#I’ll always be an insomnia buddy because I don’t go to bed until at least 4am

[skyloftian-nutcase]

[grumbles, waking up after finally getting some sleep] argblargh. Migraine. Lovely. No school for me today, then. [pops down a couple Excedrin]

I should probably head out so y'alls don't catch my cold. Take care & thanks for the help. 😊👍🏻 [heads back to my own place]

Sky: *snoring* HC Sky, stretching and yawning: Sure, any—wait, when did you get in here??

[lettrespromises]

KUROO, AKAASHI AND ATSUMU - TAKE MY HEART WITH YOU.

@luveranime​ wrote : ❝ Heyyy! Could you do one where kuroo and akaashi and atsumu are leaving to another country for volleyball purposes and they have to say goodbye to their s/o?🥺🥺 ❞ A.N :  ❝ Dear reader,  this is my first request and i’m nervous as heck, i’m trying really hard not to scream right now. anywhoopsie! i tried to make these both sad and fluffy because all my posts are kind of angsty and i don’t want to be pinned as a heartbreaker. i had so much fun writing this so thank you so much for requesting, sending lots of love and kisses your way! mwah!  Sincerely yours, Nikki ❞ Genre: Kinda sad, kinda fluffy. Warnings: Bits of crying, mentions of sex but no actual smut (post time-skip for Atsumu).

Kuroo is the type of person who gets emotionally attached slowly, but once he’s attached to you, there’s no going back. His passion is unmatched (yes I may be writing this because he’s a scorpio and so am I), meaning that he will pour every ounce of love he possesses into your relationship.

He loves hard and will always put you before anything else. As a matter of fact, you were the one who had to force him to go abroad to study new volleyball techniques and come back as a better, more experienced player.

It took forever to convince him though. He felt guilty for leaving you behind and as stated before, you come before anything else, including volleyball. (Lucky you, he’s putting his first love after you.)

As much as he is excited to meet new players, learn new ways to be a more efficient middleblocker and discover a new country, his excitation counterbalances with the thought of leaving you. He’s both looking forward and dreading leaving Japan, and you in the process. 

The latter causes him to lack slumber, he has terrible insomnias because his emotions are tearing him apart. Thankfully, you’re here to whisper sweet nothings to him and secure him in your embrace to make him fall back asleep (although, the few nights leading to his departure often result in him squeezing the life out of you when you’re sleeping, send help.)

The atmosphere of the ride to the airport is very close to pure denial. You’re both singing until ripping your vocal cords, his palm has found a permanent place upon your thigh, sometimes he squeezes your flesh to print this sensation into his head because deep down he knows this is the last time he gets to see you and touch you before a long time.

At the airport, you’re the kind of cliché couple to melt into each other’s embrace amidst comforting silence. You both feel like you’re all alone in the airport, like there’s nobody else there.

Your hands grip his Nekoma jacket hard, as if your life was depending on it, but after all, you just needed to keep this feeling with you at all costs- the feeling of your boyfriend’s toned arms around your waist, squeezing you like there’s no tomorrow while you keep your eyes shut.

Kuroo, on the other one hand, runs his digits through your hair in a comforting manner and delivers occasional pecks on the crown of your hair. 

However, you both know it’s time (although you might have been trying to purposefully make Kuroo miss his flight), which results in Kuroo saying “Kitten, I know it’s hard but I have to go now.”, cue your cute self looking at him with pleading eyes. “Don’t give me this look, baby, I hate this as much as you do.”

He envelops your cheeks with both of his gigantic palms and presses one final kiss upon your lips, it’s everything you wanted and represented Kuroo so well- passionate, caring, both soft and rough on the edges. His thumbs wipe away the tears crashing down on your cheeks, once he pulls away due to the lack of oxygen, he doesn’t miss to slap your butt because... Kuroo...

Upon leaving, he puts his Nekoma jacket upon your shoulders while flashing you his toothiest smile : “I’ve always thought you rocked it better than me, kitten.” 

As he makes his way to the main hall, he looks back at you and mouths a very touching “I love you, I’ll be back to you soon.” and blows a kiss your way, you stare at him and squeeze his jacket against your chest, at least you have a new cuddle buddy as a replacement.

Ahh, Akaashi, or as I like to call him: agASHEHHHH.

It’s safe to say that he is the polar opposite of Kuroo regarding display of affection. Love with Akaashi echoes to comfortable silence, but that certainly does not mean he wouldn’t get the moon for you if you asked.

Akaashi becomes unconsciously a bit more distant and a bit more silent the week leading up to his departure. He thinks that gradually separating himself from you will hurt you less once he’s gone, he just wants his absence to cause you as little pain as possible.

You, on the other one hand, get quite frustrated with this semi-silent treatment. He doesn’t come at your place as often, he cuts the conversations short and says he’s too busy with Bokuto-san to hang out with you. 

The truth of the matter is, he’s hurting so much from the inside, and this idea of his is just eating him alive. It eats him alive because you’re away, and he’s the one blocking you off. He absolutely hates the way he’s acting.

Hence why, the day before of his departure, he crashes at your place with takeout, a bouquet of everlasting flowers and all the good stuff to have the perfect movie night.

Needless to say, you’re shocked once you see him and all these things he brought specifically for you. He takes time to carefully explain why he chose to bring you all of this: he ordered this peculiar takeout because it’s your favorite, he got you this bouquet of everlasting flowers so you can have a permanent proof of his love for you and the full ‘movie night’ equipment to light up the mood of this fatidical night.

Although he doesn’t really initiate any kind of affectionate touches, this night is the total opposite- he delivers pecks everywhere on your face, envelops you safely into his embrace, plays with your hair while you’re watching the movie and whispers a few “I love you so much.” in the crook of your neck.

Eventually, you both fall asleep and he carries you bridal style to your bed where you both spend the night together, comforted by each other’s embrace.

Akaashi insisted on going to the airport alone, the will to cause you as little as possible still embedded in his brain. Thus, he leaves you while you’re sleeping and admires you one last time before delivering a sweet peck on your forehead and whispers “I’ll be back before you can say it, dove.”

Once you wake up, you pat the other half of your bed only to realize you’re alone and Akaashi has already left. However, there’s a curious bag next to your bed. As you open it up, you realize it’s filled with Akaashi’s clothing and his signature smell is locked in within the fabric, there are also a bunch of neatly handwritten notes for each day he’s gonna be without you. All of them are reminders of your qualities, how much he loves you and memories of your dates with polaroid pictures.

 Upon seeing all these precious things specially prepared for you, you go back to sleep, hugging his pillow close to your chest with a soft smile on your face, Akaashi’s favorite smile.

Oh well, now this is a wild one.

Dating a professional volleyball has its pros and cons, and needless to say, the biggest disadvantage of dating Atsumu is how often he needs to go abroad to play against a foreign team. 

Now, of course you’re his number one fan and rightfully so and Atsumu asks you to come with him all the time but you can’t just leave your professional life aside, hence why it’s always bittersweet when he has to leave.

However, if it’s bittersweet to you, to Atsumu, it’s the best occasion to tease the hell out of you because you pout every time he brings up the fact he has to travel to another country. Cue the inevitable “Aw, is somebody gonna miss me or what?” and the obvious wink sent your way.

Teasing you is a way to make you crack a smile or laugh, which indirectly makes you forget about his trip for work or at least it makes it less painful because you’ve been laughing so much with your boyfriend. And to Atsumu, it’s the perfect way to capture a few candid pictures of your beautiful grin so he can admire them all once he’s far away from you.

Now, I hate to state the obvious but when I said that Atsumu is a wild one... I meant it. Hence why the night before his departure, he always makes sure to please you in bed and make you scream him name, because God knows when he will be able to do it again and hear such a sinful melody coming out of your mouth.

He does insist on you coming to the airport with him, and there again, he’s a wild one : Atsumu has no shame in making out with you right there, right now in the airport in front of the incredulous looks of the passengers around you.

He won’t hesitate and honestly has no shame regarding public display of affection : open mouthed kisses, trails of kisses left on your neck, a hand adventuring on your derrière, hell, even hickeys if he’s feeling like it.

Atsumu takes pride in leaving a few love bites, it’s a literal physical reminder that even though he’s not here with you, you know who you belong to. And nothing makes him smile more than imagining you staring at your reflection in the mirror once the bruises have healed up.

Nonetheless, the full make out session is broken by none other than the MSBY Black Jackal team’s obvious coughs, you know, a way to say “Hey, lovebirds, we don’t actually want to assist to the creation of a baby live in an airport and we kinda have to go.”

Both you and Atsumu know it’s time to part ways... But not before he plants a series of kisses on your plump lips and whisper a succession of “I love you so much, babygirl” or other “I’m gonna miss you so much, you have no idea”, orrrrr “You drive me crazy, baby.” and eventually the obvious “I can’t wait to make you walk weird for three days straight once I come back, princess.”

Eventually, you wave at Atsumu with a shy grin plastered upon your face, now that everything he said to you has sunk in, in return, he blows an obnoxious kiss your way. 

Once he returns to the team, Kiyoomi keeps his distance, even more so than usual because, I quote, “Do you have any idea of how many bacterias are shared in a kiss, Miya? 80 millions, which gives me 80 millions to stay away from you.” cue Atsumu replying with a smirk “I don’t regret a single one of these bacterias you’re talking about, totally worth it.”

[albino-whumpee]

The boss´ herding dog

You can thank insomnia for this one. Also, my need to show an aspect of Albus I´m DYING to explore on the arc after For you. This is a few weeks after the whole photos fiasco. Sann has barely started to learn sign language so he will sound a bit cut(?).

Taglist: @castielamigos-whump-side-blog @giggly-evil-puppy @cowboysrappin @haro-whumps @burtlederp @neuro-whump @comfortforthepain @whumps-the-word @whole-and-apart-and-between @broken-horn @ashintheairlikesnow @rosesareviolentlyread  @starnight-whump @just-a-whumping-racoon-with-wifi @as-a-matter-of-whump  @whumpasaurus101 @grizzlie70 @twistedcaretaker

CW// Slavery, dehumanization, suggestive language to taunt, manhandling, blood, angry caretaker, workplace bullying, conditioning, pet whump, mentioned ableism and negative views on stimming, mentioned past noncon and fucky victim self blaming (it was necessary kind of fucky)

It was odd for him to show the collar around. People stared, people whispered. Albus would hear them talk about him on his back all the time now. But he would keep working. As it was what his owner bought him for. He knew that. He knew it and yet…

“Do you really have to go, Tony?” He asked the man putting his things inside a cardboard box. As he scratched his wrist over the leather band Sasha gave him to cover the number. He frowned at the clean desk, the walls that had been decorated with flyers ideas and visual references, the drawer with his snacks too were gone. All fitted inside the trash bag the lady had put into her cart a few moments ago.

It was a quick clean up so the box was almost empty. His analogue clock, his sketchbooks, his computer, tablet, photos of Sasha and him, of his family and even one that included him looking awkward as Sasha hugged him and Tony took the photo with his phone.

It was funny how much of a life could fit inside a box.

The man shrugged, pulling the box over the empty desk. “I hit the boss’ son. I have to, buddy” Albus lowered his head. If he hadn’t…he shook his head. There wouldn’t have been a party in the first place if he hadn’t. He had been good, but sometimes, it wasn’t enough to be more than that. Tony’s wide hand squeezed his shoulder “It’s not your fault, Al. I promise I hit that bastard because he deserved it. But is annoying because I didn’t have a brick to build him a prettier face” he joked making the albino smile. The other smiled too, opening his arms “Hey, Al can I hug you? I’m gonna miss you man”

The albino didn’t need to be asked, not from him. But it felt good to know he had an option. “Im gonna miss you too” Albus pulled his arms around his waist and squeezed. Sinking on his chest. After a moment they pulled apart and Tony dig through his things to take out the bags of snacks to put them on his arms. “Sasha will keep them on her office now”

“You know she’s never there”

Tony grimaced “But she lets her office open. You can take them and come to have lunch with us” Albus mouth opened to say Zarai wouldn’t- hadn’t allowed him to do that. Even if he went grocery shopping with his ID… “I talked with her. With miss Montenegro. She said it’s alright if you came with us. Just to notify her before you go” Tony smiled. He had his jaw on the floor. Always helping him like that… he couldn’t help but go for another hug.

“Thank you” the albino muttered as the man ruffled his hair.

“And how’s Sann? Everything going ok?” Albus scratched his neck as Tony sat on the chair. They still had time before the new guy came. Tony crossed his arms “He’s having a hard time isn’t it?”

“He’s adapting…slowly…”

They had been eating on the floor with Sann for a while now. Until they could get him to sit at the table. “It was a full conversation to tell him to not be naked in the house...and that he could sleep in my bed alone without...earning it...” that made a vein pop out Tony’s forehead.

“That pervert bastard” he said through gritted teeth.

“Yeah… At least he’s doing very well with Sasha’s lessons. Told me about this new book he´s reading in signs!” the albino smiled remembering how happy he had looked to see them come back the first few days. The book pile over his nightstand growing and growing as the days went by. For some reason calculus text books from Zarai’s days at college and an old encyclopedia had caught his attention.

It had become normal for him to work on the laptop on the studio’s sofa and have Sann sitting next to him on the floor reading. Sometimes, he mindlessly hanged his arm only to find Sann leaning on to it. He had tried not to touch him, to pull away, but he had caught his hand and pulled it to his head. Sloppily signed it felt good when he did that.

“And how are you feeling?” Tony suddenly asked taking him by surprise. His face was knit with a bit of worry.

Albus forced a smile “I’ll be fine” he replied. The other hummed.

“Don’t forget Jeremy is also there and half the trainees adore you. If you need help” Albus nodded bitterly. Lee had stopped talking to them entirely. Wouldn’t listen to her tasks unless another person told her. A few people had become like that towards him now.

Because he was a box boy and would always act keeping his owner´s pleasure in mind like a loyal dog, he had heard them say. And they were right. He had been trained to have his owner’s safety as his maximum priority. If Zarai was in danger, he wouldn’t doubt a second to switch places.

Albus had to say goodbye to Tony that day to welcome days of dealing with the aftermath of what Robert had provoked.

Dealing with people letting things slip carelessly just to see him try to catch it, bossing him around, laughing when he did all the tasks, when it was “just a joke”. Having almost a heart attack upon finding a dog plate full with dog food over his desk with a note that said “for the boss’ puppy” he had to throw away and clean before Zarai saw it. Going to more public zones was tricky now. He was fine with the rumors. But hearing two trainees talk about their lack of promotions and suddenly seeing him enter the room to use the copying machine went really uncomfortable when he overheard one sigh.

“At least I don’t get deals by making my pet sleep with them” Albus hand crunched the pages on his hand and slammed them on the machine before he turned to them. Recognizing the dirty blonde who had talked as Galván. A guy who had graduated from a top college because his parents could afford it with pocket money and worked there because his uncle made a few calls.

“Ma’am´s position was earnt through her own hard work and years of experience. I would be very happy to remind you, you will need either her or my signature to have your degree after four years of dropping college, so you can find any other job than just an internship someone gave you” the guys snorted.

