#I went and looked through the blog cause I was real curious

[foxgirlmoth]

Imagine being one of the most well known trans streamers (at least that I've ever heard), being allowed to afford for pretty much whatever affirming care you want, and then making fun of another trans women for.... Being a trans woman. And then you throw a hissy fit when people say you're shitty for that. Like damn you have so many people going to bat for you for being a piece of shit to someone else in your own community, you can afford to do this, and then you just say you're not 'quirky' enough to fit in with us. You're just being an asshole. Trying to say 'normal' trans women don't exist is pretty fucking disgusting.

[jlf23tumble]

Hiii hope you won’t mind this ask! I just found your blog and i’ve gone over it a bit and I saw you talking about h and l not being together and it made me curious about your larry thoughts!! You can answer in the tags if you don’t want to start discourse but I hope you do answer:((!

I don’t know if you think they’ve been together in the past/never together or just don’t care about it cause scrolling through Tumblr is a nightmare and I can’t see all your posts obviously ahaha but personally I thought they were together and I think they might have broken up in the last year or so. I got a strong sixth sense in general if you could call it that and lately I can sense something is different and I can see some people feel the same but don’t really discuss it openly so I wanted to hear your opinion.

The last thing that made me ‘sure’ they were still a thing while looking at the previous 12 years was harryween with hopelessly devoted to you and then Louis quoting it at his grease fav. After that I can’t really see something that makes me think “at that point they must have been together cause otherwise it wouldn’t make sense”. And paired it up with louis in particular being a bit strange in the last few months and with what you pointed out as well namely Harry doing everything he can to not be even thought to be on tour with L… As I said I don’t know when you started talking about a break up, but do you think that halloween’s occurance was still them being together or teasing each other from a distance or maybe just keeping larries at bay? And would you mind telling me then when you think their situation changed and what you think now? Sorry it’s so longggg and thank you if you take time to answer me <3

Helllllllo, I never mind any kind of ask! Granted, sometimes I might not answer but only because I'm overwhelmed, or it's the same ask in a row, or I'm not loving a sentence, or I just don't feel like it, or I think a bathroom shot is more appropriate, lmao, but this one? I got all the time in the world for you…so much so that I'll put it under the cut, since the ask is long enough itself, as shall the answer be!

Welcome to this mess, and wow, I'm so bowled over you even tried to scroll, I know trying to search tumblr.biz is a loser's lover's game, even for the loser lover who wrote it, so I won't even bother, but we can start fresh!

So my thoughts: Hell yeah, I think these two were together back in the day, probably almost immediately (see: the entire x-factor scandale with the blinds about all the fucking, the stairs interviews, ALL OF IT, screammmm). I don't know how long or even IF they were strictly monogamous, they were in a pressure cooker situation of near-constant contact with each other for five years, but I do think it eventually morphed into something open and/or then into a messy on again/off again situationship. That’s my current stance today, in fact—c'est messy!!!!

I’ll do the usual caveat that none of us actually KNOWS them, though, or what went down, we're only looking at what we see (and hear) and making a wild guess, and yet! Plenty of people see (and hear) the same thing and opt for a crazy reach with their whole chest, all to justify something happening between teenagers 13 years ago as if NOTHING would or could have changed since then. And some of those reaches make literally no sense, or they wash away anything that gets too close to that third rail of cognitive dissonance, the proverbial fingers in ears, lalalalala. I saw it recently on a post I made about clingy Harry with a stranger on the drunk WeHo trolley, with someone in the tags going, wait, I’ve never seen this! Of course you haven’t, that’s what an echo chamber does, bb!

Personally, I don't get that mindset—what’s so wrong about learning life is tough and things change for two literal strangers? Sure, we all love love and want the best for them, but shit happens in real life, too. Maybe it's easier to latch onto made-up receipts or straight up call a blue a green, but I think a big aspect of it is also the need to be right, to show you aren’t crazy, it’s real, and that gets frequently mixed in as being “supportive,” like you're some kind of homophobe if these two break up, as if two men fucking two other men somehow isn't worthy of your “support." But I’m here to say those two things actually can exist, something can be true in the past and not be true today, and it doesn’t negate the past bit, shocking, right?

Anyway, I digress. I feel like your sixth sense is on the money, and I'd love to hear more about it, either message me here or dm me about what tips you into that direction (hey!) because I feel like there is SO MUCH THAT DOES, yet few people really get into it. To me, it’s just a lot of content, so much content, the bare minimum being lyrics in multiple songs across a shit ton of albums, both solo and the very last 1D one. At this point, to me, Larry “proofs” sound insane (he wore green pants, they're MARRIED!!!!!), and part of me is like, kudos to you, Mr. Tomlinson, jesus loves you more than you will know, etc. Even that Harryween outfit of which you speak feels like a reach of a reach, a callback of a reach, mostly because it’s also not that deep, Grease isn't some tiny film nobody's seen, it's actually a remarkably easy group costume, AND it references things that could be nostalgic to two sets of people (larries and larry). I actually feel like these two at this point are either a) signaling to each other in some kinda way, like that monitor edgeplay shit they used to do (which works if you're together or apart, I might add), or b) cashing in some of that green blue green, if you feel me. And again, both of those could be true at once, they don't cancel each other out. I have two hands, I can hold a lotta thoughts!

It’s at this point where I start bangin’ the drum for garries because gaylors have it dead easy—you can be a gaylor and think that kaylor was a thing, but it doesn’t mean it’s STILL a thing to you, so whither garries!? I just don’t think a lot of today’s larries do themselves any favors by doubling down and driving out anyone who has questions. For the big ones, there’s no room for even whispering, hey, yeah, they were together, but they might have broken up, maybe??? It’s, like, NO!!! They’re mawwwwwwied, #husbands, they’ve only fucked one person, each other, let’s jump through a hoop that says Louis wearing green sweats is so LOUD (I’m not listening to lyrics, though, lalalalalala)!! It’s tragic and frankly dumb, but if you want to wallow in the persecution complex of it all, “everybody hates us ☹ (including Louis),” I guess the option is there, the whole us vs. them of it all that I’m just personally not into.

But I do feel like there’s some hope, it’s nice to see people coming around to the idea that, yeah, they WERE together and maybe they aren’t anymore, but it’s okay, it’s not the end of the world! It wasn’t all sunshine and rainbows, maybe they’ll reunite someday, or maybe it’s a goddamned hot mess, but you know what? Not my circus, not my monkeys! Granted, that part is harder for people who are mutuals with those who will not tolerate doubts even for a second—I just hope they venture off and find the other chill people, u know, the ones a lot of larries wish they saw on their dashes instead of hand-wringers, uh oh, oops, reaping = sowing.

I’m sorry, I’m ramblin’ here, let’s get back to your questions at the end of your ask! Do I think Harryween was them together or teasing each other or keeping larries at bay? Hmmmm, maybe a secret fourth thing: easy costume, easy global reference, and it’s not gonna keep larries at bay, lmao. Idk, man, for all we know (which, again, is literally nothing, nobody’s getting 24/7 content for 5 years straight anymore, such a bitter pill to swallow), maybe Grease is a fave movie of someone who’s in the new band, maybe Harry’s got a close personal friend who’s into it, too, maybe Louis's not the only guy in the world Harry’s dated who’s obsessed with Danny Zuko.

As for when do I think their situation changed, I think Eleanor was a big clue, breakup no. 1 was probably around their own breakup no. 1, she was an amazing proxy in so many ways, but I’m sure there were rifts and spats along the way (it even seeped into interviews that get written off as cute funsies or else are outright ignored because nobody watches beyond the gif format). I follow at least one person who talks about the '15 promo tour as giving very recent breakup energy, yet still has some fwb vibes, which means it's AWKWARD in spots, and I can see that. It would also explain why they were suddenly able to "sit together,” lol. Anyway, yes, that breakup (both times) was a big sign, I think no more peace ring was a HUGE sign, I think the writeups by Rob Sheffield (both of them, actually), especially the last paragraph of the Fine Line cover story was a NEON sign, and I think the last four albums by both of them spell it out, underline it, bold it, AND italicize it super clearly, but those are just the easy pickings (see also: Harry biking around daily to prove he’s not in Poland, Greece, etc., and the response is always, “We don’t know what day this was,” lmao).

What I think now is up above! I think it’s messy! Complicated! They aren’t #married! Now is that a forever thing? Who’s to say, and more importantly, who’s to really care on a “does this impacts my daily life in some kind of financial or spiritual way,” see further: circus, monkeys. I get that it’s easy to say, I interact with a lot of other people who don’t care and won't ostracize me for being a doubting Susan with my ~controversial thoughts and UOs. But there are those with faith in the future, so maybe it is as it was…hehe, oh me. I amuse myself, at least. Sorry this is an epic reply, and that it’s days late, I hope it gives you what you wanted to know! Anyone sending me garbage will get a bathroom response, peace and love.

[becauseweknewthem]

Oh wow I can finally say this with confidence.

Approximately 5 years ago I made a post about types of guns, where I intentionally, massively simplified down some descriptions, somewhat facetiously, got a couple small details wrong in doing so, and that post went crazy. Like. Prompted the second highest number of threatening messages I received.

(And I got a lot of death threats on this account.) (I’m curious how long before I start getting them again.)

But anyway, that post. At first I responded to people in fairly respectful ways. I had made a mistake, which happens, so I reblogged with the correction. It barely got seen, but such is the way of this website.

Then I started to think things were weird. It just kept getting messages. And so did everything else I’d ever said about their precious pew-pews. To an alarming level. And it wasn’t reblogs with comments, which would make sense as a thing prompting more reactions. It was replies, almost always from accounts that rarely or never posted anything. Just blank accounts replying to posts with whiny bitching because they’re 2A zealots, so they’re react like the worst kind of comic book fan showing up to go “well ackshully” because you cited the wrong model iron man suit for him fighting a villain.

Eventually I froze this blog for separate reasons. I reactivated recently, and that post was in my head. Not as a “oh gosh, oh no it’ll start again!” Because; whatever, I can just keep blocking folks from that corner of the website. But because I knew that kind of thing would happen again, except now I expect it to be maga flavored that causes me the most trouble.

Y’all. This got reactivated less than a week ago. I have posted nothing about guns. I got a reply on that post a few minutes again. So I can now say, with high confidence, that the wackadoos really do scroll through tags, looking to complain, trying to start a fight.

They are that desperate to score a point. They’re also too scared to reblog or make it a real conversation. It’s the drive by shooting of anti-behavior.

Here we go again, and bring it the fuck on.

[rollercoasterwords]

Hi! I found your blog through the female rage substack article that you posted and I’m curious about a couple things (so I hope the tone of this ask will read as genuine/non-confrontational etc).

