during the year) and they are often celebrated with a town fair that lasts several days.

In theory, Spain has no religion. In reality, it is Catholicism. In schools/high schools there is a subject called “Religion” and almost always it’s about Catholicism (teachers of this subject, even in public schools, are related to the Church somehow). It is not mandatory but often there is no alternative if you don’t want to take it (I was the only child who didn’t attend and had my own homework during that time that my mother chose for me: Ethics).

The image is from El Rocío, an important religious fair that takes place in the South of Spain. Many local fairs look similar to this. Lots of people are gathered in a small temporary white hut, decorated with garlands (white and red) and the flag of Andalusia that is green and white. There is a bar with small glasses of white wine and some plates with food on them.

This said, it’s very frequent to get married at the Town Hall with a couple of witness and it’s also very frequent for burials to happen in the Tanatorio, where people can say goodbye to their loved one but it’s not in church.

And even many church goers are not devoted Christians, are open minded about LGBT issues or other, for instance.

- Prison: We don’t have death penalty but people can spend their life in prison if their crimes are massive and they add years and years to their sentence. Prisons here are public and as far as I’ve seen in Spanish movies, there are no uniforms, you wear your everyday clothes. You will only go to prison if you committed a serious crime or if you have several small crimes. Often, the first time it’s a reduced sentence that can be made into paying a fine. The second time you will go to prison. This happens even for domestic violence/rape which usually causes great controversy in society. You can leave earlier if you behave well (very earlier actually) and sometimes you can leave the weekend and the come back to prison, or leave for x hours and come back to sleep. It depends on the sentence and behaviour, etc. I’d say terrorism is the hardest charge and right now, they are using terrorism as an excuse to sentence activists (there quite a lot of political prisoners in Spain).

I mention crimes because you have to have LOTS of other offences to go to prison. They usually are just fined.

The picture is from the movie Cell 211 which is an excellent movie. Do watch it. It shows the main character, a bold man with a goatie wearing a sweater whose sleeves have been cut off. He looks serious. On the background, many men wearing everyday sports clothes cheer and look in the same direction as him.

- Laws: I don’t know Spanish law very well (it bothers me to say that I may know better what to do with the police in the US than in Spain) but it seems to me, from the movies, that many things are made into a massive deal in the US. Like jaywalking is apparently an offence of some kind? Here you can just cross the street wherever. People respect the crossing path for safety but it’s not a crime to not do it. People also don’t sue companies or other people as often and it’s usually not that big of a deal maybe? In any case, it’s a completely different legal system.

. The 50s: The 50s in the US are fancy and colourful. Society seems to have been thriving, everything was getting better. In Spain, the hunger years were starting to be over but many people were poor. We were in the worst of the Franco dictatorship, it was quite a rural society that had been destroyed by a civil war (the effects of which are still being felt). Rich people were fascist, poor people could be anything (many were actually communists, republican or other leftist). This is not a happy time in Spain. Many people had left to be refugees in other countries, many were leaving illegally to work in Germany or France. The music we listened to at the time was definitely not Elvis Presley (look for Lola Flores or Miguel de Molina, even though he ended up fleeing the country because he was openly gay and republican and they almost killed him once).

This image is from the movie Los Santos Inocentes, based on a book of the same title. A classic of Spanish modern literature and cinema. This is the way most people looked in the 50s in Spain. Even now old people look like this in villages.

It is like a family picture in front of a white house. Everyone is wearing black, dark blue, dark green or grey. From left to right, there is a boy sitting on a bench that is situated next to the door. Next, it’s a young girl wearing a long grey skirt and a dark green jacket. By the door, the mother holds a very thin boy who seems to be either deeply sick or dead. She wears mostly black and gray. The boy has the brightest green in the scene. Next to her, there is a man wearing a gray jacket and a bonet and finally, there is an older man that seems to be smiling (the only one smiling, everyone else has a serious and gloomy face).

And that’s what I can think of right now.

#hollywood #cultural differences #life in Spain #Spain #comparing movies #us life #spanish life

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yossariandawn · 4 years

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Tagged by @astarkey and @alwaysupatnight , thank you! I do love interesting questions! I’m combining these because it would take me days to think up 22 questions. Here are the rules:

Rule 1: post the rules Rule 2: answer the questions the person who tagged you asked and write 11 new ones Rule 3: tag 11 people and link them to the post Rule 4: actually tell them you tagged them

Edit: I didn’t realize how long this got, so I’m fixing it so I can put some of it behind a cut. My questions first so people can decide if they want to play along!

My Questions:

1. Set two fictional couples you love on a double date, and tell me how would that play out? One word answers are acceptable if you prefer.

2. Do you like candles? If so, what’s your favorite candle scent?

3. What’s the perfect fic you’ve been craving that wish someone else would write already?

4. If you could have an 15 minute conversation with any fictional character, who would you choose?

5. Above question continued, what would you talk about?

6. What’s one weird thing you loved as a child?

7. Any songs that make you always think of a character?

8. How well can you swim, and do you enjoy swimming?

9. Recommend me a new show, movie, or song!

10. What’s your favorite food that you make?

11. Draft the perfect Zombie Apocalypse Survival Team, 5 characters from any show or movie.

and now I’m tagging @sandalaris, @fortysevenswrites, @starkidmack, @captain-k-jones, and if you follow me and want to be tagged in this kind of thing in the future, just tag yourself and I’ll know to send them your way! I never know who wants to play, and there’s never any pressure to do any I send, I promise! 💖

EDIT: adding @alwaysupatnight YOU ARE NOW OFFICIALLY TAGGED

and now for my answers behind the cut:

@astarkey’s questions:

1. Favorite fall activity? Anything outside, to be honest. It’s my favorite time of year! I do love reading in my hammock with a blanket before it gets too cold, though I’m not sure that counts as an activity.

2. Favorite song at the moment? Well, the one I’m most obsessing on is one I’m vidding right now, so I’m keeping that a secret. BUT, I’ve been listening to Setting Sun by Lord Huron a lot recently ever since @alwaysupatnight mentioned it in an ask about Culebra Seth. I hadn’t heard it before and I fell right in love with it.

3. Last movie you saw in theaters? Oh, it has been awhile since I actually went to a theater. I wanna say it was the first IT movie, cause I remember taking my brothers to see that. If I went after that I guess it didn’t leave an impression on me.

4. Favorite emoji/smiley? I really like 🥳 cause look how excited it is! Close second is 😎 because it makes me think of the Geckos when I use it.

5. Cold weather or hot weather? Cold weather, as stated above!

6. Are you a past, present, or future person? Hmm, I’m going to say present. I am a bit of a worrier by nature, so I intentionally try and keep myself grounded by staying in the moment as much as possible, so I’m not obsessing over what I did or about what could happen next. I’m reasonably successful with it.

7. From where you’re sitting, what’s the closest object on your right? Water bottle.

8. What’s something you’re weirdly afraid of? (For example, a hair dryer, airplanes, a microwave, etc.) Ok, so this going to sound very weird, but it’s grasshoppers. don’t mind spiders, hornets, bees, any of the normal creepy crawlies, they don’t bother me at all, but I have such an intense irrational reaction to grasshoppers, like a real fight or flight thing kicks in for me. I understand they can’t hurt me, but I don’t trust those little sideways hoppers AT ALL. Also, I used to spend a lot time catching (and releasing) bugs when I was a small child, and one day one BIT ME, which I didn’t know they can do, and the betrayal was so great that I have never forgiven them. And then if you want to see something that’s even more untrustworthy, google the spider cricket sometime. I don’t see as many of those, but my friend had some living underneath her porch one year, and they are terrible. (also harmless)

9. Favorite snack food? Soft pretzels with cheese are always a good time. And now I want one, dang it.

10. Favorite color to wear? Blue! I love blue so much.

11. Stargazing in an open field, watching the ocean tides on a lonely beach, or late night drives on the highway while listening to good music? I’m going to pick stargazing in an open field, because that sounds the most relaxing to me at the moment! But the other two also sound lovely.

@alwaysupatnight‘s asks:

1. Have you started any new hobbies this year? Vidding. if I’m allowed to stretch the definition of a year about 1 month past haha. I’ve also done a ton more “creative" writing since joining tumblr, all these asks and tag games are the most I’ve ever organized my thoughts and put them out there for others to actually see (excluding non voluntary things like schoolwork and work) It’s been a lot of fun to do both, and really allowed me to push myself out of my comfort zone.