“What? Puppy boy can actually bark?” The other guy went, a black haired guy with a wiry body type and at least two heads taller than him. He vaguely reminded him of handler Harry. His primary handler. The one who supervised his whole training, and the one to make him stop circling his thumbs, wiggle his leg or tap when he was nervous. Until eventually it came back and Zarai said nothing. They started rounding him “Look at you, acting like you own the place” one of them reached to his neck and Albus stayed still as he uncovered the collar. Digging his nails into his hand “but you’re just the herd dog. Looking after your Master’s sheeps”

“By that logic, I guess the sheep should know they’re below the dog’s watch” the guy felt a chill seeing Albus’s crimson eyes gleam darkly. A grin crept to his face as he firmly put the guy´s hand away. “You were so slow at the beginning and asked me for help for something that took me two days to learn. It was me who helped you not get fired in your first week, wasn’t it? The dog with no degree” the guy scrunched his nose. Albus felt strange as something coiled inside his stomach and a white stinging pain formed behind his eyes “You better not stray from the herd and stay where I can see you”

“Shut up” the guy said pathetically, amusing Albus.

“Shut up what? Remember your manners” and Albus was bitterly reminded of training. Of the white rooms and the men who smiled when they shoved him to his knees. Who lifted his chin up and mouthed his instructions. The same he was saying now, echoing through his memories “You will refer to your superiors with respect. And when they ask you to do something, whatever it may be, your only reply will be “yes, sir” understood?”

The other guy laughed at his friend. Picked his ribs before turning to Albus again.

“Well, aren’t you sharp? My uncle’s boxie is a dumb domestic who can’t even clean a spot right. Just mindlessly begs to be forgiven all the time” there was something on his smirk that made Albus’ skin crawl “he became a lot more fun when they taught him how he could be useful as a romantic” the boy´s eyes sparked with malice “Heard all the ordeal with the CEO’s pet and you, sir” Albus froze “But I need to know from you, sir. Do you herd him too?” He took a step closer to Albus in that same suffocating air as the handlers. Albus tried to control his breathing. It would be fine. Their conversation had gathered a few faces, as well. Quietly amusing themselves with the show “Do you make the Romantic say “yes, ma’am” to her when she’s using him? Or do you make him say that to you only? I heard you were a romantic too, so maybe, you’re just teaching him how she likes it so he can join in? Or maybe, he’s worse than that? He’s your pet sir?”

—

The sound of her heels made faces on the crowd watch on her direction. Many of them running away as soon as they spotted her. Giving her freeway to the middle of all the commotion.

“Take it back!” She heard Albus scream eraged, so atypical from him. It was a surprise to see Albus being held back by a trainee as another stood before him with his knuckles peeled red and covering his bloody nose. Two guys restraining him harder as they saw her. Albus spit a bit of blood as he shouted “You know nothing about him! Take it back!” He jerked against the guy restraining him.

“Mister Serra stop!” the blonde trainee said putting his all into not letting go even as he squirmed so violently. Kicks in the air just to get an inch closer.

“NO! He has no right to say that about him! He doesn’t know shit about us! None of you do!” He screamed at the top of his lungs “Let- ngh, Let me go Jeremy!” He said through gritted teeth. “I need to knock some sense up that stupid head of-“

“Hear this out, the dog wanting to explain to me about a cocksleeve!” He cut him, just making Albus fight harder.

“Enough!” She hollered coming to his line of sight. Freezing them completely. Some people had taken out their cameras and she snatched one phone out of their hands. “What is this? A high school quarrel? You’re adults in the working force, gentlemen” she let it sink, seeing how Albus went stiff and trembled since the moment he spotted her. Zarai turned her head to the trainee with the bloody nose “We wont send some little piece of paper for your parents to sign, you go straight out” Albus eyebrows knit in horror stopping to struggle.

“No, please wait, ma’am” he whispered shakily as Jeremy balanced letting him go.

“I dont even need to know who started. you’re fired. Get your stuff out now” she said pointing to the widened eyed trainee as Albus suddenly collapsed on the floor. “All of you better erase those videos right now unless you are sure you can face the consequences.” She growled loud enough for the crowd to let a thick quiet settle. She knelt in front of Albus and he flinched wildly when she approached her fingers to his neck.

“Pl-Please, please no. Im, I, Im sorry, please! he, he said-“ he covered the collar with his hands. Trying to keep her from taking it away.

“I dont care what he said” she terminated before she took a napkin Jeremy handed her “Im not gonna take it away, are you ok? You took quite the hit there” he nodded slowly, somewhat relieved but not taking away his hand from his neck just yet. Albus kept looking at the ground as she wiped away some of the blood off his mouth. He saw her stand and talk again to the half dispersed crowd. “Most of you don’t know me very well yet. But have clear that I do not take lightly when my property is damaged and much less when the most capable member of my team has to endure your childish behavior” Albus head sank slowly as she kept talking. Nodding when Jeremy asked if he was alright and helped him up “I thought better of you. But you have proven to me not worthy of that right. I’ve had enough of this situation” she eyed every single frowned face, every guilty and compliant. “If I hear, or see, something like this happens again, or I find any of you trying to start a fight or bullying others, I will have them personally seen outside the building after signing their resignation letter and put you on the blacklist of candidates myself. Are we clear?”

“But what about-“

“Are we clear, Miss Lee?” Zarai directed to the black haired girl among the crowd. She stared at the ground while she nodded “Whoever refuses to accept this can come to my office to explain and sign their resignation. Thats all. Disperse”

She watched them walk away, before she turned to Albus “Follow me”

The albino´s heart leapt before he walked after her with his head down. His heart drummed at each step and seemed to halt to a stop when she opened the door for him. Albus stared into her eyes, but as many other times, she was unreadable when she cocked her head.

Clenching his jaw, he stepped inside and heard the door close behind him.

He had fucked up.

He had completely broken her trust in him and he would finally be punished.

What was he thinking? Mistakes weren´t allowed.

Zarai walked past him to a small cabinet behind her desk, but Albus had his eyes locked in the ground. Not wanting to see what exactly she would use to punish him until she was on it.

“On the desk” she ordered still rumminating through a metallic box. The boy breathed in deep before walking to her desk with shaky legs. The uncertainty of what would come just made his heart race faster. He sat on it obediently anyways.

“M-Ma´am, I´m so sorry…” he started, fear taking the worst out of him, his hands got damped in sweat.

“I know you are” she replied calmly before pulling his chin up with soft fingers “Lift your head, hun” Without meaning to, he flinched wildly at the sight of blurry fingers over him. Zarai fished his jaw and pressed slightly on each side, to turn his head up “Hey, hey, don´t move. I know it hurts but I need you to stay still so I can put it on”  Zarai then poked his cheek with something cold, making him blink at the refreshing sensation on his skin. “Doesn´t hurt, right?”

He blinked confused at her, “L-Lidocain?” he said in the smallest voice she had ever heard.

“Uh-huh” she kept rubbing the gel over his bruising cheek. Completely frozen over the desk as she cleaned his busted lip. After a moment she closed the lid of the gel and put it back on the metallic box. He now recognized it as a first aid kit. After she put a bandaid she looked down to throw the package in the trash “You can come down now. How´s it?”

It took the boy a moment to reply, slipping off the wood desk with ease “Better…Thank you, Ma´am”

She hummed as she put the box away, sitting on her chair as the boy stood in front of her desk utterly transfixed in her calmness.

Albus kept eyeing her furtively. Worry visible as he kept rounding his thumbs. She took notice of it quickly and stopped herself from checking her computer to sigh. “Tell me”

“Im sorry for the trouble ma’am”

The woman lifted her eyes.

“No, Im sorry. I should have done this sooner, dont worry about it” she turned on her chair to face him. Lips parting and biting it for a second “You have been working for me for six months, Albus. You know better than this” the way he sank on his shoulders confirmed “I dont wanna know what they said because your reaction was probably justified. I trust you in that. But you can’t do this again, yes?”

“Yes, ma’am” he kept quiet for a minute before he dared speak up again “Ma’am?” he tried “Why wont you punish me?” She lifted an eyebrow.

“Would you want me to?”

“N-No… I mean- no, but-” the boy stammered, squeezing his hands tight as he lowered his head submissively “…But I won´t complain if you think I deserve it”

“That´s not going to happen. You did nothing that required punishment, Albus” she sighed.

“But I started…I punched him first” he admitted.

“Well…that’s certainly surprising” she found herself wondering how he had reached his face with his small height “But no. You won’t be punished for it. The guy was also getting on my nerves with that sly mouth. So maybe I should thank you”

The albino sneaked a little smile “Then…then will you keep me? Will I be able to keep working?” Zarai sighed and nodded. The albino looked shaken, capable of keeping his composure, as he went back to work later. She knew by just watching him automatically doing his chores and cleaning up when it was time to go with a blank face.

The elevator was quiet and the ride home even more. Zarai wasn’t exactly a feeler. But she knew the way his eyes were fixed on the floor as he waited for her to enter the house was empty. She gave him a headpat then. No words as she didnt even know what to say to him that would cheer him up. But still, he leaned on to it.

“Thank you, ma’am” he said when she took away her hand to open the door.

“Everything will be ok yeah?” she smiled at him before they entered the house. The boy trailing after her feeling a small blush on his cheeks. He could hear Cloude’s loud voice and smelled something very sweet. French toasts?

Sann came trotting to meet them. Wearing one of Cloude’s shirts that were too big for him and basketball shorts. He bowed to Zarai who gave him a headpat too and a smile before walking to the kitchen to greet Cloude.

“French toasts arent breakfast?” She teased.

“Time is a social construction. Its 10 am somewhere” Cloude thought french toasts were for breakfast too, but Sann had never tried them and frankly possibly neither Albus. Prepared them? Yeah for training surely. Eat them? Not so sure “Just a lil something after a hard day” he said to her before she gave him a kiss on the cheek.

The freckled boy smiled wide before he spotted the bruise on his cheek.

“What happened?” He signed worry flooding his face as Albus shifted uncomfortably. Taking off his leather band as he remembered what the other guy had said. Anger threatening to come back. Sann noticed his knuckles were bruised too. “Hurts?”

“Nothing important” Albus shrugged. Looking away “Dont worry, it was just a scratch. but it looks ugly because…albinos bruise easily…” he said every word slower than the last, as his bitterness leaked through his words. Waiting for him to nod, to sign yes, for anything but him softly soothing his swollen knuckles.

“Easy or not, bruises still hurt” he signed as an affirmation, eyes losing focus to wonder back on memories. Sann looked up again before stroking his healthy cheek. “Wont ask how. Instead, Want some ice?” Sann smiled after signing. Just before noticing a tear rolled down Albus’s cheek. Then he frantically started to round his chest as an apology.

The albino shook his head not able to shake the smile off his face for the rest of the night. It was even more difficult as Sann finally sat on the border of the chair. Next to him. To eat french toasts for the first time and had Cloude laughing at their reaction. Even more as, deep into the night, he stroke Sann’s hair while sitting next to him reading the space part of the encyclopedia. Sometimes asking what a word meant and pouting when he didnt know. Taking out the dictionary and reading the meaning together.

The futon on his back didn’t feel so hard suddenly. Even if he managed to keep himself awake way after Sann left to sleep, he covered his eyes. After a moment, he passed his fingers around the leather collar on his neck. Loosened up to sleep like always. Still there. The physical permission to keep having all that. A cozy place to sleep, a job, friends as well as the insults and degradation.

What deemed him her property.

He had her words stuck in his mind all day. His Ma´am had made something clear that day but it didn´t make him feel better at all. It was just…so exhaustingly confusing. He didn´t understand how to be good for her, how to keep the punishments away. By some lucky strike he had managed to get this far without fucking up, but this was an strike and he knew better by now to think she would wait for a third to act.

Albus let out his breath as he covered his eyes with his hand. Feeling the warmth of his swollen fingers, he opened his eyest to stare at the knuckles with bandaids Sann insisted in putting after some ice and smiled before rolling over to face the door, covering his head with his arm like an instinct the handlers didn’t put in him, and closed his eyes to sleep.

For a moment, Albus swore to himself he would figure out his owner as he went by, even more carefully now. It would be ok. As long as he had that one person by his side, it would be enough.

[tickletastic]

Movie Nights

Fandom: Man Of Medan

Ship: Alex/Julia, Conrad/Brad

Summary: Julia deals with the fact that Conrad hasn’t slept for days, and to Conrad’s dismay, this ends up happening right before a movie day with Conrad and Brad. Julia can be very persuasive, and Brad can be too.

Notes: I might just use sleeplessness as my inciting incident a little too much, ngl. Projection is important sometimes.

Julia insisted on Conrad bonding more with Alex and Brad, after all, Alex and Conrad were the two most important people in her life. It definitely helped that she thought Brad might have a little thing for Conrad.

Conrad had known they were coming, and yet he had still spent the night awake. He had always had an issue with insomnia, usually he would drink until he could barely open his eyes, but Julia and Roxie, their housekeeper, had started to give him a hard time about his alcohol intake. Their parents were barely home, so at least he didn’t have to worry about them. Not that they’d really notice.

Julia had popped her head into his room every hour on the hour until she found herself drifting off, but Conrad wasn’t sleeping, he wasn’t even trying to, really. It was a bad night. 

At 11, he tried to sleep, he layed in bed for an hour, tossing and turning, but it just wasn’t working. He got up at 12:30 and turned on his Playstation, playing some 2K. When he got bored of that, he walked the halls of the mansion, leading himself to the star room. The star room was a room that their parents had built when they were kids, and it was basically a normal room, with rocking chairs and a minifridge, but the entire roof was a skylight, matched with floor-to-ceiling windows. From so far outside of the city, the stars were always beautiful at night.

Conrad took some blankets that were stacked and folded on the rocking chair and organized them on the floor before flopping into them. He looked up at the sky, just watching the stars go by, and eventually watching the sunrise.

The next morning, Julia searched the house, wondering where Conrad could be. When they were kids, Conrad would fall asleep in the weirdest places in the house, and Julia finds herself playing the role of their old nannies as she looks for him. When she finally bursts into the star room, Conrad sits up, alarmed with how quickly she ran into the room. 

“Have you slept, Connie?” Julia asked, concern in her voice.

“Yup, slept for a few hours last night.”

“Bullshit, I know you didn’t sleep at all. Joseph put your breakfast tray in your room, go eat and shower, meet me in the cinema room. You’re going to sleep today, whether I have to force you to or not.”

Conrad left, rolling his eyes, hard, and making some sarcastic comments as he left the room. That’s how he ended up in the cinema room an hour later, getting attacked by his sister because of his sleeplessness. 

“Fuhuhuck off! Yohohou’re not playing fahahair!”

“Was I ever one to play fair?”

“Yehehehes! You were ahahalaways the fahahair ohohone! I’m thehe-” Conrad interrupted himself with a snort, “I’m the chahaharming ohohone!”

“Hey! You’ll pay for that!” Julia shouted, it always dumbfounded her that Conrad could never flip the situation. When they were kids, he never stood a chance against her. Having been shorter than her until two years ago, she believed it had grown into a learned helplessness. Despite the fact that he could, very easily, pick her up off of him, he just curled into a ball and tried to protect himself. “I don’t know about being the charming one, you seem like the ticklish one to me.”

“Julia- Julia no!” 

The sound of a raspberry sounded through the hallway leading up the cinema room as Brad, Alex, and Roxie approached. Alex’s face was completely neutral, but Brad was trying to suppress his laughter, he couldn’t help but find the manic and desperate aspect of Conrad’s laughter hilarious. and kind of cute

When they entered, Roxie cleared her throat. She was their housekeeper, but she had also been their nanny when they were in their younger teens. Even though her job was evolving, she found that Conrad and Julia still needed nannying sometimes.

