#I’m also like lowkey paniced as well because I’ve never been in a relationship before and like WHAT

[luxgay]

yall i went on a second date tonight!! we got thai food and went to an arcade bar to play cabinet games with quarters. we bought each other drinks and played co-op games shoulder-to-shoulder. it was packed in there too so we were close to each other, leaning in, brushing elbows, we laughed so much 🥹 I’m just sitting at home, incapable of doing anything else rn because I’m cheesing at the fact that I like this guy and I feel like I’m in middle school crushing

[sugaxjpg]

infamous; m

⤷  You would rather die than to have someone figure out about your sexual escapades with Local Fuckboy, Kim Taehyung. It was an ego thing. 

✓ Couple: Taehyung x Reader | Fuckboy!AU & SecretRelationship!AU

✓ Filed under: smut 

✓ Look out for: bathroom sex, breast play, oral (male receiving) + deepthroat, fingering, dirty talk, unprotected sex (use condoms or i’ll kill u!!!), mirrors,switch!tae and switch!reader, taehyung being lowkey a prick but we’re all in for it 

✓ Words: 12,508

Author’s Note: Of course my year-long hiatus would end with a smut. What else can I say? I can hear the clown music from here. 

“Like, can you actually believe that? He ghosted me for three weeks, then he had the nerve to ask for a tit pic.” She sighed, taking a slip from her neon green drink. You didn’t know how Hyejin could ingest something that resembled toxic waste and make it seem like it actually brought her some sort of comfort. “You know what? I’m done with men. All of them. We really are living in the medieval ti— Are you even listening to me?” 

You blinked twice, taken off guard by the clicking of her fingers in front of your eyes. Truth was, you were only half present, the other half of you scrutinizing the living room, trying to find a certain someone amongst the agglomeration of bodies. 

“Yeah, sure, sorry,” you apologized, leaning your side against the wall. Behind Hyejin, two guys started yelling about something related to Harry Potter and you couldn’t care less. “I was somewhere else for a second, but I’m here now. You were saying that he ghosted you?”

“Yeah, like an absolute idiot.” She rolled her eyes, gesticulating aggressively. You nervously watched the movements of the radioactive cup, worried that it would splash all over your clothes. You really should’ve thought twice before combining a white blouse with your black skirt — that was a catastrophe waiting to happen. “I’m never talking to him again. Or any man.”

“Hm,” you hummed, crossing your arms. You didn’t know who she was trying to convince, that must’ve been the fifth time you heard your friend giving you that speech (during that semester alone). “Who’s that again? Hoseok?” 

“The one and only,” she agreed, glimpsing at her side as if someone could even hear you two amongst the loud reverberation of the music. “Really, I don’t know how those guys haven’t been thrown out of the campus yet. They’re a hazard, all seven of them. A threat to public health.”

You shrugged. “From what I’ve heard, they pay their tuition and do well in class. That’s as far as the college cares.” 

She groaned. “I guess.” Another slip. A pause. Another one. Yep, you were designated driver for the night. “Could be worse, though, I could be one of the poor chicks that Taehyung fucks in his spare time.” 

Oh. 

You giggled, nervous. “Yeah, yeah,” you agreed, looking back at the mass of students. “Yeah, that’d be awful.” 

She hummed in concordance, taking her cup back to her lips. The two guys behind her decided to quit the arguments and moved away from the two of you, making you follow their figures as they dissipated amongst the crowd. You didn’t know how college parties managed to squeeze so many people in one small living room, but it was one of the mysteries of life, you guessed. 

“I don’t know what’s the deal with that one,” Hyejin continued. “It’s like he has a golden dick or something.” 

You furrowed your eyebrows, turning your attention back at her. “What do you mean?” 

“Doesn’t matter, he’s a complete douche.” She moved her hand as if she was scaring away an invisible fly. “Don’t even think about him. He’s the kind that uses and discards people.”

“You think so?” You asked.

“I know so,” she said. “I couldn’t even count on my fingers the amount of girls that had one night stands with Taehyung, and somehow became completely whipped by the dude, only to be told that he doesn’t ‘fuck the same person twice’. Like… What the fuck is that? Who says that?”  

You laughed, noticing the tinge of red that covered her cheeks. “You sound really drunk.” 

“So?” She asked. “I’m not bullshitting you. Taehyung is a prick and that’s gospel.” She raised her cup in a silent cheer, and took another slip. “I know you’re not involved in the fuckboy phenomena that plagues this campus, and, honestly, you’re better off that way. But trust me when I say that he isn’t worth the headache.” 

With an inattentive nod, you took another peek at the strangers in the room. “I believe you, don’t worry.” 

The worst part? You did. 

Even worse? There were two things wrong with what she had told you. 

Number one: yes, Taehyung was kind of a jerk sometimes. But he wasn’t completely soulless. He was fun to be around, actually, when he wasn’t surrounded by his smooth-brained friends, or trying to impress someone into sleeping with him. Also, you were pretty sure he told at least most of those girls that he wasn’t searching for anything serious, and a one-night stand was most likely all that they would get. 

You couldn’t speak for all of them, of course, but the ones that you knew personally, at least, had mentioned something along those lines to you. He didn’t exactly lead them on, trying to break their hearts just for the sake of it. Besides, Taheyung was already kind of infamous around campus for “using and discarding” people, as Hyejin had put, so it wasn’t precisely a surprise for anyone involved. 

Number two: Taehyung fucked the same person twice, if he felt like it. And you knew that because you’ve been fucking him on and off for the past five months or so. 

To your defense, you weren’t exactly after a “secret friends with benefits” relationship when you first met him. In fact, you didn’t expect that you would fall victim to his charms just like everyone else, melting under his tender kisses, moaning his name as he rolled his hips against you, edging your orgasm for longer than you could hold it. And you didn’t expect to like it as much as you did. 

Truth was: Kim Taehyung was everything, but he wasn’t dumb. He knew that he was attractive as hell; he knew that he had a voice so silky and deep that just saying the right words would be enough to have you in bed with him — and he knew how to use two two things very well. So, just like Eve, you followed the snake and bit the apple, and blah blah blah, eternal damnation or something like that. Big deal. 

You didn’t care much about being fuckbuddies with Taehyung, actually — he had his fun with other people in the meantime, and so did you —, but you pretty much could die at the idea that someone would find out. It was an ego thing, alright? You didn’t want people to know that you were interested in him, since you prided yourself in being a strong, independent woman, and to have people think that you were wrapped around his finger (which you absolutely wasn’t!) would not be a good look for your personal brand. 

And it got more complicated than that. The thing was that Taehyung had always been one to flaunt around his trophies. It wasn’t unheard of for him to just start talking about someone that he had fucked, maybe even giving a bit more detail than anyone else involved would appreciate. You knew that it was just a matter of time before your name dropped from his lips at the wrong time, in front of his ape-brained friends, and everyone would discover that you were added to his long lists of booty calls. 

So, when you asked to keep that first night a secret, you were surprised when he quickly accepted it. 

Against all expectations, Taehyung didn’t fall into his old pattern when it came to you. He had been the one to text you first, calling you over to his place — which he made sure to be empty — and he had been the first one to suggest that you two kept meeting up after that. Now, let’s not get this mixed up: it wasn’t an undisclosed crush, it wasn’t love. It was just Taehyung fulfilling some weird-ass kink of his. He liked to have you when he wanted it, the way he wanted it, and he liked the thrill of it all being undisclosed — to him, it felt like you two were doing something wrong, which managed to turn him on even more. 

Also, you were human, alright? There was something extremely tempting about sleeping with someone as almighty as Kim Taehyung, King of Fuckboys, especially when he kept coming back to you. It’s only nature to want to feel special every once in a while. 

Again: it was an ego thing. 

Even if your pride told you otherwise, you decided, again and again, to come back to him. Late at night in your apartment, when your roommate had already gone to sleep, and he was buried deep between your legs, licking your wetness and sucking on your clit. Or maybe in the interval between your classes, when you two managed to get the locker rooms empty, and he fucked you so hard against one of the lockers that you could swear someone would come see what was going on with all that banging against the metal. 

But no, no one ever caught you. Not Hyejin or any of your other friends. As far as you were aware, Taehyung’s group didn’t know a thing either, which made you appreciate him even more. 

See? He wasn’t a total douchebag. He had the most basic sense of loyalty. 

And, yeah, you didn’t like lying to your friends, but it was a necessary measure. You were sure they would kill you if they found out about your private escapades with the Local Fuckface McGee: half out of sheer panic for your emotional well-being, and the other half out of pure jealousy. You didn’t think much about it most of the time, since you kind of understood Taehyung’s side: you simply liked the thrill, and you weren’t actually doing anything illegal. No one really had to know.

Rupturing the bubble of your nostalgia, your friend’s voice startled you back into reality. 

“Who are you looking for?” Hyejin furrowed her eyebrows, staring you down intensely. She had been your friend for three years, and you were absolutely certain she could see through your bullshit — well, most of the time. “Do you have a dick appointment that I don’t know about?” 

You laughed, your voice coming out an octave higher than you intended it to. “What? No!” So subtle, congratulations. “I’m just searching for a friend. She owes me a bit of money and she’s been avoiding me for some time.” 

You were impressed at the ease that the lie left your tongue. At the same time, you had been doing that for five months now — keeping your distance from mentioning anything Taehyung, figuring out excuses to get away from your friends at the weirdest of times — , so you guessed that was something that came with practice. 

“You want me to beat her up?” Hyejin offered. Just a glimpse was all that you needed to know that she was dead serious. “Give me her name. I promise I just wanna talk.” 

“No, it’s fine,” you said, chuckling at her aggressive demeanor. “It’s not a lot of money, I’m not super worried. I’m just tired of being avoided.” 

She smirked, taking another slip from her cup. How didn’t the drink end yet? That cup was infinite. “You and me both, sister.” 

Your lips parted, but, before you managed to let anything out, a loud sound of men screaming in excitement overlapped the beat of the electronic song. Hyejin met your eyes with a mixture of puzzlement and interest and, in an unspoken agreement, you two decided to see what the fuss was about. 

Lucky for you, you two didn’t even have to take two steps to figure it out. Since the large opening to the living room was right besides you, all that you needed to do was to take a look through it, right at the kitchen, to see the beautiful, Animal Planet view of Hoseok drinking beer upside down. 

“Hyejin?” You called calmly, eyes still glued to the spectacle.

“Yes, love?” She answered, absent-minded. 

“You know who’s throwing this party, right?” 

She shrugged. “I might.” 

You suspired, taking a step back so you could stare at her. Behind you, people walked towards the kitchen, pumped to see if Hoseok could drink the entire thing (as if he didn’t do that in every single party he throwed). “So, there’s any other reason why you dragged me to Hoseok’s party, besides one that you needed someone to keep you company while you waited to be dicked down?” 

“Great deduction, Sherlock.” She smiled, eyes shining in enthusiasm. You looked at Hoseok, then back at Hyejin. Maybe she wouldn’t have any grounds to judge you and Taehyung after that circus performance. “I’ll make it up to you, don’t worry.” 

“I’m not worried about that.” You crossed your arms. Seokjin, who was holding Hoseok by the ankles, pterodactyl-screeched in joy as the boy reached the end of the beer. Two more slips and he’d be good to go. “You sent him the tit pic, didn’t you?” 

Hyejin licked her lips, taking a hand up to fix her hair. “I’m only human,” she said. “Besides, I had already invested a lot on him. I even did a full body shave. I couldn’t just not do it.” 

You laughed at the idea, watching as she became more and more distracted by the man. A group had already formed around Hoseok, and you knew it was just a matter of when Hyejin would do the same. 

“What happened about being over all men?” You asked. 

“Yeah, yeah… After tonight. Right now I’m planning to get under one.” She gave you her neon green cup with a harsh movement, and you held it without thinking much about it. “I’ll see you later, Y/N. Hold my drink for me.”

“Have a great night, I guess,” you raised the sound of your voice as she began to walk away. “Text me when you get home!” 

She responded without turning back, giving you a thumbs up over her head. “You too, girlie!” 

And, just like that, she was gone. 

Disappointed but not surprised, you sighed and placed your body back against the wall. From the kitchen, a roaring applause exploded, and you knew that Hoseok had finished his Herculean task. Good for him. 

You stared down. The sharp shade of green reflected on the skin of your hands, looking like something straight out of Chernobyl. You took the cup to your nostrils and gave it an experimental sniff, your nose cringing at the appalling smell. Fighting the disgust that had built in your stomach, you quickly took it away from your face, and decided to place it on a table nearby. No wonder Hyejin was so out of it, the poor girl was suffering from radiation poisoning. 

The Chainsmorkers started to play and you asked yourself why the fuck was Satan in charge of the music. All around you, strangers fumbled to the rhythm of the song, a girl even falling to her knees at one bad turn of the ankle, then turning her gaze up at her friends and laughing maniacally. The odor that enveloped you was strong and nauseating — Axe body spray, probably — and the thumping of the sound was starting to get annoying. Since you were alone with your thoughts, there wasn’t much left besides to hyperfocus on those details, which was all but a pleasant pastime. 

You crossed your arms, bored out of your mind, and thought that it might be the wiser decision to go back to your place and just sleep the night off. Yeah, the semester was already ending, most of your tests and projects had passed, but that didn’t mean you weren’t completely exhausted at all the accumulated stress you had endured. Now that Hyejin had moved on with her plan, you didn’t have much of a part to play in that party anyways. 

A couple almost tripped on you as they giggled their way towards the stairs, probably searching for an available room. What a nice reminder. You pressed your lips together, then peaked back at the kitchen, where you only saw Seokjin, Namjoon and Jungkook leaning over a pile of red cups — Yoongi right behind them, seeming like he was about to kick the whole thing down. You didn’t know where Taehyung was, but he most likely already left with someone else. 

You turned back to your previous position, crossing your arms in frustration. Great. Your friend was after her sexting partner, and your own booty call was probably balls deep inside someone else by then. Really, there wasn’t much that you could do in there. It would be better if you just left while your dignity was still intact. 

With a sigh, you pushed your body away from the wall, fumbling with your purse. You were praying that Hyejin remembered to give you the car keys, otherwise you would be trapped in that place for god knows how lo��� 

Oh there he fucking was. 

The moment that you saw Taehyung, sitting on the couch across the room from you, it was like you forgot to breathe for a moment. That little demon incarnated looked better than you had anticipated — dressed in all black, with his thighs spread across the seat, ready to be fucked right then and there. His dark hair was parted in the middle, a few stubborn strands falling over his angelic features, and his thumb distractedly circled his lower lip as his gaze navigated around the room, staring at nothing in particular. Next to him, you could see another one of his friends — Jimin, if you were not mistaken — talking about something animatedly, but the other man was paying no attention. 

His expression was one of irritation, you noticed, with his thick eyebrows moving together, jaw clenching. It was pretty erotic, if you said so yourself. You didn’t know what Jimin was telling him, but you sure hoped he wouldn’t stop anytime soon. 

When he saw you, however, Taehyung’s perceived annoyance instantly dissipated. 

With your mind racing in anticipation, you watched as his eyes met your own, then trailed down your body with desire, stopping around the level of your thighs for a bit longer than you had predicted. You knew that stare awfully well — it was the same one that Taehyung gave you when he saw you around campus, the silent provocation that told you, and only you, that he really wanted to have some alone time right now. 

A sly smirk sprouted at the corner of his lips, and he leaned back against the couch. You followed his movements as he reached towards his pocket and came back with his phone, staring at you as he did so. The phantasmagoric white light casted odd shadows over his face as he unlocked it, taking a final glance at your expectant features before he started to type something. Once he was done, he locked his phone and placed it back where it had come from. 

Inside your purse, your own phone beeped happily. 

You licked your lips, trying your best to forge indifference as you reached for your device. You swore you could still feel his eyes still burning on you, impatient and deep, watching your every move with eagerness. 

[00:23] Taehyung: so glad to see that you came bby 

[00:23] Taehyung: do me a favor and meet me in the bathroom upstairs, will ya? Second door to the right ;) 

Yep, new plans: you would stay there a bit longer. 

Hammering against your chest, your heart seemed as if it was about to jump out of your mouth by the time that you turned your attention back to the couch. Taehyung, however, had already gotten up, and you had the chance to take a last glance towards his beautiful form as he walked towards the stairs. Jimin, from the couch, appeared to be as lost as they come. 

From the kitchen, the resounding complaint of the group you had seen before ruptured your hypnotized state — Yoongi had, in fact, kicked everything down. Taken aback by the carnality that permeated your chest, you locked your phone without typing an answer and leaned back against the wall, deciding it would be best to wait a minute or two before following him upstairs. Amongst your thoughts, a part of you was still judging whether you adored or despised Kim Taehyung, and the intoxicating effect he had on you. 

Finally, you decided to take the stairs. You wondered, as you opened your way through the ocean of sweaty bodies and spilling drinks, if you weren’t trying too hard to rationalize and catastrophize something that was actually very simple. It was a story with a start, a middle part, and a satisfying ending: you two wanted to fuck each other, you did, then you moved right on. No hidden feelings, no strings attached. That was it. Couldn’t get any better than that. 

Regardless, it wasn’t everything about that, and you knew it. It was about overhearing other girls talking as you made your way upstairs, complaining about how ridiculously hot he was, or about how he didn’t call them back after he gave them the best night of their lives. It was about having that steamy, trembling secret between the two of you. It was about knowing that yeah, Taehyung was crazy hot — and you could have that whenever you wanted. It was about hearing him complain about his friends, who told him that you’d never give him a chance, and seeing the delectable pleasure in which he vangloriared himself, knowing very well that you and him had a second life to share whenever suited. 

You reached the second floor with electric currents running through your veins, anticipation building like a tidal wave inside your abdomen. You two had never done something like that so close to so many people and, yet, you adored the idea even more. 

The cold metal of the door handle met the palm of your hand and you tried it once, twice, with no effect. After looking at the corridor and making sure that Taehyung was nowhere else to be seen — besides the fact that, if he didn’t manage to get the bathroom, he would surely text you a different location — you were left to assume that he wanted to know that it was you who waited at the other side. 

With a sigh, you took your phone out of your purse. Maybe your fingers weren’t as steady as you’d like them to be, but no one needed to know about that. 

[00:27] You: plz open the door thx

Expectantly, you placed your phone back and tried to overhear some sort of sound signifying that he was moving closer to the door — but the song was so loud that you could barely understand your own thoughts. The next seconds that you stood there, just waiting for him to open the door, had been the longest ones you had endured in your life. 

Eventually, however, the door creaked open. 

You gave one last, paranoid glimpse at the strangers in the corridor, but none of them seemed to notice that Taehyung hadn’t left the bathroom by the time that you came in, locking the door behind you. 

It was like stepping into a different reality. The lights inside the bathroom were absurdly bright when compared to the dim environment that expanded outside; the obnoxious song and chatter had instantly morphed into a muted exclamation outside of the door, only the reverberation of the bass making itself present. Just like the calm before the storm, there was a moment of tranquility between the instant that you locked the door, and the one that you saw him. 

As you turned around, dwelling in his proximity, you thought about a million things at the same time — about teasing him about his location choice, or maybe about how he must’ve been going through a drought, if he had to count on his covert booty call to get laid in a party. You thought about how gorgeous he looked, about how his eyes glistened in interest as he took a quiet step towards you, his roseate tongue coming out to lick his lips. 

Regardless, before you could say anything, Taehyung’s lips were on your own, attacking your mouth in a fervorous kiss. You whimpered in surprise as he pushed you against the closed bathroom door, his hands circling your waist as he squeezed your body against his. Your purse fell on the ground with a muffled sound, but you barely even noticed it. 

Taehyung had always been an intense kisser to say the least, but that night it was something else. That night, he was kissing you as if he physically couldn’t contain himself long enough to do anything else; as if all that he could think of doing was to feel the heavenly contact of your mouth against his, your fingers pulling on the strands of his hair. As he invited his tongue inside your mouth, Taehyung groaned and lowered his hands, squeezing your ass like he was about to lose every last ounce of sanity he had left in him. 

You sighed as he moved his focus onto your neck, placing open-mouthed kisses in a way that you knew would leave a mark the next day. “Someone’s excited,” you commented, slightly breathless. Your only response was another groan, and the rolling of his hips against you, where you could feel his cock, already semi-hard, pressing against your inner thigh. “Couldn’t even bother to take me somewhere else.” 

One of his hands moved up to your hair, pulling your head sideways so he could have a better access to your neck. “I need to have you now,” his deep voice came out muffled against your skin, the reverberations of his timbre propagating directly towards your center. 

“You’re starting to get more adventurous with this.” You bit down on your lower lip and he sucked your flesh, groping your ass once again. “Parties used to be so off limits to you.” 

Taehyung chuckled against your neck, moving back towards your mouth. He started making out with you again, his breath hot and heavy against your face, and you thought you could very well pass out at the level of craving that had built inside you. “I changed my mind.” He spoke as he leaned back. 

You smirked at his attitude. “We’ll end up getting caught.” 

“Aw, baby.” He pouted, looking at you with artificial pity. Okay, he could be kind of a prick sometimes. “You’re the one who’s worried. And you came all the way up here because you wanted to. You know I’m not one to insist.”

“I can leave, then?” You raised one eyebrow, fingers playing with the hair at the back of his neck. 

“You can, the door is right behind you,”  Taehyung told you, quickly losing interest in that conversation. “But something tells me you won’t.” 

You didn’t even try to respond, because there was nothing to be said: both of you knew what you were doing there, and the idea of walking out was just too ridiculous to consider. 

With a suspire, you watched as Taehyung moved his lips down your chest, stopping at the fabric of your blouse. 

“What if someone hears us?’ You suddenly remembered, heartbeat quickening at the thought. 

“What is it, baby?” He asked as his fingers worked on your buttons, exposing more of your torso. That slow pace of his was going to kill you one of those days. “You’re worried that people are going to find out about this? About us?” 

You opened your mouth to respond, but his chuckle — so deep and melodious — caught you off guard. 

“How scandalous, right? Y/N is not the pure little thing she makes herself to be,” Taehyung continued, finally opening your blouse and fully exposing your bra to him. He licked his lips at the sight, humming with delight. “Red lace? You really want to tease me.” 

You swallowed dry as the man took the fabric off your shoulders and gently placed besides the sink, above a towel. He could be so thoughtful sometimes. “Taehyung, I��“ 

“You’re such a little brat sometimes, do you know that?” he interrupted, eyes following his own movements as his hands circled your body, moving to unclasp your bra. And of course he got it right on the first try. “You came all the way up here just to get fucked, and now you’re worried that people are going to know about it.” 

You stared him down, a smirk already creeping up at the corner of your lips. “How does that make me a brat?” 

He chuckled. “Look at you, trying to play the naive card on me.” Another agile movement of his fingers and your bra was joining your blouse besides the sink. Taehyung sighed tentatively at the image of your exposed breasts, trying to imprint that sight into the back of his mind. “Pretending as if you don’t know exactly what you’re doing. You can drop the act now, baby.”

“I don’t—“

His mouth attacking your breasts was all that you needed to shut up and let him do what he went there to do. Overwhelmed by the sensation, you let out a gasp as his hand squeezed you, playing with your soft boobs as he moaned against your skin. 

“I love it so much.” Taehyung hummed as he sucked on your breasts, moaning at the marvelous sensation of your warm skin against his tongue. You had almost forgotten how much Taehyung ached to play with your boobs; how often he would squeeze them, suck them; find excuses to feel them against his body. Not that you were complaining. “And I love that it’s all for me.” He breathed out before attacking your other nipple. “All of this… all mine.” 

You whimpered at the contact, arching your back in a failed attempt to get closer to him. As much as you knew he was most likely just saying whatever he thought would turn you on — besides, you two had already agreed on a pretty open “relationship” —, Taehyung’s words expanded inside your chest, building a heat that seemed to suffocate you. Even if you knew it was bullshit, you liked to be called his. Ego strokes and all of that. 

“Taehyung…” There was only a thin wooden door separating you two from the outside world, and you couldn’t care less if they heard you calling out his name. That boy really did wonders to your anxiety. 

But he also liked to tease you. 

He moved away from your breasts and you almost — almost — cried out in frustration. 

Taehyung traced his kisses back to your neck, then to your jawline. You were going crazy with all that back and forth. “Baby, I’m not gonna lie, I understand where you’re coming from,” he said. “I like to keep this as a secret too. It’s so hot.” 

You almost forgot how to inhale when he aligned his face with yours, placing a pec on your swollen lips. “Yeah?” You asked, sounding as if you were in a daydream. 

“Yeah,” he agreed, breathless. Even if Taehyung tried his best to look as he was under absolute control, you knew that he couldn’t keep that front for too long. He was clearly turned on, and the hardness pressing against your thigh was all of the proof that you needed. “It’s so great to know that I have one of the sexiest girls on campus just for myself…” His hand trailed up your thighs, adventuring in the lands beneath your skirt. “And no one knows.”

You bit your lower lip, anticipating the contact of his hand against your core. “I thought you were the kind to kiss and tell.”

“Most times,” he mumbled, gifting you with another small pec. “Not with you. I like it like this. Having you when I want, how I want, and only you and I know.”

But you weren’t satisfied with his answer.  His hand did a turn and decided to make a quick stop on your ass, the feeling of skin against skin making your lower body tingle. “What’s so enticing about it?” You asked. 

He smiled. “Ah… many things.”

Your stare didn’t falter. “I’d like an exemple.” 

Instead of answering you straight away, Taehyung decided to take his sweet time. He leaned his head to the side and kissed you feverishly, growing satisfied at the small whimpers and suspires that echoed in between your mouths. His hands were all over you: on your ass, your waist, down your thighs and up your hips, where his eyes could not see. You only had your skirt and your panties on, and it was so frustrating to still feel him fully dressed against you. 

At last, Taehyung pulled away, placing his forehead against yours. As he spoke, you felt the tingle of his hands as they moved towards the hem of your panties. “I like seeing you walk around campus, knowing that you’re so sore from the night before,” he spoke slowly, his voice in a low vibration against your mouth. “And I know you don’t tell any of your friends about it. About how I fucked you so good that you almost cried, and that it’s the next day, and you can barely walk.” 

You hummed, closing your eyes. “What else?”

Much to your dismay, his hands left your underwear again, coming out to pull you closer. “When you send me those audios late at night,” he was breathing out hard then, drowning in those lewd memories. “Playing with your little cunt, crying out my name… shit,” he cursed. “How am I supposed to say no to that? So there I go, out the door, telling my friends that I’m gonna see this crazy hot chick and I’m gonna fuck her brains out…” he hesitated. “And I just get this... rush because they don’t know it’s you.” 

“And how do you know that I like any of it?” You teased. 

Taehyung chuckled at your question. Both of you knew that it was plastered all over your face, but he could keep up that little teasing if you wanted to. “Two reasons,” he said. “First: you do the same to me, or don’t you?” 

“I don’t recall,” you responded, forging innocence. Okay, maybe you did play the naive part a bit much. 

“Oh no? What a terrible memory you have.” He placed a strand of your hair behind your ear, his words hitting your skin in heated, libidinous waves. Taehyung was so close that you could count his eyelashes if you wanted to, his torso squeezed so tight against yours that you wondered how you even managed to breathe in that position. “It was just last week, baby. You called me to your flat after your roommate had left.” One of his hands went back to play with the hem of your underwear, fingertips feeling like lit matches against your skin. “You opened so wide for me, you were so wet already. You got so horny with just the thought of having my cock, isn’t that right?” 