2. Read any good books lately? Not recently, I have several checked out I need to get to soon before I have to return them.

3. Favorite color of nail polish to wear? Or if you don’t wear nail polish, the color of the laces on your fave pair of sneakers? I don’t wear nail polish most of the time, though I will let children paint my nails when they want, since they seem to love doing that. And my favorite sneaker laces are just the standard white they came with. I’m pretty causal and laid back fashion wise.

4. Faerie, mermaid, angel, or vampire? This is so broad! Am I reading/watching something they’re in, fighting them, auditioning them as room mates?! I’m going to go with Vampire (Mermaid as a second choice)

5. What is your MBTI type? INFJ

6. What does your phone case look like? (Describe or post a pic) It’s black, no design. I’m so boring an practical!!!! I picked it out based on reviews, I drop my phone way to much.

7. What is your dream vacation? Camping, with people I like. Maybe a road trip out west.

8. Would you tell us a little about your current WIP? (writing, art, gifset, whatever the project!!) Working on a new vid, I’d let myself get stuck finishing one up, and realized maybe I needed a break from that one. It’s a SethKate one I’ve wanted to do ever since I heard the song, and I’m just going to do it. It’s not AU? That’s all the spoilers for now.

9. What is the best movie you’ve seen this year? I SEE WHAT YOU DID THERE, BUT YES. Prospect was amazing, and does when that title! Runners up would be Priest, Crawl (I love disaster movies so much) and Knives Out.

10. What are your opinions on the child from The Mandalorian series? Really cute! I have only seen like 3 episodes, but I have seen all the gifs, (especially today 🤣) and look at the tiny adorable space baby with powers 🥰

11. What is your zodiac sign, and do you think it fits your personality? I am an Aquarius, I have no idea honestly. Maybe? Is there an official description I can read somewhere?

#tag games #replies #personal

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purplesurveys · 4 years

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723

What do you do when you can't sleep? I pick something to watch. Usually the background noise works in making me feel sleepier. Have you ever been threatened before? Physically, verbally, emotionally... I’ve had the full package. Don't you hate being labeled? I hate if it’s done in a mocking way or to reinforce insulting stereotypes, like Catholic Filipino boomers saying all atheists are evil and in need of ‘saving.’ But there are some labels that can be a source of comfort and give me a sense of identity, like if my friends can correctly remember my sexual orientation. Are you one of those people who says sorry too much or doesn't say it often? I do say it a lot. I also get reprimanded for it a lot. Have you ever had a cute doctor/dentist/nurse? No, and I mostly don’t think of them in that way... if I’m at the doctor/dentist, that just means I want to be healed lol.

Do you swallow your gum even though it's bad for you? I’ve never done it on purpose. The few times I accidentally swallowed gum I was worried it’d fuck up my stomach, but nothing bad has ever happened. Don't you hate it when you go to the bathroom & there's no toilet paper? I mean my parents always buy tissues in bulk, so we’ve never run out of them. If I catch the roll being empty, it’s easy to replace. ^When that happens do you ever just sit there & read shampoo bottles? We have bidets in our bathrooms. For houses with no bidets, the pair of tabo/balde would do to wash ourselves, at least for Filipino culture. Going into TMI territory over here but the idea of some countries/people only using dry toilet paper to wipe their ass has always been so odd for Asians. Do you wear jelly bracelets? Do you believe in the sexual meanings of them? I wore them a few times during childhood but I wasn’t obsessed nor did I collect hundreds of them. I didn’t know they had sexual meanings – that would’ve been my last thought as a kid. Are you good at guessing things? Not guessing, but I’ve had a decent track record of picturing and predicting worst case scenarios that end up happening close to the way I imagine them. Have you ever gambled? I played Bingo when I was like 9. There was a period when my late grand-aunt’s friends would come over at her place (we lived in a duplex, so I knew whenever a game was starting and it was easy to walk over there) and play Bingo, and it lasted for a few months. When your stomach growls do you ignore it for awhile or immediately get food? I like waiting for a while before deciding I’m *really* hungry and looking for food. Have you ever thrown up on someone in front of you on a amusement park ride? OMG, never. Have you ever thought you were dreaming so you had someone actually pinch you? No. I only ever saw this in cartoons, too. When you get nervous, does your heart pound extra fast? Isn’t that kind of an important sign of being nervous though? If my heart wasn’t beating fast I’d think that everything was under control. Have you ever mowed your lawn? Do you find it fun or annoying? Our village has a staff member that’s in charge of mowing everyone’s front lawns, so we don’t really have to. Do you have a garden at your house? I wouldn’t call it a garden. We have a couple of tall trees but that’s it. Do you like making puppet figures with your shadow? I don’t hate it, but like I don’t actively seek this out. When you're on the internet does time go fast or slow? When I was 10 and the internet was still fairly new to me and there were still a billion sites to check out, time was definitely fast. I’d be on the laptop all day and suffice it to say I was addicted, which wasn’t the healthiest situation for a 10 year old. These days time just feels normally paced since we’ve grown used to the internet now... it’s literally a part of everyone’s lives and is everywhere from phones to TVs to fucking lightbulbs, so it’s all just part of everyday routine. When you're angry do you take it out on other people? I make it a point not to do this but sometimes I’ll crack under pressure and end up snapping at someone. What's the key to true happiness? Key’s different for everyone. Who do you look up to for your style? For the longest time it was Audrey Hepburn, which is why I have a ton of little black dresses piled up in my closet to this day. More recently though I’ve been wanting to dress up like Rachel Green from Friends. What was the longest phone conversation you've ever had? Ugh it’s so cringey now but when Gab and I were newly dating we once had an 8 hour Viber call. Never did it again.

How many pillows do you sleep with? Two big ones. What's your life philosophy? “You don’t have to be blood to be family” ngh I say this on surveys a lot. Soz, questions like this make me repeat it. Have you ever played strip poker or would you ever? I’ve never played it. I don’t even know how poker works and it’s so annoying cause my favorite shows tend to make at least one episode focused on a poker game, and I’m left not understanding any of the dialogue. Would you still go out with someone even if you thought they would cheat on you? These cheating questions can be so tricky but generally I wouldn’t consider dating someone who I know to be a past cheater. Would you date someone who didn't want to have sex until they were married? Yes. I mean I was already this kind of person with Gabie anyway when we started dating; she was just able to change my mind which I’m super ok with because I’ve never regretted it. How much cash do you have on you right now? I have a little over P2000 in my wallet. My school has since ordered to end the semester by April 30 so I had no idea that the P2000 my parents gave me last March was gonna be my last allowance from them ever :’( What's your favorite thing to order at a Mexican food restaurant? I haven’t really had Mexican food that’s purely Mexican, i.e. not Tex-Mex. Idk if it’s right to say fajitas and chimichangas since Google says they’re Tex-Mex, but they’re my usuals. If you got to magically make somebody disappear, who would it be and why? Can I make a virus disappear instead? Do you prefer to cook or eat out? Eat out. Because I can’t cook. Have you ever peed yourself while laughing? Never. When you don't like someone, do you let them know? I mean obviously I don’t confront them directly just to say I don’t like them, but I’ll make extra effort to avoid them and I just wouldn’t interact if we happen to be in the same room. How would you build your ultimate sundae? Not really a sundae girl so I wouldn’t know what combination works. McDo’s hot fudge sundae is satisfying enough for me. Would you date someone who went to church on a regular basis? If it came to that, and especially if I really like the person, I might give them a chance (that’s a billion plus points for my mom, anyway) on the condition that they don’t force me to attend with them, and they don’t try to convert me. What is your favorite curse word? Fuck. Would you rather see a movie at the theater or at home on DVD? Egh it depends. There are movies I can be excited enough about to wanna catch it in the cinema, and there are some that I’m not invested as much in and that I could wait for to show up at an illegal film website lol. If the police came to your door & said "you're under arrest!" what would it be for? The police in this country are the Devil and will arrest and kill anybody. That said, I can be attacked in my own home, arrested for absolutely nothing, and they will get away with it. Are you good at giving massages? Nope. What movie do you know just about every line from? Your basic white girl movies – Titanic, The Proposal, White Chicks. Oh and also my favorite Two for the Road, of course. Do you prefer cupcakes or muffins? Cupcakes. If I absolutely have to eat a muffin it has to be chocolate, otherwise I’m not touching it. I’m all about the sweet. What are the three "nevers" of your life? Doing hard drugs, drunk driving, eating fruits. What lifts your spirits when life gets you down? Good food, good movies, good friends. My dog. Is sometimes being silent more effective than having to say things? Yes. Do you smile a lot or not enough? I think I do it enough.

