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spencerspecifics · 4 years ago

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Hey, can I request something with moreid? maybe their first official date?

Hi! Thanks so much for your request :) Apologies as it took a bit (work and school do b kicking my ass tho.) here is my oneshot drabble of their first date! No TW needed, but this does get very angsty!

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Diner Date

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The diner was a small local joint, the only one open 24/7. That’s how they found themselves there, at 12:42 a.m. After solving their latest case in St.Helens (a small town on the outskirts of Portland), Spencer had mentioned he was hungry- though the rest of the team wasn’t in the mood to go get food, they’d rather pass out in their respective hotel rooms.

Spencer, however, had forgotten to eat lunch that day. So he was starving, and he didn’t care if he had to make the trek to a nearby restaurant alone or not- though he’d rather not. If he could, he would ignore his hunger as a whole and get to his hotel room, too- he was just as tired as everyone else. And he wasn’t a fan of venturing out to get food. It was dark and cold, and he’d rather have someone else’s company, instead of sitting at a table alone. But he wasn’t about to ask- the entire team was exhausted, just like him, Rossi and Dave had made their way up to their rooms first, no time for small talk. J.J. and Prentiss stayed behind to speak for a minute in the hotel lobby, before promptly doing the same.

It was just him and Derek in the lobby of the Best Western after a moment, Spencer didn’t mind. He liked Derek’s company. “You heading up?” Derek asked him, already glancing to the elevators that J.J. and Prentiss had disappeared into moments earlier, as if he wanted to desperately head that way, too.

Spencer shook his head, “No- I’m hungry, I’m gonna go find somewhere to get some food.” “Cool, I’ll come with.” Derek spoke easily, as if he wasn’t one missed step away from passing out right there in front of him. Spencer fidgeted with his messenger bags strap that sat across his shoulder. “You don’t have to come with me, you should get some rest.” He said as he looked to the elevator doors as some sort of signal that it really was okay for Derek to go, he didn’t owe him anything.

Derek shook his head, “No way, man. C’mon, let’s go. It’s way too late to go anywhere alone.”

That’s how they found themselves in the diner at an ungodly hour of the night. The diner itself was small, reserved, their small neon sign that said ‘open’ flickered on and off at random. The only other people there were the waitress that had seated the two, the cook in the back; and an old man at the counter top bar, sipping away on a mug of coffee.

They had been seated in a simple booth by the front window, giving them a view of the empty street ahead that was illuminated by a few nearby streetlights. Spencer leaned back once he made contact with the booths seat, practically melting into the plastic. It wasn’t comfortable, but he was tired. And the fatigue from the stress of the day had finally caught up with him.

Derek looked fondly at him for only a second, before forcing himself to look down at the laminated menu in front of him. Now wasn’t the time to be so obviously crushing on his friend, though it was painfully obvious how he felt- and it had been for while. Even Hotchner realized something was up after a bit, thankfully he had said nothing besides a series of strong glances occasionally when Derek and Spencer were a bit too close, a bit too friendly. His way of saying “focus on the case, not on him”. And Spencer seemed oblivious as ever. Totally unaware of how infatuated Derek was with him. Derek was grateful, he wouldn’t know what to do if Spencer knew, he would probably hide in shame for the rest of his life- have Garcia delete him from every database ever and have him start over from scratch.

Okay, that’s a tad bit too dramatic for Derek’s taste. But still, he wouldn’t know what to do if Spencer knew. It would rock the foundation of their relationship to the core, for better or for worse, Derek didn’t want to venture to find out. He wanted to keep things the same. He was happy to just be with Spencer whenever, at work in the bullpen, on their shared off time, and right now; at this old small town diner.

“You tired?” Derek asked after a beat of silence, looking up to see Spencer resting his head on one of his arms that he had propped up onto the table, the other was resting on the table completely, fingers fidgeting with the sleeve of his navy blue cardigan.

“Yeah, a little.” Spencer said sleepily, sitting up a bit straighter as the waitress made her way by to take their orders.

The waitress was an older woman, black hair pinned up in a bun with heavy eyeliner rimmed around her eyes and lipstick done in a similar fashion. Her nametag simply read as ‘Sue’.

“What can I get you boys?” She asked them casually, she didn’t seem tired or annoyed with their presence. She almost seemed upbeat, like they had come in during her morning shift instead of the late night hour they had arrived at.

“Coffee, please.” Spencer said, giving her brief eye contact before looking back down at the menu. Sue turned to look at Derek expectantly, “Uh- water for me, thanks.” He said. She just nodded, walking off towards the kitchen to fulfill their simple order.

“Coffee?” Derek asked Spencer once she was out of earshot, “Hm?” Spencer mumbled in response, still scanning the menu. Derek knew that Spencer didn’t need to continue reading by that point, the kid was a speed reading demon. Spencer was just trying to keep himself awake by reading the words on the menu in front of him over and over again.

“You sure it’s a good idea to be drinking coffee at,” Derek stopped to look down at the watch on his wrist, “12:42 in the morning?” Spencer just shrugged as he looked up to make eye contact with Derek, who was as equally tired. “I’ll still be able to sleep.” Derek scoffed lightly, like hell spencer would be able to. It usually took him a while to sleep anyways, as evident by the eye bags that always seemed apparent on the mans face.

“You should take better care of yourself.” Derek said simply, not even realizing the full affect of his words. It was just the main thought in his head that had always stuck with him. Spencer always put other things before him. Whether it be the case they were working on, his coworkers, or even his mom. Spencer needed to learn that he was equally as important as all of the above.

Spencer’s weary eyes snapped back up to Derek’s at an almost record speed, he was surprised. He didn’t expect that coming from Derek, especially not now. Spencer’s mind was tangled in this moment, he was tired, drained, and taken aback by what Derek said. So when he spoke, it wasn’t eloquent, it wasn’t put together. It was one simple word; “Why?”

Derek returned his question with a simple glance of confusion, a look of; ‘are you serious?’ He was about to speak when Sue returned, a cup of water in one hand, and a mug of coffee in the other. She sent them down in front of their respective people before pulling out her notepad to take their orders, “Are ya ready to order?”

“Actually, can we have a minute more?” Derek asked her, before Spencer had a chance to change the topic of conversation to greasy diner food orders. Sue nodded casually, tucking her notepad back away into her apron. “Sure, holler me back when you’re ready.” She sauntered back off, to behind the countertop bar, to attend to the old man who needed a refill on his coffee.

Spencer didn’t say anything, instead turning his attention to look out the window onto the vacant and dark street. He didn’t like how it looked, he didn’t like the dark. But he stayed looking out, because he wasn’t sure what was in store for him if he was to look back to Derek and his soft, concerned gaze.

“You need to take better care of yourself because we need you here, we don’t want you burning out.” Derek told him easily, holding the phrase ‘I need you here’ back in his throat. It wasn’t right to say. “You can find ten other individuals just like me in the academy, who are probably better in lots of ways.” Spencer said in his famous ‘matter of fact’ tone. Derek let that go in one ear and out the other, why was Spencer being like this?

“If they’re not you, they’re not better.” Derek replied easily, Spencer didn’t reply, turning from looking out the window to looking to the mug of coffee in front of him. He grabbed three sugar packets from the nearby container sat at the end of their table, ripping them open one by one and pouring the sugar in methodically.

“What’s going on?” Derek asked, voice quieter than it had been before. Spencer crumpled the empty sugar packet that was still between his fingers.

“It just...” Spencer muttered, before grabbing the spoon that came with his drink to stir. He stayed quiet while he worked on the task. He finished, putting the spoon down slowly, before looking back at Derek, whose gaze was laced with concern.

“It gets tiring. Day in, day out. This job.” Spencer explained simply. It was true, the job took a toll on him, and on everyone on the team. They all had their moments of weakness, of anxiety, of pain, of pure fatigue. Derek understood it all too well.

“Are you thinking of hanging it up?” Derek asked Spencer curiously. Spencer shook his head as he dropped the crumpled packet onto the table, switching it for his drink. He raised his head off his hand finally as he started drinking his coffee.

“No. I can’t. This is all I have.” Spencer said, setting his free hand down on the table, the other one was still laced around the handle of his mug. Derek looked down at the hand resting freely on the table.

What he wouldn’t give to grab it, hold onto it and tell Spencer he had so much more than just the job. He had a family. He had the entire teams adoration and love. He had them. He especially had Derek.

“You know you have more than just the work.” Derek said blankly, he was pointing out the obvious. And he knew Spencer knew that. Spencer sighed, a sign of defeat as he raised his coffee cup back up to his lips. He took a long draw before responding, “I know.. I’m sorry. I don’t know why I’m in this mood. Sometimes it’s just...”

“Too much?” Derek provided an answer, Spencer nodded. “Yeah, too much. I’m sorry.” He apologized, unsure of what else he could say. Derek just gave him a soft, small smile, before doing what his mind had told him to do, he rested his hand on top of Spencer’s. “It’s okay, pretty boy. You let me know when you feel like this though, please. I want to help.”

Spencer didn’t pull his hand away, he instead just stared down at Derek’s hand that was ontop of his. If Derek didn’t know any better, he would swear that Spencer started blushing. But he shook that thought out of his head as quickly as it came. It’s just the lighting in the diner being weird, it’s the fact Spencer’s head was now angled down; hair falling into his face, blocking his eyes and creating a weird shadow on his cheeks.

That what that was, it wasn’t Spencer blushing. It couldn’t be that.

“Can’t believe this started over me ordering coffee.” Spencer said, his attempt at cracking a joke to change the atmosphere around them. Derek smiled, “Yeah, ‘cause you’re a maniac for ordering coffee this late. I know for a fact you won’t be able to sleep after this.” He said, pulling his hand off of Spencer’s. He didn’t want to, but the moment of softness around them had passed. He couldn’t leave his hand there forever, even if it’s what he wanted most.

“I will be able to-“ Spencer started protesting, Derek shook his head; “Nuh-Uh, no way. You’re gonna end up asleep at 4 in the morning, wake up at 7, and complain on the jet the entire way home.” Spencer opened his mouth, as if to protest again. But shut it almost immediately after, Derek was right.

“Doesn’t matter, I’ll steal your blanket on the way back.” He replied, as if that was the best he could do. “That’s harsh, Reid, real harsh. Whatever will I do without my blanket?” Derek faked a pouting face, Spencer rolled his eyes as he flicked the crumpled up sugar packet at Derek’s general direction on the other side of the booth, missing him by a few inches as it landed by Derek’s side.

“C’mon, let’s order something, I’m hungry.”

They ordered, Derek just got toast, he wasn’t that hungry. Spencer, however, ordered a BLT, and when it came to their table; he practically inhaled in within a few minutes.

“You gonna come up for air anytime soon?” Derek joked as he finished off one of his two slices of toast, the blush rose in Spencer’s face again. Derek pretended it wasn’t there.

“ ‘m hungry..” was all he mumbled out in response, before taking another bite that was way too big to fit in any normal humans mouth. Derek watched him fondly, this time not breaking his gaze to look down at the menu. Spencer was gorgeous, in his mind.

It didn’t matter that he was shoving his face into a sandwich, it didn’t matter it was nearing 1 a.m. at a diner in nowhere, population zero. It didn’t matter that they both had bags under their eyes, that they were both sleep deprived; it didn’t matter that Spencer’s hair was ruffed up, or that his clothes were wrinkled and awkwardly framing his small body. Derek couldn’t look away. Everything he could ever want in a person was in front of him, handsome, smart, kind, caring, Spencer.

Derek ignored everything inside of him that was telling him to just say it, instead turning to chuckle at how Spencer looked like a chipmunk, stuffing food in his mouth.

“If you eat too fast, you’ll feel sick.” Derek told him. Spencer shook his head in response, swallowing the food in his mouth before responding, “That only happens if someone has an acid reflux problem.” “You’re gonna get one, at this rate.”

Spencer just rolled his eyes at Derek while he wiped his mouth with a napkin.

Derek watched Spencer continue on, he either didn’t notice or didn’t care- he was just focused on his sandwich.

They finished their meals, Derek set down a 20 dollar bill and a 10 dollar bill at the table, which covered both of their orders. Spencer looked disappointed, almost upset. He didn’t like when others did things for him, it’s a habit he needed to unlearn.

“I brought you out here, I can pay.” He spoke, reaching for his wallet that sat in his cardigans front pocket. Derek waved him off as they both slowly stood up from the booth, “Not necessary.” Derek so desperately wanted to add on ‘you can pay next time’ but he couldn’t. He didn’t want to push his luck.

This was the farthest he had ever gotten with Spencer, the soft energy they had created within the diner, the hands resting ontop of each other. He couldn’t ruin it, he couldn’t.

They made their way back to the hotel, which was in walking distance of the restaurant. It was colder than before, though, and Spencer had forgotten how chilly it could be- the only secondary layer he had covering his body was his thin cardigan. It wasn’t long before he started shivering on their way back.

Derek noticed almost immediately, how Spencer wrapped his arms around himself in a feeble attempt to conserve body heat.

“Here, stop.” Derek stopped them from continuing forward on the sidewalk, raising his hand up as a signal. He wasn’t gonna let Spencer freeze, though this was a pitifully cliche moment. Derek pulled his thick coat off his shoulders, handing it over to Spencer, who shook his head in response; “No, no. You keep that, Derek. I’ll be fine.” “Spencer, we have four more blocks before we get to the hotel, you’re gonna be freezing your ass off by then.”

“I can’t take your jacket-“ “You’re not, I’m giving it to you. Now get it on.” Derek told him, his voice not sounding stern, just intense. He meant what he was saying. Spencer breathed out a puff of air, before finally compromising and taking the jacket from Derek’s hand. He slid the large coat over his thin frame, the jacket was way too big on him.

Derek didn’t care, Spencer looked beautiful to him. In his oversized jacket, it just made Derek’s mind race faster. God, he was absolutely losing it, and over what? His work crush. His hopeless work crush that was too much of an oblivious genius to realize.

“Let’s go,” Derek said, continuing them on forward before he could say something he’d regret. They continued down the sidewalk, illuminated by the small passing streetlights.

“Derek?” Spencer asked him curiously once they were inside the hotel, Derek looked over at him, now he could see him in better lighting.

Spencer’s nose and cheeks were flushed red from the cold, Derek’s oversized jacket still wrapped tightly around him, as if it was a light preserver.

“Yeah?” He asked him nonchalantly, as they continued through the lobby and to the elevator.

“Thanks for coming with me. I didn’t wanna go alone.” Spencer admitted sheepishly, looking down at his hands instead of Derek as they walked. They got to the elevator, and Derek reached over, pressing the button that illuminated softly once he had touched it.

They waited for the elevator to reach them in silence.

Once they were on the elevator, no words were exchanged. Derek didn’t need to know Spencer’s floor number, as it was the same as his. They were both too tired, for different and same reasons simultaneously.

The elevator whirred, propelling them up to their floor. Then it dinged, alerting them they were there. Derek and Spencer stepped out together into the empty, lit up hallway.

“Here,” Spencer mumbled as he pulled Derek’s jacket off his body, he had to do this now before he forgot all together, or else he’d end up bringing it home with him. Derek took the jacket wordlessly, carrying it in his arms, he didn’t know what he could say.

They started off in separate directions, Derek’s room was down the hall to the right, and Spencer’s was down the hall to the left. They departed slowly, Derek moving at a tiresome pace. His mind was slowly filling up with thoughts, all of Spencer, and all of what transpired this night.

Spencer made his way down his own hall, before stopping all together, turning slowly to watch Derek’s frame slowly continue away.

Spencer had to speak now, or else he’d never get the chance again; “Hey, Derek?” He called out, not too quietly. He grimaced at that, he should be quieter, after all, his coworkers rooms were right in front of him.

Derek turned around, “Yeah?” He asked curiously, walking to approach Spencer.

Spencer decided not to say his next sentence loudly, instead he waited for Derek to reach him. “Can we do this again?” “...Do what?” Derek asked, a bit confused as he neared him- and the last thing he wanted to do was assume, get his hopes up, psych himself out over something seemingly impossible.

“Get food together- I like being with you... I’d like to do it again.” Derek stayed quiet for a moment as his mind processed all Spencer said, “...So, you’re thinking... like a date..?” He asked, just wanting to clarify.

Spencer’s face blushed scarlet, this time lighting and shadows couldn’t be the excuse as to why, he nodded slowly; “Yeah, like a date.”

Derek nodded, “Yes, I’d like that.”

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57 notes · View notes

linskywords · 4 years ago

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criminal-minds-fanfiction wrote a bunch of questions for authors that you’re supposed to let people ask you, buuuut I felt like answering all of them instead of doing my actual job this afternoon. 😄 Here we go:

1) How old were you when you first starting writing fanfiction?

Like 25 maybe? I started writing about a year after I started reading it. I had a fanfiction-deprived adolescence, y’all.

2) What fandoms do you write for and do you have a particular favourite if you write for more than one?

The hockey boys pulled me in years ago and they haven’t let me go. I do sometimes write other things: I almost always participate in Yuletide, and I’ve actually written a bunch of Animorphs fic under a different name (ask me if you want to see it!). Mostly hockey RPF, though.

3) Do you prefer writing OC’s or reader inserts? Explain your answer.

Haha neither. Well, I guess OC’s, if I had to choose -- I don’t read or write reader inserts. But I tend to keep OC’s for original fiction.

4) What is your favourite genre to write for?

I was very confused about fic having genres before I realized this was probably referring to the genre of the canon works. Um...sports. :D

5) If you had to choose a favourite out of all of your multi chaptered stories, which would it be and why?

Don’t make me choose my favorite child. Um, probably the first wolfverse story -- I don’t know if it’s the best one, but I’m very grateful to it for starting the ‘verse!

6) If you had to delete one of your stories and never speak of it again, which would it be and why?

None of them, if that’s an option. If I really had to choose...probably the Kirk/Spock fic I never finished even after uploading it to AO3 and promising to finish it this time. I still want to finish it!! But it would be the first to go.

7) When is your preferred time to write?

I don’t have a strong preference. Afternoon/evening. I like having multi-hour blocks, and I use the Forest app to keep me off my phone while I do it.

8) Where do you take your inspiration from?

Plot bunnies come from all over the place: random thoughts, memes, real-life conversations, suggestions from other fandom people. I tend to have a pretty strong “THIS IS A STORY I WANT TO WRITE” response when something grabs me the right way.

9) In your xxx fic, what’s your favourite scene that you wrote?

Haha this is probably why I’m not supposed to just answer all of these in order. XD I’ll answer for my current WIP: the scene where Geno kisses Sid for the first time. So soft. So angsty. 😈 (My own story has cursed me to love Geno. I am doomed.)

