#I won't get sad from no feedback if I don't even post it! So my plan was I finish writing and post it and then no feedback was no problem

[akemi-snow]

Chapters: 1/? Relationships: Hagane Kotetsu/Kamizuki Izumo  Summary:

At age 25, Kotetsu throws out a question: "Where would I be without you?" Casual, distracted, a rethorical question. However, it leads Izumo into a deep thinking to imagine really where Kotetsu would be without him.

Because it's an interesting question, when asked by Kotetsu. Because while most people could track meeting their best friend in school, at the candy shop, in the park, or somewhere uninteresting where they could have met anyone else and where their lives wouldn't change a whole lot if they had never met, Kotetsu was the only one who could say that if he hadn't met Izumo, he would probably, quite literally, be dead, gone rogue, or still be missing since age three, living alone in the woods, barely verbal, and more an animal than a person.

The story of how Kotetsu at age 7 had been missing and isolated from civilization for so long, he refused to let anyone near him; except the one kid who, after a bad first meeting, started giving him what no one else had offered him before, and what would, in their adult years, transform into something even greater: genuine care, patience, and love.

------

*slaps the roof of this fic*

I started a new baby.

[genericpuff]

wait wait wait, regarding that Minthe post, you're telling me that Rachel literally wrote the character as having BPD.....and portrayed her as an abusive mean piece of shit??? WOW. fucking WOW. sorry for being so angry, but even if she "retconned" that - it's still so god damn disrespective. as someone who has BPD it hurts so much to see my mental illness villanised :(

ugh I'm so sorry pal. and I don't blame you for being angry about it, like I don't even have BPD and I'M fucking pissed LOL like I can understand why Rachel might have wanted to backtrack from that knowing fully well that Minthe's story wasn't gonna have a happy ending, but writing her with BPD in the first place and then BACKTRACKING from it as soon as she likely got heat for it (or just realized it wasn't a good look) isn't much better because it means now all she's done is written the stigmatized negative effects of BPD into her character without showing the more positive outlooks of healing and managing. Maybe that was doomed to happen considering Minthe is someone who doesn't get a happy ending in the myths, but it begs the question of why she'd write her with BPD to begin with because in hindsight it really does seem like she just wanted to use it as a way to make her "evil".

But like, when you read the actual episode, you can SEE the potential there for character growth, you can SEE that she's aware of her actions - but doesn't understand why she's "like that" which is a VERY common feeling among people with undiagnosed mental illnesses - but it was never meant to be.

Like jfc not only is it HEAVILY IMPLIED, but again, the episode is literally called "Splitting". And we see exactly that with Minthe, who can't seem to rationalize with herself that she messed up.

But... that leads me to another point that I failed to mention in that first ask response: she DIDN'T mess up. Like, yes, she messed up by escalating it to the point of slapping Hades, but it wasn't her fault that she didn't make it to her date with Hades. Whose fault was it?

Continuously throughout the first season we see Thetis being an awful influence who manipulates and gaslights Minthe. They're "friends", but it's clear Thetis does not have Minthe's best interests in mind. In this very scene we see Thetis manipulate Minthe and even attempt to get her so drunk that she won't be able to show up to her date. And then of course when that plan works and Minthe freaks out, Thetis spins it around on Minthe in a very passive-aggressive way.

But of course, the narrative has to find a way to turn this whole thing on Minthe being the bad guy. Hence we get the slap which shifts the focus entirely away from what led up to it back onto Hades who has, in a lot of ways, put her in a situation that she can't control. And of course, being in those kinds of situations does not help with mental health.

Like, sorry, I'm really going off here now, but... the slap happens in Episode 76.

When is it finally addressed again? Episode 103.

It took Rachel nearly THIRTY EPISODES to finally bring it back to Minthe, and in that time the reader has spent SEVERAL EPISODES reading about how sad and lonely Hades is, and about how cute and lovey he is with Persephone. The reader has not had ANY time to reflect on Minthe's circumstances, because it completely pivots away from her to focus on H x P as a sort of distraction from the fact that Minthe is a victim in her own right.

And when it DOES return to Minthe in 103, we get this harrowing reminder that her entire life is dependent on Hades-

And once again, here comes Thetis to the "rescue", reinforcing the negative feedback loop that Minthe is trapped in where she's put in unhealthy situations. She drags her to a bar and the whole time Minthe is not having fun because she's understandably still reeling from what happened.

Now we DO get some character development here, where Minthe realizes exactly what I've just finished explaining, that Thetis isn't her friend, that she'd rather not have Thetis as a friend than continue being talked down to and manipulated.

But then, as we know, because Rachel still needs Minthe to be the "bad guy", the breakup between Hades and Minthe winds up being all about Persephone from a POV that attempts to villainize Minthe for being "jealous" (rather than focusing on how shitty Hades actually is for having an emotional affair with Persephone to begin with) and then Minthe goes right back to hanging out with Thetis anyways for the sake of having the "evil other girl" who wants to "ruin" H x P's relationship.

It's not until Season 3 that we finally see Minthe tell Thetis to fuck off for good, but by then it's too little too late, and Minthe has lost an entire character arc. Rachel tries to go "see! Minthe's life is so much better now that she's taking care of children!" but that's an entirely different solution to a problem Minthe never had. She never got treatment for her BPD. She just got away from H x P which, while is a good thing, isn't actually analyzed as such. It's treated more as a "good thing" for H x P and the readers, because now they don't have to be subjected to Minthe's evil scheming anymore, something something "the evil is defeated". And don't even get me started on this comic's problem with constantly resolving female characters' story arcs through motherhood.

It bums me out so fucking much. Minthe deserved so much better. She's one of the many characters in LO who make it so painfully ironic when they're done dirty, because despite Rachel's attempts to write a "feminist retelling" that focuses on "moving on from trauma", she's inadvertently done more damage to feminism and the stigmas around mental health and trauma through her assassination of grounded and realistic and relatable characters like Minthe and Demeter who are shown ZERO empathy or understanding for their actions (unless it can be done so by making Persephone and Hades into the heroes). It happens so often throughout the comic it almost feels like how the comic markets itself as a "progressive feminist retelling" is some sick joke that I'm just not getting.

[kaledya]

HOWDY!!🌟🌟 I haven't been active on Tumblr for a long time, to be honest I haven't been active on any platform until recently.

I think it would be right to make a small update and let my followers know what's on my mind.

(And a little note, I am writing this article from a translation. If there is a mistake in any sentence or if it sounds rude, I sincerely apologize.)

First of all, I would like to talk about why I am  less active than before.

I don't want to go into too much detail about it, so I'll keep it short, and it'll be easier for you too!

I have a disease that worsens with stress, and I can say that this disease has leveled up because I have been stressed a lot lately due to some events.Now, for no reason or if I put too much pressure on that arm area my joints and arm start to ache. This means I can't draw for 2-3 days.In general, it means that I try not to use my arm too much.

But don't worry, thanks to my doctor I'm getting better quickly and I don't have as much ache anymore, much less! Almost gone now!!🌟🌟🌟🎉

And besides these, I was trying to get accepted to the university, but I learned that my drawing skills were not enough for the animation university!( I knew this actually, my anatomy is really bad but I wanted to try my luck) It's a little sad, but I'm not discouraged!🫡

 (I think my only regret was that my arm started to hurt in the middle of the exam after I had come such a long way. Why on earth would anyone make two one and a half hour art exams back to back??) Show some mercy to the students!!)😭😭

༼⁠;⁠´⁠༎ຶ⁠ ⁠۝ ⁠༎ຶ⁠༽

I just need to focus on more art skills  and I will do that!! From now on, I will focus only on improving myself and my arts! YIPPE!!

About  HH SS AU or My's OC development

It saddens me to say this, but even though I've been drawing in the HazbinHotel fandom for months, I've lost my inspiration at the moment.I probably won't be able to share any content about HazbinHotel until I regain my inspiration because I can't think of an idea or get excited about series anymore.But of course this is a temporary thing, my fandom had faded before but then it blossomed again!!

This is valid for SSAU as well, I don't have any inspiration to develop AU or draw for AU right now. 

And thank you very much to my followers who have liked and supported my HazbinHotel content so far!!!

Same goes for my OCs, I'm putting my OCs like Constantine and Serenity and the archangels on the shelf for now.Of course I will use them again in the future when I get inspired about them again, I love my babies!

About SSAU inspired fanfics Thank you again for loving this AU and for being inspired to write your own fanfic!!!

It makes me really happy to see you having fun And it makes me proud to see that I inspire people!! 

But from now on I don't prefer to use my HH OCs to write Fanfics,There are a few reasons for this but the main one is that I can't give you much feedback anymore and I wanted you to know that and I really don't want to upset or disappoint anyone when it comes to feedback.

Of course the fics about SSAU that have been written so far can continue, I have no problems with them, have fun!! I just want you to know I won't be able to give feedback  to you, or it will take a long time 

 This is of course temporary, I will let you know when I return to this fandom or change my mind about this!!

Some people ask about YouTube, I don't plan on posting any content on YouTube anytime soon.

Thank you in advance for respecting my opinions!

In short, yes, these are what I was going to say. It can be said that I have switched to the Gravity Falls fandom at the moment and I am sort of making my childhood dream come true by giving fanart to this fandom.And this is something that makes me very happy. 