#survey #surveys

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the-captains-ayebrows · 5 years

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Yet another tag meme

Haven’t done one of these in a while so why not?

Tagged by: @thisonesatellite Helloooooo! Nice to meet ya! Y’all go read her fic. It’s quality stuff.

Put your playlist on shuffle and name the first four songs.

I can’t remember the last time I made a playlist or really even played any music that I’d bought/downloaded. I do the Pandora thing or listen to other people’s playlists on 8tracks.

Lately I’ve been seeking out 90’s country and classic or southern rock. There have been some “Winchester Brothers” playlists…

Grab the nearest book. Turn to page 23, line 27.

“I glanced at the floor. The orange lines of Greg’s ward had grown so dim, I could barely see them.”

— Magic Bites, Ilona Andrews

(I haven’t actually started reading this book yet, but I have much love for the authors, so I’m looking forward to it)

Ever had a song or a poem written about you?

Ahhh... this is kind of cringey for me. I dated too many musicians and artistic types. Ok. Here goes.

I had a guitarist FWB for a while who wrote some indie rock song that he said was about me, but there were no lyrics, so ...? *shrugs*

Another dude I dated claimed that he wrote a song with a highly suggestive title while we were together. I call bullshit on me having anything to with that one, though, because we did not ever engage in the acts described in said song. Ahem.

Also my ex-fiancé told me after we broke up that one of his grad school buddies made a student film about our relationship and break-up and I’m pretty damn sure I was the villain of that piece. I’ve never actually seen it. So basically, I’m “Jed Mosley” from “The Wedding Bride.”

When was the last time you played air guitar?

Probably within the last 48 hours. I also sing really loudly in my car.

Celebrity crushes?

I’m not crushing hard on anyone right now, but Colin O’donoghue will always have a special place in my heart. I like looking at pretty pictures of pretty dudes, though.

Sounds I hate/love?

Love the sound of little kids laughing, cicadas in my backyard, ocean waves.

Hate the sound of alarm clocks/phone alerts and the sound my cats make when they’re hacking up hairballs.

Do you drive, and have you ever crashed?

Um, yes and yes. No one was ever seriously injured, but I’ve totaled 3 cars in my lifetime.

Last book you read?

Heartless by Marissa Meyer. It’s an origin story of The Queen of Hearts and I LOVED it. Really well-done slow descent into madness. Same author that wrote the Lunar Chronicles which I also loved dearly.

Do you believe in ghosts?

I don’t NOT believe in them.

Do you believe in aliens?

Yes. I think there’s life out there.

Do you like the smell of gasoline?

This is, perhaps, oddly specific, but I like the smell of gasoline powered lawn equipment. Or… now that I’m considering it, maybe I just think it’s hot when the hubby does yard work.

Last movie you saw?

Avengers: Endgame in the theater. Crazy Rich Asians on streaming.

Do you have an obsession right now?

I’m binge watching Supernatural on Netflix, if that counts. I’m up to season 10. There you go - Jensen Ackles is my current celeb crush.

Do you tend to hold grudges?

I do, but a person against whom I held a grudge would likely never know it. I don’t really do anything with my grudges. I just kind of have a grudge box sitting in the back of my mind.

I hereby officially tag anyone and everyone who wants to play!

#it me #gtkm #tag meme #tag games

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gizmo1022 · 7 years

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So this is REALLY LONG and PERSONAL and FULL of possible Triggers so read at your own discretion. I just needed to write this out because I’ve been dealing with it for years and...yeah.

My first boyfriend was 24 and I had just turned 18. I was a virgin with stereotypical ideas about a “first time” and was very nervous. He was experienced and pestered me until I gave in, which I did because I thought he wouldn’t want to wait for me and this was my first relationship. I hated it. It was awful, painful, and humiliating. I regretted saying ok the second my clothes were off but I thought I was stuck and couldn't renege because I had no idea how any of this worked. I avoided a second time as much as possible, never saying yes or initiating, but just kinda going with it if he wanted to. I still hated it every time and began to feel incredible self-loathing and disgust. Then I drank alcohol/got drunk for the first time ever at a party. I only remember flashes of that night, but I DO remember he initiated nonconsensual sex with me, HE RAPED ME!, in the back seat of his car. I was under 21 and drunk for the first time, not coherent or responsive at all, and yet that didn’t stop him. Then he bragged about it to all my friends for a week! He kept showing everyone the condom wrapper he kept in the cup holder like it was a trophy and acting like I was ok with all of it. I hated him! Even though I hated him, I felt like I was partially to blame for what happened and I directed a lot of the hate and disgust at myself. I thought I had nobody to talk to because I didn’t understand that I I wasn’t at fault. I thought because he was my boyfriend and because I got drunk, people would say I was at fault. I was also ashamed and couldn’t even tell my parents or brothers etc. I still have never told them. And the most fucked up thing is, I also felt like I couldn’t escape the guy who did this to me because I didn’t want to hurt his feelings. I HATED him and felt absolute DISGUST every time he touched me or spoke to me, but my fear of confrontation and having someone mad at me kept me from leaving him. Eventually, I did, but it took me outright refusing to be alone with him and acting like a barely functioning zombie before HE realized we had issues and asked me if I wanted to break up. That was MONTHS! It took me months of being miserable and depressed and terrified of being with him until I finally broke up with him and it was only because HE figured out that I wanted out and asked me. I didn't even have the guts to say yes...I just cried and shook my head yes and then waited a half an hour for him to calm down enough to drive me home since I was stranded at his house.

My second boyfriend was worse. It was years before I even thought about dating again and I was so sure that by that point there had to be something wrong with me because no guys seemed to want to talk to me. Of course I was an extreme loner and never bothered to socialize so that probably didn’t help. So when two guys in my campus cafeteria started flirting with me I thought maybe there was hope for me to be normal after all. Maybe my first relationship aside, I would be able to have a healthy bond with someone. But the fear of intimacy remained and I thought maybe what I needed was to stop taking it so seriously. So one of the guys messaged me that night and it was fine at first until he started getting very forward and sexual. Sending me links to weird sexual positions and asking creepy questions. I was uncomfortable and tried to change the subject or stick to one-word answers in the hopes that he’d realize I wasn’t invested in that type of conversation. But I didn’t stop talking to him. I should’ve, and looking back now, I realize it would’ve been so easy and saved me a lot of grief had I just spoke up or told him to fuck off. But I hadn’t had a real friend or anyone to talk to since high school two years ago and I thought maybe this was just how college guys talked. I didn’t want to hurt his feelings because this was the first person that showed even just friendly interest in me, let alone anything else, in a LONG time. So I kept responding albeit halfheartedly.

