#I’m going to be going to bed tonight laying on my side and thinking about this fml
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hard to sleep — c.s ⋅˚₊‧ 𝜗𝜚 ‧₊˚ ⋅
in which . . . you and chris can’t seem to fall asleep after you both argue.
warnings . . . resolved angst, arguing, yelling, crying.
written by @delilahsturniolo. do not copy, steal, or modify any of my works. do not take inspiration without permission or credits. happy reading! :)
tonight had been a total mess, there was no doubt about it. you and chris never argued, but when you did it usually was dumb and small, you’d usually laugh it off with him and apologize. however, this time was different. it was more…intense. you hadn’t meant to get into a screaming match with your boyfriend, it just happened.
chris had never yelled at you before, it was an odd situation for you to be in. all of this was happening out of anger, and stress from the day. deep down, you knew he didn’t mean anything he was saying, but it still hurt like a knife twisting cruelly in your heart, slowly ripping all the life and emotion away from you as you stood there.
“I can’t believe you!” chris scoffed, running his hand through his hair in frustration as you leaned against the kitchen counter.
“what can’t you believe, chris? you barely even spend time with me anymore!” you matched his frustrated tone, your voice rising.
your comment seemed to hit him harder than you thought it would. “is that what this is about? you think i don’t care about you? you’re fuckin’ wrong, you need to grow up and realize i have a job that requires me to be away!” chris spoke in anger, his fists clenched by his sides.
“you aren’t listening to me! i wake up and you’re gone, i go to sleep without you next to me because you’re always working! and when you’re home you don’t fucking acknowledge me!” you yelled.
chris quickly lost his patience with you. “stop it, just stop it. while you’re over here actin’ like a spoiled brat, i’m working my ass off and trying to make you happy! you sit around this house all day and complain!” you bit your lip, your heart sinking at his words. nothing felt real, absolutely nothing.
the corner’s of your eyes were quick to fill with tears, chris’s gaze softened as he looked into your hurt eyes. you sniffled, wiping your tears with your sleeve in aggression.
“fine then! i’ll get out of your way.” you replied in frustration, walking away before chris could even stop you. you were done, you just wanted to end the day, you wanted all of this to just be over.
chris sighed softly, his breaths coming out shaky as he watched you run upstairs before you could break down in front of him. he felt horrible, especially because he was seeing the woman he loved most cry. but he couldn’t talk to you right now, he had to let his anger boil over.
about an hour had passed since you and chris argued. you were laying in bed, the lamp on your side table casting a warm and dim light into the room. the house was silent, you weren’t sure what chris was doing at the moment. you laid on your side, your head buried into your tear soaked blanket as your soft sniffles were muffled.
the silence after an argument was always the worst, considering the fact that you had fought with the man you loved most. you let out a soft sob into your pillow, your thoughts racing through your mind rapidly.
suddenly, the door to the room opened. chris walked in, not even batting you an eye. you watched as he stumbled over to his closet in exhaustion, changing into a plain white shirt and blue plaid pajama pants.
chris shut off the lamp on the side table, climbing in bed next to you while still creating a small gap of distance between the both of you, as he was still slightly frustrated, but not as much as before. you could feel the tension between the two of you in the atmosphere of the room, it took everything in you not to break the silence.
chris laid with his back facing you, his breaths were heavy as his body was completely still. you stared up at the ceiling, tossing and turning with restlessness. you couldn’t sleep at all, especially knowing that chris was angry with you.
chris laid awake, although he refused to face you. he listened to your restless tossing and turning on the bed, and your frustrated grunts. he was in the same boat, he couldn’t shut his eyes and rest without thinking of the overwhelming amount of guilt he felt from earlier. he knew you both couldn’t go to bed angry with each other, it wasn’t right.
chris sighed softly, turning over on the bed to look at you through the dark room. “baby?” he called out for you, his voice as gentle as ever, contrast to his anger earlier. you tensed up as you could feel his eyes on you as he waited for an answer.
“y-yeah?” you answered, your voice barely above a whisper. chris gently touched your arm, slowly beginning to turn you over so he could get a proper look at you.
the both of you locked eyes, chris felt his heart sink by just looking at the guilt and regret in your eyes, the same eyes that had such a bright and contagious spark inside of them, were now dull and sad.
“you okay?” he asked, his hand coming up to your face, brushing a strand of hair out of your eyes. you nodded, leaning into his touch, you felt a sense of comfort knowing that he still loved and cared about you despite everything.
“i’m sorry sweetheart, i’m so sorry. i shouldn’t have yelled at you. i shouldn’t have said all those mean things, you didn’t deserve that.” chris apologized, your heart felt warm as you listened to what he had to say.
“i’m sorry too, chris. i know you care about me, and i appreciate you for that, i’m sorry for doubting you and raising my voice at you.” you spoke, chris gently wiped your stray tears, leaning into you and pressing a soft kiss to your forehead.
“it’s okay, love. i just want you to talk to me about these things instead of keeping it to yourself, okay? i’m here for you, i want to know how you’re feeling. i can’t help you if i don’t know what’s going on.” chris explained to you.
“i promise, i’ll try to communicate with you more.” you agreed, a smile formed on chris’s face as you guys were now on the same page.
“and i promise i’ll try to make more time for you, and listen to you.” chris added on, you nodded. chris gently wrapped his arms around you securely, you buried your head into his chest, holding onto him tightly, as if he’d disappear if you let go. chris looked down at you as you began to slowly drift off in his arms. he whispered a small “i love you” before covering the both of you with the blanket and falling asleep himself, feeling reassured that you were safe in his arms.
it wasn’t so hard to sleep when you were in his arms.
© delilahsturniolo do not copy, re use, or modify any of my works.
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#sturniolo triplets#the sturniolo triplets#sturniolo triplets angst#chris sturniolo angst#chris sturniolo#sturniolo fanfic#sturniolo x reader#chris sturniolo fanfic#chris sturniolo imagine#chris sturniolo x reader#chris x y/n#chris x reader#sturniolo angst#angst#christopher sturniolo#sturniolo x you#sturniolo#sturniolo triplets fanfic#sturniolo fandom#fanfic#sturniolo imagine#sturniolo triplets x reader#sturniolo triplets x you
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“Back to Black.”
Jihyo x Fem!Reader
Chapter 9-12
Other chapters here:
tw: fluff, angst, physical violence, abuse, blackmail(?), cursing, rumors, ceo!jihyo x model!reader, arranged marriage, enemies to lovers.
—
Jihyo carefully ran the bath, testing the water with her fingers to make sure it was just the right temperature. The steam curled softly in the air, fogging the mirror as she adjusted the knobs. The night had left her strangely unsettled, a mix of emotions swirling within her as she stole a glance back at the bedroom where you lay.
You were stretched out on her bed, half-asleep, the tension of the evening melting into exhaustion. Your breathing was slow, and the sight of you like that—so peaceful, so vulnerable—made Jihyo’s chest tighten. She turned back to the bath, shaking her head at herself.
Her phone buzzed on the counter, pulling her from her thoughts. She sighed, her shoulders drooping as she picked it up.
Sana.
Her lips pressed into a thin line as she opened the messages.
“Where are you?”
“I miss you.”
“I need your lips on me.”
Jihyo stared at the words for a moment, her stomach twisting—not with longing, but with annoyance. She hesitated, then typed a short response:
“I’m busy.”
The response only seemed to fuel Sana’s persistence.
“Don’t ignore me, Jihyo.”
“Is this about Y/N?”
“You know I’m better for you. Just come over. Let me remind you.”
Jihyo closed her eyes, her jaw tightening as she gripped the phone. Her finger hovered over the screen before she locked it, setting it down face-down on the counter. She didn’t need this right now—not tonight.
She turned back to the bath, carefully shutting off the water and wiping her damp hands on a towel. With a deep breath, she pushed aside the weight Sana’s messages brought and focused on you.
Walking into the bedroom, she knelt down beside you, her fingers brushing lightly against your shoulder. “Hey,” she said softly, her voice coaxing. “The bath’s ready.” You let out a tired groan, burying your face further into her pillow. “I don’t wanna move…”
Jihyo chuckled, the sound warm and low. “You’ll thank me once you’re in there. Trust me.” She gently tugged at your arm, her touch steady but patient. Reluctantly, you let her help you up, leaning against her as you shuffled toward the bathroom. “You’re so annoying,” you muttered, your words muffled by sleep.
“And yet, you keep letting me take care of you,” she teased, her hand resting at the small of your back as she guided you. The moment you stepped into the warm water, a soft sigh escaped your lips. The heat seemed to wrap around you, melting away the tension in your muscles. Jihyo knelt by the side of the tub, resting her chin on her folded arms as she watched you settle in.
“What?” you asked, catching her gaze. She smiled faintly, her eyes soft. “You just… You look so calm. I like seeing you like this.” You let out a small laugh, closing your eyes. “You’re staring again.”
“Can you blame me?” she murmured, her voice so quiet it almost blended with the sound of the water. You opened one eye, studying her. “You’re being weird tonight. What’s going on in that head of yours?” her eyebrows furrowed “What do you mean by that?”. You leaned your head back, “I mean, you’re not insulting me or making my life a living hell, what’s up with that?” For a moment, she hesitated, her lips parting like she was about to say something significant. Instead, she reached out, brushing a damp strand of hair from your face. “I was just thinking… about you. About us.”
The weight of her words made your heart flutter. “Us?” you echoed, your voice soft. She nodded slowly, her gaze never leaving yours. “You’re different, Y/N. In a good way. A really good way.”
Her words caught you off guard, leaving you unsure of how to respond. Before you could find the right words, her phone buzzed again from the counter. Jihyo’s face hardened as she stood, her shoulders tense. “I’ll be right back.” You watched her leave, a small ache blooming in your chest. Alone, you sank further into the water, the warmth now doing little to soothe the unease that crept into your thoughts.
Out in the other room, Jihyo grabbed her phone, glaring at the screen. She answered with a clipped tone, “What do you want, Sana?”
“Finally,” Sana’s voice came through the line, smooth and self-assured. “You’ve been ignoring me all night.”
“I told you I’m busy,” Jihyo replied, her voice tight. “With Y/N?” Sana pressed, her tone shifting to something sharper. “You think they’re better than me? Different?”
“Sana, stop,” Jihyo said, pinching the bridge of her nose. “You know how this ends,” Sana continued, her voice softening to a manipulative lilt. “They’ll leave, Jihyo. They always do. But I’m still here. I’ll always be here.” Jihyo’s grip on the phone tightened. “Goodnight, Sana,” she said firmly, ending the call before Sana could respond.
She stood there for a moment, her heart pounding—not with doubt, but with frustration. She refused to let Sana’s words linger, refused to let them plant seeds of insecurity.
When she returned to the bathroom, you were resting against the edge of the tub, your eyes half-closed. You looked up at her, your expression soft but tinged with concern. “Everything okay?”
Jihyo’s expression softened instantly, and she knelt beside you again. “Yeah. Everything’s fine.” She helped you out of the tub, wrapping a towel around your shoulders. “I thought you were going to fall asleep in there,” she teased lightly. You laughed quietly, leaning into her touch. “Maybe I was.” As she led you back to the bedroom, you glanced at her, your voice hesitant. “What you said earlier… about me being different. What did you mean?”
Jihyo paused, her gaze locking with yours. Her lips parted, and for a moment, you thought she might finally say it. But instead, she smiled faintly. “It’s… complicated.” Your heart sank slightly at her deflection, but you didn’t push. Instead, you let her guide you back to bed, her touch gentle as she tucked you in.
And as she slipped in beside you, holding you close, you couldn’t shake the feeling that her silence carried more weight than her words ever could.
—
A sharp knock pierced the quiet of the night, drawing an irritated groan from your lips as you stirred in bed. You glanced at Jihyo, who remained unmoving, her breathing slow and steady as she slept, hoping she’d get up and answer it.
The knock came again, louder this time, dragging you out of your sleep with a groggy groan. Your eyes fluttered open, adjusting to the faint glow of moonlight filtering through the curtains. You glanced over at Jihyo, who was completely still, her soft breathing even and undisturbed.
“Of course,” you muttered under your breath, tossing the covers aside. The cold air pricked at your skin as you shuffled toward the door, your annoyance barely masked by your exhaustion.
The moment you opened it, the night air hit you—and so did the sight of Sana. Her smile stretched wide, but it wasn’t kind. It was sharp, calculated, with an edge that set your nerves on edge immediately.“Good,” she said, her voice smooth. “I was hoping you’d be the one to answer.”
Before you could even question her presence, her hand shot out, gripping your wrist. “Come on,” she said, pulling you outside with surprising force. “Let’s have a little chat.”
“Sana, what the hell—” Her nails dug into your skin, silencing your protest as she dragged you onto the porch. The night was quiet save for the occasional rustle of leaves, but there was nothing calm about the way she was staring at you. “What do you want?” you asked, your voice barely hiding your irritation. “What do I want?” she echoed, her smile turning colder. “I want to know what exactly is going on between you and Jihyo. What are you to her? ”
You froze, her question catching you off guard. “That’s none of your business,” you said cautiously, trying to pull your wrist free, but her grip only tightened.“Oh, it’s absolutely my business,” she said, leaning in closer. “Have you two...been intimate?”. Your cheeks burned at the bluntness of her question, but you refused to give her the satisfaction of a reaction. “Why does that matter?” you managed, your voice firmer now.
Her laugh was bitter, almost mocking. “It matters because Jihyo is mine. She has always been mine. And I don’t care what little fairytale you’ve convinced yourself of, but this...this thing between you two? It ends now.”
“Sana, you need to leave,” you said, trying to sound firm, but the tension in your voice betrayed your unease.Her nails dug deeper into your wrist, making you wince. “Oh, you think I’m just going to walk away? Not a chance. I don’t think you understand who you’re fucking dealing with, Y/N.”
You glared at her, frustration bubbling to the surface. “And I don’t think you understand that Jihyo isn’t some possession for you to claim.” Her smile faltered for a moment, but then it returned, sharper than before. “Oh, sweetheart,” she said, her voice dripping with venom. “Jihyo might not say she’s mine, but I know her better than you ever will. She comes back to me every time. And when she does, where will that leave you?”
You tried to keep your composure, but her words stung.“I’m not afraid of you,” you said, though your voice wavered slightly. She chuckled darkly. “You should be. Because I don’t just make threats—I follow through. I will destroy everything you have, everything you care about. Your reputation? Gone. Your little facade of confidence? Shattered. And no one will even remember your name when I’m done.”
Her words felt like a slap, but you refused to let her see how much they affected you. “You’re pathetic,” you said quietly. “Trying to control someone who clearly doesn’t want to be with you. It’s all forced, it’s all business.” Her eyes flashed with anger, and her grip on your wrist tightened to the point of pain. “Don’t test me,” she hissed. “I’ve let you play your little game for long enough. This is your one and only warning: stay away from Jihyo. If you don’t, I’ll make sure you regret it.”
Her voice was low and dangerous, each word hitting like a dagger. You could see the obsession in her eyes, the possessiveness that twisted her features into something cruel and unrecognizable. “Sana, you need help,” you said softly, your voice steady despite the fear creeping into your chest. Her laugh was hollow. “Help? Oh, sweetheart, I don’t need help. You do. Because you have no idea what the fuck you’ve gotten yourself into.”
She finally released your wrist, and you stumbled back, cradling your arm where her nails had left deep, red indentations.
“Remember this,” she said, her tone icy. “Jihyo is mine. And if you think for a second that you can change that, you’re even more foolish than I thought.” With that, she turned on her heel and walked away, leaving you standing there in the cold, her threats echoing in your mind. You closed the door slowly, leaning against it as your body trembled—not just from the cold, but from the weight of everything she’d said. You glanced down at your wrist, the faint marks serving as a cruel reminder of her venomous words.
As you made your way back to the bedroom, your steps were heavy with doubt. You looked at Jihyo, still sleeping soundly, her features soft and peaceful in the moonlight. For a brief moment, you let yourself wonder—was Sana right? But then you shook your head, pushing the thought away. Whatever was between you and Jihyo, it was real. You had to believe that.
Strategy 1: The Morning After
Sunlight streamed softly into the room, illuminating the scattered clothes on the floor and the faint rise and fall of Jihyo’s chest as she slept beside you. For a fleeting moment, you allowed yourself to savor the quiet. Her arm was draped over your waist, her face buried in the crook of your neck.
You should’ve felt calm. Safe. But the unease that had been growing inside you for weeks gnawed at your chest like a dull ache.
Your phone buzzed harshly on the nightstand, breaking the fragile serenity of the morning. You reached for it quickly, careful not to wake Jihyo.
**Notification: "Rising Star Caught in Scandal—Leaked Photos Surface"**
Your heart sank as you opened your phone to a barrage of missed calls, texts, and notifications. The headlines were plastered across every major outlet. Fake photos. Accusations. Lies. Your name dragged through the mud.
“Y/N?” Jihyo’s groggy voice startled you. She sat up slowly, rubbing her eyes. “What’s going on?”
You hesitated, clutching the phone in your hands. “It’s nothing,” you murmured, but your voice betrayed you.
Her brow furrowed as she reached for her own phone. Her face hardened as she read the notifications, her once-soft expression replaced with something colder. “What the hell is this?”
“I don’t know!” you exclaimed, sitting up. “It’s not true, Jihyo. I didn’t do any of this.”
She didn’t answer right away. Instead, she stared at her screen, scrolling through the headlines. “Do you have any idea how bad this looks?”
“Of course, I do!” you snapped, the panic in your voice growing. “But it’s not real! Someone—someone’s doing this to me.”
Her jaw clenched, and she stood up from the bed, running a hand through her hair. “You need to fix this. Immediately.”
The coldness in her tone stung more than you cared to admit. “Do you even believe me?” you asked softly, your voice barely above a whisper.
Jihyo paused, her lips parting as if to say something, but she shook her head instead. “I don’t know what to think, Y/N. I really don’t.”
---
Strategy 2: The Press Conference
Hours later, you were seated at a long table in front of dozens of reporters. The flashing lights from their cameras made your head pound, and their relentless questions felt like daggers.
“Y/N, over here!” a man called out. “Do you deny the allegations?”
“Is it true you tried to sabotage your peers to climb the ranks?” a woman asked, her voice laced with contempt.
You leaned into the microphone, gripping its base tightly to keep your hands from shaking. “These accusations are false,” you said, your voice cracking slightly. “The photos and messages were fabricated. I don’t know who’s behind this, but I would never—”
“Then how do you explain the evidence?” another reporter cut you off. “Are you saying the media is lying?”
“I’m saying someone is targeting me,” you said, your voice firm this time. “This isn’t the truth.”
“But why would someone go to these lengths unless there was some truth to it?” a younger reporter pressed.
You felt the walls closing in, the weight of their stares suffocating. “I—I can’t answer that,” you admitted, your voice faltering.
Momo sat beside you, her gaze sharp as she leaned forward. “This press conference is over,” she announced, standing. “We’ll issue an official statement later. No further questions.”
The reporters shouted over one another as you were escorted out.
Final Blow: The ballroom.
The grand ballroom was dazzling, filled with industry elites dressed to the nines. You wore a designer gown that hugged your frame perfectly, but you felt exposed, like every pair of eyes was dissecting you.
Jihyo walked beside you, her arm brushing yours, but the warmth you usually felt was gone. The space between you was more than physical—it was a chasm of doubt and unspoken words.
As you entered the room, the whispers started.
“Is that her?”
“Did you see the headlines?”
“She doesn’t even look ashamed.”
You kept your chin high, ignoring the sting of their words. Jihyo’s hand briefly grazed the small of your back as she guided you to your seats.
The event unfolded smoothly at first. But as the lights dimmed and the massive screen lit up, your heart stopped.
The screen displayed the necklace—the one that had caused so much trouble in your rookie days. Then came the photos: the broken pieces, the argument, and finally, the fake messages framing you as the saboteur.
The gasps from the crowd were deafening.
You turned to Jihyo, desperate to explain, but the look on her face shattered you. Her eyes glistened with unshed tears, her lips pressed into a trembling line.
“I thought I could trust you,” she said, her voice barely audible over the murmurs. “It really was you.”
“No,” you whispered, shaking your head. “It wasn’t me. You have to believe me.”
Her shoulders slumped as she took a step back. “Don’t. Just don’t.”
The weight of her words crushed you. Your breath hitched, and you looked around the room, the stares cutting into you like knives. That’s when you saw her—Sana, standing near the back, a satisfied smile on her lips.
Everything clicked.
You clenched your jaw, your fists trembling at your sides, but the humiliation was too much. You turned and bolted out of the ballroom, the voices of reporters and attendees chasing after you.
“Y/N, care to comment?”
“Is this the end of your career?”
“Do you regret what you’ve done?”
The words blurred together as tears clouded your vision. You barely noticed Momo pulling up outside the venue. She leapt out of the car, shoving past the paparazzi to reach you. “Get in the car,” she snapped, her voice firm but protective.
Once inside, you collapsed against her, sobbing into her shoulder.
“I can’t—I can’t do this anymore,” you choked out, your tears soaking her shirt.
Momo wrapped her arms around you tightly, her hand stroking your hair. “They don’t deserve you,” she muttered, her voice low and filled with rage. “Jihyo doesn’t deserve you. None of them do.”
Her words made you cry harder, your body trembling with the weight of everything.
Momo’s voice softened as she whispered, “I’m going to fix this. I don’t care what it takes. I’ll fix it.”
But deep down, you weren’t sure if anything could ever be fixed.
Nothing will.
The ride to Momo’s apartment had been quiet, save for the occasional sharp inhale you couldn’t stifle as you choked back tears. Momo had driven in near silence, glancing at you every so often, her jaw tight, her grip on the steering wheel firm.
When you finally arrived, Momo walked you to the guest bedroom without saying a word. As soon as the door shut behind you, it all came crashing down.
You collapsed onto the bed, burying your face into the pillows as the sobs tore from your chest. Your heart ached like it had been ripped apart, and your head pounded with every shuddering breath. You clutched at the fabric beneath you, trying to muffle your cries, but the pain was too much to contain.
Flashes of the past began to flood your mind. The yelling, the bruises, the punishment for every little mistake during your rookie days. The sharp sting of slaps across your face, the gut-wrenching humiliation when you didn’t meet expectations. You could still hear the cruel voices in your head:
"Fix your posture. Do it again. No, that’s wrong! Are you really this useless?"
You pulled at your hair in frustration, as if you could physically tear the memories out of your mind. The room felt like it was spinning, and your cries only grew louder.
Outside the door, Momo hesitated. You had locked it as soon as she left, and though she knocked gently a few times, you didn’t respond. “Y/N,” she called softly, her voice filled with concern. “I’m here if you want to talk, okay? Don’t keep it all in.”
But you didn’t answer. You couldn’t.
The next morning crept in sluggishly, though you hadn’t slept at all. Your eyes were red and swollen, your body felt like lead, and your throat ached from crying. You stared blankly at the ceiling, the sunlight streaming in through the curtains doing nothing to warm the icy knot in your chest.
Momo had left early for her part-time job, leaving you alone in the apartment. You were grateful for the solitude, though it did little to ease the storm inside you.
When a knock sounded at the front door, you assumed it was Momo returning because she’d forgotten something. Dragging yourself out of bed, you shuffled to the door and opened it cautiously.
Your heart sank.
There stood Sana, her lips twisted into a smug, almost predatory smile. Her presence was suffocating.
“What the hell are you doing here?” you asked, your voice hoarse and shaky.
Her smile widened. “I figured you’d be here. Jihyo always said this was your little safe haven. Funny, isn’t it? Running to Momo every time things get hard. Do you ever fight your own battles, or is hiding all you’re good at?”
You moved to close the door, but Sana was quicker. She slammed her hand against it, forcing it open with such strength that you stumbled backward.
“Don’t walk away from me,” she hissed, stepping inside and shutting the door behind her.
“What do you want?” you demanded, trying to mask the fear bubbling inside you.
“What I want,” she began, her voice dripping with venom, “is for you to get out of Jihyo’s life. You don’t deserve her. You never did.”
“You don’t know anything about me or Jihyo,” you snapped, but your voice faltered, betraying your unease.
Sana’s smile twisted into something cruel. “Oh, but I do. She tells me everything. About how needy you are, how much of a burden you’ve become. Did you really think she cared about you? God, you’re delusional.”
Your chest tightened, but you stood your ground. “Get out,” you said, your voice firmer this time.
Sana’s eyes narrowed, and before you could react, she grabbed your wrist, her nails digging into your skin. “You’re nothing but a pest, Y/N. A leech. Do you know how much better her life would be without you? You’re just dragging her down.”
You tried to pull away, but her grip tightened. “Let go of me,” you said, panic creeping into your tone.
“You don’t get it, do you?” she snarled, shoving you against the wall. The impact sent a sharp jolt of pain through your back. “She’ll never love you. You’re nothing to her. Nothing!”
The tears you’d been holding back threatened to spill, but you refused to let her see you break. “You’re insane,” you whispered.
“And you’re pathetic,” she shot back, knocking over a chair as she paced angrily around the room. “Do you even know why Jihyo hated you in the first place? Why everyone thought you were a conniving little bitch?”
Your breath hitched as she continued.
“That necklace,” she said, her voice dripping with malice. “You didn’t sabotage it. I did. I made sure it would all fall apart, and you were stupid enough to take the blame. And look at you now—still stupid, still a mess.”
The room fell silent. Her confession hung in the air like a bomb waiting to detonate.
“What did you just say?” you asked, your voice trembling.
Sana smirked, opening her mouth to respond, but a third voice cut through the tension.
“Sana.”
Both of you turned toward the door.
Jihyo stood there, her face pale, her eyes wide with a mix of disbelief and fury. In one hand, she held a bouquet of flowers and a box of chocolates, now crushed in her grip.
“Sana,” she repeated, her voice shaking. “You… you did this?”
Sana faltered, her confident facade cracking. “Jihyo, it’s not—”
“You lied to me,” Jihyo said, stepping forward. Her voice rose with each word, her anger palpable. “You manipulated me. You hurt her. And now you’re here? Doing this?”
“I did it for us!” Sana cried, desperation seeping into her tone. “Don’t you see? She’s ruining everything! You and I—”
“There is no ‘you and I,’” Jihyo snapped, shoving Sana back. “You’re fired. Don’t come near me. Don’t come near her. Ever again.”
