#I’m nature aligned y'all

[bushkit]

The Yappening: Daemos Magic Information!

Magic is a major influence on the Daemos’ lifestyle, culture, society and so much more, and it’s important for the environment as well. Daemos magic is as important to the continent of Tramea as a whole as it is to the daemos. Magic is most commonly used in Spellcasting, a method of releasing magic to accomplish a task or intent. Enchantment is often more difficult to accomplish and is more rare, but it does exist though it only affects objects. Daemos magic is most known for it’s flashiness, all alignments can produce spells with a dazzling appearance that mesmerizes those unfamiliar with it and sometimes even the daemos themselves.

Magi:

Magi is the term used for physical magic. Three forms of it exist within the daemos, positive magi, neutral magi, and negative magi. Neutral magi doesn't have power of it’s own until it is summoned by a spell, afterwards by unknown means the neutral magi becomes positive magi and escapes the body, resulting in spell casting. Negative magi is magi that has already been used, and will be more explained in a moment.

Basic Magic:

All daemos possess and are capable of preforming basic magic (provided they have magi), which is very commonly used for basic everyday things such as cleaning, hygiene, entertainment, and hunting.

Magic Residue:

Magic residue or negative magi is the direct result of positive magi after all daemos spells are cast, but the concentration varies on the strength and complexity of the spell. Small, basic spells release such a small amount that it cannot be seen with the eye. However, when a daemos casts a very powerful and very complicated spell, such as the portal spell that Asch and Lady Bish used, a large amount of magic residue will remain. Magic residue can be a powerful ingredient in potions and is also great for plants as it can be used as an efficient fertilizer.

Potions:

Most potions aren't inherently magical, as they don't require spells for them to take effect. Thanks to Tramea’s large and diverse forms of magic that spread across multiple different species of plants and animals, there are many ingredients that can be used in potions to create a large variety of effects. Potions aren't as diverse or powerful as Spells, but they are easier to create and don't require as much study.

Alignments:

All Daemos belong to a certain magic type, these are called Alignments. Each alignment has an array of its own special spells, behavior, and features that make Daemos unique from one another. Daemos do not have the ability to cast all known spells, because they are split into alignments. For example, a Nature-aligned Daemos cannot cast a freezing spell whereas a Frost-aligned Daemos can. Some neutral spells can be enhanced with an alignment if it will allow. Hybridization between alignments isn't possible, the offspring of two Daemos with different alignments have a 50/50 chance of inheriting one of their parent’s alignments. (For example if a Flame-aligned and Light-aligned daemos had two offspring together, their children may both be Flame-aligned but there's an equal chance they could have been Light-aligned or one Flame one Light.)

Frost-Aligned:

The laid-back Frost Aligned Daemos have ice magic, very elegant and very beautiful. Ice magic is quite powerful, and fairly uncommon, making it desired amongst higher rankings. Another reason for this is that much like Fire magic, Ice magic can be very dangerous, being able to freeze living things and objects in place; which can kill slowly but humanely. Frost Aligned daemos tend to be pretty heat resistant, due to their naturally lower body temperature.

Flame-Aligned:

Flame-aligned daemos have fire magic, the rarest, most powerful and impressive type of magic among all daemos. Because of this, flame-aligned daemos are considered to be royalty. Fire magic is very deadly, due to the fact it's well- fire. Some of the most complicated and most powerful spells can only be cast by a daemos who possesses fire magic. These daemos have louder personalities which can be a great ally paired with royalty status. Flame-aligned daemos are immune from being burned by their own fire, however any fire that they have not conjured can burn them. Due to a naturally higher body temperature flame-aligned daemos are quite cold hardy, but not immune.

Bolt-Aligned:

Bolt-aligned daemos are very unique, they're the only alignment that have very slight future sight. While it requires training, bolts can predict when storms are brewing due to their high sensitivity to changes in air pressure and the electrons in the atmosphere. Bolts are also quite bright and expressive, making them a popular choice should you want to befriend a daemos. Bolt-aligned daemos are known to be fast and light on their feet, making them formidable fighters. Bolt magic is sometimes confused for Light magic due to their slightly similar appearance, however Bolt magic is far more useful for offensive situations. Still, some consider Bolt magic to be a form of Light magic.

Light-Aligned:

Light-aligned daemos are a common sight in the Daemos Empire, being famous for the breathtaking flashiness of their Magic. Light-aligned daemos have a wide range of spells, but not many are used for offensive maneuvers. Light-aligned daemos tend to be more passive and mellow than the other alignments, hence why spells used for attack are uncommon. If a battle is necessary, Light-aligned daemos will mostly use defensive and illusional magic to protect themselves and to distract their opponent long enough to ambush them. Lights are the only ones that mainly use melee weapons in battle.

Nature-Aligned:

Nature-aligned daemos are very common in urban areas of the daemos kingdoms. Most daemos with this alignment are very knowledgeable about foliage and fauna and rely on ambush hunting and attacking, utilizing their environment. They are masters at stealth and survival, making them highly valued as spies and assassins. These daemos can be quite feisty, matching the wild nature of the wilderness they are familiar with. Nature-aligned daemos are famous for their healing spells, which are far more advanced and efficient than any other alignment. Most daemos who have an interest in or choose to be healers are Nature-aligned.

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

At last, I have released yet another Yappening!

I love the daemos, and making headcanons on their magic is so much fun like literally I have a blast each time! I was planning on putting a couple more into this Yappening, but they weren't exactly related to magic itself enough so I'm just going to make a separate Yappening for them! Enjoy the lil doodle of Noi freaking out cause he’s sensing rain incoming, he isn’t trained very well but he can sense small drops in air pressure and when rain is about to fall! This would be before he got his magic drained, otherwise he wouldn't be able to sense anything at all.

Next Yappening: Blazebloods

Goodbye pookies!

[just-jordie-things]

hii! if you’re still taking drabble reqs i’m in need of secret relationship w/yuta, megumi and toge (but you can add whoever you want honestly ~ )

yes omg now that my tbah series project is wrapped up i can finally get back into drabbles for y'all !! _

OKKOTSU YUUTA

ok you weren't trying to keep your relationship secret at first, things just got out of hand and then there was never a good time to bring it up.

when you and yuuta first confessed your feelings for each other in small whispers during a night you'd stayed up late because sleep was hard when you were a jujutsu sorcerer- you'd been ecstatic. nervous stammering and shy hands brushing against one another turned to bright grins and small kisses. you'd both been so relieved that your feelings were returned and your friendship hadn't been totaled by a premature confession.

and while you were certain those feelings weren't going anywhere, you both prioritized the group dynamic over anything else. your friends would surely be supportive of such an advancement in your relationship, still, you and yuuta agreed to give it a month or two to before breaking the news. just to be sure.

six months had passed. oops.

but it wasn't on purpose! no! you were all so busy, if there wasn't a mission there was constant schoolwork to catch up on, and then there was the whole sukuna's vessel thing, and it seemed that there was just no such thing as 'the right time' so it kinda got put on the back burner, and, well, it's how you found yourself in this situation.

it had been a rare occasion where yours and yuuta's schedules had aligned. he'd just gotten back from a mission and you weren't set to go on one for another week. a week was a blessing in this line of work, so you treated it like a vacation. (even though there was still schoolwork and training, any free time you had you devoted to yuuta)

like right now. you'd invited yourself into his dorm and lounged on his bed contentedly on your phone while he was reading a book. you didn't even speak much to one another. you were just happy to be tucked under his arm and leaning against the same pillow together.

you'd probably been cuddled up together for the last fifteen minutes, occasionally sharing a kiss, or a meme you'd found, when you finally asked him what he'd been reading.

blushing, yuuta lowered the book so you could peer onto the pages. a smile stretches over your lips as your eyes skim the poetry before looking back at him.

"poetry, hm?" you tease with that soft, cruel tone you use that makes him melt for you all over again. "as if you couldn't get anymore romantic, yuu"

he scoffs at the statement, shaking his head rapidly.

"just wanted to try something different-" he tries to defend himself, but you cut him off before he could finish his pitiful attempt.

"read to me"

"really?"

you nod furiously, even turning off your phone and dropping it to your lap so you could give him your full attention. yuuta's still blushing from his neck to his ears, but he couldn't possibly refuse.

he flips a few pages back, mumbling something about finding just the right one, before he clears his throat and softly reads the words aloud to you.

your head falls to his shoulder, your chest warm, your heart full, and you prod yuuta into reading more as you melt into his warmth and comfort.

it had been such a sweet, intimate moment. your happiness from spending time together turned to pure bliss as the poetry fell from his lips so naturally it was as though he'd written the words himself.

saying it had been ruined by the door crashing open wouldn't be right, because nothing could truly take away your current ecstasy, but it had been a shock.

"MUSTARD LEAF?"

you both yelped in surprise at toge's sudden forced energy, too in shock to realize the compromising position you shared on yuuta's bed.

whatever reason toge had shown up for was never really brought up, because as soon as he caught two of his best friends cuddling with a book of poetry held between them, he'd known exactly what he'd stumbled in on, and he was sending out texts to the rest of your friends in an instant, muttering out onigiri ingredients in shock.

it took a lot of convincing to your friends that you hadn't intended to hide your relationship from them. even now, months later, you don't think they believe you.

but they are happy for you :) ___

FUSHIGURO MEGUMI

megumi really had to work up the courage to tell you how he felt. in fact, he'd almost talked himself out of it. he'd spent long enough deciphering the feelings himself. he wasn't familiar with the way his heartbeat sped up when you were close to him, or how his ears felt hot when you'd compliment him, or choose him first as a partner.

(honestly, it probably took him, like, months to realize he had a crush on you. gojo probably had to help him a little, against his will)

so imagine how long it took for him to finally do something about. yeesh. go easy on this boy.

when he does pull you away somewhere private and mumble out so many words they're slurring together but they're all so lovely and soft that you figure out exactly what he's saying, or trying to say anyways.

"anywaysijustwantedtotellyou," his words pick up in pace when he comes to his conclusion, the reality of his confession making his embarrassment grow. "youdon'thavetosayanything"

you grab his hand and squeeze it gently, conveying your appreciation through action, because your first words are a bit confusing.

"we probably shouldn't tell anyone," you say in a hushed voice. "at least for a while, i think our friends will be kind of annoying about it, they're kind of annoying like that,"

you're only teasing, judging by the fond smile on your lips, but megumi can't really make out what you're saying. his brows furrow, and his eyes are flickering rapidly between yours, silently asking for further context.

"well, think about it," you prompt, "do you really want yuuji teasing us about going out?"

"going out?" megumi repeats the words softly, almost in disbelief.

"what, did you want to confess and then never do anything about it?" you snort, your nose crinkling as you smile up at him.

megumi thinks his heart is swelling too much. he might need to have shoko check him out. this couldn't be normal. or safe.

"like- like dating? like on a date? together?"

you're giggling, and your hand squeezes his again. he's the cutest thing and he has no idea, you think to yourself. this isn't a new thought.

"yeah, like dating. like on a date. together," you repeat his words, just to tease him a little bit.

"okay," megumi says, and he finally smiles, no, grins, at the idea. he didn't exactly have high expectations when he confessed to you, or any expectations at all. this was definitely best case scenario. "we definitely can't tell anyone," he agrees as soon as he thinks about it for longer than a second.

he couldn't imagine the torture nobara and yuuji would put him through.

or worse.

gojo.

"maybe ever" he adds with wide, panicked eyes.

you laugh again, before standing on the tips of your toes to plant a kiss on his cheek. like magic, you watch pink spread over the area instantaneously.

(needless to say gojo knows about the shift in your relationship pretty much right away. he does you both the favor of keeping it to himself... for a week) ___

INUMAKI TOGE

it had been pretty easy to keep your relationship with toge a secret. your friendship had always been a rather close one, so seeing physical affection between you two wasn't out of the norm. hugs, light touches, maybe a little cuddling, nothing really changed outwardly to your classmates.

and it had just been easier to keep the relationship private. neither of you wanted things to change. you didn't want to be treated any differently. had you made your relationship public, you probably wouldn't be partnered up as often for missions, and honestly, you and toge were a killer duo on the field.

(you also didn't want panda teasing you anymore than he already did, so that was also a good enough reason to keep it private)

so you two shared your kisses and whispers of meaningless whispers of nothing behind closed doors. pretty much your entire first year. toge's limited speech was actually helpful. it's not like he had to worry about slipping up too much.

it wasn't until a few weeks into your second year that anyone called you out.

of course as soon as itadori yuuji was introduced to the second years, he'd noticed right away. how, you weren't sure. you'd just been standing beside toge- you weren't even touching! but yuuji had caught the way your eyes had met a couple times, sharing silent words, so when introductions were over he'd outright asked.

"you guys are together, right?"

inumaki's eyes went wide, and behind his collar his jaw even dropped. you froze completely, your expression and body unmoving, while all eyes turned to you.

in hindsight, the lack of response from you and toge is probably what made things worse. had you calmly laughed it off and said you were close friends, you definitely could have gotten the heat off of you.

but you were so shocked that yuuji had asked you so blatantly! or that he'd even noticed at all!

maki, panda, and megumi all stood there with their shocked expressions, the longer you remained silent, the more they began to realize that yuuji had called you out in a matter of minutes after meeting you, when they'd all known you for years!

"salmon"

toge is the first to speak, with an affirmative nod to yuuji's question. you're still in a state of shock, even more so now that he's admitted to it.

yuuji, the precious kind of guy he is, just smiles and nods back, thinking you seemed like a cool couple, and was pretty oblivious to the reactions of everyone else.

"what!?" maki screeches when she finally finds her voice.

"for how long?" megumi's question follows.

"does yuuta know?" panda already has his phone in hand, rapidly texting their classmate that was overseas currently.

(with the time change, you don't get yuuta's reaction until hours later, and it's no different than the others)

[yuuta] : i can't believe you guys didn't tell me !! :o [yuuta] : i better get details !! >:( [yuuta] : obviously I always knew [yuuta] : but it's the principle of the thing!!!!!

even after your secret is out in the open, nothing changes much. you and toge are just as affectionate as ever, and your friends kick themselves for not realizing sooner. ___

y'all know i can't add gojo bc there's just no effing way he'd ever keep your relationship a secret. he'd definitely group text shoko and nanami the second you make your relationship official there's a romantic shift in your dynamic.

[litnerdwrites]

Another late one. I'm so sorry! I had so many different ideas while editing this one, I'd hardly call it the same fic as the original anymore. I think I like this one much, much better though. Two days left, and that's kind of a bummer, but I've enjoyed seeing everyone else's works this week. Maybe it's because TOS will be out in October but I loved writing for Gluttony, and I have so many ideas for him. Enough that I was thinking of making this one a short series, if you'd like? I think I'll post a couple of theme over the coming weeks, if you want? Or would y'all prefer a different Prince? lmk!. @princeofsinweek

Day 5: Gluttony/Champagne Fountains

Indulge in you - Gluttony x Reader

WC:1,548

TW: Nothing explicit and nothing outside of canon.

You blink. 

Once. 

Twice. 

Three times. 

Your eyes dart to Prince Gluttony’s, then back again. 

The singular, slitted, beady eye feels like it’s staring right through you. It’s unnerving enough that you quickly turn back to the prince leaning against the side of your house, grinning like a fool.

“What- What is this?” 

Gluttony raises a brow at you. 

“An Ice dragon,” he says, like it’s completely obvious. 

“I can see that,” you mutter. 

“Then why ask?” 

You bring your hands together.