Good morning, and in case I don't see ya, good afternoon, good evening, and good night!

[simpjaes]

One of my fav enha writers elix8r on here just announced that they were leaving and it just made me so sad to see someone leave due to people not appreciating their work and it made me think of you and how you’re literally one of my only fav writers who haven’t left this site and I hope you never do cause ily so much and I was wondering how we could show you more appreciation for giving us amazing fics? Like I know you’re loved by so many people and get good numbers on notes but still like I don’t want to lose you too so lmk if there’s anything else we can do for you to make you know we appreciate everything you put out here 🥺

; - ; time for transparency, and a HUGE rant. But first, thank you so much, im so honored you said this to me <3

there are plenty of ways you can support me! For instance, i do have a patreon set up for eventual writing [which will still be posted here too for the most part], that won't happen until i have more time outside of school. I also do have cash app! Which i prefer over ko-fi because i don't like my personal information shown ;-; you can ask me for my cash app tho!

Other ways include simply telling me how my fics make you feel, or if you like them. You are never obligated to tip me money for what I write, and i will alwwwaaays want feedback and reblogs!

that being said: am i leaving tumblr?

I've been weighing my thoughts lately, and i've boiled it down that i really don't know how I feel about being here after I started writing four years ago. I don't like the way people feel entitled to access my life, and who I am. [remember that blog who posted my selfies, and other writer's selfies just so people could see it? without our consent? example number 2398749382, truly]

I don't like the cliques [even if we all end up in one whether intentional or not, some of you are just fucking mean], i don't like the moral police, i don't like the performative activism, i don't like the copying even if on a tiny level, i don't like how people treat me like a celebrity. I don't like how I can't monitor closely for underage people who should not ever be looking at my blog, let alone reading work that i did NOT write for them. the main thing though, really is the entitlement from people, and the blatant nasty intentions a lot of people have here, especially between writers.

It's unbearable sometimes.

Every day, i have to be talked out of deleting both of my blogs and writing elsewhere specifically for the freedom to stop walking on egg shells. Then again, some days, like today, i like it here.

So, while I was recently just waiting to absolutely disappear without a word here, today I feel good. Today, I feel like staying wouldn't be too awful.

I just want to make something clear to people while I'm talking about it. If i stay here, i will never care so deeply about fan fiction, or people's opinions on it outside of feedback on my work. I care about it as a creative process, and a skill to be learned, that's it. I do not care what other people read, i do not care what they write, i don't care who jerks off to what. I will never, fucking ever take fan fiction so seriously that I feel hatred towards another person. unless it involves minors/underage people, of course. that's entirely different for me personally. For the most part, i genuinely only care about what I'm doing and what i can do better.

If i stay, i need people to stop expecting me to be a spokesperson on literally anything and everything. I am a person who is genuinely struggling just to get out of bed. I am a person who is studying and doing home work more than I would be working if I had a full time job right now. I do not have time or energy to care deeply the way others do, and even if I did have that time and energy, i put it on things i love. Like writing my own fics and not giving a fuck about what anyone else is doing.

This blog is my space. It's my world. I'm sick of expectations for me to make it anything more than what it is: a goddamn kpop smut blog.

This website is excruciating to open sometimes. but on days like today, i really appreciate it and love it here.

I will stay for now, but don't be shocked if, in the future, i leave without even saying my goodbyes. I have things outside of this blog that matter to me, and I will never let myself feel unhappy doing something i love, that's more for me than any other person in this world who wants to scream their opinions.

**edit 11/20** and with the AI apocalypse apparently happening here, it really does feel like....bad to be here. i don't want people who don't write to put themselves on the same level as real writers. y'know, the ones who put love and effort into their work. It's very upsetting to see the amount of people who don't care if it's being used.

especially like....knowing those fics get hella interaction because it seems readers, even if they don't know it, seem to value false writing over very real writing. oof. anyway

as long as my writing stays fun and positive, i will be staying.

[alicerosejensen]

Find me

Warning: mention of blood, violence (physical and psychological), mention of viruses, parasites, zombies; kidnapping; the reader has a slight anemia; Fem/reader; established relationship with Leon.

Synopsis: You could have a quiet wedding and a good life with the person you love most in the world. Leon was ready to protect you to the death from his enemies and viruses but… it seems that someone is also interested in you. And the price for life will be very high.

A/N: The idea from this post that I wrote about quite a long time ago. "Together forever" I'm not very good at writing (apparently the Yandere theme is not mine, no matter how much I like it). So I'm going to try this plot. I don't know how many parts there will be, but if everything goes well, then probably a lot (maybe 10-12 or so). I hope someone likes it because I have serious notes on this work in my notebook, as if these are sketches for the 9th part of the resident).

Tags will be added to the following parts. I was very much inspired by the remaster and Haunting ground when I was taking notes. After all, both games were made by Capcom.

Feedback is welcome (but no insults!)

Sometimes the worst horror happens in the name of love. It's not the worst plot for books, films or paintings that are more than a hundred years old and it's impossible not to admit that sometimes we want to be loved until our death.

And maybe after it.

The words sound soft, with a slight taste of regret, as if somewhere between the letters there is a treacherous "I'm sorry". But in fact it was so predictable. Leon hugs you too tightly, experiencing an inexhaustible sense of guilt, because he promised to decide together where you will spend your honeymoon, which is unlikely to last exactly a month, he promised to watch a movie with you that you have been planning for a long time and… and everything went to hell.

Leon nuzzles your cheek and devoutly kisses you gently, leaving a wet trail with his eyes closed. Another sign of his eternal love, his lips are imprinted on the bridge of your nose, making you smile from the slight tickle caused by his stubble. He had no power over not being called to work for at least another week, but the government is not interested in the personal life of his best agent. And yet you enjoy the way he puts his arm around your waist, holding you as tightly as he can.

"Okay, Mr. Kennedy," you joke kindly, inhaling the almost faded scent of his cologne. "I forgive you, once again. Run to save the world" You smile looking into his crystal blue eyes filled with sadness and longing.

"I promise that I will ask the authorities for a good vacation," Leon swears very sensually, continuing to hold you tightly in his hands and look with those puppy eyes from which the soul is torn apart and kisses again this time on the forehead, "If necessary, I will harness Ingrit and no one will bother us. We'll plan everything the way you want, even if it's a tour of all the castles in Europe"

You laugh sincerely, removing the bangs from his face, hoping to stretch the moment of intimacy with him longer. It was so warm and safe next to him that you snuggled up to his chest and he gently cradled you in his arms like a child.

"Don't do anything stupid in my absence"

"I still need to do an exhibition and maybe I'll finally clean up the bookcase," you lie knowing full well that the books will still lie randomly on the shelves and you won't even touch them. Actually, your work was the only thing that could save you from the all-consuming longing for Leon.

"Be careful, okay?" with some hidden fear, he asks, reluctantly releasing you from the ring of embraces. "I'll call as soon as I get a free minute and I'll really be back soon"

Leon is already out on the street and you follow him with a sad look, noticing some dark car to the side. Rightly deciding that they came for him, you lower your head, sighing heavily and literally taken aback when Leon's lips abruptly cover yours with a demanding and somewhat rude kiss that you forget how to breathe. At some point you try to seize the initiative, but strong hands push you against the wall and you hit the back of your head a little painfully, allowing him to dominate. As always.

"I would eat you right here," Leon said sarcastically and quietly stroking your hips, "But I really have to go."

And you silently bite your lower lip while watching him move away from you and get on his bike.

Well, that cool car wasn't for him, but this thought quickly leaves your head and in the end, tired of standing on the street, you just go back into the house, closing the door, grabbing the phone and immediately sending him an impatient "I miss you already." However, this does not prevent you from also ordering food with home delivery and watching some movie to pass the evening that was hopelessly spoiled.

The evening really became disgusting, neither delicious food saved him, nor a good movie will save him.

"Complete shit" a quiet curse came off your lips when you looked at the phone screen for the hundredth time in the evening and endlessly reread Leon's last message "My love…" which seems to have been imbued with such despair that tears came to your eyes. He was like a big kid who couldn't live a day without you and besides, only with you his sleep was like a more or less healthy one. You were his only light and he wanted that light to stay with him forever. Well, you could send him a hundred more messages, but it's unlikely that he will have the opportunity to read them in the next few hours or even days. So with bitterness, you just turned off the TV and went to the bathroom to get ready for an earlier than usual sleep.

Hot water pleasantly calmed and warmed the skin flowing down the body. You spent 15 minutes in the shower, brushing your teeth and doing all the usual and favorite cosmetic procedures, smeared your body with a lotion with a pleasant floral scent, waiting for it to soak into pale skin. The mood even improved a little when you changed into pajamas and straightened the bed once more before putting your head on the pillow and looking at the phone.

Nothing.

There's no point blaming Leon or doubting his love. It wasn't up to him. Sometimes he was dragged out of bed late at night and you could not see him for weeks without even being able to talk on the phone for one minute. But when he returned, he turned into a puppy clinging to his beloved owner and covered your body with a lot of kisses, not letting you get out of bed. Not that you mind… You always miss him and worry about him.

Sighing, you turn over on your side, putting the phone on the bedside table and not seeing the desired message from your fiance. Therefore, grabbing Leon's pillow, the lungs are filled with his smell and instead of feeling his presence, you experience only a deep feeling tearing apart that makes your heart beat a little faster.