Much to your surprise, your voice came out a lot more steady than you had expected. “Don’t flatter yourself, you don’t know that.”

Taehyung chuckled, placing his warm, swollen lips against the skin of your neck. “I don’t,” he agreed, digits pressing against your clothed clit. You knew he could feel how soaked your panties had become, so there was no reason to keep that up. Regardless, you kind of liked it. “But I do remember how much you wanted me that night, whining and begging me to fill you up with my cock. How many times did I fuck you that night, uh? Four? Five times? And you just had to keep quiet, because your neighbors might have been listening. That was so cute.” 

You sighed, your insides in knots over the tension you were sustaining. You hated him sometimes. Hated how good he was. “I wasn’t counting.” 

“I know, baby.” He swiftly pulled the fabric of your underwear to the side, his long fingers digging into your wet heat. Memories of them fucking you open flooded your mind, sending a shockwave directly through your torso and towards your pussy. “And this right here, baby, is the second reason. Look at this: you’re soaked.” His digits moved, teasing your entrance, and the sound was so lewd that you had to suppress a moan. “You’re always so ready to take me. I love that. You’re so good to me.” 

God, you were about to lose it.

With the force of then thousand warriors, you held back another less-than-graceful sound from escaping your lips. You knew how much Taehyung liked you being loud (something to do with the adrenaline of getting caught, nothing new to see here), and so you had to keep your cool. It wouldn’t be so fun if you just gave him everything he wanted. 

“So quiet all of a sudden.” His nose delicately trailed up your neck, his mouth meeting the angle of your jaw in hot, open kisses. In an attempt to ground yourself, your hands flew to his shoulders, nails digging through his shirt. You could still feel Taehyung’s fingers playing with your wet folds, seeing how much you could take before you were begging for them to enter you. You hated him. Or not. You didn’t know. “I know I leave you speechless, baby, but I wanna hear you too.” 

Strong and steady, his other hand met the curvature of your waist, pressing your body against his. In a mindless reflex, you perked up your ass at the contact, making his fingers slip closer to your soaking entrance. 

“Nothing? Baby, you’re especially irresistible tonight.” Taehyung’s eyes were somewhat dazed, unfocused and hooded. He appeared as if he was two seconds away from fucking you raw against the wall, and you seriously wouldn’t mind. “You know why I called you here?” 

“Because you want to fuck me,” you responded without missing a beat. 

“I do, of course.” He placed his forehead against yours, and you whimpered weakly as two of his fingers finally (finally!) made their way into your heat, stretching you nicely. “That’s it, baby, don’t hold back.”

Instead of answering, another slow, delicious moan dripped like honey from your tongue. Taehyung grunted, satisfied at your responses, and quickened the pace inside your walls; your eyelashes fluttering shut at the ambrosial sensation. He had told you once about how much he liked that part: knowing that you were getting ready for his cock, but already so eager to cum around his fingers. 

Did he tell you that while he fingered you inside his car? Yes. Did anyone else have to know that? Absolutely not. 

“You know what I was doing before I came here?” His question caught you off guard. 

You didn’t even know if you were able to answer for a second, but, happily, the word didn’t have any issue coming out. “What?”

He took a deep, sharp breath, curling his fingers inside you. You pressed your back against the door at the shock of his digits brushing against your sensitive spot, one of your hands flying to your mouth in a way to suppress a particularly loud exclamation of pleasure. “I was listening to Jimin complain about how much he wanted to have you in his bed tonight,” his voice came out in a harsh tone, full of spikes and pointed corners. “Over and over, like a broken record. He can be so explicit when he wants to. It’s unbearable.”

You bit your bottom lip, rolling your hip against his hand. Your body was starting to tingle, the muscles in your legs turning into jello, and you knew that you wouldn’t be able to hold it much longer. As you spoke, you noticed touches of bliss ornamenting your syllables, your words coming out with a bit more difficulty than before. “Oh, so you’re jealous?” You teased.

“Me? Never,” he was quick to respond, groaning at the feeling of your walls clenching around him; his cock throbbing painfully against the fabric of his pants. “I’m just… trying to change your mind.”

“My mind?” You echoed, only half-aware of that conversation. Pleasure was starting to build in alarming rates, and you were starting to lose your trail of thought. “I haven't even decided anything yet.” 

“After I’m done, baby, you won’t need to,”  his voice came out in a profound whisper, sounding like a sweet melody against your ear. “I’m going to fuck you so hard and slow, so deep,” he stressed that word, making your pussy throb around his fingers at the idea, “that you won’t want to have anyone else for the night. Only me.” 

It sounded a bit like possessiveness or jealousy to you, but, honestly, you chose not to pick that conversation for the night. It was probably some kind of acting on his part too. Besides, you weren’t interested in any of Taehyung’s friends, so he didn’t need to worry about Jimin, or anyone else, making a move — especially when he was fingering you so well that you were about to forget your name. 

“And the best part, baby, is that no one will even know it,” he continued, separating his fingers slightly so he could scissor you. Against your best judgement, your knees were getting weaker by the minute, the knot in your abdomen about to untie. “Just you and I. Just the two of us will know how much you begged to be filled up with my cock, how wet you already are just for my fingers.” 

“Taehyung,” you called out, hands tangling themselves in the roots of his silky hair. You moaned out his name again, your voice coming out in such a promiscuous tone that he felt as if he was about to cum on the spot. God, Taehyung loved hearing the effect he had on you. “I’m close.” 

“I know, baby,” he whispered against your ear. His voice was so hoarse, so permeated by desire, that you knew that he was holding back too. His cock was hard and throbbing against your legs, and every minor movement of your thigh against his erection was enough for him to lose his breath for a moment. “But I don’t want you to cum, not yet.” 

Again, he pulled away. 

Taehyung wanted you to complain, to whine about the lack of contact or the warmness of his body — and so, just because you knew that it was his plan, you didn’t do any of that. 

You didn’t say a word as he moved his fingers away from your wetness, his other hand coming down to grope your ass. You didn’t flinch when he looked you deep inside your eyes, guiding his fingers between your lips, watching as your mouth obediently took them in, humming as you sucked your own wetness, never breaking eye contact. 

“Fuck,” he cursed, drowing in the sensation of your warm tongue licking his fingers. You didn’t think that Taehyung was fully aware of the way that his hips had rolled against yours, fighting for relief. “You’re so fucking hot, it’s unreal.”  

And you knew that he said that praise to every poor soul that crossed his path, but it still managed to have some effect on you. Again: you were human, and Taehyung knew what the fuck he was doing. 

But so did you.

Before he could try and do anything else, you pressed your palms against his chest, gently pushing him a few steps away from you. Taehyung followed your lead, watching as you got down to your knees, facing his erection. 

In measured, lackadaisical movements, you pressed your lips against his covered cock, feeling its handness against your mouth. Air got stuck in Taehyung’s throat as he watched you, like a hungry lion, as you undid his pants and pulled them down, gifting you with the sight of his white boxers. 

Just because you knew he liked it, you moaned at the glorious sight of his big, heavy cock already so hard and ready for you; fingers caressing the tip of his member, where a small stain of precum already started to form. Taehyung was so on the edge that he hissed at the contact, one of his hands meeting the back of your head in a mindless impulse. “Don’t tease,” he warned. 

“Oh, so you can and I can’t?” You leaned your head to the side, and planted a kiss on his cock before looking up at him. May the heavens have mercy on you, because you never saw Taehyung so pissed off and turned on at the same time. “I think I could even make you cum like this if I wanted to. I’ve done it before.” 

“Don’t you dare,” he struggled to get out.

“What? You liked when I did that the other times,” you cooled. “Sometimes you didn’t even need my mouth.” 

He closed his eyes, trying to fight the moan that started to climb up his throat. “Stop.” 

“What? You don’t remember?” You asked, placing another kiss on his member, closer to tip that time. “When I let you grind against my ass in the library? You came just by humping me, pants and all.” 

With a cute smile, your hand squeezed his dick, before moving up and down, following its thick outline. Taehyung was dumbfounded, left to watch as your delicate hands worked on his erection with unbearable patience, his eyes glued to every action that you made — the fluttering of your eyelashes, the innocent gazes that you threw his way every time your lips met the cotton of his underwear. If you kept it up for long enough, he was sure he would cum all over his boxers. 

Still, the gods above had heard his prayers, and Taehyung watched as you pulled his underwear down. Without a second of hesitation, you moaned as your tongue licked him all the way from the base to the top, lips enveloping his crown as you sucked on it ever so slightly. 

“Oh, fuck,” he cried out, fingers pulling on your hairstrands. “That’s good, fuck.” 

You hummed, content at his reaction, and pushed him deeper inside your warm mouth, one of your hands holding at the base of his cock. Beneath your other palm, you could feel as the muscles of his thigh tensed up at the sensation. His lips open slighlty, allowing for a long, erotic moan to echo inside the bathroom as you started to set a pace, sucking him slowly, just like you knew it drove him mad. 

“You’re so fucking good at this, baby,” Taehyung groaned, unable to keep his eyes open for much longer. The vision of him was ethereal: head thrown back, mouth slightly agape, eyebrows forming an expression of sheer pleasure and concentration. You cursed your own eyes as they started to water, preventing you from watching him a bit further. “Oh, that’s right, just like that.. you suck me so well, fuck.” 

The pulsating, unsatisfied sensation of need between your thighs only grew, your walls clenching around nothing and your heart beating fast against your chest. You could taste as his precum leaked inside your mouth, his fragmented breaths and whines showing you that Taehyung also wasn’t made of steel. As much as you’d like to see him cum soon, you also needed to be taken care of.

After a particularly hard suck, you pulled your mouth away from his member, and looked up at him. The lack of contact was all that Taehyung needed to open his eyes and stare down at you, surprised at the interruption of his pleasure.

“Taehyung,” you tried your best to make your voice sound as pure and sensual as you could. His eyes widened slightly at the sound — no matter how hard he tried to make it seem like he was annoyed by that saint act of yours, you knew that it drove him insane. “I want you to fuck me now, please.” 

You watched as his face presented a thousand emotions at the same time, and then eventually settled on the cool, controlled dominance you adored so much. Another surge of pleasure ran down your body, much stronger this time, and the feeling of your soaked panties against your pussy was making you go insane with anticipation. 

“I love it when you ask politely.” He placed his hand on your chin, trailing your lower lip with his thumb. “Get up, baby,” he commanded. 

Without an ounce of hesitation, you did as you were told, letting your body be guided by his large hands. 

Taehyung turned you around and leaned you against the sink, positioning himself behind you. “Back to me, ass up,” he said, “Keep it like this, alright?” 

You nodded, unsure that you could say anything else. 

“Good girl.” Taehyung once again held your chin up, making you stare at your own reflection in the mirror for a second before your eyes traveled towards his. God, he was an absolute mess. In the best of ways. “I want you to look at it.”

Any second now, your legs would give out and you would crash down on the floor — or, at least, that’s the sensation you had. It was unbearable to watch as Taehyung took his time removing his shirt; then your skirt and your panties, dripping them down your legs one by one, his mouth so deliciously close to your heat that you felt like you could faint. 

“So pretty,” he mumbled to himself, watching your pussy with desire. “So fucking wet.” 

“I want to feel you, please.” You arched your back, throwing your hips closer to his. 

“Like this, baby?” With a glorious roll of his hips against yours, you felt as his cock moved in between your folds, his head only touching your clit slightly. The sensation alone was enough to make you perk your ass up at him, a motion that wasn’t left unnoticed by his part. 

He smirked at your reaction. “Such a pure little thing, aren’t you?” Taehyung’s hands palmed your ass, moving like snakes towards your waist, where they held you in place. Another roll of his hips and the contact of his dick against your clit made your knees buckle. “You’re so polite, just asking for my cock again and again… You don’t even notice how wet you get thinking about it, grinding against it. Isn’t that so?” 

You had no option but to agree, lowering your head to look at the marble sink beneath you. “Yeah,” your voice came out in a pathetic whine, but you couldn’t even care about it. You just wanted to feel him inside you. “It’s all for you, Taehyung.” 

“Good girl,” he praised, taking one of his hands to guide his cock towards your opening. Expectant, you held your breath, but he didn’t slide in just yet. “Just tell me what you want, come on.” Again, he leaned in and pushed your chin up. “And look at me while you say that.”  

Obediently, you did. Taehyung was a greek god then. Under the pale yellow lights of the bathroom, his lips were swollen and red, the lower one being bit lightly by his teeth; his entire expression permeated by lust as he dove into the sensation of his cock teasing your entrance. He stared at you like you were good enough to eat, his eyes coruscating with so much hunger that you couldn’t even think about anything else but him. No wonder you kept coming back. His entire presence was engulfing every fiber of your being. 

Maybe Kim Taehyung did have a golden dick, after all. 

“I want you to fuck me, Taehyung,” a sentence had never been so clear, so sincere. From the corner of your eye, you could see your own face, desperate and pleading, as you fumbled closer to his member. “Please. I need to feel you inside me.” 

With a hum, he kissed the nape of your neck. “Whatever my girl wants.” 

And, before you could even think about his words, your thoughts were broken as you moaned out his name, feeling as his big cock stretched you, hitting all the right spots. You had missed that sensation so much, of being so full of him, so hypnotized by the movements of his body against yours, that you didn’t even compute the shuddering breath that departed from his mouth, nor the curse that he had let out once he felt the warmness of your walls around his aching member. 

He thought he could lose his last ounces of sanity as he pulled out just enough to leave only his tip in, before throwing his lips against yours and filling you back up. Soon enough, Taehyung was setting a rhythm, unable to control his comments as he kept thrusting inside you. 

“So tight, baby,” he spoke in a whisper, almost as if you weren’t supposed to hear it. His face in the mirror was the most beautiful sight you had ever seen: Taehyung was so lost in pleasure that his features had morphed into an expression of sheer bliss; all of his concentration directed at the movements of your body, the way that your walls held him with so much desire. “You take my cock so well… Shit, you’re making me go crazy.” 

Taehyung’s breath quivered and he leaned his body towards you, fighting for balance. He had one of his hands on your waist, and the other was holding down to the sink, leveling his figure as he started to thrust into you in that different angle — just as slow, hard and deep as he had promised. 

You rolled your head back once he hit the right spot inside you, your moans going up an octave. “Fuck, right there, Taehyung,” you whined, barely aware of the volume of your voice. To hell with it, the music was too loud anyways. “There, right there, don’t stop.” 

“Here?” He groaned, thrusting in the exact place that made you cry out. “That’s it, baby, let it out.” 

And you wanted to prolong that moment for as long as you could, but, truth was, he had played around with you enough that you knew you wouldn’t last much. Even sucking his cock, feeling as he mumbled and trembled under your touches, had been enough to keep you turned on. Again: you were only human, and the paradisiacal feeling of Taehyung’s cock filling you up to the brim, hitting your sweet spot with forceful thrusts, was a bit more than you could endure. 

“Taehyung, I think I’m close,” you told him, feeling as your arms grew weaker beneath you. It was just a matter of time before your legs started shaking too. “I’m gonna cum.”

“Shh, that’s fine, baby.” He moved your hair away from your back, placing a trail of sloppy kisses on your shoulders. “Come on, cum around my cock. I want to feel you.” 

“It’s so big, Taehyung,” you moaned, closing your eyes in defeat. You could tell that your pleasure was already building up too much, too fast. You couldn’t help it: he was stretching you so fantastically that every part of you was on overdrive, the pent-up tension of the entire night culminating in one long, edging orgasm. 

“It’s all yours, baby, all of it,” he told you, guiding you towards your high. God, his voice was so hoarse, so sweet. “Cum for me, okay? And don’t hold back, I want to hear you.” 

Just like that, you came with a loud moan and the calling of his name in a repetitive prayer, walls clenching around him in a way that made him lose his grip on reality. You whimpered at the pleasure, that now was gradually subsiding, and lowered your body against the marble, feeling how cold it was, how different it was from the rest of the bathroom. 

“That’s it, baby, yeah… That was so fucking hot.” Taehyung groaned behind you, picking up the pace of his thrusts. He was moving you so hard that you could feel your hip bones being pressed against the corners of the marble surface, the dirty sound of wetness and skin against skin filling the ambient. “Look at all this… so wet and tight, even after coming so hard.” 

From the way that Taehyung’s movements started to get sloppier, you could tell that he was losing himself in his own sense of pleasure, getting closer to his own climax. “All of this… all for me,” he moaned out, eyes glued to the motion of his cock coming in and out of your dripping center. “You’re so good, baby. Fuck, I could have you like this forever.”

The pounding of his hips against your ass was getting so intense that you could feel tears accumulating at the corners of your eyes, fingers trembling under the weight of overstimulation. Taehyung had fucked you hard before, but you just couldn’t get used to how fantastic it felt. 

“I’m close,” he cried out behind you, his breath coming out in broken, tremulous expirations. “Can I cum on your mouth, baby? I want to see you swallow everything.” 

You nodded, mouth salivating at the thought. 

“Fuck.” He groaned. “That’s my girl.” 

Taehyung pulled away from you and you moved fast, getting back down on your knees as he guided his cock, so red and swollen, against your lips. 

You opened your mouth to accommodate him, taking his member slowly at first, thinking it would be better to adjust to its size. After that part was done — and Taehyung had already turned into a quivering mess above you — you proceeded to move your head, sucking his cock as hard as you could muster. 

“That’s right, suck it,” he moaned, buckling his hips forward. The tip of his cock touched the back of your throat and you gagged, presenting Taehyung with one of the most gorgeous views he had seen all night. “Fuck, yeah— Take everything, baby, come on.” 

You did, of course. You continued to suck Taehyung with a moderate pace — not so slow that it would kill him, but not so fast that it would kill you — and watched as he started to become undone under your touches. First, it were his trembling thighs, then the weakening of his grip on his head. You looked up at him with blurry eyes and watched as his lips fell open, moaning obscenities, and his eyes closed with intense concentration. It was just a matter of time before he—

“F-fuck!” 

Taehyung spilled in your mouth and you struggled to swallow everything, just like he had told you to, whining at the feeling of his cock throbbing and twitching in between your lips. The discomfort between your thighs had resumed, pulsating inside your core in a silent need, but you didn’t think you’d have the stamina to deal with it right then and there. 

You pulled your head away from his cock when he started wincing with sensitivity. With doll-like eyes, you met his hooded ones, glad to see the satisfaction and appreciation that was plastered all across his face. He always looked so good after sex, you realized, and you felt extremely satisfied to know that his fucked-out, blissful expression was all because of you. 

In a gentle motion, Taehyung placed his thumb on your check, cleaning a bit of his cum, and brought it over to your lips. “You missed this bit,” he said. 

You sucked his thumb clean without thinking twice, suddenly aware of how uncomfortable your knees felt. Above you, Taehyung smirked at the sensation of your mouth around his thumb, his other hand coming to place small caresses on your hair. 

After he removed his thumb from your mouth, you got back to your feet. It crossed your mind that your legs might give out eventually, but, thankfully, they seemed a bit more firm than you had anticipated. “Better?” You asked. 

“Perfect.” Taehyung kissed you, sighing against your mouth. He pulled away gradually, his body still moving a bit slow after everything you two had done. “You always are.” 

“Aw, how nice of you.” You smiled at his compliment, walking towards your pile of clothes. The bathroom was starting to get cold, and the afterglow of sex couldn’t keep you warm for much longer. “Always with the compliments.” 

He hummed in agreement, watching your naked body; your fingers holding that red bra he adored so much. “Any chance I could see you again this week?” 

An incredulous laugh ruptured your lips as you clasped your bra behind your back. “We just had sex, and you’re already thinking about the next time?” 

He shrugged. “I like to have a schedule.” 

“I’ll think about it.” Your skirt moved up your legs, all the way up to your waistline. From the corner of your eyes, you could see as Taehyung fumbled with his own pants, which he now cursed for being inside out. Seems like he was only thoughtful when it came to your wardrobe. “It’s not like we usually know when this stuff is going to happen.” 

There was a slight tremble in your fingertips as you reached for your blouse and placed it back on your body, but you decided to ignore it.

“I guess,” he mumbled. 

You stared at your own reflection in the mirror as you started to close your buttons, somewhat amazed by the fact that it didn’t appear like you just had had sex. Yeah, your hair was all over the place, and maybe your neck was a bit too red in a few spots, but nothing that a bit of time wouldn’t fix. Could’ve been worse. 

“Can you pass me some toilet paper?” You asked him, eager to clean the mess between your legs. There was no way in hell you were going to put your panties back on, even if the thought of going commando wasn’t exactly the most welcoming either. 

Taehyung was sitting on the toilet lid, putting his pants back, and simply nodded in agreement before doing so. “I’d like to know, though,” he insisted.

You smiled, taking a cheeky glance at him. “Since when you’re so needy?” 

He groaned. “I’m not needy, shut up” 

“Well… You have my number.” You responded, throwing the paper in the trash after you had finished cleaning yourself up. “Call me whenever you’re feeling like it, and I’ll see what I can do.” 

He pouted, clearly frustrated at the answer. “And what if you can’t make it?”

“Then you have two good hands to help you,” you answered simply, fingers working on adjusting your hair. The sound of his zipper closing echoed inside the cubicle. “Besides.. you can have this as a memory, if you’d like.” 

You threw your red panties at him, watching as his face grew interested at the piece of wet cloth in his hands. Taehyung sighed, tugging his shirt back inside his pants. “You’re killing me,” he complained. 

“Good.” You smiled, turning back at him. “How do I look? Presentable?” 

He examined you for an instant, taking in the details of your form. “It doesn’t look like you just got fucked, if that's what you’re asking.” 

“Great!” You swirled around, giving the mirror a last peek. You were getting suspiciously good at making it seem like you two never happened. “Have a nice night, Taehyung. Maybe wait like five minutes before leaving the bathroom. And don’t get too excited with the panties.” 

Taehyung got up and walked closer to you, your underwear safely guarded in his hands. You were positive he would have fun with it later. “You’re going home already?” He asked. 

“Yeah, you did a good job at making me tired.” The clicking of the lock was a pleasant reminder that no one tried to open the door during that time, so maybe your sexual shenanigans had been overlooked once again. “So don’t worry. I’m in need of a good night of sleep. I’m not spending any time with your horny friends.” 

Taehyung chuckled, leaning closer to you. “I was kind of exaggerating about that Jimin part for dramatic effect, but alright.” He placed a kiss on your forehead. “Good night. Thanks for the panties.” 

You laughed. “You’re welcome.” 

Just like that, you were out the door, and the moments you had shared in that bathroom with Taehyung had been placed inside a capsule. No one noticed you as you walked through the corridor, past the few strangers still around, and down the stairs, where the party had clearly lost its initial olympian proportions. 

Cups and pieces of paper were thrown all over the floor, and you watched as people stumbled around, trying to find some sort of balance against the walls. No matter how many Hoseok Parties you went to, you were always amazed at the way that they were quick to be set ablaze, but equally quick to burn off. It was like premature ejaculation, in the weirdest and saddest of ways. 

Still, you weren’t expecting to see a recognizable face at the bottom of the stairs. 

“Hyejin,” you called, surprised to see your friend around. “Thought you would’ve gone to bed with Hoseok by now.” 

Seeming as dumbfounded as you, she followed your movements as you walked down the terminal steps, finally reaching the first floor of the house. There was a weird shadow of discomfort casted over her features, and you thought it had something to do with Hoseok. “Uh… Not really,”  she told you. “I just want to go home, actually.”

“You and I both.” You placed one of your arms around her shoulder, guiding her towards the front door. “Let’s go, this place has already peaked, anyway.”

She suspired, her lips pouting. “Thanks.” 

A few minutes of silence expanded between the two of you as you walked out of the house and into the front lawn, where a sea of trash had already taken over a few chunks of grass. You didn’t know how or why, but someone had brought an inflatable pool, and there was only one solitary purple dildo swimming in it. What a sad sea creature, you thought, before your attention was pulled back to your friend.

Hyejin switched uncomfortably in your arms, hugging her own body in a way to shield herself from the gelid breeze of the night. You looked at her with care, watching as her face contorted at sight of the street lights, magnifying the odd expression that had taken over her. “Tell me what happened between you two,” you asked tenderly. “You don’t seem too happy about it.” 

Your friend hesitated and, suddenly, you felt bad for pressuring her. At the same time, you were worried that something bad had happened. “Yeah…  so… apparently he thought he was texting a different person,” she told you. You could tell that she was having a hard time speaking. “It was kind of a mess, actually. He said that in front of everyone. I’m glad you weren’t there to see it.” 

Suddenly, you recognized that expression as being pure, unshakable humiliation. That must’ve been an ugly moment, really, since Hyejin wasn’t one to break easily. The booze probably didn’t help her emotional state either. 

 “Hyejin, I’m so sorry. He really is a fucking idiot for treating you like that.” You squeezed her body against yours in an awkward sideways hug. She eased into your touch, shoulders falling under the weight of your comforting words. “That really sucks. We can find a way to kill him, if you want. I’d hide the body and never talk about it again.”  

Even if she chuckled at the idea, you could tell she wasn’t in the mood for jokes. “Yeah… I don’t think I want to talk about that right now.” She cleared her throat, hugging her own body with a bit more force. The car was just a few steps away from the two of you, and you were beyond glad that you had managed to find a spot so close to the house. “Anyways… there’s something else. I went to find you earlier, when it all went down, so we could go home.”

You pressed your lips together, guilt hitting you like a punch in the gut. “Sorry, I was upstairs.” 

“Yeah, I realized that once I didn’t find you,” she continued. Hyejin’s voice was weak, her syllables slightly disconnected. She often spoke like that once intoxication and exhaustion joined in a horrible after-party dance. “I went up and searched around for you, but I… uh…” 

The two of you finally reached the vehicle, and you removed your arm from around her so you could move towards the driver’s side. You frowned at her hesitation, watching her over the roof of the car. “What is it?” You asked. 

“I needed to use the bathroom…” she trailed off. Her tone was almost inaudible. “And I…” 

You opened your purse, squinting your eyes to try and find the car key amidst the dimly-lit street. “And?” 

“The door was locked.” She gawked at you, eyes suddenly growing serious. You didn’t like drunk-Hyejin, with her unstable moods and abrupt expression switches. It was watching a horror movie sometimes. “Because you were in there.” 

Oh, you seriously didn’t want to have that conversation at that moment. 

Finally, you found the key and unlocked the car. The sound was like a gunshot through the night, your pulse starting to pick up the pace. You knew where she was heading towards now, but it’s not like she could be sure that it was you in there. You’d deny until the end of time. 

“What makes you think that it was me?” You questioned, opening the door. 

This time, she didn’t hesitate to respond. “I heard you.”

Oh. Fuck. Fuckfuckfuckfuck— 

Keep your cool. It’s okay. “I don’t know what you are talking about.” 

“You don’t?” She started to raise her voice, clearly pissed off. You two were arriving at stage two of drunk Hyejin: past the sad introspection, and into banshee level. “I had to pee on the disgusting bathroom downstairs because you were fucking someone in there! I had to wait twenty minutes in line! And you lied to me! You told me you didn’t have a dick appointment!” 