I really liked the article and the anti-gender essentialist content, so I looked through the others and eventually found your jegulus article (which I read and also liked) but I was sort of surprised to see that you are a part of the hp/marauders fandom. For me personally, everything related to that franchise has just been tainted since the whole jkr terf debacle really took off. I was big on hp when I was younger and wolfstar is a ship/dynamic that I enjoyed back then, so I’d probably like your stuff if I were to read it. But I decided some time ago to give any and all hp content the chop, because to me it didn’t feel right to engage with it anymore. So I was just wondering how you feel in that regard, if you don’t mind sharing. I don’t have anyone in my internet content circle that still actively posts about hp and if irl friends still enjoy it then it’s not something we talk about, so I’d just like to know how you juggle the ‘two sides’ in that sense of your trans-positive/anti-essentialist beliefs and fandom content that’s still so intrinsically connected to jkr and her politics. (Also, sorry if you’ve answered a question like this before. I scrolled through your blog a bit, but if yes then not far enough.)

Anyway, hope you’re well and I’ll probably keep an eye out for any future essays on your substack even if I don’t follow you on here. cheers! (and thanks for the “playing the whore” book rec, I’ll be looking into that. a rec from my end would be paul b. preciado's "can the monster speak". it's the written version of a speech he tried to give at a Freudian psychoanalysis conference about the position trans people occupy in psychoanalysis before being booed off stage. it was short and pretty intriguing, in case you're interested/haven't heard of it yet.)

hi! happy 2 hear u enjoyed the female rage essay--i wasn't expecting it to spread as much as it did + had to turn off reblogs for my own peace of mind 2 keep terfs away from my blog, but it's nice to know there are still people getting something out of it. also appreciate the book rec--that definitely sounds up my alley + i'm excited to check it out!

and i'll do my best to answer your question about hp, but i'm gonna put it under a cut because i know this is a contentious topic + i have a feeling my answer's gonna get long--so if anyone doesn't want 2 read abt my conflicting hp-fandom thoughts, just scroll away please xx

so, quite honestly, i'm in agreement with you that the entire franchise is tainted by jkr. the truth is that it was never really my intention to join the fandom--i read a single fic because it went viral on tiktok, then decided to rewrite the fic from another character's pov just for fun. at that point, i hadn't read any other hp fic and had never been involved in any kind of online fandom space, and although i'd read the hp books + watched the movies growing up i hadn't touched them in years + was so far removed from the franchise that i vaguely remembered hearing jkr had said some terfy stuff, but wasn't aware of the extent to which her politics were like. actively and significantly causing real-life harm.

anyway, i'd done a rewrite for fun of another story i liked and had posted it on ao3, and that had received a handful of people commenting + talking about the story with me as i wrote but had remained pretty self-contained + small. i was expecting the same sort of thing with the hp fic i rewrote, but instead someone posted about it on tiktok and it went viral, and then suddenly there were thousands of people reading every ch update and hundreds of comments. like i said, i had never been involved in an online fandom space before, so i sort of awkwardly stumbled into it and tried to figure out what i was doing as i finished up writing the fic. this was at a point in my life where i'd recently moved to a different country and had to go back in the closet after being publicly out for years, and this online fandom space became my only queer community and a bit of a lifeline in that way. i started making actual friends and talking to people + getting more deeply involved in the community aspect of things.

at the same time, i started actually educating myself on jkr + her politics + her impact, and the more i learned the more uncomfortable i became with being part of anything hp-related. now, i've been writing hp fic for almost two years and 'active' in the fandom for ~one and a half, and despite being grateful for the friends i've made and treasuring the space i've been able to cultivate, i've become increasingly disenchanted with 'the fandom' as a whole and have increasingly found it to be a hostile space, so i've sort of taken a step back from broader engagement and more + more have limited my interaction to just my mutuals here on tumblr. unfortunately, i think many of the 'bad parts' of this fandom are somewhat built-in because of the source material; there are a lot of people who agree with jkr's politics to varying extents and that can make it kind of a miserable place to be sometimes. i know many people insist that hp can be completely removed from jkr, but i don't think that's the case, and i've talked on my blog before about the fact that her politics are built into the very foundations of the text, so i think it's necessary to acknowledge her influence if we want to actually engage with hp at all in a way that isn't just perpetuating her politics.

all that being said, the point i'm at currently is that i'm not really sure that this fandom is a space i want to be a part of forever. again--i understand how it can be lifeline for some people and a queer community they might not have elsewhere, because that's been the case for me. but for me personally, as much as i value my own carved-out space, it doesn't completely outweigh the negatives that i have found myself coming into contact with more and more in this fandom. writing hp fic is also something that i keep strictly separate from 'real life,' contained solely in this online space, because i know that any engagement with hp is a red flag for many, many trans people and i don't want to bring it outside of this space. within this online space, i don't keep it a secret that i write hp fic; it's right at the top of my blog so that anyone who wants to can easily block and unfollow me. i only post my fics on ao3, where they are clearly tagged as harry potter fanfiction, and i only post about hp fic + fandom stuff on this blog, which was specifically created for that purpose. i've requested that people no longer post about my hp fics on platforms like tiktok where the algorithm could send it out onto anyone's fyp, and that request is also in my pinned faq. keeping my hp fic as contained as possible to only people who are already engaging with hp fic is one way that i try to mitigate any harm that might be caused by my fics contributing to hp's ongoing popularity.

the other ways i try to mitigate potential harm are by actively discouraging people from giving any financial support to hp + jkr and by being very vocal about my politics on this page, so that anyone who is following me will be getting pro-trans and anti-gender essentialism politics along with any hp engagement. i also don't engage with hp uncritically; i am specifically critical of the shitty politics in the books both in my posts on this blog and my fics themselves. i don't make it a secret that i think the books are politically rotten all the way down through to the foundations.

none of this is to say that there's, like...a Right Way to engage with this content or a set of rules that, if followed, Absolve All Shittiness. this is just an explanation of the personal evaluations i've had to weigh when it comes to deciding how i'm going to interact with content that is fundamentally opposed to my own politics. and again, i don't blame people who think that any amount of engagement is morally untenable and completely block it out. this is a growing source of cognitive dissonance in my own life, and i'm increasingly considering whether/for how much longer i want to continue to write fic + be involved in hp fandom. but for the time being, i'm still here + still writing fic, and i guess my feeling is that any harm that fic causes is a drop in the bucket, and even if i were to stop writing it wouldn't necessarily have a huge impact either way. i'm just some random guy online like everyone else; even though i talk about politics, that doesn't mean that i'm asking to be held up as some sort of moral standard, nor do i think anyone should be expected to be 100% politically perfect in every action they take--like, for me, writing hp fic kind of falls into the same category as like...eating mcdonalds even though i think factory farming is fucked, or buying + wearing makeup sometimes even though i think the beauty industry is fundamentally corrupt, or paying to see the new guardians of the galaxy movie in theaters even though i think marvel movies are us military propaganda. i don't think "no ethical consumption under capitalism" is an excuse to completely abandon any attempt to mitigate the harm our actions might cause, but it does matter to me the way in which someone is engaging with a fundamentally broken/corrupt piece of media beyond simply whether or not they're engaging at all. at the end of the day, it's up to everyone on their own to evaluate where they draw the line on hp, and i am not looking to make that judgment for anybody else considering that my own thoughts + feeling about it are still changing.

[namelesspastel]

Once Bitten....: Chapter 1

Hello! I'm Pastel, a Sasaki to Miyano fanfic writer. You can find me on AO3 under namelesspastel. This is the first chapter of one of my (personal) favorite stories I've written. Enjoy!!

In this world, vampires exist. No, they don’t exist like they do in the movies or in fiction, but they are real.

It’s been found that via modern science that rather than being bitten or something along those lines, vampires are actually just humans that go through a genetic mutation in the womb. Whatever mutation that is, causes vampirism; the need to drink blood to survive, a slow aging rate making them seem almost immortal, sensitivity to sunlight and heightened physical and mental abilities. Pure-blood vampires always need to drink blood directly from a living being in order to survive.

There are two ways vampires come to exist; a vampire is born between two vampires and a vampire is born between two humans – the baby have mutated before birth. These vampires are considered pure-blood vampires, and the older the vampire linage, the more pure they are considered.

The other way vampires come into existence is by a human and a vampire having a child. The child has about 50/50 chance of becoming a human or vampire, the with the first stages showing in young childhood – approximately around three to four years old. The child will typically show one of the following signs: a need for blood, heightened sensitivity to sunlight, or remarkable athletic and academic prowess. If any of those appear, there’s a good chance the child is a half vampire, a dahmpire, a creature that can live off of both human food and blood.

Some dahmpires need more food than blood and some need more blood than food. Some can take in blood packs, some need it directly from the source. They might not be as athletic or as smart as a pure-blood but they typically do better than humans. They also aren’t as sensitive to the sun as pure-bloods. But no vampiric person is a morning bird.

There are some cases – very, very few – in which a person with a human parent and a vampire parent doesn’t awaken in the early stages of childhood and rather, awakens in the early to late stages of adolescence….

My name is Yoshikazu Miyano, I’m a third year in middle school and I just got my first craving for blood.

***

I knew that there was a chance I could become a vampire – my father is one after all – but having gone through all of primary and almost all of junior high without a single inkling of wanting blood or any of the other signs (aside from being a night owl but I am a teen in junior high, that’s normal), I thought I was in the clear.

But all that came crashing down when one of my classmates cut themselves on some paper. It wasn’t a serious wound, but did it bleed. And all I could think about was how it would taste.

Needless to say, I freaked out and went home early that day. Despite my parents best efforts, I’ve been stuck in my room since. That happened at the beginning of July. It’s almost September now and I still haven’t stepped foot in my school.

I spent my time reading manga and surfing the net. While I was idly looking through some blogs, I came across one that had a band I recognized from a drama I had watched recently. The blog itself was simple, it wasn’t very eye-catching and to be honest, the person running the blog didn’t seem that interested in posting daily, but their posts when they did make them really showed just how much they enjoyed music and the bands they were writing about.

Working up my courage after a few weeks of checking the blog out, I made an account and posted a comment. It hadn’t been anything serious, just a simple comment saying how I had come across the band myself. I hadn’t expected a response and yet, within an hour of me posting that comment, I got an email saying there had been a reply. I was curious and checked and found that the owner themselves had responded to my comment. They had responded enthusiastically about the drama and asked if I had heard any of their other works. And just like that, I started regular contact with the owner of the blog.

We only talked through email, but I did learn a few things. They were my senpai, a year older so a first year in high school. They had started the blog simply because their friends had said they should. Apparently their friends said they needed a hobby and music was something they already liked so it was easy enough. One of the reasons they had replied to my comment was because I was a name they hadn’t recognized. Most of the people who left comments were their friends from school who knew about the blog or bots.

I told them about how I had stopped going to school since July and how I was afraid of going back. It was easier to tell a stranger, someone who I couldn’t see physically, and get across my true feelings about the matter. I didn’t ever bring up the whole dhampire thing though. While vampires were accepted in society as just commonplace, I was still struggling with the fact that I was one now. I played it off as simply a form of anxiety, which in a way it was.