Sana’s face twisted with rage, but she didn’t fight back. She cast one last hateful glare at you before storming out, slamming the door behind her.
As the door closed, Jihyo’s anger melted into something softer. She rushed to your side, her hands trembling as she cupped your face. “Are you okay?” she whispered, her voice breaking.
You couldn’t answer. The weight of everything was too much, and the tears you’d fought so hard to hold back finally spilled over.
Jihyo pulled you into her arms, holding you tightly as you sobbed into her shoulder.
“Y/N..” She spoke up.
(TO BE CONTINUED.)
#wlw#gxg#twice smut#twice x reader#kpop gg#kpop smut#kpop#smut#jihyo x fem reader#jihyo x you#jihyo angst#twice angst#angst#mini series
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hi ( ◜‿◝ )♡ i was wondering if it's okay to be a little bit feral about viktor here.,..,., craving him. Carnally
let’s get feral about viktor… general thots here and then a stupid blurb below the cut
would definitely be into face-sitting: pleasing his partner while laying back. hands free to roam and grope and you get to control the pace. you could grind on his nose and throw your head back and he just gets to listen as you squeal.
also would look so so so good covered in hickies….. purplish love bites decorating his sharp collarbones.. he’d probably let you get away with sucking some up his neck since he’s locked in the lab all day anyway
hngnnnggg he’s gotta be PENT up too. he’s handsome and he knows it, but he went from a studying assistant to a full scientist behind hextech so he pretty much capped himself on sex. so when he gets into it he is. INTO it. so needy and whiny and overstimulates himself to keep fucking you just so he doesn’t have to stop
i want him lol… not laughing
~~ 530 words
his careful and thoughtful inflection, each word he says wrought so particularly that no matter how big the words he uses are -you understand each one perfectly with how he uses it.
which is why you take so much pleasure in finding him tongue-tied next to you. pale cheeks flushing and eyes, so ragged with knowledge, wide chock full of curiosity. you’re sure he hasn’t gotten much attention -- no amount of beauty or charming accent can save a scientist from his own devotion.
he got dragged out to an exhibition gala by jayce and he’s been slick against the wall since arriving. no drink or plate in hand, he simply leans there in a bored silence. which is when the last person he wants to see arrives: you, the new assistant.
you spare no time before saddling up beside him with two champagne flutes. one has a dewy smear of gloss along the rim while you extend the other.
“any commitments tomorrow? or can i finally see the famed hextech let loose?”
viktor eyes the bubbles, dragging his gaze up to your face and halting there for an excruciating second before leaning to grab the glass.
“i was just thinking of leaving,” he admits, “these public showings are not my idea.”
“go figure. i think everyone here’s gathered that.”
“jayce can handle any questions of the evening…” viktor sighs, frowning down at the champagne, “sad that you wasted your time getting me the glass.”
“you know, i do wonder how many girls out in town dream about jayce. he’s the face -a pretty face- for hextech,” viktor raises a brow at you prodding for explanation, “i just don’t understand how they can overlook the brains.”
viktor jumps, gaze startling down to his feet, a stiff response already spilling, “jayce is half the brain, and so am i.”
“then i guess i just need to tell you that i think you’re cute.”
a flurry of excuses storms behind his eyes before he catches his breath, shoulders drooping as he exhales and realizes: he doesn’t have to find an excuse. he doesn’t have to refuse you at all.
he’s not working tonight. you’re not working. he can’t remember the last time he got to act like a normal man with normal desires rather than fulfilling some vague purpose. an idyllic achievement.
he could just be a man tonight.
so he clinks his glass against yours with a soft smile, “then i’m assuming you’re not busy tomorrow, either?”
“i am not,” you beam, sliding closer toward him.
and good thing; both of you having the next day off means you can pull viktor into your apartment, and then your bed. he lets you guide the night, watching with uncharacteristic amazement as you strip -- he looks so mesmerized his hands clench, itching to scale up your bare sides.
you swing a leg over him when he’s sat against your headboard, “you okay, vik?” he tilts his head only for you to cup his cheeks and keep his head straight, “you’re all flushed.”
“your forwardness,” he blinks up at you, heart thrumming between his ribs, “it scares me.”
“oh?”
“i’ve never been more aroused.”
“oh…”
… in another world i will write a viktor fic with this same premise… it is so. Interesting to me.
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Sleeping, Dancing and Mistletoe
Summary: Logan x Fe!Reader -> Times when people found evidence that you and Logan were possibly a couple, and the one time you both finally confirmed it.
Disclaimer: Mostly fluff, mentions/illusions to sex, Logan checking you out. Couple of swear words here and there. This has been unfinished in my drafts for at least a week so...yeah. This is finished. little Christmas at the end. Not Proof Read.
For what felt like the thirtieth time in the hour, you turned over with a huff and pressed your pillow to your ears, trying to muffle the sounds coming from next door.
And just as it finally died down, you sighed and was just about to thank some ancient being for hearing your prayers when…it started again.
“That’s it.”
Changing out of your longer pyjama bottoms and into some sleep shorts, you made your way out of your room, keeping your footsteps as quiet as you could until the noises faded away and you started to reach your intended room.
Opening up the door, you found exactly what you were looking for.
Shaking his shoulder as he lay on his stomach, you whispered his name, hoping he’d hear you.
“Logan.” You shook him for a third time. “Logan.”
Nothing.
With another sigh, you slapped his face gently and said his name once more, a little louder and firmer.
“Logan.”
Finally, he groaned. “What?”
His voice was muffled by his pillow but you could hear him just well enough. Or maybe you were just used to his grunts that they were starting to become their own language you could understand.
“Move over. I’m sleeping here tonight.”
“What’s wrong with your bed?”
“Nothing.”
“Then go and sleep there.” Logan turned his head away from you and scrunched up his pillow beneath his head.
“I can’t. My neighbours have decided tonight is Valentine’s Day 2.0.”
You pushed half of his body with your hands until he finally got the cue to turn over.
“Too much information.”
You shook your head, “Too much information is what I’ve been hearing for the last hour.”
Finally, Logan rolled onto his back, his covers covering his bottom half, and groaned. “Fine.”
“Thank you.”
Logan straightened himself in his bed, giving you room to get in beside him. And the minute you touched his covers, you were glad you had changed into shorts.
Logan was like a furnace. Just constant heat radiating from his body and for as much as it, at times, got too hot to stand near him, he was also, in your opinion, the best person to fall asleep beside.
“Just shut up and go to sleep.”
Laying on your side, it wasn’t long until you closed your eyes, thankful that you could hear nothing other than Logan’s steady breathing and the distant clock down the hall that was forever ticking.
However, just before you fully drifted off, you felt Logan’s hand take hold of yours and you smiled.
He could be gruff all he liked, but when it came to you, he could be a softie.
By the time morning rolled around, Storm was in search of both yourself and Logan. So, when she found your bed empty and cold, she figured Logan would know where you were.
But he was asleep.
Right beside you.
Storm leaned against the door frame for a while, taking in the picture in front of her.
Logan was fast asleep, something that was a miracle in itself, with you right beside him, your head turned towards the windows in his room, his own looking towards you, all the while, his arm slung over your midsection and one of your own hands, holding his.
“Storm- what are you- Oh.”
Jean looked inside.
“Looks like someone had a good night.” She smiled before looking back at Storm. “Do you think we can finally ask if they’re together?”
“I’d say this is confirmation enough.”
You shifted in your sleep as did Logan, and the two girls hid behind the corner for a moment.
You turned your head and the rest of your body towards Logan, all the while his arm held you in a stronger grip and pulled you towards him.
It took you a moment but you finally opened your eyes, adjusting to the light before your vision finally cleared on a sleeping Logan.
For a moment, you allowed the hand between you both to reach up and brush the stray hairs from his eyes. It was rare you ever got to see Logan this…calm.
Serene.
Rested.
Unknowingly, you started to run your left thumb over Logan’s arm that still held onto you.
Then his fingers twitched, running over the exposed skin at the bottom of your back.
“Are you watching me sleep?” His voice was rough, the first words in the morning.
“Not anymore,” you smiled, brushing the final parts of his hair out of his face.
“Thanks for letting me stay.”
Then a cough came from the door.
Logan groaned. “Is this a new hobby; watching people sleep?”
Jean and Storm laughed from the door. “You two look cosy.”
You lifted your head and glared at Jean. “There is one reason I’m here. Maybe I think it’s time you make an investment in soundproof walls.”
Jean turned a little red and Storm laughed.
“Look, we’ve got a busy day. You can kiss your boyfriend later.”
“He’s not my boyfriend,” you called out just as Logan called; “She’s not my girlfriend.”
Storm and Jean nodded and just as Jean snapped a picture, she sent it to both yourself and Logan as they walked away.
“Sure.”
Leaning up, Logan reached for his phone to see the notification pop up before he placed it back down and you climbed out of bed.
“They’re got a point.”
“About us being a couple?”
You threw a t-shirt at Logan. “Having a busy day.”
Logan laughed a little, scrubbing his face as he watched you leave his room before he reached behind him and took hold of his phone once more.
Jean and Storm were right.
From the picture…they did look like a couple.
A couple of days passed and you were sitting in the quiet living room, the fires on both sides roaring.
All classes had been finished for two days and some kids had returned home for the holidays, which meant you had some free time on your hands.
And for you, that meant finally reading.
Until you sensed someone stood behind you.
“If you want to know what happens, you could just ask me.”
Logan plucked the book from your hands and circled around the sofa before coming to sit down beside you.
“Logan! Give it back.”
“I want to see what it’s about.”
You sighed and sat up, “It’s a romance, Logan.”
“A romance?” Logan had a hint of a smirk on his face. “Like the…trashy kind?”
“Like the romantic kind.”
Logan looked at you and smiled. “The trashy kind.”
You rolled your eyes and took the book back from him, leaving him to fix the blanket so it rested over both of you. He placed his arm over the back of the sofa, allowing you to lean into him, whether you noticed you were doing so or not.
“Just because you might not believe in romance, doesn’t mean the rest of us are the same.”
“I believe in romance.”
“Yeah, right.”
Logan couldn’t help but smile. “What?”
“The Wolverine,” you said with a deep voice. “Believes in romance?”
Logan nodded. “Occasionally.”
“Occasionally?”
“Do you just like repeating everything I say?”
You nodded and smiled. “Occasionally.”
Logan rolled his eyes and took the book back from you and read a line out loud.
“People really talk like this?”
You leaned into Logan. “No, but in a book it’s not so bad. Go on, read some more.”
“You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?”
You nodded. “You’re like my own personal audiobook.”
Logan gave a short smile before getting a little cosier and continued reading out loud.
It wasn’t long before Logan found you asleep against him and he shifted in order to avoid you getting a crick in your neck.
“Keep reading.”
“I thought you were asleep.”
“Now I’m awake.”
“Fine, just be quiet.”
You gave a fake salute. “Yes, sir.”
Holding his arm around your body that was pressed between himself and the sofa, Logan quickly kissed the top of your head and went back to reading.
And ten minutes later, you were asleep.
And so was he.
An hour passed before someone found either of you, but this time, it was Scott and Bobby.
“They might be in- oh. What do we have here?”
“Oh my god, Rouge has to see this. I told her they were together.”
Bobby rushed off and soon returned, pulling Rouge with him.
“What is it?” Then she gasped.
“Believe me now?”
And what Rouge saw made her smile.
On the slightly too small sofa for Logan, you lay both between him and the sofa, as well as partly on him with your hand a little over his heart. His head was turned towards you. The blanket had fallen a little, so she reached over and pulled it up both of you before turning around and throwing a log onto the fire.
“Come on, let's leave them.”
“But-”
“No, you are not going to disturb them. Come on.”
Rouge dragged the pair out and closed the door behind her.
The third time people suspected you and Logan were an item was one late evening in October.
Half of the kids were playing outside with all the freshly fallen leaves, whilst some of the older kids helped them find different critters and point them out, and build them habitats. The rest of the kids were either in their rooms or studying.
Save for two.
Bobby and Rouge were hiding outside of the kitchen watching yourself and Logan cook.
“I didn’t even know he knew how to…chop. Let alone cook.”
“You should have more faith in him.”
“Come on, Rouge. You can’t tell me you weren't thinking it, too.”
And she couldn’t. Because she was.
Meanwhile inside the kitchen, Logan was watching you from the kitchen island as he continued chopping the veg.
There was something different about you. From the way you practically danced around the kitchen finding the different items for the recipe, to just…you. Whilst he was (semi) shirtless, just having his zipper hoodie on, along with his jeans and socks. He would have been fully dressed, except you had come and ambushed him in his room – even though you denied the word “ambushed” – to get him to help.
And you were just simply in your pyjamas (of sorts) along with one of his zipper hoodies.
“Bub,”
Logan laid down his knife and walked over to you as you stood by the stove, standing a little higher to see how much water was left in the pot at the back.
You hummed a questioned response, but was met with a question…you didn’t expect.
“Dance with me?”
“What?”
Logan smiled lightly as he pulled the wooden spoon from your hand and pulled you closer to him, despite him walking backwards.
“Come on,” his voice in a light whisper. “Dance with me.”
“Didn’t take you for a dancer.”
Outside the door, Bobby and Rouge mouthed to each other; “They’re dancing.”
And you both were.
Gently swaying to the music for a while, you allowed Logan to lead you around a small space in the centre of the kitchen.
“We’re gonna burn the sauce.”
Logan gave a slight smile at you as he spun you out and back in, “We’re not gonna burn the sauce.”
“Logan.”
“Can’t you ever just enjoy a moment?”
“When that moment doesn’t include burning the house down, yes.”
“Bit of a jump, don’t you think, from burning the sauce.”
“Ha, so you agree. We’re gonna burn the sauce.”
Moving over, Logan turned down the heat on one of the pans before taking your hand back into his. “Now we won’t.”
Bobby and Rouge watched, in shock, the rest.
For one, Logan knew how to dance? Since when? And since when did he…cook and dance in the kitchen? Unless…
Then Logan did something even you didn’t expect.
He dipped you.
You hand tightened its grip on Logan’s arm as you let out a small, if a little nervous, laugh.
Logan had been full of surprises recently. From the impromptu audiobook session in which you woke up in his arms, to him not only dropping off a cup of coffee during your break from teaching but also a freshly baked muffin.
And now he was dancing with you in the kitchen.
And dipping you.
When you had rushed him out of his room to help you cook, you hadn’t expected him to know the recipe for the sauce from the top of his head. Something he just happened to rattle off whilst you were looking for the cooking notebook that should have been in the cupboard beside the oven. Let alone be the one to ask to dance in the kitchen, and dip you.
Bring you back up, both of you gave a slight chuckle as you turned around, the music slowly fading away in the background.
“Logan…”
Looking at him, you forgot what you were going to say.
Had his eyes always had so much green in them?
Logan’s palm became warm against your back as it pressed further into you. Or maybe you pressed further into him and he just held you tighter.
Slowly, your hand left his bicep and trailed towards his chest all the while your eyes studied his face. You’d known him for years and seen him a thousand times or more.
So why did now feel like you were seeing him for the first time? Noticing him? Noticing each particle he was made up of that allowed him to sway with you in the kitchen to the music that had changed on the radio?
Only, before the space between yourself and Logan became any more closer, a noise came from outside the door.
A sneeze.
A sneeze that shocked you and Logan back into reality.
Still holding you, Logan looked towards the door and gave a hint of a smile when he saw the flash of white disappear behind the beam.
Realising what was happening, you lowered yourself back to the ground and slowly stepped out of Logan’s arms. “We should finish up.”
Logan nodded in agreement, however did look back at you when you got back to the stove, not noticing you do the same a few moments later, watching him pick up the rest of the veg and toss it into the collider to be washed.
Time passed and after more music, more conversation - including a burnt tongue from when you had shoved a wooden spoon with fresh sauce on, into Logan’s mouth for him to try - and a lot of scrubbing later, you found Logan sitting inside the library and collapsed next to him.
“Good news, the kids loved the food,” you told Logan. “Double good news; Jean and Scott are on cooking duty tomorrow.”
“Thank fuck.”
“Thank you for helping me.” Turning to look at Logan, you found him already looking.
“You did ambush me.”
“I didn’t ambush you.”
“I wasn’t dressed.” Logan examined himself. “Technically, I’m still not.”
You rolled your eyes with a slight smile. “Fine. Maybe it was a mini, tiny, miniscule ambush.”
You made a small space between your fingers. “Like this big of an ambush.”
Logan looked at you, at your fingers and then back to you in slight disgust before moving your fingers wider with his own.
“That big of an ambush.”
You rolled your eyes and dropped your hand. “And they say us women are dramatic.”
It was Logan’s turn to roll his eyes. However, as he did so, his arm wrapped around you, and pulled you back into him and the sofa.
“Just shut the fuck up for a minute and listen.”
You did so.
“I don’t hear anything.”
“That’s the point.” Logan’s eyes were shut as his head rested on the back of the sofa.
Eventually you gave a shrug and joined him.
An hour later, Storm found you both fast asleep beside one another so with a knowing smile, she found a blanket, covered you both up and closed the door behind her. But not before reminding herself she needed to get verbal confirmation from you both.
She wasn’t handing over any money to Jean and Xavier until she had verbal confirmation of what exactly was going on between you two.
And she didn’t have to wait long…at least in the long run, she didn’t have to wait long.
Until then, there were plenty more incidents of falling asleep next to each other, bringing each other coffee, dancing to music in the kitchen, smiling and laughing – all before she finally got verbal confirmation that the inevitable had finally happened.
Finally, it was acceptable to decorate for Christmas.
Two days prior, Rogue, Logan and Storm had been helping you find all the old decorations in the attic and bring them down. Storm did try then to bribe something out of Rogue, but she apparently was just in the dark as the rest of them.
But the smile she gave when she looked over at Logan, who was placing down another box from the back of the pile for you to take a look at, told Storm something different.
“I can’t believe you leave it this late to decorate.”
Logan looked at you. “We’re still in November.”
“So?”
Taking hold of the garland, you started to climb the ladder. Logan held onto the bottom just to be safe.
“If you had it your way, the decorations would be up all year round.”
“Hey, no.”
“Hey, yes.”
“I’d take them down for…” you tried to think. “Halloween. You’d have a little break.”
Logan didn’t look entirely thrilled. “Halloween is one day.”
“Technically, it’s a month.”
“To you, it’s a month. To the rest of us, it’s a day.”
You looked back at him. “To you it’s a day, to the rest of us it’s a month.”
Then you looked back at the garland. “How does that look?”
“Great from where I’m standing.”
You looked a little confused for a second before quickly looking over your shoulder, realising where Logan was, in fact, looking.
Not at the garland, but at your ass.
You smiled and started to step down the ladder, hitting his shoulder on the way down.
“I meant the garland.”
“Oh, yeah, sure.” Logan looked up. “Looks great.”
You laughed. “You didn’t even look.”
With a smile as you finally stepped back into his arm, he looked to the side and up. “It looks great.”
“Good. Now,” Logan turned back to look at you and you kissed him quickly. “We have to put up five more.”
“I get to watch you put up five more.”
You smiled. “This is why you’re my favourite person.”
Logan smiled. He could help you with everything else, but when it came to the garland, you had full control on where it went. Which, he didn’t mind. So long as he got to watch you put it up.
You quickly kissed him once more, only to be pulled back when you tried to walk away.
Then Logan gave you a real kiss.
A little dizzy, you smiled and placed a hand on his chest and closed your eyes. “Wow.”
He gave you a quicker, lighter kiss. “You better get going before Rogue comes back with another box of lights.”
“Light?” Then it hit you. “Oh, yeah.”
Logan smirked a little as he watched you walk away and down the hallway.
It was a couple of hours before everyone was in the same room, making the final touches all the while most of the other kids were either playing outside in the snow, were taking naps or decorating their own rooms.
And the others had been watching you and Logan all day.
The stolen glances, the stolen touches, the slightly knowing smiles from both Rogue and Bobby. And then, as Logan was helping you down from the ladder, his hand on your thigh, Bobby went to make the final hammer to hang up the mistletoe.
“Wait, no. Not there.”
“Where then?”
Storm looked around. “I know. Y/n, hang this just above there. We don’t need a remake of Mistletoe Central 1997.”
Logan looked at Storm. “Do I wanna know?”
Storm shook her head. “Here.”
She handed you the mistletoe before Logan passed you the hammer back from his belt.
Three knocks and the nail was set in and the mistletoe was above you on a corner beam, just a little to the side of the christmas tree.
At least this way, those looking for it, would find it.
"Oh, no, wait.” Jean said, looking at you. “Have to kiss someone. It’s tradition. You’re under the mistletoe.”
There was no one else apart from Logan.
Logan looked around at the others. He wondered how long it would take.
Coming up behind you on the ladder, you moved over for him to stand beside you. His palm on your back held you steady and, leaning his other arm on the ledge of the ladder, his hand cupped your face and he kissed you.
Lasting a little longer than the others had expected, you soon heard Rogue giving a little cheer, as well as a couple of whistles from the others.
“Okay, I think they get it.” You whispered to Logan as he finally pulled away, a smile very noticeable on both of your faces.
“Happy now?” Logan asked, turning towards where Jean and Scott were standing.
“That was some kiss.”
You felt yourself blush at the comment. As did Logan.
He helped you back down the ladder before you both turned and really saw the other's expression. As well as the exchanging of money between people.
“Sooo…how long has this been going on?”
You were leaning into Logan, his hand around your back and on your hip.
You looked at Logan, “A couple of months. We’re…what? November now so that would…”
“That would…” Logan counted back in his head. “May…June, July…six months.”
You looked back to the others. “Six months.”
A chorus of shocked faces and loud voices sounded out; “SIX MONTHS?!”
All before a small call from Rogue was made, which made both yourself and Logan smile.
“I knew it!”
#logan x reader#logan howlett x reader#wolverine x reader#the wolverine#wolverine#logan#logan howlett#logan howlett fic#wolverine fic#wolverine x you#logan x you#logan howlett x you#fluff#christmas#kissing under the mistletoe#established relationship#three times this one time that#sleeping together#dancing together#slow dancing in the kitchen#logan can cook#flirting#shirtless wolverine#shirtless logan#falling in love#falling asleep together#x men#x men x you
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Do Not Wait - M.S
a/n: this got heavier than i planned initially but i just leaned into wherever the story took me. it's also very reader focused, which i realized way too late. but, do not fret, matt is still in it :) lmk if you'd like me to continue this as a series... i hope yall like it, im proud of it.
summary: while matt is away, reader learns and struggles with some unexpected news that will change both their lives forever.
warnings: mentions of pregnancy, vomit, blood, death, grief, panic attacks, cursing. (no use of y/n)
word count: 11.7k
song: do not wait - wallows
"And it gets worse before it gets better That's one thing that I have come to know Just so you know"
“I hate to leave you like this,” Matt sighs, pushing my hair out of my face as his dark silhouette sits beside me on the bed.
I lay curled up in a ball after spending majority of the night sick. I feel terrible because I kept Matt up when he had to be up early for his flight to Chicago today.
Despite my attempts to avoid disturbing him, he spent most of the night beside me, rubbing my back while I hunched over the toilet and bringing me water.
I toss and turn, unable to find a comfortable position as my restlessness and nausea worsen by the second.
Matt’s hand touches my forehead, gently pushing my hair back and mindlessly scratching my head. I sit up as another wave of nausea twists my stomach, and I take a deep breath, hoping to suppress it. Matt sits up behind me, his hand now rubbing my back as I lean over the side of the bed with my head between my knees.
Thankfully, a moment later the wave of sickness passes and I sit up straight with a small groan as my body aches.
“I’m going to sleep on the couch. I don’t want to get you sick, and you have to be up in a few hours,” I croak, but he protests, gently pulling me back into bed.
"I don't give a fuck. I'll sleep on the plane, you're staying right here,"
As the morning light begins to filter through the curtains, Matt’s alarm goes off. By then, we had maybe collectively slept an hour and I knew he must have been exhausted. He got ready quietly trying his best not to disturb me, but I was already awake.
I don’t think sleep is in the cards for me tonight.
He places the back of his hand on my forehead, then my cheek, his touch gentle and searching.
“You still don’t have a fever...I don’t know if that’s good or bad,” He sighs, his fingers sifting through my hair with a tenderness that makes my heart ache.
Even with the faint light of dawn as our only source, I can still make out his concerned expression as he scans my face.
“I've never been this sick before. It must be a bug,” My voice is hoarse from repeatedly throwing up.
“Please, stay here with Nick while I’m gone so you have someone to look after you. I’m gonna text him now so he sees it when he wakes up. God, I don’t even want to go anymore,” He wipes his hand down his face in stress and I shake my head.
“No, stop, don’t worry about me. I’m gonna be fine. I’ll stay here with Nick. Please don’t be late for your flight,” I insist, gripping his hand weakly. “I’m going to make some tea and try to get some rest.” I go to get up but he puts his hand on my shoulder.
“I’ll make you tea, while we wait for the Uber. What do you want, mint?” He asks softly, his hand rubbing up and down my hip.
I nod weakly, thanking him.
I doze off a bit while he goes to make my tea, the repercussion of not sleeping catching up to me. When I open my eyes again, he’s setting my steaming mug on the bedside shelf carefully and placing two advils next to it.
“Text me when you wake up? And let me know if you have to go to urgent care, I’ll send you an Uber.” He tells me softly, his voice trembling with an emotion he’s trying to hide.
His reluctance to leave is evident in every line of his face.
I nod tiredly, “Mm, text me when you and Chris land. Have fun in Chicago. I love you.”
“I love you,” He kisses my forehead, before grabbing his suitcase by his bedroom door and leaving.
I was able to sleep a couple of more hours before I woke up again, dry heaving into the toilet because I quite literally had nothing left in my stomach.
I showered, brushed my teeth and went into the kitchen, searching for something bland to settle my stomach. I had decided to grab a rice cake and made more mint tea before I sprawled out on the couch in one of Matt’s hoodies.
It’s not the first time he’s been away, but this time, I miss him more than I anticipated. Even the scent of his hoodie brings a wave of emotion that catches me off guard.
