#I wish we had better refs for them though since I don't have all of them on him

[shinychxndelure]

I've been having way too much fun with these two.

(Thank you @thekunstwollen & @raccoonium for their hair!)

[lefluoritesys]

A while ago, we decided that while we can make the body look more feminine or masculine depending on our preferences, we're going to take it as a separate being, a vessel for all of us to "decorate," rather than an extention of all of us.

Storytime. /ref

We, as any system, struggled with the fact that we all want to look more like ourselves in the inner world. The body never really felt like "ours" to any of us except for 2 people I'm not going to name (since that entire discussion about "why" and "who" is personal). We tried many ways of making it feel "more like us" via clothes, hairstyles, accessories, etc, but it didn't really work. There were also no genuinely helpful resources on how to feel better in the body as a system. Seemed like everybody was having the same struggle, and nobody knew what to do about it. Unless you could cosplay, obviously.

About a year ago, though, I, host, finally decided to dye our hair red and not tell anybody about it. I thought long and hard about it years before we even knew we had DID, then one thing led to another, and our hair was, officially, red. I honestly thought that I'm gonna get scolded for it, and nobody's gonna like it the way I do. 90% of us don't even have red hair in the inner world in the first place. But let me tell you, we looked pretty. Fabulous, even. That shade of red suits the body so much. And when other alters fronted? I saw them look in the mirror, get jumpscared for a second, then look closer at it, and their eyes lit up. They told me we looked adorable, pretty, handsome, beautiful, incredible, fashionable, fabulous.

But, most importantly, nobody said it looked like them. People said it looked like us.

It only then clicked that to semi-sokve our gender dysphoria, we could try to take the body as a separate being that we all collectively "possess." We still wore the clothes we liked, we even somehow got a bra that acted almost like a binder, we still have different clothing styles, accessories, etc. But we know that when we front, our mentality for dressing the body and being in the body is not "I wish that thing looked like me in the inner world" but "I possess this thing, and it's not me, but imma make it have unique attributes that both make it look pretty and feel more like me."

We don't have to have our inner form and inner abilities irl to feel comfortable in the body. We learned to accept it for what it is rather than try to change something that doesn't even really need to be changed. We have way more unique traits that just our appearance, like our hobbies, our accents, our personalities, our interests. The body exists as it is, and it may not allow us to look like ourselves, but it allows us to be ourselves. And that's the most important thing. There will still be days when we wished we could look more like ourselves, and body dysmorphia is not going away any time soon. But we, with our limited resources, with our incapability to drastically change the body or cosplay, with our disabilities, would rather accept it, nurse it, take care of it, and tell it that it's pretty rather than hate it for what it was created. The body didn't ask to be the way it is just as much as we didn't ask to be the way we are. We gotta cut it some slack. It's already been through many horrible things. We survived with it, not in it.

Will it work for every system? No. But it works for ours. /ref /pos

-host

[tellthemeerkatsitsfine]

Taskmaster podcast, episode 170:

Kiell Smith-Bynoe: I’ve noticed that from [John Robins’] demeanour in the studio. He’s just quite calm and chill, and is like, “Oh, this is happening. Yep. Oh, that happened, yeah.” Ed Gamble: I think people are surprised by that, with John. Because John’s persona on his radio show, certainly, is quite angry sometimes. You know, short tempered. He’s very funny when he’s in that sort of angry, sort of desperate state. But I think there’s been a bit of a sea change in his personality in the last year or two. So to watch him be calm, especially during some of these tasks, is quite wonderful to see, as a friend. But also, there’s a little devil on my shoulder going, “I wish he was still in a dark place.” You know, overall, we’re very happy for him.

I like it when people who aren't me say the things that I feel vaguely guilty for thinking because it ignores the fact that comedians are human beings and human happiness is more important than art. But it's okay when people who do know them as human beings say it. Also, John Robins has said it himself, in some detail, in his 2014 stand-up show about how he'd found eternal love and this would unfortunately harm his ability to do good comedy (a point that was proven a few years later, because while I thought This Tornado Loves You was a great show, when the relationship ended a few years later, he did write a much better one and got awards accordingly).

John Robins has been great fun on Taskmaster this season, and there is something very funny about watching him keep it together through what's clearly quite a lot of effort, when a couple of years earlier he'd have just failed to keep it together completely. But yes, Farthing-gate-era Robins will always be a "What could have been?" missed opportunity for Taskmaster, not getting him when he was like that.

Although I have to say, I do think we're being cheated on that a little bit. I've mentioned this before, but Nick Mohammed and Sophie Willan both said on the podcast that Steve and John were very competitive, that there were times when they felt uncomfortable in the studio with how much those two went after each other. I think Joanne said something similar too. I found those comments odd, since we don't really see that on TV. But someone I know who was in the audience at one of the recordings has told me about two different arguments in the studio that got cut from the broadcast (didn't even make outtakes), both cases of John picking fights with Steve over task performance. I think John is being at least a bit of his old angry/argumentative self in the studio this season, as people who were there in person have attested, but for whatever reason it's not making the edit.

I think Ed Gamble's been great throughout this season too, all the podcast episodes have been fun. I especially like his takes on John Robins and Nick Mohammed, as he knows those guys personally and professionally. Also, I loved the time he casually mentioned to Nick Mohammed, when talking about John Robins: "I listen to his radio show with Elis James every week, so I know him... well, better than he thinks I do." I liked that, because that is how I conduct all my friendships as well.