Hmm… that does sound tough. I get that though. It can be hard to return after making a scene like that. Kinda like a you missed your moment kinda thing. Did you talk to the person from school? Get their opinion on it?

No… I never thought to reach out. I was just so freaked out, I hadn’t even thought about what my reaction was like to them…

Were you close?

Hmm… I wouldn’t say we were close but they sat next to me in class. We talked sometimes. They were in the art club and asked me to model for them a few times. I turned them down, though.

Ooh? Could I actually be talking a beauty this whole time without knowing it?

No comment.

ww don’t worry about it, I’m kidding. Anyway, since you stopped going to school, I’m assuming that means you aren’t thinking about high school?

… I don’t know. I mean… I do want to go to high school but… what if the same thing happens again? What if someone gets hurt and I freak out again? I’m scared I won’t be able to stop myself…

Well, I can’t tell you not to worry about it. But maybe it might be good? A change of pace. A different school with a different set of people. If you pick one that’s kinda far away, there’s a chance that people from your school won’t even go there. Or maybe you can pick one of those all one gender schools? That way even if you did run into someone, at least you’d know you’d be on the same level.

“Huh…” I said softly, reading senpai’s message. I hadn’t thought of that. An all boys school a bit far away… there was one that I’d had my eye on. It was about three stations away, and also allowed students to live in dorms. If need be, I thought I could ask my parents to let me stay in the dorm but with my awakening the whole idea of high school had been thrown out the window. But maybe they were right. A change of pace might be a good idea after all.

“But can I even get into high school anymore…?” I pondered aloud. My grades had been good enough before I stopped going to school but I wasn’t sure if I could keep up now. “Hmm… I wonder if this awakening would help me with that… but if I’m serious about this I should probably–” I was cut off by a knock at my door.

“Yoshi-kun?” My mom called, slowly opening the door and peeking inside. “Do you have a moment?”

“Sure. What’s going on, mom?” I asked, closing my laptop and focusing on her. She nodded and came in, sitting on my bed beside me.

“Well, your father and I have been discussing some things… do you still want to go to high school? Or would you rather just stop at middle school? As long as you have your compulsory education, it should be fine but…” She paused and took a breath before giving me a soft smile. “Sorry, I didn’t mean for that to come off like I was a pressuring you.”

I shook my head. It was fine, I knew my extended absence from school was probably causing my parents a lot of stress, even if they did understand what was going on.

“Anyway, we’ve been discussing things like I said and we came across some schools that are specifically for vampires. While you might only be a half, I don’t see why they wouldn’t let you in. Your grades from before were a little on the low side for this type of school but if you attend cram school, I think you’ll just about make it…” She said, shuffling some papers she had in her hands. I hadn’t noticed them before and a quick glance told me that they were brochures.

“Actually mom… I’ve been thinking about it and…”

***

Senpai! Sorry I haven’t been responding lately. Things have been a bit hectic. Thanks to your advice, I talked to my parents and decided to go to high school! For now, I’m just going to attend cram school – kind of as a way to play catch up and see where I am. Depending on how that goes though, I think I might actually return to school. I’m still kind of scared if I’m being honest...

Hey! Long time no speak! That’s great about you moving forward, I’m glad I could help, even though I don’t think I did much ww as for the whole returning back to school thing… I think it’s really brave of you. Really. From what you said, that moment was really scary for you but it seems like you’re doing better now. I think if it’s you, you’ll be able to do it. Actually, I don’t think, I know.

… thank you, Senpai. For everything up until now. Um, I’m going to be busy now but is it okay if I still message you from time to time? It… it really helps.

Of course! Message me whenever you feel like. It can be about anything. I really enjoy our little chats.

If you enjoyed that (or if it just caught your interest at all), feel free to read the rest here!

[all-for-the-simps]

Who is Frost?

CoD x Original Character  Call of Duty: Modern Warfare II 

Context: This is like an AU type deal. I have never played CoD, I’ve only watched the MW2 cutscenes but I am obsessed and I simp for these characters. So, I made an OC for it :). This is that OC (most of his details are mentioned throughout future fics etc etc, so he’s a bit of a mystery on purpose).

A/N: I know this is an x male reader blog, but I just wanna show you my OC (‘cause I love him)

🚫female-aligned people DNI🚫

—--

Who is Frost?

Callsign: Frost

(Real) Name: [He does not tell people his real name unless he can trust them because he wants to protect his family]

Age: 30

Pronouns: He/him

Gender: Male

Sexuality: Gay

Parents: English father, Japanese mother.

Personality: Sarcastic, extroverted, confident, sassy, a bit of a rule-breaker, chaotic in a sort of immature, childish way, fierce, fiery, headstrong, determined, strategic, intelligent, insecure at times, impulsive, value others' lives above his own, has anger issues, gets agitated easily, and sometimes irritable, talks back to superiors and doesn’t care about consequences.

More: He earned the name ‘Frost’ in the cage because he has a reputation for being cold and ruthless. It’s ironic since he is actually a very warm person by nature. He’s tall and buff and looks intimidating, but it is actually not that scary when you get to know him. He’s not a giant teddy bear or a gentle giant, by any means, he’s too rough for that. He wears a somewhat Japanese-styled shirt that’s cut like a tank top, just so he can show off his tattoos. People think he’s just a himbo, but that’s wrong, he may be fun-loving but he’s not short of intelligent. People are quick to judge him, which he finds annoying, but he proves that he’s more than what they think every time. He learned how to use a sword and other martial art techniques as a child from his grandfather and through the years, he developed those skills and joined the army, cage fighting on the side.

-----

How did Frost join 141?

Frost earned money by fighting at a semi-illegal cage fight ring.

(I say ‘semi’, because while the facility and the fighters aren’t committing a criminal offence, the people betting are.)

At the time, Price had heard about Frost from Laswell, his past training and his skills.

However, Price wanted to see the man for himself.

So, Price went out to find this ‘Frost’ guy. 

Price approached him at a bar (this bar’s basement was where the cage fighting was held) after the fights were over for the night.

Frost was confused about who he was and what Price wanted with him.

Price realised the bar was still full and it’s kind of awkward to ask someone “Hey! You’re soldier material, wanna join my fuckin’ special task force?”

Like no one does that.

So, what Price did was write the address of the base on a piece of paper and give it to Frost and straight up left with little to no introduction or explanation.

It went like this: - Price: “Nice fighting.”

- Frost: “Thanks.”

- Price: “My name is Captain Price of Task Force 141.”

- Frost: “... Oooookaaay???”

- Price: “Meet me here tomorrow morning.” *Hands note over*

- Frost: “... Alright, but why-”

- Price: *Walking out of the bar*

- Frost: *?????*

Frost was beyond confused at this point. Like alright, fuckin’ weirdo.

But after looking at the note, he realised it was a base of some kind.

Being the curious bugger he is, he decided that he’d go check it out.

--

So the next morning, he got up, drove to the address and was stopped at the gate by a couple of soldiers.

Unsure of what to do from here, he just showed them the note he had been handed.

- Frost: “I’m here to see a Captain Price?”

- Guard: “He gave this to you?” - Frost: “Look, man. I know you’re sceptical and shit, but honestly, I have no idea why I’m here either so like…”

When finally inside, Frost got out of the car and just kinda stood there, waiting for someone to show him to Price.

He met up with Price and was shown around the base

He then met the rest of the 141 team and they all exchanged introductions

Frost was asked about his past career and was asked to demonstrate his technique and stuff like that.

Frost did so, not really questioning it. 

When asked which kind of gun he preferred using, Frost just went: - “Uh… Katanas??”

Confusion ensues as people realise this man was mainly trained in the martial arts rather than shooty shooty pew pews.

Price asked if he could show them his sweet sweet Katana skills, so mans ran back to his car and got out his little Katana carrier box. Why he keeps it in his car, no one will ever know, he’s weird like that.

Demonstrate skill and blah blah blah, they all think he’s cool now.

Price takes Frost to his lil office thing and sits him down, explaining why he was there and who everyone was and what they were doing there.

Offers Frost a place on the team, praising his skill and saying what a good addition he would be.

Frost considers this offer for a good solid… 5 seconds before being like: - “Hell yea, dude, I’ll do it. Get paid better too.”

Price does not appreciate the name ‘dude’.

Frost apologises but sorta just laughs it off quietly.

Tells him to go pack his stuff so he can move onto the base.

Frost does that.

The rest is history.

-----

So, yeah, that's who Frost is. If you have questions, please send them in, I love answering :)

[cxlxssal]

❓if you have any thoughts :>

Plot Ideas. | Accepting. | @evoblue

I'd be lying if I said I had a rock-solid idea for a plot, but I've got pieces for a potential plot beyond "he ran into her while traveling" or a thread like that.

If we wanted to do that, it'd be as easy as her visiting Canalave while she's in Sinnoh for the Lunar Festival event, since that's both where Chris docks his ship and basically where he lives most of the time. Might not work so well, 'cause I'm not participating in that whole thing.

The real plot is under the "read more" because it's just a lot of me throwing idea fragments out there.

If we wanted to count that first thread we had on your archived blog as Blue and Chris meeting for the first time, that might open the door for a little digging on her part if she was so inclined. Let's say he seemed familiar to her for some reason.

Chris used to frequent the Battle Chateau during his Kalos-travelling days, albeit under a false last name, having earned the title of Duke and boasting a 30+ win streak that only ended when he stopped going, putting him just below her status as Grand Dutchess. It'd make sense for the Battle Chateau to keep records of its most prolific guests. It'd make sense for someone like Blue to see those records.

So let's say she went through those records and saw the photos that go with them, only to find his old record. He looks pretty close to the guy she ran into in Galar, has the same duffle bag, also has a Chimchar, and a paper trail she could follow back to him. After all, the only information he lied about was his last name, not anything else.

As for a reason why she'd do that... that, I don't know. Maybe she was curious because, when those records were made, there was a thirteen-year-old kid in Kalos with a Regigigas. I'm totally open to other ideas though.

[reflections-in-a-critical-eye]

hi! i hope you remember me from back when you were still bmt haha. anyways, i was wondering if you've seen "do revenge"? if you have, and as a member of gen z, i am curious of what you thought about it and would like to hear your thoughts.

Hu @pauls-mccharmly of course I remember you! I changed my blog's name to enter a more diversified stage of blogging, but I still know some of the regular people in my likes and comments. Nice to see you here!

I did watch Do Revenge. It was ok, I had more fun than I expected. I wasn't interested in it, although that scene of Sophie Turner screaming about how she's not doing cocaine almost got to me. But I ended playing it on Netflix out of boredom one day so there's that. It's another one of those tongue in cheek, Gen Z, Netflix flicks that people forget after 2 weeks. That's not ok. And it's not like the film is incredibly bad or it feels like a complete waste of time. But there's nothing that really sticks.

