#I’m in so much pain right now
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so right until the very last minute I was still ping ponging with it’s Helly it’s Helena and uhm… yeah. This just made the entire thing 300% more fucked up and I AM SO HERE FOR IT
#Helena babygirl what IS YOUR PROBLEM#'Irving's being mean because he’s lonely' girl be so for fucking real right now#and when Helly get’s the whole debriefing WHAT THE FUCK#tô passando mal#Helena’s completely bonkers that was so messed up#and I still love her what can a girl do but OUCH#I’m in so much pain right now#severance spoilers
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Love waking up in the middle of the night feeling like my stomach has flipped upside down.
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Dentistry is bullshit
I should not have to pay upward of 2000 dollars (it’s 4000 without my insurance) to get my goddamn tooth fixed.
I should not have to wait six months to have someone just LOOK at my tooth when I’m in pain to the point I’m near bawling at 3 am even after several pain killers.
God.
#I’m in so much pain right now#I can��t even sleep#I want to cry#dentists are Bullcrap#dentistry in America#healthcare is shit
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He's sensitive about that
[First] Prev <–-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#lan wangji#wwx contextualizing when the xue yang stuff happened via years post mortem is so morbidly funny to me#now that his ´secret’ (kept for…2 days tops) is ‘out’ he really says whatever he wants to#i mean. not like it’s any change from before. WWX traded acting fruity to talking about his body decomposing#That’s how it works in courtship right? Talking about each other’s tragic deaths *is* the next step…right?#I’m glad to finally have an oppertunity to draw soggy eyes lwj#the depth of pain trapped in his orbs….much to ponder about#lwj has always been a very sensitive boy. An Orchid boy if you will; won’t die so easily at neglect#but needs special care to truly flourish#Oh! Happy comic number 50!#I’m proud of myself for getting this far B*) thank you to everyone who’s been along for the ride! heres to 100 more!
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I’m the happiest I’ve ever been in my life and. I just feel like crying over that fact. a few years ago I was sure I’d be an anxious miserable wreck for my entire life but now I wake up and I love the world and I promise one day you will too. please keep going please hold the world tight. you will giggle at something silly with a stranger. a staff member at a place you frequent will smile when they see you. an elderly person will look at you gratefully for helping them. you’ll cry about stupid stuff and laugh about it later. you’ll drink cold water during a hot day and it will be the best sensation ever. being alive is the best thing I’ve ever experienced.
#WWWAAUUUGGHGH#IM VERY EMOTIONAL. I love living I love the earth I love my friends so much#it was. so bad a few years ago#panic attacks every other day. miserable most of the time. unhealthy habits. every day felt like a bad day#but then I managed to get out of an awful situation. and I made an effort to try and love the place I live now as WELL as being homesick *#* for my home country. and I fought to notice the little things. and I went outside even when I haaated the idea of it#and now???? I’m still disabled. I still have anxiety. I’m not yet back in my home country#but my god I’m so happy in life. it does get better. everyone was right#even though I experience severe chronic pain on the daily. even though I live somewhere noisy and hot and crowded.#life is silly that way :3 I promise it gets better. it’s so cliche and it never sounds true but it is. it is#hopepunk
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When I grow up I wanna be like Yona. Just absolute devastation. Won’t take any bs from anyone trying to hurt her family.