Julia looked up, and Conrad followed suit before bolting out from underneath his sister, running across the room, putting as much space as possible between him and his sister. He put several rows of couches between the two of them before greeting Alex and Brad, trying to regain his calm, cool, and collected demeanour. 

“Hey Alex, Bradsicle. Please excuse Julia, she’s a sadist, but I’m sure you already knew that, Alex,” Conrad winked in his future brother-in-law’s direction.

Alex rolled his eyes, walking up to Julia and giving her a kiss. Brad gave Julia an awkward hug and waved towards Conrad. Roxie greeted Julia and Conrad, telling them that she’d go fetch snacks for them before leaving.

Conrad looked on edge, still standing like he was ready to run, and his sister finally confirmed his suspicions when Julia turned towards him, an absolutely evil look in her eyes. Julia looked up at Alex, “do you mind if I take care of Conrad before we start the movie? He was being a little shit again.” 

“Of course, babe, do what you gotta do,” It was Alex’s turn to wink at Conrad, and the blond knew that he was doomed, he didn’t know about Brad, but he did know that if Julia asked, Alex would help her catch Conrad.

Conrad stood with his hands out, like a player in a sport on the defence, and the panicked look returned to his face. He was already a little disheveled, his hair sitting messily on his head, and the look of genuine fear in his eyes didn’t make things much better. Brad noted that he wasn’t in his usual attire, but then again, he had only seen Conrad twice or so since their little diving trip. He thought about him a lot more than twice though. Conrad was wearing a very over-sized hoodie and basketball shorts, making him look much smaller than he really was, and the most like a 19-year-old that Brad had ever seen him look. 

“Julia, just cut it out. Playtime is over,” Conrad reasoned, bouncing from foot to foot and getting prepared to run. Julia pretended like she was going to charge around the couches towards him, and he flinched, scared out of his mind. “Julia, come on, Alex and Brad are waiting for us to start the movie, don’t you want to be a good host?”

This time Julia really started running, Conrad running from her in response, “No, no, no, no, no, Julia stop, this is dumb!”

“Quit your whining, Connie. I wouldn’t have to do this if you weren’t so fucking stubborn,” 

“I don’t whine, I just have better things to do than run from you. I mean, look, Brad’s just dying for my attention,” Conrad joked, oblivious to the truth in his words. Brad blushed, but Conrad was too busy running to notice.

He laughed nervously, rounding the couches and getting to where Julia previously was, in between the first couch and the giant screen. They ran like that for a couple seconds, in a circle around the couches, Conrad begging Julia to stop chasing him. 

Conrad ran around the couch that Alex had taken a seat in, one of the two at the front, and he felt himself falling to the ground. He looked back when he landed, and saw a smirk on Alex’s face. “I thought we were bros, Alex!”

“Sorry, dude, but Julia’s my fiance. Pretty sure that fiance comes before fiance’s brother.”

“Julia, Jules, c’mon sis, you don’t have to do this, it’s not that big of a deal. Didn’t Ghandi do a sleep strike?”

“First of all, no, he did a hunger strike, and you are certainly not Ghandi. Second of all ‘it’s not that big of a deal’,” Julia put her hands up and did a silly voice in an attempt to mock Conrad, “It’s a pretty big deal, you didn’t sleep at all, did you even sleep the night before?”

Conrad looked away, his brow furrowing as he tried not to show any guilt. 

“Seriously? Tonight I’m slipping something into your beer,” Julia was kind of pissed off, and that scared him a little more. “Just say that you’ll sleep and I won’t do anything, Connie, it’s that easy.”

“You know that’s not that easy,” Conrad responded, but before he could try to reason, Julia was back at tickling his ribs like she was before Alex and Brad had shown up. Conrad threw his head back, trying to grab his sister’s wrists. He ended up curling up into a ball and holding her wrists, unable to push them away from her skin. He couldn’t help but giggle out, weakly shaking his head. 

“Juhuhules stahahap!”

“But I just started!”

“It’s unbehehearable!” Conrad giggled, twitching every time her fingers poked him somewhere else. 

“Alex, would you mind holding his arms? They’re getting in my way,” Julia asked. Alex walked over without any questions, leaning down to his knees in front of Conrad.

“Dohohon’t! Alehehex, buddy, don’t do this!” Alex wasn’t taking any of Conrad’s begging either, and he quickly gathered the blond’s wrists in his hands, holding them above his head.

Julia wiggled between the bones of Conrad’s ribs, and even slipped her fingers under his hoodie to poke his tummy, and Conrad was struggling to escape. She wiggled her fingers upwards, under his arms, and Conrad screamed in protest, begging for Julia to show some mercy. 

Julia’s hands were fast and unpredictable, Conrad felt like they were everywhere at once because of how frequently she switched spots. When Julia asked Alex if he would be able to flip Conrad over, Conrad knew that he was in for it. 

“Juhuhules don’t! Plehehease! I’ll do whahahatever you’d like! Juhust don’t!” Conrad was desperate, he really just wanted it to stop, but he felt Alex turning him onto his tummy, and he knew that his pleas fell on deaf ears. 

He felt electrocuted when her fingers touched down on his shoulder blades, and he had to struggle against Alex’s hold. Julia used the fingers on her other hand and traced the nape of his neck, and his laughter rose in volume. He begged and begged to be let go through his hysterical laughter, which had grown to be interrupted by hiccups and snorts. 

Roxie entered the room, a cart full of snacks, both fresh and packaged, along with a variety of drinks. “Julia, I do think that your brother is going to need some air, cut him a little break?”

Julia laughed, but agreed, standing up. Conrad was still laughing frantically, covering his face with the sleeves of his sweater, and rolling into a ball. Brad really did like that way that the sight made him feel, Conrad was just too cute when he was out of his element, and it was starting to get to Brad. Brad walked over, offering a hand and a little side smile, “Did you know that you can’t catch up on lost sleep by sleeping more? Your body needs an adequate amount of sleep every night in order to restore proper balance.”

Conrad smile warmly, not his usual smug smile, and took Brad’s hand.

They turned the movie on, they had decided on Knives Out earlier, so it had already been ready. Julia cuddled into Alex, tossing a blanket over them. 

Brad had settled on the couch behind them, and when Conrad collected himself, he sat on the couch on the other side from Brad, instead of getting his own couch. He tossed a thick comforter over his legs, making sure it covered Brad without making it look too obvious. 

Throughout the movie, Conrad managed to move closer and closer to Brad. Brad was oblivious to it until he looked over and saw that the two of them were practically touching. 

Brad decided to test the waters, and he placed his fingernails on Conrad’s knee, spidering outwords from where he had originally placed them. Conrad giggled softly, placing his hand on Brad’s, flattening them both on his thigh. Brad pinched Conrad’s leg a few more times before relaxing his hand in its previous position.

Somehow, 30 minutes later, Brad was carding his hands through Conrad’s hair as Conrad slept in his lap. Brad couldn’t find it in himself to wake Conrad up, not when Knives Out Ended, not when Enchanted ended, and not when Good Will Hunting began. 

When Conrad finally did wake up, groggy and a little disoriented, he found himself apologizing feverishly to Brad for falling asleep in his lap. Brad didn’t mind, and he made that known. 

“I’m sorry bro, I could get another couch if you want more space,” Conrad reassured, getting up as if to move. 

Brad didn’t know what came over him, but he ended up leaning forward, his hands gently holding the sides of Conrad’s face. His lips met Conrad’s, and Conrad leaned into it, kissing back. They didn’t pull away until they were both breathless, looking at each other in shock. Conrad, surprisingly, was the first to drop eye contact, a furious blush lining his cheeks and the faint freckles he had developed in the summer. 

“I’m sor-” Brad started, still looking at Conrad. He looked really beautiful like this, flustered and wordless. 

“Don’t apologize,” Conrad interrupted, “I liked it.”

[amarabliss]

Galahdian Dreams - 7 (Nyx Ulric/Reader)

Synopsis: Your father was the king of Insomnia. He was good and just. You never thought you’d meet anyone like him after he was taken from the world. Your Uncle Regis, has taken the throne and followed through on your father’s plans. It was good to see the city in capable hands.

Enter Nyx Ulric, refugee, Glaive, fighter…how is it he can see all your secrets? He knows how to set you off and he’s promised to not let you go…(AU for sure, Regis wasn’t supposed to take the throne, and our lovely Nyx has more of a past then we thought…)

Part One Part Two Part Three Part Four Part Five Part Six

**WARNING** please be aware there are depictions of violence that may be triggering. Please remember to spread tolerance in the world and not hate. 

Be the first step to a better future.

Nyx groaned as he rolled over his bed reaching for his phone that had just went off. Everything was hazy from the night before, but as he read the text from you it slowly started come back into focus.

Y/N – Captain Drautos got me back…please rest well… (1am)

Y/N – Don’t think because you have the day off gets you off the hook. (9am)

Y/N – Please take care of youself…(Now)

You misspelled a word he smiled a little. That wasn’t like you at all, you must’ve been very worried for him. He set his phone down as he threw his feet off his bed, the cold floor brought him back to the night before.

The both of you had only stayed for an hour more. Everyone begged you to come back. Even Crowe pulled you to the side and spoke to you for a while, which worried him…

“So…” He walked backwards as they headed back to the Citadel, “what’cha think?”

You smiled at him shoving your hands into his jacket to keep warm, “You have very nice friends.”

“And…” He smirked leaning forward looking at your face when you looked away.

“It was nice to not have the weight of expectations on my shoulders.” You looked back at him eyes bright with happiness, “It was nice to just talk about what I like to do without someone telling me to focus on something else. I hope I can go back.”

“You’re always welcome.” He stopped in front of you smiling, “Just let me know when you want to go…”

“Are all the wards like that one? With a market at the front?” You asked as he started walking next to you again.

“Other wards? This is the only one…” You stopped looking at him face dropping, “What is it?”

“That can’t be right…you can’t all live in that small area?” You shook your head when he confirmed that they did. It hadn’t even been ten minutes and already you were falling back into your royal role, “That wasn’t part of the plan…”

“Plan?” He titled his head looking at you confused.

“After the initial attack on Galahd my father drew up a plan for aid and refugees…” You put you hand to your face as worry and anger flashed in your eyes, “I helped him with it…there were specific things in place to allow for more people…to keep everyone safe.”

“Okay…well…” He stepped closer to you as he put his hand on your arm to try and comfort you, “we can worry about everything tomorrow…”

As you began to nod someone began to approach them shouting, “Hey! Get your hands off her!”

Nyx turned to look and was met with a haymaker. A bright light flashed behind his eyes as fell to the ground landing hard on his arm. He heard you cry out alarmed as he tried to get up receiving a swift kick into the stomach forcing what air he had out, “Stop! Stop it!”

Nyx groaned and grunted as a group of men gathered around him beating him. You kept screaming at them to stop as he managed to cover his head, “Stop!”

“Keep her quiet! She’s no better than them if she’s hanging around with them…” Nyx felt his fist ball up hearing that. You let out a muffled scream…it sounded like you were struggling.

By order of the king, Glaives were not to use their abilities on citizens of Insomnia. In this case, he needed to protect his charge…a grey area leaning favorably in his direction…he hoped.

He reached out drawing the electricity from the lamps around him as a source. He waited until he gathered enough before he grabbed one of his assailant’s legs sending them flying away with the electric force.

The surprise attack paused the abuse he was receiving enough for him to roll out of the way to his knees. He stood up looking at the other two who had been attacking him and the third holding you back. When he finally spoke, his voice was deep like a low growl, “Let her go.”

“Shit…shit he’s a Glaive…” The one was wise enough to see that at least. The mention of that gave the other two hesitant looks.

“Get your friend…” Nyx continued his low tone as he balled up his fist letting electricity crackle around it again, “and get out of here…”

The two moved around him slowly to collect their buddy. The other one held onto you for a moment longer before he shoved you toward him taking off. Nyx caught you watching them run down the street. Once he was sure they were away his body shook before his knees gave out.

“Nyx!” You tried so hard to hold him up, but he was too heavy. You crumpled under him, half guiding him down, cradling his head so he didn’t hit the ground, “Nyx…no no no…open your eyes…Nyx!”

He cracked them slightly grimacing a little, “Ar-are you okay?”

“Me…no…don’t worry about me…” You shook your head putting your hand against the side of his face. He must’ve looked bad because your face was red with tears, “Oh Six…What do I do?”

He groaned reaching into his pants with difficulty pulling out his phone unlocking it, “Call…Titus…”

“Titus…who…” Was the last thing he heard from you before he passed out.

He washed his hands in the sink after using the bathroom and looked at himself in the mirror. His nose was swollen and broken, lip cut, large gash on the side of his head ending somewhere in his hair…and bruises…he couldn’t blame you for being terrified. Head wounds bleed like a bitch.

He stood up straight clenching his jaw as the bandage around his ribs began giving him resistance. Astrals this was gonna be a rough couple of days…

He limped back to bed laying down, gently letting his head plop down into his pillow. He shut his eyes just about finding rest when his phone buzzed. He let out a frustrated sigh reaching for it. He shook his head as he answered, “Titus…”

“Ah…he lives.” Titus didn’t sound completely furious yet, “How are you feeling?”

“Like I was jumped and had the shit kicked out of me…” Nyx smirked a little shutting his eyes, “Oh wait…”

“Yeah you’re laughing now…it could’ve been a lot worse.” He could hear him rustling through papers, “Seriously, how are you doing?”

“Sore…super headache…” Nyx listed off as he rolled to his side groaning, “hurts to breath…”

“All normal things to feel. Crowe is afraid you might have a concussion; I think you’re fine. Regardless, everyone is going to be calling you today.” Titus told him and before he could protest, “And if you don’t answer Libertus is going to come over and sit with you.”

Nyx let out a frustrated growl opening his eyes, “Fine…”

“You know why…” Titus started as Nyx interrupted.

“Yeah…yeah…I know.” He rolled back to his back staring at the ceiling, “…is Y/N alright?”

“Physically…yes…not a scratch on her.” Titus told him as more shuffling occurred.

“And mentally?” Nyx felt his chest tighten thinking back to when he first met you.

“Scared…upset…” Titus sighed clearly stopping whatever work he was working, “I got her back here with no one noticing…though I’m not as stealthy as you.”

“I’m sure you did great.” Nyx frowned letting silence fill the line for a moment, “Who’s with her?”

“Pelna…I figured his sunny attitude might help put her at ease.” He told him with a sigh, “If that isn’t…”

“It’s fine.” Nyx shook his head, “I’m not worried about anything…I’ll be back tomorrow.”

“No, that’s not what…” Titus began again as Nyx interrupted once more, “Dammit Nyx! For once in your life just listen to me!”

Nyx fell silent waiting for him to go on, “You have to take care of yourself. You are more important then you think. Last night…last night could have been the end of us…so please…I will take care of everything here. You just heal.”

Nyx shut his eyes nodding before he spoke quietly, “Alright…I understand.”

“…thank you.” Titus sighed, “I know that it’s hard for you to just sit by.”

“Yeah…” Nyx frowned a little as he opened his eyes again, “I think Y/N’s figured me out…”

“What do you mean?” The sound of a stapler rang out on the other side.

“I think she knows who I am…” There was a definite pause on the other side, “I didn’t tell her…”

“Are you going to?” Titus waited for an answer but received none, “Nyx?”

