#I’m not complaining 😹

[cormancatacombs]

oh?

oh??

OH?!

[jtrbluv]

guys who’s going to oakland day 1 bc i’m gonna die on floor AND I DIDNT EVEN PLAN ON GETTING FLOOR🚼🚼🚼

[melancholicstation]

HUSBAND JACK SCHLOSSBERG HEADCANONS 𓍼 𓇢𓆸

taglist: @remotewatch @bloxholden35 @kennediva @h-l-vlovesvintage @absurdlyvintage @chemicalw0rld @fortheloveofjos @kimcrystal123 @astro-vibes-bro @tsloverr-13

might make this into a couple of one-shots??

imagining WIFE!READER as an orion carloto type, who balances modelling and writing, and makes tiktoks in the same vain of alanabananaxox on tiktok (she's been my no.1 tiktoker since 2021) and sotce.

met wife!reader at a runway after party of an up and coming new york indie brand ( sandy liang, khaite, bode etc. )

proposes to you with the blythe doll you had been obsessing over, dressed in a wedding dress and hand-customised by a popular etsy dealer with quite a high rate like this girl on tt

encouraged by jack to do a ‘what’s in my ( miu miu joie leather ) bag’ video on tiktok to help campaign for kamala akin to this video of anne hathaway but with a different vibe.

jack is ultimate embarrassing hard launcher bofy, leaving in all his girlfriends giggles that come from his chaotic antics when filming his videos.

wife!reader loves to slather jack’s face in biologique recherche’s “masque vivant”, he complains that it smells like rotting meat😹😹😹😹😹.

jack would be always on that damn phone during your runway shows, recording each time you pass him by in the catwalk.

would be the absolute opposite of marriage-shy.

unpopular opinion this man would be asking about marriage, a solid 3 months in ( jfk and jackie married in a YEAR )

fucks UP a rotisserie chicken.

forwards you his tweets before and asks if they’re good enough to post.

smells like aesop musk and of herbal deodorant.

wife!reader buys rick owen’s black and white t-shirts and slacks for jack, and jack’s absolutely baffled when he learns the price tag.

love language is buying wife!reader drinks whenever and wherever they are: hot chocolate in central park, home-delivers you a sab benedetto sparkling water because he had a meeting at cipriani downtown, and always orders a polo bar punch for you prior to your arrival to your shared weekly dinner date at the polo bar on 55th st.

instigates a24 marathons on friday nights, much to the dismay of your prior night plans ( you are more of a criterion collection girl and have held a subscription since you were a freshman in college )

( clumsily ) slips lana del rey lyrics into sexting and dirty talk.

husband!jack and wife!reader texts go like this:

jack is horrific at low impact pilates, he needs to be near a body of water.

he wears your prized doublesoul x orion caroloto ‘lamb’ socks around your woodfloored high-rise despite your varied attempts at hiding them from him.

constantly frets over you during society galas, which is quite convenient due to your tempered social anxiety and your forgetful memory of high society etiquette.

immediately brings you to meet the family, for which you were completely unprepared for ( i’m imagining something reminder of that one story of meghan markle meeting princess kate middleton in ripped jeans and bare feet )

jack loves to wear your 100% cotton brandy melville pointelle tanks despite them being comically tiny for his frame.

would have an innocence kink.

he gets intensely flushed when called his proper full name: john bouvier kennedy schlossberg, wife!reader abuses this to the HIGHEST degree!!!

the first time he entered you apartment he was constantly paranoid of breaking anything because your house was littered with ceramics from brooklyn under-ground designers and clay lamb figurines.

he NEEDS his beauty Zzzzzzz or else.

plays with your very expensive westman atelier blushes like a toddler.

sickly devoted to you.

you both want to adopt a lamb despite living in a HIGH-RISE apartment.

sends pics captioned with anaïs nin lewd quotes.

he would think whole foods was stupidly over priced but would purchase his groceries there in spite of his opinions.

has hyperfixations on old-hollywood women which causes you to be snippy at him for exactly 2-3 hours ex. jack’s current hyper fixation on audrey hepburn being his doppelgänger.

wife!reader definitely participated in that egg cracking trend where girls would crack an egg on their boyfriends head.

would love caring for your hair and doing your curly girl hair routine if you had one.

wife!reader does small yet viral shoots for brands like mirror palais, the row, and loewe.

manhandles you ( lovingly ) without even trying.

mans is a chronic diptyque candle lighter.

loves to be coddled and cradled as a grown man…

plays with your van cleef stack before stage when he’s nervous about his speech landing correctly

uses his family connections to get his girl courted by the high-ticket fashion brands: schiaparelli, chanel, dior, yves saint laurent etc.

[arcadia345]

Astro notes💋🥀

Just my observations :)🔞

♡ Scorpio mercury or degree is the definition of elephant in the room, it’s like they try their best to make you uncomfortable with their words , on the brighter side I love how deep their minds are

♡Saturn in the 6th/2nd could go a long time without eating and not even notice

♡ One of my friends had a baby today(Aries moon) and she’s already threatening people not to play with her child💀 cute tho

♡ I feel like the only Libra placement that doesn’t try to be likable is Libra moons, their personality is so lovely for the most part☺️ I’ve only met men with this placement and WHEW they are sooooooo charming🥴

♡ I’ve noticed guys with Venus conjunct their sun can come off a little ✨ even if they’re not they’re just in touch with their feminine side. Also guys with Venus conjunct moon could have this energy as well just more subtle

♡ Aquarius in 7th will always give black sheep energy, no matter how “popular” they are it’s always something that differentiates them from everyone else, could be known for doing questionable things

♡ Taurus season I see lots of people getting lip piercings but lots of new tats and piercings in general

♡ 11th house has to do with hopes and dreams, mars is your passion and drive, having mars in 11th synastry with someone with someone could mean having fantasy’s about them,being fwb, or being friends with someone but wanting to be more. Me and my friend both have this synastry and the tension is HIGH especially with her Jupiter conjunction to my mars🥴

♡It’s not surprise Saturn babies look soo good in slicked back hairstyles since it rules hair and restrictions

♡Also they weren’t joking when they said prominent Saturn placements could make you a pothead😳 I thought I was a smoker but whew they SMOKE 💨

♡ Aries moon moms are so PUSHY. They’re always trying to dictate your emotions like your not your own human then get insecure when you cut contact with them. And she never takes your emotions seriously till you act out of character, It’s like she never wants you to rest so draining. Also they can be intimidating/scary in a way especially from the stories the Aries moon child shares about them😅 did they lie tho?