10) In your xxx fic, why did you decide to end it like that? Did you have an alternative ending in mind?

In general: I know how my stories are going to end when they start. Sometimes it does evolve a bit as I write. One thing I’d like to play with is including more of the main characters being together at the end of the story, instead of ending it at the moment when they get together; the latter makes sense from a tension perspective, but I’ve been finding when I read lately that I want more of the happy times at the end, so I’m going to try to move in that direction.

11) Have you ever amended a story due to criticisms you’ve received after posting it?

Only for typos, I think.

12) Who is your favourite character to write for? Why?

Ooooh. Either Patrick Kane or Jonathan Toews. There’s something so compelling to me about Patrick’s fanon voice. And every love interest in every original story I try to write is Jonny.

13) Who is your least favourite character to write for? Why?

I...don’t really write about characters I don’t like? I wish Auston Matthews would shave his mustache.

14) How did you come up with the title for the xxx? - You can ask about multiple stories.

About fifty percent of the titles I come up with are desperate scrambles because I’ve got nothing. The other fifty percent I have a perfect song lyric for from the start.

15) If you write OC’s, how do you decide on their names?

I only write OC’s in original fiction, but: I’ve been phonebanking lately, and I’ve been writing down all the good names I come across. The best so far is someone with the last name Quackenboss.

16) How did you come up with the idea for xxx?

MAGIC.

17) Post a line from a WIP that you’re working on.

Oh...oh no. Um.

“It doesn’t matter what he was thinking about. His knot popped; that’s the important thing.”

Some of you can probably guess what that’s about. :)

18) Do you have any abandoned WIP’s? What made you abandon them?

Mostly on my computer. I have a lot of beginnings of stories I haven’t finished yet; many of them I’ll probably go back to. I tend not to post things until I’m done or close to done with them. (That one Star Trek fic being an exception. Mea culpa.)

19) Are there any stories that you’ve written that you’d really love to do a sequel to?

YES. The 1988 timer one and the 1988 story where Patrick’s a girl who sneaks onto the Blackhawks in disguise. I’d love to do a Bennguin version of both of those.

20) Are there any stories that you wished you’d ended differently?

Hm. Some of them I think I rushed a little. More Than I Could Ever Promise, I think it needs a good old-fashioned battle scene in the mountains at the end to really round out the plot.

21) Tell me about another writer(s) who you admire? What is it about them that you admire?

Have I mentioned astolat? What, only two or three hundred times? I should mention her again, then. Give me that woman’s ability to plot. Inject it into my veins.

22) Do you have a story that you look back on and cringe when you reread it?

Haha. I often have slightly cringy moments in my old stories. You Made My Life an Adventure, I definitely didn’t really know what I was doing yet...

23) Do you prefer listening to music when you’re writing or do you need silence?

I usually listen to music.

24) How do you feel about writing smutty scenes?

Turned on.

25) Have you ever cried whilst writing a story?

Yes. The sequel to My Heart Forgets to Beat.

26) Which part of your xxx fic was the hardest to write?

The Sid/Geno wolfverse story I’m working on now is maybe the hardest thing I’ve ever written. The language barrier is such a new challenge for me.

27) Do you make a general outline for your stories or do you just go with the flow?

I don’t formally outline, but I tend to have a sense of the major plot beats. One reason I love writing fic is that the plot and world tend to be straightforward enough for that. I have a lot more trouble doing that with original fiction.

28) What is something you wished you’d known before you started posting fanfiction?

This will radically reduce the amount of time I spend writing original fiction.

29) Do you have a story that you feel doesn’t get as much love as you’d like?

Like You Have a Secret I think is less read than some of the others because it’s het, but I really love it. Similarly, some of my stories that are inspired by other works (Tangled, Doctor Who, The Giver) tend to be read less because people think they need to know the source material, when really I deviate from the source material so much it’s not important.

30) In contrast to 29 is there a story which gets lots of love which you kinda eye roll at?

Huh. Probably not. I’m definitely surprised when some stories take off -- Kinda Narrows It Down I wrote pretty quickly, on a whim, and I was surprised by the extent to which it resonated with people. Turns out lots of people think Tyler was coming out in that tweet. XD

31) Send me a fic recommendation and I’ll post it for my followers to see! (The asker is to send the rec not the answerer)

Ooh. Ignoring the terms of this question, but: I just read this TK/Patty story and loooved it. It’s a different take on werewolves than the one I use in wolfverse, and it’s super compelling:

https://archiveofourown.org/works/24029188

32) Are any of your characters based on real people?

Hahahahahaha. (I mean...less so than you might think.)

33) What’s the biggest compliment you’ve gotten?

I absolutely love it when people write screaming flaily responses to my fic. Also anytime anyone says that they’ve been having a tough time and my story was exactly what they needed. Maybe my favorite was the responses to More Than I Could Ever Promise that told me it read like a novel; that meant a lot to me right then.

34) What’s the harshest criticism you’ve gotten?

Fandom is amazing; people almost never give me concrit. I did have someone ask once if I randomly chose when to stop writing and just ended my stories there. I was pretty offended, since of course that’s not true at all, but I can see where they were coming from: my stories tend to wrap up after the characters get together, and sometimes there’s a lot of potential story left to tell at that point. But stories have to end sometime.

35) Do you share your story ideas with anyone else or do you keep them close to your chest?

I tend to share them! I find other people’s enthusiasm to be strongly motivating, and sometimes people have awesome suggestions I wouldn’t have thought of.

36) Can you give us a spoiler for one of your WIP’s?

Well, I only have the one. XD Sid...is about to have an important conversation with Mario.

37) What’s the funniest story you’ve written?

Ooh, I’m not sure I’m the write person to answer! No idea, really. My recent TK/Patty is probably pretty funny. Or maybe Quality Time, where Patrick doesn’t understand why he keeps losing track of time when he’s cuddling with Jonny. Anything with a super dumb protagonist, probably.

38) If you could collab with any other writer on here, who would it be? (Perhaps this question will inspire some collabs!) If you’re shy, don’t tag the blog, just name it.

Wow, I have no idea. I’ve never really written a story with someone, so I’m not sure how that would work. I want to say astolat again but honestly I’d be too intimidated.

...no, I’m gonna say astolat. Even if I made a fool of myself I think I would learn a ton.

39) Do you prefer first, second or third person?

Third. For some original stuff I like first person, but third feels right for the hockey boys.

40) Do people know you write fanfiction?

My close friends do. Most of my friends have the vague idea I write fic, but they don’t know my username or anything.

41) What’s you favourite minor character you’ve written?

Patrick Sharp. No question.

42) Song fic - What made you decide to use the song xxx for xxx.

I will legit listen to a new album with a doc open to write down promising lyrics. Titles are HARD, y’all.

43) Has anyone ever guessed the plot twist of one of your fics before you posted it?

I think people guessed where the Tangled fic was going. Though I also liked the guesses that it would be about Patrick’s mullet. XD I don’t really mind when people guess twists -- in the kind of story I write, it’s more about the experience of reading it than about surprise!

44) What is the last line you wrote?

“His parents have always been very respectful of any choices Sid’s wanted to make. They haven’t pried into his private life when he’s tried to set boundaries. But they’re wolves, and they know him a lot better than Jordy does. Sid isn’t going to be able to keep it a secret from them what he’s going through.”

...no guarantee it survives in that form. :D

45) What spurs you on during the writing process?

Getting the story out of my head and into reality! Spoon out that lake, baby.

I also do love the prospect of posting it for people to enjoy and respond to. It’s one of the reasons I find fic so much more rewarding than original fiction, where the timeline to a readership is so much longer.

46) I really loved your xxx fic. If you were ever to do a sequel, what do you think might happen in it?

Things, probably.

47) Here’s a fic title - insert a made up title. What would this story be about?

This exercise might be going off the rails a bit. (If anyone does want to pose this to me, feel free!)

48) What’s your favourite trope to write?

Ooh. Mutual pining. Friends to lovers. Werewolves. :D

49) Can you remember the first fic you read? What was it about?

The first fic I ever, ever read was a random Kirk/Spock one I found through google, and I was like “OMG IS THIS WHAT AROUSAL FEELS LIKE”

50) If you could write only angst, fluff or smut for the rest of your writing life, which would it be and why?

Oh man. Angst, as long as it can have a happy ending. But it just wouldn’t be the same without the smut.

#this was fun #i guess i should go back to work now #fic #fandom #ao3 #tropes #hockey rpf #writing #patrick kane #jonathan toews #sidney crosby #geno malkin #tyler seguin #probably some other people

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toziers · 5 years ago

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can you explain what's going on right now? i keep seeing big IT blogs talking about some discourse or something but i have no idea what they're talking about other than it involves you lol

alright i like. i truly do not like having diScOurSE out in public because i’m not one to air out my dirty laundry 24/7 but seeing as how it was brought into public against my will i feel like the least i can do is clear up the situation for those who’ve been seeing the posts.

i’m putting this under the cut bc it’s long. tws for some biphobia, brief mention of transphobia and, at the end, a rape mention.

so if you don’t know: hi, i’m migz, i’m an it fandom blogger. its okay, i know, its really cool. part of my shtick here is that i like to turn normal thirst tags into works of art for the sake of comedy. perhaps you’ve seen some of my highlights from my “fhg” tag - perhaps your brain has been spared. either way, it became kind of “my thing” around the third or fourth week (mid nov) of me having this blog. at first, i tagged just about every ask i got mentioning the thirst tags with “bill hader” - they had to do with him, so why not tag him? it would draw more like minded people! about two days into that i got a message asking me to tag my nsfw. i am a big dumb idiot, and apologize for not initially doing it. i havent had a following bigger than like 10 in several years and completely spaced on basic etiquette. so by the end of november i was tagging everything applicable with “notsfw” and “bill hader”.

now you’re caught up.

on december 1st i got this message from user billhaderanti:

now i want to start by saying i absolutely was in the wrong here. i didn’t even think about how many people were being subjected to the asks i was getting - especially ones who had no idea they were all jokes. i don’t track the bill hader tag, so it just didn’t even occur to me - that’s ignorance on my part, and to anyone who was subjected to the terrors of me before my tagging system: i am genuinely sorry. i relay the same sentiment in my response, though you can tell i’m on edge.

and they replied:

clearly they Were offended by it but thats.. not the point. at this point, im feeling Really weird about the whole interaction, but still understanding, because again - i GET it. i know my posts are gross - that’s the point. it doesn’t make it excusable, though, which is why i understand why people are offended. so i responded with the only solution i Knew would keep us both safe and happy posting on our own blogs.

so i thought this would be the end of things! i’d been pretty anxious lately already since i’d started to receive anons telling me i was gross and whore-ish for thirst posting in this way (i delete all of those, so if ur thinking about sending one, i guess no one’s stopping you but it won’t be seeing the light of the dashboard). i’m unsure if it was immediately or a few hours later, seeing as how i have a bad concept of time and the post-dates are right on the edge between nov 30 and dec 1, but i went to their blog - because anyone who has been on the internet knows the opportunity to vague post is near irresistible. and...what do ya know

fair! it’s their blog. however i am an emotionally fragile egg girl and immediately got freaked out. the odds that they were the only one who thought this were low. and, again, i’ve been very open on my blog about how important it is to respect boundaries; my posts are absolutely prone to breaking those boundaries people have created for themselves.

so i made my own, semi-vague post, letting my following know (and i’m pretty sure i’d answered asks about it before, but this is going to be long enough w/o me searching those up too) that i understood if they wanted to block me or unfollow or whatever - people need to create their own safe spaces. the tension is pretty clear in the tags, i’m not trying to hide that. i felt that the way this woman slid into my dm’s was pretty abrasive (just my opinion/how it made me personally feel) and i let myself be a lil emotional about it in the tags of my post.

alright! maybe this is the end. maybe we both go our separate ways and post happily on our own blogs... except it’s not the end. later in the day (some of this was happening like 1/2am, so now its Day day, i believe - again, not good w time passage lol)

clearly, i’m upset. my groupchat double checked that i didn’t get too emotional in my response - did i mention im anxious about discourse lol - and apparently.. it did the trick. she didn’t message me again. great. it was over.

at this point, i decided i needed to make an even bigger change. so a few days after i’d calmed down i created an entirely new tag for my thirst posts so if people hadn’t already hidden the notsfw posts or just blocked me outright, they’d have a third option to escape the madness. at this point, id had my blog about 6? weeks, but there were still 2k posts for me to sift through - some of them were completely untagged. i also had to do it post by post, because one of xkits features - the mass re-tagger - was getting blogs deleted for some reason, and i wasn’t going to do that. so i spent a few days going through all 2k+ posts, adding the “fhg” tag.

YEEHAW! a brand new tagging system, no more hopping into the bill hader tag (minus one or two really funny, not super explicit asks, like the bill hader farquaad meme), and, tbf, i’d completely put this woman out of my mind. i don’t seek out drama and do my best to stay in my lane. yesterday, i checked my activity for the first time in awhile since id put out a couple new original posts that had started to get traction and i Love reading tags. i noticed a mutual had @’d me, and realized i havent checked my @’s in...ever, maybe. i see a post from my good pal billhaderanti.

since i dont follow them and never check my @’s, i’d completely missed it. however, once i did see it, i was horrified. id gone through all that fucking work to keep my blog My Blog and also respect everyone’s boundaries and it still hadn’t been enough. i’d been awake for almost 24 hours and went. a little crazy. and i didn’t reply immediately because i just had no words. i sent it to my friends because i... i just wasn’t going to be able to figure it out myself.

there’s a lot to unpack in this post alone, but whatever, i’m gonna put my own grievances with the immaturity of 1. making a callout post to begin with when i’d been nothing but civil 2. making a callout post about something as (in the grand scheme of Life) minor as some tags where i refer to a someone’s genitals as a “whack pack” and 3. making a callout post in such a rude way - aside. at the end, she calls me (and whoever else!) a demonic mlw (man loving woman, we assumed, and then later confirmed with a post further back on her blog).

which - yeah, we started scrolling. at first we were looking for more vague blogs, and then we just...started finding things. billhaderanti is a self proclaimed lesbian separatist, which... fine. but it’s already pretty clear that this woman hates me on some level simply because i am a bi woman (demonic mlw, remember!) which is just. damn man i can’t believe we are still fighting the biphobic fight lol. so the more we scrolled, the more we uncovered - and not just the biphobic / vaguely mtf transphobic things they posted (or put in tags), but we also found that they had their OWN thirst tags. certainly not as hyperbolically comedic as mine, but they were there, talking about his body and his person the same (and, frankly, a bit creepier for other reasons) as mine.

there’s one post in particular that snatched my wig in it’s creepiness - and i say creepiness in the sense that it feels personal. like this woman feels like she knows bill to some degree where she can say these things. my tags have always had a sense of distance, as they’re written for humor. and maybe this particular post was written for comedic purposes, but it doesn’t read that way, and if it WAS, then she has no right to call ME out for MY comic tags and posts.

i’ll let it speak for itself, mostly because i don’t want to read it again.

i also won’t be going through her blog again to find the posts with biphobic and other Interesting:tm: tags because there are plenty and i just really! want to be done with the whole ordeal! her blog is public and i’m sure you can all find it and look to your heart’s content.

feeling a bit feral and a bit pissed off now that we knew the depth of how rotten this woman’s vibes were, a couple of my pals made a post or two similar to what my tag’s are like except turned up to eleven (if possible) - and tagged them with “bill hader” (and notsfw!!). yes, a bit childish, but at this point, the entire situation was childish, and making jokes was truly the only way we were going to get through it. another vague post went up on her blog soon after.

talking down to us, calling us children, and then for whatever reason calling us virgins... whatever, weird post. around this time most of us (est) went to bed, because it was nearing 3 or 4 in the morning.

and then today happened. i woke up fresh and ready for the day after a wonderful 4 hours of sleep and found that jane had made an incredibly intelligent post in response to the situation. i won’t ss it, but i’ll LINK in case you missed it. attached there in the reblog is my own response. i think they can speak for themselves.

after that, things were kind of jumbled, since i wasn’t online a lot and when i was i was Not checking my activity simply because i was afraid of what i’d see. for the most part, it ended up just being support (which i am very grateful to all of you for - it means a lot that you all enjoy my content to any degree).

there was some more vague posting from both “““““sides”””””” of the “““““argument”””””” - mostly just people restating the fact that this is a public space and we should All be aware of how we effect others. i still hadn’t heard directly from billhaderanti, so i assumed we’d all be dropping and disengaging and moving on. i still wasn’t blocked, though, so who really knew what would happen.

eventually, it culminated in this last post. tw for mentions of rape

i’m going to start by saying that

1. there are nearly no teenagers that were involved in this. im turning 23 in january and most of my friends are 20+. maybe one or two are 19.

2. none of us sent any sexually violent asks - most of us didn’t send asks at all. i believe one or two of my friends admitted to sending asks however they assured me their nature wasn’t bad; as far as i know, everyone remained civil in whatever went on (again, unclear to me as to what was being sent; no one was actively posting or talking about it. if billhaderanti wishes to elaborate, they can, but i don’t have anything to put in).

3. before i finish this, i would like to apologize to billhaderanti. as a comedian - not just my stupid tags, i mean in real life, too - i know that humor can hurt. it’s not always funny, it’s not just stupid hahas. sometimes things that are supposed to be jokes just hit people differently and cause bad things. i recognize that. i never meant to trigger you (if you’re reading this) or cause you any severe mental/emotional harm. i apologize for my humor bringing up your trauma, and i never meant for that. regardless of my own thoughts and opinions about the nature of my posts/the thirst tags themselves, they hurt you, and i’m sorry.

anyway, i’m going to wrap this up (i’m bad at endings, what can i say! steven king and i took the same writer’s class!). if you read all this... sorry. i probably won’t be taking any asks about it, because i find the whole “drama” of this to be stupid and rooted in some seriously biphobic issues this fully grown woman has.

tldr; i attempted to contain my blog so this woman could exist and function safely on her blog, but it wasn’t enough for her, so she called me out, and then some of the fandom called Her out for being biphobic and mean and overall just immature about the situation. as of now, she’s yet to block me, though her and her wife have blocked a few of my friends. her wife continues to clown on my friends. this post was made for clarity’s sake. the end, i’m getting a drink.

#discourse #biphobia tw #transphobia tw #rape tw #ok goodbye im done with this im back to #only posting gay clown movie #Anonymous

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stardustdaemon · 5 years ago

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“Fanfiction Writer Asks” Answer all of the ones that apply to you! (☞ﾟ∀ﾟ)☞ you’re welcome!

