#I’d take off running

[leonsliga]

Second career maybe? Leon would make a fantastic lawyer, he would have the opponent shaking in his boots lmao

He can’t lose with retorts like this:

[angeltannis]

Crazy that using online payment methods with buyer protection is now considered Old and Boomerish

[yuwuta]

if you have an argument and want space to cool off/time to yourself who is letting you actually peaceful sleep by yourself in the guest bedroom/your own apartment and who is sleeping at the foot of the bed like a sad dog pleading for you to forgive them

[totally-not-an-awkward-okapi]

New campaign and two sessions in I’m obsessed with these freaks, we’ve got:

Selenia Sungazer, a vampire paladin straddling the line between elegant Dracula and monstrous Nosferatu…

Jaina, a human rogue doing her best to bring some common sense to this group…

…and my very own Corvus Mirrin, a grave cleric who’s already managed to inflict more damage on their fellow party member (Selenia) then they’ve healed.

[fingertipsmp3]

Why must dieting be absolutely fucking miserable

[a-ikuoliver]

time for my annual message to my old teacher

[carpisuns]

theOrEticalLy . if I opened commissions at some point. would there be. a smackerel of interest . ??

[arolesbianism]

Ive been waiting for ages in oni for my future industrial block to be vacuumed out so I decided to doodle some furry women while I waited (it’s still not done)

[rosicheeks]

Oh it would be so easy to hunt you down. I’d just toy with you, calling out to you “Rosie my sweet trophy. Why do you hide? You know you want this.” Then as soon as I find you my hand would be clasped over your mouth before you even have a chance to scream whilst my other hand roughly tears at your clothes so I can slide inside you. “Oh…why are you so wet if you don’t want this? I can see the fear in your eyes and feel your screams against my hand but your pussy is telling a different story.”

🫠

[star-mum]

"comfort for what? HAVING A BODY" you continue to be fucking iconic. like that entire rant had me CLAPPING but that part in particular was just oOOOOMF. that was it so like.... Gar x fat reader where Gar hugs her and his instincts go feral because feeling someone with extra fat on their body ignites his breeding kink?? like his animal brain is like "this is a wife. this is a wife who will bear your children and do it well. this is a plump, healthy body for your children. you're gonna fuck her brains out" and he gets a raging boner in what is supposed to be an innocent hug and has to excuse himself and wants to die of embarrassment and the reader is like INTRIGUED by him from that moment on but then he keeps dodging her and avoiding her because of his personal embarrassment

(set during s2 with a reader who is physically affectionate for no reason and would just give him a random hug)

thoughts?

I had to actually take a break when the words “breeding kink” showed up— LIKE THE GENIUS OF THAT ??? AND ABSOLUTELY HE WOULD AAAAAAAAAAA

Me reading this:

So,,, uhm things got a bit out of hand skskks and I talked way to much as usual so,,,

OKAY— so yes to everything you just said !! I can just SEE everyone’s in one the common areas (maybe a post training snack or breakfast, let’s say breakfast 🥴) and Gar’s standing with his back to the door talking to the rest of the group as the coffee machine does it’s thing and reader just walks up to them, greets everyone good morning and hugs Gar from the back, maybe rests her head either on his arm/shoulder so she can join the conversation OR on his back cause she’s just so tired and he just MALFUNCTIONS !!!

Everyone is still in pijamas and she’s not really wearing a bra, so he can feel her chest pressed up against him and hOMEBOY’S DOING FUCKING BREATHING EXERCISES IN HIS HEAD TO CALM HIMSELF DOWN !!! Whoever he was talking to — probs Rachel — goes “you,,, okay dude ?? you look,,, very intense in the face” and he freaks out, not thinking on an excuse quick enough and just BOUNCES “what?! 😧 Uhh yeah yeah im good,,, i just have to,,, i have to go now”

Also not to, once again, pull up my brazilian card BUT we have a habit of greeting people with a hug and a kiss on the cheek — it can be a real like kiss on the cheek or that like fake one sksksk where you touch the side of their face with your face and make a kiss noise KSKSKS most common to do that actually — my friends and I see each other every night in college but we still greet each other like that every time and less cause it’s the “polite thing to do” and more cause its a way to show we like each other and we’re close

SO— in my head, reader — who’s me cause,,,, who the hell else would she be sksksks — does that every morning. It’s a habit !! And when she asked the team if it would make them uncomfortable, to greet them like that, they said no !! So everyone’s getting a hug when she sees them, specially like the ones who don’t live in the tower the whole time !