♡ Scorpio moons could also resonate but I feel like with Aries moms(sidereal Pisces moon)there’s a innocence to it like they truly don’t recognize their toxic traits until you confront them about it but with Scorpio moon’s mom (sidereal Libra moon) they KNOW exactly what they’re doing when they manipulate. And other people could easily alter ur mother’s perception of you, very wishywashy. They type to be jealous of their kids especially if they have a daughter

♡ Chiron in 12th could get accused of things they didn’t do allll the time , it gets to a point where they don’t even try to defend themselves anymore cause it’s like no one listens why waste your energy 😭 a good example is Micheal Jackson

♡ Gemini moon children have moms that don’t hold back🥴 very blunt especially with some Aries energy added

♡ I giggle every time I remember Park Jimin has a Gemini moon I just know he has the best comebacks and inside jokes😂 (Jimin if you’re seeing this let’s be friends plz😆)

♡ I’ve noticed with Virgo moons children may see one parent more fit to be a parent than the other at some point in their life. Doesn’t mean the other is a shitty parent or anything but if they had to decide to live with one of them they’ll already know who😹

♡ Also Virgo placements why do y’all constantly complain about something you could easily solve? I see this more in undeveloped Virgo placements

♡ Leo moon children could have mothers that are selfish in one way or another, wheither it be their time, money, or love

♡Jupiter in 3rd (natal and transit) what is home? I’ve been to so many places in my city that I didn’t know existed, I also got a 🍕 delivery job so I’m on the go all the time, but since my natal Jupiter is in my 8th it’s kinda a darker transit for me- I literally hit and ran two people in counting 😭 (I’m not even a bad driver they happened on the same week!🙄) communication especially over the phone has been vile omg the amount of times I’ve been cussed out by strangers otp is crazy. Also I’ve lost old friends /gained new one

That’s all for now💋

[n3ptoonz]

Hi I’m a bit embarrassed to say this lol, that’s why I’m anonymous. Can you please write headcanons for Bi Han, Liu Lang, Geras, Tomas and Raiden with someone who uh, really really likes to suck their cockk 🫣

😳

i sure as hell can anon🫦

Sub-Zero

knowing bi han stubborn ass he's gonna claim it gets in the way whenever you ask more often than not, but as soon as he picks up on your fixation...you can literally do no wrong

most times he takes control, other times the dome is so overwhelmingly good he grunts constantly and gets lightheaded, but don't tell nobody 🤫

you'd be surprised with the amount of praise he gives you. it would even go to point of him noticing differences and similarities between present and past with how skilled you were. leave it up to him to make everything into fighting terms (he doesn't know how to express his emotions give him a moment😹)

Liu Kang

at a loss for words tbh. he knew you loved getting intimate with him but specifically giving him oral caught him off guard. this is only bc he's used to being dominant and making sure your pleasure comes first that he's like woah, you're quite eager there ���

he wouldn't be one to deny you though. in a way he's still prioritizing your pleasure since you are indeed receiving it from giving him head, and was not one to ever complain!

he's not one to have or show his ego, but damn, the lewd sounds that come from your mouth and the sight of you clearly enjoying yourself does make him feel like the luckiest god there is. to have you all to himself in this portion of his lifetime is the absolute highlight and he'll never forget it

Geras

ik geras isn't some giant monster man but he absolutely has a giant monster co-

you can barely even reach past the middle, and you want to keep doing that? okay, he thinks, by all means do what makes you both happy in the end

secretly worried for your jaws and sometimes your throat. he's gonna keep asking if you're okay and would prob be very confused/concerned if tears started falling from trying to take all of him. you gotta explain it's all part of the process and you enjoy it. he might not ever understand everything about mortals, but he sure loves the pleasure while he learns

Smoke

i 1000% believe that tomas is super sensitive around his dick. like, regular sex is already one thing. but...superb head from you? he MIGHT just die

theoretically speaking you wouldn't be able to pin him down while you suck him off but a girl can dream, let's throw logic out the window real quick. he'd lose his fucking mind and start muttering praises in czech

he does prefer to pleasure you BUT who would he be to say no to you?? he gets bomb head on a regular basis and a hot partner to do it. he wouldn't even have time to ask you for it because you keep telling him you will/you want to. if you really bout it, you'll discover he'd definitely be into getting oral in a secluded public space like the bathroom or training room

Raiden

like i always say, he may come off as a shy cutie (which he is) BUT when that dark side comes out it's over

i feel like he's a switch. so, whenever you ask if you can do a lil vacuum action it always starts the same way, but never ends the same way

it starts with him shyly agreeing letting you do your thing then bam, he either starts pushing your head down more and makes you go at the pace he wants OR you're just too good and make him squirm, buck, whine, and tremble. it's always a gamble but hey, i like these odds, don't you? you two equally go back and forth with pleasuring each other and he even worries he'd get selfish but like who cares mf im tryna hear you 😮‍💨

[yaut-jaknowit]

Okay, any of ur yautja OC reacting to low spice tolerance GN reader eating spicy food, and they’re just a mess after the first bite, tongue on fire, lips numb and their chugging anything that’s liquid, but still continuing eating the spicy food, it just sounds funny asf. 😹

Low Tolerance

Pairing: Uihoy (male Yautja) x Vic'tao (male Yautja) x GN!Reader

Word Count: 1823

Summary: Between the three of you, only Vic'tao loves and even craves hot foods. When he has to chance to take the two of you to an upscale restaurant, he snatches it up. He's only able to get take out but he doesn't complain. You didn't realize how much heat Vic'tao could handle.

Author Note: I don't know if you know me in real life because this is me. Mild is too hot for me. I cannot handle spicy food once-oh-ever. I'll start to flop over and die.

Masterlist

Ao3

Both of your feet were thrown over the armrest of the copilot chair. A tablet sat in your hands, occupying your mind until Vic’tao returned to the ship. Uihoy was in the captain’s chair and going through all of the checks of the ship. You peeked over your device to stare at the handsome, bulky form of Uihoy. He was leaned forward, typing away at the console in front of him.

In the light of the ship, his purple scales reflected the light. You couldn’t help the soft smile to spread across your features, head tilting slightly to the side. How did you get so lucky with not one but two amazing mates? They had stumbled into your life unexpectedly. Here you were now, the third addition to their small group. The best mates you could ever ask for.