And closing your eyes, you reach for the switch, when suddenly for a second the phone quickly notifies you of a new message from the addressee next to whose name the heart turns red.

"Don't forget to take the pills that the doctor prescribed for you. I want this sickly pallor to disappear. Love you"

Well, smiling, you took a screenshot of the message for some reason, saving it in your gallery on your phone. After sending Leon the answer, you still remembered that you really forgot about those pills once again, but you didn't want to get up anymore, so you left this matter for the morning. Sighing once again, trying his luck in the hope that Leon would write something else, your mobile was treacherously silent while you were just flipping through the social media feed.networks thinking only about how dependent you are on this man. However, the same can be said about him. The phone went out, as did the light in the bedroom, and sleep slowly overtook your mind when you hugged else's pillow without hearing quiet footsteps in the next room. The uninvited guest, thanks to Leon, had to tinker a lot with the lock of the front door before he unlocked it, quietly closing it behind him so as not to attract your attention while you were in the shower. Merging with the surrounding darkness, it was necessary to wait for the right time and prepare the syringe so that everything went as it should and the target was quietly neutralized without attracting the attention of neighbors.

The order was well paid and the fact that Leon left the house on that day was only to his advantage. After all, a government agent can ruin everything and getting rid of him threatened big problems that were not needed by anyone, but who will remember about his pretty bride, about whom he will probably quickly forget everything himself? The unknown person only needed to stick a pomeranian, inject the substance and quietly take the target out of the house by throwing a fake note with a handwriting similar to yours that you and Leon do not see the future for yourself. Pick up a few personal items and throw them in the nearest trash as proof of the truthful departure of the unfaithful bride.

Not the worst plan, especially since Leon Kennedy will think about your disappearance and how natural it is, no one really cares. Even if he suspects this ill-conceived plan, by that time you will be too far away from here anyway.

The problem was solved by itself because you are a simple art worker did not pose any threat even if you tried to resist. One step, two… the blessed victim will not suspect anything until the very moment when someone else's hand in a black glove closes her mouth and sticks a needle into her body. You fall asleep without suspecting anything, somehow reflexively reaching to the left side where Leon usually sleeps with his back to the bedroom door.

You are separated by literally a few meters from each other before one inept movement spoils everything.

The sound of falling books that Leon has been asking you to arrange exactly for so long makes you open your eyes by squeezing the pillowcase of the pillow and the "guest" freeze without touching the door handle. However, you felt a gaze on you that did not let you be deceived that someone had entered the house.

In Leon's bedside table there is a 9mm pistol fully loaded. It's not that you were very accurate, but Leon took you to a place as entertainment, where you trained shooting at targets under the watchful eye.

"not the worst result for a beginner," he said condescendingly so as not to upset you, but it was fun even if the gun was real.

Except now there are no jokes! You heard another step towards your side and held your breath, gathering strength for a jerk to pull out the gun and remove it from the safety. From fear, the heart beat faster, causing the blood to roar in your ears and before the intruder's hand landed on your face, you abruptly rolled to the left side of the bed, throwing a pillow at the person standing over you, winning for yourself a couple of seconds from his confusion.

Jumping to your feet, you quickly grabbed the gun pointing it at the man with trembling hands, removing it from the safety.

"Your own life is more expensive," you thought when a man of impressive size in a mask stood a meter away from you without a weapon, because his goal is to deliver you alive because you will not be of any use dead.

You held his floor at gunpoint, but your hands were shaking from the unusual weight and you really wanted to lower them down, but you held on trying not to panic. A step towards you and you pulled the trigger without aiming so stupidly hitting the closet, startled by the loud noise of the shot, immediately shrinking and from unaccustomed frightened by the strong recoil of the weapon.

"Fuck," he swore loudly, immediately rushing to you, forcing you to scream at the top of your voice while miraculously dodging. Rushing to the door, the first thought was to run outside and ask for help from neighbors, especially since the sound of a gunshot and a woman's scream certainly did not go unnoticed and someone probably should have already called the police. We just need to hold out. However, you only managed to jump out into the corridor when suddenly a strong man's hand roughly grabbed you by the hand in which you were holding a gun and your finger pressed the hook again making a shot.

Again a loud noise, your screams and a small hole in the ceiling.

Again the bullet flew by.

"Get off me, you bastard!"

A ringing slap in the face and you abruptly fell to the floor dropping the gun somewhere to the side. He immediately hung over you, but grabbing the first book that came to hand, you threw it in her man's face and taking advantage of another hitch jumped to her feet, running on without thinking about how much lip hurts.

And yet, the chances of escape were initially small, especially when shortness of breath began due to anemia and the chest began to ache sharply. A deep breath did not help even if your body was filled with adrenaline, he still knocked you to the floor, pressing your whole body to the floor, taking that ill-fated syringe out of your pocket and sticking it into you by quickly pressing the plunger . It only takes a few minutes, but because of your screams and shots, even they could put the entire mission under the "failed" icon, so without wasting even these precious minutes, the kidnapper grabs you by the hair and just hits your head on the floor suppressing resistance at the root. The world before your eyes becomes hazy and barely audible when a strange and unusual feeling of lightness covers you despite the pain in your head.

"Bitch ruined everything"

This bastard threw you over his shoulder and quickly ran out of the house, leaving the syringe lying there on the floor because there was no more time. Throwing you carelessly like a sack into the backseat, he slammed the door and gave gas to get away from the crime scene as soon as possible and dump the tail by moving to another car. They'll pay him well anyway.

You only blurred vision being on the verge of consciousness silently watched your loss until a long sleep covered you.

[himbeereule]

Орлёнок Demo Release

Finally, the demo is here! It's not exactly January anymore, but better late than never, right?

You can play it right here!

I also made a post on the CoG forums, if you want to check it out: Link

Features include:

Meeting your family! And getting bullied.

Getting executed!

Rising from the dead!

Celebrating life by slaughtering some rebels!

(Being extremely miserable!)

Feedback:

This is, quite obviously, a work in progress. It is made available so that you, the reader, can give feedback that improves the game.

So, while you can - and should - obviously tell me whatever you want, a specific list of what I need most in terms of feedback can be found here:

Language. English is not my first language (actually, not even my second one), and I mostly read non-fiction academic works when I read in English, so my writing is certainly not at the level it should be. If you have any concrete issues, please tell me, and I'll try to learn how it can be improved.

Spelling. I don't expect much in the way of outright errors, but I do know that I mix up British and American English all the time. The intended style is American English, so please point out spellings that are wrong in that regard.

Inconsistencies. There are a lot of variations between scenes, and I'd like to make the story as immersive as possible; so, if a phrasing, a character's behaviour etc. feel like they don't fit into the choices you previously made, please tell me. In detail, if possible, otherwise I won't be able to amend it.

Sensory descriptions. AuDHD makes my brain process sensations, including visual impressions, very differently, which means I often end up forgetting those exist. Please tell me about scenes that lack description in that regard. (My first grade elementary school report card called my writing 'efficient and devoid of feelings', and I'd very much like to move past that.)

Technical problems. The code should be pretty solid, but with how complicated it is, it'd be weird if there weren't at least some problems. If you find them, please try to include as much detail as possible when telling me about it. (CS Quicktest and Randomtest are not usable due to the complexity of the code, lol.)

You liking the story. I remain thoroughly convinced that I am a worthless person who isn't able to, nor deserves to create anything, and currently my only motivation to continue this project is derived from pure stubbornness. So, if you, for some reason, actually like this demo, please tell me. It won't change my mind about how bad I think it is, but it will force me to continue in order to avoid being even more of a disappointment.

Additions. If I like your idea, I'll probably add it right away; if I'm unsure, I'll do a poll. You can get me to do almost anything if you say you're sad if I don't do it.

Formatting. Although I try to playtest as much as possible, it's not that easy with how many variations there are, and in VS Code it's sometimes hard to see how well or badly readable text passages actually are.

CWs/TWs (v0.0.1):

Graphic violence and gore

Attempted sexual assault (against the player, avoidable, f!MC only; also against an NPC if massacre route is chosen (is dealt with quickly))

Suicide attempt (by the player, avoidable; f!MC only)

Loss of loved ones

Massacre of civilians and/or PoWs (avoidable)

General misery

(please let me know if you think this needs additions)

As of yet unfinished content:

Autistic variations do not exist yet for the latter part of the demo

Only one of three locations for taking a walk available for now

Tooltips are incomplete

Asexual is not available yet, as it requires a lot of additional scene variation text

Special (psychopath) routes are missing from some scenes as they were added late in development

Choices that are locked and marked as (WIP) are unfinished

Interaction routes for Semyon/Selena, Mikhail/Marina and Leon/Leah. They are top priority for the first set of updates

It is recommended that you play this with a stable state of mind. If you choose the suffering paths because it's relatable and/or as a coping strategy, please make sure you have support available and avoid triggering yourself too much.

The whole point of this game (apart from the dress-up part) is that, no matter how bad things get, you shouldn't stop fighting. It's your enemies who deserve destruction, not you.

Please keep in mind that I am both literally insane and pretty reasonable, so: if there is anything you find grossly offensive, don't assume I meant anything bad by it. Just explain to me why you think it shouldn't exist, and if I am convinced, I will amend it.