Finally on desktop so can answer these <3

Got kinda long so putting it under a keep reading but thank you friend <3

1) How old were you when you first starting writing fanfiction?- I think about 11 oh my god

2) What fandoms do you write for and do you have a particular favourite if you write for more than one? - Published i write for bts, MysMes, FFVII and Uncharted but in general. Knb, Free!, Nabari no Ou, YGO (lmao) and a few more. I don’t have a fave

3) Do you prefer writing OC’s or reader inserts? Explain your answer. - OC’s!!! I’m really bad at reader inserts because I struggle with any kind of first person persepctive.

4) What is your favourite genre to write for?- Comedy and Fluff but i do specialise in angst

5) If you had to choose a favourite out of all of your multi chaptered stories, which would it be and why?- The Tones of His Voice, it was super tough to write and kind of personal <3

6) If you had to delete one of your stories and never speak of it again, which would it be and why? - Ap and Book Recs lmao. I kinda hate it but people seem to enjoy it

7) When is your preferred time to write?- NIIIGGGHHTT TTIIIMMMEEE

8) Where do you take your inspiration from?-Anything and everything. It can be interactions i’ve had, stories my friends tell me, scenes from something I’m watching or music.

12) Who is your favourite character to write for? Why?- It’s actually 707 lmao, he’s super dynamic so it’s fun to explore the different sides of him

13) Who is your least favourite character to write for? Why?- AOMINE FUCKING DAIKI. idk why but i can’t get the hang of him >:(

15) If you write OC’s, how do you decide on their names?- I’m a machine for weird and unusual names and i love coming up with names so i tend to come up with the name then build the character around it.

17) Post a line from a WIP that you’re working on.- “Aw come on, don’t be like that, it’s been fourty eight hours since I last saw you, I don’t even get a hug?” Zack pouted, taking slow but short steps towards his best friend who just shook his head, raising an eyebrow as he approached him before suddenly veering to the side, arm swiping to hit Zack across the back with a quick call of “Look, the bus is here.” - It’s a clack au fic <3

18) Do you have any abandoned WIP’s? What made you abandon them? - SO MANY. Mostly because i kind of lost the feel or motivation for them. Or straight up forgot what direction I was going in.

20) Are there any stories that you wished you’d ended differently? - We’re Gonna Be Okay. I wanted it to be longer but I’m afraid of ruining it by doing that.

23) Do you prefer listening to music when you’re writing or do you need silence?- I NEED music to write

24) How do you feel about writing smutty scenes?- Makes me kinda uncomfortabe

25) Have you ever cried whilst writing a story?- oh yes, many a time.

27) Do you make a general outline for your stories or do you just go with the flow? - I sometimes plan it all out but I always end up taking it somewhere completely different xD

28) What is something you wished you’d known before you started posting fanfiction? - Correct format and a better understanding on dialogue to descriptive ratio.

33) What’s the biggest compliment you’ve gotten?- That one of my fics actually gave a lot of hope to someone after a bad breakup.

34) What’s the harshest criticism you’ve gotten?- I haven’t really recieved any

35) Do you share your story ideas with anyone else or do you keep them close to your chest? - Sometimes with a few people but half the time I just write.

36) Can you give us a spoiler for one of your WIP’s? - It’s cliche af.

39) Do you prefer first, second or third person?- a mix between second and third

40) Do people know you write fanfiction?- Yes

41) What’s you favourite minor character you’ve written?- Seijouro Mikoshiba lmao

43) Has anyone ever guessed the plot twist of one of your fics before you posted it?- Yes, but only kinda

44) What is the last line you wrote?- “They stood like that for a while, smiling at the other before Kise threw a finger over his shoulder, mentioning he should head in. Aomine nodded, allowing himself a few more seconds of watching the other before slowly stepping backwards.” I’m back on my aokise bullshit xD

45) What spurs you on during the writing process?- Music and unfortunately usually hyperfixation.

48) What’s your favourite trope to write? - Meet Cute/ Meet Ugly AU’s

49) Can you remember the first fic you read? What was it about? - I think it was a spirit shipping fic called The White Knight

50) If you could write only angst, fluff or smut for the rest of your writing life, which would it be and why? - AANNNNGGSSSTTTT. And mostly because I’m just really good at it xD

#roseusuitta #mao talks #thank you <3

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anastasiaskarsgard · 5 years ago

Text

TO THE ANON THAT ASKED FOR A SMUTTY CHEATER BILL STORY HERE YA GO. I INITIALLY DELETED THE REQUEST BECAUSE I DONT CONDONE CHEATING BUT THEN I THOUGHT, ITS FAN FICTION. NO ONE TAKES IT SERIOUSLY AND IVE GOTTEN A FEW REQUESTS FOR THIS SO HERE YA GO.

Here’s part 1: https://anastasiaskarsgard.tumblr.com/post/188138288236/this-is-a-really-involved-request-so-im-breaking

And here is PART 2

Warning!!! Smut 18+ mature content.

As we pulled into the parking lot, everything hit me at once. I had literally witnessed my dog get murdered, the man I thought was perfect was Satan himself, I have no belongings, I don’t know anyone but Randi here. But then I remembered all the good like I was free, I’m not dead, I have the best friend in the whole world, I already found a job and got paid a lot for basically getting to be near the hottest guy ever and there’s photographic evidence, and literally the world is my oyster. I even get to go to Canada! Hayden Christensen lives there! I look over at Randi and can’t help but laugh when I see her sassy face. She is not a fan of feeling sorry for yourself. “Sorry, I’ll stop. They’re happy tears! I swear! I’m so happy I have you, and we’re going on this adventure. I’m just grateful.”

“Wow. Don’t cry Bitch. You’ll fuck up your make up.” my best friend joked.

I chuckled, and gave her a hug, then stood straight out of the car and let her lead the way to see if everyone had gotten a table together in Mortons.

We found everyone taking their seats. I took the closest open seat next to the photographer and Randi sat between Andy and Bill across from us. I didn’t want to look at Bill and have Randi give me shit, so I read the entire menu like 3 times to avoid looking up. We all ordered, and then Andy had the idea for everyone to introduce themselves:

“Ok since everyone is from all over the place, let’s do a fun little ice breaker. I’ll start. My name is Andy, I’m from the beautiful country of Argentina and I’m a Director as I’m sure you all know, let’s be more original, I know! Name your fear! I’m afraid of drowning.”

“My name is Randi, I’m from Kalamazoo Michigan, I’m an artist and I’m afraid of flying.”

“Ok hi everybody! I’m Bill, I’m from Stockholm Sweden, I’m a human and I’m afraid of being alone.”

I giggled like an idiot, froze and looked over at Randi, who was smiling at me, shaking her head. Dammit.

“My name is Barbara and I’m Andy’s sister, and I am afraid of creepy crawly things.”

“I’m Maria from Brazil, I am photographer and I fear bad lighting and flaky models. Thank goodness for Liv appearing like magic and save the day.” She smiled at me warmly and squeezed my hand.

I felt everyone’s eyes on me, and could feel my heart pounding in my chest. I couldn't bear to look at Bill or Randi, so I stared down in my lap and could feel my face heating up. “I’m Liv from Las Vegas, I guess I’m a model for now and I’m afraid of being a failure, velociraptors, roller coasters, centipedes and public speaking.” I chuckled uncomfortably. I ramble when I’m nervous.

“I’m afraid of velociraptors as well,” Bill laughed. “Jurassic Park ruined me as a child.”

Everyone laughed heartily at Bill’s expense but I felt appreciative of him making my ridiculous fear seem more credible and drawing attention away from my obvious nervousness. I snuck a peek at him and he winked at me playfully.

I didn't know what to think of this beautiful man. My initial reaction to him had been negative. He seemed like every other snobby Hollywood type, complete with crazy girl problems, but as the day progressed, he surprised me over and over with how genuine he seemed to be.

As lunch went on, Randi and Maria were talking technical terms, so Bill and I looked at each other and just smiled and shrugged our shoulders. It wasn't like we were being ignored, just everyone except us was wrapped up in their own conversations. I was content with that too, but then an ice cube flew into my cleavage.

My eyes shot open and I observed a very amused Bill trying to contain his laughter but not doing a very good job.

”I promise I’m not an asshole. I have just been trying to get your attention since we got here. So how long you been in LA?” He asked me like i was the most interesting thing he’d ever encountered.

”What time is it? Less than 24 hours.”

His eyes went wide and he choked on his drink a bit, then began to laugh at himself . ”wow, and you already booked a major job? Who is your agent? Are you an actress or just gorgeous... I mean a model.”

”you are super smooth Bill. I’m kidding! Don’t pout you’ll get wrinkles.” I had to give him some shit. “I don’t have an agent because I don’t have any interest in fame at all.”

He looked impressed by that for some reason. ”so what brought you here?”

”Randi is my best friend, and I needed a change of scenery.” I said making sure to avoid eye contact. I knew I was just being paranoid, but I felt like he could look into my soul, with the intensity he was looking at me with. I’m a terrible liar, so I’m convinced if I look at him, he’ll see I’m not being honest. I didn't want to mention the literal hell id escaped to be here.

I could still feel his gaze on me, and I caught Andy looking between us with an unreadable expression. He's a director so he probably can read people really well.

Shit. I’m probably just being my normal neurotic psycho self. No one probably gives two shits about me, and this is all in my head. These people are famous and successful. I’m just another one of the millions of girls that they encounter in LA.

Maria tapped my shoulder. “Hi honey, can you switch seats with your friend? I want to show some my work?”

I smiled and agreed, but the butterflies in my stomach were going crazy as I took my seat by Bill. He was texting so I got my phone out to play a game or two. Suddenly I felt Bill’s leg press up against mine. I looked over at him, but he just continued with his phone, but was clearly smirking. Just then The food arrived and I was famished, so all other thoughts were abandoned.

“Wow! You eat real food!” Andy exclaimed.

“Oh it’s not fair! Liv has always eaten whatever she wants and doesn’t gain a pound.” Randi whined.

I blushed feeling all the attention on myself again. I wanted to fade into my surroundings like a chameleon. “I like to eat.”

I looked at Bill and he was off his phone but I could tell he was watching me as he ate.

“What?” I asked finally, when he didn’t stop looking at me.

“You’re very interesting.” He said.

“How?” I scoffed.

“Well for starters you’re drop dead gorgeous but you don’t like being the center of attention. Am I right?”

“I wouldn’t go with drop dead gorgeous, maybe conventionally attractive. There’s not really anything wrong with me, but there’s nothing to write home to your mother about either.”

He chuckled. “See? There you go again. You’re humble and funny too.”

I could feel my face burning so I excused myself to go use the restroom, but Bill said he’d show me where it was since he needed to smoke and make some calls.

I was fully aware where it was, but agreed and figured I’d let him show me. He turned before we reached the bathroom and he opened a door that appeared to almost blend in to the wall, revealing a very plush, luxurious bathroom with a large vanity.

“Oh my gosh is this like the Secret VIP potty?” I asked. I had always heard about secret lounges and VIP cool stuff so I was ecstatic to actually see one. I probably seemed like such a dork but I didn’t care.

“Something like that.” He said following me inside and locking the door behind him. I turned around to tell him there only appeared to be one toilet, when he took a couple steps and closed the distance between us and kissed me, pinning me against the wall.

He pulled back and looked down into my eyes, “I’ve wanted to do this since I saw you.” He said deepening the kiss again.

I stepped aside to move out from under him and caught my breath. “Your girlfriend though!”

“It’s over with her. It’s been stale a long time” He said as he wrapped his arm around my waist. “Don’t worry, I'm sick of her. I much rather have you. Do you have a boyfriend?” He pulled me against him again and my God the man was so good looking.

“Nope. I’d have kicked you if I did, I’m not a cheater.” I couldn’t believe his lips were on me. I tried to think and get ahold of myself and be rational, but as he kissed down my neck and groped my breasts, it was getting hard to remember why this wasn’t the best idea ever.

“. Listen, you’re very attractive Bill. Like best looking guy I’ve ever seen attractive, and I’m flattered, but we should get back. They’re gonna wonder.”

“This dress is killing me though, and youre so so beautiful.” He groaned lustilly, as he slowly slid my dress’ strap down, continuing his way down, kissing down my throat to my chest. He exposes my breast and looks up to make sure I wasn’t going to object, but when I just bit my lip, he placed his mouth on my nipple, suckling at my breast. He releases it with a popping sound, and slips a hand under my skirt, rubbing me through my panties, as he sucksin a breath through his teeth, before going for my other breast. This motherfucker is gonna kill me. How can one man be so hot and what did I do in a past life to deserve this shit? Seriously universe? How do I carry on knowing his tongue was on my nipple?

He hiked my skirt up to brush his fingertips across my folds. He bit my bottom lip and then pulled his hand out from under my skirt, and sensually tasted his fingers before leading me to the large round cushioned ottoman at the vanity, trying to get me to sit.

“What are you up to? You’re - this is so bad.” I tell him as he pushes me down lightly as he kisses me passionatly.

He looked deep in my eyes. “Please let me taste you and make you feel good. I don’t expect anything from you and I don’t do this type of thing ever, but I’ve honestly never wanted to see what someone tastes like more in my life.”

FUCK. Who in the hell could say no to that?

All I could do is nod, too shocked to fully comprehend that this was really happening.

He got on his knees in front of me and I couldn’t help but admire his gorgeous features. As crazy as it sounds, he had the most beautiful bone structure; severe and angular, yet it was offset by his big green eyes with their long sweeping lashes, luscious plump full lips, and adorable perfect little child-like nose. His hair was silky and thick and he smelled like mint and soap.

I watched as he pulled my underwear off and placed them in his pocket, before leaning me back with one hand, as the other lifted my dress. He bit my inner thigh gently, but still sent a thrill up my spine causing me to visibly shudder.

“I haven’t even started yet,” he smirked up at me cockily, before pressing his mouth to my sex before I had time to reply. I’d had my pussy eaten before, but nothing like this. There was no sign of nervousness or insecurity that some men display when they go down there. Like you can tell they’re not sure what the fuck to do, but Bill was sure of himself and seemed to genuinely love doing it. He was so enthusiastic and it felt so amazing. I never had done something like this in my life, and wouldn’t even kiss on a first date, yet here I am. I was scandalized and aroused, and so close to an orgasm it was shocking.

“You gonna cum for me baby?. I love how you look right now.... Cum on my face.... please?” He pleaded and pushed another finger inside of me. I couldn’t look at him. It was all too much.

I let out a moan as he moved his fingers and tongue in such a combined effort, that I reached out and gripped his hair, pressing his face against me as my release crashed down on me, violently shaking me, and making everything go white, as it wound down. It was seriously one of the most intense orgasms I’ve ever had, and it took me longer than a polite amount of time to realize I was still holding his face, and immediately released him”I’m so sorry, I didn't realize I- .”

“Sshhh.” He said chuckling and came up and kissed me deeply. “Can you taste yourself on me?”

I nodded shyly, looking away to break eye contact. He was so intense and I wasn’t sure what he would want me to do to return the favor.

He put his finger under my chin and pulled my face back over to look in his eyes. “You’re beautiful.”

I looked back at him, waiting to see what he did next. I was surprised he wasn't taking his pants off, but was too shy to try and take them off myself. I really wanted to though, and that surprised me. I wanted him to fuck me and wasn’t going to think about it, just do it. Like Nike.

He stood up and helped me to my feet, and helped smooth my dress out. He pulled me into another kiss and I could feel how excited he was.

“Let me make you feel nice now.” I mentally scolded myself for saying something so not sexy but just looked up at him with my best doe eyed look.

“You’re so cute. Don’t worry about me, just yet. I don’t want a quickie in a bathroom with you, I want like a bed and many. many. hours. I want to impress you.”

“I’m fucking impressed Bill.”

He chuckled and bit his lip, and you could see the wheels turning. “I really want to fuck you but I also don’t wanna be too long and full disclosure, Andy threatened serious bodily harm not to touch you. Said you’re a heartbreaking man eater.”

“Randi advised me to avoid you because you’re a foreign actor that’s too good looking for his own good. You’re obviously a monster.”

We both got a good laugh out of that.

“What’s your phone number?” He asked taking out his phone.

“I don’t currently have one. I need to get one. I lost mine yesterday.”

He looked at me incredulously. “If you don’t want to give me your number it’s ok.”

“No. Take Randi’s number, that’s the phone I was using earlier anyways, that way you can call, cuz I don’t have a pen or anything.”

“How about your email, and then you can send me your number when you get it. Randi might catch on if I call her phone.”

“You’re so smart! You’ll see me in a week on your new movie too.”

“Really? That’s the best news I got all day but if you think I’m waiting a week to be inside you, you’re insane. Now go, just say I went to smoke and make calls if they ask where I am. I’ll give it a couple minutes.”

I gave him my email and walked out the door to go try and act like the hottest fucking thing to ever happen in my life, didn’t just go down. When I turned the corner, I nearly threw up and cane to a screeching halt. I met eyes with the estranged exgirlfriend. I didn’t wanna seem weird so I smiled and sat down to finish my meal, since turning around and running the other direction might bad. I mean as far as I was concerned he was single, so I had no reason to feel guilty of anything. And I didn’t plan on admitting that happened to anyone, so not telling her was totally fine. She tapped on my arm and I cautiously turned to her.

“Did you see Bill by chance?” She asked politely.

“He said he was smoking and making some important calls when he left the table earlier.”

She laughed a little and rolled her eyes, “that man and his cigarettes! I blame Hemlock Grove for turning him into a chainsmoker. He’s probably smoked two or three in a row.”

“All this talk about smoking makes me want one, I’ll go find him. Excuse me ladies.” Andy said, as he quickly walked towards the exit to find Bill.

“He’s probably going to warn Bill that I’m here. We got in a fight earlier and he can be such a brat. Watch when he comes back, he’ll pretend like nothing happened.”

Maybe she didn’t realize he really was done with her. She had a funny accent so I assumed she’s Swedish too. He was probably her only friend out here so I couldn’t help but pity her.

“Between silent treatments and smoking, Bill would be dead by morning.” Randi said with a mischievous wink.

“Oh if you could see his hissy fits, they’re the worst!” She enthused. “Anything in his hands he’ll throw and if it’s something like a sandwich or drinks and won’t hurt you, he’ll throw it on you. But then if I try and ignore him, he’ll lay on me like a big dead weight until I speak.” His girlfriend said, laughing hysterically. Everyone joined in telling stories of past boyfriends that were grown men, having varying degrees of tantrums, but I just sat silently. My ex story wasn’t funny.

Andy and Bill came back and I could feel an anxiety attack creeping up on me.

I looked up and Bill was staring at me and I looked to Randi and she had a puzzled look on her face. In an effort to not give anything away to her, my eyes shot back up to Bill.

