#I’ll probs delete this and the other post when I can post again | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

chibicalzones · 4 years ago

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𝐚𝐨𝐛𝐚 𝐣𝐨𝐡𝐬𝐚𝐢 𝐝𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐭𝐞𝐚𝐦

⋆° where you transfer schools and join your new high school’s dance team!

...these are also just my personal headcannons if the volleyboys were a dance team instead in which some may or may not be from personal experiences :D

i was gonna do a fukurodani one first cuz @myhaikyuudump ‘s post triggered smth in me but i’ll probs make this into a series!

warning: mentions of bullying but it’s not explicit

post made by: alex 🍒

— oikawa

he’s been part of the school’s dance team ever since he was a freshman, which not many can do, and now since it’s his last year, the coach granted him the role as dance team captain

he loves being captain if that means he can boast about his team that much more, plus he takes his duties pretty seriously

is literally the type to put “aoba johsai dance team” “ajdt 2020” “dt for life” in every single one of his socials - instagram, twitter, facebook, etc. everyone needs to knows he’s on dance team

as much as he loves his team, they’re more known for and primarily train in hip hop, and he’s part of the handful that is classically trained in ballet

so when competition season rolls around, everyone would be part of the large hip hop dance category that they’re a shoo-in to win, but oikawa and a few others would have to compete in the small categories with 3-5 people in jazz, contemporary, and lyrical. which are usually extremely competitive!

so he’s over the moon to have you part of the team! not only do you blend in with the team so perfectly, he believes that you’re what the team needs to finally win in a category besides hip hop since you’re hands down so talented!

that way, he can spend his time at nationals actually dancing and not just watching almost the entire time

out of all the members, you probably spend the most time with oikawa

you expect just as much because you’re both the in the same dances, which is practically every dance. but you honestly do enjoy his company since you and him have a lot more in common, have a similar childhood, than the rest of the members

oikawa used to dread summer practices and camps but you makes it so much more bearable

would drive you to and from dance practices every day

all the time that he spends with you, he secretly lets you in on the “behind the scenes” action on being an officer and what he does all year long

because he’s 100% sure you’ll be captain your third year as well

is secretly anticipating the national dance pageant so you and him can win Mr. and Ms. Dance together

— iwaizumi

he’s co-captain of the entire team but he’s like the unofficial hip hop team captain because oikawa sometimes can’t handle the energy during hip hop practice and iwai just knows the counts better

he only joined dance team because oikawa dragged him into it but he needed up really liking it by the end

has casually danced and took some classes over summer to fill his time before auditioning and the odds were in his favor

absolutely loves the friends that he’s made through dance team and is definitely the type to still keep in touch with the alumni after they graduate

he always gets a center moment in every single hip hop dance they do through the years whether it be for competition, concerts, rallies, events - people go wild whenever he’s center!

when you did some research on the school and it’s dance program, you did some snooping on the members page and after watching countless dance videos, he’s the first one that you notice

but meeting him in person was quite intimidating the first time. it took you a couple of weeks before you could actually have a conversation with him with just the two of you

since you hang out with oikawa during dance practices and oikawa hangs out with iwaizumi, you end up hanging out with him a lot too. so you eventually ease up to him

you may be comfortable with oikawa more, but iwaizumi is the one that constantly checks up on you

all these years, he’s seen what oikawa has been through and he sees that in you. he really worries for you because he knows how exhausting it is to be a new member and constantly having to work your way up so you can eventually fill the holes once the third years leave

always takes you off campus to eat lunch or go somewhere to eat after school so you’re energized for practice later that day

he’s the first to give you his number and makes it clear that you can text or call him if you ever need anything

— matsukawa

didn’t expect people to know him for dance team but he’s surprised he’s pretty famous around school

known for the tricks and flips that he does during all their routines

actually has really good musicality but whenever he choreographs a piece for the group, he doesn’t know the counts

talks so causally to the coaches as if they were friends but isn’t a kiss up

thinks summer practices are too tiring and offers everyone to go to his place after to cool off

strangely enough, you got along with mattsun faster than you did iwaizumi

when the team started to learn their large hip hop routine for competition back in the summer, you were having such a hard time learning the dance because your body just wasn’t used to moving your body that way

and you didn’t want to bother iwaizumi or oikawa because you knew they’d be too busy looking after the whole team

so during the group’s free time, he would play the music over and over again and practice the dance with you, carefully going through everything section by section

even gives you an extra key to the dance room so you can practice before school

you can always count on him for help on any of the dances you’re in together

yells the loudest whenever you’re on the floor / stage. even when he’s watching from the wings

always tries to make each moment of his last year fun!

— hanamaki

joined the dance team his second year but turns out to be an awesome dancer and makes friends oddly quick

one of the few that auditioned to be part of the smaller group pieces for compeitions and got in

gets a killer turn section and always squeezes in a triple to transition into the floor during improv

despite only dancing for such a short time, agencies have come in contact with him to see if he was interested in signing under their talent agency but he always resigns because that just isn’t for him

all the third years have a solo except for him because he didn’t feel like it was fair that he wasn’t a “third year senior” and that someone else deserves it more

like you!

is amazed at how gorgeous you dance and knows you’ll be gracing the floor with your talent, getting all those gold metals, plaques, and trophies!

he might be a little jealous over you but seeing you being so passionate over the sport makes him work even harder to make himself — and the team — better

absolutely does not and cannot tolerate other people’s bullying towards you. he just doesn’t understand how or why people felt the need to be rude towards you. and have the audacity to voice it out.

one time when he caught a group of dancers from another school talk bad about you, saying nasty things that obviously weren’t true, he snuck behind their back and said in a low voice, “you know those aren’t very nice thing to say” and looks down on them until they run away scared

also deletes any hate comments on the team’s official social pages before you could read any

the very first time you perform your solo, he buys you a bouquet of flowers to give to you afterwards

and then during the end of the year dance concert, he watches you from the wings performing your solo for the last time and he starts to tear up because he’ll definitely never forget this year where he was able to watch you grow

— kindaichi, kunimi, and kyotani

your #1 support group

and fan club!

absolutely loves watching you dance

they all joined the same year you did and they’re all slightly jealous of you because damn, how can someone be good at literally everything

it’s almost upsetting >:( but they love you too much to actually be mad

they just have such a deep appreciation for you and what you bring to the team as a whole even though they don’t show it that often

learns a lot from you

when they first watched you dance contemporary and ballet, that inspired them to practice extra after hours so they could be ready for when they have to audition for dances later on the year

the goal is that the trio will be good enough by the time their third year hits and they’ll be the ones on the floor with you performing all the small dances

ever since you guys first met at orientation, you were all attached to the hip in and outside of dance. basically on the same playing field for next three years in terms of fitting in with the team

you’re not in the same classes but you guys all study together at the library on sundays because that’s your only day off

one time, the team was at a competition the same day as your birthday and they paid the announcer to say something like, “happy birthday to our best friend, dance your heart out!” right before they played the music for your solo

and during their last year, they’ll all gather around in the wings as they watch you perform your senior solo for the last time and silently cry together because they’ll really miss you

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saltminerising · 3 years ago

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ngl, this blog and surrounding FR drama blogs have kind of made me afraid to... be myself, in FR communities? i'm worried i'm going to visit Tumblr one day and see a submission upon the lines of "did you see what peepee from poopoo flight posted on FRD?? so cringe." and yeah, i realize by saying this, people are prob just gonna tell me to avoid these blogs. but I'm too much of a sucker for dumb petty drama, and paranoia keeps me checking to make sure I'm not being talked about. sorry 4 long post

Don’t be sorry for long post, I’m sorry you feel like you can’t be yourself

If it helps, if anyone submits something *about you* that makes you feel any sort of way, I’ll always delete it when you ask. Barring some sort of actual crime or seriously offensive behavior, I don’t care if it has a million notes, I’ll yeet it.

It’s really hard to find the line with regard to posts about users themselves. I feel like on one hand, it would probably really suck to see something bad about you, which is why the option is there for us to delete it at your request. We also try really hard to not post dogpiles or harassment.

On the other hand, I feel like if we didn’t allow people to complain then there’s a void that can be filled be a blog that’s maybe unwilling to delete them, or something else upsetting. Then again, if anyone truly wanted to post hateful shit they can always go down one of the other online drama avenues. Running a drama blog is complicated if you try to come at it from an ethical perspective.

I hope that you do choose to be yourself and enjoy the game fully, and that if anyone does post about you, that you let me know so I can yeet it. 🥨💕

#salt asks

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skieswords · 4 years ago

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Sorry For The Wait {Charlie Gillespie x OC}

Summary: Alex is a lowkey youtuber, known for funny vlogs of her just existing. She’s avoided the relationship question for the longest time, but has decided it’s time to come clean to her followers.

Warning: Fluff, swearing, mention of alcohol, and sexual innuendo cause I’m incapable of writing anything without it.

Alex was wandering round the kitchen, in his old shirt and a pair of pyjama shorts that really didn’t cover much. She hummed an undistinguishable melody under her breath as she went about making her morning coffee, dancing to the song in her head. Charlie grinned from his position in the doorframe, leaning up against the wall with his arms crossed as he watched his girlfriend be her usual dorky self. She spun round suddenly, feeling eyes on her. “Oh, morning Char, when did you get back?” Charlie laughed under his breath and uncrossed his arms, stepping towards her and pulling her into his chest. “It’s not exactly morning, is it.” He nodded towards the clock on the oven that read 13.47, sighing when she shrugged and pressed a kiss to his cheek before stepping away to pick up her coffee cup. “It’s my morning.” Charlie rolled his eyes but nodded, helping himself to a banana from the fruit bowl, and leaning against the counter. Alex jumped onto the counter opposite, and swung her legs, sipping happily. Sitting there looking absolutely content, in his clothes and drinking her coffee, Charlie felt his heart swell. “I wanna go public.” He blurted it out, rather unexpectedly, for both parties. His eyes widened as he realised what he’d said, and looked down to his boots, still caked with mud from that morning’s not so sunny hike. “Didn’t we agree you’d stop wearing boots in the house? You hate vaccuming.” She jumped off the counter and made her way towards him, wrapping her arms around him and setting her coffee down on the countertop, resting her chin on his chest. He looked down at her with a soft smile, her blue eyes bearing into his hazel ones. “If you’re up for it, I’m down.” She smiled up at him, her voice soft and slightly excited. He pressed a kiss to her forehead and let his hand wrap around her waist, fingers drawing light patterns on her spine. “Yes please. I want everyone to know you’re mine.” Alex grinned and kissed along his jaw, until pressing a lingering kiss to his lips. “Okay. When?” She broke away from him and unwrapped some toaster waffles, pushing down the button on the toaster before making her way back into his arms. “Today. Fuck it, let’s do it now.” She raised her eyebrows at him, and fiddled with his chain nervously. “Have you checked with Kenny? Didn’t he say-” Charlie sighed and ran a hand through his hair. “Uh, Kenny gave me the all clear like 2 months ago. I just wasn’t sure if you were okay with it.” Alex rolled her eyes, and patted his head jokingly, stretching like a cat and moaning happily when her back cracked loudly. “Of course I am. Dude do you know how many videos I’ve got planned for when people know about us?” Charlie laughed and stood up properly, kicking his shoes off and frowning slightly at the mud that scattered the floor as he did. “Great, let’s get them all filmed. Go get changed though, I’m not taking you on live in them.” He indicated her shorts, reaching a hand round to grab her ass. “Hey, they’re not that bad.” Charlie raised his eyebrows at her, and pointed to the doorway. “Fine. But I’m not wearing a bra and you can’t make me.” He rolled his eyes and smirked, pulling his phone out and walking through to the living room, stopping outside their bedroom door and watching as she pulled her shorts down. He bit his lip and caught her eye, shooting her a wink, before settling onto the sofa, setting his phone up on the tripod.

“Hellooo, people. Okay, so I’ll just let some people file in. Sheesh, how many of you are there? That’s like 4000 already and it’s been like 10 seconds. Okay just a few more... Great. Hi everyone, uh, this is just a quick one to answer a question a lot of people have been asking me since the show came out. Before I do, I just want to say you guys know how much I love you, and how grateful I am for all the support, but I really need you guys to respect me with this. It’s something I’ve wanted to do for a long time, and I’ve only held off because I was waiting for someone to agree.”

From behind the camera, Alex emerged from their bedroom, her hair freed from it’s bun and falling around her shoulders as she fidgeted. She was nervous, having only been in front of an online audience of a couple thousand before, and she’d never been exposed to Charlie’s followers. They read the comments on his posts together sometimes, and she often stalked fan pages when she was bored and he was out hiking. The girls were crazy about him. Understandably of course, the man was gorgeous, and talented, and funny, and a million other things that had indeed made her fall in love with him in the first place. Kenny had asked that cast members (besides Jeremy, who already had a very public fiancée) to keep any relationships on the downlow, in order to keep the guys sex appeal up to fans. Alex had agreed, knowing it would help the show sell, and had deleted the few posts of Charlie on her instagram profile. None of them really made it look like they were in a relationship, and they were mostly group shots anyway, taken on day trips to Newfoundland, or on the beach with other friends. So her own followers, besides her close friends and family, had no idea she was even in a relationship. Still, it wasn’t fair to tease his fans, so she’d removed the posts all the same. Thinking of her instagram, she pulled her own phone out and took a picture of herself in the living room mirror with her tongue out, captioning it ‘head over to @charles_gillespie for an exciting announcement!’ before leaving her phone on the sidetable and grabbing her coffee from the kitchen.

“Okay, so we’ve waited like 3 years or something to do this. Guys, this is Alex. My girlfriend.” Alex walked into the frame and took a seat next to Charlie, avoiding eye contact with the camera. She wasn’t camera shy- she was a youtuber, it was second nature to her. But a bunch of batshit crazy fangirls? Terrifying. Charlie slipped an arm around her shoulders and made a show of bringing their heads together, plastering a silly grin on his face. His smile was infectious, and Alex mirrored it, sipping her coffee carefully before setting it down next to wear Charlie’s foot sat on the coffee table. “Knock that over and I’m kicking you out.” He laughed and kissed her hair, leaning forward to read the comments.

“OMG, it’s @alexmvlogsz!”

“I knew it, there are old photos of the two of them everywhere.”

“It won’t be serious, they’ve probs only just got together.”

“She’s defo with him for the fame.”

“He’s too hot for her.”

“I’m so here for this!”