Eyes closed, you take in a breath. 

Hold it. 

Let it out. 

Slowly, you turn to him, holding your hands in front of your stomach, palms pressed together. 

“Then allow me to rephrase, your highness.” Gluttony’s grin only widens at your exasperated tone. “Why is it here? As in outside of my house,” you glance behind the dragon’s head, noting the lack of a body, “And where’s the rest of it?” 

Gluttony santers over, examining the creature from beside you. Hazel eyes shift from the creature to you, studying your reaction. 

“It’s a gift,” he replies, “As for the rest of it, it’s being broken down for the useful, and valuable materials as we speak. It’ll be brought for you then,” 

“You will do no such thing,” you scowl, “Aren’t you more the type to hoard the wealth from those conquests, than share them?” 

“Eh, that’s more aligned with Greed’s circle,” he shrugs, “And I am indulging in my sin, so don’t get your panties in twist,” Gluttony’s eyes slide to you, “Unless you ski-” 

“Don’t finish that,” you snap. 

He raises a brow, his grin turning sly. 

“Oh? Does that mean I’m right, and you aren’t-” he’s cut off by a fist to his arm, but laughs it off, “Getting defensive are we? You wouldn’t happen to mind if I checked-” another punch lands, this time to his face. 

Gluttony just laughs, while you go back to watching the creature.

“I’m being serious Ax,” you huff, “Why did you bring that thing here?” 

You turn from the creature, to Gluttony, otherwise known as Gabriel Axton, trying to figure out what he was up to. Yet, as per usual, he gives nothing away. Instead, he approaches the creature’s head, studying it.

“Do you not like it?” he asks, not looking back.

“It’s not that, I just- I appreciate the gesture, but I don’t need-” 

“You and I both know that what one needs is rarely ever a factor where I’m concerned,” he scoffs, “Overindulgence is the very nature of my existence, and that remains true, even now,” 

“I want to tell you off, but I can’t even be mad at you,” you whisper, shaking your head, brow pinched between your pointer and thumb. 

“I don’t understand why you keep fighting it. I can feel your desires, and I know when you lie, so there’s little use bothering to hide what you want,” Gluttony shrugs, eyeing you up and down 

You flushed red at his words, heart pounding at the insinuation, before you turned your head away, and pressed a hand over your mouth.

“That’s neither here nor there,” you muttered into your palm, “I can’t accept this,” 

“Why not?” he asks, “It’s a gift,” 

“One that I must graciously decline, your highness,” you reiterate. 

“Why?” 

You wanted to slam your head against the walls of your cottage. He always showed up here, at the end of every week, with some kind of gift, and usually an invitation to his House of Sin, which you always decline. He then leaves, often looking like a kicked puppy, and you’re left to deal with your guilt and ponder your choices into the late hours of the evening, only to do it all again the next week.

“Do you want something else?” the man in question pulls you from your thoughts. 

“Pardon?” 

“Do you want something else? I can give you whatever your heart desires, Y/N. Champagne fountains, more food than you could ever eat, the finest gowns, the rarest jewels, or even a live dragon for a pet, if that’s what you wanted,” he turns to you, watching carefully, “Name it,” 

“Ax- I-” you turn your head away, “I don’t need that, nor do I want it,” 

A lie. 

One you’re sure he caught. 

You wrap your arms around yourself. 

There’s so much that you want. So, so much. 

You wanted more adventures, more thrill. You wanted to learn to hunt, and feel powerful doing so. To pursue and indulge in your interests, to take charge of your desires and own your sexuality. You wanted to dance at parties in lavish ballrooms, in overly indulgent dresses that dripped with jewels, and to indulge until you were physically unable to do so. You wanted to drink from champagne fountain after champagne fountain until nothing existed but herself and… And him.

The Prince of Gluttony, Gabriel Axton, whom you had once sheltered in your modest cabin to wait out a particularly nasty blizzard while one of his hunters were injured. Ever since then, he’d visited you often, inviting you out, offering gifts, and keeping you company. Perhaps you indulged in his presence too much, seeing as each week it became harder and harder to say ‘no’ and send him a way. A fact he was most likely aware of. 

“You’re lying,” he accuses quietly. 

“I’m not,” you argue half-heartedly. 

“You are. You know that I can tell when you’re lying, so why bother continuing?” 

You freeze, stiffening at the icy tone of  his voice. When you look up at him, his eyes don’t meet yours, still staring at the dragon’s head. 

“I- What do you want from me?” He keeps silent, refusing to answer. “Tell me!” 

His head slowly turns to you, and your eyes widen as they meet his own. Every step back is met by another step towards you, until your back collides with the cabin walls. An arm presses against the wall by your head, while Gluttony leans over you, hazel eyes locked on yours. When you refuse to lift your head, his thumb and forefinger grab your chin, forcing you to meet his gaze. 

“I want you,” he whispers, as his eyes searched your own. 

“I-”

He hushes you, before he dropped your chin, and leaned forward. You stiffen, red staining your cheeks, as he presses his nose into the crook of your neck. 

“I want to devour you. I want to claim you, over and over until you can’t remember anyone but me. Until I occupy your thoughts, your heart, and your desires, the way you have to me. I want to take, more and more, over and over, until I’ve had my fill,” he scoffs, “I think we both know that’d never happen though. I want to give you more. I want you to have everything you ever desired, even in passing, and then some. I want you to give yourself to me, your heart, body and mind. I want to indulge in you, and never stop.” 

“I- You want to-” 

He cut you off by pressing his lips to yours. Your eyes widened, flickering to his own, as he stared right back at you. You feel him ripping away each and every layer, bit by bit, uncovering every raw wound and secret you’ve ever kept. Yet, at this point, you couldn’t bring yourself to care. 

Your eyes fluttered shut, and your lips pressed into his. Your knees felt weaker, with each nip and swipe of his tongue. Had he not entirely pressed you into the wall, you’re sure you would’ve collapsed to the ground. 

After what felt like eternity, he finally pulled away.

“I want to give you everything, Y/N. Champagne fountains, caviare mounts, lavish balls, grand feasts, and more. If you asked me to carve out my very heart, or sell you my soul, I’d offer them up on silver platter in an instant,” his hands cupped your cheeks, “Let me give you everything,”

You stared up at him, cheeks flushing more under his palm. Your knees threatened to give way, but you managed to remain upright, and muster a smile. 

“Are you asking to court me, your highness?” 

“Nothing so pedestrian,” he scoffs, “I’m asking you to be mine. To let me indulge in every last piece of you. And in return, I’m giving you myself, my court, and whatever you long to indulge in, so long as you call me your own too,” 

You rolled your eyes at that, but can’t do much to hide the twinkle in them. 

“I suppose you are the prince of overindulgence. Perhaps I’ll give it a try, demon,” 

Gluttony grins down at you. 

“Just a try?” he dares.

“I have to know if I like it before I indulge,” 

He scoffs, leaning down to nip at your neck. 

“Have my previous attempts not been satisfactory?” he gestures to the ice dragon head.

Huh. You’d forgotten about that for a moment. 

“You’ve merely demonstrated your determination. Now it’s time to demonstrate just how deeply you wish to indulge. Over champagne perhaps?” 

“I shall have an entire fountain of it readied at once, should you return to my court with me,” he offered his hand.

With a tiny smile, you took it, holding tight.

“I can’t wait,” 

[dizzycoffee]

Hello! I would like to request a romantic Hazbin Hotel matchup, please! (The only character I'd rather not be matched with is Vaggie)

I’m a 19-year-old cis female. I usually romantically prefer women, but I think I might be able to date a guy if I find the right one.

I’m 5’8-9, about 140 lbs. I dress in a dark coquette style mixed with office core (?). I'm not really big on short skirts or shorts. I have a heart-shaped face with a button nose. I also have long, layered black hair with bangs. I usually wear reading glasses just to add to that office aesthetic!

I’ve been told I look pretty intimidating and mean at first glance, but I swear I’m nice! I would consider myself an ambivert; honestly, it just depends on who I’m surrounded by. I don't casually date or do one-night stands at all. For me, it’s all in or not at all. In romantic or even platonic relationships, I like to take on a dominant, motherly role. My love languages are acts of service and quality time. I’m also pretty good at reading emotions and remembering things someone likes or doesn’t like. Though I can admit a toxic trait of mine is sometimes making a decision for both me and my s/o without consulting them first. Not big decisions, I know better than that; it’s usually spur-of-the-moment things, which is something I’m trying to work on. I’m also a very protective, jealous person. When jealous, I kinda just stop talking and shut down. When close with someone, I love to try and get reactions out of them, just teasing, flirting, getting them all flustered, but as I said, I’m good at reading emotions, I can tell when someone isn’t comfortable with what I’m doing, and at that moment, I’ll apologize.

Likes: My cat, learning, vintage stuff/antiques, animals, nature, music [I can listen to anything, from Mindless Self Indulgence to Oingo Boingo to Skillet to Frank Sinatra, to.. you get the point.], movie nights, spending time with my s/o, cooking for my s/o

Dislikes: “Hive-minds,” being ignored, being in the public/surrounded by people for too long, people who complain but do nothing about it, people who are easily manipulated, untidiness

My type: Ngl I haven’t really done much dating so this is sort of tough.. I guess someone who’s romantic and just as clingy as I am? It also helps when they’re straightforward and let me know when I’ve done something to upset them. Communication is necessary for me. I like someone who’s a bit more extroverted and makes plans. I can be a bit of a shut-in, so I need that push sometimes.

I’m not really sure what else to add, so I guess that’s it! Looking forward to finding out who I got^^

hii !! hope you’re having a good day <3

You’ve been paired with …

Charlie Morningstar !

If you're looking for someone who's as equally romantic and clingy as you, it'd be none other than the princess of hell!

When you two first met, she didn't show any signs of hesitance or fear in regards to your pretty intimidating vibes - which was refreshing for a change!

Most of your likes are pretty well aligned, so you guys hit it off pretty well

Charlie is also an extrovert, so if you ever require a push, she's ready to be by your side!!

I feel like Charlie's the type to plan spontaneous dates whenever you and her have free time

She's also pretty easy-going when it comes to planning, so if there's anything you don't want to do, she can def make few alterations for your comfort

Considering how she usually takes the lead, the only way you two "clash" would be over making decisions. While you two have good communication, you two have a bad habit of making plans / decisions without confirming with the other

This has led to you two having to decided where to go / what to do which often gets resolved pretty quickly. If the decisions you both made are a little more serious than usual, maybe there could be a light argument.

HEAVY on the maybe, because the only "arguments" y'all ever have is who loves who more

Omg and the office aesthetic?? I feel like you both just compliment each other so nicely <3

[escapism-express]

a few somethins abt zan

yah… so hi! i’m zan :)

i’m 21 & from the Southern US, though i swear something in me was meant to be in Scotland…

i use a stupid amount of ellipsis, can’t decide if i want to punctuate or capitalize correctly, and get nervous around shitty grammar (makes sense, right?)

i have the mouth of a sailor, soul of a stoned grandma, ridiculous little house wife habits, and attitude for daaaaaaaays.

my fandom membership card is currently active in the following communities:

The WW of Harry Potter (all eras & no support for JKR, duh)

The Hobbit & Lord of The Rings

Star Wars

Marvel

Maas Verse (ACOTAR - I'm working my way through TOG rn)

Outlander

there are definitely more that I'm currently too stoned to remember but those are the mains anyways. i don't write currently, though I really want to start so y'all can be my lab rats 😉

being a dreamer is my main personality trait, but I can guarantee lots of ranting & shitposting regarding other things I like and/or don't like to do so here's a few more things abt me :)

I'm a spoonie for life, this December will be 9 years since I was diagnosed 💙

I have a longterm partner who we'll call Snoopy - he boarded this shit show about 8 years ago & doesn't plan on disembarking 🫶

I have zero sense of self preservation. my philosophies are to "fuck around & hope you don't find out" & that my life is a video game so I'm just along for the ride lmao

I firmly believe that therapy is for everyone, I personally go every week & am medicated.. I will SCREAM this shit if it means someone else will feel more comfortable & confident going

COFFEE IS A REQUIREMENT FOR LIVING (I'm a caffeine addict)

I'm currently attempting to figure out my spiritual alignments but I fucks with energies & nature a lot 🧙‍♀️

I like... plants... 🍃💨 - a lot

I keep music playing almost 24/7 to keep away the ✨voices✨

I have no filter, I will tell you anything & everything or nothing at all

any of that feel like you? follow meeeeeeeeee I need friends :)

okay now for the obligatory blog disclaimers:

this is an 18+ blog - minors will be blocked 🔞

I have a zero tolerance policy for bigots - we don't fuck with homophobia, transphobia, racism, sexism, ablism, or discrimination of any kind. you will be reported, dragged, and blocked.

I WILL be talking about sensitive topics, whether it's fandom or real world related there will be triggering material on this blog. I will do my best to label everything as accurately as possible but if I miss something please KINDLY let me know :)

I piss a lot of people off. my views are not widely accepted in the current climate of the south but I will not shut up. however, you can. so if you don't like me, go ahead & rest assured that I do not care 🖕🫶

once again there's probably more stuff I meant to say that I've now forgotten but my brain is jello sO we're gonna call it good.

stay tuned for... stuff(?) ...I have no real plan here.

anywhore.. have a good day, lovelies!

xoxo, zan 🫶

[jcbbby]

okay aries rising ! i have a libra rising so we have chart synastry 🤭 if you’re down to write a lil jamie fluff where she’s an astro girlie and he’s interested in it even tho he doesn’t know anything ? i understand if you can’t bc you said you don’t know much about it 😭 i’m dying to know jamie’s rising i just know he’s a virgo rising i don’t love them but my god they are beautiful so that’s okay 🤭

hmm, I'm not sure I could write a comprehensive fic because yeah, I wouldn't call myself an astrology girlie, but here's a little concept that y'all could use your imagination with maybe!

you'd ask him his time of birth to figure out his chart and he's like "what? what do you mean?"

so you explain that knowing his exact time and place of birth helps you definitively map out how the planets were aligned right when he was born, and how they align influences parts of his personality, behavior, and life in general.

"oh...that's so interesting! so it's like a fortune telling?"

"well...no, not exactly. sort of like an outline of your life and self."

"hmm, intriguing. okay, let me text my mum to see when I was born."

so then he gets that info and you calculate his chart and he's like pointing at each row and going "okay so mercury in scorpio, what does that mean?"

"so your mercury influences how we think and communicate our thoughts. so with yours in scorpio, you're drawn to thinking more about the deeper parts of yourself, and you're more open to exploring the darker parts of yourself, and being open about them."

and he's like "oh my god, that's SO true! I do a bunch of shadow work and love exploring the darkness in everything. wow, this is amazing. what does moon in taurus mean?!"

"so your moon sign is what influences your emotions and natural instincts. yours in taurus means that you tend to lean heavily on to the things that bring you comfort. so, eating the same things and wearing the same clothes, things that are familiar to you."

"...this is NUTS. how do the planets know?!"

you'd laugh. "babe, the planets MADE you this way."

[clementines-writing-corner]

organizing thoughts + setting microgoals (ya know productive people things)

Hello friends!

Happy 2024!!

It seems like my winter break has just flown by and tomorrow my university’s spring semester starts. I haven’t had as much time to work on my story as I would have liked, but I do feel rested after this break, which is always a good thing! ᕱ__ᕱ Despite not a lot of visible progress in my original story, there have been a few things I have been thinking about and attempting to iron out in my brain which I can update you on this week.