“Shhh! Stop yelling!” You asked, exasperated. The night was too cold and the streets were too empty. You just wanted to go home before someone heard you. All that it needed was one half-assed comment from Taehyung about him going to the upstairs bathroom, plus someone interested enough to connect the dots, and your little secret would be up. “I’m sorry for the inconvenience, okay? Now, please, get in the car, you’re super drunk.”

Before Hyejin could protest, which you were sure she would, you sank down on your seat, running away from her judgemental semblance. The thought of just driving off in sheer panic crossed your mind, but you quickly ignored it. You couldn’t leave her alone in that place, especially in the inebriated state she was in. No matter how much you really, really wanted to. 

Your friend followed your lead and sat down on the passenger seat, watching as you closed your door and checked the mirrors, avoiding her gaze with all your might. She sighed. “I don’t understand… Why didn’t you go somewhere else for that? People need to pee, you know? Or, I don’t know, puke… or maybe even—“ 

You threw your purse on the backseat, sighing in exasperation. That conversation was the last thing you needed after that night. “I don’t think it matters right now—“

“It does matter! I could’ve gotten a urinary tract infection.” Hyejin banged the door by her side, and you could tell she simply wasn’t measuring her force right. She groaned, lazily adjusting her body on the seat. “Now, you have to tell me who it was. It’s the minimum you can do.” 

You almost choked on your own saliva.  She really was out of it. “Like I’d ever do something like that.”

Silence grew thick inside the car, falling above you like a blanket. Hyejin looked at you like you had just grown a second head, making sure that she wasn’t drunk enough to imagine you flat-out denying her an information so valuable. To be fair, it wasn’t like you to avoid questions or keep names from her — at least, not so openly. You knew that she wasn’t dumb, and that she could tell that something was up even in her intoxicated state. 

“You’re really not gonna say?” She tried again, still struggling to keep her speech tied together. It was only a matter of time before she calmed down and fell asleep, and so you wouldn’t have to deal with that subject any further. “You almost gave me an UTI, and now you’re not gonna say who you were with? I need to know if it was worth keeping the bathroom all to yourself, because I already told you, someone probably went up there trying to—“ 

“Shit, Hyejin! I get it, you, can stop now.” You clicked your seatbelt with a bit more aggression than necessary. “You’re drunk right now.”

You leaned over her and placed her seatbelt too, since you were pretty sure she wouldn’t be able to do it herself. Not with that poor movement precision. 

“And?” She pressed on as you moved back to your seat. “You’re going to tell me once I’m sober or something?”

You laughed, placing one of your hands on the wheel. “No, of course not.”

“Fine!” She crossed her arms dramatically and looked out of the window, pouting like a child. “I hate you for not saying.” 

“Well, I love you.” You looked at her, your own gaze navigating towards the window. Beyond the fogged glass, the house glowed in the most diverse colors, the sound of the bass reverberating inside your car like a distant pulse. You watched, heart clenching inside of your chest, as Taehyung stepped out of the front door with Jimin, his head hanging low and a smile at the corner of his lips. There was a volume at his front pocket, where you were sure he had tugged in your panties. “But now I think that we should go home and sleep. Let’s keep this conversation on hold.” 

Hyejin, however, wasn’t satisfied. “You know that I’ll find out eventually,” she said, still looking out of the window. “I always do.” 

You chuckled, turning on the engine of the car. On the other side of the street, the two boys took the opposite direction, leaving you two to stare at the open road before you. “Well, I’d love to see you try.”

[angelyuji]

I also love Yan!Spiderman, there will never be enough content for him ! Can I request a headcannon ? Or a blurb, whatever you prefer ? I love the amnesia trope, like the reader having long-term amnesia after an accident or whatever and yan!Spiderman swooping in, saying they have been dating for months... You may get suspicious of how flustered he gets but he knows so much about you, he can't be lying, right ? 😚

17+

cw// stalking, non-consensual picture taking, kind of kidnapping, familial neglect, car accident caused by superheroes, non-consensual kissing, non-consensual touching, forced hugs, lying, manipulation, “gatekeep, gaslight, girlboss” energy, implied murder, peter being a crybaby to guilt trip you, idk peter being gross and pervy and being a liar, toxic relationship (kind of because you’re kinda not aware of the fact that he sucks and he’s lying)

· OMGBESTIE sorry i just absolutely ADORE the amnesia trope in yandere fics GHJKJHGF

· it’s just so perfect *chef’s kiss*

· anyway

· you got into accident that totally not caused by peter…yeah, it was totally definitely the criminal’s fault …

· but i mean, why were you driving in the middle of a villain attack anyway? oh, you had to go to work?...so??? peter didn’t give you the ok?????

· right, so he’s tossing cars and trying to bring justice (or something like that) and he saw you coming, but alas, he's too late

· you see something hurtling towards your car as you stop at a red light. you squint your eyes, “oh. ha, that’s a car…wait”

· peter was only a couple feet away when he sees the truck he threw slam against the hood of your car, crumpling the hood like it’s made of aluminum foil. time moves in slow motion as peter tries to reach you. out of reflex, peter shoots his webs to move you from impact. he can feel himself move, but his mind shuts down. when he regains consciousness, you’re in his arms, passed out, but seemingly unscathed. he feels relief, then fury. peter barely noticed when the paramedics came to move you out of his arms. he turns to the villain, his whole body shaking, and launches himself at the man.

· you end up in the hospital for a brain injury that left you in a coma and peter literally never left your side. he came every day and stayed by your side until visiting hours were over, and came into your room at night as spiderman after patrol.

· the hospital staff saw him so much that they assumed you were both in a relationship, so when you woke up at night during his patrol hours, they called him first.

· they called your parents after…weird, i know

· “how do you feel?”

· “fine, i guess. tired, surprisingly” you chuckle dryly and the doctor smiles.

· “fine is good. what’s the last thing you remember?”

· “…um….i can’t… I don’t-”

· “hey, it’s okay. take your time.” the doctor tries to be reassuring, but you feel panic bubble. what’s going on, why can’t you remember what happened? what’s happening to you? your breathing turns rough and the air feels thicker as you seem to remember less and less of what you should know. all of a sudden, two arms wrap around you and pull you into them.

· “it’s gonna be okay” they mumble into your hair as you cry into their shirt.

· peter and the doctor eventually figured out that you were missing 4 years of your life. the 4 years that you’ve lived in queens, to be exact.

· peter realizes exactly what he has to do when the doctor pulls him and your family aside to explain the situation

· (they had asked him who tf he was and he, in a panic to not be kicked out, said y’all were dating)

· he offers your family a way out, a way to not take the stress of taking care of you, by letting him take care of you

· “i love them. i can’t lose them and i won’t lose them, so please, let me take care of them”

· honestly, your family was lowkey relieved that peter offered to take care of you, not even remembering that you have never mentioned this man in any conversation (who has amnesia now??)

· peter would go into your room and tell you that you’re going home with him

· “what? what about my family?”

· “they’re okay with it. they have a lot going on and, as your boyfriend-”

· “boyfriend? i’ve never seen you before in my life?”

· “no! no, we started dating when you moved to queens!" at your blank stare, he lowers his head slightly and you see tears fall, "i wish you would remember”

· peter will pull out his pictures of you saying stuff like “then how do i have these pictures?? hmm????” and fake crying to make it seem like he was your grieving boyfriend

· he’ll be constantly mentioning the fact that he’s your boyfriend to you and to others (at some point, ur confused on whether he’s trying to convince you or trying to convince himself) “as your boyfriend’ “your boyfriend” “i love being with you and going on dates haha yk since im your bf”

· he’ll make up different stories from places he’s seen you. if he stalked you while you were walking at the park, he’ll say you both went on walks often. if you went on picnics by yourself often, he’ll say you constantly had picnic dates. had a fun day at the arcade? more like, you had fun day at the arcade with peter!

· peter’s smart, he uses these events as a way of tricking your brain into thinking that each memory you recover of these moments are just moments that are missing him, and eventually, he’ll start appearing in memories

· peter would take you to his apartment and absolutely REFUSE to let you leave, he’ll have an excuse ready to make sure you can’t leave your new home

· “the doctor said you shouldn’t move too much”

· he’ll make you sleep in the same bed as him, go on dates with him, hug and kiss him like “you used to do” with the excuse of “the doctor said you should do things that you used to do before the accident to start remembering everything”

· …riiight

· “are you coming to bed?” you lay in his bed, waiting for peter.

· “i-i sorry, yes, I-” peter stumbles on his words as he stands by the bed.

· you sit up in annoyance, “peter, you said we slept together. what’s wrong?”

· peter turns bright red, “no! nothing’s wrong! it’s nothing, i-i’m coming to bed in a sec.” you lay back down and soon you feel him crawl into bed. you turn your back to him, but peter pulls you closer to him and start leaving kisses down your back.

· “what are you doing.” you whisper into the darkness. his small touches feel foreign on your skin and your body itches to move in disgust.

· “i’m helping you sleep. uh-before, i helped you fall sleep like this, maybe this’ll help you remember” peter pushes his head into the crook of your neck and holds you closer, his fingers grazing under your shirt and feeling your stomach.

· you try to move away without panicking, “maybe, we’re moving too fast? i kinda need some spa-” you feel peter freeze.

· “do-do you not love me anymore?” you feel peter’s tears before you hear his sniffles, “i didn’t want to push you, but i just missed you so much and i thought that you were starting to remember how much you love me.” his sniffles turn to sobs and you start feeling guilty. you push your discomfort away and let yourself get pulled into his warmth.

· “no, it's fine. just don’t, you know, cry please.” you press your lips into a thin line and sigh as peter stops sniffling and hums in content.

· he’ll guilt you into doing what he wants with tears and sobs about how he misses “the old you”

· funny, considering the fact that this mf basically made up his entire relationship with you because he’s literally psychotic

· your relationship would be seemingly normal too, except that all of the friends that talked about how they’ve never met peter before your accident went missing…huh, definitely no connection there…

· but by the time they inform you of their concern, it is already months after your accident and peter would have already made you believe that you were dating

· in peter’s mind, you’re everything and more than he imagined, even though you barely know him, he knows you so well that it’s easy for him to make you believe that you’re together.

· peter would tell he’s spiderman once you’ve stopped resisting him to make sure that you won’t search up your accident and see that spiderman was involved

· the only way for you to break from peter’s grip on your mind is for him to accidently confess that he’s lied to you

· and that’ll happen, peter may be good at lying, but during a fight, he might let it slip

· “I TOLD YOU NOT TO TALK TO THEM.”

· “they’re my friends, peter. you can’t stop me from seeing them.” you roll your eyes when peter’s face crumples. “ugh, peter, stop with the guilt-tripping. your fake tears don’t work on me anymore.”

· peter’s face turns cold, “your friends are liars and they’ve been trying to break us up since the accident. all they say when they see me are lies.”

· you keep a straight face, “well, i know it’s a lie, so you don’t have to act like this.”

· “but-but what if you start believing them? what if you realize that you can do better than me? what if you remember everything? what if they make you break up with me? wh-” peter turns to you and sees you frozen in place. he moves towards you and pulls you into a hug, but you stay stiff.

· “what do you mean “remember”?” you whisper and peter’s eyes go wide. silence fills the room as peter says still.

· “well, shit”

-

[mrsbrekkers]

could you do a jesper x reader where the reader is more on the emotionless side and is always lowkey angry at the world and jesper is always happy/flirty?? I love that type of trope sm!!!

first request yEEEEE. i got this during work and practically jumped up and down 1; because i love jesper. 2; i actually didn’t think people who request. 3; because it gave me something to do when i got home lol

i hope this is up to what you were looking for! i didn’t quite have an idea for backstory in terms of your request, so i left that up to interpretation. plus, i haven’t written jesper before +++ this is the first one-shot i’ve written IN AGES

pairings; jesper x reader / kaz x inej + nina x matthias ( mentioned )

reader is non-gender specific because jesper is a bi-con and i want this to be seen as either female, male, non-binary pals, whatever one identifies with!

warnings; like one or two swearwords? guns, the usual soc stuff? and not edited in terms of grammar, etc.

word count; 2026 ( p proud mom here )

one shot under cut!

BOATS WERE MADE TO CREATE LAUGHS

The world was cruel.

Anyone who’d lived long enough in the barrel knew that, and still, somehow, Jesper Fahey managed to be as happy as he was. Whether it be after he’d lost all of his money gambling, or during a job gone wrong? Jesper Fahey never seemed all too affected by the barrel and the shit it’d throw at The Crows. Maybe it was because he was good at hiding his affliction. Maybe he’d become used to it, and simply decided to have a better onlook when it came to such affliction. Whatever it was?

The same couldn’t be said for Y/N.

Becoming used to the affliction wasn’t in the cards for them, but hiding it was. Keeping a stoic face, always observant. There was rarely a smile on their face. Inej had coined the stoic look as ‘The Brekker Stare’. Kaz had started it, but slowly Y/N grew to use it as well. It was easy to be emotionless. It made one more equipped to face danger and problems that arose. Or, that’s what Y/N’s excuse was when they were teased about using ‘The Brekker Stare’.

Missions were always the hardest to keep that stoic look on. Especially when paired with Jesper. It wasn’t that Y/N hated the boy, quite the opposite actually. They admired his ability to stay so joyful in a place such as the barrel. Sometimes they wished it was as easy as Jesper made it seem. Maybe that’s why they’d rather be paired with Nina, but that spot was reserved for Matthias - courtesy of Kaz Brekker and his secret want for them to work out their relationship. Inej was a good choice for a partner, but she worked either alone, or with Kaz. Rarely with anyone outside of those choices. Wylan made a good partner too, but Kaz and his reasons.

That left Jesper and Y/N.

The mission seemed simple enough - sneak into The Emerald Palace to gather information on what Rollin’s next move was. Eavesdropping seemed easy enough for The Crows. Inej was doing what she did best: moved quietly. Wylan posed as a new waiter, his hair tailored by Nina to appear brunette. Nina and Matthais acted as a drunk couple at the gambling table a few away from Jesper and Y/N.

“This is going to go horribly wrong,” Y/N spoke as they’d gone over the plan numerous times in their head. One, how would the Dime Lions not notice who they were? Nina was a good enough tailor, but she wasn’t a phenomenal one. Certainly not Genya Safin phenomenal. She was a heartrender after all. Two, they may not even receive the information they’d need. Three, if they were caught, that information would be useless.

“Oh come on Y/N, don’t be so down about the world. It hasn’t killed us yet,” Jesper responded. To which, Y/N simply gave a glare. Surely it hadn’t killed them, but it’d killed enough people for them to be mad at it.

“It won’t go horribly wrong as long as the two of you don’t bicker like children,” Kaz said with a wave of his cane between the two.

Gambling, a wonderful way to gather information. Whatever Kaz’s reasons for this mission was, Y/N wasn’t going to question it. They’d rather do their job, get their cut, and then return to the Slat. It was easier that way, but Jesper decided it wasn’t easier that way tonight.

“I’m raising, what do you think darling?” Jesper asked, his eyes glancing up at Y/N, who sat on his leg. 

“Raising with a hand like that?” Y/N asked out loud, raising an eyebrow. “You’re asking to be stung, dear.” They were bluffing, but doing a beautiful job so. Jesper had a royal flush - which in terms of luck tonight, was the best he’d had.

“Oh come on darling, it’s a wonderful hand. Money grabber at that!” Jesper said, his lips pouting out. Y/N would never understand how men could fall for such an act, but it seemed they didn’t have brains.

The men around them smirked, amused. They seemed to think they’d won, and with everyone raising and placing their hands down, Jesper chuckled. It was easy to play drunk men, and with Wylan continuously supplying them with alcohol, even easier to gain information.

“Boss is going to kill me,” one of the men murmured, making Y/N’s eyes shoot over in their direction. Their attention seemed taken then, eyes narrowing. Glancing down at Jesper, they nodded in the direction of the man.

“And why would that be?” One of the drunk men across the table asked. It seemed the men would do the work for Jesper and Y/N.

Easier for us, Y/N thought. Indeed it was. Words spilled from the men’s mouths, and before they’d known it, they learned of a job Rollins planned to have lined up. It was going well, until one of the men decided to become handsy with Y/N.

“A pretty one you’ve got here,” he spoke, causing Y/N to scowl. Pretty is not what you’ll be thinking when I break your nose. “Mind if I have a go at them?” The man added his hands finding their place on Y/N’s waist. Before Jesper could step in, Y/N’s leg lifted, the man doubling over at the pain that seared through his groin. 

“Touch me again, I dare you.” The commotion had caused men a part of the Dime Lions to step forward from around the room. Realizing they’d been compromised, Y/N glanced over at Wylan, nodding and then grabbing Jesper’s arm. “Close your eyes,” They said before a flash bomb went off, the room ringing as the two exited the back door, Kaz waiting mere feet away from it.

“Remember what I mentioned about not bickering like children?!” Kaz asked, rolling his eyes. Maybe if you didn’t pair us together, Brekker, we wouldn’t bicker. But Y/N knew better than to say that outloud to their boss. It was asking to be punished in some out of the box, Kaz Brekker way.

“The men got all handsy with Y/N! I must say that was rather attractive back there! Showing them who’s a badass!” Jesper yelled across the commotion as they began to run down the alleys of the barrel, leaving Kaz behind with Inej who’d jumped down as silent as the night. How she did that, Jesper and Y/N would contemplate together.

“This is not the time Jesper!” Y/N yelled, rolling their eyes.

“Oh come on, no flirting with me?!” 

“Jesper, we’re being chased by Dime Lions wanting to murder us, no I’m not going to flirt with you right now!” Then Y/N slipped down one of the alleyways, pulling Jesper’s arm. Coming to the edge of the canal Kaz had prepped with a boat in case this happened, Y/N jumped down into the boat with Jesper.

“Go,” Y/N said to Rotty who had been waiting. Then down the canal they were going. Out of breath and going down the canal, the trio rest in silence for a few moments.

“For a mission gone wrong, I’d say that was pretty successful,” Jesper said, showing the money he’d managed to grab from the table before the two of them had to run.

“Money? That’s what you call successful? It’ll be gone by tomorrow night at the Crow Club, we both know that,” Y/N said, huffing as they became situated on the boat. It was small, but it made do for the three on the boat. Their face held the usual stoic look, but just the smallest bit of anger broke through.

“The Brekker Stare is happening again, but is that . . . is that anger I see?” Jesper teased his face falling into the same look Y/N currently held.

“Jesper, this isn’t funny. We almost just died. Kaz is going to kill us. Are none of the consequences we’re going to experience angering you?” Y/N asked, their stoic face falling into semi panic. They were so going to experience the wrath of Kaz Brekker when they were safe and back at the Slat. Or the Crow Club. Whichever one they were found at first.

“All the information we just gathered? Is worth nothing because Rollins knows we were there. What was the one thing we were all supposed to manage?” Y/N wasn’t sure who they were mad at more. The man at the Emerald Palace was one of the people they were mad at, but also Jesper for always somehow, even after almost dying, being so flirty and happy. They’d never understand it.

“Getting out silently,” Jesper huffed. He knew Y/N was right, but he couldn’t help himself. Having a crush on your mission partner never made things easy. “But come on, you got to see me looking this dashing tonight,” he reminded, winking.

“I’m really beginning to think you don’t care for your life,” Y/N said with a small shake of their head, just the smallest laugh leaving their lips. Guns and all, Jesper still seemed oblivious to the fact that they’d just been shot at and found out by Pekka Rollins.

“Was that a laugh?” Jesper said with wide eyes, smirking.

Dammit. “No, no it wasn’t,” Y/N said, composing them-self.

“Oh yes it was, and it was angelic. You should laugh more. Do less of The Brekker Stare and more of The Y/N Angelic Laugh,” Jesper deemed, smiling like an idiot.

Then they couldn’t hold it in, and Y/N let the laugh completely consume them. “The Y/N Angelic Laugh? You’ve already coined it?”

“Indeed I did, and I will be taking full credit for this one. Inej took The Brekker Stare from me. This one is coined by me, Jesper Fahey, from this day, until the last.” Jesper had spent years trying to make Y/N laugh, and he’d almost deemed it impossible - but he always had his ways, and they finally had worked.

“I think I’ll be asking Inej to recoin it, thank you,” Y/N spoke as they exited the boat, thanking Rotty. They tossed their green outfit off, their usual black attire hidden underneath. Unaware of Jesper behind them, checking them out per usual.

“I think not. Inej wouldn’t believe I even made you laugh. Do you want her to know you can show emotion that isn’t being angry or pessimistic?” Jesper asked, standing from the boat. He loved teasing Y/N. It was among his favorite pastimes.

Y/N simply rolled their eyes, kicking Jesper in the shin. “I’ll have you know that the girls have seen me laugh.”

“Why don’t I believe that for a second?” Jesper asked. Because it isn’t entirely true. But why would Y/N give Jesper that satisfaction? They weren’t sure. Maybe it was because for once, they were experiencing feelings they hadn’t in a while.

“Because, the girls wouldn’t tell you if I had laughed.”

“No, no. Nina tells us everything. She tells us when Matthias checks her out, how Kaz does his little glance at Inej every time we’re about to leave for a mission, about how I stare at you for too long. I think she’d tell me about you laughing,” Jesper declared, making Y/N stop in their tracks.

He was good. They’d give him that. “You stare at me for too long?” Y/N turned their boot skidding along the wet concrete of Ketterdam.

“Oh yes, Nina declares it’s because I find you attractive, which I do, but you already knew that,” Jesper said, shrugging.

“Hmm,” Y/N simply said, their lips quirking for a moment in thought. “Fine, they haven’t heard me laugh,” and that was the only thing Y/N said before turning back to walk towards the Crow Club, leaving Jesper there with a dorkish grin.

As Jesper began to follow, he chuckled. “I made Y/N L/N laugh,” and with a skip and pull of his coat in victory, he declared he’d hear that sound again.

[oatmilkslytherin]

about time (g.weasley)

description: george weasley and fem!reader have been best friends ever since they began attending hogwarts together. after so many years of like turning into love, george feels as if he’s too late to confess his feelings towards his best friend who is now in a loving relationship with adrian pucey. that is, until he finds out adrian’s dirty secret.

pairing: george weasley x fem!reader, slight adrian pucey x fem!reader

warnings: mention of sexual themes

requested: yes / no

taglist: @jud3cardan​ @potatothingsz​ 

a/n: another character i’ve been dying to write for because i’m in love w the weasleys<33 also lowkey in love with adrian pucey sorry <33

you had been a quidditch fan since before you could remember. even before your attendance at hogwarts, your father used to keep you up to date on all the quidditch-related news, players, etc. so when you began attending hogwarts, your love for quidditch had only sky-rocketed. when your best friends joined the gryffindor house team, it doubled if even possible. 

although you never had a knack for playing, you absolutely loved watching your favorite twins causing a commotion up on their brooms. they would always be the ones to try to catch your eyes in the stands as you cheered relentlessly for them, but you couldn’t deny the fact that a certain pair of eyes always made you melt under them.

george weasley. even his name caused you to blush wildly at the mere sound of it. you and george had become best friends during your first year after a prank-gone-wrong in your potions class. although the memory was from long ago, you couldn’t forget his singed eyebrows and lime green hair. you, on the other hand, managed to get away with a lime-green stain on your robes. ever since then, it was history.

you had always thought your relationship with george was strictly platonic. you two spent many nights together planning pranks and distractedly studying for your classes. that was, until one night when fred had retrieved you from the library, out of breath as he ran up to you mumbling about fred’s disheveled and drunken state in the gryffindor common room. 

while you knew the gryffindor house was throwing a party for an end of the year celebration, you decided against attending due to your stress from o.w.l examinations. in the midst of your studying, fred had quickly but silently ran up to you in the library, his own steps slightly haphazard and clumsy as he crouched by your table. he claimed that george had a bit too much to drink, and was refusing to go to bed unless you were there with him. while the request caught you wildly off guard, you agreed and followed fred to the gryffindor common room to coax your best friend to turn in for the night.

while everything had been platonic up to that point, you couldn’t forget the way george clung to you as you walked him to his dorm. his half-lidded gaze and incoherent mumblings made you smile as you eventually reached his room. you were close to turn away until he insistently slurred on you staying with him for the night, to which you reluctantly agreed. since then, you haven’t been able to forget the way he wrapped himself around you under the covers, the way he drunkenly spoke about how much he loved you.

the next day, you began to think it was all either a lie, or he just meant it in the platonic sense. you decided on the latter, as he had been acting completely normal around you like the previous night never happened. 

you chose to never bring it up again in fear of ruining your friendship, but you couldn’t deny how undeniably infatuated you were with your best friend. 

now, you didn’t have time to remember or forget the incident. closely following george’s drunken night in the common room, you had been approached by none other than adrian pucey, the chaser for the slytherin quidditch team. you had always thought pucey was handsome, but more in an admiring-from-afar sort of way. it became much more than that, however, when you two began dating.

although george wouldn’t admit it, the thought of you dating pucey itched at his skin. he couldn’t stand being around you two when you were together, as it took every fibre of his being to not punch adrian into the ground for stealing you away.

you were never his to begin with, but he felt cheated. cheated in the way that he wanted you all to himself, and he would’ve loved the chance to soberly tell you that, but his own nerves and doubts got in the way. only after you and adrian started dating did fred accidentally spill the fact that you had basically been in love with george. george now kicked himself on not jumping on his only opportunity earlier, or what he thought was his only opportunity.

george wandered aimlessly around the quidditch pitch and changing rooms, kicking at the loose rocks and tufts of grass that got in his way. he didn’t want to be near the castle right now, as it only meant that he would have to deal with seeing you and adrian being all lovey-dovey during dinner. 

the thought killed him. he wanted nothing more than to be with you, both in a romantic and best friendship sort of way. that’s what he loved most about you; the way that you were so comfortable being your fully authentic self around him. now, he was reduced to only being your best friend. while he was still glad to be in your life in that sense, he knew deep down he wanted more. 

george stopped his pacing abruptly when he heard a slam come from the slytherin changing rooms. george furrowed his brows slightly at the sound, knowing that no one besides him would be out by the pitch during dinner. as his curiosity peaked, george quietly made his way into the slytherin changing rooms, poking his head through the doors to get a glimpse of the source.

what he saw then made his jaw drop to the floor.

adrian pucey with his trousers half down and a girl who was not you wrapped around his hips and pressed against the wall. adrian’s head snapped towards the door as george poked his head in, his eyes widening as he caught a glimpse. in a panic, he nearly dropped the nameless girl from her position on the wall, scrambling to pull his pants back up as the girl scrambled for her own shirt. 

george was absolutely stunned at the sight. while he had known pucey to be a rather egotistical slytherin, he never thought in a million years he would be a cheater. from what george saw, pucey seemed absolutely enamored by you, always hanging off of your arm and pressing soft kisses anywhere that you allowed. 

but this, definitely was not that.

“you’re a dead man, pucey,” george spat, shaking his head slightly before retreating from the slytherin changing rooms. adrian stuttered as he tried to think of some excuse, fumbling over his own feet as he paced after george, who was already heading back to the castle. 

“it’s not what it looks like, weasley. please don’t tell y/n,” adrian pleaded, running his hands through his hair in exasperation. george had only scoffed, not even bothering to turn to face adrian in fear that he would only punch him, both for the fact that he had cheated on the girl he loved, as well as the fact that he took her from him in the first place.