That’s when he told me all the sex talk, which he was 100% guilty of, was giving him blue balls and I would be a slut and a bitch if I didn’t take responsibility and have sex with him the next day. I was terrified. I was sick to my stomach and so anxious I thought I might just throw up. But I believed him because I didn’t know that wasn’t a real thing. He made it sound like he was gonna get sick if I didn’t take care of his problem. He made me feel dirty and awful and like I owed him just for being his sounding board for a few hours while he went off on a tangent. I thought about just not going to school. Telling my dad I was sick and skipping classes that day. I thought about NEVER going back to the cafeteria and blocking him so I never saw him again. I thought about a lot of things that I should’ve done but didn’t. I was on the verge of tears when my dad dropped me off at school and was so close to saying something to him. In my head, I was begging him to take me back home and hug me and never let me meet with stupid boys again.But in the end, I went.Because I thought of how much I wanted people to like me and be my friends. I was lonely and still fucked up after my first boyfriend. Is spent the whole morning trying to convince myself it was ok, just part of the college experience, lots of people hook up and maybe that’s what I needed to be more normal and accepting of intimacy. People who treated sex more like a casual/fun activity seemed to be happier, right? SO I met him with my mind in panic mode, feeling conflicted and disgusted by myself. He then had a friend, a guy I had never met, drive the two of us to that guy’s apartment. I was so scared and really wanted to back out but by that point, it was impossible because I was stranded in a strange man’s apartment and I had no idea where I even was. And calling my dada at that point was out of the question because I was too ashamed to even admit what was happening. And so started the most awkward, awful sex ever. I once again HATED it. I thought maybe I hated it with my first boyfriend because I wasn’t ready yet or it wasn't what I had imagined, or he wasn’t any good at it. Now I wasn’t sure if I just hated sex in general or if the first time ruined it for me forever. All I knew was I wanted it to end so I can go home and cry myself into oblivion. ANd the whole time, the friend was right outside listening in like a creep. Afterwards, without even discussing it with me, the blueballs douchebag insists we’re dating now, and I just went with it. I CANT BELIEVE I SAID SURE WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME I NEVER WANTED TO SEE HIM AGAIN AND I HATED HIM WHY WOULD I AGREE TP DATE HIM AM I STUPID DO I JUST LIKE PUNISHING MYSELF I HATE MYSELF SO MUCH!!! I agreed because I’m a fuckup that can’t even disappoint people I don’t like, and I was desperate for someone to talk to/friends at school and because I was so disgusted with the idea of having a one-night stand I thought dating him would at least make that better. WORST DECISION OF MY LIFE! OR CLOSE TO IT BECAUSE I FUCKUP A LOT AND WITH EXTREME RESULTS!

My second boyfriend NEVER stopped ever. I was always afraid of being alone with him. I only went to his house if I knew his parents would be there and even then he’d sneak around every chance he got to touch me or make me touch him. I NEVER initiated it. I NEVER asked for it, I NEVER SAID YES!, I NEVER EVER EVER like it or wanted it. I thought there was something wrong with me, that I was weird and just would never enjoy or look forward to or want sex at all and that when he started on me, I had to take it because that’s what girlfriends do and I was fucked up in the head and he was the normal one. I THOUGHT ALL OF THAT!! But it wasn’t just once in a while. He was obsessed. He’d drag me into the woods, he’d make us sit in the back of the theater when all I wanted was to watch a damn movie, he sneaks into the bathroom with me, he’d put his hands on me even when I was home in my living room with my brothers (including two small children) running around. He NEVER STOPPED AND I HATED IT! But I didn’t know how to say no or get away from him. ALL I knew was to bear with it and try to keep distance between us as much as possible. The worst was on a school field trip to six flags. I took a blanket because I like to sleep on long rides and it was gonna be chilly at night. He took it as an opportunity to put his fingers in my panties the whole ride and I was TERRIFIED AND MORTIFIED. SO scared someone would notice, that we’d get in HUGE trouble, that my parents would know, that people KNEW what he was doing. I was so scared but I couldn’t do anything to stop him without bringing attention to myself. I wanted to cry. I wanted TO DIE! I would've rather take a BULLET TO THE FACE than have his hands on me especially when others could see. I HATED HIM SO MUCH! Eventually, I tried to kill myself, badly...I had no idea ibuprofen wasn’t exactly deadly...took SO many and it did nothing but make me nauseous...And mister asshole boyfriend broke his promise 5 minutes after making it by telling everyone including his parents some crazy abridged story about how I was clinging to life and he found me, he didn't, and heroically rescued me. I overheard it all becaus eth estuff they gave me made me unable to move enought to even open my eyes or speak but I was fully aware of my surroundings. That was finally enough for me to break up with him...albeit I had help from some new friends who hated him and my family...who HATED him.

My last boyfriend was a “niceguy” who helped me leave boyfriend2 because he liked me and then pestered me to date him for a year. I finally did thinking he helped me so much I guess I owe him and maybe the first two were just awful and this wholesome guy will be exactly what I need. BIG MISTAKE NICE GUYS ARE ONLY NICE BECAUSE THEY WANT THINGs. THAT IS GENERALIZING IM AWARE AND I KNOW It's NOT TRUE ASSHOLES I HAVE % BROTHERS I KNOW ALL MEN ARENT BAD SO SHUT UP I JUST APPARENTLY ONLY ATTRACT BAD GUYS EVEN WHEN THEY'RE POSING AS GOOD GUYS! I thought I could trust him and be open and honest with him. I thought he was different! He knew what bf2 did and that I didn’t want sex. He KNEW and went into our relationship knowing that but still bothered me about it. He said he was willing to wait but he was a desperate virgin and his patience would only go so far. I gave him a really far away option...when/if we move in together, thinking it would either long ways away or never happen. I was upfront about it all and he SAID IT WAS OK. but still bothered me about it, trying to get me to make it happen sooner. And I AM AN IDIOT I SAID FINE MAYBE IF WERE JUST NOT AT EITHER OF OUR HOUSES OR A FRIENDS BUT A NEUTRAL PLACE. IM SO DUMB OF COURSE HE’D CONVINCE ME TO GIVE HIM A LOOPHOLE BECAUSE I HATE PEOPLE BEING UPSET WITH ME AND I GIVE PEOPLE WHAT THEY WANT EVEN IF IT DESTROYS ME! So after months of buttering me up with expensive gifts, that I didn’t need nor want... I HATE JEWELRY JUST CUZ MOST GIRLS LIKE IT AND ITS EXPENSIVE DOESNT MAKE IT A UNIVERSAL PERFECT GIFT AND IF HE HAD NO IDEA I’D SAY THANKS BUT I KNEW HE’D WANT TO GET ME JEWELRY AND I HATE IT/THINK IT’S A WASTE OF MONEY SO I TOLD HIM NEVER TO BUY ME ANY BUT HE DID BECAUSE HE LIKES TO LOOK GOOD AND GENEROUS TO FRIENDS AND HAVING HIS GF WEARING JEWELRY MAKE HIM HAPPY BUT HE GODDAMN KNEW I DIDNT WANT ANY UCKING ASSHOLE JUST TRYING TO MAKE HIMSELF LOOK GOOD AND ME UNGRATEFUL IN CASE WE EVER GOT IN A FIGHT OR BROKE UP FUCKING GUILT TRIPPING M WHO GUIT TRIPS HERSELF WORSE THAN ANYONE I HATE HIM!...He plans an expensive trip to Boston, basically trying to guilt/bribe me for sex using the hotel as his loophole. I KNEW that’s what he was doing but he already spent the money and I felt bad. And a little part of me thought...naw “niceguy” wouldn’t do that so it’s gotta be a misunderstanding and he’s just trying to give me an early bday present before the semester started.

NOPE! We had fun, he spent money, then we went into a convenience store and started showing me condoms and asking me about them. I shut down. I couldn't even function enough to smile anymore. I stared at him in disbelief and walked away without saying a word. I KNOW he knows I was avoiding/running away from the question. Like who just walks away with a bitchface and doesn’t answer a question if they don’t want to talk about it. I should’ve said no right there and then. He may have even listened to me. He would’ve been grumpy and bitchy...might have even tried laying on the guilt, but an outright NO probably would’ve been enough. But what if it wasn’t? I was stuck there far from home with no money and he was spending so much that I felt guilty LIKE HE WANTED ME TO FEEL GULIT-TRIPPINGSEX FROM AN UNWILLING PERSON!!! I didn’t want to, I felt like there must be something wrong with me for not wanting to, that maybe it was unfair to him because I wasn't sure I'd EVER want to and does that mean I was leading him ON? But he knew why?! He knew I had been traumatized!?? I didn’t want to but I thought I was being unfair for not wanting to and I was afraid to vocalize my feelings, afraid to upset him or let him down. I didn’t know how to say no with my words so I tried with my body language and GOD ALL I WANTED WAS FOR HIM TO NOTICE! Why the hell did he not notice if he was so in love with me?! How could he not tell by my complete mood shift, inability to make eye contact, absolute refusal to respond to the subject, my stiff frightened body language and the simple fact that he KNEW I was afraid of sex and he never stated that this trip was all an expensive/elaborate ploy for me to give in and get him laid.