We’ve never been one of those couples that spends every second of every day together anyway. Not even when we first started dating. We’ve always given each other the space we need.
But I must admit I could go for one of his hugs right now.
It’s around 10 AM when Nick comes down stairs and his face tells me everything I need to know about my appearance.
“I know, I look like shit.” I deadpan and he covers his mouth with wide eyes.
“I got Matt’s texts...I thought that motherfucker was being dramatic. Are you feeling any better?” He asks with a hand on his chest.
“Well, I haven’t thrown up in three hours, so that’s a new record. Your poor brother, I kept him up all night,”
“He'll live, do you want to go to urgent care?”
“No, I’ll wait it out. It’s gotta pass and I was able to keep my breakfast down.” I wave a hand.
Nick goes to make his own breakfast, slicing an apple before coming over to sit on the couch with me.
“Apple?” He offers me, munching on his own bite.
I decline shaking my head with a frown.
Nick wanted to watch Love Island, so I let him change the TV, feeling my eyelids grow heavy. As the sounds of the show filled the room, I found myself dozing off, giving in to the rest my body needs.
When I wake up, I have a blanket over me and Nick is editing on his laptop.
He notices me move and takes his headphones off one ear.
“Hey, you feeling better? Matt keeps pestering me for updates,” He shows me his phone with messages from a worried Matt.
I sigh, “Jesus...I’ll call him. But yes, I feel better now that I've gotten some sleep.” I get up and stretch my body, wincing at my achy muscles.
“How long was I out?” I ask grabbing my phone to see my own set of messages from Matt.
Kid worries too much.
“About 3 hours, you were knocked out. I’m gonna order food, are you hungry for anything?” He asks and my stomach rumbles at the thought of one food.
“I could fuck up some tacos right now,” I raise an eyebrow at him at my suggestion.
“I like the way you’re thinking.” He snaps his fingers pointing at me in agreement.
“Birria tacos for me and a Diet Coke. I’ll be right back, I’m gonna go call your brother before he has a heart attack.” I say walking to Matt’s room and calling him.
He picks up on the first ring.
“Hey,” He breaths out, his voice soft.
“What did I tell you about worrying about me?” I tease him and he laughs, sounding relieved.
"Hi!" I heard Chris shout in the background, before I heard a door close and Matt sigh. I'm guessing he went into a separate room.
“If you saw the state you were in before I left this morning, you’d be worried too. I take it you’re feeling better? Heard you napped,” He speaks up again, talking at a normal volume now.
“I was physically feeling the state I was in. But, yeah, a little better after my nap. How was your flight?” I ask, playing with the trinkets on his shelves.
“Besides me worrying the entire flight about you dehydrating and dying? Fine. A little turbulence, but nothing crazy.”
“Okay, drama, relax. I’m staying hydrated, I’ve napped, Nick and I are about to order some tacos. It must have just been a bug. I must admit, you're very cute when you worry about me though.” I smile and he hums shly.
A beat of silence goes by and I look at the photobooth picture of Matt and I on his wall.
“I miss you,” I admit to him, leaning down to inhale the collar of his sweatshirt on me.
“I miss you too. You know I haven't even been gone 12 hours though,” He reminds me, sounding amused at my unexpected sappyness.
I sigh, “I know,”
Suddenly I have a lump of emotion in my throat and he automatically hears the switch of my tone.
“Hey woah, what happened? Why are you upset?” He sounds panicked.
“Oh my god, sorry. I don’t know. I’m not even sad,” I choke back my tears.
“Doesn’t sound like it.." He doesn't sound convinced. "Do I need to come home?" He says next and I'm immediately objecting.
“What! No. Matt, I promise I’m fine.” I tell him quickly, taking off my hoodie as I begin to overheat.
“I love you... I’ll be back before you know it, okay? S'nothing we haven’t done before.” He reminds me softly and my bottom lip wobbles.
“Mhm,” I manage to get out and he sighs again.
“Sweetheart... You’re telling me not to be worried, but I’m beyond worried. Can you please tell me what’s wrong?” He pleads and I shake my head even though he can't see me.
“I honestly couldn’t tell you...I-i think I just needed to cry, and missing you isn’t helping because I wish I could hug you but you’re so f-far,” I hiccup.
“Okay, deep breaths, how about you take a nice hot shower–maybe a bath. Use Nick’s bath and when you’re done, you can eat your tacos and you’ll feel better. Okay? Listen, Chris and I are about to leave for dinner, are you going to be alright?” He checks in, sounding hesitant to hang up.
“Yes, I’m fine. Seriously. I’m sorry. I must be starting my period soon.” I compose myself, trying to ignore the sudden ache in my heart.
“It’s okay,” he says softly, his voice gentle and sweet.
Any other time, he’d be teasing me for being a crybaby—lovingly, of course—but I think he senses that my emotions are genuinely beyond my control right now.
“I love you,” he says again with emphasis, wanting to hear me say it back.
“I love you, so much," I say weakly, "Have fun at dinner and tell Chris I said hi.” I tell him, wiping my eyes.
“Will do. I’ll call you when we get back.” He says goodbye, hanging up.
I take a deep breath and I shake my head, feeling frustrated with my poorly-timed emotions. I feel terrible for worrying him more, I wanted this trip for him to be fun. Chris had really been looking forward to going with Matt—it had become a sort of tradition for the two of them. I need to get my emotions under control.
I wince again as I feel the heaviness and soreness in my breasts. Sighing, I go to my phone and check my period app to see when this torture will be over.
My stomach drops when I open the app and see I'm 13 days late.
My head feels dizzy suddenly and I pinch my eyes closed as the pit in my stomach spurs on more nausea. I lay back and put my arm over my eyes and take deep breaths.
My mind races, but I can’t seem to focus on one thought.
No, I can’t be.
I’m just stressed, that’s all.
I have an IUD, it's not possible.
But everything's adding up; the nausea, heightened emotions, late period...
I sit up slowly, feeling the weight of the realization settle on me. My heart pounds in my chest and I squeeze my eyes shut, trying to block out the flood of emotions threatening to drown me. But there’s no escaping this.
With trembling hands, I go to call Matt back, my thumb hovers over the call button but I stop myself. He’s going to dinner right now, on the opposite side of the country.
I can't burden him with this, not when I don’t even know for sure.
Dropping my phone onto the bed beside me, I try to self soothe, taking deep breaths to steady myself, but the anxiety is relentless.
I walk out of the room and Nick is asking me what kind of salsa I want with my tacos before he looks up at me. He immediately furrows his brows in worry.
“Hey–what's going on, are you okay?” He sits up and places his laptop on the coffee table.
“I-I can't breath,” I gasp, reaching out for him, feeling like a little kid.
He instantly stands up, wrapping his arms around my shoulders.
“What’s happened? Deep breaths, big deep breaths. There you go,” He rubs my back and I breath deeply with him.
My cheek smushed into his chest as I listen to the beating of his heart to help ground me. I pull away, still trembling and shake my head, unsure if I should even be telling Nick this.
This should be Matt.
Nick's eyes search mine, sensing my hesitancy. “You don’t have to talk if you’re not ready,” he says softly, his hands rubbing my shoulders.
I bite my lip, feeling a mix of guilt and desperation.
I don’t want to drag Nick into something so personal, but this is too overwhelming to keep bottled up.
“I… I think I might be pregnant,” I finally whisper, the words barely escaping my lips.
Saying it out loud makes it feel all the more real, and the weight of it presses down on me like a ton of bricks.
Nick’s expression shifts from worry to shock, his mouth falling agape and silence ringing between us. Once he hears me whimper, he snaps out of it and brings me back into a bone crushing hug.
"Shh, okay–it's okay, um…” His voice wavers, and I can feel his heart racing against my cheek.
For a moment, it seems like he’s trying to find the right words, but all that comes out is a nervous laugh.
“This is… wow, this is big. I'm sorry– I don't know what else to say right now,” His voice high pitched and shaky.
I can’t help but let out a shaky laugh with him, even through my anxiety.
“Yeah, big,” I agree, my voice barely above a whisper.
Nick pulls back just enough to look at me, his uncertainty showing in the way his eyes dart around, trying to process everything at once.
“I mean, I’m no expert on this—obviously—but we'll figure this out. You're gonna be okay, everything's gonna be okay.”
His reassurance is genuine, but I can see he's trying to convince himself too; a flicker of doubt in his eyes.
This is uncharted territory for both of us.
Nick and I had decided to order the tests along with the food, killing two birds with one stone. He’s doing his best to stay calm for my sake, but the trembling of his hands as he places the order is hard to miss.
"Okay, tacos and tests are on the way. I got, well, all of them because I don't know which one is best. I even got ice cream. Fuck, when did it get so hot in here? I'm overheating–are you overheating?" He says, his words moving a mile a minute as he fans himself with his shirt.
I can't help but to laugh as his nerves show and he shakes his head.
"I'm sorry, I know you're the one potentially knocked up by my idiot brother but I'm just so nervous. I'm sweating like a monster," His voice cracks.
"Do you mind if I use your bath?" I ask and he nods right away.
“Are you kidding? Of course, go ahead. Someone has to use it. I’m gonna…Well, I’ll just wait out here and try to chill.” He gives me a quick, reassuring smile, though it’s clear he’s still on edge.
I head to his bathroom and try to forget about my racing thoughts.
I turn the faucet on and put in some bath salts, checking the temperature before I step over to the vanity mirror. I take a look at my appearance and notice the puffiness in my face right away. My cheeks are flushed and my eyes are bloodshot.
I blow out a raspberry as I undress and get into the hot water.
The heat soothes my aching muscles and clears my mind. I soaked for a while, even draining a bit of the water and refilling the tub with more hot water. Once I feel myself pruning, I decide it's time I get out.
As I dry myself off, I notice light blood on the towel. My heart races, and I quickly check again—I'm bleeding. Very lightly, but there’s blood.
Relief floods through me, and I almost cry again, this time from the emotional whiplash. My legs feel shaky, so I sit down on the edge of the tub to steady myself, my breath coming out in shaky bursts.
Clutching the towel to my chest, I close my eyes and let out a long, relieved sigh.
“Thank God,” I whisper, feeling tears prick at the corners of my eyes.
I try not to dwell on the small part of me that almost wanted to feel disappointed. Maybe even mourning the part of me that might have embraced being pregnant–excited, even.
Instead, I focus on center of my emotions, the part where a massive weight has been lifted off my shoulders. Eventually, I pull myself together, cleaning myself up and getting dressed.
When I step out of the bathroom, Nick is on his bed, clearly trying to keep himself distracted. My eyes go to the food and the tests at the foot of the bed.
As soon as he sees me, he shoots up, his expression immediately shifting to one of concern.
“You okay?” he asks, his voice soft. I nod, a small smile breaking through the lingering anxiety.
“I’m okay,” I say, my voice a little shaky. “I uh…I got my period, I think,”
Nick’s face lights up with relief, his shoulders visibly relaxing. “Oh, thank God,” he shouts, “This is great fucking news—right?” He checks in and I nod.
“Yeah,” I agree, feeling a little dazed by how quickly everything has turned around. “I think we’re in the clear. We won't be needing those tests, I'll pay you back for them,"
Nick ignores me, pulling me into a bear hug, his arms so tight around me, I can barely breath.
“Shut up I don't care,” he says, “You don't have a parasite in you!" He cheers, jumping us up and down.
We both let out laughs, the tension that had been looming over us now replaced with a lightness.
“Let’s eat,” I suggest, letting out a breath I didn't know I was holding.
Nick nods, "Couldn't agree more,"
We sit on his bed and for the first time all day, I feel like I can actually breathe.
As we dig into the tacos, Nick puts Love Island back on and we rot in bed for a few hours.
But even as we talk and laugh, there's still a pit in my stomach. A small portion of me can’t shake the feeling that this isn’t over yet.
Yeah, there's was blood. But it was different than my normal period. It was lighter.
I try not to panic, but I can't help but feel like my intuition is trying to tell me something. For now, I push my thoughts aside, focusing on Nick beside me yelling at the annoying horny people on his TV.
Nick offered for me to sleep in his room but I declined, wanting to sleep in Matt's bed.
Matt never called me, but he texted me apologizing and checking in on me. I listened to a voice memo he sent me of all they did today and I was genuinely glad he was having fun, so I didn't mind him not calling.
Plus, I'm not entirely sure I'm in the right state of mind to have a conversation with him right now. I wouldn't be able to keep today's events to myself.
I know I can’t keep him in the dark—I need to tell him what’s going on.
I glance at the stack of tests on his dresser and sigh. The bleeding from earlier has stopped, leaving me with a pit in my stomach.
I know I’ll have to take those tests, even if only for clarity. But for now, I’m going to force myself to sleep.
I find myself in a place that feels both familiar and strange. It's warm, the sun showering the garden and I immediately know I'm in my grandmother's backyard.
The breeze picks up, carrying the scent of blooming flowers—lilies, hyacinths, peonies, and marigolds—enveloping me in a peacefulness that feels like a comforting blanket.
I walk along the familiar stone path, my fingers grazing the soft petals of the flowers. Each step feeling like a compelling, magnetic pull, guiding me deeper into the garden.
I see her then–my grandmother, seated on a wooden bench beneath the shade of the large oak tree I used to climb as a child.
My breath hitches, she doesn't look sick. Her smile is lively, her cheeks rosy and the green in her eyes vibrant.
But there’s something else different, a kind of ethereal glow about her that sends a chill down my spine.
“Come here, my girl,” she says, her voice soft and inviting.
I walk over to her, feeling a strange mix of emotions: comfort, longing, and an inexplicable sadness.
I sit down beside her and she takes my hand in hers, her touch warm and reassuring.
“I’ve missed you,” I say, my voice thick with emotion, unable to fathom her not sick in a hospital bed.
She smiles, her eyes full of love. “I haven't gone anywhere."
There’s a pause as I try to process her words, but then she looks at me knowingly, another shiver down my spine.
"You're glowing," She hums, tucking my hair behind my ear.
I look at her confused until she places a hand to my stomach. My breath hitches and I can't control the tear that rolls down my cheek.
I shake my head in disbelief, "How...d-do you know?" I whisper, my voice getting lost in the intoxicating breeze.
It's then that I feel a deep flutter in my stomach, one that I can't describe.
I place my hand over my grandmother's that still rests on my stomach. The flutter intensifies, my heart mimicking the pattern as warmth blooms in my chest. The feeling is overwhelming.
An unexpected, joyous sob escapes my lips before I can stop it, tears blurring my vision.
“You're both going to be okay,” My grandmother says softly, gently wiping away my tears.
My lip wobbles and I let out a shaky breath before she speaks up again.
“She’s strong too, just like you.”
“She..?” I squeak. My grandmother’s smile returns, softer this time and she nods.
A wave of shock and confusion washes over me, but before I can ask more, the garden begins to fade. The colors bleeding into each other until everything is a swirl of light.
Her voice echoes as the dream dissolves, “Don't be afraid, Petal.”
I shoot up, my heart racing, my face soaked in tears and my body covered in a cold sweat. I feel disoriented as I take in my surroundings and my mind tries to grasp the remnants of the dream.
My grandmother’s face, her words, the fluttering in my stomach. But now, that fluttering has turned into a twisting feeling in my gut.
Something was wrong.
My phone buzzes, startling me out of my tangled, fuzzy thoughts. My hands tremble slightly as I reach for my phone.
It’s my mom.
“Hello?” I answer, my voice thick with sleep and confusion.
There’s a pause on the other end, and then my mom’s voice comes through, shaky and heavy with emotion.
“Honey...I'm sorry I'm calling you so early, but it’s Grandma....Sh-she passed in her sleep early this morning.”
The words hit me like a punch in the gut, and for a moment, I can’t breathe. She continues to talk but I can't hear her, my ears ring and time slows down.
A flood of emotions overcome me.
Grief, shock, and the strange sense that the dream was more than just a figment of my imagination.
As the reality of her passing sinks in, I’m left with the weight of her final words to me. She was telling me something important, something I can’t ignore anymore.
My stomach twists again and I bolt to the bathroom where I throw up until I'm dry heaving into the toilet.
-
I'm not even shocked when the test immediately shows up positive. I stare blankly at the two pink lines, the only hint of emotion is the tremor in my hand as I grab the test and chuck it into the trash can.
I feel numb.
Staring at my reflection in the mirror, I see the emptiness in my eyes, the darkness encasing them. The person staring back is a stranger.
I'm pregnant.
I should be feeling joy, maybe even excitement—I want to at least, but all I feel is nothing. My experience overshadowed by my grief. By the anomaly of this situation, how this could have happened.
I have an IUD, I was bleeding, but here we are.
I wanted Matt to be the first to know, to share in that moment with him, but now everything feels wrong, out of order.
I feel robbed of the happiness I should be feeling.
I step into the shower and let the scalding hot water claw at my skin. I finally let myself break down, grief rattling through me and slicing me open.
My dream replays in my mind over and over again. My grandmother's eyes, her warmth, her words, her hand on my stomach.
“You’re both going to be okay,”
My hand instinctively goes to my stomach. I press my palm into my abdomen, expecting to feel that flutter, desperate to feel any sort of connection with the life that's there–to cling to the intense joy from my dream...but there's nothing.
It was ripped away from me from the moment I woke up.
“She’s strong too, just like you,”
I whimper, the sound dissolving into the rush of the water.
I don’t feel strong. I feel weak.
My grandmother told me not to be afraid, but I can’t escape this overwhelming anxiety, the suffocating uncertainty that engulfs me.
The tightness in my chest, the heaviness in my heart, the deep-seated guilt that festers within me.
I cry and cry and cry until I can’t anymore, until the tears run dry, leaving only the ache in my chest.
When the water turns cold and the sun fully rises, is when I finally get out. My feet drag beneath me as I walk back into Matt's room and get dressed.
I pull on one of Matt's crewnecks and some sweats before I go into the kitchen to make a tea.
I make myself an Earl Grey, my grandmother's favorite.
I sit down at the dining table and book the first flight back home to Maine, which is tomorrow morning. My mom and I spoke again and she told me the funeral isn't until next week, but I wanted to be there for her. I couldn’t stay here right now.
My stomach growls loudly and I press my palms into my eye sockets. I suppose I should really eat something with substance, especially now.
I grab the berries from the fridge that are in their last leg, washing them before forcing myself to eat. The tartness of the blueberries sparks a memory of helping my grandmother make blueberry pancakes on Sunday mornings. I smile sadly at the fond memory of being her little sous chef.
When 7 AM rolls around, restlessness overtakes me and I step outside, sitting in the front stoop before calling Matt.
"You're up early," His voice thick with sleep as he greets me through the line.
"Hey," I say weakly, letting out a sigh as I gaze up at the clear sky. There's not a single cloud in sight.
"What's wrong?" His tone immediately shifts to concern.
"Matt... my grandma passed this morning," I start, my voice trembling slightly.
I omit the dream and the positive pregnancy test in his bathroom, grateful that he can't see my face.
There's a heavy sigh on the other end. "I'm so sorry. I know she was sick for a while... Are you doing okay? How's your mom?"
"I'm... managing. And my mom, she's actually doing okay. I think we're all relieved in a way, you know? It was only a matter of time. I'm just glad she's not suffering anymore," I navigate my feelings about her passing, my voice surprisingly steady.
"Of course," His voice is so soft, fueling my longing for his touch.
"Do you think…there's any way you can change your flight on Tuesday to go to Maine? The funeral isn’t until next Thursday, but I’m getting there tomorrow afternoon." I ask, playing with a loose string on my sweatpants.
"Of course, I'll look at flights right now," he responds without hesitation.
"Thank you, I just....I need you there," I tell him, feeling a tightness in my chest when I avoid mentioning the conversation we need to have.
"I'll be there. I found a flight that will get me there tomorrow night."
"Matt–" I start to protest.
"I already changed it. No refunds," He cuts me off, his voice firm. "Sweetheart, you need me, I'm not going to make you wait until fucking Tuesday."
"What about the rest of your trip? You'll miss the rest of the festival, and Chris–" I try and reason with him.
"Listen to me carefully...I don't give a fuck about the festival. You need me there, and I'm going to be there. Chris will be fine, he's a big boy. He has Sam here with him and they'll fly back to LA together," His tone leaving no room for argument, his mind was made up.
A small, grateful smile tugs at my lips as tears well up in my eyes.
"I love you," I manage to say, my voice trembles with emotion.
"I love you, so much it hurts. I wish I could hug you right now but I'll see you tomorrow, okay? I’m gonna go talk to Chris, text me or call me if you need me. I mean it, kid."
“I will,” I promise, ending the call and looking up at the sky again, wrapping my arms around myself as the cool morning air brushes against my skin.
I take a deep breath, the air filling my lungs grounding me. As I exhale, I try to focus on the one thing I know for sure—I may not feel strong, but I need to be and not just for myself, but for the life growing inside of me.
My grandmother's words echo in my mind.
"Don't be afraid, Petal."
–
Nick wakes up shortly after, only taking one look at me before I’m breaking down again—the weight of everything crashing down on me like another tidal wave.
I tell him everything, my dream, my grandmother's passing, I show him the positive pregnancy test.
I cry into his chest, feeling overwhelmed.
"I'm just s-so confused," I manage to say between sobs. "In my dream, I was so happy... everything felt right. I felt connected with..." My words trail off, dissolving into incoherent blubbering.
Nick just listens, rubbing my back in slow, soothing circles.
"Listen," he begins softly, "your body is under a lot of stress right now. You just found out about your grandma, and then this very unexpected news on top of it… Every single emotion you’re feeling is normal, and 100 percent valid. But you have so many people by your side who love you and will help you through this, no matter what you decide..."
I sniffle, trying to regulate my breathing as I take in his words.
"I'm angry, too," I admit, my voice cracking with the strain of holding it all in. "This is so unfair. The timing of this couldn't be worse... I can't even talk to Matt and I feel awful keeping this from him. He shouldn't have to find out like this."
"Everything is going to be okay, deep breaths," Nick repeats, his voice calm as he helps me process the flood of emotions.
I blow out a raspberry, pulling back and running my hands down my face in frustration. When I look at him, he's watching me cautiously, trying to read my expression.
"I'm pregnant," I say softly, the words finally leaving my lips for the first time.
A mix of emotions swirls in my chest and stomach—fear, uncertainty, a strange kind of acceptance.
Nick nods slowly, his eyes still scanning my face, and for a moment, I find myself imagining if this was me telling Matt.
More dread fills me.
How will he react? Will he be the support I need?
We’ve talked about having kids before. They were always in the cards for us, but never this soon.
We only just started to discuss getting our own place and now our lives are going to be changing forever.
Nick helped me pack as I tried to arrange a last-minute appointment to confirm my pregnancy, which proved to be quite the ordeal.
The receptionists initially inform me that they didn't have any openings for weeks. However, when I mention the IUD and a positive pregnancy test, the urgency in their voice shifted dramatically.
They told me to come in right away.
The urgency in the receptionists voice on the phone didn’t help my nerves. Neither when they took me straight into an examination room the minute I told them my name.
They take my vitals, draw my blood and give me a cup to pee in.
I left Nick in the waiting room, dressing down into the gown they placed neatly on the exam chair. I look around at the diagrams of the fetuses and the posters of the development. I’ve seen these countless times and never thought twice, but this time I feel unsettled.
I swallow thickly and sit on the loud crinkly paper with the anticipation of the doctor coming in soon.
There’s a soft double knock on the door before a head of wild, curly hair peeks in.
“Hello, hello. I’m Dr. Sullivan,” She says washing her hands and sitting down on the swivel stool next to the examination chair.
The woman has a mane of big, unruly curls that frame her face, with chunky black square-framed glasses perched on her slightly humped nose, drawing attention to her bright hazel eyes. A wide smile, complete with a distinctive gap between her two front teeth, radiates warmth and adds to her quirky charm. She almost seems like a character out of a cartoon—lanky, with an energetic, bouncy stride that matches her bubbly personality. She can't be much older than my mother.
"So, you are in fact pregnant. The lab results confirmed the presence of HCG, which is the hormone produced during pregnancy. "
“Do you have any idea how this happened? I mean, obviously I know how it happened but, I have an IUD.” I say, still trying to wrap my head around the situation.
She nods dramatically, her lips pressing into a line as she listens to my concerns.
“Unfortunately, no birth control is 100 percent effective. In most cases, the IUD might have been displaced, or in some instances, the body rejects the device without you knowing. I actually would like to get clarity on that with an ultrasound, but I think it’s important for you to know the risks of this scenario here.” She says, turning slightly more serious.
“Risks?” I ask, my voice barely above a whisper.
“Yes,” she says softly, “There is a possibility that, due to you having an IUD, this pregnancy may not be viable. Having an IUD increases the risk of what we call an ectopic pregnancy... are you familiar with that term?” Her hazel eyes lock onto mine and I shake my head, my heart starting to pound.
“Well, because you have a contraceptive device in the space where a fetus would normally develop, there's a risk that the pregnancy could occur outside the uterus. Typically the egg will implant itself in the fallopian tubes, which cannot host a safe or viable pregnancy...And if not treated immediately, the tube can rupture and cause internal hemorrhaging," She explains gently, carefully choosing her words to convey the seriousness of the situation.
I feel my heartbeat in my ears now as I process her words.
"So you're saying, this can be life threatening...for me and the..." My throat closes up and I can't finish my sentence.
She must take notice of the panic in my face, her round eyes widening slightly.
"If it goes untreated, yes. But I don't say this to make you panic, you're in good hands and whatever happens, we will take the next steps together." She places a hand on my knee, giving the tissue box so I can dry my uncontrollable tears.
"Based on your last period, you should be about seven weeks along. This ultrasound will confirm that and also ensure the pregnancy is positioned in the uterus. Before we proceed, I'd like to ask you a few questions... do you need a minute?" she asks gently, noticing my unease.
I hiccup and shake my head. "N-no, I'll be okay. Sorry," I mumble, wiping my nose.
"Don't apologize," she says kindly, giving me a moment to collect myself anyway, which I appreciate.
For a moment, I consider calling Nick in, but I decide against it. Even though we're close, this may be a little too personal, even for him and I.
"Have you been experiencing any cramping or discomfort in your back or abdomen?" She asks and typing my answer into the computer as I tell her no.