I actually have a lot in common with Ed Gamble. Highly competitive, quite liked John Robins when he was furious all the time, really into Taskmaster, and I also bit someone on the arm in 2007. Though I had a better excuse than he did, she was cross-facing me illegally hard in a wrestling dual on the side where the ref couldn't see. Ed just did it because a man from Lancashire told him to. (He probably didn't. I think they were just pretending. It's okay.)

It's fun that we'll get an hour of John and Ed together on the podcast again next week, unless something extremely unexpected happens. Unless Joanne or Steve has the best episode anyone's ever had, and it turns out that Alex Horne thought it would be funny to save all John's absolute worst tasks until the final episode, in an effort to bring back "furious John" for one last hurrah by having his win ripped away at the last moment.

[leaffiii]

*shows up from the sewers like alligator, with headcanons and 1 drabble in teeth* hello :)

I like to think that Pharaoh man is the old man of this team.

Maybe he was fighting along with other robots in Hard war somewhere far away, was able to survive and run away from government long enough to be considered a legent, waiting for the right moment to rejoin in this lost war again.

Maybe he heard about Silicon city's many attends from other robots to overthrow humans ones again but without any luck and decided to lend his hand there. And so he travels and eventually arrives and joins your terrorist club. Maybe he even seems badass first time we get to his introduction. A legend thought to be long gone, a experienced warrior that can survive in extreme situations, a hard war veteran and ect.

And then hes like "how do you do fellow kids" and the badass points that he has? Long gone.

Expect the "in my time-" and "I've seen better" routine. And don't even try to ask about his past, because you just will be stuck in unskipable cutscene of him telling you all about it, like at least 3 hours, bare minimum. Usually the victim of this "cutscene" is Hard man, because he's to slow to make a getaway in time before Pharaoh starts telling story and to nice to actually walk out if he started it.

Also i just think that solar shot (or whatever Pharaoh uses) is actually one of few things that beats Hard mans defense. Like, dude can be dence as much as he wants but can he stand the plazma with a heat that feels like surface of the sun?

Imagine Snake asking Pharaoh about Hard war, and thinking that now that he has a literal veteran he won't need to steal documents about that ever again and walking out of that same room 12 hours later and be like: i wish that i was stealing documents and failed rather than be stuck in a room with him like this ever again.

Pharaoh is pretty affectionate toward Metal man but in a "grandfather that tells u suck after barely telling that he's proud of you" kinda way. Like "man, Metal you actually not half bad with repair stuff, i dont feel anything wrong with my arm animore. But i still had better, so you have room to improve."

Also Pharaoh sometimes uses slangs in hes speeches, so it leads to situations like this:

Hope you recovered from whatever you had and that you have a great day! Bye *goes back into sewers*

Reaches out of my trashcan and munches on this like a raccoon eating grapes (Had a busy day lol but FINALLY got on my laptop to reply)

Oh my GOD this is such a treat, actually!! I've been having a bit of trouble characterizing him and this is PERFECT for him. Pharaoh being a veteran is such a good idea! It also officially marks him as the oldest of the group. I'm still deciding on what his abilities will be specifically, since I'm trying not to have too much overlap between them lol. Poor Hard Man though, big man has to deal with so much lol

I do imagine Pharaoh and Skull being from the same creator (Some FC version of Dr. Cossack) BUT keep in mind I haven't touched the comics at all, aside from skimming the articles on the Wiki. This is already an AU of sorts anyways, which I'll elaborate on eventually. That being said I think Toad should also have come from the same creator for shits and giggles lmao THAT DOES REMIND ME i gotta finish Pharaoh's ref, hes been legless for so long oops (and I gotta do one for Metal and the last two guys. whoops.) I recovered from my cold a bit ago, I'm doing well now!

[justcourttee]

I love your sibling Jasonette so much!! If you don't mind, could you do Marinette's first meeting with the rest of the Batfam? Also, this is probably a stupid question but are the rest of the sibling Jasonette stories connected?

Not a stupid question at all! I wrote them so that if you read all of them, there are parallels so that they could be connected, but if people didn’t want to read all of them, they could also stand on their own :)

I also NEVER mind writing more sibling Jasonette ;) Hope you enjoy! @moonlitjiminie 

Family Game Night

“What if they don’t like me?”

Jason stopped in his tracks, shaking his head in disappointment.

“Is that even a real question that you’re asking me? I’m honestly offended right now that you would even think they had an option to not like you.”

He dramatically placed his hand over his heart as if her words had fatally wounded him earning a small giggle from the girl. Slinging his arm over her shoulder, she managed to breathe a small sigh of relief as they made their way up the long staircase.

Jason didn’t even bother knocking as he threw open the manor doors, effectively dragging her in with him.

“Master Jason, what a pleasure to see you attend family game night and with a guest in tow, how lovely.”

An older man stood in the foyer, his sly smile warming Marinette to the core instantly. Jason narrowed his eyes playfully at the man, a sly smile of his own tugging at his lips.

“Marinette, let me introduce you to the only sane person in this household. Mr. Alfred Pennyworth. He likes to pretend he’s just a humble butler, but we all know that he secretly runs the whole thing around here.”

Alfred bowed deeply to Marinette to which she could only curtsey in return.

“It’s a pleasure, sir. I am sorry for invading your family time. I was under the impression that my presence was a known factor tonight.” Her narrowed eyes shot to Jason who simply shrugged, his smirk as arrogant as ever.