World-Building

Before I get anywhere else and make real progress in the plot of my story, I have come to the conclusion that I need to spend some time on worldbuilding. I knew the funky little magic world and my funky little fantasy story is taking place in needed some serious work before I started writing anything, but it’s come to my attention that it needs that work now, before I continue to develop anything else. Which… sucks.

Not that I am not going to enjoy creating my own fictional world but it's going to take A LOT of work before I see real progress and I am going to have to complete that work in very small increments because I have other Important Things™ I need to be doing. Like school. Ugh!

I am very notoriously bad with time management (which is something I’m working on in therapy actually - shout out once again to my therapist who is literally a God-send), so I think my goal for next week will be to create an outline/schedule/list for what I need to get done in the realm of world-building so that I can organize my thoughts a little better and have something tangible to work on. I’ll share it here next week if I have managed to make progress on it. One of the big things I know will absolutely be making it on that list first thing, however, is developing my magic system.

Magic System

As I have mentioned briefly in a previous post, janky magic systems with little-no rules are a huge pet peeve of mine when it comes to fantasy fiction (unless it makes sense within the story, which is rare). So, I know that crafting my own magic system will take me some time because I want it to make sense, be clear, and have outline rules and limitations. 

Another thing that's important to me is that any magic system I create/include in my story, is in accordance with my own personal religious beliefs. NOW HEAR ME OUT IN THE ENTIRETY BEFORE Y’ALL GO JUDGING ME, OKAY?! I am a Christian, so nothing aligning with demons, Satan, or the occult will be happening in my story (on the side of “Good” that is). It may seem like a small or silly thing to some but it’s 100% a priority to me. However, I want to write a fantasy novel that is accessible to ALL, not just my fellow Christians, and one that doesn’t feel preachy or anything of that nature. I’m not trying to push my beliefs onto my readers. I just don’t want to compromise them in my writing. 

This is an interesting article on writing magic systems into Christian fantasy that I have been looking over the past few days if any of y'all are interested in what my magic system may look like. 

Stereotypes

I also don’t want to accidentally write any story of -isms or -phobias into my novel and I know a surprising amount of magical beings and tropes fall into the “developed from a racial stereotype” category (just look up J.K. Rowling, goblins, and Jewish stereotypes if you don’t believe me). So, I wanted to create my own magical beings without the baggage. If, in the following posts, y’all see anything that could be rude or prejudice developing as I continue to grow my story please just let me know. It’s never my intention to cause harm. As I said, I want my story to be accessible for ALL. ᕱ__ᕱ 

~*~*~

That’s pretty much it! That’s what I’ve been turning over in my head and working on in the past few weeks while in the midst of family and friends and the chaos of the holiday season. I hope to get something more substantial to give to y’all next week, but for now I’ll let you go. For my fellow students returning to school, good luck in this new semester! ᕱ__ᕱ 

And always remember, dot your j’s and cross your t’s!

 ~Clementine J. Quincey 🪷

PS. I also finally taught myself how to crochet something and spent 3 days working on a flower garland for the canopy above my bed. It is quite cute and I feel very accomplished!!

[jimmygibbsjrrr]

What are your favorite voice lines for each survivor and why? (for example, I die when Nick says "you are the first three people in the world I have ever trusted")

I think I have one for everyone (or at least, one picked outta a few favourites) but I really struggled for a coupla them lol

I know and love a lot of these lines because I play on a lovely modded server where a lot of people use voice mods, and I've heard a lot of these lines from the players there, so if they seem random or you've never heard them before that's why! a lot of em are one-off saferoom lines, or dialogue dependent on doing something specific with a certain character. that's also why I seem to gravitate towards the funny one-liners, but there's some more serious/story-related ones here too

also this post ended up being so fucking long! sorry about that! I put a cut in the middle so it's easier to scroll past

Louis:

Louis: "But you know, as long as I have a Molotov I can make a firewall! Get it Francis? A firewall?"

Louis is my favourite and he's got so many banging lines so you'd think this one would be hard for me to choose, but I had to go with this one! the line's originally from The Sacrifice but it's a favourite for Louis players with voice mods. thanks to that, I've got a lotta good memories associated with it from that modded server I talked about. first time I heard it I genuinely laughed because the punchline being that funny caught me off guard. the joke is adorable, very fitting for his character, and the reactions are priceless:

Zoey: "Oh, boooo." Francis: "You're such a nerd."

honourable mention to any conversation about Bill being old because that shit's funny every time

Francis:

Francis: "Groovy." Louis/Zoey: [Short laugh] Francis: "What's so funny? It is groovy."

alternatively:

Francis: "Groovy." Zoey: "[Imitating] Groovy." Francis: "A-FRICKIN'-men."

honestly could have picked any line for Francis because he's so funny but this one is the one that makes me laugh most consistently. that's. that's it really. I just think it's funny. he says this when he picks up an auto shotgun

honourable mention to when he thinks Riverside is in Canada, and any line where he calls Louis 'Louie' because I'm a Frouis shipper and I read into that as a cute endearing nickname :)

Zoey:

Zoey: "Sorry. I can't lower the bridge." Nick: "That's terrific, cupcake. Look, is there a man up there we can talk to?" Zoey: "Oh, boo-hoo, I don't know what to do. Go to hell, Colonel Sanders!"

most of Zoey's funny lines are parts of other running jokes, references that I don't get or very tied to the context of the campaign, so it was actually kinda hard to pick one. I love all of her lines as well which didn't make it easier. but this one has stuck out to me since I first played The Passing because it's brilliant. Nick deserves every scathing insult he gets in that campaign <3

honourable mention to basically all her other lines. especially the ones in The Sacrifice because they cut DEEP her voice actress really went for it christ it hurts

DIShonourable mention to her death scream it's so goddamn LONG and the many hours I've sunk into Tank Challenge have left me hating it with a passion, stop screaming at me I'm doing my best

Bill:

Zoey: "You think one day it's all just gonna go back to normal?" Bill: "I'll see peace back on earth if I gotta murder every one of these bastards with my bare goddamn hands."

I think this line is just a great example of Bill's character really, and actually prompts an interesting train of thought as to how his hopes for the future shifted from No Mercy to The Sacrifice; originally, they seemed much more aligned with Zoey's, possibly part of the reason she felt so betrayed later. also it just sounds cool. it's from the hospital elevator in No Mercy.

honourable mention to this cut line of Bill pickin up an incapped survivor because I think it's really sweet:

Bill: "Bein' brave doesn't mean you're not scared. It means you're scared as hell, and then you pick up the shotgun anyway."

Left 4 Dead 2 survivors under the cut:

Ellis:

Ellis: "If the laws of nature would allow it, I would bear that man's children."

it really couldn't be anything else. I mean, it could, because everything that comes outta this guy's mouth is funny, but I cannot believe this line is real. I love it. as y'all probably know this one's from Dead Center.

honourable mention to every Keith story, and all of his 'Taunt' and 'Argh' lines from the voicewheel. seriously my favourite part of this character is his lines we could be here all day.

Nick:

Nick: "I am breathing shit air into my lungs. It is being absorbed into my bloodstream. I am literally full of shit."

does this make me immature? perhaps. again, I really struggled to pick for Nick, but like many others on the list my reasoning is just that I find this one funny. he sounds so disgusted.

honourable mention to all of his whining about his suit, mostly because the others' responses are golden. and obviously his swearing. because again, I'm immature.

Rochelle:

Rochelle: "Axe me a question, I dare you."

I have such a weakness for bad jokes. first Louis's firewall joke, now this. it's just the way she says it I think. wow my sense of humour is fucked. this one's a possible voice line for when Rochelle picks up a fire axe

honourable mention to all of the funny things she says when she's on low HP, and "Dibbs on Gibbs!" when she sees an infected Jimmy Gibbs Jr.

Coach:

Coach: "I find a Burger Tank in this place? I'm-a be a one-man cheeseburger apocalypse." Ellis: "Well, Coach? I aim to let you."

I hear this line every time I play Dark Carnival - which, considering how much the playerbase loves Dark Carnival, is a lot - and it just makes me smile, especially since they re-added the previously cut line from Ellis in The Last Stand update. also, it reminds me of my first introduction to the L4D2 characters, "Steamed Hams but it's Coach and Nick", which is a masterpiece of video.

honourable mention to his opening line from the trailer, which sets the tone and introduces the character brilliantly, and would have been a great first introduction if my real first introduction hadn't been a Steamed Hams meme.

this post took a surprising amount of time and effort. holy shit. you're welcome ig lmao

[buckyismybicycle]

"Buck Moon" (Bucky x Reader - Teenage Neighbours AU)

Buck Moon is tomorrow (Saturday, July 24th)! It will be a full moon (and orange!). Why Buck Moon? It's named in the almanac "buck moon" by Native American Algonquin tribes (since this is around the time male deer antlers are full-grown). You can read more about it here at NASA where they will do a better job explaining. I'm just here to write y'all a fic about it.

Title: Buck Moon (you are the moon of my life) Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader Rating: Teen+ Tags/Warnings: Reader's parents are deceased, first kiss, fluff, emotional hurt/comfort, mutual pining Summary: Bucky, your neighbour, catches you stargazing and sneaks out one night to watch with you. AO3 Link

Tonight, just like every other night, you crack open your window and pop the screen off, setting it aside. Feet first, you step out on the shingles and drag your blanket behind you to set up your little spot on the roof and close the window behind you. There was something serene about watching the night sky, when the town was asleep and the moon was shining brightly above you.

You had so many memories that involved the stars in the sky - your first camping trip with your dad, singing Wish Upon a Star with your mother whilst watching Pinocchio, the glow in the dark stickers that you had in your childhood bedroom (some of which are still on the ceiling). Each night you sat on the roof brought all these memories back for you, comforting you before you sleep. In fact, you're so concentrated on the sky above, that you never catch the curious stares of your neighbour, who often sits on his backyard porch, who often also looks up with admiration - just not at the stars.

---

Today was particularly rough - something just wasn't aligned for you. You had missed your bus and ended up being late to your first class, forgot your lunch, and then totally bombed your volleyball game, the first loss of the year. It was days like this that you wished you had your parents here, even though you loved living with your grandma. Sometimes, the world just felt unfair and since you never wanted to come off as ungrateful, you held it all in until it was just you and the open night sky. You slip out onto the roof, tugging your blanket behind you and settle into your spot. The tears had been threatening to spill all day, so it finally felt good to let them out, trying to stifle them so as to not wake anyone up.

You nearly screamed when a head popped up on the side of your roof before you realized it was just Bucky, your neighbour that you'd had a crush on since forever.

"Bucky?" You ask, wiping your tears away so he didn't see. "What are you doing?"

"Well, I'm trying to get onto this roof," Bucky answers simply before his head disappears and you see just the tips of his fingers on the ledge, shuffling over. He eventually gets his forearm braced, then a foot, then a leg. You were stunned into stillness as he finally rolls onto your roof and exaggeratedly lays on his back with a small "phwew".

"Um?"

He turns his head to look at you and then picks himself up with a smile, crawling the last few feet to sit beside you.

"What happened?" He asks.

"Nothing," you reply automatically.

"You don't just cry over nothing, c'mon [y/n], you can tell me."

You've been neighbours since you were both kids, played together, went to the same schools. You'd grown apart in high school, which you didn't feel bitter about or anything, it was natural. He was the school's basketball star, you had your volleyball, and he joined the student council while you signed up for the yearbook committee. Your schedules never matched anymore, and his friends from the basketball team would pick him up for school while you took the bus. But it didn't mean you weren't sad. Ever since you could remember, he had been the Sun, bright eyes and shining smile, and you had merely orbited around him.

"Just had a bad day," you finally settle on. Maybe you hadn't done a good enough job of keeping quiet, or you weren't hiding your emotions well enough. Bucky was quiet for a moment, but he wrapped an arm around you and pulled you in for a hug. You flushed at the sudden contact, how warm his body was pressed against your side, and how much a simple act like this would send you into tears again.

"M'sorry, doll," he murmurs into your hair as you cry silently into his shirt - for all the bad days you've had, all the times you bit back your sadness to plaster a fake smile on your face, everything came pouring out. Bucky rubbed circles into your shoulder and kept encouraging you to cry, let it all out, which of course made you cry more. It felt like hours had gone by before you found your voice again.

"Thanks," you rasp, throat dry. "Sorry."

"Don't be sorry," he tells you. "C'mon, tell me what I can do to make you feel better?" You just chuckle, because the Bucky now was the same Bucky when you were 5 years old - always wanting to help, always smiling and wanting to put a smile on others.

"I think I'm alright now," you sniffle. It did feel cathartic to have finally let it out, your limbs loose without the usual tension, even if your head felt a little stuffy. "I guess I just needed a good cry."

He didn't move his arm, and you didn't move away. You just wanted to feel safe and warm, for a bit longer.

"I miss you, [y/n]," he finally says. "I don't know when we drifted apart, but I hate it."

"I miss you too," you admit. "We just... do different things now. Have different friends."

"You're still my best friend, you know that right?" He looks down at you and - well, no, you didn't. He was one of the golden boys at school, he had plenty of friends these days.

"Really?"

"Yeah, really," he grumbles, annoyed that you don't believe him. He even flicks your arm lightly. You don't know if Bucky is just saying it to make you feel better, but it does help nonetheless.

"You're still mine too."

The silence isn't uncomfortable, you're both watching the twinkling stars above, and you even offer him some of the blanket to wrap around his shoulders. It feels nice. Then, he starts to sing, low and soft.

When you wish upon a star Makes no difference who you are Anything your heart desires Will come to you

If your heart is in your dream, No request is too extreme When you wish upon a star As dreamers do

Your eyes sting a little but you don't think your body is capable of producing any more tears, so with a wobbly voice, you join him for the next part.

Fate is kind She brings to those who love The sweet fulfillment of Their secret longing...

Like a bolt out of the blue, Fate steps in and sees you through... When you wish upon a star, Your dreams... come... true!

A bubble of joyous laughter emerges, remembering how many times Bucky watched this movie with you when you were younger, and the both of you yelling the words at the top of your lungs, completely off-key.

"Thanks, Buck." Seeing you smile again made Bucky's heart flutter - this is how you were meant to look to him, cheerful and happy.

"Have you ever wished upon a star?" His head tilts to look at you curiously.

You nod, a little embarrassed. It was probably cute when you were seven, but you were seventeen now. I wished that I we could go back to how things were - when I was happy, when mom and dad were still here, when you and I were closer, I wished we could be more.

"I know you can't tell me what you wished for," Bucky interrupts your thoughts. "But whatever you wished for, I hope it comes true for you." You have to bit your tongue from saying anything that would give you away. Instead, you tell him about the full moon tomorrow.

"They named a moon after me," Bucky waggles his eyebrows, which makes you roll your eyes fondly.

"You keep believing that."

"Nah, I'm jus' teasing. I know it's because the bucks got their antlers full grown before they lose 'em again." You were surprised he knew that, and told him so.

"You watch the stars every night," Bucky states matter-of-factly. "Had to come with something to impress you." Your cheeks warm, but you know it didn't mean anything. Bucky was a notorious smooth-talker, he probably doesn't even register half of what he's saying and the effect it has on you.

"It's just so..." You don't really have the words to describe the feeling, but you try. "There's a whole galaxy out there, billions of stars that shine. Like the night sky's freckles. It's the most beautiful thing in the world."