[nekoannie-chan]

Betrayed heart

Betrayed heart

Title: Betrayed heart.

Fandom: Marvel, Captain America.

Ship: Brock Rumlow X Agent of S.H.I.E.L.D.!Reader.

Word count: 562 words.

Rating: Teen.

Summary: Brock betrayed you.

Major Tags: Betrayal, heartbroken, sad.

Additional tags: This is my entry to @the-slumberparty Navy & Roo’s Sundae Bar with the prompts:

"Flavour: Black cherry."

"Topping: Chocolate syrup & Toasted almonds."

@saiyanprincessswanie

My native language is Spanish so I wanna improve my writing skills in English if you notice any mistakes, please let me know and I will correct them.

I don’t give any permission for my fics to be posted on other platforms or languages (I translate my work myself) or the use of my graphics (my dividers are included in this), I did them exclusively for my fics, please respect my work and don't steal it. There are some people here who make dividers that anyone can use, mine is not this type, please look for the other people. The only exception is the ones I gifted 'cuz now belong to someone else. Please let me know if you find any of my works on a different platform and are not one of my accounts. Reblogs and comments are always welcome.

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Marvel's characters (unfortunately), except for the original characters and the story.

Add yourself to my taglist here.

My other media where I publish:  Ao3, Wattpad, ffnet, TikTok, Instagram, Twitter. 

If you like it, please vote, comment, and give me feedback to improve my skills and reblog.

Tags: @sinceimetyou @unnuevosoltransformalarealidad @navybrat817 @angrythingstarlight @shield-agent78 @charmed-asylum @pandaxnienke @real-fbi @Smokeandnailz @white-wolf1940 @tenaciousperfectionunknown @xoxonotme @bluemusickid @leyannrae @Harrysthiccthighss @Marvelatthisone @caplanbuckybarnes @sapphire-rogers @lizzieolseniskinda @notyourtypicalrose @hallecarey1 @nana1000night @talia-rumlow @writingshae @alexxavicry @azulatodoryuga @daemonslittlebitch @chaoticcollectivenightmare @endlesstwanted @chemtrails-club  @marigoldreamer @whiskeytangofoxtrot555 @Here4thefanfics @theestorm @patzammit @kmc1989 @somegirlfromasgard

You had survived the chaos of what had happened at the Triskelion and had joined the search team to locate any HYDRA members who may have escaped.

“Agent, we've detected a signal nearby,” your superior, Agent May, informed you over the earpiece. “Prepare for the descent.”

You nodded, adjusting your gear and making sure your weapons were ready.

As the helicopter landed, you advanced cautiously through the debris. Suddenly, you heard a sound behind you and turned, pointing your gun. There he was: Brock Rumlow wounded, but not defeated.

“So, I finally found you,” Brock said. “Or maybe you found me.”

“Give it up, Rumlow,” you replied firmly. “This is over for HYDRA.”

Brock held up his hands in a gesture of surrender, but you knew you couldn't trust him. You felt weird, you had flirted in the past even though you never told him your feelings.

The next few days Brock was taken to a secret SHIELD facility for interrogation, you were assigned to his custody. You spent long hours in the interrogation room, trying to get information about HYDRA.

“Why won't you leave me alone?” growled Brock, his eyes locked on yours. “I'm not telling you anything.”

“Because there are people out there who are still in danger,” you replied, keeping your cool. “We need to know what you know.”

One night, you stood alone in the interrogation room, going over your notes. Brock was watching you from the other side of the glass.

“Why do you keep doing this?” he asked suddenly. “You could be anywhere, doing anything “ why here, with me?”

You didn't know what to answer.

One night, while you were in the interrogation room, Brock started talking about his life before HYDRA. He told you about how everything had changed.

“HYDRA gave me a purpose when everything else failed,” he said, his voice sounding full of bitterness. “But now... I don't know.”

“There's always a choice, Brock,” you replied. “You don't have to go down that path.”

“What about you, would you choose to be here if you could be anywhere else?”

“I don't know,” you admitted.

Despite your best efforts, you couldn't help but fall in love with him.

“There's something you need to know,” Brock said “HYDRA isn't finished. There's an operation going on, and you're in danger.”

“Why are you telling me this?”

“Because I don't want you to get hurt. Because... I care about you.”

You decided to trust him. Together, you planned an operation to stop HYDRA.

On the day of the operation, everything went wrong.

“I'm sorry,” he said before disappearing. “I had no choice.”

You woke up in a SHIELD hospital, injured but alive.

“I'm sorry,” Agent May told you one day while visiting you. “We didn't know HYDRA was so infiltrated. But you saved a lot of lives with your information.”

You wondered if you could ever forget if you could ever forgive.

One day, you received a package with no return address. Inside was a letter and a small box. With trembling hands, you opened the letter.

“I'm sorry.

I never meant to hurt you. But I couldn't escape what I am. I hope someday you can forgive me.

B.”

Inside the box was a small pendant in the shape of a skull and crossbones. You held it in your hand.

[goodluckclove]

Hello! I’m an aspiring author and I was wondering how you got people to get invested in your story and characters?

Well first off I'd bet upwards of 30 dollars that you aren't an "aspiring writer". While I'm firmly in the camp that you need to at some point write something to be a writer, I also believe if you've ever made any attempt to write anything you're past the point of "aspiring". You're doing it, man.

Even if it fails? Especially if it fails. Most of my career is failure that's like a third of my job.

If you haven't tried to write anything yet, you can open up your word processor right goddamned now and churn out 500 words of whatever-the-fuck, and then you'll be done with the label of aspiring writer forever.

Rant aside - that's been building up for a while, but no one's referred to themselves in that way to me directly before.

Okay, so my secret to creating stories and characters that people can get invested in. Because I guess at this point I can say that I do that. My secret is going to sound really weird and kind of mean but maybe it can help other writers. Here it is, put simply:

I have a very low awareness of other people's ability to engage with my work, positively or negatively, and because of that I am hardwired to create solely for my own amusement.

Maybe it's because I was writing alone for about ten years. Don't get me wrong - I value the critiques I've gotten from beta readers. I understand the use of beta readers now. And I do love positive feedback. Oh man it's been such a pleasure being able to have people to talk to about writing, just the highlight of my creative life. But if my engagement plummeted and no one spoke to me on this Tumblr ever ever again - which I hope doesn't happen - that wouldn't stop me. I'd be sad for maybe a few days, but ultimately I'd keep posting little snippets and sharing insights on writing and doing exactly what I'm doing now.

I essentially treat my Tumblr like I did my high school WordPress, which I don't think anyone read. I still posted because I found it fun.

People talk about writing for yourself and they debate whether or not it's valid or pick-me trash. I don't get that argument because it's not really - like - optional? In my opinion? It's not the only thing you need to do, but I do believe it's a thing you need to do.

My last book is like 188k words. That's fucking long. I fully believe the reason a majority of positive feedback comes from the fact that I wrote it in full earnestness towards what I liked and wanted to see in a story. I did think of the reader, but mainly to the extent that I would want a writer to think of me as a reason. Which is mainly in creating a literary landscape that's comforting and exciting in a safe way. Because that's what I wanted to do.

I'm a deeply, deeply selfish writer by nature. Sometimes I worry about markets, or trends, or whether anyone would want to read 4-5 asexual epics where like one major plot point happens per book. But then I get distracted by something, usually writing whatever happens next, and I eventually lose interest in thinking about it. And I firmly believe if you commit to the bit to that obsessive extent - I mean, it probably won't get you commercial success. I am the wrong person to talk about gaining commercial success. But with the right marketing tactics it could gain you cult notoriety.

Frankly my whole goal in life is to be a sort of asexual John Waters type. Like just a kindly, strange, vaguely Eldritch queer with ramshackle production capabilities that just end up happening somehow. That's the dream.

[vonpharma]

ok, well, this is kind of ridiculous and sad, but the husband of one of the sicktember mods is now harassing me on my personal blog for giving some pretty lukewarm criticism of the event in the past few years. i have not picked fights with anyone or tried to incite any kind of ire myself, just been professional and upfront with how much it's sucked to fall out of love with my favourite writing event. i sadly deleted the more vitriolic response i got from them, but here is what they left on my post:

again, i cannot stress enough, i have not contacted the mods in any capacity! i have not left any tags on their posts, i have not interacted with them except last year to ask permission for a spinoff blog, all my thoughts & feelings have just been on my personal blog.

in 2022, i filled every prompt for sicktember, totalling at 92 thousand words total. in 2023, i did the same, at 118 thousand words. i adore this event, so much so that i complete it every year despite my busy work schedule. it has always been my absolute favourite--the accessibility of it, the community, the prep time, writing with people who love the fic trope as much as i.

i am not just some rando. i am not just some bad actor, here to incite drama. i am a fan of this event who has been consistently supportive and celebratory, using my large following to both plug said event and rope my many servers and friends into it. in fact, in 2022, my friends and i wrote more fills for our fandom than any other:

that is us. i counted, and only 4 of the fills in the aa tag are by people not in my immediate friend circle.

i love this event enough i have physical books of all our fills:

...and this isn't even all of them, this is just how many i could afford to make at the time. i don't know how to prove that i am a savant for this event, and a passionate supporter. not from day one, as i didn't know of it until 2022... but definitely for the long-haul.

it is really unfortunate that this is the response the fans of this event are getting. in my initial post i talked about how resistant to feedback the event runners are are, but now we are getting full-on attacks if we don't blindly worship every aspect of said event and kiss the event runners' feet.

a word to the wise: when you run an event, it is not so black and white. it is not just two sides, where one is "i am spending time and effort on this thing i love and how to best share it with others, so i do not owe them anything." and the other is "i must bend to the whims of everything my fellows ask!" there is nuance in the middle, where you can keep firm in your ideals, protect your free time, and still listen to what your community is saying. compromise is a wonderful skill to learn.

either way, sending your friends & family to pick fights with the disappointed or barely critical fans of your event on their personal blogs is wretched behaviour regardless. i am not interested in petty internet arguments with people. i am interested in making my feelings known with the hope that maybe something can be changed. whether that be that the mods loosen up to community feedback & try to open a dialogue, or some folks who feel similarly to me take it as inspiration to make their own sickfic-centric prompt event, or nothing happens at all--it doesn't matter.

but this is literally my personal blog. where i post my personal feelings. if you don't like them, ignore them, scroll past them, block me if you must.

i have 3000 words of sicktember prep in another window and wholeheartedly plan to attempt my best to stick to my record of doing every single fill and having a blast. but if another event comes along, and the mods of this one don't intend to change how they interact with their fans, it won't really be a contest where i go from there.

this is not a call for harrassment, please do not act unkind or bother anyone involved here, i'm just sad man. and i figure if people are gonna start attacking more outspoken members of the community, y'all might want their usernames to block.

as always, i will keep on writing for you guys.

[olderthannetfic]

https://www.tumblr.com/olderthannetfic/751011464262860800?source=share

Seeing the numbers compared, I realized that you are right, anon. It's a privilege to be able to write long fics, regardless of them thinking they're unable to write short fics because short fics are mostly scenes so it's not that long fic writers are incapable of writing short stories, deep down, they don't want to. Maybe it feels wrong for them since they've made an impression they always write long fics, maybe they find short fics less impressive, or believe that people won't give the same feedback as when they post something longer.

But I would like to argue that longer doesn't mean it has a plot. I've read 80k words of a character getting tortured with no chance of figuring things out or getting out of that situation and ended quite the same as the start. I've read 25k fic of characters just hogging. These fics have no stakes, no crisis, no buildup, no development, nothing just series of the same scene over and over with different sets or different positions.

Fanfic is free and that is why you encounter things that are, in a way, out of the box and technically are not allowed in the publishing world. But that's the beauty of it. Is it really that big of a gap for people who can write long fics vs people who can only write short fics? Because of how free fanfiction is, most things are okay to do, including only being able to write plotless or short.

One reason why I get jealous of other authors who manage to write longer fics than me is because I was too busy at the time. I found a good system for myself (dedicating a certain time to finish a chapter and then uploading them as I edit and so on) and you can build your own. I think with the right system, anyone can do it.

Pantsers, plotters, and hybrids are equal to me and it's true because how do you know that a person didn't just recycle the same plot they use from their previous fics, thus being able to write different versions of that story? We've seen the viral meme abt fic writers recycling the same thing and a lot of people admit to doing it. Does this mean they're mediocre or bad writers? It's not like that's against the TOS or illegal. Nobody paid us to keep making fresh new ground-breaking stories. The quality of a fanfic is decided from how you treat it. Do you still like it even after five years? Do you think about it sometimes? Do you feel so ashamed you'd rather put it in an anon collection or close your acc completely and orphan it? Do you wish for it gone to the point you delete every trace of it?

It's not from the amount of kudos, hits, or comments, tho yes it is easier to find good ones if you filter by kudos but there are lots of underrated ones and I've DNF a lot of fics that are not to my liking but have high-kudos because people keep rec-ing it. I want underrated fics to be more popular but not because it needs to be popular but because I hope to be in a community with more like-minded people. Fanfic has no publisher, we can't earn from it so traffic is merely informative so it's the community that matters the most.

In fact, to tell you the truth, after 17 years of being in ao3, I've curated my tag very specifically and stopped using the fandom tag and went straight to the ship tag. I also mostly rely on bookmarks, private collections, word from mouth of people I trust or believe to have the same writing style and taste as me. So it was very niche and limited.

Lots of stories have plots but not all must be in your favor so you gotta figure what you like to start. Are you team canon divergence or AU? what trope do you like? Telling someone to stop comparing is ineffective. We always compare because that's how we communicate. But people feel inferior because they don't feel worthy of themselves. If you start to know what you want, it's easier for you to write more. Whether you're still stuck on making 1k-2k, etc, at least you don't waste your time feeling sad or down and you keep writing. That'll help stimulate your brain and you will improve.

(Also maybe just don't listen to authors who you think are humblebragging. Mute or block them if you need to because I know, to some people who are in the same fandom, these types of attitude have more context to it. Idk abt anon, but in some cases maybe they were moots or the account was owned by another fan they've encountered on tumblr or other social media often, a BNF maybe, or just a popular author that other fans praise or talk about often, and things could get personal. Shit can go south quickly in the community tbh)

--

There's definitely an art to condensing one's thoughts into only a few words.

[alexanderlightweight]

*Wednesday is subjective and can last up to 36 hours due to insomnia. Wednesday starts on Wednesday and ends when the author passes out sometime later.

The Rules + Notes

Only Malec prompts accepted

It’s okay to prompt another chapter for an existing fic, even the oneshots. There is a chance i won’t be able to or want to fill it, but i’m always willing to consider. Just be polite.

I write a lot of dark stuff, so feel free to specify if you want to avoid something or want something specific.

I really do enjoy just the fun of building a fic from a single word, but I’m also happy to try and tackle any longer and more complex prompts. 

If your prompt isn’t filled the week it’s sent it, I’m still going to write it. I always respond to an ask to explain why I won’t fill it if I’m not going to.

If I can’t/wont fill a prompt, I’ll post it and explain and say it’s okay to send another.

prompts are only open on writing wednesdays or if i specify otherwise (this was changed because of how many prompts i get easy wednesday and thats the specific prompt day)

feel free to ask me if i've got your prompt but please know it sometimes takes time to get to all of them and I write verses based on the mood I’m in

I don’t post all of my fic fills to ao3 but I do try to do about half of them. Posting takes a lot of spoons and I generally end up adding more to the fics when I post them so it takes a bit.

I want it very clear that I do this because it’s fun and healthy for me and everyone who prompts is super sweet and I don’t do it to get feedback from prompters (but I always enjoy it)! It's really just worth it to me for the expression of shared art. Because I wouldn’t write half of the fun stories I love creating and exploring without the prompts from others to tickle my thoughts.

However, my partner and I are very protective about my mental health and I have social anxiety to the degree that I sometimes still need my handheld after strangers talk to me so I don't go rolling into a blanketball and scream.

If you are rude, I will sic my boyfriend @saeths (who is an asshole) on you and they will happily come down like a blistering gust of burning wind from an out of control wildfire. Seriously, they think it’s fun to fuck with people and they’re very protective. {i have npd and a lack of acceptable targets -saeth}

They would enjoy it, except the part where it made me upset. 

So don’t make me upset and I won’t set saeth on anyone.

Also saeth and i tend to flirt in posts on our blogs back and forth. so if you don’t want to see that because you’re here for fics and want to avoid it the tag is always ‘saeth & kitten’

- Lumine

The Author likes to write

darkly!soft romance

magical realism & magical flora and fauna 

Dead Dove: Do Not Eat (3DNE)

Magnus/Cat/Ragnor friendship 

Exploring the eldritch and angelic natures of nephilim and the fallen divinity of greater demons

Alec’s Institute and shadowhunters being competent 

creature!character fics

soulmates

The Author won't write

non-con/rape

cheating

major character death

hurt no comfort

sad endings

any main pairing besides malec

mpreg/kidfic

camille centric fics

non-magical mundane/shadowhunters inverted au’s

Verse List (under cut)

this eldritch delight – soft-horror malec (Alec is the Trueblood heir, Addams Inspired) 

star eater – sentient!shadow Alec Trueblood au 

the agony of living – chronic!pain alec

Elysiums Tears – Alec is cursed with visions of the future(s)

all your cracks I’ll paint gold – deruned Alec 

the bonds i'd break – all your cracks i'll paint gold au

in his wake, petals fall – Alec loves flowers and Magnus loves indulging him 

cider verse – Alec and Magnus are in a secret relationship since before canon 

pray to the hunters – Alec worships dead shadowhunters instead of Raziel 

the price of lust – Manipulative dark Magnus 

a stolen blade – assassin!alec au soulmates

dressed to kill – mob!wife Alec

flames of triumph – Phoenix Magnus & unicorn Alec 

ripples of magic – Sentient Institute & wards

in the light of the night – Alec hunts circle members to feed the angelic core 

the core of me belongs to you – Alec is the institute 

rituals & souls – Magnus summons an alec for himself after meeting the possibility of him 