“Nonsense, a friend of Master Jason is a friend to all. You are by far the most pleasant friend he has brought to this event.”

Marinette almost wanted to ask about the context of his remark, but something in her gut told her she really didn’t want to know.

“Please, follow me to the sitting room. The rest of the family has already arrived.”

They walked in a comfortable silence down the hall, Marinette nerves slightly frayed now knowing that nobody expected her appearance. Alfred pushed open two oak doors, revealing a brightly lit room filled with many laughing faces. When Jason said he had a lot of siblings, Marinette thought two or three. Nothing could have prepared her for this.

“Oh my god, Jason brought home a girl!”

Instantly all sounds in the room paused as many heads turned their attention to where Marinette stood in the doorway. Hesitantly, she raised her hand in greeting, a sheepish smile gracing her face.

“Everyone, this is Marinette, the legendary designer MDC, and my sister. She’s flown all the way from Paris to meet you losers for some reason so be nice.”

Marinette mumbled a quiet hello as a few smiles broke through the room welcoming her. Instantly, a blonde girl jumped up to drag her back to where she was previously sitting, ignoring Jason’s protests.

“You just have to play on my team tonight! Are you any good at Pictionary? I mean I’m not great, but I can say with utmost confidence that I can beat most of the people in this room.”

“That’s not true!” Marinette’s attention was split as one of the men started an argument with her as to who was the better pictionary-ist. She didn’t even notice when Jason had sat beside her, an amused smile tugging at his lips.

“The rude blonde is Stephanie Brown. She’s Timmy boys girlfriend, who would be the dead zombie looking kid over there.”

Marinette’s gaze followed to where Jason pointed, a small giggle escaping at his accurate description. The poor boy looked like he hasn’t gotten a good night's sleep a single day in his life. 

“The rude boy arguing with Stephanie would be Dick. He practically rivals your optimism except his happy go lucky actually disgusts me.”

The man paused from his argument, a horrified expression on his face.

“I like to think my optimism is a blessing.”

That earned a collective groan from the room to which he simply crossed his arms into a pout.

“Anyways, continuing, the redhead is Barbara Gordon-Grayson who unfortunately has trapped herself in the position of Dick’s wife. A tragedy really for such a beautiful woman, I mean she could’ve had me and instead she chose him? The world just isn’t right.”

Another protest came from Dick’s direction as he turned his pout into Barbara’s outstretched arms as her attempt to not laugh failed miserably.

“The one staring you down while trying to pretend he’s not interested at the same time would be your future husband Damian.”

Marinette felt her entire face flush red as she reached back slapping Jason in the stomach as hard as he could.

“Todd, I do not appreciate harassing this young woman. You are beneath her in status and beauty therefore you should not be allowed to get off with this insult to her self so easily.”

Damian stood from his spot, careful not to make eye contact with Marinette as he sped past her toward the room’s only exit. She wanted to call out and ask him to stay, but the pink on his cheeks caused her to pause. He probably was just as embarrassed as her and just needed some time to breathe.

“Jason, that was mean! Look at how flustered you made him!”

Jason simply laughed as he reached over to ruffle her hair.

“Trust me, he never gets ‘flustered’ that was all you.”

For the second time that night, Marinette felt her face flush.

“He’s right you know!” Her eyes turned back to the blonde from earlier who stared her down with a playful expression in her eyes. “Demon spawn definitely has a crush on you.”

The rest of the family took turns picking at her, taking jabs until she was sure there wasn’t one part of her that wasn’t bloodshot red.

“Alright, alright, give the girl some space. We want her to return eventually!”

Marinette smiled gratefully toward the dark-haired man.

“After all, I need to get to know my future daughter-in-law.”

She instantly regretted her friendly gesture as the room exploded once more, smiles and laughter filling the room. Why exactly had she let Jason talk her into this?

“Okay, okay, really though guys. It’s game night! Time to pick team captains.”

Stephanie’s devilish smile sent shivers through Marinette’s spine. It was purely chaotic, reminding her of another blonde that she had left behind.

“I vote Marinette and Jason, the ultimate sibling showdown!” Dick puffed out his chest as his voice mimicked what sounded suspiciously like a wrestling ref that her father loved to watch.

“I’m down, how about you princess?”

Marinette bit her lip as her eyes glanced around the room at their waiting faces. Her eyes caught sight of one brooding face that she couldn’t seem to pass by. He also seemed to be waiting, his eyes nervously glancing from her position to the door as if he might bolt at any moment.

“It’s game on Todd.”

They shook their hands defiantly, both wearing dangerous smirks. Maybe she could salvage her pride tonight; not just hers’ but Damian’s as well. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

“Ladies first.”

Marinette and Jason stood on opposite sides of the room, both watching each other with an intense look that came from their competitive natures. She scanned the eager faces of his family thoughtfully. She had no idea what any of them were good at, but she wanted to maintain appearance for the psych of it.

“Damian.”

Everybody broke out into smirks as they shared knowing looks. She didn’t bother to pay them any mind as the pink-cheeked boy rose to stand with her.

“Wrong move princess, demon spawn hates game night more than he likes to win. My first choice? Stephanie.”

The girl pumped her fist in the air as she joined Jason on his side. Marinette leaned toward where Damian stood, hiding half her face behind her hand.

“Time to strategize, who is my best bet?”

Damian stared at her with a bewildered expression.