Alex noticed Charlie’s frown and leant forward, reading them over his shoulder. “Ha, you guys are funny. Yes, hi it’s me, Alex. Yes, there are a lot of photos of us going around. Yuh okay you’re wrong, been together for like 4 years now I think? Also, we started dating while I had more followers than Charlie. So, uh go follow me because I’m cooler than him. Oh you are so right, he’s way too hot for me. And we are also here for this!” Charlie looked at her with an adoring smile, kissing her head again and pulling her into his side. “She’s hotter than me, actually. Anyways, this is Alex, love of my life. Just thought I’d share that with you guys.” Alex waved and laughed as a storm of comments came through, a combination of support and hate. “Okay, I’m gonna end it there. Bye y’all.” Charlie clicked the end button and collapsed back onto the sofa, frowning slightly. “People are so mean. Why can’t they just accept that I love you?” Alex shrugged and kissed him, moving to straddle his lap. “They will in time. But half of them are in love with you, they don’t want to accept it. It’s fine though, I’m used to it, don’t worry.” Charlie grumbled under his breath, leaning forward to rest his head against her chest. “Hey, while their all still on their phones, do me a favour and put a question box on your story for a Q&A video?” Charlie nodded and grabbed his phone from behind her, keeping one hand on her back so she didn’t fall. Alex yelped as he stood up, automatically wrapping her legs round his waist, and her arms round his neck. “What the fuck Charlie?” He laughed and wandered over to the same mirror Alex had taken her selfie in a few minutes earlier, holding up his phone and taking a photo of them. “For the story. I can post photos of you now, thank god.” Alex held on, resting her head on his shoulder as he typed behind her back, before tossing his phone onto the sofa and grinning at her. She raised her head and looked at him with her eyebrows raised. “Are you going to put me down now?” Charlie shook his head and walked towards the bathroom, arms wrapped around her. “I need a shower, and you’re joining me. “ Alex laughed but let him carry her, kissing along his jawline with a happy smile.

*****

Hair soaking wet and faces flushed, they collapsed into bed side by side, Alex resting her head on Charlie’s chest. “I have an idea.” Charlie looked down at her, and ran his fingers through the damp strands of hair. “We should call Owen over. We’ll do a Q and A, but he has to read out the questions, and if we try to answer wrong or something, he can reveal the truth. Plus he can throw in his opinions, and it’ll be funny.” Charlie laughed softly, and nodded, reaching over to his nightstand to grab his phone. He clicked on Owen’s contact, and facetimed him, pulling the duvet up to cover Alex just in time. “I didn’t mean ask him right now. But okay.” Owen picked up, and grinned into the camera as he saw Charlie. “Hey, I’m just heading out to do some stuff but I can speak to you in the car. What’s up?” Charlie didn’t speak, simply angling the camera so that Owen could see them both, Alex’s red cheeks standing out against the white of the duvet cover pulled up to her shoulders. His face fell when he took in her appearance, groaning and pulling his hat over his face. “Look, Charlie, I love you, and I tolerate you Alex, but I saw enough of this in Vancouver. Seriously man, she has no clothes on.” Charlie nodded, and smirked. “Yuh, and she’s staying like that for the rest of the day. Anway, she wants to talk to you.” He handed the phone to Alex and sat up, reaching over to grab Alex’s phone from the charger. Owen rolled his eyes and sat Alex on his car stand, turning the keys in the ignition, and starting to drive. Alex made sure the sheet was tucked tightly under her arms, before moving out of Charlie’s grip, and leaning against the headboard. “Okay, so I was thinking.” Owen grunted in response and raised his eyebrows, avoiding looking at her. “Never a good thing. Just saying, if you flash me it’s not my fault, and manchild over there can’t get mad.” Charlie stuck his middle finger up at Owen, not looking up from Alex’s phone, which he was spamming with selfies. “Yeah, whatever. Anyway. I was thinking, Charlie just told all his followers we’re together- just incase you didn’t notice- and I want to do a Q & A on my channel. I think it’ll be even funnier if you ‘host’ it, and you can throw in random stories and opinions and whatever? You know us better than anyone,” Owen laughed bitterly and leaned forward, looking out his window. “Yeah, unfortunately. God, I was so happy when you went home. Okay, so when do you want to film this?” Alex looked over at Charlie and smiled seeing him scrolling through her instagram feed. “I don’t mind, when you next free?” Owen shrugged, and the familiar ticking of an indicator came through the phone. “As long as you two are fully clothed, I’ll come over on Wednesday? I have to come to LA to meet some people anyway, we can grab dinner after?” Alex nodded and watched as Charlie set her phone down, and slid down the bed, resting his head on her stomach. She ran her free hand through his hair, smiling as his eyes closed at the sensation. “Yeah that works. I’ll see if Sav wants to come too. Okay, I’ll see you then.” Owen nodded and waved at her, smiling as she flipped the camera to show Charlie. “He’s such a baby. Okay, you two go do whatever you two do. I’ll catch you later.” Charlie flipped him off once more, not lifting his head from where it rested, and Alex hung up. “You want a nap?” Charlie groaned slightly, indicating yes. “Cool, me too. Let me get the blinds.” Charlie sat up with an incredulous expression. “You woke up like an hour and a half ago woman, how are you tired already?” Alex looked at him with raised eyebrows and pulled a shirt out of their wardrobe. His shirt, to be clear. He watched as she dragged it over her head and flipped the blinds so that the room was darker, and held his arms out to her as she climbed back into their king sized bed, cuddling into his warm chest as they passed out for a couple of hours.

*******

“Hey guys! Most of you will already know, because we announced it a few days ago, but for those of you who don’t, today I’m introducing you to my boyfriend properly! The incredibly hot Charlie Gillespie.” Charlie waved awkwardly to the camera from his spot on the sofa, looking to Alex who was on the other side, almost 2 feet of space between them. “We figured we’d do a Q and A, so you guys sent in some questions, and well, we’re gonna answer them. Also, we have another special guest with us.” Owen appeared, and sat in between them, grinning at the camera. “Wouldn’t be a show without me. Okay so basically these two are disgustingly in love, and have been for a disgusting amount of time. Alex is using me for clout, and now you’re going to find out all of the gory details about their relationship.” Alex smacked him gently and handed him Charlie’s phone, the question response boxes all ready to read. “Okay, first question.

How long have you guys known eachother, and how did you meet? Owen looked between them, and pointed to Charlie. “I want to hear him get this wrong.” Charlie rolled his eyes and leaned forward, looking at Alex, who nodded. “Okay. We met nearly 4 years ago, when Alex moved over here for college. I was in LA that weekend, and I bumped into her in the street. We got to talking, and I ended up taking her out that night. That was pretty much it if I’m honest, nothing that exciting.” Alex scoffed and flipped her hair behind her shoulders. “Not quite. I took him out, and he fangirled the whole time. His sister had watched a few of my youtube videos, and he- and I quote- thought I was really pretty.” Charlie stuck his tongue out at her, and Owen groaned, resting his head in his hands. “We’re only one question in and I’m already sick of the both of you. Okay, next question.”

Do you guys live together, and if so where? Alex raised her eyebrows and laughed. “Most of the time we live together, yes. This is my apartment in LA, and I’d say we’re here at least 8 months of the year. But at christmas we go to New Brunswick to see Char’s family, and we go visit my family in thesummer. And sometimes I’m in New Zealand, and he’ll go on holiday with his boyfriend here.” Owen grinned and held Charlie’s hand, resting his head on his friends shoulder. Charlie leaned into him, making them appear like a very loved up couple. “Yeah, so we live together most of the time, apart from when we’re visiting friends or family, or if he’s working.” Charlie nodded and looked to Owen, who continued scrolling through boxes. “Oh my god some of these are dodgy. Jesus, look at this one!” He showed it to Alex, who burst out laughing. “Okay, I’m answering that but we’re not reading out the actual question.” She climbed to her feet and turned side on to the camera, smoothing out her t-shirt against her chest, giving a decent view of her side profile. “Whoever asked what kind of man Charlie is, I’ll let you figure that one out for yourself. He doesn’t get a choice in the matter- I only have one of the above.” Charlie read the question over Owen’s shoulder, before frowning and reaching out for Alex, pulling her onto his knee. “Shut up, you’re perfect and I love every bit of you.” He started peppering her face with kisses, laughing alongside her. Owen jumped to the other side of the sofa, grimacing. “Disgusting. Okay, next question. Ooh, this one’s juicy.”

Alex, do you and Madison get along, and have you ever been jealous of her relationship with Charlie? Owen made a show of trying not to laugh, and Alex rolled her eyes. “Mads is like a little sister to me. We get on really well, and her and Charlie’s relationship is best friends, nothing more. I mean, to be fair I’d totally adopt her if I could. Having her living with me would me pretty cool.” Charlie frowned and shook his head. “No. I’m not living with the both of you. You’d never stop singing.” Alex nodded happily. “And the only thing I’m jealous of her for is she doesn’t have to live with him. Or share a kitchen with him.” Charlie flicked her in the side of the head, kissing the afflicted area shortly after, while Owen nodded in agreement. “That brings us nicely on to the next one.”

Who’s got the worst eating habits? Owen rubbed the back of his neck and looked straight at the camera. “I can’t believe I’m about to say this. Alex is worse than Charlie, folks. And you’ve seen how he eats.” Charlie pushed Alex off him and jumped up, pointing his fingers at her as he danced around in front of the camera. Alex’s jaw dropped, and she leant forward, pointing at Charlie accusingly. “He eats eggs with peanut butter. Do you know how gross that is?” Charlie grabbed her hand and kissed her knuckles, sinking back into his seat. “You eat ham, and peanut butter. You can’t talk.” Alex groaned and flipped him off behind Owen’s head. “Fine, what’s the next one?” Owen grinned and scrolled a bit, laughing out loud before putting the phone facedown.

Who’s most likely to get jealous? He smirked at the camera, and shared a look with Alex, who was grinning. They turned back to the camera and spoke simultaneously. “Charlie.” At his name, he groaned and grabbed a pillow, smothering his face with it. “Very much Charlie. Do you want to hear something funny? Of course you do. Owen, I’ll let you take this one.” Alex sat back, smiling smugly, while Charlie looked at her with pure betrayal written all over his face. “While we were in Vancouver last year, filming for the show, Alex here, came to stay with us for 2 months. This was the first time I’d met her, besides a few facetime calls. We got on really well, and hung out a lot on and off set, while I wasn’t filming. Our lovely Charlie, decided he was going to absolutely freak out about this, and started a fight in the middle of the freaking lot, in front of the entire cast and crew, because he thought I was after Alex.” Charlie groaned from behind the pillow, and Alex laughed. “He thought Owen was flirting with me, and yelled at him for a straight 7 minutes, while we just kinda stood there and looked at each other. I felt so bad, I took Charlie home that night and sat with him for like 3 hours, and then I took them both out for dinner the next night. It was weird.” Owen snorted and rubbed his forehead. “You did not just sit with him. I shared an apartment with you, I was in the next room.” Alex punched his arm, and leaned over to ruffle Charlie’s hair. “He’s just protective, you should see him when we go out together, he literally refuses to leave my side.” Owen nodded and smiled at Charlie’s flushed face. “He’s stupid protective of her. One of the crew members actually did flirt with her. We’re lucky the guy’s still alive.” Charlie rolled his eyes at them both and held his hands up. “I had to compete with an entire college full of guys to keep her. And I have 3 brothers. I’m used to fighting for what’s mine.” Alex smiled and stood up, pushing Owen into her spot and sitting beside him, taking Charlie’s hand. “Yeah, what he said. Next question Owen?” Owen shook his head and scrolled once more, raising his eyebrows occasionally. “Okay, this should be easy.”

Who’s the most annoying to live with? Charlie and Alex both immediately pointed to her, and Owen nodded his head. “Even just while we were in Vancouver, this girl drove me up the wall. I don’t know how Charlie does it.” Charlie smirked and rubbed his jaw. “He gets well compensated for his troubles.” Charlie shrugged and nodded, laughing at Owen’s expression. “She’s incapable of showering without leaving the entire bathroom flooded, she never does the laundry unless I phone her four times and ask her to do it, she has never touched the vaccum in her life, and the bed only gets made when she’s not living here. Not to mention she’s the messiest person in the world, and our room is literally carpeted with her- actually wait no, MY clothes, because she never wears her own stuff. Exhibit A.” Alex stood up and spun around, showing off her outfit of Charlie’s t-shirt and a pair of jeans. “He loves me for it though.” She dropped back onto the sofa, smiling as she felt Charlie’s arm slip around her waist and pull her in to his side. “Let’s do some nice ones.”

Are you guys morning people? All three of them laughed, and Alex buried her face in Charlie’s chest. “Owen, is like a late morning early afternoon person. I’m always up before 9, I like doing stuff in the mornings. I sleep in on Saturdays sometimes, or I’ll stay in bed and watch a movie with Alex. But Alex doesn’t get up unless she absolutely has to. Today she got up at like 1230 I think? And that’s early for her, and it was only after a lot of persuasion.” Alex bit her lip, remembering the persuasion Charlie had used that morning, and feeling a familiar heat take over her face. Owen pulled a face, also knowing what he meant, and gagged. “Disgusting. But yeah, I’ll second that. When she lived with us, we’d go home for lunch sometimes, or we’d have a halfday, and she’d still be sleeping. Like Charlie would go in and get her at like 4pm. And she’d wake up and go get coffee. At 4pm.” Charlie nodded, and Alex sighed, sitting up and brushing her hair out of her face. “In my defense, I’m normally up pretty late. I work best at night, and I can never fall asleep before like 3 or 4am.” She shrugged, and leant on Charlie, who was blushing ever so slightly. “We know, Alex, we know. Let me give you a piece of advice, folks. See if your best mate’s girlfriend comes to stay, after 2 months of being apart? Stay away from the apartment for at least 3 days. Maybe a week. Move out if you can. They kept me up, Every. Freaking. Night. I don’t know how Charlie was able to function at 5.30 in the morning, considering he could’ve gotten like maximum an hour of sleep. He was on vocal rest for a reason.” Owen raised his eyebrows at the camera, and Alex hid her face, while Charlie puffed out his cheeks and looked around, avoiding the camera. “Moving swiftly on, what’s the next question Owen?” The blonde grinned and scrolled once more, chuckling under his breath.