“Why is little ooman giving Uihoy that look?” the purple Yautja spoke up without taking his bright eyes off of the console. Whoops, caught red handed.

Heat bloomed to life under your cheeks but you didn’t look away from him. “Can’t your mate not admire the catch I’ve caught?” you drawled with a cheeky smirk. Uihoy huffed with his upper two mandibles quirking up. Ah, you got him.

A hum tumbled out of his throat. “Yes, little mate can. But if looking continues, might as well come over here. Uihoy feels a bit… lonely.” You rolled your eyes and closed the case on your tablet.

“Vic’s been gone for less than five minutes. You’re already lonely?” you teased him, a sparkle in your eye. It was a hard draw between the two of them on who’s the most needy. Each have their differences. Both need their own requirements met every day. That’s not a complaint. You loved them. You would do a lot for them.

Uihoy took his eyes off of the screen in front of him to turn his direction at you. A small pout molding his features. You sighed dramatically before slipping off the chair. The tablet was left on the seat. You meandered over to the hunk and stopped in front of him. A short purr left his throat. He leaned back and invited you to his lap.

Just like before, you sat in the same position. The best position to relax in. Uihoy carded his thick fingers through your hair and let his hand sit against your scalp. You leaned against it and let your eyes drift shut. Comfortable.

“Vicky better hurry his yellow ass up because I’m starting to starve!” you groaned and reopened your eyes in a dramatic flip of your head. “What’s even this place called again?” All you remember as Vic raved on about the restaurant was the fact it was best place for food. He said he was lucky to be able to get take out from them. Though, it would’ve been better to sit down. Not that he knew but it was an educated guess.

His claws carefully ran down your scalp. You instantly were mesh in his hold. “The best translation to English is ‘Mama’s Fish Bowl’,” Uihoy answered your question. You couldn’t help the snort and peered up at him with a raised brow. “Don’t judge the name before trying the food. Little ooman may regret it.”

Not that you were making fun of the name, but it’s such a… cliché. You believed the translation was off. Some languages just didn’t work with English over even any other language on earth.

Both Vic and Uihoy were well adverse in a lot of languages. But, even they will fall back onto their translator for a smooth transition. Maybe, this was one of those times the language just doesn’t work.

“What kind of food do they serve?” At first, you didn’t think anything wrong with that but realized different pallets and culture. Of course, the food was safe for you. This isn’t going to be like asking if it was like Italian or Mexican. This was an alien cuisine. That didn’t stop you from being curious. What type of food was it like?

He continued to softly scratch at your scalp, making you putty in his hands. “That’s for little hunter to find out when Vic’tao comes back.” You sighed and rolled your eyes again. Damn him. Your eyes drifted shut as you turn your head towards Uihoy and looked up at him. “But trust when said this is damn good food.” Another smile broke across your features.

You lifted a hand to cup his jaw. “I do. A lot. I trust both of you with my life.” He tilted his head to nuzzle against your palm. A short chuff came from the giant.

“What are the two love doves doing without me?” A familiar voice filtered into the space. You twisted around in Uihoy’s lap to see Vic’tao strolling into the cockpit. Both of hands full with bags. Your eyes widened at the sight. The two of them ate a lot but that much food should feed the two of you for a few days. Perfect, leftovers!

A groan escaped you. “Finally, you’re back! We’ve been waiting years,” you taunted him with a grin showing off your teeth. The yellow Yautja scowled at you and strolled further into the room.

Both of the bags were set down on the chair you once sat in. Then, the male spun on his heel and was strutting away. “Uie, you want Cn’tlip?” Your face scrunched up at the name of their beer. It was disgusting. Uihoy chirped his answer. Vic was gone again, heading to the kitchen for said drinks. You only had what was safe for a human. Water and some sort of carbonated drink that tasted like Pepsi. Once in a while, they’ll be able to pick up what tasted like Sierra Mist. That stuff was a special occasion though since it cost so much and was rare.

As soon as Vic was gone, he was already back. The beer like drink soared through the air. Uihoy snapped his hand out and snatched it cleanly through the air. Your soda was also thrown across the room. You barely had enough time to reach out and clumsily catch it. “Vic’tao! Careful,” you scolded and glared at the laughing Yautja.

The male made his way back over to the chair. Take out boxes were set out. Some of it left inside of the bags. This felt like a classic moment back at home. You would be alone in your apartment, having take out after a grueling day at work.

Two boxes were set down in your lap. You quirked a brow before Uihoy set the beer in a cupholder and grabbed the top one. “That for little hunter.” A purple finger pointed at the white box left in your lap. You opened the box, eyes scanning over the contents.

Steam first met your nostrils before your eyes began to water. You held back a cough. “Ehm… is this spicy?” you questioned and looked over Vic to turn your head away from the flavors trying to kill you.

Said Yautja peered over his shoulder. “Yes, mild though.” He opened a box and took a lung full of the scent. Then, he paused. “Wait… C’jit. You’re ooman.” You raised a brow and snorted. After all this time, it still slips his mind. Never in a dangerous, harm situation though. Never.

“It’ll be fine. I think. I’ll just give it a try. How about that?” you attempted to resolve the situation. Surely it couldn’t be that bad. Yet, here you are, with a low tolerance. You instantly knew you were going to regret this entirely. But, the two of them went out of their way to get food, specially food for you that’s human safe.

Vic’tao gave you a skeptical look. Uihoy’s hand tightened in your hair. “You don’t have to eat it if you know it’ll hurt you.” You gave the Yautja a look.

“I’ve got this. Promise.” He looked a little longer at you before relenting and returning to his own buffet in front of him. You looked down at your food and took a deep breath in. Yes, you were going to feel pain. A lot of pain in less than five minutes.

You picked up the utensil and dug into the noodle like dish. The noodles were main red and orange colors, much different then what you’re used to back home. Despite the heat, the smell of it was delicious. No wonder this place was a hit if you couldn’t tell by the scent. Then, you carefully scooped the noodles off of the fork.

At first, flavors bursted on your tongue. You groaned and leaned against Uihoy. God, this was the best food you’ve had in a long time.

Then, your lips began to go numb. The rest of your mouth bursted into flame. Your jaw dropped as you tried to cool it down by breathing heavily.

“You good?” Vic’tao laughed while watching this unfold in front of him. “I told you, you don-“ you interrupted him by raising a hand.