“I think I have too…” Nyx sighed frowning putting his free hand to his face, “So much for anonymity…”

“Will you leave your position?” Titus asked sounding eager.

“Not if I don’t have to.” Hearing a heavy sigh made him smile, “You didn’t think it’d be that easy, did you?”

“You realize that opens a very big can of worms…” Titus told him as another stapler sounded.

“Doesn’t have to…what are you doing?” He winced as he pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Dossiers… it’s a new policy the higher ups want. We need to have information on everyone who’s a Glaive.” Titus told him begrudgingly.

“Is something happening?” Nyx sat up letting out a curse putting a hand to his chest.

“You alright?” Nyx couldn’t help but smile hearing the Captain’s concern.

“Yep…just me being me. Can’t sit still.” He told him picking fuzz of his sheets.

“Just don’t be stupid…please…my heart can’t take the stress.” Nyx laughed before he groaned. Titus chuckled sounding pleased in his pain, “As for if something going on…do you really think they’d tell me?”

Nyx sighed draping his arm over his knee, “I can do some digging…”

“Nyx…” It was the same exhausted tone he used to give him back home.

“I can do it right from here…won’t even leave the house.” Nyx told him with a smile, “I just happen to know a Crownsguard who has a parent that protects the king…”

“I wouldn’t be able to stop you even if I was there babysitting you myself…” Titus sighed. Nyx could practically see him rubbing his face in frustration, “Just please…”

“I will. I won’t leave…I’ll just sit in my chair or lay in bed.” Nyx reassured him, “I’ll even answer the phone when everyone calls.”

“Appreciate that…take it easy.” Titus told him hanging up.

Nyx sighed looking around his apartment. He needed to clean this place…luckily he had the perfect excuse not to do that today. He chuckled to himself falling back gently. He looked at his phone in his hand pulling up your messages.

He stared at them for a long time before he worked up the courage to text you back.

Nyx – Glad you got back in one piece…really sorry I wasn’t on my game.

… … …

His eyes widened when he saw the little dots almost immediately alerting him that you were responding.

Y/N – It wasn’t your fault. I’m sorry that my people are so full of hate.

Y/N – How are you feeling?

He smiled involuntarily at the question before his fingers went to work.

Nyx – I have had better days, but I’ve definitely had worse…

… … …

Why did his heart skip simply by seeing dots? Yeah…sure he thought you were attractive, but he didn’t know what you liked to do besides gardening. You were book smart, eloquent with your words, and you used to be linked with your people...something since falling away from the light you lost.

But was a month of hanging around one another enough time to really know anyone? Was taking you out to meet his friends more then just trying to get you to trust him?

Y/N – Captain Drautos was sure your ribs were broken…if you need anything, please ask.

Nyx – Nothing I can’t handle. I’ll be back in a couple of days.

Y/N – Take more time if you need it. Pelna is doing a great job in your absence.

Nyx – I bet he’s not as quiet as I am though. Studying in the library must be hard…

Y/N – You’re not wrong, he likes to chat, but it’s okay. I don’t feel like studying today.

He chuckled and continued carrying on a conversation with you for a while before his eyes began to get heavy, lowering with each blink until they finally shut.

When his eyes opened again, he was laying under a large palm tree in hammock. The breeze smelled sweet as it blew across him. He smiled feeling content under the Galahdian sky.

“Nyx!” He looked over seeing Lena running toward him big smile on his face already dressed for their special guests, “They’re here!”

He groaned waving his hand at her before rolling over, “Psh…”

“You don’t want to meet your future?” She leaned on the hammock looking at him, “I heard she’s really pretty…”

“She’s probably pale and pasty…” Nyx covered his head with his arm as she leaned closer to him.

Lena scowled poking him in the ribs making him jump, “Mom worked really hard on this…and you agreed to it! So, don’t disappoint her!”

He peeked his eye open looking through past his arm at her letting out a big sigh, “I can’t get out of this one, can I?”

“’Fraid not, kinda a requirement to meet your betrothed before the wedding.” Lena crossed her arms cocking her hip to one side. She was going to make someone very happy in the future, and also be very frustrating to handle.

He rolled his eyes hopping out of the hammock smirking at her, “When did you get so smart?”

“It’s a natural talent I have. It must’ve skipped you!” She let out a laugh as he started attacking her sides with tickles, “Nyx stop! Stop it!”

He laughed a little letting her run off as he reached for his achkan jacket. He knew his responsibility he just wanted to avoid it as long as he could. He never felt like he’d be able to do his father justice. Though his mother told him to rule with his own heart, and not his father’s…it was hard not to want to live up to a man who instilled strength in his nation.

He closed each button walking slowly toward the entrance of their home. He’d heard about the Lucian capitol and he wondered if it’s princess would be underwhelmed by them just living in a large estate instead of castle reaching for the sky. He also wondered if you’d even wanted to do this or if King Malcolm was forcing you into it for the resources…

“Nyx…late as always.” He smiled leaning down kissing his mother’s cheeks before she looked him over, “At least you’re dressed for the occasion...”

“I know how important this is to you mom.” He took his place next to her as Lena took her spot on the other side, “I know how important this is for our country.”

Selena looked at him letting out a sigh, “Good…I know this arrangement may not be ideal…but I do hope one day you both find a way to love one another.”

He looked at her and smiled, “I’m sure it will all work out.”

She smiled at him giving his arm a supportive squeeze before she stepped out. Lena looked at him and he gave her a wink before following them both out to meet their arriving guests. He stood on the steps behind his mother and sister as sleek black car pulled up.

Two men stepped out looking around the area before they both went to the back doors opening them. The first to step out was King Malcolm. He smiled greeting his mother with a low bow. He turned waving his arm out to an older woman introducing her as his wife.

His eyes shifted to the third person stepping out on the other side of the car. No doubt the woman he was supposed to spend the rest of his life with. Sunlight bounced off your hair as you looked out over the forest.

When you turned, he felt a million butterflies flutter in his stomach. You had kind eyes and a beautiful smile. You moved with grace around the car as you told the young man with dark hair following you around to back off, “Gladio it’s fine. We wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t…”

“Well just lemme know…” He crossed his arms looking up towards Nyx with a glare as he whispered toward you, “Can’t be too careful!”

You shushed him making Nyx chuckle. It reminded him of himself and how he interacted with his own guards. Luckily when he was at home he wasn’t required to tote them around. One thing was for sure you were at least playful.

“And this is my daughter, Y/N.” Your father introduced you to his mother.

You smiled at her bowing low like your father, “It’s so wonderful to finally meet you. My father has said nothing but wonderful things about Galahd and its people.”

“Oh my…she is bright, isn’t she?” Selena smiled glancing toward Nyx, “Perhaps this is a blessing and you can teach my son some etiquette of the court?”

Nyx rolled his eyes a little stepping down as his mother introduced him and his sister, “This is my younger daughter, Selena.”

“You can call me Lena, little less confusing.” She curtsied excitedly with curious eyes.

“And this my son and heir to my position, Nyx.” Selena waved toward him.

He stepped next to his mother bowing to your parents, then bowing to you offering his hand out, “It’s a pleasure to finally meet you. Your father did not do you justice.”

When you took his hand, he kissed the top of it making you blush, “The pleasure is mine.”

“Wonderful.” Selena smiled at them all throwing her hands out gently, “We’ll let you all get settled before we have lunch. I’m sure the boat ride over was long.”

“We had fair weather and calm seas…” Malcolm began to speak as he and your mother walked with the queen.

Nyx let go of your hand looking at Lena nodding his head for her to skedaddle. She smirked at him before stepping up to you, “I just wanted to say welcome to Galahd. If you have any questions, it’s probably better to ask me or mom…”

“Lena…” He coughed a little as she laughed walking away, “She didn’t mean that.”

“Oh, it seems she did or else she wouldn’t have said it.” You smirked at him eyes twinkling.

He laughed a little as you both began going up the stairs, “She’s an instigator is more like it.”

“Troublemaker you mean…” You stopped turning around seeing your guard slowly creeping up behind you, “You do have better things to do. I’m in good hands from what my father tells me. The prince is well versed in fighting.”

Nyx felt warmth spread throughout his shoulders when you looked at him smiling as your guard moved past you both, “You trust your father’s opinion of me?”

“He’s a good judge of character. We wouldn’t be here otherwise, and I’m certain he wouldn’t have asked me to marry you if you were not a good man.” You looked back making a face, “What is that whistling noise?”

“Whistling?” He looked up as fear rose in his chest. He saw bombs drifting downward from Niflheim ships.

He reached for you as walked inside…

“No!” He shot up letting out cry of pain rolling to the side putting a hand on his side. He took in several sharp breaths trying to get the pain under control.

“Hey hey hey…take it easy.” He looked up as Crowe came into view helping him to sit up, “That must’ve been some dream.”

“Just…” He took in a few more deep breaths, “…never mind…what are you doing here?”

“I figured you were hungry…and I also thought I’d check you over again.” She told him reaching for his phone waving it in his face, “And you slept through three check-ins.”

“Ah…so Titus sent you.”  He groaned again as he leaned back on his elbows “I appreciate the concern, but really I’m fine.”

“Clearly…” She rolled her eyes tossing his phone next to home before she began to undo the bandages, “You really got wrecked last night. Had us all worried…If Y/N hadn’t called Titus…”

“I’d still be okay because she would have figured it out.” Nyx interrupted her.

“I suppose…but Nyx if you’re going to be bringing her around…you should really consider teaching her a thing or two.” Crowe told him with a sigh as she started feeling his side.

“She knows how to fight…it’s just…” He shook his head wincing away from her touch, “They stopped her training pretty much as soon as she started…no power, no fighting I guess.”

“Well you should give her a refresher if her own people are gonna be bigots.” She shook her head started to wrap him up again.

He didn’t respond as he chewed his bottom lip. Crowe wasn’t wrong, it would benefit you to know some self-defense. He couldn’t be there every time, though he wouldn’t admit that.

He glanced at his phone as it went off. His eyes widened as the preview held the whole message.

Pelna – call y/n…

[asrasotherbottom]

Frustrated HC request: Main Six with an MC with chronic insomnia. (Why yes, I was up at an ungodly hour last night, why do you ask?)

bb -----------------------------------Asra

Asra would at least try stay up with you

He can sleep most of the next day anyway without a problem so

He would make an effort to set up the shop for the day the night before so he could open while you got a few extra hours of sleep if you needed it. 

He would offer to try and use magic to help you sleep, but he understood if you didn’t want that. 

Even if Asra does fall asleep he stays cuddling you as long as he can, big spoon though, and you can feel his warm breath on the back of your neck

Gentle kisses if he wakes up during the night and sees you awake too. 

Faust would cuddle up with you in bed like a cat if you were awake and try to get pats out of you. 

Soothing herbal teas!

Julian

Same fucking hat buddy

He’s up, you’re up, might as well make coffee. 

No! He tells himself! You should go lay down, he’ll tuck you in. 

He tucks you in and lays with you until he eventually falls asleep 

In fact helping cuddle you until you fall asleep helps him break him of his bad habit of not going to sleep until late.

He’s up by sunrise dealing with whatever has to happen that day so no worries if you have to stay in bed because you got to sleep extremely late.

Teas to help promote sleep!

Mazelinka’s soup, she’s the queen of aiding sleep. 

Nadia

She will literally stroke your hair all night and stay up with you if she’s able to

Heavy duty curtains for maximum darkness so you can keep sleeping during the day. 

She’s the countess so to a degree she can control how things are scheduled and make sure you dont have anything before noon in case you can’t sleep the night before. 

Tries different fabrics of sheet or pillowcase or different fragrances in case any of them might help. 

She thinks you look so peaceful and happy when you sleep but knowing that you finally got to sleep makes her even happier when she rolls over and sees you there. 

Muriel

He always gets worried that his nightmares will wake you up after you’ve finally gotten to sleep 

Inanna lays on you, trying to help, but she’ll stay up with you even if Muriel falls asleep

He’s really quiet so he’ll get up early to do any morning tasks that can’t wait and make sure to not wake you up. 

Laying with your head over his chest and listening to his heartbeat is soothing and he likes having his arm around you at night, whether youre asleep or not. 

He tries to stay up with you as much as he can, and he checks on you often during the night. 

He’ll try to get Asra’s help if theres any teas or magic he knows of that can help you get to sleep. 

Portia

Portia has to be up before the sunrise but she’ll keep the sunrise out of the bedroom best she can

If you’re still up when she’s getting up she’ll give you a few quick kisses and gentle loving words

Pepi is more than happy to sit and purr on you unitl you sleep and keep napping with you as long as you need. 

You spend a lot of time awake with her in bed but she is so beautiful when she sleeps. 

You do have to make an adjustment for any snoring though. 

Portia keeps plenty of books around  since she learned how to read though and so theres always a stack of books to read if you cant sleep

Lucio

Lucio will stay up telling you stories of his travels or just about his day or juicy gossip he’s heard

He’ll play with your hair gently while you’re trying to get to sleep. 

When he falls asleep though hes out like a light and sleeps like a brick. 

He suggests a little wine to try and get you sleepy. (maybe a lot of wine between the two of you) 

M&M don’t really help matters, changing positions a lot during the night. 

He will make sure that you’re not disturbed once you do get to sleep though, and no matter when he falls asleep, he stays with you to make sure you get to wake up to his smiling face. 

[paopukairi]

Birthday Special: Noctis’s Birthday fanfic

A special birthday special for the sweet Prince of Lucis! This fic is set in an AU where there’s no war and no daemons! Also expect heavy NoctxLuna, RavusxOC and IgnisxOC. Anyway I worked hard on this so I hope you enjoy! 

Noctis’s Special Day

It was odd to say the least when the Prince wasn’t awoken by Ignis or Gladio or even his little sister for the matter. Noct opened his eyes and could see the bright sun shining through the dark green tent he slept in. He lifted his head whilst yawning and was surprised to not see anyone else in the tent; it was just him on his sleeping bag. He slowly crawled out of the tent and covered his vision from the bright sun. Again, no one was outside. This was all so weird. He grabbed his phone and texted his sister Bella and got no answer. He then texted Ignis with the same result. The Prince tried calling up the others but it kept ringing until it went to voicemail.

“Where in the Six are they?” He asked himself but then he noticed something beside his sleeping bag; it was a note from Ignis.

You must be hungry, I’ve prepared a hearty lunch for you at the Old House in Cape Caem, and it’s in the oven.

Ignis

“Lunch?” He turned his phone to check the time and pouted; 1pm. His advisor knew what time he would wake up by himself. “They’re probably there, trying to trick me or something.”

The Prince got changed into his usual attire of clothes and left camp, just like that. If Gladio was there, he would have definitely nagged him to pack everything away. ‘Gladio’s not here though.’ He smirked to himself. The haven he had awoken from was Spelcray Haven which was near Cape Caem anyway. He walked up the stairs and his eyes widened when he saw the Regalia wasn’t there. Instead there was only his sister’s best friend, Wren’s motorbike.

“They took the Regalia but left me this, huh?” He asked as he walked up to the motorbike to find a note on it from the owner obviously.

You better be careful with my baby, or else I’ll give you food poisoning!

He got onto the motorbike and switched the engine on. The Prince headed East to Cape Caem and in through a tunnel. He felt the refreshing cool breeze from the ocean hit his body as his hair danced in the breeze. Driving it would be no problem, he used to drive motorbikes around when he was in his teenage days and got a license for it when he was just 15. Ah, he remembered the days when he used to ride his sister around Insomnia. At times they would sneak out in the middle of the night to get desserts from the nearest bakeries and return without anyone catching them, well until Cor caught them and they were both grounded for a week.