What’s your guys favourite thing to do together? Owen looked at them dubiously as Alex clapped her hands, and Charlie grinned. “Besides that.” Charlie rolled his eyes and reached over to clip Owen over the ear, and Alex ducked as they play fought over the top of her. Finally breaking apart, Charlie straightened his shirt and resumed his hold on Alex. “It’s between travelling and playing. With Alex’s family in the UK, and mine in Canada, we fly around quite a lot. Besides, we both love seeing new places, and we have friends all over the place.” Alex nodded and smiled excitedly. “I can’t wait, we’re going to see Mads for her 17th birthday next week- she doesnt’t know, but I won’t post this until we’re there, so it’ll be fine. And we went to visit my dad in New Zealand last month- that was fun. We went to Hawaii, of course, with Jer and that. That was incredible.” Charlie nodded, watching with an adoring expression as his girlfriend’s face lit up, while she spoke about the places she loved so much. “Hawaii was awesome, but I gotta say, going to the UK is like wow. It’s so different over there.” Alex looked at her feet shyly, nodding slightly. “For sure, and my friends are uh, very different from our friends here.” Charlie raised his eyebrows in agreement, feeling Alex’s grip on his hand get a little tighter. “But yeah, besides travelling it’s got to be playing together. We sing together all the time, I’m pretty sure our neighbours hate us.” Alex brightened up and laughed, nodding eagerly. “Honestly, most of the time that’s what we’re doing at like 1am. I’ll get a song stuck in my head and force Charlie to play it for me. He’s so much better at guitar than I am.” Charlie shook his head and held a hand out in excitement. “Nah, see when I tell you this girl can sing, oh my GAWD. There’s a reason I fell in love with her. And she plays piano, and guitar, although I am still teaching her that. And violin!! How cool is that? She’s teaching me. So yeah, our neighbours hate us.” Owen smiled as he watched his best friends talk about each other, the love between them so obvious and real. “Okay, we’ll do like two or three more.”

Who takes longer to get ready in the morning? Instantly pointing at each other, Owen laughed, and pointed to Charlie. “100% this man. She just throws her hair up and puts on whatever he wore the day before. This man has a full haircare routine, every fricking morning. Like seriously, it’s just hair!” Alex nodded in agreement, running her hands through Charlie’s hair. “It is very nice hair though. Nah for sure, Charlie takes longer to get ready first thing, but when we’re going out, it’s me. Like out out, I mean. I’m so indecisive. In Vancouver Savannah literally nearly stabbed me cause I was taking so long.” Charlie grinned and nodded, Owen mirroring his actions. “Never ask her to go out unless you have at least 4 hours to kill. 3 hours for her to be indecisive, and then another for her to be late.” Alex grinned and tilted her head to the side. “Girls, am I right? HA. I’m funny. Okay, moving on.”

Who’s most fun on a night out? Charlie and Owen pointed to Alex simultaneously, who just shrugged and nodded. “I was raised in Scotland, so when I drink, I drink hard. Nobody could keep up with me when we went out in Vancouver. Seriously, Charlie tried and we nearly had to take him to the ER.” Charlie scoffed at this, but the blush spreading up his neck said all that needed to be said. Owen laughed at the memory, and set the phone down. “No really, it was so funny. This tiny 5′5 girl knocking back vodka like it’s water, and Charlie’s trying not to throw up in the corner after like 2. This girl’s liver is deceased.” Alex grinned and kicked her feet up on the table proudly. “Proud drinker since I was 13. Shit, this is going on the internet. Okay, forget I said that. Owen?” Owen reached out and grabbed the phone, scrolling through again.

Do you have any tattoos? Owen rolled up his sleeve and showed off the ghost drummer on his forearm, and Charlie stood up next to him, placing their ghostly characters next to each other. They pulled their shirt sleeves down, and looked to Alex, who groaned and stood up. “I have a few, but they’re pretty small.” She came up close to the camera, followed by Charlie, who helped her pull the collar of her shirt down, and swept her hair away from the nape of her neck, revealing the small outline of a triangle at the top of her spine. “I’ve got that, and then-” She pulled her top up, and showed a single word written on her ribcage, in gaelic. ‘teine’. “It says fire, in scottish gaelic. And this one.” She held her hand up to the camera, showing a daffodil on the inside of her middle finger on her right hand. “And then I have another one on my leg, but obviously can’t show that.” She settled back onto the sofa, smacking Charlie when he laughed. “It’s hardly on her leg. It’s like-” She held a hand over his mouth and smiled at Owen, asking silently for the next question. “Oh wow, okay I like this one.”

Alex, how do you get along with the JATP cast, and who’s your favourite? Owen looked at Alex expectantly, who just rolled her eyes and crossed her legs. “I love them, so much. While Char was away I was constantly on the phone, and they’d just pass me around depending on who was filming. A lot of it was because Charlie was afraid I’d get lonely, but also because he was so busy that he could only grab a couple of minutes to speak to me every now and again. While I was in Vancouver, me and Owen definitely spent a lot of time together, and he showed me round the city while Charlie and Mads were doing perfect harmony shoots and stuff, which was an experience and a half. Note to self, Owen is incredibly competitive at arcade games.” Alex slipped her hand into Charlie’s as she spoke about her time with Owen, knowing he’d probably start overthinking it. “But Mads and I got super close. Like everytime the boys were filming we’d go to craft services and eat our weight in brownies. We made them a lot too, in the apartment. We literally facetime everyday. And Savannah too, oh my god I love that girl so much. She’s like my best friend. I wouldn’t have made it over there without her, she literally picked me up from the airport when someone forgot I was coming.” Charlie held his hands up in defense, and Alex rolled her eyes. “He didn’t forget I was coming, he just ‘lost track of time’. But honestly, I can’t pick a favourite, they’re like family to me.” She smiled at Owen, and leaned back against Charlie, meaning every word. “Aw. How cute. I’m the favourite. Next question. Oh wow, this is a biggie.”

Charlie, are you going to propose? Alex’s eyes widened, and she coughed, turning to look at Charlie. “Good question. It’s nearly four years. Where’s the ring, Charlieboy?” Charlie chuckled and ran a hand through his hair, leaning back against the sofa. “Got a while yet, got to train her up a bit better first.” Alex punched him in the arm, and he winced, rubbing it and glaring at her. “I’m joking, obviously. She’s only just 21, so we’re gonna wait a bit- but yes, I will. One day. If she doesn’t kill me with her cooking first.” Owen raised his eyebrows and brought a leg up underneath him, scrolling through the questions. Alex looked at Charlie with a pout, crossing her arms and moving away from him. “Oh my god, you’re such a child. Yes, I’m going to propose, just not now and not anytime soon! Yikes.” Alex grinned and kissed his cheek, waiting for the next question. “Right, we’ll make this the last one?” Alex and Charlie nodded, Alex tucking her legs up to her chest as she leaned back against Charlie, her head resting on his arm, which was thrown across the back of the couch.

What’s your favourite thing about each other? Alex smirked and looked Charlie up and down, winking at the camera. Charlie did something similar, his arm moving down the sofa and grabbing at her hip, making his intentions more than clear. Owen gagged, and spun round, holding his forehead in his hands and shaking his head. “Joking. I love Charlie’s passion. He gets so invested in the things he loves, and watching him speak about stuff he’s genuinely interested in and excited for is the cutest thing in the world. He gets these like sparkles in his eye, and he jumps up and down and god it’s adorable. I also like his abs. They are, in a word exquisite. Not to mention his arms.” Charlie rolled his eyes, but pressed a loving kiss to her temple. “I love how talented Alex is. There’s not really anything she can’t do. Literally, she’s musical, athletic, and she’s like stupid smart. She has a degree. From college. Like woah. And I also love when she gets super excited about something, or when she gets like really emotional- not sad, just when she’s feeling something really intensely, she starts like bouncing up and down in her seat, and clapping her hands or shaking them really fasr. It’s literally like the most adorable thing ever. And her ass. It’s pretty cool too.” Owen coughed and held a hand up. “Right well, there’s one thing she can’t do. She can’t dance. Like at all. It’s quite funny.” Charlie nodded, as did Alex. “Dancing, definitely not my forte. Also, when he says athletic, he means I played field hockey in high school and college. The most exercise I get now is when he’s hor-” Owen stood up quickly, and Charlie covered her mouth with his hand. “Okay, that’s all for this video! Hope you guys are suitably grossed out. Thanks for watching, goodbye!!!”

Owen turned off the camera, and Alex grinned before turning to Charlie, connecting her lips with his in a soft kiss. Finally being allowed to talk about her relationship was a major relief, after having to hide it for so long. “Gross, can you wait til I’m gone at least?” Alex rolled her eyes and flipped him off, climbing off the sofa. “No, cause we’re going out for dinner. Can you call Sav, baby? Let her know we’ll be like an hour?” Charlie nodded, watching her with a dazed smile as she wandered into their bedroom, already tying her long hair up out of the way for a hard session of outfit searching. “You’re in so deep with that one, man.” Owen looked at Charlie knowingly, who just shrugged and continued to smile. “What can I say. She’s the one.” Owen shook his head and rolled his eyes, but he was smiling, happy that another one of his best friends had found real love. Charlie scrolled through the contacts on Alex’s phone, clicking on Savannah’s name and raising the phone to his ear. He jumped when she picked up, holding the phone at arm’s length. “Oh my god, Sav it’s me, not Alex. She said to tell you we’re going out in a couple of hours, and to be ready to go for 7. That cool?” Savannah spoke rapidly on the other side of the line, agreeing and squealing with excitement when she heard Owen would be there. “I’ve missed you guys! Okay, see you soon!” Charlie hung up and set his girlfriend’s phone down, reaching for the remote, and turning on the TV. “Wanna watch the NHL?” Owen nodded, kicking his feet up on the coffee table, and looking at the clock on the wall. It was only half three.

#charliegillespieimagine #charliegillespie #charlie gillespie fic #charlesgillespie #charliegillespiesmut #jatpimagine #jatpcast #jatpimagines #jatpluke #jatpsmut #jatp #lukepattersonsmut #luke patterson imagine #lukepatterson #luke julie and the phantoms #julieandthephantomssmut #julie and the himbos #julieandthephantoms #julieandthephantomscast

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iampikachuhearmeroar · 3 years ago

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sometime in this last week, or this week coming, my blog has turned/turns 10. god. a decade old. a whole ass chunk of my life i’ve spent on this hellsite. when i began on here, i was a kid. a lost, lonely, depressed and anxious 15/16 year old kid. a kid scared of her future. a kid confused about her future. what to do for uni. to change schools or not??? to do drama/acting at uni or english/philosophy or to move 8hrs away to another regional uni to “escape” her “washed up, dead end hometown” that was so typical of all the pop-punk music that she was listening to at the time.

she was a tad overdramatic, loud, “funny” (as described by her school friends) and terribly forgetful in regards to homework and school assignments. she was angry at the world, most especially the catholic school she was fucking sick and tired of attending. but she was convinced that since she was the so-called “funny girl”, that she simply couldn’t be depressed or anxious. she believed herself unloveable because she didn’t look like a weird mixture of hayley williams and emo-pop queen lights. but now, i no longer believe that i have to look like the women that i looked up to in the ~emo scene~. fuck beauty standards. i am loveable.

in the years since joining tumblr, i’ve managed to get through business college, my undergrad degree and, well, failed out of postgrad due to obvious burnout and health issues amongst other things. although i’ve lost many friends irl and many followers/mutuals online on here. for those who’ve stuck around to see me get through all of this, thank you. to all the friends/casual mutuals that have since deactivated or only followed me for a short time then unfollowed; thank you.

like obviously i was never/have never been a massive popular blog on here, like thebootydiaries or vampireapologist (who has since deactivated a couple of months ago) with tens of thousands of followers. my follower count is still close to the 8,000 range at 7,892. obviously that’s still a lot of people (and of course, porn bots lmao and many, many non-active blogs), enough like one super old post from like 2012 tumblr pointed out, enough for a small to medium sized city or town, or something like that. i don’t know how many people i’ve really reached. i really don’t know how i actually amassed this small army of people.

i am aware though, that on other platforms like snapchat (lmao does anyone even use it anymore in 2021???)/instagram/youtube/tiktok etc, i’d PROBABLY be considered as some type of ~micro influencer (🤮🤮)~. hell, i actually had a bot slide into my notes about being one on here on this hellsite back in 2019. i don’t know if i’ve ever actually ~influenced~ anyone on here with my shitposts (when i started making some) or my personal posts. i don’t know my reach. even though, now, i do occasionally get featured on buzzfeed listicles (although pay me buzzfeed along with the OPs of those original embedded posts), i still don’t know how many people i’ve reached… and even with my very occasional checks of google analytics lmao. on top of this, grappling with the loss of followers at times is much, much easier than it was when i began on here and the first few years following that. i know that my follower count doesn’t determine my worth and stuff.

but over these 10 years, i have grown. i turn 26 this year. back in 2011, 15/16yo me never thought she’d be here. she was partially down the suicidal thoughts hole, with things about ~picturing her funeral and wondering who’d bother to turn up. if only she could pretend to be dead for a day to see who’d give a fuck~ and 16-18yo me was defs down it with her HSC hellscape thoughts in 2012/2013. that 3rd floor tafe/tech women’s bathroom window drop and the thought of scarring her class for life (and that cool dude from catholic school that she crushed on who ended up at tafe with her) with jumping out of it onto the concrete below. instead, she just posted on fb about ~being a failure~ etc which ultimately did lose her a bunch of facebook friends lmao. it was practically the same thing. her mental breakdown after the end of her hsc, where she let her earrings go green and get infected in her ears because “fuck self care, bc what the fuck is it??? i’ll never get better! let me fucking wallow in my self loathing bc it’s the only thing that i’m fucking good at!!!” so i no longer have my ears pierced. oh! it was just all too fucking much!!

i am happier today. i no longer have those semi-suicidal thoughts. hell, i almost died in 2020 from a fucking bowel aneurysm, after my stomach tumour excision surgery. that forced me to put things into perspective. i appreciate the little things . i appreciate the very few friends that i actually have. yes. i’m still depressed and anxious. some days are still shitty and hard. but nowhere as hard and shitty as they were back when i began on here 10 years ago.

how the fuck last 10 years have gone past, with my ass on here; clearing out my blog and caring more about doing that than my uni work (lmao whoops); having made some lifelong friends both internationally (from the US) and long distance domestically in australia, it’s been a long ride; i honestly have no fucking idea. obviously over these past 10 years, i’ve debated with myself over and over and over again whether i should delete/deactivate this account or not. would it make me healthier??? more than likely. but then when i have meltdowns or just inner ramblings i have to get out somewhere, where else to post??? on fb?? obvs not. it’s “attention seeking” or the like on there. no one will read them. no one will resonate. but on here??? even if i got/get one “like” in the notes or one “yo i feel this” response in the tags or replies, it feels like i’ve reached someone??? okay yeah. i know this place IS NOT therapy and i’m not using my followers as amateur (or probs even actual professional) armchair psychologists…. which is a thing i think people need to stop doing internet-wide: but that’s a whole other post that i reblogged a few days ago lmao. i really need to get another therapist, actually lmao.

but it’s the community i’ve found hard to leave. i have what feel like friends, when i’ve never been employed (still as of yet); and when all of my irl friends/acquaintances are working and doing the whole ~adulting~ and ~grown up life~ thing right. it’s also the frenzied rabidness of spite with hating staff’s godawful ideas. the memes. oh the memes. and also the RaWrInG 20s XD emo scene reemergence on here that’s kept me here. the messy petty drama from time to time of big blogs fighting it out.

this place really is bizarre and fun sometimes. and also the fact that i can still hide behind the ridiculous “roaring pikachu” URL that i made all those years ago. i am anonymous. it’s freeing. but on fb it’s all like “WHY WONT YOU ADD A BANNER IMAGE AND TELL US 20 FUN FACTS ABOUT YOU!!!!!???? LET PEOPLE WHO HAVENT SPOKEN TO YOU IN 10 YEARS KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU BECAUSE WE’RE ALL FRIENDS HERE!!!” and the same goes for Corporate Hellscape Facebook™️ (linkedin) but in the professional sense instead. y’all know fuck all about me really. besides my posts. and i love that and live for that. okay yeah. y’all know more about my mental health than my fb feed obvs… which is probably a terribly unfortunate thing. but still.

over the last 10 years then, my superiority complex for being ~so original and intelligent~ or whatever the fuck i had in high school, has all but ebbed away. i’m not that smart just because i went to uni. hell, i literally did NONE of my in-class work and none of my philosophy readings in uni….. so i have fuck all idea of how i got through undergrad like that lmao. i’m not original when so many people can articulate the same thoughts that i have, but like, sometimes better, on a post (even though sometimes/most of the time the Tumblr User Hot Takes Tuesday™️ takes on here are fucking awful lmao). but still. originality is not something i really have anymore. or really had in the first place lmao.

so will i deactivate after these 10 years, like i’ve been saying for so, so long??? i honestly have no idea. but just know. thanks guise. have a nice gpoy selfie day XD. grab your wands. your tardises. grab your war paint. grab your whatever the fuck other fandom specific stuff that was one that hella cringe post from 2011 til 2015 random tumblr. that relic is as old as time itself. just as this mysterious roaring pikachu is for someone whose too loyal to leave this W E B B E D H E L L S I T E that’s just as much of a train wreck as she is. lmao.