"Not quite," Bucky mumbles, and when you turn to ask him what he means, your breath catches when you see him staring at you, the look on his face of open adoration. His eyes are shining brilliantly in the moonlight, the grey-blue that you've memorized looking right at you, like you were the stars. It's the same look you've had for him for years.

"Buck?" You tremble under the weight of his moment. And like a comet blazing its way toward you, he leans in closer and closer while your heart starts to race.

He kisses you slowly, lips slotting in just right against yours and your body lights up like the sky above. It's sweet, and he pulls back to see the dusting of pink across your cheeks, your eyes full of love and wonder. For him. You rest your foreheads together, a pair of matching shy smiles on your faces.

"Don't yell at me, but I'm going to tell you what I wish upon stars for," he whispers. "I've always wished for you. I wished for you to love me back, but that was selfish so then I wished for you to be happy. And every time you got sad or upset, I'd wish for the stars to grant you whatever you wished for."

His admission hits you like an asteroid, and you tear up again, damn him!

"Bucky," your voice as shaky as your hands when you reach to cup his face in your palms. "I've loved you since we were kids."

"So have I." This time, when he kisses you, he wraps his arms around you and brings you into his lap, holding you close. It's everything you ever dreamed of, and you don't know why the two of you waited so long - how you two could be so blind. You feel his tongue against your lips, shy and asking for permission. You've never been good at saying no to Bucky, and you certainly weren't about to start now. He feels perfect underneath you, his arms holding you steady, grounding you.

"I love you, [y/n]."

"I love you too, buck moon." Taglist: @anonnygon

[jean-does-not-have-a-horseface]

Wildflower

Yooooo impromptu nsfw fic!? On this fine evening!? As if you don't know me! Y'all want soft wet Eren and I deliver.

Pairing: Eren/ Reader

Summary: You and eren find yourselves tangled with each other after a swim in the lake, things take a much warmer turn from there.

Warnings: NSFW, 18+

The lake was beautiful at this time of the day.

A soft evening breeze blew the fresh smell of blooming wildflowers around. Mellow tints of camomile and lavender lingered in your nostrils, blended with water lillies and hibiscus struck you tenderly, brushing your senses beautifully. The forest green leaves around you shimmered an entirely different colors under the thousand golden rays of the blushing sun. Numerous duos of butterflies fflickered and flapped their wings on each other, twisting and turning in the air as they seemingly kissed, landing on perky petals and hoovering with each other under the tangerine light.

Yet here you were; drainched and shivering, laid on a thin sheet of clothe, cold as ever, but burning up from your core and outwards.

"Eren"

The whisper of his name was silent, lost in the heart of the forest, overlapped by the sounds of nature as the sun was shyly hiding underneath the horizon. Still it reached his ears and his ears only, just like he thristed for.

He too was shivering and very pale and as sweat begged to drip from the pores of his skin, it merged with the flowing water that the two of you had been bathing in only moments ago.

His lips were sucking yours in with need, worrying your flesh with arrogance before his time guess dared to dip in the crevices of your mouth. His palms were always supporting, always cupping your face to sink his head closer into you. His tongue rubbed yours with twirling motions, dipping and swiping in any place he could manage to drag it on.

"You have such a lovely voice."

"I do?"

"You do" Eren said. "You're making my -ah- my heart melt."

Turquoise orbs locked with yours, his sharp nose brushed over the tip of yours, his hand coming to cup tenderly just the underside of your jaw line. The cold, wet fabric of his shirt brushed over your naked skin, hanging so low that when you'd stick your forehead to his collar bone you could see the view of his hips as they remained frozen and in collision with yours.

"Eren, please, please move."

"Shh." His lips brushed over yours with animalistic need, but he never placed a kiss on you. "I just want to stay like this for a while, to look at you, you're so beautiful under this light."

With a sharp breath creating commotion on your side you felt like your lungs were spent. His plum lower lip sank under his teeth as he looked at you, his eyebrows furrowing together and away from his eyelids in what seemed like utter, horrible pain.

Maybe it was painful. No, it definitely was painful. The fact that he wouldn't move inside you, the way your hardened buds brushed with his shirt. The sly adoration that glimmered in his gentle turquoise eyes. We're you ever in a position to chose a single memory to keep of his it would be this very moment.

That was if he would let you think clear.

With one thumb flicking over your most sensitive bundle of nerves occasionally and the squirm inside the depths of your chest, you instinctively brought your hands to cup his own face eager to clash his lips against yours. Your hips finally made a movement of their own accord; you bucked forward and into the small surface of the tip of his finger, searching desperately for some rythimc friction.

You found yourself pushing against him hard and fast, so much that the evening breeze was finally starting to become evident, forming little bumps on the surface of your wet skin. Another short lived shiver ravaged your body and you gasped, you forehead linked with his collar bone. Before your eyes, you could see his hand hiding just between your legs, rubbing just on the spot you wanted, and it only added to your lust.

With a hitched breath, you let out a soft mewl and earned one from the brunet in response.

"Fuck!" Eren snarled and his hand came to dig absurdly on the ground next to you.

With the twirling of his hips inside you, he bucked slightly before he hoisted him self out of you and aligned the tip of his length with your entrance, sliding it teasingly over you.

"I love you." He said and clashed his forehead with the prominent tip of your jaw.

Your heart throbbed the instant he uttered the words yet he de ied you the chance to look him in the eye. Whether from embarrassment or shame, whether because the little scarlet tint on his cheeks was something he was insecure about, he took away from you the right of being able to lock your gaze with his. And somewhere between not being able to look into his eyes and being teased by his slow rhythm against you, you felt lost and swallowed by the words you wanted to speak back to him.

Perhaps he knew your answer. That he could probably be why he didn't demand it.

Still, your heart slightly ached at the slight melancholy of his tone.

You were being swallowed as a whole by the slow dragging of his member across you, by the way that you could see he held him self just below his fleshy tip to take a lead and establish his self control. He didn't want to thrust inside you and establish a pace, he was making that obvious. The pained expression in his face was more likely due to that, the paleness of his skin gave him away.

"Don't you love me?"

It came out like a cry, a whine, like a little brawl of a hurt puppy and it hit hit you like a monstrus tide. Had Eren always been able of making such lewd sounds?

"Of course i- of course I do." You stuttered, the throbbing heat that thrilled your abdomen fueling by your confession.

You could only sense how much he was enjoying it; the hiccuped breaths he let out, the tight clentching of his abdomen muscles, the veins in his hands that flexed as he pressed into the abnormal soil with the fact of his palm, the stray strands of wet hair that shimered im tiny droplets at their base as they flickered on your skin, it all added to that.

"I feel so dirty." He whispered and you knew to what he was reffering.

"But you're not."

"That's exactly how I feel though."

"Not for me, you're not what everyone paint you to be."

"Then promise me you'll hold my hand." He growled. "That you won't leave my side with what's to come."

Right after hot slowly dragged his teeth the the length of your jaw, his breath was on your ear, hot against your skin despite the cold evening air. The hiffs of his nose shot like steam over the crook of your neck and unbeknownst to you they preppee the area for what was to come.

"I promise."

Eren's lips attacked you, the launched over the tender skin of your neck, the hot torture of his tongue and teeth beginning a sweet massacre against all the little sweet spots he knew you had. You only pressed your head against the sheet of cloth harder, accepting the little defeat of your own personal ego. You were glad you didn't have to worry about being audible into the heart of the woods.

Your body was jolting against his touch, your pelvis, sore and needy in its movements slowly gave in the the build up in the aftermath or Eren's teasing. A hand came to grip on Eren's flexed bicep, your fingertips digging painfully into his skin everytime the feeling became unbearable for you to handle. You were going numb, painfully numb but you seemed to savor your release for later, you repeatedly told yourself that you could do it.

The little drizzling of cicadas had started spreading throughout the air by now, from the corner of your strained eye you could see some of them flying around, some birds chirping and flying inside their little nests as the last specs of sunlight peaked right between the enormous trees. Nature was celebrating another endearing late spring sunset and here you were, feeling the dear melancholy of a delayed edge.

It was only when Eren shifted his weight onto you that you immediately run your hands through his hair, throwing a chocolate lock away from his tired eyes just to finally get the chance to look at him. This time it was you who took so long tracing his jawline, it was you you placed chaste kissed across his face, chin, the corners of his so well outlined lips.

"Eren, I love you no matter what," You whispree, eyes closed as your heart hammered in your chest. "you don't have to hold back with me."

Whether he did it because you genuinely convinced him of your words or because he wanted to get this over with, you didn't know. All that you knew what that your legs were forced over his shoulders, and that his hand was cupping your cheek with force, desperately clutching on you as he finally slammed his throbbing member inside of you.

Puckered lips and glistering skin, angry brows and a menacing look, it all added to the occasional gulp he'd force upon himself, it all took away from the moans he failed to let out. The little grunts he left were due time the brutality of his rhythm and they were so unique but still overlapped by the sound of skin clapping and clashing.

You only gave a little moan and surrendered to the feeling, your coiling stomach refusing to allow you to hold your orgasm in for any longer. Your legs went still, your toes curled and flexed and your walls clenched around him. You let out a panting mewl as you felt your whole body giving into the immediate trance of afterglow.

Eren only grunted at the feeling, thrusting himself faster into you before barely managing to pull out, a hand coming to his length to guide the spurting white rope that emitted from the tip anywhere away from you.

"I'm so sorry" He panted, and finally his head nuzzled to the crook of your neck almost painfully.

"I got you Eren. You don't have to have a single worry in the world at the moment."

And he truly wished he didn't

[ivesambrose]

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

As promised, a late Christmas but early new year gift from my side. 💚

Choose the screen you feel strikes a memory from your childhood or your dreams or something that's been on your mind lately xo

To book a personal reading with me DM or email me at jovescorpioreadings@gmail.com

1.

Life hasn't been as harmonious due to the obvious circumstances have made you feel that this is your new reality now. Finding a new normal in where you've always been. But that's far from the truth.

Maybe you have strayed from something you had faith in, but in 2021 its time to get back in touch with that again. But I'm not seeing blind faith here, there's a sense of clarity. One you didn't have before and caused you foggines. I literally see a thick fog. You're going to have a chance to live what you've missed out on the year before.

There will be a boost in self esteem as well as desire to focus on focus on the sweetness moments in life has to offer. It's almost as though you're bored of the news, bored of the bitterness and being concerned. So to put it in simpler terms, your attitude has become rather Yolo.

I see some of you building immunity, focusing on what you eat, maybe even taking supplements for health. I literally see someone weight lifting this could be as literal as building strength / muscle. Good for you!

The start of the year it seems an idea will take a tangible form. I see some of you committed to learning something new or working on something that you would like to put out the public. I see someone devoted to some form of expression honestly.

It's also advised to protect your energy not everyone is going to be happy with your goals and plans.

You'll also be able to see beyond current circumstances. So long term plans will be the focus as well as a general attitude of, "I don't care anymore, I'm gonna do what it takes eitherway."

I also see you learning more about finances, savings, investments etc

There will be opportunities to travel or what was once halted will pick up.

Aquarius and virgo season are significant.

Some keys themes are,

- knowing when to leave a situation discreetly.

- again, know when to leave.

- recognizing opportunities and seizing them instead of awaiting validation or looking back at the ones that didn't bring you fulfillment.

2.

I feel you've been restless and anxious throughout the year so now that sudden patience and understanding hits you, you're unfamiliar with this feeling. The, "I don't have to worry anymore you mean? I don't have to wake up feeling not messed up? That's suspicious!"

I see some of you finding some comfort in walking while listening to music, picturing different scenarios etc. You could be walking indoors or outdoors, doesn't matter. All I know is that it'll ground you. I see you feeling a little more stable as though you can rely on yourself.

I see you attracting a lot of wealth honestly. Money is just energy, eitherway you'll attract it. I think you'll tap into that power honestly. You might even find yourself having purchased something you consider a luxury item sometime this year. Increase in wealth will also give you a boost in other areas of your life. You may also take a liking towards warmer colors. You may like gold over black combination a lot too.

I'm seeing you heal an old would. Wanting more adrenaline in your life too. Some of you may dance, take up dancing etc something that gets the blood pumping.

There's also a theme of getting in touch with the emotions you have often kicked under the rug or have shamed yourself for and left unexpressed.

Why do I sense a more feral energy in some of you? Like you've been quiet for so long and settled for things but deep inside you are a wild, wild thing.

A cycle of turmoil is complete, the person you were in jan 2020 and the one you are in Jan 2021 are extremely different people.

There's also a connection you have been dreaming of or getting signs of but you're fearing the worst it seems too? Don't worry about it too much,

Significant months are Aries and Leo season.

Key themes for this year,

- relocation

- long distance travel

- flexibility

- multiple jobs

- silently knowing you're the baddest bitch ever

3.

Calming of your nerves. No thought head empty. But in the best way possible since you've flushed out a lot of toxicity from your life. There's probably something you've incorporated maybe an affirmation, hobby, routine etc that you're going to be or are advised to be persistent about. Some of you may also be suffering from sleeplessness, nightmares, restlessness etc maybe even headaches, eye strain. You're truly advised to make your health well being your priority. Calming music, meditation, painting etc will help with this.

Your gift of visualization will be very useful for some reason.

You may have felt unrequited love in the past but this year brings about more synchronicity and balance. Its simply because you've chosen to bring the priority to you. So you won't be settling for less.

The biggest theme for you is breaking an ancestral pattern and shedding old skin. Don't be surprised if the whole year feels like a Pokémon evolution for you. It's high time to follow what you want instead of what others want for you.

I see some of you leaving a hostile/exhausting situation/residence to somewhere much calmer.

There's a key theme of rebirth and heeding the call of something you couldn't do earlier. Being more active in pursuit of your goals. I see you determined to do something for yourself.

I also see clarity of thought more assertiveness in your part and knowing when to command things into fruition.

Significant months are capricorn and taurus season. Even Gemini season.

Key themes for the year:

- don't blind yourself to the love you literally just manifested.

- it's okay to be selfish of your earned resources.

- as your shed your old skin, don't expect yourself to not have an upgrade.

- you indeed won and their gaslighting did not.

4.

You feel you have lost your shine it seems...

As though you don't have the gifts or the right amount of talent or perhaps you feel disconnected with the things that once made you happy.

2021 is all about finding that sparkle and dropping the heaviness one day at a time. It'll be a transformative period from feeling lack lustre to discovering a whole new array of things you feel connected to. A lot of awakened creativity without the fear of having to prove to others that, "Hey look, I did this thing please validate." no. Do this cuz you want to. Do this even if you think its bad. You have to be persistent and allow yourself to improve.

I see a lot of you channeling certain emotions into creative expression or achieving something. Also a lot of connecting with nature by yourself since you feel the need to maybe isolate a bit or disconnect from people who drain you off your energy.

You'll be reaping a lot of rewards for your earlier efforts as well as the efforts you're going to put in. I get a picture of a tree filled with apples, the tree certainly belongs to you and you have your sweet rewards with you. Your patience has paid off.

You may also be drawn to cool tones or cool colors. You'll also learn that you don't need to be right or perfect all the time. It's a growing stage and if you don't learn from your mistakes then what's the point. I just see this year as being you keeping your peace and not dwindling in others business anymore simply because you seek peace from extra drama. I also truly see you dropping the need to be right and being stubborn cuz that's been hindering you for the longest time. There are people although few seeking to guide and help but you may have been subconsciously rejecting it.

I also wouldn't be surprised if some of you break up with current partners or a friend group to go different ways. You've been straying form things and not really growing. This year might be full of a lot of self awareness for you.