His snapped out of daze when he had arrived at Cape Caem. Noct switched off the motorbike’s engine and hopped off then kept it against a random pole so it doesn’t fall over. He walked up the hill and finally got to the house.

“Alright guys very fu-” He froze mid-sentence when he opened the door and there were was no one there. He walked in and closed the door behind him. “This is really weird.” He placed his hands on his hips then shrugged when his stomach rumbled. The Prince walked into the kitchen and found his lunch in the oven. He found 2 thick slices of Garulessandwiches and smiled; one of his favourites! The young man began eating by himself and finished by drinking his water.

“Meow~” He turned to see that grey cat he fed in Galdin Quay and it had a note in his mouth.

“Hey there little guy. What you got there?” The feline jumped onto the table which Cor always hated. Noct took the note from the cat and in return gave him whatever leftover he had, including the lettuce which was in the sandwich. This note was from Gladio.

You gave your lettuce to the cat didn’t you? You never change. Anyway, go to the Vesperpool Fishing Spot to find your next note. And DON’T forget to freshen up.

“What kind of game is this?” He asked and sighed. “Fine, if that’s their game I’ll play along.” He left the plates and glass in the sink and went upstairs to freshen up. When he had dried his face he looked at the mirror. He was 21 and looked more like his father with each passing day. He no longer had that spikey hair and it fell to his chin. His baby face wasn’t apparent with his jawline more chiselled. Now that he looked more handsome than he was before, he was getting more attention from girls, which would leave him flustered. The Prince looked down with pink cheeks and a soft; the only girl who mattered to him was far away.

The young man ran downstairs and left the house. He ran towards the motorbike and carried on with their little game. On the way to the Vesperpool, he noticed the roads were emptier which made him wonder; where would everyone else be? But that didn’t stop him from speeding on the road with his friend’s motorbike.

It took him only 25 minutes to get to the Vesperpool and he walked north from the Parking Station. Being alone was nice, but he missed his friend’s and sister’s company. They had been together for the past year or so and he’s grown so used to them. When he got to the Fishing Spot, he found a note on the fishing shack which was again, weirdly empty. This note was from his best friend the Chocobo lover.

Must be feeling lonely huh? Get to Burbost Souvenir Emporium for your next and final hint buddy!

“I can’t remember where that is!” He exclaimed and picked up the note to find another message behind.

The caravan where we stopped to go to Greyshire Glacial Grotto btw

Okay now the Prince remembered where it was. He headed back to the Parking Spot and got back onto the motorbike then continued on. Noctis was so glad this was almost over, it’s been just over an hour without seeing them and it’s felt like a week. ‘Damn, I need them that much’ He smiled to himself.

Of course he did; he treasured them truly. Even though Gladio was hard on him at times, he was protective and loyal to the Prince as both Shield and friend. Ignis, well he depended so much on him but he truly was the greatest for always being there for him no matter what. Prompto always shined the way he was, he would make any activity, no matter how boring, entertaining and was truly his bestest friend. Wren, was someone he had known the shortest, she got along really well with everyone. She was the first person to not treat him any differently to how she would treat just anyone. He was so grateful to her for always staying by his sister’s side too and protecting her as her bodyguard. And finally his baby sister who was only younger than him by 2 years. Her smile was like the dawn and her personality was even brighter and more cheerful than that of Prompto’s. Bella loved him more than she loved anyone and was so protective of him even though she was the youngest. And Noctis, well he loved her more than anyone could love her. Not to mention he was protective over her whenever she was around her boyfriend Ravus, who he still didn’t really get along with.

Before he knew it, he was already at the Burbost Souvenir Emporium and found a key in the door of the caravan. He got off the bike and opened the caravan which was, as you guess it; empty!

“I’m about to say yeet any minute now.” He mumbled and found something on the bed. There was a note on top of folded clothing and he picked it up. A small smile graced his lips; it was from Bella.

Bet you’re getting pretty tired of this, Sleeping Beauty. Almost done! Wear these clothes and head to Galdin Quay to seek what your heart truly desires.

The dark haired Prince picked up the clothes; it was a black suit consisting of a black blazer, waistcoat, trousers, shoes, white shirt and a golden metallic tie. He put the clothes on and it fit snuggly around his body. Thankfully the tie was a clip on tie, because he couldn’t tie one to save his life. It was most likely that both Ignis and Bella had picked out this outfit. The reason being was that his advisor knew his size and his sister admired their family’s colour of black and gold.

As he rode the motorbike in the direction of Galdin Quay his mind began to wonder. ‘What my heart truly desires?’ The only thing he could think of was to see them as well as his father, Lunafreya, her mother, Cor, Clarus, Iris, Nyx, Libertus, Holly, Umbra and Pryna, Talcott, Monica, Dustin, Cid and Cindy. He wanted to see them all together but he knew it would difficult to get everyone in one place.

As he drove through the roads, he started to think of his mother too which made his heart squeeze with pain. It had been years since he died and he was only 2 when it happened. Queen Aulea passed in childbirth when she gave birth to Bella. He felt his blue eyes sting with tears, what he would give to see her again…

It had taken him just about an hour to get there and when he finally did Noct’s eyes widened and a soft gasp escaped his lips. The beach was decorated with balloons, signs with his name on it and Sylleblossoms everywhere. There was a table full of gifts on beach as well as people dressed in costumes of Moogles, Chocobos and even Kenny Crowe just to mess with Noct, for the kid’s entertainment. He stopped the motorbike and saw a group of people.

Everyone from nearby outposts and everyone he wanted to see, including Ravus, was there! Everyone pulled their confetti cannons as golden strings and confetti exploded everywhere.

“Happy Birthday, Noctis!” They all cheered and he got off the bike as a goofy smile lit up his face. His heart was beating so fast; what a surprise! Even he forgot it was his birthday today.

Bella who was standing in front of the crowd wearing a black top with spaghetti straps with a v-neckline, tucked into a high waisted golden glitter sequin short skirt, nude glitter tights and black and gold ankle strap pump shoes. Her long black hip length hair was styled in wavy locks and she wore mascara and some dark red lipstick to bring out her green eyes. She also wore golden hoop earring, a gold choker and her mother’s ring on her right ring finger and promise ring from Ravus on her left ring finger. Everyone else, but the Fleurets wore black and gold too with the Prompto, Ignis and Gladio wearing the same outfit as Noctis. Wren wore a simple black long sleeved top with a midi skirt with a golden floral design on it as well as black heels with her collarbone length hair pinned back. She also wore simple makeup, some mascara and rosy red lipstick to bring out her bright green eyes.

“Thank you…” Noctis smiled warmly with a tear falling down his cheeks. Bella and Regis walked towards them and they both hugged him tightly. He still wasn’t a fan of hugs, but today was an exception as he wrapped his arms around them both.

“Happy Birthday, son.” The King stated.

“Happy Birthday, Noct!” The Princess giggled.

“I love you both, with all my heart.” They both smiled at this knowing he really meant it.

“We love you too.” They said and pulled away.

“Hey squirt, did you like that little game?” Wren asked with a wink as she led the boys towards the Prince.

“It got really annoying. I thought you guys were trying to play a prank on me.” He pouted with crossed arms. “Whose idea was it to leave notes around?”

“Guilty.” Prompto grinned cheekily.

“And who planned this whole birthday party then?” Noct asked with a raised eyebrow. “I bet it was you, dad.”

“Your sister did.” Regis answered and he did a double take on his sister.

“R-really?” He stuttered and she nodded with a grin. “All of it?”

“Uh-huh. I planned it 2 weeks ago. Looks like I got a talent for party planning. Everyone else helped organise it. Ignis 12 hours making all the food, Wren and I baked your cake, Prompto and Gladio as well as the others decorated and Ravus got all the Sylleblossoms together.” Bella explained.

“Did he do it voluntarily?” He squinted his eyes and she rolled her eyes.

“Yes, duh.” The boys, Wren and Noct glared at her and she sweated nervously whilst lifting her hands in defeat. “Okay, I asked him to.”

“I bet you did a little bit more than ask.” Wren snickered as her boyfriend Ignis shook his head, Gladio smirked and Prompto giggled with Regis not understanding what she meant.

“Wren!” She elbowed her with a pout.

“Ramuh, strike me where I stand.” Noct murmured whilst glancing up at the sky. They heard soft barks and Umbra ran towards Noctis who knelt to the ground whilst rubbing his head. “Umbra, you came to my birthday party huh? Glad you can make it buddy.” He did that cute baby talk with Umbra who licked his face.

“Prince Noctis…” The man heard a voice and stood up to see Queen Sylva who smiled gently at him. The Queen of Tenebrae wore a white and silver long sleeved a line dress which reached the floor and a simple silver tiara on top of her head.

“Your Highness.” He bowed his head respectfully.  

“Oh how you’ve grown into a fine young man.” She stated whilst hugging him. His eyes widened with surprised when she did this and he froze not knowing if he should return it or just stand there. He could hear Gladio, Prompto, Regis, Bella and Wren snickering at his reaction. She pulled away from him and he cleared his throat.

“I’m glad you could make it.” Noctis said.

“We wouldn’t have missed it for the world.” She replied.

“My Prince.” He heard a familiar voice.

When his eyes fell on Lunafreya, he could feel his heart pounding in his chest and his cheeks turn hot. His once pale cheeks reddened as he blinked several times. He gulped and felt hot all of a sudden. It was as if he had seen a beautiful divine goddess. The Princess wore a white lace off the shoulder dress which fell to her knees. She also wore a silver crystal choker with matching earrings and her hair was left out. Luna stood there with her usual kind smile which made the Prince weak in his knees. By her side was Ravus who wore a white blazer, waistcoat and trousers, brown shoes, purple shirt and a silver metallic tie. His heterochromia eyes peered into Noctis who was just staring at his baby sister as he grew more impatient with his lack of words. The Prince of Lucis’s friends and sister noticed his dazed reaction and still couldn’t help but giggle.

“It’s as if Shiva froze him, Lunafreya.” Ravus stated and that was enough to snap Noct out of daze.

“Luna…you…you made it. I’m happy, uh, glad you’re here.” He stammered nervously and she nodded whilst blushing.

“Anyway, let’s get the presents inside. I bet Noct must be really hungry!” Bella stated and led the others inside whilst the youngsters carried the gifts.

When Noct and Luna had headed inside, they saw that the restaurant’s layout looked completely different. Instead of individual tables serving from 2 to 6, there were rectangular tables for everyone to sit together. Clarus, Cor, Sylva and Regis all sat together and were talking about how everything looked wonderful for the Prince’s Birthday. Whilst the rest were too busy teasing Noct for forgetting his own birthday. Bella, Gladio and Nyx had a fun time talking about Noct’s most embarrassing moments of his childhood, including the story when an 8 year old Noct confessed at a ball that he would marry Lady Lunafreya and that they would live happily ever after with 10 children whilst caring for Umbra and Pryna. They all laughed at this whilst Luna and Noct were both incredibly flustered and Ravus just glared at the Prince whilst wrapping his arm around his sister.

They were all served dinner before sunset with the King, Prince and Princess sitting at a table at the back. For dinner, there was a buffet consisting of all of the birthday boy’s favourite dishes which he was ecstatic about. Then it was time for Bella’s speech to Noctis on his birthday.

She stood up from her seat and cleared her throat. Everyone’s voices became silent into a mutter until there was complete silence.

“I’d like to take this moment to thank everyone for coming today. I am extremely grateful that you could make it for Noct’s birthday. Ignis, thank you so much for preparing such amazing food.” Both siblings smiled whilst lowering their heads respectfully at him. “Today is of course a really special and unforgettable day. Well almost for all.” She winked at her brother. “The day my lovely brother was born as my father would say the day he received a blessing from the Six. Although lazy most of the time and moody sometimes, my brother is truly a treasure to Eos. His kindness compares to only my father, his heart golden like our colour, words soft like a cloud and his strength great like Bahamut’s. I would like to raise a toast.” Bella raised her glass of champagne and so did everyone else. “To wish a happy birthday to a wonderful son, a kind Prince, a sweet lover, a dear friend and a perfect brother. May all your wishes come true and that your life is filled only with happiness and love. Happy Birthday, Sleeping Beauty.”

Everyone began clapping whilst Wren, Iris, Prompto and Cindy cheered. Noct smiled at this with a tear falling down his cheek as he wrapped his arms around his sister and pressed his lips against her forehead. She hugged him back which earned some aww’s from the crowd. The Prince of Lucis stood up too whilst holding her hand and looked at everyone.

“Thank you everyone for planning and organising this amazing party. Words can’t describe how happy I am but just know that I’m grateful for everyone has done today. Before coming here, Bella had left a note for me. To go to Galdin Quay to seek what my heart truly desires and this…this was what my heart truly desired. To see all the people special to me here and that’s what I got. And I thank the Six every day that I know there are people who really love me and care for me. It’s the best blessing I could ever have to be honest.” That special really moved both his sister and father who wiped their tears. They were so glad that he was happy today and that was all that mattered; Noct’s happiness.

When he was done with his speech, both Bella and Wren pushed a trolley table with a humungous 6 tier cake that was even taller than Bella who was 5ft 3in. The cake was decorated with figurines of all of Noct’s friends and family with the Prince on top holding a fishing rod. Noct’s eyes sparkled with amazement and everyone else was in awe as they praised the cake. Ignis helped both girls serve up the cake for each guest and they all enjoyed the delicious dessert the two best friends had prepared for them all.

The sun had begun to set in the horizon, many of the kids and guests were on the beach enjoying themselves whilst the elders had tea and coffee together. Bella grabbed both her brother and friend’s hands and led them to the dock where there was a boat for two that waited for them two/

“Quick before Ravus catches you both.” She said with a wink and Noct helped Luna get into the boat. And she pushed him after her. “Go get her tiger.” She mumbled loud enough for only him to hear. He blushed at this and glared at her.

“What if he sees us?” He asked curiously.

“Don’t worry, I got him under control now enjoy!” She pushed the back of the boat with her foot and nodded. Noct who quickly took the oars began rowing out, but not too far ahead and not too close to land.

Bella had sat down on the edge of the dock with her feet in the water. She heard footsteps as Ravus sat next to her with Ignis and Wren joining them.

“My love, where is…is that Noctis with my sister?” The Prince of Tenebrae asked with anger in his voice.

“Oh come now, let them be.” Ignis advised.

“Yeah you gotta be like Shiva and just chill.” Her best friend and boyfriend furrowed their eyebrows at her pun and she shrugged.

“But she’s my sister.” The silver haired man said.

“And he’s my brother. Don’t worry, my grey light flower. You can trust him.” Bella reassured him and when he heard his nickname he couldn’t help but blush and stay quiet. “Anyway Wren, did you bring the binoculars?”

“Yep!” The dark haired woman gave the Princess a pair of binoculars and Ignis sighed whilst pushing his glasses up.

“Shame on you both for being absolutely nosey.” He nagged.

“I’m just…keeping an eye in case he falls and drowns.” Wren snorted at Bella’s reasoning and the advisor just rolled his eyes with another deep sigh.

“I hope he does.” The older man mumbled earning him a nudge from his girlfriend.

“Ooooh, look he gave her his waistcoat, how cute!” The Princess’s bodyguard exclaimed.

“What?” Ravus hissed.