So night came, the room had a jacuzzi, I wore a GODDAMN BATHING SUIT IN IT HOPING HE’D GET THE HINT I DIDN’T WANT THIS, and when he went to shower I put PJS on and turned the lights out and PRAYED I would fall asleep and he’d give up. He didn’t. He woke me up. He didn’t ask...just started stripping us. I was so broken. I just cried. I cried...SOBBED...the whole time and kept trying to pull away from him. He tried to get me on top and I just kept rolling away and crying until he gave that up. He took what he wanted and I didn’t participate at all. Then I had to sleep next to him all night...ride home with him and act like everything was fine. He knew he fucked up too. I don’t think he understood how bad....if I accused him of rape HE ABSOLUTELY DID RAPE ME!! he’d probably be confused and deny it because he’s a “niceguy” and an idiot and he deserved it for waiting a few months and buying me things. I completely turned off. I was so depressed and so angry and so ashamed and conflicted that I barely responded to him at all and I could tell he knew I was pissed. He tried to buy me off again HE BOUGHT ME A GODDAMN LAPTOP, and of course our families and friends only saw that...him being generous and me being cold so it was all my fault and when we broke up I lost ALMOST ALL the friends I had made BECAUSE THEY DIDN”T KNOW I NEVER TOLD ANYONE! AND HELL NOBODY WOULD BELIEVE ME ANYWAY CUZ HE’s SO NICE AND BUYS ME THINGS!!! After a few months f being angry/afraid/short-tempered of him and cold-shouldering him he realized it was pretty much over and broke up with me THANK GOD I AM SO BAD AT DOING THE BREAKING UP I WAS HOPING HE’D DO IT. Although he had the nerve to act like I was the one that hurt him with my depression and disdain...like poor him...I was bad for his mental state and made him stressed.

I wish that was it but there’s more. This guy who I was friends with and wasn’t mutually connected to bf3 started showing interest in me when I was finally single...but in a bad way. I used to love hanging out with him and our friend Angie. But I was single and Angie wasn’t and he started being creepy. Insisting on being my ride everywhere even though my dad was fine with driving me or Angie would’ve been more convenient. Then when I was alone with him he would talk nonstop about my body in sexual ways... asks me if he could give me a massage and asking me for favors. I declined but he was persistent and handsy and even whipped out his dick in the car and tried to push my head onto it before I pulled away and said no. I don’t know where the strength to say no was coming from in this case....maybe his laidback attitude made it easier. But it’s not like that ever stopped him completely. He never got his feelings hurt about it and never stopped asking. So I went to great lengths to avoid rides with him. Not going to fun things if I had no ride, making up lies and excuses, hiding in the bushes after Angie’s baby shower so he thought I’d been picked up since my ride was gonna be late. I even lied about my phone being lost as the reason I couldn’t return his calls. One time I got stuck accepting a ride from him from the mall to my house only for him to immediately pull into a corner of the mall garage and say he was too tired to drive but giving me a massage would relax him.I was panicking and very uncomfortable with the things he’d been saying and doing so I faked a phone call from my dad and that convinced him to drive me home. The WHOLE ride...20+ minutes...he spent talking about my boobs. The final straw was him trying to get me to pose in skimpy outfits in a hotel for him...I just knew that was a dumb disaster waiting to happen. SO I stopped hanging out with him AND Angie because I needed to cut ties with him completely and she kinda went her own way with the baby and her asshole fiance.

ONE MORE THING! When I was dating bf2 we got in a fight WHY DIDN’T I BREAK UP WITH HIM THEN AND THERE!? and I ran off campus into the city and got lost. I only had my dad’s and his # and wasn’t willing to call either of them for help (my dad cuz I would’ve had some explaining to do). SO I’m lost, kinda scared, wandering the streets with a backpack on and in Ninja Turtle PJ bottoms. An older guy stops and asks me if I need a ride and I said no...cuz you know hitchhiking is dangerous, stupid, and illegal. I said no 3 times but the guy didn’t speak very good English ALTHOUGH NO IS PRETTY FUCKING UNIVERSAL!, so I gave in awkwardly and explained I just was lost and needed a ride to campus. He said ok and started driving...and asked me how old I was...If I like alcohol and wanted a drink...offered me a lollipop from his glove compartment I AM NOT SHITTING YOU OR EXAGGERATING THIS 100% HAPPENED IT WAS SO CREEPY! And then I’m getting really nervous cuz we’re getting to like suburbs which is NOT where school is and he pulls into a cul-de-sac and I’m so scared at this point. Then he asks me how much for a BJ. THE FUCK I’M EARLY TWENTIES IN MY PJS WITH MY BACKPACK AND I TOLD HIM I JUST WANTED TO GET BACK TO SCHOOL AND WHAT HE THINKS I’M A PROSTITUTE OR SOMETHING? Not that there’s anything wrong with being a prostitute but that’s definitely NOT ME. SO I’m telling him No and fumbling for the door and he’s mad now but more worried I’m gonna report him and says he doesn’t want trouble so he drives back to the main road and tells me to get out. I’m even more hopelessly lost than before and so much for random old man’s act of kindness, he wasn’t gonna help me unless I gave him a BJ wth?! SO I ended up having to call my bf that I was mad at and get directions back to campus and when I showed everyone the lollipop OF COURSE I TOOK IT I’M NOT RUDE BUT I WASN’T GONNA EAT IT They were all blown away and making fun of me etc. SO don’t hitchhike ever is the moral of this story. Also, even kind looking old men can be creeps. Also, don’t get lost in anger in cities.

The final thing to say is. I don't know if I’m asexual and that’s why I never liked sex or if I don’t like it because I had bad experiences or both. I don't know if I’ll ever be able to be intimate and like it. But I WANT TO because I WANT kids more than anything! I want kids so bad and I’m getting close to thirty now and every time I have somebody that might be interested in me...I sabotage it because I start panicking and it’s like...once I get what I want I don’t want it anymore. I need a man to have kids (I could never adopt with my history of self-harm etc.) but I think I’m so screwed up it’s never gonna happen and time is running out and I don’t wanna even live if I can’t have kids. Like I get it...some women are happy without them. That’s awesome. That’s NOT me. I want my own children so much I feel like my life is meaningless without them. And I’m starting to give up on the idea because not only can I not do relationships anymore because of all this trauma, but what guys would WANT to be with someone like me anyway. And if I’m so fucked up maybe it’s better I DON’T have kids because I’ll probably just fuck them up too! SO why am I even trying? Why am I still living? Kids are the only thing in this world that I want and without them, I feel like I have nothing...no future and so no reason to live. I just wanna die. And I’m SO ANGRY that these men contributed to all this. If I can never be fixed...if this is really all that there is...if they ruined me forever then what’s even the point?!

But I can’t die because I have ittle brothers...they’re just kids....and me dying would be so selfish and painful for them. I’m trapped. Trapped in a life I don’t want that’s never gonna be worthwhile, feeling depressed and like shit and dwelling on trauma from the past....stuck with all this pain because I have to live for other people’s happiness. I’ll never find happiness. and Living means misery. But My misery is not as important as their happiness...I’m living...barely...just for my brothers and I don’t know if I can keep it up forever. I feel like I’m gonna break permanantly one day and I’m gonna hurt them. Is it only amatter of time. I’ve been hospitalized 4 times in the last decade for hurting myself....maybe there’s a limit to this. I’m just SO conflicted. Why does everything have to be so goddamn diffiult? My financial situation, lack of career, fear of driving, awful intimacy/trauma issues and just overall depression anxiety and self loathing make life so hard. But I LOVE my brothers. I just wish they did’t love me back. If they didn’t I could die without guilt. There’s just no easy way out is there.

#Personal #tw: sucide mention #tw: rape #etc. this is like word vomit so idek how much is in there just don't read or read carefully #god im so messed up i need help #somebody help me i don't know how to deal

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traciedemars · 5 years

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Winter Time, and Best Time to Buy a Home...

Upcoming Free (& non-promotional) Home Buyer Classes:

...we also have home seller classes available. Link on left on website page

Saturday, November 16th, from 11am-2pm (ish) Vancouver YMCA, conference room 11324 NE 51st Circle, Vancouver WA (corner of SR500 & Gher Road/112th Ave).

