#I’m generally just sorry for this
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my-catsface · 3 months ago
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Cat’s Mac and Parasite Water Recipe (Experience)
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Hello. I’m cat. Welcome back to my first addition of fucked up food recipes.
I have quite a history of doing stuff like this, and unfortunately I never learn my lesson. That being said, let’s get to it.
Fair warning: this comes with pictures. While none of them are inherently bad there are some of these that you could look at and go “yeah I would actually throw up if I didn’t know what that was” so be warned this isn’t just a food crime it’s a gross food crime.
I used chocolate almond milk because I’m lactose intolerant and I’m using Mac and cheese because I don’t really give a fuck about that.
The sprite is there because chocolate sprilk is one of my favorite drinks (I cannot recommend it to anyone even if my heart was full of malice), so the thought came to me. Why not try chocolate sprilk Mac and cheese?
Milk makes Mac and cheese creamier, and who knows what the sprite would do! So it’s an experiment.
I decided to start the dish with chocolate milk instead of water, filling THAT to the line.
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I could have definitely added sprite in at this stage, but honestly I wasn’t sure if carbonation would act right in the microwave, and I figured I could always try it different another time. I also thought maybe warm sprite would be the worse alternative to “lukewarm sprite mixed with warm milk” but I’m making a dish i called Mac and Parasite Water so what do I know.
Big mistake I didn’t account for. You can’t just put chocolate milk into the microwave for three and a half minutes. Apparently it rises and overflows. Anyone with even a shred of common sense may have anticipated this, but I am not a smart person (I’m making this dish after all).
What I ended up doing from here was watching the microwave and deciding to open it if it overflowed again. Most of it was done spilling out so I let it continue for about a minute and a half and took it out at the end (cleaned the microwave after).
I will say this was probably one of the peaks to this little project of madness. The smell? The smell in my room was SO good. Go figure warm chocolate would smell good but NO. No this was beautiful. Amazing. It just reinforced that what I was doing was good and just, and in that sense it was a siren.
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Anyway from here I just sort of mixed the Mac and cheese around and let it take in the chocolate milk. Still emboldened by the smell of warm chocolate, I thought to continue.
Here I did actually do a little taste test just because I was curious, and honestly it was a little underwhelming.
The best way I can describe it is like… processed something. There was some richness to it with the chocolate, sure, but it really was just still processed noodles. It’s like if you rolled honey into playdough until it was a jam (if you squint) and spread that out on wheat bread. That’s kind of what it tasted like and I would know because that’s also something I’ve done.
At this point… I added the cheese.
Now. The first thought that struck me when I was done mixing it was “god damn this looks awful.” The second thought that struck me was “you know, this place actually feeds me if I really want food.” My final thought was “I wonder what the cheese will look like.” The answer?
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UNHOLY MUCUS. Not the most unappetizing looking thing I’ve ever eaten but GOD DAMN it was CLOSE!! It was certainly CLOSE.
There’s many words that would be good here. Goo. Sludge. Goop. Muck. Grime. The word I will choose to use is “slime” because it strikes close to my heart.
I was in too deep. My smoke was too tough. If I didn’t eat this, They’d kill me. So I took a bite.
I say this with no ounce of exaggeration: It was GOOD. It was REALLY GOOD. The milk almost entirely covered up all the processed part of the cheese, and the cheese itself covered up the weird processed flavor of the noodles. The texture was absolutely top notch, too.
I would genuinely, GENUINELY, eat this again. In fact, I took three whole taste test bites as opposed to the singular one I was planning to take. It was so good I was almost worried about continuing with adding sprite. But I’m not one to back down from a challenge nobody imposed upon me, so I trudged on.
I added the sprite.
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I added the sprite up to the top of the Mac and cheese itself and suddenly my meal was very… very angry at me. I almost apologized to it, but it would have been hollow. But I didn’t feel anything. If meals can be made with love, this meal was not made with that. It wasn’t made with hate, though. No. This meal was made with morbid curiosity. This meal was made with divine hubris. I knew before I took a single bite that I had poisoned my ambrosia.