"Any spotting or bleeding?"
"I had some light bleeding last night, it only lasted maybe an hour... I had thought it was my period, but I knew something was off." I explain to her and she nods.
"That was most likely implantation bleeding, which is normal. It can be light spotting of blood, or some women experience heavy bleeding, similar to a period." She continues to take her notes before looking to me again, "Any tenderness in your breasts?"
"Oh, for sure. My breasts have been very sore the past few days,"
"Any nausea or vomiting?"
"Yes, the last couple of days–especially at night, I've been vomiting. I haven't really been sleeping well because of it."
"Yeah, the term 'morning sickness' is misleading... It can happen any time of day, you seem to be experiencing yours during the evening. Any other symptoms you've noticed that you'd like to note?" She asks and I try to think of some things.
"Uhh, I guess I've been more tired than usual, but I chalked that up to being up all night sick...I've also been getting hot flashes recently and I've definitely been more emotional,"
"These are all good to note, thank you very much," She pushes her glasses up the bridge of her nose before typing again.
She swivels herself back towards me, smiling warmly.
"We'll go ahead with the ultrasound now. But to get an accurate picture, we're going to do a transvaginal ultrasound, if that's okay with you."
"Okay, that's fine," I say, shakily.
She pulls the ultrasound cart to toward her before standing to move the stirrups into place so I can place my feet into them. She places a privacy cloth over me and I take a deep breath.
She puts a covering on the sheath of the ultrasound wand and places lubricant on the top of it. She taps a few buttons on the computer, calibrating the machine before turning towards me with a reassuring smile.
"So this will feel cold and you might feel a little pressure but if you feel any discomfort don't be afraid to tell me." She informs before placing the device inside to create the image.
I try not to wince and try to relax as much as possible. I go to look toward the screen but she has it faced towards her, so I opt to reading her facial expressions.
Dr. Sullivan adjusts her glasses by putting them on the tip of her nose and tilting her head back to get a better view.
She's quite animated with her expressions, her mouth opening slightly in concentration as she looks over the screen.
Although I can't see what she's looking at, she seems pleased, which is a relief.
"Okay, so good sign so far, I see your IUD," Dr. Sullivan says, leaning forward and pointing to the screen. "I can clearly see that it's sitting at the top of your cervix. It’s shifted down and away from your uterus. Do you happen to experience heavy cramping during your cycle?" she asks, her fingers tapping some buttons on the monitor.
"Yes, I do," I reply, the worry still gnawing at me.
She nods thoughtfully. "That could explain the displacement. Sometimes, intense cramping can cause the IUD to shift from its original position. It’s not common, but it does happen. It’s good that we’ve caught it now."
"I see the embryonic sac in, from what I can tell, a great spot. You're measuring at about 6 or 7 weeks along. Size of a blueberry." She says and I stop breathing.
I don't even hesitate to say yes as she asks if I would like to see.
My eyes are glued to the screen as I follow where her finger points, focusing on the grainy image. There it is—a tiny black oval with an even tinier dot in the middle. It's so small, I almost think I'm looking at the wrong thing.
“That’s... them?” I whisper, my voice barely audible as I try to comprehend the sight in front of me.
Dr. Sullivan nods, her expression tender. "That's your baby. It's early, but everything looks promising..."
"Really?" I squeak, still in disbelief, my throat tightening with sudden emotion as more tears fall down my face.
Relief— as she nods in confirmation, handing me the tissue box again.
Hope— as she zooms in, showing me the flickering of the heartbeat.
Joy—as I hear the heartbeat, feeling it sync with the thumping of my own.
For the first time since my dream, I feel joy, something beyond the crippling dread that had loomed over me all day. My heart swells and then bursts as I continue to stare at the flickering dot on the screen, blinking away the tears that blur my vision.
I breathe in shakily before a laugh escapes through a sob.
"Nice strong heartbeat, everything looks as it should... this looks like a healthy pregnancy," Dr. Sullivan announces, gently removing the ultrasound wand but keeping a looped video on the screen, allowing me a few more moments to take it all in.
"She's strong too, just like you,"
"So, the next step—for your safety—would be to remove the IUD today," she continues, her tone calm yet serious. "We can also discuss your options moving forward, including your decision on whether or not you would like to continue with the pregnancy. It's important to weigh all the possibilities and make the choice that's right for you."
"I-I'm gonna continue the pregnancy. It was in no way planned, but–"
"You don't need to explain...I had a feeling" She dismisses me gently, giving me a knowing smile, "I guess this calls for a congratulations,"
"Thank you," I say just above my breath, warmth still blooming through my chest.
After Dr. Sullivan removes my IUD, she tells me to dress while she steps out to calculate my due date.
I stare at the printed ultrasound picture, my heart swelling with a fierce protectiveness. I’m not worried about the complications or uncertainties ahead right now. All that matters is this life inside me.
I feel much stronger than I did merely hours ago.
My due date was February 7th, the same as my grandmother’s birthday.
–
I had landed in Maine a few hours ago, my mom and I were organizing all of my grandma's belongings. We spent the afternoon together, grabbing lunch before heading over to my grandmother's house.
The house always felt like a time capsule, preserving every memory. The duck wallpaper in the dining room, the scent of pine and clove, the worn couch cushions, her miniature schnauzer figurine collection, and the framed pressed flowers from her children’s weddings—everything was always in its rightful place. It always looked the same.
Memories of me and my siblings spending weekends here whirling behind my eyelids as I inhale the familiar scent.
It evokes a bittersweet feeling.
We keep the mood light, sharing stories with each memory we packed away. I still saw the flicker of sadness in my mom's eyes, even through her laughter as we reminisced.
Sitting on the carpet in the living room, we go through the boxes full of pictures to put together a collage for the funeral. I come across a picture of my mother pregnant with my older brother.
It's a candid photo in the kitchen of my grandmother's house, her hand resting on her swollen belly that pokes out the bottom of her blue shirt, a soft smile on her face. My grandmother is beside her, beaming with pride, tying an apron around her waist.
My mother looked so young, her freckles prominent on her flushed cheeks and her smile crinkling the corners of her eyes.
I was always told I looked more like my dad, but seeing her like this, so close to my own age now, I can't help but notice the resemblance.
My mom notices my pause and looks over my shoulder. "That was just a few weeks before your brother was born," she says softly, her voice laced with nostalgia. "Your grandmother knew we were having a boy from the moment we told her,"
Her words send a chill down my spine.
I linger on the photo, feeling a wave of emotion rise up at the mention of my grandmother as the weight of my own news presses heavier on my chest.
"Were you really sick, when you were pregnant?" I ask, lowly.
She hums in thought, "With your brother? Only for maybe the first few weeks. With you though? Forget about it, I was sick everyday for months."
I stay silent for a moment, studying another photo of my mom and dad in the hospital room with my brother the day he was born. My mom is in the hospital bed, looking tired but radiant, while my dad is crouched next to her, gently cradling my brother in his arms.
"He was so bald," I laugh softly, and my mom chuckles beside me.
"His hair was so blonde, it was practically see-through. Your father called him 'egghead' for the first two months of his life," she says, shaking her head and rolling her eyes with a smile.
I look at the photo again, my gaze lingering on my mom's face. Her expression is filled with such warmth and love as she looks at my dad.
"How did you tell dad? You guys were both pretty young," I ask and she stifles a laugh.
"We actually found out together in a gas station bathroom..." She starts off with a slightly shameful smile, "I had been so sick on our camping trip with your aunt and uncle, so I decided on our way back home to take a test. We were shocked to say the least, but we were happy," She shrugs casually.
I think about how I was alone when I found out I was pregnant. Matt wasn't there, and it wasn't his fault, but the last 36 hours of keeping this from him has been torture.
The moment I saw the second line show up with fresh cold sweat still rolling down my neck, I had to bottle up this relentless guilt.
I feel guilt. It wasn't anyone's fault. This is the most serendipitous situation I've ever been in, but I put the blame on me. I have a choice and I'm choosing the route that will completely flip our already hectic lives upside down.
Tethering us together for life.
Even if this decision it feels right, it still carries an enormous weight. It’s not just my life that’s about to change—it's Matt’s too.
I have no doubt Matt will be supportive, but when you're left alone with your thoughts long enough, you can convince yourself of anything.
I've spent every waking minute wondering how he'll react, imagining every possible scenario, from the worst to the best. It's been an endless loop of 'what ifs,' and it’s taken everything in me not to just blurt it out over the phone.
"Were you scared at all? I mean, weren't you like 20?" I press, searching for reassurance in her response.
Her eyes widen before nodding, "Oh, we were scared shitless. Your father almost passed out. We had no idea what we were doing, but hey, we survived. For better or for worse,"
I nod, looking down at my lap and fidgeting with my fingers. My chest feels tight, and the weight of everything becomes almost unbearable.
"Mom, there's something I need to tell you... I–"
"I know," She looks at me with a small smile, her green eyes glistening with tears.
My brows furrow together, giving her a confused look.
"You do?" I ask, my voice trembling.
She shrugs, "I know everything, I'm your mom... Plus, you gagged at the smell of chicken today, that was a dead giveaway." She bites back a smirk and I cover my face, laughing through some tears before looking at her again.
"I guess I’m not as good at hiding things as I thought."
"You never were," She says softly as she scoots closer to me, bringing me into her warm embrace.
I sigh deeply into her, squeezing her tight and breathing in her comforting scent.
"How are you feeling?" she asks, still holding onto me.
"Scared shitless..." I joke and we share a laugh before she pulls back to wipe the tears that escaped against my will, "But I'm happy," I admit, scanning my mother's face for any sign of judgement.
There was none.
She wipes her own few tears, looking at me with only love in her eyes.
"My baby's having a baby,"
"I think grandma sent me this baby," I whisper, allowing my emotions to come through.
My mom tucks my hair behind my ear with her gentle, comforting touch and she listens intently as I tell her my dream. We hold onto each other and cry. I then show her the ultrasound pictures and we talk until the sun disappears.
My phone buzzes softly and I check the message to find Matt’s text that he’s landed and on his way. The reality of his imminent arrival causes a mixed-wave of nausea and guilt to wash over me.
My mom looks at me with a reassuring smile.
"I'll leave you two be so you can talk. I'll see you in the morning, my love." She tells me softly, kissing my cheek and hugging me tight.
Matt and I were gonna stay here during our time in Maine. It's best right now that we have our own space, especially since my brother and his girlfriend are staying by my parents house.
As she heads out, I take a deep breath and text Matt to let him know the door is unlocked. I slip into the shower, trying to calm my racing thoughts and steady my nerves. The warm water helps, but my mind keeps racing as I mentally prepare for the conversation ahead.
Wrapped in a towel, I check my reflection in the mirror, trying to see if I look any more put together than before.
I think this is the best we're going to get.
I jump when I here the front door open and shut, then some feet shuffling. My heart skips a beat.
Matt's here.
"It's just me," I hear him call out as well as more shuffling and a paper bag crinkling.
"Hey! I-I'll be right out!" I call back out, my heart picking up again but I take a deep breath.
I quickly get dressed in a tank top and shorts; there's a heat wave here, and I can't figure out how to adjust the thermostat.
I step out of the bathroom to see Matt standing at the kitchen island, unpacking burgers and fries onto the counter. The aroma of it makes my stomach growl and I realize I hadn't eaten anything since lunch.
I admire him for a second; he's wearing pink sweatpants, a black hoodie and a backwards fitted hat.
He turns at the sound of my presence and his face softens. I'm trembling when he steps forward to embrace me into a tight hug. He buries his face into my neck before giving me a few kisses there.
"Hi," I breath out, my voice shaky.
I was so nervous.
"Hey, you okay?" His voice is so soft, my heart aches. He pulls away, rubbing his hands up and down my arms while scanning my face.
"You're shaking. What's going on?" He presses.
He knows something is up, he can see it all over my face. I shake my head, brushing it off to have one more minute with him.
I pull him back to me, wrapping my arms around his neck this time and locking him against me. He bends down a bit to accommodate but doesn't question it, just hugging me back. His arms wrapping around my waist and pressing our stomachs together.
My heart is slamming against my ribcage and I know he can feel it, his thumb rubbing my hip soothingly tells me he does.
"How are you doing?" His voice is muffled with his face buried into my neck.
"I'm okay, better now that you're here. I missed you," I mumble, kissing the side of his neck and running my hand down between his shoulder blades.
I breathe him in, noting the warmth of him and the solidness of his body against me.
"I missed you... I brought us food. I don't know about you, but I'm fucking starving," He puts his hands on my hips to pull back from the hug, but I stay put.
He chuckles, giving me one more squeeze.
I pull back just enough to line our faces up and give him a kiss, which he eagerly returns.
"Thank you for being here, it means a lot," I say against his lips and he pulls back slightly to push my hair out of my face.
"I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else." He hums into another kiss, then places three quick pecks before giving my butt a light tap, signaling that it’s time to let him go.
I finally release him and head to the food on the counter.
"I passed a Five Guys on the way here, so I hope that's good for you," He grabs a handful of fries before munching on them.
As I reach the counter, the smell of the burgers makes my mouth water, and I can’t help but smile at his thoughtfulness.
“Five Guys is perfect, thank you,” I say, grabbing a fry from the bag and tasting its salty warmth.
Matt grins, clearly pleased with himself. “Good, because I was too hungry to think of anything else,” he jokes, unwrapping one of the burgers and handing it to me.
I take it, thanking him quietly, my fingers brushing against his. For a moment, I just look at him.
He’s here, and I should be telling him I’m pregnant with his child, but instead, we’re standing in the kitchen eating burgers. As if I’m trying to cling to this last bit of normalcy before everything changes.
I force myself to take a bite of my burger, moaning at the greasy, savory goodness. Matt smirks at me, taking a hearty bite of his own burger.
“S’good?” he asks through his bite, his eyes twinkling with amusement.
I nod, moaning again in response, savoring the taste as it temporarily distracts me from everything else.
Matt takes a sip of his drink before bringing a napkin to my face and wiping the corner of my mouth and chin.
"Wipe ya lip, kid," He teases and I roll my eyes, grabbing the napkin from him.
Matt inhales another large bite of his burger, and we slip into our familiar rhythm.
He tells me about his brief trip to Chicago, and I’m relieved to hear he managed to gather a few funny stories and catch at least one day of the festival. He’s notably enthusiastic while he talks, and I can’t help but smile at his excitement.
He also reassured me that Chris wasn't upset at all, which I already knew from the sweet text he sent me this morning.
“Well, I’m glad you had fun,” I say, trying to match his enthusiasm.
I then give him the rundown for the next few days while we prepare for the funeral and memorial.
We continue eating, the conversation shifting to lighter topics as we enjoy the burgers and each other’s company.
It feels so easy, so light. It always is with us. But underneath the surface, the words I need to say weigh heavy on my mind, threatening to break the easy rhythm.
Matt watches me closely, his own burger forgotten for the moment as he sees me disappear inside my head again.
“Are you sure you’re okay?” he asks again, his eyes look between mine. “You seem… I don’t know, you're acting weird.” He tries to find the right words.
"Matt..." I go to dismiss him, getting up slowly but he cuts me off, standing up too.
"No, I'm serious. You've been acting weird for days, and I'm no longer 2000 miles away for you to push me away or avoid me." He steps closer to me, trapping me against the counter with his arms on either side of me.
"Is it about your grandma? Did something else happen while I was gone?" He throws out, looking between my eyes.
"I–" I try to speak up but my voice gets caught in my throat and I get lost in the icy storm of his relentless gaze.
"It's not just my grandma," I manage to say, the admission causing him to soften slightly, a glimmer of relief at the small breakthrough.
"Okay, so talk to me, sweetheart. Please, I've been worried sick about you. You have no idea," he pleads, his breath brushing against my skin.
"I didn't know how to tell you..." I try to put together my words but I feel like I'm making it all worse.
I watch as his eyebrows pinch together and he leans down more so he's eye level with me instead towering over me.
"Tell me what, kid. I'm not a mind reader," His voice strains, frustration evident in his face.
When I try to break eye contact with him he pulls my chin to align our eyes again.
"What, d'you crash my car?" he guesses, clearly joking, his eyebrows raising playfully.
I can't help but smile and snort at his attempt to ease the tension.
"No, it’s not that," I say, my voice cracking slightly. "It's much bigger than that," I trail off and he waits expectantly.
"I uh– I went to the doctor yesterday," I pause and study his face, which drops ever so slightly, seeming to be bracing himself.
He stays silent, whether it was out of patience or fear, nothing could have prepared for my next sentence.
"I went to confirm that I was pregnant," I finally blurt out, my voice shaky, and he freezes.
Not one muscle moves in his face or his body.
"You're..." His voice cracks and he clears his dry throat, hitting his chest, "Are you serious?"
"I'm seven weeks, or a month and a half," I stammer, my voice wavering. "I don't really know how to—"
"Seven..." He whispers in disbelief, the shock settling in and I nod. "Y-you were on birth control– you have that AED–"
"IUD, yes, I did. It still happened, that shit is useless if it moves out of place," I explain and he looks down between us.
"A-and everything's okay, you're okay?" He looks up at me again, holding onto my face.
I take hold of his wrists, rubbing my thumb over his skin.
"I'm fine, the baby's fine..." I say softly and his eyes widen in realization as he pales.
"Oh my fucking god," He pulls back, cupping his hands over his mouth. "I need to sit down."
"Okay, okay. Do you want water?" I panic, hoping he doesn't pass out or puke.
He takes a seat at the dining table, shaking his head before taking off his hat and leaning his elbows on his knees.
"Oh my god, I thought I was crazy..." He says, his voice cracking with nerves as he presses his palms into his eye sockets.
"What?" I ask, confused.
"I had a feeling all fucking week," he says, his voice still shaky, and my brows knit together.
"I knew something was up. You were acting different. You were moodier than usual, you were napping all the time—and you never nap... and your tits are huge," he adds, and I roll my eyes.
"Sorry, that’s beside the point," he continues quickly, "I just couldn’t shake the feeling that you could be... I think I was trying to convince myself you weren't, but then you were so sick before I left," he rambles, staring blankly at the wall.
"It's a lot to take in, I know." I swallow thickly as I watch him process everything.
"You're pregnant," he says finally, looking at me again, this time with tears brimming his eyes. "And you were dealing with all of this by yourself," His voice is low and I shake my head, moving to stand between his legs, cupping his face gently.
"Hey, no. None of that... How could you have known?" I shush him and pull his head towards my chest.
His hands rest behind my thighs, his thumb lightly stroking my right leg. I run my fingers through his hair, comforting him as much as he's comforting me.
"I've been so scared to tell you..." I confess softly and he pulls back slightly, looking up at me with his brows furrowed.
"I know this wasn't part of our plan...at least not for a while. But before I took a test, the night my grandma passed, I had a dream. I was here, in my grandmother's garden... and she told me I was pregnant. Matt, the feeling I had," I pause, struggling to find the right words.
"It was the most intense, pure form of happiness I've ever felt. I can't even describe it to you..." I trail off.
I shake my head, "I know, I sound crazy. But I think this was meant to happen." I whisper, heat creeping up my neck at the admission.
He’s silent for a moment, absorbing my words. Then, a slow smirk carves a crease into the side of his mouth. "You are fucking crazy…" he murmurs, his playful tone breaking the tension as his smile lines deepen.
I huff a breathy laugh, the sound catching in my throat as my emotions take over again. Tears blur my vision, and I can’t hold them back any longer.
"Are you mad?" I squeak, letting my fear slip through the dam I built up.
He's immediately shaking his head, his eyes widen with sincerity, "Mad? Of course not. I mean, I thought we'd maybe get a cat first but..." He says, quirking his lip and I can't help the laugh that escapes through a sob.
I was the definition of an emotional wreck.
He gently squeezes my hips as I tip my head back to collect myself.
"Look at me," he says firmly, and I sniffle and hiccup before forcing myself to look at him. "Am I surprised? Yes. Terrified? Definitely. But, not even close to mad."
He wipes my tears tenderly, "We're going to be okay. Take it easy, alright? Deep breaths," His tone gentle but assertive, dragging me out of the pit of my dark thoughts.
I sigh as his thumbs draw circles on the exposed skin on my hips.
"I'm sorry," I say and he pulls me to sit sideways on his lap this time.
"Why are you sorry?" he asks softly, intertwining our fingers and bringing my hand to his mouth for a kiss.
"Our lives are going to change and I feel like it's my fault,"
"C'mere," He pulls me in fully, wrapping his arms around my waist. "I love you, and we're going to get through this... We were gonna do it anyway; we're just getting a headstart, yeah? Everything is going to work out," He tells me softly and I can tell he means every word.
Matt never says anything he doesn't mean.
"Also, don't say stupid shit like this is your fault. Last time I checked, it takes two to tango," He says firmly, lightly slapping my hip.
I nod, swallowing the lump in my throat as I lean into him completely, resting my head on his shoulder. His hand rubs gentle circles on my back, and I close my eyes, letting myself soak in the comfort of his presence.
"I missed you so much," I whisper, my voice muffled against his shirt. "I've been so sick, this kid might be trying to kill me," I try to joke, and he breathes a laugh into my shoulder.
A few beats of silence pass, broken only by the distant sound of crickets outside and the occasional creak of the old house settling.
"We're having a kid," He speaks up, realization laced in his voice and I hum against him. "Maybe we're both fucking crazy,"
I stifle a laugh and pull back to look at him, "D'wanna see it?" I ask, getting up from his lap and he looks to my stomach with a raised brow.
"Kid, you're not showing yet," he says, leaning back into the chair with his arms crossed, a playful smirk on his face and I roll my eyes.
"No, the ultrasound. Hold on," I say as I head to the counter to grab the pictures from my bag.
I pull out the strip of photos, and when I turn back, I see Matt standing up and stretching. He takes off his sweatshirt and his shirt riding up slightly, exposing a sliver of his stomach. Heat rises to my face but I can't stare too long though because he's walking towards me to look over my shoulder.
"Okay, what am I lookin' at?" He stands behind me, his hands on his hips as his head tilts in concentration.
"You see this black circle here?" I point to the sonogram, and he leans in closer, his breath warm against my neck as he grabs hold of the paper to steady it.
"Yeah, that's it?" He asks, narrowing his eyes and I giggle.
"No, do you see the tinier white blob inside it? That's the baby." I explain and his face scrunches for a second, looking at the picture again.
"No fucking way," he says in disbelief, a wide smile breaking across his face. "That tiny thing?" His voice raises a pitch as he looks at me, eyes wide with awe, "Can barely fucking see that," He says playfully before rubbing his eyes.
"Mhm," I can't help but giggle as he wraps an arm around me, pulling me in and placing a kiss to my temple. "Just wait til you hear it, the heartbeat was insane. It was so fast," I add and he freezes.
The realization in his face settles in even deeper as I tell him that, his soft smile returning.
"You heard the heartbeat?" He whispers, looking between my eyes and I nod.
"Yeah, yesterday. They emailed me the video of it, I'll show you in a bit if you want," I tell him and he kisses me then like he can't help himself.
"That's fucking nuts... do you feel pregnant?" he asks, his voice curious and his eyes slowly lowering to my stomach peaking out of my tank top.
I shake my head, "Not at all. I just feel like shit... and constantly bloated," I admit, laughing softly.
He lightly chuckles himself, a charmed smile on his face as he reaches to rubs my stomach a couple times.
"We're really gonna have to lock in, kid." He moves around me to pull me into a full hug, pressing our stomachs together.
"Okay, gamer...acting like this is a video game," I scoff teasingly and he bends down, laughing into my neck.
"Well, what else do you want me to say? We're leveling up in life–" he continues the joke and I jab his side with my finger.
"Ow," he fake-cries, clutching his side with exaggerated pain before breaking into a fit of giggles.
"Stop saying corny shit, you goof," I warn, though his laughter makes it impossible not to smile.
I bury my face in his chest, my ear pressed against his heart as we settle into a comfortable silence.
"Now we really gotta get our own place," He says and I can hear his smirk.
"I don't know…" I shrug slightly, considering. "Maybe it wouldn’t be a bad idea to stick around for a bit. It might be nice to have the extra help before we go completely on our own."
He pulls back slightly to look at me, tilting his head with an inquisitive expression. "You really think my brothers will be any help? They don’t know anything about babies."
I snort. “Probably not, but neither do we." I reason and his mouth shrugs in defeat.
"Good point... I guess we can wait it out, we're not in a rush. It'll definitely give us more time to research where would want to be somewhat permanently," He points out.
I hum into him and try not stress about that. The reality is we'd be putting ourselves in a tough spot—both our families are here on the East Coast, but our jobs and lives are rooted in LA.
It's easy to go back and forth when it was just us, but now we're gonna have a kid.
"I already hear your mind racing," his voice breaks me out of my thoughts as he rubs my back. "Don't worry, we'll figure it out..." he says softly, and I sigh deeply.
My stomach turns when I get a whiff of the food still laid out on the table.
"Matt," I say, pulling back slowly, holding my stomach.
"Mm?" he hums, looking at me with concern as I put my hand over my mouth.
"The smell of those burgers is making me sick now," I try not to laugh, and he shakes his head, immediately tossing all the trash into the large paper bag it came in.
"Alright, where's the incinerator?"
#matt sturniolo#matthew sturniolo#chris sturniolo#christopher sturniolo#nicolas sturniolo#nick sturniolo#sturniolo triplets#sturniolo x reader#the sturniolo triplets#matt sturniolo fanfic#sturniolo fanfic#matthew sturniolo x reader#dad!matt#sturniolohouse
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too tired. -m.s.
⭐️hey sluts!⭐️
warnings: softdom!reader, kind of sub!matt, riding, praising, sleepy sex, cockwarming, unprotected p in v (WRAP YO SHIT UP!!!!), no use of y/n bc i hate it🤞
synopsis: after slightly ignoring matt before bed, you show him that you can be just as much of a tease as him.
a/n: HIIIII!!! sooo this is my first fic so i’m so very sorry if it’s bad!! but i’m so excited for y’all to read this is not even funny. anyways, enjoy!!
it wasn’t out of the ordinary for matt to stay up late. it was actually more than normal. especially if he were playing video games.
it was 2 am. 2:06 am, to be exact. you were laying in matt’s bed, doom-scrolling tiktok half-asleep as matt was focused on fortnite with nick and chris. they weren’t filming anything, but every few nights, they like to get nostalgic and just play video games all night.