“All finah. Ah eak. Goo… good,” you choked out and started to chug down the closest drink to your hand. But… that only made it worse. You winced before downing some more noodles. There were some hardy choices you are regretting at the moment. Despite the heat though, the flavors were amazing.

Drool started to drip from the corner of your numb lips. You slurped it back up and tried to finish off your drink only to find out it was gone. You find the second closest drink and started to down it as well. The taste fought off the heat for only a moment.

It only got worse. You quickly packed up the box, threw in back into Uihoy’s lap as you sprinted to the kitchen. “Muy mouf is on firer!” you screamed and about smacked into the cockpit door when it didn’t open. You slipped past and gone you were.

By the time you returned, the fire was mostly subdued. You slowly walked back into the cockpit, a slice of bread in your hand. Both of your mates were holding back their laughter and watched you. You held up the piece. “I found bread,” you mumbled through still numb lips.

Uihoy nodded and hummed. “How’s the mouth?” Your eyes narrowed on his purple scales. You bit off another chunk of the bread. It helped fight off the heat.

“Fine.” You climbed back into Uihoy’s lap without another word and slow chomped down on the noodles again. Your bread helping along the way.

[kairoot]

the hide my bfs here prank one with jay is so real 😭😭 i cant wait to see the break up one 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫 hopefully u don’t plan on making it too angsty or anything :00

enhypen, break-up prank ꒰♡︎꒱ . ⁺

genre: fluff, a little emotional but not too angsty!

warnings: mentions of ending a relationship, nothing too much, jay’s is a text message oneshot

requested: yes!

pairing: enha x gn!reader

author’s note: of course, i didn’t plan for this to be too angsty, mainly all jokes! 😽💕

🔖 — heeseung.

instantly turns into a confused Bambi

doesn’t take you seriously at first

but then he’s kinda worried

a rollercoaster of emotions tbh

esp after you tell him it’s a prank

heeseung had noticed that you were acting weird all day. whenever he went to kiss you you didn’t kiss back, or when he talked to you your responses were short. he wasn’t sure what it was.

as he entered the room, he saw you sitting at the edge, scrolling through movies on the tv.

he sat on his knees in front of you, wrapping his arms around your waist.

“love?” he called, your gaze not on him but you could feel his on you. you gave a half-hearted hum, eyes still on the tv.

“is there something wrong?”

“hee,” you started, putting the remote down. “i think we should break up.”

his heart sunk for a moment. that was so random, you weren’t serious right?

“babe,” he laughed a bit, taking your hand in his. “seriously, what’s wrong?”

you finally look down at him, a sour look on your face. his expression changed, doe eyes now sparkling up at you.

“did I.. did I do something?”

the prank didn’t last very long since you weren’t able to resist the look in his eyes.

“oh, baby,” you wrapped your arms around him, cooing. ok, now he was really confused..

“i was joking honey, i can’t leave you.”

that made his insides all fuzzy. but he was still indeed, confused.

🔖 — jay.

confused pt2

esp when you call him by his first name

is lowkey upset

he’s in denial

cause how are you gonna try to break up with THE park jongseong??

over text too??!

will not let you “break up” with him

🔖 — jake.

might actually break down in tears

he’s a bit emotional guys

is literally going through a list of things he did in his day to check if he did anything wrong

shut him up with kisses please before he starts panicking

definitely don’t try this prank on him again

“hey, babe-“ jake sat next to you on the couch, going in for a kiss. he stopped his sentence though, when you dodged the smooch he was about to give you.

“jake, omg this is why i wanna break up with you.” you playfully rolled your eyes. his turned into puppy ones, now leaning away from you slowly.

“w-what? did i do something? am i being too touchy? clingy? did i forget to put the seat down? did-“

he began to rant before you grabbed his face in both of your hands and brought your lips to his soft plump ones.

he made a confused noise but still melted into the kiss.

“I’m confused.” his words were muffled by your lips still on his, his hands coming to rest where yours remained on the sides of his face.

“i can never prank you.”

🔖 — sunghoon.

smug.

knows you’re not serious

cause once again, how are you gonna leave HIM?

does not take you seriously

“hoon, we should end this.” you said to him, leaning on the countertop in your kitchen. he stood at the stove, attempting to make dinner for the both of you.

“what, me trying not to burn dinner?” he chuckled a bit, that deep laugh making your cheeks warm. you tried not to get distracted by his charm and continue with the prank.

“no, our relationship.”

he snorted, not sparing you a glance, “y/n, please.”

“what?”

“you love me way too much to leave me. i’m just too handsome and lovable.” he shrugged, continuing to stir around dinner in his pan.

“you’re no fun, sunghoon.”

🔖 — sunoo.

ok?

then leave?

will not complain 😹

only cause he knows you’re not serious

if you were, he’d obviously talk to you abt it

but because he’s not fooled by your little jokes anymore he’s like fine 🤷🏽‍♀️

“sunoo, we should break up.”

“okay.” he responded from the sofa, scrolling through his phone. he didn’t even look up at you, just shrugging his shoulders when he answered.

“okay?” your mouth was agape as you laughed a bit.

“mhm. bye-bye.” he waved somewhere in your direction, still not looking up from his phone.

“SUNOO, YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO FIGHT FOR ME.”

“nah, im good.”

🔖 — jungwon.

is like wtf

wdym break up

what did he do?

lowkey has a hard time processing what you just said

you walk side by side with jungwon up to the library the two of you would be studying at. you stopped outside of the door, a faux pout on your face.

“what’s wrong, love?” jungwon stopped to look at your face as your gaze seemed to be on the ground.

you turned to him, “wonie, we need to break up.”

“what?” his eyebrows furrowed below his beanie. he shifted on one foot, eyes still on you as he tried to process the words that escaped your lips. the words he never, ever wanted to hear.

“we have to break up.”

“y/n, did you seriously bring me all the way here just to tell me that?” now he sounded irritated, his jaw clenching.

you finally looked up to see his expression, actually feeling bad now.

“no, baby, im just joking.” you hid your giggle with a small smile, wrapping your arms around his torso.

he sighed, shaking his head while mirroring your smile. he placed a hand on your head while the other came to wrap around you.

“come on, we’ve got some studying to do.”

🔖 — ni-ki.

wants to take you serious when he sees your face but he just can’t

ki is the prank master, he can see right through your little jokes

is like, “you? wanna leave me? yea ok 😹”

clowns you 100%

ni-ki plops on your bed, ready to share different details about your day when he notices your expression.