Bill looked furious. He seethed animosity and I just looked down at my plate to avoid that glare. I wasn't sure if I was the cause or she was, but I desperately wanted to run out of the place screaming and looked at Randi again pleading with my eyes to go. She seemed to catch on and I tried to keep it together.

His ex got up and rushed over to him. Just as I looked up, she planted a soft kiss on his cheek. My eyes narrowed involuntarily as he glanced over at me, but I couldn't tear my eyes away from him. His girlfriend grabbed his face and kissed him right on the lips.

I felt like I was going to throw up. Tears threatened to spill but I held them back as I stared at my lap. I kept seeing Bill’s eyes as he looked up at me from between my legs. Flashes of him pinning me to the wall, or oh my fucking god! My underwear are in his pocket!

My pussy is on his face too and he just kissed her.

He seemed so genuine, but he was an actor, what did I expect. Faking Feelings and emotions was how he paid the bills. I couldn’t believe how stupid and guillable I was! He probably got off on this shit. Poor woman. I was exaggerating when I’d said he was a monster but goddammit I was right!!!

”Ok thank you for inviting us and I can't wait to see whoever is going to join us in Toronto, but Liv and I must be off for an important appointment and then packing.” Randi said her goodbyes as I walked around the table and stood beside her, keeping my back to Bill.

”Bye everybody. I had fun” I said Sweetly and then I turned on my heel and walked past Bill without a glance.

”See you two in Toronto.” Bill called after us, and even though I refused to look at him, I could feel his eyes burning into my back as we walked away.

#bill skarsgard #bill skarsgård #bill skarsgard au #bill skarsgard asks #my writing

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teekl-darling · 5 years ago

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My Grey-Romantic Experience

EDIT 09/19/2023 - HEY GUYS I haven’t really been on this blog in years but I’m thinking of using it again, so I just wanted to put an update here for clarity’s sake, in case anyone ever comes back to it: I now identify as fully aroace + lesbian. I’m 24 now, still have not experienced romantic/sexual attraction, and the little crushes that I mention in this post are basically nothing-blips on that timeline that I just don’t even count anymore. But I am in a QPR with a woman whom I love very much (hence the lesbian bit). We’re very happy together.

I was just gonna delete this post because of how outdated it is, but I’ll leave it up in case what I wrote here is helpful to anyone. And it’s kinda like a time capsule for myself. Okay gay update over. Here’s the actual post:

Disclaimer #1: My personal favorite aro spec flags are the ones that include the yellow stripe for friendship, yet I’ve heard this color is hard for some people to view so I’ve excluded it.

What with it being Pride Month and all, I thought I might take the time to explore some of my recent feelings about where I stand on the aromantic spectrum, and share my story. Maybe people will have some feedback that can help me to make sense of this as well. Or conversely, maybe some people will see this and find it helpful and relateable! Whether I’m helping others or being helped, I’d love to put this out there for others to see.

Disclaimer #2: This post is purely about grey-romantic experiences, as opposed to grey-sexual. I’m not anywhere on the ace spectrum.

Disclaimer #3: Clearly, I like to spell it “grey” not “gray,” don’t hate me “gray”-lovers.

Grey-romantic is something that I feel is often misunderstood, because the definitions at first glance don’t truly convey what it means. I myself didn’t think much of it until I realized how applicable it was to me. That I didn’t fully identify as aromantic, but alloromantic didn’t seem to fit either, and I had to deal with very palpable issues because of it.

I’m almost 20 years old now. I’ve never been in a relationship, fallen in love or had strong romantic feelings towards anyone. I’ve had two crushes in my entire life, both on boys, which makes me certain that regardless of where I am on the aro spec, I’m definitely straight. (I am female).

For a while in high school, and even in middle school, I would feel isolated or different seeing everyone around me develop crushes and romantic relationships. I myself was in love with the idea of romance, but never experienced what I would expect true romantic feelings to feel like. All I really have as a frame of reference is the two crushes I had, but I don’t know what it feels like to be in love. In all honesty, I just assume it’s a stronger and more potent version of a crush. I had my last crush when I was in my tweens or early teens, probably around 12 or 14 years of age. After a while I forgot what it felt like to experience those warm fuzzies.

This experience I had matched up with pretty much every description I found of grey-romantic, including other people’s accounts and experiences. But there was more to it than just a lack of romantic attraction.

I also found myself frequently developing “squishes” or “platonic crushes” on several different girls throughout middle, high school, and even college. It’s a bit hard to explain unless you’ve experienced it for yourself, but I’ll do my best to explain through my own experiences:

My stomach or my heart would flutter whenever she sent me messages, whenever I got to talk to her, whenever she said she loved me. I would feel all warm and fuzzy holding hands with her, I would fantasize about cuddling with her, I would talk with her at all hours if I had the chance. What she thought of me meant everything to me. I would get jealous if she had a close friendship with another girl, even if I knew that friendship was not as close as ours was. In a nutshell, I was infatuated with her in all the ways that you might consider romantic. But sexual stuff, and kissing? I’d never think of doing that with her. I also generally only had one squish at a time.

This infatuation was so strong that I would often confuse myself, wonder to myself whether I was romantically in love with this girl even though deep down I knew it was something else. With one girl, I did consider asking her to date me, to satisfy this infatuation, but the thought of being with her romantically didn’t sit right with me and I never did.

For a period, I identified as bi-curious and thought I might be bisexual, or biromantic. I now know that this is not the case and never has been. I had mistaken these “queerplatonic” relationships for romantic ones, because I had no frame of reference and no idea what romantic attraction actually felt like. Furthermore, even though I didn’t have a squish on her, I strongly admired a girl in one of my senior classes, and similar to my squishes, I mistook this admiration for romantic attraction.

So being grey-romantic can be more than just a lack of romantic attraction, it can also mean dealing with the aftermath of that lack. In my case, (and in many other cases I’ve read), it meant I could not properly distinguish between strong platonic love, and romantic love. I feel platonic love very intensely. I know from talking to others, that not all girls experience friendship the way I do. On the other hand, I have yet to find a romantic soulmate, and currently, I have no interest in doing so. The thought of romance does not necessarily repulse me, but right now I’m content to give all my love to my dearest friends.

My point is if you’ve experienced anything similar, there’s nothing wrong with you. You just experience romantic and platonic love a bit differently from the way it’s portrayed in media, etc. It doesn’t necessarily mean that you’ll never find love, if you want to. I like the way I am, and you should like the way you are.

I will also be making a post dissecting the subcategories of grey-romantic so be on the lookout for that if you’re interested. And feel free to ask me anything about these experiences in my ask box! I don’t mind and it’s never a bother.

Have a lovely day, lovelies. <3

#pride month #greyromantic #aro spec #aromantic #grey aro #lgbtq #grayromantic #grey-aro #aromantic spectrum #queerplatonic #platonic #squishes #platonic crush

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izzy-b-hands · 5 years ago

Note

20-30!

Thank you so much for asking!!!!

20. Favorite character to write?

Already answered, but I don’t mind re-answering cuz I thought maybe I’d narrow my three way tie, but alas, no lol. Still a tie between Ahkmenrah, Snafu, and Skwisgaar.

21. Least favorite character to write?

Ooh-tbh, Larry from NATM just because I feel like I always make him an asshole? Like, I haven’t published all my fic ideas for NATM because I keep making him really mean? And in some it works but in others I’m like ‘jesus chill Lee he’s just a Dude trying his best’ but also at the same time I feel the way Stiller played him and his character arc means he’s got some major ego to him as the films go on? Idk that isn’t a hot take or anything just me being frustrated with Ben Stiller lol

22. Favorite story you’ve ever written?

Hard choice, because I love all my kids, but I cried after writing this one lol: https://aboutthatmelancholystorm.tumblr.com/post/186781309036/you-know-that-i-love-you

It hit some personal stuff for me, so to be able to have it work organically in a fic so I could also like, mini therapy session myself? Cool af. Also, ppl seemed to like this a lot too, and while that validation isn’t the only reason I write, it’s always cool when my writing makes ppl happy.

23. Least favorite story you’ve ever written?

I don’t really have a least favorite, but I do have some I’m more frustrated with, due to how long they took me to write, etc. Currently? The answer to this is my Mark the Date series because A. it is taking me a day and an age to finish it and B. I feel like it kinda flopped, so it’s hard to pull up any energy to finish it, but like...I may as well now lol. I’ll get it done eventually.

24. Favorite scene you’ve written?

Oh god tbh I have too many I love just cuz like

I can go back to how I felt writing them and yeah

But as of most recent fics, I really this bit:

-Snafu patted the blanket near his head, and waited for Eugene to put out his pipe and lay back beside him before snuggling close to him. “You could be right. Could be God. Could just be love.” “How’s that?” “I think love has its own way. Even before you meet someone, even before you know you’re fallin’ for ‘em. Love’s just…out there, like the air or somethin’. Finds you when the time is right, and finds who you click with. You gotta do the rest, the stayin’ in love part, but that bringing together, that first spark…that’s love just existing, and doin’ what it needs to so the world keeps spinnin’, so people make it through tough shit,” Snafu replied. “I like that,” Eugene said. “Think love did a good job with us. Makin’ sure we found each other.” Snafu pressed a kiss softly to the corner of Eugene’s mouth. “Sure did. Wouldn’t ever want to be with anyone else. I don’t even know what that looks like, and I don’t want to.” “Same here,” Eugene’s mouth was warm as he kissed him back. “Here’s to love for making sure you found me.” -

from this fic: https://aboutthatmelancholystorm.tumblr.com/post/186926226531/absolution-is-the-taste-of-your-lips

Because I’m sappy af more than I let on, and also this was a chance to like, write out my own feelings via Snafu. And that was a pretty cool and fulfilling thing for me, ya know?

25. Favorite line you’ve ever written?

oh god this is another hard one to narrow down but

I always come back to this line and go ‘oh shit did I really write that. Nah, someone better than me at this had to have. They briefly possessed me or something”:

-Music and talking and shouting and footsteps collide kaleidoscopic in his ears, but none bearing the one sound that he’d run to if he heard it.-

from this fic, mentioned twice now in this post lol: https://aboutthatmelancholystorm.tumblr.com/post/186781309036/you-know-that-i-love-you

I really love alliteration, and for me this line just sums up how it feels to walk thru a city when you aren’t just wandering really, but are looking or waiting for someone, and have that awful yet sometimes good feeling of expecting to hear or see them but it feels like you’re waiting or searching forever and in the meantime the city just lives on around you, a stopped platelet stuck in a vein full of vitality. Like, idk if it hit any of my readers that way, but that’s what I was trying to get across lol, so the line always hits me hard in a good way when I scroll thru my writing tag and see it.

26. Story you’re most proud of?

Gosh

I gotta choose just one kid for this aldsfkja I’m bad at choosing I love my gaggle of ragtag goofballs. I have an original piece I’d choose for this, but I’ve never posted it on here, so I’m gonna choose out of my fanfic on here instead.

One I am really proud of is this one: https://aboutthatmelancholystorm.tumblr.com/post/186781309036/you-know-that-i-love-you

and I know it’s the third time it’s been part of an answer on here but

I really love this one idk. Thinking back to how I felt while writing it, how it all flowed in a certain way. The whole experience was just something else, and I’m proud of this one in a certain way I find myself, funnily enough, unable to describe.

27. Best review you ever got?

Okay this sounds cheesy but like

I really do love and appreciate every review or review-like thing I’ve ever gotten so I can’t choose just one for this

Like, y’all gotta understand, I’ve deleted some of it and erased traces of it from my blog, but I’ve written for years on here, I have some stuff on my ao3, and for the longest time I got nothing back, or very nearly nothing. Maybe a few likes, but no comments and not much else. I always just rolled with it and assumed I just wasn’t writing anything good enough to inspire reviews. Idk if that’s true or not, but in any case it means I cherish every comment, like, reblog, and anything review-like in nature because I’m so grateful to have it now, and I know it could well be pure luck that I stumbled up on a really supportive bunch of fandoms with great readers.

In other words, thank y’all for every kind word and like and reblog and also I may be an immortal feeding off of validation of my art, but we’ll see on that last bit, because I haven’t tested it.

28. Worst review you ever got?

One from middle school. I’d just finished my very first novel, gave it to a friend to read, and he said it ‘smacked of being too fanciful and childish, something only kids and women would read’ (it was a YA fantasy novel so I mean... what exactly he expected, idk cuz he knew what it was before I gave it to him, like it’s supposed to have those elements as a lot of these sorts of novels/stories do, and that isn’t a bad thing about them at all, so like...what his damage was idek.)

Also this is the same dude who texts me randomly and is really weird abt his friendship with me and happens to be an English teacher now (RIP to his students.)

Anyway, after he said that I tossed a review right back, because well, middle school and also I was very upset with him because I’d not asked for anything other than a general ‘if you picked this up randomly and started it, would it suck you in enough to keep reading or would you put it down’ like that was literally all I needed him to answer for me. So I told him his latest novel (his second at that point) was essentially just him masturbating to his own opinions (because he’s an arguer, who loves to tell ppl they’re always wrong, and that’s by his own admission) for one hundred pages, and not in a way that anyone else would care to read. He was pissed, but so was I. We didn’t talk for a good week, and we had almost all our classes together lol.

Like, getting nothing back in review sucks too, but this one has stuck with me forever. Best part? I mentioned it to him a few years back, and he only vaguely remembered it, and followed it with “but I’ve said a lot of rough stuff about your work. I mean, it deserved it at the time, but you might be good at this someday!”

I didn’t smack him, but I really, really wanted to.

29. Favorite story/poem of another author

This doesn’t specify on Tumblr or not, so I’ve got two: one from outside tumblr, and one from on here.

A. When I have Fears That I May Cease to Be by John Keats

When I have fears that I may cease to be Before my pen has gleaned my teeming brain,Before high-pilèd books, in charactery, Hold like rich garners the full ripened grain;When I behold, upon the night’s starred face, Huge cloudy symbols of a high romance,And think that I may never live to trace Their shadows with the magic hand of chance;And when I feel, fair creature of an hour, That I shall never look upon thee more,Never have relish in the faery power Of unreflecting love—then on the shoreOf the wide world I stand alone, and thinkTill love and fame to nothingness do sink.

B. Again, this Tumblr one could be a huge ass list because y’all on here are amazing, but one I’ve been rereading over and over again recently is @xmxisxforxmaybe ‘s Remnants series, which can be found here: https://xmxisxforxmaybe.tumblr.com/post/186702235396/remnants-complete-work

Like, Ahk as a character is captured so well, and I love the way the plot twines and also when the smut comes up? Very good A+ smut, something I value pretty highly on and off Tumblr because man, sometimes smut is just work to write, so I appreciate it when it’s really good. All around, this series has captured my heart and I legit have a link to it saved on multiple devices so if I need something to read, I can just pull it up right away.

30. Hardest part of writing?

Self-doubt. It’s the biggest hurdle for any artist, regardless of the art in question I think, but with writing it seems to double down a lot. Like, you have to really get out of your own head, even as you spend all your time there with your writing ideas. Shit gets weird and twisted, man.

For the longest time, I really let self-doubt defeat me too, and I regret the time I lost to that. I still get hit with it randomly, cause I don’t think it every really goes away for any writer, not even the big names like Stephen King or Neil Gaiman (who I’m half tempted to @ on here purely because I wanna know his feelings on this stuff because I respect and admire him as an artist and his thoughts very much, but also he’s a very busy man so I’m not gonna bug him by doing that lol.)

All there is to do is to work with it, push past it, and most importantly keep writing. I have days where that feels like the hardest thing, but each day I manage to get past it and get the words down? I let myself feel proud of that, and mark it as an achievement in my Big Book of Stuff I’ve Done in This Life.

#text post #ask box things #these answers got long and wordy but I doubt that surprises anyone lol #this helped to answer a bunch of these too #finally got me to a point where I feel ready to try and sleep even if I'm not tired #so thank you to everyone who asked me stuff!!!!#apineappleheart

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lady-olive-oil · 6 years ago

Text

Brown Sugah Baby: Chapter 6

Here we go with another installment of Brown Sugah Baby! I only own the OCs in this story and the events. There is a hint of abuse mentioned in here, I was once a victim of mental abuse and I’ve gotten better. If you need someone to talk to, my box is always open. Without further ado, here we go! Let me know if you wanna be in the tag squad! Feedback is always appreciated!

Word Count: 3,434

Warnings: mentions of physical abuse and language

Tag Squad: @maddiestundentwritergaines || @destinio1 || @designerwriterchic || @terrablaze514 || @themyscxiras || @sirenmouths || @chaneajoyyy

In the midst of everything going on, winter break finally made its way to Southern University. This game of ‘not talking’ between M’Baku and Nefe, went on longer than anticipated. But for the holidays, Nefe to Miami for Christmas and Nattie went to Wakanda with T’Challa. At this point in time, he told her his true identity and what he was doing at an HBCU for.

Nattie didn’t know how to take it at all. She did however pass out in the middle of the throne room and hadn’t woken up for a good few hours or so.

“So you mean to tell me that, you’re about to become king of Wakanda. The most technologically advanced country in the world?”

She asked with a questionable expression on her face, sitting next to T’Challa as he held an ice pack on her head, on his bed. His room had overlooked the city below that was breathtaking.

“Yes I am. Nakia is a war dog, she presented the idea to go to school in America. I hope this doesn’t change anything about how yuh feel about me.”

Placing a hand on her cheek to ease her pain, Nattie placed hers on top and smiled sweetly. Breathing evenly before responding.

“It’ll take me some getting used to, but I also know that I have to tell Nefe. We promised no more secrets after the whole Sean and Melanie thing. She chewed my ass out over that and I hate myself for it.”

“You did what you had to do. She is your best friend, and sometimes you have to make sacrifices for the greater good.” Holding her close to him, a gentle kiss was laid.

“Oh and about telling Nefe, you can't tell her anything. At least not yet.”

“Ok pause. What do you mean I can’t? You know how she gets T’Challa, I can’t hide shit from her anymore.”

Feeling her head throb in pain, she laid back down to close her eyes and center her breathing more.

“You can’t say anything because,” T’Challa sighed heavily and closed his eyes before continuing on.

“Because what-”

“Because M’Baku has to tell her. That’s why.”

What was he talking about now? None of this made sense at all and she needed to to know more.

“What does that have to do with M’Baku? It’s not like he’s detained to be king too.”

There was a poignant silence in the air, as her eyes got wide in astonishment.

“No way. You mean to tell me that M’Baku is going to become-”

“King of the mountains. Jabari Land to be more accurate.”

All of this didn’t make sense to Nattie at all, but then a thought came to mind. She remembered the metal looking bracelets she saw on Nakia and Okoye’s wrists at a party one time, but never questioned them.

“You guys have these thick metal bracelets right? Y’all never leave the house without it.”