to find, to yield – power imbalance, dominion magic

the frost of fury – competent Alec takes no shit in his institute

to break with fate – the circle wins 

all my fears forgotten – alec has amnesia 

like real people do – dragon!alec 

saint & sinners – shadowhunter!magnus & mentor/mentee

hoarfrost kiss on lips aflame – nephilim are more eldritch than mundane and it presents in the most chilling of ways

heartbeat like fire – sentinel!magnus & guide!alec 

spoils of war – Alec is a political hostage disguised as a groom 

devotion across worlds – Alec Trueblood (sentient shadows) is summoned to another universe and mistaken as an angel

marriage of inconvenience – Magnus marries Alec to save him from marrying Clary 

running from my dreams – alec has to work through past trauma when the Institute is poisoned 

walls of adoration, claws of desperation – Magnus and Alec are pre-canon secret relationship. alec is older in this fic, he's 7 years older than izzy and was raised by trueblood grandparents

bleed for desire – Magnus is king of the east coast and happily steps in to take care of newly born vampire Alec 

art of obsession – au of bleed for desire (instead alec ends up falling into Edom and Magnus decides to keep him there for a bit and go on vacation for a bit)  

your heart is full of jewels – alec is mistaken by mundanes as a sugar baby

an extension of you – alec is known as belonging to magnus' and that means something for downworlders

not all that glitters is gold – dragon!magnus with a lot of kink and monsterfucking

for you the world will burn – maryse isn't a good person, but she is a good mother and that is sometimes the more dangerous combinations

finders keepers – alec ends up in another universe and that magnus decides to keep him

feral sweetness, like honeycomb – incompetent shadowhunter and Alec deals with them and Magnus is there watching *its how they meet

soulfire – magnus summons another magnus bane to help him save his soulmate. magnus/alec/magnus

flames so cold they shatter – alec gets the lightwood family gift and remains the lightwood heir... and the only lightwood left

to tremble from your gaze – BDSM verse, dom!magnus and sub!alec

the craft of adoration– alec manipulates his way into magnus' arms

the most fragile of poisons – magnus pretends to be a damsel in distress, aka enjoying overprotective alec

undertow – kelpie!alec au with accidental courtship and BDSM

the treasure of kings – alec and magnus aren't impressed to find that lilith's son takes after his mother (aka wants to bang a lightwood)

the same sky – malec time travel to back a few years before canon, both of them

a warlock's hoard – a/b/o universe, omega/omega malec

to be or knot to be – a/b/o universe, alpha/alpha malec (look it was punny, i couldn't knot use it)

the worth of a life – asmodeus asks for the parabatai bond instead of magnus' magic to save jace

the desecration of souls – lilith has a claim to alec as her son thanks to valentine's experiments

the bonds i'd break – au of 'all your cracks i'll paint gold' where alec takes a chance and steal leaves nephilim/shadowhunter society but keeps his runes

guided by my unchained heart – alec resigns from the institute when jace is made hoti and goes to magnus

the taste of his magic – dragon!alec and magnus (he can shift into a cat) meet because alec can't keep his claws off of magnus' garden

(i'm trying to add some stuff but saeth will come back and fix it!)

[dopepoisonivyoncrack]

Every day I see bg3 art (of all quality and complexity) with dozens of notes in the span of few hrs and hundreds in the next few days while I self-reblog mine like 5 times in a week for like 3 mutuals to see it, and it remains at the end of the barrel. My most popular ones - like 3/10+ died shortly after posting while others keep popping up on my dash with k and k notes. Also I get mostly a like and no rb once a blue moon.

I can't help genuinely asking if people don't see it or just scroll over. What makes me less worth of being shared?

With thoughts or shitposts is even worse.

On discord, I shared some fanart a few times and were ignored. They were seen, because some commented unrelated right after. Then other art was posted and people either immediately responded or even scrolled up to react to every piece and skipped mine. I ended up deleting mine because I never felt more unwanted. No one said anything bad or be mean to me, I am just stepped over like shit on the road. Same with trying to interact on blr.

I may not be some sunshine or people-pleaser and appreciate small trusting circles, but I don't recall being rude or say anything to deserve such collective treatment.

I gained more followers than I lost in this fandom but I never felt more lonely and unwanted or spent so much overthinking what I do wrong. Idk why people follow me if won't interact in any way or don't like what I have to offer. I don't ask money for access to my art, I can't offer prints or merch for legal reasons but idk since when would that make one less deserving of being shared or get feedback anyway. Welcoming community my ass.

I can't keep myself in spaces that make me feel miserable more than bring me any joy, nor spend so much effort on art and things to share for little to nothing. I am grateful for the very few that were kind to me, but I need a break and distancing myself from bg3 spaces. It makes me sad because I still play and love the game, and have thoughts and ideas but I just... idk how to change the experience for better.

[charlotterhea]

I'm thinking about leaving the English Fandom

At least as a writer.

I've just finished posting the translation of one of my longest fics and... Boy, the feedback is depressing. I've planned to start translating the next long thing but I seriously lack any motivation to do so. Yk, translating is exhausting! I already wrote that story once, I went through it several times, and now I am supposed to engage with it yet again only for that sad outcome of verbal engagement I get in return?!

There is a lot I dislike about the German fandom and the way the German archive works, but the comments... the comments!

And currently, ISEM gets translated into Russian and I sometimes take a look at those comments as well and honestly, almost every poorly translated Russian comment excites me more than the majority of the English ones I get.

Why the heck is that? What is wrong with you English folk that you are so notoriously unable to write some decent comments nowadays? I know this has been different! There were authors writing oneshots for the writer of every 1000. comment they got on a story! 1000!!! I didn't even reach 600 for a 70-chapter-long story! WTF?!

I know, I know, I sound very ungrateful right now, but I'm done with being humble and grateful for a bunch of emojis that get thrown my way. I sit at my desk for hours and hours on end, pour my heart onto empty pages, and bring characters and bad-ass-long plots to life - resulting in stories longer than a couple of the HP books combined! -, and a considerable part of what I get in return is some emojis and a generic thank you?! No! I refuse to be grateful for that any longer! There are enough sympathetic posts around trying to encourage readers to at least leave an emoji or a key smash as a comment and yet I have this story that got over 1300 kudos and has more than 500 subscribers and not even the last fucking chapter, not even the finale gets me more than ten comments!

'Oh, but maybe there will be more soon!' you might say but I assure you: No. Most likely there won't because y'all started treating AO3 like fucking Instagram and the likelihood of somebody commenting on a story older than three of four days is LOW! If I don't churn out story after story after chapter after story I just get no feedback at all anymore although I already wrote all that stuff that is right there waiting to be fangirled about!

And the worst thing is: Those old stories are fangirled about! But not in the comments. When did you begin excluding authors? When did you begin seeing us as some bunch of untouchables instead of the dude next door who is just as insane about the same two to ten blorbos as you are? When did you begin to squeal about stories far away from the authors instead of with them in the comments? Y'all are acting like old stories are lava when it comes to comments! The only way I see that old stuff actually still gets read is by the daily kudo mail.

Really, I wish AO3 would turn off kudos. Kudos are such an easy way out of commenting, and all the 'Let me give kudos for each chapter!' posts are a testament to that. Honestly? No! You don't deserve to give kudos for every chapter. You don't deserve to feel like you've sufficiently done your duty by pressing a fucking button! You deserve to be ashamed of reading amazingly crafted stories for fucking free and not even having the decency to cobble some lousy sentences together when you're done consuming!

Oh, you are shy? Well, Brenda, guess what! I was shy about posting that story as well and yet I did so you had a good time after work! Suck it up! Nobody knows who you are anyway! Fuck, log out and write a guest comment if you really have to!

You don't have time? Well, you bloody well did have time to read the 6k+ words I churned out, so stop whinging about the five minutes it takes to write three sentences of gratitude!

You don't know what to say? Honey, you just read 6k+ words and there is not a single thing on your mind to say about it?! There was not a single line you could copy and say something like 'I laughed out loud at that!' or 'You had me in tears about this!' or 'I couldn't believe he fucking said that!'? Then why are you even reading the story?!

Stop those lame excuses and start commenting on fics! Start showing some fucking gratitude for the work writers do just for you to consume it like a bloody Netflix series! We don't get a single penny for the hours we spend in front of a screen! We cannot earn money with fanfiction! We cannot open commissions to get our rent paid! All we get are comments and most of them are a fucking shame considering the amount of work they are supposed to show appreciation for!

So, if in 2024 you still silently consume stories or keep chicken out of writing a couple of cohesive sentences by throwing some heart emojis in the writer's vague direction you deserve to be robbed of the kudos button and to be ashamed of yourself because you're actively supporting the death of fandoms and with that one of the few free sources of joy we still have. One of the few spaces no corporation uses to squeeze some money or data out of us and I cannot believe that this still has to be spelled out. Fandom is a group project and nobody likes the idiots sitting by, contributing nothing, and still getting all of the benefits.

Phew. I needed to get that out of the system. And now I'll go and contemplate translating another story. But after posting this I probably won't get comments anymore anyway because it's always the wrong people who feel addressed by shit like this.

Well, whatever...

[yennefer-of-vengerbergs]

Rant under the cut, just because i need to get this out of my system 😖Feel free to ignore if you want.