“what?” he lifts his head, propping himself on his elbows.

you sigh, not looking up, “i wanna break up.”

there was a loud silence before it was interrupted by ni-ki’s loud laugh. he cackled for a good while, grasping his stomach as you looked at him like he was crazy.

“are you really laughing right now?”

“i-im sorry, it’s just-“ he snorted, laughing even harder this time. you sat there, arms folded. you could never fool someone who could pull pranks better than you.

⟢ milan’s notes: another short reaction im sorry 😞

taglist: @haechansbbg @contyynishimura (message or comment to be added)

[itsmarsss]

motivation [Miguel Diaz x GN! Reader] (Cobra Kai)

(~from the vault~)

Request: "ok... you wanted a miguel oneshot? here you go... y\n is johnnys daughter, and she & Miguel get caught making out in her room 😹 PLS WRJTE THIS I LOVE IT"

Warnings: making out, teenage cringe (this made more sense when i was writing this at 16 lmao)

Word count: 1,440

[. . .]

“This is so boooring,” you exaggeratedly complained, your head falling back onto your bed frame in frustration.

"It's 20% of the grade,” Miguel reminded you.

"I knowww.”

"Come on, you can do it,” he affirmed, smiling as he rolled his eyes at your obvious drama. He went right back to quizzing you. “What does codominance mean?”

“Both… alleles are dominant?”

"Both alleles are recessive.”

“Then why’s it called codominance?” You ask, annoyed. 

“Hey I’m not the inventor of genetics,” he laughed, putting his hands up in surrender.

“We’ve been at this for hours, my brain is totally fried at this point.”

“No it’s not. You know all this!”

"Well obviously I don’t."

Miguel nodded in disagreement. "You just need to find some motivation."

"Like what?"

"Like…" He looked up, trying to think of something, and you admittedly hoped maybe he’d suggest a break because holy shit you were not having fun right now, but his eyes lit up with an idea, his smile quickly turning into a mischievous grin, making you fairly confident whatever he’d just come up with was something way more complicated than a break.

"No,” you immediately deadpanned.

"What? I didn’t even say anything!"

“But you thought something. I'm not answering biology questions while I mix cement or some shit. Stop hanging out with my dad."

He let out a laugh at the memory you brought up. "Chill, I'm not gonna make you mix cement!” 

"Then can’t we just take a break? Pleeeeease?”

“We can take a break when you can answer the questions! You can’t fail biology, it’s one of the only classes we have together!”

“That is so, so sweet babe, but I really don’t think anything will motivate me more than a break right now.”

"Come on, we’ve been studying this for hours, you know this! No two people have the same DNA, but there’s one exception. That is...?”

"Ugh, Fine. Shit. Uh, brothers?”

"Yeah!" 

“Really?” You were genuinely surprised with yourself for getting that one right.

“I told you you knew this!”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever. I still don’t get the motivation part though,. I’m still very much bor-” he shut you right up by leaning over the various textbooks that laid on the bed between the two of you, pressing his lips to yours in a quick kiss. 

He chuckled at your lack of reaction at the sudden action. 

“What was that?”

“Your motivation.”

“Okay. Yeah. Cool.” It was not cool. In fact, maybe you felt like your brain was on the verge of short-circuiting, but what else could you say?

“Alright. Cloning results in two individuals that are…?”

“Uh… genetically identical?”

“No.”

“Shit. Well that was fun while it lasted. Alright loverboy, why don’t we just ditch the questions and make out?”

No luck. “Not yet. Cloning results in two individuals that are…?”

You let out an exaggerated groan at your failed attempt at ditching the quizzing, just to annoy him. “Genetically… genetically similar.”

“Yeah!” He celebrated before leaning in again, smiling into your lips as he kissed you for a little longer this time. 

“I really don’t see how exactly this is supposed to help me focus.”

“Correlation.”

“What?”

“What does cloning result in?”

“You just asked me this.”

“What does it result in?”

“Two individuals who are genetically similar.”

“See? You remembered. When you’re taking the test your brain will correlate the answer to the questions with a memory. I’m just making it a nice memory,” he shrugged, as if what he’d just said was the most obvious statement to ever be said.

“You are so weird,” you smiled, staring at him for a second. God he was cute. You leaned in to kiss him again, but he didn’t let you, leaning away from you to ask you another question.

“What does a Punnet square show?”

“Are you kidding me? I can’t kiss my own boyfriend now?”

“Not until you answer the question,” he grinned, proud of himself.

The questions went on and Miguel kept going with his so-called motivation. By the time you found yourself under him, Miguel seemed to be contempt with your amount of right answers, throwing the books out of the way to finally comply.

Yeah he was definitely pulling that correlation thing out of his ass but damn did this making out make you motivated. “This is like the best study session ever,” he stated as he pulled away to take a breath, smiling like an idiot. 

“You are so fucking cheesy, dude,” you retorted, just to tease him.

He smiled that one smile of his, shaking his head before resuming to kissing you, careful not to put too much of his weight on you, which you thought was the cutest thing he could do in a moment like this. You didn’t particularly care about that, though, only pulling him closer to you by grabbing the collar of his shir-

“Jesus kid can you please close your door? I don’t wanna come home to a porno.” 

Miguel immediately scrambled to get up from atop of you, pulling himself out of the bed entirely, which, in retrospect, was a tiny little bit really funny.

“Oh my God. Dad! Get out, what the fuck?” 

“Just keep the freakin’ door closed, Geez. And please don’t do anything while I’m here, that’s fucking weird.”

“Obviously I didn’t know you were coming back this soon!”

“You would know if you weren’t too busy swapping spit with with Diaz over here,” he motioned over to Miguel with his head, making you take a glance at him, who looked like he was trying really hard to develop the ability to become invisible, scratching the back of his neck and looking at the ceiling as if he hadn’t just been mentioned. “I sent you a message on that… text thing.”

“You sent me a text?”

“Yeah, whatever you call it. I’m not a nerd.”

“Well sorry. Miguel’s going home anyway so.”

“I am?”

“Yes, you are.” There was no way he would be able to stay for much longer without hyperventilating.

“Yeah! Right! I am. Just just about to head out. Yup.”

“Okay. Whatever. Next time I’ll yell that I’m home so I don’t have to see… that,” he motioned between you vaguely.

“There wasn’t even anything happening you baby! And I said I’m sorry!”