There's an opportunity that brings you emotional fulfillment of sorts too but you'll be lowkey about it. I also see you wanting to seek refuge from your own thoughts at one point. If you're an artist of any kind, this year is gonna be a benchmark for you. I can tell that. Perhaps admist this soul searching you'll find someone that aligns with you too. (this could be romantic or platonic)

Significant seasons are taurus and likely Leo season.

Main themes I'm seeing are that of,

- Finding people you feel at home with

- learning what you want to commit to before you decide in who.

- taking the risk to take certain journeys by yourself. You may think you're alone, but you'll meet souls just like you along the way.

- leave your comfort zone. Please.

5.

You're truly about the collect the biggest glow up award and I would like to congratulate you in advanced. That's it. That's the overview.

Okay I'm kidding ofc I'm not gonna leave you at just that.

Something that is long inevitable will happen. You have been waiting for this. It could be a travel plan that did not come through because of the previous year. But whatever it is that you're waiting for is making its way to you and not just that, you're making your way towards something or some place to.

You maybe going the distance for something that has a lot to do with your career as well.

You have finally unlocked a hidden fire within you (for real I see a scarlet red and a flame) that is just so stunning like?? Some of you might just embody this sexy siren energy. Do not be surprised if you attract people left, right and center this year. But then again I see y'all being invested in your passions and one of these passions is being your best like, there's just so much 7 rings by Ariana energy here what even? Please own it!

Expect love offers. Expect love to come in. Although I do hesitancy here since a lot of you just had this sudden glow and are simply maybe not used to tenderness, honesty and affection.

I also see leadership, management and business skills is something you will learn this year. Also expect hearing certain messages in conversations and music I feel a lot of you simply connect deeply with music or it's connected with your life path.

Key themes for the year,

- A long term romance coming in. This person is such a charm, I feel as though when you were busy tending to your goals and looking at how far you've come, they come in for you. You saw them coming but it still feels unexpected.

Significant seasons are, cancer, virgo and scorpio.

- money saved secretly. Patience and constant efforts bringing in monetary rewards.

- connecting with like minded people

- travel, skincare, health, aesthetics. 

- learning to be more graceful and composed

- slow progress is still progress. The most beneficial kind.

[bondsmagii]

Writing this mortifies me to no end, but I do genuinely think y'all are onto Something with the kink discussion. I grew up super sheltered and am naturally uncomfortable discussing sex and sexual topics with others (unless it's online anonymously and even then I shake in my boots). All my kinks are things I would never want to try irl with an actual person, and I generally can only tolerate them written or as thoughts, but not visually.

The concept is appealing to me, the core emotion of it, but the motions themselves are kinda meaningless. Idk if that's cause my relationship with sex is weird and distant but it's just like that for me. I can read about some weird shit like oviposition and be like "yeah that sounds interesting" but would never want that to happen to me irl. I think it's about abstraction, maybe. And in some situations, projecting your fear or anger into an object of desire, so you can cope with it. I don't fucking know. Compels me though.

it is very compelling. I do wonder if a lot of kinks are kind of aligned with... well, basically with why people like to watch horror movies or read fucked up books. it's something that's dangerous, and therefore inherently a little exciting, but the situations are definitely not something you'd ever want to experience or do in real life. you don't actually want to get tied up by somebody; you don't actually want to get eaten alive; you don't actually want to get filled with like... I don't even know, eggs or worms or whatever. but people are people, and something that humans have in abundance is curiosity.

I think for a lot of people, as well, danger is inherently tied up in sex. at a certain point, all of our biological reactions kind of start blurring the lines between themselves -- it's why people can get boners after a surge of adrenaline, for example. the body is a machine but it's also imperfect in its way; wires get crossed, and certain sensations can feel close to or even the same as others. (ever touched something so hot it feels honest to god cold, for example?) I think this danger and fear might blur the line or at least overwhelm the senses so much that for some people it feels much like -- or even is -- arousal, so it makes sense that they would then want to safely explore these things with the added benefit of some kind of conclusion or release at the end. a simultaneous experiment and possession of the thing they want to understand, perhaps?

I have no idea. I am not a very sexual person myself, and I don't experience any sexual desire at all, let alone reaching the point of kinks. this is just something I've wondered about, and I'm sure that psychologists much smarter than I have looked into this and come up with various theories, but I do wonder. I'm often of the opinion that a lot of strange or eccentric human behaviour can be explained away by the fact that as a species, we're just a bunch of nosy bastards who count "experimenting" as part of our natural behaviours.

[janethesiren]

revolutionary pals! 01 | yang jeongin

───pairing: jeongin x gn reader

───genre: fantasy, supernatural au

───warnings: cursing, description of death

───word count: 1,4k

hi y'all! this is just a test of what the series is gonna be so i'm not really sure about how it went. i hope i showed a bit of the pair's relationship, i will get more in detail in the upcoming chapters. let me know your thoughts! i have too many things to tell about these two lmao.

if so many years wandering around this earth has told you something, it was that this idea that movies put out there that the perfect time to combat crime is around midnight, when the shadows can conceal everything perfectly and help you out to hide from predators was absolute bullshit. you can’t see anything. lots of people are awake by that time in their homes and every crash or slap is gonna be heard from miles away and bring unnecessary attention to whatever ministration you could be doing at such unholy hours. 

however… the early hours in the morning seemed the perfect timing for it:around 6 am, subtle light that is adequate to let you see everything clearly without being too revealing, basic services are not working yet but there is some heavy machinery as trash trucks and cleaning devices functioning to conceal any sound. and let’s be clear here. villains don’t rise early.

villains, and jeongin.

“let them become extinct. that’s natural selection. why do we want such a powerful creature if it is in the verge of potentially dying all the time?” jeongin said, dragging his feet on the concrete while huffing out nonstop. at this point in history, you were used to deal with his exhausting behavior that showed up from time to time. he wasn’t the type to pick up on you to drive you crazy, he just would act disgusted by any from of affection and would scream his lungs out when excited. usually, jeongin was just sleepy around this hours, pretty much silent. just not a morning person, eyes puffy and hair diveleshed. but today, you don’t know if it was because of some type of aligning of the luminary or that he was slowly but surely morphing into a big-headed goat, that he was insufferable. like some puppet that could not stop talking.

“repeat that again, slowly” you said, bluntly.

once you arrived at the moss-covered mall, the way wasn’t so clear and you both had to deal with long and tall grass that stinged a little to the touch, making you both take long and high strides to try to step down on it and make it easier for you to move. without missing a chance to huff annoyingly, jeongin talks.

“they… are big… dangerous… but too dumb… to survive…” the rhythm of his words marked by heavy and muted stomps in the grass, his arms sprawled in a cross to help him out with balance. even though jeongin could be very astute and sharp at times, making him the perfect half for your team, he could be very literal about things too. 

“pup. you’re the dragon. you are a powerful creature in the verge of dying at all times.” you spoke stopping and turning your head to face him “and we don’t let you die at your own luck” 

for your enjoyment, the sleep struck jeongin was back and you were greeted by some comfortable silence as you restarted your march. at least for like, 45 seconds.

“but i’m not dumb” he murmured. “right?”

“i don’t pick up on my youngers”

“you don’t even know that. you don’t know which year or day you were born.” he stated getting ahead of you, hoping to walk on rough concrete soon.

“i just have a hunch” 

after some more huffs and whines from jeongin that earned him a couple encouraging pats in the back and some death glares after being too much, you both arrived to the epicentre of the shopping complex. a building with a considerable width and height to it, completely drowned by undergrowth. people didn’t use to go shopping anymore since a couple of decades back, everything delivered to the main door of every house for the comfort of the population. being immortal had its perks, such as seeing humanity evolve enough to transform every mobility device into a capability integrated in the own human, find a cure to most illnesses and make them pay ominous amounts of benefits for it. capitalism things you’ve witnessed since any other economic system had failed terribly millennium after millennium.

it didn’t take jeongin more than a minute to lose his shit over how cool it was to be back into one of these buildings after so much time, laughing and screaming around until you grabbed his arm to bring him into the broken escalator.

“listen here. we’re dealing with a brood of dragons, can you keep it down a bit?” you said shaking him a little.

“awh c’mon, aren’t you excited? don’t you want to get… i don’t know, a new outfit?” he said ironically right before faking to smell your stink, pushing you around trying to make you laugh. and even though he annoyed you, it made you laugh at the end. when was the last time that you both bought clothes without being observed as a complete freak by everyone surrounding you? or buying clothes, in general. you couldn’t even recall how old you were.

“i’m gonna act like i didn’t listen to the biggest stinky ass talk about my smell and continue” earning a pinch in your waist by your partner, you jolted and continued.

“i have to take it, you know how they get around electricity. the baby is gonna sense your energy and lose its shit” you spoke a little agitated as you were taking the hundreth step in the escalator while jeongin complained.

“you always take them! why can’t you let me do the cool stuff for once? i’ve woken up too early for this” he said scrunching his expression.

“cool stuff? what if it bites my head off, huh? believe me, i wish they weren’t scared of electricity so you could take it and stop whining, and because them breeding in the middle of nowhere is exhausting as fuck” you said kicking pebbles off another step, already mad that it was taking so long to get to the top.

“i can morph into, i don’t know, a fucking sunflower and trap it when the thing is distracted by your stunning beauty” he said gibbering with his voice to annoy you. even though there’s some truth in that, jeongin thought to himself. he wouldn’t recognize it in his whole lifetime, probably. tempting as it was to say it only to make you flush like a kid just for him to tease you endessly about it.

“jeongin, you’re really testing my limits right now-”

thank the gods above you were able to shut up in that exact moment. seeing a nest made of various metallic materials stolen from here and there, a tiny dragon rested in the middle, tender and fragile in comparison with its surroudings.

with the creature right in front of your eyes, both of you fell silent within a millisecond. not a single breath could be heard in the whole shopping complex and inevitably you gifted jeongin a quick gaze. he looked right back at you, his eyes shiny with excitement and lips pursed in a line, using every bit of strength to not coo at the sight before him. even when the whole humanity has spent decades combating in between themselves to get jeongin’s head, to study him and snatch every drop of his blood and try to earn his powers, you always thought that the most valuable thing of him was his capability of staying youthful and filled with excitement after so many years. the way his eyes shined in that moment reminded you of the times in which you would play in between the waters, him morphing with it and surrounding your whole body to tickle you holding you tight enough to not let you drown and slide along its surface. those, were the times where you’ve felt more alive: when jeongin was living as a kid, enjoying the childhood neither of you really had. 

snapping back to reality, the little dragon uncurled from his previous position, whole mass shuddering by the cold air and pupils shaking with fear at the sight of jeongin and you. it’s been alone for probably days now, you thought to yourself. lowering on your knees, you slowly approached to the creature hunching over yourself, seeing it jolt in it’s seat and start to emit stretching sounds like a puppy being tortured.

“hey, hey, it’s okay! no need to be scared” you whispered as your hand came forward on a cautionary way. opening your palm to cast a subtle light, an illusion was formed displaying some recognizable heat that the baby dragon was familiar with from it’s momma’s embrace. tiny flames started to ignite in it as the heat was turning into some sparkly fire, making the baby jolt forward into your arms to find some comfort.

again, both of you were breathless, you could feel jeongin’s tension and breath hitch from the distance that was between you two. the sight almost brought tears to your eyes: another indefense creature left alone with too much power, but vulnerable in all it’s glory at the same time. it almost seems too familiar, for your liking.

slowly, a hand creeps it’s fingers in between the roots of your hair at it’s top, scratching your scalp in a comfortable manner. looking up, you found jeongin with a soft smile plastered on his face.

“good job, cub” he spoke softly, his bangs crossing upon his eyebrows and eyes a little. the baby in your arms creeps higher, tangling it’s limbs onto your torso, head falling in the crook of your neck and tail surrounding your waist’s circumference. with your nails scratching it’s scales, you slowly return from your hunched position to walk your way back towards the escalator.

“let’s go now”

as you reach the end of the escalator, you can sense some type of presence around. stopping your steps to a halt you make jeongin’s chest barge into your back, your pointing finger rising next to your face to hush him before he speaks. you can’t see anyone around, but the weight under your feet feels different, some sort of tension growing beneath them.

inevitably, you weren’t wrong. even when you love to feed your ego from your wins by scrubing it on jeongin’s face, in times like this you wish that you were wrong for fucking once.

“would you believe your eyes… it seems like we’re gonna be back with double price!” 

the raspy voice of the corpulent men in front of you made you stay still. two hunters, electric web in hand, were probably aware of the existence of the nest. something in your gut was telling you they were the ones who hunted the momma in the first place. you didn’t feel the warmth of jeongin’s chest in your back anymore, and you weren’t sure if you were relieved because for some reason it was bothering you more than it should’ve, or completely desperate because that meant that he was moving around. and that was putting him in danger just by the sake of his existence. you shouldn’t move either: the hunters were too close to try to make any sudden move, and every piece of furniture that you could throw their way was trapped under years and years of vegetation that was tying it to the ground. not enough time fot it to break in such a long distance. 

“i wouldn’t try that” you said, voice sure and firm. 

“oh yeah?” one of them said “we know who you are. your head is valuable, but without your little companion you’re not very useful right now” the deep and annoying laugh resonated in the walls of the mall, his mate reciprocating it while you were completely frozen in your spot. where the fuck is jeongin right now. the  baby dragon started to shuffle in your arms, the electrified weapon making him lose its stability and seeing it trash in your arms made the hunters scrunch in laughter even more, holding their stomachs. however, soon enough they slowly but surely stopped their movements and laughter, stiffening while looking right behind your body. 

without missing a beat, you hear a loud struendous growl, followed by big ass fire showering everywhere in front of you. scrunching over yourself while the baby dugged its claws into the flesh of your shoulders, you could hear the agonic screaming of the hunters being burned to death. seconds later as the smoke dissipated, you saw the bodies reduced to masses and ashes in front of you. you turned slowly, being faced by an enormous and completely scary-enough-to-make-you-shit-your-pants dragon. 

with unmistakable foxy eyes, shining as two suns that were filled with worry and care, looking down at you.

“jeongin, if you ever scare me like that to pull a male savior stunt like this again, i swear to god i’ll-”

[tasmanianstripes]

/rp

Listen, I know y'all expected Tommy to break down in tears once he left the cell and run to Sam and hug him, and just generally that kind of shit, but like...PTSD doesn't work that way?

Some people's PTSD might, but you need to realise that everybody responds to trauma and triggers differently. Some people might cry and hyperventilate, some people might get angry or even get aggressive and lash out at people. From previous PTSD episodes of Tommy, it was kind of clear that he wouldn't be the crying breakdown kind of guy.

The reason Tommy acted like he did to c!Sam is because of his PTSD, not out of malice, and honestly? I don't blame him for blaming Sam. He felt hurt and just left a situation that severely traumatised him, he thought he could trust Sam and that he'd protect him, and from Tommy's perspective that trust was broken. He's not exactly wrong either.

Now, I don't blame Sam completely, mistakes happen and it's incredibly clear that he feels horribly guilty over what happened. We saw Sam blaming himself and hurting after Tommy's death, but Tommy didn't. We have the full picture, Tommy doesn't.

He's right to feel hurt and even lash out and blame Sam for what happened, and although I personally think he isn't 100% morally right in blaming Sam (it wasn't fully Sam's fault but let's be honest, the prison needs reforms) it is a completely natural and expected way for a teenager to act like after just getting out of an incredibly traumatising experience. Tommy isn't going to think clearly, he isn't going to stop and consider what Sam might have felt or think, his only goal at the time is to get the hell out of the prison - the place he associates his trauma with.