#life #about me #shut up ilona #tumblr is legit my fucking life now #motivate me to deactivate this blog to leave the hellsite forever 2021 #trigger warning: suicide mention #tw: suicide mention

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bittybattybunny · 4 years ago

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I hope your not feeling down on your writing skills because I haven't caught up and commented on your latest releases. It's not you it's that I pick too many fanfics to follow and they all update a lot and I've been so busy and I've fallen behind on so many fics from various authors and sometimes my depression just makes me want to lie in bed all day doing nothing and it doesn't help I have to spend my limited spoons helping family everyday. I know these aren't good excuses, but I do sympathize with the lack of energy feeling at least. But your work really does bring a lot of joy to my life. It's so fun keeping up with your various AUs, and your latest one that features Kaya as Spider King has me really hyped because I want to learn more about Kaya, she's so fun! And Ruclipse is such a good comfort ship that just hits all the things I like seeing in a ship. You're so amazing and creative and it's awful that anyone would try to make you feel otherwise! Like your newest OC, Justin Tyme seems like such a lovable dumbass bastard. I love his wild, curly hair and his dapper outfit. I can't wait to see what dumb shit he gets himself into! I know this is really long and rambly, but I hope you know you have fans who genuinely love your work. I don't know if you're still thinking about that one comment you mentioned that got you really down, but honestly, fuck that guy. I don't know what they said but it must have been pure BS to have you doubting your hard earned art skills. I wish I could do more to prove you're awesome and that your fans really admire you, I just hope you don't stop sharing what you love because some rando was nasty for no good reason. Because we love what you do!

It's not like anyone one person nonny so please don't blame yourself. This has been an ongoing thing for a few months actually...

it's just a general thing over all lately like. I mentioned this in dm's with a friend but overall past few months I've had lower engagement overall with my works and it really does a number on my confidence. More so because like your latter point.

yes, I am still very much thinking about that one negative comment. Because that person also has the need to comment on other things and I even had a thing asking why I took a few weeks to update (when reality I posted to another ongoing fic and my TLC chapters are long chapters) and just the fact they could tear into a character (yes it was a comment on a character specifically and not even a main character it's a side character who has an important role for Snatcher's growth as a person down the line) then go saying "why didn't you update" when I posted a double update that week---

Like it lives in my head rent free and I want to literally cry because like the character is a focal in an upcoming chapter and I can't deal with another "why are they back" type thing. because "everyone finds them annoying"

And I'll be honest. it was Kaya. Like I've been trying to have fun with my BCU stuff with her as Spiderking because it's engaging for me and me and @/doodleimprovement even came up with a b-plot involving Kaya and Hattie trying to hook Nell and Marcus together and it's one of the best things as well as Kaya and Nell having a really good relationship.

but because of that one comment it makes me hesitant to do anything with Kaya despite she's one of my oldest ocs, my most thought out ocs and I adore her beyond anything. Like yes she's over powered and such and in TLC rn she comes off as a know it all, but upcoming chapters will show she's just a spacey kid who's trying to fit into a role others decided for her and isn't really as all mighty as she seems. Snatcher even ends up thinking of her as a little sister more than anything. Like fuck I'm even hesitant to share anything on her actual story despite how much work is in it. Like she's my favorite Oc (that's why shes my discord icon, and I'm pretty sure she's my twitter icon as well)

And like the points in the comment just. IDK they didn't fit to her, if anything the points are more suited to be shot at Eclipse.

Which is another thing I just get iffy on. I love RuClipse and everything with it. I love writing and drawing the dorks. But I'm now so afraid if Kaya could be attacked for only showing in a handful of chapters that don't even touch on who she is, when is someone going to finally tell me off on my wolf? who's going to tear into a character I pour a lot of personal shit into to try and comfort myself?

I use Ruclipse to deal with my own romantic heart, they are what I wish I could have so I love to write them, I hurt them but i like to make them happy in the end. Someone who can deal with your highs and lows. No ones perfect but you can still figure it out and love even the negative parts (I am a heavy romantic OTL)

he is in fact a lovable bastard. i have fun plans and he gives me an excuse for why Cel is so tired and having to be the brain cell and how she even wound up working with the time kids when she's so much older than they are. Currently I'm trying to think of how to use him and honestly I think he's gonna wind up hella comic relief fun guy who's just making a mess and do his own side story while Hat and Bow are busy in subcon----

thank you, I don't mind the rambly it kinda gave me a chance to get this off my chest... like I've typed this kinda response up time and time again and I always delete. I feel like I'm whining because I get upset but it's just, I spend so much time making things, I use all my spoons on either working or creating, I just want to know if it means anything but then negativity lives in my head because what's a functioning meat cube??? I try to stay positive but it's hard. Like another thing is Moon Guardian; the reason I haven't updated? because I have had someone bothering me about it. weekly I get asked about how I'm doing on it but it's not from a place of "want to read it" it's because I told them they couldn't post a certain thing until the chapter is done so it feels pressuring to constantly get asked because I feel the only reason they want to post is to boost their thing and I'm just the machine to boost it with my characters and comic.... like it feels they've taken the comic from me and it sucks because I have so many fun things planned. Like I accidentally went off on Nina about a thing with Alpine skyline and Eclipse as well as a thing with a Time Rift and a Jelly ghost.

Sorry kinda went off, just I've sat on this thought train since like early april. I've done my best to ignore it and just keep going but it's gotten really hard with the fact my health hasn't been really great. I've spent a lot of time lately bed bound because I just hurt so badly. if I'm not resting, I'm at my day job which is incredibly stressful rn as I only really work mornings and I see things that are being missed so then i report it and it still gets missed and i can't get it fixed after a point cuz we're back to full service and need the people so I can't nitpick but just.... I'm bitter okay like if I left this shit when I worked I would have gotten yelled at but now we just let it slide??? and this stresses me out which then causes my body to freak out because I'm stressed which puts me in more pain. and then like at work have people acting shocked I have my cane or soemthing and just skfdslkfksdf

so my energy is so tanked. and then the negative comment in my head, no idea if people like things cuz I have no idea if I hear nothing, just has had me doubting why post. Like I should go back to just not posting my stories and sketches or w/e and slink back to my hole like I was before.

idk Its just. a bad night in the house of bun. I've had these thoughts festering and I guess today was the dam breaking. It's probs cuz I'm nervous posting Chimeras because it's a very dark au.

#ask #anon #not art #long post #sorry im just in a bad spot tonight I guess #like i started my day pretty okay but somewhere along the way it nose dived and I'm just trying to not cry in my room

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shhhlikeme · 4 years ago

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“Losty Aone” / “Losty Mountain Man🏔” Series:

Outtake Collection #16:

———————————

A/N: hiiiiiiiiiiiiiii babies!!!!!!!!!! Let’s fucking goooooooooooooo! I’m excited for y’all to read this juicy marathon. As of right now, I am unsure of how many collections it will be but it’s going to be one of the longest marathons ii. Check back every 20 minutes or so if you caught this immediately. Oh and I will be trying again to put my post under a read more but if it fucks up an deletes half the chapter again I am DONE and I TRIED okay??? xo

***ALSO I did not add my taglist to the last marathon so you guys might have missed collections 13-15!!!!***

TABLE OF CONTENTS

———————————

Your Losty Heartbreak and Your Spy Kids Debut 😎🖊📚

Sigh. The curse of being a young adult, I tell ya.

You are annoyed.

Yes, two months after the breakup you are still completely heartbroken, even though, yes, it was your genius idea to break up with the love of your life: a man that girls only dream about having as a S/O….

but it was a selfless decision.

Aone Takanobu deserved more, better… than you. That was your rationale.

It’s not fair of you to just accept the perfect man because he was lost enough to lock onto you and not someone on his level.

While it was a selfless decision , it was still a decision you selfishly regretted because …you were so in love with that man at the time that you did it….

You are….

But you will stifle those emotions so that he can get over you and hopefully see his own worth.

But that didn’t mean you couldn’t be annoyed. Because you were. And at what, exactly? Well:

After dating and breaking up with him, Aone had females constantly approaching him. A/N: Not constantly but it felt that way for you ofc lol

You guess it’s nice that the females of Date Teko gave him the courtesy of one month to get over you but STILL!

Kusa and Katana said that Takanobu’s admirers shot up because everyone witnessed how he treated you, how amazing he was to you, and they fell for that along with his looks.

Your ex’s new admirers are hoping they can get a man that just as inwardly beautiful as he is outwardly and hopefully he will like them, too

In other words: They want what you had.

And what did you want?

Well:

You wanted to rip some hair out. Yours or theirs? You’ll leave that up to subjective interpretation.

EVERY TIME you walked past your ex—that you still love—’s locker there was some brat or another staring up at him in admiration like he was Mount fucking Everest.

You wanted to scream.

but isn’t this what you wanted, Y/N? Your Mountain man to find someone else? Your conscience would ask.

Shut the hell up, conscience. You’d bark back.

You heard from Katana who was keeping tags on his every admirer that he denied them all dates (which defeats the purpose of your break-up, but you smiled nonetheless) but that Aone did agree to host a study session with a group of girls that apparently begged/needed his help in all subjects before finals.

give me a fucking break, you and your conscious agreed.

“Ugh. He’s too kind for his own good. Can’t he see those girls just want an excuse to be near him?!?!” You raged about the study session as you peered closely through the passenger side window to make sure that Kusa got inside her house safely. It was 6pm, and you had just heard the news while on the way home from dinner at your favourite restaurant. Katana drove. From her doorstep, Kusa waved at you before closing her door.

This Saturday, your best friends forced you on your first outing since the breakup, dressing you and even doing your makeup despite your complaining about leaving the house. You had to admit that the food that you did order at the restaurant was decent enough, but really—you would much prefer to still be in bed, flipping through pictures of Aone and Perdu and having a good cry.

Katana rolled her eyes as she stopped at a red light, responding to your initial question. “Ugh. Yeah, they are smarter than we thought. But you’re okay with this, right? I mean this is what you said you wanted when you broke up with him. You said you want him to find a new girl,”” Katana fished for your true feelings, sounding a lot like your annoying conscience.

You sulked, picturing other females near the man you are in love with. It made you sick. But, instead, you said, “Of course I am Okay with it. I want him to be the happiest he can be.”

Katana fixed her eyes on the road and bit her tongue so that she wouldn’t laugh.

You had no idea why you weren’t being fully honest with your friends, but perhaps it made you believe it more the more you said it aloud. “I know Kusa had that assignment to do tonight… and you have that one with Kenji tomorrow, right? so do you want to come over? My mom got me another tub of cookie dough ice cream, and we can rewatch Bad Girls Club again.” You asked Katana in that voice that meant you didn’t want to be alone tonight.

Katana smirked. It was an evil smirk. “I’ll do you one better.”

“Uhhh… Katana….you missed my turn.” Your eyes widened when the cheer captain passed your street, and then passed her own street a few seconds later. “Katana!”

“Word on the cheer team is that Aone-san’s first study session ends in 20 at the local library. I wanna check it out.”

“What?! No you will not—!” You yelled, but you couldn’t help the surge of excitement that flew through your body thinking about seeing that man again. It was always like this.

“—Oh, lighten up— it’s not like I will be joining the damn study session.”

“You won’t?” You asked, surprised.

“Obviously not! Muri is studying something else there, so I need to give her back her notes anyway. It’s only a plus that I’ll get to see how desperate those girls are being with my besties ex. Incognito, kay? I was going to drop you off first and go, but it looks like you don’t wanna be alone. Right?”

Your pretty best friend waited a few seconds for a response, and when she didn’t get one, she nodded. “Exactly.” She turned into the school’s practically empty parking lot, finding her favourite spot. “So, you can stay in the car. No prob. And I won’t tell you anything about it.”

You frowned, watching as Katana reached in the backseat for her purse so that she could take out the notes she had for Muri.

“Okay,” you whispered anxiously.

“I’ll be like, 10 minutes.” The brunette removed her keys from the ignition and stepped outside of her car.

You stayed where you were as Katana’s figure disappeared into the one of the Date Teko’s many entrances. You began to think about what your friend was going to see in there: Aone leaning over the shoulder of pretty Date Teko girls? Helping them with their homework the way he would help you? These girls smelling his fresh icy mountain scent, and leaning in closer, the way you would to him?

Naturally, you began to panic internally.

You pictured the girls twirling their hair flirtatiously and telling him that they didn’t understand when they did, just to keep him hovering over them longer. The same way you used to.

😤😤😤

Your foot started tapping on its own inside Katana’s car, thinking about how your lost ex-boyfriend wouldn’t even pick up any of it as flirting, ugh.

Your imagination created even more concerning visuals: more giggling, more oblivious Aone, more shoulder brushing, more oblivious Aone, and then some more….. yeah. Should it really have come as no surprise that you soon found yourself hidden behind a dusty bookshelf in the anatomy section of your school’s library on a Saturday, squatted down and peeping through the slits between books to catch glimpses of your ex boyfriend hosting a study session?!