Saturday, December 7th, from 9am-12pm (ish) Marshall Community Center, conference room 1009 E. McLoughlin Blvd, Vancouver WA (kitty corner from Clark College)

Monday, December 9th, from 5pm - 8pm (ish) Marshall Community Center, Conference room 1009 E McLoughlin Blvd, Vancouver WA (kitty corner from Clark College) Saturday, December 14th, from 12pm-3pm (ish) Vancouver YMCA, conference room 11324 NE 51st Circle, Vancouver WA (corner of SR500 & Gher Road/112th Ave).

If these class dates and/or times don't work for you, please let us know. We understand that you have lives, and families, and work. We will work something out that works better with your schedule. Just let us know.... Remember...with reservation...we will throw in lunch, or dinner! :-D ~~~~~~~~~

Happy Veterans Day...

I want to take a quick moment to thank our veterans... those who have served, and those who are serving. I appreciate the sacrifices you have made, and are making. I have many clients, friends, and family who've served, or are serving, and I've had many tell me that the hardest part is being so far from family & home. Home..it's a powerful word....and for many folks one of the reasons why they do serve. So...thank you...

Now, today is November 12th...and like many I am enjoying the new Disney+! Oh my, so many movies that I a remember as a child, and when my older kids were much younger... Blackbeard's Ghost, Pollyanna, Bedknobs & Broomsticks, and so much more. It's a glorious thing! Don't forget about the Client Appreciation Event coming up for 11/23 from 3pm-6pm (or thereabouts) for Frozen 2! Chris Berg buy out the entire theater for these events a few times a year to say, Thank you, to our clients. We appreciate you! Now...Frozen 2 is sold out in the general area, but there are some seats available in the 21+ area, and we are going to start rsvp'ing for Star Wars IX in December!! Thank you for your business and for your referrals...

So, this week, let's talk about the current market for a quick moment.....I know that it's gray and dreary, and everyone has the holidays on their mind, but honestly, if you are even 'thinking' about buying a home....NOW is the best time. Yes, there are not a whole lot of homes on the market, but the market is not as competitive as it is during the spring time. Remember that from offer to keys it will take about 6-7 weeks. The market tends to pick up and start getting crazy again right about late February/early March-April when folks start getting their tax refunds.

Now...please remember that my magic wand is broken, and the magic 8 ball exploded all over my house with the coming holidays... so no one really knows what is going to happen. Typically in an election year we don't see a whole lot of movement with interest rates, or any major changes that could disrupt the economy. Seattle and the Portland Metro are still very solid markets, and we are still in a sellers market, but it isn't as strong or fierce as it was a few years ago. We are still seeing multiple offers on homes in certain price ranges, but for many other homes we are seeing sellers paying some closing costs for the buyers. What will happen for the coming year though? This is a lot like foretelling the weather right now... as it really depends on when things happen. Most industry sources do say that home prices should start plateauing though. This doesn't mean that the home prices will not go up...they just shouldn't go up like last year. They should steady out. As people see the change in the market coming, more homeowners should put the home on the market so they can begin their move to their new home, and this will help all the price ranges see more homes on the market. So, yes, there aren't as many homes on the market right now than there will be say around...spring break... the homes that are on the market though are solid sellers.

Yes, prices are still going up, but not as much as they were the past few years, so let's talk about how all that works. I bought my old home in late 2001, with a 6.875% interest rate....don't feel bad, or shocked....in a 'healthy' market, a 'normal' interest rate would be about 7%. We were THRILLED to be under 7%! We sold that home in 2017, and it was harder than I thought it would be. It was our first home, and we had lived there for 16 years. It was the craziest thing, but did you know that when our buyers purchased our home for the $285,000 it was worth, with the 3.5% interest rate.... our mortgages were almost THE SAME! Wait...I'm not (that) crazy...it's economics. Yes, they bought it for more than I owed, but with a much lower interest rate. That equaled my lower owed amount, but higher interest rate. How crazy is that??? Now, here's the crazy part... in 2016, my old house was only worth about $245,000, and right now, that same home is worth $330,000! NUTS!!! My mother purchased a home in the 80's for $70,000, but her interest rate was 18.375%!!! ....now that is crazy!! The point of this is that while yes, prices are going up, the interest rates are still really low, so you can purchase more home. When this changes, and interest rates rise it doesn't mean that home prices will immediately start dropping, they should start leveling off ...it will take a bit of time to balance out though.

I have clients asking me if they should just settle then on a home, and frankly this is a tough question. No, you shouldn't 'just settle' on a home, but you may have to adjust either the type of home you want, the location, or be able to go up in purchase price to get what you want. Please remember that this most likely is not your last home, but your home for the next 5-10 years....that's the average. Know what your top 3 things are that you need in a home. Whether you are buying a home, or selling a home...it is exciting, scary, fun, and frustrating. It's a lot like a roller coaster, or driving down Mill Plain during rush hour,....or during that last month of pregnancy. I tell you....there's a reason I don't drink often.....I'm afraid once I start that I won't stop! ;-D (just kidding) Buying and/or selling a home always going to be a a roller coaster when you're on the ride. We're here though to help...that's what we do.

When you are looking for a home, you need to consider more than just the house. You are also buying the neighborhood, the schools, the property taxes, the local parks, the neighbors, and the local infrastructure. The home needs to 'fit' you like your favorite pair of pj's. For example....this last weekend I had a client look at a home that she liked. On paper it was everything she said she wanted, and she couldn't find anything against the house that would cause her to not want to write an offer. So why was she hesitant? Because this home was that sweater or shirt that looks good on the rack, and so you try it on. It fits ok, and it looks all right, but there is just 'something' that is 'off' with it.....you can't figure it out either. Sometimes you buy it, but never wear it, and sometimes you put it back. Buying the 'right' home is a lot like that. You can, and will, see homes you like, but they just don't 'fit'. Put that home back. Sometimes you see an item of clothing on the rack that you really don't know about....but you try it on anyway and BAM! you look AMAZING! Some homes don't look like much from the outside, but you get inside and they are amazing. Remember that internet home photos are a lot like internet dating....you never know what you are going to see when you get there, and many agents hire professional photographers for a reason. I can always tell which photos an agent did themselves, and who hired someone. Finding the 'right' home is like sliding into your favorite jeans, or boots.....there is just something about it that 'fits'. I see homes I 'like' all the time, but just because I like it doesn't mean it fits. If you are obsessed with a home that you have seen though. You really like the home, and you keep going back to the pictures, and driving by the house.....that's the 'right' home....even if it was one of the first homes you saw, or it was something you didn't think you wanted, or weren't sure about. That home is that sweater/shirt/shoes that you just weren't sure about....until you tried it on. Darling, you look AMAZING! Trust your instincts....this is YOUR home, and YOUR mortgage. With rents going up so much lately you can buy for about what your renting...or close to it.

What is the best time to buy, or sell? Whenever YOU are ready. Sometimes waiting makes sense, and sometimes it really doesn't. I am a firm believer that the right home will always be ready when you are, and that it will all fall into place. Remember....your agent works for you. YOUR agent isn't a salesperson. We shouldn't be trying to 'sell' you on anything. YOUR agent works for YOU....not the other way around. When you hire an agent you are hiring a representative; someone who should be looking out for your best interests. Always ask questions. We do this all the time, and we love it, so use our knowledge to your advantage. There really is NO stupid question in real estate. There is always learning opportunities, and that is goes for us as well. If i can't answer your question; I will help you find someone who can. We're in this together.

Don't forget though... that the first step in ANY adventure is education. Take a home buyer class, or a home seller class....that's what they're there for.

Information

is power, and as always...May the odds be ever in your favor out there....

If you are looking for a real estate agent, I would love to be able to help you.

If you have any questions, or comments please get a hold of me anytime. You can call, text, email, or even facebook me. Please remember that while I mean these emails/blogs to be helpful, and educational, I am still hoping that you will call, or email me as I would be honored to help you with your home buying, or home selling adventure.