I'm just begging y'all to look at Tommy's POV, try to put yourself in his shoes, and stop demonising people with PTSD the second they show any kind of symptoms that don't align with how you perceive a "good" trauma victim to behave like.

(This isn't c!Sam critical or trying to bash artists and writers that depicted Tommy crying and hugging Sam when reuniting with him (I like Sam a lot and this kind of content is good shit 👌), it's more critical of the dsmp fans who shit on c!Tommy the second he looks at some other character a bit funny or breaths in the wrong direction)

[libsterslobsters]

The Wanton Song

Summary: How do you broach the topic of sex with the 90-something super soldier you've found yourself dating? That's the reader's question. Luckily, she and Bucky are no strangers to awkward conversations...

Pairings: Bucky Barnes x fem!enhanced! Reader

(Reader can see bits and pieces of the future in visions and understands all languages)

Warnings: SMUT, tiny bit of angst, lotsa fluff, maybe some past dub!con if you squint

Author's note: Wow... here I am posting smut on the internet. Never thought that would happen. Tmi, but I'm married, so I have a good amount of sex 🙀 and I actually had a great first time, but some people don't, and that's what I tried to represent. That, and CONSENT!!!! Consent is sexy, y'all. Safe, sane and consensual all day every day.

As always, the reader's name isn't stated so that you can read as a self insert, but I've written so much at this point that I refer to the Reader as Violet in my own mind.

*************************************************

 Life has been going swimmingly these past few months. Better than ever before in fact, or at the very least, better than in a long time. She’s still a fugitive, living life looking over her shoulder, but now she has a steady job, a steady paycheck, and oh yeah, a steady boyfriend. Those three things have never aligned for her before (especially the last one). Overall, she’s pretty happy. But, because she’s her, there’s still a question niggling at the back of her mind.

 The transition from “you’re my only friend” to “we’re together now” went smoothly, helped in part by the fact that Barnes had been at that particular juncture the whole time. From the outside looking in, the only major changes have been the addition of those three simple but very key words and an upping the anti in the cuddles department.

 Speaking of cuddles, that’s a very mild term for what’s going on these days. It starts out innocent enough. The usual location is on the couch at one or the other’s apartment. There hadn’t been much distance between them since that first time where they ended up talking more than watching the movie playing from her laptop, but now, the space is nonexistent. As a general rule, within the first ten minutes, her legs somehow end up over his lap or in some way intertwined with is. The intention is always to pay attention to what’s on the screen but, well, when you’re that close, it would be rude not to snuggle up. And, when the other person looks that damn kissable, it would truly be insulting not to take the plunge.

 Now, considering the angle, one of them has to lean in. Otherwise, it would be awkward. That generally determines who, somewhere from two to ten minutes later, is on top of who. Of course hands wander, and even though it’s understood that the word “no” can be employed at any time and immediately obeyed (not to mention the copious amounts of “Is this okay”’s being asked), she can’t remember a time either of them have said it.

 If she had to attach a term to what comes next, it would be ‘dry humping.’ And then… nothing. It always ends far too soon, leaving her flustered and with her heart racing. At first she thought it was because he simply didn’t want her, but, well, there’s certain physical signs that point to that not being the problem. Her next guess was that he’s simply being respectful. Well, as sweet as that is, she’s ready to get on with it. She’s only human after all, and as such, has needs. Sure, she could take care of them herself, but if she had to guess, he’s experiencing those needs too, and from what she’s heard, it’s more fun to take care of it together.

 The only issue: how the hell do you bring something like this up, especially when the person you’re bringing it up with grew up in a much more repressed era than you did? She’s been debating it for the past week, and despite having multiple visions, none of them have given her that key insight into what to do.

 Finally, she decides to just say it. They’ve made a point to be honest with each other, and it’s probably best to get it out of the way. They’re adults, after all. They can have this discussion. She’s going to come straight out with it.

 “Hey, can I ask you something? It’s kind of personal, and maybe a little uncomfortable.”

 “Sure, Doll.” The response is immediate. “Fire away.”

 Glancing up to make sure they’re not at a pivotal scene in tonight’s movie (they have a system; at his place, watch something he grew up with, at hers, something made literally anytime after 1945), she spits out the whole sentence in one breathless go. “Are we ever going to have sex?”

 It feels like a branding iron where his arm is still wrapped around her shoulder. Still, it’s comforting. At least he’s not moving away.

 “I gotta admit, that’s not the question I was expecting. What brought this on?”

 She shrugs, carefully keeping her eyes trained on the wall behind his head instead of on him.

 “Nothing in particular. Just…” is there a delicate way to put this? “...I think things are going well between us, and sometimes when we’re together… I’ve noticed that there’s a physical response.” She’s really hoping that’ll suffice, because she can’t think of a good way to say “I can feel that you’re hard when you’re on top of me”.

 “Oh.”

 Apparently, her meaning is indeed clear enough, because he removes his arm from her shoulders. She’s about to apologize (all the while mentally berating herself) when his hand closes over hers.

 “I’m sorry about that, Doll. I’ll try to stay calmer.” Wait, that’s not- “It’s just an issue guys have. Don’t think it means you have to do anything that you don’t want to, because I would never-”

 “I know you wouldn’t.” Without thinking, she cuts him off. “And I want to.” It feels like she’s sitting in a sauna, she’s so flustered from this conversation. “But only if you do, and I understand if you didn’t-”

 “No.” It’s abrupt, cutting her off. A definite answer that leaves no room for questioning. “No, I do. I just-” He clears his throat. “-I didn’t want to bring it up, in case we weren’t on the same page. “ This seems to be a recurring theme, so far. “And it’s not a must. If you change your mind-”

 It’s pure instinct. There’s no thought involved as she closes the gap between them, this time with her on top, and presses  her lips against his. The response is immediate and enthusiastic. She considers just going on, not putting a stop to things, but realization hits that, although overall she’s ready for this to happen, she’s not ready for it to happen tonight. There’s still things she needs to take care of. Most importantly, protection.

 So, gasping for breath, she pulls away. “I’m calling for a rain check, but if after that, you still think I’ll change my mind-” she pushes back her hair and forces herself to take a deep breath. “-then you may just be beyond help, Barnes.” If the chuckle is anything to judge from, she’s made her point.

_________________________________________________________________________________

 Wow. Bucky thinks to himself as he exits out of the browser tab on his phone. That’s enough internet for one day. Too much, actually. He knows that it’s the information superhighway, but good god, no one needs THAT much information. He really needs to be more specific with what he googles… or less… or just not at all.

 He’d never admit it (and really, who the hell is gonna ask him anyway), but he spent the last hour looking up how to have sex. He’s engaged in the act before, yeah, but it was seventy years ago. Plus, it used to be this huge taboo thing that you suspected was going on behind closed doors, but no one (not even the married couples) owned up to it. If you were ever found out, there were severe consequences. As a man, he didn’t have to worry as much, but if whoever the woman was had her dirty laundry aired… oh boy. She’d be a pariah, a “scarlet woman”, unfit for marriage or to even give the time of day. That led to limited encounters, and, well, it just seemed smart to brush up on what information is out there. As it turns out, people have written a lot about the fine art of love making. Unfortunately for him, most of it is absolute garbage. Some of the positions he just read about (because at that point, the article was like a train wreck; he badly wanted to look away, but he couldn’t) don’t even sound possible, much less pleasurable. He’s all for society being freer, but good grief!

 He’s halfway through a bottle of straight vodka (it won’t have any effect, but he’s hoping maybe the alcohol will travel to his brain and sanitize his eyeballs from most of the shit he just read) when his phone rings. Great. He’s always happy to talk to her, but right now… wow. It’s gonna take him some time to recover, so he hopes she doesn’t need him to say much.

 “Hey, Doll.”

 “I am so fucking pissed off right now.” That sounds promising.

 “At what?”

 “The city of Bucharest, my apartment, the landlord, whoever the fuck did the plumbing in this building! God!” She’s clearly out of breath, so it takes a minute before she can speak again. “I’m sorry, Buck. It’s just that I came home from work, and one of my neighbors told me the entire sixth floor is under a good inch, inch and a half of water.” Wait-

 “How-”

 “I don’t know. Busted pipe. It’s leaked down onto the fifth floor, so I’ve got about fifty other pissed off people for company.”

 “Jesus.” 

 She chuckles harshly. “Yeah, we could use him right about now to perform a miracle. This is a shit show, and I haven’t even told you the best part.”

 “So the spontaneous flood wasn’t the highlight of your day?”

 “I fucking wish! So, naturally, I tried to call the landlord, along with basically everyone else. Get this: since it’s after five o’clock on a Friday, he’s not gonna do anything. Told us collectively to suck it up! And of course, when there’s a leak, they have to cut the power…” He’s starting to see a pattern here.

 She sighs. “I really needed to get that off my chest. How are you?” Still slightly weirded out by the information overload, but feeling a little more steady now that he’s got a good catastrophe to concentrate on. However, that’s probably not the best answer to go with.

 “Better than you are.”

 “What, the sky isn’t falling where you are?” He chuckles.

 “No, it’s right where it’s supposed to be.”  Which reminds him… “But since it seems like you’re short a functional home, why don’t you just stay here until they sort things out?” He’s got a couch that, while it doesn’t have anything on an actual bed, he can manage to sleep on for the next few nights. Or maybe they can share his bed. He shakes his head. That thought needs to be put to the side, even if it’s meant in the most innocent way possible. Of course, in case she decides to cash in that rain check…

 “Yes. I mean, that would be great, if you’re sure.”

 “I’m sure.” Actually, he can’t think of a better way to spend the weekend. The plan was to meet up either Saturday or Sunday, possibly both, so this isn’t that far out of the ordinary.

 “Okay, but just a warning: They’re not letting us go up to our floor in case there’s been electrical damage as well-” That’s smart. If the pipes are in that bad of condition, who knows what the wiring looks like. “-so all I have is my purse, backpack, and what I wore to work. No toothbrush or pajamas, or anything like that.”

 “That’s alright. All you have to bring is yourself.” He’ll have to look, but he’s pretty sure he has something in his closet that’ll work okay for her until she gets the all clear to go into her apartment. Plus, there’s a laundry mat just around the corner, not to mention a pharmacy.

 “Thank you. I really appreciate it.” 

 “Not a problem.” He glances at his bedside clock. Five thirty-four. It takes roughly half an hour to get across the city by bus, so… “I’ll see you around six fifteen?”

 “See you then.”

 As soon as the line goes dead, he springs into action. First thing’s first: make sure there’s no dirty clothes, old dishes, or trash laying around. That takes all of five minutes. He should probably check that he does indeed have something she can wear so they won’t have to fumble around later. Tshirts are pretty universal and… yes, he has a few pajama bottoms that have a drawstring waist. How much time does he have left? The phone screen lights up, giving him his answer. Twenty-seven minutes. More than enough time to run around the corner and pick up a few things.

 His intention is to buy the basics: spare toothbrush, deodorant, hairbrush, maybe a different shampoo than his three-in-one body wash (it’s convenient for him, but she might prefer something designated for hair specifically). But, well, there’s quite a few aisles, and he gets sucked in. Does he need to buy razors, or is that rude, like he thinks she’s hairy? What about aspirin? How often do most people get headaches? He honestly can’t remember. 

 By the time he realizes that he really needs to get a move on, his basket is full and he has no idea what aisle he’s on. Desperately, he looks around, and his eyes land on… huh. So they just have them out in the open these days. Last time he was in the market for that, he had to beg a married friend to make the purchase for him. He briefly wonders if he’ll need to produce proof of marriage or something similar, but pushes the thought to the side. It’s the 2000s. He can probably just go up to the register and pay, and no one will give him a second look. But there’s just one problem: which brand? He should google… suddenly remembering his adventure from earlier today, he decides to just go with his gut and pick one. There. Now, he needs to pay and get the fuck out of here because there’s only ten minutes left, and he’d rather not have these out in the open, in case she thinks that’s the reason he’s asked her to stay over. If it happens, great. If not… well, he’s made it for the past seventy years. What’s a few more?

___________________________________________________________________________________

 She was still pretty shaken up when she arrived at his apartment, carrying her backpack and purse, slightly damp from the drizzle of rain now covering the city. But immediately receiving a long hug, being instructed to make herself at home, and hearing the offer to take a shower so she could warm up did a lot to restore her good mood.

 It was one of the sweetest thing she’s ever experienced in a lifetime where most people have showed her their worst, going into that bathroom and finding a new toothbrush, stick of deodorant, nail clippers, hairbrush, and even shampoo. That and Barnes bashfully informing her that, “I’ll stay in the living room until you’re done. Take your time.” She almost suggested that he just join her in an attempt to broach the subject they left off on two nights ago, but thought better of it. She’s just started to strip when a knock comes from the other side of the wall.

 “Sorry. I just remembered that I forgot to give you a change of clothes. Can I leave them outside the door?” A smile forms on her face.  

 “Sure. Go ahead.” No one’s given this much thought to her comfort or boundaries before. Yet another reason she knows this is the right decision.

 She doesn’t stay in the shower for long, just enough time to wash and stop shivering. After toweling off and brushing out her hair, she cracks open the door. Sure enough, a worn but clean tshirt and pair of pajama bottoms are waiting for her. The familiar scent of the laundry detergent he uses envelopes her as she dresses and, at long last, leaves the safety of the bathroom.

 True to his word, he’s still sitting on the couch, thumbing through a book she gave him some months back (he’s missed so many feats of literature that have made their way into pop culture; today’s choice is The Hobbit because, while it was out before everything happened to him, he’s never read it) when she emerges. Just in case he’s so absorbed that he hasn’t heard her, she repeats his gesture from earlier and knocks softly on the wall.

 “Hey. I’m out. You can have your apartment back.”

 “Hey.” That smile always makes her feel slightly unsteady on her feet. “Find everything okay?”

 “I did.” She settles into the place next to him. “Thank you, by the way. You didn’t have to go out and get supplies.”

 “I know.” He nods, hand closing around hers. “But I wanted to make sure you had whatever you needed.”

 They chat for a while about their days, discuss what they should do with the weekend ahead, even throw out ideas for dinner. The entire time, she’s trying to figure out the best way to bring up that she’d really like to finish what they started the other night. However, by the time he’s left to grab some sort of takeout, she’s still no closer to an answer.

 Fortunately, their dates usually follow a pattern. Food, a movie, and then the not-so-innocent cuddles. This time, he’s on top of her when she feels the tell-tale sign that he’s as fired up as she is, so she suggests,

 “Do want to maybe move to somewhere more comfortable?” His already dilated pupils grow even larger, and he nods.

 “Yeah. That sounds like a plan.” She waits for him to roll off of her and head towards the bedroom before she grabs her purse and, digging around inside, grabs one of the foil packages she bought after their last date.

 It’s only once she closes the door behind her, shutting them into an enclosed space with a bed (not to mention it’s pretty damn clear what both of their intentions are), that nerves get the better of her.  He takes a step towards her, and she leans up to kiss him, but he ducks his head out of the way.

 “You’re shaking.” His hand ghosts over her arm, making it obvious that, by comparison, she’s practically vibrating on the spot.

 “Sorry.” She chuckles nervously. “It’ll pass.”

 “It’s alright.” As he says it, he meets her eyes. “We can stop. Nothing has to happen.”