“C’mon beau garçon, I need your help if we’re gonna kick Jason’s ass.”

He nodded slowly as if that were a perfectly reasonable excuse to kick into gear.

“Grayson is the leading contender if you wish to win tonight.”

Marinette nodded as she motioned for Dick to join them as well. Jason raised an eyebrow at her as he called over Tim, challenging her to pick from the remaining two.

“Okay Damian, Barbara or Bruce.”

He didn't bother responding as he pointed at his father, leaving the redhead to Jason’s team.

It was five hours of intense games, Alfred keeping score as an unaffiliated third party,( after all, they had all agreed that he was the fairest way to keep the games moving.) They all sat in anticipation while he tallied the scores. She couldn’t seem to calm her nerves as she stared at Jason’s cocky smirk.

Marinette felt a warmth brush by her kneecap. Instantly her head snapped to where a hand rested before her gaze reached back up to his face, a light red dusting across her cheeks. Immediately his hand retracted.

“I’m sorry if that was inappropriate, your knee was just bouncing anxiously from the corner of my eye and it was a slight bother.”

Marinette muttered out a small sorry before they both broke their gaze, the blush evident on both of their cheeks.

“And with a final score of 5-4, the winning team is… Miss Marinette!”

Her whole team jumped from the couch in excitement. Without thinking, she threw her arms around Damian’s neck. Realization crossed her face as she quickly retracted her hug, her entire face as red as could be. God, she hadn’t been this much of a blushing mess since she was thirteen.

They all chatted idly for a few minutes before Jason finally intercepted, insisting he had to get her back to her apartment before it got too late. The whole family waved her goodbye, minus one red-faced teen who instead handed her a small piece of paper as discreetly as he could, ignoring the taunts from his family behind his back.

As they drove back to her apartment, Marinette couldn’t hold her excitement anymore.

“I don’t know why you were warning me so much, I think I’m in love with your family Jason.”

His familiar smirk sat on his face as he turned into the apartment’s lot.

“I told you they were going to love you, and what do you know? I didn’t even have to give Damian your number, you two worked it out on your own. I truly believe they are planning out your wedding right now.”

Marinette shook her head as she reached over the console to hug Jason tightly before stepping out of the car. She wanted to deny accusations of what happened tonight, but she knew it would just fuel his picking.

Besides, even she couldn’t deny that she was excited for the next family game night and if she saw a certain Wayne there, well, that really wouldn’t be so bad.

Permanent Tag List:

@damianette-is-life @ash-amg @rebecarojas07 @heaven428 @long-lost-peace @thequeenofpotatoeunicornss @moongoddesskiana @nach0ava

[colorsofmyseason]

what a magical night (part 2)

Again, my take regarding Arsenal's win against Liverpool on Community Shield.

2nd person POV, but it's actually Hector's.

The idea about Liverpool having five wizards in their team comes from @butteryteenagehideout, so thanks bb 😘 and I'm sorry 😂😂😂

***

When your manager and sort-of-unofficial mentor in magic comes to you and tells you that you have to work the magic by yourself against a team who just won the Premier League this season and has considerably better squad than your team, not to mention five of the most powerful wizards you've ever known, you don't get to say no. You can shake your head, you can tell your manager that he's insane, but in the end you know the whole situation surrounding your team isn't ideal and you just have to work with what you have. Besides, who are you to cause Mikel more headaches than he already has regarding team selection?

"I'll get crushed," you say with a little shrug, "but what else can we do? It's not like we can bend the rules and call Lucas here."

"I think you'll find that you won't get crushed, as long as you can hold them out, besides they won't be allowed to use their full magical force in this condition," is Mikel's reply, and you want to slap him for the confidence in his voice – it's not the right moment to sound so smug like that, for goodness' sake. "Just do as I say and see how it works out."

You seriously doubt it, but after Auba's goal on the 12th minute, you start to believe that your team may actually be able to make it. Liverpool does manage to score an equalizer after you get taken off the field, but seeing the work rate of your team, you just know they won't let something like that happens again, and indeed, they don't.

Your eyes widen when the ref announces that it's going on penalties, and you look at Mikel to find him grinning at you.

"You've planned this, haven't you," you whisper in awe. "You had me simply holding them back, so the game can go on penalties."

"Well, I can't say that penalty shootout is my favorite way to win, but with the squad we have, I need to prepare for all possibilities," Mikel replies, shrugging nonchalantly. "At least during penalties..."

"...they won't be able to affect the game much since the magic working will only be the one under the spot itself, thus giving us the less powerful team a better chance to win. I get it. Genius."

"Thanks, but please remember, this is not a surefire way to win, though I have faith in their shooting ability. And Hec?"

"Yeah?"

"Not everything needs to be about magic, you know."

You look at him questioningly, wishing to know the meaning behind the cryptic words, but Mikel has gone to talk to the remaining players about his plan for the shootout, so you just lean back to your seat, waiting for it to end.

And indeed, your team doesn't disappoint this time.

And when later you feel the weight and the coldness of the metal shield on your hand, feeling the magic coursing inside every curvatures and indentions in it, you promise yourself never, never to doubt Mikel anymore after this.