“These are kimoyo beads. Made out of vibranium and somewhat holographic.” T’Challa explains as he tapped on the bracelet and a hologram of his sister popped up.

“Brother, is everything ok- oh my. You told her!” Shuri shrieked through the projection, causing Nattie to chuckle a bit.

“Yeah he uh- finally told me. I now have to keep it a secret from Nefe. Which will be hard to do, seeing as though she scares the hell outta me and we promised to not keep secrets anymore.” She directed her attention towards T’Challa who looked apologetic for all of it.

“If I know my brother well, he’ll let you know when to tell her. Or have M’Baku do it. Has he told her yet, after finding out they’ve known each other since they were kids?”

Nattie rolled her eyes at T’Challa, knowing he told his sister.

“You really can’t hold water can you?”

“You told me, so I told my sister. Who I’m sure told all of Wakanda.”

Shuri shrugged, waving goodbye to them both before disappearing.

“We have to get back to school tomorrow, and I want a bracelet.” Nattie looked at T’Challa with a sweet expression, causing him to smile and chuckle.

“Are you indicating, that you see a future with me already?” The soft caress on her cheek made her look into his eyes lovingly.

“Maybe. Only time will tell, my Prince.” She kisses him sweetly, holding his face in her hands before breaking it.

“Time to pack?”

“Time to pack.”

-24 Hours Later-

Nefe made it back to Shreveport safe and sound, with focus on finishing junior year strong. Only one more yet left and she couldn’t handle all the pressure of drama; boys and possibly failing classes. She needed this degree in science of music. At least she’d have something to fall back on.

Before everyone left for Christmas break, Nefe made sure to talk to Nattie about not keeping secrets from each, other or the crew ever again. To be completely honest, Nefe was already breaking it by not telling anyone that Sean had hit her a few times. The only person who probably noticed the marks under the makeup, which was hidden very well with an untrained eye, was M’Baku.

He knew but didn’t say anything because he knew how much she loved Sean, yet saw his true colors a few months ago. All that is behind everyone now, and everything should go back on track. The weather is nice out, the crew is back to normal or so they thought.

“You’ve got to be kidding me.” Nefe mumbles to herself as she unravels a scene before her very eyes.

Melanie all over M’Baku again, in the courtyard, even after the whole fight that broke out. She wanted to scream; she wanted to cry, but she knew she couldn’t do any of that because it would be held over her head. She had feelings for M’Baku and didn’t know how to tell him at all. It broke her down so much.

Shooting a quick text to Nattie to meet her in the yard, she could’ve sworn Melanie looked at her. For a split second she sent a menacing smile and wink, towards Nefe, and kissed M’Baku. She couldn’t look or think straight, the rage boiled up in her with rage and fury as she stormed off.

Nattie came once she saw her best friend walk off in tears. Curiously over the scene 20 feet away, she saw the beginning of the fight between the two. She couldn’t tell her best friend yet till she was calm and ready. So she comforted her with buying her lunch and decided to have a sleepover with the Deltas.

“Melanie! What the fuck was that?!” M’Baku growled in rage as he pushed her off him, wiping his mouth off in disgust.

“Giving you what you missed all winter break, baby.” She placed her arms around his neck, and was pushed off once more.

“I told you once, and imma tell you again: I don’t want you anymore. We are done. Why can’t you get that through your thick skull?” M’Baku was beyond pissed off at this point.

“Why do you like her?! I don’t fucking get it! What does she have that I don’t?!”

Giving Melanie a once over, he scoffed while rubbing his chin. Shaking his head before responding, he arched a brow at her.

“Self respect and integrity for one. You just get on my nerves. I put up with your shit for too long, just go to Sean. He knows how to deal with you better than I can.”

He stormed off leaving Melanie in shock and embarrassment, causing her to storm off as well in anger.

Meanwhile, M’Baku took his anger out at the gym like always. He couldn’t stand the fact that Melanie didn’t understand that he wasn’t into her like that anymore.

“Girl troubles I see?” T’Challa asked as he leaned on the weight bar, occasionally spotting M’Baku to help out.

“You have no idea. She won’t leave me alone at all.” M’Baku didn’t know what to do anymore about Melanie, and it put a strain on his friendship with Nefe. Which frightened him.

“Forget about her. You need to focus on Nefertiti, mainly because she saw you earlier.” Erik chimed in, taking his Beats out of his ears.

“Damn it. I’m gonna have to talk to her.”

“I’d rather you let her cool off. She looked pretty peeved about it. It might’ve been karma? Which is a bad example and imma shut up now.”

“At least you tried T’Challa.” Erik snickered a bit, causing M’Baku to join in. He sighed gently and rubbed his face with a tired expression.

“Are the girls busy tonight?” He asked with caution.

“Yeah they’re having a pj party, tonight. The welcome back bash.” T’Challa responded while getting his stuff to head to his Greek house.

“I’ll probably talk to her tomorrow then. Cause I saw Sean with her earlier too. This can’t go on forever.”

M’Baku left the gym with god boys with determination on his mind to talk to his best friend.

-PJ Bash-

“Nefe! Can you grab the China Glaze polish case please?” It was the annual DST pj bash, as an event to say welcome back to school. Knowing that Nefe wasn’t in any mood to talk about what had transpired over the last few hours or so, she faced the music anyway.

“Yeah I got it.” Getting up from her spot on the couch, after deleting all her pictures of her and Sean from her phone, she grabbed the polish bucket from the cabinet.

The bash was going outside in the grand hall building, where every party was held and was occupied by many students for the bash. Not just the divine nine. Heading down to the bash with the girls, with the supplies, she felt comfy yet sexy in her pajamas. The were a simple silk tank top and shorts set with a matching robe, that floated behind her every time she walked. Her hair was in a high puff ball, in all its wash day glory. She saw M’Baku walk in with his friends and immediately felt her heart beat out of her chest.

She wanted to talk to him. No she needed to and now was a good time as any. ‘Man he looks good’ she thought to herself. She watched as his dri fit white shirt cling to his muscles, as his grey sweatpants accentuated his ass like a god that he is.

“Damn..” she mumbled to herself eyeing him over and over again. Thinking about the possible things she wouldn’t mind doing to him.

“Hey sis. I gotta talk to you about something.” Nattie grabbed the polish box, breaking her friend’s concentration, and guided Nefe towards the balcony.

“Uh sure. What’s up?”

“Well you know how over winter break I went to Wakanda with T’Challa? And before when we promised we wouldn’t hide anything from each other?” Nattie started off shakily and fiddled with her red robe string.

“Yeah. What about it? Need to tell me something don’t you?” With an arched brow, Nefe leaned against the railing, crossing her arms over her chest.

“Yes yes I do.” Nattie sighs gently and braces herself. “Over winter break I was Wakanda, obviously, and T’Challa had mentioned something to me. Something important.”

Nefe furrowed her brows and was waiting for her friend to finish.

“Go on.” She urged her.

“He told me he’s next in line for the Wakanda throne, Nefe. He and Shuri are royals; Nakia and Erik are war dogs, Okoye is his badass general and M’Baku is a royal too. But he’s next in line for the Jabari Land throne.”

Once she got it all out in one breath, the space between then two was silent. Nothing but silence and it was broken by Nefe laughing. She held her sides as she continued on.

“Oh that’s a good one. An African prince coming to America for school, that’s rich. On top of that, his friends coming along as well.” Nefe couldn’t believe her friend at all. What would a prince come to America for school?

“You think- you think I’m lying? You’ve really gone down to that point in our friendship. Wow, can not believe that my best friend is calling me a liar.” Nattie shook her head in disbelief at her friends accusation.

“I’m not calling you a liar. I would never do that to you. We’ve been through too much growing up and I would never, I swear on my Nikes.” If she swore in her Nike’s, she meant business.

“Why would royalty come to America for school? They’re from one of the most technologically advanced countries in the world, and they came here. That doesn’t make sense to me.” Nefe felt out of place and not in the right space.

“Listen, I accept your apology if we go get gelato tomorrow. Who you need to talk to is him.” Nattie moved her head in M’Baku’s general direction, to where he was at the party.

“Deal on the gelato. I’m so very sorry for accusing you and I appreciate you for telling me the truth. I’ll talk to him about it soon, along with something important.” Nefe hugged her best friend tightly before heading downstairs.

Making her way towards the dance floor, in a busy sea of college kids it their pajamas, Melanie and Nefertiti glanced at each other for a split second before minding their own business. Feeling her nerves rush towards her again, as she journeyed closer to him.

“H-hey, ahem. Can we go somewhere and talk?” Tapping his shoulder gently, Nefe saw his smiling face for the first time in a month since they last talked. Receiving a gentle nod from him, she took his hand and headed towards the door to head her sorority house. Which was literally next door.

“Uh where you think you’re going?” Melanie stood in front of them, blocking their way.

Nefe didn’t have time for this again. She got in her face and was real personal about it.

“Move, or be moved.” She gritted her teeth and flared her nostrils. Making her fear her. Melanie gulped and moved out the way.

With a roll of her eyes Nefe continued her path with M’Baku in tow. Heading upstairs to her room, and locking the door just in case.

“What do you see in her? Honestly that’s got to be one of the dumbest choices you’ve made.” Nefe scoffed and walked around the room with her hands on her hips.

“Oh my dumbest choice? That’s funny coming from someone who dated the score keeper.” This was the chance M’Baku has waited for. He wanted to tell her off but also express his feelings.

“Score keeper? What are you talking about? You went out with Melanie and watched her make my life hell cause I’m friends with you!”

“Nefertiti you went out with Sean, that was the stupidest shit you’ve ever done. We’ve tried to tell you over and over again, he was using you!” He never called her by her full first name and it scared her. Yet she was never one to back down.

“I know how to handle my goddamn battles M’Baku. You know me, damn it! Melanie thrives on making my life hell-”

“Sean tried to make mine hell but I beat him to it every time.”

The tension could be cut with a knife between theses two and their bickering. Nattie and the gang had followed them of course to be nosy, trying to listen against the door and the walls.

“You need to make a god damn choice, M’Baku! I’m not gonna be waiting forever.” Nefe was fuming mad over all of this and needed to get it through his head that he needed to make an choice.

“I have to make a choice now? What about you? This isn’t just on me Nefertiti! Me or Sean?” Once he got in her face, his voice dropped a few octaves, making it extremely hard for her to focus.

It took her a minute to collect her bearings; felt her rage build up all at once, and had the courage to talk back to him.

”Me or Melanie? Take your pick, because at this rate I’m done playing charades with you. Your highness.” The grit in teeth and the emphasis on highness, made it worse.

The color seemed to drain from his face as he looked into her eyes, when the moon reflected upon them. His breathing was heavy and caught in his throat. Who told her?

“How do you know about that? How told you?” He was more worried than he should be.

“Nattie did. Told me all about her winter vacation to Wakanda, to meet his mother. I’m surprised Melanie doesn’t know. Ha, she’d go through hell or high water just to keep your demanding ass.” The snarl didn’t help her case anyhow.

“My demanding ass? Wow ok. You’re the one whose demanding, you’re the one who was stuck up so far Sean’s fake ass that you couldn’t see the truth. You couldn’t tell anyone, expect me, as to why he hit you!”

“He what?! Imma kill his ass.” Erik mumbled in a whisper on the other side of the door.

“Not until I get him first.” Nattie added with him. No one hurts her best friend and gets away with it.

This time Nefe’s face fell in embarrassment and regret.

“I-” her words were choked up.

“Nothing to say huh? It hurt me when you said it. My best friend, from childhood I might add, was being hit because she told him no. But when shit hit the fan, you finally left and let go.” His voice was softer and soothing. He lifted her chin to look into her eyes, to make sure she heard every word.

“I didn’t know what to do after the third time. It was all a shock that it happened to me. When I told him I needed a break he wasn’t happy and stormed out. He tried to get me back that day before our date, and I told him that we’re done. He gave me one last hug and I guess you saw that.” She explained and then remembered all of it, scene for scene.

“I did and that’s why I broke our date. I thought he got you back.” His thumb caressed her high cheekbone, as her eyes shifted.

“I was gonna talk to you too, but Melanie kissed you earlier and just infuriates me how much she craves-”

M’Baku couldn’t take it anymore with their constant bickering, so he took matters into his own hands, and just pinned her to the wall kissing her with everything in him.

The sudden gasp that left her lips, as they kissed, made her light headed. She didn’t know what to think or do, so she just went with her gut and returned the kiss in all its entirety.

“You...you just kissed me.” Her voice was hushed. Their breaths mingling in synchronization with their heavy breathing, as the kiss was broken. The shear moment alone took her breath away, freezing the muscles in her body as he kept her hands on his biceps. Having dreamt of this moment for years but never thought it would happen. Thankful to the gods that it is.

“And uh, I’m about to do it again.” He whispers against her full lips, pulling her curvy body closer to his rigid torso. Letting his rough hands take their perspective journey along her back, as if they were destined to be there. Her hands were locked around his neck, debating on what to do next. Throwing caution to the wind, going with what her heart wanted, she looked up into his soft loving brown eyes with her golden brown ones, and bit her lip.

“What’s stopping you?” She whispered back, kissing him harder than he did before. A pleased groan escaped from both of them, all the pent up frustration leaving their bodies into the atmosphere. Their lips fit together like a puzzle piece as the moves in sync, holding on to each other for dear life. Her nimble fingers moved under his shirt, tracing the hard working muscles. His hands traveled as well, from her hips to over her voluptuous ass and gave a hard squeeze. Earning a shaky moan from her, while she dragged her nails against the back of his neck. There was no turning back now, and neither of them cared.

#mbaku imagine #mbaku x oc #wives of mbaku #mbaku x nefertiti #mbaku x nefertiti adisa #winston duke #winston duke x amara la negra #Amara La Negra #brown sugah baby #M'Baku #mbaku fanfiction

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greencrusader13 · 5 years ago

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OC Interview - Terasas Feldspar

The rules are simple: pick an OC, and then answer these interview questions in-character for them. Then tag five more people to keep it going!

I got tagged again by @melissagt so I wanted to do two more: one for Terasas Feldspar, and one for Tyar Kiht. Since I don’t think people know a lot about Terasas other than what I’ve vaguely mentioned of him in previous posts, I thought I’d start with him.

Like with the Raz interview I picked a particular point in time in his life to answer these questions, which for the sake of clarity I’ll make it the same as when I answered Raz’s questions. Terasas would be 33 at this time.

Tagging: @the-sith-in-the-sky-with-diamond @athiefswarwriteblr @nusaran @kunoichi-ume @francestroublr

1. What is your name?

I’m Terasas Feldspar.

2. Do you know why are you named that?

It’s similar t’ my pa’s name, which was Tessir.

3. Are you single or taken?

I just got married t’ a wonderful gal named Mynai. I’ve been infatuated with her since I met her back when we was teenagers, but she was with my best friend back then. It’s really something else that not only is she back in my life, she’s now my wife.

4. Have any abilities or powers?

I’m a pretty decent swordsman, and good enough with a bow t’ go hunting on occasion. I don’t really fancy myself as being anything particularly special.

5. Stop being a Mary Sue.

I don’t know what that is.

6. What’s your eye color?

Green.

7. How about your hair color?

I in’t got any hair, but my fur is sorta this reddish-brown color.

8. Have any family members?

I’ve got my daughter Ariya, whom I had with my late wife Valika. My little girl is my world. I’d do anything for her and t’ protect her. She was a surprise definitely...Val and I weren’t married when she was conceived, but I can’t think of life without Ariya. The first time I held my daughter I... I can’t even describe the sort of love I felt.

My parents aren’t around any more. I wish Ariya could’ve met her grandparents. She looks so much like my ma, and I think the two really would’ve gotten along well.

Like I said before I just got married t’ Mynai, and I consider myself a really lucky man. I didn’t think I’d find love again after Val died, but here I am... here we are. I’m not sure if or when we’re gonna have kids of our own; it’s come up, and we’d both like t’, but right now Mynai wants t’ just adjust t’ being Ariya’s stepmother.

I’ve only got one sibling: my half-sister Dirna. She’s also Raz’s half-sister, so we’re kinda like brothers in that way too. My ma was her mother, and Raz’s pa was hers too.

Speaking of Raz, he’s like my brother. He hasn’t always been there when I needed him, but he’s getting better about it. He helped Ariya and I get t’ safety when true night returned t’ the world, and came back when there was a killer here in New Coalfell and helped put a stop t’ it. Even with small things he’s getting better, like he helped watch Ariya while Mynai and I were off on our honeymoon. My friend needs t’ stop being so hard on himself. He’s a better person than he thinks he is.

9. Oh? How about pets?

I in’t much of a pet person. Besides, until recently I was a single father, and I couldn’t’ve handled looking after my child and a pet.

10. That’s cool, I guess. Now, tell me something you don’t like?

I in’t a big fan of most alcohols. Wine just about does it for me.

11. Do you have any activities/hobbies that you like to do?

I like t’ go hunting and fishing when the stars align. My pa used t’ take me if he ever won a big hand at cards when I was little when he’d have enough coin t’ be gone for a day or two. Fishing is really calming. I like just sitting by the stream for hours without much care.

12. Have you ever hurt anyone in any way before?

I try not to, but everyone’s made mistakes. I’m no exception.

13. Ever… killed anyone before?

Yes. Before becoming guard captain I was a guardsman like any other, and unfortunately that means sometimes I’ve had t’ use lethal force. There was a bandit attack when I was living in Brightscale that I helped defend against, and I killed some bandits during that raid, including the bandit captain leading the attack. That was my first really big battle.

14. What kind of animal are you?

I in’t an animal...

15. Name your worst habits?

When I fall deep asleep I tend t’ snore pretty loudly. Val used t’ joke about smothering me in my sleep just so she could get some sleep of her own.

I’ve also been described as having a “savior’s complex.” Like, I just want t’ help people. I don’t mean it in a bad way, but some people’ve responded less than favorably t’ me tryin’ t’ help.

16. Do you look up to anyone at all?

Raz. My friend is trying so hard t’ make things right that he doesn’t realize he has already. I’m not sure I would’ve been able t’ step away from the life he was leading if our lives were switched. It takes a lot of willpower t’ stay away from stuff like that after falling into it.

17. Are you gay, straight or bisexual?

I’m straight.

18. Do you go to school?

No. When Raz and I ran away as teenagers that was the last I’d gone t’ school.

19. Ever want to marry and have kids one day?

I never want t’ marry again now that Mynai’s my wife, and I in’t losing her.

We’ve talked about having kids, and we both want to, but we’d have t’ be careful about when we do. Ariya’s normal has already been changed once in a pretty drastic way, and I’d want her t’ be ready and understand that she’d be having a little brother or sister. So, for now, Mynai and I are being careful t’ not conceive until everything’s right.