I love her so much
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#imagine being so cool at age 16#like I’m 19 and I’m not that cool#she already bodied a man in one shot and now she’s just taking names and collecting body bags#I love her so much#I’m rereading for the fun times#because right now it’s just pain#akatsuki no yona#akayona#yona of the red dawn#yona of the dawn#yona#princess yona#akatsuki no yona manga spoilers
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This is one of many posts I have planned on electricity. For this post specifically, I’m touching on the lack of autonomy the puppets have, and the unhealthy coping mechanisms and regression they fall into. If you listen closely, duck and red are talking about stain edwards, specifically how they had been used as a replacement for duck, in the background while yellow is preparing to climb the staircase. Considering the bigger boys actions later on in the episode, this feels more significant than just a joke or a piece of background dialogue (it probably is, just bear with me for the sake of over analysis). It’s a detail I don’t see brought up often, but an interesting one nonetheless. Not just because it’s funny, but because it serves as insight for what’s to come. This conversation is barely audible as yellow stares up into the black abyss above him. A divide between the trio is set up here, they are not on the same page. As yellow scales the staircase, base level red and duck fiddle with electricity. Theres a lack of care for the objects, or even living things around them showcasing that have that potential to do worse like the big and bigger boys. On a smaller scale, yes, but there’s a colder quality to the scene. Electracy warns them that what they’re doing is too much, but they are ignored. This ultimately leads to the power outage, spurred on by the two’s reckless over usage of electricity
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The limited use of technology, and by contrast overconsumption is intentional, as it showcases a real lack of freedom. The puppets are stuck in a cycle regardless of what they do. They desperately want to feel in control of something even if it’s trivial. When they’re not doing that, the trio find themselves waiting for things like having access to a computer once a year. It’s worth noting that Colin is an older model of computer, as is pretty much every other piece of technology in the house. Interestingly, the trio do actually own a laptop, which is a lot more modern in appearance. They are never seen doing anything with it however. The few things that do take on a more modern appearance are either unusable or serve as a distraction. So the choice of duck having a hand held device in the void feels significant. It’s almost like a reminder to the audience that in theory, knowledge is right outside of their grip but they will never have it. Everything they do is limited.
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The fridge scene is a rare moment where we see the puppets speak their genuine feelings, no strings attached. Not at all one sided or hollow. Duck and Red sit beside each other in the fridge scene knowing this is not something they’re allowed to have, but you can tell they want to scoot closer. They live in an unforgiving routine where the mere act of looking at each other feels like rebellion. They’re something more tangible and warm than their bigger counterparts, even if through skin made of cheap felt and faux fur. Compare this to the cold emptiness of the big and bigger boys and how duck and red seem to grow further apart despite always being paired together. Even if they’re sitting at a similar length in both rooms, the bigger boys seem to be magnetically pulled apart rather than together. The big boys sit side by side with their limbs tangled, in defiance maybe, but they don’t question their environment anymore and the walls have gotten smaller. The bigger boys live in a pseudo- futuristic prison. They have become the technology seen being fiddled with before. They play into each other’s antics, but lack any real emotion which greatly upsets yellow once he comes across them. He watches as they poke and prod at a suspiciously stain edwards shaped hunk of meat as their only source of entertainment, thinking that this is as good as it gets. Technology prodding at flesh. A parallel between Stain Edwards and the puppets can be drawn here.
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Stain Edwards, in their initial appearance clearly craves more in life, but their sole purpose is to be moldable, to be shaped into anything the hands that grasp them want them to be. The trio are the same way, though they don’t know it. They’re obviously not aware of their true situation, but each of them have their own level of awareness, albeit in different areas, but that’s a different post for a different time. Red and duck comply and mold to their environments out of fear, a fear of losing that false sense of control. So, the bigger boys become the perpetrators of violence. They let bitterness consume them until they’re unrecognizable. Their egos get the better of them, fully encompassing them and leaving nothing but mechanical empty husks behind. Red and Duck are tricked into believing they’re in control, when in reality they’ve dug themselves into an even deeper hole than before. They expect yellow to join them, as this is just the way things are, and this horrifies him. Here before him are creatures that sound vaguely like his friends but in a completely unrecognizable form. Ultimately, no matter what form they take on, yellow’s urge to search for answers will always scare them. Yellow’s batteries means change, and change means bad things will happen. No more false sense of control. Yellow literally has his awareness stolen from him time and time again through his batteries. Without them, not only can’t he properly articulate himself, but he also can’t remember what happened before.