“right, like i’m not going to tell my best friend you’re shagging someone else during dinner. tough luck, buddy,” george laughed lightly in attempt to suppress his anger towards the situation. without another word, george paced fervently back into the castle with only one thing on his mind: you.

-

word got around hogwarts fast. most people shunned adrian for doing something so harsh to someone like you, someone who wouldn’t even dare hurt a fly. others thought it was typical of him to do something so vile given his egotistical nature. you, on the other hand, were entirely heartbroken and shattered by the news.

thankfully, george was the one to tell you. he told you how he found them in the slytherin changing rooms by the pitch, and how he pleaded him not to tell you. you thanked him for being honest, but it didn’t change the fact that your now ex-boyfriend was cheating on you for merlin knows how long. 

adrian had tried to apologize to you and mend what he broke. you were not having any of it, though. 

it had been a week since george told you the gut-wrenching news. you figured the entire situation was over and done with since adrian had not even attempted to make amends. you were proved wrong, however, when a sharp knock elicited from your dorm room door. you reluctantly pried it open, your eyes meeting none other than adrian himself, his own cheeks slightly flushed and stained with tears. looking at him, you thought you would burst into tears. you only allowed yourself to remain emotionless and cold as he stood in front of you.

“please, y/n. it was a mistake. i love YOU, and only you,” adrian pleaded, tears welling up in his eyes as he croaked out his cries. you only shook your head, scoffing at his attempts to fix his horrid mistake.

“if you truly loved me, you wouldn’t have done it. we’re done, pucey, end of the story,” you ruthlessly spat at him, anger overcoming your entirety as you spoke. before he could get another word in, you muttered another short ‘no’ followed by lesser kind words before you slammed the door in his face. 

less than a minute later, another knock sounded from your door, making you groan in frustration. you pried yourself from the comfort of your bed once more, stomping over to the door before wrenching it open.

“i told you, pucey. i’m not getting back-” you cut your sentence short as your gaze met the figure’s in front of you, who was most definitely not adrian.

george stood with his eyes wide at your slight outburst, a small grin tugging at his lips despite your frustration.

“remind me to never cross you,” george spoke lightheartedly. your hardened gaze softened as you stepped to the side, welcoming george into your dorm. you shut the door softly behind him as he sat at the edge of your bed.

“i’m sorry, adrian was just here, i thought he came back for some forsaken reason,” you grumbled, letting yourself slouch back onto your bed next to george. george only gave you a soft, sympathetic smile, turning to face you.

“how are you feeling?” george asked as he tucked a stray strand of hair behind your ear. it was the smallest of affections, but it made you blush uncontrollably. you tried to suppress it by averting your attention to the space in between you and him.

“fine, i suppose. i cried it all out, now i’m just angry, i think,” you spoke truthfully. in the past two days of your heartbreak, you had grown to realize that the thought of adrian cheating on you hurt, of course, but you didn’t want to waste tears on someone who didn’t appreciate you enough to begin with. the more you thought about it, the more you realized that adrian’s love language was all for show. on paper, he appeared like an absolute gentleman who could do no harm. behind closed doors, however, it was like he didn’t care if you were there or not. 

in your opinion, it all seemed like an unnecessary, grotesque publicity stunt. the only thing adrian didn’t realize, though, was that there was no one who cared about him enough to watch. 

“i’m sorry, y/n. you deserve better,” george spoke, his hand reaching to grab yours in his, grazing his thumb lightly over the back of your hand. shivers shot throughout your spine at his touch, the heat rising back to your cheeks as you suppressed the soft smile pulling at your lips. 

besides your sudden realization that adrian had no sustenance in a relationship, you also couldn’t help but wonder if you only said ‘yes’ to him because you wanted to get your mind off of someone else. while you admitted that it wasn’t fair of you to write your relationship with adrian off as you just using him to get over your unrequited love of george, you knew that deep down you knew it was never meant to last. 

now, as george sat side-by-side with you, your hand in his as he traced indefinable figured on the back of your hand, you realized that all you wanted all along was him. 

you glanced up at george quickly before settling your gaze back on the bedding, a soft smile stringing along your lips.

“yeah? like who?” you asked, laughing slightly at your own question. george smirked as his other hand reached up, two of his fingers tucking themselves under your chin and pulling your face up to look him in the eyes. your body was coursing with nerves and excitement, your heart beating rapidly as you had just taken note of the close proximity between you two. 

“i, for one, would never cheat on you,” george said playfully, a red hue glazing his features as he smiled at you. you couldn’t help but smile back at him as you stared deeply into his brown eyes.

“well, i suppose that would apply if we were dating, but we’re not,” you spoke equally as playfully. george let out a light laugh as he inched his face closer to yours, your noses grazing against one another’s. your heart beat increased rapidly as you felt his warm breath against your lips, your own breath hitching at his closeness.

“we could be. and i could tell you over and over again how wonderful and worth it you are,” george said, his voice barely above a whisper. you bit down on your lower lip lightly as your mind raced with the idea of being with the one person you haven’t been able to get your mind off of for who knows how long.

“i suppose we could, then,” you breathlessly replied. george smiled at your flustered response, finally closing the gap between the two of you and pressing his lips against yours. 

you immediately melted into the kiss, your arms coming up to wrap around his neck as you tangled one of your hands in his soft hair. george immediately responded to your actions by settling his hands on your waist, pulling you closer into him until your legs draped over his lap. 

your lips met his with enraged passion, smiles and laughter spilling from both of your mouths as your lips met over and over again in pure ecstasy. in a slight fit of laughter, you both pulled away, breathless and eyes sparkling with excitement. you and george still remained tangled together, looking into each other’s eyes as you smiled widely. 

george pressed a few more sweet kisses to multiple plots on your face, nearly assaulting you with his lips on your skin. you couldn’t help but throw your head back in laughter, your head spinning at the thought of finally being able to kiss your best friend. george couldn’t suppress his own smiles and laughs, leaning down to press a final kiss to your lips.

“merlin, you don’t know how long i’ve wanted to do that.”

[jadedxrealityw]

-Rush- Draco Malfoy x Female Reader

♡~🐍~♡

  Summary: After a failed relationship you and Draco lost contact only to be reconnected when you take a job at the Ministry Of Magic. Emotions begin to resurface as you both realize that even after all the time that has passed you still both are deeply in love with each other

  Kody: The song this image is based off of. Lewis Capaldi - Rush ft. Jessie Reyez. I also changed the backstory for a couple of characters, mostly about what happened after the wizarding war.  

  Year: out of school

  House: Gryffindor (out of school)

  Possible Triggers/Warnings: fat angst, cursing, lowkey toxic Draco

  ♡~🐍~♡

   high school sweethearts, that was what you were. What you used to be.

   it was a normal day when Draco said he wanted to end things, going on a whole rant about how you weren’t safe with him and you deserved so much more than what a death eater could bring you. Despite all of your reassurances that you would take the risk his mind was made up.

   his parents were pressuring him to give you up. His father repeating that no son of his would date some Gryffindor half blood, but you were much more than that to him. You shared his passions and interests, listened to him when he needed a ear to talk off about Alchemy or offered your shoulder to cry on.

   it was the one thing he stood his ground for. You. One night while he was quietly, but with haste packing clothes into a small trunk because he was planning on apparating to your house and run away with you his aunt Bellatrix had caught him in the act.

   she, in a very threatening tone told her nephew that the dark lord knew of his little Gryffindor girlfriend and if he wanted to see you unharmed he would be a good boy and listen to orders when he’s given them. His whole world came crashing down. He could take the chance and run with you anyway. He really wanted to.

   but then you would never live a comfortable life. Being on the run constantly was not what he planned when he gave you a silver ring when you were both 15 with a promise he would replace it with a wedding band in the future. Now he would never get to see you walk down the aisle. 

   so he distanced himself from you as much as he could until the breakup, so it wouldn’t hurt as much. It still did.

    ‘The space between where our ends meet, Has grown too much for me to block it out’

   you left his dorm that day in tears. His body almost leaped forward to chase after you, but his mind knew better. If losing you meant he could protect you from the dangers his life brought as a Malfoy, then by all means. He had to let you go. Doesn’t mean it was easy.

   he never really saw you again after that. He chalked it up to his mind blocking you out if you ever were in his line of sight, like some sort of defense his brain put up to avoid any more hurt. Once the ‘final battle’ came around he decided that he wouldn’t let his father control his life anymore.

   he aided the golden trio by tossing his wand to Harry once he fell out of Hagrid’s arms and with that it was over instantly. His mother and him were charged for war crimes, but Hermione and Harry ended up speaking on their behalves and all charges were dropped.

   his father was sent to Azkaban for the rest of his days and for once Draco felt at peace with his father being so far away, no longer having the ability to control him. Harry almost immediately got a job at the ‘Ministry Of Magic’ as well as Hermione. 

   after a few months Harry had talked Draco up enough to his superiors to get him a position in the  ‘Department of Magical Law Enforcement’ as a Auror. He felt strange working with Harry Potter after all the years of bullying, but they got along really well when they cooperated.

    ♡~🐍~♡

   1 year later

   “Hey, can we talk to you for a bit?” Draco looks up from his papers that lied on his desk. Hermione Granger and Harry Potter stood at the entrance of his office, looking visibly uncomfortable. He had a feeling this wouldn’t be a pleasant conversation.

   he set the pen down on the desk before gesturing to the seats in front of said desk. Hermione put on a sweet smile as she took a seat, Harry following. “So i’m sure you heard our department is hiring another Auror since were shoftstafed” Draco nods slowly. He actually heard about it yesterday before he left.

   “Yeah so, we overheard a conversation this morning about who it was and we wanted o tell you in advance” Harry explained. Draco’s brow went up in slight confusion. Warn him? What in hell did that mean? “Warn me” he repeated and Hermione nods.

   a sympathetic smile played on her soft complexion. “It’s Y/n. Y/n L/n” Draco’s body tensed up instantly. Of course the universe would punish him like this. Waving the love of his life in his face after he broke her heart. How spiteful. “Oh” he simply said, before leaning back into his chair. 

   all business professionalism drained from his body in an instant “Fuck” he cursed under his breath “You still care about her, don’t you?” Hermione questioned. He just nodded before letting out a deep sigh and standing up from his chair “I’m quitting”

   both ex Gryffindors shot up from there seats “You can’t quit Draco, that’s a highly irrational reaction!” Hermione sputters as he collects his coat from the back of his black swivel chair. “You wouldn’t understand, Granger” he slipped his arms through both sleeves.

    “Draco!-” Harry started, but didn’t get another word in as Draco opened his office door. As soon as the door swung open he felt a head collide with his chest. He could practically hear their heartbeat race in embarrassment “Oh Merlin, i apologize!” the voice. That voice laughed nervously. 

   ‘I miss the tone of your heartbeat. It's such a warming and familiar sound’

   the person backed away and he felt as if he could collapse right then and there. “Draco?” you said. ‘No, please don’t say my name’ he thought. A smile grew on your face “What a funny coincidence. seeing you here. How’ve you been?”

   his eyes mapped your body, not in a sexual way. Just noting the small changes that occured over a year and a half. You kept your hair the same length, as well as your taste in clothing. Your face was a bit more matured, but still held it’s natural beauty.

   the way you spoke to him made his heart twinge. It was so friendly. Of course it was friendly, but he still hated it. “I’ve been quite alright. You?” he questions. “I’m great, couldn’t be better really.” you shrug your shoulders. His heart tugged violently.

   better. Couldn’t be better. In his mind when the word better came up he imagined being married to you already and living a comfortable, wealthy life. But no, he was here. He forced a half smile on his face “That’s good to hear. Now i must get going. I hope you're finding the power. To help you make it through the darker days”

   he walked past her and as soon as he was out of sight, sped walked to the nearest bathrooms. He locked the door before leaning against it. He slowly slid down until he sat down on the tile floor. It was gross, but he didn’t care at the moment.

   how was he going to work here with you around. It felt as if the air was being violently sucked from his lungs. Was this what Granger called a panic attack? or was his body finally giving up on him. He would be perfectly fine with whatever option at this stage.

   as he stared up at the ceiling, a bitter laugh left his throat “For now, I wait by the hour. If you wanna take somebody's breath away”

    ♡~🐍~♡

   It had been two weeks and Draco felt as if he was going to implode. You were so happy and cheerful and- and- joyful. he just couldn’t understand how you weren’t as broken up as he was or maybe he wanted someone to share his pain. How pathetic was that?

   now here he was. At some boring gala the Ministry was holding. Something about celebrating a new generation or along those lines. Draco couldn’t be bothered to care about details. He took another sip of wine from his glass hoping to get buzzed enough to fly through this boring affair.

   he looks up to see multiple pairs of eyes on him. Wait- not him. Behind him. He slowly turns around as it met with the most breathtaking sight he could ever see. You strolled through the entrance wearing a no strap long lace dress. He swore his heart skipped a couple beats.

   you looked like a princess ready to be whisked away, but you weren’t his to whisk anymore were you? Draco’s jaw locked in place before he looked back down at the wine in his hand. He places it down on a nearby table. “Merlin, you look absolutely stunning Ms. L/n!”

   Granger. “Are you alright?” a male voice asked. Potter. If Weasley showed up, he was going to have an aneurysm on the spot. Draco simply exhaled deeply “I suppose so. I don’t think my mind is processing the fact the she isn’t mine anymore though. So there’s that”

   Harry looked at Draco, studying his facial expressions. It was strange to see him so emotional “If you don’t mind me asking, how long were you two together?” he was treading on thin ice, he knew that. “Long enough for it to hurt this bad”

    ♡~🐍~♡

   and with that. Draco walked away from the chosen one and spent a good twenty minutes talking to random superiors and wealthy couples. It was only when he came from the bathroom he heard your voice for the first time that night.

   “Oh thank you!” you spoke in a enthusiastic voice. Draco stopped mid step and leaned against the wall. Now he was eavesdropping? How pathetic of him. “So Y/n, we heard you used to date Draco Malfoy. Is that true?” a unfamiliar voice asked.

   he inhaled sharply. “Um yes, yes i did” you spoke. You sounded uncomfortable with that question. How dare they pry on your love life? They had no right “So what was he like? Did he cheat on you? Was he a bad boyfriend? I bet he was” his fist clenched at his side.

   Draco wasn’t the nicest person. He knew that, but he showed you as much love and affection his body could produce. He loved you! Hell, he still loved you. You seem to sputter “Uh-” he couldn’t listen to this. He walked out of the small hallway, surprising you and the unfamiliar coworker.

   he needed some fresh air. Now. He pushes through a couple of people with a cold stare. He walks down a couple steps of stairs and hes out the front doors. The cold crisp air hits his face and he felt as if he could breathe again. He reaches up and slicks his platinum hair back.

   a repeated clicking noise could be heard behind him, getting closer. Shoes. No. Heels actually. “Draco” you spoke. He turns around quickly and watches as you step off the concrete and into the grass, holding your dress up from the ground.

   why did he feel so angry? Could it be because you didn’t deny his claims? or something else? “Go away L/n” he spoke harshly. He could see your face turn to one of confusion before a stern look took over “No, your clearly upset so i’m not leaving” 

   still so stubborn. “Are you upset because they asked me about us? If you don’t want anyone to know i promise i won’t tell anyone. I wouldn’t want to ruin your reputation” you said, which only angered him more. How could you be so stupid? 

   “I don’t give a damn if anyone knows about us! You didn’t deny it Y/n! They said such horrible things about me and you just stood there like they were right! Are you fucking serious?! I loved you with everything i had and you act like as if i was the monster!” Draco’s voice boomed, you look positively frightened.

   until you didn’t Then you looked angry “You broke up with me you stupid git! You left me alone and scared while the whole war was going on! So yeah Draco i’m fucking bitter! Screw you! What happened, you were so accepting of me when we first saw each other. You hoped i was well!”

   you were right, he knew that, but he wasn’t done yelling. All of this thought were just rolling off of him in the worst way. You looked disappointed in him. It reminded him of the last time he spoke to you at Hogwarts, but with less crying and more anger.

   “I hoped?! You want to know what i hope!?  I hope you're lonely, hope you're lost 'cause I've been. I'd hate to think you're better off without me  I know we tried to hold on. But where do you go. When love, it just ain't enough?” he spoke, anger leaving him and being replaced with dread and sorrow.

   but he wasn’t done. “Now does it kill you when you think about me? Were you as close to giving up as I've been? I know we kept losing touch. Got lost in the rush...” he sighed deeply, trailing off at the end of his sentence. All his worst thoughts had spilled out of him like a tidal wave.

   you looked shocked and hurt? Maybe he was reading your expression wrong. He couldn’t bare to look at your face. Gulping, he adjusted his tie and turned away to walk off in shame “I pray you don't hurt too much” he chose as his parting words.

   “I don't come close to an angel”

   he stopped. A shuffling sound of fabric heard as you made your way in front of him, jabbing a finger at his chest “You ain't never been no kind of saint” you narrowed your E/c eyes at him. He looked down at you in shame. You removed your finger and stepped back once.

   a bitter laugh forced its way out of you. “But when we both came together. Hell to heaven, you were my escape. But fires don't burn forever and all these ashes crumble when we touch. We danced to death in the fire. What can we do now that the music's done, my love?” 

   his grey eyes went wide. My love? A small feeling of hope bloomed within his chest. You did still care about him. He was your only love and would always be, but you had both been forced apart. Draco was foolish for thinking you had ever lost feelings for the Malfoy.

   now to give him a taste of his own medicine. “I hope you're lonely, hope you're lost 'cause I've been. I'd hate to think you're better off without me. I know we tried to hold on. But where do you go, When love, it just ain't enough? Now, does it kill you when you think about me?”

   you threw your hands up in the air. He could spot tears in your eyes, making him start to choke up as well. That was always his weakness, you crying. “Were you as close to giving up as I've been? I know we kept losing touch. Got lost in the rush. I pray you don't hurt too much” you look down.

   ‘Well, we had it all and we let it fall, But I hope you find whatever you were looking for’

   Draco stepped into you and reaches down to grab your hand “Y/n. During the war i packed a bag in the middle of the night. I was ready to leave my family and run away with you. I wanted nothing more then to pend the rest of my life with you” his thumb caressed the skin of your hand.

   you look up from your heels and met his gaze with teary eyes “Why didn’t you?” you spoke. He smiled sadly, using his other hand to cup your cheek. “My aunt. Bellatrix caught me. The dark lord had found out about you somehow and if i wanted to keep you safe i had to let you go.”

   “The day i broke up with you haunts me in my nightmares. I wanted so badly to reach out and grab you, but love- Y/n you weren’t safe with me.” tears finally escaped his eyes, running down his pale face. You used your hand to hit his chest “I told you i didn’t care Draco”

   he nods, sniffling “I know darling, i should have stuck by your side no matter what, but even the thought of any harm coming to you was to much for me to bare” he let go of your hand. Now he was cradling your face. “I feel as though i am too late” 

   you reach into the top part of your dress and pull out the hidden part of a silver necklace you wore. The silver ring he gave you was at the end of the chain. He felt his heart explode. “You kept it? after all this time. Why?” he asked. You roll your eyes “because i still love you, you foolish boy!”

   Draco was at a loss of words. Unable to speak, he grabbed your face and your lips collided with his in a passionate kiss. It was very sloppy, but showed how much you both missed each other. It made up the amount of time that had passed since you felt each other.

   your the first to pull away from the heated exchange “You better not leave me again Draco” you spoke in a stern tone which made him smile “I wouldn’t dream of it my love. Now, let’s get out of here. There is so much more i want to do with you” his tone became playful as a smirk played on his face.

   your face flushes slightly, but you nod slowly. He holds onto you as you both apparate away to merlin knows where. High school sweethearts, that was what you were. What you used to be. What you got to be again.

    ♡~🐍~♡

   Kody: i- i cried writing this. What a pussy am i right. By the way my inbox is like being a wack ass hoe and not telling me when i get messages so like sorry if you’ve requested something and it hasn’t been posted. (I was also in a depressed state for a bit but whatevs) Anyways, peace!

[demetriandelibinaryboyfriends]

Any hc for (non)binary brothers

You mean like...headcanons for their relationship/Demetri and Eli in general? Sure, I’ll take a stab at this! I have a bunch of miscellaneous headcanons for them anyways and have been looking for a place to put them, may as well post them here.

Fair warning that this is a bit of a disorganized mishmash of stuff I’ve thought up for them myself, headcanons I’ve seen others in the fandom make for them, and tropes that I’ve seen in fanfic that I really liked, so I kinda stole them to add to my own personal headcanon XD I may not be able to source all of them if asked...some of them I’m like “I genuinely don’t remember where I saw that, but I HELLA liked it” lol

~Demetri is like...RIDICULOUSLY good at coding. Eli is good at it too, but Demetri basically singlehandedly carried that coding competition they won. It was really more of a 70-30 effort, but Demetri consistently gives Eli 50% of the credit to try and help him feel good about himself and his capabilities. Demetri knows he did a bit more work than Eli, but he’s never once brought it up and he doesn’t plan to.

~Demetri looooooves cats. Like...the pretentiousness? The heightened sense of self-importance? The way they’re kinda misunderstood and often disliked because they can be mean, and don’t always show affection in the way people expect? The general air of annoyance and disdain they give off??? Demetri’s just like “yep, this is my animal right here.” XD Demetri doesn’t DISLIKE dogs, but he finds they can be a bit much sometimes, and likes that cats do their own thing a lot of the time.

~After getting the Hawk moniker, Eli lowkey got SUPER into hawks and birds of prey in general. Like he started watching documentaries on them and everything, and gushing to Demetri about how badass he thought they were. It even kinda verges into special interest territory (since Hawk/Eli is canonically probably autistic), although it’s not as all-consuming as some of his other ones. Back when he and Demetri are still on good terms, in the early days of “Hawk,” Eli rambles to Demetri about hawks and other “badass” birds a LOT when they’re hanging out. Eli only does this when he’s alone with Demetri because he’s a little scared to show THAT level of enthusiasm to anyone else, considering he’s trying to be a “tough guy” now. Demetri he still feels he can essentially be all of himself with, though. Demetri finds this new raptor obsession kind of hilarious but also kind of endearing.

~Demetri has a single mom who is lowkey overprotective and ends up coddling and sheltering him a lot. Demetri’s dad left when he was little, and his mom can be a bit overbearing because Dem is all she has left of his dad, in a sense. Because of this, Demetri definitely did NOT tell his mom Eli was the one who broke his arm. He said it was “some goon” from Cobra Kai, and said Eli wasn’t even there among the group that day. He knew if his mom knew Eli broke his arm, she would NEVER let Eli near him again, and would probably get a restraining order and possibly press charges. And Demetri just...REFUSES to give up on Eli, even after everything. He figures Kreese’s brainwashing and Kyler being in Cobra Kai are already putting Eli through a special kind of hell, and he wants to protect him from having even MORE things to deal with--in this case, the wrath of Demetri’s mom. And she never finds out Eli broke his arm--Demetri takes it to the grave.

~A little while after the Christmas party, Demetri and Eli resume their weekly sleepovers and try to make up for lost time. They decide not to pull out Eli’s Waterbed from storage, considering they both have pretty unpleasant associations with the waterbed after the incident at Moon’s party. They end up just sharing Demetri’s bed, like they used to when they were little and it wasn’t “weird” yet for two boys to sleep in the same bed. Maybe it’s weird now, but they figure as long as Demetri’s mom doesn’t blab to their friends or something that they’re sharing a bed, then it’s cool. Neither has any issue at all with sharing a bed, although they caaaaaan’t quite put their finger on why that is XD

~Eli actually gets nightmares about the laser tag arm incident more often than Demetri does. The fight will play out in a thousand different ways, but it always ends the same--with Eli pinning Demetri down and snapping his arm. Worse, sometimes he’ll have dreams that he’s beating up Brucks again, and then Brucks will slowly morph into Demetri, but Eli won’t be able to stop punching. He frequently wakes up panicking and screaming and crying during his and Demetri’s sleepovers, and Demetri just holds him and sooths him and wipes his tears off and reassures him that he knows Eli’s never going to hurt him again. 

~I actually imagine it’s on a night like one of these that they first get together--Eli wakes up from another nightmare, and Demetri is just hugging him really close and trying to reassure him, and at some point, Demetri just...impulsively leans in and kisses him. They both get super flustered for a second, and then Eli leans in and kisses Demetri super fiercely and before they know it, they’re making out like there’s no tomorrow. When they have to stop for breath, they admit they’ve always liked each other and just weren’t really sure how to say it. They spoon for the rest of the night, and are pretty much officially dating after that, although they’re kinda anxious about what people will think, so they keep it on the DL at first.

~Demetri has bad dreams too, but his are usually current--e.g. Eli reveals it was All An Act and he’s been spying for Cobra Kai, and doesn’t actually give a shit about Demetri. When Demetri wakes up from these at their sleepovers, he often can’t help but shake Eli awake, and rattle off a bunch of paranoid questions--”You actually like me, right? You actually wanted to be friends again, right? You don’t think I’m annoying? You don’t secretly hate me, after everything?” And this always kind of alarms Eli at first, because of how...out-of-character it is for Demetri to be that self-conscious about what people think about him, and for him to actally...well...care if people think he’s annoying XD But after a little bit Eli just puts his hand on Demetri’s shoulders and says “Demetri, I promise I want you back in my life.” And this is usually enough to calm Demetri down, because he knows it’s genuine, just like Eli’s apology at the Christmas party was.

~Eli is really, really terrified of hurting Demetri again. Sometimes Eli gets panic attacks when he and Demetri are sparring and he hits Demetri a little too hard. Demetri’s kind of come up with a “signal” for Daniel to indicate he and Eli need to take a break. Once Daniel figures out the situation, he’s more than happy to oblige. Demetri always helps Eli through his panic attacks and reassures him that he trusts him with his life now, no matter what happened before. 

~When Johnny finds out about this, he’s actually...way more understanding than anyone expects him to be, because Kreese traumatized him when he was young, too. He just kind of sighs like “Yeah, Kreese made me do some fucked up shit too, back in the day. He’s a bastard like that. You take a 10 whenever the hell you need, Hawk.” And honestly? Demetri lowkey loves Johnny for this. This may be the turning point that finally causes Demetri to view Johnny Lawrence with something other than mild to moderate disdain XD

~Demetri often makes a point of kissing Eli’s scar and telling him he thinks it’s beautiful. Hella corny, I know, but god knows Eli needs it. He kisses it in front of their friends, too, as kind of a way to reassure Eli “hey, I’m proud to be with you in your entirety, and I’m not at all ashamed of that aspect of you, even if you still are.” Eli definitely appreciates this, but he pretends he’s embarrassed by it and will often fall into a blushing, flustered mess when Demetri kisses his scar XD

I think that’s all I’ve got for now!!! I’ll post more later if I think of them!!!

[kamilah-the-bloodqueen]

I got a big fat burst of creativity after today’s FA chapter so I wrote this during my physics lecture. I apologize because I actually lowkey hate how I’ve written this but I also love the concept of it. It’s basically what happens after today’s FA chapter if that’s a good enough preface for everyone. 