“chris, you’re too fucking loud.” matt exclaims.
“no, i’m not!” chris retaliates, which you hear through the floor and matt’s headset.
matt turns back to you with a “can you believe this kid?” look on his face.
you giggle when you see matt gesturing to his headset and shaking his head.
you go look back at your phone as matt yawns while stretching, reaching his arms up. his shirt lifted a little, exposing his boxers under his blue pajama pants.
he caught you staring, realizing what simple things had an effect on you. the ball was in his court. although you loved the idea of late night sex, you didn’t know how matt would feel.
so, you just laid there, waiting until you physically couldn’t stay awake.
matt saw your eyes flutter open and closed, how your hand would slowly droop down the whip back up when your eyes opened.
he came over, shut off your phone, pulled up your blanket, and kissed you on the forehead.
just then, you heard matt whisper over his headset.
“hey, she’s falling asleep, and i’m feeling pretty tired. goodnight.” matt states.
“aww, goodnight matty.” nick replies.
chris, being chris, replies with, “yeah, you’re gonna go to ‘sleep’.”
matt rolls his eyes as nick laughs. he ends the conversation and turns his whole setup off.
you feel his mattress dip from behind you, right as you feel two warm arms wrap around your waist from behind.
his touch wasn’t helping the thoughts you were having right now. you wanted him. but didn’t even wanna open your eyes.
to send a signal, you started to adjust how you were laying, carefully moving your hips to perfectly rub against matt’s hips and thighs.
your subconscious must’ve known what was gonna happen to you tonight, as you went to bed in matt’s baggy briefs and one of his shirts.
no underwear, no bra.
you were more comfortable that way, and so was matt.
matt groaned quietly as he slowly moved his head into the crook of your neck, leaving soft pecks.
“goodnight, my girl. i love you.”
you didn’t respond.
matt was a little offended by the loud silence that followed his sentence.
“baby? you already asleep?”
honestly, you were about to be.
a soft groan left you as you shook your head.
“what’s wrong?” he asked.
“nothin’. just too tired to even think right now.”
he knew when something was wrong.
the way your voice got low, your head would lightly shake side to side with every “reassuring” sentence, and how you’d lack in responses in total.
“well, somethin’ is wrong. tell me, baby. what’s on your mind?”
you could feel him getting hard as you kept adjusting your hips.
every. single. inch.
“if you don’t tell me what’s wrong, then i’m just gonna go to bed.”
silence.
“alright. your choice.”
you felt him turn over as his arms left your side.
you just ignored him.
bad idea.
“wait.”
you turned onto your back, leaning on your elbows as you tried to peek at matt’s face.
he didn’t even move.
“matt. baby.”
no response.
boy, did that pill hurt to swallow.
“baby, i’m ready to talk. amongst.. other.. things.”
you were hoping he was gonna catch your drift.
you assumed he did when he only turned his head to look up at you. the dim light coming from a warm, vanilla candle on his desk made him look more irresistible.
“what.. other things?”
“baby. you know what i’m talking about.”
“mmm. not too sure i am.”
he put on a smug look, acting stupid.
that’s how he would punish you.
whenever you would tease him or treat him like he was the needy one in public.
you sat fully up, now leaning on your left hand, still looking down at him.
“i wanna.. you know..”
“ohh.”
maybe he would be nice and give in tonight.
“mmh. too tired.”
nevermind.
“matt!”
you whisper-yelled. loud enough to grab his attention, but quiet enough that you couldn’t even hear it in nick or chris’ room.
“look, i’m sorry i ignored you earlier. i really am! but-“
“but what?”
his deep voice made you feel knots in your stomach.
the way his curls laid perfectly on his head.
the way his tattoos complimented his veins.
everything about him made you snap out of your sleepy haze.
you reached over to his hip, pulling him flat on his back.
you swept your leg over his hips, leaving you perfectly sat onto his lap.
he acted tough, but you knew you could make him do anything you wanted.
“the fuck do you think you’re doing?”
matt’s voice was stern, but you knew he wasn’t actually upset.
how?
by the way the bulge underneath your core was getting harder and harder.
“i’m sorry for ignoring you.”
you left a kiss on his neck.
“i’m sorry for not switching the laundry earlier.”
then his collarbone.
“i’m sorry for not being a good girlfriend.”
then his chest, with the collar of his shirt lightly pulled down to give you easy access.
you didn’t actually think you were a bad girlfriend, but you weren’t trying to guilt him.
you were teasing him.
his least and most favorite thing in the world.
“no, baby. you’re all i want and more.”
matt’s hands caressed your sides.
once he reached up high enough, he realized you didn’t have a bra on.
you could see his excitement.
and feel it.
“then prove it.”
he immediately sat up and pulled his shirt off.
it was like out of a movie.
sloppy kisses as you both started to get undressed.
next thing you know, you’re completely naked and all he has on is his boxers.
“can you take your boxers off for me? i need you as close to me as possible.”
you pushed yourself up slightly on your knees, giving him enough room to slip his boxers off and throw them somewhere on his floor.
he laid back, giving you the sweetest puppy dog eyes you’d ever seen.
you grabbed his length, teasing your own entrance, knowing it was just as bad for him.
you kept eye contact the entire time, making sure to see his eyebrows furrow as soon as he was inside of you.
once he was, it was like he had melted.
slow, sultry movements of your hips was enough to make him twitch.
low groans had left his mouth, making you closer and closer the the edge.
after a few minutes of little praises from both of you, you both felt your highs getting closer and closer.
“just like that.”
“you’re doing great for me, baby.”
“look at my pretty girl.”
matt’s hands gripped his sheets, proving his release was getting closer and closer.
the sight of his veins was enough to make you moan his name.
he looked up at you, praying his brothers didn’t hear.
not that he would be too upset if they did.
“can i- mmph..”
you were waiting for him to ask, as you needed to release the knot in your stomach.
“go ahead, baby.”
you felt the warmth of his release inside of you, mixed with your own.
you slumped over, laying on his chest.
he played with your hair while you both attempted to catch your breath.
light sweat was making his hair stick to his forehead.
you lightly kissed his chest, feeling his heartbeat.
you felt safe with him.
the way he was never ashamed to open up to you, nor was he judgemental when you opened up to him.
“can i.. maybe.. keep it in? y’know, while we sleep?”
“let’s clean up, then of course. anything for my pretty boy.”
after you showered together, with light kisses and washing eachothers bodies, you went back to bed.
you stayed undressed.
as he slipped back into you, eliciting light moans from both of you, he wrapped his arms back around your waist.
“was that enough proof? or should i give you more?”
you chuckled, knowing how tomorrow morning would start.
#matt sturniolo#matt sturniolo x reader#matt sturniolo smut#matt stuniolo fanfic#matt sturniolo fluff#sturniolo triplets#matthew sturniolo#matt x reader#matt sturniolo fanfiction#Spotify
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movie night | choi seungcheol (m)
title: movie night pairing: seungcheol x (f)reader genre/rating: established relationship, pwp; 18+ summary: You’re definitely still mad at him, but he’s so hot. wc: 1.6k warnings: mentions horror movies and stuff, reader is trying to “i’m scared” her way into getting some dick, mentions periods/pms, kissing, missionary, makeup sex, big dick!cheol, unprotected sex, they’re so cute lol, i think that’s all note: i wrote this one day bc i was in my feelings lol. i hope you like this little october parting gift. it’s unedited bc i've been super busy so i apologize for my trash lol.
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“That’s not my scarecrow.”
You clutch your blanket close to your body as you sit surrounded by darkness on your living room couch. Your boyfriend, Seungcheol, is seated beside you. Although he’s only inches away it seems like you’re miles apart emotionally.
There haven’t been too many words exchanged between you over the past few days. You can’t recall the subject of the argument, or the catalyst—but you’re days away from your period and if you’re being honest, deep down, you miss your man.
However, you’re as stubborn as they come. Hoisting your white flag isn’t an option for you. He’s usually the one who resolves these things. You can’t understand why all of a sudden he has to match your energy. He’s doing this on purpose to torture you.
As you stare at the screen, already knowing what is in store for the elderly woman with the shotgun in hand, mischief creeps its way into your mind—conjuring a sinister but genius plan to grant you some of your boyfriend’s attention. You’ve seen this movie more times than you can count, and have added it to your Top 10; but tonight, you’ll pretend it is too much for your poor little heart.
After the gunshots, the TV is dark and quiet, and then suddenly the lady appears. She comes closer and closer to her front porch, her cats screeching and scurrying in fear as they lay eyes on a sight not visible to the pair of stranded siblings and the movie viewers. You hold your breath, waiting for the perfect moment—and then, it happens.
The creature drops the woman’s limp body and reveals himself, leaving everyone shocked by the sudden character death. You pretend to be frightened by the jumpscare, purposefully shifting closer to Seungcheol as you bounce out of your seat with your false fear.
Instead of offering one of his strong arms for comfort, you’re given a cold side-eye, but the failed attention doesn’t falter your determination. You wait for another startling scene, and once again, you stage a dramatic reaction. This time, whether it’s out of annoyance or concern is unknown, he acknowledges you.
“Scared?”
Timidly, you offer a small nod. You secretly hope it is as feeble as you strived for it to be.
“Come here,” he beckons, opening his arms for you to come over and snuggle against his chest.
You leap at the opportunity faster than you intended, but he either doesn’t notice or just chooses not to say anything. Once you’re next to him, head resting on his chest while your leg is thrown over his lap—he wraps his right arm around you and surrounds you with warmth. You smile, but only until the movie is over.
After about 30 minutes, the credits roll, and the movie is over. You stretch, knowing it’s time to go get some sleep because you have work in the morning. As you stand and start walking to your bedroom, you’re puzzled when you don’t hear the familiar sound of Seungcheol dragging his feet behind you.
“You’re not coming?” you ask, turning around to see if there’s any sign of him preparing for bed.
Unfortunately, he seems comfortable where he is. It’s not like he has work tomorrow, like you. However, you always move to the bedroom at the same time. You’re taken aback by the random change of plans.
“Later.”
You hope the darkness conceals your disappointment. Tomorrow morning you’ll wake up horny, but you’ll probably die if someone touches you while you’re PMSing. You want to fuck now, so tomorrow your hormones won’t be all over the place, but you won’t ask. Your pride is too high.
“Okay. Well, goodnight.”
“Night, baby,” he replies, not even watching your defeated figure walk away.
Your legs carry you to your room and you fall on the bed face first, burying your head in the comforter to mask your sigh of frustration. You aren’t sure how long you lie there, but you begin to fall asleep. However, the sound of your boyfriend’s voice makes you jolt with surprise.
“Shit! What the fuck!”
His laughter fills the room, but you don’t find anything funny. He nearly scared your soul out of your body. You send a pillow flying towards his head.
“When did you become such a pussy?” he asks, catching the object in mid-air.
“Shut up, you just startled me.”
“Sure, I did. Did the movie startle you too?”
Rolling your eyes, you return your head to the covers, shielding yourself from his teasing. You don’t bother making room for him because you’re still a little pissed. You figure he’ll just leave you alone and sleep on the couch but then his cold fingertips touch the back of your thigh and your mood changes drastically.
They begin to travel across your exposed skin, eventually crawling under your large t-shirt, a “borrowed” item of his. You can only imagine the look on his face when he finds nothing but panties underneath. Sure, he knows how you sleep, but he probably wasn’t expecting you to dress so conveniently tonight.
You exhale a soft moan as his fingers tickle your inner thighs, and he’s quick to notice the way you’ve crumbled in a matter of seconds.
“I mean… it’s okay to be scared, baby.”
“I’m not scared, asshole,” you mumble into the fabric. “Just go back to the—”
“Want me to ease your mind?” When silence falls over the room, he mistakes it for rejection and withdraws his hand. “I’ll sleep on the couch.”
Your reaction leaves him smirking, but you don’t care how desperate you appear.
“No, come to bed,” you insist, grabbing his shirt.
As he slips one of his arms around your waist you pull him closer, making his knees hit the edge of the bed.
“Is that what you want?”
You nod. “Yeah.”
It only takes seconds before your lips connect for a slow and gentle kiss. It’s a silent peace offering, a surrender to all the desires you both have held onto out of stubbornness. Seungcheol naturally gains all the control, using his dominance to take the lead. His confidence earns your submission, and you allow him to gently guide you back on the bed.
Climbing on top of you, he can’t bear to pull away. He removes his shirt in a swift motion, tossing it across the room while he continues his trail of kisses down your neck. Your body arches off the bed as he removes your panties, aiding him by kicking your legs until they slip off your ankles. Once you are bare, you spread your legs for him and he settles between your thighs.
“Look at you,” he taunts, leaving you squirming beneath him. “Not so bratty now, huh?”
Seungcheol’s hand finally touches your pussy, leaving you gasping for air. Words get trapped in your throat, making you croak out responses to the pleasure you’re feeling between your legs.
“Please.”
Your begging grasps his attention and he pauses briefly to look into your eyes.
“What are you asking for?”
He continues to slowly massage your clit, causing your crevice to become soaked with your arousal. You hear the lewd sounds it makes as he dips his fingers in and out of your heat. It’s almost shameful, but there’s no room for modesty in your bedroom.
“This,” you say clearly while your palm presses firmly against his crotch. His dick feels hard and solid; even through his thick sweatpants. You’re pleased to know you aren’t the only one eager for some relief.
Seungcheol hisses in agony as your hand lazily strokes his sensitive length. His sculpted forearms tremble as he struggles to hold up his weight while watching the scene unfold.
“I need it.”
In an instant, your wish is granted. He springs into action by standing up and pulling down his pants and underwear in one motion. You prop yourself on your elbows so you can watch the way his dick stands at attention, begging to fill your soddened center.
Seconds later, he returns, climbing on top of you and lowering his head. As you chase each other’s lips, you feel him near your opening. Your hips rise off the bed, trying to meet his tip so he can sink into your warmth.
You gasp when he slips inside, relieved that the teasing is now over. Wrapping your limbs around his body, you pull him closer, wanting to feel his lips on you once more.
Your moans pour into each other’s mouths as your boyfriend begins fucking you with deep thrusts. You hold onto him tightly while he whispers the filthiest things in the sweetest ways you’ll ever hear.
He brings you closer and closer to your peak with every snap of his hips. The tension building in your core starts to become unbearable. Seungcheol can feel the way you’re clenching around him and delivers his final thrusts with precision.
As your cries of pleasure fill the dark bedroom, you can hear the neighbors banging on the wall. Both of you laugh, knowing a nasty note will be left on your door in the morning.
“Can you do me a favor?” he asks.
You nod, of course. “Anything.”
Feeling invincible in your post-orgasmic high, you’re ready to take on the world.
“The next time you wanna act scared, pick a movie you haven’t watched a thousand times.”
Instead of throwing another pillow at him, you smack him with it instead. He falls over dramatically, but his giggles can’t be controlled. You can only roll your eyes and take his advice.
Damn. He knows you too well.
---
If anyone can guess which movie they were watching without using Google, I will hug you lol.
#seungcheol x reader#seungcheol smut#scoups x reader#scoups smut#seventeen smut#seventeen x reader#s coups x reader#s coups smut#seventeen fanfic#seventeen imagine#scoups fanfic#scoups imagines#seungcheol imagine#aaagustd.fics
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hi!!!! if you’re still writing for remus, i was wondering if u could write something like rem and reader being super close friends and they just realize they have feelings for each other in a not very dramatic way, just kind of like, i love this closeness and i want more of it way?
sorry if i’m not good at requesting english isn’t my first language!!!!
Your English is perfect babe! Don’t worry about that! I hope you enjoy this Remus x best friend!reader on their weekly sleepover with a sleepy love confession ᡣ𐭩
“Did you see that new realty show about the girls who make more than their husbands?”
You ask Remus as he hands you a cup of tea. You’re curled up on his sofa, feet tucked neatly under you as you scroll through tv programs.
“No I haven’t seen it. Did you start it yet, dove?”
Remus sits beside you, the bottoms of your feet pressed into his thighs.
“No, I started one episode and fell asleep.”
Remus laughs, “That’s not a good sell,” you smile sheepishly.
You and Remus do this every Saturday- meet at either of your houses for lunch that turns into dinner and dessert and sleeping over cuddled next to each other.
You both swear you’re not in love with each other to your friends, but as his hand falls to your ankle and tugs your feet into his lap, you know it’s not true.
In turn, Remus knows that you’re in love with each other by the way you look at him as his thumbs press into the arches of your foot and your foot stretches into his palm.
“It was going pretty well, I was just so knackered.” A yawn tears apart your words as if to prove your point.
Remus nods sagely, taking a sip of his tea to hide his smile.
“Start it up then dovey,” you click the first episode with a pleased look on your face.
“If I fall asleep here please wake me.”
Remus rolls his eyes and you scowl, “You hurt your back the last time.”
Remus scoffs, “I did not! It was just rained that night so my muscles hurt a little extra.”
“Well I don’t want them to hurt any extra tonight, Rem.”
He nods, but you’re suspicious.
Remus watches one episode all by himself because you barely make it past the 15 minute mark.
It’s no matter to him, because he gets the chance to really look at you and feel his heart galloping in his chest without feeling like his face will give his feelings away.
Your eyebrows as without a furrow, which is strange for your seemingly permanent semi-frown, your cheek smushed under your hand and your lips all the more pouty for it. God he wishes he could just give you a quick peck.
Instead, he busies himself with cleaning up- putting your mugs in the dishwasher, wiping his counters down and going to his room to unmake the bed a bit.
His touch is featherlight as it graces your cheek, “Bedtime, precious girl.”
His hands slip under you and you rouse, a bleariness that can only come about by waking from a deep sleep making Remus smile.
“You’re so stubborn.” Sleep eats through your words, like molasses dribbling off a spoon. Remus kisses your temple.
“You’re adorable,” he lays you down on your side of the bed and you look at him with much more severity for your play argument.
“I think I’m in love with you Remus.” The words escape you with no pretenses or fanfare- just the simple, love infused words.
Remus’ hands stutter where they’re pulling your favoured blanket over you.
He kneels down and you twist under the sheets to face him, his hand cups your cheek, thumb stroking all the creases there from your palm resting there.
“I know I’m in love with you too dove, but I’d like to take you out on a proper date tomorrow if you don’t mind.”
You smile wide and bright for a night only half illuminated by the moon, “I don’t mind in the slightest.” Remus’ smile mirrors your own. He spends a couple minutes stroking your face, your eyes fluttering shut heavily. “Would you come up here? Give your knees a break, Rem.”
He scoffs a laugh, “You’re so bossy.” His lips brush your cheeks and then your nose.
“Wait I want a real kiss first.” He laughs outright then. His lips parting to puff air on your face as he does.
“No wait for our date,” you whine and pout all with your eyes closed, it’s then and instantly Remus realises he’ll never be able to deny you because he coos and tilts your face towards him. “One kiss.”
You parrot, “One kiss.”
Remus’ lips press into yours softly, soft and not more than a peck but it satisfies you. His knees crack as he stands, slipping into his side of the bed before you can say anything.
You turn to face Remus, bodies pressed close. His hand drags up and down your back, settling you. “You’re spoilt rotten already and it’s only going to get worse.” He murmurs fondly as you fall asleep, his smile hard to tame.
#remuslupin#remus lupin#remus lupin one shot#remus lupin oneshot#remus lupin drabble#remus lupin imagine#remus lupin fic#remus lupin headcanon#remus lupin fanfic#remus lupin fanfiction#remus lupin fluff#remus lupin blurb#remus lupin x black reader#remus lupin x reader#remus lupin x you#remus lupin x yn#remus lupin x y/n
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ONLY YOURS.
ETHAN LANDRY - KINKTOBER 24 — OCT.4TH — M.LIST.
cw: exhibitionism, cnc, phone sex, bully reader x loser!ethan
It’s late, there’s a movie playing in the background of your living room as you head on to the kitchen, you’re only wearing a long tee and some pretty lingerie underneath it, your hand reaches for the wooden spoon that rests on the marbled counter before moving it to stir the vegetables on the pan. You hear your phone ringing and reach to grab it, the other side of the line is nothing but silence before you speak.
“Hello?” You question, holding the phone against your ear.
“Thought you wouldn’t pick up.” The voice is heavily modified, you can almost feel a chill running down your back.
“Well, I did.” You answer, placing down the phone on the counter before putting it on speaker. “Who is this?”
He doesn’t reply to that. “What are you cooking?”
You frown, chuckle before looking around you, your windows are closed, curtains too. “How do you know I’m… cooking?” You raise a brow.
“Same way I think those panties look good on you,” he chuckles, that menacing voice makes you feel a shiver down your back, you pause for a moment, turning your head to the side.
“Listen — I think you have the wrong number so I’m hanging up.” You put out bluntly, he can hear the way your voice shivers when you turn off the stove.
“You hang up on me and I’m gutting you!” He says quickly, furiously, you freeze next to your phone. “Not so funny now, are you? Do your friends know you’re not as tough as you seem?”
You don’t know who’s behind the phone but it’s more than a prank call, he knows you personally, knows your friends — damn it, he’s talking about them! You know you’ve been a bitch to most people on campus but you didn’t think any of them would want to kill you for it.
“Is this some kind joke?” You laugh nervously, you wished it would be a joke, just a stupid Halloween prank.
“You think it is?” He asks, you stay silent. “You wanna know what the real joke is? You spend every single day ruining my life on that campus just to act like a scared little girl now.”
Silence fills up the room and you turn red, it’s obvious now who the caller is, but you didn’t think that the nerdy guy in your class would be a psychotic serial killer.
“What, refreshed your memory?” He laughs again.
“E — Ethan?” Your face flashes in terror.
“Damn right, and if you wanna live tonight, I suggest we play a little game.”
You want to hang up this phone so damn bad, but the promise of being killed for it makes you comply to his wishes, so you sigh, a single whisper out loud.
“Fine.” You swallow dry, grab the device in your hands.
“Go upstairs to your bedroom.” He commands, you hesitate. “Make it quick.”
You grab your phone and walk up the stairs like he says, when entering the room, he gives you another command.
“Close the door,” you do so. “Good. Now strip.”
“W — What?”
“Listen, doll, I can come up in that room and slice you open right now and we both know you’ve thought about it, haven’t you?”
You breathe in nervously because deep down, you know you have, you think maybe that’s why you always bicker with him, because it’s more than trying to look good for your friends, it’s attraction to that stupid face of is, so you strip, every piece of clothing discarded on the floor and he’s smiling through the phone.
“Mhm...” He hums, a low mutter as if he’s appreciating the sight. “Get on the bed, let me see that pretty pussy.”
You get on the bed, lay down on your sheets, the window is cracked open, the breeze brushes against every piece of your body, it makes your nipples harden in the process, he wishes he was there to fuck you the way he wants to, but he can’t risk it now.
“Spread your legs.”
Your hands move to your legs, you part your thighs and spread them directly at the window across from your bed.
“Look at that, you’re wet.” He notes with menacing grin, your fingers twitch around your thighs. “Play with yourself.”
Ethan’s more demanding than he’s ever been, it’s scary even if endearing at the same time, it makes you just want to obey, and you don’t know what it is about him but it’s making you reach a finger and slide it up your slit so it meets the little pearl in between your folds. “That’s better, just imagine I’m there.”
You slide a finger in, his eyes watch you so intensely that no matter where he is, you can feel his gaze on you.
“My pretty little slut, look at you.”
a/n: not my favorite one of kinktober but bare with me
taglist: @waltzthing @stayonmars @notoakay @fae-of-prey @baileebear
#ethan landry x you#ethan landry fanfiction#ethan landry x y/n#ethan landry smut#ethan landry fic#ethan landry x fem!reader#ethan landry fluff#ethan landry scream#ethan landry imagine#ethan landry x reader#ethan landry#jack champion x y/n#jack champion fluff#jack champion scream#jack champion imagine#jack champion x reader#jack champion smut#halloween#ghostface x y/n#ghostface x you#ghostface smut#ghostface imagine#ghostface x reader#kinktober 2024#slasher smut#slasher movies#scream smut#𝜗𝜚: ethan landry#𝜗𝜚: kinktober#webbluvrsugar
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Advent calendar: Day 5. Alien discovers Christmas
A/N: This is for all the anons asking me for more Fem x Fem stories, but mainly it's for myself bc I love the idea of a female alien taking me away. Enjoy!
Fem!alien x fem!reader || 69-ing, oral sex, sensory deprivation (blindfolds), soft dom/sub
“What do you mean there’s a big human coming into your house as you sleep!? That’s burglary!” You suppress a laugh, trying not to be mean at her obvious confusion. “How can you be so calm about this? I need to get my weapons, I need to prepare for this big red man that’s going to come and enter our house. I need to protect you,” she was spiraling into a frenzy.
You get up, standing right in front of her, grabbing her face in your hands and making her lean down so you can stare into her completely white eyes as you say: “Hey, hey. Calm down. It’s not a real man, okay? It’s a kid’s tale. An excuse for humans to give each other presents and believe there’s a bit of magic and joy in the world, okay?” She breathes a bit easier after the explanation and you congratulate yourself for a crisis averted. One more point for the human, yay!
“Then you are lying to your young?” She asks, once again confused with what you just said, which is very valid because when you put it like that it does sound a bit weird.
You think about it and let out a chuckle. “Yeah, we kind of are.”
“That seems rude and mean. They are so tiny and weak…” She looks almost disgusted when she says it, as if the mere thought of kids repulses her. You have to hug her and hide your face in her neck to avoid bursting out laughing. She’s so funny without even trying to, you can feel the love you feel for her filling every crevice of your heart.
But then you remember. “Do you want your present now? Normally we don’t open them till morning, but you aren’t human so… We can make our own rules.” Truth be told, you only want her to open the present because the possessive tone and willingness to protect you made you kind of hot. And her present involved a lot of hotness in your future.
“You have a present?” She asks, surprised.
“Oh yeah… A present you are going to love,” you tell her with a smirk. She looks at you and responds with another smirk of her own, her very long and pointy fangs showing and making a tremor run down your back. Fuck, she’s so hot in all her otherworldliness.