20. Do you have any fangirls/fanboys?

None that I know of, but I do get t’ meet some grateful people around New Coalfell. They help the job feel rewarding.

21. What are you most afraid of?

Anything happening t’ my family. I went through the pain of losing one wife, and I couldn’t do it again. I don’t even want t’ think about losing my daughter.

22. What do you usually wear?

Just a white collared shirt and trousers at home. When I’m on patrol I wear my guardsman uniform with chain mail armor underneath. It’s good protection, but gets really hot in summers.

23. What’s one food that tempts you?

Okay, so Val used t’ own a bakery, and she used t’ make this one meal that I hadn’t heard of before her. It was, like, this dough that had tomatoes mashed into a sauce on it with cheese and some meats, all baked in a stone oven. Not really a pastry, and not really bread either. It was divine.

24. Am I annoying to you?

*shakes his head*

25. Well, it’s still not over!

Okay.

26. What class are you (low/middle/high)?

Middle I guess? We in’t struggling with our money, but we couldn’t buy some of them nicer places out there either.

27. How many friends do you have?

I’ve got a nice handful of friends; a strong community around me here.

28. What are your thoughts on pie?

Val and I would make pie in her bakery on days where I was off-duty sometimes.

29. Favorite drink?

Apple juice.

...oh, like alcoholic? Red wine.

30. What’s your favorite place?

Our home back when Val and I were living in Brightscale. It was a total wreck when I first showed up there, and Val got a lot of people t’ help me rebuild it after the bandit attack. It was right by a river, so when we were drifting off t’ sleep we could hear the water rushing by. We were also separated a bit from the rest of the town, so it was like our own small piece of paradise as a family. I loved the walk back t’ it from work.

Unfortunately Brightscale became a ghost town after the plague hit, and Ariya and I were forced t’ leave it behind when all the survivors migrated t’ Boulder. Val’s ashes are buried there. Sometime I’d like t’ take Ariya back, but I don’t know what that area’s even like anymore. Could be bandits in the area, or predators, or anything. I’d want t’ make sure it’s safe first.

31. Are you interested in anyone?

*Terasas points to his wedding ring*

32. That was a stupid question…

A little bit, no offense...

33. Would you rather swim in a lake or the ocean?

Lake.

34. What’s your type?

Uh, my type? Honestly I in’t been with enough women t’ have a type, but if I had t’ say it’d be intelligent women who are outspoken. Confidence goes a long way for me, but not arrogance. She has t’ be kind too.

I tend t’ first notice a woman’s eyes first. I don’t know why, but a woman with beautiful eyes seems t’ be what catches my attention.

35. Any fetishes?

F...f-fetishes? N-no...I mean, everyone’s got things they enjoy doing in bed, but I don’t think it counts as a fetish...

Wait, what am I saying? None of this is your godsdamned business! No one needs t’ know I like doggyst...- wait, I didn’t say that before! Delete this part! Delete this p-

36. Camping or outdoors?

*Terasas straightens himself, brushing down his ruffled fur while clearing his throat* What was that? Camping or outdoors? Ooh, what a great, perfectly normal question like all the other ones you’ve asked so far.

Camping. When I feel like it’s safe out I like taking Ariya out for a few nights like my pa used to when I was little. She in’t a big fan of the hunting part of it, so I usually do that by myself along with the skinning and cleaning of the meat afterwards. We have a good time sitting around the fire afterwards eating together. I hope she enjoys it too. I know those memories of my own father mean so much t’ me, and I hope it’s the same for her.

#terasas #terasas feldspar #catfolk #khajiit #oc interview #tabaxi #coalfell #rogue: the razimarr quartz story #rogue #my writing #ask about my ocs #my ocs

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homosociallyyours · 6 years ago

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Top 5 Harry tour suits!

OOOOH thank you!!!! What a good ask! I can’t actually rank these because my #1 fave changes sometimes/there’s more than one. But here are 5 utter faves. And I know it makes me a monster, but I’m not gonna put up pics because I don’t wanna steal edits and the fashion archive posts weren’t popping up to give me a safe source :( so there’s links instead.

1) Glasgow: The KiltWhen I saw the pics from this show I think I started crying. I was at work and I remember showing the photos around saying, “look at my boy, my beautiful baby, wearing a kilt and looking so free and happy!!!”

2) Mexico City: The Juan Gabriel Fringe SuitListen, as someone who owns more than one be-fringed garment (I took my college senior pics in a floor length deep orange dress with a plunging fringe neckline, ok?) I was on board with this look from the get go. That it was done in Mexico City and referenced famous gay Mexican crooner Juan Gabriel? Well. That sold me, hard. I’m love.

3) Milan: She Sporkle ThoughOnce again, I believe I was at work for this suit. We got the toothbrushing pic and I was besotted by the glitter. So much of it!! I used to be a big glitter fan. More so than fringe, tbh. I’ve had to leave it behind because I don’t party enough and I work around food, and as we know glitter is forever. But this glittery little imp of a suit had my whole heart from the get go. AND! It stands in nicely as an example of all his sparkly gucci suits, any one of which would make me happy to own or to see again.

4) Toronto: Bunnies and Snakes and Intricate PatternsALRIGHT!!! I still have a picture saved of this suit so that one day. ONE. DAY. I can buy the world’s coziest pink sweatshirt and recreate this beauty with black puffy paint. Yeah, that’s right. My dream is to live in 24/7 Harry Styles cosplay, I said what I said and I won’t be judged. Seriously though, I showed a pic of the designs to my friend who uses puffy paint as one of her preferred art media (click that link, her shit is so beautiful) and asked how long she thought it would take her to recreate it. She said a few hours, and I took that to mean it would take me like 4-6 months at least. But that would be worth it.

5) The O2 Night One/The Forum Night Two: The Velvet PrinceYeah, I’m cheating. IDC. The jacket from the O2 is gorgeous: the pale shade of pink makes me think of crushed flower petals underfoot or the lighting in that scene from But I’m a Cheerleader where Graham and Megan kiss softly inside the little playhouse before being found out and separated; it’s a lesbian fever dream sewn up with gold and placed on the body of one of the only boys I would ever wanna call a lesbian icon (@ me or don’t, I delete haters for breakfast). But. BUT!!!! I was at the Forum on that second night! I saw him come out in the black version of that jacket and felt my heart soar live and in person. And then I swear to god, I know I sound like a cracked nut, but that child smiled in my direction and then looked in my eyes and gave me the weirdest look, like a complete WTF??? look that I still feel in my soul (I still feel it because it confused the fuck outta me. I’ve chosen to believe he thought I was an odd looking drag queen) and he was wearing that suit, and so I LOVE IT. That’s how I remember Harry. In the black version of the lesbian fever dream velvet jacket, looking at me with confusion once and only once. It’s all I have.

Anyway, if you’re still with me…I’m not sorry for that last bit. But I am sorry this is only a top 5. So! Here’s some honorable mentions!-Paris: A simple look, but lovely! Lightly sparkly, a nice frilly v neck, absolutely something I would steal if possible. Also him in this suit was my phone background for months. -Hamburg: I love a pattern. Sue me. But only like “Hiii Suuuuue!” because truly WWHD?-San Jose: I was at this show too and ugh, ugh, UGH! The suit was so pretty I just wanted to see closeups of it right away!! It’s like a painting, so delicate and yet vibrant. Also I was so scared after seeing the Sacramento suit that I’d be scarred for life (by having his dick put way too much in my line of vision, No Thanks) so the relief of seeing that beautiful vision of a suit really makes this one extra nice. -Detroit/St.Paul/Denver/Seattle: I am a sucker for that stupid fuckin shirt, y’all. I love it. I LOVE IT! I would’ve worn it in a bunch of colors all over the place too. I still would. @ harry, please see about getting that same shirt made for me in size fat, with tiddies. Or just. Wear that look again, kid. It was gorge.

Let’s talk about this again!! Go look at the tour looks again and reply with your personal faves/tell me I’m a screwed up mess for skipping them. Or indulge me by reblogging this post and pretending this is valid discourse. (Alternatively, send me more top 5 asks!!)

#1d #disgruntledkittenface #answers #harry styles #hslot18 #tour suits #opinions #top 5 #hs tour 2018

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koganphrancis · 6 years ago

Photo

Camless Episode 2 Recap

(I can’t give a credit to the gif maker because they deleted their post right after I saved this gif and before I could click back and get their Tumblr url, so, sorry! If anyone else would be interested in giffing this moment, please do-looks like there might almost be some butt crack in it for us, and that would officially make this the most interesting moment in the episode.)

Once again the best thing I can say about this episode is there was not even a whisper of a mention of Terror ;)

But the rest of the show-I really don’t recognize anything from what the show used to be. This is truly like a brand new Showtime show using some of the same actors from Shameless. No one reminds you of how their character used to be. They’re all like those Lego people Emmy’s always bragging about using when she directs episodes-plastic and stiff and lifeless.

Also, this episode had zero sex scenes, which must have been confusing to its core audience that keeps insisting the show is still worth watching. I’m sure they missed the tits.

Like last week, I’ll just run down the characters, if I can stay awake.

Frank. Ugh. They gave him this incredibly moronic scene in The Alibi where he rallies his fellow white men against “reverse racism” and you could see how hard Macy was working to try to grind out the lines, but it just stunk. I’m sure the showrunners think they’re coming up with cutting edge social commentary here, but they’re not. The audience has long been clued into the fact that Frank’s motivations behind his machinations are to serve one thing and one thing only, and that’s Frank himself. He will go whichever way the wind blows. If not being a Make Southside Great Again cretin would’ve got him some money in his pocket, he would’ve been making speeches against everything he was saying last night. Archie Bunker was an iconic character in the advancement of social progress because he did believe the shit he said, and the audience was in on the fact that he was dead wrong. When Frank says racist bullshit, it’s not “shameless” it’s not commentary, it’s a lazy fuck wanting something for nothing. It has nothing to do with improvement or education of the viewer. Shameless has this unrealistic view of itself being a show “about” something, and when it inevitably fails to hit the mark, they just guffaw and say we weren’t supposed to take it seriously, it’s just a comedy, it’s just Shameless. Well, you’ve cried wolf too many times and I can’t take anything you say as meaningful.

Also, this and almost every other storyline last night took the most laborious routes possible to get the characters to their next plot point. Frank only got involved in local politics because he needed beer money (what happened to his one beer a day with the new liver? Oh yeah, that was a different character on a different show). And why the fuck would the patrons of The Alibi put money into anything Frank’s going to be in charge of? Are they that stupid?

Fiona and Bored Their lack of chemistry continues to astound. Their conversations make no sense. Bored clearly doesn’t give a shit what Fiona does, so why does he insist on giving his opinion that, once it pisses her off, he just drops it? Why say anything to begin with? And I only watch their scenes once, so I might be wrong on this, but he leaves me with the impression that he squints every time he speaks. It’s as if he saw Dirty Harry at an early age and vowed to himself if he ever became an actor, his delivery of all his lines would be just like Clint growling out, “Do you feel lucky, punk? Do you?”

Anyway, Fiona’s circuitous route has her going to the Gallagher house to find shoes she left there when she moved into her own apartment. The fuck? You gotta try so hard as a writer these days to get any of the family together-it’s another piece of the “old” show that is missing more and more lately, and really ripping the show apart at its already weakened seams.

She has a big power meeting with a commercial real estate developer now that Ian’s bail money is burning a hole in her pocket. (And, the fuck? Ian turns down her offer to post bail so she figures he had his shot and if he changes his mind and wants-or worse yet NEEDS-to get out of jail he’s shit out of luck? They could’ve had her make sure he understood it was a one-time offer, but no.) Anyway, for said meeting, she’s wearing what looks like a kimono from a day spa and to complete the look she needs the pair of red fuck me pumps that she finds in a small box that looks like it’s only holding said pumps and one work boot. She left that behind? Couldn’t squeeze it into the new place?

When she arrives back home at the Gallagher house, she finds Liam sitting on the couch and asks him why he’s not at school. (Forget that, why isn’t SHE taking care of him, she’s his legal guardian!!!!) He tells her he got kicked out because of Frank, Fi asks what did he do, Liam says, “The moms”, clue laugh track that this show totally needs now. Fiona brings Liam along with her-he clues her in to how rich folk talk, and she tells the real estate guy Liam’s her intern, a prodigy, cue laugh track. She has a bullshit meeting with the guy, tries to throw her boyfriend’s name around to prove she has clout (and hey, he has a last name now! It’s Kellogg, but who will bother to remember that?), uses her patented Fiona looking at real estate phrase when she says a building he showed her has “good bones”. She’s so obviously bullshitting the guy and we can see her losing her money happening a mile away. She, however, thinks she’s playing the dick just right. There’s a scene towards the end where she’s begging to throw her $50K at him, but he says you need $100K to get in, and she says she has it??? I couldn’t be bothered to go back and watch it again to see if at any point she indicates where she’ll come up with twice the money she has, I’m just assuming she’s going to gamble the entire apartment building and lose it all. And that WILL be believable because she has no business experience that’s not straight out of fantasyland and the only thing that will bother me is they seem to be setting it up that Bored is right and she should listen to him like a good little woman.

Lip Lip’s storyline is no longer about Lip, it’s about all the people he keeps taking on as projects. Last night Xan abandoned the Ball twins she was babysitting to run off with a stolen wallet (what is it with this show thinking child endangerment is funny?). To nitpick-if Liam was supposed to be in school, shouldn’t Xan have been at hers too? Last week they made a point of saying she forged a note to her teacher to go to Brad’s wedding...

Anyway, since this new show thinks it’s normal for 24 year old guys to do nothing but parent kids that aren’t theirs and be a one man support system for their mentor and their sponsor (but not their brother), Lip’s taking on a new project, being the reluctant sponsor of a drug and alcohol addict who has an adorable baby. Lip tries telling Brad that “Gallaghers aren’t sponsors, they have sponsors” (I’m so sick of “Gallagher” pronouncements like that), but in the end, he can see the guy has no one, so he steps in. And if I could trust this show for one minute I’d be intrigued by this (it’s much more realistic than the whole Xan bullshit)-it’s interesting to think Lip can relate to the baby being with the dad while he was passed out for two solid days more than he relates to the dad-but I just feel like they’ll handle it badly and I’m not going to get attached to the baby or the dad.

Debbie She’s shrilly screaming for equal pay and equal rights, but I get the feeling all of that was her circuitous route to meeting this season’s love interest. It’ll be interesting to see if she keeps up her crusade or if all that’s forgotten once she’s getting sex.

We first see her rattling off statistics from computer print outs, which is a refreshing change from Ian memorizing the Bible overnight, but still. The stats she’s reading are unfair and horrific, but the people she’s telling them to are in no position to change things. Debbie takes her “cause” to job sites where again, she’s shouting into the void, since no women are working there and even if they were, what does she expect them to do? This whole “Norma Rae” thing makes no sense because licensed workers ARE unionized and if the jobs she’s visiting are using under the table workers, no one wants this loud mouth teenager and her baby carriage calling attention to it. What is she trying to accomplish?

So, like I said, all the screaming is probably just the set up to her meet cute with the chick she thought was a dude. Said chick comes to the Gallagher house (claiming she found it because Debbie was screaming her full name and saying she was a welder with a vagina-so good to know everyone in Chicago would know where that person lives...) and does the “big reveal” that she’s a woman. Debs/Emma is all, “Dafuuuuuck?” and Alex winds up asking her out for a drink. At home I’m thinking, “Aw, damn, Alex, you’re gonna get roofied!”

Carl Carl is moronic as fuck this week-more so than usual. He tries to see his local congressperson (who is secure in his seat and not running in the same election as Frank’s tampering with, I guess?) and is told by an assistant the list of things Carl will need to get a recommendation for West Point and to come back in 9 weeks. Carl totally ignores most of the list, the scholastic and athletic achievements-does he really think he’ll get in without it all? Can’t he just ask Ian what he’ll need to do? Oh wait, no one knows Ian-I’m thinking of that other show again.

He starts on a quest to find volunteer work (since court ordered post juvie hours don’t count-cue laugh track), and asks at the first place “if it pays”. Right there, he’s too stupid to get into any reputable school, why are people wasting their time with him?

He winds up working for a retired veterinarian who uses an unconventional but cheaper and effective way to euthanize dogs. The show goes totally off the rails, having Carl “rescue” them and taking them home to die a “natural” death in his basement instead. Is the writer so stupid she doesn’t know that that’s just forcing the dogs to live out their days in pain, or are we only supposed to think it’s Carl that is that stupid? Either way, why go there Shameless? Why drag innocent dogs into your “it’s Shameless!” world of the unfunny?

Kev and Vee Their painful role as the show’s family sitcom portion continues. (side note: I was cackling with glee when I heard Bob Saget will be making a guest appearance-I called that Full House vibe from the start!) They’re checking out preschools and the first place they go, the woman who runs it is dressed as a full on fairy princess. As if that wouldn’t be enough of a red flag to GTFO. When they hear the cost of tuition, K&V flip out. Because, ya know, they had no idea daycare/preschool was expensive? Have they been hit with the same stupid stick as Carl? They get a lead on a Catholic school that’s in their price range, but there’s only one spot! What to do? Easy, just tell their obviously not identical twin daughters that one of them always has to keep out of sight at school and that from now on, they’re both “Amy”. Cue laugh track.

Ian Oh man, why isn’t Cam gone already? This week starts with him performing the prison yard triple wedding. He’s speaking in the cadence and manner of a preacher, yet he’s only been to 2 weddings that he can recall? Does he watch You Tube videos of sermons now? It makes no sense! Anyway, a guard tells him he’s made bail, and all lame, choreographed hell breaks loose as the prisoners want “Father” Gallagher to finish the ceremony.

Next time we see him, he has at least half an inch more hair and he’s being released back into society, wearing the clothes he was arrested in 9 months ago. The handmade God Loves Fags T shirt is better than some of the things I’ve seen Cam wearing in real life lately, but I digress. Geneva is waiting for him and is jumping and yipping all over him like an overexcited puppy. He tries telling her, “I really wasn’t done in there-those guys need me.” She’s not listening as she tells him “so much exciting stuff has been happening” (off screen-there’s nothing exciting happening on the show itself)-”We have sponsorships now, we’re in 45 states, 1 mil strong on Insta, we’re getting some of the conversion centers closed down.” And, just, you lost me with the hyperbole. Say they’ve spread to 3 states or something believable, not almost the entire continental US. Anyway, she tells him they crowd sourced his bail and asks if he’s ready to face his public. He just looks dazed and confused. A little group is waiting for him behind a (as in one, solo) police barrier.