“What fucking ever!”

“Okay,” was all you managed to reply before he left, closing the bedroom door behind him. You were too embarrassed to say anything else.

“Okay. Uh,” Miguel started, but he didn’t know what to say either, mortified by the idea of his sensei catching him making out with you.

“I don’t think he’s gonna be able to look us in the eye after this.”

“Good thing I only see him every single fucking day.”

“Oh my God,” you buried your face in your hands in embarrassment, trying to regain your composure. 

“At- at least he’s okay with it! I thought he was gonna kill me for a moment there.”

“He likes you too much. He just gets really weird about this sort of thing.”

There was a knock on the door. “Are you decent?”

“We were never not decent!” You defended yourself. Johnny opened the door slowly, carefully scanning the room as to not see anything unsolicited. “Kid’s gotta go.”

“You’re aware I’m not a child, aren’t you?”

“Well duh. But I know the advice I gave him about this stuff before you two started… whatever this is, and I need to take everything back.”

“What?”

“Dad.”

“What? A Sensei can’t have a nice guy talk with his student?”

“Uh-” Miguel murmured, glancing at you nervously.

“I’ll be waiting by the door,” he shot Miguel a condescending smile before leaving. 

“I’ll see you tomorrow?” 

“You think there will be a tomorrow for me?” He joked.

“I don’t know. What ‘advice’ is he talking about?”

“Uh…” He scratched the back of his neck again, like he always did whenever he was uncomfortable.

“Oh my fucking god. You did not get sex advice from my fucking dad,” you stated, in denial. 

“It was before we even had anything!”

“Well I fucking hope so! It’s still fucking weird.”

“I know, I try not to think about it.” He paused. “You think he’s gonna kill me?”

“He’ll go easy on you.”

“I’m not sure.”

“He will!”

“Promise?”

You kissed him goodbye instead of answering. “Good luck!”

And wouldn’t you know it? Your tests came back with a big red A- in the front page. You could definitely see yourself catching an interest for genetics. Maybe you did just need some motivation. 

As long as you keep the door closed.

[. . .]

A/N: think im writing for miguel again. like actual new stuff that makes sense to me at my now old age of 20 (lol) so if ya want request away

[princessbrunette]

Johnbee x reader and that scene in season 1 where kie flirted with the guard to distract him but its reader instead,, jb would get so jealous and overprotective :(( but readers wiggling her fingers chanting "the gold" in his face to persuade him 😹😹

≽^• ⩊ •^≼ ₊˚⊹♡

“yeah, you know i don’t love this idea. i mean — does she really have to flirt with him? seems a little unnecessary to me.” john b complains, resisting the urge to roll his eyes as he pulls into the scrap yard.

“the guy that works there is like super old and gross, im sure you’ll be fine, jombee.” you tease from the passenger seat of the twinkie, teeth glimmering in the late afternoon with a wide amused smile. he presses his lips together, glancing your way.

“its just a quick in and out job. she hops in, bats her eyelashes and plays hello titty with the worker, whilst the three of us sneak in, get the shit we need and peel. it’s easy, dude. trust.” jj relays, leaning forward from the backseat to command everyone’s attention.

“okay, really? hello titty?” john b deadpans softly, twisting his body in his seat to give jj a flat look. the blonde shrugs, giving the back of your seat an encouraging slap.

“look, whatever dude. let her work her magic.”

“i don’t know.” john b’s big brown puppy dog eyes are back on you, forehead crinkled in concern. you feel for him for a second, but you know it’s for the better,

“for the record, i’m also not the biggest fan of this plan.” pope chimes in and jj chortles immaturely.

“bars, that rhymed.”

“shutup.”

“oh—”

“c’mon john b, it’s for the gold.” you lean forward seductively, giving him your best cutesy doll eyes as you fiddle with the bandana round his neck. you physically watch him melt, his face pained as his eyes jump down to where you’re pressing your tits together. “dont you wanna get the gold?”

“jesus, fine. ‘kay? you win, but if that guys gets touchy we’re calling it off.” he warns, pushing open his car door.

“damn, she totally just worked her magic on you dude. she’s gonna ace this.” jj grins excitedly, following everyone as they exit the vehicle.

≽^• ⩊ •^≼ ₊˚⊹♡

[mimez-meme]

Tenya iida headcanons‼️🥳

Owns all social media that his class has to monitor them and make sure their posting ‘appropriate’ stuff or nothing mean.

Linked to the last hc, has twitter. He has a fan acc of his brother to show his support and he will correct anyone who gets any info wrong about tensei

Likes comics and wants to make one of his own one day and he has written his own little book, but it isn’t published or anything it’s just on his computer. (The book can be about anything you guys think he would write about.)

He makes sure to get to class early to leave little compliments or motivation quotes on the board for the students to see when they arrive

Struggles to tell the difference between platonic and romantic feelings, once thought he had a crush on ochako but he didn’t (or did, depends if you ship them)

Straight ally but demiromantic. Makes sure to show his support the best he can.

Use to have imaginary friends when younger, people lowkey thought he was crazy. He still sometimes thinks about them, but knows their fake obv.

Has a friend from childhood who moved away, they still have contact with eachother and iida loves to send letters to them. He sometimes complains to them about his class.. not in a bad way tho ofc.

Has a pet lizard named lizzy

tried to learn French for aoyama and when he tried to speak French with him he accidentally said something inappropriate and he still can’t stop thinking about it.

Doesn’t really understand emojis, he mostly just uses ‘<3’ ‘:)’ ect. Once when delivering sad news to someone by text he used ‘😹’ thinking it was crying. He learnt it wasn’t and apologised to that same person whenever he remembers about it

Pulls bitches. But he doesn’t necessary want to be in a relationship along with being a hero. However he does have a mini crush on momo but is in denial (I’m an iidamomo shipper leave me alone😓✊🏻)

Photogenic. he doesn’t even know he is, but he looks good without even trying🙏

Vegetarian

Daily phone time is atleast 30mins-an hour

Has a random obsession with jelly fishes. He knows so many facts about them. He just finds them interesting and pretty. Sometimes he would be like to his friends “this jelly fish reminds me of you!” Via message normally

Loves pugs. He owns one.✊🏻

Use to get called sonic a lot as a kid and still now but he didn’t know who sonic was, denki forced iida to watch a sonic movie and now he lowkey likes them, he watches sonic in his free time.. no one knows.