Do Revenge was a really mild version of female rage that boils down to exposing secrets through social media. Which is indeed a reflection of most of what we're dealing nowadays in real life, but it feels like a recipe at this point. The comparison with Glenn Close's character in Fatal Attraction falls flat because not one of those girls were anywhere near that. It's like in The Idol where Jocelyn was watching Basic Instinct which to me backfired as it only showed how completely devoid of eroticism were the sex scenes in the show compared to the movie they were referencing. I mean, if we're making allusions to some classic 80s and 90s erotic thrillers, it better be worth it. But it's usually not cause that genre is long gone.

Do Revenge also sticks as some morally correct Gen Z feminism by ultimately making it into a fight against patriarchy. Nothing wrong with that. But it was made in such a way to overshadow the evil and bitchiness the female characters had in them before that. By the end of the movie, they all become friends again and oh, how nice everything is. To me, it felt like in order to send a message, they sacrificed the characters being multi-dimensional. It went from rage to female friendship against misogyny. Cool. I'll probably find the same theme in a dozen more other films.

Anyway, there's this film Bottoms that it's being released now. I'm not sure if it's any similar, but from the trailer it looks like it's set in high school as well and the protagonists look like some fun dumb girls? Hahaha. I'll probably check that out too.

[divinamour]

I know you didn’t reblog an “ask me about my character” meme or anything but I’m curious—-how did you get into Skrulls? What caught your fascination? How long have you had your characters and what gave you your ideas? How have they changed since their original conception? No need to answer if you don’t want, I know I’m probably asking for a novel here!

Flicks cigarette out the got damned window.

Definitely don't think it'll be... a 'novel'. It's gonna be KINDA long, but definitely not 'read more' long. I hope. I wrote this part first, no idea how this is gonna end and I'm not going back to edit this.

Fourteen years ago I think in... June? So fourteern years ago, two months from now, I was living my best life! I was- fourteen? Fourteen, going to school, hating myself, etc. etc. All the hits. All the good ones, all the big ones. And then one day my Grandma came by and was like 'C'MON! We're going out to get Chinese!'

Yadda yadda yadda, we finish eating, step outside. Storefront right next to the Takeout? Comic Book Shop! (Which was closed down when I went back to see it on vacation. Friend told me it closed down a few years ago too. Damn. Anyway!)

Go inside, I'm looking around, I'm looking around. Pick up a Spawn Issue, grab a Batman comic, think it was New 52, might've been Court of Owls, don't really remember, and the- !!! Oh, what's this? Who's this- this green alien man glaring at me? Marvel Omnibus for an Event? Holy shit I've never had an Event OMNIBUS before, this sounds awesome! Who the- What's... What's the 'Secret Invasion'?

And that was fucking it. I read the WHOLE thing that day, all the tie ins included. I went on the internet started looking these little green bitches up. What's their beef? I remember them from Marvel Ultimate Alliance, but- I mean the Super Skrull was just a top-down bitch for me to bully in that game, I didn't respect him! But after reading about their war? Their gods, their struggles, them getting their asses WHIPPED by Norman Osborn?! (Shout out Norman, I see you killing Veranke! Love you, bubbe!)

About a week after I got through the Omnibus I was HOOKED. I was all fucking in, chief. I was ABOUT IT. I can't tell you WHAT it was about the Skrulls that made me sit up and pay attention. Can't tell you what line of dialogue, or what issue, what fucking writer?

My favorite part of Secret Invasion wasn't even the Skrulls! It was T'Challa defeating the Skrull Invasion of Wakanda by his fucking self. HE had the best line in that whole event.

Warskrull Hybrid with Beta Ray Bill, Bullseye, Elektra and Wolverine's powers: You can not defeat me. I have been trained my entire life specifically to kill you.

T'Challa, walking up ready to get to it: Then you have already lost. For I have trained my entire life to defeat the unknown.

WHAT!??! YOU CAN JUST SAY THAT!? TO AN INVADING ARMY THAT HAS SOLDIERS MADE UP OF LIKE... SEVEN OF EARTH'S GREATEST THREATS! AT A TIME!? AND HE WON TOO! He killed the invading force and wrote 'SKRULLS STAY OUT OF WAKANDA' IN SKRULL BLOOD ON THE ROYAL TOWER FOR ALL TO SEE.

Fuck the Skrulls, I want more of THAT from T'Challa!

Anyway, digressing a bit, I have no idea. Truly. I hate Veranke, can't stand her, and she was the only real 'named' Skrull in the event. Kly'bn and S'lgurt's words got repeated a lot, but they were really only there to get fucked up and set in motion some NEXT cosmic event for readers not to give a shit about.

My favorite Skrull in the whole event sort of... disappeared in the middle of an issue and then never reappeared again in canon. Or if he did, I have no idea cause he wasn't in the rest of the event and he's not on any MCU cast lists yet so?

I made the FIRST iteration of the Cosmic Skrull blog in 2015. The first post on that blog was on September 29th, 2015 and it was a picture of a toolbox, because Ana'Hira wasn't supposed to be a GODDESS, or an INFILTRATION EXPERT, she was supposed to be The Mechanic!

She was supposed to be a Sage / Reverse Forge character. She could see something, break it down with her cosmic awareness, understand it perfectly, and then recreate, create specs for it, etc. etc. The original story was:

Eat all her siblings, combine their Power Cosmic with hers, and escape the Crunch.

Get caught by SWORD in a Post-Invasion Climate, be tortured by Abigail Brand personally, get turned into an asset for Earth.

Get broken out of the Peak by the Guardians of the Galaxy. Go DEEP into Space, avoid the empire and their bullshit, live life as a merc!

Had to scrap or rearrange a lot of that for this version of the blog. Cut out all the story parts that had to do with writers I'm no longer writing with and adjust things to account for how powerful Ana'Hira's become in years past.

Making Angela & Beatrice Ana'Hira's daughters instead of her 'identities' is me taking the old iterations of this blog, the characterizations and story beats and compressing them into characters that can still exist and be thrown around, without them being T H E driving forces of the cosmic plot, or whatever that means.

8 years worth of changes, growths, downfalls, regressions. It's a lot! The girlies have been through a lot. Ana'Hira's Primary Terran Disguise used to be a White Woman! I think THAT'S honestly the biggest change.

Going from This

To this

I love her just as much as I used to... but I actively hate her now too. Make of that what you will.

[fuzzybilities]

Rainy January Ramblings

This will be more like a stereotypical blog entry, since I wanted to reflect about this January in a personal level, not diving too deep into the media I have been consuming avidly. It’s more like an inventory.

I was able to establish sort of a reading routine lately, so I FINALLY finished “The Surface Breaks” (oof), by Louise O’Neill, and managed to continue “The Turn of the Screw” (Henry James), Jorge Amado’s “Dona Flor e seus Dois Maridos” (Dona Flor and her two husbands), and Tachibana Yuka’s “Seijo no Maryoku wa Bannou desu” (聖女の魔力は万能です The Saint’s Magic Power is Omnipotent) .

But I think the brightest star of this month’s reading spree was “The Great God Pan“, by Arthur Machen (the Brazilian edition was published in 2024 by DarkSide, translated by Andrio dos Santos). I started and finished it this month, and it’s just SO GOOD! It’s crazy to me how it never got a movie adaptation. In the hands of a Del Toro or a Flanagan, or even Eggers, it could be amazing.

It’s a Victorian mystery slash (cosmic) horror novella about an enigmatic woman and a series of dying (not so gentle) gentlemen. I think it’s best if read without knowing a lot about the narrative, that’s why I’m keeping it as vague as possible, but it was a big influence to Lovecraft (and many other authors), and its publication was apparently scandalous to Victorian audiences (mainly due to implied sexual content). If you’re into the occult—and seeking a good suspenseful narrative—, I highly recommend it.

So, I’m a real couch potato, but I’ve been trying to keep my legs somewhat active and my weight under control, therefore I linked this book-reading routine to a stationary bike in order to kill two birds with one stone and all. Meaning I limit my reading time to the bicycle time and vice-versa to make sure I’ll have something to read while exercising, and to make sure I’ll be exercising while reading…

Anyways, I had to restrain myself in order not to keep reading “The Great God Pan” after stationary bike hours. It didn’t feel like a chore (let’s be honest: not all books are made equal, and some of them require willpower to get to the ending; the biking-reading routine helps me in those cases too, because I have to read something to keep going ’cause only god knows how I hate exercising ugh), and I was curious about the developments. The Brazilian edition also had these interesting complementary essays about Pan, the deity, and his representations across the arts.

I struggled before to keep this habit going because reading feels like a bigger commitment than mindlessly scrolling through my socials—not to mention it’s a big part of my job… But it’s also more rewarding, so there’s that. (On that note, I’m also limiting screen time on social media to force me to resort to other activities… including writing in this God-forsaken page.)

---

This month I also went to the movies to see HIM. The phenomenon, the angel of some other celestial sphere, the appetite: Dracu…er, Nosferatu. I’m still gathering my thoughts about it. And by gathering my thoughts I mean violently hiperfocusing on the story, the adaptations, the trivia, the memes! Did you know, for instance, that Bill Skarsgård wore a prosthetic penis? And that Eggers framed it and gave it to Nicholas Hoult after filming wrapped or something like that? Yes, that’s crucial info… says my brain. Incidentally, I decided Count Orlok’s Prosthetic Cock is the name of my punk band now.

That’s not the only movie watched this month, though. First one was 2023’s Love at First Sight (pretty OK), the original Nosferatu (Murnau’s), The VVitch (yeah, in preparation for more Eggers), Babylon (2022), Perfect Blue (traumatized by it now), The Boy and the Heron (a little Ghibli for good measure), Buñuel’s Cet Obscur Objet du Désir (That Obscure Object of Desire), Jordan Peele’s Nope, and finally Mulholland Drive. Looking at this selection side by side, I see this month was full of thrillers, dream-like scenarios and horror… Interesting.

I’d like to keep my ideas marinating before actually reaching a verdict and writing a full review, so I might expand on some of these stories later.

---

Finally, I was able to start and finish a game in my Switch library: Witchy Life Story. It’s short, not too complex, focused on the visual narrative rather than the mechanics… which is kind of a bummer, since I liked the idea of cultivating a garden and working on potions and spells to help the people in a village. This game was no Potion Permit, though. The graphics are super cute, the music is soothing, and I enjoyed some parts of the narrative, but the characters are generally kind of… off-putting? Including the player character, who’s a little bratty. I think it’s not something aimed at my age bracket (a.k.a.: old). One of the game’s pros, though, was its inclusivity: you’re able to choose your own pronouns (there’s a lot of mixed possibilities) and appearance… although it doesn’t do much, since the story is quite linear and fixed. However, I don’t regret getting the game; it was enough to keep me entertained for some days (apparently you can finish it in about 4 hours, but there’s no need to rush).