“Is that so, my love?” You bet she already knows it’s going to be something sexual, but you don’t care she knows, it’s not a surprise that you enjoy her body as often as possible, you are obsessed with your alien girlfriend. Who could blame you? She’s gorgeous.
You pull away from her body and start taking out her clothes. “Let’s go to our room and I’ll show you…” You take everything and when her pants are around her knees, you exclaim: “Race you!” You know you are playing dirty as she gets out a curse behind you. You laugh all the way to the bedroom.
You make it to the room and she’s there not two seconds later, a trail of clothes in the hallway as she enters the room with a predatory look in her eyes. But that’s not in your plans for tonight.
She’s usually the one in charge, but you want this to be about her. That’s your gift, a whole night pleasuring only her. “Lay down, eyes closed,” you order, trying to be as authoritative as possible (which isn’t much). She lets out a chuckle, making you smile at her as she complies.
Both of you know she could overpower you at any time, her physique so much better than yours. But you also know she’s not going to do it, and that makes you even hotter. It’s exhilarating to know such a powerful alien would surrender all the power and trust to a human like you, it makes your pussy tingle in anticipation of what’s to come.
“I’m going to cover your eyes so you can’t see anything, okay?” She nods, her eyes still closed, her hands pinned to the bed as you caress the sides of her body until she shivers. She’s so pretty you want to scream.
You cover her eyes with the silk ribbon you bought for this special occasion, it has wintery motives and you loved it when you saw it, already picturing it against her pale blue-ish skin. It looks better than you expected against her skin, and you want nothing else but to lean down and kiss her breathless.
So you do. You two kiss until her hands find your ass and she starts groping you. You pull away with a laugh, taking her hands back to the bed. “Nothing of that, this is about you.” She nods in understanding, but you don’t have to see her eyes to know that’s not the end of the discussion. But she doesn’t say anything as you start touching her naked body.
She twitches when your cold fingers find her flower shaped nipples, startled for a second, and you grin in triumph. You travel your fingers down her body, tracing the patters of her war tattoos as she gasps every time you go over one of her sensitive ridges. It’s so hot to see her so pliant and vulnerable, you are dripping wet already.
She speaks up as you kiss the side of her hip, making you stop for a second at her words: “I can smell your desire, my love… Let me do something about it.” The innuendo is clear in her tone and you have to focus really hard not to say yes instantly. You want that so, so bad.
“You aren’t in control today,” you remind her. “This is your present.” You say it for her, but most of all you say it to yourself. This is all about her.
“What better present that to have your sweet cunt over my mouth, riding my face?” Her words send a shiver down your spine, a tiny whine escaping before you can contain it. She chuckles and you curse under your breath, making her laugh harder.
So you play dirty, once again. You open her legs and dip your head. “You are a very cocky alien to be so wet already,” you say as you lean down and lick over her juices. She screams your name as she arches her back, making you feel powerful.
You have no mercy when you start using all your tricks to make her lose her mind, your hands cupping her small boobs as you pinch her nipples and use your tongue to play with her opening. Aliens like her don’t have a clit, but her pussy is so sensitive she can come over and over just with your tongue (fact that you take advantage of as much as possible).
You get her to come twice before you feel the switch in her body, the way she tenses and your belly fills with anticipation. “Come here,” she says. Her tone already tells you lost, there’s no way she would use that tone if she wasn’t going to take control.
And she does.
She pulls the blindfold off and manhandles you until your pussy is over her face and your face is over her pussy. You’ve never tried 69 before, but as soon as her tongue finds your clit, you are seeing stars and screaming her name until our throat feels raw. Then you remember you are supposed to be returning the favor.
Fuck, it’s so hard to focus when her extra long tongue is hitting your G-spot and her fangs are gracing your clit in a way that feels dangerous but so fucking hot you are about to explode.
“You are too good, fuck, I don’t know if I’ll last,” you warn her as you start moving your hips against her face. She grunts in agreement, her tongue moving faster and her fingers finding your asshole at the same time her other hand flicks one of your nipples.
It takes you less than three seconds to be coming messily around her tongue. But she doesn’t stop there. Of course she doesn’t, she is obsessed with your taste and once she gets her tongue against you, she wouldn’t stop until you’ve come at least five times (which you enjoy greatly), but right now, with her pussy in front of your face, you can’t focus enough.
Fuck.
You can’t let her win this, you promised yourself, this would be about her. It’s her gift. You lean down with renovated vigor as you try to bring her to climax as fast as possible, using all the tricks in your sleeve as she does the same.
Good Goddess. Why does he have to be so fucking good with her tongue?
You keep going, using your fingers to touch the soft area right below her opening, the part of her that makes her scream and thrash around the bed every time you use your special dildo with her. She gasps around your clit, two of her fingers inside of your cunt, rubbing your G-spot until your eyes black out and you come messily once again.
She continues her orgasms quest as you renovate your efforts, which are rewarded when two seconds later she screams against your pussy and you feel the gush of fluid coming out of her. You lap at it like it’s the best meal possible, and she thrashes under you, almost throwing you off her body, but you hold tight as you start finger her.
Her voice is hoarse, but she keeps fucking you with two fingers, his thumb against your asshole, and when she enters your back door, you scream and something inside of you breaks. You feel the gush of squirt all over her as she gasps and stops moving, as surprised as you.
You both are breathing fast and hard by the time you stop coming. She turns your limp body around and stares at your face. She looks so fucked out, all wet and glassy eyed, you have to moan.
“I didn’t know you could do that, my love,” she says. There’s amazement in her voice, and you feel almost embarrassed. The pillows are soaked, her face and hair, too. Fuck. You didn’t even know you were a squirter.
“I didn’t know I could,” you answer truthfully, resting your head against her chest, listening to the melodic rhythm of her three hearts.
“I guess it’s a big man miracle,” she blurts out, making you laugh until your stomach hurts.
“A Christmas miracle, not a big man miracle,” you correct, your laughter making it hard for you to form words. When you calm down enough, you look up at her with soft eyes and ask: “Did you like your present?” There’s an edge of vulnerability in your voice.
She doesn’t disappoint, answering you with every ounce of sexiness she has. “Oh yes… I very much liked it. I’m going to get you doing that as soon as you recover,” she tells you, kissing your head and making you moan at the possibilities.
Best holidays ever.
#monster advent calendar#wlw#fem monster#fem monster x fem reader#lesbian monster#alien#alien x reader#alien x human#alien x you#fem alien#monster#monster fucker#monster imagine#monster x human#teratophillia#monster x reader#terato#monster girlfriend#monster love#monster kink#monster lover#monster fuqqer#monster romance#monster smut#monster x you#monsterfucker#monsterfucking nsft
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new beginnings
Pairing: theodore nott x reader
Summary: after theo very unexpectantly breaks up with you, you try your best to pick yourself back up and move on. theo, on the other hand, seems to be having a harder time of that.
Word Count: 2.2k+
Masterlist
part two :)
✰ ✰ ✰
“(Y/N), you’ve got to get out of bed at some point.” Hermione said. She was sitting on the side of your bed while you laid fully wrapped under the covers. Hermione gently tugged the blanket down from your chin, but you whined a little in protest.
“‘Mione, I seriously can’t do this yet.”
Theo, your boyfriend of over a year had broken up with you only a few short days ago. You’d been in bed ever since, heartbroken over what could have been.
“(Y/N), I know you’re upset, but you have to get up. I can’t let you live the rest of your life in bed! Don’t you know how badly your bum would hurt from laying all of your life?” Hermione joked.
A small smile grew on your lips. “Yeah, that would be pretty tragic. I have too nice of a butt to let that happen.”
Hermione laughed. “There she is! I’ve missed your little jokes. Ron and Harry have become quite boring without you around. I think they’re worried about you.”
You groaned. “Nooo. I hate when people worry about me. It’s just so awkward when I have to be like ‘I’m fine’, ‘no really, I’m fine’.”
Hermione shrugged. “Well, are you?”
You sighed, pulling the covers down from your chin. You looked up at her, a forlorn look on your face. “Definitely not, but I suppose you’re right. I don’t want to be stuck in here for the rest of my life. I just, I just don’t think I can handle seeing him right now.”
Hermione looked at you sadly. “I know. I hate seeing you so upset like this. God, what I would do to put a hex on that boy. He’s quite deserving of it, I would say. Maybe a rat’s tail, or a snake tongue.”
You giggled and sat up in bed. “Or how about we make him bald, or worse, blonde.”
Hermione laughed at that. “Oh, Godric, then we’d have another Draco running around. I don’t think I could handle that.”
“Me either,” you laughed. Slowly, your smile dropped. “I just hate him. Well, no, I don’t hate him. And I hate that! I hate that even after breaking my heart I still love him and long for him.”
Hermione sighed, “I’m sorry, (Y/N/N), I wish I could say something or do something to make this better, I just really don’t know what.”
You shrugged, “yeah, it is what it is. It’s not your fault he’s an ass.”
She chuckled. “So, what do you say? You wanna try to get down to the great hall before dinner starts? I’m sure the guys would like to see you again.”
You thought it over for a minute. You really had missed your friends. Other than Hermione, you’d ostracized yourself from everyone just to avoid Theo.
But were you really ready to see him again? You didn’t think you would ever be ready to see him again.
“You know what,” you stated, “I am gonna go to dinner tonight. And I’m gonna ignore him and see my friends who I’ve missed and ignore the hell out of him because he’s an ass and why should I be the one who has to stay in bed all day?”
“Woohoo!” Hermione cheered. “You’re amazing, let’s get you showered and dressed. I hate to say it, but if you’re gonna get back into the world, you need to wash your hair.”
You chuckled as you picked up a piece of hair to inspect it. “Yeah, okay. Shower first, look really pretty, eat dinner, come back. Piece of cake.”
You pushed the covers off of you as Hermione stood from the bed.
She said, “I’m gonna grab your clothes, so just get in the shower. We shouldn’t be too late to dinner that way.”
You nodded and headed to the bathroom. You were gonna go in there, socialize with your friends, reassure them you were fine, and everything would go back to normal. You hoped.
✰ ✰ ✰
“(Y/N)!” Ginny shouted as you and Hermione made it to the Gryffindor table. She stood up from her seat and pulled you right into a hug.
Releasing the breath you didn’t know you were holding, you smiled and held her even tighter in the hug. Ginny was an amazing friend to you. She had tried her best to see you, but you didn’t let anyone in. Only Hermione since she shared the room with you.
Pulling away, Ginny dragged you to sit down next to her. Hermione followed suit and sat on the other side of you. “Oh, we’ve missed you so much, (Y/N/N). We’ve all been so worried about you, haven’t we?”
Harry and Ron sat across from you. They both nodded their heads, agreeing with Ginny.
“Yeah, what an ass,” Ron scoffed. “Honestly, someone needs to knock that bloke down from his high horse. He doesn’t know what he’s missing, (Y/N/N).”
“Yeah,” Harry replied as he pushed some mashed potatoes in his mouth. “Theodore is a walking red flag. I for one am not sorry for him. He lost a good girl and he’s gonna regret what he’s done.”
You smiled at them. “Yeah, I am pretty awesome. Thanks guys.”
They chuckled and continued eating. Merlin knows those two could eat an entire quidditch field full of food.
“Ahem,” a throat cleared from behind you.
Turning around, you saw Enzo standing there sheepishly.
“Uh,” he stuttered, “hey, (Y/N).”
“Oh,” you said. “Uh, hi Enzo. Do you need something?” You couldn’t hide the crack in your voice. Damn it.
Enzo was probably your favorite of Theo's friends. He was always the one you had most in common with, and therefore connected with pretty easily. You’d never hung out one on one, so you couldn’t really say he was your friend.
“I-no I don’t need something, per say. I just wanted to talk to you. Alone, if, uh, that’s alright.”
You looked back at your friends, unsure if you should talk with him or not. They all seemed to be the same amount of weary as you were, but you were intrigued.
“I don’t really want to talk to Theo, if that’s what this is.”
Enzo shook his head. “No! Ahem, no. I wanted to talk to you. To, uh, apologize kind of? I don’t know. It’s fine if you don’t wanna talk to me, this was silly, I’m sorry-“
“It’s fine, Enzo,” you cut off his rambling. “I’ll speak with you.” You looked back at your friends as you stood up from the table. “I’ll be right back.”
They nodded their heads as you let Enzo lead you away from the table and out the door.
Once you two stood out in the hallway, Enzo kind of just shuffled his feet around, almost as if he was shying away from talking to you.
“Am I supposed to say something first?” You questioned, crossing your arms over your chest.
“No, sorry,” he said as he rubbed the back of his neck. “I just feel a little awkward. I know what happened between you and Theo, but I guess I just hoped that didn’t mean we couldn’t be friends anymore.”
Your eyes softened a little at his confession. Enzo’s cheeks blushed a little as you stared at him.
You sighed. You and Enzo really had been good friends, and you weren’t exactly keen on losing his friendship.
“I mean,” he continued, “you’re the only one who doesn’t make fun of my poetry, you’re the one I go to when I want to talk about books or get recommendations from, and I just would hate to lose our friendship just because I’m friends with Theo as well.”
Your heart melted. “Enzo, of course I still want to be friends with you. I will admit, I was a little nervous you wouldn’t want to talk to me anymore after Theo broke up with me. I really enjoy being your friend.”
Enzo smiled in relief. “Oh good. I thought this would be more awkward and a little bit more sad than how it’s actually going.”
You giggled. “Thank god. I don’t know what I would have done if I just had a real breakup as well as a friendship breakup.”
Enzo smiled awkwardly. “Yeah, I am really sorry about that. I don’t know why he would ever break up with you in the first place. You’re so kind, and I thought you brought the best out in him.”
You forced an awkward smile. You really did not want to be talking about Theo right now, especially not about how you made him a better person.
Before you could reply, a voice yelled out from behind you.
“Oi!”
Turning around, you could see Theo storming up towards you and Enzo.
“What the fuck, mate?” Theo huffed as he got in between you and Enzo.
“Woah!” You shouted, backing up as Theo got up into Enzo’s face. “Theo, what are you doing?”
He ignored you and kept talking to Enzo. “Are you hitting on my girlfriend? Right after all the shit we just went through?”
“What?” Enzo squeaked. “I’m not hitting on her, I was just talking to her.”
You were pissed. Your fists balled up at your sides as you stomped up to Theo. You grabbed onto his shoulder and yanked him away from Enzo. Theo didn’t see it coming, so he stumbled and fell back a couple of steps.
“Get the hell away from him,” you growled. “And what the fuck is wrong with you, Theodore?”
You got between Theo and Enzo, pushing your finger into your ex-boyfriend’s chest accusingly.
“First,” you said, “you break up with me, break my heart, and then you have the fucking nerve to come up here all righteous and accuse Enzo of whatever the fuck you said, all while calling me your girlfriend when you’re the asshole who broke up with me!”
You glared at Theo, watching as his anger turned soft. “I am not your girlfriend anymore, Theodore Nott. You’re the one who made that happen, so you have no fucking right to come up in my conversations acting like I owe you anything.”
“(Y/N),” he softly said. “I… I’m sorry. You’re right, I shouldn’t have come out here all crazy. I just, I hate seeing you with anyone else, even if it’s one of my friends.”
He turned to talk to Enzo, “I’m sorry, mate. Will you give us a few minutes?”
Enzo nodded his head and gave you an awkward smile before heading back into the dining hall.
You huffed, settling down a little as you stared at Theo.
He looked tired. His eyes had circles underneath them, and his cheeks didn’t have their usual flush to them. He was as gorgeous as ever, but he looked drained.
“You don’t look so good,” you pointed out, trying to sound nonchalant.
Theo frowned and softly said, “neither do you.”
Your lips pulled tight in a frown. Theo didn’t need to know how much he had affected you with the breakup.
You sighed, “what are you doing, Theo?”
He shrugged and put his hands in his pockets awkwardly. “I, uh, I’m not really sure. I just didn’t like seeing you with Enzo.”
“Why? You broke up with me.”
Theo huffed, “I don’t know. I just don’t like seeing you with anyone else. It still feels like I’m supposed to be there. Like I’m supposed to be the one with you. I miss you.”
You shook your head as hurt started to creep back into your heart. “Don’t say things like that to me, Theo. Not after what you did. I loved you, and you broke up with me out of nowhere for no good reason, either.”
“I’m sorry,” he tried to reach for you, but you shrugged off his hand. “I don’t know why I did what I did. I just know that I regret it like crazy. I want to be with you, (Y/N). I’ve always wanted to be with you, I was stupid to let you go. Can you forgive me?”
Your lips pulled tight. “Theo, I can’t just get back with you like this.” You said. “I don’t trust you anymore. You broke my heart, and broke my trust. You gave me no reason for the breakup, so who’s to say it won’t happen right after we get back together?”
He shook his head. “Dolcezza, no. I won’t do that to you, not again. What can I do to prove this to you?”
You shrugged. “I don’t know. I can’t get back with you. Not like this, and not so soon. You really hurt me, Theo.”
“Well, what if we try being friends at least?” He suggested.
“You wanna be my friend?”
“No,” he said immediately. “But I’ll settle for being your friend for as long as it takes to win you back.”
Your heart warmed at what he had said. Maybe you could try being friends with him. He did really hurt you, but you’d be lying if you said you didn’t miss him.
“Okay,” you decided, “I’ll give you a chance to be my friend. Don’t hurt me again, Theodore, or I’ll get Ginny on you.”
He chuckled. “Don’t worry, darling, I’m gonna do whatever it takes to get my baby back. I can promise you that.”
#AW SNAP#THERES ONE FROM THAT PROMPT LIST#theodore nott x reader#theodore nott#theo nott#theo nott x reader#harry potter#draco malfoy x reader#draco malfoy#mattheo riddle x reader#mattheo riddle#enzo berkshire#lorenzo berkshire#ron weasly x reader#george weasley#fred weasly x reader#cedric diggory x reader
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The end we start from
Pairing : Astarion x female!reader/Tav Around 1,8 words Takes place after the events in Cazador's palace in act 3 (non-ascended Astarion, established relationship) Angst with a happy ending (and loooots of sex) <3
Astarion doesn’t feel good enough. you show him he’s everything.
TW : 18+ MDNI, unprotected sex, very angry/angsty/rough sex, fingering, mature language, mentions of death and depression, mentions of blood
A/N : when i don’t work, i do two things: i take care of my dog and i play BG3. i don’t eat. i don’t sleep. i don’t socialize. i just play BG3. and I write stuff about *him*.
Astarion is many things. Quiet is not one of them. But lately, that’s all he’s been, and you’ve been worrying about him night and day. Tonight is no exception. You wake up in the middle of the night and realize two things : not only is Astarion’s side of the bed empty but the sheets and pillows are untouched, uncrumpled. His side hasn’t been slept in. This isn’t right. Of course, he doesn’t really need to sleep but he always, always lays next to you at night, spooning you, playing with your hair and whispering sweet I love yous in your ear until you fall asleep. His absence means something’s off. Unable to shake off the anxiety, you get up in one swift motion, determined to find him. No chance you’re falling back asleep now anyway.
Your bare feet hit the cold marble floor and you shiver as you make your way accros the bedroom in a hurry. You think of searching outside in case he went for a hunt, but it turns out you don’t have to look too far. There he is, silently leaning against the wall by the window, gazing into the pitch-black night of the Underdark. The light in the room is so dim that you couldn’t even spot him from your bed. You approach him and your heart breaks a little when you notice the lingering sadness in his crimson eyes, enhanced by the faint light of the burning candles next to him.
You want to ask him if he’s ok but it’s obvious he’s not so instead, you remain silent and close the space between the two of you, wrapping your arms around him and gently resting your head on his shoulder.
“What are you thinking about?” You ask softly after a while, your voice barely above a whisper.
Astarion averts his gaze and gives you a faint smile, nothing but a twist of lips.
“Nothing,” he replies. “I’m just being selfish, as usual. Forgive me, y/n.”
You frown and stare at him incredulously. “You’re not selfish,” you say, surprised at how intensely he means it. “Why would you even say that?”
“I –” He pauses, rethinks his words. This does nothing to make you less worried. “I caused you great pain,” he finally says. “I put you in danger. Repeatedly, ever since we met. You could have died a hundred times and it would have been my own, entire fault.”
You look up to him and feel a lump form in your throat. You have never seen him look like this – grief in his eyes and etched into the lines of his face.
“I’m not dead, Astarion. I’m right here with you.” You say as you wrap your arms around his neck. He makes a sound somewhere near a sob and your arms tighten.
“But I did put you in danger and now you’re stuck with me for eternity, in the middle of nowhere, and you—" Again, he stops. He’s bad at this, at talking about emotions. But he fights through it because it’s you. And nothing can be left unsaid between the two of you. Not after everything that’s happened. “You deserve so much better. You deserve the world, and I can’t give it to you.” You’re not sure where this conversation is going but you don't want to find out. His lower lip quiver but he goes on, words spilling out of him like blood from a wound. “I can’t give it to you, and I’ll never be able to forgive myself for it. It’s killing me all over again.” You crumble under each one of his words. His lips are trembling now and you can’t stand it. You can’t but you can’t do him the dishonor of looking away either.
“Astarion, I chose this life.” Your hands flutter to his face, each one cupping a cold cheek, forcing him to look at you. Your heart is pounding, and you know he can feel it. “I had a choice; I could stay, or I could run, and I chose you. I’m not stuck here. I’m home.”
Astarion heaves a faltering breath in an attempt at composure. “Sometimes I think you would be happier without me. Better off.” He barely mouths the words, but you hear them all distinctively, nonetheless. “You should go and leave me here. Walk in the sun. Be happy and live your life.” You draw your hands away from his face and he steps back, speaking louder now.
“It won’t get any better in here,” he continues, gesturing urgently around the room. “It’ll always be cold and dark, I’ll always be a blood-thirsty monster. I belong to the shadows, and I’ll never be able to make you happy, so you might as well just leave.”
His words knock the air out of your lungs and, for a moment, you cannot breathe. You feel your pulse pounding in your veins and blood thrumming under your skin as your heartbreak turns into anger. That fucking idiot, you think, looking up at him through eyes blurred with tears.
“You don’t know what makes me happy. You don’t,” you shout, surprised by the vehemence in your voice. "And you certainly don't get to speak for me." Astarion looks at you in such confusion that you almost feel bad for a moment, but you continue.
“You – you make me happy, Astarion, gods you do. I would rather live an eternity in the Underdark with you than one more day in the fucking sun.” Your heart is clenching in your chest, and you can feel the heat pooling in your cheeks. “By no means would I be better off, let alone happier, without you. I can’t believe that you could even think –” You trail off and sigh in frustration. You can’t bring yourself to scream at him any longer because that’s all he’s ever known before you, screams and shouts and abuse, and you can’t do this to him. But that doesn’t leave you with many options to get through to him. Astarion opens his mouth to say something, but you don’t let him.
Without warning you grab his shirt to pull him close and your lips crash into his, knocking the breath out of both of you with the force that you collide with. It only fuels your rage because the moment his lips are on yours, you can’t help thinking that you almost lost this once and you can’t actually lose it. You won’t let that happen. So you kiss him harder. It’s rough and desperate and sloppy. It's harsh breath and biting teeth.
He turns you around and backs you against the wall. You take it rather hard, but you welcome the sting. Anything to shut him up about not being good enough for you. He crowds in closer, presses you even harder against the wall, shoving his knee between your thighs. His cold lips connect to your throat, making you eagerly tilt your head to give him access to your thrumming pulse dancing at your neck. You have absolutely no qualms about it. If he wants it, it’s his.
But he doesn’t take it. Instead, his mouth sucks and licks, making you squirm and rock your hips against him. You cling to him, grabbing his shoulders and sliding your hands down his shirt and to his back. He hoists you up like you weighed nothing and you wrap both legs around his waist. You tangle your hands in his curly silver hair and pull him forward to feel that mouth on yours again. His tongue running over your lip makes you grind faster, searching for more, more, more. You moan when his hand reaches beneath your gown and through your damp underwear.
Firm, icy fingers are stroking you into madness. You make a sound that’s close to a whimper, but more like a groan, because damn it, you are so impatient now. You are clenching – aching to have him inside.
He is gasping at the feeling of your fluttering around him, and you must be gasping too, but you’re not sure; your head falls back and it feels like you’re breathing, but you could just as well be drowning.
You dig your nails hard into his back - you need to channel the anger into something. Maybe you’ll be the one drawing blood this time. You lean forward to rest your dizzy head on his shoulder and groan in anticipation. Not wasting anymore time, he pushes his hard, large cock into you, going steadily until he’s all the way in.
“Harder. Fuck me harder.” You plead and he obeys.
He sets a pace that graces all the right spots, spurred on the increasingly desperate noises escaping your mouth. This is no effort at all for him, holding you up easily and fucking you hard with determination. But you can see it when you rest your forehead against his – the sheer weakness you feel is reflected right back at you and you know he needs this just as much as you do.
You are so close. You need to concentrate on breathing, just so you simply don’t die. Your lower back thuds against the wardrobe with your oh gods and fucks singing in tandem. The vampire trails open-mouthed kisses and little bites down your neck while maintaining the almost vicious pace in and out of you. Every stroke curls and loves and breaks you into submission. You forget to be angry because your release is in his hands and your body is desperately handing itself over to him.
Your thighs start to quiver around him, the sounds of wetness and the feeling of his own explosion of pleasure deep inside you taking you so high that eventually, you shatter into him. You’re so grateful for the strength holding you up, so you can fall apart.
Your repeatedly moan his name on your way back to consciousness, lips brushing softly against his pale skin.
Before you know what is happening, you break into a sob.
“Please…. Please don’t ever tell me to leave, ever again.” You try to articulate, your voice shaking uncontrollably.
He sinks down onto his knees, holding you in his lap and whispering, “Shh,” into your ear.
“I’m so sorry,” he says, his voice is low and full of gravel. He never sounded so sweet. “I love you, always have and always will. And you’re not going anywhere.”