As always....this is just a quick overview.... again...and I can't say this enough...please remember that your agent is NOT a salesperson, and should not be acting like one. Real Estate is not really about houses, it is about relationships. Your agent, and your lender work for YOU. You drive the bus...we are merely GPS to help you get to your goals. Like the classes, this weekly blog email is to help you with your home adventure. The goal is to be informative and non-promotional. :-) We are, however, hoping you will call and want us to help with your adventure. Thank you again for your business and your referrals!! ...and thank you for referring these classes to your friends, family, and co-workers. ....disclaimer...if you have already purchased a home, or would no longer like to receive these emails, please let me know and I will be happy to remove you from any further mailings... Upcoming Topics:

Winter Home Maintenance & things to look for...

Last Week: Delayed Possession...what is this madness?

Have a great day, and I will talk to you soon,

;-D

Tracie DeMars

Real Estate broker

Re/Max - Van Mall

360/ 903-3504 cell

360/ 882-3600 fax

www.traciedemars.com

[email protected]

“Interested in free and non promotional home education classes? Go to www.freehomebuyerclasses.com for local upcoming home buyer and home SELLER classes, or facebook: Tracie DeMars Real Estate for my home buyer education blog.”

"Listen to the mustn'ts, child. Listen to the don'ts. Listen to the shouldn'ts, the impossibles, the won'ts. Listen to the never haves, then listen close to me... Anything can happen, child. Anything can be."

- Shel Silverstein, American poet, cartoonist and composer, (1930 - 1999).

#traciedemars #traciedemarsrealestate #traciedemarsremax #remax #traciedemarsrealtor #buyingahome #sellingahome #knowingishalfthebattle #knowledgeispower #learningtobuyahome #learningtobuyahomedotcom

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merrymikes · 7 years

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ok so i was tagged by the lovely niara @thelouvrc to do this !!! and i’m tagging anyone who wants to do it. live ya life peeps !

name: lola

gender: female

star sign: *breathes deeply* taurus sun, aries moon, scorpio rising, leo midheaven. i am The Biggest Astrology HoeTM

height: 5′6″ but i say im 5′7″

what’s your middle name? elizabeth

put your spotify on shuffle. what are the first 6 songs that popped up?

supercut - lorde

i wanna get better - bleachers

so much better - legally blonde soundtrack

crazy in love - kadebostany

raise hell - dorothy

blow your mind (mwah) - dua lipa

grab the book nearest you and turn to page 23. what’s line 17?

“jane should therefore make the most of every half hour in which she can command his attention.”

ever had a poem or song written about you? not like... legit ones?? like chris writes me little songs all the time but they’re like “lola lola sweet like cherry cola” and other dum stuff which makes me laugh

when was the last time you played air guitar? LITERALLY 3 HRS AGO DURING LUNCH

who is your celebrity crush? harry “i own lola’s ass” styles

what’s a sound you hate? love?

do you believe in ghosts? how about aliens? i strongly believe in ghosts and aliens. im all about that paranormal bullshit

do you drive? if so, have you ever crashed? 1) yes i drive i’ve been driving for like 2 and a half yrs now WILD 2) ok... like 2 weeks after i got my permit i got in a fender bender but not since then lmao

what was the last book you read? much ado about nothing for my lit class which technically isn’t a book it’s a play but... DETAILS

do you like the smell of gasoline? idk i’ve never really thought about it??

what was the last movie you saw? in the movie theaters, battle of the sexes. and i watched the notebook at my boyfriend’s yesterday

what’s the worst injury you’ve ever had? i flipped over the handlebars of my razor scooter in 6th grade and broke my left wrist which sucked bc i’m lefthanded and i couldn’t write any of my homework

do you have any obsessions right now? all i want for christmas is you (extra festive version), stranger things season 2, jane austen novels, starbucks holiday drinks, harry styles, why acoustic version by sabrina carpenter, making super specific spotify playlists, legally blonde !!!!

do you tend to hold grudges against people who have done you wrong? YES typical taurus bitch i will hate u until im lowered into my grave

in a relationship? yes i’ve been dating my boyf chris for nine months tomorrow and he’s adorable i love him so much im SOFT

what loser? idk what this means but im a loser so yeah

#prev. lola1x1s #ok me

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un-becomingme · 8 years

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I think you are the type of girl I would love to take out on a date. I would do something special for you. First I would get a projector and hook it up to a power source. Then I would hang up a large white sheet to some trees. Next I would hook up speakers to the power source. Finally I would provide popcorn and drinks and other snacks. We would then spend the day and night talking and getting to know each other and watching our favorite movies on our own personal drive in movie theater. :)

um ok 😭 i'm obsessed. where art thou anon with white sheet and movie projector?! Can you bring reece's cups? Causeeee I'm sold.

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rokurookajima · 8 years

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i’m gonna do an olivia and answer all these questions just because

DAISY: How old were you when you had your first kiss?

depends which one you wanna count as first. first technically, i was 15 but it was an accident. first intentional but not really desired i was 16. first good kiss was when i was 19

CARNATION: If I handed you a concert ticket right now, who would you want to be the performer?

uh i really don’t ever go to concerts bc im pretty unexciting, but i’ll basic and say honestly lana del rey JASMINE: What color looks best on you?

black, gray, and army green look good on everybody am i right FOXGLOVE: Name three facts about your family? uhhh my dad was a theater major in college (this is a very weird and unexpected fact if u know my dad lmao), my mom wanted to be a cop in high school (this is also a very weird and unexpected fact if u know my mom), we’ve always been closer to family friends than my parents actual extended families so i have cool godparents instead of a cool aunt and uncle and god siblings instead of cousins ALLIUM: What’s the best thing you can cook?

i can definitely make eggs in various fashions ORANGE BLOSSOM: If you could pick the gender and appearance of your child, would you?

i don’t think so, but i also don’t rlly want children so i guess its not something that matters to me theoretically?? CALLA LILY: If you died right now, what song would you want to play at your funeral?

annabeth will sing in the arms of the angels POINSETTIA: Favorite holiday dish?

dude all of it!!! i love thanksgiving food so much, all of it piled on one plate and u just bash on it all together it’s glorious OXLIP: Would you ever get into a long distance relationship?

i guess technically both of my relationships were long distance in some ways?? my first bf was a completely online relationship, and my recent ex boyfriend lived an hour away from me (which i didn’t rlly consider long distance bc i drive a lot anyway) but then lived in chicago the last couple months of our relationship for an internship. honestly i wouldn’t do another completely online relationship probably ever, and i wouldn’t want to have another person i date move out of state. but it was rlly no problem when he lived an hour away from me, like it was a little inconvenient but not bad, so i’d be ok with getting into another relationship like that PRIMROSE: Favorite kind of soup?

i’m rlly not a big fan of soup??? but i like a good tomato bisque sometimes, like the really creamy kind DAFFODIL: What’s the most thoughtful present you’ve ever received?

hm im not rlly sure...i feel like i’ve received a lot of thoughtful presents, esp from friends. bc like my parents usually get me useful things or things i told them i wanted when they asked?? but friend gifts are usually a lot more personal? which is very cool. so wow this is a copout answer but i feel like all the gifts i’ve gotten from friends are the most thoughtful!! ROSE: Are you currently in love with someone?

ha wow i wish being in love was the best feeling in the world. but no. and it’ll probably be a while before i am again AMSONIA: Would you ever become a vegan?

i once had a dream where i told someone that i wanted to be a vegan just because i really love labels, and honestly that said so much about my personality PEONY: What’s your favorite hot beverage?

coffee is my blood. i also like hot chai lattes sometimes!