Now I’m hooked on Spirittea, a game where you manage a bathhouse for spirits—clearly inspired by Spirited Away, both thematically and aesthetically. It definitely has A LOT to explore and solve, but the core mechanics is management with a tint of puzzle. There’s also a narrative aspect, because you have to befriend the locals of your town in order to unlock events, spirits, maps, recipes etc. And, boy, are there a lot of villagers and places and schedules to keep track of… Sometimes it can get a bit overwhelming. However, the events don’t seem time-sensitive. I mean, there are seasons, but I guess we don’t have to rush in order to complete everything. Some days I just focus on managing the bathhouse and that’s all. One of the most interesting aspects is that you can raise your relationship gauges by playing mini games with the villagers. So far, I think I’ve only played games with talking or gift-giving as relationship mechanics. I love its retro aesthetic, and the music kind of reminded me of Persona 3 soundtrack for some reason.

Anyway, it’s been fun, even if a bit time-consuming. (Because it’s fun and I want to keep playing it…)

---

January has been quite a rainy month here (it’s Summer after all), and I’ve been a little gloomy lately due to the global fuckery going on (especially on the US), but I’m glad I was able to enjoy all these media, looking back now.

Not only that, I managed to journal and write a bunch of things, paint some small watercolors (after a long time) and resume a miniature I was assembling previously.

I think keeping track of the things you do/watch/play/listen to/play helps, because when there are no receipts you tend to think nothing was done or accomplished, and that is so untrue!

My message for the year ahead? Keep enjoying the art you all enjoy, find new interesting things to love, take up hobbies, connect with the people that make you safe, comfortable and happy, block the haters, make the nazis lives miserable, and stop using AI, for fuck’s sake!

[lqfiles]

user lqfiles i have no idea what to call you.

see saying "hello tumblr user lqfiles" sounds ominous and it's giving sigma... god i hate that word. i have beef with the gen alpha slang, everytime i hear a reel with "what the sigma" i grow a little closer to throwing that toaster right into the bathtub. ANYWAYS, my point is that i'm going to figure out how to come up with a nickname for you. it'll come, eventually trust. i'll think of one okay. something to do with l & q idk. unless there's something else you want me to call you? ALSO NOOO IM NOT RICH. 😭😭 as i mentioned before i bought like... 3x the amount of pcs i OWNED BEFORE i went on a buying spree. so all i had was just the pcs i collected from albums that were gifts from friends... (i never thought it a good idea to spend money on this stuff for myself.) I was actually traveling abroad which was why i hadn't checked in for a bit, and the prices... were just so much cheaper!! So I decided, why not? fuck it we ball! (my life motto to everything at this point...) and i'm in a decent financially stable point in my life where i can indulge in this stuff, so i bought quite a bit... i tried to focus on buying pcs... cause storing albums in my suitcase makes it a lot heavier.

i definitely have a hand kink its not a joke anymore. IT REMINDED ME OF THIS IMAGE (idk if it's going to work if it doesn't uh.... ignore! cause i've never sent links on anon and tumblr hates making things easier for us.) https://postimg.cc/1gWC0B48 AND IDK IF YOU CAN SEE IT BUT ITS SO FUNNY I COULDNT STOP LAUGHING. they're both me

i also have no idea who louis partridge is BUT HOLY FUCKING SHIT I JUST LOOKED HIM UP AND GOD DAMN. like my taste in men is obviously questionable, and like most people i did have a thing for andrew garfield and theo james... but i think i often find myself crushing on east asians half of the time, mostly because i am eastern asian myself, and it's not like on purpose cause i do find other races hot, it's just the way i grew up finding famiiarity in those faces? does that make sense idk im yapping at this point.

ALSO THE SMAU IS SO FUNNY IM CAUGHT UP NOW.... HAECHAN LITERALLY GOING THROUGH ALL STAGES OF GRIEF. HE WANTS HER SO BAD BUT ALSO THE COMPLAIN ABOUT THE WHOLE PINTREST BROWSING.... LIKE HES SO REAL AND CUTE AT THE SAME TIME I LOVE HIM. (chatgpt is too real AND THE FACT THAT y/n IS EATING IT UP IS SO FUNNY LIKE I WOULD'VE ALREADY BEEN LIKE.... why does this sound like it's written by ai...) holy fuck that's a lot i ranted a lot anyways hello, look forward to the next chapter. love you and hope u have a great day TUMBLR USER LQFILES - 🤠

hejdhskdj sometimes i’m tempted to put my name back in my about me so you guys can put a name to my account but then i remember how don’t wanna be perceived THAT much and rethink #SOZZZZ idk maybe i’ll come up with a new alias that you can start addressing me by, tho if you’re curious you can figure my name out if you find my main blog and check my tags 😭

you’re gonna hate me omgg bc except for the word sigma (cos that cringe) i unfortunately love brainrot content atm… like yess give me the skibidi toilet rizz party, give me the ohio fanum tax, GIVE ME RHE MAXIMUM AURA 😅😂 the effect of living with little boys..

FUXK IF WE BALL IS SUCH AN AMAZING LIFE MOTTO like exactly.. we are ballin.. anyways you not spending any money yourself on albums is sending me lmaooo but at least you were able to use the money you had saved to buy yourself some cheeky pcs. tbh i think pcs are the only appealing part for most part when buying an album anyways so it’s a good thing that you didn’t buy albums lmaooo

THE IMAGE IS SHOWING LMAOOOO i love this pic so bad ughhh he has such nice hands i wish i could hold his hands and play with them.. the perfect mix between girly dainty hands and manly veiny like I WANXTHU SO BAD HAECHAN

MOST PEOPLE MUST NOT INLCUDE ME… but tbh i don’t think i have a specific race i like in men, THO IM IN MY ARABIC BOYS ERA RN… idk if anyone knows slushynoobz but hamza.. i wantchu saaaur bad like GIVE ME THE YEMENI BOY.. also i don’t think it’s weird to prefer your own people!!! its something a lot of cultures have too so don’t worry about it you’re not yapping, my mum is the same 😭

LOLLLL HAECHAN EXPERIENCES THE LOSS OF HIS UNOFFICIAL GF he was probably with his head in his hands when she didn’t respond to his apex request. and ntm he tweaked the letter a bit to make it more personalised!!! a bit of ai here and there but still personal!!!!

I LOVE YOU TOOO COWBOY ANON!!!

[lyssafreyguy]

hey actually fuck whatever everyone else wants i wanna talk about The Post asdkakhsdsa this is gonna be kinda long and i'm so fucking sorry

so for context to anyone who follows me who DOESN'T know about it The Post is this post that someone made where they took screenshots of me replying to someone in the notes of another post

and i wanna talk about it! partly cause it was super fucking funny that this even happened and i haven't been able to stop thinking about it but also maybe anyone who comes to my blog because they were curious about who i am can check this post out and get proper context to everything

before i keep going i wanna get a few things out of the way real quick in no particular order:

not that i think that anyone following me would do this but don't bother the OP- i know who he is i've reblogged his posts before i have a general vibe of who he is so i know that he wasn't necessarily posting it for the sake of like. anyone harassing me can't speak for whether or not that applies to the other person but i would assume not).

going along with that when i first found out about The Post it had less than 1k but i could tell it was gonna really rack up those notes really really fast and i had to very quickly make peace with the fact that 1. statistically speaking at least one person was gonna see it and not think of me as the Good Guy in the situation/were also gonna consider me just as much of a weird obnoxious idiot or whatever and 2. that as most viral tumblr posts do it was gonna reach out of bounds at some point- all that being said no one so far has went out of their way to bother me and i genuinely appreciate it! peace and love on planet earth. :)

MY ICON ISN'T DEKU. IT'S NOT FUCKING DEKU. I'VE NEVER HAD A DEKU ICON AND I NEVER WILL. MY ICON IS MY SAD WET PATHETIC BEARD RYUKI KURUTO. IT'S NOT MY PROBLEM THAT YOU BITCHES SEE A MAN WITH SHAGGY DARK HAIR AND JUST IMMEDIATELY ASSUME IT'S DEKU. GO PLAY AI: THE SOMNIUM FILES NIRVANA INITIATIVE ON STEAM/PS4/PS5 RIGHT NOW. 🔫👀

with all that said here's the background behind what happened: late March i was going through someone's blog and came across this post:

(the main reason i wanna show the post that this all happened on is because without any context and just going off of what this person said people assumed that they were being weirdly transphobic which isn't the case! they were actually being weirdly homophobic! but also if that had actually been the case it still would've panned out the same way. i said what i said and i stand by it.)

posts like these are some of my favorite posts on here because 9/10 there're people in the replies/comments just leaving the most absolutely shit takes you ever seen and i've made a habit of going into them to look out for those people and block them which is what i was doing when i saw that person's reply- the truth is that i honestly didn't intend to reply with what i said! what i was gonna reply was actually wayyyyyyyy dumber: because they were being specifically homophobic my dyke ass was gonna spin what they said into an "hey just so you know i fucked your mom lol" comeback. because i'm 5.

obviously that didn't happen; i had spent a weird chunk of time trying to actually construct my reply multiple times and NONE of them were coming out in a way that made sense and sounded actually funny to me. and the more time i spent trying to construct it the more time i had to actually sit with and reread and take in what this person said. and after a certain point i got to a stage that i usually get with people like ter/fs where i say to myself "oh my God what is this person's fucking problem" and just like i always do when i'm at that point with anyone else i decided that before i finally just block them and move on i wanna go on their blog and see what they're about- this usually ends up in me seeing that their posts are just basically the same shit opinions that i just saw; other times it's stuff like hypersexual fanart of anime schoolgirls occasionally broken up with posts talking about how sad and lonely they are (bidoof's law in full effect); but other than a post they made where they used the r slur while talking about them being pissed off over tumblr's pikaman posts that you can never get rid of i honestly wasn't finding anything . . . until i got to this ask that they posted, which i directly quote in my reply to them:

(i'm not linking it because like. fuck this person. but i'm still slightly conflicted about giving anyone a direct link to just do whatever they feel like doing to them. if anyone asks i'll either add a link or give it to them directly but for now whether you wanna take my word on this screenshot being unedited or not is 100% up to anyone reading this. i won't be mad if you don't believe me.)

i found this post pretty easily; this person as far as i can tell isn't very active on here so there actually weren't a lot of posts that i had to scroll through to get here- i'd say it was maybe like 5 minutes max. not even. and i bring this up because some people assumed that i was searching up specific keywords to collect evidence or whatever which. to be 100% fair! is something that i do when i'm trying to sus out whether someone that i come across is actively or cryptically homophobic or transmisogynistic or neo-fascist/alt-right. when it comes to anyone else i genuinely don't have anywhere near enough of an interest to actually do this. not to mention that tumblr's search function barely works and i have genuinely no idea if it'll actually bring anything up if you try to search nsfw terms specifically since the whole porn ban happened.

and it mean that's basically it! for anyone reading this who wants to know why i replied to them: they annoyed me and i have the freedom to fire back at them for better or for worse.