I wanted to discard it, to cast it away. It would be my monster and I it’s Frankenstein. Alternatively it would be my ai daughter thing and I it’s Ayin Lobotomy Corporation. But I’m not a fan of waste so I continued. I took a bite.
The taste? The taste was… bad. It was awful. I couldn’t even believe it was the same dish. It was like an acidic pond. The sprite overpowered both flavors and took the reins, beating the cheese and the milk into submission for its dominance. I took a bite and it tasted like penitence for all the sins I haven’t yet made. If there is a God, then there is his devil. And if there is a devil, this is what he eats. I have experienced a great fall from the light, and I wish nothing more than to be allowed to climb up and embrace it again.
I wanted to pray. But I knew mercy had closed its ears and wailed.
Once I ate the rest of the noodles I was suddenly made aware of my newest problem. The broth. As the milk and cheese mostly stuck to the noodles themselves, I was getting mostly noodles, cheese, milk, and whatever sprite my spoon picked up. That meant that for the most part my meal really was just the noodles.
No longer.
Now I was left with the reason this dish has gained its name. Look upon my next picture with horror, I beg of you.
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The remnant powder of the cheese was just… left there. Sitting. Sitting in a bowl of chocolate milk and sprite and tears. I realized I had to drink this. I looked at the same thing you’re looking at now and I realized I needed to DRINK that.
Thats about when the meal got its name. Gazing at my unlovable child I decided then and there that it looked like it would give me horrible unthinkable internal parasites. That’s what the little spots of cheese reminded me of. (Another contender was mold brew!) But I don’t like to waste things. I needed to drink it.
So I did. I took the cup, pinched it in on itself to make two points, and lifted one to my lips. I raised the cup up quickly, just desperate to get it over with.
In it went. Almost smoothly. And what did it taste like?
Nothing.
Even water has a taste. Even chocolate sprilk itself has A Taste. This thing? The parasite water itself? No taste. Nothing there. It was almost… disappointing. I even swished it around in my mouth for a bit to try and get SOMETHING. But it was for naught.
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My meal ended. It experienced life and death the same way that I would, and yet I think myself better than it.
Nyaaa~ time for the ending notes!
Wow that meal certainly Was! For anyone who wants to make this I would honestly recommend losing the sprite part of it and just making chocolate Mac and cheese.
It was honestly really good at that point and I’d say it was a really big highlight! SO.
If you make this forget the sprite, and ALSO either use less milk in the microwave or monitor it more closely than I did so that you don’t have any spillage (or do exactly what I did and just be ready for some paper towels.
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artsymeeshee · 2 months ago
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Wanted to make some supportive Ford
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glitchedcosmos · 4 months ago
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Can we talk about this? Because I just gotta.
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I feel like he needed to hear these words so much, he needed to hear that he’s not a beacon of darkness and destruction, that he can find the light, he can spread light and he absolutely needed to hear Maria tell him she wants him to be happy. He needed to hear that without it being a trick of the mind, or a dream for once, he needed it to feel real and it did.
And those words from Gerald, I think he needed to hear that too, that someone who took part in carving his dark path, was sorry for it, that even though it was his fault, regardless of intentions, he was sorry that , this, was the path he put him on, I feel like shadow needed to hear that, that he was sorry for his fate, but proud of him for how he walked it, and proud of him for how he fights. Saying he believes in him ( calling him son , he and Maria are such cannon siblings it’s crazy), I feel like he needed to hear these things, and remember every word.
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And in return he made a new promise to her, he’s gonna fight, as a shadow with light in his heart, with her wish, being his light.
He absolutely needed to hear those words from his family.
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mushramoo · 1 year ago
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did it very fast so I know it’s cringe and yucky etc but I want more first interactions between the Emilys and Aftons in game
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phoe-ix · 9 months ago
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Generation Loss: Season 2: yaoi loss or smth like that.