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Yellow loves his friends, he knows that they’re flawed, and he can’t help but scale back down the staircase time and time again to help them. They’re all he has. He knows that they’re smart to an extent, but is that enough? Will they be able to handle it this time? I think he knows the answer to this already, though he desperately wants it not to be true. He knows that it’s not their fault that they get like this, but also maybe it is. Because truthfully the two like to let it get worse. Yellow sees the good in Duck and red and he wants them to do better, even if his efforts are in vain. Because the puppets do not have autonomy. He shreds the book because he can’t bear a reality where his friends don’t love him, but also because that’s where his strings are pulling him to begin with. He looks to duck as he does so knowing it will make him happy, as if to say he’s not wrong anymore. All he ever wants is to please him. Truthfully, that book had nothing that could truly help them , as such a thing doesn’t exist. Still there’s that small thought in the back of his mind that it could, and ultimately he chooses his friends over knowledge every time. It was never his choice to begin with. It was inevitably going to end this way, and a small part of yellow knows that, even if he can’t express it. The puppets are prisoners here, prisoners to another prisoner. She too participates in the same routines everyday, she too has strings that hold her back, but that’s a post for another day.
#dhmis#dhmis analysis#yellow guy dhmis#red guy dhmis#duck dhmis#fluffybird#i have so many drafts that i have to finish LOL#like SO many#over thirty to be exact….#anyways forcing myself to post one because autistic burnout is killing me right now.#this isn’t super organized but i don’t really care.#i have at least ten drafts about electricity specifically right now so expect more soon.#anyways here’s my contribution for today#red and duck being disgustingly npd coded (me coded)#its like actually painful to watch#literally just a mirror image#they make each other so much worse LMFAO#gonna try to make these posts a regular thing#as like an early new years resolution#i’m gonna have a lot more time after this semester because i’m taking one off for my mental health#so expect more in the future.#ignore the messy autistic burnout format of this post
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my appointment with my chronic pain specialist left me in tears… is anyone remotely surprised
#i get that nerve damage is really difficult to treat in general#but it’s just so defeating to be told time and time again that little can be done when i experience nerve pain from the waist down#it effects everything i do#and i am in this cruel cycle of my exhaustion being bone-deep#but ironically being in too much pain to fall asleep#or stay asleep for more than 4 hours in a row#anyway i’m going to get a treat and listen to some music to try and decompress#my heart is just really heavy right now#personal
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MY LOVELY AND BEAUTIFUL FAMILY 😭💖💝💕💗🩷💘💝💞💗
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#i’m genuinely crying right now you guys my chest hurts#LOOK AT THAT SMILE#HE IS BEAMING#HE LOVES BAM SO MUCH#GOD MAKE THE PAIN STOP
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just as i suspected i hated today
#yelling into the void#i’m venting don’t look#too many thoughts too many feelings#i knew from the second i opened my eyes how today was going to go and i hate that i was right#still haven’t been able to get my pain under control 👍🏻 cool cool cool#all i have been able to think about all day is how much easier this day would have been if i had a good partner and that’s a scary thought#well for me at least#i’m so sick of dealing with this all on my own but the idea of asking someone to be with me when i’m like this makes me want to vomit#okay i’m done complaining now
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Bunny in danger!
The Chain leave Bunny somewhere safe to clear a monster camp on their trail. Despite Wild’s assurances, Bunny isn’t so safe after all.
@thatonecrazysidekick @tiredgaytheatrekid pssst more Bunny! (I’m sorry)
TW for blood and injury.
✦ . ⁺ . ✦ . ⁺ . ✦ . ⁺ . ✦ . ⁺ . ✦ . ⁺ .
Black sand exploded around him, and with half his group of monsters disintegrated, Hyrule had a second to breathe before the final four pounced all at once. A spear cut a fierce gash into his right arm, blood dribbling from the wound and staining his dark sleeve. Another nicked him on the calf. A third, he grabbed by the shaft and twisted out of the monster’s hands, relishing in the way its eyes widened in alarm before he shoved the weapon back into its owner’s stomach, the monster crumbling into black sand.
A high squeal, that fiery protectiveness within his chest swelling, forcing him to look up in time to see Bunny slam into a tree with a sharp shriek. Hyrule’s heart jumped into his throat as the little pink rabbit crashed to the ground in a heap. He didn’t move.