for anyone who wants to know why i chose that ask specifically: other than the fact that it was just the first heinous posts of theirs that i saw? adults (which i assume this person is) who are weirdly sexual about minors fictional or not weird me the fuck out and i don't stand by that shit. especially people who brag about it even jokingly. again: i said what i said.

for anyone who wants to know why i worded my reply the way i did: because i thought it would be funny. like come on. i sounded like the world's worst Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney prosecutor. someone tagged that post with "what in the Better Call Saul . . ." and it was so fucking funny. had me cry laughing.

for anyone who wants to know if i'm surprised that someone posted my reply to this person and why: firstly yea i kinda was! secondly much like how you don't realize how much noise you're making in your own home because you forgot that after a certain point people outside can hear you until you like. have the police showing up with a noise complaint. i too in the moment completely forgot that tumblr is, in fact, a completely public website and that people can see what you say even if it's completely by chance. i was so committed to my own stupid little bit that i honestly wasn't even thinking about it. what's done is done tho there's nothing i can do about it at this point.

uhhhhhhh i don't know how to actually end this post . . . um stay healthy and safe! remember to eat good food and drink water! if you haven't indulged yourself in a hobby in a while you should go do that! maybe listen to a long video essay on a topic you've never consumed any information on while you do chores and learn something new! think on the last time you told people important to you that you love and appreciate them and then go do that! mwah mwah.

hey i've had a long day and like it's whatever but my head feels so fucking full can i like. talk about The Post? can i talk about The Post and just get it out cause i kinda wanna talk about it. lmao

[clownsuu]

Honestly Animatronic DJMM deserves a whole lot more love than he gets from this fandom. Human designs are fun but you gotta appreciate the source material too dang it. I just wanna kiss his big nose and hold his giant hand and I'd be happy. I know you share the sentiment

People who don’t like og DJMM are cowards 😤😤😤😤🥄🥄🥄🥄

Like if you like human djmm but not true giant enemy spider djmm? You aren’t a djmm fan smhhhhhhh how can you NOT love the giant bb mans- he is everything and more you could need in a giant enemy spider robot-

Also? Only fucking thing (besides that one thing cough spoilers I shouldn’t worry about spoilers but friend goes through my blog and hasn’t finished cough) that was sleeping when they were supposed to- making him a true certified good boy (at least to moon’s standards)

(Cw small rant MCHFHHDDJ)

LIKE SHID DUDE-

His part of the game was probably one of the most tense parts of the game (not saying a lot tbh the game lacks a bunch of shit) with the giant mans fucking spooking the shit out of you reaching his fucking H A N D into the fucking bathroom and crawling up the walls like a fucking cool ass sPIDER that he IS- and his music? Fucking b a n g e r- really sets the mood and the tension- some real mission impossible shit right there m8- plus the fUCKING HEAD TILLLLLTSSSSS GODDDD ITS ADORABLE- a giant man with small curious gestures- and then stops giving a shit about chasing Greg and just vibes on his lil stage

But back on point- Yeah- what the fard- I go and look for anything djmm related and there is basically zero- nada- majority of it being human version and though at least the human versions gives him more attention-? It’s more so for sex appeal and being hot- (I’m guilty of it I cannot lie LMAO- but iv been drawing more biblically accurate dj cause I absolutely adore this mans smh) there is barely ANYTHING about him and it’s sad. He’s more so seen as a meme than a character- 

Fanfics with him in it is mostly just him showing up for maybe a paragraph or two and just leaving- rarely giving him any love and acknowledgement from the fandom as a whole and it’s sad. The other day I went to shop for any djmm merch anyone was makin so I can get me some of that sweet sweet giant enemy spider pride shit- and majority of merch was just sun and moon (don’t get me wrong- absolutely adore sun and moon- but DAMN they are the biggest attraction-) and it’s like sHIT- I COULD ONLY FIND LIKE- AT MOST 5 THINGS FOR DJ smhhhh

Long story short, dj is criminally underrated, and I’m going to speak to my (non existent) lawyers about it (and cry)

[padfootdaredmetoo]

Hi! I'm new to ur blog, but I wanted to say ur an excellent writer, I really enjoy the way u write peaky's characters 😍 I just got an idea and wanted to request an imagine. U know how throughout the show we see that basically all women fall for Tom Shelby without him even trying? 😂 And I can't help but wonder what it would be like if the situation was reversed? I don't want to limit ur imagination, so I'm not gonna dive deep into his love interest's character. But a few things that I want to add are that maybe in the beginning he was chasing her out of feeling that she was like a challenge? And she knows what he and his fam do for a living plus what he's like with women and she's just not about flings and one night stands, but she lightly plays with him cause she's a lil minx. And he tries so hard to the point when they slowly getting to know each other and he realizes that he starts to develop real feelings for her beyond lust? And she's also like shit I better stay away from him cause I might fall for him. Hard. So they both try to stay away from each other at this point, thankfully she works in London so it's easier for both of them. And after that I really don't know how they gonna end up together 😅 OH! Maybe Polly sets them up?? I just adore this woman so bad 🥺 she was wary about their relationship at first and watched them like a hawk from distance (how they interact with each other, how that woman is with Charles, if she would be able to share dangerous life that they all live and etc) And our aunt Polly approves them 😂 and basically like THESE FREAKING KIDS! I'MMA TAKE EVERYTHING IN MY HANDS and save Shelby boys (one in particular) as usual. Thank u for reading through this and I would feel really blessed if you will find that idea interesting enough for you to write ❤

This was such a cute idea. I hope I did it justice!!!

Thank you!!! That's so sweet of you! I'm happy that you enjoy my blog and like the way I write! Really, that's a huge compliment, especially as I have been feeling self-conscious about it.

XOXO

Warnings: Sad times, drinking, trust issues, one big drama, but happy and cute fluff.

Love was a dangerous game at the best of times. It was even more so in the world of gangsters, and that’s exactly what Thomas Shelby was.

You had a thriving business which left no shortage of suitors chasing after you. You’d known the price of such games early on in life and your lack of interest only made you a person of greater interest.

You first met Thomas at a gala in London. He spent the whole night chasing you around the room with that cold icy gaze. Men would normally give up, but he treated you as if you were the main attraction at the event. Eventually he offered to buy you a drink, which you were too curious to turn down. Why was a Romani gangster at such an event?

He looked so unimpressed with everything, but not you. He enjoyed the way you flirted with him, and kept him on his toes. Most men didn't like that about you, you didn't hold back your opinions.

A night of flirting never hurt anyone, right?

You regretted that moment more than ever right now. You sat, still in your bed clothes looking out at the cold gray sky. You took another sip of wine, and closed your eyes.

He didn't chase you, but you didn't think he went into doing business with you because he thought it was a profitable idea either. Business was always conducted in nicest restaurants in London, you always left him breathless at the door to your apartment.

Waiting for the day he would give up. You weren't interested in being a play thing, you knew how Thomas was with women. He was so charming in his own standoffish way, but you knew that he only liked you because you didn't bend and fall all over him. You demanded respect wherever you went, a small empire at your feet. He liked the challenge, he didn't like you. And you didn't like being used for a night and tossed aside.

You poured the last of the bottle into the glass and sighed. This was pathetic, and yet it was all you could bring yourself to do.

He didn't give up, and kept coming to London to help out. You had a little bit of trouble with a rival gang, things were getting out of hand so you requested for his men to help. Shortly after the death threats increased so he offered to stay the night till everything had blown over. Standing there in the hallway he looked too good to say no to. Maybe you and him had a friendship that demanded more than a cheap fling. He certainly did more than expected to help you out that night.

So you let him in. Spent the night talking, laughing, reminiscing. These were the types of conversations that made women fall in love, and you were playing right into his hands. Soon the threat was over and he was on the way. You promised to cook for him next time he was in London, saying you preferred his company when away from the public eye.

“I’d really like that.” he’d said, a smile ghosting on his lips.

“And I really like you.” You’d whispered, enjoying the way he took a step closer to you. The way his hands felt against the soft skin of your cheeks. The way he looked down into your eyes like you were something amazing. He’d kissed you softly, electricity blooming through your body. Soft and sweet, and yet it left you burning. Desperate after so many years without a kind touch.

“Sleep well, love” He’d said softly before heading down the hallway before you could say anything.

Even now your body was aching and vibrating from the memory.

You were in Birmingham for business and decided to take him for dinner, surprise him. He’d never let you win a round like that though, instead he’d taken you home to meet his family.

You and Ada got together in London fairly often and enjoyed each other's company, but you’d never met the others. They were beyond strange, but they were so warm. You felt yourself start to melt in their presence. It was loud and your ribs hurt from laughing, children would take turns sitting on your lap as the night went on.

You’d really believed he’d done that to see if you’d get along with them if he pursued you.

You sipped at your glass, wishing the heat on your skin would warm the coldness inside you. Tears started to slide down your cheeks. Why were you this stupid? You promised you would never put yourself out there into the hands of a man again. How many more times would you end up broken before you learned your lesson?

Yesterday had started out with nothing out of the ordinary, you met up with Ada for tea. She wanted advice on something and you were excited to hear about the gossip, hoping she’d found herself someone nice. In passing she mentioned some barmaid named Grace. Stating she’d caught Tommy’s eye, how things looked serious.

You tried to behave yourself despite the wave of jealousy crashing down on you.

You gritted your teeth, saying you suddenly felt ill. You went home, holding yourself together tightly before slamming the door to your bedroom and falling to pieces.

After a long night of crying over past loves and the current pain and realization that Tommy had more of your heart than you thought was possible. It was morning, and you were a bottle of wine deep watching the British rain fall onto the street. At least it happened now, you could come back from one kiss. Just had to keep your distance. The wine sloshed in your stomach as you embraced the courage it gave you to pick up the phone.

“Shelby” Her voice ran out and you felt slightly comforted that it was Polly.

“Polly! I’m just calling in about a change to the current arrangement.”

“Ah, it’s always a delight to hear from you, love. Even when it’s just business. So what can we do for you?” She responded warmly.

“Well, I was hoping that moving forward I could do business with you exclusively.” Your heart wrenched up but you knew this was the best way forward.

“What has he done, eh?”

“Nothing, just don’t want his girlfriend to get the wrong idea.” The words slipped out easily despite not being a part of the things you had scripted. You couldn't resist the urge to say it, hopefully she would relay it back to him, let him know you’d caught him. That he’d lost the little game you were playing.

“Alright, well I look forward to visiting you darling.” Her voice had a touch of sadness to it.

“Likewise. Talk soon” The line went dead and a weight lifted from you. Unfortunately the sadness stayed crashing in your stomach like stormy waves against a cliff.

You didn't see a reason to go into the office so you opened another bottle and decided to cook some breakfast.

____________________________

Polly leaned back in her office chair taking a long drag of her cigarette. Men and their bloody cocks. Completely useless and somehow always up to their eyebrows in trouble.