***

[punkscowardschampions]

Buster & Ava

Buster: What the fuck have I gotta lay the law down for? Ava: Oh, and a howdy to you too Buster: Start talking Buster: Mum is really pissing me off Ava: Welcome to the club Buster: Come on, I ain't got the time or the patience for this off you as well Ava: You ain't my lawyer and I don't want you present Ava: I know my rights Buster: For fuck's sake, someone give me a straight answer Ava: God, fine Ava: but this is NOT how I wanted to do this, let the record show Buster: It's out of your hands, yeah, noted Ava: I've got a new boyfriend and they're not happy Buster: What's that gotta do with me? Ava: I didn't tell you Ava: It's someone you know, alright Buster: Who? Ava: Knew, even, back in the day Ava: Your old friend, James Buster: I know loads of lads called James Buster: It better not be the one I first thought of Ava: Well how would I know Buster: Don't Ava: What do you want me to say? Buster: I don't want to hear another word unless it's you telling me I've got it wrong and it ain't him Ava: Then that's that Buster: What's wrong with you? Ava: Nothing Ava: I met him at Kings, I like him Buster: Bullshit, you're better than this Ava: Better than what, exactly? Buster: A fucking married dad, Ava Ava: He's getting divorced Buster: So you're someone's dirty little secret and then what, exactly, a surrogate mum? Ava: Of course not Buster: Just 'cause he's never had any drive or ambition and his soon to be ex is cracked, that don't mean you've gotta step in on either Ava: You don't know him anymore Buster: You don't know him, it's been like a month, yeah? Ava: and who do you think I am anyway, captain save a hoe? Buster: You tell me Ava: No, you think you know so well, go on Buster: Jesus Christ Buster: You're proper acting your fucking age Buster: Don't get me started on that Ava: It isn't that big of a gap Buster: Not like when Nance tried to get on her teacher no, but is that what you wanna be measured against now? Ava: She's already gone there, try again Buster: Okay, try this, it's really fucking hard raising someone else's kid Buster: I know, I'm doing it Ava: Like you said, it's been like a month Ava: I'm dating him, I'm not raising any children Buster: It doesn't matter, you like him, you'll wanna help him Buster: Then you'll get attached and you'll be stuck Ava: No I will not Ava: and he's not going to introduce people to his kids that easily either, he's not an idiot Buster: I don't care what he is, you're being stupid Buster: End it before you're in up to your neck Ava: How am I? Buster: Come on, you don't need the list Ava: Then I disagree Buster: Go ahead, I'm right Ava: Enjoy that Ava: it changes nothing in my life Buster: You think you're grown now, yeah? Ava: You think you can tell me what to do? Buster: When you're this determined to fuck up, I've clearly got to Ava: Focus on your own family Buster: You're my family Ava: Then trust me Buster: I fucking love you, stop it Ava: I love you all too Buster: You told Nance before you told me, you weren't even gonna tell me, what the hell, Ava? Ava: I was going to Ava: I changed my status and she pounced so I just told her there and then Ava: I was thinking how to put it Buster: He's got you lying already Buster: Keeping important shit from me Ava: It's not like that Ava: I am telling you Buster: I'm gonna kill him Ava: No, you aren't Ava: come on Buster: You come on Ava: He's had a hard enough time, alright Ava: and he's not done anything wrong here Buster: He's not gonna be any good for you after being with her Buster: She's fucked Ava: He is though Ava: she's left her kids, you know Buster: Listen, she ruins everything she touches Ava: He isn't ruined Buster: You can't see it Ava: You literally haven't seen him in ages Buster: I'm not talking about him, I'm talking about her Ava: You weren't trying to help him then, when it all happened Buster: You don't know what I did or didn't do then, alright? Buster: Shut up Ava: Don't tell me to shut up Buster: Fucking hell Ava: Calm down Buster: Don't Ava: If this is the extent of the conversation we're gonna have then yeah, we're both too busy for this Buster: Ava Ava: What? Buster: I'm trying to calm down, alright Ava: Alright Buster: Shit happened back then, I'm not proud of it and I try not to think about it Ava: It's the same for him, and lots of people Ava: I'm sorry if he brings that up for you Buster: Yeah, well that ain't your fault, it ain't even his Buster: I'm sorry Ava: You've reacted as expected Ava: Meaningless death threats aren't nothing compared to mum asking if I'm doing it for attention, soz to you and dad Buster: I just wanna protect you, so does she Ava: Appreciated Buster: She's so shit scared to lose you, any of us, but you know Buster: You especially Ava: Rule number one is don't chase them into the boyfriend's arms, is it not Buster: When has she ever played by any rules but her own? Come on Ava: Well I'm not a baby Buster: You're exactly the fucking same as her, is what you are Ava: Shut up Ava: If I was we'd have no problem Buster: Well, I was gonna say nicer but you've fucked that now Ava: I don't feel like being nice Buster: Fair enough, me either Ava: Oh no, however will we cope without your kind words and ways Buster: Do you love him or what? Ava: I'm the one being stupid and moving too fast, now you wanna marry me off Ava: okay Buster: Do you? Ava: Yes Buster: Alright Ava: Is it? Buster: It won't always be but it'll feel worth it anyway Ava: How is it different with Venus? Buster: Everything is harder with or without that cunt actually around to undermine me Buster: I second guess myself all the time, if I don't love her enough, if I love her too much Buster: I'd die for that kid and I have no idea what I'm even gonna mean to her Ava: Yeah Ava: it's fucked up Buster: Caleb gave everything to Edie and it didn't save her Ava: No Ava: How could they let it happen again Buster: I love Rio more than anything and I still couldn't stop it Ava: It's really messed up Buster: Yeah Ava: Do you think you should give her to her dad Ava: full