You blamed your active imagination.

Behind the dusty shelves, you whimpered because the obstructed vision due to the books covered the white haired beauty perfectly. You held a disgusting book to the right a bit.

“Oh,” your stomach flipped. “He looks so cute.” You put on a 🥺 face when you noticed how utterly adorable a standing Takanobu looked decked out in forest green sweatpants and a matching hoodie with the hood on, and his white hair barely visible.

Your stomach flips were quickly bumped away by sheer annoyance as you saw him then do exactly what brought you up here, just as you thought: innocently leaning down to help a blonde third-year girl you knew by the name of Sutairu Elyts with a question she was asking. She was smiling way too much for someone doing boring ass school work on Saturday, you noted. Flipping her hair, giggling, and obnoxiously putting her cleavage in Aone’s line of sight. You picked up the dusty library book that was obstructing your view and stopped yourself from tossing it at Sutairu— instead choosing to toss it to the side without a care in the world, trying to get a closer look at how close the girl was going to get while Aone answered her question.

You were close to literally poking your head through the bookshelf hole completely, when someone to the left of your hiding spot cleared their throat very loudly. You jumped, bumping your head and hissing in pain.

You removed your head from the bookshelf and looked up at the cause of your newfound migraine.

There stood Katana, her arms crossed and a knowing smile on her face. “You got here faster than I thought,” She reached down to help you up. “Now, come on. None of this amateur shit. You know my style. When it comes to cute boys: make it obvious, and make it count.”

***

Aone was in the middle of teaching Algebra to a group of students (he doesn’t register the fact that they are all conveniently female and all too well dressed for a study session) who had desperately begged him for his help, to the point where the teacher just asked Aone to do it.

He didn’t mind, the teacher offered him extra credit and everyone he was teaching was nice, they didn’t mind him being pretty silent, plus Kenji fully supported it. So why not? Aone mainly supported it because it was a great distraction from his broken heart and his plan….

Or so he thought it would be—before he spotted you in the library.

His heart skipped a beat because he absolutely was not expecting to see you today. His plan wasnt supposed to be put into action until Monday! Trying not to freak out, Aone watched you enter from a side that wasnt the entry way—which is pretty odd—but he shoved the thought to the side anyway because there you were, looking busy.

“Wow.” Takanobu couldn’t stop himself from mouthing when his eyes found you. He mouthed it to himself, of course, but it caused the observant participants in his study group to whip around to see what he was looking at.

you were dressed pretty casually, coming from dinner with the girls, but Aone hadn’t seen you dressed in anything other than your school or cheer uniforms since your breakup, so it took him by surprise

Not to mention you looked really, really, really good:

Aone watched you scan the bookshelves with Katana—which, if Takanobu was thinking straight— he would realistically call bs on you ever coming to the library for no reason, ESPECIALLY on a Saturday— but you looked too gorgeous to him to care

Now that he is working alongside you in a project, he has been able to crawl out of depression a bit, simply because your mere presence made him feel whole again, so he basked in the delight he felt any time he was able to see you.

Aone realized that even though he struck out the first time and failed to make you want to be with him, he had nothing to lose if he tried again.

The premise of Aone’s plan presides on the idea that you are the only girl he wants. Therefore, he just has to prove that to you. Silently. Strategically.

So that’s the only reason why Aone was able to to shift his focus right now and look away from you, effectively returning to helping his study group and making them forget you even walked in.

Aone’s mission is to become the man that you want and need, naturally. He will exude more confidence: which is a testament to the fact that he was here right now: tutoring a bunch of girls who have asked him out and he has rejected before because of you,

He wants word to get back to you that your ex is the type of guy who knows how to be just friends with people who had feelings for him. Just in case you wanted to start there with him.

He wants to be your friend. Aone wants to be anything to you but a stranger. It’s the only way his heart stops aching and if that’s all you can give him is a friendship after this project is over, then that is what he would willingly accept!

Aone forced himself to look back down, getting up to step around the circular table to help with the other girls’ study guides.

He was able to keep his cool for the most part, but almost lost it twice...

Once when you dropped a book and bent down to pick it up, showcasing how amazing your butt looked in those jeans.

Aone cleared his throat to get his own attention back and turned away quickly when he felt a familiar stir under his sweatpants. He stuffed his hands deep in his sweatpants pockets and directed his energy back to the paper in front of him. He erased an answer for one of his students and plugged in the correct one.

The second time Takanobu almost lost his cool was when he heard you make a cute noise and his eyes flicked back up to you. You were trying to reach a book that was too high for you but probably met the height of his ear, your hand above your head, your bodyweight on your toes which gravitationally rose your top up as well, exposing the naked skin on your lower back.

Aone’s throat went dry and he bit back a groan because the last time he’d stared at that lower back of yours so intensely: you were in a perfect arch, naked, using his dick to pleasure yourself when he told he was on the phone.

Cue hands in pockets again.

He recalled how that section of your back had a light layer of sweat on it back then, making it glisten as he bit his lip, trying not to moan to the feeling of your tight and juicy walls running up and down his length. Holy, shit, that feel good.

Aone began thinking about helping you get that book and then fucking you against that bookshelf you were leaning on: holding you up in his arm, the other hand used to place it behind your head as a cushion so that you did not harm yourself when he sheathed his big dick inside your absolutely perfect box, so hot and so delicious, and soo hard not to cum inside within the first minute…..

👁👅👁 Aone’s eyes glazed over to the point where one of his tutor-ies had to snap their fingers in front of his face.

Highly embarrassed, Takanobu pulled it together ASAP, muttering a quick and sincere apology and thinking only of his plan. Trusting in his plan, he refused to look up in your general direction again. He didn’t trust himself to.

***

“He barely looked my way….” You sobbed into your cookie dough ice cream later that night, Katana rubbing your back and removing your hair out the tub.

“Please, Y/N,” Katana begged, absolutely gutted seeing her best friend like this. “Please be honest with yourself and make sure you truly stand by the decision you made.”

———————————

A New Aone and a Perfect Plan? ✅🤩

Mountain Man put absolutely all of his energy into his plan to get you back. His understanding is that you broke up with him because he wasn’t good enough for you, so that means he would just have to make himself good enough for you. While Kenji was completely against Aone trying to get back the girl who broke his heart, Kenji found himself agreeing with the plan since it meant that his best friend would be speaking, playing volleyball, and overall living life again while it was in action. The plan was to essentially fake it till you make it—show you that Takanobu could be the man you deserved.

The gist of the plan was for Aone to disallow himself to be zombie-like anymore, because you probably didn’t like that. He started spending more time with his friends again, and he was eating again. He was banking on this plan, and if it didn’t work—sure, he’d be crushed for the rest of his life—but at least he’d have no regrets. It wouldn’t be easy, he’d have to speak back to other females kindly letting them down when all he wanted to do was speak to you. He’d have to ignore you when you walked by which meant going against his every instinct, and he’d have to speak to you confidently in class when you two were working on the project and small talk about your lives, when all he wanted to do was lean in and kiss you until he could taste you even when he pulled away.

Thoughts of you consumed him, still, but they were now hopeful thoughts. He was not going to let his dream girl walk away that easily.

A/N: GO BABY GOOOOO

You, on the other hand, took this new and confident Aone as a sign that he was getting over you. He didn’t seem very sad anymore, you didn’t see that same dejected and lost eyes you saw when he pushed his best friend away from you. You saw intensity there, like he was now focused on a new task in his life. It confused you, and it hurt like a bitch, because deep down you knew he’d move on soon and you wouldn’t.

But this is what you wanted, right? 🙄🙄Repeated your conscience, again. You really wanted to fight her.

“Y/N, you seem out of it today.” Mountain Man stopped writing the outline of the content analysis in class to stare down at you. You could see the concern in his eyes, but you refused to believe it was anything more than the concern anyone would feel for an ex turned friend, and nothing more.

Embarrassed, you realized that you must have zoned-out, and now this gorgeous man that you wanted to jump was calling you out on your odd behaviour. “W-was I?’ You shook your head then looked down in your lap. “Sorry.”

Aone placed his pencil down, heart pounding because he wanted that frown of yours to disappear so badly. ��Is it about your University Cheerleading tryouts?” He asked kindly, too kindly—if you had any hope of getting over him in the next 5 years.

You looked up at him, confused as to why he’d even mention that.

The white haired beauty blushed. “Kogane—he, uh, well…” Aone took a second to look away and collect his thoughts because your big beautiful eyes were making him lose his train of thought. He reminded himself of his plan and collected himself, returning to your gaze. “Kogane-san mentioned to Kenji and I this morning that Kusa needed someone to film her audition tape, because that is the only way cheerleaders are able to send in your tryouts for schools that are too far away, correct?”

“Oh,” You nodded. “Ya—“

Aone continued without missing a beat. “I know Kogane is helping film Kusa’s, and you mentioned yesterday that Katana is out of town for a camp… so, and feel free to say no: but I’d love to offer you my help, Y/N. With filming and editing.”

There was a pause in which you just looked at Aone with those big beautiful eyes that he thinks about 24/7.

Afraid that he might be coming onto way too strong, which goes against his super slow plan, Takanobu adds: “As friends. Offer you my help as friend.”

Your heart sunk, but he looked so sweet asking, not to mention you really did need to get on that tryout instead of pushing it off until you miss it completely and don’t end up going to University—

If you didn’t get a cheer scholarship you were screwed; Aone knew this. Not to mention you would love to see him more; Aone did not know this.

“I’ve taken photography as my elective for the past three years and do pretty well in that class in terms of grades, so I just thought…” Mountain Man was scared shitless, nervously listing off his accomplishments like this was an interview…. mostly due to the fact that you hadn’t answered him yet. Too fast, she can tell you want her back—now she’ll never give you another chance. Failure. Aone opened his mouth to retract his offer, but you interrupted him before he could get the first word out.

“Um, yes. Sure. I’d love your help, Aone-san. I promise it won’t take long. Thank you so much.”

Aone nodded even though he was bursting at the seams inside. Mountain Man couldn’t believe it. After being broken up with because your feelings weren’t there, you agreed to spend non-school related time with him?! The middle blocker couldn’t help but think that you wouldn’t have said yes, had he still been acting like a zombie. Actually, he wouldn’t even have dared asked, if he was still acting like a zombie. Now he gets to help you and see you more than he has since the breakup, and he considers this like a gift! Yes!

“Great. Just tell me where and when you would like to have your audition, and I will be there.” A very cool reply.

You even rewarded him even more with a smile. “How about next Tuesday? Here on the field since it’s getting warm out again? I need to rehearse a lot and that gives me enough time.”

“Understood.” A cool second later, Takanobu had to excuse himself to the washroom so that he could celebrate in silence. He texted his friends and took a deep breath.

Selfishly, Aone also wanted to help you with this particular audition because he wanted you to go to the same University as he and Kenji. He wanted to help you with your future assignments and he wanted to see you everyday. How great would that be? A little torturous, too. But if you were on a cheer team and happy, then: mostly great.

Baby steps, Mountain Man sighed contentedly. He would get you back in baby steps, and this was the first one.

He just had to keep following the plan.

———————————

Taglist: @galagcica @chaichai-the-weeb @nairobiisqueen @bisasterrr @juminly @simply-not-the-same @marvelousbakugou @qyuanon 💛

Outtake #17: CLICK HERE!

#aone takanobu x you #aone takanobu stories #aone takanobu #aone takanobu fluff #haikyuu boys #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu!!#hq headcanon #aone x reader #aone x y/n #haikyuu headcanons #hq headcannons #haikyuu headcannons #koganegawa kanji #kenji futakuchi #haikyuuwritersnet #haikyuu series

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wild-aloof-rebel · 4 years ago

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hi!! I recently found your blog, fell completely in love, and then was introduced to the rest of sc tumblr. I was inspired (by you, mostly) to start my own blog, but I’m not entirely sure how to get involved in the schitt’s creek community on here- so I was just wondering if you had any advice for a tumblr newbie who wants to share their love of sc with others!! thank you tons for all you do <3

oh goodness, hi! welcome to tumblr!

i guess the first thing to know about getting involved here is that that tends to look different than it does on other social media sites. finding other fans on twitter or facebook or whatever is like being at a house party—it’s loud, with lots of people yelling about lots of different things in the same general space, but there are always conversations happening that you can get drawn into. tumblr is more often like standing alone in your living room, yelling about things you like, and occasionally one of your neighbors will poke their head through your window to yell with you before they have to go home and yell in their own living room for a while. that’s not to say that you can’t develop relationships here; i just think it’s important to recalibrate your idea of what that process looks like.

so, anyway, how do you actually engage with other people here?

if you’re making content, whether that’s gifs or edits or fics or fan art or any kind of post discussing the show, tag it. use both sc tags (schitt’s creek and schitts creek), use relevant character or relationship tags, etc. lots of people follow those tags, so they’ll see your posts pop up on their dash on occasion or when they go directly into the tag.

reblog other people’s content and say things in the tags. just liking things is fine, but the interaction stops there. if you want to actually participate, you want to reblog posts that you like, and do some of that yelling alone in your living room in the tags. (lots of people who are new to tumblr tend to do it directly on their reblog of the post, but generally speaking, the culture of tumblr is to only put things directly on the post if they’re actually contributing to the discussion in some way, since that will continue to be attached to the post any time someone reblogs it from you. personal commentary like, omg i love this, goes in the tags instead.) yelling in the tags may seem like yelling into a void, and it kind of is, but almost everyone i know checks the tags on reblogs of their own posts, which means people see your enthusiasm. if people notice you in their tags often enough, they might check out your blog and decide to follow you. plus, this is how your own followers get to know you better, too. it’s even better of course if you say interesting or funny things, but obviously not every post is gonna cause earth-shattering revelations for you to drop in the tags, so it’s def okay to just be like, this gifset is gorgeous, can you even believe how in love they are?

reply to posts when it’s appropriate. (it’s the little speech bubble button, in case that’s not clear.) if someone posts that they’re having a bad day, you might reply to their post and tell them you hope it gets better. if you have a question about something someone posted, you might reply to ask it. you prob shouldn’t reply to every gifset that comes across your dash to say how much you like it—again, that’s what tags are for—but if there’s something specific you have to say to whoever created a post, replies are a good way to do that. (note: you cannot delete your own replies on other people’s posts, so be sure it’s actually something you want to say before you reply.)

send non-anonymous asks. the best option tumblr has for directly engaging with other fans one-on-one is sending asks, but if you’re looking to build relationships, you have to do it with your name attached. otherwise, how will they know you’re a different person from any other anon that sends an ask, and how will they know where to find you if they want to ask you things too? so when people post ask games, send an ask. when you want to know what someone thinks, send an ask. when you’ve already left kudos and comments on ao3 but really want to let an author know you loved their fic, send an ask. just remember that if you’re really looking to engage with others, you have to ask things in a way that actually opens up conversation. @patrickredactedbrewer talked about some dos and don’ts for this just the other day if you need tips on that. ask things, ask follow-ups, and reply to or reblog asks to continue the conversation too.

the last thing i’ll say is it takes time. you’re not gonna build a network of followers and mutuals overnight, but little by little, you’ll find your people and they’ll find you. <3

#anon #replies #idk why it's doing that weird line break

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sillyfudgemonkeys · 3 years ago

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i havent been here in a hot second is there a reason for the makoto hate specifically? like the rants go back to p5's writing issues but the spite for makoto seems very specific did she kill someones dog in one of the spinoffs or what?