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oleafia-art · 12 days ago
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some golden guards + caleb
i wanted to take a break and do some character design of a few golden guards based off of some of the ones seen briefly in canon. i also drew hunter and caleb as references for faces and stuff. i tried to make them as similar as possible, but also looking very individual to one another. since belos claimed that hunter looks the most like caleb, i tried to stay true to that while keeping the other three looking similar but not quite as identical. anyways i love them <3 they’re like the most mentally ill family ever to me
these weren’t supposed to be real ocs or anything but then i ended up giving them names and backstories and so i wrote a little about them aaaand now im obsessed. i will try to make a full body ref for them, especially alistair and/or constance, if i have time
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i apologize for my godawful handwriting 💔
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spiders-and-swords · 4 months ago
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In addition to anime I’ve been watching, I’ve started the original FMA over again.
Also, I can’t believe I forgot about October 3rd this year. I kid you not I was watching the show and wearing my fullmetal shirt as well.
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hplonesomeart · 3 months ago
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@scimagic Uhhh made this because I just think they’re dynamic is neat. Also completely agree with the Puzzle headcanon super fun silly and very on point. As we speak he is clinging for his dear life :))
I really enjoy seeing the illustrated storyline you have unfolding between the two and figured it would be nice to see this motorcycle sequence in motion. So tadaa here it is! In animated form! Now your obligated to make a full length written novel in-depth about their relationship /j
Sincerely though thanks for the creative inspiration and keep on being a swagger artist 👍✨
#Whoops seems my hand slipped—silly me these aren’t my characters! Here’s your lovelies back sorry for abducting them momentarily :))#tagging people is scary I’m just going to hide under a rock after this gets posted jksjsksp#my brain goes ‘teehee my genius hidden evil scheme no one saw coming—yess I shall gift lovely artists fanart when they least expect it’ >:3#and then once it’s actally time to post my brain goes crisis mode and implodes#like why am I drawing attention to myself huh? why can’t I scutter off as a masked anonymous figure into the night#oh well at least we made a dope ass motorcycle animation hell yea. Hopefully you like it <3#honestly in retrospect kinda surprises me that Puzzles doesn’t have a helmet…pretty sure his screen is durable but not THAT durable#one oopsie woopsie and that thing will get cracked again <<#but then again where are you ever going to find a rectangle screen shaped helmet to fit his head jksjsksp#there’s simply no winning#oh uh also incase anyone wishes to know the logistics of making this….didn’t take too long just three days! Pretty speedy :3#ok now this is the part where I twiddle my hands and await results lol#…..also just occurred to me the motorcycle model should’ve been a Harley or Suzuki I’m just dumb and forgor#even tho it was specified in the tags of the initial post I referenced heavily#like I was staring at the art for reference + online material but that useful tidbit of tag information flew over my head :P#sorry all you get is the generic motorcycle model….mission failed better luck next time *dies*#hplonesome art#not my characters#gift for someone else#do I even need to specify that in tags NO CLUE I’M PARANOID/j
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inumbrapugnabimus-maybe · 5 months ago
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A Hyrule Warriors Zelda!
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Also Link! Though I probably won’t be finishing this particular sketch of him
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nicollekidman · 5 months ago
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buffy knows spike loves her during season five. buffy knows spike loves her when she comes back and seeks comfort/silence in his presence. and as she comes back to herself and tries to make peace with the fact that she’s Here Again, she still knows he loves her. and i think part of the Big Bad Grabbing The Slayer For The Darkness routine they both cling to is that it allows them to pretend this huge thing isn’t between them so they can get what they both want (someone to stay).
and like obviously buffy cannot allow herself to believe that he loves her for many reasons, but she DOES believe it, she can’t make herself unknow it even though she tries so hard. which is partially where the breakdown with tara in 6.13 comes from because the cognitive dissonance of soulless spike loving her as if he has a soul while she is so lost within herself that the only way she can reach for him is to use him (which would be fine if he was the big bad grabbing the slayer for the darkness) which is hurting him! unfathomably! but he’s supposed to be the corruption! how can he??? any of it???
meanwhile spike has watched the woman he loves be brought back as a shell and he wants to see the light in her eyes and he can touch her now and sometimes that’s enough to make her laugh but he can’t linger in those moments or she’ll go away again! so he can play the role he needs to play so she’ll stay, as if he could keep her anywhere she didn’t want to be. as if he wants her to be in the dark instead of bringing him into the light. but how could he ask for anything more when he already got her back and he didn’t even need to kill her afterwards.
and so they hurt each other and he forgets himself and asks her if she even likes him and it’s too honest and he’s asking too much (he asks for nothing) so before she can throw her life away like it’s nothing, he puts the game face on, makes himself a target, and swallows it all. and she can’t unknow. and it would all be fine except he’s a vampire and she’s the slayer and how can he just say it like it’s nothing when she needs to beat his face in just to keep from screaming.