#baldur's gate 3#bg3#astarion baldurs gate#astarion bg3#astarion x tav#astarion x reader#astarion x oc#astarion fanfic#astarion imagine#astarion x female reader#astarion fluff#astarion smut#bg3 fanfiction#baldur's gate 3 fanfiction#bg3 smut#baldur's gate iii#astarion x you#larian studios#neil newbon#baldur's gate#bg3 fluff#astarion ancunin#astarion angst#bg3 tav#bg3 spoilers#astarion x y/n#astarion fic
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have your cake | quinn hughes
warnings: overstimulation, multiple orgasms, oral (fem!receiving), fingering, unprotected p in v, coming on reader's body, subspace (not directly called that but gf is DEEP in SOME headspace) pairing: birthday boy!quinn hughes x fem!reader summary: it's quinn's 25th birthday, so fem!reader gives him the chance to do his favorite thing in bed for as long as he would like. wc: 2992
“Thank you for dinner, sweetheart,” Quinn says, bringing his napkin to his face and wiping his mouth. “And thanks for not making my birthday such a big deal.”
He had asked for such, so you were just trying to follow his wishes. The Canucks hadn’t had a game today, so Quinn had gone to practice like normal. He had grabbed a drink with Petey, Garly, and J.T. afterward as a special treat for his birthday. You know that Tocchet had asked catering to make Quinn a singular birthday cupcake, since he isn’t the biggest fan of sweets during the season.
With you, though, he just wanted to spend his time. You made him a steak, his favorite. On the side, you baked a potato and heaped a healthy pile of green beans onto his plate. For fun, you made some cheesy garlic bread, and although he doesn’t normally eat gluten during the season, he’s never been able to deny your fluttering eyelashes and doe eyes.
He cleared his plate. He always does, but you feel especially proud of your cooking today.
“You’re welcome,” you respond. “I’m glad you liked it. Has your birthday been good?”
Quinn nods. “It was a good day. Very calm. It’s still weird without Jack and Luke, but I talked to them earlier. They called me before practice, right after they got out of the gym.” He pauses, reaching out with his palm up so you take his hand. “This dinner is the cherry on top.”
“You haven’t even had dessert yet,” you tell him. “Since it’s your birthday, you get to have your cake and eat it, too.” You’d been thinking about the pun for hours. It might not make the most sense, given the dessert that you’re going to offer him in just a few minutes, but you think you’re funny. You’re on the last few bites of your own dinner, so you want to clear your plate and load the dishwasher before you offer him anything.
“Baby, I don’t need anything sweet,” Quinn says. “I already had something today.”
You take the final bite of potatoes, then swallow. You stand, collecting his plate and stacking it atop your own. “You’ll like it, I promise.”
“What is it?” Quinn asks.
“A surprise,” you tease, winking at him as you rinse the debris off of the plates with hot water. Then, you load the dishwasher and wash your hands, drying them with the towel that hangs near the sink.
“You’re such a tease,” Quinn laughs, pretending to chide you for withholding. He stands from the table and washes his own hands, but as soon as he’s done, he takes the opportunity to get handsy with you. He dries his hands on your clothes, leaving wet handprints over your ass and waist, plus one over one of your tits for good measure.
You twist away from him like you hate the antics, but it’s just the precursor to his dessert, which he doesn’t know yet. Sure, he’s probably hoping to get laid tonight– and it is his birthday, after all– but you had other plans.
Quinn rarely gets to do his favorite thing in bed. Part of that is because you’re both busy and when you fuck, you want to fuck. You like getting to the point where Quinn’s ample cock is buried inside you, filling you with his come, all while he murmurs little nothings about “you’re mine,” “gonna put a baby in you,” or the like.
His favorite thing is to lay between your legs and eat you out until your thighs are squeezing his head and covering his ears and suffocating him. Like you said– you’re normally greedy for his cock, even impatient (which is how he often describes your attitude in bed), but today is Quinn’s birthday.
So, if he wants to, and he will want to, he’ll eat your pussy for dessert. He’ll eat you out until he’s had his fill, no matter how many orgasms it takes. You already set two full bottles of water on the bedside table in your shared room, plus you bought some fruit at the store so that you can recharge when he’s done with you. You’re expecting overstimulation, a fuzzy brain, and maybe even tears as a result of the pleasure.
You’re prepared for anything, because you’re at the mercy of the birthday boy today.
“Go to our room,” you tell Quinn. “I’m going to bring you dessert in bed, okay? I’ll be there in a few minutes. Just let me get everything ready.”
“Good idea,” Quinn says. “Then we won’t have to leave bed afterward.”
You playfully roll your eyes at him and shoo him away, but he’s absolutely correct. That’s the whole point.
Quinn goes, blowing you a kiss just before he walks out of sight because he can’t help himself from being silly when you share a domestic evening together.
Once he’s gone, you pretend to prepare a dish. You open and close the fridge a couple of times, you click the lighter like you’re lighting candles, you remove plates and cups from the cupboard so that he hears the clatter and suspects nothing. As you move around the kitchen, shuffling along inconspicuously, you remove your clothes.
Underneath your normal leggings, t-shirt, and one of Quinn’s Canucks sweatshirts lies your favorite part of the outfit. You’d been planning to do this since the end of September, so you’d had plenty of time to go to Victoria’s Secret and buy yourself a black, lace crotchless teddy. Quinn will get to look up at you in the (not-so cheap) fabric and admire how it fits you without sacrificing his ability to eat you out. There’s no barrier between your cunt and his tongue, despite the fact that you’ll still be clothed.
You have planned everything out to the final detail, to the final possibility, and you might be just as eager as Quinn will be when he sees you.
So that you’ll have something to snack on when he’s done, you actually wash the fruit you bought earlier and put it in a bowl. Holding the bowl in one hand, you politely knock on the bedroom door before entering.
Quinn is already in the process of removing his shirt and getting ready for bed. When you walk in, he turns to meet you. When he sees what you’re wearing, he freezes and his lips part in surprise.
In a second, you watch his expression melt into his typical “my brain has turned off and now the only thing that I can think about is getting my girlfriend in bed” look.
“Happy birthday, baby,” you say, biting your lip as you take in his reaction. You put a hand on your hip and pop it to the side, showing off your outfit.
“Are you my present?” He asks, a slow smile spreading across his face.
“I’m your dessert,” you correct.
“Even better,” Quinn decides, crossing the room and getting his hands on you.
“Wait,” You tell him.
Quinn pouts, but drops his hands to his sides.
You give him a little twirl, revealing the way that your behind is only partially covered by the lace of the lingerie. You move slowly, giving him plenty of time to stare at all of the parts of your body, thoroughly taking you in.
He gives you a low whistle as you turn. You touch his jaw when you’re done, then you turn to the bed. You actually crawl from the foot of the bed, giving him a show.
When you collapse against the pillows, making yourself comfortable. Quinn stares at you, walking to the bed and touching your ankle. He draws a star on your skin, surveying the view.
“What can I– what do you want me to do?” Quinn asks, eyes still raking your figure.
“Whatever you want,” you reply. “It’s your birthday.”
“Whatever I want?” Quinn repeats.
You hum in affirmation. “Your fingers, your cock,” you list. You raise your eyebrows, bringing one of your legs up into a bent position. His eyes are drawn to your core. “Your mouth.”
Quinn’s attention snaps to your face.
“Whatever you want,” you confirm again. “For however long you want. All night, even. Birthday boy.”
“I love you,” Quinn says, climbing up onto the bed and settling between your legs. “You’re perfect.”
“I expect the same kind of treatment on my birthday,” you banter back, moving with his touch. He nudges your knee, so you spread your legs for him.
Quinn doesn’t reply, running his fingers over the fabric that lies on either side of your pussy. He pushes his thumb against your clit, applying pressure but not giving pleasure, not yet.
You take it as a sign that you’re in for a long night. So, you shift and make yourself more comfortable. You look down, watching Quinn.
He’s gentle to start. He presses sweet kiss after sweet kiss to your folds, to your clit which is still hidden. He takes his time.
You’re not sure which is true: if you’re wet of your own accord, or if Quinn’s gentle licks and smeared kisses make you that way.
In the end, it doesn’t matter. You’re wet and Quinn’s getting to do what he loves. You’re comfortable, he’s making satisfied noises as he grows more eager, and everything feels good.
You touch his hair, smoothing it off of his forehead. You tilt your head, admiring him with slow blinks and a serene smile on your face.
Quinn has a one-track mind at the moment. Until he’s drawn an orgasm out of you, he won’t look up and check in.
His tongue teases you, traipsing along your slit and circling your clit leisurely. He’ll run his bottom lip over the skin, letting it drag along your core and create unexpectedly satisfying friction. He’ll nose at your clit, bumping his features along your most sensitive points, just because he can. Quinn’s eyes are closed, fully immersing himself in the moment.
He works his tongue into you over time, at first teasing you with flicks and short dips, but it doesn’t take long for him to grow greedy for more– greedy for your release all over the muscle. It’s then that he licks into you as best he can, using his thumb to stimulate your bundle of nerves. He repeats the same motion over and over– prodding his tongue into you, drawing it out… again and again, all the while he’s pressing against your clit.
Your first orgasm builds slowly. Slow and steady wins the race, they always say, and Quinn is drawing the orgasm out of you like the tortoise in this race. You’re starting to feel a bit jumpy, like the rabbit, your hips aching to move beneath him and grind against his face.
But, this is his birthday present. You restrain yourself because it’s his gift. He gets to set the pace. If Quinn wants to make this the most built-up, desperate orgasm of your life, he’s allowed to do so.
It takes minutes. Minutes of Quinn humming and licking and touching you with the pad of his thumb until you feel yourself start to crest over the wave of your climax.
“Close,” you breathe out.
Quinn pays you no mind, just continuing his ministrations until you’re clenching down on his tongue with a whimper. Your hand clutches his hair, trying not to seize up beneath him as you come, riding out the waves with his tongue still poking around inside of you.
He moves more slowly as you come down from your first, withdrawing his tongue from your cunt and licking over the slick that accumulated after your orgasm.
“Again,” Quinn murmurs. He doesn’t allow you to take a breath before he finds your clit with his tongue and latches on.
He seems committed to making your subsequent releases quick. His mouth feels like the tube of a vacuum against your clit, unrelenting and merciless. He’s sucking, and sucking, and sucking.
Quinn is starting to get sloppy. He’s got slick all over his lips, all over his chin. He stares up at you now, nothing behind his hooded eyes. He’s just taking you in, looking at you from his favorite angle.
His hands are resting on the insides of your thighs, laying securely to keep your legs spread for him. His pupils are dilated, massive and dark. His jaw works– you can see the bones in his face shifting as he tastes you. His face is scruffy as he nuzzles against you.
It isn’t long until you come again, just as strong as the first one. This climax seems to hit you harder, just because it came more quickly.
“Another,” he says into your skin, shifting one of his hands to push a finger into your heat. He doesn’t move his mouth from your clit, only intensifying his suction.
“Fuck,” you reply, halfway between a moan and a cry for… something. A break? For more?
You’re not sure. Things are starting to blur together and turn fuzzy. You’ve come twice without a moment of reprise, because that’s what Quinn wants. You’ll give him as many as he desires, until you physically cannot give any more.
You close your eyes and lose track of time, seeing stars the next time Quinn makes you come. He’s worked up to a second finger now, scissoring them and removing his tongue from your clit to shove it between his fingers. All three are inside of you, bringing you over the crest again.
Then, a third finger and his tongue on your nipple.
Then, again, with his tongue on your other nipple.
Another with his mouth pressing insistent kiss after insistent kiss to your cheeks, lips, and neck.
Your vision is black, then reeling with colors like that scene in Ratatouille when Remy mixes all of those different flavors, then like television static on an old TV.
“One more,” Quinn’s voice comes out of the darkness.
You whine, high in the back of your throat.
“I know, sweetheart,” Quinn murmurs. He’s touching your face, wiping underneath your eyes. “I know. You’re doing so well. You’re being so good for me. I love you so much– give me one more on my cock, okay? Then we’ll be done.”
“Quinn,” you keen, opening your eyes and finding it hard to look at him through the wetness there. You hadn’t realized that the overstimulation had gotten to you so much– but that’s what multiple orgasms will do to you. That’s how you react when your body is experiencing so much pleasure that it’s painful.
“That’s right, baby, I’m right here,” Quinn assures you. You can feel his cock nudging against your entrance, which feels like it’s gaping. You’re certain that your clit is swollen from the stimulation, the excessive stimulation. He sinks into you, inch by inch, cooing quietly to keep you grounded. “You’re so close already, I can feel it in the way you’re squeezing me. It’ll be quick, baby, I promise.”
He continues to talk while he fucks you, telling you how good you’ve been. He tells you how sexy you are, how perfect. He tells you how hard he’s been since you walked into the bedroom in your dirty, pretty lingerie and how he honestly thought he was going to come in his pants when you clenched down on his fingers for the third time and a weak dribble of your cum had dripped down his wrist.
You’re far gone. Sure, you’re there– you can feel him inside, pumping into you and throbbing against your walls. You can feel the way Quinn’s lips move over your own when he kisses you and when he speaks, feeding the words directly into your mouth. His fingers are toying with your puffy clit, and you’re sure it feels nice, but all you can feel is heat and friction.
“Quinn,” you say again.
“Let go,” he instructs under his breath. “Let go for me. Come around my cock, baby.”
You nod, agreeing to a seemingly-impossible task.
Quinn is always able to make the impossible happen. Your final climax manifests in shaking legs and bolts of lightning in your stomach, churning and folding in on itself. Your eyes are squeezed shut, tears leaking from the corners, which Quinn kisses away.
He doesn’t come inside you. After you reach your final peak, he pulls out. He jerks himself above you, continuing to kiss your face and praise you for being so good to him. He comes all over your stomach and you’re glad– if he had come inside you, or somewhere equally as sensitive like your tits, it would be far too much when the time came to clean you up. With his cum on your stomach, he’s able to wipe you down without causing you any discomfort.
When it’s all over, he helps you sit up and drink your water. He kisses your temples and your forehead, your cheeks and your jawline. He surrounds you with one of his big t-shirts, like a massive hug, and he pulls you onto his lap so that you can collapse into the crook of his neck. Quinn rubs your back and convinces you to eat some of the berries you brought into the room earlier.
You’re tired when you’re able to verbalize a full sentence again. You’re exhausted, really. Quinn pushed you to your absolute limit, although you’re not dissatisfied with the way things went. You sought a night where he could do whatever he wanted, which he did, and now you want to sleep.
“Happy birthday,” you muster.
Quinn breathes out a chuckle, cradling your jawline as you stain his neck with a splotchy kiss. “Thank you again for being so perfect,” he says. “You made my birthday so special, baby. Let’s sleep, okay? I’ll cuddle you all night long.”
Within minutes, you’re drifting off to the lullaby of his breath.
#puck-luck's fics#andy writes anything🍄#quinn hughes#quinn hughes smut#quinn hughes fanfiction#quinn hughes x reader#qh43#nhl smut#nhl fanfiction#nhl fic#hockey smut#happy birthday quinn <3
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Red - Matt Sturniolo
Re uploaded because my account bsturnzmtt got deactivated :( Please follow and let me know if you want to be in my tag list !
Paring: jealous bf! Matt x gf! Reader
Contains/warnings: explicit smut, rough sex, possessive behavior, oral (f receiving), overstimulation, jealousy, dirty talk, praise kink, light biting, unprotected sex, creampie, brief use of a safe word, almost caught.
Summary: Your boyfriend gets jealous about a small interaction you had with a guy at a party, so he takes you home and teaches you a lesson.
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Tonight you and your boyfriend Matt are going to a friends party. His brothers Nick and Chris are also going. You are currently getting ready in Matt’s bathroom, while he’s laying in bed ready, waiting for you to finish. He’s wearing a white t-shirt with some design in the middle, baggy jeans, and of course his signature rings.
“Are you ready yet?” Matt asked.
“Almost” you shout through the bathroom door.
“Okayyy, but hurry up.” He replies.
You add some finishing touches to your makeup, finish straightening your hair and add a good amount of your favorite perfume. You are wearing a tight black mini dress, black heels with red bottoms, and your normal jewelry. You take a glance at the mirror checking if everything’s perfect and exit the bathroom.
“I’m ready!” You say.
His eyes widen as you exit the bathroom, his gaze devouring you from head to toe. "You look... stunning." He says, his gaze roaming over your curves in the tight dress, lingering on the way the fabric clings to your thighs. He walks over, standing close to you as he looks at you. "But maybe a little too stunning. Isn’t that dress a little too short?”
You roll your eyes and look down at the dress. “It’s fine Matt.”
He reaches down, moving one strap of the dress up a little, his fingers trailing along the exposed skin of your shoulder as he does so. "It's fine?" He repeats, a hint of annoyance in his voice. "No, it's not fine. I don't want all those guys at the party drooling over you.” He reaches out, wrapping an arm around your waist as he pulls you closer to him. “I don't want any other guy looking at what's mine."
“Come on Maaaatt, it’s not even that revealing, and I really like this dress. I think it looks good on me.” You say.
His jaw clenches at your persistence, his grip on your waist tightening slightly. "You think it looks good on you?" He repeats, his voice low and husky. "You have no idea how good you look in that dress. And that's the problem. So-“ he was about to say something else but Nick interrupted him.
“Are you guys ready? We have to get going.” Nick shouts from the kitchen.
“Let’s just go, okay?” You say with a smile and give Matt a kiss on the cheek. “Yes! We’re ready.” You respond to nick.
Matt scowls at being interrupted, "Fine." He mumbles as he watches you grab your purse and head towards the door. "Hold up," he calls out, catching your wrist in a firm grip. "Not so fast. I want to make one thing clear."
“What?” You ask.
Matt's eyes narrow, his gaze intense as he looks at you. "You're mine. You're my girlfriend.” he says, his voice low and firm, his eyes locked onto yours. “You don't leave my side, you don't talk to any other guys, you don't even look at them for too long." His voice is low and authoritative, his grip on your wrist unyielding. “Got it?"
“Of course Matt” you say reassuring him and give another kiss but this time on his lips.
Matt's expression softens at your kiss, and he wraps his free arm around your waist, pulling you closer to him, deepening the kiss for a moment before slowly breaking it off. He lets out a sigh and smiles down at you. “Let’s go.”
You guys head downstairs where Chris and Nick are waiting. As you head downstairs, Matt stays close behind you, his hand resting on the small of your back. When you reach the bottom of the stairs, you see Chris and Nick standing by the door, chatting and laughing. Then Chris turns and says. “Finallyyyy.”
Matt holds the door open for you as you slide into the passenger seat of the car, then walks over to the driver's side and climbs in. His brothers riding on the back seat. He starts the engine and pulls out of the driveway, soon merging onto the road that leads towards the party.
After 10 minutes, Matt pulls up to a large house in a quiet suburban neighborhood. The front yard is packed with cars, and the sound of loud music can be heard from inside the house. Matt parks the car and turns off the engine. “We’re here”
“Yess!” Chris says excited.
"Come on, let's go," Matt says, opening the car door and stepping out. He offers you his hand to help you out of the vehicle. As you take his hand, he gives it a squeeze, a silent reminder of his possessiveness. "Stick close to me, okay?"
You nod and walk into the party.
As you walk into the party, the loud music and chatter envelop you. Matt stays close, his hand still wrapped around yours. You make your way through the crowded room, nodding and smiling at people you recognize. The smell of beer and sweat hangs in the air, and the bass thumps through the floor.
Matt looks down at you, his eyes shining with intensity. His grip on your hand tightens. "I mean it, Stay close," he growls. As he says it, he pulls you a little closer to him, just a small step.
You chuckle “Yesss Matt.”
Matt's face softens, and he gives you a small, flirtatious smile. "Good," he says, his voice low and husky. He leans in, his lips brushing against your ear. "I don't want anyone else getting too close to you."
You laugh a bit at his jealousy and lean in to give him a short kiss. “Let’s dance.”
Matt's eyes flash with desire at your kiss, and he growls low in his throat. He nods, a slight smirk on his face. "Yeah, let's dance." He pulls you onto the dance floor, the two of you moving to the beat as his strong arms wrap around you.
Matt holds you close, his thigh moving against yours as you dance. The heat between you two rises uncomfortably. And every time he pulls you close, pressing his lips against yours, you can't help but melt against him.
“I’m gonna go get a drink, okay?” You say to Matt.
Matt's eyes narrow, a flicker of possessiveness sparking in them. "Alright," he says, but there's an underlying tension in his voice. "but don't be long." He gives your hand a gentle squeeze before releasing you, watching you go with an eagle's gaze.
As you’re walking towards the bar a guy ‘accidentally’ bumps into you almost making you fall but he grabs you by the waist so you don’t fall. “I’m so sorry,” the guy says. “Uhm it’s fine don’t worry.” You say pulling his hands away.
Matt's eyes are glued to the guy who just touched you. He clenches his fists and starts making his way towards you with a menacing stride. "Is there a problem here?" he says, getting between you and the stranger.
“Matt, he accidentally bumped into me.” You explain.
Matt's gaze is still fixed on the guy, his eyes blazing with barely contained anger. "Accidentally?" he repeats, his voice low and dangerous. He takes another step forward, crowding the stranger. "You sure that's all it was?"
You grab Matt's arm trying to pull him away. “Matt-“
Matt's arm stiffens under your grip, but he doesn't budge. His eyes are still locked on the stranger, who's starting to look uncomfortable. "Let's go," Matt growls, he turns to look at you. "Now." His tone is low and commanding, brooking no argument.
“What? Where?” You ask confused.
Matt takes your hand, practically dragging you away from the bar. "Home," he says gruffly. "Now." His jaw is clenched, the anger and possessiveness simmering just below the surface.
“Why!? We literally just got here!” You exclaim.
Matt stops in his tracks, turning to face you with a fire in his eyes. "I don't like the way that guy was looking at you," he growls. "I don't like the way he touched you." He takes a step closer, invading your personal space.
“It was an accident.” You say.
Matt's expression turns incredulous, his nostrils flaring. "An accident? Are you kidding me? He takes another step forward, his large frame towering over you. “Why are you defending him? You like him? You liked the way he grabbed you by the waist? How he was looking at you?” his voice is low and intense.
“Wha- Matt, no!” You say.
Matt's face darkens, his eyes flashing with a mix of jealousy and anger. "Then why are you still standing here arguing with me?" He grabs your hand, his grip tight. "We're leaving. Now." His tone leaves no room for discussion, commanding you to obey his orders without question.
Matt starts walking towards the exit, practically dragging you behind him. His grip on your hand is tight and unyielding, a silent warning that he's not in the mood for any arguments. The jealousy and anger are still bubbling just beneath the surface, ready to explode at any moment.
As you stumble to keep up with Matt's long strides, he suddenly stops in front of the car, yanking open the door. "Get in," he growls, his voice still tight with anger.
“What about Chris and Nick?” You ask.
Matt's jaw tics as he grits his teeth. "They can fucking find their own way home," he snaps, his eyes blazing. He takes a step closer, his face inches from yours. "Now, get in the car, before I lose my patience completely."
You quietly get in the car.
Matt slams the door shut behind you, the sound echoing through the quiet night air. He takes a deep breath, his chest heaving, before stalking around to the driver's side and getting in.Matt starts the car, the engine purring to life. He grips the steering wheel tightly, his knuckles turning white. For a few moments, he just sits there, staring straight ahead. Finally, he takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly. "I told you that dress is too fucking short, too revealing. But you decided to be a little slut and stay with it, hm?”
“Matt-
Matt cuts you off, his voice low and menacing. "No, you don't get to talk back to me right now. You're lucky I'm not pulling over and bending you over the seat." He takes a hard right turn onto a secluded road, the headlights casting eerie shadows on the trees.
Matt's eyes flicker to you, his gaze burning with intensity. "You think you're so innocent, don't you? But I know what you're doing. I know you're trying to drive me crazy, to make me jealous. Well, it's working."
“I’m not, I swear.” You say.
Matt scoffs, his grip on the wheel tightening. "You expect me to believe that? After everything that's happened tonight, you expect me to believe that you weren't trying to make me jealous?" He turns towards you, his eyes meeting yours. "Fucking try again, sweetheart."
Matt's face twists in anger, his voice rising. "You want to play games with me? Fine. Let's play. But you need to understand, I always win." His hand reaches out, his fingers brushing against your thigh, sending a shiver down your spine. After a few minutes you guys arrive home.
As soon as the car stops, Matt is out the door and pulling you along behind him. He practically drags you inside the house, slamming the door shut behind you both. Once inside, he spins you around to face him, his eyes wild with a mix of anger and desire.
“Matt I-
Matt's hand comes up, silencing you as he crashes his mouth onto yours in a brutal, possessive kiss. His tongue invades your mouth, claiming you as his, as his hands roam your body, grabbing, squeezing, marking you as his. Matt's kisses become more frantic, his hands tearing at your clothes, desperate to have you bare before him. Once your clothes are off, he scoops you up, carrying you upstairs to his bedroom and tossing you onto the bed.
Matt climbs onto the bed, crawling over to you, his eyes full of hunger. He hungrily kisses down your body, pausing at your breasts to give each nipple a hard suck, before continuing downwards to the apex of your thighs.
“Mmh” you whine.
Matt grins up at you, his eyes dark with lust as he spreads your legs wider, his fingers running along your inner thighs, teasing, toying with you before finally, he dips his head and licks at your pussy, his tongue delving deep, fucking you with it as he devours you.
“Mmhp fuck Matt” you moan at the sudden pleasure.
Matt growls in response, the sound vibrating against your sensitive flesh as his tongue continues its relentless assault on your clit, his fingers curling inside you, stroking your inner walls, coaxing your release. "You like that, baby? You like me eating you out, making you cum on my face?"
You nod pathetically. “Mhm feels so good.” You moan.
"Fuck, you're such a dirty little slut for me," Matt growls, increasing the pace of his tongue and fingers, his mouth slurping loudly at your pussy as he fucks you harder.
“Matt I’m so close” you moan arching your back.
"Cum for me, baby," Matt urges, sucking hard on your clit while he rubs his fingers over that sensitive spot inside you, pushing you over the edge, "Fuck, that's it, cum all over my face."
You let out a loud moan as you cum hard.
Matt laps up your release greedily, his tongue swirling around your clit, prolonging your pleasure. As you come down from your high, he pulls back, his chin dripping with your arousal, and grins up at you with a possessive, satisfied look. "You taste so fucking good, baby.”