You're all good. So here's the thing, she did kill my dog-I'm joking.

When I say “I’m the residential #1 Makoto Hater” it’s a joke, partially cause it probs looks that way (and probs cause it might be true, who knows if you could quantify hate then maybe I’m at the top of the leaderboards 8U but you can’t so we’ll never know). But I’m saying it at as a joke, to own myself and everyone here that knows what I think of her, rather than wear it as a badge of honor or some silliness. It’s just a “oh haha yeah there goes Silly, dunking on Makoto again! She’s basically Makoto’s #1 hater haha oh she’s so silly.” (so please don’t look too deep into it, I just want to have fun).

Anyway, me hating Makoto isn’t new, but I do hold a similar ire towards Futaba, Goro (tho I have camaraderie with his fans, I relate to their struggle in terms of my own brown hair and red eye fav and Atlus screwing them over u_u I may hate your fave but I respect you and will be in your corner), and Yukari (as well as Chloe from LiS if you want a non-Persona example). Makoto might be talked about more because 1) She hits my buttons that much faster (Futaba/Goro are more like a festering wound, and when I talk about them it’s hard to pick a starting point), 2) Her fans tendency (early on in the fandom) bringing her up frequently.....was a bad combo with #1 (overexposure+pushing all my buttons really fast=disaster). Obvie not blaming her fans, but it was hard to curate how I was able to curate my content online (esp with gaming news websites calling her “best girl” when showing off a figure announcement or some BS when I just want to know what new games have been announced >.> I can do without you trying to start a waifu war in the comments Siliconera -_-)

Anyway, I think I’ve made my reasons for hating her very clear (you just have to search her name on my blog and you’ll get a ton of essays I’m sure, too many to count). And a lot of it is the failure of P5′s writing. “So it’s just the writing you hate, not the character.” No. Because that doesn’t make sense. Except under certain circumstances (which I’ll provide examples of below with Luke Skywalker), you can’t separate the writing from the character. The character IS the writing, the writing IS the character. If you can’t hate/dislike the char because “of the writing” then you also can’t love/like them either. The character and the writing/writing choices for that character are connected. The writing embodies that character. They are the same.

Now I said there was an exception, and that’s....”different writer/director,” tho it’s not ALWAYS the case (sometimes the new writer really gets the original writing, like Saito for MM.....they are very good at emulating the clusterfuck of P5′s writing). P5′s writing is the original basis for Makoto’s character, that’s her. You can’t separate it from her. Same thing with say....Luke Skywalker from the OG trilogy, that’s him. But then we get to the sequel/Disney trilogy, new writer/director....and yeah that’s a mess (from what I understand OG trilogy=Hopeful and tries to see the best in people, 2nd Disney=Cynic and tried to kill a child, 3rd Disney=Hopeful again for some reason). There’s character development, then there’s just straight up changing the character just cause you need them to be this now.

*writes how this can apply to Persona spinoffs but deletes because I was getting too off track* Look at me exercising control. It’s probs best I save that for a meta after I’ve replayed all the spinoffs again.

But....if you want me to boil down my issues with Makoto, I hate the message we get from her. I hate the lesson we learn from her. What is supposed to happen vs what happens. It’s supposed to be about a girl who is blindly following authority and becomes disillusioned with it after being burned by it, on top of “immense pressure” she has as well, and then comes to our side (we know this because Atlus told us). We don’t get that (we know this because we saw the execution). We get two adults, yes TWO ADULTS, one of which is her sister and wants her to do well in school (but isn’t like.....a tiger mom about it, because Sae can’t be TOO horrible because we need to like her later), who in retrospect seems very busy with her job (which gives Makoto freedom), but also feels burdened by her younger sister (in which she has one shitty slip with her and then NEVER again). And the other is a dumbass principal who asks a really strange and stupid task for Makoto that snowballs into bullshit. That’s IT! THAT’S IT! That’s all we get from Makoto and “authority.” Strawmen. We don’t really get much of her personality either (I’m not saying that cause “she’s cardboard” I legit just.....don’t get her? Like I don’t get enough of her to get a solid foundation, you get me?) Like as the player, what we see of her is she’s just studying in the library (Kamo arc), then the principal calls her in, she mentions the rumors about Kamo, he asks her to look into the PT in exchange for a recommendation (to which she’s surprised and says thanks, not no, she looks like she’ll accept JUST BASED ON THAT) but before she can even say Yes (OR NO) he threatens Makoto with her sister, to which Makoto hardens and then agrees. Then she acts like an asshole and yadda yadda stuff happens.

But if she’s supposed to blindly follow authority, she’d say yes, but then they don’t let the character breathe so she can make the “wrong” choice because the Principal goes STRAIGHT to threatening her.......so now the message is muddled, or really it’s non existent. The whole Sae thing is a nothing bag too, it’s just family drama. Her sister is, no HAS to be absent a lot for her work, just so Makoto can have the freedom to be a PT....which means....it hurts her lack of freedom and other stuff associated with Sae being a big pressure on Makoto’s life. You know, I’ve said before they’ve squandered Sae, and that Makoto’s presence really harmed Sae (iirc it was this post). But at the same time, how they handled Sae really screws up Makoto’s character. Neither are allowed to breathe. Neither are allowed to make a true, horrible choice...and then learn from it. They aren’t allowed to have an actual arc. Altus played it safe, took choice away from them, didn’t want to take risks with either character and have meaning. Instead we just have this nothing contradiction thing dicking around until they join our team.

What really sucks about that....is we got that with the Kamo arc. With Anne, Ryuji, even Yuki and Shiho. Kamo was manipulative, and his manipulation caused people to make....not the best choices, all out of a means to survive. Ryuji physically acted against Kamo, and he got his leg broken, team disbanded, and outcasted. Anne was trying to protect Shiho’s position on the team, which lead to her almost getting harmed by Kamo, Shiho getting harmed, her not seeing the truth about what was going on around her, and she didn’t tell Shiho (because she didn’t want Shiho to think she didn’t get on the team for her own merits), and so on. Shiho didn’t tell Anne what was going on because she wanted to protect Anne from Kamo (and was afraid Anne would, very much blame herself), and her and Yuki and the rest of the teams helped keep quiet about Kamo so they wouldn’t be next on the physical chopping block. This isn’t me blaming them, this is me showing their choices, their attempts to fix their (hopeless) situation, to help themselves or others, and the dramatic irony being it just made everything worse. BUT, even tho Kamo was the real one to blame, each character is aware of the actions that were made, and the consequences of each action (esp Anne/Ryuji/Shiho). And in their CoOps, they identify this, and take strides to learn from it so it doesn’t happen again. That’s an arc. That’s character development. They were allowed to make errors, mistakes, decisions that negatively impacted themselves/other’s. We see a solid foundation of their character from the get go, and how it changes over that small time. We don’t get that with Makoto. The group is like solid concrete to Makoto who is like shifting sand.

Sorry got a bit off topic, anyway, I hate her message of boasting about her fighting ability but she only harms her friends (outside of shadows, but that’s not special) WHILE ALSO being a damsel that needs someone else to rescue her! I hate how when she gets called out, she wants to drop it, and gives gaslighty apologies, even tho she really ROYALLY screwed lot of people very badly. I hate how she demands us to help, only to literally be a detriment to our investigation. I hate how she gets to fly off the handle without repercussions (despite needing to be cool calm and collected for her job, especially since she miraculously can do that when needed so what the hell????). I hate how the text has her be shitty, say shitty things, be bad at her job, but will turn around and reward her time and time again.

Sure she doesn’t break the lore like Futaba, or unravel P5′s plot like Goro. But as a character with a message attached to her, even ones that the creators surely overlooked (I’m sure they didn’t intend for her to only hit her friends), it’s simple but very annoying. Fast and easy to see, doesn’t require me to think of P5′s lore as well as the grander Persona lore. Doesn’t require me to dig through text for Goro bread crumbs and then unravel the entire basis of the P5 plot thanks to him. Makoto is easier to get into, it’s smaller scale and more personal I guess.

#silly asks #silly answers #makoto salt #the thing with Kamo's arc is that when you ask 'why' to why a character or a situation is the way it is you can give a decent 'because'#when you ask 'why' with kane's arc.....you don't get that #you get a 'because' but then you keep asking 'why'#why does makoto have to stalk the PT? Because the principal is making her do it #But why is he making her do it? Because the conspiracy is breathing down his neck.#1) WHY her tho? seems a bit contrived and might not work 2) WHY do they care about some principal?#Because......um...... For 2 because he's part of the conspiracy.#Why is he part of the Conspiracy then? Um....they put him there?#BUT WHY did they put him there? Cause....it's prestigious?#BUT the game said Kamo fixed the school's bad rep so it wasn't always that...and he hired kamo.....SO WHY does he owe them getting a job at-#-a shitty school? WHY did he need help getting a job there? WHY is Haru there if-#you see? kane's arc unravels a good portion of what P5 (a least school) is based off of #vs Anne #Why won't Shiho tell Anne about the abuse? She's afraid anne might think it's her (anne's) fault and she loves her friend and wants to-#protect her. why doens't anne tell shiho? Anne doesn't want shiho to think it's shiho's fault and wants to protect shiho #kamo's arc is full of dramatic irony and people making wrong choices (which they might not realize in hindsight)#why doesn't anne know shiho is being abused? Anne thinks shiho is upset about her position on the team also Kamo won't let anyone watch #the practices so we just take the team's words at face value also the teams are protecting kamo to keep from getting hurt-#also shiho won't tell anne anything and so anne just assumes it's a rough practice and that shiho is afraid of losing her spot ALSO #ALSO anne isn't psychic also anne is outcasted from the rest of the school so she doesn't interact with them so she doesn't know what's up-#with other people and-#you can go on they have their bases covered in kamo's arc they have reasons #kamo's arc is also a bit more grounded (kane being ungrounded because of the stupid princpal and his bs0 #sorry for the side rant just.......#you don't have to agree with decisions in the kamo arc...but at least they GAVE us reasonings (and the chars are aware #in hindsight that their decisions weren't great and chose to learn from them)

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mjmnorwood · 5 years ago

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[I.D. A header image of two pencils on a yellow background, with title reading ‘Redrafting’. End I.D.]

I think redrafting can sometimes be a bit of an elusive topic. I see loads of posts with advice for finishing the first draft (which is fantastic!) but advice for what comes after you’ve finished that mammoth task is less common. Here I’ll be outlining my redrafting process, and you can pick and grab whatever bits are useful for you!

1. Let the manuscript rest.

I love to fixate on my projects (what can I say? It’s a serotonin mine!). This focus is great for finishing stuff, but it can get in the way of redrafting, because you get too close to your work to be able to spot things that need changing. When you finish a manuscript, put it aside for however long it takes for you to be able to look at it with fresh eyes. I find this is usually a month or more for novels. This is a great time to work on other projects!

2. Re-read the manuscript, then outline (or re-outline).

When it comes to re-reading your manuscript, try to look at it with a critical eye (note: this doesn’t mean you have to be negative about it! Just have your editor hat on). Don’t make edits as you read, instead, jot down anything you think needs changing. At this stage, it’s going to be big picture stuff, structure, characterisation, plotting, novel pacing etc. Small details like phrasing come much later.

After this, take your list of changes and think about how they’re going to alter your book, then make an outline based on this new structure. I think this step is incredibly helpful regardless of whether you plotted or pantsed your first draft (I’ve done both). It makes the next stage so much easier.

3. Take your outline, and write the book again.

This is a lot of work, and believe me, if I thought I could get away without it, I would, but I haven’t found anything else that improves my books as much as a rewrite. If you start over from scratch, you’re less tied to what you wrote in your first draft, so it’s much easier to make the big changes that you need to make. This doesn’t mean you have to throw your first draft out, though! You worked hard on that, there’ll be a lot of good stuff there. I like to keep it open in another window while I write the second draft, so I can copy and paste scenes I want to put in the new version (with a bit of an edit).

4. Third draft time!

After letting the manuscript rest again, come back for some editing. Don’t worry, it’s not another rewrite (unless you want to do that again...). This is where more ‘medium-picture’ changes come in, things like deleting unnecessary parts, editing the pacing of scenes, making sure character details are consistent and the like. This isn’t an exact science, you can do small-picture edits to get your prose how you want it (I’d probs advise not to go hog wild on these though, since there’ll be more changes later), or you can do more big edits (I ended up deleting a whole subplot when I was doing the third draft of my most recent book). Basically, the idea of this draft is to make it the best you can make it with only your perspective to go on.

5. Let other people to take a look.

This is where I bring in beta-readers. It’s the scariest part, in my opinion, but so worth it. Other people will spot things about your book you’d never in a million years be able to spot yourself. I like to give my books to about 3-5 people, get their feedback, then make changes based on whatever they’ve said that I think is useful.

6. Rinse and repeat.

Keep getting feedback and making changes until you’re happy with your book! This can be from beta-readers and critique partners, also sensitivity-readers and editors if you can afford those services. The idea is that with each round of revision, your manuscript should become more refined, and the changes gradually get more and more small-scale (though sometimes a reader will throw a curveball that makes you realise more big edits are needed). This is a long process, and it can be a bit of a slog, but you can work on other projects at the same time, and actually, I think the editing process itself can be fun! It's the satisfaction of polishing a rough-cut gem.

And that’s it! I hope you find these steps helpful in developing your own revision processes. Happy editing!

Like this post? Follow for more writerly content! It’ll be lovely to have you along :D

#writing advice #writing tips #writeblr #writing help #editing #redrafting #writing #writers on tumblr #writeblr community #writers #original

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pomegranates-and-blood · 4 years ago

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the new chapter of those who weave rips!! (although i don’t think it’s showing up in the tags jsyk) freydis shines so bright in this chapter and GOSH I love your freydis so, so much. she is so good!

the way she sized up the reader was excellent. i loved that even though ivar never really bothered to know her, freydis knows him very well, and it means something to her that the reader is someone who could love/be loved by ivar. that understanding between them brings such an interesting layer to them becoming sister-wives!

you prob have to be in a fairly sunken place to be befriending the other woman (dissolution of the marriage privately aside), but in the weirdest way, having someone who could understand her was just what she needed, and it hit me to see how much she perked up after they became friends🥺 I also adore how similar freydis is to ivar in her desire to have something to tie her in a tangible way to reader. ✨pretty interesting✨

you did such a great job of developing their relationship in this chapter though, 6k words well-spent imo! watching the reader coax freydis out of her shell was both delightful and satisfying. it was really impressive how strongly you were able to characterize them in just a few scenes, their dynamic is just stellar. I can really see how&why they would love each other and I love them as a result! it was a fantastic chapter that did an amazing job of establishing freydis&the reader, can’t wait for the next chapter to break my heart!!