“Calm down, it is harmless. Only a token of kindness.” Ignis stated.

When the fireworks began to go off, Ignis couldn’t help but jump a little at it. Wren who noticed this, placed her hand on his and smiled gently at him with her eyes sparkling. She knew he was afraid of fireworks and promised him that she would be by his side through everything. He turned to him and there was that smile as warm as his heart and as beautiful as his existence to her. He leaned closer to her and pressed a sweet gentle kiss on her lips and she kissed him back. The kiss was heartfelt, light yet so tender, it made butterflies in their stomachs flutter. After just a minute they both pulled away and stared at the fireworks.

Ravus’s muscles relaxed and he sighed, maybe it was time he did trust the wayward Prince more around his sister. He knew Lunafreya had loved him dearly, surely if Noctis accepted him to date his sister then he could do the same. He turned to the girl who sat beside him and a smile graced his face; how luck was he to be in love with a girl like her, who heart was as bright as the sun. He wrapped his arm around her and she smiled, placing the binoculars down and resting her head against his arm. He placed his hand on her face, lifting it up to look into his mismatched eyes as he leaned in, capturing her red lips in a sweet, loving and powerful kiss. She kissed him back whilst holding his hand tight, never ever wanting to let go. He pulled away after a moment, his lips still on hers murmuring oh so quietly how much he loved her. When they had shared their beautiful and passionate moment, they both turned to the fireworks and admired it together.

In the distance, both Noctis and Lunafreya were staring up at the sky as it was lit with many colours. It was at this moment he knew that he could no longer hide his feelings for her anymore. He pulled away from her, holding her hands gently in his and she looked up at him.

“Luna, there’s something I have to tell you.” Her crystal blue eyes sparkled from the reflection of the fireworks and she nodded as her heart escalated with anxiety.

“What is it, Noctis?” She asked and he gulped. Beads of sweat trickled down the back of his neck and his face was hotter than Ifrit’s fire.

“For a long time, we have always been together. Since I was 6 and you were 10, I knew that you were like no one else. Whenever my dad would take us to Tenebrae, I would always get excited not for the love of your birthplace, but to see you.” She smiled at him. “As I grew up, my feelings for you changed and I knew that I didn’t want you just as my friend. But as someone more special.” He held her hands to his heart. “When I think of you, my heart goes crazy, when I see you, my brain is like fried eggs, when I hear your voice, and it’s most beautiful sound I could ever hear. Luna, it’s been you, it’s always been you. I love you, with all my heart and all my soul and I only want to make you the happiest woman in the world.”

“Oh Noctis…” She smiled with a tear falling down her cheek. “You just made me the happiest woman in the world. Because I love you too.” His eyes widened and he gulped.

“Y-you do?” Luna nodded. “Really?” She nodded again. “This isn’t a dream right?”

“No, this isn’t a dream.” She held his hands back showing him it wasn’t. “And even if it is, I never want to wake up from it.”

“Luna…” Suddenly he wrapped his arms around her, holding her close and so did she. “Luna, I love you so much.”

“I love you too, my Prince.” She whispered and they pulled away just a little.

He stared at those eyes, the ones he had always been in love and smiled whilst sighing with relief. She stared up at him with the widest smile on her face, as he wiped her tears and he leaned closer. And finally he had pressed his lips against hers, kissing her so carefully and lovingly. It took her a few seconds to process everything and treasure each millisecond until she kissed him back. She placed her soft warm hands onto his face as he wrapped his strong arms around neck. This moment, felt like an eternal blessing for them both. It was both their first kisses and they were both thankful that it was with each other.

After a minute or two they pulled away and were staring into each other eyes. “This has to be the best birthday I could ever have, all thanks for my family, to you and to my friends.” Lunafreya rested her head against his shoulder and they looked up at the stars forming in the sky as it lit with one final bright blue firework. “To everyone…thank you.”

[pepperoniwhirlwind]

~Honesty Hour~

     I was asked by @lovelynhiddenkittens to do all 150 questions in the Honesty Hour tag! 😮 Thank you, lovely and curious stranger~! 😆 But since that’s a lot for one post, I’ll break it up into chunks of 50 questions so it’s easier for all my blogging buddies to digest. 😊 Starting... now! 😝

1. Who was the last person you held hands with?      That would have to be Alex. He was warming my hand for me because it was ice cold. Though he doesn’t know that’s because I intentionally held my super cold drink for a really long time with that hand, then casually mentioned how cold my hand was so he’d try to warm it... >//> Introverts are sneaky flirts, what can I say? 😆😏

2. Are you outgoing or shy?      Shy, definitely. Though there are alters in the system much more outgoing than me.

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?      Tyler! 😄 I’ve been staying over at her apartment every weekend this past summer, and always enjoy our movie and gaming marathons. 😝

4. Are you easy to get along with?      I think so. I’m not very easily angered, a pacifist at heart, and a people-pleaser at my core. 😂 So it’s pretty hard not to get along with me.

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?

     I don’t know, Alex is a sweetheart so he’d probably help, and Tyler cares but she doesn’t do bodily fluids. 😆 So, it depends. And considering I’ve never been drunk, and seem to have too high a tolerance to get drunk without having to rob a bank to fund the sheer volume of alcohol needed, I doubt this problem will ever arise. 👌

6. What kind of people are you attracted to?

     Kind and funny people. 😊

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?

     I have no idea, but I won’t rule it out. Alex has kinda been cute and flirty towards me lately, so maaaybe~? >//>

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?

     Uh, well, the subject of the last question was Alex, so, him. 😆

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?

     A wee bit, yes. 😅 I put up a good facade though, but being asexual, sex is kinda... bleeehhh~ for me. e~e

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?

     That would have to be Tyler. :3 She’s my bestie from my ASL classes~ 💜 We have a looot in common, so we talk for hours at a time, in between movie and game marathons that is. 😆

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?

     Context: I was spamming Tyler gifs of adorable animals earlier today.

     The Text: “Aaand now I gotta get ready for therapy, so this shall be the crowning gif of adorable goodness!”

     Followed by a gif of two golden retrievers fighting over a tennis ball, with a third retriever (being shoved into the frame by a fourth, offscreen, retriever) resting his head on the two dogs feuding over the aforementioned tennis ball. 💖

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?

     This is rather hard... so I’ll just list the songs that I listen to on repeat a lot.

     1. “The Cure” by Lady Gaga

     2. “Insomnia” by IAMX

     3. “Middle of the Bed” by Lucy Rose

     4. “All the Rage” by Allie X

     5. “Wires” by The Neighbourhood

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?

     Yes. No. Kinda? It depends... If I’ve just had a shower and my hair is clean, I love it. ^w^ But if it’s been a bit and my hair isn’t all that clean I just feel embarrassed if people touch my hair. e~e

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?

     Ehhh... Depends which alter you ask really. Me, personally? Not so much. My family has always told me our family line is cursed to have bad luck, so if I believed in such things, I guess I’m doomed. 😂

15. What good thing happened this summer?

     I’ve started working on myself and my social life, strengthening friendships irl and online, or, at least attempting to. 😅 Sometimes I’m just bad at not isolating. But this past summer I’ve been spending basically every weekend at my friend Tyler’s apartment and hanging out with her core group of friends. It’s been a nice break from the chaos of the school semester. 😊

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

     Well, considering she’s on the other side of the country back in my home state, probably not. She was a lovely first kiss, but I’ll leave it at that. 🤭

17. Do you think there is life on other planets?

     With how many planets there are in the galaxy; the universe? Not to mention how many planets within The Goldilocks Zone that share a similar atmosphere to earth within the observable universe alone... How could I not think other life exists? At the very least, in some kind of bacterial form, though, I dare to dream a little bigger. ✨

18. Do you still talk to your first crush?

     Well, I’ve never really had a crush, per se, though plenty of squishes. :3 But my first squish did not turn out well, so, no. :c

19. Do you like bubble baths?

     Yes, especially if I go all out and light candles and play music on my phone. 🕯️🎶😌 However, I don’t do that very often. I take showers mostly.

20. Do you like your neighbors?

     Yeah, they’re chill people. The neighbors with the overly-territorial pitbull that kept us prisoner in our car for hours and broke into our fenced-in backyard to take massive doggie dumps out of sheer hatred for us moved away because their dog kept terrorizing the neighbourhood and was going to get put down if it didn’t stop breaking out to chase children on trikes and joggers onto rooftops. So, the neighbors we have now are awesome! 😆

21. What are your bad habits?

     Sometimes I’m too honest and don’t know when to stop talking, other times I’m so socially anxious I might as well be a feature of the wall at parties. 😂 I also have trichotillomania, a compulsive disorder related to OCD, in which I get really strong urges to pull out my hair sometimes, so definitely a bad habit... Just talking about it kinda... ehhhh... moving on. e~e

22. Where would you like to travel?

     A lot of places. Though Scotland is at the top of my list. Scotland is a huge part of my family’s heritage, and some of my family still lives there. So I would love to visit and spend some time in nature there~  💕

23. Do you have trust issues?

     Yes.

24. Favorite part of your daily routine?

     Well, anytime I get to de-stress is nice. I know wiping down my face with a face wipe always feels nice and refreshing after a day out running errands and attending classes. It’s the little things that are the most help~ 😊

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?

     All of it. If I could edit my body, that would be nice.

26. What do you do when you wake up?

     Hit snooze on the alarm a couple times, get up, walk to the bathroom... you can imagine the rest.

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?

     Nope, I’m quite happy with my vampire pale skin, and even my dirty blonde, curly lion’s mane of hair, and my blue eyes ain’t so bad either. I’m not completely hideous, just 97% hideous. 👌😂

28. Who are you most comfortable around?

     Myself. My alters. Tyler. Alex. My Tumblr fam~ 💞

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?

     No, because I usually cut them out of my life after they break my heart. Some have tried to stay friends with me or become friends with me again years later, but... no. I don’t need backstabbers in my life.

30. Do you ever want to get married?

     Maybe, someday. When the time is right, I’ll know, until then, I’ll enjoy my singledom~ :3

31. Is your hair long enough for a ponytail?

     Yes, it’s in a ponytail right now actually. 😆

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?

     NONE.

33. Spell your name with your chin.

     gtlo nhy (Oh gawd... What a name. 😂)

34. Do you play sports? What sports?

     Mi-Suk used to play on tennis and basketball teams, but our spine is a little too deteriorated nowadays to attempt such things.

35. Would you rather live without TV or music?

     Without TV, hands down. I’d die without music. I bleed music.

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?

     Yep. I had a bit of a squish on this kid named Travis in elementary school and never told him. My frenemy told him I had a crush on him, and he never talked to me after that. 😭

37. What do you say during awkward silences?

     I either make a joke or just enjoy the silence. Depends what mood I’m in. Sometimes I’m more introverted and just want to sit in silence or listen to music instead of talk. Other times I just wanna connect with people and I tend to crack a lot of darker, self-deprecating jokes as a way to break the ice, or tension if I feel some.

38. Describe your dream girl/guy?

     I want someone who is genuinely kind, patient, and funny. It also helps if they are neurodivergent like me, and have similar enough interests, sense of humor, etc. to my own. c: Overall, I just want to feel comfortable and safe with someone. 😊

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?

     I buy food at Fry’s... so... Fry’s?

40. What do you want to do after high school?

     I’m already out of high school, bub. Now I’m in college, and I still have no idea. I have dream jobs, dream homes, dream lives. But none of them seem realistic.

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?

     Depends on the crime, really. If I hired someone to babysit my hypothetical children, and they forgot to tell the children to clean up their toys, I believe a second chance is in order. If they, however, ditched the job to mack on Paul Puffy Lips next door, leaving my children to starve, I don’t believe I’ll be giving them another call.

42. If you’re being extremely quiet what does it mean?

     It means I’m probably really socially anxious at the moment and would prefer to not be made the center of attention. o~o’

43. Do you smile at strangers?

     Yes, sometimes to spread cheer and joy, other times because I’m worried they’ll think I’m an up-to-no-good deviant or zombified by depression, which is how I feel at least 80% of the time, and worry everyone notices, even strangers, who probably would not assume such things, but that’s social anxiety for you. 😂

44. A trip to outer space or the bottom of the ocean?

     Why not both? However, humans are so preoccupied with space that we’ve only explored 5% of our oceans. I don’t want the oceans to feel lonely, so I’ll visit them first. 💙

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?

     Sometimes the looming responsibilities in my life, other times I just don’t get out of bed. 

46. What are you paranoid about?

     A lot of things, but the most pressing concern of mine is that everyone will inevitably leave me because I’m a terrible, horrible human being who doesn’t deserve friendship. 😅

47. Have you ever been high?

     Every day, if I can help it. I have a medical marijuana card and have for a couple years now.

48. Have you ever been drunk?

     No.

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?

     No, not really. Nothing is coming to mind. 

50. What was the color of the last hoodie you wore?

     Well, I’m wearing a hoodie now, and it’s gray, with the Nirvana emblem on the front. 😝 It’s my favorite and coziest hoodie of all.

[unseenthewriter]

CHAPTER 2: SLEEP

Chapter 2: 2005 Words

Fic Total: 5349 Words

Series Total: 5349 Words

Sleep and I have always had a love/hate relationship. Humans need sleep. It feels nice gives the mind and body a rest but… I have insomnia and have been off my sleep meds once I ran out. I couldn't exactly get a new prescription without someone finding out about my situation. So I didn't get a new prescription. This has, of course, culminated with me being utterly exhausted and falling asleep when I don't want to. This time I fell asleep during another one of the diagnostic lectures. I'm so quiet normally that no one woke me up when it was over so I awoke in a dark lecture hall which is definitely a little freaky.

I grumbled nothing in particular as I packed up my things to quickly exit the dark lecture hall. I had already stopped by and hung out with Rosie for a bit before the lecture so now I was free which means…

I made my way back to Oncology and knocked on the door to Duncan's room before walking in. "Brought something special today." I said while waving the Xbox 360 game in one hand.

"Oh thank God this is like the 5th time I've read this book." Duncan replied while putting down the book.

I smiled. "This is one of my favorites so you better not break it." I said while putting the game in the Xbox 360 and handing Duncan the controller.

Duncan and I are only about a week apart in age. The cancer he's been fighting is very treatable just requires him to be in the hospital a lot. His parents travel constantly for work so Duncan is often here alone. "Any new homework?" He asked.

"Midterms next week so no." I said while sitting down in the chair near his bed. We also technically go to the same school.

"Elder Scrolls Oblivion huh? I haven't played this yet." He said.

"Yes now shush you don't want to miss Patrick Stewart voicing Emperor Uriel Septim." I replied as Duncan booted up the game.

"No! There's a chest back there you missed!" I exclaimed as Duncan was making his way through the tutorial.

"You're such a loot hoarder Jay. I don't need absolutely everything." Duncan replied back while fighting off a goblin.

"Dunc you know I play thief classes in games. It's my style." I huffed.

"My inventory was already full a few minutes ago. I had to drop a bunch of stuff." He protested.

"If you didn't always play classes with heavy armor." I replied.

"You play thieves. I play warriors." Duncan shot back.

I stuck my tongue out at him. I turned back around and noticed House and Wilson watching us. I blinked. "How long have you two been there?" I asked.

"Since the character creation." House replied.

I sighed. "Right Dunc I'll be back later. You've got to let me know your adventures though that's the rules."

Dunc looked up at me after pausing the game. "Thanks, man." He said and held out a fist.