 “I know.” She nods, swallowing hard. “But I want it to.” Their lips briefly meet before he pulls away again.

 “Let me ask you, just before we get started, is this-” He stops short, eyes darting from her face to the wall and back again. “...have you… before?” Oh. “Not that it matters, not to me, I just wanted to know so that-”

 “I have.” She nods, feeling heat rise to her cheeks. “Once. I was eighteen, and-” It was awful. She’d been seeing the guy for a few months and he kept whining about her not putting out, so she decided to get it over with. He went in dry without any warning, and when she asked him to stop, give her a second to adjust, he told her he couldn’t. She was bleeding and in pain for days afterwards, and to top it off, when her period was late, she thought that, even though he’d pulled out, she was pregnant. That turned out not to be the case, but it, along with the fact that she usually doesn’t stay in one place for very long, has put a damper on her ever wanting to do that again. Except for now. “-it wasn’t a great experience.”

 “I’m sorry.” On instinct, she searches for the judgment in his face, the disgust. It’s nowhere to be found, only genuine sympathy. “I’ll do my best to make sure this time is better. That is, if you’re still up to it.”

 “I am.” Not waiting for a reply, she wraps her arms around him and starts trailing kisses up his neck towards his ear. “I am. I trust you.” She hears his breath catch, but before she can comment, he’s hoisted her up and is carrying her in the direction of the bed.

 As he sets her down, she pulls him on top of her, letting her hands wander over his sides, up his back. After a few moments, she feels his fingers move from her hips to toy with the hem of her… his.. shirt.

 “Is this okay? Can I take this off?” She starts to nod, but remembers just in time that he’s so close, they’d butt heads.

 “Please.” She expected to feel exposed once she was at least partially undressed, but instead she feels… adored. His eyes are roaming over her newly exposed skin, though his hands have respectfully returned to her waist. In a moment of confidence, she reaches behind her and unhooks her bra. There. Now she’s completely shirtless.

 “You’re so beautiful.” The flush from her cheeks is spreading down her neck, but she still smiles.

 “Care to make things even?” It’s brief, but she catches the look of hesitation.

 “Sure.” Before she can offer to do it, he shrugs his shirt over his head, revealing to her, for the first time, the entirity of his metal arm. She must look for a moment too long, because with a shrug, he informs her, “I can put my shirt back on. No big deal. I know there’s some scarring…” That’s not going to fly. She needs to reassure him, make him feel as desired as he’s made her feel.

 “Or if you want to stop-” She stands and, after briefly making eye contact, places a kiss on the most prominent scar.

 “Don’t you dare think that way for a second.” They’re flush against each other, chest to bare chest. “Not for one.” Slowly, she slides her hands from his shoulders down to his waist, hesitating just over the button. “Is this okay?” Another shakey breath.

 “Yes.”

 Going forward, it’s much less awkward. The rest of their clothing is shed, and soon they’re back to their previous position; on the bed, with him on top of her. She feels his fingertips brush the inside of her thigh and gasps.

 “May I touch you?” She nods.

���“You’d better.”

 It’s gentle, more of him feeling her out than anything else. Still, she can’t help but think this is infinitely better already than last time around. Suddenly, he pulls his hand away, and it takes all her effort not to whine at the loss of contact. Before she can ask if something’s wrong, does he want to stop, he’s flat on his stomach, head between her legs.

 “Tell me if you need me to stop.”

 “What-” Her breath catches as it becomes infinitely clear what he’s doing.

 Again, she’s expecting pain when, after several minutes he eases a finger into her, but at this point, she’s so wet that there’s absolutely no difficulty.

 “Are you okay?” She nods.

 “Don’t stop.”

 The process is agonizingly slow, he’s so intent on his task. When, finally, he pulls away, she’s so close that she can almost taste it.

 “Do you still want to-”

 “If you don’t stop asking me that, I’m gonna slap you.” It’s a joke, and she thinks he knows it, but just to be sure, she siezes his hand (the metal one, which is usually cold but has now warmed from being held close against her body. “I’m ready, so long as you want this too.”

 “I do. You wouldn’t believe how much.” Yeah, she thinks she would. “Just give me a second.” Perfect timing. He rolls off of her, which gives her the opening she needs to grab the packet she managed to hide under the pillow while he was… otherwise distracted. When he returns from digging inside the wardrobe, she holds it up, only to realize-

 “Oh.” He’s got one as well. “Seems like we both came prepared.”

 He chuckles. “Just in case, although that wasn’t why I asked you to stay.”

 “I know.” She nods and pats the space next to her. “Not why I said yes either, although I can’t say I’m disappointed.”

 He returns to the bed and drops his packet onto the nightstand. “Save this one for later?”

 “Definitely.”

 There is a bit of discomfort once he starts to push inside her, but it’s not painful. Just… overwhelming. Slightly embarassed she asks,

 “Can you wait a second? Please?”

 “Of course. Are you alright?” She shifts her hips slightly, making them both groan.

 “Fine. You can move now.”

 She may have only done this once before, and she has no idea what his experience consists of, but as she hits her peak mere seconds before he does, gently coaxed over the edge, she can’t help but think some things are better the second time around.

 “I love you.” It’s whispered against her neck as, once she cleans up and returns to bed, she settles herself against him.

 “I love you too.”

___________________________________________________________________________________

 The first thing he thinks when he realizes that he’s not alone in bed is that HYDRA’s found him. He’s being activated. His eyes shoot open although apart from that he doesn’t move a muscle, and that’s when he recognizes the person next to him. It’s her. She’s here.

 The events of last night come back to him all at once, and he feels a smile forming on his face. It’s been a while, and in any case, it would be wrong to run a comparison, but what they shared, the pure intimacy of it both physically and mentally was incredible. Maybe he should feel a sense of shame. That’s what he was taught growing up. But instead he feels… peaceful.

 That is, until her eyelids flutter and she rolls over, shifting the covers so that he gets a good view of her still naked body, and with it, the bruises on her thighs and hips. Bruises unmistakably left by his fingers. Dammit. He’s done the last thing he ever wanted to do: he’s hurt her.

 “Good morning, sleepy head.” She yawns, the teasing words muffled. “It seems like we overslept.”

 His mouth goes dry, and all he can manage to choke out is a simple, “Yeah.”

 She frowns, sitting up slightly, and lets out a small groan. “You alright there, Bucky? You look a little off.” The late morning light only serves to highlight more marks he’s left, this time on her shoulders, neck, and breasts. Stubble burn. Hickeys. Why the hell was he so rough? At the time, he thought he was being gentle, but obviously he’s just as much of a monster as Bucky Barnes as he is once the Winter Soldier takes over.

 She’s still staring at him, brow furrowing in concern.

 “Fine.” He clears his throat and begins to sit up. “Stay here. I’ll make you a cup of tea, maybe some oatmeal.”

 “Alright. Don’t be gone too long.”

 Her words follow him out of the room, and into the kitchen. Fuck. He should’ve known better. 

Maybe once upon a time, he was a decent man, one who could be with a woman like  her and not do her a disservice. But now, it’s clear that he falls short in every way. In an act that was supposed to be pure pleasure, a way of communicating how much they mean to each other, he’s hurt her.

 “I trust you.” The words from last night ring in his ears. He shouldn’t have let her. It’s pretty damn obvious that, even at the best of times, he can’t be trusted.

 “Tell me what’s going on.” Even with his enhanced senses, he still jumps in surprise as the unexpected words come from behind him. He turns around slowly, not wanting to startle her. She’s standing there, clad in only one of his shirts, arms crossed over her chest (now bearing his marks), staring him down.

 “Nothing.” He shakes his head.

 “Bullshit. I had a vision of you staring off into space, and here you are, jumpy as a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs.” At another time, her choice in phrases would make him chuckle, but right now, he can’t muster it.

 “Last night-” Her eyes widen, but she stays silent. “I hurt you.”

 “No, you didn’t. Not at all.”

 “I did.”

 She frowns. “Bucky, I think I’d know if you’d hurt me, and I’m telling you, I’m fine.”

 “Doll, look at yourself!” He reaches out to take her arm, but immediately freezes. “Go in the bathroom and take off your shirt. Take a good look in the mirror and then tell me I didn’t hurt you.”

 “Alright.” Her jaw clenches, and she marches off in the direction of the bathroom. A deep sickness gnaws at the pit of his stomach and, completely worn out, he sinks into a kitchen chair.

 Not thirty seconds pass before she walks back into the room, this time completely undressed.

 “Tell me you’re not talking about a few love bites.”

 “And bruises! You may not have noticed, but they’re in the exact shape of my fingertips.”

 “Oh my god!” She shakes her head. “It’s a sex injury. A minor one at that! If you didn’t heal so damn fast, you’d probably have nail marks all over your back!”

 “That’s not the same thing.”

 “How is it not the same thing?”

 “I’m a monster! And you’re not.”

 She takes a determined step towards him, and he leans as far back as the chair will allow.

 “Bucky, you are not a monster, and I am not afraid of you.”

 “Then you’re stupid.” He hates himself for his sharp words, but she needs to take this seriously. Underestimating how dark, how evil he can be, is a mistake. A deadly one.

 “Hey!”

 “Don’t you get it?” Without any input from his brain, he stands. “They could find me, and with a few words, I could stare you dead in the eyes as I murdered you! If you were my mission, I wouldn’t even hesitate, and you’d be dead before your body hit the floor!” Her mouth falls open, but she immediately closes it again. “This isn’t something that can be worked through with some patience and a positive attitude! I could kill you!”

 “So could a million other things!” Her voice rises in volume, and before he can contain it-

 “But they’re not in the bed sleeping next to you!” He’s shouting at her. God. Everyone is right. He’s beyond saving.

 A few tense seconds pass before she looks up at him, a steely look in her eyes.

 “Look, I get it. I know what you could do to me.” As she speaks, she pulls out a chair and sits. “But I could also get run over when I cross the road, or the room could fill with carbon monoxide while I sleep. I could have an aneurysm and drop before anyone knows what’s happening.”

 He opens his mouth to tell her the likelihood of any of those things happening is far lower than the chance that he’ll hurt her, this time in a major way, but she holds up a hand, silencing him.

 “I’m gonna be cautious, but I’m also not going to live my life in fear that the ceiling is going to collapse or nuclear war is going to strike, or that someone is gonna turn up and say the magic words that make you go cuckoo for cocoa puffs-” What? “-and I just realized you’re too old for that reference.”

 “That’s another thing-” He’s about to remind her exactly how big their age gap is, that although he’s physically close to her age, chronologically, he’s closer to the age of her great grandfather, but she lets out a sudden groan of frustration, and that makes him bite his tongue.

 “Oh, fuck off, Barnes! If you’re about to start in on how you’re too old for me, then I’m not gonna wait for you to go full Winter Soldier before I kick your ass!” Out of all things, that’s what snaps him out of it, makes him feel like maybe, just maybe, there’s still a chance they can make the best of things.

 Smirking, he asks her,

 “You think you could kick my ass? Really?” It must be the breaking point for her too, because she snickers.

 “Of course. It’s the little bitches you have to watch out for.”  That’s it, he’s laughing, nearly doubled over, and from the looks of things, she’s in much the same state.

 “You’re something else, you know that?” He asks between stilted breaths.

 “I think we both fit in that category, Pal.” Her smile fades, but only slightly. “Bucky, if you really want me to go, if that’s what’ll give you peace, then I’ll do it, but I meant what I said. I trust you.” Never. He’ll never want her to go, he’s sure of it. Well then, that only leaves one option.

 “I know what we’re doing today.” It’s an abrupt segue, but it’s the only thing he could come up with on short notice.

 “And what’s that?”  The microwave dings, reminding him that he needs to stir the oatmeal, and he pushes past her.

 “Sit down and have your tea. You’re going to need all your energy if I’m gonna show you how to use a gun.” If she’s staying, then at least he can teach her how to defend herself beyond the basics she already knows.

 “So I guess this means you’re keeping me around for a little while longer?” It’s spoken like a joke, but he turns to her, meeting her eyes to drive the point home.

 “Yeah, Doll. As long as you want me."

[thejustmaiden]

Heyo, fellow Inuyasha fans! Happy Friday! This particular blog will serve as a collection of random thoughts I’ve been mulling over lately. Hope you’ll consider giving it a read. By the way, it’ll specifically pertain to the Sessrin ship. If that’s not something that is of interest to you, then no need to read any further. Whatever happens, I wanted to get this out before the sequel. Alrighty, let’s go! 

I’m not sure many of us realize just how much fiction sparks public dialogue and shapes culture. There have been countless studies and research done to prove it, therefore this really isn’t up for debate. What the real question here should be is have we taken the time to fully contemplate and assess just how much fictional experiences are able to change or influence our perspective on real, everyday life? The visual arts are just one of many evolutionary adaptations that serve to give us more insight into one another’s mind. If our outlook on fiction contrasts with said insight, then perhaps some re-evaluating is in order.  

Powerful works of literature such as 1984 and the beloved Harry Potter series are just two examples. George Orwell’s book contributed strongly to how readers viewed government and politics during that time, and to this day it’s a book that resonates with many. As much as Harry Potter is cherished all across the world, there are religious and academic institutions that condemn it or have even gone so far as to ban it. I may not agree with the extreme measures taken, but it’s fascinating nonetheless to witness the extent to which fiction can move and mobilize people for a cause.

The takeaway is that indicating fiction doesn’t have the power to create change in our everyday lives is misleading to say the least. So how exactly then can fictional stories that are, after all, completely made up affect society in such profound ways? It all lies in the power of the psychology of fiction. According to cognitive psychologist and novelist, Keith Oatley, who’s been researching the psychological effects of fiction for over a decade, he states that engaging with stories about other people can improve empathy and theory of mind. When we identify with these characters’ struggles, we begin to share their frustration for societal problems that plague them. These types of stories tap into our emotions more so than- believe it or not- nonfiction, and thus their effects inspire us and even have the ability to alter our worldviews. 

I’ll be returning to that specific topic a bit later, but moving on for now!

It’s safe to say that I speak on behalf of the majority of antis. That being said, I first want to add that we are aware that sessrin shippers claim to agree that there was nothing inherently romantic that took place between Rin and Sesshomaru during their travels together. The thing is we have trouble believing you guys when you time and time again provide contradictory statements to defend your stance.

Voicing things like, “all signs point to Rin” and “it’s been foreshadowed” sends the exact opposite message of what you supposedly stand for and, if anything, confirms that you’ve had romance on your mind long before it would’ve been acceptable to come out with openly. You can’t just go along with what we say when it’s convenient to your argument and then back it up later with “who else but Rin.” How can the relationship you’re imagining be so obvious if they didn’t hint at it for the whole duration of the original series like we agreed upon? Elaborate on how we could’ve possibly come to such wildly different conclusions when we started AND left off with the same views for and throughout the series. 

On top of that, making the excuse that we don’t speak for adult!Rin and that she has the right to make her own decisions once she’s old enough is a weak defense. Firstly, because we haven’t even met her. Secondly, because it’s unfair of you to assert that you know what’s best for Rin and then say we’re not allowed to just because it doesn’t align with your beliefs. I get that you feel protective over her character, but do recall that this adult version of her none of us have actually met yet. We have no idea what kind of woman she’s become, what her dreams or aspirations may be, and whether she’s married or even wants to be. I’m not against the idea of her falling in love, I just don’t think it’ll be with Sesshomaru. I guess I’m also a fan of the idea of her following in Kaede’s footsteps, because if anyone can grow up to be an independent, trusted, and wise leader of the community like her it’s Rin.