Omg sweetheart, thank you so much! Idk what you mean about the tags, but I suppose it is just tumblr being tumblr lmao

I'm so glad to hear you like my rendition of Freydis! I tried keeping true to her character and inherent shadiness of her lmao, while kinda making her a bit more vulnerable after these years and all that has happened to her during them

Yeah, Freydis is of course very observant, and since the beginning she kinda figured Ivar out (to me she did from that first moment in canon, and it shows when she meets Ivar again in Kattegat, she says exactly what he wants to hear, and if I ignore Hirst just writing her as a plot device, I can pretend it is because she is smart enough to chameleon her way through life. Problem is, she has a man fall in love with something she kind of isn't, like the whole deal with Narses in Nostalgia. Under the cut I'll post a short thingy that I'm proud of when it comes to my take on Freydis, it's from Her Own, and it’s relevant to that idea of her being loved for something she isn’t), and she knows what it is like to love Ivar and to be loved by him, so she is, much like Aslaug in that little snippet of Hope I shared a while ago, testing the Reader, seeing if she bends or breaks.

It's very fun to write, because Freydis is in a strange limbo, and that only continues throughout the rest of this. She cares about the Reader, and she feels understood by her, she finds herself not so alone now that this woman (that by all accounts she should hate, and maybe in some level she does) came into their lives; but from Freydis' perspective, she is witnessing Ivar be towards the Reader as he was towards her, look at her like he once looked at Freydis, and Freydis doesn't have this lasting and selfless love for Ivar that may make her say 'okay, as long as he's happy'. Hell no, Freydis, to me, is selfish, and that is part of the reason I love her. She was married to a tyrant that burnt people alive, but she didn't bat an eye until he touched something/someone she cared about by taking Baldur from her.

I'm sorry for the rant (I deleted like the length of the previous paragraph's worth of useless Freydis talk my brain just continued to tell me to type out lol), thank you so so much for your kind words! I'm so happy to hear their relationships and their dynamics were well established in this, that is my main goal, since Sight is only the beginning!

You're too kind nonnie, thank you so so much for your support!! Love ya!

“You expect nothing for yourself, but you’ve revealed everything to me.” I have revealed nothing, she wants to scream, you haven’t let me. He continues, “You are all goodness. All truth.”

What makes her heart feel like it is being squeezed tight in his fist is that he looks like he believes what he is saying. She isn’t all goodness and doesn’t want to be, she hasn’t ever told the whole truth.

She wants to yell and scream and demand that he look at her, that he look at her face and see more than the woman he is proud to have made his wife and see the wear all those years of suffering have left etched in the angles and creases; that he look at her body and see more than the vessel for his child and see the scars and the mark of hunger that after months of life as a queen she feels hasn’t left her body.

She wants to be seen, seen as more than fragments of glass put together however he sees fit, seen as more than whatever image of her he sees even when looking directly into her eyes.

But it is better to be wanted like this than to not be wanted at all, she knows that much. And so she smiles, and pretends the tears in her eyes are for him, and tells him what he wants to hear. It wears on her, to see love and feel like she’s seeing it thought the cracks in a wall even when it is looking directly into her eyes, to feel love and see it accepted and embraced as long as she can be what he wants her to.

(It's from Her Own, a one shot I made of an AU where she survives past 5x20 and escapes Kattegat)

#answered asks #asks and replies #those who weave asks

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pencilwritesshiz47 · 4 years ago

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An Apology in the Form of an Adventure

MGR Chapter Five

[Previous] [Next] [Masterpost]

TW: Arguing

Dame Lauren Baker stared at her screen, not listening as the broadcaster kept on talking. All she could think about were those words.

"Xan Ruz is no more."

What did that even mean? How could a country be “no more”? All she knew was that there was no way that could be a good thing. And her best friend was stuck there.

She wanted to panic. But she couldn't panic. Not in front of... her. She stared at the girl who had crashed on top of her only minutes ago. She was the reason Goldie was in this situation. She was the one who left her. She...

Lauren took a deep breath. Maybe Goldie was ok. She swiped out of the broadcast screen, and opened her phone app, quickly hitting Goldie's contact.

She put her phone up to her ear, her heart racing.

Briiiing.

"Heeeeey!"

Lauren gasped. "Goldie! Goldie, are—are you alright? I—"

"You've reached Goldie Potter, and I'm not at the phone right now, sorry 'bout that. Anywaaaays, I'll call ya back when I can! Byeeeeeeeeee—"

She hung up. She tried to convince herself that Goldie's phone was just dead, but her mind kept jumping to other thoughts...

"I'm sorry."

Lauren looked over at the girl, her words breaking off her internal ranting.

"You should be."

The girl sighed and looked at her feet. "I know. I screwed up. I should have brought her with me. But you have to understand, I really tried! Everything was so crazy, and I just— I-I'm just so sorry."

And then, in that moment, Lauren had a choice. Forgive her, or not.

Almost subconsciously, she chose "not". The raging part of her took over, sending the rational part back. She started yelling again, but she wasn't even sure what she was saying until she found herself ranting about the girl helping them rescue Goldie.

She looked at the girl, her face full of fear. The girl shakily took a piece of paper and a pen out of her pocket, scribbled something on it, and handed it to her, mumbling, "My contact information." Then she walked off.

Lauren just stood there. She wasn't sure what to think, or what to feel. She looked at the paper in her hands. It was pink, with little flowers around the edges. Written on it in some of the fanciest writing she'd ever seen, were the words, "Lady Elisabeth Melly," and then an address and a phone number. She shoved it into her pocket but she didn't leave. She just stood there.

She wasn't sure how long it had been since the girl—Lady Elisabeth—had left, but when she heard footsteps the sky was a shade of purple so dark it ought to be black.

"Hey," a gentle called out. "It's late."

"She's still in Xan Ruz," Lauren responded, almost robotically.

"What?"

"Goldie. She's still in Xan Ruz. A-and I called her, and she didn't answer. And I think someone's going to help us find her in three days if she doesn't come back but I don't even know—"

The person had come around to her by now, and she just sank into their arms, soon realizing that it was her friend, Marigold. She looked up at her, her eyes filled with tears. "M, I don't know what to do and I'm-I'm scared."

"Let's go home," she whispered, and slowly, they stared to walk back to the JKA.

✧✧✧

"You double-checked the checklist, right? We do have everything?" The knight asked.

"For the last time, yes." The healer said, a bit exasperated although she still had a small smile on her face.

"Are you sure you're not lying to me?"

"Would I lie to you about a checklist?"

Lauren sighed. "I sure hope not."

Three days had passed since her encounter with the noblewoman. And since Goldie hadn't returned, they were heading out for Xan Ruz.

Unfortunately, the JKA leader Dame Alice, wasn't completely thrilled with a sector leader and a healer to go wandering off on an international rescue adventure, so the two had to sneak out.

"Ok, now when did Di say she'd be closing the portal?" Lauren asked, not wanting to be late.

"Uh, I think it was the 23rd hour? And it's the 22nd hour right now, so we're good." Marigold replied.

Lauren nodded, and peaked out her bedroom door. Thankfully, there was no one there, and she motioned to Marigold to follow her.

They tip-toed through from one end of the hallway to the other, stopping when they reached door 3. The brunette knocked on the door softly, and the blue-haired girl answered, yawning slightly. "Thank the gods you're here, this portal is a bit harder to keep open then I thought."

Lauren knit her brows. "But isn't the location pretty close to here?"

Di sighed. "Yeah, it does seem to be, but for some reason it's just... tiring. That could be from the strain leftover from opening that Xan Ruz portal, but something is still off..."

Lauren frowned. "Well, we'll look into that when we get back. But thank you for opening this."

Di smiled. "No prob boss," and the two stepped through the portal.

✧✧✧

"We're outside the palace," the sprite remarked, staring at the building looming just yards away from them.

Lauren stared at it. It was quite huge, with many towers and high walls. The dark gray brick and numerous Calinas flags gave it a sense of majesty and elegance, but in the dark it felt frightening as well.

But Lauren wasn't paying attention to it, instead, she was trying to find the river where, according to Marigold, Lady Elisabeth had arranged a boat to be placed.

It took her a second, but she quickly found the brown wooden rowboat. It was modest, but it would work. She quickly dragged Marigold over to it, and climbed in.

She took a moment to take it all in—the feeling of the rough wood beneath her, the smell of the cool night air, and the gentle sounds of the river flowing. But it didn't last long—she had other things to attend to.

She opened her phone, as there wasn't enough light for her to see her watch. In bright white letters behind her lockscreen (A selfie of her, Goldie, and Marigold taken just a few months after she joined the JKA) was the time—22:19. She sighed. They had made it on time.

Marigold went over to the side of the boat, and quickly climbed in, splashing both of them. Lauren giggled, leaned over to the side of the boat, and cupped up some water in her hands. Then, quick as an arrow, she threw it at Marigold's back. The sprite turned around, her face in an expression of mock anger. She gasped, and took a bit of water in her hands, gently spraying Lauren with it.

They went on like this for a few minutes, although Marigold was far more wet than Lauren. When they were finally finished with their splash-fest, Lauren checked her phone's time again, frowning.

"What's wrong?" Marigold asked, concern lacing her voice.

Lauren showed the healer her phone, the time reading 22:24—Elisabeth was four minutes late.

"Oh," Marigold said, frowning slightly. "Don't worry, she'll be here soon."

Lauren sighed, but nodded. Not knowing what else to do, she looked up at the stars, smiling.

The stars had always fascinated Lauren. They were dots of mystery lining the sky, and she loved to find constellations and see if she could guess where the moons that weren't visible this time of month were.

At about 22:29, Marigold went out to see if she could spot Elisabeth, and it took another two minutes until she finally showed up.

Lauren rolled her sapphire-colored eyes. "You're late."

Elisabeth scowled. "For your information, it wasn't exactly easy getting out of the meeting. Although I doubt you'd understand that, as I assume that you got out without any trouble."

Lauren huffed. "Well, you know what happens when you assume, because it was actually quite a bit of a challenge getting out."

Elisabeth said nothing, and simply climbed into the boat.

Lauren looked up at Marigold, who seemed to be staring across the river. "M." No response. "M!" The sprite stayed silent. "M!!" That seemed to shock her out of whatever funk she was in, as she quickly climbed into the boat once again.

"You good?" Lauren asked.

"Yeah. I was just... thinking."

"Ok..." Lauren said. She quickly pulled out her sword, and cut the rope attaching them to the shore, and they started moving.

"We're coming for you, Goldie," she murmured as the current sailed them away.

Eyyy finally got the chapter out!! yayyy!!

Anyways, please let me know:

If you want to be added or removed from the taglist

If I’ve made any spelling mistakes

If I’ve made any grammar errors

Your general feedback

Your questions

If I should add any other trigger warnings.

also, please remember, reblogs are free, and if you don’t like it you can always delete the post later. it’d be a big help for my account, and thank you

Taglist: @xonar-verse

@dorkdukess

@dirty-racoon

#tw arguing #lady elisabeth melly #marigold dia #dame lauren baker #mgr #mgr story #mgr chapter five #an apology in the form of an adventure #fantasy #lgbtq+

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devourer--of--books · 4 years ago

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I’m mad about Hunter being written off and here’s why you should be too

You: wasted potential.

Me, an intellectual: ah, Hunter and Nicola’s friendship

I have strong opinions about Hunter.

Yeah, you heard me right.

Look, I have strong opinions about many, many, things. Today, we are taking a dive on Hunter and Nicola. First I’d like to blame this post on Kate, as I decided to make it after I tried to articulate why Hunter being written off TCY makes me so angry in a huge comment under her latest OTK post but it ended up being too big and messy so I deleted it. I don’t think I’ve seen anyone elaborate on it, so if you were also mad about this, bro, not to be intense, but like, are we soulmates or...??

Before anything else, as I usually do with my text posts (which I haven’t done in a while, opsies), I shall provide you with arguably unnecessary context. Sit down, grab yourself some snacks, make yourself at home, I’m about to rant you into oblivion.

Since I know many accounts weren’t around back then, I’ll also give you the socio-political vibes of the time period, as any self-respecting half-baked essay written last minute should.

POV, you’re 14/15 year-old me. You flat iron your hair, you don’t use sunscreen, you think you’re straight and your school makes you wear those horrid low rise uniform pants, but at least you can somewhat do your make-up decently now that you grew out of your emo phase.

The year was 2016. The Ever Never Handbook has just come out. You re-watch the handbook trailer on youtube for the fifteenth time. Everyone is losing their minds over OcTObeR 14tH and “a student named Agatha ~ now Agatha of Camelot~”, as well as the portraits and the teasing for a new SGE book. Quests For Glory is announced just a few days later. 2016 tagatha ship week happens a few months down the line.

This is the SGE Tumblr Fandom Peak.

Now, let’s start right there, two-ish weeks after the release of the Handbook, right as the QFG announcement comes out.

We all knew Soman wasn’t done with SGE after TLEA. He definitely had been teasing something in his weekly blogs (lol, remember when I used to check the blog, what a time to be alive) and once we got the ENH, we got quite lot of info to theorize. Here’s some that I can think off the top of my head:

- The coven was going on a mission to find a new School Master.

- Tedros and Agatha were struggling financially in Camelot but were going to get married soon (even if Sophie doubted Tedros would have asked Agatha yet, as of the time of the Ever Never RoundTable, but we’re taking that with a grain of salt, because she was written to sound jealous here, and I won’t acknowledge that kinda of bs, she is happy for her friends okay, we’ve been though this-)

- Sophie had completely remodeled the School For Evil and was getting on Dovey and the rest of the faculty’s nerves (except for newly hired history teacher, Hort).

- The rest of the supporting cast had just graduated third year and was to be off in quests soon.

- The School was now accepting applications, and two of those applicants are Nicola and Bogden.

Now, I’m not even gonna bring up how it was mentioned in a video in EverNeverTv that Bogden would be an important character in TCY, and yet, I can’t think of anything relevant about him other than the fact that he knew tarot apparently, or how his application had more personality than him in the entire series, or how he was basically there so we could look at him and Willam and be like “oh, representation”, or how he’d be a good insight on how Galvadon perceives Sophie and Agatha post-TLEA, or- I’m just not gonna.