The fourth lizalfos took advantage of the distraction and sent its spear through the back of his thigh. Pain turned his vision white and Hyrule stumbled, the spear sticking out from the front of his leg, blood trailing down his thigh in dark rivulets. Then, he caught sight of that tiny bundle of pink fur, of a lizalfos stalking over to it, a fierce bite wound in its arm, and a wave of blistering fury and golden desire to protect flooded his mind. The air around him crackled.
“Don’t touch him!” A sharp snap of his fingers, and then dozens of bolts of lightning slammed into the ground all around him, turning the world white. The ground shook and lizalfos shrieked in terror, the sounds cut off swiftly.
And then the lightning was gone, leaving behind seven stunned heroes, their hair frizzy and wild and their eyes wide. Hyrule paid them no mind, nor did he feel the normal drain such a significant spell would cause or the spear still embedded in his thigh; he frantically hobbled over to Bunny, kneeling alongside him and gritting his teeth as the spear in his thigh shifted, his vision swimming alarmingly.
“Bunny!” His hands were already glowing a tender pink, healing magic at the ready, and he pressed them against Bunny, closing his eyes as his magic sought out the wounds his little friend had accumulated. His magic pulsed in response, a warning he ignored as he trickled more into Bunny’s still form.
“Traveller, your leg!” Wild had joined him at some point. Hyrule hadn’t noticed, when the edges of his vision were blurry, his ears roaring with blood. Now, his veins began to boil. “You need to—”
He turned to Wild, teeth bared. “You said he would be safe!”
Wild’s eyes widened and he flinched back as if Hyrule had struck him. “I…”
“Look at him! He almost died because of you! This is your fault!”
“I—I’m—” Wild’s eyes glistened now, and Hyrule found the flames were only stoked by the sight.
Before he could snap anything more, Twilight pushed himself between them. “Enough!” he hissed, pushing Wild away. “Take a walk, Cub.”
“B—but, I—”
“I know,” Twilight said, gentler than Hyrule thought Wild deserved. “We’ll talk later. I’ll take over.”
Wild nodded shakily, scurried away before Hyrule could say any more.
#Hyrule doesn’t mean anything he said btw#he’s angry and upset and scared and in a LOT of pain#he won’t let Bunny out of his sights easily after this#when he crashes Bunny sneaks away though#(to sit with Sky while he plays his harp. Bunny is sad after this)#Hyrule and Wild will be having a talk about this dw#these two are besties in every universe no matter what it takes to get there#I love them so much#it’s so hot here right now so I’m posting more Bunny early to distract myself from the miserable heat#I want to keep writing but it’s too hot :(#first Wild POV and I can’t even keep writing… curse you Australia and your fierce summer#please manifest us some rain if you see this the fire threats are real…#lu#loz#lu pink bunny au#linked universe#lu fic#linked universe fanfic#faye writes#lu Bunny#lu hyrule#lu wild#lu twilight#tw blood#tw injury#I’m going to try take a nap now wish me luck#oh also Hyrule is fine#he gets two potions in him after the spear is painfully removed and Twi carries him (Hyrule still carries Bunny)
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OKAY I have missed counseling 3 times in a row and I really need to process some stuff so this is me celebrating some TEACHING WINS as of late because things have been really hard!
—More writing is happening! More revisions of writing are happening. The gap between student writing being automatically boring, processed, disconnected from any actually thought and interesting, thoughtful writing—writing as a way OF thinking and sorting through thoughts in a logical way—is closing. Or at least narrowing.
—Classroom procedures are in place and I have to do very little to enforce them. There is (generally speaking) order in each classroom and the students’ habits, not my nagging, keep them in place.
—I am filling class time better and more effectively. There’s more variety in the structure of each class but also the time is just used better. They work bell to bell. In-between spaces are filled with review, oral work, discussions.
—Day to day work with the written text is becoming more specific. Tasks have been created in connection with a work that grew organically out of my teaching of them. There are more of these as a way to keep students paying attention to the reading/note taking. But the broad strokes, the chances to pause and discuss and see the bigger picture, are still happening. I’m starting to see the way the two layers and approaches work together to lift most of the students into an understanding of the story.