Next time we see him, he’s being delivered to the Church of Gay Jesus in a luxury SUV. People are waiting there to greet him too-some wearing unintentionally hilarious masks of Ian’s face-well, really GJ, but come on, that’s Cam!!!

Geneva asks him if he’s okay and he says “Yeah, just used to being in lock up.” Again, Cam’s not giving us much to work with, but I guess we’re supposed to see that he’s already overwhelmed and doesn’t want to be part of this anymore? Geneva introduces him to a bunch of workers for the GJ movement that have actual titles-they’re practically a corporation now, then drags him inside where he’s going to make a press statement and take selfies with donors that gave one thousand dollars or more for his bail. Ian looks down at the index cards with his statement and reads aloud, “My harrowing and abusive time in jail? Prison was inspiring...” Geneva is officially his new Terror and dismisses anything he has to say. She tells him to just emphasize his oppression as a gay man and the daily violence he endured.” Which, yes, hello, that actually WOULD be his experience in jail, but the show chose to make it cute and sweet. Grrrr.

Ian doesn’t have a reply to that, I guess, so he looks at a map on the wall with a bunch of pins in it and asks what it is. Geneva tells him it’s where they’ve blown up vans, and they’re going to do more in his name. He seems genuinely upset. Guess he’s missing out on the fact that he could meet more fireman if he keeps blowing up vans-opportunity missed, John Wells!!!

Another disciple comes up to Geneva with an old timey prison striped shirt for Ian to put on for his statement. Just like Jerome wore for so many scenes in Gotham. I don’t know if the show thinks it’s a clever nod to Cam’s other job every time they do something like this, but to me it just pulls me out of the story and I go off on a thought tangent yet again, thinking about how much more realistic Gotham had handled all Cam’s prison stuff. But I digress. Ian says, “Am I allowed to take a piss?” which, really? That’s how the kids talk these days? He wouldn’t say “go to the bathroom”? Whatever. He goes into the bathroom, stares at his reflection because that must be in his contract, stuffs the prison shirt into the trash, flips down the baby changing table, and uses it to escape out the window, flashing the camera a shot of those ugly ass blue shoes with the gold heel coverings.

In his final scene of the night, Ian is sitting in the dark in the Gallagher kitchen, undoubtedly thinking about the huge-probably life altering-mistake he made. I’m referring of course, to when TPTB at Gotham sold him on the “Jerome has an unknown twin!” storyline. Carl comes up from the basement and the two of them share the most awkward scene since the British version of “The Matches”, as told by Eddie Izzard: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qfw60qXtOH0 Oh look! He’s wearing a spa kimono-like garment too!

Anyway, Cameron and Ethan stiltedly say some lines as if neither of them has ever acted before, and Carl goes to make his escape quite rapidly, but not before we get proof (not that we needed any) that no one’s been visiting Ian in prison, and that when Fiona visited, she didn’t bother keeping him up on family news in the 9 MONTHS he’s been gone.

Ian: Who’s the girl in my bed? Carl: Peyton List? (I know I was confused-Lip’s been sleeping in Ian’s bed, Xan’s over in the corner where Carl and Kassidi-remember her? She’s dead now-slept.) Let me try again:

Carl: That’s Xan-Lip’s kid. Ian:... Doesn’t really react to that either. I HOPE what all this is driving at is that Ian doesn’t feel like he belongs anywhere anymore-he doesn’t want to be part of the huge nationwide movement that Gay Jesus has turned into, he shouldn’t want to be in jail/prison even if there will always be gay men there, he doesn’t belong at “home” where they don’t even have a bed for him and all the kids except Liam are out of the nest now. For Ian, home is not a place, it’s a caring, loving man with blue eyes and an ass that won’t quit...

#Recap #Season Nein Episode 2

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taeliciousdaelicious · 6 years ago

Text

Of Binary Codes and Blue Candies || jhs

Genre: Action, fluff (idk to what extent), gang!AU, humor (if you squint hard enough)

Pairing/s: freelance hacker!You and hacker!Hseok

Description: “Oh my gosh, I lost to you and I’m fracking laughing at it.” —; part of the Lacerta series

Sequence of events: myg, knj, jjk, jhs, ksj, pjm, kth

Word Count: 4,726

Note/s: Mentions of characters from the other installments of the Lacerta series. Also, I don’t know a thing about hacking. I just researched at the last minute and I’m still pretty sure it’s not 100% enough or accurate. Pretty sure Google is watching my IP address, though.

The e-mail that you received had been shady enough. Yet, you attributed your lack of self-preservation to the fact that you were a month behind on rent and your bills were starting to pile up. So, without any question—just like what the said e-mail instructed—you accepted the job. You convinced yourself it would be worth it since the pay would easily amount to three average-level assignments. And above all else, hacking is delicate work. You’d rather have this one than three more of this for the same price. Or so you thought.

Now that you were staring at the computer screen, however, you couldn’t help but focus on the twitching of your left eye. Anxiety was starting to bubble up, slowly climbing up your throat. You forced it down, trying to keep calm and rational. The network you were tasked to infiltrate... It wasn’t simple, to say the least. Whoever owned it must have been a highly-cautious man or woman, seeing as the difficulty of hacking it was on par with a government system or a worldwide organization. You took in a deep breath before popping a blue gummy candy into your mouth. Briefly, you remembered it being advertised as ‘organic’, prompting you to think about of that one, memorable school lab experiment with gummy bears.

While you chewed, you could feel yourself slowly calming down now that your mouth had something to do. Your friends had called you out, saying you had an oral fixation or something. You had never heard of such a thing before so you didn’t think much of it. That was, until another friend mentioned that she could match you up with someone who “would make full use and thoroughly enjoy” your oral fixation (which you still deny to this day since it sounds like a load of baloney).

Realizing that your mind had wandered off, you shook your head vigorously before focusing your eyes on the screen. Cracking your knuckles, you decided that it was time to suck it up and get to work.

Of-fucking-course, it would be hard to hack into right off the bat. You already wasted two hours of your life trying but to no avail. Whoever this person was that required your services clearly forgot that you needed some information so you could actually do what you needed to do. Pinching the bridge of your nose, you took deep, steadying breaths before deciding to leave an e-mail of inquiry. You weren’t prepared for the reply, though.

“Oh, are you fucking kidding me now? Really? What have I gotten myself into?” you questioned out loud although no one could hear you. You read the e-mail again, just in case you were reading it wrong. You groaned when you deduced that you weren’t dreaming and that it was, in fact, real. It seemed that you had drawn the short lot in this life. “Lacerta. Whoever the fuck you are, I am skinning you alive if I ever find you.”

Tracing where the e-mail was sent from had been very tempting but judging the person’s character through the concise and curt messages, he or she must be smart enough not to let a hacker track them down. It was just your luck that you were tasked to go against the city’s most notorious gang. You sent another e-mail, asking if you could drop out of whatever this was. However, the response had been immediate. ‘Think about your decision very carefully, Y/N.’

Great, so now you can untangle yourself from this. Biting your lower lip, you popped another gummy candy into your mouth to de-stress. The sweetness brought a sharp pang to your senses and you positioned yourself again for work. You did your best on gathering information about Lacerta, getting in-touch with your contacts in the field for some help to acquire some data to reduce the time spent on this. The faster you finish, the better.

It was late into the night when the first stage of your hacking job was considered well and truly done. You stretched on your seat, yawning widely. Your eyes burned from reading over lines and lines of information flashing on your computer screen for the past couple of hours. Still, you’re not done hustling. It was time to see the chinks of the proverbial armor of Lacerta’s database.

“Client wants me to hack via the Internet or wireless LAN. The git. Making my job harder than it has to be” you muttered under your breath. What you weren’t admitting was that you were mildly relieved by that. At least, you didn’t have to sneak into wherever their base may be and do who knows what that might get you into more trouble or worse.

After setting up all the hacking tools you thought and knew would be applicable for whatever you had in mind, you collapsed on the couch backed up against a wall. “Alright, time to get some shut-eye, Y/N.”

You nursed a mug of coffee as you blearily blinked at the computer. Now that you had found the weakness in their system, you were determined to set your plan in motion. Yawning widely, you placed the mug down before cracking your knuckles.

“Alright, time to work” you muttered to yourself. Soon enough, your fingers were flying through the keys. The incessant clacking was the only thing heard in the otherwise silent room. And by all means, everything that happened afterwards wasn’t what you expected.

For starters, it seemed suspiciously easy to break into their system. It only took a few rifling and sorting through the data flashing through the screens in your room to find the file you were supposed to extract. Quickly, still apprehensive, you transferred it into your hard drive (your just in case Plan B if stuff happened to you) before completely erasing it from Lacerta’s system. Then, for a wild second, you paused, long enough to attract attention from whoever was keeping their database secure. And yet, no attacks were being launched your way. Either the person on the other side was a really lax one or incompetent. Still, you weren’t about to stay just to get caught. With a bark of disbelieving laughter, you left your signature before doing a scan of your own system, double-checking that you were as clean as could be.

Don’t freak out too much. I’m pretty sure no one would miss someone’s cheating footage, right? — Gray Hat

In retrospect, it was kind of stupid to think that it was the last of it. However, you were sorely wrong, as proven to you three days after that job. You had just paid your rent after your shift down the local restobar when your phone buzzed in your pocket. Closing your front door, you kicked off your shoes as you fished it out. The message flashing on the screen made you stop in your tracks.

From: Unknown Number So, Gray Hat. Let me guess, the dude in the video asked you to remove it, yes? (Received 10:13 P.M.)

It was from an unknown number. You didn’t know how that person got hold of you but it felt like a bucket of ice was doused over you at the implications. Your mind was already jumping to conclusions, thinking you were about to suffer repercussions from the job you took. You bitterly cursed your last client in the confines of your mind before the sudden continuous ping of your phone made you jump in shock.

From: Unknown Number

Either ways, that’s not the point. The point is this

How the fuck did you manage to hack into the database without setting off the alarms I placed

Dude/Dudette (Received 10:14 P.M.)

It only wailed like a siren after detecting the file you deleted without admin permission

Also, is ‘Gray Hat’ a codename or something

Or that’s just you identifying yourself as a literal gray hat

Please answer me

I hope that didn’t sound too demanding (Received 10:15 P.M.)

You decide to address each of his queries one by one.

To: Unknown Number

Gray hat as in the hacker term gray hat

It’s dudette

Also, that’s a secret I’m not sure I am willing to tell

What’s in it for me? (Sent 10:16 P.M.)

From: Unknown Number

Thank god you’re smart

Also thanks for answering

I’m a dude btw just getting it out there

I thought I had to track you down for a one-on-one

So listen (Received 10:17 P.M.)

I have a proposal, gray hat dudette (Received 10:18 P.M.)

You couldn’t help but snort in derision at his words. A proposal? Who in their right mind would agree to an anonymous person’s proposal? The mystery client from the last had taught you enough lesson. You wouldn’t fall for this kind of thing again. Yet, you couldn’t help but read the rest of his texts when you received them.

From: Unknown Number

Would you be willing to

Like hmmmmmm

Meet up??? ?? ? (Received 10:19 P.M.)

Because

I might or might not want to offer you a job (Received 10:20 P.M.)

Staring at your screen for a full minute, it still took you some time before you could formulate a coherent answer. Your hands trembled faintly even as you typed it out.

From: Unknown Number

I don’t know what kind of game you’re trying to play, pal

But seriously (Sent 10:24 P.M.)

Please do stop trolling me

Delete my number

Don’t even attempt tracking me down (Sent 10:25 P.M.)

I will report you to the police (Sent 10:26 P.M.)

From: Unknown Number

Phew

Thought you blocked me

Although

That’s a funny thought (Received 10:27 P.M.)

What are you gonna tell the police

“The person I hacked is contacting me please stop him”

I don’t think you’ll get out of that complaint unscathed, dudette (Received 10:28 P.M.)

“This fucking git” you vehemently hissed. You were typing furiously when he suddenly flooded your phone again with messages.

From: Unknown Number

Okay you know what

How about this (Received 10:28 P.M.)

Let’s meet and talk in the police station

Just say at the front desk that you’re there to meet Blue

Does that make it better for you? (Received 10:29 P.M.)

If anything, it made you more apprehensive. You exited the messaging app just to check your e-mail for the details. Your client made it clear that it was Lacerta you were hacking three days prior. So, if this male was really a part of Lacerta, what possessed him to suggest meeting in a police station?

You decided to ignore his messages. Chucking your phone on your couch, you went through the motions of preparing yourself some dinner—the usual fare of microwavable food—before settling down to eat it and watch some movies. Soon enough, you forgot the anonymous person who was bothering you earlier as you got immersed in the show you were watching. However, a soft ‘ping’ sounded from your laptop. You put the bowl on the coffee table and checked your e-mail notification. What you found made your heart pound a little harder against your ribcage.

From: [email protected]

To: [email protected]

Cute mail address. Also, a friendly reminder that I know how and where to find you. :) (Received 11:54 P.M.)

Fucking hell.

So it went without further ado that you would meet him at the police station, as crazy as it sounded. Heck, even you felt like you were losing your mind at the very thought of a possible member of a wanted gang in a building housing the very people who are out to get them. You unlocked your phone and dug the messages from last night, prompted by the stranger’s unwelcome e-mail.

To: Blue

For fuck’s sake

Alright fine, you git

We already established what you wanted

What’s in it for me

And how do I really know that I am not being conned or anything into this

Be honest or I swear I will start hacking with a malevolent intent for the first time in my life (Sent 11:55 P.M.)

From: Blue

Wow

You type fast, woman

Also

We’ll be paying to pay you whatever amount you are willing to work for (Received 11:56 P.M.)

But within reason!

We don’t shit gold nuggets okay

Also a heads up

You might or might not end up working with me

As for reassurance that you won’t be hacked to pieces (Received 11:57 P.M.)

There will be a police officer waiting outside of the station

He’ll be sporting an outrageous hair color

Neon yellow (Received 11:58 P.M.)

Tell him that you’re there to meet Blue

He’ll take you inside

If he doesn’t he has a gun in a holster strapped to his hip okay

If all else fails, pepper spray is the way

So see you tomorrow, Hatter (Received 11:59 P.M.)

You reviewed the messages again before looking straight ahead. The light changed and you crossed the road, feeling your nerves spike up gradually. The police station was a few blocks away and your steps grew considerably slower, displaying your reluctance. Still, at least it seemed that Blue was telling the truth or maybe it was coincidence. A person in a police uniform was standing right outside the doors leading to the station. He wore a formidable scowl... which was a contrast to his neon yellow hair. People stared as they passed by, to which the man only scowled further.

You were worried his face will disappear and cave into itself when he scowled even more when you approached him. Feeling a little silly, you hesitated. However, you remembered the messages you exchanged with Blue. Steeling yourself, you opened your mouth and boldly said, “I’m here to see Blue.”

His face slackened for a moment. You worried you got the wrong person when he suddenly blurted out, “No way, it was a girl who hacked into Lacerta?”

That instantly made you bristle in anger and frustration. It seemed that there was still some prejudice against women. Also, his choice of words and his tone felt a little too depreciating and condescending than you liked. Squaring your shoulders, you raised your chin haughtily as you hotly retorted, “Is there a problem, sir? Maybe you’d like me to dig deep and accidentally unearth your secrets just to prove my skills? But then again, I don’t have to prove myself to narrow-minded moose like you.”

“Narrow-minded—? What the fu—”

“Officer? I was under the impression that you were here to escort her inside, not insult her with your deep-rooted sexism due to societal stereotypes. Hatter, good to see you, by the way. I thought you wouldn’t come until I saw you pass through one of the CCTV cameras lining the path.”

You blinked blankly at the man that suddenly appeared, the door beside the police officer held open as he looked at you expectantly. The first thing you noticed was how excessively blue his outfit was. Still, it looked good on him. Pastel blue button-up and dark blue slacks. Then, you realized he called you ‘Hatter’, the moniker Blue from last night called you.

“Blue?” you tentatively called him. You were rewarded by a blinding smile. You fought the urge to hold a hand in front of your face to block your eyes from the brilliance. He jerked his head, wordlessly inviting you inside. Sneaking a glance at the officer still scowling at the two of you, you squeezed yourself into the narrow opening. You tried not to brush against him as you took in the interior.

“We’re going to talk in the conference room. Hey, Detective! Tell Namjoon not to bust a nut just yet. Hatter just arrived” he called out to one of the people milling around in the station, a woman giving him something between a stink eye and a look of amusement. Her gaze casually slid towards yours, her lips quirking to a smile.

“A word of advice: you really don’t have a say in the matter. Just skin him alive with the benefits you’d like to receive” she told you. The two of you watched her walk away while tapping on her phone.

“Right, let’s get inside” he said to break the silence that settled awkwardly. “This way, Hatter.”

He ushered you inside the conference room and closed the door, isolating you from everyone else. You noted, with a wave of relief, that the blinds weren’t closed and the door wasn’t locked. It meant that if anything went wrong, someone from outside would see and you could make a quick escape. Your attention was caught when Blue cleared his throat.

“First off, you can call me Hoseok or Hobi. I don’t care about the honorifics or what unless there are other members around us” he started without preamble. “Also, if you want, I can keep calling you Hatter or you can share your name to me. Your choice, really.”

You snorted at that, unable to help yourself when you replied, “I’m pretty sure you did a background check on me already, Hoseok.”

Hoseok raised an eyebrow before smirking in amusement. “I see that you’re blunt and fast to pick up on things. Great. So, I’m offering you a job in Lacerta because a.) we’re kind of in the middle of a... thing right now and with the way you hacked into our system, your skills impressed me—impressed us—and unanimously made the decision of contacting you to hire you for that. Also, because we need someone else to help us in that thing that I mentioned.”

“Translation: I’m useful and it would make more sense to hire me than kill me. Next” you nonchalantly said. Hoseok shot you a look for interrupting him but nevertheless continued.

“Anyways, b.) I’m asking you to please say yes because Namjoon will throw me into a river full of alligators if your decision is otherwise. Look, I was sleep-deprived during that time and he was furious that I let such a slip-up happen. Please, save my ass. Like what Miss Detective said earlier, you can skin me alive with the benefits that you’d like to receive.”

You gave his pleading look a hard stare before deeply sighing. “Alligators only eat dead things” you mumbled.

“Is that seriously the only thing you caught from my rant?” he asked you, narrowing his eyes a little. You rolled your eyes and leaned on the table, pinning him down with your eyes.

“What does this... job entail?” you asked almost hesitantly, afraid that it might ask more than what you could possibly and are willing to give.

Immediately, he answered, “It just a behind-the-scenes thing. You’ll do what you do best: hacking. You won’t get to be sent on the field. Don’t worry about that. However, you might have to talk to Lacerta members at times.”