To make matters worse, way too many of you continue to celebrate the drama cd and profess that it was sweet that Sesshomaru basically promised he’d wait for Rin all while somehow ignoring the glaring grooming implications. Why do you only see what you want to see and fail to acknowledge that actual child grooming scenarios do in fact play out like this in real life? A high percentage of people who have been victims of grooming can attest to this. If Sessrin does go canon, all the sequel succeeded in doing to avoid the direct correlation with grooming was skip over the more questionable and dodgy portions of it. Take out the time jump, however, and you no longer have a loophole to cover up the scary unmistakable truth, which is that Sessrin and grooming are essentially one in the same.

No one case is identical to another so please don’t come to me with your “but how is it grooming if Sesshomaru didn’t manipulate Rin” refutes. Nobody knows what the hell went on during those years between The Final Act and this upcoming sequel. Based on everything exhibited so far- that is if we decide to recognize the drama cd like so many of you choose to do- Sessrin’s dynamic is eerily reminiscent of real life child grooming. Why else do you think a lot of us fans have a huge problem with it? It’s triggering for a reason. 

Let’s be honest, Sesshomaru’s supposed love confession could’ve just been the first of many gestures like it. Who really knows, right? According to you shippers, a major shift in their relationship took place sometime during this critical period none of us got to watch unfold. I’m sure you all have explored the various ways this would’ve gone down in fan fiction and through other creative means of expression. Not to spoil the fun, but all I can’t help but wonder about is just how many of those supposed “cute moments” would’ve been as creepy and cringey as that proposal. Hundreds of thousands (possibly millions?!) of fans would undoubtedly agree with me, too. It seems to me this ain’t due to a mere difference of opinion. Taste is one thing, ethics a whole other. 

By the way, in case you didn’t know, groomers don’t necessarily need to plan out every single move in order for their behavior to constitute as grooming. What we should be paying attention to instead is the fact that Sesshomaru made a conscious decision to act on his own selfish desire for a young girl who couldn’t have possibly known in that moment the magnitude of what he was asking of her. Why is it that a vulnerable Rin is put in a position that forces her to be the one responsible for making such a big, life-changing decision for the both of them? Yes, Sesshomaru gave her the choice and, yes, she doesn’t have to make it till later, but why on Earth is he coming to her with this well before a child her age is ready and mature enough to handle it? Even if his intentions are good (broadly speaking of course), his what you shippers probably call “innocent acts” are incidentally coercing Rin into reciprocating his feelings. Whether he planned for that or not, he’s at fault. Period. 

That’s one way the power imbalance works. A child wants nothing more than to please the adult they look up to and adore, because they’re impressionable like that. Maybe Rin processes this like she’ll want whatever he wants, so that’s what she trains herself to believe- either right then and there or over time. Plus, if you really think about it, why wouldn’t she trust him if in her eyes he’s been nothing but good to her and that’s all she’s ever really known? (Psst! Charm is integral to the manipulative nature of grooming so it’s deceiving AKA manipulation can come off as praise or flattery.) Bottom line is that Rin is too young to have to think about this kind of deep stuff at all, and Sesshomaru shouldn’t have taken advantage of the power he had/has over her to influence a decision she was by no means prepared to hear about much less decide on. Your headcanons seem to imply that she’ll eventually have to choose though, and Idk about you but I rather not push my own fantasy agenda onto a underage girl regardless of how much I want it. Idc if she’s fictional, it wouldn’t feel right so why would I want to see that? My principals couldn’t ever allow for it.   

Even if it wasn’t an official proposal, per se, it’s still disturbing to me that so many of you find joy in the thought of a grown adult male essentially waiting for a young girl HE KNEW to become old enough before pursuing her. I know this drama cd ain’t technically canon, y'all, but since this is literally the only source we have that may foreshadow a potential Sessrin to come, and it’s referenced a lot, I figured it still should be called out for exactly what it is- Grooming: 101!!!!

Just as I demonstrated above, fiction has the ability to make even the most inappropriate and uncomfortable situations be viewed in a favorable light when you put the right spin on it. *cough* Lolicon culture, need I say more? *cough* Despite what you may believe, the strategies fiction utilizes to explain themes/concepts can genuinely lead to how we perceive them, and ultimately to how we come to make sense of a similar event presented to us in real life. Especially if we have no prior experience with any of it and have nothing to compare something to, these perceptions can be dangerous yet still persuasive to certain fans- young ones in particular. The more narrative consistency across stories and different mediums, the more likely they’ll influence social beliefs. Minors don’t possess the same capacity as adults to think critically about the content they consume, and if we aren’t more careful about what we put out there then all of us will continue to face serious repercussions.

This is precisely why it’s crucial we persist in our fight against the rabid phenomenon of glorifying young girls in every sexual context imaginable. Just look at what something as seemingly harmless as fiction has the power to do. The scope of fiction is broad and far-reaching, and it’s about time we stop denying that fact and actually do something about it if we have the means to.

The truth of the matter is that we’re in desperate need of proper education and training programs on this issue in our communities. Families need to ensure their children have access to the necessary resources, but it isn’t just on them. ALL of us gotta do our part and ALL of us should be up for the task. It takes a village, right? If we do not properly discuss and address child sexual abuse (CSA) with our children and in public forums, including the internet, then we’re ultimately accepting incidents of CSA should they arise. Consequently, that also translates to indirectly accepting that the predators among us stay untreated and/or unpunished. That’s how the generational and societal aspect of the abuse can continue, and we must do everything in our power to secure our children’s future. Yes, even when it comes to fiction.

If you still somehow don’t think the Sessrin pairing has anything to do with grooming, allow me to break this down for you one more time:

1. If some of your fellow sessrin shippers say that a relationship like this in real life is harmful, then that should be pretty telling in and of itself.

2. Piggybacking off #1: if your only defense to that is “well it’s just fiction,” then you should ask yourself why you can’t ever come up with better reasons. Same goes for history and culture, so please stop using those to justify this relationship. None of the above can or should be applied since it’s already been established that fiction pervades our lives and vice versa.

3. If fellow shippers who are victims of grooming say they are drawn to Sessrin because it allows them in a way to “take back control” from their abuser so that they can better cope with past traumas, then they’re inadvertently admitting that Sessrin does possess qualities associated with the past child sexual abuse they underwent. AKA Sessrin is relatable for its abusive dynamic.

I have to ask by the way, but why do you get so offended when we don’t support your ship anyway? Is it because we interpret it to be controversial and you don’t like your ship getting a bad rap? Is it because it would be insulting to admit that antis actually have a point in it being problematic and you rather double down instead? Or is it because you’re projecting yourself onto Rin and prefer to not go into detail about why that is? Maybe it’s too personal, or maybe it’s because deep down you’re ashamed. Of course that doesn’t mean you’re bad people, but suppressing these kind of negative emotions can’t be healthy for anyone. A little awareness and self-reflection on your part can benefit not just you but all of us in the long run. Cognitive dissonance can suck, but it’s also part of being human. 

I recently came across a comment I’d like to share with you. Unfortunately, this is not the first time nor will it be the last I see the likes of it. Anyway, in it a fan stated how embarrassing it must be being an Anti in this fandom when an episode like “Forever with Lord Sesshomaru” exists. Guys, this shipper and all those who liked their post are showing their true colors. Perpetuating and/or anticipating these sexualized images of young girls is a grave issue in both our society and media alike. I think we can all agree on that, or at least I hope so. It’s remarks like these that prove we still got a long way to go in terms of progress, and if we ever hope to effectively reverse some of our backwards way of thinking. So serious question for ya in regard to this: Why is it too much to ask that grooming be portrayed for what it is? Grooming. To clarify, grooming is bad and needs to be painted in a bad light. It’s as simple as that. If only we could all acknowledge it for what it is, we wouldn’t be in this predicament. 

Historical accuracy and cultural differences aside, it appears the crux of the matter between Sessrin shippers and Antis is our acceptance and/or denial of fiction’s influence on real life. If we can’t agree on this, then we’ll never agree on anything else. As mentioned earlier, there is more than enough evidence to support the idea that fiction impacts our lives in extraordinary ways. I, for one, believe in the transformative power of stories. I think they do more for us than many of us give them credit for and/or are inclined to admit. 

This is partially why I believe that the majority of sessrin folk are missing the point most of the time. All they do is focus on insignificant and irrelevant information that accomplishes nothing but more gaslighting and strawmanning. Whether it be an intentional or unconscious decision, whatever we argue goes right over their head. All they do is throw around deflections and antagonizing remarks that serve no real purpose other than to make Antis out to be the unreasonable and irrational ones. Making connections between our own lives and our stories is a completely natural and normal occurrence. If those particular shippers insist on denying just how interconnected real life and fiction both are, what that tells me is they’re either out of touch with reality or deliberately choose to be.

Just to be clear, I am of the opinion that most if not all antis aren’t real life predators. If they say they aren’t, I honestly take their word for it. Speaking to Sessrin shipper directly: We know it’s not Sesshomaru you want to be but Rin. No, we’re not calling you pedophiles or groomers. None of us think you are using a fictional ship to attract underage fans to be the Rin in your life or anything of the sort. We are well aware that many of you are self-inserting yourself as Rin, so please don’t feel the need to tell us yourself because that would be stating the obvious.

I learned from a few of you since this sequel was announced that the Sessrin relationship isn’t just a ship but an opportunity for you to confront the person who used and abused you. So there’s two issues with this I’d like to raise. (Sorry if I’m repeating myself, but it’s urgent I stress this again!) This is what I have to say:

If fiction does not affect real life or have the ability to normalize anything as you claim to believe, then why does “fixing” what happened to you via your preferred choice of coping associated with these two characters in the first place? Why bring your past abuse into this at all if at the end of the day it’s “just fiction” and nothing more to you but a source of entertainment?

By confessing that you use Sessrin to cope with your past trauma, you therein reveal that Sessrin does in fact resemble an adult-child relationship with a grooming dynamic. So why then would you want other fans to be exposed to a pairing that brings to mind the very abuse you endured? We’re supposed to stop this toxic cycle- NOT find more ways to manifest and relive it, much less subject other fans to it. 

You may think that Sessrin doesn’t fit the textbook definition of what child grooming is, but that’s not to say it doesn’t embody it or that it doesn’t at the very least have traces of it that stand out. 

“Antis are miserable people who don’t know how to enjoy a good story. It’s just fiction, stop ruining it for other fans!”

Well, no, it’s not just fiction or just a story. Some of you evidently went and proved that yourself, and without my help, by revealing how you relate Sessrin to your own life and apply it to cope with past abuse. Past abuse or not, as far as I can tell we’re all equally invested in these characters. That speaks volumes and just goes to show that fiction touches our lives in long-lasting ways.

I have something I want to say concerning some of who believe that it’s inconsiderate of antis who have been victims of grooming or another form of child abuse to tell other victims who ship Sessrin how they should cope with their trauma. Now as much as I respect the various means victims discover to deal with their painful pasts, there’s always an appropriate time and a place for these things to occur. We must seek out better ways to safely cope with the abuse we lived through (if any) without running the risk of hurting and endangering others. 

There are plenty of fans in other fandoms who don’t try to defend their ships going canon, because they’re able to recognize an unhealthy or toxic pairing when they see one and won’t try to justify it. A Sessrin romance simply does not belong on a show geared towards teens, and I really don’t need to go into detail about why we shouldn’t support it, at least canon-wise. Shipping Sessrin is your right, but if you don’t keep it to yourself and your corner of the fandom then you really shouldn’t be surprised by the opposition. All we ask is you respect that their specific dynamic falls under the category of child grooming (or very close) and should be treated as such in public. The world of fiction may be wider than the world we live in, but that doesn’t always mean “anything goes.” In the creative spaces our minds occupy we must still adhere to the same fundamental and moral guidelines we live by in life. There’s nothing wrong with exploring new terrains and experimenting with ideas, but we must also remember that our stories are all about communicating and connecting with people. So let’s please be more mindful of the sort of messages they’re sending. 

Besides, this isn’t only about you and what makes you feel safe, it’s about all of us. I don’t know how much more I can stress that really. How can thoughts endanger our children, you ask? Well, it’s not like we’re suggesting that our thoughts can jump out of our tvs, materialize themselves, and place kids under mind control. The forces behind fiction are a lot more complex and nuanced than a “monkey see, monkey do” approach, so don’t waste any more time trying to  describe that to us. You’re taking this argument in the wrong direction. 

Take the “violent video games breed killers” theory. I’m afraid you’re misconstruing what we’re saying and then taking it quite too literally. Please stop twisting our words, because nobody on our side is saying that just because you play violent video games that you’ll become a violent person. The Sessrin equivalent of that would be if you ship them then you must be a pedophile or turning into one. *sigh* I know you guys are feeling attacked, but I’m afraid your defensive nature is keeping you from thinking straight. Clearly, there are always exceptions (I’d recommend reading up on the Slender Man case), but Antis aren’t saying you’re one of them.

You see, it’s not so much about the content as it is the notion of the content. Kids and teens who are playing these video games have been informed that killing is wrong, because they grew up learning that early on like the rest of us. No sane person would advocate for violence and nonsensical killing in real life. Since they fully understand the severity of the consequences of killing a person in real life, they are able make a clear distinction between the two. When it comes to killing there is hardly any ambiguity. Sadly, that is far from the truth when it comes to sexualizing girls. It should immediately be perceived as wrong leaving no room for interpretation, and yet here we are still putting up with these inaccurate and demeaning female representations.

Most children who have been groomed don’t realize it till years down the road. If they aren’t ever taught the telltale signs to properly labeling grooming situations, how do you expect them to make sense of and relate to a fictional version? Let’s think of about it from a child’s perspective. Yes, this includes teens who rely pretty heavily on adult guidance and the content we put out there for them. Put yourself in their shoes for a moment and picture that you’ve never had child grooming explained to you (because that’s just the reality for so many unfortunately). Wouldn’t you say it’s possible for them to deduce that what they see on their screens is how they come to discern something in real life, especially if they have little to no experience with it? Perceived realism is plausible, y'all.

What it comes down to in the end is that the ideas and emotions we cultivate behind these stories leave an impression on others. Impressions are capable of influencing the way we see the world, which in turn affects us and beyond just our imagination. The way I look at it, stories contribute to how and why we normalize certain beliefs and trends. If fiction reflects real life like most of us tend to agree, then wouldn’t you say Sessrin is a (in)direct result of this world’s tendency to place young girls in overly sexual or romantic environments? Where do you think fiction draws its inspiration from? Sure, some of it originates from our imagination, but most of what drives us to create these stories is the real world and the people who live in it.

Fiction is meant to mirror reality, but it’s ridiculous to suggest that it’s only a one-way street. That fiction in no way, shape, or form influences our reality? Or that it only works the other way around? With all due respect, that’s simply not true. No productive discourse can be had if we choose to ignore the truth and don’t come together (at least halfway) to tackle the real issues at hand. 

Okay, I think I’ll leave it off there! Thanks so much for reading. I expect this to be my last blog on any topic regarding Inuyasha in the near future. As much as I’ve looked forward to answering all of your asks and writing all the blogs I have over these past almost 5 months, I think it’s best if I spend some time away for now. With the sequel fast approaching, I’m doing what I always do: hoping for the best and preparing for the worst. I’ve met some amazing people along the way, that’s for sure. And who knows, maybe you’ll see me active in the tags sooner than we think. Until then, it’s been an absolute pleasure! Enjoy the sequel, all of you. 💜