—There is still room for fun. Both in the specific sense—there are a few more games, review opportunities, creative exercises and chances to explore and engage with the text in a fun, non-academic way than there where before —but also in the very specific Maria way where I let my passion and knowledge for the work really show and carry them up on a wave, so to speak. This keeps the students interested, intrigued, and anxious not to miss one of the moments of fun.
—I feel like I’m reaching a more complete approach that tackles the basic skills of all my classes—reading, interpreting, discussing, writing—more evenly. Their opportunities to do all of those things is better balanced and woven together than it has been. The opportunity to practice each thing recurs and recurs again so that their sense of how to actually DO a thing—at least by my measurement of it—is improving.
—The specific qualities that I want to bring to each class are growing more distinct. My 8th graders vocabularies are expanding as is their grammar. My sophomores are establishing surer connections with outside scholarly voices on each of the texts we read which help them jumpstart actual independent thinking and interpreting. And my seniors are given the chance to connect the readings to their own lives and most importantly current concerns more than they used to.
I think that’s it :))))
#there is some emotional thread this year that is so painful. and idk exactly what it is#but I am sad! and missing something#and that’s why I have to make myself look at what I have built#and invested a lot of energy into building#and see (objectively!) that it’s working!#but I guess I do feel in my heart of hearts that I am missing some of the magic of last year#but you know what. I said that to Nina last night and she said ‘so far. there’s not much magic so far’#and maybe she’s right. I have to wait and see if some of the things I have planted will yield results and give them time to do so#but anyway yeah. I needed to do the objective data gathering#thanks for listening! sorry it reads like a report#teaching tag#imagine if my students found this and were like ‘lol incorrect’#anyways like today was so good and I was so full of energy but now I’m so tired and just—#blegh
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The gang’s all here!! They’re on the case!! And there’s no ghost that they wouldn’t chase!!!!!
@mysticalcats’s Foxglove, @toki-toro’s Chaumet, @emimii’s Clownaire, and my own Bluebelle :)
#this was indeed the project I was working on lmao#WHY DID THIS TAKE 17 BILLION YEARSSSSSS#I actually rly like how the actual paint turned out#ESPECIALLY FOR FOXGLOVE SQUEEEEE#he looks so cute….and I got all the colors mixed for Chaumet#watercolor oc painting: 1#back paint neck pain headache pain: 0#no but sketching this took such! a long! time!#I just straight up could not get foxglove and bluebelle right it was maddening#but I persisted and I beat the odds‼️‼️ Yipee‼️‼️#I love all of these guys so so so much I’ll prolly never stop thinking about them#please never stop talking about your ocs ever#and I am working on being coherent about Bluebelle as we speak!!!!#I got an idea and now I’m trying to make my brain not be mean about it#literally just chanting to myself ‘YOU! CAN MAKE! IT AS WEIRD!! AS! YOU WANT!!!’#shoutout to my fairytales throughout that ages book for inspiring me#100 points and a drawing of your choice if you can figure out the story Bluebelle’s backstory is based on lmao#ANYHOW#I just be rambling in these tags I perhaps need to calm down lol#I LOVE YALLS OCS FOREVER AND EVER!!!!#clownaire was literally perfect from the start I NAILED his pose first try and then he was very supportive the rest of the way through#live laugh love 🫶🫶🫶💐💐💐🩰🩰🩰#next up: Jemima painting!! with two special guests!!!#oh shit those are a lot of tags uhhhh I’m done now i promise 🫶🫶#cats the musical#cats musical#cats oc#jellicle oc#sorah’s silly scribbles#(also the text right under the drawing are a Scooby doo song LMAO it’s called Dig It Scooby Doo it’s insanely catchy)
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Every JRWI pc can have chronic pain just as a little treat for me
#jrwi#jrwi thoughts#chip yes#Gillion yes#Jay yes#Dakota yes#William yes#Vyncent yes#Ashe yes#Rand yes#Kian yes#rolan yes#Arthur yes#I’m in so much pain right now so I’m my mind we’re all in the same boat
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my tummy hurts and I want to cry does anyone have any period comfort Rafe fic recs?
#rafe cameron#obx#periodblogging#I’m actually in so much pain right now like fuckk#help a girl out pls#rafe cameron x reader#obx fanfiction
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