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greenfiend · 6 months ago
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I realize I cannot stand watching people’s reviews of ST (even though I love watching other reviews of things) because I know they won’t *get* the show.
They won’t understand all the subtleties, foreshadowing, references, all the hidden details etc etc. So yeah they’re always wrong about it imo. 😒
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duusheen · 28 days ago
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Happy anniversary! (No dinner because this game hates me)
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royaltea000 · 5 months ago
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Pose practice! ᕦ(ò_óˇ)ᕤ
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kyurochurro · 1 year ago
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TNG character sketches!! been wanting to draw this crew for a hot sec so I got around to it at 3 am last nite… LOL
(also I haven’t started tng yet but hey I dedicate this to my DAD big tng fan first Trekkie I ever met SHOUTOUT TO YOU DAD 🗣️)
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dovesick · 1 month ago
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moth shirah
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crybaby-bkg · 1 year ago
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Bakugou asks you to join him during one of his photoshoots for a pro hero campaign. he doesn’t understand the point of it, nor why he has to only be in his underwear, but he doesn’t mind it much when he gets to look over to your shy little face.
you’re propped up in a corner on an old couch, laptop perched in your lap, its glare bright despite the way you never really look at it. you’re supposed to be catching up on some work, but you’ve been distracted by the glorious sight that is the love of your life.
when he looks at you, do you duck down, eyes suddenly focused on your screen again. it only makes him smile a little, step away from the assistant of the photographer who comes up to him, calls out your name.
“Huh?” your head whips up with a quickness neither of you expect, goes to show just how invested you really were with your work. but Bakugou only grins at you now, jerking his chin over to you as he grabs the bottle of oil the assistant was trying to pour over him.
“C’mere and gimme a hand, won’t ya?” he asks you, boyish smile gracing his face as he tilts his head at you. immediately, your face warms as you put together the request that’s suddenly dropped in your lap. everyone in the studio looks at you, with both envious and excited gazes, and it only makes you shrink in on yourself.
“I hate you.” you mutter under your breath when you finally rise up from your place on the couch, which he somehow hears. but Bakugou only laughs at you, grabs you by the waist when you’re close enough to kiss you breathless in front of everybody, before he’s handing off the oil to you.
“Such an attention whore,” you whisper when you’re close, the air between the two of you thick. everyone tries to look away, give you guys a bit of privacy, but it’s hard when such a soft and amused look passes over the usually rough and hardened hero’s face.
“Only for your attention.” he grunts back to you, holding his arms out for you to start dripping the oil down his skin. it’s a sensual gesture, the softness between you two sliding into something more, something that you only ever reserve for the bedroom.
you tip the bottle over his shoulders until it drips down his chest, massaging it all in with your hands in crude, circular motions. you can see the way he bites his lip, ignore the way he looks at you down the bridge of his nose lest you two create a scene not meant for the public eye. you gather more oil, warm it between your palms, kneeling in front of him to help massage it into the defined muscles of his stomach.
you ignore the twitch in front of you, swallowing thickly, glancing up to Bakugou who hasn’t taken his eyes off of you yet. you mouth at him to behave, but he only grins, something feral.
“We only need it above the waistband.” the photographer suddenly calls out, snapping you back to attention. you stand on shaky knees, nodding with your eyes casted low, ashamed, that your freak of a man had you doing something so…so—
“Go wait in my dressing room, yeah?” Bakugou asks you, pulling you in close to peck at the corner of your mouth. “Gonna wrap this shit up.” he promises you, and you can only nod silently, mind going a mile a minute. but before you go, you remember to grab the oil. just in case.
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