Pairing: f!Blaine x MC (Kennedy Monroe)

Word Count: 2410 

Tags: @samanthadalton @cloud9in @shows-simp-card @alleycat97 @veenast @maskedalienfreak (If you’d like to be added/removed or tagged for specific pairings please let me know) 

“I’m so sorry, but...we need to talk.” Evelyn’s frown shifted Kennedy’s mood from relaxed to concerned as Evelyn stepped into the room, closing the door behind her as she turned to face Kennedy. 

“Evelyn, what’s...what’s going on?” Kennedy’s heart sped up, her palms growing sweaty as Evelyn bit her lower lip - the silence between them stressing Kennedy out even more. 

“I...I’m…” Evelyn’s eyes welled with tears as Kennedy moved to hug Evelyn, but she pushed Kennedy back. “I can’t do this.” 

Kennedy felt her stomach drop, those four words bringing Kennedy's worst fear to reality, Evelyn couldn’t keep up the fake dating, the scandal would continue and eventually everyone would know it was Blane Hayes of Ardona on that magazine cover with her and who knows what kind of trouble Blaine would get into. 

“Evelyn…I...please” Kennedy knew that she had to stop Evelyn from walking out, or to plead with her to continue for the duration of the ski trip at the very least. 

“I can’t pretend that this is just a cover-up. I can’t be in a fake relationship with you when deep down I want it to be a real one, I wanted your kisses to mean something and it weighs heavy on my heart knowing it’s not real, that it’s just an act between you and I…” Evelyn took a deep breath, her composure had just crumbled to pieces and Kennedy didn’t know how to respond. Kennedy watched as Evelyn slouched herself on the bed, her shoulders falling and her head tilted down - she looked so unlike herself - Kennedy never could have imagined Evelyn like this, and she didn’t want to. 

“Evelyn I...I thought this was just for Ithanstan and exposure…” Kennedy recalled their dinner date, where Evelyn had specifically given her reasoning for volunteering to carry the fake romance with Kennedy. 

“I...it was...that’s all it was supposed to be but I couldn’t help the feelings that came about,” Evelyn slowly tilted her head up, her eyes filled with exhaustion and Kennedy could feel her pain as she took a seat beside her, placing a reassuring hand on her shoulder, “and when Dionne had us set up that date...I thought it wouldn’t matter to me...but watching you leave to sneak off with Blaine...that hurt.” Evelyn’s watery eyes met Kennedy and she felt her stomach drop to the floor. 

Blaine. Evelyn knew it was Blaine in that photo. Was she going to tell the press? No, Evelyn wouldn’t do that. She wouldn’t threaten Blaine or Kennedy about it, right? No she’s not like that. 

“How did you know it was Blaine?” Kennedy questioned as Evelyn turned to stare back at the floor, her hands shaking in her lap and her lips trembling softly. 

“You certainly don’t seem like you’d be into Henri or Alexei, and I knew Peter was in the library, and Zaira...well it could have been her but when the photo came out and she didn’t stick up for you, and Blaine did - I knew it had to be her.” Evelyn wiped away her tears, new ones replacing them just as quickly as she rubbed her forehead, Kennedy still processing the situation. 

“Are you going to-”

“I’m not going to tell the press, or anyone else. Your secret is safe with me.” 

“Evelyn...I...thank you…” 

“Don’t.”

Kennedy was taken aback at the harshness of Evelyn’s voice, her sniffles coming to a stop as she turned with a hurt gaze to Kennedy, her brows furrowed in frustration. 

“Don’t thank me for this. It hurts, it hurts so much, more than you could ever imagine Kennedy,” Evelyn’s voice changed, the harshness fading away as her expression softened, “but...I care about you and I want you to be happy...even if that’s not with me, despite what I want deep down, so I will carry on our relationship - for your sake, not mine.” Evelyn’s voice had become so shaky, not unsure but so wounded and hurt. Kennedy didn’t know what to do, and maybe it was panic or pity but the next thing she knew she had pressed her lips to Evelyn’s and was cupping her face in her hands. This kiss was different - different from Blaine, different from the first kiss and different from how she had expected Evelyn to kiss her - it was soft and firm, not moving too quickly. A moment passed as Evelyn pulled away, her hand lingering on the side of Kennedy’s face as she ran her thumb along her jawline, her cold fingers sending a shiver down Kennedy’s body. 

A knock on the door startled both of them, Evelyn jumping up and sliding her mittens back on as Kennedy opened the door, Blaine standing on the other side with a smile as she spotted Evelyn. 

“Hey Evelyn, what’re you doing here?” Blaine smiled at her, Evelyn forcing her lips to a slight curl as she shuffled to the door. 

“I was just leaving.” She glanced at Kennedy, her gaze slightly shifting to Blaine before she ducked out of the room, leaving Kennedy and Blaine alone. 

“What was that all about? Is she still mad about my comments earlier?” Blaine laughed lightly as Kennedy furrowed her brows, the immediate guilt washing over her as Blaine turned with a worried look. 

“Kennedy what’s wrong? You were fine earlier in the hot tub...what happened? Did Evelyn do something to you? I’ll punch her. I swear-” Blaine’s expression was a range of worried, angry and jealous, her grip on Kennedy’s shoulders tightening as she wrapped her in a tight hug, taking in her sweet scent. 

‘No...Blaine…” Kennedy whispered, the guilt of having kissed Evelyn was slowly beginning to eat at her. She buried her head against Blaine’s neck, letting the tension leave her shoulders as Blaine guided her to the bed, gently laying down with her and cuddling her close. 

“Shhh, I’m not going to leave you alone, not like this.” Blaine’s arms were wrapped tightly around Kennedy, giving her a feeling of safety and affection as Blaine gently kissed her forehead. Kennedy closed her eyes, letting herself find some peace in Blaine’s arms as they drifted off to a gentle sleep. 

------------ The Next Day --------------

Kennedy stirred softly, her head aching as she felt Blaine’s warm body pressed against her back, the sound of her soft snoring prompting Kennedy to let out a laugh. Blaine shifted, yawning as she stretched out on the bed before turning and smiling at Kennedy. 

“I could definitely get used to waking up next to you everyday, Rutherland.” Blaine’s  eyebrows wiggled suggestively as Kennedy playfully rolled her eyes, both of them standing up and meeting the other at the door. 

“I’ll see you at breakfast?” Blaine grabbed both of Kennedy’s hands, her eyes lighting up as Kennedy nodded, before she turned and left Kennedy alone in her room. She slipped out of her clothes from yesterday, shivering in the cold air as she settled for a blue themed outfit. 

“Icy Kennedy.” She smiled in satisfaction at herself in the mirror, before the stressful reality set in. Evelyn had feelings for Kennedy, and she knew Blaine was the person in the photo with her. She paced in her room, debating whether to tell all of this to Blaine or not - if she did she knew Blaine would come forward and say it was her but if she didn’t and Blaine found out another way - that’s something Kennedy couldn’t fathom either. A soft knocking at her door startled her, Ayna slowly opening the door with a worried expression as Kennedy stopped pacing. 

“Ayna, what’s up?” Kennedy smiled, trying to play off any suspicious behavior because she certainly didn’t want Ayna to suspect anything, even though she knew Ayna would only want to help. 

“You’re going to miss breakfast, everyone was worried about you so I came to grab you.” Ayna’s sweet smile comforted Kennedy so much she didn’t even realize she’d been shaking - only realizing it as Ayna sat her down and scanned her for injuries. “Did you get hurt yesterday? Should I call medical assistance?” 

“No no, that’s alright Ayna, I appreciate it though.” Kennedy took a long, deep breath before standing and walking to the door with Ayna following behind. “Let’s go eat, I’m starving.” 

Everyone turned to face Kennedy and Ayna as they entered the dining hall, most of the students' plates were cleared as they left for the slopes. Kennedy spotted Blaine - sitting with Dionne, Peter, Zaira and...Evelyn - Kennedy put a smile on her face as she walked to her friends, unsure of if Evelyn had said anything that would prompt suspicion. She carefully took a seat next to Evelyn, Blaine averting her gaze to her food as a server placed a hot plate of Belgian waffles in front of her, beautifully topped with whipped cream and strawberries. 

“Well I’m going to go hit the slopes, I’ve almost beaten my previous record.” Dionne stood with a smile as Peter and Zaira followed her out into the icy wonderland. 

“I’m going to get back to the diamondback slopes Kennedy, I’ll see you later. Stay safe out there today.” Evelyn briskly made her way to the door, taking her skis with her as she smiled at Kennedy. 

I guess keeping a façade up your entire life makes acting easy for Evelyn...but I can’t imagine how much this whole thing is hurting her...let alone for my sake. God I shouldn’t have gotten caught and then none of this would have happened. 

Blaine watched as Kennedy’s smile faded, her eyebrows furrowing as she munched on her waffles, the dining room empty except for the two of them. 

“Kennedy what’s wrong?” Blaine stood and sat next to Kennedy, gently nudging her and stealing a bit of her whipped cream. 

“Blaine...I...it’s worse than we thought…” Kennedy couldn’t hold it in anymore, it was all eating at her and she was overwhelmed and she didn’t want to do this alone despite what she told Blaine last night in the hot tub. “Evelyn has feelings for me and she knows you were the one in the photo with me and I’m worried she’s going to-”

Blaine grabbed Kennedy and her plate of waffles, hastily pulling her into the nearby room and closing the door before handing Kennedy her waffles and sitting on the bed. 

“I didn’t want the press to spot us or anyone to overhear this. Now, Evelyn has feelings for you huh?” Blaine huffed ever so slightly, Kennedy almost missed it. “Coolio. Cooler than snow. Cool cool cool cool…” 

“Blaine chill. I’m more worried about the press-” 

“I am chill. I’m chillier than the chilly winter breeze out there. Why wouldn’t I be chill? Just your fake date having not-so-fake feelings for you. No big deal or anything. You don’t have feelings for her do you?” Blaine’s panicked face made Kennedy smile, she was cute when she was jealous. She smiled at Blaine before recalling her kiss with Evelyn, the guilt sinking back in as she took a seat beside Blaine, grabbing her hand tightly. 

“I don’t Blaine….but I have to tell you something…” Kennedy took a deep breath, her heart beating out of her chest as Blaine tilted her head in confusion. 

“Do tell.”

“When Evelyn came over yesterday-” 

“You fucked Evelyn?” 

“No. I kissed her.”

Blaine just sat there in shock for a minute, her face completely devoid of emotion as Kennedy’s palms grew sweaty. Blaine turned and quickly pressed her lips to Kennedy, a newfound passion between them as they fell back onto the mattress, Blaine’s hands gripping Kennedy tightly - possessively - as Kennedy melted into her touch. 

“Blaine-” Kennedy sat up as Blaine stood with her arms crossed, her face sparkling with a smile - the opposite reaction of what Kennedy was expecting. “You’re not mad.” 

“No, we...aren’t officially together so you’re technically free to kiss whoever you want to.” Blaine spoke flatly, her arms crossed and Kennedy could tell she was a little jealous. 

“It didn’t mean anything Blaine, I only want you.” Kennedy stood beside Blaine, their faces separated by only a few inches. 

“I want them to know.” Blaine uncrossed her arms, her shoulders dropping as she pulled Kennedy close to her. “I want everyone to know it’s you and me.”

“Blaine your reputation…our countries...”

“It's worth losing if it means I have you to myself. So tell me Kennedy, what do you want?”

 “If you think we can do this then let’s do it. I’m with you Blaine.” 

“Together.” Blaine walked out of the room, Kennedy following behind as they casually made their way towards the reporters that were in a clash with Tatum and the other security. 

“Oh my god it’s Blaine! Blaine Hayes of Ardona do you have any comments on-” The reporter pushed her way through security, holding a microphone out to Blaine. Dionne, Peter, Zaira, Ayna and other students turned to see what the commotion was about. Evelyn, Henri and Alexei coming over the slopes and turning to see Kennedy and Blaine facing the reporters. Blaine pushed her way through security, her security guard throwing his hands up in defeat as he stepped aside - the other security cautiously watching the reporters as Kennedy followed behind her, nodding at Tatum as she took a place beside Blaine. 

“Blaine of Ardona, are you enjoying your- The first daughter of Rutherland?!” The reporters gasped, quickly jotting down onto their notepads as one held a mic up to Blaine. “Blaine Hayes, first daughter of Ardona has been spotted with Kennedy Monroe the first daughter of rival country Rutherland on a field trip to camp Eirene. Blaine, do you care to comment on this shocking appearance?” Blaine smiled, her brows raised in amusement as she wrapped an arm around Kennedy, pulling her close as she stared right at the camera and she kissed her softly. 

“I was the woman in the photo with Kennedy on the cover of Voyeur and I should have said that from the start because there’s nobody else I would have wanted to be on that cover with me than her.” Blaine smiled as the reporters gasped in shock as cameras flashed in their faces. Blaine turned to meet Kennedy’s eyes, her arm holding her close as she spoke softly and lovingly despite the chaos that was breaking out around them, “Kennedy Monroe is mine. I want everyone to know that.” 

Blaine softly kissed Kennedy in front of everyone, their classmate’s breaking into shock as Dionne applauded with Peter, the reporters camera’s flashed making sure they got the shot. Blaine and Kennedy pulled apart as security removed the satisfied reporters from the scene, Blaine gently held onto Kennedy’s hand, both of them relieved that they didn’t have to hide anymore and that they’d get through all the repercussions - together. 

[bee-cried]

Blues Daydream I had recurringly over the past few days.

I've written some of the daydream down but I never really put together a coherent story, so I'm just retelling it from memory mostly. (Content warning for the mention of sex.)

It starts of with them at like ...13 (?) The RRB are neutral and have befriended the ppg. Bubbles has a crush on Boomer (she starts crushing on him when she's like... 8)

There's a porch swing in this really pretty picnic park that Bubbles likes to visit a lot. It's surrounded by lots of bushes and flowers. She usually sits there by herself until Boomer starts showing up. He usually joins her to show her the songs he's learned on his acoustic guitar (he doesn't have a special musical talent but i love the fanon idea of Boomer being a music fanatic. Its very fitting, so I always imagine that he naturally just ends up gravitating towards music). They'll stay there for hours (especially during the summer) singing songs they know or just talking.

He gets really comfortable with Bubbles and they look forward to seeing one another.

And this scene stuck out to me in my head specifically...

***

Boomer: "Bubbles,  I have to tell you something. "

Boomer: *Kisses her on the cheek.*

Bubbles and Boomer: ...

Bubbles: "What is it that you have to tell me?"

Boomer: *laughs,  blushing* "I only said that as a cover up to kiss you."

Bubbles: "Oh! Well I have to tell you something  too then..."

Bubbles: *Kisses him*

Boomer: *surprised* " You just… kissed me on the lips…"

Bubbles: "I know…" :) "DON'T TELL THE PROFESSOR." (She panics)

Boomer: *Blushing and smug* "I won't. "

They both giggle. He strums his guitar. 

***

Later in the daydream he asks her on a date. She tells the Professor, because she's over joyed but unfortunately, the professor doesnt approve because Boomer is a villain and he doesn't want Bubbles to date a "punk who'll just break her heart."

Bubbles is really upset (she cry's about it) and she ends up trying to sneak out. She tells Buttercup who doesn't really care (until Bubbles involves allowance money.) to cover for her. Later, Bubbles tells Kim, Mary and Robin and they agree to help her sneak out for her first date, saying they'll let her cover by telling the professor she's at a sleepover with Robin.

There's a scene I imagine where all the girls put together money to buy a really pretty spaghetti strapped dress that comes with a white, light material-like shawl that's also like a jacket (i hope you understand what i mean lol.) Anyway, it's really gorgeous and they sneak it in. Kim explains to Bubbles this technique she read in a magazine. She tells Bubbles when Boomer looks at her to untie the shawl "like this" and only wear the dress part.

Bubbles sneaks out on the date with Boomer. They go to like some fun kids place with an indoor trampoline and an arcadia.

***

The night was a little breezy but that was alright since Bubbles figured most of the night would be spent indoors. She saw the arcadia lights come into place and began to steer down. As she landed she spotted Boomer in the usual Hollister shirt and jeans- well actually those jeans looked sort of new. Maybe they were.

He turned to her and smiled at her appearance. She suddenly felt a smidgen bad for having to make him wait so long. If only she didn't have to stay out of sight from the professor. "You actually waited for me?"

"For you, I'd wait until the ends of the universe." He grinned. Her heart pounded.

She blushes as he leads her into the fun place by the hand. Entering her attention was instantly caught by the sounds of the indoor trampoline, ticket counters and all the acrcade games to play. Pop music played over the rush of kids and preteens like her running around.

She smiled in awe, "Wow," she said aloud, eyeing all of her options to play with.

"Pretty cool right?" Boomer said, smiling back at her. She'd felt the heat of their hands at his gentle expression. She'd just realized they were approaching a short line. "It's pretty new. I think it opened last month. I've been eyeing this place for weeks. " he said unable to hide his own excitement.

She blushed and giggled.

Soon they were routed to cubbys to put some of there belongings in.

"Really? Cubbys? It's like we're in fifth grade all over again." Boomer sneers as he sets some items inside. "Well I guess you don't have much to put in but your purse..." His words drifts off as he watches her excitedly undo her shawl, stuffing it into her cubby. "Uh...." He mutters before she grabs his hand.

"Yeah we're sooo old for cubbys now," she agreed grinning. He looks at her, blushing slightly. "Come on!" She exclaims as she tugs him eagerly along towards the trampoline.

***

They go to the trampoline, play games and he even buys her fro yo, they admit to each other that they're their first dates.

***

"So Harry and Julie are definitely dating now." Boomer comments as they watch their friends at the other end of the arcadia play games. Harry looked a little shy but Julie was very open and boisterous.

Bubbles giggled, "yeah, I guess they are." She said as she eyed them. She and Boomer were in the cafe part of the arcadia. They'd picked a table but there were also small booths and a stage at the front.

"I wonder what got them together." Boomer said thoughtfully. "They're so different from each other, I never would have guessed."

Bubbles ate a spoonful of her fro yo, "Maybe. You know what they say, opposites attract." She grinned. He turned back to her, catching her grinning and smiling himself. It was probably they're tenth time they did that tonight. Bubbles didn't know, she wasn't actually counting how many times, she just knew every time it happened it made her heart flutter.

"Y' know..." Boomer started, looking back at his fro yo. "You're the first girl I've ever asked on a date." He said tilting his head a little.

The butterflies in Bubbles stomach made her dizzy, "you're the first boy I've ever dated."

Their eyes met and the sound of the arcadia went fuzzy. She was looking for something else to say but her heart felt like it was caught in her throat-

A high-pitched blare sounded from the speakers, and they both jumped, blushing madly. A tall man took to the stage in front of them.

***

And whaddya know, it's karaoke night.

So Boomer asks her to sing a song on stage with him, even though she's extremely shy. They sing some pop song that's somewhat relevant in the year 2006 (I imagine 'Anything but Ordinary' by Avril but I dunno). It's the first time Boomer hears Bubbles sing and he's really shocked but RUH ROH the professor (and a very guilty looking Buttercup) appear admist the crowd of preteens and ... Yeah, she gets in trouble.

At home, the professor scolds her more (he has good intentions. He really just wants to protect Bubbles.) Bubbles ends up crying because the professor won't 'accept their love'. (There's a scene that plays in my head where Robin shows up and she see's Bubbles crying. Bubbles starts declaring that she doesn't care that Boomer is a Rowdyruff boy she 'loves him'...

***

Bubbles: "And I don't care what anybody else says, he's not that evil! He can't help who his parents are!"

Robin: "I know but... The Professor makes a good point. Are you sure you want to date Boomer?"

Bubbles: *looks at her with a 'really' look through her glossy eyes.*

Robin: "Oh yeah. I forgot. He's been your crush since you were 8 years old. "

***

The next day she goes to talk to him but he's like "uh... Yeah, I actually wanna... Break up." She thinks it's because of how the date ended (Professor was not a happy man when he retrieved Bubbles that night. Also she was wearing a spaghetti-strapped dress. It was too cold outside!) He reassures her its not because of how the date ended, he just... Sort of realized he wasnt really all that into her like he thought he was (?). Also, he has a growing suspension that the Professor hates his guts. And his explanation for why he's suddenly breaking up with Bubbles is ridiculous...

***

"It was more of like... How does Brick put it?" Boomer puts a thoughtful hand up to his chin, "a fleeting moment...?" He smiles in recollection. "Yeah, I think it was just a fleeting moment."

Bubbles looked down at the tile, her voice soft, "But I thought you liked me..."

"I do like you!" He justified, instantly. Then he looked away, a little hesitant, "I just... Just as a friend though." He looks at her, a bit guilt-ridden, "y'know?"

***

...but sadly that's all she can get out of him is that he just doesn't think they'd make a good couple.

Back at home, the professor talks with Bubbles again. He explains to her that he's sorry for berating her. He trusts her to make the right decisions and who she dates shouldn't be decided by him. He encourages Bubbles to date "who her heart says it right for her" but she stuns him by agreeing that Boomer is no good and that she doesn't want to date him.... Or maybe anyone else at the moment.

So going to that porch swing in the middle of the park is never really the same because she's either alone or Boomer is occupying it before she gets there (he's lowkey waiting for her but obviously Bubbles is not in the mood to entertain him anymore.)

Then high school happens and they're in a weird zone of 'we're exes, but are we really exes because we dated when we were 13 and that was only for one day, and we used to be so close before that.' Slowly, they start talking again (they share classes) and Bubbles starts having a crush on him again but then Boomer just HAS to be an oblivious goof and get a girlfriend. Some hot, popular girl from the cheer squad who everyone says looks like Meghan Foxes younger sister, so Bubbles is like "aw poo." But bubbles isn't heartbroken just slightly disappointed.

Well, Bubbles joins the cheer squad and Boomers hot, popular girlfriend who looks like Meghan Foxes younger sister isn't very fond of that. I don't know what Boomers gf name is but she's jealous of Bubbles, as well as, Bubbles relationship with Boomer (the school knows about their middle school fling.) Meghan Fox jr starts shit-talking Bubbles to Boomer or when Boomer is hanging out with her and her friends ("she's literally so weird, the other day I saw her talking to a squirrel." "Does she like *snorts* ever grow up?" "Omg did you see the outfit she put together the other day? She looks and sounds like an overgrown 6th grader") but "surprisingly" Boomer always tries to shut that shit down, and every time Meghan fox jr asks Boomer why he says it's because Bubbles is his friend.

Meanwhile, Bubbles meets this guy accompanying the porch swing one school evening, she goes over and it's Mike. He's been away from Townsville for some time and he's come back because his parents needed to move back awhile and you can sort of see where this is going...

Bubbles and Mike start hanging out a lot. Boomer is taken aback by the relationship Bubbles and Mike has because he starts gaining feelings for Bubbles again. Meghan Fox jr tries to isolate Bubbles from the cheer squad because she suspects her boyfriend is more into Bubbles than her. School dance happens, school dance shenanigans. There's a talent show in there somewhere that Bubbles agrees to perform a song with Boomer for their partners. Valentine's day shits. And other small scenarios... But through all this time Boomer is regaining those feelings he once had for Bubbles and he becomes a lot more jealous.

Meghan Fox Jr's antics become a lot more mean-spirited as well. (Especially during junior year The principal has to step in and Bubbles ends up leaving the squad on her own terms. ) and after that huge occurrence, Boomer is completely turned off by Meghan Fox jr. He breaks up with her.

Unfortunately, he's kicked from his friend group and a lot of rumors are spread about Boomer (most likely by Meghan Fox jr.) Boomer and Meghan Fox jr had a very.... Affectionate(?) relationship...

Basically, when your parents don't really care about what you do in your free time or who you hang out with, and you're young and curious and you have an attractive bf/gf, sex can happen. And sex was what made Boomer and Meghan Fox jr stay together. She uses that after they break up to harass him though.

Uhm, Mike's parents have to move again, so he and Bubbles agree it's best if they broke up before he moves away.

Okay. So back at square one. Bubbles and Boomer are single and they like each other- well really, Boomer likes Bubbles. Bubbles admires him, but now she's over the crush thing lol.

So now Boomer is set on Bubbles. He ends up revisiting that porch swing only to find Bubbles is there. (During his relationship with Meghan Fox jr. he avoids it. Partially because he's in a relationship and also because when Bubbles and Mike are together, they usually occupy the swing.) Again they swing and sit for hours like when they were younger.

He finds his new growing attraction is unbearable in the sense that, there is a constant attraction he has to her that he can't manipulate. He goes through a lot of inner turmoil trying to find out why he likes her even though she's clearly over him, so shouldn't he be the same? He's fighting the attraction, trying to ignore it but the more they hang out the more it grows. And that continues into the summer before they're seniors.

With a lot more free time, they spend more time together but it's usually outings with their friends (unless he meets her in the park on the porch swing). Their bond continues to build but Bubbles is unsure if he likes her, and he's unsure if she likes him and then my brain just skips to a night when they're on the swing...

***

Boomer strummed his guitar as the crickets sung around them, the swing light dim. He suddenly stops his strumming, "Hey remember when you kissed me? When we were 13?"

Bubbles laughed and covered her lips, her cheeks colored slightly, "that was so long ago." She turned her eyes to him, "when we were kids."

"Oh yeah. And that epic date I took you on." He recalled. She shoved him light-heartedly.

"You dated me for a day and left me broken-hearted for two months." She grinned smug.

Boomer's eyes widened, "2 months? You were that into a dumb kid like me?"

"Of course I was," she said her eyes, not on him but looking at the stars above them. The night was beautiful and warm. She drew her knees on the swing as she gazed up. " I always liked you... Ever since we were kids I kinda..." He watched as she giggled awkwardly and her cheeks became even redder. She finally shrugged and turned her gaze to him, "I kinda told my friends I was in love with you."

He thought this over as their eyes locked. His heart felt like it was going to jump through his chest.

She looked back at the stars, "I even told the Professor." Her eyes had a small shimmer in them. "It was-" she scoffed and dropped her head, shaking it, "it was so stupid honestly."

He wanted to touch her hand, but it was wrapped around her knees, holding them together. He thought of all the things he could do. He could rest his arms on the seat, almost on her shoulders. He could scoot closer until they were touching. He could fiddle with the shoelace of her shoe.

Instead, he scoffed as well and turned his attention to the neck of his guitar, hoping she couldn't tell he was blushing. "Yeah. We were pretty dumb."

***

They end up talking about their childhood and one thing leads to another and they kiss. But nothing interrupts them so it's just awkward and they say bye.