TULIP: For your birthday, what kind of cake do you ask for?

at my office, they get a dessert for everybody’s birthdays, and i usually ask for pumpkin pie, which is not cake but similar MYRTLE: Do you like going on airplanes?

yeah its pretty cool, i like going to airports more than i like going on planes tho i think. i always find those kind of transient places rlly cool, like airports, big highway gas stations, train platforms/subway stations HIBISCUS: Did you ever play an instrument? If so what?

yeh i took guitar lessons for a rlly long time back in the day, and still play sometimes ZINNIA: Who was your best friend when you were six years old?

gabrielle!! and she hasn’t been able to get rid of me yet POPPY: What color was your childhood home?

like the outside? idk about the apartment we lived in when i was first born, but the first place i remember was a blue townhouse we lived in for a year or two when i was like 3?? HYDRANGEA: Starbucks order?

depends on the day bc unfortunately i get starbucks way too often bc there’s one in the library at school and thats what i live off of. most of the time i get iced coffee w soy milk. but man i get peppermint mochas whenever they’re offered bc wow those are so good the best seasonal drink VIOLET: Do you like where you’re from?

yeah i really do. i like ohio a lot as a state, theres a lot of cool cities. the actual city i lived most of my life is a pretty shitty place and i’d never want to be stuck there for the rest of my life. but it wasn’t the worst place to grow up, it had some stuff in it, and its rlly convenient to get to a lot of bigger better cities in a reasonable drive. and theres some small charming things about that city, like the old money houses and places that i like out of nostalgia LOCUST: What was your favorite book as a child?

i was one of those weird kids who was really obsessed with the warriors series....i loved those dang cats so dang much RHODODENDRON: What’s the scariest dream you’ve ever had?

i’m not rlly sure..usually when i have scary dreams, they just have a really scary feeling, but not a distinguishable scary reason or plot i guess? like the most terrified i’ve ever felt in a dream was literally like a five second flash of a man standing in front of a fire, licking blood off of his hands, and laughing maniacally?? like i couldn’t tell you why that was so terrifying or what it meant but it was the most fear i’ve ever felt in a dream. i think i was 12?? QUEEN ANNE’S LACE: Would you rather carve pumpkins or wrap presents?

wow i haven’t carved a pumpkin in so long, so i think that!! MAGNOLIA: Favorite kind of candy?

i don’t rlly like candy all that much, im much more of a salty person than sweet. but i guess i prefer sour candy to anything else ASTER: Would you rather be cold or hot?

cold, cold is always better than being miserably hot wowie MARIGOLD: Do you listen to what’s on the radio?

nah i plug my phone into an aux chord and listen to my own music library HELICONIA: Do you like when it rains?

i love it!!! rainy weather is my favorite. esp like...rainy days in between when its actually raining? like its rlly wet and gray, but the rains taking a break so you can actually go outside. i love that shit AZALEA: What’s a movie you cried while watching?

um wow i’ve definitely cried watching a lot of movies but i think the last time a movie like rlly fucked me up and made me cry way too much was inside out.....and tbh idk if i’ll ever watch that movie again its too real DANDELION: Do you think you’re important?

thats......such a question. like i know its a bad answer but not really. i know i should, but i don’t see a reason to so :/

#ask meme #about me #personal #one man harp band

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purplesurveys · 5 years

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What were you doing an hour ago? I was driving home from UP. I wanted to stay longer since I hadn’t been to school in a month and I missed the environment, but I also wanted to beat the traffic so I drove out by like 4 PM. When did you get up today? 3 AM. I had a calltime of 6 AM for my internship (we ran a media event today) and whenever I have a ridiculously early calltime, I always make myself wake up a couple of hours beforehand so that I have time to actually wake up and not end up cranky. I dunno if that makes sense but it works for me. Is there anyone that could make your day if they showed up at your house? Right now not really. I’d rather have my me time for the rest of the day haha. Do you live west of Ohio? Nope. Do you live east of Colorado? Anddddd nope.

Does your middle name begin with a A, M, or S? My maiden name starts with an A. How old was the last person you rode in a car with? I last rode a van with a bunch of journalists who probably ranged from 20 to 30 somethings. What color was the last vehicle you were in? It was white. Do you have big plans for the weekend? Not big but I’ll be pretty busy this weekend. Saturday morning I’ll be part of a journalism workshop hosted by my org, followed by Pride March in the afternoon. By Sunday, I’ll be ushering in my university’s graduation because I want to see my good friends who will be graduating :’( How many of your top friends have tattoos? How long have you lived at your current residence? 11 years this August. How long has your ex been your ex? She was my ex for around six months before we got back together. When was the last time you were up at 5am? Today. Ugh. Have you ever kissed your #4? What was the last movie you saw in theaters and who did you go with? Rainbow’s Sunset, with Gabie. When was the last time you went bowling? Not sure, but it was the earlier half of 2019. How about swimming? Start of June. Have you ever been to the Grand Canyon? No. The Eiffel Tower? No. The Great Wall of China? No. When you go fishing, do you make someone else get the fish off the hook? I don’t go fishing. How old were you in 1999? A year. How many funerals have you been to this year? None, and my parents don’t make us go to funerals anyway. But more than that, fortunately no one we know has died this year so that’s a better reason why I haven’t gone to one lol. When was the last time you spent a night stargazing? Yikes. I don’t really get to do that in the city... Are you taller than 5'6"? Hahahaha, nope. No one in my immediate family got the height gene. What was the last thing you cooked? HAHAHA Who were the last three people to call you? Gabie, my mom. They’re the only people I’d answer a call for, plus Angela. What were you doing last night at 10 PM? I was finishing up my late late dinner before heading to bed. Did you go to daycare when you were little? Not a daycare, but my mom used to take me to Sta. Lucia and would leave me in an indoor kiddie playground service while she would do the groceries. I have very hazy memories of it, but they’re memories that I remember nonetheless and I’m glad to see that the place is still standing strong with the same logo and same setup. Do you have a favorite pillow you always sleep with? Nah. I just need a pillow that I use for hugging and I can fall asleep fast. When was the last time you slept in someone else's bed? Last Friday. Are there any candles in the room you're in? Yep, but I don’t think we’ve ever used them. My mom probs just wants them around for decor. If you turn around, what is behind you? A window and a pair of curtains. Would you dye your hair hot pink for $50? I’d need to be paid much more for that hahaha. Have you ever had someone like you that you didn't like back? A little bit, yeah. Do you know what you'd have been named had you been born the opposite sex? No. My parents said they never thought about that chance. Do you have any step or half siblings? I don’t. What is your profile song right now? OMG, ok so this isn’t a thing anymore but I used to be OBSESSED with embedding playlists onto my blogs. One song I can sharply remember putting on my Multiply account was Rihanna’s Rude Boy WHEN I WAS 11. No idea what it had been about but it was bopping hard as fuuuuuck, so off to my blog it went. What is your #1's profile song? How many people have you kissed in the last 48 hours? Just one. The last week? All the same. The last month? Stilllll the one. Do you regret any of them? No. What would you do if your #2 showed up on your doorstep this very minute? If you switch 'e' with 'a', 'n' with 'c', & 'l' with 'x' what's your name? Robyc? When is the next time you will see your #3? Would you ever visit a nude beach? For funsies, sure. When was the last time someone gave you a compliment? I don’t remember. Maybe during the weekend. Do you take any prescription meds? I don’t. What happens if you don't take them? What color is your underwear? Yellow. Who was the last person you dreamt about? I don’t remember most of my dreams. Where did you get the shirt you are wearing? I’m pretty sure it’s a hand-me-down from my mom. Where was the last place you spent more than $50? I never spend that much in one go. Where is your favorite place to be kissed other than the usual place? Hair, neck, shoulders.

Do you hate getting hickeys? Noooooooooooo. Who was the last person to hug you? Kim, when he left earlier. Are there any buttons on the clothes you're wearing? No buttons. How about zippers? Nope. What percent of your day includes music? Probably like 30%. It’s part of my drive going to and from home. Have you had any fruit today? As surprising as it sounds, yeah. We had a buffet for lunch earlier and one of the dishes was fish fillet topped with mango. Now I hate fruits, but I didn’t have breakfast today and I was hungry and willing to eat ANYTHING. Who is on your mind right now? No one. Just thinking about how hungry I am now lmao. Are your fingernails painted? Never are. Do you keep a diary/journal? I treat this as one so I’ll count this as one, so yes. In how many years will you be thirty? Nine years. I’m gonna be enjoying my 20s for a while. Do you set your marshmallows on fire when you roast them? I don’t really get the chance to roast them. Do you prefer your tea sweetened or unsweetened? Sweetened. Have you ever dated someone whose name began with 'D'? Their surname starts with a D. Have you ever kissed someone whose name began with 'K'? No. Have you ever hugged someone whose name began with 'E'? Nope.

What scent is your favorite perfume/cologne? It’s sweet and fruity. Have you showered today? Yes, the first thing I did this morning. When was the last time you took a nap? Mmmmmm it’s been a while. I think it was two Saturdays ago. What are you plans after this? More surveys. Got out of work early today so I wanna take advantage of the free time haha.

#survey #surveys

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