You frowned at how vague his description was. Unsatisfied, you crossed your arms and prodded further, “Don’t be so stingy with details. What else am I supposed to know.”

“All other things are classified unless you agree to work with us.” He paused for a moment before saying, “But all I’m going to tell you right now is that we need you because we have a conflict with Cepheus right now.”

He simply took in the disbelieving expression on your face. Cepheus? As in the rumored rival gang of Lacerta? Maybe you were in deeper shit than you thought. Still, you were still thinking of the money and benefits. You weren’t about to shoot his proposal down just because of a little danger. After all, what is life without some thrill?

“Based on what you saw of my skills, how much are you willing to pay me to work for you guys?” When he rattled off the amount, your eyes went as wide as saucers before blurting out, “Holy fuck, sign me up. Just please, can I have a bodyguard to accompany me at all times? Also, keep my family out of this.”

“What happened to skinning me alive for benefits?” he joked.

“I will, just much later when I can think more properly. Also, there’s no contract on paper yet. We’ll need that if you’re going to hire me. I refuse to go by words.”

He nodded in assent. “Alright. Also, there’s a spare room in our main house if you feel like your current place is less secure.”

You merely raised an eyebrow at his words before standing up. “I think we’re done here. I have to go now. My shift at work starts in less than two hours.”

He hummed before saying, “I’ll send you a draft of the contract later via e-mail. Also, we might need to meet again to clearly outline what you can do, will do and are to do while you work for Lacerta.”

Just before you could say that you understood him, a figure right outside the room caught your attention. Without warning, Hoseok yelled loud enough to be heard outside, “I sealed the deal, okay! Stop hounding me, Namjoon! That was just once! Never again!”

You jumped at the sheer volume of his voice, clapping your hands to your ears to muffle the sound. When he was done, you shot him an aggravated look before dryly commenting, “A heads up would have been nice.”

He huffed and muttered, “Sorry but that asshole needed to learn how to stop watching and hovering over everyone like a hawk. That’s Namjoon, the gang leader.”

“Oh” you supplied, more shocked by his usage of the word ‘gang’ than the actual information itself. He simply smiled, as if he found something funny before shaking his head in amusement.

“Alright, I won’t keep you for longer than necessary. See you next time, Hatter. And you’ll have to tell me how you hacked into our system by then” he said. You smirked wryly at the reminder as you moved to the door.

As you opened it, you paused and turned towards him. “Y/N in private, Hatter in public. I’d like to keep my anonymity. Also, I want a Jacuzzi in my bathroom."

“How do you know your room has a bathroom?”

“The twitch of your nose tells me my guess was right. See you, Hoseok.”

He spluttered. “Are you seriously asking me to basically do a renovation—”

“I am technically saving your ass” you said in a singsong voice. “Told you I’m not done skinning you alive for benefits.”

And then you shut the door behind you, leaving a Hoseok who was halfway between amused and exasperated at how things were turning out.

Your bowl of blue gummy candies was depressingly empty and you sulked like a kid as you stared at it. Settling into Lacerta’s main house was a little harder than you thought. what with everyone freely carrying their weapons around the house. It was safe to say you were terrified to your wit’s end during the first three days. It was more than a week now since you first arrived and had finally felt a little more comfortable. Still, the realization that you just willingly got yourself into this mess boggled you to this day. Munching on your candies had been your way of de-stressing even when the job assigned to you was simply just monitoring and storing the devices and the system Lacerta was tracking. However, you didn’t realize that your favorite food was gone until your fingertips hit the bottom of the bowl.

This was how Hoseok found you inside the computer room, scowling and pressing the keys of the keyboard harder than what was necessary. He took a moment to glance around the room before settling on the bowl on the desk.

“Blue gummy candies, correct? The one that tastes like mixed berries?” he asked. It made you stop whatever you were doing instantly and abruptly turn to face him.

You looked at him in confusion, not noticing he interrupted your work as you asked, “How did you know?”

“I eat the same stuff, too. I keep my stash hidden because the others like to dip in and empty my bowl out” he casually remarked. He unlocked a cabinet underneath his desk with a key, brandishing a larger bowl, filled to the brim with the same gummy candies you adored and loved. You watched with large eyes, uncaring when Hoseok laughed. “Go on. We can share this.”

You settled into a harmonious silence then. You monitored and saved data. Hoseok sorted through them and read through the ones that seemed important. He wrote down some notes on a pad of sticky paper and would often stick them on the corkboard on his side of the room. After some time, someone slipped into the room.

“Hey Hoseok hyung, have you figured— Oh, candy!”

Before he could get a single piece, you have swiped the bowl away. The young man looked at you with a shocked expression as you hugged the food tightly to your chest. You frowned at him while Hoseok struggled to breathe from laughing hard.

“Jungkook, don’t bother. Hatter is having sugar withdrawals and she won’t be sharing any time soon” he told him. Jungkook merely pouted before moving away from you, peering at Hoseok’s notes instead.

“Hmm, look’s like we’re on to something” Jungkook commented. “I can see a pattern but I can’t connect point A to point B.”

“I thought I was the only one thinking that” Hoseok said, relief coloring his voice. While eating the candies, you watched the two of them as they conversed and made guesses on what could Cepheus’ next move possibly be. You took the time to study your (un)official work partner from head to toe. At first glance, it was easy to deduce that he was attractive. However, you also noticed how lithe he was and how graceful the lines of his body were. When he moved, his body was fluid and light. You also didn’t miss the muscles that shifted under his clothes, evidence that he didn’t spend his days simply sitting in front of computer screens.

“Y/N? Am I your latest science experiment? I’m not used to the probing look.” Hoseok’s voice snapped you out of your reverie. Your eyes darted around, only to see that Jungkook already left. Upon seeing his amused smirk, you flushed and turned away, mumbling a ‘sorry, lost in thought’. You pointedly looked at your own screen with determination and continued working with vigor. You heard him chuckle and hoped that he wouldn’t mention anything about your stare from earlier.

“How are you settling into Lacerta so far?” he asked casually. You briefly stole a glance, only to see he was still looking at you. The smile was still there and it made you flush even more in embarrassment.

“Good, I guess.”

“Really? I just noticed that you eat a lot of your gummy candies when you feel stressed” he pointed out his observation. It made you flinch lightly, realizing you weren’t being as discreet or careful as you thought you were. “If it helps, you can talk to me. Rant or something. Just give me a heads up if you’re about to cry.”

You laughed at his words before lightly saying, “Nah, don’t worry too much. That was just me working both my mouth and mind at the same time.”

He raised an eyebrow at that. “So you mean to say, you’re overthinking and stress-eating because of that?”

When you gave him a sheepish look, he chuckled before telling you, “Don’t worry too much. Happens to the best of us. I’m not about to hound you for more details if you don’t want me to pry.”

“Thanks” you said with sincere gratitude. He merely replied with a smile, matching yours before giving you a salute. And then the two of you returned to your work.

“You look good in blue, by the way” you offhandedly complimented him but you didn’t miss the grin he was shooting you from your peripheral view.

“I think I’d have to whip out my signature blue slacks then. I just discovered when and where Cepheus planned to meet some of their ‘investors’.” He shot out of his seat and was at the door in a blink of an eye, hollering down the hallway.

“Namjoon hyung! We struck gold! It’s time to get Seokjin’s pretty face out there.”

#bts #bts jhope #jung hoseok #jhope #hoseok #kpop #Tumblr fanfic #fluff #action #gang!au #hacker!hoseok #freelance hacker!you #gang!bts #criminal!au #bts jung hoseok #bts hoseok #bts lacerta series #i'm tea-deprived while writing this #i'm so sorry if this is bad

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jhope-seok · 6 years ago

Text

I have a lot of things to say about Tinder.

This is a personal rant about idiot boys on tinder. So if you’d like to read my CRAZY FUCKING ESCAPADES IN THE DATING WORLD. PLEASE. GO AHEAD. CLICK READ MORE. IT’LL BE INTERESTING. And fun. To watch me implode then explode.

Warnings: mentions of sex/sexting, lots of cursing, men being disgusting--potentially triggering, and one angry ass woman.

Warning part 2: this is A LOOOONG ASS POST, probably with a lot of grammatical errors. It’s 2am. (just so we’re all aware, it’s about 2.3k worth of ranting plus pictorial evidence)

So here’s the thing about me and tinder. I’ve been on the thing since I was in college, probably around junior year when I really came into the realization of my sexuality/being a pansexual person. Keep in mind this was like.....5 or 6 years ago now. I was interested in exploring my options, exhausted from going to countless frat parties and having random makeout sessions with boys who never asked for my number, and/or went on to makeout with the next girl they found at the party. Over the years I have collected an INFLUX of over 1,000 matches. I am not saying this number to brag, I am saying this number to give you an idea of how much of a credible fucking source I am when I present my case. And my case is as such.

ALL MEN ON TINDER ARE THE FUCKING. ABSOLUTE. WORST.

For perspective I have also dabbled in the following dating apps:

OKCupid (absolutely horrid. don’t do it. the shit i went through on this app....just. don’t get me started. I could make a whole other post about the atrocities of this site)

HER (really sad option for lesbian/bi/pan/women looking for other women)

Bumble (pretty successful but forcing the woman to speak first is annoying as hell and then giving a STRAIGHT MALE ONLY 24 HOURS TO RESPOND. Utter hell.)

Hinge (just...downright annoying)

CrossPaths (for christians. Honestly a good idea. Poorly executed. Poorly advertised).

Badoo (honestly...what the fuck)

Coffee Meets Bagel (good idea; too complicated)

Skout (nope)

The Game by Hot or Not (i don’t remember using this but my phone says it’s in my cloud)

And probably some others I can’t remember

What you should take away from this list is that

I’m a needy bitch

I was VERY DESPERATE at times

And i’ve tried a LOT OF OPTIONS.

therefore: don’t comment on this saying: well this worked, well that worked, try this, try that. No. Tinder is still one of the only options that actually works consistently and will continue to work because it is one of the least complicated among the dating apps.

Now. To my point that all men on tinder are the absolute fucking worst.

Time for some examples.

I will not be using these people’s real names, because that’s just mean. So I will present them to you in cases.

Case #1:

Me and this man matched about a year and a half ago, end of 2016. We were unable to meet up because I had a bunch of plans going on--at the time I worked in a law firm and my commute was hell so i only had time to go on dates on the weekends. And being that it was december I was busy every...single...weekend. Which he was fine with! (Awww what a kind gentlemen). No.

He had made it pretty clear from the beginning that he was really only in it for the sex. which for me at the time was fine. I let him know that I didn’t just fuck around on the first date. I lived--and still do live--with my mother and so he couldn’t just come over whenever and i couldn’t just leave whenever i wanted to spend the night at his place in D.C. He said that was fine. However, apparently he was not fine with that.

We talked for a month, lots of sexting, lots of naked snaps, whatever, whatever, we were basically waiting to jump each others bones. But I had also told him that I did not fuck on the first date. I had a rule. I would not break that rule. Again, he said he was fine with that.

On our first date--in a CROWDED RESTAURANT--for brunch, he kept whispering to me about how he wanted to push all of our plates off the table and fuck me in front of all those people. I politely told him to shut up because there were people sitting less than two feet away from us and that was inappropriate for sunday brunch to be talking like that (how proper of me....). Anyways, I let him walk me to my car in a garage, and as we approached it he came up behind me and forcefully turned me around to kiss him. I was like “ooh how hot. I like this.” Anyways, I drove him to his car, we made out a little, then we went on our separate ways. We had a second date not much longer after that, where we had agreed to go out to dinner BUT that first we were gonna fuck in his car. So we met up in a garage and we waited for the cars around us to leave and then we made out, and i sucked his dick. I did N O T let him have sex with me because I was annoyed that he was trying to push me to it--he had a daddy kink--and kept saying “ooh how hard do you want daddy to fuck you”. I said “You can only fuck me when I say you can, and I say no.” thank god he respected my boundaries. So I sucked him dry, then he “MAGICALLY” got a call from his work calling him in. I barely heard from him after that. Because he told me I should come over and spend the night so we could fuck. I said no. He ghosted me.

Case #2--Who knows:

Soooo many fucking men. Have ghosted me. For no reason. Like we’ll have a good few opening lines. And then....nothing. Forever. Where in the FUCK DID YOU GO?! Did you find someone better? Did you grow uninterested with our conversation?! Did you forget how to speak the English language? Did you decide you regretted swiping on me? The worst is when they don’t unmatch you and then it’s just left there....hanging.

Case #whatever:

The fucking men who ask if it’s okay to text. And then don’t text.

I don’t even remember this dude’s NAME in the first place to omit it, but we got into an argument because he supports the store brand cheese puff that is America’s president, and I matched him only so I could yell at him (yeah I know...whatever...I like to prove my dominance and tell boys why they’re wrong. Also because half of the time I use dating apps just to have conversations with people because I’m bored). Anyways. we got in this heated debate and he was like “I like your fire, you should text me here’s my number ____” blah. So I texted him cause i was interested enough in our debate to continue it. THE BITCH NEVER ANSWERED ME. LITERALLY....FOR MONTHS. PROBABLY OVER A YEAR. And then out of fucking nOWHERE he responds like “hey who is this again?” Dude...... NO.

Case #The Never Ending Message Senders:

These men are the worst. So I should explain myself first. I don’t really ever unmatch someone unless it’s for a good reason. Like they’re being disgusting, racist, homophobic, gross, call me fat, ugly, whatever. For the most part I don’t unmatch with someone because in the old days of tinder, unmatching would just PUT THE PERSON BACK IN YOUR CIRCUIT (good job tinder). I’m assuming they did this in case you deleted your tinder, or your app crashed and you had to restart, or you accidentally unmatched someone, whatever. So I don’t unmatch for the sole reason that I don’t want these jerks, who never took the time to respond to my hello or witty opening statement, back in my playing field. I don’t revisit my old matches, I don’t try to restart conversations with them.

If only men could learn the same fucking thing. I have so many men who CONSTANTLY message me. I’m talking like once in every blue moon. It’s like they let the conversation lie for a while, and then BAM another message. The ones I do actually unmatch are the ones that don’t wait a while. They just constantly message, hour after hour after hour until I either respond or unmatch. I don’t know a woman who WOULD respond after having gotten 10 messages of the same “Hello? You there?” “Member me?” (yes one dude has actually said “member me” to me. Not “remember me”...”member me”) etc. etc. in the course of a few hours. Take the hint dude. Please. I don’t enjoy being ghosted, but I know when to take a hint.

A perfect example of such case is the following!

(Context: I just updated the pictures in my tinder account today! So through tinder’s cool new facebook timeline! you can see when your matches update their profiles. to scroll through and judge them even further to see if they’ve gotten cuter or uglier through time).

Please take note of the dates attached to the message. For clarification, “today” is August 27th, 2018!

I have since unmatched him. Buddy. Please. Take the hint. (Also, how fucking creepy of him to say that I’ve gotten closer since a while back....like are you tracking my distance every time you message me? Please dear lord, no).

Case #THE IDIOTS WHO WAIT YEARS TO RESPOND.

This. THIS. THIIIIIS RIGHT HERE. IS WHAT HAS GOT MY BLOOD BOILED SO MUCH I NEEDED TO MAKE THIS POST. THE FUCKING IDIOTS WHO MATCH WITH ME. AND THEN CLAIM THAT THEY DELETED THEIR TINDER. OR THAT THEY LOST THEIR PHONE. JUST REDOWNLOADED. DIDN’T SEE MY MESSAGE. FOR FUCKING. YEARS.

OOOOOOOH BOY. You’ve gotta have some damn nerve to pull that shit. If you lost the app, deleted it, got a new phone, WHATEVER. Your profile would not continue to show up on the matching feed. People would not be able to swipe on your face to find that they matched with you. You would not exist in the eyes of tinder. You would be GONE from the system.

So don’t pull that shit with me. So many dudes have had the audacity to pull this shit with me, and when I call them out on it, most of the time I get either one of three responses: they say “oof yeah I’m sorry, I’m a dick can we move on?”, “Hahaha sorry” and then they continue to ghost me, or people who pull the shit I listed above.

These next photos are from THE SAME DAY AS THE PREVIOUS PHOTOS. Please take note of the date of the first message. (“today” in this sense is technically August 28, 2018 because it’s past midnight.)

Although I deleted his name, I gotta say. My insult was pretty on point. Anyways.

Like how the fuck can you live with yourself with that fucking lie?! Own up to that shit. Be like “yep oops sorry, didn’t think you were cute the first time but this snapchat filter making u look damn good” like don’t be a DOUCHE DUDE. Men are just honestly so fucking frustrating. And yes you better fucking believe I sent that reason for unmatching to tinder. You best fucking BELIEVEEEEEEE I did that. I’m so fucking mad at men. Like how in the hell.

I’ve HONESTLY had better luck matching with MARRIED COUPLES on tinder than I have had with straight men. Married couples at least know how to respect people. God damn.

YOUR MOTHERS DID NOT RAISE YOU TO BE LIKE THIS, MEN. LEARN HOW TO BE DECENT HUMAN BEINGS. JESUS CHRIST.

All in all, if you’ve ever toyed with the idea of downloading tinder: Don’t. Stay out of the fucking awful shit that is Tinder and dating apps for as long as you can. I have my settings set up to men in their 30s, and honestly older men do not mean more mature men. Just absolutely frustrating.

Also, as an addendum:

Case #Don’t put my height in my bio/or do and say “Cause I guess it’s important/matters”

To all males on the planet earth: PUT. YOUR. FUCKING. HEIGHT. IN. YOUR. BIO. It fucking matters. As a tall as woman, it is so fucking annoying to match with a cute dude and then have them say “Hey I’m 5′2″ is that okay?” um....no. I’m sorry buddy. That is not okay. I have strict height limits for this ride and 5′2″ does not pass the riding restrictions.

We’re gonna call in a CELEBRITY SHOT for this story, I matched with this dude on bumble who didn’t have his height in his profile. (Context: my bumble profile says “5′10�� cause it doesn’t matter” <--a nice jab at all the straight dudes out there) and we go about having this great conversation, we’re clicking, he knows one of my friends from college, we bond, we go on a date. THE FIRST THING OUT OF THIS ASSHOLE’S MOUTH ON OUR DATE WAS “WOW. You’re taller than I expected.” BITCH HELLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO CAN U READ. IT’S THE FIRST THING IN MY BIO.

Sub case: I once had a guy match with me, tell me he was shorter than me, then asked me if I would be okay owning him as my slave. I understand and respect everyone’s fetishes, considering I have a slight dominance fetish as well, but a hello would have been nice first.

Thanks for coming to my ted talk.

#rachel rambles #tinder #tinder stories #just absolutely god awful annoying humans

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