Eventually, they start dating and yeaaaaah... If this were going to be a fic, I pretty much spoiled it lmao. But i wanted to share that with you guys cause i know there are other blues stans out there and we don't get that much love in the "more serious" fanfic department so I know every little thing adds up 😌👌

I honestly wish i could stay committed to writing a fic but i have horrible self-discipline and initiative D: Sorry y'all but i hope you enjoyed it c:

[normal-thoughts-official]

Thoughts on mermaid Magnus au

my immediate thought is “magnus and maia brotp!” because like yeah? yeah? maia? marine biologist? magnus? mermaid? yeah? yeah? yeah! so like maia is this aspiring marine biologist who lives by the seaside and she’s always trying to figure out new ways to watch the ocean from afar, since she’s kind of scared of the ocean, you know, maybe especially because she’s a marine biologist and she knows all the weird stuff that lives in there.. anyway she eventually ends up seeing magnus because she was out there staring at the ocean wishing that she’d get to courage to at least snorkel dive or something and oops there is some guy coming out of the water and he DEFINITELY has a tail even if it transforms into legs when he’s on the ground or like smth idk and she’s like “what” and magnus is like “uh” and she’s like “uh” and they’re like “uh”

anyway cue magnus freaking out because obviously a mundane shouldn’t know about mermaids and what the hell does he DO now but maia is just like “wow. that would... solve a lot of my problems” and magnus is all confused and she explains to him that she loves the ocean and wants to be a biologist one day but she’s terrified of the sea, and magnus is like “ah. well. you have to be born a mermaid” and she chuckles like “bummer” and he’s like “...and you’re not freaking out about this” 

so you know, she promises she won’t tell anyone and who would believe her anyway? and he ends up sitting down beside her and she asks questions about what living in the ocean is like and stuff and he answers and eventually the sun is going up and he goes “ah. better go back home while i won’t be seen” and she teases him that he’s not that good at not being seen 

anyway! so the next night they see each other again and she asks him even more questions and he even like, brings some stuff for her to see and shows it to her? you know? and she’s super excited about it and it’s hella cute

and it goes on for like a week or so until one day magnus brings raphael with him (did you REALLY think i wouldn’t bring him into this) because before he wasn’t sure if he could trust maia but after a while has passed and she clearly hasn’t told a soul and is obviously just interested in seeing magnus’ aquatic friends and hearing his stories, he figures it’s safe to bring him too. he just wants to introduce his new friend to his boy and it’s cute

raphael is understandably a little scared because there magnus is, befriending mundanes, and they fucking know how dangerous that can be but magnus is a stubborn unstoppable asshole when he wants to so he figures it’s best if he knows about it than if he doesn’t. but him and maia get along fine. eventually he ends up pointing at the sky and he says “i’ve always been fascinated by that, you know?”

and maia is like “what?” and raphael is like “the stars. we grow up in the deep sea, so we don’t really see them. what you call the ‘sky’, to me, has always been the surface. but then when i broke out... there was more. this huge, untouchable thing, a surface over the surface. and it’s so beautiful” and maia pauses for a while and she’s like “you know, if you are willing to teach me what you know about the deep sea, i can teach you about the stars” 

and magnus huffs like “and what do i get in return?” and she’s like “what do you want to learn about?” and he promptly goes, “the surface”

because magnus is a curious guy and he loves to learn and he’s always wanted to learn about the surface, but he only tried once and he was too scared that he would be found out, especially as he had no idea what mundane culture was like. and maia’s like well that’s easy to solve, i can show you around” and raphael is like no and magnus is like yes and maia is like yes and raphael is like then i’ll come too because he’s not letting magnus just wander around with mundanes

maia is like “it sounds like you are the papa bear in the relationship” and magnus is like “oh, don’t be mistaken my dear, if it were the other way around i wouldn’t let him” and raphael huffs but well, fine

so the following night they hang out some (i’m guessing maia has to bring them both clothes?) and maia shows magnus the town and magnus is in awe because wow there is so much stuff going on at nighttime. he never knew because the beach is relatively secluded, which is why he never expected to see maia there

the next night it’s raphael and maia’s turn to satisfy their curiosity so she teaches him the basics of the constellations and tells him a bit about astrology and like, a basic history of beliefs surrounding the stars and stuff like that. you know? Mundane Sky 101. in return raphael starts teaching her about the deep sea fishes and the mermaid’s knowledge of them as well. and they kinda bond because they are both fascinated by things that are out of their reach in many ways? and it’s like sweet and they smile at each other and stuff

then the next night it’s magnus’ turn, and it goes back and forth like this for a while. until one day magnus tells maia that he wants to visit during the day? see what it’s like and all. and she’s like well okay, i suppose you can... sleep at my place on friday and then we go out on saturday so i can have the day to show you around. and he’s like what is saturday. but they make a deal

raphael lowkey hates it during daytime because it’s so... bright and full of people (autistic raphael babey!) and noise and just, very different from what he’s used to, so he feels a little overwhelmed by it all. but magnus loves it. and it’s during one of their day adventures that magnus meets alec, because let’s be real, alec is just not a nighttime guy

and idk how exactly this would go but they hit it off and like you know. also at this point magnus knows quite a bit about mundane life so he can pretend swiftly and he’s always been smart and good at socializing so they’re like, on equal ground, just throwing this out there. and they get along well and soon magnus is flirting and, to raphael’s horror, alec is responding, so this is something that they all deal with now. magnus makes up something about being from the city and only coming on the weekends to explain why he isn’t around any other day and saturdays kind of become “magnus is going to see alec” time and raphael and maia are kind of just chilling on the corner of the cafe or something, talking

and there’s gonna be some coming out as a literal mermaid angst involved here but idk. maybe to be extra cliche alec goes visit maia saturday night and they get there just in time to see raphael and magnus going into the water and swimming away or something lmao. anyway alec is understandably shocked by the whole thing as his whole world has been tipped off its axis and he’s kind of freaking out but not because he’s like, afraid or something, just because it’s a lot to wrap his head around

so like idk the next morning alec waits for them at the beach with maia? or something? lmao and magnus almost has a panic attack but he tells him that he’s already seen and i guess from there alec becomes magnus’ guide to the mundane world? since he now officially knows. maia and raphael are not gonna leave the two of them together yet but now that he knows he has so many date ideas, things magnus has never seen before, you know. and magnus falls all that much harder because alec just... accepted that and wanted to show him things and it’s cute

and also maia and raphael get to spend more nights alone at the beach talking and looking at the stars and maybe raphael gets to show her things and it’s also cute. and they all fall in love and this is irrelevant but i love the mental image that magnus has a golden tail and raphael has a silvery tail, simply because the colors suit them respectively (even aesthetically, esp gold for magnus) and there is that whole... you know. gold and silver thing. idk i just love this

anyway magnus and alec start dating and so do maia and raphael and everyone is happy and cute and i guess magnus starts spending more and more time as a mundane and no idea how this would happen but fuck it lmao maybe maia and raphael study together and get into college and he gets to actually learn astronomy and she does groundbreaking research with maybe a little help as a marine biologist and idk what’s going on anymore this lore is a mess the end

[soobrat]

*･༓☾ bloodshot // johnny ☽༓･*

chapter ii // masterlist

*pairing*

you x johnny + some jungwoo (and I guess Taeyong?)

*chapter rating* mature

*warnings* explicit sexual content, mentions of slurs and sexism (it’s another jungwoo smut chapter)

*word count* 3.03k

*disclaimer(s)* Once again I don't think nayeon, johnny, or lucas actually act this way, and this goes for everyone in the future

♥　♡　♥　♡　♥　♡　♥

"Again?" Your eyes lit up. Jungwoo has never had so much drive before.

"I wanna give you all my love and attention until neither of us can take it anymore." He caresses your cheek and you melt into him. Your bed fitted with brown silk sheets and a tan comforter became a sort of sacred fortress in the past two months. Jungwoo has been an angel through the come down of the incident.

"Jisoo told me you haven't been giving her as much attention, though." You lace your fingers with his, noting every mole and mark down his arm. Jungwoo sighs.

"I know... I just hate seeing you like this. If only she was able come and cuddle with us."

It's been a month since you and Jungwoo made it official. It didn't feel like anything changed, you wonder if open relationships always felt this way.

"You just want to watch Jisoo and I kiss." You roll your eyes. Jungwoo shoots up from the bed.

"You guys kiss?!" You snort at his baffled expression.

"No, and I prefer it that way. I'm pretty sure Jisoo prefers our relationships separate as well." You glance at him, knowing he knows you're right. He huffs in defeat before falling back onto the bed.

"Imagine how great the three of us could be, though." Jungwoo pouts, seemingly forgetting about round 4.

No matter how much he pouted, you and Jisoo were 100% platonic. You liked you guys' dynamic and neither of you wanted to change it.

Those two together almost made you forget about all the online ridicule you received. Almost.

You couldn't leave Taeyong. The others, no sweat off your back. Taeyong, however, was your first love. And although you had no more romantic feelings for him, you still loved him. Even if he was dating a girl who made your life a living hell. You could cut off Johnny and Lucas, but not Nayeon. If you had to do anymore streams with that devil you'd scream.

You groan as you die again. Good thing you were near spawn anyway. You hurry and gather your items before the ridicule commences.

"____ you're really fucking everything up. This must be why women are inferior." She purposefully puts a shit-ton of nasality in her voice when she talks to you. It makes you want to rip your ears off your head. Taeyong's laugh reads of disbelief.

"Nayeon why would you say that?!"

You just laughed awkwardly. How do their viewers not die of boredom? It's the same god-forsaken cycle. Nayeon makes a self-loathing sexist joke, Taeyong pretends to be shocked, the chat erupts in response. You wonder if men get off on women constantly stating that they're inferior.

"Ugh just fucking come with me." Nayeon's character sprints off before you could think.

"Wait a minute!" You jump and run at her. You switch to your iron sword, pretending to strike her from behind. Your mind wanders as you pretend to hit her. What has your life become? You almost jump at the sound of Nayeon receiving damage. She gasped like someone killed her dog, not someone accidentally hitting her on Minecraft.

"What the f-" You chut as Nayeon starts swinging her diamond sword at you.

"When did you get diamonds?" You try and jump and avoid her but she still hits you twice. You laugh uncontrollably as you try to get away. Taeyong reacts in disbelief, as usual.

"Girls! Stick to the plan!"

"I only have one heart!" You hurry and equip your shield to defend yourself.

"You hit me!" Nayeon exclaims. You notice the nasality is gone, and that you're having fun. Your smile nearly splits your face in half. You block her attacks and deal a good amount of damage until she dies. You laugh, tears in your eyes. You could get used to this, possibly finally have a female streamer friend?

You stop laughing when you notice how quiet it was. Then you hear sniffling.

"____ why can't you take a fucking joke? You're always so violent over fucking jokes!"

Then issnayeon went offline. She left the discord call. You and Taeyong were silent. Then Taeyong left as well. You were afraid to look at your chat. You clear your throat, suddenly very aware of the webcam pointed at your face.

"That was really odd, I guess I misunderstood the situation." You were beginning to get defensive, but you knew that wouldn't end well. Your eyes flicker over at your second monitor against your own wishes.

Flashes of 'cunt', 'snowflake', and most importantly, 'apologize' were visible from the chat. So you did apologize.

"I'm sorry to Nayeon and her viewers for being childish. I clearly misunderstood the situation," You paused, trying to gather your thoughts and blink away the tears stinging your eyes. You were such a baby.

"I'm also sorry for... uh... forcing my personal feelings and beliefs into a video game and onto Nayeon. I hope you guys understand where I'm coming from and accept my apology. Anyways, I think that'll be it for the stream tonight guys. I'll see you Wednesday."

You knew you weren't supposed to abruptly close the stream, especially without a closing screen. You just wanted to escape quickly. The stinging got worse until warm tears rolled down your cheeks. Everything that just happened was suddenly clicking. You were in for a shitstorm. More tears stream down your cheeks as you feel your phone buzz. You pick it up, blinking tears away.

"Jisoo..." Your voice quivered. Why were you so sensitive?

"Just breathe, okay?" Jisoo spoke calmly and with warmth but all you could think about was the aftermath of all this. Jisoo watched every stream she could, so maybe she saw.

"Could you see me tear up on camera? Was it obvious?" The panic in your voice was very evident?

"What? Who cares about that, ____ Nayeon's a bitch-"

"I do! Now I look like even more of a pussy, and everyone's gonna know that I'm sensitive-" You hiccup, trying not to sob.

"You're not a pussy. If anyone's a pussy here, it's Nayeon. You have to endure mockery from other streamers or your own chat every time you stream, and you keep persevering. Most of those people calling you a snowflake couldn't do the same." The passion in Jisoo's voice made you realize why you loved her. Why you were so glad you met her through Jungwoo.

"I don't want you to ever lose your fire for combatting sexism. Don't let these online idiots distract from the fact that sexism is our reality. You're not a pussy for not tolerating jokes about shit you deal with on a daily basis from people who would never understand."

Your sobs echoed throughout your room. You weren't crying because of the chat or Nayeon anymore, though. It was because of how thankful you were for Jisoo. Deep down, you didn't even believe the things you preached yourself. A small part of you envied Nayeon. The fact that she could laugh at those jokes and even say them herself.

You wondered how much easier it would be if you just... gave in.

You had just come back to streaming two months after the first incident, and now you had to take another break. At least until the internet cooled down. This all spurred from something so stupid, but it just enough for people to further their sexist narrative. Johnny was quiet about the incident, but Lucas was as loud as ever.

"Imagine being so butthurt about a joke." He tweeted. Your thumb hovered over the tweet. You shouldn't. You shouldn't read the replies. You really shouldn't read the replies.

You click the tweet and scroll to the replies, heart pumping.

"People have gotten so much more sensitive, can't say shit these days."

"She was about to cry... over a joke."

Hand trembling, you went to read more for some stupid reason. You were getting so worked up, why were you doing this to yourself?

"You guys scream "it's just a joke" but then cry yourself to sleep when a girl says KAM."

You perk up. People are defending you? That tweet was so close to passing the others in likes as well. You swiped more.

"I'm glad she speaks up against those unfunny assholes. I'm actually pissed she apologized."

"Nayeon is the butthurt one here. Boohoo someone hit you in a game."

"Your jokes aren't funny."

There were still tweets bashing you, but there was significant pushback. You smile. You like all the tweets defending you. This would probably bite you in the ass later, but you didn't care. You even retweeted one.

"I don't even like _____ but this 'controversy' is the dumbest thing to get headlines I've ever seen. You people need a hobby."

You had yet to see the headlines, but Lucas' tweets about the subject were probably the reason it was blowing up. Filled with a shot of confidence, you wanted to see who's name was trending.

At number two is issnayeon. Of course, Nayeon is a lot more popular so her name would be mentioned a lot more. Something else catches your eye near the bottom of the screen, however.

jonssuh.

Curious, you click the topic.

"Since we're talking about ____, can we talk about how you guys called her crazy and never questioned jonssuh?"

The tweet seemed to spark conversation, racking in a serious amount of engagement.

"jonssuh is lowkey the one who initiates all the sexist shit"

"____ is a psycho snowflake, that's why no one questioned jonssuh"

It was interesting to see how split the replies were. Within days there was a rift in the streaming community. You were either Team ____ or Team Johnny. You weren't sure how Johnny got dragged into this when it was about you and Nayeon, but it was truly fascinating.

Speaking of Nayeon.

"Out of everyone involved, she's receiving the most flack." You scan the board, wracking your brain for your next move. All you could focus on was the hum of Jisoo's air conditioner and dogs barking down the hall from her apartment.

"Good. I'm sorry but she started this shit. I don't hate the girl but man she has some issues she needs to work out. Hurry and move by the way! This is why we need a timer."

Every move seemed flawed by this point. You were too hasty in the beginning. You sigh before moving your Queen.

"Well I hate her." You settle back into your chair, folding your arms.

"Yeah. I know." Jisoo swiftly scoops up your queen. You groan, tossing your head back.

"I thought I really planned that out nicely." You cross your arms tighter as your expression soured.

"Sorry babes. Also, about Nayeon. She's a woman, too."

You look up at Jisoo, who's still looking intently at the board.

"Huh?"

"I'm just saying. She's struggling just as much. Hurry and go!"

You roll your eyes, refusing to process her hubbub. You had to focus on how to plan your game better.

For the most part, you ignored the online battle, especially Lucas' endless subtweets. You unfollowed both Lucas and Johnny after this whole debacle, which according to Jisoo only escalated things. It was all out war.

You unfortunately couldn't escape the headlines. Your name was synonymous with oversensitivity now, while Johnny's was synonymous with sexism. You eventually caved in and spectated the battle. There was a lot of support for both sides, but the criticism was loud. Especially well worded criticism from respectable sources.

Instead of calling you a snowflake, popular youtubers argued that your actions directly hindered people's right to freedom of speech.

As for Johnny, people were maturely stating how his actions, while funny to him, were extremely harmful and almost oppressive towards women.

Both sides argued that both your behavior had damaging effects on the streaming community. This was bad. You just wanted respect, goddammit.

The comments were filled with both of your supporters questioning their support of either of you. You sat in your gaming chair for what felt like hours, spinning in circles. What in the world could you do? Your phone began to buzz in your lap.

"Taeyong?" You pick up quickly after seeing the name. Taeyong hadn't talked to you since that day.

"No. Johnny."

Your shoulders drop.

"Why?"

"I don't know if you noticed recently but we're kinda fucked. And if you're referring to me calling on Tae's phone, you blocked my number so," Johnny sounded defeated. You couldn't even find joy in it, it was so pitiful.

"So you're calling me for..."

"We clearly both have some common ground to discover."

"I kinda disagree buddy." You chuckle.

"So what, you want to have a conversation over the phone?" You scratch at your head. What is going through this man's brain?

"No. I want to start collabing with you again. Just me and you."

You freeze.

"How that fuck would that fix anything? You think spending more time together will magically make us get along? You do understand why I don't like you, right?"

"Whatever- look we don't have to actually find common ground. We could fake it so we can stop getting fucked up the ass by youtube essays." Johnny was starting to get his usual pissed off tone.

"Okay, yeah." You shrug as if he can see you. You can hear him shuffling eagerly.

"Really?"

"Fuck no." You hang your phone up before tossing it on your bed. You could handle this on your own. You had a genuine purpose for your actions. Johnny was literally just selfish and using low hanging (offensive) fruit to get more subs. People would understand you.

You adjust your tripod, making sure it was angled perfectly. It was simple, you'd just sit down and be straightforward with your side of the story.

"Hey guys. I know there has been a lot of craziness going on, and I just wanted to explain myself."

You explained how the streaming community made you feel as a woman. How you didn't regret not giving in to the sexism. You felt confident that at least your supporters would come back around.

-

"You've refreshed YouTube at least 80 times already. I came over here to take your mind off of things." Jungwoo wrapped his arms tighter around your waist. The light from your phone reflected against your glasses. The video got one dislike immediately when you posted it, followed by three more seconds later. By now, there were hundreds of likes and a dozen dislikes. Your lip started to sting as you peeled the skin from it with your teeth. Your eyebrows were knitted tightly together as you skimmed the comments.

R slurs and snowflake's were a given, but most of them sympathized with you. You refreshed, scrolled, hearted, and repeat. As you scrolled more, the criticism came pouring in. You kept scrolling until you found what you were subconsciously looking for. Well worded, damning criticism.

"I love your content and have been watching you for a while, but if these people bother you so much, why do you still interact with them? I remember you saying a long time ago that you and Nayeon didn't get along very well... so why? I was waiting for you to cut all of them off but you never did. I'm glad the guys are gone but why is Nayeon still frequently streaming with you?"

Your initial response would be because of Taeyong, but you knew it was a horrible excuse. It just clicked that you were putting yourself through torture for a taken man who never even showed interest in you once. Did Taeyong really even care about you?

You physically shake the thoughts away before locking your phone.

"Finally." Jungwoo swipes the phone from your hand and tosses it away. Before you could protest, he tenderly kisses your lips. His lips were so soft. With tentative touches, he turned you to fully face him. He threads his fingers through the nape of your hair, deepening the kiss.

"Focus on me, okay?"

He moves one of his hands down your body. He slides his hand under your shirt, leaving goosebumps in its wake. You gasp and flinch at how cold they are. He smirks against your lips, hand squeezing your clothed breast. You sigh against his mouth before nipping at his bottom lip. He slips his hand under your bra. He pinches your erect nipples and you hiss.

With his other hand he cups your panty clad core. You grind into him, encouraging him to go further. He complies silently, sliding his hand into your panties. He sighs blissfully at how wet you are. He curls two fingers into your slick hole. They slip right in, the tips of his fingers brushing deliciously against your walls. Goosebumps crawl up your arms as you clench Jungwoo's arm.

Your senses are clouded as you focus on his touch. He felt so good. You bite your lip as you squeeze his arm harder. No man has ever made you feel this way. You revel in the way his fingers brush perfectly against your g-spot. Why were you worried about Taeyong anyway?

Taeyong. You furrowed your brows, trying to rid thoughts of him. The way tears filled his eyes when he laughed too hard. His intoxicating smell. His soft skin and hair. His kind eyes. His comforting touches.

"____?"

"Why does she still hang out with Taeyong and Nayeon?"

He hasn't been answering your calls or texts...

"Taeyong is like poison to her, she should cut him off."

He never defended you...

"Taeyong is ruining ____."

Did Taeyong ever really care about you?

"____! Are you okay?"

You feel numb as Jungwoo grips your shoulders. He tries to look into your eyes but you keep avoiding him.

"Let's go get cleaned up okay?"

"I think I'm still in love with Taeyong." Tears spill down your cheeks. You've cried more in the last few months than you have in at least a decade. It seems to all tie back to Taeyong somehow. Jungwoo was still for a second.

"Come on. Let's go clean up."

＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚　끝　˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

[oldsoldierr]

The Carnation ~ Part 1

summary: the media always told you that the famous art critic bucky barnes is an arrogant, rude playboy and you agree, but something still draws you to him. is there a deeper reason to why he acts the way he does or is he the class A jackass you first met?

art critic!bucky x artist!reader

word count: about 2.8k

series masterlist 

Your art studio was silent except for the occasional paper turning from the person across the room from you. The only sound you were paying attention to was the smooth sliding of the brush on the canvas as you traced a carnation from the actual deep maroon flower behind the painting. That was until you heard a jingle from the door. Soon after a set of footsteps came your way. You sighed putting your paintbrush down. 

“Hi, Steve.” He gave you a charming smile and sat down next to you with his sketchbook. 

“How was your day?”

“Actually pretty good. I got almost a third of my commissions done,” he responded.

“How was yours?” He took out some charcoal from his bag.

“Ugh, not great. I was almost halfway done with a painting when fucking Brock bumped into me and made me drop it before it was dry.” Your fingers curled into a fist just thinking about it but you strategically didn’t go into the details to avoid getting too angry. 

“Well, I think I have some news that might just make your day better.” Steve grinned. 

You looked at Steve curiously.

“What is it?”

“‘You remember Natasha? The one I talked to you about yesterday?” You paused for a moment racking your memory, then nodded.

“Your coworker?”

“Mhm. Well, she told me word has it that Bucky Barnes is coming to Brooklyn!” He looked to you for a reaction. You shifted at the mention of the name. 

“Is that really a good thing?” You asked. Steve looked at you like you just said the earth was flat. 

“Are you deaf? I just said the Bucky Barnes, as in the world-famous art critic is coming to our city!” he emphasized. When he still didn’t get a good reaction he elaborated.

“He’s made so many careers with just one review. He could be your chance at a better life! He could be your chance to launch your art career into the stratosphere!” You looked at him skeptically with a raised eyebrow.

“I really don’t think so,” You replied logically. “I mean, he’s practically the Gordon Ramsey of art. And not in the funny, badass way. Did you forget he’s also broken more than his fair share of careers?”

“Yeah, of course, I know, but it’s a risk worth taking!” he tried again.You looked down at the floor nervously and fidgeted with your fingers. This time it was Steve’s turn to look suspicious.

“Wait, you’ve never been afraid of a risk.” He realized. “You literally jumped off a bridge once just because you were bored. What’s really going on?” You bit your lip. You debated the best course of action inside your head before saying, “Fine.” You sighed.

“I just-- I don’t like him,” you admitted.

“What, why?” Steve asked, looking slightly offended.

“He’s just such that kind of person ya know? The kind of person that thinks they’re better than everyone else and struts around acting like they own everything.”

“What do you mean? You’ve never even met him before!” Steve countered. You shrugged.

“I don’t need to. I’ve seen guys like him before.” you frowned.

“They all think the same. The only thing they think about is trying to get in girls’ pants. He got just a little famous and now he thinks he’s the shit and that his opinion is the only right one. always acting like he’s the best,” You scorned.

“That’s quite an assumption to make considering you barely know anything actually about him.” The blonde hesitated before saying the next part. “He’s really not too bad,” Steve combed his hand through his hair. You couldn’t stop the puzzlement that crept onto your face. Steve had never been one to be hypocritical.

“Oh, so you know everything about him?” you said sarcastically.

“Well, actually…” Steve rubbed his neck. “...he’s kinda been my best friend since we were kids, so I know a fair bit about him.” That caught you off guard. 

“Wait-- what?” You sat there dumbfounded for a minute.

“How come this is the first time I’m hearing about this?

Steve gave you a  half-smile.

“Well, you know, I didn’t want to scare you off or anything.” He let out a breathy laugh.

“You’d be surprised at how many people have completely blocked me out because of him.” Steve tapped his pointer finger as he awaited your reaction.

Man, this boy is dumb.

“Stevie, you’re literally the only one who talked to me after I first moved here,” You recounted. 

“Even though I don’t like Barnes, you couldn’tve scared me off if you tried,” You promised. “Seriously.” You looked at him.

 “And you’ll never get rid of me ever again,” you joked. The blonde gave you a relieved sigh.

“Now back to me being mad at you.” You quickly reset from that surprise heart to heart. 

“You should’ve told me!”

“Well it’s a bit late for that now,” he teased. A chuckle bubbled from your throat. You thought for a moment.

 “Just as long as I never have to talk to him, I’ll be fine,” you said light-heartedly. At this statement, Steve looked rather alarmed. You looked at him questioningly.

“What is it?” you asked.

“Is there paint on my face or something?” Steve looked at you rather guiltily.

“Hey, so I sort of did something,” He said cautiously.

“Yeah of course?” You started to get anxious. 

“I kind of expected you to respond positively to the Bucky news and I may have…” Steve trailed off.

“What?”

“I may have already invited him,” Steve said sheepishly. You looked at him with a face of pure panic.

“Oh, shit—I mean—that’s not too bad?” You bit your tongue. 

“As long as I have enough time to prepare,” You tried to convince yourself, but judging from the blondes’ expression, there was more to it than just that.

“When’s he coming?” you asked.

When Steve didn’t respond you asked again in a much more urgent tone.

“Steve, when's he coming?”

“So, yeah, about that too, um-“ Steve stuttered.

“he’s supposed to come right about… now.”

Before you could kill Steve, scream, and/or faint there was another jangle from the entrance. You looked towards the door. 

An extremely attractive man sauntered in from it. You observed his piercing baby blue eyes and dark, shaggy hair was cut just above his built shoulders.  You could tell he went to the gym from his bulky stature but most of him was covered by a cliche snobby scarf and a black, long leather jacket that probably costs more than your rent and we’re talking New York prices. There was a little stubble on his sharp jaw that framed a cocky smirk. Your breath got caught in your throat. As you took him all in, you knew you’d be lying if you said this wasn’t the goddamn most gorgeous boy you’d ever seen. Even if you hated him with all your heart.

Steve stood up to greet the man with a hug. 

“Hey man, glad you could make it,” Steve pat him on the back and the brunette returned it. Your friend turned toward you with his hand on the stranger’s shoulder. 

“Y/n-” Steve hesitantly continued. “-meet Bucky.” You were pretty sure you were having a panic attack. But somehow you still had coherent thoughts.