"I'm not close to done yet, baby," Matt says, climbing up your body. He takes your lips in a deep, passionate kiss, letting you taste yourself on his tongue.
You quickly melt into the kiss letting out a moan.
Matt's hands roam your body, caressing your curves as he deepens the kiss, his hardness pressing against your thigh. He breaks away, panting, and gazes into your eyes, his own burning with desire. "I need to be inside you, baby. Now."
“Mh please Matt.” You whine.
Matt positions himself between your legs, his thick cock bobbing as he lines up with your entrance. With a powerful thrust, he buries himself to the hilt inside you, a low growl rumbling in his chest as he starts to move, pounding into you with ruthless intensity.
“Fuck! Matt” you moan in pleasure and pain at him stretching you out, not letting you adjust.
"You feel that, baby? You feel how deep I am in you?" Matt pants, his hips snapping forward relentlessly, each thrust pushing you up the bed. He grips your hips hard, angling them to take him even deeper, causing your belly an outline of his dick.
“Mmhp”
Matt's breath hitches as he watches you, his eyes blazing with a fierce, possessive hunger. He leans down, capturing your lips in another bruising kiss, swallowing your moans as he pistons into you, each stroke hitting that spot inside that makes your vision blur. His hands go down to your stomach bulge pressing on it.
“Mmh Matt” you moan.
"That's right baby, take all of me. Fuck, you're so tight and wet," Matt groans, feeling the rhythm building between you.
“Matt I’m gonna cum” you whine.
"Cum for me, baby, cum all over my cock," Matt commands, his thrusts becoming more erratic as he chases his own release. He pinches your clit, rubbing the sensitive nub in time with his thrusts, pushing you towards the edge.
“Mmhp fuck” you moan as you cum.
Matt's cock throbs as he feels your pussy clench around him, milking him for every drop. With a guttural grunt, he buries himself deep and erupts, painting your insides with his hot seed.
You lay there with your legs already weak, trying to catch your breath.
“Fuck, you liked that?” Matt says, pulling out from you.
You nod slowly.
Matt smiles, a satisfied smirk spreading across his face as he collapses beside you, wrapping his arms around you and pulling you close. "Good," he whispers, his breathing still ragged. "Because I'm not done with you yet."
“What?” You ask.
Matt's eyes glint with mischief as he starts to nibble on your ear, sending shivers down your spine. "I said, I'm not done with you yet," he repeats, his voice low and husky. "We're just getting started."
Matt starts to explore your body with his hands, cupping your breasts and tweaking your nipples. He then trails his fingers down your stomach, making you gasp as he gently grazes over your still sensitive mound before delving between your legs again.
“Mhh Matt” you whine as you feel your pussy getting wet again.
"Good girl," Matt praises, his fingers teasingly dancing around your pussy lips before plunging in deep, fucking you with them. "You're so fucking wet for me. You want more, don't you?"
You moan as you lean your head back. “Mhm” you nod.
"That's what I thought," Matt says, his fingers curling inside you, hitting that spot that makes your toes curl. He adds a third finger, stretching you open as he pumps them in and out at a relentless pace.
“Ahh fuck”
"You like that?" Matt grins, leaning down to suck on your nipples, his fingers still driving into you relentlessly. "You're so fucking sexy when you lose control like this."
“Matt, I'm so close, I’m gonna cum” you moan.
Matt feels your pussy clenching around his fingers as you get closer to the edge. He sucks harder on your nipples, fucking you faster and deeper until you finally cry out, your orgasm washing over you like a tidal wave. "That's it, baby,"
With tears of pleasure running down your cheek you moan loudly as you cum.
Matt watches your face as you cum, feeling incredibly satisfied seeing the pleasure he's giving you. He slows down his fingers, gently milking the last of your orgasm from your sensitive pussy. "Fuck, that was hot,"
Matt grins, withdrawing his fingers and bringing them up to his mouth, sucking your juices off them. "You taste as good as you look, baby," he growls. “I want more.” He leans down, his head in between your thighs.
Matt's tongue snakes out, licking your pussy from top to bottom, sending shivers down your spine. He focuses on your clit, sucking and licking it until you're moaning again, your body trembling with pleasure.
“Mhh Matt too much” you whine.
Matt ignores your protests and continues his relentless assault on your clit, his tongue flicking and swirling around it as he devours your pussy like a man starved. He knows just the right spots to touch, suck, and lick to drive you wild.
“Maaatt” you moan in overstimulation as you try to push his head away.
Matt doesn't stop, he continues to lick and suck your clit. He teases your entrance with his fingers, dipping them in slightly before pulling back out. He wants to push you over the edge again and make you cum even harder this time.
“Fuck Matt Mmhp” you moan in pain and pleasure arching your back.
Matt grins against your pussy, his tongue doing its magic as it swirls around your throbbing clit. His fingers finally enter you, plunging deep into your wet and aching sex, thrusting in and out in sync with his tongue on your clit.
“Matt I-“ you moan loudly as you squirt on his fingers, feeling a kind of pleasure you’ve never felt before.
"Fuck yes, squirt for me baby," Matt growls, his fingers pumping harder as you gush around him, your juices coating his hand. He sucks your clit harder, his tongue lashing against it as he drinks down every drop of your release.
“Mmhp Matt stop” you cry feeling overstimulated.
Matt doesn't stop right away, he pulls back slowly, easing you down from your high before completely pulling his fingers out of your dripping wet pussy. He licks his fingers clean, his gaze never leaving yours as he smirks. “I want you to squirt on my dick”
With tears still running down your cheeks you say “Matt I- I can’t”
"Can't or won't?" Matt challenges, his voice low and intense. He rises up, towering over you, his dominant presence filling the room. "You're going to squirt on my dick, and you're going to do it like a good girl for me,"
Matt's eyes flash with desire as he takes in your half-hearted protest. He grabs your hips, pulling you towards him as he positions himself at your entrance. "You're going to take my cock, and you're going to love every second of it," he growls, his tip teasing your still-sensitive pussy.
“Mmmmh Maaatt”
Matt slams into you with a powerful thrust, burying his thick cock deep inside your tight heat. He sets a punishing pace, driving into you over and over, his heavy balls slapping against your ass with each stroke.
Your vision blurs and you moan in overstimulation.
"That's right, moan for me," Matt growls, his grip on your hips tightening as he pounds into you. He leans down, his hot breath fanning over your ear as he whispers, "You're mine, and I'm going to fuck you until you can't walk straight."
“Ma- Matt mmhfp t-too much” you whine.
Matt ignores your whimpers, continuing to pound into you with reckless abandon. He reaches between your bodies, his fingers finding your clit and pinching it hard, sending jolts of pleasure-pain through your oversensitized body. "You're mine, and I'll use you however I want,"
Your back arches and tears run down your face. “Ahh mmph”
Matt's eyes gleam with triumph as he feels your body begins to surrender to his unrelenting assault. He fucks you harder, faster, his cock brutalizing your pussy as he drives you towards the edge of a violent orgasm. "Yes, cum for me, baby,"
“Ma- Matt I’m going to c- cum” you moan.
Matt's face twists into a feral snarl as he feels your body tense up, your pussy muscles contracting around his cock as you reach the precipice. "Do it," he growls, his hips pounding into you with increased ferocity. "Come all over my cock, baby."
One last thrust and you squirt hard all over his dick, your body trembling.
Matt roars with triumph as he feels your pussy spasm around him, your juices gushing out in a hot, sticky torrent. He buries himself to the hilt, grinding against your cervix as he unleashes his own release, his cock throbbing and pulsing as he fills you with his seed.
Your legs still trembling from the pleasure.
Matt grins triumphantly, withdrawing his cock from your well-used pussy with a wet, squelching sound. He reaches down, kissing you. “One more. You can give me one more, yeah?”
Matt's eyes gleam with amusement at your speechless response, his fingers tracing the curve of your jaw as he tilts your face up to his. "Oh, you can't even talk? That's how I know I did it right," he whispers, his voice husky with satisfaction.
Matt's gaze darkens as he takes in your flushed, disheveled appearance, your body still trembling from the aftershocks of your orgasm. He smirks, leaning in close, his breath hot against your ear. "I'm going to make you cum again, baby. And again.”
Matt's hands roam your body, his touch possessive and demanding as he turns you over onto your stomach. He positions himself behind you, his hard cock pressing against your entrance as he spreads your legs wide. "Get ready, because this time, I'm going to fuck you raw,"
Matt slams into you without warning, his thick cock driving deep into your pussy with a brutal force that steals your breath. He sets a punishing pace, his hips slapping against your ass with each rough thrust as he takes you with unbridled aggression.
You let out a scream. “Ahh Matt mmh too much stop.”
Matt's eyes flash, his grip on your hips tightening until it's almost painful. "You think that's too much?" he growls, pulling out before slamming back into you with a force that makes you cry out.
Matt's thrusts become more desperate, his cock throbbing deep inside of you as he claims you over and over again. "I could fuck you like this for hours,"
”s-stoop” you cry.
Matt's face contorts with a mix of lust and possessiveness as he hears your pleas. He reaches down, his fingers finding your clit and pinching it roughly. His hips still pounding into you with relentless intensity.
Feeling too much pain and overstimulation you scream out the safe word. “Red! Red”
Matt's movements freeze immediately at the sound of your safe word. He withdraws from you, his cock slipping out with a wet sound. His breathing is ragged as he turns to face you, concern etched on his features. "Fuck, baby, I'm sorry. I got carried away.
Upon seeing you're still in pain, Matt quickly moves to gather you in his arms, holding you close as he kisses your forehead softly. "I'll make it up to you, I promise," he whispers, genuinely remorseful. "I didn't mean to hurt you, love.”
“It’s fine Matt, don't worry, i- it was just too much” you say and hug him back.
Matt's arms tighten around you as he holds you close, his chin resting on top of your head. "I should have been more mindful. You're always my priority, and I fucked that up," he murmurs, his voice laced with regret. "Let me take care of you, okay?"
Matt carefully pulls back and looks at you, his thumb gently brushing aside a stray tear from your cheek. "C'mon, let's get you cleaned up," he offers softly as he helps you out of bed and leads you towards the bathroom.
In the bathroom, Matt starts the shower for you and checks the water temperature to ensure it's comfortable. He then helps you into the shower, making sure you're steady on your feet before joining you under the warm spray.
You chuckle at his sweet actions. “Thank you Matt. I'm fine by the way.” You reassure him.
A small, genuine smile tugs at the corners of Matt's mouth at your reassurance. He wraps his arms around you from behind, pulling you back against his naked chest as the water cascades over you both. "I know you are, baby, but I still need to make sure," he says, his deep voice filled with affection. "You mean everything to me." he replies, his voice gentle as he reaches for the soap and begins to lather it on your skin.
You smile at his words and give him a kiss on the cheek.
Matt's eyes crinkle at the corners as he smiles, clearly pleased by the gentle kiss. He turns his head, catching your lips in a soft, tender kiss. The soap slips from his fingers, forgotten, as he focuses on the gentle moment between you. "I love you,"
“I love you more” you say.
Matt's smile widens, and he deepens the kiss, his lips moving slowly and sweetly against yours. As you break apart for a breath, he whispers, "Impossible. I love you infinitely." He pauses, his eyes locking onto yours, filled with adoration.
You giggle into the kiss.
After a few minutes he washes the soap off you and grabs a towel and puts it over you.
Matt wraps the towel around your warm, damp body and lifts you effortlessly into his arms, cradling you against his chest. "Let's get you dried off and into something comfortable," he says, his voice still gentle from your shared moment in the shower.
Matt carries you out of the bathroom and into your bedroom, setting you down on the edge of the bed. He quickly retrieves a soft t-shirt and sweatpants from your dresser and helps you into them, making sure you're snug and cozy before letting the towel fall to the floor. "There, all better?"
“Yes! Thank you” you hug him and give him a soft kiss.
Matt hugs you back, his arms wrapping around you tightly as he returns the kiss with equal tenderness. He holds you close for a moment, enjoying the warmth and comfort of your embrace. "Anytime, love," he murmurs against your lips before pulling back slightly to gaze at you with a warm smile.
“Let’s go to bed, I'm tired.” You say yawning.
"Bed it is," Matt agrees, his voice low and soothing. He helps guide you under the covers, making sure you're nestled in comfortably before climbing in himself. Once settled, he wraps his arms around you, pulling you close against his chest. He grabs his phone and chuckles. “Two unread messages from Nick”
You chuckle “what do they say?”
“‘Wow thanks for telling us you went home’ ‘we are taking an Uber’ that was ten minutes ago” Matt chuckles as he reads the texts.
“Ten minutes ago?” You ask.
“Yeah, they’ll be here anytime soon. Why?” Matt asks.
“Matt! My clothes are still downstairs!” You say.
Matt was about to speak but he heard noise downstairs, the front door opening and some voices.
“Shit” you both say.
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arranged [thomas shelby x reader smut]
[ i’ve never written about one of cillian murphy’s characters but oppenheimer has me feeling a bit inspired lately. i haven’t watched peaky blinders in ages, so apologizes if it’s not completely accurate to the storyline. ]
[update: arranged part 2 ]
word count - 2.1k
[ summary - the reader and tommy agree to an arranged marriage that suits both of their needs. despite their disliking of each other, the two seem quite fond of each other in the bedroom, especially on their wedding night. ]
[ warnings - enemies to lovers trope that includes unprotected sex, oral, roughness, etc ]
-
thomas shelby was the last man i ever imagined myself being wedded to, but when my father unexpectedly passed and i no longer had the protection of his people, i had to find another way to make sure i wouldn’t be a victim to any gangs of birmingham - including the peaky blinders.
of course, tommy would never have married me if there wasn’t something i could offer him in return - that happened to be a ton of inherited money from my father, and several breweries i now technically owned, and numerous meeting spots that only i knew about, that the coppers would never find him or his family at, during anytime of the day.
despite the convenience of our arrangement, there was nothing favorable for either of us past the business side of things. our families had been at each other’s throats for years and now that my father was gone, a lot of that tension was, but nevertheless, you can’t expect a peaky blinder to not hold a grudge, even on their wedding night.
“see, that wasn’t so bad.” i mutter to my newly wed husband, walking into the dimly lit bedroom as i took off my white heels, setting them aside the now shut door. i watch as tommy began to unbutton his white dress shirt, and i sigh to myself, but loud enough to quirk his brow.
i tuck my hair behind my ears, walking to the bed and pulling the sheets down to prepare for what would hopefully be a fairly long sleep, given that i’d prefer not think much about who i was now standing across from.
“you don’t have to stay in here tonight if you don’t want to or even at all, tommy. you already have children and i’m aware you don’t want more, and frankly, i don’t want any, so just lie and tell polly the marriage was consummated tomorrow morning. go on.” i gesture my hand up and towards the door, watching his blank expression as i spoke in a more demanding, harsh manner.
he walked towards the bed, untucking his side, his shirt now unbuttoned and his toned, pale body at my exposure, which only made my cheeks redden as the muscles flexed with his movements. i may have despised the man for his profession, but it’s not like he wasn’t physically attractive.
“i may not be so found of you, mrs. shelby, but i do keep my marriage duties, at least to sleep beside you.” he says plainly, sitting down on the white sheets before looking up to me with a teasing expression. it almost felt wrong to see him show any emotion besides, well, none. “now, do i have to make you turn around while i fuck you, or can you bare the sight of me while doing so?”
i roll my eyes with a smirk, laying down and hovering my face above his before biting my bottom lip, glancing at his own with a bit of temptation, but nothing i couldn’t ignore for the sake of my ego. “i’m shocked you even asked to touch me, mr. shelby. peaky blinders have always seemed so forward with what they want.”
he tilted his head, his well-groomed hair bouncing lightly at the movement, now reaching over to hold the back of my neck, running his fingertips through the ends of my hair. “would you prefer i not ask? you didn’t strike me as the type of woman who’d prefer to be fucked like an animal.”
“you didn’t strike me as the type of man to wait until we were wed to even discuss sex, so we’re both a bit surprised. have you been distracted with other women through our engagement, dear husband?”
he scoffed at my comment, sitting up and leaning himself down to peck at my neck lightly, his heated breath against my tingling skin, a pit forming in my stomach at the touch he never dared grant me until now.
“you never gave me any suggestion to fuck before tonight, [y/n]. i assumed you wouldn’t allow me to lay a finger on you. this all seemed like a business opportunity, a plan for protection and financies, nothing more.” he muttered through his kisses, trailing his lips down to my covered chest before looking up to me again. “so, how about i ask you like a gentlemen, mrs. shelby. is this for business, or not?”
i shrug softly, glancing down to meet his seductive, icy blue eyes. “i think i’ll be able to tell if it is or not when you fuck me, mr. shelby."
he reached over to pull me on top of him, grabbing the white gown that dressed me and helping me to slip it off my core and past my arms, tossing it to the floor, which exposed me in nothing but my underwear, my breasts falling out of the fabric and resting before him. he took one hand to hold my back, the other cupping one breast and his thumb flicking at the hardening nipple. i feel him push me down, his lips attaching to the bud as i let out a soft moan, shocked by how sensual thomas shelby could be if directed to do so.
i could feel the bulge in his pants growing, beginning to grind myself against the black pants while he fondled my breasts with his mouth and free hand, the other that was once on my back now guiding itself down to my ass. he pulled himself away from my breast, panting softly to himself as the tension began to increase between our moving bodies.
“take off your panties and lay down on your back, won't you.” he said to me in a more demanding tone. i stood up and did so, spreading my legs before him as he undressed himself at the side of the bed, soon leaning down in front of me.
i chew my bottom lip at the sight of the man before me, but gasp as his tongue links to my clit, swirling and flicking around the sensitive bud of skin, while i only grow wetter through his touch and the saliva that collected against my entrance. i reach down to hold his head of black hair, my other hand resting against my chest while he continued to give me nothing but pleasure.
“this… this doesn’t seem… like b-business to me…” i stutter my words, my back arching at every sensitive touch he brought to my body. my words made him pull away, a smirk on his wet lips as he stuck one finger inside of me, pumping and curling it slowly enough to draw a loud moan from my lips before pulling it out right after.
he leaned down and gestured for me to open my mouth, sticking his finger inside for me to taste my own juices before pulling it out and licking it himself.
“neither does this, how wet you are for me. are you sure you want to take back the consummation of our arrangement, hm? it seems you like my tongue, mrs. shelby. do you think i’ll like yours?” he grinned, standing up and pointing his full erection towards me, holding it in one hand as i sat up on the bed.
i blush, getting off of the bed and onto my knees before him. i take his length into one hand, pumping it slowly as i look up to him, our eyes locked when i lean forward and take his tip into mouth, a heavy sigh coming from his lips as i begin to suck him off. he was thick and much longer than any man i’d ever been with, and frankly, if we were to sleep together tonight, i was a bit nervous of how my body would take him and the aftermath of it all tomorrow morning.
“fuck, fill your throat with me, [y/n]..” he moaned, both hands holding the back of my head as he thrusted himself towards my face. i took his cock down my throat, my eyes closing almost immediately as a tear runs down my cheek from the unexpected penetration, moving my head back and forth as his balls slap against my wet chin.
he tilted his head, mouth hung open as he watched me take him down my throat. i could hear his breath cutting short each time he thrusted, his cock twitching inside my mouth as he edged himself through each stroke. when he could tell through my reddening expression and glossy eyes that i was a bit overstimulated, he slowly pulled himself out of my mouth, leaning down to help me back on my feet and onto the bed.
he kneeled down before me, grabbing my face with both hands and pressing a passionate kiss against my lips, his tongue pushing itself into my mouth, which distracted me from the way he was moving my body off the bed again. he wraps his arms around me and guides me across the room and to the dresser, where he then breaks the kiss and turns me around, bending my body against the wood to where i made eye contact with the mirror that connected the furniture.
"i think this is worth the watch, don't you?" he teases, a devilish smirk across his face as he takes my neck in one hand, the other trailing before my pussy, his index and middle fingers attaching to my clit as he pushes himself inside of me without warning.
i gasp, watching my mouth open as he begins to fuck me, hard, against the dresser. the stimulation above my insides didn't make this any easier to take, given the fact i could already feeling my climax building in a matter of seconds.
i rest both palms against the wood, watching tommy's lips trail to my shoulder as he kissed against my sweating skin, leaving fresh hickeys from time to time, marking me like i was more than just an arrangement to him. if anything, this showed me that thomas shelby may not favor me, but he sure wanted the world to know i was his wife, and no one else's.
"i could fuck you all day, [y/n]. nothing fucking... compares to... how good you feel, fuck.." he muttered between kisses, looking up to meet my eyes in the mirror, his hand moving from my neck to hold my left breast tightly, halting it from bouncing throughout his thrusts. "do you feel me as much as i feel you?"
i nod, mouth still hung open, unable to even speak a word as tommy pulled my body closer, his fingers digging into my clit and forcing me to arch my back down, my ass pressing against him and causing even harsher friction between our bodies while he quickened his pace at the touch, the sound of our skin slapping together overpowering the bedroom.
i suddenly feel his arm wrap around my waist, and then the other, holding me so close and his body leaned so far down my back was touching his core. he thrusted deeper, further than what i even thought was possible for him to go, and so much so to the point i was in immense pain, but god, it felt so fucking good. his cock overpowered my entire body, and i felt my orgasm rushing to the surface, fluids leaking out from inside of me past himself and dripping between my legs, his own orgasm filling my insides within a matter of seconds after.
i feel him slide out of me, catching his own breath and helping turn me around to face him. he takes my hand and places the other on my back, guiding me to the bed once more and laying me down, pulling the sheet on top of me to cover my stomach down, my breasts exposed to the cold air. i feel his lips against my chest, lightly kissing from my nipples, to my shoulders, to my neck, and to my lips, once more. he smiles softly, and genuinely, to me, before snapping out of his sappy mood to grab a cigarette from the nightstand, lighting it.
"do you think we'll be doing this again?" he asks quietly, handing me the cigarette. "doesn't seem like it would be a negative thing to add to our arrangement, eh?"
i smirk, blowing the smoke out from my lips and towards the ceiling. "i wouldn't be opposed, but if you fuck me that hard every time, i'm not sure i would be able to get out of bed the next morning."
he chuckled to himself, standing up and walking to the other side of the bed, sliding himself into the sheets and putting out the cigar. he took me into his arms, lighting running his hand across my hair. "we can see about that. goodnight, mrs. shelby."
i rest my head against his chest, closing my eyes and smiling to myself, partially hoping tommy wouldn't see my vunerability.
"goodnight, mr. shelby."
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okay | r.l.
a/n: for my academically burnt out girlies (can you tell i’m one of them😭)
tw: fluff
remus lupin x reader
Remus quietly padded down into the common room, unsurprised to find you seated at the table with parchments and books scattered around you.
There was a puddle of drool spreading from where your face rested against a book, fast asleep. Remus internally winced; there was no way that was a comfortable position for your neck.
He gently brushes the tips of his fingers against your hairline and you immediately jolt awake, almost knocking his arm in the process.
You raise your hands to rub your eyes with slowed movements, the exhaustion lining your features painfully obvious. You turn to him, befuddled, before realising who it is and softening.
You looked adorable, mussed up hair and wide-eyed. It had Remus thinking about how it would feel to wake up to the sight for the rest of his life. “How long have you been up for, dove?”
He flattens his palms onto your shoulder blades, needling pressure into the tense muscles with his thumbs. You melt under his touch, your shoulders slumping. “Not very long,” you lie.
“It’s 4am, baby. You’ve been studying all night, haven’t you?”
You draw your bottom lip between your teeth, letting out a soft sigh. “Yeah… I guess. But I have to, there’s still three more chapters I’m not done revising. I just need more coffee.”
“The last thing you need right now,” Remus mutters as he lets go of your shoulders and lowers himself into a chair beside you, “is coffee. You need to get some rest, sweetheart. You’re not gonna be able to remember anything when you’re this tired.”
He uses his foot to push your chair around till you’re facing him. You reach for him immediately, sleepy movements causing you to lay your arms, bundled up, in his lap. Bemusedly, he takes your hands and starts to rub circles into your wrists.
“But I’m not tired,” you argue, though your eyelids look like they’re physically weighing you down. You’re blinking so forcefully Remus thinks it would generate enough energy to power a light bulb. “I just took a power nap and I’m good now.”
“That’s not enough, dove. It’s late, and you’re gonna be fucked up tomorrow. You need proper rest.”
“Do I?”
“You do.”
Your face is lovably scrunched up now, and Remus can’t tell if you’re trying to challenge him or if your brain really is that fuzzy.
He moves to gather your materials and you make a small noise of protest, dazedly shaking your head. “I can’t rest now, I need to finish studying first.”
You seem hardly able to track his movements, eyelids drooping shut every few seconds. “You can study tomorrow, sweetheart. You’ve studied enough for tonight.”
You huff, stubbornly staying put in your chair. Remus rises to his feet, tucking the stack of books in one arm before firmly pulling you up with the other. You stay silent, obviously annoyed but too exhausted to fight back.
He wraps his arm around your waist, pulling you into his side as he leads you up the staircase to his dorm. The anxiety in your features is palpable, and he feels bad for worsening it. But he knows you, he knows you would never feel like you’ve studied enough. You’d work yourself to the bone if you had it your way, so it was up to him to make sure you didn’t.
“You look exhausted, baby,” he murmurs as he bends down to press a kiss to your forehead. You visibly soften, your expression morphing into one less rigid. “I am exhausted.”
“I know,” he concedes, pushing you onto the bed until you’re properly laying down. “You’re gonna do better with rest, trust me. You’re gonna be okay.”
You hum weakly in response, eyes fluttering shut as soon as your head hits the pillow. Even in your dazed state, your arms extend towards him.
Remus lets out a soft chuckle and climbs into the bed next to you, pulling the covers over the both of you.
You shuffle towards him, seeking his warmth. He wraps an arm around your middle and tugs till you’re snugly pressed up against each other, pecking a kiss to the soft skin beneath your eye. “I meant what I said, alright? Don’t worry about the test. You’re gonna be okay.”
“Okay,” you whisper, and he feels that last bit of uncertainty you had melt away as you deflate. Your words come out muffled as you move impossibly closer, snuggling your face into his chest. “Okay. G’night.”
“Goodnight, sweetheart.”
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