Oh, no. Instead, we are here to discuss Nicola’s application.

If your memory is foggy, let me remind you:

Nicola’s application is submitted, according to the Handbook, by her friend, Hunter. For convenience sake, we’ll assume Hunter is a guy (I’ll tell you why Hunter being a guy works better for me in a bit), but his gender is not mentioned anywhere in the ENH. I don’t think he has been gendered in any version (correct me if I’m wrong) or if there are any pronouns for him during TCY, but I’m fairly confident he isn’t mentioned at all.

Hunter tells us he is applying on Nic’s behalf, as she’d never apply for herself. He mentions that she is more or less the Galvadon equivalent of an activist for women’s rights, founding a rugby unisex team and campaigning for pants instead of skirts for the local school uniform, as well as having a feminist sounding book as her favorite book. It’s heavily implied that she is a jock, as he lists that, if marooned on a desert island, Nicola would want to have a soccer ball, a hockey stick and a set of dumbbells (“and none of this 5-lb nonsense”) with her.

Upon asked why Nicola should go to the school, his answer is: “because there’s a greater place for her in the world, where she can learn a girl’s true worth, and I don’t think it’s here.”

Then you have a note from (*rolls eyes* *suppresses a gag* *tears hair out*) the very late, long, long gone, absolutely dead, August Sader, telling the Deans to accept her application, despite having no reason to do so, as Nicola was to “play a crucial role in it’s [the school’s] survival.” Dovey and Sophie agree to flip a coin to decide which school will take her, which Sophie must have lost, as Nicola is accepted into the School For Evil.

By now, I think we all agree that Nicola was done dirty. If you check my QFG re-read you’ll notice that I complained about her there. As I had to go though her introduction chapter again to make this post, let me tell you why: Nicola wasn’t written to be likeable.

She simply wasn’t. That’s the one conclusion I can draw. Whether that’s intentional or not, I can’t tell, but the backlash she received was fairly useful, as it meant Soman could write her off the main story without much backlash from his target audience (aka, not us, pesky pretentious older readers).

The Nicola I was introduced to, not only in the Handbook but on her trailer for QFG was not the girl on QFG.

Nic is there to be the smart girl™, and while I do appreciate having a character who is a bit cocky about their brains, it just doesn’t work well there. Because her bond to other characters and the way she earns their respect feels so weak, she just comes across as pretentious. Characters like Hester and Agatha, who are supposed to be smart, feel dumbed down to show us how clever Nicola is. Agatha is supposed to be the resourceful thinker and Hester wanted to be class captain, you bet she studied like crazy, she probs knows every fairytale in existence.

Then you add that to the (*rolls eyes* *suppresses a gag* *tears hair out*) Nicola and Hort fiasco and Nic feels like a weirdly written OC insert.

Handbook!Nicola sounded like a smart jock kind of character (read, more Gryffindor than Ravenclaw). Handbook!Nic was a Reader who read the tales as a hobby, but her favorite book is not a tale, it’s a non-fiction book (as far as I can tell). She might not be the fairytale expert, but she sounds like a practical thinker, as sport requires strategy, which is not Hester’s strong suit, given she is rather impulsive, or Agatha’s, given she is often unwilling to make hard decisions due to her Good nature and her own insecurities. C’mon, Handbook!Nic would have taken one look at Hort and sent him running to hills, because she would be able to smell his bs three miles away. She’s no one’s replacement, least of all Sophie’s (whom she probably would not have gotten along with (at least they got this part right) given Sophie’s “my prince will sweep me away from an ordinary life” phylosophy). To be honest she doesn’t sound like she’d be interested in dating at all.

But this post is about Hunter right? Let me remind you, Hunter is not mentioned in Nicola’s introduction, when she talks about her life in Galvadon. Canon!Nicola tells us that she has two brothers who want to inherit her father’s pub in order to sell the place, but Nicola is close with her father and likes working there to some extent, even if she has bigger ambitions. She believes her brothers sent her application as a way to get rid of her.

Back when I still had some faith that Soman had an arc for Nicola that included resolution, I had my theories as to why she wouldn’t mention Hunter: maybe he was to appear in later books and they’d have a huge backstory explaining their friendship, as well as a dramatic confession that Hunter sent her application because he felt Nicola deserved to live an adventure, and Nicola would either realize that she was meant for something more or that she wanted to live a quiet life, honestly either would be nice. I would have taken anything. Truly, if Nicola’s k-pop boyfriend in the OTK epilogue had been replaced with Hunter, I might be able to hate it less.

Especially if they came to the (*rolls eyes* *suppresses a gag* *tears hair out*) school wedding as friends. Because you know what?

We are starved for male-female friendships in the SGE universe.

Tedros’s only female friends (all his friends in general) are Agatha’s friends (who all tried to get rid of him at some point, save for maybe Dot) and his actual friends are all dead (Bettina/Chaddick). Hort could be counted as Agatha’s friend, if only he didn’t bash her every five seconds like a moron (he literally pitched the idea that Agatha should be executed by Tedros in OTK, just because he was envious or her relationship with Sophie (not jealous, envious, because Sophie wasn’t his to begin with)) over his delusional sense entitlement of Sophie’s affections (which I hate, but as this is not a Hort-bashing post, I won’t get too much into), but the coven, Beatrix, Renna and co. would not touch him with a stick. Merlin’s friendship with Lady Of The Lake is gone, and Dovey is dead. Rhian and Kei both had that frenemies thing with Sophie in ACOT/beggining of OTK, but I think it was supposed to be romantic? It wasn’t ew (I hate Rhian but he’s also wasted potential, and so was Kei, whom I liked, rest in peace). Japeth hates women for??? Whatever. Willam and Bodgen are such background characters I could not care less about them. The new students weren’t memorable enough for me to remember their names. I think this about covers the main male cast.

There’s a lack of male friendships too, but we kinda have (*rolls eyes* *suppresses a gag* *tears hair out*) Tort and whatever was that rushed Tedros/Chaddick friendship. Rhian and Kei were gay friends (yeah, right, sure, very platonic). Tedros and Rhian could have been friends if Rhian redeemed himself, but otherwise no. Tedros and Filip… gay. Japeth literally killed Rhian, so also not very good friendship between brothers. Hort has no friends, because Ravan would so not be here for his bs. Willam and Bogden are a couple and (*rolls eyes* *suppresses a gag* *tears hair out*) so were Aric and Japeth, I guess.

Still don’t believe Hunter was wasted potential? Okay, let me tell you what my ideal Nicola arc would be, mixing Handbook!Nicola with some canon!Nicola and including Hunter.

- Nicola is the one inheriting the pub (once she gets married), despite Galvadon’s pre-TLEA sexism and conservative views, because she is her father’s only child and her brothers are actually her older half-siblings from her mother’s previous marriage.

- Her mom died at some point early in her childhood. Not a childbirth tho, because Callis, local witch gynecologist (have you checked my post on this yet? no? you should) was there for her, even if it was a high risk pregnancy because the mom was already older.

- Because of that, Nicola’s father actually sells bread to Callis for cheaper prizes, but don’t tell the elders, shhh

- Anyway, because her mom was gone so early, Nicola was raised by her dad, brothers and by the employees (mostly men, as I don’t think it was all that common for women to work jobs in Galvadon) of her father’s pub. Due to being a girl, most guys weren’t willing to befriend her (sexism, am I right), but because she was a tomboy she had difficulty bonding with the other girls at school, even when they weren’t outright hostile (cof cof Sophie).

- Example: she and Belle had a tentative bond over their love of cooking, but often ran out of things to talk about and the conversation fell flat.

- Which is how she ends up befriending Hunter.

- Hunter is the only boy in a family of many girls and his father works all day. He has a good heart and is rather emotional, but he always feels like he has something to prove, which leads him to being rather impulsive. Both Nicola and Hunter love sports and are very competitive people. Once Nicola gains his respect, he feels very protective of her and often feels the need to stand up for her, even if she doesn’t need it.

- Nicola knows Hunter feels overlooked in his family, so she is always inviting him over and taking care of him, keeping him out of trouble. Her father begins to see him as his own son, and soon he spends more time at Nicola’s house than at his own.

- Everyone thinks they’ll get married some day. His sisters tease him mercilessly about it, and so does Nic’s father, but frankly, Nic and Hunter see each other as family.

- You can bet Hunter is the one teaching Nic about periods after asking his sisters, so she wouldn’t have to suffer with Galvadon’s horrid Sex Ed. (go check the Callis headcanon’s okay, give me clout, that it my favorite post I’ve ever made)

- They tried to kiss once. Nicola vomited and Hunter gaged.

- Hunter is Nicola’s number one supporter and fan, 100% had those gender-equality pins she made for her campaigns all over his bags and jackets.

- Since most wedding matches are arranged by the elders before girls even graduate, it was settled that Nic and Hunter would get married to each other and then inherit the pub. It would of course, be a secretly platonic match and they would suspiciously have no children (Nicola even had a plan to visit Callis to get a potion for infertility, just in case the elders wanted to check on her... okay, I’ll stop).

- Hunter doesn’t tell her, but Nicola knows he wants to marry for love and have a family of his own. She tries to talk him out of marrying her, but he insists that he would be doing it out of love for her, even if not romantic, because Nic didn’t deserve to be matched up with some stranger she barely knows who would no doubt be less tolerant of her more radical views.

- She tells him it’d be fine for him to have a affairs then, but he insists he would never do that to her, because people would talk about Nic if that was the case and her reputation would be ruined.

- The night of Sophie and Agatha kidnapping Nicola tells him she would rather be taken to the School than to stay there and make him live an unhappy life.

- Hunter is horrified (remember, everyone thought going to the school was a fate worse than death) and makes her promise to never treat her life so fickly.

- Sophie and Agatha get taken, come back, but during Tedros’ reign of terror in Galvadon, right before they return to the Woods, Nicola’s father grows very very sick.

- Nic thinks he’s going to die, and she frets, not only because they’re close but also because she can’t inherit the place if she doesn’t marry Hunter. But, well, she sort of always knew, but now that feels very real, she thought she had some more time before that.

- They set a date for the wedding, but thankfully, Tedros and Agatha’s escape ends up causing the ceremony to be delayed.

- By the time the new date is set, there’s no more elders and Stefan is now mayor.

- But just because he is the mayor doesn’t mean the law and the sexism is gone overnight.

- Nic’s father is getting somewhat better, but she is still very worried about him, because of his old age.

- Once SGE starts having applications and has been proved to be, well, somewhat safe, Hunter suggests that Nicola applies, but after the scare that she might lose her father sooner rather than later, she tells him she can’t bring herself to leave him.

- Hunter doesn’t want her to throw her life away, specially now knowing that in the Endless Woods there were people like her and that progress would get there before it ever got to Galvadon

- (He also wants to not marry someone he views as a sister, pls).

- So he files her application in secret.

- Nicola gets accepted, upon Sader’s request and Sophie’s bad luck, into the School For Evil. She and Sophie still don’t get along, the Evil castle rejects her and she gets pushed to Good, becoming an Ever, but she’s only staying until Christmas, because she is worried sick about her father.

- She thinks the application was a plot from her brothers because she doesnt think Hunter would ever betray her trust like that, after she specifically told him she wouldn't go.

- There’s no Hicola, instead, she and Hort become friends and she talks him out of his delusions with Sophie, because as much as Nicola dislikes her, Sophie was a girl too, and deserved to have her feelings respected.

- She also punches Hort into giving up his envy of Tedros and Agatha while at it, because she is just that efficient.

- Everything else up to OTK can be pretty much the same because I can’t remember what happens, other than everytime Nicola is smart girl™, it’s not “because she reads”, but because she is practical.

- Example: on the boat scene where she very pretentiously sasses Agatha for not saying hello to her (canon!Nicola, girl, she just suffered six months of loneliness at Camelot because Tedros shut her out and is now on a quest to save her happy ending, probs didn’t get much sleep, maybe cut her some slack) and then tells her how to sail a boat (despite the fact that there are no boats in Galvadon and I’m sure you can’t just read Peter Pan and learn to sail a boat, unless I did it wrong or something, maybe the storian version comes with a crash course). Here, instead, Nicola presses Hort (who is a pirate’s son) to remember literally anything to help them (therefore making him not completely useless on this quest), and he does and they tell Agatha and she’s like sure and does it.

- Now, in OTK, I literally can’t remember where Nicola was for most of it and I read that book not too long ago, so I’m worried.

- Okay, so, have the Knights Of Eleven actually serve some purpose, include a scene where Tedros and Nicola stress-play rugby and get her some internal conflict.

- Nic now loves this world. She just spent the last few weeks fighting to protect it. She is now a Knight, and she loves the adventures and the new friends she made. Can she really go back to Gavaldon to take care of a pub? Well, she needs to, doesn’t she? That’s what a good daughter would do.

- After Japeth’s execution, Nic goes straight home.

- Her father’s condition is stable, as he is being treated by Hunter and his new wife.

- Oh boy, Hunter has some explaining to do.

- Nicola is furious that he broke her trust, but at the same time, she’s happy he’s happy and well, Hunter what do you have to say for yourself?

- “Damn, Nic, nice armour- ouch, my arm!”

- Apparently, since Nicola was taken, Stefan approved a law for people to be able to leave their inheritance to whomever they wanted. And since Nic was gonna be at the Woods, her father was more than happy to leave it to Hunter. Of course, unless Nicola wanted to stay at Gavaldon.

- Does she? She’s not sure.

- Hunter and Nicola attend the tagatha wedding at Camelot (what, like I wasn’t gonna fix this part?), Hunter is Nic’s plus one.

- There, Hester, Anadil and Dot show her Sader’s note, and ask her, not to become School Master, but to become Dean Of Good, because she would be perfect for the new brand of Good to match Sophie’s Evil. You know, since she is all for gender-equality, good manners, practicality and was particularly good at dealing with Sophie’s bs.

- Since Tedros has the Storian Ring, the pen doesn’t need actual protection, well, not more than it can get from Nic and Sophie.

- Sophie herself insists that Nicola accept the position, not because she doesn’t want to be alone at the school now that Hort and Dovey are dead, no, of course not, since when did Sophie ever need anyone, she was just asking cause… cause Nicola looked lonely. The pretty boy who came with her was not her boyfriend, was he? Sophie was prettier than him anyway. Who needs a boy when they can have her?

- Whether they become a couple or not, I’ll let you decide.

- Bonus: years later, Hunter’s eldest daughter is accepted at the School for Good. Nicola is her godmother, and her favoritism shows.

There, if nothing else, the reason you should be mad about Hunter and the Handbook in general is because this didn’t happen.

#school for good and evil #The School for Good and Evil #nicola of woods beyond #Sophie of Woods Beyond #Hunter of Woods Beyond

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