So this is Bucky? you wondered. He’s so much younger than I thought he was. In complete honesty, you always imagined him as a 100-year-old with a swirly mustache so a mid-twenty-year-old was quite a surprise.

You somehow composed yourself and said, somewhat politely, “Oh, uh, hi, pleasure meeting you. I’ve...heard a lot about you.” You wiped the paint off your hand before extending it to Bucky. He looked down at your hand. His eyes glanced back up before ignoring your hand completely, instead, he put his hands on his hips. You put your arm down awkwardly.

“Pleasures all mine, doll,” he flirted. A blush tinted your cheeks pink. You recoiled.

Who does this guy think he is?

Before Steve could stop him Bucky continued.

“Stevie, why didn’t you tell me how beautiful y/n is? I would’ve straightened up a bit more.” You knew it was a line, but to say you weren’t slightly charmed would’ve been deceitful.

Snap out of it, you told yourself. You had met too many guys just like him, and relationships with them always ended the same. Heartbreak and an unhealthy amount of ice cream, you thought bitterly.

“Bucky, don’t flirt with her,” Steve scolded. Bucky winked.

“I’ll try my best.” The blonde rolled his eyes but Bucky didn’t acknowledge it.

“So, this is the place you wanted me to come to?” Bucky said scanning the room. 

“Yeah, it’s a really great place, and really accepting,” Steve complimented.

 “‘Thought you’d like somewhere lowkey to get away from your-- you know,” the blonde-haired man said tentatively. Bucky rubbed his neck trying to mask his uncomfort at this topic. He quickly changed the subject, going into full critic mode.

“Hmm, the architecture’s okay,” Bucky evaluated, walking around a bit. “Did you choose the lights?” He looked directly at you. You felt his gaze burning into you.

“Uh, yes, yes I did,” You stammered out. The brunette hummed judgmentally. 

“Ideally you would’ve had completely white lights evenly placed throughout the ceiling. I assume it’d be a tad difficult to draw from reference accurately here.”

You mumbled something about fixing them while you played with your fingers insecurely. Generally, you had pretty thick skin, being in the art industry, but when Bucky Barnes tells you he doesn’t like something, it needs to go immediately, lest you become a laughing stock for the rest of your career.

“Mr. Barnes, could I give you a tour of the studio?” you offered. Bucky blinked.

“Of course. Lead the way.” He gestured for you to go forward. You pondered for a second.

“Follow me.” You proceeded to start walking around the room planning on pointing your proudest achievements out. Before you could say anything though, Bucky stopped dead in his tracks.

“This easel is at a 70-degree angle when the rest are at 90.” You honestly didn’t know what to say to that. He continued, “For maximum efficiency, I suggest making them all the same.”

You narrowed your eyes a little. This opinion seemed a bit nitpicky for you. He was supposed to be mainly judging your art anyway, not your fucking angles.

 “I’ll make note of that,” you replied curtly. Luckily, it seemed your wish for him to critic your art was granted as his eyes moved up to the painting Brock had made you drop earlier. Your heart dropped.

“Huh.” He looked at it with revolution. 

“It’s rather smudgy, don’t you think?” Bucky said looking over it. “Crisper lines create more appealing products. An artist of your age should know that by now,” He said demeaningly. You wanted to defend yourself and tell him about how it wasn’t your fault it was so smudgy but you knew better. Art critics hated excuses.

Before the brunette could make any more comments about your less proud works you spoke again.

“I’ll show you the supply closet.” You suggested. Bucky nodded. You walked to the closet door, opened it, and flicked the light on.

“Honestly this is probably my favorite part of this place. It has everything you could possibly need.” You looked at the brunette for his opinion. He nodded again but didn’t say anything. You were surprised he didn’t have any comments considering he had a lot to say just a second ago. You were getting suspicious that he wasn’t listening. You crouched down to reach a basket.

“I keep my favorite and most used supplies right here, though I’m sure you have your own preferred materials. Do you have any suggestions?” you asked expecting him to recommend some other brands or criticize your choices. When you didn’t get either you turned around. Bucky was staring at something in the previous room. As you followed his gaze you realized it was not a something, but a someone. The Infamous Bucky Barnes you didn’t like too much, to begin with, was really beginning to piss you off. 

“Uh, ahem?” you cleared your throat with only a hint of sass. Bucky snapped out of his thoughts.

“Oh, hmm? What’d you say? Sorry, I was just admiring your uh- organization.” Haha bullshit, you thought. It took all your strength not to call him out on his blatant lie.

“I asked if you had any suggestions for supplies.” He still looked distracted. Like he wanted to get this done already. He rapped his foot impatiently.

“Everythings fine,” Bucky replied lazily. Before you could say anything he spoke again.

“Hey, who’s that?” he said pointing to the person he’d been ogling earlier. You bit the inside of your mouth to stop from scoffing.

“That’s Sharon. She’s a regular artist here.” You said professionally trying to keep from saying something about Bucky catching a case. Said man smirked.

“Could I speak to her? I’d like to...learn about how things are run here.” His voice clearly indicated that was not what he was going to talk about. Avoiding Bucky’s line of view you rolled your eyes farther than you thought they ever could.

Guess the rumors were true. He is a womanizer, You thought to yourself. I can’t believe I actually thought I might have a chance. This is just how he is with everyone. Your ideas of him being interested in you flew out the window.

“Yeah, sure. Go right ahead,” You said in a tone that was just controlled enough.

You sighed as he left the closet with a click of the door. Before exiting yourself you gently hit your head on the wall a few times. This jackass of a man was really getting under your skin. You decided to just go back to your painting and hope he noticed it. As you walked back to your seat you caught a glimpse of Bucky leaning on a table near Sharon clearly chatting her up. You grimaced. 

They say never meet celebrities for a reason, you thought to yourself.

When you sat back in your chair, Steve gave you a sympathetic look.

“I know he was a bit of a jerk but he really isn’t usually like that.” Your blonde friend eyed Bucky. “I don’t know what’s gotten into him today.” You didn’t reply.

“Hey,” Steve said, trying to get your attention. You looked at him expectantly.

“He’s really not that bad of a guy once you get to know him.”

You couldn’t help the snort that came out.

“I’m pretty sure I don’t wanna know him enough to get to that point.” You knew you were being a bit harsh, but a bad day plus this was really amping everything up.

“I mean he’s an art critic,” you said exasperated. 

“but he only reviewed one of my pieces!” You humphed.

“He does everything for a reason.” He muttered. You picked up your brush again unconvinced. Steve seemed to notice as he resumed. 

“Really! Please just promise me you’ll give him a chance.” When you didn’t budge Steve gave you the puppy eyes he knew you couldn’t refuse. You groaned and dipped your head back in frustration.

“Fine,-” You grumbled. “-but know, it’s not for him, it’s for you, cause I trust your judgment.” 

I mean I’ll never see him again anyway, you thought.

Steve grinned.

“And that’s all I can ask for.” You and Steve fell into a comfortable silence for around an hour as you both worked on your projects, but the constant flirting you heard from Sharon’s corner was riling you up.

You made a sound that was definitely some sort of growl and threw your hands up.

“Why can’t they just shut up?” Steve smiled mischievously.

“You doing okay there?” You glared at Steve

“What do you think? Barnes is basically throwing himself at Sharon. it’s so distracting.”

“You know what it sounds like to me?” The blonde man beside you asked.

“What?”

“It sounds like someone’s jealous,” Steve whispered. You could physically hear the grin in his voice.

“I really want to hit you right now,” You threatened.

“That’s not a no!” he sang.

“I’m NOT jealous! Why would I ever want Bucky Barnes to flirt with me? I’d honestly rather die,” You denied.

Steve looked at you skeptically.

“Whatever you say.” He went back to his sketches. You huffed and ultimately did this same. 

You did NOT like Bucky Barnes. But as you looked back towards the playboy brunette talking with Sharon, you felt an ache of envy that he wasn’t talking to you. 

I do NOT like Bucky Barnes, you repeated to yourself. But a little part of you knew that wasn’t true. You put your head in your hands.

Well fuckity, fuck, fuck.

so that was part one! it’ll get more dramatic soon! this is my first series so i’m still trying to figure some things out. if anyone has tips please let me know! sorry for any grammatical errors. thanks for reading :)

series masterlist~part 2

[unmanageable-day]

11. Between a friend and another friend

When you are friends for so long, and it has never come across your mind to date one of them. Until one particular guy friend of yours came to offer you a relationship, a new chapter of life like no other before.

prev | next

After a few days, your mind was getting a lot clearer not thinking too much about Taeyong. You just hoped Doyoung and the other guys can somewhat help him to get a grip of himself. The effect of Hyemi being not around more than one week apparently was unexpectedly serious. No one could ever imagine he would try to find a way to you.

You were waiting for good news from Doyoung about that particular friend. Yet it seemed the information you had been waiting for wouldn't be heard in the near future. Doyoung kept saying it was difficult to see him as he perhaps were avoiding meeting either you or your dear fiancee. Frankly speaking, you were on the edge of giving up trying to make Taeyong understand. So was Doyoung actually.

There was one thing that had been disturbing Doyoung, which he had been denying it himself. That one moment when Taeyong got him triggered. These past several months since you said yes, he found it pretty lovely. It was just your usual friendship but obviously with different feeling. He enjoyed being with you more than he thought, yet he was being lowkey being so obvious about it. It just felt right choosing you to share moments in Doyoung's entire life. Did he unexpectedly catch feelings and fall for you? If he really did, and if he ever told you, he wondered if you would react the same like you did to Taeyong.

Doyoung was reminded of his own words to Taeyong back then. He remembered how Taeyong got hysterical pointing at him, saying how he didn't love you like Taeyong did. Doyoung didn't even argue and defend himself. Instead he acknowledged Taeyong's words. He really admitted he didn't love you, just like Taeyong said. Screw it, he thought. If he has to be a hypocrite, then let's be it.

"May I have a word?" he asked as he pulled over the car right in front of your gate.

You nodded as you unbuckled the seat belt, so you can turn to face him in a more relaxed position.

"About us... I know we started all of this without romantic feelings to each other. You also heard me when I chose you to be the first and the last. But I would like to learn to love you deeper, not as friends anymore, but you, Choi Jooyeon as a woman. The only woman in my life, after my mom, of course."

Your hands went towards your mouth as you gasped dramatically on purpose. Your eyes were sparkly but it didn't necessarily mean you were excited to hear it from Doyoung. You were more on the teasing mood and he realized that right away.

"Hey, I mean it." He playfully hit your forehead. "I hope you don't mind. And I kinda hope that you could do the same?"

You smiled as you gently grabbed his hands. "I'll try. As long as you don't rush anything."

He beamed back at you. "Well, they say love comes when you're used to the person you're spending time with. It's like picking up a new habit, don't you think?" He was right, you had to admit it. You didn't spend that much time with him. Even this relationship you were going to engage with for the rest of your life was odd, and somehow it reminded you to a fake dating scenarios, perhaps growing genuine love out of it wouldn't be a bad idea at all. Love does need time to grow afterall.

Furrowing your eyebrows, you pretended to disagree. "What? But you do realize that learning to draw as a new hobby is not the same like living with a new person for the rest of one's entire life, right?" you teased.

"I will pretend that you get my point." He chuckled. "Anyway, I have something for you."

"Ooh, present? I love present." You blinked to show your excitement.

Doyoung maintained his grin as he took a small box from his pocket. "Open it," he said, offering the box before your face.

Still smiling as well, you pursed your lips as you eyed him. "Even if it's only a keyring, I promise I will treasure it," you joked before you opened the lid.

A crisp of small laughter escaped Doyoung's mouth. He was anticipating your reaction when you see inside of the box. Although it was nothing fancy, he hoped you could see his genuine intention.

"Here goes." You added your own drumroll BGM when you took off the box lid. And that was when a gold necklace with little ornaments of moon, sun, and stars was exposed, instantly catching your attention as your eyes were sparkly looking at the jewelry. "Uwah, Kim Doyoung..."

"Pretty, right?" He looked proud of himself. "I got your taste right, didn't I?"

"Acknowledged," you admitted as you gave him a glimpse and approval smile before looking back at the necklace. "I've been looking for this stuff because I have matching rings and earrings, you know?"

"Of course I do. You've been babbling about that ever since," he responded proudly. "Come closer. Let me put it on."

You nodded, grinning as you took off your scarf. Then Doyoung proceed to loop the necklace on your exposed neck as you made a low ponytail with your hand. The smell of your perfume and your shampoo penetrated his nose, making him slightly nervous as if it was the first time being this close that it felt somewhat intimate.

"Done."

You flipped your hair gently. "Thanks, Doyoung."

"Thanks to you too, Jooyeon," he muttered gently. He flashed you his softest smile as he took his time to lock his gaze at you. For the first time, he ran his fingers on your hair, brushing and tucking it behind your ears. A rapid heat instantly crept up on your cheeks along with your racing heart.

Doyoung kept on leaning in his body towards you, placing one of his hands on your head while the other one was on the car seat supporting his body, to a some point that you felt uneasy and nervous as well. He made you unconsciously leaning backwards, until you were already at the end of the car door and your back stuck against the door. "Do-Doyoung?"

"Hm?" he responded, with his smiley expression fading out. He looked contemplating of what he was doing, yet he kept getting closer.

When your noses brushed against each other, somehow it was a cue for you to close your eyes, grit your teeth, and hold your breath at the same time in panic. That was also when he slowly kept going forward and eventually connecting your lips that lasted for only 3 seconds. He broke the kiss quite abruptly yet he didn't pull himself right away. Instead his face was still there, less than 5 cm from yours. You both blinked shyly and was unable to make proper eye contact. Even you almost forgot how to breathe.

"I-it's okay, right? I.. I'm doing okay, r-right?" he stuttered as he blushed.

"Why are you asking that? You just make it weirder and even more awkward." You faked whining as you tried hard not to stutter as much. You didn't want to look embarrassed although you could feel your cheeks getting a natural reddish blush.

"Was it terrible? But, you see, you know it's not my first time. I can do better. I know it's not your first time either. I just..." he started talking fast as if he was rapping. You didn't know what to respond so you just froze there, pursing your lips. When you thought he was going to pull himself away, instead he leaned in again. You were taken aback and you wished you could jump out of there.

"Can I try one more time?" he boldly asked, half whispering. He must be supressing his embarrassment and throwing away his awkward self.

You widened your eyes as a sign of internal screaming. You got flustered so much and it was even more embarrassing that he tried to explain himself. Moreover, asking for another try. He was definitely out of his mind.

"Let's give it a try in another time," you suggested as you shoved him away with a very gentle movement.

"Oh, yeah, right. No rushing. Sorry." Doyoung immediately retreat and sat straight. Several loud inhales and exhales were slipped off of his mouth, seemingly a way to cool himself down.

[ckret2]

“You’re so vain” “Give em hell kid” And “I hope you die” I’d love to hear those explanations

Righto! Okay so recap for the people who might have missed it, this is about the radiosnake playlist I mentioned/linked a bit over a week ago, Serpentine & Demonswing. When I posted it I also added an “and if you wanna know why any songs are on the playlist you’re free to ask.” The playlist is a work in progress so some of my answers are gonna be “so here’s the explanation for why it was included but tbh I’m not 100% on keeping it.”

Important things to mention before getting into it: the playlist is build specifically off my headcanons from “Cold Day In Hell,” and so all of the songs act on the assumption that CDIH is “canon.” (tl;dr: they’re exes, because Alastor got scared of emotional intimacy, told Sir Pent he never actually liked him, and ran off after blowing up all his airships.) The first chunk of songs is from Sir Pent’s perspective, the second chunk is from Alastor’s, the third is from them both or about them both, and the last few songs are “I like the vibe but honestly am not sure this fits the playlist.”

Also, y’all are welcome to keep asking me about songs, because this is a lot of fun.

I’m absolutely sure that tumblr is going to delete this read more out of the post but I’m going to put one anyway, maybe it’ll let this one work just to be contrary. If it doesn’t, I apologize for the dash stretcher, that’s just how tumblr do.

So! Explanations:

You’re So Vain (Lyrics)

This one is on the Sir Pentious side, so, although it’s not directly/accurately about Alastor, it is about how Sir Pent sees him in light of their catastrophic breakup.

Verse 1 is less on the nose in its description of Alastor, but you get the impression of someone who is obsessed with how he comes across to other people, and who is far more interested in himself and the image he’s giving off than he is in any of the people he’s trying to impress. A great deal of Alastor’s personality is—or at the very least, comes off as—completely performative. As though to this day he’s still nothing but a radio host performing for a listening audience, even when he’s only talking to one person. The fact that he’s always wearing a fake smile and pointedly providing his own sound effects adds to that impression of a performer who never breaks character.

And the fact that the character in the song is still wholly self-absorbed even when he’s dancing with a partner gives a nice little glimpse into how Sir Pent’s retroactively reinterpreted his last evening with Alastor.

Verse 2 is the stanza that comes closest to completely accurately reflecting what went down between them. First, the alliance between them, the implicit promises that they the were going to conquer Hell and then Heaven as partners in crime—“Well, you said that we made such a pretty pair / And that you would never leave”—and then, the breakup—“But you gave away the things you loved / And one of them was me.” It’s the one line that acknowledges that the character in the song did, indeed, actually love the singer, and wasn’t just performing a role/playing at being in love.

It’s also a line that would ring false to Sir Pentious, because in the aftermath of CDIH, he genuinely doesn’t believe that Alastor ever loved him. He completely buys Alastor’s claim that he was just screwing around with Sir Pent’s emotions for his own entertainment. Words to the effect of “one of [the things you loved] was me” would never come out of Sir Pent’s mouth.

However. Of all the lines in all of the songs in Sir Pent’s portion of the playlist, that one line is the most accurate thing that could be said about Alastor, the blade that would stab into the core of who he is and the role that he played in this story. Because of his vanity—his selfishness, his pride, his obsession with his own independence, his fear of love, his fear of vulnerability, his fear of sharing his life with someone else, etc.—he didn’t just lose what he loved, he did very deliberately and intentionally give it away.

(I’ve always found that line to be the most interesting in the song, for the hint that this vain person did indeed truly feel for someone else, so I’m glad that line fits so well here.)

Verse 3 is just more “what Alastor is like as observed by Sir Pent,” except even more accurately than the first stanza. Constantly running around, constantly moving on from one brief source of entertainment to another (just stuff “threw his support behind the Happy Hotel” somewhere between “gambled on a horse race” and “watched an eclipse”), constantly socializing with dangerous people and people whom he’s going to hurt without caring in the slightest.

Okay so that’s the lyrics.

Making sure the aesthetics/styles/genres of the songs match the character they’re for is one of my high priorities on this fanmix—not to the extent that having the wrong style is an instant dealbreaker, but I’m going to be hesitant to include a song that doesn’t at all match the sound I’m going for. For Sir Pentious, I’m kind of running with two styles.

The first style is “sounds Victorian-ish enough to get a shrug and a nod from anybody who doesn’t actually know/care about Victorian-era music,” so that’s gonna be just about anything orchestral/symphonic that doesn’t clearly fall into a different genre, symphonic metal that sounds symphonic enough to satisfy me, instrumental covers of other songs (string quartets, piano, full orchestra...), things with harpsichords (LISTEN i know that harpsichords are more baroque but they’ve got the right Vibe, you know, they’ve got the Feeling), and things with organ—but like, it’s gotta sound like pipe organ (pipe organ—sounds like a church) and not like Hammond organ (Hammond organ—sounds like a baseball game). Also steampunk, except a lot of “steampunk” genre music sounds swingy/jazzy, so those songs get ruled out because that’s Alastor’s aesthetic. And also, like, actual classical music, but I’m not into a lot of actual classical music, so I don’t think any’s actually made it in yet, lmao.

The second style is based on what the creator herself said about Sir Pent’s music preferences: “Sir Pentious would listen to Blink-182. Pentious would literally listen to stuff like Linkin Park, Green Day, the emo stuff.” So I took "the emo stuff” as “oh okay cool so the stuff I listened to at 15 got it” and ran wild with that. I’ve been most heavily drawing from My Chemical Romance, Panic! At The Disco, and Mindless Self Indulgence to represent that half of Sir Pent’s preferences. (MSI because I feel like that fits an in-your-face and morally jaded villain, P!ATD because their newer stuff fits his flamboyance and exuberance and egotism, and MCR because... because I know them best.) I haven’t yet made much time to carefully comb the discographies of the other bands listed or look into other more traditional emo-associated acts.

Carly Simon’s original “You’re So Vain” matches neither of these styles.

I combed through about 60 different versions of “You’re So Vain” on Spotify looking for ones that meet one of these aesthetics. Like 90% of them were, I’m pretty sure, just various singers adding their vocals directly over a karaoke version of Carly Simon’s original.

In the end, the only one that came close was Marilyn Manson’s cover. He’s a bit outside of the bounds I try to stick in for Sir Pent, but like, okay, he’s industrial metal, but in a particularly goth way, that’s close enough to emo. To my mind, “Sir Pent listens to emo” is like... Sir Pentious’s musical preferences are going to be, 1) counterculture, the kind of stuff that causes conservative Christian moms to go into moral panics, but also 2) mainstream counterculture, the kind of bands that produce huge hits & get featured in major blockbuster movies, but also also 3) slightly dated mainstream counterculture, i.e., at the end of the 2010s he’s listening to the bands that may still be popular but that peaked in the mid 2000s, in keeping with the way he’s trying to keep hip and modern but always seems a little bit behind.

So, in the 2010s, he’s listening to 2000s emo acts. In the 2000s, he was listening to the 1990s’ biggest metal acts (like Marilyn Manson) and possibly grunge acts (things like Nirvana, Smashing Pumpkins). In the 1990s, he was listening to the 1980s’ biggest post-punk and new wave acts (like The Cure, Joy Division/New Order, Depeche Mode). Always evolving his stylistic preferences, always trying to keep up, but always a little behind. So that’s how I justify putting Marilyn Manson in lmao.

Although that was the only version of “You’re So Vain” I thought fit well enough, I also found a version by Trash Pour 4, a version by Les Reed Orchestra, and a version by Giant Sand that were all very good. Trash Pour 4 is driving me crazy because I can’t quite figure out what genre they are, I just can’t place them—but they’ve got several other good covers that I’d like to take advantage of at some point.

I also found a song called “You’re So Vain (Christian Dior)” by The Energy Commission that’s not a cover of Carly Simon’s song, just a new song with the same name. I’m lowkey considering including on Alastor’s side of the playlist. It’d serve as a very sharp critique of how image obsessed Sir Pent is, there’s some snappy turns of phrase that seem like they’d appeal to Alastor’s sense of humor (my two favorites are “He went off the deep end ‘cause he’s so shallow” and “He’s got a timepiece on his wrist and it says ‘watch me’”), the fact that it’s a critique specifically of high class materialism fits with the fact that I headcanon Sir Pent as coming from British nobility while Alastor’s ancestry is both racially and socially mixed (including at least one close relative who was a slave, I’m thinking a grandparent but haven’t settled on my headcanons yet), and I love when there are parallels like that in playlists about the relationship between lovers/partners/rivals/siblings/any-combo-of-two-people.

The reason I haven’t added it yet is because, by the end of the song, it’s not just a critique of being a rich shallow image-obsessed douche, but specifically of how that culture ties in to exploitative capitalism that’s wrecking human lives and the world—which, in the context of the characters we’re talking about here, would translate into a criticism of Sir Pentious’s very-imperialist-sounding take-over-the-world villain ambitions. Which isn’t something I think Alastor cares about. He probably should, but like, he just doesn’t. He’s a villain himself. I’m sure he’s got his own morals and standards and hard limits but “take over the world” isn’t on his list of dealbreakers. What’s taking over the world include? Mass murder and subjugation? Yeah, he’s cool with that. So that’s why I’m still on the fence about adding it.

Give ‘Em Hell, Kid (Lyrics)

So remember how I said that My Chemical Romance is one of the bands I’ve drawn from most heavily so far in looking for emo Sir Pent songs? Yeah for about a day there were six different MCR songs sitting in Serpentine & Demonswing as I slowly whittled them down to the ones that I thought fit best. “Give ‘Em Hell, Kid” is one of the last three, and actually one that I’m constantly on the verge of cutting.

Lyrically, it’s an Alastor song. There’s mentions of the singer having come from New Orleans (listen... i am a sucker for songs that mention New Orleans, it automatically earns five points on the imaginary “is this an Alastor song?” rubric in my head). The singer is singing about a love interest who’s gone, and he’s making no moves to pursue/reclaim the love interest, wishing them well (“So go on, live your life”), but he’s a wreck and a lesser person without them (“If you were here, I'd never have a fear,” “Well I'm a total wreck and almost every day”), and it’s just getting worse with time, not better (“But I miss you more than I did yesterday”).

The line “Some might say we are made from the sharpest things you say” although directed toward “you,” i.e. the love interest, i.e. Sir Pentious, in my head actually reflects more on the things Alastor said to Sir Pentious: the cruel things he said to Pent—that he’s weak, ineffective, behind the times, a has-been, never going to conquer hell—ended up a self-fulfilling prophecy, because that’s exactly what Alastor’s rampage made happen. Today, as he is now, Sir Pentious is made from the sharpest things Alastor said.

“Your dreams and your hopeless hair” makes me think of Sir Pent’s wild efforts to conquer hell (and, of course, his ridiculous cobra hood), and “We never wanted it to be this way for all our lives” is a perfect expression of Alastor’s regrets/remorse over what his actions have done to both of their lives, but especially to Sir Pent’s life.

And all the references to violence—murder scenes, firing squads, sharpest things—fit with the fact that both of them chose to live lives soaked in blood.

So it’s a perfect Alastor song. The only problem is, it’s an MCR song, which is sooo far outside of my acceptable genres for him. (I’m not gonna get into Alastor’s genres now bc there are better songs to do that on, just know emo ain’t it.) And not only is it outside of his acceptable genres, it’s in the OTHER character’s acceptable genres, which is very messy. I can vibe with “lovers’ songs borrowing from each other’s aesthetic” a LITTLE bit when it’s used to represent, like, emotional synchronicity or the like (ex: both “Roustabout” and Vernian Process’s “Maple Leaf Rag” are on my “Alastor+Sir Pent style fusion songs” list). But MCR is a big departure from Alastor’s acceptable styles.

Plus, the playlist already has two MCR songs, and do I really need three songs from the same band? Unless there’s a really good reason, I try to avoid having repeats from the same band on one playlist—I feel like a good well-rounded fanmix oughta have a diversity of sources. (With “a really good reason” being something like “I’ve got the playlist divided into five sections detailing five phases of the character’s life and each section is introduced with a different track from the same band” or “I’ve got an instrumental version of the song to kick off the playlist to serve as ‘foreshadowing’ for when the version with lyrics shows up at the most dramatic moment” or something like that.)

If I was going to, like, make it a thing, I could. Justify it like “there’s one MCR song that represents them when they’re together, one MCR song from Sir Pent’s perspective, and one MCR song from Alastor’s perspective, like a little triangle,” but like... if I was going to do that I feel like I’d want to do it with a style that’s either representative of both of them or else independent of both of them, and MCR is so heavily a Sir Pent sound. Basically, having three songs from one band would be okay if it was a band that vibes with the overall tone I’m shooting for in the playlist—but it’s not. So I’m very torn on “Give ‘Em Hell, Kid.”