I'm tired. I've tried so much to keep a positive attitude about my writing, trying to improve on my own, trying to appreciate what little notes on here and hits on ao3 I got, but I'm so tired of spending so days or weeks writing and editing something only for it to ultimately flop and be ignored. It's why I took a break from it. But then I decided to start writing again, even trying my hand at a longfic. I was so genuinely excited to start writing it and actually finish and post the first chapter for it. I was so damn hopeful that maybe this time, I'd hear something about it from someone. And it just...fizzled out. No comments. Barely any hits. I appreciate the lone like on here and the single bookmark it got on ao3, but I still feel like shit. It's so discouraging to spend time and effort on something, only for it to - as far as I can tell - go ignored. I have no idea what I'm doing wrong here. Is my writing that bad? Am I just posting at the wrong times? I've tried mornings, I've tried afternoons, early evenings, late nights, nothing works, it's always the same, no feedback, no comments, maybe some hits and likes, but other than that, it just feels like I'm throwing these fics into the void. Don't get me wrong, I'm not expecting to be showered in praise for everything I write by everyone who sees it even in passing, I'm perfectly aware that my writing isn't the best out there, but I'd like to think it's not THAT bad. Still, it goes completely ignored most of the times. I can accept that for my oneshots, they weren't as developed, what with them having a named character, with a specific background and people just won't be familiar with whatever went through my mind for them. But that first chapter of my longfic? I was genuinely proud of it. I have so many ideas for that fic that I wanted to share and talk about. I do want to write down all the stuff I came up with for my oc, I want my writing to improve, I want to develop my oc as much as possible and I want a whole lot more for this fic than for it to just be as dead as it is at the moment. I know it's only the first chapter, and that maybe it can still change if I continue to update it, but I can't help but feel discouraged and sad because of how things started off for it (and just how it's always been for my writing). How am I even supposed to improve anything, if nobody comments or gives any feedback? How am I supposed to know if anyone even likes the ideas I have? And how the hell am I supposed to know if it's even worth writing and sharing it in the first place, if I can't even know if anyone is actually reading it? It's bad enough I have an absolutely thankless job where nobody bothers to say something as basic as good job to me, no they just throw more work towards me, but to start to feel that same (or at least similar) way about something that's a hobby? That's supposed to be my moment of escapism? It sucks. It sucks and I hate it and I don't even know what to do anymore. I just know that I don't like this lack of interaction at all and it makes me feel like shit and today was the worst for it (it's genuinely been on my mind all day and even had me tearing up on and off since I saw the lack of notes and barely any hits and the no comments this morning, that's how bad it's gotten). I honestly wish it didn't affect me this much, but it does.

I don't know. Maybe I should just lower my expectations more than they already were. Maybe I should just quit writing altogether. Or at least stop posting and just keep it for myself. In any case, it's a horrible feeling.

😞

[tabbyhoney]

Gorgeous

This story was inspired by "Fear of you" from @sleepwalkersqueen so go check the original out.

Note: Wuhu! Finished Chapter Two and Number Three is already in the making:). A little fun fact I had to rewrite this chapter because for some odd reason, Tumblr posted this and I panicked and had to delete it, it was a sad day. Hope you guys enjoy it and a big thanks for all the positive feedback♥

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Warning:curse words, still not a therapist so things may be more of an artistic choice than helpful, not sure if there are more warnings needed(tell me if I missed something)

Chapter 02

The world was filled with glowing lights and the sound of an excited crowd. The sweat dripped down my skin like the silver tears of a mystical being.

The movements of my body acted like an instinct I always had. My voice was caught by the microphone near my mouth and filled the stuffy room with a sound I remember so clearly.

When I looked to the side for a mere second I could see my best friend feeling exactly what I was feeling. The Ecstasy flooding through our veins pushed us to a performance unlike any other.

The feeling held up as we walked off the stage, my heart pounding in my chest as I tried to have a relatively steady walk.

Sitting down at the makeup table with the biggest smile I had ever seen on my face. My friend still hugged me tightly from the side, rubbing her head against my shoulder.

"That was the most amazingest show we ever did! And your singing Amaya!" Minori chimed happily.

"It really was, still can't believe I was allowed to sing, considering how strict the rules are here" I chuckled.

"I can already see one of those fancy managers seeing you and biting each other's heads off to get ya"

"I won't get my hopes up too high, I like sharing the stage with all of you afterall"

"Oh come now! You deserve more than an underground Burlesque bar to perform in. You have the talent to be more" Minori pulled up a chair beside mine, letting her body fall down on it like a doll.

"Like I said I will not get my hopes up too high, I still have my Psychology studies to focus on"

"I really can't seeya taking care of other peoples problems"

I roll my eyes with a smile before starting to redo my makeup.

I flinched when Minori started yelling suddenly.

"He texted!!!" She yelled and started shaking me violently.

"The big guy?" I ask while holding her in place on her shoulders.

"Yes! He texted, he wants to see me again"

"Just be careful, I don't trust the men coming here, especially not that one, heard he is a big fish in the undergound"

"I am sure it will be fine!" She said in a calm tone giving my shoulder a light tap to calm me.

Even with Minoris reassuring words the uneasiness I felt remained in the back of my head.

-------------------------------------------------------

With a big thud, the door closed behind me, crashing in the locks like thunder. Like usual the room was empty except for a table and a chair placed in the middle, cold and unwelcoming.

With quick steps, I let my bag fall to the ground and sit down on the chair. Placing my coffee mug on it before correcting my posture and clicking my pen.

"Good morning" I greeted happily, eyes looking at the man sitting in front of me.

Still looking half asleep, probably hadn't been too long since they woke him up or perhaps he couldn't sleep. Even if one would think having been here for a year you would get used to the light always being on.

"How has it been?"

"You sound like a robot" he rasped. Chuckling ever so lightly, but this time a lot more tired than usual.

"And you sound half asleep so I guess we both have our issues to work out"

"Nah, have been awake for too long no issue"

"Did something happen?" I ask as my ears perked up in interest.

"Did no one tell the arrogant little princess?" He laughed in the most taunting way I ever heard him laugh "I had another mock execution"

I wrote that down before looking back up to him again.

"Well I am glad you are still here"

"Fuck.you"

"If you feel ready we can continue this or maybe we can talk about the-" I said ignoring his remark.

"Keep wishing I'll tell you anything" he snarled.

My mouth stayed open for a second before closing. Tapping my fingernails against the clipboard, take a deep breath as I try to find the correct words to use.

"Why is it that you still don't trust me? Not even a little bit?" I asked staring into his eyes with genuine interest.

"Aye, I have no reason to trust you. Besides I already have the number two as my lapdog"

"So you trust Endeavour because he proved one time that the conversations are private?"

"At least he proved it, unlike some humans" The way the word human rolled off his tongue sounded like the worst insult ever given to anyone.

"Very well," I say before rummaging through my bag. Taking out a yellow Bento box with some duckling stickers on it.

I opened the box and was met with the smell of rice, chicken, and some nicely cut vegetables.

"It is highly against the rules to give prisoners any kind of nutritious food, with the reasoning that they should not gain strength. I could lose my job for a simple thing like that" I explain already separating some chicken, rice, and a few vegetables on the box lid. "Real funny if you ask me".

I stand up to walk around the table and place the homemade plate in front of him. After that, with a quick motion, I loosened the chains so he would be able to eat for himself.

"It's poisoned," he said looking down with a suspicious eye on the food.

"Trust me it isn't"

"Prove it"

"No thanks"

"Then I won't eat it"

"It isn't poisoned. It wouldn't make sense for me to do so"

"At least one bite of the chicken" he argued.

I could feel the uneasiness creep up my spine.

"I don't eat chicken. My boyfriend made that for me so there shouldn't be any poisonous substances in it"

He stared at me for a moment. If it was because of the chicken or my boyfriend I couldn't tell.

His mouth opened and closed a few times before he was able to find the correct words.

"You have a boyfriend?"

The question didn't surprise me but it still felt rather stupid to even bring this up, on my part. Giving people, especially villains, a weak point is never good.

"Yes, now eat up"

"How? You sound way too arrogant for any man wanting to be near you, let alone fu-"

I stared at him wide-eyed. Feeling rage bubbling up inside of me that I try to suppress. I blinked maybe once, maybe twice before saying the most honest thing I could in that moment.

"First of all fuck you. Second I thought I told you to eat so please do before I decide to practice force-feeding on you"

"Please do" He laughed leaning his head to the side. "Would be my pleasure to bite your finger off"

"I won't do it"

"Hah! Knew you were jus-"

"Because that is one of the worst things I have ever seen done here and I don't want to practice that"

He stayed silent with an unreadable expression. After some time in silence passed he started to slowly eat the food. Very slowly he started chewing on each bite like he would need to leave if he finished too quickly.

I let him finish his food before packing it all away again, leaving his chains loose like I was not scared to be hurt by him.

"Did you have a partner?" I ask while drawing ugly little baby birds on my paper.

"I still have"

I stop mid-drawing to look up to him again. Leaning against the armchair tapping my chin with the pen lightly.

"Can I ask for their name or is that too much?"

He hesitated, that was clear with the way his gaze went to the side and his teeth biting his lip.

"Nitsuki" he mumbled.

I decided to not write that down, in favor of not accidentally sending an entire squad to her doorstep. Afterall she didn't exactly do anything harsh.

"What's your boyfriend's name?" He asked while looking at me with his piercing eyes. He sounded calmer again.