time Buster: He doesn't want her full time, he barely wants her part time Ava: I just think Ava: that maybe that's because Rio wouldn't give her up Ava: he was going to have her, obviously, that was the plan, when Junior was still around Buster: Plans change and he only wants it his way Ava: okay Ava: do you talk to Caleb? Ava: you should Buster: Yeah 'cause that wouldn't be weird Ava: Act your age Buster: That means not being a selfish cunt, no good is gonna come of me raking over his grief for my own benefit Buster: Oh and while I'm at it, let me slag your daughter off for not listening to me, cheers Ava: He probably would like to talk about it Ava: doubt anyone ever asks him Buster: You talk to him then Buster: Be the best step mum you can be, like Ava: 🙄 Buster: Like you said, everything's fucked Ava: Don't include me in that Buster: You ain't exempt, kid Buster: You wish Ava: Alright, then I'm not and get over it Buster: Act your age Ava: Rich Buster: Yeah, I am Ava: Not yet, boy Buster: Take your jinxes elsewhere Ava: Will do Buster: Good Ava: Can report back now, Judas Buster: Fuck that, I don't do what I'm told either Ava: 😏 Ava: Bullshit, you don't want to admit you failed horribly Buster: Fuck you, that's never happened Ava: Sure, you convinced me Ava: definitely not going to do exactly what I want and planned to Buster: 'Course and 'course not, respectively Ava: But seriously, you can't actually lie to them about this because I won't be Buster: Hilarious, I ain't that cunt and I ain't looking to turn into him today Ava: Well I hope they go back to annoying about whatever they usually do and not me then Ava: you* Buster: Unlikely Ava: Serious question Ava: do you think I should let him talk to them Ava: he offered but is that the worst idea or actually might help Buster: Why not? Buster: He loves you too, yeah? Ava: Yeah Ava: but if dad tries to hit him or something as shaming I swear to God Buster: Mum wouldn't let that happen Buster: She'd kick him out well before he could kick off, she knows every tiny trigger even before he does Ava: Hmm, maybe Ava: you have more faith in her as an impartial ref Ava: but she's not been shouting at you for however long so Buster: 'Cause she don't shout at me, she goes quiet Buster: James can still form a coherent sentence when prompted, can't he? Ava: Well that's unfair Ava: I'll ask her to change her method back Ava: and fuck off Buster: It's a fair question, he was partying really hard last I heard Ava: He went to rehab actually Buster: Leave that out of the introductions and calm down then Ava: Don't tell me to calm down Ava: tah very much Ava: like they just want to meet him Buster: I'm just saying, he offered Buster: If you don't have to do this on your own, why the fuck would you wanna? Ava: You don't get it 'cos your relationship is different Ava: you wouldn't subject someone to this family if you didn't have to Ava: in fact, definitely waiting 'til they've calmed down, I can just imagine the ridiculous things they'd say and nope Buster: Take the support, Ava, Christ's sake Buster: He was married to her, he's handled crazier Ava: Yeah 'cos that's how I want to be Ava: how I wanna treat him Ava: I'm more than capable, thanks Buster: Yeah, really capable of letting someone help you, as evidenced right there, like Ava: I don't need it Buster: Whatever Buster: Maybe he needs to give it Ava: He's mid-divorce, I think he's busy enough Buster: If he loves you, he ain't too busy for you Ava: 🙄 Okay Ava: you can go now Buster: You can think again on trying to tell me what to do Ava: Okay, I'm gonna go then Ava: thank you for your advice etc Buster: Don't ask me what I reckon and then dismiss it Ava: I've taken it on-board Ava: I didn't say I'd do what you said Buster: It'll help show them that you're both serious Buster: They reckon nobody under the age of about 35 has been since they were Ava: Exactly Ava: that's what they don't wanna hear Ava: ever since you shit the bed Ava: they can think it's not serious if they like, fine by me Buster: The sooner they hear whatever the truth is, the sooner they can deal, 'cause they'll have to Ava: I'm not even gonna be here this time next year Ava: they need to deal with that first Buster: You're not a baby, it's all part of the same issue Ava: You need to move here or they need to be there so they can be all over your kids Buster: I've already got a place there and they've got one here Ava: I'm talking permanently, like Ava: or they'll have their own baby or something Buster: No they won't Ava: If Ro can Ava: wonders never cease Buster: Yeah and that was such a good idea Ava: She wouldn't know one if it called itself 0 cals Buster: Like you said, in a year you'll be at uni wherever the fuck you want Ava: I'll suggest knitting and golf then Buster: If you've got a death wish Ava: Can't dampen the mood any harder Buster: Come on Buster: I'll have another kid or something, take the heat off Ava: Tah Ava: no chance Nance will so you have to really Buster: Don't Ava: What? Buster: Imagining her as a mother is such a headfuck Ava: She won't Ava: she's heartbroken rn, apparently Buster: Standard then, yeah? Ava: obviously Ava: standard she managed to get that in to this convo, like Buster: If anyone can Ava: you know Ava: as well as a meaningless offer of a trip out there Buster: And you still told her before me Buster: Fuck you Ava: Got to be faster on the socials Ava: I technically told Grace ages ago if you want to be really upset Buster: What? Ava: Not literally the whole debacle, I'm not mental Ava: just to talk about it, when you last came over Buster: What do you reckon all your friends are gonna say? Ava: I dunno Ava: a mixed bag, no doubt Buster: I can like actually try and talk to mum and dad if you want Ava: If you wanna smash your head against that particular brickwall Ava: you're welcome to try Ava: I don't mind Buster: 'Course that wouldn't actually hurt me so Ava: Thick skull Ava: sure Buster: Yeah Buster: And loads of practice at exactly that pursuit Ava: Cheers then Ava: enjoy the brain damage Buster: Will do