“El Tango De Roxanne” + “Overture” + “I Hope You Die”

Okay before I can talk about “I Hope You Die” by itself, I kind of have to explain its exact position in the playlist and its relationship with the other two songs I just listed.

While MOST of the playlist is chunked up into the four sections I mentioned earlier (Sir Pent, Alastor, both, undecided), within those sections the songs aren’t really in any particular order. The one exception is the very first three songs on the playlist/the very first three songs in Sir Pent’s section.

These three songs, presented in that order, all as Sir Pent songs, serve as Sir “in war, the side remembered is the side with the most style” Pentious the Super Villain making his big entrance like:

“El Tango De Roxanne” starts slow/quiet, and then (with a couple of brief dips) it gradually builds in volume and pain and intensity, getting faster and more emphatic, switching from mournful longing to nearly-angry anguish, until it ends with a pained scream, steampunkish percussion, howling background singers, and a wailing violin.

And then it pauses, for just a moment.

And then “Overture” hammers you with the most dramatic opening chord you will ever hear on an organ in your life, perfectly matching the energy at the end of “El Tango De Roxanne” and maintaining that level of energy throughout the song.

And then it stops so quickly it’s like someone gasped, holding its breath for a split second—and then some dude yells “You must die! I alone am best!” and the guitars kick in for “I Hope You Die,” leading into a depiction of the most intense, vitriolic, disgusting sort of loathing imaginable.

The build-up from “El Tango De Roxanne” and “Overture” really revs up “I Hope You Die,” the intensity of the organ in “Overture” highlights the intensity of the guitar in “I Hope You Die,” and all together it hypes up what could have been just a dark humor song about hating someone into something that sounds like a very genuine demonstration of hatred.

And taken all together, it makes for a fantastic intro for Sir Pent.

It also serves as a perfect intro to the current state of affairs between him and Alastor—sort of expressing his personal emotional journey on the morning Alastor betrayed him, as his reaction transforms over the course of three songs from grief/despair to fathomless fury.

There’s more I could say individually about “El Tango De Roxanne” and “Overture,” but I won’t, because it’s “I Hope You Die” time.

“I Hope You Die” (Lyrics - warning for a whole stanza dedicated to hoping someone gets raped in prison)

A small handful of the songs in my Hazbin playlists were discovered in and added from existing Hazbin character playlists I found on Spotify before I started making my own. “I Hope You Die” was one of them, found here. Which is why it was added even though it doesn’t fit my strict genre standards, it won me over before I narrowed down the styles I’m working with lmao.

(I feel like “El Tango De Roxanne” was one of those too, but I can’t now find a Spotify playlist containing it that added it before I did. Where did I grab it from? It’s not something I would’ve looked up on my own, something must have inspired me. IDK what though. None of the other songs mentioned in this post were found on other playlists.)

So this song is, obviously, just about how much some dude hates somebody else and wants extremely horrible things to happen to them. It’s sorta... *eyes lyrics uneasily* ... sorta tasteless; but, tasteless in a way that I feel like reflects back on the character singing the song. The feeling I come away from after finishing the song isn’t “the band wants you to think the person they’re singing about deserves this to happen to them,” because it doesn’t even give a reason why the singer hopes this person suffers; but rather, “the band wants you to think that this is the kind of hatred that the character/persona the singer is portraying is capable of, this is the kind of vile stuff that character wants to see done to their enemies, this is representative of the depths of that character’s rage.” Which is why I’m like “yeah... okay, sure, that fits” even though I’m real iffy about the last couple stanzas.

Because for a character who’s in Hell surrounded by people who have stomped on the last dredges of their civility and decency, and a character who’s patterned after a super villain (and, because the series creator dropped the idea that there are heroes/villains in the living world, the only super villain in this setting), and a character who gleefully boasts about being evil, and a character who we know demonstrates very rapid/extreme emotions and expressions of hate/outrage... Yes, I can absolutely see this song as the exact sort of hatred Sir Pentious would level at somebody who’s slighted him. And Alastor blew way the hell past “slighting” him. Alastor, without exaggeration, has ruined his life (afterlife?) and over fifty years later Sir Pent is still unsuccessfully struggling to get back up to the level he was at before he even met Alastor. Right now, Sir Pentious really and truly and deeply despises Alastor.

A song like this—sheer, frothing, unrestrained, vengeful contempt—tells you a whole lot about what kind of emotions Sir Pentious is capable; and it tells you a whole lot about the kind of effect Alastor’s actions have had on him, to inspire this level of reaction from someone who was very close to him for fifteen years and increasingly in love with him for probably a good amount of that time.

Plus, the “You must die! I alone am best!” is such a very, very Sir Pentious sentiment.

So that’s those songs! Again, y’all are free to ask me for my thoughts on more. Yes, most of them will probably be like this, lol.

[remuswriting]

Sugarawa x Remus self-ship ‘hcs’

List of questions can be found here

I am sad and needed something to help cheer me up, so I did this.

You’re totally welcome to ship us if you’d like.

1. Where was your first date?

All of my first dates I’ve gone on were out to eat and were so boring because the energy was so awkward.  I planned all those dates, so he probably took control over this one.  We probably go on a picnic date in a park that I really like.

2. Who normally plans the dates?

Him 100%.   We were definitely friends before we started dating and he knew I’d get overwhelmed and just make napping a date

3. What type of dates would you two mostly go on? Do you guys have a “date spot” ?

We like to do pretty interactive dates, so ones where you’re not sitting in a restaurant.  Maybe going to bookstores and picking each other out a book.  Or maybe movie night but we go to a movie rental shop to get the movie, popcorn, and candy.  Our ‘date spot’ isn’t really definitive, but we probably end up going to the park the most.

4. What kind of date do you think the both of you would enjoy together the most? Why?

Interactive dates like I said above.  I know all dates are quality time with someone else, but ours kind of intensify it.  Our dates require us to be more alone together, even in a bookstore we end up back together in the end and then maybe go read at our park.  Just spending time together outside of the house and also being alone at the same time.

5. How do you think your friends would feel about them being your bf/gf/partner?

I actually asked my best friend this question because she also watches Haikyuu and she said she’d be shocked.  She’d be extremely happy for me, but shocked that I managed to actually talk to him.  My other friends would be okay with him; he and I are pretty similar, so they’d think it was a good match.

6. How do you think their friends would feel about you?

I think Daichi and Asahi would like me because we were already friends before. I’m not sure who all he stays close friends with after high school, but I doubt any of the Karasuno boys would hate me. Noya and Tanaka may be very wary of me because they obviously love and care about Sugawara.  Kageyama and Tsukishima would literally not care, because it’s not their relationship.

7. Who would most likely help the other study when they’re struggling in a class?

He would definitely have to help me.  Struggling in a class doesn’t really mean I’m bad in it but that I just can’t concentrate.  I am shit about math and science, but I could make pretty good grades if I was able to just focus on studying.  Suga would definitely help me focus though, because studying with other people always helps me.

8. How would you know them? ( ex: same homeroom, same route to school, etc.)

I’ve put so much thought into this.  It would be freshman composition 1, which means we’re freshmen in university.  I’m sitting alone, way too early to class because it’s the first day, and Sugawara decides he will sit next to me, even though there are tons of empty chairs. He decides to ask me what I’m doing on my computer because ‘you’re typing a lot’ and I tell him I’m writing. Every day he asks me to tell him a new thing about what I’m writing, and we end up pairing up for a group project and become friends.

9. What do you think your first impression of them would be?

Definitely ‘holy shit he is so pretty, why is this really beautiful guy so pretty’ and then he talks to me and I’m really trying to hold in my gay panic because ‘even his voice is pretty, I have never seen a man as pretty as this one.

10. What do you think their first impression of you would be?

Probably thinks I’m shy (I’m kind of am but not really) and thinks it’s cute how flustered I get when he starts talking to me.

11. Who’s more awkward in the relationship?

Me.  I’ve been in a lot of relationships, but they were all disasters, so I’d be pretty awkward because I’m not exactly sure on what to do.

12. Who initiates verbal affection more?

Me.  I’m not very touchy, even in relationships, and my love language is heavy on words of affirmation.

13. Who initiates physical affection more?

Suga.  I think he’s more into PDA to show his love.  We’d probably come up with a compromise, because I’ll do PDA but physical touch cause me a lot of anxiety at times.

14. Who gets more embarrassed by verbal affection?

I think we’d both get embarrassed when receiving it, but he’d also get embarrassed when saying it while I wouldn’t.  Even though verbal affection is my love language, but I still get embarrassed when receiving it (attention can make me embarrassed in general); I’m super confident at giving it.

15. Who gets more embarrassed by physical affection?

Me.  I’ve already said it can give me anxiety and that’s the main reason why I’d get embarrassed.

16. How well do you think your music tastes would mix? Would they like the music you listen to? Would you like the music they listen to?

I have absolutely no clue. Sugawara doesn’t seem like the kind of person who listens to sad music on repeat.  He’s into more of Disney and anime openings/endings.  I wouldn’t have any problems listen to what he listens to, I just hate country music.

17. Who is the one more likely to keep the other in check? ( ex: keeping up with studies, making sure the other isn’t skipping class, etc.)

He definitely always having to keep me in check.  I struggle with depression, which has made me skip 3 weeks of class before.  His way of keeping me in check would be to schedule breakfast/lunch dates on campus, so I feel like I have to go to class to tell him about my classes.

18. How similar are your personalities?

We’re pretty similar. He’s more affectionate than I am with people.  I come off as pretty aggressive and cold, but I do care about those around me.  So, we’re both fairly caring and like to help others, but we’re both extremely chaotic.  I’m pretty sure I’m more chaotic than he is.  He likes to ensue chaos amongst people while I’m the person who sits in the middle of campus at 2am and campus police have to ask if I’m okay.

19. How compatible are your mbti’s?

I’m an INTP and he’s an INFJ.  I looked up the compatibility and it says it’s pretty strong.   I’ll just believe the internet. 

20. How compatible are your zodiac signs?

I think zodiac signs are really stupid, so I don’t really care about this one.  I’m a Taurus and he’s a Gemini.  I have like 3 friends who are Gemini and we get along just fine.  I think personality type is more important than zodiac sign.

21. Who would be the tattoo artist and who would be the florist?

Neither.  Sugawara is a barista at the only coffee shop that serves gluten free lemon cake near campus.  I’m the creative writing major, who is working on his huge project, that comes in every day he works.  I also definitely messed up my order the first time I saw him.

22. How big is the height difference?

           He’s 5’8” and I’m 5’1” so seven inches.

23. How would you describe your first kiss?

I’m going to let you guys in on a little secret; all first kisses suck.  Never base if you’re going to date someone because of a first kiss, because it is always awkward and lowkey sucks.  Our first kiss would be awkward, we definitely knocked noses and he had to grab my face to kiss me.  The kiss itself wasn’t bad, the entire experience was awkward though.

24. Would you confess first, or would they? How would it have gone?

Sugawara confessed first because I literally don’t know how to.  He was at my apartment studying while I was writing and I asked if I could read out some dialogue for him because I didn’t know if it was any good. He then just said “I really, really like you” and I was like “Cool, I like you too, now can I read out this dialogue?

25. Do you think they’d be good at your love language?

I have multiple love languages, I tied in all three of these; Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, and Acts of Service.  They end up tying into some of my mental illness, so they all really make sense for me.

I truly know that he would be good at my love language(s).  Spending quality time together is already a common thing for us and we tell each other we love each other all the time.  He praises me when I do good on things and just makes sure I know he loves me.  Acts of Service isn’t a love language that I am always in need of.  It’s mainly for when I become depressed to where I can’t really function like I typically do, and he helps me where he can.  When I need that type of love language, I don’t really want any words of affirmation because it causes me to feel guilty.  But him coming over (or home) and cleaning up the place before laying next to me and telling me about his day is something that would mean the world to me.

26. What do you think their love language is, and do you think you’d be good at it?

I firmly believe this man’s love language is physical touch.  I would do my best at it.  I may not do it all the time, but there would be times I would just know to do it because he needed it and that’s all that matters to me.  Over time I think I’d get better at it, but it could take years for me to get to a point where I was ‘good’ at it.

27. Why do you think they fell for you?

I don’t 100% know.  I know we’d be good friends, but something probably happened to make him realize he liked/loved me.  It was probably something of he was sad and texted me he couldn’t come over, but I ended up at his doorstep with his favorite food and his favorite chick flic saying that we were going to have the best night ever.

28. Why do you think you’d fall for them?

I fall extremely fast in relationships, it’s really sad to be honest.  He would make me laugh and happy.  Suga would definitely be supportive when I come out to him and told me he’d never see me differently no matter if I was trans or not.  Him being so accepting would probably make me fall in love with him.

29.  Are there any songs that remind you of your self-ship?

Please Notice (Christian Leave), Into You (Ariana Grande), Lethal Combination (The Wombats), Enchanted (Taylor Swift), Dazed & Confused (Ruel), Sucker (Jonas Brothers), Come Back…Be Here (Taylor Swift)

 30. Are there any cliché tropes that apply to your self-ship?

           Friends to lovers is the only one I know of.  I don’t know a lot about cliché tropes.

31.  Who would prefer cooking? Cleaning? Baking? None of the above?

Sugawara would prefer cooking while I prefer baking.  Cleaning would just be something we do together because we both have certain ways we clean things and have to work together on.

32. Who takes really aesthetic, elegant photos of the other?

We take turns in a way, but mainly me.  I hate getting my photo taken, so I’m taking majority of the photos.  He takes really elegant photos of me when I’m not paying attention though.

33. Who takes very unexpected, unflattering photos of the other?

Both.  We’ve made it into a competition of who can get the worst one.  I’m winning with the high quality people where I’m sitting on his seat, my eyes/forehead in the photo, while he looks atrocious because of the angle.

34. How would your (future?) careers work together? Would your schedules clash, or sync well?

I truly hate this question, because I don’t know what career I’m going to have.  I’d love to work in a publishing house, so we’ll go with that one.  Sugawara is an elementary school teacher, as you may already know because of time skip. Our schedules alignment would change pretty regularly depending on the project I have, but I’m always home to tell him to go to sleep and he can finish grading papers in the morning.  He refuses my help on grading because he says I’d be too intense on third graders.

35. Who would suck at games?

I’m assuming this means videogames and I straight up just don’t play any video games.  I’m pretty good at board games (besides Monopoly because I’ve never played it) and would destroy him at Clue.

 36. Who would let the other win at games?

Neither.  We’re both pretty competitive.  He gets pissed because I keep winning at board games when I barely even pay attention to the game though.

37. Who is messier?

Me.  I’m the kind of person that has a clean room before I wake up and suddenly it’s destroyed because I got ready.

38. Who would propose? Would either of you want marriage in the future?

Sugawara would 100% want to get married, but I’m pretty hesitant because of my past relationships and just view on marriage as a whole.  I’d most likely marry him, but that would be a huge talk.  He’d also be the one to propose and it was a huge proposal where we literally go to Disney World to do it.  I later tell him that he could’ve asked me while we were watching Bones and I would’ve said yes.

39. Where would your dream vacation be with your self-ship? What would you guys do?

Disney World and Universal Studios.  I want to live out my dream of getting the photographers of me kissing my boyfriend at Disney World and buying Hogwarts stuff at Universal.  He’s 100% a Slytherin and I’m a Hufflepuff with Slytherin tendencies, aka best pairing.

40. What are traits you have that would annoy/upset them?

I’m severely pessimistic and lazy.  Being lazy would annoy him, but I imagine that my pessimism would eventually piss him off.

41. What are traits they have that would annoy/upset you?

I don’t really know. He seems to be the kind of person that just does everything constantly, and it would annoy me.  He doesn’t know how to take a break and relax, which I do way too much of but that’s because I do a lot of stuff at once and then I relax for however long I can.  Suga doesn’t know how to do that though.  It would just be annoying; it wouldn’t upset me.

42. How often would you guys probably fight? What would they normally be about? Would they be big or small?

I don’t think we’d fight that much, but that’s because I ever get upset enough to actually fight. Sometimes I yell and tell people to actually listen, but that’s the extent of my typical anger.  Our fights would probably revolve around unhealthy habits. Probably tells me to stop being pessimistic and I try to explain it’s not that simple, and soon enough there’s a fight.  He definitely starts them because I think he’s so much more open about everything he feels compared to me.  We never insult each other or anything though, even if it’s a nasty fight.  The worst it has come down to was “I don’t want to see your face right now, I’m leaving” and I end up sleeping at a friend’s house.  The next day we calmly talk through it and the fight is done.

43. Who would probably get sick more often? Who would baby the other when sick? Who acts like they’re dying when they get a stuffy nose?

He definitely gets actually sick more than I do because my immune system is really good.  I tend to not feel good when I’m depressed, I have actually ran a fever because of it, but I’m not actually sick.  I don’t baby him at all.  My mother is a nurse and the most I was babied was when I was really young and had a severe case of the flu, besides that she sets out medications and tells us to drink water and sleep.  I would buy him soup (I have caught soup on fire before) and really cover him with blankets to make sure his fever goes down.  I act like I’m dying when I get a stuffy nose though and he just asks my mom want to get and buys it for me.

44. Who has the worst patience? Does the other balance this out?

I have the worst patience out of everyone I know, except my mother (where I got having no patience from). Sugawara has a lot more patience than I do because of being in volleyball and has to constantly tell me that we will get to the counter eventually when I complain that the line is way too slow and my version of Hell is waiting in a line.

45. Which one suggests trips to stores at 3am?

Me. No one is there that late, so it’s the perfect time to go.

46. Who is a morning person? Who is a night person?

He’s a morning person and I’m a night person.

47. Out of the two of you, who would be the one to kill / get rid of the spider?

Me. Spiders don’t bother at all.

48. Who reminds the other of things? ( ex: appointments, tests, etc.)

Sugawara has to remind me of everything.  I am overly forgetful and he tells me the night before as well as text me before the appointment.  He thought in the beginning of the relationship that getting calls the day before my appointment would truly remind me, but they don’t.  I forget what floor my doctor’s office is on and I’ve been going there for years, so remembering appointments is just extremely hard for me.

49. What is the pace of the relationship? ( ex: started dating after a few weeks, takes months/years, act couple like right off the bat, need time, etc?)

I’m not sure if I fully understand this, but he and I were friends for probably months before we started dating.  I may have liked him longer, but I’m used to guys not liking me back.  He probably liked me for a month and then awkwardly confessed.  We immediately started acting a couple once we started dating though.

50. Who said the first “ I love you”? Was it immediately reciprocated, or did the other person wait?

He said it first.  It slipped out when he was lying next to me on one of my bad days and was like “I just love you so much.”  He didn’t even freeze, at all, and I was pretty quiet because I wasn’t in the mood for talking to begin with.  I said it later when he brought me food, and he almost broke a plate in shock.

[bagof2780teeth]

The Story of My Crush and I

Yes, this is gonna be a very useless lesbian story about me and my crush.

No, I'm not exaggerating with uselessness. I really am that useless and that much of a clueless bottom.

So hold on tight and follow this rollercoaster of emotions (I might promise too much, but idc, just read it)

Oh, and also, I can and will advertise this as butch x femme bc she's like,,, the butch girl of your dreams and I am the emo femme.

We met because of a mutual friend (let's call her A). So A and I were online friends but luckily we only live like 1h by car or 2 by train apart so she invited me to her birthdays where I met her friends and also my crush. I think we knew right from the beginning that everyone (except for A) is gay. Same interests in music, tv shows, whatever, I get along with A's friends very well. Which is great. Obviously.

I don't know at what point I started crushing. But I knew that on the second birthday party of A I was invited to we were playing truth or dare and I got to choose who I want to kiss. I wanted to say my crush but I was too awkward so I got to kiss A herself and another of her friends. But not my crush. Later that year (it must have been the same year) A, my crush and I went to the cinema together to watch Love, Simon, it was summer. I lowkey hoped for some kind of arm/hand touching action, you know? But yeah, nothing happened, but crush and I always looked at each other when you could see some reference to panic at the disco (brendon urie our lord and saviour). That's that. About 1.5 years ago now.

I possibly had some kind of "relationship" of two weeks with a boy, I regret it. I never wanted my crush to know, bc I still wanted to have a chance. Yeaaaah, let's just not talk about it.

About one year ago, A set crush and me up on a "date" (apparently we both were complaining that we wanted a girlfriend.). I think it was around that time when I told A that I actually have a crush on my crush.

So we went to a Christmas market, we were just walking around, at some point we got chips and she was like "I'll pay" and I died a little. Yeah, that's the most "intense" it got, no holding hands or anything. Pretty disappointing, right?

I think the next time we met was my Birthday party. She and A stayed over night because of the distance so it's just less stressful. I actually was invited to her birthday party as well but my (not anymore) best friend decided to have hers on the same day so I thought since I was closer with my best friend, her party was the right decision.

Crush is literally one day younger than me, btw.

So since A's birthday is also in the same month (march, my people, it's insane) A's party was the next time we met. And again all of the other friends I already knew. At some point crush taught me some kind of dance figure (discofox) so our hands touched, wow so intense, she has very soft hands.

At some point, again, truth or dare, but it was just crush, me and one of the friends (the one I got to kiss a year prior). I had to say whom I wanted to kiss if I had to and I was like "ehhh, I don't mind, really", but obviously, I was just too insecure to say my crush's name.

A and my crush both came to see my school's musical (obviously I was in it). When they talked to me afterwards A hugged me in a way that felt like she was trying to lift me up. Since she's smaller than me I was like "are you trying to lift me up?", said it in an ironic way. My crush then said let me try and yes. She did.

A also mentioned that my crush first thought about getting flowers for me but since they had to drive for a while she didn't and I,,, did crush really think about that???

Time went by.

Crush and I only communicate via snapchat.

When I was on holiday she texted me something like "we should meet again when you're back, I miss you" and I, slight gay panic, responded probably "same" and something saying that we should meet!

And we did. We met a couple of times so I'm not really sure what happened when and first or whatever. But I think it was the first meeting (or date???) When we went to a nice roof top bar (it was summer. Summer of 2019) and again, she said she'd pay. So we sat there for a while, talking about... anything, gay things.. casually.

Later we got food (pizza. Pineapple pizza, we both love it and if that's not a sign....) and after being too awkward to ask for the bill we somehow managed to get it and the waitress placed it in the middle of the table. Why am I mentioning that?

So. Before that happened my crush said that with same sex couples it's a "thing" that whoever gets handed the bill is the top. At least in the eyes of the person handing you the bill.

Let's just say that I really have no top energy and the waitress only put it in the middle bc I already had my wallet out.

Btw. I paid. I said we'd pay together and that I'd pay. Most top energy I've ever had in my life.

Later on we were just sitting at the riverside, talking. Eventually it started to rain and we ran somewhere to not get that wet. Yeah. Funny. It really was funny.

About a week later (I got a cold bc we sat in the rain. wow), when we were snapping, she mentioned that she finally found some friends to go swimming in a lake with (it was a really warm summer week) and I was like "oh, lucky you, I don't have anyone to do that". Guess what she did? She invited me to come as well. A and some of the other friends I know were coming, so that was fine for me. Of course my dumb ass lesbian self said yes and the next day I spent two hours on a train to get there.

That was a Wednesday. On Thursday I'd have my very last oral exam in school (graduating is fun n stuff). Why's that important? Well, I made some more poor decisions that day.

When we were like.. done with swimming the plan was to drive to my crush's place to have some kind of bbq. A and I wanted to go to A's place first to shower. On the way we figured out it would be more convenient for me to head directly home because of my exam the next day and how the trains run. I texted my crush what was going on and she was like "you could sleep over at my place and go home tomorrow morning" (my exam was around 2 or so). Of course I said yes. She then asked me if I wanted to drink something specific (there is this certain brand of sparkling wine she knows i love and got it for me).

So we then spend the evening sitting in my crush's garden. I had the whole bottle of sparkling wine for myself since I was the only one liking it/not having to drive. My crush had beer, so that's fine. After all the other friends left we we're just sitting alone, outside, in the warm summer night, talking, sitting in silence (not that awkward kind). At some point she suggested to star gaze when it got dark enough. So guess what? We were lying in the grass next to each other, looking at the night sky and making up names for random star constellations. When it got cold she got us some of her jackets.

Eventually I was slightly drunk since I didn't eat much and drank the whole bottle and I maybe ended up asking her how obvious me having the crush was. Well. Let's just say that my subtweets aren't as sub as I am.

Yeah, so that was the last thing we talked about before sleeping (ofc i had to borrow some of her clothes). Awkward? Maybe. But not really, since nothing changed between us. She knew.

I think the next time we met was when we went to get new piercings together. Chaotic energy, very spontaneously. It was fun, I don't regret anything. I can't remember anything worth mentioning that happened.

So since I graduated this year my live obviously needs to go on. I'm doing a gap year, as an aupair. So I did some kind of "good bye party" with my closest friends before I left.

My crush was invited as well. So, first, she brought me a bottle of my favourite sparkling wine. Then, (I was really stressed) she told me to breath, calm down, or sit down and if I remembered it right she did make gestures that I should sit on her lap? Anyways, I didn't, I had to do something else.

At some point that day we were all sitting on the sofa, me next to my crush. She said something like "my arm hurts" and placed it around my shoulders and then said "oh look how smooth that was". Yeah, I died.

She helped me doing the dishes at like 3am and we talked about random things.. maybe some more "private" things.

A few days later she explained to me how she felt (Text. Not in person, do we look like we aren't socially awkward?). She told me that she really wanted to give me a clear answer but she really can't say if she has romantic feelings for me or not. Like she can't say yes but she also can't say no.

Unrelated to that thing I texted her and asked if I had a chance (I was prepared to get a clear no, so I could stop crushing, you know) but she told me that I do have a chance. Why are lesbians so bad in those things.

Yeah, then, I went abroad. We still snapped pics to each other. She told me (multiple times?) she'd come and visit me if she had enough money.

She on day told me that she had been to a nice veggie restaurant and said that we should go there one day (I'm vegetarian).

When I was sure that I'd come home for christmas I told her and we planned to meet. The idea was there but to actual plan what we wanted to do.

In the meantime we started to do almost daily "good night" snaps and suddenly she started to include a heart in her good night message to me. Eventually I did so too and now we almost every day send each other a picture saying goodnight with a drawn heart on it. You wouldn't do that if you knew the other person has a crush on you and you wouldn't want them to have this crush, would you?

And also she really isn't a person to use much emoticons, certainly not hearts.

So now the plan is that I come over to her place on new years eve (which is tomorrow.)

She said she'd look forward to it and I am literally dying of gay panic and excitement.

Additionally, you know those things on Twitter "@ the xth person, it's your whatever" yeah. People did that with "@ the 6th person is your new years kiss" guess who that person is for me? Literally my crush's Twitter. Eventually I did post it with a "lol" (ironically.) and she responded to it with this smirking emoji. You know which one. 😏. That one.

Yeah, that's pretty much the story. I am a gay mess. If she finds this, I'm dead. Well. Anyways, I'll have another 6-8months abroad when I go back so what could go wrong. Haha. Ha.

I'm way too lazy to check for typos and I might have not included every single detail, but you get the broad idea.

Thank you for your attention, I'm out (what a pun).

TL;DR: lesbians being the useless lesbian cliche, I still don't know if i had a chance