She wasn’t sure of you at first. You wore too much lipstick, and your perfume was expensive. Take away the dress, you'd be a pin up girl. Much too glamorous for a small heath family of gypsy's. But she couldn't have been more wrong, somehow you’d embraced the family. They were not an easy group to settle into and yet you did it like you’d been raised the same.

John’s kids hung off of you the whole night and you’d simply embraced them tightly listening to their fumbling tales. You could play cards, handle your whiskey, and Thomas looked at you like you were a stained glass portrait of a saint. A light source somehow shining through your skin radiating a sense of magic and hope. You lit him up in a way Polly had never seen before.

And he’d gone and chased her out? Over who?

John moved past the door to her office.

“Oi!” She snapped her fingers and he poked his head in.

“Wot?”

“Tommy seeing anyone?” She asked.

“Eh, he’s got something going on with that dame in London, I swear it. She’s a bloody catch. But there’s something going on with the barmaid I think.”

“The barmaid?” Polly wanted to put a bullet in his head.

“Don't think it's like that though.” He crossed his arms and thought for a moment. “Arthur thinks she’s up to something. I figured he was just getting to the bottom of it.” He shrugged.

“Idiot. Why didn’t he speak to me?” She got up and took her coat from the hanger.

There was only one way to put an end to this.

_______

Fuck sakes. He sat there at the same spot at the table he’d been sitting since he was knee high. His aunt yelling at him just the same as she always had.

How did you find out about Grace? Only person in the family you spoke to regularly besides him and Polly, was Ada. He quickly got up from the table and grabbed the phone.

“What did you say to her about Grace?” He asked quickly.

“Well I mentioned that she’d caught your eye. That's all, thought maybe it’d make her a bit jealous, she’d finally make a move.” Tommy swore and slammed the receiver down. Polly started up again.

“Look!” He waited till she was staring him down. “I’m not seeing Grace. I’m flirting with her to figure out who she’s working for. Ada told her something was going on thinking she’d get jealous and stop dragging her feet.”

“Fuck”

“Fuck is right! She’s not like that Poll. Bad stuff happened to her, she’s not - It’s complicated. I thought she was coming around too.” He slammed his hand on the table.

Ada thought you were coy, waiting for a good time to make a move, see what you could get out of him first. Tommy could see you more clearly than that, you were too jumpy and avoidant of men and any relationships. Business oriented is what you’d called it, but there was too much hunger and pain in you for that to be all it was.

“Well. Go!” Polly snapped her fingers.

“Go where?”

“Go to her. Fall to her feet, explain everything. Fucking fix it. I’m handling Grace as of now.”

“We both know she won’t have it.” He said sadly.

“I’ll call her just go.” There was an unusual softness in her eyes and made him give in. It was a stupid idea, but you were worth looking foolish over.

_______________________

You’d fallen asleep after eating an impossible amount of pancakes. You stretched and hated the way your head was pounding from all the wine. The phone rang and you moved across the floor slowly.

“Hello?” You answered by trying to untangle the cord.

“Love, It’s Polly. Now I have a favor to ask, woman to woman.” She sounded abnormally serious, your heart twisted a little bit.

“Of course, what’s happened?”

“Ada phoned and I figure the girlfriend you spoke of was Grace. See Tommy is keeping an eye on her for me, she’s a black cat. I just need to figure out who sent her, you must understand how things in business get at times.”

You paused before answering. Would she lie for him? They were family, but Polly wasn't the type of woman to be involved in such petty things.

“Ah, and misunderstanding then.” your throat closed, this was an unexpected twist that opened a door you weren't sure you wanted to go through.

“Completely darling. I sent him over to talk over resuming business.”

Your heart started to race. Fuck, you needed a bath, your hair was a mess, and your head was still pounding. You mentally slapped yourself, you didn't need to do anything except come up with a solid reason to leave him at the door. This whole thing was a reminder of what's involved when being in a relationship with someone.

“Oh, when should I expect him?” You slapped your hand against your forehead.

“Within the hour, love. If there’s any problems, give me a call.”

“I will thank you” you answered shakily.

“Have a good night.” There was a coy tone to her voice before the line went dead.

Fuck. an hour? You looked around your apartment and quickly started rushing around. You tossed the wine bottles into the oven along with the pan you used to make pancakes with. After wiping down the counter, you started running a bath. Not waiting for it to fill up you climbed in, running a brush through your hair aggressively. You’d just finished washing when there was a knock at the door.

Your heart started to pound, your face incredibly hot. Fuck, fuck, fuck. You thought as you tripped over things, closing your robe.

What you should have done was told him to wait. Gone back into your bathroom, and done your hair and make up, no sense in opening the door in this state. But you couldn't stop your fumbling body from swinging the door open.

And you did. He stood there looking down at you and your unmade appearance.

Now what? Are you going to throw yourself at him? It’s all you're dressed for. You thought silently cursing your choices.

“Sorry, I thought I had more time.” You whispered, watching the way his eyes devoured you.

“Should show up early more often then.” He said with a genuine smile. He made all the muscles in your body taught, it was hard to breathe.

“Would you like to come in?” You asked, wishing there was less space between the two of you. You stepped aside for him to come in. You shut the door slowly, trying to sort yourself out before turning around. But the look on his face silenced every voice of protest in your mind. He looked so open, and sad.

“Look, about what Ada said, It wasn't -” he shook his head and somehow you believed him. He shifted awkwardly "She's got something on us I just don’t kn-”

You flung yourself at him, and his arms wrapped around your waist tightly. You pressed your lips to his and enjoyed the way your body melted against his. He quickly took control of the kiss, pushing it further than last time. His hand held you in place, his tongue sliding into your mouth causing you to moan. He broke the kiss pressing his forehead against yours.

“I’m Sorry.” He said softly, your heart exploding at the fact he would value you enough to apologize despite things obviously being forgiven.

“Me too.” You whispered.

“You're mine then?” He asked in a low tone that made your legs shake. You nodded looking up at him through your eyelashes.

“I’m yours”

_____

Tags list: @tommydoesntpayforsuits @misselsbells06 @kpopgirlbtssvt

[its-deputy-caleb]

Hiii, could i have a request for how the gang members would react to meeting a historian or explorer in the wild?? thank you! I love your blogs sm!!

anon ily <3333 i went wayy overboard with these but i regret nothing bc this was soo cute and fun to write. I hope u enjoy and i made it gn for everyone. I only did the VDL boys for this but if enough ppl like it i might do the girls with something similar idk yet?

Dutch Van Der Linde

Dutch first laid eyes on you when you were hanging off the edge of a cliff after slipping when you got too close to the edge. He immediately ran over to you, helping you off the cliff and getting you settled back on your feet.

He seemed genuinely concerned and agreed to help you safely record the rock carving that was on the side of the cliff face, keeping you from falling.

You were a historian and had been studying these mysterious rock carvings after meeting an equally mysterious man, Francis Sinclair.

You didn’t see much of Dutch Van Der Linde after that until you ran into him again in Saint Denis in the saloon. He remembered who you were instantly and started up a conversation about your work where you chatted away for hours.

You became very close after that and he often accompanied you to Museums and fancy fundraisers that you were invited to.

He’d always get dressed up and complimented your finer outfits which was such a difference to the field gear you’d have on. You’d spend all night chatting away over nice champagne and dancing together before actually engaging with other guests but you didn’t have a care in the world with Dutch in your life.

Arthur Morgan

Arthur finds you standing in the middle of a field, flipping over rocks and staring numbly at what appeared to be a map in your hands.

When he approached you he soon learnt you were a young amateur explorer about to get your big break with a treasure hunt but you couldn’t find the gold bars for the life of you.

Arthur gave you a heart warming smile and held up a gold bar after retrieving it from his satchel having felt a little bad that he’d discovered it not a week before you.

The two of you laughed about it, calling yourself a fool for trying to find it for so long when it was clearly missing— the thought that someone took it clearly never crossed your mind.

Arthur was always a gentleman however and promised to make it up to you. After taking you to dinner and getting to know him better, you spent the next few days camping out and finding a new treasure together.

You travelled through caves and through valleys of flowers to find this treasure. Sometimes it was so beautiful that the two of you just stopped by a stream to let your horses rest and enjoy the scenery.

When you finally found the treasure you gave Arthur a big hug in excitement which caught him by surprised but he happily returned. He let you keep the treasure and wished you luck with more exploring but of course that wasn’t the last time you saw Arthur again.

Charles Smith

Charles meets you one day while you’re out surveying wildlife. You specialised in conservation, wanting to study and protect animal species.

Fresh out of the university from Saint Denis you’d been dying to get out of the confining city and explore the heartlands. That’s where a kind gentleman named Charles Smith had offered to protect you and show you around the herds of bison you’d taken to studying.

You spent days together riding the over the hills and following the herd as they travelled. While you were Charles told you all about his family and the respect and love they have for the beautiful creatures.

It was amazing the array of knowledge Charles knew about bison and you couldn’t stop the smile on your face as he told you about the characteristics of the bison. You rushed to take notes in your journal, knowing that all that he told you would help you study and protect these animals.

“Do you think it’ll actually do any good? The work you’re doing?”

“One can only hope Mr.Smith but I will do everything in my ability to protect such beautiful creatures.”

Even when you had to return to the city for study you constantly wrote to Charles, staying in touch and keeping him updated with all your work. It was hard to say goodbye to someone you’d grown close to but you made regular visits to each other long after that.

John Marston

You first found John in the saloon after a long day at work, in desperate need of a drink. Being a zoologist you instantly noticed the scars on his face and would’ve guessed a wolf was the animal that caused the damage.

The two of you instantly started up a conversation and shared all kinds of stories. He told you about being up on the mountain while you showed him the scar on your arm from your run in with a cougar.

You were collecting a compendium of all the animals across the heartlands and during the months you worked on it, you ran into John more than once.

He was always curious about your work and you often spent time together in the afternoon sun, showing him the animals you’d found so far.

“What about the stray dogs in town or do you only deal with cougars and wolves?”

“Well they’re animals too aren’t they not?”

Even though you couldn’t see John all the time, he often came along with you to see the wildlife and covered you when you were around particularly dangerous animals and you enjoyed every second you had with him.

Micah Bell

When Micah met you he had absolutely no idea what you were on about. In his mind the whole idea of a palaeontologist is ridiculous and made up, much less the fact that you chose to read books and study in your spare time.

At first he doesn’t do anything but mock your work but after running into you time and time again he finally started to come around.

He grew more and more curious when he saw the drawings in your sketch books of dinosaurs and even more so when he laid eyes on the fossils. But knowing Micah, he’s still incredibly stubborn.

“Ain’t no way that thing is real.”

“One needs an open mind to comprehend what’s prehistoric Mr.Bell. It requires a certain practice.”

Every so often on your work you’d run into Micah who’d be riding around on his horse, just passing by. By now you’d consider him a friend and your face lit up as he pulled a small ammonite fossil from his bag.

It wasn’t really your area of expertise but you could tell he wanted to impress you and seemed almost nervous as you examined the fossil. Nonetheless you could tell it was real and you let him keep the small fossil as a reminder of you until the next time you saw him.