[punkscowardschampions]

Nancy & Rio

Nancy: Not to be weird, because I obviously don't mind if so, but are you wearing my clothes in your latest insta pics or have I lost my mind? Rio: Oh my God, sorry! Shoulda said before putting that up Rio: casual single white female situation Rio: I was in London and I had to stop by yours to avoid a real walk of shame... whole 'nother story, assumed it'd be alright 'cos you know, you weren't using 'em? Shipped back fully dry cleaned, swear down Rio: Not to drop him in it but shamelessly will, Buster said it'd probably be alright too lol Nancy: Well we have the brunette and redhead thing going on, already. Just don't murder me like Nancy: It's more than okay. They look great on you and they are just sitting there Nancy: Keep them if you want Nancy: I'd rather you than one of Buster's 'guests' Nancy: Did you talk to him? Rio: Last time I check, no feelings of murderous jealousy towards you Rio: Even if you do have a killer clothes collection Rio: You're too sweet! I'm nowhere near statuesque enough to rock it for serious but it was fun playing dressup, not gonna lie Rio: A little bit, yeah, as much as you can with him Rio: Has he reached out to you yet? Nancy: We should go shopping then. I'm not flooded with other offers or compliments right now Nancy: He did try but I didn't answer the call. I didn't know what to say, you know Nancy: Do I want to know what he said about me, if anything? Rio: Absolutely, always up for a style update Rio: and I promise to stay away for the red box dye Rio: Rihanna 2010 I ain't Rio: That's fair, I remember he mentioned that too Rio: He said a lot of things, some of 'em stupid which don't bear repeating but I could tell he was worried about you, checking you were okay, like Nancy: Oh god Nancy: I should've answered I just couldn't Nancy: I've already broken my own heart there's no handling if he decided to do it for me too Nancy: It was like I already hear what he was going to say Rio: No one is judgding you for not Rio: He's been guility of being unavailable for less Rio: You're more than entitled to take your time with this Rio: Let him cool down too, I put him right where I could but Rio: He's stubborn Nancy: And he thinks I'm as cringey as everyone at school does, right? Nancy: I knew it Nancy: I can't blame him really Rio: But that's nothing you don't know, you feel the embarrassment, I don't get why people think they're being clever pointing out as if its not your first hand experience Rio: He asked if you were coming back Rio: which he clearly wants, even if he's not gonna outright say that Nancy: I thought he might be on my side since he always goes after what he wants Nancy: Maybe he is though, if he does want me home Rio: Yeah, there's definitely hypocrisy otherwise Rio: I'm not gonna commit him to either side from a conversation relayed but I don't think talking to him soon will make it any worse Rio: Hoping he said all the dumb shit he needed to me instead, like Nancy: Was he such a prick to you? I'm sorry Nancy: I can't go back until those girls are far away at uni Nancy: Do you think we could convince him to come here? Team effort to get a visit? Rio: Not all bad Rio: and nothing I can't handle Rio: Yeah, reckon I might've met some of them last night Rio: and I feel you Rio: Worth a shot, I threw it out there that maybe if he came it'd make your 'rents coming less of a shitshow Rio: try and hold him to it Nancy: The ringleader is Chloe, with an accent over the e. You'd remember her if you did Nancy: It wouldn't surprise me if she was still hanging around him and his friends, she always did fancy him Nancy: Okay. I'll try Rio: Oh my God, her?! Rio: If she gave me daggers any harder I woulda been bleeding Rio: Such an unlikely candidate, no offence Chlo hun but total Rio: always the girls with the least going for them, honestly Nancy: That's her specialty Nancy: What's it say about me that I used to think we were actually friends once Rio: She looks like she can play nice when she wants to Rio: with your Brother, like you said Rio: Ugh Nancy: Yeah. She didn't want to play nice after I came out but she did a convincing enough job before Rio: Bet she thought you were in love with her and everything? Rio: What a cliche mean girl Nancy: Oh she went one better and told everyone I made a move of her, which even I wouldn't Rio: Oh, don't flatter yourself Rio: What a cow! Yeah, she's not changed at all then, obviously I avoided her best I could but she was way too happy about my drama Nancy: Like I know what I did with Sian was bad but Nancy: Please, I do have some standards Nancy: What happened with you? I didn't even ask. What a cow I am Rio: Yeah, she's not a catch, whatever way you're swinging, sorry to be a bitch but you were first gurl and that's always gonna be a turn-off Rio: Oh nah, nothing major, well, it was very dramatic but over it whilst it was happening so I'm not bothered Rio: Curtis went with me and then decided to get all huffy and try and make me leave early 'cos I was 'dancing too sexy' or whatever Rio: when I wouldn't he literally left me there, considering he drove us over, he had the hotel key Rio: Cue mad rush trying to find a place to crash and a way back Rio: Safe to say he's chucked Nancy: Oh my god! There's no words for how out of order that is. What an utter prick! Nancy: Buster better have offered you my bed Nancy: I'll kill him if he never Rio: Oh yeah, he did Rio: Offered to pay the way back but I thought that was too far Rio: Between taking your bed and clothes, like, need to at least try and sort half of it myself, like! Nancy: At least he's not a total prick himself ALL