"Riku. What did you like about her?"

"She was calm, always. Couldn't read her for shit"

"That's what you liked about her? That's not the best trait to have if you ask me, sounds like she never cared much"

"I didn't ask you" he spat, clearly offended by how I spoke about her.

"Sorry. How did you two get together?"

"Why does this matter?"

"I am merely curious"

"Aye of course... It wasn't special, just met her and knew I should marry that girl"

"Wait hold on for a second!" I raise my hand in a waiting moment. "How long did you know her for you to decide to marry her?"

"Not long?"

"Are you braindead? You can't marry someone you just met, especially not if you can't even read her at least a little bit"

"Hawks mate for life, there is no undoing of falling in love and it was the right choice"

I didn't buy that, it sounded more like a one-sided thing and I haven't even got a lot of information.

"You may be a mutant but don't forget you are also human"

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean?" He glared at me with rage in his eyes.

"It means exactly what I said. Someone who may be half-hawk doesn't mean they share every single trait. To put it simply, there is no one true mate for you, because that would be a trait for an actual hawk not a human like hawk"

I didn't know what I had expected to happen after my words. But perhaps him jumping at me trying to claw my eyes out with his talons wasn't really on my mind, especially since I was sure he had quirk suppressors and all that important safety stuff.

The only good side of this happening was that he still had chains and they were still too short to reach me...

...Once I moved two steps away from him.

My chair was falling to the cold ground with a loud noise that rang in my ears. My eyes were wide open from the shock, I could feel my body tensing up.

Breath

Now I knew for sure that I pushed his buttons too hard too soon. Even my instinct told me to run call it a day and a success but for some odd reason, I wanted to stay just a little longer.

I decided to sat down on the floor, crossing my legs. I closed my eyes for a second, only breathing and trying to blend out his yelling. Never thought he could become this aggressive.

Even if I wanted to blend out his yelling I still needed to listen to him to calm him.

"You have no fucking clue what it is like to be born a mutant!"

"You are just a dumb fucking bitch who does everything for money!"

"you don't know shit about me or my life!"

-------------------------------------------------------

The scene right in front of me made me sick to my stomach. I didn't even look properly since I only got here but when Endeavour called me and told me about a motel where Shinyo probably was and what happened I couldn't shake the feeling of what I would do if it was true.

My eyes scanned over the crowd of people and the barricades from the police. With small steps, I started walking inside the crime scene, the motel where it happened.

Endeavor was standing at the side talking to policemen. As I walked over to where the body was lying.

Some police officers made sure I knew the rules before allowing me to take a closer look.

I don't think any words would be able to describe the pure horrific, disgusting horror lying in front of me.

No one would blame me for not looking too long.

I turned around on my heel and walked over to Endeavour.

"Endeavour," I said looking up at the big flame hero "Can we talk?"

"Hmph" he puffed and walked with me to the side, steps so heavy it felt and sounded like the floor would break.

"Why am I even here? We both know it wasn't him"

"We know that yes, but he was here I am sure. And since I can't calm the public alone I need someone who worked with him on a different level"

And again it sounded like I didn't had much of a choice

Getting some fresh air after talking and getting into a nice little restaurant was a good idea. Sitting down on a table and being greeted by an...

Abnormally large chef was a good thing happening.

"What can I do for you little lady?" He asked with a gentle smile.

"Oh just something to eat, as long as there is no meat in it everything is fine" I lean back in the chair stretching my arms.

"Of course!" The chef said and disappeared into the kitchen.

Beside me the restaurant was empty. It smelled of various different foods and spices that bundled up into a mouthwatering experience.

"Is it okay if it tastes like meat?" He yelled from the kitchen. What a sweet considered man.

"It is, as long as it isn't chicken" I answer.

When he placed the food in front of me I thanked him nicely before starting to eat the noodle soup he prepared.

The TV was running quietly in the background and I heard him humming while he was cleaning a table.

The soup was delicious. I never was the best at describing food or perhaps it was the strong taste of pork that filled all my predatory senses with delight but this noodle soup was the best thing I ever ate.

"It's really good" I tell him while swallowing a bite.

"Oh thank you! I tried to make it something special, rarely does someone ask for something without meat" he explained happily.

The news had a tendency to replay itself quite often. Hearing them talk about the motel crime and linking it to Shinyo I groaned annoyed.

"Seriously, they can't even listen to people telling them facts"

"Huh? What do you mean by that? This is horrible what happened, especially since he escaped prison..." The chef said in an odd tone of voice. I can hear his heartbeat going up.

"It wasn't Takami. I worked with him for five years in prison and Endeavour agrees"

"Wait what?"

"Believe it or not but that man is actually a pretty decent guy, if we forget about his crimes of course, and general mental problems," I explain while continuing eating "But now I wanna know why you look so pale and sound like you are hiding something".

"Oh uh... It's nothing" He stopped cleaning and looked over at me with an uneasy expression.

"You sure? If he was here I would appreciate it if you told me"

"I can't"

"The threat he gave you will not hold up if you tell him Howashi asked"

"I uh... But my... My son..."

"Trust me"

He tapped his foot nervously on the ground while playing with the towel in his hand. He cleared his throat and nodded.

"Alright... Yes, he was here with his little son. I gave them something to eat and a sewing kit, he had a wound he closed with uh... His son together."

"Did he say where he would wanna go?"

"No, I am sorry I don't know"

"It's fine, thank you very much."

I finish my food and walk up to him to pay.

"Keep the change, as a payment for the food he for sure didn't pay for"

"oh no no no! I gave it to them for his son"

"It's fine, really."

With a last wave goodbye, I left the nice restaurant I plan on visiting more frequently. Pulling out my phone and typing a message for an old friend of mine I haven't talked to in years.

I wonder what dumb thing Shinyo is doing now.

[pyromanicsghost]

I genuinely don't understand why people hate the new season. Spoilers to follow.

To start, the Five and Lila subplot was shit. I won't front - it existing outside of the plot made it easy for me to just act like it didnt happen. Diego and Lila and Five deserved better and it sounds like the actors knew it. But if a bad romance subplot could ruin a whole show, I'd hate a lot more things.

I'm on the fence about Klaus's plot - felt like sidelining him and was questionable. But also a natural part of Klaus's life. Lila had her kids, Allison had Claire, Diego his family, on and on. Klaus's whole life was avoiding being sober and then a huge focus on sobriety. This is his thing. All y'all loved his drugged antics and it gets messy and sad especially when facing it post rock bottom and change.

I see a lot of Ben being unimportant complaints - Ben was always auxilary and a mcguffin there to bond or split the group - Umbrella Ben was a concept, a guilt source, Klaus's conscience, Klaus's id...never a character and dead before the show ever began. Sparrow Ben was literally never part of this family and plot about the family embracing him would have been nice, but him having his own solo quest because he is alone in this world was also fine. Jennifer was a plot device - and in a comic book show about another apocalypse thats not neccessarily a bad thing - especially with a group of dynamic characters I care about on the board.

I see a lot of complaints about the lack of fun villains. What was Sy (I know who was in him but that performance was fun)? Gene and Jean? Those are classic villains that are right up there with the Swedes and the Handler. Hazel & Cha Cha are still standouts but thats not cause these guys sucked.

I see a lot of ending complaints - going from "it was all for nothing" to "it was harmful". If it was harmful for you please be safe and that's a personal decision each time - but also that's media sometimes. It wasn't an irresponisble move like The Magicians or 13 Reasons or other things that just don't consider the audiences needs in order to gain shock value and I don't think they did anything irresponsible with it.

(I am a survivor of unalive attempts, one right after magicians so I get it. And I'm a year sober re: Klaus stuff.)

But, I loved the ending. I don't think it was all for nothing. They saved thier families! They saved everyone! The whole world! Universe! Future and past! Their moms! Hundreds of people who died in their fight to save it, on either side because without the conflict caused by them they're lives were different! I wish the Flash, or Winchesters, or anyone else who keeps ruining lives and causing death and strife sometimes on an apocalypse scale or multiverse timesplit scale had, at literally any point, said "Actually we should value this over my mom/brother/self"...like the scale was apocalyptic. That has a cost. And wow they fixed more than even I hoped. The families? Nice. Hazel and his diner wife are where I got emotional - very nice touch to show everyone.

Why isn't there a kugelblitz? Either the deletion of the timelines and that energy removed the issue Golden Compass style or its a fun comic book show with time assassins and a new element called marigold.. take your pick. It's never been that deep.

The marigolds at the end were probably not thought about as much as anyone on here has. I thought it was just a fun finale goodbye, like getting a bouqet at curtain. I liked that Ben and Lila both had one.

Genuinely confused and had to write to the void and see if I'm alone or crazy. I recommend a lot of people read and watch more media for literacy and stop hoping for plots that are fanservice as they often tank good things and fanfiction and your imagination remain goated, often better, or touch grass and realize the silly fun comic book apocalypse multiverse romp may just be a lil dumb and that's okay...if you read all that I'd love feedback 🩷

And I loved so much more than this stuff! Claire being an actualized young adult and loving her uncle and mom and being a teen? Viktor getting the validation he craved. Diego getting his skills and lust for life back. The fucking cut from baby shark to "He's dying" and so many shots/editing/music choices that highlight the dark comedy this show is.