I returned the fist bump before walking out of the room.

"Thieves huh?" House said.

"I like the sneaking around and stealing. Plus it's more loot." I said with a shrug.

The three of us stood there for a while before I sighed. "Someone going to bring up the elephant in the hallway or?" I asked while looking around.

"We have a spare room." Wilson finally replied.

We? 

I looked at both of them. Ah. Rings on the fingers. "You two married then?" I asked.

"Engaged." House replied.

I nodded. I knew I got some sort of gay vibe from the two of them. "You sure?" I asked.

"Pretty positive we're engaged yes." House replied sarcastically.

"About the room." I said.

"Jimmy has a bleeding heart. Thinking about you out there in your car with winter coming up." House mocked while putting an arm around Wilson who really wasn't amused.

"I can handle winter but if you're sure." I said.

"Yes, we are." Wilson said and moved House's arm off of him.

This is going to be interesting at least.

~~~

Ah, sleep. My old Buddy. Pal. The dude who never shows up when you need him. Like now.

On top of insomnia, I also have trouble sleeping in new places. That has been an issue even before insomnia popped up. The only reason I ever got decent sleep at overnight camps and retreats was that I would normally be physically exhausted.

There's also a clock ticking somewhere in the room which isn't helping.

Tick.

Nighttime is also the time where my mind is extremely vulnerable to not so great trains of thought.

Tock.

The past few weeks it's finally been kicking in that my Mom is actually dead. I'll never be able to talk to her again.

Tick.

When someone dies it's fairly normal to be in a sort of daze for a while. My auto-pilot is finally starting to wear out though. I haven't had the chance to really think about the past few months. Until now.

Tock.

I've had to put up a straight face. Try to keep my life together. Made my way to New Jersey. Got into Princeton Prep. Making money freelancing as a programmer. Volunteering at PPTH.

Tick.

I can't let this affect me now. I need to keep going. Later I'll take the time to deal with this. Later.

Tock.

Of course, you can't exactly schedule a breakdown, can you? No, I'm crying. Crying for the first time in the last few months. I had to be strong. I still do.

Tic-

I had decided to get up and shove the clock under a pillow in a closet. I slowly slid to the floor after. I closed my eyes to try and stop the flow of tears. She's really gone.

I slowly cried myself to sleep on the floor.

I was awoken by my phone alarm going off with the song American Idiot by Green Day because it's one of the loudest songs on my phone. I'm a heavy sleeper. Once I'm asleep.

My butt was a little sore from sleeping on the ground in a sitting position. I groaned and got up to get ready for the day. Trying to not think about last night.

Soon I made my way to the kitchen which had Wilson sitting at the counter reading the newspaper with a cup of coffee. House was nowhere in sight. I stood in the doorway not really wanting to make my presence known. I just zoned out in the direction of the window.

A few minutes later Wilson looked up from the newspaper and noticed me. He jumped a little. "How long have you been there Jay?" He asked.

I blinked and moved my gaze to Wilson. "Not long." I mumbled.

Wilson looked at his watch. "Well, afternoon. Sleep well?" He asked.

Not particularly. I was an idiot and fell asleep on the floor.

"Yeah slept great." I lied. I knew it was the afternoon of course. I have my alarm set for noon on the weekends in case I sleep in.

Wilson was looking me over. He could probably tell I lied. "Hungry? There are some pancakes in the fridge." Wilson asked.

 "Not particularly." I mumbled.

Wilson set down his coffee and newspaper. "You're too thin." He replied and got up to get me some pancakes anyway.

I slowly made my way to the counter. I know I'm too thin. Losing 20 pounds in the span of like a month? It's probably grief or something. Also, I often forget to eat when I'm busy and I've purposely been keeping myself very busy so situations like last night wouldn't happen.

"Don't you have any casual clothes to wear on the weekends?" Wilson asked after setting a plate of pancakes and orange juice in front of me.

Besides my hoodie, a Beatles tee shirt and a single pair of black jeans no. I didn't take the time to grab much else clothing-wise before I ran off from Minnesota. Also… Besides my more dressy stuff, most of my clothing was still women’s. Sure I've been out of the closet for almost 2 years now but because I wear mostly not casual clothing I've never really bothered. "I'm more used to dressing this way." I replied.

"You sure he's your son?" Wilson said to a tired House who just walked in.

"If he blow-dries his hair maybe he's yours." House joked while getting himself a cup of coffee and pancakes.

I finally stopped poking at my pancakes and took a bite. They're good.

"What no snippy comments today?" House asked me.

The truth would be to say that I'm mentally and emotionally exhausted because my brain decided to hit a brick wall at over 100 miles per hour last night but no one needs to know that. "Not a morning person." I replied. Not a lie either.

Wilson groaned at that. "See definitely yours it's midday."

I need an excuse to get out of this conversation. Homework? No, I have none because of my Midterms. I don't have any plans. 

I stood up. "I need to do some flips." I finally decided on.

When House didn't respond to that Wilson looked confused. "Woah. Wait! What? Flips?!" He asked.

"I'm a former gymnast. Met House in late August because I sprained my wrist over-rotating a backflip and stopped by the free clinic." I quickly explained wanting to get out the door.

"Wait hold up you've known House longer than me? You said you haven't known him for too long." Wilson said.

"Jealous?" House butted in.

"In the grand scheme of things. A few months isn't too long." I said.

Wilson looked like he wanted to protest that conclusion but didn't. "Gymnast?" He asked instead.

"I was a good one too." I said with a wink.

"Why'd you quit?" House asked.

"Ah. Another time. Bye!" I avoided while making my escape.

~~~

I wasn't planning on going to PPTH especially on the weekend but I remembered that I accidentally left one of my Latin books at the Cafeteria and I still need to study for that midterm so after doing some flips I hopped on a bus and made my way to the hospital.

"Uh called yesterday about my Latin book. Said you all were holding on to it." I said to the cashier.

"Oh yeah give me a few minutes." She said and went to grab it.

I was bobbing back and forth on the balls of my feet when a younger Doctor pointed at my messenger bag specifically at my Star Trek The Next Generation communicator pin. "Nice pin."

"Oh! Uh, thanks." I said turning to him.

"Here's your book." The cashier said and passed me my book.

"Thank you so much!" I said and got out of the line. "Haha sorry midterms you know." I said to the Doctor while putting the book in my bag.

"You're House's kid right?" He asked.

I froze. Has House told people about this already? He must know how quick stuff spreads at this hospital. I cleared my throat. "Yeah. Jay Flynn." I said and held out my hand.

"Dr. Lawrence Kutner liking Star Trek is already good in my book." He said with a smile.

Kutner… "You're part of House's Team right?" I asked.

He nodded. "Yeah, I've seen you around."

"You're working on a weekend?" I asked.

"I had some Clinic Duty to make up." He said.

"Ah." I said.

"You know I think I have some Next Generation DVDs in my locker if you want to watch some episodes?" Kutner asked.

I thought for a moment. I could definitely use a distraction and it's been a while since I've seen some Star Trek. "Yeah, that would be great actually." I said.

"Okay awesome let me go get it." Kutner said lighting up and running off.

Right… I don't think Kutner realized that I don't really have a good way to contact him.

AN: Sorry for the shorter chapter but like ehhhh had to you know introduce Duncan and have Jay move in. It’s not very clear in the fic AT ALL but like House and Wilson live in a house just to make things easier lmao. Why aren't they married? Well readers gay marriage is still illegal in New Jersey in 2009 so RIP but that DOES mean at some point in this series y'all get a Hilson wedding so like don’t be mad about it.

[aceofaces20]

What would be a valid thing to submit as evidence for adhd? I feel like my teachers never noticed anything, all it ever says on my report is 'quiet', and im in the uk and you need school reports for diagnosis, and i feel like i wont be taken seriously cos they dont say 'bouncing off the walls' or something

I feel you, nonny. I wasn’t diagnosed until college because I was just “quiet.”

Odds are, if a lot of the symptoms add up enough to make you SUSPECT you have ADHD, you probably have it. But more research is always good!

So like many things, ADHD is a spectrum. The two ends of it are Inattentive to Hyperactive- and then you have people like me, in the middle, with the Combined version. Some people have more Inattentive than Hyperactive, some have more Hyperactive than Inattentive. Everyone who has ADHD experiences the symptoms a little differently.

You can find about six thousand symptoms lists online, but here I’ll tell you things that usually don’t end up on those lists that my therapist told me a lot of her patients ended up experiencing aside from listed symptoms.

(Note: Initially I tried to keep these short. Yeah, that didn’t work. I bolded the important parts.)

1. Insomnia, or at least a super screwy sleep schedule. No joke, this can be super detrimental and will only serve to exacerbate your symptoms. “Just set a sleep schedule!! You’ll feel better!” they all say- Thanks Barbara if I had any control over when my brain chooses to sleep at all I wouldn’t have this issue, ok?

-a solution to this is to, in all actuality, condition yourself. Start ONLY using your bed for sleep. Get a little chair or something in your room if you’re also a hermit like I was growing up (mushroom chairs are gr9) and once you get out of bed, don’t let yourself get back on it for more than a few minutes unless you’re going to sleep.

Some nights it’s not enough, but in general for me personally this has been an actual lifesaver- I can go from being not tired to exhausted at the drop of a hat in normal life anyway (another symptom they don’t usually tell you about) so it’s nice to be able to make it work for me for once- I get into bed, maybe spend 30 minutes restless and then I’m out.

2. On the subject of sleep. You kids ever heard of the sleep of the dead? Because guess what, I have ignored literal fire alarms in dorms because of it. About 1-2 hours into my sleep I enter a state akin to a bear hibernating. I have slept through wake-up alarms, slept through emergency alerts, slept through FIRE alarms, slept though friends and family attempting to wake me… you get the picture.

3. On the note of the hibernating bear. You constantly wake up angry (or at least disgruntled) at the universe and take a really, really long time to power on. No, I’m not talking “a case of the mornings.” I’m talking it takes me until noon some days to actually feel somewhat alert. I’m talking feeling nothing but seething rage at anyone who tries to engage you in higher brain function before you’re fully awake.-the seething rage is more personal to me, but, every single last one of my friends who’s ADHD has issues getting up in the morning. There’s hating mornings, and then there’s hating mornings.

4. About mornings. You’re constantly late to anything in the morning because you just couldn’t “get going.” i.e., you knew and 100% wanted to get up and get moving but your brain said “nah, let’s just sit here on tumblr mobile for a while k?”-it’s very difficult to describe this part of executive dysfunction with words, because it comes off as laziness to a lot of neurotypicals. It’s not laziness. It’s having the motivation and and will and the drive to do something and not forgetting about it and it still doesn’t get done.

“Why didn’t you do x?” they’ll ask. And you just sit there thinking shit, you meant to, really, honest to god meant to, it was on your brain to do and yet all you could actually do that day was sit around and watch terrible TV. And then you feel terrible because YOU think you’re lazy.It’s not laziness. It’s executive dysfunction.

5. Another not so well known EXDYF fact: Mental math or memorization for you will always be the literal bane of your existence. Teachers always told me I was a “smart kid” in school (I am, but not the point) and then they’d wonder why I couldn’t memorize a five line poem.

Or I’d start off with a 60 on a math test, until my teacher would comb through my work by hand (only useful math teacher I ever had in high school tbh) and I’d end up with a 92 because nearly all of my mistakes involved basic arithmetic errors. Even though I was able to use a calculator on the test.

(One time I decided 21-19=14. To this day 8 years later I still do not know from what abyss my brain pulled that info from.)

“You’re smart! Just focus!” I can’t choose what my brain decides to focus on that easily, Sharon, not without a lot of crying and panicking.

6. But wait! You say. I have really obscure information from a fandom that I can infodump on someone at a moment’s notice! Surely that means I’m just Lazy and Unmotivated, right? I guess I just can’t be bothered to memorize the important stuff.

*Loud buzzer noise* Stop right there. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200.

I will take you by the shoulders and look deep into your eyes and make you realize that guess what? If you have an ADHD brain, you have NO control over telling your brain what is important and what is not. Zero. Zip. Zilch. Nada. Your brain decides, and you usually get no say in the matter.

This sounds bad, I know. And in terms of school, birthdays, appointments, it’s terrible. But you’re not helpless. It sounds trite, but, get a good goddamn calendar app on your phone and use the hell out of it for appointments and birthdays. And for school? Find those fandoms and use mnemonics. No, seriously.

7. Also on school: You procrastinate the hell out of everything. And I’m not talking normal “haha I’ll do it later!” procrastination. I’m talking serious, problematic, REPEATED “why the fuck can’t I just do it on time like a normal person” procrastination where you start blaming yourself for not doing it sooner like a neurotypical.

Listen, buddy ol’ pal (or however that goes), you’re not neurotypical. But listen- there’s actually a medical reason why you do this.

So everyone’s brains have reward systems, right? Your brain gives you the feel good when you do something you think you should. And later, a brain remembers that it got the feel good for doing the thingy thing.

In a brain with ADHD, that reward system malfunctions. Sometimes critically. Your brain chucks so much stuff it deems “unnecessary” out the window it chucked out that feel good you got when you turned in that homework on time, or cleaned out your car, or did some pilates for 30 minutes.

8. You want to know what doesn’t help with number 7 there? Another thing that won’t show up on symptom lists but that virtually everyone I know with ADHD (quite a few, actually. Turns out we hang out in packs because we’re usually the only people who can understand each other) about ADHD is how daunting large tasks or projects seem to an ADHDer.

So listen, more medical talk here. Remember that EXDYF thing? Yeah, this is part of that.

EXDYF makes it very, very hard (almost impossible, sometimes) to break down large tasks into smaller, more feasible tasks. You get nervous the longer you put off that paper (“this isn’t something you can spit out overnight!”) You’ve been sitting in front of your computer for hours, and the only word you have written down is “The”.

Honestly, I’m not sure why it’s actually super hard to break down large undertakings into smaller tasks for the ADHD brain. But! Solution.

-if you’re having a problem breaking down ANY sort of task, I promise there’s someone else who’s done it online.

Need to write a paper? Use a template. Need to clean out your car? Find a checklist, or have a friend make you one (cause Lord knows I can’t make one on my own). Need to make a presentation? Find a sample one online. Hell, this even works for taxes. (Gasp!)

Do NOT be afraid to ask for help with even personal large undertakings. If your friends are actually your friends, then they’ll relish the chance. Especially when you can turn around and blaze through a quarter of the important project you two (or however many) have due next week in four hours because of hyperfocus.

9. So, your focus. Totally trash, right? That is, until you hyperfocus.

Hyperfocus, to a neurotypical, probably sounds great. Tune out all distractions and get shit done, right?

Sure, Linda, if you can call being able to ignore things like the need to sleep, eat, and use the bathroom “tuning out distractions.” Time becomes a literal illusion. And damn do you pay for it later by your brain not wanting to do anything at all.

On the flip side, this is why ADHD people make fantastic emergency workers like EMTs and firepeople. If you learn what to do with adrenaline when you start feeling it, you feel like you could punch Satan himself when you’re riding an adrenaline+hyperfocus high. Combine that with the fast-paced, unexpected nature of such jobs and and you have a happy ADHD brain because it’s never bored.

10. Because boredom feels like death. No, Cheryl, I’m not being overdramatic. Yes, Becky, I recognize everyone has to deal with boredom.