Sees special and amazing traits in all his classmates. He observes them the best he can so he can help them. Always knows how to compliment them and comfort them.

As a kid he found his quirk to be quite boring and nothing special but his brother helped him to see the amazing part of his quirk.

Mild-dyslexia, mild- ocd

Doesn’t really have a type, mostly goes for personality not looks.

Once didn’t do up his top button to be ‘ rebellious’ but no one noticed😕

Not the best at reading the room unless it’s really obvious

HATES wasps, bees or any ‘loud’ insect. He doesn’t know why but he does.

Fear of being abandoned and small spaces

Didn’t learn how to drive a car until he was 25

Has a projector in his dorm

Always feels ashamed of having problems. People have it worse. Are they even considered problems? It’s hard for him to open up, he normally hates to, especially if he knows the person he’s opening up to or is offering to talk has it worse.

Struggles to sleep due to his quirk, and he just struggles. He sometimes has nightmares about loosing his brother, friends and the first time he, izuku, todoroki, momo, Kiri met AFO

Views todoroki as a brother. (If that make sense..)

Grew up watching mr bean (just hear me out on him being a mr bean kid and even having me beans teddy irl🙏)

Doesn’t like going to graveyards or any religious place like a church beacuse he gets an off putting feeling, he feels like he’s being disrespectful yk? And he doesn’t like thinking about death. (He respects religions don’t get him wrong! This headcanon is lowkey based on me except I like going to graveyards)

Brings hand sanitiser with him no matter what

Present mic and Shouta use to look after iida sometimes when he was younger since in my au tensei and then are friends. Iida has a very vivid memory of Shouta and zashi kissing infront of him and a vivid memory of hizashi offering him beer😭

Listens to motivation music, I did have a song in mind but I forgot 😭🙏 and he listens romance music.. also once went to jirou for help on music.

Watched the titanic and cried.

Loves sunsets, always goes out and sees them, takes photos, invites people to just look at the sky with him. He finds it relaxing and a way to appreciate nature

Likes tea and biscuits, hot chocolate but doesn’t like coffee and not a massive fizzy drink fan, only really likes orange fanta

Basically knows all the drama. People usually come to him to just complain or talk about drama and he always overhears stuff without meaning to

Has all the wimpy kids books but no one knows

Fav animals are jelly fishes and seals.. he like sea animals if you couldn’t tell.

Has the NASTIEST side eye

MASSIVE gentlemen, he treats all girls/women with respect.

Fantastic listener however he can be distracted like if someone was doing something bad behind you or in his view he will pay attention to that person until he can’t hold it in anymore and tells them off as you were talking he but then apologises.

Not fully Japanese he’s 25% Swedish, 10% Greek

Is mei’s personal ‘test doll’ (nothing romantic 😭)

Everyone always asks him for piggy back rides and he doesn’t understand why. He’s only given piggy back rides to children, uraraka and people who need it like injured people. He figured it was because he can run fast and he wants people to experience it.

Has central heterochromia

Gets cold easily and always overdresses for winter

Likes decision games but most of the time picks the wrong decisions..and he like murder mystery games, he’s good but not the best

(Sorry if any spelling mistakes)

[luvmanifesting]

WHY’RE YOU GIVING UP?

Is it because you’re too busy dwelling in the 3D?

Is it because you’re being pathetic and watching other people’s success stories and comparing it to yourself?

Is it because you’re constantly complaining?

Is it because you can’t handle the fact you’re GOD because of religious beliefs?

Is it because you convinced yourself on PURPOSE that you can’t achieve anything?

Whatever it is get over it. You’re God, you’ve always been God. Rather you like it or not. I don’t wanna see; “Oh but—“ Shut up. I’m tired of seeing people complain and complain about the same stuff when its so easy. Does the word “EASY” not ring a bell in your small brain? When people say something is easy then its easy, nobody’s going to manifest for you. Do it yourself.

Its funny to me because I know after this post you’re going to do the same thing AGAIN (😹) complain, go into someone’s DM’s asking them to do this for you..go in some pretty girls tiktok comments and say “oh to look like this” or even worse (go on Character AI) -pathetic go shower.

While everyone’s out here manifesting and getting their dream life you’re stuck being a bum and living your same old boring life. (Crazy right? I wonder why they’re getting their dream life.)

Assume, Persist, Done.

If this was too harsh, then it was directly FOR YOU.

[ryescapades]

— some valorant gamer bf!rin headcanons bcs college is kicking my ass and im so grumpy everyday that i couldnt get to play my fav game 😞

btw gn!reader also plays valorant in this hc (definitely not projecting here haha)

gamer!rin as your valorant duo

i can see rin as the type who’d main the initiator agents for some reason (ok but he radiates the kayo/skye main vibes idk why lol). not exactly one who does lineups (according to him that’s so lukewarm and cringe. just get headshots, idiot.) and maybe some duelists here and there???? specifically jett and yoru

loves Loves LOVES tricking the enemy team when he’s using yoru’s ult iykwim. get in their heads, does the most insane moves ever, popping blinds and teleports here and there 🤯

an absolute monster in bed with the sheriff and operator wbk

to hell with sage and jett duo, yall are the constantly top fragging reyna-jett duo yessir

if rin is already so protective as a boyfriend, you bet yo ass he’d defend you in game as well whenever some jerks decide to flame you for not doing well in the game or something.

itoshi “hey. mute him and me as well. at least until i say i’m done.” rin who then proceeds to brutally shit on those bastards while top fragging the whole match 😳

smokes you off when you’re planting/defusing the spike when he’s playing as jett <3

pls do put your whole trust on him to protect you while you’re planting/defusing bcs he will do so, flawlessly at that .would genuinely get offended if u dont 😭😭 (some of my friends are like this too lol)

rin rarely plays competitive (i hc him as a plat or maybe diamond player) bcs he doesnt want to make the lobby too hard for you. unless you’re also on par with him, then omg yall are the finest duo ever wtf me when :(

rin and you play unrated games together as a date, and mans lowkey gonna get so annoyed if bachira (or any one of his friends tbh) suddenly pops up on his discord notification saying him and isagi are joining yall LMFAO

he drops skins for you and vice versa, yall even have matching knife skins too hwhsjshdjsjs

prolly an enthusiast for the ruination, reaver, origin and sovereign bundle (debatable tho)

rin rly doesn’t like being told what to do so naturally he hates being backseated/backsitting people. however if you tell him to do so to you, he doesn’t mind doing it but not too much