And that’s fun in TWO different ways CAUSE

1. Gar really likes it and gets all weird about it later, cause the more times he gets turned on by her touching, the more innocent touches start making it happen too

2. POSSESSIVE ANIMAL INSTINCT BABY !!!! I hate — not really — to bring them into this BUT i feel like the ones who’d make Gar the more jealous of are -> Jason and Hank (stop rolling your eyes I have a nom biased explanation KSKSKSKS)

Jason is more of a logical jealousy, he’s hot, he’s their age AND he’s a major flirt/fuck boy sksksk even if it’s in jest or a friendly flirting when Reader hugs him or touches him, he’s still gonna say some bullshit like “i know im hot babe, but you really gotta stop touching me like in front of everyone” or “can’t keep your hands off me huh?” I desire him carnally

Hank is more of a — Absolutely One Sided — physical/animal instinct thing for suuuure. Like out of all the guys, he’s definitely an the closest thing we have to a Natural Alpha, he’s big, he’s strong, he’s agressive and dominant (not sexually but how he holds himself around other ppl) and Gar would just FEEL some sort of anger and jealousy when he sees Reader giving Hank any type of attention, even tho he KNOWS nothing’s ever going to happen (cause 1. Hanks not a fucking predator and 2. He’s very clearly with Dawn) — it definitely would NOT help if Reader let slip something about finding Hank hot/attractive, during a forced teens game night maybe? KSSKKSKS

She’d know RIGHT AWAY something’s off with Gar — cause she swears she saw his eyes turn green after a particularly Fuck Boy-ish quip got Jason a little slap on his arm/chest — he’s both avoiding her like the plague but also ALWAYS standing very close to her in social situations — on the off chance she holds onto him — so she’d up the antee completely -> push him til he breaks

And oh boy does he ever 🥵 Breeding Kink Gar is just supreme, I am not sorry

like I have personally a very clear stance about not wanting kids AND not wanting to experience pregnancy BUT IN FICTION ????? GIVE ME THE BREEDING KINK !! GIVE ME THE GETTING MARRIED AND HAVING KIDS !! THERE IS NO CONSEQUENCES TO MY ACTIONS !!!! LETS FUCKING GOOOO

[autoneurotic]

working at an art store is like. the best and worst thing i’ve ever done. every weekend i am tested. people come in buying so much paint and canvases and i ask what are you going to paint and they almost always show me pictures of their stuff OR if i’m really lucky, they want their stuff framed and i can see the real deal! i’m so locked in to oil, it’s really fun to talk to other painters about their mediums of choice. like, i havent tried acrylics in probably two years? and i’ve certainly only gotten better at painting since then, i should revisit it! or folks buying beads and jewellery making stuff. i’d like to try that :)

[goldennika]

omg you guys someone asked me out on bumble before we even matched ???? 😳🙈

[gingerwerk]

I did Far too many adult side quests today on top of working retail q4 so I am getting hammered while making dinner and hoping I’m not hungover af at work tomorrow

[thevaudevillescene]

i put this to you, erin. i don't think you could handle being squatted by kris. i think you would not survive.

Ella, you are almost certainly correct. I wouldn’t survive one shift as Kris Statlander’s Designated Person To Be Squatted. But I’d die a true hero’s death and go out doing what I love most: being lifted off the ground by a woman with incredible muscles. I’m currently staring at the ceiling with tears in my eyes picturing it.

[fingertipsmp3]

I swear to god, if Taylor Swift ends up being the reason I take up running and stick to it, it’s going to be the most embarrassing but also on-brand thing that’s ever happened to me

[parasolids]

i’m like sisyphus except the boulder is basic biological functioning