Javier Escuella

Javier meets you when you’re down my the docks, trying to capture the sunlight and noticed him fishing.

Not wanting to disturb him you kept out of his hair until you heard him cheer loudly at a catch he managed to pull in. In your particular interest in animals, you couldn’t help but ask if you could take a photo of the fish he’d caught.

From then on the two of you became friends, often running into each other as you tried to capture landscapes and wildlife.

You’d always spend the day together and you’d show him how to use a camera while he showed you how to fish and play the guitar.

When you spent time apart you’d often write to each other to fill the gap. You’d always send pictures with little writing on the back of them while he sent you poems and songs that he wrote for you, promising to play them for you next time you’d meet.

In your personal journal you have the first picture you ever took of Javier, kept safe between the pages. He’s standing along the docks, facing the away from the water as he holds up a large sturgeon and a large smile.

You and Javier always stay in touch and after he told you of his chaotic and dangerous time in guarma he made light of it by telling you about all the different wildlife he saw while he was there.

Bill Williamson

Bill stumbles upon you in the wild by accident. He’s out scouting a lead when he ended up getting lost through the shrubbery and found you examining flowers closely.

When you told him you were a botanist he looked as if you’d just spoken a different language to him because he didn’t have a clue as to what that meant. Bill always made you laugh fondly at the confused look when you told him all the scientific names of flowers.

In Bill’s mind, a flower was a flower. There was purple flowers and blue flowers and even red ones but they didn’t have their own names.

The next time Bill ran into you he brought you what he thought was a bouquet of white flowers. Instead they were actually a species of weed that was poisonous when eaten but it didn’t stop you from smiling and hugging him which was the intended purpose.

In light of that incident Bill was actually curious about some plants, trying to learn about them more. When Bill went exploring with you he pointed out some of his favourites and you picked a few to put them in the brim of his hat for him to take him back to camp.

When you run into him again Bill tries to give you another flower, this time actually understanding the plant he’d picked was a Vanilla Flower Orchid or the Vanilla planifolia but he never learnt how to pronounce it unlike you.

With a high blush Bill placed the flower behind your ear and you pulled him into a hug, being careful not to crush the beautiful flower.

[margowrites]

Hi my lovely friend! I have another request if that’s ok, please and thank you❤️❤️How about from teaching ideas- “How do you spell it?” With either Bucky and reader or even Bucky and Steve (either is totally fine) and you can add an AU if you like! Could be like college AU or something or regular! Yay! Thank you! Hugs and love❤️

Can’t Take My Eyes off of You

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader (College AU!)

Summary: You’ve been infatuated with a boy in your class for quite some time. This time all the seats are taken and he’s sitting next to you, making it harder for you to concentrate on the lesson. Bucky asks for help with spelling, not that he really needs it but it’s an excuse to hear your voice.

Word count: 1,625

Author’s Notes: My sweetie pie @jobean12-blog ❤️ I can’t thank you enough for being so incredibly kind and sending me requests 🥺 they make me truly so happy and I’m so honoured to write something for you! Hugs to you my beautiful friend ❤️❤️❤️

Warnings: Fluff, crushes, Bucky is a little sassy towards the Professor, Professor Wilson, mild language (one or two words of fuck), crushes to lovers implied.

If it was under any other circumstances, you would be positive that it was the heatwave outside that caused you to sweat profusely and your clothes to stick to your skin. You would blame it on the sun that was far too hot combined with the speed walk you did across campus just so you wouldn’t miss your class. You would blame it on any other reason apart from the true reason as to why you were currently sitting in your seat with your heart pounding out of your chest, covered in sweat with your hands shaking and unable to grip your pen.

And the real reason wasn’t because of the summer heatwave, the sun or the unbearable and sticky humidity. Your current state is all because of one boy; A top A student in all of his classes, a boy who makes all the girls and even some of the boys swoon just because of his existence. A boy, who loves his leather jackets - even in the scorching heatwave - likes to keep his hair tied back into a bun or low ponytail. A boy who loves to wear his dark jeans and dogtags. An almost 19 year old boy named Bucky Barnes, who you also happen to have a very big crush on. The same boy who was currently sitting right next to you because he was late to class and all the other seats were taken.

This lesson wouldn’t be easy. You were just so infatuated by him. Everything Bucky did fascinated you and you often found yourself staring at him in a dreamlike state when the two of you had the same classes. Watching the way he would roll his toothpick between his teeth, the way he would hold his pen and letting the tip of it glide smoothly across the paper to write down notes. The way he would swing back dangerously in his chair only to be told off by Professor Wilson because, “boy, you could swing back so much your head would crack against my floor and I’m not cleaning it up. Sit properly!”

Bucky even smelled so good, like soo soo good. A sandalwood scent mixed with sweat and something else permeated the dusty air around you that tickled your nostrils that you were sure you would be smelling for days. Not that you would ever complain about that. Being this close to him was a once in a lifetime opportunity and you would make the most of it.

“Y/N?” His voice rang through your ears, snapping you out of your current thoughts. His voice was deep for a college boy, his blue eyes watching you carefully.

You cleared your throat and shifted awkwardly in your chair. Your damp clothes from the sweat squeaked against the hard plastic, causing your cheeks to heat up in embarrassment. If Bucky heard, he didn’t comment on it. That was the other thing you liked about him. Bucky was mostly polite, unless you crossed him, in which his ex-girlfriend caused a scene in the cafeteria one time and Bucky came prepared with his colourful language. They had been having problems for quite some time according to his other friend, Wanda who filled you in on all the gossip. “I- yes?” You stuttered, shaking your head as though it might just shake your nerves away.

“I said, can I borrow a pen? I gave mine to Steve who is currently holding it hostage…” he chuckled nervously, scratching the back of his neck. Wait, why was he nervous?

You nodded and pulled a spare black pen from your pencil case. From your observations, you learned he loved to write in black ink only and that’s what you gave him with shaky hands, you pushed it towards him and smiled.

“Thanks, doll! I owe you one!” He smirked, plucking the toothpick from his mouth and licking his plump pink lips.

Oh Jesus Christ.

You knew this would be impossible. Everything Professor Wilson was teaching right now went right over your head. You just knew it was something something about dinosaurs. No information was registering and trying to concentrate just wasn’t going to happen. Not when your crush was right next to you, anyway. The veins in his hands were prominent and the temptation was strong to run your fingertips over the lines. His other hand was moving quickly as he jotted down notes, already halfway down the page. You blinked and stared down at your blank page. Your mind refusing to soak in what’s being taught and your hand refusing to lift your pen and write. Something would be better than nothing, you tell yourself but you’re nervous. Bucky is more interesting than the lesson.

Bucky stops writing for a few seconds to look at you. He frowns, curious if something is going on because from his own observations he knows this is one of your favourite lessons and you’re always keeping up.

Bucky leans in, his breath fanning against the shell of your ear sends a shiver down your spine. “Are you okay?” He smiles, his shirt too tight for his body, you notice.

You nod and smile awkwardly. “Yeah, I’m fine, just finding it difficult to catch up this time.” You sigh, your racing heart still pounding in your chest. The room feels much hotter than it was when you first arrived, even with the air conditioning cranked up.

“Okay, doll. Just checking.” He smirked and started to swing back on his chair as the professor started the second half of his lesson.

Professor Wilson walked around with his hands behind his back as he talked about fossils and mammals that existed almost 169 million years ago. “Mr Barnes! Put your legs on the ground in this instance!” Professor Wilson lectured him and shot him a stern warning look.

“They are on the ground.” Bucky sassed back, rolling his eyes and earning giggles from girls a couple of desks away. Professor Wilson sighed and shook his head.

“If you fall and crack your head I-”

“Yeah, yeah. You won’t clean it up, I know.” Bucky dismissed Professor Wilson’s worries with a wave of his hand and started to take notes once again as soon as the professor carried on with his lesson.

“And the Tuojiangosaurus was found in China 157 million years ago. It was known to be 7.0m in length and weighed a hefty 1500kg.” Professor Wilson brought up slides of what the dinosaur would have looked like.

“What a fuckin’ beast.” Bucky murmured under his breath, “how do you spell whatever he just said?”

A breathy laugh escapes you and you scratch an itch on your nose. “Uh so, TUOJIANGOSAURUS.” You spelled out for him slowly.

“Thanks doll. I thought you weren’t paying attention to the lesson.” He teases, a sly smirk on his face.

“I remembered the spelling from my spelling bee test.” You grow shy under his now intense and impressive stare.

“Well, he should have these in big letters on the board.” He scoffed and you giggled.

“He… does…” you point to writing under the pictures, the names of the dinosaurs in big black bold letters. A shade of pink dusts Bucky’s cheeks and he dips his head with a smile.

“I know, I just like hearing your voice. You sound really sweet. S’like music to m’ears.”

Oh my goodness. This couldn’t be happening, right?

“Oh I uh- really?” You stammered, mesmerised by his homely blue eyes.

“Really doll, I’ve wanted to ask you-”

“Barnes! Since you’re distracted. Tell the class about the Triceratops. We’re waiting.” Professor Wilson stands in front of your desk, his arms folded over his chest and his foot taps impatiently against the tiled floor. All eyes are on Bucky as he sighs and subtly rolls his eyes under his eyelids.

“The- whatever you just said is a horny dinosaur with teeth.”

“Correction. He has a horny beak.”

“That’s what I said.”

“Please elaborate next time Barnes.” Professor Wilson shakes his head and his eyes narrow on your blank page. “Miss y/l/n? Why have you not been taking notes?!”

Your voice was lost, what could you tell him? That you were too busy watching your crush and not paying attention?

“She’s not feeling well and she can copy my notes. S’no big deal.” Bucky spoke and you felt so relieved. Professor Wilson seemed to be satisfied with that answer and went back to finish up his lesson.

“Thank you.” You leaned in and whispered, sighing when things didn’t feel any better for you. Your heart rate was still out of control and you’re pretty sure there might be a damp spot on your seat.

“It’s okay, doll face. You can copy my notes and be my study buddy in the library if you want to.”

If you want to? Of course you want to!

“Yes- I’d like that!” You smiled and pulled your lip between your teeth. “What were you going to say earlier? Before Professor Wilson interrupted?”

Bucky’s cheeks turned from a light shade of pink to a crimson red. He chuckled quietly and nervously.

“You’ll say no!” He chuckled, his eyes darting from your eyes to your lips.

“Try me.” You challenge, mimicking his movements with your eyes.

“I’ll tell you when we’re at the library. Deal?” He winks, and shushes you as he writes down his final notes, catching the slight nod of your head.

Your mind went into a frenzy. All it took was for all the seats to be taken and for Bucky to sit next to you this once to escalate things. You wished he was late sooner. What was he going to say to you earlier? You couldn’t wait to find out as you sunk back in your chair with the biggest smile on your face, feeling like the happiest person in the world.