he also wouldn’t mind explaining or teaching you some tricks or anything really, regarding the game so he’d be so patient w you and stuff (unless you purposely keep saying you don’t understand, then he will bitch abt it 😹)

you and him sync so well in game ykyk the amount of trust you put on each other and understanding the other’s gameplay in whatever situation aaaaaa i want a duo like that too 😞

rin malds (if u dont know, its basically mad+balding /gets hella angry) quite a lot whenever he’s playing w shidou or bachira his friends/solo queuing but not when he’s w you 😽 that doesn’t stop him from (affectionately) dissing you whenever you whiff your shots tho LMFAO

also the type who’d just chill before the round starts (unlike some people cough cough me who likes to run around knifing at the wall or some shit)

he’s always available to play the game with you all night if you just so much as ask for it. he’d be down in a heartbeat no questions asked 🤞

also secretly loves whenever you’re not playing, you decide to just chill/take a nap on his lap while he plays the game. it’s one way of having some physical touch + spending quality time w you while doing the thing he enjoys 🥹🫶

praises you whenever you get a kill or clutch the round albeit a little curtly, but u can’t rly complain bcs his voice ..mmm chefs kiss id melt into a measly puddle at that spot ong (praise him too pls he’d get so motivated to get more kills but ofc he’d never let you know that hehe)

WOULD BE SO PROUD OF YOU IF YOU GET AN ACE but he’d hide it kwhshshdkwhsjs mans doesn’t wanna boost your ego cuz he knows you’re gonna be a menace abt it 😈

all in all, gamer bf!rin is an 11/10 i love him sm why is he not real i hate it here

[jalwyn21]

Taylor reminds me so much of my customers when I worked food service. The constant need to be right, demanding service first, complaining about the wait on their order that they never actually put in, “I’m here all the time you should know what I want” she’s a total koffee klub karen. It’s very clear between her and Joe, who’s worked a service job and who’s never had to work a day in their life.

This! OMG! Yes!

Yes, Joe grew up very privileged but you can tell he is not disconnected from the real world. And, most importantly, he doesn't think himself to be better that others mere mortals.

You can tell she never lived a day of her life in the real world and thinks she is the best thing to have happen to humanity. 🙄 (I know my love should be celebrated 🙄🙄🙄🙄 I'm the best thing at this party 😹😹😹)

[thewanderingfili]

I Bloody Hate Upper Body Days…

I’m knackered, but I won’t give up just yet because my mum didn’t raise a quitter (raised a massive complainer, though, but that might be a cultural thing).😤

Also, I’m contemplating going back to England in September for yet another play… and, yes, Barry Sloane’s in it.😅😹

[hoonvrs]

what do ur moots remind you of?! (ex. places, color, song, etc)

@dazed-hee TIFF heeseung duh, exo and those ugly little white dogs, heehoon

first two don’t need an explanation, but she’s alw sending me igs of these white korean dogs knowing i’m a CATT girl. exo x enha tiktok when. us being heehoon is obvious🙄 we’re just superior

@redm4ri MARI hoon, piercings, music

my fellow hoon lover, our convos on music and piercings are just elite also how’s the rook piercing going bae cause mine is being a bitch rn

@haevqi LIZZIE hugs, cherries/peaches, vollyball

lizzie is actually my baby you don’t understand, even though we only become moots fairly recently i love talking to her sm </3 sports because we’re both volleyball girls ( ignore that i quit ) 💪🏼 and cherries and peaches cause they’re some of my fave things and so is liz ily

@aernx AERIN games, anything pretty

yk how u can tell someone’s pretty by how they type, that’s rinnie. my baby #2. so sweet ily and games cause we alw tag each other in them duhh

@shinsou-rii RI alevels, sister

the little sister i never had💔 us bonding over our alevels being almost identical and complaining about it🥹 felt like a proud older sister

@enmayz MIRA hellcats, flowers

hellcats are v specific over that ask of us talking about stealing ur friends car😭 flowers cause she alw sends me cute flowers she find cause she know i love them ( i love her more shh )

@flwrshee RIRI gardens/sea

those places that are so calming and beautiful give riri vibes, pretty and aesthetic ( js like u winks )

@whoschr CHAE neutral colours, tiny

moment of silence for the iconic tnyhees user.. i still call you tny in my head whenever we interact😭 neutral colours cause they’re so pretty and aesthetic and chaes aesthetic nvr fail😹 trust

@seongclb KAT cats .. hearts

hearts cause i ❤️ kat simple. and obvi can’t think of kat and not think of cats and guess who loves both😁

@haknom KAYLA justin bieber, criminal love

us screaming over hoon and criminal love on disc is so real. and just bieber cause

[dadsdaugther]

so today we’ve been out for 5 hours and the first 3 hours were fine but the last two I got more and more tired. So I wanted to leave a restaurant we sat on and my mom got mad and told me about how “when she has a fever, she takes some pills and go to work” LOL and “I don’t understand how you can just there and be silent when we are in Amsterdam” and I was SO tired I could feel the fever getting back and I always pulled mentally away from my mom bc she has been such a bitch since I got sick.

and then she was about to discuss with me again in the hotel lobby so I asked her to go to her room to talk. We then talked and I tried to talk as calmly as possible. Bc if I raise my voice a little I’m serious she will break my fucking neck 🥴😹 so I tried to explain how I felt and she then changed her narrative from “you need to get your shit together, take some pills and socialise with me” to “you need to explain to me what you can and cannot do” and she did in a fucking SECOND and she didn’t even notice how her own point changed😹 and when I pointed it out to her she was like “THatS WhaT I BeEn TeLLiNg YoU” 😹 and I just thought like wtf no????? You told me a second ago to get my shit together bc you were bored at a restaurant bc I didn’t speak for a while.

fighting with my mom is so confusing bc she can never remember what she said herself or she choose to forget it and she keeps making the same points even tho I’ve agreed with her a while ago 😹😹

and then in the end she was like “I don’t think we should travel again together” with a very serious face and I think she expected a sad reaction but I was just like I agree 😹

and then I tried to refer to out trip to Madrid where she got ill and I was like “last time in Madrid when you were sick, we handled it so well but this time around it’s not working”. And what I mean by that is “I helped you 96 hours bc I loved you, you’ve helped me for 48 hours and you’ve complained the whole time about it AND you’re constantly trying to guilt trip me into doing more” 😹 like this is so sad but also funny to me