A neurotypical’s boredom and an ADHDer’s boredom are two very different levels of boredom. Ever heard the phrase “bored to tears”? Now imagine every time you get even a little bored, it’s like this.

And of course, the ADHD hell brain remembers the bad feels of being bored but can’t recall how nice it was to remember all of the answers on a quiz that one time you paid attention in class.This is why I have the worst problems doing homework and housework, or in general anything with serious repetition (exercise, cooking, driving, tidying up etc.). I can do it for maybe 10-15 minutes, and then my brain’s like “k I’m good. Next source of input please?” like, brain, I’m only like 3 feet into washing the kitchen floor. P l s.

11. Speaking of tears. Has rejection by someone you value ever felt like you wanted to quit existing on the spot, or at the very least wanted to move to an ice cave in Greenland and cry for the rest of your life? Even if the rejection was just perceived rejection and your friend was just expressing grumpiness at something else?

Even if your logic says “they didn’t reject you calm down you’re overreacting?”

Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria. It’s a newer term, but honestly, once I found out about my own ADHD and this bitch of a symptom a loooooooot of my weird habits started making a lot of sense in my head.

It doesn’t have to be actual “rejection”. It can get set off from stuff like awkwardness (hence my personal resistance to making Adult Phone Calls) to disbelief (a huge, huge reason so many people go undiagnosed), to personal judgment and/or criticisms (oh, ok… I guess I’ll never mention my love for X ever again) to even just indifference (no one noticed I mopped all the floors in the house… guess I’ll just go die!).

Basically, if you perceive that someone you care about has dismissed you in some fashion, you literally just want to quit existing. On the spot. Because the feeling of it makes you feel sick, your chest gets tight, you can feel it in your hands, and it makes the rest of your day miserable.This variant is more likely with people you care about, but can definitely 100% happen with strangers too.

Another variant is this: if you perceive that someone (whether you care about them or not) has dismissed you in some fashion, your first instinct is to attempt to disregard and discard them completely. It usually doesn’t work like you want it to.

I’m pretty sure this is another reason why ADHD people hang out in packs. We always have a line in our head we’re terrified to cross with our friends. It makes us seem like we’re emotionally unavailable- but in reality we’re just terrified of being dismissed by our friends for showing our true geeky, infodumping, hyperfixating selves.

(Listen. If a friend mocks you for your true self they weren’t your friend in the first place.)

12. But in terms of crossing that line… Social cues? What are social cues?

Normal people can infer a lot from body language. With a lot of ADHD people, we tend not to notice. Or we notice too much and overanalyze. There’s no in between.

On a side note, your best bet for flirting successfully with an ADHDer is to just come out and say it. (Talk like an elcor. “Flirtatiously: I want to hear more.” or whatever innocent phrase it is you’re using to flirt. If they’re into Mass Effect, this will make them laugh, which means bonus points for you in their eyes.)But seriously, unless you’re making obviously romantic overtures we’re usually pretty sure you’re just being nice.

Back on topic: lack of social ability is a massive, massive reason people with ADHD are usually bullied growing up. If there aren’t any other ADHD people around, it usually feels like no one “gets” you. I was bullied horribly enough during junior high and high school to the point where I still have to repress the urge to automatically assume someone being nice to me means they’re plotting something behind my back. (Didn’t help that my hs was basically the Korriban Sith academy without most of the death. Culty, religious, nepotism ran rampant.)

13. Woe betide thee who angers the ADHD. It's not a problem with everyone, but... We’re like volcanoes. Awe-inspiring to watch in action, but God help you if we explode in your direction. And if it’s righteous anger there is almost literally no stopping us.

Anger has its uses. Our problem is that, like a volcano, we always have a lot simmering under the surface. We tend to hold onto it for ridiculous amounts of time until one day, boom. Yeah, I know, Kathy, that happens with everyone. Delayed gratification and all. The difference with ADHDers is that we usually don’t wait.

ADHDers’ anger will come out initially, because we can’t suppress it. We’re impulsive as fuck. We don’t think before we leap (our brains probably wouldn’t let us anyway). And it will seem like we are flying off the handle for no reason whatsoever. But we also have a tendency to unhealthily hold onto it afterwards even once the initial burst has happened. It’s like a (bad!) positive feedback loop.

14. Gotta bounce the leg. Gotta rock. Gotta fidget. Shit, I’m sorry, were you talking?

So one time I made it through 40 minutes of a math class actively suppressing the urge to bounce my leg… and then my leg twitched of its own accord. Freaky as shit, 0/10 recommend.

Sitting still is physically impossible for me, and for a lot of ADHDers. Lack of impulse control + lack of social cue knowledge + lack of ability to decide what’s important to our brains = Fidget fidget. Fidget fidget. Twitch. Fiddle with paper. Hey, my backpack has a fun texture by the zipper. Oh my God, that lady on the TV is wearing the best shade of blue ever! I wonder where she got it. Shit, I need to go shopping. Wait, why did I need to go shopping again?

“Hey I asked you what you got for number 7.”

Fuck.

15. Depressive episodes. For me, these usually happen after a major hyperfocus where I taxed my brain for all it was worth, especially for long periods of time.

If it lasts for a long time or starts seriously affecting your life, get it checked out. If your doctor gives a damn they’ll be happy you came in to get it checked, even if it was the wrong diagnosis, because if it had been then at least they were there to help you. And they’ll always be happy to sit down and figure out what’s wrong. I know they have to watch out for hypochondriacs and whatnot. But if a doctor really cares about helping people they’ll listen when you say something’s wrong, because they know that you’re the one in your skin, not them. Which means if you really think something might be wrong, something probably is.

More evidence: justexecutivedysfunctionthings here on tumblr. Contains people’s experiences with EXDYF, which is a huge red flag for ADHD.

The Wikipedia article on the subject. There’s a nicely organized chart. (Or at least there was when I looked at it.) Remember, you don’t have to identify with all of the symptoms to be ADHD. Even if you only identify with a few, if they’re significant enough that they are seriously impacting your life and existence, it’s worth getting checked out.

I may add more to this later/change some stuff as my memory allows.

[flame-cat]

id ask abt something w ender eye ryan because thats such a cool AU ???? aaa

thanks for sending this! i wrote this on my phone so ill make it easier to read later lol. i imagine this takes place the night before ryans confrontation with gavin.

The worst part is that he can’t sleep anymore.

It was bad enough before, with chronic insomnia. The others could tell when he was starting to reach his wit’s end. Too many thoughts buzzing in his head, too many sensations keeping sleep just out of his grasp.

On those nights, the bad nights, he would wake up someone else- usually Jeremy or Gavin. They were the best at not asking too many questions (“When was the last time you slept?” “What’s keeping you up?” “Why don’t you just sleep?”). Instead, Jeremy would agree to help with menial things, chopping wood or cleaning things, or Gavin would just talk and talk and talk about nothing, until Ryan would finally feel his eyelids grow heavy and the other would guide him back to bed to sleep through late into the next day.

But this wasn’t something a bit of distracting conversation could fix. It wasn’t a buzz of energy in the back of his head. This was grating, a slithering weed in his brain that ate at his paranoia and dug between cracks and pushed until he felt like his skull would split open.

He knew it was the eye. He had known as soon as he had regained his sight. The problem was he didn’t think taking it out would fix it anymore. It was embedded in him now, wires creaking, taut, squeezing and pushing, a plug forcing its way into an overloaded socket. If he tried to remove it now, sparks would fly, and he couldn’t be sure how much damage that might cause. He knew he would just have to wait and see what happened, whether this was managable in the long run, the risks enough to take. He knew he had to be careful.

That didn’t make it any easier.

It’s been five days, and Ryan knows he’s losing his shit. He looks in the mirror, he looks at himself and he sees something else, a black skull and a manic grin wreathed in purple fire- he hears whispers and sniffs and groans and music, he swears he can hear just the faintest notes of a melody, somewhere, so distantly- he feels his head pound and his eyes burn and his chest ache.

It’s all so much, and he wants to curl up in a ball and close his eyes and get away from it but he can’t because it’s still in there, still creaking away in his head and his ender eye still sees when he closes it, still sees bright lights and symbols and he swears he’s gonna go crazy trying to figure out what it even means because he knows it means something-

THUD THUD THUD.

Ryan jolts so harshly he falls off the bed and heavily onto his side, causing pain to burst in his arm. His door- someone had knocked on his door. What time is it?

He slowly lurches to his feet, careful of the way his vision blacks around the edges like a bad sepia filter. “Coming,” he rasps- his throat is dry, when did that happen? Had he been panting?- and stalks over to open the door.

Greeting him is Jeremy’s surprised face, hand raised as if to knock again. His shock and worry appear to redouble at Ryan’s appearance.

“Ryan, hey, what’s up buddy?” he says, not keeping concern out of his voice.

Ryan clears his throat and leans against the doorframe. “Nothing really.” He glances outside. “Shouldn’t you be asleep this late at night?”

“Shouldn’t you?” Jeremy shoots back.

Ryan runs a hand through his hair. “I- well, you know I don’t always sleep well-”

“Yeah, and I also know you usually go to somebody before it gets this bad,” Jeremy sighs. “I don’t wanna intrude or anything, but you’re really worrying me here, man. Even Gavin’s starting to notice something’s up.”

“Wait, he is? Shit.” If Gavin was catching on, that means just about everyone is getting worried about him now. Great. “Don’t worry about me, Jeremy, and tell Gavin not to worry either. Or anyone. I’m fine, just a little…” He trails off. What is he, exactly?

“Tired?” finishes Jeremy, and the way he says it is confirmation enough for Ryan that he’s not buying it. “Something really is wrong, and I just wanna see if I can help in any way. That’s it.”

Ryan huffs and rubs his eyes. “I’m just tired, Jeremy. I’ll be fine. In fact, I was actually just trying to sleep when you stopped by.” Not technically untrue. Whether it was working was besides the point.

The white lie seems to have sated Jeremy, at least for now. He gives him a long, thoughtful look. “Alright,” he says at length. “Get some rest. see you in the morning.”

“Goodnight, Jeremy.”

“‘Night, Ryan.”

[rockandrollnightschool]

Dear Max 18 Months

Hey buddy, 

This is a few weeks late, and I’m sure as you read this, you will better understand why. 

First let’s talk about you. Boy did you really grow up a lot in the last month. We had your 18 month well visit at the doctor and she said you’re in perfect health. You’ve got a giant head, but that’s just more of you to love and it’s not a health concern. Seriously, you’re head is in the 95 percentile. That’s ok, Dad has a giant head too. It’s just more space to store the names of all the villains in Batman’s Rogue’s gallery and other crucial information. You got a shot and a finger prick for blood work and you handled it as expected. You were bummed. It looked like we got in a fight after the finger prick because you thrashed around a bit while I was holding you and got blood all over me. I told everyone you won. 

You’re talking a lot more. We’re up to like 8 words I think and you actually know what some of them mean. You’re using “No” when you actually mean “no”. You’ve been saying “Uh oh” a lot, “this”, “ma ma” and just the other day you did the best thing ever. You pointed to a photo of me that you were playing with and said “Da da” It really warmed my heart. You’ve even been surprising us with words. I haven’t heard them yet, but your mom reports that you’ve said “grandma” and “please”. Pretty soon we’ll be having real conversations! I can’t wait!

We’ve started working on weening you away from using a bink. You now know that they are only for naps and bedtime and they stay in your room. Just the other day, I went in to get you out of your crib in the morning and when I walked up, you took the bink out of your mouth and handed it to me without asking. I was so proud of how much your learning. Same with you knowing your bedtime process. I say “alright Max, time for night night” and you run give mom a hug, run to the door to your room, run in when I open it, look for a book to read on your shelf, hand it to me, and crawl up into my lap. After I finish the book, I say “alright, what’s next?” and you turn to your lamp and wave “bye bye” and then we turn it off. You cuddle into my shoulder and I put you in bed. Your favorite book right now is “Brown Bear Brown Bear What Do You See” If we can teach you to clean up your to toys the way you have the bedtime routine down, we’d be doing great. 

Things have been hard at home in 2017. Mom and I made a goal of making 2017 miles better than 2016 was, but so far, it’s been a challenge. Your mom and I both believe in the de-stigmatization of mental health issues so she gave me permission to write about this.  It all started on January 1st. I’d been having some abdominal pains for a few days, nothing serious, but enough that I decided to go to urgent care. Urgent care wasn’t able to diagnose me and sent me to the ER. The ER admitted me to the hospital overnight, but eventually found nothing and determined it was probably just a strained muscle. This just sets the scene. 

Your mom is a strong woman. One of the strongest I know. By now, you’ve probably heard about the day you were born and how it took 35 hours, 24 of which were unmedicated, to bring you into the world. That’s a type of work you and I will never experience. She has been your day to day caregiver while I go to work, she’s dealt with her own life, she’s battled postpartum depression, and we’ve dealt with all the issues life throws into a marriage. All of that takes a toll on a person. Your mom was having anxiety issues, but she wanted to try to handle them on her own by therapy and mindfulness and not through any sort of medication. My hospitalization was the last cup of water that caused the dam to break though. Your mom had some insomnia issues, sleeping only an hour or two a night. This would leave her frazzled and anxious during the day and unable to take care of you on her own, which would make her sad. After working with her doctor, it was decided that mom has acute anxiety disorder and needed some medication to manage her anxiety and something to help her get some good sleep. 

Your grandparents really stepped up to help us. Grammy and Papa let us all live with them for just over a week. After a few days, we decided to let you go to Grandma and Grandpa’s for 2 days while your mom and I stayed and Grammy and Papa’s without you so that your mom could spend the whole day resting. She was very sad that she couldn’t take care of you the way she wanted. It was not easy for us to do. We missed you so much! Your grandparents have you for sleepovers at least 2-3 times a month so mom and dad can have dates and it’s always hard for us to let you go, but this was even harder. 

Things are getting so much better though. Mom is feeling way better. She’s sleeping better and her anxiety has lessened. Life is getting back to normal and we’re going to begin our “2017: What 2016 should’ve been” initiative soon. 

I can’t avoid writing about current events because it’s important. Since the last letter, Donald Trump has been sworn in as President. He’s signed numerous executive orders, many of which have hurt certain classes of people. He picks fights with people on Twitter. There’s genuine concern from a lot of people, even people in his own party, about the direction of our country. The problem  is, very few of those people in his party have the spine to cross their party lines because they have to think about re-election. We’ve now got some very unqualified people in charge of things like our nation’s education. All I can say is that I’m glad that you’re still young enough that I don’t have to explain these things to you right now. I hope that by the time you’re school aged, we’ll have been able to un-do or prevent a lot of the damage that I’m expecting to be done in the coming 4 years. Private education was a luxury that I had but it’s not one that I think Mom and Dad will be able to provide for you and so public education’s future is of particular concern to us. 

Here’s the thing we’ve learned though. There’s no more ability to sit and watch. I’m not the “go out and march” type anymore sadly (your dad went to a few protests in the George W. Bush days, but even those were rare for me to attend), but I am understanding the need to get involved, especially at a local level. I’m going to start paying more attention to our local school board, city council meetings, and things happening in the state. I’m encouraging your mom to get engaged with me so we can work together to protect your future. Maybe we’ll have baby’s first city council meeting soon. 

I think that’s everything for right now. I’ll have another letter in a couple of weeks. But until then, your mom and I both love you like crazy. We’re so proud of who your becoming already and so happy you came into our lives. You just keep doing what you’re doing. 

Love,  Dad