the time Nancy: Remembering some of how he was raised now Nancy: Are you in London rn still? Rio: Yeah, I'd say we can give him that Rio: Will go to his head but what you gonna do Rio: I am Rio: Toying with staying for a bit but I'll defs get in more shit for doing that for going with Curtis in the first place so Rio: Should probs get the soonest flight back now Nancy: My bed and wardrobe are yours if you are staying Nancy: Did you see my mum and dad? Nancy: While we're mentioning being in lots of shit, like Rio: I appreciate it, Nance Rio: I did my best to avoid then, and succeeded, thankfully, not really the vibe I'm looking to give out to the olders like Rio: Buster didn't seem keen to talk to them either, so they may very well be on the warpath towards Dubo and you...Soz to confirm Nancy: Care to teach me some of your ways before they end my life? I'd REALLY appreciate it tbh Nancy: Fantastic. That sounds accurate Rio: Umm, get them drunk and they'll be sleeping as you sneak about like Anne Frank? Rio: ORRRRR, whilst they're mid-air, come back to London, ha Nancy: Get mum REALLY angry Nancy: Nice subtle nod to my gayness with the Anne Frank ref though Nancy: And you're definitely onto something with getting dad a drink Rio: Say you're coming to rescue me, I can be FAR more dramatic about this breakup than I'm really feeling Rio: edge of fucking tower bridge like Rio: of course, all bisexuals are upheld in the highest esteem in my household Rio: especially brave little jewish girls Nancy: Good plan, if I can be this dramatic about a non-break up then we can make this believable I'm sure Nancy: Take the heroics from my brother too, always great Nancy: I see the bed and clothes gesture and I raise you Rio: Everyone loves a bit of sibling rivalry put to use Rio: get us both off the hook in one fell swoop Rio: Only flaw in the plan is Chloe with the accent Rio: Going to have to work on that so she's outta the way by the time you get here Nancy: I'd suggest taking her to the bridge and pushing her off but I don't need to go to prison Rio: If you thought the gay jokes were bad now Nancy: Exactly Nancy: And nobody needs a rebound that badly, least of all me Rio: They say some people go to Prison for the roof over their head and three meals a day Rio: wonder if anyone has ever gone in purely for the pussay Nancy: As a vegetarian I feel I'd have to Nancy: If only casual sex was my thing. Wouldn't have got here Rio: Yeah, it ain't for everyone Rio: at least you didn't get to fuck her, THEN catch feelings Rio: that'd be even shittier like and what happens to so many girls in our year when they do the 'casual' thing Rio: no wonder they're being salty little bitches about it Nancy: But that way it wouldn't have been all in my head Nancy: Maybe they have a point, I don't know Rio: It wouldn't make this bit any easier Rio: the actual heartbreak shit Rio: the people being cunts, less so Rio: but they'll find any reason, someone else will be the target next week, like Nancy: I know you're right Nancy: And I don't want her life ruined so Rio: Yeah, but you gotta think about you and your life too Rio: She's fine Nancy: Don't rub it in, please Nancy: I feel like my life's over Rio: I know sweets Rio: but it ain't Rio: you'll just keep going Nancy: I know I will, but I don't want to. Like I know she couldn't love me but I still want her too Nancy: It hurts Rio: Its going to Rio: for a while yet Rio: revel in it Rio: how unfair it feels Rio: 'cos its not a sexuality thing, if you were straight or she was gay or whatever the fuck, when you feel like you love someone and they just don't back Rio: that's gonna hurt regardless of the how you got there Rio: its not just because she was a teacher, everyone's been there, like Rio: Promise Nancy: I wish everyone saw this how you do Nancy: You're the best Nancy: June too but he doesn't get this bit yet Nancy: Though he can appreciate the wonders this will do for my art Rio: Gotta suffer, might as well get paid for it Rio: or A's Rio: at the very least Rio: I don't know, Junior is so guarded, I wonder if he ever will, not that I wish that bit on him but you've gotta go through it so its better to get it over with really Nancy: Especially because my Irish grades are gonna take a dive Nancy: I think he will Nancy: He just needs the right one to fall for Nancy: I appreciate how that sounds coming from me rn but Rio: Oh the awkwardness of that first lesson back is gonna be Rio: I'll deffo come Home by then Rio: I hope so, I know he's not happy hiding who he is, so I don't think he's content being alone forever, like, either Nancy: Oh god please do. I'll need all the help I can get Nancy: He won't be. He's a catch. I keep telling him Rio: Pretty sure push it any harder and I'm being dragged back by my hair lmao Rio: Totally, he just needs to get a lil confidence Rio: Not a complete personality change but just enough to give him that push Nancy: We're working on it Rio: Yay! Shame we can't be real speedy about it, get him getting a man to distract all the attention from you like Nancy: That's okay I wouldn't wish it on him Nancy: I can handle it. Sort of Rio: Yeah you can Rio: You've got this Nancy: So our brother keeps saying. But he makes it we because he's everything Nancy: *your Rio: Y'all are cuties Nancy: If you could use your influence on my brother to make him bearable I'll be your best friend Rio: I definitely cannot make promises there Rio: He goes out of his way to be un Rio: but he's alright really, I think lol Nancy: I'll have to take your word on that Nancy: Until I talk to him myself Rio: Let me know how it all works out like Nancy: Definitely